#he isn’t able to actually break that cycle

[local-redhead-bookworm]

This is near the end of Almiria’s screentime

And this is chronologically the earliest scene we have of McGillis’ backstory

Just two frightened children fighting for survival.

[scatteredcloud]

Can’t afford my gender affirming beers so I guess I have to start smoking the eight I bought like 6 months ago before I promptly stopped smoking

[rindreamery]

growing old.

itoshi rin doesn't like thinking about growing old. but one question from you has him thinking about his future, and he’s not sure if he hates the idea of growing old anymore. as long as it's with you. itoshi rin x reader ─ fluff, comfort, w.c. 1.1k+ ─ content: fears of growing old

all it took was one question— “where do you think we’ll be ten years from now?” — to send itoshi rin spiraling.

the idea of growing old isn’t something that rin thinks of often. after all, he’s still a young man with his whole life ahead of him. his parents aren’t pressuring him to think about his future-beyond just yet, and all he really needs to worry about is his career. and, to be fair, it’s also not really something he wants to dwell on either— not when growing old comes with the insinuation that he won’t be like this forever. he doesn’t want to think of the day when his body can no longer function the way it does now, and the day he has to find purpose outside of soccer.

but, your question has rin thinking about you in his future; settling down, growing old, and the uncertainty of it all.

he likes what he has with you now, and he's sure that your relationship classifies as "settling down" at this point. but you're still young right now, and things change when you become older. and with change comes uncertainty. the weird and uncomfortable feeling that comes with uncertainty has never been rin's favorite.

he just doesn’t like the thought of no longer having energy to take you out on, albeit spontaneous, 2 a.m runs to the convenience store. that would mean that he would no longer be able to watch you consume an unhealthy amount of ramen and coffee (with a small and lovesick smile on his face), only to wake up later (next to him) with regrets and a bloated face. but you wake up happy, nonetheless, and that makes him happy.

rin doesn’t want to fall into a dull cycle of normalcy while growing old with you.

it's not that he doubts his love for you when he thinks of this— he loves you more than his actual understanding of what love is. but growing old with you comes with the pressure to constantly “get it right,” to keep you satisfied and by his side, and he wonders whether the life he’s building for you two will be sustainable and fulfilling. will you still want to be with him ten years down the line?

growing old, rin concludes, is scary.

(when you had mindlessly asked the question, you hadn’t anticipated for him to think so deeply about it. and yet, he has that faraway, distant look in his eyes that you’ve learned to recognize as him being deep in thought. a part of you feels guilty for wanting to giggle at the look on his face; he’s cute when he’s lost in thought. the way his brows knit ever so slightly, the way his lips go back to its natural pout, and the feeling of his hands tightening on your waist—)

“you’re thinking too much right now,” your voice finally breaks him out of his spiral, and his grip loosens immediately. there's a sheepish look that flashes on his face as his focus is drawn back to you, and you’re already staring at him with your soft and welcoming eyes. he can feel your arms draping over his shoulders, and he brings his arms to wrap around your waist and pull you in. “you don’t need to think so hard about the question, silly.”

he huffs at your words, displeased at being called silly. “you asked a serious question.”

“okay, true,” you hum in understanding. “you wanna hear my answer first, then?”

he pretends to think for a second, and he gives you a subtle nod before he’s nuzzling into the crook of your neck. a content sigh escapes you as he fully leans into you, and you run your fingers through his hair as you think about your answer.

it’s not that you’ve never considered the future before— you’ve thought about it more times than you could count on your fingers. but having rin so close, with his arms wrapped around you, makes you feel more sure in your thoughts. you’ve always felt that the future with him was less of a mystery and more of a promise of what's to come.

it makes you wonder if he feels the same.

you pull back from his embrace (just barely) so that you could look him in the eye as you speak, and the frown on his lips return at the feeling of being stripped of your warmth. his eyes are still serious, and there’s a touch of uncertainty in them. almost as if he’s not sure if he wants to hear what you have to say.

you can’t blame him. neither of you have so-openly talked about the future with one another.

“well i think…” you begin, your voice quiet but firm, “in ten years, i’ll still be with you. you’ll still be tagging along with me to those 2 a.m. trips to the convenience store, because you won’t be able to resist teasing me about my late-night cravings. but maybe i’ll be eating healthier snacks—” you pause, listening to him scoff at your last sentence. it earns him a nudge in response, and his lips twitch up ever so slightly.

“i also think,” you continue, “that we’ll find new things to enjoy together. new places to visit, new experiences to have. and maybe we won’t be the same as we are now—” you shrug lightly, “but that’s okay. i want to grow older with you, and i’m not scared of it. i’ll enjoy it because it's with you.”

for a second, you think you may have said too much— maybe scared him off with prospect of growing old together. but his firm grip that keeps you in his arms is comforting, and you realize that he's right there with you; on the same page.

there's a long silence as rin takes in everything you have to say. neither of you say anything for a while, as if afraid to disturb the delicate moment. it's just you, him, and the slowly shrinking distance between the two of you.

“and i think,” rin breaks the silence after mulling over his words (he knows he's not the best at saying what he means), and he leans in until his lips are barely ghosting over yours. “you’re gonna be stuck with me for longer than ten years.”

© rindreamery, 2024

[bloomzone]

2025 : #17 THE ULTIMATE GUIDE ABOUT PROCRASTINATION

✒️.Procrastination is more than just putting things off as all "procrastination definition" says . It’s an internal BATTLE or WAR against your own brain. When you procrastinate you're not just delaying a task you’re delaying PROGRESS. The longer you wait the harder it gets so yeah It's an endless loop of guilt stress and self-sabotage. But what if you could break that cycle? What if you could stop hiding from your tasks and actually face them head-on? but ..

ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ᴘʀᴏʙʟᴇᴍ ɪs ᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴀᴠᴏɪᴅɪɴɢ ᴅɪsᴄᴏᴍғᴏʀᴛ

Think about why you procrastinate. It’s not because you’re lazy it’s because you’re avoiding discomfort cuz Every time you put something off, it’s because your brain perceives that task as a threat to your comfort zone. Whether it’s a project at work, school assignments, or even cleaning your room, the thought of doing it brings up feelings of discomfort, stress, and anxiety. So, your brain tells you, “ hell nah bro just put it off. do something else that feels better right now.”

the reality is that DISCOMFORT is part of the PROCESS. You don’t have to feel good to do the work In fact the more you put things off to avoid feeling uncomfortable the harder and more uncomfortable it will become later. But if you can get comfortable with discomfort, you’ll realize that starting is half the battle. Once you take the first step the rest follows.

ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍɪɴᴅ ᴏғ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴄʀᴀsᴛɪɴᴀᴛᴏʀ

procrastination is about “fear and avoidance.” You fear failure, you fear not doing a task perfectly, and you fear not measuring up to your own or others' expectations. This fear triggers the avoidance mechanism in your brain your limbic system, the emotional part of your brain that seeks to protect you from discomfort. This makes it hard to make decisions or take action when the task feels overwhelming.

Your rational brain knows you need to get the work done HE TRY TO WAKE UP U but the emotional brain doesn’t care. It wants relief and it wants it now. So, you find yourself scrolling on your phone, watching another episode, or simply zoning out (like me). The task doesn’t disappear it only grows more daunting. The longer you avoid it the worse it feels. That’s why procrastination feels like a snowball effect

ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏsᴛ ᴏғ ᴘʀᴏᴄʀᴀsᴛɪɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ: ᴡʜʏ ɪᴛ ʜᴜʀᴛs

Every time you procrastinate, you’re paying a price. The cost is MENTAL and EMOTIONAL exhaustion. The weight of the task sits in the back of your mind nagging at you. You feel guilt, shame, and frustration for not taking action. And then that stress builds up over time.Procrastination also eats up your time. The more time you waste avoiding, the less time you have to actually get things done. When you finally force yourself to sit down and work, you have less energy and less time to do it well. This leads to rushed, sloppy work, and the cycle continues. It’s a trap that leads to more stress and anxiety. It’s like digging a hole for yourself each moment you wait, the hole gets deeper.

ᴛʜᴇ ʜɪᴅᴅᴇɴ ɪᴍᴘᴀᴄᴛ: sᴇʟғ-sᴀʙᴏᴛᴀɢᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ʟᴏᴡ sᴇʟғ-ᴡᴏʀᴛʜ

Procrastination can also impact your self-esteem (this is sick) Every time you delay, you reinforce the belief that you're not good enough or that you can’t manage your responsibilities. Over time, procrastination can feed into self-doubt. You start thinking, "I’m just not the kind of person who gets things done" or "I’ll never be able to accomplish my goals." So procrastination is a form of self-sabotage. You’re stopping yourself from reaching your potential. You have dreams, you have goals, but procrastination convinces you that you’re not worthy of success or that you don’t deserve to put in the effort.

ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ᴏᴠᴇʀᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴄʀᴀsᴛɪɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ : ᴏᴘᴇɴ ᴜʀ ᴍɪɴᴅ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪs !

1. Stop Waiting for Motivation.

Motivation isn’t something that just magically appears when you need it. It comes after you start doing the work, not before. You can’t wait for motivation to strike u have to create it

So How? By taking the first step, however small. Set a timer for 5 minutes, sit down, and start. Action creates motivation.

2. Break Tasks Into Bite-Sized Pieces.

When a task feels huge, it becomes overwhelming, and that's when procrastination sets in. Instead of thinking about the entire project, break it down into smaller, manageable parts. Want to write an essay? Start by writing one paragraph. Want to clean your room? Tackle one section. Small wins lead to bigger wins. Each time you check something off, it builds momentum.

3. Eliminate Distractions.

Procrastination thrives on distractions. The phone, the TV, social media they’re all little traps that pull you away from what needs to be done. Set boundaries. Turn off notifications, put your phone on airplane mode, and create a space where you can focus without interruptions. The goal isn’t perfection, but efficiency. SO THROW UR PHONE AWAY

4. Don’t Wait for the "Right" Time.

There’s never going to be a “perfect” time to start. You’re never going to feel 100% ready. The trick is to get started even when you don’t feel like it. The longer you wait for the “right moment,” the longer the task stays on your to-do list. Start before you’re ready. Trust that you can figure it out as you go.(Like those ppl who have an exam in a Monday and they wait until the perfect time 🤭 and the perfect time become a Sunday night 🥶)

5. Embrace Imperfection.

Perfectionism is procrastination’s best friend. You keep delaying because you want everything to be perfect. But hear me out : done is better than perfect. The task doesn’t need to be flawless; it needs to be completed. You can always improve it later, but only if you take action now.as long as u put effort

ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀ ᴏғ ᴀᴄᴄᴏᴜɴᴛᴀʙɪʟɪᴛʏ : ʙʏᴏʙ 📢

Sometimes, the best way to break the procrastination cycle is to hold yourself accountable. Tell someone what you’re working on. Whether it’s a friend, a family member, or even a colleague, let them know your goals. When you have someone checking in on your progress, it creates a sense of urgency. If you're someone who struggles with motivation, having external accountability can push you to stop procrastinating and get things done.

ᴏᴠᴇʀᴄᴏᴍɪɴɢ ɢᴜɪʟᴛ ᴀɴᴅ sᴛᴀʀᴛɪɴɢ ғʀᴇsʜ

It’s easy to get stuck in a cycle of guilt. You feel bad for procrastinating, which makes you procrastinate even more. But guilt is not helpful. It’s normal to slip up or delay things. What matters is that you get back on track. Forgive yourself. Don’t let the guilt weigh you down please please please Instead, focus on the task at hand. Take that first step . Break through the resistance

ᴛʜᴇ ᴋᴇʏ ᴛᴏ sᴜᴄᴄᴇss: ᴄᴏɴsɪsᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ

Procrastination is not something you can “cure” overnight. It’s a habit, and habits take time to change. The goal isn’t to be perfect every time it’s to be consistent. The more consistent you are with taking action, the easier it becomes to fight procrastination. Slowly, you’ll start building momentum, and before you know it, you’ll be taking action without second-guessing yourself. (for example set a challenge of one week without procrastination and u will see change)

AT THE END IT'S UR CHOSE : DISCOMFORT TO SUCCESS OR COMFORT TO FAIL

It’s not going to be easy. But you’ve got this AAAAAAH . The pain of procrastination will always be worse than the pain of getting started. Take control, start small, and build from there. Procrastination may try to convince you it’s too hard but you’re stronger than that. Start now, and watch the weight of procrastination lift off your shoulders.

@bloomzone 📇

[daycourtofficial]

Hello. If you don't mind can I request a fic with cassian with a shy reader where she and Cassian have been trying to get pregnant for years, but reader starts doubting herself when seeing the rest of the inner circle females like feyre and elain getting pregnant, and thinking cassian will leave her because it is taking them ages to get pregnant...but Cassian reassures her and all...and weeks later reader finds out she is pregnant and surprises cassian with the news...

Ask and you shall receive! This is actually super super cute so thank you for this request!

A Teeny, Tiny Illyrian Warrior

Summary: after years of trying, you break down crying to Cassian over your inability to conceive, only to find out several months later that you are expecting

It was irrational. You should be happy for Elain, sweet Elain who you considered a great friend. Elain, who after several years of healing, figured out what she wanted, and moved to live with Lucien to help rebuild the spring court, just announced she was pregnant.

Making her the third Archeron to be pregnant, with Nesta and Eris having a baby a few years prior.

It was exhausting. Everyone around you was churning out babies, except for you and Cassian. You’ve both wanted kids for so long, but when Rhys was trapped under the mountain, the two of you decided to pause your dreams to help run and maintain Velaris in his absence. The fear of a child growing up in Amarantha’s reign was terrifying enough to keep the dreams at bay.

The tonic you took every day to keep you from getting pregnant had felt like sewage down your throat.

When Rhys had returned, you were so excited not just for your brother in law’s return, but for what it meant for you and Cassian. You could try. And try you did. You let Amarantha stop you from conceiving, but the war with Hybern would do no such thing.

So the two of you spent the first few years excited, constantly tearing at each other’s clothes. Until your cycles would come. And come. And come, each one a reminder of what isn’t to come.

Then Feyre got pregnant, and you were ecstatic, over the moon. Then Nesta got pregnant a few years later. You were still happy, but the jealousy was clawing your throat. Now Elain’s pregnant, and it is taking every ounce of strength not to ask why her.

The past year sex has almost felt more like a chore than pleasure, your empty womb keeping both of you wanting more.

You plaster on a smile, congratulate the two of them, and after dinner you go and slink away into the bathroom, hide your head in your hands, and sob.

Sob because it should be you announcing your pregnancy. Sob because everyone should be happy for you. Sob because what if Cassian decides you’re not enough?

He sees all these females getting pregnant - what if he decides you’re the problem? He could find loads of females willing to fill that role. Does he wonder how quickly he could impregnate them?

Your sobs are so out of control that you don’t hear the door open and close and a body sits next to you.

“Here,” he says, handing you a handkerchief. You pull your hands away to find Azriel, your other brother in law.

You and Azriel were incredibly close - both of you perfect foils to Cassian’s loud, swaggering personality. The two of you were more quiet and observant, Cass being enough personality for the three of you.

You accept the handkerchief, wiping your eyes and blowing your nose, creating the ugliest noise imaginable.

Azriel stretches out his long legs, resting his back against the cabinet. “I know it’s hard,” he says, reaching out to rub your back, “but it will be okay.”

You lean into him, and choke out, “what if he decides I’m not enough? That he could easily find someone who is able to get pregnant?”

Azriel’s hand halts its soothing strokes for a brief moment before continuing. “If you think for one moment he would ever be separated from you by his own choice, think again.”

You go to respond but he cuts you off, “Cassian would cut off his own hand before willingly letting go of yours.”

You two sit there, his words echoing through your mind, when he starts again.

“For what it’s worth,” he says, standing up, “if your child has his eyes and your smile, it’ll blow all the other babies out of the water with its cuteness.”

You smile, accepting the hand he reaches out for you, “I always knew you had a soft spot for Cass’s eyes.”

He laughs, tucking your hand into his elbow to lead you out, “they’re just so pitiful. He pouts and he looks like a kicked puppy.”

You laugh, allowing him to escort you back to the dining room, back to your family.

Later that night, as you and Cassian are taking a bath, you decide to broach the subject that’s been bouncing around your head since Azriel found you in the bathroom.

“What if we stop trying?”

Cassian’s hand reaches up from behind you to cup your face, tilting your chin back so you can look at him, “Stop trying what?”

“Stop trying for a baby.”

His grin is gone immediately, about to ask if you’ve changed your mind, and you spin in his laps to meet his eyes.

You grab his chin and tell him, “I don’t mean like we give up. I mean we stop trying. Sex has felt like a chore for a while, and I miss it being fun. Now it’s just a means to an end.

“I want fun sex, I want dirty sex, I want it all. But I want to stop our ‘only doing this to have a baby’ sex. I won’t take the tonic, but I’m tired of the heartbreak. If it happens, it happens.”

He looks at you, your wet hair making you look even more like a goddess to him, as he cups your chin and asks, “are you sure, love?”

You smile, “yes. Maybe we can go back to trying in a bit, but I want a break. I don’t like the feelings it’s causing, like I broke down in tears earlier that you would leave me for a more breedable woman.”

Cassian snorts, “did you actually call them breedable women?”

You smack his arm, “poor Azriel found me a blubbering mess. I’m pretty sure he should just burn the handkerchief he gave me because all of the snot and tears made it gain five pounds.”

He chuckles, but then he looks at you, conveying every emotion he feels for you, and you know you were a fool for ever thinking he’d consider leaving you.

“Sweetheart, I would never leave you for such a thing. I want a baby, yes, but I want you more, and I would be perfectly content spending the next thousand years with only you by my side.”

Your legs bracket around his thighs, and you rub your fingers up his arms as you tell him, “I can think of a few ways we could spend those thousand years.”

He throws his head back laughing, and crashes his lips to yours.

-

It had been six months since Elain’s announcement, and the babe was here. Feyre and Rhys traveled to spring to go visit, leaving you, Cassian, and Azriel alone.

Cassian was out shopping for Solstice gifts, an activity you were going to join him for until you woke up not feeling well. After much convincing and promising him if you need anything you’ll get Az to get it for you, he went ahead without you, needing to pick up gifts before shops closed.

After spending the first hour of his departure in the bathroom throwing up what felt like all of your internal organs, you wandered out into the hallway in search of your husband’s brother.

After a fifteen minute search, you found him in the library reading what appears to be a romance novel that Nesta left behind.

“Doing some studying?” You ask, peering over his shoulder at the particularly raunchy scene he was reading.

He jumps, having had no idea of your intrusion. He clears his throat, asking, “weren’t you supposed to go shopping today?”

You walk around the couch, sitting next to him and looking at the cover of the book he was reading.

“I was, but felt ill so I stayed behind and convinced Cassian to go without me.”

He snorts, “bad idea. You reign him in a lot when it comes to gift giving, otherwise he forgets how much he’s already bought for someone and just buys more.”

You were about to agree, your husband’s joy at buying gifts knowing no bounds, when his brother stills, slowly sniffing the air and turning towards you and asking, almost accusatorially, “are you pregnant?”

You look at him, half tempted to yell at him over his inclusion of the sore subject. You felt freer these past few months, less bogged down by the negative emotions your inability to conceive was creating.

Azriel had seen it all with you, acting as a source of comfort during all the uncertainty the past sixty years have shown.

His asking that question and your earlier illness is what led the two of you to see Madja very quickly, who confirmed the pregnancy.

“How am I going to tell him?” You ask Azriel, as you two walk around the Sidra. You already felt guilty that Azriel had been the one with you when you found out and not Cassian, however that guilt subsided when you realized if you weren’t pregnant the disappointment on Cassian’s face would have ruined you.

“Well anytime anyone ever asks Cass for advice, he always steers them towards nudity.”

You laugh at how true the starement was. Feyre asking Cassian advice on a gift for Rhys? Nudity. Rhys asking for advice on a gift for Azriel? Nudity. He was a simple man, he’d tell them in response.

You pass by a baby shop and find your eyes drawn to it, your feet pulling you back in front of the door. Azriel follows your line of sight, sweeping his arm in front of you motioning ‘after you’.

The two of you walk around, looking through baby clothes when a sales associate comes and speaks to you. “Ah are you two expecting?” she chirps, looking pleasantly between the two of you.

You laugh while Azriel blushes and reply, “he’s my husband’s brother.”

The sales associate gapes, her jaw going slack. “Oh um okay, well it’s none of my business-“

Before she can finish rambling, Azriel cuts her off. “I’m helping her pick something out to tell my brother he’s going to be a dad to a child that is not mine.”

She looks between you two and laughs at the mistake. “Did you have anything in mind?”

You tell her that you actually had an idea.

-

When Cassian got home, he was tired from lugging around at least two dozen shopping bags. He was exhausted, but incredibly proud of himself because he’s fairly certain he was able to get gifts for everyone, meaning most, if not all, the shopping was done.

The house was quiet, so he took the opportunity to hide the ruby red necklace and earrings he got for you in this old dried fruit container he kept on a top shelf, a place you’d never search for, much less be able to see.

After the gift was tucked away, he began walking through the house trying to find you, deciding you’d likely be in your shared bedroom. Making his way there he stopped in the hallway, finding a tiny little baby sock on the floor.

He looks around, not finding anything else strange he picks it up and continues his search. Passing through the kitchen he found another baby sock, in the dining room he found a little tiny hat, in another hallway he found a little tiny pair of pants that look just like his fighting leathers.

There must be a naked baby running around here somewhere, he thinks.

Right outside the door to your shared room is a little shirt that also looks just like his fighting leathers, with teeny tiny slats in the back for wings.

He grabs the door knob, twisting to enter the room as he begins asking, “is there a naked tiny Illyrian war-“

He stops dead in his tracks at the oh so subtle smell in the room, coating the room in florals he never thought he’d smell from you. He looks up from the shirt, finding you sitting on your bed with tears in your eyes.

“It’s me, I have a teeny tiny Illyrian warrior so I bought them teeny tiny Illyrian fighting leathers for all the teeny tiny threats they’ll have to fight.”

Your husband takes off running towards you, kissing you like his life depended on it. Then he picked you up off the ground, spun you around, and ran out of your bedroom with you. He’s running through the whole house shouting, “she’s having my baby!” Repeating it over and over, until he almost collides with Azriel. Before Azriel can say anything, Cassian picks him up too, spinning the both of you. All three of you laugh at the pure joy radiating off of Cassian after so many years of wanting.

[lothcat-lothcat-lothwolf-run]

Hey guys! Remember this page in journal 3?

So I actually tried to replicate the reading! While the first two cards don’t match anything in my deck (the rider waite smith version, as that’s what matches the 3rd card best), I was able to get the next two.

We have the two of swords (the third card), usually representing indecision and protection while right, and manipulation and blocked intuition while reversed. Her view is obscured and she is posed as if to defend herself against the unknown.

Now, in this context, even though all cards are shown as upright in the journal, I have to say that in the reading, it would be most likely reversed. Ford has to make a decision soon, and while his past pain and fear of the future blind him, he is also being manipulated into something he isn’t.

We can also assume that the skull (the 4th card) represents death. Death, as a part of the major arcana, is a very misunderstood card. In most cases, it represents the ability to change. In the frack we can assume the palm reader is using, the skeleton is yellow(!!!) a color associated with holiness (!!!). It represents not only the cycle of change, but time.

We can safely say that this card is upright in ford’s reading, for multiple changes are to happen in next few pages of the book.

Now, the first two cards are harder. The use of the snake in tarot often represents the development, so that’s the card I’ve chosen to be the second one in the draw. The devil, while upright, represents addiction and manipulation., as well as sabotage. It is also very connected to “the lovers”, another card in the major arcana.

In a reading, the devil represents self-destruction and toxic relationships, especially controlling partners (sound familiar?). For these reasons, we can assume that the devil is facing upright.

The first card was the hardest for me to find a match to. Instead, I selected a card that I feel would match the current situation and the page in the journal best: the nine of swords. This card, reversed or not, symbolizes anxiety and terror. The act of journaling (!!!) as a coping mechanism is tied closely to this card. Additionally, it represents emotional solitude and anxiety creating a decline on your physical health. This card portrays a man sitting awake in bed, with the objects of his worry scatted around him.

This is very ford vibes to me, for obvious reasons. While it wasn’t the card portrayed (as I can find no matching one), I feel it is the one that completes the reading best.

Overall, the reading says that Ford is overwhelmed with fear of his past mirroring his future, and that, along with the manipulation and toxic relationships, is causing him to loose his sense of self.

The tarot carda recommend: journaling, taking with loved ones, a better sleep schedule, and also breaking up with the evil Dorito man.

[guttedwhxre]

─ 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌 ❞ multiple slashers

UNDER THE CUT: bo sinclair, michael myers, billy loomis & stu macher

tw: reader death ment, violence, torture ment

author's note: photo courtesy of @/pngsnail <3 also, hi everyone! i missed you, did you miss me?

michael is one of the most particular of the slashers, and dating him means you must be able to handle his peculiarities. this requires patience and resilience to do so, losing your temper would only result in pissing him off. michael won’t have quarter for being patronized and demeaned, not anymore. a pissed off michael typically means a deadly michael — but your death won’t be immediate. he’ll toy with you, gradually making your life worse and worse. he’ll allow you to keep blowing up at him, snap at him, until one night michael ends it all, for good. as you look up at him while you bleed out on the floor, cursing him under your breath, he’ll slowly don his mask, and leave you there without a second thought. 

while he won’t allow a bad temper, or disrespect of any kind, michael is surprisingly lenient about you boundaries. as long as you’re firm, and gentle he’ll let it slide. in fact, he almost encourages it. in his own, twisted way. again, michael will push you in small ways until something is done about it. here you can blow up, or collect yourself and gently, yet firmly tell him what he’s done wrong and ask him to stop. that’s only the first part however, as you have to consistently keep these boundaries, or michael will push, push, and keep pushing. 

don’t let him threaten you. he’s not actually trying to kill you when he holds his blade to your neck, no, just testing you. even if you’re into that, you have to be able to differentiate between play time, and a test. once you know that’s he’s testing you, cut him off there. ask that he doesn’t put his knife to you outside of play time, and he’ll slowly drop the knife from your neck, tracing it down your front as he tries to initiate play. however, if you let him press the cold steel into your neck, sit still as his gaze rests on his knife and your supple flesh - he’ll stop there, for now. then another day, when he comes home, he’ll “accidentally” cut you with his knife, watch as you rush around to clean and cover up the wound, gently asking him to be more careful next time. more little “accidents” will follow, each one more life-threatening than the last, and it’ll become more apparent that michael is toying with you. he just wants to see what will happen! just because you let him each time, he wants to see your breaking point. if that ends in your death, well, michael still got what he wanted. to see you break. 

to be clear, michael isn’t very picky about what kind of person you are. just stay consistent, keep your boundaries and make them clear, don’t be a pushover, then you and michael will be very happy together.

𐙚˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩

bo is a simple man. at least, that’s how he’d describe himself. he describes his ideal mate as the perfect house-spouse kind — docile, quiet, stays out of the way. but that is far from the truth. someone who submits with no questions asked, all of the time, would bore him. nah, bo sinclair needs someone to match his temper, his fire, not take any of his bullshit. when he blows up, shouts, you need to be able to stand your ground, and sometimes shout right back. it surprises him being challenged, excites him, even. go ahead baby, put him in his place. 

like with michael, constantly shouting and losing your temper at bo wouldn’t be the best idea. it wouldn’t result in your death, just a constant, toxic cycle of fighting and making up. it’s not fun, nor is it worth the exhaustion. you have to be able to know when to fight fire with fire, and when to back down and let bo do his thing. 

bo, to be totally honest, isn’t the kindest guy. he puts on a front for the tourists, sure, but that’s just that – a facade. to be with bo sinclair, you have to have tough skin. he’ll throw more than one insensitive comment your way, about your hair that day, your complexion, hell your weight, even if it’s not intentional. he’s never had to hold his tongue before, why would he now? you’ve gotta stand up for yourself, or else the comments will keep coming, and probably worsen over time. 

all of the sinclair brothers have been through a lot, and it’s affected them in different ways. but for all of them, bo especially, empathy will go a long, long way. take into consideration why he lashes out the way he does and be able to understand why. you don’t have to excuse his actions, just be able to tolerate them, and of course — stand up for yourself. 

𐙚˙⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩

with billy and stu, you’ve gotta be able to take a joke. a lot of jokes, at that. at your expense, the expense of others, billy and stu have absolutely NO filter and that won’t change when you’re around. be happy it doesn’t! it means they trust you. billy is meaner than stu by a longshot, so be prepared for them to take shots at you. to get them to stop, or at the very least let up a little, go at them right back! joke back or tell them to fuck off, either works. just avoid the topic of mommy issues unless you want a knife to your neck in a not fun way. 

you don’t need something super special to make them interested in you — just be you. do your own thing, mind your own business, be content with yourself. that kind of casual confidence is enthralling, and if one of them picks up on it, trust me, the other will know shortly after. 

gotta be okay with a little kick-back every once in a while — stu likes to party and billy is just fine tagging along, so that means you have to be too! stick to one of them the whole party if you need, though i don’t suggest it as it can very well lead to semi-public sex. unless, sweet thing, that’s exactly what you’re looking for — then be my guest!

stu is handsy. incredibly so. he needs to touch you often, so you’ve gotta be okay with physical contact frequently. he can’t help it! you’re so precious and touchable it makes his heart melt (and his cock hard). if you say no one too many times he’ll tattle on you to billy, which nobody wants — least of all you. billy is fiercely protective of both of you, and stu knows how spoiled he is. he will surely use that to his advantage, even if it’s to your detriment. 

billy often takes the lead when it comes to the three of you, and stu gives up control willingly, eagerly even. you don’t have to be as excited about it as stu is, but it’s best to hand control over day to day decisions to billy. he gets a little bitchy if you don’t, and no one wants a bitchy billy. just whisper to him that he knows best, that’s he’s so strong and capable…and then maybe you can slip a little suggestion in, and he’ll take it. since you’ve been so good…so yes, they’re both very susceptible to seduction.

billy and stu just want you to be you. if you can accept them at their ugliest, most carnal, real selves, they will gladly accept you.

xoxo, babe 💋ྀིྀི

[sickseraph]

the way you can look at the whole show of supernatural as a representation of trauma.

hunting as an analogy for generational trauma or abuse. we saw mary’s parents exposing her to the dangers of the hunting world as a young girl (teen? 18?). demon-possessed grandpa then ruins her life and dooms the boys. john introduces them to hunting from CHILDHOOD, is actively an abusive alcoholic as the boys grow up, and then also gets literally possessed by a demon. seeing a theme of repetitive demon possessions only in the men who can’t get over their trauma… hmm…

sam and dean being actual addicts as a parallel; the demon blood & the alcohol. dean has more going on than just alcohol but that’s how i’ll sum it up. sam is able to kick this habit because he actually has sufficient supportive ‘father’ figures in his life. dean doesn’t. that says a lot about how each of them ends up.

sam finally breaks the cycle of abuse and ‘hunting’ at the end, whereas dean never really gets the chance to become stable. maybe he was close, but i think part of the analysis i’m making is that dean isn’t a success story. he’s supposed to represent an addict dying to his trauma (hunting). sam overcame his literal addictions (demon blood) therefore he overcame the others (hunting).

moving on: angels and vessels. how many vessels are begging to be let go, only for the angel to ignore them? the way that angels promise a greater purpose full of wonder and then the vessels are just torn to shreds for however long the angel dictates. classic abusive relationship, no? can’t leave, abuse of power, long-lasting effects even after the angel leaves. jimmy was a good example of how once an angel touches you, you’re unsafe at best, and dead at worst. we saw angry former vessels, we saw them being tricked in a mind palace like sam within gadreel’s control. we got an entire storyline about how castiel irreparably ruined an entire family and, although he feels guilt, he never really atones for it. the show then lets us see maybe hundreds of angels in human vessels throughout the series, and we’re supposed to ignore that these people are potentially hostages.

god/heaven being “unaccepting parents”; heaven hating castiel specifically for his love for dean. the minute castiel laid a hand on you in hell he was lost. remember how they lobotomize him repeatedly until he’s able to murder dean without a flicker of emotion? they put him in conversion therapy bro!!!!!

anyway im not a professional so if anyone has more examples of this id love you to add them hehe

[agustdiv1ne]

telepathy (m) — cbg [TEASER]

OUT NOW! READ HERE!

pairing: choi beomgyu x fem!reader

genre: smut, strangers to ???, mind reader/telepathist!beomgyu, funeral home employee!beomgyu (it's for the plot ok??)

wc: tbd (projected to be around 7-8k)

synopsis: most people would abhor a packed subway car — but beomgyu, telepathist extraordinaire, relishes in it. with a career in the funeral business, he finds his morning commute to be the only thing that keeps him relatively sane. reading the mundane thoughts of mundane people maintains his tether to his humanity, but when he goes to read your mind...oh, things get a whole lot more interesting.

warnings: mdni!! 18+ only, there isn't much in this teaser, but here are the warnings for the rest of the fic so far: mentions of dead bodies, embalming, and funerals (though not very descriptive — it's only bc of gyu's profession), reader is a freak that listens to nsfw audios on her way to work!, gyu is a perv so it's a match made in heaven (hell?), explicit consent is given before anything happens bc consent is sexy <3, mind manipulation (he makes it feel like he's touching her), exhibitionism in a way...it will all make sense, trust 🙏

note: this is inspired by a p*rn audio LMAO,,, lmk if you'd like to be tagged via an ask, or just drop a comment below ^^

masterlist

☆ TEASER ☆

the rest of the weekend passes without fanfare, and monday returns to rear its ugly head once again. monday is beomgyu’s least favorite day of the week; it brings a raging headache from his 5 a.m. alarm, a bone-deep fatigue that lingers for the rest of the day. it brings grumpy commuters whose knees and elbows uncomfortably bump against his own. it brings people who think that he should give up his seat, and silently tell him so with narrowed eyes and furrowed eyebrows. how selfish, they all think whenever he actually bothers to read their thoughts. what a fucking dick, some of them even snarl within the so-called impenetrable walls of their minds, walls he so easily breaks down. he levels those ones with a half-awake glare, pupils gloomy and lifeless. internally, their uneasy reactions make him want to laugh, hysterically cackle in their faces because wow, is he really that scary? he shouldn’t be, but maybe the dark under eyes are doing something for him.

surprisingly, the subway car he frequents is less crowded than usual. not as many people stand in front of him, and he’s actually able to see directly across the car for the first time in a while. doors shut, and he’s left to look around at the regulars and the new patrons that often don’t show up again. they’re easily less interesting than the regulars. really, what can he say? the daily life updates satisfy his nosy tendencies. 

still, he hates mondays. mondays suck. mondays make him want to crawl into a hole and eventually join the bodies at his workplace. they bring out the worst in his mind. all they do is remind him of the neverending cycle that he has trapped himself in — wake up, work, go to sleep, and do it all over again the next day.

mondays bring a lot of things he fundamentally dislikes, but this particular monday also brings you. 

it’s split-second eye contact. nothing more, nothing less. your eyes grow wide, your lips parting just the slightest bit in surprise. though he has not invaded your mind (yet), he can already tell what you are thinking. fuck, he isn’t blind — he knows that he is handsome.

your eyes shoot downward, your head hanging low with your phone clenched between your fingers. one of his eyebrows raises while a small smirk plays on his lips — you’re new, and even better, you’re cute. his dark, seemingly bored gaze trails over to the earbuds nestled in your ears, then to your crossed legs. you glance up at him again, eyes blowing wide again as your thighs press together just enough for him to notice the movement. his own eyes narrow slightly, evaluating the sight. 

you seem...interesting. prim, proper, sitting in a modest-length skirt and a plain blouse and coat that paint you as an unassuming character, just another random person in this sardine can of a train car. yet there’s this glint in your eyes that tells him there is so, so much more to you than what meets the eye — that the innocent, put-together little front that you display to the world is a complete and utter lie. it’s intriguing. new patrons come and go from this particular subway car every day, but you and your fresh face have caught his interest — and so has your odd behavior. 

then, without warning, realization punches him square in the gut.

you were there the other night, with those girls at the bar. the one sitting at the end of the table with the small glass of water as you scrolled through your phone. the one who shot a piercing glare at him as you looked out for your inebriated friends. your current behavior is a far cry from the strong front he first encountered that night, small and oh-so meek and lacking the sharp, piercing edge to your gaze that initially piqued his interest in you. the change, for some reason, intrigues him more. what happened to that feisty glare, that confident air to your posture? he wants to know why you seem so meek, so he taps in to your mind and—

“you’re my dumb little slut, aren’t you? fuckin’ say it—”

beomgyu flinches in his seat, the door to your mind slamming shut as he sits there in shock. did he really just hear that? are you listening to fucking porn on the subway? what the fuck?

he’s never had this happen to him before. he’s accidentally stumbled upon the occasional horny thought before, sure, but listening to porn on the subway? that’s a new one. he decides to give you another glance; your lips are pressed together now, eyes pointed towards the floor as you further shrink into yourself. fuck, you’re so cute, but now he knows you’re also awfully perverted — and for some reason, he feels himself getting hard in his trousers at the thought of entering your mind again.

he should do something about this little development, shouldn't he?

again, if you would like to be tagged, shoot me an ask or comment down below!! and if you'd like to join my permanent taglist, please do so through this form!

© to agustdiv1ne. do not copy, repost, steal, and/or translate.

[vodika-vibes]

Hello!! Happy 800 followers! I love the fall-themed asks and I'd love to ask for going camping with Sergeant Hunter. I can just imagine the man all decked out in flannels as you admire him chopping the wood for your fire 😍😍😍😍 and he has to hold you close while the others tell spooky stories around the Campfire likeyado.

~jedipoodoo

By The Fire

Summary: If you’re honest with yourself, you only agreed to go camping with the boys and Omega because you wanted to spend time with Hunter, not because you enjoy camping. But, you can’t help but think that maybe Hunter will make you enjoy it.

Pairing: TBB Hunter x F!Reader

Word Count: 874

Warnings: None

Prompt: Camping

A/N: So, I want to say that I have been camping a grand total of once in my life, and I was miserable and cold the whole time. Give me a hotel with climate control, hot water, and WiFi and I'm a happy vod'ika. Anyway, I hope you like the story!

Click HERE to be added to my taglist

“You look bored out of your mind, mesh’la,” Hunter notes, amusement in his voice, as he takes a break from chopping wood to check on you, “If you want to go swimming with Omega and the others you can, I won’t be offended.”

You scrunch your nose up, “Hard pass. Besides, I’m not bored at all.”

“Yeah? Because you look it.”

“I’m not bored because I’m spending time with you.” You counter with a sniff.

The look Hunter shoots you is so affectionate that you feel your face heat with slight embarrassment. It isn’t fair. Hunter is insanely attractive on a normal day but, with his hair pulled into a tail and wearing a flannel shirt, he’s even more appealing.

Honestly, you’ve been dating the man for half a year, and he still gets you all flustered like you’re a schoolgirl. And he knows it too.

“Mesh’la, do you even like camping?”

“I don’t think anyone actually likes camping,” You reply, “They just pretend to like camping because that’s what other people pretend. It’s a vicious cycle.”

He laughs and sets the axe down against the stump he’s using to cut wood to walk over to you. Hunter sets his hands on your shoulders, then slides his hands down your arms to hold your hands and then he kneels at your feet. 

“You didn’t have to come, mesh’la. Even though I invited you—”

You shake your head, “I don’t mind being here, Hunter. Sure, I don’t love camping, but I do love you.”

A small smile crosses his handsome face, and he releases one of your hands so he’s able to reach up to cup your face. You press your free hand over his and rub your cheek into his hand.

“I love you too, you know that?” Hunter whispers to you like he’s sharing a secret.

“We’ll, you have made it pretty obvious.” You reply, turning your head to press a light kiss to the palm of his hand.

“Good,” He tugs you in so he can brush his lips against yours, a hint of passion behind the chaste kiss, and when he pulls away there’s a familiar look on his face.

You don’t bother to muffle your amused laugh, “Regretting the camping trip yet, babe?”

He huffs out a breath, “Never. Course, I might change my mind tonight—”

You laugh again and swiftly press a kiss against his jaw, “Well, we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. We do still need more wood though.”

“Alright, alright. I hear you.” Hunter steals one last kiss and then disentangles himself from you so he can go back to chopping wood.

Later, after Hunter starts the fire and gets everything set up around the fire, and after dinner has been cooked and eaten, you find yourself on Hunter’s lap, your head tucked into his neck, and his arms secure around you.

Omega is in the process of making s’mores for herself and is cheerfully hoarding all of the chocolate and marshmallows, while eagerly listening to Echo’s scary story. Crosshair is lounging in a hammock, and you’re pretty sure he’s still awake, though you can’t really tell from where you’re sitting.

Wrecker is cooking some more burgers for himself and Tech, and Tech is sipping on a bottle of mead while listening to Echo as well.

As for Hunter. He’s wrapped around you as best as he can with you sitting on his lap. Now and then he drops a light kiss on your cheek or forehead, and he traces small shapes against the small of your back, making you shiver.

All in all, it’s not a bad way to spend the evening. 

And, grudgingly, you find yourself not all that upset that you have to sleep on the ground. You still don’t love camping, and you probably never will, but being here with Hunter makes you enjoy it a little more than you did when you were a kid.

Hunter shifts slightly, so his lips brush against your ear, “Still awake, mesh’la?”

You hum quietly in response, your arm sliding around his neck.

“I know you’re not the biggest fan of scary stories,” Hunter murmurs against your ear, “Do you want me to stop Echo?”

You shake your head, “They’re having fun,” you bury yourself closer to him as a cool breeze makes you shiver, “And I have you to keep me safe from the Boogey Man.”

He chuckles and kisses just under your ear, before he grabs a stray fleece blanket from nearby and drapes it over the both of you, taking care to tuck it around you securely. “Better?”

“Mm, who goes camping right before Winter?” You grouse under your breath, though there’s no heat in your voice.

“Me, so I have a reason to have you share my sleeping bag.” Hunter replies smugly.

“You have no shame.”

“None whatsoever, not when it comes to you,” Hunter confirms as he shifts to get more comfortable while tugging you so you’re more comfortable too. 

Your eyes drift shut to the sound of Echo’s storytelling, the feel of Hunter’s warmth all around you, and the bone-deep surety that you made the right choice, all those months ago, when you asked Hunter on a date.

@imabeautifulbutterfly

@n0vqni

@bad4amficideas

@justiceandwar98

@mira-loves-star-wars

@tiredbi-peach

@dukeoftheblackstar

@trixie2023

@kimiheartblade

@padawancat97

@falconfeather23435

@etod

@bb8-99

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@continous-mistakes

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@cdblake1565

@sweater-sloot

@heidnspeak

@wax-birds

@silly-starfish

@lonewolflupe

@clonethirstingisreal (tagging you because it's Hunter)

[alwritey-aphrodite]

tasm peter with

• one character covering the other with a blanket when they fall asleep watching a movie on the couch

+ forehead kisses and maybe reader wakes up and pulls him in for cuddles?

I didn’t follow the prompts super closely because the muse had me in her grasp so I hope this is ok :)

Let’s all pretend this isn’t literally 4 months late…

Sleep is never something that has come easily to you. You’re either too hot or too cold, wired up or unable to get comfortable, with most nights consisting more of your flopping around than actually sleeping. It’s been this way as long as you can remember, so you’ve learned to live with it, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t irritate you constantly.

“That much caffeine could kill a horse,” Peter jokes as you pop the tab on your energy drink. Most days, you try to limit your caffeine, but you’ve been getting less than five hours of sleep for the past week and you’re nearing desperation. You feel sorry for Peter, the sweetest boy imaginable having to deal with you and all your irritability, but he still presses a kiss to your cheek as he leaves the kitchen.

“It’s like I’m cursed or something,” you complain after taking a long pull from your can, relishing in the carbonation. You’re sure Peter’s tired of your grousing, but he still listens to every grumble, nodding sympathetically at your exhaustion.

“Maybe we can watch a movie later, it’ll help you relax even if you don’t sleep,” he suggests, and you know how much this kills him, knowing you’re uncomfortable and tired and upset all the time and not being able to do anything about it. He’s suggested everything to you, going out and buying supplements and sleep aids and blackout curtains just to try and see if they help you sleep even an hour longer. It melts your heart every time, almost as much as it breaks your heart seeing his disappointed frown when you tell him it didn’t help. You’re just waiting for the crash, knowing that soon enough your body will lose its fight and you’ll sleep soundly for a few nights, only for the cycle to start all over again.

“I’ll stop and buy snacks on my way home,” you respond, if only to see the way his smile lights up his entire face. You always think he looks beautiful, whether he’s laughing or crying or anything in between, but something about his smile makes him ethereal, and you do your best to make him smile as much as possible with the selfish motivation of ogling him just for a moment.

When you finally make it to the end of the day, exhaustion weighing you down like a ton of bricks, you make sure to pick up Peter’s favorite snacks, almost certain he has one of your favorite movies all queued up for your return. Upon your return, you’re a little shocked at the way he’s transformed your living room into your own home theater, making good use of the blackout curtains he’d bought and piling your couch with more pillows and blankets than two people could possibly need. He’s lit candles all throughout the room, casting a warm glow and just enough light for you to see the takeout spread across the coffee table, which with the snacks you’d bought, is almost more food than necessary.

In the gentle glow, you see him waiting for you, bringing your favorite drink out from the kitchen. You’re sure your relief is palpable, certain he can see the way your shoulders relax and your breathing settles, just a bit, at how wonderfully relaxing he’s made your apartment and how excited you are to finally be home. You set the snacks down, arranging them on the coffee table to compliment the takeout, and Peter shakes his head when he sees the spread, as if you’re ridiculous for buying his favorites when he must have spent hours making the living room as comfortable as possible.

You’re vindicated when the opening credits to one of your favorite movies rolls, and sitting next to Peter under your mountain of blankets, eating your favorite food with your favorite boy by your side, you’re more relaxed than you’ve been in weeks. A few minutes in, with a full belly and tired feet, your eyes start to feel like lead, and it takes more energy than you have to keep them open. Despite the pile of pillows, your head slumps against Peter’s shoulder, and he’s far too caring, far too relieved to see you asleep, that he wouldn’t ever dare to move.

It’s an awkward angle, but he presses a kiss to your forehead anyway, sweet and featherlight in an attempt not to wake you. He winces when you stir, eyelids fluttering, but you settle quickly, and he resists the urge to sigh in relief, certain the movement would only wake you.

You sleep through the night, and even though Peter’s lost feeling in his left arm and it seems like his neck has a permanent crick, he’d do it all again in a heartbeat.

[nortsauce]

HERE COMES NORT, YAPPING ABOUT FANDOMS THAT I’M NOT EVEN IN!

(And i’ll be typing the rest here because there are too many slides so read bellow)

⚠️ WARNING ⚠️

My LONG ASS rant on how MHA (among other things) fails to present its ab*se victims in a good way,

Starring the todoroki family

So, i know literally no one cares but i feel like it needed to be said: but MHA has a BIG issue with victims of abuse being treated kinda shittily, to making whole arcs about their abusers.

This isn’t a HUGE thing, as the lack of sympathy for Hawk’s abusers was definitely there, but they still were portrayed in a semi-sympathetic light. This is not the main focus however.

I’m sure many could go on and on about Bakugou and Midoriya’s relationship, but thats not what i’m focusing on.

I’m focusing on the most OVERLOOKED and ABHORRENTLY handled dynamic of the Todoroki family

I will be going over each of the characters and why they suck in some way, but as a whole i have to talk about this: Each one of the characters of the family are all victims of abuse in some way, and represent the different ways that trauma affects the victim, i understand that.

All in all, they do a good job of portraying the different ways in which the people handle abuse,

Endeavor being one who never dealt with his past egotistical superiority complex and threw his baggage onto his family/children to live vicariously

Rei being the one who is emotionally/physically damaged to the point of a mental break

Touya being the ex-golden child, and the one who continued the cycle of violence (and misogyny but thats another topic for another paper)

Fuyumi being the one who holds onto an idealized version of a family that possibly only existed in her dreams, being codependent and longing/working to get those “happy times” back with her family, clinging onto smth that was possibly never there

Natsuo being the one who is (justifiably) angry at his abusers, cuts his family off and goes to pursue his own life/dreams

and finally shoto

the one who realizes his role as the golden child is only for his parents to live vicariously, breaks his cycle and is trying to figure out who he is.

These are all great representations of how people cope/handle trauma, and i believe that was on purpose, considering that it also speaks on abuse of children on baselines of being in a famous family.

However, certain aspects are clearly not handled properly; allow me to explain.

Shoto, the youngest of the family, is often seen as the architect of the abuse, as the family was actually quite “fine-living” (i’ll come back to this) before shoto was born.

There were obviously cracks in their family from the beginning, Touya being the golden child despite not being able to physically handle his own power without hurting himself (an allegory i’ll discuss), the fact that Enji (endeavor) basically bought his way into marrying Rei, and of course enji’s complex of being less than All-might.

However, many characters seem to blame the birth of Shoto for breaking the camel’s back, and starting the domestic violence that had already threatened to spill through.

It’s shown through the anime that shoto has a kind heart and never liked enji, due to the fact that he would harm him, his siblings, and his mother,

but for being the tritagonist of this show, we never get to see how he really feels. In all of this, perhaps we could see him feeling guilt for being the reason his family is broken, the possible resentment yet dependency he has for his father, the thoughts on how he feels conflicted yet guilty about his mother and continues to blame himself.

Its interesting how he never stops blaming his father, but regardless we only get his apathetic views on his father and no one else. Its saddening to see the sideline of the victim of abuse while his abuser gets a whole arc. But i’m not there yet.

Moving on we have Natsuo and Fuyumi. I grouped them together because they both have opposite ways of dealing with their trauma, as Aforementioned: Natsuo tries to cut all ties while Fuyumi tries to be a “normal” family with her remaining members.

Both of them have valid ways to why they act this way, and its tragic, however, the way they deal with their youngest sibling, shoto, is disheartening to say the least.

Both of them understand how Shoto was physically abused since he was 5, and neglect to form any sort of connection with him despite his better efforts in natsuo’s case, using him as leverage against his father and nothing more, while in fuyumi’s case, basically presents him in her fantastical version of him in their fantastical “perfect” family life, causing him to have multiple meetings with his abuser and forcing him to relive the trauma so she can have peace of mind.

In hindsight, this is all interesting heavy topics to explore in a character, and i was honestly curious to see how it would be handled

however it all faltered as soon as I saw the hospital scene.

SPOILERS:

After Dabi’s Dance, the todoroki family comes to visit Shoto and Endeavor in the hospital, both of whom are heavily bandaged and bed-ridden.

Despite this all, Rei, Fuyumi, and Natsuo force todoroki, who is burnt and recovering his voice, to get up and walk over to his father’s ward to speak to him.

Shoto, despite being unable to form full sentences, makes it FULLY CLEAR he does not want to be there, by closing the door to his ward, and attempting to leave. Despite his clear efforts, his family makes him go in to talk to him.

this 16 year old boy being forced out of RECOVERING, fully bandaged and barely able to talk, forced to visit his abuser to hear him cry about not being able to fight his own son, depsite also being his son and physically harmed by him since childhood.

In my opinion that wasn’t a good move on any of the family’s part.

Rei is a difficult subject to discuss. She is clearly a victim and has been for. while. She is mentally distant after being harmed for so long and spent time in a psyche-ward to handle herself.

Saying that she was a bad mother would be too far in my opinion, as she did her best to provide a nice life for her kids as well as defend them from her husband.

Not much is said about her, but from what we can tell she loved her kids very much, until the abuse started.

I feel the blame for shoto began with her, not being able to face her own son after the “death” of her first and the fact that his face reminded her of the abuse she’s faced from endeavor.

Her character is honestly an interesting one, but she is not safe from my scrutiny of the hospital scene. She was very brave for facing her abuser like this, however, she did not have to drag her bedridden youngest into the fray.

She is the DIRECT reason shoto has a scar on her face, (indirectly endeavor’s fault)

But i will never blame her for the abuse she faced for her children, by her husband and to an extent, her own son touya, which leads me into my next point

SPOILERS

Touya, aka Dabi, is the ���Late” eldest brother who was originally Endeavor’s ticket into living vicariously to defeat all-might and be the number 1 hero.

I could go into the psychology of his character but he is ultimately very interesting. In all honesty the way he is presented as being the consequences of endeavor’s actions is palpable and honestly quite raw. At a young age, he was handling the pressure of being his father’s perfect creation, and the fame and fortune that followed as he sought his father’s approval. Soon, his quirk began to burn him every time he used it, a fact that endeavor ignored to pursue his goal. Touya’s power became self-harm at some point, an allegory for his disregard for his own life and well-being for his father’s dream which ultimately (literally) exploded on itself.

Touya’s story is interesting, from his abuse causing him to act like his father craving his approval, which lead him to act put against his mother and shoto, while laying his baggage onto his younger siblings, to losing his mind and realizing that he wanted his father dead and continuing the cycle of abuse further.

This is all a deep and interesting way to look at abuse and how the abused may become an abuser, HOWEVER.

MY critique here, is how sidelined his whole arc is, as his story is more portrayed of Endeavor’s past coming to haunt him, all for the watcher to sympathize with endeavor rather than understand how the abuse endeavor put onto touya made dabi. This whole arc was framed to be sympathetic towards endeavor, and to fear Dabi. Don’t even get me started on how Shoto’s feelings meant nothing in this arc, as well as being immediately cut off by a surprise cameo of a character that possibly discredited Dabi’s expose video on his abuser.

Finally, we get to talk about the elephant in the room: Enji Todoroki, endeavor himself.

What is there not to say about this man.

I feel I should start eith the obvious:

The forgiveness/sympathy arc for endeavor was quite possibly the worst thing to ever happen in the anime, and this is not subjective.

The whole arc is based around how Endeavor is a victim of his own mind and is trying his hardest to make up for being a terrible person.

Personally, i love to see character arcs of villains becoming a better person, but thats the very thing: Endeavor is trying to ask for forgiveness from his family, who he abused for 15 YEARS. This is no exaggeration as Shoto is now 16, and his cracks started forming as soon as he was born.

Endeavor had illegally married a woman that he basically bought his way into,

was illegally “breeding” (eugh) for quirk benefits,

Treated one of his son’s like a vicarious version of himself

Physically abused his son (age 5+) his wife, and verbally abused the rest of his children

isolated his son

treated his son like a weapon

and finally felt too prideful for any sort of meaningful apology.

This all adds up to a character who only felt sorry for his actions after the consequences started hitting him in the face, as he only felt remorseful when Shoto refused to be associated with him.

Now, some of you may be thinking: “A lot of characters are forgiven for more, why would he be the exception? It’s fictional why do you care?”

There are several reasons to why I care but i’ll speak in terms of framing for now. This show is highly influential to not only kids (as it is a KIDS SHOW) but to adults as well. May i direct your attention to the man who saved a woman from a murderous ex-boyfriend by blocking his machete hits all because My Hero Academia inspired him to take action and be a hero?

Or how about a murder that took place because the accused was inspired by an invader zim episode (the dark harvest)

Whether you like it or not, fiction HAS an affect on reality. Yes, we can determine what is real and what is fake, but you cannot deny that a lot of what media we consume helps us be who we are.

If the show promotes more sympathy towards an abuser than their victims, then people may find themselves sympathizing real world abusers over the voices of victims.

I wont speak on delicate subjects but I can already see affects of this happening, as people rally to defend famous people accused of being abusers rather than listen and provide support to the alleged victims.

In conclusion, These topics are definitely not easy to write, and I, for one, am NO expert and my word should not be used as gospel truth or a guideline on how to write these characters.

This is all simply my opinion on how the bias towards abusers in the show leads for the message to be skewed and marred in action.

I understand that no one is perfect, but if we only reward and sympathize with those who only seek redemption after they face scrutiny, then we lose the meaning of what makes someone worthy of forgiveness.

These topics are deep and interesting, but the way they are handled in this show is simply bad writing.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk and again: no shade towards the writers. Just critiques!

[hellodaydream1111111111111111]

Okay so here’s some more of my Ted talk, Illumi’s (one sided) relationship with Killua.

Illumi loves Killua but it’s deeper than that he’s obsessed with him, I think he loves Killua as a brother sure but he’s also jealous of Killua. Killua has everything Illumi could ever want and more. Their entire family adores Killua he’s their golden child, he’s the next heir to the family, his dad doesn’t get mad at him for breaking the rules he actually encourages it as long as he fulfills his purpose; to be the heir. In the Zoldyck family praise and attention is one of the many problems, if you stand out from the rest of your siblings you get the most attention. It’s a be the best get the best mentality so the kids are encouraged to push themselves, do whatever it takes just to be better than your siblings. I don’t wanna say it didn’t apply to Killua but he had so much potential that he didn’t have to try. Illumi had to try see this through the story in the Hunter exam for example Illumi sits at the front, he sits up straight he pays attention he does his best. Killua is also able to stand up to his parents, all the Zoldycks have been conditioned to blindly trust their parents but Killua breaks free of that. Illumi wasn’t able to do that.

Illumi understands why Killua is going to be the heir but it still makes him jealous, however he is unable to recognize his feelings as jealousy and perceives them as love. It’s not only that he is jealous of Killua he genuinely wants to be Killua but, he can’t so he tries to do the next best thing; control Killua. It doesn’t work so he uses nen. Illumi is so deep in his rabbit hole of hatred, jealousy, love, admiration and expectation. He loves Killua because he is his brother, he hates Killua because everyone loves Killua and Killua didn’t have to earn it, he’s jealous of Killua because he is everything he wants to be and he’s expected to love and train Killua, he’s expected to not have these other feelings.

Killua escaped the hell that his the Zoldyck mansion but Illumi didn’t. Killua isn’t fully broken down yet, in the Hunter exam Killua has the same feelings towards Gon. He wonders why everyone likes Gon because he’s not as strong as Killua but for some reason they all love him but Killua also likes him because he was nice to him, because he’s a good person. Killua and Illumi are actually very alike and Killua knows this. Illumi is also

The Zoldyck family dynamic is rooted in the characters trauma, it’s a cycle. Milluki is part of it however he is not as present because he recognizes he doesn’t like Killua.

The parents messed up Illumi and Milluki because that’s what they were told to do by their parents. (Okay new thought on this, Kikyo had Illumi at 18 and since she wasn’t born into the family she probably had to undergo training as well and that’s why she’s such a suffocating mother, she wanted to prove herself to the Zoldycks so she did the training would be my assumption anyway so I’m assuming she is also a victim but she still messed the children up bad along with her crap husband)

Illumi messed up Killua by not understanding his own emotions because the parents messed him up.

Killua messed up Alluka ( and Kalluto indirectly) by abandoning her, it was the best option but it still probably gave her abandonment issues.

And Alluka messed up Kalluto by being Killuas favorite. (It was not her fault more Killuas but Alluka is who Kalluto blames.)

Illumi is also jealous of Gon but he can recognize that because Gon isn’t related to him, he isn’t supposed to love Gon so he can hate him.

Illumi cannot be the Zoldyck heir because his nen is specifically made for manipulation and quickly killing something yes he can fight but it’s easily countered, Killuas nen is more broad and has a lot more uses in terms of he can fight a lot more opponents with a better chance of winning, Illumi it a very strong manipulator proved by Shalnark who says that a manipulator can’t use their nen if they don’t have their object (Illumi’s needles) which we see Illumi do York new when turning into Hisoka.

Anyway therapists in Hunter x Hunter are working overtime.

The Zoldyck family dynamic is so sad and I mean you can see it on the surface but going deeper into it, it just gets worse. I want to make it clear that NONE of the Zoldyck children are to blame they do not know any better and that Alluka didn’t do anything it’s just the way Kalluto perceives it. This doesn’t excuse what they’ve done but it makes sense of it at least.

Ps—

if anyone wants to make a hate squad for Kikyo and Silva I’m totally down.

Pps-

let me know if I missed anything

[infiniteeight8]

Hello! Before anything else, just wanna say: thank you so much for sharing so many amazing fics and ideas!

I just read "Entertain Me" over on AO3 and (if it works out - absolutely no pressure) would be interested in seeing a part 2 that covers the "Tony does him best to charm Stephen into forgiving him later" moment.

Hope you have a great day!

Hey there! Thank you so much! 😀 I’ve gotten so many lovely comments, from you and from others, and I hope everyone knows how happy it makes me that people enjoy these ficlets so much. ❤️

This follow up is less charm and more communication and apologies. I know the original prompt said charm, but something about that feels insincere to me so we’re going this way instead. It’s also going to be pretty mutual—the more I thought about it, the more I felt like they both had apologies to make.

The first ficlet can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60103798

-

Stephen is gone for a week. His absence, in the wake of walking out of the benefit, has only fueled the tabloids. When opens a portal into the penthouse living room, Tony looks up from pouring a drink. “If you meant to wait out the news cycle, you’ve mistimed it,” Tony turns back to the drink, giving it a stir before setting the stir stick aside. “The tabloids are still speculating about a possible break up.”

“I don’t actually enjoy being away,” Stephen says, closing the portal. He leans against the couch and looks at Tony expectantly.

Tony knows what he’s waiting for. “I’m sorry I ignored you.”

Stephen raised an eyebrow. “And?”

That takes Tony a second. He purses his lips. He doesn’t want to argue, but… “I’m not apologizing for worrying about the tabloids.”

“You made me feel like an accessory,” Stephen says flatly. “Like your convenience and your image mattered more than our relationship. Like I was interchangeable with anyone else marginally interesting.”

Tony winces, but he’s not going to back down. “I need to explain this better.” Stephen waits. Tony sighs and downs his drink, setting the glass aside. “When the tabloids get ahold of something juicy,” Tony says, “it’s not just me who is affected. Like it or not, my name reflects on Stark Industries. The past week has been shitty for me, yeah, and I deserved it. You know who didn’t deserve it? The PR team that has been running damage control all week. The departments that delayed press releases because they’d be lost in the noise. The investors whose stocks took a two point dip.”

Stephen is frowning now. “I can’t stop and think about how the press will react every time there’s a bump in our relationship.”

Tony’s heart clenches. “Stephen, if you can’t consider the press, we can’t have a relationship.” Stephen shoots him an alarmed look. “I’m not saying I can do whatever I want and you have to suck it up,” Tony barrels on. “And I’m not saying the press reaction trumps everything. But you have to be able to consider it. You have to be able to remember that if you need to yell at me, you yell at me in private.”

Stephen lets out a long breath and comes over to the bar, fixing himself a drink. “I’m more than your entertainment,” he says after a minute.

“Yeah, you are,” Tony says. “And that’s new for me. I’m sorry for treating you like arm candy. Like you were disposable. I want to promise that I won’t do it again. But honestly? That’s some pretty ingrained behavior. It’s going to take work to break it.”

Stephen looks up from his drink and catches Tony’s gaze. “But you’re willing to put in that work?”

“I am,” Tony promised. He ventures a smile. “You’re worth it.”

“You’re worth the press crap,” Stephen returns, and Tony feels a wave of relief. More than a few people have decided he isn’t.

[artydonsgf]

I loveeeed your patrick enemies to lovers headcanons. Do you think you could do something with patrick as a husband or dad? It’s not something we see at all in the movie, but I think it could be cute!

hiii thank you sm!! i was already planning on writing husband patrick n dad patrick so im happy that someone wants it! here you go sweets, enjoy!

Patrick Zweig as a Dad

- when he finds out he’s becoming a father, he’s tweaking

- it’s not because he doesn’t want the baby, it’s more fear that he won’t be a good dad

- warms up very quickly and is very giddy

- tells random people at the grocery store that he’s gonna become a dad

- would shout it from the rooftops if he could

- has no clue what anything means at all

- just happy to be there tbh

- never misses appointments, he’ll finish a game then haul his ass across town for your appointment

- yes he’s a little sweaty and yes he’s a little stinky but he’s there! and excited!

- when he finds out you’re having a little boy, he’s very excited

- he wouldve been happy with either but he’s excited at the idea of having a son

- i feel like patrick never really had a good relationship with his own father and he wants to create a new cycle with his little boy

- doesn’t let you carry anything towards the last trimester

- it’s sweet at first but now you’re annoyed because he’s holding your water to your mouth because the glass might drop n break on your stomach

- he doesn’t really believe that but any excuse to be close to you and have a hand on your stomach is good enough for him

- your baby brain isnt a problem because he’s thought of everything

- leave your keys somewhere? don’t worry, he’s made three copies (n it’s not because he’s also lost his keys)

- when your water breaks at 3 pm on a wednesday, he’s somehow a complete mess

- he has no clue where the fucking keys went n now he’s mad at himself because he copied three separate copies for this exact scenario

- tripped and ate shit over your hospital bag after not being able to find it

- now he’s hobbling to the car with a sore chin before he realizes the car isn’t starting

- calls art screaming and despite how completely intelligible he sounds, art is there with a ride in five minutes

- now that the birth is actually here, he’s all freaked out again

- he’s holding your hand and despite trying to comfort you, it feels more like you’re comforting him

- after a small pep talk from art who might’ve smacked him (gently), he marches back in there with his head on straight

- baby boy comes very quickly and patrick has the honor of catching him

- he’s crying and sniffling and laughing

- hands baby to you through tears

- stays awake for two whole days and just stares at the life you created together

- you catch him with a dopey grin on his face a million times

- once yall are able to go home, he asks you if he did the “hot dad walk” right (he did research)

- safe to say he def did

- once you’re home, you sleep like a dream

- patrick has made it his mission to let you rest and he stays true to that mission

- unless it’s bonding time or feedings, you are dead asleep and healing and patrick is running around n doing everything, household chores n cooking included

- as baby boy grows up, patrick is the best dad in the world

- he has him try every activity ever n when baby boy settles on wanting to do theater, patrick is the annoying dad who stands up at the end of the production whooping and hollering

- parenting style is very chill but one thing he doesn’t play about is his son showing respect

- if that boy ever dares to disrespect you or any other woman in his life, patrick is on it in an instant

- doesn’t hit or yell at baby boy, just uses stern words and reiterates that he loves him and he wants him to be a good person

- we love you dadrick

i hope yall enjoy mwah mwah mwah

[adrixivy]

hi ppl! so here’s a list that shows how much Tony actually cares about Peter. How Peter was so impressionable to him. (Not in movie order because I gave up doing that)

1. When Peter was absolutely spent in the fight in Civil War but he wanted to get back up, Tony asked if he’s okay and stopped him from continuing to fight. He didn’t want Peter to fight anymore as he knew Peter was tired and should probably rest.

2. There was an ad that had Tony and Happy. They were talking about a guest list and Tony wanted Peter to be invited. Happy was reluctant because he would have to take care of Peter but Tony still insisted because he said “Why do you hate fun?” He wanted Peter there because he is someone fun to be with and he actually enjoyed Peter’s company.

3. When they had that argument on the roof, Tony said “If you died, I feel like that’s on me” He said that because he made Peter’s suit. Peter was just operating in Queens and various parts of New York in his onesie suit but Tony made him an advance suit which can do so much more. He even gave Peter an A.I in the suit which is known as Karen. Peter simply wanted to be a friendly neighbourhood Spider-man at first but because Tony wanted his help in Germany, Peter felt like he could do so much more after that. Tony knew that and he felt like it was his fault if Peter got injured doing that so he tried making Peter stick to being a friendly neighborhood spider-man and just focus on the little guys.

4. When Tony saved Peter from drowning, Peter was cold as he sat on top some play area thing while he asked if Tony tracked him. Tony did and he just either happened to check on Peter’s whereabouts and see Peter in danger or got a notice from Friday that Peter was in distress and sent a suit to him. Not only was he able to track Peter’s location but also his vitals. He even installed a heater in Peter’s suit and warmed Peter up.

5. Peter was going after the Vulture and Peter removed the baby monitor protocol and the tracker. He was suddenly surprised with Karen and all the protocols that wasn’t accessible before. He was just made known to everything that Tony really put in his suit. Tony thought of everything that Peter could possibly need. Hell, he made 576 variations of webs for Peter! Even Peter was surprised. “Mr Stark really overdid it”. He definitely did.

6. When Peter was on the ferry ship, Tony called him out of nowhere to congratulate him on what Peter did in DC. “Nice work in DC. My dad never really gave so any support so I’m just tryna break that cycle” He was worried Peter would feel neglected and that his efforts wasn’t appreciated like what Howard did to Tony despite everything Tony invented or did. He didn’t want Peter to feel the same way he did so he wanted to tell Peter he did a good job.

7. When he found out what Peter was doing at the ferry, he called the FBI and even went there himself. Peter thought it was just a suit sent to save him but Tony was there himself. He came because he actually cared and we could see in his face when Peter said he didn’t care that he was actually hurt Peter said that.

8. When Peter was so high in the air that he couldn’t breathe, Tony immediately deployed the iron spider to catch him and send him home

9. Peter was not happy being sent home and snuck onto the ship. When he made his presence known, Tony was mad at him for doing so because he did NOT want Peter there. “Yeah, right where I didn’t want you to be!” He scolded Peter because he cared about him. “This isn’t Coney Island or a fieldtrip, this is a one-way ticket, you hear me?!” He didn’t want Peter to get hurt because this is space! Tony always had a bad experience with space(as seen in ironman 3) and he didn’t want anything to happen to Peter. He didn’t want Peter to possibly be tormented with horrible memories like he did and have panic attacks. In the end, he made Peter an Avenger and just simply let him tag along.

10. When Peter was turning to dust, Tony immediately went over to him and was speechless when Peter became dust. You could see his face was so devastated and the amount of guilt he had.

11. When Tony came back to Earth, the first thing he said to Steve was “I lost the kid”. He blamed himself for losing Peter.

12. This is something we all know. When Tony was cleaning up and he happened to come across a picture of him and Peter. As he cleaned the photo, he thought back to what Scott and Steve said. Time travel. He thought of Peter and that if he managed to invent time travel, he would be able to see Peter again. And he did. He invented time travel for Peter.

13. Tony immediately hugged Peter when he saw him. He was so glad to see Peter again and hearing Peter ramble.

14. After he died, he entrusted Peter all of his security protocols and more. The glasses, Edith. Edith is stand for ‘Even Dead, I’m The Hero’. Peter literally had access to Tony’s Global Security Network. He still worried about Peter and wanted to take care of him even if he’s dead so he left Edith to Peter. He literally entrusted all of his weapons, security protocols and information to Peter in case he needed help for something beyond him. He trusted Peter with mostly or infact everything.

15. In my first post, I said Tony Stark literally had multiple designs of suits for Peter. He wanted to make Peter multiple suits as he believed he could make more improvements for Peter

16. If you remember in Iron Man 3, the iron legion was deployed and Rhodey wanted a suit but Tony said all of his suits were only coded to him. Even the suit Rhodey had was military upgraded. He didn’t give his best friend a suit but made a suit coded specifically for Peter.

17. When Peter was recording a vlog at the start of homecoming, he asked Tony to say a few words. Tony didn’t have to but he said a lot of positive comments about Peter. He was talking about how much of a good job he actually did in the fight. “Wanted to tell you of how much of a wonderful job your nephew did, this weekend, at the Stark’s Internship Retreat. Everyone was impressed” Peter face was in disbelief because Tony added more after what should’ve been enough.

18. He took Peter’s suit because not only was he angered that Peter made adjustments to the suit and did things behind his back, he didn’t want Peter to be in danger and repeat the same incident that happened earlier.

19. At the end of homecoming, he apologized and said “Actually turns out, it was the perfect tough-love moment that you needed right?” He was doing it out of paternal love and care for Peter. That’s why he took away the suit, simply because he didn’t want Peter to get himself in danger. He even offered Peter to be an Avenger and showed him the Iron Spider suit. A nano-tech suit for Peter, a suit that was as advanced as Tony’s nano-tech suit.

20. He looked away from the list of people that wast lost due to the blip when Peter’s face appeared, guilty that he was the reason Peter was gone.

21. He was so relieved and in disbelief when he saw Peter come out of the portal.

22. Tony always second guessed everything he did. But he did not second guess Peter. In the note he left Peter, it wrote “For the next Tony Stark” He believed Peter could be better than him and trusted Peter so much.

23. Everything Peter told Tony and every pop culture reference he said to Happy or Tony he remembers. Like when Peter made a plan based on a movie called Aliens. Or when Peter told Happy about the woman giving him a churro he remembers. Or when Nick Fury gave him something and he said “He said you won’t know what I’m talking about unless its a Star Wars reference” He literally remembered everything about Peter’s Star Wars references

Well this is simply what I gathered. Feel free to add more if I missed anything!