#guess it's time to try now. maybe.
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hm
#define ''short''#as someone who doesn't read anything over 10k usually. well. uh. um.#i had this one in my marked for later practically since i joined the fandom i don't remember if i ever tried to read it or not 🤔#guess it's time to try now. maybe.
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personal happiness or what the fuck ever
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#jeans here too but ssh#snap sketches#i havent posted anything in what feels like forever and i GUESS i have to remind people i do draw sometimes. whatever.#aka in my brain i have at LEAST a five-page doujin where this gets incredibly nsft but i dont have TIME for that these days do i#so for now we get just. these scribbles. ill be able to make something exemplary again someday i swear <- optimistic#i think im going to close my comms off for the rest of december once i get through the batch i have now#which ... doesnt sound hard since the amount i have will probably take me to the end of december anyway 💀#i just need everyone to believe me i have better visions for yaoifying issue 309 .... the opportunity is right there...#like wdym the dream sequence is gon end on a panel of erik's eyes as he reinforces the idea charles needs happiness like scott and jean's..#call up your ex. right now charles.#what got me peeved about this issue is i have no idea what color eriks outfit could be vjaeLVKEJARK its like.#is he wearing a lab coat over a suit .... i think thats the intention ... or maybe it is a trench coat....#idk shit for me to figure out if i ever get the time to explore this thing again#LIKE UGH IM SCREAMING i have Such Visions that i dont have time to execute and theyre killing me#maybe ill just write them down idfk <- trying to write fanfiction ends even worse for me than trying to draw#anyways. im gonna drive myself mad good night everyone#i have to go to a christmas party tomorrow night. later tonight. whatever.#BYE
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Actually cute. Had to do a quick redraw.
Screenshot is from when Jay lit up the Jack-o'-lantern in the living room.
#I don't suppose they were trying to take a selfie but because front cameras weren't#invented yet they couldn't tell if they were properly within frame or not?#There were also paper plate dolls of them! Which also cute#Sorry for the influx of PR and WS content there are so many good frames to redraw and a couple of ideas to manifest! 😫#Plus. Was rendering a commission the entire day only to scrap all of it because it actually looked better before doing all of that. 😭😭😭#So I had to quickly draw the thing that is egging me to draw at the exact moment just to not feel too bummed about it. 😔#Regular content will resume. Ah. Maybe in the next day? Gonna be another busy day tomorrow.#Man. On top of my usual obsession I got another thing to think about a lot now. (@_@;)#So many MANY things I want to draw so little time. (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥`)#Pumpkin Rabbit#Witch Sheep#The Mysterious House#The Return of The Pumpkin Rabbit#Screenshot redraw#my shiz#skedoobles#The Walten Files#TRoTPR#Walten Files#Lorenzo Waterman#Rachel Waterman#I guess their ship tag will just be 'The Watermans'? ¯\(°_o)/¯#The Watermans
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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the company i work for decided that its switching from the german formal "You"(Sie) to the informal "you" (Du) in all of our websites so now we have to scour the entire database to change it and i quite frankly hate that, not just bc the unecessary extra work but especially bc its such a weird and unecessary change
i bet its bc everything here is getting englishfied (both literally and culturally it feels like, when my new boss talks its half in english bc every second german word is just replaced by an english one despite there being perfectly fine words for it in german too, its so annoying) and bc they want to sound more personal in hopes of getting more clients bc 'company is your fwiend uwu!!', i know this here is the amercian tm site so you wouldnt understand really but i do not want to be greeted with 'du' by companies, no, thats too personal, you dont know me and im not giving you my data, stay away!!
i guess thats how i would describe it .. the formal you is like a polite distance, like someone you dont know staying outside your personal space, but when its the informal 'you' it feels invasive unless i told you you can call me that, and that goes double for companies
maybe its a small thing that doesnt seem important but i cant stand it, im just a little part time worker doing data work so i got no say in it but the companies founder also announced hes giving his post to his kids some time ago so ...... since then theres been alot of changes and new projects that solely aim to imitate whats popular and whats done by other companies, despite ours being one that is, or used to be, intentionally different, like, that was the POINT, but i guess chasing trends is just too appealing for CEOs
#ganondoodles talks#personal#rare personal rant#theres more and more changes that feel so weirdly forced#like man#i thought being different was the whole point#like climate and ethics are .. or were .. the core idea and now i guess its just fine to do whatever conventional companies are doing#yeah woohoo lets also do an app thing that forces people to sign up if they want reasonable prices!#smartphones the standard everwhere!#who needs anything physical if you can put it in an a phone so syphon off data directly out of people fingertips!! yea!!!#lets use AI pitcures bc we refuse to hire more graphic desingers and they are jsut so overworked uwu#climate? ethic? whats that#argh#sorry this needed to get out#recently had a stupid conversation with a coworker bc i asked them why we are okay with AI shit now when it goes against what this-#company was presumably founded on#and he was rly defensive and said welll we dont have time and its cheap and also maybe we should got WITH the time#like that last thing especially pissed me tf off#but i cant afford to lose this job#im starting to hate it more though so the dream of being able to stay like this might not be real#i cant get a job in this place that is as nice to my mental health so idk man#i wish i was good enough at merch and online stuff so i could live of that#but even trying to find out how taxes work on that stuff is a nightmare to me
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everyone is starting to look like a koosh ball out there
#goats#nigerian dwarf#garlic#i will try to take more pics...weather has been bad and i haven't wanted to spend time outside#fair weather goat farmer i guess#anyway. enjoy the pics of the kids while you can because it's getting to winter which means. cull time#hallow's kids are small but we need less mouths to feed right now in general#this size though maybe i'll be able to tan them myself
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Let me assign you an affection language.
A Knife Called Grief You have left your house, you have left those people behind, but what are you going to do about the memories which have taken root in you? You can run but not without them. You want someone to sit with you on this cool marble floor while the sun burns everything.You want them to cut your rotten heart and theirs too. You want to sit with it in front of you, let them see you with all your flaws, which haven’t been your fault but you have been made to believe so, and you want them to love you anyways. Because you know you’d do that for them.
[yoinked from iobartach]
#[inch resting]#ooc#dash game#[reminds me of a post I saw about Miguel's infidelity-- I can't find it anymore but basically it boiled down to#his betrayal of Gabriel and Xina being a sort of betrayal of himself. Now the OP was also trying to make sense of the comic's writing as it#also mischaracterized Xina (per their words)‚ but since Miguel knew Xina since they were young and she protected him from bullies‚ and#Miguel grew up shielding Gabriel from their parents‚ his betrayal and subsequent estrangement from them for someone new‚ someone his brothe#loved‚ and also apparently supported Alchemax whereas Xina was much quicker to criticize it‚ can be seen as Miguel trying to shove down the#vulnerable‚ hurt‚ HUMAN side of himself to make way for the idealized version he tries to protect as a corpo snob.#Which is an interesting viewpoint considering post-forcible-genome-splicing‚ comics!Miguel was also desperate to prove his humanity. He see#himself as an abomination‚ a freak. So how do we reconcile this with movie!Miguel‚ who we admittedly don't know much of his mental state#other than he is basically having The Worst Fucking Day Of His Life Constantly due to grief and leading hundreds of Peter Parkers?#I guess in my own characterization‚ Miguel is trying desperately to shut down that vulnerability‚ BE the inhuman juggernaut‚ the leader‚#but at the same time time‚ esp post-BTSV‚ is so ridden by his mistakes and sins and endless list of shortcomings‚ ALONG WITH the grief for#his daughter that he doesn't seem keen to heal from‚ that he's simultaneously trying to REconnect with that. Figure out what and who he is#outside of work‚ outside of Canon Events‚ outside of everything that Miles took and shook upside down. But that's difficult when#you're so determined to shut that down too‚ huh? Spider-Man can't do both. Not this time. Miguel is going to have to learn one day that he#needs to allow himself to FEEL human instead of constantly shutting it down or drowning it out. Maybe then he'll BE human again too.]#[🍻 if you read this far; I fear this was largely incoherent]
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this isn't intended to be a judgment on anyone in particular, but I'm surprised on how few people in the cccc fandom write image descriptions for their art considering the existence of a character who would realistically need to use them {whether you interpret heart as low vision or light sensitive or fully blind} it's just kind of ironic how the characters in the media couldn't even access the content made for it
anyways, if you have the ability to write image descriptions for your work, I highly recommend doing it! it's pretty easy once you get the hang of it :-)
#maybe it's because i'm used to it in podcast fandoms? it seems more prominent in audio only fandoms like podcasts#which makes it extra weird cccc doesn't have that since it's an album? with visuals in the videos but still#again this isn't a callout or anything i'm moreso musing about like. the culture of fandoms#uhhhh. i guess i'll tag this in the fandom tags#cccc#chonnys charming chaos compendium#chonny jash#ack i hope this doesn't come off judgemental. well it is a little bit because accessibility is important#but it's not. a judgement of character. yknow? i think a lot of people just don't think about it#this is alright to rb by the way i think all fandoms need to have a discussion about accessibility in fan content#if this post inspires anyone to try writing image descriptions for their art i'll be very happy ^-^#i don't need a screenreader myself but i'm light sensitive and can get migraines looking at art sometimes. so the option is nice#ANYWAYS. was thinking about this for a while but was too scared to post it#but i figured now is a good time since people are addressing concerns in the fandom#{which. i'm not touching that one. for personal reasons that i don't want to get into lol}#tridential tirade
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b/a for the boys’ anniversary edit :-)
#b and a#mostly just posting this to say hi#i didn’t mean to disappear again. it’s just#i have had A Week#literally the longest 10 days of my life#but um. it’s fine. i’m hoping things will maybe kind of go back to normal soon ish#i’d like to try & catch up on things & reply to people at some point#i just haven’t had the time nor the energy lately#but n e way….#i’m glad people seemed to like this edit#all the comments & tags on it were so sweet!!#ik i didn’t reply to them but i did read them!!#i had a lot of things i wanted to say about this edit but#i honestly can’t remember any of them now#my brain is just scrambled tbh#so. yea. that’s it i guess. hi.
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zuko: we just need one of those construction trucks. with the thingys to pick stuff up
katara: the forklift ??
zuko: hey i never said i was smart i just know it exists
katara: i never said i was smart either i had to look up the damn name of the vehicle.
katara: i knew ‘lift’ was in there somewhere my remaining 2 brain cells are close to deteriorating
sokka: you two should join forces
zuko: we did. it took both of our brain power to come up with forklift
#source: shit me and my friends have said#guess which one i was 😁😁#zutara#zuko#katara#atla#avatar the last airbender#incorrect zutara quotes#incorrect quotes#anyway it’s been nearly 2 years hello everyone#i hope u missed me#or maybe u didn’t#it’s okay#with the live action atla i figured now would be a great time to revive this account#love yall and free palestine !!!#if u want sources to educate and help palestinians my twitter is @brvcewcynes#all week for the strike but also just in general i try to rt everyday
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Took Kaija to an informal baby nosework class today where she learned how to search for and retrieve a piece of a red deer antler 🦌
#3 years#australian shepherd#dogblr#dog training#nosework#my tentative plan is to get a full roe antler from somewhere (i.e. probably from a hunter) and switch to using that#and maybe actually go out looking for real shed antlers at some point?? i've always wanted to try that.#a couple of things from today:#1) i don't really think this is something kaija has loads of natural talent for 😅#considering that at some points she was walking right past the antler or seemingly relying more on her eyes than her nose#but i guess time will tell maybe we'll figure it out eventually#2) we have a retrieve to hand now :')#i remember i was working on a (more formal) retrieve at some point but then the RO trial season started and that fell to the wayside#her retrieve atm may not be pretty but it works! and i'm happy about it!#3) nosework really tires her out fast. those wheels in her head were TURNING today and she's sooo exhausted now#so if nothing else then at least we have a fun new activity that we can do both indoors and out
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Warrior Nun x Amon Amarth "Vengeance is My Name"
#warrior nun#ava silva#mother superion#areala#you absolutely need to listen to the song to understand the this is my sword part. it goes: THIS! IS! MY! SWORD!#you people with your taylor swift and hozier and ames... meanwhile i think wn is pure metal#(granted maybe not viking metal but this idea has been in my mind forever)#(emylilas suggested i made a video edit but i'm no good at that so gifs it is! thanks for the incentive either way my friend)#anyway. trying something a bit different here clearly#sister makes gifs once in a blue moon#gifs and other visuals#this has been sitting in my drafts for weeks and i guess it's time to release it into the world. be nice now!
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can you remember being born? were you born at all
#my art#kuron vld#vld kuron#vld#this is sorta a companiom piece to the haggar one i posted recently#also. just now realising the perfect timing of posting that drawing on MOTHERS DAY of all possible days#i swear i didnt plan that. didnt even cross ny mind?? but its neat ig#this drawing is pretty simple but i really like how it turned out!!!#it was meant to evoke those infographics of human fetus development#its wrong. there should be middle stages between a fetus and a fully grown adult man. but theres nothing there.#like. he had no childhood or anything. he just woke up as a full ass guy. theres no middle point between a mindless clump of cells and him.#no infant. no child. no teenager. just kuron.#this is wrong and unnatural and it shouldnt have happened but it did#the part of him that looks the most alive is the bloody arm. his life depends on it. hes nothing without it.#sigh. i have so much to say abt this piece and i feel like its pretty barebones and simple tbh#but i still cant put into words what i mean!!!!! i am trying and failing!!! argghhhhhhhhg. whateverr#i have THOUGHTS about this but a weird ramble is all youre gonna get folks. maybe one day il write a small coherent analysis of this thing#he will never escape haggar. he was not meant to. hes asleep and clueless and hell never wake up#he wont ever become more than what was planned for him. and he doesnt even know#blood#gore#i guess. not really gore. more like viscera and flesh?#kuronposting
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i miss carpisuns sometimes </3
#not necessarily that I regret switching over but i just get like nostalgic for an earlier time in the ml fandom#s3 was soooo much fun for me#and the long hiatus before s4 was also the best. so good wasn’t ready for it to end when it did haha#things just feel so different in the fandom now#both the fandom has changed and I have changed#and of course the STORY has changed#and I like don’t know what to do about that or how to react#cause I am used to being one of the guys who is defending ml’s honor with my life lol#committed to spreading positivity#and I still want to be that guy!#but it’s like. idk. I don’t recognize this story anymore#this isn’t the same story that I fell in love with years ago. but I don’t want to just like Leave??#I do want to see how things play out bc I am still invested in these characters#and I would love to still be part of the fan community and connect with people over a mutual love for this thing#that has been important to me for years and has inspired me to create and learn new skills and make new friends!#but I also don’t just want to shut up and pretend I’m happy about things I am decidedly unhappy about lol#like it’s honestly surprising to me that a only a small minority of the fandom seems to feel the way I do?#and the majority are still super pumped and frustrated at the people who are complaining#and really. I don’t WANT to rain on anyone’s parade. I honestly don’t#I was part of the parade for years! I had the best time in the parade! I don’t want to ruin the good time!#so i try not to be too salty on main ? but i feel like I’m going a little crazy lmao! like I’m just one bitter little miser fhdjjd#i mean i guess it’s kind of a good thing that I moved blogs tbh lol#cause now when i whine only a fraction of the people have to be exposed to it 😂#but man i hate knowing that people might think of me as a salter#I mean it’s valid if people are trying to have fun and do not want to hear my complaining haha#but also do i automatically have to be a salter. are the only options support and defend ml 100% at all times or Be A Salter#or can there be a third category of certified ml lover that is just disappointed in recent events & disagrees with the new writing direction#is that too much nuance for tumblr lol#see maybe that’s why I miss carpisuns. she didn’t have to ask this question. she was only full of LOVE!#but therein lies the irony…like marinette I have made this choice out of love…for what the story once was…what is to become of me now…
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More clothing studies, this time from my fic Axis. I was aiming for authenticity while also trying to have each of their personalities show a little bit in their clothing choices. Two for Nicky, to show his layers.
#tog#the old guard#for reference the fic takes place in 1625 in iceland. i still don't think they're bundled enough though lol.#nicolo di genova#yusuf al kaysani#andromache of scythia#no quynh :(#these were a n i g t m a r e to crop correctly. tumblr why are you like this.#hence the cropping might look a little weird#siggy draws#i think these sketches took a month and a half lol. now i will be quiet about this fic and focus on writing something else.#what do we think about this style? the differently coloured lineart and the slight lighting? and the rough colours?#also i forgot my siggynature on ALL of these but that's ok. you know who i am sdfghf#my new obsession is clothing details i guess!! could always make it more detailed though! with lots of practice i can try.#no real director's commentary on these drawings like i usually write for my sketches asdsfgfd#just that this is mostly what they wear in the fic. add a coat for andy maybe and some mitts for joe.#and more weapons and bags and stuff#can't really see nicky's braids but he's got one big french braid and a few tiny ones on the sides of his head connecting to it.#his hair is like shoulder-blade length. it's about the symbolism!! of not making a change for a long time!! until he does cut it!!#and andy is wearing quynh's necklace under her shirt of course </3#joe rolls his pantaloons above the knee for maximum movement (horseriding) and fashion (gay)#i have a crush on the first nicky sketch like he's so cunty for no reason#well. he's possibly supposed to be having a serious conversation/argument with andy#kudos to the ref picture i used of luca just standing Like That
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the problem is I don't know. is it "don't trust your feelings so much" or "You're making a mistake"? is it "if it wouldn't have bothered you before trigger don't let it now" or "seeing things in a different light?" is it OCD or spiritual attack or genuine conviction? is me wearing a FOB hoodie and listening to Fake Out tonight an act of "not giving in to the compulsion" or an act of disobeying and not listening to God?
#I can't help but compare this to the other two times I've had to set something down#once temporarily in middle school and once (maybe) permanently just like a month ago#like. can I excuse all of it? yes. but I do kind of feel separated from God#but idk if that's bc I'm disobeying or bc I shouldn't be trusting my feelings so much. I'm going to just give it time#not in a not listening to the holy spirit way but in a trying to figure things out way#so for right now I guess it will be business as usual but with some added Bible reading. idk. I'm so messed up rn#Lu rambles
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