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sniffanimal · 6 months

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HRT that turns you into a leopard gecko:

immediate results: start to feel colder all the time

2-4 weeks: skin itches a lot, vegetables start to churn your stomach, mucous membranes like your eyes and mouth feel drier

3-6 months: skin starts to flake off in noticeable dandruff-like patches all over your body. you should start using an oil based moisturizer since the water based ones just dont do the trick anymore. You should also start transitioning your diet to insectivore. your coccyx hurts when you sit for too long.

6-9 months: a nub of a cartilage tail starts to work it's way out of your lower back. the skin it creates is smooth and doesn't look like scarring at all. it even has some spots on it. you've started noticing freckles here and there. Your eyes are also looking different, rounder and muted color.

12 months: your doctor offers genetic testing to approximate what morph you will be, since human phenotypes aren't a 100% accurate at predicting it. You decline, you want to be surprised. You've reached a point where you can't hide it anymore if you wanted to. Your hair is falling out all over now. Your skin peels off in patches like a sunburn, and every new layer is yellow or orange and some have spots. Your teeth sit weird in your mouth and feel smaller. Your tail is about a foot long now, it has a long way to grow. You mostly cook with cricket flour or eat premixed meals since you're not fully on board with eating half your weight in straight up bugs yet, but you're relieved roaches don't freak you out anymore. They just make you hungry.

18 months: your eyes are visibly spaced further apart, and your nose is starting to flatten out. you know your face won't look 100% like you want it to, the hormones can only do so much, but you already look positively reptilian. you shaved your head to help the hair finish up, and are surprised you don't miss it. your fingers feel less nimble now, and you have to wear braces to get anything done during the day. your claws take nail polish just fine. You pick up a new space heater at the store even though it's only August.

2 years: Your skin has evened out and mostly sheds all at once now. You think you're a tangerine carrot tail, judging by how yellow and spotted your body is, but orange and white your tail is. You're comfortably at a point where people stop asking "so what are you? a lizard?" as soon as they see how fat your tail is. your dating profile pics have a little too much tongue in them.

6 years+: some surgery helped fix some of the last little snags, tucking all your bottom bits into a neat vent, and finishing the shaping on your face. You don't even scar from them either, a win-win. Your partner is now used to running you a steaming shower whenever they see you rubbing your back on the corner of a wall. They're also good at judging your diet a bit too closely thanks to your squishy fat tail. When your work got too busy for a month and you lived off tea and handfuls of grasshopper granola, they could tell you weren't yourself as your tail thinned and drooped. They scheduled some time off so the two of you could go to the desert. It's so warm, even at night, this time of year, and you can see all the stars. They didn't want to kiss you after you ate a scorpion off the floor, but it was all worth it because you felt recharged, refreshed, and at home in your gecko body again.

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just in case I never get around to drawing this I wanted to at least write it lol

#badger rants #badgerwrites #? idk i dont post writing much anymore #but i cant stop thinking about hrt that turns you into a furry. sorry i think gradual #transitions aare compelling and cool as hell. im transgender what do you want from me

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reloaderror · 6 months

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question is, will i finish this?

#who knows. certainly not me #hiraeth wa tabiji no hate #hiraeth the end of the journey #hiratabi #my art #yuhki kamatani #the idea which doesn't translate that well wo colour is that hani is the moutain ukno the one snow covered top #cloud around etcetc so imagine like white or lighter colors on top and then a gradual transition into pinks n reds to #ukno keep w the colour of the mountain is official art #will I execute this tho well that remains to be see #seen*

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marinecorvid · 3 months

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Milotic :)

p sure I’m gonna give her to Yvonne for the big xy wip. think she’s got a carotenoid variation (group of red-orange-yellow pigment) that makes more of her tail scales red than blue, but you can still kinda see which scales were supposed to be blue, they’ve got a faint plumish shimmer (idk how genetics work. it’s my fic and I get to choose what the Pokemon look like). She may have bioluminescent spots on her fins, I haven’t decided if they’re making the final cut. In the y hack I’m gonna replay through when z-a’s release date drops you can fish feebas in parfum palace and Yvonne quietly freaks about because holy shit are feebas rare and she didn’t read anything about feebas on palace grounds?? and the gang aren’t as familiar with feebas as she is so when they ask her why she’s got this weird lookin fish she shrugs and says I’ve got a good feeling about her and then she evolves at some point and Xavier immediately regrets not being so interested when she first appeared on Yvonne’s team. I think her name’s Joan

#pokemon #my art #milotic #was messing around with brushes a bit here #I do want to make the transition between her scales and the rest of her body more gradual. less of a hard stop

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quietwingsinthesky · 5 months

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was writing this down for an ask but realized i was quickly getting off topic for that ask lmao. let’s talk about Dean’s handprint, the wild misinterpretations of it, and how those have affected how people read Anna covering it during her sex scene with Dean.

We have to establish the obvious first: the number one way the handprint is misinterpreted is to establish a romantic connection between Dean and Castiel from their very first meeting. Because of how popular the ship is, we’re now left with the unfortunate aftermath of people knowing the ship first and the show second, and therefore being more inclined to interpret the show through the lens of the ship. Needless to say, while looking at season 4 through that lens for hints of destiel is fun, it doesn’t lead to a thematically cohesive reading. The handprint is the best way we can demonstrate this. If we take the handprint to indicate that Castiel has been romantically interested in Dean since minute one, or even that he sees Dean as a person rather than an instrument of Heaven’s will at first (put a pin in that), then the rest of his character arc for the season is incoherent and meaningless. To assert that this is what the handprint is about takes the conclusion Castiel needs the entirety of season 4 to reach and transplants it onto him at the very beginning in order to make it easier to find evidence for the ship.

There’s a lot of media out there where interpreting it through the lens of a ship, even one unintended by the author, can enhance the original text. (Lest we all forget our Winter Soldier roots.) Supernatural does not have that relationship to interpreting it to be about destiel. A season 4 where the handprint means Castiel is in love with Dean is a weaker story and does a huge disservice to Castiel’s actual character arc.

So, now that we’ve established what the handprint isn’t, can we talk about what it is? Yes. It’s pretty simple, actually.

Think of it this way: To Heaven, Dean is livestock, and the handprint is the brand telling everyone (but especially Dean) what ranch he belongs to.

Let’s start with the obvious: it isn’t a metaphorical brand at all. It’s literal. It’s burned into his skin permanently (or at least, when the makeup department wants to put it there.) I’d argue that from the nature of it being notable as the only scar Dean has from being raised from Hell and later showing up during his sex scene with Anna that even if we don’t see the handprint, we’re meant to interpret it as continuing to be there for… well. The rest of his life, most likely. And that’s horrifying. The handprint is telling us two things when it shows up: one, letting us know that Dean’s resurrection was intentional and through a manner we as the audience don’t have the information to guess at yet. Anyone who watched the show airing, or watches it now without knowing about angels would have assumed demonic deal intervention as being the cause of Dean’s new lease on life, and this. handily. discards that theory. But secondly, it tells us that this resurrection was violating. All resurrections on Supernatural are.

We assume from Castiel’s line, you know the one, we all know the one, Mr. Gripped-You-Tight, that he’s the one who put it there. However, to then make a further leap that it was Castiel’s personal decision to do so is, I think, a misunderstanding of his role. Take that pin out now. Dean is not a person to Castiel at this point. They’re not friends. Dean is a tool for Heaven to use, a tool that should be honored and grateful to be picked up at all. Make no mistake: Castiel branded him for Heaven, not for himself. Castiel’s a ranchhand. They aren’t in the business of letting the cows run free if they look a little sad to be slaughtered later.

Castiel needs to start here for his arc to be as impactful as it is. He can’t begin rebellious. He has to learn how to doubt. He has to develop a personal friendship with Dean that threatens his allegiance to Heaven. He has to see Anna having chosen to fall rather than obey Heaven and to be betrayed by Uriel being so desperate that he’s turned to killing their brothers and sisters trying to find a way out from under Heaven’s control.

There’s another line I think gets misinterpreted a lot in this initial meeting. “You don’t think you deserve to be saved?” On its face, easy bait for someone looking for shipping fodder, but that misses the actual point of the line. It’s a powerplay. We don’t learn until later why Dean wouldn’t think he deserves to be saved (aside from his general Winchester levels of self-esteem, but knowing that trait about him actually serves as a pretty good red herring to mask real reason Dean is thinking about himself as irredeemable now until the reveal. It’s not that Dean had a low opinion about himself in general, but that he tortured people in Hell and can never forgive himself for that.) , but Castiel does know. All of Heaven knows what Dean’s sin in Hell was. Without saying it, Castiel can remind Dean of it here. This line isn’t about Dean being so inherently good that Castiel had to rescue him. It’s about making sure Dean knows that the only way he can be ‘redeemed’ is through obedience to the heavenly powers who own his ass now. This is how he deserves to be saved. Because God commanded it. Because they have work for him.

And if he doesn’t bow? Then, as Castiel puts it in the very next episode, “I dragged you out of Hell. I can throw you back in.” This threat hanging over Dean’s head won’t go away for the rest of the season, not from Heaven. The only shift is that Castiel’s continued doubt and disobedience levels the playing field between them. They’ll both be punished, rather than Castiel taking on the role of disciplinarian. (It’s a really clever way of dealing with that power gap between them, actually. There’s always a bigger fish.)

The handprint and Castiel’s early conversations with Dean serve as a reminder of the precarious position he’s in. We shouldn’t take him ‘being saved’ at face value, no more than we should take Heaven being good just because they’re the angels in this equation as a given. Dean hasn’t been saved. He’s being used, just as much (if not arguably more) than Ruby is using Sam. (Because at least Ruby truly believes this is for Sam’s benefit, in the end.) And the worst part is how aware of it Dean is. How could he not be? His entire stint in Hell is defined by how Alistair used him. He’s just been handed off to a different owner, one that will still happily push him into the thing they ‘saved’ him from the minute it proves useful. Dean needing to torture Alistair reminds us just how little his circumstances have actually changed. He’s not allowed to say no to this.

So. The handprint is Heaven’s mark of ownership. It’s Dean’s status as their tool, their victim, burned into his flesh and inescapable. What does it mean when Anna places her hand over it?

I’ll lay my cards on the table. I’ve been thinking about this for so long because the aforementioned tendency to assume that the handprint is evidence for destiel means that the scene between Anna & Dean also gets lumped into being interpreted as more evidence for destiel. For over a decade, I have endured people joking about Anna being jealous of Cas for getting to leave a mark on their boytoy. And that’s one of the nicer things the Supernatural fandom will say about a woman who they perceive as a threat to their ship.

So, not to be rude or anything, but fuck Castiel. This ain’t about him.

This scene—It’s a lovely scene, a fantastic continuation of Dean and Anna’s previous conversation into the language of a sex scene—is about two people who have both been used and threatened by Heaven connecting over that shared trauma. Before, Anna gives space for Dean to open up about Hell, but he can’t, not yet, and though she knows what he’s gone through, she hasn’t been there herself. But when it comes to what Heaven has made of them, she does understand. It’s an incredibly vulnerable moment.

You make the handprint about Dean and Cas, and you erase what that scene is about entirely: the way Heaven’s abuse has tangled itself deep into Dean and Anna’s lives, into their bodies, and how they can resist it, if only for a few moments together.

The handprint was never about Castiel at all. It was about Heaven and its dehumanization of Dean.

#not to be annoying or anything on this wednesday morning #but uh. handprint meta.#everyone else is wrong about the handprint and what it means. except for me <3 im special and the Understander of Soup Or Natural #spn #dean winchester #anna milton #castiel spn #annadean #i really did try to keep the frustration in this to a minimum and just discuss what the handprint is #eh. arguable how well i managed that. but i think i can be forgiven after dealing with over a decade of Incorrect Handprint Takes #and im allowed to be salty down here in the tags :3 hi. hi. if you think anna touches the handprint out of jealousy you are bad at watching #shows and bad at media analysis and i hate you. personally.#god no but seriously it flattens the three of them so much to say the handprint is about cas loving dean. it really does #its a disservice to castiel’s gradual rebellion. its a disservice to dean’s struggle in s4 of transitioning from an openly abusive dynamic #in hell to one that’s trying to gaslight him into believing he’s better off under heaven’s control. its a disservice to anna and her own #trauma with heaven and the way she connects to dean through it.#number one dean/anna enjoyer and i am SICK of it. justice for the handprint scene

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starrywangxian · 11 months

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ed, my beautiful babygirl with many disorders, throwing away your leathers (and maybe the cannon ball that was used to kill you) was not the slay move you think it was. you were panicking and being whim-prone. take yor own advice!! take things slow!! dramatically ditiching the pirate life the second you find fishing cool and fun is still moving too fast !!!

if i was better with my words, i'd probably link the end of s2 e3 to this because i think ed throwing the leathers into the water was a nudge to this!!

#i've seen a lot of takes about this scene #but honestly #i don't think ed throwing away his leathers like that was a good thing #he should have gradually moved into the transition instead of diving straight into it #ofmd #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd spoilers #ofmd season 2 #ofmd 2 #our flag means death spoilers #ofmd season 2 spoilers #ofmd meta #blackbeard #ed teach #ofmd s2 e7 #edward teach #starrywangxian #you queue fine things well

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smilepaint · 6 months

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anyway the concept of passing is a scam. we will never be liberated until the idea that a trans person's inherent value and worth and validity is directly proportional to their resemblance to a cis person. and i say this not just to those who struggle to or do not fit into that box, but to those who very much do and are counting themselves lucky.

the same way that its unhealthy and unreasonable to expect a same gender couple to conform to notions of what a heterosexual family should be, its unhealthy and unreasonable to have to expect a transgender experience of identity and a transgender body to conform to a cisgender ideal. not only does it further the marginalisation of trans people and drive a wedge in our community, but it's an unhealthy way to see the world and relate to yourself. its not fair to expect a human being to go their whole life in states of checking the value of their body and their life against a societally imposed, often unattainable model that may not even reflect their own desires or goals.

it's tough, i know how tough it is to go against everything you've been taught, and the right to seek medical intervention to reshape ourselves in a way that deepens and solidifies our connection to our bodies is and will always be important. but for your own mental health, whatever shape you take must reflect yourself first. not a cis persons. transition is about making a home out of the body you're living in, in whatever way works for you.

you deserve the mental freedom that comes with removing "passing" from your emotional radar entirely. trans bodies are good bodies.

#text tag #transgender #nonbinary #transition #gender #this is kind of a loaded take so to tack on some things #i am a trans person who's struggled with severe dysphoria for many years and was obsessed with passing as cis for a long time #there was a long time in which i would've preferred to stop living over going the rest of my life with visible surgery scars #just think about that.. idk how fucked is it that teen me thought it would be better to literally die than have one clear tell that im trans #im so much happier post surgery scars and all and like yes i fucking hate them. but i know i shouldn't and im trying to heal #also im very aware that passing as cis is OFTEN a safety issue and thats not what im speaking to here #im talking about mental health and longterm societal change and the gradual betterment of gender diverse peoples #not just from a gender standpoint but honestly from a decolonial standpoint #from a te ao māori perspective there was never an ideal of passing as “cis” for trans or takatāpui individuals #anyway yea obsession with passing wears people down into self hating wrecks and im sick of seeing that happen to our youth #and to every trans person regardless of where they're at in their journey

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