#goldie is a bad influence

[aaandbackstabbed]

Goldie: that is dishonest, disrespectful and deceitful

Louie: so you’re in?

Goldie: I thought that was obvious

[ratatatastic]

my favourite thing is that its been 3 weeks and we're still asking about the tincan ocean mishap and how it wasnt supposed to happen in the way that it did.

"i did not know that wasnt allowed i promise you...we had nobody with us to say matthew dont be an idiot dont do that" and other lies to tell yourself

KSDK News | 7.18.24 (x)

Sun Sentinel | 6.28.24 (x)

"i think somebody said its technically not allowed but i said it was too late it already happened" oh so there was someone who did do a matthew dont be a idiot dont do that to him but it was AFTER the fact huh and they only allowed this to happen on the terms that the cup wouldnt touch the water...

so heres matthew dunking the cup into the ocean and also matthew and ekky throwing benny overboard during the incident in question and yes multiple local news sources had to reassure viewers afterwards that cup in saltwater should be fine (it was not fine)

Las Olas Beach | 6.25.24 (x)(x)(x)

[benny pic came from his igstory so we mourn the fallen sourcelink o7]

heres them bringing up the cup ocean incident while sasha was in wimbledon to cheer on his gf and guest starred on the volkswagen desk for a bit a week after the incident

Wimbledon Championships 2024 | 7.4.24 (x)

and its so funny he says that he knows saltwater is bad for the cup because...

id like to bring up exhibit A (written account of him bringing the cup over to the beach which incited the cup ocean incident)

and exihibit B (visual of him bringing the cup over to the beach which once again incited the cup ocean incident)

it isnt clear if sasha was aware of the whole "dont dunk the corrosive metal into the ocean" before or after the incident i just think its particularly funny how now he has to go on tv and go yeah that was bad we cant do that from now on like a scolded kitten

and also brady getting upset over not getting credited for the idea because this is what matthew said about it when asked the day after it happened

Pat McAffe Show | 6.26.24 (x)(x)

is he absolutely in every right to get a little pissy about it? yes. does it also make him seem even more like a little brother in the process especially with the way matthew had to go BY THE WAY. IT WAS BRADYS IDEA. AND HE WAS MAD AT ME FOR NOT SAYING THAT SO IM SAYING THAT NOW BUT ONLY AFTER TARYN BROUGHT IT UP. oh yeah absolutely. from one little brother to another it very much reads like that.

EDIT: it was actually ellie his fiancee who quips this because she was in attendance during the hospital visit (youll see her in the bg here) when this interview takes place and that makes it even cuter that she was like hey remember to give your baby brother credit oh this family is so cute 😭😭

[3lectricinsomnia]

Sometimes I think about that emd kendratello art you did and its so funny to think about 2 who is fully on board with destroying all humans like. Bringing a human girl home to draxum and 1 and being like this is kendra she stole my tech and shot me in the leg, I'm obsessed with her and am thinking about her carnally 24/7. Like what could possibly be the reaction to that. Even if he's living with the Hamatos at that point. How could you possibly respond to 'i want her because she wants me dead'.

Oh, One hates Kendra regardless if she's just an acquaintance, friend, or girlfriend. He hates her. He thinks she's a bad influence on his brother and she is. In One's eyes, Kendra encourages Two's recklessness, puts him in constant danger and has no regard for his feelings or safety.

For Two, I think Kendra makes him feel validated and useful, but he hates her because she uses him for his tech. When it comes down to it, Kendra knows that Two is smarter so whenever she compliments him, she means it even if she's planning to double cross him later and steal his stuff lmao. I kinda picture their general relationship to be sorta like Scrooge and Goldie from DuckTales 2017. They're enemies but they have their moments We won't incorporate a romantic relationship in the fic, but I will say that EMD Kendra is very loyal to the Purple Dragons and if she and Two were to establish a bond, she could potentially be very loyal to him too.

The Kendratwollo piece in question..

[justagalwhowrites]

Halcyon - Ch. 5: I've Never Been a Bad Influence a Day in My Life

You and Joel get closer as you put together your lists. A continuation of Halcyon from the prologue through Ch. 4, a modern no outbreak AU TLOU fic found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Masturbation, fantasy about P in V sex. Modern No Outbreak AU, No use of Y/N, Slow burn, 18+ only, Minors DNI

Length: 5K

AO3 | Main Master List | Prologue | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

October, 2022

“Why can’t I add to your list?” You pouted a little, can of hard seltzer in your hand as your float drifted to the middle of Joel’s pool. 

“Because you’re gonna just use that power for evil, not good,” Joel replied. 

“Would not!” You shoved off the side of the pool with your foot, floating back toward the middle of the water. 

“Am I allowed to put shit on your list?” He asked, sitting on the edge of the pool, his feet in the water and a beer in his hand. 

You scoffed. 

“Absolutely not.” 

“Well, there you go,” he shrugged. “Goes both ways.” 

“You’d be a dick about it!” You kicked the water in his direction but the spray of it fell short and you watched him try to not laugh. “You’d put things on there like ‘buy Joel beer for the rest of his life’ or ‘speak in a bad British accent for a week…’”

“Can you do a good British accent?” He asked, brows raised. 

“That is beside the point.” 

“What are you gonna add to my list, hm?” There was a teasing edge in his voice as he took a sip of beer. “Get a new wardrobe? Get Sarah a dog?” 

“OK, both of those are good additions,” you said, defensive. “But no, not what I was thinking.” 

“Then what, Goldie?” 

“Put in a hot tub,” you said, chin raised. 

He barked a laugh. 

“A hot tub?” 

“A hot tub,” you nodded. “How can I come over to your house and float in the water if it’s too cold to go in the pool? Which it will be in like… a few weeks. You need a hot tub.” 

“It’s already too cold,” he said. “That water’s below 70 degrees, couldn’t pay me to get in there now. Lucky I’m in this far as it is.” 

“See?” You said. “Hot tub.” 

“You’re ridiculous,” he shook his head. 

“If your list is shitty can I add to it?” 

“If you actually think my list is shitty we can discuss it,” he said. Your float drifted close to him and you were afraid, for a moment, that he was going to splash you. Instead, he just pushed the edge of it with his foot, sending you drifting back toward the middle of the water. “Still down to compare tomorrow night?” 

“Think so,” you said, taking a sip of your seltzer. “As long as you don’t mock me relentlessly for it.” 

“When do I not mock you relentlessly?” 

“Excellent point,” you said. “I should get better friends.” 

“Probably so.” 

“At least now you come with Sarah,” you sighed dramatically. “So I guess I’ll keep bugging you…” 

“God, you two are gonna kill me,” he said, trying to look serious but a hint of a smile on his lips. “Worst idea I ever had, lettin’ you two get to know each other…” 

You giggled a little at that. You and Sarah had become thick as thieves since you and Joel had reconnected now two weeks ago.

It was hard to believe that he’d only been back in your life less than a month. But then, it was hard to believe he’d ever been out of your life at all. You’d only gone a few days without seeing him since that night at the bar and, on those days, the two of you were almost constantly texting. It was the most natural thing in the world, having your life fall into step alongside Joel’s. It reminded you so much of high school even though you were in your 30s now, your lives moving in parallel until they collided at the end of the day and you came over for dinner or went and cheered on Sarah at her soccer game or Joel showed up at your door with beer. Even after all this time, he just knew you and you just knew him. You could read his posture as easily as a book, instantly knowing the kind of day he had by the way he opened the door or flopped on your couch. He seemed to be able to peer inside your mind on command, just a raised eyebrow or a sigh telling him everything he needed to know about how you were feeling and how to make it better. 

There was one day where you hadn’t intended to see him at all but it’d turned shitty and he just somehow picked up on it from the tone of your texts. New paperwork had come over from Gale’s attorney and you resigned yourself to spending the evening picking over the bones of your marriage with a bottle of wine and a wilted salad - because you definitely didn’t have the emotional energy to go by the grocery store - when Joel texted. It was a meme that you responded to with just an lol before going back to the paperwork. He FaceTimed just 30 seconds later and you frowned, answering it. 

“Hi?” You said brows raised. 

He nodded sagely. 

“What I thought,” he said. “You look like shit.” 

“Gee thanks.” 

He rolled his eyes. 

“For you you look like shit. What’s wrong.” 

You narrowed your eyes and he laughed. 

“What?” He asked

“How can you just tell?” You replied. “It’s weird.” 

“Come over,” he said instead of answering. He flipped his camera around and Sarah made a face, sticking her tongue out, her hair in two springy buns on the top of her head. 

You frowned. 

“Where are you?”

He turned the camera back around.

“Picking up pizza,” he said. “I’ll grab an extra cheese bread, come over.” 

“I’ve been drinking…” 

“We’ll pick you up,” he said. “Come over.” 

“Please?” Sarah jumped to try to get in the frame and Joel laughed, tilting the camera so she was visible. “It’ll be fun! OH! Spend the night! Come sleep over again, please?” 

Joel tilted the camera so he was back in the frame. 

“You really wanna disappoint my kid?” He asked. “C’mon.” 

“Yeah!” Sarah said, bouncing just out of frame again, just a bit of her bun appearing in the bottom corner as she jumped. “Don’t let down the kid, that’s just shitty.” 

“Hey,” Joel said but you could tell he was trying not to smile. She stopped bouncing. “Language.” 

“Sorry.” 

He turned his attention back to you. 

“Be there in 10,” he said. “Can’t let you just sit and wallow. Need pizza for that.” 

He and Sarah picked you up and Sarah insisted on cranking Taylor Swift in the car, signing Look What You Made Me Do into her water bottle in the back seat while you balanced warm pizza boxes on your lap, trying not to laugh when you and Joel exchanged glances at red lights. 

At dinner, you pulled a pepperoni off your slice of pizza and stuck it on the end of your nose and held very serious eye contact with Joel and Sarah as they spoke, nodding along carefully so as to not disturb the topping dangling from your face. Sarah tried very hard not to laugh and did a pretty good job of it until you made a face at her from across the table when Joel’s back was turned and she cackled, laughing so hard she almost knocked over her soda can.

“You bein’ a bad influence on my kid?” He asked when he handed you the paper towel you’d requested.

“Joel,” you said, deathly serious, pepperoni slice still on the tip of your nose. “I’ve never been a bad influence a day in my life.” 

 After dinner, as Joel did the dishes, you sat on the couch with Sarah and listened as she told you about one of her friends at school who hadn’t been as kind lately. You nodded along until Sarah seemed to run out of steam, slumping down against the cushion with a slightly tired look on her face. 

“Well,” you said. “Have you told her that you’ve been feeling hurt by how she’s been treating you lately?” 

She scrunched her face a little. 

“No,” she said. “But I thought that’d be pretty obvious…” 

You shrugged. 

“Sometimes it’s not. She may not even know she’s doing it. If I were you, I’d tell her that you’ve been feeling hurt and ask if she’s doing OK because it sounds like this is a change for her. If she’s hurting you that might be because her feelings are getting hurt somewhere else.” 

“I hadn’t thought of that,” she nodded a little. “That’s a good idea.”

“I do have those occasionally,” you said and she smiled a little at you. 

The three of you watched part of a movie before Sarah went to get ready for bed and you eavesdropped from the living room as Joel read to her in her room, the door opened just enough to hear when his voice changed with the characters. 

“Peeta sighs,” Joel said like Joel before his voice shifted to something that sounded more boyish but still strong and deep, almost what you remembered from when you first met him. You smiled. “'Well, there is this one girl. I’ve had a crush on her ever since I can remember. But I’m pretty sure she didn’t know I was alive until the reaping…’”

Joel flopped next to you on the couch when he was done and you held out your glass of wine. He took it, taking a big sip before handing it back. 

“You look tired,” you said, holding the glass. 

He shrugged. 

“No days off from this whole dad thing. Don’t really want a day off but still… get tired after a bit.” He looked over at you and smiled a little. “Thanks for talking with her. Think she needs someone like you around.” 

“Oh, someone who managed to tank her relationship and got stuck starting over in her 30s?” You asked. “That kind of someone?” 

He rolled his eyes. 

“A woman…” 

“Oh, is that all?”

He glared at you. 

“A woman,” he said again. “But one who’s lived some life, knows how to navigate the hard shit. One who’s willing to listen to her problems. She’s got me and Tommy for that but can’t help but feel like I’ve let her down by not giving her some kind of… I don’t fuckin’ know, feminine influence.” 

“Ahh yes, the mysterious feminine,” you nodded sagely. Joel picked up a pillow and smacked you in the stomach with it, making you laugh as you caught it and held it to yourself. “Joel, you’re doing great with her.” 

“Yeah?” He asked, serious now. 

“Yeah,” you said, serious, too. “You really are. She’s so lucky to have you, Joel. You have no idea.” 

“I’m lucky to have her,” he said, looking toward Sarah’s room for a moment before turning back to you. “So, you have the kind of bad day that you want to talk about it or the kind of bad day that you want to get fucked up about it?” 

“The latter.” 

“Then chug that wine,” he said, shoving himself off the couch. “And maybe change into your pajamas, I’m getting the tequila.” 

You swapped numbers with Sarah at breakfast the next day. You and Joel were both hung over and trying to pretend like you hadn’t been up until 2:30 on a work night getting hammered until you passed out in a heap on his couch only to be roused by a groggy Sarah at 7 in the morning. 

She’d taken to texting you then, sometimes just silly selfies, sometimes memes you didn’t really get, sometimes with questions about friends at school. You were pretty sure your heart melted the first time she called you Aunt Goldie, a sense of belonging wrapping around you that you’d never really known before. 

“We still on for tomorrow?” Joel asked, eyes following the slow, lazy path your float was making across his pool. “Make a night out of this whole project, kick things off right.” 

“Hell yeah,” you said, drifting back to Joel. He didn’t shove you back out to the water this time. “Did I tell you I’m seeing Anna for lunch? I cannot just go into that blind, I’ll need an out…” 

“She’s doin’ that well, huh?” Joel asked. 

“I don’t know,” you sighed. “She’s supposedly sticking with her program but… I feel like I should be a better sister and try to check in more but then it just feels like babysitting and that doesn’t seem right, either.” 

“At a certain point, she’s gotta do it on her own,” Joel said. “You’re her sister, not her mom.” 

“I know,” you nodded. “But I feel like I should have checked in on her more after our mom died. She was a teenager and I just left her alone…” 

“You were 20 years old,” Joel said gently. “Not like you were equipped for that shit.” 

You shrugged and took another drink. 

“Hey,” he said, nudging your float gently, just enough to make you look up at him. “Don’t be hard on yourself for that. You were handed a shit situation and you did what you could with it. Trust me, I know.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Ended up in a similar boat with Tommy. Spent years - literal years - bailing his ass out of jail and begging him to get his shit together. Eventually he did a stint in the army and got it figured out. At least a bit. She’ll get there. But it’s not your job to get her there.” 

“Yeah,” you sighed. “You’re probably right.” 

“Who, me?” He asked, mocking. “Right? Never thought I’d see the day…” 

“Shove it,” you splashed at him, the water dripping down his face and soaking his t-shirt. You snorted as you watched him fight the urge to laugh. 

“Gonna pay for that,” he said, setting his beer down on the side of the pool and grabbing your float as you tried to paddle away. 

“No!” You shrieked and laughed, shoving your seltzer into the cupholder as more of you ended up in the cold pool water than you really wanted in your rush to escape. 

“You started it!” Joel was leaning precariously over the water now, trying to splash you again while keeping you from retreating. “Shoulda just kept those little hands to yourself…” 

“They’re not little!” 

He yanked your float back toward the side of the pool and nodded down at one of your hands.

“Freakishly small…” 

“Yours are just freakishly big you mutant!” You grabbed a fistful of his shirt and watched as he realized a second too late what was about to happen. 

“Oh shit,” his eyes went wide and you laughed in victory before you pulled him all the way into the pool, jeans and all. He brought you down as he went, the float capsizing and sending you and your mostly empty drink can into the cold water with a sharp yelp. 

You went under, the chlorine stinging your eyes as you twisted and tried to right yourself below the water. You and Joel surfaced at the same time, not even a foot apart and gasping for breath, laughing as you tried to brush your soaked hair back from your face. 

“It’s so cold!” You shivered and splashed at him before crossing your arms tightly over yourself. 

“Why are you complainin’ to me?” He shivered back. “You’re the one who wanted to be in the damn pool…” 

“In the floatie!” You said. “I was mostly dry until you got involved!” 

“Got justice you mean,” he said, reaching for your can and pulling it out of the water, dumping it out before setting it on the side of the pool. “You’re the one who put us in here…” 

“You’re the one who was being mean,” you said, reaching out for him and pressing your cold fingers to his chest, the heat of him still apparent even in the water. You sighed contentedly. “That’s better…” 

“Jesus, what are you, ice?” He griped, tugging you against him with a little yelp. “Gonna fuckin’ freeze to death if you’re not careful… ridiculous…” 

You giggled once but pressed yourself closer to him, soaking up his heat and pressing your cold fingers to his exposed skin. 

“OK, you could be less mean about it,” he said, pulling back from you just enough to scowl down at you. “Frozen fuckin’ hands…” 

You laughed and realized, very suddenly, how close you were to him. You weren’t sure the last time you’d been quite this close to him, the last time you could feel every line of him through his clothes, the last time his mouth had been that close to your own. Your heart sped up. His eyes searched yours and you could feel his breath on your skin and suddenly, you weren’t close enough to him. Not close enough at all. 

“Dad?” Sarah’s groggy voice called from the sliding glass door, making you jump, both of your heads turning toward her. Her face was scrunched and a curl had broken free of its braid, sticking straight out from the side of her head. “Is everything OK?” 

“Course it is, baby girl,” Joel frowned. “Why wouldn’t it be? What are you doin’ out of bed?”  

“You’re being loud,” she groaned. “You’re never loud.”  

“M’sorry kiddo,” Joel said, separating from you and working his way to the edge of the pool, pulling himself out of the water and dripping on the stone edge. “Gimme just a second to get Goldie out of the water before she freezes to death and dry her off, I’ll come tuck you in again in just a minute…” 

“Can I get another chapter?” She said it fast, the words all strung together, her eyes big. “Please? They just got into the arena and…” 

“We’ll see,” he said. “But only because it’s Friday and you’re sleeping over at Emma’s tomorrow so you won’t get one then. Inside, go on.” 

He watched her go and then went to the lounge chair at the side of the pool, getting the only towel he’d brought outside and holding it away from his body, spread open wide. 

“Hurry up, before I change my mind,” he said. 

“Such a gentleman,” you said, trying not to let your teeth chatter and trying to shove the ache that was still growing all hollow and wanting inside you down deep. You got out of the water and he wrapped you tightly in the towel, his arms going tightly around you. 

“Not really,” he said, pulling you back against his broad chest and squeezing you so the water from him soaked into the towel before he shook his shaggy curls over you so drops of water got all over your face as you laughed. “There, cured you of THAT notion…” 

“Thanks so much,” you said wryly as he released you. You turned to face him as he ran his fingers through his soaked hair and his shirt pulled up just enough that you caught a glimpse of the smooth flesh around his hips and you found yourself drifting closer to him again before you stopped yourself. Joel put his arms down and seemed to notice exactly where you were, just looking at you for a moment before he cleared his throat awkwardly. 

“I should go tuck Sarah back in,” he said. “Get into something dry so I don’t get her all soaked…” 

“Right,” you said, stepping back from him. “Sorry we woke your kid up because you just couldn’t leave well enough alone…” 

“I will throw your ass back in that pool,” he said, going to open the door for you. “Don’t try me.” 

“Oh don’t worry Miller,” you teased. “I know just what you’re capable of.” 

He started toward the stairs, a little trail of water in his wake as he went, and you watched the pull of the wet fabric of his shirt over his shoulders. You swallowed, hard.

“I’m just going to head out,” you said and he stopped, turning to frown at you. 

“You sure?” 

“Yeah,” you said. “Really should go wash this chlorine out of my hair. But see you tomorrow?” 

“With the list?” Joel asked. 

“With the list,” you answered. 

“Lookin’ forward to it,” he said, turning to go up the stairs again before looking back over his shoulder. “Drive safe, Goldie.” 

He didn’t wait for a response, just heading for his room. 

Your heart was still racing. 

You left the towel draped over the banister and just pulled on the oversized t-shirt you’d put in your bag before going to your car. 

You tried not to think about Joel as you drove home. 

It didn’t do you any good to think about him that way. It was Joel. He didn’t see you that way, drifting in that direction was what had ruined things so many years before. You’d just gotten him back, things were so good again, you felt like you belonged again, you couldn’t fuck that up, not because you’d never been able to move past a school girl crush. 

But you wanted to kiss him. Fuck, you wanted to kiss him. 

You tried not to think about kissing him. You tried not to think about what happened after the last time you’d kissed him. How quickly everything had dissolved, how you’d gone from picturing a future with Joel - a different one than you’d held in your mind outside of fantasy before - to running as far and as fast as you could in a matter of hours. 

It’s Goldie, he’d said then. It’s the worst thing that could happen, I wish it was anybody else…

You flinched at the memory, shoving it away. No, you didn’t think about that, not when you could help it. Just like you didn’t think about the way Joel’s lips felt against your skin, how his fingers - warm and think - had traced over you, how he made you feel so clearly seen and adored in a way that no one else had before, in a way your husband had never really seemed to. How he still made you feel that way. 

“Fuck,” you muttered to yourself as you parked, dropping your head to your steering wheel with a groan before you went in your house, closing your car door with a little too much force. 

You showered and forced yourself to keep your hands away from your aching slit. You were not going to fuck yourself in your bathroom to the idea of sleeping with your best friend. You weren’t. You weren’t a teenager anymore and you weren’t going to act like one. You were better than this.

Your hair was still damp when you gave up on getting any writing or grading done and went to bed, an almost frustrating, throbbing ache between your thighs. You stared at the ceiling in the dark for a while before you all but threw the covers off and rifled through your nightstand for the discreet little pink vibrator you’d bought years ago when you’d first figured out that, while your husband had many talents, making you come wasn’t one of them. 

You went to your usual fallback for porn but didn’t find anything that was really working for you, the ache of longing just getting worse as you gently toyed with your clit under the covers in the dark. Your cunt was slick, your wetness seeping down to your nightie and coating your fingers. It felt like forever that you’d been touching yourself and getting nowhere when the batteries on your vibrator died and you whimpered, kicking your legs down into your mattress in frustration. 

“Goddammit,” you moaned into your pillow, tossing your phone and vibrator aside, the ache in you worse than you’d ever really remembered it being before. There was no way you were going to be able to sleep like this, your whole body drawn tight and needy. You fumbled in your drawer for the charging cable and plugged the vibrator in before sighing and staring up at the ceiling again. 

Your thoughts drifted to Joel again. You couldn’t help it, he’d felt so good against you in the pool. He knew you so well, even after all this time. He kept your favorite snacks at his house and draped a blanket over you when you started getting cold when watching a movie. He was so funny and so handsome it hurt to look at him and he’d felt so fucking good.

Your fingers slipped between your legs again without really thinking about it, brushing against your swollen, sensitive clit. You resisted it for a moment, the idea of falling into the fantasy of you with Joel, but the need drawing everything inside you all tight and molten won. 

It swallowed you quickly once you gave in. 

The memory of him was there at the fore so fast, the way his lips had felt on you so many years ago. How you thought they’d feel against you now. His hands ranged over you, around your waist, down to your hips, his fingers twisting and knotting in the fabric there as he bunched it up to hold you firmer, reach you better. You moaned and rocked into your hand, sliding lower, your palm pressed against your sensitive nub as you slipped a finger inside yourself with a moan. You worked yourself open slowly, your slick making easy work of it, as you imagined it was his hand between your legs, his fingers sinking into you. How he’d take your swimsuit off and line his cock up with your entrance and push inside of you as he moaned your name. How his fingers would grip your flesh, prying at you as though he was trying to take you apart to keep pieces of you for himself. How he’d work himself so deep into you that you were certain no one else had ever come quite so close to climbing into another person’s skin before.  

You rocked your hips against your hand to the thought of him, not sure where memory ended and fantasy began, the fingers not plunging needily into your hole finding their way to your breast, grasping at the soft swell there, your own hand so unsatisfyingly small compared to his. You remembered the way his voice trembled as he breathed your name - his mouth against the tender skin at the base of your ear - as his cock filled you, the whole of him buried inside like he belonged there as he came. 

“Joel!” You gasped as your own orgasm hit, tight channel throbbing around the three fingers you’d managed to fit inside yourself, slick pooling in your palm and your tit filling your other hand. 

You came harder than you had in years, let alone from only using your hand and not your toy. It took you a few minutes to come down from the high of it, indulging in the fantasy of him in a way you hadn’t done since your freshman year of college. He last time you gave into it was back when you’d first started dating Gale but you’d felt so desperately alone, like no one had ever bothered to learn you at all. So you’d let yourself pretend that your best friend was still your best friend, that he loved you the way you loved him and that fucking you hadn’t been some mistake he’d made on prom night. It had seemed the most supreme extravagance, pretending that Joel would have wanted you to come like that with him. It still did. 

You put a stop to all that when Gale proposed, solidifying your relationship in an entirely new way. You tucked the memory of Joel and his body on and within yours away then. You’d never intended to think about him that way again. But then, you’d never intended to get divorced, either. 

“Fuck,” you sighed, shoving yourself out of bed to pee and clean up the mess you’d made of yourself. Before you lay back down, you opened the golden notebook on your bedside table and found the page with the list. You went to the bottom and tried to add another line but the pen in the elastic loop wouldn’t write. You groaned before fishing out the red pen you’d left in your nightstand from a night you were editing in bed from the top drawer. You added two words to the bottom of your list - trying to ignore the way the diamond of your engagement ring caught the light from your lamp, casting little rainbows on the paper - and circled them, pressing the pen into the paper harder than you really needed to. 

“There,” you said, capping the pen and dropping it on the notebook you hadn’t bothered to close. The pen rolled until it came to a stop, the red cap almost pointing to the newly added words as though they needed any more attention. 

That, you thought, was the solution. If you could just figure out how to accomplish that, you could put Joel back in that little box and keep this stupid crush from blowing up your whole life a second time, as long as you weren’t an idiot about it. 

You switched off the lamp and pulled your blankets tightly around yourself, trying to ignore the feeling that the words were glaring at you from their perch on your night stand. They blinked at you like neon behind your eyelids and you tried not to see them in the same way you tried not to think about Joel’s body on yours in the pool as you drifted off to sleep.

Get laid.

Next Chapter

A/N: I just adore these two. Honestly, they keep getting away from me, their conversations are so fun to write and explore that I get lost in what I'm trying to accomplish with a chapter. But that's OK! The ride is the point of this whole fic thing, right?

Thank you for being patient with this chapter! I got a bit sidetracked with another project but I think I'm in a good place to get back to my once a week updates here for a while. I hope it was at least somewhat worth the wait!

Thank you for being here! Love you!!

[forthegothicheroine]

Henchwomen Through the Ages

The "ages" of comics are not hard and fast things, and even comic book historians argue where they begin and end. They're more like moods than time periods, and your standard game of Henchwoman RPG will probably be set in a vague time period that could be anywhere from the thirties to today with an overall Silver Age mood. Still, let's take a look at how the roll of the Henchwoman has evolved, shall we?

Goldie is a gun-toting, cigar-chomping bank robber in victory rolls and a bullet bra. She's not called a henchwoman- she's called "Look out, that broad has a grenade!" She's loyal to the boss despite his dumb penny gimmick, but if he ever finked on her in court, he wouldn't live to see the sunrise. There's no Henchwomen's Union for her to join yet, but she's provided muscle for plenty of mob-backed unions. Goldie can't afford to be soft on heroes since they'd be just as happy to throw her off a roof as to arrest her, but she might be wooed by an appeal to patriotism- she ain't no Nazi rat! Her hobbies include matinee shows, swing dancing, and blasting coppers.

Sylvia is a competitive surfer and was a cocktail waitress until they fired her for slapping too many customers. Thanks to the newly formed Henchwomen's Union, she's treated much better by her current job, which usually involves crashing parties to steal themed jewelry. She and the heroes she fights have an understanding- they'll never be rough with her, and she won't check up on them after putting them in a death trap to see if they've died. On her off hours, she can go dancing in the same outfit she worked in- a silver jumpsuit, gogo boots and a purely decorative motorcycle helmet.

Brawny is a member of the Sisterhood of Wicked Witches, and she fights for a cause- or rather, several causes. These range from the reasonable (Save the whales!) to the less reasonable (A free ray gun for every child!) The Henchwomen's Union is strong enough to get her good pay, so many of her problems are philosophical- is she a good guy or a bad guy, and what do good and bad even mean? Brawny has to be a bit more careful than she would have been ten years ago, since death may well stick- but that also means she might really kill a hero, at least for a while, and that's what matters!

Tenebra prefers to be called a Dark Muse, a member of a vampire circle dedicated to bringing art to life, painted in colors of blood. Her eyeliner is swirly and her gowns are velvet, and she wears them onstage in her sideline darkwave band. Tenebra arranges her crimes in accordance with pre-raphaelite imagery, with victims displayed in heartbreakingly beautiful and mythologically-influenced poses. Her boss may technically be the Queen of the Vampires, and she may have a card with the Henchwomen's Union, but her true loyalty is to art itself.

Ferra is a mercenary with a separate pouch for each type of bullet, and she has a lot of types of bullet. Her stilettos are tall but her hair is taller, and she can strike intimidating poses that would break a normal person's back. The Henchwomen's Union had its own back broken by the bosses, and is now more of informal underground thing, but it still hooks her up with real deal bad guys. She'll kill without a second thought for her boss, but she's only one bad day away from turning her gun on him. It might even happen accidentally, since he and the heroes dress exactly the same. Ferra somehow has a heavy metal soundtrack even when there's no music playing.

Ally got a degree in psychology but until she can afford grad school, she gigs as a henchwoman. Her bosses are sillicon valley dickheads, but the first one to offer her real benefits will have her loyalty for life. Thanks to the resurgence of the Henchwomen's Union, Ally gets to wear big stompy boots instead of high heels, but she still has to wear a big day-glo logo on her leather jacket that might as well be a target sign. Her hobbies include pop culture conventions, smoking weed and credit card fraud.

[m4sonn]

The outsiders, Aftermath AU (no deaths)

(Thanks to my friend @peachyponyboyy whom I collaborated w/for this and probably will collaborate with for any future works like this)

Basically what would happen after the book/movie, also if johhny and dally didn’t die

Ponyboy: Gets a scholarship into UCLA for literature, When he's finished with college he gets his masters degree and becomes a professor at UCLA.

Sodapop + Steve: (NOT THE 'NAM!!!) Soda and Steve get together, both working as mechanics at the DX, they live in the old curtis brothers house when everyone left, the gang only coming back on holidays to visit steve and soda. Soda would later propose to Steve at a nice restaurant, inviting the rest of the gang to see. (Spoiler alert: the entire gang bawled. Absolutely WEEPED, happy tears ofc) they couldn’t get married legally since it was the 60s but they had a nice little ceremony somewhere nice for the gang. They would later adopt a little red head after finding her on the streets.

Darry: Would move out to give Soda and Steve space. Living in the house across from the two, would settle with a wife and kids, Having a special room just for Ponyboy when he visits from college, His family would always cook the turkey during thanksgiving. Would definitely remodel the house.

Dally: would still be a delinquent, fs. Would sleep in his car if he's not already crashing at soda and Steve's place. He appears every now and then, and definitely joined some weird gang with like 13-15 year olds. NOT aloud near darry's kids without adult supervision, too much of a bad influence. He also says he doesn’t like kids so he would probably end up punching them

Johnny: all the way dating Ponyboy, got into UCLA by dumb luck. Nobody even knows how he got in. He kinda just did, def got into a psychology major so he could help other people like the help he needed when he was a kid/teen. Ponyboy and Johnny live in a decent sized apartment near the university. Definitely don't have kids but have a Golden retriever (goldie, named after the poem nothing gold can stay) and a black cat (windrixville, after the town they hid out at.)

Two-Bit: Still has an obsession with Mickey Mouse, probably lives in an RV parked in the vacant lot near the gang's house. Adopts a mouse he found off the street, probably has diseases but it's ok. Named it Mickey, now searching for his Minnie. Probably sells tobacco to kids and teens out of his RV, somehow hasn't gotten caught yet.

[frenchiefitzhere]

*highlighting every guest VA I've ever had on my channel* (and hoping to high heaven I don't forget someone) Series: Corollary

1. The OG guest VA: @teafairywithabook as Doctor Marigold "Goldie" Fletcher First Appearance: Episode 6 - The Reigning Queen of the Port Greene Historical Society 2. Ghostly as The Cashier in Episode 16 - Don't fall in with the wrong sort 3. @sweetnothingproductions as Nariah First Appearance: Episode 19 - Wrath 4. @thatlesbeanjew as Lori Bach (a.k.a. My TV Wife) First Appearance: Episode 23 - The unvarnished truth 5. @penncilkid as Avery Rush First Appearance: Episode 25 - Clarity 6. Honk as The Eminence First Appearance: Episode 31 - It will be over 7. @mr-laveau as The Medic in Episode 33 - Pancakes 8. @alexrayva as Penemue in Episode 36 - A bad influence ...and more to come!

Series: Ruby the Dragon Queen

@tepid-judas as The Magic Mirror First Appearance: Magic Lesson and Cuddles with a Yandere She-Dragon

@sweetnothingproductions as Appoline First Appearance: Flying with Your Dragon Queen to a Palace in the Clouds

@starlitangels as Flora Rowe First Appearance: Flying with Your Dragon Queen to a Palace in the Clouds

@alexrayva as Peregrine Rowe in Returning a Thankful Villager to Her Family

@chaotic-spaghetti-cowboy as Cyrus in Discovering a Seelie Princess

DadeAudio as "Grey" in Meeting Your Dragon-In-Law

CiceroSays as Tony in Entering The Dragon Lady's Lair [Mob Boss AU]

NoraASMR as Acamar in Seeking Wisdom from an Enigmatic Centaur

Series: The Waking Nightmare Series

This is my newest series, with only one featured guest so far: Mister @escapedaudios

(If I somehow forgot someone 😭, please just DM me and I will make the BIGGEST deal about recognizing you in a separate post! 🌻 I didn't include people who've done music collabs with me since that's a different kind of thing, but hey, that's not a bad idea! And I also plan to do a little tumbly post about all the amazing artists who have made thumbnail & promo art for me because they deserve that recognition too!) p.s. this is the part where I sneak in an announcement that I'm planning a new series for with a big ensemble cast, hoping to start this summer

[cybervesna]

If Wiosna's ascendancy wasn't so controlling of her future, she would be a happy traditional ballerina like her babcia 🥺 [Message template by @luvwich] Yesterday while thinking of President AU with Kurt and Wiosna, my mind jumped way further to "What if NUSA won the Unification War?" Long story short, NUSA got the Night City (and the rest of the states), Kurt became a war hero and General in the Pentagon; Rosalind and Kurt still are in a secret relationship; Wiosna wasn't neglected and her grandma raised her, she never became a netrunner, and wasn't forced to study, instead she is worldwide known traditional ballerina. Traditional ballet - In my headcanon it's the form of ballet strictly performed by people without any body cyberware (Only personal slot and Kiroshi are allowed for function in society). Technically, General Hansen is a single guy, so Wiosna hits on him 🤭 Longer AU explanation/context that I wrote on Discord under the cut, lol sorry if it's messy

Hear me out

AU where time traveler moved a chair and NUSA did won Unification War, and Wiosna grew up well. Colonel Hansen is now 4-star General Hansen with position in pentagon. Buuuuuuut, he is still in a secret relationship with President Myers. At the time of 2076 it's already 12 years of dating in secret, they should be married already! So of course he's super frustrated relationship wise.

Wiosna is a worldwide recognized ballet dancer and a prima ballerina of her grandmother's ballet company. She never became a netrunner, and never studied psychology, but she is 100% organic at the peak of her dancing career. Wiosna is also rumored to soon join the LoveSky SMC board as a part of her grooming process to take over later. Basically, in this scenario her position is what she is running away from in the main AU. She is a Goldenbaby with power capable of influencing countries.

Now get this. Some bougie party for rich and powerful. Rosie is there of course, General Hansen is there as well. And there's a ballet play starring an international star. The same star happened to have a grandfather with influence over space, so after play, she also takes part in the more closed section of the party. That's where a guy looking like a tank of a man catches her attention and she hits on him. Of course it's our Kurtie! Who is more than interested, and maight been a bit clumsy about it in front of everyone. No one would cared tbh, except Rosie, of course. Someone was hitting on her man. And that someone wasn't just any other gal.

Kurt couldn't just say no to Wiosna. Mostly because of who she was, but also because she was much much younger attractive woman, who wasn't scared to publicly show that she's interested in him. He was flattered. His ego got stroked. But nothing beside talk didn't happen between them. They exchanged numbers tho.

So later, when Kurt and Rosie got back home, Ros of course is a bit angry, and jealous.

Rosie: So, did you enjoy your company tonight? Kurt: Miss Kochanowska is a… really lovely lady. Rosie: She is young enough to be our daughter, Kurt. Kurt: Too bad you keep me behind closed doors, 'cause maybe then we would have one, and I would look at it differently. Anyway, you have nothing to worry about. She's a Goldie, and most likely forgot about me already.

[sentimuse]

Ever After High X Twisted Wonderland.

I was high when I made this please forgive the babble. I needed it to be said.

OKay so arguably the TWSTverse goes the best with the EAHverse. I may rant about Descendants later but lemme get this out first via Headcanon.

Riddle Rosehearts:

Pre OB! Royal Post OB! Rebel

The hedgehogs get along.

He and Lizzie have an odd relationship. They both have mommy issues but they both want to live up to their mothers' standards. Riddle has a hyperfixation for her mom and a deep seeded pride regarding her, that gets strained when he and Lizzie commiserate about shitty moms. Lizzie feels weird cuz he's nice but he idolizes her mom and that's awkward when you both have bad moms you still love in a strained almost begrudging way. They're good friends but don't seem like it due to the awkwardness of it all

He really gets along with Kitty and Maddie. Strangely Maddie is the one that reminds him of Che'Nya (Kitty does too because duh but personality wise). Always talking in riddles and rhymes but still a very good friend.

Gets introduced to Ginger via Trey and has to fight himself internally to not fucking ask for a strawberry tart from her. He's genuinely curious as to what it tastes like but knows that Trey would grill his ass into knowing which one was better and would face Dorm Card Trey Consequences. 

Trey Clover:

Rebel and always has been.

He's great friends with Lizzie due to her being kinda just a tamer Riddle.

Friends with Kitty and Maddie as well.

Has had baking contests with Ginger. (Friendly? maybe.)

Midkey respects Daring for having that pearly white of teeth. He's a little jealous, but Trey has the leg up because Daring is kinda vapid.

Is weirdly close with Mad Hatter cuz Trey is always able to concoct whatever weird flavor he's asked for.

Cater Diamond:

He's a Rebel 4lifer

He and Goldie are fucking ride or die besties. Swapping influencer tips? Yes. I bet they even got matching endorsements.

Him and Maddie are besties but not as much. He likes how bubbly she is.

Cater also really gets along with Briar and they're able to connect a little about insecurities and socializing stress.

Cater would fucking love it here everything is so aesthetic and his Magicam would blow tf up plus he's so girlie pop I don't think the transition would be that hard for him. He fits in really well.

Deuce Spade:

Rebel 

NGL him and Ace also fit into EAH really well they're good people (most of the time) and their flaws are light hearted enough to survive transplanting. Deuce is just a lil ditzy and has some anger issues but really loves his mom and baby chickens??? Just a little guy energy.

He would get along well with Cerise imo. Their vibes are similar to me, that is the best explanation I have.

Probably has a crush on Raven he also relates somewhat to the bad past but wants to be good things.

Ace Trappola:

Rebel

Ace is a shitter. Fucking asshole goofster. But he has a pretty decent head on his shoulders.

Really gets along with Kitty being two shitsers.

Strangely good friends with Lizzie. I mean if you're gonna rule at least be fair yeah?

Epel Felmier:

Rebel

He's absolute BESTIES with Darling. Because they're both feminine and want to break out of what life has assigned them. 

He's also pretty tight with Cedar.

Wants to be friends with Ramona so so so so so fucking bad.

Vil Schoenheit:

I hate to say it but my man is a centrist.

He understands and respects the audacity the royals have to think they can force others into roles they aren't meant for. However that's kinda his whole fucking issue in life. He doesn't mind some of the Royals, Apple is certainly more bearable than Neige and I'm certain that Vil can see right through her.

Sympathizes with Apple honestly. He'd want to like this Evil Queen and has pointed out her good points like being strong at magic and a good manipulator but also she's kinda a bitch so womp womp.

Totally gets along with Raven he's like the midpoint between the two.

Is very annoyed by Goldie.

Hangs out with Cupid and Rook sometimes. 

Good friends with and commiserates with Duchess.

Rook Hunt:

Rebel ofc bb

Bro if so girly pop and hangs out with Cupid. They go on about pretty things and love together. He and Vil encourage her to go after Dexter.

He's aloof enough to fit into the EAH verse.

Does his rounds with the cast susing them out. Has the Leona infatuation with Ramona. 

Isn't fond of Goldie she's too keen to pry into his life.

Idia Shroud:

Is a Doomer Royal with Rebel sentiments.

Bro is maybe too sad for EAH but the books are a lil kwazy soo…

He hangs out with the gamer boys sometimes like Humphrey and Dexter if he has to socialize.

Would rather hang with Ortho but Ortho is hanging out with Cedar.

Fucking hates it here.

Ortho Shroud:

Bro fucking LOVES it here. Absolute Rebel.

He and Cedar are FAST FAST friends for being non human humans.

Loves hanging with Maddie and the girls.

Probably has like a shitpost Snap/Insta with the wackiest fucking pictures of himself, Cedar. Briar, Raven and Maddie. Like drunk college kid shit, tiddlywinks and necromancy.

Is everyone's little brother and he fucking THRIVES being able to be an enabled little shitter. No clue who helped Kitty and Ace with their latest prank. Couldn't be sweet Ortho! He's just a little guy!

Azul Ashengrotto:

Considered a neutral student for business, but is very much a pragmatist about it whatever the fuck that means lmao. He's a Rebel

Is both sad and relieved there aren't more eels.

He and Hopper are besties tho.

Suave cool guys sometimes and fucking trainwrecks otherwise? Kinnies even

Becomes lowkey midkey hydrophobic upon learning Meeshell turns fishy when wet.

Jade and Floyd:

Both Rebels ofc

Floyd and Jade are living it tf up.

Jade is investigating new mushrooms

Floyd is fucking shit up everywhere he goes and teaching them basketball or learning their basketball.

OFC Floyd has the nicknames on DECK

Maddie likes Floyd's silly nicknames and isn't so fond of him being mean sometimes.

She's also like mildly scared of Jade but he's nice to her dad and they talk about mushroom tea and treats so he's okay in her book.

Floyd always be racing Ramona or Cerise or doing some dumb shit with Briar.

Jade does his girlboss info gathering like in the one vignette with Vil where he looks so pathetically malewife.

Cedar is kept very very far from them.

Jamil Viper:

Rebel and honestly most of them are.

Surprisingly hangs out with Justine and Duchess. 

They be dancing N shit y'know.

Surprisingly gets along with Ashlynn.

Hangs out with Duchess when she gets fed up with Leona.

They vent about Kalim and Princess.

Kalim Al-Asim

Rebel but is so bubbly and sympathetic he's almost a centrist.

Kalim is so sweet he'd be like "Yeah Apple I totally get you wanna be queen and stuff but it makes Raven sad. :((("

Man is living it UP per usual.

He's hanging with every single person he can.

Absolute besties with Briar and Melody.

He's such a ball of sunshine.

He'd be so fucking happy here.

Leona Kingscholar:

Rebel ofc and would be a lot more dramatic about it than Raven is/was.

She ripped the page out of the Book of Legends? Bestie Leona would've dusted the whole thing like Azul's contracts. 👀 👀

Okay that's exaggerating he would've done the same thing.. Maybe

Honestly jokes aside he'd be more akin to Idia. A doomer rebel. 

He bothers tf out of Duchess and they're actually good friends.

Her drive to succeed kinda invigorates him.

Honestly bro is the same as ever. He eeps, he eats, he makes Ruggie do shit. 

SIKE!!!

Leona in the EAHverse would come to be like a god-tier version of himself. It would force his character development into being better than Falena imo. Yeah you could look at him and say he's just laze around, but in the middle of not only a class, but a life threatening conflict that is so deeply entwined with his actual life? If you ask me a PostOB! Leona would be all OVER this shit. He would be making full on plans and figuring shit out like well…a king. *laugh track*

Maybe then he'd like leave Ruggie alone or have a heart to heart with Ruggie or some cool emotionally mature shit. 

Ruggie Bucchi:

So audaciously a Rebel.

He hangs a lot with Maddie and Ashlynn.

Rosabella is also very nice to him. They're like sibs imo. She tells him to be nicer he tells her she's short or smthn and gives her backbone a boost.

Ruggie with a more developed Leona and with something solid to stand for would be a force to be reckoned with ngl. Even tho I think Ruggie has the weird trauma impulse that he has to earn his keep or earn others love for him so while I think Leona would be nicer to Ruggie part of that kindness is the unspoken way Leona lets Ruggie "steal" from him or do his laundry or whatever to feel like he has "earned" that money or food when those are just things people should do for you or do their best to provide for you because you exist and you are loved and cared for.

Anyway I just think we'd get a softer and a bit less cynical Ruggie. Not less crafty tho.

Jack Howl:

Rebel obvi.

Absolute besties with the Wolf sisters.

They do wolf things together.

Honestly I don't think much would change for him.

He'd be with the Savannaclaw boys being huge Rebel activists because of course they are. <3

Malleus Draconia:

Conflicted but ultimately a Rebel. Understands that people have things they need to do but they should be afforded the choice if possible.

HUGE HUGE BESTIES with Raven. Goth Girlies Unite!!!

Being around Raven and Maddie alot does WONDERS with him being more social and approachable. Maddie is their "cute item"

Hangs out with Cupid a lot after hearing about an old Gargoyle friend she had and REALLY wants to go to Monster High and meet her.

Fucking hates Faybelle. Thinks it's uncouth to crash parties.

Gets so so sad just looking or thinking about Briar.

They're mega besties tho and he like apologizes several times over even though it wasn't his Thorn Fairy that caused this. Immortality sucks dick.

She tells him to chill and shows him how to work a phone. /hj

They cry into ice cream and go on adventures a lot.

Lilia Vanrouge:

Rebel silly

Bro loves it here. The people are so spookable and he's just a cute little guy y'know!

He dispenses his wisdom and has an official ban from all kitchens so decreed by a combined front of (everyone) but mostly Ginger, Trey, and the Crumbs.

Hangs out mostly gaming but also with Poppy!

Poppy does his hair all the time, mostly via magic for funsies.

Also hangs with Kitty and Courtly.

Silver:

Rebel (He's his father's son)

Fits in so well. Really looks like one of the Charmings.

Hangs out mostly with Darling and Chase.

He has a one sided blood feud with both Hunter and Apple.

He's so princely and he's surrounded by birds and is in nature all the time??

Apple thinks he's coming for her place being so pretty when sleeping and surrounded by forest animals and flowers?? C'mon man wtf??

Hunter thinks he's coming for his girlfriend because Silver was nice to/talked to Ashlynn ONCE.

Bro can't catch a break from Briar either. She's the opp of his sleepiness. 

Sebek Zigvolt:

Sebek would be whatever Malleus is because loyalty. He is in all honesty so truly deeply conflicted.

All he wants to do is be a good knight for Malleus. He has wanted this forever. It's like his destiny. But then again he kinda (maybe? Idk I haven't read chapter 7 anything) got to choose this. But he should be loyal to whatever it is Malleus chooses, but what if in this world the book chose some STRANGER to be Malleus' knight and not him? AND THEN WHAT IF

In short he's very likely a Rebel he's just gotta get their. 

Crisis of Identity part 2 aka (I've conquered my internalized racism at being part human but now I'm not sure who I am personality and morality wise. What a conundrum! The Musical The Series The Musical.)

He hangs out with Darling and Chase as well.

Is also pretty close with Cerise and Raven.

All in all things would go pretty well together not that ANY of what I said explains that, but in long:

EAH is based on the idea of Destiny v.s Free Will and talks about the deep seeded fears and problems that would come from a society that tells you you must be one thing your whole life when you want to be another. Which goes very well with how the Overblots happen. 

Riddle is pressured and abused by his mother to be a perfect star child and that pressure is too much for him and he snaps. 

Leona is always considered second best and less than his brother. 

Azul has a poorly written (imo) overblot but he wants to feel comfortable in his own skin and feels he needs to do so by being in total control of every situation so he can look good and not feel inferior, as he was bullied in his childhood.

Jamil has to downplay himself to make Kalim look better and is made to live a life where he can never be his true self. 

Vil also has a poorly written overblot (imo) but he wants to feel loved and appreciated and to not be the villain he's always casted as. (Literally Raven's ENTIRE thing)

Idia wants to be a hero, and cope with the guilt of feeling like he killed his brother.

Malleus is grappling with mortality and not having a "proper" family. (Briar does the first half of this in the show)

EAH also does bend and change these "destinies"

Darling being Apple's "Prince"

Daring being with Rosabella when he was certain he'd be with Apple.

In the books, Cedar coming to terms with "being human" without having to be made of physical flesh and bone or being actually human. Thus disregarding the need for her story. 

Apple being the more ruthless between her and Raven when she is supposed to be kind and sweet.

Red and Big Bad being together.

In the books again, Brooke interacting with the story. 

So in long with shit for details and no real argument. I think Ever After High and TWST would make a great crossover and maybe I just want more people to do more idk modern(??) things with EAH. But also I'm a sucker for X but a Highschool/College thing.

[lettheladylead]

I see you're not the only one who noticed this, but nevertheless, why is Beakley so fiercely protective of Scrooge from unwanted persons, and why is Goldie a special person for her in this regard?

i dont really think beakley wants to protect scrooge from goldie, i think she wants to protect webby from goldie

beakley spent a loooong time working for SHUSH and theres always gonna be a part of SHUSH that associates criminal behavior with FOWL. beakley probably doesnt really think goldie works for FOWL, but she also doesnt know for sure and theres no point in taking that risk

outside of that, goldie would just be a bad influence on webby. the less time that goldie spends around scrooge, the less webby knows about her, the better. if scrooge wants to make bad decisions, thats on him, hes an adult who can make those choics. but webbys just a kiddo

i also think goldie did something specifically bad to beakley at some point between 1960 and 2017. dont know what, but beakley's hatred seems very personal

[clangenrising]

Anon from before talking about how my opinion of goldie soured for a bit! (im gonna start marking my anons with something so i dont have to do this every time lol)

Yeah no i wasn’t saying it should be written differently or anything! You write really well and your characters are extremely believable. Its good writing! I was mostly just voicing my opinions for discussions sake, like how I would in comments on deviantART or comicfury or something. That’s the same for every time I make a comment about something the characters did- I know it’s hard to discern tone or intent over the internet though 😔 boils down to “fantastic writing, i want to put goldie and scorch in a jar and rattle them around for a bit”

Unfortunately Goldie can be a pushover when it comes to Scorch, and with the way Scorch treats people it creates a pretty unhealthy dynamic in regards to conflict like this. I sympathize with how Scorch’s life has been Shitty Bad and Awful™️ but I really really think she needs to work on herself before she actually engages in any sort of serious romantic relationship.

And again I don’t necessarily think Goldie and Scorch should be banned from mushy behavior in front of Yarrowshade (they basically live in the same house so that would be hard lol) it was just Scorch’s attitude towards him and then her turning around and acting like that with Goldenstar that made me mad. It was just evidence she was being petty for petty’s sake instead of actually being hurt or upset. Pretty worried about what kind of values she’s going to instill in her apprentice tbh!!!

Again fantastic writing A+++. People are messy and I like how you write that!! I actually have notifs on for this blog and I usually drop everything to check it when a new post shows up!

-🍡 (this works as good as anything I guess 😂)

Hey, thanks for reaching out again. Definitely didn't mean to imply I thought you were trying to say I should write differently although I totally see how my response came off that way. My bad!

I'm glad you want to engage in discussion about my characters cause I LOVE engaging in that too!

And yeah, Scorch probably shouldn't be in a relationship right now. Sadly it's very common for people to enter relationships when they aren't ready for it. Hopefully Goldie is a bigger influence on her than she is on Goldie. Also, well noted, it is going to be interesting to see what kind of influence Scorch has on Fogpaw.

Something I do want to point out is that between Scorch making Yarrowshade apologize and she and Goldie being all mushy, there is an unspecified amount of time where Yarrowshade tells a funny story and the cats talk and joke and walk. I feel like that makes it slightly less insensitive. But yeah, you're right. Scorch is being petty and she knows it. She thinks as much in the piece where she's taken away, acknowledging that what she wants - to be chosen every time no matter what - is selfish and unreasonable. Not to excuse the behavior of course, just wanting to discuss it, like you said ^w^

[aaandbackstabbed]

Louie: I have a solution

Dewey: oh thank goodness

Louie: it involves fire

Huey: oh absolutely not

Scrooge: you’ve been spending way too much time with Goldie

[flashistired]

Here’s some random HCs I thought up for Team Friendship and Death

Puss has a significantly larger number of friends than most of his closest peers know about. There are many, many people in the world who know him personally, but never really see him because he’s always out on adventures.

Through sheer commitment and determination, Perrito has learned how to make flower crowns and gives one to everyone he meets.

Kitty and Perrito take turns doing Puss’s eyeliner whenever he doesn’t feel like doing it himself.

Puss has only cried three times in his life. The day after abandoning Humpty, the day he abandoned his name after encountering Death, and the day he faced Death in the crater of the Wishing Star.

Puss still does wonder what would have happened if he wished back his lives. Knowing what he knows now and having the life he has, he’s always been curious to see if anything would have changed after his battle with Death.

Kitty has multiple lives, but only 7 instead of 9. She prefers not to talk about how she lost her first two, but judging by the story she told Puss in the first movie, he has come to his own conclusion.

Puss, despite being a cat, loves the rain. Kitty and Perrito will often catch him sitting outside in it alone, meditating or just watching it fall.

Puss is Bi, Kitty is Pan.

Puss and Kitty both own self-made necklaces of golden eggs to honor Humpty’s memory. They’ll tell Perrito about him sometimes.

Perrito, sheerly through complete curiosity, has met and associated himself with multiple royal officials and high-ranking knights across Spain to the point of Puss and Kitty’s names being constantly brought up in recruitment-based conversations. Because of this, they usually let Perrito do the talking during important meetings and things of that nature.

Kitty’s “spiritual retreat” that Goldilocks mentioned in The Last Wish is pertaining to what happened to her immediately after Puss left her at the altar. On that retreat, she tried to dissociate from Puss’s legacy and name completely, accidentally running into Goldi and confining in her because of what happened, and even Shrek at one point and wondering how Puss makes such odd friends.

Because of Puss and Kitty’s accidental influence, Perrito also wears eyeliner now.

Death, being well, Death, knows an angel who completely opposes his job and world view. While they have no bad blood, they’re constantly at odds with each other, with Death ending lives that have met their due date and this angel fighting to rebirth them into someone new altogether. This angel isn’t Life, either. Just an angel.

This is all I have for now lol

[lonely-cereal]

Random Post Canon AU idea - TPN kids starting a rock band

After they arrive in the human world, the kids can discover more genres of music. Out of all the kids the one who's the most serious about music and takes up several instruments is Ray. Come on guys, Shirai said himself ray bad a secret deep appreciation for music. I think he'd be super influenced by rock music and stuff.

Another person who gets really into music is Emma. I imagine she uses it to cope with memory loss. Shirai said she can sing well.

Violet and Don also like music a lot in my head.

After finding Emma in the human world, they all end up talking one day about what music they like and instruments.

Ray has never really been a fancy business dude like Norman with his business,he'd rather do something more artistic, so when Don jokingly brings up the idea of them starting a band, he's immediately on board. Emma gets in on it, and Violet or one of the Goldy Pond kids do as well. (Sorry but Norman has a Business and he's probably tone deaf)

They get together and form a band, and after releasing an album the group gets super popular in the human world, bringing more light to the Cattle Kids interested in the arts.

[imsosocold]

Ace Attorney characters that I think are related

In addition to my “ Godot is Manfred’s other child” agenda.

Richard Wellington and Frank Sawhit:

My favorite pack of thieves. I like to think Frank was stealing in order to earn enough for him and his son to survive. And then Richard was trying to get enough money to bail his father out of prison but once learning who the defense attorney would be for Maggey decided to try to avenge his father. I want them to have a tearful reunion in prison and then escape together to rob more rich people <3.

Furio Tigre and Wocky Kitaki:

Have you seen the last names?!! In all seriousness I think them being related would make the overall crime scene more fleshed out and make its story more cohesive. The Cadaverni rage wouldn’t be over a member getting in an accident with just some thug, but a member of a mob, a rival to power in “Los Angeles”. Though I don’t think Tigre would be considered a legitimate member of the family by the Kitaki line themselves, I think Wocky would look up to Furio as an older brother figure and base his persona around him. Wocky’s aggression to Phoenix is less funny now though.

Polly Jenkins and Goldy Gerwitz:

Imagine the only person who ever cared for you took their own life and you lost everything and now all you have left to turn to is material items. But then coincidentally you come across those who indirectly lead to her suicide but you are too scared do anything and you regret for the rest of your life for your inaction. Just fun with the bois over here.

Herman Crab and Larry:

A STEM and artist duo returns, this time as brothers! It’s the most romance repulsed aromantic against the world’s strongest romanticist ( but Larry is also aro spec, I can feel it in bones). Neither of them can ever have a normal last name and Larry only took his mother’s in order to avoid people making jokes about him having crabs (* cries in the pain of bad nicknames*). In all seriousness , both Larry and Herman are incredibly talented, noble people who will ride and die for those they care about. While Herman would be annoyed by his much younger brother’s antics, he’d still genuinely care for and look out for him. And Larry naturally would be down to help his older brother with any of his schemes.

Simon Blackquill and Daryan:

My favorite black and white animal themed mysterious, dramatic men. I think them being related would tie the Apollo Justice series' events and characters more closely together and give much needed characterization to Daryan ( yet one of many aspects of wasted potential in the Apollo Justice series). Daryan becoming a detective because he doesn't believe Simon could do such heinous acts in a mirror to Klavier and Athena, him trying to gain whatever influence and power and wealth he can which could potentially aid his family. Daryan agreeing to smuggle the cocoons both because he genuinely wants to save people like Simon did, laws be damned, but because being in the good graces of such a high ranking official, in addition to the large sums of money he'd gain in return, could be what saves his relative. The reveal of this plan would hold so much more immediate consequences and affect a wider reach of characters. And Simon, trying so hard to help and protect all those he cares about all on his own, with Daryan being a reminder how damaging that mentality can be and that no matter how hard the both of them try they can't save everyone!!!!

Also yes, Daryan keeps the hair for Simon's sake, who styled it that way as a prank.

Tyrell Badd and Luke Atmey:

Luke wanting nothing else than to be just like his cool, smart, popular father but feeling like he can't properly emulate him on his own, so he lies and cheats to attempt to do so in turn becoming everything his father is against and hates.

Also Luke feeling like his father prefers Kay over him BYE-

Payne and Geiru:

Imagine following in your ancestors' footsteps to join the law system in order to bring ‘pain’ upon evil doers but one of your family members decides to fuck that and runs off to become a rakugo artist of all things. And then you find out years later that they had a child who committed murder in their name and you didn't even get to come across her in court. Poor Payne can't ever catch a break.

Ron and Joe Darke:

The worst father and son duo who commit crimes and escalate situations because they have terrible problem solving skills yet despite that cannot be convicted for the life of them, the former only happening with false evidence. But the main reason I like this idea is because it means Ron took his wife's last name "DeLite" since she is the light of his life and now he isn't in the 'dark' anymore.

Boo all you want.

Jinxie Tenma and Uendo Toneido:

Two of the best ( and underrated) Ace Attorney characters in addition to being great mental health representation! I think they'd have great chemistry and interactions as siblings. Also Uendo deserves a wrestler father who can beat shit out of ableist fucks and law enforcement. <3

Gumshoe and Dogen:

Such a slut for the idea of Gumshoe wanting to tear himself away from the family name and to do good by saving lives instead of ending them yet working in an incredibly deadly, corrupt system that goes against his ideals and desires.

Also Dick's still definitely hurt that Dogen seems to care more about Simon Keyes than him >:)

Constance Courte and Sebastian:

" Uh, if Constance Courte was Sebastian's mom, wouldn't Blaise had make her disappear-"

Bitch, he tried. That loser husband had to back down.

Unfortunately, Constance wasn't able to take her son with her and decided to throw herself even more into her teaching of law, her indirect way of fighting her husband and preventing people from becoming like him. I like to think she got to reunite with her son again after Blaise was finally arrested and Sebastian continued his prosecuting career in her honor.

Anyway Constance Courte is cool and deserved more screentime ( and to be written into a better case lmao).

Cody Hackins and the Fey clan:

I just want more perspective on the Fey family from those AMAB, I can't believe the main AA trilogy went into Kurain Village and the Fey Clan and didn't expand on this. Anyway, Cody's lack of spiritual power, supposedly due to his sex, in addition to losing his mother led to him and his father being discarded from the main clan and looked down upon. Refusing to accept the position of a branch family given to him, Cody's father took the two of them away from the village. While initially having trouble adjusting to such a drastic change in lifestyle and environment, the two of them were overall happier. Cody still faintly remembers Mia and Maya as some of the few people in the village that were kind to him and is unable to accept Mia's death, believing she and Maya "fused powers" and simply cohabit a body now. On a happier note, Steel Samurai is both Cody and his father's comfort show and they and the Fey Sisters ( and eventually Pearl) watch it together.

The Von Karma and the Justice family:

Okay, with names like those, centered around concepts considered essential to the judicial system, they have be to be connected somehow in this series. Whether they're distantly related or rival families or what, both family lines and their influences absolutely permeate the series.

Also 100% the reason Kristoph took Apollo in as his mentee was to spite the Von Karmas.

Lauren Paups and Matt Engarde:

Polar opposite (half) siblings: Lauren is shy while Matt is outgoing, Lauren has low self esteem while Matt thinks highly of himself, Lauren’s a dreamer and romanticist while Matt’s cruelly aware of how the world works, Lauren’s wishy washy and easily swayed while Matt’s is rooted in his ideas and beliefs, Lauren can’t hide feelings or thoughts while Matt constantly wears a mask, yet their most prominent trait, the one that they share, is that they’ll do anything for who or what they believe in. Also they both share self destructive tendencies when seemingly stressed (Matt scratching and Lauren cutting up pieces of their hair) in addition to being heavily dramatic. Unfortunately, I don’t think they ever got the chance to properly know each other but nonetheless the duo would be close ( as much as they’re allowed to be anyway).

Also this beta design for Lauren is Matt Pre- T and you can’t convince me otherwise.

Give me your relationship hcs, I love to hear the brainworms from other people and have them play with my maggots <3

[chidoroki]

182 Days of TPN - Day 95

Chapter 95: “Let’s Go Home”

Oliver is essentially the male-version of Emma with his view of Goldy Pond very similar to what she believed of Grace Field and the demon world itself.

We love a supportive parent, even if their kids wish for destruction. And aww the trio are so small and adorable. I’d love a story just about them and their several years spent at Goldy Pond. Hell, there needs to be more content of the GP trio in general. I’ll take literally anything.

Not to discredit Nigel and Violet, but it would be so much work for two people to watch over and guide 50+ kids, even with Lucas going with them.

Catch me crying over how sweet Oliver is. Also, that tiny flashback of Lucas being confused about Adam is cute. That kid certainly has a lot of questions surrounding him.

Y’all are just a bunch of self-sacrificial idiots and I love it. Ray could get along with them so well. I’d die to see him interact with the whole crew too.

Lucas once again being such a great dad by owning up to his mistakes (though I don’t think this one was even that bad since he was also suffering) and refusing to leave any of the children behind. I usually see people wish about how entertaining it could’ve been if Isabella met Yuugo, but Lucas is the real parent she needs to chat with. She could learn a thing or two from him.

Look how much my boy has grown! From not wanting to escape GF with the younger children simply because they were too young to understand and were bound to be a huge burden outside the wall, to now refusing to give up on anyone, no matter their age, potential, or how injured they are. Emma’s influence is so strong.

I wanna thank these kids for being so kind and ready to help out, but I also feel the need to apologize to them because aside from Theo, I remember none of their names. Wonderful additions to the family regardless!

Oh, I gotta say sorry to Adam as well because I forgot he was still around.. he’ll definitely be a big help during the long trip back.

Next on my list on content wish list is more of Ray just wearing the turtleneck. I know I should focus more on how he’s basically reciting both Norman & Emma’s words here, but c’mon, the turtleneck is such a good look! (Also, he looks super cute here.. and calm, which is surprising since he’s about to cauterize Emma’s wounds. I’d be freaking out but hey, he’s seems confident enough about it, so good on him.)

Aahh, even more memories I desperately wanted to see.

Emma’s dream continues to flourish and so quickly too, as it’s only been about two weeks since the escape. And Ray’s eyes look so pretty here wth.

Favorite panel/moment:

I can’t possibly just choose between these two moments because they’re equally as important to me as they are to the characters. Firstly, we got Ray offering his assistance to Violet & Nigel by guiding the 50+ kids along the three week route back to the shelter. This is so very important because he’s choosing other people over Emma aka his best friend/the girl he would give his very life for/the girl he promised to protect at all costs. This something he probably would’ve never done a couple months ago, but because it was Emma’s hope for everyone to survive and escape GP, of course he’s going to take charge of her wish when she’s down and out.

“He chose to escort a large group of children to safety, knowing he would be on edge for three weeks constantly worrying about Emma’s condition, instead of making the quick trip back with Yuugo because he knew how important it was to her that those kids, new members of their family, remained safe and feel what true freedom is.” - me, once again quoting myself because I’m lazy.

It isn’t like Ray’s making this decision haphazardly either. He goes the extra step to make sure Emma is well protected and given the best chance at survival, which means he’s gotta put all his trust into Yuugo (aka the dude he very much despised the previous day for allowing Emma to be snatched up by the poachers in the first place) to bring her back to the shelter in time. Also, this is the first time Yuugo calls Ray by name and I love how it parallels Yuugo using Emma’s name in ch90, as he agrees to follow each kid’s respective plans on both occasions.