#god they hurt me
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Vash and Knives (and just kinda twins in general) just haunt me mentally for the break between them and the pain that results from losing someone like that.
Like you were born together. You did everything together. You couldn't think of a world without the other. That wasn't a possibility. You knew each other body and soul. You were the only two of your kind that existed. You shared a face.
But suddenly a rift happens. You didn't know him like you thought you did. You're apart for the first time ever. You're completely alone for the first time ever.
Years pass. You have no idea what happened to the other.
You see him again. You're back together. You can finally be home. But...you're no longer aligned. You're not connected like you were. Your convictions, your reasons to live, everything you are is different now. But maybe if I just talk to him, maybe if I can make him see what I see again we can be together. Just like before.
But for now you have to leave.
More years pass. A century. You miss your brother, you wonder what he's up to. You think about how you can get him to see what you see.
You cross paths again. The time is over. You have to stop him. He has to see, you can't wait anymore. You can't stall.
You want him back. You want him home.
But everything is worse than it was last time. You're more different. You disagree on everything.
You yell. You fight. You can't believe the things he's saying. You can't believe the things he's doing.
...
He won't see it. He never will. You see that now. You're connection strained so much it snapped. He isn't going to change. He isn't listening to you, he never will.
He hates you.
And despite everything he's done, despite all the things he said...
You miss him. You still wish for him back through tears.
Because he was the only other one like you.
He was the only one who ever knew you body and soul.
He was your only brother.
#this is mostly pulling from Stampede since they do a lot more with the relationship between Knives and Vash#tragic siblings are like a drug for me#blasting Tek It again#god they hurt me#Trimax I cant even think about Knives or ill slam my head in a wall#and cry#trigun#trigun stampede#tristamp#vash the stamepde#millions knives#trigun knives#trigun vash#knives millions#vash trigun#knives trigun#vash and knives#vash#knives#trigun nai#trigun anime
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a compilation of jack and alex looking at each other like that
#they’re so in love ;-;#jack has always had feelings for alex and this is another hill i will die on#that one gif where jack asks alex if he’ll marry him makes me lose my mIND#god they hurt me#like the way they look at each other in that one especially makes me sob#they’re fr in love#friends don’t look at each other like that#i think a lot about how jack went to that acoustic performance on alex’s bday with the sole purpose of supporting him#he wasn’t a part of the acoustic show and he wasn’t interviewed#he was *just* there to support alex 😭#;-;#screaming sobbing crying#alex#alex gaskarth#jack#jack barakat#jalex#all time low
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to moving forward
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#gojo satoru#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itadori yuuji#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#satoru gojo#jjk manga spoilers#hina.comic#before any1 says anything i KNOw his birthday is in december ik ik ik this is just 2 show some post-battle bonding after the trauma#its winter in canon n megumi's birthday has passed and he spent it being piloted like a mech so they need to celebrate Now!!#also this was technically a request lmao anon wanted megumi birthday angst hehehehhe i hope u like it <3 bc it KILLED ME DEAD#im going to collapse remember when i said this wasnt harder than the hydrangeas im having second thoughts#page 8 made me want to bash my head in#could have stuck with one flashback image could have left them monochrome could have done literally anything 2 ease the workload#but noooo the chronic overachiever in me would not allow it#rule of threes i had to include all of them and they Had to be in colour it wouldn't have hit the same if i had kept it monochrome#i needed it to look how childhood memories look i needed it to look oversaturated and hazy and fond but unmistakably Gone#it may have killed me but im so proud of this rn like from an art style perspective these megumis and yuujis r top tier by my standards#personal favourites r the first and last panel of crying megumi like not 2 pat myself on th back but expression?????? hello??????#enjoy your cake megumi you've earned it <333 sorry fr hurting ur feelings it will happen again#oh my god i can sleep tonight bless <333 and i met my 3 day deadline NICE im so good at what i do
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names names names (3-4/4)
(1-2/4)
bonus
#(edgeworth voice) not like that phoenix god dammit#ace attorney#aa#ace attorney fanart#gyakuten saiban#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#larry butz#spoilers aa 3-4#dounart#narumitsu#if you squint#art#fanart#last panel made me want to smash my head against the nearest vertical surface how the fuck do you draw#me/perspective: enemies to arch nemesis arc (hurt no comfort)
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Scary Sunset.
I'm concepting things way outta order in this story, but I'm sure you can piece things together. Context is for a storybeat where, after defeating and capturing Adagio (thus having all three sirens in her possession), Sunset enacts her revenge plot to release the sirens on Canterlot as Thea discovers she's been manipulated. In a confrontation, the two scuffle and fight over the siren orbs while Sunset struggles with her conflicting wants and emotions.
#mlp#sunset shimmer#twilight sparkle#twiset#the orbs are the glass balls sunset carries on her back btw its in her cast line up art#deep down sunset hates thea. she was named “twilight” by celestia. the time of day succeeding sunset. she was always her replacement#but at this point in the story sunset's also fallen for thea. so it's also a conflict of wills in sunset. love or hatred.#hence the “don't make me do this” language. she's rationalizing her hatred and violence as thea forcing her hand and getting in her way#when in reality she doesn't need to do any of this. it's her last stand and outburst to cling to a life of revenge that she's grown too#fond of. because she knows thea has the power to change that and disrupt her identity as a pathetic victim who fell from glory#and that's scary. thea's a very scary thing to sunset because suddenly sunset wants something and to be someone new.#she suddenly wants to change. to be better for someone else. and she never thought or believed that could be an option for her#anyways toxic yuri yayyy#my art#the grand galloping 20s#character design#i hope i got across the pained conflicted emotions in sunset's face tho i belabored over them these past 3 days#i hope a look of anger and dissonance and guilt and “oh god i don't really wanna hurt you please just obey me” while trying to intimidate#is readable. if so it's all in the eyebrows babey
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you think YOU had a bad day at work?
bonus: sid shrieking "no!!!! NO!!!!!" loud enough to be heard in the stands and on camera
#this is now my FAVOURITE game i've watched in real life knocking the game misconduct one off the number one rank#he was so annoyed the entire game and so annoying about it :')#he kept shrieking away on the bench and i couldn't hear a word from where i was seated#but you could just hear this constant yipping away dhfsgfkjshgfsjf PLEASE it was so funny your 36-year-old babygirl was BARKING#drew kept sitting there like... is mom okay... i don't think mom's okay...#also extremely good for me (since he wasn't really hurt) was the whumpfest of it all oh my god what ancient gods did he anger.........#geno kept Hovering in concern#po kept giving him little shoulder pats the way a sweet brave babyboy would try his best to soothe a rabid little dog#ek of course kept trying to slide right inside him and also kept skating up to him and STARING him in the face in concern/lust/both#also guys this is my first time in canada ever!!!!!!!! i'm excited#anyway. very good game for me sorry for this post but you know i love a#long post#sidney crosby#evgeni malkin#pittsburgh penguins#also!!! to all who celebrate#ramadan kareem/eid mubarak#<333 staying with a friend here through the eid celebration and they've been cooking and everything smells so good
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there are a lot of evil people in the world and a lot of darkness in the world and so it’s very important for me to stress that now more than ever is the time to spread kindness and compassion. combat the evil by not only not partaking in it, but actively refuting it. destroy the notion that being compassionate or generous or kind to someone is uncool or embarrassing or even scary. be the change you want to see. start a chain reaction. positivity only breeds more positivity. do an act of kindness for someone so that that person who is too afraid to do it themselves can see you, realize that they’re not alone, and perhaps sheepishly follow your example. and then the next person who is too afraid but sees that person can do the same. when bad news comes out about bad people or horrible atrocities in the world it’s such an easy impulse to despair, and obviously it’s important to feel what you need to feel. grieve. be angry. be sorrowful. be empathetic. but dust off your pants and get up and be a part of a chain reaction that, no matter how small the scale, and spread compassion and love and care. all the reasons why you might not—“it’s hard! it’s scary! people will make fun of me! it’s useless because there’s too much evil!” are all grade A arguments as to why you should. you have no idea how many people you could inspire to do the same. even if it doesn’t get you anyway far, you can at least say you have the nobility of trying. please choose love and please choose life. you are worth loving and you are worth inspiring others to love
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I’m not going to get into it, but today really helped hammer home how living with my parents was keeping my nervous system in a constant state of fight or flight.
Every minor thing is a catastrophe that must be maximized to the utmost extreme. Unless it’s something that I express distress over. Then I’m probably just being silly and looking for attention.
#chronic health tag#dysfunctional family#the interaction through me into a flare up#which I was already struggling to avoid#but god knows that’s not important is it#my skull hurts
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‘Poseidon left a party in Ethiopia because the sea vibes went rancid after Odysseus set sail’ feels like a bit I would make up, but no. That actually happened.
#poorly drawn odyssey#the odyssey#poseidon#odysseus#Continuing my running theme of bird gods - Poseidon is an albatross!#Following the whole theme of sailor’s superstitions - one must never hurt an albatross. Lest misfortune be upon ye.#This comic was a lot funnier in my head (though that might be attributed to the fact I’ve had so little time to draw lately -#So all my comics take a a few days to finish... I have more time to get pessimistic and weary of the joke not landing.)#But I hope fellow Odyssey fans can appreciate my vision for a critically underrated scene.#I am once again here to let all those uninitiated know about how funny the Odyssey is.#Poseidon flung himself from Ethiopia to the Mediterranean sea to vibe check a shriveled sobbing man.#Now *that’s* what I call petty bitch behaviour.#I will be back with more comics - ones that are a lot funnier than this one.#Nausicaa's scene is next. If you know you know.#(Thank you again to everyone who chimed in to let me know there *was* overlap and an interest in me posting more Odessey comics!)
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Yo so it’s April 27 you know what that means. Happy Death Day, Jason Todd
#jason todd#dc robin#Why ain’t you in your grave?#the red hood#The Joker has a Deathwish#“I thought I'd be the last person you'd ever let him hurt“#Bruce I forgive you for not saving me. But why why on God's earth... is he still alive
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sorry these kinds of comments have been really pissing me off recently lol
#it's been kinda hard for me to pinpoint WHY exactly these sort of comments feel insulting#but i think it's mostly because it implies my original work is purposefully and inherently derivative of things i have no connection to#while i think being derivative in art is. kinda unavoidable in a sense (and something i'm aware i do consciously and unconsciously)#it feels like a slap in the face when people imply that my work cannot hold its own merit and need to be compared to#something in the popular conscious#and like sometimes people don't know it's original art which is fine#but it also doesn't hurt to ask if it's original instead of just. immediately assuming or comparing it to something else#i know this will only get more difficult as i continue to drift away from fanart and fan works#but i really want to be able to be proud of my original work and i want to share more! because it's a part of me!!#but its really hard when it feels like i'm always going to be compared to things people care about more!!!! AAAUGH#god. ok sorry i need to get that off my chest. if anyone compares computer angel to TMA again im gonna start eating drywall#fern's sketchbook
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i need help with vet bills (again).
hi. for those of you who remember, earlier this year i asked for donations to help me afford toos' vet bills, who we found out through your help had kidney failure, and again with your help we got her on medication for it. unfortunately it wasn't enough, and we lost her. and then shortly after, dexter began deteriorating, which we put down to his grief of losing toos - she kept him young, he followed her everywhere, he only played because of her, he only ate when she ate, etc. without her he just stopped. and then he started to have seizures and fits daily. we got him blood tests, but he was suffering so badly. we made the decision to put him down. i didn't ask for donations this time, because i was so deeply embarrassed to ask for help again. but we are still recovering financially from that, as well as the parts of toos bills that didn't get covered from donations. my mother hasn't worked for a very long time, she's disabled and very sick, and she receives PIP from the government that only covers her monthly medications that are not covered by the NHS. my father retired early to become her full time carer, and we are living off his pension. i am too disabled to work, but because my mother already receives PIP and i live with them, the government are resistent to giving me any help - so i have zero income, and rely entirely on my parents.
this is jenny. she's a 14 year old cairn terrier, who loves when we garden because she wants to help dig holes. she helped us bury dexter and toos, digging their graves for them with my dads help. she's an angel, and loves people so much she likes to escape under the fence and join other families for awhile. one time she got into someones back garden and asked to come in as they were eating lunch. she really hates flies, and will try to bite them out of the air (she has never succeeded but i believe she will one day). she will rub her face against you until you start stroking her, and will growl and even bark if you stop! we don't have the money to take jenny to the vets, for a checkup or for anything they may want to do. this has been an ongoing issue, but toos and dexter took priority, and it hasn't been a bother to her. she existed as normal for a long time, but that's since changed.
jenny has this lump in her mouth, it is larger than the picture shows, but she is a nightmare to force open her mouth since this got so big, i think it's uncomfortable or painful for her. she can't properly close her lips now, and it has pushed all her front teeth away, misshaping her mouth, and sometimes it bleeds profusely. eating has become difficult for her, she can't eat anything hard, and currently will only eat soft human foods like rice, scrambled egg chopped up so small she doesn't have to chew, and things like soups and gravy. she's lost a lot of weight, and i'm getting frightened. to add onto it, i've found lumps like this across her body. i've done as much research as i can, and i believe it to be an oral tumor, it fits, and it looks right, and it spreading across her body is called 'full staging'. and going by all i've read - they will want to remove them in surgery. according to my research, this will cost anywhere from £585 - £4,740 for just the lump in her mouth. that's not including any checkup/test costs, or the other lumps on her body.
she hasn't been to the vet yet, i don't have any secure goal or bills to share, just my assumptions and beliefs from researching myself online. my parents refuse to take her because we can't afford it. i want to save up money, have it in my bank, and show them that we can help her now, before it gets worse, or it's too late. as i said before, i don't have any income, so the only way i can do this is with help.
here's a link to my paypal.me
the icon is a little mouse, and the @ is rivellon
i struggled so badly posting the first post like this for toos. i felt so guilty and embarrassed and ashamed. but i have no choice again, i want to help jenny. i don't want her to suffer. and selfishly, i can't handle losing another dog so soon. this year has been waking nightmare, and i need your help to stop it getting even worse.
please reblog and share, even if you can't donate.
thank you for reading.
#animal illness#animal sickness#pet illness#pet sickness#vet bills#vet help#i don't really know what to tag this as. i don't remember what i did before#and i don't want to go look for my toos post because it will hurt so bad to see it i think#im on hiatus because i cant deal with this and be here right now. but im gonna queue/schedule this a bit i think#im sorry for asking for help again. but please consider helping jenny. she's so lovely#and she's keeping me alive right now#losing toos and dexter ripped me to shreds and shes the only reason i havent completely broken down#i am absolutely terrified of what will happen if we lose her too#god i feel so fucking guilty. i can't stop fucking crying. i hate this so much#im so sorry guys. please reblog and consider donating even a tiny amount#tiny amounts add up yknow#anyway . i should post this now instead of hiding in the tags
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idk about yall but life is good again
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#HES SMILINIG MINUNGGJSGJVSFVSFJH#MY DARLING BOY MY SON WHOM I BIRTHED I LOVE YOU#fushiguro megumi the way i would kill/cry/die fr u ur smile cures depression waters crops etc etc#your zuko costumes pretty good but the scars on the wrong side...................#cant believe i lost the scar side coin flip smh leave it to me who does not know her lefts from her rights 2 predict the Wrong Side#sue me fr thinking yuuji lost an eye fr good n wanting them 2 have complementary injuries smh >:/#its ok im over it im over it im just so happy we got scarred!megu im so happy we got smiling!megu im so happy we got ALIVE MEGU#oh my god ive been up all night hand hurt hand ouch but its fr him its worth it i can keep going i can go all day if i need to#god its a good day 2 b a megumi stan
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the... way... henry... looks... so... fucking... happy... whenever... he's... with... alex...
#red white and royal blue#oh god he's down so bad as much as alex is for him#IT'S HURTING ME#henry fox mountchristen windsor#alex claremont diaz#firstprince#taylor zakhar perez#nicholas galitzine#rwrb film
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Just gonna have to wait and see, right? Just wait and see! Just gotta wait and see! Who knows, we'll just have to wait and see! It's anybody's guess, we'll just have to wait and see! The future is exciting, we just gotta wait and see!
#personal#my art#Fuck your fake ass 'i am very smart!' intellectualizing “observations” and open your god damn ears.#do something for fucks sake. it's sickening seeing videos of ai crap and seeing rows and rows of repliers using their one brain synapse#to type “wow! very exciting!” “haha this is kind of scary! but in a really interesting way!”#and then they go about their day without a second thought while creative industries burn around them#i go to one of america's top tech schools too and it's enough to make you wanna tear our your hair#every day it's seminars and talks about “the potential consequences of ai!” when the consequences are happening NOW#NO MORE DISCUSSING NO MORE INTELLECTUALIZING NO MORE SOCRATIC SEMINARS NO MORE DEBATING. ACT YOU COWARDS#people are getting hurt RIGHT NOW. stop pretending to care when you clearly don't! just be honest and say you wanna make money#my time here has really made me hate academic spaces. you people are so god damn useless and cowardly.
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what WERE tim and kon doing in that closet together that made kon have to get dressed afterwards anyway? wrong answers only. i'll start i think they were playing two person strip poker but tim cheated like a motherfucker. actually wait that doesn't make this sound any less gay. um. hold on. there's gotta be something. um
#rimi talks#this was gonna be a bit but that actually doesn't sound any less gay than gay sex. okay. well#let me try again. um......#like there's the boring option (kon was changing out of a hospital gown and... tim was there too... for some reason...)#that STILL sounds gay god dammit#had the thought maybe tim just wanted kon to strip for a minute to verify he really wasn't hurt? BUT THAT ALSO IS STILL GAY.#graduation day is certainly a comic that exists but truly the closet bit is so .#winick you mad bastard etc#like i don't Actually think they fucked in there in terms of how i see their relationship progression in any canon adjacent context#but my GOD is it funny. sfhksfklsfgj#timkon#tim#kon
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