#guess I'll get to fully capture that feeling in a bit!

[autumnalmind]

   I can’t wear all three of my bracelets- due to a sizing error (that’s getting corrected!)- but I’m wearing at least the silver, thin ones... It makes me really happy. Feels like a little peace of home is with me. ♡

    It’s a soothing kind of night, really...

[pedge-page]

Can we pls get more lactation kink !! No one writes them like you

Ask and you shall receive! I guess I'll just take the title of "Lactation kink" Queen 👑

Joel Miller x F!reader

Warnings: breastfeeding, Lactation kink, dry humping, frottage, first rough dom!joel then lil bit soft sub!Joel, premature ejaculation, little breeding kink at end

18+ ONLY

- - - -

Joel all but manhandled you across the living room. You can't even get out a greeting before he was groping you and slamming the door behind him shut. He throws you down on the couch, fingers digging into the cups of your tank top before roughly yanking down, tearing the fabric in two.

"Jesus, Joel!" You gasp. You go to cover yourself and your nude bra, but his claws  throw your arms back to your sides with bruising strength as he gets to his knees. His torso is positioned between your legs, caging you to the couch.

You feel the rumbles in his chest against your belly when he growls at the sight of your overly swollen breasts practically begging to be set free from your bra clasp. He pulls the wire frame down too, exposing your nipples as the fat of your tit droops over.

"Mine," he he snarls hungrily through clenched teeth.

His arms snake under your armpits, forearms flat against your back with his palms splayed over your shoulder blades, bringing you close to him until his warm mouth latches on to your sensitive nipple.

You gasp, immediately going to craddle his head.

He gets like this sometimes. Usually after watching you breastfeed your baby, or when he's had a rough day at work and all he can think about is escaping in your supple mounds.

Today is the latter.

He sucks around your pebble, tongue swirling to perk it up before the milk starts to flow into his wanting throat. You both groan together. Pressed so tightly against him, feeling all the aggression slowly dissipate from his body at the taste of your sweet milk.

He feels safe. He feels at home.

"That's it," you coo, fingers sifting through his locks as he closes his eyes and breathes deeply through his nose between each massive gulp. "Take your time. 'S all yours."

He usually starts with quick swallows before just letting your creamy liquid pool in his mouth for a bit then gulping a large load at a time. Little satisfied hums escape his throat with each encouragement of his appetite.  You would never deny him this, not that you think you could actively try with the grip he has. His callused hands slowly caressing along your back, rubbing you soothingly as he gets lost in your warm embrace.

He pulls away finally, stuttering a pant as a trickle of milk seeps from the corner of his mouth. You see the lust in his dreamy lidded eyes, his tongue darting along his lower pouty lip to capture any remaining taste.

"Better?" You ask gently. He rolls his head into your petting of his hair.

He just grunts. One hand grasps the bridge of your bra before he's tearing it from your body with inhuman strength and throwing it carelessly behind him, fully letting your plump girlies free.

He smirks at the sight, the heft of your bosom still bouncing. His tongue falls from his mouth, curling up to scoop your other sore tit into his mouth, teeth latching on the fattened part just gently enough to hold suction before he's suckling more milk again.

You both close your eyes and find calm.

Until the gentle rocking of Joels hips into the couch leg stirs you.

He pulls away and nuzzles his forehead in the valley of your mounds, glancing down at the weeping stain of  precum forming at the tent in his pants. He can smell your pussy from here, palm tracing along your inner thigh before his fingers part your panties and glide along your slick arousal.

You hope maybe hes going to take care of you, press his nose against your little beating swollen nub, but instead he withdraws and smears his sticky fingers over your tits, across your nipples, admirning the shine of your slick before licking the salty-sweet mixed taste of your pussy and milk from your soft skin.

Joel's arms hook under your ass and pulls you down to the floor with him, stradding his thighs with his cock pressed between your bellies.

You unzip his jeans and pull his hardened length out, tugging along the red tip with full strokes. "Ah-ahh-ahh baby," he whines, eyes closed as you pump him. "You feel--so good touchin' me."

He spits downward so his saliva falls to his tip, your hand immediately working the new lubricant down over his base then back up again.

His arms wrap around your waist once more, pulling you flush against him with his haggert breaths fanning on your chest. He sucks a few deep breaths before putting your pebbled nipple back in his mouth, grinding you against his body so he mushroom tip rubs right under your lower boobs.

You hump him, desperate to relieve the ache between your legs, but careful to not let your tits slip out of his mouth. With the secure grip he has on you, it doesn't seem likely anyway. You can feel his precum wetting your tummy and his shirt, moaning at the thick protrusion between you, twitching along your stomach, right where it would normally split you open and nestle deep inside where no other man had bred you before.

You want it inside. Want it filling you again and again. Spilling his seed safely into your waiting womb once more and giving new life.

"Daddy," you hum.

You feel his breath getting faster, k-9s sinking further as he ruts his hips along yours. "I want you to make me a mommy again."

His nails dig into your flesh, voraciously sucking reverently again, pulling you close, close, closer with desire to meld you into him and never leave. Mine, mine, mine, he chants in his mind: more more more.

I want you to put another baby in me".

His body seizes beneath you, and he can't stop his pathetic ragged painful moans, pulling away with milk spilling from his lips, eyes scrunched closed as his cock pulses thick ropes of his seed until its between your bodies and leaving a thick creamy sticky hot mess gluing you together.

You stare down at him as he gasps heavily.

"You're supposed to do that inside me."

But he's still so fucking GONE, coming down from the high of the intensity of his orgasm, of your milk still lingering in his taste buds. He just pants through his sinful lips, looking at you all drunk with no comprehension behind his wide blown eyes, unable to form coherent thoughts, let alone words.

- - - -

Permanent taglist:

@harriedandharassed @lola8888673 @its-nebuleuse @zliteraturehoe @merz-8 @joeldjarin @pascalscoffin @pedroshotwifey @ghostslillady @innerpersonunknown @missladym1981 @mrs-oharaxx @survivingandenduring @milla-frenchy @cockykookiee @fairytale07 @daddy-din @pedropascalsbbg @spookyxsam @somehopeatlast @millercontracting @pedrostories @mishala005 @theoraekenslover @animez96

[themusicsweetly]

Thank you for posting videos, pictures, and the Tribeca panel commentary on twitter. It is much appreciated. 🙏🏻

[ Anonymous #2 asked ]: Sarah, would you mind writing a S701 review since you were at the premiere last night? Don't mind spoilers and you can warn others if they don't want to read. Loved it when you did it before. Thanks!

Hello Anons! Thanks so much for both your asks! I hope you don't mind me combining both your asks.

You're so welcome, Anon #1! I so glad so many people enjoyed my posts about it! I'm very grateful that I've been able to go to these events for several years now. I know that so many of you don't get that opportunity, so I try to do what I can to bring it to you all even if only virtually. Things are always so much more fun when they're shared, anyway. After all, that's what fandom should be about! 💜

For anyone who missed it, you can check out my Twitter page for my full coverage of 92Y and the Tribeca Festival. But here's some GIF spam from my favorite of the videos I was able to capture this week!

Anon #2, yes of course I'll write up a summary of my thoughts. I know you said you don't mind them, but I will try my very best to not include any spoilers in it as I know it really does ruin it for some. But just in case:

~~~POSSIBLE SPOILERS FOR OUTLANDER 7x01 BELOW~~~ ~~~SERIOUSLY, DON’T @ ME THAT I DIDN’T WARN YOU~~~

Outlander 7x01, "A Life Well Lost"

As Caitriona + Sam have mentioned previously in interviews, 7x01 picks up right where 6x08 left off. No time jump or anything, which I was really glad for. The opening scene was SHOCKING and used something that I thought was really clever and really rude all at the same time lol. I can tell you that the audience gasped because of it. I feel this bit was extremely effectively done. Caitriona's micro-expressions really made it for me.

One thing that surprised me — and perhaps it shouldn't simply because Outlander has always been full of this — was that there were so many small moments of humor in this episode, despite the obvious dire situation Claire and Jamie are in (but really, when aren't they lol). There's a new small side character that both Claire and Jamie get to interact with that provides much needed comedic breaks. Even Jamie's menacing looks add to this. Claire especially, I feel, gets to use her biting wit (or just straight up cursing) to add some humor to the tenseness. There's one particularly funny scene that takes place on a boat and involves an interrupting officer that I so loved! The entire audience burst out laughing when we saw it.

While Caitriona + Sam were obviously amazing, I'll say the surprising standout actor in this episode wasn't them. I won't say who, but it's someone we're well acquainted with. There are moments straight out of the book that this actor just fully nails. We're so lucky to have such strong actors filling these side character roles and s/he is just fantastic. Their sincerity and conviction sold me completely.

As book readers can probably guess from the title and from where we are in the timeline, we know basically what will happen in this episode — and they to stick pretty well to it. Even so, it is still so satisfying to get to see it played out on screen. Claire's despair, hope, and heartbreak. Jamie's torment, anger, and determination. The relief of it all. It's all played so, so well across Caitriona + Sam's faces and in their line delivery. Sam said during the Tribeca panel that Jamie is perhaps "more frail" in this episode, and I think that can be said for both of them. Despite them being well versed in separation, I think every subsequent one after their 20 year split wears on them more and more. And they both play that so expertly, making the time that we do see them together just that much sweeter. I don't think it's too spoilery to say that yes, they do share several scenes together this episode so dinna fash!

As for Brianna and R*ger, their scenes are pretty well separate from the Jamie x Claire scenes. I don't really have much to say about them, except that they move certain other storylines that will become more important later on in the season forward. And only just so. While it was important to do so, honestly it felt a bit filler-like. That said, I am actually pretty excited for certain arcs for Brianna and Jemmy later on (while also hoping they don't include that storyline for R*ger... sorry, not sorry) and this brought them maybe half a step closer to it.

Other than the moment on the boat I had mentioned earlier, there are two scenes toward the end which I really loved. One was such a sweet moment straight out of the book with some really great book lines that I had very much wanted to hear. it is Classic™ Jamie x Claire, so you know Caitriona + Sam knocked it out of the park. The second is not a book scene (I believe?? I don't remember it anyway), but was a great one for Sam / Jamie. It's how the episode ends and I told a new friend I had met in the Tribeca line that the final moment of the episode reminded me of Batman's cape swooshing over the camera turning everything black. Lol take from that what you will!

Some other random thoughts:

Jamie x Claire are SO. SOFT. They say separation makes the heart grow fonder? Really, it makes those two grandparents softer AND I LOVE IT.

I LOVED seeing Caitriona + Sam's names appear as Executive Producers! The entire audience was singing along to The Skye Boat song and then burst out cheering when that came up.

I really hope Major MacDonald's wig gets snatched by Adso at some point because F him lol

Overall, I'd say I enjoyed the episode. Some might say it's a bit slow, which I wouldn't disagree with. But knowing that 1) they had to get this part over with the tie up the Season 6 cliffhanger; and 2) this is really going to be a jam packed season of action and emotion, I think I'm okay with that. I've heard it from more than one source that 7x02 is even better than 7x01 so I'm really excited! I'm also really excited to meet our newer cast members, as none of them featured in the premiere episode. The Hunters especially will be so much fun to watch!

Hearing Caitriona + Sam speak about not only this season, but their journey with Outlander overall makes me so grateful that the quality is still there after seven seasons. They're clearly still so passionate about these characters and are determined to do them justice in every way to the very end. And I think that most definitely shows up in their scenes. I'm super curious to see if there's anything noticeably different or better now that they've been promoted to Executive Producers. And of course, to see Caitriona's first foray into directing!! Until then, I'm looking forward to you all seeing the first episode for yourselves 💜

[kouyou-arc-when]

Theory on Fyodor's ability: Crime and Punishment

With the latest chapter, I can sort of imagine like 30 theories about what Fyodor's deal could be. Honestly, there are so many hints scattered way back from Untold Origins until now about the large-scale world-building of Bungou Stray dogs that we can imagine all sorts of possibilities for a person like Fyodor. I'll attempt to entertain one of them (this is not my only theory). In my opinion, it is clear he has a power that allows him to "endure" for long periods in one shape or another. That could be resurrection, reincarnation, regeneration, life force related power..- I guess the easiest way to describe it is an ability that helps him stick around. Right now Fyodor appears immortal, but I want to theorize on different aspects of what we know about him. These are key elements I want to focus on for my theory - they helped me narrow down certain options. I feel like the solution to the puzzle is figuring out how one ability can allow him to kill people and remain alive for long periods of time. 1. Fyodor's health, lifespan, and care for personal security: From what we've been able to gather, it seems Fyodor was alive in the 15th century, based on certain references from the latest chapter. However, there is an interesting aspect to his character: He cares very little for his physical safety - he gets intentionally captured all the time. We know this to be true from the time he got caught by PM, and there are theories he also ended up in Mersault partially because he wanted to be there. Within the latest chapter, he appears to have been captured by Bram's people on purpose once more. Furthermore, he tells Ace that he is prepared and "trained" to endure starvation.

This isn't the only time he gets in harm's way - arguably the entirety of Dead Apple was him putting himself at risk. Even so, while he MAY be immortal, and he puts himself in danger of losing his life, he is very sensitive about his health. In one databook, he mentions that his number 1 weakness is specifically his weak, sickly constitution. It seems getting ill is so upsetting to him that even if he survives a difficult endeavor like getting drowned, it's something he "isn't able to afford". Fyodor mentions this when he tries to drown Sigma and Dazai. He is anemic and hates getting sick/needs to be very careful about his health, every cover is drawn to show his dark circles and pale skin, Fyodor even admires good complexions on other people because his isn't that great according to databooks. This is a huge part of his character, and whenever we see additional material about Fyodor, there is 50% chance it's about his health issues (even for DA side material, the joke was he can't do much on weekends because his doctor told him to be careful about his blood pressure, according to one bit). What could this tell us about him? Fyodor constantly complains about getting ill: if he can regenerate ultra fast, this typically wouldn't be a problem. He says getting sick would be "intolerable for him". Ultimately, in a logical setting, an immune system largely allows a person to "regenerate" and many sickly people have a reduced capacity of doing this. Fyodor being able to regenerate super fast doesn't make a ton of sense. It is perhaps possible that Fyodor can regenerate large chunks of damage, but then his body enters a state of "suspension" which is why he's sickly - however, this doesn't fully track with the rest of what his abilities can do. I believe the biggest issue with Crime and Punishment is figuring out how the same ability that can kill others also allows him to live a long life (assuming this is all one ability). To continue examining this aspect of Fyodor, the wounds on his hand from his tick of finger biting don't seem to regenerate any faster than regular?

Harukawa is not overly consistent with any of this, just like most mangaka, and we don't see Fyodor biting his hands much later down the line, but there are a couple of times when it seems she's drawing him with wounds and scars on his arm.

I can remember like 2-3 other panels that show a lot of mini-scars, but manga artists tend to not be consistent with this level of detail. Hands are hard to draw af.

2. Bleeding I am pretty sure Fyodor's ability has to do with blood. I always theorized that he murders people by sacrificing some of his own blood, leading him to be anemic - there is very specific bleeding imagery whenever he kills people, and they usually die from bleeding out. I thought that was his "punishment" for committing a crime.

How would this work into immortality? In Christianity, life is heavily related to blood. You'll hear phrases like "Blood of the covenant", "blood of a lamb", and "sacrificial blood". Every person he kills "bleeds" out, yet he is anemic? Seems too random for it to be unrelated. So, what do we know? 1) He was alive in one way or shape in the 15th century, those are his memories, implying he, as a soul, has existed for over 600 years. He is long-lived. 2) Fyodor appears to be relatively unconcerned with dying, but appears to be worried about getting sick? 3) Fyodor himself says that being ill is his biggest weakness. It's canon he is anemic, and his health never gets better. 4) His scar from getting slashed by Bram healed since then, since there is no scar right now.

5) The wounds on his fingers don't heal super fast, meaning he likely doesn't have hyper regeneration. Being so sickly implies he doesn't have pure regeneration as well (from a logical point of view, but I suppose in a fictional setting it could make sense depending on how sensitive Asagiri is to detail). If he had regeneration, even to a baseline of his regular sickly self, he wouldn't say getting sick was "intolerable" for him, in my opinion. Fyodor isn't dramatic to complain about shit that doesn't get to him - he's alright with starvation and getting beaten. This sounds like he's afraid of more permanent damage (as an immune-compromised person, I can relate) If he got much sicker, he'd return to his old self eventually if he could regenerate, and he wouldn't have to worry that much. It is more likely he has something like complete resurrection from a state of being dead, rather than being able to regenerate over time. That follows what we already know. 6) His ability is connected to blood - making others bleed, and he himself being anemic. Blood in Christianity is associated with life. Does he have some form of life force manipulation? How does all of this come together? He is old af - meaning there is something up there. How could the above connect with immortality? A super sickly immortal? Why is he so sickly if he could regenerate? How would the same power that helps him live long also help him kill people?

I think it's possible that whatever he does with his abilities wears him out, and he has to change to another body eventually. Possibilities: 1) Killing people makes him sacrifice blood, so he gets sicker, until he dies. 2) Whenever he dies, it takes him a while to come back, so he can't afford to get sick and miss out on plans. However, if he has to die, it's still not a big deal if the reward is worth it, especially since he can come back, and others cannot. 3) Purely dying and reviving is easier than just switching to another body from sickly decay. The guy seems to panic more about getting sick than getting killed. Meaning he possibly has "periods" between resurrection/reincarnation/reviving. Perhaps he needs to die to revive into full health.

I guess it's possible that Fyodor's ability is related to life force itself? But how does that relate to the Crime and Punishment aspect?

Right now, I'd like to theorize that Fyodor's ability is essentially to "possess" people like a demon. Stay with me here. I'll try to explain what I mean by this: Fyodor can "possess" bodies. If he possesses them the right way, he takes over them and "rewrites them" to become him, including the physical appearance, which is why he looks the same throughout centuries. If he possesses them "wrongly", they die. The "crime/sin" is taking the body of another person - this is a profound violation in many religious teachings. "Possession" is a sin. Being able to possess bodies is one of the main trademarks of a Demon, which is how Fyodor is always nicknamed. Before he dies, he can change bodies.

I guess the easiest theory for me to imagine is that Fyodor is just a consciousness at this point, and he needs to "possess" bodies to keep living. Every single body he possesses occasionally wears down (this is the "punishment" part of his power), and he needs to keep finding new ones to keep living. Killing people wears down his current body even faster. Every time Fyodor "possesses" a new person he completely returns to his "baseline" form, and that is why he has no "old" scars from the 15th century. I assume finding a good body to possess may be more difficult, so that is why he avoids wearing down the current body with his power. Perhaps he starts killing his current host to possess another? And that is why he starts losing blood, making him anemic. The trick is that he doesn't finish the process. The reason Sigma was "brought into the world" was for Fyodor to have another "clean" body to possess. Asagiri even mentioned that Sigma was created in relation to specifically Fyodor's color pattern. Additionally, Asagiri told us to pay attention to "Chekhov's gun" cliffhangers, and this is one of the elements of the story we never got a resolution for - why was Sigma brought into this world, and why was he specifically made in relation to Fyodor's character? Having a body created by the Book, as a clean slate, may be perfect for Fyodor. Perhaps he cannot fully recover anymore from his broken health, even when he "reforms" after possessing someone, and that is why getting sick is worse for him than death - every time he "possesses someone" and takes their body, his body recovers less and less. Now, I want to elaborate on this. Why did Crime and Punishment not attack Fyodor in the mist? I guess one possibility is that Fyodor is a sentient ability. An ability that keeps possessing people.

Fyodor's ability won't attack him, because it is the consciousness controlling the body. "Crime and Punishment are close acquaintances, the borders between us vanish"

His fake speech to Sigma might be based on "half-truths" I have a theory that Fyodor's power ultimately synthesized with his real personality and became one indistinguishable whole. "The borders between us vanish" could possibly be a reference of the border between him and his power disappearing and leaving him corrupted. In my opinion, this would also explain why Fyodor wants to get rid of abilities - he wants to remove this curse from himself. While the ability may have conjoined with the real Fyodor, it still may be lost in how to act, and the real him continues being the root of all his desires. Dostoevsky's character was based on a chapter from Brother Karamazov where Vanya talks with the Devil - I feel like this is a huge hint to his character and the possible "possessive" part of his ability. Did human Fyodor summon a devil and had it become his power? Are abilities demons? Honestly, there are so many ways to interpret what we're seeing in BSD at the moment. I find it interesting that Fyodor wanted to see Bram and his "evil"

I think Fyodor may be fascinated with the existence of "good" and "evil" as equals - and is possibly fascinated by why "someone like him" exists. Why would God create an ultimately "evil" ability? And what about others who were born with evil powers such as Bram? They are just like Fyodor, which is why he relates to him. I feel like there is a lot of discussion to be had about the possible origins of abilities - the religious imagery, decay of angel themes, Nephilim theories, but I will leave this for another post. Also, I could write pages about Fyodor's ability, backstory and how it may be influencing his world view. I sort of have two theories in my head: Fyodor is a demon, or Fyodor is a human who was influenced by his "demonic" ability. I wrote this in a rush, so it's not well thought out at all, just a bunch of rambling, so thanks for reading again <333

[neonghostcat]

Brain Overflow

You know how in my last 'state of the author' post I said I could feel the urge to write coming back?

Oh, it has.

It's terribly inconvenient too. I'm going to tell you a little about some of the things I've been thinking of and then whine/wibble a tiny bit if you click through to behind the cut. (You don't have to read the last bit!)

I've written down three different SVSSS (LiuShen) ideas in the last couple of weeks, added a few thoughts to older ideas, made a mental note of possible Cultivate extras, and just refused to write down others so as not to encourage rampant plot bunny breeding.

But let me tell you about a few of them because I'm hoping it reduces the urge to work on them better than just typing up notes.

The Lady Blackbird fusion Not sure what Lady Blackbird is? Well, it's a free tabletop rpg that you can download here. But the TL;DR is, "Sort of like steampunk Star Wars: A New Hope + Firefly + potential Jane Austen novel, if you want." I'll just C&P the pitch here: Lady Blackbird is an Imperial noble fleeing from an arranged marriage to be with her secret lover, the pirate king Uriah Flint. To reunite with him, she has hired a notorious smuggler and the crew of his skyship, The Owl. However, The Owl has been captured by an Imperial cruiser. How will Lady Blackbird and the others escape? What dangers lie in their path on the way to the pirate king’s lair? Can you see where this is going? (Actually, probably not your first thought, no.) We start with Shen Yuan transmigrated in a xianxia-by-way-of-steampunk gown, sitting in a jail cell with several men, a teenage boy, and a veiled teenage girl. System helpfully informs him that he is now "Lady" Blackbird, on the run to end up in the arms of Pirate King Mobei-Jun. His cell-mates are, as follows: Smuggler Captain Liu Qingge, Lady Blackbird's personal bodyguard Liu Mingyan who suggested her brother when LB said she wanted to escape, the ship's mechanic Shang Qinghua, the ship's doctor Mu Qingfang (or they pick him up later, I haven't decided), and "a goblin named BingBing". While SY is busy freaking out that System can't fool him - that's the Protagonist, Luo Binghe!!! wtf!!! System says "later, loser" and more-or-less abandons him (though still employing an OOC ban). So now you can probably see where this is going, lol. It involves at least a brief period where SY has to crossdress and pretend to be one of Binghe's future wives - a fiancée/wife of Mobei-Jun as Liu Qingge gets very conflicted feelings about his troublesome passenger. Featuring lots of Cumplane friendship, sassy MQF (as a treat), teenage smirking (likely aided and abetted by the adults), and space whales (naturally). I have not yet fully decided if the story Shen Yuan read was PIDW and now he has to figure out how the infiltration of "space with gears on it" into his xianxia has fucked up what he and Airplane know, or if the story was something like "Proud Immortal Starlit Way" and it was always like that. (Thoughts?) ---

The "SY Bodysnatches MQF" idea What it says on the tin... SY accidentally ends up in MQF's body instead of SQQ's. Only MQF isn't gone - he remains. This occurs directly before the Demonic Invasion and double qi deviation part of the plot and they rush back to the sect to deal with that. Then things get messy while they conspire to get SY his own body. Featuring: An extremely confused Liu Qingge, eventual Shenbros, and aro-ace MQF being very bemused at all times. ---

The "LQG Gets De-Aged/Age-Regressed" idea As you can guess: LQG gets age-regressed. This happens in Lingxi Caves instead of his death-by-deviation. He latches onto SY-SQQ and SY-SQQ is helpless to do anything but take the cute kid in. Featuring: BingLiu friendship, possibly Bing-other disciples friendship, but mostly establishing bro-code that makes Binghe switch his infatuation with SY-SQQ into family feelings as soon as LQG regains his adult body and it becomes clear that LiuShen is happening. ----

This is along with: Joint Custody (LiuShen), my SJ-SQQ second-chance redemption fic (LiuShen and LiuJiu, but different LQGs), a peak lords ascension fic using Cultivate's backstory (LiuJiu), a LiuShen timeloop fic, and at least another half a dozen fic ideas sitting in the hopper that aren't nearly as developed/that I am not burning to write yet.

I'd love to know which ideas you guys are most interested in. ;) Joint Custody is still next regardless and I'll probably not be working on either of the LiuJiu fics in the near future because they are definitely 100k+ territory and I'm still not ready for that. But knowing people are hype for something keeps me hype. ;3

I'll probably be in this fandom awhile, y'all. Please send help.

Sadly, I can't work on any of them yet, because I have over 2,600 messages in my inbox waiting for me to respond to. (This is not a humble brag - this is thousand-yard-stare territory. It was somewhere over 3000 for awhile until I started making a list of people who generally only left emojis or thanks and let them know that I was going to just thank them for all of them in one email so they didn't peppered by replies in kind.)

Not that I'm complaining about them, because I missed replying to comments so much (it's genuinely one of my favorite parts about writing fanfic), but it's still a lot and even if I could manage 100 replies a day (which for mental health reasons, I really can't), it's going to take awhile.

RIP.

More importantly - I hope you are well! 🌼

[katebishopfan]

Sleepy Girl (E.O)

Summary: Y/n is filming Age of Ultron alongside Lizzie and the cast, for some reason she can't stop falling asleep on her (secret) girlfriend.

Sorry this is so short but I didn't have too much to write about since it was such a cute, simple, fluffy plot!

Lizzie POV

I stretch my arms out, blinking the sleep from my eyes, and roll to face my girlfriend. Her y/h/c hair is splayed across the pillows and I watch her lips part as she breathes in and out, still off in dreamland. I turn and grab my phone, wanting to check the time so I know how long I can let her sleep in. It's nearly 8 a.m., the time she needs to be up. I sigh and glance between her and the time.

Maybe I should just let her sleep in? I know she hasn't been sleeping well lately and between filming, running lines, and in her case a LOT of stunts I know how tired she is. At the same time though, I know if she wakes up late she'll be stressed and the last thing I want to do is make her even more stressed than she already is.

"Y/n, baby, it's time to wake up," I whisper softly, my hands reaching out to caress her cheeks. She lets out a small whine and rolls away from me. A smile curves upon my lips and I can't help but feel a little bit giddy at the fact that she's my girlfriend. Mine.

We've only been dating for a little over a month now but it still feels so fresh. Even though I feel like I'm already in love with her, but I guess that's lesbians for you. "Darling, it's time to wake up. It's 8 am." I try again, gently rolling her body to face me and moving her head onto my lap. Her eyelids flutter and she sleepily opens her eyes, looking up at me.

"Mmm, you're so comfy," She mumbles drowsily, her arms reaching out to capture my body. I pull her up fully onto my lap and she nestles her head into the crook of my head. "Can I just stay here forever?" She asks jokingly as I run my hands through her silky hair. It's the one thing I just can't get over about her. Okay, that's a lie, there are several things that I can't stop feeling all flustered about, but one of the bigger ones is her hair. It's like the smoothest thing you've ever felt and in the morning it gets all floofy! Just my favorite thing in the entire world.

"Hmm, well you could, but then we'd miss all of our scenes today and probably get fired." I tease, lifting her head so I can give her a good morning kiss. She smiles and places a quick peck on my lips before cupping my cheek and giving me a proper kiss. After a few seconds we pull apart and she stares into my eyes, making me blush.

"As long as I get to be with you, I'll do whatever." If I thought I was blushing before it was nothing compared to how red my cheeks are now, I probably look like a tomato.

"Is that so?" I reply, raising my eyebrows in surprise. She nods her head.

"Of course,"

This girl... Making me feel all soft.

"Well, as much as I would love that, we should start to get up and get ready." I decide, moving Y/n off of my lap and getting up. She jumps up right after me and I turn around to look at her.

"Shower first, second, or together?" She asks with a mischievous grin on her face. I blush and look away.

"You choose," I reply, not wanting to say together out loud. There's dead silence and then strong arms pick me up and start walking towards the bathroom. "Y/n! Put me down!!" I shout, flailing around. She giggles and places me down in the bathroom.

"You said to choose and I decided on picking you up and taking you to the bathroom." She reasons, crossing her arms and smiling at me.

"You're so annoying," I tell her, rolling my eyes. She nods her head and shrugs.

"You love it,"

•••

Y/n POV

"Yeah? Well, I guess that means that I'm better than you Christopher." I banter back playfully as we wait for the workers to switch over a few things for the next scene.

"Just wait L/n, I'll get you back." He replies, sticking out his tongue at me and making a face. "Plus, who can reach the ceiling when they jump? Not you if I remember correctly." He teases, crossing his arms as he smirks at me triumphantly.

"Scarlett, Lizzie! Chris is bullying me!" I shout, catching the attention of my two favorite ladies who were calmly chatting beforehand. The color drains out of his face and he starts to shake his head rapidly.

"No!" He exclaims a little bit too loud. He moves closer and lowers his voice. "Y/n, I swear to God, send them away before they murder me!" He hisses, his eyes wide and his voice nervous. I smirk at him and feel a pair of arms wrap around me.

"Christopher Evans, what are you doing?" Scarlett asks in an interrogative mom voice. He steps back and holds up his hands in surrender.

"Nothing!" He protests, stepping away again. "Y/n and I were just joking around." He tries to explain as Lizzie tilts her head at him.

"Scar, he was bullying me about not being able to jump as high as him even though he's like five inches taller than me!" I whine, grabbing Lizzie's hand and pouting at her. She smiles at me and shakes her head.

"That's not very nice," Scarlett chastises him, shaking her head. "You can't bully Y/n, she's just a little baby,"

"Hey, wait I'm not a baby!-" I try to interrupt but she just shushes me and stares at Chris.

"Now apologize and go pick on someone your own size and age." She commands, her voice leaving no room for argument. Chris hangs his head and then looks back up at me.

"I'm so terribly sorry for making fun of your height Y/n, you're so incredibly tall and cool." I smile and he clenches his jaw. Scarlett smiles and turns to look away. When she does I stick my tongue out at him and turn back to see Lizzie smiling at me, shaking her head again. I release myself from Scarlett's arms and throw myself into Lizzie's.

"Hi," She greets me, amusement evident in her voice as she wraps her arms around me.

"Hi," I reply, moving a strand of hair out of her face and watching her blush at the close contact of my hands. I rest my head on her shoulder and she runs her hands through my hair gently. Placing a sweet kiss on my forehead after making sure no one was looking. Scarlett turns back around and smiles when she sees us.

"Aww cuties, Y/n, you're such a little sweetheart." I smile. She glances up at Lizzie and then back down at me. "You know if you weren't already an adult, I'd totally adopt you." I laugh and let go of Lizzie, shaking my head.

"I'm pretty sure you've got your hands full with Rose." I joke back, moving towards some lounge chairs out of the way. Scarlett sits down and then Lizzie sits down. Before I even realize what I'm doing, I'm situated on Lizzie's lap. She smiles up at me and I rest my head on her shoulder. A wave of sleepiness hits my body and I let out a yawn. Scarlett and Lizzie fall back into a conversation that I'm barely aware of and I find my eyes slowly closing as I'm curled up against my girlfriend.

Lizzie POV

I laugh at the joke Scarlett makes and glance down at Y/n, who's fast asleep.

"Okay, Liz, be honest with me." I look up at Scarlett with a nervous expression on my face. "What is going on with you and Y/n? You two look at each other as if the other hung the moon in the sky." I open my mouth to protest but Scarlett continues. "I know there's something else going on between you two, I think I'm the only one because let's be honest the others have no fucking gaydar but I can tell."

"No, Y/n and I have just been getting closer lately and physical touch is her love language so we're touchy, that's all," I reply, glancing down at Y/n who has a small smile on her face. It makes me smile too and Scarlett raises her eyebrows.

"See, no one smiles that way when they watch their friend sleep. You two have something going on, I can tell." I shake my head in protest again and Scarlett shrugs her shoulders. "Fine, I won't bother you any further but just know, I'm onto you, Olsen."

•••

I sit down on a chair in my dressing room and scroll through my Pinterest, trying to find cute photos of plants to show Y/n. I save a couple to my board and scroll past the rest, frustrated that I can't find anymore. All of a sudden, a knock on my door jolts me from my thoughts. I place my phone down on the counter and stand up, starting to walk over to the entrance. I open my door and an in-costume Y/n smiles back at me.

"Hey there pretty lady, mind if I come in?" She jokes, talking in a Southern accent. I roll my eyes and open the door for her, immediately reaching out and pulling her into a hug.

"How was filming?" I ask as we lie down together on my couch. She shrugs her shoulder and buries her face further into my neck.

"Pretty good, but I wish I could've had a scene with you." She pouts, jutting out her lip, indicating the fact that she wants a kiss. I smile and place a quick peck on her lips before going back to our conversation. She shakes her head. "Nooo, give me a real kiss." She whines, pulling my face back to hers. I cup her cheek carefully and gently connect our lips, leading our mouths in a passion-filled kiss.

Her lips glide against mine and I savor the taste of strawberry lip gloss on them, something she usually doesn't wear but her makeup artists put on when she's in costume. Her tongue slips into my mouth and she pushes me down onto my back. Our lips never leave each other's as she lifts up my leg and slots it onto her hip, causing my breath to hitch. We continue to make out until we both have to pull away to catch our breaths.

"How was that for a real kiss?" I ask teasingly, pulling her head onto my chest and letting her rest.

"11/10, Elizabeth Olsen." She jokes, letting herself relax as I wrap my arms around her.

"I'm glad to hear that." When I don't hear an immediate response I look down at Y/n and smile.

My perfect sleepy girl.

•••

"Olsen! They want you on set in five and they need Y/n too, have you seen her-" She stops short when she sees Y/n sleeping peacefully on my chest. "Oh," Y/n lifts her head a little, confused at all the noise, and then smiles up at me.

"Mm, I'm sorry, I fell asleep again, It's just because you're so comfy and we didn't get a lot of sleep last nigh-"

"Watching the movie," I interject, staring pointedly at Y/n who raises a brow confused. "We went to bed late last night because we were watching a movie," I add, glancing over at Scarlett who rolls her eyes.

"Oh my God, just say you were having sex and get over with it. Now come on, we've got to be on set soon." Y/n's eyes widen and she looks over at Scarlett.

"Oh, hey, Scar." Y/n greets her awkwardly, getting up off of me and helping me up.

"Let's go girls,"

•••

After what seems like the longest hour of my life the director yells cut and I let out a sigh of relief. It's not that I don't like Paul, he seems like a nice guy but I honestly would way rather be flirting with my girlfriend and not some man. I can also tell that Y/n is getting jealous because of the way she keeps looking at Paul: Like she wants to strangle him. I move over to her and grab her hands, letting her fidget with the rings on my fingers.

"How about we go somewhere private for a sec?" I offer, pulling Y/n towards a curtained-off section. I open the curtains and see some cleaning supplies. Perfect. I pull Y/n into a soft kiss that catches her off guard and she pulls back raising her eyebrows in surprise.

"In here? We only have five minutes." I slap her shoulder and she smiles, placing a peck on my lips.

"Just shut up and let me kiss my girlfriend before I have to go back and flirt with Mr. Red Toaster," I whine, connecting our lips a little harsher this time. Y/n laughs and pulls my waist closer as I throw my arms around her shoulders. Suddenly there's a loud bang from right outside of the curtains and I pull them open.

Robert, Chris E, Mark, Jeremy, Chris H, Aaron, and Paul stare at us with surprised expressions on their faces while Scarlett stands right next to them with a triumphant smirk on her face.

"100$ Robert, you owe me 100$."

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #256

I think I must still be in a bit of a funk. I don't feel quite as bad off as yesterday, but it's still not great, for reasons I don't fully understand.

Well, that's all right. I still went to work, and I still had a pretty great time there. I made cookies and turnovers today, and Ma put the turnovers into nice, neat little boxes:

I spent most of today bagging different kinds of breads and rolls, though, which was also nice. Bread has a lovely smell to it. The routine tasks and the nice smells are a boon to my frazzled brain. I think I must be more overwhelmed from a variety of things than I thought.

...I keep looking for you in various little ways, but lately, I guess it's kinda hard to find things that aren't... weird. In a lot of places, people depict you in a variety of cynical, cruel, and just... generally very unhealthy ways, as though you were violent, vicious, and mean from the very moment you took your first breath, and... I dunno. I guess it's disheartening and disconcerting. I've been spending less time in the various places online that I used to frequent, because of it.

...The uncertainty of whether or not any of the things I've tried to do for your sake will pull through is also feeling relatively unbearable at the moment, for some reason. Three years is a long time to withstand not knowing whether or not someone I've come to care deeply for, someone around whom I've tried to model the kind of person I want to be, will simply up and vanish from existence.

The idea that you might disappear instead of heal and move on terrifies me. The idea of watching you be mercilessly slaughtered a second time... it terrifies me.

...I'll get through it, though, so don't you worry about me. After all, what other choice have I got?

When I returned home, J was absent; he was supposed to go see a demolition derby somewhere I guess, but he changed his mind and went on a walk with one of his friends instead. He took some pictures for you along the way; he captured some pictures of a cute little snake, and some pictures of raindrops on leaves:

...You are loved. And not just by me. Do you see...?

...

I thought I was going to play some Dead Cells today, but J had a lesson at Great Barrington and he wanted me to come along, so I did. He drove, but... I wasn't really inspired by the scenery. I managed to snap a couple of relatively decent ones, but... I dunno...

...I guess I'm not really feeling especially proud of these today. But I hope you like them at least a little, anyway.

I think I might go to bed early. My brain has had enough of today, and I think I'm probably hoping that tomorrow I'll wake up and stop feeling so weird.

...Hey. I know you said that you've endured hell and so you're not afraid of death anymore. But like. Don't... don't give up and just die without putting yourself in a position where you can learn what heaven is like. It's out there. And I know it's out there, because I didn't used to think it was out there, either. And then, against all odds, and with a little bit of work, it kind of plopped in my lap unexpectedly. And I've been doing everything in my power to maintain it ever since.

...I know heaven is real because there's heaven at my house. And I know it, even on icky days like today, when it's hard to see. I know it because I practiced looking for it. Because finding heaven where you look is a skill that can be practiced, like any other. Cultivating a mindset that leads to heaven dropping unexpectedly into your lap is a skill that can be practiced, like any other.

I love you. And I'll write again tomorrow. So please keep yourself safe out there. Please.

Your friend, Lumine

[incalculablepower]

some fics i've liked lately

it's been a weird year. when i made this list of recs back in january i fully intended it to become a monthly thing, but life happened and then i guess it just kept happening. in early 2023 things were ramping up in my new career, i was practicing and playing a lot with my band to prepare for our first show, i was settling into dealing with depression and anxiety with medication, i was getting over a miserable breakup. then i fell in love. i lost my job (the best and most favourite job i've ever had) abruptly this past may. this is my longest period of unemployment since i was a teenager and while you think it would be the best time to lose yourself in fandom, i felt the opposite. fandom was such a lifeline to me when i had a miserable job and was in a bad relationship and needed an escape but i was very present in my own life this summer. i took my partner to visit my family and spent a lot of time with friends and played shows (and recorded some music... shameless self promo once again) and in between i watched so much star trek on my couch. this is such a long preamble to explain why i haven't been fandoming as much lately and why idk if i'll write anything again anytime soon (let's say, once i have a job i want to procrastinate at) but -- i HAVE been reading fic! not as much as before, but i have been, and there's enough for a fic rest list so that's what i'm giving you today. when times are dire [podfic] - @aibidil

drarry. i have such a soft spot for middle aged draco and harry falling in love, the relationships they have with their friends and their grown children. @aibidil reads her own podfics and it's an utter delight. i usually only listen to podfics or audiobooks when i'm doing work around the house but i can going on walks with my headphones just so i could listen to more of this one.

purple haze by @ashesandhackles

romione. i was so so honoured to see this pop up in my ao3 gifts during @thethreebroomsticksfic pride fest this year. it turns the well tread romione ground of shell cottage and the yule ball over a bit, using them as settings to explore a confusing mix of jealousy and sexuality for ron and hermione. ashes knows i love mess with these and it captures that teenage chaos wonderfully, then lets them laugh at it as secure and settled adults.

crookshanks by @ala-baguette

gen. warning that this is a tearjerker, especially if you've ever loved and lost a pet. i think the pure and simple expressions of love and gratitude from crook's pov here would be a comfort to any pet owner.

at some point this year, i got REALLY into the idea of a one-sided dramione. it's hard to look for, especially since it's such a popular ship but i managed to find a few that scratched the itch until i find the time and/or motivation to write one of my own new years eve by 2daughtersofathena, the guardian angel by mylifebelongstothebbc, and a boy of hans by elixirsoflife. the last one being my personal favourite, a grim take on the hanahaki disease trope.

every mother is a grave by witchofimber

this was recced by @whinlatter in @thethreebroomsticksfic discord (btw i feel like no one on my followers lists needs anyone to remind them to read beasts -- but please read beasts) and when i saw "gillian flynn treatment" in the tags i slammed the mark for later button. this is probably the most balanced and realistic portrayals of molly weasley and her role as a mother that i've ever read in hp fic. it's not weasley family fluff but it doesn't devolve into something so flat as bashing either. molly is regular mother with flaws and strengths like anyone else and how they amplify and shift with love and grief and pain and stress and duty and pressure. every single relationship she has with her children is uniquely expressed and the way it ties the past to the direct aftermath of the war is so well done and a great way to organize this giant, messy family. particular care here went into fred and george, giving them their own identities in a way that can be difficult, given the source material. a favourite line:

“Probably have tried to make us name the twins after them.” He stopped laughing, sucked in a breath. “Do you want to?”  For a second she considered it. It would be wonderful, getting to use those names again like living things. But -  “No,” she said. “I - if they were alive, I’d have said no, so I’m saying it now. Let the boys be their own people.”  The truth was that she didn’t want to lose her brothers. To have their faces erased in her memory, painted over with her sons. To have to say no, not THAT Fab, I mean UNCLE Fab - he died before you were born. Anyway, she liked the names Fred and George. It was easier like this. 

the scrunchie by @saintsenara

another fic i've meant to read for ages and finally got around to just yesterday. the background drama of these side characters as a cheap scrunchie from boots floats around them is so perfectly teenage. reminds me of the other series i loved as a teenager around the time HP was coming out: georgia nicolson and gossip girl. i could also compare it to derry girls a little, how despite the environment surrounding them these girls are still being girls, arguing about stupid things and getting crushes on boys and having the absolute most ridiculous blowout fights with your sister (parvati and padma's portrayal here is probably my favourite i've ever read!)

i also can't leave without reccing @saintsenara's wip, one year in every ten. i can't get enough of a good case fic. tomarry/harrymort (both versions of this ship, oddly, apply to this fic) is not something i've ever sought out but i really think the way it's handled here could win over any non-believer. it's sharp and funny in a way that makes it turns into poignancy hit even harder. i screenshotted two full phone screen pages of chapter 27 so i could go back and read them over and over. it might be one of the best things i've ever read from ron's POV (emphasis mine):

It had been a long ten years, with a chair at their table always left empty and a hole in their hearts always unfilled. Grief was exhausting and boring and dully painful, like a slightly sprained ankle which you can still walk on, but which always bothers you a little bit.  But there had been love among the grief. There had been love before the grief - indeed love had caused the grief - and there had been love after. His love for his parents and his siblings had changed, the way wine left in a barrel changes and becomes richer and deeper. There was more sorrow in the love, as he threw a quaffle around with George and saw the tired lines at the corner of his eyes. There was more recrimination, more struggle with the mistakes they had all made in the past, as he finally sat down and had a real chat with mum and dad about how a lifetime of corned-beef sandwiches and maroon jumpers had made him feel. But there was more joy there too. And with joy came forgiveness and understanding and hope and fun.

image used is wildflowers (1915) by tom thomson

[idolish7imagines]

hii um can i rq yamato or mitsuki having their first kiss w the reader in a (different unit/band?) concert. uhhh character paid for his ticket but reader got in bcz theyre a photographer n stuff…. ty…

Izumi Mitsuki x Reader :: Capturing a Kiss through a Lens

Typically Mitsuki would like to spend his day off cooking, relaxing, or having a casual night out drinking, but tonight was a different story.

Tonight he'd agreed to go with MEZZO'' boys to see an indie band that both Sogo and Momo had previously reccommended, and since he didn't feel like being a couch potato or practicing some dances at the dorm, he figured it'd be a good night to go since the tickets weren't pricey.

He just wanted to see what the hype about...and also you saying you'd be attending might've been a factor.

"Mikki is only here because (Y/N)-chan is going!" is a complaint Tamaki had been toting with them from the moment they got in the car to the start of the concert.

There was a nice crowd, but nothing that'd get the venue feeling stuffy, so that was nice. The boys would obviously have to be wearing disguises as to not get spotted and more importantly, not take attention away from the actual performers.

His attention is quickly turning to Tamaki suddenly chiming up and excitedly waving his hand in the air, your name being yelled loud enough to ring through the admiteddly small venue.

Sogo quickly raises up a hand toward his mouth to silence him (which was hard enough considering they were all wearing masks) as to not direct any unwanted gazes your way, you were already a photographer so thats noticible enough on its own.

Mitsuki meanwhile, feels his body become a bit warmer as you make your way over to the group, a casual yet knowing smile gracing your features. He can't even hide his smile, feeling as if anyone looked his way they'd practically see it even through his mask.

You exchange your greetings to everyone and explain why you were there, to which they all listen despite the noise all around them that could easily drown the conversation out.

"Well, sorry to bother you while you're on the clock." Mitsuki says, but by the tone you can tell there's a little tease in it.

"Don't worry about me, I can enjoy the concert and look for good angles and the same time." You reply a bit smugly.

"I guess that's a formidable photographer for ya." He reaches back to rub his neck. You didn't miss that he bothered to compliment you. "I assume you'll be moving around a bit then though, instead of standing by us." A small laugh escapes you, one that has his heart beating a bit faster upon hearing.

"I'll be back around, don't worry." .::.

The speakers were nearly at max volume, filling the venue (and outside of it) with the melodic sounds of the indie band. Penlights weren't really a thing in this scene, but people did raise their hands, something Tamaki quickly caught onto and joined. Sogo was a bit more reserved as always, but the sparkle in his eye when hearing music he enjoys wasn't missed.

Mitsuki himself had joined in on the hype, the energy of the room was infectious, as it should be at a concert.

So much so in fact, he nearly forgot that you were moving around the venue taking pictures. Your camera's flash wasn't on, making it much more discreet and less disruptive to the audience.

You nearly scare him as you quietly slipped by his side again, only seeing you at the corner of his bright orange irises.

Which, unbeknownst to him, you'd been looking into before he even fully turned to you.

Even in the ever-changing hues of the room with the mood lights above, you'd never mistake the color of those eyes and hair.

Wrapped up in your trancelike line of thought, you hadn't even realized he'd pulled his mask down, apparently asking you something judging by his expression. He'd likely thought you hadn't heard him the first time since he felt the need to take the mask off.

Feeling bad you hadn't heard him, you lean in closer so he could repeat himself.

His cheeks seemed a bit flushed and his brow furrows slightly, but he doesn't back away.

"Are...you enjoying the concert?" You could hear him more, but could telll he was going out of his way to not yell in your face despite the music and audience noise since you were already in close proximity.

"Oh...yeah.." You say. Directly after the words left you, you were worried your voice was a bit too low for him to hear.

Though, seeing his adorable smile return to his face, you quickly could tell otherwise.

"I'm glad." He says. Your faces still being inches away from each other..perhaps even closer than you'd started.

"...Mitsuki?" His name comes out a bit more vulnerable sounding than you'd intended.

"yeah?"

Maybe it was the music that had the both of your adrenaline pumping more than usual, and with that, usually came more risk taking.

And yes, maybe it would've been better to get proper clarification, but the looks you and he were giving each other, and the fact neither of you bothered to distance yourselves..

Soon, you find the sweet sensation of Mitsuki's lips on yours, sending electricity through your bodies. His fingers soon found a place upon your cheek, resting there gently.

Thankfully his fellow group members were too immersed in the spectacle in front of them to notice. This would be awkward to explain on the way back to the dorm.

As your lips part, your eyes flutter open to meet his once more.

He certainly won't be leaving with Tamaki and Sogo tonight, thats for sure.

[solarsleepless]

hello. 🧍

do you have any power ranger fic recs? doesn’t have to be trimberly, but i’m kinda in deep about them 😶

OH BOY DO I.

warning: they're all trimberly

"we gladiate but i guess we're really fighting ourselves" by sunnydalehart: a LOOONG fic that plays the idea of what the sequel would be REALLY well. i ADORE this person's tommy. also also it's one of the funniest fics i've ever fucking read you WILL be laughing at all the chatfic moments. a tw for a bit of homophobia in it and canon typical violence ofc

"the art of silence and pretty girls" by lyctors. i'll admit i haven't read this one in a WHILE so idk the plot fully but just trust me bro it's a good read

"truth will out (you)" by andawaywego. trimberly outsiders pov fic. nuff said.

"drown with me" by BerryliciousCheerio. trini angst from kim's pov!!!

"Lessons in listening to your heart, not your head" by tigermochaeyu: a soft fic of different situations where kim Feels so much for trini <3

"Open Your Eyes and See What's Been There All Along" by RealistTrash aka one of the BEST fics i have EVER read i love it sm. soulmates au AND no powers au!

"(don't ask why) I can paint a picture of you in my mind" by crosshatches, another fucking BRILLIANT fic where trini is very gay and very oblivious. another favourite <3

"Falling Like Icarus (I Have Burned For My Love)" by TaikoTurtle. kim being a bi mess and also being jelly. chapter 1 is yearning and chapter 2 is yearning too but Now With Really Well Written Jealousy Angst. <3

pink lemonade is a series, again by BerryliciousCheerio! i highly recommend this, it captures their voices REALLY well and manages to mix heavy angst with fluff wonderfully. heads up, it gets pretty heavy in some places

i have more but it's getting pretty late. hmu tmrw if you want more!

[lemonsrosesandlavender]

11, 20, and 30 for the ask game! Especially 11, I’m always desperate for recs

11. Favourite fics right now?

Hmmmm! I tend to write more fic than I read (so apologies if you've seen me rec these before...), but some of my bg3 standouts this year are:

december bloom by callmepoison is just a really hot (and in-character) modern AU oneshot where Karlach is a piercer and gives Gale a handjob before his Prince Albert. Oh, but it is SO good. Captures Gale's charming-but-self-doubting nature perfectly, and all of Karlach's warmth.

A One Night Stand at the Blushing Mermaid by @graysparrowao3. (And their whole Rugan/Aradin series!). I love the visceral grubbiness of these fics, and the excellent banter. Rugan and Aradin stay their hard-edged, jaded and sometimes-to-often-unpleasant selves, and there's nothing I love more than watching people get in their own way.

It was evening, and no longer summer by elo_elo. My favourite fic author. Her style is a little woozy to me; like a shared, receding hangover. Evocative. This is a modern AU about Tav (actually the former Dark Urge) feeling her past bubble up again in the wake of a car crash. I ADORE Lae'zel's depiction in this fic, it's just wonderful. (I adore Lae'zel full stop, and this fic really shows off her bluntness and fierce loyalty.)

20. Have you noticed any patterns in your fics? Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?

Answered here. I feel like I talk about some of my favourite themes a lot. Too much, perhaps. (One is finding identity beyond one particular skill, and the precarious self-esteem that rests on being really good at one thing and then being terrified when you see the cracks in it. The second is exploring kink and characters freeing themselves from shame around it. And obviously just heaps of subby men in love with dominant women. Mostly Rolan, but also Ludovico... and now as I think of it, also Zagreus with Megaera, though I didn't write that explicitly!)

I guess I also love a good "fuck fate/destiny" storyline. Ethel taunts Rolan that Catrin will be miserable, but she's twisting her visions of the future to mess with him. Guillermo might be a vampire slayer, but that doesn't mean he has to kill Nandor. Zagreus might not be able to spend long on the surface, but he'll fight to enjoy every single second and he won't stop trying. Hmmm! I hadn't noticed that til now. (Although... Rolan IS Phaere's fated one in In Service of Magic lol. I guess I'll overlook it if I'm horny enough lmao. Fate for thee and not for me!)

30. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?

I like sharing bits of WIPs, but it also results in a burst of editing, because the threat of being public immediately reveals all the holes in my writing. (Occasionally, I've shared bits that just fully got cut out of the chapter when it was actually published...)

I don't share entire rough drafts, though. I always edit before posting, especially for my AO3 stories. (Tumblr ficlets get a lighter touch). Once I'm finished the first draft (which for me involves a lot of editing as I go), I'll typically do one big and very in-depth edit, and sometimes another read through. From time to time, I go back and do line-level tweaks in previous chapters of a WIP.

I think my fics would be more polished and cohesive overall if I finished the entire thing before posting, but ehhhh. One day I'll do that for an actual novel!

[number-1-kuaidul-fanboy]

So... episode 95... happened...

Spoilers below as always

I... wasn't expecting it to... be like this.... goddamn...

Third Go Rush and Bridge episode to ever make me physically cry. The first was Nyandestar sacrificing herself for Manabu, the second was Kuaidul's death, and the third was... I guess the ending of this episode. It was... sort building the entire episode. This episode does a really good job at making you feel the loss of so many lives in such quick succession even if it obviously can't show all 8 million of them. This felt as though I was witnessing a widescale tragedy of the swift extinction of this species, which is exactly what it set out to do. Even though we didn't know any of these characters personally (apart from Nishaw who I'll get to), just seeing them work themselves to death was enough to leave an impression and paint a picture of who they were... it's... brilliantly agonising.

I still have some problems with the setup. From the summary, I had a problem with Valvelgear wanting to keep their deaths secret at all and Tazaki of all people helping to keep it secret but I think the episode did manage to explain those things in a way that made enough sense for me to be okay with them. Honestly Valvelgear insisting their deaths would burden Yudias too much and Tazaki getting involved and having to bear the weight of this knowledge he has to keep secret due to sheer coincidence upped the tragedy even more and is a point in this episode's favour.

My only remaining problem personally is the way Asaka ends up involved. I think Tazaki asking her to replace the people in Valvelgear with some of her employees is a pretty big leap in logic that the episode didn't explain very well for me. It still felt just like Asaka was the one involved because of the Sevens parallel.

That being said, it's basically my only problem with this otherwise masterpiece of an episode. And the ultimate payoff of Asaka keeping a similar secret about Dudi Nishaw and his fleet was genius and well worth a bit of contrivance to get us to that point. This episode is so thematically and emotionally on point that I can forgive its story flaws.

Like I said in its own designated post, this parallel is genius:

It's a good message on its own and I love the way this theme ties in with the earlier statement about Dudi's character: that while he struggles to make decisions, he always ultimately makes the right one. With these words, he proved that further, even though he may not even know exactly why these words were so meaningful. It's brilliant. This episode got me so much more attached to Tazaki, Asaka, and Nishaw than I ever was before.

Asaka and Tazaki know that their decision to keep all these deaths a secret is the wrong choice but they're making it anyways to respect the last wishes of Valvelgear and keep Yudias from losing hope. They are making a wrong decision for the right reasons and I genuinely love that. I don't think it's a flaw in the storytelling whatsoever. I think it's great that they're allowing these characters to be flawed and make poor decisions because it adds depth to their characters and complexity to the narrative.

Overall, this is the kind of episode I was waiting for from this arc: something that fully explores this narrative and captures the weight of it that the previous episodes were missing. This story needed an episode like this and it delivered.

...but yes I also pray these deaths aren't permanent holy fuck-

[stitching-in-time]

Voyager rewatch s4 ep15: Hunters

The one where they start getting letters from home! I thought that didn't happen till season 5, but it was a whole season earlier than I remembered. I completely forgot that Tuvok learns his eldest son had a daughter! Tuvok is a grandfather!! He'll get to meet his granddaughter when he gets home!! ahhhh feels!!!

Also the one where Chakotay, B'Elanna and the former Maquis learn that the rest of the Maquis in the Alpha Quadrant were all killed during the Dominion War. They're both shaken by it, but Chakotay seems to get over it a lot more quickly than B'Elanna does. probably because he's so thrilled that Janeway isn't engaged to Mark anymore.

Janeway gets a letter from Mark, telling her how he accepted that she was dead, moved on, and married someone else, which obviously upsets her. (Although tbh, if you're engaged to someone who gets over your supposed death and marries someone else in only three years, he wasn't the one, honey! He won't even wait three years for Kathyn motherfucking Janeway?! Bro didn't deserve her in the first place!!)

Harry acts like a little lost puppy waiting for a letter from his parents, which is sweet, but also, it feels a bit like Harry is actually acting younger and more awkward as time goes on rather than less, which is a weird choice I don't really like. Tom starts acting kind of jerky and pointedly dismissing the crew's excitement about the letters, which Harry sees right through, and B'Elanna calls him on it when he basically freaks out over a letter coming in from his dad. Apparently he doesn't talk about his dad to anyone but the Captain, since B'Elanna doesn't even know his dad's name, or why Tom's so upset about the prospect of hearing from him. Tom rather heartbreakingly confesses that he had a bad relationship with his dad, and feels that his life back home was such a mess he doesn't even want to be reminded of it now that he's on Voyager, where things are so much better. B'Elanna then tells him how upset she is after learning everyone she knew in the Maquis is dead, and that he should be thankful to have someone reaching out to him. This knocks some sense into Tom, who apologizes for being so wrapped up in his own problems. They hug and comfort each other, and it's a lovely moment, where we see them being very honest and vulnerable with each other in ways they usually avoid with everyone else.

Meanwhile Tuvok and Seven get captured by the Hirogen while they're out in a shuttle trying to adjust the communication relay to get clearer messages. The Hirogen are almost comically over the top bad guys- they're huge dudes in armor, whose ships look like bad Halloween decor- there's nets filled with their 'trophies', i.e. fake bones like the kind they have in doctor's offices, fake hairpieces, basically all kinds of stuff that's supposed to be scary, but just looks silly. They're supposed to be a race of hunters, but idk how they even ended up with starship technology if their culture is so obsessed with hunting trophies. (But I give them a pass because I know 'The Killing Game' is coming up, and I love that one, so I'll try to ignore how stupid they are in the meantime.) They try to make trophies out of Tuvok and Seven, but before they can boil them in acid, or feed them to piranhas, or whatever nefarious evil way they de-bone their victims, Voyager rescues them. The communication relay gets damaged in the fight, and Voyager loses it's one way to communicate with home, cutting off before an encrypted message from Starfleet comes through fully. B'Elanna comes to personally deliver the last letter that came through, from Harry's parents, which Harry is adorably overjoyed about. (The why he isn't also expecting a letter from Libby, idk. Guess he just forgot about her after season 2!) B'Elanna lets Tom know that the letter from his dad got lost before they could download it, but encourages him to believe it was well meant. Tom decides he'll try to be positive, for once, and believe that it was, which is a pretty big turning point for his character development.

It ends with Janeway and Chakotay having a little chat in her ready room, where Janeway rather obliviously talks about how she's coping with knowing it's over with Mark, while Chakotay can barely contain his glee at knowing he's got a clear shot now. Idk if we're supposed to believe Janeway doesn't notice, or if she's pointedly ignoring him, or what, but the conversation turning to Janeway's assessment of her romantic prospects in the Delta Quadrant, while Chakotay stares at her with heart eyes and says 'I think there's still plenty of time', and then walking out together arm in arm, is the most obviously shippy thing I can think of. Sorry writers, it's your fault people ship them. Also Kate Mulgrew and Robert Beltran's fault for playing it the way they do, but whoever gave them these scenes and expected it not to turn out this shippy is the dumbass here. Just saying.

Tl;dr: Idk why it's called Hunters, when the Hirogen are barely in it, and the letters the crew gets from home are what the episode is really about. They shoulda called it 'Letters', but whatever it's called, it works really well. A wonderfully character driven episode, where everyone gets a moment to reveal their inner hopes and fears. An important milestone for the Voyager crew, and compelling to watch the whole way through.

[thedrunkenreadersreviews]

A reaction to the Goodreads Choice Awards of 2023

Oh, the weather outside is frightful! At least where I live. No snow, but, man, is it cold. So, I am staying toasty with a little rose chocolate tea spiked with some nice peppermint schnapps to get into the holiday spirit because Lord knows I need to get jolly after this shit show.

*Sip, sip*

Anywho, the Goodreads Choice Awards winners have been announced for this year, and while I won't comment on every category because some I simply do not read, I will put in my two cents for any who care to know it about particular categories. I'll go through them one by one in the order in which they appear on Goodreads.

So, grab some nice tea and schnapps, put on those fuzzy socks, and let's get to it.

*Sip, sip*

Best Fiction - Yellowface by R. F. Kuang

In my humble opinion---as I assume that is what you are here for---the Goodreads Choice Awards has become a popularity contest. Now, I do not often read contemporary fiction so I cannot speak fully on this, but I will make one comment; I did not know or have heard of any of the other authors in this category. Just looking at the nominees, I knew without even having read the thing, "Pffft, Yellowface is going to win." Lo and behold.

*Sip, sip*

Now, it is very possible that Yellowface deserved to win. I know of R. F. Kuang's writing through the Poppy War trilogy, which is well crafted, to say the least. Having not read any of these books, I cannot be too harsh. It does twist my lips a bit, however, that this one was predictable without even having to read any of the books in that category, so that's how this "voting" process, I thought, was going to go.

And sometimes ... damn ... sometimes I hate being right.

*Sip, sip*

Romantsy - Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros

*Sip, sip, sip, sip, sip, sip*

Oh, a full review of this book will be coming after the holiday season. As with all the others I mention. But this one winning compared to the others in the lineup ...?

We have Foxglove King, The Hurricane Wars, The Jasad Heir, and Assistant to the Villain!

I am in no way suggesting that if you enjoyed Fourth Wing that you are wrong. Having it win in this category with the other nominees feels almost like a worm burrowing beneath my blood if I think on it for too long. The book, I am sorry to say, is just not that great. The romance does not at all feel like romance, it feels like lust. If Goodreads really wants to put books that have "romance" in them that is not legitimate romance, they should create a "Spicy" category or something like that. I did not feel the devotion between the two leads in this book. I did not get the sense that they would do anything for each other, make tremendous sacrifices, or perform grand gestures. I fully believed they wanted to bone each other since they met, but that is all. Yarros, known for her romance books and not her fantasy ones until now since this is her first fantasy book, fails to capture this sense of not needing each other physically, but in all the other ways. I would not be upset if these two end up not being endgame by the conclusion of the series, that is how little I feel for them as a couple.

*Sip, sip*

Yes, I know it is the first book and that the relationship between the two can develop in future books. In that case, let that book, which presents their devotion, be nominated in this category. Not the starting point book.

Fantasy - Hell Bent by Leigh Bardugo

I will confess that I did not read Hell Bent and so I cannot speak to the winner. I did, however, read most of the nominees. Tress of the Emerald Sea is not Brandon Sanderson's best work, but it is not a bad book at all! A Day of Fallen Night ... well, I wasn't that big a fan of Priory either, so I guess it is understandable that I wasn't too entertained with this one.

V. E. Schwab is one of my all-time favorites as that woman has the ability to rip out my heart, stomp it into hardening cement, and shove it back into my chest just for me to come limping back, hands outstretched, begging for more. I still do not forgive some of her past cruelties and yet, I am not complaining. However, I understand why The Fragile Threads of Power did not win this round. Again, not a bad book by any means! I just get why it wasn't the winner. I am currently reading The Witch King, and I am devouring it!

But the one I was rooting for, the one I was hoping would win, even though I knew in my heart that it wouldn't was Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries. A review of that book will be posted shortly and perhaps then it will become clear why I was hoping it would win.

As for Leigh Bardugo, great job! Fantasy is the one category I feel might still maintain some creative integrity. But not always.

*Sip, sip*

Also, did anyone else notice that The Unmaking of June Farrow has an eerily similar title and font to The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer, so much so that I thought it was a spinoff series to the latter until I saw the author's name?

*Suspicious sip, sip*

Science Fiction - The Lives of Puppets by T. J. Klune

NO! NO!!! THE FERRYMAN HAS FAILED ME!!! Oh, I was so sure it had a chance! I believed in it ... until I saw the cartoonish cover that brought my thoughts immediately to The House in the Cerulean Sea and then I knew The Ferryman was doomed.

Of course, T. J. Klune would win. I knew it because, no, they are not a bad writer, but they are a resoundingly popular one. The House in the Cerulean Sea was everywhere, that cover art has become synonymous with T.J. Klune. Even if you don't read the synopsis or were aware that a new T.J. Klune book was coming out, you see that cover and you suddenly know without looking for the name, "Oh, a new T.J. Klune book is out." I am almost convinced that a nice chunk of the people who voted for this one didn't even read it. They saw the cover art, heard of House, and clicked "vote."

*Somber sip, sip*

Horror - Holly by Stephen King

I think it should be a rule that Stephen King's works can no longer be nominated (I'm joking). But the same issue still applies; you know the author, you vote for the author, and the lesser-known authors who may have written a horrific masterpiece do not stand a chance against the King.

*Shivering sip, sip*

Young Adult Fantasy & Science Fiction - Divine Rivals by Rebecca Ross

*Sip, sip, sip, sip*

Don't talk to me. Do NOT talk to me! I will not yield on this one! A Curse for True Love (it has its flaws, see my review of it, but still), Foxglove (fucking FOXGLOVE), THE STOLEN HEIR!

Let me say, even though ACfTL was not the masterpiece it could have been, my goodness, the magic in it, especially that finale! But I can excuse Curse not winning. Truly, I'm not that mad about it.

Foxglove?! FOXGLOVE?! Adalyn Grace has grown so much as an author! And Foxglove totally displays that. I was convinced about the whole main plot point until we got to that realization and it's like, I want Wisteria now! I hated and loved Fate the whole way through that damn book. But even that one, I can forgive.

*Sip, sip*

*Peeks from the rim of my cup, eyes caught in the glow of the flames from my hearth*

But ...

you have come after my child.

You have crawled from the depths of a black abyss and come to steal away my precious.

My love for the kingdom of Elfhame cannot be burned away by the fires of Mount Doom.

The dementors cannot steal it from my soul.

The White Walkers cannot freeze me enough to abandon it for the promise of warmth.

And even if I were to be turned to stone by Medusa's gaze my heart would continue to beat with devotion for the High King & Queen of Elfhame as well as all of the inhabitants of Elfhame!

*Sip, sip*

The Stolen Heir by Holly Black, in case you haven't figured it out, is who I was rooting for (review for that one to come around Christmas).

*Calming sip, sip*

Memoir & Autobiography - Woman in Me by Britney Spears

*Raises mug* Go off, Queen!

*Sip, sip*

History & Biography - The Wager (extended title) by David Grann

Surprisingly, I have no qualms with this category. This book was a banger! So was Killing the Witches and Pathogenesis (extended title). I recommend all three of these and was simply wishing one of them would win.

Victory screech!

*Sip, sip*

Now ... my biggest gripe with these choice awards ... where is the Middle Age & Children category? Where is the Graphic Novels, Comics, & Manga category? Where is Poetry?

I don't even read that much poetry, but I appreciate it as an art and believe it should be represented.

Graphic Novels, Comics, & Mangas ... like so many of those have genius writing and storytelling within them. The worlds are incredible and the art sometimes so amazingly compliments it! One of my favorite comic book writers is Al Ewing and one of my favorite artists is Lee Garbet, and when the two of them worked together, it was outstanding! The art and the story went hand in hand so well, it was as if it all came from one mind. They deserve to be acknowledged, even if it is one person doing both.

And manga ... some of the most intricate universes, complex worlds, and ingenious magic systems are created in mangas. One of my all-time favorite stories ever told is Fullmetal Alchemist. Every single detail matters in that story, and it was heartbreaking, and hysterical, and action-packed, and touching all at once!

But to strip away Middle Grade and Children? You might as well discourage kids from reading. It was when I saw that these categories were removed to make room for "romantsy" that I knew this is a popularity contest. It has been for a while. But those in middle school and younger, they probably don't have a Goodreads account, they probably aren't voting.

But they might be looking.

And teachers, and parents. They're still here. And some of them want kids to read.

*Sip, sip*

In conclusion, I don't really believe the choice awards hold that much merit anymore. I couldn't care less if a book was a nominee or a winner when deciding if I should read it. To be fair, I never really did. But I would encourage others who are wandering into the culture of Goodreads and documenting their reading that just because the book is a trend and popular and is a Goodreads choice award "winner" or "nominee" does not mean that the book is good.

It might be mediocre.

*Sip, sip*

Well, I won't take up any more of your time. Reviews for the books I mentioned will be posted in time. If you would like a review for a book in particular, do not hesitate to tell me what it is.

Stay warm, keep calm, and always have a good evening.

Cheers.

*Festive sip, sip*

[madame-ellunas-moonlit-readings]

May 7 - Stranger In A Strange Land

Re Dracula/Dracula Daily

I think from now on I will continue to read Dracula Daily as I listen to Re Dracula. This time it was not a line that was skipped, but 3 paragraphs. It's an understandable thing to skip, just very specific details on the house Dracula wishes to purchase. Honestly, I'm glad they skipped it. I'd rather not listen to them prattle on about the houses walls and the streets it lies on. Reading and Listening are two very different experiences, treating them as such was a good choice. But it is good to know what was missed. Especially as I'm new to the story and would rather not accidentally skip something important.

But I'll go into the missed parts when I get to it, for now, the story.

When Jonathon woke up to find a note from Dracula excusing him from dinner, I couldn't help but wonder how many excuses the man has up his sleeves. They can only go on for so long, surely. It is interesting how the author shows things to be suspicious through absence. Whether it be the Count himself, the lack of mirrors or there being no servants at all. I guess that driver was him then.

Jonathon's finally gathered himself to exploring the place too. First his room, which was filled with precious things centuries old but extremely well-maintained. Is Dracula taking good care of his belongings, or are there some practical uses to his magic? Then out of his rooms to locked doors. And of the first unlocked room he finds is a library which immediately captures him. A man after my own heart.

It is curious how many of those books are English and clearly new. Has the Count been visiting the bookstores. There are some that are clearly new(ish) by the titles.

I'll list some of the books down below, including those mentioned later.

London Directory (now known as the white pages), a telephone system was already well established so he access to both their numbers and addresses

Red & Blue Books (government briefings, if modern terms match), so he's getting a feel for the lay of business and authority too

Whitaker's Almanac (facts, figures and statistics relating to the UK and the world), to help him understand the wider and more minute facts of the world he plans to venture into, I would guess

The Army & Navy Lists (lists of army and navy soldiers)

The Law Lists (I'm not sure, maybe the laws?)

Bradshaw's Guide (railway timetables and travel guides), he was actively reading this one

A marked Atlas open to England (an iffily marked marked, not spooky at all)

It's a bit eery, considering the genre of the story. But not as much as what comes up in their following conversations.

Dracula showed up while Jonathon was browsing and was glad to have found him there. He insists that he doesn't know English fully but would like for Jonathon talk with him more so he can learn. He goes far as to request he picks up any mistake, any off intonation, anything mismatched at all. I guess to better blend in and not get caught in his violence. He himself states that,

But a stranger in a strange land, he is no one; men know him not—and to know not is to care not for.

It contrasts well with how Jonathon was treated by Carpathian citizens on his arrival. How hard they work to send him, and failing that, protecting him.

He goes to say that even still he would be a master, or at least master to none. So he definitely isn't looking to live among them when blending in.

At this point Dracula officially allows Jonathon into any unlocked part of the castle (adventure, anyone?) and moves onto the cultural differences. Considering how he directed Jonathon to his questions of his strange experiences thus far, focussing on the treasure marker blue flames, I'd say he's decided to kick the gaslighting into gear. And even in these explanations the Count has focussed on violent histories and speaking lowly of the citizens here.

His character isn't just shown through disdain and violent interests, but also his strong focus on the house and surrounding areas. He questioned Jonathon on various aspects of the house and location fiercely and had gone into his own research as well, startling him at how much more of the place he knew. Dracula says he obviously must as both Jonathon and his boss, Peter Hawkins, would be in Exeter, miles away.

Dracula is good at saying things that aren't odd or are easily excusable. But when added up, 😬. There was no need for the 'I know where you live' comment, really.

Here's where the podcast skips. In between "So!" and "I am glad that it is old and big".

In the missed bits Dracula signed his lease and other necessary legal documents, and Jonathon got them ready for mailing. Dracula asks how him came across a place so suitable, so Jonathon reads out notes on the place he had found. And yeah, it's suitable all right.

"At Purfleet, on a by-road, I came across just such a place as seemed to be required, and where was displayed a dilapidated notice that the place was for sale. It is surrounded by a high wall, of ancient structure, built of heavy stones, and has not been repaired for a large number of years. The closed gates are of heavy old oak and iron, all eaten with rust.

"The estate is called Carfax, no doubt a corruption of the old Quatre Face, as the house is four-sided, agreeing with the cardinal points of the compass. It contains in all some twenty acres, quite surrounded by the solid stone wall above mentioned. There are many trees on it, which make it in places gloomy, and there is a deep, dark-looking pond or small lake, evidently fed by some springs, as the water is clear and flows away in a fair-sized stream. The house is very large and of all periods back, I should say, to mediæval times, for one part is of stone immensely thick, with only a few windows high up and heavily barred with iron. It looks like part of a keep, and is close to an old chapel or church. I could not enter it, as I had not the key of the door leading to it from the house, but I have taken with my kodak views of it from various points. The house has been added to, but in a very straggling way, and I can only guess at the amount of ground it covers, which must be very great. There are but few houses close at hand, one being a very large house only recently added to and formed into a private lunatic asylum. It is not, however, visible from the grounds."

I agree with Dracula. How did he come across a place so well suited to him? I'll leave a link on what a Carfax is down below.

But this is where we get back to the podcast.

Jonathon's observational skills are serving him well. Dracula goes on about how he is old and weary and likes the shadows and time to to myself, but to Jonathon his expression doesn't match at all. To him his smile seemed "malignant and saturnine", meaning malevolent and gloomy. Even worse, when Dracula left and Jonathon piled together his papers, he found an Atlas opened to a map of England. It was marked up with circles at the east side of London, on Exeter (the area where he and his boss lives, very creepy, very ominous) and on Whitby on the Yorkshire Coast.

Seriously, just run.

When Dracula comes back to chat until the rooster crowed, his instincts kicked back into gear as well. I get that you feel "under obligation to meet my host's wishes in every way", but kick that duty or social anxiety out of the way and leave. Even you thought the chill you were feeling was something reminiscent to turning of tides when one meets death. Listen to your instincts and just go already.

At least he was able to rest after after this journal entry. Probably. But we can definitely see the Count testing more and more of his bounds, slowly pushing Jonathon into a corner.

It was another good chapter.

My thanks to Re Dracula and Dracula Daily.

[captainderyn]

Now, if I may be a lil greedy in return, lol, 3, 19, & 20 from the AO3 wrapped <3

Absolutely lol it's only fair xD Thank you for the asks!

--

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

Lol so I have two answers, both of which no one has seen yet ;--; the first one is my original novel, titled Deeper Waters right now, that is probably a solid 75-80% of the way through its first draft right now. I took a break to write Fictober, but plan to pick it up again in the new year as I settle into my new place and the dust starts to settle. It's the first original work I've been able to make it this far into and actually feels like I might want to take it somewhere. I've written close to 73k on it since February and that's a massive achievement for me.

The second one is a prompt-fill gone wild for Ryn and Garrus that got way too long to even fit the prompt fill anymore and has taken on its own life that deals with the very real impact the Reaper War starts to have on Ryn post Thessia and its consequences and kJDHFkfhs I'm excited to share it so here's a snippet:

“Garrus.” she said with the sort of calm that put him on immediate high alert. All the color had drained from her face, leaving her eyes wide and stark against her pallid skin, “You need to call the Normandy.”

“Tali’s working on it--�� Garrus followed Ryn’s hands, body going unnaturally still.

The Phantom had worked a long, black blade between the fibrous parts of her armor and the carbonized plating. It blended into the dark metal of her armor at a first glance.

Ryn’s hands flitted around it, “Suit deploys medigel.” She reasoned with that too-calm voice, “Medigel can’t fix that.”

Honestly it's got a lot of extremely raw emotion in it and tension that I feel like I haven't been able to capture very easily recently in my writing and kjsfhkjdf I'm so excited to share it.

For stuff that y'all have seen lol...definitely Dog Tags as I feel like its the most comfortably and correctly I've been able to capture the complicated mess that is Ryn and Garrus' feelings at the beginning of ME2.

I dunno, this year I finally feel like I've bounced back from a lot of stuff that happened previously and finally found my place here on tumblr again. I finally feel like I'm getting a bit of my Just Deryn identity back :') it's quite pleasant.

Read more because whoopsies

19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

Shakarian! Lol for realsies I have so many more fics for Ryn and Garrus in store. So many ideas for them have started flowing that I just don't think I'll be able to stop writing them xD

Not a pairing, but I want to get back into writing Five and Era as a team, whether that's in their Imperial Agent format or adapting them for Cyberpunk 2077. I guess we shall see :P

Ngl there's part of me that wants to get back into the interacting-more-with-other-people's-characters side of things as these last few years I've been playing in my little sandbox of Wulf/Raenor and Garrus/Ryn but I don't even know how to reintegrate myself there lol.

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

Is it cheating to say Dog Tags? Because the answer out of fics from this year is Dog Tags. I do regularly go back and reread Under the Party Tree as I really like how some of those turned out, but it hasn't been long enough for me to fully enjoy going back and rereading those yet. They're still too fresh.

That being said of all time, the fic I go back and reread the most is fictober '19 Moments in Time. The adoration I have for the fics in this collection is nearly unmatched and I reread them all the time. I think it might be because it was my step back into writing fic after quite a long break and my first time back to writing two characters that were fully mine without the support of someone to bounce ideas off of and hash out all the details with.