#god I wanted to redraw that scene for so long and here I am

[wrathyforest]

[applesandbannas747]

i wanna hear your thoughts on the fence challengers: long shot preview pages if you want to share!

oh mAN I have so many and they are all over the place!!

The first one is a little thing, but I bet Seiji had a crush on Marcus Washington when he was a kid--Nick's horror, Harvard's teasing, and Seiji's indignant blush imply as much.

And a fun fact, Jo posted a mini preview of baby Seiji to Patreon on February 14th...maybe I'm reading into it too much, but that's nothing new XD

Next couple of things are about the scene with the trophy case. It was really interesting and fun to see side-by-side redraws of Robert! It really illustrates the way the style has evolved, and also I gOTTA say it feels like Jo is more invested in Robert based on the level of detail she put in--like it's not just a style comparison, it's also just obvious a lot of attention was put into these shots when a) she could have just reused old shots (which she's done before, so I know it was an option), or kept it more simplified like she did when drawing the original shots.

I also think it's sweet that the redraws have Robert looking much more like Jesse than the originals.

And I am sure I will get flack for this, but I have incredible second-hand embarrassment from Nick leaving his newspaper clipping + note in the trophy case jfhdasl like bestieee noooo anyone can see that shit now oh my god please stooop

Onto some Nichoji thoughts! I love that Seiji's been confirmed as a before-bed reader! Him having a Kindle makes sense for the sheer efficiency of it too lmfao. Of course it's also adorable to see him in reading glasses <3 And then my favorite detail is Nick's stupid nightlight...notice where it is?

Rather than illuminating Nick's side of the room, it's peeking around the curtain and lighting up Seiji's reading, which is beyond adorable and sweet. I wonder whether Seiji stole it or Nick put it there knowing Seiji likes to read before bed, and I love both scenarios.

Also, it's fucking adorable that as soon as Nick mentions their date appointment, Seiji takes off his glasses and lowers his Kindle because it's got his full attention and investment.

And a quick pitstop to the locker rooms!

I like the visual metaphor here with Aiden and Bobby both very casual about changing and both literally having their shirts open; meanwhile, Seiji's straightening the cuffs on his button-down, which is already neatly tucked in and complete with his tie. It just highlights how Seiji's a lot more closed off than the others, and I think this was a neat trick to remind us of that.

In regards to plot, I'm still...really disappointed in the pacing. I know most people feel like it's a slowburn/it's taken a long time to develop, but if you waited to read Fence at all until it was complete and then read it all in one sitting, I think you'd see how unbalanced it is. Williams says that their first match will be in three weeks back right after tryouts:

which means everything between issue 12 and CHALLENGERS has happened in 3 weeks. Seiji and Nick's relationship is so sweet and cute, but it went from resentful rivalry to puppy love overnight with very little 'screen time' dedicated to the actual transition from resentment to friends (which I could write a whole essay on but this is not the post for that lmfao). Furthermore, the fact that it's the first match of State Championships rather than first match of the season is crazy to me. I'll admit, I didn't fence in high school--it wasn't even an option because we didn't have a team. And despite hours of research, the structure of high school team fencing is not entirely clear to me. However, I do know that typical high school sports go through the season, facing every other team in their division or whatever. Based on performance in those matches, they can qualify for state, and then their win ratio determines their seeding order for the state championships that happen in like 1-2 days. Seeding order is who you go up against in a bracket, so it's what this diagram is, basically:

(side note, but it appears there are 24 schools competing at state). Again, fencing could be different, but it kinda seems to me like we skipped over the season and went right to State Championships, which just cuts out so much development and build-up. It's like we're speed-running the entire story to get to the end faster. We cut out showing the development in the romance, and now we're cutting out the development of the plot. There's still plenty that we can do at state, of course, but imagine how much more it would mean to see Nick fencing in front of Robert if we'd built that up more. I just don't understand how we spent 12 issues on try outs, 4 on a practice match, 8 on camp, and none on the fencing season. It feels so abrupt and unbalanced. Tryouts and camp were my favorites arcs because they felt pretty well-paced as self-contained pieces of the story. I just feel like we needed waaaaay more relationship development between those two arcs to be satisfying, and I feel like there should be waaaaay more build up during the fencing season between camp and State Championships.

and now, the moment you've all been waiting for: my devastation over Eugene's role (???) in the story. I honestly question why he's in the story at all--at this point, it would have made more sense to have him flat-out not make the team. Except that keeping him this long lowkey backs up the theory I've had on his role since Striking Distance/RIVALS: Eugene is here to make everyone else look better/cooler/more impressive. The very first thing that struck me when reading the first look was this:

The dialogue here suggests that only one reserve actually gets to be on the team in the end, and the reserve is Nick. And, worse, everyone expected it to be Nick. Sure, it's sweet that Seiji thinks Nick's the better fencer, but all I can think about is how hard Eugene's worked for ten years trying to make the team as opposed to Nick's three months of fencing. Now, I love an underdog story. But it's interesting because Pacat stated in an interview (I'd have to go find where for the specific quote) that he always feels bad for the person who's been working to be #1 their whole lives only to be knocked out of the running by an upstart underdog--which I've always assumed would influence the path taken in Fence...and it seems like we may well let Seiji and Jesse remain above Nick in skill (or at least it seems like we won't be dethroning Seiji, even if we go for Jesse), but Nick's overcoming smaller obstacles. And those smaller obstacles hurt worse to see crushed because Eugene almost made the team in a way that mattered, only to have that taken away. It would have been less cruel to him and his fans to let Nick take the reserve slot back in issue 12, but instead we brought Eugene along to serve as a means to make Nick out 'secret weapon' and elevate his story.

I will say though, this page is one of my favorite Eugene moments because I see the character I selfishly want Eugene to be in it. From the context of the panels above, this page is likely Williams telling them that only one will be fencing in State Championships, and this is their reaction. Eugene's immediate concern for Nick and the comforting hand on his shoulder followed by a bright smile and a thumbs up--he just cares so much about other people and it so used to smiling through his own pain/disappointment and comforts Nick through being positive (and as seen back in issue 12, up playing his competitiveness) and acting like it's no big deal.

Eugene deserved better, but if this is where he goes out, I think I can live with it. Better to see him go now than continue to be a means to uplift the rest of team by being less than. but, man, I was really hoping we were turning it around after his moment in REDEMPTION being the only KR boy not to lose his bout

anyway, thank you sm for listening to my rambles!!! <33

[chatxkilluaxnoir]

Reblogging this again to reblog a post showing just how cool, savage, insane, badass, and feral IDW Leo is!

Here is the amazing post! Please read it!!:

Also, another post that talks some about Leo's past life human self in IDW (yeah, IDW has a really cool reincarnation stuff man), and how Leo would totally have long, gorgeous hair, because he would man.

Here is that thread too:

And now here is a funny (but kind of sad too, if you know the context) meme post with IDW Leo and his Foot Leo "shadow self":

God; IDW's art is so gorgeous. And such great Leos in that meme post.

There is utterly amazing and tear-jerking post that talks about Leo post City-Fall arcs (I fricken AMAZING arc) that go into that arc's aftermath and recovery that are also really good. About when Leo finally came back to himself finally and realized he had a family (again) and wasn't alone (after The Shredder and the Kitsune fucked him up), and Leo was just so happy and relived about it and to Donnie, and just uuggghhh; read this post:

Like, look at Leo's happy and relived face there! He is so cute and sweet.

IDW and IDW Leo also gave us some sweet Leo, The Shredder, and Kitsune angst. The City Fall arc, the aftermath and recovery of that. Leo and Koya stuff. Just such good characterization and character arc(s) and/or development for Leo. Leo is insane in IDW too (like another post I mentioned above that talks about Feral Leo goes more into it and in the tags and/or replies of it); as he should be.

Also, he gave us, like I said, Foot Leo, and the look that spanned so much fanart and versions of Leo and stuff in that outfit/look or something similar to it. Like; he rocked the City Fall/Foot look so hard man.

For example, someone asked why Cupcake's Foot Leo is dressed like a wh*re, and they basically said that was basically IDW's fault, lol. Leo both in IDW and Cupcake's AU really rock that outfit though.

Here is the post, I am talking about:

Seriously; look how awesome Leo looks in his City Fall look; he rocks it so hard man.

Also, he got claw weapons man! Awesome!!!

Here is a banger, awesome redraw of IDW comic from that arc. Seriously; it is SO good and Leo looks so good:

I also love emo Leo too, my guy!

More panels of IDW Leo just looking awesome and so sweet and huggable and nice and cool!:

And I can't find that post, but there is a really good post that talks about how IDW Leo basically kept his promise of always being there and coming back for Mikey no matter what. Even when Raph and Leo had left (and I think this was after Splinter's death too), Leo was still there for his brother, Mikey no matter what.

Leo and Mikey is one of my favorite TMNT relationships, and God, is TMNT IDW a great portrayal of them not only as characters, but their relationship too.

And, this is a post from this competition actually, and I already talked about it indirectly some, but I will do so again, and more directly this time!:

If anyone who deserves this, because they have been through so much, it is IDW Leo.

Anyways, please, please vote IDW Leo!! He is so genuinely amazing, and one of the best versions of a character and one of the best characters in IDW and in TMNT in general!

Please vote for him!

And I know this isn't his poll, but for IDW Mikey too, I love '03 Casey with all my heart, but like IDW Leo, IDW Mikey is also one of the best characters in IDW, and just one of the best versions of a character and character in TMNT in general too!

So please vote for IDW Leo and Mikey! They deserve to win so much man (not saying the people they are going against don't, but you know what I mean). They are awesome!!

[jellyaibo]

ok so disclaimer: i literally started writing this almost immediately after i woke up so there will be a bunch of typos which i dont bother fixing cuz im still very tired

had a dream where tpot 3 came out and i think it was 2 hours long and it was this HUGE bfdi finale video that had ALL the bfb characters (except…the tpot guys???? excluding 2 they were here at some point i think) i remember not watching the whole thing cuz it was fucking late at night so i skipped to near the end but right before i did there was this ?? intro to the episode where its just cary in front of a greenscreen thianking everyone who watched battle for dream island and when he said this an image was shown on screen that looked like the "I HATE CHOCOLATE" lady from asoingbob. anyways before ihe could continue i skipped REALLY far in the video where 4 and x have everyone gathered by a stage

(drew this on my phone sorry it looks like dogshit i didnt feel like redrawing it SKDJHFSDJF)

he was gonna reveal…something?? but before that he started doing this REALLY sarcastic and 4th wall breaking speech that basically made fun of the osc and people that didn't like post split??? it was so fuckunf weird it felt like cary/michael/whoever wrote this was having a breakdown while writing yhat. but thankfully it was just a joke thing and all the contestants hated him for that because i think at some point during the speech 4 started making fun of them too??? i swear they described everyone as "marketable disney stereotypes" and went off abt each one like. ok

while listing off each contestants flaws on stage, loser suddenly TRIES TO interrupt 4 multiple times but it doesn't rlly work out (plus her voice is different?? kinda… i described it as "more manly and…hunk-y sounding" so take that wgat you will)

anyways loser was fed up w this and stands up to 4 and getd all of the other contestants to GET THEIR FUVKING ASS so all the contestants get up onto the stage and start destroying the thing that was under that tarp (it was some kind of bad machine thing?) and the whole time this was happening 4 was just going "ohhhh oh nooo" in the most deadpan monotone voice possible. and ooohh this descrution scene ends with loser flinging himself AND CAKE up into the air like this was some anime shit and she slammed into the machine with one fist while holding cake in the other arm. this made me fucking get out of my bed and start punching shit (very positive) oh my god i was freaking the fuck out here

i remember i coudlnt stop replaying that scene NOT ONLY CUZ IT WAS THE FIRST LOSER & CAKE INTERACTION IN . A FUCKING WHILE but i also wanted to take a screenshot of cake's face cuz he had the funniest expression (too lazy to draw it but he was blushing SO MUCH and also screaming cuz he was falling w loser) BUT I COULDNT TAKE A GOOD FUCKING SCREENSHOT SO. MOST OF THE REST OF THIS DREAM WAS ME ANXIOUSLY TRYING TO GET A SCREENSHOT OF THIS FUCKING THIGN. oh yeah also cake's design was slightly different, he just had a white (or light yellow) center rather than a darker brown one.

then after i THINK i managed to grab a screenshot i went on a rant w lan abot how forced??? loser's little arc felt cuz there was no buildup ig and i just ended up complaining abt post splt and how bad jnjs writing was

THE END thats all i remember, i woke up drenched in fcking sweat at 2 am cuz of this (/hj itsalso just really hot in my room)

[sarahwaraor]

NOTE: *Okay I’m confused on Tumblr’s submit multiple drawings in one post suddenly it’s this description I am writing now, and then continue submit art to the next????? I hope it doesn’t lower the quality because at my end it looks blur for some reason. Or probably this is the LONGEST post ever!??*

Lots of continuation here because I posted firstly at Twitter. 

So, time to copy paste my tweets from there to here. 

1.  I hope peeps arent bored of me draw MMZ characters into several movies/shows I watch. This is one of things if I feel artblock/mood. Also Dickinson is//chef kisses but in this case it’s not about Phantom & poem thingy, or you can imagine that too if want.

2. Continuation of Phantom mysteriously becomes invisible with changes from original episode, but quickly draw this; my free trial AppleTV expires tomorrow so gotta rewatch the episode ASAP. Hope tonight have time to do more continuation & some redraw favourite scenes in this episode!

3. Phantom: GOD NO I don’t want to hear my sister’s private life in this crucial time!

4. Phantom: Nah got no time to listen to my sister’s private life that I have no intention to intrude here but also if I’m the eldest brother I won’t be giving you my blessing either. 

Plio is just random oc I just made up to fit to an unloveable character from Dickinson series xD

5.  FINALLY finish the Phantom being invisible redraw scenes! Took long. The rest of the story go watch Dickinson if you’re interested!! don’t want to spoil much here. Also wanna draw other stuff. Enjoy!

6.  Bye Plio! xDDD 

If any curious what is Dickinson series, it’s a lesbian historical comedy drama series loosely based on real life poet Emily Dickinson, which it also touches the constraints of society, gender, & family in 19th century throughout her life... witha modern twist!! 

In MMZ au ofc change a bit. But seriously. That series is 10/10. I rarely gave full marks on media I consumed btw. Q_Q (probably because Dickinson saved and accompanied me when I was positive covid.) I laughed, I cry, I learnt a lot, especially it change my views on life and death and stuff. ANd also, they debunk the myths about Emily Dickinson!!! Go try watch it if you feel want to!

[unknownentry404]

So, I had this sudden itch to compare these two screenshots, and what I found makes me both melt and applaud Fortiche once again for their absolute excellence.

In case you haven’t already guessed, the first one is a screenshot I took from the the bedroom scene. And the second is the flash we see during the oh-shit-dont-damn-well-let-that-be-my-girlfriends-head-on-a-platter. . . “cupcake.” . . scene. . .

Yup. Fortiche couldn’t stand just putting a “halfass” screenshot in, they had to redraw it. I am 90% sure that is just a pure 2D drawing of Caitlyn and I’m about to flip a table over it-

(God it’s like playing where Waldo on crack, but to very obviously see the differences, look at the eyes, head size difference, the purple collar by the neck, and a missing swirly button).

From how I see it, there are a few reasons they did this (apart from just pure flex). First, as the second one is only a second long, (a/n the amount of seconds in this sentence makes me laugh omg), it needs to be clear and crisp enough to be easily recognisable and stuck in the viewers mind: cropped down, larger face, brighter white of the eyes. They need to be able to just flash it, and pow, you get it. Caitlyn might be dead yo- And Vi is going to be very distraught* if so.

(*this autocorrected to straight lol, and I need to send Apple a strongly worded letter now. ;))

But also, I think it’s also a showcase of Caitlyn through Vi’s eyes. Of Vi’s affection towards Cait, not the other way around.

In the bedroom scene, it’s mostly about Vi. Cait is listening to Vi talking about her childhood here, witnessing Vi being extremely vulnerable, and Cait’s expressions are sad and empathetic, as she feels Vi’s pain and tries to understand her and then console her.

But the second one is all about how Vi herself sees Caitlyn, and how she wants to protect her. About how vulnerable Caitlyn was when Vi left her behind, so much so that Jinx was able to take her. (It’s not Vi’s fault, ofc, but she still thinks it is). The wide, big eyes, the closeness, the open mouth. It’s very intimate and vulnerable. (Not to mention sensual, oh my).

Normally, Caitlyn’s design is all sharp lines and sharp features. But here she’s softer, gentler. And something, someone, Vi desperately wanted to protect, which she tried to do by leaving her, even if it didn’t work. . . And, now, this is the moment where Vi might just be about to see her dead mangled body, like her family before her. . .

TL;DR We don’t deserve Fortiche, and I’m not crying, you’re crying. ;D

[magioftheseas]

Artistic Vision

Summary: In which Nene models for Mei despite her insecurities.

Rating: G

Warning: There’s references to Nene’s body image issues and some body-shaming.

Notes: So, like MeiNene is also pretty underrated and I just thought the idea of Nene modeling was too good to resist. Hence, this fic. It’s pretty simplistic but it’s not very often that I get to tackle mundane issues and I hope I still did alright. I also hope we see more interactions from these two in the future.

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

The sun is setting, and she’s keeping a little anxious. Orange light filters through, casting the entire art room in an almost eerie, ethereal glow. Nene supposed it could make for quite the romantic scene—but rather than a boy confessing to her, she sits on a pedestal with her feet propped up.

Well, when you put it that way, it does still sound dreamy. I can imagine Aoi in this situation—except Aoi would be getting her face drawn.

Instead, Shijima is fixated on her feet. Her ankles, specifically, with such intensity that Nene almost wishes she could suck them into the depths of her skirt, never to be seen again. Except Shijima had begged her to be allowed to draw them.

“They’d make such a unique subject, Yashiro-san! So distinct! An absolute must to recreate!” she exclaimed. And Nene, desperate to please and easy when it came to flattery, couldn’t turn her down, even if the idea of someone staring at her swollen ankles for hours on end was—perhaps not the scenario she most dreamed about.

Shijima was still scribbling away. Her gaze intense behind her glasses, and it would’ve been flustering if Nene hadn’t gotten used to it after the first hour.

Being a model isn’t nearly as cool as I thought it’d be. I feel all stiff.

“Oh,” Shijima says suddenly, looking up at her. “Do you need a break, Yashiro-san?”

“M-Maybe a little.”

“Sorry, sorry.” Shijima waved her hand, ever friendly. “It’s been a while since I’ve had a human model. And I get too caught up. You know.”

“I know,” Nene echoed quietly. “But, I don’t mind sitting here. I would just...like some water and a minute to stretch out, maybe.”

“No problem. I’ll get you some.”

“I’d appreciate it!”

Shijima sets her sketchbook and pencils aside. She had used multiple ones, which all looked pretty fancy. Nene can only imagine what it would be like if she were having her portrait painted. Even now knowing how tedious modeling was, the idea was an exciting one.

“Such a beautiful, elegant, and perfect young lady you are, Nene-san!” The painter exclaimed. He was, of course, represented by a vaguely but incredibly attractive man. “I couldn’t possibly hope to capture your radiance!”

Nene only laughs, noble and ever so proper.

“As long as just a fraction of my beauty can be shared, it’s all I can wish for!”

“So generous! So humble! I love you so much, Nene-sama!”

Something like that, maybe?

“Ehehehehe.” Nene couldn’t help but giggle. “Oh no, I can’t possibly model for all of you...”

“It’s just me here, Yashiro-san,” Shijima reminded her. Nene yelped, but rather than comment further, Shijima just offers her a cup. “Here’s some water. Sorry that it’s room temperature.”

“T-That’s fine! It’s fine! I’m fine!” Nene took it and nearly downed all of it, nearly choking in the process. Shijima’s face twitched, but when Nene glanced her way, she was perfectly composed. Somehow, she didn’t feel at ease. “Shijima-san, um, you didn’t get any for yourself?”

“I’m fine,” Shijima chirped, much more convincingly than Nene could hope to be. She sits back down, once again taking her sketchbook. “You’re the one unused to all of this.”

“Aha,” Nene laughs dryly, sipping a bit more modestly. “I admit, I’ve only ever dreamed of being in this position before.”

“Was it everything you ever hoped it’d be?” Shijima asked.

“I... Not really.” Nene shook her head. “No offense to Shijima-san, but I was imagining something a little more romantic.”

“Romantic, huh,” Shijima droned, now tapping her pencil to the paper. “Right. There are people out there who think modeling can be more intimate than it actually is. Well. I could always ask to draw you naked—if you’re comfortable with that.”

Flustered, Nene shook her head much more furiously than before.

“J-Just my ankles are fine!”

“I was joking.” It hadn’t really sounded like a joke, but Nene was happy to brush it off regardless. “You know—it’s kind of weird. Talking with you like this.”

“Eh, why?” Nene asked. “We’re friends, aren’t we, Shijima-san?”

Shijima hummed.

“A model and their artist—have a bit of a different relationship than that of friends. But yeah, we’re friends. I was really happy when you agreed to model for me. I did really want to draw your ankles. They really do have such a unique shape.”

I don’t think I can take that positively even if Shijima-san means it that way.

“You’re so self-conscious about them,” Shijima did observe. “Covering them with your hand isn’t going to hide them, Yashiro-san.”

Nene retracted her hand, straightening out her legs even as it was embarrassing to do so. When her eyes inevitably lingered on those swollen ankles of hers, she found herself deflating.

“They’re unique,” she admitted. “But they’re not very attractive, are they?”

Shijima blinks at her. Nene quickly shrugged.

“I-I mean, as happy as I am to help you—I do wish I didn’t have these. These ankles, I mean. I mean...” Her shoulders trembled as she forced a laugh. “The make me look like a daikon. Daikons aren’t exactly known for being pretty.”

“You don’t think you’re pretty?”

I mean—there’s a reason why you’d rather draw my weird ankles instead of my face, right?

The question lingers on the tip of her tongue. Her face feels hot. She wonders what expression she must be making because it feels awfully twisted. She can’t even tell Shijima’s gaze right now, with those thick glasses as a barrier. All the same, she must surely be acting like an annoyance right now.

“Sorry. Just forget I said anything, Shijima-san.”

Shijima hums but she’s poised to resume drawing all the same.

“Straighten your back please, Yashiro-san. Your posture needs to be the same as before.”

Nene does so. After a few more adjustments, she returned to how she should be, and Shijima resumed.

“I should be done in a bit. You can still keep drinking water, Yashiro-san. Just don’t move your feet.”

Nene nodded, taking another sip.

“I just said not to move, Yashiro-san.”

“A-Ack, sorry! Sorry, sorry!”

“I’m joking, you’re fine.”

“Eh.” That didn’t sound like much of a joke... “Okay, then.”

She fixes her posture all the same, ever self-conscious. Shijima doesn’t make a second remark and her face is still stoic. Unreadable. If Nene hadn’t seen her excitable before, she’d wonder if Shijima could emote at all.

That’s such a judgy thought. She reprimanded herself. Aoi would be ashamed of you, Nene.

Still—since she was thinking of Aoi again, she wondered something else.

Shijima-san is comfortable with me because we’re friends. But there might be other people she’d rather draw.

“Even without looking at your face, I can tell you’re deep in thought,” Shijima remarked then, making her flinch. “Careful, Yashiro-san. Seriously. Don’t move that much.”

“S-Sorry, I was just taken aback!” she exclaimed. “I-I mean, you’re so stern sometimes but—you’re pretty perceptive too, Shijima-san. I guess that’s the eye of an artist for you.”

Shijima makes a non-committal hum.

“I know you said to forget before,” Shijima began. “But—sorry, Yashiro-san. I’m still bothered by it. You’re so harsh on yourself just for—what? Your uniquely swollen ankles?”

“Slender legs are prettier,” Nene said, just a tad more frustrated than she wanted to be. “Guys don’t like thick legs. They don’t care for thick ankles, either.”

“I think they’re artistically inspiring,” Shijima replied. “In fact, when you enroll in college, you should maybe see if you can model for figure drawing classes.”

“While does sound nice,” Nene murmurs, definitely thinking of admiring college boys before shattering that fantasy with her own metaphorical fists. “I’d rather not get leered at like a shrunken head in an oddities museum.”

Shijima adjusts her glasses. She pauses in erasing.

“Is that how you see it? What a shame. But—I guess that’s just what it is, being concerned about stuff like that. I wouldn’t know—with how unremarkable I look, I don’t get much attention. And I don’t really care to, either.” She resumes, sighing as she does. “But—I do love drawing your ankles. And I think—they’re beautiful in their distinction. You shouldn’t judge yourself by narrow beauty standards. Those aren’t just limiting, they’re destructive. And the people who prefer them are often impossible to please anyway.”

Ah, huh. Shijima-san sounds—pretty mature, just then. Still. Still.

“Who’d want an ugly chick with fat daikon legs?”

Nene’s hands fist into her dress for a while before she forces herself to relax.

“Done,” Shijima droned and with an actual smile, she turns her sketchbook around to show off her work. “What do you think, Yashiro-san?”

“Yeah,” Nene said distantly, nodding and swallowing. “Those are—definitely my ankles.”

It was eerie how perfect a recreation they were. Nene could see in horrifying detail how rounded they were, how even her feet looked big, toes too curled and the arches too defined. When was the last time she did her nails? They desperately needed a clipping, and oh god, had she missed hair on her legs the last time she shaved—?!

But, somehow, in the midst of her spiral, Nene did notice Shijima’s fingers. Stained with graphite. She noticed how the paper had been crinkled from having to redraw parts several times over. The recreation was perfect—only because Shijima had been so insistent. And Shijima looked so proud of it, too, even though Nene hated the look of them so much.

Blinking, Nene could ultimately only smile in return.

“You did a great job, Shijima-san.”

Whatever she sees—she’s passionate about. That must count for something.

“You weren’t too bad of a model,” Shijima said. “Can we do this again sometime, Yashiro-san?”

She hesitated but she ended up nodding, smile tightening.

I want to see what she sees one of these days.

[firebrands]

Adjacent, Against, Upon

Steve Rogers/Tony Stark; Explicit; Politics AU (Steve is a candidate and Tony is his campaign manager); 10k+ words

also on ao3

*

The room was silent save for the sound of the news anchor recapping the videoclip they'd just played.

Imperceptibly, Tony's hand clenched into a fist. Natasha sighed and turned back to her laptop, scrolling through tweets mentioning Steve.

"They should be here soon," Bruce said quietly, looking up from his phone. "Next engagement is just the dinner with the veterans tonight."

"Okay," Tony said, his voice calm. His knuckles were white.

"—follow up on the profiles for tomorrow, I want to know who were meeting and what questions they'll be asking," Steve continued to say as he opened the door as Pepper trailed behind him.

"What the fuck was that?" Tony barked, turning to Steve.

Steve looked up from his phone. "What?" Pepper, too, had stopped in her tracks.

"What the fuck—" Tony gestured to the TV, "was that?"

"Tony," Steve said, his tone measured but eyes hard, "let's talk inside my office." Steve had crossed the room and his hand was at the door. "Come on," he beckoned.

Tony stared at him for a few seconds before walking out.

The team, at this point used to these outbursts, dutifully turned back to their respective laptops. Steve shut his eyes and breathed for a few seconds before entering his office and shutting the door.

After a beat, everyone crowded around Clint and Sam. “So what caused it?” Bruce asked. Clint shrugged, eyes never leaving his laptop as he sorted through photos.

“Come on,” Natasha said, reaching out and stilling Clint’s hand from clicking on his mouse.

“Some vet brought it up?” Clint said. “I mean, maybe that was it?”

“I don’t think we should be… you know. Be hypothesizing. Anyway. Steve might hear.” Sam said, eyeing Steve’s closed door. They could all see him through the slits in the blinds; he was pacing while reading one of the papers from on the pile on his desk. Silently, everyone willed him not to pull out his phone and check Twitter.

“The one time I don’t attend an event,” Natasha said, frustrated. Everyone avoided her eyes. “I’m going to talk to Tony,” Natasha said, getting up and heading to the door.

"Hey," Natasha said, as she stepped outside.

"Don't," Tony said, and raised a hand towards her. “Do not.” Tony took a long drag from his cigarette before he tossed his pack to Natasha.

"Media's not even trying to contact me about it," Natasha said after she lit her cigarette. “They’ve just been playing the clip on loop.”

“Figures,” Tony said, stubbing out his cigarette in the ashtray. “Fuck this. Fuck it all to hell, and fuck him,” Tony said as he adjusted his tie. “What a fucking idiotbrained—” Tony stopped when he saw Nat looking up at him, expression calm.

“It’s not that bad,” she said.

“I’ll handle it. Doesn’t mean I don’t get to be pissed off about having to handle it.” Tony fiddled with his tie some more before deciding to take it off. “Also ensure that you never miss an event with media attendees.”

“You don’t need to tell me twice,” Natasha voice had a sharp edge to it.

Tony stuffed his tie into his pocket as he stepped back inside the office and headed towards Steve’s room. Clint was helping Sam choose footage for editing, and Pepper and Bruce were looking through tweets on her laptop.

Tony took a steadying breath before pulling the door open.

Steve looked up from his stack of papers, eyebrow arched. “Hope you’re happy with that display,” he said.

“I could say the same to you.” Tony reached over Steve’s desk for a whiteboard marker and flicked the blinds to Steve’s office shut. “What were you thinking?” Tony didn’t look to see his reaction, instead redrawing a table on Steve’s windows from memory: Key message, supporting pillars. The red ink was bright against the background of the white blinds. “I mean you just. Just, totally, you know, fucked everything and—”

Behind him, Steve sighed. Tony startled as he felt Steve’s hand on his elbow, stopping his scribbling. “I told you from the start that I didn’t want to lie. About anything. And I knew back then that that would cause trouble — and that's what I hired you for, right?" There was a small quirk to Steve lips, and his eyes searched Tony for any form of acceptance.

Tony looked down at Steve's hand, which hadn't left his elbow. Steve, belatedly taking notice, pulled it away quickly.

"Look, Steve. Today was supposed to be easy," Tony said, the metal of the marker clicking against the glass. "We were just supposed to drill down your commitment to addressing the issue of homeless veterans. Everyone supports veterans. This should’ve been a slam dunk for you." Tony pulled down on his cuffs, one of his tells of when he was impatient. "Now... Now no one cares about that. Did you think of that before you answered that question?"

*

As usual, the media had swarmed around Steve as he left the venue — this time, a high school auditorium they'd rented out to house different stakeholders supporting Steve's advocacy for vets. After delivering his speech and answering some questions, the floor had been opened for the vets to share their own stories, for them to talk about their difficulties settling back into civilian life, and some stories of how the army had just fucked them over.

Bucky had led Steve out of the exit towards the waiting van, a hand held in front of them in vain attempt to keep media away from them.

“Mr. Rogers, can we get a statement? There’s a Twitter account that’s posted numerous photos—“

“No questions please,” Bucky said gruffly, angling his body to better box them out. Steve made eye contact with the reporter, a young man who’d been trailing the campaign and doing everything possible to try and get a scoop over everyone else. Either he’s just an overeager reporter, Tony had told him, or he’s a blogger — either way, steer clear and stick to your talking points.

“Mr. Rogers, is it you in the photo? Can we get a statement on your sexuality?” A phone was shoved in his face, and Steve’s cheeks went red with memory. It was from years ago, fresh out of college at someone’s party—

“Look buddy, I don’t see how that’s any of your business—” Bucky said, turning away from Steve and facing the journalist squarely.

“Isn’t it my business? Is it you, Steve? We deserve to know!” The reporter pressed, his body flush against Bucky’s, a phone trained at Steve’s face, recording his reactions. Steve’s eyebrows were furrowed, a scowl on his face. In a flash, he remembered the stories of the veterans who had been sent home without a dime just because of who they loved.

“Yes it is, Jonah, that’s me.” Steve said. Bucky turned to him, mouth open. Steve had stopped just a few paces from the car and squared his shoulders. The rest of the crowd had stopped with him, vibrating with anticipation for his next words.

“Yes, I’m gay,” he said. There was a beat, and the only sound came from Clint’s camera as he took a photo of the scene, then: The crowd erupted into questions, and Steve frowned for a second before he caught himself, then waved before stepping into the SUV.

“Holy fucking shit,” Steve heard Clint his to Sam as they settled into the back seat. And then, the voice was directed at him: “Holy fucking shit, Steve.”

“Shut up,” Bucky said from the driver’s seat, turning the wheel to pull out of the parking lot. “Everyone shut up.”

Steve was thankful for the silence, his body still wound tight with tension - what had come over him? He sucked in a large breath and looked outside. “What’s up next again, Pepper?”

Pepper turned to him from the passenger’s seat. “Sir, we’re just on the way back to the office. Tony’s likely going to want a debrief about this.”

“Of course,” Steve said. His gaze met Bucky’s in the rearview mirror before Steve closed his eyes and rested his head against the cool window, steeling himself for the conversation to come.

*

“This isn’t going to do your numbers any favors,” Tony said flatly, scrolling through reports on his phone.

Steve has the courtesy to act chastened as he looked at Tony from where he leaned on his desk. “Wouldn’t this work in our favor though? Make me, you know. Relatable or whatever?”

“Or whatever,” Tony said, doing air quotes and rolling his eyes. “We could’ve had both demographics on your side and now we’ll have one. I don’t see how that works in your favor.”

“Look, Tony, I’m not naive enough to think that my platform will convert the crazy homophobes, but there’s got to be—”

“Steve. It’s my job to figure out the demographics and your messaging and how to spin this right.” Tony doesn’t have to say that Steve’s made his team’s job much harder for it, doesn’t need to say it. “Maybe next time just… run your ideas by the team before you execute. If that’s possible.”

Steve ran a hand through his hair and sighed, staring at the table Tony had drawn on his window in an effort to keep himself from staring at Tony, instead.

“Anyway,” Tony said with a jolt, “I’m going to discuss tomorrow’s itinerary with the team. Along with everything else.”

“I’ll join you,” Steve said, straightening up and walking towards the door. He rested his hand on the small of Tony’s back as he led him out of the room. “I should probably say something, right?”

“Like an apology?” Tony laughed, turning to Steve as he pushed the door open. “God forbid you begin that habit now.” Steve huffed, dropping his hand from Tony’s back as he walked away. His hand tingled at the loss of warmth.

“I just want to reassure them that this isn’t that big of a deal,” Steve said. “I mean, it shouldn’t be, not anymore.”

“What do—Oh, Steve, seriously, it’s fine. No one gives a fuck. We can just go straight to our next steps,” Tony said.

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled through his mouth. “Obviously it’s not fine, and everyone gives a fuck!” Steve snapped.

“You’re making as big a deal as the rest of them,” he said, quieter.

Tony furrowed his brow. “Of course I am. Now they’ve identified a—well. I wouldn’t call it a weakness, but it’s certainly something that’ll draw people away from your platform and policies. I meant—I meant the team is fine. None of us are judging you. Frankly I’m a bit insulted that you’d think they would.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth—”

“That’s what you pay me to do!”

Steve raised his hands, placating. “Sorry. Sorry. I just, I knew this was bound to happen eventually, and I was hoping to do it on my own terms. Certainly not in the parking lot of a high school.” Steve turned away and rubbed his temples. “There should be a bootcamp for this,” he added, smiling ruefully.

“Well, there isn’t. And the team’s fine. Maybe a bit shocked at how quickly you got triggered to just throw it out there, but we’re used to rolling with the punches.” Tony clapped a hand on Steve’s shoulder and squeezed, in a gesture meant to be comforting.

“Well. It’s what I pay you for, right?”

Steve’s small campaign team had assembled in their largest meeting room: The Pantry. The still-relatively small room as a snug fit for all of them, as they had crowded around the two square tables and pushed appliances around to make room.

Bruce had dutifully wheeled in a whiteboard for Tony to write on, and everyone had rearranged the seating to face the board. In the corner, Clint was shovelling ramen into his mouth like he hadn’t eaten in days. There was one chair in the middle of them all that was saved for Steve.

“Hey,” Tony said, twirling a pen in his hands. Steve cleared his throat. “Okay, well—go do,” Tony said, motioning to the space the team had made in front of the whiteboard.

“Hi team,” Steve said, nodding at them. “Today was, in a word, unexpected. But I know we’ll be okay, I know I’ll be okay, because you’ve got my back. We’ve weathered worse before, and I know that a month from now, we’ll all be in City Hall, laughing about the time a reporter pissed me off enough to get me to come out.” A small rumble of laughter rolled throughout the team. Steve smiled. “That’s all, really. Now, on to Tony’s capable hands.”

Tony rolled his eyes and bowed mock-graciously, “Thank you, sir. So main plan is deflect the shit out of this. Reporter comes and asks, ‘Hey Steve, so you’re gay,’ and the answer is ‘So what? It’s 2019, fuck that noise.’ Got it? Good.”

Bruce snorted and noisily opened his notebook. “Copy, boss.”

“Okay so: No media at the dinner tonight,” Tony said uncapping a marker and taking notes on the board. “Tomorrow morning we have?”

Pepper huffed from her perch on the couch Sam was seated on. “Roundtable interview with the Globe.”

Tony’s hand stopped scribbling. “I thought that was on Friday?”

“It’s Thursday today, Tony,” Bruce said.

From the corner, Steve started to laugh. “I want to say I’m sorry, but I’m really not.” Tony scowled at him before turning back to the board. “Okay, whatever, fine, a media roundtable, Bruce—”

“Revise talk points for tomorrow,” Bruce nodded at Tony.

“Prioritize our holding statement, I want it out before the dinner. Nat, anyone hounding you yet?”

“Just a few, most reporters are still covering Pierce’s event. We should expect him to say something about it, too.” Natasha said, eyes on her laptop which was balanced on her lap.

“Yeah, obviously. So, okay. Bruce, get out of here and write. Pep, update him after.” Bruce stood up and stretched before walking out of the pantry.

“Okay, next?” Tony said, turning back to Pepper.

“Then we have lunch with the Governor, and then a forum at the community college. Should be done with the day by five.”

“Fantastic,” Tony said, shaking his head. This was going to be a headache and a half. Steve smiled sheepishly at the rest of them, and said, “At least it’s not boring.”

*

The office always looked eerie at night, the sheer blackness seeming to leak out of the spaces in the blinds. That could be a metaphor, if he wanted it to be. But he doesn’t.

Steve pulled out his keys to unlock the door, but found it open. He made a small sound of displeasure, turning the knob. Must have been Bruce or Tony, they were the ones who usually stayed up the latest, he thinks to himself. Steve pushed the door open and the light from Tony’s office illuminated the floor. Brow furrowed in confusion, he slowly made his way there.

Tony was standing with his back to him, reading on his tablet.

“What are you doing here?” Steve said, hand holding Tony’s door open.

Tony whirled around in surprise and almost dropped his glass. “Fuck!” He yelped, scrambling, then, “I fucking work here???” Tony answered, shrilly. “When did you become a super spy?”

“Sorry, sorry,” Steve said, placing his hands on Tony’s shoulders in an attempt to ground the both of them. “I think I left my planner in my office,” he says, by way of explanation.

“Your what.” Tony said.

“My… planner? With my notes? And schedule?” Steve squinted at him, confused.

“A planner,” Tony said. “You—you know you have a phone, right? With like, a calendar synced across the team and with emails and, you know, a virtual notepad for your to-do list, do you even still have a to-do list, isn’t it all just Pepper,” Tony said, laughing a bit. “What the fuck, Steve.”

Steve smiled, rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. “It sticks more when I write it down,” he said, by way of explanation.

Tony rolled his eyes fondly. “Sure. Okay. Clearly not sticking enough or you’d have remembered the round table interview you’re having later, before you—”

Steve glared at him and Tony stopped, then rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he said, walked back inside his office to and picked up where he left off.

“Found it,” Steve said, peeking into Tony’s room and waving his planner up triumphantly. “Congratulations, crisis averted,” Tony said from his desk, nodding at Steve.

Steve huffed out a laugh. “Are you drinking on the job?” Steve walked into Tony’s room and held up Tony’s bottle of whiskey, and scrunched up his nose as he scrutinized it.

“Technically this is overtime work. I’m not on the clock,” Tony smirked and plucked the bottle from Steve’s hands.

Steve tsked. “Well if that’s the case, pour me one.”

Tony looked up from his laptop, measuring. “It’s late.”

“Technically, it’s early.”

“Steve.”

“Tony.”

Their gazes held, seeing who would back down first. Then, with a small sigh, Tony opened his bottom drawer and pulled out another glass, pouring Steve a drink. “I guess we deserve it.”

Steve took the glass from Tony and nodded in thanks. “Cheers,” Steve said. “To your bad temper and my constant headaches,” Tony said, laughing.

They drank in companionable silence on the couch in Tony’s office until Steve started to feel a pleasant buzz at the base of his skull. He was exhausted. So was Tony, but he always was. How couldn’t he be? It’s not like Steve had made it easy for him.

“How did the dinner go?” Tony asked.

“Fine,” Steve said, before resting his head in his hands.

Tony reached over and placed his hand on Steve’s shoulder, rubbing slowly over the soft fabric of Steve’s sweater. Steve rubbed at his temples uselessly.

Above him, Tony said, “I want to lie down.”

“Okay,” Steve said, noncommittal. He didn’t want to move, at least for a few more minutes. But Tony got up from the couch and motioned for Steve to do the same.

Steve was confused for a second, but instead of focusing on it, ambled over to Tony’s desk to pour himself another drink. Tony pushed his coffee table out of the way before reaching under the cushions to pull out the bed.

“Why don’t I have one of these?” Steve asked, frowning at the sofabed now unfurled in front of them.

“Because you shouldn’t sleep in your office,” Tony said, matter-of-fact.

Steve hummed in response and sipped his whiskey.

Tony grinned at him and plunked down on the bed, untucking his shirt for maximum comfort. Then, Tony stretched and let out a groan. “That’s the stuff,” he said, before patting the space beside him. “Come on.”

“Huh?”

“Lie down for a bit.”

Steve opened and closed his mouth a few times, his brain tripping over itself as it dutifully supplied reasons as to why he absolutely could not rest, at all, maybe ever, for the next month and a half. Also: What? Steve thought, helplessly.

Tony grumbled and waved him down. “Come on,”

Steve looked down at Tony and stopped himself from letting too much fondness deep into his smile. Then, he finished his drink, toed off his shoes, and lay down. Steve sighed as he felt his body settle into the thin cushion of the bed.

“See? It’s nice.” Tony said, eyes closed and lips quirked in the warm smile of victory.

Soon, Steve felt himself falling in and out of sleep, and almost imperceptibly felt the cushion dip as Tony shifted, trying to get comfortable.

Steve turned and opened his eyes to be greeted the faint dusting of pink on Tony’s cheeks, the smell of whiskey wafting over the both of them. He squinted, checking to see if Tony was awake. And then, Tony’s arm was over Steve’s chest, his warm body flush against him.

Steve held his breath and felt something soft and quiet bloom inside him. Ah, fuck. He shifted a bit closer and shut his eyes, willing away responsibility and reveling in the feeling of being touched. “Move your head,” Tony mumbled, then tucked his arm under Steve’s neck.

They continued to move around until they lay down comfortably wrapped around each other. Steve was quiet, afraid of breaking the spell. Friends could do this, get drunk and hug it out after a bad day. This is friendly, he reminded himself. Above him, Tony’s eyes were closed peacefully, and he shifted a bit so his nose was buried in Steve’s hair. Steve turned his head, and realized too late that he was too close—his mouth brushed against Tony’s neck, and in an effort to make it, well, not a kiss, Steve let his lips rest there.

They were quiet. Steve willed his body to remain relaxed as he inhaled Tony’s scent: Smoky, whiskey, and a bit of spice.

They were quiet for a long time, the air conditioning’s quiet hum the only sound in the room.

And then: “Hey, we’re not going to—“ Tony said to Steve’s hair.

“No, nope,” Steve said, his lips brushing against Tony’s neck with every word.

“Right. Okay.” Tony said, adjusting his arm to pat Steve’s shoulder.

“Yup. Fantastic.” Steve said, suddenly stilted and hoping he didn’t sound it.

They lay for a few more minutes before Steve pulled away, struggling against the pull of sleep and the comfort of Tony’s chest.

“It’s late,” he said, sitting up.

“Technically, it’s early,” Tony said, smirking up at him from the bed. His shirt was rumpled, and Steve tore his gaze away from he exposed skin of Tony’s neck. His lips had just been there. Half of him wishes he’d done something. The other half had retreated into a small corner of his brain and was digging a grave for this memory.

“This was nice, though,” Steve said, and meant it.

“Yeah. Let’s do it again some time,” Tony said, sitting up as well.

Steve smiled at him before standing up. “Thanks for the drink. I owe you one.” Why do I keep smiling. Idiot.

Tony scratched his neck, nonchalant. “Yeah, you got a running tab.”

Steve huffed out a laugh before turning away to pick up his planner on Tony’s desk. “You should get some sleep. On a real bed,” he said.

“That an invitation?” Tony grinned, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“For cuddles? Sure.”

“Aw come on, you were supposed to blush at that.”

Steve smiled at Tony again as he walked to the door. “Can’t make it weird anymore, Tones!” He said, sing-song, in an effort to sound like nothing mattered.

Steve was a few steps out of Tony’s door and Tony suddenly pushed his door open. “Hey, Steve?”

Steve stopped and turned to face Tony. “Yeah?”

“We’re okay, right?”

Steve arched his eyebrow. “Yes…?”

“Okay, just, you know. Making sure.”

Steve nodded at him, resolute now that there was space between them. “Sometimes people just need some hugs,” he said.

“Yes. Yeah,” Tony said. He nodded to himself. “Okay. Good night.”

Steve waved at him as he walked off. Yes. Yeah. Okay. People just need hugs.

*

“I thought I told you to get some rest on an actual bed.”

Tony woke up slowly, and Steve could tell the moment he registered Steve standing at the foot of his couch, shaking him awake. Tony made a small sound of reluctance before he brought his wrist to his face to check the time.

Steve sat down on Tony’s coffee table and held up a mug. “Good morning, Tony,” he said.

Tony groaned and sat up. “Why are you here,” he said, voice raspy. Steve nudged Tony’s knee with the mug, and Tony looked down at its contents before taking it. “Thanks,” he added.

“I wanted to go through the talk points Bruce wrote,” Steve said, sipping from his own cup.

“Why?”

“I don’t really agree with—”

Tony held up his finger as he gulped down his coffee. “Okay,” he said, putting down the half empty mug. “Now I’m alive. Again?”

“With how we’re communicating our stance on sustainability,” Steve continued, as if Tony hadn’t interrupted him.

“Okay, what about it?” Tony stood up and walked over to his desk, powering up his laptop.

“I just feel like it’s too conversational? I want to highlight the big facts and processes, things we’ll actually enact,” Steve said, rising from Tony’s coffee table and following Tony.

Tony was scrolling through the Q&A sheet Bruce and Natasha had worked on the night before, with expected questions and bullet-point answers. Steve leaned down and read over Tony’s shoulder.

“While I understand where you’re coming from, we crafted these to make sure you get the soundbites in,” Tony’s voice had taken a mollifying tone that Steve has gotten used to; it’s the tone of deference. Steve hated it and he’d never get used to it.

Tony leaned back on his chair and looked up at Steve, waiting.

“But issues shouldn’t be reduced to soundbites,” Steve said, leaning back on the desk and looking down at Tony. Tony, whose shirt was still untucked and rumpled. Tony, who still managed to look handsome in spite of his chronic lack of sleep.

“Steve,” Tony said, his jaw tightening. “We’ve talked about this.”

“I know, Tony, but I don’t like it.” Steve said. “We should be better than that.”

“It’s an hour before the interview,” Tony replied, already reaching for his phone. Steve glanced outside of Tony’s office: Pepper and Natasha were talking and pointing at something on Natasha’s laptop; Clint and Bucky were looking through photos; Sam was on his phone, video camera resting on his lap. Bruce was probably in the pantry, then.

“So Bruce has an hour.”

Tony didn’t look at Steve.

*

Everyone had given up on pretending they couldn’t feel the tension come off in waves from Steve’s office. They’d abandoned furtively sneaking glances and were all openly watching Tony gesticulate wildly at Steve.

Steve kept shaking his head. Tony was pacing and looking up at the ceiling while talking, as if pleading with some higher power. Then, Pepper’s phone buzzed with an alarm. Everyone turned to look at her phone, and then at her.

“Okay kids, it’s showtime,” She said, drawing herself up to her full height before she walked up to Steve’s room.

Steve must’ve seen her arrival in the corner of his eye, because he got up from his chair.

“You and I both know you’ll say whatever the hell you want to anyway!” Tony said, his back to Pepper.

Pepper coughed delicately into her fist. Tony’s body went rigid and he turned to her.

“We need to leave now, sir,” she said, smiling at the two of them as if nothing was wrong. Steve nodded at Pepper and picked up his jacket from his chair, adjusting his cuffs before putting it on.

“Do better,” he said to Tony, before shutting the door behind him.

*

Steve snuck a glance at his watch and turned back to a student who had used the question and answer portion of the event as a soapbox. “In sum, I think there should be an ordinance that requires community colleges to start vermicomposting. What do you think, Mr. Rogers?” she finished, a bit out of breath from speaking for so long.

Steve smiled at her. “Thank you for your question, and for your great input,” He started. “I do think vermicomposting is fascinating,” he added, “But it’ll be difficult to monitor with such a large scale. I do agree though that we need to look into different forms of waste management, particularly on the level of schools.”

In front of him, he saw Pepper whisper to the moderator. Almost time, then. The moderator stood and delivered a short message thanking Steve for his time, thanking the students for listening and participating, and then calling over the student organizers for a photo.

Steve stood in the middle of them all and flashed a wide smile. Beside him, one of the students turned to him and whispered, “Thanks, sir, for coming out yesterday.” Steve ducked his head to hear him better. “You’re really brave. I hope I can be that brave one day,” the boy continued.

“What’s your name?” Steve asked. Around him, the students had noticed and formed a small circle.

“Jason,” the boy said. Steve shook his hand and smiled. “Well Jason, thank you, too.”

*

Steve knew they were talking about him. He hated that there was an invisible wall between him and the team, one born out of necessity and propriety, one that said, you’re our candidate first, and unlikely friend second.

Steve leaned against the side of the door and listened. Bucky watched him from the couch, frowning. They’d just arrived from a friendly breakfast with other candidates in the slate, and for an hour, none of them talked shop. It was nice. And now, Steve had come back to an empty office and he knew, he knew that the team had taken the opportunity to discuss where they were at without him.

“You still have a month,” a vaguely familiar voice—Steve frowned. Nick? They’d invited Nick over to talk. Nick, a retired campaign manager who’d run Steve’s numbers before he even announced his decision to run, and who Tony had tapped to run focus group discussions on Steve’s taglines.

“And a half,” Tony supplied. The rest of the room had gone quiet, as if they’d known they were being eavesdropped on.

“We’ll just need our events to be harder working,” Tony said. “And buy more airtime.”

“Will do,” Natasha answered.

“Anyway, these are still unofficial numbers, right?” Bruce said, sounding hopeful.

Nick snorted. “You’re still down by 5 points.”

“He should be back soon,” Pepper chimed in, and then followed sounds of the team packing up, getting ready to file out.

Steve pushed himself off the wall and stalked back to his office. He wondered how Tony would break the news to him.

(He didn’t.)

*

Steve woke up to one message on Monday morning, but didn't read it until he was done with his run, had showered, and had a cup of coffee. He’d taken Tony’s advice to heart—advice he’d given after Steve announced his decision to run against the incumbent Mayor Alexander Pierce.

“If you want to make it to the end and keep your sanity intact, keep a routine,” Tony had said, all those months ago. “Shouldn’t be hard, with your background.” So Steve kept at his normal routine: Up at six, ready for work by eight, bed by midnight, at the latest. Well. He’d kept to most of his routine, anyway. No one could sensibly expect him to sleep when he needed to.

Steve was fully dressed when he flicked his phone back to life to pull up the message.

Do not turn on the TV. Meeting at Nick & Nat at 9. I’ll bring bagels.

Steve sighed, put down his phone, and turned on the TV.

*

Tony and Pepper were in the office when Steve and Bucky arrived. Bucky made a beeline for the pantry, drawn in by the offer of bagels, and generally uninterested in the numbers that would be discussed. All the needed to know was Steve’s schedule, and it riled him up to be up close to the politicking.

Tony and Pepper looked up from Tony’s laptop. “Good morning,” Pepper said, evenly. “I’ll go talk to Bucky about today’s itinerary,” she added, excusing herself.

“Have a seat. And a bagel,” Tony said, shutting his laptop and pouring himself what Steve guessed would be his second coffee of the day. Steve nodded, spreading cream cheese on a bagel, mostly to give himself something to do. He wasn’t really hungry.

“I’m assuming you turned on your TV. Or checked Twitter. Both? Maybe both.”

Steve hummed in response before taking a sizeable bite of the bagel, which was overflowing with cheese.

Tony stared at him for a beat, and then looked away.

Natasha and Nick arrived at nine on the dot. Natasha and Tony sat down beside Steve as Nick connected his laptop to the TV, ready with the survey results that they’d all already seen, anyway.

“So Pierce maintains his lead, and you’re down five points,” Nick skipped the pleasantries and dove right in, as he always did.

Tony, Steve, and Natasha were quiet. Tony patted Steve’s thigh, and let his hand rest there. Steve was grateful for the distraction.

Nick sighed, and began breaking down the demographics.

*

After the meeting with Nick, Tony had stalked out of the room, pack of cigarettes in hand.

“Those’ll kill you, you know.” Steve said, shutting the door to the office behind him.

Tony was scowling at his phone. And then he was scowling at Steve.

Steve shrugged in response.

“You never told me why, you know.” Tony said, apropos of nothing.

“What do you mean?”

“Why you had to say it. Why then,” Tony said, cigarette hanging out of his mouth as he adjusted the cuff of his sleeve that had begun to roll down.

Steve stared at his mouth, then noticed himself staring. “Say what?” He asked, dumbly.

“Why you had to come out while everyone was streaming that ambush interview,” Tony said plucking the cigarette out of his mouth after taking a drag.

“I did tell you. I said I didn’t want to lie.”

“Well you didn’t have to fucking answer him, either!” Tony was suddenly all cold fury. Steve felt his stomach tighten, ready for a fight.

“There was a boy, last week, you know.” Steve said, his hands had balled into fists in an effort to calm down. “He thanked me. He thanked me for coming out.”

“Well that’s just lovely,” Tony’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “Maybe his one vote will beat out Pierce’s hundreds.”

“Maybe it will,” Steve ground out. “How many times do I need to say that I didn’t want to lie?”

“Well if you didn’t want to lie then you could’ve fucking told me!”

“I didn’t know sexuality was integral to a campaign!” Steve yelled, feeling off balance and defensive.

“It is if that’s what costs the campaign!” Tony said sharply, crushing his cigarette viciously against the ashtray. “For chrissake can’t you just stick to your goddamn talk points,” he finished, voice lower, eyes not meeting Steve’s.

Steve’s inhaled sharply. “I’m not some puppet you can dangle around,” he said. “I’m not paying you to write talk points. I’m paying you to win.”

*

Tony didn’t really talk to him much, after that. Maybe Steve read too much into it. But his schedule had been filled to the brim and it’s not like he had much time to read into anything, anyway.

*

It was week before the elections. Steve sent Bucky home after dinner, opting to go over paperwork in his office rather than his desk at home. The rest of the office was dark, and the team had left for a few Saturday night drinks, taking advantage of the unspoken truce of Sunday.

Steve startled at the sudden stop of music that was emanating through the shared wall between his office and Tony’s.

“Hi,” Tony said from Steve’s door, he looked tentative has he held up a bottle and two glasses pinched between his fingers.

Steve sighed. “I am Very Tired,” he said, enunciating his last two words.

Tony let himself into Steve’s office and placed the bottle and two glasses on Steve’s desk. “Hello, Very Tired. I have a bottle of gin and some bad ideas.”

Steve couldn’t help but smile at Tony, who had settled into the seat across him. Tony waited for Steve’s permission.

“Let’s see what shit sticks, then,” Steve said, and popped open the bottle. “This… certainly smells dangerous,” he said, the smell of gin and spices filling the room.

Tony huffed out a laugh and visibly relaxed, taking the glass Steve offered him. They drank in silence and Steve continued reading reports and signing papers. Tony left and came back with his laptop, and soon the only sounds between them were the soft taps of Tony typing out emails.

Steve stood up and stretched before refilling his glass and then slumping down on his couch. He knew that he wouldn’t be as productive seated there, it was too comfy—it had no business being that comfy in an office.

“This couch has no business being so comfy in my office,” Steve said, as he held up the first draft of his final campaign speech. He stared at the paper and waited for the letters to stop swimming.

Steve looked up, feeling Tony’s gaze on him. Tony was watching Steve from beneath his lashes, and Steve felt his breath catch. Steve turned back down to his speech quickly, clicking and unclicking his pen.

Sometime during Steve’s brave attempts at reading and Not Looking at Tony, Tony got up from his chair and had reclined on Steve’s couch, drinking as he scrolled on his phone. His knees were bent and his head was pillowed by his arm, keeping his head high enough so he didn’t struggle to sip from his glass.

Without thinking, Steve tapped his lap twice: An invitation that Tony took without missing a beat. Steve smiled and let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d held. Once Tony had settled, Steve found his hand drawn to Tony’s soft hair, stroking it absently as he juggled between reading, and drinking, and refilling his glass, with one hand.

Tony had made small noises of pleasure that lit a fire in Steve’s gut. He prayed that it wouldn’t manifest physically.

A drop of gin fell from his glass and landed squarely on Tony’s cheek. Steve reached down to rub it off just as Tony’s hand raised to do the same—Tony’s delayed reflexes meant that his hand landed squarely on top of Steve’s.

“Sorry,” Steve stammered, moving to pull his hand away. Tony’s hand gripped his, then relaxed as he pushed Steve’s hand to cup his cheek. Tony’s eyes were closed, his lashes thick and dark against his skin. Steve tried to focus on breathing.

Tony’s head turned, his lips ghosting over Steve’s wrist. Steve shuddered, then, suddenly, Tony turned his head away and he let go of Steve’s hand.

Alarm bells were going off his Steve’s brain, and he suddenly wished he wasn’t this many glasses of gin in. All he wanted was to have Tony’s lips pressed against his wrist again. All he wanted was to have Tony’s lips pressed against his anywhere, and Oh my god.

Steve brought his hand back up to Tony’s hair in an attempt to bring things back to how casual they were minutes ago. Except, Tony shifted away and sat up. Steve downed his drink and belatedly noticed that Tony was seated right beside him, their legs touching.

They were quiet.

Tony swirled his glass before drinking. Steve reached out and held Tony’s wrist, not knowing anything other than the fact that his body ached for Tony’s warmth, anywhere, everywhere, now.

Tony looked up at him, and they stared at each other for a long moment, and Steve wasn’t imagining it, the space between them was closing—he could see how pink Tony’s lips were, the light dusting of stubble on his cheek. Steve licked his lips and saw Tony’s gaze track the movement.

Steve’s phone rang, and Tony slid away as Steve jumped up to find it.

The alarm signaling midnight continued to ring as Steve turned and watched as Tony left his office, laptop in hand. Steve squeezed his eyes shut in frustration.

*

Steve stepped out of the car and was overwhelmed by a wall of sound: Camera shutters clicking, reporters hounding around him with questions. He flashed a smile and began walking to the polling center as Tony trailed behind him, greeting the media as he went.

Tony placed a hand on the small of Steve’s back, guiding him forward unnecessarily. Still, Steve was thankful for the gesture. He was nervous. They all were.

Steve had sent a message to the team the night before, thanking them for their work. Of course, this was after they’d all received a final report from Nick—Steve’s numbers were better, sure, but not good enough. Steve was sure Tony and the team had spoken about it, without him. All Steve got was the report.

Once inside, Steve turned to the team: it didn’t have to be said that they’d all go together. He nodded at them. “Here we go.”

Tony reached out for a hug. For a moment, everything was silent. Tony turned up to look at Steve and pecked him on the cheek. “For good luck,” he said with a small smile.

“All I have to do is make sure I don’t tick the wrong name on the ballot,” Steve said with a laugh, pulling away to turn to the booth. He let out a small puff of breath and went in.

It felt surreal, seeing his name on the ballot, right beside Pierce’s. After all those months, all the forums, fundraisers, speeches—it had all led up to this. Everything, nothing, and over sooner than he thought it would be; Steve rubbed the space between his eyebrows, overwhelmed.

Tony was next in line, and they stood beside each other as they waited for the rest of the team to vote.

“Did you cry?” Tony whispered in Steve’s ear. Steve let out a small laugh. “Aw, Steve.” Tony said. “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Come on, I’m doing an informal study. First timers, they always cry. Even if only a little,” Tony said, smirking up at Steve.

Steve rolled his eyes fondly. “Maybe.”

Tony’s smirk relaxed into a small smile. Steve felt Tony’s hand brush against his, then, as if having finally decided, Tony’s laced their fingers together. Steve kept his gaze forward, and smiled when Tony’s hand squeezed his before letting go.

Outside the polling station, the media had gathered neatly around a podium. Steve stepped up with Tony and Natasha flanking him.

“Good morning, everyone.” Steve started. “Today is an important day for our city, and for our nation. Today, we get to make a decision that will affect the next four years. We hope that everyone takes this opportunity to exercise their civic duty, and choose wisely.” Steve nodded at the reporters. “Getting to today hasn’t been easy, but nothing ever good is. Meeting with people, listening to their stories of triumph and hardships, has given me an endless supply of reminders as to why we continue to fight. Now, I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but I’ve learned to trust in the people, and to trust in them to make the right decision.”

Steve flashed a smile for the cameras before stepping off the podium.

“Remind me again why we needed to hire Bruce?” Tony asked, taking Steve by the elbow as he led them to the car. Steve snorted. “I can talk. Bruce can write.”

Tony shook his head in response, opening the door for Steve before climbing in after him.

*

Any plans tonight?

Well I was going to punch a bag until I passed out from exhaustion unless you have something better in mind

Want to watch the numbers come in

Not really Wait is that really what you were gonna do tonight

I mean it’s my job

That sounds horrible I’ll bring snacks

*

Tony’s apartment was modern, sleek, and neat.

“How did you find time to clean?” Steve asked as he looked around the room with barely concealed awe.

Tony shrugged in response as he shoved a bag of popcorn into the microwave. “Have a seat. Make yourself at home,” Tony said. Steve turned his head as he read the spines of the books on Tony’s shelves.

“I’m making myself a drink. Do you want one?” A beat. “Of course you want one, what am I saying.” Steve had never seen Tony this underdressed, just wearing an old tank top and sweatpants. Steve watched the muscles in Tony’s arm flex as he mixed their drinks, then let his eyes trail down Tony’s back and—Steve tore his eyes away and went back to looking through Tony’s extensive library.

The polls had closed over two hours ago, and all anyone could do was wait for the results to come in. Everyone had gone home, exhausted from all the on-ground efforts.

Tony had his laptop mirrored on the TV, a slow trickle of numbers coming in. Steve continued to work his way around Tony’s apartment, thankful for the distraction. He felt keyed up and tense, not knowing what to do with the nervous energy thrumming through his veins.

“Does it always feel this way?” Steve asked, as he took a glass from Tony.

“On tenterhooks, every time,” Tony said, sliding open the balcony door and stepping out. Steve followed, and raised Tony’s pack of cigarettes in silent question.

Tony looked confused for a moment, then nodded. Steve placed the cigarette between his lips and leaned over to Tony, who had clicked a lighter to life. Tony motioned to the chair and sat.

Steve sat beside him, their thighs pressed against each other. They were quiet as they sipped their drinks and smoked. Steve had thought about this, more than once: Just being alone with Tony, after that night, after both of those nights when they held each other and let themselves be held. Steve had turned it over and over in his mind, why he felt so comfortable around someone he’d met only barely a year ago, someone who was working with him (never for, Steve hated the idea of having people work for him like he was above them). Steve kept trying to figure out why someone who yelled at him a fair share—and who he’d yelled back at, too, sometimes—was someone he’d warmed towards rather than backed away from. Somehow, somewhere down the line, Steve had found a friend in Tony. But more than that, Steve found himself noticing the way Tony’s hands moved, the way he’d lick his lips after taking a sip of coffee, the way he’d keep touching everyone so casually. It drove Steve up the wall, trying to figure out if it ever meant anything, after those nights, after that time when their faces were so close Steve could feel Tony’s breath—Steve replayed that memory often. Steve thought about how things would’ve been different if he’d just leaned in a bit faster, or reached out to stop Tony from leaving, maybe finally know what it felt like to have Tony’s lips pressed against his. And then, Steve knew. Knew that he’d have to say something, and soon, because it would all be over soon, maybe (hopefully not), but Steve had to say something or else he’d explode.

Tony placed a hand on Steve’s knee and squeezed, jolting Steve out of his thoughts. Steve looked at Tony’s hand, and took a drag off his cigarette, tension beginning to pool in his stomach. Tony smiled at Steve, and Steve felt himself blush.

“Steve,” Tony started, and Steve shrugged off Tony’s hand and stood up, nervous now for different reasons.

“So. Okay, since, you know, we’re done with the campaign,” Steve said, beginning to pace and then stopping himself. “I should be honest.”

“With you,” Steve added, turning to Tony, and then turning away just as quickly. “Because that’s what we always strove for, in this campaign. Honesty. It’s the best policy, if you ask me,” Steve said, taking another drag of his cigarette. He felt a bit wild. He wasn’t sure if his hands were shaking. He was pointedly not looking at Tony.

“Anyway,” Steve said, willing himself to keep going, or else he’d just never speak again, ever. “Here goes, right,” he added. Steve reached over to the table and pulled out another cigarette, lighting it quickly. Tony reached over and lit a new cigarette as well, uncharacteristically quiet, and Steve was both thankful and horrified in equal measure.

“I may have… lied? About the cuddling being normal, I mean it’s not abnormal it’s just, I wanted to do more than cuddle, that one time, actually no, both times, I wanted to kiss you—I want to kiss you, a lot, all over your beautiful damn face, okay, and, there, I. Yeah.” Steve let out a long breath. “See, that’s why we needed to hire Bruce,” he said, and even to his own ears, his laugh sounded panicked.

There was ash on Tony’s pant leg, meaning Tony hadn’t moved his hand, and Tony was staring at him. Steve touched the back of his neck, scratched a bit at the skin there, not really knowing what to do with his hands. Tony stood up from the bench and walked up to Steve, placing his hands on Steve’s arms, grounding him.

“You always have to beat me to it, don’t you,” Tony said quietly, as if more to himself than to Steve. Steve breathed. Tony looked up at him, a small smile on his lips. “Well are you going to kiss me or what, Rogers?”

Steve smiled so hard it was as if his face would break. Then he bent down and pressed his lips gently against Tony’s.

Tony nipped at his bottom lip and Steve felt his brain short circuit at the touch, then kiss got messy, their mouths barely separating and only for them to gasp in breaths before kissing again, greedy with want.

Steve ran his hands down the length of Tony’s back as Tony wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck, pulling them together closer. Tony let out a small, needy noise and Steve shuddered, needing more, needing absolutely everything.

Tony began moving them backwards into his apartment, dragging Steve expertly through his living room, their kiss breaking only briefly when Steve bumped into Tony’s coffee table.

Steve let out a low growl of frustration, and then hoisted Tony up against his hips.

“Oh Jesus,” Tony moaned, bending down to kiss Steve hungrily. Steve could feel Tony’s hardness pressing against his stomach, and a short burst of arousal zipped around his body as he walked towards Tony’s room.

They fell on Tony’s bed and laughed at how the sudden shift pushed the air out of them. Then Tony pushed Steve down onto the bed and began kissing down his neck, letting out a soft string of confessions and obscenities. “I can’t fucking believe,” Tony mumbled as he began unbuttoning Steve’s shirt. Steve’s hands were on Tony’s waist, and he ground up against Tony, desperate for friction.

Steve trailed his hand up Tony’s torso, stopping to pinch a nipple. Tony moaned into Steve’s chest, where he’d been trailing kisses as he unbuttoned Steve’s shirt. Steve pushed him away gently and tugged at Tony’s shirt, his cock straining even harder against his jeans now that Tony was shirtless. “Fuck,” Steve said reverently.

Tony smiled down at him and unfastened the last button, hands skating across Steve’s bare stomach. Steve sat up and kissed Tony again, his hands against Tony’s chest then moving out to grip his arms, then down to Tony’s hips, pushing Tony’s ass down. Tony’s hands moved to Steve’s fly, and he pulled away.

“Is this okay?” He asked.

Steve suddenly registered how Tony looked, eyes wide, lips pink from being kissed, perfectly coiffed hair now askew. Steve did that. He wanted to do more. Steve nodded enthusiastically, not trusting his voice from cracking.

Tony pulled Steve’s jeans and boxer briefs off before taking the opportunity to shuck off his sweats. Steve licked his lips as he surveyed Tony’s naked form, and then realized Tony was doing the same. Steve felt himself blush at the attention, before he leaned over and pulled Tony back on top of him, kissing him again, and again, and again, his skin on fire in every point of contact.

Steve flipped Tony onto his back easily. “I’m going to suck you off now,” he said, with probably more resolve than necessary. “I’m in heaven, aren’t I,” Tony groaned. Steve licked a small bead of precum off the top of Tony’s cock, reveling at the taste. Then, he took all of Tony’s cock in his mouth in one swift go, which elicited a strangled moan from Tony as he dragged his mouth back up and let Tony’s cock fall out of his mouth with a soft pop. “Now you are,” Steve said, grinning up at Tony, who had pushed himself up and was watching Steve, a look of wonder spread plainly on his face. Steve bent back down and continued to lick and suck Tony’s cock, his own arousal making him grind against the bed, fireworks going off in his brain when Tony reached down and tangled his fingers in Steve’s hair, pulling and pushing along with Steve’s rhythm. “Please, please, please,” Tony moaned.

After a few moments, Tony pushed at Steve’s shoulder: “Mhn,” Tony said, eloquently. “Stop or I’m gonna—“ Steve wrapped his hand around the base of Tony’s cock and kissed the head sweetly. “Oh god, Steve, Steve,” Tony blathered, his hand moving from Steve’s shoulder and to the base of Steve’s skull. “Steve, please,” Tony moaned.

“Can I fuck you?” Steve asked, his hand rubbing up and down Tony’s thigh.

“What the fuck do you think I’ve been asking for?” Tony hissed, falling back onto the bed in frustration, then Tony turned away to dig through his drawer.

Steve huffed out a small laugh, and kissed Tony’s hand when he was handed a small bottle of lube. Steve coaxed Tony’s knees up and kissed down his thigh as he spread some lube on his fingers.

Steve pressed his finger gently against Tony’s hole, and Tony groaned at the touch. “Come on,” he pleaded.

Steve kissed the inside of Tony’s thigh as he pushed his finger in, curling it slowly. “That okay?” He murmured into Tony’s skin. Tony’s reached out and squeezed Steve’s shoulder, impatient: “More.” Steve pushed another finger in and licked a stripe of spit up Tony’s cock. “Oh, fuck, oh fuck,” Tony moaned, “more, please, faster.”

Steve began to suck Tony’s cock as he slowly slid another finger in, continuing to work Tony open. Tony buried his hands in Steve’s hair again, Steve’s hand on Tony’s hip stopping him from completely fucking Steve’s mouth.

“Fuck me.” Tony’s voice was barely above a whisper. Steve stuttered up, his body tight with arousal. “Please, Steve,” Tony added, his hand cupping Steve’s jaw, fingers soft against the base of Steve’s neck.

Steve crawled up against Tony, pressing kisses along his chest. Steve spent a few moments to kiss and bite Tony’s nipple, only for Tony to let out an impatient huff of breath, drawing a leg up and around Steve to pull him closer.

Steve bent down and kissed Tony, smiling down at him as he pushed his cock in. They moaned at the same time, Steve screwing his eyes shut. Tony felt perfect. This was perfect. Steve continued to ease himself in, and Tony’s hands alternated between clawing at the sheets and raking fingers down his back, chanting Steve’s name all along.

“You feel so fucking good,” Steve ground out, fully inside Tony now, stopping his movements to let Tony adjust. “Fuuuuuuuck,” Tony mewled, his hands pawing uselessly at Steve’s chest, his fingernails leaving red lines in their wake.

Then Steve started fucking him in earnest, hot and wild and pressing open mouthed kisses anywhere he could reach Tony. Tony raised his hand to touch Steve’s cheek, and Steve turned his head and sucked in two of Tony’s fingers in his mouth, desire pooling heavy in his belly. He reached between them and gripped Tony’s cock, and Tony let out a choked sound: “Steve, fuck, I’m—I’m going to.” Tony came on Steve’s hand, coating their stomachs with his cum.

Steve eased back, but Tony gripped his hips quickly. “Keep going,” he said, smiling up at Steve, completely blissed out. Steve continued to move, and then Tony reached up and tweaked Steve’s nipple and Steve saw stars.

He collapsed beside Tony, breathing hard. Tony reached over and rubbed Steve’s chest. Steve picked up Tony’s hand and raised it to his lips. “You’re unbelievable,” Tony said, laughing a little. “I knew you’d be a sap. But not this much of a sap.”

Steve shrugged, continuing to dot Tony’s hand with little kisses, eventually moving up to his wrist, then forearm. “Can’t help it.”

Tony hummed in response, then eventually got up. He came back with a wet towel and rubbed them down, Steve still lying limp on the bed. “That really happened,” he said, brain to mouth filter completely gone. “Yeah,” Tony said, smiling at him, sharing the disbelief. Steve leaned up to kiss him.

Then, outside, both their phones started to ring. They startled out of their kiss and ran outside, both of them picking up their phones.

“Nick?”

“Are you seeing the numbers?” Nick asked levelly. Meanwhile, Steve could hear the high-pitched screeching emanating from Tony’s phone. Steve and Tony turned to the laptop, and Tony watched as he refreshed the screen, and then refreshed it again.

“Oh my god,” they said, finally making sense of the numbers displayed on the screen.

*

Steve stood in front of the media, silently going through the talk points Bruce had rushed last night. Behind him, he could feel Tony shifting from foot to foot, mirroring the frazzled energy coursing it’s way through Steve’s body.

“Good morning, everyone,” he started. “Today we celebrate successful elections, the indicator of people’s choice in the democratic process. This win is not and will never be solely mine; today, we stand here with the people’s trust and expectations on our shoulders, and we will remain eternally grateful for this opportunity to serve.”

Steve flashed a smile for the cameras, then moved down to begin shaking hands with the reporters, many of whom he’d eventually become friends with.

“Mr. Rogers,” Steve nodded at the reporter who had essentially outed him to the world. “John,” Steve said offering his hand. John, the reporter, took it gratefully. Behind him, Steve noticed Tony making a face.

“It was only polite,” Steve said to Tony, after extricating himself from small talk with the reporter.

“And I’m proud of you, as your campaign manager. As your friend, I’ve harbored some less than charitable thoughts,” Tony answered, picking a bit of lint off Steve’s jacket.

Steve smiled at Tony, taking his hand and threading their fingers together. “That’s okay. I’m charitable enough for the both of us,” Steve said, giving Tony’s hand a squeeze before letting go.

“That’s debatable,” Tony said promptly. Steve snorted in response, and then stopped when Tony’s words had sunk in.

“As my friend?” He asked.

Tony looked up at him from his phone. “What?”

Steve furrowed his brow. “Tony Stark,” he said, unconsciously jutting his chin out, readying for an argument. “I would like to be more than your friend, eventually. Would you like to get dinner with me tonight?”

Tony furrowed his brow and shook his head, confused and a little peeved. “Tonight is your celebratory dinner with the team and funders,” he said.

“Tomorrow, then.” Steve said, not giving an inch.

Tony let out an exasperated sigh, “no, tomorrow you’ve got—” Steve let out a puff of breath and pulled Tony close, pressing his lips against Tony’s and then quickly pulling away.

“Steve,” Tony growled low. Around them, the room was silent.

Steve smiled serenely down at Tony. “I think as my chief of staff you’ll find some way to prioritize my personal time.”

Tony’s jaw clicked shut, then he let out a burst of laughter. “Congratulations to you too, Steve,” Tony said, projecting his voice to ensure that everyone in the room could hear. “I’ve always loved how affectionate you are,” he added, clapping his hand against Steve’s back in a move designed to look Strictly Friendly. He pulled Steve into a half hug and whispered, “I’m going to make you pay for this.” Tony’s breath against Steve’s ear sent a spike of electricity down Steve’s spine.

“Pretty sure I’m just asking you to do exactly what I pay you for,” Steve whispered back, and pulled away, starting small talk with the media as if nothing had happened. He didn’t want to make Tony’s job any harder than he’d already had. At least for now.

Besides, he had a date to plan.

[thecozycryptid]

Another year and a whole lotta improvement! 

I wasn’t on tumblr for the entire first half of this year but if y’all want I’ll post the first & second half of the year as masterposts so that you can enjoy viewing the full pictures! 

Talk about me being a fandom-hopper, I’ve had a whole variety of fandoms and new faves this year more than ever! It’s been very fun in that respect. Here’s an anthology summery in a little more detail including links to the original pieces:

(P.S. Like my artwork & hard work? Please consider reblogging so that other people can enjoy my work to! <3)

@artlessictoan @big-tongue-slime-bf @godamn-clown-headcanons  @clumsybookworm18 @doctorcarlislecullen @notaliteraltoad

Jan: I finished 2017 with a finished collaboration for the Kingsman Flash Bang with the AMAZING @elletromil. Together we created a gritty modern-fantasy AU called ‘Taking Flight’, she wrote an ABSOLUTELY STUNNING story and I illustrated a cover and a playlist (which i still love and worked incredibly hard on!)

Feb: I became invested in the anime The Ancient Magus Bride, I wasn’t keen on the main story but I loved the attention to British folklaw, a lot of which is usually forgotten in most fantasy-type settings and the fact that it went from sweet domestic family stuff to an unsettling horror story in 0.05 seconds. I also really liked Chise & Ruths sibling relationship and cried when Ruth became her familiar.

Mar: i.e. the month i realised that the MCU is actually pretty good and got swept up in my love for marvel once again after years, also I loved drawing Bucky & Hyenas and that combo gave me LIFE.

April: I started making a Stucky-centred MCU Merfolk AU called ‘There’s Blood In The Water’, I’m still writing it and idk if I’ll ever post it but honestly I think it’s some of the best writing I’ve done in a little while aside from one fic. My AMAZINGLY ACCURATE MCU ‘College For Dummies’ AU which I completed in THREE DAYS in the same month, based on real experiences of me and my irl friends, its a comedic-slice-of-college-life fic that still remains my favourite writing piece I’ve done to this day.

May: That Month I Binge Watched The Alienist And Made A Modern AU Lovingly Called ‘Bratwurst, Pizza and Chinese Food’ which I still ADORE and am eagerly awaiting the 2nd series so I can revamp it again because GOD i love Laszlo, John and Sara SO M U C H still.

June: For a challenge on my old Marvel Animo I made a Steve/Bucky/Peggy AU called ‘Bucky Barns’ Day Off’ based on Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (one of my fav movies ever tbh), I organised the entire cast with MCU characters from CA:TFA and made a few moodboards and scene redraws. It’s only a one-off AU but its still GREAT omG.

July: I FINALLY watched X-Men: Apocalypse, delve into my never ending love for the X-Men, binged my childhood (X-Men: Evolution) and fell in love with the garbage stink goblin that is Toad. 

Aug: Nightcrawler has always been my fav but Toad has honestly become one of my faves I’m gonna carry with me for a looong long time, what a terrible british disaster meme.

Sept: I was still heavily into X-Men (and will always be tbh) but I did a collab with someone over on Marvel Amino, my half of the trade being with Falcon and Redwing. I’m still v proud of the lineless art I did!

Oct: I watched Venom and thrived in the monsterous, friendly, supportive fandom who stuck by me even when my main artwork for it was a shapeshifting companions AU! I actually made a LOT of content in October but I don’t have anything I like enough to feature it in this summery!

Nov: In addition to making a Fix-It Dora and The Blue Symbiote (which i lovingly dubbed as Fester) Survives AU which a lot of y’all love, I also stumbled back into Twilight of all fandoms and made some good rarepair content. It’s chill though, we’re all kicking SMeyer’s Ass, making HILARIOUS memes and huge on supporting lgbt folks!

Dec: I’m head-over-heels in love with Rohemian Rhapsody (though I don’t make anything for it), X-Men, Venom, am eagerly awaiting to see Into The Spider-Verse (which a adore already) and have a terribly wonderful Spidersona! :D 

That’s all folks!

[jkrawling]

25-May-2019 viewer, Greg Simcock here. Author J. K. Rawling if you want to know the author’s pseudonym, but you were never given the opportunity to get to know me for my art and design drawings or stories, inventions and tunes. The theft of my work has seemingly followed my activities over many years and so I feel I am rewarded in as much as God has been since the Heaven's and Earth turned in time. Nobody really knows for sure how the universe was formed and no one will ever know. It is a long-standing mystery, so great in dimension, that only the broadminded persons alive can understand its well-established geophysical existence in what is simply an infinite voluminous void called space, but if it didn’t exist, you wouldn’t be able to read this message now. So that is why the lord God was invented by man. God was the answer to the questions so many people never gave much thought to. You see if there was no God people could not think of a better reason that would explain their existence. The stories in the bible are indeed written by people exploring the existence of God as they sorta purposeful answer to their nagging question: Who created the world, with all its splendours?, and; How did man originate from nothing?“ In order to reveal that information, I would have to take one back in time to when the universe began to form. From there it would evolve, eventually becoming the God-forsaken place people are prepared to believe was created by one being. Let me explain. God is an invention of man that only stands to let people imagine well enough that there is a logical answer as to why such a thing exists. It isn’t something taught in schools. There would be no need to query anyone for the real answer of why we live, eat and breathe, if any one person could provide the unequivocal answer to that finite question without disagreeing by anyone, so God was invented to allow people to recognize there is a reason for mankind and every other living thing in the world, be it on planet Earth or somewhere in the universe. That brings me to thinking about why I am an individual who is one of the creators who has, for many years, developed a mindset of knowledge so vast that I have found nobody to believe in what I know to be true. I believe my mind to be a sponge for knowledge. I was a curious boy from the time when I was a baby, sucking on my mother’s breast nipples, which I remember vaguely doing on occasion, and looking at the stars, wondering where the planets and galaxies I heard about were in the night's sky. From an early age, I was imagining how the features where I lived would appear from the sky, where birds appeared to fly as they flew by. I began to draw things from an early age the things I imagined, such as creatures that lived in the sea, boats, cars and girls I liked. I became creative in my way of thinking and drew numerous mechanical things, such as planes, trains, tractors. I pulled apart many items, whether they needed fixing or not (that rarely went back together or worked again) and from doing that I developed an inventive mind. In 1978 I joined the Australian Army to hopefully get a job that I could build a career of. I scored the position of a cinema projectionist (ECN-320) and entertained hundreds of thousands of soldiers, screening motion pictures made for cinemas in the motion picture industry. I served nine years, mostly with the rank of Corporal, until 1987 when I had to resign after sustaining a lower-back injury. That was a two-edged sword for me. For one thing led to another and while I was out of paid employment, I worked long days, well into the nights, for about 9 years, designing things, drawing many characters, and creating hundreds of stories with the range of characters, creatures, and machines I drew for use in designing my projects. Nothing I drew went to waste. From fishing reels I drew, I created vehicle designs and a range of characters. From a computer mouse and a cleaning tool for the mouse tracking rollers inside the mouse, I created more characters. Drawings that failed to meet my needs became unusual characters of things. One drawing of a wobble-head lion car-dash ornament, which I was creating drawings for to become a product I could sell, was ruined from excessive lines I drew on its neck. I simply drew the lined thick around the neck and had what appeared as a three-headed guard dog. As it was an unusual drawing, I put it in my story file, eventually adding it to my stories of a wizard boy I saw myself as. I had served nine years screening to people of all age groups, including children from preschool, juniors, teens and adults. I loved my work and play while in the Army, as well as after being left on my own to recover from my emotional time of seven years afterwards. When the designs of my stories and inventions were all well developed, with many of them showing good prospects to become a breadwinner for me and my needs to settle with a desire to raise a family after my work on creating things was done, but that didn’t go to plan. I was robbed of my work over many years. The Harry Potter story developed into five stories, with two extra titles and the ending scene drawings made, which was showing the clash between Lord Voldemort and Me as Harry Potter. I was robbed of my work and the families I had grown to love and imagine were my own family members. I cried many nights after accepting my work of hundreds of stories and inventions had gotten stolen. I could not raise anyone’s attention when I spoke of my lost drawings, many technical design drawings, songs, tunes and animations. All with names of the main characters and titles for the programs I had tirelessly built up from my creative mind and the activities I had been accustomed to doing over the years I was actively pursuing my goals. All I had left was time, so, after my tears dried, I began sitting and thinking, staring into nothingness, as I tried to fathom what had happened to my artwork for such a lot of projects. I had been seeing things come onto the market and wondering how someone else had thought of the same thing as I had designed, but my mind would not let me think about those things and the reason they had managed to become products on sale in shops. Eventually, my mental flashbacks of things I had designed and seen on sale, or in motion pictures, began to bother me, so I began to draw what I could remember of something that had flashed a mental image that caused me to wonder why that had happened. Although I cannot remember how long those flashbacks occurred, I eventually had drawn enough segments of some inventions one designed that I was able to redraw them. Only then was I able to realise my mind had been alert enough to recognise things I had drawn and after my loss, it was all the while on the watch for to help me remember designing things I chanced to see with the mind's eye. One night, I wanted to see a children's program but it was being broadcast in the early morning hours, so I set the video recorder to record the program as I slept. When I viewed the program in the morning, I was shocked to hear the theme tune and song for Thomas The Tank Engine. I had created the song lyrics and tune for Thomas The Tank Engine. The engine was drawn using an un-needed drawing of a caster-ring fishing-reel I designed and patented. I drew my initials in the circle at the front of the engine's boiler so as to give it what became the characteristic face of Thomas. I was delighted when I first created it, thinking it to be a really useful little engine for use in my children’s story about a tank engine. Even the program was based on my setting for the screen animation I had hoped my work would be used to make for children. Drawings of the mouse cleaner were made into characters for other animations. One I named Boom And Reds, their Boom was a messed up drawing, creating the monster named Boom, and Reds was curved lines from a drawing of my mouse cleaning tool design. When a man named Alan Page asked me about the characters, I told him it was a children’s animation in which the characters would move along and hide under their curved hat. The monster thought he was useless, so the Reds characters befriended the monster (Boom) and made him feel happy by playing a game with the Reds. Flamo has no hands, but I drew my initials in a stylized way to save me having to draw hands and to code my drawing.Sam Sam was named after an uncle who had died. Master Raindrop was named after I had observed raindrops running along a rope I had tied between two veranda posts. I was amused by the energy in the raindrops running back and forth, so I went into my loungeroom and drew the raindrop on my design page of a project. The character eventually got drawn from that downpour of rain. Alan Page showed an interest in what I had drawn and asked me why I had drawn it, so I told him about the rain running along, back and forth, under the rope. He then asked me if he could have the rope. I allowed him to have that rope, as I had the memory of the actions of the raindrops and the character drawing, so I created the programs story-board for what I named Master Raindrop. Alan Page asked me many questions about other characters, stories, drawings and program ideas they were in, all set in sections of my design files and story-board files. That includes numerous drawings and theme elements in the story-boarded stories of my Harry Potter series. My writer's name is J. K. Rawling. I created that pseudonym after I had created the story-boards for my story I named The Lion King. My third story I named Finding NEMO. Up to 2009, I had given a police officer, named James Langley, six compact disks (CD’s) of notes and images of things I had discovered on sale to do with my projects work. In that year, he got promoted to Sergeant and was posted to Fremantle, Western Australia. The Rockingham police did not assist me in any way, but from then on I simply wrote notes and became lost in this mad, uncaring world I was living in much as a hermit may live. Recently, I found an early notebook of 2009 with some of my drawings in it I had drawn to remind me of characters and programs I had designed to be made. They are not as tidy as my original artwork would have shown, but, since that is not at hand, I post a number of photocopied pages with drawings of some of my characters from my notebook for your perusal. I have mentioned only several of my stories and some characters but the majority of my characters, inventions and stories remain to be discovered.They formed story-boards for productions such as Jurassic Park, Spiderman, Batman - The Dark Knight, Avatar, Terminator, True Lies, and many more titles. Posted 3 minutes ago Tagged: j. k. Rawling, jk rowling, jk rowling, boom and reds, Thomas the tank engine, master raindrop, flame, the dark knight, avatar, the lion king, finding Nemo, the plagiarist.

[juliastartoons]

Nomad of Nowhere: Eagle Canyon Live-Blog:

Hey y’all! Since I’m not a Rooster Teeth first member, I can’t watch the series at the same pace the rest of you do, but! I’m still excited about it !! So I thought, what’s the harm in doing a live-blog of episode 7 before I do some scene redraws and whatnot!

I’m posting it down below so you can skip if you want, and if you’re on mobile, well, just scroll really fast or something. I dunno.

- Toth seems...Actually pretty nervous here. She’s generally hard to read, given that she’s usually either “angry” or “not angry,” but she does definitely seem worried here, which makes sense given where we saw her last time.

- Unfortunately, Don Paragon, same.

- God how did this twink get into power in the first place.

- Was probably born into it. Figures.

- To be honest, I love the rest of the Dandy-Lions. It feels like they’re in “The Office” or “Parks and Rec” while everybody else is in this high-stakes fantasy adventure. They’re just living their best life.

- Okay, I just remembered that Don Paragon founded the Oasis, which is why he has power, but still. Still.

- Gross, Red Manuel’s here. I remembered that at one point I referred to him as a ketchup bottle-looking brat in a fic and it still fits. So Well.

- For once, Don Paragon made an actually good decision.

- What a catch. I love Toth so much.

- even in the fictional land of the oasis....capitalism...still reigns...

- Wow. I can’t believe Don Paragon’s a furry.

- I can’t believe Don Paragon wants to be his fursona.

- Okay, but, I just love how he sounds like he’s on the verge of an aneurism. Like, same.

- PROZD!!!

- ProZD, thank you for calling out this man for being the twink he actually is.

- God, what is up with Don Paragon trying to sell his business to everyone who walks through the door?

- Also: killer-seum? That might be Relevant later.

- I don’t have anything to say here. Governor Toro is just so casual about everything. What does he have to worry about? Nothing. What a way to live.

- THANK YOU PROZD FOR SAYING WHAT NEEDS TO BE SAID. “How has no one beaten you to death and taken your place.”

- A body-count less than 30? How elitist.

- YIKES DON PARAGON I HATE YOU BUT YOU GOTTA COMMIT.

- Also: unrelated: where is my daughter. Where’s Skout.

- “God, you’re weird.” God is canon.

- Unrelated still, but, I love Toth.

- SKOUT!!! SHE’S HERE!! Still mortally wounded, but HERE!!!

- Oh yikes never mind. On one hand, I understand Toth has a lot riding on this deal with Don Paragon to save her people, and Skout getting wounded threw her off the path of that because she cares dearly about her friend, so it makes sense for her to be a bit harsh, but at the same time, I spent so much time characterizing soft Toth for what??

- But still, aww, poor baby.

- Here comes the Nomad!

- HE’S HERE!!

- I guess they call it “Eagle Canyon” for a reason.

- Aww, poor baby. Poor bird.

- Everything’s a baby if I say it is.

- Weird glowing nonsense, all right, all right.

- Oh no!! The egg! I am actually worried!!

- Cliff-hanger. Hanging from a cliff.

- I like the fact that one of the Dandy-Lions signaled Toth, which implies that they are actually pretty loyal to her, when it could’ve been so much easier just to shoot the arrow and bring the Nomad down then.

- How Toth inspires this loyalty however, that’s hard to guess. Probably fear? Or actual good leadership? Either or. Either way, Red Manuel doesn’t seem to stand for it.

- Mama bird shares the kindness. Her debt has been repaid.

- Yikes, Toth. I love you and all, but that is some timing.

- I like how she’s using this time to actually be dramatic and he genuinely has no clue what she’s doing or how long she’s been searching for him.

- I love how he’s just letting her do her monologue like, yeah, she’s earned it, but at the same time is still more worried about the egg than what she has to say.

- Oh, now she has his attention.

- I have no idea who Toth’s voice actress is, but she’s killing it with the “stoic badass with a chip on her shoulder” role.

- Oh no, he looks so sad. He’s worried about Skout?

- I love his imitation of Skout.

- I also like how Toth isn’t actually trying to be violent here, sure, she has the axe for intimidation, but she’s more or less verbally leveling with the Nomad to make her come with him. Was this always going to be her strategy, or did she figure that she needed a new one after some other incidents?

- I love the disbelief in her voice when she says “Skout?” 

- Oh wow, I guess that was kind of answered, Toth really cares about Skout, but that does imply a conversation would still be happening.

- “No fights, no tricks...” Does this mean she was trying to be genuine? Is she really at the end of her rope here? Is this rock-bottom for her?

- Also he just JUMPED off that cliff saying he’d be back??? What??? 

- I love her so much.

- Well, so much for that talk, Toth.

- He’s so tiny, or is Toth just really tall??

- She stopped her axe! She was going to hit the egg/nomad, but she stopped the axe!!

 - Toth’s really been having a day, huh.

- I legitimately laughed when she punched him in the face. I love you Nomad, but just the sheer annoyance she must be feeling just makes it hilarious.

- She’s mean but unfortunately, I love her.

- Was Toth actually going to have a fist-fight with that giant bird.

- Skout!!

- Whoa, Toth seems...Amazed/concerned? I dunno. It’s hard reading her. I already have a hard enough time reading people.

- Nope, definitely mad.

- Please don’t actually drop the egg.

- “Ohh, curse my tender heart!”

- Dang it Nomad!! But also, dang it mama bird for almost knocking Skout off a cliff.

- “I would throw almost anything over that cliff to get the job done.” “You didn’t throw me over...”

- Oh no! They’re actually fighting! This was like, the last thing I wanted to happen!!

- Toth, you’re going to make your girlfriend cry.

- SHE IS ACTUALLY CRYING NOO

- “I guess I was mistaken..” What did Skout think they were before, though? Friends? Partners? She never really put a word on it.

- I’m really actually sad about this, but at the same time, the miracle of life, I guess?

Conclusion: I love Toth, but I really hope she and Skout make up soon because I am legitimately sad about this, good on the Nomad for escaping again, I guess, and I want somebody in-universe to call Don Paragon a twink, but at the same time I don’t want to think about if this slang is actually a thing in this universe and I don’t actually want to know.

[sleepymarmot]

A couple of months ago, after finishing COUNTER/Weight, I spent about a week in a total hangover, relistening to scenes and having feelings. I took some notes, but procrastinated posting them, and then finally got distracted. But, a) I hate leaving things I intended for tumblr unposted, even if they have value only for me, and b) I also hate posting things out of order, and there's a big TM liveblog incoming. So, here's a bunch of really random thoughts about C/w from past me.

The gnosis virus did go nowhere huh. I was hopeful for a minute when one of the finale intros mentioned it, but that was it. What was the purpose of that arc even. [Note from present me: Lol. At least I feel better about this one!]

Oh, and the patch AuDy left never reappeared either. And the idea from the faction game that Aria's images owned by EarthHome/Petrichor transmit Rigour code… That's the flip side of the coin. On the one hand, it's really cool to see the creative process – on the other, it sometimes feels like you're listening to people write a script for the tv show, but only get to see a half of the finished product. It's fascinating to see the universe grow organically and the players to come up with new ideas and get excited about them – but that means numerous retcons, some of them not even presented as such, because the creators forgot what the previous revision was or didn't thought it was important. It's a unique feature of the medium that player choice directs the narrative and it's not bound by railroading – but that means some roads lead nowhere, and some branches dry and fall off.

It's a bit harder to make peace with something that could have easily been developed more within the existing plot of the show. How come there's a player character whose consciousness consists of three different people in various combinations, but nobody seems to be curious how that works? No PC or NPC ever asked “Which one of you is speaking right now?” or something. The final episodes made a lot of things clearer, but it still felt too little, too late. Hard not to be reminded of that gripe about certain two characters sharing one character sheet one of whom was left underdeveloped and half-forgotten… Both are very ambitious concepts that require a double amount of work from the player, so I feel bad complaining they weren't realized to full potential, but…

Speaking of L&D… I still want to know how the hell did that one engineer all by herself design 4 gods, one of which became a basis for technology that was advanced even for the civilizations 80,000 years later? This woman singlehandedly surpassed any technological achievement of humanity before and after. Who Is She

I saw a “Wake me up: before you go go / when september ends / wake me up inside” meme and thought “heh, this sounds relevant, which member of the Chime is which?” and it already made me sad, but then I realized that I'd never actually heard the september song and looked it up and. The lyrics fit so well. What the fuck. It's an old song everyone keeps joking about. Why is it appropriate for a legitimate fanmix. What. I guess the word “September” will never be the same again for me.

I looked up the rules for Firebrands, the game used for the finale. Oh my, challenges for the dance minigame are so overtly romantic when you see them in a list together! Imagine this cast of characters having to answer to “do you place your hand upon my elbow, shoulder, waist, or hip?” lmao. Also I didn't realize “May I?” was part of the rules for “stealing time together”. (And I found out there's a party version of that minigame with bug-themed challenges. I might have dug too deep…) "Tactical skirmish" is a really fascinating concept, I've never seen such a masochistic combat system! Really faces the player with the violence they're inflicting: sure, you can always fight on, but are you ready to live with what you'll have to do? But for it to work fully, you need a lot of non-expendable NPCs on both sides. The one with the most likeable team wins! (Like Mako did.)

I'm relistening to Three Conversations and it's pretty interesting that Ibex has a bunch perfectly lifelike android bodies, right? There is no such technology seen anywhere else. Did Righteousness develop and privatize that? Are they so complex that only a Divine would have enough computing power to successfully mimic organic life? Can Aria convince Righteousness to help her perform on stage without leaving her duties? Also, like with AuDy, I wonder how Ibex & Righteousness' consciousness works. Is it a single mind, spread across every body he has, or even anything Righteousness is running on, having a bunch of different conversations at once if he needs to? Or is the original Ibex just gone, and what's left is a personality imprint hanging on to the connection to his still living body, imitating his former self like the automated recording Cass saw wore his face? In other words, has Ibex completely fused with Righteousness, or assimilated and destroyed by it? Does he not exist anymore as an independent singular being, or does he not exist at all? Most info indicates the former, but there was also “You’re not in there anymore” “No”.

If Orth and Jace are anime fans with their Kingdom Come and Panther, then Ibex is the guy who's way too into dinosaurs or paleontology. It's as if the heads of various confessions were called Triceratops, Stegosaurus etc. and only one of them knows wtf that means, and also he compares his Divine to… Were there scavenging dinosaurs? I'm looking at an article that suggests T. Rex might have been a scavenger, so yeah he would compare Righteousness to a goddamn T. Rex.

Hey what do you think is the most thematically aproppriate part of the Hieron anime for Orth to watch alone at night during the Kingdom game. What's the best thematic parallel for when he turns off the episode and thinks he made a mistake. Do you think that he once, after a long day and a long month and maybe a long year of feeling helpless and doomed, sits down for a distraction but ends up sobbing “How could they let this happen to Mother Glory”

On Joypark, there are definitely statues of Eidolons, ancient and holy, that were repainted and repurposed as Hieron deities. Imagine a giant Greek or Roman style marble statue of Apote – and it’s painted over as Samot, with an anime face and in really bright plain colors like these “reconstructions of original coloring” that actually only use base colors so they look like cheap action figures.

I was reading Austin's top ten games of 2016 list on Waypoint and he gave first place to The Sprawl! Aww!

The Downloads folder in my phone gallery is funny bc it mostly consists of every freely available f@tt map and also that one photo of Tristan Walker (because I tried to redraw it, very unsuccessfully). I go check a map and every time am met by Ibex just. staring at me. It's unsettling

Some of the many options for how Apostolosian gender could have been presented:

Apostolosians prefer to be addressed by the most neutral available human pronoun, represented as "they" in English, because the human languages don't have anything close enough

Apostolosian pronouns are represented in English by a set of real-life common pronouns and neopronouns

There's a list of Apostolosian pronouns and they're just used in English verbatim (Really impractical because the players need a cheat sheet, but the most fair)

Humans apply human genders to Apostolosians. Apostolosians may be offended, may find it convenient, or something else

As Austin said in the post-mortem, the Eidolon system is not gender. It's represented in English by titles/honorifics/etc

Any of the above, and the creators are aware of the difference between personal pronouns, grammatical gender, and social gender

And that’s not even touching the core problem of what the concept of gender in a futuristic, techonologically advanced society would look like. Yes, I'm complaining about this for the third time but I'm just. So tired of native English speakers' takes on gendered language. They could have made Apostolosian gender look like anything and they made it look like that fucking mess... God, I really hope TM is good enough to make me forget and forgive the experience of listening to “he... sorry, they” for 100 hours. [Note from present me: Well… mostly]

Here’s my take on this: eidolons in Apostolosian language are absurdly broad noun classes with associated classifiers (which fits both the idea that they’re gender but not actually, and that each of them is a patron to several unrelated aspects of life) Apostolosian: the word “(Apo)thesa” is used to refer to people who follow the corresponding eidolon, as well as for counting buildings, heavy machinery, military units, specific strategies and tactics, log entries, historical documents and chronicles, history textbooks and monographs, and eras :) Human: what the fuck

Very critical, imaginative worldbuilding in which 80,000+ years into the future humanity somehow has 21st century gender and 21st century capitalism! TBH, I find any sci-fi set in the far future inherently silly – we can’t really imagine the future technogy and its effect on society. But it feels like C/w barely even tried, and to hear it boast about “critical worldbuilding” is kinda strange. I assumed that meant they build the world critically, not that they recreate modern society or some aspect of it and criticize that! It’s just another Star Trek then! And it was already clear right during the setup when they said “We don’t want Star Trek aliens” and immediately created Apostolosians.

I haven't seen a single piece of fanart with Taako and Mako. Come on, does nobody want to see these two next to each other! Especially considering the outfits artists like to put Taako in!

I really don't understand how and why people do fandom activities on Twitter and Discord where the creators also have accounts. It gives me so much secondhand embarrassment. I can barely peek at Twitter posts before running away. Old-fashioned opinion apparently but I strongly believe the main fandom space and the interaction-with-original-creators space should be separate. I need a space where I can voice my opinions, especially negative ones, with complete freedom. I need to be able to say exactly what's on my mind. But I wouldn't want any of the people on the podcast to read something unfiltered like my complaints above. Being in the same space as the source content creators obliges any decent person to be diplomatic and constructive. And the creators, in turn, need a space where they don't come across complete randos yelling at them about something they said in a podcast three years ago. I'm already feeling uncomfortable because hearing to strangers pour their hearts out for hundreds of hours gives me way too much insight on who they are as people. Of course, nothing’s stopping them from lurking on Tumblr or AO3 and even reading this very post, but a platform where they have official accounts is still a different thing! I even feel uncomfortable talking about the podcast creators using their first names so much. To my ear, referring to a total stranger by first name, especially if it's a shortened form, sounds so rude! I'm not their friend, I don't have that right! But, of course, writing something like “Mr Walker” in my liveblogs would have been even weirder, nobody does that...

Is it a common experience to not even think about fanfiction after listening to Hieron, but going straight to AO3 after C/w? I feel like since Hieron is still a work in progress, writing/reading about it is stepping on the GM&players' toes, and C/w is finished so it's like they gave us the keys to the playground, it's the fandom's turn now. This story has so much blanks and they must be filled! In one of the early episodes they joked that something cute they said would encourage people to ship Mako/Cass and I was like "Bold of you to assume they aren't already" and, indeed, I was right and it's the most popular C/w ship on AO3. Too bad I’m so indifferent to it…

It’s a shame we never had a full scene with Ariadne or even learned what they were up to during the finale.

I still don't understand how Ibex went from “evil CEO” to “leader of a proletarian revolution”, these sound like completely opposite concepts to me

I probably have talked about this too much and have pretty much given up on ever getting a clear picture due to all of these reimaginings but… Righteousness and Voice… Ibex takes Righteousness out of Mako but he still has Voice, that was pretty much openly stated, correct? So how does that work? I’m guessing Righteousness is hidden somewhere in Voice’s code. But if so:

Did Maryland know? On the one hand, she’s too competent not to. On the other, why would she ever allow or accept that?

How did Righteousness not get corrupted by Rigour too? Maybe it did, but broke off the connection with the rest of itself to contain the damage? Or maybe, on the contrary, it kept in contact and was sending intel to Ibex the whole time? But in that case he would have provided more help in the finale.

[cosmosogler]

oh my god, yesterday was the wooooorst.

i left for the airport on time. the bus app said that the bus would arrive at the stop in 10 minutes (and it was a 2 minute walk away). so i had 2 hours to make a ~30 minute ride.

i missed the bus by so much that i didn’t even see it drive away from the stop before i arrived. the app had just, completely lied i guess? the rest of the day was also like that.

so i walked to the downtown station to try to catch the other bus. i also just missed that one according to the lady at the counter. she said the next downtown bus was coming in 40 minutes. so i called a taxi after fretting about it for a few minutes. the taxi driver said they’d be there in 15-20 minutes so i was like “ok.” the other route would go by in a half hour so a taxi would be faster.

the taxi took over 40 minutes to arrive. i told them never mind and got on the second bus. they said they had just pulled into the station and seemed pretty salty about it. but like... that was more than twice as long as they said they’d take.

the bus didn’t leave the station for another ten minutes. i made the wroooong choice. the bus also stopped at every single stop along the route and got stuck at some long red lights. i called my mother. i complained about it to harrison. but nothin was gonna make that bus go faster.

i missed my flight by 10 minutes.

i got put on the next flight... which was in six hours. instead of 9 or 10 pm, i’d be getting home at 3 am (my time). so i spent 6 hours bumming around the airport. i couldn’t get food when i was hungry because the person behind the counter at the snack bar didn’t show up for a very long time. i started drawing a picture on my ipad that i’d planned on working on during the flight.

the flight took off late. i had had a 20 minute layover in charlotte, so every single minute was making me more and more antsy. then when we arrived in charlotte we got put at the wrong gate so the plane sat there for more than 5 minutes before trundling away to the new gate.

the gate was at the end of one terminal. the plane i had to catch was on the other end of the airport at the end of another terminal. i sprinted!!! i had ten minutes to get there!!!

i was really bummed because you’d think since i can bike 12 miles that i could run for more than one minute before completely losing my breath and stamina. though to be fair i had not eaten and was wearing a heavy backpack and a bra that’s a little too tight. i was wheezing after a few seconds.

i actually made it? and i got my boarding pass printed at the counter with 4 minutes to spare before boarding started. i ran back to the bathroom but the line was so long i’d never make it back to the gate (the area was under construction and the nearest bathroom was more than 2 minutes away from the gate). 

it had been a few hours since i’d gotten to use the restroom, and with my gallbladder out i’ve had less... like, tolerance for waiting. that might be a “stress has destroyed my body” thing more than a gallbladder thing though.

anyway i had to fidget in my plane seat for 45 minutes while waiting for boarding to end and the takeoff and then we had to reach cruising altitude.

on the flight my ipad pencil wouldn’t connect to the ipad (airplane mode i guess?) so i couldn’t draw for the 5 hours i was sitting there. i got out smash instead since i got my 3ds fixed the other day... i got really REALLY good at hitting rest on a moving target as jigglypuff. i spent like 40 minutes doing nothing but that. the other hour was just working on general combos and taking on the computer as dedede. because i had nothing else to do and wanted to get good at it again. i made a gunner mii based off blue but the mii characters don’t really seem to have any natural combos? it’s just really hard to rack up damage with them. jumbi’s way easier to play as, at least. she’s got a sword.

my thumb started hurting from the new thumb stick (it wasn’t broken in yet i guess) so i put the game away and dozed for the rest of the flight. i made some notes for the story... just thinkin about how i wanted to work out some conversations. i mostly wanted to rest because i’d be getting home at 4 am in the morning my time, the airport is an hour away from my parents’ house. i didn’t get any sleep at all.

when i got to the airport my mom and dad were actually there? i thought they’d be picking me up at the curb. but they snuck up behind me while i was trying to get to baggage claim and mom almost pushed me down the escalator.

dad acted like everything’s normal. and i guess things are “normal” now. as in, this is the new normal, because dad has either completely ignored what he did or forgotten about it. 

he probably forgot about it. grabbing and threatening me and using real personal insults wasn’t a big deal ~to him~. grabbing me while i was laying in bed trying to sleep wasn’t a big deal ~to him~.

i pretended to sleep on the car ride home but again couldn’t manage to doze off. i wrote a few more story notes in my memo after a while because i gave up.

when i got home i went basically right to bed without even putting on pajamas and then i couldn’t sleep. wiley came to cuddle with me for a little bit. once he was satisfied that he had stepped on me enough times he left. i still couldn’t sleep.

when i finally did doze off, i woke up like two hours before my alarm was set to go off. so i guess i got like five hours of sleep maybe?

today was a blur. i spent a large fraction of it scanning in my old comic pages. i couldn’t get my sketchbook to fit in the scanner though no matter what i tried (i tried a lot of arrangements). so i’ll either figure that out later or not bother. there was a big dark line down the left side of the images. i was also a little upset that my loose pages didn’t fit in the scanner, so there’s a bit of the side clipped off every page image now. i was so broken up about how much i was losing that i didn’t even change the deviantart images. i know i shouldn’t put stuff on the edges of the page, but i didn’t really register it when i started the comic. i had started to use the whole page, and i put dialogue at the top and off to the sides to give myself more room to draw. i had to erase and redraw a lot of speech bubbles.

then i think i dicked around online for a while, uploading the images and stuff, and then i went downstairs to try to draw on the ipad and maybe finish that picture i’d started. i don’t think it’s going to be a fast picture... i don’t have the energy for shading though.

my brother came home so i said “hi” and “nice anime hair.” his hair is more than twice as long as mine, at least in the front. in the back it’s not quite that much longer. we drove out to freddy’s for dinner and both got real sick from the greasy burgers. he got it worse though because i had a veggie burger. then we got ice cream because we’re geniuses.

then we got groceries but i couldn’t find any tempeh. so tacos are gonna have to wait.

mom came home at 8 pm. she’d been out of the house working or driving to/from work for 13 hours today. she’s going to work for 6 hours tomorrow too. she told me about our my financial situation. but then she gave me a bunch of excuses to not teach me how to do taxes yet again this year.

i gotta start paying off my student loans though. can’t let that interest build up.

villanova apparently blew all my parents’ retirement funds. i didn’t realize they didn’t actually provide us with any financial aid. we couldn’t get loans because of the retirement money... all i managed to do at villanova was almost die!

while i was hanging out with my brother he made a few “jew” jokes. i pretended to be extremely confused. he asked if i’d never heard of jew jokes before and i shrugged and said not really. at least it got him off track. he didn’t tell any more.

i need to read up on how to deal with family members who get... weird about race. my brother’s already made holocaust jokes though. he’s been doing that. i get the feeling he fell in with the wrong crowd. i don’t remember what to do about it.

genevieve seems bored to tears. from the way my family describes her behavior she seems... depressed. she won’t go for walks. she doesn’t leave her bed and doesn’t come when called. she still won’t touch the stairs and she doesn’t spend much time in the backyard. 

i got her to come twice when i called today at least. i had to be really insistent and annoying but she did come over eventually and i highly praised her generosity. that seemed to cheer her up. she wagged her tail and everything. it’s so hot out... maybe tomorrow i can get her to go to the park for a few minutes. we’ll see. 

whenever i try to interact with eve my family, like, tells me how it is with her. like she’s just Like That now and there’s nothing they can do about it. “she won’t go up the stairs. she just won’t.” “she won’t come when we call her. she just looks at us. that’s all she does.” when i called eve my brother actually interrupted me to tell me yet again that she doesn’t come when called.

i got her to come.

when i try to encourage eve to check out the stairs my mother has interrupted me three times to tell me eve won’t go up the stairs. like she doesn’t want me to even try. eve is so lonely. i can tell. she’s bored and lonely. that’s why she’s started chewing up cardboard and stuff left on the floor.

i’m gonna take my work downstairs tomorrow and work in the kitchen i think. 

this evening i tried to start drawing for the comic again. i got one panel done, but IT’S SO HOT HERE. MY HANDS WERE SWEATING BEFORE I COULD EVEN PICK UP THE PENCIL. EVERYTHING GOT SO SMUDGED!!! it’s going to be a real struggle to finish two scenes this week. ten pages... i’ve got three finished already and in my drafts on the comic. so, i need to draw seven pages. i’ll work on it tomorrow if i can. these pages might suffer because of the heat though. i smudged one of the older pages before i could even get it in the scanner. i somehow got graphite on my LEFT hand, which never gets smudgy when i work... it’s always the side of my right hand since i rest it on the paper so it doesn’t shake.

my back really, really hurts. my shoulders and neck also really hurt. i tried stretching, but i didn’t really put a lot of effort into it... i always feel so, like, unable to do things here. unwilling to do things, maybe. lethargic. i didn’t get to meditate yesterday and i’m skipping it tonight because i don’t want to make noise with the guided thing. i’ve been lax about it anyway. i feel so on edge.

when i tried to have lunch at like 10:30 (? i lost track of time) this morning i was immediately very ill. so i ended up not having any food for about 27 hours, if we decide to cut out the leftovers adventure there. i didn’t try to eat again until i went out with my brother. to fast food... only good decisions, folks!!

still feeling super lethargic even though i finished a panel. i’ve got a lot of drawing to do. i hope tomorrow i feel better. on sunday i’m going to the movies with asher, i think. 

you know what i’m probably feeling so low energy because i didn’t eat for so long and also i haven’t slept well in two days. or, really, in a very long time, but especially the last two nights. i still need to talk to mom about finances for, like, hiring a study specialist... i don’t think we’re going to have the money to afford the psychiatrist my therapist recommended. she REALLY wants me to get a second opinion on my meds but i just don’t think it’s a big enough deal to warrant shelling out for full price psychiatrist appointments. that doctor doesn’t take insurance and it’s just... i know how expensive this gets. it’s already expensive enough getting even regular check ups for snoopy.

i hate living here... it’s so dirty and dusty and dilapidated. in my apartment i keep everything pretty orderly and don’t hold on to things i’m not using. or at least, i try not to. i don’t have enough space to hoard random stuff and i don’t get that attached to those things anyway. my mom won’t even throw out old food that nobody ate for the 3 years before it went bad (2 years ago). they’ve been using my room as a storage space while they paint the game room, but that project’s going super slow because they’ve been at it for months now. so now there’s just tons of crap stacked in front of my dresser (so i can’t actually get to the clothes i left here) and you can’t even get to my sister’s door. she’s in korea anyway i guess so that doesn’t matter as much.

ok anyway i’ve been writing for a while now. thanks for listening. i’ve got a lot more sore muscles than just my back and neck and shoulders. maybe i pulled something while sprinting around the airport yesterday, because breathing is a chore and my legs are just... not feelin it. i’m just trying really hard not to get sick. my mom came in my room and coughed all over me without even covering her mouth so it’s like, well, guess i don’t have any control over that either! 

high stakes, no control!!!!!!!!! just how i’m used to it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it’s 11:40 arizona time but i know my body thinks it’s way later. i’m so tired. i don’t think i’ll be able to sleep though. guess i should try anyway.

[aymmidumps]

answerin asks

i picked a few asks to answer bc there’s a lot hhhhh if ur ask isnt answered in this post dont worry, i’ll make another one later!

Anonymous said: your auburn andrew just punched me in the face. i thanked him and asked him to do it again Anonymous said: also i would Die for ur jean he is perfect and wonderful 

  fodmfjhjjh thank you!!

Anonymous said: why Neil always look so Good!!!!!! Poor Andrew looks so weird with the auburn hair. But Neil looks like he's ready to get on the catwalk gotdam boi work it 

  neil looks good with everything because he’s a Pretty Boi, or else some sort of alien. someone mentioned he looks like surfer from cali.   Neil: suh dude

@twinkdanielmolloy said: Question... Which one of the foxes do you think would be dtf with the fish creature from the shape of water 

  oh my God.... nicky would

Anonymous said: I would read the fuck out of your juvie era Andrew fic and that snippet makes me want more omg. Do you have an AO3 account where you post your fics? Or are they on tumblr? Love your art btw!! <3

   THANK YOU! honestly its super messy and its not really andrew’s stay in juvie but in the hospital during the books. i think i started that fic when i was a little depressed bc it has a Lot of stuff i really wish i never wrote. i touch a lot of Andrew’s past traumas and it’s better to get away from that fic a little. However i do want to draw a comic about Andrew in juvie someday!! i think i had some sort of script for the first time aaron and andrew meet, too. but its SO hard drawing my thoughts sometimes :/

  and i no sadly i haven’t written a lot of fics :/ but i do have this little shitty fic i wrote once if u wanna read called Reticence

Anonymous said: I hear your loud no against mullets and I strongly agree. But what about... Neil in the long baggy jorts

  this ask stabbed me in the stomach and stole my wallet

Anonymous said: hi i love ur beautiful art and i hope we see more of your scene redraws from the book?? because they give me life. also i was scrolling through your page and theres so many mullet asks???? lol why?? anyways have a great day and keep up the great work -ghoest  

   Thank u so much :’’’) and yeah scene redraws are so fun but so HARD to do. the real struggle is to like... pose the characters rather than expressing their emotions....... to me at least. and YEAH those cursed mullet asks

Anonymous said: thank god i found your blog again bc i forgot to reblog your art with actual tags and i thought i'd lost it forever and that woulda been a crime bc your art is so amazing and i love your art style

   :’O!! that is very much appreciated anon

Anonymous said: sometimes when you post uncolored tfc sketches and I have a hard time figuring out who's who bc there's a bunch of characters, I always look to their cheekbones and eyeliner..... it never fails to help me out lmao

   akjshsjhj omfg i’m happy those are the most noticiable features because I MEANT them to be :’) also it does look like eyeliner but i meant them to be long eyelashes bc neil is already pretty as he is so he Needs long eyelashes to add up to it

@hammadge said: Hello yes I shall forever be grateful that you drew some fresh jerejean material and I am here to strongly encourage that you do more like.... all the time. whenever. Bc I need more to live. Thank u & I love your art <3

   thanks a bunch!! they were pretty fun to draw, i might draw them again someday

Anonymous said: ur art (especially andreil or anything w andrew) never fails to give me a brief moment of relief and comfort like oh yeah there are characters i love and another world to think about if only for a second

Anonymous said: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR FUCKIN ART AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHGHHHGHGGGGHHHHHH GOD everytime i see it i feel 10 years adding on to my LIFE thabks so mcuh ....

   AHJSHSSNHHJ IM GLAD!!!!! 

@passion-able said: Hello! I JUST finished All for the Game series and I am ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE WITH YOUR ART. I love looooveeee your design of Andrew. His curls are all I ever wanted 😭😭😭 seriously I kept seeing your Andrew while reading the books 👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽 keep up the amazing work I'm definitely sticking around for more as I plunge deeper into this fandom!!!

   THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY!! im glad you liked my take on andrew he’s my fav and my fav to draw :’) thank you so much!! and welcome to TFC!

[lifedreamerphantasai]

Heaven, if you sent us down So we can build a playground For the sinners to play as saints You'd be so proud of what we've made I hope you got some beds around 'Cause you're the only refuge now For every mother, every child, every brotheru Who's caught in the crossfire, who's caught in the crossfire

Stephen - Crossfire

-----

I´ve tried to redraw Suzuyas screaming scene from the manga...  Everytime I see the scene, I get goose bumps right away and wanna cry ;_; It is so fucking emotional! @_@

And. I wanted to say a little about the whole “ToKen - shitstorm”. I am a HideKane shipper. But. We all know from the beginning, that this Manga/ Anime WOULD NEVER BE A BOYS-LOVE MANGA/ANIME!!! And only, because the wild fantasy about gay-guys from a lot of people will never come true here, to say that Sui is a shitty Artist/Autor, is really, REALLY REALLY REEEAALLLYY NOT FAIR!!! Every long story needs new ideas. Without them, it will gets boring. You know. And Sui is a fucking god!! Oh man, guys! Don´t say bad things about him! He creates a whole new universe, only for us (ungrateful) little human! Yeah, Touka is violent, but in A LOT of Mangas/ Animes, there are woman who give their male characters a hit! Ha. Why are there so much people searching for mistakes, only to say something bad? I don´t know. I feel so sorry for Sui. As an Artist. I wannna cry while I read all he bad things going around here. I love the story. And the Artist. And I know he will make the best thing out of it! Go Sui, go! (okay, it would be really great if Hide would comes back ^^) Now it is said and I feel a lot better.

I am off ;)

[ourlittlebitofnothinguniverse]

Hey for the ask thing, all the questions you're comfortable with answering

oh boy!!! heck yeah fun shit thanks my dude! little did u Kno…… I LOVE oversharing !!! lmao muahahahahaha i’m probably gonna answer all of them thank u for enabling it lmfao

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

yah on Rly Bad days

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

like… 3.5? i like the dark but,,, ‘m Scare,,,,,

3. The person you would never want to meet?

Orange Turnip

4. What is your favorite word?

it changes tbh,, hm but i can’t think of any rn!

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

i’d be….. a nice oak! thicc and full of secrets

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

i didn’t lmao reflection what’s that

7. What shirt are you wearing?

i’m wearing the dress i wore to work

8. What do you label yourself as?

annoying or boring lmao but also the Goblin King and that is Good

9. Bright room or dark room?

i still don’t know if this is referring to like paint shade or like the amount of light it gets or like if i sleep in a bright room or dark room so like??? *shrug emoji*

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

i was?? drawing i think

12. Who told you they loved you last?

i think it was @wrenn-frug​ 💕💖 lov u fren!

13. Your worst enemy?

dunno man probably myself but that sounds cliche so like??? the sun bc it always burns me

14. What is your current desktop picture?

a screenshot from song of the sea!!! lOVE that movie!!!! i’d post it but like?? i don’t think i have it saved anymore or if i do i don’t feel like looking but it’s that one scene where they’re walking thru the pretty field towards the trees and there’s foxes in the corner and she’s playing the shell it’s so pretty,,,,,

15. Do you like someone?

uh yah my cat

16. The last song you listened to?

Young God - Halseygood song lov it,,,,

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

oraNGE TURNIP

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

orange turnip my dude i Hate

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

uh nobody ????

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

my squishy thighs and my fantastic stretch marks (which have taken me YEARS to accept)

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

No

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

????????????? secret???? talent?????? lemme check, ,, , , *reaches into a bag* nope bitch empt y aint got No Talent lmao

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

okay so like this is really dumb and i partially answered this in this ask abt the flushing toilets @ night thing but like to elaborate and make it even more dumb not only am i afraid to flush toilets @ night bc it’s just rly creepy and loud to me (esp if i’ve been asleep) but like,, , sort of in the same vein of fear is that when i was little my older sister told me that there was a ghost in the toilet and if i don’t flush it’ll get me and like i kno it’s not tru but like,,,,,, Sometimes,,,,,, (i must clarify i’m not scared of toilets themselves but like flushing freaks me out sometimes like @ night or if i don’t flush fast enough lmao don’t look @ me i’m a mess)

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

Excuse? is this like that i can ONLY eat this sandwich or is it that this is the only sandwich i can ever eat or like i can only ever have one last sandwich bc honestly i’m Not Okay with any of those scenarios no matter how many ingredients i get for the initial creation

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

Dream daddy dating simulator lmao uh?? also probably more food for archie bc he is Expensive

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

Ireland probably. always wanted to see ireland

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?

“Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out” like???? no???? if u don’t drink alcohol why would u want a lifetime supply??? unless i could like…. sell it??? whats the Most Expensive kind i’ll just get an unending supply of heavenly Expensive Alcohol to sell for incredibly inflated prices to the rich bc it’s From Heaven and give the money to the poor bc like,,, why not

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?

bitches gotta keep they damn opinions to themselves if they can’t respect somebody’s life based on factors they can’t help (race, religion, orientation, gender etc) also no money like We Don’t Need It i’m so tired of Needing money

29. What is your favorite expletive?

Fuck bc u can use it in So Many situations

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

o shit probably the twenty dollar metallic watercolors i got bc shit son??? actually probably like my laptop or smth idk

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

my childhood thx

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

this is.. not a questionalthough it is a wonderful scenario

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

none of them bc if the celestial gates of the beyond is real then all the people i’d want to bring back are probably in a Better Place or something and why would i want to drag them to Hell?

34. What was your last dream about?

Cannot remember to save my life altho i kno it was rly weird and convoluted

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

u did not put anything Here so i will Ignore

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

Nope

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

yAH it’s fun!

38. What is the color of your socks?

not wearing any

39. What type of music do you like?

A Lot

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

Sunsets,,, evening is so nice mm m

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

chocolate ayyyy

43. Do you have any scars?

a couple but like for Dumb Reasons

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

I’ve graduated hs but i wanna be an animator when i decide which college to go to

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

my brain pls bartender can i have a Healthy One (correction to favorite word #4: fav word currently is deign)

46. Are you reliable?

i would like to think so

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

are you happy?

48. Do you hold grudges?

YAH but only if i’ve been Pushed Too Far which is Pretty Damn Far by most ppls standards

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

none I am Not a God

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

i have had So Many???? the most recent one was two times in a row random ppl i barely knew asked me for my netflix account bc they didnt have one and like…. bro what who R U,,,,, (i had literally only talked to the first guy once for ten minutes on fb)

51. Are you a good liar?

is the sky green? don’t think so

52. How long could you go without talking?

Very Long but like Only on Bad Weeks

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

None my hair is Magnificent (idk)

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

like birthday cake? never but i lov to bake cakes so like i bake myself cakes all the time

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

i am so bad @ accents i can’t even Read in my Head in accents even though i know what the accent Should Sound Like

56. What do you like on your toast?

peanut butter and banan slices

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

working on a picture of a tiger redraw

58. What would be you dream car?

a Bike bc i Do Not Like cars

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

i only sing in the shower when nobody is home (which is infrequent bc my mom is Always here) bc i am self conscious around most ppl but like Music,,,,, also when i was little i would pretend that i was standing in the rain all sad like in movies lmao

60. Do you believe in aliens?

yah

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

i follow an astrology blog and i read homestuck i mean,,

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

i??? A maybe bc there are a lot of ways to write it pretty idk but like specifically capital A ig

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

Dragons they’re fire-breathing friends and i love them

64. What do you think about babies?

Gross

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.

U Didn’t put anything Here either so like how abt i give u a random fact abt myself that seems good my favorite bird is the lammergeier bc they’re basically irl dragons and they’re so pretty??? love them??? also i hate monkeys and apes esp chimpanzes bc they are scary and too much like humans to me i don’t like them

BOY that took way longer than i thought bc i had to feed my cat halfway thru and everything and like this is a Long Post sorry guys but ayyyyy this was fun thanks ari