#hates networking and stuff but I mean like.. on a level most people could not possibly comprehend.. I am not just an 'introvert'. I am like

[icewindandboringhorror]

a quite simple outfit, trying to use the little blue and white apron thing (which is actually a dress I think, that I just leave un-buttoned in the back and added an apron-like tie to lol)

[f0point5]

controversial: Antonelli is overrated and nowhere near as good as Max is. everyone keeps sayin "yo, he's Verstappen re-born"... guys. this boy was held by hand by Toto Wolff since karting and his way to Formulas was cleaned from any stick or stone so he wouldn't God forbid stumble. Max had to fight it hard way, plus his dad obviously didn't make it any easier (not saying I hate Jos for that, I just don't agree with his parenting style). if Antonelli comes the next year to Merc because TW is so desperate to show everyone that he no longer cares he lost Max cause he made his own, the performance expectations from Antonelli will be so high that him being freshly eighteen, growing up in the pressure of social media... it will destroy him. this is the example of not rushing things otherwise you can damage them before they could show their full potential.

Well. WELL.

He is obviously nowhere near the level Max is now, but when Max entered F1? Idk, probably not, but also, you don’t have to drive like Max to be a phenom. Max was 1 in a million and maybe this kid isn’t as immediately polished, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the stuff to be an incredible driver.

I don’t know about Kimi’s karting record but by all accounts is extraordinary. No, he’s not setting the world alight in f2 but having watched some f2 this year I’m not about to base all my opinions on that.

It depends what you mean by Max didn’t have it easy. He didn’t have barriers to entry to the sport, he didn’t have parents who wanted anything different for him, he didn’t have parents who weren’t committed enough to drive him around Europe. He had a team of people around him from day 1 who grafted like hell for him and made sure he was not a victim of snake oil salesmen and people who wanted to make money off him or would have pushed him around. So no I’m not saying he had it easy from a personal development side but he did get to make racing his whole life from a very young age, and he had people around him who only had his best interests at heart. Not everyone has that. I can only hope Kimi has the same strong unit around him.

From what I understand, Max advanced as quickly as he did because however much he needed to do to win, Jos was pushing him ten steps further. Max learnt to ignore the noise because Jos was making most of it. It seems that Kimi has grown up differently. But let’s not forget that Kimi’s dad is also a racer, it’s not like he’s just been catapulted into the sport straight from Toto’s laboratory.

I don’t think having had Toto’s support and not having been forged in hellfire means his success or talent isn’t valid.

That being said, I do hope he has a good support network and they insulate him from the media chatter as much as possible. Because yes that will ruin him very quickly.

I think more than anything what will ruin him is not going to F1 too early, but going to the wrong team. I think those with talent will swim, because at the end of the day with enough testing you can learn how to drive the car and if you’re talented and you’re fast you’ll be fine. But what you don’t want is an 18 year old kid being pushed and pulled from pillar to post by a TP who expects a well rounded driver from day 1, and who will allow the kid to be brow beat by overzealous stewards and bullied by other drivers in track. Imo Toto will not stand up for a young driver in the way he will need to and that is what will damage a kid’s confidence and career prospects. So yeah, there’s an argument for leaving him in F2 until he’s had long enough to not make the mistakes that come with being an inexperienced driver. But I’m not sure if any amount of F2 can really prepare you, look at Logan (I could go on because my beef with f2 is REAL).

All this to say, I don’t know if he’s overrated. I think the comparison to Max is not helping him but it also doesn’t invalidate his potential. Max has really fucked the curve for young drivers I think. But I do think that the worry about ruining him is a bit uncharitable the way it’s often presented, especially in a climate where the fear around young drivers is really causing a bottleneck getting into F1. I think the right team wouldn’t ruin a real talent. I don’t think Merc is the right team but that’s just me.

[inimitablereel]

Pi-Hole debug log

I'm thinking about writing up a nice guide so let me know if that would be useful to anyone but in the meantime, some notes about difficulties I ran into setting up a pi-hole

First off, I do want to say that this is actually pretty technically complicated? Like it's been floating around tumblr for a while, lots of people have done it, you can too, but when OP on that viral post said they took 2 hours and don't know anything, I think they mean they don't know anything in the same way I do (I have a whole degree in computers I have used a terminal before, but I hadn't used a raspberry pi before)

Rest below the cut

Gathering Materials Good news: there's lots of viable options for a raspberry pi that works with pihole! The minimal requirements are really very minimal. You need some computer that you're willing to devote to blocking your internet. (Theoretically you could do this on a computer also used for different stuff but that would suck and make you have no ram.) In practice, unless you've got a spare working laptop floating around for some reason, you are going to want that to be a raspberry pi. Bad news: now you have to make decisions. The "official" pihole kit has been sold out for ages, so that's not an option. I said fuck it and bought kit for the raspberry pi 4 off of one of the licensed distributors linked from raspberrypi.com (because it had all the requirements) but that was ~$100 with shipping and there ARE cheaper options. It looks like the raspberry pi zero barely hits the RAM requirements and is $15 at a licensed distributor so that's likely as low as you can go. And if you're not just buying a kit you'll need at a minimum a power supply, a microsd card (the pihole requirement is 4GB but everything I was seeing was way bigger anyways), and a way to read a microsd card (either a USB microsd reader or if your laptop already has an sd card reader you'll need one of those microsd to normal sd card converters which idk where you get but a USB microsd reader is very cheap). You don't need but may want an hdmi cable that will connect to the pi

Setting Up and Using a Raspberry Pi You may notice for notes that aren't a guide (yet) this is going into Great Detail about the early parts of the setup. As someone who hadn't used a raspberry pi before, I found all the pihole guides I was looking at skipped the basics I needed and most of my setup time was trying to figure out what was going on with my raspberry pi, not actually doing the pi-hole thing. The raspberry pi getting started page actually had all the information I needed in conjunction with their pihole setup guide if I'd read it thoroughly enough but since I didn't a general overview: first you plug the sd card into your personal computer to image it; then once it's imaged you take it out and put it in your raspberry pi; then after it's blinked at you a bit you ssh to your raspberry pi while on the same wifi network you just set up in the imaging step. This is running your raspberry pi "headless" which means you don't need a monitor/hdmi cable but does make it harder to debug if you can't ssh. Also if you're on windows apparently you NEED to download a different terminal because windows command prompt for all that it's gotten better over time cannot connect to unix operating systems (which raspbian is).

AT&T hates internet configuration Now we're getting to the part that's specific to me. My internet is on AT&T, which has overall been pretty okay (and they've had great technicians for setup and repair), but AT&T fiber does not let you set your own DNS. The non-annoying backup is to make the pi-hole your DHCP server instead of your DNS server, which IS in every setup guide but is NOT very detailed. (Possibly if I wasn't on AT&T this whole paragraph would be complaining about the level of detail of guides about making your pi-hole your DNS.) To get DHCP working, I found a different, slightly outdated guide from someone else on AT&T fiber which was pretty useful but had some pitfalls because it is a bit out of date: https://otter-security.com/how-to/ht_post/28/

Key points for setting up a pihole as DHCP server:

Set up your pihole normally/following the raspberry pi guide for the prompts

You still need to allocate a static IP for your pihole. For AT&T, this is on the IP allocation of the Home Network tab of the advanced settings page. That static IP should be the same as whatever the IP the IPv4 one the pihole install configured.

Disable DHCP on the subnets & DHCP tab. THIS IS THE STEP THAT BREAKS YOUR INTERNET: without DHCP available only some sites will work. This will be fixed by enabling DHCP on the pi-hole

Disable IPv6 (more about this later)

Enable DHCP on the pi-hole admin page: this is just a checkbox under settings->DHCP. The router ip address should be the one listed on the back of your router/the one used to get to the advanced settings (probably already correct)

Let all devices connect to the pi-hole under Settings->DNS on the pi-hole admin page (this is the step that was outdated or possibly just different because it was wired on the guide)

Don't You Forget About Mesh More details about my particular internet setup: we extend our internet with a mesh network. This kept getting in my way as I was doing the setup because I treat them largely interchangeably but it's important to put the raspberry pi and your computer on the SAME internet to do a local ssh, where the mesh vs the router are different here. I wanted to put the raspberry pi ssh on the router not the mesh because my initial setup attempt did break the mesh, but I'm not sure that that matters? Also I don't think anything connected to the mesh is getting the pihole filtering right now? Possible fixes required are either changing the mesh DNS to the pi-hole IP or seeing if the mesh has DHCP enabled.

IPv6: Still Broken So in the DHCP setup step I disabled IPv6. I couldn't get my DHCP to be forced to the pi-hole on IPv6 and I'm not sure why. I did set up my pi-hole to be IPv6 enabled and try disabling just IPv6 DHCP on my router, but it didn't seem to be hitting the pihole. Reading a help thread on this has convinced me that my best option is to leave it disabled until such a time as I want to learn things about networking again (a class I liked but also worked very hard to get a B in)

Why is my computer sad?? So I've declared pihole "working" in that our internet isn't broken and it's blocking at least some ads from some computers... but my mac is now giving ominous no internet connection warnings.

This would be a Big Problem except that I definitely can in fact reach the internet just fine. I'm on the internet right now! I don't know why my mac is sad and I am struggling to google it because it's specifically a false warning and I'm only getting results about the real problem. My hazy guess is it's ipv6 related? I could test this by disabling pihole/re-enabling DHCP on my router while keeping ipv6 off... but not in the middle of the day on a Friday

Adguard vs Pi-Hole: A Mystery Pi-Hole is no longer new technology and in the ~12 hours that it's been set up here hasn't made a dramatic difference in my life, mostly because I already had adblockers on my laptop. You can add more blocked sites and I've been looking at finding more adlists, but one alternate option is instead of running pi-hole on your raspberry pi, you run a commercial network level adblocker called AdGuard Home. I haven't tried the AdGuard option but it might do more comprehensive blocking? On the downside, it's commercial, not open source, so I do worry about them switching to break your internet if you don't give them money...

[majorbaby]

very very long rant

when i first left tumblr after the porn ban, the sjw stuff was starting to plateau, but you still had big bloggers ironically calling themselves misandrists in bio. I say ironically because unlike an open misogynist, an open misandrist cannot amass vast structural power, they instead will remain on the fringes of society. before they can even be shunned in the mainstream or the elite, they're being shunned by their own peers.

at that time, there was a lot of popular blogs run by (sometimes allegedly) racialized people or "poc-run spaces" like thisisnot[country] and blogs specifically dedicated to pointing out cultural appropriation. i personally contributed to the reclaimthebindi which in retrospect seemed inspired by blackout selfie day (not to be confused with thr subsequent 'blackout' posts associated with BLM - that was later), altho idk to what extent the south asian diasporic community (of which i am a part of) actually paid homage to the black blogger/s responsible for blackout day.

now many of those blogs are defunct or have been scrubbed from level-one searches of tumblr, and their history has not been well documented. it's hard to understand what the climate was unless you were there because not many secondary sources, like the one you're reading right now i suppose, exist. or they weren't well-circulated. this one won't be, i'm turning off reblogs i think.

this is, in my opinion, in contrast to other major trends in internet culture that inform offline social justice movements. that's your gxmxrgxte (so well-ingrained in my memory that it still upsets me enough to censor today), metoo and the annual around ao3's right to host any and all content with very limited few exceptions.

reclaimthebindi is still up, so are a few of the thisisnot blogs, but you can't really tell that they were all interconnected, a part of the same zeitgeist. i have a few theories as to why, and which one you pick depends on how generous you are when imagining the people who ran these blogs. some of them for sure were run by bored college students seeking an outlet. some of them were denied recognition by their offline peers because of racism, so it felt good to find a space where they could actually amass social capital on the basis of the very thing that disadvantaged them in every other space. some were concerned with punitive justice, others with restorative justice. some just posted black and brown bodies so that those images would exist on the internet somewhere. some were run by racefacing white people who also felt like outcasts offline, and saw a quick and easy way to be embraced elsewhere. it's possible that some people did it for a combination of these reasons.

whatever benefits there may have been, it wasn't enough to keep the momentum going. very few put out 'retirement' statements, most just stopped posting and were eventually purged. tbh, i see the draw in airing your grievances all in one place, but it's exhausting, and eventually your supporters grow tired of the negativity, and you grow tired of the negativity too. that's why i think it's usually better to stick to posting and sharing the stuff you love, not the stuff you hate, or at least, find a balance. though their presence is much, much smaller, creator networks for women, lgtbq, and racialized people have sprung up, and so have spaces where people post and repost art that engages with class, race, gender etc.

but it still feels like racialized people have a much quieter voice on tumblr. i have to rely on stumbling upon them naturally, which is next to impossible, especially if you're on tumblr for a small to medium sized fandom, which i think most fandoms are these days. your supermassive fandoms - doctor who, sherlock, kpop, harry potter, the mcu, also no longer dominate the site. i would still say tumblr is the big fandom site, but a lower user count means that the internet's fandom site is smaller than before.

so, less users in general, and any existing minority shrinks. and if we're talking racialized people who are lgtbq, that's an even smaller minority.

this in my opinion has contributed in a major way to the backlash against feminism, the idea that "terfs ruined feminism" with the subtle suggestion that feminism has perhaps failed, or was never really good to begin with, and a laser focus on terfs as the ones responsible as though the mainstream, patriarchal, cis-heteronormative bloc had absolutely nothing to do with it. or the ludicrous idea that terfs are the mainstream, patriarchal cis-heteronormative bloc. two things can be bad, that doesn't mean they're the same thing.

anyway! a big part of the original tumblr feminist movement was not just the "poc run blog" but in the "woc run blog". "poc" was absorbed into BIPOC, and "woc" is a legacy term. your woc were regularly venting about how being a woman of colour means choosing between your race and your gender, putting up with the misogyny of the racialized men in your life who you show up for constantly but who throw you under the bus when the white man asks them how high to jump. now there's white lgbtq bloggers all over the place asking whether you "include black and brown men when you said you say men are trash?" (yes, i absolutely am) and if you ask that question to a room full of white people, they're all going to keep their mouths shut because they don't want to appear racist.

well, white men do not have a monopoly on misogyny. misogyny levied at racialized women by racialized men is a huge intra-community barrier to trying to organize against racism and white supremacy. it is extremely upsetting to see white people suggest that racialized women, lgbtq people and children are not oppressed by the racialized men in their own communities. that we are not survivors of domestic abuse, sexual abuse or that we do not endure oppression under patriarchy in the home, workplace and in society inflicted upon us by our own kin, which compounds upon what we already absorb from white people.

and they can go on doing so on here because many racialized women have shut up and gone away. even running blogs aimed around celebrating themselves has become a service to white consumers that they've done thanklessly for years. just to hear that actually, they have no right to say "men are trash" because what if the brown man that abused them or their mom or their aunties overhears and gets his feelings hurt. didn't we discern the difference between hurt feelings and systemic oppression almost fifteen years ago on tumblr dot com?

like, sure, maybe we should adjust "women only spaces" to be "spaces for women and trans people" but we can do that and not pretend that we have absolutely no idea why women live in fear of men, or that a reasonable amount of fear is completely unwarranted.

man it is one thing to come back here to find all the, admittedly, sometimes kind of annoying sjw blogs around race gone, and another to see a resurgence of popular MRA talking points. but i see how that's happened. racialized women are done talking about this, and who can blame them. white women, and i wish i only meant cis women, get slapped with 'terf' the second they open their mouths, so they are also done talking about this.

if you managed to read all of this please be a little careful when reblogging posts that are critical of feminism. yes, there are a few bad-faith actors within feminism, but feminists in general are a minority group, even if it doesn't feel that way on tumblr. think about it, how long has it been since you saw someone with 'feminist' in bio? is it a good thing to keep facilitating this growing resentment against feminism? has feminism done nothing for us? should we toss it out with the bathwater?

[kmze]

I know exactly which panel you're talking about.Never watched the full video but YouTube algorithm brought one of those Insta-story type videos to my timeline. I think the only way to handle this level of behaviour is by hoping they'd reflect on how they acted while deluding themselves into thinking they were cool and edgy.I think it is fans like these that the writers took a dig at through their writing.In 8×03,When Caroline and Bonnie went wedding dress shopping,Bonnie said "I'm honoured to be your maid of honour and not because my main competition is in a coma till I die" This is them calling out the fandom's belief that Bonnie and Caroline were Elena-substitute or replacements in every step of the way so much so that they actually believed Caroline would make Elena her maid of honour and Bonnie didn't stand a chance.And the same goes for the ~Stefan dated caroline because Nina left~ because Candice was replacing Nina.They refused (& still do) to acknowledge Caroline and Bonnie as individual characters and Candice and Kat as actors who deserved respect.And this sentiment stems from a very mean-mindedness that people are replaceable.And they do so because they think they are demeaning Caroline and Bonnie while they fail to understand that they are objectifying Elena in the process.Everyone is unique in their own way.Each of these women played a different part and they were all equally important in the story.

God algorithms are the bane of my online existence, like I started using Tumblr again because this seems to be the only site I can avoid them and search for what I want. I have seen that small snippet from that panel so many times in Google or Twitter if I search "steroline" but I had to dig for that one of Marguerite doing Liz's letter because that wasn't something to be used as a weapon against a ship. Google is the worst if I search Google the main stuff that comes up is from Reddit which is FLOODED with D*bsley shippers and one of the first things that comes up is "Do people actually like steroline" like eat a dick! This fans just pounce on anything they can use for negativity because they are still crying inside about the endgame, like people use that clip of Candice to say she doesn't like SC and prefers KC as if there's not MULTIPLE gifsets of Candice throughout the years hating that ship. Even Paul calling it forced (which is EVERYWHERE on Twitter and YouTube now) even though there's an interview he did while filming S6 calling it such a slow burn it's almost glacial.

The way the actresses have been treated by fandom for years has always been disgusting, for the most part I think that's why Kat, Candice and Nina avoided cons for so many years and they still don't attend with the frequency of the male actors because. I remember sometimes in S8 there was a video released of Kat calling some storyline garbage and a certain fandom was calling for her to be fired on Twitter with pitchforks and telling her she should be grateful for the job she has and fam THE SHOW WAS OVER! What is she gonna get fired from IT'S OVER! But Paul could drag the show and the writers constantly and it's always seen as funny and "telling it like it is" that's how deep the misogyny goes with this fandom. And I think JP & Co deserve a lot of the blame for that because they perpetuated it especially with her terrible treatment of Bonnie/Kat and the way she continues to cater to ship wars. Watching that panel she did with Carina and Marguerite talking about how much influence social media had on DE and KC being ships is just sad. I don't know if the network really influenced her a lot because they were concerned about ratings, or it was just her in general not being able to mute them but it's just like why are letting online brats influence your story that you created?

I remember when Cami was killed of on TO and then an episode or so later Davina was also killed (and her death was brutal to watch thankfully she came back) an article came out like "why are we killing so many women on TV this week" and yet they still didn't get the wake up call.

[thestobingirlie]

I saw the other anon about steve not understanding social media, and I keep having so many thoughts about this.

In future fics that are set around now, so early-mid 2020's, I hate it when Steve is written as the only one to not understand social media/ technology. He would have about the same level of understanding as the other older teens, with the exception of maybe Jonathan (depending on what he were to do with photography, he might be the type to use social media and the internet to promote his work, and could have been doing so for a while.) But the rest of the older teens? They'd be on about the same level as anyone else that was born in the mid-late 60s, putting them in their mid 50s now. They'd be able to work their way around the basics of the internet, and would be able to navigate like facebook, but they wouldn't care to keep up with the changes in what social media is popular and all the trends. (I am 100% basing this off how my dad navigates the internet/social media because he is in the same age range as the older teens).

Hell, even the younger teens probably wouldn't be massive into social media. Born early 70's, now just into their 50's. Again, not the age range that are all over the new, cool social media. Dustin would be the one with best understanding of it, because he is the one of the main characters that is shown to be most into tech stuff (also, Suzie would be even better, because she's a hacker in the 80s.)

The ones that would be the best on social media stuff would be Erica and Holly, just based off the fact that they're the youngest. They would have both been in their 20s when Myspace and Facebook launched, the prime age for them getting into it.

But I think it comes with 2 things that cause it.

The first, it's just people not understanding that social media isn't exactly new. The websites that formed the basis of internet social networking launched close to 30 years ago. And the start of social media as we know it launched 20 years ago (myspace in 03, facebook in 04).

The second, and the main, reason I think they have Steve being so much worse at social media/ technology than the others is to further promote the 'Steve is dumb' thing. That he doesn't understand it because everyone else is just so much smarter than he is. (I hate hate hate the steve is dumb idea and it just needs to die)

there’s this tiktoker who just takes photos on old cameras, and i could see jonathan doing that, if he isn’t as introverted in his old age.

i could also see the argument for nancy being a little more technologically advanced, because of her reporting. however, i think by her fifties she’s already retreated from society and lives in a bunker and breaks into government facilities to steal confidential files. very murray, hermit crab-esque. so, she doesn’t really post on social media lmao

anyway! yeah, i think they’d be able to work phones, to like, an old person degree, but also i don’t really think they’d have much social media. like. i think most of the kids and teens know what social media is, and probably have old accounts that they never use. but i don’t think they’d be good online.

erica would be incredible on social media. the only character that consistently uses it. she’s mean to people on twitter, she makes tiktok’s. she’s a politician or something, but she refuses to be seen as behind on the times so she makes younger people teach her how to use them.

yeah, i think a lot of people just don’t know much about how social media grew, when it was made etc. but i do agree that i think a lot of steve being considered far behind all the others is the idiot joke. it’s just really weird when everyone else is incredible and totally of the times, but steve can’t even make phone calls.

[mayspicer]

I'm bitter and sad and salty about my art and social media capabilities. Depressed vague posting ahead.

First, I don't really mean anyone I know better than a recurring name on the internet or something. I'm vagueposting about the general public and I really appreciate the engagement I do get. I also understand that random spam and sketches are not really reblog worthy, I wouldn't reblog most doodles either.

Anyway, nothing better than having over 330 followers on my art blog, posting stuff that I'm proud of/excited about and getting the same amount of notes that random sketches get (less than 10 and that includes multiple self reblogs). Super nice posting on art servers and getting like 3 reactions while all art before and after my post (and similar in skill level) gets numerous reacts. Super great when artists vocal about the importance of reblogging leave a like if I'm lucky.

I love all of this, especially in times like these, where I'm without a job for a year now, applying for art and animation positions and getting rejected over and over again. Despite working in animation before, just for some shitty games. It's great hearing my whole life that I should pursue art because I'm soooo talented. Fucking sure, I actually believed that for a moment. That I could have a career in art because I'm pretty good at it. Apparently I'm delusional and wasted everything.

I create mostly for myself, my enjoyment, my characters. But I need people to see what I do, to say SOMETHING. I'm desperately grasping any straws I get. I spam our pathfinder discord because I can't live without showing people what I make. But showing to the void isn't enough. A heart emoji under a post means only that they like that their friend is drawing (especially something that they take part in. I would be happy if I saw a stickman drawing of anyone's character from our games). But when it comes to offering any help which would require actually vouching for my skill, there is noone. When I put hours, days into art, featuring even someone's characters, I have to ask for opinion to hear ANYTHING.

I hate that networking means everything and nothing I can do, none of my skills matter when it comes to getting a job, when it comes to stupid numbers on my posts. I barely can keep up with my closest people, and even these I regularly lose because of stunted social battery. Art contests during my animation studies were actually popularity contests. Life is a popularity contest and none of the other qualities mean anything if you don't know how to be social because you are neurologically different. I grew up believing that what I do matters, who I am matters. That being myself and doing what I love can speak for me. Turns out I'm just alone.

I don't know what's wrong with me. My art made in middle school was insanely more popular. My early art that I posted on Tumblr did better. My friends are saying the nicest things about memes I redraw in 2 minutes.

Am I actually stupid trying that hard to get a job in my fields? I don't know how to do anything else... I'll be 30 years old in October. I know people (close-ish, we regularly talk) who are my age or younger who are heads of like character design departments. Of course I tried asking them for any help. After getting a reply of "you just have to do it, I learned everything myself and my friend hired me, just do it lol" I got kinda discouraged and feel like trash for bothering people for anything. The only artistic artistic person I know personally right now is much below my level (don't wanna sound judgy and like I'm who knows how skilled), repeatedly asks me for help with animation and art and portfolio assembly and I help and I see how their stuff looks. But all that matters is their ability to sell themselves, an image of themselves. They called themselves an animator when they were unable to animate a simple walk cycle properly. And it worked. They just talked themselves into getting hired as a... 3D generalist? And now they are the main character artist/designer and animator in that studio. And I asked them for help. Got a dismissive non-answer.

I don't know what to do anymore, but clearly I'm not fit to live in the world that works like this.

[seeminglyseph]

I’m like. Absolutely terrible at dealing with PMS, but, there’s something about getting used to knowing that, which is making it a little easier because now I’m like. “Okay, I’m starting to track the weeks now, and with my Fitbit that’s a little easier, and I can plan in advance for the mood shifts and the abrupt changes in my inflammation levels”

Though I admit I still forget how much it’s gonna affect me until it starts happening and I’m like “what the fuck is this shit why do i abruptly hurt more than i did a week ago? Also emotionally i want to die and my brain is not working properly at all” which i mean.

All of those things suck, so I think part of it is that thing where your brain forgets how bad pain is? Also since my memory and cognitive functioning just fucking nosedives every time I probably just like. Fully forget what it’s like. Because my brain is just lagging like I ran out of processing power and it’s a disaster.

But also I hated being on BC for menstrual control, and there are multiple sources that tie it with aggravating IIH, or triggering it. And so I don’t know, I don’t think I want to go back on BC. Though if I want to start having an active sex life I should definitely start looking into it, but also also I’m probably old enough and disabled enough I could get someone to tie my tubes without much fuss. I mean given that Canada is unacceptably cool with sterilization in too many situations I could probably just be like “I am not interested in passing my genetics down to another generation” and not have any doctors fight me since I’m already old enough that doctors would start having concerns. Yeah my mom had her kids at about this age but her illnesses were car related. Most of the autoimmune stuff showed up in my generation or my dad’s side of the family, or I didn’t hear about it because we moved to a different province and therefore I have like none of the family history that everyone else does.

I should maybe try and restart my Facebook since that’s where the family does social media but also that website is hell. I feel like I should try to do more social media in other places for like. Idk. Networking and communication and socialization, but also I feel like I hate that? And I don’t know the norms of those platforms at all and I’m starting way behind everyone else and it sucks. I don’t mind Reddit for the most part, though I’m not really active on it, but it has some communities that I like. But places where I’m expected to be myself is like. Hell. I like some degree of like… separation from my family and social expectations and stuff like. Probably no one here is gonna judge whether I’m presenting an acceptable enough representation of myself to the outside world of who I am.

Like this isn’t the version of me that feels like has to be business casual and not scare the normies? Idk exactly how to explain it without sounding fake but like there’s an acceptable amount of mentally ill or disabled or whatever for certain people and that’s for things that have my real name on it. And then there’s places where I can be seph who has problems with hygiene and ADHD and ASD and cPTSD and probably BPD or bipolar 2 or something and Agoraphobia and I haven’t been able to function in like 2+ years because of so many Symptoms of all the Things and it just makes people uncomfortable to have to deal with the reality of how much that affects a person and how that’s not easy to deal with or whatever. Or like the fact that people with all this shit take work and time and effort and whatnot, and are sometimes disagreeable and emotional and messy. And I don’t want to deal with people lashing out with anger because they want to be a good person, but they don’t have any patience to deal with like… the reality of caring for someone who isn’t a really convenient cute image of a damaged person they’d imagined. Like I empathize, because it is hard, but also like. I’ve dealt with it too much, too many times already and I’m kinda over it. So I dunno I’m figuring it out.

[sparksflamesembersashes]

Another thing about the Caryl situ.... What if, in fact, Melissa just got fed up with Caryl? What if Carol Peletier is Melissa McBride's "Misery"? Maybe the character she'd created had become the only thing she was judged by, and she just got tired of it. Not to mention, Melissa seems like a kind hearted and gentle soul IRL, and all the abuse, vitriol, and anger on the Twitter hellscape and elsewhere may have taken a psychological toll on her. Maybe the viciousness (mostly from antis, but not all) had been ripping her up inside for years and she just wanted to walk away from it. Maybe to her, Caryl is the monster they created and she just wanted it dead. You can't blame her. It's no wonder she all but left the social media platform years ago. She obviously hasn't cared to engage with fans on that level for a long time, and having read some of the hateful things people say to or about her or her character, I get it. She's only human, after all. And people get SO emotional about their ships! The pressure must have been insurmountable at times. Maybe she had to walk just to preserve her own sanity. We don't know, and we'll probably never know, because Melissa's personal life and her personal decisions are none of our business, and she is an intensely private person. Can you imagine how she feels if, in fact, this was entirely HER decision and HER choice, and we're all making it sound like she got screwed over by the network and her co-star? How absolutely mortifying would that be? I'm just saying what if... I am inclined to think she got shoved aside, but we just don't know. And if we're wrong, we're not helping her in rising up and protesting the cancellation of the spin-off... we're just prolonging her agony. No one wants to let people down, and the pain and sorrow from the fandom could be crushing her.

As for Norman, yes, he is an entitled male celebrity and he's had that status for a long time. But listen, the guy is engaged, he has a toddler with his fiancee (who is also a hot property in her own right), and who among us wouldn't throw almost everything else to the four winds to spend more time with the people we love and cherish the most? One thing the COVID pandemic has left in its aftermath is a new appreciation for the stuff that's most important in the world. Norman had mentioned in an interview that he'd been working almost constantly for 10 years, and when everybody went into lockdown, I think he discovered the meaning of true family time. Not to mention the risk of death can lead you to re-evaluate your life in general. So if he jettisoned everything to spend more time with Diane and his daughter, I can be pissed at him for doing it, but I can't really judge him over it. I don't have that kind of love in my life, but I imagine if I did, I'd do just about anything to hold onto it as long as possible. Are we really gonna gut the man over choosing his real life family over a fictitious one? I want to (you have no idea), but I won't. Because I get it.

So I'm just sad and grieving, and at first I wanted to protest and deny this new reality, and now I'm just accepting it. Because we will never know why it happened and maybe we shouldn't. And we don't truly know if anyone was cheated out of anything (except us Caryl shippers, of course). At the end of the day, Melissa and Norman are individual human beings with their own lives, and expecting them to bend to the will of a segment of their fans (no matter how large) to compromise their own life goals (and maybe their mental health) in order to maintain fictional characters we've invested way too much of our own time in is, IMO, unrealistic, and more than a little selfish. Maybe that's not the reality, but maybe it is. You know the saying, truth is stranger than fiction. We don't know all the truths here, only bits and pieces that we'll still speculate on for months to come.

I am a Caryl shipper. God help me. And if you accuse me of not shipping Carol, or not stanning Melissa, I will fight your ass to my last breath. But enough is enough. The shit I've seen on Twitter gets worse every day, and people behave so badly when they can hide behind a pseudonym on social media. There's no way to know if I'm hurting or helping by participating. Absent further factual enlightenment, I'm taking the path of least resistance and having a seat on the sidelines. The truth always eventually comes out, but I'm not going to feed any more fires until I know what the truth actually is. And that could take a while... if it happens at all.

I have given so much of my heart and my love to Caryl, and it's been more beautiful and rewarding at times than I could have imagined, but now I'm going to focus that love and my heart on real people, in the real world. Maybe that's exactly what Melissa and Norman have chosen to do. We just don't know. Caryl on, but keep it in perspective. Life is shorter than you think. Make it count.

[thephantomcasebook]

Why is that you’re convinced Spotchnik was fired? I’m not saying the evidence isn’t there but it seems debatable or at the very least inconclusive…I’ve read several different accounts with varying levels of evidence/validity and I don’t know what to think (outside of it seems impossible to know for sure-sure).

And would WB really cancel HotD so rapidly over a single fuckup when by viewership standards it has drawn massive numbers, especially when comparing to other shows on the network….? (The numbers are there and by all accounts the majority of response has been positive.) I guess I’m wondering what kinda fuckup you’re referring to that would warrant cancellation.

Your takes are interesting and certainly hold merit, I guess it just throws me that you speak with such 100% conviction and assurance that you are correct when much of this is impossible to know with certainty outside of knowledgeable speculation. Although- genuine question- were you on set and this is all secret insider information?

I fully admit to having must less knowledge in many of the subjects you espouse on when it comes to your HotD statements. And I certainly mean no disrespect. I guess I just have some confusion as to some of your meaning in the posts as well as objective fact statements vs subjective opinion statements (as in which are which).

I certainly look forward to reading more of your page, especially as you are very convincing in your thoroughness and I enjoy your posts. ❤️

Well, to be honest with you @castellomargot ...

How exactly would want me to speak?

As you say, my takes have merit, I've got my ear to the ground, and I've picked up stuff from studious observation after thirteen years of fandom. It is what I believe is true, it seems the truth.

"You have always told me it was Ernest. I have introduced you to every one as Ernest. You answer to the name of Ernest. You look as if your name was Ernest. You are the most earnest-looking person I ever saw in my life. It is perfectly absurd your saying that your name isn’t Ernest!"

I'm open to being wrong and assume I am wrong all the time. But why not speak with back straight and chest out till it is proven that I am?

No offense, but I don't understand your issue with my tact other than you find it boisterous or it illicit's a defensive reaction - which you wouldn't be the first. But I'm not gonna change who I am or why I say the things I do. I'm confident in my opinions and what the truth is. And when I'm proven wrong beyond a reasonable doubt than I'll concede.

As for Spotchnik, it's because it was reported by every insider that he was fired. He feuded with Martin over Daeron. He was an arrogant asshole and has been an arrogant asshole since he started working on Game of Thrones. He hates the fans. His political bullshit nearly torpedoed the show, especially late in the game when he pushed that "Alicent is a woman for Trump" bullshit that left Cooke twisting in the wind and was extremely unfair to her - and that's speaking as a Trump Supporter.

The dude is a prick, and has always been a prick, and so when insiders said that he fucked with the wrong people at Discovery Plus AND he was telling GRRM to go fuck himself?

Fuck Yeah, he got fired.

I think you underestimate how bad Game of Thrones Season 8 was. It is still considered the WORST Television Disaster in the history of the medium. No one has forgotten how bad that was. It is hanging over HOTD like the Sword of Damocles. People are cautiously giving it the benefit of the doubt. But the moment they fuck up people are gonna abandon it in droves.

What could they possibly do to get cancelled?

The question is what can't they do to get cancelled.

The ending of Episode 9 with Rhaenys murdering hundreds of people for "Girl Power" is exactly the kind of Season 8 shit that turned people against the franchise from the beginning. And a ton of people have come against it and hate it. Have Olivia Cooke and Emma D'arcy go around spouting anti-men shit on the red carpet and in interviews and see how much a fickle viewing audience is gonna stick around.

People don't like or respond well to that smug London bullshit that Olivia Cooke and Emma D'arcy can't seem to keep out of interviews - nor the clear apathy and disdain that D'arcy shows toward the fanbase. Look, no offense, but Twitter and - certainly - Tumblr are not a majority opinion. It is unfair what Spotchnik did to Cooke with that "Women for Trump" thing, but people came down hard on her, because, she didn't do herself any favors with her interviews before hand with all that London luxury politics nonsense.

Look, this sounds harsh, but I'm not coming down on you.

There are way too many people in the fandom that are in a social bubble, who get caught up in the mires of fandom and stan culture that don't realize that there is a world beyond it - a very real world. And yeah, we're fans of this shit and we ship things like Alicole and Helaemond hard. But out there, people are normies, and they watch this shit on the casual. And they're far less forgiving than we are.

I'm not sure what you're measure is from "What I've seen" but I talk to normal people not insulated in fandom and they're not fully on board with HOTD and they don't find Cooke and D'arcy cute. If you leave the fandom or Tumblr and Twitter you find a lot of people don't like them or what they have to say. And no one has forgotten Season 8.

Normal, everyday, people are the lifeblood of this show and it's continued success. They're people that don't live in London or hang out with a bunch of miserable artistic assholes who drink too much and think that if they say they're socialist or Non-Binary it makes them edgy and compassionate.

That is exactly the kind of culture that gets your show cancelled - ask Disney.

[be11atrixthestrange]

According To The Stars

Be11a writes Jily Fluff! Read here or on AO3

*******

According To The Stars

While working on Divination homework, James learns something new about Lily. Good thing Divination is a load of rubbish... or is it?

*******

James wasn't sure if he believed in Divination, or if it was just a load of rubbish. Honestly, one of the only reasons he was still taking the subject was the company — it was on Lily Evans' sixth-year timetable, and therefore his.

His friends had dropped the subject, and they made sure to take the mickey out of him when he signed back up.

"Divination, really James?"

"Why take that when you could have a free period?"

"Is it the subject matter that fascinates you, or is it a certain redhead?"

The questions were rhetorical, and his friends knew that. They were perfectly aware of James' motivation for sticking around in Divination, and they knew that he preferred they weren't there. Not many students continued beyond their O.W.L. year in the subject, and James was happy that Lily was the only other student he knew well. He could assure they would always be partnered up for projects, and he didn't have to worry about anyone swooping in and stealing her attention from him. Not Remus, Sirius, Peter, or worst of all, Snivellus.

James was procrastinating on his Divination essay in the Gryffindor common room when Lily approached him.

"Have you started?" she asked.

"Not yet, I was waiting for you. I was hoping you could help."

"You're smart, you'll figure it out," she said as she took a seat at the table beside him. "It's just a birth chart, anyway."

Just a birth chart. The problem wasn't that James thought birth charts were difficult to understand; it was that he hated the idea of them. The fact that the date, location, and time of his birth supposedly determined his fate really bothered him.

Earlier in class, they had mapped out their star signs, and their homework was to analyze them. He had been feeling a pit of dread all day, simply because he'd have to dive into all of the details of his future. He truly didn't want to know what the stars had to say about his life. In James' opinion, there was no point in knowing how or when he might die, who his future wife would be, how many kids he would have, or what he would do for an occupation. It sucked all of the excitement right out of life and stripped him of his autonomy. He wanted to believe that his choices mattered.

He knew he should take it all with a grain of salt because humans could never fully understand the truth of the stars. Predictions were wrong all the time, and there were always going to be flaws in human methods of telling the future.

But the mere idea that James' future was set in stone made him deeply uncomfortable. Like his friends, he could simply choose not to believe in any of it, but the problem was that he sort of did.

He looked over to see that Lily had already started her essay and was scribbling furiously on her parchment. Reluctantly, he turned back to his own star chart and began writing too.

My name is James Potter, and I was born at 5:45 pm on Sunday, March 27th, 1960, in London, England.

This makes my Sun Sign Aries, my Moon Sign Aries, and my Ascendant Libra.

Sun Sign: Aries

The sun determines our ego, identity, and 'role' in life. It's the core of who we are. On my birthdate — Sunday, March 27th, 1960 — my Sun was in Aries.

I am fundamentally assertive, persistent, and courageous. Naturally competitive and fiercely independent, I push things forward with energy and enthusiasm. I am determined, and I persevere through anything.

James thought back to his time on the Quidditch Pitch, where he would do anything for a victory. He was a risk-taker with a deep desire to win, and that had landed him in the Hospital Wing more times than he'd care to admit. He was definitely independent — although he played Chaser on the Gryffindor team, he much preferred the solitary aspect of Seeker; when playing Chaser, his fellow teammates often badgered him for being a "Quaffle-Hog".

I need to learn to understand other people as complex wholes.

The analysis felt spot-on for James. People were like puzzles, and he enjoyed figuring them out. All-day, James had been riddled with curiosity about Lily's birth chart. He was planning to ask her about it tonight and was excited to get to know her on a deeper level.

I feel the need to distinguish myself from others.

James felt exposed by that one. He was a prankster; he enjoyed his popularity, and he often engaged in what others — mainly professors — would call "attention-seeking behavior." Touche, birth chart, he thought, as he carried on writing.

Moon Sign: Aries

The moon rules our emotions, moods, and feelings, reflecting our personalities when we're alone and comfortable. On my birthdate — Sunday, March 27th, 1960 — my Moon was in Aries.

My emotional self is independent, energetic, and enthusiastic. I have a tendency to feel inadequate and overcompensate just because failure is a possibility.

That one hurt a bit. James immediately felt defensive as he wrote it, but deep down, he knew it was true. As the only son of a well-known and successful family, failure was not an option. He was no stranger to pressure, and sometimes he overcompensated. He was a smart kid, but he often relied on his charm to build connections and network. He knew his smooth-talking could drive some people — mostly Lily — insane, but it was nothing more than a defense mechanism because he truly was terrified of failure.

I find security and safety through close relationships and long-term partnerships.

James held his friends close, and had no idea what he would do without them. He believed they would all be there for him for the rest of his life, and he couldn't entertain the idea that they might not. He would risk his life to protect his friends, and they'd do the same for him. According to his analysis, whether or not his overwhelming trust in others was a strength or a weakness was open to interpretation, and James chose to see it as a good thing. What was the point of life without friends, anyway? He smiled warmly at the thought and continued.

Ascendant: Libra

Our Ascendant is the "mask" we present to people. It can be seen in our personal style and our first impressions. Some say its relevance fades as we age. Our Ascendant is determined by our time of birth — I was born at 5:45 pm, meaning my Ascendant is Libra.

I come across as compromising, courteous, and impartial, though sometimes passive-aggressive.

For most people, he was a compromising and courteous individual, at least for people he liked. Unfortunately, passive-aggressive was a no-brainer as well. Some folks — particularly Snivellus — might say he was a bully. In detention, he'd received lectures about how pranking and cursing others was not the proper way to alleviate interpersonal issues. McGonagall never hesitated to tell him that a calm and rational discussion would be much more effective than a Levicorpus Charm. Admittedly, his methods could be considered passive-aggressive.

I am inclined towards balance.

James was a well-rounded fellow, that was for sure. He was an academic, an athlete, and he maintained a social life quite effortlessly. Balance truly was important to him. There was just one part missing from his ideal balance — a relationship. More specifically, a relationship with Lily.

In fact, that missing piece was one of the first things he looked for when he began his birth chart analysis. On a separate piece of parchment, he had scribbled down a few signs — Aquarius, Sagittarius, Leo, and Gemini. According to the stars, his ideal life partner's Sun, Moon, and Ascendant signs should fall into these categories. Part of him didn't want to know what Lily's chart said, and the rest of him needed to. It could all be rubbish, but maybe it wasn't.

"What are your signs, Lily?"

"Why do you want to know?" she asked.

"Research," he said.

"You want to know my fate?"

"You could say that," he responded. It was partially true — he wanted to know what the stars said about her life, but specifically her compatibility with him.

Lily sighed. "My Sun Sign is Aquarius."

James' stomach fluttered with excitement. Aquarius was one of his most compatible signs, so that was a good start. "And your Moon Sign?"

"Pisces."

He tried not to let the disappointment show on his face. Nowhere on his chart did it say he should look for someone with a Pisces Moon Sign. "What about your Ascendant?"

James froze in anticipation, hoping for Lily to say one of the four options. Two of three compatible signs would make them a decent match.

"Virgo."

His stomach sank. One out of three matching signs wasn't ideal. Sure, it could work, but it meant that Lily wouldn't be his perfect partner. If he were to believe the stars, there was someone else out there that was better suited to him, and he wasn't sure if he wanted that to be true.

"Are you okay?" asked Lily.

James tried his best to smile and mask his fallen expression. He was okay; he just really wished Lily's astrological signs were fully compatible with his, but he didn't feel like he could tell her that. At least not straight-up.

"Do you believe in all of this?" he asked instead.

"Divination?"

"Yeah, but more specifically, this birth chart stuff. Do you believe that this should determine your future? Your personality, your jobs, and who you should be with?"

"Who I should be with?" she asked, her eyes moving to his parchment. She was squinting, and James wondered if she was trying to read his chart. "What are your signs?"

He hesitated before answering. What if she really did believe in all of it, and learning how lukewarm their compatibility was just turned her away? He knew he couldn't get away without telling her, so he took a deep breath and responded. "Aries, Aries, Libra."

Lily didn't say anything at first, and the pit grew in James' stomach the longer she was quiet.

"Lily?" he asked after she'd been silent for a few seconds too long for comfort. "What do you believe?"

"Honestly?" she said. "I believe it's a load of rubbish. At least I hope it is. What about you?"

He felt a wave of relief at her words. "Good. I think it's rubbish too, and I hope we're right."

She smiled at him, and he grinned back, the heat rising to his cheeks. They turned to their essays and began writing again. There was a little bounce in their quills, a mark of the excitement between two teenagers who just — sort of — admitted something big.

James felt better knowing that whatever his birth chart said about his future, his choices did matter. Sure, the stars might have a plan for him, but if they didn't involve the cute Aquarius beside him, he'd happily choose not to believe any of it.

[docholligay]

Please rant/rave (well, we already know which one it will be here) about Harry Potter!

GEE I HOPE THIS WAS WORTH WAITING FOR

OH MY GOD. The level of hatred I have for Harry Fucking Goddamn Potter, the culture around Harry Fucking Potter, extending its poisonous tentacles even to the concept of young adult fiction, fantasy, and the United Kingdom as a country and people. 

When you being on this, you may think, “Oh, Doc will explain that Harry Potter sucks because JKR hates trans women” and I will say, oh no, dear reader, that is a fantastic reason to hate the author, and I really suggest we all continue to hate her, and perhaps not purchase the QUEEN’S TONNES of officially licensed merchandise and movies and theme parks that give her stupid little fucking hands all that cash, but no, that is not why I hate the work. There are a number of great works done by terrible people, and the further out the lens of history gets the truer this is. 

I hate Harry Potter because it fucking sucks, and mentally stifled an entire fucking generation. 

“Well, Doc, Harry Potter was really there for me when--” Oh my god I could not fucking care LESS about your personal emotion connection to “orphan wizard boy turns out to be a rich aristocrat yet somehow less woke than Cinderella though” I have personally emotional connections to hot fucking garbage pails of media properties, and if someone came barreling through talking about the myriad ways in which they were horrible, I would be like, “Oh, you aren’t fucking wrong, pal” 

Harry Potter gained wild ass popularity in part due to its magnificent sorting system of Smart, Brave, Evil, and Other, because there’s nothing liberals like more than being able to put everyone’s personality into an easily labeled box, which is why astrology is so popular, or for the intellectuals, Myers-Briggs, which is just as fake but with the veneer of science. This allowed people to give into the tribalism they so desperately liked to pretend they did not possess, and also allow them to write thinkpieces about “The misunderstood Hufflepuff” or “Slytherins aren’t all bad!” or really anything that allows them to write a very real piece about their very imagined oppression for being a part of a totally fake house in a children’s book. Excellent use of your sociology degree, Kai, I thought the addition of phrases like, ‘Content of socialization” and “axes of oppression” really spoke to the struggles you face when wearing a green and silver scarf. 

The other reason it became popular is that it’s essentially wallpaper paste formed into characters. I have read all of the books, and I could not tell you even remotely what Harry’s defining personality traits are other than “protagonist”. In American, at least, a large part of it was the fascination with all things British, with the idea of boarding school and prefects and uniforms that aren’t inexplicably chinos and polo shirts for nine year olds. It allowed children to project onto something so bland that it could be anything. And for children, THAT’S FINE. There is a great deal of bland media made for children, but what I’m speaking to is the fandom, which is largely well over the age of 18. 

Because if we look at the books, are they...actually good? Was it good, or did I experience it as a child? I mean, honestly, on a literary level, are they, or was it just like we all watched Friends, we did it because everyone else was doing it, because I have a distinct memory of a series that involves such greats as “magical geegaws with poorly defined rules that are quickly forgotten despite being able to solve later problems quickly” or “Everyone loves Harry or is a bad guy, or secretly loved Harry all along” 

Oh, speaking of, man, if this was an actual well-written book, wouldn’t it have been wild to have Snape’s whole thing be to teach us that sometimes people do good things for the wrong reasons? Instead of naming your fucking child after the guy who ‘protected you’ because he still wanted to bone your mom? “After all this time” “Always.” 

While all this could have been explained, we have Quidditch added into the mix instead because 20 pages of the goddamn Puppy Bowl is exactly what I was looking for while I was waiting for JK to move the goddamn ball on literally any of these actual magical concepts. 

Harry Potter is a fucking trust fund baby, star quarterback, who grows up to be a cop and marries his high school sweetheart. (Speaking of, why were we shocked that JKR turned out to be a piece of shit when this was and always has been the conclusion of Harry Potter? Why are liberals so fucking into this series that upholds structures like it ain’t no one’s business? It’s a series that opines that those beneath us “Muggles” should be kept in the dark from us) Literally, he finds out he is a wizard and has a dragon-guarded fucking VAULT OF CASH. At 11. It’s such a series for little tyrants, you are special from birth and need do nothing to prove it, here is a letter certifying as such. Oh, not only are you rich and the greatest seeker and have excellent quips, but also your parents were not only rebels, but the best of rebels, and so deeply involved that your parents were killed by the big bad personally, again, because you are so special. His mother’s love literally saves his ass over and over again, because he was SO SPECIAL. He fought Voldemort FROM THE BEGINNING, and WON.  It’s literally the most privilege baby fantasy in the world. 

“But Doooooooooooc, it’s for chiiiiiiiiiiiiiiildren” 

A) Yeah, and you’re 32, you’re making my fucking point about Harry Potter setting an entire generation up for intellectual failure to launch. 

B) Okay, and? I can think of a bunch of kids’ books off the top of my head that in no way require specialness to be given by birth so as to roll out the red carpet for master protagonist. The Hunger Games. Watership Down. A Series of Unfortunate Events. The Chronicles of FUCKING NARNIA, about which I have only a small handful of particularly kind things to say. I’ve never read Percy Jackson, but it’s my understanding that despite his being a literal demigod, the attitudes of the supporting cast are allowed to fall between the extremes of “Appreciates Percy” and “naughty or will learn” Harry does nothing to improve himself even after knowing that he is HUNTED BY THE BIG BAD! “I won’t do this because I don’t like Snape”. So There” which, again, if this series were written with the slightest bit of care or know-how, could be a humbling fucking plot point! BUT NO THAT WOULD BE NAUGHTY. 

But the real reason I hate Harry Potter so much has everything to do with the fandom surrounding it, and how it intellectually stunted a generation of adults. The promise of Harry Potter was that it was supposed to make a new generation of readers, and so the popularity of them was pushed, and so there was discussion of teaching them in schools, but I tell you fucking what, I know a whole lot more folks who grew up reading Harry Potter that never advanced beyond reading YA, or even just rereading the entire series every year and that’s pretty much them done and dusted. 

In the attempt to recapture whatever it was about Harry Potter that attracted children (A lot of it was your peers doing it. I read them all as they came out, and it was literally the equivalent of watching the game so you could talk at the water cooler. That was never going to be recaptured) people, who by this time were likely in their teens, kept getting recommended stuff at the same and same level. No one ever felt pushed to read things that are challenging, to read things that have some of the concepts or themes of Harry Potter but maybe complicate. I know FAR more adults who read adult books that aren’t into Harry Potter, even if they were as children, than the reverse. 

But Doc, why is reading only books meant for 14 year olds a problem??? I mean I suppose I can’t convince you that comfort is not the job of literature or of life, it is the job of an easy chair, because Americans especially are decadent as fuck about being comfy cozy all the time and if anything causes them distress or pain it should be immediately avoided. But Maybe I can convince you that you’re fucking up these books for actual ass children who deserve to have their own writing section without adults bringing their fucking asses into it. They deserve their own spaces. There’s a number of YA editors who have talked about the difficult space YA now occupies because since Potter’s blowup, it’s no longer a niche category, but basically “adult easy reads” and so they have been buying books that are more about the tastes of adult buyers than of literal 14 year olds. 

Is that not...sad? To anyone else? Honestly, and this is not part of the essay because it’s a broader reaching problem, but CHILDREN’S MEDIA IS NOT FOR US. CHILDREN’S MEDIA IS NOT FOR US. CHILDREN’S MEDIA IS FOR FUCKING CHILDREN. The fucking 40-23 set really needs to get their shit together and grow up a little bit and engage in some fucking adult media, and maybe, if we support what we’re actually looking for FOR ADULTS, it will come to us. No one is saying you can’t read Harry Potter or watch some Cartoon Network show, but like, search your heart and come the fuck on. Engage in something more complex. If not for yourselves, for the kids getting shoved into simplified adult stories. It should not be about us. 

ANYWAY, my larger point is that it was Harry Potter, a badly written series about a magical boy who was chosen and magic and also rich and also a favorite of the headmaster and also more clever than most adults and also spoke the same magical snake language as the big bad and was also star quarterback, but at least there was a system in which you could buy a scarf in block colors and feel like you belonged to a team. 

(But not a sports team! lol handegg! I’m cool I don’t get into sports! Except Quidditch.) 

[supercharmed-forever-mine]

Today I will be addressing SuperCorp and some of the issues that have been floating around about fandom. And I will be saying some stuff that both is for it and could be used against it even though I am ultimately a super big supercorp fan. Like it says in the tags you're free to express your opinion but they will not be changing mine but I am always open-minded to opinions that can actually be explained and eloquently expressed (receipt's needed) and aren't just basic. Also just so what is noted I have been a part of this fandom since the first episode I have literally shipped Kara with everyone from Lucy to Cat even James.But Lena has just stuck out the most for me but I'm Equal opportunity.

Number #1, Lena's character in no way shape or form has ever been xenophobic she has never once shown any hate towards aliens her problem with Kara in season 5 Wasn't because she was an alien it was because she was a "Super" like Kara could have been a flying purple fucking octopus from the planet of shzjxfdf and Lena wouldn't have gave two fucks but no she was a "Super"but let's dig deeper on that point if we really look at why she was mad it wasn't even the whole alien aspect it was because she wasn't told and no I don't think she's entitled to it but I do think it played into the fact of a trust issue she has with the fact that people would think she would be just like Lex if she had been told Sooner. Which is disproved in 5x13 (also personal note: I also think she wouldn't have reacted half as bad if Kara had just told her that night at game night or the next day when she wanted to probably still would have been pissed but not to the same extent). But okay with that being said I do disagree with the kryptonite entrapment torture scene and basically half the s*** she did in season 5 it was shown that she truly can tap into her Luthor side and be dark when wanted but fortunately she does always return to the light and in all fairness it has been shown several times that Kara has a dark side of her own that could rival the luthors.

Number #2, I do disagree with the abuse of actresses and actors just because of a ship and or character they play don't blame them it's just a job they have I think Melissa and Katie do a beautiful job of bringing Kara and Lena's characters to life couldn't imagine anybody else playing them.

Number #3, I also will say about the reason bombarding of comments on Nicole's social media at least I saw the video via tiktok in that video was fucking hilarious I love Nia, Dreamer,and Nicole in general she's funny and beautiful and is an advocate for everything good in life and well it is normal to even ask other actors if they have the scoop on anything it does not mean we need to be bombarding them in videos on something relating to their character or their love of something a simple comment or so maybe but what I saw NO.

Number #4, The William of it all well I think though his character seems like a nice gentleman he also seems to be bland as hell also I did not know he was a POC to be honest I thought he was a tan white man and we'll be doing further research on people in the future as I can learn from my ignorance also but unrelated I did not know that the woman who played Maggie was apparently just a tan white woman I thought she was of some sort of Hispanic descent but apparently not according to various things I've read on here tonight... But anyways back to William I feel like a lot of people might have perceived him as a white man therefore that might play into the whole scenario of people hate that they just want two white woman together when it proves if she was a man they wouldn't give two f**** about it whether that's true or not I don't know but mine two cents.

Number #5, I will never bash someone for being for or against a certain ship and or character and well I am allowed to certainly disagree with their opinion all opinions are valid because we all see the world a different way some see it bright and shiny and others like I'll admit myself see it through the glasses of trauma. And I think that's why we all have the opinions we do most of the time when you like a shipper character it's because you relate to them somehow even if it's the most minor thing to someone else it might be huge for you. You never know what the person on the other side of the screen is going through in those characters or ship or fanfiction might have literally saved their lives.

Sidenote: Like okay personal story I was been both mentally and sexually abused as a child so I relate to both Kara and Lena respective childhood trauma so that draws me to them. And I kind of see them both as the opposite attract trope (two side of the same coin) because well we never fully get over trauma Kara had a great support system with the Danvers whereas Lena didn't get that with the luthors I mean sure she had Lex at first but even that was only to a certain extent because of his psychopathy that was starting to manifest he couldn't perceive human emotions the same as Lena who in my opinion is just a big mushy nerd who can be a badass when needed as evident by the season 6 episodes after she's quit L-Corp she's constantly trying to help out inventing new stuff and she's wondering how Nia's suit works and it just shows that she just has a curious mind and also she looks happier even with the guilt she feels over Kara's phantom zone incident when Nia called her a part of the family that smile could lit up a city all she's ever wanted is to belong and I can relate to that therefore to her.

Number #6, I feel like this should have been addressed in earlier number but as far as sexuality goes I would want to believe Kara is pansexual because of everything I've ever read and saw I don't believe she perceived sexuality like humans do because of her Kryptonian upbringing for the first good chunk of the life. Like even though she says she's not gay in the first episode, A. It was the first episode so they didn't even know where the story was going in future seasons if they got them also that means maybe she just didn't perceive herself as the Earth's definition of gay. B. Even in the first season she made a comment about how she bought Lucy was gorgeous and hell she would date her. C. She made some comments about Irma and other woman that don't sound totally heterosexual and don't get me wrong women can admire the beauty and intelligence of other women without it being sexual but as a bisexual woman it just struck a cord in me you can tell the difference when it's coming from a straight woman mouth. Now on the subject of her and Lena strictly I do think there are instances of "queerbaiting"because just because you perceive they haven't been promised to us doesn't mean that some of us haven't picked up on things or the fact that they're simply queerbating because somehow they do hype up Kara and Lena to keep a nice chunk of the audience who ships them mainly those of the gay variety interested in the show which is also considered queerbaiting. Also the fact that they've been called sisters or family or my personal favorite "that's what friends are for"doesn't mean crap because honestly at this point the overuse of friends just sounds more like they're trying to convince themselves than us.*** Also I don't know about you but even on the basic level of things they've done I've never shown half those feelings towards my friends and the ones I have it's because I started to think of them as more than friends.

Now with Lena's sexuality no they have never shown her as anything besides straight canonically but don't get me wrong she totally sends off that college experimentation vibe especially with Andrea for some reason but that may just be me.

Number #7, my main point is let's just be kind to one another because guess what there is toxicity from every ship in a fandom there will always be shitty people on both sides and then there will be those of us who just want to see the characters together for one reason or another and yes I'm not afraid to admit that part of my reasons I want to see two gorgeous woman kiss sue me LOL.

Number #8, the conclusion of my rant is that how about we leave the hating to the ones who want to do that and the rest of us like adults or whatever your age is in the fandom that has any type of maturity behave because I truly do wish the best and in the end well I hope they end up together I'm realistic that they probably won't especially due to the CW Network motto of "homophobia and racism"because they've already broken up several good gay and interracial couples on that show. But at the end of the day my true wish is just that all of the characters end up happy and healthy.

Best of luck to all shippers out there anti and supercorp and or any other couple alike may we try to make it out of this with a modicum of sanity and even if they fail us we always have fanfiction thank you and good night.

[borat123]

Analysis Pro NH Anti NS

Naruto Manga Part 2

Part 6

Naruto comes back to the village after his Sage Training. He finds out that Pain has been looking for him and he has destroyed the village. Naruto is furious over what he has done and prepares to fight him, as he is the only one strong enough (with the help of Sage Mode). He has surpassed his previous generations, and is ready for his toughest battle yet. (I’ll wont be going over the battle as that’s not within the topic but i must say that it’s pretty frickin awesome).

As strong as he has become though, Pain is still too much for him and he is eventually defeated and pinned down by Pain. Naruto doesn’t have an answer to Pain’s question of how to achieve world peace. Naruto was losing hope, he was defeated and pinned down. He was about to give up and let Pain take him. Despair and hopelessness hits him as he didn’t have a better answer to Pain’s way of achieving peace. He had no hope of anyone going to save him, he had told them to not interfare in the battle. He was just about to be taken, but then......

Hinata jumps in attempting to save him. Naruto is in shock, he knows Pain is to much for anyone in the village to handle. Hinata declares that she wont let him lay another finger on Naruto. She had to hide behind a pole to talk to him in part 1 yet still managed to show that she understood him and bring him out of despair. But now she declares to the strongest enemy we have seen so far to not lay a finger on Naruto. She knows Pain is too strong for her, so she essentially prepares her final words to Naruto. Her statement about being selfish should NOT be taking literally, since it’s basically the most selfless act someone could do. What it really means is that she isn’t gonna run away anymore and let things remain hopeless, that during this moment she has become what she always wanted to be. Brave and strong and to never give up even if she keeps failing and things seems pointless and despairing. That’s why she’s not afraid to die, because she loves Naruto, but deeper than that, because at this moment she become what she always wanted to be.

Hinata starts her speech. Notice how Kishimoto zoomed in on Naruto’s eyes. Especially during the line ”i wanted to be with you”. Naruto’s eyes were shining and wide eyed. He treasured those words. Her speech touched him deeply, his reaction soon confirms this. Even Pain was paying attention (he knew some serious shit was going on).

Naruto is speechless. No one has ever said anything like this to him before. His whole life has been filled with nothing but hate and discrimination towards him. His whole life people have said ”dont go near him” ”you monster get away from me” ”i hate you, go die”. He was completly mesmerised even though he didn’t completly understand it. But deep down in his heart he did, and a reason why his amazement turned into complete and blind rage. Before i continue i just want to point something out here.

(Ignore the watermark lol)

Who were the ONLY ones that knew Naruto couldn’t fight Pain alone? His future MENTOR and his future WIFE. Just an interesting detail.

Hinata goes in to attack Pain. She reveals her own jutsu the Juho Soshiken. Pain uses a powerful Shinra Tensei and knocks her to the ground. Naruto witnessing all this screams out to Pain to stop just after he takes out his rod. Naruto’s despair is turning into rage. He wants to protect her so much, but he cant. He has ever since the chunnin exams during her fight with Neji. (Just an interesting detail that many people miss. The Juho Soshiken can shut down the opponents whole chakra network. This means that they cant use any ninjutsu if they get hit by hit. Pain could have just stabbed her like Madara easily did to Sakura, but he decided to use a powerful jutsu that has a drawback. This means that he felt threatened enough by her jutsu to use one of his most powerful jutsus. Pain actually felt more threatened by Hinata than Madara felt thretened by Sakura)

Pain compares Hinata’s death to how his loved ones were killed right before his eyes. His line ”Love breeds sacrifice, which breeds hatred” is actually referring to Hinata’s love for Naruto and Naruto’s love for her. Hinata’s sacrife (love) and Naruto’s hatred (love). Pain assumed that Hinata was the girl he loved and that his rage and hatred is responding to it. (He is right, he loved her subconsiously probably for years now, Pain is also a NaruHina shipper confirmed lol).

This was Naruto’s reaction to her death/stabbing.

Worst emotions he’d ever felt.

Written by Kishimoto himself. This is actually incredible when you consider what Naruto must have been through during his whole childhood.

I want to discuss something interesting here. To even achieve such a level of kyuubi rage, an incredible amount of negative emotions must be achieved which should not be underestimated. This is actually not the first time Naruto has triggered the kyuubi for Hinata (obviously not to this degree). During Neji’s mental attack on Hinata, Naruto was so enraged and angry that he was shaking and the kyuubi’s lips were displaying. He completly understood her situation as he also wanted to change himself. But seeing such a nice girl like Hinata (who at this point wanted to help him cheat to pass the test and gave him some healing ointment) being treated this way triggered a part of the kyuubi while he was trying to control his anger.

The second time was during his fight with Neji. While he was trying to summon kyuubi’s chakra he thought of Hinata (probably unknowingly) and his promise to her, and wishing for her to be watching him. My point is that Kishi had already established in part 1 that Hinata triggers very strong emotions to Naruto.

Also look at this cover for the Naruto Manga Volume 9:

Six scrolls and six tails. Was Kishimoto foreshadowing this moment? Or is it just a coincidence? Regardless really interesting stuff. Anyways that is all for now, here are the previous parts.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 7

[jenniferstolzer]

Babylon 5 rewatch Episode 2.22: The Fall of Night

Babylon 5 is at the center of not one but three conflicts as John Sheridan agrees to shelter a wounded Narn cruiser. The Centauri don’t like this. Earth doesn’t like this. The Shadows don’t like this. But Sheridan has a strong moral compass and what he doesn’t like is how much the institutions around him are willing to sacrifice in the name of forging some kind of cursory peace.

Things I liked about The Fall of Nighit

1, Lennier and Vir’s friendship. If you ask me Vir, could be friends with literally anyone. He’s such an understanding soul. Lennier is by nature a little judgey. More closed off. So when they sit down next to each other and discover how much they have in common both of them look at each other like “hello what” and automatically agree to meet again. But even this exchange is done almost like spies meeting and I don’t think we stop to think about that very often. These are the attaches of two ambassadors for two of the most powerful races in the galaxy… they could very well be exchanging state secrets instead of expressing solidarity for their equally frustrating jobs.

2,  The Centauri are apparently willing to put their ships on autopilot and black out from g forces if it means when they come to they’ll be in a better firing position. This seems extremely reckless and VERY Centauri. It is the spacebattle equivalent of the hair. Big. Flashy. Not well thought through.

3, In the wake of the mass driver bombing, Sheridan gives Londo an opportunity to speak and Londo is like “NOPE” and jets before he says something that’s going to get him and his whole race in more trouble than they already are. Garibaldi then reads Londo like a literal book, delivering one of my favorite analyses of the character. Everyone thought Londo was a clown, indulging in opulence, going into debt at the casino, drinking himself to a stupor in public, but Garibaldi was his friend and knows that Londo’s not dumb, he’s actually very smart and his mind moves really fast. His error is in his judgment and priorities and he’s currently in waters he did not expect to tread. He’s scared, and he’s going to keep darting in and out of cover until he feels like he has a handle on things or he gets picked off by a hunter, whichever comes first. Also a very classic JMS line “He’s a pain in the butt, but he’s our pain in the butt.” Hunt for that or similar lines in other JMS stuff, he loves that line.

4, The ache of watching McCarthysim at work is very effective. Zach knows the guys he’s ratting on don’t deserve to be ratted on and even says so. “They’re just fooling around” but we can tell by the level of interest and tone of the Nightwatch captian’s voice that they’re gonna get blackballed. Zach can’t deny that they said what they said, but can tell that ratting them out is the wrong thing to do. In the end he relents with a bunch of qualifications but the Nightwatch doesn’t want qualifications. They want names. Thank you for your service.

5, I love that the guy there to ally with the Centauri is from the Ministry of Peace. So poignant. They’ll get peace all right, by paying off the aggressors.  

6, When the Narn ship was coming under threat by the Centauri warship, Sheridan opened a line to Londo just to spit in his face and hang up. It was amazing. Also during this crisis, Sheridan whips out a law book to smack the Nightwatch guy back in his hole. Sinclair would be proud.

7, Watching B5 come under attack is so emotionally stirring. Even on a rewatch, I don’t want to see it hurt.

8, We have arrived! The scene where Kosh reveals himself. I love that G’Kar is hiding in the plants – like he���s not a huge gecko man who people are going to notice. I also love how plaintiff his voice is, thinking if he speaks on Sheridan’s behalf it’ll help him in the political shitshow he’s currently in. I mean he’s issuing this apology for helping a Narn ship and G’Kar is very very very grateful for that. Also B5 blew up a Centauri warship so he’s pretty grateful for that too, I mean come on… I like that B5 has like a standard subway system in the middle of it and that they let the Puppet Friends ride. I miss the puppet friends. I love that the rotational gravity system means there’s a weightless portion in the center of hydroponics and that we used that to our advantage in this story. Also the vorlons in their native form play on the perception of the lesser races. They are light beings, and humans see them as angels. The rest of the races see them as prophets or gods, but none of these perceptions are perfect. We see wings and white robes and think Angel, but Kosh didn’t appear like a rennaissance painting. He’s got a butterfly look to him, too. The face he wears is a facsimile of a human not an exact human. He’s not perfect, we’re just in awe. Love that.

9 And finally a lot has been said about why Londo doesn’t see anything when Kosh appears. He’s been touched by the Shadows, so he can’t be converted by the Vorlons b/c we’re playing a game of Othello today I guess. Maybe because he doesn’t actually believe in his pantheon of gods so he doesn’t have any deities to witness. Maybe he’s lying because what he saw was his own greed and vanity. The general consensus is the first – that he’s incapable of seeing the light because he’s in the dark. For a fresh take on it, let’s look at the Vorlons through this lens. Kosh said before that if he revealed himself everyone would know him… I take this as being a side effect of being Vorlon. Vorlons are a feeling not an image. Like Magenta. Magenta’s not a real color, it exists on the color wheel because something has to connect red and purple on the color spectrum… but the spectrum of visible light is actually a straight line. The wavelengths for red and purple are far from touching, but our brains can perceive when they’re both present, so Magenta occurs. It’s imaginary, but we see it for real with our eyes. That’s Vorlons. Perhaps Londo saw a shapeless light thing in the sky, perhaps that’s what Vorlons really are… or perhaps they have no visible representation at all until they hit our brains. Our eyeballs behold something, but our brains have to construct it out of pieces. When the rest of the galaxy looked at Kosh they used the color wheel to construct him, but Londo was only given the wavelengths. He saw nothing, because nothing was there to see. I really wish there was another Centauri there to be like “I saw the goddess Li welcoming me to her arms!” and Londo’s over there like “I’m the problem” instead of not really answering that question. Maybe it’s answered in season 3, I don’t know. Did Vir see anyone up there? He must have been on break.

What I like Less about 22

1, So here’s where I’m going to talk about Keffer. I know the origin story…. that he was an unwelcome addition to the cast added per network request, but who the hell is he other than that? I think its remarkable how he slips right out of my head the minute he is off camera. We know he’s a pilot, that he was close to Carlos (whose story/death you may recall I was laughing at in a previous episode because its significance ALSO came out of nowhere), and that he made friends with the GROPOS grunts (who we incidentally learned to care about enough in that one episode that we were sad when they died…. Awkward considering Keffer’s contribution to this episode…) Honestly the most interesting thing about him is that he’s got an old-timey fighter pilot scarf he wears and he believes in ghosts and I bet you all forgot about the ghosts. Honestly, the most interesting thing about Keffer is how he’s a lesson in how not to write an interesting character – and no shade on JMS for that, I know he did it on purpose. Significant things happening to a character does not automatically make them a strong character. Keffer experienced loss, came face to face with the shadows, got in fights… a lot of stuff happened to him, but he was almost always the only named character in those scenes. We cared about the GROPOS because they cared about each other and we responded to that. Keffer was there to play cabbage head and ask questions. He’s not tight with any of our main cast who we’ve had tons more time to grow attached to, and dies for plot reasons without leaving an impact with his loss. Heck, you can see the value of interpersonal relationships on character development in action when the show used a shoehorn to try and force some in in context to Carlos a second and a half before he died. We had him drinking at the bar with command staff suddenly, we had him die as a result of a flight mission Sheridan was part of to make Sheridan feel guilty about it. Everyone was standing around going like “No, Not Ramirez” and if you recall on my previous episode writeup I was LAUGHING at how tortured this sudden human connection was. Keffer could have been made interesting. Follow me on this.

My treatment on how to make Keffer interesting:

Let’s say Keffer was introduced as an old friend of one of our characters – Fraknlin let’s say. He was a friend from the Minbari War days that helped him sneak behind enemy lines. Perhaps he was complicit in the covering up and destruction of Franklin’s notes on Minbari anatomy. As a result, the two hang out in medbay sometimes, talking about old times and comparing the current war to the one they fought together. We learn that Keffer has a fire for justice. Hates bullies. Sees the strong as absolute defenders of the weak and that any stronger race picking on a weaker one is a bigger coward than the unvierse can hold. Then when Carlos gets killed by the ghost he starts researching what it could be. Kosh and Delenn tell him to stay out of it. The audience assumes he’s going to uncover something and bring Franklin and other characters into Delenn and Sheridan’s confidence about the shadows through curiosity and honor, but we’re learning through the episodes that the Shadows are IMMENSELY powerful and have no patience for flies. When he breaks off from his squad to go have a looksee at what he suspects led to his personal friend Carlos’s death, we know this is going to kill him. He ignores the warnings of those who have more awareness and dies to bring back evidence of the Shadows to the station. Sheridan recognizes how Keffer’s curiosity and sense of judgment led to recklessness, something Sheridan himself is prone to. He vows not to let Keffer die in vain, but also states that the proof he got has changed everything… and that Sheridan would have done the same. Killing your men in the name of a mission is never the goal but there’s a line everyone crosses when the safety of the universe is at stake and sometimes things are worth dying for. Franklin walks into medbay, casts a look to the counter where Keffer used to sit all those nights, and turns away.

But that’s not what happen. Keffer’s dead now and I don’t miss him. Glad he emailed the Shadows to ISN five nanoseconds before he died.

Babylon 5 is now the last best hope for victory because sometimes peace is another word for surrender and because secrets have a way of getting out. On to season 3!

[lizacstuff]

Liza that 3rd fragman 👀 "if I was born a 100 times I'd fall in love with you everytime" Eda saying this is their last obstacle and nothing can separate them, serkan's "I'll be right back, close your eyes I'm here" If this isn't all a red flag for shits about to hit the fan then I don't know what is LOL (but also how cute to Edser look and them telling each other they love each other very much 😭😭😭)

That fragman is both the SWEETEST and the MOST OMINOUS thing I’ve ever seen. ALL AT ONCE.  

Friends... we’re gonna go through some things.  That being said, everything is going to be great. These writers have been solid so far, and I have faith they have come up with something really interesting to increase the longevity of this show. And I don’t know about you, but I’m prepared to go through some things if it means keeping Eda and Serkan for longer.  (I heart them)

This show is about Eda and Serkan and their love story, at it’s core it’s a comedy, it will all lead to happy things, but... yeah, buckle up! 

I have a lot of asks both about the fragman and last ep, so I’m going to answer a bunch under the cut. 

Anonymous said: The fandom theories about episode 28 have gotten so wild that I literally think the most shocking thing would be if they actually got married and were not separated (emotionally or physically). What if the earlier painful episodes were to make us believe that things couldn't possibly go right in 28 and it's a reverse psychology trick?

You could be right!  I like your thinking. I checked on twitter and I had to back away slowly. The juvenile temper tantrums were too much for me today.  

Look, I think it’s clear something big is coming. It has to, there has to be something that shakes up the show. Some of the theories are more upsetting and catastrophic than others, but the writers won’t do anything that dings either character or their love for one another.  Whatever happens will showcase the connection between these two and the chemistry between the actors, that’s the point of everything, and anything that does those things is gonna be a-okay with me. 

@jan31​ Hi Liza. Do you think we are going to see the wedding in 28 or they will leave it on a cliffhanger for next week. Lots of theories going round mainly cos of Neslihan saying new dimensions coming in episode 29, which could just mean married life etc. I have seen suggestions of memory loss, it's all a dream since episode one. I would personally love Eda to wake up like in episode one but for it to be a total turn around and she is the boss and Serkan the employee. Eda being robot yildiz appeals to me!!! I know it will never happen but leave me here with my dreams!!

I started the day at 90% sure they’ll be married in 28/29, but now I’m down to like 30% that they’ll get married in these episodes. I really, really want them to get married before whatever happens happens, because every scenario I can think of for this reset or starting again, seems like it would be better if they were married.  

However, the shooting spoilers from today, make me question that. Namely the videos where Hande appears to still be wearing the ring on her right hand. We shall see, that could be for many reasons. 

Honestly, though, I wouldn’t hate a memory loss storyline. Seeing one of them (and Serkan’s line in the trailer makes it seem like it might be him) lose their memory and have to fall in love all over again? There are worse fates for a shipper than getting to experience that all again but in a different way.  

Anonymous said: Your response to the fandom drama anon was so good, it's exactly how I feel. While I don't know what the old posts that were like are (that's shady as fuck) I did see all the other drama go down and wow. The actresses def need to stay in their lane and some of the fans, hoooo boy, it's obvious they're young based off their reactions alone. Had to unfollow some people once I realized what they were like. Also some of the IRL shipping reminded me of col*fer stuff, reading into everything and blowing it out of proportion (which then gets picked up by paps....). But you're right in that at least the show related drama is tame compared to OUAT. But still, people being too careless even while they know the paps see everything and harass Kerem and hande (omg did you see the video of hande the other day stopped in the van and she looked so overwhelmed 😔)

You’re referencing this post here about yesterday’s drama. 

Today Neslihan made it worse by addressing everything and claiming she didn’t like all those Hande-bashing posts because... wait for it... she was HACKED. Oy. Hackers got in and went back two years to like gross posts about Hande? Sure, Jan. While I don’t believe that for a second, I guess that at least gives her cover with Hande so they can all pretend it’s true and move on so it’s not awkward on set.  But, yikes, she needs to consult a publicist, she took a narrative that was circulating in certain circles in fandom and made sure all her followers were aware. Not very savvy. 

As for the paps coming after Hande, yes I did see her in the car, she did look overwhelmed. Back off vultures!!! That’s why I think Kerem sometimes throws himself to the wolves so that doesn’t happen. She always handles them like a pro, but you can tell she’d rather be anywhere else on earth than talking to them. 

The pap stuff is worse than I’ve seen before, they’re like vultures circling for any conjecture (sometimes made up out of thin air) they can turn into a question and blame fans. OUAT actors dealt with nothing like this. Also I can’t believe they never ask about the show. Like after last week? They could legit ask about the sex scene which probably would have given them some angle on the actors that they wanted, (especially since it was too hot for Turkish TV) but they let that pass them by, and instead asked the same questions about being together that they never answer. Dumbasses. They are not only awful people, they are awful at their jobs. 

In Van, the paps pay off crew members for info, they always know more than fans. Also I don’t remember stars of my shows getting this level of tabloid attention before. Except for on Riverdale, Lili and Cole generated that level of interest, and while I didn’t pay terribly close attention to them, I feel like they rarely talked to the paps, were just photographed. Also I don’t suspected the CW of calling the paps on them, but I suspect either the network or production company of sometimes calling them on Hande and Kerem. 

Anonymous said: Do you think it’s weird that they didn’t touch the kidnapping at all in either trailer? They might not have filmed it in time for the 1st one but certainly the 2nd. And I’m definitely not complaining about the ones we got because its like a fairytale but the kidnapping was the cliffhanger...? 🧐 I think they should’ve just left the princes storyline at “he went back to his country” but then they didn’t so......

If they’d left his story at just going back to his country, then the Prince really wouldn’t have served his purpose. He was brought on to cause some sort of trouble, so they probably need him to cause the trouble before he goes, lets hope it ends with this kidnapping!

And to answer your question, yes, I do think it’s weird that neither trailer touched on it. On any other show I’d think it was a huge red flag, but on this show maybe not as much because  a) there’s obviously a lot of romance in this episode, it’s not crazy that they are focusing on that to draw people in with the promos  b) this show likes to do cliffhangers that end up being no big deal, that happens a lot.  

Who knows it could turn out to be a big deal that shapes the rest of the episode in some unexpected way (Eda’s captured the whole episode and she’s dreaming about wedding prep, or... who knows) but I think it’s more likely that they resolve in the first 5-10 minutes and then move on.  Since we know from the summary (not that I trust those) that Serkan goes on the bachelor weekend, it feels like the Prince is taken care of prior to that. I don’t think he’d leave her alone for a second if there was a chance the Prince was still a threat. Perhaps Babaanne is pissed he tried to kidnap Eda and tells them she’ll handle it herself???

Anonymous said: Semiha not being in the promo is highkey suspicious. The actress is promoting the episode lol. She's about to Evil Queen this wedding ceremony but you know what, I'm fine with whatever she has planned if they end up married at the end of the day. What's funny is that since a lot of fans these days will assume that there will be shocking negative plot twists, not actually having one here would be a plot twist so I hope the writers keep them together for whatever's next haha

You’re not wrong, at this point, having this wedding take place would be a shocking twist for all of us!  As for Semiha... hmmm... it will be interesting to see what her reaction is to Eda being kidnapped by her pick of suitor. Serkan Bolat might be the son of the man indirectly responsible for her parents death, but he would never hurt her. Take note, Grandbag!  

Anonymous said: Do you mind sharing your speculative scenarios?

After the trailer today, I don’t know if I can even remember some of them. 

Memory loss

Grandma forces Serkan to choose between Eda and his company/wealth,  he chooses Eda and they start over from scratch with nothing

Time jump

AU starting over, showing a different path they might have taken together

Dream

These actors playing different characters in a new story

I don’t think the last three are likely, but they did spring to mind after some of Neslihan’s teases. 

Anonymous said: So this show doesn't get like fantastic ratings (it actually seems to be on the lower end compared to all other dizis airing) but the social media engagement is off the charts. Why is that?!? Is the show just extraordinarily popular internationally? or that this is a "shipping" show? I'm floored by the numbers - its like no other show/fandom is even trying

The ratings were terrific during the summer. But to your point, it has a huge fandom both in Turkey and internationally, but it’s worth noting that most of those charts you see where it beats every other show in every imaginable social metric is just for Turkey.  

It’s one of those lightning in a bottle situations where you get the right property and the right actors together at the right time and magic happens.  And, for sure, the number one reason is the shipping. Shipping drives fandom engagement, and a fantastic ship with a juicy, fun, tropey love story is what this show offers. It also offers up two extremely attractive, talented, likeable leads with off-the-charts chemistry (plus the added speculation about an off-camera relationship that has intrigued more than a few fans, tabloids and gossip sites and fueled interest) who have done a good job of building the fanbase through their social media engagement. Plus the timing is part of it as well. I don’t know about you, but this show hit the spot during this pandemic and the horror of 2020. We all needed this escape. 

Anonymous said:Do you think something happened in the writers room after the backlash of 25 and fan disappointment after Ayse's announcement? I feel like a switch flipped and now we're in fanficland with how much good content we've gotten in these last two episodes. Like I thought maybe they should wrap up the series soon before the characters got completely off the tracks but they may be finding their groove now and I'm interested to see what their next twist is after they can write out Balca/Seymen.

I don’t know about a switch flip, this show has been fanfic land since the first episode!  The tropes! That is how I described it to multiple people when I first started watching: an AU fanfic come to life.

As for the writing changes, no, I don’t think backlash after 25 affected 26 or 27, because 26 was already 90% shot, and 27 already written. However, I assume they themselves could tell that 25 got just too dark and had strayed pretty far from the DNA of the series. While I didn’t think it was bad, it was not fun to watch and this show ought to be fun to watch. 

Let’s hope, however, that the backlash affects future episodes in that they know what works... and what doesn’t.  The last two episodes definitely felt reminiscent of the first batch of episodes. Light, funny, romantic. If they can keep that tone... I’ll be thrilled.

Anonymous said: i didn't realize how much i missed "together" edser until watching 27.. it's been so long since they were "officially" together and we also had such few episodes of it.. ppl have been comparing it to 12 and while in some ways i agree, edser are always so different here than they were there. 12 was them navigating their new relationship.. they were more shy and finding their footing.. here they are very much established, as they should be after knowing their love for so long in comparison to 12!

Yes, it was lovely. You know I’ve preached a lot about how even though Eda and Serkan were broken up, they’ve still been together all this time. And it’s true, but there is something about them truly being together that is magical. We never got enough of that the first time around (a writing mistake in my opinion) and they’re so good together it’s lovely to watch. 

Anonymous said: Serkan not asking for help from Balca when asking his team for help with the marriage gifts preparations and refusing her offer of help when she asked made me so happy. Good job Serkan! He's learning! She's not trustworthy!

Yes, that was a good moment. And he was eyeing her very warily when she offered. The thing I don’t understand is how has no one caught on that she’s working with Babaanne? That entire office is filled with nosy people, has no one remarked on the number of times Balca has gone up to the office or they’ve disappeared for lunch at the same time? Come on Leyla! Come on Melo! Notice these things!  

Anonymous said: Fingers crossed that we finally make progress towards getting rid of Seiman & Balca now that all the girls were drugged and Eda was put in the car in the last episode. Unless Seiman has a change of heart and takes Eda back inside before anyone wakes & the guys get there then the show has to address it. Although I do not think Balca is going to back down unless Serkan straight up tells her he has zero interest in her and never will. Totally fine if that happens in the next episode.

Will Balca backdown even if she’s humiliated like that? She’s so delusional I’m not sure. What I am sure is that she’s dangerous. This came in before we saw the other two fragmans that have no mention of the kidnapping. Hard to picture how that is so easily resolved. Unless she frees herself (which seems unlikely in her groggy state) or maybe Melo’s future boyfriend is able to stop it before they get far?  Or I don’t know. I just know that I want to see Serkan lose his mind and all the other characters see Serkan lose his mind and then I want it to be over. LOL.

Anonymous said: As much as I am loving everything Edser, I cannot wait for Seiman, Balca and Grandma to be gone. And I am even more annoyed to think that the show might try to redeem all 3 characters. All 3 of them are truly awful people and no need to waste air time trying to make the audience think any different. Just my opinion...🤷🏻‍♀️. Show please finally expose those 3 for the psychos they are and get rid of them.

Bye bitches!  I don’t think there’s any redemption for Balca and Seiman. They both have poisoned/dosed people, hard to come back from that.  And there is no need to redeem them because neither is compelling enough to be a long-term character. But maybe Granny, we probably will see a redemption arc for her. 

Anonymous said: i know you were worried a few weeks ago that with ayse leaving as writer, we probably wouldn't have the same sort of comedy as previous episodes... but istg the whole kiz isteme scene, especially with chef alex, had me almost crying with laughter. especially when serkan off the cuff just goes "well if that's an option..." to everyone misunderstanding alex "wanting" ayfer for 2 nights and then eda ready to beat him with the flowers he bought her... comedic gold lmao.

SO GOOD! I was thrilled to see that sort of comedy, the sort of comedy we’d come to expect, from these writers. I think it bodes very well indeed!  

That scene was amazing. I know Neslihan said that much of it was improvised. Probably that line from Serkan (since Serkan is SO out-of-his-mind in love I’m not sure he could even joke about having Eda only two nights a week! LOL) was improv from Kerem, and Aydan asking about the other nights, and Seyfi bringing up the weekend. And Eda’s very Hande-esque “Ser-KAN.” 

I just love rewatching that scene and checking out everyone who is breaking character and just losing it. Cagri most of all. He’s blurred aback there but you can see Ferit spends the whole time laughing or trying to stifle a laugh. Reminds me of Cagri in the scene in 18 when they’re watching the security footage he was losing it in that scene as well. 

Anonymous said: i'm scared - I think they are really about to give us all of these happy EdSer scenes only to have something happen RIGHT before the wedding ceremony due to Babaanne. Based on the last episode, I don't think there's any chance of a breakup (knock on wood) but what if Serkan gets arrested, goes to jail for 2 years, and we get a time jump?

This was sent before the last two teasers, so yes I think something is gonna happen. We shall see!  I don’t really think Serkan going to jail for 2 years is in the cards, at least I hope not!  Besides if Babaanne did that she would have no hopes of ever reconciling with Eda, so that seems unlikely she’d follow through and leave him there for so long a time. 

Anonymous said: With the last week's sex scene, they did a lot of fade outs but the scene was basically still there so it wasn't much wasted effort for the actors. But for what they're teasing in episode 28 - idk how they can get away with showing them in the shower at all if Serkan lifting Eda with her clothes on had required blurring? Is Eda dropping her robe even pushing it? It's intriguing indeed.

Great questions. We’re 36 hours from finding out (well I'm longer than that because I wait for the English subs, hee hee) All I know is I want to see these scenes.. one way or another!