#halfway through my writing goal for this chapter

[cha1cedony]

Sigh. Tomorrow. I'll do more. tomorrow 🥲

[hondayota]

Chapters: 8/15 Fandom: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater, Dreamer Trilogy - Maggie Stiefvater Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Ronan Lynch/Adam Parrish, Richard Gansey III/Blue Sargent, Jordan/Declan Lynch, Adam Parrish & Blue Sargent, Richard Gansey III & Ronan Lynch, Hennessy & Ronan Lynch Characters: Ronan Lynch, Adam Parrish, Richard Gansey III, Blue Sargent, Jordan (Dreamer Trilogy), Hennessy (Dreamer Trilogy), Noah Czerny, Joseph Kavinsky, Orphan Girl | Opal, Declan Lynch, Matthew Lynch Additional Tags: Light Angst, Slow Burn, the sandman au, where ronan is dream and adam is hob, do not need to have watched the sandman to understand, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, characters have been slightly aged up, might be slightly ooc sorry, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Eye Trauma, Kavinsky/Corinthian is his own warning, Blood and Violence Summary:

“I don’t understand why someone would want an eternity on this earth,” Ronan said, turning away. He didn’t want to think about the man’s hands, almost boyish, calloused, long fingers and bony knuckles, or his smile, a casual thing, lips turning up in a false laugh at a bad joke. His name was Adam Parrish. Ronan didn’t want to think about that name, how the letters fit on his tongue, how it would sound out of his mouth.

 A Sandman AU where Ronan is the Greywaren, King of Dreams and Nightmares, Adam Parrish is a human granted immortality, and they meet every 100 years. Centuries-long pining ensues.

[writer-logbook]

How to get back into writing: a 5-steps guide

As someone who hasn't written anything in a decade, this is what I did to get back into writing seriously.

Identify which archetype of writer fits me better. You may have heard George R.R. Martin saying there are two types of writers: gardeners and architects. Whether you believe in that statement or not isn't relevant per se, but the actual meaning behind that point is that you need to get to know yourself as a writer, how you work, what you need, etc., so you can adapt your environment to achieve your goals. Speaking of which…Gentle reminder : you're a person not a robot. You are allowed to work the way you want to, and not to follow whatever pieces of advice that are linked to these archetypes.

Set a realistic word count/session I can stick to over the long term. When you're a 9-6 office employee, it's not always easy to find time to write and sometime our day at work got the very best of us. Having that in mind, I set my word count up to 200-500 words per session or 1 chapter per week (they're rather small in my case). Gentle reminder : babysteps are better than no-step at all.

If I'm not writing, fine, I'll do some research or anything else. Your story will always require something from you. When I'm not in the mood for writing, there are two options : forcing myself or doing what I call para-writing. For instance it's : reading articles or books about improving my writing style, improving my worldbuilding, drawing a map of my city etc. This are not things that would appear in the novel but it would guide me throughout the process the way a walking-stick would do for an injured man. Gentle reminder : you always find something useful to do but at the end of the day, you still have to write.

Have a general idea of what I want to tell. I won't lie, I've plotted my entire novel from the very beginning to the very end, which means I know exactly what to write and when. If you're against having a defined plot, I'm no one to judge, but having at least the key events or the major points will definitely help you. Like a lighthouse, it will help you navigate through the mists of confusion or hesitation. Gentle reminder : It's better to know where to go even if you end up losing yourself along the journey. Having the map doesn't mean you have to follow it, but rather when you can allow yourself to take a step to the side.

Write something I enjoy. A bit cliché I admit, but it's the best advice I could give. You'll spend hours, days, weeks - even years !- on that story so better buckle up to something you really want to write. Otherwise the risk is to abandon that hard-work you've done halfway through the process. No one needs that frustration and that self-doubting questionnings. No one. Not you. Not even me. Gentle reminder : it's okay to want readers and reviews but I promise you, your writing will be really different on something you trully want to share...Remember how pissful it was to write an essay for class you didn't want to ?

[wordsnstuff]

Hey, so i'm working on my first WIP, and i wanted to ask about drafting. When can one consider their first draft done? Does it have to have the goal word count (ie; 100K), or would being about halfway there be considered a good enough first draft, that i can move on to the second and start editing?

Concluding each stage of the writing process

It's difficult to know when a phase of a writing project has concluded and you're ready to focus on a new objective as it's developing. I tend to approach my writing projects with a clear and uniform trajectory, regardless of how diverse my projects can be. This approach allows me to remain focused, thorough, and reassured that I am covering all my bases in an organized fashion. However, it also maintains space for me to be explorative and intuitive when necessary. In regards to word count, I don't think it's entirely relevant unless you're determined to adhere to strict genre conventions. Give your story the space it needs and not an extra inch.

(Optional) Zero Draft

In this phase, you're telling yourself the story. You're doing it quickly, messily, intuitively, and forgivingly. Explore every idea that glows in the dark for you, don't throw anything away or discount any possibility. Exhaust your imagination in this phase so that when you reach the first draft, you know you're making informed decisions.

First Draft

You're crafting the structure and core elements of the story. This is often the phase of discovery. You're becoming acquainted with your characters and how they interact, you're beginning to feel at home in the world and settings you've built, and you're seeing all sides of the conflict as it evolves. The goal here is settle on a beginning, middle, and end point, and by the end of this process you want to know your characters' motivations and relationships inside and out.

Second Draft

Go back quickly through the first draft and address any points where you got stuck, where you compromised for the sake of carrying on to the end, and fill in any apparent blanks. The first time you really iron something out, there will always be a few pesky creases. This is the time to find and flatten them.

Third Draft

This is where you question everything. Identify and scrutinize your decisions, dive into the "curtains are blue" discussions with yourself, and begin to tidy up things like grammar, clumsy dialogue, over-poured descriptions, and dubious vocabulary. Comb through each paragraph and be brutal, prioritizing clarity and intentionality of how you've told the story.

The Read Through

This is the point where I recommend doing three things:

Letting it rest away from you for 1-3 months so that you can return to it with a bit of unfamiliarity and new perspective.

Hand it off to a couple of trusted readers and give them ample time to read, digest, and craft some feedback

Reread the project once all the way through making no changes (although annotations are acceptable)

Fourth Draft

Finishing touches. Vigorously and meticulously scrub and scrape between the lines and imagine giving it to your worst enemy. If you can imagine any mean (but valid) things they could conceive of to say about it, this is the time to grapple with or fix those details.

Additional Resources

Guide to Drafting

Word Count/Productivity Tracker Spreadsheet

Balancing Detail & Development

Writing The First Chapter

Writing The Middle of Your Story

Powering Through The Zero-Draft Phase

Writing The Last Chapter

Chapter Length

Happy drafting,

x Kate

[thompsborn]

“He dreams of people who have died and wonders if they miss him, too.”

literally why has no one TRACKED ME DOWN and PHYSICALLY PUNCHED ME becuase of the emotional turmoil this fic causes. i’m in PAIN. i’m also VERY proud of the fact that i wrote this but also it HURTS

“Iron Man suits double as caskets and Queens is a synonym with gravestones bearing the names of his only family” and other shit i wrote into homeward bound and COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT to the point that rereading homeward bound from the start and coming across this line made me GASP in PAIN

[magicalmysteries777]

"You're clueless, you know that?" - Reader x Eddie Munson & Reader x Steve Harrington (fake)

Summary: You agree to accompany Steve to Enzo's for Valentine's Day with only one shared goal in mind - to make Eddie so jealous he has no choice but to have the one conversation he's being avoiding.

Pairings: F!Reader x Steve Harrington & F!Reader x Eddie Munson.

Chapter: 1 of 1.

W/C: 2314.

A/N: Happy Valentines Day, besties! This trope paired with Steve and Eddie has had me in a chokehold for a while now and I'm so happy that the lil ADHD gremlin in my brain has finally let me write the damn thing. <3

This one-shot can also be found on AO3 here.

“You really think that’ll work? Pretending to go on a date with you?” you asked, leaning against the counter at Family Video.

“It better work. Personally, I’m sick of hearing you pine over him. He’s had a thing for you ever since you joined Hellfire but he’s completely clueless when it comes to all the hints you’ve dropped,” Robin chimed in without looking up from the ‘returns’ pile of videotapes she was sorting through.

Clueless didn’t even begin to cut it.

You’d known about Eddie’s crush on you for months now, ever since Dustin slipped up and spilled the beans at lunch one day. The poor kid made you swear on your own life that you wouldn’t tell Eddie you knew.

True to your word, you kept the secret and began dropping hints instead. Eddie couldn’t read the room to save his life.

Any time you caught him staring, he’d break eye contact before you could smile back at him. Any time your hands accidentally touched, he’d move his hand away and play it off if you didn’t keep your hand perfectly still.

“I think it’s perfect,” Steve smiled. “There’s nothing like a bit of jealously to make you realise what you want.”

“I dunno,” you mumbled, chewing your cheek while you weighed up your options.

“When he sees you all dolled up, thinking it’s for me, the dots will connect. Trust me.”

“Fine, I’ll find out when he’s working.”

-

Steve’s plan had been in the back of your mind the whole time you’d been sitting around the table with your fellow Hellfire members. It was a long game of highs and lows all night. Despite the distraction, you’d manage to come out of the battle victorious with a mere five health points left. The party, albeit a little bruised and battered, was one step closer to defeating Myrkul and Eddie was in a good mood.

It took the usual fifteen minutes to pack up Eddie’s maps, dice, tokens, and other various game pieces before you climbed into the passenger side of his van. “Sorry for the mess,” Eddie apologised.

“You say that every week and yet you never clean it.”

“I do, it just gets messy again,” he smirked.

You were halfway home when you glanced over at Eddie. His hair was frizzy, sticking up in places from all the near misses in battle where he’d had his hands running through it. The rings on his left hand were glowing gently from the reflection of his lit cigarette as he used it to control the steering wheel. His right hand was methodically fiddling with the busted cassette player that he’d been meaning to fix for months. As always when Eddie was concentrating, his tongue was sticking out and resting against his top lip.

“Got it!” he exclaimed as Rainbow in the Dark started blasting from the speaker, a huge grin spread across his face.

“When are you going to buy a new one?” you chuckled, prodding at the battered box.

“Stop touching it,” he slapped your hand away. “It’ll start crackling again. I’ve picked up some overtime next weekend, I’m hoping the gents will be tipping big to impress their dates.”

“No Valentine’s plan with anyone special then?”

“Nope, just work. Doubt there’s anyone out there who would want to spend their Valentine’s Day with the ‘Freak of Hawkins’ anyway.”

“You’d be surprised, some people like their men a little freaky.”

“What about you? Any plans?” he asked, the change in tone rather subtle.

For a moment, you weren’t sure if you were going to go through with the plan. Steve’s words echoed through your mind listed the pros and cons. ‘Trust me.’

“Yeah, I’ve got a date at Enzo's. At least I don’t have to worry about it going bad now if you’re working, you can come over and scare him off for me.”

“That’s great. Wow, a date. Um, yeah, I’ll fend him off for you if things go pear-shaped. Do I, uh, know the guy?” he stuttered.

“I don’t want to jinx it,” you answered, remembering Robin's claims that a little bit of mystery would be the key to the whole plan working.

“Of course,” Eddie agreed, a sarcastically dumb look plastered on his face. You couldn’t help but notice that this was exactly how he used to act when Dustin mentioned Steve. “Would you look at that? Here we are. Once again, dropped off in one piece, as requested.”

“You okay, Ed?” you ask, one eyebrow raised.

“Yep. Fine. Tired,” he mumbled through an unconvincing yawn. “Long game. I’m gonna go and, uh, get some sleep. Night.”

-

“And he said it exactly like that?” Steve asked.

“Yes, Steve, how many times do I have to go through it? He basically kicked me out of the van,” you answered.

“It’s definitely working.”

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent. Wait until he finds out it’s me, he’s gonna freak.”

“He might not react at all. Believe it or not, he is professional at work.”

“Bet on it?”

“Shut up.”

-

Eddie had been an asshole all week.

Jeff and Gareth got the worst of it. You, however, had been getting the silent treatment. It was Thursday lunchtime when Eddie finally acknowledged you again.

“So, what are your plans this weekend?” Dustin asked Mike.

“Movies with El then dinner, you?”

“Arcade with Will. What about you, Eddie?”

“Work and band, why?”

“It’s called small talk,” Dustin answered. “What is with you this week?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” he snapped.

“Tell your face that, man,” added Jeff.

“Lay off it. Why don’t you ask her what she’s doing this weekend instead and leave me alone?” Eddie prompted, gesturing in your direction. He did not stick around to hear the answer, walking away dramatically.

“Well, what are you doing?” asked Dustin.

“I’ve got a date,” you answered quickly and quietly, sinking into your seat as a sense of guilt began to creep up on you.

“You what?!” asked Gareth.

“I said I’ve got a date.”

“Yeah, I heard you. The fuck do you mean you’ve got a date? With who?”

“Does it matter?” you ask asked.

“Evidently it does. I’ve been taking the brunt of his crap all week and you’re telling me it’s because you’re going on a date?”

“How was I supposed to know he’d react like this?” you quickly try to defend yourself.

“Are you blind?” Jeff asks.

“No, but he is. I’ve dropped hints. Lots of them. If he doesn’t want to acknowledge it then that’s on him.”

-

“Wow,” smiled Steve, looking you up and down. He took your hand, albeit rather dramatically, and began leading you to the car.

“Save it for the restaurant, you dingus. Does this look okay then?” you ask.

“The dress alone might kill him, never mind the heels and hair.”

Ten minutes later, Steve parked up outside Enzo's.

“When we get in there, sit with your back to the bar. You’re about to get the full Harrington charm, okay?” he asked.

“Got it.”

“Hi there, table for two under Harrington,” Steve told the hostess.

“Follow me.”

“Here we are,” the hostess said as she gestured to a small table. “Here are your menus, the waiter will be over to take your order shortly.”

“Thank you,” you replied, taking the seat that Steve had pulled out for you.

“So,” you began.

“So,” Steve replied with a grin.

“I’m not going to lie, Steve, I feel really awkward.”

“I can tell,” he responded. “Relax. We’re just two friends, dressed up, and having a nice meal. Loosen up a little and have fun, or this isn’t going to work.”

You tried to relax, really, you did. But you couldn’t help shake the feeling that Eddie was burning holes into the back of your head with his staring.

“Welcome to Enzo's, my name is Ruben and I’ll be your server this evening. Any drinks to start?”

“Sparkling water for me, and…” Steve prompted.

“Lemonade, please.”

“Awesome, I’ll get that put in at the bar for you. Any starters today?”

“Do you-” Steve began, turning his attention back to you.

“More of a dessert person,” you answer.

“Me too,” smiled Ruben. “What mains would you like?”

“Lasagne for me, please,” answered Steve.

“Chicken Alfredo, please.”

“Awesome. I’ll get all that put in for you, enjoy your evening.”

“Thank you, ‘preciate that,” Steve told him before he left the table.

After a couple of minutes of the usual “how was work?” and “how was school?” small talk, Steve’s gaze quickly shot behind you as he sat up a little bit straighter.

“Here’s your lemonade,” Eddie announced, placing the glass down in front of you.

“Thanks, Eddie. How’s your shift?” you asked with a smile.

“So-so. Started going downhill about twenty minutes ago,” he answered.

“Nothing worse than a shitty Friday shift,” Steve chimed in.

“Evening rush,” Eddie responded, unwilling to meet Steve’s gaze. “Everything okay over here?”

“Great, thank you,” you respond.

“Harrington,” Eddie muttered, placing Steve’s water in front of him with a little bit more force than he did the lemonade, before heading back to the bar.

“He won’t even look at me, this is working even better than I thought,” Steve chuckled.

-

One hour and one chicken alfredo later, Ruben returned.

“Well you two are looking cosy over here,” he told you. Steve had been giving you cues on how to sit and when to laugh all evening. “How about that dessert? I highly recommend the ‘brownie and ice cream for two.’ Chef special tonight.”

“Sounds perfect,” answered Steve.

“Alrighty, that’ll be about ten to fifteen minutes. Any more drinks?”

“The same again, please,” you answer.

A couple of minutes later, Steve gave another instruction.

“Rest your left arm on the table.”

“What?”

“Now.”

Steve let out a sudden laugh and adjusted himself in his seat. He placed his arm on the table, his fingertips slightly brushing against your own.

A loud crashing noise from behind you had heads rolling to see what was going on. Every pair of eyes in the restaurant landed on Eddie.

“Sorry folks,” he announced. Eddie quickly began picking up the larger shards of glass whilst another bartender brought over cloths and a broom.

“Hook, line, and sinker,” Steve whispered, loud enough for only you to hear.

-

You really were getting the full Harrington charm, as promised. Steve had been feeding you brownie on and off for ten minutes, his glancing over to Eddie quickly now and again.

“It’s almost time,” Steve whispered.

“Time for what?”

“The grand finale.”

Steve leaned in slightly and wiped the side of your mouth gently with his thumb. “Ice cream,” he smirked.

“Is that really necessary?”

“One hundred percent. On my cue, you’re going to excuse yourself to go to the bathroom,” he began.

“But-”

“If this whole fake date has gone to plan, which by the way has been lovely, then I do believe Munson won’t let you make it that far. Go now.”

As instructed, you excused yourself from the table and made your way towards the bathroom. Just as you got to the door you felt a hand close softly around your wrist.

“Hey, can we talk?” Eddie asked.

“Everything okay?”

“No, actually, it’s not,” he answered. Eddie glanced around before pulling you through a door labelled ‘staff only’.

“Eddie, wha-”

“You can’t date Steve.”

“I can date whoever I like Eddie,” you respond.

“Why him?” he asked, his hand still wrapped lightly around your wrist.

“Why not?”

“Because,” he began, pausing in thought. “Because he’s… he’s got a reputation. Surely you’ve heard all the rumours?”

“And we both know him well enough to know he’s not that person anymore,” you answer, your gaze locking with Eddie’s who, surprisingly, held it.

“You just can’t, please,” he pleaded.

“Give me a good enough reason as to why I shouldn’t go back out there and I won’t.”

Eddie stayed silent for a few moments, his big, brown eyes locked on yours. The small staff room became stuffy all of a sudden, the air so thick it felt like you could barely breathe. You held your ground, waiting for him to speak, but he didn’t. You stared back at Eddie, your eyes pleading with him to just say something. Anything.

You broke your gaze from Eddie’s and turned towards the door, ready to give up and go home. Eddie’s grip on your wrist tightened and he pulled you back towards him, using his free hand to cup your face as his lips met yours.

You weren’t sure how long you’d been there, Eddie kissing you, but it felt like forever. The tension in the air vanished, leaving you with a cozy feeling deep in your stomach, where the butterflies used to live. 

“You can do better than him. You deserve better than him. You deserve someone who knows that you take extra sugar in your coffee when you’re studying. Someone who knows that you’re a completely evil genius in the best way possible when it comes to D&D. Someone who knows you’d rather be in bed with a book at-” he glanced at his watch, “nine o’clock at night. Someone who apparently isn’t very good at making the first move.”

“You’re clueless, you know that?”

“I am?”

“Yeah,” you replied, leaning in to kiss him again.

If it wasn’t for Ruben who knows how long you would have stood there, entwined together, lost in the moment.

“Hey man, you heading home?” Eddie asked casually, placing a little distance between the two of you.

“I was, but turns out I’m staying late. Guy with the hair on table twelve tipped me a hundred bucks to finish your bar shift and fetch a fresh brownie out. Said you ‘owe him one’ and you can ‘square it up later’. Brownie will be out in five. Enjoy.”

[honeyhotteoks]

hi friends!! quick little question and a series of announcements! 📣

first, i have a ton of amazing asks in my inbox right now that require longer/more thought out responses, and to all those people who submitted, i'm def working on replies dw. however............ tumblr keeps giving me an error when i try to reply and it's longer? i keep getting a 'we're sorry your post cannot be processed' thing.... does anyone know what's going on with this / how to get around it? nothing i try has worked.

second, i wanted to provide a little update on some of my multi-chaptered works! i'm heading into a really busy month with work and i have a couple more exams to pass, so i may be a little quiet until the end of the year / slow to respond, but the queue is up and i'll pop in from time to time.

across stardust - chapter two is about halfway done, once i get a little time i'll wrap this and post. hopefully by year end, but if not very early in january. this night together - this one is in progress, but moving a little slowly. there's only 2-3 chapters left, so i think i'm just having a little trouble getting it over the hill. as soon as this is ready to get going though, i'll communicate that. my goal is to finish this by early next year so i can shift back to some other works. into the aurora (book one edits) - i'm about halfway through the editing process on this. the poll was pretty heavily skewed towards posting this as a new work rather than overwriting old chapters, so i'm going to start posting this chapter by chapter next year as new edition. into the aurora (book two) - ideally once the edits of book one are posted, i will be in the middle of writing book two and can start posting that. but truly, across stardust and tnt take prio on finishing since they are both almost done/smaller series. oneshots - i have several cooking, but serious tbd on timing. the ones closest to being done are: -alpha!scoups x omega!reader -sex pollen rafayel x reader lnds fic -epilogue oneshots to tnt -just between friends sequel

[goodyeartheshippycat]

Wahhhh! They're so sweet! I love how you found a pastoral background for them and everything.

Alec and Marcus (and Tibby) Playmobil fanart for @goodyeartheshippycat 's Starfighter fanfiction

[magpiefngrl]

halfway through 2024 book review

June isn't over yet but I'm looking at a couple of very busy weeks so it's unlikely I'll read a gazillion new books or something by end of month. So we do this now!

books I enjoyed so far

Aliette de Bodard's Dominion of the Fallen series, set in a post-apocalyptic Paris with fallen angels and magic and dragons in the Seine. I didn't quite love the three main novels, but I enjoyed how unique the world-building was. However, I REALLY loved the last two novellas about Asmodeus and his husband Thuan, who are a delicious pairing. The novellas are: Of Charms, Ghosts and Grievances and Of Dragons, Feasts and Murders.

Pacat's Dark Heir, which I enjoyed so much that I went back to reread Dark Rise and then again, Dark Heir. I liked the second novel a lot more than the first (and I actually ended up appreciating the first novel more on my reread). Needless to say, I am very, very impatient about the end of the series.

A Nobleman's Guide to Seducing a Scoundrel. KJC has done it again. The sequel to her Doomsday Books series is fantastic, with a vivid cast, an excellent main pairing, and superb pacing. Couldn't put it down. A great historical m/m romance.

The Warrior's Apprentice by Lois McMaster Bujold. I'd heard a lot about Miles and it was fun seeing him bullshit his way across the galaxy.

The Mountains of Mourning by Lois McMaster Bujold. A novella in the Vorkosigan saga. Very touching and emotional and a great character study of Miles. Really loved this.

Newcomer by Keigo Higashino. This dude is seriously amazing at crafting unusual murder mysteries. This one is structured as vignettes of shop-owners in a Tokyo neighbourhood and, as the stories progress, more light is shed on the mystery of a strangled woman.

Faithful Place and The Secret Place by Tana French. Fantastic prose, absorbing murder mysteries that are more like deep character studies as well as an incisive portrait of contemporary Ireland.

The Lady of the Lake by Andrzej Sapkowski. This is pretty grim at times, ngl, but it has a daring structure with lots of POVs, switching between numerous timelines, a frame device, lots of found materials (essays and chapters from fictional books). All that worked for me very well. I love some experimentation with craft. I wouldn't say it was my fave read, but I'm happy that I finally reached the end; completing a series always gives me a dopamine rush so yay

progress on my reading goals

A reminder that my two goals for the year are:

to read (some or all of) the Vorkosigan saga

to read less or no US authors

I'm doing pretty well on those two scores. Read a few installments of the Vorkosigan saga, and (besides Bujold and a poetry anthology by Maggie Smith) have read no other US-based authors. My intention was to diversify my reading and, indeed, so far, I've read French, Japanese, Polish, UK, Australian, Irish, and currently reading a Ukrainian author.

fics I loved

I've not read as many books as I normally do so far, esp in the last couple of months, but I read a lot more fic than recent years. I've read some fab stuff in a variety of fandoms. The fics I'm going to rec below are the longer ones that I read on my ereader:

Tarnished Gold by Prim_the_Amazing (bingqiu/svsss, M, 118k) Inventive premise. Couldn't put it down.

Memory (T, 23k) and Out of the Dead Land (M, 62k), both stucky, both orphaned by one of my top authors ever. The second one gave me the worst fic hangover I had in ages. I had to go and rewatch Captain America.

contrapasso by damagecontrol (jegulus, E, 41k) Very horny. I like that.

Fire Burn and Caldron Bubble by pastapug (jegulus, E, 40k) Lush language, fascinating setting.

Beholden by Faith Wood (faithwood) (drarry, E, 123k) Gave me all the drarry feels.

Shout out to @hoko-onchi-writes's WIP: To Hold You in the Earth's Unholy Din, which I am loving <3

That's all, folks. Here's hoping for more wonderful reads till December!

[light-yaers]

Take Care: Chapter Fourteen TEASER

here's a lil snippet so you guys know i'm writing. this chapter is gonna be a long one. look out!

You and Jamie headed back to the locker room soon after. As he made his way towards the guys, you stuck to the outer limits of the cinder block walls. Roy was still in the manager's office, his back turned as he spoke to Ted and Beard. You didn’t want to intrude, so you made the decision to cut back into the corridor once more; not to leave, but to wait until the guys were ready for a pint.  You slowly trudged down the familiar corridor that you used to traverse every fucking day. Past the locker room, you approached the gym. Beyond that, your old office still sat. Keeley had recently upgraded to a larger room deeper underneath the Dogtrack, however, so the usual array of pink pillows and her cheetah statue were nowhere to be seen.  You entered through the half open door and walked straight into darkness. The walls were the same, just pinker. The desk was the same, just empty. Whenever you visited this office space after time away you felt the same pull to return. You didn’t care if it had no windows; you’d managed to make it home for nearly a year without any hiccups.  God, you wanted to be back here. Everyone knew it, even Rebecca, but you daren’t take favours. You would never.  A small knock sounded from the door, and you turned back quickly. “Ready to g–? Oh!” you exclaimed. You’d been expecting Sam or Roy, but were met with the still slightly unfamiliar face of Nate. “Sorry, Nate. I thought you were someone else.” “That’s alright,” he said, smiling. “May I come in?”  “Oh,” you spluttered. “Yes, of course. This isn’t my office anymore.” He stepped inside. “No, no, it’s not, is it?” he said, and the tone of his voice was erring on patronising. You opted to ignore it, knowing that he wouldn’t have meant it that way. Surely? The silent pause that flittered between you was very awkward, there was no denying it. It wasn’t that you’d meant to not really know him, but your circle at the club had seemed to travel in one certain direction that you hadn’t been able to control. The guys, Ted, Roy, Rebecca. Not Beard, not Nate. You didn’t mean anything by it innately.  If anything, you were happy that Nate was making himself known to you. You’d love to get to know him more– or more than what you barely knew of him from your time at the club.  “What a great game today, wasn’t it?” you started.  “Oh yes, fantastic game,” said Nate.  “And that thing–” You mimed what had happened on the pitch earlier, which happened to be a middle finger of all things. “That all four of you did to Jamie. Classic, really fucking brilliant.” “Oh yes, the good old middle finger.” Nate copied you in miming what he’d done less than an hour ago. All four coaches had signalled to Tartt what needed to be done, and that signal happened to be swearing at him full-frontally. Four middle fingers had stood up on end, and Tottenham didn’t know what had hit them when Tartt managed to make a goal from just beyond the halfway line.  “You were all absolutely brilliant!” you exclaimed. “I’ve been seeing you in the paper as well, you know? The whole Wonderkid thing.” Nate smiled forcefully. “I definitely said Wunderkind.” “Either way, it’s fantastic you’re getting that recognition.” “Thank you, thank you,” Nate said, taking your compliment graciously; or so you thought. “So, here’s the thing.” He plunged right into his words like he’d had them on standby the entire time.  “Go on,” you urged him happily. “You can’t come to Wembley.”  “What?” you asked, not fully absorbing his words.  Nate stopped smiling. He looked at you sternly, or like you were akin to dirt on his shoe, or whatever else. Your smile turned to a frown instantly.  “You can’t come to Wembley,” Nate repeated. 

TAKE CARE: CHAPTER FOURTEEN COMING VERY SOOOOOON

[el1997jk]

Hi, El! Hope you're doing good 🦋✨️

Just passing by, uh—

I was asking myself the same question, and I found it an interesting thought exercise, so: in the next five years, which ten goals would you say you've got for your fanfic writing hobbie?

It doesn't need to be ten goals you'll actually run towards in the next five years, if you ain't got smth like that in mind, but if you Had To choose ten goals, which would they be?

Hi, well, firstly, thank you so much for asking. I'm doing well. 🦋😊⭐️ How about you? How are you doing? I hope you're doing well 💗

No worries, you can pass by and ask me questions any time. 😊

You are right it is a question that is very interesting, though exercise.

My answer to your question is:

Honestly, I think that for me, coming up with those ten goals for my hobby of fanfic writing was harder than the part about it happening in the next five years 😅

My ten goals (in no particular order except for the first one)

1. Finish my two ongoing fanfics. (Hopefully, I can achieve this by the end of this year)

2. Write at least half of the ideas that I have for fanfics into full stories. (I currently have 20+ ideas, and I know that number will get bigger as time goes by)

3. Finish writing a fanfic either fully or at least halfway before I post the first chapter.

4. Get better at writing scenes that are out of my comfort zone (18+ scenes, sad scenes, fighting scenes, etc.)

5. Write for at least thirty minutes to an hour every day (or longer depending on how much time I will have throughout the day)

6. Have people submit ideas that they would like me to write for them. (I would like to try it)

7. Write down any ideas that I might have for either ongoing fanfics or future ones so I don't forget them. (Either on a piece of paper, into my phone, or voice record it)

8. Have at least somewhat of an idea for a plot that will happen in the fanfic before I start working on it so I don't get stuck. (Or start rewriting the fic from the start when I'm already halfway through)

9. Keep track of what plot points I want to have in my fanfics and write them down into a list, so the story doesn't end up all messy.

10. Have a posting schedule from Monday to Sunday for my fanfics, so whoever reads them knows on what day the next chapter will be posted. But it also helps me to stay organised and not get overwhelmed while posting. (There won't be a fanfic for every day of the week all the time, obviously. It will depend on how many fanfics I'm posting at the time)

I don't know if those goals actually fit what you have asked me, but it was really interesting to think about and come up with them nonetheless.

Thank you for such a thought-provoking question. I don’t think that I would have thought about these goals otherwise.

🦋El🦋

[sergeantjessi]

The more I do the actual research, the more I wish I would've just lived in blissful ignorance

Me: Hmmm, I'll just start writing this scene without having done the research yet, I'm sure the few bits I remember will be enough to get the basic things done with only minimal editing needed once I actually start researching

The Narrator behind my back: :)

[ahoyimlosingmymind]

does keefe come across as disingenuous to you? manipulative?

Not always. But there's definitely moments. This ask has been stewing in my inbox for a long while as I tried to piece together how I wanted to respond lol. now I know the Keefe girlies are instantly going to be triggered by the words 'manipulative' and 'disingenuous.' And here is where I remind you that literally every human being can be, and are often purposefully and accidentally both of those things. Doesn't mean they're evil, irredeemable pieces of crap, they're just words to describe the sometimes harmful actions of someone. Intentional or not. It's vocab baby! Think of them as neutral terms.

Also I feel like I lost the plot halfway through writing this, bc I AM EXHAUSTED but lol

I’m going to go in on the part about him being disingenuous more than manipulative, because I think the former has more merit. Specifically in regards to what he says about Sophie and his crush, vs what he does. I’m going to source from Nightfall onward, because I believe this is when his walk stopped matching his talk. (I had to bust out the Keefe wiki page for this lol)

Specifically, we’re following this quote and onward:  “From that point on, he only had one goal: To be whatever Sophie needed. Not the hero. Not the one taking charge of everything. Just a guy ready to listen and help and be there for her. A friend. Until she was ready for more.” - Nightfall, Keefe’s POV, short story. (takes place after Keefe’s ‘fight’ with Dimitar, through chapters 36-60) All right, this is a good sentiment. It had the sokeefe fangirls swooning, and for good reason. I don’t like Keefe, nor do I ship sokeefe, but this is quite plainly a ‘green flag’. Many people defend and cite this quote when they’re expressing that Keefe sees her as more than just a silly crush!! He’s letting her make the decision of who to like!!! But I do want to note Keefe’s comment of ‘Until she was ready for more.’ We know Keefe likes her, it’s normal for people to hold out hope for crushes and have fantasies of getting your way– but my issue is that there’s some level of weird assumption to the statement, like he’s going to end up being more than friends with Sophie no matter what. Which kinda throws the whole ‘I’m gonna be her bestie!’ thing out of the window a bit, because this still implies that his following actions have an undertone of still trying to sway her to be in love with him, and he’s not exactly what I’d call ‘friendly’ about it. Again, this comes off as disingenuous. Clearly he is not that okay with just being her friend, if his end goal is still ‘Until she’s ready for more.’ But I’m not gonna harp too hard on him for the rest of Nightfall, or the beginning of Flashback, because of course he’s still trying to win her affection and he’s still hoping she’ll choose him, he’s a kid with a crush. (And Nightfall and the beginning of Flashback don’t have established Fitzphie yet. But it’s going to get rough in Legacy, so be forewarned.) But I do think it is fair to note that through Nightfall and Flashback, all of his interactions with Sophie still have a romantic undertone through his actions and words, and it does not seem like he’s really trying to be ‘just her friend’. I’m not saying he was forcing anything upon her, or that Sophie was rejecting him (bc I don’t ship them and honestly never really saw her liking him, but I realize I am a bit of an outlier in this way so that’s not the point of this post.) – but his actions just don’t match the initial sentiment of the first quote, or at least the ‘friend’ part people defend. More so, it just seems like he’s waiting for that ‘until she’s ready for more’ moment to come. 

Keefe’s nightfall short story covers from pages 354-556, so I’m focusing on his interactions with Sophie from then on, going forward. The first interaction that has less than ‘She’s just my friend!!!” undertones is on pages 668-669. Up until this point in Nightfall, he is doing a pretty good job at not being overly romantic and flirty with Sophie. (aside from unnecessary touching and stuff, but Shannon has a weird habit of making all of her guy characters touch Sophie too much, so I’ll keep that criticism reserved for now. It’ll come up later.) But this next scene is where I feel that he creeps back into romantic pursuit territory. 

‘Sophie feels bad when she realizes that Keefe can get lost in others’ emotions, and hers are even worse. Keefe assures her that it's “worth it” and walks closer to her. She crashes into the wall, and he stands in front of her, blocking her from moving, knowing that Sophie's being ridiculous when she says that he should stay away from her, but Keefe claims that he likes to take on a challenge. When he leans in Sophie's stomach flutters as his breath tickles her skin. Keefe starts to say, "Speechless again? You know, there's—," but it is interrupted.’ - Sourced from the KOTLC wiki, so if you think this was written with a biased undertone, I didn’t write it lol. Okay, my first comment on it… who… does this to a friend? or someone they’re trying to ‘just be a friend’ to? Again, I’m not saying he’s in the wrong for continuing to flirt with her and stuff, (This scene always read to me as Sophie being mildly uncomfortable too, but that isn’t the point of this post so don’t @ me about it lol)  it’s just that it does not align with his ‘new goal’. She’s not taken, of course, and he still is hoping that she’ll start liking him etc… nothing wrong with this, except that it’s contradictory to the previous statement made in his short story. This is not ‘I’m waiting until she’s ready’ behavior, this is ‘if Grady didn’t walk in we probably would have kissed!’ behavior. Where’s the friendship sentiment now?? 

^this is the first thing that I find disingenuous, and the last thing from Nightfall.

Onto Flashback! Now I have compiled what I believe to be weirdly romantic things to do and say to someone you’re ‘just being a friend to’. All of these are from the kotlc wiki bc I am not in the mood to bust out all my books xd. 

‘Keefe tells her she looks perfect, making her blush’ - Flashback, pg 5 

Keefe tells her "Aw, the little shrieking sounds you're making are adorable." when Sophie plunges her hand into a bucket of ice water to learn body temperature regulation. (Pg. 248) 

Then there’s a bunch of instances of touching, hand holding, waist grabbing, gazing, blushing, soft smiling, flirting etc (which I am NOW going to point out, because while Fitz does the same things, he never vowed he was trying to be ‘just her friend’, so at least his intentions are straight forward.) 

My comment on all of this: people who are just friends (who are both straight and opposite genders) typically don’t tell each other they look perfect, they don’t call each other adorable, they are not constantly grabbing hands, brushing hair out of eyes, smoothing out worry lines in between eyebrows etc…  Keefe’s obviously done this the whole series, but the reason I’m not bringing all of that past stuff up is because all the books prior to the end of Nightfall, he didn’t vow to just be her friend. Of course, a lot of this chills out because then Fitzphie happens at the midpoint in Flashback. 

But boy is it back with vengeance in Legacy. 

‘Keefe says that Sophie has a cute crease in between her eyebrows and then points out that her feelings seem fluttery around him.’ (Pg. 70) 

Now here is where the REAL issues begin. Not only is he supposedly trying to be just her friend, he’s also trying to back off romantically (or he should be!) because Sophie is no longer single as of right now, and she’s dating his best friend. So calling someone you like cute in this scenario is first of all, insane, but also again, contradictory to what he’s supposedly ‘trying so hard!!!’ to not do. And yes, Sophie would obviously notice if he just stopped complimenting her 24/7, because he’s done it for so many books- but we all know that his comments and compliments are because he likes her!!! He is clearly not trying that hard to curb it atp. It comes from a romantic place, not a place of friendship. He doesn’t call Biana and Linh cute 24/7, which tells me for a fact that there is nothing ‘friendly’ about it when it comes to Sophie. 

Keefe comforts Sophie by saying that being unmatchable ‘won’t change anything, at least to people who matter.’ (Pg. 101 - 102)

I don’t have issues with his sentiment. Because he’s right, the right person wouldn’t care. I have issues with how he coaxed the secret of Sophie being unmatchable out of her using his empathy, and while yes, she needed someone to talk to… it probably shouldn’t have been the guy who’s overly obsessed with her love life because he likes her. Of course, Sophie doesn’t know this (eye roll) but KEEFE DOES. He knows. He knows this is probably the most unhealthy and worst place to insert himself considering the fact that he is just too close to the situation. But he does it anyway– bc at the end of the day, even though he claims he’s just trying to be a good friend, the ‘until she’s ready for more’ part is never going to really leave the back of his mind. I’m not saying he was trying to break Sophie and Fitz up (but we all know he wanted them to lol), but oh my Lord– he’s too emotionally invested. AND HE KNOWS THIS. So once again, it’s giving, ‘you said one thing, but you’re doing another’.  but I also don't fault him for trying to reassure Sophie, that was good friend behavior-- but he technically wasn't even supposed to know about the situation in the first place. He's obviously more invested in what Sophie chooses to do with her love life than say-- Biana or someone else.

Biana could say the same thing Keefe said, and I'd be like 'mhm, good friend!!!' but it's the fact that Keefe has feelings for Sophie that make me wince a bit. I'm not saying he's being a piece of crap or anything at all!!! Don't read it that way please-- I am just saying that his reasons for getting involved do have more... personal value to him.

‘When Ro is trying to convince them Bronte isn’t Sophie’s dad, Ro calls Sophie a “blond hottie,” and Keefe agrees.’ (Pg. 233 - 234)

Yep, because that’s totally platonic and an okay thing to agree to when a girl literally isn’t single and is dating your best friend, and you like her. 

‘Keefe calls Sophie, “awfully cute in a crown,” and even though Sophie knows he’s teasing her, she blushes from head to toe.’ (Pg. 238)

Again, the issue is that he knows he likes her, but that she’s taken. THESE COMMENTS NEED TO STOP. AND YET THEY PERSIST. 

There’s also so much physical contact. Oh my gosh. Like dude!!! Yeah you can hug friends platonically and hold their hands platonically… but not if YOU HAVE REAL GENUINE ROMANTIC FEELINGS THAT YOU”ARE SUPPOSEDLY TRYING TO RESIST !!! 

I can appreciate that Keefe was in an awkward position, and you can’t just shut off feelings, and that there were many times when he told Sophie ‘hey, maybe talk to Fitz about this!’ I don’t think he’s a wretched person (though I don’t like him.) but there’s quite a few things he says but doesn’t follow through with actions, especially in this scenario, and he bends too easily to his own obsession and feelings with and for Sophie. And you can argue that he secretly knew she really liked him the whole time- but that is not an excuse to not even try that hard to keep a distance from the situation. She was literally taken- by his best friend no less. And I know there were many times Sophie went to Keefe first to emotionally confide in, but I do believe there was a lot he should have shut down, considering the fact that he’s the one who is aware of everyone’s feelings in the scenario, meanwhile Sophie is oblivious to Keefe’s underlying intentions and motivations. She feels safe confiding in him emotionally of course, because as far as she is concerned, it is purely platonic, as it has been since the beginning (from her POV). But he knows it's not. Could one argue that he, in some ways, takes advantage of the fact that she's oblivious to his feelings for her? After all, confiding in a guy you know likes you, while you're dating someone else is kind of a big red flag-- which means that unfortunately, Sophie can't make an informed decision of where to truly draw boundaries with Keefe, because she's unaware of his romantic pursuit. (I'm not saying he's taking advantage on purpose, and I genuinely think a lot of it is so subconscious that it's hard to really say it's intentional.)

I just don't think Sophie would have turned to him in the same way if she knew he liked her, while dating Fitz.

They are teenagers. They're all dumb. I don't expect them to be perfect, and I get why Keefe hadn't confessed at this point-- but I feel like it's fair to say that objectively, it's a very messy situation due to his lack of honesty with Sophie. And the fact that Sophie didn't know Keefe really liked her in that way meant that, in her POV, Fitz's obvious paranoia and distrust feels like it comes from an unwarranted place-- meanwhile, both Keefe and Fitz know what is really going on under the surface. She's so left in the dark, and it's quite horrible to read.

And I feel that this is WHY the narrative lets a lot slide with Keefe, because Sophie doesn't know his full side of it. She has the 'oh it's all platonic!" reading of the situation, which makes Keefe come off as very innocent in her eyes. Sure there's moments when she suspects he might like her as more than a-- but they don't last long, and she convinces herself otherwise.

Do I believe Keefe cares about Sophie? Yes. Of course. Has he 100% been a good friend on multiple occasions? Yes. No doubt about it. Do I believe he would remain her friend even if he never ‘got her’ in the end? Also yes. But it’s just that little ‘until she was ready for more’ that drives me berserk. Because I feel that that is his true intention, that he’s really only trying to be her friend in hopes of finally winning her affection. Which– many crushes are like that. But yeah, that’s why I find it to be quite disingenuous. Especially because once she’s with Fitz, it still seems like he’s waiting for his wish of her being ready and to realize her undying feelings for him to come to fruition. So how genuine is his ‘friendship’ really, when a lot of it is motivated by romantic aspirations? 

Maybe I’m a prude. Maybe I don’t understand Keefe at all. Maybe none of this was ever his intention and it was all subconscious– but I truly believe he crossed some emotional boundaries that typically one does not cross when someone else is in a relationship. He tried to curb it sometimes, but at the end of the day, it just seems like he didn’t try THAT hard.

I believe that there are also more instances where Keefe is not honest about his motivations, or how he truly feels about something through the books, but this was getting so long, so let me know if ya'll want a part two lmaoooo

tags: @what-is-there-to-fear

[hornets-nest666]

Leila: Hello, our beloved bees!♡

Thank you for following the comic for so long, it's nice to know that you're all sticking around -^-

Next year, I want to wish you all the best and that all your wishes come true!

And now some interesting facts:

1) The FIRST CHAPTER of our comic will end soon, wow

2) In the second chapter you will meet new faces ;)

3) We love you :b

Overlee: (sorry, I'm really drunk writing this) I can't believe we've been drawing this comic for two years. This is the first time I've been doing something for so long. It's sad that we can't finish this chapter for the second year, but on the other hand, we're already very close to the goal!

I am very happy that there are people who are still interested in our continuation. You all are really sweet, and I want to give you guys a huge thank you, my beloved suns ❤ This year hasn't been the greatest, but it has been a year of growth and learning. Thank you very much for your interest in our comic, because it is what motivates us to continue our work.

Sorry that I didn't draw anything for the New Year. Currently, I have some kind of art block and have no desire to draw anything, please excuse me.🥲 I hope that next year I will be more responsible, and you and I will already be halfway through the comic. I wish everyone happiness. I hope everyone who reads this is either already happy or will be happy next year. In short,

❤️💃🥂HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!🥂💃❤️

And a little about how we celebrate:

[hatchetfield-omegaverse]

Hail Petey, Full of Grace (1/5)

By: Myself & @daisyybellls

AO3 Link

Summary:

“How would us going to abstinence camp help you?” Pete can't help but ask.

“Because if you're both at camp I can change the narrative. You won't be delinquent teens. You'll be two young adults who made a mistake and want to atone for it. And going to abstinence camp is proof. I'll even be generous: when you come back I will have a house for you to raise the baby in. That way everyone can see that you want to give the… baby a good life.”

“And if we don't?” Steph's voice is full of venom as she speaks.

“If you don't I will do everything in my power to keep you two apart. No one, and I mean no one, will know the baby is yours Stephanie.”

When a dumb teenage decision not only forever changes the lives of Peter Spankoffski and Stephanie Lauter, but lands them at Camp Idontwannabang, their only goal is to survive the summer. But a joke gone wrong earns them the attention of Grace, the Jerries, and the entire camp and launches the pair into the scandal of their lives. It's gonna be a bumpy summer.

Takes place in the same universe as Tear Down My Reason by Calmly Chaotic and What An Ass, What A Bitch, What A Cuck by Calmly Chaotic and mars_of_the_stars.

A/N: Remember how the last time I wrote something I said my life was imploding? Yeah it God bad enough I had to take a hiatus from writing. But, now I'm back! And, while away I made a silly joke while in VC that would eventually lead to this au!

This first chapter is written by me, and the next will be written by my lovely co-author @daisyybellls!

Chapter 1: Welcome To Camp!

-

Grace Chasity loved exactly three things in life: her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, her family, and being Hatchetfield High's most dedicated hall monitor. And the power that came with it. Of course, she tried not to let it get to her head (no power was as strong as that of The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit), but it still filled her with glee that she had the ability to distribute justice unto the delinquents she attended school with and set them on the right path. The path of God that is.

Bathroom checks were one of her favorite ways to distribute said justice: checking the stalls, making sure that any hooligans without passes were dealt with, keeping the halls of Hatchetfield High safe, it was all so thrilling. There would be no skipping class to try the devil's lettuce or canoodle with Grace in charge. Not now, not ever.

She finds herself humming ‘This Little Light of Mine’ as she completes her post-lunch checks. In her time as a hall monitor, Grace has found that people tend to skip the most right after lunch, so this check is one of the most important.

“Bathroom check!” She calls as she walks into the next bathroom on her list. “Passes out or its detention!”

The bathroom is empty at first glance and Grace is halfway through marking it off as clear when she hears it. Retching, from the very last stall. She wrinkles nose at first before taking a deep breath and marching to the source of the sound.

“Bathroom check. I need to see your pass.” Grace announces as she knocks once. Then twice. But only silence meets her request. And then more retching. She sighs. “Look, I'm willing to ignore you not having a pass since you're clearly sick, if you promise to go straight to the nurses office. Okay?”

Finally Grace gets a quiet, “Ok.”, in response and it's a satisfactory enough answer for her. She's halfway through washing her hands when the stall behind her opens and out walks Stephanie Lauter, clothes rumpled and lipstick smeared.

“Oh gosh Steph,” Grace croons as the other girl washes her hand, “do you have a tummy ache?”

“Something like that.” Steph nods, her lips pressed in a tight line. “Look, I'll go straight to the nurse's office, just don't tell anyone you saw me here.”

“Do you think it was something you ate?” Grace asks, completely ignoring the part where Steph asked her to lie. “Maybe the meatloaf? Oh goodness, I ate the meatloaf.”

“It's not the meatloaf. I just had a wild night last night.”

“Oh. Well it must have been a wild night to have you so sick this morning.” Grace smiles in sympathy as she gathers her belongings. And then it hits her. “Morning. Sicknesses. Morning sickness. Oh, Steph, you don't think you're pregnant do you?”

“Yeah Grace. I'm totally pregnant.” Steph responds, tapping on a weird patch on her backpack. It's an odd circle with blue, pink, and white stripes that Grace doesn't recognize. Oh gosh, maybe it's a reward for whatever heinous activities Stephanie had to do to become pregnant. The poor thing. “Don't you have to turn in your detention slips?”

Grace gasps and runs to the door. “Oh goodness, you're right. I need to skedaddle. I'm always here if you need somewhere to turn, okay Steph?” She calls as she leaves.

Her footsteps have just faded away when another voice asks, “Is she gone?”

“Yeah, Pete, she's gone.”

Steph hands her boyfriend a water bottle as he comes out from his hiding place in the stall. He swishes, washing the acidic taste out of his mouth. “I thought she'd never leave.” He says when he's done.

“Me neither.” Steph sighs. “Luckily, she apparently goes easy on ‘hooligans’ who are vomiting.”

“Yeah. Lucky.” Pete whispers. “She said morning sickness. You don't think she'll realize.”

“She won't.” Steph promises. “I showed her my trans patch. And she didn't even see you. We can figure out what to do privately. Ok?”

Pete looks down at the plastic stick in his hands, its dual pink lines staring back at him. “Ok.”

-

Ding!

A soft chime rings throughout Beanie's signaling a new customer, not that anyone could really hear it. The pitter patter of rain and hail hitting the building drowned its chimes. Even if he had been able to hear it, Pete wouldn't care too much about someone taking shelter from the storm. He had bigger things to worry about; like teaching Steph the quadratic formula, or worrying how he was going to tell his brother that he was pregnant.

It isn't until he hears a firm, “Ahem.”, from in front of him that Pete even bothers looking away from their math homework. An older woman stands in front of them clad in a burgundy dress suit, her auburn hair slicked into a neat French twist. Pete vaguely recognizes her: Ms.Tessburger, the mayor's personal assistant and, according to Steph at least, professional brown noser. He'd only met her a few times, normally when she was checking over Steph's grades to see that the tutoring was working (it was), and each meeting was just as awkward as the first.

“Your father wants to see you.” She says, lips pursed into a thin line. From the corner of his eye, Pete sees Steph roll her eyes before packing up her things. So much for the rest of their date. He's just about to kiss Steph goodbye when she shoots him a pointed look. “Both of you.”

He can't help but gulp at her words. He'd met Solomon Lauter exactly once, back when he was just Steph's tutor. He could still remember how awkward their first and only conversation had been.

“So you're the boy Stephanie roped into tutoring her.” Pete had been brought into his private office after a tutoring session, the first one they'd had at the Lauter residence. “It's good to finally meet you.”

“Y-yes sir.” He'd prayed his voice wouldn't crack as he spoke, forcing himself to look Solomon in the eyes. He watched as the older man poured himself a scotch. “I'm Peter Spank-”

“-offski. I know.” Solomon finished. He took a sip of his drink, never breaking eye contact. “Unlike my daughter, I do my homework.” Solomon laughed at his joke.

“R-right. Sorry.”

“You know,” Solomon drawled, making his way from around the mahogany desk. “The Spankoffskis have quite the reputation around town. Especially your brother, Ted isn't it? Why everyone I asked had a story about him. He's quite the philanderer, isn't he?” It wasn't a question.

“Normally, I would be worried about letting someone with such a… reputation around my daughter: she rebels enough without any encouragement. But, luckily enough, you have quite the reputation of your own: valedictorian, clean record, not even a speeding ticket. You keep your nose clean.”

Pete nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“Good. Then you'll understand when I say this. I expect excellence from everyone in my life, and that includes you. This is not an opportunity for you two to have sex. You will help Stephanie get her grades up. And if the results do not meet my expectations, or if I catch a whiff of funny business, you will never see each other again. Understood?”

Pete nodded, never breaking eye contact. “Understood. She'll get her grades up, sir.”

Pete hadn't seen the mayor since then, and his opinion of the man only worsened. He could safely say that Solomon Lauter was an asshole who only cared about his daughter when she could affect his reputation. Pete doubted that the mayor knew anything about his daughter. Once, during a rare moment of vulnerability on Steph's part, she'd confessed to Pete that part of her thought Solomon had only adopted her because it would be good for his campaign. He couldn't count how many times he'd seen Steph close to tears after speaking to her father. And every time, Pete felt that flame of hatred burn a little brighter.

He tries to keep his thoughts on the inside as he gathers his things. God knows why he wanted to see him, but whatever it is can’t be good. And it'll only be worse when he knows the truth, a small voice in the back of his head whispers. They're led outside where a black limo is waiting. Steph gets in first, holding a hand out to help Pete in. He sits down, only to meet the stoney gaze of Mayor Lauter. Fuck. Well there goes planning in the car. He takes a deep breath and nods at the older man. He gets nothing in return.

It isn't until the car is driving that Solomon speaks. “Is there anything either of you want to tell me?” He asks, pretending this is a casual conversation. “Anything at all?”

“I got a B+ on my chemistry test.” Steph replies. “And we haven't gotten our grades for our history project back, but I think I did good on it.”

Pete can't stop himself from smiling at the pride in Stephanie's voice as she speaks. She'd improved so much over the year and deserved to celebrate it, not that her father would ever recognize it. And then Solomon frowns and reality washes over him like a bucket of ice water. He knows, that voice from earlier hisses. He tries to ignore it, tries to tell himself that it's just anxiety, and it almost works. Until Solomon opens his mouth, that is.

“Really? Nothing else? Maybe why the entire town thinks you're pregnant?”

Pete winces and goes to defend himself. Then he notices Solomon's gaze. It's fixed firmly on Stephanie, dark eyes burning holes into her skull. They thought Stephanie Lauter was pregnant? Not him? How the hell could anyone come to that conclusion? Everyone knew that she was trans: Solomon had shouted it from the rooftops from the second she’d come out, all too happy to parade her around as proof of how progressive his policies were. Oh yes, Mayor Lauter was more than happy to mention his trans adopted daughter, how anyone could believe that Steph was pregnant was beyond Pete's comprehension.

“What?” He asks. Distantly he hears Steph's voice mirroring his.

“I was at lunch with some of my campaigning backers today.” Solomon says in lieu of an answer, “And what was supposed to be a lunch planning our next fundraiser was derailed when Linda Monroe expressed concerns that my vote might be affected by the rumor that my teenage daughter is pregnant.”

“That's ridiculous.” Steph retorts, voice dripping with incredulity. “Everybody knows that I'm trans. I literally can't get pregnant.”

“No, but he can.”

Pete shrinks into his seat as Solomon turns his steely gaze to him. “I was just about to brush any rumors aside- it would only take a reminder that you're trans to end it- and then I checked my credit card statement. And what do I see but a charge to a CVS in Clivesdale for 3 pregnancy tests. So I'm asking you again, and I want total honesty: is there anything you want to tell me?”

Pete sighs, shoulders sagging. Looks like the jig is up. “I'm pregnant. And it's Steph's.”

Solomon pinches the bridge of his nose, brows firmly knit together. “The only reason I let you two see each other is because I trusted that you wouldn't do anything, and now you mean to tell me, when the election is only months away, that you're pregnant?!”

“Yes, ok, we fucked up, I admit it.” Steph says before Pete has even formulated a response. He's sure she's used to this; having to defend her every action, good or bad. He doesn't want to think about how many times she's done it before, or whether or not their baby will be held to the same impossible standards by Solomon. “But we're taking responsibility for it. We're keeping the baby. And I’m going to be involved in their life. You can't stop me.”

“Stephanie, I am trying to have an intelligent conversation: in other words shut up.” Pete has to bite his tongue to stop himself from snapping back that Steph is very intelligent. “I cannot understate how stupid it is for you to have a baby when you're 17, not to mention how it'll look for the mayor's daughter to be a teen mother. But, since you're so determined to act like an adult, you get to make adult decisions. I'm going to give you two options: First, you both go to Camp Idontwannabang-”

“Abstinence Camp?!” Steph all but shouts.

Solomon merely waits for her to stop. “Like I said, you'll both go to Camp Idontwannabang for the summer. While you're away I can work some PR magic to… deal with this scandal.”

“How would us going to abstinence camp help you?” Pete can't help but ask.

“Because if you're both at camp I can change the narrative. You won't be delinquent teens. You'll be two young adults who made a mistake and want to atone for it. And going to abstinence camp is proof. I'll even be generous: when you come back I will have a house for you to raise the baby in. That way everyone can see that you want to give the… baby a good life.”

“And if we don't?” Steph's voice is full of venom as she speaks.

“If you don't I will do everything in my power to keep you two apart. No one, and I mean no one, will know the baby is yours Stephanie.”

“You can't stop me. Even if you try, I'll just tell everyone once I turn 18. You won't keep me from our baby.”

“That may be so, but I can keep you apart until after the election, and after that I won't care. Besides, you'd miss the birth of your child, and we both know you don't want that, do you Stephanie?”

Pete knows his answer before he even speaks. The thought of Steph not getting to be there for the birth physically pains him. She deserved to be there every second of the pregnancy. He sighs.

“You have a deal.”

-

This is for Steph. I'm doing this for Steph. The mantra runs through Peter's head like a hamster on a wheel as he sits in the passenger seat of Ted's Studebaker. The trees that made up the Witchwood roll pass in straight rows, Pete vaguely remembers some fun fact about lumberjacks replanting trees in a grid pattern but he doesn't bother trying to remember why. He's got more important things to worry about right now.

“Well,” Ted sighs, clearly looking for something, anything, to break the awkward silence that filled the car. “we all have to do our time at abstinence camp. Looks like it's your turn.”

“Yeah.” Pete mumbles. “What’s it like?”

“It's eight weeks of pure fucking torture. All those girls in their shorts, and you can't have any fun. Not that you need help having fun, eyyy Petey?” He jokes. Or, well, tries to joke. It falls flat at the end. Even still, Pete can't help but snort.

“Yeah. I'm a real stud, can't keep the ladies off me.” He says, voice dripping with sarcasm. There's more silence before a thought pops in his brain. “Why didn't you just masturbate?”

“It's abstinence camp, Doofus, masturbation isn't allowed.”

“And what? They can stop you at night in cabins?” God, what kind of control freaks would want to run a camp like this?

“They have ways, Pete, so be careful. I know they say that pregnancy makes you randy, but its not worth it.”

“Seriously, how insane do you have to be to care that much about whether or not a teenager whacks off?” Pete can’t help but incredulously.

“Fucking insane.” Ted nodded in agreement. “You know, you don't have to go if you don't want to.”

“I-I..” Pete couldn't remember why he was even going here. It honestly sounded like hell. A reminder comes in the form of a firm kick to Pete's side. He could handle a couple months at camp for Steph and their family. He presses his hands against the swell of his belly, relishing in the soft kicks he felt in response, and nodded. “I do. For Steph. We're in this together.”

Ted only sighs in response and, soon enough, they're passing through a wooden sign with ‘Camp Idontwannabang’ engraved on it.

“Do you want me to carry your bag for you?” Ted asks as he parks. Pete shakes his head as he opens the car door. No use delaying the inevitable.

“I've got it.”

“Are you sure?” Ted pressed. “The doctor said no lifting heavy objects.”

“I'm sure Ted. I'm just carrying it to my bunk anyway.” Pete gets out of the car and grabs a plain black duffle bag from the back seat before hoisting the strap over his shoulder. It presses against his chest and he knows that his shirt is probably already stained with milk. It was just his luck that he'd start lactating the week before camp was due to start. The fact his chest seems all too eager to produce and leak as much milk as possible was just the cherry on top.

Ted pulls him into a tight hug, having gotten out of the car while Pete was lost in thoughts of stained shirts and pumping. “Call me if you need anything, okay? I'll be here in a heartbeat.”

“I know Ted. I'll be fine. I promise.”

Ted squeezes him one last time before pulling away. “I know.” Their goodbyes last for only a few more moments before Ted turns and, with much reluctance, gets back in the car. Their eyes meet in the rearview mirror and Pete is definitely sure there's tears in his eyes as he drives away. He watches the Studebaker drive until it fades completely from view. He sighs and turns back around, staring at the wooden sign with contempt.

Well Peter, he thinks, welcome to slut shaming Hell.

-

It took Steph all of 10 minutes to decide that she hated Camp Idontwannabang, and another 5 to start plotting ways to escape. Check in had been hell; the stupid counselor had spent way too long going through her luggage for contraband, stopping only when he came to her ‘unmentionables’. The bastard then took her phone, citing that there was “a phone available in the main office in case of emergencies”. Prick. After that, Steph had been given a set of 7 pink cotton shirts, ‘Virginity Rocks’ scrawled across the chest in white lettering. Then she was handed a map of the camp with instructions to head to the circled cabin and change immediately.

So of course, she immediately ignored all given instructions; instead wandering near the entrance in hopes of finding Pete so they could settle in together. The last thing she wanted was for him to have to carry his bags himself, he didn't need the extra strain. Her plans, however, were thwarted by the counselors' seemingly innate need to keep all interactions from campers of the opposite sex to basic greetings only. Every time she went near the boy’s check in table, an amplified voice shouting, “That's close enough now!”, would ring out across that camp, letting everybody know that Stephanie Lauter had dared to even go near a boy. They might as well stamp 'WHORE’ on her forehead.

So here she was, hiding behind a tree to hide from the counselors, searching a sea of blue shirts for any sight of her boyfriend.

Steph curses her father for what had to be the millionth time that day: they would both be at home prepping for their baby if it weren't for his stupid campaign. But no, Solomon Lauter had to be paranoid about voters, and now Steph was doomed to spend the next 3 months around a bunch of uptight, bible-thumping prudes. Things couldn't get any worse.

“STEPH!”

Never-fucking-mind.

Steph groans and turns to see Grace Chasity running towards her. And, before she can react, she's pulled into a bone crushing hug by the other girl. “Hi Grace.” She sighs, unable to keep the annoyance out of her voice.

“I'm so glad you're here, Steph!” Grace says in a chipper tone, having completely missed the sarcasm in Steph. She grips her hand and begins leading her further inside camp. “Are you lost? I can show you where your cabin is, you're either in Magdala or Moab since you're 17. I'm a junior counselor this year so I'm in the Bethany Cabin, but we'll still see each other a bunch.”

“Magdala.” Steph answers. She glances back towards the welcome tables. Pete should be here soon. “Look, it's nice of you to offer but I'm waiting on so-”

“I'm really glad you're at camp this year.” Grace interrupts as she continues to drag her towards a pink cabin. “I know it turned out to be a false alarm, but I can't help but imagine you having to go through that all alone. And now you can learn the error of your ways, so nothing scary like that will happen to you again! I'm so glad I told everyone.”

“Wait,” Steph stops. Memories of the bathroom flash through her mind. Grace's worry. A positive pregnancy test. Pete's fear that she would tell everyone. White, hot anger floods her veins as she speaks, nostrils flared. “You started the rumor I'm pregnant? That's why I'm here.”

“I know.” Grace smiles, oblivious to how close Steph was to throttling her. Steph clenches her fists, nails biting into the meat of her palm. “I thought you'd be too scared to ask for help, so I just told everyone you know: your friends, your teachers, I even asked the elders of my church for advice. Someone eventually told me that you can't have kids because you were born with daddy parts, but I'm still so glad you're here.”

Steph is almost glad when she's pulled into another hug, because it means Grace can't see the murderous look that surely on her face. “Okay, that's enough contact.” a counselor shouts at them.

“Gee, thanks Grace.” Steph says through gritted teeth when they separate. She can practically feel the sarcasm dripping from her lips. “You really shouldn't have.”

“I know. But that's what friends are for. You know, it's kinda funny: you might not be… expecting, but apparently there's going to be someone attending camp this year who's”, she pauses, her voice dropping into a dramatic whisper, “pregnant.”

“What?” Steph blinks. Everyone knew about Pete already? Fuck. God, she needed to find him. She needed to be there before anyone could judge him. Could act like any of this was his fault. “How do you know?”

“Apparently one of the counselors heard the Jerries talking about it. I guess they've had to make a bunch of accommodations cause she's really far along. We get to help her rehabilitate from her… promiscuous past. That way she can raise her baby in the light of God.”

Steph had to bite her tongue in order to stop herself from correcting Grace's use of ‘she’; it wasn't worth it. Instead she went to ask who the ‘Jerries’ were, only for Grace to grab her arm, declaring that they needed to unpack so they could get to the welcome festivities. She didn't notice the figures rushing towards the entrance, or how everyone was now staring at the pregnant teen who now stood at the welcome table.

-

“First and last name?” A counselor asks Pete, never bothering to look up from his clipboard. He swallows, looking around for Steph. They'd agreed to meet at the entrance and check in together; yet she was seemingly absent. Part of him wanted to look for her, but the counselors made it clear that they didn't want any mingling between campers. So here he was, checking in without her.

He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. “I.. ugh. Peter. Spankoffski.” The counselor's eyes snap up towards him. Or more specifically towards his stomach.

“I- yes you are.” He says, eyes never leaving Pete's bump. As if sensing the tension, the baby chooses that exact moment kick hard enough to make Pete grunt in discomfort. That seems to spring the other counselor into action; he stands up, nudging another counselor who sits frozen and rushes to speak. “I need to go turn in my sheet in to my boss, but my colleague here can help check you in.”

Pete nods, suddenly aware of all the eyes on him. He adjusts his bag and turns towards the other counselor. “So, can you help me?”

“R-right. Peter S-sp… Peter S. Here you are.” He swallows and checks off his name. He makes quick work of checking his bags, confiscating the candy bars in his bag.

“I need those for my blood sugar.” Pete tries to protest.

“We have raisins. They're nature's candy.” The counselor seems to want to continue, but he's interrupted by two figures approaching. They're a man in a woman, both clad in that dumb ‘Virginity Rocks’ shirt that everyone was wearing. The man grins at him and Pete can't help but notice that his smile doesn't meet his vacant blue eyes. The woman, with her hair in pigtails in what Pete can only assume is some vain attempt to appear youthful, stares at him in something akin to pity.

“Go take your break, Elijah. We'll take it from here.” The counselor- Elijah- doesn't hesitate in scurrying away. The man turns to him, that smile widening slightly. “So you're the famous Peter. We've heard all about you.”

“We're so happy to have you here.” The woman adds, eyes fixated on his bump.

Pete nods, lips forming a thin line. “Yep, that's me. Peter Spankoffski.” They both seem to falter at his last name, blinking in stunned silence. Pete can't figure out why they would be shocked that he introduced himself, then it hits him: Jesus Christ, the prudes thought his name was too sexual. 

Then, as quickly as it came, the silence fades and the man jumps right back into action. “Well, it's nice to meet you, S-Man!” He says, then his eyes flick down to Pete's belly and he adds. “And company.”

“Yeah. Nice to be here.” Pete mumbles.

“I'm Jerry, spelt J-E-R-R-Y, head counselor and youth pastor here at Camp Idontwannabang. And this is my co-head counselor and youth pastor Jeri, spelt J-E-R-I. I know that might be a little confusing, so you can just call us Boy Jerry and Girl Jeri. Everybody does.”

Pete nods, wishing he could do anything to get out of this situation. He looks around, still no sign of Steph. “Right.”

“Mayor Lauter called ahead and told us all about your…. predicament. And I just want you to know that we have taken lots of measures to ensure your comfort here.”

“And you know Peter, you have nothing to be ashamed of. I know it must be so scary being a teen m-father, but I can promise that none of us here at Camp Idontwannabang will judge you for your past. We're so proud that you've managed to free yourself from the shackles of premarital sex. Even if it was too late to miss any… Side effects entirely.” Girl Jeri places a hand on his shoulder, her voice like Splenda. Cloyingly sweet, but too fake to be sugar.

She looks like she wants to say more, but Elijah returns before she can. “Your camp uniform.” He says, handing Pete a stack of blue cotton shirts.

“I…” Pete holds up the shirt in question. There was no way it would cover his stomach. “These are too small.”

Elijah shrugs. “Those are the size listed on your paperwork.” He states before walking away again.

Pete turns back to the Jerries. “I can't wear these.” They had to have some back ups, right? There was no way they would let him walk around in a shirt that could pass as a bra at abstinence camp. Right?

Girl Jeri’s lip pouts dramatically and Pete already knows the answer. “I'm sorry, but we don't have any bigger sizes.”

“You should have sent in a bigger size on your form. That way we could have prepared.”

“Mayor Lauter filled out those forms. Not me.” He tries to explain.

Boy Jerry only shakes his head. “Well I suppose you'll just have to make do. Beggars can't be choosers.” He clasps a hand on Pete's back, guiding him towards a cabin. “Now we've made some accommodations for you and your… special guest.”

“We know you won't be able to do some of the more physical activities but, we've prepared a special class on motherhood for you and the other girls to take. Not that you're a girl of course.” Girl Jeri assures him.

“We respect your right to be a father instead of a mother, S-Man!” Boy Jerry adds. “If you can't tell, we're a progressive ministry.”

“Gee, how amazing.” Pete deadpans.

“Now you'll be here until the end of the summer, or until you go into labor. At which point you'll be taken to the hospital. And then you can go home to be with your baby.” Girl Jeri explains. “So if you feel any contractions , just get one of us and we'll call for emergency services.”

“Ok. If that's all, can I go to my cabin?”

“That's the other thing.” Boy Jerry says, leading him towards a cluster of blue cabins. “We thought you might be a little more comfortable with some privacy in your condition.”

“So we decided to convert one of the solitary cabins into a private cabin just for you!” Girl Jeri explains as they reach their destination.

The blue cabin is old and clearly hasn't been used in quite some time. But that's not what gets Peter's attention. No, it's the sign right of the door that reads ‘GOMORRAH’ in blocky paint. He turns to Boy Jerry and raises an eyebrow.

“It's one of our solitary cabins so it doesn't get used as much. But we figured that you wouldn't want to be surrounded by other campers asking what it was like when you got pregnant.” He explains. Pete knows it's a lie. They don't want my sluttiness to infect the others, he thinks.

“Right.”

“Well, we'll leave you to settle in. Feel free to join us whenever you're ready, S-Man. And welcome to Camp Idontwannabang.” Jerry calls as he leaves, presumably going to file paperwork or greet campers, or to shame teenagers for wanting to do anything more than look at a girl. Girl Jeri lingers for a moment, her eyes dark as she stares at him in what could only be described as devastation. Then her lips spread into that fake smile once again and she leaves without so much as a goodbye.

Pete watches her leave before shaking his head. She was probably just so sad that pete dared to be a pregnant teen in public. Clearly she thought he was going to seduce all the innocent souls of the campers. He sighed. Time to unpack.

-

Pete leaves the cabin an hour later, clad in a too-small blue shirt, with one mission in mind: locate Stephanie. A mission made all the harder by everyone staring at him. Clearly, news of a pregnant camper had spread. Well, he'd known this was going to happen; he had to just suck it up and deal with it. And so, he took a deep breath and marched outside his cabin, ignoring the stares pointed his way.

Luckily, he didn't have to go far to find Steph. He'd barely taken 3 steps outside when she came barreling into view, pulling him into a tight hug. “Pete!”

“Hey.” He greeted, finally relaxing for the first time all day. “I was just about to look for you.”

“I wanted to wait for you but Grace fucking Chasity decided to give me a personal tour of camp. You know that she's the one who started the rumor that I was pregnant? God I hate that nerdy prude.”

“Sounds like her. She probably doesn't even know what trans means.”

Steph laughed. “She thinks I have a birth defect that gave me a penis. Which like, she's not wrong.”

Pete laughs at the joke and hugs her. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“I've missed you too.” Steph cups her hand over his bump. “How are you both feeling?”

“We're both okay. Don't worry.”

“I'm always going to worry about you Pete.”

He wants to kiss her, to tell her how much he loves her, but they're surrounded and he knows the counselors would never allow it. “I love you.” He risks saying.

She looks ready to kiss him, but they're interrupted by a voice over the PA system telling everyone that the welcome meeting was starting, and to please head to the stage area that you. Pete sighs and offers her a hand. “Sit with me?” He asks.

“There's no one else I'd rather sit with.” Steph takes his hand. They sit down in a set of chairs towards the back, and Pete briefly wonders why they were all called together.

His questions were answered when the Jerries walk out on stage wearing matching mics. They perform a cringey song about not having sex that Pete is luckily enough to to zone out during. He's also lucky to miss their sermon explaining exactly why abstinence was so important. In fact, it’s not until he hears Boy Jerry's voice explain, “Now, I know there’s some rumors circulating amongst you all, and I want to answer them.”, that he bothers to pay attention.

Pete pales as he continues to speak. “This year we have a very special camper with us. Now this camper hasn't always been abstinent, no. They've made some mistakes and they are paying for them. You see, this camper is pregnant.”

“But that won't stop us from loving them. Jesus teaches us to love all sinners.” Girl Jeri interrupts.

“You are right, Girl Jeri. You see this camper is ready to atone for their past and to learn our ways. Which is why I’d like to welcome Peter Sp… Peter S. to the stage! Get on up here S-Man!”

Peter isn't sure whether it’s horror or anger that fills him as the entire crowd of counselors and campers alike turn and stare at him, but whatever it is turn him to ice. Without thinking he stands and looks towards the stage.

“Come join us Peter!” Girl Jeri says.

He looks back to Steph: she's already out of her seat, ready to face whatever ridicule he’s about to experience alongside him. He can't let that happen. So Pete shakes his head. “I'll be ok.” He whispers and squeezes her hand.

Slowly, like moving through molasses, he makes his way to the stage. It feels like a nightmare: the crowd staring at his every move, the silence, the ill fitting clothing. But still he trudges forward, knowing that if he falters Steph will do something they'll both regret. He steps onto the stage and nods at the Jerries.

“Hi.” He says, voice tense.

“Welcome!” Girl Jerry passes him a mic. “Why don't you tell us about yourself.”

“Well my name is Peter Spankoffski,” A murmur rushes through the crowd at his name. “I'm 17, and I'm pregnant.”

“And what do you think of camp?”

“It's a nice camp.” He says, lying through his teeth. “Everyone is so… welcoming.”

“Of course we are.” Boy Jerry laughs. “Now how far along are you? 9 months?”

“6.” Pete clarifies. “I'm due at the end of the summer.”

“Wow. I thought you were further along, judging by the state of your shirt.” Boy Jerry grins. Soft laughter ripples through the crowd and Pete's face flushes in embarrassment. “Now, what is it like being pregnant?”

“I… Well, the morning sickness has finally ended. So that's nice. I'm pretty sore right now, but that's just cause the baby is kicking a lot. And I have to pee a lot now. ”

“Wow. Nausea, soreness, and frequent urination.” Girl Jeri exclaims. She turns towards the campers. “You see why abstinence is so important?”

“And that's before the baby is born.” Boy Jerry jokes.

Pete bristles at the comment. “Well it's not all bad. The baby has started kicking, and it's nice to feel them. I like knowing they're ok.”

The crowd gives a soft awe at his answer and Boy Jerry frowns. Then he takes a deep breath and turns back towards Pete.

“Perhaps, you could tell everyone how this happened?”

Pete blinks, “Excuse me?”

“Well,” Boy Jerry gives him a toothy that Pete briefly considers punching off his face, “you're clearly the most experienced person here. I thought you could impart a little wisdom on your fellow campers. That way they fully understand the dangers premarital sex.” He says that last bit in a whisper, as if actually speaking the words will cause him to burst into flames.

Pete swallows. “So, just to be clear, you want me to tell you how I got pregnant?” He can't keep the bitterness out of his voice as he speaks.

“We just want to support you, Pete.” Girl Jeri interrupts in a cloyingly sweet voice. “You're a victim of society's pressure for teens to have sex. This is a safe space to share.”

He looks around at the faces of his fellow campers: Grace Chasity sits up front and smiles at him like she's not the reason he's here in the first place. Steph is in the back, worrying her lip so much Pete is half convinced it'll bleed soon. He can tell she's blaming herself for this; like he wasn't just as eager of a participant as she was. Like they were excited to parent together. He looks down, the ‘Virginity Rocks’ stretched thin across his chest in sharp contrast with his swollen belly. It was already too tight, despite being the biggest size they had, and was only going to get tighter. He realized distantly that he's going to wear this shirt all summer.

And something in him snaps.

“Well I'm a virgin.” He shrugs.

“What?”

“I'm a virgin.” Pete lies through his teeth, “It was an immaculate conception; a kind and generous angel visited me in my sleep and when I woke up, poof.” He gestures to his belly.

The crowd breaks into excited whispers at his words. Girl Jeri begins ushering him off stage, muttering under her breath. He knows he'll probably pay for it later, but it's worth it for Pete to see that look of fury on Boy Jerry's face.

And then everyone goes silent as a voice rings out. “JUST LIKE MOTHER MARY!”

-

A/N: What's this? Hatchetfield-Omegaverse posting something that isn't Omegaverse? Well I know I took a really unexpected hiatus there and I wanted you all to see what I've been working on, even if it isn't Omegaverse. I hope you all enjoyed this! As always, thank you for reading and please feel free to tell me what you think in the comments! Shoutout to my lovely co-authors Spoons and Pizza and helping me write this!

This is a sequel to Tear Down My Reason by Calmly Chaotic and What An Ass, What A Bitch, What A Cuck by Calmly Chaotic and mars_of_the_stars, and i highly recommend you read them. They're amazing fics.

-

Taglist:

@lady-loveluck

@forever-forgotten-angel

[itsbenedict]

So this year went... not as good, vis-a-vis doing the things I wanted to do! Breaking down the goals...

Finish the first case of Justice/Arcana and revise the draft

Nnnnnope! I got through most of it, the players figured out the primary trick, but then I kind of hit a wall where I realized that I hadn't done enough to narrow down the culprit based on figuring out the trick. Doing so would require reworking the logistics such that the back room is the kitchen (an offscreen location the first draft never investigated) and characters have sandwich alibis. I've kind of got to go back to the drawing board here.

Finish the SakuraPetalFantasy walkthrough portion of Datasouls (not with the whole combat toy situation, just the rest of it)

Nope! I got chapter 4 done, but chapter 5 is only in an outline state right now. I did spend like a couple months doing Lost in Hearts instead, which built on the concept a little, but I didn't put in the work to finish things up.

Do 24 TFJ recaps, two per month

Nuh-uh. I got about halfway, but in addition to falling victim to my slump in the latter part of the year, TFJ itself kind of came to an unceremonious end due to some structural issues and player conflict. Current plan is to work with Farn to use the campaign as raw material to write a fantasy novel focusing on Saelhen.

Work through all the exercises in Genki 1 and 2, and catch up on WK reviews.

Nope- I mean, I caught up on reviews, but then fell out of the habit halfway through the year, and didn't finish the workbooks.

Date someone. I feel like I look decent and have a lot of desirable qualities that would make this not too hard to accomplish, but I have to put effort into looking or it’s never going to happen on its own. (I am unfortunately of the gender that doesn’t typically get asked out and has to take the initiative.) It’s gonna be tricky since I’m a weird person with weird life priorities and finding someone who’d actually be happy partnering up with that long-term is a tall order.

Haha, no. I wrote up a dating profile thing, and I did get one bite, but then she ghosted and it's been a couple months and it'd be awkward to try and go "hey, uh, are you still there?" at this point. I tried looking around myself, but I don't really know where to look- most dating sites are just hookup apps where you just swipe on faces nowadays, and that's useless to me. Everyone I've ever developed a crush on organically has been one of taken, ace, or lesbian, and at this point I have to assume there's a causal factor and I'm not just unlucky. I think I'm going to have to move somewhere more densely populated to have any shot at finding a good fit.

Actually get that standing desk walk-while-working workflow set up and establish an exercise routine that I keep to for more than half the year

Not quite. I did keep to an exercise routine for exactly seven months, but I didn't get the walk-while-working thing worked out- I haven't found any under-desk ellipticals that aren't extremely precarious and awkward to use while focusing on something else, so I'm thinking I should look for a mini treadmill next instead.

Release a functional version of that Fire Emblem content authoring tool

Nope! That was way more work than I expected- or at least, I expected I'd be able to keep working on it on and off throughout the year, which didn't happen. I did make pretty good progress, though- I'd say it's like, half done?

Replace grody old kitchen sink that has weird white stuff growing out from inside the handle

Okay I did do this one. But that was basically just a matter of ordering a thing on Home Depot and calling a plumber, so like, not exactly an achievement, just something I knew I'd keep forgetting to do indefinitely unless I put it on the list.

Finish the games I’m still playing through from this post

Almost! Still haven't finished The Sekimeiya, though I did make it far enough that I think I've got some kind of idea of how that egg thing works and how things fit together, even if there's a lot of gaps in the specifics.

Find some new source of income reliable enough to pay the bills without making me work more than 20 hours a week. (I’m a programmer, this is hypothetically doable.) Freelancing/contract work maybe?

Sorta? I did quit the horrible company that bought my division, but I stayed on as a contractor for miscellaneous stuff (and insisted on writing the noncompete clause out of the contract in negotiations, which they agreed to), and went back to work for the old company at the same time. At $100/hour, I worked an average of ten hours a week... kinda. The first five months or so, I worked almost not at all, living off my savings and doing odd jobs for less than my monthly expenses. The rest of the year, various disasters occurred and I was working my ass off putting out fires, so I was basically working full-time for much less than a full-time salary. I wouldn't say I nailed the employment situation, but I did keep my head above water.

How Come I Fucked Up?

Four reasons.

First, and smallest- halfway through the year was when the fires started at work and I started having way more stress and way less time. It was hard to focus on anything when something new was breaking and I was on the hook for it for months at a time.

Secondly: two of my grandparents died this year. Not only was this a pretty severe emotional blow, because they were amazing people and it's stupid and unfair that this happened- it also meant lots of traveling, to funerals and family events. It chewed through my budget and necessitated spending more hours on work, and left me exhausted and strung out for several weeks.

Thirdly and fourthly: the Elden Ring DLC came out, and also I got addicted to Pokérogue. I put... a stupid amount of hours into these games. Like two or three hours a day for multiple months. All my productive energy was consumed first by work, and then by vegging out and playing video games due to a lack of willpower.

This was a colossal failure. Like, from July onwards, I got practically nothing done. Half a year of my life, up in smoke! This is not sustainable. I need to do something major to course-correct here.

I think one thing that'll probably be worthwhile is... having failed to find a romantic partner, I need to move in with someone. I can resist the temptation to sit around like a lump doing repetitive videogames as long as there is some witness to my squalor. I'm very comfortable living alone, but I have to fight the temptation to vanish into comfort and never complete any of my many missions. I gotta have a friend around who can see when I'm wasting time, and cares at least a little about whether I'm getting things done.

So current plan is I'm moving to Providence with Farn pretty soon? And I'm going to try to land a flexible full-time position with just one of these companies I'm working with, so I can have health insurance and don't need to worry about being in the red during slow months.