#got the best fuckin top surgery ever

[dxmurei]

im posting Elohīm’s naked ref here DONT look below the cut if you dont wanna see an angel’s tdick❗️❗️❗️

[jumbled-thoughts-here]

Prince x Pirate AU

Okay so. Hello tumblr... I have lost ALL motivation to write for this au, BUT I'm just gonna lay out some of it and give fun facts >u<

In this au, Scar is a pirate and Grian is the prince he "kidnapped"- more like saved.

It's a slowburn, of course, but they do fall in love in the end!! There's also some small Redscape/Grumbo, Flower Ranchers, Shiny Duo (beginnings of a qpr), and Jizzie. There is a Clockers family dynamic, a Cub and Scar brother dynamic, and Skizz and Impulse act like fathers to everyone.

Here's my facts:

(Please note that these were written on discord to my best friend who I yap with about this a lot.. there's probably so many plot holes but WHO CARES)

Scar's Father left when he came out at 14, his mother helped him and stayed before she passed away from -- when he was 17. He gathered up close friends to start a crew of pirates with no official name, and that crew included Cleo, Bdubs, Cub, Impulse, Skizz, Gem, Joel, Mumbo, and previous member Lizzie. (Oh and Etho, but he just abandoned ship. Lizzie fell off and "drowned".) (There's also a few crappy randos)

Scar Facts: -Scar found a kingdom named Rivendell. He received top surgery there with stolen money, and he also helped Cleo, Skizz, and Joel get their surgeries. (They're all trans ok,,, shhh) -Scar has killed 20 people; the first two years he was squeamish (18 and 19), but when he turned 20 he began killing bad people and stealing mainly their riches. He avoided stealing from the poor. (Those people do not make up the entire 20..) -Scar and Mumbo had some romantic feelings for a while, but Mumbo stated that he believed Scar was fit for someone else and he couldn't handle a full-on romantic relationship. They remained qpr. -Lizzie fell into the ocean, yes, BUT… a siren found her, and felt.. mercy. They turned her into one, and she basically became the queen of the fuckin' ocean. She reunited with Scar's crew (AND JOEL YES YES YES!!) 2 years after she "died". -Scar thinks of Gem, Lizzie, Bdubs, and Cub as siblings. He sees Impulse and Skizz as father figures, and Cleo as a mother figure. He sees Joel as a best-friend/brother.

Grian Facts: -Grian is worshipped and pampered like a god, and he is seen as the embodiment of the sun. He does not see himself this way. -Grian's parents only wanted one heir and one child, so they kept Grian and sent Pearl and Jimmy away. Jimmy went to Rivendell, and he eventually found a lover (or two) and married them. Pearl went to Mythland and found a guy who became her best bud named Sausage. Grian was 16 when his siblings were taken from him.

Scar AND Grian Facts: -When Scar started the fire in the kingdom, (he's 23 at this point), he started it in Grian's parents room (Grian is 20 at this point). The guards fled and got the civilians out of the kingdom, but Grian had passed out in his room due to the smoke and was forgotten. Scar found him, though, and escaped with him over his shoulder and a ton of riches in his hands. -Grian woke up bound in rope, done by one of the crappy randos. Scar checked on him, tended to his wounds, yada yada. Cleo knitted him a sweater, Scar gave him one of his old binders that he outgrew and some shorts, and Scar also wrapped his feet since they had no shoes on board so he wouldn't get cuts on his feet. -Grian sleeps in Scar's cabin, in his bed. Scar sleeps on the damn floor. -It takes months, almost years, for Grian to adjust to Scar's crew, but he grows close to Joel, Gem, Mumbo, and especially Scar. -Grian grows feelings for Mumbo faster than he did for Scar, but Mumbo tells Grian the same thing he did for Scar and Grian is okay with it. They do kiss though. -Grian decides just randomly one day to ask Scar to kiss him. Yes, it was 1 AM. Yes, Scar was awake. And yes, they did kiss. And Scar finally got to sleep in his bed. (Scar has been sleeping on the floor of his cabin ever since he gave up his bed willingly for Grian.) -They get "married" unofficially, and Scar throws the crappy randos overboard (FINALLY.) -Grian eventually tells Scar about his siblings, and Scar helps him find them. They found Pearl first, and they have a happy reunion and Pearl joins the crew. She gets along quite well with Gem. -It takes them a while longer to find Jimmy, and boy was Grian shocked that he could pull AND that he was a king now. But, either way, Scott, the now-king and previous lone prince of Rivendell, was the officiant to Grian and Scar's wedding. -They stay a bit in Rivendell, and Joel grows close to Jimmy. (The Bad Boys become a thing now guys) -Scar finally tells Grian he killed his parents, which he hadn't done before. Grian doesn't care, neither do his siblings.

Cat Facts: -Scar had one cat, Jellie, that he had since he was 10, and he brought her aboard. He found two strays, and left them unnamed, unsure what to name them. During his travels, he found two kittens, the same breed as Jellie. He named them Katy Bee and Mr. Finnegan. When Grian came aboard, Grian named the two cats Pearl, after his sister, and Maui, who he almost named Timmy but didn't care enough to do so.

[munson-blurbs]

Chapter 5: You Don't Even Know

Collaboration with my one and only, @corroded-hellfire 💚

Series Summary: Based on the Jonas Brothers song of the same name. You and Eddie share a hospital room in the wake of Hawkins' turmoil, striking up an unlikely friendship that could lead to much more.

Chapter Summary: The road ahead after your surgery is not as smooth as you'd hoped. That means only one thing: boyfriend Eddie to the rescue.

Warnings: eventual smut (18+ only, minors DNI!), Eddie survives the Upside Down, hospital, mentions of surgery, angst, hurt/comfort, body image issues, therapy session

WC: 6.3k

Divider credit to @firefly-graphics

You take a deep breath before you speak. This could be the end of everything; your relationship with Eddie fizzling out faster than it sparked. With just one confession, you could destroy the best thing that ever happened to you. Yet something pushes you to forge ahead; you’re unsure if it’s courage or stupidity. 

“My cousin’s been staying with us,” you start. “She’s never been nice to me; kind of a bully, actually. The night of the…earthquake…she asked me if I was still dancing, and when I said yes, she just laughed and said, ‘I thought ballerinas were supposed to be skinny.’

“I went to the studio that night—I know where the owner keeps her spare key—and I brought a bottle of vodka with me. I just sat there and drank until the room was spinning, trying to forget what she said. And then everything started shaking and rattling, and by the time I realized it wasn’t just in my head, a beam fell from the ceiling and landed right on my leg.” The confession pours out of you, shame filling your body until it’s too stifling to ignore. “It sounds so stupid now that I say it out loud.”

Eddie rests his hand on top of yours, giving a little squeeze. “‘S not stupid, baby,” he murmurs, rubbing his thumb along your trembling knuckles. “I mean, I completely disagree with you, but that’s because I can clearly see how gorgeous you are.”

“Eddie…” you resist the urge to roll your eyes at his compliment, but the whine in your voice gives away your disbelief. 

“No, I’m serious. But I get it, I think.” He scrunches his nose in contemplation. “Because the thought of you seeing my scars, like, up close and personal…make me so fuckin’ nervous.” He uses his free hand to tug at the hem of his shirt as though he’s subconsciously trying to cover himself up more. 

You shake your head. “It’s impossible for any part of you to not be beautiful,” you tell him. Just the thought of him without his shirt on makes you flush with warmth, reminding you of another reason you wish your injuries could just heal. 

“Well, Sunshine, now you know how I feel about you.” Eddie leans in and plants a smacking kiss on your lips, punctuating it with a mwah! “Beautiful, beautiful, my beautiful girl.”

“I just can’t believe that a guy like you thinks I’m beautiful,” you muse, equally to yourself and to him. 

Your boyfriend—God, it feels good to refer to him like that—stares at you incredulously. “A guy like me?” he scoffs. 

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“Um, kinda?” Eddie gives a little laugh. “I mean, I’m a decent dude, but I’m not some cool, macho guy like…I dunno, Steve Harrington, or something.”

You squeeze his hand and smile. “Don’t want Steve Harrington. I want Eddie Munson: the sweetest, bravest, most incredible man I’ve ever met.” You cock your head teasingly. “Unless you think I should be with Steve? I mean, since he’s so cool and everything—”

“Nope!” Eddie chirps, bringing your hand to his mouth and fake biting it with his lips. “All mine. Forever. No refunds.” The brightness in his eyes fades to concern when he notices that you’ve stopped giggling. “Talk to me, babe. ‘S okay.”

You purse your lips in an attempt to stave off the tears. “I just…I can’t believe I ruined my dream because of some bullshit comment.”

Eddie kisses your palm, sending tingles down your spine. “Hey, hey…there’s still hope. Don’t throw it away yet, baby. You’ve got one more surgery plus physical therapy. And your beautiful boyfriend will be there with you every step of the way.”

Giving him a small smile, you bring Eddie’s hand up to your lips and press kisses on any inch of skin not covered by his chunky rings. “Promise? Promise that my beautiful boyfriend will be there?”

“I’ll be cheering you on the whole time. Might even bring pom poms and everything.”

That gets a small burst of laughter out of you, which Eddie takes as a win. He laces his fingers with yours and runs his thumb over the soft skin on the back of your hand. 

“Everything is going to be okay,” he vows. 

After Eddie leaves (he has to practically be chased out by the hospital staff), you’re sitting in your room and flipping through a magazine from January 1982. There’s a soft knock at the door, and you look up with a genuine smile. 

Mandy walks over to you, stapled sheets of paper in her outstretched hand. 

“What’s that?”

She smiles kindly. “Given the nature of your injuries and the trauma from your second surgery, Dr. Sanoj is recommending that you speak to a therapist,” she explains. “There’s a signed referral and a list of recommended—”

“Don’t need it,” you interrupt coldly. You feel bad; the nurse hasn’t done anything to warrant such a frigid attitude, but you can’t bite it back. “I’m fine. I just need to get through this last surgery and I’ll be on my way.”

“Okay,” Mandy says, keeping her grin a bit more tight-lipped, “well, I’ll just leave it here,” she places it on the dresser with a small pat, “in case you change your mind.”

The second she leaves, you lunge for the papers, crinkling them into a ball and tossing them in the nearby trash can. Therapy? It isn’t bad enough that your leg is busted; now they think there’s something wrong with your brain, too? No, you don’t need therapy. You need to be home, in your own bed, getting back to life as you once knew it. Therapy is only going to keep you stuck in the past; you need to move forward. 

When Eddie walks into your room the next morning, it brings a much needed smile to your face. Sleeping in a hospital is next to impossible, and now after so long like that, you’re pretty sure you don’t remember what a good night’s rest feels like. 

“There’s my girl,” Eddie says as he takes a seat in the chair next to your bed. “How ya feeling today?”

“Better now,” you tell him. He slips his hand into yours and leans back as you channel surf, trying to find something decent to watch. “It’s a shame the soaps aren’t on during the weekends.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I can recount everything you’ve missed,” Eddie says, throwing you a wink. He leans even farther back, the chair resting on just its back two legs when something catches his notice in his peripheral vision. Lowering the chair, he takes a proper look at what caught his eye, and sees a few pieces of crumpled paper in the trash can. It’s mostly too folded and creased to see what they are, but the word “therapists” is bolded on a crinkle facing his direction. 

Eddie doesn’t want to be nosy, but his curiosity gets the better of him and he pulls the paper ball from the garbage. You’re too focused on the episode of Alf and laughing at the alien puppet making another joke about eating a cat to notice Eddie smoothing out the papers in his lap. 

“Sunshine?”

“What, you’ve never seen Alf?” you ask, never taking your eyes off of the television. “He’s not actually going to eat any cats.”

“No, it’s just…what’s this?”

Turning your head away from the screen, your face drops when you see what Eddie’s been looking at. It was bad enough the hospital staff thought that you had something wrong with your brain, now your new boyfriend is going to see all this and think it too. 

“They, uh… Um, Mandy brought me that yesterday. I guess the doctor wanted me to talk about all the shit that’s gone down with a therapist.” You shrug, leaning back against your pillows. “But I don’t need that.”

Eddie doesn’t want to push you. He knows you’re a grown woman who can make her own decisions, but he’s worried. 

“You need to take care of yourself, baby.” Eddie sighs and gives your hand a squeeze. “Please.”

Frowning, you look down at the papers in his lap and then back up to his face. “Why do you think I’m not taking care of myself? I’m in the hospital. Where else could I go to get better taken care of?”

“No,” Eddie says, shaking his head. “I mean, mentally.”

A bubble of anger starts to grow in your chest. “Why does everyone think I’m crazy?”

“Sunshine, no one thinks you’re crazy. There’s just been so much happening in such a short period of time. You’ve experienced a rollercoaster of emotions and this could help you feel better.”

“Eddie, there are people who lost their homes. Their loved ones. Why would a therapist want to talk to someone who’s only hurt because she was wasted at the wrong time?”

“Baby,” Eddie says, his voice kind but firm. “I don’t want to fight with you. I just…I’d like you to reconsider. This isn’t because anyone thinks you’re crazy. I promise. It’s because you’ve been through a lot, sweetheart. Yeah, a lot of us have, but I’m concerned about you right now. It would make me feel better.”

You don’t intend to snap at him. He’s only trying to look out for you, and you know that. But it also feels like he isn’t listening to you and it’s frustrating. “Why don’t you go to therapy then?”

“I…I do.”

That shuts you up. Shame fills your body as you shift yourself on the bed. You were just crapping all over therapy and talking about it being for crazy people when your perfectly wonderful boyfriend sees a therapist. 

“I didn’t know that,” you admit in a soft voice. 

“Well,” Eddie says, scratching the back of his neck. “‘S not like it’s something I go around talking about to hot girls I’m forced to be roommates with.”

His humor takes some of the sting out of the shame. He can’t be too upset with you then. 

“I started going after my dad left. All the social workers said it would be a good idea for me. I begged Wayne not to take me ‘cause I didn’t wanna spend time with some strange adult that I didn’t know. Besides…I felt the same way as you. Like, I have my uncle, who actually takes care of me. Why should a shrink waste her time talking to me when she could be helping kids who didn’t have anyone? But I’ll tell you what. It helped. I became less angry, more happy. Therapy turned me into the sexy goofball you see here before you.”

A small laugh bubbles out of you and it brings a smile to Eddie’s face. 

“Please, baby?” Eddie gives you his best puppy dog eyes and you let out an annoyed groan.

“You know I’m a sucker for those eyes! That’s not fair. But fine. Yes, I will go to therapy.”

“Thank you, sweetheart.” Eddie picks up your hand and presses a kiss to the back of it. “I’m proud of you.”

“I didn’t do anything yet,” you argue, but he just silences your protest by pushing his lips against yours. You melt into him, reveling in the warmth you feel when he’s near. 

“So, how are you feeling today?”

Well, isn’t that the million dollar question. 

You look at the therapist, Sophie, sitting in the chair opposite the sofa you’re slouched into. “I dunno.”

You expect her to purse her lips, maybe peer over her glasses in admonishment, but she just nods. “Makes sense. You’ve been through a lot. It’s normal for our emotions to be scattered after a while.”

“Mhm,” you chew on the thought, trying to hide your surprise. “Sometimes…like, okay, I have this boyfriend. His name is Eddie, and we actually met here. In the hospital.”

Sophie offers an encouraging smile. “Tell me about Eddie.”

And so you do. You tell her everything—minus the whole alternate dimension ordeal—noticing the way your lips tug upwards as you describe how loving and caring he is. 

“But even with him, it’s like…things that made me happy just…don’t anymore. And I don’t wanna pretend like I’m happy when I’m sad, but I also don’t wanna constantly bring him down, y’know?”

“Absolutely. Have you talked to Eddie about this?”

“Kind of? He’s the one who encouraged me to see you, actually,” you admit. “I’m not used to asking people for help.”

Sophie nods again, kindness evident in her expression. “It’s hard to do. But I promise you, you’re stronger because of it. And talking to a therapist also allows you to talk to Eddie about happier things, because your mind won’t be so preoccupied.”

You consider this. “I never thought about it that way,” you muse. “Thank you.”

“That’s my job.” Sophie grins. “Now, whenever you’re ready, we can talk about your injury.”

There’s a long pause before you speak again, swallowing slowly. “Okay,” you finally say. “I’m ready.”

In the week since you began therapy you don’t feel like your journey is over by any means. But there’s a certain lightness about you. It could be just knowing that Sophie is kind and compassionate and willing to listen to you. Maybe it’s because, like she said, you could talk with Eddie about happier things now. Whatever it is, it’s led you to feeling more prepared for your final surgery. 

Laying in your bed in your room, your mom and Eddie sit with you while you wait for them to bring you down to the operating room. Your mom works on some knitting where she sits near the foot of the bed, and Eddie holds your hand from his spot up near your head. 

“This is it,” Eddie says, giving your hand a squeeze. “After this, it’s a few days in recovery and then you get to go home.”

Shrugging one shoulder, you reply, “But I’ll still have, like, a million years of PT.”

“And I’ll be cheerin’ you on the whole time. Pom-poms and everything.” 

The mental picture of Eddie shaking pom-poms while you’re trying to get strength back in your leg has you letting out a small giggle. 

“What’s so funny?” your boyfriend asks.

“Nothing,” you answer. “Just glad to have my own personal cheerleader.”

“Well, you need some motivation. If it’s not me coming up with little dance routines to entertain you, what would it be?” Eddie’s smirk is playful and it makes you want to kiss it off his face. Which reminds you of what that other motivation could be. 

“I think I’ll be plenty motivated,” you tell him in a hushed tone. “Gotta get some strength back so you and I can have some fun.”

Eddie’s eyes widen and it takes everything in him not to look over his shoulder at your mom. But the way his eyes dart in her direction has you basically reading his thoughts. Are you crazy? In front of your mother?

“Uh,” Eddie says with an awkward chuckle. “You and I have fun all the time, Sunshine.”

Your mom’s voice startles the both of you. “We both know that’s not what she means.”

The door to your room opens and two orderlies come in to wheel you down for surgery.

“Oh, thank God,” you breathe out, willing your face to cool down. 

“We’ll be right here when you wake up,” Eddie promises, and your mom squeezes your hand, careful of the IV. “Just, maybe wake up a little faster this time?”

You giggle and roll your eyes. “I’ll do my best.”

Eddie looks like he wants to say something else, but he just manages a tiny smile before the nurses take you into the OR. 

Breathe in, breathe out. Just a few more hours and I’ll be reunited with Eddie. 

“Sunshine? Sunshine, are you awake?”

The sound of Eddie’s voice sounds too distant, and you practically have to claw your way out of the anesthesia fog back to reality’s surface. 

“I think she’s starting to wake up,” you hear him saying, though you’re not sure who he’s talking to. “Sunshine, take your time, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

You take that as permission to fall back to sleep, body not yet ready to shake off the drowsiness. When you wake up again, your throat feels like sandpaper. 

“E-Eddie?” you manage, wincing at the scratchiness in your voice. 

“Sunshine,” he breathes a slow exhale of relief, rushing to your bedside. He grabs your hand and rests his forehead against it. “Baby, oh, thank fucking God. I was so scared you wouldn’t wake up again.”

You use your tongue to coat your chapped lips with whatever saliva you can, though it isn’t much. “Water.” It’s all you can choke out. 

Eddie nods, reaching under his seat and grabbing a half-full bottle of Poland Spring. “Hope you don’t mind my cooties,” he jokes lamely, but you’re too parched to even pay attention. You chug the remaining water as quickly as you can, which isn’t too fast, considering all of your muscles are still weakened. 

“Th-Thanks,” you mumble as he takes the empty bottle from you. “Was it…did it work?”

Eddie smiles. “Doc said it was a success. Just a couple months of PT and you’ll be good as new.”

“‘Good as new?’” you question disbelievingly. 

His cheeks tinge pink. “Okay, maybe that’s just me hyping you up. But the rest of it was word-for-word.” He presses a soft kiss to your cheek. “‘M so glad you’re okay, Sunshine. Don’t wanna lose you now that you’re mine.”

You squint to try and read the clock hanging on the wall. “What time is it?”

“3:45 AM.”

Your eyes nearly pop out of your head. “How are you still awake?!”

Eddie chuckles, kissing your hand. “Your mom and I have been taking turns grabbing coffee. That’s actually where she is now.” 

As if on cue, your mom appears with two steaming paper cups, one in each hand. She almost drops them both when she sees you. Her eyes well with tears, and she’s rendered speechless, putting down the coffee cups to pull you into a hug. 

“Hi, Mom,” you say as she squeezes you gently in her arms. 

“Oh, my baby,” she coos. Reluctantly, she lets go and presses a kiss to the top of your head. “You look good! And the doctor said that everything—”

“Eddie told me,” you say with a sheepish grin. “Can I, um, have one of those coffees?”

Both your mom and Eddie give you skeptical looks. Eddie cocks an eyebrow while your mother crosses her arms over her chest; a long cry from the loving embrace you just received. 

“Coffee? Sweetheart, you just got out of surgery,” your mom says, as if you’d forgotten.

“Yeah, and they make you fast before surgery, not after,” you retort. 

“Why do you want coffee?” Eddie asks. 

Shrugging your shoulders, you find that your muscles are more tense and stiff from laying down so long than you’d previously thought. “Wanna stay up and talk with you guys.”

“You need coffee for that?” your mom questions, slightly defensive. 

“When I’m tired I do,” you grit out, getting a little irritated by all the questions. You just want some damn coffee, you’re not asking them to score you some cocaine or anything. 

“Sunshine,” Eddie says in that tone of voice that begs you to agree with him. “You need to rest. Your body’s just been through a lot—not to mention all it’s been through before. Either me or your mom will always be here when you wake up. You don’t have to talk with us now. Try and get some sleep.”

The instinct is to push back, to challenge him that you know your body and what it can handle. But between his adamant voice, him having a point, plus the fact that you really are tired, you cave. Settling back against your pillows—but not without a small huff so they’re both aware of your dissatisfaction—you make yourself comfortable in the small hospital bed. After a moment of deliberation, you hold your hand out towards Eddie.

“Compromise. I’ll try and sleep if you hold my hand until I get there.”

A soft smile overtakes Eddie’s features as he slips his ring-clad hand into your own. “I think I can live with that arrangement.”

The hospital needs to keep you for a few more days before you can be discharged. You can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel, but you feel like you have to run for it and running isn’t something you’re capable of at the moment. The good news is that you’ve been moved back into your old room and get to share with Max again. Her condition has definitely improved since you last saw her, but you didn’t know her before any of this so it’s hard to tell if she’s back to her usual self or not. The way she teases Eddie for never leaving your side has you thinking this is her regular ol’ personality shining through. 

Someone comes in everyday to help you with physical therapy. Sometimes it’s a breeze, other times you want to punch the poor guy helping you when he says, “Just five more minutes!”

You do all of this on a leg that was shattered not too long ago, you think bitterly. See how slow five minutes really is. 

“So, I haven’t seen this physical therapist guy,” Max says one day after your session, “but I’m guessing he has two perfectly good legs that weren’t crushed and operated on?”

“You would be correct,” you say as you resituate yourself in bed. Asshole, you think—even though you know it’s not true and he’s a very nice man.

“Wait, me or the guy?” Max asks. Oh, shit. You must’ve said it out loud by accident.

“Never you, Max. Sometimes I feel you’re the only one who gets me,” you tell her.

“Hey, I take offense to that,” Eddie says as he strolls into the hospital room, a gaggle of four teenage boys and one girl following in behind him. He plants a smacking kiss to your scalp and you giggle. “How’re you doing, Red?” he asks Max. 

“Pretty good,” she says, a smile tugging on her lips. She pauses for a second. “Not as good as you two, though,” she adds mischievously. 

Before you can ask her to elaborate, one of the boys takes her hand and kisses her cheek, and you watch her melt in his embrace. That must be Lucas, you surmise. 

“Yep, this is Lucas,” Max chirps, beaming. It’s almost as if she—

“Hey, Casanova,” a scrawny, floppy haired boy calls from behind Eddie, “you wanna introduce us to your girlfriend?”

Eddie grins. “Yeah, of course. Guys, this is Sunshine. My girlfriend.” He enunciates the title proudly. “Sunshine, this is Mike Wheeler and Lucas Sinclair. You’ve already had the displeasure of meeting Henderson,” he stops to see Dustin flip him the bird, “and these are two of their friends, Will Byers and Jane Hopper. But, uh, I’ve been told that she also goes by El.”

“Nice to meet you all.” You offer your real name, trying to keep Sunshine as Eddie’s special nickname for you. “Eddie never stops talking about how amazing his friends are, so it’s great to put faces to the names.”

“Well, Eddie hasn’t stopped telling us about this incredible girl he calls Sunshine,” Lucas says from Max’s bedside, teasing Eddie more than you. “We figured we should get to know her for ourselves.”

“And see if she was real,” Mike pipes up, the tiniest semblance of a grin on his face. 

Eddie throws his arms up in exasperation. “Jesus H. Christ! I mean, Henderson met her, and you still didn’t believe me?”

“I knew she was real,” Dustin offers, raising two fingers slightly. 

“Thank y—”

“However, you guys weren’t dating then, so I needed confirmation that she’s actually your girlfriend.”

Eddie grits his teeth and rolls his eyes. “I hate you all so much.”

The boy who Eddie introduced as Will Byers gives you a small smile. “You’re a dancer, right?”

“I used to be,” you murmur, trying not to think of how basic flexibility tasks are now too strenuous for you to complete. “Maybe I will be again someday.”

El sits by your bedside and gently touches your hand before glancing up at Eddie. “She is beautiful,” she says to him, and Eddie’s entire face flushes pink. 

“Okay, thank you all for thoroughly embarrassing me,” Eddie grumbles. “Why don’t you little sheep go take Red on a field trip to the cafeteria so I can get some time with my girl?”

Mike frowns. “But I’m not—”

“Wheeler, I swear to Ozzy that if you try and say you’re not hungry, I’m going to tell every girl in this town about the time you accidentally wore one of Nancy’s blouses to school.”

That gets them moving, the gang helping Max into a wheelchair. As she approaches Eddie, she reaches out to him pulls him close enough for her to whisper. 

“Just tell her, you idiot,” she says firmly. 

Eddie’s startled by her frankness. “Tell who, what?”

“Tell Sunshine that you love her.”

“How did you—okay, we’re gonna need to talk about this later,” he stammers, ushering the kids out into the hallway. He plops on top of the hospital bed and leans up, kissing you until you’re smiling too hard to continue. 

“I like your friends,” you tell him once your lips part. “Especially Lucas. He seems really sweet with Max.”

“Yeah, that boy’s got it bad,” Eddie jokes, hoping you don’t call him out on his hypocrisy. 

Luckily, you seem to skim over Eddie’s own head-over-heels behavior. “Speaking of Max—what did she say to you when she was leaving?”

“N-Nothing, just some weird freshman humor I guess,” he stammers. Now would be the opportune moment to admit his true feelings, but he can’t work up the courage. Soon, he tells himself. I’ll tell her soon. 

The day that seemed like it would never come has finally arrived. Your discharge papers should be brought up at any moment for you to sign off on, then you’re good to go. It’s been so long you almost forget what your own bedroom looks like. What you do remember is that your bed is big enough to fit both you and Eddie in it. 

Speak of the devil… Eddie plops down next to you where you’re seated on your hospital bed. A flowy sundress was the easiest item to get on without irritating your legs and your boyfriend hasn’t been able to keep his eyes off of you since he’s seen it. 

“Excited to be going home?” Max asks from her bed.

“I am,” you say. “It feels weird, honestly. I haven’t even seen the sun in months, except for what peeks through the window. Now I get to actually step outside.”

“Well,” Eddie says. “You can be wheeled out into the sun. Hospitals won’t just let you walk out.” 

“They need to stop fussing over me—they’ve done it long enough,” you say, waving a dismissive hand towards the larger hospital outside your door. 

“Now it’s my turn,” Eddie says, tugging down the sleeve of your dress to press a soft kiss to your shoulder. The feeling of his lips on your skin sends a shiver up your spine, which Eddie notices with a look of glee. 

“Ya know,” you say, nudging Eddie gently in the ribs. “You and Wayne can come stay at my house. I know the trailer’s almost all fixed up now and that you might be able to move back in a few weeks, but at my place at least you’d have a real bed instead of Gareth’s couch. And Wayne would have the whole guest room and bathroom to himself.”

Eddie’s brow pinches in slight confusion. “You only have the one guest room, though, right? So, how would I also have a bed?”

“Oh my God,” Max groans. “I’m pretty sure your girlfriend is saying you can sleep in her bed with her, Loverboy.”

Eddie’s face tinges with pink as he looks from her to you. “I-Is that what you meant?”

“Yeah,” you say, a shy smile quirking up the corners of your mouth. “Only if you want to, of course. I get it if you’d rather stay with your best friend and not want to lug all your stuff around when you’re just going to have to do it again in a few weeks.”

“No, no,” Eddie says quickly, shaking his hand as he lifts your hand in his own. “I would love to come stay with you. Gareth’s great but if I have to try and fall asleep to him playing his damn video games on more time, I’m gonna shove his drumsticks somewhere in his body. And his mom’s been driving Wayne crazy, too. She doesn’t like having beer in the house and she practically force feeds the man vegetables when all he wants is meat.” 

“Guess we’ll be roomies again, huh?” The smile is starting to ache your cheeks, but you couldn’t care less. Eddie goes to reply, but he’s cut off by Mandy stepping into the room with a clipboard full of papers. 

“And here we are,” the peppy nurse says. “Everything is all good to go and I just need you to sign by the X’s.”

“Gladly,” you murmur as you practically snatch the pen off of the clipboard. 

“And your chariot awaits,” Mandy says once you hand the completed papers back to her. An orderly comes in pushing a wheelchair and Eddie’s quick to help you get settled in it. 

“Oh,” you say when Eddie begins to start pushing you. When you gesture towards Max, he wheels you over so you’re able to take the girl’s pale hand in your own. “I really liked being your roommate, Max. And as long as I can get someone to schlep me around, I’ll be here to visit you. And when you get out, we’re gonna come up with schemes to get our boyfriends to buy us stuff.” This is said with a mischievous sparkle in your eye as you glance up at Eddie.

“I already have a few tricks that work for that,” Max says. “Don’t worry, I’ll teach you my ways.”

You chuckle and give her hand a soft squeeze before letting Eddie wheel you out of the room and out of the hospital for your first time in months. So much has happened and changed since you first went in. You have all these new friends and the best boyfriend you could ever ask for. The dark days you’ve gone through would have been far darker were it not for them. 

“How is it?” Eddie asks as he helps you into your mom’s car. It was much easier to get you into this than up in Eddie’s van with your injuries. “Life on the outside?”

“You make it sound like I was serving time in a prison.”

“As you should, you thief.” Eddie closes the passenger side door before you can ask him what he means, but he picks right back up where he left off when he slides into the driver’s seat. “For stealing my heart.”

“Oh, Jesus,” you say through a laugh. “I notice you save the corny and cheesy stuff until we’re alone.”

“Well, duh,” Eddie says as he starts the car. “Can’t have everyone knowing the resident freak is a moony-eyed schoolboy over his girlfriend.”

“Schoolboy, huh?” you question with a smirk. “Wouldn’t happen to have a uniform, would you?”

“Who would’ve thought my Sunshine is kinky?”

You slowly lean over to kiss the spot below his ear. “Just wait until I get the all clear from the doctor,” you tease. 

“Fuck, Sunshine,” Eddie hisses, adjusting himself in his pants. “Y’can’t do this to me.” 

“Sorry,” you shrug, leaning back in the seat and getting comfortable, or as comfortable as you can be given the throbbing in your leg. 

“Real convincing,” he grumbles, but he presses a wet kiss to your cheek before pulling away from the hospital. With the building literally and figuratively in the rearview mirror, a weight is lifted from your shoulders. You’re free. 

Well, almost. 

Though you’re no longer bound to the hospital, you still have physical therapy three times a week. It’s exhausting and often disheartening, especially compared to your agility before the accident. 

Eddie, as always, is your saving grace. He’s with you every step of the way. Usually, his enthusiasm motivates you, but on one particular day, your frustration gets the better of you. 

You’re trying—and utterly failing—to keep your balance on your bad leg when Eddie calls out, “you got this, babe; I believe in you!”

“Stop it!” you snap, putting your weight back on your stronger foot. “Just…just stop lying to me, Eddie!” Tears well up in your eyes, and you hastily brush them away. 

His brows crease in confusion. “I’m not lying to you,” he insists, hopping off of the equipment he’s been sitting on. “Sunshine, you’re amazing. I can’t believe how much progress you’ve made.”

“It’s true,” your physical therapist, Paul, pipes up. “You’ve exceeded all expectations. It’s remarkable, actually.”

“Then why can’t I even balance on this foot? I used to be able to do pirouettes and a la seconds without a problem, and now I’m hobbling around like a little old lady!” At this rate, you’d never be able to make a comeback to dance. You’d be lucky if you could walk without tripping over your own feet. 

Eddie takes your hands in his, pressing his lips to your forehead. “You’ve gotta cut yourself some slack,” he gently reminds you. “You’re only human—a human who happened to be injured in a serious, um, earthquake.” His eyes meet Paul’s and they share a moment of recognition before the therapist gives you two a moment of privacy. 

“Sunshine, come here.” Eddie takes a seat in a chair and gently maneuvers you into his lap. One of his arms wraps securely around your waist while the other traces patterns on top of your sweatpant-covered thigh. “I know you’re frustrated. Have you been talking about it in therapy?”

“Yeah,” you say. There’s a moment of you picking at the collar of Eddie’s Dio t-shirt before you continue speaking. “Sophie encourages me. But we also talk about what life would be like if I never get back to my old strength.”

“And what would that look like?” Eddie asks.

Sighing, you shake your head before burying it in Eddie’s neck. “Don’t wanna talk about it,” you mumble against his skin. 

“Hey.” Eddie rubs one hand soothingly up and down your back. “You’re still you no matter what, sweetheart. I know you want to get back to where you were before the accident, but even if you can’t, there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“I know,” you say. And logically, you do. But the emotional part of your brain can’t seem to accept that. It’s revolting against the idea of you not being the immaculate dancer that you were before. But you’ve been through a lot and you need to give yourself grace—dear lord, Sophie’s words are starting to sink in. 

“I fell for you when you couldn’t even get out of your bed,” Eddie reminds you. “I didn’t give a shit one way or the other because I was too busy looking at how beautiful you are and mesmerized by your kindness.”

“Eddie,” you say with a shake of your head. 

“What? You don’t believe me? Trust me?”

“Of course I trust you. I just think you’re trying to make me feel better,” you admit with a shrug. 

“I mean, I am, but only by telling you the truth. Sunshine, I don’t think you understand everything that you’ve done for me. When I was rolled into that room, everyone thought I was a murderer, but you were nice to me from the moment I came to. You gave me your jello, for Christ sake. You were so kind. You didn’t even hesitate.”

“You helped me too, you know.” Moving your gaze up from the pale expanse of his neck, you meet his eyes as you look up at him from beneath your eyelashes. “Every single time I felt like crying, you made me smile. I couldn’t have gotten through these shitty days without you.”

“We make a good team, huh?” Eddie asks you, a playful smile dancing on his lips. “Look at us. We started off as strangers and now…I think I love you.”

The admission has tears springing to your eyes and it’s the first time in a while they’re not from frustration. The grip you have on Eddie tightens, as if you’re afraid he’ll disappear into thin air after he’s made this confession.

“You love me?” The words come out barely louder than a breath, but he still hears them. 

“Yes,” Eddie says, more confident in his answer now that it’s already out there. “I love you. So fucking much, Sunshine.”

“I love you too.” The words feel right falling from your lips; like you were always meant to say them to him in this moment. Leaning forward, you let your forehead rest against his. Slightly chapped lips meet your own and the two of you exchange the softest and lightest of kisses. 

“All right, my love,” Eddie laughs. “Y’ready to kick some more ass?”

You look into his beautiful brown eyes and nod. “Yeah,” you murmur, clearing your throat to stand firmer in your answer. “I got this.”

--

taglist: @thebrookemunson, @mystars123, @h-ness1944, @hazydespair, @ajkamins, @aysheashea, @jasminelafleur, @brittney69, @arsonfrogger, @brassreign, @lunarzstarz, @aftermidnightwriting, @justtryingtobecreative, @micheledawn1975, @kailynn-exe @afunkyfreshblog @fangirling-4-ever @crimsonsabbath @babyexpertlampskeleton @whenshelanded @ches-86 @acmbooksfilmtelevisionandreads

[bawltongue]

ROOMMATES - Pt 2

(jonathan davis x stealth transmasc reader <on t, post op top surgery>. takes place in early 90s, very beginning of korn. reader gets notice by landlord that they will have to share their space with a new roommate- that being jd. despite the readers initial lack of excitement, they get to know each other and develop a mutual liking)

18+ !!!!!!!

warning: substance use, lots of swearing, sexual tension, general faggotry

The morning following your tender night with Jon, you were awoken by the feeling of him unconciously slinging his leg over you. You were completely entangled in his grasp; arms clasped around your chest, leg slung over yours, the sound of his soft snores against the back of your head. Entrapped, yet you didn’t mind one bit. You were beaming uncontrollably before you were even fully concious. It felt so good to know someone you liked so much felt the same way about you. You laid in his clutches for a few extra minuets until the heat from his body and the blankets became a bit too much, causing you to try your best to inch away without waking him. The moment you slipped out from his arms, he whined drowsily.

“Mmm, no…” he groaned out in a sleepy, raspy voice. Eyes still closed. “Come back.”

You let out a light chuckle, turning toward him to see him sprawled out and half asleep still. His long, thin limbs outstretched toward you in an awkward position. “Sleep… please, Y/N.…” He muttered out. He looks so fucking cute. You couldn’t stop staring at him. His chest hair poking out of the top of the blanket, dreads messily encompassing his face, his stubble coming through.

“I want to, Jon… but I think you’re forgetting you have rehearsal today. Remember? I uh, wanted to tag along this time.”

He perked up a little and rolled onto his stomach groggily, holding his chin up with his hand and opening his eyes to look at you. A sliver of light that shone in through a broken blind lit his tired eyes up and made them appear like they were almost sparkling. It gave you butterflies to be making eye contact. You just found him to be so beautiful; and now you can allow yourself to express it as such. Leaning over the bed, you planted a soft kiss on his forehead.

“You’re finally gonna come?” He grinned showcasing his signature crooked teeth.

“Mhm. I’ve wanted to since you brought it up, I just never went ‘cause I didn’t wanna seem annoying.” You went over to your closet and started shifting through clothes, trying to find something subtly cool enough to impress his bandmates. He sighed, upset slightly that you would’ve ever thought he’d find you annoying.

“Anyways, it’s already like, two. I dunno what time-“

“Oh shit!” Jon sprung up clumsily and shoved his face into the clock on your dresser. “Fuck, okay, get dressed quick. We gotta bounce ASAP.”

He zipped past you and into the living room where his things were to throw on some random articles of clothing. You could hear him cursing under his breath from your room while you got changed. It was stressing you out a bit. Jonathan hadn't particularly struck you to be the most punctual guy. You grabbed your wallet and keys before walking out into the living room to catch up with him. With a death grip on your wrist, he pulled you outside and to his car. On the drive there, he was rambling about the songs they were writing, his bandmates and how they met, breaking down their personalities for you so you weren’t thrown for a loop. He was clearly teeming with nervous excitement to finally have you witness him sing with his band.

“Do you think your friends will like me?” You quietly asked, bouncing your leg with anxiety.

“Of course they fuckin’ will! ‘Cause I like you.” He raised his eyebrows and smiled at you, momentarily taking his eyes off the road to reassure you. “You’re likable… and cool. If anything, I’m more worried that you won’t like them.” He came to a harsh break at a stop sign and turned toward you, a soft and sympathetic expression on his face. “You’re gonna do fine. I know you get anxious about social stuff, but I promise. They’re just a couple ah weird dudes. It’ll be like chillin with a bunch of monkeys that play instruments and drink beer.” He beat his chest and howled like an ape to make you laugh; it worked.

For the remainder of the car ride, he held your hand in his, intertwining your fingers and rubbing his thumb across your knuckles. Initially you were hesitant to be the one to grab his hand, but he shamelessly snatched yours up once he saw your fingers twitch. The sweaty palms didn’t deter him from wanting to keep your fingers laced as long as possible. The two of you pulled up into the driveway of a relatively small home. The garage was wide open, revealing three men sitting in a circle drinking beers around various instruments. The one who had a series of braids sticking out of his head stood up and waved cartoonishly with both arms.

“JOOOON! YOU’RE LATE, BITCH!” He ran up to the car and beat on the drivers’ side window. Jon turned toward you, quickly uttering “That’s Brian” before opening up the car door and embracing his friend. You felt your heart rate increase at the thought of interacting with a new group of people. All you could do is stand by the car and silently observe. They briefly caught up and exchanged friendly banter. You were trying to learn their names through the conversation.

“Where’s Fieldy, ya’ll?” Jon questioned.

“Muthafuckin’ late again of course.” The one Jon had referred to as David responded, a wide cheeky grin on his face. Jon was so stressed out about being late, but the guys didn’t really seem to care nearly as much as he did.

“It’s cool, we’ve just been cracking into the beers he left last sesh until you guys showed up. Here.” The one with dreads slurred out, handing a beer to Jon. “Hey man, want one?” He gestured toward you, holding a can and smiling sweetly. It snapped you out of your silent observation and you walked toward him, forcing a smile on your face as you grabbed it. “Thanks brother, I appreciate it.”

“No prob man. Names’ James, but you can call me Munky.” He drunkenly fist bumped the hand you had clasped over your beer. “That goofy motherfucker is Head, and that’s David.” He pointed to his friends who both enthusiastically waved at you. Jon was smiling uncontrollably as he pulled up a chair behind you for you to sit in and join.

“Cool. M’ names Y/N. It’s dope to finally meet you guys.” You nodded your head and cracked your beer open, taking a seat. Jonathan sat on the ground criss cross between you and Head.

“We know. Jon talks about you like, a lot. Woulda assumed he was tuggin’ on your nuts behind the scenes.-”

“Oh yeah, we go at it fuckin’ hard.” Jon smacked Heads’ shin making a goofy expression. “Shut the hell up before I tug your nuts.” You couldn’t suppress the heat in your face. It was really cute that Jon talked about you so much to his closest friends. You laughed awkwardly and took a sip of your beer, patting Jons head. He threw his head back and looked up at you. “See? A bunch of fuckin’ morons.” He slyly winked.

For the next forty five minuets until Fieldy arrived, the boys made a conscious effort to make you feel comfortable. They talked about their instruments, tattoos, cracked jokes and tried to make you laugh as much as they could. A couple beers in and you found yourself feeling significantly more comfortable then expected. They really made you feel like part of the group and seemed to enjoy your company despite your somewhat reserved nature. Jon was beaming with excitement every time you commented, laughed or interjected. You had learned how they came to be a band and their first impressions of Jon; listening to them reminisce was really sweet and intriguing. It only made you want to learn more about Jonathan and his life.

Once Fieldy arrived - and got pelted with empty beer bottles due to being ridiculously late - he introduced himself to you before they got fully set up to play. You sat on a foldout chair in the driveway, your fourth beer in your hand as you watched them scramble to their respective spots. Before you knew it, you were deeply enveloped in music you had never heard before. You had no idea Jon was capable of projecting his voice and creating the sounds he was making. The emotion on his face and the way he moved and danced while singing sent waves of shivers down your body. Peeling your eyes away for even a second wasn’t an option. In fact, the whole band had your attention in a chokehold. It felt like a new world had opened up for you. Even when they would stop in the middle of a note and have a technical discussion, dick around or try to figure something out, it was beyond intriguing to listen to and watch. Every now and then before he’d start singing, Jon would nod at you to make sure you were doing okay. You were more than okay.

They played a total of 7 songs, each at least twice. It was mesmerizing. You caught yourself with a gaping mouth more than a couple of times. The boys wrapped things up and all shuffled over to you to ask your opinions. You could barely get your thoughts to come out as words in your half drunken, completely awestruck state, but did your best in showering them with compliments. You got a hug from Munky, Fieldy and Head and an honorary fist bump from David after they had invited you to come back to the next rehearsal. Jon said his goodbyes to his friends and you guys dipped with a pack of warm beer and a tightly packed joint that Fieldy sent the both of you off with. You hopped in the passenger seat of the car, and waved goodbye to the band; both of you a little bit intoxicated. The second Jon pulled out of the driveway, he turned to you with a hopeful smile.

“Now that it’s just us… what’d you think? Like honestly?”

“Dude, I think you’re fucking amazing. I think I’m your biggest fucking fan now.”

He snickered somewhat timidly. “Really? That means a lot coming from you.” Jon snuck a quick glance of admiration at you, fighting back a toothy grin. “Can I maybe get a kiss for doing so good?”

“You can get a million kisses!” You leaned over the center console in his car and left a series of quick kisses all over his cheek, causing him to giggle. He turned his head for a brief moment at a stop sign and your lips impacted each other sweetly. The two of you turning hot in the face, his cheeks bright red.

“We oughta crack into these beers and this mothafuckin’ joint when we get back to the apartment.” Jon excitedly mentioned. You felt eager, yet a little anxious to get high with him now that your feelings were out in the open. For the rest of the short lived car ride, you rested your hand on his thigh while you had lighthearted conversation. Every now and then giving a squeeze when he’d come up a bit too fast at a stop light, or make a harsh turn. It’s almost as if he started doing it intentionally at one point just to feel your grip tighten on him just a little bit.

Arriving at the apartment felt relieving after a long day of socializing with new people. The pressure you felt for the last few hours started to melt away a bit once you glanced around. Realizing you were home alone with the man you had deep feelings for and were getting progressively more comfortable around with every day. Jon pulled two lukewarm beers out of the pack and handed you one, fumbling with the joint in his pocket. He grabbed your free hand and started pulling you toward the balcony door; clearly very eager to get crossfaded together. The two of you sat down on the cruddy chairs, the sun beginning to set as orange light shone on your faces.

“Ready to get fucked up?” He toothily smiled, flicking the lighter you had left on the ground outside and taking the first deep inhale. You couldn’t help but smile, observing how attractive he looked blowing out the smoke. You shifted your seat closer to him so your knees were slotted in between each other. He raised the joint up to your lips and lit the end, prompting you to breathe in a hardy hit. You leaned your head back as you exhaled above you. Your head dropped down again and your eyes met with Jons’. He was staring at you with a soft gaze of adoration.

“Shit, you’re so fuckin’ handsome.” He took another hit of the joint. “It blows my mothafuckin’ mind.” He once again pressed the still lit joint to your lips, simultaneously taking a swig of his beer. A grin spread across your face as you remained locking eyes with him, taking a drawn out hit; a bit bigger then you anticipated, actually.

“Says you. You’re fucking beautiful.” You accidentally exhaled smoke into his face making him squint slightly, but not lessening his smile. He put his hand up to your cheek softly and caressed it with his thumb. His eyes darting between your pupils and your lips. The two of you already feeling yourselves getting gradually more intoxicated as the beer and weed intertwined in your systems. You couldn’t tell if your comment had gotten tears to well in his eyes or if they were already starting to glaze over.

“You think I’m beautiful?”

“Very beautiful. I’ve thought so since you first bumbled into my apartment.”

He couldn’t help but lean fully forward, closing in the last few inches between your faces. Smashing his lips into yours lovingly, he moved his other hand up to your cheek as he held your head gently. Your own hands found his knees as he barely gave you time to breathe before pulling away from your passionate kiss. There were definitely tears in his eyes.

“That means a lot to me, Y/N. You mean a lot to me.” Jons’ voice cracked out, your face still resting in his hands.

“You mean a lot to me too. You make me feel so normal.” You sighed, lightly dragging your fingers along his knee. “Jon… thank you for accepting me.”

“Accepting you? Man, I hit the fuckin’ jackpot!”

You both laughed as you lightly slapped his thigh, him leaning in to give you more kisses, occasionally nibbling on your bottom lip. The taste of smoke and your beers mixing in a comforting way, sending firecrackers and fast heartbeats through both of you. Before you knew it, you had finished almost the whole joint together. Talking about your feelings and attraction through the hits you were taking, giving each other soft kisses and light touches.

“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever actually liked a guy this much.” Jons’ eyes were totally bloodshot as he gazed into yours. “It feels so weird. Not like a bad weird, just a different weird… like, I wanna know every part of you.” He paused for a moment before moving his hand down from your upper thigh to your knee. “Not like that. Well, yeah, like that, but not just like that. Don’t get it twisted, I definitely want that… Just- Should I stop talking? I sound like a fuckin’ pervert now.”

He slapped himself in the forehead which prompted you to burst out laughing. He giggled in response, relieved that he hadn’t creeped you out, but obviously feeling mildly embarrassed. You reached a hand out to peel it away from his red face.

“You’re fine. I know what you mean…” you wrapped his fingers in yours, squeezing his hand lightly to reassure him.

“I don’t think I’ve liked a guy this much either. In fact, I don’t really think I’ve liked anyone this much. So it is kinda weird, but I dig the weirdness.” You leaned forward kissing him on the lips swiftly. “… and for the record, I wanna know every part of you, too. Both in the innocent, sweet, deep secrets sorta way and, like- well, the other way. How could I not?” You glanced down for a moment attempting to hide your expression from him. It wasn’t often at all that you talked about your feelings with people. You had probably spoke more about yourself and the inner workings of your mind with Jonathan in the last month then you had with anyone your whole life. It was a much needed change. He was sensitive and empathetic. Easy to talk to, whether the conversation was serious or stupid.

“That definitely makes me feel better.” He stuttered out; his voice cracking a little bit. Jon moved his hand back up to your thigh and squeezed softly, biting his lip. “I really really like you, Y/N.”

“I really really like you too, Jonathan.” You placed your hand on his and leaned in to kiss him. It very rapidly went from a sweet, soft kiss to getting rougher in nature. He was soon biting at your lips and pushing at your teeth with his tongue. His hand rubbing your thigh as he pushed his knee in closer to your crotch, your legs fitting together like puzzle pieces. He had his other hand running through your hair sweetly, lightly tugging a few strands each time you’d bite his lips back or let a soft noise out into his mouth. Your own hands were weaving through his dreads, curling them through your fingers and pulling his head toward your own. The two of you had completely lost track of time as you passionately made out and caressed each other for hours. Getting progressively more desperate for each other, but taking it slowly regardless. Pulling away for a much needed breath, you shifted your glance at the night sky; leaving Jonathan panting and resting his head against the nape of your neck.

“How long have we been out here?”

“I have no fuckin’ idea. Can we keep kissing again?” Jon bit at your neck in a needy manor and ran his fingers up your back, giving you goosebumps. Your hands still gingerly holding and petting his hair. “Please?”

Placing a kiss on top of his head, you sighed out; “I have work tomorrow, bubs. I gotta be up early.” Disappointment prevalent in your voice. Your high had began to come down quite a bit ago and your exhaustion and realization started to kick in once you noticed the darkness outside. Jon bit your neck with a bit more force, making you jump a little in your seat.

“Fuck work, when I’m famous you won’t need it no more.”

“I know. Until then though, we need to afford rent. Come on, you big baby.” You snickered and tried to stand up, to which he limply collapsed onto your lap, trapping your body down. You couldn’t stop from giggling wildly at his childish behavior. It was one of the stupid little things about Jon that you found so endearing. Somehow, you managed to stand up, finally getting him to lazily rise to his feet. You caught yourself looking up at him. It was easy to forget he was taller then you. Planting another quick kiss on your lips, you grabbed his hand and led him into your room, eager to lay down. Looking at the time on the clock felt of very little importance.

“I can sleep in here with you again?”

“Dur.”

Jon swiftly stripped to his boxers and collapsed onto the bed as you followed suit. The two of you excitedly covered yourselves with blankets and scooted in close to one another. Something you had learned very quickly, even before discussing your feelings with each other, was that Jons’ love language was physical touch. He always had to have his hands or fingers on you, his head resting on your shoulder, your legs on him, his arms around you, and so on. Now that your mutual feelings were out in the open, he had already gotten significantly more touchy. He pulled you close to him, enveloping you in the feeling of his body hair tickling your bare skin and the warm embrace of his arms around you. You decided in the moment it would be best to ignore his boner pressing against you, though it was making you feel distractingly hot. Jon’s fingers were playing with your happy trail, tickling you slightly.

“I like your hair…” he breathily whispered in your ear, giving you chills. “You’re such a pretty boy.”

“Thank you…” A wide, sleepy grin plastered across your face with his words. You wanted to flip around and kiss him so fucking bad, but were too comfortable. “I like your everything.”

“I like your everything.”

Despite your mutual frustration, it didn’t take long for the pair of you to fall asleep. Jon nodded off first, caressing your skin with his fingers until the sound of his soft snores hit your ears. Shortly thereafter, once again trapped in his clutches, you had no choice but to fall asleep in his arms as well.

The night was quiet and peaceful. The two of you had shifted around in your sleep a few times so you were no longer wrapped in Jons’ arms. It had been only a couple of short hours before the sound of a faint squeak had awoken you. You remained half asleep, facing the wall of your bedroom until your eyes shot open with a sound you weren't at all anticipating. You froze, eyes wide, trying to figure out the noises your ears were registering.

[lovelyrotter]

more fuckin...... dirkthoughts. trans thoughts

all dirks and dirk-adjacents in my mind and my aus are trans in some way. all of them. transmasc usually but again the flavour will vary

beta dirk is a binary trans man whos been on t for definitely more than a decade. pretty much as soon as he was able to he got on t. hes had top surgery and is pretty proud of his scars (insanely happy with the result in general really) but at the same time he doesnt like ppl seeing them cause they invite questions. he hasnt had any phallo or meta done but his bottom growth is like. insane. he prefers having the option to put on and take off any dick he pleases. also how many dudes can boast about having a rainbow dragon dick cmon. he passes real fuckin well and lets people assume hes cis (hes not Stealthtm he just doesnt like most people assuming which bits hes got cause hes an insanely private person and his body being looked at/messed with in ways he hasnt fully consented to, and/or is in control of, ties into his lil cal trauma). his strap is really nice black leather with brassy metal hardware. he leaves it flopped over the futon sometimes and dave assumes its just leather pride wear for like the longest time. whoops

alpha dirk has not gone on t. he has not had any surgery nor does he wear a binder. like his stance on sexuality labels, gender labels feel... not Outdated to him but moreso not as needed cause when he was growing up humanity was at a count of 2. he was closeted right up until his friends actually saw him through sburb and then in the medium. the only other person who knew about his thoughts + feelings about gender was roxy until that point (who was also going through his own background gender crisis. rox went through comp-cis for sure). but dirk very intentionally never mentioned anything gender related in regards to himself other than introducing himself as A Boy. jakes comment about if dirk were a girl hed date him gave him a huge wobble. he nearly considered comp-cis-ing himself bc it felt like Dating Jake was right there. but he didnt dirk is super used to and comfortable with not wearing a shirt cause again he spent the first 16yrs of his life absolutely physically alone, so he also doesnt really have a problem going topless in front of his friends. his body isnt gendered nor will it ever be gendered. hes a boy whos also not a boy but definitely not a girl. he is a secret worse third thing. jake got really silly the first time dirk just threw his top off in front of him though hahaha. if dirk ever did choose a label that best describes him itd probably be boyflux/enbyflux

if you asked hal whether he considers himself trans he would say "Technically, by someone else's definitions, possibly." but he mostly doesnt care to think about it. hes always been a guy. the act of porting himself from fiberoptics and binary to shades to a fully functional android chassis does count as a physical transition to him but not so much in the traditional organic-human way

[pwnyta]

Now that im done with my GI dailies...

ROUND 2 of the BNHA award show starts!

The award for QUICKEST YET BADDEST ENTRANCE AND EXIT goes to...

Star!

Damn she was a bad bitch....

------

Award for I DONT BELIEVE THAT MAN HAS EVER BEEN TO MEDICAL SCHOOL goes to....

ITS A TIE!!!

JEANIST AND WHATS-HIS-FACE!

Ok they can preform open heart surgery? Sure...

-----

Award for BIGGEST ASSPULL goes to...

ANOTHER TIE AND WELCOME BACK

BEST JEANIST & SERIOUSLY I CANT REMEMBER HIS NAME FOR THE LIFE OF ME

AND!!! ERI!!!

Damn this was dumb as hell....

----

Award for MOST DISAPPOINTING COME BACK goes to...

MIRIO!

...off-screen.... girl... Mirio I love you so much theres no way you should be this lame...

------

Award for SERIOUSLY WHY THE FUCK WAS THIS GUY ADDED? IT HAD LIKE NO SATISFYING PART IN THE STORY.... goes to....

KUROGIRI!

Kurogiri you were so intriguing before Hori made you a zombie of Aizawas friend he just randomly added...

-----

The award for MAKING ME THINK OF THE WEATHER EPISODE FROM UNHHHHH goes to....

...??? HER!!!!

HELLLOOOO WERE HAVING WEATHER~~~~

-----

Award for MOST WASTED STORY POTENTIAL IN MAYBE ALL OF MANGA HISTORY goes to....

Mutant bigotry!!!

Really Hori your bringing this up now? To try and make Spinners random character turn understandable? Weve had mutant characters the ENTIRE GOD DAMN TIME HORI!!! PRO HEROES! STUDENTS! RANDOM BG CHARACTERS! YOURE BRINGING THIS UP NOW!? TOKOYAMI ALMOST KILLED SOME OF HIS CLASSMATES!!!! YOU THINK BIGOTS WOULDNT HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT IT!? WHAT A TOOTHLESS TONE-DEAF RACISM ALLEGORY!! HOLY SHIT HORI IM SO PISSED ABOUT THIS YOU CANT EVEN IMAGINE.

------

Award for MOST DRAWN OUT NOT-DEAD REVEAL goes to...

BAKUGO

I mean obviously.... You know letting him actually have some smooth character development woulda been too hard for Hori...

----

Award for HOLY SHIT THE 'CEST SHIPPERS ARE GONNA LOVE THIS SHIT goes to....

ITS A TIE!!!! TWINSIES!!!

Endeavor/Dabi

AND!!!

THE SHIGARAKIS!

...Yall can get mad at me for this one... You know I aint wrong...

-----

Award for MOST UNHINGED YET SELFLESS ROMANTIC SACRIFICE goes to....

STAIN!!!!

Seriously Im in tears... how did this happen...

----

Award for THE MOST POINTLESS FACE HEAL FACE TURN IN HISTORY goes to....

....HER!

??? Seriously you got pissed about killing villains so you started killing heroes even a teenage boy? Thats so fucking stupid girl....fuckin WHAT?

-----

Award for I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS YOURE AN UNDERRATED TOP TIER G AND YOU DESERVE AN AWARD goes to...

MT LADY!!!

DAMN SHES FUCKING COOL! NEVER DISAPPOINTS IN A FIGHT!

-------

Award for SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! SHUT UP!!! THIS ISNT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!! I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE Y- goes to...

ENDEAVOR!!

SHUT YOUR BITCH ASS UP ENDEAVOR!!!

------

Award for THEY NEEDED TO TAKE YOU OUT EARLIER ON SO YOU COULDNT CLAP THE BADDIES CHEEKS AND ITS SO OBVIOUS WHY DID HORI MAKE YOU SO STRONG FOR NO REASON TOKOYAMI???? goes to....

TOKOYAMI!!!

HOLY SHIT TOKOYAMI!

--------

Award for I HATE THAT THEYRE MAKING ME DEFEND YOU... goes to...

HAWKS!!!

Hawks gave Twice plenty of chances to stop fucking killing people so he could be taken in alive! WHY DO I HAVE TO DEFEND THIS BLACKHOLE OF WASTED FUCKIN TIME HORI WTF....???

-----

Award for MOST WEIRDLY TOUCHING DEDICATION goes to...

All Mights CANT STOP TWINKLING attack!

The way I cried a little... my little tchotchke.... Him changing his attacks from states to his students was already so good but damn... :') Aoyama deserved this.

-----

Award for MOST TRAGICALLY SUBMISSIVE BABYGIRL goes to...

ALL MIGHT!!!

I mean we knew from the jump but.... DAMN Toshi.

------

Award for MOST HATED GOOD SHIP goes to...

KIRISHIDO!!!

Seriously FUCK those KRBK fans! Im so glad you got bested by the BKDKs you rancid fucks.... This ship was always superior!!!

------

Award for LOVING SHOTO THE MOST goes to....

Certainly not his fucking family....

IIDA!!!!

So this is love... mmm mmm mmm mmm~ So this is... love?

----

Award for SICKEST VILLAIN DESIGN goes to...

Kunieda(I guess?)

Seriously this guy is so fucking cool looking. Clears literally every single villain design. Its not even close.

------

The award for MOST HORNGRY goes too....

AFO

Seriously AFO... if you werent so obsessed with Toshi you probably woulda won its literally so fucking funny.... Elevated the nosebleed trope to literally spurting blood from the forehead veins from how aggressively horknee you are. LMAO. AND YET somehow this is not the weirdest boner you have for another man.

---

Award for THE MOST CONSISTENTLY GOOD CHARACTER IN BNHA goes to...

ALL MIGHT. Obviously.

IDK if Hori loves you or hates you by how he writes you Toshi but damn you wear this consistency so fuckin well not even Hori could fuck you up!

-----

Award for MOST REALISTICALLY AGED BY THE STRESS OF THIS BATTLE goes to...

Naomasa!!

.... LMAO... Damn. Stress so intense it made you turn into a distinctly designed character.. The magic of facial hair and eyebags...

---

The award for REALLY BITCH!? YOU HAVE A PERFECT COUNTER FOR STAINS QUIRK BUT NOT ONE TO AGE YOURSELF TO COUNTER YOUR DEAGING?! THATS FUCKIN CONVENIENT HORIKOSHI goes to...

AFO!!! For BLOODLET!

The only blemish on the otherwise sickest side battle in this whole arc TBH..

-----

Thats the end of part 2 of BNHA AWARDS!!! Some serious upsets this round! Damn!

[woodlove-2]

Kinky Questions - go!

1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer?

2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why:

3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed:

4: Something that never fails to make you horny:

5: Where is one place you would never have sex:

6: The most awkward moment during a sexual experience was when ______________

7: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny:

8: What is the best way to sexually bind someone: Handcuffs, Rope, or Other [if other please explain]:

9: What is the fastest way to make you horny:

10: Top or bottom?

11: We were about to ____________ but then ______________ [example: we were about to have sex but then his mom walked in]

12: Is one orgasm enough? Are multiple orgasms necessary?

13: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:

14: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you:

15: Two things you like [or dislike] about oral sex:

16: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:

17: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]

18: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:

19: Who was the sexiest teacher you ever had?

20: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:

21: How big is too big:

22: One sexual thing you would never do:

23: Biggest turn on:

24: Three spots that drive you insane:

25: Worst possible time to get horny:

26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans:

27: Worst sexual idea you ever had:

28: How much fapping is too much fapping:

29: Best sexual complement you ever got:

30: Bald, landing strip, Jumanji:

31: Is it good sex if you don’t nut:

32: Fill in the blank: “If they ____________, we are fuckin”

33: What your favorite part of your body:

34: Favorite foreplay activities:

35: Love (>,36: What do you wear to bed?

37: When was the first time you masturbated:

38: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?

39: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?

40: Have/would you ever have sex outside?

41: Have/would you ever had a threesome?

42: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?

43: Have/would you ever masturbate at work/school?

44: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane?

45: What is one song you’d like to have sex to?

46: What is something nonsexual that makes you horny?

47: Most attractive celebrity?

48: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?

49: If a child was born on the occasion of the last time you had sex, how old would that child be right now?

50: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online?

51: What is one thing that NEVER makes you horny?

52: Do you have stretch marks? (How do you feel about them? Has anyone ever had a problem with them?)

53: Do you like giving head? (why/why not)

54: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

55: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?

56: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?

57: Is there anything you do on Tumblr that you would not like your significant other to see?

58: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?)

59: Would you give your significant other unrestricted access to your Tumblr for a day?

60: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery?

61: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?

62: Do you watch porn?

63: How small is too small?

64: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?

65: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything?

66: Would you switch phones with your significant other for a day?

67: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?

68: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?

69: If you could give yourself head, would you?

70: Booty or Boobs?

71: If you had a penis, what would you name it?

72: Have you ever been on an official date?

73: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)

74: If you were a stripper, what would your name be?

75: Have you ever had sex in your parents bed? (Would you?)

76: How would you react if you found out your parents had sex in your bed?

77: What was your reaction the first time you saw a penis/vagina

78: If you had a penis/vagina for a day, what are five things you would do?

[raccoonfallsharder]

bro I just had the best idea for an oc for a rocket fanfic

a trans person

for me specifically I think it'd be cool to have a ftm trans person who's had top surgery because scars would be very important to both their stories (and also I'm transmasc; who doesn't like a little self-insert as a treat)

they'd be the perfect foil for him too! Rocket was fine as he was and changed against his will much to his deep displeasure, they were unhappy with themselves and remade themselves into who they wanted to be of their own volition

there's so much friend potential there! but I don't think I'd have it in me to do it justice in writing waaaaah T-T

1. i wrote a long response to this and it disappeared wtf

2. this is a fuckin lovely idea. i feel like rocket has no patience for terran concepts of a gender binary and that one of his most important values is bodily autonomy, so he’d be like, ready (well as ready as he ever is) to form a bond with this person. I feel like there’s so much they would deeply understand and identify with in each other and so much they could learn, too, with remarkable empathy and grace

3. i know some people headcanon nebs as transmasc and rocket as having helped them get topsurgery (I sometimes share this headcanon but my nebula headcanons are varied and sometimes contradictory). obviously this is different than what you’re suggesting but i feel like they could also go hand-in-hand. would love to see this dynamic with a terran though. there is, as you said, so much fuckin potential here

4. i. can appreciate not trusting that you would do this justice. writing is already so fuckin vulnerable?? and this has the potential to be a particularly risky arena, both in terms of a writer feeing “adequate” and in terms of expressing their own experience. but i also feel like you’ve got a beautiful fuckin idea here and it’s lovely and it’s yours, and for whatever it’s worth, I believe in you? sometimes sitting in those ideas and letting them unfold, cultivating them around you like a goddamn garden and letting them grow, is really fuckin good for the heart & soul & brain. i hope that you let yourself rest with this idea for a while. maybe write a couple drabbles or oneshots. you don’t have to share them. you can take as long as you want with them. you can eventually string them together or let them stay separate. you can continue unwrapping them like gifts to yourself (and maybe other people. eventually. if you want.)

(sidenote - honestly half of my shit starts out as exercises in catharsis. my whole folder of fanfic scraps is literally just titled “self indulgence” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

anyway you are lovely, this idea is lovely, and i’ve read a little bite of your writing and it’s also lovely. i would absolutely read anything you’ve written - and especially this.

[im-tempted]

The inarent barrier of entry for medical diagnosis as well as my own disillusionment with the medical field in general leads to me having very conflicting views on self diagnosis

All my cards on the table at the start of this I fuckin obviously I have some kind of diagnosis you don't get over six (there is no official number it's weird don't worry about it) surgeries on fuckin nothing I've got shit on my books and I am forever grateful that happened because otherwise I'd be super dead

BUT

That being said even without the calssism around access to medical care in the U S of A an offical diagnosis is ONE not always accurate and TWO sometimes actively harmful to have

Doctors are inherently flawed biased human beings working with less information than you have more boxes to put you in and a financial gain to keeping you in the medical system that is a system ripe for some kind of fuck up's to happen personally speaking I have had people try and diagnose me with things i don't have so I would stop talking about the actual problems I had that they didn't know what to do about

And adding on top of that the stigma around specific disabilities it's no wonder a lot of people do not want that kind of shit on their public record are employer ALLOWED to not employ you based on your medical history? Fuck no but can you stop them? Also not really

To the point of this

The idea that self diagnosis is in any way a """""""""""threat""""""""""" to a disabled community is laughable and actively harmful the biggest reason I've seen for this is ONE self diagnosis people making them look bad and TWO the stealing of resources

On the one hand I'm sorry if I'm the one who has to say this

Abled people of any kind will not respect you more for hating other disabled people that has never and will never worked

Stop

On the other hand

WHAT RESOURCES??? The ones people who DO have official diagnosis struggle to get

Ya I bet these (mostly) children and poor people are really taking all of the money away from you that they could have had if they weren't *checks notes* ...Acknowledging their own disabilities?

The stifling of any disabled peoples ability to self identify to attempt to claw some kind of health from the world is at best petty and at worst ACTIVELY hateful there is no tangable harm someone could ever do by attempting to figure out how best to articulate their own needs and the idea that it is a moral good to strip any minority of the words they need to gain access of any kind is abhorrent and never acceptable

[auto-correct]

Lemme tell you about TROLL HAL*

(*from here on out I’m just gonna refer to him as halwyr because that’s his name (it sounds like. halware. like malware. this pun was funnier the first time i said it i think))

anyways way back when i made a whole lore post about him & his backstory so i’m just gonna drop random thoughts about him here

he’s intersex that’s a thing that’s recently been added to his lore :) (there was a brief period when he was just a wee grub where he was female-presenting, but he also was a shut in for most of his early life so once he was older troll society just kinda went ‘a male fuchsiablood????? gasp!!!’ because no one really remembers him ever identifying as anything but male and also i like to think that at the very very minimum troll society by and large respects how trolls identify (sorry for going on another tirade but. there’s theoretically a troll out there giving everyone top surgery and i think that’s hilarious) )

back in the old days there was gonna be a whole thing with halwyr having to helm a ship to escape (that happened still. they went to earth where the condesce just so happens to be *cough cough* mind control fuckery involved with the helming *cough cough*) and being a little uhhhh. extra computery because of that. i was grasping at straws for how to make him resemble his canon self personality wise so he ended up being a psionic he has technopathy so that’s cool he doesn’t have to type with his longass claws what was i saying oh yeah anyways that was going to cause him and deirik (troll dirk) to have a more strained relationship and halwyr was going to be bitter about the whole ‘product of genetic experimentation’ thing and also the fact that he ended up being the one used as a living battery but uh. sorry not sorry that didn’t happen deirik and halwyr are moirails now & they care for each other canon is my sandbox and I’m using it to make glass fight me (i couldn’t think of any other reason why they’d have an even remotely brotherly relationship given that siblings aren’t a thing in troll society but i remembered that the mspa wiki page for moirallegiance said it was closest to the greek (roman?) concept of brotherly love so they’re moirails now tada)

*clears my throat* anyways at this point hal and dirk are merely inspiration for halwyr and deirik canon is out the window it hit the ground shattered into a million pieces the best of which i am now using to make a mosaic

halwyr is REALLY fuckin protective of his moirail and friends (except for jaeyke (troll jake) who is his kismesis plus That One Time Deirik Died (And Got Better) halwyr still totally blames jaeyke for that (and jaeyke blames halwyr. isn’t death and resurrection fun 😊 ) also it’s totally jaeyke’s fault don’t even get me started) uhh so basically he’s just protective of deirik roxxan and troll jane who’s name i can’t remember how to spell (jaehna???)

(deirik is jaeyke and halwyr‘s auspice he thinks they’re both idiots)

also he totally uses his status as heir for his peeps’ benefit also also he has brutally murdered a bunch of people for hurting deirik but i think i mentioned that in the lore post (the telekinetic bone-snatching) (at this point idk what i’ve said in the lore post that i might just be repeating)

also also also halwyr is exactly as mentally ill as i am which is to say quite except he doesn’t have social anxiety good for him (no, instead the social anxiety got projected onto ac but that’s a whole nother story)

so he’s very uh. *glances at the fact that i basically just confessed halwyr has the same mental illnesses that i do* let’s just say his mood instability doesn’t mix well with the capital-r Rage that accompanies the higher bloodcastes (hence the brutal murdering, which for legal reasons i must specify did not come directly from me)

unrelated but deirik is a goldblood but he’s offshade just barely enough to be noticeable without getting culled by the drones which is a big reason why halwyr is so protective of him alternia is lethal as fuck especially to the lower castes especially especially to those with even minor mutations

(in the unnamed fun side timeline deirik accidentally murders halwyr and somehow ends up surviving to adulthood and is forced to helm the condesce‘s ship both out of punishment for killing her heir (that she didn’t even like in the first place smh 🙄) and just because he’s ridiculously fuckin op psionics-wise but it’s ok! ghost halwyr ends up in the dream bubbles (there’s no game in this so it’s really just a Because I Said So situation again. if it makes you feel better maybe his lusus got him special afterlife privileges) and the two of them manage to connect over Trollian…. after like 4 sweeps of misery for the both of them💀)

(unrelated they’re both neurodivergent as fuck did i mention that yet)

yknow i get the feeling more people would care about this au if i focused exclusively on deirik instead and also if dave was also a troll but nope. you get halwyr and deirik being joint main characters of the au and distinctly-human alpha dave adopting some traumatized alien teenagers

(deirik belongs to @whydontwebegin btw that’s part of the reason i only ever post about halwyr i don’t think i could characterize deirik accurately)

anyways if anyone reads this far halwyr‘s pesterchum handle is thoroughTechnologist (i was in a hurry coming up with it at the time and it’s long since too late now so don’t @ me) so if you’re ever in the mood for rp I’m online sometimes (I’m afk a lot though so i might not respond)

i'm sleep deprived as fuck sorry if this makes zero sense or if i contradicted myself i wrote this in two sittings

[in-the-pocket]

"do you like dry burgers or wet burgers?"

Pippa was already feeling her palms sweat. It was probably withdrawals kicking her in the ass. She was still adjusting to this whole ' small town ' thing and not drinking her woes away was an important part of the adjusting. This man, Thistle as he'd said, had been patient enough to explain the intricacies of the simple town to her. Who knew small town life could be so city-like with the chatty Cathies?

Her tinnitus was acting up, a constant, dull ringing clouding her right ear; the ear closest to cymbals. ' Middle C' , she thought to herself. ' The fuckin' ringing is in fuckin' middle C. '

Oddly enough, Thistle's voice cut through the ringing just enough for her to process the grouping of words. 'Do, you, like,' okay, got it. 'Dry, burgers,' got it. 'Or, wet, burgers?' Ay, wait-

She shook her head and looked at him as if the words would clear up somehow. But judging by the somewhat playfully serious look on his face, she'd heard just fine. Small town folk were good at that, she'd noticed. Subtle facial expressions.

It was a bit of a rare sight to see her smile with teeth as of late. Her heart had the same ache as when she'd come home from her surgery, four screws holding her bones together. But there they were, her oddly white, darling teeth.

"Ay, boss-," she winced through her smile. "Sorry, Thistle. Names. Take that as a compliment at least. 'Boss' is good. Means you're straight." Her accent dragged out the strangest of sounds and her habit of defaulting to informal and oddly blunt nicknames remained. But she was trying, and that's what mattered. Right? Right.

[ Wrong. A wrong note is a wrong note no matter how hard you 'try'. From the top. ]

She blinked away the familiar, grating voice in her head. Thankfully, she was still smiling. All she had to do was focus on Thistle. His question. His absurd question. Focus. Focus. Don't drop the note.

Clearing her throat, she spoke again. "I have no goddam clue what a 'wet' burger is. We talkin' wet like juicy wet? Is 'dry' a patty cooked to shit?" She was starting to laugh at her own imagining different levels of cooked meat. Wet had pink tones and glimmered in the light. Dry looked gray and sad as hell.

"I like meat to have juice. Grease, the whole-nine. Street meat. You ever have street meat? Best meat around. No goddam clue where it comes from. I just know that stuff ain't 'dry'. Wet, yeah. I like wet."

She narrowed her little brown eyes and scrunched her nose in half-feigned disgust. "If you like dry, well done meat, you've got some screws missin'. Loony."

[fuckingdepressionblog]

Me @ my own body: OMG I HATE IT HERE 😭😭

[ragingbookdragon]

So Live A Lie, Just Tonight, And Burn Out Bright

Batsis x Hal Jordan One-Shot

Word Count: 3.8K Warnings: Explicit Language, Mature Themes

Author's Note: I decided to compile that one Batsis "story" into one doc, and I added the alternate ending for the one anon who asked! Enjoy! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

“Alright, easy sis, easy,” he worried, watching her carefully for signs of pain flickering across her face as he helped her off the bike.

She scowled, managing to drag her injured leg forward. “Quit nagging. I’m—ngh—fine.”

“You’re on emergency oxycodone and you’ve got a broken femur,” he retorted. “I’m nagging until you’re in surgery.”

“Ugh, stop reminding me.”

Someone hauled her off her feet with a quiet, “I’ve got you.”

She grunted in pain laying on the gurney. “Thanks, dad.”

“Miss Wayne, are you alright?”

Her eyes found Alfred’s. “I’m good. I just ne—motherfucker!” she yelped, glaring at her father who was squeezing her thigh. “Hey! That’s broken, jackass! Quit!”

Bruce grunted. “You need an ORIF now.”

A pinch in her arm made her twitch and she turned her attention to Alfred who was uncapping a needle. “Alfred, what’s that?”

He shook his head. “Nothing to worry about, Miss Wayne.” Smiling, he stuck the needle into the line. “You’ll feel better when you awaken.”

Her vision blurred rapidly, “Gonna take…a nap…now…” her head lolled, and Bruce met Alfred’s gaze.

“Call Damian. He’s got the steady hand we’ll need.”

***

“How’re you feeling?” Jason asked, setting a cup of juice on the bedside table.

She blinked slowly, staring at her fingers. “Why are my fingers like this?”

“Like what, Queenie?”

“Bendy,” she replied, flexing her fingers. “It’s fuckin’ weird.” She looked at him. “I feel weird.”

He snorted, nodding at Dick and the others who were walking in at the sound of her voice. “You’re on hydromorphone, sis.”

“Hydro—what-what?”

“Hydromorphone, sister,” Damian said. “It has increased your threshold for pain and reduced the perception of it.”

She stared at him like she hadn’t heard a word come out of his mouth. “I didn’t understand a single goddamn word that you just said.”

Snickers sounded around her, but her head was up in the clouds and she rested back against her pillow. Her family gathered around her, sitting up on the bed, and suddenly she cocked her head up, squinting at each of them.

“Sweetheart? What’s wrong?” Bruce inquired.

“Where’s Dick?”

“I’m right here, sis,” he answered, pressing a kiss to the back of her hand. “What’s up?”

“Why’d you break up with Kori?”

His eyes widened. “I—what?”

“Kori. Tall alien with the shooty-hands.”

“I know who she is. What about our breakup?”

“Are you kidding me? That woman is spectacular, and you broke up with her. She’s gorgeous, wicked intelligent, fantastic in bed and—”

“Wait, back up there,” he interrupted. “Good in bed? Did you sleep with, Kori?”

“Oh yeah, totally. I was her rebound after you.”

Dick blinked while the others cackled. “Have you…have you slept with any other exes?”

“Of yours? Or in general with the family’s exes?”

“Wait,” Jason said. “Have you slept with any of mine?”

“Did you date Artemis?”

He shrugged. “Sort of?”

“Then, yes.” She looked at Bruce. “I slept with Selina too, but to be completely honest we were both drunk and I don’t think either of us remember.”

“I uh—” he started, then quieted. “I didn’t know you were gay, sweetheart.”

She let out a ‘pfft’. “I’m not.”

“Oh, you’re bi, then?” Dick smiled and she shook her head.

“Nah, I like the wine but not the label.” She grinned. “I’m a lover of people.”

“How many superheroes have you slept with?” Tim questioned and she pursed her lips.

“Uh…I dunno…kinda lost count.”

For a moment no one said a word, then Jason asked, “You know how we call Dickhead the fuck-boy? Can we refer to you as that now? I think you’ve topped his count.”

Her eyes narrowed into a glare and she pointed at him, though she was seeing double, so it was entirely possible that she was pointing at the wall. “Keep that up and I’ll sleep with your best friend again.”

“You slept with Roy?!”

“I was talking about Kyle, but Roy works too.”

“OH MY GOD! IS THERE ANYONE YOU HAVEN’T SLEPT WITH?”

She thought for a moment, then offered, “Diana. But I asked her out last weekend so it’s up in the air until our date.”

***Part Two***

There was only one rule that everyone collectively followed in Wayne Manor and that was: no excessive noise until after twelve P.M. It was mostly influenced by Alfred who’d more than once pulled out the shotgun but surprisingly, mornings were usually calm and quiet. Keywords: “Were” and “Usually”. There were some special cases.

An ear-splitting scream shattered the silence of the breakfast room and in an instant, everyone was jumping from the table, sprinting towards the staircase to find out what was quite possibly murdering their eldest sister. As they neared the staircase, they came face to face with her as she stood behind the banister, her hands gripping the railing until her knuckles started whitening.

“Sis, what’s wrong?” Dick worried, already starting to come up the steps, Jason and Tim close behind.

“I’m late,” she whispered, and they leaned forward.

“What was that?” Bruce inquired, brows furrowing, and she looked at him.

“I’m late.” Her voice was firmer this time.

He blinked. “How long?”

“Two months.”

“Wait, what’s going on?” Jason questioned, shaking his head and she scowled.

“My period’s late, jackass.”

She wished she’d taken a photo of their faces, because nothing would ever amuse her as much as the way their jaws went slack, eyes widening in total shock. Running a hand down her face, she groaned, “Oh my God. I knew something was up. I completely forgot about it.”

“Sooooo…” Tim drawled out with a recovered grin. “Who’s the daddy?”

Her eyes narrowed and she shot him a glare. “Shut. Up.”

“C’mon sis, someone—some guy did it for you.” Jason quipped. “Who’s the lucky man?” he paused, seeming to remember something. “How many superheroes have you slept with in two months? That have dicks, of course.” She clenched her jaw and his eyes widened. “Oh no. Oh no…is it, Roy?”

“It’s not Roy!” she hissed.

“Kyle?” Dick offered and she shook her head.

“No. I’ve only slept with one guy in the past two months.”

“Who was it sister?” Damian quizzed, placing his hands on his hips. “I have yet to meet anyone acceptable for you to populate with.”

“Thanks Damian,” she griped, then groaned. “Oh God, I know who it is too. And I wish I didn’t.”

“Why’s that?”

Her eyes found Tim’s. “Because we were drunk as hell after a League mission.”

“Who is it?” Bruce grunted and she met his gaze.

“You’re not going to like it.”

Something passed between them, and his eyes narrowed. “Please don’t say that’s who you slept with.”

She nodded, pressing a hand to her face, hiding her embarrassment. “Mhm.”

“You slept with him?”

“Unfortunately.”

Jason looked between his sister and father. “Wait, I’m confused. What’s going on?” A snort sounded beside him, and he looked over, seeing Dick in tears. “Why are you crying? What’s so funny?”

Dick cackled. “SHE SLEPT WITH HAL JORDAN!”

Another round of slack jawed brothers appeared in her sight, and she hissed. “It was an accident!”

“YOU’RE HAVING A BABY WITH HAL JORDAN!” Dick gasped, starting to drop to his knees from laughing so hard. “OH MY GOD, YOU SLEPT WITH THE GUY DAD HATES THE MOST!”

“You slept with Hal Jordan?” Tim gagged. “Ew.”

“Sister, I am disgusted in your choice of partners for children.” Damian noted and she scowled.

“I hate all of you.” she looked at Bruce.

He sighed heavily, a defeated father…or maybe a defeated grandfather. “I’ll go call Hal…and order prenatal vitamins.”

She ran a hand down her face. “I’ll call Leslie and get in for an exam.”

“Holy shit,” Jason gasped. “We’re gonna be uncles!”

***Part Three***

He shifted the phone to rest between his ear and shoulder, hands busy pouring coffee into his cup. “Hello?”

What are you doing right now?

“Bruce? Is that you?”

Answer the question, Hal.

He rolled his eyes and frowned. “Well, it’s nine A.M., I’m making a cup of coffee. I know bats are nocturnal, so this might come as a surprise to someone like you, but rest assured it’s a normal habit for us normal folks.”

How fast can you get to Gotham City?

“Willingly?” Hal chuckled, setting down the coffee pot to grab the phone. “What’s going on?”

I need your…help…with something. And I need you in Gotham as fast as you can get here…please.

He almost dropped both the phone and coffee mug. “Did you just say you need my he—” the line went dead with a click, and he pulled the phone from his ear. “Asshole,” Hal scowled and shoved the phone in his pocket, before putting the mug down. His body flashed green as he suited up and he sighed. “Can’t believe I gotta go to the land of the living dead at nine A.M.”

***

He rubbed his temples as he disconnected the call, barely suppressing the sigh that wanted to escape him. “Are you mad at me?” he heard behind him, low, scared, and worried; he shook his head.

“No.”

She leaned against the desk, staring down at the side of his head. “Are you disappointed in me?”

Bruce sighed this time. “At your basic lack of common sense and sleeping with a team member despite the fact that I’ve told you time and again that inner-team-dalliances only end badly? Yes.” He turned his eyes to her. “But for being pregnant? Never.”

“Doesn’t seem like it, dad,” she muttered, crossing her arms over her chest; he watched them lower to hold her stomach.

“I think Hal Jordan’s an idiot,” he stated. “If it seems like I’m upset, it’s because he’s going to be my grandchild’s father and I’ll have to be nice to him now.” She huffed a laugh and he reached over, placing a hand on her arm. “It’s going to be okay, sweetheart. We’ll take care of this.”

“I know, it’s just…” she sighed. “I never expected this to happen.”

“No one ever does,” Bruce answered. “Have you contacted Leslie yet?”

She nodded. “Yeah. I’ll go see her around three.” Grunting, she muttered, “Figured if Hal got here in as soon as possible, we’d have enough time to sit and talk about this before we went.” She ran a hand over her face. “God, I can’t believe I Hal knocked me up.”

“Please don’t say that,” Bruce griped. “I don’t like that phrase.”

“But that’s what happened, dad. I got knocked up by Hal.”

“Why do you hate me?” he scowled, dropping his head into his hands. “How did this even happen?”

Sighing, she recounted, “After the mission in Brazil, Hal invited Barry back to Coast City for a drink and Barry invited me.” She shrugged. “I didn’t wanna be rude even if I am typically antisocial, so I accepted, and we got there and found a bar. After a couple hours, Barry had to get back to Central and we just decided to keep drinking.”

She grunted. “Hell, by seven thirty we were already gone so we got a ride back to his place and he offered to let me stay the night and one thing led to another and—”

Bruce raised his hand, effectively silencing her. “I can infer what happened after that.” He rubbed his temples. “Let’s just wait for Hal to get here, yeah?”

“Yeah,” she agreed, falling silent.

***

Alfred cleared his throat. “Master Jordan, is here, sir.” They both looked up from the Batcomputer at the test pilot.

“Thank you, Alfred,” Bruce said, and the butler nodded, ascending the steps.

Hal walked towards them. “So, what’s the deal? Why do you need me?”

Bruce looked at her and she sighed. “Actually, I’m the one who needed you to come here, Hal.”

His brown eyes darted to hers, a flash, a recognition of something and he nodded. “Aright. What’s up?”

“Dad…give us a moment?” he nodded and stood from the Batcomputer, walking to the medical section on the other side of the cave. She waved Hal over. “You might wanna sit down.”

He did, albeit suspiciously. “Why are you acting so…weird?”

“Hal,” she said, then looked at her hands. “I’m…ah crap.”

“What’s wrong?” he asked, brows furrowing.

She took a deep breath and admitted, “My period’s late and there’s a good chance I’m pregnant.”

For a moment, Hal didn’t say a word, then he burst into laughter. “Oh, that’s hilarious!” he held his stomach and wiped his eyes. “That’s a good one.”

“I’m not joking, Hal,” she spat. “In the last three months, you’re the only man I’ve had sex with. If I’m pregnant, you’re the father.”

He stopped laughing at that. “Are you being serious?”

“Dead.”

Hal ran a hand through his brown hair and let out a shocked breath. “Holy hell.” She watched him and he gaped at her. “W-what…what do we do?”

“I’ve got an appointment with Doctor Leslie at four. You’re welcome to come along if you’d like.”

He nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I will.” Swallowing thickly, he said, “Does he know?”

“Dad? Yeah. They all do.”

“They?” he repeated, eyes wide.

“My brothers.”

“You told them we slept together?”

She chuckled. “Apparently a year ago under heavy meds, I admitted I slept with Dad, Dick, and Jason’s exes.” She shrugged. “There’s not much I keep from them.”

Hal’s eyes shifted to Bruce’s back. “Can’t imagine the Big-Bat is happy about this.”

“Oh, he’s not. He thinks you’re an idiot, but judging by the look on your face, you already know that.”

He scoffed. “Your dad likes to think he’s smarter than everyone else.”

She cocked a brow. “He is.”

“And it seems like you’re following that strain well,” he shot back, and they glared at each other before cracking smiles.

“If this is real, we’re going to be some parents, huh?”

Hal could sense the fear in her voice, and he stood in front of her, placing his hands on her hips. “Hey,” he murmured. “No parents are perfect. And we’re sure as hell not.”

“If this is supposed to cheer me up, it’s not.”

“I’m not trying to cheer you up. I’m trying to reassure you,” he corrected, squeezing her hips lightly. “We’ll work through this, and we’ll do it together.”

She gazed at him then heaved a sigh and leaned her head on his shoulder. “Thanks Hal.”

“Don’t mention it,” he chuckled, then murmured, “But if we really are going to be parents, should we tie the knot?”

“Absolutely not.”

***

“Hal, for the love of God, will you sit down?” she griped. “You’re starting to make me anxious with all that pacing.”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair before shrugging off his bomber. “I can’t help it,” he retorted. “I hate waiting.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed.” She rolled her eyes. “Leslie’s working as fast as she can. Just sit down and be patient.”

Hal paced for another minute before collapsing into the seat beside her; she took his hand in hers and rubbed her thumb on the back of his hand. “What are you doing?” he asked, and she hummed.

“Comforting you.”

“Why?”

She looked at him. “Because you’re worried.”

“How are you not?”

“I am,” she commented, and he scowled.

“You don’t look it.”

“Well, that’s because I was trained to retain my emotions a as child,” she retorted. “It helps when I’m dealing with children who are scared.”

“I’m not a child,” Hal hissed, and she snorted.

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“You know what? I’m gonna—”

The door opened and their mouths snapped shut as Leslie walked in with a smile. “Good afternoon.”

“Hey Leslie,” she greeted, then glanced at the papers in her hand. “So? What’s the verdict?”

Leslie handed her the file and she looked it over. “Case of irregular period, dear.”

She blinked and said dumbly, “I’m not pregnant?”

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Our bodies act up sometimes, even when we’re grown. Irregularities can still happen even now.” Clearing her throat, Leslie added, “But your blood and urinalysis came back negative. You’re not pregnant.” She looked between Hal and her. “With the results, you’re free to leave.”

She stood to her feet, but when Hal didn’t, she tugged his hand. “Hal,” she whispered. “Come on.”

He staggered to his feet. “Yeah, I’m coming.” He disappeared out of the clinic room, and she sighed, then looked at Leslie.

“Thanks doc.”

“Of course.”

***

They were quiet on the park bench, watching the sun reflect off the water and listening to the birds singing in the sky. “So…I guess that’s a relief,” Hal stated, and she nodded.

“Yeah. I guess it is.” Laughing, she said, “I mean could you imagine if I were actually carrying your kid?” when he didn’t laugh, she looked over at him. “Hal?”

He blinked, shaking himself out of his thoughts. “Yeah, couldn’t imagine it.”

“Hal,” she plead. “Are you upset that I’m not?”

“What? No. No, I’m relieved you’re not pregnant, but…” he sighed and shrugged. “I dunno at the same time as scared as I was, I was happy, you know? Ready to step up and be there for you.”

She lowered her gaze to his hands and reached over, placing hers over his and he took it, squeezing. “Well, look at it this way. This was the universe telling you that you’re ready to be a father and this was the universe telling me that I’m not ready to be a mom or your baby’s mother.”

Hal gazed at her for a moment then chuckled. “Yeah, I guess it is.” He squeezed her hand again and climbed to his feet, flashing green as his suit appeared. “Now that everything’s sorted out, I should be getting back to Coast City.”

“Sounds good,” she agreed, standing to her feet.

“Can I drop you off anywhere?”

“Nah, I’m gonna walk around for a bit,” she said.

Hal took to the sky then looked down at her. “If you ever find yourself ready…call me?”

A shocked laugh bubbled in her chest, and she shook her head. “Not a chance in hell, Jordan.”

“Come on, don’t you think it would be fun to have the old Bat call me his son in law?”

Giggling, she waved him off. “Get out of here, Hal.”

Winking, he replied, “See you later, babe.”

She couldn’t help but chuckle and watch him leave, then she shook her head. “Ridiculous.” But a small smile was still on her lips as she headed down the street.

***Alternate Ending***

She gazed numbly out at the water, not sure if she should feel surprise or shock, but whatever emotion she was feeling had completely dumbfounded her. She was pregnant. Her hands had unconsciously pressed tight to her stomach, and she felt sick more than anything. Sick, scared, ashamed, every emotion that came with sleeping with a coworker—and every TV show and movie where the woman got pregnant from the affair.

How was she going to explain this to her family? To her friends? How was she going to face their scrutiny? Pregnant out of wedlock? With the biggest skirt-chasing, arrogant asshole in the galaxy? She’d take the brunt of their scathing opinions. He’d get off scot-free. He’d—

“(Y/N).” Someone’s hand rested on her shoulder, and she blinked, suddenly brought from her stupor and she looked over at him; his gaze was full of worry. “Are you okay?”

Instantly, she felt angry, and she jerked away from him, standing to her feet. “Am I okay!” she shouted. “You got me pregnant! Do you have any idea what this is going to do to us! To our reputations! To mine!”

Irritation etched across his face, and he stood to his feet, getting in her face. “It takes two to tango, (Y/N). We both did this—not just me.”

Her mouth opened to retort sharply, but damned if he didn’t have a point and she shut her mouth, tasting something bitter as she looked away. “I’m going home.”

She turned and his hand shot out, grabbing hold of her arm. “Wait, I don’t want you going alone.”

“Let go of me.” She hissed, trying to pull away, but he tightened his grip.

“No. It’s too dangerous for you to be out alone.”

(Y/N) scoffed. “I think you’re forgetting who you’re talking to Jordan. I’m—”

“The mother of my child.” Hal declared and she gaped at him. “I know what you and your family think of me. I know you think I’m an arrogant asshole and yeah, I’ll admit that I am.” He pulled her to him and wrapped his arm around her waist. “But if you think for a second, I’m going to let you wander around this bat-shit crazy city alone while pregnant, then you’re the one who’s being arrogant.”

He searched her gaze. “I’m many things, (Y/N). But I’m not going to abandon you or shy away from whatever this is.”

She swallowed thickly. “What do you mean ‘whatever this is’? Parents?”

“Us.” Hal said. “Maybe it’s just my big head, but I see the way you look at me. Yeah, I annoy the hell out of you, but you care for me.” He reached up, cupping her cheek. “And I care about you too. More than just what teammates should for one another.”

(Y/N) didn’t know what to say, because he did have a point. Hal was an annoying prick who at many times provoked her into physical confrontation, but on the other hand, there was nothing she loved more than fighting with him, because she knew he found it just as amusing.

Her gaze lowered and she felt tears well in her eyes. “I’m scared, Hal.”

“I know. I am too,” he murmured. “But we’re going to get through this.” He tipped her head up, catching her eyes once more. “We will get through this. Together.”

(Y/N)’s lips wobbled, and she tried for a lighthearted comment. “Isn’t fraternization against the rules?”

Hal grinned. “Only in the military.” He winked. “Last time I checked—we’re not in it.”

She laughed, leaning forward, and pressed her forehead to his. “How’s everyone going to react to this?”

He shrugged. “Probably with shock. I mean about me getting a girl pregnant? Not likely. Getting you pregnant? More likely.”

“Shut up.”

“I think we should consider getting married though.”

(Y/N) pulled away and stared at him. “Excuse me?”

Hal looked at her. “(Y/N), we should think about getting married. I mean, we’re gonna have a kid together. Might as well tie the knot while we’re at it.”

She merely blinked and spun, walking off. “Nope. Not happening. I’ll be your baby-mama, but I am not marrying you.”

“Hey! Wait up!”

[pitohuimaki]

in all honesty, i started this account as a silly little sideblog wayyy back in 2020, where i made one shitpost in january and then didn't use this blog again until april.

back then, this was a yujikiri-centred blog, and i would post literally anything that i thought people wanted to see from me. i was coming from another sao blog that had just over 10k followers (rest in scavenge toad meat spaghetti, never forgetti </3) and i thought that if i didn't get at least a thousand by the end of the year, i'd failed.

i had to take a break in march of 2021 after falling out with someone in my personal life that i'd met through the sao fandom. i felt sick even trying to make sao stuff, and this blog became sporadically-updated for the following year.

the first progressive movie came out in december of 2021, and i cosplayed asuna! my mother and i made the cosplay together, and i wore it to the movie! that's also the night i met one of my best friends, who helped me fall in love with sao and remember how fucking nice the good parts of the fandom can be.

by the time i came back in full swing in february 2022, you guys became SUCH an incredible force of love, appreciation and creative input. we had some incredible times that year, and it made coming back to sao feel so much lighter and less daunting. i started writing again, i started cosplaying again, i fell for sao again. thanks to you guys <3

in october of 2022, i got my elucidator tattoo! I've wanted to get it since i was 16, and then suddenly it was real and on my body, and i get to keep a piece of sao with me forever (and i will eventually be getting pitohui this year, too). what else happened in October 2022? well, taylor swift released midnights... oh! and i got surgery that very same day! i couldn't breathe for like 2 weeks, anything touching my chest made me gag, and post-op depression hit me like a tonne of bricks, but hoo boy did we get some high quality posts from it.

we had a good run in 2022 and again briefly in 2023 where i was probably one of the most popular sao blogs on here, from which joyous times we birthed spicy micheal (thanks to @sapphieissleepy <3) and then welcomed his lady friend and their spice rack. we were having so many discussions so often, it's to this day the most fun i've ever felt in this fandom (or any fandom) and i'm forever grateful for having the honour of it happening on my blog <3

in 2023, i started cosplaying... of... a different... variety... on a website... that's not youtube... and it's orange... and you guys have made me feel more fuckin grounded and normal through that than anything else lol. you guys keep me extremely grounded and grateful, and when you (lovingly and jokingly) poke fun at me, my awkwardness, or my weird horny Work Followers, it reminds me how lucky i am to have this space and my work space, because i get to experience the fandom in such different ways.

i changed my url last year! it was absolutely not under the best circumstances (still lowkey salty about the fact i even felt the need to lol) but it feels like a new era for the blog. this is the only url a lot of you have known me as! hi! hope you've enjoyed my small walk down memory lane for a second!

at some point in 2024, i made the decision that if someone is going to thirst over quinella (while ignoring her actions, or dismissing and diminishing what she had done to eugeo), then i was going to JOKINGLY AND SARCASTICALLY thirst over sugou. this ended predictably, and now in 2025, i have made a moodboard for our married life together and lana del rey was in my top artists in my spotify wrapped. oh dear.

there were also a lot of shitty things that happened (*cough cough* end of 2023 *cough cough*) that i don't want to mention here, but you guys have been so so extremely loving and wonderful, and you've made me genuinely thrilled to be alive. getting to talk to you guys is the highlight of my day sometimes.

in the five years since i made this blog, i've entirely changed as a person. i've gone from being a shy, reclusive loner who wrote fanfiction as a way to cope with stress isolation, and who never planned to make it to my 20s... to someone who loves waking up in the morning most days, who gets excited to go to the gym, who has made so many wonderful friends and connections through sao, who loves my job more than anything, and who has regular readers of my fanfics - something i could only dream of years ago.

and, for the people who followed me for ggo or sao abridged: welcome! this is a small taste of what happens here! i hope we'll get to make a whole lot more chaos together!

WE MADE IT

[ctorres74]

hhi. Cesar. hey this is. this's Mark uh. i was told to talk to you, i guess- im missing a whole... month, of my life. and, um.... wow. i think a lot of shit happened. like- uh, wow. i got a tattoo. it's... really fuckin' sick, honestly. and, um- oh! i got my top surgery! ...uh. yeah, i.. yeah.

im. im supposed to talk to you. i don't know what about, um... i hope you're okay. i love you, man, you're. you're the best friend ever

Mark

...

C-C'MON, CESAR... Y-YOU HAVE TO STAY IN THE CLOSET. YOU HAVE TO STAY QUIET. FOR HIS SAKE... YOU D-DON'T WANT HIM TO BE SCARED OF YOU......

ATLAS. I THINK THIS ONE'S FOR YOU.

[cryptidofthekeys]

The man, the myth, the legend himself... Dr. Greer

I said I’d post him on my mind, i am over my anxiety, i have beaten it, it can no longer control me and I am going to make it absolutely e v e r y b o d y ‘ s problem... I will say his description is p old but in all honestly this is mostly for just what he looks like

| Name: Greer

| He doesn’t really have nicknames but uh his title essentially: Dr. Greer

| Gender: Trans FTM (He/Him)

| Age: Probs in his 30s/mid 30s

| Height: 5’2”

| Species/Race: Human

| Occupation: Doctor

| Hair Color: Dark Brown (Spiked Quiff)

| Eye Color: Dull Blue

| Skin Color/Body Type: Extremely pale and chubby

| Appearance: His main outfit is the white lab coat for starters, he wears a light pastel purple turtleneck underneath (that turtleneck actually has a breast pocket with a heart pattern stitched onto it) and similar colored pants as well and even down to his sneakers are the same light pastel purple color, he also wears glasses bc he needs them to see of course- (not circle ones, normal rectangular ones) he sometimes wears gauges but mostly when he’s not working, he doesn’t have any pointed ears, fangs, claws, etc- but he has painted his nails to match his pastel aesthetic essentially!

|

He mostly only has scars in like the AUs n shit, his most PROMINENT scarring would be his top surgery scars likewise which no matter the AU or canon he’s gonna have those I guess he does have like, stretch marks n such. And of course he has a circle beard, it’d be weird for a sona of mine to NOT have one.

| Personality: He’s pretty soft tbh, a kind caring soul, as sweet as can be and loving as can be, the man just wants to live a peaceful life honestly, he became a doctor to help out the sick because helping people was always one of his specialities so he figured why not, he loves taking care of those in need and providing them with the comfort they may need, he’s very compassionate and EXTREMELY hard to piss off actually, like there isn’t a mean, cruel, or bad bone in this dude’s body… He just wants to help people and take care of them, he just wants peace man- there’s not a lot of backstory for him tbh-

|

well okay like ALL sonas relating to me- Greer didn’t have the best relationship with his parents, this man is not known for hatred but uh..

He do be kinda hating his old folks a l o t- they put him through so much fuckin bullshit but those are the ONLY two he’ll EVER say he hates tbh other than that  the mans just wanna live his life and spread peace, kindness, and love like what more do ya want? Lmao- but that’s about it-

|

I will say Greer do be kinda havin issues standing up for himself, he’s not good at at confrontation, with yelling or anger from others in the slightest but uh luckily he’s got a certain friend who won’t tolerate anyone else’s shit toward him and he doesn’t have to worry with confrontation himself. …mans still need to learn to stick up for himself too tho.