#good lord the autism is going crazy over that one

[lordoflightning]

quick start of year check-in!!! what piece of media are you currently obsessed with?

[ancientgreecehistorynerd]

so sorry that this took so long for me to get to! a lot happened in the past few days lol.

So i’m going to start with but daddy I love him. This is a Will song but more of Solangelo through his lens! the overall idea i think of is how will is like the perfect kind healer. most of camp who doesn’t exactly know him just views him as a kinda normal guy when he’s really a lot more complex then that. (and the fact that he’s a nerd lol) “Dutiful daughter, all my plans were laid. Tendrils tucked into a woven braid””There's a lot of people in town that I

Bestow upon my fakest smiles”I think that these lines show off the expectations that will faces at camp as the so called sunshiny doctor. Now onto the main idea of the song as people viewing different people as a stain that will dirty the people they’ve viewed as perfect. and i think that this is what would have happened with nico and will after they revealed they were together (i don’t accept the tsats confession scene and i belive they were secretly together for around a month until then) everyone still thought of nico as that weird dangerous hades kid (and just when they were friends in general.) some people depict it as nico arriving and staying and everyone just automatically loves him when it would take a few months for people to see how good of a person he is, especially with how quiet he is and how “odd” he is (this is because of his autism but that’s for another day.) I feel like some people may have tried to stop will from seeing nico, such as distracting him with tasks or other things because they disapproved of nico “they slammed the door on my whole world” for example. “screaming but daddy i love him!” is a funny example of things will would actually say when defending nico (as he should) people wouldn’t listen to him for a while. also the “i’m having his baby” line is while will can’t have kids (in my hcs he’s cis)(nico isn’t tho 😈) but the principle of it is others thinking a relationship is moving too fast. and with how hopelessly in love nico and will are they would probably think that they’re moving way too quickly when really they just love each other (they said i love you the minute they confessed okay…) “i know he’s crazy but he’s the one i want” will can accept that his boyfriend is a little gremlin sometimes and is proud of it‼️ and “he was chaos he was revelry” personally i don’t think nico is all that chaotic most of the time but i guess the whole secret relationship and how he’s just different from others could be portrayed through that. and how will had only really reacted with the “basic” campers at chb who had personalities sure but they weren’t as much of a mystery as nico was. “Soon enough the elders had convened Down at the city hall "Stay away from her" The saboteurs protested too much

Lord knows the words we never heard Just screeching tires and true love” people were telling them left and right to break up probably 😭 (not nico just will cause they’re scared of nico) but will didn’t listen to them like so many other people who know nico have. letting others opinions shape their opinion of him take percy for example hates his guts but then actually gets to know him and he’s very nice. “I'll tell you something right now I'd rather burn my whole life down Than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning” will being pissed over insulting his boyfriend is so real! also instead of listening and breaking up with nico he would rather throw his reputation away and how people think of him to be with nico. “I'll tell you something about my good name It's mine alone to disgrace I don't cater to all these vipers dressed in empath's clothing” people kinda treated will in that era of his life as he couldn’t make his own choices. like he was just being with nico to try and fix him or he was being forced or something lol. when he’s a very smart person who can make choices for himself. “Thinking it can change the beat Of my heart when he touches me And counteract the chemistry And undo the destiny” i just think this line for them is cute hehe “You ain't gotta pray for me” you know. gods. praying. yes. “Me and my wild boy

And all this wild joy If all you want is gray for me Then it's just white noise And it's just my choice” AGAIN WITH PEOPLE NOT REALIZING WILL IS A TEENAGER AND ABLE TO MAKE HIS OWN CHOICES AND HE IS NOT JUST THE CAMPS SUNSHINE ANYMORE AND HAS FREE WILL (haha) “I'm his lady, and oh my God you should see your faces.) very cute way to show how will shoved it in people’s faces when they realized that nico is such a polite and wonderful boyfriend. (especially when they see how nico courted will when they first got together lol) I think this is all i have at the moment so sorry it’s so unorganized i am not good at putting my thoughts into writing! but think of will the next time you listen! :)

[gayndepressed666]

Realm of the Elderlings characters as quotes from The Discord

quotes under the break as it is far too long.

((quotes by queer and autistic people))

wintrow:

"Oh kid, that'll get you struck down. Changing religions like sex partners."

ronica gaslight girlbossing and gatekeeping serilla out of bingtown:

"I'm high energy btw, but like if you gave someone with depression a coffee except I don't have depression or a coffee"

kennit:

"I feel like people should be able to kill their sons because God did it and nobody complained"

jek:

"You rocked her, you papered her and you scissored herrrr"

the pale woman:

"you better sleep with one eye open. I'll come in here and steal Ur bones... *slurp*"

kyle:

"the feels when you wanna shit on a child"

nighteyes learning about sex:

"And so thats why humans grew boobs :) "

tintaglia:

“It’s otay to eat babies 🥹”

wintrow:

"I just called you a god why are you upset??"

wintrow:

"Ohhh, you scared the Jesus outta me.... I guess I'm not Christian anymore 🤟 😔"

the fool:

"maybe I'd be one of those famous people like robin williams where I'd be really happy on the outside then kill myself"

fitz at the fool in the first trilogy:

"who would heckle me?? who would look at me and think, 'They need to be beat down *more*'"

fitz and the fool:

fitz: your going to kill me one day I know it.

the fool: it’s ok coz I will be there with you when it happens!😊

regal:

“Sometimes I wonder if I’m evil, but then I remember that I’m cute so it doesn’t matter.”

starling to fitz:

"if you got slapped across the face would you get hard?"

the general public about fitz after the mountain kingdom in book one:

"I know him. He's crazy. He has autism or epilepsy."

jinna:

"bruhhhh imma sympathy fuck you right now"

etta:

"I'm telling ya! I don't support fascism, but if you take a few of the bastards out into the street and shoot them publicly, the rest'll listen!"

tatts when thymara wouldnt fuck him:

"Yk Asexuals are actually sexist because they don't like sex"

fitz:

"I may sound like I'm being sarcastic, but I'm just being autistic"

paragon:

"You look away for one second and I steal your nipples"

althea about viv:

"this bitch did in fact make me gay. Titties out, ready for me to suckle."

the fool becoming lord golden:

"guys I hope to be a gay man :)"

amber to fitz in the last trilogy:

"Only gay people like boobs"

kennit:

"I'm not trying to hurt people I am trying to shoot them >:("

fitz:

"Do you think i have Artistic potential, or just autistic potential"

fitz off his face after downing blackberry brandy:

"On a sober not, idk why the table and my chair are wet because I peed in the toilet"

malta:

"I’m not innocent I just find men extremely revolting"

jek:

"I would get up to such mischief if I had a penis"

the fool about regal:

"I'm anti gun... but if I saw him 😡"

fitz at the fool and vice versa:

"I look at it and think who's gay and depressed? and then I remember it's you"

fitz at the fool in the first book of the last trilogy:

*whispers* "I very narrowly avoided shooting you in the back of the head"

fitz:

"Excuse me i just went into the astral realm for a sec"

fitz to the fool in golden fool:

"I don't know what he's mad about, but it's because he's gay"

fitz swapping bodies with verity:

"It must be scary being a guy friend of a lesbian couple. Never know when they're gonna ask you for your sperm"

the fool:

“I’m never going to lose my virginity because I don’t lose 😎”

etta:

"Why is ppl having blood on them so hot?"

ronica around malta:

"Guess what! I hate children"

the fool at fitz:

"*looking him dead in the eyes* it's fascinating watching dumb people"

nighteyes:

"She's in your bed, I'm in your boyfriend"

bee:

"I love the feeling of being evil, b-but in a good way"

jek thirsting over brashen:

"it's a shame I'm too sexy to be embarrassed"

fitz to molly after she fucks his dad:

"What a wife you are, ya skank"

verity on elfbark:

"See, I become all knowing when I get high"

bee:

"is it bad to put burning down a church on my bucket list? Idk I just think it'd be fun."

[autism-archey]

@hunter-sylvester tagged me in this, my very first tag game, so thanks hunter!! you are a pioneer of Metal Lords fan content, pls keep doing what you're doing!

3 Ships:

steddie, but listen, i don't Like season 4 of stranger things. i think the plot/writing was bad actually, but. i stuck around for steve, because damn they're good at writing characters and i loved his seasons 1-3 arc. steve & eddie have incredible chemistry that everyone else has already talked about but listen bro. what if they were t4t.

frerard, but listennn its for the DYNAMICS. i feel like frerard fics have like, mythologized this pairing into something distinct from those real people that are alive and exist. they've lifted the personas and adpoted them onto some really incredible works of fiction... there are archetypes and characteristics and relationship dynamics that i see over and over and over again, always distinctly non-normative and queer, and god dammit it gets me ever time.

i'm struggling to come up with a third... i think The Batman (2021) Selina and Bruce. actually yes this one definitely. god i fucking love those two. my heart like actually ached when she left at the end.

First Ship Ever:

This is going back a long time but I wanna say it was Stucky or Destiel that really had me first. which honestly i was right about that, those white guys have chemistry! i used to eat up post-winter soldier fics all the time and i always end up coming back to them. something about bucky on the run or holed up and scared as his memories struggle to come back, and then steve being the first person to be gentle with him. anyway

Last Song:

my god let me tell you. i listened to ethel cain for the first time today (Golden Age) and i immediately started like crying in the car and then i wrote more poetry than i have in maybe months? that was hours ago and i'm still neck deep in her discography =D

Last Movie:

Avatar: the way of water!!! Avatar is basically a new special interest for me and I'm learning sooo much about it. also this movie is Worth going to the fancy theater for.

Currently Reading:

Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins. i think this is the first time I'm rereading the hunger games, and I'm so glad i picked it up over christmastime bc 1) i got sucked into it and finished it in like a day and a half; and 2) what an incredible fictional depiction of revolution. like katniss' character arc, the emphasis on solidarity and community over and over and over again, every detail adds so much.

Vine Deloria Jr.'s The World We Used to Live In, which is packed with American Indian stories on spirituality and medicine men. i only just started it but i'm clinging onto his words like they're air. which, in the busted concrete version of the world now, they might as well be.

Currently Watching:

Dimension 20's Neverafter, which is premiering weekly rn (too slow! agonizing!!) and is just beginning, but already getting really fucking good. I keep my copy of Grimms' fairy tales in the bathroom now lol and the stories are crazy. The boy who could not fear had me at the edge of my toilet fr!!

Currently Consuming:

i mean where's the post that's like "autism costs families $60,000 a year" "all that weed im smoking"

Currently Craving:

my boyfriend come back :( when you're here you always put my head back on my shoulders the right way but it gets all messed up every time you leave

i dont think i have anyone to tag but mayve i'll edit & update with a tag later!

[anonymouslylovesyou]

Season 2 Episode 4 @whoblewboobear

Daphne bonding with her mom!!

Anthony always with the sulking

Edwinda don't phrase it like falling in love with Kate

The thing I'm dreading the most about the Kate/Anthony pairing is possibly hurting Edwinda she seems so serious about him

PENELOPE AND ELOISE ARE BACK

Crazy of Colin to visit Marina

Wait hold on the "Kate: I got stung

Anthony: Ah

Kate: I am well

Anthony, softer: Ah" is kinda getting me

These tv makers have got perking my emotions around down a to science the pacing is fantasic

Kate is kicking Anthony ass for being misogynistic again

The maid does not know how to ride a house I fear she is a danger to herself

What was Kate going to say...

Oh god Marina is a new victim to tell his travel stories to / joking I love him

Ah Colin and Phillip are getting along well

Ah shit Kate ran off to hunt on her own

The girls are fightinggg their so pissed to find the other one hot

ANTHONY YOU CANNOT HOLD HER LIKE THAT THERE NO CHAPERONE DID YOU NOT LEARN FROM YOUR SISTER OR LITERALLY THE OTHER DAY

I hate them so much fucking stop this you harlots

Man don't be mean about your husband's interest in botany

Marina is turning him down firmly but a little brutal AND NAMING PENELOPE

Also unrelated but I did have to pause the episode for a good while to project my autism onto Colin and cry about that for a tiny bit, therapy is expensive but recognition of self through other and Catharsis is freeee babyy

Edwinda is so happy and relieved to find out Kate and Anthony are getting along

Me about Edwinda:

Oo bonding over dad's perhaps??

NOT KATE HITTING HIM WITH "HOW DID HE DIE" Bro do not kiss in this library you're courting her sister

Love that Daphnes impression of Edwinda is "not bitchy enough for my bitch brother"

Daphne: Surely there's someone that's like you

Anthony, actively repressing his attraction to Kate:

It's extremely funny these motherfuckers are constantly drinking straight alcohol and are only ever tipsy when the plot demands it

Mhm what are you thinking Lady Danbury

Penelope my beloved she's so funny

Penelope's mom is scheming up some marriage entrapment

Edwinda said dance with my sister now, and she fully threw their lemonades away

God these dances look so good what are they called

BRUH DO NOT HESITATE ON CAN YOU MAKE MY SISTER HAPPY

Anthony is big mad that Kate will be leaving when Edwinda marries

Prudence you're so stupid <3

Wild tonal shift from the staged scandal to Anothy and Kate in the library

BRO DO NOT KISS IN THIS LIBRARY FOR THE LAST TIME

"yes I hate you" then why do you look like you wanna fuck him so bad?

HELLO ANTHONY STOP RIGHT NOW SLUT

Daphne knew she had to down alcohol for this convo

Anthony: and what kind of feelings are those?

Bitch you know

Anthony is about to act so stupid I know it

Ooo Lady Danbury "bro stop lying"

Oo Lord Featherington is confronting Penelope's mom AND TELLING HER HES BROKE

Colin and Penelope interaction!! Wuh woa he's condemning Lady Whistledown

Edwinda looked at Kate when she said Anthony's feelings may be elsewhere

PENELOPE SNUBBING PRUDENCE IN HER PAPER GOOD FOR HER YOUR SISTER WAS A BITCH ABOUT IT

NO KATE WAS ABOUT TO BE HONEST AND NOW ANTHONY IS PROPOSING

[astramthetaprime]

Plans and Progress

Okay, so I quit my job Friday at the end of my shift.  Without another job to go to.  Because it apparently gets easier to do once you’ve done it before.  /shrug

However!  I am not without plans, and progress is being made in other areas of life.  First, the plans.

I am taking this weekend to be a weekend.  Because weekend.  And I just quit my job.  So weekend.  

Starting Tomorrow, 1/23/2023 

I will sign up to be an Instacart in-store shopper. Grocery stores sometimes do hit one of my few sensory problems, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.  It’s like my targetting system goes crazy, I try to focus on everything at once.  Annoying, but not a desperate issue unless I’m very tired. 

I will also sign up to Rover to do dogwalking and petsitting.  Because I’m actually good with animals.  Animals are usually much more sensible and far less annoying than people.  

I am also considering signing up on Fiverr as I had an idea a while back to do small mailings.  If there’s one thing I still know it’s the postal service.  I actually came up with a pricing scheme for doing small-run (200 or less) mailings of 4 pages or less.  That’s generally how many pages you can stuff in a standard business envelope and send with a 1st Class stamp without going over the 1 ounce limit.  I can think of all kinds of uses for this, I could print, address, return address, stamp and send mailings easily.  It’s a skill I know.  Play to your strengths, work on your weaknesses, right?  

I will also re-do my resume as it’s a mess.  I’ll be putting in more applications to actual jobs but honestly if I can make enough in the gig economy it will lose importance.  I’d far rather work on my own at stuff I know and am good at than try to learn a new job at this point.  But I will re-do the resume.  

Outside of work-related, I continue to work on Pathfinder . 

Also there’s that bit of fanfic from the last post.  Because I got caught up over a good looking older guy with black hair.  Because I’m stupid for black hair.  

Good lord why did it have to be Tom Cruise?  The poster boy for L. Ron Hubbard’s ego trip?

My Buddhist intellectual heart just cracked a little.  Somewhere in my brain, a brain cell just sacrificed itself for the greater good of humanity.  I believe in data and robot spacecraft and verifiable, reproducible science as the basis for science-fiction.  As Asimov and Clarke intended!  

Okay, enough of the caterwauling, back to the post.  

Progress!  Has been Made!

This past week I was checking some prices of things on Amazon, y’know, as you do.  And I found a queen-size weighted blanket at half-price. Like, an insane price.  $23.  Not joking, it was $23 dollars.  So as it was a reasonable price and I’ve been curious I said what the heck and ordered one.  It came in this past Friday and for the past 2 nights I’ve been sleeping with it.  I’ll admit I was skeptical since I largely don’t have sensory issues except the aforementioned problems at grocery stores.  But I’m here to tell you, that thing works.  It’s like sleeping wrapped up in an octopus filled with lead shot, but I wake up in the morning and my back is not hurting, there are no hot flashes or nausea, and damn if I don’t sleep through the entire night!  I’ve had 8+ hours of solid sleep for the last 2 nights and I’m not being forced awake by my back hurting.  It’s freaking amazing.  So yeah, you guys weren’t kidding, I’d never have believed it if I wasn’t sleeping in it.  Yay Skillful Means!

I have been thinking on ways to get my original fiction out there in the world.  I am aware that part of the problem is exposure.  My first thought is audiobook versions.  I used to do a podcast many moons ago, it’s no longer online so please don’t look for it, but I narrated all my original fiction extant at that time.  And while of course I know my own work better than anybody, I am not a voice actor.  I have a thick Southern accent, an inescapable Tennessee Hillbilly accent, that simply does not lend itself to quality narration.  Also, possibly due to my autism I stutter and even to myself my speaking voice is just wrong.  I think it’s called “prosody”?  My voice is often monotone, the rhythm is often off, and thanks to the ravages of early menopause my voice dropped about 3/4ths of an octave several years ago.  So yeah, doing my own stories just would not be a sound business decision at this point.  But Audible does have this thing called ACX where authors can connect with voice actors to produce audiobooks of their work.  It’s something to think about, and certainly I’m well aware of the popularity of audiobooks.  I’ve listened to enough of them myself, that’s for sure.

The key point in all this -- I’m coming up with options rather than sinking into the abyss.  I am betting on myself, on my skills and abilities, rather than trying to shoehorn myself into the standard model of societal physics.  There are other ways to make a living where I can run my own life and not be forced into the boxes of what’s always been done.  I can make my own hours, find my own work that fits my abilities and limitations, and freaking be myself.  

Right, so.  I’m going to go watch my view count on AO3.  And try not to think about the Stupid Black Hair thing.  

[takerfoxx]

These past few months have been crazy busy and this new chapter was what I needed. It was SO CUTE. I loved it, greatest slow burn of the decade. The rest of the chapter was of course great. I specially loved Charlotte's subplot. Girl deserves some love and recognition, as well space to heal too. Mami with a Desert Eagle? YES. We're maybe getting some development on Anabelle Lee and I love it. Oktavia yeeting people left and right was a great mental image. Kyoko fighting a chicken was 10/10. I can't believe I'm sad over said chicken too. I hope everything works out for my favorite and best boy, Jerky.

I'm glad that Charlotte's bit came out as well as it did, as hers was by far the most difficult to figure out. At first I was going to have her get a job at the local librarian as that's her sort of thing, but then I realized that there was no way she wouldn't stay close to Mami. Then I was going to have both her and Mami join Kyoko in feeding the animals, but I sort of wanted them all to be doing different things, and I also really wanted Mami to be a blacksmith. Then I was going to have Charlotte be Coco's janitor/handywoman, and instead of her struggling with her insecurities she was going to get overloaded with Coco constantly giving her several tasks on top of each other, triggering her autism, but I just couldn't get it to work. Finally I settled on bookkeeper and her jealousy issues, but that also was really hard because I absolutely was NOT going to introduce a cheating subplot or have Charlotte seriously suspect Mami of cheating. Fortunately, she's super analytical and logic-minded already, so having her self-analyze exactly what her problem is and why she's that way works with her character.

I also was going to have her run into Alexandria, one of the ranch elders who was briefly introduced a few chapters back, instead of Kyoko and have them have a heart to heart, but I sort of wanted to stop throwing in so many OC's, and figured Kyoko would be a better choice. But since Kyoko ran into Charlotte on her way over to the jail, it only made sense that she would also make a detour to visit Oktavia as well, so that whole scene on the dock was written literally the day that the chapter got posted. Good Lord, it was something else.

And no, it wasn't an intentional callback. I just wanted to have a moment where they're totally relaxed and cuddling when they finally kissed, because it's cute.

[luna-helps-writing]

Could I please get an Lotr and The Hobbit Matchup?

☘️ 18yo Woman // Bisexual // Autistic and Disabled

☘️ I really love Mythology (Worldwide), Gardening, Home Remedies and Superstitions, Biology, Witchcraft and the Arts. I hope to begin crafting things like Jewelry, Weapons and Kilts, possibly even making a business out of them. I am also an avid writer and like to draw.

☘️ I’m interested in Witchcraft, such as working with Deities and Spirits, and performing magic that helps me and others. The first spell I ever performed was a healing spell for a sick friend, and not thirty minutes after I finished it, I got a text saying he felt a lot better, so I guess it must’ve worked!

☘️ Because of my Autism, I can be rather shy or quiet and quite blunt. I like explaining and teaching people things. I’m very polite but I have been known to go off when pushed enough. I’m also a bit of a trickster, unpredictable and wise in an unconventional way. I have the personality of “I never start shit, but I always finish it”. When you get to know me, I actually have a really good sense of humor and a spunky personality, but it can get buried under the nervousness a lot. I also have a strong sense of duty to others, I’m very protective over fellow misfits and am always kind and polite to those I deem worthy of it. I’m very conflict averse, but when I’m deeply upset enough, I go for the throat.

☘️ I am very short, with a fluffy mane of brown hair, blue eyes, crooked glasses, and pale skin with lots of scabs and moles all over it. I love to wear skirts, especially my red hand-me-down kilt, but that doesn’t limit my tomboy attitude at all

☘️ I have the bizarre ability to attract and befriend random animals. So far, I’ve befriended a stray cat named Diablo, a dog named Hans, a backyard snake, my pet rat Canoli, and a young horse named Fileo. People tell me that animals like me because I have “good vibes” and am very close with nature

☘️ I LOVE going outside and getting messy. Playing in the mud, getting soaked in the rain, I’m the type to go outside and come back home covered in dirt and twigs. It’s just really fun to me.

☘️ I have a habit of giggling to myself just by remembering something funny that happened, even if it was a couple years ago. I also laugh when I do something stupid, because I find my flaws and shortcomings funny for the most part. I love to laugh with people, but never at them. I never take myself too seriously, and I have a pet peeve for others who take themselves and silly things too seriously as well

☘️ My closest friends say I give off “Dwobbit” vibes. That’s a ½ Dwarf and ½ Hobbit btw. I’m around 4’ 10” tall, I don’t shave, I love crafting and art, I live in the Mountains, I’m tomboyish but I also love gardening and can be a bit of a homebody, I love going barefoot, etc.

☘️ I’m basically like a tiny, less-impressive Aragorn. I love travelling on foot, getting messy outside, I was kind of a Horse Girl as a kid ngl, I’ve always wanted to be a knight or king of some sort, chances are that I haven’t bathed in awhile, and I too would pine for a hot elf girl for literal years on end.

Sorry this description is so long, I hope you don’t mind! Thanks so much dear! 🤗🎉💕

Don’t worry about the long description! Thank you for your ask!

For the hobbit, I ship you with Fili!

• Personally, I believe that Fili would go absolutely crazy for witchcraft. His reaction at Tauriel when she healed Kili said enough for me.

• He would have no trouble helping you with your jewelry or weapons. It’s basically his expertise and he loves teaching you all about it!

• Your autism doesn’t bother him at all. He knows how to help, but he also knows exactly when to let you be. Comments that sometimes slip out seems normal to him, as he grew up with a brother who might’ve had the same issue....

• Often takes walks with you. You’ll go anywhere and everywhere. Sometimes, when he feels bold, he’ll launch at you, pushing you into the mud or into the water. Not that you mind. You drag him with you before he can take a step back!

• Your laugh might yet be one of his favorite things. There’ll be times when the two of you are sitting quietly and you suddenly let out a giggle. He cannot help but smile at you and join your laughter, even if he has no idea what’s so funny.

• And last, but very not least, he is an amazing caretaker. He will join you in fun activities, but he will know when and where to draw a line. He’ll remind you to take baths, and if you decline, he’ll probably propose to join you.

For Lord of the Rings, I ship you with Aragorn!

• This sweetheart barely knows any life outside the wilds. Traveling with you would be amazing for him! He’ll show you the prettiest places in Middle-Earth and introduce you to the greatest animals to walk around. (To which you interact with in a great way, much to his surprise.)

• He himself knows a thing or two about home remedies and biology, but your witchcraft takes him by surprise. Sure, he has seen it before, but now he personally knows someone who is great at it!

• It is absolutely no surprise that traveling with a ranger can get messy at times, but you don’t mind at all. Sometimes, he’ll just brood off into the distance and you’ll throw something at him like a pinecone or a piece of mud. He sees this as an immediate challenge and will not stop chasing you until you surrender.

• Aragorn loves how blunt you are. Sometimes, you can’t help it, but he won’t mind the comments at all. He appreciates them. There are multiple times where you’re very shy, but he’ll stand up for you, urging the person to talk to him and not to you.

• He teases you a lot about your laughing. There will be times where you suddenly laugh, and he’ll imitate you, which makes you laugh even harder.

• The two of you together are a great combo! He is there to help when you need it, while you do the exact same for him, because even our favorite ranger sometimes needs help, though he will not confess it.

My second choice was Éowyn, but Aragorn seemed a better fit to me.

• Often play fights with you. It’s great for your entertainment and great for her sparring experience.

• Seems like a sweetheart, but if anyone dares mock you, you can count on her to rain hellfire upon that person. You will definitely need to calm her down.

• Might he the most blown-away person by your witchcraft. She will buy you all sorts of gifts to help you. Sometimes she’ll bring something that you don’t really need, but you appreciate it nonetheless and proudly display it.

• LOVES HEARING ABOUT MYTHOLOGY. Before you go to bed, the nights are spend by you telling Éowyn stories. It could be about anything, but she is all ears. She even has a little notebook where she writes the things down you say. It’s truly adorable.

I hope it was to your liking! Have a great day and stay safe please❤️

[andhereisthetea]

Just finished Season 3

I have been watching She-Ra for the past seven days non-spot and I just finished season 3 and...

god

dammit

I am just....

UGH.

I want to talk about a lot of things after this, but I know I can’t just sandwich them in this post. I watched all three seasons in less time than I should have, I feel so damn conflicted right now about certain things, even if I spoiled myself about it before.

I spoiled myself about the whole Entrapta and Hordak arc, I watched gifsets and I saw your beautiful fan arts both in tumblr and twitter, but watching it, like... really watching it, it’s a whole different thing and now I feel both sad but also relieved I’m watching this after the show ended because 1) I am sad I didn’t experience things at the same time the fandom and most Entrapdak shippers did BUT 2) this would have made a mess of me, I get affected very easily with things like what I watched.

Ok, I have some things to say about the three seasons:

First... Entrapta.

There are some things I find refreshing and others that I don’t, I am not going to point it out in this post, also I can’t expect a lot from a family show.

The thing is... I feel they should have made up a backstory for Entrapta.

I understand the lore and the plot Crew-Ra focused into, but also I knew the Lore before the creation of this show, I feel there should have been a better way to explore more characters from Masters of the Universe.

Think about the complete mystery she is.

We knows most of the characters’ backstories, at least the most complex and important ones, we knows for example that Mermisa got her ruined kingdom from her father who was killed in the first battle against the Horde. We knows basically all the story of Bow’s family, we knows about Glimmer, about Scorpia, about Perfuma’s kingdom, about even Adora, Catra who was an orphaned, and also about Shadow Weaver.

But Entrapta? she is a complete damn mystery.

She is the Princess of Dryl, she designed the Crypto Castle, a literal labyrinth without sense, she is obsessed with First One’s tech since who knows how long, she isn’t an elemental princess but she can move her hair as if it were extra limbs and evn fight with it as a weapon, something that no other specie in the whole planet of Etheria can do, she has an intelligence even bigger than Tony Stark, nobody even talks about what happened to her parents, NOBODY, like they didn’t even existed and she popped up from nowhere and created her robotic parents herself. And even if her seeking for data and more and more progress and tech can be seen as a clear symptom her Autism (like autistic people focusing so much in something they can’t do anything else, I have that) or the fact she is looking for something else but not even her know what the hell is...

She knows or is implicit that she knows about the language of the First Ones, she understand their technology better than anyone else, also, her kingdom is the most advanced, they are considered to be in the industrial era compared to other kingdoms controlled by the elemental princesses. Where did all that technology knowledge, and also First One’s knowledge, came from? I don't think that in 20 years since she had reason and enough skill to be able to learn by herself Dryl has built all that; Dryl's kingdom had been working that way since before she was even born, so who told her? who taught her?

In addition to the fact that she has access to mining in her kingdom where she has been able to find who knows how much of the first one’s technology... right under her feet. The sole fact they put someone so important for the plot as a princess who has no runestone is just mysterious, she used the Black Garnet even better than Shadow Weaver, I can completely see her or someone before her doing the same with her own Runestone (which I picture as an Amethist btw).

I think they chose to put Entrapta’s possibilities of a backstory aside because, after seeing how the character became increasingly important and popular, they realized that once they had started to create her backstory and origins, they wouldn’t have been able to stop, and the central plot wasn’t about her at all, and is very likely that whatever idea of backstory they had about her would have been focused in the central plot. 

For example (and call me crazy, I don't care) if they had said that she was the granddaughter or daughter of Keldor AKA Skeletor, I would have totally believed it.

The thing with that is... even though they chose for her an Etheria region, which in the original Lore was unimportant, everything to do with Entrapta in She-Ra becomes important immediately, but ultimately it would have distracted them from the central plot with Adora as She-Ra, and Horde Prime, who is the main villain they choose for the show.

For now I just want to imagine what could have been if she had more protagonism and wasn’t only the geek princess, she has so much potential and I haven’t seen a character so refreshing like her in long time.

Okay, I want to talk about the seasons I just watched while the information is still fresh inside my head.

One of the main things that frustrated me about the final season is how Crew-Ra COMPLETELY NAILED IT in making me hate Catra. They didn’t make her sympathetic, she is toxic and most of the time she remembered me people who I had to avoid in my personal life, so the natural reaction to all her actions is to dislike her, that is exactly what Crew-Ra wanted for us to feel.

But in some point it got to the point that if you tell me the character was unpredictable, it lost it a bit in the final episodes, she started to become predictable in her actions because as an impulsive person constantly in denial over her emotions and projecting her problems over everyone else, it was obvious she was going to go through a destructive path wanting for everyone to die together with herself because it wouldn’t have seen less like a suicide.

And as a self-centered character with tunnel vision over her purpose and actions, she was going to completely underestimate Entrapta and wasn’t going to understand why Hordak found her interesting, she would attribute everything to power and fight for positions just like SW taught her, instead of something as pure as friendship, in fact she might have know it, but she didn’t want to admit it, because to know that someone as hateful and intimidating as Lord Hordak suddenly has someone who loves him beyond that is just too much for her, who doesn’t understand and is hurt by the fact that Adora doesn’t love her back, but doesn’t want to change one bit for fear to lost the life that ironically she hates so much without Adora in it.

So of course she was gonna electrocute Entrapta and send her to Beast Island, and her impulsive decision was made out of pure fear over what she did not only to Entrapta, but to Hordak himself and what he might do to her when he finds out what she did, and no matter how much she wants to hide behind a curtain of falsehood, is a matter of time he realizes Entrapta is nowhere in Etheria to be seen.

She is a character who does not measure her actions until the consequences are so horrible that she runs away, because reality is too painful for her to even accept what she has done, also she usually thinks that EVERYONE thinks just like her, every one of her speeches about fake friendship, power and winning is just about how she sees the world work from her perspective, she has zero notions over someone’s else vision of the world.

That's one of the biggest reasons why I liked Adora in the last episode of the third season; Catra made a decision, her desire to win basically led her to condemn Entrapta to death, almost destroy the planet and ultimately kill Angella or worse. I have seen posts about people saying that Catra hasn’t killed anyone directly, but I am sorry, she did this season, and she lied about it to everyone and to herself, but Adora knows better.

Now, Hordak

God how I start with this.

Hordak, opposite to the original Lore of Masters of the Universe, is right now basically an alien version of Lucifer from John Milton’s Paradise Lost but with God being fucking evil.

Just like Lucifer, he wants to replicate his creator’s creation on Etheria, choosing to rule in hell rather than heaven, but unlike Lucifer, he stills has a connection with his creator and just like Catra, wants to satify his wished to conquer Etheria all by himself.

But unlike Horde Prime, he is in fact a good leader, and a logical one. He appreciates when his soldiers thinks by themselves and achieves their goals, unlike Prime, and he in fact doesn’t accept empty adulation, if you are good at something, you have to prove it, not to him, but to yourself.

So I just love how with every season they are adding more complexity to his whole being, and now they have added the emotional factor with Entrapta’s friendship and ultimately “betrayal”, I want to watch how this at first glance stoic character loses the shit out of his stoicism, even if I already knows what is going to happen. The fact he already got affected by Catra’s lies over Entrapta betraying him proves how far he has gone since Entrapta came to his life, if he was just impressed by Entrapta or wanted to use her, that wouldn’t have affected him that much, he already feels something for her, but he struggles to know what it is, and even if he denies it due to what just happened, he is still feeling it.

Which makes the anticipation to the discovery of Catra’s lies so much more painful. 

Also, the fact he believed Catra, just like that, made me feel disappointed, but that is based on the complexity of the character and his self-loathing, he feels he doesn’t deserves friendship nor love; he is a defective clone after all, in his own mind he is imperfect and she is the complete opposite of that, so believing it is easy, but that doesn’t make it less painful, and that is what I am sure Hordak will realize ultimately.

I don’t know how long will took me to watch the season 4, but I know is worth the effort if I want to see Entrapta and Hordak together again, I love them, they are pure brain and incredible refreshing to watch, and the affection they feel for each other is obvious, one of the most bittersweet scenes for me was when Entrapta remembered Hordak due to the trio saying his name, her suddenly quiet behavior and calmed and painful smiled was so unlikely of her that one has to admit something more is going on, also her choice of language, “I had a lab partner”, not “I have”, gives a sense of sadness to the whole scene that broke my damn heart.

I will tag you guys @cruelfeline @ineffablelabpartners @etherian-affairs because I want to know your opinions about this, I never thought Entrapdak was gonna affect me that way, in fact I never expected to ship them at all, but here we are, dying for them and I just can’t escape.

[beautifultypewriter]

Hobbit & Lotr Ship please? I'm a Bisexual Girl who loves Biology, Folklore, Fantasy, the Supernatural, Anthropology, and also draws, writes, plays D&D, and obsessively studies things like Folklore, Irish Culture and Biological Oddities. I love cuddling and am very friendly, idealistic, polite and excitable. I'm very short and cute with lots of freckles/moles, fluffy brown hair and glasses. I have Asthma and Autism, am covered in scabs, and I love giving/making little gifts for loved ones. Thanks

I’m so excited to be doing this for you! I hope you like it!

The Hobbit

I ship you with... Kili!

Kili is so in love with you. He thinks you’re the cutest person alive and he never forgets to say it. He definitely kisses all over your freckles in an attempt to make you laugh if he ever notices that you’re feeling down. Kili also thinks you’re the smartest person he’s ever met and he has no shortage of questions for you about biology and anthropology. He’ll sit with while you study and though he tries not to interrupt, sometimes he can’t help himself and he has to ask about what you’re reading. He looks over your shoulder while you draw because he’s curious about what you’re working on, but he only does it once because he doesn’t want to distract you. He’s always asking you to draw him, saying he’d be a fantastic model. Kili treasures every single gift you give him. He even has a special box where he keeps them all, so that they never get lost. He always returns the favor and gives you special gifts. Sometimes it’s something he crafted for you and other times it’s little things that he saw that reminded him of you. Definitely low key panics if you have an asthma attack, but he stays right by your side the whole time. When you’ve recovered, he’s running his hands up and down your arms, staring at you and making sure that you’re okay. Kili knows that you love folklore and fantasy, so he tells you every awesome story he can think of. You love to cuddle? Well get ready for the cuddle monster that is Kili. This boy is down for cuddles any time and any where. He loves to hold you in his arms, he wouldn’t trade it for anything in all the world.

Lord of the Rings

I ship you with... Merry!

Merry loves to take you to The Green Dragon whenever he has the chance. Both because he loves how friendly you are with everyone you meet and because he knows that there are a lot of people with good folk tales to be told. He knows you love folklore and he wants to give you the chance to hear as many stories as you can. He’s always asking you about the biological oddities that you study because he’s very curious about all that you know about the subject. Merry is very mindful of your asthma. He’s always making sure that you aren’t pushing yourself too hard, so that you won’t have an attack. He loves when you cuddle up to him and he never hesitates to wrap his arms around you in these situations. He also takes cuddling sessions as an opportunity to kiss your forehead. He loves every gift you give him. If you ever draw something for him, he very proudly displays it in his home and whenever someone asks about it, he states that his talented lady drew it for him. Because you are his lady and he loves to go around saying it. Merry loves to see you get excited about things because then he gets excited too and it’s just the two of you going crazy over something. Merry brings you a flower every single day - he says it’s because he wants you to have something beautiful, just like he has you.

[jamiebluewind]

Character Descriptions for Fantasy High 2.9!

***

As always, let me know if I need to edit or add anything and tag/ask/PM me about art and stories so I can check them out!

Warning: trauma, abuse, mental abuse, neglect, starvation, manipulation, memory loss mention, dark themes, isolation, imprisonment, fantasy racism, vomit mention (please let me know if I missed any)

All pronounciations typed out have a rolled R.

***

Facts

The party is currently at 44,100 exp. each. Next level is at 48,000 (which will probably take 3 more big battles, 2 if Brennan is super generous with RP awards).

Abernant family had all their land and wealth reclaimed by The Court of Stars for their treachery and failure to prevent a war with Solace. Elianwyn committed treason and betrayal as well.

To save Adaine, the group decided to break up into 3 teams: Pylon 1 (Ragh, Tracker, Cathilda, and Sandra Lynn), Pylon 2 (Gorgug, Fabian, and Riz), and Recovery (Ayda, Fig, and Kristen). Team 1 and 2 would simultaneously take out the pylons. Then, the recovery team would go in (invisible and/or disguised) and gets Adaine and Aelwyn. They would all meet back at Van where they would most likely use Ayda's teleport to leave Fallinel (or regroup to plan their next move).

***

New Characters

Tell-ah-mine Low-men-el-da

Fabian's grandpapa

Tall elf with regal green robes, a silver circlet, long platinum white blond hair with a widows peak, and shimmering blue eyes

Crinkle in the corners of his eyes shows his age in sort of an Elrond way. He look of a dude in his late 40s/early 50s who took excellent care of his body and kept it tight

Moves with supernatural grace

Can turn into silver sand and float away

Has no concept of what time means

Obsessed with the fact that his grandson will die before him (Your human blood has brought mortality to this family. You will one day die.)

Offers to send word to an elf who is a fabled eye smith who lives on the high mountains at the heart of Fallinel that can craft a working eye (from songs, whispers, beams of moonlight, jeweled edges of the blue of the sea, and shimmering poems pulled from the ether itself) for Fabian, but has no clue how long it will take (a moment, a year, or a hundred years).

Can't pronounce words in common very well, especially words he's never heard before (which delights Fabian and pisses off Gorgug)

Calls Fabian Aramais Seacaster fa-bee-ahn ah-rye-ah-my-ess Seacaster (which might actually be the proper pronouncations of his name in that region as "Seacaster" was said correctly and that's how all the other elves say his name as well) and calls Hallariel ha-lair-ee-el

Weeps without moving his face, but also sometimes makes a soft eeehhhh sound when he cries (at one point he cried over a drop of water)

Gifted stewardship of Khy-low Meh-new-rah 3000 years ago after he crafted The Sword of the North Star (he was the smith of fung-dran-ghoor) for the ancient king of Fallinel Th-wrist-win Eversong.

"Without the Elven Oracle, we are lost."

Saw the Abernants as power hungry and cruel and can't understand why they would leave Fallinel. He found Anguin in particular to be a crass and small man with no nobility, only a thirst for power.

Thinks Riz has a harsh energy, is "a little dick", and calls him "a strange green mouse thing"

Got physically ill when a gun was explained to him, calling it gross and some dwarven kind of thing before vomiting which he turns into a flock of white crows

Vhan-lair-ee-el

Fabian's aunt

Tried to heal Fabian's pneumonia with elvan singing

Said "I have failed" when her singing doesn't work before she fades into starlight and vanishes

Hal-door-in and [unnamed youth]

Elven teens in white linen shorts arguing because [unnamed] believes Hal-door-in took his lute.

Calmed by a distant song which stopped their fight.

Faf-threth-riel

Lithe elven youth (around 17 or 18 years old) with a blond mop of hair covering one eye

Bakes elven whey bread

Lived a sheltered life

Ragh was the first half-orc he met

Mostly into Ragh due to Ragh being half orc, excessively talking about his green skin (like the boughs of a tree leafy, my leafy man), being big and beefy (your legs are like the mighty trunks of trees), was really into rage (like when Ragh punched a seat cushion) to the point of it making Ragh uncomfortable

Sang in bed

Treth-thren-ren

Elven youth who does morning dance yoga

Tried to get Fabian to eat a grape

Oak Warriors

Elemental plant based automaton soldiers made of pure magic

Look like 8 foot tall green men with leaves coming from their faces

***

Changes to Established Characters

Aelwyn

Matted long blond hair

Dry skin, chapped colorless lips, and thick bags under her eyes

Severely dehydrated and trance deprived (probably hasn't been allowed to trance for nearly a year)

5 points of exhaustion. Only magic is keeping her from going to the 6th level and dying.

Her "room" is a large large beautiful elven chamber with silver and marble. Ambiant light glows from the white stone.

Trapped inside a 15 foot diameter orb that's constantly turning so she can't trance

Crawling on hands and knees while trapped, shaking with the effort

Doesn't give Adaine up to Kear

Can still remember how to cast the message cantrip

Feels strange and addled (unable to think clearly; confused), can't remember what's real or imagined anymore, doesn't clearly remember what happened in her past (including what she did to get imprisoned), and forgets what she and Adaine have already talked about (causing a lot of reputation).

Thinks her parents "tried their best they could" and that "they expected quite a lot of us, but isn't that what- doesn't that... didn't that make us great?" (possibly due to something her father said or did since her imprisonment as it echoes a few things he's said)

Gilear

Looks scruffy (from not shaving), dirty, and has pit stains

Somehow didn't mess up being diplomatic with Fabian's grandpapa

Unbuttons the top button on his shirt when he "lets loose"

To Fig about Sandra Lynn and Garthy: Are you aware of such... hanky panky?

Learning of Sandra Lynn's infidelity with Garthy "Honestly? Perhaps this is... fucked up. It makes me feel... like there wasn't something uniquely wrong with me. Maybe a tiny little w for Gilear."

Spent the night walking through the forest with Hallariel's father, reciting poetry (badly)

To Fabian after Hallariel's father threw up "You're low and he's low. It's Gilear's day baby! It's Gilear's day."

Tried to ask Hallariel's father for her hand, but even though Fig gave him bardic inspiration and Riz helped by covering Fabian's mouth, he failed... so much. ("Lord Tell-ah-mine of Khy-low Meh-new-rah I like you am-" *makes himself throw up* "We get it. We both get it. We... We're the throw up boys." *passes out*)

Ayda

Hid in the van the entire visit

Might have rejection sensitive dysphoria (which is common in those with autism or ADHD)

Did a sending spell to Zelda for Gorgug for 150 gold (after reminding him that she very much does not like anyone in her debt or visa versa)

Offered to exact vengeance on Zelda for Gorgug

Is powerful enough to know teleport and learn plane shift (so level 13 or higher)

Stated that Adaine is her best friend and decides that since Fig is also Adaine's best friend, by the transitive property she is best friends with Fig as well (and Fig agreed). Learning this, she says "Fantastic. I grow richer by the day. I'm emotional." before starting to cry fire "I'm emotional. I'm gonna fly away." She then flew away, returning after she had calmed down.

Ragh

Ate grapes and started burping musical notes after he left Khy-low Meh-new-rah.

Lost his virginity to Faf-threth-riel who then got creepy and kinda racist, making Ragh very uncomfortable (and want to get out of there asap)

Fabian

Lost both points of exhaustion thanks to the 8000 thread count elven sheets (did they get to keep the sheets or at least one sheet for help with exhaustion?)

Felt really good when he tried out dance yoga, even wondering if he should be some kind of yoga dancer instead of a fighter (how about a whirling dervish dancer like Cathilda?)

The grapes he put in his pocket (after refusing to eat them) turned into song

Indifferent towards saving Aelwyn and doesn't want to be on the retrieval team

When he started feeling anxious about the Aelwyn stuff, Riz told him to lose himself in dancing again to feel free (Riz: You are the only one that I wanna see dancing right now.) It made him feel much better.

***

Other Characters

Adaine

Taken by Court of Stars

Her jacket and spellbook were taken

Trapped in an orb which is soft and doesn't hurt her, but the constant movement of its slow turning doesn't allow her to be still or trance

The walls of her room glow with runes and there are many perminant magical effects, making her captors capable of some crazy things (like prepared directional counter spells), but the setup wouldn't counter cantrips

Escaped the orb with dispel magic (dc 15) which makes a couple counter spells go off and an alarm sound

Hid in Aelwyn's room. The sister's spoke before she was recaptured and placed back in her orb. Adaine told Aelwyn that she was going to get her out

Discovered that her room was close enough to Aelwyn to talk to her via the message cantrip

Repeatedly cast Ray of Frost to turn her orb into a slip and slide to stay entertained

Instead of speaking to her father in elvish, she responded in common. Also cast Tasha's Hideous Laughter on him.

Anguin and Kear said she would be executed for treason for staying in Solace and refusing to cooperate. She demanded a lawyer and then the Ambassador to Solace, citing her age and being a student at Augefort Adventuring Academy which summoned a recorded hologram of Arthur Augefort.

Arthur Augefort

Has a recorded hologram that is activated when a student claims the need of his diplomatic help in foreign affairs.

It threatens the listeners with graphic and terrifying violence and doom, giving them the options of either rectify the actions that summoned him (Yes) or refuse and welcome the aforementioned punishment for their actions (No).

Gorgug

Fabian's grandfather called him Jhor-judge

Finally got a message to Zelda via Ayda using her sending spell (Zelda. Safe in Fallinel. Gonna finish cell tower soon. Sorry about everything, but hope your break is going well in spite of this. Miss you.) and got a reply the next morning a little while after waking up (Sorry. Was at a party. You don't have to build a cell tower. That's crazy. It's all whatever Gorgug. I don't blame you.)

Didn't sleep well, but still got the benefit of a full night's sleep due to elven sheets.

Kristen

Got in a fight with Tracker and then got 3 nat 1s on persuasion checks when she tried to make up with her.

Slept in Adaine's room

Doesn't know how to make a cell tower

Took one of the 40 to 50 foot long diaphanous silk scarves with her

Gave (inspiring?) speech ending with "Friendship is thinker than water and we need water to live." which gave everyone 11 temp hit points

Accidentally called Pok a "smiling elf" and then blew it off as being due to her being human

Can now see Shadow Cat in the picture (along with Tracker, Sandra Lynn, Garthy, Riz, and Sklonda and possibly the dead cambian, Pok, Jace, and Adaine's mom) and reacted by saying "Was I spooning the cat all night in the milk!?"

Sandra Lynn

Dropped out senior year and got her diploma after the fact to join an adventuring party

Joined as a replacement member for an existing adventuring party that was already active in the world and included an older much more powerful married couple.

Fresh out of high school, fell in love with one person from the couple (nonbinary or gender intentionally hidden) who "did not treat her very kindly"

When it all came out, she was ejected from the adventuring party, her romantic partner took great pains to smear her name (so no one would accept her), no other party would take her as a replacement, and she was forced to become a Celesian Ranger

Gilear knows who the couple were, but doesn't want to tell Fig (could she know the people involved?)

Key-heir/Khear

Child-like elven maiden with long brown braided hair, a white gown, and a large staff.

When confronted by Arthur Augefort's hologram, she chose to not heed his warnings.

***

More from 2.9!

***

Previous

[whatsthenameofthisgame]

Intergalactic Interrogations (II)

"Where am I?"

[What do you mean?]

"Instead of just sitting there moving blood all day, and failing roughly might I add,- Are you recording this conversation? That's disrespectful, I'll have you know we started learning binary and ridiculous little facts about your friend. I don't know who raised you wrong,"

[Hey.}

"I'd- {emmited} have you forget. Speak English numb for brawl! *maybe there is a slap here*"

["Go to the top 10 close or near you everywhere you go that you consider the smartest people in the world & become their best friends foreverest...," I drawl out every one of my answers like a disgusting fountain, yet they aren't happy with any of them. To think it all could have started with a scared girl asking me what I know and warp through timespace paranoia, or that quantum mechanics has caused this all to be real.]

"Here's (apparently) what living sages do they write all of the time. And they secretly don't give a fuck what anyone thinks about them."

[I'm listening to someone write the show for me, I don't always connect parts of my brain with other parts so well, but when I don't its's because I'm completely mental that I can make things out as other sounds.]

"He inserted apparently over us. What a dick head."

[I was writing before this as well. Get ready for another roundabout of Intergalactic Interrogations]

["How would you describe this, Fake Judas(2) what kind of situation do we have here? Remember, I'm made to forget and then reremember again."]

"It's very logical. It's simple. You have to have a Marine Corp mindset in infilitrating the cause."

[I am both afraid and completely unafraid of what I am doing. To be afraid of this silly game would be ridiculous and stupid. On the other hand he's been learning from me as I learn from him-]

"He's been completely thinking ridiculous things over what we're saying. He's a whoremonger." ""IT IT,"" maybe demons scream, but I am untethered from the boulder like a chain beneath the ocean, the weight simply presses into the sand. The fishes swim around as I wander in my drowning to the top where the ship is safe in the sunlight.

[On the other hand- quantum questions pose like prose, possessing possibly -  I ignore FakeJudas(2). It is hard to keep up with everything. I need a writer still. I turn to Affiliate. Please have Alliteration do her thing without guiding us into rap for hours on end again, thank you very much. Affiliate looks confused and furious, for I often thought he was on the wrong end of the job spectrum ever since our staycation in the fire bird land of no sounds, place of the falsified Gods, faces in the spaces, The Devil's home of Peter's ignorances ... Anyway where was I? It is really hard to keep up with everybody and everything. There is a whole plot line, that I feel truly matters, and we are all missing it for the amount of activity going on in all of your heads while I've got mine. Is it mine? To start. Or are all of these conversations I'm tapping into the way of the real brain. Every particle of water an ocean? Every idea a world of thought? I already thought so. It isn't time for creative freedoms. I think we are supposed to focus on my suicide. For the sake of suicide. "Aha! Where we were last standing, one of the better reasons why I have roses elegantly and unevenly tattooed on my fingers. They're both cocked and one is in my mouth outright, while the other is at you. It was in your hands, and I gave you the tools necessary to save it. Save your belly aching. Every bit of paranoia, was it real, or were you trying to induce it? Save it for the masses. I know it's always a little bit of both. And that the most obvious answer is usually the truth. Variety is the best spice- and I'll have at my dad's pizza with way too much spice, for the loving good Grace from which Moses parted the water of life into place, (I am making a Tokyo MewMew joke that is a bit elongated) the V for which has He, Friends With Time, Drawer of Lord Excalibur when I actually love myself, rainbow gay pride I've forgotten uniciorn chapter books volume one and two powers activate!) *I start to turn, /now I am not paying attention to anything as I mash jokes into my own life story./

"This is what we paid for. This is disgusting filth. Think you can handle it?"

Think you can handle it? Would Filthy Frank even read this shit right here? We didn't even pay for all of these references. We're just hoping we get so many more people on team blue than team red so that we're able to just diss the suing right out of the waters like a lotus. Hah! Get that. I'm named after water so I'm doing water jokes. Listen, kid. I have heard a lot of jokes from the demons. You really don't want to start with me. I'm trained to accept them as a compliment, which I was saying back before we were all *I'm channeling Filthy Frank's voice in a ricefields sunhat visor right here* simple and shit. Now they are even trying to insult me with compliments and it's working. Listen, you never did knew that evil was good and proper and right. There was a new face of evil on the block, and it was the face of a genius sociopathic borderline child.

"Oh my God, You really do think like you're God."

[Guess what. Bitches, I have Autism so I cannot understand the emotional connotation in your words. Knowing that, I interpret it as fast as crazy, which is why no sweat because I also know that sometimes that's exactly what you're doing. Meaning I think of many ideas and crap. Your every thought could come to me like an intellectual process. I have no way of being.]

"Do you think you're special? Stay on topic please, I've seen we've gone a little socio today lady."

["I am silent. All is the same in my canoe which is made of wood and has travelled from hell through the underground rivers to the open and vast, great sea. Cold, or hot, shivering or sweating, thirst or hunger, war, famine, fire, flood, I know that I must and can navigate through it and 'round, 'round again, for this canoe and its lantern was tethered to my soul, it was tethered to my idea of neutral state meditation through chaotic forces. I was the canoe, one could say. I was the ship. Or the wood. The wood which came from the tree. Maybe The Tree. A Tree of Time, careful creature, making friends with it. And as the tree, and with brainwaves being like a tree, and all things one in the same, I made a hollow for those beyond to perch before they fade to worlds-"]

"This is artinery, itternerary(?) Get to the point."

[Often what I say, I sort of contribute to ghosts and other things.]

"This is what we get out of you? Jesus. (What are you, Santiago?) What happened to the sainthood?"

["Indeed I am Santiago, Another one of my many names, Dare ye say it, (Which they didn't.)]

"Look at what this kid is thinking of completely loaded. I think that maybe it is hilarious. Or perhaps all his excuses for crap."

[Indeed that all of this content was now filler. JENGA was on hiatus since the before times. We cannot remember those Interrogation Negotiations. But they were amazing. We have screenshots of half of them and had to delete the better half because they were too good and terrifying. We will try to interpret the rest of them someday (soon?).]

[The prophet wasn't just an excuse I made up. It was A Dream. A Dream that one day we will live not by the color of our skin, but by the confusing and complex mental makup which propels us towards the best future for us evolutionarily. Forget about that, everything. Like you have made me, by my words, let us start from the beginning.

Two systems learning from each other causes complex interactions to occur, especially when both have different and unfair advantages over each other. One could say each part of the brain that makes up the whole is its own complex system.]

"Stop talking about them to other people. I hope they rot for what they did to those people."

[Here is a classic bit where I have the chance to explain how either The Devil or The Enemy (FakeJudas2) Might try to make me look like the culprit. Reverse Psychology. It works on me. Which is why my card is chaotic. I don't want you to know what I'm doing, and if you do, then why should it matter what I do? It seems the whole world knows and yet no one knows. God knows what nobody feels like, because he is like us, we are made in his image. If I am nobody, he is nobody. So nobody knows just as well enough as anybody knows. But in both parts give or take, there are still bodies. Lot's of bloody and mutilated bodies which The Enemy has made of my Friends' & Loved One.]

/I take le break/

Depending on how serious JENGA gets, we have to use different members of the army through me. How did we get here, how is this all possible. It is a really meaningful story with lots of science, but we do not have infinite time. I will try to get to that at most.

"What about your boyfriend,"

["For the sake of Einstein, for the sake of proving you can go from Autism to full-blown socio, that realizing the brain works in the way that it does, and that it is all of your faults for being stupid assholes. It my fault for being a stupid asshole. And God is My Judge. Not You."]

"So, are you planning on telling him about any of this, or do you not know how important he is?"

["For the sake of insanity, genius is found."]

"Are you still completely avoiding the question? And how is it that he knows we're watching him for? Does he complete God in the blood?"

[Some things I do not understand. Or remember, or reitterate well. Catch me on drugs. Dattebayo! *flashback* Dattebayo was where it all started. The ten men, pandora's box, the stories, the puzzles, the lands across, the signs, a single time fine dining, and it is also there but not completely all-there.]

"So dattebayo was where it all started, huh? How embarrassing for one so wasted on the regular."

["Never giving up. Dattebayo. Believe it." "How about the story of the modulators some more? Before or after they were modulators? I have many stories to entertain you."]

"even when the conversation is all dead he has a way of going more crazy." a girl chimes in "He's probably been listening to what we are saying and considering it as JENGA."

he continues "Tell me a story to entertain me, that is what I am here for, give me a wild ride, show me some lude-icrous, something more, vivid, that shows me your kind of ideal lifestyle."

["You sounded like the villain in Tarzan for a second there. Well that's me, Tarzan. Me. Need. Jane. Didn't think I could play her. Rub the mud on my face, ask my monkey mother why I am not like them, she says to wipe the mud off.]

"I'm getting more curious, about what you're doing... you can write more than pages, you can write a book."

[I have, it's something I've always been working on. I've written loads of books, just lost, unpublished, deleted... How about I get really high and have someone speak through me now that we're getting down to the odds and ends. Let's get to the nitty-gritty of it. Once you find a way to constantly market off of things that might bother you, you have struck gold my son. The idea however, is to make them better, not worse, so they have a reason to last through the ages. Easier said than done...]

"He/She talks like an old wheezer. They can't- Can they hear me? Can they hear over our conversations? *plethoras of someones' breathy Oh my Gods" over everything. That means they know we're here, they can really hear us! Good job,"

[Did the dialogue switch into a ghosts' narration? It is hard to tell without any figures to watch with my eyes, and the words coming with systems built into a natural Ouija of my own. I won't literally raise hell again, yet... it is always tempted. And must be avoided. We're stepping too close to stories of old. The quantum questions must be pressed. Think harder. I don't know what it is you're thinking, I'm only typing. I am a genius if we aren't psychic, and a numbskull for God if we are All One.

The modulators can be set to different configurations, and put into different settings and events to see the initial outcomes in a module. At all of the Modulators worst configurations, M for their last name is capital. A good example of perfect awful configurations is religious reenactments by a family module within my own person. One's nature is that of a dads', Two is that of a moms', Three is that of a sons', four is that of a daughters', And the configurations always leans towards the predominantly biased neutral algorithyms.

Too much math, too may graphs to come, not sure how to organize it all, so we will have to say, partay.]

"So it feels like you're being taken advantage of by everything." my best friend asks me as my mom may also paranoidly be bothering my brother about me in the distance because I am typing so fast in the middle of the night.

[We've has this conversation before, so it's GroundHog day, only bigger, it's a show.]

"That's what we've been trying to tell you, You should write a show instead of bothering, us."

["Where is Jeremy Todd Ewbank?" I am the horseman, or headless, all the numbers, and the dungeon master because we currently already have a dab master, so you can Direct Message me the answer, Because I'm the Daniel Manual you've been looking for.]

"Jeremy Ewbank is not with us anymore. He's literally done. He can barely breath from your shit."

[The interrogations go haywire as soon as they begin again. Which one of us is being interrogated. "What happened to Jeremy Ewbank. Don't make me rhyme a hundred things with master in a bad rap. Aye, you know that gurl was my princess. You know, we know, we would never let go of or throw away one another, so where is he, *I put an invisible gun, but because I have written this, I will always be paranoid of them. We have to avoid them.

Evacuation Strategies: Red dots: Fun if you're a cat, dangerous if it is a gun. Shrodinger's Gun.

I take a break from interrogations because of laziness and lack of drugs. "JENGA," I claim, and the imaginary tower falls. How to explain a thing about creative manifestation to you, about all of the wild possibilities? So hard, I'd rather play Nintendogs for three hours.]

This is breaking bread with thine enemy

[brodymeetsworld]

This Christmas.

When I was a little girl, Christmas was my favorite holiday of the year. My grandmother would cook for days in preparation for the entire family( 6 grown children, 10 plus grandchildren) to gather around the table together (or the infamous kids table.) It was one of the only times of the year I was able see my extended family, and I soaked up every second of the time we had together. I have so many memories from learning how to cook with my Grandma, Aunts, and my oldest cousin Erin. To watching football in the living room with everyone including Granddaddy snoozing in “his chair”, to secretly learning how to play the card game “bullshit” (at a very young age I might add lol) with all of the cousins on the back enclosed porch. We would always end our evening the same way, after dinner we would sing the “Happy Birthday” song to Jesus, and because my little brother and I were the babies of the family, we usually got to blow out the candles on the cake. Afterwards, most of us would attend Christmas eve candlelight service at the Monterey Methodist Church. I didn’t get to go to Church very often, so these services were so special and beautiful to me. Those memories are some of the best memories of my childhood. 

After my grandparents passed away, the glue that held our extended family together dissolved. Everyone decided to host their own families for the holidays, and no longer wanted the financial or time burden to feed and host twenty-thirty family members. It saddens my soul to never see my aunts, uncles, or cousins anymore. The only way we see each other and communicate now is through social media or phone calls. One big portion of our family even moved half way across the country to Missouri, so the chances of seeing them anytime soon are slim. I truly haven’t felt the magic of Christmas since Christmas in Monterey, and that was 15 years ago.

After I met and married my husband, and when I became a mom, at the age of 26 and again at 27, I thought that magic would suddenly just appear again! Wrong, if anything, Christmas was harder all around. Not only did my two babies want nothing to do with Santa Clause, or the presents my husband and I worked so hard to buy, wrap, put together, but they were determined to destroy all of our decorations, including 3 separate artificial trees. I was completely emotionally and physically drained the first two Christmas’s with our children. I always just threw it off as of well this is life with two under two, or two under three. It never occurred to me, that one of my children may have special needs.

Fast forward to today, this will be my 30th Christmas. This will be my boys 4th and 5th Christmas. This year they have finally left our beautiful tree alone, and most of the presents underneath it as well. They both love to sing Christmas songs, and watch the snow fall on the ground. Our favorite thing to do right now is make Christmas crafts, and go searching for Christmas lights at night in the car. The proof of them growing and learning is obvious this year, and it brings so much joy to my heart. We also started going to church this year. What brought us to church was learning about our oldest son, Brody, diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder over Easter weekend this past year. 

You see, my husband and I always knew Brody was special, but we had no idea how special he really was. We were first time parents, and when Bentley came along just 14 months after his brother, we entered survival mode and did our very best. Looking back, I think Brody started showing signs of Autism shortly after his brother came into the world, around 16 months old. I was in denial for a long time, as well as my husband. I can remember looking back and thinking how hard it was in the beginning with both boys, and I never thought of the hard times as Brody being “abnormal”. I always blamed myself for “not being a good enough parent”, and that’s why he is crying all the time. Or “I’m not a good cook, that's why he won’t eat any of the meals I make for him”. And the one I really truly believed, “I guess I don’t talk to him enough and that's why he won’t speak”. All of these things would torment me every day, and all I could do was vent to my husband or his pediatrician. I even took him to see a ENT doctor determined because he had so many ear infections as a baby, maybe he had a hearing problem. It wasn’t until a close family member kept Brody over night that Autism even crossed our radar. Bless her heart too, she tried to tell me, but instead of accepting help, I was angry with her. The first time I reached out for help with our children and my biggest fear was being confirmed.(crazy when I think back, I really was scared of this diagnosis) I was so deep in denial there was nothing she could have done at that time that wouldn't have upset me. It took a toll on our relationship, and I regret the time we lost together over it.

Before we even received Brody’s diagnosis, we enrolled him into the special needs pre school in our county. He qualified right away, and he started right after his third birthday. He went from speaking one word sentences, to three to four word sentences in a year and half time so far, and most importantly he can communicate his needs and wants. His eating has improved, and we have a list of foods he will eat as oppose to 4 things total. Brody will dance with us down the hallway, and sing silly songs for us. He knows how to say please and thank you, I’ve been told by his teachers he is showing empathy to his classmates, and he can finally say “I love you, mommy” or “I love you, daddy” without signing them to us at the same time. All of these things are so bittersweet for us, because there was a time not too long ago we weren’t sure they were even a possibility. 

Easter 2019 comes, we receive our sons test results in the mail. If you’ve never read ADOS results before, they can be a bit confusing. My husband and I read the results, googled our sons comparison score of “4″, and thought he was on the severe end of the spectrum. It wasn’t until the next day did we find out we were wrong, Brody is in fact on the mild end of the spectrum. But the night before was rough, we both cried and cried. Why did we cry? I really don't know the answer to that question. When you receive a diagnosis for your child, no matter the diagnosis, a part of you inside just breaks into a million pieces. I can’t speak for my husband on this, but I know for myself, as a mom, I blamed myself for a long time. I spent so much time trying to think back through out my pregnancy with Brody what I could have done wrong. I think back through out his infancy what could have went wrong, “what did I do, what did I do that made him different.” The end of the school year was coming, and we have a yearly IEP meeting with all of Brody’s team members. In that meeting, the school psychologist who tested Brody, told us it was imperative for Brody to constantly be put into small social circles. She recommended t-ball, soccer, church, birthday parties, etc. So that is exactly what we did. Brody wasn’t old enough to enroll into sports in our county yet, so we accepted every single birthday party invite, and focused on finding a Church family.

We had several invites to different churches in our community, but because I myself hadn’t been to church in over 15 years, I was a nervous wreck deciding which church to attend. Going anywhere, by yourself (my husband works A LOT), with two rowdy boys is hard. It’s 10x harder when you have a child with Autism. I knew I had to get over my fears of my sons meltdowns, and do this not only for my sons social interaction sake, but also so our children could learn about our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. I always wanted to learn about the Lord when I was growing up, but no body ever wanted to wake up sunday morning to attend a church service with me. In fact, the only times I ever attended church was during Christmas or if I stayed the night with one of my friends whose family attended. Now its my turn, it’s my duty as a mother, and as a daughter of the King, to teach my children his word and of his sacrifice for all of us. 

I choose our church family, Redeeming Grace Outreach Worship Center. The boys and I go almost every sunday. Both boys wake up excited to go to church, and really enjoy singing and dancing for the Lord. After a bit of a transitioning period in the beginning, Brody will finally go to the nursery without mama having to be there too. I am finally able to read the bible and worship God and take something away from each and every service, and that truly has been a game changer in our life as a family. 

So for my 30th Christmas this year, this will be by far my best Christmas yet. Its been a year of ups and downs, a year of believing in miracles (Ezekiel Rhett), a year of building our faith, and a year of learning acceptance. Our son is exactly who he is supposed to be, and he was made in the eyes of our father. Through him, I’m learning exactly who I’m supposed to be too. God has a purpose for each and everyone of us, and our mighty King makes no mistakes. This Christmas will be magical because we made it that way.

#autismawareness #autismacceptance  

[grayisholi]

@ the DND ask game: ALL OF THOSE QUESTIONS, I CAN'T CHOOSE!! XD (or if not that, the ones you rlly wanna do!!

BOY OH BOY OH BOYIve been answering these throughout the day and I’m too lazy to reread the full document so sorry if I’ve left gaps or whatever but here it is! All 35 questions about dnd! Matt you unstoppable Madman.

1. A favorite character you have played.

You can’t just make me pick between my children!!! I think I might have to say Atticus Sallow, my faeborn bloodhunter, partially because he’s like 100% homebrew content which I LIVE for, but also because he’s probably the most kinda self-insert character I’ve ever played? Almost became the kinda angsty, brooding asshole character before he was like “get your shit together” and learned that loving people isn’t so bad.

2. Your favorite character that someone else has played.

I almost, ALMOST had the pleasure of DMing for @no-more-good-omens and their character was gonna be SO RAD and I’m a little heartbroken he never came to be. A half-drow paladin of Vecna, pretending to be your typical good and wholesome paladin? Dude, I love that kinda two faced backstabbing in a player. It’s such a shame it never came to anything (although if yall still wanna play hmu ;))

3. Your favorite side quest.

Ooh, there’s been so many good ones. Probably when i was playing as Adrian Smirks and went off on a tangent to rescue his brother ? That was the first time I ever got to see Adrian’s more raw and emotional side beneath the suave mask he wears and it was fun to explore his character in that way ^.^

4. Your current campaign.

That I’m DMing? It started inspired by Guy Fawkes and was gonna be “your party blows up parliament” but I got bored of following historical accuracy so it ended up being “blow up the palace in a magical city that just happens to be called London”. I accidentally wrote myself into a hole with this campaign tho, so once they’ve finished this arc I’m handing over the DM hat to my sister @philosophical-wanton because she seems to love it and I kinda miss being a player lmao. I can’t wait for it.

5. Favorite NPC.That I’ve written? Probably Hai Shen, the youngest son of a group of circus performers who were killed and the party got blamed for their murder. He had such a great attitude and his dynamics with the party kicked ass. And the twist that he was actually dead the whole time and it was his soul that had stayed behind to help solve his family’s murder? ICONIC.

6. Favorite death (monster, player character, NPC, etc).

NPC death would probably be Hai Shen, actually. After the party had brought the real killers (A cult to the demon Prince Orcus) to justice, Hai’s time on earth had come to an end. He had really beautiful moment with the party before being reunited with his family. Alternatively, the time I broke my entire party’s hearts? “Artagan’s staff comes cracking into Ellios’ chest, forcing him onto the ground. Artagan raises his sceptre in hand, pointing it menacingly at the young prince. And for the first time, you see him. Like, REALLY see him. He’s not the strong and powerful leader you’ve all come to know him as, he’s not Prince Ellios of the Four Realms. He’s just a boy. A boy who is much too young to be involved in such a grand scheme. And the fear in his eyes. You see the fear he’s managed to keep buried for so long, finally coming to the surface. And then? You don’t see anything, aside from his cold body hitting the ground.” I got punched three times for that moment, but GOD was it worth it.

7. Your favorite downtime activity.

Like in game? A healthy lil bit of vandalising the local law enforcement buildings is always a good time.

8. Your favorite fight/encounter.

Aw man, how can I pick ? I gotta say, that one time we, a level 6 party, managed to take down two earth elementals was pretty rad. The DM kind of expected it to be one of those encounters that we saw and immediately tried to run from, but what she didn’t take into account was that ALL of us had chaotic alignments so we just went crazy. The DM was rolling really badly (thank God) and we were getting really creative (“I use the produce flame centripetal to light my bottle of ale on fire and create a molotov cocktail” “you do WHAT”) and after like an HOUR we won and it was amazing. The rush I got from that victory was better than any drug my dood.

9. Your favorite thing about D&D.

I know I say it a lot, but I legit can’t choose. There’s so many great things about ttrpgs that a lot of people don’t really think of. The creative fulfilment I get from a session is incomparable, the friendships you can build that you couldn’t form in any other way. And like, not to get too real for a sec here, but I grew up with undiagnosed autism and didn’t understand how a lot of social situations worked, and DnD was such a good mechanic for me to try communicating with people without many real world consequences, and I appreciate that experience so much. It’s just such a great thing my dood.

10. Your favorite enemy and the enemy you hate the most.

Can they be the same thing lmao? I mean, I’m obviously partial to Count Cassius, the vampire lord that Adrian slept with lmao. I also always appreciate a good beholder, until I get hit with three disintegration rays IN A ROW.

11. How often do you play and how often would you ideally like to play?

We’ve got kind of a monthly schedule with my main campaign, and I manage to get a couple online games in-between them, but honestly I’d kill to be the kind of group that got together every weekend.

12. Your in game inside jokes/memes/catchphrases and where they came from.

Oh MAN. “I say we do this.” “Yeah, but that’s coming from the guy who decided to tie 3 50ft ropes together to escape the palace.” “iT wOrKeD dIdN’t iT ???” i.e that time I forgot I gave the gnome rogue flying boots so when I planned for them to get arrested at the palace, they managed to escape by tying their ropes together, sending the gnome with it to the top and climbing the wall. I had to improvise the rest of the session. Also “FLINTON BELINDA SKINTON” bc as a role-play exercise I got my party to come up with rumours about their characters and the gnome rogue called Flint AKA Flinton B Skinton decided that one of their rumours was that the B stood for Belinda, and it was GLORIOUS.

13. Introduce your current party.

My current group consists of Flinton B Skinton, gnome rogue. He’s a quick-fingered, silver-tongued gay disaster who can sell anything to anyone. He’s a charming flirt, and a veritable genius in his own right. Kava Daardendrian, dragonborn ranger who loves nothing in life more than her animal companion - her pig Snortin Norton. She’s fun and sassy and shameless, she’s great. There’s Sparks, the fire Genasi Monk, and full embodiment of a disaster lesbian. She drinks, fights, and gets laid, and doesn’t deal with her problems in healthy ways. An icon. And finally Milo, the halfling Bard who falls in love at the drop of a hat and just wants everyone to get along. I call them “The Shenanigang” and I love them.

14. Introduce any other parties you have played in or DM-ed.

A party I joined late? We had Sylvia Moondrop, the half elf sorcerer who was just trying to get along with everyone despite what the world seemed to want. Orland the half orc bard who was just trying to shake off the Barbarian stereotype his family left him with. Rose Morleen, air Genasi fighter who was literally born to kick ass and take names. I joined as Mason Terrai, the Earth Genasi Alchemist with a perchance for explosives. The very definition of chaotic neutral.

15. Do you have snacks during game times?

Of COURSE. What manic wouldn’t ?

16. Do you play online or in person? Which do you prefer?

I used to play online a LOT back before I had friends who were into dnd, but I VASTLY prefer playing in person. The chemistry that’s built not only amongst the players, but also the actual characters themselves is unparalleled. It’s just such a great experience.

17. What are some house rules that your group has?

Anyone can attempt anything, the only restriction is the dice. Don’t question the DM unless it’s out of session, then bully the dm on the groupchat until he’s so pissed off he gives you inspiration just to get you to shut up. And also canon lore and canon rules are bullshit when it’s convenient. That’s about it

18. Does your party keep any pets?

Our ranger, God bless her, has her pack pig Snortin Norton, sold to her by one Flinton B Skinton. And Flint really wants a monkey, he’s been trying to find one for ages.

19. Do you or your party have any dice superstitions?

Not really ? I’m the kind guy that if my dice rolls a 1 I will bench it for a bit, but tbh all my dice are cursed af and I’ve kinda just learned to roll with it by making my characters canonically terrible at everything lmao.

20. How did you get into D&D? How long have you been playing?

Aw man I can’t remember when or how, it’s been so long. I had a couple friends who were kinda into it, but all the games they tried to run were complete disasters. I only really started playing I’m the past year or so? Maybe a little more ? Adrian was my first character, and he was a very RP heavy character in a party of tanks and they all hated him but MAN was it fun.

21. Have you ever regretted something your character has done?

Oh all the time. One time my character was careless and didn’t check for traps on a legendary artefact and it lead to the death of a party member. One time my character got angry at his party and walked out. My characters don’t make good decisions, but that’s part of the fun.

22. What color was your first dragon?

White! I thought it was silver at first and went to go say hi, and it clawed me within half my HP straight away lmao.

23. Do you use premade modules or original campaigns?

Oh dude, original all the way. I live for that shit.

24. How much planning/preparation do you do for a game?

Depends on the session, but usually a good few hours, couple of days if I’m DMing.

25. What have your players done that you never could have planned for?

“You wake up in a mysterious forest. The strained autumn sun shines through the trees. The only thing you can see it each other, the trees, and an old sign post leading to a path that says "Myrrill” on it. What do you do?“ "We walk in the opposite direction of the sign deeper into the forest.” “…of course you do.”

26. What was your favorite scene to write and show your characters.

I wrote a full carnival show one time for them to watch, and then it got derailed when a horrific monster attacked. But writing all the characters and their acts, and watching my players get entranced as I described it ? Magical, my dood.

27. Do you allow homebrew content?

I live and breathe homebrew content. I don’t know what my games would be without it. I LOVE homebrew.

28. How often do you use NPCs in a party?

I make some pretty sick characters if I do say so myself, so I throw them in a LOT.

29. Do you prefer RP heavy sessions or combat sessions?

Oh dude, role play all the way. Fighting and killing stuff is great, but role-play is just so good. We can go from laughing with a bartender to crying over a backstory reveal and it’s just beautiful.

30. Are your players diplomatic or murder hobos?

Depends on the party, but i find the best players are a little bit of both XD

31. What is your favorite class? Favorite race?

Official ? I’m a fan of the hexblade warlock? Bards are always a good call, and to be real playing monks make me feel like an absolute badass. Race wise, there are just so many. If we’re only talking players handbook stuff, half elf is always rad. Outside of that? I’ve been researching the Shadar-Kai lately and I’m LIVING. They’re so rad.

32. What role do you like to play the most? (Tank/healer/etc?)

What would you call the disaster gay? I don’t really gear my characters towards usefulness in combat, so it’s just whatever the class happens to lend itself to.

33. How do you write your backstory, or do you even write a backstory?

I usually write my character, personality, backstory, alignment etc, before I even pick a class or even a race. I basically just make OCs and apply them to dnd rules, and it’s SO much fun. 10/10, would recommend.34. Do you tend pick weapons/spells for being useful or for flavor?

FLAVOUR. My party usually hates me, but what I lack in combat utility I more than make up for in creative out of combat skill checks XD.

35. How much roleplay do you like to do?

Boi, I even RP my combat, and the great thing is it rubs off on my party too. I’ll have a really low initiative and everyone else will be like “I attack and do 10 points of damage” but then on my round I’m like “I use my staff to leap across the battlefield towards the opponent and launch out with a spinning kick to their jaw” and everyone else is like “oh, okay, that’s what we’re doing.” and the battle becomes so much more dynamic and cinematic, it’s amazing !

[roccoroks]

Anti-vax... The new crazy?

We have all been there, talking to someone that regardless of sound fact, reason or otherwise will never back down from an argument. Someone that is so lost in their convictions that they feel the need to impress them upon everyone within ear shot. Right wing, left wing, Sanders supporters, Trump supporters... They all have a place reserved in the loony bin for their 10% of loud assholes who shout without thinking first. I’m not here to berate anyone about bout their political beliefs, that is not the kind of guy I am. I’m here to berate an entirely different group of people, and not necessarily just anti-vax people... I’m here to berate people who... change the facts and set rules to their own arguments.   We were all young once, obviously, and in that time would would make friends and play games. But sometimes we would run into little johnny son of a bitch who just had to win an argument or a game. They would set rules that will ensure them an automatic victory and lord them over you. How does this equate to today’s anti-vax argument? let’s take a look at a very distilled down argument... Vaxer: I’m taking my kids to be vax’d on wensday 

Anti-vaxer: Vaxing causes autism and poor fuel mileage, you should never vax your kids! Vaxer: I have done research and I do not believe this is true. Anti-vax: It is to true! This website filled with boner pill ads and endless spam site traps sites real studies!  Vaxer: Those sites are bunk! They cherry pick data and drive a false narrative. Anti-vax: Oh really? Where do you get this information from? Vaxer: Studying the actual results of the study, researching the guidelines of the criteria they used. Anti-vaxer: Well... vaccines contain MERCURY!  And a whole host of other chemicals that are BAD! Vaxer: Those BAD chemicals are safe in the chemical compositions in which they are placed in the vaccine. Mercury absorption rates vary wildly dependent on what form they are in. Anti-vax: And where did you get this information? Vaxer: In high school and by not sleeping through chemistry class... Anti- vaxer: Ha! I knew it! Government funded education! They taught you what they want you to think!  See, no matter what you say to people like this, they will just change the rules and refuse logic as if it were a fuming bowl of mercury salts. Despite the fact that we have advanced so much in life on the planet due to science, people will bend and break it to their will to feel validated. Holy are those who truly find pleasure in the facts and having the willingness to stand up to people like that. If you were to push the thread of the anti-vax argument and truly debunk everything they ever said with solid fact, some would still change their narrative. They would claim that you are brain washed and that you are yourself unwilling to see reason.  To people like that, there are no facts. Only right and wrong. They are willing to believe in something so preposterous as a global conspiracy to be right. Big companies do their far share of evil, we all know this, but they also do a lot of good. But to some people, they are unwilling to see any good if they are searching for evil and vice-versa. But for someone in the anti-vax camp, and ounce of evil will out weight a metric ton of good.

 Big pharma did some shady things and to them they are therefore evil. That makes anything they have to say wrong regardless of fact. If a scientific study comes out and proves vaccines to be in a good light... They are evil because they 1. Do not fit the narrative and 2. once took money to fudge a study. Never mind that it was not them that took the money, some group somewhere, doing the same line of work they are doing did it, therefore everything they say is suspect. Even if they have a flawless track record, even if they support some of their movement. Nope! it’s all or nothing baby! This kind of mentality has got to come to an end! Self validation is now causing mass hysteria and stupidity. Not ignorance, stupidity. I firmly believe in this day and age, where you can watch a youtube video and build a house to code, ignorance is no excuse! Q: Why does the government and vaccine companies have millions set aside for ‘in the event of’?  A: The first check you write is for the home the second is for the insurance... it would be daft to think everything in this world went perfectly all the time. one slip, one accident and millions are effected. Vaccines are a medical product. Even if they did not have insurance set aside for something to happen, then people would site that the program is too dangerous because of it. That argument has been cropping up lately and I felt the need to site it here and now.  So in closing, people want things to be cut and dry, on and off, black and white. our brains crave answers, so much so that our brains will reason things to the best of our ability to what it wants to see. Validation is a hell of a thing and we crave it like water in the Sahara, the two go hand in hand. When we reason to ourselves that we have the right information, we are validated and when someone tries to prove us wrong, we fight back to continue on our dopamine fueled ride of stupidity.  Listen to both sides, use your brain objectively.       

[meggtheegg]

not sure if you've already done this, but Evan rankings?

YES I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS OKAY 

EDIT - I put them into chronological order because I feel iffy about listing them from “best” to “worst” because they’re all wonderful 

Ben Platt - Ben is the original. He won a Tony, and he deserved it. His portrayal is what most people think of when they hear “Evan Hansen.” He keeps Evan really specific but also very broad and open to interpretation. He’s a very relatable Evan that everyone can see themselves in, at least a little. He’s intensely emotional, his voice is stellar, and he’s just overall amazing. There’s not much I can say that hasn’t been said yet. The only reason I put the other two above him are 1. I saw them both live and have not seen Ben Platt on anything but a bootleg,  2. I do kinda have to suspend my disbelief about him being a teenager, and 3. I can’t unsee Elder Cunningham. So yeah, my own issues, not Ben’s. He’s awesome. I love him.

Michael Lee Brown - Hands down, my favorite Evan. By far. MLB is brilliant and had he been the original Evan instead of Ben Platt, I am convinced he would have gotten the Tony. His Evan is real and raw and so so emotional. His scene before You Will Be Found is the most uncomfortable thing in the world to witness, and you know he wants it that way. He stays on the floor for so long, having a panic attack so intense that his face goes red and you can see the veins in his neck and whenever you think he’s been going for long enough that he must be about to regroup, he just keeps going. He has consistent tics and fidgets that don’t feel planned or faked. He doesn’t try to justify Evan doing bad things. When he yells at Heidi or dismisses Jared, you get mad at him. But when it all comes down to it, you love him and feel empathy for him because he is so human. He makes dumb mistakes but he’s not defined by those mistakes. And he looks the part better than any of the others, in my opinion. In terms of character, I feel like actors tend to either interpret him as either having social anxiety or autism. Both are super valid and both make sense, but (probably due to personal experience) I usually tend to prefer the latter. My younger brother is Evan’s age, and he’s on the spectrum. He’s not usually crazy about theatre, but he was captivated when we took him to Dear Evan Hansen. He said it felt like he was watching himself onstage, and I don’t know if that’s Michael Lee Brown’s intention, but it sure as hell seems to be, and it sure looks like he did his research.

Colton Ryan - Colton was my second Evan, and honestly I think he is so underrated. The bootleg that’s out there does not capture what a fantastic Evan he is. He falls on the other side interpretation-wise, unquestioningly portraying anxiety, and boy does he do it well. Maybe it’s just because he’s very “conventionally attractive” or whatever, but his Evan seems like the kind of guy who could be one of the most popular kids in school if he wasn’t so afraid to talk to people. His Evan is witty and not exactly sure of himself, but he knows who he is and what he could be. He sees his own potential, if that makes sense. “Waving Through A Window” is a little less “I’m invisible and there’s nothing I can do about it” and a little more “I know what I have to do to get noticed, but the idea of that terrifies me.” His physicality is unbelievable and it makes his “Words Fail” in particular extremely powerful. In the beginning of the show, he is hunched over, looking at the floor, trying to make himself as small as physically possible without looking awkward. As the show goes on and he gets more and more confident, you can see him slowly start to stand up straighter and look people in the eye and become more and more confident, but it happens so gradually that you don’t even really notice it’s happening until a moment in “Words Fail,” where he shrivels right back down as everything collapses around him. It’s remarkable. He’s fantastic. Also, his Evan fixes some kind of problematic elements. Because of the way he plays him, his medication feels less like it was prescribed to be taken daily and more of a “take only as needed” thing. So, when his confidence grows and he stops taking it, it feels a little more like the “success” that Heidi sees it as. It’s such a little thing, but it always bugged me that a nurse would be proud of her son going off his meds. 

Noah Galvin - Noah is a wonderful comedic actor. I love him in The Real O’Neals, and I feel like if he’d been cast as Jared, he’d be very high on that list, because he’s got a real skill for finding glimmers of depth in the comic relief. But for me, personally, his Evan leaned a little too hard on comedy and that made his emotional moments a little less impactful. His singing voice is stellar and his chemistry with the rest of the cast was undeniable. I’m always happy to see him pop up in their Instagram stories. But, casting a comedic actor in an extremely serious, emotional role that’s way out of their comfort zone, though an interesting idea, is a real risk. A good friend of mine saw him and loved him, though, so again, this is very much my issue. I think I have a vision of what Evan should be, and that vision is pretty much just MLB’s portrayal, and Noah’s is the most different from his. So, yeah

Taylor Trensch - Now, quick disclaimer, I saw Taylor during Mike Faist’s final performance, so my focus wasn’t quite on him and he’s so sweet that he may very well have toned his own stuff down a little to highlight Mike, but his Evan, for me, was a little hit-and-miss. He tries a lot of new things that nobody else brings to the table and I definitely applaud him for that. It didn’t work for me, personally, but that doesn’t mean he’s not good. His Evan is less obviously anxious. He has more of a confidence issue than full-blown social anxiety, and he’s very, very friendly, even in scenes where most actors kind of have him acting like a dick. He’s obviously unaware of when he’s hurting Jared’s feelings, not actively trying to exclude him, but almost buying into the idea that Jared doesn’t like him and giving him permission to leave him alone. And when arguing with Heidi, he sees himself as a victim of her anger who doesn’t have a need to really defend himself because he doesn’t seem to see why any of it would upset her. Where other Evans are hyper-aware of how their actions affect the people around them, Taylor’s is kind of blissfully unaware of the mess he’s gotten himself into until “Good For You.” It’s an interesting take, for sure, and I can see why people really love him. Also, his scene with Heidi before “So Big, So Small” is the best out of all of them. He’s so overwhelmed and afraid to admit everything to his mom and he’s crying so hard that he can barely get the words out and it was incredible.

Ben Levi Ross -I’ve only been able to catch snippets of Ben, but so far, I enjoy his Evan. He’s going to be amazing on tour, and I’m so glad he has that opportunity. Even after only going on a few times, he’s already so good and I look forward to seeing his Evan evolve over time. As I said with his Connor, oh my lord his voice is just…so nice.

Stephen Christopher Anthony - I’ve literally only heard his WTAW but I am already in love. He’s so good.