#haley speaks

[haley-harrison]

The best thing about dating a beautician is the ... Makeup sex.

[illarios]

just saw someone modded it so u can have illario's model replace lucanis...........truly i live in console player hell 😭😭😭

[treatyofversigh]

anyone else think the new discord desktop update is awful

[lena-thinks-too-much]

It is so, so important to me that people understand that Tim didn't figure out the bats because Dick was a "Show off". Like yes, Dick Grayson is the most flamboyant, dramatic ass man you will ever meet.

But the quadruple somersault? There's no way that was because dick was just showing off. Because you're telling me Bruce Wayne, who's so committed to hiding his identity that he literally acts like a completely different person out of the mask in public just to ward suspicion, would miss the fact that Robin regularly uses the flying Grayson's trademark move? There's literally no way.

In the comics we see Tim explain his deductive process to Dick and Alfred and they're both surprised impressed whatever. We don't see him explain it to Bruce. I think Bruce would be surprised and shocked that a 9 year old was able to put the pieces together but I don't think he'd be surprised that the quadruple somersault gave it away.

So if Bruce was possibly aware of such an obvious give away, why let it continue?

I'll tell you why.

It really comes down to the physics

So Dick was 9 when he started out right? That means the most he'd have likely weighed was 43kgs or roughly 95lbs in freedom units.

But Dick and both of his parents are gymnasts who tend to be smaller. So he was likely less than that.

In physics, rotating objects build up angular momentum (this is how bikes stay up right for example). The more rotation, the more momentum. And objects with less mass build up that momentum much faster than those that are heavier.

Robin constantly has to fight people who are nearly 3 times his size. I teach 8 year olds, they're tiny. A quadruple somersault for a small boy that weighs less than a hundred pounds is a brutal weapon. Especially if you add in the acceleration from gravity as he drops in from above.

And I can guarantee you this logic tracks because Dick literally utilizes this idea, without the somersault, in the 2009 teen titans cartoon.

Yeah, that's right. We're talking about the infamous knee drop.

Like it is borderline savage. Add in a quadruple somersault and the resulting force is nearly fatal. It's likely the main reason Batman would ever allow him to do it with the cape on.

Also, Dick landing feet first on the penguin in the first image probably gave the guy severe back issues

[a-mortal-turned-god]

{open starter} what is that?

*toy walked into the forge and saw Haley as she mumbled something under her breath*

This should be it

*just as she let it go off of her leg it started scurrying around the forge*

Nope nope

*she says as she chase them*

What do you do?

(tags @acezinspace @emdabitchass @urbestestwindgod @cloak-of-ares @least-favorite-hades-kid @penelope-is-waiting @odysseus-of-ithaca-is-lost @aura-of-the-winds @lucifermorningstar-official @the-speedster-god @lethia-not-athena @the-god-ofwar @seleneandheliosog @mother-of-trust @princess-of-jade @notesbyaphrodite @justice-bringer @god-of-smithing-and-cozy-vibes @amber-the-unknown @apollo-ask-blog @least-favorite-ares-kid @that-roman-arsonist @/anyone )

(my master list)

(tell me if you want to be added or remove)

[haley-harrison]

Bringing this back bc it bears repeating

Just had my first w*ncest post sighting on this app. What the actual fuck

[andr0leda]

put ur marriage reviews in the tags/replies if you wanna :^)

[snflwr-grl]

normalize spelling haley’s name right bc it’s not hayley or hailey it’s HALEY

[marias-new-blog-ig]

Love it when I see fanart of stardew valley characters with nose or helix or facial piercings because like where are they getting those done. is there a secret piercing parlour in pelican town that we don't know bout. Is Harvey doing them

[lily-alphonse]

Rarepair Challenge✨ (Submissions Closed)

Send me an ask of any wild Stardew ship pairing (base game) and I will make a convincing argument for how it would work / how I would write them. Even non-marriageable candidates are fine I want crazy pairings fr. I just love thinking about this shit and I love a challenge give it to meeee (pls only send 1 pair per ask, multiple asks are fine!)

If one gets popular enough I will consider writing it perhaps ;)

EDIT : Submissions closed and the winner of the poll was Marnie x Marlon, out on AO3 now!

ANSWERS MASTERLIST:

Alex x Elliott

Alex x Haley

Alex x Leah

Alex x Penny

Alex x Sam

Alex x Sebastian

Alex x Shane

Abigail x Emily

Abigail x Haley

Abigail x Maru

Birdie x Willy

Caroline x M. Rasmodius

Clint x Sandy

Elliott x Emily

Elliott x Gus

Elliott x Harvey

Elliott x Penny

Elliott x Sam

Elliott x Sandy

Elliott x Sebastian

Elliott x Shane

Elliott x Willy

Emily x Leah

Emily x Penny

Emily x Sandy

Emily x Shane

Gunther x Willy

Gus x Linus

Gus x Marnie

Gus x Willy

Haley x Harvey

Haley x Leah

Haley x Maru

Haley x Penny

Haley x Robin

Haley x Sam

Haley x Sandy

Haley x Sebastian

Haley x Shane

Harvey x Shane

Leah x Sandy

Leah x Shane

Linus x Rasmodius

Marlon x Marnie

Marlon x Rasmodius

Maru x Sam

Morris x Pierre

Morris x Shane

Penny x Sam

Penny x Sandy

Penny x Shane

Rasmodius x Mr. Qi

Sam x Shane

Sandy x Shane

Sebastian x Shane

Shane x Mr. Qi

If you are a writer yourself feel free to use these ideas with credit!

[haley-harrison]

so my bestie is autistic and she has this vocal stim where she'll make random noises. Since we were roommates in uni (and are again now), I've subconsciously picked it up without noticing. Then I was visiting my mom and randomly went "skreee", and she quirked an eyebrow and went

"My child, wtf?"

Which is when I first realized I was even doing it, for fun. My squad jokes about this like

"picking up stims from your autistic bestie and getting misdiagnosed, lmao".

[illarios]

canonically demisexual lucanis dellamorte i am winning so fucking hard right now there's tears in my eyes

[treatyofversigh]

[doctorobinavitch]

the one tree hill reboot is the worst thing to ever happen to me actually and i don't know what to do with all this rage i have now

[carpsurprise]

STAY AWAY FROM HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lily-alphonse]

Hello!

I haven't seen many Harvey asks...? Just in case, here's another.

Harvey and Haley.

🤔

Pretty rare... perhaps?

Thank you! Have a lovely day!

Hello! What a sweet ask ♥️

I just had an idea for this one today!

I accidentally misread the description of a fanfic and saw 'detective' Haley instead of 'dejected' Haley, and my mind went zoooooooom. I need detective Haley.

SO. Sorry but its gonna be another AU but hear me out it would be awesome.

We're going full film noire! It's a detective drama! Our favorite Mr. Pringles-mustachio'd man would be a private investigator. He's still a bit awkward and clumsy, we aren't making him suave. He works mostly on financial crimes, pencil-pushing stuff. He leaves the more dangerous stuff to his partner, Shane.

I imagined a snippet between them already so I'm just gonna yeet that here

"That stuff will kill you one of these days," Harvey mumbled over his paperwork, the smoke from Shane's cigar making it difficult to concentrate. "Eh. Something's gotta. And how about you go back to med school if you're gonna lecture?"

Anyway Shane goes MISSING. Harvey calls the police as he should, but they almost seem happy about his disappearance. Shane was quite famous, or infamous rather, for getting in the way of their investigations. Always seemed to show up where he wasn't wanted.

Harvey is going to have to do some real investigating. Get his hands dirty for once.

His investigations lead him to cross paths with Haley. A damn bombshell of a woman, and a bit of a distraction, if he's honest.

But PLOT TWIST, there's a reason she keeps happening to show up over the course of his investigations.

Unbeknownst to Harvey, she's been his rival for years. She's the most private type of investigator there is. Takes every pain to keep her identity a secret, moves like a ghost and weaponizes her womanhood.

But Harvey is smart. He figures it out in a climactic scene where he accuses her of having something to do with Shane's disappearance.

Haley for her part was actually starting to feel for the man. He is sweet and earnest and smart and not at all the kind of man she is used to in this business. She swears she had nothing to do with it and only wants to help.

But can she be trusted?

eeeeeeeeeeeeee this one is getting me really hyped actually lol

Send me any Stardew Valley rarepair and I will tell you how I would make them work! (Even non-marriage npcs) If youre lucky you may get a mini fic out of it. Check the list below to see if Ive already answered yours

Rarepair Masterlist