#god... fuck man!!!! i dont want to fucking do anything now
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drewstarkeysring · 2 days ago
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She did what?- Drew Starkey part 2
˚⋆ ୧ ‎ ࣪ Warnings Cheating , Odessa , swearing
Summary Hollywood is so overrated, but when Larissa finds out what our beloved Drew is up to, shit hits the fan 💋
"I miss you how you made me feel last night"
"When can you leave her house already, I need you"
You're Gut feeling all your friends talked about having when they have gotten cheated on. You said to yourself you would never feel that. Drew was good to you, no signs, no evidence. Until now, you can't breathe. heartbroken is the feeling you felt.
It's been an hour, and he still sleeping.
I looked through all of the messages. He has been gone for two months, which means for those two months. He has been lying and cheating with her. The girl you hate, you knew she always talked shit to her friends when you would be with Drew at a bar. You brushed it off because you never wanted to ruin the moment.
"What are you doing on my phone," Drew says, staring at me. He is caught, and he knows it. He has been awake for the past 5 minutes.
Disbelief is all you feel, the man you loved for 2 years who you thought couldn't hurt you in a way that all your friends told you or the internet. Deeply in love with this man. The hurt you felt, and he was about to hear it.
"Are you kidding me, the shit I found on your fucking phone, you cheated on me with this bitch, be so for real right now Drew". You say
He looks like he has seen a ghost, a ghost that is about to get put through the ringer. "I don't know what to say... I'm sorry baby". He says
"Dont call me that, we done Drew, Done. I have nothing to say to you". you express
"I am gonna leave save us both the trouble". Drew says
I take his phone and throw it against the wall. It shatters. Thank God fuck that hoe. Crash out is all you think but let this motherfucker think you're calm and collected.
A few days later
Brian, your best friend, always was in a show with Odessa. You needed a friend that made you feel at home. Both you and Brian made it up together. You met him at an award ceremony and knew he would be family. He was there with you for everything: first Big Movie, First Vogue Magazine Cover, Victoria's Secret shot, and plenty of other amazing accomplishments. He gets you and always supports you through everything. A big brother that you always wanted.
"I really can't believe him, two months away from you, and you would think he was thinking of you, but no, just thinking with his Dick," Brian says, he takes a sip of his wine.
You roll your eyes. "I wanna kill her and him. Everything I gave to that man and sacrificed for him, cheating, was never on my radar for him. Especially with her, like dude, the bitch is all over him 24/7 you would think, hello, he has a girlfriend maybe I should back away and stop trying to fuck him anymore, but no, my boyfriends fucking her in Italy for two months, while his girlfriend is home waiting for him and missing him." you express in disbelief
"If I could take anything back, it would be that boundaries are a major thing, that first night I met her, I should have known that she wanted him all over him and how she would brush me away every time I would speak."
Sitting on the floor with Brian as the TV in the background was just for noise for your ears. Chineses was just ordered, and Brian brought you your favorite red wine and yap session.
"You're perfect, beautiful as people would say," Brian says jokey. He nudges your shoulder, teasing you. "Don't let this silly man drive you crazy you have major things coming for you, accomplished many, and our the people's princess if you have any takeaways with this shit, it would be he lost the baddest bitch he will ever meet. You should be proud of yourself but do not, and I mean I do not let this shit get you off your tracks, major things are happening in your life. Oscar red carpet for Anora, Fenty shoot, and Vanity Fair shoot with Lily-Rose Depp. Life has shit planned for you." He says while hugging you and reassuring you of your worries. "I love you hoe". He nudges you again.
You roll your eyes. "Love you more boo". You hug him
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mahoushoujoindisguise · 21 hours ago
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The Path of Hell: A Curly Retrospective
So I decided to make a follow-up of this post because the idea has not left my mind and I do not plan to suffer alone.
((it should be noted that this analysis is purely my own interpretation. It is not my intention to say that my analysis is the definitive one, feel free to add something if you wish))
((Also to clarify that I am using screenshots of ManlyBadassHero's Gameplay for this analysis))
The Ladder Scene:
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One of the main scenes that motivated me to make this post was the iconic scene of the broken stairs in the red ocean. Because I noticed how whenever I watched YouTube channels playing the game or analyzing it, the majority seemed to interpret the stairs scene as another of Jimmy's hallucinations, alluding to his comment in the cockpit.
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But I dont think those images are from Jimmy's head.
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But from Curly's.
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The broken stairs that leave him stuck in the water to drown, the warning signs up on the sky, the chilling sound of the alarm, the supposed sun in the distance, getting closer and closer...
Those are the last things Curly saw/felt before the crash.
youtube
Now everyone will be thinking: "wait, if this is supposed to refer to the crash, why does it happen right when its Jimmy's Psych Eval?"
Simple, because this is not only a flashback of the game, but Curly remembering the first thing that unleashed everything while he is alone in medical
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That man is literally trapped in those four walls if no one comes to check on him. Completely alone with his thoughts plus the effects of painkillers to keep him company, you can only imagine what is going through his head.
Can you imagine him repeating every decision, every inaction, every word he said in those last weeks before the crash on a loop?
Was he thinking about all the times Jimmy abused his good will? Or was he trying to rationalize his actions? Refusing the idea of thinking badly of Jimmy until the very end.
After all, he should have prevented this, this was his fault duty.
He was the Captain, this was his responsibility
((Take responsibility))
.
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"Perhaps I should have opened up more to Anya..."
Not him.
((Take responsibility))
.
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"I should have listened to what she was trying to tell me..."
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Why didn't I take her seriously...?
((Take responsibility))
.
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"Fuck, did he say something I overlooked...?"
((Take responsibility))
.
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"I shouldn't have told them so soon..."
Was that what set him off...?
((Take responsibility))
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"Is that what she wanted to tell me..?"
.
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"I say Anything, did I...?"
.
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"But I didn't give her the gun..."
Why didn't I?
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God...
What the fuck did You (I) do?
.
.
.
"I guess..."
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"that doesn't really matter anymore..."
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ethereal555 · 19 hours ago
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FUCK BOY PT.1
player!jude x stonerblackfem!reader
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You laugh, not quite believing your ears, “What?'
'Please don't make me say it again. Honestly baby, I'll never forgive myself'.
You fixate on him. The man you loved, gave your body to and had the lowest of lows with has done the one thing he promised never to do.
He betrayed you.
You get off of the couch, as if it’d become hot lava. You feel your blood vigorously pumping through your veins, heating up your cheeks and ears. Like church bells had just gone off, your ears were ringing.
“Get out my flat - now” you forced out shakily, you felt as if your throat was closing in. Your chest raising rapidly.
He blinks, as if I was speaking a foregin language.
'No, sit down' he pleads reaching for my hand. You swat his hand off of you, taking a huge step away from him.
“Jude please, I don’t want you to touch me. How dare you think you can even come into my home right after disrepecting me? Do you think I'm a joke?” you pant
'I'm not going to even ask you why you did it? She's clearly who you wanted all along. The world's right; you only got with a black girl to make your Mum feel better. I swear I should have listenied when they called you a man!fucking!whore”.
'I've wasted my time with you, time I'll never get back'! I realise in hysterics. You feel like someone has hit a wong in your ear, its an intense feeling you feel in your head. You cover your ears to silence your thoughts that were going off on autopilot.
You pace around going on a tangent, finding all the offesive words in the dictiionary to throw at him. You search to find any small inanimate objects to throw at him, a way to inflict the hurt you felt emotionally onto him.
'Yeah, Yeah,ok' he bitterly chuckled trying to play off as unfazed, as if all the lethal words you spat had fallen upon deaf ears. His jaw was tense, it was taking everything for him not to shut you up himself, but he knew how genuinely wrong he was in this situation and how much he deserved the names so he decided against taking any action. This time.
You scower the kitchen trying to find any items that were bought for you by him. You take the Gucci scarf off of your kitchen highchair, lobbing it at him. He sat there, with the nerve to have a scowl of his face 'Take it' you yelled as you threw the cloth. 'I don't want anything of yours, you're disgusting'.
It landed on his face, and he, in an act of self -discipline didn't react, folded it up placing next to him on your couch, licking his lips. I must admit it must've taken a lot for him to not retaliate, the Jude last year was another story.
'This too’', you removed the burgundy coloured Van Cleef bracelet he had gifted you for your birthday back in May, aiming it for his face. The athletic boy, with instincts like a cat, caught this too, placing it untop of the scarf next to him. His left leg was shaking with irritation. A scowl on his face. His teeth tucked into his plump bottom lip as he sat back cross armed on the couch, pissed.
“You're not fucking intimidating me, not in my own house. Good try. GET the fuck OUT JUDE!”
I was seeing red, because he wasn't listening to me. My nose and eyes running like a water fountain. I looked a hot mess. I wipe my face with the back of my hands. Embarrassed.
To my advantage, I find my tedbaker slippers on the floor near the door. I laugh at myself picking it up with full intention to throw it -
He stand ups “Don’t you fucking dare, I swear to God Tiana act like you have some fucking sense”.
'I will do whatever the fuck I want to you. You’re not welcome here anymore, I dont want you in my house anymore. Listen to me Jude, for once... leave' I cry, shaking. “I’ve told you to leave and you’re still here”
“I can’t, I can't leave you. Why dont you listen to me for once, just once, I can explain” he fought shouting over her cries.
'Why dont you understand' i hiccup, 'i cant, i physically cant sit here, whilst you, a fucking vile the vilest man ive ever met, wants to speak, to me and justify him sleeping with someone he's lied to me about for 8 FUCKING MONTHS'
' A bitch that racially abused me, and you fucking too? You are not worth anymore of my time. Like, really Jude? Are you that fucking desperate for pussy? Are you that desperate to hurt me? For fucks sake, if you really needed to fuck someone, at least fuck someone that resemebles the woman you claim to love 'more than football' she looks nothing like me Jude' you drag..
'It didn't happen rec-' he started
You felt the waterworks again but you didnt want to give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry. It was the fact he wasn't understanding that him explaining the details was causing you to have to envision him with another woman. Having had enough of this row, you turn around immediately going to your cabinet to get your pre rolled blunt.
'I wasn't in the right mind, I have no excuse, it was a genuine mistake. Baby, please..' he argued.
You turn on your stove, shoving your blunt into it, to light it. You sit on your counter once it finally draws and you inhale deeply, making sure to cough so it hit you harder, Cali. You weren’t in the right mental headspace to deal with this sober.
“You hear me Ti?” he begged
It was like pathetic fallacy, a dark day for you emotionally and the only things illuminating the house were the many Central London streetlights outside your grand glass windows as well as your purple led's shining from your room upstairs.
'You can check my phone, my social media DM’s, theres not one trace of a woman Tianna, because I've decided all I need you. You don't understand I cant do it without you- this thing called life, no. Hell i cant even go a day without thinking about you and the life we could have’ he confesses clapsing at his heart.
Then there's a deafening silence.
You transfix on him fresh tears still imprinted on your cheeks, as you inhale, one toke after another after another. You both hold each other’s eye contact for a split second, before you withdraw focusing on your blunt.
The boy you loved most in the world, now turned traitor, sat across from you looking helpless. The only things that can be heard in the flat were both your infrequent sniffles, your sharp inhales and distant modes of transport outside.
Emptiness.
He rubs his eyes, typical, always seeming to cry when you cried, excusing it as something he couldnt help because he loved you so much. Well if only he thought of that before he decided to fuck the bimbo.
You snigger, you’re eyes low, the weed has you feeling like you’re floating.
“Jayy” You drag, your head and body feeling extremely light
“Yeah, yes” he answers quick, attentive
“You know, it’s a true shame, for Denise. I just wonder, like, if only she knew what an absolute bitch she would have raised before having you, would she have had an a-' you giggle
' Don't finish that sentence or we'll have a problem' he growls shooting up, charging towards me.
'Get up off the counter now, Tiana. Have you lost your fucking mind?' he spat. His natural doe - shaped eyes enlarged with anger, this dark brows furrowed.
You look at him, your giggles disentergrating into the air just like your weed smoke, daring him to do what he's been doing indirecting for the past 8 months.
'Fucking dare do what, what are you going to do about it? Hm, Jude? I’m going to continue to make you feel like shit until you leave because I’ve asked you to LEAVE MY HOUSE and you're still here, so take the insult”. You take another puff of your blunt, feeling the anger rising again.
Granted, the blunt was probably making you say things you shouldn't, he deserved it.
“I could’ve hurt you, so so badly” he lets out his jaw clenched.
'I beg your pardon?, you fucking idiot what do you think I'm -“
'Shut up and let me talk, i could have kept it silent and have the whole world find out at the same time as you, but i didnt. i've flown here on Chrismas to tell you. To be here I’ve sacrificed spending time with my brother and my parents. I've literally put your feelings and wellbeing first before my families,before mine but you're too bloody dense to be objective and see things from another person's perspective'.
You drop your blunt on the counter, hopping off of it. At the same time, not caring if you blew the rest out in his face, although you knew he hated the smell.
'I don’t give a fuck about how it all unravels, or who's feeling you are putting first over others. You got your self here in the first place, you wouldnt be in this predicament if you had some sense about you; and stayed loyal to what we have built. And shit, even if you genuinely needed to fuck a girl, do better next time and fuck a woman who wont go round running your business, dumb boy. But you're too thick and pussy hungry to realise that' she seethed pushing at his chest with every last world.
'Jude, we are sooooooo done' you ridicule 'i cant actually emphasise it enough'
'We're not, technically can't be. Tiana, we havent been together since March, which is another reason I dont know why you're so angry'
You sneer, clenching your fists as your sides. Your nostrils flared, you decided against screaming or shouting; you didn't have the energy. So using up all the mature strength you could muster, you leave to go to your room. Genuine rage and shock slapped onto your facial features. You barge past him walking at high speed until he grips your wrist pulling you back to stand infront of him.
'Don't walk away from me when I''m speaking to you.' you snatch out of his harsh grasp.
You push at his chest, 'I've told you stop touching me, Jude. I'm walking away because this conversation can't be had with a 2 year old.'
'And who's the two year old?, I havent been the one throwing a fucking tantrum this whole time and gettting high thinking it’s cool, whilst an adult has been trying to have a mature conversation with you! He spits.
'A tantrum ? I have everyright to be fuming. You’re so lucky I'm high right now you should thank God because, if I was sober you know exactly what would happen' you threaten.
'Yeah I do know, because that’s the type of person you are. You’re so quick to dehumanise people',
“And rightfully so for you at least.. so... where do we go from here? Nowhere, bye. Shut the door after you'.
You push yourself off of the kitchen counter, that you were reluctantly leaning on.
'Stop fucking walking away from me. Tiana. We’re not finished. Act your fucking age', he exclaimed trapping you between himself and the counter, leaving no room for you too escape. Both his arms, decorated in bulging green veins, clenched either side of you.
He gets in my face as if you make it clear to me ‘I’m going to ask you again ok.. Why are you so fucking angry?'
'BECAUSE YOU'RE STILL FUCKING ME JUDE ME !!! WHAT DONT YOU UNDERSTAND!! you rage in this face.
You feel you're eyes watering again so you break out from his constraint and turn around to go a relight your blunt before taking another 3 tokes.
“What type of question is that-have you no emotional intelligence or sympathy?” you exhale
'Because you fly me out to Madrid to fuck and hang out. You choose to spend time with me when instead you could be with your family or friends. You come over here during you're off season to fuck me, kiss me, cuddle me, give me presents, bags and jewellery. You eat my ass, we've been fucking on my period for Gods sake - all these things have happened whilst we've been broken up. so dont - please dont try to play it like we're just sneaky links, sneaky links dont have history , sneaky links are not ex's'
'For Jobe’s birthday you flew me out, for Mark’s and Denise’s birthday you flew me out to celebrate with you and them. When you went to go check on your grandma I was there, all of this happened when we were broken up. Doesn’t this sound particularly “together” to you ?
'I explicitly rememeber telling you that if this was truly over than the fucking, and seeing each others family and all that had to stop, and then what did you do, you came to London the very next month and stayed 3 nights.'
'So excuse me for feeling cheated on, Jude’ you pant, out of breathe, you take some tissue roll from your counter top, wiping your eyes. Saying all of this makes you feel dumb, and taken advantage off.
He only looks at you, with regret, sympathy. Stillness befriended him. He turns around going to sit down.
“I wish you and Laura the best in the future.”
Jude sits down on your black fur rug, playing with his fingers, something he never did unless we was uncomfortable. His plump lips parted looking at the ground.
He clears his throat, his eyes glazed over. His tone was soft, you'd given a different persepctive he was to blind to have seen
'Love, I've tried to explain to you that there was no emotional connection there with Laura, she was something easy, she was something i used, as horrible as it sounds, to distract myself from the fact that i felt like i might lose you, the love of my life. But now that, well, we were back on track I feel the need to tell you because i don’t want anything in the way of our relationship progression. I - can assure all the while we have been sleeping with other, i swear i havent so much as touched another girl, this happened in early April before we started messing around again. When you gave me the expression it was really done. I needed to tell you about it today, because she’s been threatening to tell people and news outlets. And if she did that-“ he paused swallowing the lump in his throat.
'It would kill me Ti, you have to believe me, i don’t want to do this thing called life without, i'd rather die' he swears.
You stand there watching him, your blunt was now finished and to be honest you were so high, not even his most compassionate love poem would sober you up.
You start to clap, obnoxiously 'Weooooo, and the Oscar goes to Jude Belligoallll, wooooo', you fall into a fit of laughter.
He wasn’t amused. Not one bit. He looks directly at you, his widened eyes connecting with your red hazy ones.
You walk over to sit down infront of him on the floor. He listens attentively.
'Ok that was mean, sorry' you giggle
'Jude you can't hurt me and then apologize expecting everything to be better again, we need to - ' you hesistate trying to find the right words.
'To, level the score, surely. You play football baby, you know how it goes. We need to draw, right now its 1-0 to you. When I score, then its over right because then it'll be 1-1', you advise.
'Between me and you' I lean in closer, he stares following my lips.
'I like the look of Levi', you draw back, you lick your lips. The cotton mouth getting to you.
'I need water Jude, and you look like you've just seen a ghost. So I'll make that two waters, since you're not going to leave anytime soon right?'.
He snickers,a frown on his face when he grabs my jaw, tight.
'You're not going to do such a thing, not to me'
'So what? you can do it but I can't, boy please' you tut trying to leave from his grip.
'Sleep with him or any man for that matter and I swear I'll make you miserable' he swears
Your mouth drops, the audacity you think mentally
'Jude you're insane, clinically -'
' I mean just think of all the friends you've lost, because they were trying to fuck me, all those friends you've had to cut off are at my beck and call you know that right'
'You wouldnt dare' you snatch out of his grip on your jaw. You felt dizzy moving your head too fast, and the cali was only intensifiying both feeling of heartbreak and dizziness.
'I actually hate you Jude, oh my God, why would you say that?" you softly cried. It was such as slap in your face, espeically because those women he was mentioning were childhood bestfriends that it had taken you ages to get over, still to this day.
You stumble up, stomping into your room, slamming the door shut.
'What, are your feelings hurt baby?" he shouts after me, mockingly. His voice following me up the stairs.
---
part 2 may have smut
this was requested, a toxic jude. this page is for my girls that have been through many toxic relationships. im here to heal you LMAOO
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bl00dh0rs3 · 1 year ago
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it. Is SO fucking hard to stay motivated to keep writing when every other month theres a fucking AI Scare. Where my stupid dumb fucking ass says "you know, this time ill actually jump ship and go somewhere safe with my art!" Only to inevitably lose THOUSANDS OF FUCKING WORDS OF EDITING IT MY FUCKING ***O U T L I N E***, THAT ID GOTTEN TO LOOK S O FUCKING PRETTY AND FLESHED OUT!!!!
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shaadowmilkcookie · 4 months ago
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One of Shadow Milk’s many prop replicas of himself, left behind. Even though the eyes are forever staring straight into the distance… Oddly enough, you still feel like you’re being watched.
But surely, though, it won’t hurt to take it home and touch up the colours, right? :)
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tokyoteddywolf · 1 month ago
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Not me debating writing an Aventio fic based on a book I really loved... urgh-
I got Aven recently and just finished his arc in Penacony and I am incredibly bored! I wanna write while I have the energy...
Lemme know if I should :p
Basic premise is its based on a book called Written In Red, which I feel absolutely fits Aventurine??? Look at the book first, give it a read, and tell me the main character doesn't remind you of him. I will go feral.
Anyways if you don't, the premise of the book is that the main character, a blood prophet who is also a slave, escapes and runs away from captivity to a town in order to hide and live amongst sentient predators called "Others", basically ancient as fuck monsters that can swap between animal and human forms. Others actually do prey on humans, but it's modern times and they have a begrudging agreement to coexist with humans because they make decent stuff that the Others can't create. The main character ends up living among them and figures out herself, while also teaching the Others some new things. It's actually a nice book in my opinion.
I'd have to reread the book but yeah. That would be the very basic idea. I already have a character list of who is who lmao.
I wouldn't make it a carbon copy of the book though, not with the characters I have in mind, but it would be a similar plot at least. Consider giant wolf Ratio, everybody, that's all I'm giving you.
So...
EDIT: Holy crap that's like 50 people and it hasn't even been a day-
Here you go ya feral bastards jesus-
Warnings for gore, violence, blood, people get torn apart and eaten you have been warned. (Can only be viewed if you have an account)
Enjoy
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ratatatastic · 5 months ago
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"Battle of Alberta, right? It was my first game: Calgary, Edmonton. We would play them in the preseason, and you know—trying to make the team I'd always be asking him to fight in preseason, always. I'd be runnin' my mouth—like, tryna fight the biggest, baddest guys, tryna make an impression.
And he would never fight me. He'd always tell me, like If you make the team, I'll fight ya. You don't have to worry about that, but I'm not fightin' ya preseason. And I totally respect it, I'm not gonna chase him down. It is what it is. He's established—I'm looking for my chance.
So I get called up, we're playing Edmonton in Edmonton: Battle of Alberta. [He's] over there on the other side, and it's like the coolest thing ever... you know, the buildup was crazy 'cuz I knew if the opportunity presented itself—if the game went the way I hoped it would, I would get an opportunity to fight him.
I remembered in warmups tryna skate by the redline initially just kind-of gettin' a feel for it—to see if I have to say something or whatever... He's got no bucket on, his big, bald head is glarin' around, he skates by the redline with the biggest smile on his face, and just gives me the biggest wink...
At that moment I knew Okay, he remembers. It's gonna happen at some point.
We were up 1, I think it was 2-1 going into intermission or whatever—Oh, no, I think it was 1-1 and we had just scored so the position I'm like Yeah, I don't know if I can fight him now because we have the momentum and we're winning the game. I don't want to lose a fight, then we lose a game and now I'm, like, never getting a chance again.
You kind-of gotta play the game within the game like [...] there's an opportunity to fight, and there's an opportunities where you shouldn't fight. Things weren't looking good, then they score and now we need a spark. I'm like Fucking perfect.
I just skate by their bench and I'm like It's time, big boy! He jumps out, we line up, and he goes We squarin' up or we goin' right away?
I'm like I'm not fuckin' squarin' up with you right now! We're goin' right away!
Drop em, we go right away, grab each other. I know he's a lefty so he's gonna let go—let's go of my right arm before he throws one. I threw one. Big boy went down, he jumped back up pretty quick. I don't know, I tell people all the time, I'm like I would've been in the league fuckin' 2 years earlier if there was good footage of this fuckin' fight!
For some reason—For some reason, the cameras cut out. I don't know if [he] had his cousins working the cameras or something that night, or if they're in the video room or what happened.
That was my first NHL game.
It's funny 'cuz Chucky was there—Chucky's there and he knows, he saw, he always laugh when I say that I would've been in the league earlier 'cuz he knows how things like that go. You get a little bit of energy and buzz around ya, and then kind-of momentum takes you a little bit further but unfortunate[ly], I missed that opportunity but I don't regret a thing.
[...]
The opportunity was there, I just—unfortunately, for whatever reason, the Hockey Gods said not yet." (Ryan Lomberg reminiscing over his first NHL game/fight) (x)(x) (please go watch the second link to see lombos giant smile as he tells this story jfc)
and other genuinely bonkers things to say about a hockey player in your first fight... like why did this need to be said like that...what
#ryan lomberg#lombo what the fuck#for the sake of clarity lombo does refer em by name but i think its funnier to obscure it in this case for people who dont know who it is#im sure edm and the bald description gave it away of who it is#but youll never fucking guess who this bitch is waxing poetic about#the wha the huh#HIM??????#WE'RE ROMANTICISNG THAT FUCKIN GUY??? REALLY????#i hate it here#this just in the guy you adore just said the horniest shit about the worst person you know#completely forgot they both were on the flames at the same time its been erased from my memory#(guy who does not pay attention to anything that is not pantr related)#but also matthew giggling about lombos little I WOULDVE BEEN HERE EARLIER IF THE CAMERAS WORKED RIGHT#how dare we lose him to calgary again HOW DARE#hello special little matthew cameo#the homoeroticism of it all#the inherent homoeroticism of hockey fights#why did he describe it like that#do you know what “scrappy ahler tries to make it big by fighting everyone in sight to impress staff and even challenges the enforcer vet#knowing itll make him look good if he does and said enforcer vet does not give him the time of day and goes i promise ill fight you when yo#get called up during the regular season not now and to which said scrappy ahler gets called up during the regular season and doesnt expect#much but gets completely surprised when the vet 1. remembers who he is 2. the promise he made and 3. even gives him a cheeky wink about it.#and the game is chippy from the start the ahler isnt sure theyll be able to fight hin but low and behold the hockey gods bless him#and he does he even gets to decide the rules AND wins it in one punch. the downside? none of it was filmed.#but the memory of that vets wink rings clear“ does to me man?#also. a classic case of hockey gods giveth. hockey gods taketh away.#sweetheart you can be gay AND also want your cool fight filmed honey youre asking for too much#yeah lombo does like calling men bigboy yeah that's a thing
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br1ghtestlight · 2 months ago
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me watching episode seventeen of inanimate insanity and Literally saying out loud to myself "this is so sad....."
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silly-lil-scribbles · 3 months ago
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me when i cant be someones favorite person all the time forever for no fucking reason: ah i see. hm. okay. i should go abandon everyone and everything and then kill myself
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cator99 · 3 months ago
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I always get detained at da border because PROFUNC never ended but basically I'm like if a targeted individual didn't even care
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mellotronmkll · 5 months ago
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I need to stop having one weird reaction with someone and then letting the anxiety decide in my head that the friendship is doomed because I ruined it like it's my absolute worst trait and I just have to move past it but it's hard
#i have to operate under the assumption that if people have an issue they will tell me but unfortunately this isnt true .#and it has happened to me in the past that i thought everything was ok because people were giving signals i wasnt picking up on#due to the autism so now im paranoid and constantly looking for signs i did something wrong and people are mad#and then i find them where they arent there which perversely does more to ruin a friendship than almost anything else#like the constant Are you mad at me... so i try to force myself not to do that and just#try to again assume that people arent however. im so worried about being blindsided Also of course i naturally dont want to make people#upset so if i am doing something wrong i want to change my behavior. however the fact its nuanced like#where you have to only do that a little bit and then take people at their word most of the time#fucking sucks like you actually are required in relationships to read peoples unspoken signals but you cant do that Too much#and if you misinterpet them its bad... but you cant ask for feedback too much because thats bad too. IT DOES MY HEAD IN actually like#it makes it so hard for me to interact with people because im just worried All of the time . and i have to be constantly like#ok check the facts and adjust behavior. check the facts and adjust behavior. make sure the facts are facts and not jumping to conclusions.#ok how do i do that . ok when do i ask directly. also people dont always tell the truth when you Do ask directly .#and then this is why my whole life i have mostly kept to myself and im trying to stop doing that but its hard because talking to others is a#puzzle for me that stresses me out more than anything else. man this sucksssssss can i just BE NORMAL!!!!!!#i know like Everyone has this problem its a common issue with relationships Communication but it feels especislly difficult for me .i#like cant fathom how other people manage very large numbers of friendships like even being able to count my close friends#on one hand i feel like im barely managing everything and im letting everyone down constantly but again i think thatsnonly my perception/#worry and not even true. god
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fauvester · 8 months ago
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bridgerton s2 was SUCH a clayhoun slay. thots in tags
#henry clay the ACCOMPLISHED rake (also a marquis and the richest man in the county)#who apparently ruined a girls honor and left her at the altar when she was engaged to someone else#the secret is that thats not true.. she was engaged against her will and he 'ruined her honor' so her fiancee would dump her#now his reputation is ~scandalous~ but like nobody cares about all the naughty stuf fhe does do (cards gambling horse racing drinking snuff#anyways duke tom benton visits him in the country seat hes retired to to do scientific farming and raise racehorses#(tom is the cousin of the girl that he ~ruined~. he almost challenged him to a duel but his cousin stopped him)#like. ok. soooooo I need your help#in love. with this guy. but. his older half brother HATES me and will NOT let us have a single god damn moment together#please help.... i know you.... sometimes do that sort of thing for people 🤔#clay flipping switches from Aw yeah i fucked your cousin lol get at me to UGH i cant believe lucretia fucking narced#benton like please. i will truly do anything sir. and clay like well..... thats a handsome arabian stud you bought last season..#whats a horse to a husband anyways? dont you love this fellow? all I want is a silly little animal!#anyways at first he tries to pretend to court mr hayne. so that benton looks like the more palatable option to mr calhoun#but hayne is instantly like Im ever so sorry! but if your intents are matrimonial i am already spoken for! <3 so sorry!!#clay like hm. welll. fine I guess I gotta seduce the older brother now#mr calhoun... the serious argumentative not-noble lawyer who s fighting suitors off his rich charming half brother with a pool cue#clay instantly falls in lust. and then quickly thereafter in love...#THE DRAMA.... THE ROMANCE... THE BOSOM CLUTCHING.... CLAY SNIFFING HOUN .. SO UNSERIOUS!!#bridgie3 came out and im nutlost. thats the post
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years ago
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The thing about bbc merlin is that the dynamic that's set up between merlin and arthur is so fucking good that I can't even. What can I possibly draw that's gonna encapsulate the feelings between them?
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goldiipond · 10 months ago
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maybe this is me having too much faith in the people calling for the extermination of an entire ethnic group but idk. i feel like the fact that israel has the most powerful settler colony on the fucking planet bending over backwards to defend them from literally every other country should be enough to make at least some zionists realize that they are not the good guys
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unforseencryptid · 2 months ago
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⁺ ⛧ ﹒ jurgen leitner ? — ˚ 🕯️  ⌢
“ stupid idiot motherfucking jurgen leitner god damn fool book collecting , dust eating , rat old bastard , shithead , idiot , avatar of the whore - ”
><﹐six , sixxol , sol , uc , cryptid , loop﹐🦇
🕯️﹐any / all + 17 + aroaceapl + abro ﹐★
﹑likes - tma , homestuck , lego monkie kid , persona series , drawing , figure skating , fanfiction﹒⟡﹒⤿
⛧ ﹔🥀﹒dislikes - bigots , wasps , needles﹐ıllı
!About you/info - pls save me from the self - inflicted suffering that is called “ drawing my characters reference sheet “﹒🪦
” - biggest clown in the circus , laughed out of town , cowboy motherfucking jurgen leitner ”
#intro post#tags are stupid#stop pinning me when i talk about jurgen leitner i hate him so much why does he have so many fucked up books ?#why did he decide to fuck around and find out just to set them loose#is he dead is he a bastard man has such a visceral affect on me not even in the room never seen this mans face and i know he has the worlds#shittiest beard get away from me#if i wanted to get into heaven and god said jurgen leitners waiting inside i would piss on gods feet for the sole purpose of getting sent#back down#if i have to deal with jurgen leitner speaking one word in person on voice in podcast not only will i close the tab i will delete my#bookmark out of spite and have to rewatch the entire series again for the purpose of being able to skip all the times when he is mentioned#or alive#i dont even know why i hate him so much. he collects books but i am just mad because i am angy#he better have some fucked up backstory to explain this if hes just some rich shithead whos a fan of creepypasta and wanted the irl version#ill go ham#better have had a book make him kill a man because if he didnt im going to make him#paypal dot com slash i fucking hate jurgen leitner#episodes not even about him. vaguely mentioned what is supposed to maybe be in his library and i fuckibg lost it#where the fuck is jurgen leinter if hes still alive im going to so deeply wish he wasnt#crusty old man#ill punch leitner and his sad frail old man twig bones will simply flake apart under my epic huge meat fist and he will disintegrate until#all thats left is one final book he kept on him simply titled Now You Fucked Up in ancient yiddish#im not breathing im hyperventilating at this point#i hope theres a date given for when jurgen died or will die so i can make it a reminder on my phone#every day once a year i will see it and do anything but pay respects to the man who had so many fucked up if true books#holy fuck i just hand typed the entire leitner rant /srs#thank you for coming to my ted talk
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parkercore-69 · 1 year ago
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guys im so unbelievably normal about him you wouldn’t even understand
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