#god it really is incredible how much the personality of this cat changes based purely on the wigs

[growling]

could you perchance elaborate on npd squirrelstar because i think i see the vision

ohhhhh absolutely anon, and as I don't get many asks about warriors: hi :3

Honestly it kinda started out as a pure vibes thing, like I just thought "hmmmm which cats to hit with The NPD Beam.. squirrelstar hhholy shiit i think i just had a vision. i didn't see anything in the vision but I had a visionnn" and it stuck. Mostly headcanon stuff, maybe some slight au territory (but wc canon is already flimsy as it is anyway, so really, it didn't change much from the originals) but the longer I though about it the more it just kinda fits in lol, especially with her torment gauntlet storyline but not entirely because of it, either -

(I do not know how coherent this'll be, or if I even say everything I wanted to, as I am. so sleepy rn) Honestly the first thing I thought after initially coming up with it is. her relationships with Brambleclaw and Ashfur gsfdsghsd. It's very common to just believe that the abuser must be The Narcissist (or that just, all people with npd are automatically predestined to be abusers no matter what) while it's actually way more often that people with npd are more likely to stay in those relationships, or get abused because *shocker* mentally ill people actually way more likely to be treated as subhuman by society and the like. And I've already saw one or two people just proclaim that Brambleclaw is a narcissist because um, *checks notes* he's controlling of his wife and extra sensitive of (oftentimes valid) criticisms of his leadership or something idk man which. uhhhhh. no can we not please + shut up forever + now I'm gonna do the opposite nobody can stop me (also happened with rainflower. and clear sky. and sol. but mostly rainflower. lord help me)

(on a sillier note though....... nothing much to say about Ashfur as of now but after his Squilf/Ashf breakup if he was a human he'd become a self-proclaimed tiktok Dark Empath)

And lastly the headcanon stuff, which I completely made up while stirring the muffin batter but they might or might not have canon basis too, I don't know, I'm not gonna look for it and I don't really care either;

Does the right thing not because it's "what you're supposed to do or whatever idk I have no idea how any of you define it anymore", but because it makes her feel good. And even if by the end of the day she doesn't get any praise or reward for it, even if she gets shunned for it, what matters to her is that she did the Good Thing and therefore she is Good and that's what matters, and everybody else is so stupid for not seeing it. Really, why does it always have to be her that actually bothers with helping people nowadays. She's got a so much better grade at Good Person than like 99% of her Clan, StarClan bless

Leafpool was always consistently her equal person, she deserves the world and maybe even more than she does because she's just that great, it's her an Leafy against the world <3 we're eating soft tacos later <3 hold on Squirrelflight's Hope just called and- oh god, oh fuck

neither low nor high empathy but a secret third thing: really fucking weird ever changing empathy that also varies on whoever it is for some unexplainable reason. Based off what I have and how do I even explain this in simple, not-10-paragraph-post length....... just trust me on this. What I'll say rn is that she tends to personally care about nearly exclusively towards people relevant to her, or those she considers "interesting" regardless if she actually likes them.

always sets her goals either incredibly high (because naturally she's gonna achieve this exactly as she imagined and wait what do you mean-), or very low (so that she can do the woohoo!!! whenever she succeeds)

she splashes water everywhere when drinking she spills it so much she puts all her paws in that damn stream then puts them all over the kids and now they're all wet they all shake it off directly at Brambleclaw

> gets criticized once > fucking dies

I'll add onto this if I have time maybe, and don't completely forget about this whole post

[sofialsan15]

Habibi

Hi There!!! I'm new to this fandom and to tumblr (first time I ever published something) and I don't know if I'm permitted to just publish it, so I thought about levaing it here (if there is a procedure I'll just erase it) . It's on AO3 too, if you could go there too it'll be appreciated.

This is a songfic based on a french song named Habibi by Kedjic Girac. It's just screamed to me Daminette (personal opinion).

WARNINGS!!!

English it's not my first language.

Possible character death.

There, when you laugh

 

He observed as she danced across the garden, like an angel in the Eden. Everything she touched sprouted with more life, as if she was the only thing they needed to live. He observed as she smiled, as she laughed. With his dog circling her like he was inciting her to dace even more. It was as clear as a note. He would do anything to make her laugh, to see her smile. If there was someone up there, only they knew how much she deserved to be happy.

 

When you cry

 

He remembered how he had found her. He was in France; it was a simple vacation to go to the festival of art that the city of loved had hosted. His father had encouraged him to participate with one of his paints. He had said a firm ‘No’ but after some alone time to think, he really wanted to do it. He spent months doing paint after paint. Nothing convinced him. So, he set course earlier to find inspiration. He was walking in the night when he heard a commotion, it was a group of people laughing and recording a girl that was crying. A blonde male was looking like he wanted to be everyone but there.

‘You´re not worth my freedom’ He had said.

They parted and he sucked in a breath. She was an angel, as the moon shined in her midnight hair. Tears fell like pearls and her bluebell ayes shone like two precious jewels.

 

When nothing matters to you

 

And in that moment, he saw it. How she was in the verge of giving up and abandon her light. In that moment he thought it was just Paris, the way she seemed to light the night like a star. How wrong was him. Even here in Gotham, it was as if she purified the environment. He was about to go to her when a dark butterfly flew passed him directly to her. How ethereal, he thought. Thus, the next thing that happened surprised him. She extended her hand and as softly as it landed, it transformed in a pure white one.

 

‘Not today petit papillion’ she said softly.

 

 

It is life, don't be afraid

 

He saw as she got up, she inhaled, and it was as if live was precious again. She smiled, a nostalgic one to the moon. His heart started beating loudly, and his cheeks redden. The long ribbons in her hair and the white silky dress were balancing softly, in a rhythm only the wind knew. She was incredible small to his 6’3. She exhaled one more time and looked at him. He remembered the Zing that sounded and the click they too felt. She had taken a step towards him and looked confused. It was when he met Tikki. As he explained what the two were.

 

Nothing in the world is strongest than us two

 

And as they fought side to side, he as the new black cat holder, they just inevitably fell in love with each other. Not because they were halves to a sole ying-yang meant that they were going to. But he saw something in him, and it was impossible no to saw something in her too.

She who she was kind.

She who was strong in more ways than one.

She who made him smile.

She who forgive.

She who defended.

She who loved with all her.

 

Who said flowers only grow close to home?

 

It was an extenuating battle the one they had, she said that he had died of exhaustion. After all, it had taken a whole month in the open sky of the city. The miracle cure had brought him back, still he only just remembered extenuating pain and tiredness. The city was full of bad memories, even if they did meet there. So, Damian had brought her to his home. That was finally complete with her, in his arms. And she had bloomed even more beautiful. Full of happiness and love, it was as is she was a flower on the wrong soil. Vibrant colors, not one petal rotten and a delightful aroma had spread from the flower since it changed the environment.

 

 

There they said that it's better we quit here my love,

 

It was so difficult for her though, for them. His father had not approved, and it was only because she was not heroine. Fragile and vulnerable, he had call her. The Al- Ghul did not want to share what happened in his journey. No one outside of France new about what happened there. He had tried to reason with him, but even his brothers were on his father´s side because of their own bad experiences. They all had suffered and could not see another fallout for him. It hurt, a lot, that they doubt him. That they didn´t accepted her. Her parents hadn´t approved either, her ex had bad mouth him with them and they just didn´t want to see reason. She cried when the two of them left the bakery, but soon they forgot.

 

And they will soon forget again, together.

 

 

It would be better if we let go but ya habibi,

 

Already had she shed too many tears for the people she had loved. For unworthy people who were too good for her. Not that he was worthy, but death will be much sweeter than to ever hurt the reason of his existence. They her the press, saying that they were not a match. They heard their families telling them too. They her their most precious friends, who had no right to judge their love.

 

I still remember when you were telling me

 

But they fought for their love, they will always. Against everyone, against anyone, against nobody and against somebody. For one thing they were sure, it was that their love was that. Their. Not somebody else´s. If they did not had faith, had trust in each other. No one already had. It was so easy to love each other.

 

 

Ya habibi

Ya habibi

We said forever, I swore you promised

Ya habibi

 

They did, they promised each other that forever was too little, and always wasn´t enough. They swore love in the most sacred way it could exist. With the blessing of deities and a plead not even the darkest magic could break. And they made love under the stars, with love driving them both. With love as the only witness they needed. They made love until the sun had risen from the mountain of Tibet, in a hidden temple that had no one.

 

 

 

There, when I cry

When I scream

 

Somethings were too precious to him not to break under pressure. Even more so when it was his father. He had discovered her healing him with the powers she developed why she was bonded to the miracoulous. As Robin, he was still in his mask and she had rushed to save him. His father had scream and he had scream. Nothing else had frighten him more than when his father had took her and swing her to the WE tower. He was interrogating her as she stood her grpund against the railing. His brothers haces held fear too, having her grown in them. And he remebered her scream as the railing broke and his father tried to reach for her. He remeber his own scream and the cries he had made. The last look she had given him before plumating to the ground. His brothers had restrained him as he tried to go to her.

 

‘She couldn´t transform !’

 

I know that you are there

 

That night his brothers saw him cry and scream at their father. It was too close of a call. He had thought that he had lost them.

 

I lose myself, in bed, when you are not there.

 

And she laid in the hospital, because of the use of the miraculous on her condition. He held her hand. Only his sisters had come to accompany him. Alfred the only person he could talk to. He had dreamed many nights in the hospital that he would wake up and she would not be there. By his side, in his arms. That he was alone.

 

They told me, get used to it, but I think of only you

  There, in my heart, it hurts, I do nothing but think of it

 

So, know, as Damian sees her laugh in the garden of the Wayne manor. With her bulging stomach. That had such a precious cargo, even there his heart hurt when he thinks again what he would do without them.

 

 

When my eyes, tear up, when the changes hurt me

 

But for now, all he had was tears from happiness. As she looks at him and smiles. With the pocket gods dancing like fairies around her.

 

I still remember when you were telling me

 

Ya habibi

 

And she still does. As he does too.

 

Ya habibi

 

His love.

 

We said forever, I swore you promised

Ya habibi

 

They said forever and more. More than always. And they had it.

 

 

 

Ya habibi

[p5youllneverseeitcoming]

Persona 5 Strikers/Scramble

So! I finished the story of Persona 5 Strikers and I wanted to share my thoughts as I have soooo much to say but cannot share with my friends due to spoilers :’) I am currently playing on a New Game+ as, ya girl wants the Platinum Trophy :o

I will talk about some of the things that I really liked here (Spoiler free don’t worry) AND include spoilery things under the cut so I won’t ruin the experience for anyone else!

The Plot

Obviously this takes place after the original Persona 5 story finishes and as opposed to a whole year, you just get 1 month with the Phantom Thieves. I really liked exploring all the cities you travel to and the character interactions were so cute!! I really like the two new characters introduced (Sophia and Zenkichi Hasegawa). Both of them fit the story so well and their interactions with the other Thieves are honestly so good and pure! Also?? Their outfits? Amazing T_T It was such a nice change seeing everyone in casual outfits as opposed to their school uniforms!

I also loved the fact that you could choose to play with characters that get introduced late game like Haru for example straight away. I for one, always have her in my party as soon as she’s available so having her for the whole game was like a dream come true haha. I’ll talk about Sophia and Zenkichi a bit more under the cut but I will say that it’s so fun to play as them! I personally prefer Sophia more as she has healing skills which are always really useful and she uses yo-yo’s for her weapons which are so fun to use. Zenkichi uses a great sword which is very Final Fantasy of him and I am loving it. I love their Phantom Thief outfits! Sophia looks super cute in her floofy coat and boots and Zenkichi just looks so cool! His hat is goals, I want one T_T

The anime cutscenes in the game are also... Omg... I just can’t help but fangirl over how everyone looks... ESPECIALLY SOPHIA OML, she’s so... Bby... And of course, the dialogue options you can choose are so funny, then again what else can you expect from a game that had the option to say “you jelly?” to Ryuji.

I won’t spoil the main plot but this game works similarly to Persona 5 in the sense of, you still go into dungeons but these ones are a lot shorter and when you leave the dungeon, the days don’t actually move forward, only specific story points advance the days. So essentially if you wished, you can stay and grind for as long as you like!

The Gameplay

I won’t lie, as expected from a hack-and-slash it gets quite chaotic at first if you don’t fully know what’s going on but you get used to it pretty quickly! The game gives you tutorials whenever anything new appears and you get the hang of it pretty well by the first dungeon. You still only have 4 characters in your party and Akira must always be present but here you can actually run around as the other party members when the battles are over! Also? Morgana gets comical sound effects when he does things like jumping and running and I was LIVING for it.

The other thing that changed is, obviously it’s not turn based so if you were like me and wore the SP restoring accessories to get 7SP back each turn, you’re in for a last surprise! In this game you actually use your items quite a lot as there isn’t a limit to how much you can use as you access them mid battle by pausing. Later on you get specific skills that restore your SP after each battle or by performing All Out Attacks and 1 More’s so honestly, SP isn’t really a problem for regular battles. I mainly found it running out quickly when I was fighting some of the optional bosses but I always had SP restoring items so it was all good hehe.

You still do things like All Out Attacks and 1 More’s in this game but you also do something called ‘Showtime’ which is very similar to the ones introduced in Royal only in Strikers it’s for one character, you basically build up the showtime gauge as you battle enemies and, once activated, you deal significant damage to stronger enemies like bosses as well as all of the enemies in the area. The All Out Attacks also have their own little animation with your party posing and just looking really good!

Yusuke being so extra is honestly such a mood omg... Also Mona T_T So smol.

Every party member has their own special quirks such as Ann and Makoto applying Fire and Nuclear affinity respectively to their regular weapons, Morgana turning into the Mona car and so on. I personally always had Haru and Yusuke in my party and kept switching between the other Thieves to see what I like best. Personally, I really like having Morgana or Sophia as they’re really good healers, Morgana obviously having the more powerful skills such as Mediaharan and Salvation.

Also... The menus... Omg... If you thought the Persona 5 menu was stylish then you will LOVE the Strikers menus. They’re so stylish! And I love that all the Phantom Thieves are there too, it’s so cute T_T

The only thing I don’t like is the game doesn’t pause when your controller dies so uh... I may or may not have died during a boss battle when I was like 2 hits away from winning and then just... Stopped moving letting the boss hit me with a killing combo :)

To be honest though the party that I had pretty much all the time was:

But as I said, I liked to change Morgana and Sophia around every now and then.

The Music

Omg the music. Atlus really just said: Hey what if we made Persona 5 music again but like... More epic?

The song that plays right as soon as you have control of Joker is SO. GOOD. I legit had to pause for like 5 mins just to jam out. I don’t think it will come as much of a surprise but in my opinion, Persona 5 definitely has one of the best video game soundtracks, I absolutely love all the songs!

I will discuss some of the dungeon themes in the spoilers but I absolutely love the soundtrack for this game. Every dungeon theme is so fitting for said dungeon, I genuinely listen to them all the time, especially when doing my research for my essays!

The battle music is really energetic as opposed to the jazzy feel from the original Persona 5 soundtrack but it’s very fitting for the actual battle as you often fly all around the area instead of standing in one spot. I will say, Last Surprise made an excellent comeback despite being an already amazing song which is just, amazing, incredible, fantastic...

Other things

Well, I can’t go into detail due to spoilers but they deadass put a JoJo reference as well as a character in the game :’) The moment I saw them I was fangirling so hard!!! Also? The villain designs in this game??? Amazing. Beautiful. Very creative!

The Phantom Thieves interacting with each other is also really cute! I ESPECIALLY liked the fact that Morgana and Ryuji got along a lot better! They still had small fights here and there but they pretty much apologised to one another straight away which I really liked! Also? Ryuji protecting his friends, especially the girls? Amazing. Wonderful. Cannot help but stan.

Well, that concludes the non-spoiler section which.... Is kinda long haha, Below the cut I will talk about the spoilery things so I advise looking at it AFTER you finish the game!

The Plot

The plot of this game is really fun if you ask me. You travel around Japan defeating Monarchs in Jails AND you get to experience the joys of summer vacation with your friends and your new Persona dad. I really like the fact that you don’t advance time when you leave the Jails because this gives you the chance to grind as much as you want before tackling harder fights like some of the optional bosses. The boss designs themselves were so good! Especially Alice?! My God? She’s beautiful?? Look at her!

Persona 5 Strikers said you can be horny on main... Just this once o_o. She literally steps on Joker in the Jail which o_o Ma’am... Plz but she ALSO steps on her manager in the real world.

I really liked all the bosses in this game because they felt so... Real? Obviously I don’t agree with them for brainwashing people into worshipping them, but I really like how the game gave them backstories that showed why they strayed away from the right path. The fact that the Thieves tell them that they understand their struggles because they themselves went through the same thing (Like Ann and Yusuke) honestly made me appreciate the story that much more. I really liked Haru’s little arc in Sapporo because not only did she help Mariko Hyodo and show her that despite mistakes you can always stand up and start again, but she also got to have more screentime, like that cute fountain scene she has with Akira! ALSO? The Hee-Horde?! I was laughing for a solid 5 minutes when I saw it! It was so cute how Haru, Sophia, Ryuji and Yusuke were so into it while Futaba was just there like: ????

I think my favourite Jail out of all of them will definitely have to be the Kyoto one, a.k.a. the Jail controlled by Zenkichi’s daughter, Akane. Despite how short it is, you can learn so much about her. The overall aesthetic of the jail shows her love to the Phantom Thieves and in the actual Jail theme you can hear fragments of ‘Life Will Change’ and ‘Wake Up, Get Up, Get Out There’ which I think is absolutely amazing! The boss fight for this jail honestly took me 3 tries to beat as the first time, I died due to not fully getting how Shadow Joker worked, and the second time, I was about 2 hits from beating him but then... My controller died :’) By the time it turned back on I was already c-c-c-c-comboed to death so :’) This is also the jail where Zenkichi awakens to his Persona and honestly? I found the little segment where he has to sneak around in his usual everyday attire so cute, bless him, he really did adopt 7 teenagers, their cat and an AI daughter.

ALSO?! They deadass put Dio in this game? Like when I first saw Natsume’s shadow I was like: Hm looks kinda familiar...

BUT THEN?!

Needless to say I was fangirling pretty hard.

I liked Akira Konoe, very much vibing with his Power Ranger aesthetic however, I have to say, his boss fights was surprisingly... Easy? At least it felt easy to me which was kind of... Disappointing I suppose for him supposedly being “the final boss” HOWEVER, I very much liked how his calling card was delivered, and the fact that Zenkichi could finally get his revenge was very satisfying! 

Now, let’s talk about the end game, mainly the Abyss Jail.  I did NOT see it coming (haha) that it was Ichinose all along! As I’m currently replaying the game, the fact that she doesn’t want to look at Sophia despite specialising in AI technology should have been my first clue that something is not quite right here! 

When she forces Sophia to attack the Thieves, it honestly broke my heart. The fact that she recognised Joker and Skull... And she threw herself off the ledge just so she can’t hurt them anymore... Yo, I love her so much T_T That’s why her awakening to her Persona (her true Persona) was such a satisfying scene! Her Persona (Pandora) has a really cool design, I especially like the fact that she represents the Hope Arcana (as there was hope left at the bottom of Pandora’s box) and that Pandora herself kept the box-y design from her original “Persona” Pithos. I found it quite funny that all the skills Pithos has ended with a “?”. Anyway, the scene where she tells Ichinose all the things she learnt, and that Ichinose herself has a heart despite believing that she doesn’t for so long was so touching. It showed that Sophia deeply cares for her, despite the fact that she literally said she’s the reason so many people are getting mind controlled by EMMA. The ending scene with the two of them laughing and holding hands... My heart T_T

Now then, let’s talk about EMMA.

I. Loved. The. Final. Boss. Fight.

The fact that the game makes you use ALL the characters for the final fight! As I usually switched out characters here and there, my reserve party members weren’t severely under-levelled which made the fight pretty okay! I had quite... Strange groups I would say as I had Makoto and Zenkichi being a team, Morgana, Ann and Ryuji being a team, and Akira, Haru, Yusuke and Sophia being the final team. The final boss itself, has an absolutely beautiful design. I especially loved the angel like wings because it really showed that EMMA saw herself as a saviour. The cutscene that plays after with all the Thieves dealing the final blows before watching all the desires fall around them was honestly so pretty... Man, this game series is just so aesthetic!

When the credits rolled and all the photos started appearing I couldn’t help but start crying. It really felt like you were actually there, living through all the memories and the fact that Sophia called the photo of all of them together “Treasure”... T_T

The Gameplay

I already pretty much said all I wanted for the gameplay in the non-spoiler section but I will say, the Showtimes and the Master Skills each character learns are so good! I love that once you master all of them you’re bascially unstoppable, I especially love Haru’s and Akira’s as it allows them to deal damage even if they’re a safe distance away from the enemy. The fact that you can learn Bond skills that restore SP with every All Out Attack and One More is honestly so helpful because it saves you going back and forth between the real world but then again, by this point you probably have way too many HP and SP restoring items!

I really liked that Zenkichi has no weaknesses and uses Almighty damage but I find the whole Fury/HP consumption combination a bit weird. After a while you get used to it and obviously you don’t have to activate fury at all but as I said before, I prefer playing as Sophia. Although, I will say that gun wise, I think Zenkichi’s are a lot more fun to use than Sophia’s blasters, but then again that’s just my personal opinion!

The Music

As I said, the music was so fitting for each Jail, I absolutely love it.

The first Jail, you honestly can’t help but bop your head to the beat. It really gives you the impression that you’re in some kind of twisted theme park which really fit the overall aesthetic of the Jail. I loved the vibrant neon colour scheme in such a dark looking place.

The Okinawa Jail... My God that theme was so good. I can’t really explain it but the song really made you feel like you were... Alone, like the place was truly abandoned and forgotten. As soon as the violin started playing I couldn’t help but just stop and listen to it. The overall jail was just so... Creepy. The Shadows there resemebled the shadows you would usually find in the previous Persona games, just this black mass slithering around. I think it was very fitting that they put the Reaper in this Jail. 

As I mentioned before, the Kyoto Jail theme is my absolute favourite. The fact that it has elements of other Persona 5 songs due to Akane being a big Phantom Thieves fan was such a good choice! I love how when you take a closer look, you can see the Phantom Thieves logo on the lanterns and the fact that Shadow Akane herself made a Phantom Thief outfit for herself... Big mood. I loved how all the Thieves encouraged her to try and get along with her dad better AND that they taught Zenkichi how to cook just so he can make curry for her, especially when you remember just how much curry means to someone like Futaba. 

I really liked the remix of Rivers in a Desert, then again what did I expect from a Persona game? The battle music is ALWAYS amazing. I really liked how this played when you fight Konoe as it parallels when you fight Shido in the original, supposedly the final fight, only to find out that there is something MUCH bigger than them.

Other things

This post is already way too long and if you read all of this... Thank you so much. Sadly, I cannot share this with any of my friends as it’s spoilers so I hope you guys don’t mind me sharing this here! I would love to see your opinion of this game!!!

Also? Yusuke and Akira are now canonically dating and I think that’s beautiful

And then that scene later on

Why do you think we came here with Yusuke, Morgana?

TL;DR: I love this game

[shinjaeha]

itsay ep 3 (thoughts + spoilers)

itsay ep 3 fucking obliterated me so here i am with some more thoughts on this episode (drama) in general. this is just me being an incoherent mess bc my mind is basically just one long !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! after having watched this (once raw and again subbed). this isn’t an analysis, it’s literally me just gushing over the ep as i watch it bc boy oh BOY.

WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT EVERYTHING HITTING DIFFERENT AFTER THE BOAT SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if i thought the tension in the boat knocked the breath out of me, this whole ep was that x10000.

they really started us off with a bang having continued straight off from last ep with teh smelling oh-aew’s hair, huh?? teh rubbing his face with the coconut paralleled with oh-aew smelling his coconut scented shampoo?? excuse me as i cry into my hands.

teh wasn’t willing to wake up early for tarn when she wanted to draw early in the morning, but when he sees that oh-aew wants to wake up early to study, HE’S the one that makes sure that oh-aew wakes up (and he stays up to keep oh-aew company, even if it’s just over the phone). then again when they’re at the resort...love that tarn realises that too. boy ain’t subtle. also, how is it even possible that they can have that much tension just speaking over the phone?? they’re not even in the same room and the tension between the two of them is so thick i can barely breathe.

the “let me know when you’re home”!!!!!!!!!!!!! BOYFRIEND BEHAVIOUR. as soon as oh-aew asked teh why he always asked tarn that, i KNEW they were gonna put that in there for him and oh-aew and i’m glad i wasn’t disappointed :))) the look on oh-aew’s face when he saw the text!!!!!!!!!!! the way he stopped in his tracks!!!!!!!!!

i already had a feeling that oh-aew was going to be the first one to properly realise and accept his feelings for teh based on the teasers (makes sense since he already knows he likes boys...he’s more sure of his sexuality, which would of course make it easier for him to accept based on that). seeing the way he used the ‘if you get close to him and he doesn’t move away it means he likes you’ theory that teh initially told him to try on bas with teh too was really cute. and the jealousy over tarn. i LOVED that we got to see a more petty side to him when he announced he was going to room with bas partly bc of how lowkey jealous/mad he was about teh and tarn talking over the phone. it left teh so unsettled and confused (the piano music was PERFECT in that scene), and is 510% something teh would have done too (based on the previous two eps). they really are a perfect match huh. but poor bas being caught in the middle of the two of them ;;;

i liked that a lot of this ep was from oh-aew’s perspective. i feel like we got mostly teh’s pov in the first two eps, so it was really nice to see things from oh-aew’s pov too. gave us all more insight into his personality and he’s honestly SO MUCH more flirty than i thought he was going to be omg. the potato chip scene where he just crawled over to teh and ate that potato chip all the while staring straight at teh, then lying on his lap?????????? teh was (understandably) flustered after that AND SO WAS I. i was not expecting that whatsoever. i was also really impressed with how honest oh-aew was about his feelings. i love that he’s stayed true to their previous heart to heart in the boat scene last ep where he basically told teh that he wanted transparency between the two of them. he’s sticking to that, and i admire him so much for being able to be that vulnerable and true to himself. i thought there might have been more confusion with bas, but it looks like as soon as he realised his feelings might have faded/that he was feeling things for teh now, he just went with it. i know in my last text post i said that oh-aew is usually the more cautious/pragmatic of the two, but i feel like when it comes to his feelings, he seems to be really in tune with who and what he wants (more so than teh). this of course makes sense bc he’s likely had more time to come to terms with his sexuality...which is what teh’s figuring out for himself now. on top of that, oh-aew’s feelings for teh are a lot stronger than the ones he has for bas. and since he’s also more certain that teh likes him back, he’s so much bolder in how he approaches teh. and teh, to his credit, returns that honesty too when oh-aew basically pushes him into acknowledging that there’s ~something between them (hammock scene). i was kind of expecting him to push away from that/deny it, but he didn’t. he’s obviously just a lot more confused with his feelings and still needs some time to understand them and process them fully. on a related note, hammock scene was so loaded and SO well acted by the both of them. the fact that they can move from playful in one scene too achingly intense in another always throws me for a loop.

another thing i really love about the two of them is how they push one another to be better. it’s that rivalry that makes their bond even stronger, but it’s also something that worries me for future eps ngl...

but i honestly feel SO BAD for bas...clearly, he likes oh-aew, and although oh-aew was initially confused with the two of them, he’s definitely more convinced when it comes to his feelings for teh. but when bas essentially asked oh-aew out, and oh-aew said let’s invite the rest of they guys?? he looked so sad and my heart kind of broke a little. it’s like watching the poor second lead in a kdrama. and tarn too :( i really hope that when teh accepts his feelings for oh-aew, he doesn’t keep her hanging on the way that most BLs tend to do. she deserves so much better than that. my heart really hurts for the both of them, but at the same time teh and oh-aew are just magnets being pulled together at this point. they can’t stay away from each other.

the scene where teh rubs the smell of oh-aew’s coconut scented pen (from what he’s written) all over his face bc he’s at his limit and can’t stand all those pent up feelings anymore, only to race out to their special meeting place on the beach????? the moment he sees that oh-aew’s there too and he chases after him entranced (and the smile on oh-aew’s face)????? the way the instrumental ost just swells the moment they see each other????? the way they tease and dance around another yet again?????  PURE ART. A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE. THIS IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL DRAMA I HAVE EVER SEEN. this whole sequence has to be my fave scene in this ep. god, that part where the camera closes in on them and they’re face to face before oh-aew steps away again had my heart trying to flutter its way out of my CHEST. THEY HAVEN’T EVEN KISSED IN THE SERIES YET AND THEY CAN REDUCE ME TO THIS. honestly, their power is something else. the fact that they can stir so many emotions in all of us just by the way they glance at one another, by the way they dart around one another barely touching...there are dramas/movies with multiple kiss/love scenes that can’t even create that tension and longing. it’s the kind of chemistry that burns you inside out. it’s so palpable.

the thigh massage scene had me CAPTIVATED (like all their scenes tbh) and then teh’s mum came to wake me (and the both of them) up haha. but for real, there’s just something so tentative about what’s happening. these feelings are new to them, and they’re easing their way into it. always toeing the line, but not overstepping it yet. it’s primal. they keep letting those feelings build up more and more and more. and you can always feel the way it’s leading to something else. and of course it leads into the next scene where teh’s tutoring oh-aew again but the atmosphere is so incredibly heavy, so tight, that they can’t contain it anymore (i mean, the fact that they contained it for so long when they’re teenage boys with feelings for one another is already astounding enough to me). teh tries so hard, but then the back scratch happens and...THIS ICONIC SCENE...i thought they were going to kiss then (before oh-aew turned around), but then we got something else entirely and the intimacy of it all. just wow. literally not a single kiss and it was one of the most sensual scenes i have ever seen in a BL. it’s just the way they get so caught up in one another. THE YEARNING OF IT ALL. this whole ep was just pure anticipation, and i have never ever wanted two characters to kiss more than i do these two. it’s the build up that gets me (idk if this can be considered slow build since there’s only been like three eps but it sure as hell feels like it!!!!!!!!!). then teh pulls away and it’s like a smack in the gut...but at the same time, i get it. he’s not ready yet. there’s so much for him to take in and he’s not there yet (not the way oh-aew is), and just like oh-aew, it keeps us all hanging on, so close but not quite there yet.

so much of this felt like this cat and mouse game between the both of them where one of them would advance, then retract...it makes the tension between the two of them even MORE overwhelming bc you keep anticipating something, and you get fleeting moments of it, but then it’s over by the time you blink. they keep toying with one another, but not crossing the line YET bc they know that that’ll change everything the moment they do. it’s such a testament to the writing AND the acting bc it’s the chemistry that bkpp have with one another that creates all of that push and pull dynamic, that yearning and desire. having to wait a whole week again is just devastating...i think next ep seems like it might be the climax?? i’m pretty sure it’ll be the ep where teh accepts his feelings (or at least won’t be able to hold himself back physically anymore), where all the build up finally properly erupts, but at the same time, i just know that the angst is going to start piling up and idk how to feel other than terrified bc i’m way too invested now tbh.

anyway, this drama is absolutely magnificent, and all i want to do is rave about how damn good it is. so high quality. it feels so fresh, like they’re reinvented the tried and true coming of age tale in a way, and we’re all just along for the ride. it transcends the typical thai BL story (and i now understand why they were hesitant to label this as BL when it really feels like it encompasses so much more than the usual BL tropes and story). one of my fave dramas of the year by far (BL or otherwise). it’s just a class apart from any drama i’ve watched before and ticks every single box for me. stunning in every way. down to every detail and every feeling and emotion. it’s so raw and real and i can’t praise what nadao and the team have done with this enough (and we still have 2 more eps to go!!). there’s just so much meaning in every little thing, and in all those little things you can see the time and care it’s taken them to make this.

[playingbaseballwithyourson]

A Comprehensive List of Why REFLEKDOLL is One of the BEST EPISODES

1. I mainly come to this show to watch Ladybug and Chat Noir bitch at each other for a solid 15-20 minutes and, my god, does this episode deliver.

2. “You’d better get going before you lose your clown costume.” I C O N I C.

3. For real, confirmation that Ladybug sees Chat as as much of a goddamn clown as the entire fanbase, it’s great. 

4. I know people get on this episode because the ladynoir banter is apparently “”mean-spirited””? But honestly like, banter between friends CAN sound this mean-spirited from an outward perspective while all the friends involved in it are totally fine and in complete understanding that it’s all just joking and in good fun. Ladybug really starts tearing into him (jokingly) and Chat still finishes the sequence by bouncing away yelling “SEE I WAS RIIIIIGHT!” in an upbeat, teasing tone. Like, they’re fine. This is just how they talk to each other as friends and it’s clear neither Ladybug nor Chat Noir take their banter very seriously. (Honestly my banter with my friends can be far more scathing than anything in this episode. XD)

5. Watching Juleka and Luka interact... It’s pure. It’s good. :’3 Just an all around good scene. It’s also nice to follow up on how Juleka’s been dealing with her issues since Reflekta, even though it does turn out she’s made very miniscule progress.

6. Alya’s galaxy brain moment of inviting Adrien to help Marinette with a fashion shoot: Makes a lot of sense and is a great way to capitalize on both the love square’s hobbies to get them to hang out more! It’s the single part of this episode that isn’t a contrivance! 

7. Adrienette look cute in the matching outfits. Sorry but they do.

8. Okay, the thing that is truly great about this episode is that everything about it is a massive contrivance to make the kwami swap happens. ML wants it’s fucking kwami swap and it’s going to bend over backwards to make it happen, and it is NOT shy about it and it is NOT sorry. And honestly?? I FUCKING LOVE THAT. Does a kwami swap make logical sense for it to occur without the heroes having planned for it? No. Are we going to do it anyway? YES!!!! BECAUSE A KWAMI SWAP WOULD BE FUCKING FUN!!! That’s what’s great about ML, and this episode is a great showcase of ML’s priorities as a cartoon (which is probably why this episode rubs some of the fandom the wrong way). A kwami swap is illogical, but it’s fun as fuck, so the show is going to do it. That’s the priority above all else. FUN. AND IT PAYS OFF!

Seriously, everything is a contrivance. Why akumatize Juleka again? Reflekta’s power can handicap the kwamis’ abilities to find their humans in the commotion. Why have Marinette and Adrien change for the photo shoot? Get them to take their miraculous off. Why have them keep the kwamis in the car instead of in their pockets? So they can’t find their own kwamis right away. This episode is jumping through flaming hoops to make this happen and it’s fucking gold. Might there have been a much more natural way to have a kwami swap? Yeah, sure, most likely. But literally WHO EVEN CARES cause this episode starts out fun and ends fun, and it works well enough that I don’t give a flumpty. Hell, I appreciate it even MORE for not being shy about its priorities in this episode. Kwami swap fun? Then kwami swap will happen. Fuck everything else.

9. “Are you okay, Marinette?” “YEAH. HE’S TOO HOT. I MEAN--” This is a top tier Marinette flub.

10. I recognize I’m a minority on this, but I fucking love Mayura. She is a goddamn queen. So gosh darn fabulous with the long coat and the fan. I just love it whenever she shows up so I’m glad she’s here. Makes the villains a touch more intimidating in this episode since there’s two, which pairs well with Marinette and Adrien being somewhat off their game due to the kwami swap.

11. Literally any time Tikki and Plagg interact together is great. 

12. Adrien telling Marinette to hide in the car... TTToTTT <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

13. No one ever believes me when I say Marinette is pure chaotic energy but she HECKING IS! When she finds Plagg with the cat ring, this girl does not waste a goddamn second. Will swapping powers probably mess them up? Yes, but FUCK IT PARIS IS IN DANGER AND WE NEED HEROES NOW SO GIMME THAT RING. SHE JUST DOES NOT WASTE A GODDAMN SECOND TRANSFORMING. SHE CAN TAKE ANYTHING AND ROLL WITH IT. I LOVE MARINETTE.

14. Also Ladynoire’s design is fucking choice.

15. Okay, go onto youtube right now, look up Mister Bug’s transformation sequence, and look at the way he puts on his mask.... I know right??? :D

16. This is a very personal thing, but I love seeing Adrien powered-up without the cat eyes. This is the only time you ever see it, and trust me while I fucking love the cat eyes, it’s a really eye-catching change to see him with his normal eyes here! Think about it, Ladybug has never seen her partner’s real eyes until this episode. It’s cool! (Marinette with the cat eyes, on the other hand, is neat as well, but I don’t think she wears them as well as Chat Noir.)

17. Adrien smacking himself with the yo yo.

18. I’ve said this before but I find it absolutely adorable how, when swapped, Marinette and Adrien base their new names off of each other, rather than making up new ones from scratch. Mister Bug? It’s Ladybug, but boy. Ladynoire? It’s Chat Noir, but girl. Seriously that’s adorable.

19. ADRIEN USING LUCKY CHARM AND GETTING EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTED IS ONE OF THE SINGLE FUNNIEST MOMENTS IN THE ENTIRE GODDAMN SHOW. I’M SORRY BUT IT IS. IT’S FUCKING HILARIOUS. JUST ADRIEN BY SHEER LUCK SCHOOLING MARINETTE WITH HER OWN POWER, AND THE COMPLETELY OFFENDED LOOK ON HER FACE AFTERWARDS-- IT’S PEAK ML COMEDY.

20. I’m not the first one to make this comparison, credit goes to @buggachat on that, but Marinette in this episode is like the parent trying to teach their kid how to drive but ends up flipping their shit the second their kid touches the gas pedal. And it’s fucking funny. X”D Marinette has a strong sense of responsibility along with an incredibly specific way of how she likes to do things as Ladybug. Her process is you battle the akuma, gather info about your opponent, use lucky charm at the exact right time that only she knows in order to take them down, and then capture the akuma and/or amok. Her routine is pretty broken in this episode, since it’s now Adrien who needs to do all those things, so that combined with Marinette’s acute awareness of Adrien being a Child Who Causes Problems On Purpose has her veerrryyy on edge this whole episode and it’s just fun to watch. Her asking Adrien if they should switch back, correcting him every time he mis-speaks about how to do Ladybug correctly. It’s not a side of Marinette we get to see every day!

21. Additionally, getting to watch her relax for once in a fight since she’s now in the canonical clown costume is wonderful. I love Marinette. I want good things for Marinette. Relaxation and fun are good. She’s got a lot on her shoulders so this episode is nice, especially with the s3 finale in context.

22. Yknow, I can very happily buy that chataclysm doesn’t work on sentimonsters, since it’s already been established that Miraculous magic can protect from chataclysm. (See: Miraculer)

23. I’ve written already about why Mister Bug wasn’t actually bad with the ladybug miraculous, so I’ll only touch on a couple of those points again. But it is weird to me how people cry about Mister Bug being shit at the ladybug miraculous when he’s so clearly not? He just has a lot of stuff to think about that he usually doesn’t have to worry about cause it’s not his job. When to use lucky charm, HOW to use lucky charm, when to use miraculous ladybug, capturing the akuma once it’s released, capturing the amok. He just quite literally never has to put thought into any of that so it’s pretty understandable that he doesn’t have a handle on it just, automatically. Meanwhile, Marinette doesn’t have a ton of extra things to think about with the cat miraculous, AND she’s canonically naturally talented with handling different miraculous, so it’s very believable that she’d be fine? I get people don’t like that cause they have a problem with Marinette (and any WOC) being competent in general, but she’s just a talented girl. We see her take and roll with anything to stop the villain in every episode of the show, so there’s not actually a reason for her to notably struggle with the cat miraculous. But hell, she actually DOES make things worse by chataclysming Reflekdoll, which might have not happened if she paused before just rushing in and using her power (after proudly declaring she is now the Team Clown). But it’s understandable that she didn’t predict the sentimonster to react how it did, and I can see Adrien making the same mistake, so eh. 

24. But my point is that in terms of this discourse, I think this episode is fine. It’s about Ladybug and Chat Noir learning that they’re both quite good and very comfortable in their default roles. She’s great at handling her job and he’s great at handling his. That’s a perfectly fine lesson for this episode, and it’s not super necessary for them BOTH to learn that their partner’s job is actually super hard! The episode starts with them teasing each other about their roles, and it ends with that little bit of conflict between them being eased away due to their experiences from the kwami swap. Chat Noir is still a clown, Ladybug still is too concerned with her usual responsibilities to spend a lot of time clowning with him in fights, and that’s okay. They both learn to relax about it. It’s a good lesson for them to learn about each other, and it feels natural for the show to spend some time exploring their dynamic as partner heroes! 

25. I actually fucking love how it’s established that the lucky charm works differently for different people. This episode BASICALLY CANONIZES that Marinette’s lucky charm is so insane because SHE HERSELF, IS SO INSANE. Adrien thinks much simpler (which I’ve written about how that’s not a bad thing in previous posts), so his lucky charm is just: You need a mirror? Okay, here’s a mirror. And it’s actually very fun and interesting to me that his ability to use his lucky charm was handicapped specifically becuase he’s only ever watched Marinette use it. Marinette’s lucky charms always yield wildly complicated plans, and that’s the exact thing she’s shouting at him the whole episode, so he expects it to be complicated and thus can’t figure out how to use the mirror. It’s only when they sit down and realize that they’ll have to think on Adrien’s level instead of Marinette’s that they figure out what to do with it! Marinette’s spent the whole episode basically backseat driving for him (understandably), so the fact that the resolution is her meeting Adrien at his own spot and working on his level instead of hers- It’s a good way to wrap the episode up! 

26. Duuzu.

27. dID HE JUST DAB?!?!

28. Oh my god he did. And people actually hate this episode, smh.

29. Marinette flirting with Chat Noir will always give me life, and we get so much of it in this episode! Her calling him Bugaboy is this perfect combo of flirtatious and teasing that’s just very on-brand ladynoir. It’s perfect in this episode for literally so many reasons that I don’t even have time to list them cause this essay is already really long.

30. Adrien and Marinette interacting with the others’ kwami? Wholesome. Marinette and Adrien reuniting with their kwamis? Very wholesome. They’re both so attached to their kwamis in different ways, and they’re also together with their kwamis practically every waking moment of their lives. I can imagine being apart from them even for a little must’ve been a touch anxiety inducing, so it’s nice to see how sweet everyone is when they’re reuniting!

31. Adrien says at the end that he’s not cut out to be Ladybug and honestly y’all... That’s okay. Adrien has his role and he’s incredibly good at his role, and Ladybug is incredibly good at hers. They’re both SATISFIED with their roles. He’s not upset when he says he’s not cut out to be Ladybug, not even a little. He very happily takes Plagg back and steps back into his usual territory. Again, he wasn’t bad at the ladybug miraculous. It just came with more to think about than he really wants to, things that Ladybug is very HAPPY to think about, and if their dynamic already works, then he’s perfectly happy to focus on his part and leave her job to her. That’s great!!!

32. Juleka getting to do the fashion shoot... Yay. :’D I just want good things for Juleka.

In conclusion, this episode is pure unbridled fun from start to finish. It’s chaotic, it’s got top tier banter, it’s a phenomenal change of pace from the rest of the series. I actually love watching this episode with folks for the first time because seeing the look of complete shock and glee on their face as Marinette grabs that cat ring from Plagg is just FUN! And at the end of the day, this episode is a statement on three things:

- Marinette is a talented girl. -Adrien is great at his job. - And ML as a show’s priority will always, first and foremost, be fun.

And none of those are a bad thing. 

Hope you enjoyed the essay! :D

[the-ethereal-serpent]

Types Of Hauntings

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Residual Haunting Activity

​Residual haunting activity can occur when something traumatic/stressful occurs, such as a murder. Negative energy is literally blasted into the atmosphere, causing the atmosphere to imprint or record the events. Like a recording tape, it will play the events over and over again. The entities involved in this residual haunting activity are unaware of their surroundings. This is not an intelligent haunting, there is no interaction between you and the entity.

Residual haunting activity can also be caused by positive energy blasted into the atmosphere. Many times you have heard ghost stories, where people can hear the sounds of a party. They hear music, singing, dancing, laughter and when they enter the room where they hear the party, there is no one there. Residual haunting activity can be the specters of living beings.

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Poltergeist Activity

​Poltergeist is from a German word meaning noisy spirits. Reports of poltergeists date back to Ancient Roman times. The activity that takes place will start off with knocks and bangs, furniture starting to move around by itself. Then the activity will become more intense, manifesting itself through voices and even the appearance of full apparitions. Furniture may slide across the room and beds may shake. Many shows are based on this type of haunting because it tends to be the most terrifying and rarest type of haunting that occurs.

Most of the time, in the case of a poltergeist, the haunting circles around a female in her teen years. Some of these cases seem to be caused by the female unknowingly controlling the energy around herself. Some cases happen around people that are stable and in the right mind space. This haunting is hard to classify due to certain situations. No two are ever really the same. Most of the time you will find that one person in the house seems to be more affected by the haunting than anyone else.

It may seem that most of the activity doesn’t happen unless that certain person is present. Usually , the activity appears to stop when that person leaves the home. The majority of the time poltergeists are experienced by several people, but again they seem to center around one certain person. This person may be highly stressed as of late or maybe this person has gone through some type of extreme emotional situation. If this is the case, see that the individual involved gets some medical care, and soon afterwards the poltergeist will subside.

When it is not the teenager that is manifesting activity there are usually several spirits in the area. The spirits appear to pool their energy together in order to become strong enough to move larger objects and make more noises. In order to remedy the situation, you need to find the root of their anger so that they can pass over and leave you in peace. On most poltergeist cases they will disappear with out any warning, just as they appeared.

Certain times it may stop within a few days, other times it may take years. you may never know the reason that it happened. Most people are just happy to see it go and that’s enough for them. By understanding why it was there in the first place helps you to understand how to keep it from ever coming back again. Knowledge is the key in protecting yourself.

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Demonic Activity

Demons are entities that never had a mortal human form. Origins: Extraterrestrial. Why? If you believe that God and his angels are from the ‘heavens’, that would make them extraterrestrial. If Satan and 1/3 of the angels rebelled against God’s Kingdom, then Satan and 1/3 of the angels that became demons are also extraterrestrial. That is why they never had mortal human form. Einstein said that E = MC2. Energy can be converted into matter and matter into energy. Demons are pure energy entities. They are described in three different ways.

1. As angelic, a being of beauty that will manipulate the person to commit something that is sinful or out of the ordinary.

2. Horrific, evil looking. Some people claim, they have seen demons that are incredibly hideous to look at. I believe demons do this for a scare effect, they know what we fear and this is not their true appearance.

3. Black mist, black fog, black shadow, black smoke. Most demonic hauntings, the occupants claim to be followed by black mist or black fog.

They are usually very easy to identify as long as they are not hiding. When it is a demonic haunting you typically notice a revolting stench similar to rotted flesh or sulfuric acid. They often let loose a growl that sounds like it is coming from everywhere at once. They like to make contact by pushing, shoving, hitting and even scratching. The whole air in the affected area will feel thick like fog and the temperature will drastically change, typically becoming warmer.

These creatures are very strong, unlike human spirits, and they don’t mind showing it. There have been cases where people have been thrown through the air and even attacked. Apparently, their main goal is to break down a person’s free will in order to makeway for possession. This can take days, months or years, but time is of no concern to them. They have a hatred for mankind that dates back to the days of God and Lucifer.

They have lived for millennia and will be here long after we are gone. So, you must understand that though you may be able to get these creatures to leave a dwelling with religious provocation, you will never destroy them. They could go to the next place down the road if they choose, most likely they won’t because distance is not an issue for these creatures. They could go from Maine to California on a thought.

Demons are capable of changing form right in front of you from a human form to an inhuman form. They are neither male nor female, but can change to meet their needs. People mostly see demons as black masses standing in doorways or near rooms. Sometimes they are called shadow devils.

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Intelligent/Interactive Activity

​Back to Einstein’s theory. As matter beings, we are all energy beings on the quantum level. We are made up of atoms and neutrons. As matter/energy beings we have intelligence. While we live, we have an energy aura that surrounds our living bodies. This aura is created by the millions of electrical currents that are created through our bodies. Our brains creates brain waves, a form of pure energy that is transmitting our thoughts, what we see, what we feel, etc.

When our mortal form dies, the aura that constantly surrounds our bodies, leaves our bodies. We lose 6 ounces on the instance of death. What is this 6 ounces? Perhaps it is energy leaving our body. Our soul. This energy, the aura, or you may even call it your soul, is carrying the information of what we used to be.

If it can do this, then why couldn’t it also carry our intelligence? If it can carry our former intelligence of our previous life, then it should be able to interact with us intelligently. When we see this aura, we call it a ghost. If this ghost is able to interact with us, is aware of us, can touch us, can communicate with us, then this is an intelligent/interactive haunting. 

Some reasons the ghost may be tied to the site or people :

Died as a result of a traumatic event, murder, car accident, etc.

Due to unfinished business.

The spirit may have died suddenly and not realized he/she died.

The living loved ones are so emotionally distraught they can’t let go.

The spirit is emotionally connected to their loved ones.

They cannot rest due to an injustice done to them.

Fear of the other side or judgment

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Shadow People or Shadow Creatures

​This is a type of haunting activity that has no real explanation. They are different from ghosts. They are usually shapeless dark masses. Mostly seen with your peripheral vision. They are known to do things that are different from ghosts. They can move between walls, they have no human features, they wear no clothes (except for the hat man/hooded figure shadow creatures). People who encounter them, have a feeling of dread.

Clairvoyants that encounter Shadow People, say they do not feel they are human and consider them non-human. Shadow People have no discernible mouth, noses or facial expressions. Some are seen as child sized dark humanoids. Some people say they seem to be made up of dark smoke or dark steam. At times when they move, they appear to be moving on an invisible track from one place to another, such as a toy train on a small scale railroad track. They have been seen to hop or what appears to be a strange dance. They are known to stare at the floor. 

Two common types of Shadow People are the ‘hat man’, that looks like he or she is wearing a 1930s fedora hat and the ‘hooded figure’, which looks like the shadow person has a hood over their head. The hood and hat stand out as clothing, but otherwise, they are not wearing any clothing at all. There are also reports of shadow animals, such as a shadow in the form of a cat, with no discernible mouth, nose or eyes. 

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Portal Hauntings

​Portals aren’t really a new concept, as we’ve seen them in a lot of sci-fi flicks. But in the real world portal hauntings are considered controversial as there is little known and the idea is mostly theory or speculation. Portals are thought to be doorways to another world or dimension in which entities travel through. 

It’s speculated that portals are not limited to one location, region or limited to sacred ground. Typically places that experience a wide array of different types of anomalous activity such as glowing balls of light, odd creatures, strange shapes, or unexplained mists or fog, are suspected to have a portal in which these energies are traveling back and forth.

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Note From Lluna

When it comes to the demon section, I know there are quite a few Pagans that work with Lucifer and demons and believe they are not evil. I don't know much beyond that, but I just want to add that this article is from the writers perspective and other perspectives must be considered as well.

Also, you need to remember that not all spirits are evil or negative. Many are neutral or positive and can assist you in your craft and even protect you from other harmful entities.

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Article Source : https://hauntedoc.com/types-of-hauntings/]

[tohruhondaismydaughter]

I've just discovered there's people who hate Kakeru. Not dislike or don't get the hype about him but genuinely seem to hate him. Now obviously personal preferences are a thing but I seriously don't get where this hate could be coming from because with

1. Akito- phyically assaults people (including kids), held a teenager hostage for daiting & trying to take a box of her's that Akito already knew was empty & also stabbed someone after they tried to help her & left them to potentially die

2. Shigure- regularly makes perverted "jokes" about people who are underage (including the 16 year old girl who lives with him & cleans/cooks for him + he's family) & admits to manipulating everyone around him for he's own selfish goal regardless of how it could hurt others & that he dosn't really care about being kind even to the people he supposedly loves + he likes messing with people he knows are already terribly anxious & he also won in the end while never having to actually sacrifice anything important to him or really learn anything of value

3. Ayame- abounded he's brother to abuse till he was almost 30 & says various inappropriate things in front of & towards High Schoolers

4. Kagura- pretended to love someone 3 years younger then her who she saw as beneath her in a violent (though it was obviously in out-dated slap stick) way until she was like 18 & then slaps Tohru so hard she becomes uncounsious

5. Kureno- enabler of Akito despite no longer being supernaturally bound to her & knowingly fell for a High Schooler

6. Hatori- enabler of Akito & erasers people's memories when told to regardless of how he knows it'll hurt others

7. Katsuya- knowingly married (& later impregnated) isolated & homeless 15 year old Kyoko when he was in he's 20's after meeting her as a teacher in her middle school

8. Ren- everything about her

9. Kyo's sperm donor- everything about him

10. Momiji's parents- how they handled the situation

11. Machi's mum- raised her daughter like a robot, replaced her, insulted her entire personality, acussed her of attempted murder with bassically zero evidence, kicked her out of her home, cut her off from her sibling & only ocasnially calls to insult her leading to her developing a rather unhealthy coping mechanism to deal with her damaged mental health

12. Machi & Kakeru's dad- cheated on his wife, made he's kids fight over thier inheritance before getting another child & then treating the first two like they no longer exsisted

13. Kakeru's mum- took years to realise that she shouldn't use her child to get money/power from an affair

14. Haru- got a little too insistent about phyical affection from someone who he knows is super emotinally scarred (I still love him though just don't think certain scenes with Rin were handeld as delicately as they probably should have been) & can get rather harsh to random people when he goes dark (the worse case of this being when he grabbed Tohru's arm)

15. Rin's parents- belong in hell

16. The Sohma maids (especially the old one)- are part of the reason Akito became as messed up as she did + just straight up seem to not view kids or the zodiac as human beings with thier own feelings or rights

17. Uo's mum- straight up abounded her young daughter after getting into a new relationship

18. Yuki & Ayame's mum- narsastic, dismissive, controlling, litrually sold one of her kids to thier abuser in exchange for wealth/status, never apologised or even acknowledged what she had done

19. Akira- pursued a relationship pretty much out of pure lonleyness, went along with the suppression of Akito's biological gender, didn't do enough to protect Akito from he's wife's abuse (though in he's defense he was incredible sickly), last few things he told he's child before dying was that he was glad he had her as proof of he's relationship with Ren (AKA the person that had made it clear to Akito that she hated her guts) & that she was special due to being god & her bond with the zodiac was her birth right & would always be there (leading Akito to obviously feeling possessive & intilted over the zodiac & base her entire identity on her position as their god)

20. Kyoko- neglected infant Tohru for months due to her depression after Katuya's death & was even planning on killing herself to be with him again before finally coming to her senses (I love her & I tottally get why she did what she did but if it weren't for gramps little Tohru would have been in one hell of bad situation)

21. The Yuki Fan Club- just thier entire attitude towards Yuki & any girl that interacts with him (I get that it's obviously a delibretly over the top anime gag but irl the way they behave would be seriously disturbing & I'm pretty sure might even be illegal now what with all the photos taken of Yuki without he's knowledge)

22. The former school president- he's creepy fravriotisim towards Yuki (& later he's son) & he's flat out harrasing of anyone wearing the school uniform in a none tradishinal way or anyone with an unusual hair colour (despite him bassically admitting that the school officials had already said that Momiji, Haru & Kyo's appearances were ok)

23. Kimi- I like her & she's obviously iconic but honestly the way she treats Machi kind of borders on bullying sometimes for me

24. Hiro- he's a child & I like him but when we first met him you can't deny he was being a grade A shit to Tohru, Kisa & everyone else (& he fucks up again with Tohru during the beach arc)

25. Rin- love her so much but the first time she met Tohru she did try to kick her in the head while in her horse form which you know isn't great & she was rather antagonistic towards Yuki for no real vaild reason

26. Kyo- using Yuki as a scape goat he's entire life even when he knew none of the terrible things that had happened to him were actually he's fault, hurting Tohru in he's true form (I get that he wasn't in he's right mind & was suffering greatly but it still wasn't good) & rejecting Tohru after everything they had been through in the way that he did (again he wasn't in he's right mind & was suffering greatly but it's still an incredibly low blow & I think he knew that as he tragically wanted to hurt her, similar to what he did in the true form scene, badly enough that she would finally choose to give up on him)

27. The entire zodiac (outside of Kagura & maybe Momiji)- it is revealed that the zodiac are supernaturally inclined to look down on the cat & that they know about Kyo's tragic fate yet do not plan on trying to stop it from happening as he's suffering is thier one true reprieve in the curse as no matter what happens to them they will never be as "low down" as the cat yet once the curse finally breaks for everybody almost nobody even thinks to apologises to Kyo for how he was made to be an outsider since birth

28. Naohito- decides to hate Yuki out of jelousy because he has feelings for Motoko (who clearly has feelings for Yuki) despite Yuki showing no romantic feelings for Motoko & barley sharing any kind of connection with her at all which is obviously not fair as just because you happen to be liked by someone who is liked by someone else dosn't mean you should have to except being seen as a bad person (especially as in Yuki's case he never tried to encourage Motoko's obsession with him & in fact barley notices her exsistance as they aren't in any of the same social circles & she follows the ridiculous club rule of not speaking to him without another fan club member present)

29. Yuki- rather judgmental over how others choose to present themselves in regards to gender norms

30. Momiji- I love him but he did try to take advange of Tohru not knowing how old he really was to bath with her & did actually mange to use this fact to sleep along side her one night before she found out how old he actually was (now obviously Momiji is a wonderfully kind person & clearly would never actually do anything to hurt Tohru but let's be real if someone did that to you irl you'd be pretty creeped out & understandably have a hard time trusting them again)

31. Yuki & Ayame's father- has always been complety missing from he's kids lives (& even seemingly he's wive's) despite being mentioned to be still alive & well enough to work

32. Uo's dad- getting dumped for someone else must suck especially when your left with a young child & I know he did eventually clean up he's act but there's no changing the fact that he's years as an alcholic messed up Uo really bad & could have led to her death if Kyoko hadn't stepped in

33. Kazuma- I know he had good intentions & I love him but there's no denying that he did ignore Kyo's right to free will when he removed he's bracelet & though the plan ended up making he's life better if it had gone wrong in any way then Kyo had pretty much admitted (at least to himself) in S2E9 that he would have probably killed himself that night which would have clearly destroyed Tohru

34. Kyo's mum - she was obviously treated terribly by her husband & I do feel sorry for her but her way of dealing with the situation really damaged Kyo

Your really telling me that the character you have the most issues with is a boy who said a few horrible things to the MC when he was 15 in service of someone he loved who was in pain, got told by said loved one that what he'd said was wrong, felt bad about it, befriended a lonley teen that was close to the MC, quickly grew to genuinely care about them & made them come out of thier shell, wanted to help he's half sister but knew he wasn't really the right person for the job, realised that he's new friend was, encouraged the friend & he's sister's growing connection, learned how good of a person the MC has been to he's new friend, admits to he's friend that he'd been horrible to the MC in the past but just dosn't know how to go about rectifying it (especially as she dosn't seem to remember him), introduces he's friend to he's GF (further expanding the friend's positive social circle), finally bumps into MC alone & is shocked to find out that she dose now in fact remember him & even appoliges to him + thanks him for bringing her friend out of thier shell before he comes to he's senses & assures her that she has nothing to apologise for & then visits her in the hospital when she gets injured & even goes shopping for a gift to give her beforehand (even if he dosn't end up getting her something that actually fits her personality because well duh he dosn't really know anything about her).

Out of every questionably moral thing in the series this is really the hill you wanna die on?

I just honestly can't understand it. Sure he's not perfect but then no one in the series is. That's kind of the entire point of the story, that anyone can do things that hurt people but that it's what you choose to do going forward (even if it takes you a long time) that's important & Kakeru, eventually, chose to try to do the right thing. He tried to understand Yuki even though the guy didn't seem to like him at all, he chose to check up on Machi even though she seemingly hadn't made any sign of wanting to deepen thier sibling bond, he chose to finally talk to Tohru instead of continuing the ruse that he'd never spoken to her before, he chose to come clean about what happened to Yuki despite the potential of ending their friendship (& you can't tell me once he'd realised how much Yuki cared for Tohru the very real possibility that Yuki might hate him if he found out what he'd said to her wouldn't worry him at all) & he chose to visit Tohru in the hospital instead of just wishing Yuki luck or hoping Kormaki would go so he could avoid feeling uncomfortable.

You don't have to love him or even like him but I really don't think he deserves this amount of hate (especially incomparsion to some of the other characters I've listed).

[tekkai]

🅿 Here's your official pass to gush about headcanons for CP-9 (ft. your insert as well if you want)! Go wild!

Thank you Anon I love you for asking. I wasn’t able to go in depth for everyone so I focussed on the few my S/I is closest with. ;^; 

Lucci 

Lucci is an impossibly light sleeper and grows irritable due to his disrupted sleep schedule. He’s seldom able to sleep soundly through the night and attempts to recover by napping throughout the day. 

With the extremely specific and conscious exception of chicken, he is offended if you try to serve him any kind of fowl/poultry. He has a strong preference towards ‘red’ meats such as beef, lamb, and even game such as venison.

Obsession by Calvin Klein, or the closest in-universe alternative. In addition to bathing in Civetone, he carries the scent of brandy and sawdust. 

Hattori is more than a mascot, he is Lucci’s service animal. Most of his task serve to mitigate Lucci’s psychological needs. Among other tasks, ventriloquism is part of his work, as it allows Lucci to interact with new people in a roundabout way. Hattori can also ‘sweep’ rooms, alerting him to be certain a space is empty and easing his hypervigilance. Disrupting night terrors and providing sensory stimuli when his feeling overloaded. 

In canon we know they’ve been a team for at least 24 years. I would like to believe they’ve been together longer, prior to his arrival. I’ve thought a lot about a possible backstory for him, but we’ve been given so little in canon for me to work with it’s purely speculation. 

His father had been a no-name pirate. He left shortly after conception and the two never had any kind of relationship save for their genetics. Ironically he’d be killed by his son later in life. 

His mother was a lesser noble with a daughter from a previous marriage. As a baby he was close to his-sister,but he was so young when they died their memories are distorted. He blames the death of his family on the cowdarce of their appointed guard when their city was besieged. This is the root of his philosophy. 

Racing pigeons were an important culturally and Hattori is a descendant from his mother’s line of birds. 

Lucci is nearly legally blind. He is completely dependent on his contacts to get through the day. Caught without them however, not many people would be able to tell how much he struggles. He’s practiced in hiding his vulnerabilities and can get by without assistance by leveraging his other instincts, but he does struggle. The fact that his eye color changes significantly every time he appears is due to his colored lenses.  

Lucci was given the epithet of Massacre Weapon and conditioned to see himself as a tool. He holds himself to an impossible standard and values his worth based solely on his objective usefulness. 

He would never admit it to anyone, but he identifies with the local stray cats. Wherever he locates he makes a point to feed and look after the ferals in the area. He’s absolutely blown his cover once or twice confronting anyone stupid enough to harass a colony he’d been overlooking. 

Lucci honestly believes he’s working towards a more peaceful world. He does have a ravenous bloodlust, but if that was his only need, he’s strong enough to go rogue.  Lucci does not need his license to kill. The only reason he’s remained complaint to the WG’s needs is because they align with his own vision. 

Kaku

Kaku and Usopp both originated in the East Blue, have a natural affinity for working ships and are canonically mistaken for one another. I’m not about to claim a direct relation but I don’t think distant cousins would be out of the question or improbable. Kaku was an orphan taken in by WG and underwent intense programing to model him into the agent he is today. It would be reasonable to assume any record of his life before the government got a hold of him would be purged. I don’t think it’ll ever be a plot point but I just like this theory. 

Kaku may be the next young prodigy of the group, but he is also the designated baby/baby brother. As an unit it’s just universally accepted that he get’s a ‘pass’, especially in regards to Lucci. 

Ussop was able to antagonize Lucci twice after the the Leopard Man had brutalized others for less. It’s a subconscious reaction adn Lucci probably doesn’t even realize why his first instinct wasn’t to kill this pirate the moment he drew his weapon. 

He’s an effective agent but he get’s emotionally attached to places and people. Unlike Lucci who finds ideological satisfaction in his work, Kaku is loyal to CP9 due to his relationship with his colleagues. For this reason he’s a more efficient spy. 

Kaku has an aversion to alcohol. He’ll drink socially but only if it’s pushed on him.

An avid outdoorsmen. Kaku would spend everyday in the wilderness if he could get away with it. He has a secret cabin he escapes to and uses to decompress after an excessively stressful mision. 

Horses love him. Every since he was a child he’s been a natural with horses and no one can figure out why. They just instinctively adore him.

Jabra

Incredibly sensitive to chemical scents. He refuses to enter the laboratory for this very reason. 

I’ve touched on Zoan’s influencing their users in regards to Lucci before, and Jabra is no exception. Unlike Lucci however he’s happy to lean into his instincts and takes great pride in being a wolf. 

Makes really terrible dog puns. 

He prideful and arrogantly confident, but once his audience has left he’s painfully lonely. He craves a ‘pack’ and is hopeless romantic at heart. Has bounced from one failed relationship to another near constantly. 

He cares deeply about his fellow agents and views them as a kind of family.

He’s the first to throw insult or a playful jab, but the moment something is wrong he can tell. Jabra can be a jerk but he’s the best person to talk to if someone needs to vent or be comforted by. 

Claims it’s nonsense but he’s extremely superstitious. If Kalifa makes a comment about the stars aligning he makes note. 

Angel’s self proclaimed older brother.

He’s competitive to a fault. It doesn’t matter what the challenge is he needs to be the best. 

Found his Rooster as an abandoned chick and has been raising it ever since. He’s a proud father and carries photos of the bird when it can’t accompany him specifically so he can show his son off. This tactic has never once worked while he was trying to flirt with someone. 

Kalifa

She’s mildly allergic to animal fur. It’s nothing significant but she’s forced to carry allergy pills when she’s working with her Zoan colleagues. Her new abilities, however, have been a godsend in keeping the annoying fur at bay.  

More so than any of the other agents she struggles with feeling ‘good enough’. Having been born into her role she feels an immense pressure to live up to the expectation that were set for her.

Her mother was also a government agent at one point.

Collects ‘lamb’ themed objects. She doesn’t love having to be around actual farm animals (and despises Jabra’s rooster) but she finds the artistic representations of lambs aesthetically pleasing. 

Is secretly really into astrology. She’s complied full birth charts on her co-workers using what little information is available and reasonable estimating the unknowns. 

She is extensively musical trained and is by far the most talented agent in that regard. 

Angel

Not a Ciphor Pol agent. Not a government agent. Not even a marine. But since you were kind enough to include her, she’ll get a guest feature.

Angel was blessed with a powerful fruit but cursed with the lack of willpower to use it properly.

She can be friendly but it takes a long time before she can fully trust someone. 

Used the name Lucifer before settling down and trying to start a new life for herself.

She descended from the upper vearths and is confused when people down here talk about religion. To her “God” is an epithet you can earn and a position of power in the sky islands. She’d interacted with Enel and caught wind that he’d ascended and is thoroughly confused every time someone makes an offhand religious comment or sees an act of devotion, ‘cause god is kind of prick?’. She’s never commented on her confusion. When her wedding was planned to take place in a chapel she was horrified for reasons that weren’t clear to anyone else present.

Since that was the only part she had an objection to the planner in charge caved and re-scheduled the event to an outdoor venue.  

Terribly pyrophobic. Ironically the devil is not okay around an open flame. 

[jisssooyah]

Hi you... if you were going to curate a little season of films for me, which ones would you choose and why? They don't need to be horror, I'm just curious what you would choose 🌸

I don’t know if you’ll like these movies, or if you’ve already watched them, but after i watched these films, i felt like they might need to belong to you now. i hope they make you smile, roll your eyes, and cry just as much as i did.

1. city of god (2002): this is one of the most immersive and gorgeously shot films i’ve ever seen. it’s set in rio de janeiro during the 60s and spans decades exploring the drug culture in the slums and how this can affect kids just as they are trying to figure their own selves out. the way this film is shot, feels like you were at the sea with them as the sand crunched underneath your feet. but the way that the director captures these individuals, makes you so fucking relieved that you don’t live through any of the circumstances that they go through. 

2. the dreamers (2004): set in 1968, this film follows three students in Paris who come of age and explore one another and their limits during the revolution. while these students prop themselves up as individuals obsessed with sex, running underneath themselves is a current of jealousy, obsession, and blurred familial relationships that made me increasingly uncomfortable. you find yourself feeling bad for the children, and ultimately upset at their upbringing because of their parents. 

3. if beale street could talk (2018): this movie is based off of james baldwin’s titular 1974 novel. in it, the director expertly and vigorously explores love: a love that feels so real that it hurts. the cast is what sold this film to me. the way they talk, laugh, cry, and smile at one another is achingly beautiful and terrifyingly sad. i wanted to transport myself back to their time period and watch the main characters fall in love because the film didn’t seem like enough. 

4. the neon demon (2016): this film follows an emerging model who sacrifices herself to the demands of the industry in order to be attractive and beautiful. there are so many stunning colors in this film that it makes you dizzy, like you’re in a trance and that’s what this world is for the main character: a trance. as she oscillates between reality and fantasy, her world and the characters in it, increasingly seek out to alter her personality. 

5. death becomes her (1992): a deliberately ultra-campy parody of trashy, pandering "women's pictures," soap operas and paperbacks from the '80s and '90s. The three leads all do some of their best work - it's hilarious watching Meryl Streep play a terrible actress, Goldie Hawn is particularly hilarious during her character's cat lady phase, and all around just a really fun and eccentric film. 

6. princess cyd (2017): i can’t think of anything to write for this but i just wanna say that this is literally one of the most pleasant movie experiences i’ve ever had. so much light and genuine interaction in warm sun rays radiating positive energy and an openness that is far too uncommon in movies nowadays. people talk, people connect, people grow bonds and are allowed to be sexual or intimate or personal without an air of shame or judgement. just pure kind and curious human association. 

7. spiderman: into the spiderverse (2018): the message of Spider-Verse is not "gentrify yourself! stop expressing your personality and just conform to what society wants you to be!" After all, what makes you different makes you Spider-Man, and Miles' final expression of himself as a superhero still retains much of his personality and individuality...they're just being used in more productive and fulfilling ways. It's the little things that drive the point home, like noticing that the title page for Miles' finished Great Expectations essay has been stylistically doodled and colored like street art. Rather than seeing his artistic gifts as an opposition to his schoolwork, Miles infuses them together to make the best of the hand he's been dealt.

8. my life as a zucchini (2016): initially heartbreaking and sad, but slowly becoming more joyful and heartwarming as the plot moves along. The film really feels like it captures the essence and child like wonder of these kids, all of them going through hardships but managing to find something to help each other out. It’s so refreshing to see the actual orphanage portrayed in a more positive light, not the usual horrid dump that a lot of lesser movies play them out as. The animation is stunning. One of the best uses of stop motion I’ve seen, everything is so colourful and detailed. There’s some moments set in snowy mountains and these look incredible. There’s clearly been so much love and care put into each and every scene here. The music too, sounds spectacular, it really works well with each scene. 

9. lovesong (2016): Mindy and Sarah have that type of relationship where they don't need words because they speak in a language made out of glances and touches. This movie is about the fear of ruining a meaningful friendship and losing an important person, about love that is so complicated that one might not even try because the outcome seems to be so obvious.

10. her (2013): Heartbreak is formative: it changes you heart side out, and leaves your muscles a little stronger, your skin a little thicker, your bones easier to repair. Before this film, I’d never seen anything constructive in having your insides pulled apart by the seams by another person, but this film taught me how. Being in love and then being forced out of it is an experience that changes you fundamentally, but Her taught me its purpose – you don’t need them to leave you so that you can find someone who’s a better fit, because perhaps you never will. You need it to participate in humanity. The common denominator is being hurt, and without it, you’re barely alive.

11. shoplifters (2018): bittersweet and richly transportive, Shoplifters is a film that nonchalantly eases you into its tragic beauty in a way that doesn't punch you hard until the end. It simultaneously made me want to be part of the film's world and also very glad that I'm not. The setting the characters live in is messy and cluttered and full of dysfunction and lies, but it's also got family, and laughter, and fist-bumps, and slurping warm noodles while rain pings on the tin rooftop. So nuanced, so many tiny moments of delicate beauty and unassuming heartbreak, so many people making terrible decisions with good intentions.

12. god’s own country (2017): though it is a love story between two men, this aspect is only addressed briefly in a single scene. Rather, the film is about finding someone who makes you want to be a better person, someone who comes into your life just when you needed it most. Gheorghe helps Johnny open up and realize the beauty of the simple life. From this relationship, Johnny begins to feel comfortable with expressing himself, and his love and gratitude towards others. He also begins to appreciate life in the country, surrounded by stunning landscapes and the beauty of simplicity. Addressing the Yorkshire countryside, Gheorghe says "It is beautiful, but lonely." Johnny is presented with the notion that he doesn't have to be cold and miserable, slaving and drinking his days away. He is presented with the possibility of no longer being alone and finally finding happiness and contentment - and it is more than gratifying to see him accept it.

13. disobedience (2017): a tender star-crossed daydream. the three main character dynamics are special enough on their own, but the romance that blooms at the center is cathartically intimate and even magical: a reunion that feels so inevitable. catching glimpses of a past life, details we aren’t privy to. all the stolen kisses and whispers and promises. a bond so strong that they fall back in sync with each other like second nature, even if they try to fight against it. even if it won’t work. and yet they choose each other, even if for a few minutes.

14. raw (2016): this film is so gross and I like that. There is tons of blood and unique body horror and it all works perfectly for the tone the film is attempting to set. The use of color, specifically neons, creates a constant feeling that you are traveling through some sort of weird ghost world, which I really like. Overall, it's a very well put together film with flashes of brilliance.

15. the night is short, walk on girl (2017): what an absolutely magical adventure of a film. Essentially this is a heavily episodic look at a night in the lives of several people, centered on a woman and a man as she gleefully floats from event to event while he neurotically obsesses over how to "coincidentally" talk to her. The storytelling is incredible; while the overarching narrative is simple there are countless threads woven together to connect everyone in the story to each other. That in itself is a big theme: connections between people, how everything is interrelated, and what a large impact seemingly insignificant things people do can have an impact on everyone around them.

16. coraline (2009): Coraline is the best stop motion movie ever made in my opinion. Before the film released in 2009, I read the book and was completely blown away by its creativity and story. It’s a pretty dark tale featuring many scenes of fright that work well in both a horror setting and an animated kids setting. On surface value, this film is quite horrifying, which is something I’ve always loved about it. While it does make a few minor changes to the book, it improves upon a piece of art that was already jaw-droppingly good. Coraline feels like a real little girl with some real problems. She’s selfish but likable which is something most films cannot translate well. Of course, she has a pretty awesome arc as well which brings this movie to a perfect close for her character. The other-mother is also perfectly done. She is almost exactly how I imagined her in the book and the animation on her is spookily gorgeous. There is not one dull moment in this film. It is literally a perfect piece of cinema.

17. the third wife (2019): haven’t seen a film this visually delicate in a while. Ash Mayfair works with the looming mountain surroundings to make her characters —these women, these girls— as small as possible, as isolated as possible. Uneasiest of all is the protagonist May, so young and so weighed by responsibility, her position blurs between being one of the wives and being one of the daughters. It’s an extremely bleak tale of circumstance. An old tale, certainly, but so beautifully crafted it doesn’t matter. Mayfair holds a fearful tension throughout, and it only ever shatters in the cruelest of ways.The abundance of women and display of sisterhood begin as a comfort, but horror takes over as we realize how conditional and fragile that comfort is. Even the daughters are subconsciously aware, one of them praying to the gods to grow up and become a man, shearing her hair off in naive triumph. It’s a doomed cycle of girls performing roles which are unfortunately their best option, right up until the final scene of May with her daughter, still in their mourning clothes. She, like the older wives, finally realizes they’re the same as the cattle laying on their side for too many days.

[silverbastardgoldenfool]

Realm of the Elderlings Ask Meme Thing

Created by @hermitknut and brought back by @elderling-magic

Thanks @blackandwhitemotley for tagging me :) this is gonna be unnecessarily long because I’m a messy bitch with too many feelings and not enough brain cells

Favourite RotE Book: God it’s impossible to choose properly so let’s just go with the one that always gives me flashbacks when I see it on my bookshelf: Golden Fool

Why: I was already deeply obsessed at this point and had laughed, cried and panicked countless times throughout the series BUT Golden Fool stands out because of the Fitz/Fool confrontation which all but gave me a panic attack. Sure, I’ve been overly invested in book characters my whole life but the fact I was like physically fuckin sweating just because these guys were having a verbal fight, which had nothing to do with the actual plot, is fuckin wild my dude. Also despite my distress I was thrilled in a way because I never expected Robin to address the homoerotic tension in the actual text - and I was even more impressed that she makes the Fool the winner in this fight. You feel for him (ouch!!!!!!!!) but he gets the last word and the whole time you’re on his side and wishing Fitz would just keep his goddamn mouth shut (unless he’s gonna use it to kiss the Fool). She makes you empathise with the Fool without compromising his dignity, without making him a pathetic pining gay stereotype. He is hurt, he is human, but Fitz is the fool in this exchange (forgive the unintentional pun). It’s crazy how this one scene defines this whole huge book for me but it overwhelmingly does. Man it fucked me up.

Top Three Favourite Characters: I’m excluding Fitz, the Fool and Nighteyes cos that’s just a given honestly and there are too many incredible characters to choose from. Also I’m going to choose three characters I think are exceptional on a technical level since that’s the easiest way for me to pick a few out.

1. Burrich - Forever fascinating to me because I disagree with him probably more often than not AND YET I love him so much. It’s seriously like I have the same relationship with him that Fitz does - and/or the same relationship many of us have with father figures. That weird thing where you can fundamentally disagree on some pretty important stuff, and he makes a lot of mistakes and probably irrevocably fucked you up in a lot of ways but you can’t help but love him because you know he’s not doing anything from a place of malice or pettiness or selfishness. He simply knows what he believes and is righteous to a fault. He’s always doing his best - whatever that looks like to him. There are so many things he says or does that make me amazed that I don’t hate him. I think in another series he is the kind of character I would hate. The fact that Robin makes me love him - and conflicted about that love - is a marvel.

2. Malta - I won’t harp on about this too much because we all know the deal. Malta’s early POVs were a tween nightmare. I had to skim them because they were so viscerally irritating. I guess it’s a huge testament to the writing that it really did feel like you were stuck in a tween girl’s head; the problem is that is the worst hell imaginable. It’s an even greater testament to the writing that, through some of the most masterful character development I have ever witnessed, you actually end up loving this girl.

3. Kennit - He’s such a monster that I hate actually saying he’s one of my favourite characters but it’s true. Especially from a writing perspective; it’s fucking witchcraft how Robin has you judging everyone around Kennit for falling for his charms even while you are in some way charmed by him. He’s intelligent, charismatic, enigmatic. You know he’s not a good person yet you enjoy spending time with him, you’re kind of rooting for him just because he’s interesting and you want to see what he’s going to do next. You even know - the narration straight up tells you - that most of his successes are down to pure dumb luck yet we still kind of buy into this persona of his. Absolutely brilliant writing. Not to mention his backstory, which is so tragic and compelling, and manages to explain his actions without excusing them. Without a doubt one of my top five favourite villains of all time.

Top Three Least Favourite Characters: Okay so again going for the writing angle; characters I just felt weren’t handled all that well on a technical level. Keep in mind that this is suuuuuper subjective. Also I can only think of two.

1. Molly - I’ve seen a lot of people assume that people who dislike her feel that way because she “gets in the way” of Fitz/Fool but that’s not true for me. I’ll try and keep this shortish because I have way too many feelings about this topic lol. Having read the whole series I wouldn’t change anything, but for a long time I really felt like the story would have been better if she wasn’t in it, or especially if she had not come back after Assassin’s Quest. Maybe that’s harsh, but I honestly just generally dislike the whole “first love, last love” trope (and in my personal experience have found it v toxic). I never found her character particularly engaging, but by the end of Farseer I had made my peace with her role in Fitz’s story; the way I saw it, she represented the life Fitz wanted but could never have. Of course you could argue then that it makes sense for Fitz to get her back once he is allowed to have a window of normal life - and that would be true EXCEPT the whole reason I saw her as a symbol and not a real love interest was because their relationship was TERRIBLE. It was seriously toxic and literally based on lies. I really felt what would have been healthy for Fitz at the end of Tawny Man would have been to find peace in realising that Molly was his past, not his future, and that what they’d had was teenage lust and not the stuff of soulmates. I don’t like the implication that Fitz was right to idealise this tumultuous, dishonest, immature relationship he had as a teenager all these years. Honestly this is why I was FURIOUS when I finished Fool’s Fate lol, even though I knew this wasn’t the ultimate ending. Now that I know where Robin went with this and that Fitz wasn’t really fulfilled in his life with Molly I don’t mind it as much but I still don’t love it. There was never enough of an honest, genuine, selfless connection established between the two of them for it to feel like anything other than an unhealthy fixation that Fitz projected all his unattainable fantasies onto. He never seemed to see Molly as a fully realised person which made it hard for me to do so. Also seriously, if I had been pining after my high school fling for the last ten years everyone would agree that the best thing for me would be to move on, not get back together with them. I’m not saying Fitz didn’t deserve his little bracket of peaceful years, but it just didn’t have to be with Molly. Sometimes not getting what you thought you wanted is the happy ending - I guess it’s just really jarring in a series that’s generally so subversive to get a standard fantasy trope like this. I really truly was shocked when Fitz got his feelings back from the stone dragon and his realisation was not “Molly is kind of just a girl I used to know a long time ago and our paths have long since diverged” but “yes no actually that girl I haven’t talked to in over a decade is my soulmate” like, wig in the worst way. ALSO SHE WAS FUCKING HIS DAD ALL THAT TIME. SHE BORE HIS DAD CHILDREN. HIS DAD HAD TO DIE SO THEY COULD BE TOGETHER. BRUH. Seriously it did feel like Burrich was sacrificed solely so these two little shits could get back together, and again, that was so infuriating and so not like these books. This and Burrich not being canonically in love w Chivalry are the only two points I actually get riled up about from a writing/critical perspective lol, every other flaw and quirk in this series I will absolutely pardon but for some reason these just get to me dude.

2. Starling - Promise this one is simpler lol. I always found Starling quite irritating “as a person” but didn’t mind her as a character. What I didn’t love was the way her lifestyle (promiscuity, independence, nomadic etc.) was kind of justified when it didn’t need to be, with the typical explanation that she’s only like this because she can’t have kids. It just felt really unnecessary, and it was even worse when she did get pregnant and basically just became a completely different person. But I’m generally touchy when it comes to female characters and fertility/pregnancy storylines as I just feel like they’re rarely done well. And I just really don’t like it when infertility is implied as a justification for character traits (usually traditionally male traits) that don’t need justifying.

Favourite Ship (of the floating kind): Paragon of course, we love a problematic fave.

Top Three Favourite Ships (of the people kind): Fitz/Fool, Sedric/Carson, Althea/Brashen (the only heteros whomst deserve rights)

Would you rather be Witted or Skilled: Honestly wouldn’t want either but if I had to choose I guess the Wit? I’d much rather be inside an animal’s head than another human’s no thanks bb

If you were Witted, what animal would you bond with?: If I’m still living in my current situation in this hypothetical then I guess a house cat. If I really get to go wild then I am absolutely bonding with a big cat, like a tiger or a panther IMAGINE THE SNUGGLES.

Would you rather live in the Outislands, the Mountain Kingdom, the Six Duchies, Bingtown, the Rain Wilds, Kelsingra, Jamaillia, the Pirate Isles, or Fool’s Homeland?: Dude I am so bad at visualising locations so idk lol, I guess queer utopia Kelsingra although obviously it has its drawbacks.

How were you introduced to the books? My mum had been telling me for years that if I liked A Song of Ice and Fire I would like Realm of the Elderlings. I was putting it off because there are so many books and I also knew how much she loved them so I was worried I wouldn’t like them and she’d be let down. But I eventually got so close to rereading ASOIAF (which I swore I wouldn’t do til Winds of Winter is released) that I decided to finally give RotE a go in its stead.

Share a quote you love: I don’t have a book on me rn but that part in Fool’s Errand when Fitz is talking about how the Fool has wandered into the place he’s been living for years and immediately, effortlessly made it a home is TENDERNESS BEYOND COMPARE ARE YOU KIDDING.

Tagging: if you see this and haven’t done it yet, consider yourself tagged!

Take the thing, copy and paste it into your own post, tag it “elderlings” and then tag as many people as you can that you know in the fandom.

[ayakashiramblings]

Thank you to my followers! :D

This is long overdue but well, here it is. Because this is a secondary blog, I can’t reply to some of you without reblogging and we all know how ugly that is. I could technically DM but I’m a bit shy about randomly popping in to talk about a post that is like 5 days old or something, LOL.

And yet I’m doing this. Wow, the sheer logic.

So here I am, consolidating all the replies that I really wanted to respond to because YOU!ARE!SO!NICE!  And I thought it would be nice to talk about some of the works and my thoughts on them, especially if they are going to be edited in the future!

Oh but if this is offensive in any way, please do tell. I don’t want to invade someone’s privacy or something. 

I’m also showing the results of the Google Form although there are only 6 responses so technically, it’s not accurate?

Sorted by users:

D’aww thanks @newthoran97-blog! Your ask and the Nonnie’s made me squeal a bit inside, especially since technically some of the Dawn Faction members didn’t get one in their routes.

Plus, I have been dying to talk about kissing Koga there, hehe! (BTW, for some reason I can’t tag you so I’m putting you first in hopes that you will see this!)

Back at you @mseliteminority ! While Koga is my favourite, Aoi’s MC has made me blush, thinking about kissing hands (other than my cat’s paws, LOL).

Hun, listen, ANYONE would love to do your requests! The silent treatment is a CLASSIC war tactic that my cat always dabbles in when she doesn’t get to play with her cat teaser. 

And honestly, I’m so happy to make you laugh! Hope you and your roommate are happy! 

@singingonmyojileyka You don’t get a picture because YOU ARE A MASTERPIECE! 

No, but seriously, thank you for reblogging! It always brightens my day to see a reblog and share more with the fandom! You’re amazing! Here are some of my favourites although there is too many for me to consolidate without melting into a puddle:

The very first one. Makes me shed a tear every time I see it. 

YOU ARE CUTE! Although honestly, I was glad to see this on the Summer Festival post because I am not so familiar with the world of Japan. The few anime I watch are usually short ones so very few feature a Summer! Episode. Glad to see you liked it! :D

This... this... you see the pattern here? How they MURDER ME WITH KINDNESS?! Sobs...

Like I said, check them out! I think they also made an Ayakashi Romance Reborn TV Trope Page which btw helped me with this fic;

Kitsune no Yomeiri (NSFW)

@claggle Yes, I look through your reblogs too like the maniac I am BECAUSE IT IS SO PURE!

@chaerryamamiya You made me write my first FanFic, something I was incredibly scared to do because honestly, my English sucks, LOL. So thank you for the request even though I honestly wasn’t familiar with the work! 

@ambereyedsnek YOUR ART AND WORDS MAKE MY DAY! 

Also, you’re very kind in inviting me to interact with the rest of the fandom, I was honestly worried about how to talk to others.

Ah, WTF. As in... the series, not the explicit. I can’t seem to recreate it if you look at Episode 2... BUT I AM GOING TO DO MORE BECAUSE GAKU HAS BEEN HAUNTING ME AND IT IS NOT FUNNY!

And yes, that joke in the Summer Festival Headcanon still makes me wonder how the heck did I come up with that one other than seeing the Flat Earther meme. 

@saeryenkalador OMG, you’ve been cute since day 1! Thank you for your request! I love cats! Meow!

Ok, but trying to incorporate Pokemon elements into Let’s Go Kuya! was a bit hard because I technically grew in the era of Pokemon... but somehow avoided being sucked into the world until the Detective Pikachu movie. Yes true diehard fans, I suck, I know.

That said, this was probably one of the most fun ones, LMAO. Arigato!

@pendingreply and @duerme07 : Actually you are the same person, right? Either way, thank you so much for the request! It was so much fun to do! I’m glad you liked it!

AND YOU are a great service! Thank you so much!

The best days of the week btw. Sigh, if only Oji-san knew.

@katiefromdablock 

You have made me wonder beyond the universe and its mysteries. No, but really, it’s so nice to see you and your asks! Thank you so much!

AND ALSO YOUR ART! SQUEE THE FIRST TIME I GOT FANART. 

I would show them but this would make the post NSFW SO PEOPLE DO CHECK THEM OUT!

@dany-ryujin Thank YOU so much for the request! Honestly, I was kind of inspired after watching some documentaries for this particular request so it somehow wounded in Kuya’s ABC NSFW headcanon, LMAO. I hope we can share tea someday and spit it out as we discover more of Kuya’s secrets.

@ikementally-deficient And I need YOU to know your comment on Oji made my day! Love your matchups btw! Go and check them out!

There are more of you but this post would get too long because y’all are too great. Thank you so much to all the Nonnies! I want your shades someday to tackle you into a bear hug!

And thank you to the rest of the followers! I hope to improve! 

Which is why I did a Google Form. It only has 6 requests so if you have any thoughts, you can go there and fill it out, completely anonymously.

https://forms.gle/xMqKAZLtdZNnkpPC8

So I need to make them longer based on the responses.

Yay!

Double Yay!

Triple Yay except to the last one, I can’t teach. I don’t even know what I am doing, LOL. I can tell you if I find it funny or sad though I guess? IDK, what do teachers do? 

You know, now that I think about it, the questions are worded weirdly but I’m hoping the results won’t change for this one with this post, LOL.

Thank god because I have a confession to make.

I really, really, really... hate Yakumo. He reminds me of a bad incident that I would rather stay away from. I know, it’s not fair especially since I haven’t played his MS so I am hoping to keep an open mind. 

OMG I didn’t know someone even liked the Best Man headcanon. That one was purely random. Better look at it again.

I actually hate one headcanon of mine... and it’s the Starbucks one. Makes me cringe. Also, the ones when I neglected Yura and Aoi. The most recent one I hate is the Inari sushi because it sounds more like a thread than a headcanon.

This one... I can’t remember why I put this question actually... but thanks for responding! Makes me more confident to reblog with no fear.

Will keep the tags.

The last comment has been noted. I actually have some in mind but most of the requests are better suited for a headcanon style so I might close the ask box to focus on them. Hope you guys don’t mind! If you do, you know what to do!

Sniff, the blue one made me cry actually. Thank you so much!

And once again, thank you for following me! I’m so happy to be part of this loving and funny fandom and hope to get know more of you! :D

[woodsofblight]

Do you have any headcanons on either Ly or the People of Prhys you could share?

Oh boy do I ever!

I’m sure by now most people in the fandom know or has experienced it, but it can get exceedingly difficult to put together a reliable timeline, considering the conflicting events (god help you if you’re including Origins/Legends). Needless to say there’s a bunch of things in the Rayman universe I assume to be gross exaggerations, mainly for the purpose of not losing my mind. With that said, Ly and the People of Phrys.

First of all, I should note that a lot of the promo material, especially the artwork for Rayman 2, seem to suggest that the friendship between Rayman and Ly has been around far longer than just the events of 2/Revolution. Based on information from the old R2 website, it can also be reasonably assumed that the events of 2 weren’t the first time Rayman has come across the pirates (Razorbeard is another issue entirely if you wish to take the Animated Series into consideration). More on this later.

I believe Ly and Rayman are close to the same age, though exactly which of them is older is a frequent topic of debate, made all the more difficult by Rayman coming into existence as at the very least an older child (depending on how old you think he is in 1). 

Considering the People of Phrys are only every mentioned in an off-hand note, I personally think they were a fairly reserved society with not as much contact with the mainland of Polokus. Whether this is because they served a different god or were merely very prone to isolating themselves is anyone’s guess, though the note implying secrets would suggest the latter.

Taking their high status into account, the nymphs were probably one of the few people who could reliably set foot upon their lands (accompanied by the requisite amount of Teensies for transportation). As secretive as they may have been though, they probably did recognize the importance of gaining knowledge (or were merely convinced by the nymphs) and either through their recommendation, or Betilla’s decision, Ly is chosen as an envoy and, essentially, transfer student at a very young age. Young enough to still be receptive to the outside world and able to learn many things she could eventually bring home and help enrich their culture. 

Based on her promo material and general behavior she was likely an attentive and respectful child when learning, but wild and prone to exploring the forest for days on end, whenever she could.

Betilla has been shown to unlock Rayman’s abilities in 1, but Silver Lums are still something we’ve only ever seen specifically from Ly. This is more than likely an extremely rare talent, especially when you consider how instrumental Lums of all kind are to the fabric of the world. It is talent the nymphs would recognize as extremely important to cultivate. However, unlike with her teachers (especially Betilla, her primary mentor, Holly, who believes to this day that she has a beautiful singing voice, if only she could be more confident about it, and Anetta, who adores her despite Ly’s aversion to large bodies of water), she never quite got along with other fairies (apart from Tily). 

Whether this is because she’s so different, or if it’s envy because the nymphs favored her, is anyone’s guess. Still, no wonder she chose the depths of the Glade as her home, instead of the Council. Likewise no wonder that her other favored spots are a stele and a cave! 

Either way, she ended up finding kinship with other “odd” fellows of the Glade instead, such as Clark, Globox, and of course, Rayman. Another group she ends up befriending are the Teensies, whom she follows around with curiosity, as due to the isolated nature of her homeland, they were seldom found there. The Teensies find her curiosity adorable and they end up taking a liking to her. This grows into immense respect as she protects them during the Pirate invasion. So much so, that they have created several monuments in her honor, and out of pure affection, often in places fairies usually wouldn’t access on their own, so as not to fuel any existing animosity.

Going forwards in time, I believe she returned to Phrys at a certain time. The first skirmish of the Pirates is beaten, but either the main force, or a second attack comes rolling in and things quickly go out of hand. Ly breaks the isolation and calls upon her friends for assistance and while they are relatively successful, the sudden attack and damage to the land is too much for its inhabitants to bear. The People of Phrys panic, and turn to desperate measures, unearthing the secrets they held, the very ones Ly tried to help them protect (with spotty knowledge on what they even were). The results were… exceedingly bad.

It’s hard to place when or how this art piece occurs (if it does at all, since there’s some things that just didn’t end up in the main game), but after initially believing it just show the Pirate’s devastation, I now think it shows something different. I believe this piece takes place immediately in the aftermath. The People of Phrys are gone. Ly is devastated. Clark is waving goodbye to a land he once helped shape and Polokus is likewise distraught, whether they were his children or not (I don’t think Rayman realized who he was at this point in time, and he may only be there as a temporary manifestation, hence his introduction later in 2).

In any case, the people Ly wanted to protect are now gone. This is incredibly hard for her to swallow and while she does try to hide it, the (perceived) failure weighs heavily on her, for years on end. It drives her deeper into her studies, resulting in even further isolation from the Council and her other fairy kin, from which her friends work tirelessly to pull her out of. While she has no concrete proof, she desperately wants to believe that whatever happened to her people is just some kind of massive displacement, rather than eradication. After all, much of this world is centered on dreams, who can say they might not be out there somewhere? 

I believe this ends up being something that drives her to obsessively learn and sometimes even vanish for certain amounts of time, which is why she seldom appears following Rayman 2/Revolution. Whether this is good for her in the long run is anyone’s guess. Such frustration, combined with the magic she possesses, could prove volatile in some cases.

As for other things, I also think she would get along relatively well with Barbara, though the latter would likely consider Ly to be far too stuck-up and serious for her temperament. It would drive her tease Ly on occasion, to which she sometimes would respond in kind, though she would defer to her in most cases that cannot be solved by just planting the business end of an axe in them. 

I believe Ly might actually be a bit jealous even, considering how far Barbara has been able to go adventuring with Rayman and co.; something she would like to do as well, but unfortunately she just cannot cope with the extreme changes in temperature, such as in Gourmand Land or the Blue Mountains. Nevertheless, she would never outwardly show that.

~ ~ ~

I think that about covers it! I’m very fond of Ly as a character and really hope she’ll make another appearance in a future Rayman game. I wouldn’t necessarily count on finding out more about the People of Phrys, but Michel Ancel and his team are unpredictable enough that anything could happen. 

I may have forgotten about a couple of minor, flavor things, but those will probably end up appearing in some shape or form in my writing.

Thank you for tuning in to my essay on this lovable cat-fairy! All images are courtesy of the RaymanPC Wiki.

[slurpingsoba]

My Object of Affection

Okay, listen up. This was my failed attempt at writing shigadabi fluff, but I feel like it’s a waste to just delete it, so I’m posting it here. There’s virtually no plot but there’s a little bit of action at the end. Oh, and I didn’t feel like writing out a fight scene so it kind of just ends abruptly. Have fun reading?

-

I loved little moments like this. Just laying next to Shigaraki, playing with tufts of his cotton candy-colored hair, swirling pieces of it in between my fingers. It was obvious that he enjoyed it by the way he curled into me on the bed, nuzzling his cheek into the crook of my neck. He mumbled something to himself, content with our closeness, and I couldn’t help but smile.

Moments like these were rare because villains like us were always on the run, but that’s what made them more meaningful. Love could turn a cold, hardened person like me into a sentimentalist, savoring intimacy like how an artist savored the feeling of a paintbrush in their hands. This relationship I had with Shigaraki, so deep and unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before, was my biggest accomplishment, my greatest masterpiece.

I had no idea how I ended up falling for the man laying on top of me right now, but I think it had something to do with his eyes. Those ruby red eyes of his were dangerous. They were so brilliant and saturated that I found myself falling into them, enraptured by their perpetuity. From there, I found myself captivated by the rest of him. His scarred yet soft lips, rough and textured skin that felt supple under my fingertips, sharp collarbone and jaw that I found myself kissing more often than not, littering those coveted areas with bruises. Even his calloused hands were beautiful to me. I knew he would never hurt me with them; I trusted him wholeheartedly. Because he was my object of affection. My light in the darkness.

I yawned and wrapped my arm tighter around Shigaraki. A dim glow from the nearest window illuminated the room; from the looks of it, it was early morning. I had business to attend to in the afternoon, and I’m sure Shigaraki did too, but for now, I wanted to spend some quality time with my boyfriend.

I shook Shigaraki lightly, as to not startled him and make him disintegrate me accidentally. With no success, I wasted no time in gently pinching his cheek. His eyes shot open.

“Dabi…” he whined. He was extra cute when he was sleepy.

“Morning babe.” I kissed his cheek.

“...5 more minuuuutes.” Shigaraki grumbled, squirming on top of me as to make himself more comfortable, “I need my beauty sleep.”

“You’re beautiful enough.”

“You always say that even though it’s not true.” A pout appeared on his lips. I chuckled at his sudden bout of childishness.

“Fuck yeah it’s true. Have you ever looked in the mirror?”

“I tend to avoid them, actually,” Shigaraki said, trailing off at the end of his sentence.

His self-esteem was a mess, but I tried to boost his confidence by showering him with compliments often. Although his role as leader of the league had improved his confidence levels a bit, he still doubted himself from time to time. It made my heart ache, how he sometimes failed to recognize how incredible he was.

I sat up on the bed, leaning against the bed frame. Shigaraki moved off of me, his movements resembling a cat’s as he positioned himself in front of me on the bed. I stared at him, taking in his features and storing them into my memory. I never wanted to forget about the wrinkles under his eyes, the curve of his nose, or the little birthmark under his chin. I sighed to myself, completely and unabashedly infatuated with Shigaraki.

“Dabi, you awake?” He waved a hand in front of my face. “Earth to Dabi…”

“Huh?”

“You checked out on me, silly.”

“I was just admiring you.”

“Again? Damn, you must really like me.” He placed a chaste kiss to my lips.

“I do if you couldn’t already tell.”

—

Shigaraki’s phone started ringing from the nearby nightstand. He picked it up with two fingers, his knuckles brushing the surface of his beloved hand, father, as he looked at the screen to see who was calling. It was Mr. Compress.

“Hello?” Shigaraki said, taking the call, “isn’t it a bit early for you to be calling, Compress?”

I began to massage Shigaraki’s shoulders when he turned away from me. He made a motion with his hands for me to stop as if I was distracting him. I wrapped my arms loosely around his neck instead.

Shigaraki tensed up.

“They’ve found out our central base’s location? But that’s where I am right now.”

My eyes widened. Most of the league members had rooms in the central base, including Shigaraki. If what Mr. Compress was saying was true, it was only a matter of time before…

Bullets rained through the window, barely missing the both of us. I instinctively put myself between Shigaraki and the window, ready to use myself as a shield in case any more bullets flew in. I wouldn’t let Shigaraki get hurt, no matter what.

“Dabi, we have to get out of here!”

Shigaraki got off the bed and ran towards his nearest pair of shoes, putting them on rapidly. I did the same, grabbing Shigaraki’s trench coat from his coat rack and handing it to him. I put on mine and took inventory of the contents in my pockets. I had a gum wrapper, loose change, and a pack of cigarettes. None of those items would help us in our current predicament, sadly.

I walked towards the door and opened it, pushing Shigaraki through. He seemed a bit hesitant to leave, however. It was as if he were forgetting something.

“Father!” He exclaimed, sprinting towards the hand on the nightstand. Another round of bullets tore through the room before Shigaraki even reached the table. I rushed towards him, grabbing him and pulling him out of the room. I noticed a red welt on Shigaraki’s face. A bullet must’ve grazed him.

“Shit, you’re bleeding.”

“It’s fine,” He said, wiping his bloodstained cheek with his hand, “it’s not like I haven’t been shot before.”

“Come on,” I said, holding onto Shigaraki’s forearm. “We gotta go somewhere safe.”

The sound of gunshots grew louder as we moved further down the halls of the base. We ran together, my grip on Shigaraki growing stronger as we dodged more attacks.

Then, Shigaraki pulled me into a corner. I was confused, to say the least.

“Listen to me, there’s only one nearby exit, and it’s probably where the shooters are entering from.” Shigaraki was panting slightly, and his cheek was still bleeding. I took his face into my hands and cradled it, rubbing my thumb over his cut.

“I know, and I understand what you’re saying.”

“This could be it.”

“Don’t say that.”

“You know I’m just trying to be realistic.” Shigaraki sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. He was anxious. So was I.

“God, I can’t believe I had to leave father behind,” Shigaraki continued. “But I’d rather have you than him.”

He took a couple steps towards me, forcing my back against the nearest wall. My breath hitched, finding myself falling into the intensity of his eyes again when he looked at me.

“I love you,” Shigaraki said, inching closer to me and closing the gap between us. The kiss felt so pure and unbridled that I almost forgot that this kiss could be our last. That thought alone, a life without Shigaraki, was too much to bear. It brought a single tear to my eye.

“I love you too, and don’t you forget that.”

“I know you do.” He replied, grinning up at me. His smile never ceased to fill me with delight.

As the world came crashing down around us, I knew that even death couldn’t tear us apart. Because my love for Shigaraki was potent and untouchable. And we were intangible, lovers too wrapped up in ourselves to face the end. But if I were to die today, being able to die by Shigaraki’s side would be a bittersweet joy, not a tragedy.

[lettersandinkstains]

Writing Advice II: Depression

So, my other post on writing trauma seems to have taken off and been fairly well received!

Another misconception I see among media is things on depression. They believe it’s always a young white girl who cries a lot, wears all black and maybe hurts herself. Bonus points if she’s an artist. Extra bonus points if there’s some sort of resistance to therapy, medication, and, “You won’t be as creative on anti depressants!”

Disclaimer: Mental illness comes in all sorts of ways, so how it may appear in me might be different for someone else. These are based on experience as well as the diagnosable symptoms that are common.

Warning: There is some discussions of s.uicide, so please be cautious when going forward.

Clinical depression, major depression. We’ve all heard those words, and we quite likely know someone who has a diagnosis or we, ourselves, have it. But what does it mean exactly? Everyone assumes it’s just feeling sad, and you don’t always feel sad, heck, maybe you feel good a lot of days!

That’s because depression is a persistent feeling of sadness. It usually leads to physical and behavioral changes.

Well, what are the symptoms?

According to the DSM:

The Mood Symptoms:

Anxiety, apathy, general discontent, guilt, a sense of hopelessness, a sense of helplessness, loss of interest in things you may have found pleasurable in the past, mood swings and sadness.

The Behavioral Symptoms

Agitation, excessive crying, irritibility, restlessness or social isolation.

Sleep-wise:

Insomnia, excessive sleeping, early wakening, or restless sleep.

Whole body:

Excessive hunger, fatigue, or loss of appetite

Cognitive:

Lack of concentration, slowness in activity, or thoughts of suicide.

(Please note: this is just a simplified list--there’s quite a few more things to go with it)

How these things will appear in people vary. For me, I would cry excessively and for absolutely no reason. I opened my fridge one day to make chocolate milk, because for once, something sounded good and found it had spoiled two weeks prior. I sobbed for an hour. For me, that spoiled milk had felt like I was an absolute failure of a human being and adult.

I mean, I let the milk spoil. I felt utterly worthless. This may perhaps be dramatic to the outsider, after all, it is just milk, but often times, it’s not just milk or a dropped pen or even a bad day, it’s a series of things that mold up into a mountain and that little insignificant thing causes the avalanche. Perhaps, yes, it was an overreaction, but for me, it felt as it was a testament as to who I was as a person then.

When the sickness (because I consider it a sickness) first showed up, I was probably around nine or ten. The symptoms were subtle and could have easily been brushed off as being shy. I started to isolate myself from my peers, I preferred to be on the computer and away from everybody. I had thoughts of suicide, even if I didn’t quite have that word in my lexicon yet.

For me, at that age, death meant the end of suffering. I was raised in a religious household, and the church I attended was pure doom and gloom. If you died, you would be with god and nothing would be wrong. Religion wasn’t a factor, but it sure as hell was an enticer to try.

Do I think religion such as Christianity to be bad, now, as an adult? No, I do have my hang ups with it, but I’ve known religion to help a lot of people overcome or even deal with their mental health issues. And to them, I give them props.

The emotional pain I feel and had felt was something I could not, and still cannot describe to this day. The closest I have gotten to describing it was to a therapist, and it feels like there’s a giant ball of scribbles in my chest that’s constantly turning and growing bigger. It always feels like it hurts and it’s suffocating. I picked up cutting because if I could just get it out, it would go away.

It never really went away.

I stopped being able to sleep around age thirteen. For others, they sleep too much. For some, it’s disruptive, and it’s restless. But for me, it manifested itself as insomnia (anxiety played a major part in this too). The nights were long and restless, and I would often cry. Because wow, sleep is another thing I’m failing at! My weight dropped due a lack of appetite, food tasted like cardboard, and the smell made me want to vomit (I would later be diagnosed with EDNOS).

My grades suffered. Focusing was hard. Words felt like gibberish most days. Hobbies felt bland, awful, and stupid (it didn’t help I had brothers who made fun of my interests). The sociable little girl I had been, the one my parents sang praises for being smart, friendly, and witty all felt like it died when I became a teenager. Part of it had to do with my period at age nine. I would later learn this is likely a part of dysphoria.

Writing felt like my only outlet, as depression ate and took away a personality. I’m still discovering my interests today, at aged 27! And you know what? That’s okay! It’s okay to have overcome a shadow and relearn things, this isn’t a race.

So, how do you write things like this in a character? You may wonder. Surely, nobody with depression is always crying and locked away from society.

No, of course not! Give them a personality. Much like with anything else, depression isn’t a personality, it’s an illness. 

Let your characters still experience happiness. I still felt some joy and excitement at things. When I did theater in high school, I felt a rush of pride when I was able to memorize silolquies and impressed my classmates, my heart still beat fast when my then girlfriend would kiss me. Calling my friends (because texting wasn’t much of a thing in 9th and 10th grade! I don’t think it became ubquitous until I was about to graduate?) was still exciting, and I would always look forward to weekend long sleepovers.

As an adult, the things that still made me excited and got me out of bed was volunteer work. I would later foster cats and then lose that after a second suicide attempt. But there were still things that made me happy.

Because with depression, you can still experience happiness. The sadness is persistent. 

Give your characters interests, but let them have their struggles with it. I still message friends with my frustrations and anger when nothing seems right and everything I do is bad. Let this be a thing with your characters where they’ll go days without experiencing the adrenaline rush from their interest. 

Your hero in your fantasy adventure story doesn’t always have to be strong and courageous. Let them struggle with the trauma of having watched So and So die or get hurt. Let them feel the guilt. Have days where they can’t get out of bed because it’s just too much, it’s too hard. Their chest aches, their heart aches.

But force them anyways. And as usual, make sure it fits with your story. Don’t fret because you’re writing something and the character isn’t responding to a terrifying, traumatic event like you believe they should. People process things differently. If it fits in the story, do it, but do it well.

Your main character in your romance story has major depression. Okay, cool! When you bring in the love interest, and the romance blossoms and there’s roses, maybe they confess their love to each other. Maybe there’s that little bit of drama, a misunderstanding, or whatever your conflict is. Don’t go Hollywood. Do not let the love interest be the thing that “fixes” the depression.

Because that’s not how it works. Your character may decide to live, or get better for that love interest--PERFECT! GOOD! People do that all the time! I’m doing that for my cat! Let the love interest help them, but do not say that the character was now healed by love and they lived happily ever after. That doesn’t feel real, and feels very, very misleading. I’ve destroyed relationships because I was severely depressed. 

“But what if I want to write something like that? Real life isn’t always fun.” No, it’s not. It’s okay if you want to write something like that, but we already have countless movies geared towards things like that. I can guarantee the next Lifetime movie has that sort of plot. And while you’re free to write as you please, it gives people an incredibly wrong idea. You cannot heal someone by the “power of love”, they have to want to get better, and it’s an uphill battle.

I can’t tell you the countless times I’ve heard people in support groups express frustrations with themselves or their partners because they’re not better yet. “They said they love me, but they’re mad I’m still depressed.” or, “I have this person in my life now, I’m in a relationship. Why aren’t I happy?” 

So as you write this story, keep in mind, you are adding a real life element to it that people struggle with on a daily basis. And we all rely on escape fantasies, but there are still those who think those can be true. And it’s dangerous. A former friend of mine believed that if she loved this guy enough, if she stuck around, he would get better. She just not trying hard enough. He never got better. And she suffered all the more for it.

Alternatively, I watched one of my friends flourish in a relationship. She passed away this summer because she still had her demons, and those demons got the best of her. But you know what happened instead of ~love~ healing her? She worked to get better, she relied on her partner when she needed to. She used the support net she had, and strived towards healing. And she did amazing because she felt she had something to live for. 

So, if you want to add in that real life element where people struggle with, and has claimed lives, write it so that love interest is someone they decide to live for. And I think that’s a more interesting romance story instead of, “Mentally ill character falls in love, suddenly cured” trope!

The people I know who struggle with depression either do seek professional help (therapy, psychotherapy, medication) or self medicate (drugs, alcohol, etc).

Family members are alcoholics, for example. One uncle would prefer to see the bottom of a bottle starting at 7 am and going until 12 am. He only got better from alcoholism for four years, until his kids graduated. Being drunk is preferable state of mind for him than whatever reality he may be having to face (and yes, some of us are trying to help him--he doesn’t need an early grave at 65).

A friend of mine used drugs to escape the world and the demons that followed. Last year, he got clean for good. This year, he started anti depressants. This month, he is soaring.

I know someone else who uses religion. They are happy in this state, and I cannot find fault in that. If someone finds peace, contentedness, happiness when believing in a higher power, let them be. Unless it is so obviously hurting them or others.

Lastly, a small note on medication is that it’s not one size fits all. Medications can be a bitch to deal with, I had to mess around for a long time before I found something that works, which is ativan. If you want your character to go on meds, keep in mind that taking that first pill doesn’t automatically mean they’re suddenly happy and cured for life.

For some, medication means it’s a lifetime thing, and others, a short while. However you decide to do this, is up to you.

Make sure to research it. Make sure to do it well. And if you have struggles and asking if you’re doing it right, reach out to someone about it and ask questions. It’s okay. Nobody should fault you for that.

And as I’ve said before, we can have our happy ending. But it’s your choice on the characters ending because there is no “wrong” way to do it, because some people lose their battle. Some people live to survive it and tell about it, others will battle tooth and nail for the rest of their lives.

So, with this very long post ending, readers, writers, everyone, if you struggle with depression or know someone who has and wish to add on to this post (about your experiences!), feel free to do so! After all, it rears its ugly head differently in everyone, and well rounded information is often given by a multiude of people!

And if anyone has questions, you are free to send me an ask or a message!

[simplerstudying]

4 things I learned when applying for college

So for reference, I only applied to two (2) schools because I did early decision and early application and was lucky enough to get in to my top choice which was NYU. I also got into UMassAmherst which was the other school I applied to. I sort of fumbled my way through the whole USA college application process completely on my own because I go to school in England and my school knows fuck all about American applications. I also just applied this year (2018) so my experience is recent af - I’ll be starting my freshman year of college Fall 2019.

This is just a lil preface/disclaimer so you guys know that this is only from my personal experience and this is not an extensive list of things that can be helpful. 

There are so many lists like this in the studyblr community so please! Look at a variety of them because everyone’s experience is different but still equally valid. I found these lists so helpful when I was applying and I thought that now I’ve done it myself, I should give some of my own tips from what I have learnt.

1. do not leave things to the last minute

I literally cannot stress this enough oh. my. god.

I was a procrastinating idiot and left everything to the very last minute (and I really do mean the last minute - I only just finished my UMassAmherst application in time). The essays especially can be really daunting and I think I just panicked a little bit with them so I kept on putting them off for as long as I possibly could. I promise you, once you start the essays they aren’t that bad. And if you’re smart and don’t leave them until the last moment, not only do you relieve some of the pressure of the application process, you also give yourself time to improve it and to show the colleges the very best version of you.

2. if you can, visit colleges

Obviously this might not be a doable thing for many people, but if you have the opportunity to visit colleges, take it. I was really lucky that my family was able to fly to America and do a college tour as a sort of family holiday, but I 100% recognise that not everyone is able to do that.

When I went, I visited eight (8) in total: Harvard, Yale, Columbia, NYU, UChicago, William & Mary, and UVA. The reason why I valued this trip so much in particular is because of Columbia and NYU.

Before going on this trip I thought I’d love Columbia and hate NYU. For me, the idea of a closed campus was a very big thing that I wanted as part of my college experience and in general, I knew more about Columbia than I did about NYU.

What ended up happening (which you may have already guessed since I’m going to NYU) is that I hated Columbia and loved NYU - a complete switch from what I thought before. I went to Columbia and it immediately just didn’t feel like the right place for me. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an incredible uni and a cool campus, but I just personally didn’t vibe with it at all. We were supposed to get a tour but ended up leaving before it started because I just knew that I would never want to spend a whole bunch of money and four (4) years of my life there. The next day we went to NYU which I was iffy about from the get go because it’s an open campus and a much bigger school so I just didn’t really think much of it. We weren’t able to get a tour because they had been all booked up the week we went but we got a map and a student drew out a route for us to take. I fell in love with this school so damn quick you have no idea haha. The entire feel of it just clicked with me and even though its an open campus, it still felt like you were on a campus and surrounded by students whilst also being a few steps away from the centre of Greenwich Village.

TL;DR - NYU went from barely being on my application list to being my top choice all because I visited it in person. If you can, visiting can change so much for you.

3. be honest in your application

Going into the application process I had a lot of anxiety over extracurriculars. Activities and extras are a very different thing in England. They aren’t as big of a deal when you’re applying to uni and in general, they aren’t pushed quite as much as they are in America. As a result, I was really worried that I wouldn’t have enough and that I wouldn’t get into uni because I don’t do a million and five after school clubs.

What I realised when I started the application is that a) you probably do a whole lot more than you realise, and b) there is no point in exaggerating or stretching the truth about what you do/don’t do.

On the CommonApp they give you 10 spaces for activities. I originally thought I’d only have 3 things - I ended up having 6. It isn’t just about what you do as clubs after school, it’s how you help out in general at your school, it’s what you do to expand on learning outside of school, and it can just be stuff you do for fun. I have squash lessons and let me tell you guys something - I suck at squash. I do it purely for fun but it was another thing I could put on my application because all that section is for really is to show the colleges what you do and how you expand yourself beyond your grades. You don’t have to be a star athlete or national level debate competitor - you just need to demonstrate that you do something other than lessons and trust me, everyone does something other than lessons whether they realise it or not.

Another thing that made me go shit i have done nothing with my life was the personal essay. I read so many example essays before writing my own and some of them probably did more harm than good. Not because they were bad, but because they were next level good. There were kids who helped teach refugee kids how to read, who had lived in 12 different countries and spoke a bajillion languages, who were champion chess players, and who had lived insane stories and lives that sounded like they belonged on an episode of Ellen. Now, if you are one of those people, a) congrats! you’ve lived a super dope life already and i’m jealous, and b) this does not apply to you. 

If, like me and many others, you are not one of those people, don’t panic and write a fake super human story. It isn’t worth it and it won’t get you very far. Even if you don’t realise it, there is something that is interesting about you that you can write 600 words about that will give a better insight into who you are for colleges to see. I straight up wrote about my anxiety disorder and how I like to relax by snacking and watching NCIS. That is not a joke. I am serious, I wrote about binge watching TV and somehow still got into NYU (trust me, I’m confused too).

My point is, find something that you’re passionate about, something that is unique to your experience of life that others might not have, something that makes you think. If it’s provoking thought from you, it will provoke thought in the admissions officer.

4. try not to get hung up on one (1) school

I think a lot of people are guilty of this and I am going to go ahead and put myself in that same box. My heart got set on NYU pretty quickly after I visited, trolled the NYU website and watched every youtube video I could get my hands on. I was so fortunate that I got in because despite many efforts, I was totally obsessed with the idea of NYU and wanting to get in. If I hadn’t gotten in, I honestly think I might have had a breakdown and that isn’t an exaggeration. Even when I found out I got in, I still felt sick to my stomach for the entire night because of how unbelievably worried I was that I wouldn’t get in.

My point here is that I wish I hadn’t gotten to that point because there are so many universities out there and so many incredible ones and I think that you end up where you’re supposed to go - truly. I didn’t even think of NYU as a serious thing at first and now I’m going there. Your validity - both academically and personally - is not based on a college acceptance or a high GPA or a great personal essay. By getting hung up on a single school, if they don’t accept you, I think it can really hurt your confidence and it isn’t worth risking your own mental health because of one institution.

That ended up being waaayyy longer than I anticipated haha. I really hope this was helpful and gave a little insight into the process. 

If anyone has any questions about anything - my college application, school in england, study tips, grades, my cats who i love to talk about - pls pls pls do ask me!

[seleniftie]

First I’d like to point out that I’m not excluding myself COMPLETELY from the behavior I’m gonna talk about, and that not everyone acts 100% like this, but it’s a something I’ve been noticing for a while and it worries me a bit.

It’s unsettling how many people are acting like their lives depend on what Taylor is doing, on who she notices, on who she meets... and it makes me super uncomfortable.

I know some people here are young, and that explains why some of them act like that (I’ve been there before) BUT you guys need to realize that being a Taylor Swift fan is a HOBBY. She’s a sweetheart, her heart is so kind and full of love for her fans but she’s first and foremost an artist whose goal is to create art and make money from it, and she’s also just a person with a private life we know almost nothing about. I’m tired of people putting her on a pedestal like she’s god and will fix your broken pieces when you meet her. It will make you happy, I got extremely lucky to meet her and it’s an incredible experience BUT it didn’t change my world upside down! I still live my life like before, I simply have one of the most beautiful memories to look back on.

I also think people should stop making such big deals about everything like their life is in danger. What’s going on with TN is badly handled and not organized and it’s a mess to be honest. They’re not always being respectful to fans and the consequences of their actions hurt a lot of people. However, here are things we should remember too: they are adults working in a management company, not just for Taylor. They are community managers but they also are Taylor’s managers and therefore have other things to do than just tweeting emojis and gifs and making lists of people they sent DMs to (which again, they make a lot of mistakes about). We can obviously point out things to them cause they manage the fan club we’re in, but flooding them with threatening messages on their official page came off as really agressive and made us look like people we are not.

And most importantly... I know you guys all have a life besides Taylor. You have parents, family, friends, in real life people you get to spend your free time with, cats or dogs to pet, books to read, classes to study for, vacation to take. So... I would just like to remind you guys about unhealthy it can get, being 24/7 on social media in the Taylor Swift bubble. Please don’t live through Taylor’s life and her every move. The behavior I’ve noticed is logical because the more time you spend talking about someone/something, the more you’re gonna think about it and the more you’re gonna be on social media and the circle goes on. But spending 24/7 talking about how Taylor is the sweetest angel baby dove who is 100% pure is wrong and it’s NOT true. I love her so much but there are so many things we don’t know about and I think sometimes we forget she’s a normal person, but also someone with a very huge career which implies lots of business decisions, negotiations, and a great amount of people working for her.

Take care of yourselves guys, don’t base your school/career choices solely on Taylor because your social media account won’t define your life, and in my opinion you shouldn’t prioritize this virtual life over your real life — it’s an escape, it’s a freaking awesome hobby, but I don’t think it’s all your life should revolve around. Taylor herself loves hanging out with her fans online and at shows but she also separates things and when she’s off, she’s off, you know?

I love you all so much and it’s so amazing to be in this community and I myself have sometimes caught myself falling into this kind of behavior and that’s why I’m now so aware of it, so please when you’re done reading this, take a few seconds to take a step back and think about it.