#had a good time overall but having to sit without a back support for hours killed me orz

[guromew]

yesterday was the meetup yay :3! this is everything i took there to sell :3)b i'm already planning who else to draw for the next one in a few months ^__^

[alotofpockets]

Mini mate | Katie McCabe

Pairing: Katie McCabe x Reader

Summary: Katie meets your kid for the first time, and they have an instant connection.

A/n: Part of the Mini Mate Universe

Masterlist | Woso masterlist | Words: 2.5k

-----

You were falling for Katie more and more after every date you had been on together. Besides her busy schedule, and your life with a toddler, you have managed to go on quite a few dates over the past two months. When you told her you had a child, and wanted to take things slow, she understood and respected that right away. Overall Katie had been great, and you loved the time you got to spend together.

Today you were out for lunch with your now girlfriend of a week, while your next door neighbour watched your son. Being a single mother, without any support from your family was hard in the beginning, but when Linda from next door had found out you were raising your boy alone, she had offered to watch him as often as she could. She was retired, and loved children. You had found a quick friend in the older woman, and honestly she was a lifesaver. 

You were a couple bites into your lunch when your phone rang, you looked down at the screen and saw your neighbour's name on the screen. “I’m sorry, I have to take this. It could be about Jake.” Katie nods, “Yeah, of course.” You pick up the call, “Hi Linda, is everything okay?” On the other side of the line Linda responds, “Yes dear, little Jakey is doing just fine, don’t you worry. It’s just that I am afraid that I have double booked myself sweetheart, I have to be somewhere in half an hour, and I’m afraid I can’t take him with me.” You relax your shoulders when you realise that your son is alright. “Alright, I will be right there then. Thank you for calling.” Katie had already flagged down a waiter to pack your food as doggy bags. “My neighbour got something mixed up, so I have to go pick up Jake. I’m sorry for having to cut our date short.” She shook her head in response, “Don’t worry about it, darling. The waiter is just bagging up our food, and then I’ll drive you home, okay?” 

On the way home you were thinking how kind, and understanding Katie had been, something you weren’t all that used to. Your heart only warmed at the way she had treated you, which got you thinking. “How would you feel about meeting Jake?” You asked when you were almost back to your place. “I would love to meet him, but only if you’re ready for me to. There is no rush on my end.” Her answer made you smile, she was always making sure you were okay. “Yeah, I am.” 

Katie parks the car, and the two of you walk into your home. After putting away your lunch in the fridge you walk up to Katie. “Do you mind waiting here for a moment, while I pick him up? I want to give him a little heads up that someone else will be at home.” Again Katie was very understanding, and told you it was all good. So, you head next door. “Hi sweetheart.” Linda greets you when she opens the door. “Again, I am so sorry. I hope I didn’t ruin your date with the lovely lady.” You shake your head at the woman, “No need to apologise, I promise. And the lovely lady is actually sitting on the couch, waiting to meet Jake.” Linda brings you in for a hug, “Oh dear, I am so happy for you.” Linda had been a close friend of yours over the years, and had heard all about your growing liking of the woman you had been dating. 

Once Linda lets go of you, you hear little footsteps running your way. “Mommy.” The boy says full of excitement, he keeps running and jumps into your arms. “Hi kiddo, I missed you.” You pepper his cheeks with kisses. A car horn sounds outside, “Sorry honey, I have to leave, can you close up when you leave?” You nod, “Thank you, Linda. Have a good day!” 

You put Jake down, and start walking around to gather his stuff. “Did you have fun with Linda?” He nodded his head excitedly, he had been doing that a lot recently, and you loved his new adorable habit. “I play twains!” You sit him down on the couch, to put his shoes on. “That’s great baby, I’m glad you had fun.” You placed a kiss on his forehead once both his shoes were on. “There is someone waiting at home that I would love for you to meet. Are you ready to go?” He nodded again. “Okay, let's go then.” 

With Jake's hand in yours, you enter your home. Having Katie meet Jake was a big deal, and you were slightly nervous. You really liked Katie, and her and Jake getting along was very important to you. 

Katie was sitting on the couch, and waved to Jake who was shyly hiding behind your leg. “Hi buddy, my name is Katie.” Her kind smile, and soft voice made Jake move out from behind you. “Hi Kawie” Your heart melted at the way he pronounced her name. Jake let go of your hand and walked towards Katie, holding his bunny up to her. “What a cute bunny you have there, buddy. What's your bunny's name?” He hugged the bunny to his chest again, “Benny.” Katie smiled, “Benny the bunny, I like that.” 

The boy yawned, and started rubbing his eyes. “Hey kiddo, it's nap time. Can you pick out a book?” Your home was full of books for the toddler, and you loved giving him the freedom of choosing which story you would read before bed. He came back with a book in one hand and his bunny in the other, and walked straight up to Katie. “This one pwease.” Your fears of the two not getting along instantly fade away, when you see him reach up his arms for Katie to pick him up. She sat him on his lap and started reading the book to him, pointing at all the animals the book talked about. You snapped a quick picture, while watching the heartwarming scene in front of you.

When you came back downstairs after putting Jake down, Katie had plated your packed lunches from the restaurant, and had set the table. “You are amazing,” You say when her eyes meet yours. “and you were so great with him.” A tear escaped your, and you quickly wiped it away, but Katie had noticed. “Come here, darling.” She brings you in for a hug, and rubs her hand over your back soothingly. “I'm sorry, I've just been so worried about the two of you not getting along, and seeing him just walk up to you with his book, that meant so much.” She smiles and moves you so she can look at you. “Don't you ever apologise for that. You are a great mom, and I am so grateful that you wanted me to meet him.”

While Jake was down for his nap, you and Katie settled on the couch, cuddled up together while watching some TV. That was until you heard Jake start talking over the babyphone, letting you know that he woke up from his nap. You place a kiss on Katie’s lips before you get up. “I'll be right back.” 

“Kawieee” Your son runs to her the moment he notices that she is still there. She picks him up and twirls him around, “Hi my mini mate, did you have a good nap?” He does his excited nodding, as a response, and giggles when Katie tickles his belly. 

“Mini mate?” You ask once she has put him in his highchair for his post nap snack. “Yeah I call all my friend's mate, so he's my mini mate.” You laugh, “It's cute. I like it.”

Katie came over more often after that, the bond between the two of them only started to grow, and you couldn't help but fall in love with Katie over the next few weeks. Katie would be staying the night for the first time, you had stayed the night at her place before, but never at your place with Jake at home too. Jake was actually over the moon that Katie would be able to read his nighttime story, and help tuck him in. 

Once you got back downstairs you plopped down on the couch. Katie had gotten Jake a small Arsenal ball, and the three of you had been kicking it around in the backyard for a good part of the afternoon, so you were pretty tired. “You know how I was so worried for the two of you not to get along?” Katie moves her fingers through your hair and hums. “Well, I couldn't have been more wrong. He really loves you, you know?” She nods, noticing that you weren't done with what you were wanting to say. “I do too. Love you, I mean.” You were getting nervous, and messing up what you wanted to say, so you started again. “I love you Katie.” She smiles and moves her hand to your cheek. “I love you too y/n.” She pulls you in closer and kisses you. The kiss was soft, but at the same time it was filled with passion. 

A few weeks later you found yourself in the stands at Meadow Park along with Jake and Linda, cheering on Katie for the first time. Before the match started Katie had found you in the crowd and waved in your direction. Jake started excitedly waving back once you pointed her out.

You had watched Katie play on TV a couple of times since you had started dating, but never before had you experienced the game in such an environment. The crowd cheered and sang chants the whole time, it was truly amazing how much support the team got.

Arsenal won the match, and after she finished signing jerseys and posters, and taking pictures with fans, she made her way over to you. “You played so well. Good job captaining the team!” She brought you into a hug. “Thank you baby.” She hugged Jake next, and lastly she greeted Linda with a hug as well. “Kawie.” Jake said, making grabby hands towards her. She takes him from where you were holding him on the railing, “Did you and Benny like the football match?” Jake hugs Benny tight to his chest, “Yesss.” He adorably drags out the ‘s’. 

“Katie!” Is being called from behind her, “Katie, can you come here for a moment?” Katie sends her teammate a thumbs up, letting her know that she would be right there. “Duty calls.” She tries to hand Jake back to you, but he holds on tight. “Mini mate, I have to go for a bit, but I promise I will be right back.” She tries again, but to no avail. “Me with Kawie.” Katie looks up to you, “Do you mind if I take him with me on the pitch?” You shake your head, “Go for it. Jakey, listen very well to Katie, okay?’ You ruffle his hair before you let them go, and start your conversation with Linda back up. “You found a good one, honey, I can see how much she loves the both of you just from her eyes.” You blush at her words, she had always been very truthful with her words, even when they weren’t what you wanted to hear, so hearing her say that meant a lot. 

The team was waiting for Katie to do their post match team huddle to recap on the match through the eyes of Jonas. Once Katie joined, Jonas started talking right away, so no one had time to question Katie joining the huddle with a kid on her hip. At the end of the speech, Katie was the one to announce, “Team on three.” After which everyone put their hands in the middle, Jake wanted to join and put his hand on top of the rest of the girls. “Team!” The group said before moving out again. Though, some of the girls stick around. Katie was tickling Jake’s belly, pulling loud giggles from the toddler's mouth. “Who is this little guy?” Viv asked, tickling the boy’s belly as well. “This is my mini mate. Can you tell Viv your name, buddy?” The boy was loving all the attention. “Jake.” Katie smiles and holds her hand up to give him a high five, “Good job, buddy.” She then moves her focus back to her teammates surrounding her, “He’s my girlfriend's kid.” This piqued the interest of her teammates even more. “Your girlfriend is here?” Beth asked, and Vic quickly followed with, “Can we meet her?”

You watched from the stands as Katie was twirling Jake around, and walking back towards you with a few of her teammates. “Hi darling, they wanted to come meet you. This is Viv, Beth, and Vic.” She introduced them one by one. “It’s very nice to meet you, and good game by the way.” Katie sets Jake down on the ground, and starts softly kicking a ball to him, like you had done together in the backyard. He was loving all the attention he was getting from the girls, while you were getting to know Katie’s teammates. 

Katie had often talked about her teammates being like family, and the way they were interacting with your son, made you see that right away. You looked at the group of girls playing with him, and the big smile on his face, and in that moment you realised that your little family was going to be expanding over the next couple of months, in the form of lots of aunties. 

Jake was happily running around with Beth and Viv, a few steps away from you, when Katie joined you, both keeping an eye on the little boy. “What are you thinking, darling?” She says while wrapping her arm around your shoulder. “Just that I love you, and seeing him happy means the world to me.” You both smile at the giggling toddler. “I love you too. Beth and Viv asked if the three of us would like to join them for dinner tonight.” Katie turns to Linda, “You were invited too, of course, I just know you already have plans tonight.” Linda waves her off, “Don’t worry about me, honey, you kids have fun.” 

Katie kisses you before she heads down to the locker rooms, “I’ll see at the car.” You walk out of the stadium with Jake on your hip and Linda by your side. “Did you have fun, little Jakey?” Linda asks. His excited nods once again making an appearance. “Kawie and Beffy and Vivi play ball.” His pronunciation of their names brings a smile to your face. “Guess what kiddo, we’re going to see them later too.” His eyes widen before he hugs his body closer to yours, which you took as a sign that he was excited for it too.

-----

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[blippymilk]

Clay Headcannons (Romantic)

Genre: Fluff, Romantic

Warnings: None

A/N: I love Clay so much so I genuinely enjoyed writing this 🤗

✩ The best boyfriend you could ever ask for hands down

✩There’s quite litteraly no one like Clay

✩ You fell first but he definitely fell harder

✩ Words of affirmation + physical touch kinda guy

✩ In the beginning of your relationship he’s not very touchy especially not in public

✩ But once he gets attached it’s over 🫡

✩ Always has to be touching you in some way

✩ Hand holding, waist hugs, neck kisses, and anything else you can think of

✩ Even when he’s working in his office he doesn’t mind you sitting on his lap as he works

✩ You had to be the one who could convince this man that it’s ok to be serious AND fun sometimes

“But what if people think I’m too silly again? My fun boy Clay days are over.” :((

“But there’s also nothing wrong with having fun from time to time too sweetie.”

✩ Wasn’t very open to expressing his emotions before he met you

✩ You had to let him know that it was ok to rant to you (and he’s still adjusting but he’s way better at it now)

✩ Please join his sad book club ok >:((

✩ Best dancing partner. EVER.

✩ If you’re at a party with Clay and there’s a dance floor

✩ Everybody getting left in the dust. Including you after a period of time 😭

✩ This man has past experiences with his boy band so he never lost his moves. If you can push him out of his comfort zone for the night, he’s gonna end up the center of attention.

✩ Clay’s not no mean troll, but he will got to war for his s/o and that’s a fact

✩ He can be very extra without realizing it, especially with the little details (bcs that’s just who Clay is :D)

✩ Don’t let him catch you singing any of his Brozone songs (especially his part). He will be all over you for the rest of the day, teasing you and kissing every inch of your face until no area goes untouched

✩ Wanna get Clay flustered? Tell him he has a beautiful voice and you love to hear him sing

✩ Will 100% start humming to you before bed

✩ You’re the reason Clay started to let up and not focus on working 24/7, 24 hours a week. And Viva noticed that (and she thanked you for helping him relax bcs she’s tired of seeing him stress)

✩ But also please thank him for working so hard to become a licensed CPA. He loves the sound of his job and loves to hear you say it too.

✩ Definitely the big spoon when it’s time to get comfy at night. Being so much taller than you, he likes to consider himself “the one in control”

✩ Loves when you play in and take care of his hair like your own.

✩ Loves a good relaxing “spa” (self care) day. A day where you two, and ONLY you two get to sit back and treat yourselves. Facials, hair care, bubble bath, back massages, etc.

✩ Viva made you a matching sweater romper and you put it on for Clay. Let’s just say that was the best decision ever.

✩ Just like you do for him, he appreciates everything you do. Like no matter what it is, he supports you and he’ll be there every step of the way.

✩ You never have to worry a day in your life about Clay cheating, or finding “someone better”

✩ One time during whatever the situation was that had you guys dancing, you spun away from Clay and a new girl quickly replaced you for him to dip her. And he let her go as soon as she even slightly tilted.

“Clay, why did you drop her?!”

“She was kinda close to me and I don’t know how you or I feel about that to be honest.”

✩ (dw he apologized after)

✩ Clay can be really serious. Or really, really, really, reallyyy, corny. 😐

“Babe, did you know my favorite word is universe? Because it starts with U-N-I.”

“Are you wifi? Because I’m tryna hook up.”

“I heard kissing is a love language. Tryna start a conversation?”

“Are you my grades as a kid? Cause your bad AF.”

“Oh my gosh- CLAY-!”

✩ Overall Clay is an amazingly sweet well rounded man

✩ Never lose him

[nomoreusername]

How Maze Runner Character Would Help If They Found Out You're Bipolar

(I am not trying to stereotype bipolar at all. I have it so when I use terms like mania and episodes I am basing it off of what I know. I know it's a spectrum and different for everyone, but I'm still trying to generalize it as best as I can without being disrespectful)

Doesn't know a lot about it at first so he's a little lost

Secretly looks up stuff about it so he knows and can help better

Catches on to the signs and what helps you very quickly

Never tells anybody and reminds you that you don't owe anyone an explanation for something you can't even control

Will sit in comfortable silence and hold your hand when he can tell things are getting rough

Will journal with you so that you feel connected with him but not pressured to talk

Suggests speaking to him through writing when you physically can't talk

Is very patient when you do

Would drop everything the second you needed him

Basically, he doesn't care whether you need silence or a thousand words as long as you're safe and comfortable

Notices the red flags due to his past experience

Very gently coaxes what's wrong out of you

Opens up back so you know you aren't alone in your mental health

Makes you a list of reasons to live and gives it to you for the next time your low comes

Would have an alarm for when you need to take your medication

Would drive you to and from any psychiatrist and therapists appointment

Doesn't mind when he needs to remind you to eat, sleep, or so basic things when you're going manic

Lets you know when he's worried about you without talking down to or babying you

Would help you schedule a doctor's appointment when your crash or mania is worse than usual or goes on for too long

Would be on the lookout for side effects from any new medications or treatments so he can let you know to bring them up at your appointment

All in all, your most caring and loving supporter

Can tell when you're upset about having it and will try to make jokes to cheer you up

If it doesn't work he'll sit with you in silence and hold you

Would never, ever, ever let anyone talk bad about the mental illness, even if you aren't there

Would sometimes give you too tough love (telling you that you're crashing or having an episode when you're in denial)

When he can tell that it hurt your feelings and just made you defensive he would stop and give you a minute to cool down

After that he would calmly explain why he believes that and would help with whatever you needed if he was right or if something else was going on

Could sometimes be too much when getting you out of the house and doing stuff that's good for you when you're crashing but would realize before it does any harm

Would apologize about it and spend the day laying with and comforting you

To sum it up, his love and concern can be pushy but he will always be there for whatever you need

Would have a little bit of trouble understanding at first

When you had an episode for the first time he made an internal comparison to him lashing out when angry to help with that

Would be good at knowing when you can be calmed down, when you need to be with someone, and when you need to be alone

Would be your first and most intense defender if someone starts stereotyping, being rude, or assuming things about you because of it

Sometimes he would have to catch himself when he's about to lose patience when you're having mania but gets better at it

Knows when it's better for both of you and still safe for you to separate for a little bit (around an hour or two) before helping you work through whatever it was

Would be extremely proud of you when it's very under control and would let you know but also assure you he's aware it's a cycle

Overall, the longer he's with you the better he gets at supporting you

Would sometimes struggle with not taking what you say during episodes to heart but would still understand that you didn't mean and were working on it

Would stay awake and try to soothe you to sleep when your mania causes you to stay up

If you're up for really late he would drive you around and either let you have silence until you fall asleep or talk with you to keep your mind off of it

Would be good at remembering triggers to episodes and help you avoid them

Better at helping you with crashes than mania but isn't in any way bad at either of them

Sometimes would pull away from everyone when he could tell you just needed someone to help you

Sometimes would take your mind off of it and others he would let you talk about it or would hold you when you cried

Generally, very patient and loving while giving you any reassurance you need

Has a basic understanding at first

Researches things about it and keeps what she finds in a journal

Learns and memorizes all the terms and symptoms

Keeps track of patterns she sees with mania and crashes

Has comfort food, movies, and things you'll need near her when she can tell you're going to have an episode

Will watch whatever you want with you while cuddling you until you fall asleep

Gets worried when it happens but doesn't let that blind how you're actually doing

Will eat with with you to make sure you actually are

Tells you she loves you as much as she can so you know you'll never be alone through it

To cut it short, she'll learn everything she can so that she can be everything you need

Listens to what you tell her about it and remembers every last bit of information

Would ask how it went after every psychiatrist/therapists appointment but not pry for details

Knows that even though you need a little extra help from medication or people, you're capable of looking out for yourself

Will bring you your favorite fast food every time she finds out you're not eating because of it

Sits at the table and stares at you while eating her own meal until you finish

Gets you some kind of dessert if you want it when you eat what you can

Will lay on top of you so you can't get up and walk around at night when you aren't sleeping

Sometimes tricks you into thinking her telling you to look out for yourself was actually your idea so you listen

To sum it up, she'll let you be a person while also doing what she has to to make sure you're treating yourself right

Realizes something's wrong during a crash because it reminds her of when Newt was depressed

Tells you she's worried and gets you to open up

Feels a little bad when you do since she didn't expect that answer

When she gets over it she asks if you want to tell her more about it

Listens to every single word

Tells you she loves you and how important you are what when you're finished

Generally better at helping with mania since depression brings back some memories

Will stay up late and read to you when you're manic until you go to sleep

Tells you when you're making a rash decision and suggests you sit down with her and really think it though

Will start adding a "make sure to take your medicine," into her goodmorning/goodnight texts

Notices every change in your behavior and will reassure you she'll be there if you have an episode

Essentially, she makes sure you're being logical when manic and safe when crashing

Asks what she can do to support you when you actually tell her

Makes sure to always know your answer

Would pick up your medicine for you when she sees you're running low

Reminds you when you have to make another psychiatrist or therapist appointment

Has the appointments on her own schedule so she can be ready to drive you to or from there if it ends up being a rough session

Takes you to a quiet place outside if it was to get your mind off of it

Will drive you to her place after that so you still aren't alone

Talks about things that aren't actually important but make you happy until you fall asleep in her arms

Will ask if you want to talk about it in the morning after making breakfast

Respects whatever answer you give her

Overall, she'll make sure you speak for yourself while supporting you when you can't find your voice

[fanfoolishness]

When You Wake

Written for the @summer-of-bad-batch prompts "Hold still" and "Don't avoid the question."

Hunter wonders what he will tell Omega after she wakes up from her injuries. Set during Plan 99. Angst, grief, overall sads. ~1895 words.

---

“Please, CT-9901. Hold still,” AZI said. Hunter knew the medical droid’s voice was meant to be soothing, but the words were like shattered transparisteel, tearing at his ears.

Hunter took a deep breath. Tried to listen to the droid. But his eyes kept darting to where Omega lay huddled limply on the bed, still unconscious. Wrecker sat at her bedside, trying to remain strong for her. But the brace around his neck, the slump of his shoulders, the raggedness of the rise and fall of his chest all showed he was barely doing better than she was. 

“Why won’t she wake up?” Hunter asked in a hoarse voice as the droid continued placing a sturdy wrap around his chest.

“She will,” AZI said. “You must give her time. She experienced a concussion and pulmonary contusions. She will recover, but even with my care recovery is not instantaneous. All of your injuries are serious, and will take time to mend.”

Hunter bit his lip as the droid finished wrapping his chest. Between the extra support and the medication the droid had already given him, the pain was finally receding. 

The physical pain, anyway.

Don’t think about him. Don’t think about the fall. Don’t --

“Am I good?” Hunter muttered.

“Yes, CT-9901. You will make a full recovery with appropriate rest. Would you like me to stay in here and continue monitoring Omega, or --”

“Go. Please.”

Hunter exhaled heavily. The droid had saved them; Hunter didn’t know what would have happened to Omega or Wrecker without AZI’s work, but Hunter couldn’t stand looking at him and his cheerful demeanor a moment longer. 

“I will be waiting in the bar, should anything in her condition change.” The droid hovered out of sight, his servos buzzing and grating. Everything felt too loud right now, too sharp, too much.

Hunter stiffly got to his feet, resting a hand briefly on Wrecker’s back for support. Together they looked down at Omega, neither of them able to speak.

Hunter shuddered, remembering the sight and smell of her little cap, soaked through with blood. Luckily AZI had been able to stitch the wound in her scalp and clean her hair, though Hunter could still pick up a faint whiff of dried blood in the thick, close air of the back room. 

How could she look so calm right now, like nothing had happened?

When everything had happened?

Wrecker painstakingly stood up, face twisting with effort. “Here. You -- you should sit with her. I’ll go.”

Hunter looked into his brother’s face, seeing puffy, reddened eyes. “But what do I say to her? When she wakes up?”

Wrecker shook his head, tears threatening again. “I don’t know. I can’t -- don’t -- don’t make me.” He grimaced, looking past Hunter as if seeing something far away. “She won’t wanna see me. I could’ve stopped him, Hunter -- I could’ve saved --”

Wrecker, get him up here!

Hunter reached out a trembling hand. Laid it on Wrecker’s shoulder. Shook his head. “No you couldn’t,” he said, voice dull and empty. “And neither could I.”

---

They’d talked about it once, days before their first mission.

Tech glowed. He scribbled his thoughts on the walls, plans a dozen times over, a manic burst of ideas. There were plans where Hunter infiltrated, where Wrecker smashed or exploded, where Tech used the Seppies’ own droids against them, where Crosshair set off a chain reaction with his mirrors. They strategized long into the night, nearly giddy with making up more plans: some of them insane, some of them just good clean fun blowing up clankers. 

Until Crosshair swiped Tech’s datapad five hours past lights out, scrolling down idly and then looking puzzled. “You haven’t gone over this one. What’s Plan 99? There’s no details, nothing else, just the number.” 

Tech grabbed it back. “Ah. It’s -- it’s nothing.”

“Tech, it’s always something with you,” said Hunter. 

“Yeah. Don’t avoid the question,” Wrecker said, yawning. “Unless Plan 99’s going to bed an’ getting some shut-eye. These plans are fun, Tech, but I’m never gonna remember ‘em all.”

Tech frowned. “Very well. You recall 99, our fellow defective clone.”

“Old 99,” Wrecker said, his eyes going soft. “He was a hero.”

“He showed those regs a thing or two,” Crosshair said, nodding respectfully. “But what’s he got to do with our plans? He’s been gone a long time.”

Hunter sighed. “I think I know what it means.” He gave Tech a long look. “Self-sacrifice, is it?”

Tech nodded. “We are soldiers and clones. Statistically speaking, it is highly unlikely that we will die of old age. I had thought that discussing it now might bring down the mood, so to speak, so I had not mentioned it before.” He looked around at them, the smiles from a few minutes ago all faded. “I see I was correct.”

“You all can be emotional about it if you want,” Crosshair scoffed. “But I wouldn’t miss any of you.”

“Bantha shit,” Wrecker said, punching Crosshair in the shoulder. Crosshair winced, rubbing his shoulder hard and scowling. “You’d miss me the most, and you know it!”

“That is irrelevant, if the mission requires it,” Tech said. “As it well may, in service of the greater good.”

“Look, Tech, don’t tell me the odds,” Hunter said. “Let’s just do our best to get through the war. This squad is something special. The regs might call it being defective, but I call it being better. That’s how we’re gonna get through this war -- being better together. So that means Plan 99 should only be the ultimate last resort. Understood?”

“Understood,” Wrecker and Crosshair said.

“Of course,” Tech agreed, blinking and adjusting his goggles. “I have no desire to implement Plan 99. It is only that it is a possibility that must be considered.”

---

A possibility.

An eventuality.

Hunter sat in the chair, his skin crawling, his mind blank hissing static.

Omega still lay unconscious, her heartbeat pulsing faintly, a soft rhythm he could sense beneath her gentle exhalations. The rhythm was slightly off from what he had attuned himself to on countless nights on the Marauder, its pattern disturbed by injury. But AZI had said she would be waking up, and soon.

What could Hunter possibly say to her?

He sat there, desperately hoping she would wake up and be all right, desperately hoping she would stay asleep. If she kept sleeping, he wouldn’t have to see her face when she woke up and realized Tech was gone.

She breathed in. Breathed out. He reached out, gently brushing a lock of hair back from her cheek. His hand froze, and he pulled it back.

He closed his eyes, but then there was Tech’s voice in his mind, resolute, determined, resigned. When have we ever followed orders? 

He couldn’t dwell on that. Couldn’t listen to it again. He reached out, opening his senses, desperately seeking distraction. Anything to keep the memory from playing back again and again. His leg twitched, jittering up and down as he opened his senses as fully as he could.

The room air pressed in on him, warm and stuffy and suffocating. A bead of sweat dripped down his cheek, having slipped past his bandanna. The whine of Cid’s neon lights in the next room buzzed and prickled in his ears. He took a deep breath of the warm air, pulling in the smell of stale alcohol, crumbs of Mantell mix ground into the floorboards, hints of blood and sweat and body odor of a dozen different species. 

The floor in the hallway creaked, the sound consistent with someone stopping at the door and looking inside the room. Hunter didn’t bother turning around to see who it was. He knew it was Cid, between the pattern of the footfalls, the pitch of the creaking, the metallic scents of Trandoshan pheromones. His nose twitched, picking up a difference in Cid’s scent. Something was off with her pheromones, but he didn’t know enough about her species to guess what it meant. Maybe it was worry for the kid. Maybe it was regret. Maybe she was just hungry. 

He didn’t know, didn’t care. The slow heavy footsteps started up again, kept going down the hall.

His hand slid to his gauntlet, unsheathing his blade. Twirling the blade had become a habit long ago, as unconscious and automatic as Crosshair chewing his toothpicks or Tech scrolling his datapad. He hesitated, the blade’s weight and heft wholly familiar in his hand, and yet something seemed off. 

He twirled it lazily. No, nothing was wrong with the knife. He picked up the rhythm, blade spinning dangerously between his fingers -- 

Kriff. The blade clattered to the floor, narrowly avoiding slicing through his glove. It rattled him, looking down at it laying between his feet. 

Nothing was wrong with the blade. It was wrong with him.

Hunter picked up the blade, shoving it roughly back into his gauntlet. What was he doing? Stupid distractions when he should be thinking about Omega. About what he could possibly say to her.

I’m sorry, kid. We couldn’t save him. Nobody could. (But what if Wrecker had been able to get him up in time? What if we’d been faster getting out? What if we’d waited for backup?)

I’m sorry, Omega. Tech knew it was the only way.  (Did he? He was a genius. He should have figured something else out! How could he have fucked up like this? How could he leave us like this?)

I’m sorry I failed him. And you. And Crosshair. (Crosshair should’ve come with us, should’ve left the Empire when he had the chance. Then we would’ve never gone to Eriadu. This is his damn fault, all of it!)

I’m sorry I wasn’t a better leader. I’m so sorry, kid. 

(It’s on me. All of it. All of it.)

The pain roared within him, but it wasn’t the pain of broken ribs and torn muscles. It went deeper than that, dug itself deep into the very heart of him, emptied him out of everything but guilt and loss and disbelief. It took his breath away. He wrapped his arms around his injured chest, fingers digging into his sides, squeezing hard enough that the physical pain broke through again. He threw himself into it, drowned himself in the way his body jangled and ached.

He panted, grimacing. This he could deal with. This he could live with. But the emptiness, the awful truth that Tech was gone -- how was he supposed to live with that? How was he supposed to help Omega through it?

Hunter slumped forward, releasing his grip, taking a deep, jagged breath. His head swam.

He didn’t know how to do it.

He was going to do it anyway.

Hunter swallowed, nodding, and sat up despite the way his body protested. He watched Omega resting, her young face forgetful for just a little while longer.

He’d be there for her, no matter what. His resolve hardened, and he thought of sunny days on Pabu, the sound of waves on the beach, a town of people who did not practice war. He thought of childhood, something none of them had ever known. 

He hadn’t been able to save Crosshair from himself or the Empire.

He hadn’t been able to save Tech.

He’d save Omega if it killed him.

“I’m gonna keep you safe, kid,” Hunter whispered. “I promise.”

[jinhyun]

—coffee fix.

pairing: lee felix x barista!reader

genre: fluff, coffee shop au, non-idol au

word count: 1.7k

summary: felix's new year's resolution is simple, start liking coffee. the problem now is, he doesn't know whether he is genuinely succeeding at it so far, or he just keeps coming back to the coffee shop around the corner because of the cute barista he met there.

a/n: helloo, this little story was comissioned by @babygothchick and i personally thought it was the cutest. thank you so much for your support, i hope you enjoy it<3

comissions are still open!

Felix loved the smell of coffee shops.

He loved the way the smell of baked goods so perfectly mixed with the one of coffee and it overtook his senses as soon as he entered them.

He loved the overall aesthetic of both coffee and cafés, and how cool he thought people looked walking around with their different shades of brown drinks on the streets.

Coffee itself, the taste of it, however, he did not love. Or, well, at least not the taste of it alone.

But he was working on it, and the coffee shop you worked at was beginning to make him change his mind. More specifically, you were beginning to change his mind.

He still remembered the first time he arrived there, a little over two months ago, at this very same time of the day. You were the only one working that winter evening, he guessed since it was hardly two hours before closing time and the place was pretty much isolated by then.

He had walked up to you behind the front desk and instantly smiled as you greeted him with what he found out to be one of the prettiest smiles he had ever seen — one that reached your eyes, which were a dark shade that could only remind him of strong coffee. Whether the connection had been unconscious or not, that was all it took for him to go for it and order an iced Americano.

Not the best of choices, he found out only a matter of minutes later.

It had been quite funny, actually — right after you had stopped visibly panicking, that is.

The disgusted expression on his face that followed the first sip of his drink was quick to give away just how much he hated it, and it did not go unnoticed by you. You freaked out immediately, apologising over and over as you believed you had either given him the wrong order or you had straight up fucked up his coffee. Rush hour had not been that long ago, after all, and you would not be surprised to have made a mistake after all the madness that had been going on earlier that evening.

But he smiled, shyly, ashamed, reassuring you everything was fine and that he actually hated coffee. He just wanted to give it a try, as everyone around him seemed to love it and therefore he had taken it upon himself to make liking coffee his main goal this year.

You had found clear amusement in his rather cute backstory, and, easy as that, that's how your little coffee journey together began.

He would come here every week and try out different drinks you would recommend for him, as you were now just as determined for him to reach his new year's resolution as he was.

He would always come at the same time, when he knew there were little to no people inside. He would always sit on the same seat by the bar, so he could talk to you while you kept on working. If you were busy he would wait for you to be done. If someone else was there to take his order he would just wait for you to come back. For it did not take him long to realise that what he enjoyed the most about coffee was you.

The smile that took over his face the second he saw you behind the front desk and your eyes met his that day, could only reaffirm that realisation.

"Hey, Felix" you greeted politely, walking up to the cash register. "Was wondering whether you were coming back this week".

"Y/N, hey" his smile grew brighter. "Of course I was. Can't live without my coffee fix".

You shook your head in amusement, as you knew well enough by now that he could most definitely live a very happy life without the weekly coffee fixes he had been forcing himself to get.

Looking away from him and at the computer screen instead, you began to enter the order he had been going for the past month — the only one he had managed to like so far. "I'll get working on your iced Mocha right away".

"Actually, um…" he stopped you. "I was thinking I could try something else today?"

"Got tired of Mocha already?" you tilted your head, quickly deleting what you had added to his order.

"Surprisingly, no" he chuckled. "But I thought I could give iced Americano another try".

Your expression right then must've given away how reluctant you were to that idea, because he was quick to explain himself.

"I know it seems like a long shot, but my friends look so cool drinking their Americanos like it's nothing, while I still need lots of sugar and cream not to want to vomit".

You chuckled, selecting the iced americano option on the screen just as he took out his wallet. "You can look just as cool with your iced Mocha, though".

"Not quite" he sulked with a shake of his head, tapping his card on the machine to pay for his coffee. "Besides, I'm finally starting to like coffee, right? I do enjoy iced Mocha after all".

"Mocha and Americano are very different, you know?" you taunted him with the obvious, getting a playful glare from him. "But, I mean, it's your choice after all" you handed him the receipt. "I can still add some extra sugar to it if you want me to".

"Nah, I want the real thing" he nodded determinedly.

Giving him one last smile as you knew right then there was no changing his mind, you grabbed a cup and began to work on his iced drink.

One single look at it after you had placed the plain coffee in front of him, was all it took for you to know he was already questioning his previous decision. Not backing away, however, Felix grabbed the cup and brought it up to his mouth. The sooner he drank it, the sooner it would be over.

It took him one second to try it, and another one to make the exact same disgusted expression he had made the first time he came here.

Instead of panicking this time, you laughed.

"Don't laugh" he pouted.

"I thought you were starting to like coffee?"

Gently sliding the iced Americano away from him, he crossed his arms in defeat. "Seems like I'm not after all".

"It's okay," you chuckled. "If it makes you feel any better, you still look the coolest to me".

"Shut up" he couldn't help but join in your laughter, as he adorably hid his face behind his hands.

"Mocha? Caramel Macchiato?" you offered, taking the Americano away from him as you knew he had no intention to finish it.

"I guess I could give the Caramel Macchiato a chance" he sighed, reaching for the wallet in his pocket so he could pay for his new order.

You were the one to stop him this time, shaking your head no before motioning for him to keep it. "It's in the house".

"But—"

"You didn't even finish your previous drink, I'm not charging you for a new one".

"Isn't there like, a coffee shop policy for that?" he teased.

"Oh, hush," you squinted your eyes at him. "Don't worry about other coffee shops and be thankful for the special treatment you get in this one".

Felix smiled at your words. Special treatment. He didn't know when he had started to want to believe it was like that. That you only treated him like that, differently to all the other usual customers you probably had on the daily.

Was that delusional of him? Not wanting to be just another customer to you?

He wanted to believe it wasn't, and that you genuinely enjoyed his company just as much as he enjoyed yours. It was that hopeful thought what brought him to speak up once you placed the fresh new drink in front of him.

"Speaking of other coffee shops, though…" his voice came out softer than usual, managing to catch your attention. "There's this new one that opened downtown, it seems pretty good for what I've seen. Got very good reviews".

You raised a curious yet daring eyebrow. "What, are you thinking of becoming an usual there now? Are my coffee making skills not good enough for you anymore?"

Felix's head was thrown back as a deep, throaty laugh escaped his mouth, finding genuine amusement in the way you had pressed an offended hand to your chest. "Of course not, your coffee making skills are the best".

You smiled, not letting your sudden shyness show. "So?"

"So… I don't know, I mean… I enjoy your coffee, as much as I can actually enjoy coffee," his words earned a laugh from you. "But… it would be kind of shitty to ask you out to your workplace and have you make our coffees, wouldn't it?"

Your heart skipped a beat. "Ask me out?"

"Mhm…" he nodded, taking a sip of his sweet drink.

You remained quiet, intently watching him as he seemed to be greatly pleased with the sweet mix of caramel and coffee. "You're asking me out?"

"That's what I'm doing".

"Like, on a date?"

Felix laughed under his breath, you looked so cute whilst in denial. "Yes, Y/N. I'm asking you out on a date".

"Why…"

"Because you're very pretty, and my type, and I really like your company and would love to spend some time alone with you without this barista-customer dynamic standing in the way" his words could only make your heartbeat race. "I understand if you don't want t—"

"I'm free on Saturdays" you cut him off, looking down at your hands as you tried your best to compose yourself before you could stare back into his chocolate eyes. "I must warn you I do enjoy my iced Americano and will probably look way cooler than you, though".

"I'll take the risk" Felix chuckled, eyes softening just as yours did. "Saturday it is".

[missinconsistent]

You can tell people who don't watch Niji are really scrambling to find anything to hate about the AR Live because they just don't want any of the livers to celebrate any accomplishments. But if anyone is actually taking the opinions of those who didn't even watch the damn event at face value, here is my take on some of the "issues" these people are complaining about:

Long read.

THE GRADUATED LIVERS:

Pomu's, Nina's, and Mysta's voice were kept because it was a decision by the livers to be included for the fans. The remaining livers re-recorded their live stages after the others graduated, but some people actually think Niji was just showing 1-year-old footage, which would take some insane editing skills. The graduated livers' voices were part of the back track, not as part of the live singing. Their vocals were only heard for debut songs, too. There is also a weird narrative that the voices of the graduated livers should not have been allowed when there is no problem with it. Those graduated livers still support their friends and were more than happy to be included in AR Live even after graduating.

SELEN AND PASTEL STAGE:

It makes sense why Selen had to be cut from AR Live. There would be a lot more heat if they kept her in after her termination than to just roll with it since, unlike the graduated livers, Selen was terminated not long after already recording AR Live back in November last year.

I get it's upsetting many things had to be cut from Pastel Stage, but it's not just getting all the livers to Japan, but also booking the venue, getting the 3D riggers, stage staff, choreographers, and more. They'd have to push the AR Live concert even further after canceling the initial one. It honestly makes sense that they'd cut content rather than spend the resources to re-record it for a THIRD time. And since everyone wants the Niji to take better care of their livers' mental health, then not overworking them on this overdue project is a start.

3D MODELS AND RIGGING:

Apparently, someone paid the money to hate-watch AR Live so they could spread screenshots to make it look bad, despite the strict copyright rule not to share screenshots (which of course would lead to a DMCA). Frankly, if anyone is going to judge the quality of the whole 3-hour concert based on snippets and not actually bother to watch it, then they can't make the conclusion that the 3D models were bad. Although it's weird that someone did pay to sit through a 3-hour concert without having any intention of enjoying it to begin with.

I watched the concert, and the 3D models looked good, in my opinion. Nijisanji is known to have better 3D rigging compared to their competitors. The team that did the models and rigging did a perfectly fine job and it's pretty insulting to put it down because you chose to look at it under a microscope and pinpoint any instance where it might have looked off. A lot of the choreography (especially Shu's Shanti 🪑) and the variety games show how good the rigging can look, and it seems unfair to not look at those examples alongside the bad ones.

CONCLUSION

I feel like the Niji hate at this point is getting ridiculous. There's plenty of real reasons to not like Niji. If you want to "SiNk tHe yAtCht" so bad, you can boycott it and not spend money to hate-watch their concert, lol. Drama channels finding anything to talk about AR Live when they haven't even watched it is just another example of how little integrity they have to report hearsay. And it's tiring to always hear people looking at any possible negative thing to say when the livers and their fans are just being happy..?

Don't get me wrong, I have my criticisms of the company. I've aired it out before. Especially after Selen's termination. Hell, it's not like I don't have my own critique of AR Live. I also wish fans got more Pastel Stage. I also wish the first AR Live wasn't canceled. But by no means do I think the AR Live we got was bad.

I left the concert feeling elated and overall had way more positive thoughts about it than any negative ones. And it has me looking forward to future AR Live concerts. Other 3D debuts. And other projects like NijiEncounter.

Anyways, Niji antis can and will keep obsessively bitching about Niji, and then say "cope and seethe" when someone tells them to take a chill pill. But Niji AR Live did really well. The fans are proud of the livers' hard work to make it happen. There will be more positive things to come for Niji enjoyers. But if antis want to keep writing their own fan fiction that tells them otherwise, there's no point in changing their mind, lol.

For fans that want to keep supporting their livers, or any sane person that wants to see Niji better themselves, please don't let the hate keep you from celebrating any wins, big or small, that the livers are accomplishing.

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

The great regular sleep experiment 2024 part "haunted"

So, I slept from 10:30 ish am to 2 ish pm... I laid there a while trying to sleep more before giving up and checking the clock and seeing 2:45, The length of time I was laying there felt like an hour or two, so I am assuming I slept till 2, probably, but hat might be generous.

In general I seem cursed to sleeping 6 hours per day or less.

The other really annoying thing is that the last time I was this sleep deprived and this stuck on a firm schedule, I was in my early 20's, working at a call center and living with the guy I refer to as my ex husband.

... Which means I keep having dreams that we're reconnecting and having conversations about maybe getting back together and I DO NOT care for it.

That was the one relationship I had were I was never harassed for sex when I didn't want it, and didn't have to deal with little tantrums or displays when I didn't feel like being affectionate or visiting, and don't get me wrong, he's -overall- genuinely a sweet guy.

But I always got the distinct sense that he didn't even like me as a person, and was just there so I would support him and he could avoid his abusive grandmother and uncle. I tried to talk to him about things and take him at his word, but he always seemed so depressed and shut down in a way that read as guilt or shame to me. He never seemed to enjoy talking to me, or spending time with me, and he certainly didn't want sex, at least with me, even by my standards which is to occasionally entertain it as a thing you can do with someone that feels good if you're both in the mood.

I always, once I stopped believing what he was telling me about how he felt, wrote him off as not meaning to take advantage of me, and as feeling really guilty about it, to the point of being paralyzed and kind of stuck, or not even conscious of it... Which is why I broke up with him even when that meant losing my home, which was a one bedroom apartment with 525$ inclusive rent [curses T~T]...

But the thing is, I keep becoming aware in the dreams, stuck as a part of my psyche that has been dormant a long time when I am awake, someone who doesn't remember everything that happened since high school and 'her' early 20s. I keep becoming aware of myself as I am now and starting to ask the uncomfortable questions that come up whenever I look back on everything from my perspective now.

I would have a very hard time -these days- watching someone lie daily about wanting to be in a relationship with me, only to act miserable, avoid me, criticize me constantly, shut down in most conversations with me, act so miserable around me but so happy around everyone else that all our mutual friends assume I must be doing something to upset him, and who just lets his family shit-talk me to my face about being 'lazy' without saying anything to defend the fact that I work 10 hour shifts to support him while he sits at home and plays games all day... I would have a hard time watching that and not seeing it as being done -to some significant degree- on purpose, or at least while consciously aware that's what he was doing. Maybe I'm just a suspicious person now, or maybe it's the experience of people talking.

And I cannot stress enough that I never "nagged" him. I didn't express anything unreasonable like a guilt trip. I was on eggshells trying to be careful how I brought up him video-gaming all day and doing nothing to clean up or pitch in while I worked a full time high stress job. I always put things as gently as possible, tried and failed to set boundaries, made occasional, calm and conversational requests that he at least keep the house clean or learn to cook, or at least go back to high school before he couldn't anymore, if he wasn't going to get a job. If he could tell I was upset and that he was unfairly burdening me when he didn't have to, or that it was destroying my health, those were his own observations and judgements. I was WAY too gentle with him. I felt bad asking him for anything at the time, too much so to try to demand he stand up to unfair accusations about me and actually tell people I was footing all the work/chores and financial burden of two people.

It wasn't until about 3 years in when I seemed ready to kick him out that he went back to school and made local friends.

And that's when I started to see it. I started to understand why our mutual friends thought I was "hen pecking" him or maybe being verbally abusive in private? He'd go back to his old cheery but shy self around other people. He'd bring a friend from school to visit once and they'd be nice to my face but avoid me forevermore. He'd hang out with me and my old girlfriend and even though they both regularly shamed me for things like speaking too loudly in public... They'd get distracted and caught up and start loudly play fighting around the food court in the mall. They were BOTH only afraid of attracting the attention of strangers when they were being seen with me.

If I had my life experiences as of now, back then, and having lived with fine and GB myself [who coincidentally were his two friends from school, even though GB tried to lie to me about it and "bunny" we'll call him, wouldn't dignify my messages with an answer to confirm... and I swear I couldn't have known it was them it was their other two roommates who interviewed me and got me in there]... As of today -if I had to take a shot in the dark- I'd say he was cheating on me with Fine at the time, or at least that part of her bitchy animosity towards me, despite claiming to want to be my friend, has to do with my ex-husband being her type entirely and him not -quite- cheating on me. Or maybe guilt and a sense of obligation to make nice because he did.

If he had've just answered my message and told me honestly what his relationship was like with these two, about 6 years ago, long after he was out of my life and theirs, or that GB was the guy who was a complete bitch to me the whole time out of jealousy over Bunny 'getting to date someone like [me]' [by his own admission, look I'm face-blind okay?]... He could have saved me so much fucking trouble. I would have known I couldn't trust Fine to be honest with me about anything from the start [and that she'd start taking attached men home to fuck all the time], and GB never would have raped me, and I never would have been in the position I was in when the plague hit or when we got evicted.

But any time I had asked ANY of them about what was going on back then, they all just clam up and get avoidant or lie [tic tacs too if she ever knew him, which seems likely because she's been friends with the other two since gradeschool, absolutely would not admit to knowing anything about the situation even while cozy-ing up to me], so I am probably never going to get answers about any of it.

Unless my ex has the decency to fucking answer me and be honest about it all. That's the only way I get closure on just how badly the other three lied to and manipulated me. Or any of them. IG if any of the 4 come forward I have my answers about the other 3.

...So in the dream I do what I would do now, once I become aware as one of my current selves, or a sum of them, I ask him shit like whether he was cheating one me, ect...

And in the dreams he says 'no' but I can tell he's lying, at least in the dreams, I can parse what part of his responses are genuine and which ones are an act to cover some deep shame or guilt. And all in all it seems a little more clear that he was more conscious of what he was doing than I had ever given him credit for. Maybe that's my being cynical now.

But these are just dreams, they are never going to be a reliable account and they are never going to give me real closure.

So in effect, every other night or so I am just wasting about 3 hours of sleep talking to someone I don't even want to be talking to, trying to get answers that will never mean anything. I don't want to be doing that.

I want to be building a consistent dream relationship with someone I LIKE and can TRUST

The other half of the time I dream about being friends with youtubers because their faces and voice are the only ones familiar to me and -at least physiologically- I am desperately lonely. My nervous system knows I need human contact and is trying to invent it for me. Which is leading to the other most socially awkward dreams I could possibly have. I need to feed my brain what Piccolo dbz would look and sound like irl, and not animated, so my brain can attach to him, or my imaginary girlfriend instead. The youtubers thing is very para-social, it's always someone new, so no weird fixations, but I'm not sure it's healthy compared to alternatives... Better than my exs and ex friends though fr.

I have finally regressed through most of my shitty ex's to finally be unpacking the fact that I want to demand fucking answers from my ex husband... Which I ALREADY KNEW... I didn't fucking need my dreams to tell me that! I have messaged him at least twice begging him to just tell me who's lying to me... Which I hope means I'll never dream about the others again. But I still do not care for it and I want it to stop. That was shoved in a box because there's nothing I can reasonable DO about it. The ball is NOT in my court.

Send THEM dreams compelling them to be honest with ME ffs... [please]

Maybe if I reach out to him for answers I could make the dreams go away, but the last time I sent him a message asking for some clarification, he just never answered me.

These people have been haunting my life since my first apartment and I want them excised. I want closure on how full of bullshit they all were so I can improve my ability to read people socially -with feedback- in a way that seems essential to keeping myself safe from ending up in the same shitty situations on repeat... So I can get my unconscious mind to let got of that mystery and let me fucking sleep.

I also want fucking closure from my family and am -also- not getting that. I want closure from my ex girlfriend and I am not getting that.

I only ever wanted honesty so I could make my own informed choices.

So I would rather it not drag up dead versions of me and make me relive these times every night when I am trying to sleep more than 3 hours.

... Also had a dream with a haunted doll, unrelated, that had to do with men showing up in my living space and a woman forcing me to justify why I should keep getting to live there... Can't say I cared for that either... The haunted doll was good though, she was helping me prevent children committing suicide, so... The literal hunted doll was not the problem... Best part of the dreams really, other than being friends with Sabrina and Abigail of youtube [we were discussing their recent unemployment???].

Anyway, my point being, by putting myself back into the same sleep deprived state of my 20's I have ended up slamming part of my brain back into those memories, only instead of getting that part of my psyche back, she's still dead, and now I am haunted by endless social betrayal when I am trying to fuggen sleep.

And I don't know how to fix it.

Because at this point I can't sleep outside the sleep times if I try, no matter how sore and exhausted, and no matter how much I desperately need more than 6 hours.

I could never had predicted this experiment would go this badly. I had though that -at worst- I just wouldn't be able to stay awake to maintain the schedule.

I never should have started this.

I knew this was bad road.

I just didn't know how bad.

If I could sleep an extra 2-4 hours daily and not dream about people who aren't in my life anymore for a fucking reason... This would be fine. Successful even.

The problem is that regular sleep for me is this double edged blade.

I also think I forgot to mention trying to find a phosphorus supplement at walloworld, but they didn't seem to have any and I am still pretty sure coke is cheaper and that one can of coke on most days can't possibly have enough phosphorus in it to overdose.

Unfortunately, the atp theory panning out, in practice [still unconfirmed with blood work or anything but getting results??], for me means only that I am unusually productive for someone this sleep deprived and that is NOT A GOOD THING, I fear, because I keep injuring myself.

It's a lot like being VERY drunk but having so much more energy than I should for someone this sore, uncoordinated, and drunk... Not a great combo. Bad road.

At least my dishes are done and I keep feeding myself?

The cuts bruises, pulled muscles, and missing skin sure hurt a lot though...

[allofasudden00]

Serenades In The Sun

The sun burns down from high above, perfectly centered in the deep blue sky. The ruthless heat of the day is disbursed by the cool wind that glides its way through the surrounding air. The day had started out busy, but as soon as the afternoon crept in, Julieta found herself at her stall alone. The morning had seen several cuts and bruises from the builders, and a few of the children. But overall, there had been fewer injuries today, so Alma had graciously given Julieta the day off.

Without hesitation, Julieta had run as fast as her legs could take her, right to Agustín’s front door. With matched enthusiasm, Agustín was thrilled to join Julieta for her day off. That was an hour ago, and now the couple finds themselves on the bank of the river. Julieta lies on a blanket, under the shade of a tree, while Agustín tosses stones across the water. Julieta stares at the back of his head with a smile, entranced by the tst, tst, tst, sound of the stones skipping off the surface of the water. 

“You’re surprisingly very good at that, amor.” Julieta comments, breaking the silence and causing Agustín to turn around. A massive stupid grin graces his face, making Julieta’s heart skip several beats. He drops the rocks he was holding and dusts off his hands on his pants before making his way to her. 

“Well, it’s all in the wrist.” Agustín says in a matter-of-fact tone. He grabs his sun hat and places it onto his head. He lays down on his side next to her, supporting his head on his hand. “It is quite simple, but thank you for the compliment.” He gives a little chuckle before kissing her forehead. Julieta closes her eyes and savors the kiss with a smile. 

“I’m very glad today hasn’t been busy. It is nice to spend time with you, Agustín.” Julieta says, turning onto her side to look at him. “Sorry, it’s been a while since our last date.” 

“Oh hush, there is nothing to be sorry about, mi vida.” Agustín dismisses her apology with a wave of a hand. “You are a very busy woman, and truth be told, I also have been rather busy, so we are both to blame.” 

“I guess that is true.” Julieta agrees. “But it is nice to spend some time with each other again.” 

“That it is. Spending time with you is my favorite activity.” Agustín states, sitting up and smiling down at her. 

“Oh, really?” Julieta raises a playful eyebrow. “Why is that?” 

“Many reasons,” Agustín nonchalantly comments. He reaches across the blanket and grabs the guitar he had brought. “For one reason, I get to see your beautiful face,” he strums the guitar in a light, slow melody. “Hear that adorable snort you do when you laugh hard enough, see how the sun dances off your skin, get lost in the twinkle in those big eyes of yours.” 

“Oh please, Agustín, you’re such a flatterer.” Julieta giggles, turning her head to hide the massive blush spreading across her cheeks. Agustín hums in response, continuing his strumming. 

“That I am, but all for you, of course.” Agustín admits. “I mean, God has placed an amazing woman in front of me, and you think I shouldn’t list all the amazing and beautiful things about her? That sounds like blasphemy to me, Juli.”  

“You’re dumb,” Julieta laughs, rolling onto her back. A large smug grin spreads across Agustín’s face. 

“Dumb and in love, both of those things come in the same package.” Agustín shrugs. “I can’t help it. And do you know what that makes me want to do?” He asks playfully.

“Do enlighten me.” Julieta smirks, wiggling her eyebrows up at him. 

“Well, it makes me want to sing.” Agustín states, changing the tempo of his strumming. “Ay, mi amor, with skin as soft as silk-” His belting comes to a sudden halt as Julieta smacks the brim of his hat, causing it to tilt over his face. 

“If you want to continue that, you have to get this back!” Julieta laughs maniacally as she rips the guitar out of Agustín’s grasp and takes off running towards Casita. Agustín calls out to her, his tone filled with playful joy. She gets rather far in her efforts before she suddenly feels a tugging force around her waist. 

“Now, where do you think you’re going?” Agustín wraps an arm around her waist as he catches up with her. “I didn’t get to finish my ballad!” Agustín bends down and, with a quick motion, he tosses Julieta over his shoulder. “Now you are stuck listening to it.” He starts walking away with her as he begins to sing again. 

Julieta kicks her legs in fake protest as she giggles wildly while Agustín serenades her on their way back to Casita. The rest of the day passes in grins and playful giggles as the couple spends their time together in Casita’s kitchen. Agustín strums his guitar and sings as Julieta dances around the kitchen, enjoying the attention and the stupid lovey-dovey songs he sings about her. 

It isn’t too often that Julieta gets a day off, but she is definitely very grateful that the residents of the Encanto decided not to injure themselves today. Today will be marked as one of her favorite days, thanks to the silly mustached man of her dreams and his songs.  

-------------------------------------------------------

Been a while, huh? Well take some Julieta and Agustín fluff!

[appledew]

Riptide is all set!

Made for  foliagekat on Twitter!

This plush is made of custom dyed minky, minky, and mochi minky. They are about 14 inches tall from the top of the hair to the bottom tips of the feet. All details are machine embroidered and appliqued, a few colors are colorblocked. This plush is slightly floppy, and needs support to sit up or stand.

WOW.

Starting with patterning, the base body is a heavily modified version of another plush, Gin! After the first prototype, I decided to give them more of the shape that their reference had (”shorter” torso, legs higher up on the base body and longer I think? More of a curve on the waist). The biggest reason that changes were done was because adding the stripe detailing turned out to be difficult on a body shape that didn’t match up. ^^;

Patterning the stripes was interesting. A few pieces were color blocked, literally like no more than 6 pieces on the base body, the rest were all appliqued without the more solid satin stitch; just a thin zigzag stitch. Since this little one was a beanie type plush i figured the Satin stitch would add unnecessary bulk. ^^; The only spat I have about the thin zigzag stitch-- feels like the lines arent as tidy as i would have liked-- and by lines I mean were colors overlap. One more thing to add; the colors are no more than 2 layers of fabric to reduce bulk! Some parts have up to what could have been 4 layers, but the way the applique was done to keep things flexible, 2 layers overlap each other. :)

BUT OVERALL, I think it was a good decision skipping out on the full satin stitch. :)

Some time in between patterning and prototyping I also dyed almost all of the colors on this plush; the black and darker color on the forehead are the only colors that didn’t need dyeing!

The chest, tail and hair were all patterned after the fact. The tail required multihooping! 

After assembly, I think i spent a few hours cleaning up the applique. The tail was SUPER messy, tbh! I’m not exactly sure why the tail had so many bits that needed to be snipped off, but it looks much better after a few cleanups!

Back tracking a tiny bit to the head pattern. So Riptide ha 2 unique side profiles, one with just a regular smooth looking head in the back; the other had a little cute tuft that puffed out... Small confession: I went with the smooth back because I ran out of one of the colors.😳 

I still havent learned my lesson to dye too much of a certain color.

And I think thats it! I thought I was out of my element when i accepted this little one, but wow. I’m happy to have had a chance to work on them! ^u ^

_________

Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/appledew

Trello queue: https://trello.com/b/FZKSnMo7/plushie-commission-to-do-list

Twitter: https://twitter.com/AppleDew_

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/apple.dew

Tumblr: http://appledew.tumblr.com/

Furaffinity: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/appledew

deviantArt: https://www.deviantart.com/appledew

[hikikolol]

*new addiction*

jungmo

coming to help one of the members to record properly didn’t warrant you to be slammed against the wall, but it did.

— — — — — — — — — — — —

jungmo never really liked being dragged out of his comfort zone. he likes being in his room, he’s too shy to interact with anyone other than his members, he loves laying down to binge on what he might’ve missed during his schedules, and overall, he’s just…jungmo.

everyone found it weird when he suddenly felt comfortable around the new producer that came to starship for their upcoming comeback. he stayed in the studio even when it wasn’t his turn yet, “hey jungmo can you get out? you’re getting really distracting” seongmin scolded the older as you deleted his fifth failed attempt of the night. “i’m not even doing anything..” jungmo mumbled but went up to get out of the room feeling deflated doing so, “i swear..hasn’t he been here for 2 hours already? he’s the last one to go yet he got here the earliest” the youngest ranted under his breath which made you chuckle, you knew the reason, it was easy. “he just wanted to support you guys i guess” “he knows supporting us doesn’t mean he could watch everything, he knows we record individually without anyone in the room” with a sigh, seongmin tried warming up again to finish the job up to his satisfaction.

“hey, it’s your turn” your head peaked out from the door to call for jungmo who was sitting on the couch outside the recording studio, “minhee’s done? i can come in?” you nodded in response and stepped inside. you felt jungmo following behind you as you sat on the swivel chair getting his part ready to be recorded. jungmo reached out to hug you from behind but was stopped when you turned to him, “recording first, jungmo” he threw his head back as a sign of desperation and stomped to the recording booth. “tell me when you’re ready, we’re starting with the intro”.

— — —

“you’re a fucking brat” you spat out as jungmo has already done a number on your chest. he was a prick. he called you into the recording booth, saying he needed help to adjust the microphone for him to take a seat. coming in didn’t warrant you to be slammed against the wall with your clothes being undone bit by bit as he engulfed your neck and chest, “wasn’t doing so good, think i need a little motivation, babe” jungmo whispered. i guess the only thing keeping you from stopping him was that, the recording booth was completely soundproof. no one to hear, no one to know.

he must’ve felt a little frustrated, your good little puppy suddenly turning against you, he wasn’t always like this so you just let him be and let him take the lead for the first time. “what are you gonna do, hmm? are you fucking me today, puppy?” you took a hold of his hair to make him look into your eyes. it held lust, want, need, it’s all it took for you to say yes to him. all caution of getting caught thrown out the window and just told him to hurry up, he nodded and took both of your pants off, “no foreplay, just put it in, we have to hurry up if you still want to have a part in that song” you wrapped your legs around him as he lifted you up, lining his member to your core and started to come in slowly. you had to bite down a moan as he adjusted himself into you, it was all too unreal, you never thought he’d be capable of doing it himself but here he is now, taking all of you as he now heightened his roughness and speed. you couldn’t help but let out such loud moans for him, one thing never changed though…no matter who’s on top, his whimpers and little moans never changed. maybe you just found your new addiction.

[side-shuffling-hyperfixations]

A prompt where P2 teaches P1 and P3 to knit as a way to relieve stress. Since although they don’t have as much spider instinct as P2, taping into those unfulfilled spider instincts does help them focus and relax. An overall fluffy prompt!

A/N: I opted for weaving rather than knitting for spider reasons, I hope that’s okay ^^

__________

“Listen, bro, it’s great that you’ve got this going for you and you want to share it with us. You know I’d totally be down to try a little hobby with you on any other day but today’s—today’s not good,” Peter Three admitted with a strained smile, drumming his fingertips haphazardly across the frame Peter Two had offered him. “I’m just waiting on that takeout and then I need to get back to my upgrades. My web shooters are acting up, I’d really prefer not to have a breakdown mid-swing and fall out of the sky…”

For reasons unknown to his brothers Peter Two laughed at that, shaking his head knowingly as he handed a second frame to Peter One, whose mouth twisted skeptically.

“I-I’m kind of scheduled out for this evening too,” he began, gaze already drifting to the window. “Can we do this when I get home from patrol?”

“If I said yes, would you even be up for trying or would you rather just faceplant into your bed without even bothering to change out of the suit? That’s what you’ve been doing every night for the past week,” Two pointed out, earning a huff of resignation. “Come on, guys. You’re both working so hard so constantly, I barely get to see you. I miss you. What happened to making family time a priority? Besides, this is something I do when I need to destress and I think you both could use a little downtime.”

“It’s not really downtime if I’m getting all frustrated and tangled up in fiddly bits,” Peter Three sighed, as if that wasn’t exactly what he intended to do with his suit upgrades.

“You’re a spider, aren’t you? This ought to come naturally once you get in touch with your instincts; shock of all shocks, you might even have some fun!” Peter Two teased. “At least let me show you the basics while we wait for the food to get here. It’s an hour of your time.” When they paused and failed to come up with any other excuses, he beamed. “Okay then! So those frames you’ve got are called lap looms; you use the loom to give your weave tension and support. We’re going to string up these notches here. You guys know the slip knot, right?”

Three snorted faintly. “I push my fingers into my eyes…It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache…”

“Heh, very funny but you’re gonna need those fingers now. Here, watch this.” He had chosen the warp thread he wanted ahead of time, thin, two-plied silver—fittingly web-like. Once he had the first notch, the next flowed easily into the next and the next and the next, over, under and back. Up, turn, around, down, bottom to top, with a small tug of satisfaction to be sure it held equal tension.

Peter One blinked, did a double take at the sturdy backbone of the weave that had materialized in his brother’s lap and stuttered a little. “Wait, what? Dude, how’d you do that so fast?”

Peter Two’s smile was equal parts shyness, hope and pride. “Pretty cool, huh? Like I said, it’s in a spider’s nature.”

“Yeah, but you got it done too fast!” Leaning over the colorful array of threads Two had put together, the youngest predictably snagged a vibrant red one and scooted over to sit beside him. “Can you do it again with this one? I wanna see!”

“You can try it out yourself. I started at the lower left on mine, right here—”

“Uh-huh…So you crossed the tail over and pulled it…like that?”

“Yep! That’s great, buddy, you got it in one!” Warmth filled his stomach to see Peter One’s eyes light up at his praise. “Now you bring it down here to tighten it up. You’re gonna be working in an S pattern…”

Realizing that he was going to be left behind if he didn’t make a move, Peter Three impulsively grabbed a pale gold thread (it echoed the highlights in Gwen’s hair when she was caught in the sun) and perched on Two’s other side. “Hang on, okay, we’re supposed to be doing this together! You said bottom left?”

His brothers are almost certainly underestimated the focus it took for this ‘little hobby’ to unfold into something truly tangible. They had designed their tech to produce a well-woven web in mere seconds. Why shouldn’t they be able to figure it out by hand?

Peter One’s fine motor skills were a little better than Peter Three’s, considering his handling of small, stubborn Lego pieces over the years, but thread was obviously more unpredictable than hard plastic. His tongue was stuck between his teeth in concentration as he combed and compressed, trying to keep it straight.  

Three had to keep setting his loom down to wring out his hands and crack his knuckles, trying to dispel the tremors from excess caffeine, but to Peter Two’s relief, he always picked it back up again before too long. He wasn’t about to be left out of brotherly bonding.

“And organic spiders just spit stuff like this out like it’s nothing,” he murmured pensively, mostly to himself, thought Peter Two had to suppress a smile when he overheard. Even with their stops and starts, they had no idea how fast they were finding their rhythm compared to a typical beginner. MJ had accepted defeat within four rows, citing a sore neck and stiff fingers.

By the time dinner arrived, they had about a hand’s width of weft each. Peter Three jumped when the deliveryman knocked, glancing between his loom and the door in slight disbelief.

“Was that an hour already?”

“Yep. Thanks for giving it a try, even if it was just for my sake.” Stretching languidly, Peter Two got up to collect the food and allow them a minute to inspect their work. As he shuffled the bags onto the kitchen counter, he put a casual, dismissive note into his voice. “If you want to put your looms over there, I can polish them off sometime in the next few weeks.”

“Wait, what? Why would you take it over? This one’s mine!” Peter One protested, clutching it more possessively in his lap.

“Come on, I know I’m bad at starting and stopping projects halfway through but I think I’ve got some kind of pattern worked out,” Peter Three agreed. “I want to do it the way it looks in my head. I don’t need you to do it for me!”

Exactly what he was hoping to hear, Two mused warmly as he feigned a shrug and got out some plates. Hopefully whenever their end results manifested, they would be pleased with them—as pleased as he was with the projects he’d been working on during their busy absences this past week. He’d surprise his brothers with their new scarves after dinner.

[holidaytorment]

the items from my recent work trip i'm going to claim reimbursement for, ranked & reviewed:

train fare from the hotel to o'hare - $3 to get from the loop to o'hare in about 45 minutes, the same amount of time it would have taken to drive (without the wait to get an uber or taxi). i support public transit.

parking at logan - but i don't think i green-line-to-red-line-to-silver-line support public transit (i also don't green-line-to-blue-line-to-airport-shuttle support it). $86 which is honestly reasonable for about 40 hours of parking. the sumner tunnel being closed is outside the purview of this review but if it weren't this would rank lower. accidentally parked on the roof during a heat advisory but got back home after dark so it kind of worked out, i think.

one night at a hotel in downtown chicago - hotel was nice enough but the building was about a hundred years old, which means the rooms were small. small enough that the tv was not opposite the bed, which you usually see in most normal hotels. small enough that the bathroom door had to be a double door, opening into the room. smaller rooms than the los angeles biltmore. appreciated that the conference room was above ground. catered food was good. paid $25 to check in early (??????) and this is called an upsell on the bill which i'm sure will make it real fun to justify. but also wouldn't have minded staying two nights. overall like $280 or so.

cab ride from o'hare to the hotel - this took about as long, if not a bit longer, than the train did. driver did not talk to me the entire time, which is a positive. views were uninspiring. $64

potbelly bacon egg and cheese breakfast sub - got this mainly because the line at dunkin was too long. that should've been a sign. $14 for this and an arizona iced tea, but the iced tea is the only thing i finished

items i'm not claiming reimbursement for because they are already paid for, but that i need to mention on the reimbursment form anyway, ranked & reviewed:

flight from chicago to boston: no one sat in the middle seat, so me and the guy sitting in the aisle seat got to spread out. my boss' boss sat two rows in front of me, but i pretended i didn't see her at all and she didn't make conversation with me on the plane or at either airport, which worked out because i was exhausted. read some le carre. got both pretzels and cookies from the flight attendant. could not smell the bathroom, despite being the same seat as below.

flight from boston to chicago: someone sat in the middle seat. flight was at like 8am and i closed my eyes for about an hour without falling asleep because it is a biological impossibility for me to sleep on a plane. opened my water bottle which lead to my water bottle spilling on my pants on account of the pressure difference. also read some le carre but not as much. could smell the bathroom.

items that i bought in and around my recent work trip but can't claim reimbursment for, ranked & reviewed:

hotel bar sazerac: love a sazerac, and this was a good one. i do not mind drinking at hotel bars when the bartenders are actually good at making drinks. i think if i'd ordered a margarita it would not have had much sugar in it. cannot reimburse because of alcohol on a federal grant

limes at wegman's: wegman's has pretty good produce. i needed the limes to make a baked chicken recipe (and a jack rose) on sunday night, both of which turned out alright. cannot reimburse because an item purchased to make food two days after i return is outside the purview of reimbursement for this trip.

iced tea at a o'hare: they only had green tea, but while i prefer black for an iced tea, green is a good change of pace. small size for $4.50 but that's airport pricing for you. cannot reimburse because both breakfast and lunch were provided, we have no reimbursement for snacks, and calling this dinner feels like a stretch.

qdoba burrito: order placed in the logan parking garage and picked up 20 minutes later. exactly as good, bad, and sad as i expected. the guy working there recognized me. won't reimburse because i don't want anyone to see my shame.

[dreamcatcherrs]

Hey! I just had a random idea I think would work good; a first date preference seems really cool :) (I hope you haven't done this already and I've just missed it) I love your writing <3

+ it seems very very cool indeed :)) hope you like it! <3

++ if you squint, a couple of nsfw references

first dates; mcyt x reader

dream:

restaurant

when it’s your first date, he won't go all out with a very fancy place

but generally likes spoiling you

a lot

but he’ll save that for later

as long as you feel comfortable, he’s happy

maybe you’d go to his place afterwards👀

to play video games of course🙄

he’s not shy at all on your frst date

and is pretty confident in himself that the date’s gonna go great

smooth pick-up lines

maybe a couple of touches here and there

compliments you the whole night

and really just wants a laugh with you

overall, he’s great at first dates

georgenotfound:

ice skating, his place

he likes for a first date to be pretty simple

just chilling

enjoying each other’s company like you usually would

but with some romantic undertones of course ;)

so going to an ice rink or hanging out at his place;

it would be perfect

I feel like george is definitely more nervous on a first date

just because the whole “first date” concept is very intimidating in his head

even though it isn't a lot different from when you hang out usually

… it’s just with a bit more feelings involved

he’d probably ask dream for advice before going on the date with you

he eases up once he gets comfortable with your presence

realising that it’s just you and he can always be comfortable with you :)

cute first date

sapnap:

concert

nick would definitely want to go to a concert with you

I’m sure anyone can vibe with his music taste

and even then, I don't think he cares which concert you go to

the experience is what matters to him

he’d slip in some pickup-lines every now and then

but his cheeks would be so red after every line he spoke

the whole night he just wants to kiss you

but resists, just because he is a little scared of rejection

puts his jacket around your shoulders when it gets colder

and maybe wraps an arm around your waist

as you just vibe to the songs

would kiss you when he walked you home if the date was good

and then text you the second he left

very nice first date

badboyhalo:

park

would bring rat along :D

you’d find a bench or similar to rest by after walking around for a while

and just sit there together

and eat some fresh foods you’d made before going there

and just chat for hours on end

playing around with rat every now and then

and also trying out the swing set nearby

where you’d push each other

you wouldn't have noticed how much time had passed before you both realised it was super dark

it’s a really comfortable and fun date

cause he’s just so easy to talk to

he’d definitely go for some hand-holding

and aim for a little peck on the cheek

technoblade:

escape room

this would literally be the perfect opportunity to get to know each other

and to see if you were worthy of the blood god

you’d help each other find the clues

he’d definitely tease you if he managed to find the key before you did

but then would gently pat your head

cause he couldn’t deny how cute you looked when you were all pouty

a great date

with lots and lots of fun

he’s very nervous to start off with

but manages to hide it behind his monotone voice

though he likes teasing you, he’s also very sweet

sometimes let’s you find the clues “first” even though he’d already spotted them

just to see the smile on your face

wilbur soot:

museum, café

of course wilbur would take you to one of these places

or even both

the museum first, then the café

why not get a learning experience out of the date?

and then get to know each other afterwards

on a more romantic level than usual

he would be really smooth with his movements

even if he was nervous

sneakily puts a hand on your waist

or goes to grab your hand

with no hesitation or shakiness

he’d sooo be the type to say “you’ve got something right here” pointing to your lip

and when you’d searched for the whipped cream on your lip to no avail, he’d lean over and wipe the non-existing cream away

very slowly

and then have a smirk on his face when he pulled away again

honestly, a big tease even for a first date

corpse husband:

dinner and movie

pretty classy, but very nice

he’d want a first date to not be too much

but still be enough to impress

he’d be pretty anxious of what you thought of him tbh

but those were mostly just the nerves talking

would spend a long time putting effort into making the dinner

after asking you what your favourite dish was

you’d eat it together, a candle lit in the middle of the table with some wine (all on my white tee)

and you’d just start up a conversation very naturally

getting to know each other on another level

and when you’d get to watching the movie, he’d definitely attempt to get closer to you

like by throwing an arm around your shoulders

pulling you closer to him

maybe a hand on your thigh

and a small make-out session

a very successful date to say the least

skeppy:

theme park

would want to do something really fun for a first date

so I feel like a theme park would be perfect for that

like, you’d just spend the whole say together

having the time of your life in the craziest rides

or the more chill ones

whatever you like

and in between you’d just take a break

and buy some waffles or churros to eat together

zak is veeery talkative

like, there would not be any worry about awkward silences

cause he would always have something to talk about with you

as for affection

he would probably go for holding your hand

and that’s probably his farthest goal for the day

he likes taking things slow

and just having a fun time with you

karl jacobs:

arcade

like skeppy, he would also wanna go someplace fun

yet not as crazy you know?

like, just hanging out and playing a range of different games with you

you bet he’d just be like “oh, I just wanna get this one prize.”

and when he finally won it, he’d hand it over to you

because he’d planned to give it to you from the start :]

he’s mostly just himself on your first date

giggly, cute, funny

he’s a little more nervous around you than ususal

but that's only natural

would leave a lot of affection on you

like, a supporting hand on your back when you're trying to win at a game

or hugging you tightly whenever either of you won

really just finds any excuse to give you affection

maybe you’ll end off the day with a little smooch😙

or spending the rest of the night playing video games at his or your place

fundy:

sight-seeing

he’d take you to so many buildings, statues, viewpoints etc.

he wants to explore the city with you

even if you both know it very well already

he’d want the memories of the sights to be with you

you’d take cute pre-couple photos by the sights

and grab some delicious lunch while sat right by one of the nicest sights

he’d be subtle with showing affection

like grabbing your hand when you’re about to go the wrong way

and then not let go of it for a while

or he’d let you borrow his sunglasses

to block out the sun in your face

he wouldn't lay heavy on showing affection on the first date

he’ll leave that for the second one ;)

quackity:

cooking together

chaotic but cute combo

I feel like he would really want to impress you

yet still be able to make you laugh

and this is just the perfect way to do just that

he’s surprisingly good at cooking when he tries

and remains his usual quackity alex funny self

he’d show you how to do different stuff

especially if you didn't know how to already

and would overall be very playful with you

throwing flour at you, splashing with water etc.

and then afterwards you would just chill on the couch and eat the dinner you’d just made

talking about the most random shit

and without realising it, the two of you would be cuddling

and you’d wake up in the morning to find you’d fallen asleep on each other🥺

punz:

laser tag

mans loves competition

and would definitely want to be a show-off to you

you'd have an room just for yourself

hiding behind walls and obstacles until you stumbled into each other

and he wouldn't hesitate to raise his laser gun at you

and shoot you right in the chest with a menacing laugh

after a while it’d just be a battle between two

tackling each other all the time

and at some point he’d have you up against the wall

and as you were about to kiss

you’d lift you gun at him and shoot him right in the chest

which won you the game

afterwards, he’d follow you home

and maybe give you that kiss he tried to give you before

he’d be very down to stay with you for the night if you wanted him to

awesamdude:

the beach

you’d bring a bunch of fun activities with you

like card games, a beach volley game, etc.

and maybe even join in on a game of mini golf near you

you could also just be chilling on your towels

under the sun or under the shade

whatever your preference is

and then go into the water eventually

playing around together and just having fun

splashing water at each other

he’d sneak his way over to you

and just lift you up from under the water and onto his shoudlers

just laughing at the way you were screaming for him to let you down

when you got on the shore again, it felt easier to be affectionate with each other

you’d definitely go for ice cream on the way home

holding hands👉👈

eret:

karaoke bar

it would literally be the funniest time with him

you’d gotten one of those private rooms

so it would just be the two of you in the room

and you’d have so much fun choosing your favourite songs

and sometimes you'd just sit there and chat

while karaoke music played in the background with none of you singing

he’d want to duet with you at some point

bringing you close to him just to see you get all flustered

I could definitely imagine a first kiss right then

if it had all gone right throughout the night

when you were on your way back home

he’d lend you his jacket

and just tell you to keep it

“I’ll just pick it up tomorrow.”

tommy:

the zoo

tommy would be walking around commenting on literally every animal

“y/n look. hey, y/n. look at this ones’ face.”

takes a lot of pictures of the animals

and of you with the animals

and when you suspiciously asked if he was taking pictures of you after you’d spotted him

he’d just brush it off, immediately hiding his phone away

“of you? obviously, it was of the giraffe behind you.”

“tommy, there is no giraffe behind me.”

doesn't show any affection

he’s super nervous about the whole “touch” thing

so he just stays away from it

but if you were to grab his hand

he wouldn't pull away

he’d just stand there with red ass fucking cheeks

and would be praying for the animals to save him from any awkward situations

tubbo:

picnic

you’d be picking flowers together

flowers for the flower boy :)

and even make flower crowns if you felt really creative

enjoying the delicious foods you'd brought with you

he’d also be quite intimidated by affection, like tommy

but would very very subtly show it

only a little bit though

like, it would be pretty obvious whenever he got caught up staring at you

just looking at you as you picked at the grass outside of the blanket you were sat on

and sometimes he’d place a hand on you without really realising that that was something more unusual than you were used to

you’d bring a bracelet kit

and make cute little matching bracelets for each other

a really enjoyable date overall

with lots of laughter and chatter

ranboo:

an aquarium

even though c!ranboo is clearly not the biggest fan of water

this ranboo finds it quite fascinating

a pretty chill and easy-going first date

exactly what he wants

you’d walk around the whole aquarium

and make fun of the fishes with funny-looking faces

and then proceed to take pictures of each other by the fishes with the funny-looking faces

he would find it so adorable whenever you would point at one of the sea-creatures

and just look so amazed by it

he would literally almost melt right beside you

the closest thing to affection he would do, is putting a hand on your waist

it doesn't really progress further than that unless you initiate it

a proud moment of his was when he almost fell into the penguin inclosure

and you couldn’t stop laughing at it

a successful date to his eyes

___________________________________

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[mypoisonedvine]

𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗽𝗶𝗹𝗹 || dark!alex kerner x reader

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 ◦ alex has been waiting so long for you to figure out he's the guy you should be with, but you just see him as your best friend. he's tired of being a virgin, and he's tired of hoping that someday you'll wake up and realise you're meant to be together— if he can't wake you up, at least he can put you to sleep.

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁 ◦ 6.7k

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 ◦ smut (noncon, somnophilia, creampie), drugging, obsession, "nice guy"/incel vibes, a bit of possessiveness, very slight degradation, male virginity loss, overall just alex being super unsettling and awful lmao

“I’m gonna run to the washroom, watch my drink?” you requested casually. Alex nodded quickly, heart starting to beat a bit faster as he watched you weave your way through the crowded bar, leaning back a bit to make sure you were out of sight for good.

He took a few glances back and forth at the people around to make sure no eyes were on him, leaning in closer to the bar to try to conceal what he was doing— reaching into his inner jacket pocket and fishing for what he’d bought just a few days ago, waiting for this moment. He was absolutely terrified that someone would catch him— that you would catch him— but he was willing to risk it in exchange for such an incredible reward.

After struggling for a second due to his hands shaking slightly, he found the plastic baggie and discreetly slipped it out, not even looking at it as he opened it close to his chest; he figured if he stared straight ahead it would be less suspicious.

He managed to get the bag open and lean forward just enough to dump the contents into your drink as it rested on the bar, looking around absent-mindedly to remain nonchalant— except that when he leaned back to see if the powder had dissolved easily, he found that he’d missed the glass entirely and dumped the light blue substance right onto the bar.

“Scheiße!” he frantically cursed under his breath as he whipped his head around to make sure no one had seen, trying to decide how to recover from this. Thinking quickly, he grabbed the glass and held it up to the edge of the bar, brushing the powder with his hand across the smooth surface and right over the slope into your drink; it hit the alcohol and started to dissolve quickly as he used his finger to push in the excess on the wooden bar before brushing the rest away with his jacket sleeve. He held the glass up to his face to look at the liquid closely, still seeing some remnants of the powder and trying to swirl the drink a bit to encourage it to fade away: if you saw something by the time you got back, he’d have to start all over again.

“When I said ‘watch my drink,’ I didn’t mean it that literally,” you giggled, and he jumped, not having realized you had returned. Considering your casual attitude and your hands eagerly reaching for the glass, you must not have seen anything leading up to this moment— and thank heavens for that.

He watched a little too intently as you took the drink from his hand and took a sip, waiting to see if you had any reaction, but you set it down without saying anything. “Thanks,” you broke the silence after swallowing, “god knows this place is probably full of creeps.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” he agreed awkwardly. There was one benefit to being so deep in the friendzone: you trusted him. Right now, that and some pharmaceutical support were all he had going for him.

He wrung his hands nervously as he hoped that the second would come through for him. The guy he bought this stuff from said it was guaranteed to work, but Alex didn’t necessarily trust the word of a drug dealer selling daterape drugs. Not that he thought the label of “daterape” was very fair— if he could get you on a date, he wouldn’t have to do stuff like this in the first place! But after years of being your best friend, your partner in crime, your confidante, and the constant shoulder to cry on while a carousel of abusive assholes treated you like shit and kicked you to the curb, you still didn’t get the fucking picture. So no, this wasn’t a date; it was just two friends getting drinks, and one friend finally getting what he deserved from the other.

He took a swig of his own drink to try to calm his nerves; nursing the neck of a bottle of beer made him realize he got lucky that you ordered something served in a glass, since getting powder down a bottle would’ve been a pain.

Quickly the conversation returned to the mundane: your latest break-up, his week at work, your favorite bands, his favorite movies. He really did enjoy being your friend, all things considered, he just needed more. And as the night continued without much sign of the pill kicking in— even as you finished your drink— he worried he wouldn't get it.

But then, finally, he noticed the subtle signs: you were blinking a bit more often, and for longer. You seemed to be breathing a bit slower, staring off into space. "Hey, you with me?" he prompted, waving his hand in front of your face to get your attention. "Sorry, my story was boring—"

"No, it's not that, I'm sorry," you shook your head.

"Then what's up?" he asked, adding faux concern to his tone.

“I just…" you sighed and started over again. "Let’s head out soon, I’m getting ready to turn in,” you decided.

“It’s only ten!” Alex pointed out with a laugh.

“Fuck, really? I thought it was later,” you frowned.

“Who knew you were such a lightweight?” he teased, pushing you on the shoulder and getting a playful shove back— but he could feel that you were a little weak, and he saw you almost falter in your balance. “Hey, you don’t look so good, let’s go outside for some fresh air.”

You nodded and took his hand, letting him guide you through the crowd and out the back door.

The overwhelming noise that had been present inside was muffled in the damp alleyway, just the distant roar of a thousand conversations and the heavy bass of the music left now. He watched you take a deep breath, closing your eyes. "You good?" he prompted.

"Yeah," you decided, but your voice sounded a little heavy. "Let's walk to the train station…"

He nodded and walked beside you, but you hardly made it a few steps before losing your balance. “Woah!” he laughed as you stumbled, thankfully catching you just in time, and tried not to get too caught up in how amazing it felt to hold you in his arms. “I think you’ve had a little too much to drink…”

“Alex,” you mumbled as you started to go limp, clearly fighting to keep your eyes open (and losing).

“I’m gonna take you home, okay?” he offered as you started to fade out.

He kept that promise; he just took you to his home instead of your own.

It was a bit of a struggle to drag an unconscious body back to his apartment without arousing suspicion, but thankfully it was only a couple blocks and with his your arm slung over his shoulders it was pretty easy for any passersby (of which there were very few at this hour) to assume it was just a chivalrous boyfriend helping his date after one too many drinks.

The hardest part was actually getting his keys and unlocking his door without dropping you. Once you were both inside, though, he grunted slightly as he slung you over his shoulder and carried you to the bedroom, laying you down on the bed and looking down at you as he caught his breath.

He was embarrassingly eager; he was already rock hard just from seeing you like this, laying on his bed. It’s not that he got off on you being passed out, but from the feeling that he could do whatever he wanted to you— and the knowledge that he was going to.

Finally, after all this time of being just your friend, he would get what he’d been dreaming of from the beginning.

He was slow and patient, for once, as he sat down beside you on the bed, trailing his fingers over your face, brushing your hair out of the way tenderly. You looked so beautiful this way, peaceful in a way he was almost jealous of; he closed his eyes as he leaned down and kissed you softly, moving his lips even though yours were slack and still.

Past the taste of alcohol, there was something distinctly unique to you, and he took in a deep breath as he sought more of it, adjusting himself until he was on top of you... just having you beneath him was such a rush.

He licked over your lips, even nibbled on them before holding your jaw so he could open your mouth wider and taste inside of it. “Baby,” he whispered to you, heart swelling at the chance to finally call you something that friends don’t call each other— only lovers. “Baby,” he said again, mumbled into the kiss, “you’re so beautiful…”

He precariously balanced on one arm while using the other to feel all over your body through your clothes— and even under them, for a moment, as his hand awkwardly snaked up your shirt and squeezed your tits through your bra.

Suddenly he pulled back with a new desperation, sitting up and breaking the kiss as he started to undress you. “Let’s get you out of these clothes,” he cooed at you quietly, starting to lift your shirt to expose a bit of your hips and stomach.

It was pretty difficult to push your shirt up, since your weight was holding the back of it down, and so he had to awkwardly lift your limp upper body to finally pull the fabric aside before he laid you back down and carefully— gently, with reverence— exposed your bra which itself he pulled down with much less care.

“Oh, god,” he groaned as he got an eyeful, and then a handful, of your tits. “Fuck, wanted to touch you for so long…”

You were so warm, in fact you were hot to the touch, and he hoped his hands weren’t too cold for you… but then again, you couldn’t feel any of it, could you? Did you even care?

For cold hands or not, your nipples started to get harder and he smiled to himself. “You’re sensitive here, just like I imagined. I’m gonna suck on them,” he promised as he started to lean down, pushing them together a bit to make them easier to reach. With a hum he wrapped his lips around one bud and closed his eyes, swirling his tongue and moaning at the taste of your skin. Already his hips were rocking forward into the air just a bit, his cock throbbing and eager to be inside you. But he couldn’t stop doing this to deal with that, couldn’t stop suckling on your perfect tits, going back and forth and massaging them both as he let his tongue explore you.

“God, you’re so fucking perfect,” he groaned against your skin, “you’ve got such perfect tits… you like being sucked here, don’t you? I bet your pussy’s getting so wet.”

As his cock flexed in his pants again, he found the strength to let go so he could move on to better things.

“Let’s find out,” he decided as he sat up and moved down your body to start opening your jeans.

If he thought your shirt was awkward to remove, your jeans were a whole other story; he had to fiddle with the button and fly for quite a while since his hands were starting to shake from the adrenaline rush of it all, and then it took several hard yanks to get the tight denim down your legs. He considered just getting them down enough to do his business and be on with it, but decided it would be better to see all of you— and so he stood up off the bed for a moment, though it felt a bit awkward physically with his cock doing its best try to bust right out of his trousers, and pulled the jeans off over your feet which he also relieved of their socks.

“Aw, you even have pretty feet,” he cooed as he cradled one in his hand briefly before climbing back up over you— after all he’d seen them before when you wore sandals and while he’d always found it a bit titillating when you wore them with your toenails painted in bright colours, they were absolutely nowhere near the main event tonight.

His hands ran over your legs, admiring the smoothness of your skin as he carefully held and lifted each one, moving them out further to spread your legs. Again, they were heavier than he expected as dead weight, and the softness of the bed meant that they sort of rolled back a bit so he had to move them more than he expected at first, but it was worth it to have you spread out beneath him like this with only your panties and rolled up shirt to cover you.

“I can just… pull these aside…” he mumbled as he hooked a finger into the fabric of your panties, revealing your cunt— and god, just the sight of it nearly pushed him over the edge right then and there. What a waste it would’ve been to come this far and just end up coming in his pants at the sight of you, so it was a good thing he held it off just barely. “Mein Gott, you have such a beautiful pussy,” he sighed. “It smells good… I wanna taste it. I’ve never tasted a pussy before…”

Carefully, he leaned in and gave an experimental lick to your folds, moaning softly at the taste. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting but he liked it more than he thought he would, going in again to get a more thorough taste. That said, as soon as he started to push his tongue into you, he knew he needed to feel inside you with something much more capable of appreciating every detail of you. He breathed heavily as he quickly brought his fingers up to your entrance, pushing in one but adding a second right away once he felt the warm perfection of your channel. This he’d done before— fingering, that is— and it had been rather lackluster so he hadn’t realised how much he would enjoy it when it was you; you were so much warmer, and wetter, and tighter… his fingers curled slightly to press against your walls, his attempt to feel every detail of your body, and he moaned as he sucked on your clit while he pumped his fingers.

One more flex of his cock against the confines of his trousers made one thing very clear: now, or never.

“Fuck,” he groaned beneath his breath as he sat up quickly, pulling his fingers out of you to use two hands to fumble over his belt and jeans, “need to be inside you— m’gonna fuck you baby, you want it? Yeah, you wanna be fucked, don’t you?”

You were, of course, still and silent… but your pussy was wet, you obviously wanted him.

He shouldn’t have rushed it quite so much but the moment he pulled his cock out, he found himself leaning forward and hovering over you again, swiping the head through your folds to coat himself in your wetness. As soon as he felt your entrance, he pushed all the way inside.

“Fuck!” he moaned loudly at the overwhelming feeling of you— so hot he thought he might burn up and he wouldn’t even mind it— already bucking his hips as he thrusted quickly. Lost in the feeling, he threw his head back for a moment and blindly searched with his hand until he found a breast to grab onto. “Oh my god, you feel so good, baby…”

He didn’t have much freedom to move his legs since he’d only pushed his pants down just enough to get inside you, but he found a way to make it work anyways, just from pure desperation. After a moment, he looked down at your sleeping face, tossing around slightly as his thrusts rocked your unconscious body, and you looked so angelic that he just had to lean down to kiss you again. So he did, and he did so hungrily, passionately, moans echoing into your mouth, as he already felt himself getting closer and closer to the edge.

“Taking me so good,” he praised roughly, “feels like you were made for me… you’re fucking tight, too, how am I supposed to pull out when you’re this tight? Oh fuck, I have to come inside you— I can’t pull out, you feel too good, and you’re not awake to yell at me anyways…”

Truth be told, he had no plan for when you woke up tomorrow, sore and leaking his come. He’d never thought that far ahead, not even when he was buying the sedative for your drink. All he could think about was this moment, this exact place that he knew he was meant to be: inside you.

“Gonna fill you with it,” he promised with a grunt as he kissed his way across your cheek to the crook of your neck where he buried his face as he thrusted faster. “O-oh god, I’m close, I’m so fucking close, just— just like that, baby— fuck!”

He may have caught a little glimpse of heaven as he came inside you, each pulse of his orgasm running straight down to the base of his cock and making his balls tighten so hard that it would’ve probably been painful were it not for the euphoria superseding everything. He gave you a few more weak thrusts, not pulling out very far since he couldn’t manage being anything but buried completely inside you, before the waves subsided and he collapsed on top of you.

“You’re so amazing, baby, Mein Gott,” he breathed as he kissed all over your face, “look how fast you made me come, you’re fucking perfect.”

He let himself rest for a little while, content to just stay inside you for as long as he could stand it, before sitting back up again and very carefully pulling himself out of you.

That first one only took the edge off; now that he was thinking somewhat clearly again, he could take the time to do this right— he carefully pulled your panties down your legs, tossing them aside along with your shirt and bra once he’d figured out how to get them off somehow.

He really savored you this time: kissed you all over, talked softly to you about everything he couldn’t wait to do to your pliant body, ran his hands over anywhere he could reach. He even played with your clit, watching the way it made your walls flex which pushed a bit of his come out every time. “I love the way your pussy looks, baby, it’s so fucking sexy,” he grinned. “And you know what? I think it looks even better with my come leaking out of it. You want more? I can give you more, baby, I have so much left to give— I’m gonna use you until my balls are empty and all my come is inside you. We’ve got all night, after all.”

He stripped himself as well, wanting to feel your skin against his this time, and stroked himself for a moment as he stared down at your body, laying there at his disposal. He couldn’t even count how many times he had jerked off imagining being with you, and now his dreams were coming true, if maybe not exactly the way he would’ve predicted.

On his knees between your spread legs, he lifted your hips up and propped you up just how he wanted you before pushing inside, groaning instantly not only from your warmth but also because of the way his own come eased his path and left you dripping wet. “Oh fuck,” he breathed, placing one hand beside your head so he could hover over you while the other squeezed your hips tightly.

But now that he’d already come before, he had some real stamina to work with and that gave him time to move you into a new position— just for fun, he turned you onto your stomach and fucked you from behind for a while. He was definitely a breast man all things considered, but he was absolutely not one to let a great ass go to waste; he loved watching yours ripple each time he slammed into you, pushing your back down to force it to arch a bit.

“You probably like taking it from behind, don’t you? Is this how you liked to get fucked?” he taunted with a groan. “Yeah, I think you like it— I think you’re a bit of a slut, hm?”

He took your absence of response as a yes, squeezing handfuls of your ass before spanking you a few times for good measure.

After that, he pushed your legs up to your shoulders, groaning in awe of such a lovely view of your pussy and face at the same time. This time when he pushed his cock into you, he felt himself hit the very end of your body— he moaned as he realized his cock was using all of you, really claiming you as his own. He needed to come this deep in you, he needed it like he had never needed anything before.

Soon enough it ended up with your legs draped over his shoulders and his hands roughly grabbing at your tits, and that transitioned naturally into him slipping his arms under your back and holding you tight as he fucked you fast, rough, needy— animalistic, near the end.

He let his mind run wild with some insane idea of what it might be like if you were awake: in his fantasy you were begging him for more, moaning about how he was the best you ever had, digging your nails into his back as he brought you to ecstasy with only his cock. You seemed like the type to cry with joy when you came really hard, at least that’s what he’d imagined before, and so he thought he might kiss your tears away while he spoke his little praises to you, hearing your sounds of pleasure right against his ear.

Suddenly he pressed his lips to yours again, almost wishing you could kiss him back properly but appreciating that this was the best he could do for now— and it still did plenty for him, making his cock start to flex inside you as his second orgasm drew closer.

“You’ll make me come, baby— you’re so good, I’m gonna come in you again,” he whispered against your lips. “Oh, Liebling, you’re going to be so full of my come, do you think you can take it all? Can you take everything, baby?”

It was different from the first one: in some ways more intense, kind of building on the last, and in some ways more subdued as he knew a bit more of what to expect by now. But it was no less incredible, and he moaned loudly into his unrequited kiss as he filled you once again.

Once the most intense pangs of sensation had faded, once the ringing in his ears had stopped, and once he’d (mostly) caught his breath, he sat up slowly and looked down at where your bodies were joined. It had, understandably, made a bit of a mess to come inside you twice in a row— he hopped up from the beg on slightly-wobbly legs to retrieve a damp cloth, cleaning his cock first before giving your pussy at least a cursory, exterior wipe down like any gentleman would.

He knew there was no real point in getting you fully cleaned up since he’d be back to use you again soon enough. But that was a ways out from now since he definitely needed a while to recover.

With a parting kiss to your forehead and a brief search for his boxers, Alex left the bedroom to forage the kitchen for something to restore some energy. He settled on a coffee (there was still plenty of night left that he would definitely prefer to be awake for), an apple, and some orange-chocolate biscuits, which he enjoyed while he turned on the TV and watched whatever was left before the end of broadcast.

Of course, with nothing interesting to watch, he found himself not really paying much attention as his mind wandered to other things. Most of all, for the first time he considered his plan for after the pill wore off and you had questions. The most thorough solution would be to give you a bath to get his fingerprints off of your skin and his come out of you, then to redress you in your clothes from the bar and simply say that you passed out and he gave you the bed while he slept on the couch.

Another option, though more dangerous, might be a bit more fun: he could leave at least some of his come inside you before he redressed you, just to know he’d left a bit of himself behind.

And, of course, there was always his last resort, perhaps the most obvious but highest risk solution. He could admit that something had happened, but try to convince you that it was of your doing, a drunken initiation that you simply couldn’t remember. But even then, it would all depend on what you remembered of the moments at the bar before blacking out; and considering the thorough beating your pussy had been receiving so far tonight and would continue to be receiving, the odds were probably pretty low that he could convince your hungover self in the morning that nothing had happened. Not that Alex would know, but he had a pretty good feeling that a sore vagina is not a common side effect of a hangover for women.

His cock started to stir as he imagined the absolute best case scenario when you woke up in the morning.

Alex, what happened last night? Did we have sex?

Yes, baby, and it was amazing, I just wish you could remember it.

Oh, Alex, I’ve been waiting so long for you to just man up and take me— you’re all I ever wanted.

I know, baby, but I’m sorry I had to go about it that way, giving you that pill in your drink. I just had to be sure you wouldn’t say no to me, I couldn’t take it if you did.

I’d never say no to you, Alex, and I never, ever will. I wouldn’t even know how, not after last night— I know that we’re meant to be together now. You shouldn’t apologize for drugging me either, I should be thanking you. We can finally be together, I can finally be all yours… come here and make love to me again, I promise I’m going to remember it this time— I’ll remember it for the rest of my life.

And to make up for such a one-sided night of passion before, he decided that this time you’d be loud and proud, even bordering on dominant by riding him with reckless abandon— bouncing happily on his cock and bringing yourself pleasure like you’ve never known before. But, of course, you’d both be well aware who was really in charge, who you really belonged to.

Alex, I’m yours— my body is yours, my heart is yours, everything, it’s all yours… I swear, nobody’s ever made me feel like you do, you can have me whenever you want me— use me, Alex, I love you, I love you!

Fuck, he was hard again. Way harder than he had any right to be considering how he’d spent the night so far. He could even just barely see a little stain of precum on his boxers by the tip of his cock, hard to make out with only the dim, blue-ish glow of the TV to see by.

But thankfully, while you were here, no boner would go to waste— he stood up and stretched away the soreness that had settled in from sitting on the couch for a while, before walking to his bedroom and cracking the door open. You were laying there, exactly as he’d left you, and even though it was no surprise at all he still smiled to himself proudly.

“Hey baby,” he grinned as he slipped off his boxers and hopped onto the bed beside your motionless body, “you’ve been waiting for me, huh?”

He ran his fingers down your stomach, over your thighs, then came back up to start to touch your pussy. He still couldn’t believe how soft and silky it was, you were just too good to be true— and here you were, spread out on his bed for him to use as much as he liked, his best friend turned into his own personal sex doll.

The only shame was that the drug would wear off eventually, and he couldn’t just use you this way forever. It was only one night, at least until he found a way to do it again, and he needed to make the most of it.

So, not looking to waste any more time, he climbed up on top of you and rubbed his cock over your pussy— wet and spread out on display for him, though even wetter after he took a moment to pull back and spit on it— while his mouth laved at your hardening nipples. Honestly, he could probably come just from this, just from rubbing himself on you and sucking on your tits, but why do that when he could fuck you again?

He held your legs apart for himself as he pushed inside, purring as he felt your swollen channel struggle slightly to accommodate him. “Aw, it’s not too big for you, is it baby?” he taunted you with a smirk. “You can take it all, right? Yeah you can, that’s my good girl…”

He fucked you a little faster right away, focusing his hands and mouth on your breasts for a while and wondering if he might find the self-discipline to pull out and come on your tits this time. Probably not, but it was fun to imagine. He always thought your tits just deserved to be covered in his come, though, ever since you wore that one dress that showed them off just a little too much and it made him too horny to even really be jealous that you were putting yourself on display like that.

You dressed a little too provocatively, all things considered; he never got his head around on how all these controlling douchebag boyfriends of yours let you leave the house like that. If you were his girlfriend, he’d treat you loads better than any of them did, but one thing he’d be sure of is to dress you up in baggy sweatshirts as much as he could get away with. No more of those tops with the straps as thin as a noodle and the jeans so tight that every guy who walked by was obviously staring at you. A body as lovely as yours would need to stay Alex’s-eyes-only, if you two were ever going to end up together. But obviously, tonight proved that Alex was more confident than ever that that could never really happen. It was nice to play pretend for the night, though.

“You’re taking it so good, baby, look at you,” he groaned as he sat up a bit to get a glimpse of your cunt stretched wide around his cock. “Can you believe it fits? I can, I know you were made to take it— ‘cause you’re my girl, huh? All mine…”

For all intents and purposes, he was talking to himself; but as stupid as it was, it worked.

“Yeah, you’re all mine,” he continued, fucking you faster, “this pussy belongs to me, all my come inside it makes that pretty fucking clear, don’t you think? Such a beautiful little pussy and it’s all mine.”

Overcome by it all, he leaned down to rest his head beside yours while he fucked you, feeling a thin layer of sweat gather around most of his body from the exertion of fucking you as hard as he was.

“You’re never gonna let anybody else touch you,” he demanded against your shoulder, “‘cause you’re mine, baby, and nobody else is ever gonna fuck you… just me, you’re gonna be mine, Liebling.”

He heard you let out a little sigh and at first it was the hottest thing he’d ever experienced— the closest he’d ever gotten to hearing you moan for him— but then he pulled back and saw your eyes blinking open and staring straight up at him…

And suddenly it was the most terrifying thing he’d ever experienced.

A rush of adrenaline— much less enjoyable than before— shot through him and left him petrified as he stared back at you.

“...A-Alex?” you croaked out weakly. “What’s happening?”

Even in his state of terror, he was moving on pure instinct: and his instinct was to keep fucking you. He couldn’t stop, not even staring you down like this, not even moments away from facing the very terrible consequences of his very terrible actions. “You’re dreaming,” he blurted out suddenly, suppressing a moan as he felt you squirm a bit beneath him— it made you even tighter when you struggled. “This is just a dream…”

You reached up, a pathetically weak attempt to push him away, and he quickly pinned your arms down beside your head.

“You’re just dreaming, baby,” he repeated in a groan, “a really, really amazing dream.”

You whimpered a bit but didn’t say anything else, eyes falling shut again; he carefully leaned down to press his face into your neck, kissing along your pulse and up to your ear.

“You’ve dreamed about this before, haven’t you?” he whispered to you softly. “You’ve dreamed about how good it would be if you let your best friend fuck you. And it feels good, doesn’t it? I dreamed about this too. For as long as I knew you.”

When he looked up at your eyes again, they were still shut, and your breathing started to slow down again. He couldn’t say for sure that you were asleep quite in the same way you had been before, but you weren’t awake the way you’d been before, either.

The safest option, of course, would be to stop now— but he was too close to coming a third time and he just couldn’t bring himself to stop moving when the slick friction was just so fucking good.

He tried not to be too rough so he wouldn’t jostle you awake, and even just that took all that was left of his willpower; it wasn’t all too much later that he came inside you one last time, whispering to you about how this might be the last time, but that he hopes you enjoyed your strange little dream about making love with your best friend.

Truth be told, he didn’t mean to fall asleep in the manner that he did— that being on top of you— but the coffee did little to keep him up compared to the sedative of three orgasms and your perfect pussy keeping him warm all night…

By the time he woke up, though, you two had migrated apart slightly, though you were still tangled up in his arms with your head on his chest.

Smiling down at you, he let himself run his fingers lightly over your back, over your arm draped on his chest, before he felt you start to stir with the sunlight in the window shining on your face.

You hummed a little, starting to move, but he thought he might’ve caught the moment you realised you were laying next to someone— and you looked up at him with those pretty eyes all confused. “Alex?” you groaned.

“Morning,” he greeted, trying to mimic the hungover exhaustion that tinted your voice.

“Oh Christ are we—” you choked, glancing down at his bare chest. “I think we’re naked.”

“That… seems to be the case, yes,” he agreed awkwardly.

“Did we…?” you prompted, looking up at him in a way that made it painfully ambiguous what answer you might prefer.

“I don’t know, we were both pretty wasted,” he offered, banking on you not remembering him being much more composed than you when you passed out. “What do you remember last?”

“Um, the bar…” you trailed off. “And we were walking outside…”

“Yeah, that’s kind of where my memory cuts off, too,” he bluffed with a nervous chuckle.

He saw your eyes get wide for a second before they darted away, and he raised an eyebrow. “Oh… oh shit,” you choked as you sat up suddenly, trying to cover yourself as you searched near the bed for your discarded clothes.

“What? What’s going on?” he asked quickly.

“I, uh, remember one other thing,” you explained pointedly, finally finding your panties and slipping them back on under the covers.

“Well, what is it?” he asked, but you ignored him as you searched for your bra. “Hey,” he barked, grabbing your shoulder as he sat up, and finally you faced him again, “what do you remember?”

“Well,” you sighed, “I, uh… I think I can say with complete confidence that we fucked last night.”

“Wait, what? Are you sure?” he pressed, sitting up a little straighter.

“I… remember,” you explained, “just a little bit.”

He just prayed that you didn’t remember that little bit where he drugged you. “Well, what happened?”

“I don’t know, okay? I just remember you on top of me and—”

“And?”

You swallowed thickly, and he had to hide a smirk when he realized what the rest of your sentence was. And it felt good.

“I should go…” you mumbled awkwardly, and he reached out to grab your arm.

“Wait, please,” he begged, and you looked back at him with watery eyes. “Look, I’m not sure what happened last night, but maybe it wasn’t a mistake— I mean, how can we be sure if we don’t give it a shot?”

You tilted your mouth a bit as you considered it.

“I mean, they say alcohol takes away your inhibitions, not that it gives you new ideas, right?” he added. “So we both got way too drunk and… if this is where we ended up, then maybe this is what we both really wanted all along.”

He scooted a bit closer to you on the bed, wrapping his arms around you. You sighed as you leaned into his chest, relaxing a bit. “I just don’t want to lose this,” you breathed. “You know: this.”

“Of course,” he agreed, “we’re always gonna be best friends, nothing can change that.”

He leaned in to kiss your temple… then your cheek… then just below your ear...

“Alex,” you breathed as he slowly laid you down and pressed you back into the mattress, but you jumped a little bit when he pressed his cock against your thigh. “Alex!”

“C’mon, baby, let’s remember together,” he encouraged with kisses all over your neck, grinning as your back arched.

“But… but we’re just friends,” you protested.

“Not anymore,” he purred. “I don’t remember much, but I remember you begging me for more. You loved my cock way too much for us to just be friends now, Liebling.”

For all the conflict on your face, your legs spreading open for him was pretty unambiguous. Your mind might have missed the memo, but your body was already used to him. With you conscious he could make you come around him, he could hear you moan his name, he could make you beg him to come inside you… the possibilities were really endless.

He should’ve known he’d never have the self-control to let it just be one night; he was a goner from the beginning, he’d do anything to have you— lie, steal, kill, spike your drink— and he wasn’t going to let you get away so easily, not when you were finally right here in his arms.

“You’re gonna be mine, baby,” he whispered in your ear as he slowly pushed his cock inside you once again, “all mine.”

[bellesowl]

head over heels

- multiple characters

⤷ kuroo, iwaizumi, atsumu, sakusa 

genre: fluff!! ; established relationship

synopsis: in which they realize how head over heels they are for you

word count: 1.4k total :))

warnings: very very slight manga spoilers in iwa’s, i kinda curse a little

- a/n: hi! this is very very late for valentines but i wanted to post it anyways! also, this is very cheesy but when is anything i write not cheesy anyways? & please, i literally write for the same four people BYEE. oh & thank u @omisluvr for beta-ing this ily mwah

- kuroo tetsurou

he falls for your quick wit & intelligence 

we all know that kuroo is known for his wit and for being a big, big nerd LMAOAKJSC 

i think he would appreciate a s/o who’s on his level academically & could compete with him, esp cause he’s so competitive

and we know how quick with his words this man is- it’s probably one of the reasons tsukishima actually listens to this mf tbh

i feel like he would want a s/o who could bite back and put him in his place every once in a while

probably finds it super hot 

“tetsurou!” you yell, glaring at him. 

he raises his hands in alarm, amusement and mischief swimming in his eyes. he had embarrassed you in front of the whole class, immediately correcting you when you claimed that the reaction on the board was an endothermic reaction when in reality, it was an exothermic reaction. sure, he was right, but he didn’t have to point it out like that!

“what?” he questions, “it’s not my fault you lacked docosapentaenoic acid when you were a child.” he finishes with a smug smirk on his face. 

the scowl on your face morphs into a smirk at his words and his own falls at your face. “i think you mean docosahexaenoic acid, oh wise one?” you ask, sarcasm dripping from your tone.

he recovers quickly, yelling about how easy it is to mistake the two. at your laugh, he realizes just how lucky he and whipped he is for you because this? he wouldn’t trade this for the world.

- iwaizumi hajime 

he falls for your independence 

lord knows that having to deal with oikawa practically all his life + the seijoh third years, my man would not be able to deal with a s/o who is super dependent on him

sure, he finds it cute when you’re being clingy & want a hug or a kiss but someone who constantly insecure or is just overall emotionally dependent on him - i feel like it would be a slight turnoff 

now, if you feel insecure, tell him because he would also def appreciate your honesty and that wouldn’t necessarily be seen as a problem

it becomes a problem when you push all your problems onto him and expect him to fix it

but a s/o who can work out their problems on their own but still comes to him for advice and support?

yeah, he’s def in love

you hear a knock on your door and quickly move to open it, hoping it’s who you think it is.

“hey love,” hajime sighs as you usher him into your home, “i’m so sorry i’ve been so busy lately, with volleyball and all the extra applications to be able to move to the states, it’s been a lot.”

you nod, understanding written on your face. “don’t worry about it babe, i get it! do you need any help with anything?”

he shakes his head, instead choosing to wrap his arms around you, nuzzling his nose in your hair and breathing in your intoxicating scent. “being with you is enough. i really am sorry though, did you need anything?”

you shift slightly, guiding him over to the couch and cuddling up to him there, “all i need is this, hajime.”

he kisses the top of your head and while you both talk about everything and nothing, and it hits him that this is it. you’re it for him - because when he’s with you, he feels like he’s home.

- miya atsumu 

he falls for your unrelenting support

i think we all know that atsumu was left out a lot as a kid & i think that one of his biggest fears is that his loving s/o secretly prefers his brother like everyone else

so he probably tries to scare you off by showing his ugly side first- like constantly arguing with you or canceling dates in favor of an extra hour or two of volleyball practice- and you stay? 

he realizes that no matter what, you won’t leave him

“oi! what are ya still doin’ here, slug?” osamu yells, walking into the gym.

“what do ya think? havin’ a tea party?” atsumu quips back, annoyed that his brother interrupted his practice. 

osamu grabs a ball by his feet and chucks it at his brother. “do ya even know what time it is?” at atsumu’s look of confusion he decides that you’re too good for his idiot brother. “it’s already past 8, you’re late for yer movie date with y/n.”

atsumu’s eyes widen and osamu rolls his eyes at his brother’s frantic form, trying to clean up and get out of there as quickly as he can. “just go, i’ll stay to clean up.” osamu sighs, “but you owe me onigiri for a week!” 

back at your house, you’re sitting on the couch, patiently waiting for your boyfriend- who’s late, again. you jump at the frantic knocks at your front door and you open it to a very sweaty, very disheveled atsumu. 

“shit sorry babe! i left my phone on the bleachers and lost track of time but-” you cut him off with a kiss. his eyes widen before fluttering shut. 

“go shower, tsumu- you stink!” you laugh at his scowl “we can probably still get a couple movies in before my parents get back home.” 

he nods, “i really am sorry babe. i didn’t mean to come late, i just got so caught up in my serves and sets and i-”

“it’s fine love, you have to practice to get better, i understand. i would never tell you to skip out on something so important to you when you make sure to come see me in the end anyway.” you interrupt him, “and besides, i love to brag about how my boyfriend is one of the best setters in the nation” you add with a wink. 

he gives you a peck on the cheek before heading towards your bathroom, thinking about how lucky he is to have you by his side. he decides that this will be the last time he’s late because god forbid he does something to ruin something as precious as this. 

- sakusa kiyoomi

he falls for your respectful and understanding attitude

my poor baby

probably had to deal with getting so much shit for his germophobic preferences 

so when you guys started dating he def asked you to respect his boundaries 

and when you did without questioning him?? or making fun of him?? 

he was shocked because even his own cousin would have something to say about his proclivity for extreme cleanliness

you walk into the huge stadium, eyes searching for a mop of black hair, slightly terrified of getting lost. out of the corner of your eye, you see a flash of neon green & yellow.

“komori!” you yell, hoping he could hear you over the excited chatter all around. you see him whip his head around, trying to find the source of the sound. you yell a couple more times, jumping up and down like a lunatic. he finally spots you and smiles, walking over.

“oh, hey! are you here for kiyoomi?” he asks with a mischievous glint in his eyes, already leading you over to where your boyfriend is, “but i have no clue why you would look for him in the middle of the floor. don’t you know your boyfriend by now?”

you slap him lightly on the arm but excuse yourself when you see your boyfriend hiding in the corner with the most hateful glare on his face. as you walk away and towards him, you notice komori walking over to a tall, dark-haired boy. that must be the setter omi was telling me about, you think. you brush it off, deciding you’d bring it up another time and you tap your boyfriend lightly. the glare he gives you almost makes you want to drop dead right there but you notice how his eyes soften and his overall demeanor brightens.

he pulls you towards him, surprising you and everyone watching, and mumbles into your ear, “i thought you had a tutoring session?”

you pull back slightly and notice how he leans down, practically asking for a kiss. you peck his cheek before giggling, “i wanted it to be a surprise! are you surprised? did you miss me?”

he rolls his eyes before pulling down his mask and kissing you properly. “yes and ... yes” he answers, a light blush apparent on his cheeks.

“awwww! you have a crush on me!!! no, you looove me!! that’s so embarrassing!!” you laugh and he shakes his head but silently agrees because yeah, if the permanent butterflies and erratic heartbeat are any indications, he does love you. and he doesn’t plan on stopping for the rest of your lives.