#guess he had some drunk blood lol

[kowaindar0u]

//

random braindead Yuichi doodles feat Saseki

(and my lost OC & sun shhh I was too lazy to go to a new canvas lol)

[ayyy-pee]

Can I request vampire Nanami surprising reader on a date but she broke up with him because she’s moving overseas to study animals

𝕃𝕆𝕍𝔼 𝔹𝕀𝕋𝔼𝕊

Discord 18+ - Twitter

Pairing: Stalker Vampire Ex-Boyfriend!Nanami Kento x Female Reader

WC: 5.8k

Summary: Did you think he would know how to find you? He's tasted your life essence, been engulfed in your delicious scent, drunk off the taste of you. You could leave if you wanted, he couldn't stop you. But he would find you, he would be watching.

Story Warning: Stalking, Jealousy, Obsession, Biting (duh), Suggestive Things I guess idk lmfao, Blood, Drinking Blood, Spit, Maybe a bit of fingering and who tf knows what else, Kissing with blood, Nanami spit lover?, Nanami Intoxicated on you and your bodily fluids, Exes to Something???, Fingering for sure actually, Kissing with Blood, Profanity bc it's ME, Nanami downbad like SO downbad for reader, he's such a little weirdo

Art by: 𝗣𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗸𝘂ᴬᴿᵀ (@chitrartum) on X

Divider Credit: @jelliedink

A/N: FINALLLLLYYYYYY @lovebittenbyevans it's FINALLY up LOL. Listen, I know I said I would post it yesterday but if yall believed me, that's your fault! I'm a liar! Yall know! LMAO. Anyway, I hope I did this one justice. I haven't written Nanami in so damn long I found myself kinda second guessing myself a lot here, but I'm happy with the final product so I won't complain LOL. Anyway ENJOY!!!

‘There’s something familiar about this scene,’ Nanami thinks as he leans casually against the wall of whatever random building this is. 

There’s something familiar about you. You, and your laugh that causes this strange tingling sensation he hasn’t felt in who knows how long. You, and the way your hand grips onto an arm when you find something particularly amusing. You, and the way you lean a little closer when you’re happy.

‘And you’re so beautiful when you’re happy like this,’ he thinks. Happy, like you clearly weren't with him.

Nanami's eyes narrow, vision honing in on you and the way you laugh and hold onto an arm and lean a little closer because you’re content and enjoying yourself. If only you were laughing with him, gripping onto him, leaning a little closer to him like you used to.

Perhaps then, he wouldn’t be standing across the street with his gaze locked onto your form while you dine out with another gentleman who most certainly isn’t Nanami Kento.

Everything feels so familiar here, like he’s lived this scene before, because he has. But foreign as well, because he’s an outsider now, no longer a part of your world. Not by his choice. Nanami would never choose to be watching the life he once had played out before him. It feels like some sort of sick joke, like he’s being mocked as he’s watching as you do all the things you used to do with him before you’d up and left one morning, knowing it’d be impossible for him to follow you for quite some time. It gave you one hell of a head start, and it took Nanami awhile to find you again. 

But oh, he did find you. And here you are, sitting with another man in the very late hours of the night, at some hole in the wall food stand across the street of a busy intersection. You can’t see Nanami, not from this distance he’s put between you two. But he can absolutely see you, clear as day. Every movement you make, every twitch of muscle, he sees it. 

He can hear you, too– hear your laugh, your heartbeat, your breath, the rush of your blood flowing through your veins. He hears it. Everything.

Nanami watches, his eyes hardening when the man beside you slides his plate over and you take a bite of his meal. That used to be him with you at whatever shit hole you’d chosen for your date.

Nanami had always appreciated that about you. Sure, you enjoyed the occasional fancy night out at Nanami’s insistence – getting dolled up and dining at a Michelin star restaurant. But you much preferred the lowkey vibes of grabbing a bite to eat at a smaller establishment or local street vendor. Even if you knew that wasn’t Nanami’s scene.

“It just brings less attention to you,” you’d reason.

And Nanami isn’t an idiot. He could read between the lines. What you meant was it brings less attention to the fact that he never orders anything to eat, not even a bread roll. The waitresses would give him strange looks, glancing at your table occasionally as he simply watched you consume your meal while the most he could stomach was a glass of water at best.

It really can’t be helped. Human food makes Nanami viscerally ill, after all. If anything, you may have been more concerned that Nanami was eyeing the staff like they were on the menu.

He’d be lying if he said the sight of you sharing another man didn’t upset him. Not only did you give another man the place beside you that was once his own, you’ve welcomed him into your routine. Welcomed him to the smiles that were once meant for only his eyes. Welcomed him to the laughs that Nanami can hear even above the noise of this late night traffic across the road.

Simply put, you seem to have replaced him. You’ve moved on, tossed him aside for another. And it’s more than Nanami can say for himself.

It’s been months since you ended your relationship, and he just can’t seem to let you go. He knows he should. He knows that he shouldn’t be watching you the way he does. He can’t help it. Besides, it’s not as if you know what he’s doing. He usually keeps his observing to a healthy distance, only to ensure you’ve made it home safely. That you’re tucked into your bed and definitely not out on dates with new men.

Not too far, but not too close either. It’s become a habit for him. He works from home until the late morning, then he sleeps, because what else is he to do? He wakes up once the stars are visible in the sky, then heads straight to your home. And on days he’s not able to get to you because he’s busy…having dinner (sometimes it’s for business reasons!)…he just hopes you’re doing what you usually do on a lazy night; sitting in your pajamas and curled under the soft blankets he’d purchased for you early on in your relationship.

He likes to think you’d kept something that reminded you of him. Do you think of him? Because he thinks of you. Always. If his standing here staring at the back of your head like a madman isn’t any indication. He keeps all your little trinkets, too. Anything you’d left behind, he has. 

He’s lived a long life, human emotion having long been cast aside, and your presence awoke something in him. At the time, he couldn’t quite place this feeling and didn't bother digging any deeper for answers. But it’s your absence that provides the knowledge he never sought out. It reminds him that he was once human. That he was once capable of feeling more than insatiable hunger, the need to feed off another.

He’s capable of desire, of love. Nanami doesn’t think he’ll ever feel the way he does about you for anyone else.

Unfortunately for him, that doesn’t seem to be the case for you, as you appear to have finally started seeing someone new. But unfortunately, you’ve made the grave mistake of opting for what appears to be a date that falls within Nanami’s most active hours.

He’s used to the shadows, as it feels most like himself to hide under the cover of darkness. It’s how he was able to find you, able to sense that you’re even breathing and content sighs when you slept were noticeably absent when he’d found himself doing his nightly “check in” on you.

So he does what any concerned ex-boyfriend would do. He follows the sound of your heartbeat. All the way here, where you’re having far too much fun for his liking.

Brown eyes stare as you and your date finally wrap up dinner. Your date helps you from your stool, and you idly chat before he wraps you in a tight hug and Nanami feels his blood boil. Well, if he had a beating heart, he imagines his blood would be boiling. 

How dare this man put his hands on you so affectionately? And how dare you receive it so happily? Did all your time together – the kisses, the moans, the love you shared – mean nothing to you?

Fuck this. He’s going over there. 

But the moment your date leaves you and you turn to head the opposite direction, Nanami is torn. Should he follow you? Or should he follow your date? On the one hand, he wants to see what you’re up to, if you’re going home and if not, who and where are you going to? On the other, he’d love to sink his teeth into your date's jugular and rip his larynx out. So many tempting choices…but he opts for the former.

He’s on your tail quickly. He’s determined to speak to you, has to see you and confirm that you’re done with him for good. His body moves fast, hurrying through the crowd to try and catch up to you before you can slip through his grasp again. He won’t accept this. He’s given you ample time to come back. He won’t wait a moment longer.

When the crowd thickens in the busier part of the city, it becomes harder for Nanami to see you. The sounds of different heartbeats blend with your own and your scent becomes more difficult to track when you mix in the shitty perfumes and cheap colognes. Before long, he's lost you. 

His eyes dart around, quickly and thoroughly scanning every face and body in the crowd. But none of them are you. He's certain of that. Deep breaths, Nanami takes several of them focusing on the familiar rhythmic beat of your heart. The pedestrians move around him as he stands still, eyes closed as he focuses. They mutter their curse words or pardon themselves, but he can’t be bothered to listen to anything but you. 

At least a minute passes before he hears it. It's faint at first, but it's there. The light thumping of your heart. He follows it, all the way into a dark alley. And then the panic sets in. 

Why would you be here of all places?

Why is your heartbeat so quiet?

Are you in trouble?

“What the hell are you doing, Kento?” Your harsh voice has Nanami spinning on his heel, the tone unfamiliar to him. 

There you are, in all your glory. Beautiful as he remembers, though it’s not as if he hasn’t seen you recently. He just hasn’t seen you this close in awhile. The neon signs of the city cast a cute glow along your skin and Nanami has to resist smiling. Because you're also so very pissed, arms folded across your chest and a deep frown sitting on your lips. And yet, you still manage to mesmerize him.

“I was just out–” he begins coolly, but you cut him off.

“Out…Out what exactly?” You ask. “Out…following me?”

He should lie. 

He should tell you that he would absolutely never do something as outlandish as following your scent like some cartoon hound dog floating through the air as they chase the smell of food. But that may be hard to believe seeing as that’s how you two started out in the first place – with Nanami searching for his next meal (you) and you somehow charming him into taking you out to dinner instead. What a twist.

Weeks later, he would reveal himself to you as the blood hungry creature of the night he is. And you’d accept him for exactly who he was.

And still, he should lie. 

So that at least you feel a little better. Maybe you’ll think this is just some coincidence that he’s run into you in this dank alleyway in the middle of the night, but he doesn’t bother. You know him. And well, at that. 

So he tells the truth. All of it. 

Your laugh is dry, fingers pinching the bridge of your nose as you try to keep your composure. No one is around, save for the people passing by on the sidewalk, not sparing a single glance into the shadows where you hide with your ex-boyfriend. Still, you don’t want to draw any attention to the two of you. Less for either of your sake, and more for the poor person who deigns to interrupt.

“So you’ve been following me…”

Nanami wouldn’t exactly put it that way, but…

“Yes.” 

Okay, maybe he would.

He never was one to mince words.

“How long?”

He tilts his head in question.

“How long…” you pause briefly, seemingly gathering your thoughts. “Have you been watching me? Following me? Whatever the hell it is you’re doing?”

Nanami thinks about this, though he knows the answer. It’s been exactly four months and six days, about eighteen and a half weeks, one hundred and twenty nine days total since you left and he picked up this…obsession with you. But who’s keeping track?

“Since you left,” he answers with the truth once again. Even in this darkness, he can see your eyes widen in shock. He doesn’t want to scare you. He wants you to see how much he wants you, needs you even.

“Because you left me without a single word, ___” he tries to explain. “Won’t answer my calls, won’t reply to my text messages, won’t see me –”

Nanami steps closer to you, and you step back, and it causes this strange stinging sensation in his chest that sort of…hurts? Makes him want to beg you not to move any further, because he’s not sure he can withstand it now that he’s within reach of you again.

“Well apparently, you see me all the time!” You grit out, voice rising an octave before you catch yourself.

“I’m only making sure you’re safe,” he tries to reason, but you shake your head.

“No…” You hold up a finger between you both, keeping Nanami at a distance. And that sting settles in again. “No, you’re stalking me, Kento.”

“Yes, but you’re dating. I saw you.”

“And? I’m allowed to go out with people, Kento!”

It’s been so long since Nanami has heard you say his name. And you’ve said it three times in such a short span. It’s doing something to him that he can’t quite put into words.

“And how do you know they’re a good person? How do you know they won’t hurt you? I’m simply looking out for you.”

You rub aggressively at your temples. “Kento…” you sigh. “You…are…a…fucking…vampire.”

Nanami rolls his eyes.

“And a shitty one at that. But I dated you, and I was just fine,” You’re sure to add. “For a vampire, you’re really not as stealthy as you think you are, by the way.”

You’re right. Perhaps he’s been sloppy, following you the moment nightfall comes, tracking your whereabouts. He thought you hadn’t noticed, but has he really made it so obvious?

There’s a short bout of silence between you, you glaring hard at him while he tries to think of a way to make you see reason. But you look away, just as you ask, “Are you hunting me now?”

Your sudden question surprises Nanami, his brows rising when he hears the fear seep into your quiet voice.

He steps forward again, and this time he breathes a sigh of relief when you don’t move. “No, of course not.” His hands cup your face, tilting your head upward so you can see the honesty in his eyes. You let him hold you as he speaks. “I would never hunt you…” Your eyes narrow, and Nanami quickly adds, “...again.” 

He sees the way your lips purse together, like you’re trying not to find humor in that. “If anything, I was hunting your date…” he mutters, quickly tacking on “kidding,” when you narrow your eyes again.

But still, he makes a mental note to find that man later.

“The first time,” Nanami says honestly, “I hunted you with the intention to kill. Clearly, things didn’t work out that way.”

You sigh, your features softening as Nanami pours his heart out to you, the way he wishes you would’ve let him before you left. “No…they didn’t.”

He remembers the first time he’d caught your scent, so alluring and delicious, the first time he’d heard your heartbeat, and he’d let the sound lull him to sleep, the first time he’d pressed his tongue to your pulsepoint, the thrumming beneath making his nostrils flare. And then, the first time you’d let him taste your life essence…

“You changed me, ___,” he whispers. “I’m a monster, it’s true. I kill, I manipulate others to get what I want, I hurt others. But I’ve never done any of these things to you.”

Your hands find his wrists, holding tight while he finally blurts out everything he’s been keeping buried all these months.

“You leaving me…it left a hole in my life I didn’t know you filled at the time. I need you. I love you,” he says. “It’s why I watch you, why I follow you. I’m sure I sound a little insane…”

“An understatement,” you murmur. But there’s a tiny smirk playing at your lips. You’re teasing him.

“I have not felt this much emotion towards another since…” He shakes his head, almost in disbelief. “I don’t even know when. But I know for certain, I feel love when I think about you. I thought you felt the same…” He breathes hard, like it was such a strenuous task to get all of that off his chest. Eyes boring into yours, he mutters quietly, rather pathetically, he thinks, “...what changed for you? Why don’t you want me anymore?”

Any other vampire would be mocking Nanami to all hell, dragging his name through the mud at how desperate he is for you, a human. He loves you. There is no doubt there. Why else would he spend any and all of his free hours thinking of you, dreaming of you, seeing you anytime he closes his eyes? You consume him, and the irony is not lost upon him. 

It’s been so long since Nanami stepped outside in the daylight. So long since he’s felt the sun on his skin. But your warmth, your presence…you are his sun. He orbits around you. 

It can’t be helped. He knows what he wants, knows what he’d do to have you back. He just needs to know that you want him, too.

Your soft breaths against his face has his mind reeling. Your scent is driving him crazy. He doesn’t even know when you two had gotten so close.

“It didn’t change…” You confess, and if Nanami didn’t have incredible hearing, he would have missed it. Your feelings for him haven’t changed. “I’m leaving Tokyo, Kento…”

Nanami thinks he misheard you.

“I’m sorry?”

You repeat it, a little louder this time, albeit shakily. “I’m leaving. Going abroad for school.” You smile softly, and Nanami finds his thumbs gently caressing the apples of your cheeks. “I got into a program to study wildlife and…I’m going to go.”

Now Nanami wishes he had misheard you.

“You…left me…to go and study animals?” He’s not understanding. You can’t do that here?

“No. I left because I need this change, Kento.”

“Why?” The question comes out more strained, more desperate than he intended. “Why do you need to leave me to do this? Why do you need to see other people to do this?”

You can’t look at him now, eyes downcast. “I’m still young, Ken. I have to figure out my life.”

“And you can’t do that with me?”

This is all too much. Why the hell does studying animals mean you have to leave him? That you see other people romantically? That you give yourself to another? Perhaps he should just kill you. It feels like a better solution than letting you leave him for good.

“It’s only for a few years,” you reassure him. “I just…it was easier for me to cut and run. You can’t go with me. The trip is long and…the sun…you just–”

He gets it now. A lengthy flight abroad is impossible for someone like him. Of course you’d want a real life, a mortal life without him. He would be selfish to keep you from that. And he is selfish. He wants you, deserves you. After years of living in the shadows, he wants so badly to step into the light with you.

But he knows that he can’t. He knows he can only give you what you truly deserve – freedom.

“You’ll be great,” Nanami says, trying to control the way his voice threatens to break. “And when you’re done…if you still want me, come back to me, okay?”

You nod, tears pooling at your waterline as you make your silent promise clear.

There are no more words to be said. It’s the closure he needed, though not the results he wanted. He has to let you go. It’s not fair. That’s what he wants to say. He wants to grab you and take you back to his home and keep you locked up so that you can never leave him. Maybe turn you so that you can spend an eternity together. But it’s just not fair.

He feels your hands press against his chest, trembling as you stare up at him. “One more time before I go?”

It’s an offer he can’t, and won’t refuse.

Nanami kisses you, hard and long, hungrily. He slips his tongue into the cavern of your mouth, humming when your tongue tangles with his, and he’s already losing himself in you. In your touch, the little sounds you make, your scent, your taste.

God, how he missed you. How he will keep missing you when you’re gone and even until the day you return.

Your lips slot against his, messy and demanding, hands balling his shirt in your fists as you pull him closer. You step back, dragging Nanami with you, each step moving you further and further until your back hits the wall and Nanami’s towering over you. And he’s losing himself, humming when you sigh into his mouth, hands finding your waist and squeezing out of fear you’ll vanish into thin air if he lets you go, his head tilting just slightly so that he can take up more of your space, more of your air. He’s so lost in you that he barely feels the change, hardly makes out the little yelp you let out, your hands pushing him away as you roughly break free of the kiss. 

Eyes wide, your fingertips graze your bottom lip where a cut now resides, thick crimson blood dripping into your hand. “Your fangs…” you’re panting harshly. “They’re out.”

Nanami’s fingers are on his mouth, a single digit running through his lips, along his teeth where he feels the long, sharp canines fully protruding. He’s nicked you. He lost himself so much so he sliced your lip with his fang.

‘This is fucking embarrassing,’ he thinks. The urge to vanish into the shadows and forget about this encounter is strong.

This. This is the effect you have on Nanami. Any and all control he has is out the window. His fangs appearing on their own? It’s the equivalent of suddenly getting an erection while out in public. This has never happened to him before. Not with any of his past lovers. Not even when he’d first turned. And yet, you pull this reaction from him so easily. 

Nanami is overtly aware of humans and their mortality, of course. So he doesn’t particularly go out of his way to care for them. But you…he cares for you. You have him skulking around like a rat in the dark, waiting for you to look his way. You have him losing control of his fangs like he’s some goddamn adolescent vampire just from the taste of your saliva.

It’s definitely not the liquid he’d prefer, but he loves it all the same. Intoxicatingly saccharine, so sweet it almost hurts.

“I’m so sorry,” Nanami whispers, taking your hand from your lips. “I lost control.” He lifts your hand to his face, eyes boring into yours as he inhales the enticing scent of your blood. One long breath, deep, savoring the smell. “That seems to happen a lot when it comes to you.” His tongue darts out, his gaze locked on the way your breath hitches, how your heart beats loud like a drum as he slowly drags the warm and wet muscle along your skin.

‘Delicious,’ his mind sings. Nanami’s body reacts as it always does when he even catches the scent of your blood. He leans forward until he’s only an inch away before he drags his tongue along the swelling cut on your lip, humming gruffly at the taste. He’d missed you, and your blood. It’s unlike any others. 

You watch him through hooded eyes, chest rising and falling rapidly. The sounds of the bustling city just down this alleyway drown out as the two of you simply stare at each other, neither daring to look away. You may not be able to see as well as Nanami can in this darkness, but he sees you, and he’s sure he wears the exact same expression as well – love, desire, need. He sees the way you hold all of it in your eyes. You do care for him, you do love him the same way he loves you. You want him the way he wants you. He sees it so clearly.

He kisses your lips tenderly, careful not to hurt you again. Slow, steady, a bit more controlled than before. He’s trying to reign it in. But it’s you who deepens the kiss, arms wrapping around his neck and pulling Nanami closer as you kiss him harder. Your tongue finds its way into his mouth, and Nanami groans, the metallic blend of your blood and saliva sweet on his tongue.

“Fuck,” he breathes.He lips are on yours, rougher this time, the cut on your lip opening again and bleeding, mixing into both of your mouths. “Did you always taste this good?” 

You giggle in response, a sound he missed dearly. 

“I’m serious,” Nanami pants. “I feel like I can’t think straight just from kissing you.” He grinds his hips into yours, evidence of his need rubbing against your center. “Do you have any idea how badly I’ve wanted this again? How badly I’ve wanted to see you, to hold you, to touch you, to t–?”

He catches himself, not wanting to beat a dead horse.

“Taste me?” You whisper, fill in the gap, humor in your tone. 

Well, it does come with the territory, he supposes.

“That, too.”

Your fingers play with the short blonde locks sitting at the nape of Nanami’s neck, staring up at him and it reminds him of the domesticity you used to have. Reminds him of those little moments in between the busyness of your lives. “I have some idea,” you sigh as Nanami dips his head down to kiss along your jawline, down your neck. “You did stalk me for months, after all.”

He hums against your skin, acknowledging the fact. His lips drag along as he finds the spot that calls to him, and when he presses a light peck to the place where he can see your pulse fluttering, you gasp, fingers tightening in his hair. This was always the part you sort of dreaded, he recalls. And it was also the part you both were most excited for.

“Can I?” Nanami pleads, rubbing his nose along your pulsepoint and inhaling deeply. Your scent has changed, the anticipation and little bit of fear in your blood evident to him. So he presses another kiss, sweet and soothing to your neck again in hopes to calm you. He hopes the answer is a resounding yes, that you’ll let him do this one last time before you leave him for who knows how long.

He’s certain he’ll die right in this spot if you say no.

But your hand glides along his arm, until your fingers wrap around his. You guide his hand to the waistband of your pants, his fingers just barely beneath the fabric, and Nanami groans eagerly.

“Have me,” you whisper, whimpering quietly when Nanami runs his tongue along that spot. “I want you to.”

Nanami’s nostrils flare, the rapid rhythm of your pulse pounding beneath his tongue sending him into overdrive. If he’s being honest, this is his favorite part. Perhaps he gets off on the small bit of fear you exude just before this. He can’t help it. It’s instinct for him.

His hand slips between your bodies, into your pants as you loop your both arms around his neck. The feeling of your dripping core makes his cock throb within the confine of his own pants. But he can take care of that later. Right now, he only sees (and hears, and smells) you. He inhales deeply once more, kissing along your jaw once more until he reaches your lips. His lips slot against yours, needy and hungry until he has to force himself to break away in case he loses control again. He’s back at the juncture between your neck and your shoulder, right where your pulse beats wildly beneath your skin.

“It may hurt,” he warns, but it’s only to make himself feel better, really. You’re aware of the pain, having experienced it many times before. And still, even with the bit of pleasure it gives him, Nanami feels a little guilty about it.

“It’s okay. I can take it,” you assure him softly.

Of course you can, his sweet love. You would let Nanami do this time and time again if he asked, would you? And this is what Nanami remembers. How pliant you become when he’s got you like this. So eager to give him whatever he asks for. 

How will he live without you?

Nanami groans, low and rough against your neck, murmuring about how much he’ll miss you, how he loves you, how you’re so perfect for him and he’d rather die than to have another take your spot in his world. All the romantic words he’s been hoping to say fall from his lips, and he can hear from the way your heart drums against your ribcage that you’re feeling the effects of his words. He means every one of them, he hopes you know. 

His lips brush against your skin, presses one last, sweet kiss to the spot, murmuring, “I love you,” while his fingers run through your slick folds. Your legs tremble as Nanami’s rough fingers rub tight and slow circles on your clit. Your hands have found his shoulders, bunching the fabric of his shirt as you hang on. Every curse and moan from your lips is music to Nanami’s ears, only making him harder, more desperate to hear you make more of those noises.

He keeps his ministrations going, slipping forward until he has a single finger positioned at your entrance. He pushes in gently, just barely enough to garner a reaction, but your mouth still falls open with a soft gasp.

“So tight, so sensitive still,” he speaks, muffled against your neck.

Nanami’s tongue runs along your pulse, mouth opening slightly so that his lips lift and pull back. His canines push forward from his gums, exposing the long set of sharp fangs that have been screaming to be let loose. The relief he feels at finally being able to freely expose the long canines has Nanami letting out a strangled groan, murmuring an “I love you” just one more time before he’s slowly sinking his fangs into you at the exact moment he adds a finger to your entrance, pushing in and stretching your walls. His eyes roll to the back of head immediately, the thick and warm liquid filling his mouth, and he consumes everything you’re willing to offer.

It’s no wonder Nanami felt the need to follow you from the moment you’d left him. There is something completely addicting about you, something that doesn’t simply satisfy his hunger and cravings, but so much more. 

Your teeth bite down on your lip, an attempt to not scream at the sharp pain. Your hands squeeze hard, the discomfort running through your entire body. And Nanami squeezes you, too, one hand holding onto your waist for dear life, for something that will tether him to this moment here and now with you. Because he doesn’t want to lose control, doesn’t want to hurt you any more than he already is. 

Your eyes are closed tight, mind reeling with the intense pain and ecstasy you’re feeling while Nanami drains you, simultaneously pumping his fingers into you, and you quickly find yourself overcome with pleasure. Your quiet gasps and moans of pain turn to quiet gasps and moans of bliss, and the iron grip you had on Nanami eases.

He drinks from you like he hasn’t fed in days, and it has your head spinning, the quick depletion of your blood making your legs shake. It doesn’t help that Nanami’s fingers are picking up speed, reaching the place that makes you whine and beg for more, the lewd sound of your wetness mixed with both your muffled moans filling the space of this disgusting alley. 

You haven’t fucked anyone since you left him all those months ago, and now you’re remembering why.

There’s not much Nanami needs to do to quickly have you unraveling beneath him. Be it his mouth, his hands, his cock, he knows exactly what to do to make you come undone. You’re not shocked at all when Nanami presses his thumb to your clit, rubbing delicious circles on it, and your walls squeeze down on his thick fingers just as he bites down on your neck a little harder. Then he messily breaks his hold on you with a sharp intake of breath, standing tall and looming over your form so he can have a front row seat to your orgasm crashing over you suddenly.

Your lips fall open, a loud cry threatening to burst from your chest. But Nanami’s lips find yours, silencing you when his tongue immediately enters your mouth so that you can taste yourself on him. You moan, the taste of metallic heavy between you as you ride out your high on Nanami’s thick fingers.

You’re like this for a while, kissing lazily as Nanami pumps into you. When you’ve finally come down from your high, Nanami slips out of you easily, not wasting any time before he’s putting his fingers in his mouth and sucking them clean. You can just make out the dried blood staining around his mouth and his chin, and you wonder if you share a similar look.

It’s strange to taste your own blood, you’ve always thought so, but it’s not bad. Not when it’s Nanami you’re sharing it with. Not when it’s with someone you love.

You gaze up at the man you feel you can’t live without, but know you must in order to truly find yourself, your happiness, and your heart races. How could you have ever thought you’d be able to live a normal life after leaving him? How could you have given up this love you strongly share? Could you truly leave him here alone for the next few years? 

You don’t have the answers, but you know you can’t go back on what you’ve planned for your future. You need this, and he knows it. But it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy this bit of time you have together. You were stupid to think you could cut and run. You don’t want to be away from him.

“Can we take this back to your place?” You whisper, pulling Nanami down for another kiss, softer this time, teasing almost. You press a palm to his groin where you feel his desire for you, and Nanami grunts at your touch. “I want to spend every second with you before I go.”

[irisintheafterglow]

every love I've known in comparison is a failure

summary: the stars appear over baratie, creating the perfect atmosphere to embarrass your husband. (opla!zoro x you)

wc: 2k

cw/tags: established relationship, swearing, allusions to canon-typical blood and violence, drinking and alcohol, flashback to a very silly meet ugly lol

note: (part one is linked here!) HELLO ZORO NATION, here is the highly requested part 2 to "if he's a ghost then i can be a phantom." hope you like it, i definitely had fun writing it because he's just,,,, such a himbo man. @alphaash99 thank you for the inbox ask, sorry it took so long to answer!!

likes, reblogs, and replies are appreciated!

“I don’t know what else to tell you; that’s really all there is to it,” you laugh, taking another sip from your glass. “He brings me heads and I give him money.” 

“Brought you heads,” your husband corrects from your side, his arm draped securely over your shoulders. “Right now, I’m the one with a fire under my ass.” 

“Mhmm, but apparently I’m still giving you money,” you remind him, nodding toward the overflowing coin pouch of Berry at the center of the table. He shrugs a broad shoulder in defeat, unsuccessfully trying to hide his smile. 

“Okay, but you’re leaving out the part where you somehow fell in love with this…oaf.” Nami gestures vaguely at the crew’s swordsman and his jaw drops in indignation. Luffy and Usopp break into another fit of delirious giggling while Sanji leaves to fetch yet another bottle. Everyone present knew his ego was bruised from his failed attempts to charm you. “I think he has less romantic appeal than an overripe banana.”

“At this point, just say that I’m ugly,” he chuckles lightheartedly and she shakes her head in exasperation. “I’m obviously not that bad since this is who I married.” The two remaining boys at the table give polite applause, to which Zoro murmurs his melodramatic appreciation like he was accepting an award. You couldn’t remember the last time he was this relaxed while he was drinking. Most of the time, you had to steer him to whatever ship he was calling home for the night while simultaneously preventing him from stabbing anything that moved. 

“Yeah, keep telling yourself that,” Nami snorts and Zoro makes a mocking face that you raise your hand up to cover. “But, seriously. How’d he get you?” You pause, searching for words in your foggy mind and getting distracted by the speckling of midnight stars up above. Following the disastrous first meeting with the crew’s chef, their swordsman reluctantly introduced you to the rest of his new friends. You spent the remainder of the evening sipping a fruity drink with your legs crossed over your husband’s lap and regaling the table with embarrassing stories about their favorite stoic crewmate. 

“In all honesty, our first meeting was a fluke,” you admit after some time. Sanji returns with a new bottle and pours himself a hefty glass before sliding it to the center of the group, settling in to listen to your story. “I was there by mistake; he was there by mistake. I guess the two canceled out.” 

Years ago, when you were still confined to the walls of the Marine base, a series of unexpected changes in your itinerary allowed you an afternoon of freedom. You were visiting from your father’s countryside estate to once again ask if you could sail on one of his ships, only to receive the same dismissive answer as every request before. As if to rub more salt in the wound, he also notified you that Mihawk would be docking in two days time to continue your training. After jumping the gun a little too early and skipping the flattery dinner to get him drunk enough to grant your request, you were left with an extra day to wander the dry, lifeless walls of the installation. With a leg propped up on your father’s expensive leather chair and the other resting on the windowsill facing the ocean, you don’t bother turning when the door opens and the sound of boots echoes through the office. 

“Get out and I won’t tell the captain you came in here,” you say boredly, staring at the vast blue water that seemed to spell out freedom in the seafoam. The voice that replies is too disrespectful to ever come from the mouth of one of your father’s underlings. 

“I wasn’t aware the captain wore such promiscuous clothing.” You startle, swiveling abruptly to face the stranger that entered the room. He wasn’t a Marine at all, you quickly realized, not with that bright green hair and enough wrinkles in his clothes to look like your great grandfather’s forehead. But, what gave him away the most was his eyes. They weren’t like the eyes of other men you looked at, the ones who would cower or rake over you like you were some entree at a feast. No, this stranger looked at you curiously and with amusement that irked you. 

He looked at you like you were a new challenge. 

“Who are you?”

“Roronoa Zoro, the Pirate Hunter,” he replies and your eyes flick to his sharp jawline. If he weren’t in the room, you would have slapped yourself to regain your composure. “I have a bounty I’d like to turn in.” He tosses a burlap sack dripping with dark liquid onto your father’s equally expensive desk and you don’t even flinch. Your lack of a reaction seems to spur him further and he tilts his head to the side, studying you. 

“What’d my old man promise you?” 

“The captain is your father?” His eyes narrow on you and you glare, not backing down. 

“Answer my question first,” you fire back without hesitation. 

“Five hundred thousand Berry,” he answers and you nod, reaching over to one of the intricately carved drawers and pulling out a stack of bills and a dense pouch of coins. Rolling the bills into a wad and stuffing it into the coin purse, he catches it with ease when you toss it to him. “You’re not gonna verify if I’m giving you the right number?”

“That would imply that I care about how much you’re taking from my father,” you point out, “Which, I really don’t. I couldn’t care less, frankly, if you ransacked this entire office. Just don’t get caught or both our asses will have a fire under them.” He hums in assent and turns to leave, but as his hand hovers over the door handle, he hesitates and looks at you over his shoulder. 

“What are you doing here by yourself?”

“Trying to figure out how to sneak out of this fucking hellhole,” you mutter with obvious distaste. A thoughtful look crosses his features and he chucks you a crumpled cloak from a nearby dressing table. “What are you–”

“Put it on. Let’s get out of here,” he states and you hastily throw it over your clothes, slipping behind the swordsman while he guides you out of the base. He knows his way around the tunnels and, with the cloak obscuring your identity, successfully sneaks you out of the dusty beige walls of the base. The smell of garlic and fried food wafts into your nostrils and you drift toward it, feeling in your pocket for your own small coin pouch. Zoro falls into step next to you effortlessly and follows you to the enticing grill. “Someone’s hungry.”

“I’ve been eating nothing but government slop for the past twenty four hours. If I have to see another spoonful hit my plate, I’ll actually die,” you deadpan and the corner of his mouth turns up in amusement. Without bothering to count the amount, you drop a handful of coins into the vendor’s roughened palms and ask for enough food to feed you and the man next to you. She gladly obliges, stacking various grilled sticks of food onto a plate and thanking you profusely for your generosity. “We’re gonna eat and you’re going to explain to me why you snuck me out,” you command and you’re glad to sense him continue to stay by your side. 

During the few hours you spend with Zoro, you find yourself utterly enthralled by him and he is fascinated by you. You listen to his stories about hunts and his bounties and find yourself in awe of how non-arrogantly he speaks of his job. You’d sat down for numerous fancy dinners with egotistical Marines that wanted to sleep their way into good graces with your father, but eating with Zoro was nothing like that. He was an amazing listener and, when you thought he was just ignoring something you said, he ended up saying something just as thoughtful a few moments later. His visits became more frequent and you continued to find excuses to linger around the base in hopes that he would sneak you out again. Your father’s rage would end both of you if he ever found out, but the thrill of secrecy was your newest addiction. 

“He asked to marry me a few years after I helped him empty my dad’s wallet,” you recall, fondly remembering the disaster that was his proposal. “He had this whole shabang planned out with a sunset and fancy cheeses–”

“And then it fucking rained,” he grumbles before taking another sip. “Fucking storm rolled in and blew away the entire setup.” 

“That’s still romantic, though,” Luffy offers reassuringly. “Getting down on one knee in the rain.”

“It is,” you smirk, “if he didn’t drop the ring off the cliffside.” The crew erupts into shocked cackling, tears pricking the edges of their eyes. 

“You dropped the fucking ring?” 

“The wind was strong!” 

“Wait, so then how’d you get that one?” Usopp points at the green gem embedded in the simple gold band. It was strikingly similar to the one hanging from a chain around your husband’s neck, a decision made so he didn’t lose it while he was fighting. 

“He went out and bought one from the market the next day. It was, what, fifty Berry?”

“You bought them a cheap ass ring after you dropped the expensive one,” Nami echoes in disbelief. Zoro opens his mouth to argue but is cut off with even louder shrieks from the table. “How the hell did you pull them?”

“It’s something I ask myself every time I see this ring,” he concedes. “But one thing I do know is that they deserve more than I can ever give them.” The soft look on his face when he turns to you never fails to make your body feel like it’s floating. It’s only when Luffy slams his palms on the table decisively that you snap out of your lovesick trance.

“Alright, that settles it,” he states with finality. 

“Settles what?”

“You’re going to join our crew.” Usopp raises his glass like he’d seen the order coming from miles away. Sanji turns a slightly darker shade of pink but doesn’t protest. 

“I could use someone that isn’t oozing with testosterone on the ship,” Nami adds when you’re unable to respond immediately. You can feel Zoro’s body tense next to you and, when you place a comforting hand on his shoulder, it feels like pure stone. He knew firsthand that asking you to leave was a touchy subject, especially when it was hard for the child of a captain to disappear into the blue. If you were out there with him, he told you, he wouldn’t be able to assure your safety when he was on hunts. Though you both knew you could handle yourself just fine, it always seemed to be a matter of poor timing when it came to running away together. Poor timing, that is, until now. 

Zoro wasn’t alone now, and you don’t even hesitate. 

“Do I get to choose a cool signature weapon like everyone else?” The captain’s face breaks into a blinding grin and begins a long ramble of different weapons you could choose from. Your husband’s body hasn’t lost its stiffness and he lowers his voice to a tone that only you could hear. 

“Are you sure about this?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” His eyebrows furrow, unconvinced. “I said I’d do anything to be with you, didn’t I?”

“But piracy, love? You’re willing to go that far for me?”

“You know I’d go even farther if I needed to,” you murmur and that settles it. You catch an excited glint in Zoro’s eye and lean in closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder. “You’re not the only swordsman on the ship anymore, husband.”

“And I’ve finally gotten you out of that damned base, so I think it’s a good time to renew those vows.”

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[deansapplepie]

In your Dreams

Summary: After an almost fatal incident your friends can’t do anything but request the “person” you mostly despised to save your life. You just didn’t expected ending up in this situation.

Pairing: f!reader x Vampire! Daryl

Warnings: oral (female), bitting, thigh bitting, femoral artery, mentions of accidents, smut, blood drinking, blood, enemies to vampire bonded thang (?), swearing. 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

A/N: This Vamp! Daryl is in the universe of True Blood, so it means vamp blood cure and all the other rules from this universe applies here. Not saying much more or I’ll give away the plot lol

Also, Daryl got a little half-bro here. Jason Stackhouse-Dixon, cause yes in my mind Jason looks a lot like young Daryl, bye!

The pleasurable sensation irradiated from your heat throughout your whole body, your hand firmly grasping his brown locks while he worked his tongue and fingers in your cunt. The sounds and profanities that left your mouth were sinful and unspeakable. Soon you felt a sharp pain in your thigh, right at your femoral artery and you could feel your blood flowing directly into his mouth.

Anyone would guess it hurt and that the moment was ruined, but it wasn’t. You didn’t know if it could get any more pleasurable, but it did. Out of your mind you pressured your thigh against his mouth, if it depended of only that moment he could suck you dry and you wouldn’t mind. The pace his fingers still worked coming in and out of you, his thumb pressing your clit, oh, so precisely and his mouth sucking and licking you. Your body shaked, you whimpered and screamed while your walls contracted his fingers, and you saw nothing but pleasure.

Until he raised from between your thighs and you could see his handsome bloody face. Daryl Dixon.

You woke up startled. What the freaking fuckering was that? How could you have erotic dreams with HIM? From all the people in the world, him???? You wouldn’t mind having the hottest of the dreams with some of the ‘finest’ gentlemen from the town, but Daryl Dixon was everything but a gentleman. You prayed you hadn’t moaned or anything during sleep, cause you knew he would be able to hear if you did, you were in the same house afterwards.

You looked for your bedside watch and it was already night, you had slept the whole day. Shit. It was expected, you had lost so much blood after being attacked, drinking his blood sent you in a slumber you wasn’t expecting, being cured just made your body relax and take the rest if needed so much.

Half an hour later you went downstairs, some of the humana around and some of the vamps too. Once you entered the kitchen your eyes found Jason Stackhouse-Dixon, Daryl’s lil brother, and something occurred to you… he had drunk vampire blood before, he’d know something about it.

“Good evening, sleepyhead!” He greeted as you approached him. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine… I guess.” You vaguely answered. “I need to ask you something…”

“Yeah?” He opened a beer bottle for him and Abraham.

“What exactly are the side effects of drinking vampire blood?” You practically whispered.

“Well… there are plenty of them. Your senses become heightened, you may have hallucinations, the vampire will be able to feel if you’re in danger and…”he was enumerating the ‘symptons’.

“And waking up with a moist mountain after dreaming of praying with the knees upward.” Abraham completed after sip on his beer.

You stared at him blankly, the gears in your brain trying to understand whatever he tried to tell you. “He means, having wet dreams.” Jason spoke after clearing his throat.

Oh! You have almost forgotten Abraham dated Rosita, who was a vampire, so of course he would know. Before Jason connected the reason of your question with the embarrassment on your face, Daryl entered the kitchen and went to fridge to get a bottle of Tru Blood.

“Good evening sunshine, how did ya sleep?” He leaned on the counter a smirk on his face. He knew. God, he probably even had the same dream. You didn’t know what were the rules of this connection thing you now had with him.

“Awfully.” That was the only answer you could give while images from your dream came to your mind and blush crept through your face.

“Nah, it looks like ya slept too damn well.” He told you, that freaking smirk never leaving his lips.

“Next time I’m almost dead, y’all better let me die.” You advised the others in the room. No way, you wanted his blood in you again. No way, you wanted to experience those wonderful sensations from your dream. No way, you got curious about how would it feel in real life. No way!

“In your dreams, sunshine!” Daryl shout at your back while you left the kitchen bothered, flustered and hot with the recent happenings.

Final Note: It all sounded a lot better when inside my mind. Thank you so much @celtic-crossbow for the help with Abe’s language 🩷

Wanna be added to my tag list? Let me know. (Please tell me if you want to be tagged on everything or just specific series) Everything Taglist: @lilyevanstan1325 @hayley1998

Divider and MDNI banner by @anitalenia

[bittersweet-folder]

~☆□ seventeen imagines: [ Hip hop unit ]

~☆how they react when you want to kiss all over their face but with your lipstick on: (slightly suggestive so minors dni) .

Word count: 1437 words (sorry lol) • Masterlist

These are honestly small scenarios literally-

♡Seungcheol:

"Babe! Cheollll!!! Listen!!!"

Cheol, who was lying on his bed, now looked up from his phone. "What is it baby?"

"Which color do you like the most??" You held up two shades of red lipstick. A dark wine red and a raspberry red shade.

Cheol pondered for a minute on which one should he choose. He really loved the wine red shade and how enticing it looked on your pretty lips.

"The wine red one!"

"Okayyy!"

You applied some and Seungcheol watched you with confusion.

"Y/n i don't know if there's a special occasion or something and I don't understand- why are you doing your makeup before dressing up" Seungcheol asked outta dread if he actually forgot if there's any special occasion.

"Well no there isn't. I just wanna place plenty of kisses all over your face with my lipstick on" You said nonchalantly

"Oh oka- wait what!?" His ears went red and cheeks became all blushed upon hearing this.

"Cheollieee you are blushing"

"Y/n stop teasing"

"Okay then I can do the lipstick thing right~ pretty please with a cherry in top~"

He thought "it wouldn't be bad I guess".

"Okay fine" He said smiling.

Without further ado, you went closer, sat on his lap with your legs on one side and started planting soft kisses, first on his lips then all over the cheeks and then forehead. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't melting into the fuzzy feeling of those soft kisses. After you were done you looked at him and he had a love drunk gaze on you, which, most definitely, wanted more. And then you kissed him on the lips and he kissed you back. A soft and sweet kiss.

"You look sooo pretty babyy" you said.

"All thanks to you my love"

♡Wonwoo:

You were apparently lying, stomach down on your bed, scrolling through Pinterest as usual. You again came across that video of the couple where one of them is kissing their partner ,all over their face, with lipstick on. Wonwoo was in his gaming room at that moment. You wondered if Wonwoo would like it or not. You let out a frustrated sigh.

"I'm sure he won't let me but I can ask I guess-" You thought.

"WONWOO can you please come here!!" you called him. After a few minutes he came.

"What is it y/n? Are you hungry-"

"Nope I ain't hungry but I wanna try something"

Wonwoo raised his eyebrows " And what exactly is it?"

"I'll kiss you with my lipstick on-" you paused for a second "can I??"

You showed him the video and he'd be lying if blood wasn't rushing through his cheeks. He was pondering for a moment.

"Pretty pleaseee just once and then I'll fulfill any of your wishes as well"

"Oh- really? Fine I'll let you" he smirked after saying that.

"Okayyy wait". You brought your lipstick and settled on his lap, legs on either side. You applied a generous amount of lipstick on your lips and cupped his cheeks. He took the chance and pulled you closer making your eyes go wide. And then you started planting soft kisses, first on his lips then his slowly all over his cheeks. You could feel him smiling. He was relishing the feeling of your soft warm lips on his face. You left a soft peck on his nose in the end then looked at him with a smile laced on your lipstick smeared lip.

"You look like cat who got his face kissed like this"

"Well do I look okay?"

"You look so freaking cute"

"All your work of art madam y/n" he grinned.

"And oh about the wish…" Wonwoo smirked as his hands squeezed your thighs. ".. how about we try to tie your hands tonight~"

Blood rushed through your cheeks.

"WONWOOOO! you-" you hid your face on the crook of his neck while he chuckled at your reaction.

♡Mingyu:

"Gyuuu babyyyyyy please let me do it" You were following Mingyu like a duckling who was apparently grabbing some snacks from the kitchen cabinet for the movie night you guys planned.

"Nooooo y/n you aren't doing that to my face with your darkest red lipstick on" Mingyu was pouting while taking out your favorite snacks.

"Plsplsplspls just onceeee" Your eyes were sparkling with that utter happiness hoping your boyfriend would let you kiss his face with the red lipstick on just to leave some lip imprints on his face, just like you saw on that Pinterest post you came across. He turned around and looked at you with his lips pressed together in a thin line. How could he deny those sparkly eyes with hopes determined to try something new.

"Okay okay fine but just once okay babe?" He said while cupping your face with both of his hands.

"YAYYY okay lemme grab my lipstick"

You ran back to the bedroom, grabbed your lipstick and came back to the kitchen.

Gyu picked you up and made you sit on the kitchen counter top. You let out a yelp in surprise. And then started to apply a generous amount of lipstick on your lips as Mingyu watches you . You pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt. And started planting soft kisses starting from his cheeks to his forehead to his chin and then nose. Everywhere on his face but his lips. Just like Mingyu was happy about you kissing all over his face, he was sulking as well because you didn't kiss his lips, yet you kissed right under the place of his lips.

"Y/n baby you know very well what you're doing" He said pouting.

"What? What am I doing?" You said, trying to act fool.

"Alright then" he announces before smashing his lips onto yours. Your eyes went wide but you loved it. You loved an impatient Gyu. After kissing for a while you guys pulled away. Your lipstick was smeared. And Gyu looked so freaking cute.

"Mission accomplished! Now we take a pic"

"Nooooo"

"Hell yess"

You took out your phone, turned on the camera. Gyu was very amused by how he looked. And you slung a hand around his neck and you both posed and clicked a picture.

"You look so cuteee Gyu" you squealed. Mingyu smiled looking at your reaction.

"Sure miss y/n it's your work of art after all"

♡Vernon:

"Boinonieee~" You called Vernon like this every time you had a request which you think he might hesitate to fulfill.

"Yeah?" Vernon's eyes were glued to the bright screen in front of him. He was in between a gaming match with Mingyu, Cheol and Wonwoo.

"I have a request"

"Just a second y/n"

"Okay"

You sat on the bed quietly staring at him.

You laid back on his bed scrolling through your phone. He was concentrated but at the end lost the game.

"Ahhhh wow I lost yet again"

"Hansol Vernon Chwe, it's okay. Now come here. Right! Now!"

"Not my full name- and what is it?".he was definitely caught off guard with the full name calling.

"Okay so can I kiss you?"

Vernon was confused. Why would you ask him if you want to kiss him?

"To be more specific, can I kiss you with my lipstick on? So it leave the lipstick prints on your face-"

There was an awkward silence with a nervous smile on your lips. Vernon was surprised but he actually liked the idea if he was being honest. And he had seen those videos of leaving lip prints on your partner's face before.

"Alright go ahead"

"REALLY!?"

He had a grin laced on his lips and thumb up confirming you about it.

You applied your lipstick, a light dusty red shade. Vernon watched you intently. He really admires you when you put on makeup and get all dolled up. You're just so pretty, he can't get enough of you. You sat on lap and then lightly pressed a kiss on his lips. When he went to kiss you back you pulled back and then pressed soft kisses all over his cheeks and corner of his eye and lips. One on his neck as well because you both knew how much he loved your neck kisses.He loved every sec of it. He loved the warm feeling of your lips.

"You look so freaking adorable Vernon" You giggled.

"All because of you my lady" he said and smiled.

a/n: bewitched series is next~

[ch0k3herwithaseaview]

@jegulus-microfic | april 16 embarrass | words: 1,3k

this one is a lighter version of what happened to me during easter lol enjoy;3

tw: blood, hospital, stitches, needles, accident

part two

Regulus went out with Barty and Evan—nothing new.

They drank—also nothing new.

The fact that Regulus had forgotten how to ride a bike, however, was new.

Everyone always says you can’t forget how to ride a bike, and maybe it’s true, but when you do it for the first time in almost two years while drunk, it turns out to be quite hard.

The first few minutes were okay; he was a bit wobbly, but he managed to ride on his own. The problem started as they passed the old shrine. It was placed on a sharp turn, and Regulus, instead of turning left as he should, started turning right. He could see the bike hitting the curb and the pavement getting closer and closer with every passing second. Alright, he thought, I’m going to hit it. He didn’t even try to pull out his hands to cushion the fall; he just flew like a log on his face.

Regulus lay there for a few seconds, hearing his friends laughing behind him, and then started laughing himself. He stood up, dusted off his trousers, and touched his chin. There was a hole in it; Regulus could feel it.

“Hey, does it look bad?” He turned to face his friends, and that’s when he felt a thick liquid rolling down his neck.

“Reg, that looks fucking awful; we’re going to the hospital,” Evan said firmly, taking Regulus’ hand and leading him to sit a bit further from the road.

“Show me,” he said, laughing lightly, because what else has he left?

Barty snorted, taking his phone out and, a second later, blinding Regulus with its flash. When he saw the photo, he just started laughing harder.

“Oh fuck, I look so bad; we should call Pandora,” he choked out, trying to keep the wound closed (he didn’t manage it).

A few minutes later, Panda’s old peugeot stopped next to them. The girl grabbed his face and started cleaning it with wet wipes, mumbling how irresponsible Regulus is.

“Hold it,” she commended sternly. “You had one job, one, and still failed at it,” Pandora turned to address all three giggling boys. “Take his bike; I’ll text when we’re at the hospital.”

***

“Regulus, I swear to god, if you don’t shut up, I will—oh, thank fuck, take him away from me, please,” Pandora said to someone behind him. As Regulus turned around, he felt cured right then and there, because in front of him stood the most beautiful man he’s ever seen, with his messy curls, golden skin, and that stunning smile.

The man chuckled, and that’s when Regulus realised his jaw had gone slack.

“Are you Regulus?” the man asked.

“Are you God?” Reg replied before he could stop himself. Mr. Beautiful started straight out laughing at that.

“Well, I’m your doctor, so kinda? I guess?” The doctor answered, inviting Regulus to the treatment room. “What happened?”

Regulus considered all of his options: tell the truth and sound like an alcoholic who gets himself into accidents, or come up with some lie.

Because he didn’t feel like he could come up with a good one, Regulus chose the first option.

“Oh, I’m going to embarrass myself as fuck,” he giggled, while the doctor, whose name he couldn’t quite read from the name tag on his scrubs, started cleaning the wound. “Wait, can you—can you stop moving for a second?” The doctor did what he was asked to do. Regulus reached for the little piece of plastic attached to the pocket on the doctor's chest and finally got what he wanted. Letting go of the man’s clothing, Regulus continued, “So, James, did your parents teach you how to ride a bike?”

The doctor, James, snorted, “Yes, Regulus, they taught me how to ride a bike; why?”

“Well, I thought mine did too, but today I realised they did a shitty job at it.” James erupted into laughter, taking a step back from Regulus. “What? I mean it! Look, if they taught me better, I probably wouldn’t be here!”

“That, or if you drank a little less,” the taller man huffed, coming back closer to Regulus. He knew the doctor was right, but he still felt the need to roll his eyes.

After a few minutes, James told him it looked really bad and they would need to stitch him up.

“If you're afraid I'll disfigure your face for the rest of your life, I can call someone else,” Regulus heard, and he responded with a dismissive hand gesture.

“Stitch away; I don’t mind. Besides, scares are kinda badass,” another round of chuckles.

“Alright, just don’t make me laugh while I do it, or you really will look bad when I’m done.”

Regulus could hear some metal things clicking against each other and could feel the fear creeping up his neck. He started scraping the nail polish off his nails, waiting for the worst. James must’ve noticed somehow, because he asked if Regulus felt alright.

One moment Regulus was staring at the overhead lamp, and the next there was a blue cloth covering his face.

“What the fuck?” he grumbled, grabbing at it. “Take it off; I can’t see shit.”

He could hear James sighing, and then his face came back into view. Regulus couldn’t help but smile at the sight.

“If you weren’t so funny, I would put them all on you,” the other man muttered, throwing away the blue thing. “Okay, since you’re under the influence, I can’t administer local anaesthesia, but you have enough piercings to know the feeling.”

“Yeah, and I certainly do not do them for the feeling,” he mumbled, putting his hands underneath his buttocks.

James grabbed a needle with medical thread already pulled through it. He lowered himself closer to Regulus’ face and looked up into his eyes.

“Ready?”

“I will never be, so just go. Please,” was all Regulus could choke out while looking into those deep hazel eyes that crinkled at the response, probably from the smile hidden under the mask.

James looked back down at Reg’s chin and placed the needle in the wound area. As it went in and out, creating the first stitch, Regulus could feel a tear rolling down his temple.

“You okay?” James asked, looking into his eyes again. This time, only a whimper came out of Regulus. “Don’t worry, just one more,” the doctor said in a soothing tone, his eyes softening.

The second time was the same yet worse—Regulus wanted to run as he felt the needle just near his face.

After that, James cleaned him up again and gave him instructions on how to treat the wound.

“See you in two weeks; I’ll take them off,” he said, handing the discharge from the hospital to Regulus.

I’m drunk, Reg thought to himself. If it goes south, I can blame it on the vodka.

“Why not in two days?” he said out loud.

James looked at him, puzzled. “Excuse me?”

Regulus cleared his throat. “Why wait two weeks when we can see each other sooner?”

“I can’t take the stitches sooner then—"

“Not to take off the stitches, doctor,” he said, smirking slightly.

James eyes went wide. For a moment that felt like hours, they sat in silence, just looking at each other, waiting.

When the silence stretched out a bit more, Regulus decided to abort the mission.

“You know what? I’m drunk; I should just—"

“Does Tuesday at 8:00 sound good?” James said at the same time. It took Regulus a few seconds to register what he just heard, but when it finally got to him, he positively beamed at James.

“Yeah,” he said, his eyes sparkling with excitement. “Yes, that sounds lovely.”

[thatlovelywitch]

𝙰𝙾𝚃 𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙾𝚁 𝙰𝚄 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙲𝙾𝙿𝙴 𝙿𝙰𝚁𝚃 2

✨Falco Grice's cheeks have never seen a day of rest since he joined the cast. They are everyone's personal squishie or stress ball and they're always red when he goes home

✨ Levi has another signature other than the iconic cut: kohl. No matter the fit, his eyes are kohled on the red carpet

✨ Levi and Hange did a hit psychological horror movie together as the main leads. Theatre was shook, Tiktok was shook, Theatre was shook and people watched it for.....the amazing plot (the plot was Hange in a lacy black bar and low rise jeans covered in blood and Levi in the shower)

✨ Sasha has taken singing/music lessons since she was a kid, so she has a beautiful voice and can play the electric guitar, acoustic guitar, piano and keyboard. She has a music career aside from acting, and her songs tend to go viral Tiktok for cute trends. Her music has Clairo or Mazzy Star vibes, but she also likes it a bit risque so expect some softer R&B Kehlani type beats too. She tends to forget a lot of her fans are kids though LOL apology statements have been released (left a lip stick mark on an adult male fan's shirt and humped the floor while there were kids in the audience chile)

✨ Armin is THE SWEETEST EVER to kid fans like kid fans are his favorite and it shows. He'll always doodle a heart or sumn when he signs an autograph and you bet he'll go all soft complimenting the kid's mini plushie of him or their little Survey Corps cape

"Aww look at your cape yknow little buddy I had one too but it's not as cool as yours"

✨ Historia and Ymir. NOBODY has deciphered to this day if they're besties or dating it's that confusing and they don't make it any easier to guess.

✨ Annie and Mikasa call each other "wifey" and people try and start like imaginary beef between them like 13 year olds with too much time lol and all the while they're gossiping at award shows and feeding each other pudding or having sleepovers

✨ Zeke is a swiftie and he was the most EMBARRASSING CELEB MEMBER IN THE CROWD 😭 my brotha was twerking during more sensual or hardcore songs and he was getting drunk back there

✨ Erwin is NEVER dodging Captain America allegations he's tried to deny the rumors of him replacing Chris Evans since 2013 to no avail

✨ Erwin is a girl dad who keeps his relationship with his wife very private but sometimes he shares pictures of his life as a married man. The fandom will never get over him in a pink wig

✨ Pieck is a pretty privilege Tiktok lipsync star and we love that for her

✨ Jean and Connie did the Buzzfeed thirst tweets video tgt

✨ "Dude listen I've been goin to the bathroom with him for a decade now and it's more of a pony than a horse"

"Istg if yo bald head don't-"

✨ Eren Yeager reposts bad mafia x y/n Tiktok POV's of him

✨ Eren calls his fans pookie

[mysilaan]

What’s sleeping with the Touchstarved LIs like? Nothing sexual. Just. Sleeping lol eepy pals

I like imagining Ais moving in his sleep BUT you only get to notice that once you wake up lol (he’s curled up in the corner of your bed fast asleep with the blanket at his feet) ALSO BIG BUT!!!!! That’s only if he’s not cuddling you to sleep (smth he does often). Only then will he sleep sound and motionless. He doesn’t give a shit if his arm falls asleep. GIVE HIM CUDDLES.

Sleeping with Leander is just with him standing in the corner of the room. Unblinking. Covered in the shadows. He Does Not Sleep. He’s normal though, I swear :-) :-) jk I love to have this man.

HELLO ANON

Hope you’re good! I love this request… I don’t know if Ais sleeps actually… But if he does I’m sure he’s a light sleeper. For Leander that guy might as well be dying from lack of sleep LMAO

For the other LIs… Kuras definitely doesn’t sleep, I think Mhin is pretty paranoid so I’m imagining they have a lot of nightmares, or insomnia… For Vere, idk why but he gives off the vibe of the heavy sleeper: he’s 100% taking all the place in the bed and is impossible to wake up against his will… Well, basically a cat.

BUT I did write a little something about Ais (and a small part about Leander) because your ideas were funny to write, I had to…

After blood, sweat and tears it's finally here... And I can't not thank @aiscapades for helping me edit the text (most of the prettiest sentences are their...) if you ever write something I'll definitely devour it because you sublimed this headcanon...

Enjoy!! 🫶

TOUCHSTARVED HEADCANON🍒

Ais and Leander centered

⭐

The ambiance at the Wet Wick that night was quite festive, as it almost always was, but it was particularly noisy this time. The barman didn’t have a second to rest; every minute, someone went to the bar to order another drink. You were seated with Leander and Ais in a corner of the tavern, the three of you sharing a drink or several... The mood between you was light. Leander and Ais were lightheartedly sharing some death threats as usual, while you were listening to them, a grin on your face. You were pretty wasted because of all the drinks Leander suggested you try, while Ais was giving you a disapproving glance.  It felt kind of awkward to be the only drunk one around the table you thought while partially listening to whatever they were saying. You didn’t like being treated like an idiot, so you stopped the boys in one of their quarrels by slamming your hand in the center of the table. “Why am I the only one who can’t hold my drink here? I find it pretty unfair. Why did you make me drink so much?” Ais raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think it’s about how badly you hold your drink, but much more because of how many of those weird drinks you got from Leander.” That remark made you pretty upset, and Leander’s laughter turned your cheeks more red than they already were. “I can’t refuse a challenge!” “Yeah, that’s the problem,” Ais added. Leander leaned over the table to get his face closer to yours. “You know, I’m pretty impressed you’re still alive with all that you drank.” You didn’t know if he was serious or not. The smile on his face could be a hint of sarcasm or genuine amazement… You were too drunk to guess which one it was anyway, so you started joking. “Oh babe… You know it’s hard to get rid of me.” “Really…?” Leander answered with a smirk on his face. The tension between the two of you started getting heavier… Did he want to make out with you or kill you? You had no idea, and you would never be able to know as Ais pulled Leander back on his chair by the collar of his jacket. “If you want to mate so badly, the room’s upstairs.” “We’re not animals,” you simply said. “Are you, Sparrow?” He grinned widely, proud of his teasing. “Har har. Very funny. I already told you to stop calling me that!” “Make me.” His lips were pulled back in a wide grin, his amusement giving a clear view of his fangs.

A sudden thought that you couldn’t restrain, popped in your head. Your alcoholised mind was making it hard for you to process any coherent thought, so you simply stood up and looked straight in Ais’ eyes. “Come.” You turned your head toward Leander, and stared at him in a weird way for a few seconds as if you wanted to tell him something by telepathy. But you didn't add any further clarification. Instead, you stood up from the table and made your way up the tavern stairs. “What the fuck…" Ais breathed, dumbfounded.  The two boys sat in silence for a while, gazes locked across the table, before Ais got up and joined you upstairs. The place was barely lit by a single candle in the corner of the room. Ais closed the door behind him before asking: “What’s wrong with you?” You took him by the shoulders to make him sit on your bed… But as strong as he was, there wasn't much you could do to actually make him do that. “Please, sit.” He raised an eyebrow. “I don’t receive orders.” Though, when you tried to push him on your bed once again, he did sit. You were now face to face. His towering height usually made it hard for you to make eye contact, but you could do it effortlessly now. You climbed on the bed yourself, placing your knees at both extremities of his body, now placing yourself over him. You took his face between your hands and looked at it in detail from beneath you. He had a captivating red gaze, surrounded by pretty, long eyelashes. Long, dark strands of hair cut across his face, bisecting it just along his nose, but you still knew the angles of his features well. From the scar on his left eyebrow to his defined jawline, you looked at everything there was to see on his face. “Getting an eyeful, Sparrow?” You reddened. Sitting here next to him, you only now realized just how heavy your body felt from all those drinks. You swayed forward some, accidentally nudging Ais, which just sent him further down to the bed. Your face found a spot against his neck, and you inhaled a breath. He smelled good: his scent was a mix of cigarette, what seems to be some cologne and a bit of all the alcohol he drank earlier. Your heart started beating faster and you prayed for him not to notice. He couldn’t know you had feelings for him. It’s at this moment that his hands tensed on your shoulders, in an attempt to pull you back.

“Hey, get off. You’re clearly drunk.” But you didn't answer, nor did you move. He held firm, raising his voice a bit as he said once more, "Sparrow." What should've been an inquisitive prompt was instead flattened into a curt demand for a response.  He started to maneuver you onto your back, intending to just let you fall gently into the mattress, but he froze mid-action.  "You can't be serious..." he muttered, eyes wide.  You were sound asleep, still clinging to his arm. Ais sighed out of frustration one more time, asking himself what to do. But he didn’t think about it much longer. “Well… Let’s just stay here for tonight.” He put himself under the sheets, covering you with them at the same time.

⭐

You were cold. Goosebumps lined the flesh of your body. You slowly woke up, searching for your blanket. When you finally felt its fabric under your fingers, you grabbed it to cover yourself, but a stronger pull on the other edge of it almost tore your arm apart (once again…). You sat up on your bed with a start and gasped when you saw who was at the other edge. “What the… Ais?” What was he doing in your bed? Your first move was to look at how you were dressed, and when you noticed that you still had on the clothes you wore yesterday, you let out a relieved sigh. Ais got immediately woken up when you spoke and looked at you with annoyance. “Keep it down, would you?” “Hey! You’re the one in my room, stealing my blanket. What are you doing here?” But instead of answering, his head snapped toward something in the middle of the room. It was still dark outside, so it was hard for you to see what got his attention. “What is it?!” you asked, panicked. When your eyes finally adapted to the bit of light the moon was offering, a scream escaped from your mouth. “What the fuck?!” Leander was there, sat on a chair, feet laid on the low table of your bedroom. His arms were crossed and he was simply looking at the two of you from where he was, unblinking. “Is he… sleeping with his eyes open?” you asked Ais. But he didn’t answer. Leander did. “No, I’m awake.” He surprised you once more, and you let out another brief, startled scream. “Since when are you here?!” “Oh. Four hours maybe?” Your jaw dropped. How could he answer that with such casualness? “What… When do you sleep?” Leander got up from his chair and opened the door with a smile. “I don’t.” He left you completely agape. It wasn’t the first time Leander was giving off such strange vibes, but the more you got to know him, the weirder he was to you. When you turned toward Ais to ask him if what happened was a normal thing from Leander, you noticed he disappeared too. “Well…” You couldn’t find it in you to get back to sleep after what happened, and you stayed awake until you could see the sun rise. You told yourself that maybe you should talk to Kuras about what just happened; he was the most ‘normal’ one of this weird group, and you were going to need something for your hangover anyway… You’ll remember to lock your door next time.

[writingreadinglurkingandsmirking]

You Should Find Another Guiding Light - Rafe Cameron x Reader

Dear Reader Duology: Part 1, Part 2

Summary: With you drunk at Kelce’s party, Rafe has to drive you, his ex, home. Neither of you are over each other and both of you know it, for better or for worse. That doesn’t make things easy. Not at all. Word Count: 3.7k+ TWs/CWs: She/her pronouns used, adult/profane language, descriptions of a party, descriptions of drunkenness, a guy being a weirdo, Rafe being a little bit crazy, angst with the potential for a happy ending, I guess. Note: The title is in fact a Taylor Swift lyric lol. I don’t know, I just wanted to dip my toes in the OBX writing arena and I just had this idea pop into my head and not leave me alone so here it is. I think I might end up doing a part 2 for this just because I don’t want this to be Sad, but we shall see.

Rafe heard the chant of, “Go, go, go, go,” from the other side of the house.

The chant didn’t interest him even remotely. Pretty much nothing about the party did, actually. And if it weren’t at Kelce’s house while his parents were out of town, he wouldn’t have even bothered to come. The high he’d been riding had faded nearly an hour ago, and the drink in his hand was not nearly strong enough. He wasn’t even buzzed anymore, this was boring. All these fucking parties were boring now. Had been since…well, long enough now.

“Rafe,” he heard to his left, while about to bring the cup to his lips. He cut his eyes to the side. It was Topper, a grim look on his face, lips turned firmly downward. Rafe raised an eyebrow, lowering the cup. “Get the fuck out here, I need your help.”

“What?” he asked, huffing as he put down his cup on the nearest surface. Before Topper could answer, though, Rafe noted the ongoing chants from outside. A chant that was exclusively a mixture of his ex’s name—your name, the reason that nothing was enjoyable anymore—and cheers. “Oh fucking hell no.”

“Yeah, exactly,” Topper said dryly. “Me and Kelce just had to stop her from doing a keg stand in a skirt.”

“I swear to God,” Rafe growled. 

Rafe shouldered past him quickly making his way outside. You were dancing. He didn’t inherently have a problem with that. He loved watching you dance, in fact. Especially when you were drunk. But, that wasn’t even half the issue. He was torn between a mixture of fury and concern when he saw you, standing on top of the outdoor bar with some random guy holding your legs and trying to look up your skirt. The skirt that Rafe knew personally you almost never wore anything under. He couldn’t even imagine how drunk you were right now to not be flicking that guy’s hands off of you.

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Topper advised.

“Shut the fuck up, Top,” Rafe retorted harshly.

He strode forward, landing his hand aggressively on the guy’s shoulder and squeezing it until the man winced and tried to pull away. Then, Rafe only squeezed tighter. The guy shouted in protest to the rough grip, but Rafe didn’t care. The tool still had the nerve to have his fucking hand on your leg. You hadn’t even noticed that Rafe was standing there yet, which was another mark to just how out of it Rafe knew you had to be.

“What the fuck, Cameron?” the guy demanded.

“I’m sorry, who are you?” Rafe spat. “And what the fuck do you think that you’re doing?”

The guy, obviously far too stupid for his own good, smirked at Rafe. Actually fucking smirked. Rafe felt his blood pressure rising. Rafe saw, somewhere in his periphery that Topper and Kelce were both coming his way. He didn’t particularly care. He could easily handle this loser himself.

“You two aren’t even together anymore,” the guy said smugly. “So, last I checked she’s a free agent, isn’t she?”

“Oh Jesus fucking Christ,” Kelce muttered behind him.

Rafe paid no mind to it, hand moving from the guy’s shoulder to his throat. Rafe smiled at the shock in the guy’s eyes, an angry glint in his eyes. He ignored the other’s weak attempts at dislodging him and instead took a step closer, glaring down at the little fucker.

“Take your hand off her or you won’t have a hand,” he said flatly. Idiot that he was, literally being choked and surrounded by Rafe’s friends, the guy still didn’t move his hand. Rafe let out a harsh laugh, tilting his head to the side slightly, looking more pissed by the second. “We can jump from you losing the hand to me killing you. Your fucking choice.” Starting to go purple in his face, Rafe laughed at the guy again, not loosening his hold. He reached over with his other hand, peeling his grip off of your leg, squeezing hard enough that Rafe was shocked the bones weren’t cracking. “Wasn’t so fucking hard to listen, was it?”

“Rafe,” Topper said sharply.

Rafe glanced back at him and then rolled his eyes. He let go of the guy and threw him away, hard, towards the ground. A good friend as always, Kelce caught the guy, then he and Topper started walking the jackass out to make sure he actually left the party. Yeah, Rafe was going to have to make sure that he never saw that guy again. Or, if he did, that it wasn’t in public like this. Rafe turned his attention back to you and was startled to see you looking down at him already.

“Rafe?” you asked, cocking your head to the side, looking, quite frankly, like a confused puppy.

Clenching his jaw, Rafe reached up, patting the bare skin of your leg, forcing himself to keep it brief and not let his hands linger on the bare skin. “Come on, Princess,” he said firmly.

Your brow furrowed. “Fuck you! I’m having fun,” you slurred.

At that, Rafe let himself roll his eyes. “Yeah. I’m not letting you dance on the bar and do a fucking striptease. You’ll hate yourself tomorrow,” he said sharply. You glared down at him, but Rafe didn’t care, knowing that he was absolutely right. “Get the fuck down.” You didn’t listen, unsurprisingly—you never had—so he physically grabbed you, carefully maneuvering your body off the bar without exposing you to the whole party.

“Rafe,” you whined, “stop it. I don’t want to go with you!”

“Liar,” he said, scoffing before he could stop himself. When you were level with his face, he grabbed your chin and made you look at him. “Stop fucking fighting me before you flash somebody.”

You glared at him. “Who cares if I do?” you asked.

Once again, Rafe rolled his eyes. “I’ll take their fucking eyes out. But, let’s not do this, Princess. I’ve had enough shit today without this added on,” he said through grit teeth, losing the limited patience he’d started with. He helped you off the bar—manhandled you, really—until you were standing on your feet, using his body for support to stay upright. 

“You have no right,” you said, sniffing.

“How much have you even had to drink?” Rafe asked, amusement overcoming his irritation for a second.

“Oh fuck you,” you repeated, pushing weakly at his chest, even though your hand tangled in the bottom of his shirt like it always did when you were utterly sloshed. “I haven’t even had that much!” You then took on a distinctly dizzy look, swaying and Rafe cursed, catching your waist to steady you. “See? I’m fine!”

“Yeah, you’re so fine,” he agreed sarcastically. 

Without waiting for you to say anything else, Rafe started guiding you toward the exit. He nodded at Kelce and Topper as they passed. He ignored the looks on his friends’ faces as best he could. He didn’t need to think about the shit he’d get from them about this in the morning. No, instead, he focused on forcing you into the passenger seat of his truck and making you get buckled up. Only after Rafe got into the car and started it did you seem to register that you weren’t at the party anymore.

“Hey! Where the hell are you taking me? I’m not going home with you!” you slurred, clearly in an argumentative mood.

“No. You’re not. I’m taking you home. To your house,” he replied, patience coming back at least a little bit now that they weren’t in the stupid party crowd.

“Rafael Cameron you fucking suck,” you accused glaring at him.

“Why’s that?” Rafe asked, backing up and then putting the car in drive and practically peeling out of Kelce’s driveway.

You scoff at his question. It would be adorable if it weren’t at his expense, Rafe was sure. “First you fucking break up with me out of nowhere! And give me no explanation at all! And you take half our fucking friends in the end! And then you kill the goddamn vibe the second I try to have fun at a party,” you declare sounding genuinely pissed.

“That’s not—” Rafe began, stopping himself with a sigh when you cut him off.

“No! Shut up!” you demanded, hitting his arm, once, twice, a third time, until Rafe sharply pulled over and turned to glare at you. He was angry now, except his anger was short-lived. The moment he met your eyes and saw that yours were full of tears, he deflated. Your bottom lip trembled and Rafe had to actively count his breaths to keep from not reacting to it. “Why are you ruining parties now? Was my life not enough for you? You have to take the rest of the good things left too?”

Rafe inhaled shakily. He pinched his nose and tapped his fingers against the wheel and then looked back towards you. “You know you didn’t want someone else touching you,” he said calmly. “You hate when people think they can touch you at parties. You always have.” He took a breath. “I don’t want to see anything happen to you. Especially when you’re too drunk to think clearly.” You went to retort but Rafe shook his head. “No. Stop. Just listen to me.” You rolled your eyes and looked away. Rafe caught your chin and turned your face so you were looking at him again. “I’m not going to watch some losers take advantage of you. Ever. You think that’d stop?”

“Why do you even care?” you spat, displaying sadness more than the anger he knew you were going for.

“Don’t ask me that,” Rafe warned, shaking his head. “Don’t act like you don’t know already. The dumb act has never worked for you.”

You scoffed. “Oh? So you’re a coward now too on top of everything else? Cool,” you said. “Can’t even talk to me, huh?”

Rafe let go of your face and turned away from you, pulling back on the road and driving faster now towards your house. “You know damn well why I care,” he said through grit teeth.

“Do I?” you challenged.

“Princess,” he said sharply, “don’t do this right now.” He took a deep breath even though he didn’t want to. “You’re drunk.”

“And?” you demanded. “That makes me an idiot?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” he said, groaning in irritation. You swatted at his chest again. And truly, if this were anyone else, he’d have kicked them out of the car. But it was you. “Come on, Princess.” He tapped the steering wheel to manage the anxiety brewing in his chest at the thought. “We can have a conversation about it when you’re sober if you want. But I’m not doing this with you drunk. Fuck that.”

“Fuck you,” you reiterated as if you hadn’t already said it to him a thousand times that night.

Even with that declaration, you were blessedly quiet the rest of the ride. You fiddled with the heat on your side of the truck, getting comfortable, and just stared out of the window. And for the rest of the ride, Rafe could almost pretend that things were normal. The way that they should’ve been. Except that you were leaning on the door and not him. And that both of his hands were on the wheel, instead of one resting on your leg. And your stony silence, even when your favorite songs came on the shared playlist neither of you had gotten around to deleting yet. The silence in the car in general, really.

At your house, Rafe had to nearly throw himself from the car to get to your side before you opened the door and tumbled out. Even doing that, you nearly fell from the truck in an uncoordinated heap, stubbornly not wanting his assistance. He huffed and righted your feet on the ground, holding your waist and looking you over. You leaned into the touch for a second before seemingly realizing it, then you pulled wildly away, nearly falling again until he caught you.

“You can be angry after I get you to your room,” he said firmly.

“Fine,” you muttered, frowning.

Rafe went to move but you wouldn’t move. He tried to force you to move, but you resisted every logical piece of your mind, and every attempt he made. You were firmly stuck to your spot as if trying to grow roots like a tree. So, he picked you up again, carrying you to the door. Graciously, your parents weren’t in town and the house was empty, so no one had to see this disaster unfold. 

He took your key and unlocked the door easily, locking it behind them for the time being. He didn’t really feel like risking someone coming in when he was corralling a drunk you and he couldn’t pay full attention to everything else. Then, he carried you upstairs like it was nothing to him. He dropped you gently on your bed and avoided looking at you as he grabbed a pair of clothes for you to change into. He went into your bathroom and got makeup remover, knowing that you’d be pissed if you woke up with a trace of makeup still on your face still. 

As he walked back into the room, Rafe regretted leaving almost immediately. Your eyes were swimming with tears and a few were spilling down your cheeks. You looked away from him, trying to avoid his gaze, but he wasn’t an idiot. He’d noticed. You tried to scrub them away and he sighed almost silently. Rafe put the stuff down on the bed next to you and then knelt down in front of you. He grabbed your hands but didn’t say anything and waited.

“I hate you,” you said weakly, bottom lip wavering.

“I know,” he said, nodding. He cracked a fake grin. “I do too.”

“Fuck you,” you said, shaking your head. You sniffled and Rafe immediately knew that he wasn’t leaving for a while still. He stroked the back of your hands and waited once more. You always cracked. It didn’t take long, only a few breaths. “I love you. I…I fucking hate you.” You leaned heavily toward him and he wrapped his arms around you without hesitation. “I love you. I wish I didn’t.”

“I know,” he repeated. He pressed a kiss to the side of your head. He let out a slow breath, deciding that fuck it, it didn’t matter anyway anymore, not if he didn’t think you’d remember this in the morning. “I love you too, Gorgeous. You know that.”

You let out a watery laugh. “No I don’t,” you denied. He frowned at the words. “You left me. I…I hate that you left me. I didn’t do anything!”

Rafe sighed. “We talked about this,” he said quietly.

“Fuck you. You decided. We didn’t talk about anything!” you reminded him.

And that was true. He grabbed your chin again, forcing your eyes to meet yet again. This time though, he leaned your foreheads together. Your bottom lip trembled, but you happily stayed close to him. He took it as the tiny, tiny, minuscule win that was. He moved his hand from your chin to your cheek, thumb tracing a pattern up and down, soothing and slow.

“I need to make sure you’re safe,” he reminded you.

“You’re stupid,” you said, pulling away from him. “Just because we’re not together doesn’t mean I’m safe. Everyone knows that we were together. Everyone knows that to get to you they’d just have to use me. So I’m not suddenly more safe.”

“Safe from me,” Rafe gruffly corrected. When you open your mouth to retort, eyes alight with anger, he places his hand over your mouth. “Like I said, Gorgeous. We can talk about this later. When you’re not drunk. If you even want to still.”

“Oh? You’ll stop ignoring me then?” you asked from behind his hand. “Act like the adults that we are?”

Rafe rolled his eyes. “I haven’t been ignoring you. I’ve been giving you space,” he said. He let out a rough sigh, then shook his head, reminding himself that this would have to wait. “I promise we will talk about it if you want to. “Now can I please just help you change and get this stupid fucking makeup off you?”

Miracle of miracles, you didn’t try to fight him on it. So, he helped you change, ignoring the wandering hands and clumsy advances from you with ease. And then he forced you to get all the makeup off and brush your teeth. Then, he made you drink a bottle of water and settle in bed. You were pouting at him, tears still falling from your eyes—he didn’t know if they’d stopped since they started—that he brushed away lazily. Rafe sighed and sat next to you, stroking your cheek. Your hand landed on his knee, the touch almost hard as though you needed to squeeze his leg to remember he really was there. It broke his fucking heart.

“Come on, you gotta stop. We just got more water in you,” he said softly. “You know I can’t leave you when you’re upset like this. Not when you’re alone here.” He nearly winced at his phrasing when you seemed to cry harder for a moment. “Come on, Princess. You gotta stop crying.”

“Then I guess you can’t leave,” you replied shakily.

Rafe bit his lip, looking down at you. Knowing that he was already fucked anyways, he moved, pulling you practically into his lap. He held you tightly, glad that you didn’t even make an attempt at brushing the affection off. No, you leaned into the touch like you’d been starved of love your whole life. You laid your head right over his heart, eyes closed. He felt the way that your hands tapped the rhythm of his heartbeat into his arm. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“I don’t want you to doubt that I love you. I don’t want you to doubt that…that our relationship is…was real,” Rafe said. “I do love you. It’s just…hard, Gorgeous.”

You turned your head up to meet his eyes. He watched a flurry of intense emotions—every single one he’d ever experienced…more, maybe—flash through your eyes in a matter of seconds. You reached up and stroked his cheekbone…his nose…his lips. Then, you dropped your hand to lay on his chest, right next to where your head was.

“We’ll talk about it,” you declared. “I want to. We have to.”

“Okay, Princess,” he agreed softly. He knew that there was a chance sober you wouldn’t actually want to talk to him. He could ignore that in the meantime. He could live in this moment. In the false hope of a promised future where you did want to talk to him. “We’ll talk.”

You leaned up and pressed an incredibly short fleeting kiss to his lips before burying your face in his chest. He closed his eyes and held you tighter, wishing that things were…different.  “Can you just…stay until I fall asleep?” you asked quietly. “I know you won’t stay all night, but…please?”

Rafe’s heart, again, broke for you. And he hated himself for hurting you the way that he was. “Yeah,” he said, voice hoarse. He stroked your arms, soothing. “I’ll stay until you fall asleep, Princess.” He knew it wouldn’t be long anyhow. Your eyes were already heavy, staying shut longer than they were staying open.

“I miss you, Rafe,” you admit quietly.

“I miss you too,” he said, equally quiet.

You paused. “I love you,” you said.

Rafe inhaled shakily. “I love you too. So much,” he said, voice sounding choked and short.

“Do you promise?” you whispered.

He paused. He had no doubt you heard his heart stutter in his chest. “I promise.”

Your eyes started to drift closed longer and longer while Rafe rubbed a soothing pattern up and down your back until he was sure you were asleep. You were incredibly beautiful in this peaceful sleep, with even breathing and a smile on your face. It was the happiest he’d seen you look in a while. He knew it was his fault. Again, he hated himself for it. It made him sure that he did the right thing even if it killed you both right now.

He had to leave.

He let out a sigh and pressed another kiss to your forehead, then another. He took the time to inhale your scent, memorize the way that you felt in his arms…to be with you again. Then, carefully, he got out of your grasp and stood. Rafe then settled you comfortably on your bed and tucked you in. He pressed a final kiss to your forehead then stood and walked to your bedroom door.

He had to leave. He didn’t want to.

For a beat, Rafe paused in the doorframe. He looked down at your sleeping frame. He longed to just lay down with you and forget the trials of the past two months without you. The hell he went through without you. He shook his head though. You deserved better. He was sure of it. He was almost certain that sober you would agree. Still, as he walked quietly down the hall, locking the door again behind himself, and slipping out back to his truck, he found himself hoping. Hoping that you would call him. Hoping that you would still want to talk.

He had to leave. He didn’t want to. He loved you.

In the quiet of his car, he took the time to look at his phone. Just after two thirty in the morning now. Your smiling face, still his wallpaper, looked back at him. He stared at the image of you, smiling at him like he was the sun, and felt his heart squeeze so tightly it took his breath away. 

He had to leave. He didn’t want to. He loved you. You were everything, even now.

He started the car and started to drive back to his own place now. He tapped at the steering wheel again to avoid chewing at his nails like you hated—even now you kept him from bad habits he had, even if they were the little ones.

Rafe knew he wasn’t strong enough to stay away and he didn’t want to.

Even if it made him selfish, he hoped you called him—he hoped for a second chance.

[allbark-no-bite]

who are you mad at.

topper thornton x reader (wc: 3.4k)

summary: Topper doesn’t appreciate John B’s friendship with his girlfriend. sometimes all it takes is a blowjob and a little bit of forgiveness

warnings: 18+ smut, blow jobs, mentions of blood, over possessive boyfriend

author’s note: not me actually writing something with plot lol. i cannot believe all of the support i got on my last post, thank you all! i’m know that this isn’t Rafe lol, but i hope you’ll all give it a shot!

————————————————————————

As a little girl, I could never understand why the sheriff and the judge always drank coffee on my grandads front porch. It took me a few years to realize that it was probably for the same reason that the judge's grandson was always so sweet on me.

Politics in a small town like Kildare run deep on family ties and favors. It's all about who's blood is running through who and who's bed you wake up in when the sun comes up. As my best friend Sarah has often laughed about, it's all about how you know or who you'll blow.

Speaking of which, Topper's zipping up the fly on his jeans, fingers fumbling as he misses the hole for the button and has to try again. His cheeks are noticeably flushed, blue eyes distracted as he fidgets with his shaggy but nevertheless, neat crop of hair. No one would expect anything less of Figure Eight's golden boy.

I can't help but smile, biting my lip in an effort to conceal it from where I'm knelt on the floor. He's stupidly pretty. Blue eyes, straight nose, chin that dimples when he smiles.

He must feel my gaze on him because he catches my eye as he's buckling his belt and looks back at me. "What?" he laughs, breaking out into a bashful smile that matches my own.

"I don't know," I say, still smiling, and accept the hand he offers to pull me to my feet.

I don't remember when exactly Topper and I stopped being friends and started actually dating. It all happened so naturally that I don't know if we ever really distinguished between the two. One day we were just friends hanging out, getting drunk at the Boneyard, and then the next week he's kissing me at a party for everyone to see, like it wasn't a big deal that my best friend was kissing me. In some ways I guess it wasn't. It had never occurred to me that I would date anyone else. Sure Topper had dated Sarah for a while, but even that was short lived, and he had always been very upfront with me about it.

"Just you, I guess," I propose, grinning wider as he circles his arms around my waist, pulling me into him.

He's dressed up nicer than usual this evening for the Carrera's anniversary party in a billowy blue and white button up and khakis. The light colors pale in comparison to his bronzed skin, a likely permanent feature that the Carolina sun has given him.

"Really?" he hums, pecking my lips as my head tilts back to look up at him. My lips purse pliantly in response. Topper brushes aside the hair from my shoulder and hums, immediately pleased with the amount of exposed skin that he is rewarded with. The tank top that I'm wearing gives him the opportunity to ghost his lips along my shoulder until he settles on placing a kiss to the crevice of my neck.

My fingers curl into the brunette roots at the base of his neck at the attention. "It's not often I get you to myself."

With Topper's mom being the overbearing mother that she was, and the pressure that came with being the Judge's grandson, it was hard to get him out of their sights. However, if either bothered him, he never confessed such qualms to me. Such reasons are also why I think he was more privy to the political concept of our relationship than I was.

I remember being sixteen when a neighbor called the cops on one of Kelce's parties well after midnight. Of course no one knew this until Shoupe and a couple of his deputies showed up, sirens blaring. Most definitely a little buzzed and close to sobbing in the backseat of Shoupe's patrol car, I couldn't understand why Topper was so calm at the time. He just kept repeating, 'Don't worry about it, baby' and 'It'll all be fine'. At the time I hadn't noticed we were the only ones not in handcuffs. I thought for sure I was going to spent the night in jail and then my parents were going to kill me the next morning. He obviously knew something I didn't because twenty minutes later the patrol car was pulling into my driveway, Judge Thornton waiting on the porch with my grandad to take Topper home. The three of them shook hands and not a word was uttered about the incident again.

Topper dips his head to capture my mouth again, his teeth catching on the pout of my bottom lip.

Pressed to the front of my body, I feel his dick twitch in interest. I'm half compelled to drop to my knees and suck him off a second time just for the hell of it. The only problem is that he's got lipstick smeared on his mouth and his shirt is wrinkled and he's going to be late.

"Topper—" I begin.

"I know—I know—I know," he stresses, leaning down to kiss behind my ear again and then my cheek. "I'm going, I'm going."

Just when he pulls back and I go to step away, he grabs my face again, drawing my mouth back for another kiss.

"Topper—"

"I love you," he mumbles quickly after what is probably his hundredth kiss. "Okay. I'm going. I'll see you in a minute."

I watch him slip out the back door of the pool house we'd escaped to momentarily. I look over at the clock. What was supposed to be a quick five minute make out had turned into nearly half an hour. Thankfully, no one had been sent to look for us — namely my friends. Besides Kie and Sarah, the boys were off treasure hunting with Big John.

With all of the craziness going on in the past week, I was glad for the occasion to celebrate and enjoy the party. The evening air is cool and people are chattering excitedly, laughing and enjoying drinks. I spot Kie with her parents as I move throughout the crowd and she waves me over with a smile. Once I’m close enough, she latches onto my arm.

“We’ve got to get out of here. Big John was kidnapped, the boys are running off to South America to save him, and my parents won’t let me out of their sight,” she whispers through gritted teeth.

“Shit,” I whisper.

“Yeah, shit,” Kie stresses.

“Okay, okay. Don’t worry, I’m on it.” Turning to her dad with the brightest smile I can muster, I link arms with Kie. Thankfully, I fit in the with standard of friends Kid’s dad wants her to have, and he seems to be thankful I hang around.

“Hey, Mr. Carrera. I’m just going to steal Kie away for a moment. I promise we’ll be right back!”

He blinks, as if thinking about it for a moment before nodding. “Okay, just stay out of trouble you two.”

“We will!” I take off, dragging her with me as soon as the words leave his mouth. We haul it through throngs of tipsy guests, dodging anyone who might think to stop us.

“Wait!” Kie yelps snagging my arm before we reach the dock. Out of breath, I skid to a stop beside her.

“What—”

“Oh God,” she breathes.

Heart racing with adrenaline, I take another step towards the dock, dragging her along with me. “Kie, whatever it is, we have to go—”

“It’s John B. He’s talking to Topper.���

Straight ahead of us, I can make out John B’s wild head of hair and dingy yellow shirt. Him being the taller of the two, I glimpse the familiar white of Topper’s shirt just in front of him. Their voices are escalating by the moment, and I can make out the sound of Topper saying, “I want to know why you’re looking for my fucking girlfriend—”

“Oh God,” I repeat this time.

“(y/n), you need to go,” Kie stresses.

I take off before she even finishes her sentence, not even excusing myself as I dash past unsuspecting guests. People have started to stare and a sizable crowd has formed around them.

“— just because she’s your girlfriend doesn’t mean she can’t have friends without you.”

Topper scoffs. “Oh I see. This is about your little treasure hunting bullshit. So you think you can just run around with my girlfriend, do whatever the hell you want with her without me knowing?”

John B shoves him backwards, hard. “That’s not true!”

“John B, stop!” I shout, shoving my way to the front of the crowd as Topper catches himself. But it’s too late, John B is already grabbing the front of Topper’s shirt and yanking him to his feet.

The thing is, it’s not that Topper can’t defend himself, he’s more than capable of holding his own. It’s that he won’t. He won’t ruin his reputation in front of half the town. All he does is sneer, breathing hard as his blue eyes glint with hate. Topper had never liked my friends, only tolerated them for my sake — up until now.

“You think I don’t know?” Topper jeers. “All you’ve ever wanted is to get with (y/n).”

That’s all it takes for John B to swing. I scream as Topper stumbles backwards to the ground. Chaos erupts around us. I see Mr. Carrera hoist Topper to his feet, and my heart clenches at the sight. Blood is leaking from his nose and a dark rouge colored ring has already begun to form around his eye. When I move forward to help him, John B grabs my arm.

“We have to go. Now.”

My feet planted into the ground, I glance down at his split knuckles, and then back at Topper. Who do I choose? My best friend or my boyfriend?

Voice strained, I turn to John B. “I can’t just leave—”

“HELLO!! Now or never, guys!” JJ is on the dock with Kiara, and Sarah. Pope and Cleo are already in the boat.

“Go!” John B urges, shoving me in front of him. With one last look over my shoulder at Topper’s bloody face, I take off running down the dock with John B behind me.

—

I know he's mad before he even yanks the passenger side door open and drags me by my elbow to the car. Although his scowl and matching black eye are pretty heavy indicators, it's the stalk from the drivers side and around the front of the Jeep that tips me off.

"Get in the car, (y/n)," he barks without so much as a second glance at me.

John B and Pope glance at each other apprehensively. JJ and Kiara share similar looks.

With the passenger side door now open and Topper waiting for me to march myself over there, I hesitantly stand my ground. Anxiously, I swallow back the swell in my throat. "Go home, Top."

He throws his hands up in exasperation and shakes his head. "This—this is fucking ridiculous. Get in the car, (y/n)."

When I don't make a move either way, Cleo speaks up. "Leave her alone, man. She ain't gotta go nowhere wit' you." Her thick accent rings out loud and clear, but Topper pretends as though he doesn't hear her.

Having enough of our back and forth game, Topper strides over and grabs a firm hold of my elbow, intending to move me himself. Although I take a reflexive step backwards, I don't fight him off. At the same time, John B steps forward, ready to give Topper a black eye to match the other.

"John B, no," I immediately blurt out, twisting as best I can in Topper's grasp. "It's fine. It's fine." Sighing I turn back to Topper. "Okay," I relent. "Let's go."

We drive in silence for a while, waiting for the other to speak. I'm half hoping he won't and we'll make the entirety of the trip without uttering a word. Across the seat, we make eye contact and I scowl at him for the split second our eyes meet. Then I turn away and cross my arms with an air of defiance.

When I glance sideways at him, his jaw is clenched, eyes fixed on the road. I know him well enough to know that he's weighing out his options on what to say, determining what kind of conversation we're going to have.

He opens his mouth, starting to say something, then closes it and drags a hand over his jaw. "How many times did I call you?"

I shrug. "I don't know—"

"God dammit, (y/n). How many times did I call you!??" He slams his hand down on the console this time.

"I DON'T KNOW, TOPPER."

I do. Twenty-seven. He called twenty-seven times in addition to the missed texts and multiple question marks. I don't admit that though because it's easier to scream back at him than to admit that I was purposely avoiding his calls.

"You have got to stop hanging around with the wrong people. Start making better decisions." He's lowered his voice to a more appropriate volume now.

I glance over at him, a narrowed look on my face. "Who are you mad at, Topper?" I question. "Because I don't think it's me."

In the drivers seat, he continues to stare ahead at the road. "It's always fucking John B, isn't it. You always have to go to his rescue."

I set my jaw, knowing where his mind is and where this is going. "I didn't sleep with him, Topper."

Topper scoffs as if to make light of the situation. "Oh, for sure. You really expect me to believe that?"

"It's not like that. He's my friend."

We pull into his driveway, and Topper finally turns to me after parking the car. "Yeah? Well I'm your friend too, (y/n). You ever fucking think about that? Why do you think you're not sitting in jail right now with the rest of your so called friends?" He jabs a finger into his chest. "Me. Because I care about you!"

My back pressed up against the passenger side door, all I can do is blink in surprise. I'm not used to Topper yelling at me, and I'm not so sure I like it. I'd never thought about it that way before and guilt begins to creep into the pit of my stomach. My eyes suddenly sting and my nose burns with the threat of tears.

"I'm sorry," I whisper barley audible, my voice cracking.

Topper falls back heavily into his seat and sighs, running a hand over his face. Without a word, he gathers his keys from the truck's ignition and steps out of the car, slamming the door behind him. Teary eyed, I watch him take the steps up the porch and pace up and down the length of it while repeatedly running a frustrated hand through his hair. I get out of his truck and walk up the steps after a few minutes. Confident that he's done yelling but unsure of where we stand at the moment, I stop just short of him.

Hands in his pockets, Topper runs his gaze over me from head to toe after coming to a stop in front of me before he emits another heavy sigh and curls his hand around my jaw, forcing me to look upwards at him. "Answer me when I call you, alright?"

Nodding, I swallow under the weight of his hand as his fingers travel down to my throat. His blue eyes are focused and yet lack their usual jubilance. I nearly whine in relief when he leans down to kiss me.

He tastes fresh, like he always does, a mix between peppermint gum and mint toothpaste. The taste resonates within me a type of unspoken forgiveness that I sense is being granted as his other hand presses my body into his. I can feel the rigid outline of his cock through the thin fabric of his shorts, and it sends my heart racing in anticipation.

The thing about Topper is that he's always been able to read me impossibly well, and so when he disconnects our mouths by using the leverage of his hand on my throat to hold me back, he chuckles airily. "Feel me? That's what you do to me, you little tease."

I paw at him, grabbing at the waistband of his shorts to pull his body closer. Topper is nearly a foot taller than me, and I have to crane my neck to look up at him.

"I'm sorry, Top."

He hums, the thumb of his hand moving to tug at the swollen pout of my bottom lip. "Are you? He's only giving me a hard time now, not even allowing me to answer before his thumb slips into my mouth, pressing down on my tongue. "Going to be good for me then?"

The weight of his thumb is so soothingly familiar that I forget to respond in favor of suckling around the digit.

"Baby." He's quick to remind me, drawing his thumb from my mouth and swiping it wetly across my cheek to grip my jaw again.

My flushed cheeks forced into a pout, I nod as much as his hold on me will allow. "Mhm."

Topper glances over his shoulder, briefly surveying the closed blinds of the windows looking out on to the front porch, and then back to me.

"Alright, on your knees, pretty girl."

He doesn't have to ask twice. He's undoing his belt with one experienced hand and gathering a fist full of my hair at the back of my head with the other. Once removed from the confines of his boxers, his cock bobs at the freedom.

If there's one thing myself and multiple other girls in the Outer Banks can attest to, it's that sucking off Topper Thornton is a pleasure. I'd heard the rumors whispered around school even before we started dating. It was weird at the time, having to hear that kind of thing about my best friend, but once we started dating, I understood where they were coming from. With some guys, blowing them is an outright chore, but not Topper. He knows exactly what he's working with and how to use it.

Once again, he's heavy in my mouth. This time in a pleasurably aching way. His tip nudges the back of my throat, and I have to remind myself to relax and breathe through my nose as tears spring to my eyes. He swipes away a stray tear before it can fall.

"There you go, baby. Good."

He doesn't buck up into my throat, forcing me to gag and sputter as I try to accommodate his length — at least not this time. Topper just fists my hair and rocks slowly back and forth, eyes rolling as my throat clenches around him. My nose nearly digs into his pelvis by the time he's satisfied that his cock is nestled as far as it can get into the heat of my throat.

With the makeshift ponytail, Topper pulls almost all of the way out of my mouth before guiding himself back in. Each time the mushroomed tip kisses the back of my throat, he pulls his cock out of my mouth again. All it takes is a few good strokes before he's spilling into my mouth, moaning while I struggle to take him all. He pulls out when he's finished.

"Swallow," he instructs, tilting my jaw back so that I have but one option. Not that I would argue with him anyhow. I'm used to how he tastes, salty and strangely satisfying, His hot release slides down my throat. At first I would have wrinkled my nose at the thought of such a thing, but strangely, I've become accustomed to the taste. It's uniquely Topper, as odd as that sounds.

He helps me to my feet and plants another slow kiss to my swollen lips. I keen at the attention, my brain feeling sluggish and wishing he would just wrap his large hand around my throat again.

"I love you," he finally murmurs, pressing a find kiss to my forehead; a stark contrast to his manhandling moments before.

"Love you too."

Around us, the porch goes dark for a split second and I bolt into Topper's arms before the lights flicker back on. This repeats a few more times; long enough for us to realize that his dad is likely on the other side of the front door.

Topper groans. "Shit."

"Shit."

[jerseyshoresy]

I froth at the mouth over your fics!!!!!

May I please request something where some drunk asshole confronts the reader at MoDeans and hits the reader, then all of the LK crew starts coming over but reader just decks the cunt and lays him out. Wayne already guessing you'd be fine but everyone starts fussing asking questions and shit bur you're cool as a cucumber?

Okay so I'm OBSESSED with this idea of this because uh yeah anything with the LK crew at MoDean's is sure to be fun to write lol. And thank you SO much for your kind words, you're so sweet! I'm glad you like my writing and I'm honored you all trust me to bring your creative vision to life :) much love!! <3 <3

OH! ALSO! This isn't explicitly romantic because I wasn't sure if you were looking for more friendship or romance so it's implied Wayne x reader but it can be read either way tbh. Enjoy!

All Hands on Deck

Implied Wayne x gn!reader

Warnings: cussing, fighting, mention of blood, Gail being... Gail

Done was another long day of chore'n so you decided to hang out at MoDean's with your best friends, relieved to finally relax in good company. You greeted the group, all of whom already had drinks, and so you ordered yourself one, too, taking a seat at the bar next to Wayne.

"Y/n, how're you now?" he asked, his expression softening ever so slightly when you sat near him.

"Good, and you?"

"Not s' bad."

You smiled. "Glad to hear it."

Everyone was listening intently to Squirrely Dan, who was in the middle of a story about some guy and an ostrich--you weren't all too interested in the details-- so you took the time to peek around the bar, seeing who else from Letterkenny had shown up for the night. The regulars were there, naturally, as were some people you knew from high school. You even spied Jonesy and Reilly who had stopped flirting with women to flirt with each other. You shook your head, enjoying the stereotypical evening with the same people who were always around. Turning your head a little more to the left, though, and you almost choked on your drink. There was some guy you had never seen before, sitting at a table and downing beers like nobody's business.

"Who's that?" you asked Gail when she brought over your drink.

"Dunno," she replied, leaning in closer to you, "but he's from out of town. Heard he's from the city. Montreal."

"Really? Their downtown is pretty nice from what I've heard."

"I'd be happy to show him what a real nice downtown looks like," Gail groaned, gyrating her hips in a way that felt so dirty you had the urge to clean the countertop she was gripping seductively.

"Don't you have customers to serve?" you asked, earning a glare from the bartender.

"Don't you have a tab to pay?"

"Fair enough," you grumbled, taking a sip of your drink. You looked at the man one last time before turning back around in your seat. You were surprised someone from the big city would come all that way to be in Letterkenny, but it didn't matter to you. The guy was spending big money in alcohol consumption and singlehandedly keeping MoDean's in business for the next month, which was great for Gail and even better for you. You tuned into the conversation with your friends, wondering what the next topic at hand was.

"...and that's how I got cow spit in my eye," finished Daryl, earning looks of disgust amongst the group.

"How about you, y/n? How was your day?" inquired Katy.

"It was alright, nothing too interesting," you said. "The most exciting thing to happen to me was hearing some guy's here from Montreal."

Right as you said that, you accidentally made eye contact with the man from Quebec. You quickly averted your gaze, not wanting any trouble.

"So yeah, that's been my day. I'll be right back, I gotta go to the bathroom."

After you did your business, hands washed and dried, you starting making your way back over to your seat. All of a sudden, the screech of a chair being pulled out from under a table caught your attention and in no time, you were face to face with the stranger from the city.

"You got a staring problem?" he snarled, very obviously intoxicated with the way he was slurring his words. "You've been lookin' at me all night and I don' like it."

You went to reply angrily but you couldn't get any words out--the only thing in your mouth at that moment was a a drunk dude's fist. You staggered from the momentum of the swing, your face bleeding profusely, and your mind reeling from the audacity of this city dweller. You heard the chorused yells of the Letterkenny residents, all equally unhappy that the out of towner hurt one of their own. You knew your friends would be over any second to take care of the guy, you could see them running from your peripheral vision, but you wanted a piece of him first. Fueled by anger, you threw a power packed punch right back to the man. In an instant he was knocked out, his unsteady body crumpling to the floor.

"Holy shit, y/n, are you okay?" Katy asked, putting a hand on your back in a soothing manner. Daryl held a clean rag to your nose and mouth to stop the bleeding while Dan pulled out a chair and had you sit in it. You even saw some of the regulars take the man's unconscious body and throw it out behind the dumpster. Throughout the aftermath of the ordeal, though, you realized you never saw Wayne.

"Are you sures you're okays, y/n?" Squirrely Dan questioned.

You laughed. "I appreciate everyone's concern, but there's no reason to fuss. It was just one punch, I'll be fine. You guys go sit, enjoy your drinks. I'll be over in a minute."

They relented, taking in your condition one last time with worried looks before taking up their spots at the bar.

And now here came Wayne.

He stalked up to you, taking a swig of Puppers.

"Fuck, bud, you didn't even give him a chance." Another sip of beer. "I almost feel bad for the guy."

"Yeah," you sighed, "me too."

You enjoyed comfortable silence together for about a minute or so before Wayne spoke up again.

"You know, I didn't rush to your side because I knew you were okay. You're tough."

"I know." You met his eyes, the dingy lights of MoDean's doing nothing to dim their shining deep blue color. "Thanks."

Wayne was a man of little words, and you didn't feel like there were more words to be uttered anyway, but his look said it all. You spied the smallest hint of a smile on his lips as his head turned to the rest of your friends at the bar, already back to smiling and having a good time.

"Yeah," you answered, his question not needing to be asked out loud, "let's go have some fun."

[ranaissingle]

Lost On You

Masterlist Summary: The reader is at a bar and gets harassed by a drunk dude. Austin to the rescue

Rating: T Pairing: Austin Butler x Reader Word Count: 864 Warnings: Violence, cursing, misogyny, borderline assault, Austin being very hot. etc. A/N: Thank you for the request anon (I also accidentally deleted this request again don't kill me I have a slow computer🧍‍♀️) ! I've been so swamped with school it's not even funny lol so I hope I wasn't too late with this request. As always, Austin is looking hella fine in the photo above. Kaia gets to sleep next to him every night and I have never been more jealous of anyone in my life.

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You had been sitting at the bar for the last half hour nursing an overly sweet martini and flipping through social media on your phone. It was 8:30 on a Friday and you were all alone so trouble was practically guaranteed. You occupied the stool all the way in the corner of the bar to keep away from stray eyes. Unbeknownst to you, a man with shaggy blond hair and cerulean eyes had been eyeing you for well over an hour now.

You felt a figure walk up behind you and block the shadow of the light bulb above you. You turned around and before you could speak a word his slurred words came out in abandon.

"Hey baby~ I seen you sittin' all alone at this bar and I figured I could lend ya some company" His brown locks and shit-eating grin probably did wonders for the other girls he most likely hit on, but you weren't falling for it.

"Um no, I'm good. I'm not looking for anything tonight" You turned your head around to face the bar to hopefully reiterate how uninterested you were but before you could bring your drink up to take a sip the man behind you snatched it out of your hand.

"Did ya hear me, baby, I was asking if you wanted to spend some time together." His voice grew louder and more aggressive as he spoke. You turned around fully in your stool to face him. That was your first mistake.

"I told you I'm not interested in anything like that. Just leave me alone." You knew this wasn't going to end well. It never did. You couldn't even enjoy one single night out by yourself because some asshole always had to ruin it. Just as set your foot down on the floor to step away from his obnoxious voice and sour breath, he planted both arms on either side of you against the bar counter and leaned his head closer.

His beer-ridden smell stank up the space between you and you pushed on his shoulders to try and pry him off of you, but he doubled down on his invasion of your personal space and moved closer.

" What you gonna do little girl? I bet you're a whore under this shy facade you have going on. This is probably how you reel them in huh?"

"G-GET OFF OF ME" You kicked his shin and pushed harder but he wouldn't budge. He was laughing. He was laughing as you struggled under him and even chuckled at the kicks you gave him. He didn't budge and his horrific chuckles were ringing in your ears and making your blood burn. You needed him off now, you couldn't breathe, he was going to hurt you and you knew it, it's over, this is i-

"Hey asshat, didn't you hear the little lady? She said to get off." A smooth rich voice broke through your panic as the man placed his hand on the guy's shoulder and squeezed.

"What's it to you pal, me and her were just getting to know each other is all." The blond man was taller, broader, and just bigger overall. His eyes looked over your face and gave you a small smile before he shifted his gaze back to the brunette still hunched over you.

"I asked you nicely and you didn't move so I guess I'm gonna have to rephrase." At that, he yanked the brunette back away from you and you breathed out a sigh of relief at the loss of contact.

"Keep putting your hands on her, and I'll be forced to put my hands on you. Back. off." Your assaulter regained his footing and stepped back once he realized he was outclassed.

"Whatever dude," he shakes off the blonde's hand " She wasn't even a pretty piece of ass anyway I was just doing her a favor." The blond shoves the man's shoulder and watched him leave. His grumblings could be heard as he drunkenly walked all the way back to his seat.

Your savior turns to you with his hands in his pockets and smiles lightly " Are you doing alright? I'm sorry if I overstepped but that guy was starting to piss me off and I was tired of just watching." Your eyes widened at his last statement, he had been watching? He had to have been watching you long enough to see the interaction with the other guy, which begs the question; was he watching for longer?

"No you didn't overstep at all, I really appreciate your help I- I wasn't sure what was going to do so I'm glad you came." The relief on his face was evident as he raked his eyes over your form before quickly averting his gaze once more as a guilty look crossed his face.

"I'm glad that's the case I didn't want to give you a second problem on top of that asshole." You both laugh and he draws closer to you to sit on the stool next to you.

"I'm Austin by the way," he holds his hand out to shake yours, "what's yours?" Saying your name then, made you feel different than ever had before; it made you feel like you could get lost in him and those breathtaking cerulean eyes.

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This was a little short and a little shitty lol and everything I write makes me feel single but I hope you enjoyed it anyway, until next time!

[bananasfosterparent]

Hehehehe tell me more about consort efinity pleaseeeee

OH...OH no.. you--you don't know the size of the shipping container of worms you just busted open with this question lmao 😭😭😭

(Seriously, getting this ask had me kicking my feet and giggling during my mini vacation at a friend's lakehouse!! Thank you for having an interest in my babu 😭😭 it really means a lot to me.)

I have some posts about her general backstory in her tag but I am guessing you mean taking about Efenity as Astarion's Dark Consort specifically? So, I'll focus on that.

Plus it's not something I've delved into fully and on Tumblr yet lol I apologize for the length before I've even typed out this post lmao I wrote a lot under the cut, sorry 🫣

This song sums up nicely how Efenity is with becoming a Consort and how it makes her feel being his:

Catching My Breath (Cutmore Remix) - Kelly Clarkson

Also, I will mention a lot about her relationship with Astarion in general, and not just Efenity herself as his consort.

As Astarion's consort, Efenity can just be herself in full comfort. In truth Consort Efenity is cruel, unforgiving, uncaring, ruthless, and extremely selfish toward those who are not herself, Astarion or (despite their differences) Shadowheart. She is everything she's always been, but cranked up to 12. She's arrogant and puts all of her confidence in herself and her Lord (this only increases with time lol). On the surface (to charm normies), she is generous, considerate, warm, and charismatic. But like the weather she channels, people soon learn they are just in the eye of the storm.

Efenity is a simple woman. Despite how complicated her schemes can be, despite her elaborate manipulations and meticulously detailed plans for heists...really it's all for a simple concept: comfort, security, and security in comfort. Her main goal for most of her adult life has been to score a hit big enough that she can use the money she stole to purchase her own home (preferably in the upper city), fund her own criminal ring, live lavishly and alone. Once strong enough, she planned to usurp Ninefingers and be the new 'queen' in charge of the underbelly society. Without even being detected. She wanted to live large in her big home and throw parties for other nobles too drunk to notice they were getting their pockets emptied in her party rooms. And then fund her lifestyle by the criminal ring she would be secretly running.

So becoming Astarion's consort literally is her greatest dream come true.... plus the grandest dream she never even thought possible, of becoming the bride to a vampire lord.

---

I'm going to skip ahead to their 'comfortable' years, after the palace has been fully rebuilt and refurbished and they have returned from their leisure travels. I headcanon that it takes a very long time for Astarion to be comfortable with turning someone else into a spawn. And even then, he doesn't find actual pleasure in it, but sees it as business. It's on his terms and only those he personally deems worthy of it. While he talks a lot about making spawn at first in-game, he also admits (to Minthara) that the gift of immortality belongs to only him and his Consort. I feel like those are his true feelings.

But I like to think eventually, Efenity reminds him that they cannot run a palace by themselves, and they certainly cannot have living civilians working for them. His ghouls and werewolves--while great for a fight--are no use with pouring tea or cooking feasts, or changing silk bedsheets. They need servants. Vampire servants. Especially to dispose of bodies and clean up blood splatter without question. And just like that, Efenity's life becomes more than just being Astarion's lover and confidant. Now she had more responsibility, managing the lesser spawn.

----

Consort Efenity spends most of her time in two places: the main palace, and her underground study.

In the main palace, her duties as Lady of the Manor are:

Plan/host the parties she and Astarion throw for gathering intel and victims.

Charming targets at their parties to drill information, blackmail fodder, or gossip out of them covertly.

Make alliances or use philanthropic ventures to keep up appearances AND put people in debt to her and Astarion.

Emotionally keep Astarion in check.

Perhaps most importantly: lock the main doors (both physically and with an arcane lock) to keep victims from escaping and crafty heroes from entering.

In her study, her duties are:

Training the lesser spawn on using their vampiric powers (according to DnD lore, they probably have natural abilities automatically when they awaken but I hc they have to train to improve at them).

Combing through Astarion's side of the plans for inflitration or domination of different groups and parties, filling in the details and making the plans actually do-able.

Running the city's criminal guild. There are underground tunnels connecting the palace to her own guild. She ultimately plans to eliminate Ninefingers (and what's left of the current guild loyal to NF).

Overall, she's a cruel mistress who enjoys giving an inch to take a foot. She likes playing cat and mouse games with victims and being such a big woman, can easily drain them dry in moments. She and Astarion make a million plans and rarely do any of them actually work out, but they keep trying and she has fun with that.

---

But she and her Lord are not without their issues between them too.

She has lost a good amount of control over herself to vampirism. Being a woman of rich comforts and hedonism, these traits are amplified in vampirism and she easily falls victim to her own hunger and boodlust. Thankfully, Astarion is there to help her through it, but must keep her in check when she has episodes of feralness. Just as she emotionally helps him check himself, he helps bring her out of her hunger daze. I hc that he cannot actually compel her because she is legitimately his bride, so he has to employ other ways of bringing her back to herself. Effective, but rarely is it pretty.

Both of these things can be quite frustrating for both of them. They desire to maintain their twisted version of love, as--thanks to their Blood Bond--they emotionally and mentally depend on one another's joy and happiness to fully have their own. It's very co-dependent, but they are both happier that way.

As time continues, they become more powerful and Astarion is more and more possessive and protective of his bride. Likewise, Efenity becomes more and more obsessed with him and blinded by the greatness she sees in him. To her, he is like a god, her Lord who can do no wrong. Her Lord who has remade her entirely. No longer do they help put each other in check, but instead indulge in their desires to be feral and power hungry for one another. They see themselves as the most powerful and clever creatures in Faerun, and want to prove it together, against the world. Thus, begins their eventual downfall.

But it takes many, many, many decades and decades for them to get to that extreme.

[bananastarion]

I guess the weird thing about me is that often in my fantasies, things tend to go wrong instead of following some sort of ideal? Or maybe that's normal lol.

Like for example, I imagine post-ending Tav and Astarion getting to enjoy the night life a little and tavern hopping. Tav has taken on a nocturnal schedule to spend more quality time with their vampiric lover. As an aside, I envision a conversation between them at some point where Astarion feels bad that they have forsaken the sun when they don't have to, to which Tav responds "If I want to go out in the sun again, I will. But honestly, you are all the light I need in my life <3" Gosh I'm cheesy ok

I also have this (probably not DnD accurate) headcanon that vampires can catch a buzz off the alcohol content in blood, and in fact are acutely sensitive to it. So Tav gets drunk, and then they sneak out back so Astarion can get second hand drunk off their blood. You save a lot of money this way!

But one night, this all takes a turn for the worse. Astarion is drinking from Tav and they get caught by a drunk girl who had snuck into the same alley for a smoke. Instead of being frightened, she's curious about what they're doing and asks if he'll drink from her too. Normally this wouldn't happen, but Astarion is drunk and hungry, and impulsively decides to give her a nibble. The problem is, this girl was SCHWASTED, and possibly on some other things too.

You notice something's wrong as her blood kicks in, and decide it's time to go home. It doesn't take long before Astarion is drunker than you've ever seen him. Maybe more drunk than he's ever been in over 200 years. Normally he's a happy drunk, but at this point gradually he's becoming a weepy, sloppy mess. He expresses remorse about taking advantage of that drunk girl, that it reminds him of what he used to do and he feels disgusted by it. You agree that it wasn't right, and can't ever happen again. As you near where you're staying that night, he starts pouring his heart out to you, saying all the things he feels but is too restrained to express so sincerely normally. How in love he is with you, how he doesn't know what to do with himself, how scary and beautiful and overwhelming it is. How afraid he is, how happy he is, how he'd do anything for you. His confession is raw and confusing, but very sincere. In vino veritas.

It would almost be romantic, if not for the word vomit leading to actual vomit. Regular drunken puking is horrible, but when it's all blood... Gods, you're so glad he got that out of his system before you got inside. When you get to your room, you comfort him and make sure he's doing okay. At this point he's sleepy and incoherent, vacillating between asking you for a cuddle and asking you if he's a bad person. His voice is high, whiny and breathy, like it's taking a lot of energy just to talk. After babysitting him for a bit, you finally get to rest. He's got a wicked hangover the next morning, and is completely embarrassed about the night before and doesn't want to even address it. It puts you both off drinking for a while. But eventually, with time it becomes a night you get to tease him about mercilessly. And with even more time, the things he admitted to you that night come more easily, and without any alcohol needed in the equation.

[prongsmydeer]

Ayesha Liveblogs Hidden Agenda S1

I will not lie to you, I am watching this entirely for the fact it stars Tony from the Warp Effect

"I will get back my five minutes. When that time comes, I will let you know." Seems like an extreme overreaction to imply you want some sort of physical favour for missing a few minutes of studio time, but hey, I'm not a musician!

Much like Pat, I also feel like I've walked in the middle of something

LMAO @ the opening theme suggesting there's only one woman in this whole show, but I guess if I want women, I should choose a different genre

"As I've told you guys, I'll deal with the Nita situation my way." You know that post that's like 'I'm bisexual, by which I mean I'm physically terrified of dating men and emotionally terrified of dating women?' That's Zo

"Joke used to date Nita. Maybe he can help you out." Ah, I think we have arrived at the premise

I really want to know what's going on between these two because they are really acting like We Have A History:

Nita talking to a female classmate who is fully offscreen because she's the only woman on this show HAHAHA

"Why did you freak out like that?" said Pok, as if he had not jumped on a man holding a full cup of coffee

Not the debate club of the political science faculty!! This is far too relatable to my university experience LOL (also RUN Nita this is a terrible dating pool)

So far, mostly Joke's role has been to pop up out of nowhere to taunt Zo about being romantically inept, like a particularly Rude Flirtation Ghost

"I'm not sure, [Joke] might have a problem with me." If by 'problem' you mean a semi-hostile leetle crush, Zo, u right

Fellas, is it romantic to lean into ur crush and whisper in their ear that they have no spine?

[Taylor Swift voice] I think I've seen this film before:

I've said this before but: If your friends leave you alone at a bar while ur plastered, get new friends!!!

Awwww Joke taking the 5 minutes to clear up a misunderstanding with Zo is the first sincere thing he's done in this show

SCREAM why did you make one of the romantic leads punch the other? I know he's drunk but COME ON. WHO LIKES SOMEONE WHO PUNCHES THEM IN THE FACE FOR NO REAL REASON

At least he's apologizing right away???? What a bold first ep

Yes, I do know in Bad Buddy (also by GMMTV) they were starting with street brawls, but that's different, it was their faculities fighting, not like one guy doing it unsolicited

LMAO I can't believe the punch was a plot device to give Zo a reason to follow Joke around wanting forgiveness

"If you just leave it as it is, it won't heal quickly." It was ALSO a plot device for intricate rituals for touching the skin of other men

"Who said I don't like you?" "You repeatedly gave me harsh words during our freshman year." Ohhhhh so their history is that tweet with Joke not knowing how to deal with his crush and writing Zo a letter that says, 'get out of my school'

You know, I do enjoy the Share My Drink So We Can Start a Weird Dating Mentorship Pact. It's fun! It's like a blood ritual but for stupid bisexual guys. Or a marriage, take your pick

"I can't eat anything here, right?" Dkljdlkjdd is Zo just a very picky eater? Vietnamese food isn't even like a polar opposite to Thai food in my experience, it's still Southeast Asian cuisine?? Also I have definitely had fresh spring rolls from Thai restaurants LOL

"My peer mentor is the best!" For some reason, I did think Pok was older than Zo at first sight

The more time that Zo and Joke spend in the debate room, the more Zo's personality (a mild pain in the ass) makes sense

HHAHAHAHAH is Zo dream-sequencing about kissing him? I didn't think we'd get here so fast

Oh psych, it's Joke's dream sequence. That tracks, but my god, get it together Joke, this guy punched you like yesterday

"No, let's get something to eat." Joke said: If we stay in this debate room any longer I WILL kiss you, Zo, and then it'll be both of our problems

I like that they haven't done ANYTHING to talk about Nita all day. They're just hanging out hahahaha

"Why would you come [to my gig]? It's not the right place for practice." "You'll see." Colour me intrigued about Zo's plan

Joke alternating between singing scales and practicing debate intros is so me. I am so him

Joke's cousin laughing at him but cheering him on for debate while handing off the key card is the true family representation I need from these shows

Trin is also P'Dim from 2gether and Captain from the Warp Effect so this is really the first role I've seen Guy Sivakorn in that he's not at least a little nefarious

"This is your home turf. Trust me, you can do it, Joke." Awww I like that Zo is teaching debate techniques through a medium he feels more comfortable with, which is music performance

I like that Zo has also made himself designated driver! Always appreciate someone staunchly against drinking and driving

"I told you who my crush was." "You told me voluntarily. I didn't ask," said Joke, like he didn't eavesdrop on Zo in a bus and then accost him to confirm what he heard

"Why would you want to join this club? I don't get it at all." "I'll explain later." Will you Joke? Because every explanation for this situation makes you sound a little crazy. 1) I am helping a guy to date you, Nita, so I need to be in this club to make that work or, more honestly 2) I like a guy in this club, but he wants to date you, so I'm in this club to spend time with him, while hoping that I don't help him enough to date you

A relationship with a hidden agenda is such a broad topic for someone's first debate. Talk about school uniforms, or fracking, or a legitimate social issue. Also also also. Do they not have a structure for this debate? Where are the themes, the motions, the timed speeches. Even if Thai debate is different from the styles I know, there should still be a structure. Why they just rebutting ceaselessly back and forth? All this for a title reference. Which debate nerd signed off on this!!

"To me, a hidden agenda is a secret." You have to decide the definitions at the top of the debate, or else you can't have one!! Writers team, I'm sending you a passionate telegram

It is fun how Joke is always standing like, 6 inches from Zo's face at every opportunity and you can see Zo getting progressively more distracted each time

The English dialogue and PowerPoint caught me off guard:

Honestly, as bananas as this is, I feel like Joke really does have the opportunity to Build-A-Boyfriend here, which does tickle me

Zo every time Joke stands too close: Not now, gay thoughts!

"But if you never try new things, how will you know what suits you?" Like dating men, said Joke, in the subtext

I don't actually like Zo's white jacket, but I appreciate that all of these outings are giving him an opportunity for both new things and confidence-building

"Well, look at him. We might need an exorcism. He must be possessed." Pat absolutely losing it because his friend showed up slightly hotter than he was the day before:

"Your task is to plan a mock date with Nita. I'll be there to fine tune the details." "Wait a minute. So you're telIing me you'd play Nita, and I'd be... dating you." Oh, I love a mock date

Zo crashing his bike because he's too busy making eyes at Joke LMAOOOO

I LOVE the pottery painting date and Zo giggling because he tried to clean paint off Joke's face but he made it worse

If a man tried to order for me on a date, immediate red flag LOL

"Stay true to who you are on your first date." Every bit of advice that Joke gives is genuinely helpful

"Would you like to go on a date with me?" [Joke freezes and then leaves immediately] Truly a congratulations, you played yourself moment

Two dudes, standing in a library, 6 inches apart bc they are bi:

Reading someone your favourite book while sitting together in the library stacks IS emotionally intimate. Good job, Zo!

We interrupt this program to say: Hee hee

Zo, beelining for the bathroom: Something LGBT just happened to meeeeee

It only took Zo three episodes to realize that dating someone might lead to you being attracted to them, good for him!

Debate club members using school activities to trick people into a date really brings back some war flashbacks for me

"The portrayal of women is quite antiquated. If I were in Clytie's place, I wouldn't just wait. If someone doesn't want to be with you, they simply don't. The sun will never look at you. Isn't it better to look for someone who truly values you?" I love Nita

"First is passion. Second is intimacy. And third is commitment." I do enjoy a Romantic Realization montage

Zo said: The best way to deal with my newfound romantic feelings is to run away to Chiang Khan

Joke said: Great! I'll come with you. To which Zo said: That's not what I meant!!! U r not helping the crush crisis

LOL when they subtitled them bowing to the monk with "Vulnerable" did they mean "Venerable"?

I was wondering if Nu was a Thai honourific but upon googling it is a diminutive meaning "mouse" or, contextually somewhat like being someone you just met calling you baby

"When a person is sad, he needs some alone time." "Have you tried being someone else's company? It might be better than being on yotur own." Touché, Joke

I did not expect Jeng and Pok to already be dating. Points for surprise!

Awwwww Pok looks v nervous, is he worried about Zo finding out that he'd dating a man? Don't worry Pok, he's also kinda dating a man, in a very convoluted way

If there's one thing Joke will do, it is button not even HALF of his shirt. Tiddies out always. Respect

"But Pok and I are close. He's my peer mentee. Finding out like this feels off. Am I not trustworthy?" I really did think that Zo was stankfacing Pok for just crashing the date-cation, and not because he was concerned about not having known Pok was gay. Also babygirl, with greatest affection, it really isn't your business why or when someone comes out to you, or doesn't

"I just don't want to make anyone uncomfortable." Awww Zo

"Stop giving each other doe eyes." Zo and Joke have been CAUGHT and CALLED OUT hahaha

I am also Team Glass Floors Are Scary. I feel closer to Joke with every passing minute

Zo laughing while still helping Joke through his fear is my love language:

"The first photo Pok and I took together is in that wallet." Maybe I'm just from the age of digital cameras, but I feel like that is not what would stress me out about losing my wallet LOL

Joke trying to recreate the sunset for Zo. SWEET BOY

"When I look at you, you make people around you happy. They smile, and at ease. You bring a warm and comforting vibe with you." Joke comparing Zo to the sun!!!!! ROMANCE

"Aren't we all the protagonists of our own shows?" How meta

The tinkling of bells while Zo eats grilled rice for no reason. Beautiful sound editing

I love these guys talking to their friends about their concerns, both in Joke pointing out to Jeng that just because Pok is willing to be closeted for now, doesn't means he feels good about it, and Zo establishing that Pok doesn't need to talk about anything before he's ready, but Zo is there to help

"From your perspective, what kind of person am I?" Joke said: Do you like me? Check ☒ yes or ☐ no

"You should let yourself express your feelings sometimes." This is both good advice and a possible romantic segue, Joke can multi-task

"Do you think... if your heart races whenever you're around someone, does that mean you have feelings for that person?" Zo said: Do I like you? Check ☒ yes or ☐ no

Zo said: Actually, never mind, the answer is yes:

I really look forward to Zo trying to explain himself after this

"I wanted to know what you were doing, but you didn't answer me." Based on how this bus ride is going, I feel like they did not have a conversation about the kiss

"I'm sorry. But I think we should keep things the same between us." Zo said: I will NOT be elaborating on our kiss at this time xoxo, goodbye!

Replying, "Mom, I got a lot of snacks?" to "Did you go there alone?" is a MUCH more suspicious answer than saying you went with a friend (who you're kissing and dating and having feelings for, but I digress)

"Should I put water on it?" "No, that'll fill the room with smoke!" GHKJHGKJHGG Joke trying to help with the burning food but not having a clue what to do. Mood

WikiHow Article: What Do When Your Crush and Close Friend That You Kissed and Are Now Avoiding Like the Plague Shows Up in Your Dorm Room Wearing Matching Aprons with Your Mom

"If it's too hot, take it slow. Try these dishes, they aren't spicy." Oh how the food suggestions turntables

"I wasn't exaggerating. I genuinely think you're exceptional." Get you a man who hypes you up like Joke

Fellas, is it gay to hold hands and gaze deeply into your homie's eyes while doing the dishes?

"I don't know how I feel about you. And there's this whole thing with Nita. I don't want to say things that I might regret later. Can you give me a bit of time to figure it out?" COMMUNICATION

Joke karaokeing out his romantic woes. Me too, buddy

"Knowing how you feel might help him make a decision." Joke said: How dare you make an excellent point, Jeng

"When did you realize that you were into Jeng?" Awww, Zo is trying to sort out his feelings

One (1) kiss with Joke cured Zo of all his nervousness around Nita

Joke showing the debate club his goofy side just to make Zo smile

"I'm looking." "Where? You're only looking at my face." Truly these two sitting beside each other in debate club is a big hazard to their focus

"I want to love the toad. Does the toad love me?" Crazy lead-in to telling you have feelings for someone by comparing them to a frog. I am in love with Joke

It makes me happy how much Zo is a true debate nerd

"The topic for today is school uniforms: Pro or con?" I told you it was a classic!

"I felt bad about kissing you, avoiding you, and being the idiot I've been. Despite all that, you still helped me." Zo says: Stop being nice to me or I WILL fall in love with you

UNBELIEVABLE THAT ZO IS STILL ASKING JOKE IF HE (ZO) LIKES HIM (JOKE)

"I like you, Zo. I'll make you see that I really like you. I want to make you see that you like me too. Let me win you over." Roooomance

The most unrealistic thing that's happened in this series thus far is them pretending that this pillow looks at ALL like a sunflower. Could the props department not have at least found some felt and tried their best?

"I'm still in shock," said Zo, about Joke trying to win him over, as if he had not been the one who kissed Joke first bkjgjhgkjhg

"You guys don't seem all that surprised, especially you." Has Pat been pulling some shenanigans this whole time? He was the one who kept saying Zo should ask Joke for help

"What did you do as a kid?" "I stayed home, did homework, and went to tutoring classes." Nerd ❤️

Zo said: You must beat me at ten arcade games to earn emotional honesty on this date

And Joke replied: Let's do it baby, I love winning AND talking about our feelings

"Why are you forcing stuff on Zo? If he doesn't want to eat it, drop it." Honestly this is also how I'd react if someone was trying to make my friend eat food they didn't ask for, Kot. There's a fine line between expanding your horizons and ignoring someone's preferences

"Do you think it's right to pick a fight with Kot like that?" [Zo as the Spice Girls voice] If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends

"You can do what you want, but respect boundaries. As for the food, I know you meant well. You wanted me to try something new. But you need to understand that I don't like it. People don't like things they don't like." I'm glad Zo is establishing boundaries. We love a healthy heart-to-heart

"I know that you're in a bad mood. You're not ready to listen. Take some time to cool down. I believe you'll get what I'm trying to say." I just love the entire vibe of this conversation. The confidence, clarity, empathy, honesty. Go Zo!!!!

Ohhhhh, was Joke never dating Nita at all??? Just protecting her from this weirdo who leaves her haunting sticky notes

"After that, rumours about Nita and me started. I didn't bother clearing them." You know, now that I think about it, Joke never did say he dated Nita LOLLLLL

"You didn't really want Nita." Bold take, Joke, how are you gonna mansplain Zo's feelings

"I had feelings for you." HAHA Zo confessing to Nita in past tense

"Thank you for the feelings you had for me, even if they were just admiration." KJHGKJGH Zo said: Joke was right, I am not in love with you, you are simply the Zendaya of this school

God, this metaphor of Zo being the sun and Joke being a sunflower is getting to me. I LOVE SUNFLOWERS

"I'd be so lost without you," said Zo, after Joke simply handed him a glass of water HAHAHAH

"Just be yourself. Being you is more than enough." STOP THEY'RE SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!! You win this round, drunk punch debate show

Oh I do love their little hand holds. And Zo being the one to reach out:

"Yes, I am [single]. I can give you my Line ID." Jeng, how is Joke, who is not even officially dating Zo yet, better at turning people down than you, who has been with your boyfriend for like a year? Bananas behaviour

This show is capturing the very real sentiment of visiting a man's apartment and going, "Damn, you live like this?"

Zo taking food from Joke's chopsticks instead of getting his own because he wants to flirt. Hee hee

Lmao @ Zo looking surprised at Joke asking him how he feels about him as if that's not the natural progression from Zo saying he doesn't have feelings for Nita

Zo every time things become a little too romantic: I gotta go to the bathroom

It's fun that they have already slept in the same bed without even it being a big thing before but this time is different because they are Romantically Involved

"Why did you choose this place for our date?" Hee hee amusement park date. First official date!!

Joke saying he's not scared of the amusement park when he is in fact, very scared and motion sick, is very funny

I'm surprised it's taken this long to get to an Obviously Sponsored Segment. They lasted seven episodes!:

"I think... I think I like you." Awwwwww so Zo has liked guys before, it's just didn't work out with this guy Puen

Being dumped on a moving merry-go-round by a guy who was leading you on because Puen "just thought it'd be fun" is BRUTAL. No wonder Zo asks Joke if he's serious about them 14 times a day

"Maybe that's why I'm afraid to confess my feelings to anyone." True, this actually does add some context to Zo's interactions with both Nita and Joke

"You're just like my grandma," said Joke, which is both a delightful implication his grandmother also laughs at him for being a scaredy cat and a wild thing to say to your crush

They said: Fear not, if you are missing the kissing, we will offer you some JengPok kisses

Bold choice for them to choose to end this date with an introduction to Joke's grandma, but I suppose she was part of theme of the day

"Why is he wearing your shirt? Did you spend the night together?" Also a bold choice for in front of grandma

"I'll come over tomorrow for round two. I'm not backing down that easy." Zo said: Meet me in the ring, Joke's Grandma, I WILL make you love me

"Your partner has to be a fighter. It wouldn't last otherwise." Grandma said: I bully your future boyfriend as a litmus test for his strength of character. He passed!

"You need to step up your game, Joke. Because I'm kind of fond of this one." HAHAHA Grandma dunking on Joke for them not being together yet

Also, all of Grandma's outfits are INCREDIBLE

I repeat, if there's one thing that Joke will do, it's take his tits out at the first opportunity:

Awwww Zo helping Joke to "recharge his battery" by giving him a tighter hug

Fjkfhkjfhkfjh what's going on with Zo, passing out in his living room and getting nauseous over chicken? I mean, relatable, but what's up. Overworking or is he coming down with something specific?

Update from 1 minute later: Overworking, apparently

It's fun that we've progressed from pottery painting to making your own pottery and then painting it. It's symbolic. Also Zo putting a sunflower on his cup!!

"Honestly, I felt something for you too." Coffee Shop Carthasis ft. Puen the Ex-Situationship, perhaps?

"Are you planning any late-night funny business?" I think this Joke's way of saying, 'Please kiss me again'

Also I love that they just hold hands as they walk around now

"Thank you for coming into my life. Thank you for trying to win me over. No, I should say, thank you for being my boyfriend." AYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

HAHAHA Zo closing the door only to yank him in for a quick make-out and shove him back out again:

I feel like the anonymous breathy phone calls to Joke have to be the same guy who keeps sending Nita haunting sticky notes. He's an equal opportunity harrasser, I guess

Them hanging out in bed just to cuddle. I looooooove

[Pat as Joke] "Darling I, miss you." [Kot as Zo] "I do not want to go to class, Joke. I hate being away from you." Hahahaha Zo's friends pretending not to look at Joke and Zo while they flirt but then immediately reenacting their flirting as soon as Zo sits down. 10/10 friendship

Something I haven't really talked about in the past 8 eps but that has consistently been happening is that every time Zo is thinking very hard he kind of stares into space with his mouth slightly open like :o It is very awkward and endearing

NOT Zo making class friends with Poom the Stalker

Zo play-biting Joke's hands while he has his arm around him is also one of my love languages

Convenient of Poom to send an incredibly threatening message confirming that he was stalking Nita, Zo, and Joke at the exact time he would be at Zo's apartment

I know it's necessary to resolve the storyline but I would like them to get rid of Poom ASAP

Poom smashing their special date mugs >:( He is not only a gross, harassing stalker, but also just a run-of-the-mill douchebag

I'm glad Nita gets to see Poom (James) get his ass beat by Joke and then taken away in a police car

"Until you're ready, I can wait." [Zo immediately kisses him] Zo said: I've thought about it for ten seconds, and it turns out I'm ready now!

"How can a couple have a secret relationship that goes on and on?" Nine episodes in, Pok and Jeng are finally dealing with the festering romantic resentment of Jeng being so closeted he is actively leading on women

"Although you don't plan on dating her, you can't just go around acting like you're single." A really reasonable point, Joke

"I see a knot between your eyebrows." "You can be a masseuse." Meanwhile, Joke and Zo are in their sappy couple era, good for them:

Not Pat and Joke being caught shenanigan-ing about Zo. Eep!!!

I can understand why Zo is upset. If you found out that the moments that felt organic and meaningful to your relationship (impromptu trip to Chiang Khan, even Zo coming to Joke for help, all ochestrated via secret texts) were actually planned with one of your friends and your partner scheming to get you together, that would really make you take a pause and reevaluate

"You and I still have things to discuss." "Discuss what? Why am I out of the loop?" Kot being the only one who isn't In Trouble with Zo LOL

"How should I be feeling? My best friend pimping me out to you!" That's a rough but fair way to phrase it, Zo

I am also 100% on Zo's side here, he has, at best, been told many lies of omission, and at worst, had his feelings and boundaries disrespected by his loved ones, and he's given Joke so many opportunities to tell him. Joke minimizing is not helping, and it's kind of Zo to not immediately dump his ass

"During the debate tournament, you may get a topic that doesn't align with your beliefs." That's true, it's like 50-50 at any given time LOL

Also: If I were watching these debate interactions you best believe me and the besties are debriefing about the debationships

"Grilled Rice, tell me, what should I do?' Props to Joong for keeping a straight face

Yeah, Pat and Joke, Zo is mad at you for lying, but luring him into a mascot flash mob in his classroom with another lie with fix it

Also I didn't mention it but if for some reason you've gotten this far without seeing the show, Pat fell down the stairs after Zo caught him in the lie, that's why the furthest dog is on crutches:

"Zo is mad because you lied to him. But your apology is another lie? Enough already." THANK YOU KOT

I'm not even sure that at any point Joke has said, "I'm sorry," so my opinion is that he should, in this order, say: 1) I'm sorry for lying to you. It hurt you, I realize that now. It wasn't fair to you. 2) If you can, please tell me more so we can make sure all your concerns are heard. 3) What, if anything, can I do to start rebuilding trust? What do you need from me? Space, access to my messages, an explanation of how me and Pat know each other

"I know you understand me." "I know. I've been so understanding. Even though I'm not fine with it, I try to be." I actually like the B couple conflict much more than the main couple conflict, at least Pok and Jeng both have legitimate sides

"I was blind to how my selfishness hurt you. I need you in my life. I can't live without you. You are my everything. I promise I'll make this right. I will fix this for you. I'm sorry." Now THAT is an apology. 1) Say you're sorry 2) Acknowledge and address the concerns being raised and 3) Change your behaviour!

Jeng coming out to the football club to assure Pok he's serious about them. ❣️

"I was just helping Joke get close to you. When you started dating, I did nothing to influence either of you. But it was wrong to keep it from you, to go behind you back. I was supposed to be a friend you can trust. I'm really sorry, Zo." Pat also knows how to give an apology. 2 down, 1 to go!

"I'm really sorry. I've done you wrong all this time, but I never apologized. You don't have to forgive me for this. But I promise I won't lie to you or hide anything from you again. You may not believe me now, but I'll prove it to you. FINALLYYYYYY JOKE. IT TOOK YOU SO MANY TRIES

Gjkljgkgjlgk Zo gently informing him, 'Yeah stupid, I was waiting!'

"Absolutely no lip contact for a month." HAHAHA. Good for Zo. Also I give them a week

If we count play-kissing, it took them like 50 seconds

I appreciate whoever captioned ep 10, because not only did they caption the dialectical differences or accents from where Zo is from versus Bangkok, they also made sure those captions sit higher on the screen than the default English caption height, so you can see both without moving it. GOOD JOB!

"Zo, where are you? Why aren't you here at my house?" Hahaha Zo has earned his place in Joke's Grandma's Favourites (Joke is not included)

"You'll need fuel for an intensive tutoring session tonight." "Maybe ease up a touch?" Can confirm, this is a relatable Asian parent-child dynamic

"By the way, I've got a debate topic in mind for tonight. Childhood trauma from parental conflicts results in troubled adults." Wow, a little on the nose, but true, Mrs. Zo's Mum

None of these guys follow any structure when it comes to debate. Normally, you get a topic, you take a few minutes to prep your arguments, THEN you start arguing. You don't just automatically keep rebutting back and forth. How can Zo be expected to speak to his arguments after like less than 10 seconds of thought? Unreasonable!

"I can play [football] anywhere. It doesn't have to be that club." Maybe Jeng should go to Sarawat and Tine's school, where more than half of any given sports team is at least somewhat gay

Pok crying because he realizes being out makes Jeng's life a lot harder :'(

"One day you'll find that love will make the impossible possible. This too shall pass. It will." I'm glad Zo has a good relationship with his dad

It's a good thing that Zo likes Joke so much, or showing up out of the blue at his house could've gone over a lot more poorly

"Your parents seem chill." Famous last words, Joke, I tell ya

Also, I do appreciate how evident it is that Zo DOES want Joke here

If there's a trope I will never get tired of, it's sneaky hook-ups in your childhood home as adults. In practice, maybe a lil stressful. In fiction, VERY FUN

"Your mom's pretty intense, huh?" [Tonelessly] "Yeah, but I'm used to it." Oh, Zo, I know the voice of childhood trauma when I hear it

The fact that everything with Puen also made Zo's relationship with his mum worse. No wonder he plays things so close to the chest

"I get it completely. Your family and mine are not so different." That explains why Joke spends all of his time at his grandma's and not with his parents

"I've got your back from now on." Sometimes that's all you need. Empathy and back-up

"Happy birthday!" "You knew?" He went to see Zo because it was his birthday!! They are sooooooooooo

Also, Zo said: The kissing embargo does not count on birthdays

Woo for Zo getting debate club presidency for this year!!!

"What did he do that made you hate him?" "He's close with Trin!" Finally the weird tension between Former Debate Club President Wave and Bar Owner Trin is being addressed

"But we're pals! You can't have feelings for me." I know this is supposed to be an emotionally intense conversation but it reads SO funny in English:

Unbelievable!! You're telling me that Wave is made because HE started throwing punches in the dorms and got banned from debate tournament

"He cost me the competition!" "That's on you. You wouldn't have missed out if you hadn't thrown that punch." You tell him, Zo!

"Who said you could smooch my hand?" [Zo does a finger gun] "Took the liberty myself." Bi culture khgkjgh

Joke saying, "Then let's ramp up our international relations, shall we?" as a segue for sex is incredible. This series may not be for everyone, but it is for meeeeeeeeee

Not Joke's family trauma revealed as being left on read in the group chat

I do appreciate at the debate tournament they actually are (finally) following a motion, prep time and speech structure

Also. It's clear whoever wrote this scene has NEVER competed in a debate tournament because they are not talking fast enough or writing anything down

"Can you say in all honesty that your effort here is not a product of hard work?" Not to jump on Nita's argument specifically but this making a point about the individuals you're debating rather than their arguments is ad hominem fallacy and would not score well at a debate tournament. In this essay, I will—

It's SOOOO funny that they made Zo loving the sound of soda tabs a genuine characteristic so they could better integrate sponsors. I miss the Bad Buddy soda sponge bath

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH POLI SCI DEBATE CLUB!!!

Good for Nita for taking home the Finland prize. Regardless of substance, it was very well-delivered!

[Park, about Nita] "Look at our shining star! So gifted." [Zo nodding, looking at Nita] I think Zo is doing a very good job of not showing how much not getting the Best Speaker/study abroad scholarship has hurt his feelings

"You don't always have to put on a brave face, you know?" said Joke, to which Zo probably thought, 'You don't understand, putting on a brave face is all I have done my whole life, I don't know how to turn it off!'

It's funny that Park is a credited character in the intros but the only memorable dialogue he's had up until Episode 11 is asking Zo to dress up as a frog to surprise Nita

It makes a lot more sense now that I know it's Nita's birthday and they weren't just frog-surprising her for winning best speaker LOL

I do love the nonverbal communication of Joke raising his eyebrows like, 'You okay?' and Zo smiling and fixing his hair like 'No sweat'

"Saijai, Joke isn't here. Shall I call him?" "That's fine. He'll turn up." LMAO no one in this show tells ANYONE that they're coming. Zo's mum didn't when she visited Zo in Bangkok, Zo didn't when he went home, Joke didn't when he visited Zo at home, Joke's family hasn't when they're visiting him. WHY DOES NO ONE THINK THEY SHOULD SAY THEY'RE GONNA VISIT

"You can tell me." [Zo sighs, hesitating.] "Alright, if you're not ready to tell me, wait until you are, okay? Do what makes you feel good." This is good relationship communication

"My mom's never said she's proud of me. Not even once." Oh, Zo. Heartbreaking. Also same maybe? I don't know fhkjfhkjf

I really do think they are both handling this situation as well as possible

"Zo, what brought you here?" said Zo's mum, like his dad wasn't lying in a hospital bed right front of him

"Was it a kidney stone?" "Yes, indeed. But surgery these days is minimally invasive. They just insert a tool. It doesn't hurt much. An ingrown nail hurts even more." First of all. As a person who has had 'miminally invasive surgery' YOUR BODY DOES STILL HURT AFTERWARDS. Secondly, the thing that precipitates the surgery is usually a very painful medical emergency!!!!! That is why you go to the hospital. I haven't had a kidney stone but I know they can cause a ton of pain!!!! Thirdly, it's not YOUR body, Zo's mum, so shut up about it. This is like, incredibly rude dialogue. Villain behaviour. Meet me in the Denny's parking lot LOL

"Buzz the doc if it hurts, okay? Don't think you'll disturb him. Don't just hold it in." At least she is NOW acknowledging Zo's dad could be in pain. But good grief

"Zo, you know your dad was in pain for a long time. But he wouldn't tell me, wouldn't see the doctor." Why are so many dads this way jkhfkhf. But also, why then, were you dunking on him for being worried, Zo's mum!!!

I do actually understand why Zo's mum did not tell him mid-debate that his dad was in surgery. Would've been rough

Joke subtly telling Zo's mum he needs support without betraying Zo's confidence. Love that!

"You did such a great job today. You nailed your speech. I'm so proud of you." Awwwww, good for Zo and his mum

Fjfhjfkhf Joke missing out on his family trying to celebrate him because he's been too busy with his friends and supporting his boyfriend. How many of these problems would've been solved if they'd texted beforehand

"Joke, I need some alone time tonight. Just to process how I feel." We love a boyfriend who expresses his needs

Joke making faces to his BF to say goodbye and then continuing to make faces to himself for no reason is so me. Joke continues his streak of Niche Relatability

I do wish that Joke got to celebrate with his family, he needs family time too!

"Zo, your dad's got sepsis. He's in the ICU." THIS IS WHY I WAS SO MAD WHEN SHE WAS MINIMIZING THE EFFECTS OF SURGERY. THEY ARE SO SERIOUS!

Poor Zo and his mum though, this is the worst feeling

"You can count on me to be here for you in times like these. Remember, I'm your sunshine." Ohhhh I like that they've switched up the metaphor, they are both suns

In all this, I did forget about the random bunny animation voice-over that they started this show with LOL

What class is that voice-over even for? An elective?? It's been going on for months. They never explain!

"This 'under the weather' thing seems to hit you every year on this day." Is Joke's dad the emotional equivalent of Zo's mum, in that he is prone to bringing bone arsenic to his child whenever possible?

Dhkjhgkjghgkj Joke walking around his huge, beautiful house looking for his parents does give Poor Little Rich Boy

Also. They've not put Joke in a super reasonable position in either of these situations. Of course Joke's parents would be busy if they're planning Bachang's (I assume Joke's brother's) graduation, which is time-sensitive, as opposed to a college acceptance, which is often unpredictable and happens months ahead of time. Of course Zo may be a more absent partner if his dad is in the hospital with sepsis. Joke isn't making it their problem or anything, but it is a little bit lacking perspective to be upset that Other People Have Stuff Going On When You Want Them Around

"I think what you're feeling isn't physical, but mental." At least Jeng is here to help Joke talk it out

"Am I one of the things bothering you?" Shockingly emotionally perceptive of Zo's mum

"I feel like all that I've done means nothing." "Zo, you've got it all wrong. I've never set any expectations for you to follow." Zo's mum, you should read a wikipedia article on gaslighting, because you have done it multiple times, on screen

"I'm sorry for making you feel this way." That's a better response

"You're always enough. Winning that scholarship or not, success or failure, you're still you at the end, and you matter. Remember, you're the sun, always shining brightly on your own." "I'm sorry. But I need to be with my parents." It's funny, because Zo and Joke didn't actually do anything romantic in this hospital hallway, but I think this particular argument is the most emotionally intimate thing they could do while his mum was eavesdropping without them knowing kgjhgkjhghgj. Like, they didn't say anything about dating, but it screamed couple

She's gotta know they're dating now, right? She's gotta!

"What's going on between you and Joke?" That didn't take long. Also I love her little smile after she asks

"You might end up pushing Joke away, like you did to me." I take back my love, see u back in the parking lot, Zo's mum

"Something precious... Joke!" I'm glad Zo does see the value in his relationship. Also, now they ARE romancing in the hallway

"It's great... seeing you get your act together, finally." Joke's dad IS the same vibes as Zo's mum. Coming in hot with a backhanded compliment

"I stopped by your apartment and ran into Jeng. He said you might need a friend. So I'm here." Zo said: Uno reverse on the boyfriend drop-in family support visit. No one on this show knows how to use a phone 💖

"You don't need to cover for him. I know he's up to no good." What an insane thing to say to your son's friend upon first meeting him. He is monologuing on Joke's flaws. Joke's dad SUCKS.

"[Joke] may not be the golden boy you pictured, but to me, he's pretty much perfect." Zo said: You have actually chosen the extremely wrong audience, as I am President of the Joke Fan Club, and will reverse monologue on Joke's virtues

Get you a boyfriend who will therapize your dad at the dinner table

Also, do these wider shots suggest Joke has TWO brothers, neither of who have named as his brothers LMAO. This show really only utilizes its cast for drama

Zo and Joke really said to each other: Give me ten seconds, I will fix your relationship with your mean parent:

"If you've ever felt I didn't care for you, you're wrong. I love you just like your brothers." Oh, so they are his brothers!

The most realistic part of this show is all of the parents going, 'Actually, the emotional problems in our relationship are the fault of your own misconceptions.' 10/10, terrible and true parenting. Also Dad revealing it was middle child trauma all along LOL

"I've always been proud of you, son. Without fail, any given time. I'm so happy that you're my kid." Again, refer to what you JUST did moments ago, Joke's dad. But, better, I guess

"I'm sorry I pulled away for a bit. I was lost. I didn't know where to turn or what I wanted." I'm glad that Zo is acknowledging it. These two are all about talking through their feelings

"I love you, Joke." I like that Zo is initiating this 💞 They make lots of effort to balance the support and love

"I've never been shy about us, and I'm no longer scared." I really love Jeng and Pok's relationship arc

Jeng kissing Pok outside the party to show how much he means it and loves him!!

"But let's be honest, it's not the outfit that makes me look this good, it's all in the face." Hahaha Joke has never been lacking in self-confidence but I like how him voicing it shows he's back in a good emotional place

"But, you know, I was in a weird place back then. It's all good now." Me about myself every minute that's not the current one

"And honestly, you totally deserved it." We love a good sport!

Not them fully pausing the montage of their friends achieving their goals (beating video games, passing exams, rejoining football, going to Finland) to resolve the Wave and Trin conflict

"Kiss me, this time with the certainty we have in each other now." Oooh we love a full-circle post-uni kiss in Chiang Khan

"Well, my dream is a lot simpler now. Just being by your side like this, forever." ZOOOOO. STOP THAT'S SO SWEET 🥺💘

Final thoughts on this show: I would say the plot is somewhat meandering because it doesn't feel like it has one particular story to tell until the last few eps, and the use of their cast of characters could've been better, because I felt like people would only pop up to drop in a plot point. BUT I do find the show incredibly endearing!! I love the debate themes, I love how Zo is really focused on school, I love the silly little dating lessons. I think they do a particularly good job of building upon Zo slowly to help you understand who he is and why. I also liked the way they navigated the friends to lovers arc, though I could've done without the initial drunk punch or all the scheming. I don't feel like it added much, and I do think it took away from the relationship. I get that it's called, 'Hidden Agenda' but the mere fact that Joke liked Zo from the start fulfills that. The other part is that they laid some groundwork on why exactly their relationship was so tense in the beginning with flashbacks about the Freshy contest, but didn't really deliver on it beyond Joke appreciating that Zo asked how he felt. It felt like they didn't make much effort to reconcile the tone change or develop Joke's backstory in general. In any case, they had good chemistry, really good communication, a fun secondary couple, some really realistic parent dynamics and I liked it enough that I'm willing to hand-wave away its perceived flaws. A pretty solid mid-tier romance!

[planetknoxville]

You’re not my dad (Johnny Knoxville x Reader ft Bam)

Under 18 do not interact 

Notes: I've read every bit of Knoxville fanfiction there is so im going to have to write my own. I need this man out of my head, it's becoming a problem. The time its set is kinda around movie 2 or 3 or 4 idk who cares. It's not quite fluff, not quite smut, just a kinda fatherly Johnny because I'm a sick sick individual. I made up a character called jess she a dickhouse chick i guess just made her up cause i hate the Y/N thing lol

Warning: Blood, drinking, swearing, reckless mentally ill behavior, daddy kink if you squint,  etc

Please drink responsibly 

words 2400ish

----------------------------------------------------------------------

“Come on dipshit”

 I looked up to find Bam standing in front of me with a cooler in one hand and both of your skateboards in the other. I knew that cooler wasn't his and would have bet this month’s salary on it containing beers he'd stolen from catering that were meant for after filming had wrapped for today.

“A bit presumptuous that I’d want to hang out with you Brandon”, You said peering over the top of the trash magazine you’d been pretending to read. The day was going very slowly, as only a few people were actually on set and the ones that were here were absorbed in work you wanted absolutely nothing to do with. So, there you were lounging in a camp chair waiting for some dumb stunt that you knew was not happening today.

“Come onnnnn..” he whined, kicking you squarely in the shin.

“You’re a menace to society” you said through gritted teeth. Sighing in resignation you rose from your chair and immediately shoving him as hard as you could. He barely stumbled and looked back at me with disbelief, “ Is that all you’ve got Jess?”

We slipped behind the sea of large blue tents that shielded the expensive camera equipment and crew from the sun. We’d been filming in the paramount lot for two weeks now, there were several air conditioned warehouses but no, the holy trio of Jeff, Spike and Johnny had decided that outside in the boiling Los Angeles heat was far better. You began to think they were really pranking you with melanoma.

Filming was usually fun but there was a lot of waiting around. Get ready and wait, they always say. Bam and I were a lot alike, both liked skating and found it especially hard to do nothing or sit still so naturally, we became fast friends. In the first couple of days of mucking around we had found a few unused (hopefully) planks of wood, a large flat sheet of plywood, some milk crates and other assorted junk which we squirreled away and started building our very own skate park. It was precarious and constantly breaking but that was half the fun. It was tucked away in the corner of the giant concrete lot, our own private death trap. Just few bushes, a metal park bench with a plaque of remembrance for some executive that probably should be forgotten and the two dickheads dumb enough to fuck around and find out.

You both started throwing beers back like it was your job. If we couldn’t do our actual jobs then we had to put our talents to good use. Technically, it was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, birds were chirping away, and sweat was dripping down your face right into your eyes.

“Fucking hell”, you moaned, using your sleeve to mop your brow blinking rapidly as the salt made your vison blurry. “Take off your jacket, Numbnuts,” Bam shouted.

“It's part of the outfit dummy” you did a little turn.

“You look homeless Jess.”

 Unfortunately, it was kind of true. the black and white flannel you were wearing had more holes than you could count, the white crop was dangerously thin close to showing your nipple piercings and you'd patched up the knee of your jeans only last night. You'd done it drunk and after sticking yourself a few too many times declared it done and perfect. But you were afraid if you looked at it too close it would fall apart. The icing on the cake was the white bandana you had been wearing as a shitty ineffective mask to get past the covid police that was still tied around your neck. A plague neckerchief if you will.

"Fine" you slipped it off your shoulders. Bundling it up into a ball, you took aim throwing it at the metal bench but missed, landing it directly in the middle of a bush. “Good one” Bam sneered. You rolled your eyes behind your sunglasses, aware that he probably couldn't even see it, so you flipped him off to drive the point home.  

You heard the general chatter from inside the tent grow louder and the both of you froze, looking at each other in mild panic. It wasn’t necessarily a secret what you’d been doing, people generally knew where to find us but you weren’t super keen on having soul sucking executives know about the giant liability that the two of you had created (outside of the carefully planned stunts).

 “Shit” we both scrambled to throw our discarded beer bottles behind our friend The Bush.

Two men started walking around the tarps and into our janky club house. As they got closer, you both audibly relaxed. It was Spike and Johnny. “Calm down guys we’re not here to break up the party” Spike still looked annoyed “it’s not like we can go ahead anyway today”

Johnny touched him on the shoulder and said “bring the camera back here, one of these idiots is bound to eat shit" he looked over his stupid aviators at me, winking. “I’ll bet $100 it will be you Doll”.

My cheeks started to grow hot and not from the beer. How did he always know what to say, it took all your self-control not to turn and stare. Like most women alive you found him irresistible, but you were dealing with it by pretending he didn’t exist. The men continue to stand in the cool shade, chatting but also watching. You hated that. Please fuck off Knoxville let me look like shit in peace, you thought bitterly

We began skating again, trying to stick the landing of a ramp we'd built only the day before. You’d even “borrowed” the props department's power drill because Bam was moaning about going the extra mile. You took your run up and predictably the ramp bowed in middle causing you to bail half way through stumbling and tripping over your board. You could feel the four beers you’d sculled sloshing around in your stomach, cheering you on internally.  

Spike started to clap slowly, jeering sarcastic encouragement “You've almost got it”

 “It's looking like a really good doll” Johnny, not even trying to keep a straight face.

“This is not conducive to my success fossils” You got back on your board rolling over to the cooler. Johnny put a hand over his heart feigning emotional distress.

Cracking another beer, you saw Johnny raise an eyebrow. You'd think for a man with his history, he’d be a little cooler. “You want one Irving? You need to loosen up”.

Turning away from the death glare and back to Bam who was lining up for his turn.

 “That shit is wobblier than your ass,” you whined.

Bam laughed “You're leaning into it way too much”.

“Then you fucking do it” you shoved him as you passed continuing to circle the ramp draining your beer and throwing it into the bush. It missed hitting the side of the bench breaking into a million pieces.

“Jess!!!” a chorus rang out and I raised my hands in an admission of guilt. “Don't worry baby I'll clean it up”. Snatching up and popping the top off another beer, you made a show of putting it safely on the ground out of the way. You could feel Johnny's eyes burning right through as you and Bam began to giggle uncontrollably.

“You've got this right? I’m going home” Spike clapped Johnny on the back. “I will see you both tomorrow whether or not you’re hungover” he pointed his fingers at us. Simultaneously we both sprang to attention “Sir, yes Sir” arms raised in a salute. He walked away mumbling and rolling his eyes.

“Thank god”, you cheekily beamed, “because I'm drunk as fuck”. Bam grinned back “let's hang here for a while, I've got something special”. From his pocket he pulled a silver flask. Gleefully you grabbed it, downing a huge mouthful.

“Woahhhh” Johnny shouted “You need to take it fucking easy”.

“Alright precious” You handed the flask back reluctantly.

“Did you know I used to be a gymnast?” you shouted back, “Could put my legs behind my head”. Johnny's mouth fell open in what you didn’t know was shock or disapproval. Bam barked a laugh, half of his sip coming out his mouth, the other out his nose. You patted him on the back patronizingly as he doubled over coughing still laughing.

“I can still do some of the tricks”. You launched yourself forward in a cartwheel. “I used to be able to do this thing, we called it the Hawk Tony”.

 “Why?” Bam wheezed.

“Cause you skate upside down.”

 Lining up with the skateboard, you took a deep breath and let the liquor flood your body with electricity. You planted my hands directly in the middle of the grip, balancing carefully and flicking your legs up vertically. A pretty decent handstand you thought for a bitch ten years out of practice. You hear Johnny let out a low whistle “Why didn't I think of that”.

“Well well look at you go” Bam said “Can you move?” As if a handstand on a skateboard was not enough? “You bet” I balanced on one hand, using the other to push off the concrete. Balancing was a lot harder than you remember and you needed to push off several times, but you did a circle around the park, stood up with only the slightest wobble, then raised your hands in a proper dismount and bowed to the now clapping Bam and Johnny.

“Jess!!! Look at yourself” Bam shouted. Thinking my shoelace had come undone I glanced down only to see scarlet droplets raining down on the concrete. I pressed my fingers to my face as if to check for a nosebleed when I saw my hand.

A bloody gash with a shard of broken glass. Beer bottle glass. "If it isn’t the consequences of my own actions”. Johnny started walking over, Bam stood motionless with an unopened bottle in his hand.

“Seriously guys don't even worry it's not that bad” you looked over at Johnny and smiling like an idiot you took two bloody fingers and wiped it over your cheek like some kind of grotesque Eye Black that footballers wore.  You pulled the glass from your palm, undoing the bandana from around your neck and tying it around your hand, tightening it with your teeth.

Johnny reached his hands out for you, “Come here kid, let me look at it”. Very quickly and impulsively you chucked down your board and rode out of his grasp. “Are you shitting me, Jess? Come back here”.

“I'm fine, Mr Knoxville. It's just a scratch.” You teased. The alcohol had made you feel nothing but a warm confidence. Bam had unfrozen coming over to stand next to Johnny like two disapproving parents. “Seriously, dude. You're bleeding kinda a lot.” he said nervously.

“Oh no, someone is bleeding on the set of Jackass. What a tragedy. How will I ever survive??” You waved your hands around in the air dramatically, unaware of the blood slowly but surely dripping down your fingers. You continued skating around, deaf to their pleas to stop and come to the medical tent. You snagged another beer, this time using your teeth to open the bottle.

“You guys are being ridiculous, okay I’m fine” You downed most of the beer as a trophy for your misguided victory lap. Johnny turned to bam, whispered something to him. “What are you girls gossiping about?” You queried.

Bam nodded, got on his board and started skating around. Thinking he'd finally relaxed, you rode alongside him grinning. He was just a board length ahead of you when he sharply cut in front of you, and you had to abruptly stop, staggering sidewards. “Bam you fucking stupid cun...” Your stream of profanity cut off by legendary stuntman and actor Johnny Knoxville HOISTING you over one shoulder and hauling your bloody drunken ass towards the medic tent.

“Fucking put me down” you squeal wiggling desperately. This was the most mortifying thing you could have ever imagined, you’d rather drown in horse cum. You couldn't help noticing how effortlessly he carried you, like a ragdoll, he'd picked you up like you weighed nothing.

“Darlin, you should have come on your own when I gave you the chance”.

“Please put me down, I'll walk”. You whined now seeing the blood-soaked bandana, your head swimming from both the beer and being upside down. You could see the trail of red you’d left, staining the footpath and his white shirt where you were grasping at. He continued on his way ignoring your cries, leaving a bemused Bam to pour beer on the ground to wash away the literal crime scene you caused.

“Asshole You're not my dad”.

“Well, someone's gotta be, doll”, he drawled. God that accent, it pulsed straight to your core. You'd fantasized about him manhandling you sure but not like this. “PUT ME DOWN” you all but screamed at him. You pulled hard on his belt, hard enough to rip the stitches on his belt loops, leaving bloody smears on the white letters that spelled KNOXVILLE. You heard him hiss and then he slapped you hard, half on the butt, half on the top of your thighs. You were genuinely speechless. Humiliated and in increasingly more pain, tears filled your eyes and you finally stopped struggling.

“If I'd known spanking you would have gotten you to behave, I would have done it weeks ago” He chuckled, bending his knees slightly to enter the tent. He put you down on your feet with a shit eating grin plastered all over his smug, stupid, beautiful face. You stared at him blankly as his features blurred with the bright light they had illuminating the tent, your own head swimming and you could hear ringing. His strong muscular arms snaked out, grasping your shoulders as you swayed slightly forward, slumping your head against his chest.  “Baby it’s okay, Take it easy”. He held you gently and whispered the comforting words against the top of your hair as the confused but attentive medic pulled forward a stretch for him to lay you on. You moaned at the loss of contact, cringing internally that you’d made a sound like that out loud, but he held this small smile on his lips. He grabbed your other hand and murmured into the back of it “It’s okay,  I’ve got you”. As your head began clear, you started to sober up and the medic cleaned and dressed your wound, you looked over to see Johnny staring intently at you with a egotistical smirk plastered on his awful handsome face.

“What?” You groaned desperately trying to cover your face with your arm, but he held your fingers in a firm embrace. Forcing you to keep looking at him. How were you ever going to live this down.

“I guess you owe me that hundred bucks baby girl”.