#half of artefact storage???
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the-magnusinstitute · 7 months ago
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Has anyone ever come to give a statement about dentists or given you random teeth??
We have lots of statements about teeth! The filing system is, apparently, in some disarray, but Sasha (shoutout to Sasha) says they have a whole box just labelled ‘teeth’.
The contents of this box were not made clear to me. I can only assume they’re statements. You can apply on our website for a permit to come in and have a look!
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prokopetz · 1 year ago
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When I was a kid I read a lot of sword and sorcery fiction from the 1970s and 1980s, and there was an extremely specific recurring trope I encountered in those novels and literally nowhere else.
There'd be this villainous duo – typically servants of the principal villain – consisting of a scheming mastermind middle-aged father and his hyperviolent lunatic teenage daughter. The daughter would constantly fuck things up due to her erratic behaviour, and the father would put up with it because they were stuck in this intensely toxic codependent relationship that left the daughter with no meaningful social relationships apart from her father, and the father unable to refuse his daughter anything she wanted, no matter how unhinged.
I ran into this exact trope in at least half a dozen different novels by as many different authors, all in the same subgenre of fantasy literature, all clustered around the same period of time, and nowhere else. (To anticipate the inevitable request for recs, Sorcerer's Heir by Paula Volsky springs readily to mind; I'd have to drag my library out of storage to pin down the others I'm thinking of – it's been long enough that I'm not confident of my recollection of specific titles!) For over thirty years this remained the case, and I was prepared to chalk it up to simply being an artefact of its time.
So, with all this context in mind, imagine my surprise when I checked what was trending on Netflix around November of 2021.
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writingjourney · 2 years ago
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Unprecedented | Secondo x gn!Reader
Or: The four times you almost get Secondo to admit his feelings for you and the one time you succeed.
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Summary: Working with Secondo is only half as bad as people make it seem – at least until you fall in love with each other.
Content: 12.7k words, gn!reader, pining, sexual tension/suggestive language, food mention, blood/minor injury, forced proximity, soft secondo, terzo being a menace, smut-ish in part four but definite smut in part five (thigh riding, unprotected sex, penetration, dom/sub dynamics), 18+ MDNI
thank you for being patient with me, this is my first time writing Secondo, so pls go easy on me ♡
Masterlist – Ao3 link
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1 Voluntary Abstinence
The air gets colder by a few degrees as you take the last few narrow steps down the winding staircase into the basement. Burnt-down candles are illuminating the hallway from small alcoves, wax dripping down the weathered stone, their light flickering off the dark brick walls. Amongst these dancing shadows you make your way to the door at the other end of the hall. It’s made of iron, heavy and airtight, the rooms beyond kept on very specific temperature and humidity levels to preserve the precious items they’re protecting.
You push it open and find yourself in a small antechamber that leads into three different rooms – a tiny office, the restoration workshop and a small storage room. Entering this area always feels like stepping foot inside a secret laboratory, though it looks far less sterile with all the shelves of old tomes, paintings and other cursed as well as non-cursed artefacts.
“Papa?” you whisper upon closing the door.
“Office,” a steady voice calls back.
You find Papa Emeritus II bent over the desk, sorting through papers. He’s wearing his narrow reading glasses, the paint by his ears slightly smudged while his outfit remains pristine. Black slacks, a black button down shirt, sleeves rolled up casually, his usual black leather gloves switched for white cotton ones to avoid fingerprints and sweat stains.
He’s hard at work, has been for most of the morning, trying to save a rare first edition of Nietzsche’s Der Antichrist. He lets you observe him from time to time, ever since you expressed your genuine interest in his restoration work. His book-binding fascinates you the most so whenever an interesting project emerges, he lets you know and you get as much time off from your regular clergy duties as possible in order to learn from him. Lucky for you, Sister has no issue excusing you from time to time to help Papa down here. Not many Siblings have the patience or steady hands to work on these intricate projects and even less want to work with Secondo at all, if only for his understandably high standards when it comes to handling fragile artefacts.
“How is it going, Papa?” you ask casually.
“I am taking some time to document the process and sort through these,” he says. “My hands are a little too shaky for bookbinding right now.”
When you don’t reply, he finally looks up at you. His eyes appear bigger behind the glasses but he quickly takes them off, the marks now imprinted on his nose making you smile. Only the smile quickly vanishes when you take in his tired eyes. Even under the black make-up he looks exhausted, sleep-deprived and almost hungover, though you know he wouldn’t drink in the middle of a project like this. So there has to be a different cause.
Secondo, meanwhile, takes you in as well. You’re wearing the tight habit that hugs your body in all the right places today and he’s very pleased with that. Perhaps by now you’re aware it’s his favorite, he knows you’re observant like that, such a smart, sharp-witted thing you are. He’s trying very hard not to stare but you’re too busy worrying to notice.
“Are you feeling alright, Papa? You look… ugh.” You’re clearly trying to find a polite way to put it and it amuses him greatly. Even now you hesitate to speak your mind around him. “I mean, you seem like you’re in need of some rest.”
“Yes, sleep was not a priority last night.” He smirks to himself at the memory, he can still feel it in his sore muscles as well. “So you will have to excuse me looking a bit tired today, Sibling.”
Your lips press together into a thin line. “Oh. Of course.”
Secondo does not miss the hurt that’s flickering over your face. Once, he might have, but by now he’s seen this look so many times that he can catch it in milliseconds. The guilt he feels upon glimpsing it is the main reason he established certain rules in the first place. As a man with many lovers, Secondo had to find ways to stop anyone from developing any actual feelings for him that he cannot reciprocate. Most of the time, this isn’t a real issue, the intentions are clear, people seek adventures, a like-minded lover who can satisfy them in ways that others can’t. But from time to time expectations change, feelings get in the way and it’s so very human but very bothersome at the same time. Secondo has no desire to toy with anyone, so at the first hint of anything that goes beyond lust, he usually calls it quits to avoid inflicting any more pain than necessary.
But there is a key difference here: You’re not his lover.
“Well, I won’t keep you, Papa, I just wanted to see the progress and check in on you. I have to help out with lunch preparations now, but perhaps I can come back later,” you say without meeting his eyes again. “I wish you a productive day nonetheless.”
He wants to stop you and say something, only he’s not sure what there is to say at all. Please, do come back? Don’t leave yet? 
It’s only when you’re out the door that he realizes he could have just thanked you.
✦ ✧ ✦ 
Despite what occurred in his office before lunch, you’re back in the early afternoon hours, presenting him with some painkillers and a cup of black coffee. He can tell by the smell alone that this hasn’t been brewed in the kitchens; you clearly begged Terzo to let you use the fancy coffee machine in his office. It’s always worth it, even if Terzo teases him mercilessly when it comes to you by now, his little assistente, as he calls you.
You don’t comment on your hasty exit from earlier as you set down your cargo on his desk and take a seat on the wooden chair opposite from him. You’re staying for a while, it seems, that’s good. He can use your company after working alone in the basement all day.
Not used to someone taking care of him, Secondo tries not to show how your simple gesture affects him. “Thank you, my dove. This is just what I needed.”
You smile with genuine kindness, the sort of smile that always makes him pause as he feels its paralysing effect on him. “You’re welcome, Papa. Are you feeling any better?”
He smiles and takes a much needed sip of coffee. “Yes, but I think I should take a bit of a break from…” He stops, trying to word it carefully. “… the nightly activities.”
“Oh, really?”
Your eyes bore into his and it’s like you’re begging for the honest answer he simply cannot give you. Secondo knows – he knows of your feelings for him, he knows of your desires, your wishes, your hopes. And he’d be a liar if he claimed not to return them. But right now being a liar seems easier to him than admitting to any of this.
“I am not getting any younger and I can’t have it impacting my work too much,” he states instead, a lame excuse for certain. His stamina is impressive even now and his reputation precedes him. It’s the lack of sleep that’s affecting him more and more, some joint pains maybe, but even that is barely worth mentioning – he can focus when he has to. Satan knows he could have a Sibling or even a ghoul over every single night if he really wanted to.
There is only one reason he doesn’t find proper fulfilment in most of these nightly encounters anymore. And that reason is looking at him with wide and far too hopeful eyes right now.
“I’m sure some people will be very sad to hear that,” you finally say, glancing away.
Not you, no, he thinks.
You shift in your seat, then, and he can’t tell why exactly you’re so nervous all of a sudden. It could be the subject matter. He doesn’t take you for being shy, so maybe it’s because of your very obvious attraction to him, the mere idea that anything could happen between you, implied by the fact he’s telling you about his sex life right now when you’ve been lingering on a safe professional level for months.
Secondo is not in the habit of discussing his private matters with people who aren’t involved, as much as Terzo tries to coax the details out of him over drinks sometimes. He is a private person, discreet, not necessarily secretive but certainly disinterested in any sort of unqualified opinions. But with you he feels safe enough to at least hint at them, if only to see that delicious blush spread across your gentle face.
“Well, I’m not saying that I’ll stay abstinent forever,” he finally says, aware that he’s sending out very mixed signals. “But I think I will be more selective from now on.”
You look at him again and your eyes still shimmer with expectation. He almost hates himself for giving you false hopes. But he can’t help it, you just look so stunning when you’re flustered for him, when your eyes circle in on his bare forearms, his gloves, his lips, your breathing becoming heavier by the second. Arousal suits you, he decides. It takes a lot of restraint to withstand the urge to show you what he could do to you if he just gave in. And this is certainly not the first time the image of fucking you on this very desk pops into his head.
In the end, you don’t comment. It’s something he appreciates a lot about you, the fact that you know when to shut up. And for the rest of the afternoon, while you watch him work on the Nietzsche, standing idly by the side with your eyes glued to his hands, you barely say another word. But you don’t have to – the very telling smile that never leaves your face speaks for itself.
✦ ✧ ✦ 
2 Papa’s Personal Pasta Day
Wednesday is Pasta Day.
Three different types of pasta, three different types of sauce you get to choose from. It’s the best day of the week, everyone agrees – even Secondo.
And yet your Papa is nowhere to be found today.
It’s not rare for him to skip lunch or avoid the bustle of the dining hall, but you always, without a doubt, catch him here on Wednesdays. As you eat the remainders of your own meal, staring at the empty spot next to his brothers where he usually sits, you wonder what keeps him occupied. You know he finished the Nietzsche but you also know that he recently got another box filled with rare books. So the only real explanation is that he’s even busier with those now.
Which means he’s skipping lunch altogether.
A sudden movement in your peripheral vision. Terzo stands up with his tray, though you can already see two Siblings scurrying towards him, ready to do the job for him. Without thinking too much you gulp down your last bite and hurry after him, asking a friend to dispose of your empty plate, an idea forming in your mind.
You catch him in the hallway as he’s sauntering back to his office, humming a merry tune.
“Papa!” you call out to avoid running after him for another five minutes.
“Hm?” Terzo spins around, smiling in recognition. “Oh. Buongiorno, Sibling. Don’t you look so well today?”
“Thank you, Papa. I was wondering if you can you spare me a moment?”
“Ahh, for you always!” The corners of his mouth curl up into smirk. “I hope you don’t come to complain about my fratello? Because that list is already very long.”
You assure him it’s not a complaint and follow him to his office. Once inside, he casually leans against his desk, folding his hands neatly in front of him as he awaits your plea. A few dots of red pasta sauce stain his right glove but you’re too nervous to point them out to him.
“I have a… a request,” you start, fidgeting under his intense gaze. “It’s unusual and I totally understand if you won’t allow me such a thing. But…  can I use your kitchen?”
“My kitchen?” he asks, brows shooting up in surprise. “Whatever would you use my kitchen for?”
You blush profusely as you start to explain. “It’s just… your brother skipped lunch today and you know he’s working so hard on these books right now. He probably forgot to eat again and it will give him another headache in approximately two hours. I would ask to use his kitchen, of course, but then it wouldn’t be a surprise anymore and you know I can’t use the Ministry kitchens because they’re busy in there now cleaning up. And I really don’t want to bring him reheated leftovers.”
Terzo considers this, considers you. “Oh Sibling, you really do like him, eh? What is it that you see in him? He’s a grumpy old man with no sense of humour.”
“He’s not so grumpy when we’re alone,” you offer, even more heat creeping up your neck. “And he can be funny, in a kind of dry, unintentional way.”
“Hmmmm. My coffee machine, my kitchen…” Terzo furrows his brow, the skull paint on his face giving him a slightly menacing look. “What is next? My bedroom?”
Your eyes widen. “Oh no! No, it’s not that kind of… not that kind of thing.”
Terzo chuckles and his features relax, making way for genuine amusement. “No? You want to tell me you don’t fuck down there?”
“N-no…”
“Ah, well, so it is on me to give it a little nudge?” His hand moves up to his chin in mock contemplation as he smiles at you. “Va bene, you can use my kitchen but I have one condition.”
You give him a pleading look, folding your hands in front of your chest. “Whatever you want, Papa, I will gladly do it.”
He smirks again, fishing for his keys before throwing them at you. “I expect some leftovers in the fridge tonight. And they better be good.”
✦ ✧ ✦ 
Carrying a tray down the narrow steps into the basement is not an easy feat, especially because your mind constantly tries to tell you that this is a bad idea and you forget to watch your steps. In the humidity underground the stone gets especially slippery, just like your situation with Secondo. You’re not quite sure how he’s going to take this. You shouldn’t have made such an effort. This whole idea was born from mere intuition, from that pathetic need to impress him that you always carry around with you.
But you just can’t control that tiny part of you that wants to prove just how perfect you are for him, how well you’d take care of him if he just allowed you to be in his life – no matter how unlikely that is.
You just hope it’s not awful, especially since Terzo is going to eat that big bowl of pasta you left in his fridge. To be fair, his kitchen looked like it had never been used before, so at least you don’t have to worry that you messed up his routine.
You sigh in relief when you see that the lights are on in the workshop. You can hear Secondo in the main room, so you set the tray down in his office, the only area down here where eating is actually allowed, and then knock very carefully to avoid startling him.
“Oh.” His eyes land on you and sets down the book in his hand that already looks mostly finished. “Good morning, Sibling.”
You lift your eyebrows with a smile. “Hello, Papa. Though I’m afraid I have to tell you that it is not quite morning anymore.”
He eyes the clock on the wall above him, exhaling in defeat. “I forgot the time, to be honest. I missed lunch, no?”
You linger near the door, ready to take the plunge. “Well, you did, but… are you hungry by any chance?”
✦ ✧ ✦ 
Secondo is not quite sure what to expect when you lead him into the office. What he certainly didn’t expect was a tray that resembles the ones used for room-service in the upscale hotels he loves to frequent, cloche and napkin included. He knows you have good taste by being around you so often, but that it is this excellent is news to him. The thought of you choosing this fancy dishware for him is almost enough to make him smile.
“So you brought me lunch?” he asks, though he should not be surprised by your efforts. You’re always attentive, you most likely noticed him missing earlier and pieced it all together.
“I made this in your brother’s kitchen,” you warn him. “So, he might ask about it.”
As he takes a seat behind the desk, Secondo’s brow furrows. “You made it? It’s not from the kitchens?”
At this question you bite your lip. He tries not to stare at your mouth. “Uhm, I made it, yes. I didn’t want to bring you stale leftovers and besides, they didn’t have your favorite today…”
Secondo leans back in his chair. He can tell that you expect him to scold you, to tell you that he wouldn’t have minded the leftovers, that you shouldn’t waste your time on such a thing, but that’s not what’s on his mind at all. To anyone else, he might have said these things, but to you? He feels his heart swelling in his chest at the gentle care you offer him, an altogether unfamiliar feeling, so all he can really do is stare at you in wonder.
You seem uneasy under his lingering gaze, your restless hands fiddling with your habit. “Okay, well, I should leave you to it. I have other dut–”
“No, no, you stay,” he commands and there is no room to question him. He will not let you scurry off again, not this time.
He waits for you to take a seat before he removes the cloche from the plate, revealing a beautiful serving of Spaghetti Cacio e Pepe, complete with freshly ground pepper on top as well as some half-molten parmigiano. He fails to suppress a surprised exhale as he takes in the food. It’s a beautiful plate, one he may well find in one of his favorite restaurants in Rome or Milan.
“How do you know what is my favorite?” he asks, spreading the napkin out over his lap.
“Oh well, I’ve… I’ve seen you get it for lunch whenever they offer it… Maybe it’s not your favorite, I just assumed…”
“It is my favorite,” he admits. “You’re very observant, my dove. I should be more careful around you, eh?”
You smile at him and the corner of his mouth curls upwards as well before he quickly averts his gaze. Secondo grabs the fork and moves it around in the pasta, his stomach giving an urgent growl. It’s beyond him how he managed to miss lunch being this hungry, but you made sure to give him his very own Pasta Day and a much better one at that.
From your side of the table, his feelings are still veiled in shadows, hidden by the severity of his features. You can’t quite tell what he’s thinking, but you have to admit that the situation is a bit awkward because all you do is sit here and watch him eat. Secondo, completely unbothered, has quickly finished half of what you put on his plate and you feel mildly concerned that you didn’t bring enough. He moans softly every few seconds and you struggle to hide what it does to you. There is something inherently erotic about this man eating your food, the way he seems to treasure every single bite, how he licks the sauce off his painted lips before using the napkin to gently clean them, leaving a mouth-shaped black stain on the cloth. It’s not hard to imagine the same shape covering every inch of your body, an entirely unhelpful thought. Secondo can’t hear how rapidly your heart is beating in your chest, but he may well notice how you sit there with your thighs pressed together, hands covering your lap.
“It’s good?” you ask for distraction, fiddling with a loose thread on your sleeve.
“Very good,” he states. “Have you not tried it?”
“Uh… well I had to hurry down here before it got cold.”
Secondo fills another fork, expertly wrapping the spaghetti around its tines. Then he holds it out to you, his other hand kept flat underneath it, and you realise that he wants you to eat. 
That he wants to feed you.
Your chest feels like exploding as you lean over the desk to reach him. Eyes locked with his, you slowly open your mouth, pushing your tongue out just enough to give him a glimpse. His hand doesn’t move, in fact he’s completely static as his eyes move to your open mouth. They stay glued there, his own lips parting just slightly. The expression turns his features unusually soft.
“Papa?” you ask, trying to hide a grin.
Secondo looks back into your eyes, but before he can move, you wrap your lips around the fork and slowly drag the spaghetti off. He watches your every move and his reaction gives you the courage to continue. You moan softly at the taste, the intense aroma of the Pecorino still evident in the sauce and it is good, you have to give yourself credit for that.
You hum vocally, a sound that hits Secondo like a brick.
You’re so deliciously unaware of the pain he’s going through, how the sight of you licking your lips nearly drives him insane. Your tongue darts out to reach the corner of your mouth, but there is some sauce closer to your chin that you have to remove with your thumb. When you suck it off the digit, Secondo has to fight a deep groan and it comes out as a strangled cough. His cock is twitching in his pants, already half-hard, and he knows he has to get a grip. You’re eating, it shouldn’t have such an impact on him.
“I may need some more practice,” you say, sitting back in your chair. “But I would say it’s better than in the kitchens.”
“You’re modest,” Secondo states. “It was perfect, my dove, thank you. I could not have prepared this dish any better and I have made it a hundred times.”
An almost shy smile, only betrayed by the way your lips quiver as you hold back your delight at his praise. “You’re flattering me, Papa, I’m sure you’re way more proficient than I am.”
It’s an endearing look on you, a hopeful sort of confidence, laced with a hint of hesitation. He’s not sure where his next words come from, but despite their barely hidden meaning he can’t hold them back. “I hope I get the chance to return the favor soon. I think I know what your favorite is and I happen to know the perfect recipe.”
Your grin widens, your whole expression one of warmth and joy and he’s rendered speechless for a very conspicuous amount of time.
“Should I get rid of the tray?” you ask. “I think your brother wants his dishes back.”
He finds his words again at the mention of Terzo. “Only if you come back down here after. I need your help this afternoon or I am going to miss dinner as well.”
“Certo, Papa,” you say, mimicking his Italian. “I will be back before you notice that I’m gone.”
You grab the tray and he watches your figure disappear through the door, slumping back in his chair with a myriad of thoughts and feelings running through his mind that he can’t possibly catch up with. His hand finds his crotch as soon as you’re out of sight, adjusting just enough to get rid of the painful tightness in his pants. 
At least this time he didn’t forget to thank you.
✦ ✧ ✦ 
3 Seeing Red
He’s trusting you with a Crowley.
It’s unprecedented. Secondo had Siblings watching before, he had them assist him before by bringing him tools, but never before has he allowed them to touch any of his delicate books.
It’s the next logical step. You have been watching him for months now, you have practiced on less valuable books and shown unexpected talent. And even now, with the Crowley in hand, he’s surprised to find himself trusting you completely.
Inexplicably, his eyes find you ever few minutes without his own doing. It’s not to control you, though maybe a tiny part of him does indeed check in with the state of your work. Whenever you look back, you hold his gaze so confidently. It’s intoxicating to have your eyes on him, fully aware that you reciprocate the feeling, and even when you don’t look back, seeing you so patiently focused on the needle in your hands is quite the sight.
His staring doesn’t stay unnoticed. You catch him looking at you for the tenth time in the past few minutes, though that is only a rough estimate. As elated as you are by his attention, you’re genuinely getting frustrated with him. He has to feel the tension between you. You refuse to believe that all those lingering looks are meaningless to him.
A sudden sharp pain in your finger. You hiss, more in surprise than in pain, and quickly pull away. The thick, curved needle pierced your white cotton glove and dug straight into your skin. By pulling it out so rapidly, you must have damaged an artery or at least left a pretty big wound because the blood spills out immediately. The shock only lasts for a quarter of a second before you pull your hand away, just in time before a few heavy droplets of blood drip down your wrist and onto the floor. Fortunately, the book still looks pristine and you take a shuddering breath of relief.
“What happened?” Secondo asks.
“I… I–”
Before you can explain, he’s by your side, roughly grabbing your arm to hold it steady.
“I didn’t bleed on the book,” you stammer. “I pulled my hand away really fast.”
His grip on your wrist is impossibly tight and you wonder if he’s going to scold you for your clumsiness, for being so distracted. His lips are pressed together as he takes in your shaky frame, his eyes meeting yours with such intensity that you struggle not to break away and you feel your lips quivering as you fight back tears.
“I’m so sorry, I– I didn’t–”
“I don’t care about the book,” he says and then he pulls you out of the workshop. Once you’re safely back in his office, he leaves for the storage room. You stand there, watching the blood run over your hand, pressing your thumb into your pulse in hopes of limiting the blood flow just like he did. But the once white glove is ruined by now, blotchy and red all over.
When Secondo returns, he carries a first aid kit. He sits down on the chair in front of his desk and motions for you to join him. You carefully step beside him, hand out-stretched in a cautious offering, but he’s having none of it, he just pulls you straight into his lap and grasps your wrist again.
“Let’s examine the damage,” he says, even though you’re not sure you can even hear him. His strong thighs are firm underneath yours, keeping you steady, but then there’s the throbbing in your finger, his hand on your arm, a wild mixture of impressions that overflow your sensory perception. Your rapid heartbeat surely does nothing to help with the bleeding.
You fight the urge to shift nervously but he doesn’t seem to notice your state, just turns your hand skyward and gets to work. He meticulously removes your bloody glove, one finger at a time, the fingertips of his own turning red in the process. Frustrated by the barrier, he removes them as well, throwing them aside with an annoyed grunt. Once his bare hands grasp yours, you feel a shiver running down your spine. The pain in your finger ceases to exist for a moment as you realise that this is the first skin on skin contact you ever shared. You’re closer than ever, so close you can smell the remainders of his cologne, feel his exhales on your skin.
“It’s not as bad as I thought,” Secondo muses. “You hit a bad spot.”
“I’m so sorry,” you whisper. “I’m not usually so careless.”
“I know, my dove. It happens.”
Not to me, you want to say, not while I’m here, trying so hard to impress you.
“Go wash out the wound,” he orders then, his hand patting your hip in encouragement, dangerously close to your ass.
You reluctantly hop off his legs and wash your hand in the sink in the workshop. The water runs red at first but turns clear in the matter of seconds. With the blood gone, the wound only looks half as scary and you’re far less shaky when you return to the office.
You expect Secondo to just leave you to yourself now, but he immediately pulls you back into his lap, turning slightly to reach into the first aid kid on his desk, fiddling for bandaids and a spray bottle with disinfectant. You patiently hold out your hand, waiting for him to figure out the logistics.
The antiseptic stings and you flinch, more from shock than actual pain. Secondo is so careful, not a single tremor in his deft fingers as he applies the bandaid, making sure it sits tight around your still throbbing digit.
“There,” he says. “It is better now, yes?”
You nod, sniffling as you try to calm down. “Thank you, Papa.” 
His mismatched eyes meet yours and the concerned furrow in his brow softens. One of his hands rests on your hip, the other comes up, hovering by your jaw as though he’s scared to touch you. You feel his fingertips grazing your skin, tickling, exploring cautiously.
His gentle touch gives you courage. You lean in slowly and press your lips to his cheek. The feeling of his skin against your lips is so soft that you linger, kissing again and again, slowly moving them further down while one of your hands skims his other cheek. Your last kiss hits the corner of his mouth and you hear him suck in a sharp breath through his nose. His lazy grip on your hip suddenly tightens until you can feel the tips of his fingers digging into your flesh.
You sit back and look at him. There is something wild in his eyes now, a flicker of… you can’t quite decide if it’s lust or anger. For a long moment he stares at you like this, a terrifying expression that keeps you static. Right when you come to the conclusion that he must be angry, that you have to apologise, his hand shoots up to grab your chin and then his fingers push into your hair, his second hand joining in until he’s properly holding your head. He growls and presses his lips together until his whole face is tense.
“Papa,” you whisper. “Did I–“
He shuts you up by moving to stand, simultaneously lifting you onto his desk and pushing himself between your legs until your chest is pressed to his. The first aid kit flies to the floor, but the impact is only evident by a distant cluttering because all you can focus on is him. Secondo’s hands find your head again, holding it in place as he continues to stare at you, eyes moving from your lips to your nose to your cheeks that are squished between his palms, and then, finally, they meet yours.
You think he’s going to kiss you as he leans in, but then his head abruptly turns to the side and he buries his face in your neck. With a groan, he pulls you further into him, squeezing so tightly that you lose your breath.
“You’re killing me,” he mumbles. “Oh, my dove, you will end me.”
”Papa–“
Another groan. He sounds like he’s suffering, a wounded animal about to turn into roadkill. You don’t quite understand. It feels good to be so close to him, to have him hold you like this, so you simply sink into his embrace, move your unhurt hand to the back of his neck and softly scratch his scalp. He sighs deeply, slowly relaxing against you.
“What is this?” you mumble.
He gives a dry chuckle. “I wish I knew.”
✦ ✧ ✦ 
4 The Storage Closet Incident
Are you high on glue and paint solvent? Maybe.
In any case, your head is spinning. You spent all morning so far sorting through a fresh delivery of restoration materials, taking inventory and checking if they’re complete. Papa was here earlier to check in with you but left for a clergy meeting half an hour ago, so you’re left alone inside the storage room. There are three more boxes outside in the hallway and you’re on your fourth now, different types of paints and solvents and glue. You never opened any of the cans but you swear you nevertheless inhale the biting fumes.
Upon crossing out the last few items on your list, you hear a heavy knock. Maybe you should be cautious with opening considering that no one ever knocks here, but you do indeed find Secondo in front of the entrance, still fully robed.
“Forgot my keys upstairs,” he mumbles, patting down his pockets as though they would magically appear if he just tried hard enough.
“You can take the ones inside the storage room for the rest of the day,” you suggest.
“Humph.”
He’s usually in a pretty foul mood after clergy meetings that involve his father, so you’re not surprised by the lack of conversation. You watch him pull the keys out of the lock – the door stays open while you’re busy in the storage room anyway – and when he carries them into his office, you think nothing of it. Any potential concern would have escaped you at the latest when you catch him shedding his robes through the open door. As soon as they’re hung up on the coat rack in the corner, you can’t help but sigh. He’s wearing his classic black shirt underneath – black because it won’t show the paint stains on his collar. But it barely touches his neck anyway; he keeps it open just enough to display the first few inches of dark, curly chest hair. You take in his slender form, the taut muscles on his arms stretching out the fabric as he moves around, sorting through the papers on his desk, hands covered in tight black leather gloves that perfectly match his belt.
“So…” He looks up and catches you staring. “How is inventory going?”
“Great,”you say, finally looking back at your actual work. “I’m more than halfway done.”
“Good,” he says. “You’re fast.”
You smile when you deposit the last bottle of glue onto the shelf. “Speaking of inventory, can you help me carry the rest of the boxes? I left the big ones for when you get back.”
He’s already back out of the door before you even finish your sentence, carrying one of the heavier cartons inside to where you’re standing. You push it in front of the designated shelf and wait for him to bring the other two boxes in as well – carrying both at the same time. On his way inside he bumps against the open door to the storage room and it falls close behind him. He sets the boxes down and you notice him flinching as he rights himself, even though he covers it up with a low cough. You make a mental note to acquire something for his back pains, perhaps Primo can whip up some sort of tincture or cream. And even though you highly doubt Secondo would let you rub it into his back, the image is very clear in your mind now.
You hide your deepening blush by pulling out your neat little list, flipping through the pages without actually reading anything. “Thank you, Papa. I’ll spend the rest of the afternoon sorting these until Sister needs me.”
He moves to reach out for your arm, but his hand drops before he ever reaches it. “Thank you, my dove. I know it’s tedious work.”
You smile at him, a little disappointed that he didn’t touch you. “Well, I’m happy to help in any way I can.”
His gaze lingers on you for a little longer before he pulls himself away to return to the office. Only then do you realise that something is very odd in here. The door is closed. Fully closed. With no functioning door handle inside, you have no way of getting out without the keys. For a second, all you can do is stare at the metal bar used to pull it open – and the very empty hole where the key would usually be found.
“You have the keys, Papa,” you remind him.
“I don’t,” he states. “They’re on the desk.”
His lips are pressed together tightly and you can feel the colour draining from your face.  No one ever comes down here, there is no chance people are going to find you anytime soon, at least not before your friends notice you missing.
You swear you can hear him mumble a cazzo, before he lets his forehead rest on his hand, massaging his temples, but your heart is beating so fast that it drowns out all other sounds. You’re not necessarily panicking, even though you do suddenly begin to wonder whether you’re secretly claustrophobic or not.
“It’s fine, I have my phone,” he says but you already know there won’t be any reception down here. Your suspicion is confirmed when he sets it down on the shelf next to him with a little too much force.
“My friends will probably come looking for me when I miss lunch.”
He looks over to you and suddenly his expression changes. There is a glimmer of something almost dangerous in his white eye that makes him look menacing, the effect only amplified by his skull paint and the sharp lines of his cheekbones. You back against the wall behind you, unable to look away despite your body telling you to be on alert. The last time he looked at you like this was when you hurt your hand and you wonder if he’s finally going to initiate more. The thought is arousing and bone-chilling at the same time.
”Papa–“
“Are you scared?” he interrupts, reading you perfectly.
“No,” you reply. “I’m not claustrophobic.”
He approaches you slowly, the soles of his black leather shoes squeaking on the linoleum floor. “That is not what I meant.”
When he stops right in front of you, you swallow, your throat suspiciously dry all of a sudden. You can smell him over the paint solvent now, his cologne so heavy in your nose that you get dizzy. If you weren’t high before, then you are definitely high now. Instead of fear, you suddenly feel incredibly, stupidly bold, full of adrenaline and longing.
“I’m not scared of you,” you say somewhat confidently. “I’m not scared of being alone with you.”
You should be, his eyes are telling you. Even closer now, he leans into you, his hands resting on the wall on either side of your head. You know the eye contact is something he enjoys so you keep your eyes on him without flinching away.
“If I had you right here right now no one would hear you screaming.” He chuckles uncomically, his voice deeper than you’ve ever heard it before. “I could do to you whatever I want.”
“Then why don’t you?”
He furrows his brow. “Hm?”
“Why the hell don’t you?” you challenge. “Why don’t you show me what you want to do to me?”
He seems taken aback by this, staring down at you with his lips slightly parted. For a second you think he’s going to snap back, scold you for disrespecting him, but he just huffs out a laugh. “You know why.”
“No I don’t!” You fight back tears as all of your suppressed emotions threaten to spill out. A strangled sob almost swallows your next words. “I don’t.”
Secondo stares at you and you finally look away, trying hard to stay quiet. You know this is not what he expected to happen and neither had you. But you can’t stop, you’ve lost control over your emotions and now that the cork has been removed you can’t get it back inside.
“I keep trying to find a reason why you don’t want me.” You force your gaze to meet his once more, despite being afraid of what you’re going to see in his eyes. “What’s wrong with me, Papa? What do I lack that the others before me had? What is wrong with me that you don’t even want me for a night?”
You’re crying now, struggling to make sense of him. Frankly, you’re already embarrassed by your outburst and expect him to laugh it off or gently tell you that he appreciates you but just doesn’t feel attracted to you like that. Even him yelling at you would help at this point.
“My dove–”
“Don’t call me that.”
He cocks his head to the side, his lip quivering slightly. “Where is this coming from now?”
You don’t reply, even though your pout should be answer enough. Secondo regards you for a long moment but there is no anger, only curiosity.
“Who knew you could be so feisty?” he mumbles, leaning in even closer but turning away just before your mouths can touch. 
His lips ghost over your cheek, down your jaw, but they never touch. All you can feel is his hot breath on your skin, the tip of his nose dragging over your cheekbone. You squirm, letting out a desperate, high-pitched whimper. Secondo chuckles against your ear and the unfamiliar sound goes straight to your core, goosebumps running all over your body.
“You’re cruel,” you whisper. “So cruel.”
“I am.” His lips touch the shell of your ear. “But you seem to enjoy it.” 
Impulsively, you wrap your hands around his neck for support. Secondo moves to look at you again, his pupils blown wide with lust. This time, you close the gap by leaning in, but he turns away just slightly, the tip of his nose brushing against yours. You try again, more boldly this time, and you swear your lips are already grazing his, but then they’re gone again. His hand moves to grip your chin painfully tight, his thumb digging into your cheek so hard you can feel it pressing against your teeth. You’re completely immobile and when you test it out, his grip tightens even more. You’re pretty sure you’ll find subtle bruises all around your jaw tomorrow.
Secondo’s mouth still hovers just in front of yours, his exhales tickling your face, but he remains just out of reach. You whimper in desperation and he chuckles again, nuzzling your nose.
“Not so bold anymore now, eh?”
“Please,” you whine, squirming in his grip.
“Please what?”
You let out a half-strangled mewl. “P-please.”
Secondo hums and he can feel your body shivering underneath his, muscles jerking, everything inside of you trying to reach for more. He knows he’s being cruel, knows that you’re suffering, but he can’t deny that the thrill of having you at his mercy like that is spurring him on. He wants to test out your limits, see how far he can go, if he can get you to beg even more. You’re always so good, so quiet and polite. Seeing those previously unknown sides of you is like unwrapping a birthday gift and why should he stop when there is still so much more to explore?
You whimper louder this time and he brings his other hand to your waist, pulling you flush against him. A gasp and your mouth stays open just slightly, lips wet and glistening with spit, still pushed into a beautiful little pout bis his gloved fingers. He pushes his erection against you, eliciting a moan from you that seems to come from somewhere deep within. It’s what tips him over the edge, his patience dissolving into thin air. He unravels, closing the gap and swallowing all of your other sounds with his mouth. The kiss is sudden and almost violent. He has to release your jaw to ease the pressure on your head, but he just moves his hand down to your neck instead. More moans and whimpers as his tongue pushes into your now open mouth and it’s adorable how you keep trying to move against him. He rewards your efforts by easing up just slightly, allowing you to taste him as well. 
Secondo is not sure what’s taking hold of him but he can’t fight the urge to taste more of your body. You’re all breathless when his mouth moves to your cheek and over your jaw, soothing, exploring. His lips find the soft skin below your ear, a shiver running down his neck. He can feel the tendon there twitching underneath his tongue and then he’s just sucking with reckless abandon, his intensity the result of a week-long, maybe even month-long starvation.
You moan into his ear and he thinks he’s going to lose it, his hips move on their own accord, pushing against you. It’s not a lot of friction but it’s enough to extract a deep groan from him. He wants to let go, he wants to have you so bad that it’s starting to obscure all rational thought. But he can’t lose control like that, not right now. As a safety precaution he pulls away, slotting his knee between your legs instead. With his hand on your hips he pulls you forward and you groan at the friction. A strangled sob and you try to wriggle for more. It’s uncomfortable with all the layers of clothing in between. His own pants are so tight that it provides him more pain than relief but to see you unravelling under his ministrations is enough to keep him going.
“Please,” you whisper, wriggling even more but his hand on your hips stays firm. He can feel the fabric of his pants getting wet under your movements, your crotch hot against his leg.
“Feels like you’re leaking onto my thigh,” he whispers back. “You’re such a mess, my dove, and I haven’t even done anything yet.”
You moan again, completely beyond words. He had this coming, he knows it. This was bound to happen at some point, the inevitable. But you’re at his mercy now and Secondo knows how to handle responsibility. He can see in your eyes that you’re too far gone now and for a second this clarity hits him like a brick. It’s almost like he’s watching the scene from above, bird’s eye view. This is exactly what he did not want – to fuck you like it’s just that, like it’s just sex, a quick romp in a closet, not even fully undressed, no real intimacy. Right now, it’s all you want, it’s all he wants, but what’s going to happen after?
Secondo pulls his head back to assess the situation, but when he sees the slowly drying tears on your cheeks, your still watery eyes, his paint and spit smeared all over your face and neck, he can’t bring himself to say any words that could possibly hurt you.
He’s lucky to be spared any excuses by a plethora of muffled noises in the background. Your eyes widen at the same time as he hears them and reality slowly settles around you again.
“Fratello?” The voice is barely audible through the thick door. “Secondo? Hellooooo?”
He acts faster than you even seem to realise what’s going on, gently letting go of you in favour of banging his fist against the door as rapidly as he can, trying to draw attention to you. There is barely any time to recover. The door opens after a minute and you find Terzo glancing into the room, hands still on the key in the lock.
“Oh, there you are, Secondo. Got locked inside, eh?” Then he smirks. “And with your little assistente no less. Tesoro, you look so flustered, did my brother–”
“Stai zitto,” Secondo snaps, pushing past him before his brother can get any good glimpse at the situation in and on his pants. “What do you even want down here?”
“Oh, thank you, caro fratellino, for saving us from being locked inside this room all day.”
A scoff. Secondo’s eyes find you again when you close the door of the storage room behind you and you struggle to meet his eyes. A pang of guilt, fear even, of what is going to happen now.
Terzo, completely unhelpful, looks between the two of you. “So, what happened here, eh? What did I miss?”
“Nothing, Papa,” you say quickly. “The door closed but it doesn’t have a handle on the inside. We had to use the key for something else earlier and forgot to put it back.”
“That’s not what I meant, tesoro.” Terzo glances at his brother and then back at you, furrowing his brow now that he’s seeing you both in proper lighting. There is a sudden edge of concern on his face. “Sibling, you look like you’ve been crying.”
Secondo is surprised that this is the first thing his brother comments on. You avoid both of their gazes, wringing your hands behind your back. “Oh, it’s nothing. I should probably go… I need to get back to work and I’m already late. Sister won’t be happy.”
Terzo cocks his head to the side, stopping you before you can walk out. He talks in a hushed, gentle voice, practically shutting Secondo out. “You should take a moment to calm down, tesoro, have a trip to the bathroom before you face Sister. You’re quite the mess.”
You nod at him, a grateful smile on your face, and then your eyes meet Secondo’s. A quarter of a second, nothing more, and he has no chance to convey anything with his expression. You give Terzo another pained smile and then you hurry outside.
The two man both wait for you to close the door  before they face each other. Secondo has settled behind his desk by now, a healthy distance between them that seems to be the only thing keeping their tempers in check. Secondo can’t help but scowl, gripping the edge of the table so tight that his knuckles turn white. “This is none of your business, Terzo. I don’t meddle in your affairs.”
“Why did they cry?” Terzo asks, unimpressed. “What did you do?”
“Why do you ask it like that?”
“It’s usually not a good sign when someone cries after making out, fratello. Don’t think I cannot see your ruined make-up. Your little assistente looked even worse.”
Secondo almost jumps from his chair. “You think I would hurt them?”
“I don’t think you would hurt them,” Terzo explains calmly. “Not physically at least. But everyone sees how they look at you, stronzo, how you look at each other.  Did you fuck up?”
Secondo breathes out a sigh, his hand relaxing as he leans back in his chair. “I don’t know.”
Terzo takes a few cautious steps towards him. “Look, I know, you’re not the type, you don’t fall in love, blablabla. But it is never too late to settle down if you find your person, you know? It may feel like giving up your freedom, but look at what you gain.” 
“Aha. And what is that?”
Terzo smirks. “Someone who puts up with all of your bullshit.”
A drawn-out pause as they stare at each other.
Finally, Secondo exhales all the stowed anger, shaking his head incredulously. “I can’t believe you’re trying to explain to me how relationships work. You.”
Terzo shrugs, moving back towards the exit. “Think about it. You are going to feel so much more balanced.”
He’s halfway out the door when Secondo notices that he never told him why he was here in the first place. Thinking back, he’s not sure he’s ever seen his brother in this workshop or anywhere close to this part of the basement before.
“What did you want down here?” he calls after him.
“Huh?” Terzo turns back to him, shrugging nonchalantly. “Ah, you know, a ghoul noticed you two were trapped in there and to be honest… I’m kind of invested now.”
✦ ✧ ✦ 
5 Returning the Favour
A note.
You pick up the weighty envelope that someone, most likely a ghoul, had delivered to you earlier by sliding it underneath your door.  The paper has your name on it in beautiful cursive, deep black ink, a green wax seal with a II stamped into it, keeping the contents safe. The note inside is written in a similar fashion, kept very brief and in neat handwriting. All it says is: My quarters, 7pm. Secondo.
Considering you spent most of the night in pure agony, this is a welcome glimmer of hope. He is reaching out and that is what matters, despite all of your doubts and anxieties telling you otherwise, obscuring the joy you should feel at the fact that things are finally moving.
You take the note and press it to your heart, sitting back down on the bed in your tiny quarters. It smells vaguely of his cologne or at least the whimsical part of you wants it to. In any case, he wrote it, thinking about you, maybe even longing for you. Your worries slowly melt at that thought, even though you’re aware you’re in love with the most unattainable man in the whole abbey.
If you had glanced outside the window in that very moment, you would have caught Secondo making his way through the gardens and to the greenhouse – a man on a mission.
He had been pondering all night what he could possible do to make it up to you, to set things right. And there is really only one thing he could think of: Food.
When you made him lunch he promised to return the favour. Another unprecedented lapse. Secondo cooks, he loves to cook, but he does not cook for his dates. It’s too intimate, too personal. His kitchen is sacred, preparing food a form of meditation after a long day. It’s a part of himself he doesn’t share with fleeting encounters.
So when he found himself in a nearby Italian market earlier, carefully choosing the ingredients for a meal, he almost felt lost. He’s bought in bulk before, he’s bought for himself before, but he’s never bought specifically for two. And most unsettlingly, it feels good.
Now, here in Primo’s sanctuary, he has almost made peace with these new developments. 
Almost.
 “Buon pomeriggio, fratello,” he greets the older man. “I am in need of some fresh basil.”
Primo immediately picks up his scissors. “Che fortunato. My basil plants are thriving at the moment.”
Secondo has no doubts about that. The smells inside the greenhouse are rich and aromatic, a sensory reminder of all the summers he spent in the Italian countryside, trying to connect with his roots. As much as he loves big cities with their bustling night lives, clubs and parties, exclusive bars and restaurants… this is home. 
While he’s busy reminiscing, Primo moves to an array of basil plants in the corner, their oval leaves a vivid shade of green. Secondo is pleased with that. They’re going to turn his dish into the most beautiful colours and since his objective for today is that everything has to be perfect, details like that matter.
“�� sufficiente?” Primo asks.
“A bit more. I am cooking for two tonight.”
Primo furrows his brow, cutting some more leaves off the delicate plant. “You have a guest for dinner? Someone special, then?”
Secondo hates that he knows him so well sometimes, but Primo is the only one who was ever even close to a healthy father figure for him. His counsel is the only one he truly values, even though he is rare to seek it out these days. 
All he can do is give a curt nod in reply.
“You’re in love,” Primo states with a smile. “That is a good thing, you know?”
Secondo makes a face. “I feel like I am sick. I don’t know how people do it.”
“It will stop feeling like that at some point,” Primo explains, carefully placing the cut basil in a small basket. “You will grow to appreciate a steady presence by your side, fratello, especially when you reach my age.”
Secondo wants to reply that he doubts it, but it would be a lie to pretend he hasn’t thought about it since getting close to you. You are steady. You are smart and kind and caring, he can talk to you as well as be silent with you. There hasn’t been a single moment in all these months now in which he’s grown tired of you. And yes, that is unprecedented as well.
“Thank you for the basil,” Secondo says.
Primo gives him a gentle, brotherly smile.
✦ ✧ ✦ 
A tentative knock. 
Secondo looks up from the counter and towards the door, his heart rate quickening in a concerning jump. Another knock, more confident this time. He chuckles to himself. You’re nervous but you don’t want him to think that you are – which is exactly how he’s feeling right now.
Before he opens, he wipes his hands on his black slacks, rights the collar of his white shirt, and then there you are. There you are.
And it’s a sight he will never forget. He’s very pleased to see that you dressed up for him. When he kisses your cheek in greeting, he catches your scent and the perfume with its sweet as well as tangy notes perfectly mirrors your character. It takes everything in him to break away again.
“Thank you for following my invitation,” he says, closing the door behind you.
A shy smile. “It sounded more like an order.”
He feels his heart plummeting and for a second there is a shadow of doubt crossing his mind. “Is that the reason you came? Because you felt obligated?”
Your eyes widen and you quickly shake your head. “No. No, I would have come either way, no matter why you want me here.”
Relief. He takes your arm and gently guides you further into the room. “I want you here because I promised to cook for you and I intend to keep that promise.”
“So, this is a dinner date?” 
“Yes.”
“A date date?”
“Yes.”
Your smile is worth it, genuine and so bright that he almost forgets what he’s supposed to do. Your lips are all he can focus on when you’re so close and it’s only when he sees them form an O that he realises he’s been staring. Secondo finally pulls you into the kitchen area and motions for you to sit on a stool at his counter. It’s surreal to see you here, such different surroundings, but it’s a sight he could get used to.
“Is that fresh basil from the greenhouse?” you ask.
Secondo values a professional mise en place, every ingredient neatly laid-out ready to be used which gives you the perfect opportunity to analyse everything he’s going to use. “It is.”
“So you did guess my favourite.”
“I didn’t guess, my dove.” He looks up at you. “You’re not the only one who is observant.”
You smirk and while he’s busy filling a big pot with water to boil the pasta you take in his quarters. Naturally, they are much bigger than yours, the kitchen and living area combined into a spacious room, all dark colours, black and grey, contrasted with a few light grey touches here and there. You notice a lingering smell of incense and what you can only assume is cigar smoke. A small serving cart turned into a bar sits next to an emerald green couch with velvet upholstering. Your eyes are drawn to a carafe filled with a dark ember liquid, sitting right next to a crystal ashtray that reflects the remainders of sunlight streaming in through the arched windows.
Secondo sets the heavy pot down on the stove and the thud makes you turn your head back to him. He’s noticed you drifting off, hoping that you like what you’re seeing, that you wouldn’t mind spending time here more often. His home in the abbey has been crafted very consciously over the past decade, every item carefully curated. He’s toying with the optimal balance between luxurious and still slightly understated, comfortable.
Your face doesn’t betray your opinion but as he turns on the stove, you slip from your stool. He watches you from the corner of his eye as you join him behind the counter and tries not to let you deter him from the task at hand – salting the water, one of many steps. You come to a stop right behind him and then he feels your arms snaking around his waist, squeezing tightly as you press yourself into his back, your cheek right against his shoulder. It’s an unexpectedly tender hug, like you just need to be close to him in any way that you can, and despite your soft affection that he so struggles to accept, he’s immensely relieved to have you closer. 
Secondo lets you hold him for however long you want. He can clearly imagine your squished cheek, your puckered lips, and all he wants is to spin you around and kiss you breathless. But his plan says no physicality until after dinner. He knows he won’t be able to stop once you start touching, and he has a lot to do until then, a lot to say until then. So it’s dinner first, then discussing the necessities, and then he can fuck you.
“My dove, you’re distracting me,” he says, finally adding a generous amount of salt to the water.
“Mhm.” You duck underneath his arm and hug him sideways now, your face melting into his neck. When your nose brushes against his sensitive skin it’s almost enough to make him come undone. A shiver runs down his spine and you give a satisfied hum at his reaction. “Actually, I was wondering… is it allowed to kiss the chef?”
“Ordinarily, it’s not.”
A kiss just below his ear. “And un-ordinarily?”
Fuck his plan. 
He grabs your hips and pulls you flush against him, bringing one gloved hand up to cup your cheek. He stops for a second, taking in the barely visible bruises on your jaw. With the memory of what happened in the storage room clear in his mind, he feels a jolt of lust, and then his mouth is on yours. This time, he’s not as forceful, but it’s not as soft as he would wish either. He can’t help but push his tongue into your mouth at the first opportunity, tasting you and a hint of minty toothpaste. You moan softly, clinging to the front of his shirt until he’s sure he could have spared himself the trouble of ironing it.
He breaks away, staring at your swollen lips, the skin around them all red and wet with spit.
Oh, that mouth.
He’s going to lose his mind over it, slowly but surely, and he can’t help but kiss you again, slower, deeper, exploring every inch of you with his tongue.
When he breaks away this time, you smile and the way it stretches your lips, plumps the apples of your cheeks and brings out that joyful glimmer in your eyes – it feels so personal, so very intimate to him. This kind of smile should belong to him and only him.
“Are you very worried about this?” you ask suddenly, smoothing your hand over his shirt. “About us?”
A deep, long sigh. “I worry, yes. I don’t know if I can give you what you want.”
Your hand slides up his neck, softly cradling his cheek. “All I want is you, Secondo, in any way that I can.”
He smiles at the use of his name, closing his eyes as he leans into your touch. It may well be the first smile in a long time that he doesn’t even attempt to hold back, though he’s not sure if that’s true. He catches himself smiling at the mere thought of you more often than seems healthy. In your presence, his mouth does a lot of things he simply can’t control anymore.
Like kiss you again right now, fiercely, passionately, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth until you start whining. At this point, he doubts he will ever be sated. His need for you is an ever-expanding black hole and he’s teetering at the edge of being consumed himself. But he’s no stranger to uncertainty, to taking risks, as much as he hates the feeling of powerlessness. And so the next time you part, he turns off the stove despite the water almost boiling, and pulls you into his bedroom.
There should have been a conversation at some point tonight that lasted more than that one sentence of reassurance you gave him, an honest exchange of expectations, feelings and hopes, but maybe he doesn’t have to say it.
It’s a knee-jerk response, a very reactionary change of plans: Make love to you (or at least attempt it), eat dinner, then fuck you for the rest of the night.
The bedroom, unsurprisingly, is dominated by a huge four-poster bed, clad in emerald green sheets that give off a sweet scent, only overpowered by the smoky aroma of the incense burning on Secondo’s altar, the light of numerous black candles dipping the room in a warm, flickering light, heavy curtains blocking out the sun completely. 
You stand in front of his bed shivering in anticipation. 
“Two things,” he says, eyes fixated on yours. “First: In here, it is Papa. At least for now.”
You nod. 
“Second: You will tell me immediately if I do anything that you don’t like. No shame, no judgement. You use your words to let me know what you want or do not want. Yes?”
“Yes, Papa.”
He smirks. You learn fast, but he knows that already. Secondo reaches out for your hands, taking both of them in his and bringing them to his lips, gently but insistingly kissing your knuckles. In the dim light, his features look daunting, a stark contrast to his soft mouth. His eyes meet yours, fervently, longingly, and then he drops your hands and pulls you in for a real kiss. This time, knowing he won’t have to hold back anymore, he lets his hands roam free, opening buttons, freeing every inch of your skin with deft, confident fingers, until you’re completely bare in front of him. His mouth doesn’t leave yours even as you gasp for air, sucking and licking on whatever he can reach. Ultimately, he keeps your bottom lip trapped between his teeth to allow you some air, teasing it with his tongue before swallowing your next breath yet again. Meanwhile, his hands explore the outlines of your body, big, curious hands still covered in leather, mapping out every single detail.
Shaky fingers toy with the buttons on his shirt, not managing to open any of them but trailing further down until they find his belt. He allows you to fiddle with the buckle, if only because your warm fingers graze his abdomen with every attempt to open it. When you give up and reach further down, he gently removes your hands and pulls away from the kiss.
You look at him with big eyes, whimpering softly, and he can tell that you’re nervous.
“Relax, my dove,” he says, swiping his thumb over your hot cheek. “All I want is to take care of you. Now, get on the bed.”
You do as he says, so obedient. Secondo removes his belt slowly, watching you stretch out amongst his sheets and pillows. His hand falters at the sight. You’re beautiful, a dream come true, and in that moment he is immensely relieved that he did not give into his impulses before.
With your eyes on him, he removes his shirt and steps out of his pants. He didn’t bother with underwear, so when he joins you on the bed there is nothing separating you anymore. Your skin is hot under his as he crawls between your legs, towering over your shivering form.
He can’t help but kiss you once more, licking into your waiting mouth. Your hand moves to his head, scratching softly, and he hums as he allows his lips to travel to your neck. He finds a deep purple hickey there which shouldn’t come as a surprise to him since he left it there a mere day ago but the sight nevertheless makes him proud. You’re already marked as his and when the night is over, your whole body will be.
Making true on that promise, his lips trail down your body, stamping soft, lingering kisses to your chest, your nipples, licking down to your abdomen where he stays for a moment.
“Hm, così dolce,” he whispers. “So sweet.”
“Papa,” you say.
He looks up. “Yes?”
You buck your hips slightly. “I need… I need more.”
He sits back, intense eyes circling in on you as he removes his gloves, throwing them aside. “Open your mouth, tesoro, show me that sweet tongue.”
You do, poking out your tongue slightly, and he leans back over you, sliding two fingers in between your still swollen lips. You start to suck, swivelling your tongue around his digits and he can feel his cock twitching at the sight and feeling.
“So good for me, my dove,” he whispers. “So good for your Papa.”
You moan around his digits, the vibrations sending a pang of need into his body. When you start to breathe heavily through your nose, he decides that his fingers are wet enough. His hand snakes down your body, collecting more of your arousal, and then he starts working you slowly, carefully. You whimper, demanding more, but for right now he’s not going to hurry. You’re not going to come before he’s inside of you.
He continues for a bit longer until you can feel the arousal flowing through your whole body, building up into waves that make you shiver. His fingers find your waiting hole, spreading out the combination of spit and arousal on his hand and stretching you open bit by bit. His hard cock, already leaking precum, sits hot and heavy against your thigh. Mismatched eyes never leave yours, catching ever flicker of lust and pleasure in your half-lidded eyes, even as the squelching sounds between your legs get louder and you barely manage to hold his gaze anymore.
“Please,” you whisper. “Please, Papa.”
“Please what?” he demands. “Words, tesoro.”
You swallow heavily, chest heaving as your body tries to search for his, but he’s hovering just above you, propped up on one arm, massaging your insides with the other.
“I want you, Papa,” you say. “Please, I need you inside of me, need to f-feel you. Please.”
Secondo could listen to you all day and maybe later he’s going to see just how long he can get you to beg, but right now he’s too impatient, too eager, spurred on by how tight and wet you feel around his fingers. His cock is aching for friction and so he removes his hand, ignoring the disapproving whine you let out.
“Since you ask so nicely,” he says.
Cock in hand, he lines himself up, carefully pushing inside. Your head falls back into the pillows as you let out a drawn-out hum, taking him so well, inch by inch, and he feels a flutter inside of his chest at the sight. Your legs wrap around his back, heels digging into his ass, and he lets his chest sink onto yours, waiting for you to relax, to adjust. Pressed together like that, a searing wave of emotion overcomes him, deep, warm, an intense longing to never let go that is utterly unfamiliar to him. He has to unload the sudden tension in a heated kiss, feeling your moans and whimpers reverberating inside of him as he slowly starts moving.
He tries to make it last, to keep up a careful, deliberate rhythm. He really, really tries, biting his lip to hold back, but he soon has to go faster to stay sane. More desperate noises from you as his thrusts get harder and weeks of held-back need for you spill out from inside of him. Attaching his lips to the still unmarked side of your soft neck, he starts sucking, biting, trying to absorb you into him. You keen, one hand on his neck, the other tightly grabbing his shoulder for support. With a pop, he removes his mouth to take a deep breath and your expression is hazy, eyes clouded with lust. He shifts his weight onto one arm, angling your hips up slightly and you clench around him over and over again at the changed angle, crying out softly at every roll of his hips. He feels himself getting close and to his relief he can tell you’re getting there too, trembling underneath him more and more.
“Please,” you say, strangled, whimpery. “Please, Papa, I n-need to– need to come.”
He growls, bringing his hand between your bodies to help you over the edge. It’s strenuous, his arm protesting wildly, but when he feels your sticky arousal on his fingers, it’s enough to keep him going.
“Come for me,” he says. “Come on my cock, tesoro. You’ve been so good for your Papa.”
It’s all you need, two more thrusts and a few words of praise, and you tighten around him, crying out as your whole body shudders. He gives a few more laborious thrusts to draw out your pleasure before he finally changes the angle, taking the weight off his arm until he can pound into you harder, chasing his own release. His hips snap against yours, loud obscene sounds, and you whimper in overstimulation, arms wrapping around him gently as he stills. A low moan leaves his burning throat and he spills inside of you, filling you up with his seed. His hips stutter a few more times before he rolls onto his side, dragging you with him.
Heavy, panting breaths fills the sudden silence of the room. Secondo pulls you close and you settle against his chest, breathing kisses to his sweaty skin, softly licking up the column of his throat. He only hums and for a long time, you stay like this, tangled up in silky sheets and the comfort of each other. His hold on you is so tight that you don’t, not even for a second, doubt whether he meant everything that just happened, all the things he can’t bring himself to tell you yet but that you can feel so clearly even in his silence – and for now, that’s enough.
“You sabotaged my dinner plans,” he finally whispers, breathing more slowly now. “I didn’t even get to open the wine.”
You chuckle against his neck. “Would you like me to help you preparing it now?”
Secondo sighs deeply, pulling you closer. “No, my dove, give your Papa a few more minutes of this, yes?”
By the way you can feel him twitching against your belly, you highly doubt that it’s only going to be a few more minutes. He knows this too, his plans long abandoned, and when you prop yourself up to look at him, eyes full of reverent love for an old man like him, he starts to embrace all of the changes you bring into his life. Maybe Terzo was right after all, maybe it’s never too late, not even for someone like him.
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Thank you for reading! I know this was very long but believe me, writing it was a pain too :D I hope you enjoyed it – kudos, comments, rbs etc are as always very appreciated ♡
Masterlist – my Ao3
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fox-guardian · 2 years ago
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time for some assorted stoker swap au excerpts in no particular order because i need to share this thing in some capacity so bad. i might've shared some of these before but i Don't Care it's been months anyway
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[ID: A series of snippets of a google doc in dark mode.
"Bone app-the-tea,"
After much hesitation involving pacing his room and making jokingly threatening faces and gestures at the screen and quoting vines at it to calm his nerves, he finally pressed the apply button with a yelp.
Two hours and one dramatic reading of some awful werewolf fiction later,
He was surprised. He was delighted. He was very likely fucked.
Danny looked up at him guiltily with the bucket of popcorn resting on his stomach. ".... I have good news and bad news." Tim's face fell as he straightened up. "What have you done?" "Good news and arguably bad news, depending on your personal thoughts on it," he elaborated, standing up, still holding his popcorn. "I repeat," Tim said, pressing his palms together and pointing at him, "what have you done?"
"Either way, I can't imagine the whole staff is wearing corsets and hoop skirts." ".... That'd be pretty cool though." "It would be, actually."
A resting bitch face is all it was, that's alright. He lived with a guy with a resting bitch face, this was fine.
Danny thought for a moment. "I.... have a background in urban exploration. Would that be useful?" Jon and Sasha looked at each other, and then looked at him. "That would be very useful," Jon said, with an air of curiosity to his tone. "Very, very useful," Sasha added, grinning mischievously. "Hey, he's my partner now," Jon said, jabbing a finger at her. "I get to go out in the field with him first."
"Sounds like I didn't die in Artefact Storage," Sasha replied.
"I'm an adult," Danny said, sipping from his novelty beehive mug.
Next thing he knew his back was hurting and he was upside down on the floor
".... Danny, did you-" "I might've gotten some light carbon monoxide poisoning in the attic." "Danny!" Tim sat upright, setting his mug down.
"Then fuck 'em,"
"Then, I repeat, fuck 'em."
"You all deserve it~" Danny said, blending his natural nerves into the false face of a fidgety fanatic.
"Yeah.... " Danny says, forever changed.
Danny tried to dream up as much mental eyebleach as possible. Kitty cats and puppy doges and bees half stuck in flowers, kitty cats and puppy dogs and bees half stuck in flowers. This was going to be fun to tell Tim about tonight.
end ID]
~~~~
also the current working titles for the chapters i have so far!
1 - some wednesday night in august 2013 2 - how to ace a job interview 3 - *spongebob voice* IM READY IM READY 4 - field work 5 - another day another dollar 6 - stakeout!
this update isn't much but i thought it'd be fun to share some stuff out of context :) and hopefully it motivates me to write even more lol
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murderandcoffee · 1 year ago
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Wingmen au where Martin straight up asks Jon out and Jon gets so flustered he tells Martin to get out of the archive
I hope you're okay with me writing a little scene based off of this because it has been rattling around in my head all day!
Jon was sitting at his desk with his head in his hands when the knock came at the door. He groaned, lifted his head, and intoned, "Come in."
The door swung open to reveal Martin.
Jon sighed. He'd thought his assistants had all left already. Apparently, he was wrong. He waved his hand in a "get on with it" sort of gesture. "Yes, Martin, what do you want? If it's about Ms. Vasquez's statement, I asked Sasha to look into the--"
"Uh, no," Martin interrupted, "it's not about that."
Jon frowned. "Well, then what is it? It's 5:15, why are you still here?"
Martin leaned against the door frame and, for a long moment, stared at Jon. Jon stared back.
"Well?" he prompted.
"Do you want to get dinner?" Martin asked.
Jon waited for additional information. Martin gave no additional information.
Jon narrowed his eyes, suspicion already bubbling up inside of him. "Why? What did you do?" Obviously Martin was trying to soften an incoming blow. Had he misfiled a statement? Contacted the wrong person? Broken something in artefact storage? "You didn't let another dog in, did you?"
"No!" Martin waved his hands. "No. No dog. And I didn't do anything." In a softer voice, he said, "I'd just like to buy you dinner."
If Jon had been holding a pencil, he'd have snapped it in half. "What?"
"I said," said Martin, sounding half-nervous, half-exasperated, "that I'd like to buy you dinner. Any place you wanna go. In fact, I know this wonderful little Greek place a few blocks up. Best souvlaki you could ask for off the continent, and the ambience--"
"Get out."
Martin blinked. Frowned. Blinked again. "What?"
"Get," Jon repeated, "out."
Martin took a step forward. "Why--"
Jon stood so fast his chair toppled over behind him. "Get out!" He pointed at the door. He could feel his face burning, and the awareness of it only made the burning worse. When Martin did not move, Jon shouted, "Get out of my archive!"
Lips pressed tightly together, Martin gave him a single nod and fled.
Jon fell forward, bracing himself against his desk with both arms. He let out a shuddering breath.
I am going to have to speak with Elias about my assistants' penchant for playing pranks. This has gone too far.
He waited until he was sure Martin was out of the building before packing his things and slipping out the door.
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hoeswater · 9 months ago
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I'm Talking about MagPod and Archives Again
I know that those of us in the middle of the Venn diagram of “Magnus fans” and “People who actually know how archives work” have really given Jonny a hard time about the way that the Magnus Institute archives and artefact storage are shown as working (or, I mean, not working) in the podcast. Not just in terms of best practices (where) but also like… archives can be spooky, it can be a spooky job, but not really for those reasons, you know? Anyway, I think that Protocols Episode 9 actually engages with the archives’ role as an archives in a way that’s really, really interesting. Qualifications: I’m almost done with my master’s in Library and Information Science/Archives Management and have been working in actual archives of various types for a year and a half. 
Specifically, I’m really interested in how Dice Guy engages with the horror within the context of the donation process. We hear a lot about the horror that objects in this universe cause while they’re still in the possession of their pre-Institute owners-slash-avatars, and a lot about the horror that these objects cause when they’re mishandled (looking at you, Jon “It is Remarkably Easy to Buy An Axe in Central London” Sims) while being stored at the Institute, and every now and again we get to see Jon or Gertrude accept or turn down an offered object (the teeth apple, Eric Delano’s page, etc) in TMA. But this is one of the only places in the podcast(s) where the process of donation and acquisition registers as a part of the horror story for the people giving or receiving the object. I’m thinking specifically about the beginning of the “statement proper,” where the statement giver says:
“So yeah, I tell you all about them, how I got them, all that crap and you just… You take them away, right? You accept them. Good. I think. I’m pretty sure that’s how it works. It’s how it worked for me, at least. Put them in whatever vault you like, bury them, drop them in the ocean for all I care. All that matters is that they’re yours now.” 
At surface level, this disclaimer seems pretty similar to some of the other things that statement givers say in TMA: I just need to tell someone, I just need somebody else to know, You have the power to do something about this and I don’t, etc. But this statement differs from the ones we saw in TMA because it’s not just about catharsis or reaction to a terrible thing happening; it’s the actual change of ownership of the dice that gives this moment meaning within the horror story for Dice Guy. And this hinges on the fact that Dice Guy, like a lot of real-life people, sees the purpose of an archives as being locked vaults designed to keep non-expert people away from things they don’t know how to handle, rather than their actual purpose, which is to preserve things for the express purpose of making them accessible to the public. I imagine that the Magnus Institute, if it were real, would have some pretty strict access policies due to, you know, special circumstances– the stuff it holds generally having the ability to kill or maim or otherwise make people’s lives miserable– but it’s fun to think about. If Dice Guy had understood the fact that archivists and staff and conservationists and sometimes researchers interact* with the materials in their care, would he have still donated the dice? Was he at the point where it didn’t matter who got the bad luck, as long as it wasn’t him, or was he leaning on the stereotype of archives being locked vaults as a way to absolve himself of the guilt of giving the dice away to a person, because people use the things they're given and he thinks archives don't? 
It also raises some interesting questions about ownership. Real archivists think about the ethics of donation, acquisition, and ownership a lot. What does it mean for somebody to give something to an archive? What does it mean to accept it, therefore a) accepting responsibility for the preservation of the object and b) assigning cultural/historical/ideological value to it? This is where TMAGP comes pretty close to real archival theory: Dice Guy thinks that he’s nullifying the dice’s power by giving them to the Institute, but isn’t it true that to accept an object into an archive assigns it a level of power? The notes at the beginning of the statement seem to suggest that the dice coming under the Institute’s ownership lends them power beyond what they had originally, as well: “Viability as Subject,” “Viability as agent,” “Viability as catalyst,” “Recommend referral to Catalytics for Enrichment Applicability Assessment.” To me, this says that maybe the dice were in the running to potentially be chosen for the role that the tape recorders fill in TMA– to facilitate, or serve as a catalyst for, the narrative/the fears’ growing power by being passed to the “agent” (Jon or Jon-equivalent) through the Magnus Institute. We, the audience, know that, if the dice had been selected to fill the tape recorder role, that would give them the potential not just to make one individual’s life more miserable, but to fundamentally change the entire world a la TMA 160 and 200. 
*In TMA canon, the Web uses the Magnus Institute as a site for agents and catalysts to interact, just as much as the Eye does if not more. The fact that the archives is a site of interaction between people and particular objects is critical to the narrative as told by the Web, even if it seems incidental to Jon–and even if Jon doesn’t understand the archives that way. It’s an interesting way to look at the Magnus Institute and archives as functioning in a similar way to actual archives, which serve as sites of interaction between people and historical objects (in spite of Jon’s complete lack of ability to function as a regular archivist.)
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howboutsleep · 10 months ago
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everyone is saying redcanary's gore image that got deleted is them being covered in eyes or whatever.
im convinced that whatever killed redcanary was not eye aligned
first and foremost. when you see a person/corpse with additional eyes growing out of their body, you dont just go uhm mods this gore is disturbing my tea time please delete it immediately. cause that is no ordinary gore
another popular interpretation i saw was that the posted image was redcanary with their eyes gouged out. sure. whatever. thats ordinary gore. mundane and normal. but then, why would anything eye-aligned, that sees through eyes, do that? yeah sure poked out eyes creepy yada yada but jt just doesnt make sense.
now think about the box redcanary found. this is so from artefact storage. but hey, wasnt there a fire in the institute. and from tma, most entities' artefacts (and avatars (love you nikola you were probably the funniest molten plastic spill in existence)) are easily destroyed in fire.
except for ones belonging to the desolation.
so yeah. redcanary so posted half life 2 Corpse01.mdl inspiration on sfw subreddit. hope they get unbanned
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a-mag-a-day · 2 years ago
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Another Real Historical People statement! It's not actually known who operated the Mechanical Turk during its original tour, but Abraham Janssen was one of the best chess players in the world at one time, so he'd certainly have been a good choice.
Love the description of the Unknowing, as well as the clarity of the Slaughter Squad in contrast to it. The Slaughter certainly does have a directness of approach.
Martin: How dare you leave me behind?! I am shocked! Shocked, I say! 😉
I hope the B&B was nice, at least.
"That axe of yours" is hilarious to me, because this is the first time it's been mentioned since Jon presumably dropped it in Artefact Storage after destroying the Web table (otherwise we'd have ended up with Brutal Axe Murder). I can only imagine that Artefact Storage just... kept it there, because they don't let an object of unknown provenance leave without studying it first. Two and a half months later, Jon shows up in absolutely disastrous condition and is like "Yeah, um... that's mine?" (Sonja: "EXPLAIN. 😡") After which I guess it's just been in his office? Visibly enough that it is well known that it's there? Leaning against the side of his desk or something...
Axe has become a recurring character in a way the pipe never managed
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kitkatyes · 8 months ago
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I can’t sleep so here’s my thoughts on a hypothetical tma ieytd au
Something, something major tma + minor ieytd 3 spoilers
I really like the thought of Phoenix being in artefact storage. But, like, they’re more into the artefact retrieval aspect of it. I can just imagine Phoenix breaking into someplace with half an earbud in plugged into some mobile phone from who-knows-when with their handler rattling on about what they need to get
I’m tossing up weather Zor or Morales should be the head of the institute. They both make sense, I think. Both are the big bosses of their companies, after all. Wait… what if it’s a Jonah situation: it’s Morales’ body but Zor’s mind??? I feel like such a genius (it is 2am, I am exhausted from my schools production and I’m letting my brain run wild)
Okay, whoever is the Elias stand-in would Know that Phoenix is an avatar of the End (their uncanny ability to escape death etc.) and thus, keeps sending them to get all the artefacts: it is quite annoying to replace staff that have been devoured via homophobic vases and other such artefacts, after all. Their handler is none the wiser to the
Juniper would definitely try and do the Unknowing and Phoenix has definitely confiscated at least one of his masks over the years
HOLY SHIT WHAT ID THE HANDLER WAS LIKE SASHA AND GOT FUCKING SNATCHED KDNFVKJHFD
I AM CONNECTING THR DOTS— THINKING OF OPERATION SAFE AND SOUND WHERE JUNIPER STEALS HIS VOICE WHAT IF HE JUST STEALS HIS BEING???
PHOENIX DOESNT NOTICE BUT PRISM DOES AND THEN THEY REALISE
I love Phoenix so much (giving them immense trauma)
What if after that, they get ‘promoted’ to the archives branch— either as archival assistant or The Archivist
“I understand that your coworker was forcibly replaced by some weird creature but here, do paperwork instead of running around like a lunatic; I promise it’ll make you feel better”
Worm incident but it’s bees. I don’t think I need to explain who this is
Im gonna go pass out now bc i desperately need sleep, gn
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tmagrp-aita-confessions · 5 months ago
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WIBTA if I didn't give a statement to the Institute about the Leitner my collective read?
Right, so, I(?M) am part of a plural system (collectively early 20s, M) of 13 individuals that works at the Magnus Institute—specifically artefact storage. We just processed a Leitner for storage, having read the statement attached. The thing is, uh...
...we've read that Leitner, or skimmed it, at least. And it was fine for us. Beneficial, even! I don't want to be too specific about it, because that's very personal details, but frankly we're better than ever these days. And yet the statement that came with the Leitner... the person that read it turned into a half-real sort of spirit-thing.
I have... theories as go why. And I want to test them. But we'd almost certainly have the book taken out of our reach if we confessed to having had contact with it before, and that's... well. Not conducive to my goals.
For the record, my headmates don't think we should give a statement, but they also really do not want me to test my theories either.
So. WIBTA?
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inklingofadream · 1 year ago
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Probably very long ramble about age, job experience, etc for the OG Archives gang (teen jon au ppl get tentatively excited)
Martin's birth year is pretty solidly 1987, because when he says he's 29 we have a semi-solid date for that; Jon is roughly the same, because he claims to be turning 38 in the birthday tape, in 2015 or '16, adding 10 to either his new or former age (as Sasha died in July 2016, but we don't know when exactly Jon's birthday is [unless you are a Jonny Sims just gave Jon his own birthday and never changed it as Jon became a v separate character, in which case Jon's birthday would be November 3, 1988]). Assuming a Bachelor's degree and on-time graduation, he would have graduated in 2009. He started at the Institute in 2011, and may or may not have had an office job in the two years in between. Or maybe he graduated late to make my life easier!
Martin left school to work full-time when he was 17, eventually landing his job at the Institute. Given that the search took long enough for him to decide he wouldn't be able to get the kind of money he needed on the back of his real CV, I would guess that he had some prior work experience, part-time stuff possibly dating back to before he quit school and similar stuff in between dropping out and getting hired at the Institute. He was working at the Institute in 2009, when he would have been 22, meaning a maximum of 9 years of other work experience. Realistically, I don't know that his mother's health was pressing enough for him to have started working at 13, but 15, when there would be fewer restrictions (and also because very few 13 year olds can pass for older, at least consistently). He had to get desperate enough to work up to lies as big as a master's in parapsychology (I'd assume he tried to pass with a Bachelor's of whatever first? Or maybe he was just tailoring his fake credentials to the posting's minimum requirements). Regardless, my assumption would be that he had a couple years of experience in customer service roles of various description.
Tim has a Bachelor's degree and was in publishing in 5 years before Danny died. Assuming 4 years to finish his degree (and he graduated with the highest honors possible, thank you Wikipedia page about UK degree classification) and the publishing job being his first job after graduation, he would be 31 in 2013, for a birth year of 1982, five or six years older than Jon and Martin and the only one of the four we know for certain has experience with a non-Institute office job.
Sasha is an information void (😭). She worked in Artefact Storage for 3 months, spent an unknown amount of time in Research, and transferred to the Archives with Jon. My inclination is to put her a bit older than Jon and Martin, but not more than a few years older than Tim. Call it 30 to 35 at the start of the show. We can guess at prior experience based on her behavior, but I don't know that that's a great indicator. Publishing is a pretty tough industry, and Tim was still the driving force of the wine in the middle of the workday, with both his bosses thing at the birthday party. I think even before things go bad the Institute is just on the casual side of things. For my purposes, I'm considering the Institute Sasha's primary professional experience.
By which I mean, someone else should benefit from the hour and a half I spent researching this unanswerable question
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researchercase · 6 months ago
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Thought I should post this here. I recorded it a while ago but i guess it'd be useful for others to hear it?
(OOC: ignore logic for this and imagine that somehow the tape recording can be posted on tumblr)
[CLICK]
CASEY Honestly not sure why I'm doing this, but if it worked for Erika, I guess it'll work for me.
Statement of Casey Ross, regarding my time in the Coffin, an Artefact of the Buried. Statement given directly from subject, 16th May, 2024.
Statement begins I guess.
[Pause]
[Sigh]
CASEY [Statement] I don't even know why I'm trying this, I'm not like the Archivist, not like Styx. I can't even go down to the Archives anymore without freezing up when I reach the elevator, I had to get someone else to get this tape recorder for me.
Feels like an ironic joke. 'Oh the Workaholic claustrophobe got buried alive and now can't even go down to a basement in their own workplace'.
[Another Pause]
I don't even know how it happened, how I got in. Well, I do but… it just happened so fast. It was January 5th, a Friday, end of the week. I was supposed to get dropped off at my flat by Kieran but he was sick that day and since no one else could give me a ride I decided to walk home. I don't live far from the Institute, just a 30 minute walk on a good day.
It was around 6pm I recall, since it was January it got darker earlier in the day, and I'd been walking for 10 minutes at that point, posting on my blog and about the cross the pavement when a van parked in front.
I was a bit peeved that day so this was just another inconvenience to annoy me, I guess my brain didn't catch up when I saw the name on the side of the Van, 'Breekon & Hope'. I moved to walk past it, along the door when suddenly, it opened. I had to back up in time as it did so, more pissed off at the Drivers who almost hit me with the door.
Then, I saw it. A coffin with chains on it. I didn't need to see what was etched on it to know what it was. It was too late for me anyways.
The coffin opened, and I went in. Other statements talked about the compelling aspect that lures victims into the coffin, and that's what happened to me. The thing is, the whole time my mind was there, it was just my body that moved without me doing anything. I remember the anxiety and fear I felt as I went down and down into it, before the lid closed.
It's difficult to remember exactly what happened for the month I spent in there, just constant anxiety attacks as I was crushed more and more by the earth, yet kept alive. I will say it certainly felt longer than a month, at a point you just loose count of the days, especially when you can't keep count on anything in there, or see the sun rise and fall.
I suppose when the Coffin was put into the Institute is when I felt something different. Like a tug of a string that I couldn't find, but it was there and I could feel it. Apparently a way to get out of the coffin is with a tether, a connection to something or someone, a strong one at that. Just can't believe that tether was my workplace.
It certainly wasn't strong enough to pull me out itself so I decided to dig. Digging is was got me out of a Buried manifestation when I was younger so it was worth a shot to try.
It did work. The closer I got to the lid, the more that tether tugged.
I was physically weak at the point I reached the entrance but I managed to lift it open and climb out. A few minutes later, I was found by one of the workers in Artefact Storage and an ambulance was called. Got my phone back though, since Kieran found it and it was kept at Lost and Found.
I was in hospital for around a week and a half, and went to physical therapy for a few weeks after, just to make sure I could move properly after having not been able to for a month.
After that is just me getting back to work, catching up with Kieran, finding out what happened while I was gone, and so on. Only lingering effect the coffin left was extreme claustrophobia and occasional pain in my legs and joints, which is why I have a cane now and a emotional support animal, Goose, who's my dog.
I guess it doesn't help that a Buried avatar is now working at the Institute as a researcher but it surprisingly doesn't bother me that much? I actually kind of like the rain.
CASEY [Exhale]
Uh.. statement ends I guess.
[Pause]
I need some rest.
[CLICK]
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the-spooky-archives · 1 year ago
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Good morning to everyone with a better sleep schedule than I
My name is Jasper Creed, I’m the head of artefact storage at the Magnus Institute. My job is identifying evil tables, evil books, and less evil taxidermy.
There’s not much going on but my half professional half personal blog is @thatsalotofstaplesdude
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feinstone · 1 year ago
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After about an hour and a half of searching, I found the source!
The name "Olmec Penis Man" seems to have originated from this instagram post sharing the image, which was in turn based off the description of this post.
Neither stated the source for the image and the objects, beyond the original post saying it was part of "temporary exposition in the USA."
Based on the composition and quality of the photograph, I figured it most likely was either part of a museum collection, or was at some point listed for sale at an auction. When you take photos like these to make an object look good, you're either bragging about having it, or trying to convince someone to buy it.
The inclusion of text on the first image saying "Patrimonio de Mexico" made me think that this was likely an object that had either been repatriated or been the subject of repatriation requests by Mexican officials, so I started by searching Mexican museums that may have had it in their collections, as well as other museums around the world with large pre-Columbian collections that may have owned it.
Photos of that quality of an object in a museum collection usually means that it was recently added to their online gallery, often as a result of being pulled out of storage and displayed for a themed exhibition, but after trawling through a dozen museums catalogues, I had no luck. While I found plenty of objects of a similar style, I couldn't find any objects matching this exact image, nor could I find any collections with photos of this kind of composition. Typically these photos would be taken in bulk, and there would be a dozen or so other items in the collection with the same lighting and photographic style, but I couldn't find anything in the places I looked.
But, while searching through more potential sources, I came across this post on a website that had the exact same image, and stated that the piece was formerly part of Guy Joussemet private collection.
This lead me to find this article, which stated that a large portion of the pre-Columbian artefacts from Guy Joussemet's private collection had been incorporated into the Barbier-Mueller collection, which went up for auction through Sotheby's in March of 2013.
Damn. Should have started with auctions. Would have saved me like 45 minutes of scrolling through museum collections.
I searched through the Sotheby's auction results history to find objects from the Barbier-Mueller collection, and lo and behold:
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I found this page on Sotheby's site that shows what appears to be the same object, and provides a little more details on it's history and provenance (or lack thereof, as it were).
The page obviously doesn't refer to it as Olmec Penis Man, but it does call it "Statuette anthropomorphe à tête phallique." Google translate assures me that this is French for "Anthropomorphic statue with a phallic head", which I think is as close to Olmec Penis Man as you'll get in a professional setting.
Anyway, while searching for more information regarding the piece and the collection, I discovered that this auction was a bit of a disaster. Would it shock you to learn that an auction house commissioned to sell a massive private collection of pre-Columbian artifacts didn't put a huge amount of effort into verifying the provenance and authenticity of the pieces they would be selling for a truckload of cash?
According to these two articles, and many more across the internet, the auction was a disaster. A large number of the pieces for sale did not find buyers, and a buuuuunch of countries from which the objects were, uh, """"obtained"""" requested that the auction be halted to allow them to go over the pieces before they were sold. The government agencies making these requests have said that a lot of the pieces seemed to be forgeries, and most of the ones that weren't are heritage items that need to be repatriated to their rightful owners, and any sale of those items would violate several international legislative protections that prohibit their import and sale to private owners.
Sotheby's ignored this and went ahead with the auction anyway. While the sales were affected by the requests and accusations of forgery, it seems they still managed to sell a lot of the collection.
I don't know if this little dude ended up being sold, or if it was indeed repatriated to the country it was looted from, but I at least found some details proving that it does in fact exist, and that it's name basically is "Penis Man."
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Olmec Penis Man, Mexico, 800-1200 BCE
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ispravahomes · 5 months ago
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Isprava turns 6
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Six things you did not know about Isprava homes
As Isprava turns six, we take you through the six things you could not possibly know about Isprava homes.
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It has been six years! Six years filled with dreams, hope and hard work. At Isprava, we have always aimed at making our homes stand a cut above. We do this by constantly focusing on the tinier details in all that we do. This is us spilling the beans on six things you did not know about Isprava homes:
1) At nearly every Isprava home, you will find striking antiques and artefacts that we source from different corners of the world.
2) All of our homes have deep ties with nature. From villas that dip and curve with the shape of the hills they are located at, to spaces that invite the beauty of nature to spill indoors, Isprava homes is where nature unites with man.
3) Isprava’s gorgeous Gleneagle Estate, Kotagiri, features bay windows in every bedroom, just so that you can enjoy a dreamy moment spent taking in the lush greens.
4) We understand the importance of water conservation. Hence, we have incorporated water harvesting in our homes. Through this, we collect, store and reuse water more efficiently.
5) Our expert concierge service can arrange for everything, from personal chefs and indulgent massages to yacht rides and extra pool toys for the kids.
6) All our homes feature customised floor tiles to blend in with the aesthetics of the space. That’s the Isprava promise – flawless attention to detail.
Six of Isprava’s favourite space enhancing secrets
Think you can’t jazz up a smaller space? Think again. We at Isprava, are giving you the inside scoop on six super smooth ways in which you can enhance smaller spaces.
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Whether its cozy bedrooms or compact kitchens, there are many ways by which you can make such spaces appear larger. We are letting you in on six of our secret hacks.
1) Choose a solid colour palette
While you may feel the urge to go all out and splash gorgeous colours on the walls, we suggest opting for a unified colour theme. Softer shades like shell pink or ivory reduce visual disturbances and create the impression of a cleaner, brighter and wider space.
2) Glass should be your go-to
Glass or mirrored accents work wonders in making a room feel larger than it is. This is due to the glass or mirror’s reflective properties. Mount mirrors on the walls or bring in glass-topped tables to create the illusion of a larger space.
3) Windows are wonderful
When a room is flooded with natural light, it seems to look more spacious. Regardless of whether the room is done up in darker shades or a more neutral palette, light lifts up the space instantly. So, tone down any window treatments that obstruct light and add in as many windows as you can.
4) Functional furniture
When you go furniture shopping, look for pieces that double up as storage units. That way, you are saving up on storage space and leaving behind more room to breathe. Think folding tables, Murphy beds and stowaway stools.
5) Don’t be walled in
Walls obstruct light and take up space. Consider ‘door-less’ doorways or half-walls, which can be used to mount a television screen or quirky picture frames.
6) Befriend large format tiles
Watch a tiny space magically seem larger with the installation of large format tiles. Whether it is floor tiles or wall tiles, larger ones not only add depth to a room but also make the space look cleaner and more impactful once you enter. Visit Isprava to read more.
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govindhtech · 6 months ago
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VESSL AI Takes MLOps to New Heights with Google Cloud
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Even while AI has the ability to provide competitive advantages, it is still difficult to realise its business worth. It is still difficult for organisations to advance AI initiatives beyond trial; estimates from the past few years suggest that over half of machine learning (ML) pilots do not make it to production.
ML systems have a tonne of unreported technical debt. Just a small portion of the processes, parts, and infrastructure needed to implement ML systems in the actual world are represented by ML code. In order to satisfy the growing needs of AI-driven businesses, today’s machine learning (ML) teams must improve their ML operations through streamlined, effective workflows.
With the goal of bridging the gap between proof-of-concept and production, VESSL AI offers comprehensive tools, fully managed infrastructure, and an innovative end-to-end MLOps platform. Google cloud are committed to helping organisations grow and accelerate their AI initiatives.
Google Cloud: The impetus for VESSL AI’s development
VESSL AI selected Google Cloud as their partner because VESSL AI saw early on the revolutionary potential of cloud computing and services to improve their MLOps platform.
VESSL AI ability to deploy solutions smoothly is made possible by Google Cloud’s enormous resources, which guarantees that their customers can continue operating and grow as needed. VESSL AI offer an architecture that scales in accordance with model requirements by utilising Google Cloud services, including Compute Engine and Google Kubernetes Engine (GKE), so that customers may make the best use of their resources. Because of Google Cloud’s vast network and infrastructure, VESSL AI are also able to provide their solutions to businesses all over the world.
For instance, constructing a reliable infrastructure that could quickly source a variety of GPUs for executing large language models (LLMs) and generative AI models presented a problem to many generative AI firms, including their own. As a result, VESSL AI developed VESSL Run, a single interface that can run different kinds of machine learning workloads on different GPU setups. They built resilient computing clusters with GKE so we can scale ML workloads on Kubernetes dynamically. With this configuration, They can oversee the whole machine learning lifecycle, from training to deployment. Furthermore, Spot GPUs guarantee that their platform can reach maximum computing efficiency, cutting expenses dramatically without compromising functionality.
Since data is the primary commercial asset of AI teams and organisations, data security is equally crucial. VESSL AI can reassure their users with confidence that they adhere to the strictest standards and criteria thanks to Google Cloud’s stringent security and compliance measures. For example, VESSL AI Artefacts uses fine-grained access control on Google Cloud to safely store models, datasets, and other important artefacts. To guarantee that teams can always access their data and workloads, VESSL AI use Filestore for NFS and Cloud Storage for all of their ML datasets and models. Because of this, They are able to guarantee that the data is accurate, consistent, safe, and secure in addition to being available for the whole machine learning lifecycle.Image credit to Google Cloud
Using (ever more) powerful AI
To greatly improve VESSL AI capabilities, They have just implemented integration with Vertex AI. They can now enhance their current MLOps components with Vertex AI, enabling customers to leverage robust models and AutoML solutions from Google in addition to labelling datasets and training models with less manual intervention and expertise. With this connection, VESSL AI can now provide their clients with a more complete and effective solution that better meets the changing demands of AI model development. They can now enhance their current MLOps components with Vertex AI, enabling customers to train models and label datasets with less manual labour and skill, leading to even more efficient machine learning workflows.
By utilising the power of VESSL AI platform, numerous organisations are already reaping transformative benefits that save them money and time. Teams can now create AI models up to four times faster thanks to Google Cloud’s VESSL AI, which has saved hundreds of hours from ideation to deployment. Furthermore, and enabled them to achieve up to 80% savings on cloud expenses.
Furthermore, being able to collaborate closely with Google Cloud’s team of professionals has allowed them to fully grasp everything that Google Cloud has to offer and build a mutually beneficial partnership.
Considering the future
Even though VESSL AI has already had a major impact on the MLOps scene, They are still early in the process. VESSL AI is currently preparing for a future where ML teams can easily expand their ML processes from training to model deployment by integrating several third-party cloud platforms and building on their strong enterprise success stories, culminating in the release of VESSL AI‘s public beta in 2023.
Furthermore, being a part of the Google for Startups Accelerator programme offers them a unique chance to expand their perspectives. This course gives entrepreneurs access to a wealth of resources, including potential investments and mentorship. It works as a catalyst to assist entrepreneurs in growing quickly, entering international markets, and improving their products. This creates opportunities for collaboration with other top players in the sector and creates a strong environment for them to flourish in.
Industries are being revolutionised by the combination of AI and operations. VESSL AI think that working with Google Cloud will help them stay at the vanguard of this change and, ideally, serve as a model for other businesses hoping to use the cloud to speed growth in the emerging field of generative AI. Innovation partners with Google Cloud have access to state-of-the-art technology as well as a network that may greatly expand the scope and potential of their company research.
Read more on govindhtech.com
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