#hating yourself
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a little story about hating yourself little monster
translation: there is a little monster that follows me wherever I go I see it in the mirror but little by little I'm noticing that hating it doesn't take me anywhere...
#comic#comic strip#original comic#comic art#original story#mental health#personal stuff#hating yourself#mental health struggles#original art#jolivira#so this is the first comic i finish#and im very proud of it#its also important for me to share this kind of story#a bit different than im used to posting here but#anyways
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whats the best way to recover after hating yourself so much and thinking so lowly of yourself for years along with the criticisms and shit you get from those around you that you dont feel like a real person anymore? i dont feel like me and when i try to look at any sorts of advice or kind words i cant take it to heart cause i dont feel like a human or person, cause i’ve been suppressing my mental issues and state around my parents as a defensive mechanism to avoid them getting upset or annoyed with me again, and my friends ignore my pleas cause they probably think im making them uncomfortable when im trying to be honest about my situation. im very lost here. also its very late and im just putting it out there. its okay if you dont respond i’ve had three other blogs ignore and overlook my asks in the past.
Hi, it's great that you're putting it out there, and that you're trying to get better. That's an important first step!
Unfortunately, a lot of people deal with a low self-esteem and hating themselves. It's not something that just goes away. I'm not a professional, so I would advise you to go to a therapist who can help you better.
Also, remember: It's a slow process. And things do get better with time. If loving yourself seems too much, focus on acceptance. Try to accept that you're doing what you can and that that's enough.
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I hate this child, I am now going to insult her.
Bro's feet looks like a South Park character. Bro is so fat she swallowed the earth, that's why she's wearing that dress.
Why you smiling with those godamn horse teeth. And tf are those plants, WEED!?!
That yes on your dress probably comes from your mom accepting the doctors offer for an abortion.
Now you're probably thinking "Wes WTF did this little girl do to you that makes you hate her?" And well that little girl is in fact me. So I guess I have to be thankful but at the end of the day she's locked in a part of my brain begging to re watch Pokemon sun and moon.
Remember to love who you are right now, cause hating yourself in the past is funny my fellow trans friends.
#transgender#transmasc#hating yourself#Lol be you were so confused for a minute when I was just insulting a random 7 year old#this is a shit post
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Just remember:
When you're tired of me, you'll find the girl of your dreams...
#poetry#heartache#depression#anxiety#borderline personality disorder#bipolar disorder#mental illness#hating yourself
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f6c4fe31f473d6c167d828460889cb30/fa4e4c050bb33d24-35/s540x810/12f3bb0eb93b5733947fc1ac19d7e1a2bc8932a6.jpg)
oh gee discord should I try adding numbers? should I try that???? should I try adding numbers to the end of my username so that it's individualized and only mine???? should I try adding numbers??????????
#discord#I hate this#congratulations you played yourself#we're at the exact place we were before only worse#thanks. go fuck urself
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I feel like this has to be said, since it’s becoming increasingly popular to be extremely rude to ppl and trash on their interests (especially on tumblr)
You can enjoy any media you like despite what losers on tumblr tell you that you should and shouldn’t enjoy, be it music, books, or shows and movies. If you’re having fun and enjoying yourself that’s all that matters, lame ass ppl on this site will try and make u feel guilty about what you enjoy and I think that’s stupid as fuck
Listen to pop, watch that popular show, read that book that everyone claims is bad. Who cares, ppl are way too obsessed with being different and unique that they’ll try and squash your interests and enjoyment to make themselves seem interesting
Bottom line, just treat people with kindness and don’t diminish their interests, it’s such a shitty thing to do
#tumblr#text post#like at the end of the day who gives a shit#listen to Taylor swift and Ariana Grande and all the pop stars you can think of#read that book that ppl seem to do nothing but hate on#why try and impress the lame ass ppl on here just be authentically and unapologetically yourself#just treat ppl with kindness at the end of the day#this is def getting no notes ppl have their heads too far up their asses with being rude to strangers
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no mercy 😭
#one piece won the poll and I wanted to draw smth nice and wholesome#but I hated the perspective process and the multiple characters were a pain so where did that bring me?#that's right; perspective and multiple characters in shtpost format#don't you just love it when you put too much pressure on yourself and the way to fix that is to draw smth silly#vibrant colours go brrrr#pls trust me when I say I like sanji#I mean look at him#one piece#strawhat crew#sanji#luffy#zoro#chopper#usopp#nami#nico robin#cyborg franky#o0kawaii0o
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i hate you "influencers", i hate you tiktok, i hate you "content creators", i hate you "unalive" and "s€x" and "dr/ügs", i hate you instagram, i hate you consumerism, i hate you family friendly, i hate you puritans, i hate you facebook, i hate you family vloggers, i hate you violating other people's privacy, i hate you modern day social media
#sjonnie.text#i just saw someone make a 50 SECONDS reel about combining movie genres and movies and it was scream and romance and it was 50 SECONDS and#they said “i'm sorry i unalived all those people” go actually fuck yourself.#IF YOU CAN'T SAY THE WORD MURDER KILL DRUGS SEX ETC YOU ARE NOT READY TO HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT THOSE TOPICS#AND SHOULD NOT PRODUCE CONTENT OF IT#i hate this “family friendly” aesthetic jesus fucking christ#text post#anti instagram#anti tiktok#anti influencers#anti capitalism#20k
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the thing is I already know that men and society at large hate women. I know that young men in particular increasingly skew right and towards misogyny (I've read the articles, although all I really need to do is spend any time on any part of the internet to see the evidence). but then every so often something like this happens where it still somehow surprises me. like my god.. they really hate us this much.
#also the thing that's supposed to be a glimmer of hope is that younger generations are more progressive#and you can tell yourself that as time goes on that will reflect in society#but when for example the exit polls suggest a massive discrepancy in young men vs young women voters#it feels like jesus what's the point these men in our own age category are just growing up learning to hate us#talking
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idaho is already moving to repeal same-sex marriage. they say it's an overreach of the governmental power, and that the law should be determined by "state's rights".
trump is expected to sign an executive order banning trans women in women's sports. in the article i've linked there, he notes that the "biggest hand" (most applause) he gets is when he attacks trans women. isn't that interesting.
i know my own father voted for him. my own father, radicalized by podcasts and bad youtube, voted for this; felt smug about it. he genuinely believes the dems want to "put christians in camps." as if the dems could ever get off their silken asscheeks and actually do anything. i wish they had strong enough messaging to be misattributed like this.
my girlfriend and i worked the polls on election day, counting ballots. my father was eating noisily beside us. "see? you're freaked out about nothing." after all, i live in massachusetts: beautiful, expensive, no-working-transportation MA. the only state to go all-blue.
"if it's state's rights, you'll be fine," he said. i'd been sworn at a few days before this. a year ago almost to the day, i got hit in the head with an empty beer bottle. he said i was being dramatic. after all, first-adopter "the gay state" Massachusetts would rather explode than get rid of same-sex marriage. so what should i care, after all.
this man is a deacon. i guess he expects me not to get out of the car in any red state. i guess he thinks my relationship dissolves across certain borders. he doesn't see why it's concerning that i can't leave, because why would i want to. who wants to go to idaho? who cares about the real, living, breathing people in idaho.
(but then again: who cares about the real, living, breathing humans on deportation planes. they're not us. after all, my father came here legally. i am an american citizen because of birthright citizenship. i am even debating this because he immigrated.)
i texted my mom about it. i feel sick. no matter how much activism and research and outreach i do: it's always shocking to see a room full of people who hate you so much that they take legal action against you. on my small ex-work-laptop, i watch the shaking hands of people in idaho begging their representatives to reconsider. the fear in their voice is palpable. no person should have their relationship threatened this way. the motion still passes, 46-24.
it's all just happening so fast. i feel i am pushing my hands through glass pieces, watching the cuts before i feel them.
people often reference "first they came for..." when stuff like this happens, and while that's fair - there's a very quiet part of me that always says they're already at your door, you complete idiot. the same force that governs trans women's bodies will also be used against cis women. the censorship about supposed "DEI terms" will also be used to stifle science in general.
it won't just be idaho.
#spilled ink#there's SO much happening and i do not attempt to cover even 1/100th of it here#i am not a news source. i am not a reporter. i am not a reputable resource for your research#i love you but every element of what he's doing is something you should be reading up on YOURSELF#just like i do.#sometimes in posts like this people will say ''you forgot''! and im like. i didn't. i just didn't cover it in THIS post#sometimes that's bc it deserves it's own post. sometimes it's bc i literally feel too sick to write about it.#sometimes it's because i don't think it's appropriate for an internet poet to comment on someone else's struggles.#i will say this again: i am a poet. not a news source.#i only know my own experience. & i am sick and broken and SO ashamed of my country#trans girls... trans women. im so fucking sorry. you were literally chosen bc hating you was the easiest crowdpleaser.#and meanwhile assholes will be like ''womens rights tho!!' and im like. girl they'll put dresscodes back in place bc of this.#once there is a legal determination of ''woman.'' we are so utterly and completely fucked.
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i know that when people say "hey we made it through the last four years! we can do it again!" it's usually because they're just trying to tell themselves it'll be fine because they're scared too so I don't want to be a dick about it but like. they didn't have a guy make a fucking nazi salute to a fucking cheering crowd in his inauguration on day fucking one eight fucking years ago. i mean not to damper down the optimism or nothing but. i feel like it's important to point out that it's not just going to be a Repeat of 2016-2020 All Over Again. it's probably going to be more like the Fucking Worst of it that we got in 2020 (or the 2021 Fucking Insurrection) will be the Starting Point for whatever the fuck happens next and we should. idk. plan for that
#i get that it's optimism and i get that it's lying to yourself to make it through the day but like#in order to prepare to try to keep ourselves and our communities safe we have to fucking understand how bad That Thing intends this to be#mine#donald trump#aka That Thing#us politics#iiiii fucking hate living in this goddamn country
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you really need to raise your standards for what's considered "a phrase" because if it only makes sense in the specific context of the post it was originally found in and it isn't repeatable in other situations, that's not a phrase that has entered the lexicon, that's just something someone said one time.
i started this thing last week i need all the posts i can handle
What doesn't alter your vocabulary may alter, or may have already altered, someone else's. This is not about adding to The General Lexicon - I have an entire tag for things that change this site as a whole, which has a higher bar; this is largely about novelty and humor. This is us curb-stomping whatever the fuck we want into the right form for our needs, whatever those needs may be, including altering aspects of the phrase to fit the necessary format or context. It's a linguistic shotgun.
its my fuckin blog bitch ill shit where i want
#vaps.ask#i use 'phrase added to inventory' to reflect that these are things that may change someone's personal lexicon or that already have#also everything on this site is something someone said one time.#also keep in mind i do not genuinely hate you anon. i'm just slightly flabbergasted that someone comes in#and critiques a gimmick blog that i started Last Wednesday#with clearly arbitrary guidelines and nominations#like...why do you expect quality. you're setting yourself up for failure here#it's a grab bag. a random draw
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Dazai, do you know about Pétrus? That night you left the organization, I opened an '89 bottle of it to celebrate. That's how fed up with you I was.
I've been thinking about this scene, and about how Chuuya in Storm Bringer seemed to consider himself beyond saving while simultaneously yearning for someone to do save him, and about his eventual resolve and commitment to the Port Mafia, and about how his fate ultimately opposes Dazai's.
#in other words: ''congrats on doing the thing i never managed to commit to. go fuck yourself.''#i do think chuuya celebrated that night#just not with... confettis and streamers and partying#if chuuya and dazai hate each other it's in large part because of how similar yet opposed they are. and so.#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs#bsd fanart#bsd chuuya#bsd nakahara chuuya#soukoku#skk#nawy's comics
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In the past, people in the Animal Crossing community would make fun of Tom Nook as a sleazy landlord. Since then, he's really rehabilitated his image as this 'heart of gold' businessman (he's the one who puts bells and furniture in trees for you to find! he adopted orphans! he donates to charity!), but New Horizons genuinely paints the most devious version of him.
He's successfully privatized settler colonialism: you pay HIM to move to a "deserted island" (which apparently the oceans in the AC world are just full of) and start a colony that he is directly invested in. At best he's running a weird vacation package scam (you arrive on the island with no money and in debt for "using his services"). At worst, he's using you to set up company towns. For god's sake, he literally has his own fake currency that he forces you to use to pay off your debt. But don't worry, he's repackaged it in a way that definitely doesn't sound like an MLM scam: the Nook Mileage Program!
You're no longer just his tenant or his temporary part-timer, you're his business lackey. The entire tutorial section of the game has you spending actual weeks running around completing tasks and doing hard labor to set up his colony. You're even tasked with preparing his properties and finding buyers for them. No, you aren't a tenant anymore. You work for the landlord. You are directly responsible for finding tenants for him. And he doesn't even fucking pay you. Not for setting up town hall and museum, or his nephew's shop –– which is the ONLY store on the entire island that sells necessities –– or bringing KK Slider to town, or helping populate his town. Not a single cent. No, actually, you have to pay HIM to BUY infrastructure like bridges and stairs and park benches. And all the while, he's telling you're the "resident representative"; you get to call the shots! That the reward is the community's progress. That what you're doing is in everyone's best interest (but most importantly, his).
Since NH's release, people have done a lot of legwork to say that Tom Nook isn't a capitalist while the game shows him at his very worst. He owns the only general store in town. You're forced to use a phone that he modified and branded as his own. Buy Nook-branded furniture and merchandise at the self-serve kiosk in the town hall, a governmental building! There's no conflict of interest here!
But hey, if you're tired of being the landlord/business mogul's goon, you can also find work as a deluxe resort home designer for a company that also pays you in their special company currency that can only be used to buy their products instead of a real salary! Because that's what the Animal Crossing franchise needs! More vacation homes!!!
#this is a really long winded way to say i really really really really hate new horizon's storyline and player role#i really hate that not only your house but the entire TOWN. the whole COMMUNITY you're a part of is owed to tom nook's business#i really hate the “vacation getaway package” angle because it shows just how commercialized the entire premise of nh is#and how lost the game is in its original core concept#animal crossing is about the experience of moving to a new town and becoming a part of that community#just to compare: all past ac games have a similar opening#you're on a bus or train or taxi to someplace new. a stranger strikes up a conversation and you get to know them before arriving#new horizons opens with you at customer service desk filling out an client application before a flight.#in prev games working for nook in the tutorial is meant to be demeaning. you want it to be over with so you can actually start living life#but in new horizons working for tom nook IS your life. and it's so rewarding! don't you feel rewarded?#you aren't a person. you aren't a new neighbor. you're tom nook's client. and then his unpaid employee. and the game insists it's fun to be#that's how void the game is#because it's bad enough that a rpg life sim got turned into a sandbox game where you have to build the town yourself#but the only reason why you're building it is because the landlord who you're in debt to TOLD you to build it.#everything is a rewards program! everything is a tour service! be sure to do your daily tasks to earn nook bucks to spend on nook merch!#that really sucks imo.#i mean. the entire game is based around the vacationing industry. of course it all feels fake and temporary. it's only a vacation.#long post#rant#not art#god the fact that your starter villagers can't even decide where to live you have to decide for them#i've never played a game that does the opposite of handholding#where instead it's the PLAYER who has to handhold the npcs through everything. and newsflash!! it's really exhausting and boring
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TW// Abuse implication
Thinking about possible Vox and Angel's interactions and how they'd go down. Theres such a unique mix of hatred to each other and common ground with their different experiences with Valentino, has me thinking.
Also just want to clarify I love Vox's character a LOT but ofc obv don't sympathise with him or think he is any way shape or form a decent individual, cant with stupid toxic dumbass x
AND IF YOU SEE ANY MISTAKES OR TYPOS NO YOU DONT- (i was so tired when drawing it forgive me TwT)
#Man though the ANGST potential!!!!#vox and angel are in such different situations#but they have one thing in common that keeps them really close#val#and like we all know vox is super jealous#even though vals a dick#i just think the way they would go about interacting is so so interesting#ALSO THIS IS NOT HATE TO VAL OR VOX i think they are really well written and I love how shitty they are#but also no apologizing for them either ygm? :>#SENDING LOVE AND KEEP YOURSELF SAFE OUT THERE. 🤍🤍#hazbin hotel#vox#angel dust#hazbin hotel vox#huskerdust#voxval#hazbin#hazbin hotel fanart#tribbleart#<3
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the dialogue choices in this game should be more diabolical
#i love akechi but i sometimes i wish you could bully him like no matter which dialogue u pick it sounds like ur flirting back w him#“i'm going to be completely honest with you. i've always hated you” why can't u say smt unserious back#like “sorry i have a snatched waist and correct opinions on everything.” or like “ur loss lmao”#hate playing darts with this bitch bc i play on a steamdeck and i don't have a fucking gyroscope so like#it's trying to replicate how the joycons or pro controller would throw AND ITS SUCKS SO BAD#like i just see akechi get a hat trick every single fucking time with three bulls in a row and meanwhile im struggling to line the thing up#and then after u finish he's like “hmm i see. that's an interesting way to play it” WHAT THE FUCK THERES LITERALLY NO STRATEGY HERE SMARTAS#I JUST MISSED. IM NOT STRATEGIZING. THERES NOTHING “INTERESTING” ABOUT IT.#i hate going to penguin snipers so much i hope i can get this stupid game on switch so i can actually rank up akechi's baton pass#and not waste like 1000 yen every night bc i refuse to not let a party member be on rank 3#akechi fuck yourself why can't we play 501 like we do with everyone else. why do u have to make everything abt this stupid rivalry#im gonna kms i hate akeci and i hate darts#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#goro akechi#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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