#that STILL sounds gay god dammit
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mamawasatesttube · 14 days ago
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what WERE tim and kon doing in that closet together that made kon have to get dressed afterwards anyway? wrong answers only. i'll start i think they were playing two person strip poker but tim cheated like a motherfucker. actually wait that doesn't make this sound any less gay. um. hold on. there's gotta be something. um
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oneofstarkskids · 5 months ago
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learn a thing or two
genre: flufffff
pairings: WLW, fury!reader x carol danvers
summary: carol has tried everything to get you to realize she's flirting. when nothing seems to click, she starts to wonder if she's falling for an idiot.
*not my gif*
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carol was walking down the halls of SHIELD, smirking at the gasps and whispers she would hear. "oh my god, she's here!" "i've never seen her in person." "isn't that-"
she took the elevator to the floor that held fury's office. to be perfectly honest, she didn't need to be here- on earth- anymore. surely there were other places in the galaxy that required her attention and specific skill set, but she had been distracted as of late.
and there it was once again. that pretty little distraction standing in the center of fury's office holding a stack of files. her eyes trailed up your body. the pantsuit you had on was nice, but carol couldn't help wondering what it would look like on the floor.
"fury," she nods as she enters the room. you turn around at the sound of her voice. she looks like the personification of sunlight. dammit. focus.
nick responds, "carol. surprised to see you still here."
she never takes her eyes off of you, "actually, i was talking to this one." you raise a brow ever so slightly in surprise. your father just frowns.
carol let's a playful smirk dance across her lips, and you quickly turn back towards your father. "if that's all, then i will take these down to central and have someone organize them."
you're walking down the hall for only a few moments before the tall blonde appears beside you. "need any help with that?" she offers flirtatiously.
you don't seem to pick up her tone and shake your head, "that's alright. it's just files, but thanks."
her brows knit together, "okay well...maybe after work we can go for drinks."
you think it over for a moment, "can't. i have an early takeoff tomorrow. romanoff and i are busting some drug traffickers in peru. we've had surveillance on them for months now and they're finally letting their guard down."
carol laughed, "you could learn a thing or two from them."
"what do you mean?" you asked, completely oblivious.
she scanned your face for any sign of sarcasm. you were painfully serious. could you really not tell that she was hitting on you? carol didn't know how to make it any more obvious. "nevermind."
"you know...you better get back quick because i'm only going to be here for a couple more days," and when you didn't say much in reply she stopped walking.
you turned to see why she had stopped so abruptly. she had this exasperated look on her face. "is everything okay?" you asked.
carol's frown only deepened, "jesus, fury, what's it gonna take for you to notice a girl?"
"fury's my dad-" you corrected her.
she ignored you. it wasn't her fault you shared a last name with the man.
"i've been dropping hints all day. actually, screw that, all week!" she said in frustration. she was starting to wonder if you didn't like her back, but she'd seen the way you looked at her. she knew gay when she saw gay.
the only other explanation was that you were just plain stupid. "i don't know what you're-" you started.
carol couldn't bear to listen to that pretty little mouth say one more thing. she slowly made her way towards you, "let me put it simply."
"i've stayed on this planet longer than i have in a while. i spend every second that i'm at SHIELD trying to get your attention and i'm practically begging you to go on a date with me. how can you not see that?" she asked.
you looked somewhat confused and even a bit terrified.
"i thought you just saw me as fury's daughter," you said.
carol shook her head and reached up towards your chin, "i don't think about fury. i think about you."
her eyes fell down to your lips.
you'd had feelings for her before, but it always felt like she was off limits. carol just seemed emotionally unavailable in some ways, but then again...some could say the same about you.
but standing here with her looking at you like she'd set the world on fire just to touch your skin, it made your whole body light up.
you could feel electricity surging through you, but all you could focus on were her lips. it didn't even seem to matter that you were at work and anyone could be watching.
carol didn't move. she wanted you to put in the effort and you were more than willing. you leaned in quickly and suddenly all the built up tension was set free.
her hands found your waist and pulled you even closer.
"uh ehm," someone cleared their throat. you pulled away, flushed, to find your father standing a few feet away.
and despite the discomfort in his face and awkward energy that filled the air, you couldn't help but be grateful that he interrupted the kiss.
otherwise, you weren't entirely sure you'd be able to stop.
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luvvrz · 2 months ago
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The Odyssey Fucks Hard [Poolverine, 18+]
AKA: how the movie woulda went if I was at the table
Additional tags: ermmmm very gay 🤭 pain kink most def, lacks foreplay just right into the nasty, also a slight bit of degradation but not much
OTHER WORKS
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He's fucking grinning. Logan doesn't know why, there's blood in his teeth and a blade in his fucking abdomen, but he's grinning. Maybe he likes it when prey fights back? Or, better yet, maybe he likes it when someone can keep up.
Wade's still talking - when is he fucking not? You'd think in some bad ass fight scene like this one, the motherfucker would attempt to indulge. You know, less yapping and more punching. Then again, the man wouldn't be able to shut his goddamn mouth if it literally sewn shut. Sources? I won't elaborate.
Nonetheless, Logan's on top of him, and he's got a set of claws tucked neatly into his side. Wade arches up with a hiss, and they're pressed together, and *Christ*, the man's all muscle. Surely it's to be expected, but Logan doesn't enjoy using his brain often. It's not that he's stupid, he just... doesn't care enough to think. Neither does Wade, clearly, his next strained words a testament to that.
"No cup? I mean, you're prehistoric, so I know there's probably not a lot of swimmers left, but it's the principle, you know?"
Logan growls, fangs bared as his other hand swipes up to promptly wrap around the other's throat. He squeezes with a vegence, eyes narrowed and face twisted up in a bitter fury.
"Shut the fuck up. You haven't shut your mouth for one goddamn second since you showed up."
This prompts Wade to smirk, a sight hidden beneath the mask, but the way the eyes of it crinkle up is more than enough proof. Logan hates him. Logan doesn't think he could possibly hate anyone- or anything, more.
"Ooh, fiesty. Watch it, Wolvie, I'm into degradation. At least take me to dinner, first."
Logan snarls, grabbing a fistful of Wade's mask to yank his head to the side, slamming it into the nearest window. The man groans, a sound that Logan all-too happily chooses to relish in. They're still pressed together, chest to chest and hip to hip, and- holy fuck, is he genuinely twitching beneath me?
The anger on his face gives way to shock, if only for a moment, before that ever-present scowl is returning with a vengeance. Alas, he is a man, a man who is in constant denial of enjoying things simply because he doesn't believe he deserves it. Still, that doesn't stop his own dick from twitching weakly in interest, making Wade's head shoot up.
God dammit, he could practically hear the amusement in his voice.
"Is that a claw, or are you just happy to see me?"
He doesn't even have time to finish his sentence before Logan's claws are embedding themselves deeper into his side, as much of a promise as it is a warning. Wade's head falls back with a throaty groan. He is getting off to this, the kinky son of a bitch.
Still, no one addressed the elephant in the room, both figuratively and literally. Sure, it's been brought up, but the real question is, what is going to be done about it?
Wade's still talking a mile a minute, and Logan's sanity is slipping through his fingers.
"Calm down, baby girl, no need to blow a fuse. Sex is a perfectly normal thing that happens when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much, there's nothing to be ashamed about-"
You'd think a man that was almost 200 wouldn't have the kind of speed Logan does, but then again, Logan is not your average man. He's ripping Wade's mask up with a quickness even light itself would envy, meeting his lips in something of a kiss. Sure, it's all teeth and tongue, and he's growling like a pissed off bitch in heat, but... it's a kiss, as far as Wade's concerned!
As far as Logan's thought process goes, though, he just wanted quiet in the peanut gallery.
For the first time in this history of Marvel Universe, Wade Wilson is quiet. The air itself is silent, waiting on a baited breath to see what happens next - only broken by Logan's growling.
Logan doesn't break the kiss, not even as he begins to undress the man beneath him. The Wolverine is a man of many things, but patience is not a virtue he possesses, nor particularly cares for. A single claw extends to cut Wade's suit off him, resulting in a whine of pure despair.
"Hey, I was fondled like a French girl for that goddamn suit! Careful with the merchandise."
Logan cuts off his yapping with a particularly rough nip to the lip, sending the welcome taste of copper spreading over his parched tongue. The claws are on his own suit now, and for a moment, he's tempted to look for the zipper just to spite the other - but then again, his dick's throbbing and he'd honestly rather skip the formalities.
Unceremoniously, the suit is cut away, and soon enough, the pair are pressed closer together than pussy lips in a g-string. Wade's scars extend far below the collar, Logan's come to realize, and he retracts his claws only to temporarily ghost his fingertips along the divets in his skin. The gentleness doesn't last for long, though - as soon as he finds the hem of Wade's boxers, those, too, are being torn away.
Wade fucking giggles, twirling a strand of non existent hair as his other hand comes to cover his dick - not that it mattered much. If Wade Wilson had anything to be proud of, it was his fucking cock. His hand didn't leave much to the imagination.
"Careful, shnookums, I'm shy."
Now, a better man would've maybe indulged in some foreplay, maybe even prep. But Wade's a big boy, he can take it. Plus, maybe the stretch will give that mouth something else to focus on besides being the most insufferable being on the planet.
And so, Logan rather unceremoniously spits into his palm, before stroking himself. One pump, two pump, three, before he's deemed himself ready. He knocks Wade's hand away, before thinking better of it, and uses his own free hand to grab both his wrists and pin them above his head. The resulting smirk is instantaneous, and Logan can fucking see the gears in his head turning, preparing for another snippy remark.
Logan decides that he simply won't give him the chance.
His hips are pushing forward, brutal and impatient, and the initial stretch has them both gasping like a fish out of water. His grip on Wade's wrists tighten, bushy eyebrows furrowing as his mouth parts in a silent groan. His eyes flutter closed as he tries to focus on anything other than how freakishly tight Wade's ass is.
And Wade, he isn't much better off. If Deadpool is anything, it's a goddamn pain slut, and the sudden burn has stars exploding behind scarred eyelids. It's a strained grunt, more akin to a whimper, and his cock jumps angrily against his belly.
For once, the Merc with a Mouth has nothing to say - and not because he didn't want to, but because he can't.
There's something triumphant in Logan's eyes at that, a selfish sort of victory. A cruel, condescending smirk as he leans closer, tilting his head minutely. The pace he's settled into, it's rough, punishing, and Wade's brain simply isn't working as quickly as his mouth. The man's attempting to babble, but all he can muster is a few broken whines, and a guttural 'Jesus fucking Christ.'
"If I knew that cock was all it took to get that fuckin' mouth o' yers' quiet, I would've stuffed this fuckin' hole hours ago."
The Odssey fucks hard, Wade reckons, but Wolverine fucks harder.
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𝑳𝒂𝒅𝒚 𝑮𝒖𝒖𝒋𝒊'𝒔 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑭𝒐𝒓 𝑨 𝑺𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝑴𝒂𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏!? 
𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓: Yae Miko
𝑺𝒚𝒏𝒐𝒑𝒔𝒊𝒔: Yae is a diligent kitsune with a broad imagination. She needs ideas to keep the publishing house thriving, and would go to any lengths to get what she needs. However, what if pretending to be in a relationship with a shrine maiden isn't just for the sake of inspiration?
𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈: Just really fluffy and just a little gay. Love you guys!
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As sly as a fox is she, with her wits always about her but her playful nature running amok. The look in her eyes always either gleaming with a hint of mischief or glaring with the utmost solemnity. Yae is revered on all of Inazuma’s islands and even across the sea, where gods and their retainers alike recall her name and commend her for her power.
That being said, having the Lady Guuji casually walk up to you and strike up a conversation would have been unheard of. Especially if you’re a mere shrine maiden. She runs the show, always stern and diligent, expecting the same of those operating the Grand Narukami Shrine. This line of work is very sacred after all.
“Good morning, Y/N.” Yae greeted you as she walked over to where you were sweeping the deck of one of the small buildings. Everything in your brain was put on pause as you processed her greeting.
“Good morning, Lady Guuji!” You replied timidly, almost completely caught off guard by her specifically greeting you. The closer she got to where you were, the more the sinking anxiety feeling grew within your chest. She never usually has time for conversing with the maidens, so you start to worry that you either did something wrong or have boatloads of work– comparable to the cargo held in the ships that come in from Liyue Harbor.
You tried to focus on the task at hand– sweeping and cleaning up the shrine’s decks. Breathing along with the broom strokes, trying to calm down and catch your breath. However, the only sweeping actually happening was Miss Yae sweeping you off your feet. As per usual, it isn’t difficult to find yourself enamored by and in fear of the kitsune, but how could you not? With those purple eyes boring into your soul, you could drop dead any second.
“Why so scared? You did nothing wrong. You can untense. As if you even need my permission to do so.” She attempted to assure you with a slightly teasing tone. You let out a nervous giggle and tried your best to steady your breath and slow your racing thoughts. You propped the broom up onto one of the railings and turned to face her, bowing and coming back up with a sheepish smile on your face. Your expression is riddled with awkwardness and fear. 
She was trying to put you at ease, look eased, dammit!
“Is there anything important you need to make me aware of, Lady Miko?” You asked, expecting her to issue you orders or commend your upkeep of the shrine and walk away. 
“Actually, I do have something I’d like to talk to you about. I feel this isn’t the time or place though, so all I ask is  that we meet at the Uyuu Restaurant at your earliest convenience. Sound good, little one?” She asked with crossed arms and a smile. You nodded.
“Of course, Lady Guuji.” You accepted her invitation, still very nervous. She chuckled at your worried expression and smirked.
“Glad we arranged this. I hope to see you soon, Y/N,” She sang before walking off. You waited for her to leave before continuing to work, as she instantly rushed off to check on other areas of the shrine.
What exactly did she want? You wondered to yourself. It would have been a valid question, had your words not been caught in your throat. It’s really hard to think when her sakura scent is wafting into your nose, her eyes are only on you, and that smile of hers on her face. You’re aware that she is planning something, but cannot pin down exactly what. 
Could it be something to do with the Shogun? No. She would have known better than to choose a simple shrine maiden. Chances are, she would have called upon that traveler, the one Yae called on to assist her in bringing the Shogun back to her senses. Surely they would be a thousand times more effective and helpful than you.
It definitely wasn’t something regarding shrine work, unless, of course, it is. She has had plots in the past where she would have shrine maidens play roles to assist in the success of her plans regarding the supernatural. This matter didn’t seem to worry her that much though, she didn’t seem too serious. Of course, the kitsune was careful and excelled in masking her true intentions and emotions, but it seems that this wasn’t something too urgent.
Could the Lady Guuji herself be asking you to accompany her as a friend? That would be sweet but doesn’t ease you or shake your skepticism. As unlikely as this seems, she does like watching people squirm in her presence, it can be fun for her if she’s in a playful and jovial mood. But you? Really? You shake the thought, highly doubtful that this is actually the case.
Throughout the day, your racing thoughts began to fade as you performed your duties. Assisting in practices and performing simple exorcisms (or rather, faking it because the person in question isn;t actually possessed), deciphering fortune slips, etcetera. By the end of your day’s work, you had almost completely forgotten about Lady Guuji’s request until thinking about dinner.
You hurried down the steps of the shrine, all the way down Mt. Yougo and through the grassy fields into Inazuma City. Upon nearing the restaurant, Yae already stood, anticipating your arrival. She didn’t notice you at first, this led to you tapping her shoulder and slightly jumping back when she turned to you, smiling.
“I expected you to take longer,” she laughed “shall we head inside?”
You nodded your head as she made way for you to walk through the doorway first, she immediately followed. The lights inside were charming and the setting itself was nice and cozy as well. Yes, you’ve been here before, but never appreciated it as much until being invited by her. You noticed every little detail of the place; from the various scents moving through the air, to the creaking wood and chatter from other patrons. All of these surroundings occupied your mind, consumed you as a distraction from the butterflies fluttering in your stomach. 
The two of you sat at the bar, where you both ordered the ever-popular tonkotsu ramen. The silence was awkward at first, even though the ambience of the other customers made up for the lack of conversation from the two of you.
“Aren’t you going to thank me for inviting you out tonight, Y/N?” the kitsune joked. Due to your tenseness and nervousness, you had to fight the urge to apologize profusely.
“My apologies, Lady Guuji. I am very grateful for the invitation and am glad to be here with you tonight. Thank you.” You responded, almost like you were reciting something pre-rehearsed.
“You are allowed to call me Yae, you know? I understand that you’re caught off guard but I imagined that the shock would have worn off by now.” she remarked.
“It’s kind of… see, you’re highly revered and in all honesty, I’m glad you invited me out tonight but I couldn’t quite put my finger on the reason.” You explained to her, trying your best to avoid eye contact, yet stealing glances every few words or so.
“Let me explain.” She smiled and cleared her throat subtly.
“Recently, my ideas for writing have run dry as of late. Then it dawned on me that maybe something different is in order,” She started, “After all, Yae Publishing House is renowned for paving the way, is it not?”
“What might that be?” You asked, your interest piqued.
“Well, how many romantic light-novels have you seen with two female protagonists pining for each other?” She proposed. Come to think of it, she has a point. There aren’t very many or any at all. None that are well-known anyway.
“That does sound interesting, especially since I’m big into light novels, I haven’t yet found any with that being the focus. I would definitely read it, that’s for sure.” You beamed. Yae chuckled, thankful for your insight.Your bowls of ramen were gently placed in front of , the steam warming your face and the scent making your mouth water. You were still intent to hear her plans, so you gave her a look that urged her to keep speaking.
“Come now, eat. I didn’t invite you out for you not to eat, after all.” She smiled as she raised her ladle full of pork broth up to her pink lips, savoring every last drop. You couldn’t help but stare at her pleased expression, but looked away as she noticed you looking. You heard her giggling as you picked up the noodles in your bowl and began slurping them up with delight.
After thoroughly enjoying your meals along with each others’ presence, Yae shifted in her seat to face you.
“Oh yes, one part I failed to mention,” she recalled “The reason I invited you to eat and speak with me on this matter.”
“You didn’t just want my input?” You asked her. She shook her head and giggled.
“No, I had something else in mind,” she started explaining “I wanted to see what it was really like, being in a relationship with a woman, solely to assist with  writing these two characters. What do you think?”
“You’re not proposing–” You were taken aback, absolutely shocked by what the kitsune was insinuating. Your face turned a bright red and she smirked at this physical response.
“Only for the purpose of writing this story. After all, I can split the sales with you if that’s a motivator of yours.” She proposed.
“No, no! I’m not money-hungry for anything, I’m just–” You shook your head and waved your hands, but she interrupted the oncoming explanation. She already knew.
“I know, I know. This is completely uncalled for and it concerns you that I proposed this out of the blue. Truly I understand,” Yae sympathized, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder “You have all the right to reject this offer. I will not force you to assist me, but I’d very much like it if you did.”
“I…” you tried to speak, but couldn’t muster up the words. While yes, this was quite uncalled for, you weren’t uncomfortable. Flattered, maybe, but not shifting and squirming because you wanted to leave. Only because this was quite sweet, in some weird way. She said it was fake but sincerity was sprinkled in her voice.
“I… I have decided… I will help you with this investigation of yours.” You accepted, turned away from her out of embarrassment.
“Are you certain? You look like you're quite bashful and unsure.” She asked to confirm, and you faced her.
“Miss Yae, all due respect, who in their right mind would reject an opportunity like this?” You deadpanned, causing her to giggle in response.
“I suppose you have a point.”
“So does this mean…?” You asked, raising an eyebrow. She nodded and smirked.
“Hopefully we’ll make the best of partners, my dear Y/N.” She cooed as she handed the man behind the counter a pouch of mora. She then proceeded to get up and offer her arm. You got up and grasped her forearm and smiled up at her. 
“Shall I walk you home?” She offered, a loving smile on her lips. You nodded and averted your eyes shyly.
“Yes, Miss Yae.” You grinned from ear to ear. You’d cover your face if you could. A feeling was boiling in your chest and you had no idea what it was. Not anxiety, not fear, but admiration? No. Too soon. That couldn’t possibly be it. It’s only been minutes.
“Alright, lead the way,” She said as you two headed out of the restaurant and into the beautiful night.
This is all just for the sake of inspiration, right? Then why does it feel so real?
A/N: Hi guys! I've had this idea in my brain forever and if you want the whole story (I haven't finished the second chapter yet lol), I will be regularly updating it on Wattpad! This post is the first chapter and the link below is the same thing but if you'd like to support the book, it'd mean a lot! <3
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gemwolfz · 8 months ago
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see my problem is that if you say hole with little enough context i will immediately start laughing anyway. Hole. What the fuck hes digivolving
Ohhhhhhhh if i had a nickel for every time keroro was possessed by ass demons i would have two nickels wh
ASS STABBING VAMPIRISM!!!!!!! YEAH SURE OKAY WHY NOT!!!!!!!!
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you know what they say about guys with two horns. uh. um. Someone finish this joke for me
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now thats just being dealt a bad hand. at least youre truest to a mole (cant fucking see). Giroro is still down there he could jump out at any moment kids evacuate please please please
guys i swear to god theres a voice clip of super smash bros GAME SET mixed to say GAY SEX but its nowhere to be found whenever i need it. its so clear in my head but i cant fucking reference it. god dammit.
Put mois away i dont wanna see that shit
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i like how they act like this would help at all as though keroro wasnt drilling directly through walls a minute ago. you guys are stupid GIRORO YOU CANT JUST SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! His deliberation implies they still have some degree of free will are you guys just doing this for fun or BOING????????? BOING SOUND EFFECT??????????????????????????????????? BOIIINGGGG!!!!
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sorry im laughing uncontrollably WRITERS PLEASE DIRECT YOUR COMEDY SOMEWHERE MORE APPROPRIATE HONKA HONKA AWOOGA BOING
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he literally got dealt a bad hand. he cannot succeed at drilling holes. he cant fucking see. sad i guess. Kururu CELIBACY image
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KOGORO!!!!!!!!! KOGORO ASS JUMPSCARE!!!!!!!!!!!! KOGORO MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER ALL THE TIME wrong. he made things a little worse. uh. ah. hm.
PURURU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HI PURURU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the only one allowed to stick pointy things in yalls asses has arrived
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i. yeah sure okay that tracks. giroro deepthroated that thing btw if you care
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Review really cool you guys are going to get the most horrendous doodles once i watch the chibikero ep.
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polutrope · 1 year ago
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Oh my God Daemags + ice skating pretty please?
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Here you are @imakemywings and @i-did-not-mean-to! 1.1k words of everyone's favourite nerdy gays. No warnings other than a couple soft expletives and one suggestive remark. Context: In this AU, Daeron is Luthien's brother. Daemag have the "And they were roommates" arc. This is about 6 months into their romantic relationship.
“I think we should go on a date.”
Daeron stilled the chopsticks supporting a cascade of rice noodles over his steaming bowl of pho and wrinkled his nose. “Isn’t this a date?”
“Like an actual date. This is just us being too lazy to cook.”
“Dates are expensive.”
“I’ll pay for it.”
“Oh no no. I told you I don’t like it when you get all charitable.” Daeron glared and lifted the noodles to his mouth. “I have money,” he grumbled around a slurp.
“Great,” said Maglor, exasperation mounting, “then why do you care if it’s— never mind. I thought we could go skating at Ivrin Square.”
“Skating?” Daeron’s face twisted in disapproval. “Oh come on Mags, that is so silly. Not to mention what a waste of energy it is cooling the ice… you know temperatures are 3 degrees above average this winter?”
Maglor reached across the table and smacked his boyfriend’s arm affectionately. “Get over yourself, Dae-bae. I’m taking you skating and you’re gonna have fun.”
*
Shrieks of glee and the scrape of blades against ice filled the square as a crowd of skaters looped round and round the large Christmas tree in the middle of the rink.
“Someone is definitely going to crash into that thing,” said Daeron, tipping his chin in the direction of the tree. “Dammit, these things are so uncomfortable!” He shoved a foot into his rental skate.
Maglor snugged Daeron’s scarf around his neck and pulled him forward for a kiss. Daeron made a sound of protest but didn’t push him off. “It’s a good thing you’re so cute when you’re cranky,” said Maglor, then affecting a posh British accent, “Dost thou require help with thy boot, Prince Daeron?”
Daeron snorted. As he laced up his skate, he muttered teasingly, “You’re such a nerd.”
“So says renowned local history podcaster Daeron Singh-Goel! Oh, and please remind me which of us studies Aramaic on work time?”
“Akkadian, not Aramaic.” Daeron tied a bow on his second skate. “I’ve told you this like a hundred times.”
“Whatever, they’re both equally dead.” Daeron opened his mouth to protest but Maglor leapt up, dragging Daeron with him. “You ready?”
They shuffled awkwardly to the rink entrance. “So,” said Maglor, bracing himself with one arm on either side of the gate, “when was the last time you went skating?”
“Uuh, I dunno, Lúthien dragged me to Aelin Uial when it froze over last winter. Maybe February? Why?”
“Mmhm. And are you… good at it?”
“I mean I know how to stop and skate backwards and stuff.”
“Cool.” He slipped Daeron a smile and grasped for his hand. “Come on, then!”
“Maglor. Do you know how to skate?”
“Sure!” Maglor fixed an enthusiastic grin on his face. “How hard can it be?”
“Oh my god,” Daeron said, as he was dragged onto the ice. Almost immediately, he was straining to hold Maglor upright.
“I can’t believe you don’t know how to skate!” Daeron shouted, guiding Maglor to brace himself on the flimsy plexiglass fencing. “This was your idea!”
“Yeah, and I know how much you love being better than me at something.” Maglor yanked him into am embrace. “See? I’m already holding myself up.”
“I am holding you up,” Daeron said, “which is really not easy considering you’re half a foot taller.”
“More than half a foot, I think. Come on, Dae, show me your fancy tricks.”
Daeron groaned, but slid his hands down Maglor’s arms to clasp both hands, then began to slowly pull him backwards. “All right, good. No, no! Keep your feet together. Yes, like that, toes in. No, not that in. And look at something that’s not moving— no, don’t look at me.”
“You love this,” Maglor whispered.
Daeron ignored him. “All right, we’re gonna turn now, easy. Just keep your weight balanced— wait, no!— aaahh! Ow!”
In an instant, they were horizontal on the hard ice, Maglor laughing gleefully and Daeron sputtering a string of curses that only made Maglor laugh harder, especially considering the number of small children dodging them.
“You did that on purpose!” Daeron cried, scrambling to one knee. “Get up, get up!” He yanked Maglor to a seated position. “That’s dangerous! We have knives on our feet. Get up! And stop laughing like a madman, someone is going to think we’re drunk.”
But no one seemed to be under that impression as far as Maglor could tell. The other skaters wobbled and glided past them with amused smiles. “Fine, fine,” he said. “I’ll do better staying up for you.”
“Oh my god.” Daeron rolled his eyes. “Are you drunk?”
“Of course not. I’m just having fun.”
Daeron took both his hands and looked at him with resigned affection. “You’re so crazy. Come on,” he held out an arm to act as leverage, “get up.”
It was only once upright that Maglor registered the smarting of his hip and knee, so he stuck to the sidelines for a while after that. Daeron, as predicted, could not resist the temptation to show off a little. Maglor smiled as he swooped past him, throwing in the occasional flourish with his arms. And as it turned out, once you got the hang of it, skating round and round wasn't that difficult.
It was also rather boring after about ten minutes, and Maglor found himself singing along to the carols blasting on the speakers.
“You know I can hear you all the way on the other side,” Daeron said, sliding up beside him.
Maglor raised his voice in answer. “A beautiful night, we’re happy tonight, walking in a winter wonderland.”
A passer-by whooped and clapped. “All right!”
“…to sing a love song, while we stroll along…” Maglor reached for Daeron’s hand.
“Now you’re showing off,” Daeron said.
“Come on, Dae, I need a harmony— He’ll say, ‘are you married?’, we’ll say, ‘no man, but you can do the job when you’re in town!’”
Daeron pursed his lips in a way that said he was trying very hard to resist joining in.
“Later ooon, we’ll conspire, as we dreeeam by the fire, to face unafraid, the plans that we’ve made.”
Daeron relented, and together they chorused the last lines: “Walking in a winter wonderland.”
A family on the sidelines cheered and applauded. No more able to resist the draw of an audience than Maglor was, Daeron smirked and guided Maglor in a cautious twirl.
They both laughed as Maglor narrowly avoided another fall.
“So, are you having fun?” Maglor asked.
Daeron huffed and said, “Yeah, yeah. I guess,” then gave Maglor a quick kiss before gliding backwards and launching spiritedly into the next song.
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cactusnymph · 1 year ago
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holding hands 33 with the moon gays?
This is silly.
She's a cleric, Isobel is a cleric, Aylin is a paladin, somewhere over on the other side of the camp Halsin and Jaheira are drinking wine together and both of them have healing spells and yet here she sits cross-legged in front of Aylin while she bandages Shdowheart's hand.
"Hold still", Aylin demands and Shadowheart would love nothing more than to get up and walk away but apparently this thing's bite is poisonous and seeing as to how two of her fingers already turned a nasty shade of purple she probably shouldn't.
"I'll have my spells back after I trance for four hours", she says, pressing the words through her teeth. It is a constant battle to be touched gently like this, especially by someone as attractive as Aylin. Shadowheart doesn't want to think about how hot Aylin is or how beautiful Isobel is or how the two of them look at each other as if they hung the literal moon.
Shadowheart snorts about her own thoughts, staring upwards at the full moon in the sky. Surely it must be a cruel trick of fate to send her two Selûnite worshippers who are not only ridiculously in love with each other but are both so infuriatingly attractive that Shadowheart can't help but stare.
She tries to be secretive about it, that's her whole job. But Isobel especially is so damn perceptive. Her smirk will haunt Shadowheart forever.
Aylin's big, calloused hands are so gentle with her wound even though she herself looks terribly banged up from their earlier combat. Isobel is already asleep after almost dying earlier and Aylin had insisted... well.
"You fight well", Aylin says while she carefully cleans and disinfects Shadowheart's wound before grabbing a bandage.
"Thanks", Shadowheart says, trying her best to sound flippant in the face of this earnest compliment. It shouldn't make her heart skip a beat. She shouldn't enjoy this. She really, really shouldn't. "So do you, I suppose."
Aylin looks up at her with an unreadable expression before turning back to the bandage.
"You don't like it when people help you", she says softly. Shadowheart looks away and huffs.
"Who likes to be weak?", she answers. The fingers of her free hand are digging into her thigh so much that it starts hurting. Good. The pain is good and clears her mind.
"Seeking help is not weakness, daughter of darkness", Aylin says. Shadowheart wonders why she's even helping her--they should be enemies, just like their goddesses.
"Being dependent on other people is weakness", Shadowheart argues and Aylin smiles. It makes Shadowheart's skin tingle and her heart stumble. Gods dammit.
"No one can be strong on their own all the time. It is good to ask others for help and admit weakness from time to time. You will learn this eventually, I am sure", Aylin says and fastens the bandage around Shadowheart's hand.
There is a moment when the bandage is fastened and Shadowheart should pull her hand away. But she doesn't. Time seems to slow down as she stares at the point of their connection, her slender, pale hand in Aylin's way bigger hand, her knuckles bloodied and her palm dirty.
Aylin holds her hand there and Shadowheart does not pull away.
She looks up swallows heavily when her eyes meet Aylin's.
"You can always call on me for help if you need it", she says earnestly, her face open and honest and Shadowheart hates it, hates Aylin, hates the moon and Isobel and Selûne and most of all she hates herself for how weak her knees feel and how desperately she wants to keep holding on.
She pulls her hand away.
"I can take care of myself", she says and gets up to walk over to her bedroll, her hand still burning from Aylin's soft touch.
feel free to send me more of these <3
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thelostgirl21 · 9 months ago
Text
A collection of unsent drafts that Radovid, Comma Prince, has written over the last 20+ years...
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Dear Jaskier,
I think your music is phenomenal and filled with homoerotism...
I totally blame you for my sexual awakening...
Please do me?
---
Dear Jaskier,
Are you gay?
Would you like to be?
I could show you!
Gods, I'm hopeless...
---
Dear Jaskier,
Is it wrong to want to be stuck in the middle of a bard / Witcher sandwich?
---
Dear Jaskier,
Do you think one can fall in love with someone through their songs?
Because yours are filled with so much beauty, poetry, symbolism and inner truths, that I think you have one of the most beautiful, intriguing, and beguiling spirits I've ever seen...
Or heard...
Actually, indirectly heard since I've never had the pleasure of hearing your voice.
I mean, I've heard your voice through your songs - as in the things you wish to say through your lyrics! Just not "your voice" as in... Ah, the sound coming from the vibrations of your vocal cords?
Gods dammit!
---
Dear Jaskier,
Would you believe I've a master in the 7 liberal arts, too?
And in the art of being a gay disaster, apparently...
---
Dear Jaskier,
Penis.
---
Dear Jaskier,
I thought writing it down would take my mind off it.
Spoilers alert: it didn't.
Penis, cock, dick...
Ah, fuck it!
---
Dear Jaskier,
After his fifth attempt to find me a princess to marry, I finally told my brother that I'm gay, and now he's pissed!
Apparently, they were all really counting on me to have kids since Hedwig can't give him an heir, and now I've ruined all of his and Dijkstra's brilliant plans!
Fuck, I hate Dijkstra so much...
At least Philippa has the decency of looking fabulous!
I'm telling you, that mage really slays!
Probably literally, too...
Yeah, on second thought, not sure that's such a good thing...
---
Dear Jaskier,
So, apparently my brother has forgiven me for ruining his plans of succession, since it's not like it's going to be his problem to deal with!
Yeah, after "much thinking on his part", it has finally occurred to him that heirs are only useful once you're dead, so he's never going to have any use for them!
Therefore, I should feel free to" waste as much royal seed as I want!"
Gods, I hate him so much, sometimes...
Although, that means I won't have to marry a princess, right?
---
Dear Jaskier,
Marry me?
---
Dear Jaskier,
I had a moment of weakness, and asked Philippa to find out where you were from and...
You're a Viscount?!?!
Oh my fucking Gods, I can't believe you're a Viscount!!!
Look, I'd totally have wanted to marry you regardless of any titles of nobility, but this makes things so much easier!
You see, Mom was a Baronness!
So, if Dad was allowed to marry a Baronness, and my brother chose to get married to a barren Princess, I'd like to see anyone try to tell me I can't marry a Viscount!
---
Dear Jaskier,
So, I asked Vizimir if I could get married to a Viscount, and he rolled his eyes at me, dramatically said "fine!", then asked "where the fuck is Lettenhove?"
Where the fuck is Lettenhove?
---
Dear Julian Alfred Pankratz,
Julian is actually kinda pretty, you know, although I can see why you'd want to choose a more personalized name, given your career as an artist...
Jaskier suits you.
Fuck, I've never actually met or spoken to you, but I've already decided that Jaskier suits you?
I'm hopeless!
---
Dear Jaskier,
I heard your new song and I'm so, so sorry...
I think I'm still a bit in shock over it...
I mean, how long has it been between you two? Twenty years?
And he just...
Look, I have no words!
How could he?!?!
Spent the whole dinner last night crying in my fucking soup, to the point I actually got my brother worried.
Tried to pretend I'd been reading this really tragic romance novel, but he didn't look too convinced.
He'll probably have Philippa breathing down my neck for a few days to make sure I'm okay...
Is there anything I could do to help you feel better?
I'm guessing you mean "burn" figuratively, and you wouldn't actually want me to ask my brother to arrest him and have him burn on a pyre, right?
Right?
Because we've got at least one of those...
---
Dear Jaskier,
Our bard sang the song again, and I had to excuse myself to from the room for a moment.
I know I said I wanted to marry you, but not like this!
I don't want you to have to give up on those you love for me to be with you.
I just... I just wish I could hopefully bring you even more love and happiness in your life...
Does that make any sense?
---
Dear Jaskier,
Just to be clear, that was just the anger, heartbreak and disappointment talking. I would never actually use my position to have Geralt of Rivia killed nor harmed in any way!
Unless you were to clearly ask me to...
Hurt him a bit for you, that is.
But, just so you know, I draw the line at any form of dismemberment or permanent maiming!
---
Dear Jaskier,
So, rumor has it the bastard has finally apologized, and you two have been spotted traveling together again?
Good.
He better treat your right.
---
Dear Jaskier,
How dare you?!
How fucking dare you?!
First, I am pleased to confirm that I was a hundred percent right, and "Jaskier" truly does suit you.
But sweet Melitele! You have no right to be so good looking, hot, and adorable at the same time!
What even was that curtsy-bow... ah, bounce?
You're just like I imagined, and nothing like I could ever have imagined, and, fuck... you're perfect!
Your voice even seems to sing when you are talking! How is that possible?
What I wouldn't give to actually listen to you perform one of your songs...
---
Dear Jaskier,
And just like that, we are back to penis.
---
Dear Jaskier,
I still can't find the words...
It was...
You are...
I am...
Fuck.
I am yours, is what I am!
I can't find the words, but I still remember every single one of yours...
Every one of them, right down to their very melody...
Been harassing our bard to teach me to play it...
Sadly, helping you won't be as easy as you make it sound; Philippa's started figuring out I'm not as clueless as I pretend to be, and from her sudden interest in me, I fear she might be misinterpreting my intents.
Still, I just want to make good on my word, and find a way to keep you and your family safe, Jaskier...
I need you to be safe...
Hopefully, Dijkstra and Philippa can convince my brother to reconsider his deal with Nilfgaard. After all, it's not like Vizimir ever would listen to me when it comes to making political decisions.
I'm way too much of an idealist and bleeding heart, according to him...
Still, I don't get why no one in this place seems to understand the value of win-win scenarios...
---
Dear Jaskier,
The good? My brother has been convinced. If she comes to Redania, Ciri will be fiercely kept and protected from Nilfgaard.
The bad? Convincing him involved a tiny bit of regicide, and I can't tell my brother about it, else I might end up a little dead, too.
Say, I hear your Witcher has a thing for adopting royals... think he'd adopt me?
Hopefully, once Vilgefortz has been exposed as a spy and a traitor to the Brotherhood, all this madness will stop; and we'll be able to catch and get rid of Rience once he looses access to his master's resources and protection.
I swear, I never expected things to get that bad, Jaskier... But I'll find a way to fix this. I have to.
Maybe if I can convince Ciri to come to Redania with your Witcher and his Sorceress, the combined power of Cintra and its allies with the North will he enough to stay Nilfgaard's hand, a second war will be averted, Dijkstra and Philippa will finally leave me alone, your debt to them will be considered paid in full, and perhaps your family can help change the way Redania has been ruling things as of late...
Yeah, I'd like to see Dijkstra and Philippa think they can get away with bullying your Witcher, a Witcher trained Princess, and two of the most powerful magic users of the Continent.
Of course, there's no guarantee Ciri would even want to listen to me, but I've got to try, at least.
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summerwritesfics · 10 months ago
Text
🏢I Wanna, I Wanna Stay ‘Til The End, Chapter 2 - However Long You Stay Is All That I Am
Pairing: Rain/Kuai Liang Length: 6361 Words Rating: Explicit 🔞 Warnings: Neighbours AU, Modern AU, Friends With Benefits, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Self-Esteem Issues, Medical Procedures, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Past Cheating, Cockblocking (especially relevant in this chapter LMFAO), Anxiety, Eventual Smut, Is it slowburn if the sex is fast but the emotions are slow, Minor Tanleena, 70% of this fic is me cockblocking Rain
I Wanna, I Wanna Stay ‘Til The End Masterlist
Notes: Hurray! Another chapter of another fic I havn’t updated in a while 😭 I’m doing it guys. Heads up, this chapter does have some discussion of past domestic abuse and past infidelity, but it’s kind of still tame atm. As a note before anyone leaves me a comment about it, I am aware that as of MK1 Rain has been given an actual name. I will however, still be referring to him as Ranjit for this story. I already started with that name and I don’t want to change it now. Chapter Title is from “All The Same” by Sick Puppies.
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“Rule one of the getting laid guidebook, don't try to fuck someone who has something in the oven.” Mileena sat back in her chair, putting her feet up on the desk. “Rule two, don't have your phone with you, and if you do, don't answer it.”
Rain glared at her, head on the desk. The report had taken him far longer than he'd liked. He hoped to get it done quickly and then return to Kuai's apartment again. He was so close, Kuai was even fighting whatever anxieties he had and flirting back. But by the time he finished the report it was 3am, and somehow he doubted a booty call at that time would go down well, no matter how into it Kuai was.
“Hey, look at the bright side,” Tanya started and Rain aimed his scowl at her now, because what bright side? “You know he's gay, single and, for reasons I can't fathom, down to fuck you.”
Rain stuck his tongue out at her. She had a point though. Kuai was flustered by Rain coming on so strong, but seemed open to it. He flirted back. He looked genuinely disappointed when Rain had to leave. God fucking dammit a hot guy was going to fuck him and then the universe decided to cockblock him. That seemed fucking typical.
“Are you three actually working or are you just having a circle jerk?”
Rain sat up. His glare now on Reiko, standing in the doorway and looking at the three of them with disgust. Why the hell Shao Kahn continued to hire him, Rain had no idea, especially given what he did to Mileena while they were dating.
“Don't you have to be a douchebag somewhere else?” Tanya hissed, and it was obvious she was trying to resist the urge to walk over there and punch him. Rain wouldn't hold her back if she did.
“Don't you have work to be doing?” Reiko sneered back. Rain clenched his jaw as Reiko's gaze landed on him. “Sorry to hear your plans didn't go ahead last night.” Rain snorted, how long had Reiko been listening in to know the details? “Guy must be pretty desperate though if he considered fucking you.”
It was one thing for Tanya to tease him about something like that, but Reiko's tone made it clear this wasn't just friendly ribbing. This was malicious. It was quite frankly gross, how Reiko tried to tear him down for daring to side with Mileena after the breakup. Like Reiko wasn’t the cause of it in the first place.
“Sounds like you're jealous no one wants to touch you,” Tanya snapped back. He wanted to tell her that stooping to Reiko's level wasn't exactly the best idea.
“That's not what your girlfriend thought.” And that was why engaging seemed like a bad move. Mileena was shrinking into her seat, looking like she did not want to be here. Tanya looked like she was about to rip Reiko's head off.
“You know what, my personal life is none of your business,” Rain interrupted, hoping to god he could put an end to the argument before it really got ugly. The last thing they needed was being reprimanded for getting into a physical brawl in the office.
“Maybe you shouldn't talk about it so loudly then.” Okay being the bigger person really isn’t working. Of course it wouldn’t when the person you’re trying to put yourself above was such a condescending asshole. “I really don't want to know the details of some old guy you're going to swindle into having sex with you.”
“Then put your hands over your ears and walk away, no one's forcing you to listen.” Rain tried to ignore the weird twist of doubt now in his head. Swindle into having sex... Was he swindling Kuai into having sex with him? What did that even mean in this context?
“Whatever, I hope the guy figures you out before he gets himself hurt.”
Rain didn't get a chance to retort before Reiko disappeared, turning his back on them and leaving the room. He gave an annoyed sigh, shaking his head as he turned back to look at his friends. Tanya still looked ready to gut someone, while Mileena was staring down at her hands.
“You okay, Milly?” He asked, and Tanya's anger finally faded as she turned to her girlfriend.
Mileena looked up at them and gave a forced smile, “yeah. Let's just pretend that didn't happen.”
Rain wanted to agree except that nagging doubt was back. Mileena and Tanya were his best friends, but didn't coddle him. If he asked if they thought he was in some way tricking Kuai Liang, they would tell him their truthful opinion.
“Do... Do you guys think I'm 'swindling' Kuai to sleep with me?” He asked. He didn't particularly like the look the pair shared.
“I mean, you do seem a little preoccupied with sleeping with him, rather than getting to know him,” Mileena said, rubbing the back of her head.
“I can be interested in sleeping with him and getting to know him,” he argued. “Those two things aren't mutually exclusive.”
“I just think you need to talk to him first, see what he wants from this,” Tanya advised. “I mean he's what? A single 40 year old man? He's probably more interested in someone he can settle down with, rather than rampant sex.”
Rain hadn't really considered that. He'd been so distracted by the fact Kuai was hot and gay he hadn't really thought about what the other man could potentially be looking for in a relationship. Maybe he just wanted someone to fool around with too. But maybe it was like Tanya said and he'd want something serious. Rain wanted something casual, but that didn't mean everyone else did.
“Just be careful,” Mileena said, “he seemed really anxious, and if you aren't on the same page about this, it could really hurt him.”
Rain was a bit of a fuckboy, he openly admitted that, but he never really intended to hurt anyone. Maybe I need to slow it down a bit. 
“Alright, I'll see if I can talk to him.” He wasn't sure if he should do it before or after he had sex with him. He'd just see how things went the next time he saw him, he guessed.
“Good, until then though, we should probably get to work before someone who isn't dickface comes and yells at us,” Tanya said, picking up a pile of paper on her desk. “Did you want to go over the newest marketing pitch again before I send it off?”
“Yeah we should do that,” he agreed, although he knew that part of him would be thinking about the man living opposite to him, and how to figure out what he wants from a relationship.
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Kuai hummed to himself walking down the street. It had been a good day. He'd managed to get a good chunk of the first draft done, spoken to Johnny about the scripting of the next book-turned-movie, and managed to get his bubble tea order in one take without stumbling over his words. It seemed a little silly to call that last one a win, but when you were used to always saying the wrong things, getting things right seemed like an accomplishment.
He had mostly been able to put the night before to the back of his mind too. He had thought about it though, while he sat in the park and drank his bubble tea. He really needed to figure out what Rain wanted.
Well, other than sex because that much was completely obvious.
It seemed like Rain wasn't looking for serious commitment. Just because that was how it appeared didn't mean that was what was really going on.
He'd been committed for 15 years, rushed into marriage at 20 and never really knew what it was like to not be in a long term relationship. And look what that had given him? Nothing but pain, emotional and physical. He was still healing from what had happened to him. He wouldn't rush into another serious relationship, he wouldn't let himself be hurt like that again.
He didn't think that Rain would do terrible things to him, but then he hadn't believed his husband would either. The possibility was terrifying to him.
If they could keep things casual in some way, he would appreciate it.
As he approached the apartment, he noticed the very man he needed to talk to was at the door. He looked like he was trying to figure out the trick with the door. The door clicked open and he gave a loud cheer as he did.
“I'm the best around! Nothings ever gonna keep me down!” He sang triumphantly, pumping his fist as he did. It was very endearing.
Kuai bit his knuckle to try and stop himself from laughing. Unfortunately, he snorted very loudly as a result, and Rain's head snapped around. He looked extremely embarrassed that Kuai had just seen that.
“Oh uh. You saw that, huh?” Rain sucked in a breath as he rubbed the back of his head.
“Don't worry, the secret of your dorky side is safe with me,” Kuai teased, trying not to grin. Rain gave a sheepish smile before holding the door open for him. Kuai thanked him as he slipped inside.
“So, I was actually hoping I'd catch you,” Rain finally said, following Kuai over to the elevator. “Given that I still owe you for the cakes, and I was thinking about ordering takeout tonight, I was wondering if you cared to join me?”
Huh. I wasn't expecting that. Maybe he had been wrong about Rain just wanting something casual. Or... was just having a meal together still considered casual? Kuai really didn't have enough experience with dating to be able to say.
Still, I can't really go wrong with free food, can I? 
“That does sound good,” Kuai answered with a smile, just as the elevator doors opened. “What did you have in mind?”
“Maybe a Chinese or pizza, whichever you prefer.” Rain lent against the wall of the elevator and the smile he wore made him look so handsome Kuai had to physically restrain himself from swooning.
“I could definitely go for a pizza right now,” Kuai replied, brushing his hair out of his eyes. He bit his lip. “I was hoping to talk to you, actually.”
“Huh, no kidding?” Rain hummed, pursing his lips. “There was something I was hoping to talk to you about too.” He grimaced slightly, “although it's a little personal, and we should probably wait until we're in my apartment.”
Strange. But Kuai smiled still and answered “ah, what I wanted to talk about may be better for a private place too then.”
Rain looked like he wanted to ask, but then the doors opened, and the subject was dropped and they exited as Rain asked “so, how was work today?”
“Pretty well, actually,” Kuai replied, “I made good progress on a couple of my current projects.”
Rain pursed his lips, “I don't think I've actually asked what you do for your job?”
He was right, now that Kuai thought about it. Between the questions they had asked each other and the growing sexual tension between them, the nature of their work life hadn't really come up.
“I'm a writer,” he explained, trying to figure out how in depth he wanted to go. He was well known, although not to the level of being stopped in the street like Johnny was. But at the same time, a few of his books had been made into blockbuster movies. “Currently working on a first draft of my next novel, as well as helping a friend with scripting a movie based on one of my others.”
He maybe shouldn't have mentioned the last bit when he noticed how wide Rain's eyes had gone.
“Wait, one of your books is being turned into a movie?” Rain sounded completely astonished. Even as he got his key out and tried to put it in his lock he was still looking at Kuai.
“Technically it's the third to be adapted,” Kuai admitted sheepishly. He didn't usually talk much about the movies. Not because they were bad or for lack of involvement, they were actually fairly faithful and he was involved every step of the journey.
No, it was more because after learning just who was involved, people suddenly were a lot less interested in Kuai Liang and far more interested in using him to meet world famous actor Johnny Cage.
Johnny was understanding. The last thing he wanted was Kuai being hurt because someone had carelessly used him as a gateway into fame.
“Wow, holy shit, that's amazing,” Rain stated, finally looking away long enough to actually get his key in the lock. “My brother is an actor.” Kuai felt a little apprehensive. He'd heard “my family members an actor, can you get them a part” before. Kuai still followed Rain into his apartment regardless. “Well... He's been in movies... as an extra.” Rain sighed as he shut the door behind Kuai and threw his keys onto a little table beside the door. “Although the way my family talks about him, you'd think he was Johnny fucking Cage.”
Kuai laughed nervously, partially at the mention of his dear friend, and partially because Rain's tone sounded extremely bitter. I get the feeling things aren't good with his family relationships. Still at least Rain wasn't pushing to know more about the films, or if Kuai could get his brother a better role in future ones.
“So, you never told me what you do?” Kuai tried to divert the conversation as he looked around the room. Observing at Rain's furniture, he suddenly understood the comment about Kuai's matching. There was such a mismatch of different styles and patterns.
If he was completely honest it was all extremely hideous but he knew that was just his personal opinion and definitely not a welcome one.
“Oh. Uh, nothing as exciting as you, by the sounds of it,” Rain replied, walking over to a drawer in his living room, and rooting through it. “I'm a Sales and Marketing executive.” He pulled out a pizza takeaway menu. “I'm basically behind a bunch of adverts and selling our products to clients, y'know basically making sure people actually want to buy our stuff.”
“I don't know, I think that sounds extremely interesting,” Kuai said, accepting the menu when it was offered to him. He already knew what he wanted, but it didn't hurt to pretend to look. “The closest to a normal job I've ever had was when I was 16 and doing weekends at the gas station.”
“Huh, you must have lived the starving artist life for a while then?” Rain questioned, flopping down on the couch and patting the seat next to him.
“Ah, not really. I married my ex-husband at 20 and he was ridiculously rich.” Kuai absentmindedly sat down, eyes still on the menu, trying to make sure the pizza he wanted was still available. “I technically didn't have to work, but I got bored quickly, and began writing to keep myself entertained. Sent my first draft to a couple of publishers one day on a whim, lo and behold one of them loved it and the rest is history.”
“I- Oh. Your ex-husband?”
Kuai paused.
He hadn't even realised he'd mentioned his ex. Shit. It had been a slip up, not a major one mind, but enough to make him feel apprehensive. Because usually when he mentioned him, people immediately felt entitled to know why they split up. Kuai didn't enjoy talking about that with his therapist, let alone to people he barely knew.
“Yes I was married for 15 years,” he explained, “we divorced 5 years ago.”
“Oh, sorry to hear that,” Rain said sympathetically. “Why did you split?”
“We-“ Kuai stopped himself.
He was going to say they drifted apart but that just felt wrong to say. They didn't drift apart, Kuai just finally grew tired of the cycle. His husband berating and hurting him and then showering him with adoration and gifts. The promise that it would never happen again, only for a few days to go by and it to all start over. He would never forget the night he finally attempted to leave. He'd never forget hands on his chest, pushing at him and the sensation of falling down the stairs. He'd never forget waking up in the hospital to his husband swearing up and down Kuai had slipped and fell. He'd never forget the desperation he felt when he finally managed to slip the nurse a note that just read “he's lying, please help me”.
He took a deep breath, now was really not the time he wanted to talk about this.
“He just wasn't the man I thought I'd married,” he settled on.
Thankfully, Rain didn't seem to push for more info than that. Maybe it was clear the subject was too painful for small talk.
“Anyway,” he said with a cough, seemingly wanting to move on. “Did you decide what you want?”
“Vegi-surprise, please.” He passed the menu over to Rain, trying to smile and put the memories to the back of his mind.
“Vegetarian?” Rain questioned as he took the menu and got his phone out and started putting the number in.
“Ah, no, I just prefer vegetables on my pizza,” he explained, just before Rain put the phone to his ear.
He kept quiet as the order was made, wondering what the rest of the evening would bring.
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“I can't believe you are partially behind that jingle,” Kuai exclaimed after swallowing a mouthful of pizza. Rain had been telling him about some of his previous advertising campaigns, and a very well known and annoying jingle for Outworld Superstores he'd had a part in creating. “It was stuck in my head for months!”
“Yeah, sorry about that,” Rain said with a grin. He wasn't the person who performed or wrote the jingle, but he was the one who had suggested it and given it the green light. He had been repeatedly told it had ruined people's lives with its earworm nature.
It was weird. Rain didn't consider his job exciting at all. Not that he regretted it, just normally when he talked about the ins and outs beyond specific adverts, people tended to zone out. Kuai on the other hand seemed fascinated. And here was Rain thinking he'd be the one asking all the questions about Kuai's job.
Actually, Kuai had barely talked about his work, it was a little strange. He was accomplished enough to have movies made from his books. Surely that was something to brag about? Kuai was probably just more humble than Rain could ever be. Years of his accomplishments being completely ignored in favour of his brothers meant he felt the need to be bold and push them to the front.
Now that I put it like that, maybe that is more a me issue. 
He was sure Kuai would open up more as time went on. Both on his work and the mysterious ex-husband he mentioned. Rain wasn't an idiot, he could tell whatever caused them to split up was painful. He hadn't pushed, it wasn't his place. The only thing about it that bothered Rain was Tanya and Mileena's earlier warnings that Kuai might be looking for something more serious.
And 15 years sounded pretty fucking serious to Rain.
He turned to Kuai with the intention of finally bringing the subject up, only to stop when he saw the other man. He had a small amount of dip on the corner of his mouth.
“Ah, you uh- you've got a spot on you,” Rain informed him, tapping the corner of his mouth, as an opportunity came to his mind.
Kuai reached his hand and wiped his mouth, "is that better?"
Rain scooted forward, reaching a hand to Kuai's chin. "Here, let me~" he purred, before leaning in to kiss the other man.
So much for talking about things first. Kuai made a surprised huff, but it didn't take long for him to lean into the kiss, wrapping his arms around Rain's shoulders. Kuai opened his mouth and Rain took the chance to slip his tongue in. He was delighted to feel Kuai's tongue mingle with his own.
He began to shift, gently pushing Kuai back down against the couch. Rain's hands fumbled with Kuai's shirt, trying to undo the buttons. He released Kuai's lips, trailing kisses along his neck instead. Kuai moaned as Rain managed to brush aside Kuai's shirt. He pulled back slightly, just enough to observe the other man below him. Kuai was surprisingly fit, not too muscular, not too lean. His chest was covered in scars, some looked like they had potentially been from surgery, while the others he had no idea what could have caused them. Now was not the time to ask. He'd been so distracted by the scars, he'd barely registered that the other man's nipples were pierced.
Holy shit, how the hell does this man seem to fit every niche I’m into? 
“God, you're so fucking hot,” he muttered, before leaning down pressing his lips between the other mans pecs.
“R-Rain,” Kuai whimpered as Rain continued to kiss down Kuai's torso. He mostly followed one of the scars that seemed to go mostly down the middle. Kuai continued to make sweet little noises, even arching his back as if to push himself closer. He continued down, meeting Kuai's navel and slipping his tongue out and swirling it around the man's belly button.
Rain searched for the buttons on Kuai's jeans, undoing them before hooking his fingers in. He lightly tugged on the item of clothing and-
He jumped a mile when his door buzzer went off.
He sat up and stared at the intercom, before looking down to Kuai Liang. His face was bright red as he looked across at the thing that had interrupted them.
“S-should you get that?” Kuai asked, looking up at him while biting his lip.
“They can wait,” Rain decided, turning to settle back between Kuai's legs. He trailed his hands down Kuai's sides, leaning down about to kiss him. He stopped when the buzzer went off again. He grit his teeth, wanting to ignore it, until the buzzer started to rapidly go off, like someone was repeatedly pushing the button in quick succession. He gave an annoyed sigh as he pushed himself up. “Sorry, I'll just deal with this.”
God he was so fucking annoyed. As he got up and walked over to the intercom, he couldn't help but mentally berate whoever was on the other end.
He clicked the button and sharply answered with “Yes? What do you want?”
“Nice to talk to you too, Ranjit,” the familiar voice spoke back. Rain mentally groaned.
“What are you doing here Taven?” He reached a hand up to rub his temples. The last thing he needed was his brother coming over to pass judgement on how this place really wasn't up to scratch.
“I mean, I am your brother,” Taven replied. “But mostly I need to talk to you about something important.”
“Can't it wait? I'm kind of in the middle of something here.” He glanced over his shoulder. Kuai was sitting up on the couch, fiddling to redo his fly up. Shit shit shit. He wasn't going to let Taven ruin this for him. Not again. He thought he was done having family members walking in on him “accidentally”.
“No not really,” Taven said, sounding annoyed. Not as annoyed as I am. “The sooner you let me up there to talk, the sooner I'll be out of your hair.”
Rain made a frustrated hand movement, before dragging it down his face and finally biting out “fine, but you'd better be quick.” He hit the button that would let the door open, waiting to give Taven enough time to get through.
He turned back to find Kuai had already done up his shirt, although he was still sitting on the couch. He looked extremely embarrassed and Rain couldn't help but feel sorry for him.
“Should I leave?” Kuai asked quietly.
“No, no, it's okay. Hopefully this'll be a few minutes tops.” Rain held his hands up, hoping it might help calm Kuai down. There was a knock on his door, and he went to open it. He was rather thankful that it was just Taven on the other side.
“So, uh, this place is where you're hiding huh?” Taven said in greeting, looking around the place like he was expecting someone to jump out at him. Rain wanted to roll his eyes so badly. “Am I allowed in?”
Rain didn't want to let him in, but he supposed it would be rude not to. He reluctantly moved aside. Taven stepped in, looking around like he was trying to scope the place out. He did a bit of a double take when he spotted Kuai.
“Oh, uh, hello?” Taven sounded confused, and Kuai looked completely out of his depth.
“Hi?” Kuai squeaked out, looking desperately towards Rain for help.
“That's my neighbour, Kuai Liang, and this is my brother, Taven,” he introduced, gesturing to each of them as he spoke.
“Oh, you didn't say you had company,” Taven said, biting his lip.
“I did say I was in the middle of something,” Rain pointed out to him, trying to not just scream in frustration.
“Uh, would- would it be better if I left?” Kuai asked again, clearly getting nervous.
“Yeah, that might be for the best,” Taven said before Rain could open his mouth to reassure Kuai it was fine.
He watched as Kuai nodded in defeat, before pushing himself up and grabbing his bag. As he made his way towards the exit, he paused briefly to give Rain a small smile.
“I'll see you later,” he whispered, before turning and leaving, closing the door behind him.
Rain just glared at Taven as he growled, “well now you've cockblocked me, you might as well tell me what the fuck you want?”
Taven shook his head in shock as he muttered “coc- huh?” He blinked a few times, “oh, my god, Ranjit, you weren't actually going to have intercourse with your neighbour were you?”
“Why do you have to refer to it like that?” Rain groaned. Why can't he just call it fucking like everyone else? “Yes, I was going to fuck him, but seeing as you've kind of ruined that plan could you please tell me why you're here?”
Taven looked like he wanted to say more on the subject of Kuai Liang, but eventually settled against it when he said “Mom's birthday party is next Friday.”
“And?” Rain rolled his hand to try and get Taven to get to the fucking point already.
“Well, I've been texting you asking if you're coming, and you've just left me on read.” Much to Rain's annoyance, Taven walked over to his kitchen, and settled down on one of the stools at the breakfast bar.
“I don't know if you know this, Tav, but I've been rather busy lately,” he snarled, while flailing his arms to the apartment around him.
“So too busy to send me a one word text, but not to try and seduce your new neighbour,” Taven replied, crossing his arms. “Seriously, you've been here two days. You don't even know the guy.”
“I know he's hot and I want to fuck his brains out, the rest is none of your fucking business,” Rain argued, storming over to the kitchen counter. “As for the party, I don't know yet.”
“She's your Mom-“
“No. She's your Mom! I'm nothing to her! The only reason I'm around her is because Dad couldn't keep his cock in his pants!”
The outburst lingered in the air, thick and heavy. It was a button Rain hated being pressed, Taven knew it was and yet he still insisted on bringing it up. In Delia's defence, on some level she had tried to be a supportive step-mother to Rain. It was clear, however, that her priority lay with her biological children. He knew that on some level she resented him, the constant reminder of her husband's betrayal.
He supposed she had at least tried, unlike his father.
He closed his eyes in defeat as he mumbled out, “when is it?”
“Next Friday at 6.” Taven was still looking at his hands. “If it helps, you can bring a plus one.”
“Fine, I'll be there,” he whispered, still not closing his eyes. He had a feeling Mileena and Tanya were busy next Friday, he might have to hunt for another plus one. “And I'll be with someone.”
“Thank you.” Rain opened his eyes, and hated how genuinely grateful Taven looked. “I know she'll be happy to see you there.”
I doubt that. 
“Was there anything else?” Rain asked, rubbing his face with his hand.
“No, I guess I'll leave you be,” Taven jumped off the seat and began to walk towards the door. “But, promise me that you'll be careful with the neighbour thing?” Rain just furrowed his brow at him. “We've been here before Ranjit. You rush into things, it's great for a while and in the end everyone just gets burned because they want commitment you can't offer them.” Taven reached to place a hand on Rain's shoulder. “I know it doesn't feel like it sometimes, but I do care about you and I don't like seeing you get hurt.”
There were so many things Rain wanted to say about that, but just couldn't. He resigned himself and just said “I'll be careful.”
Taven just nodded, wishing him a final farewell and then he was thankfully gone. As he closed the door, Rain rested his forehead against the door, resisting the urge to slam his head against it repeatedly.
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Kuai sat on his couch, staring silently at his TV, despite it being turned off. He was more watching himself in the reflection. He was rubbing his fingers across his lips repeatedly, trying to soothe his nerves.
Rain had seemed very upset to see his brother. He wasn't sure if he should have stayed as a mediator, or if he'd made the right call by leaving them to it. Either way, it seemed his talk with Rain was going to have to wait. Well, not that it seemed talking was where things had been going.
It had been 5 years since Kuai last had sex. He’d thought about it a few times, but never worked up the courage. The way Rain kissed him, touched his body. He couldn’t believe how good he felt. It wasn’t until he was in that moment that he realised how much he missed that kind of intimacy. Even when he was married, that softness was limited to his ex’s good days, that man was a very selfish lover.
He didn’t want to think about that, he wanted to think about how wonderful it had felt for Rain to touch him.
So much for talking about things though. He sighed, and rubbed at his face. All it took was a kiss and I was spreading my legs for the guy. It did rather indicate that Rain was more interested in something casual, or at least, more interested in the sex aspect. If that was indeed the case, Kuai could handle that.
He jumped a mile when he heard a knock on his door. He scrambled to get up and rushed over to it. As he expected, once he opened it, there was Rain, looking extremely apologetic.
“I am so sorry,” Rain immediately told him before Kuai could even begin to utter a word. Kuai simply smiled and stepped aside to let him in.
“Don’t worry about it,” Kuai tried to assure him, shutting the door as Rain entered the apartment. He felt a flutter in his chest, realising it was probably going to be now or never in regard to that talk. “Um… So, I think now would probably be a good time to have that conversation.”
“Yeah. Yeah, you’re probably right.” Shang Tsung reached up to rub his face with his hand. “Um. Shall I go first?” Kuai nodded in confirmation. Honestly even bringing it up first was a big step for him, he didn’t think he could handle going first as well. “What exactly do you want from… whatever this is?” Rain gestured towards the both of them as he spoke.
So, we wanted to talk about the same thing. Funny. 
“That is what I wanted to discuss with you too, actually.” Kuai began to rub at his wrist, swallowing as he tried to think of how to explain. “I’ll be honest, I was hoping for something… casual.”
“Casual?” Rain asked, tilting his head. He didn’t look put off though, more hopeful if Kuai was reading him right.
“I don’t think I’m really ready for anything extremely committed.” Kuai bit his lip, trying to ignore how hard his heart was beating. Even though Rain showed no sign of being upset by this, the little voice in Kuai’s head wouldn’t stop telling him the other man was going to leave and never talk to him again over this. “I’d like a companion but not a partner… I don’t know if that makes sense?”
“No, no, that makes perfect sense.” Rain stepped forward, taking Kuai’s hand in his. “That’s what I’m wanting too. Just someone to have fun with.”
“Oh.” Kuai chuckled awkwardly. “Well now I feel stupid for being worried.”
“Pth, don’t. My friends kinda got in my head about how you’d probably want something more serious.” Rain rubbed the back on his neck and gave a handsome smile. “So, uh, something like friends with benefits good for you?”
Kuai laughed. Aren’t I a little old to be having friends with benefits? Still, it did sound nice. He didn’t really get to have the awkward early adult phase, it’d be nice to experience a little of what that would have been like. Even if he was about 20 years too late.
“Friends with benefits sounds perfect to me.”
He was surprised when Rain suddenly took hold of his hips and pulled them close. Kuai giggled as their lips almost touched.
“Well then, with that out of the way, where were we?”
Kuai felt a little bold, confidence brought on by the previous conversation, bringing his arms up and around Rain’s neck. He felt Rain pushing him backwards until his back hit the wall. How he resisted the urge to grind against him he had no idea. Rain’s lips were on his, and he opened them hoping for their tongues to meet again. He quite enjoyed that the first time.
It really should not have surprised Kuai when a ringtone started to sound from Rain’s pocket.
Rain pulled away, and grimaced. “I cannot believe this.”
“I’d have thought after yesterday, you’d have learnt to leave your phone behind,” Kuai teased a little, snorting when Rain pouted at him.
“You would have thought I'd have learnt my lesson, wouldn’t you?” He sighed and reached into his pocket, frowning at his phone. “I have to take this.”
Kuai nodded as Rain stepped back and answered the phone. He just stood and watched as the other man got more and more exacerbated. There was a part of Kuai that felt sorry for him, being interrupted yet again, but the other part of him that felt a little bitter that he hadn’t done the obvious of leaving the stupid device behind this time.
By the time Rain was done with the conversation, it was clear he was more than a little annoyed by it.
“Work?” Kuai gently asked, and Rain gave him an apologetic look.
“Unfortunately.” He grimaced and shook his head. “The universe really does not want me to fuck you.”
Kuai laughed despite the situation. It really seemed that tonight was not going to be the night again. But there would always be more opportunities.
“It’s okay, I understand.” Kuai pushed himself away from the wall, stepping forward and giving Rain a quick kiss on the cheek. “I promise I will still be here tomorrow.”
Rain nodded, not hiding the somewhat goofy smile on his face from Kuai’s display of affection.
“I will see you tomorrow,” Rain assured him, patting his arm slightly. All Kuai could do was sigh as Rain made his way back to the door.
As soon as it shut behind him, Kuai flopped backwards against the wall, letting himself slide down it and staring at the ceiling. Honestly, if he were a little more superstitious, he’d genuinely think the constant interruptions were the doing of Bi-Han’s ghost. Big brother always was very protective, and a little too distrustful of just about anyone who found Kuai attractive.
It was a shame he wasn’t there to stop Kuai from getting married. He was certain if Bi-Han were still alive, none of the terrible things that happened would have. He’d have beat the shit out of his ex the second he suspected so much as a finger had been laid on Kuai’s body.
But Bi-Han hadn’t been there, and he wasn’t here now. Kuai just had to believe that all of this wasn’t some kind of bad omen. Like the universe was trying to stop it from happening to protect him.
Not like the universe protected me before. 
He was due to see Johnny again tomorrow, and work together on the next script. He was generally pretty decent at relationship advice. Maybe I should ask him tomorrow? At least get some idea on what to expect and how to maintain the boundaries to keep them both safe.
Until then, well, the whole experience was starting to give him creative inspiration. He finally stood up, and rushed over to where his laptop was, determined to write some notes before he forgot everything he’d just experienced and felt.
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c0mmitt4xfr0g · 1 year ago
Text
Ripe - Chapter One
uhm... so basically I wrote these hoffstrahm fanfics and I wanted to post them here................ nsfw so...
fanfic tags: hoffstrahm, gay sex, anal sex, angst (but it's all better don't worry), semi public sex.
I can't think of anything else but if there's a tag I'm missing you want me to add lemme know!!
Chapter One
It was spitting rain and windy, but that wasn't why Peter felt cold. He barely felt the gusts on his skin anymore, all he could feel was the tingling sensation of goosebumps. His eyes kept going in and out of focus as he looked from the rubber mask to Mark Hoffman's face, and the surprise paced both of them.
Neither one of them recalled what street this was, but Peter was pretty sure there hadn't been a building in the middle of it, closing the alleyway. Mark hadn't known that either, and he suddenly found himself trapped, nothing but himself, Peter Strahm, and the rain in that alleyway.
The situation was ripe for the picking.
Peter was out of breath and it didn't help that he couldn't breathe for a second, air caught in his throat like he was scared to choke on it. Adrenaline coursed through his veins like a narcotic and he felt drunk as he stumbled over to Mark.
"I got you," Peter said, more to himself than to Mark, and though his voice sounded relieved, he was not.
Mark hung his head and a sigh of exhaustion left his chest as Peter grabbed his arms, turning him around. He only struggled for a moment to protect his pride, knowing that somewhere, deep inside his brain, he still had a little bit left. He wouldn't go without a fight – but that didn't mean he would fight hard.
"Aren't you gonna take me in, officer?" Hoffman snarled, and Strahm shoved him against the wall with a groan.
He had done it. He'd captured the man he'd been obsessing over for months. He had the handcuffs around his wrists, too, and the car was just around the corner.
He had his perp – now what?
Mark couldn't help the slight gasp that escaped his lips as the cold metal handcuffs were replaced with boney, calloused hands. The handcuffs clanged loudly to the pavement and Mark flinched, but then there was nothing around his wrists at all. Peter flung his hands out of his own and took a hesitant step back.
"Get the fuck outta my sight," Peter said in a low tone, but the venom in his voice was diluted with how much it shook.
Mark whipped around. "Excuse me?"
Peter was looking at him with cold, calculated wrath that was ready to burst in him, and for the first time in a long time, Mark felt fear. His lip curled like he was about to smile and his eyes were so piercing they felt like cutting ice.
"I said, get the fuck out of my sight." The silence was deafening, and even though Peter spoke so quietly Mark questioned if he heard him right, it sounded like he barked this.
Mark's eyes darted to the mask in his fist, and with a sinking feeling in his stomach, he knew that even if he ran, he had been caught. The empty threats Peter had mailed him had meant nothing but flirtation until that very moment, because now, he had proof. And there was no amount of running in the world that would reverse it.
"Is this some sort of joke? I'll turn around and you'll shoot me in the back?" Mark snapped, throwing the mask on the pavement in a moment of rage. "Are you too pussy to be in the car alone with me?"
"God dammit, Mark," he quipped, but his voice sounded so tender at his first name. "There's no point. If I throw you in jail, you'll just escape. We'll never lose a court case against you anyway."
Peter didn't leave him with a lot of options, and Mark couldn't decide if getting shot in the back or getting thrown in prison for the rest of his life was worse. He didn't look armed, and for a second, even though he felt frozen in place, he started walking.
He waited one second, two seconds, three seconds for the burning pain of a bullet entering him but there was nothing, and he looked over his shoulder, doing a double take.
He watched Peter collapse to his knees against the alley wall, sitting down. He was standing in shock. Mark couldn't believe his eyes, but he watched him pull out a cigarette, reach for the pig mask, and hold it while he smoked, not even caring if the ash got on it or not. He was looking at it almost fondly, and Mark just couldn't believe it.
"Get up, your ass is gonna get soaked," Mark said sternly, and Peter dumbly did what he said as if he hadn't noticed he was still there, or worse, watching him.
He threw his coat on the ground where he was sitting, and Peter took up all the room that he wanted, Mark sat down next to him in silence.
Peter flung the cigarette he was smoking in a puddle, and Mark watched it fizzle out, the puff of smoke disappearing into the fog.
"Why are you still here?" Peter asked, his voice rough.
He coughed, grimacing and gripping his throat, and Mark peered at the little jagged, white scar on his Adam's apple. His voice never went back to being as smooth as it had been, but if Mark had said it wasn't attractive, he would have been lying. He didn't understand why he still smoked, but part of him liked watching him do it, and Mark felt himself craving smoke more than ever before in his life.
"Because," Hoffman said childishly. "Why are you still here?"
"None of your business," Peter said.
"Actually, it is my business, since you're supposed to be chasing me," he said, hoping that maybe Peter had forgotten the memo, that he had forgotten that they completed each other like that.
It hit Mark like a tonne of bricks that this was it – their little game was over. He had come to enjoy it, come to enjoy egging him on, sending him notes like they were love letters
Strahm didn't say anything but the rain picked up, wetting his hair until it fell in front of his eyes, not bothering to fix it.
"Why don't you just take me back to the department, throw me in jail for a few days, I'll escape and then we can go right back to how things were, huh?" Mark said, nudging him with his elbow.
"I can't," he murmured, looking up at the clouds and letting raindrops pool on his eyelids. "I can't, I'm done. It'll never be the same."
"I don't understand this," Mark started. "You're a fucking FBI agent, you're supposed to be happy that you caught me. Instead you're sitting on the ground in the rain while I give you a pep talk."
"Because you took everything from me!" Peter suddenly roared, grabbing Mark's collar with a steel fist. "And now you're all I have left."
The words escaped Peter's snarling lips and he wished that he could go back just a few seconds to stop it. When had things turned that way? When did his obsession to catch Mark become his Mark obsession? Weeks, at least, probably months, and he couldn't think of anything else that would fill that void other than him.
Peter knew it was fucked up, but the only way he could cope with everything he had lost was looking to the man who had taken it from him. And now he had him right in his hands – it should've been a sweet victory, but putting him in jail was cutting out a whole chunk of his life.
Mark gave him nightmares, but he also gave him meaning, and he gave him long nights with hard-ons that he didn't know how to fix, pictures of him that he kept separated from his files, just for him, because sometimes thinking about Mark numbed the pain and gave him something else to want.
And right now all he wanted was to kiss him, watching Mark's wide eyes trace his face, probably his nose that he could never stop staring at, while Peter gazed slowly at him licking those rounded lips.
He pulled him in closer but slowly, so slow, like he was scared Mark would bite him. Mark could see what was happening but his brain couldn't make sense of it, he could only taste the cigarettes on Peter's breath and wanted to taste more.
But Mark's eyes fluttered shut as their lips met, and he couldn't help but tug on Peter's jacket, needing something to hang onto.
In a second, a chaste kiss became angry, Peter digging his fingertips into Mark's scalp hard enough to sting a little, but the only thing Mark would've done differently is tell him to pull his hair, because it hurt in the best way. Peter wasn't breathing so much as groaning into the other man's mouth.
"I need you," Peter gasped again, and Mark felt a rush of blood to his dick, the humiliation didn't help.
"Shit, that's." Hoffman couldn't finish his sentence because his words caught in his throat when Peter squeezed at his chest with his long fingers, and he gritted his teeth.
Peter moaned against Mark's lips as he groped himself through his pants, arching his legs. He knew his cock was a sharp bulge in his pants but he didn't care, didn't care how obvious it was.
In an instant, Hoffman was on his knees straddling Peter's thigh while he pressed his knee into his cock. Strahm ground into his knee, and when he returned his focus to Mark's chest, Mark moved his hand down to his cock.
"I need you too," Mark finally said, muffled against his lips.
It was the first time Mark had seen Peter so scared and excited all at once, his steel blue eyes glittering into his.
"Fucking, thank you," Peter groaned, unzipping Mark's pants before his own. "I don't have lube."
Mark leaned down, and spat on Peter's cock, wiping his mouth with something like a glare. "There. No more excuses."
Peter slowly looked up at him in disbelief. "Fucking disgusting," Peter said. "I'm obsessed with you."
"I know you are," Mark said, but when he saw Peter suck two of his fingers into his mouth, he stopped him. "Don't bother."
Peter hesitated. "But-"
"I don't care if it hurts," Mark wheezed, but then, "just, distract me."
Peter didn't understand why he didn't let him just split him open, but he didn't mind so much, because he really did feel like he was going to burst any second.
He guided his cock into Mark's ass with one hand and gripped Mark's with his other, thumbing at his slit. It made Mark wince, but if it wasn't a good distraction from the pain of stretching around him with nothing other than a little spit to help, he wasn't sure what was.
Peter let his head roll back, squeezing his eyes shut and then blinking rapidly, a trembling gasp escaping him.
"Fucking- Mark, you're so tight," he grunted, stroking him the best he could with a shaking hand. "You're sure?"
"Shut up, just shut up for a sec," Mark snapped, his brows furrowed in deep concentration.
His teeth were gritted in pain and Peter gave him a dubious look, not sure if he should keep touching his cock or not. When he started fucking his cock with his fist, Mark let out a gasp that he'd been holding, and it seemed to ease his tension. Mark let his head sink forward and his hair fell messily over his eyes, but Peter fixed it, pushing it back, slick with the rain.
After a moment, Mark sank fully onto Peter's cock, his ass on his thighs. Mark was heavy, but Peter was strong. Strahm couldn't help but grunt as Mark sank onto him, because he was so, so tight, and warm, and he was pretty sure he was going to break his dick off but he didn't ever want to stop.
"Christ," Mark said through gritted teeth, eyes still closed and his hands still on Peter's shoulders for stability. "Gonna break me in half."
"I told you we should-"
"Shut up," Mark said, quieter this time. "I didn't say it was a bad thing."
Mark pulled off of him for a second to get situated, and when he slowly slipped onto Peter again, he started bouncing. His legs were trembling but it wasn't from a lack of strength, because the adrenaline rush made him stronger than he ever had been before.
Strahm moaned raggedly, his hand on Mark's round hip. "Beautiful," he murmured, and he could see the redness creep over Mark's calm complexion.
"Jesus, you really are obsessed with me," Mark teased, but bit his lip hard when Strahm thumbed at his head again.
He forgot that just a few moments ago, he had been burning, because the only thing he could think about now was how to stop himself from blowing his load embarrassingly fast.
"I didn't have a choice," Peter said, running his hand over his shoulder blades. "Mm, feels so good, baby."
Mark felt his eyes burn and gloss over when Peter started thrusting into him to meet his pace, feeling his voice start to tremble.
"I'm gonna come fast if you keep doing that," Mark admitted, his hand resting on Peter's chest.
"Good," he said. "I want you to."
"You just want to embarrass me," Mark said, but he could barely get it out in more than a whine, and he hiccupped.
Peter put his knees up and it forced him deeper into Mark, making him swear, his grip on Peter's shoulders tightening with every animal thrust.
"You… took everything from me," Peter grunted in his ear, sinking all the force he had into fucking him.
"I know," Mark stammered, his voice wet because he was almost crying. "You're my everything."
"You too," Peter gasped. "I need you, a-ah, think about it everyday, I think I fucking love you-"
Mark suddenly cried out, gripping Peter's cheeks and resting his forehead on his as he bounced, feeling his cock twitching in his hand as Peter pressed into a sweet spot. He was close, and Peter could tell, unbuttoning his shirt with one hand so that at the very least, he came on his stomach and not his clothes.
"You can come- hah, o-on me," Peter assured him, and gripped his ass which rested on his thigh.
"Fucking creep," Mark groaned, but he buried his face in the crook of Peter's neck, breathing in his cologne like he needed it to live. "I do love you, I know it."
Mark was glad now for his coat being under them, because his knees stung from the gravel as it was. Even still, he felt nothing but bliss as he let out a wracked sob, shaking and shuddering in Peter's strong arms as he came. Peter had stopped thrusting for a moment to stroke him hard but slow, his fingers around his balls as he squeezed the orgasm out of him. Come trickled down his cock as he twitched, gripping Peter around the waist like he was a pillow that he needed for support.
Peter didn't feel like a prison – Mark wasn't trapped in his arms, he was home.
"I'm okay," he promised, even though his voice didn't sell it, shaking as it was. "Keep going."
Peter slowly started thrusting into him again, and for a moment, it felt like too much to handle. Mark pressed a sloppy kiss to his lips to ground himself again, but he flinched when Peter's crown caught at his rim, because even if the pain had long since faded, it felt like sparks going off in his stomach.
"You can come inside," Mark gasped, rocking his hips into Peter's.
Mark thought it was only fair since he did come on his stomach – and partially just wanted to feel him deep inside of him, wanted to watch him drip out of him.
Peter stilled for a moment, but when he looked at Mark's serious eyes and his blushing face, he slammed into him again and again.
"You're so good," Peter groaned. "So good for me, gonna make me come."
Peter had never been one to talk dirty during sex, but Mark was bringing out something desperate that he had suppressed for a long time.
He could feel stars in his stomach and the sight of Mark's soft cock drippling come onto Peter's stomach was enough to send him, but what really got him was Mark repeating so good, like an echo. He shot his load into Mark, and clung to him, hugging him tight.
"Fucking- Mark!" he growled, tugging his shirt so hard that it exposed one of his shoulders.
"God," Mark groaned, rolling his eyes back.
Hoffman could already feel his come dripping out of him but Peter had the common sense to pull his coat away before his head lolled back, and he pulled out of him. He watched in fascination as his seed ran down from Mark's ass, Mark pulling his shirt up around his soft belly to keep it clean.
Mark had barely wiped the come off of Strahm's stomach with a spare napkin out of his coat before he slumped into his arms, hugging him tight around the waist. Peter was slightly taken aback by this, but softened, wrapping his arms protectively around him. He kissed his forehead and Strahm nestled against his chest.
For a moment, neither of them said anything, Mark melted into Peter's arms for support. All they did was breathe.
After a moment, Peter untangled his fingers from Mark's hair.
"Look, I can't take you home. But," Peter swallowed thickly, his throat dry. "Let me take you somewhere, like a hotel. We can stay the night."
"That sounds like a great idea," Mark said sarcastically.
"What do you have to lose?" Peter asked. "Just leave the mask here. It wouldn't be the first time people have seen us together."
Mark glanced at the mask in the corner of the alley, sitting in a puddle. Peter was right – he had nothing to lose and everything to gain.
"Just this once," Mark said uneasily, and Peter gave him a slight grin.
His promise meant nothing, because they both knew that it wouldn't be this once. This was just the beginning. And if Mark needed to lie to himself for a while to be okay with that, Peter was more than willing to go along with it. Mark already felt empty of him and knew his appetite would need to be sated sometime. But for the time being, he would take it one moment at a time, with Peter's strong arms and steady gaze to ground him.
The ao3 link btw......
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unwanted-animal · 1 year ago
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tag game: stranger things edition
I was tagged by @harringrovest :D
ride or die ship (your otp): Mungrove and WillBilly :3
most annoying ship: ElMike, honestly. They're 14. If I was still with the guy I dated at 14 I'd be MISERABLE.
second favourite ship: Harringroveson and Harringrove
favourite platonic relationship: Stobin
underrated ship: WIllBilly. Let the flayed boys be gay and commiserate together, dammit.
overrated ship: ElMike, again lol
one thing i would change in canon: Bring Billy and Eddie back. I understand the cost-cutting measures, but like. It sucks bricks.
something canon did right: Everything with Erica, and also putting Billy in that slutty red shirt.
a thing i'm proud of creating for the fandom PLEASE BRAG ABOUT YOURSELF I WANT TO SEE/READ YOUR ART: I wrote a Mungrove Mpreg Fic that's 14k words in 12 days. I also made this WillBilly gif and it took me HOURS. Also this Steddilly (Metalsandwich) playlist
a character who is perfect to me (wouldn't change a thing): Billy Hargrove and Eddie Munson
the character i relate to the most and why: Eddie Munson. I am a gay roleplaying metalhead as well so I imprinted on him IMMEDIATELY.
character i hate the most and why: I don't really hate any character, but I'm most dissatisfied with Jonathan and Mike in S4. Jonathan because he's lying to Nancy and Mike because he's just... dull as dishwater, and his obsession with El isn't healthy for either of them at their age. I know that makes me sound ancient but like. Buddy, chill, you're a freshman.
something i've learned from the fandom: The folks who hate Billy are OBSESSED with him, moreso than my gay ass is and that's saying something.
three tags i seek out on ao3: Billy Hargrove/Eddie Munson, AU, Canon Divergent (WHERE THEY LIVE GOD DAMMIT - or meet in the Upside Down)
song i strongly associate with my otp/favourite character: Eddie: Believer, by Ozzy Osbourne. Billy: Trapped Under Ice by Metallica Steddilly (Steve/Eddie/Billy - Metalsandwich): Kiss Me Deadly by Lita Ford
I'mma tag @pocketsizesatan, @343enderspark, and anyone else who wants to do it! (i need more mungrove/steddilly/billy/eddie moots lol)
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dreamcrow · 2 years ago
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This is slightly more than 500 words but there was an Attempt;
Before she can say anything, though, he's already walking over, setting his stuff down lightly on the counter. Then, he reaches for a pocket—she thinks it's a pocket, anyway; his hand moves too quick to see exactly where—before producing a pristine, ice-blue, very new iPhone.
She is, suddenly, stupidly conscious of her ancient little dinged-up Moto. She definitely doesn't scoot it away behind the register, wtf. If Little Mx. Hipster-Possibly-Kidnapper has something to say about it, he can say it to her face.
But after just a few seconds rifling around in his messages—he only turns the phone around to her.
Most of the screen is taken up by a photo. A selfie, showing a tall punk-type boy—oh, definitely cute—standing behind a girl, teeny-tiny, who's gleefully taking the picture in front of what looks like a bathroom mirror. These two are definitely festival crowd; she knows the rennfaire type, she is the rennfaire type, she's pretty sure she's seen that exact green hair/deer makeup/fairycore combo in Phoenix last year. She realizes, with a pang: oh, no, these kids actually look kind of cool.
There's a message attached. The guy wants her to read it, evidently, scrolling down for her after letting the photo sink in. It immediately makes her feel roughly eight thousand years old; it's spelled so haphazardly, chock full of dumb fancy alternate characters that aren't even ~aesthetique.~ She half has to sound it out to make any sense of it.
There, your proof. Nari ſays to tell you ſhe's a Legende at babysittinge, actually, & also to ſtop worryinge; because we are fine, thou greate nuiſance (her wordes, not myne).
She ſends also this meſsage, that I'm pretty sure can't be put in letters, but whiche after manye obſcenities (also hers, honeſt) ſeems to ſound roughly like—
The messages continue on for some time like this—mildly irritated, definitely written by a teenager (seriously, who spells that badly on purpose?), way too personal for her to want to keep reading. But she has to admit: they don't seem entirely antagonistic.
Something still nags at her. Wanting first to protect the girl, and her weirdly familiar-looking kid chaperone. But...
Jasmine thinks back, suddenly, to when she was eighteen. To when she'd made it all the way to Bakersfield, sniffling and red-eyed and panicked but still, somehow, scraping together the bus fare, foolish gay heart stuck like a fishbone in her throat. Her mom had kept texting all through the night, no matter how hard Jasmine had ignored her, terrified at the imagined contents of all those unread messages.
She remembers, too, when her mom finally caught up to her. How good it had felt, when she'd finally let herself crumple into those strong brown arms.
Oh, she thinks. Oh, God dammit.
She takes a deep breath. "Alright," she huffs. More to herself than to him. "I—okay. Alright. Whatever. Say I believe you." She tries to make her voice stern, as if her decision hasn't already been made. "What makes you think they passed this way?"
(On an unrelated note: it is so nice to have text formatting options in asks now!)
ikr!! what a time to be alive 😂 and ooo, what a juicy snippet to start us off. and from a fic i never expected to become so fond of!
the entire premise of a sip from the devil's cup is "how can i make the stupidest concept imaginable (dread ancient ice jerkass unconsciously grooving to britney spears in a 7-eleven) actually kind of tender," so it gave me quite a lot of room to play with character and detail (two of my favorite things). the first of these, at least to me, is why does skrael have an iphone? well: the easy answer is that he can't get annoying texts from douxie without one, and my priorities are impeccable. 😂
the slightly more complicated answer is: phones are a really powerful signifier. of course he has an iphone, because he's not paying for it and these are the species of device most loudly touted as The Best. of course he has a blue one, because it's got to Match. (would bellroc have a red one? ah...) once he's had it for more than a few months, you bet your ass he's going to have a perfectly normal number of phone charms. he keeps it in hammerspace because that's where he keeps all of the little things he needs to hand, or at least all the things that don't fit on the little chatelaine i imagine him with; he's trying to pretend to be a normie in this obviously human store, but not, like, very hard, so even though the magic isn't ostentatious he definitely still uses just straight-up magic to bring it out. jasmine can't quite see it clearly for what it is because she doesn't quite realize, yet, that such magic exists, let alone right under her nose. ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭
a lot of the fun i had writing jasmine, tbh, comes from being on the cusp of—but not yet slipping over into—that realization. it's very close to the fun i have writing barbara, tbh. she's—i actually had a lot of trouble trying to hold myself back from inventing jasmine's backstory, as you can see from the bit about her being a gay teen runaway! this aspect of her in particular resonates very strongly i think with some advice you gave me once about foils and complements. but again, also: so, so much of what i love about characters like this is looking at how reasonable, average people react to…decidedly un-average circumstances! even before jasmine catches True Sight in the mirror, she can tell something is up. but even if the guy is weird…she can tell, too, he's trying not to cause too much trouble. and then the incomprehensible ancient divine/monster meets the everyman modern mundane/human in the middle and alchemy happens.
…or something like that, anyway. 😂 there's also a lot to be said about humanizing the divine/monster in this—of course jasmine feels how he misses nari, how soft he is about bellroc, all of that after he unequivocally burnt down the apple store, god—but also about making the mundane exceptional? jasmine knows she's taking a risk by helping this stranger. she works among The Public, in a very specific field! but at the same time, she remembers what it was to have run from her own family. while she knows it's not the same for everyone who does so—i think i did a decent job showing her hesitation, here—she chooses to believe the best of this very strange and frankly offputting person she's never met before. one of my absolute favorite brands.
(there's probably a whole separate commentary track for whatever's happening with douxie and nari here, but unless someone's curious, i'll just say: i had a TOTALLY NORMAL amount of fun figuring out where all those long esses should go. 😏)
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puckdoll · 1 month ago
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|| interlude [adieu] ||
Chapter 3/?
read here on ao3
He really can’t hang with these kids anymore.
Not that he’d ever willingly admit it, but God dammit he craved his bed. To be curled beneath the sheets—for however long that lasted—tucked into Geno’s side sounded heavenly. Being at some random Toronto bar trying to salvage whatever ‘good vibes’ they could wasn’t really high on his list of ‘Things I Want to Do’ anymore. But he’d do it, and he’d tolerate it, if only to keep up his image.
Kris slouched in the booth, arm tossed over the back. The guys were scattered around the bar, some shooting their shot, some playing darts, some just shooting the shit. Kris had volunteered to stay at the table to watch their things, mainly because he knew Sid wanted to be with the guys.
It gave Kris a good excuse to just sit and watch. With any new additions to the team, friend groups slowly started to develop. He could see them starting to happen now, guys migrating towards each other like moths to flame. It’d still take a couple weeks before any group firmly solidified, but the progress was interesting.
You so boring, he could practically hear Geno say, old man. So old. So boring.
He smiled a little, hiding it behind his glass. Geno was currently with the group of guys trying to play darts—trying being the important part. Kris didn’t know how much actual darts could be played when you spend half the time pretending to throw them at each other.
A body dropped down in the booth next to him, dragging his attention away just as Geno threw a dart at Doc.
Jack St. Ivany sat hunched in the booth, head low between his shoulders. Kris blinked. The last he’d seen of the rookie, he’d been squashed between EK and Bunts, seemingly enjoying himself. Now, he looked… ashamed?
“What’s up with you?”
Jack’s lips pressed into a thin line, and if possible, he grew smaller. His hands were working on a straw wrapper, folding it then unfolding it and doing it all over again.
“You and Geno.”
Kris paused. Adjusting himself in the booth so he was more facing Jack, he studied him. Him and G’s relationship wasn’t a secret, and hadn’t been for almost five years now, at least amongst their teammates. He figured Jack knew, but maybe he’d been distracted. Maybe, he was just oblivious, like a certain captain Kris knew.
“Me and G?”
“I didn’t know,” Jack said, his voice cracking. He cleared it. “I, uh, didn’t know. About you two. Congratulations.”
“…thanks.”
He didn’t mean to be cold about it, but they haven’t had problems with anyone about it in a long, long time. If this rookie was going to start problems over it, he’d find his stay in Pittsburgh very, very short.
“How… how long—” Jack took a deep breath, leaning away from Kris a bit. “How’d it happen. You two.”
Kris tilted his head, index finger circling the rim of his bottle. How long was a hard question to answer. Did one count messing around? Or a serious long-term relationship? Did attempts at relationships count, too?
Another thought: why was he even contemplating on answering this?
Guys had asked before. Guys had asked way to many questions before. They wanted to know who topped, who bottomed, if it was gay to have your prostate milked (whatever the fuck that means). After all, Kris vowed to never answer one of those questions again. But here he was, with this rookie, and actually thinking about it.
“We knew each other’s secret. I became G’s go-to guy for advice about it. After all these years, we just sort’ve… I don’t know. Realized, I guess.”
Jack nodded. He seemed out of it. Nervous. Kris just wanted him to spit out whatever was wrong. “And… how long did that take?”
“Kid, I don’t know, we had a lot going on,” Kris said, hotly. Jack didn’t react. “What the hell’s the matter with you?”
“…I’m gay,” Jack eventually said, his voice almost too quiet to hear underneath the bars atmosphere. “I’m gay, and I… I just wanted to know. That’s all. That… I don’t know. That it was possible.”
“That what is?”
“…Falling in love. And being open about it.”
Oh, Christ. Sid was going to be fucking pissed at him for how he handled this. Sid loved handling these type of shit; meanwhile, Kris wanted to stab his own eyes with a spork just so he could have an excuse to leave.
“We’re not open about it. Not really. Jack—times have changed, sure, but this still isn’t a great sport to be open in.”
“No, no, I know! I just meant… I don’t know. That I could be open with my teammates. If… if that relationship ever goes anywhere.”
Kris paused. What wouldn’t he have given as a rookie to be told even that much? To have that acknowledgement that he would’ve been accepted? For him and Geno not to spend so long hidden?
“Well… if that’s what you want. Then yeah. Of course you can. No one here’s going to judge. No one’s going to let them.”
Jack didn’t respond, eyes fixated on the grooves in the table. Kris looked to the group only to find Geno staring back. The Russian frowned, making a gesturing movement with his head towards Jack. Kris, in turn, tipped his head towards the door. As Geno disappeared to go find Sid, Kris began to gather his things, as well as Jack’s. He wasn’t going to let this kid sit here in public and be so raw.
“Why don’t we get you back?” Kris suggested, gently nudging Jack out of the booth.
“That’s it?”
“What, do you want a parade? Gonna have to wait till June for that.”
“No, I just… I don’t know. Expected an argument. To be chastised.”
“I’m not your parent. I can only tell you the truth, and let you do with that what you will.” As Geno started making his way towards the table, he nudged Jack faster. “Now, let’s get the fuck out of here.”
Jack nearly face planted it onto the floor, but managed to catch himself. Geno shot Kris a look. Kris just shrugged, because it wasn’t his thing to tell, no matter how much he wanted to.
When they got Jack on his feet, the three of them went out to flag down a cab. This, Kris thought, feels oddly familiar. Geno drunkenly confessing to Kris that he was gay, Gonch and Kris having to drag him out before he made a scene. Life really doesn’t change—it just recycles itself.
With Jack tucked between them in the back of the cab, Kris thought about what he said. If that relationship ever goes anywhere. Who was that other guy—more importantly, was he fucking with Jack, like so many guys had done to Kris before, or did he mean it? Did he want it as bad as Jack?
Kris scoffed under his breath. Look at him, being so concerned about rookies. First with Blomqvist, now with Jack. He was getting soft.
A large, familiar hand covered his own. Geno squeezed, comforting and concerned and steady all at once. Kris squeezed back, unable to voice the soft feelings that were brewing in his chest. Jack said nothing, despite being trapped by Geno’s long arm.
Kris looked out the window. In the reflection, a mirror image of that night nineteen years ago stared back.
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brittlebonesguy · 2 years ago
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5,6,7,8
its samburu. they’re the more annoying tribe. the young people are so entitled and the older people are so condescending. stop!!! jeff really said you guys are insufferable we’re switching up the tribes. hopefully yhis cures my annoyance of everybody. is it bad i want lindsey to break her leg so she’ll leave? even her voice is annoying. yup saw this coming: tom using slurs. i can also barely understand what the fuck he’s saying. and he’s a pervert. the fucking ass slapping? gross. i want none of these bitches to win. silas eating makes me homicidal. the open mouth, the sucking like please you’re literally eating mixed nuts fucking chill. really wish i didn’t hear the phrase “young alpha male” come out of jeff probst’s mouth. 
why is it always mountain dew? dear god get lindsey out. and i hate her dumb braids. bye i don’t care that you’re gone but dammit I was so close to having tom gone and here’s still here. he better be gone before merge or i swear....
“what ever happened to dignity” you were also crying bitch. out of the two of them brandon and kim 1, i would prefer kim 1 to stay. kelly for sure please get rid of lev. i need him gone. “frank hates women and he doesn’t one to win” yeah OBVIOUSLY he looks and sounds it guys please get rid of him. tom for that matter too. they vetting questions for this season had to be: do you hate women? and how do you feel about gay people? imagine being voted out because you lost rock paper scissors. thats so embarrassing. I can’t even tell who could possibly be the first one out in the merge. frank’s “floating on the outside” because there’s too many women on the tribe and he won’t talk to them. kelly......what. i can’t stand these people i have no one to root for. FUCK OFF TOM!! why are so saying this shit on air? please shut up forever i want him gone badly so badly. he skeeves me out. these men make me miss colby and THATS saying something. guys....the name isn’t hard. lex that’s so stupid of you. you’re really gonna give clarence HOURS of time to talk with people before tribal. dumbo.... booooooo clarence was one of the only tolerable people here fuck this season. 
yay the closer look episode i don’t care about 😃 clarence isn’t your warrior out here and yet he got voted off for being to strong and good at challenges......mhm sure kelly. sounds about right. i hate these people they’re so weird 
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artkaninchenbau · 7 years ago
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God knows I want that Mouse King-Junkrat and Krampus-Roadhog skins but I think I can accept it if those two got matching Christmas Beach skins (y’know, based on their sprays). I mean Speedo Hog would definitely be a huge highlight, really it’ll only suck if Junkrat gets a beach skin because like... Sure the sunglasses would look funny but it’d still be just a boring recolor more or less.    I’d much prefer a skin based on Junkrat getting some Christmas present from Hog instead (y’know, since Rudolph has a gun from Junkrat and Junkrat appearently got an ugly Pachimari t-shirt from Hog last year so like. IT’D ONLY BE FAIR AND CUTE)
But in the end as long as Roadhog doesn’t get a snowman skin and Junkrat doesn’t end up as either the Grinch or Jack Frost, I’m good. Is good. It’s cool.
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valenhell · 4 years ago
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From the studio that brought you “I can’t find good Byler fics in the ao3 tag”, comes:
"The Definitive Byler fic rec list"
Literally no one asked for this but because I spent the majority of last year (...and 2019, and 2018...) reading byler fics and coping with life, I thought I’d make a list of some of my absolute favorites. 
The other day I was basically starving for some byler fics and the angel @magicalfairy provided me with some of her faves so I thought I’d do the same, because I love reading, and I love all of these fics and I appreciate their writers💗 And fic writers in general, come on!
- This is a mix of long works and one-shots/short stories. - Everything is mostly fluff with a tad of angst and a lot of internalized homophobia conflict.  - Every fic is completed, except for the ones I mention that they are not. - I try my best to lay out the stories in a way that I won’t spoil you the plot but also warning you of some stuff you might don’t like. Either way, all of these fics are correctly tagged by their respective authors/owners, so read at your own risk. For better understanding, in between brackets I denote Rating, Words and quantity of Chapters. - I feel like I should clarify, none of these are narrated in the singular first person. None of that “And I told him...”, no. 
Long fics
a dream always the same (T, 99k, 35 chapters) What happened in those few weeks between the Battle of Starcourt and the Byers leaving Hawkins. Literally a satisfying and very needed fill in of season three, with a good dose of Mike’s thoughts and conflict. Mike’s characterization is specially amazing in this one. The writing style is amazing and I know the author put everything into making it historically accurate, and it was really sweet. You probably read it, it’s by the amazing sevensided here on Tumblr🧡
Spring Break (T, 120k, 14/15 chapters) The slowburn of my dreams. Lots of internalized conflict and conflict with each other. Conflict within the Party (uhh kind of), conflict with Mike and Will. Byers family has moved and the kids are visiting! Chaos. Characterization is on point. Yeah, I know it’s unfinished, but the fourteenth chapter actually serves as a pretty nice ending. 
This is where it starts (M, 148.8k, 24 chapters) Aged up characters. The Party is in college and Will disappears again, but now it’s different. Mike knows he didn’t vanish from thin air, and the discovery he and the Party end up making is pretty insane. Mystery solving/fantasy/third dimension, throw in a bit of D&D and Mike realizing some shit, and you get this marvelous fic. It’s a breath of fresh air. The world building is definitely one of the elements that stands out the most, because it’s very nicely described, it sounds like a dream and it’s completely immersive. Absolute gem of a fic. 
there’s a Starman waiting in the sky (M, 30.6k, 8 chapters) Do I need to say anything? Will is out there living his best life and Mike realizes that wow, umm, maybe his best friend looks a bit too nice with that costume... and wait, is he getting horny? It’s actually really fun and sexy.
The Evening Speaks (T, 23k, 7 chapters) In where Mike is a late-night college radio host and Will is the art student that stays up till late to catch up with Wheeler on the Mic. They flirt through songs y’all, this one is really sweet. 
heads or tails? (E, 24k, 3 chapters) Aged up characters. I know most people don’t enjoy sex in fics and with specific characters but this one is insanely well written. It’s a slowburn that commits to the tension and with every word you are grasping and anticipating their next move. I think you can find the author here on Tumblr as yousaidyes🧡
The Man of Average (M, 56.7k, 5/? chapters) Aged up characters. No but you don’t understand, the writing here is absolute gourmet. The story is exciting as well, it’s super interesting. Weirdly enough, for being very aged up characters, they are well characterized but they don’t feel like teenagers. They are naturally Mike and Will. The author really captured Mike and Will’s essence. I know, it’s unfinished and it’s updated very rarely, but this is the typical fic you can’t believe someone just posted on the internet for free. I will say though, I think it’s definitely not for everyone. Read at your own risk.
Heartstrings (E, 82.8k, 24/? chapters) Aged up characters. By the same author of The Man of Average. A collection of memories, the road to Mike and Will’s happy ever after. And fucking hell!!!!! You’ll cry and get angry, you’ll cheer for them, then you’ll want to crash their faces together because god dammit you love each other!!! But yeah, same thing here. The writing and the way the story is laid out as a nonlinear narrative is brilliant. And I also think this is one of the best Will versions I’ve read. The author might as well be the og creator of this two characters tbh. You can find the author here as mylesimeblr🧡
Sinners behind the walls (T, 1.5k, 1/1) And because I can’t stop recommending this author, a little thing of Mike tormenting himself but also being too deeply committed to Will. 
The Red Envelope series (T/E, 167K, two completed works) Something happens that Will thought was impossible and from there, pure drama and romance. Anything by this author has the potential to become your absolute favorite fic, but this series in particular is amazing. I doubt that any of you haven’t read this, but it doesn’t hurt to put it in this list. I’m pretty sure the author is serendipitous-magic on Tumblr🧡
A New Fight series (T, 91k, two completed works, one WIP) And finally the Star Wars AU that we all needed. But this isn’t your typical “Mike is Han”, “Will is Leia” and “El is Luke”, it’s way more interesting than that, and the author has appropriated the Star Wars world like no other. I’ll admit I’m not a 100% fluent in SW lore but this is amazing to me either way. This author is also on Tumblr, tea-for-one-please🧡
- Yes, most of these are (if not all), in a way, canon compliant/canonverse/canon continuation into fanon. (In a way)
One-shots and short stories
Sundae for Two, Please (G, 4.8k) Steve being the supportive friend and older brother these kids collectively need. (not Jonathan erasure, we love him). Steve is very sweet himself, and this little cute thing through his POV is gorgeous. Yes, it’s byler.
Backstage (T, 10k, 2/2) Jonathan, you forgot to mention to Will how hot your new band’s guitarist is, dude. Now he’s hyperventilating and weirdly flirting with him in the corner. Background Stonathan because why not.
102 Peach Street (G, 3.8k) Established relationship, but not only that, they are married :’’))) PURE fluff. Extreme fluffiness. Diabetes. 
sweatshirts and bottled up feelings (T, 3.2k) Or, Mike thinks that the sweatshirt Will wears looks insanely good on him. And kitchens are for lovers. 
kiss it better (T, 16.3k) Basically one of the best character studies of a few precise moments of Mike and Will’s relationship and feelings. 
will wonders ever cease (T, 11.3k) #i ship will and happiness. Omfg what a beautiful piece of fanfic. Will centric, this kid really deserves all the good in the world.
The Calm After the Storm (T, 1.6k) Tooth rotting fluff, boyfriends in love. Boyfriends being lazy, cuddling, love words, kisses. Boys loving each other’s company... Basically, Mike and Will in their element. What more can you ask for?
neither of us ready to let go (T, 4.8k) That scene from season three, but a bit of a fix it. 
Still in love (G, 1k) Domestic, married life au fluff. Y’all, I’m a sucker for established Byler, even if I can’t find many fics with it. But this is very sweet. It takes place in 2020, but I don’t think there are any mentions of the COVID-19 crisis that I remember.
I Nver Find Out ‘Til I’m Head Over Heels (G, 12.5K) Classic 5+1 fic. If you haven’t read it, where have you been? This is your moment. In where Mike keeps inviting Will to the school dances and Will thinks it’s just a joke until he realizes it’s not. 
Before You’re Gone (T, 5.9k) Will is leaving Hawkins and Mike thinks this is a great moment for a confession. This one I discovered last friday, thank you friend @magicalfairy 💗
You’re weird Wheeler (M, 4.5k) Mike unintentionally starts a tradition of going to each other to talk about their sexual encounters just after they finish. Will keeps getting more explicit with the details he shares, and he makes his best friend interested. This one is really fun y’all.
Out-Of-Town Friends (N/R, 4.6K) It’s not rated. I haven’t re- read it but I’d say it would probably fall in a T rating. So cute!! Will has new friends and sneaks off every friday and the Party doesn’t know where he is going, so Mike decides to follow him and is surprised. 
Snowed Under (G, 1.3k) By the same author of The New Fight series. Mike is spending christmas by himself in college because a snowstorm hits Chicago and Nancy can’t drive to see him, but then he has a surprise visitor. Ahhh just a lil sweet holiday fic. Super cute. 
you love me anyway series (T, 7.1k, three completed works) Literally just the cutest thing ever. Established Byler. Will loves to take pictures and he loves taking pictures of Mike. It’s adorable. 
you wanna be friends forever (i can think of something better) (T, 9k) This one is so amazing. So. Amazing. From Will’s POV, my kid deserves the world and he gets it. 
okay not to be okay (T, 4.9k) Mike is a bit sad but then everything is okay. 
can’t hold out forever (G, 18.4k) Y’all!!!!! 5+1 sweetness. Mike has been falling in love since kindergarten. And it’s long af, you’ll enjoy it. 
even if it takes forever (G, 1.3k) College short AU, they miss each other, they love each other, they promise all to each other. It is sappy y’all.
clear as day (N/R, 18.4K, 4 chapters) It’s not rated, but I’d say it falls in the T category. Strangers to friends to lovers. And also, everyone is pretty gay; we have our dynamic trio Mike, Max and El as disaster lesbians (and gay). Will works at the library and he is also gay. Lucas and Dustin and Will are the best friends we needed. It’s very sweet and the Party is kind of formed here!
I went overboard with the one-shots, so you must have realized how much I love long one-shots and I favor them over long works lmao but they are all amazing!!! If it’s on this list, I probably read it at 2 am, sobbing in my bed. So. Hope you enjoy it☺️🧡
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