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skeletonfumes · 2 months ago

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Survived 8 day straight in the kitchen only fora once in a generation storm to hit. Four days no power or water. Having loads of fun.

#txt #🫠#I’m fine #just really out here #like what am I doing #above ground tho #got food & water #grateful trust

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shalom-iamcominghome · 3 months ago

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I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.

This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.

This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.

But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.

I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.

I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.

I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.

I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.

#jumblr #jew by choice #jewish conversion #personal thoughts tag #abuse tw #i am not sharing this for the sake of pity and i also ask not to be told to divulge my abuse story. that isn't relevant #i have been needing to engage with this topic for a long time though and judaism has helped me a bit in navigating healing #but i decided to share this publicly in the hopes it will help other survivors specifically of familial/parental abuse #i know how it feels (in general). it's so lonely and you can really harbor (understandable) baggage about this particular commandment #i have a meeting with My Rabbi (sponsoring rabbi) and i might bring this up. we've only spoken once face-to-face (zoom)#so that might be really Intense to bring up to him but he is very kind and i trust him (which is why he is My Rabbi)#and he has already told me that he WANTS me to wrestle with g-d and His word *with* him #again i am posting this publicly so i can document my thoughts and keep them straight but also with the hope it MIGHT help others #if it even *casually* inspires another survivor i will feel so grateful (though it is THEIR achievement and not mine to claim)#i want us to survive. i want us to eat well. i want us to smile #i will say that this must be a very sudden whiplash in tone from my last post about sex. from sex to awful horrific abuse #my stream of consciousness is just Like This though in the sense that i have very sudden realizations and tonal whiplashes #so you're just getting a very frank look into how my brain is structured and what my brain thinks are important enough to think about #if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*

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dotsunflowers · 6 months ago

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"My heart's okay." | Paul Strickland

(ID in alt; description also available below the cut.)

[Image ID: Digital fanart of Paul Strickland from 9-1-1: Lone Star, signed in the bottom left with a 'Dot [flower symbol] s' signature. Paul is wearing his firefighter turnouts; in this rendering, the tri-striped glow strips on the turnouts are in the trans flag colours. The heavy jacket of the uniform is unbuttoned, and Paul is holding one of the flaps in his hand, revealing his navy blue t-shirt and uniform suspenders beneath, as well as a golden heart (drawn in the anatomical style) which glows in the centre of his chest. Its glow radiates out, illuminating Paul's face and torso. /end ID.]

#911 ls #fanart #911 lone star fanart #paul strickland #dot draws #should i have added the pacemaker?#continuing to practice and learn #still definitely a beginner #but grateful for the outlet #quote from s03e10 #considered using #“Do you have any idea what that's like to not be able to trust your own heart to keep beating?”#as well #described #vmd #911 lone star #vmgp

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ultipoter · 5 months ago

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A pokemon masters screenshot redraw that got Way Out Of Hand. (and I insist on posting this as a redraw, I feel the original context is Important)

Also, I finally remembered to record my process of drawing this (and then some :^D)

#volo #ウォロ #pokemon #pla #pokemon legends arceus #pokemon masters ex #mareep #giratina #yes it's there trust me #mine #fanart #so i took that snap and I thought it was hilarious and was immediately struck with an idea #I was like alright i need to draw him like a biblical fresco or something with a halo behind his head and holding a lamb #and then I just kept getting ideas and this went Someplace Else #but I'm still quite happy with it #the background gave me a lot of trouble though #on another canvas because I didn't want to show my struggle in the recording KHGD #but fwends helped and I'm eternally grateful #I was gonna add audio to the video #or I originally did #I had Volo's theme #then like two seconds of Doopliss' theme from Paper Mario ttyd #but then the video got in a stupid aspect ratio and I would have had to do it all over again And I Can't Be Bothered #ysee I was playing that with fiance while drawing this and wanted to draw that lil ghostie #and then yume nikki day happened and I had to draw Madotsuki #so yeah enjoy the process of that too #christ this is too many tags anyway take this

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dailyloopdeloop · 6 months ago

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loop and mirabelle. That's it that's the ask

DAY 84: enrolled in the gossip wars

#codacheetah #isat #loop isat #mirabelle isat #isat spoilers #vaguely. mostly for the tags #i think it'd be sooo funny if like. loop and mirabelle postcanon.#loop has rejoined the party somewhat recently and they are not at all adapting. to be honest. reunion probably happened too soon #bc they are a siffrin which means they are disgustingly sentimental. their ass is not taking the time to discover themself as a new person.#do you really think loop is gonna take their own advice.lol.#lmao even #Ok so anyways i think the party and loop would have a weird thing going on #like theyre all extremely grateful to loop. and they trust loop through the general basis of theyre apparently very dear to siffrin #but fucking nobody knows what to make of this bitch. odile knows they are hiding Something but she has no certain evidence to pin it down.#isabeau can't catch loop alone for more than 5 seconds. has the distinct sense they're avoiding him and he does not know why #bonnie....well tbh i think they'd vibe with loop. bonnie win.#mirabelle. i think she wouldn't really like loop? not at first anyways #do you remember in sasasap mirabelle telling siffrin(loop) that for a long time she thought they were a callous sort of person #bc they never took anything seriously at all. like the whole journey didnt mean anything. until they took an eye for bonnie #i think mirabelle would catch a similar vibe towards loop(lol.) bc like #like loop's main presence in the group is negging siffrin and being weird and dodgy around everyone else #i don't even think they'd be mean to the others but they would do everything in their power to throw the party zero bones #so all mirabelle has to go on for loop is that they're kind of a dickhead to her friend and that they're not receptive to normal group #social activities. i think being on the receiving end of mirabelle's kindness would make loop kind of sad and she'd pick up on it #but like. loop is inexplicably important to siffrin. she doesn't know the details bc neither of them want to talk at all about the loops #and i think siffrin would be especially dodgy abt talking about loop in the interrim between them rejoining and them being Presumed Dead #so mirabelle tries a new strategy to bridge the gap between her and loop. the power of Mutual Haterism #more specifically i think mirabelle would get the impression of loop as being much more of a bitch than they actually are #due to the aforementioned siffrin negging #so like. maybe that's just how they socialize maybe they'd be down to talk about hot takes and gossip a bit

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foxedfriend · 5 months ago

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Your honour, what the “witness” fails to mention about the “attack” is that I only beat up the writer after they wrote a beautiful story of a queer character falling in love with their best friend over the better part of a decade, hint subtextually at it being requited, had the interviews and promotions of the media play into it and profit from queer viewers feelings… only to end it tragically and/or follow it up by writing the queer character a one dimensional love interest within the last few episodes, put nothing into the relationship, and have them be the endgame instead. Did I mention they yanked the fans around for YEARS?? Literally years. Almost a decade. Yeah. So. I plead self defence.

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knowgodknowpeace · 2 years ago

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Thank You God Always 🤍

#god #jesus #christ #christian blog #lord #love #prayer #faith #pray #jesus christ #bible #trust #grateful #chrisitanity #christian #christianity #life #blessed #blessings #church

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livelaughlovepedri · 5 months ago

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happy birthday lamine, so proud of what you have achieved and excited for what’s about to come🫶🏽🤱🏽

#had to add that pic with xavi cuz he was the first one to trust him :( forever grateful mister #lamine yamal #fc barcelona #spain nt

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dano-or-not · 5 months ago

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I'm so happy Mob Psycho 100 has a canon happy ending for everybody. No I don't want evil evil and suffering forever all the time, I want everyone to laugh over cake and for Mob to have 1 billion best friends. And no that's not too much to ask because that's what happened. I relate to Mob a lot and I know other people do too so if things can be great for him then it can happen for us. And you know what it did happen to me my life got better too! So yes I do want super happy ending. Me and Mob together we will both get that good life! If you have eternal torture and sad au I'm sure it's lovely and very well written but that is not my cup of tea.

#yes I read the summary on chapter 47 of a breach of trust last night #very cool story but definitely too sad for me so im very grateful for that summary #mob psycho 100 #mp100 #shigeo kageyama #fandom #fanfiction

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lonewolf638 · 1 year ago

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'i owe him everything' is actually so crazy. dean saving sam over and over again the debt piling on and sam never being able to catch up forever the little brother trailing behind who gets n gets && sam's hero worship as a child just continuing as szns pass, like god there is nothing dean can do that sam won't forgive dean will forever be the perfect good man

#violating sams trust & getting the mark right after. hunting sam in his own home n they never talk abt it #telling sam he has to die. getting ready to kill him n seeing how he placed a dead mother before his own self as more important / worthy #n they never talk abt it #idk everything keeps on accumulating and piling and sam will always be in the position where he has to be grateful #n he is grateful! 'my family saved me'!#i think. sams whole problem is that he is loved too much by the wrong people #not that dean is wrong but like. it is impossible for him to ever repay dean #sam and dean #sam winchester #spn #rambles

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dykedvonte · 5 days ago

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I think the most baffling thing about the Tulpar as a vessel to me is the fact that the ship really did only have a one way communication system.

I know it was cheap but even the most basic of vessels regarding major transport would have some way, shape or form for outside communication. Not only that but there was absolutely no form of innate emergency signal to show they may have been offline or in trouble despite clearly having a system to dock credits if they went off course. It's another factor that really shows that bad situations are made to get worse by design. One person who is required to relay all information to the crew and make all the choices without feedback. No way to update or call for help in case of a dire situation. No way to inform of inner personal conflicts and acquire procedures accordingly.

It really is like they are all in some sort of fucked up solitary confinement. They have their own world with strict roles that are meaningless in the end, as long as the cargo makes it, it doesn't matter what happens on that ship to the company. They don't want to hear anything and will come to conclusions on what happened based on how much pay they can withhold from the workers. Even what they do send is short, sterile and corporate to the extent it was likely written and sent out with a command by some random unmanned computer in an office.

There's something to be said about how unfair it is to force absolute power and control onto one person when you as an entity could do so much more to offload it but I've said it many times before so I won't again.

#its just like idk i dont think Curly was a bad captain because we only have this scenerio and I certainly dont think a man like Swansea #would like him or have very little issues with him specifically if he was incompentent or too lienent in the past but I do think the stress #was making him worse and worse as being a present leader as it dawned on him how much he actually had to handle like I really think he #just wanted to do yknow normal captain pilot stuff and fly the ship and yknow the little stuff like make sure things run right and over tim #the constant stress and strain of having to make every major choice started to grate on him and freak him out cause they cant even fucking #eat unless he pulls out the scanner and starts cooking like he has to choose the meal likely or have a vote and i make that part of the #reason he seems so indecisive and inactive is the fact he has to make the choice all the time and he's hoping he can at least make the crew #feel a little more in control of themselves as people by staying out of affairs like the game or disputes because god he literally has to #choose for them all the time like thats a lot of responsibility monitering their sleep their breaks food consumption thats all on him like #it really should be another persons job entirely as thats almost like absoulte contrl over the lives of everyone else that PE forces onto #that title and its also crazy how everyone accepts it even if they dont like it like they broke the food machine open rather than get the #scanner they all waited two months before Jimmy appointed himself leader its so scary how conditioned they all are to the environemnt #cause that sort of mindset is sadly real where people just wait everyone just waited until it was getting real dire and then they still #followed Jimmy without too many complaints like i saw a fic or post where Anya acknowledges they all kinda just let Jimmy do what they want #because he became the captain and it was stupid on all their parts cause they could clearly see how bad he was and yet he was captain so #they just fell in line to their roles and thats a bigger point towards how PE treated them and the complacency capitalism brings to you #just like something that irks me because idk I know Curly is slow to act but he's not as like unopinionated as people make him out to be #like he does try to find solutions but they are still restricted at the end of the day by what PE provides them and I think his biggest c #crime is being in his own head too much and not giving Anya that emotional stability cause like idk man was he supposed to go to Home Depot #himself and install like padlocks? even if the let Anya sleep in medical after she pointed it out she was already pregnant at that point #like we arent seeing the inherent issue that no one not even Anya herself was thinking of the preventative measures because a)there was a #point nothing was happening that necessitated them b) it would've been the responsibility of PE to address them pre and post incident and c #there is only one person on the entire ship given the authority to do anything. You can not make multiple important choices in one instance #in such little time and Curly should not have had that total power like i think the most interesting thing in takes that really blame Curly #is that level of control they give him over the company. Like again i think about the three days we miss between the eval/party and the #convo/crash like i think people switch them around as if those scenes happen in succession when they are broken up and its heavily implied #Curly and Jimmy just havent been talking vs the depiction that she told him and for like three days Curly was just chummy despite the fact #Jimmy and him just had a blow out fight like the next time we assume they talk is during the crash sequence cause he honestly hangs #around Anya more which i think is really important because she trust Curly to defend her himself but not his judgement to give her somethin #to defend herself as she knows he believes her but also knows she's not seeing the danger the same and its heartbreaking and more

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chloecherrysip · 2 years ago

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I'm telling you, everything's gonna be all right as long as we're together!

#mario movie #mario movie spoilers #super mario bros #super mario bros movie #super mario bros movie spoilers #cherrysip edits #i've seen so many screenshots and a few scattered gifs but it doesn't seem like anyone's actually done a proper gifset SO #I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS SCENE. SO UNBELIEVABLY NORMAL. I DIDN'T WATCH THIS CLIP 60 TIMES AND CRY EVERY TIME #YOU CAN'T PROVE ANYTHING #but seriously it is unbelievable how sweet these brothers are. i am SO grateful that the movie is actually giving a lot of emotional weight #to their relationship! i just can't get over how mario is wholly focused on soothing luigi because that's what's important to him #and how luigi does relax and smile because he trusts his brother wholeheartedly #PICTURES TAKEN SECONDS BEFORE DISASTER :( :( :( :( :( :(#i also love how you can tell mario genuinely did not know that luigi was sucked in too (this is confirmed in the newest tv spot too)#and so he's kind of in quiet awe of where he is and then HE SEES LUIGI and PROTECTIVE BIG BROTHER MODE activates instantly #their reunion in the movie is actually going to end me. i will leave my mortal body behind and rejoin the sea. IT BETTER BE GOOD #but after this i don't see how it CAN'T be. this relationship is clearly the heart of the movie - if it's already emotional in this scene #then they've got to pay that off at the end!!! it's the law!!! otherwise things will just fall flat. i believe in u movie don't let me down

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danwhobrowses · 1 year ago

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It shouldn't need to be said but I'm seeing a lot of vitriol towards Ashton about their actions and I have to say I don't agree with them.

At the clock tower Fearne brought up the shard, stated that in her opinion Ashton should take the shard because she didn't want it. Ashton decided then as a result they'd take it, but because it was an extreme risk made very aware to them all they knew the other Hells wouldn't allow them to go through with it. Ashton asked Fearne if she was okay with both of them going together alone with the plan, reiterating that they didn't want to put this on Fearne, that if they died Fearne would not be to blame, and that they have no intention of dying, and Fearne said yes.

Fearne having second thoughts at the Ziggurat was just worry, because she cares deeply for Ashton, Ashton kissing her was not manipulation either; it was letting go of fear, having no regret with the person they also care deeply for and taking the risk. And yeah, it was frightening, 10 rounds of perpetual fiery near-death situations and one actual death situation; Laura is fuming, Ashley cannot look, Liam is playing Mad World on loop in his mind, even Matt is completely on edge, but they survived. Accusations that Ashton manipulated Fearne to selfishly take the shard seem to misinterpret the shard saga as well as Fearne and Ashton's characters, they will get a very intense amount of chastising for sure, but it will be out of love, out of the fear that they were going to lose them, not because they thought Ash was manipulative.