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#had her ignore me for days because I couldn’t afford the games she wanted to play
thecrimsondandelion · 2 years
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Somebody I’ve given all my friendship and energy to, who has said just the most horrible things about me behind my back
And here i am sobbing
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alessioa · 10 months
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Lucy Bronze x Lioness!Reader
Head aches and a concerned Lucy
In which reader refuses to stay home even though Lucy isn't happy with it.
CW: Migraines? Passing out
Kind of based on this request.
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Migraines, a funny thing that was. One moment you could feel kind of fine and the next your head was filled with unbearable pain to the point where it felt as if  you would throw up and pass out. Those moments were the worst. 
So when you woke up to the aching in your head and nausea you tried your best to get out of bed without waking Lucy. She had told you countless times that you should wake her, but no. 
Slowly you made your way to the bathroom as it felt as if you were about to throw up. In there you passed out in front of the toilet.
When Lucy woke up she felt your side of the bed and it was cold and you were nowhere to be seen. “Y/n” she whispered, then repeated herself but louder as you didn’t answer. She got worried and began to look around the house, kitchen empty, living room empty, office empty. When she finally found you - you were still passed out in the bathroom.
Lucy carefully shook your body to wake you up. When your  eyes  began to flutter a pained groan left your throat as you regained consciousness the pain came hurling back and it felt as if someone was hitting the inside of your head with a hammer. 
Lucy looked at you a little worried that you might have injured yourself or something. “What happened” she asked when it looked like you were present. “Migraines” you whispered, not wanting to talk too loudly because then the pain in your head would be amplified. 
“Oh baby, you know that you can wake me up. Why didn’t you?” she seemed so concerned when she asked the question that you  almost felt guilty for not waking her. “Didn’t wanna be a bother” you mumbled, not proud of yourself for it. 
“Okay, but next time please let me know. How about I call Sarina and tell her that we are sick, I don’t think that you can train today”. At that you quickly shook your head, you couldn’t afford to miss training because it was your first call up to the national team and you didn’t want to risk anything.
“No, I’m fine. I can train today” you answered, your voice as steady as you could make it. “Y/n” Lucy warned, she really didn’t like that you dismissed your pain so quickly. “I said I’m fine, now leave it. I will train today” you answered with a harsh tone. 
Maybe training wasn’t the best choice today. You tried your best but with the other girls around and their loud volume they didn’t really help the pain in your head. And apparently Lucy had told Sarina too as she didn’t push you too hard and it was clear that she focused on you quite a lot during the day. But so was Lucy. She was always around and she tried her best to quiet the girls, it was not as successful as she wanted but it did help a little bit. 
Alessia and Ella were two of the loudest in camp, they were always together and often brought you along. And you usually did stuff with them, but they didn’t seem to catch the memo when you tried to ignore them as they didn’t exactly take your pain away but almost made it worse with their loud voices and laughter. Luckily you were saved by the trainers calling the team out on the field for a scramble. 
After a 7v7 game the pain in your head had  not passed and now on top of that you were exhausted. That unfortunately led to you passing out in the middle of the field, scaring your teammates who called the medics on quickly when you didn’t respond to them or move. 
Lucy felt guilty, she knew the reason for you passing out being your migraines and exhaustion. She should have fought harder to keep you home and maybe then you wouldn’t be in this situation. 
When the medics assured  everyone that you weren’t injured they brought you into the medical room where they waited for you to wake up. When you did, Lucy was by your side holding your hand. She looked so concerned. 
“Maybe I should have stayed home” you said, catching her attention as she hadn’t noticed  that you had woken up. “You should have stayed home” she agreed.
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darcydarlingdabbles · 4 months
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Born to Survive (2/2)
part 2 of Astarion's Romance scene in act 1
part 1 link
Astarion x f!Tav (tiefling), Canon Compliant, Explicit af
4.2k
//This one tried to kill me. Smut, angst, comfort, oh my. Game accurate dialogue up to a point. CW: Good in bed, bad at emotions. Unhealthy...everything when it comes to sex/emotions. Bad communication?? But happy ending. This is the night with Tav that changes everything for Astarion.// Song Rec: The Death of Peace of Mind by Bad Omens
Astarion’s keen ears caught the moment Tav entered the moonlit clearing.
The vampire spawn felt the familiar prickling anticipation of the game he was about to play—a dance of manipulation and survival, dressed up in the silvery light. Where he could slip into the role he was created play. The seductive predator, dangerous and irresistible.
Yet, not so much as to forfeit her faith in him.
An unfamiliar flutter stirred within the pale elf. She was just another pawn in his web. Nothing was different just because he knew her name. And he should not be secretly happy that she would survive to see the sun rise tomorrow.
Astarion ignored the rush of his long since dead heart. This was self preservation; nothing more.
This yearning for anything else was dangerous as putting a stake in her hands.
He could not afford to care how she felt about him, beyond whether or not she would protect him.
Astarion removed his jacket methodically, folding it with deliberate care. As he pulled at the laces of his white shirt, memories came unbidden—clothing pooled around ankles, ripped away from his body, discarded like they weren’t all he had to his name.
Cazador’s mocking voice sneered in his mind. Reminding him of his place. On his knees. On his back. All he was good for.
He draped his folded shirt over a low branch, silencing the heartless laugh echoing in his memory as he slid on the mask he’d donned for centuries.
Astarion’s undead heart might as well b e made of stone. There was nothing left of him but the charm he cast.
“There you are.” Astarion greeted with the hint of a purr in his voice as he stepped from behind a towering oak with a smile already curving his lips.
He let his gaze rake appreciatively over Tav’s form, gratified when her eyes darted from his face to drink in his bared chest and down his body.
The blush on her cheeks when she was caught was just…delicious.
“I’ve been waiting, waiting since the moment I set eyes on you,” Astarion soothed, gliding closer. The moonlight caressed his alabaster skin, lending him an ethereal, almost ghostly beauty. 
At least, he hoped that was how he appeared, striking and seductive in the silver glow.
His prowl came to a stop merely inches from Tav, catching the hitch in her breath as she still hadn’t spoken. Thrilling him with how utterly captivated she was.
“Waiting…to have you.” he finished in a silken murmur, reaching a delicate hand to trail his cool fingers over her flushed cheek.
Suddenly, the tiefling’s eyes snapped up to meet his. Her body reanimated as she shifted from foot to foot with a slash of her tail.
“You sure, Astarion?” Tav asked, Her voice was a maddeningly gentle whisper, her brow creased with a vexing worry.
Why did she have to make this so damn difficult? Couldn’t she just enjoy what they both clearly wanted?
Instead Tav had to ask those weighted words, like she was trying disarm his every charm.
No.
He couldn’t let her pry her way under his flirtatious mask. Whatever broken, battered creature cowered behind his facade could not see the light of day. Astarion had a role to play. The lover Tav would do anything to protect.
His smile never wavered as he steered her away from anything more meaningful than their little dance now, until bairly a hair’s breadth separated their bodies.
“Don’t I have you?” he said with honey in his voice and want in his crimson eyes. “You’re here…and I don’t think you want to talk.”
Knowing her gaze was intent on him, Astarion let his focus drift down the curves of her body—taking in the way her tiefling tail betrayed her. Despite the worry on her brow, Tav’s arrant appendage curled at the tip in obvious interest.
Astarion’s charms were eroding even the hero’s defenses, as they should.
Tav’s full lips parted, and before she could voice another irritatingly perceptive question, Astarion wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling their bodies flush at last.
“I think you want to be known…to be tasted.” His breath ghosted across her skin.
Slowly, giving her time to pull away, he raised a hand to cup her cheek, caressing the fading puncture marks with his thumb.
Finally, Tav shivered at his touch. Her slit pupils went wide, and her tail curled fully to the small of her back. Just when he was about to taste her lips for the first time…she had to open her mouth.
“What do you want, Astarion?”
In his wretchedly long mockery of a life, no one had ever asked him that. No lover. No target. And certainly no master.
Why did Tav threaten to crack his facade with every damn word she said.
What did he want? Blood. Protection. Freedom. Safety.
Astarion sliced that thread before either of them could follow it too closely.
The vampire turned Tav’s head, breaking that too honest gaze, letting his lips brush her pointed ear instead. “What do any of us want? Pleasure. Yours, mine, our collective ecstasy.” He let each word drip with promise.
Her resistance finally melted away.
A smile graced that sweet mouth and her lithe form leaned into his. She reached for him at last, her hands coming to rest on his waist, and he could nearly sigh as the heat of her skin seeped into his perpetual chill.
Her touch was still too tentative for him.
Astarion captured her wrists in his long fingers, drawing her hands up along the sculpted planes of his chest to loop around his neck, ducking his head to tease his lips over hers. "
“That’s it. That’s what you want, isn’t it…to lose yourself in me?”
He wasn’t asking. It was what they always wanted. His touch. His attention. His body. All he was good for.
“Astarion…”
The vampire nearly gloated when she sighed his name—the noble tone was so weak under the want.
At last, Astarion had dragged the honorable Tav down to his level of depravity.
Her pulse thrummed wildly under his palms, betraying her at last. How badly she must want him. How he’d stripped away her suspicion and caution until only need remained.
“I thought so.” He purred with pure gratification.
Tav leaned up on her toes, pressing through the hands cupping her face, and closing the distance between their mouths.
Astarion had kissed countless lips in his time. Thousands of fleeting moments, rushed, careless, clashing, teeth and tongues.
Tav’s kiss was nothing like that.
It was warm, reverent in a way Astarion knew he did not deserve, even as he slid easily into the motions. Trying to bury her tenderness in wanton desire.
But then, Tav leaned into his palm, nuzzling her cheek into his hand, pointed fingers threading through his.
And it was such an artless, intimate gesture that suddenly threatened to choke him.
Desperate to quash this unnamed feeling before it could take root—Astarion claimed Tav’s mouth in a searing kiss. Biting her bottom lip to banish any sweetness she gave.
Tav could feel her pulse fluttering in her ears as Astarion caressed her every curve with effortless grace. His lips felt like they were everywhere, and his skilled tongue stoked a delicious heat within the tiefling.
She was lost to every delicate touch. His nimble fingers deftly undid the laces of her bodice, unhooking the fastenings of her trousers.
Tav hardly noticed until he was pulling her to step out of the puddle of her clothes to be pulled into the hard line of his body against hers.
His elegance was unmatched to any lover she’d had. They hardly needed to exchange—and Astarion seemed disinclined to speak at all as he lavished attention down her neck and her collarbones with his perfect mouth.
Tav was desperate. Not just for more skin-tingling touches, but to return some of the bliss he bestowed on her.
Her fingers grasped at Astarion’s silken hair, catching him for a moment so she could leave her own kisses along the chiseled line of his jaw, down the pale column of his neck.
The vampire’s throat went motionless under her mouth the lower she went. Of course, she didn’t expect to feel a fluttering pulse, but it was like he’d forgotten to breathe. Had passion erased his pretense of needing air?
Tav just wondered this as her lips reached the twin scars on his neck—and Astarion went rigid.
Her heart seized.
She overstepped, maybe reminded him of his painful past, and she had to apologize.
The words were already on her tongue, when he caught her by the chin and pulled her back.
“As much as I enjoy your affections, darling,” he purred, ruby eyes gleaming wickedly, “I have much better plans for that sweet mouth of yours.”
Then he was kissing her again, deeply, ardently. Tav whined as the points of his fangs grazed her bottom lip, sending licks of fire through her veins. He knew exactly what he was doing as he ravished her, and  her awkwardness forgotten as he tried to drown her in arousal.
Nothing existed but Astarion’s clever hands, his sinful lips, and the delicious ache building between her thighs.
The awkwardness of the moment was forgotten as she clung to him. Nothing compared to the intensity of being the focus of Astarions attention. She felt ravished before he even stooped to wrap her legs around his waist, but he barely broke their kiss.
Tav eagerly complied, locking her arms around his shoulders, careful of his neck, though curling her quivering tail around his torso too.
Astarion pressed her into the rough bark of a nearby tree, his hands digging possessively into her thighs.
She couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her. She was giddy with arousal, slicker still as she felt the hard length of his cock just press against her.
Gods, she needed him inside her.
“Playful little tiefling.” Astarion murmured appreciatively, his voice like dark velvet against her ear.
Tav giggled again, giving a deliberate twitch of her tail. “Well, biting is basically foreplay for my kind,” she teased, fingers threading through his curls, careful of the points of her nails as she murmured against his lips. “I shoulda warned ya, before that first little nibble by the campfire.”
If their bodies weren't so closely interlaced, their noses gently grazing each other as Astarion teasingly ground his hips into hers, stirring her eagerness for the forthcoming fervor, she may have missed the swift flicker of emotion that danced across Astarion's handsome face.
Uncertainty. Discomfort even…at being bitten? That made sense he would be cautious of the reminder—but the expression was gone in a blink. Replaced with a roguish grin.
“Is that so? Then you’ve already surrendered yourself to me.”
Oh, how damn cocky could a man be?
Sure, he was turning her to a mess just rutting against her. But Tav arched a brow. “I can’t just…let you win.”
The tiefling simpered, even as she tilted her head to the side, baring the tantalizing line of her throat. Showing off the fading bite.
That bright ruby gaze darkened, rivited, zeroed in on her fluttering pulse. He leaned in, fangs bared, as she slid her tail away from him.
In flick of her tail, Tav leveraged herself off of the tree, sending them both tumbling into the soft grass.
She landed atop him, legs caging his hips, grinning at his startled expression.
“Gotcha.”
To Tav’s surprise and delight, a warm and genuine laugh burst from Astarion’s lips. His eyes sparkled with an inner light, bright and unreserved in a way she’d never seen from him before. Tav was transfixed by just the glimpse of raw, unguarded emotion on his face.
The spell couldn’t last forever.
Astarion’s hands seized her hips, using his vampiric strength and speed to flip Tav onto her back, pinning her into the grass.
Her air escaped in a huff as he captured her wrists and pressed them into the ground, rendering her wonderfully helpless.
“Alright, alright, I yield!” Tav laughed breathlessly, squirming only half-heartedly in his stone grip. “You win.”
Still smiling, she tipped her head back, baring her throat in surrender—eliciting a low, greedy sound from Astarion. This time, he did not hesitate.
Hot, stinging pleasure burst through her blood as the vampire’s fangs sank into her skin. She shivered, happily helpless, under the icy ecstasy of his bite. His body leaned heavily and perfectly into the cradle of hers.
His long fingers came around to cushion her head, just as the first night he fed from her. Tav hardly noticed when Astarion released her wrists, other than she could dreamily slide her fingers into his white curls. On instinct, she brushed the pads of her thumbs along the tender points of his ears.
Astarion startled in her hold.
A blissful sound echoed against her throat, and the twin points of pain disappeared as his focus wavered. He pulled back from her, crimson lingering on his lips.
“Elves and their ears.” Tav answered his unasked question, repeating the gentle stroke to prove her point, gratified when he was the one to give a shudder. “Shall I stop?”
“Don’t you dare,” Astarion growled playfully, before diving back down to reclaim her lips. She teased his gorgeous ears as long as he would allow, before he seemed to remember himself—and pulled back with a darker gaze.
“Let me show you my favorite trick.” He purred, kissing a trail down her heated body. Lavishing attention on her breasts before settling between her thighs like he belonged there.
His strong, elegant hands curled under her hips, lifting her soaking folds to his wickedly talented tongue.
The first stroke across her clit had Tav arching with a cry, sparks igniting behind her eyelids. Astarion was relentless, laving and suckling with single-minded focus, devouring her pussy like he hungered for nothing else. His clever fingers slid into her, thrusting and curling with unerring accuracy.
He was overwhelming in the most delightful way.
“Astarion,” Tav gasped, half a sob in her throat. Her fingers tangled in his hair. Pleasure was building inside her like a cresting wave until she thought she might shatter from it. 
Just as the peak crashed over her, Tav’s tail curled adoringly around Astarion’s arm, the spaded tip digging into his bicep. Astarion groaned against her, the sound reverberating through her pussy—until she was trembling in the grass.
“Darling…I am not finished with you yet.” his breath was panting against his thigh, his lips shining with her slick in the moonlight.
His eyes burned into hers as he lowered his mouth back to her, drawing a feral whimper from her mouth. He worked her through the aftershocks with his lips and mouth and the edge of his teeth—then built her back up again, drawing every ounce of pleasure from the tiefling’s body until she was left boneless and blissed out.
By the time Tav found her voice again, she’d lost count of how many times he’d made her come. 
“Astarion,” she rasped. “Please. I need you.”
In a flash, he was over her, the blunt head of his cock nudging against her entrance. 
“I thought you’d never ask,” he said with that damnable roguish grin.
Then he was sliding into her, hard and thick and perfect, and Tav could only hang on as he took her apart all over again. She was so sensitive, the pleasure bordering on pain, that it only took a few deep strokes before she was clenching around him, keening her release.
Astarion swallowed the sound with his mouth, kissing her deeply as he continued to move within her. Tav felt owned, treasured, utterly consumed by the brilliant creature in her arms. In that moment, she would have happily let him devour her whole.
Astarion thrust into her with smooth, measured strokes, the perfect rhythm to draw out her satisfaction. His face was buried in the crook of her neck as he murmured filthy praises against her skin, just as he was supposed to.
“You are so terribly intoxicating, my love. So perfectly wrapped around me. Like you were made just to undo me.”
Tav was a mess under him, her careful words lost to the sensation of him moving inside her. Her limbs tangled around him and she tried to pull him down for a kiss.
Astarion evaded her lips, lavishing attention on her throat instead. Letting his mind slip away again.
It wasn’t long before she was clenching around him again, shuddering through another intense climax. Astarion worked her through it, then gradually slowed his pace. When Tav finally resurfaced, sated and pliant in his arms.
Just where he needed her to be.
“Fuck,” she sighed, pressing the heel of her palm over her eyes as she still caught her breath. He slid from her still quivering body, though she still clung to him with her curled tail.
“I shall take that as a compliment.” He chuckled at her side, pressing his lips to the skin before her ear.
“Astarion, did you…?”
The vampire tensed almost imperceptibly before pulling back to look at her, a practiced smile curving his lips. 
“I was, concentrating…you had me captivated, darling.” He glossed over. It was easy to ignore his own ache, and most of his conquests were happy to let him. “Brilliant, beautiful thing you are.”
Astarion eased, pressing her back into the grass. He sat up, resting on his bent knee, as he let himself detachment from the moment.
Tav's frown caught his attention as she studied him from where she was still laid back in the moonlit grass. “Hey, is everything okay? I want to make you feel good, too.”
Her words took him by surprise. Make him feel good? That simply didn’t factor into any script he played in someone else’s bed.
His mouth opened and closed in silent confusion before he shook off the disorientation.
"I...no, everything’s fine. Wonderful, in fact. You’ve been perfect, darling," he responded smoothly. Astarion couldn’t pull his mask into place. Weak, vulnerable, aching—confused as to what he should do next.
But there was no dungeon to draw her towards. No master to turn her over to. Tav was not a target. What was he meant to do?
Astarion laid back, wondering if he should feign exhaustion. Until Tav fell asleep and he could slip away.
With a gentle smile, and a little unsteady as she rose, Tav slid her hands up Astarion’s chest to frame his face. “Let me concentrate on you now,” she murmured, shifting until she was straddling his hips again.
He clung to her waist on instinct, but didn’t grip hard enough to stop her from moving over him.
“Is that alright, Astarion?”
She kept saying his name, drawing his eyes back to hers, to the want in hers that was more than want.
The warmth was overwhelming.
“Yes,” He agreed, hearing his own breathless assent. Telling himself it was just to be relieved of that adoring look in her eyes.
Tav drew him along her palm, sinking down on his hardness inch by heavenly inch. 
Astarion gasped gently. For once, he seemed at a loss for words, ruby eyes wide and locked on hers as she began to move.
Undulating slowly, Tav leaned in to capture his lips, kissing him deeply, reverently. 
His own mouth was…hesitant. The way she kissed him, the way she kissed, the way she moved, dragged that unbidden yearning from somewhere deep inside him.
Like his first taste of her neck, something about this felt forbidden. Too rich for his blood.
But then Astarion was kissing Tav back feverishly, sitting up to tangle one hand in her hair to hold her close. Like he was starving all over again.
Tav kept the pace languid, letting Astarion savor every slide and press, her pussy quivering around him still. He’d thought he’d worn her out so thoroughly—but she persisted.
She peppered kisses across his angular cheekbones, the corner of his mouth, his temples. Astarion shuddered beneath her, a soft whimper escaping him as she rolled her hips just so.
“That’s it, sweetheart,” Tav crooned. “Just feel. Let go for me.”
Time seemed to slip from him yet again—but he felt every breath against his lips, her forehead pressed to his with agonizing sweetness. Her fingers curled into the hair at the base of his neck, and he clung to her in turn.
Astarion felt his body stiffen involuntarily, a flicker of apprehension. His armor trying to snap back into place, one last ditch attempt to wall him off.
“Tav…” his voice was a broken plea.
Her relentless warmth ceased every vulnerability in him. Her arms wrapped around him, shielding out the rest of the world, the rest of his thoughts.
Those damnable eyes with unwavering affection as they locked onto his.
"I've got you," Tav murmured with a fervor that echoed through him. "You're so good, Astarion."
Her words sent him spiraling into the abyss with a ragged gasp as his climax washed over him, spilling deep within her.
Astarion could feel her arms drawing him closer, her fingers threading through his curls and whispering praises and reassurances that seeped into his dead marrow.
He clung to her desperately, hiding himself in the crook of her neck as he was the one to tremble.
In this moment, stripped bare of all pretenses and disguises he wore. All Astarion could do was cling tighter to Tav, hoping that she could feel even a sliver of the affection and reverence that burned within him.
Astarion watched her as she lay back, unable to rip his eyes away or compose his face in to something prettier.
She laughed breathlessly, but the elf remained still, waiting. Bracing himself for the inevitable withdrawal, for her warmth to leave him bereft and alone once more.
That part of the script was surely still intact.
They took their pleasure, then cast him aside. Or worse.
But Tav did neither.
She nestled close, resting her head on his chest with a contented sigh. Astarion glanced down at her, watching the way her fingers idly traced invisible patterns on his cool skin. The casual intimacy of it made his throat tighten.
After a moment, Tav lifted her gaze to his, a playful smile curving her kiss-swollen lips. “Not much for cuddling after?” she teased gently, but she was already lifting herself off of him.
Astarion huffed a laugh, hoping it masked the confused tangle of emotions her tenderness evoked. “It’s not exactly my forte.” 
He should be using his glib charm to get them back to camp, saying they should get some sleep. But with Tav...he hesitated. Loath to break this fragile, unfamiliar spell between them. 
As if sensing his inner turmoil, Tav shifted to lay her head in the grass beside him, relinquishing her claim on his space.
But as her warmth and weight left him, Astarion felt strangely bereft. Unmoored. His hand darted out to catch hers, lacing their fingers together as he turned to face her.
Tav’s ever-radiant smile dawned across her face. She squeezed his hand gently, like it was the most precious thing she’d ever held. “This okay?” she asked softly.
Slowly, deliberately, she brought his knuckles to her lips, pressing a lingering kiss to the back of his hand. Like he was the prey she feared startling.
Tav slid their joined hands up to rest over Astarion’s still heart, her expression open and tender in a way that made his breath catch.
Astarion swallowed hard to gain even a tenuous control. “More than,” he managed, voice rough with everything he couldn’t quite say.
Tav smiled at him, and those bright eyes held nothing—no guile, no ulterior motive. Only affection and a hint of something that looked dangerously close to…adoration.
It terrified him even as some long-dormant part of his soul ached for more.
“Good,” he breathed at last, barely recognizing his own voice.
As he slid his arm around Tav’s shoulders, pulling her back to his chest beneath the star-strewn sky, a sudden realization hit him with the force of a charging bulette.
In all his long existence, he had never spent the night with a lover. Had never wanted to. But now, with Tav a warm, trusting weight in his arms, he found himself hoping desperately that this wouldn’t be the last time.
There would be time to figure this out later, he told himself. To untangle the confusing snarl of warmth and want and unspoken yearning twisting beneath his ribs. 
And yet, as Tav’s breathing gradually slowed and deepened with the onset of sleep, Astarion discovered that there was nowhere in all the realms he’d rather be.
Perhaps, just this once, he could let himself have this. Could dare to imagine a future beyond mere survival.
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starryhyuck · 4 years
Text
dangerous game. (m)
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pairing: dilf!jaehyun x younger!reader
words: 1.9k+
summary: jaehyun is your father’s co-worker, but it’s not your fault that he’s undeniably hot.
genre: smut
warnings: older!jaehyun, younger!reader, car sex, public sex, creampie, breeding kink, mentions of pregnancy
“It’s not like he’s your dad, you know.”
You glare at Sookyung, who’s innocently sipping at her glass of champagne. You pinch her arm and she squeals.
“He could be! He’s just as old as my dad,” you comment, eyes roaming over Jeong Jaehyun’s figure.
He was just recently hired into your father’s corporation and proven himself to be a worthy asset, his dimples charming everyone who comes his way. He’s built up a strong relationship with your parents, bringing over his daughter to hang out with you sometimes. You wonder if he’ll always see you as a kid — a friend of his daughter’s to have play dates with.
Speaking of the devil, Haerim bounces over and smiles at you and Sookyung. Luckily, Haerim got her looks from her mother so you don’t feel so odd when you gaze over at her.
“How are you two doing? I’m kind of bored,” she comments, fingers gripping her own champagne glass.
Sookyung gives you the eye and you know what she’s thinking — you practically sped home from college just to stare at Jaehyun all night, jumping at your father’s invitation as soon as he called.
“We’re doing fine,” Sookyung replies, and you grow wary of her mischievous smile. “How about you and your dad? Any luck with finding him a date?”
Haerim shakes her head. “Nope. He’s probably just not ready to move on yet.”
Sookyung grins. “Maybe he just hasn’t met the right girl.”
You glare at her. Haerim shrugs.
“Yeah, maybe.”
It’s only a few weeks later when you come home for Christmas. Your father greets you at the door and your mother lets you know they have company over. You try to keep your resolve when you see Jaehyun at the table, his smile taking your breath away like it always has.
“Jaehyun’s spending Christmas with us,” your father mentions as you take your seat.
“And Haerim?” You ask, eyes locking with Jaehyun’s.
“At her mother’s for the holidays,” Jaehyun responds, dark eyes gazing at you. You nod, and as soon as you dig into your meal, your father and Jaehyun are chatting it up. “That’s crazy, Doyoung. I couldn’t imagine any of the investors buying that crap.”
Your father laughs and your mother leans over to speak with you.
“I want you to be nice to Jaehyun while he’s here. He’s having a rough time, first holiday after the divorce and everything.”
You smile. “I’ll keep him good company, I promise.”
She pats your cheek. “That’s my girl.”
It’s later in the night when you keep your promise, knocking on the guest room door. You’ve taken Sookyung’s advice and luckily packed all of your best underwear, matching bra and all. You know deep down you shouldn’t get your hopes up, especially since Jaehyun is still learning to live without his wife.
All those thoughts are thrown away, however, when he opens the door. You grin innocently at him.
“I hope you’re enjoying your stay, Mr. Jeong. I was just checking up on you.”
He smirks, leaning against the doorframe. “Is that so? Well, thank you for being such a hospitable host.”
Sookyung’s words bounce around in your head, still lingering when you called her after dinner. Flirt. Remind him you’re very mature for your age. And wear that red thong I bought you for your birthday!
You laugh. “Yes, well, I think my father would be upset if he knew I wasn’t being very friendly.”
He chuckles and nods his head. “We can’t have that, can we?”
“No, we can’t.”
Your gazes lock, and you swear his eyes darken a little. He opens his mouth to say something before you hear footsteps. Your father comes around the corner, smiling and placing his hand on your shoulder.
“I can see you’re treating Jaehyun nicely.”
“She was,” Jaehyun answers. “You raised her well, Doyoung.”
“I hope so,” your father laughs, placing a kiss on your head. “Listen, Jaehyun, we’re going out tomorrow to get all the groceries we need to make Christmas dinner. I was wondering if you would tag along with Y/N to find a suitable tree for the living room.”
Your eyes practically light up, and Jaehyun chuckles.
“I think that would be fine,” he nods, gaze returning to you. “We’ll leave in the morning?”
You smile. “Sounds good.”
Car rides with Jaehyun are more arousing than you expected. You’ve been on edge since you’ve been on the road with him, mainly because you’re unsure of how to make the first move. If he ends up not even liking you in that way, he could definitely tell your father and further humiliate you.
“You’re quiet this morning.”
Your head darts to look over at him, his fingers gripping the steering wheel tightly. “Oh,” you laugh awkwardly. “Just a lot on my mind, I guess.”
“Care to enlighten me?” He hums.
This is a very dangerous game.
“I just- um-“ you pause, trying to comprehend your thoughts. Jaehyun chuckles at your internal struggle. Oh God. What if he just sees me as a kid? I’m wearing this uncomfortable thong and all he sees is his daughter’s little friend-
“I don’t think we can,” he comments, taking you off guard.
You frown. “Don’t think we can what?”
He sighs. “I want to be with you in that way, but your dad-“
Your eyes widen. “Wait wait wait. You like me? I mean, you like me like that?”
He smirks, taking his eyes off of the road for a mere second to glance at you. “Yes, I like you like that. But it’s too complicated. You’re young, and-“
You scoff. “I’m not that young.”
“You’re as young as my daughter,” he reminds you. “And your father and I are good friends. Plus, he has all the power to fire me whenever he wants, and I don’t think I can afford to lose my job right now.”
Sookyung’s voice grows louder in your head. Make him want you. Show him he can’t resist.
Your eyelashes flutter closed, fingers drifting down to your core.
“Y/N, what are you doing?”
You ignore him, one hand slithering into your underwear and stroking your folds gently. You throw your head back and moan. You can feel the car swerve a little.
“Y/N, you shouldn’t be doing this. I’m driving, this is dangerous and I-“
“Touch me, Mr. Jeong,” you beg, opening your eyes to stare directly at him. “Please?”
It isn’t long before he pulls over on the side of the road and leans over the console to press his lips against yours. You whimper when his fingers tug on your hair, exposing your neck to him.
“Such a little slut,” he hisses, lips attaching to your neck and sucking gently. “We could’ve gotten into an accident.”
“But we didn’t,” you remind him, guiding his hand to your core. “Can you fuck me now?”
He growls. “Filthy little mouth. Does your dad know you talk this way?”
You shake your head. “No, daddy wouldn’t like that.”
He curses lowly and you know you’ve got him. He pushes the seat all the way back and climbs until he’s hovering over you, tongue desperately exploring the expanse of your mouth. He replaces your fingers with his, digits slowly playing with your folds before sliding two into your waiting hole. You whine into the kiss and he pauses briefly.
“You’re not a-“
“Virgin?” You raise an eyebrow. “No. But don’t tell daddy.”
He growls, attacking you once again and curling his fingers upwards. You’re both lucky he’s pulled over to an abandoned part of the town, and his tinted windows giving you even further security.
“We have to be quick, baby,” he whispers breathlessly. “Still have to bring a tree home.”
The clothes come off quickly after that, your hands gripping Jaehyun’s shirt and flinging it over your shoulder. He laughs at your eagerness, palming at your breast and kissing your mound.
“Such a pretty body,” he murmurs, lips darting over your nipple. You moan and arch your back.
“Yeah? Prettier than your ex-wife’s?”
He smirks. “Prettier. Younger. Hotter.”
You whimper when he throws your dress to the side, fingers dancing over your choice of underwear.
“Isn’t that pretty? You wear that for me, sweet girl?”
You giggle. “Only for you, daddy.”
He flips you over, smacking your ass along the way. You enjoy the way he manhandles you, pulling your hair back and tugging it harshly.
“Is this how you like it? Exposed like a whore for anyone to see? What would your parents say if they saw you like this?”
“What would your daughter say if she saw you about to fuck a girl the same age as her?” You counter.
He smiles. “She wouldn’t like it, that’s for sure.”
You feel his tip prod your entrance and you moan, gripping the headrest of the passenger seat. Jaehyun kisses your shoulders, cupping your breasts and sliding into you.
You cry at the stretch, feeling every ridge and vein of his cock as he enters you. He’s thick. And huge. Definitely the biggest you’ve ever taken.
He curses in your ear. “Fuck, baby. Your pussy’s so fucking tight.”
“Never-“ you gasp, catching your breath when he sinks deeper and deeper. “Never had someone this big, daddy.”
You both groan when he bottoms out, lips parting at the pleasure you’re receiving. You feel so full, and Jaehyun’s cock is like a fever dream.
“Jaehyun, please,” you beg, aching for him to move.
He follows your order, grabbing your hips and snapping into you. You moan loudly, the sound of his hips connecting with your thighs echoing throughout the vehicle. He feels so perfect inside of you and you blubber his name over and over again.
You imagine how sinful you both look, with Jaehyun fucking you desperately in the passenger seat of his car, where Haerim probably sat when he used to drive her to school everyday. You whimper at the thought as Jaehyun drills into you, panting in your ear.
“Feels so good, baby,” he praises you. “Wanna fuck you all day.”
“Will you?” You ask, whining when he nudges against your sweet spot. “Will you fuck me when we get back home?”
“If you can stay quiet,” he chuckles and you giggle with him. He groans when you clench around him. “You going to cum for me, baby? Show me how much you want it, sweet girl.”
You fall apart around him, squeezing his cock for dear life as you orgasm. You’re completely spent but Jaehyun still plows into you, chasing his high. You prod him a little.
“Please, daddy. Want to feel you cum inside me.”
“Yeah?” He grunts, his voice dropping an octave. “Are you on the pill?”
The beat of silence is deafening. “What if I wasn’t?”
He groans. “Don’t mess with me, baby. I’m going to explode.”
“Wouldn’t you like to see that? Your cum dripping down my thighs at dinner, trying not to let my dad see? What if he found out I was pregnant? What would he do then?”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Jaehyun hisses. “Baby, I can’t. I’m going to cum.”
“Knock me up, Jae,” you giggle, pushing back against him. “Show everyone how filthy you are, getting a girl half your age pregnant with your child. What would Haerim think?”
He pushes deep inside you and cries out, shooting ribbons into your waiting womb. You smile deviously, pushing further back onto him so none of his cum would spill out. He’s still cumming after a minute, and his warmth fills your stomach.
You grin. “Had a lot to give me, didn’t you?”
He growls and leans down, nipping at your ear.
“I’m getting you pregnant while I’m here, you little minx.”
“Looking forward to it.”
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Best Draco/Hermione Fics Dramione Shippers Read in 2020
A few days ago, I asked you what were the best Dramione fics you'd read in 2020. Here's the huge list of your excellent recs (in alphabetical order):
A Creature Most Unusual by JMilz: Draco Malfoy is on a mission. Unfortunately, Hermione Granger catches him in the act. When she sees that he has adopted a rather unusual magical creature, she becomes determined to make sure he takes care of it. Little does she know, the animal may hold her key to eternal glory . . . and a whirlwind romance. M, 9 Chapters, 24,460 Words
A Little More Alive, Far Less Lost by MGL_Dramione_Lover: After Draco's post-war trial, he finds himself attending his 8th year at Hogwarts with Hermione. As remorse and acceptance replace anger and hate, the old enemies begin a friendship that sparks into much more than they ever hoped for. Hermione's goal as Head Girl is to banish old prejudices and unite the school while Draco's only wish is to become a man worthy of her love. M, 22 Chapters, 84,823
A New Light by mithrilstarlight: Draco spent six years doing his best to keep his head down. Then he runs into Hermione Granger. Turns out, they actually have a lot in common.Chapters posted M/W/F. T, 18 Chapters, 33,876 Words
A Second Look by RiverWriter: Her best friend's life was a mess and she would have done anything to make things better for him and his sons. So, when she found her former enemy in a similar situation her heart went out to him as well... and the beautiful blond baby in his arms didn't hurt his case. It was certainly enough for her to give him a second look. M, 30 Chapters, 127,243 Words
All that is Rare by smithandbarrowman: In the wizarding world, it has long been assumed that men are Alphas and women are Omegas. However, when Hermione Granger discovers that assumptions are rarely factual, her status as one of only a handful of female alphas that has ever existed has men falling at her feet.But there’s only one man she wants, and like the male alphas before her, the hunt is on until he bears her mark. E, 31 Chapters, 119,755 Words
All the Wrong Things by LovesBitca8: Sequel to "The Right Thing to Do" - Draco's POV. Part 2 of the "Rights and Wrongs" series. E, 24 Chapters, 160,297 Words
All You Want by senlinyu: Eighth Year at Hogwarts was supposed to be Hermione’s. And it is, just not in the way she expects. Omegaverse fic. E, 36 Chapters, 172,651
apples & cream by LovesBitca8: She could have taken her things and gone through his Floo without a word. She could have ignored him on Monday morning, as though last night had been no more than a fever dream and too much Firewhisky. But she’d come back to bed. Inspired by the lovely NikitaJuice's "apples & cream." E, 1 Chapter, 1,426 Words
Beginning and End by mightbewriting: Years. Broken into months into weeks into days—into hours, minutes, seconds—into moments. Simple at one end, complex at the other. In Draco’s experience, moments, even when simple, had a habit of becoming irretrievable. Moments grew, stretched, multiplied into ages and eras that defined whole stretches of measurable time. Draco regretted several moments in his life, some within his control, some without: all of them irretrievable in nature. At a certain point, wedged between ‘what-ifs’ of his own devising, he’d stopped trying to keep track of those regrettable moments: now and then, pushing and pulling, coming and going, beginning and end. Moments were only moments for just as long. After that, he had no control. A Draco POV prequel to Wait and Hope. E, 48 Chapters, 242,100 Words
Bells on a Hill by HeyJude19: Left by his fiancée a month before the ceremony, Draco never got his dream wedding, so agreeing to assist Granger with her own wedding planning to distract himself from his broken engagement seems like a great idea—though Draco probably shouldn't fall in love with the bride-to-be. Based very (very) loosely on The Wedding Singer. T, WIP
Bending Light by scullymurphy: Draco Malfoy was in exile, though they called it protection. It was the summer after sixth year and he'd taken Dumbledore's offer, defected to the other side and been sent away to a small town in Italy for his troubles. No magic, few rules, and not a lot to do - until Hermione Granger showed up. M, WIP
Break for me by Ada_P_Rix: COMPLETE _______________ "-I told them this wouldn’t work.” He cut in through gritted teeth as he kept his eyes on Hermione, making her pulse quicken and she couldn’t help but clench her thighs together at the rough, husky tone of his voice. He didn’t miss it; his eyes landed on her thighs and they darkened even further. “I can’t help her when all I feel like I want to do is pin her down and fuck her into the mattress.” _______________ Hermione gets into a little accident at work and is infected with a hybrid potion created to cause certain heightened side effects. Draco offers to stick around to give his work partner a little support ... if he can Occlude long enough to resist her... E, 7 Chapters, 45,107 Words
Breath Mints / Battle Scars by Onyx_and_Elm: For a moment, she's almost giddy. Because Draco Malfoy's been ruined by this war and he's as out of place as she is and — yes, he has scars too. He's got an even bigger one. She wonders whether one day they'll compare sizes. E, 51 Chapters, 148,908 Words
Bring Him to His Knees by Musyc: Draco is on the case of a murderer, but to investigate, he needs a fake relationship - and a kink club play partner. When Hermione volunteers to take the role, both do their best to maintain the lie without letting each other know the truth: neither of them are acting. E, WIP
Calendar Boys by anne_ammons, Nadiapolyakova (Rijaya83): She had thrown out the idea on a lark, but now Hermione Granger was tasked with bringing the charity calendar to life. What was one more thing on her list? An art/writing collaboration between nadiapolyakova and anne_ammons - twelve photos and a piece of the story behind them. M, WIP
Cherry Mint by dirtymudblood: "He could smell her. Even multiple train cars away, he could smell her. Except, Draco didn’t know who she was. He ignored his natural instincts to pant like a dog and follow the scent to the omega in the beginning stages of heat. Instead he willed himself to rub his knuckles against the rough wood of the table in front of him." E, 27 Chapters, 58,081 Words
Dark Water and Dying Eyebrights by bexchan: One of them is desperately trying to remember their past while the other is forever trying to escape theirs. It's seven years after the war and Draco has managed to avoid almost everyone from Hogwarts, living a lonely life on a small island, far away from the wizarding community. But a familiar face in a cafe window capsizes his world into chaos. Dramione. EWE. Memory fic. M, WIP
Difficult by provocative envy: COMPLETE: "I should," I repeated. "But I don't want to." And then he smiled, and I was wrecked. HG/DM. M, 30 Chapters, 87,041 Words
Don't Look Back by Onyx_and_Elm: It’s the smell of it. Chemical. Bitter and sharp as a raw edge on metal. Just a hint of it as she passes him at breakfast — but enough to stop her dead, mid-step. There is Wolfsbane in his tea. E, WIP
Don't Threaten Me with a Good Time by monsterleadmehome: She scoffs. “If you must know, he ‘elected’ me because he thinks our shared animosity will keep you in check. He’s also not worried about you trying to shag me as a distraction.” He leans back, stubbing out his cigarette on the banister. His eyes rove over her from crown to toe and back. She lifts her chin and tries not to shiver. “Well, he’s right about that.” Lucius Malfoy hires Hermione Granger to whip his son into shape so he can find a pure-blood bride and receive his inheritance. What could go wrong? E, 10 Chapters, 48,092 Words
Draco's Gift by TriDogMom: Draco gives Hermione a gift because of an instructional YouTube video. M, 1 Chapter, 1,705 Words
Dragon in the Dark by GracefulLioness: The battle is won, Voldemort is dead, but the war is far from over. In the new Death Eater regime, Draco Malfoy does what he must to survive and keep his mother safe. Now a highly trained assassin, Draco has learned to think of his targets as inhuman beings, but when he is tasked with killing someone from his past, he can no longer hide from the horrors of the world around him. E, 31 Chapters, 164,782 Words
For a Present Under the Tree by grace_lou_freebush: When Draco and Hermione eloped, the Wizarding World turned against them. Hermione is stuck in a low level, low paying Ministry job with no hope of upward movement. Draco can't even convince someone to hire him. Now, it's Christmas, and Draco knows Hermione deserves the world - or at the least a Christmas gift. He finds the perfect hair comb to replace the horrid Muggle brush she's been making due with, and he'll do anything to afford the paltry present so he can have something to put under the Christmas tree for his wife. Making a beeline for the jewelry box containing the hair combs, Draco rifled through them, landing on an ivory comb with queen anne rose carvings and gold filigree detailing. He brought it to the startled shopkeeper and set it down gently. Pulling his sixth generation Malfoy heirloom pocket watch from his coat, he shoved it in the wizard's face without second guessing himself. "I would like to make an exchange." E, 1 Chapter, 10,141 Words
Fortuitous by MrsRen: Recently divorced Draco doesn't believe in the ideology of having one true love. He certainly doesn't expect to meet his match in a Halloween themed coffee shop, but fate has a peculiar way of giving you just what you need. M, 13 Chapters, 93,695 Words
Fuck, Marry, Avada by Lilian_Silver: Some years after the war, the gang meets up at the Leaky to play a silly game, with very real consequences. E, 1 Chapter, 3,106 Words
Give Me An Hour by RZZMG: As the war continues to rage on around them, Hermione Granger decides to seduce fellow Order Member, Draco Malfoy, one night while at Grimmauld Place... and everything between them changes after that. Fic follows the "five times" trope, and is dedicated to raspberryjukebox. One-shot. A/U-Extended War scenario. Dramione. Drama-Romance-Hot Shag! COMPLETE! M, 1 Chapter, 3,251 Words
Good Girl by arabellaleyes: Hermione is tired of their normal routine in the bedroom. What will happen when she asks Draco to spice things up? One-shot. Complete. M, 1 Chapter, 9,000 Words
Hindsight by floorcoaster: It's a New Year and Hermione decides it's time to make some changes. T, 12 Chapters, 167,694 Words
How to Love Thy Neighbour by WhatSoMalfoy: After her relationship with Ron falls apart, Hermione attempts to juggle a personal muggle life with a professional wizarding one. After encountering her high school nemesis in the most unlikely place, Hermione adds another ball to the juggling mix. M, 14 Chapters, 41,992 Words
How to Move On by longdistance: It's been nearly a decade since the war. A long time since she locked herself away. A long time since he faced his mistakes. She's what he wants. He's what she needs. It's time for both of them to figure out how to move on. M, WIP
Hydrotherapy by eilonwy: Draco finds a trip to the showers after playing Quidditch... enlightening. E, 2 Chapters, 7,163 Words
I Choose You by melanoradrood: At the end of Fifth Year, Hermione finds out why It is that none have approached her with a Marital Contract, the only way she can remain in the Wizarding World after Graduation. It has already been signed by her Magical Guardian, someone she has never met - she is to be the next Lady Malfoy. A year and a half later, she is a married witch, but still, Draco Malfoy, who had chosen her above all others, had not spoken of it. In fact, they barely spoke at all. And when trouble heads their way, Hermione means to change that. Really, she means to change a lot of things. E, 5 Chapters, 24,527 Words
Isolation by Bex-chan: He can't leave the room. Her room. And it's all the Order's fault. Confined to a small space with only the Mudblood for company, something's going to give. Maybe his sanity. Maybe not. "There," she spat. "Now your Blood's filthy too!" DM/HG. PostHBP. Now complete with epilogue. M, 49 Chapters, 284,050 Words
It Happened in Egypt by bionically: Wandless in Egypt: Draco's stranded in Egypt, but luckily, there's a Granger in sight. Now, if only he could be prevented from strangling her. Fun times abroad: It was supposed to be a leisurely solo trip down the Nile. Hermione didn't factor in one blond man from her past and all his drama. Then, of course, there's the fact that everyone's after him. Much hilarity ensues. Maybe. *** A rom-com adventure/mystery featuring two unwilling partners on the run from Lucius Malfoy, alien-hunters, Muggle police, and local wizards engaged in a civil war. T, WIP
Love and Other Misfortunes by senlinyu: Draco Malfoy is dying. He's part-Veela and needs his mate to survive. Post-war, Hermione Granger is a workaholic, up to her eyeballs in legal activism on behalf of Magical Beings, and hasn't yet noticed that Malfoy is the Magical Being who needs her most. “Because I don’t want to be saved by you just because you feel like you have to.” He was properly furious now. “I’m in love with you." Hermione stared at him. She knew but somehow hearing him say it made the air shimmer with magic. "I’m in love with you,” he said again, despairingly. “And that means I want you to be as happy as you possibly can. And you won’t be, not with me.” M, 23 Chapters, 98,584 Words 
Manacled by senlinyu: Harry Potter is dead. In the aftermath of the war, in order to strengthen the might of the magical world, Voldemort enacts a repopulation effort. Hermione Granger has an Order secret, lost but hidden in her mind, so she is sent as an enslaved surrogate to the High Reeve until her mind can be cracked.Now illustrated by Avendell. E, 77 Chapters, 370,473 Words
Measure Of A Man by inadaze22: To truly know someone is to differentiate between who they once were, who they are now, and who they're capable of being. Hermione realises the duality of one man as she rectifies what she knows of the past and begins to understand the pieces of who Draco Malfoy is now: a father, a son, and a man. E, WIP
Meet the Malfoys by raven_maiden: 4 Works, 21, 442 Words
of flavoured names and coloured sounds by Pink Panda (Ejacyeolation): "He doesn’t question it at first, the fact that sounds have colours and words have flavours. He grows up with it, grows up seeing powerful ruptures of colour when his mother plays the piano and softer, translucent bursts when the people around him speak. His father’s voice fills his vision with sombre oranges and lilacs while his mother’s is a pleasant mix of delicate greens, blues, and greys. The word father tastes like wet wood and the word mother tastes like the pumpkin juice the house-elves frequently serve him."In which Draco just wants to know what colour Hermione's moans would be. He also wants to know if her skin would taste as sweet as her surname or maybe as intoxicating as her given name. E, 2 Chapters, 10,351
Once Upon a Night by longdistance: One night will change everything. M, 17 Chapters, 57,444 Words
One and Done by PacificRimbaud: Hermione Granger has a career she loves, friends she can depend on, and a nice set of hand towels for her new flat. She's single and tired of tiresome men, but that doesn't stop her from wearing beautiful lingerie underneath her serious Ministry skirts. Or having pictures taken in naughty knickers. Just once. For herself. Draco Malfoy doesn't get upset at the sight of blood, which is good, because he sees a lot of it. What he doesn't see a lot of is Hermione Granger in her unmentionables. Usually. A series of meetings and mix-ups in which one cannot possibly mean done. E, 4 Chapters, 35,011 Words
Our shared silence by Vofastudum: She wakes up one morning and everyone is just gone, vanished like they never existed at all. Everyone but Him. And in this silent solitude, he's all she has. Hermione and Draco alone in empty castle. Mystery and a plot twist you didn't see coming! EDITED 10/2020 M, 17 Chapters, 40,149 Words
Pinned by bionically: Draco doesn't know what he's expecting when he follows Blaise down a dark alley, but it certainly isn't this. For a man with an addictive personality, this isn't going to turn out well. Assigned trope: Voyeurism *** Or, a chance encounter with a frizzy-haired witch from his misbegotten past in the last place anyone should have expected to see her sets Draco's disordered life on its ear. The path to redemption is truly paved with unexpected surprises. E, 20 Chapters, 110,886 Words
Really Sell It by RoseHarperMaxwell: Draco's having a rough eighth year, and Hermione's going to make it better for him. "Well, it’s clear what needs to happen.” She gripped his chin, tilting his head to make sure she hadn’t missed any injuries, before looking straight into his eyes. “You’re my boyfriend now.” *Featuring fake dating, exhibitionism, and sex-positive Hermione Granger. Submission for Farewell to Summer: The 31 Flavors of Smut Fest. E, 1 Chapters, 7,612 Words
Remain Nameless by HeyJude19: How did it feel? It felt like he was barely holding it together. She, of all people, should shun him. Or yell at him. Curse him. Spit at him. Take out her wand and blast him off the face of the earth. It was crushing guilt and relief and confusion all at once when he looked at Hermione Granger. The monotony of Draco’s daily routine had become both a lifeline and a noose. But this new habit of grabbing coffee with Hermione Granger is quickly becoming a reason to get out of bed and is unfortunately forcing him to re-evaluate his inconsequential existence. Hermione is living her life in fragments, separate pieces scattered about, and she can’t find a way to step back and let the full picture form. Why are morning meetings with Draco Malfoy the only thing that make sense anymore? E, 51 Chapters, 312,315 Words
Remember Us As War (but call us forgiveness) by Anyaparadox: Following the devastation of the Battle of Hogwarts, The Wizarding Population Growth Act is put into effect. All witches and wizards will be matched with their most compatible partner. Failure to comply will not be tolerated. Survival is key. Hermione reminds herself of this. Survival. She can fix this, if only she can survive. The war has made this a task she is equipped for. Marrying Draco Malfoy will hardly be the worst thing she's ever endured. M, WIP
Ring A Ring O' Roses by Gallivant: Dark Magic, Dark Wizards and a mysterious and deadly Dark Flux, which, in the wrong hands, has the terrifying potential to mass-murder Muggles and Muggle-borns ... It’s been fourteen years since the end of the Second Wizarding War and the Wizarding World is settled, stable and seemingly safe… Hermione Weasley has it all: a loving family, a successful career - and happiness… of sorts. But a series of unexpected events is about to turn her life upside-down, threatening those she loves, fatally undermining the peace between worlds that has prevailed for centuries … changing life as she knows it, possibly forever. If working with Draco Malfoy was the last thing Hermione Weasley ever wanted, falling for your enemy was the least expected. A quest to thwart a magical weapon of mass destruction has devastating consequences. A race to save the world, becomes a race to save themselves… M, 65 Chapters, 527,141 Chapters
Set Fire to the Rain by HarleyQuinn1317: What happens when the one you're destined for is the last person you should ever be with... When the Ministry of Magic asks for volunteers for their Marriage Initiative, Hermione Granger must come to terms with the one terrible deed she committed during the Second Wizarding War. Can she find it in her heart to forgive herself and finally learn to let love in? E, WIP
Sex and Occlumency by Graendoll: Hermione didn't escape from the war unscathed, and when she finally decides on a solution to her problems she's left to explore it on her own. A chance encounter with Draco Malfoy sets her world on it's head and leads her down a path towards healing that she would never have anticipated. E, 18 Chapters, 65,079 Words
The Art of Seating Etiquette by inadaze22: Hermione believes that every problem has a solution, and that solution can be found in a book. That is, until Draco starts sitting to her right every Friday. She has no answers until help comes in the form of an unlikely source: Ron Weasley. E, 1 Chapter, 9,734 Words
The Auction by LovesBitca8: In the wake of the Dark Lord’s triumph over Harry Potter, the defeated must learn their new place. Hermione Granger, former Golden Girl, has been captured and reduced to human chattel. Sold to the highest bidder as the top prize at an auction of Order members and sympathizers, she is thrust into the rabid, waiting hands of the Death Eaters. But despite the horrors of Voldemort’s new world, help—and hope—seem to arise from the most unlikely of places. PART 3 of the RIGHTS AND WRONGS series. E, 41 Chapters, 325,702 Words
The Binding by Curly_Kay: “Okay, what we know so far.” Hermione listed, "One, our magic is drawing us together. Two, we can use each other’s wands. Three, there were actual sparks when you touched me."After an infant binding ritual magically joins Hermione and Draco to counteract the Black family blood curse, they must navigate the secret binding through their years together at Hogwarts. E, 35 Chapters, 175,451 Words
The Carnal Club by Ada_P_Rix: COMPLETE The Halloween Ball is fast approaching with Hermione at the helm.... What a delightful time to suddenly learn of a centuries old secret sex-game club that is currently ran by a Blonde haired Slytherin. Oh, and it only happens once a year every October, when the winner takes all at the Halloween Ball ...The First Rule of Carnal Club: You do not talk about Carnal Club. E, 8 Chapters, 43,306 Words
The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy by Speechwriter (batmansymbol): The night that Harry and Dumbledore return from the cave, the Death Eaters are delayed from reaching the top of the Astronomy Tower for one more minute. Draco Malfoy lowers his wand. A Deathly Hallows rewrite in which Draco accepts Dumbledore's offer to fake his death and go into hiding with the Order of the Phoenix. T, WIP
The Erised Effect by Ada_P_Rix: Hermione and Pansy work in a shop together. Draco, Harry, Theo and Blaise all work together at the Ministry. They all meet up every Friday at the pub to have drinks. Pansy has a new fantasy potion that she likes to call 'The Erised Effect' that she's keen to try out on willing participants ... Boys are so easy to manipulate when alcohol is involved .... E, 13 Chapters, 88,852 Words
The Fallout by everythursday: Hermione learns about growing up through the redemption of Draco Malfoy. E, 49 Chapters, 310,229 Words
The Figures of Figuring Out by Vofastudum: You were the biggest riddle in my life. You were the one I couldn't figure out. You were the only thing I couldn't find a pattern to. You were something I couldn't look up from any book. Unwritten, with no instructions. And I was used to finding solutions! Post-war eight-year secret romance. Edited 12/2020 M, 13 Chapters, 26,951 Words
The Flat in Bath by Ada_P_Rix: Loosely inspired by 365 Days...-- Malfoy grabbed her chin, forcing her to look directly at him. “Don’t you dare, Granger...” He told her roughly as his intense gaze bored into her own. “I fucking forbid you to come until I’ve had enough of you...” Draco caught her cheeks now between the fingers of his free hand and then snapped her head to the side and licked her earlobe, trailing down to her jawline. “...one flutter of those delicious walls of yours and you’re going to wish you never opened your legs for me.” -- __________________ Hermione is kidnapped during a raid and taken captive by someone who doesn't plan on 'torturing' her in the conventional way... E, WIP
The Gloriana Set by ThebeMoon: The War is won, and Hermione Granger is back at Hogwarts as an “Eighth Year”, feeling reckless and determined to shed her prim bookworm persona. She will do as she pleases, and anyone who doesn’t like it will see the business end of her wand. Also returning is Draco Malfoy, universally hated but determined to restore his family’s name. Hermione’s hopes for a quiet school year are quickly dashed as she contends with mischievous First Years, killer plants, enchanted hair accessories, a totally inappropriate Moaning Myrtle, renegade Death Eaters, a nice vampire, a poorly named study group, a depraved party, and mysterious, threatening blood messages on the castle walls. We have redemption, partial redemption and (sadly or hilariously) no redemption at all. Throw in a snarky, disturbingly attractive Draco with his own secret agenda, and we have a very slow-burn Dramione with a side of who-dun-it. COMPLETE! M, 81 Chapters, 271,830 Words
The Library of Alexandria by senlinyu: The Library of Alexandria is not for just any witch or wizard. Many bookworms may try but few are permitted to pass through its doors. The books residing there are ancient and powerful and, if one happens to make a mistake, the consequences can be rather—novel. E, 6 Chapters, 26,383 Words
The List by AureliaBlack90: After her divorce, Hermione decides to get out of town to recover from the pain of her lost relationship and the miscarriage she suffered a year previously. She arrives in the Cotswolds depressed and aimless but compiles a list of things to do that she hopes will help her get back on her feet. In the midst of her journey to find healing she keeps running into Draco Malfoy, who is nothing like she remembered him. He invites her into his world, and Hermione finds exactly what she was looking for - in the place she least expected it. E, 10 Chapters, 70,526 Words
The Manuscript by alexandra_emerson: Five 1/2 years after the war, in the middle of a big fight with Draco, Hermione finds a manuscript. It’s a retelling of her and Draco’s love story, written by him. She never realized how much he was struggling before she read his words. Snippet: I could spend my whole life apologizing to you Hermione, and it would never be enough. Post-war, angst-filled Dramione with a happy ending. M, 21 Chapters, 154,918 Words
The Memory of You by PotionChemist: Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger fell in love against all odds, but there was one big problem — he was already married. Pressured, Hermione does something she promised herself she would never do again and erases their affair from his memory. Completely devastated, she avoids seeing Draco or the Malfoys at all costs. But is their love too strong? Are they inevitable? What will happen if he finds out about their previous relationship? E, WIP
The Mountain and The Sea by AlexisDanaan: Hermione Granger was perfectly happy with her life, her job as a Healer Trainee, her ugly cat and her cute little house in the countryside. And then Draco Malfoy had to go and mess that all up, typical git. Post-Hogwarts, EWE, OOC, creature!fic. E, 12 Chapters, 40,441 Words
The Nietzsche Classes by Beringae: The Ministry takes action against the remaining prejudice in the wizarding society and asks Hermione for help. “What do you want? Money? Power? Name your price, Granger. I’m not about to let pride get in my way when an Azkaban sentence is on the line.” M, 15 Chapters, 45,807 Words
The Phoenix Potion by FedonCiadale: Twenty years after the battle of Hogwarts.... Harry is head auror and is worried about cases where Muggleborn children meet with accidents, Ron is a famous Quidditch keeper. Both haven't talked to Hermione for ages and certainly not to her husband, Draco Malfoy. Narcissa Malfoy struggles with a curse, and Neville and Luna try to stay friends with all. The key to solving the problems may lie in the past, a time nobody really wants to revisit and some can't. T, 111 Chapters, 237,745 Words
The Potioneers by omnenomnom: They need each other unfortunately. Hermione has tricked Draco under her tutelage, arrogant attitude and all. But she would be simple to think he would accept it quietly. They have both have secrets to hide, old wounds better left to fester, and a world full of mermaids, dragons, and magic to explore. T, 53 Chapters, 196,559 Words
The Pretense by Colubrina: Voldemort died, but the Death Eaters live on. Hermione Granger traded herself to Draco Malfoy in exchange for safe passage for core Order members. Now he's pretending to love her, Narcissa is pretending to believe that, and Hermione is walking a tightrope behind enemy lines as she figures out what is going on. Unfortunately, people fall off tightropes. (no non-con) T, 50 Chapters, 108,164 Words
The Right Thing To Do by LovesBitca8: Hermione felt the pounding in her ears again. She would see him for the first time since the Great Hall, gaunt and stricken at the Slytherin table with his mother clutching his arm. She hadn't meant to look for him. Not in the corridors, not beneath the white sheets of the fallen, not on the way to the Chamber of Secrets with Ron, but she was a stupid girl. E, 36 Chapters, 174,911 Words
The Seven Year Witch by TheLastLynx: A boy and a girl have been meeting – coincidentally – for seven summers. While they pretty much hate one another most of the year, for those secret summer moments, they manage to see each other in a different light. But will that be enough to bring them together? A Dramione story about growing up and changing perspective, told along - and in-between - the lines of canon. M, WIP
Thirty Times Lucky by galfoy: "Granger, I can't hire you on any longer," Draco said. Hermione stared at him. Losing her job might actually mean losing the War, and she had to bargain, but there was literally nothing she had that he would want. Or was there? M, 2 Chapters, 7,128 Words
Traditions by raven_maiden: She straddled him slowly, still biting her lip, her hands on his shoulders. He held her hips tightly as he stared up at her. “So beautiful,” he whispered, and she flushed prettily, like she always did from his compliments. “You never need to hide from me.” ** Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy fell in love during the war. One year later, they're heading home for the holidays so he can finally meet her parents. There's just one teeny little problem: her parents think they're both Muggles. E, 14 Chapters, 68,767 Words
Waifs and Strays by Kyonomiko: War leaves a lot of orphans in its wake. Hermione is one, by her own hand, and she struggles with the realities of her situation. When she finds an orphaned familiar, it seems meant to be, giving and receiving comfort helping to heal her fractured heart. Unfortunately, the animal is actually a wizard, and he has his own issues. M, 31 Chapters, 118,152 Words
What You Think Is Right by icepower55: Six years after the war, Hermione parents are dying and her marriage to Draco is crumbling. Nothing seems logical in her life anymore. Her healer tells her to start writing about it, so she does, as a way to figure things out, and remind herself along the way. Hell is proximity without intimacy -Dante's Inferno M, WIP
When the Bell Tolls by everythursday: As a Dark revival begins to rise four years after the war, Hermione Granger is placed on the assignment of putting an end to them – and her first task is to recruit the Ministry's best hope and last option in the form of Draco Malfoy. E, 20 Chapters, 148,033 Words
Wreck by JMilz: Serving as Minister for Magic, Hermione Granger is finally at the peak of her career. With a beautiful family, a successful book, and the public on her side, her life should be a fairytale. Unfortunately, there is trouble in paradise, and when Draco Malfoy pays her a visit, she begins recalling their history and questioning her marriage. The reality is: every relationship is hard. M, 53 Chapters, 187,992 Words
Thanks to every person who contributed (I hope I've mentioned everyone. If not, let me know. 😊): @certified-arsehole @fedonciadale kiwim22 @really-sad-devil-guy endless-musings @headfullofnargles @pinksunsets-world @rosseliz01 @dramioneden @all-consuming @elricsister @injailoutsoon12 reclusivebird @mariakov81 @notthatchhavi @mordanbooqs @haaatch @hpsassenach @ybaeby @farmgirl-in @coyg-81 @eiramrelyat metterschling-plus-two @a-maidens-fantasy @sansacat @vofastudum @lexayeon @1800-rewrite @aneiria-writes @anonymouslydramione 
It took much longer to compile this list than I thought it would. Hopefully, I didn’t skip anything. 🙈
Happy New Year. May it be better than the previous one and full of great Dramione fics and fanarts! 🥳🥳🥳
And here’s the 2019 list: https://dramioneficrecommendations.tumblr.com/post/190216354767/what-is-the-best-dramione-fic-you-read-in-2019
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autumnscribbles · 3 years
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cheap wine | b.s
requested by anon! (thank you i love this!!)
summary: y/n’s friend brad is jealous of her friendship with colby brock, leading to one night where he can’t keep it to himself anymore
word count: 1.8k
warnings: little bit of suggestive language, i wrote smut but it was really bad and i hated it so i adjusted LOL
a/n: i finally managed to write a long dish imagine!! i love me some jealous brad :) keep sending requests, i love them! i hope you enjoyed, i had fun wiring this one
                                                       ~
Brad sat on the couch across from you, eyes boring into Colby as he tickled you on the black couch of your apartment. You had invited some friends over for drinks, movies and board games, just wanting a chill night with your friends. It was a nice change of pace from the LA parties you both always ended up at.
Brad, hoever, was hoping that Colby wasn’t going to show up today. Of course, he did, being your best friend. Brad’s jealousy seemed to course through his veins, plastering on a fake grin every time your eyes managed to catch his. 
You squealed as Colby picked you up, throwing you over his shoulder as he ran around the room, your giggles and shrieks filling the room, everyone else laughing along except Brad. He wanted to be the one to get those laughs out of you, and he didn’t know why he suddenly cared so much.
He had seen you with Colby many times, assuming you had feelings for him, or that Colby had feelings for you. When he found out from a third party that it wasn’t in fact true, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of joy. He couldn’t exactly pinpoint when these feelings began, but now they were full throttle, and Brad had a difficult time ignoring them. Pretending they didn’t exist seemingly just wasn’t working anymore.
Brad stood up, asking Connor who was also invited if he wanted to go grab a drink. Connor agreed and both boys made their way to your kitchen, pouring themselves glasses of cheap wine from the bottles you had laid out across the kitchen island. Brad downed his fast, wanting to forget the feelings he had for you and the jealousy he felt watching you with Colby.
“Woah, mate,” Connor laughed. “You okay?”
Brad downed the drink, beginning to pour another one before answering Connor’s concerns.
“Fine,” he muttered.
“It’s y/n and Colby, isn't it?” Connor inquired, despite already knowing the answer to his question.
“No,” Brad lied. “She can do what she wants, I don’t own her. I just have a hard time believing that Colby doesn’t have feelings for her.”
“I don’t know,” Connor shrugged. “They are really good friends.”
“Whatever,” Brad shrugged. “I have no right to be jealous.”
Brad and Connor grabbed their wine glasses, heading back out to the living room, plopping back down on the couch. 
Your eyes caught his, quickly standing up to go sit next to him after realizing you hadn’t spoken much since he got here. Brad had been more quiet than usual, almost like he was avoiding you.
“Hey,” you smiled, leaning your head on his shoulder quickly.
“Hey,” he replied, putting a smile on.
“Already almost done?” you asked, eyeing his wine glass.
“Yeah,” Brad chuckled. “I guess I’m going a bit fast aren’t I?”
“Nonsense,” you guffawed, waving him off before taking his glass, offering to go refill it at the same time you were going to refill yours. 
As you made your way to the kitchen, Colby followed, skipping happily alongside you. You looked back at Brad, noticing the unhappy look on his face yet again, unsure where it was coming from. Colby noticed you staring, nudging you back to attention as you began pouring the wine into the glasses. Despite the fact that you could afford better alcohol, you liked to stick to your cheap wine, it always made you happy.
“What’s up?” Colby asked, realizing right away something was off in that moment.
“Nothing,” you shrugged. “Brad’s just acting weird.”
“A little, yeah,” Colby shrugged. “Probably because he’s into you.”
“He is not,” you protested, unable to hide the smile creeping onto your face.
“He totally is,” Colby insisted. “And you’re totally into him.”
“I’m not, Colby,” you said, pushing him lightly, making him stumble backwards slightly, already feeling a slight buzz.
Despite your protests, Colby was right. You had developed feelings for Brad. Everyone always assumed you liked Colby that way, but you didn’t. Ever since you met Brad, you found yourself always thinking about him, wondering what it would be like if you two were together. Sometimes you convinced yourself he had feelings for you too, but your tendency to overthink made you second guess it. He was hard to read, and you weren’t very good at reading people.
“Keep lying to yourself,” Colby said, clinking his glass against yours before sipping it.
You sighed, grabbing yours and Brad’s glass and heading back out to hand it to him, feeling yourself loosen up with each sip.
The night carried on, you pulling out the Twister mat for everyone to play. Everyone was already drunk enough that they were all excited about it, friendly competition already starting. After most people lasting a long time, it was just you and Colby left. Your friendship had consisted of many twister games, both of your competitive natures surging.
Brad watched as both of you got tangled in each other, his head foggy from the wine. He had lost track of how much he had already, but it was a lot, and he was starting to accept his thoughts of you rather than pushing them away.
Colby finally crashed to the floor, you screaming excitedly despite knowing all along you would win. You jumped up and down, pointing at Colby and jokingly calling him a loser.
“We get it,” he groaned. “You’re the best at twister.”
“We know,” you grinned, helping him up off the ground. “I’m gonna go pee now.”
You downed the rest of the wine in your glass, planning on refilling it after you went to the bathroom, heading down the hall towards it. Someone had turned up the music you had put on, a smile across your face as you thought about how much fun you were having.
In the other room, Brad had decided to go for what he wanted. He stood up, the wine heading straight to his head as he stumbled slightly, walking down the hall towards where the bathroom was, waiting outside of it for you. He looked back to make sure no one had followed him, but he was in the clear.
You dried your hands off, opening the door to find Brad standing in the dimly lit hallway, looking at you.
“Need to pee too?” you asked, motioning towards the bathroom.
“No,” he chuckled. “Just wanted to be alone with you for a second.”
“Oh yeah?” you asked, raising an eyebrow as you approached him, feeling confident.
“Yeah,” he smirked. “I haven't been able to keep my eyes off of you, and it’s really hard to keep my hands off of you too.”
Heat rushed to your cheeks, not expecting him to say that in the slightest. You had really thought Brad was upset with you or attempting to avoid you all night, maybe this was why.
“What’s stopping you?” you flirted back, taking yet another step closer, now able to feel Brad’s breath against your skin, his lips slightly stained from the red wine you had been drinking all evening.
“I’m not sure,” he mumbled, leaning in closer to you.
Both of you losing your inhibitions, you pressed your lips together desperately. It had been something you had both been thinking of for a long time, the satisfaction seeping through you as you felt his soft lips on yours. His hands reached for your waist, turning around so you were against the wall in the shadows of the corner of the hall, his lips moving hungrily, the kiss deepening.
You reached up, lacing your fingers through his hair, tugging slightly, earning a groan from Brad in return. His tongue teased your bottom lip, and you opened wider, your tongue touching his. He pulled away for a second, you breathing heavily as he moved to your neck, hands moving up and down your sides.
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to do this,” he muttered, the feel of his breath on your neck sending shivers down your spine. “I have a pretty good idea,” you blurted out.
“I’ve been thinking abut you all day, it was killing me seeing Colby all over you,” he said.
“I only want you,” you breathed out.
“Good,” Brad smirked before you pulled him back to your mouth, hungry for his kiss again. 
You put your hands on his chest, his firm muscles against your hands through the soft fabric of his shirt. You trailed down to his stomach, revealing in the feeling of his body. He did the same to you, hands trailing around you, landing on your ass as he gave it a slight squeeze.
You pulled him closer to you, wanting him even closer than he already was, wanting all of him. You felt his crotch against yours, smiling in the kiss about what you did him.
“I want you so bad,” he groaned.
You took his hand, leading him to your bedroom, kicking the door closed behind you. He set you down on the bed, climbing on top of you as you wrapped your arms back around him, drowning in the kiss and his body. He smelled of cologne and tasted like wine, it was intoxicating.
You reached for his pants, toying with the button when there was a knock on the door, startling both of you.
“Y/n?” Colby asked from the other side of the door. “Are you in there? Just wanna make sure you’re okay.”
“Yeah!” you blurted out as quickly as you could. “I’m fine I just wanted to change clothes.”
You facepalmed yourself after saying that, Brad laughing at you. Now you actually would have to change clothes to make it believable. Although, you assumed Colby had some idea about what was going on.
“Rain check?” Brad asked, despite how badly he wanted to go further.
“I guess so,” you sighed. “You can at least take me out for dinner first.”
“Of course, m’lady,” he chuckled. “How’s tomorrow sound?”
“Sounds lovely,” you grinned. “Now get out so I can change and we don’t look suspicious.”
“I think we already look suspicious, love, plus I want to see you without clothes on.”
You shoved him, letting out a laugh.
“You almost get some action and suddenly you’re so bold?” you ask.
“It's the cheap wine, babe,” he nodded. “It’s all about the cheap wine.”
You changed quickly, letting Brad stay in the room, kissing and fondling each other a little more. You wanted to go all the way, but your friends were all in the other room, and you were the host. You took his hand, leaving the room and shutting the door.
“Have fun?” Connor asked, eyeing both of your messed up hair, Brad’s pant button still undone.
“Oops,” you grinned, standing in front of him so he could button it up.
You sat on the couch next to each other, Brad’s hand brushing your thigh, still wanting to be as close to you as possible.
“Not a word,” you pointed at Colby, earning a laugh from everyone in the room.
You looked over at Brad, his soft brown eyes boring into yours. You knew this wasn’t just lust, and that maybe what you’ve always wanted was in the near future. 
Maybe he would be yours.
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mimicofmodes · 4 years
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“The Ladies Waldegrave” by Joshua Reynolds, 1780 (NGS NG2171)
I’ve complained before about two very big pet peeves of mine - corset stuff and Regency women being dressed in 1770s-1780s clothes - but one that may dwarf them because of how frequently it comes up in historical and fantasy fiction is the oppression of embroidery.
That’s probably putting it a bit too strongly. It’s more like ... the annoyance of embroidery. Every character worth reading about knows instinctively that sewing is a) boring, b) difficult, c) mindless, and d) pointless. The author doesn’t have to say anything more than “Belinda threw down her needlework and looked out the window, sighing,” to signal that this is an independent woman whose values align with the modern reader, who’s probably not really understood by her mother or mother figure, and who probably will find an extraordinary man to “match” her rather than settling for someone ordinary. To look at an example from fantasy, GRRM uses embroidery in the very beginning of A Game of Thrones to show that the Stark sister who dislikes it is sympathetic and interesting, while the Stark sister who is competent at it is boring and conventional and obviously not deserving of a PoV (until later books, when her attention gets turned to higher matters); further into the book, of course, the pro-needlework sister proves to be weak-willed and naïve.
Rozsika Parker, in the groundbreaking 1996 work The Subversive Stitch, noted that “embroidery has become indelibly associated with stereotypes of femininity,” which is the core of the issue. "Instead embroidery and a stereotype of femininity have become collapsed into one another, characterised as mindless, decorative and delicate; like the icing on the cake, good to look at, adding taste and status, but devoid of significant content.” 
Parker also points out that the stereotype isn’t just one that was invented in the present day by feminists who hated the idea of being forced to do a certain craft. “The association between women and embroidery, craft and femininity, has meant that writers concerned with the status of women have often turned their attention towards this tangled, puzzling relationship. Feminists who have scorned embroidery tend to blame it for whatever constraint on women's lives they are committed to combat. Thus, for example, eighteenth-century critical commentators held embroidery responsible for the ill health which was claimed as evidence of women's natural weakness and inferiority.”
There are two basic problems I have with the trope, beyond the issue of it being incredibly cliché:
First: needlework was not just busywork
A big part of what drives the stereotype is the impression that what women were embroidering was either a sampler:
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sampler embroidered by Jane Wilson, 14, in 1791 (MMA 2010.47)
or a picture:
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unfinished embroidery of David and Abigail, British, 1640s-50s (MMA 64.101.1325)
That is, something meant to hang on the wall for no real purpose.
These are forms of schoolwork, basically. Samplers were made by young girls up to their early teens, and needlework pictures were usually something done while at school or under a governess as a showpiece of what was being learned - not just the stitching itself, but also often watercolors (which could be worked into the design), artistic sensibility, and the literature, history, or art that might be alluded to. And many needlework pictures made in schools were also done as mourning pieces, sometimes blank, for future use, and sometimes to commemorate a recent death in the family. A lot of them are awkward, clearly just done to pass the class, but others are really artwork.
Many schools for middle- and upper-class girls taught the making of these objects (and other “ornamental” subjects) alongside a more rigorous curriculum - geography, Latin, chemistry, etc. At some, sewing was also always accompanied by serious reading and discussion. (And it would often be done while someone read aloud or made conversation later in life, too.)
Once done with their education, women generally didn’t bother with purely decorative work. Some things that fabric could be embroidered for included:
Jackets 
Bed coverings and bedcurtains
Collars and undersleeves 
Pelerines 
Neck handkerchiefs and sleeve ruffles 
Screens
Upholstery
Handkerchiefs
Purses, wallets, and reticules
Boxes
Book covers
Plus other articles of clothing like waistcoats, caps, slippers, gown hems, chemises, etc. Women’s magazines of the nineteenth century often gave patterns and alphabets for personal use.
(Not to mention late nineteenth century female artists who worked in embroidery, but that’s something else.)
You could purchase all of these pre-embroidered, but many, many women chose to do it themselves. There are a number of reasons why: maybe they wanted something to do, maybe they felt like they should be doing needlework for moral/gender reasons, maybe they couldn’t afford to buy anything - and maybe they enjoyed it or wanted to give something they made to a person they loved. That firescreen above was embroidered by Marie Antoinette, someone who had any number of other activities to choose from. It’s no different than people today who like to knit their own hats and gloves or bake their own bread, except that it was way more mainstream.
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embroidery patterns from Ackermann’s Repository in 1827 - they could be used on dresses, collars, handkerchiefs, etc.
Second: needlework wasn’t the only “useless” thing women were expected to do
Ignoring the bulk of point one for now and the value of embroidery - I mentioned “ornamental subjects” above. As many people know, young women of the upper and middle classes were expected to be “accomplished” in order to be seen as marriageable. This could include skills like embroidery, drawing, painting, singing, playing the piano (as well as other instruments, like the harp or the mandolin), speaking French (if not also Italian and/or German), as well as broader knowledge and abilities like being well-versed in music, literature, and poetry, dancing and walking gracefully, writing good letters in an elegant hand, and being able to read out loud expressively and smoothly.
This wasn’t a checklist. As the famous discussion in Pride and Prejudice shows, individuals could have different views on what actually made a woman accomplished:
“How I long to see her again! I never met with anybody who delighted me so much. Such a countenance, such manners! And so extremely accomplished for her age! Her performance on the pianoforte is exquisite.”
“It is amazing to me,” said Bingley, “how young ladies can have patience to be so very accomplished as they all are.”
“All young ladies accomplished! My dear Charles, what do you mean?”
“Yes, all of them, I think. They all paint tables, cover screens, and net purses. I scarcely know anyone who cannot do all this, and I am sure I never heard a young lady spoken of for the first time, without being informed that she was very accomplished.”
“Your list of the common extent of accomplishments,” said Darcy, “has too much truth. The word is applied to many a woman who deserves it no otherwise than by netting a purse or covering a screen. But I am very far from agreeing with you in your estimation of ladies in general. I cannot boast of knowing more than half-a-dozen, in the whole range of my acquaintance, that are really accomplished.”
“Nor I, I am sure,” said Miss Bingley.
“Then,” observed Elizabeth, “you must comprehend a great deal in your idea of an accomplished woman.”
“Yes, I do comprehend a great deal in it.”
“Oh! certainly,” cried his faithful assistant, “no one can be really esteemed accomplished who does not greatly surpass what is usually met with. A woman must have a thorough knowledge of music, singing, drawing, dancing, and the modern languages, to deserve the word; and besides all this, she must possess a certain something in her air and manner of walking, the tone of her voice, her address and expressions, or the word will be but half-deserved.”
“All this she must possess,” added Darcy, “and to all this she must yet add something more substantial, in the improvement of her mind by extensive reading.”
Mr. Bingley feels that a woman is accomplished if she has the ability to do a number of different arts and crafts. Miss Bingley feels (or says she feels) that it goes beyond specific skills and into branches of artistic attainment, plus broader personal qualities that could be imparted by well-bred governesses or mothers. And Mr. Darcy, of course, agrees with that but adds an academic angle as well.
But what ties all of these accomplishments together is their lack of value on the labor market. A woman could earn a living with any one accomplishment, if she worked hard enough at it to become a professional, but young ladies weren’t supposed to be professional-level good because they by definition weren’t going to earn a living. All together, they trained a woman for the social and domestic role of a married woman of the upper middle or upper class, or, if she couldn’t get married, a governess or teacher who would share her accomplishments with the next generation.
(To be fair, almost none of the trappings of an upper-middle/upper class male education had anything to do with the kind of career training that college frequently is today, either. Men were educated to know the cultural touchpoints of their class and fit in with their peers.)
There are reasons that an individual person/character might specifically object to embroidery, but it was far from the only “useless” thing that an unconventional heroine would be required to do against her inclination by her conventional mother/grandmother/aunt/chaperone. Embroidery stands out to modern audiences because most of the other accomplishments are now valued as gender-neutral arts and skills.
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“The Embroidery Frame”, by Mathilde Weil, ca. 1900 (LOC 98501309)
So, some thoughts for writers of historical fiction (or fantasy that’s supposed to be just like the 19th/18th/17th/etc century):
- If your heroine doesn’t like embroidery, she probably doesn’t like a number of other things she’s expected to do. Don’t pull out embroidery as either more expected or more onerous than them. Does she hate to sit still? I’d imagine she also dislikes drawing and practicing the piano. Would she prefer to do academic subjects? She probably also resents learning French instead of Latin, and music and dancing. Does she hate enforced femininity? Then she’d most likely have a problem with all of the accomplishments.
- If your heroine just and specifically doesn’t like embroidery, try to show in the narrative that that’s not because it’s objectively bad, and only able to be liked by the boring. Have another sympathetic character do it while talking to the heroine. Note that the hero carries a flame-stitched wallet that’s his sister’s work. Emphasize the heroine’s emotional connection to her deceased or absent mother through her affection for clothing or upholstery that her mother embroidered - or through a mourning picture commemorating her. There are all kinds of things you can do to show that it’s a personal preference rather than a stupid craft that doesn’t take talent and skill!
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mourning picture for Daniel Goodman, probably embroidered by a Miss Goodman, 1803 (MMA 56.66)
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randomshyperson · 4 years
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Wanda Maximoff x Reader - Road to Healing
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Gif is not mine.
Summary: The one where you and Wanda travel around the country while grieving together. / Inspired by road trip-themed movies.
Read Complete work on AO3 too.
Warnings> Explicit language (cursing) , mentions of death, grieve and panic attacks. Mainly fluff and sad.
Words:  4.299K (Oneshot)
When Thanos won, you didn't have time to grieve. Immediately on the battlefield, you were responsible for helping to heal the wounded. And you were exhausted when it was over.
And then S.H.I.E.L.D. was triggered, and you knew they would take Vision if they found him. You thought Wanda wouldn't want that. And you ignored the intense pain you felt at the thought of her, and repeated to yourself that you wouldn't want that either. So you used Tony's technology to bring Vision's body back to the Avengers compound. And then you told them that Thanos had destroyed him along with the jewel, and that's what they wrote in their reports.
When you finally returned home, you only slept after you had organized a memorial for him. You didn't ask your colleagues to participate. The remaining avengers just seemed empty. So you left them alone.
Your hands trembled when you touched the knob of Wanda's room. You were looking for a picture of Vis. You found it eventually. When you left the room, your shirt was wet with your tears.
You thought Vision would like a view of the sea. So you left his body in a black wooden coffin, and buried it on the edge of the hill a few meters from the exit of the complex. You figured that Vision wasn't religious, so you just used the 3D printer to create a little iron plate, and stuck it against the ground. 
You could not sleep that night. And the next. When you finally did, your panic attacks started. But the emergency calls started coming in, and you knew you had no time for grief. The world needed you now.
You learned to deal with the panic, but the nightmares continued. So you accepted more assignments, until you were too exhausted to dream. And then you got used to it. 
And like the snap of a finger, five years passed. 
When you defeated Thanos, you fell to your knees. You couldn't find Natasha. And then you couldn't breathe. You realize what was happening, you knew they were back. But you can't go through this again. Because the world needs you again. And then you calm down, and you stand up. And then you are walking.
Steve doesn't come back. You think you hear Bucky crying in his room. But you don't say anything, because he doesn't like to talk about it. 
You take Wanda to the tomb of Vision two days before Tony's funeral. She sobs against you as you hug her, your own tears preventing you from seeing your surroundings clearly. You haven't left her side since.
After Tony's funeral is over, you destroy the items in your room with a bat. When you fall to the ground, Wanda sits beside you quietly, and holds your hand. She doesn't mind you shouting Nat's name along with your sobs.
- I can't stay here anymore. - You tell her the next night, while you are in your room. - I can't breathe in this place. - You confess with tears on your face. - I feel like I'm going to die. 
Wanda intertwines your hands. 
- Let's leave then.
You let out a long sigh, trying to control your tears. And then you nod.
Your mood improves considerably once you are out of the compound. You don't think about Nat, or Tony, or Steve, because if you do, your hands start to shake. But you think about healing. You think about being there for your best friend. 
And then you decide to live. And you hold both of Wanda's hands when you tell her that you are going to travel. Travel to all the places she hasn't visited in the United States.
You want to remember that there are still things to live for. You want Nat to be proud of you.
When Wanda nods in agreement, you smile, and hug her. And then you get a truck, and you let Wanda hold the map.
It is hot and humid, and you drum your fingers against the steering wheel, humming softly the pop song playing on the radio.
Wanda fell asleep against the passenger seat some time ago, and it has been a few hours since you left the small motel where you were staying after leaving the Avengers compound.
You are hungry, so you stop the car at the first dinner you find. The loss of movement of the vehicle awakens Wanda.
- Hey sleepyhead. - You joke as you take out your key, and look for your wallet in the glove compartment. - Let's go get something to eat.
You walk to the diner, which is practically empty. Wanda doesn't seem to be fully awake yet, but smiles at you when she catches you looking. You sit down on opposite sides of the table.
- I'll have the eggs and bacon, and pancakes, please. - You tell the waitress, and Wanda gives you a curious look. She orders cereal and chocolate waffles.
- Why are we having breakfast for dinner? - she asks with a smile.
You shrug, laughing lightly.
- It's always time for pancakes.
Wanda looks at you for a moment, and you look back. And then you are having a blinking contest. The waitress gives you a judgmental look when she interrupts the game, but you and Wanda smile and thank her for the food.
You finish eating first, and are distracted by one of the crossword puzzle magazines that the restaurant leaves under the tables. 
- Hey, Wands, help me with this one. - You say slightly distracted as you run your pencil across the paper. - "One word. Destined for belonging. Companionship. Devotion" Do you have any idea what it is?
- Soulmates. - Wanda says before chewing another piece of waffle. You let out a contented exclamation when the word fits, and smile at her, who just winks at you, smiling back.
- Does this taste good? - you ask, watching her eat. She nods, pushing her plate toward you. Wanda hands you her own fork to taste the waffles. They are very good, but you don't want to eat any more.
You can't finish your crossword puzzle, and you return the magazine to the table compartment before you leave the restaurant.
And then it is Wanda's turn to drive. You sit in the passenger seat, and turn up the radio as you get back on the road. You wish you could stay awake at night to keep Wanda company, but it only takes four songs for you to fall asleep. 
It is morning when you arrive in Virgina. And it is cold enough for you to wrap Wanda in a scarf when she refuses to warm up properly. She just laughs with flushed cheeks when you let her go. You rent a room with two beds, and after you shower, Wanda goes into the bathroom.
You are browsing through the channels when she comes back with a towel wrapped in her hair, she smells good even from a distance.
- Do you want to go out to eat, or do you want to order a pizza? - you ask.
- Pizza. - She replies as she lies down on the bed.
You need to go out and look for a pay phone, because both of your cell phones are off and in the bottom of one of the boxes you are carrying in the truck.
- Shall we watch a movie? - she asks when you come back into the room. 
- Comedy or horror? - You counter with a question as you kick off your shoes. Wanda bites her lip thoughtfully.
- Both.
You smile as you hang your coat on the door.
You have been watching "Scary Movie" for twenty minutes when the pizza arrives. Wanda pauses the movie while you stand up and pay the delivery man.
She uses her powers to drag the coffee table into the space between the two beds, and you place the pizza on top of the wood and sit cross-legged on Wanda's bed.
Eventually, you finish the pizza and wipe your hands with napkins. And then Wanda lets the movie sequence continue, and you remain in her bed with the excuse that it was cold. You fall asleep at the end of the second film, but you wake up in the early morning hours with Wanda's hand against your waist. You don't think you should get used to the feeling, so you get up and go back to your bed.
Wanda cries when you arrive in Virginia Beach. You know it is the view of the sea, which reminded her of the tomb of Vision. You stand silently beside her as you entwine your hands. Wanda doesn't let go until you get back to the car.
It's cold, and you shouldn't have ice cream. But you do it anyway. You and Wanda stop at a drive-thru, and have your milkshakes while you drive toward Tennessee.
You let her have the rest of your ice cream even though she's had many tastes already.
On one of the roads, you stop the car on the roadside. You try to normalize your breathing. 
- I'm here. - She says next to you in a gentle voice, as she lets you squeeze her hand over your lap. - You are safe. 
You exchange directions for a while. 
- So you have never been to Disney? - You ask between one lighthouse and another, somewhere in North Carolina.
Wanda denies it with a smile and a nod. She has only one hand on the wheel, and her hair is shining in the sun. You scold yourself for looking.
- Since we can't afford Disney, we should pick something cheap to do - You tell her while looking at one of the tour guides you found at the motel.
- I don't mind just driving around. - she says. You bite the smile from your lips.
- Yeah, me neither.
It takes two weeks for you to talk about Natasha. You have changed routes many times now, and then you sit in the back of the truck, and look at the stars. And Wanda asks you about your nightmares. You say that you dream that Nat is falling, and that you can never reach her. You fall asleep together in the back of the car, many blankets wrapped around you.
When you wake up holding each other, neither of you really minds.
You are near Chicago when you drag Wanda to an arcade in the late afternoon. 
You and Wanda try out all the toys that are allowed for you. It's fun, and loud. And you laugh so hard your cheeks hurt.
And then you eat hamburger and fries with soda sitting in a parking lot. You push Wanda's shoulder lightly with yours when she steals one of your fries.
You are in a clothing bazaar when you see Wanda's breasts for the first time. In between trying on various strange outfits for fun, the fifth or sixth time you return to the changing room, Wanda pulls you into the cabin with her. And she smiles so much that you hardly notice them. 
When you get back to the motel, you bathe first. You touch yourself in the shower without really thinking about anything, but when you cum, the image of her breasts are in your mind.
In Michigan you bet on a race. And Wanda absolutely beats you. She has flushed cheeks and a sweaty face when you catch up with her. You think it's unfair that she looks so beautiful.
You watch the sunset, and Wanda thinks she has seen an owl. 
Your body begins to betray you when Wanda hugs you and you tremble. You decide that it is because you have been a long time without touching another person intimately and being touched in the same way. 
You joke with Wanda that you need to find a one-night stand, and she doesn't smile when she agrees with you.
As you drive towards Kansas, a waitress flirts with you. Wanda gets back in the car saying that she is tired, and you don't understand why kissing the waitress against a wall while she has one hand down your pants doesn't satisfy you.
You talk about death in Springfield. You are sharing popcorn while wrapped in a blanket sitting on the grass a few feet from the truck. 
- You can't die. - She declares suddenly and you raise your eyebrows in surprise.
- Wanda...?
- I won't... I won't survive.
You turned around quickly, and held up both your hands. 
- I wouldn't like that. - You tell her. You know it's what she doesn't want to hear, but you need her to understand that. - I would never want your life to depend on mine. 
Wanda sobs, lowering her head.
- I wish you would move on. - You nod to reaffirm her statement, your own face wet with tears. - I know... people expect me to say that I wish you would miss me, or not replace me. But I don't feel that way. - You confess. - I never want to be the reason for your unhappiness. If I die, and well, at some point I will, I want you to go on living. And enjoying it.
Wanda shakes her head, and jumps on your neck. She cries against your collarbone, but it's okay. You think she understood what you told her.
When she calms down, you are silent for several moments. 
- What will you do if I die? - she asks, looking at you. You keep your gaze on the stars as you shrug;
- I would die too.
Wanda bites back a smile on her lips, and hugs you. 
Bucky calls. You talk for five minutes. And then you text him that when he is ready you will be there to listen to him. You send a picture of you and Wanda, and when he calls again, you talk for five hours.
It takes four weeks since you left the compound to realize that you are in love with Wanda.
You are in a motel somewhere in Nebraska, and she is combing her hair in front of the television, a sitcom playing. And then she laughs, and you realize.
The realization doesn't surprise you though. You take a deep breath, and tell her you're going to get some air before you leave. 
You lean back on the balcony, trying to push the guilt away. You can hardly believe it happened so fast and so intensely.
You decide that everything is too recent, and that it would be disrespectful to Wanda's grief, so you guard yourself.
You fight for the first time in Colorado. You are being stubborn and rude, and Wanda is being distant and judgmental. And then you are arguing about the next destination. And then you stop the car on the roadside, and Wanda says she's not going anywhere with you. And you are silent for forty minutes before you two start to cry. 
You put your face against the steering wheel, and Wanda lifts her legs onto the seat and buries her face in her own arms. 
It takes a long moment for you to calm down. And then you wipe away your tears and Wanda looks away into the window, and you drive away again.
You are staying in Utah for a few days. It is the first time you ask for separate rooms. You want to cry again, but you just take the key. 
And then you can't sleep after four hours as you stare at the ceiling. 
You get up, and go out onto the veranda. And your feet guide you to the next door. But before you can knock, Wanda opens it, and jumps into you, hugging you tight. Your body instantly relaxes, and you cry as you both apologize, and promise never to fight again.
You get drunk in Las Vegas. Really drunk. You don't remember ever laughing as hard as you did that night. You think Wanda used her powers to win the games, but you can't prove it. And then you're back in the truck, stumbling and laughing, and she has a look on her face that makes your stomach turn with nervousness.
But you swallow your nervousness with a smile, and accept the bottle of vodka she offers you. And then you are in a karaoke bar, singing at the top of your lungs for two hours into the early morning hours. When the owner kicks you out, Wanda holds your hand as you both run around town. 
Back at the motel, you are laughing about something you can't remember, and then you fall into bed together, and instantly fall asleep.
When you wake up, you don't care about your headache.
You get the same tattoo in Las Vegas. Wanda holds and squeezes your hand while you are doing it, and you do the same to her. The tattoo artist thought you were married, and neither of you corrects him.
And then you take her to all the tourist spots, and you have ice cream and hot dogs. And Wanda's hand is warm against yours all the way.
On your last day in LA, you visit a nightclub. It is noisy, and lively, and has lots of alcohol. You find it hard to breathe when you see Wanda in a party dress, but she smiles and you follow her.
And then you dance and dance and dance, and you think about nothing. And then you're drunk again, and the girl at the bar is flirting with you. And Wanda's no longer smiling when she gets back on the dance floor. 
You think the girl at the bar has asked for your number, but you're looking at Wanda dancing. And she moves her body with sensuality, and then there is a man behind her. Wanda kisses him while looking at you through the lights. 
You take a shot of whiskey before leaving in a rage.
And when Wanda wakes up in the morning, she says she doesn't remember anything.
You think that you can no longer hide what you feel when you are on the road, heading for Oregon. But you just keep mumbling the song that plays on the radio.
Wanda bites her lip and has a lost look on her face, but when you ask her what's wrong, she looks away quickly as she says she was just distracted. 
You are entertained by the music again.
You get used to your feelings in Portland. The routine helps you keep them quiet and buried deep in your chest. 
You and Wanda begin to spend more time in inns, and camping, than on the road, but you still travel around the country. 
And then Wanda talks about Vision for the first time. How important he had been, how much she missed him. You listen, and she asks about Nat. And you say that it is exactly the same way. 
Neither of you cries anymore at the mention of their names.
It doesn't take long before the world needs you again. Sam calls. Stephen calls. You and Wanda throw your cell phones off a cliff, while toasting a lemonade.
- We are terrible superheroes, aren't we? - you ask looking at the horizon.
- The worst. - She replies before pouring her drink into her mouth.
You get your numbers back the same day by going to an electronics store.
And then you have to go back to New York.
Four hours down the road, and you both stop for a bite to eat in Cleveland, at a diner very similar to the one at your first stop.
Wanda walks ahead of you, hugging her own sweatshirt as she feels the late afternoon chill. You resist the urge to hug her.
- I'll have the waffles with chocolate and cereal. - You ask the waitress. Wanda stares at the menu for a few more seconds, biting her lower lip before speaking.
- I'll have the eggs and bacon with pancakes. - She asks right away.
You are silent for a moment, exchanging glances and quick smiles. And then the waitress returns with your plates.
- Are you ready to save the world again, Wandy? - you ask with a light irony in your voice before tasting your ceral.
Wanda smiles.
- Of course, of course. - She answers with humor. But her expression slowly falls, as if she is remembering something. You look at her with curiosity and concern.
- Are you all right?
- I just... - She begins. And then she straightens her posture, and diverts her eyes from yours. - What happens next? - You frown uncomprehendingly. Wanda looks unsure. - After we finish the job. This ends too?
You swallow dryly, feeling embarrassed and nervous. But you do your best to avoid showing it.
- Do you want it to end? - You ask.
- No. - She confesses as she looks into your eyes.- I'd like us to continue together.
- I'm not going anywhere, Wanda.  - You assure her with a smile. And then you bite the inside of your cheek, feeling anxious. - Don't you... don't you wish you had a fixed place to stay?
Wanda blinks in confusion, looking surprised at your question.
- I just... I love the road and all. Mostly because you're with me. - You say, and don't notice her blush at the last sentence. - But I'd like to have a house. Especially now that we're going back to work. I wouldn't mind living in New York.
- Are you inviting me to move in with you? - Wanda asks with a mixture of curiosity and embarrassment, and you feel your face heat up.
- Yes, I ... I'd like that. - You say, and seeing Wanda's surprised expression, you hasten to add. - But I understand if you just want the road! That's fine, I'll stand by you too!
Wanda reaches your hand quickly over the table, and she has a huge smile on her lips.
- I would love to live with you.
- Oh. - You sigh ruefully, feeling as if a weight has been lifted from your back. - Cool.
- Cool. - Wanda repeats with a mischievous smile and a twinkle in her eye.
And then you go back to eating in silence.
You are in the passenger seat while Wanda hums a song along to the noise of the radio. It is dark and she is waiting for the first motel she can find to park. And you look at her, looking so good, and comfortable, and happy. And your brain is screaming how much you love her in an endless loop, while your heart threatens to explode in your chest.
So you think you'd better face the landscape because you're getting out of breath. But then Wanda is parking the car on the roadside, and you think maybe she's going to pee, but then she doesn't come out. You turn and find her gripping the steering wheel with both hands as she looks ahead.
- Hey, what happened? - you ask worriedly. Wanda closes her eyes.
- I read your mind.
The confession shocks you immediately. 
- W-what? - You retort with a trembling voice.
Wanda opens her eyes, and lets go of the steering wheel. And she has a tender expression to calm you down.
- Hey, it's okay, I...
- No.
You mumble breathlessly, holding back tears, as you quickly unbuckle your seat belt and get out of the car.
You think you finally blew it. Wanda knew, and this was the end. 
Leaning against the car, you hugged your arms as you tried to calm your breathing with your eyes closed. You were startled when Wanda touched your shoulders, not even having heard her get out of the car.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - You cried when she hugged you. Your body was shaking. - I tried to avoid it. I'm sorry.
- Stop saying that. - She asked softly, letting her hands caress your back to calm you down. - You didn't do anything wrong. - She tries to say it, but you hold her tight, afraid she'll be gone at any moment. - Hey, look at me.
Wanda asks a few more times before you let go, trying to control your tears. Only when you look at her do you realize that she too has a crying face.
- I don't want to lose you. - You whimper. - I'll control myself, I can send them away. And everything will go back to the way it was before.
Wanda denies it with her head, raising her hands to your face. You think she's going to say you both can't do this anymore, and your stomach flips.
- I love you. - She confesses, looking up at you. - I love you. - She repeats as she wipes your tears with her fingers. You're too shocked to react. - I love you so much.
And then Wanda kisses you. And you stumble with fright, but the car behind you won't let you move away from her body. And then your eyes close, and you surrender. A long sigh escapes your lips as you feel Wanda's tongue on yours.
And you kiss until you are breathless. And then your body is warm, trembling, and Wanda kisses you again, and again, as she presses you against the car. 
And then you don't want to be dressed anymore, as Wanda lets her hands run all over you. 
You don't separate your mouths as you fall into the back seat, Wanda on top moaning into your mouth. 
The glass of the car is fogged as your hand slips on the window, trembling at Wanda's intimate touch, and delighting in the sounds she makes when you kiss her in all the right places.
You are happy. Fucking delighted. And you didn't want to keep driving, not unless it was to a house that was going to be yours and Wanda's. But Stephen and Sam were calling, saying that you were taking too long. Then you drove back to New York, and this time, Wanda's hand was entwined in yours.
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matbaerzal · 3 years
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Like This Pt.1 | T. Jost
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Summary: Tyson is the best roommate you could ask for, you can't imagine ever living with someone else... no- no not like that, your relationship is purely platonic! > (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) A/N: First fic of the year hafsjkhf.... The reader studies Special Education, which will play a small part throughout this fic. Warnings: A short mention of sexual dreams Reader pronouns: she/her Words: 2,4K Tagging: @konecny-s @vitekvanecek @idontgiveaflyinggrayson69 @ricohenrique @notaccurateornice @tysojost @justjosty ... lmk if you want to be tagged ❤️
As you reach the door to your apartment you shift your second grocery bag into your left hand before fishing your keys out of your pocket. You hurry to turn the key in your lock as your arms are tired from the heavy weight of the amount of food you’d bought. You huff out as you open the door, absent-mindedly throwing the keys on the side table as you set the groceries down on the floor.
“I’m sorry, can you give me a minute?” you hear Tyson speak as you take off your coat and shoes. In the corner of your eye, you see him put his phone down before pushing his chair back, standing up, and walking over.
“Hey, how was work?”
You huff out a breath in reply, and when you see him grab the groceries you almost try to object, but relief washes over you before you can. You follow him to the kitchen with the intent to sort the food so he can get back to what he was doing, but he brushes you away.
“Go sit down - relax” he gives you a pointed look.
“Thanks” you smile, hesitantly making your way to the couch.
“You hungry?” he speaks over his shoulder as you sit down.
“Very” your stomach grumbles as if on cue.
“I made some dinner earlier, want me to heat it up for you?”
“Don’t you have an interview” you shout back.
“Eh, they can wait” he shrugs
Without waiting for you to reply he takes out the tupperware from the fridge before putting it in the microwave. Once it’s heated up he brings it over to you, along with a glass of water before he gets back to his interview, apologizing profusely to the journalist on the other end of the call for keeping them waiting.
Living with Tyson had its ups and downs, but all in all the two of you fit together well as roommates. You’d met him during his first year in Colorado, back then you were living on campus. You’d planned to move in with a friend of yours, but after she graduated she got a job offer in another state and decided to move, leaving you practically homeless as there was no way you’d be able to afford to live on your own at the time - and there was no chance that you were ever moving in with your dorm room roommate again. Tyson offered for you to stay with him for at least a little bit until you figured things out. Then he realized he really liked having you around. You’d hesitated, thinking he was just trying to be nice, before he practically begged you to stay.
Hundreds of comments from friends asking if you’re dating or having sex later, you’re still living with him - not dating, not having sex, never even having kissed, and neither of you wanted to cross that line. With the way you and Tyson clicked, there were a lot of people who had trouble believing you were just friends, but at this point, you felt like you knew each other too well. All your dirty laundry had been aired out between the two of you - both literally and figuratively. The smell of his week-old workout sweat in the laundry room was enough to put you off. It wouldn’t be fair to say it hadn’t crossed your mind though. Objectively he is very attractive - you can’t deny that - perhaps, maybe your mind traveled places as he walked out of the bathroom after a shower with only a towel wrapped around him. You knew for a fact that he’d thought about you too, having drunkenly admitted to you that he had a dream about you once - which explained that one morning where he wouldn’t meet your eye and couldn’t have gotten out of the door quicker.
But neither of you ever acted on your attraction, it was pushed into the back of your minds - ignored completely. Because that’s all it was, an attraction, and nothing more.
You watch him as he continues his interview, zoning out as you eat your food. You hear every tone of his voice, completely focused on him but at the same time not registering a single thing he’s saying. It’s only when he looks over at you that you’re shaken out of it.
“Is it alright?” he whispers, covering the microphone.
You shake your head as you're brought back to the real world, it takes your brain a few seconds to catch what he said and your cheeks feel warm as he chuckles - “Hm?”
“The food? Is it alright?”
“Mm, yeah” you take another bite, resting the fork in the food container as you reach for the TV remote to distract yourself.
You’d been swamped with work lately, between your studies and your part-time job as a teaching assistant, you barely had time to take a breather. Your third year studying Special Education at the University of Denver was hectic, any time not spent at work or on campus or studying at home was spent either eating or sleeping in your bed. Tyson could see how tired you were whenever you came home, he always cooked a little extra for his dinner so you wouldn’t go to bed without eating first. His mediocre pasta meals always tasted like heaven after the long days you had.
By the time Tyson plops down on the couch you’re finished eating and zoned out on an episode of New Girl.
“Do you have any plans on Sunday?” he asks and you shake your head - “just studying, writing”.
“Wanna come to the game? I completely get it if you just want to stay in-”
“Are you kidding? I’d love to” you perk up, you hadn’t been to a game in who knows how long and you’d put aside your assignments at least for a little while if Tyson ever asked you to. He never had to ask before, you’d come whenever you had time, but it’d been seven weeks now - Tyson kept count.
“You sure?”
“Yes, Tys, really” you pat his thigh - keeping your hand there a touch longer before removing it when you meet his soft eyes.
--
You wake up late on Sunday, head stuck to the pillow, body hesitant to leave the bed. You’d already woken up once and decided to sleep longer so you force yourself out of bed, put some clothes on and go to the kitchen to grab a bowl of cereal. Just as you get the milk from the fridge your apartment door opens, signaling that Tyson’s home from his morning skate.
“Good morning” he smirks at you, his eyes running over your thrown-together outfit and noting the remnant of sleep in your eyes.
You nod, trying to speak through the mouthful you just took, making Tyson squint his eyes in a laugh. He waits patiently for you to finish so you can repeat your question to him - “how was the skate?”
“It was alright, easily gonna have a nap after I eat though”
“Want some cereal?” you arch your brow. He stops and thinks for a second, contemplating if he should say yes, or make his usual scrambled eggs - “you know what? Yeah” he decides. You raise your brows at him, about to make a comment but he interrupts you. “Yeah, yeah pour me a bowl before I change my mind”.
You hold your hands up - “wasn’t gonna say anything” you try, but he doesn’t look convinced. You rush to get him a bowl and a spoon, setting them down for him, pouring in some cereal as he comes over to sit next to you on your kitchen island. He pours the milk himself before lifting the bowl to clink against yours, muttering “cheers” before taking a spoonful into his mouth.
You sit in comfortable silence as you eat your food, moving around each other as you put the bowls in the sink to worry about later. You walk to the couch and open your laptop to get some work done before you have to get ready for the game.
“Do you ever take a break?” Tyson yawns, laying down on the couch next to you, his head landing on a pillow close by your thighs.
You figure his questions rhetorical, but his eyes stay on you as you start typing away on your essay. “I’m taking a break later, y’know, at the game”
“No, I mean like a real break, like flat out on the couch, books closed-”
“You’re funny”
“I’m serious”
“Yeah, well, I don’t have time for breaks Tys”
He goes quiet after that, a thoughtful look on his face as he settles into the couch, your eyes linger on him for a moment before you go back to writing your essay. It doesn’t take long for his breath to get heavy, the small snores escaping him making you smile. As you skim through an article you might use for your essay your free hand finds his hair - his curls too soft to resist running your hand through. His snoring stops as your hand first makes contact making you freeze, but he’s nuzzling into the pillow and snoring again before you know it.
Even after you’ve read the article your hand stays in his hair and you do your best to type with one hand, only opting to use your right hand when absolutely necessary. You were in tweaking stages so luckily you could keep one hand planted in his hair most of the time. You’re checking the clock here and there, knowing he didn’t set an alarm and that he didn’t like napping too long on game days, but just as you’re about to wake him he leans into your touch, eyes slowly blinking open as he hums, absentmindedly you brush his hair away from his forehead - “sleep well?”
“Like a baby” he smiles, “what time is it?”
“uh, two-thirty” you glance over at the little clock on your computer.
He leans into your hand one more time as if to savor the feel before he starts to get up, once on his feet he stretches his arms above his head, you can’t help but look as his t-shirt lifts to reveal his stomach, but you avert your eyes quickly and hope he doesn’t notice. If he did, he doesn’t comment, “want me to make dinner for you too?” he throws the words your way over his shoulder as he makes his way to the kitchen. “What’s on the menu?” you tease, fully well knowing the answer, even saying it with him once he replies - “chicken and pasta”.
You turn your head to look at him, and he can’t bring himself to be annoyed at you when you smirk at him.
“Yeah, yeah” he brushes you off - “do you want some or no?”
“Yes, please” you smile.
He quickly makes the food, the recipe burned into his brain from making it time after time. He puts a little extra cheese on your plate, coming over to the couch with both plates once he’s done. You close your computer, place it to the side, and take the plate he hands to you with ease. Once your plates are scraped it’s time for Tyson to get ready, change into his suit and leave for the arena.
He walks out of his room wearing one of his three-piece suits and if you didn’t have the restraint you’d built up over the time you’d lived with him you’re sure you would’ve drooled at the sight. You’d think he was doing it on purpose, but you’d never let your weakness for the vest-jacket pairing slip, and he looks oblivious as he meets your eyes. The little spin he does for you does nothing to help and you have to give yourself credit for being so collected when he raises his brows as if to ask: “Is this alright?”.
“Looking good, Tys. I’ll see you after the game” you get off the couch as you speak and give him a quick hug, his phone pinging with a message signaling that JT is waiting for him downstairs as you break away.
“See you later,” he says.
“Kick some Dallas butt.”
He laughs as he walks through the door leaving you to yourself. You don’t wait long until you start getting ready yourself, not being able to focus on your writing with the anticipation of the game in the back of your mind. You put your lucky Avalance hoodie on, grabbing your coat before leaving with more than enough time to catch the warm-ups. There’s a couple of familiar faces there when you arrive. You’d met the players’ girlfriends a few times, mostly in this exact setting and you fell right back into the group again. You felt for them, having to watch their boyfriends play such an unpredictable sport. You guess you could imagine how it felt at least a little, living with Tyson and all, but the energy they brought to every game was admirable.
The game was tight, the boys fell behind in the first period but in the second and third they were no doubt the better team, but the puck just wouldn’t go in the net. With ten minutes left they manage to tie it and with 5 minutes left Tyson takes a tripping penalty. They killed the penalty and scored not long after to secure the win, but you could see Tyson beating himself up over the penalty that could’ve cost them the game. The look on his face as he sat in the penalty box is something you keep in the back of your mind as you leave with the girls to meet him.
He’s one of the first ones to come out of the locker rooms, head hanging low. Gabe pats him on the shoulder before he greets his wife, Tyson throws a forced smile towards his captain that seems genuine to anyone that doesn’t know him the way you do. The smile reaches his eyes once he sees you though and he drapes his arm over your shoulder when he reaches you, leading you towards the garage - “Let’s go home”
To be continued...
---- Copyright © @matbaerzal (2021)
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ramp-it-up · 3 years
Note
Request:
Y/N is for one year in America and try to learn the language More (she is from Germany ).
Chris saw her at target and realized that she was kind of lost and was loved to help her 👀
Okayyyy Nonnie! How's this for a challenge?
At first I didn't know how I was going to get there from here, but I cruised IG for some German inspiration. As a result, instead of Y/N, reader is named Maëlle. I also struggled with the knowledge that most Germans know more English than Americans know of any other language, but this is all in fun. 😛
Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader (Maëlle)
Word Count: Around 2K
Warnings: 18+, RPF, MINORS DNI, CURATE YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE, not proofread, Google Translate for the German, verry limited American knowledge of Germans and German culture, not full on Smut, but smutty thots, thoughts of oral sex, fingering, degradation kink, allusions to Dom! behavior, disregarding of stranger danger, the Red Sox, and an age gap.
Maëlle
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One of your goals when you got settled was to go to Target, Ziel when you arrived in Boston for your graduate exchange year at Boston University.
You understood a great deal of English and could speak many phrases, but you’d hoped your year in America would make you fluent.
You were proud that you were able to get from the BU Student Union to the store. You surprised yourself with the ease that you used your phone to help you translate for what you needed.
Now, you were standing in front of the doors, almost in tears, trying to find where your Uber was to pick you up.
You didn’t pay attention to which way you entered and you needed to find VanNess street. It was about to leave. You suddenly felt helpless, hilflos.
—-
Chris needed to pick up some sunscreen before the game, he couldn't afford a burn right before filming. Even though he had his Red Sox cap on, he still needed some high grade sunblock.
He hurried through the doors of the Target near Fenway Park, head down, trying not to get recognized.
He passed by some beautiful long bronze legs and followed them up a smoking hot body clothed in a scarlet Boston University t-shirt tied up tight and short blue jean skirt.
Your face was framed by waist length blonde braids and your eyes were the most beautiful he’d ever seen.
Your lips deserved ten minutes all on their own, but he kept it moving, not wanting to seem creepy.
You were gorgeous, although you looked flustered. Chris didn’t slow his roll, because you were probably waiting on someone.
When he came back through, five minutes later, he heard your voice and slowed down. He was surprised, but shouldn’t have been. There were black people all over the world.
Even in Germany.
“Kannst du mir zeigen, wo die Van Ness Street ist? Can you tell me? Where is Van Ness Street?”
Your accent was heavy, but passersby just assumed you were crazy or joking with them and ignored you.
Chris was ashamed. That wasn’t what he wanted Boston to be. Even though he was close to being late for the first pitch, he stopped for you. He summoned some German from filming in Europe.
“Kann ich Ihnen helfen?” It was one thing he knew how to say with perfect inflection.
You perked up and smiled at him. “Ach bist du Deutscher? You’re German?”
You looked into the face of the handsome stranger. His eyes. Verdammt!
Chris melted a little bit. When you smiled, you were even more beautiful. Chris smiled back at you, smitten. He laughed.
“No. Italian.”
You understood, but you were confused. Why was this handsome American saying he was Italian and speaking to you in German? And why was he so familiar?
“Oh, Ich entschuldige mich. Sorry.” You smiled again, and Chris forgot all about the game. He wanted to try to talk to you for hours.
“No worries, he said. “Bitte?”
This handsome man’s German was indeed poor. He’d fooled you. He was a good actor. Something pinged in the back of your mind, but you overlooked it. Somehow, he’d made you feel better.
“Ich habe meinen Uber vermisst. Uber, gone!” You made a motion with your hand. “Kannst du mir zeigen, wo die VanNess Street ist?”
“Ohhhh! VanNess is this way,” he pointed toward the other side of the store, and he started leading you through.
You breathed a sigh of relief as you followed him.
You neared the electronics department and there was a giant movie display with dvds. The man saw it, pulled up, stopped, grabbed your hand and quickly led you back the other way.
You were confused.
“Come to think of it, I’ll give you a ride, my car is back out this way. Druben?”
Chris was not going to ruin his afternoon and a chance to talk to you by getting caught signing autographs in Target. He loved his fans, but he already liked you.
You followed him back out of the sliding doors to the parking lot and a blank Range Rover. You just went along with him, your hand feeling at home in his.
Then the panic set in.
You didn’t know this man from Adam.
Your mother had warned you about getting kidnapped by an American serial killer. This was it. You hated it when she was right.
“Wait!”
You said it perfectly, and the man caught your anxiety.
Chris stopped as he tried to open the door for you. He looked into your worried eyes. Shit, he’d gotten carried away. He looked down to where your hands were still locked.
He couldn’t help but smile at them. You smiled, too. Then he looked at you, blue eyes looking like the sea. You smiled back, somehow knowing that you were safe. You leaned back on the car.
“I’m not going to hurt you. My name is Christopher, what is yours?”
“Maëlle.”
Your smile was brightening his entire life. He was into you.
“That’s beautiful. Das ist schön?”
You smiled wider at his compliment. Then you bit your lip. Chris' knees got weak and he took a step closer to you to regain balance.
You were in each other’s space, Chris looking down at you and you at him. You were both getting warm even though it was a cool September day.
Chris pulled your hand instinctively, and you were even closer, your fingers entwined in his close to his thigh, which you could sense flexing through his jeans.
You were staring at his lips and he was doing the same as the butterflies flew around your stomach.
Were you really considering kissing someone you’d just met in Target? What would your mother think?
That thought made you smirk.
“What are you thinking?”
He was leaning over you, his voice in a lower register now. His breath tickled your ear and made you moan slightly.
Chris wanted to know what was going on in that mind of yours, if you were as crazy as he was feeling this kind of connection so fast.
You understood exactly what he was saying, but you just cocked your head and smiled as if you didn’t. You didn’t want him to think that you were thinking of his hands all over you, in your most intimate places.
Chris took a deep breath, trying to clear his head and regain blood flow to his brain. His cock was hard being this close to you and he had to regain composure.
He wasn’t that reckless kid he used to be, but man he wanted to do some depraved things to you. Like drag his tongue up your…
He had to stop. Chris took a step back.
You watched as his tongue peeled out to lick his bottom perfect pink lip. It was strange, but you felt like you knew him. And you wanted him to know you. Intimately.
And now those perfect lips were moving, but you weren’t paying close enough attention to translate what he was saying.
“Can I give you a lift to campus?”
You cocked your head in that pretty way again. He wondered what it would be like to feel your lips. On his lips. On his tattoos, around his…
Chris cleared his throat and tried to think of the words.
“Kann ich mitnehmen?”
He was so cute. You smiled brighter and nodded, “Yes, Christopher.”
Then you gestured to your bra-less breasts in your thin t-shirt. Chris could tell your nipples were hard. He licked his lips and looked around. This was a development.
Then he got your message. He shook his head, chuckling that his thoughts were in the gutter.
“Ooooooh! Boston University! You’re on campus. Yeah, that’s right near here. I’ll take you.”
“Danke. Thanks you, Christopher.”
Your smile would be the end of him. He had to think of a creative way to get your number.
“Hey! Let’s take a picture!” He had his phone out.
You were confused, but maybe this is what Americans did to get to know each other. Take pictures with strangers.
He took a couple of pics and then opened the door for you.
You brushed past him to get in, and Chris allowed his eyes to take in your form, especially your shapely legs.
You noticed him checking you out, and immediately got goosebumps, your nipples hardening again. Your panties were a little moist.
“Let’s just get you… “
Chris reached across you for the seatbelt with his right hand, face coming near yours as he leaned into the car.
“Buckled in…”
Now you were sure your panties were soaked.
Chris allowed his mind to go places, like your pussy, which he was sure was sweet, wet, hot and…
“….Tight.”
Chris gulped, trying not to drool all over you, although he would love to spit in your mouth and make you swallow as he fucked you raw.
“Danke.”
You whispered behind a breathy moan. You wanted not only to ride in this man’s car. You wanted to ride this man in his car.
Your eyes flickered down to his jeans and that’s when Chris realized that he had a raging hard on. He quickly put his hand in his pocket, trying to play it off, flashed a smile and closed the door quickly.
You giggled at how huge what you thought you saw was. You fanned yourself while you waited for him to get in trying to remember your decorum.
Chris stood outside the back of the car for a minute, trying to catch his breath and think. He had to be at least 15 year older than you, he just met you, and you didn’t speak English. None of this made sense.
He was going to drop you off at campus and try to be at the game for the second inning. And act his age.
Christopher got back in the car, much more formal, and started driving.
He looked over to see your legs open and started to wonder how easy it would be to reach over and under your skirt, pull your panties to the side, if you were wearing any, and…
Chris cleared his throat and focused on the road.
You could tell the air had changed. He was different. You wondered what happened.
You looked at his profile and decided that he was turned off by you being so forward. You decided to straighten up, so you did so, literally and figuratively.
You sat up straight and crossed your legs, like prim and proper young ladies do.
The curve of your spine and the crossing of your legs made Chris irrationally angry. It was like you were closing yourself off to him. Then he remembered.
You didn’t know each other.
You pointed out where to go as you neared your apartment. Chris pulled up in front of your unit and you both started talking.
“Danke, Christopher.”
“Hey, Maëlle…”
You both chuckled. Chris continued.
“Let me send you that photo. What’s your number?” He was fiddling with his phone. Then handed it to you. “Type it in for me.”
You grinned wide and his sly smile answered you. Now you understood. You entered your number and handed it back to him, your fingers sparking as you touched.
You were breathless.
“Well…”
“Christopher…”
You two interrupted each other again.
This time you continued.
“Thank you.”
You leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek.
Chris closed his eyes. Your lips felt as soft as he imagined. He wanted to do the whole turn his head trick but he wasn’t 23 anymore. But you sure made him feel like it.
He did turn to look at you as you got out of the car and waved after you closed it. You swung your bag in one hand as you walked toward the building, also swinging your hips, watching him as he drove away.
Chris watched you too, as far as he could in the rearview. When you disappeared from sight, he said, “Fuck it,” did a uturn and peeled rubber back to your apartments. He rolled down the window.
“Maëlle! Maëlle!” You stopped just before you reached your door. Chris grinned at you. “You ever been to an American baseball game before?”
You skipped back down the walk happily, grinning back as you leaned in the open window. You cocked your head in that way.
“No, but I like playing wit the balls.”
Chris groaned. He couldn’t tell if you were talking about sports or something else. But he’d figure it out later. You climbed in the car, winked at him and crossed your legs.
Chris licked his lips as he drove back toward Fenway Park, thinking about how he would teach you about keeping your legs open that night.
——
Hope it’s okay Nonnie! ❤️
@olyvoyl @summerofsnowflakes @sillyteecup @riiyy @honeysucklechocolatedrippin @theselilwonders @lonelydance @chattykathysquietsister @anh1020 @nissameta1782 @betterkeepmewetterthanabayou @jbrizzywrites @stilltoyou @donutloverxo @wallowsgirl14 @my-soulmate-is-mycroft @kiwisa @food8me @aiikaa @marvelfansworld @justanormalfangirlsworld @lost-in-a-state-of-mind @london-grunge @pheebsyells @douxtille @thesecretlifeofdaydreams @ximaginex @jdmacca92 @fofisstilinski @dyapraxicwhore @bertieandberries @ladystrawberry @bit-of-a-timelord @aaronhotchiee @calimoi @fangirlfree @bbaengtan @karolsboo @aliceforbes @insertpithyusername @sickknik @photmath @whorekneebrain @mostannoyingbillioner @anacravalho @iconicshit @spicybibimbap @chaoticsteverogers @txtsfromyourex @sadthotsonlylove @assoftheamericana @ikatieebabyy @nerdymugsharkempath @crossfitjesusinblackskinnyjean @maroonsunrise83
293 notes · View notes
peachyteez · 3 years
Text
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 harmless pranks ≫ DAY ONE, WOOYOUNG?!
this mischevious dolphin hybrid escaped an illegal experiment lab and has wandered the ocean for almost a year. all he longed for was love and attention—maybe even a family. who knew his “little” prank on jiyu would be the beginning to all of his wishes being granted.
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PART OF THE HEAVEN SERIES.
✧ taglist: @defsoul15, @jaeminpeachy, @joongiebug, @sunsethw4, @t-tbinnie, @chanyeolol, @danibookmarks, @hello-its-ya-boi, @murralyn, @panini, @moon8894, @koasworld, @taetae123094, @luv3rxcha, @treasure-hwa, @etherealbyeol, @hwaseongzzz, @lovely-sanie, @orbitiiny, @pirate-of-the-dark-seas, @babydolljo, @ms-starlight, @everrrlasting, @bls-luv-me, @atzgiggle, @arohabyeol, @rainbowmagicpixecorn, @soverystupid, @ayetothezee, @kingalls00, @sanstreasure0305, @sparklingmallow, @kpopnightingale, @rosesarethebest, @stillcantfindaproperusername, @bonbonhwa, @its-sarah-stark, @sanismybb, @frankenstein852, @peachseok, @woopetals, @exhofayemars, @pvrkacciosan, 
✧ can’t be tagged: @alienmashup, @c-sanshine, @int0chae
✧ notes: surprise! i know i scheduled the release for may 7th, but thought i’d release it a little early :)
next。
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“i can’t believe you’re up and leaving us for a month,” yeonjun sarcastically commented while helping her lug her last luggage into the mercedes van that sunwoo had been so generous enough to send to pick them up. “and from the looks of it, it doesn’t look like soobin, beomgyu, and taehyun are going to let go of the others.”
and true to his word, she looked over to see them gathered in a group hug. beomgyu clung onto yunho with teary eyes, he’s never been separated from him for a month before. yunho gently pat the younger puppy’s head with a small smile. 
she chuckled at the heartwarming scene. “guys, you’ll still be able to call and facetime. and you’re acting like we’re never coming back! we’re only going to jeju island.”
“but what if you run away with this person because they’re rich?” beomgyu asked, ignorant to her background. at his question, the other boys gasped and whipped their heads over to her. 
her smile slightly faltered, forgetting that they don’t know of her origins. she knew she’d have to come clean someday—maybe this trip was the right time to tell. 
“don’t be ridiculous, of course we are,” she gently reprimanded before coming over to ruffle beomgyu’s hair. “beomgyu’s imagination is just running a tad bit wild.”
pouting, beomgyu shifted from yunho to engulf her in a bear hug. 
“soobin and i’ll make sure beomgyu doesn’t grow any grey hairs while worrying about you guys,” taehyun jokingly reassured. he knew beomgyu well enough, even though he was an addition to the family a month ago.  
“miss, it’s about time to depart to the airport,” the driver informed with a bow. 
with a nod, she rubbed beomgyu’s head. “okay, we need to go now, bub. we’ll message you when we get there, okay?”
reluctantly nodding, beomgyu let her go. he joined soobin, taehyun, and yeonjun to see them off, waving until they not longer saw the black vehicle. 
in the car, yunho, mingi, san, and yeosang were fascinated with how fancy the interior was. there were two rows of two seats, and row with three seats in the back. the seats were so comfortable, and it was so roomy; an environment unfamiliar to the hybrids. while seonghwa and yunho knew somewhat of her background, the others wondered how she managed to afford something like this. 
“is your friend rich?” san asked, looking back to face jiyu. seating arrangements were decided by an intense game of rock-paper-scissors. in the end, yeosang and hongjoong sat in front, mingi and san were in the middle row, and jiyu was squished in between yunho and seonghwa in the back. 
“that’s one way of putting it, yes.” in truth, she was worried about how they would react to her and sunwoo’s background. most of them had come from influential families or illegal organizations to begin with. having terrible memories with them, would they change once they knew who she really was?
“but don’t worry, he’s really nice! he has a hybrid friend of his own, too. i think he said a german shepard hybrid.” yunho seemed to perk up at the thought of meeting another dog hybrid. 
“hm...if you say so. if you trust him, then we do, too,” hongjoong said before getting comfortable in the seat. 
upon arriving at the airport, the van immediately took them to the runway where a private plane was parked and waiting. she assumed it was sunwoo’s. the boys plastered their faces against the van windows at the sight of the plane. they’ve never been on one before, hence their childlike fascination. 
“are we really going on that?” san asked with excitement. “i love your friend already,” he teasingly commented. 
jiyu softly chuckled as the van came to a stop. hopping out, she saw sunwoo standing at the entrance to the plane with a hybrid she assumed was eric. catching sight of jiyu, he started climbing down the stairs. she smiled and waved to him, an action he returned with a small chuckle. 
“were you waiting long?”
he shook his head. “don’t worry, we came ten minutes ago. eric’s been eager to meet you and your—” seeing the six hybrids behind her filing out of the van, his eyes widened. he knew she had hybrids, but he didn’t really know what to expect. “you have six?”
she sheepishly chuckled. “yeah...i hope you don’t mind. they won’t bite if that’s what you’re worried about.”
on the contrary, sunwoo didn’t mind at all; it actually made her a hundred times cooler in his eyes if anything. he’s never met a girl who managed to befriend six different hybrid breeds. but then again, with her job, he should’ve seen it coming. despite that, she just kept surprising him with who she is. 
“guys, this is sunwoo,” she called out to the boys. “he’s the friend i was talking about!” 
while the boys acquainted themselves with sunwoo, the german shepard hybrid approached jiyu with a friendly smile. “hi, i’m eric! although i think sunwoo told you plenty about me already.”
jiyu giggled at the boy’s abundance of energy. “he has mentioned you a few times. i’m jiyu.”
eric enthusiastically nodded. “i’ve heard about you a lot, too! sunwoo didn’t stop talking about you for a whole week after your first meeting.”
jiyu felt her face flush at the new piece of information. “a week—”
“ji! sunwoo said there’s also video games on the plane!”
before eric could continue exposing sunwoo, yunho came bounding up to her with the others in tow. with their calm and excited demeanor, she assumed that they managed to feel relaxed and at home with sunwoo, which made her happy and relieved. 
“is that so?” she mused, rubbing the spot behind his ears. yunho nodded and giggled, pushing his head into jiyu’s hands. eric glanced at sunwoo and couldn’t help the smirk on his face at the sight of the soft look on his friend’s face. 
snapping out of his reverie, sunwoo cleared his throat. “we should get going.”
the plane ride nothing out of the ordinary—the boys were getting to know eric, while jiyu and sunwoo caught up over a glass of champagne. 
“so it seems like your friends don’t know about you yet?” sunwoo inquired. “i told eric to keep his mouth shut about it just in case.”
softly shaking her head, she quietly glanced at the hybrid group that had passed out not too long ago after expending all of their energy. “only seonghwa and yunho know about it. i never found the right time to tell the others but this trip might be it.”
mingi had sleepily wandered over towards them and plopped down next to her before laying his head on her lap. within a few minutes, his breath evened out again. 
an endearing chuckle left her lips as she threaded her fingers through his faded red hair. “ah, you big baby,” she cooed. 
sunwoo watches her with a soft smile on his face. he watches the way she gently lulls the giant bunny to sleep, the mother-like smile on her face, the gentle aura she exudes—he could go on and on. she was completely different from what he had been expecting. while they had a few brief meetings during company gatherings, she always had a blank expression, never smiling nor frowning. it was almost like she was more robot than human.
when his parents had informed him of his future marriage with her, he didn’t know how to react. a part of him would’ve been lying if he had denied feeling the tiniest bit of disdain at his fate.
but lo and behold, she managed to leave him soft and charmed with every meeting, even if this was only their second one. 
“sir, ma’am, we’ll be landing in about ten minutes. please fasten your seatbelts.” 
his pilot’s voice managed to break him out of his thoughts, leaving him to scramble to sit up straighter and cool his flushed face. 
“i should wake them up,” jiyu said, completely unaware of sunwoo’s dilemma. softly shaking mingi’s shoulder, she gently prodded him awake before relaying the pilot’s message to him. padding over to the others, she did the same.
sunwoo sighed before buckling in his own seatbelt. he needed to keep himself in check around her before he accidentally does something that would embarrass himself. this is going to be a long month.
upon arriving at the private vacation home, jiyu was already bombarded with the youngers’ pleas to go to the beach. luckily for them, the vacation home was just down the street from the beach, giving them easy access to visit whenever they wanted. 
“i’m really sorry, i hope you don’t mind,” she apologized to sunwoo for the fact that they were going to the beach the moment they put their bags down. “if you’re tired, you can stay. i can take—”
sunwoo’s soft chuckle made her pause mid-sentence. she didn’t know he was capable of making such a melodious sound. while she was still living in the main house, her friends had painted him to be an aloof person. and even from what she saw at company dinners. the daughters of other elites were always throwing themselves at him, offering him drinks and their company. 
yet every singe time without fail, he would coldly reject them.
so when yuta had told her that he was the one her father set her up with, she was doubtful if they could even be civil with each other. 
“it’s fine, i’ll go with you and the others. eric’s been pestering me to go, too so it works out.”
the soft and friendly expression was just proof to her that maybe, just maybe, she had been judging the facade he puts up.
“oh, okay then!” she smiled before scurrying to her room to change. “let’s meet back here when we’re ready!”
watching her excited like a child to go to the ocean, he couldn’t contain the smile that he had been biting back. he was glad that they could at least be friends despite the circumstances.
“stop staring at her door and go change, loverboy.”
he was bought back to reality by his best friend’s quip. throwing him a half-hearted glare, he trudged to his room. “i wasn’t staring.” even his protest was weak. 
eric couldn’t help the smirk that crosses his face. he’s known his best friend long enough to know that he never gets like this around girls. “this should be an interesting trip.”
by the time they all met back up to leave, it was two p.m.—a prime time for the sun to be out and bestowing them with it’s heat on their short walk to the beach.
“it’s the ocean!” yunho shouted with utter glee and happiness as he and eric raced each other across the sand and to the water. the others ran after them, even san who ended up straying on shore and dipping his feet in the water. hongjoong joined him as he watched over the others in the water. 
jiyu and sunwoo had found a group of beach chairs under a big umbrella and tossed their bags down. stretching her limbs, jiyu sprawled out on a chair and closed her eyes for a brief moment. hearing the ocean waves along with the cheerful shouts of the boys in the water made her smile with content. 
cracking an eye open, she caught sunwoo throwing off the white t-shirt he had on and shaking his head afterward to fix his hair. her eyes raked over his body against her own will. his lean figure, the define abs lined on his stomach, and the hints of muscles on his arm only served to have a volcano of butterflies erupt in her stomach. 
“everything okay?” he asked, leaning down towards her face.
looking away from his piercing gaze, she jumped up and quickly discarded her own outerwear before speed-walking towards the water. “yep! just great!” she definitely didn’t miss the smirk that was threatening to take over his face. 
sunwoo smirked before running to catch up with her. he couldn’t help but take note of the red two-piece she was sporting. a part of him wanted to throw his earlier discarded t-shirt over her to give her coverage from other people’s gazes that were lingering just a bit too long, but he bit back his own desire.
after all, they were just budding friends who were about to be stuck in an arranged, and potentially loveless, marriage.
but that didn’t stop him from lifting her up and tossing her into the water.
emerging back up, she had to rub her eyes to get rid of the salt water before throwing a glare towards the laughing culprit.
“kim sunwoo!” she stood up and crossed her arms across her chest like an angry child. 
“i had to—hey!”
too busy caught up in his own laughter, he failed to notice the wolf hybrid sneaking up behind him to exact revenge for jiyu. emerging up next to jiyu, shook his head to remove excess water out of his hair before looking for his culprit. seeing the proudly-smiling seonghwa on shore with his hands on his hips, he let out snort. 
“alright, you got me.”
she burst into giggles before floating on her back. looking up at the sky, there were no hints of clouds—just the endless blue that seemed to stretch out for miles on end. feeling someone tug her feet, she perked her head up to see yeosang pulling her. 
“you were floating too far out,” he informed before lightly flicking her forehead. “watch out before you float away and we’re stranded here without you,” he added with a chuckle, just barely missing the splash of water that jiyu retaliated with, before swimming off back to yunho and mingi. 
“he seems fun to be around,” sunwoo said as swam up to join her. “he reminds me of eric, only more sass.”
“yeah, i never know where his sass comes from—”
she was cut off by a huge splash of water from behind that had not only hit her, but also sunwoo. turning around, she expected it to be yeosang, san, or eric.
but no one was behind them. 
sunwoo furrowed his eyebrows. the hybrid group was at least twenty feet away from them—there was no way any of them could’ve done it since he and jiyu would’ve heard them swimming off or laughing. 
“that’s odd, who—ah!”
before jiyu could finish her sentence, a pair of arms grabbed her waist and yanked her underwater. having no time to react, she felt herself being tugged away as they started swimming with her in tow.
sunwoo swore his heart almost stopped; whether it be from the fact that it all happened so quickly or the fact that jiyu could potentially be drowning, he didn’t know. he didn’t have time to know.
“oi, what the—!”  
his scream caught the others attention. looking over, they sunwoo looking frantic pulling something up from under the water. 
but there was no jiyu. 
they all swam over with urgency, fearing something went wrong.
“where is she?” hongjoong asked, brows furrowing with panic. the others looked ready to fight what or whoever took jiyu, even yunho and mingi even though they both looked on the verge of crying. 
“something pulled her down and just...swam away!”
meanwhile, underwater, jiyu was having a ball trying to fight off what or whoever pulled her down. it was definitely a person—she felt the arms around her waist and the hard chest that was tightly pressed against her back. looking behind her she managed to make out a male with majestic, black with gold highlights. 
the lack of air snapped her back to reality from her gawking and she stared to try and pry the man’s hands off of her. as if catching onto her message, he quickly brought her back up to the surface. 
inhaling like her life depended on it and coughing out some water, she turned around and glared at whoever decided to try and almost drown her.
but before she could her a word out, she was blown away by how...pretty the man staring back at her was. with his hair tucked behind his ears, it framed his face perfectly, showing off his distinct and defined facial features.
but something else caught her eye. 
the lower half of his body was a tail. eyes flicking back and forth from the man’s face to the tail, her mouth opened and closed like fish out of water.
“a fish h-hybrid..?”
“oi, jiyu!” 
at the sound of her name, she looked behind the man to see everyone swimming up to her. it turned out that they weren’t that far away from shore—the man, or hybrid, just took her along the shoreline rather than farther out like she had originally thought. 
the unknown hybrid just watched as the seven other hybrids and sunwoo crowded her to make sure she was okay. yeosang profusely apologized, saying “i know i joked about you floating away and stranding us, but i didn’t mean to make that a reality”.
sunwoo ruffled her wet hair, breathing out a sigh of relief. “you scared me there. i thought i was going to lose you on the first day here.”
“huh? yeosang?”
at the sound of his name, yeosang turned around and practically fainted. he literally swam past him, how did he manage to miss the extremely familiar face.  he stared at the underwater hybrid, wide-eyed, like he had witnessed another miracle from the universe. the unknown man mirrored yeosang’s look.
“wooyoung?!”
201 notes · View notes
chidoroki · 3 years
Text
Isabella - 73584
I had a serious debate with myself over whether or not I wanted to sit down and spend my weekend writing another one of these praise posts. I was content with just doing one for each of the Fullscore Trio kids and ending it there.. but apparently I love this woman too much to just ignore her on her birthday. So here were are on September 9th with a list of all her best and my personal favorite moments as to why I believe she’s such a great character, antagonist and mother (yeah you heard me right). Considering she only shows up in the beginning and very end of the story, this post ended up longer than I originally anticipated, which just goes to show how many thoughts I really have about this woman. (for real, this rivals Ray’s post in terms of points but there’s far more words)
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Since she also has some backstory and certain events differ between manga and anime (thanks to the second season), I’ll try to go in chronological order between both timelines instead of chapter by chapter, which might be a bit confusing as we’ll jump around the story a lot but just to bear with me as I try to makes sense of it all.
(spoilers for the entirety of The Promised Neverland & ch181.7, so if you haven’t read/completed the manga yet, consider this your first warning, because I’m literally going from start to finish with this one last time. I promise.)
- I’m not sure how well she compares to Emma when it comes to athleticism, but Isabella seemed to have no trouble climbing up and down trees when she was younger.
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- Not only that, but she managed to scale the wall by herself using a method that requires a fairly impressive jump. It’s also implied that this is how she climbs the wall again so many years later when chasing the soon-to-be escapees, which helps prove that even at an older age, she hasn’t lost her touch.
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- Was chosen to undergo training to become a Mom, which required high test scores and the current mother’s recommendation. She accepted the offer in order to keep living and survive as human the demons couldn’t eat.
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- Based on Sienna’s comment, is it fair to say Isabella is on par with the full score trio? I mean, the woman is basically flawless.
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- She was practically untouchable during her time at headquarters while training too apparently. Mom positions are scarce so the environment where these ladies fight (physically/mentally/emotionally) to even snag that job is highly competitive, and yet Isabella never let anyone deter her from her goal of becoming a Mom, which probably led to the “Iron Lady” nickname she received now that I think about it.
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- She was the youngest ever to be granted the Mom position at..what, 19? 20? Somewhere around there, but impressive nonetheless considering they’re forced to have a child, build up a strong, emotionless exterior and endure so much fear. (but my goodness, the woman doesn’t age at all. she looks just as good when the story actually starts as she did her when she was a bit younger)
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- It became common knowledge among the Sisters that she was also very successful in the way she raised her children.
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- Her success greatly benefited the farm, as she offered up countless high quality goods, which sounds terrible, I know, but believe me when I say she gave her best effort for her children. Even though she held the Mom position, the amount of power she actually had in this system was pretty minimal, especially with how much she valued her own life. She couldn’t afford to make any mistakes or risky changes, so she settled with doing the most with what she was capable of. She provided her children with a normal lifestyle, not only to keep up the orphanage facade, but knowing that their lives would all be cut shorter than they anticipate. She gave them love in hopes that no one would ever have to feel the dread she felt after Leslie’s death and/or finding out the truth. She tried to delay that horrific fate by encouraging them to learn all they can (like teaching the trio about strategy and chess) so they could achieve higher tests scores and (unknowingly to them) add a couple more months or years onto their lives. Yes it was her job to raise these children to such high standards but she excelled at it for their sake too.
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- And I know y’all will just throw Ray in my face like, “oh but he was her actual child and she treated him horribly/different.” Okay but deep down I don’t think she actually wanted to? When they both realized they were truly mother and son, Isabella couldn’t just dote on him and start treating him as such. I’m sure Ray wasn’t too fond of Isabella at this point in his life either, knowing that she sent several of his siblings away to get killed. They probably would’ve gotten along just fine in a perfect world, but since they were both aware of the hell they’re trapped living in, they emotionally distanced themselves and formed a business-like relationship as a result of Ray’s deal, which benefited them both in different ways. For Ray, it was more practical, with the obvious notion of living as long as possible along with obtaining various rewards and knowledge of the outside world. For Isabella, it helped emotionally by simply just ignoring their true relation. I believe if she clung to that realization, it would break the orphanage illusion and eventually wear down her “Iron Lady” exterior that she relies so heavily on.
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- Like can you imagine how much you would have to harden your heart in order to quite literally walk children to their death every couple months for years on end and just move on like it’s completely normal? Now imagine how earth shattering it must be to think about doing the same to your actual child. All those years spent perfecting a fake smile and emotionless exterior like she was trained to have and her son shatters it in an instant. She becomes completely terrified about how he’s actually alive and in front of her right now and there’s nothing she can do to truly save him.. and yet she still recovers so damn quickly I can’t even comprehend it! But there’s still some sadness in those eyes. You can’t tell me otherwise. That one moment of weakness speaks volumes to me.
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- So now with her general backstory FINALLY out of the way, we can finally start with ch01/ep01 and how her laugh is sweet and innocent. I say that because (all hidden emotions and motives aside) that’s exactly how she’s supposed to sound in this moment, not only to us but to the children as well.
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- She of course checks Emma’s tracker a moment later but other than that I still think it’s a pretty genuine moment between the two.
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- As previously stated, her ability to raise high quality children is unmatched, which is clear as day thanks to the fullscore trio.
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- Despite their crazy level of intelligence, the trio has yet to win a simple game of chess against Isabella, even when teamed up.
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- She treasures everything about the kids.
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- She really cares about them, even when it’s time to send them off with a smile, which we know is thanks to her strong facade.
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- But mother dearest isn’t really fine. She doesn’t like walking kids to their death, especially so young. But she can’t let them (or even herself) know that. She can’t show weakness, so she hums Leslie’s song, which is a tool she’s used for years in order to give herself strength.
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- Don’t worry, I disliked her this moment happened too, just as the story intended. And here’s where her fantastic antagonist role begins for all the world to see.
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- A true champ at jump scares.
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- Acts completely calm the night after a couple of kids found out the secret of the farm.
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- She uses the tracker in plain sight, sending whomever went to the gate last night a threatening but silent message.
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- Correct Norman, that’s the “Iron Lady” for ya. Also the name of ch03 for us. Well, “The Iron Woman” but same difference.
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- She switches from calculating and manipulative breeder to sweet and pleasant mother so quickly and effortlessly it’s incredible. Isabella even checked Emma’s pulse in this scene to see if she was acting normal.
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- At this point she still had no idea who went to the gate (Ray didn’t tip her off yet, at least I don’t think so) but her guess couldn’t have been more precise. The level of fear she drives into both Emma and Norman was great too, but then again her presence is enough in any scene to give us chills.
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- Notices her watchdog isn’t at his usual post and starts to get suspicious.
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- Not only of him, Emma and Norman, but Don and Gilda as well, thus giving the five extra chores to finish in an attempt to slow down any escape planning, such as cleaning vacant rooms, organizing the pantry and inspecting spare linen.
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- While the trio believes Isabella was being too soft and patient in finding her targets, she effectively catches them off guard by bringing in Krone for assistance. The trio soon realize they were actually preparing the sister’s new room and those mundane chores were just an excuse to buy time.
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- Look at her, all smug. Checkmate indeed. (and totally not important, but her eyes are such pretty shades of purple)
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- The sass and her no nonsense attitude.
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- Immediately puts Krone in her place the moment she even thinks about shipping out the targets. Of course holding off on shipping the targets would benefit the farm, as it would produce higher quality merchandise as time passes, but plant 3 is run by Isabella and she’ll be damned if an assistant thinks they could waltz right in and decide her children’s fate.
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- She check’s Emma tracker again despite her claim of knowing exactly who the targets might be. You can never be too careful.
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- Her precious children managed to win a game of tag against Krone, which is still impressive considering the kind of training the sister has gone through, so kudos to her teachings.
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- Knows right away that Krone was trying to take advantage, which allows Krone to realize that the opening she had to learn more about the children was all planned by Isabella herself. Her intimidating nature is enough to scare adults too.
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- Reveals that Krone was mostly summoned in order to keep Ray in check after his failure.
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- Despite the trust issue, Isabella still keeps up her end of the deal by requesting the items Ray asked for, thanks to the odd perks she had under Grandma Sarah which allowed her to order goods that weren’t on the supply list.
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- This hug between her and Phil is just too cute not to mention.
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- I imagine she makes this comment because she knows exactly how long a rope must be based off her own almost-escape.
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- It’s just something about how this scene is framed alongside this dialogue that makes me think “oh, like mother, like son.”
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- I blame her very thoughtful planning for my first big freak out when I watched season 1 blind, like ma’am that’s my favorite boy, please don’t.
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- She conspires with Grandma Sarah in order to get rid of Krone for good, which renders the evidence sister just found out about the children’s escape completely useless. Sarah believes there might be some truth to it, but ultimately ignores it and puts her faith in Isabella’s ability of controlling the children & the situation.
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- She then cuts Ray off and ends their six-year long deal, opting to control the situation herself from now on. Also, how she wanted to keep him around until the very end is kinda bittersweet. Does she mean as merchandise? Or because she wanted him to live as long as possible? Ah such a tricky little comment.
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- She also tosses him across the room like a rag doll.
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- Thank god for this panel existing and actually being adapted into the anime so I could hear it because I had absolutely no memory of her laughing in this moment.
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- “She says it so nonchalantly,” Norman said once upon a time, and it’s still so frightening.
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- As insane as her ideals seem given the circumstances, nothing she says here is really a lie.
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- She has the strength to quite literally break a leg and that cracking noise still haunts me to this day.
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- It wasn’t even a spur of the moment thing either. Isabella came fully prepared with bandages to fix up any injury she was willing to inflict and that thought alone is terrifying.
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- Not only that, but she broke it so cleanly that Emma’s leg does indeed heal perfectly in the exact time frame she estimates. This entire moment is so unfairly impressive, like ma’am how dare you do this to Emma of all people.. like why couldn’t you at least use that kind of force to snap Peter’s neck instead or something?
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- To make matters worse, she then reveals Norman’s shipment date. And it’s the following day, which sends the kids into a very understandable panic.
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- Needless to say, November 2nd, 2045 was a very successful day in the life of Isabella. Woman was putting everyone in checkmate in ep08 and my anger on full blast.
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- This sly smile she sends Ray’s way after announcing Norman’s shipment to the younger kids is so cruel.. it’s perfect.
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- I can only imagine she asked about Ray’s whereabouts because she knew the boys were close friends and she hoped they would at least say goodbye to one another, but that’s just me.
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- Puts an end to Norman’s parting words in such a simple and chilling matter.
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- The way she just openly threatens Emma with others just out of earshot.
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- Norman out here asking the real questions. If anything, I say she’s more “content” rather than happy. I don’t think she’s ever really thought about her own happiness, at least not often enough, hence the slight pause. This entire time she’s been focusing on how to make her children’s lives perfect, but for herself she just wants to survive in this hellish world they’re all living in.
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- I’m honestly still not sure who’s final decision it is to send people to Lambda, either Isabella, Peter or someone else (honestly never bothered to check), but whether or not Isabella had any say in the matter, I’m sure she’s at least a little glad that Norman gets to live a bit longer? Perhaps that’s a stretch, but I’m putting the idea here anyway.
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- I say this because I believe that’s part of the reason why she offered Emma a Mom recommendation, not only because our girl’s high test scores, but in hopes that she could live a longer life.
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- Although she really stresses in an intimidation fashion how pointless Emma’s efforts are now that Norman’s “dead,” the cliff remains a major hazard and her leg is still bandaged up, Isabella still tries so hard to convince her to give up, like Ray has, in order for Emma to end her own suffering. It was the first instance during my blind watch-through were I started to get the hint that Isabella might actually care about her kids, and of course I know now it’s because she didn’t want Emma to experience the same pain she did after Leslie’s death.
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- With Emma and Ray both broken, things went by rather smoothly for Isabella those last two months, though she continued to keep a close eye on them.
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- Her humming is so soothing. And why it took me this long to bring up “Isabella’s Lullaby” is beyond me, but oh my god, that song and any other soundtrack that uses its melody is absolute perfection.
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- Had enough sense to not let her guard down the final night, even though her efforts were ultimately unsuccessful, but the idea counts.
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- Though her caretaker side is focused on more during the fire, some motherly instincts do kick in as she instructs Gilda to get the babies from her room and lead everyone outside to safety. She was also concerned for Emma’s well being, hoping all the smoke didn’t get to her when the girl vanished. (i know you can argue “she’s only worried because they’re merchandise” which is fair but c’mon, i swear she’s not completely heartless)
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- Took a hot minute (ahha) but Isabella eventually realized that the kids were actually escaping solely based on what they were wearing on their feet. I’m sure Emma’s discarded left ear was a big tip off too but to come to that conclusion by noticing the shoes they had on during all that chaos is surprising.
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- She looks completely insane here but I always thought this shot of her was nicely animated with all the fire (or embers? sparks? whatever they are) flying around. The laugh she does before this is also a nice bonus. Oh, and she somehow managed to secure a radio from the room Don had locked.
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- Figured the fifteen kids would head towards the bridge and called in headquarters to block it off.
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- But when the children didn’t appear at the bridge, she just happened to know exactly where else they might try to cross the cliff.
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- In the anime’s case, Isabella climbed the wall and ran there quick enough to engage in a stare down with Emma before she finally slid down.
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- The moment I knew I was doomed.
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- After the 15 kids successfully escaped, Isabella admits defeat, for she couldn’t really see how much her children have grown to outsmart her.
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- This iconic quote, which conveys so much truth and sincerity. There were multiple occasions where she had to distance and restrain herself due to the system that controlled her, but the love she was able to show the children was genuine. If she wasn’t held back by the strict rules enforced by Mom position, I don’t doubt she would’ve treated Ray better or became far more emotional whenever a child had to leave for good or seriously injured, instead of donning a fake smile and being closed off.
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- She realizes with this unspeakable loss in merchandise, the reputation she worked so hard to build up is meaningless now and that the farm no longer has any use for such an incompetent caretaker. She figures she’s as good as dead anyway now, so she wastes no time in actually helping the escapees by reclaiming the ropes to hide their exact method and route of escape, if only to grant the kids some extra time before the pursuers really locate them.
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- She doesn’t act bitter as a result of her loss, instead choosing to wish the escapees luck with the future they grasped for themselves and care for the children that were left behind.
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- She’s just so pretty y’all. Thank you anime.
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- She was named “Best Antagonist” (and rightfully so!) back during the 2020 Crunchyroll Anime Awards, winning over Askeladd (Vinland Saga), Overhaul, (My Hero Academia), Garoua (One Punch Man,) & others.
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(Post-season 1 spoilers ahead, even though the anime is completely finished at this point, but will be touching upon her special chapter more as well.)
- Completely owns up to her mistakes that caused the farm a massive loss in profitable goods and is ready to received whatever punishment necessary, which she expects to be death.
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- Only.. she’s not being killed, she’s actually being promoted to Grandma. Though Isabella was directly responsible for the children’s escape, the blame ultimately falls on Sarah who couldn’t correctly control Isabella, thus leading the old lady to be shipped out in place of the goods Isabella lost.
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- Peter also notes that the farm found more worth in Isabella than Sarah, so her past merits also played a part in sparing her life, as having a woman like Isabella in charge would surely produce the level of quality the farm needs.
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- Isabella eventually accepts the promotion, though she can’t help but feel hesitant and shocked about the whole deal. This woman was ready to embrace death and finally be free from this cruel world, but now she has to witness not only more kids being shipped off, but moms and sisters in training as well (yay old chapter reviews coming in clutch).
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- She could have very well just refused Peter’s offer, but we all know how much Isabella originally wanted to survive, so she doesn’t just accept because this man dangled a sense of freedom in her face, she also agreed so she could have the opportunity to help her children in any way her newfound power would allow her.
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- Of course, her transition to Grandma happens a bit differently in the second season, but I will give some bittersweet thanks to the anime once more for the obvious but curse them for also having this entire scene dark as hell. Let me see her beauty darn it! I can only fix the lighting so much until it looks overexposed and bad again.
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Anyways, Sarah is still alive at this point and taunts Isabella with the escapee’s lives just to see how she would react, which gave her a small sense of hope. Then some demons pay a visit later on and also ask if she would want to see the children one last time, but Isabella tells them that not only would she be too ashamed to face them but that they would manage to survive Grandma’s capture plan, which involved several men blowing up their shelter. It’s now clear to the demons that these children are special, and while Isabella agrees, it’s not for the same reason the demons think so. The demons believe the kids are special because of how they were raised to such a high quality. Isabella calls them special simply because they’re her children, just as any mother would.
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- In the anime, it’s the demons who offer Isabella the Grandma deal if Sarah’s current plan were to fail (which it does) and she takes it and the freedom from Grace Field House without question. Do I still believe she had similar intentions to help out the children like she did in manga at this point? Of course.
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- Not even a full month into her new job did she start preparing to help Emma & the others by considering who from the current Sisters she wanted to recruit to personally assist her destroy the farm entirely.
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- A month later and Isabella had already decreased the number of shipments that took place at Grace Field, which obviously helps raise the quality of the children by default, but it also means less death and gives those kids a chance to live longer.
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- She completely anticipated that Matilda, Jessica, Sienna & Scarlet were conspiring against her and caught them quite easily, as they were among the top scorers.
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- Each had a fair chance at becoming Moms but with those positions limited, it was obvious to figure out they were trying to force Isabella’s seat open by creating some suspicious activity to place on her almost perfect record. Unfortunately for the girls, our new Grandma is too smart for her own good and I love it.
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- The four women are apprehensive to join her insane plan to go against the farm, but Isabella assures them there’s no freedom if they follow the system’s rules and betray her. The harsh reality they’re all living in will continue unless they stop competing with one another and combine forces to defeat the true enemy.
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- To persuade them further, Isabella mentions the children they all gave birth to are still alive, bringing out an array of emotions from the women that they each thought they had buried deep down.
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- THIS! Just all of this is wonderful and shows just how much Isabella learned from her children who once defeated her.
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- To fully gain the women’s trust, she gives them Ray’s farewell note that he originally left in order to bait Krone, as proof she won’t double-cross them at any point.
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- I love the fact that she kept the note close to her because it acts just like all the other various toys and items she saved in her secret room back at plant 3. The original owners were all precious to her so she kept a piece of them behind to remember them in a place only she knew about. As I said before when mentioning her “I wish I could have just loved them normally” quote, all the love she had for her children had to be suppressed when she was under the system’s control, but that doesn’t mean she never cared. Because she did, and if I haven’t made at least that clear by now then I’m failing.
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- Can her intentions and love for her children be any more clear? (possibly, i’m not done with this darn post yet. how you guys holding up? i’m going a little insane at this point.)
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- Anyways! Second season didn’t make the rest of the story easy so apologies for any timeline mishaps as I switch between both anime and manga events from here on out.. like how in manga Isabella is informed of the escapee’s return to Grace Field via Peter, while the in the anime it’s her who helps lures them back with a fake transmission via the radio they stole.
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- Just before Emma & the others do return to Grace Field on November 13, Isabella finally reaches out to the farm’s many other Sisters to recruit them. She waited until the right moment to inform them of her crazy takeover plan so Peter wouldn’t become suspicious from all of headquarters acting/thinking differently (you know, like how Emma kept the jailbreak plan under wraps until the night of). These ladies also feel a bit wary and even think of Isabella’s offer as a joke, but with some real, heartfelt encouragement, she manages to win over every single woman to her side.
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- The moment when it was first revealed to us that she was not only still alive but was also promoted to Grandma is still so powerful.
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- She snaps Nat’s finger back into place after Peter broke it. (and considering emma’s group infiltrates the farm right after this, i’m pretty sure that ch170 with rallying the sisters took place before this..i think?)
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- Gave me a minor heart attack.
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- *CLAPS FRANTICALLY!!!* The moment she truly won me over.

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- While her betrayal against Peter in the manga is fantastic and quite possibly one of my favorite moments, the anime did give us a little something too. It shows Peter spewing utter nonsense to Emma about how she’s destined to fail, only for best girl to bite back with such a fantastic quote, and then Isabella drops the act and switches sides. While I agree Emma’s comeback is “wonderful,” it’s the English dub that completely wins me over in this scene by having Isabella comment “Now that’s my girl” instead, like bro.. hearing that makes me so happy.
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- For real dude, you have several highly skilled women pointing guns at you, I think her betrayal is crystal clear.
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- This is like the perfect example of how she had to conceal her feelings while bound by the system. She just misses these kids so much y’all but she can’t let her true emotions show yet.
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- Having her call Peter a boy is beyond hilarious to me. Also, how she disagrees with him on so many levels is excellent, like how he believes in experimenting on kids and having the right to call yourself their parent just because you created them, while Isabella believes in raising and loving children normally and that you earn that parent title by actually being part of their lives. To be fair they both inflicted pain on kids (Nat’s finger/Emma’s leg) but Peter’s action was a mistake in itself. Isabella got frustrated back when Krone even threatened to ship out the kids who discovered the secret, so you can bet she’s probably pissed off at this boy for harming one of her kids on purpose.
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- The best mother-daughter moment ever! It’s such a shame it never got truly animated since the second season decided not to give the children guns, but we get to see a small smile from Isabella after Emma decided to still call her “mom.”
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- The anime never gave Peter the chance to run away, like he (somehow) managed to do in manga, so we had the chance to see someone actually shoot at him. Well, in his general direction at least. Isabella lands a perfect shot not even a full second after he pulls out that disc. Accuracy on point.
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- Said this once or twice in the past in manga so I’m glad the anime brought it back.
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- Remains cautious and keeps her gun raised at Peter when Emma approaches him and rightfully so considering he still had his knife hidden at this point.
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- Refuses Emma’s offer to join the kids in the human world at first because she knows that her (& the sister’s) actions shouldn’t be forgiven so easily, but with some rather blunt sympathy from Ray and encouragement from her other children, she finally gives in.
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- This entire post summed up in one image.
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- She apologizes even though distancing herself from her kids and preparing them for death were just required of her role as a caretaker. She wouldn’t have done any of that in a normal world. (do i sound like a broken record yet? probably)
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- The emotion you hear in her voice during this entire dub scene hits my heart in all the right places.
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- She still thinks of Leslie after all this time and I think that’s real cute.
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- Her protective nature is on full display when she protects Emma from this bastard of a demon. A truly surprising and heartbreaking moment, considering this is the woman who’s survival used to be her top and only priority in the past, but now doesn’t hesitate to give her life in order to save her kid (and by extension that small girl emma saved. also, major heart attack for me).
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- Despite being critically injured, this woman still possess enough strength to hold back a demon twice her size. She doesn’t even pay any mind to its nonsense. Like the demon, people often think this is when redemption arc starts but I believe it started way back in ch37 when Isabella retrieved and hid the ropes the kids used to escape. Ever since she admitted defeat on the wall that night, she threw caution to the wind and began cheating the system in hopes to one day assist the kids achieve a brighter future. Despite all the work she’s done behind the scenes, Isabella believes there’s still so much more she can do to atone, so even though she’s already received the children’s forgiveness, she continues to assist them by jumping in and saving them directly from demons for once in her life.
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- Ma’am it’s sweet you’re so concerned with their safety, but we should be asking you that question ya know? (but then again emma was the same way after she woke up from her coma).
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- Knows that just apologizing and saving Emma isn’t enough to suddenly forgive all her actions and wants to do so much more for the children as a result. Even though I already acknowledged all her subtle and hidden moments, I wish we got to see her care for them more openly.
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- I simply can not read through ch177 and not get emotional. No matter how hard I try, I always feel tears start to form in my eyes. Oh my god, how cruel that death can be this beautiful. It’s so unfair.
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- *uses old chapter review because I’m too upset right now* “She apologizes for everything. For not treating him right and loving him as a mother normally would her own son. For making him despise his life so much and enduring so much pain that he thought the only escape was suicide.”
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- “She leaves him with one last wish to protect everyone, and that completely breaks me because you know exactly how much they both care for their family. Not only would they literally die for their family, but they would live for them too if someone asked. Truly like mother, like son.” (aaaaaahhhhh)
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- Her, umm.. ghost (along with Conny’s & Yuugo’s) help Ray reunite with Emma in 2049.
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- All my tears aside, the anime did something right by actually keeping her ALIVE!
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- Have you ever seen something so GODDAMN BEAUTIFUL in all your life?? This image is so powerful it literally tossed aside any salty feelings I had that night with how the second season ended. Seeing her like this grants me so much happiness y’all, it’s truly unbelievable. I still can’t get over it and hopefully I never will.
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Okay, now I’m done, thank god. Sorry this is like ridiculously long, especially since she’s absent for sooo many chapters. Also find it so hilarious how drastic my opinion of her changed from the beginning to now, from “bitch” to “oh my god I love her so much.” I know people will always have opposing opinions whether she’s actually a good mother or not and that’s totally fine. Wasn’t trying to convince y’all of that either because yes, some of her actions are real unforgivable, but she was suffering under the farm system too and just followed through with what she was trained to do in order to survive, but while other Sisters fought to climb ranks and help themselves survive, Isabella ultimately wanted the best for her children. The more power she gained, the more risks she took and once the system crashed so did her facade.
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An absolute queen.
73 notes · View notes
shurisneakers · 4 years
Text
shut in [9]
Summary: When your high profile mission goes terribly wrong, you’re forced to hide in a safehouse with a man you’ve never met before. With seemingly nowhere else to go, you’re forced to work together to figure out who is trying to have you assassinated before it’s too late. (Sam Wilson x Reader, Hitman AU)
Warnings: cursing, anxiety, ptsd, shooting
Word count: 2.8k
A/N: ok ok ok ok sam deserves the world and im mad that he’s not getting it
i also appreciate feedback so if you would like to, please consider dropping me an ask or comment ly guys!!
here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333
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Previous Part || Shut In Masterlist
He was gone.
10:00am
Time had begun to slip past you. Days where you were forced to wake up at 4am were just a dreary memory you didn’t want to revisit. The rough shoves in the morning to have you awake enough to be in training by 4:30am only fell into the category of things you had forgotten over the time you had stayed here.
Maybe sleep wasn’t a luxury you weren’t allowed to afford.
10:30am
By the time you step into the kitchen, the loose structure of the day you had ahead of you was forming. Maybe if you revisited the small makeshift shooting range you had set up for Sam and you to practice. A couple of old soup cans, a flat boulder for them to sit on and you were good to go. He had allowed you to use his giant board for knife throwing too, laughed when you asked for permission before saying it was for the both of you. 
You made a sandwich for yourself, forcing it down your throat with water. Bread was starting to feel like cardboard and the jam just tasted like nothing. Peanut butter was even worse.
Losing appetite wasn’t an option, even though it had eroded a while ago. The best option was to just scarf it down with water. 
11:00am
Sam isn’t in the house, you had deduced. A morning run or maybe just some fresh air.
You checked for the notes he sometimes left for you when he went out. Something along the lines of when he’d be back, or why he’d left, or where you could find him. 
You looked on top of the fridge where he generally left them; someplace he knew you’d see. You didn’t find one.
You shrugged it off. 
Something felt wrong about the arrangement of the kitchen but you couldn’t place a finger on what it was. All the chairs were in its place, trash appropriately in the bin, no bowls were left from soup day in the sink to wash. 
The origami swan you had made still rested next to his paper airplane. Nothing seemed wrong or out of place. 
You pushed yourself to shake off the nerves, to get dressed instead. The shooting range was waiting for you.
12:45pm
When you shoot for thirty and get all thirty, it tends to get a little boring. Not that you were complaining; if even one was off you’d spend the whole day trying to make up for it.
Violent hobbies weren’t ideal. They weren’t even hobbies per se. Just skills you needed to keep sharp if you wanted to survive.
You even shot at the targets that you had hung up on the trees. Dangerous and completely Sam’s idea. Said the wind made them act like moving targets. Nevermind the possibility of a ricochet.
The target board was empty too. Admittedly, knife throwing was a little harder  to get used than shooting to but it still only took a few tries before you were hitting bullseye over and over again.
There just wasn’t anything to do. And you realised it had been this way for a while but you never noticed due to his lively chatter or how competitive it got with stupid games you were making up as you went. 
1:00pm
You learned against the counter as you ate, eyeing the room, trying to figure out what you had misplaced. The air was cold, even more so after the shower, so you threw on an extra t-shirt to aid you.
You made a noise of disapproval when you couldn’t find what was wrong. A quick wash of your hands before you made your way to the TV, fully intending to doze off while watching Megamind for the fourth time. 
You passed by the mini fridge on the way, noting how you needed to restock the ice cubes when you suddenly stopped in your path.
Your eyes peeled back to the small paper bowl Sam had crafted expertly that was still somehow managing to stick together. But that was what was wrong.
The keys were missing.
The fucking car keys and the pocket change you had taken from Pierce’s house were no longer there. 
Your body moved on autopilot, dragging you towards the front door. You yanked it open, door creaking under the pressure you applied on it.
Your heart sank. 
The car was gone.
1:20pm
You had all the possibilities listed out in front of you with the rest scratched out after you had rationalised it.
Someone had come in and taken the car, which wasn’t likely. 
Sam had stepped out but hadn’t mentioned it to you. If he did, why would he need the car?
Someone had abducted Sam, which was absurd on paper but still left a twinge of uncertainty because you couldn’t definitively rule it out. 
He had just left. Decided he was done and left. 
You stared at the last option. 
“Fuck,” you cursed.
You could feel his muscle shift as he looked at you. 
“What’s wrong?” 
You opened your mouth but shut it again. How do you explain it to him without sounding utterly ridiculous?
You wondered if it was that conversation. 
He wouldn’t leave after you told him, would he?
You hesitated before shaking your head.
He’d come back. He would.
1:45pm 
You had added a few more possibilities to the list but discarded it almost immediately.
You now found a place in front of the TV, watching but not registering what was said. Your fingers kept itself busy by playing with the hem of your shirt. You had thrown another one on since his jacket was missing with the rest of him. It had gotten colder.
The woman droned on about how much her husband loved the recipe she was making. It was Sam’s favourite segment, not because it was particularly fantastic or anything, but because it gave him forty five minutes of free content to trash talk.
Your eyes kept glancing up at the clock. Was it broken or was time much slower than you initially thought?
You almost felt like you were in a cognitive dysfunction; you couldn’t do anything other than while away time till you figured out what had gone wrong. 
2:00pm
If you weren’t paying attention, you wouldn’t have heard the soft crunch of twigs. The whirring of the wheels as it turned gently only made you sit up straight, hands on the gun that rested on the couch beside you.
It came to a stop. The gun was fully in your grip now, TV turned off to determine what the noises were.
It was the most agonisingly slow minute you spent listening as the car opened and shut, muffled by the distance. You were near the door, using the adjoining wall as a hideaway. 
The doorknob shook as someone tried to push their way in. 
“Sam?” you called out cautiously against your better judgement, mentally cringing. 
It took a second for his reply to return. 
“Hey, sweetheart. Let me in, will you? Stupid door’s not opening.”
Of course it wouldn’t. It was fingerprint activated.
Relief flooded your system, letting yourself hold the gun with only one hand as you hastily made your way to open the door.
However, you paused. As much as you wanted to fling the door open blindly, you waited, hand on the knob.
“Is someone out there with you?”
“What?” he sounded confused. “No, it’s just me.”
You opened the door slightly, peeking out through the sliver of open space. 
Sure enough, it was only him. The car was returned to the same spot that it was.
“Where were you?” You yanked the door open. You sounded way more aggressive than you planned to, you were sure. It didn’t matter though.
“Went to the store,” he said nonchalantly, stepping inside, and dropping the keys back where they were.
“What?” 
He was so relaxed about it, like it was nothing. It only irked you further than you already were.
“Drove the car till the highway, walked into town and went to the store.” He set the bag down. “What’d you do all day?”
“You went to the town,” you emphasised. “To the fucking store.”
“Yeah, I figured you would be up by the time I came back.”
“You were gone for hours.” You crossed your arms over your chest, fighting the urge to yell. You could talk it out calmly. You didn’t have to snap
You hoped he had a good reason. You sincerely hoped, for his well being and security, that he risked his life to go to public space.
“We’re way further out than you think. Nearest dollar store’s almost the next fuckin’ state if you’re walking. Had to ditch the car because it’s a little too flashy, even for me.” He lifted up the bag next to him. “Got us some ramen. And juice. That’s all we had cash for anyway.”
You stare at him, mouth slightly agape. 
“You could have been seen, Sam,” your tone was corrosive, the next best you could do instead of yelling. “For all we know, you could have been followed.”
“No one followed me. I made sure.”
That did nothing to alleviate the anxiety that was crawling into your head. 
“You’re ridiculous,” you muttered. “Fucking ridiculous.”
“Where are you going?” You ignored him, turning on your heel and walking to the bedroom. You didn’t care if it was his day that day. He could rot in the kitchen with his stupid ramen for all you cared.
You cursed as you slammed the door behind you, launching yourself onto the bed. 
There was no denying you were relieved that he was still alive and here. But fuck him. Fucking dickhead. 
Fucking juice.
You spent the next couple of hours feeling absolutely embarrassed for yourself. Why did you spend hours worrying if he was safe when he was out there, gallivanting in public for some stupid noodles?
Both of you could have been absolutely fucked if he wasn’t careful. He may have just jeopardised your entire set up.
But deep down, no matter how much it was annoying to acknowledge, you knew he wouldn’t have. He was smart, strategic. 
Why would he do something like this?
How much you were worried scared you. There was no time where it had occurred that maybe you were in danger too. Every possibility you came up with only pushed the thought of him possibly in trouble further into your head. 
But the more you spend time overthinking, the more you realised that him being in danger wasn’t the entire cause of your worry. 
What if he didn’t come back? Why’d he come back? 
He had the means to leave, the will to and clearly was able to go undetected for a while. He didn’t need to return, but he did. 
And for what; to give you some food he bought from the dollar store. 
He seemed excited about it too, before you had closed the door on his face and decided to spend the next few hours self-destructing.
Fucking ramen.
Maybe if you could just lie there until you decomposed, then you wouldn’t have to have a conversation with him about this. That’s what you would have done a couple of months ago. 
But now the idea of communicating had been implanted and implemented several times before. It didn’t feel right to push it away, not when you’d come so far. A chance to heal.
You groaned, shoving a pillow onto your face before getting up grumpily. 
Fuck this man and his stupid, healthy methods of coping. 
___
You opened the door slowly, creeping into the hallway to assess what he was doing. It had been a few hours of silence in the house. He had given you space, not come knocking on the door to explain himself. 
You took note of the kitchen. The table had been laid with two bowls of noodles covered with a plate along with a glass each of juice. It was domestic. Cute.
He was watching Die Hard but the volume was turned down low. If he was anything like you, he wouldn’t have been paying too much attention.
You cleared your throat awkwardly to grab his attention.
His neck craned to look at you, surprise flashing across his face for a second before he leapt up, turning off the TV in an instant.
“Y/N,” he stated as normally as he could.
“Samuel,” your tone was steady. 
He scratched the back of his neck nervously. “Wasn’t sure if you were gonna show up.” 
“Neither was I.” You looked at the table, gesturing towards it with your shoulder. “Watchu got there, Gordon Ramsey?”
Because screw him, but the longer you stood there staring at the bowl, you were starting to understand the lengths he went to to get something other than bread, peanut butter and soup. As much as the prospect of being petty thrilled you, you had survived on nothing but them for the past few weeks.
“Got a few packs of ramen and a gallon of juice from the store. Thought you- we deserve somethin’ nice.” You noticed his quick coverup but didn’t acknowledge it. “It’s not Michelin star worthy, but it’ll do.”
You nodded, avoiding looking at him.
“I-”
“Hey-”
Both of you started at the same time, only to be cut off by the other. You mentioned for him to continue.
“Listen, I’m sorry. I should have told you before I left,” You didn’t expect the sincerity that exuded from every word he let out and you found yourself unable to look away. “I’m not used to people worrying about where I go... but things are different now. I won’t do it again.”
You weren’t used to the feeling of lightness that accompanied an apology. Relief. 
“Thank you,” you said breathily. His face noticeably brightened. “But why’d you come back?”
His small smile left as soon as it came, as his face fell into a frown. “What?”
“You could have just left. You had the car, the-” you stopped yourself from listing out reasons why he should have. “Why’d you come back?”
He looked completely confused. 
“Because I wanted to,” he voiced. “Leaving you behind was never an option. I wouldn’t-”
He trailed off, eyes never leaving yours. 
“You’re stuck with me,” he urged softly. “We’re a team.”
You lingered on him longer than you wanted to admit. He wasn’t lying, you had realised. 
“Care to join me for dinner?” he asked, extending a hand to you.
You rolled your eyes but took it, feeling the heat creep up your neck. He smirked at you and fuck, he was frustratingly cute. 
You understood. You totally understood when you nearly died at the first bite you took, vowing to never take food like this for granted again. It may have been the absolute bare minimum; just the seasoning and noodles he had cooked in the microwave, but it was the best goddamn meal you ever had.
“Good, right?” He looked about as content as he could be. 
“Best fuckin’ day of my life.”
He kidded around some more. You choked out a laugh at some, wholly ignored the others to which he took complete offence. You saw it as a way to humble him.
This was the normalcy you had crushed your craving for so long ago, accepting that it wouldn’t ever happen. A normal dinner with someone who made you smile, no impending doom lurking around the corner and maybe a shot at a glimmer of something happy. 
It was strange that you found it with another hitman in a safe house, hiding from authorities and who knows what else, with food worth a couple of cents. You wouldn’t want it any other way.
Yet there were things that had to be discussed. Conversations that needed to happen.
“Sam, we need to talk about it.” You didn’t have to explain, he knew what you were talking about.
“What’s wrong?” 
“I need to tell you something and I need you to hear me out before saying anything,” you pulled away from him, shuddering at the sudden cold that enveloped you. 
“I’m listening.”
“We do,” he agreed, and you could feel the atmosphere in the room begin to shift. “But we don’t have to do it now.”
He reached across from where he was sitting, hesitantly interlacing your fingers. The sense of fluster you experienced wasn’t healthy, you decided.
You just ducked your head, fighting against the damn smile that was trying to make its way onto your face. You didn’t pull away.
“Okay.”
Next part
215 notes · View notes
wordsfromthesol · 3 years
Text
Reconciliation
Author: @wordsfromthesol Taglist: togasbetch @malfoys-demigod @pricetagofficial Pairing: Tim Drake x Reader Summary: You seek the help of an old friend when you accidentally end up in the middle of a blood bath. Word Count: 1.8k
It all started ages ago, when you walked into the same class as the infamous Timothy Drake. If it wasn't for the Wayne Grant, your parents would never have been able to send you to such a fancy school…not that you understood that at 5 years old. Since that day the two of you were inseparable. You had practically lived at Drake Manor, and when Mr. Freeze killed your parents, you did. Not that Jack and Janet had any idea.
A few years later Jack and Janet were gone and Tim was taken in by none other than Bruce Wayne himself. Thankfully, Tim let you remain in his house. At first, everything was normal, but after the first year, he started to visit you less and less. He became more distant and secretive with each interaction and eventually, he stopped coming altogether. You made the decision to leave once you graduated high school, after all, it had been over a year since Tim had bothered to come see you. What would he care?
You jumped on a bus, clutching a backpack full of your belongings…and a few things from the Drake Manor. Somehow you lucked into a full-time nanny job for some wealthy family a few hours away. You were afforded a small living quarters, a stipend, and access to anything already at the mansion. The little girl was only 3 years old at the time. It's hard to believe that was 2 years ago.
You and Kaylee were upstairs when you heard a large group of people force their way through the front door. As you peaked out of the room, you saw a parade of people with their guns drawn. Immediately you rushed back into the room and whispered, "We are going to play a game."
"Game?" The child's ears perked up. You nodded your head as you made your way to the window. Opening it, you slowly climbed out and motioned for her to follow. You had no idea how long you stayed up there, pressed against the side of the house praying no one came looking. Eventually, the noises had stopped.
"Wait right here for me, okay?" She nodded as you made your way back to the window. "Don't move a muscle until I come for you." Your mouth hung open as you descended the staircase. Bloodstained the room as bodies littered the floor. As you walked over to the filleted bodies of Mr. and Mrs. Barco, your vision blurred as you felt the back of a hand strike your face. Staggering backward, you opened your eyes to see a man grinning before you. His eyes trailed down your cheek and landed on the sizable ring that graced his own finger. You began to feel the warm blood drip down your cheek. A state of panic washed over you just as you felt your knuckles collide with his ribs. Dodging his next blow, you thrust your shoulder into him and grappled for the gun tucked in his waistband. He looked almost pleased as he stared down the barrel.
"Whatcha gonna do with that, hun?" When you refused to answer, he continued. "You know you're going to be dead soon. What's the point…" Your eyes locked onto his hand, which was slowly inching towards your own.
**
The ringing in your ears had just barely subsided when you reached the top of the stairs. You slowly climbed out the window and ushered Kaylee to come inside. Her feet had just touched the ground as the words lucidly fell from your lips. "I need you to promise me that you won't open your eyes. We are going on a surprise trip." If Kaylee could tell something was wrong, she wasn't letting you know. You walked as fast as you could with the small child on your hip.
Your mind had gone completely blank, your eyes glazed over as you drove. You didn't know where you were going, but your motions seemed instinctive. As you pulled up to the gates, everything began to wash over you. Pressing the call button, the only words you could stutter out were: "It's Y/N. I need Tim." Thankfully, the message worked and the gates began to open. You drove up to the ornate front door, but couldn't force yourself out of the car. A knock on the window shook you out of the trance. It was Alfred.
"Mx Y/N, welcome. Perhaps you and your guest would be more comfortable in the house. I have already summoned Master Timothy." You just nodded as you stepped out of the car. Every move your body made relied on muscle memory: opening the back door of the car, unfastening Kaylee's car seat, placing her on the ground beside you. Alfred led you inside to the kitchen before kneeling down and facing Kaylee. "And what is your name?"
"KAYLEEEE!" She gleefully screamed at him.
"Ahhh, Miss Kaylee. How would you like a snack?" Kaylee's eyes went wide as she furiously nodded her head up and down. Kaylee looked up to you for permission as Tim rounded the corner, already speaking.
"Alfred, what's so --" Tim froze as he saw you sitting at the kitchen counter.
"You my Y/N/N's friend?" Kaylee narrowed her eyes as she glared at Tim. Her eyes softened as Tim slowly shook his head yes. "Make sure they get ban aid. Prefably a princess one." Once satisfied, she turned her attention back towards Alfred and her snack.
**
You turned towards Tim, revealing the gash on your cheek surrounded by a newly forming bruise. Tim rushed to your side, grasping your hand in his, just as the words began spilling from your mouth. "Tim, I'm so sorry. I just didn't know where else to take her. They were dead..."You felt your body giving out, "all of them…"
"Calm down. We'll figure this out. You need rest." He refused to let you speak anymore as he scooped you up from the chair and carried you upstairs. Carefully, Tim sat you on his bathroom counter and began cleaning the wound. Once it was bandaged he brought you over to the bed. "Now what happened?" He looked at you, his heartbreaking as he watched the tears fall from your eyes.
"They're dead. So many bodies. Tim, I can't see anything but blood." You collapsed into his chest, trying to conceal the overwhelming panic.
**
You had no idea how long you stayed like that, all you know is you woke up with Kaylee cuddled to your chest and Tim sitting at the adjacent desk.
"Tim?" His eyes shot up at the sound of your voice. You slowly got up and walked down the hall and into the study. You didn't check to see if Tim was following you, but you knew he was. Ignoring the unknown man already occupying the room, you continued onto the balcony. "I just don't know what happened." Your eyes glazed over as you stared into the distance. You knew if you looked at Tim, you would break down again. "People stormed in with guns. Me and Kaylee hid. Once I came back in, everyone was dead. Her whole family. Their security team. Everyone. And then this man came up and struck me. I thought I was dead. All I could think of was Kaylee, sitting on the roof, alone, confused. And I shot him." You turned around and stared into Tim's dark blue eyes. "They're going to kill me now. Aren't they?" The tears bubbled up, but you refused to let them fall.
"Y/N, how much did you know of that family?" Concern laced his voice. That voice that you hadn't heard in years. That voice that used to be your home.
"They were rich and needed a nanny." You looked down at your fiddling fingers, "I didn't have many options, so I didn't ask any questions."
Tim took a deep breath, pushing down his anger. "They are…were one of the biggest crime families in the country." The words rang in your mind as you forced your eyes back on the horizon. You didn't even realize Kaylee had woken up and walked into the study. Or that the unidentified man took her by the hand and led her from the room carrying a fairytale book. "You really didn't know?" Tim's brows furrowed.
Too many emotions were spinning around your head until one of them exploded. "Why the fuck would I know that?!" You made no attempts to sedate your anger.
"You worked for them for years, Y/N!"
"Well clearly you knew, so maybe an old friend should've warned me!" The anger wasn't geared towards him, not really. Though seeing him again, feeling all this again, that's something you never thought you'd have to do. And that was just the icing on the cake. An eerie silence blanketed the air. "I shouldn't have come here," you mumbled before turning to leave. "I shouldn't have put you in danger."
**
Tim stood stoic as your words played over and over in his mind. He never told you of his nightly activities for this exact reason. So you wouldn't be thrust into this chaotic world. And now here you are, begging for his help, and he let you walk away. Again.
A pillow slammed into his face, knocking him from the stupor. "Probably not a good idea to let them leave. Love of your life, Barco heiress, not a great combination."
"Shit." Tim pushed past Jason, ignoring his snide remarks because unfortunately, he was right. Tim grabbed your arm just as you opened the front door. "Wait!" Tim yelled as he pushed the door closed. "I can't let you leave."
"Wh --"
"Look," Tim cut you off and began pulling you through the house. "I need to show you something."
**
"Where…where am I standing right now?"
"The Batcave." His voice faltered as he stopped in front of his Red Robin costume.
"So you're a superhero? Are you kidding me?"
"I don't have any powers, so I don't think I would qualify…" Tim's voice trailed off as he watched your eyebrows raise and a disapproving smirk form. "Anyways. I can help. I want to help."
"I can't ask you to do that." You tried to turn away, but Tim laid his hands on your shoulders. His eyes lingered on yours.
"You were supposed to be safe. Away from me. That's the only reason I let you go. I was wrong. You're safer with me and I'm not letting you go again."
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puckinghell · 4 years
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Acts Of Service | Elias Pettersson
Summary: When people have different love languages, sometimes it’s hard to understand what the other is trying to say. 4 times Elias shows you he loves you, and the 1 time you tell him.  Words: 7.5k (whoops) Note: This concept was very interesting to explore. Also yes, this entire thing was written because of that one picture of Elias in that blue sweater stepping out of the car like a fucking GQ model. 
----
(Some time ago)
“Didn’t you say there’s an apartment free in your building?” Brock asked as soon as you answered the phone, forgoing the “hello”.
“Hello, Brock, my very good friend, how nice to talk to you! How are you doing?” you deadpanned.
At least he had the decency to sound ashamed. “Ah, yes, hi. Sorry. I’m just in a hurry and it’s important.”
You frowned. “Why? Are you looking to move?”
“No.” Brock laughed. “Stetch would kill me. No, it’s about the rookie. Petey? I told you about him. Swedish, quiet, best fucking hands in the league.”
Yes. Brock had told you about the rookie, although you still thought it dumb to call him that. Brock was basically still a rookie himself.
“What does that have to do with my apartment building?”
“He said no to having a billet family but everyone on the team thinks it’d be good for him to have someone to kinda look out for him a bit. He’s never been to Canada before this, you know, and he’s never lived on his own either. His English isn’t that great and everything is new for him. And since you’re such a caring, loving person, we thought…”
“You thought I could babysit him?” you finished for Brock.
“It’s not babysitting. Just, being friendly if he needs anything. Obviously we’re there for that too, but it’d be nice to have you so close by.”
Close by would be an understatement: the free apartment was across the hall from yours.
You weren’t sure if this sounded like something that you would necessarily want to do, but you did feel a bit sorry for Elias: you’d met him at a team thing earlier that week and he’d looked completely lost in the midst of all the Canadian hockey slang that you barely managed to follow, even after having been friends with Brock for years. He mostly kept to Eagle, spoke in Swedish, and his eyes flickered nervously across the room whenever anyone else approached him.
“Fine,” you sighed, “I’ll talk to my landlord. But you owe me, Blondie.”
Brock was happy enough that he didn’t even call you out on the nickname.
1. 
“Have I told you lately how much of a lifesaver you are?” You lean across your desk, resting your chin in your hands. Elias looks mildly amused as he hands you the papers.
“Nearly every day,” he says, “but then I save your life every day, so that seems fair.”
You grab the papers from his hands.
“You’re a lifesaver and the love of my life, Petey.”
You think back to when Elias just moved into your apartment building, only because Brock thought he needed someone to look after him. You could laugh, now, thinking about how wrong he’d been.
Elias is the most self-sufficient, independent person you know. You don’t think he’s ever needed anything from anyone. Like in hockey, where he can make the play and score the goal all at the same time, Elias has his life together.
Unlike you.
Despite the fact that Elias hadn’t needed much help from you, you had become very fast friends. His quick witted sarcasm always managed to make you laugh and he liked how upfront and honest you were with him about things. It was easy, too, to spend time together. With him living just across the hall, you found yourself wandering to his apartment whenever you were bored, and he showed up at yours often when he didn’t feel like cooking.
Just because he could cook, didn’t mean he always wanted to.
And ever since the two of you had become friends, Elias had your back. When you needed someone to water your plants, or feed your cat Puck – Brock had named him – or, apparently, bring you the important work papers that you forgot at home after having worked on them all weekend.
You groan as you flick through the papers. “I thought I was going to die. Without these I can’t finish my presentation.”
“When is it?” Elias asks, eyes searching behind you. You know he’s looking out for your asshole of a boss, who will use any excuse to yell at you, especially the unannounced visit of a friend.
“Tomorrow. I got all the content in these papers here, but I still have to make the PowerPoint.” You sigh. “It’s still so much work.”
“Oh.” Elias’ face lights up. “Almost forgot. Brought you this.” Triumphantly, he reaches down and comes up with a paper bag from your favorite coffee shop.
The words fall off your lips in a gasp. “You didn’t!”
“Strawberry scone and a large caramel macchiato with soy milk.” Elias grins. “I also got you a chocolate chip cookie for later.”
“Marry me,” you proclaim, as you make grabby hands for the bag. The coffee is precisely what you need and your mouth is already watering at the idea of the food.
“Get me a ring, then,” Elias jokes, as he starts getting up from the chair.
Something tightens in your stomach, so you quickly take a bite of the scone: anything to push those feelings to the side. It works a little, and at the very least it tastes amazing.
You’re just friends. If you were gonna be anything more, Elias would’ve made a move already. Or, if you’d been brave enough, you would’ve: but he’s never said anything to make you think he’s interested and quite frankly, you’re not that brave.
“Thank you,” you say, mouth still full of scone, and Elias wrinkles his nose at that as you knew he would.
“I’m going to the store now,” he says, “anything you want me to pick up for you?”
“Wine?” you ask, hopeful. “I’m gonna need it after today.”
Elias rolls his eyes at you, but when you come home after the most grueling day at work there’s a bottle of rosé sitting in your fridge, next to a bag full of your favorite Thai take out food.
Love you, you quickly text Elias, even though you know he can’t answer because the game is about to start.
You take some time showering and putting on comfortable clothes, then situate yourself on the couch and put on the game. It has already begun, and you know it’s not gonna be an easy one, against the Bruins.
It’s not until the first intermission, when you check your phone, that you see there’s a reply from Elias waiting for you.
It’s just a simple heart emoji, but it makes your heart race anyway.
2.
“This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“I can barely hear you.” Fiona’s tone is disapproving, and you pull your mouth away from where you’d pressed it into your arm to scream.
“I said, this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me!”
She laughs. “It’s just a car, Y/N.”
You don’t necessarily like your job, but Fiona is one of the reasons you’re still putting up with it. She’s not just a colleague anymore, slowly turning into a friend and someone you confide into about everything – even about your Elias problem – and you love her, but sometimes you could murder her.
“It’s not just a car,” you bite. “It’s my only mode of transportation, because you know how much I hate taking the bus, and it’s broken, and I probably can’t even afford to get it fixed. And now I have to walk home, and it’s raining.”
“Well, when you put it like that,” Fiona admits.
After a long day at work, you couldn’t wait to get home and watch The Bachelor until you fell asleep, your cat in your lap. However, when you finally got away from the office and stepped into your car, it was clear the universe had different plans.
It didn’t start.
After trying approximately 15 times, you’d screamed, nearly cried, hit the steering wheel, and then went back inside to scream and cry a little more at Fiona’s desk.
“I just wanna go home, Fi.” You know you sound miserable, but you honestly can’t help it. Taking the bus always heightens your anxiety, so you avoid it at all costs: however, walking home in this pouring rain doesn’t seem like much fun either.
And Fiona can’t even bring you home, because she takes the bus to work like a normal person.
“There’s a simple solution to this, you know,” Fiona says. She starts to organize the papers on her desk, a clear sign that she’s getting ready to leave the office as well. “You could just call…”
“No,” you interrupt her, knowing exactly where she’s going with this. “I can’t call Elias. He’s got the boys over today and I won’t interrupt his fun with my misery. Besides, he does too much for me already, I can’t ask him for more.”
“Right,” Fiona drawls, “but when he hears that you were stuck here and didn’t call him…”
She doesn’t finish her sentence, but she doesn’t have to.
Elias would be furious.
One time, you were on a night out when you got a little too tipsy and didn’t realize your phone had died. By the time you noticed, all your friends had already jumped in their respective Ubers, but you had been too busy chatting with some girl you didn’t know to order yours, and now you couldn’t because you didn’t have a phone. 
You knew you could’ve asked any random person to order you an Uber, or at least to borrow their phone to call Elias – it’s not like you didn’t know his number by heart – but that felt like too much. It had been 3 am and he had a game the next day, so you decided to walk home.
When he found out the next day, he got so mad he didn’t talk to you for 4 days. Eventually, you couldn’t take it anymore and just sat on his couch pouting at him until he spoke to you again.
“Something could’ve happened,” he’d muttered, explaining to you why he got mad in the first place. “And I’m your best friend, and you should know me enough to know that I would much rather you wake me up than you walk home alone.”
You did know that, and he was your best friend, and you’d promised him you’d never do it again.
It’s only that promise, that causes you to reach for your phone.
“I’m texting him, but if he’s busy, I’m walking,” you tell Fiona stubbornly. She ignores you, which is probably fair enough.
Hey, you busy right now? Are the guys still there?
The answer comes right away. What’s wrong?
Damn, he knows you too well. You quickly explain the situation and before you know it, Elias is on his way to come get you, and Fiona is bidding you goodbye after you promise her you’re fine on your own for the twenty minutes it’s gonna take Elias to get there.
You’re just checking your email on your phone when you hear the bell at the front door.
“I’m coming!” you call out. You hurry to grab your bags and then walk quickly to the door, where Elias is standing with his car keys between his fingers.
“So Bella finally gave up, huh?” he asks, a sly little smirk on his face. He always teases you with the fact that you named your car.
“Yes, and I know you told me,” you sigh, and it’s clear that he immediately – and correctly – reads your mood.
Without a word, he opens his arms, and you gratefully fall into them, hugging him tightly to your body. There’s very little in the world that brings you more comfort than one of Elias’ hugs: although being on Elias’ couch wearing one of his old hoodies watching some stupid reality show might come close.
“Let’s go home,” Elias finally mumbles, and he holds out an umbrella when he lets you go.
It’s raining really hard, and you know he has to park his car a little bit away because there’s no parking in front of your office, so you take it.
“You could’ve just called, I would’ve ran out,” you tell him sternly, but he shrugs.
“But then how would you have gotten the umbrella?”
You would tell him you’re not made of sugar, but as soon as you step outside the rain clatters loudly against the fabric of the umbrella and you realize you would’ve really, really hated to not have it, so you stay quiet.
Instead, you walk after him as he runs to his car and opens the passenger door for you. It’s still running, and the heater is on: only then do you realize you’re quite cold.
This morning they said it would be nice outside, so you didn’t bother to take a coat.
It’s quiet in the car for a while, but it’s not uncomfortable. It’s the silence that only comes when two people understand each other, and combined with the soft music that is playing on the radio it lulls you into a false sense of comfort.
Until you realize something.
“Oh God,” you groan, “I’m gonna have to call someone to tow Bella to a mechanic.”
Elias raises an eyebrow. “Well, you could just leave her there.”
Normally you would’ve at least playfully punched his arm for the sarcastic tone in his voice, but right now you’re too busy freaking out.
“And how am I gonna get to work tomorrow? Don’t you dare say you’ll bring me cause I know you’ve got morning practice and it’s super out of your way. Fuck, why did this have to happen to me?”
You let your head fall against the window. The glass is cold against your cheek and it’s enough to stop the spiraling in your brain at least for a second.
“Hey.” Elias’ voice has lost all sarcastic edge. It’s gentle now, and he’s speaking low as if not to startle you. “Don’t worry about it, okay? I’ll call the tow truck and the mechanic and get your car fixed. And Brock lives close enough that he can take me to and from practice and you can just take my car to work.”
It’s… a reasonable solution, but once again something that Elias has to go out of his way for, even just a little bit, and you feel something warm bloom inside your chest.
“Okay,” you answer, the stress already ebbing away. “Thank you. You’re the best.” You reach out and place your hand on his knee, squeezing slightly. “Seriously. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Elias mumbles something incoherent. You think you see some color on his cheeks, but surely that’s just because the heater is on, because there’s no way he’s blushing over something you said.
You turn off the heater, and let your thoughts wander as Elias drives you home.
3. 
Traveling is fun, but traveling for work is instantly a lot less fun. You really don’t know how Elias does it.
You’re feeling run down and jetlagged when you come back from your work trip, which is ridiculous cause you flew to Toronto, not to freaking Europe. But it’s late at night and the three days you were away were so busy you can barely remember sleeping at all.
Fiona slept on the plane, so she looks a little more alive than you when your feet touch the ground at Vancouver airport.
“Is Elias coming to pick you up?” Fiona asks, as you’re both walking through the gate.
You shake your head. “I’m sure he would’ve insisted if he could, but he’s in California right now. They played the Kings tonight and they’re playing the Sharks the day after tomorrow.”
“I wish I was in California,” Fiona says wistfully. It’s cold and wet in Vancouver and it wasn’t much better in Toronto. The tiredness doesn’t help: it feels as if the cold of the night is slowly creeping into your bones.
“Come on then, I’ll drop you off.” You thank Fiona and follow her to her car. Normally you wouldn’t have minded taking an Uber, but right now you just wanna get to bed as soon as possible.
“If I fall asleep, just let me sleep here,” you mumble, resting your head back against the head rest. Fiona laughs as she starts the car.
“No way, you’ll freeze to death.” She squints outside. “Do you think it’s gonna rain?”
“It always rains,” you say, despite the fact that it’s not raining at the moment.
Fiona turns onto the highway. “So, are you finally gonna put up that bookcase you bought?”
Involuntarily, you groan. “Stop, don’t remind me.”
Your old bookcase is big and ugly, and it has been a thorn in your eye ever since you moved in. The person that lived there before you left it there, and you only kept it because you couldn’t really afford not to.
Four weeks ago, you finally allowed yourself to buy a new, prettier bookcase.
But…
“It’s just so big,” you whine, repeating the excuses you’ve been giving Elias every single time he raises a judgmental eyebrow at the old bookcase still standing in your living room. “It’s gonna take forever to take it apart and then it’s gonna take me even longer to somehow get it all downstairs and get rid of it.”
“And then you have to build the new one,” Fiona nods understandingly. “And you’re not good with furniture.”
“Hey,” you protest, but it’s weak. You’re not good with furniture, which was proven when you tried to help Fiona move in and didn’t manage to help her put together anything at all. Instead she ended up with a table with three legs. 
You even tried to read the manual, but it’s just not your forte.
“I’ll do it,” you add, “I promise you I will. Just, maybe not this weekend…”
Fiona laughs, but she doesn’t call you out on the fact that it probably won’t happen during the week either.
Finally, you arrive at your building. You can’t wait to go to bed, and you thank Fiona multiple times before dragging your luggage upstairs. When you open the door to your apartment, Puck comes running up to you, meowing and weaving between your legs.
“Don’t be dramatic,” you tell the cat sternly. “Petey sent me many pictures of you sleeping in his lap and I know he feeds you chicken when he thinks I won’t notice, so you got spoiled this week.”
You lovingly scratch Puck’s ears, before flicking on the light and kicking the door behind you in the lock.
Instantly, you notice the difference.
Your apartment isn’t big: real estate in Vancouver isn’t cheap and your job isn’t great. You got this place mostly for the location, and you like the big windows in the apartment and how it manages to get in light even during the darkest of winter days.
One corner of your living room, however, was always darker than the others. The bookcase took away the entirety of the white wall, and it created a dim lit, sad looking corner.
Now, it’s open and bright, as your new bookcase stands proudly in its place.
There’s only one person who would’ve done that.
The phone rings a few times, but you know the Kings game ended a while ago so you let it ring. After a while, Elias picks up.
“Sorry for the background noise,” is the first thing he says. “We’re on the plane. Taking off in a few minutes, probably.”
In the background, you hear some yelling. Probably Jake.
“You put up my bookcase,” you blurt out, ignoring Elias’ statement. “You put it up and all the books are in it and the other one is gone.”
Elias sounds a little smug when he answers. “Well, it’s not like you were ever gonna do it.”
“Thank you.” To your own horror, you can feel tears burning behind your eyes. “Elias, seriously…”
“It’s nothing.” You can hear Elias’ smile even over the phone: you know everyone always makes fun of his deadpan tone when he talks to media but with his friends, his voice always betrays everything he’s feeling. “I know you were worried about it, and I know how much you hated that old one.” He laughs. “I get why now, by the way. It took me and Brock like four hours to get that thing out.”
“Brock helped too?”
“He did.” Elias is silent for a while, but in the background you hear another voice. “Brock says to tell you that I forced him. But that’s not entirely true.”
Entirely. You know Elias definitely did force him.
“Tell him thank you too.”
“He says you’re welcome,” Elias says, quick enough that it makes you think Brock didn’t say that at all. “We’re about to take off so I have to put my phone on airplane mode. But call me tomorrow okay? I wanna hear about your work trip.”
“Okay.” For some reason, you can still feel the lump in your throat. You didn’t notice it momentarily, while you were focused on Elias’ and Brock’s bickering, but now it’s back, and with a vengeance.
Fuck. You just…
“I miss you.” You blurt it out before you can stop yourself and if anyone would ask, you would blame the exhaustion and the fact that Elias can’t see how wet your eyes are over the phone.
“I’ll be back soon,” he answers softly, and his voice is gentle in a way that makes you think he knows about the tears, anyway. “And when I am, we’re gonna take a whole night to eat food and stare at that bookcase, because it needs to be appreciated after the effort I had to put in to build it.”
You laugh before quietly saying goodbye to Elias and hanging up the phone.
In the kitchen, Puck sits in front of the fridge. When you open it there’s a pan with chicken.
For Puck the note next to it says, and you send Elias a picture of Puck with his chicken.
“He spoils you,” you tell your cat. You decide to ignore the fact that he kinda spoils you, too.
4. 
When you open the door to your apartment, you’re met with the smell of garlic.
After yet another shitty day at work, you can already feel the lump in your throat building again. You didn’t even tell him, this time. In fact, you carefully avoided his texts because you knew he’d clock that something was wrong.
Fuck. That’s probably where you went wrong in the first place; usually you never ignored Elias’ texts.
“Hello?” you call out into your own apartment.
There’s soft music playing and there’s light coming from the living room, but the amazing smell that tickles your senses is clearly coming from the kitchen, so that’s where you go.
Elias is standing at your kitchen counter, chopping a carrot.
“Hey,” he greets, smiling your way. “I’m making dinner.”
It’s almost too much, how domestic it looks. And how right: like he belongs there in your space, waiting for you to come home.
Suddenly there’s the overwhelming urge to go towards him, so you do. His arm immediately lifts, creating space for you in the crook of his body, and you slip under his arm easily.
“How did you know?” you mumble into the fabric of his worn Canucks hoodie. It smells like him, a scent that reminds you of home as much as your mother’s signature dish.
“You didn’t answer my texts,” Elias hums. His arm tightens around your body. “So I figured you could use some good food and a bath.” His head motions towards the general direction of the bathroom. “I’m running it as we speak.”
God. You love him.
It hits you, then. You knew you had a crush on him, knew you wanted to kiss him and hold his hand and feel his hands on you. But it’s more than that, now.
It’s the realization that you want to share everything with him. The ups and the downs. The bad nights and the bright mornings. You want him in your kitchen, but more than that, you want it to be his kitchen, too.
Fuck. You’re so royally screwed.
Because he does this, and he does so much for you, but he’s never said anything, anything at all, to indicate that he wants that. Or has even considered it, thought about it.
Maybe it’s never even crossed his mind. Maybe he takes care of you like he would take care of a sister.
“Hey.” Elias’ voice is gentle as it pulls you out of your thoughts, back down to earth. “You’re shaking. Go take a bath, and I’ll finish dinner, and then we’ll watch How I Met Your Mother. I wanted to watch the next episode but I waited for you.” His grin is a little lopsided. “Isn’t that chivalrous of me?”
It is, and normally you would tease him for it, but you can’t really think or speak, so you just nod.
“There’s wine in the fridge, if you want a glass,” Elias says. He holds out a wine glass, already waiting for you on the counter.
And who cares that it’s only a Tuesday: you deserve it, damn it, so you open the fridge to find the wine.
You’re met with more than just that.
“You bought groceries?” you ask, your eyes traveling through your fridge. You hadn’t gone grocery shopping in like a week, and when you left for work this morning the fridge was basically empty. Now it’s so full you wonder how you’re gonna close the door.
“How else was I gonna cook anything? You only had cat food left,” Elias tuts. You’re not surprised to find Puck at Elias’ feet, waiting for him to inevitably slip him some human food.
“Did you get…”
“Your coconut yoghurt? Yes.”
He did, and he got basically all your staples, and nothing you wouldn’t buy yourself.
“Honestly,” you say, as you finally reach for the bottle and pull your head out of the fridge. “I don’t know what to say, Petey. Thank you. I had such a sucky day and now it’s already endlessly better.”
This time you know you’re not imagining the flush on Elias’ cheeks.
“It’s fine,” he says. “You should go take that bath before it goes cold.”
You want to say more: to tell him time and time again how amazing he is, how much he means to you, how thankful you are. But you know once you start, you can’t be trusted to not say the one thing you don’t think he wants to hear.
So you say nothing, and simply go to take your bath.
+1
But you think about it.
You think about it all throughout Christmas, where you don’t see Elias at all. You think about it during NYE, when you get a drunk SnapChat from Elias with his brother, right at midnight.
At least, you figure, he’s not kissing any girls.
You’re not kissing any boys, either. You’re at a NYE party with Fiona and it’s fun, it is, but it’s not the same as it would be if Elias wasn’t all the way in Sweden.
You miss him like a limb, and you know it’s not fair because he rarely gets time to go home to Sweden and he deserves that time with his family, but you can’t say you didn’t wish his time off ended already.
When it finally does, it’s not Elias you see first. Troy is throwing a late New Years party, just to welcome everyone back to Vancouver as they get ready to start the season back up, and when you arrive at his house it’s early enough in the evening that there’s only a handful of people there.
“Y/N!” Brock calls out, opening his arms to give you a big hug as you enter. “Missed you!”
You laugh. “Get off of me, you giant. I’m gonna drop the wine.”
“Not the wine,” Troy says dramatically, tearing it out of your hands. His eyes are sparkling when he thanks and hugs you, and then Brock is ushering you into the living room, where Jake is talking with Quinn.
Or talking at Quinn. To be honest, you never really know when Quinn is paying attention.
“Y/N!” Jake exclaims, much like Brock had. “I’m glad you’re here, we need your input on something.”
“Okay?” you ask, curiosity instantly taking over. Whenever Jake and Brock get together, it promises to be an interesting evening.
“We’re trying to decide Brock’s love language.”
It’s sudden enough that you laugh. “His what?”
“Love language,” Jake explains. “Like, how he shows people he loves them. He says it’s quality time, but I think it could be physical touch. He’s always touching people.”
“Jake is deflecting because his love language is physical touch,” Brock scowls. “I think I know my own love language, Tuna.”
“Hold on.” Unfortunately, you have to press the pause button on their discussion. “What options do we have?”
You’ve got no idea where they got this from, but it doesn’t really matter. You’re always down to share your opinion on stupid stuff with your favorite boys.
“There’s gifts, quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, and…” Brock pauses, and you can nearly see the wheels in his head turning.
“Acts of service,” Quinn offers, which proves that he was actually paying attention.
“Mine is physical touch,” Jake says determinedly. “When I care about someone, I always wanna be touching them, and when I’m in love with someone that’s like twenty times worse.”
“Poor girl,” Quinn mutters, and the conversation gets paused in order for Jake to put Quinn in a headlock.
“I think yours is quality time, actually,” you tell Brock when Jake is done murdering the rookie. “Your ex was always on her phone during your date nights and I remember it drove you crazy.”
“See,” Brock says proudly. “Quality time baby. If I’m there I’m there.”
“What about yours, Huggy?” Jake asks. “Physical touch would make sense, since you’re called Huggy.”
“I’m not called Huggy,” Quinn deadpans. His face is devoid of any emotion, but you know him well enough to recognize the mischievous twinkle in his eyes. He reminds you of Elias, when he does that. “And if we were going by nicknames your love language would be fishing.”
Everyone cracks up on that, and then the doorbell rings and Bo arrives.
The topic gets put on hold, then, because Bo is instantly talking about Gunnar’s first Christmas and Brock is talking about becoming an uncle again and you feel warm and happy on the couch with your wine, squeezed between Brock and Troy.
Until, a little later, you realize someone is missing.
“Where’s Petey?” you ask Troy. “Isn’t he coming?”
Troy shrugs. “Should do. But you never know with Pete.”
It’s not entirely true: if Elias promises he’ll be there, he will be there. But, to be fair, he usually doesn’t promise that to anyone but you, and you hadn’t asked him to come, this time.
You figured he just would.
“What about Petey’s love language?” Brock asks idly, not knowing he’s opening Pandora’s box for you. “Definitely not words of affirmation, huh.”
Troy laughs.
“Nah, Petey’s an acts of service guy. He’s always doing shit for Y/N.”
You would protest if you trusted your voice not to shake. As it is, you stay quiet and hope the flush on your cheeks gets mistaken for a wine flush, and not an Elias flush.
Brock brightens. “Oh, yeah! Getting her car fixed, making dinner, building her stupid bookshelf, feeding her cat… He is a typical acts of service guy.” He bumps against your shoulder playfully. “I hope you appreciate his showing of love, Y/N. He rarely does that shit for me.”
Troy snorts. “That’s cause he’s not in love with you, Boes.”
“He’s not in love with me either!” you squeak, unable to stay quiet any longer. You know if you don’t derail this trail of thought very soon, it’s gonna end badly for you.
Both Troy and Brock look unimpressed, at that statement.
“Yes, he is,” Brock says slowly, as if explaining something to an unruly child. “He drops whatever he has going on to do small things that make your life easier. That’s literally the same as him screaming I’m in love with you from the highest rooftop in Vancouver.”
“He’s not like you,” Troy continues, a little more gentle. “When people have different love languages, they don’t always understand what the other is trying to say. Your love language is words of affirmation. You’re always telling Petey how amazing he is. But he doesn’t see that as a declaration of love, or whatever. He thinks you tell everyone that they’re amazing.”
You do, to be fair, but not as often as you tell Elias. Because he’s…
Well. Amazing would be an understatement, actually. He’s everything to you.  
Things are starting to make sense, like puzzle pieces fitting into place. Suddenly, you start wondering if there’s more to his acts of service than plain friendship, or him being a good guy.
It’s not like he does stuff like that for all his friends. He helps them out, sure, but he always goes above and beyond for you, usually not even needing to be asked.
But he’s not in love with you, surely? He hasn’t said anything…
But maybe words aren’t his thing. Not like they are yours: the way you can’t stop yourself from gushing into Elias’ ear even when you know you should stop.
What if Brock and Troy are right?
You don’t get much time to think it through, because that’s when Elias finally appears in Troy’s living room, looking endlessly cool in his blue sweater, wearing his glasses. He’s sending death glares at Jake, who wolf whistles from the corner, but then his eyes meet yours and they soften.
“Hi there,” he smiles, reaching out to you. You immediately jump up and launch yourself at him, any previous conversation about the two of you momentarily forgotten as you curl your body into his, his arms tightening around your waist.
“Missed you,” you hum into his shoulder, and you’re rewarded with a grin you can feel against the skin of your neck.
“Are you sure hers isn’t physical touch?” you hear Brock ponder, and you would flip him off if you could be bothered.
You can’t. All you can be bothered doing is plastering yourself to Elias’ side and not leaving him alone even for a second, the rest of the night.
It works at least for a while, until he asks: “Do you want another drink?”
“I’ll go with you,” you say, not willing to part with him yet, and you ignore the knowing look Brock shoots you as the two of you find your way to the kitchen.
Elias immediately goes for the wine, because he knows you better than anyone else.
“I asked my dad about the job,” Elias mentions casually, as if it’s not a big deal at all. “He thinks he can get you an interview.”
“Wait, what?”
Suddenly your heart is ticking in your throat. Before he left for Sweden, Elias had mentioned that his dad knows a guy who works for a similar company as you’re working for now: apart from the shitty boss you have or the ridiculous low salary you get paid. It’s your job, but better, and Elias promised you he’d get his dad to ask if there were any open positions.
There were. And you sent in your application not thinking there was gonna come much from it, but now…
Something warm washes through your chest, like your heart grew three sizes. Of course he asked, of course he made it happen. Looking out for you, always and at any time, from any distance.
“It’s not a done deal,” Elias warns, oblivious to your mental breakdown. “But he said he thinks they’ll like you and he’ll put in a good word for you.”
You squeal and throw yourself in his direction once again. Elias laughs as he catches you, fingers curling in your hair where your face is pressed against his chest.
“Thank you,” you mumble.
“It’s about time you get rid of that dumb job.” You can hear the frown in Elias’ voice. “They don’t take good care of you at all, it’s not good for you.” The distaste is obvious and it’s adorable. You pull away.
“I don’t need them to,” you say, carefully. You can still hear Brock’s words in your voice, and you figure it’s worth a try, probably. “Because you’re always there to take care of me.”
Elias’ cheeks darken substantially.
“I mean it when I say I don’t know what I’d do without you, Elias.”
“You’d be fine,” Elias waves away the compliment as you figured he would. But this time you’re not backing down.
“Maybe I would be. But I wouldn’t be as happy.”
They say when you really love a person, you’ve got to show them. But you’ve never really known how to do that, instead you always use your words to tell them. But it seems like Elias isn’t believing you, not even now.
And you’ve got to fix that.
It’s not until you’re in Elias’ car on the way back home that you bring it up again. The party wasn’t really the time and place, but the conversation with Brock and the guys has been nagging in the back of your mind since it happened.
If you didn’t realize Elias’ acts of service meant something, maybe he doesn’t realize your words of affirmation mean something. And even if it doesn’t mean he’s in love with you – you’re really not that sure about that – you need him to at least know how much you appreciate him.
“You know I’m always there for you, right?” you start, carefully breaking the silence in the car. Elias shoots you a glance from behind the steering wheel.
“What?”
“Like, even if I’m maybe not as good as you are at realizing what you need me to do, if there’s ever anything I can do to help make your life a little easier or better I wanna do it. I’d do anything for you.”
It’s too honest, probably, and too much all at the same time. But Elias doesn’t look that surprised. In fact, there’s a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
“You make my life better by just being you, Y/N. You don’t have to do anything for me.”
Butterflies erupt in your stomach and you wonder how you’re gonna get through this conversation. But it’s one that needs to be held, so you press on.
“What is your love language, Elias?”
Now he frowns. “Have you been talking to Brock?”
Of course Brock talked to Elias before he talked to you. The traitor.
You decide to ignore that, for now. You’ll talk to Brock later.
“You know my love language is words of affirmation, right?”
Elias shrugs. “Brock did say that, but I didn’t know what you thought it was.”
“And yours is acts of service,” you hazard a guess. You keep your eyes firmly on Elias’ face, which is the only reason you catch the slight change in his expression.
Like a wall, crossing over his features. He’s trying to protect himself, although you have no idea why. Does he not get where you’re going with this?
“I can tune it down if you want me to,” he says, a little grumpily. He’s staring straight ahead at the road, stubbornly refusing to look your way.
And oh God, he’s truly not getting it, and this is going the exact opposite way you want it to go.
Troy did say that when people’s love languages don’t match, they don’t understand what the other is trying to say. But you honestly don’t know how you can make it any more clear to Elias.
Well, except…
“I love you,” you blurt out. “Like, in love with you love you.”
The words ring loudly in the quiet car. For a second, nothing about Elias’ expression, almost like he didn’t hear you. You can almost feel your heart sink into your stomach.
Then, he pulls over the car.
It comes to a stop at the side of the road, two wheels on the pavement and two still on the road. It is, objectively, not super safe, but it’s also 3am and there’s no other cars to be seen. Very carefully, without looking at you still, Elias turns on the hazard lights.
And then finally, finally, he turns to you and kisses you.
You weren’t expecting it but it doesn’t really matter: it’s like your heart and head both light on fire, and everything outside of the car simply disappears. It’s just you and Elias, and his lips on yours and his hands on your body.
It feels right. Like it was always meant to end up like this.
After what feels like ages, he pulls away. He’s smiling, and his eyes are bright blue in the dark car.
“I thought you said those kinda things to everyone,” he admits, quietly. His thumb is rubbing your side, his eyes fixed on that spot. Almost as if he can’t really believe he’s allowed to do that.
You don’t want him to ever do anything else.
“I thought you did those kinda things for everyone,” you shoot back.
Elias raises one eyebrow. “That bookcase weighed at least 300 pounds.”
You can’t help it: giggles are escaping your lips and suddenly you’re both laughing. The tension in the car dissipates instantly, and suddenly it’s just Elias again, your best friend.
Your best friend that you’re now allowed to kiss. So you lean in and press your lips against his again.
After all, kissing is a love language you think everyone understands.
(+2)
“I’m home!” Elias’ voice sounds through the empty apartment, and you immediately leave your spot behind the kitchen counter to run into the hallway.
With a squeal, you fly towards him, and he catches you easily as you knew he would.
“Hey, babe,” he laughs quietly, pressing a kiss into your hair before returning the hug fully. “Is that my sweater?”
“Maybe,” you admit, as Elias’ hands make their way under his own blue sweater, that you definitely steal from him most evenings. “Missed you. And I’m very proud of you.”
“I missed you too,” he answers. “Watched the game?”
“Obviously.” You roll your eyes, even though you know he can’t see it with your face still buried in his shoulder. “A hat trick, huh? I think that needs to be celebrated.”
“Oh?” Elias pulls away then, one eyebrow raised and a cheeky twinkle in his eyes.
“Not like that,” you scold him, lightly punching his arm. “Or, maybe like that. But first, I made Kalops.”
At the mention of his favorite Swedish food, Elias’ face lights up. A while ago, you asked his mom for her recipe and it’s one of the only Swedish dishes you can make, but you make it well.
“Also,” you continue, as you take his hand and start leading him towards the kitchen, so he can sit at the counter while you cook as he always does, “I called the electrician so the TV is already fixed. I know you could have done it, but I decided I’d much rather use that time to hang out with you. I took Puck to get his shots at the vet and I also used my free afternoon to take your car through the car wash.”
When you reach the kitchen, you twirl around towards Elias and his arms immediately circle around your waist.
“You didn’t have to do all that,” he mutters, taking the opportunity to kiss you once more. “But thank you. I love that you took the time to take care of that for me. And I love you.”
“Look at us,” you tease, lightly tugging at the ends of Elias’ hair. “Speaking each other’s love language like that.”
“Perfect couple,” Elias agrees, and you smile back at him.
Somehow, you and Elias managed to create a language of your own: one that you could speak with nobody else. But luckily, you don’t have to.
Cause he came home to your shared apartment like he always does, and well. That’s the biggest act of service he could do for you.  
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1plus1kiyoomi · 4 years
Text
Chapter 19: Baby Brother
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[masterlist] [kia’s slambook]
warnings: implied suicide attempts, please read at your own risk
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“I’m Sakusa Kia. My mama is (L/N) (F/N) and my papa is Sakusa Kiyoomi,” Kia proudly says, looks back to smile at her father. He pats her head in approval.
“Do you wanna answer questions, baby?” Kiyoomi asks her and she nods. He nods at the interviewers and they quickly scribble questions for Kia on their notepads. “She’ll only answer three questions.”
“No! Five!” Kia corrects her dad, but her hand is raising only two fingers. Atsumu coos at her and she blushes.
“Amongst your papa’s teammates, who is your favorite uncle?” An interviewer asks and Kia falls into deep concentration. Atsumu has a smug look on his face, confident that she’ll choose him. After a while, Kia answers.
“Yoyo and Koko.” The two boys cheer from her answer, leaving Atsumu in despair.
“I thought I was your favorite!” Atsumu whines, looking at Kia with puppy eyes. Kiyoomi gags at his actions, earning a glare from his daughter.
“Mu-chan’s my boyfriend!” Kia claims, making Atsumu smile.
“You heard that everyone. I’m not available anymore,” Atsumu declares with a giggle.
“She’s breaking up with you tomorrow for your twin brother,” Kiyoomi mutters, but the mic picks it up so the whole room hears. Everyone laughs, a pout forming in Atsumu’s lips.
“Next question!” Kia excitedly speaks to the mic.
“Who do you love more? Mama or Papa?”
“Next question!” Kia repeats, ignoring the question.
“You have to answer the question,” Kiyoomi tells her. She shakes her head, the whole room laughing at how she handled the hard question. “I’ll take you to the theme park if you answer.”
“Are you bribing your child?” Atsumu asks. Kiyoomi rolls his eyes at him, not minding his words.
“Really?” Kia’s eyes lighten up. “Then, I’ll answer.”
“Who do you love more? Mama or papa?” Kiyoomi repeats the question in anticipation.
“I love you both the most,” Kia answers, earning everyone’s awws. Kiyoomi kisses the top of her head, his mask hiding his smile.
“Kia has to announce something!” Kia suddenly says in the mic, making you and Kiyoomi nervous.
“Tell me first before you say it,” Kiyoomi tries to take her away from the mic, but she’s already on the table, the mic in her hand.
“Kia is gonna be a big sister! I’m gonna have a baby brother!”
The interviewers clap, congratulating Kiyoomi. They boys on stage exchange looks of confusion, waiting confirmation from their teammate. He forms a cross with his hands, signaling that it isn’t true. Kiyoomi glances at you, who is standing at the sides, hidden from the press. He sees you hide, so he gets worried.
The post-game press conference ends, Kia and Kiyoomi getting off the stage together. He looks for you backstage, but doesn’t find you. He calls you, but you don’t answer. Finally, you answer.
“I’m the parking lot waiting for you,” you answer even before he can ask. You end the call, not wanting anymore questions. He goes to the said place and sees you standing by his car.
“Are you okay?” Kiyoomi asks you, Kia sleeping in his arms. You nod, smiling at him. He tucks Kia in her seat, reclining it so she can sleep comfortably. The two of you enter the car, pretending not to notice the tension in the air.
The three of you head home, the silence you’re making, defeaning. He and Kia takes a shower, while you make dinner. After their bath, they settle in the dining table, waiting for your food. The elephant in the room is probably staring at the two of you.
After dinner, Kia sleeps immediately since she wasn’t able to sleep. You tuck her into the bed in her room, wanting to talk with Kiyoomi alone. You head to his room, lying down beside him. Not able to let the words out of your chest, you pretend to sleep instead.
“Talk to me,” he pouts like a child, the light from outside making his face visible to you. You then lean on the headboard, turning the lamp on. He mirrors your actions and waits for you to speak up.
“Kiyoomi, is there anything you want to tell me?” You finally ask him. He sighs nervously.
“Do you want another child?”
His questions brought waves of memories. And you let those memories wash over you.
You were on your knees, lowering your head. Tears were dropping on the wooden floor as you were not able to look up. Your mother was furious when you showed up to her house pregnant.
“Are you sure want to keep the child?” Your mother asked you. “How about your studies? Your future?” She exclaimed. “What did Sakusa say about this? He should marry you because you’re carrying his child.”
“I broke up with. I don’t want my child to grow up thinking he or she is the reason for an unhappy marriage. Like me,” you replied to your mother bravely. You felt a slap land on your tear stained cheek, leaving a pink mark there.
Even after all that, she still let you stay in her house. You didn’t know why. A couple of times she suggested you to abort the child you were carrying, but you didn’t want to. You were determined to keep the child, your child. The only piece of Sakusa Kiyoomi you had left.
You finally gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl your eyes have ever laid. She was an angel to your eyes and she still is. Sakusa Kia.
Your delivery was normal. Keiji and Kenma were there with you. They stayed with you until you were discharged. Akaashi’s parents were the ones who paid for your hospital bills while Kenma bought the basic needs for you and Kia.
Your mother made you study while you were pregnant. Even just a week after your birth, she forced you to go to school. You obeyed her requests, thankful that still gave you roof above yours and Kia’s heads. She was being generous to you, or that’s what you thought.
She was stealing from you and lying to you. You didn’t know Kenma and the Akaashis were sending you money for Kia’s needs as well as Kia’s. She was using your money to buy her own wants. You weren’t aware that when you were in school, she wouldn’t feed Kia or change her diapers. She left Kia to cry the whole day to the point your child passed out. And she had the guts to tell you to put Kia up for adoption since she was a nuisance to you. That was the last straw.
You told your aunt and Kenma about your mother’s doing. The next day, a case was filed against her. She kicked you out because of that. You’ve never been in contact with her since then.
You lied to Kenma and Keiji, so they would stop sending you money. You didn’t want to be a nuisance to them. You told them you found a job and that you could handle things on your own.
But you couldn’t. You could only afford living in a small room. You had to wash in public baths. The only thing you could feed Kia was your breast milk, and you weren’t even sure if it was healthy or enough. You thought you weren’t a good mother. You thought you were only putting Kia’s life at risk.
You shut your doors closed. You didn’t allow anyone in. You fought your monsters alone and you lost to them. They ate you up. You fell deep into the darkness. You gave up. You lost hope. You did something you should not have.
That night, all you could hear was Kia. It was as if she was comforting you. She didn’t leave your side the whole night. You could feel her holding onto you. She pulled you out of that darkness.
Luckily, Keiji and Kenma able to find you in time. Your uncle and aunt sent you to a place to recover. They’ve always considered you as their child and you’re always grateful towards them for that. Kia stayed with the Akaashis the whole time you were recovering.
After 3 long months, you were finally able to see your daughter again. In the times you weren’t together, you realized you weren’t alone. You slowly opened up the doors, allowing others to enter your life once again. You should have never fought your battles alone. Your best friends were there. Your family was there.
There’s Kia, your reason to live.
“Baby, why are you crying?” Kiyoomi asks, pulling you into his chest. You cry harder, holding onto his shirt tightly. He lets you weep on his chest until your cries turn into sobs. He calms you down by drawing random shapes on your back.
“Kiyoomi, I don’t think I deserve another child,” you confess. He stops his actions then moves down to level his face with yours.
“May I know why?” He questions, tucking strands of hair behind your ear. So you tell him. You tell him what you went through. After listening to your story, you see a tear fall from his eye. “I want to say that I should have reached out sooner because maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t have gone through all of that.”
“Omi, don’t blame yourself please. It wa-” he places a finger on your lips, stopping you from talking.
“All of those happened already and I couldn’t change that. I wasn’t there with you in your darkest times, and maybe it was even my fault that you went through it. I promise you that you don’t have to go through all that alone. You don’t have to sleep on the floor anymore. You will never feel hunger again.”
“Kiyoomi,” you start to cry again, seeing him let go of the tears he has been holding back. The sincerity of his words striking through your heart. You wipe his tears away, caressing his cheek with your thumb.
“It doesn’t have to be now. It can be next year or even in the next 10 years. I just really want to try another for child. I want to experience pregnancy with you. Please, please, please give me the chance to be there from the start,” he says in between cries.
He places his face on the crook of your neck, letting himself cry even harder. Your hair cards into his hair, gently scratching his scalp to calm him down. He wraps his arms around your hips as nuzzles his head on your chest. The silence comforting the two of you. After a few minutes of thinking, you finally speak again.
“What if it’s not a boy?” He pushes himself off of you from your question. He looks at you with hopeful eyes.
“What?” He asks again, making sure you aren’t playing with him.
“You want a son, right? I mean Kia wouldn’t talk about a baby brother if you-” he crashes his lips with yours, stopping you mid-sentence. Your hands find home on the back of his head, fingers tangled with his hair. He pulls away from you, then you see him crying again. “Why are crying again?”
“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” He litters soft kisses all over your face, making you giggle.
“Just make sure you give me a son. Because if we will have more daughters, I’m afraid that will really love you more than me. You’ll spoil them way too much,” you tell him and you see a big smile on his face.
“What if our next child is still a girl?” He cocks an eyebrow at you quite teasingly.
“Then I guess we have to try again until we have a son,” you response with a confident smile.
“You’re driving me crazy. I love you so much.”
You’re finally giving him the chance you never gave him 4 years ago.
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Facts:
Females have two X chromosomes, males have one X and one Y. An egg always carries a single X, while sperms carry either an X or a Y
Girl-boy twins occur when one X egg is fertilized with an X sperm, and a Y sperm fertilizes the other X egg.
Identical twins occur when a single fertilized egg splits into two.
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