#god . what a fucking trust exercise man

[ahalliance]

still thinking about this rly small moment from yesterday….. the silences weigh so incredibly heavy here . they don’t know what they’d do if they lost pomme :(

mini transcript below the cut

[Video Transcript:

Etoiles: On the other hand, dude, if we have to save the Eggs and there’s an Egg that isn’t saved— no, that’s horrible. It can’t be that.

Aypierre: Imagine you— I don’t know. Imagine we have a group of— they’re unable to save Pomme, and it’s the only group without any French.

Etoiles: No but it’s horrible.

Aypierre: Do you, uh— do you hate them forever?

[Pause]

Etoiles: Well then again you couldn’t blame them.

[Pause]

Etoiles: You couldn’t blame them, but—

Aypierre: Imagine it’s Slimecicle’s group, and he misclicks on Pomme, and he kills her.

Etoiles: Then again— oh, Slimecicle’s group, yeah.

end Video Transcript.]

[shlonguru]

Can we get one of Alastor fucking you in his radio booth and broadcasting it to fuck with Vox~ pretty please with a cherry on top💕

God thank you so much for your request and this idea, it really inspired me so much and I might do even more with this cause I find it inherently hot hehe. I'm so happy so many people enjoyed the first part of Alastor x Fem!Reader x Vox and I'm a degenerate so I wrote a second. I hope you guys like it too! Enjoy my fellow degenerates! o/

I would also like to thank @wipmoop for their amazing art cover for this smut! They're truly the best you can check them out !

And with this, I present you, drumroll please :

Alastor X Fem!Reader X Vox 2 - Rematch !

Summary : You're tired of waiting for your rematch and decide to take things into your own hands. Are you ready to face the consequences of your actions ?

Warning : 18+, Smut, dirty talking, oral, oral creampie, creampie, threesome, cum swallowing, praise kink, teasing, overstimulation, rough, cunnilingus, hair pulling, bondage, spanking.

Word Count : 4883 words (Yup, it's worse than the first one.)

After the events of the party Alastor brought you back to the hotel, explaining to Charlie that you might’ve hmm…had more than you could handle. She was delighted at the idea of you residing at the hotel and extended an unlimited invitation to you. You had your own room and actually enjoyed the people there more than you thought you would. You thought you’d give redemption a shot. However, you had been dreaming of your rematch with Vox and Alastor and it occupied most of your daily thoughts, as much as you hated to admit it.

It had been 2 weeks since you moved in and you hadn’t really been seeing Alastor since the party, he was a busy man after all, he was usually very polite when he saw you and would give you a hand kiss or wink at you. You hadn’t seen Vox at all since the party, but it wasn’t too surprising. Slowly, you started realizing that you were okay with what happened being a one-off thing.

This day you had just finished exercises with everyone and was chilling having some tea when Charlie exclaimed: “Oh Alastor is hosting his radio show! We should bring him some tea! Where’s Niffty? She’d be super-fast.” She looked around unable to find her.”

“She was chasing a family of roaches last time I saw her.” You explained drinking your tea. “I can bring him if you want.” You offered, not thinking much of it, but knowing the idea of seeing Alastor brought a slight smile to your face.

“Really?” Asked Charlie with sparks in her eyes. “That is such a selfless act I love it!”

“Is it?” You questioned. She nodded furiously before handing you a tray with a cup of tea, some milk, sugar, and some biscuits on it.

You left the group and started making your way to the radio tower. As you approached it you heard the demon speaking into his mic.

“And that my fellows, is why you should never trust a demon whose name starts with a V. I will return in a moment, enjoy this musical break of electro swing.”

You arrived in front of the door and knocked.

“Come in.” You heard.

You entered the room to find Alastor sitting in front of his station, his legs crossed.

“Oh, Hello Dear!” He exclaimed seeing it was you at the door.

“Hi! Charlie asked me to bring you some tea. How’s your show going?” You smiled as you entered the room. Alastor looked at you intensely as you walked past him, his smile as wide as ever, you could feel his gaze on your body, you were wearing a short red dress hugging your shape and flared at the bottom and a pair of black thigh highs. You sat the tray on the coffee table he had next to him and poured him a cup of tea.

“The show is going as well as it needs to be.” He replied coldly, pausing afterwards. “But more importantly, this dress suits you very well, I don’t think I’ve seen you in a dress since that night at the party.” He proclaimed calmly.

Your face flushed lightly and he noticed. He hadn’t talked about the party since that night and the simple mention of it sent back embarrassing flashbacks to your mind. Not that you regretted it.

“Oh really? I hadn’t noticed. This is more casual though.” You replied, not looking him in the eyes.

“Is it now Dear?” Asked the demon searching for your gaze then looking you from the bottom up.

“I'm glad you like it." You teased then presented the cup in front of him and thought you noticed a quick glance at your cleavage.

This was enough for you to decide that you had done progress at the hotel and that meant you deserved a little reward, and if you were honest with yourself, you had missed Alastor and Vox’s touch since that night, after all, they had given you a night you could never forget as promised. You had been a good girl but now it was time to drop the act.

You lingered giving him a good look. You then asked innocently: “Is there anything I can do to help?”

He took a good look at you, almost as if he was trying to gauge your intentions. “Actually, I do, would you grab me the mic from the shelf over there.”

“Sure!” You replied smiling. You made your way to the shelf and pretended to struggle to grab the mic which fell to the floor and rolled under the shelf. You then got on all fours and bent over trying to grab it, almost exposing your parts. After grabbing it you stood back up and turned around only to be met with Alastor smiling widely, leaning on the counter of his studio.

“Are you doing okay, Dear?” He grinned tauntingly before taking a sip.

“I don’t know, am I? Here’s your mic.” You handed him the mic. He put down his cup of tea and grabbed the mic slowly, not breaking eye contact with you. He then proceeded to pull swiftly on it, bringing you with it as you hadn’t let go yet. Your body ended up pressed against his.

“You know if you had been craving my attention this badly you should have mentioned it sooner.” He exclaimed looking deep into your eyes.

“Did I crave your attention, or did you miss giving it to me?” You asked smugly smirking back.

“Oh, I can give it to you alright.” He smiled wider, his mouth an inch from yours.

“Do it then.” You smiled back, holding the fold of his jacket.

You felt his lips crash onto yours, the both of you dropping the mic simultaneously. He grabbed your hips tightly pulling you into the kiss, kissing you even deeper as he moved one hand behind your neck. He then lowered his hands to your ass before grabbing both of your cheeks tightly, pulling you off the ground, you legs locking around him instinctively. He turned around, still kissing you while holding your weightless body and sat you on the edge of the counter of his studio. He grabbed both of your wrists and laid you on your back, pinning your hands above your head. He then proceeded to kiss down your neck and onto your cleavage.

“Coming here dressed this way was your mistake.” He smirked.

“Debatable.” You smirked back.

He kept both of your hands pinned together with one of his and took a good look of your flushed, panting, and eager body. While scanning down your body he noticed something that made his eyes widen slightly before he went back to looking into your eyes with a devious smile. His second hand travelled down your body making you realize how sensitive you felt already.

“You might not have missed my attention but this part of you certainly has.” His hand then rubbed against your womanhood, making you realize just how soaked you were already as you squirmed.

“Listen Dear,” he looked at you, still rubbing your pussy, “I’m going to let go of your hands, but you may not touch anything but yourself with them.” He then let go of your hands and pussy before bending over you, resting both of his hands on each side of your head.

“Understood?” He menacingly whispered with a very serious grin.

You nodded.

“Good girl. And be sure to make all of hell know how good you’re feeling.” He smiled before removing his jacket which he threw on his couch.

“Wha-“ You were about to question but then saw him casually turn on the mic of his station. The sign [On Air] turning bright red confirming what you thought.

Alastor then proceeded to kneel in front of you and pull you closer, to the edge of the counter, he then ripped your panties in one movement and started digging in.

You immediately felt his tongue dig deep inside of you, earning a loud moan out of you as he spread your walls. The moans kept pouring as he enthusiastically ate you out, alternating between the inside and the outside of your pussy that he was eating like the first meal he’d had in days. He kept moving his tongue in motions that sent jolts up and down your body.

Before you realized, your hands had made their way into Alastor’s hair, pulling slightly as the pleasure intensified. You only noticed when the pleasure stopped. You looked down, confused, and immediately realized your mistake, letting go of his hair, as the tall demon stood back on his feet, looking at you calmly, which somehow made it scarier.

“Didn’t we agree on you touching nothing but yourself? See not only have you not touched yourself, but you’ve also touched me, and I am not part of you, yet.” He said menacingly.

“Sorry…” You muttered.

“Too late Darling, I’m afraid bad girls need to be disciplined.”

You stared at him as you witnessed him calmly removing his bowtie then grabbing both of your wrists once again, this time tying them together, in a very tight fashion.

“Good.” He exclaimed proud of his work.

And with that he resumed eating you out, this time more aggressively. You felt your walls tighten as he attacked them relentlessly, grabbing your thighs with both of his hands. Your moans were getting louder and louder as his name poured continuously out of your mouth until you felt the knot that had been building up break and the orgasm wash over your body, making your legs shake in the process.

“Holy shit…” You blurted, panting hard as you watched Alastor stand up and give you a quick kiss.

“See, you know how to be a good girl.” He whispered in your ear before licking your ear lobe. You felt his throbbing crotch press against yours.

Before any of you could add anything, you saw a glowing blue circle draw itself around the both of you.

“What is th-“ You couldn’t finish your sentence as you felt yourself fall down through what had now obviously been a portal. The radio demon fell with you, though in a much classier and composed manner, almost as if he knew it was coming.

You felt yourself land on something soft and looked around. It was a very large bed. Alastor had landed comfortably on his feet next to the bed.

“Took him long enough…” He huffed.

You scanned the room; it was very large and luxurious, like a palace. It was a giant bedroom with huge French windows, and tall wooden doors at its entrance. As soon as you laid your eyes on said doors they opened violently.

“The fuck is wrong with you !?” Yelled the handsome tall demon entering the room. It was a very furious Vox. Seeing him furious made you immediately crave him.

“Well, hello to you too.” Smiled Alastor, still in the same relaxed position.

“Why would you broadcast her for all of hell to listen to? Have you lost your mind?” He screamed unable to compose himself.

“I only did so long enough for you to notice.” He mentioned “And if you were so bothered by it, then maybe you should have noticed sooner.” He smiled wider.

“What a dumbass.” Vox walked past Alastor and arrived in front of you. He smiled for the first time.

“Long time no see y/n !” He leaned in front of you making you blush as you took a good look at his handsome figure.

“Hi Vox! I’ve missed you!” You smiled with your face still flushed from your orgasm. He held your chin up gently.

“Fuck I really missed that hot face of yours, I’m sorry you were stuck with such an ungrateful prick for so long, I knew you should’ve moved into my place instead. You’ve clearly gone way too long without getting some well-deserved action, which would have never happened here by the way.” He said that last part louder on purpose. He looked down for a second. “Dear, you are making my sheets wet already, did you really miss me that much?” He smiled looking at your exposed parts, dripping onto the bed.

“We could have settled on a date to have our rematch instead of you exposing her to every lowlife that would listen.” He turned to Alastor.

“Our dear friend couldn’t wait any longer and well I guess I had to take matters into my own hands.” He said innocently.

“You’re such a piece of shit.” Proclaimed Vox with a wide grin on his face, briefly glitching. “I see you’re unable to try and beat me without a head start you radio bastard.”

“It’s not like I was doing anything you could do anyways, Mr. Flat-screen-no-tongue.” The redhead smirked.

“Oh really?” He glitched lightly. “Sit back, relax and shut the fuck up.”

He turned to you, and away from Alastor.

“Y/n! Time to get that rematch baby! Get your ass on the edge of that bed and spread those legs for me!”

Your body moved on its own at this command, and you managed to sit up at the edge of the bed despite your wrists still tied together and sat with your thighs spread open, revealing your most intimate part which couldn’t lie about how much you wanted this. Vox looked at you intensely, taking in the sight he had missed more than he thought he had and bent over resting one hand on his knee, the other holding the bowtie tying your wrists together with a finger.

“Has someone been a bad girl~?” He teased.

“That’s entirely possible.” You smirked back. You could tell from his face he liked that. He let go of your wrists and grabbed both of your thighs tightly, making you lose your balance and fall back onto the bed. The next instant, you sensed something that felt like a tongue slide inside your pussy. It sent immediate literal jolts up your body, earning a loud moan out of you that surprised even you. You came a little from that but didnt say anything, you moved your head, looking at what was going on down there and saw a big blue tongue, sliding out of Vox’s screen and eating out your deepest parts.

“Oh wow!” You exclaimed not knowing what to make of the mix of intense pleasure, surprise and shock you were feeling. A quick glance behind Vox and you saw Alastor roll his eyes unbothered having a cup of tea on the sofa not too far. You didn’t have time to really process anything as the TV demon kept eating you out aggressively, making your orgasm come sooner than you would have expected. You had absolutely no control over how fast it was building up, you just felt it snap and felt yourself come, arching your back embracing the wave of pleasure, grabbing your dress tightly as you did so.

You felt the tongue pull out of you and giving your whole pussy a good lick before Vox stood back up, wiping his face with a satisfied look on his it.

“Fuck you’re so hot when you come.” He blurted trying to keep his composure, but you could already see his member throbbing through his pants.

“Are you done with your ridiculous endeavor? An attempt to prove what exactly?” Exclaimed Alastor in a tone he tried to portray as nonchalant, but everyone else could tell he was ticked off. “Can’t you see she comes so easily you could barely even consider it a challenge.”

That statement pissed you off because as much as you were enjoying yourself you didn’t like being underestimated.

“I had no idea my enjoying myself would make you this insecure?” You responded smirking in your brattiest tone.

“Oh, I like you more and more.” Said Vox raising his brows and smiling at you.

You could swear you noticed an eye twitch on Alastor.

“You brat…clearly if you’re still feeling this confident then we haven’t gone hard enough on you.” He declared with a wicked smile scaring you as much as it turned you on. Alastor teleported onto the bed next to you, grabbed your hair firmly into a ponytail and pulled you further into the large bed, leaving you no choice but to follow him on your knees before pulling your face close to his. Your tied hands were hanging down in front of you as you looked up at the radio demon. “I guess we’ll have to fix that.” He kissed you deeply shoving his tongue in your mouth making your head spin. He pulled away from the kiss for a second.

“Sorry Dear, I am but a terrible spectator.” He went back into the kiss making you dizzy as he pulled down the top of your dress making your breasts bounce out of it. He grabbed one of your tit with his free hand, pinching your nipple and making you whine softly.

"Now you’re going to use all that confidence you were so proud of just seconds ago and you’re going to take it all in.” He let go of you and you fell on all fours, now facing his crotch. You took a good look and immediately noticed how tight his pants looked around his cock, it almost looked painful. With your tied wrists you unzipped his pants, pulling out your reward.

‘Was it this big last time?’ you thought to yourself. A slight look of surprise covering your face for a brief instant.

“Yes, it was.” Replied the radio demon, as if he had read your mind. “You were just too eager to notice.” He finished. You blushed heavily before giving your best shot at taking as much of his member as you could in your mouth, it amounted to about 2/3 of his manhood.

“Not quite, Dear, here, let me give you a hand.” He chuckled before shoving your face down his member, lodging it all the way down your throat. You couldn’t breathe but it still felt good, you pussy was quivering and dripping, and Vox noticed.

“Damn, look at your cunt, don’t worry I gotchu.” You heard Vox who was right behind you and the moment after felt him give your ass a hard spank. That made you moan loudly, and you knew Alastor felt it when you heard a groan coming from him, you looked up only to be met with an intense and serious gaze filled with lust coming from the radio demon. His hands were both in your hair, guiding your mouth up and down, enjoying himself.

Vox stood right behind you, and you heard his pants unzip. Immediately after, you felt one of his hands rest on your hips and the tip of his cock rub against your entrance teasingly.

“Have you missed that?” He asked, lust exuding off his tone. After a few seconds of his teasing, you wanted to beg for him to insert it but you mouth was too full for that.

“Come on…” He teased, knowing he put you in an impossible position.

In one motion you pulled your mouth off Alastor’s cock and pleaded loudly. “Vox please I need your cock in me!” You looked at him with a lewd look on your face .

Seeing you in that state made him blush briefly before he composed himself again.

“Fucking finally! You’re so fucking hot!” He groaned loudly pushing all of him inside of you in one go making you scream of pleasure in the process. You immediately felt Alastor grab your hair in the same fashion he had moments ago, pulling your face close and squinting.

“Let’s not get distracted now, shall we?” He demanded sternly.

Vox felt you tighten around him as you heard those words, pulling an involuntary moan out of him.

“You naughty girl, you’re loving this aren’t you?” He spanked roughly you before starting to thrust at a rather fast pace.

“Obviously.” Declared Alastor smiling before shoving your face back onto his cock. He was the one thrusting now, in fact, they both were and soon enough, you felt that coil build up once again in your insides. Your eyes rolled back as you felt the knot snap.

Vox felt you tighten almost uncomfortably around his member as you came. He grabbed both of our ass cheeks tightly.

“That’s right, come for me!” He groaned throwing his head back and fucking you through your climax, holding your ass tightly then spanking it.

You had just finished coming when you felt Alastor pull out of your mouth. You exhaled loudly catching your breath.

“Good job not suffocating, here’s your reward.” Said Alastor grabbing your panting figure, pulling you off Vox and propping you onto his cock as he stood on his knees, you were still panting but it was now intertwined with moans as he effortlessly moved you up and down his member. You moved your tied up wrists over his head, wrapping your arms around his neck and grabbing it gently, you kissed him softly yet longingly as the moans continuously flooded out of your mouth. You felt his member grow thicker inside of you, as expressed by your moans becoming louder. Your kiss was interrupted by the TV overlord who grabbed your chin, turning your face away from the radio demon.

“Now you can’t just give all your holes away so easily my dear.” He said calmly standing bent over next to you.

“My apologies.” You replied looking up into his eyes.

“You’re forgiven.” He added with a smooth voice before you felt his lips meet yours. You were surprised at how soft they felt, and you had just found out he could do such a thing. He probably didn’t do it every day, but he was such a good kisser, you were dazzled by the kiss before he pulled out of it.

“Now open up dove, we’re not done just yet.” He grinned.

He hadn’t finished his sentence that you had opened your mouth, eagerly awaiting him.

“My god you’re such a good little slut.” He laughed not able to contain himself any longer, he pushed himself deep into your mouth and moaned loudly as he did so, you started moving your head swallowing his member to the base each time.

You hadn’t noticed because of how gradual it had been, but Alastor was now moving much faster than how he had started, hitting your deepest parts each time.

“Are you going to come again and prove me right?” Alastor smirked at you, pausing his thrusting for a moment and spanking your ass roughly. You moaned loudly around Vox’s cock and stopped moving as he immediately grabbed your head and kept the thrusting going.

“Nuh uh, you can’t stop yet.” The TV demon said as he kept pumping in and out of your mouth.

You looked at Alastor from the corner of your eye.

“What is it sweetheart? The TV got your tongue?” He spanked you again this time harder. Your pussy tightened around him, and he felt it, making his grin widen even more.

You looked at him trying your hardest to stay in control.

“Aww you still think you can decide whether you come or not. How adorable…I guess it’s time I teach you this lesson.” He squinted his eyes challengingly before he spanked you one last time, harder than all the other time, this time immediately grabbing both of your ass cheeks very firmly, not breaking eye contact with you.

“I…” He slammed you against his cock. “…decide…” He slammed harder. “…if…” He slammed even harder, digging his nails into your ass. “…and when…” He slammed hard and you felt yourself dangerously close to the edge. “…you come!” He grinned, slamming one last time harder than you had ever felt him thrust in you and he saw your eyes roll back as your pussy started pulsating around his cock. You moaned loudly around Vox’s cock, who pulled out just in time to hear it aloud. You were panting hard, your whole body going limp.

Vox grabbed your face and pressed your cheeks together bringing his face close to yours. “You’ll relax soon enough bitch, but we’re not done yet.” He then proceeded to grab you off Alastor and prop you once again on all fours. You were wobbly at best. “Come on are you already exhausted? After all this big talk?” He spanked you now red ass making you whine. You moaned softly and looked at him with pleading eyes. Your legs felt weak from all this thrusting and climaxing, and he could tell. He let out a soft sigh.

“Here. Let me give you a hand.” He grabbed one of your legs and propped it on his shoulder. “Now you’re going to take it like a good girl?” He looked at you his eyes focusing intensely on you.

“Yes, Sir.” You pleaded. As soon as he heard those words coming out of your mouth he felt an irrepressible urge to take you and you felt all of him enter you once more, at this point your pussy being overstimulated felt so sensitive everything felt ten times more intense. You moaned loudly while your tongue hung out of your mouth, and you gripped the sheets tightly as Vox started thrusting more roughly than he previously had.

Alastor, seeing your tongue hanging and your mouth open, took this opportunity to push himself inside your mouth and started thrusting.

“Enjoy your own taste dear, because you’re about to taste me.” He declared with a sadistic gaze on his now flushed face. You loved seeing the evolution of his boldness as lust took over.

“Shit you’re so fucking tight!” Vox thrusted hard, gritting his teeth, and digging his nails into your thigh, pulling it close against his chest as he lost himself in pleasure, his movement becoming more erratic as he glitched and he brought himself closer to the final release, nevertheless, he never failed to hit your G-spot with each thrust. You felt it coming, despite your best efforts, they both felt you tense up more and more. You still did a great job wrapping your tongue around the radio demon’s shaft, you heard his breath get shakier as he maintained composure fucking your mouth, one hand under your chin and the other in your hair.

You felt the knot about to snap as you hear them both declare as one:

“Are you ready?”

They both thrusted deep in you one last time, releasing simultaneously, filling you up from both sides as you came one last time, almost seeing stars at this point.

Alastor let out the closest thing to a moan as he emptied himself directly down your throat tightening around his member, slowly pulling himself out afterwards and enjoying the sight of your dazed expression.

“Good job.” He patted your cheek smiling and slightly panting, much more relaxed than a few moments ago.

Vox pulled out next and you immediately collapsed onto the bed, cum flowing out of you.

“Holy shit you felt so fucking good!” Vox also felt all sorts of dizzy after his orgasm. He quickly got a grip and they both grabbed what was necessary to clean you up, laying you down comfortably after Alastor removed his bowtie from your sore wrists and Vox handed you one of his shirts to wear.

You were fast asleep and woke up probably a few hours later to both of them having tea in the corner of the room.

“Oh, shut the fuck up, you can’t talk your way into being better in bed, she literally blacked out after I made her come, that’s how good it was.” Expressed Vox with frustration.

“Maybe that or you were just so boring she fell asleep.” Replied Alastor calmly sipping his tea.

“Fuck off, weren’t you facefucking her as well? Wouldn’t that make you boring by extension?” He proclaimed, anger taking over his tone.

Alastor ignored him. You moved in the bed making it creak and earning their attention.

“Oh, looks like our friend has finally awaken from her great slumber.” Announced the radio demon.

They both arrived by your side as you fully came to.

“Hello beautiful.” Exclaimed Vox, with his usual smile and composure. “How are we doing?”

“Well!” You replied attempting to stretch then realizing how sore your whole body felt. “Never mind.” You added.

They both smiled with a satisfied look on their face, almost as if admiring their work.

“Yeah, you need to rest. Next time try not to bite off more than you can chew sweetheart.” Declared Vox with Alastor nodding approvingly next to him.

“Any idea who performed best this time Dear?” Asked the radio demon.

“I mean, it’s hard to give you an answer when you both do whatever you want at all times.” You said with a hint of frustration. “Maybe if you both stuck to one hole, I would be able to tell.” You added, genuinely trying to recall all the events in the right order.

“Hmm, No.”

“Nope.” They both proclaimed simultaneously.

“We will, however, keep fucking you until you give us an answer.” Gloated Vox with a hint of excitement in his voice.

“I’m afraid it’s the only way.” Added Alastor calmly.

“Fair.” You conceded.

‘Holy shit what did I get myself into…’ You thought to yourself.

“Now, rest my dear, you’re going to need it.” Said Vox still smiling at you before vanishing into electricity out of the room.

“I’ll see you soon Darling.” Declared Alastor before smiling and disappearing into a shadow.

To be continued...

Vox is genuinely so effortless to write. I love how versatile he can be, Alastor on the other hand is rough -.- but once I'm done I can fully appreciate it.

PS : I know Alastor is Aroace and I hope no one takes offense to my work. I genuinely take pleasure in writing smuts and I've been loving his personality that's all.

Peace out ! o/

[vaaaaaiolet]

Leon gives beyond what's asked of him at both work and home, in excess. He's stressed, overworked; worrying you sick. So you teach him how to take. More or less.

mdni. f / m, SHAMELESS smut. light dom/sub w leon subbing, super light bondage. no huge warnings just your run of the mill, emotionally charged p in v + aftercare!!

word count: 1.2k // read on ao3

a/n: stuff i have fun writing gets zero engagement LMAO but i just wanted to make porn sound pretty :( sorry if it makes no sense i just ughghguh lord knows re4r leon's about to go through it even more than he already has. i need to treat him so right.

It doesn’t take much to lure Atlas to your bed, or at least the form he takes on Earth while you’re still on it. Leon’s been weary with the weight of the sky for a while. Between his missions and taking care of nearly everything at home, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth; you worry the burden is compressing his spine. He never says no to you.

Leon, seriously! You’re going to hurt yourself.

Don’t get up, I can get it mysel- aaand you’re not listening.

You’re so sweet, baby, but you didn’t have to.

He won’t give you a break because he won’t give himself a break, and you’re sick of it. Fed up.

So here’s what you do about it. You put on something sweet and lacy, distracting for all the right reasons because you’re Artemis, tying rope into a trap. And you crook a finger at Leon one night when he’s especially pent up. 

He’s as good as ever. Leon’s kisses come out all huffy and sharp and eager to please when he tries pulling you in, but you know he’s twisting the truth about what he wants.

“Wanna try something,” you tell him.

Confusion crooks his brow. 

“I need to know that you trust me.”

A rhetorical question, really. He’s not particularly fond of traffic lights. Leon decides on sparkler as his white flag, and you let him slot his thigh between your legs one last time for luck before you take him under.

Leon’s a filthy liar. Don’t blame him; his hands were tied.

Correction: his hands are tied. Onto the headboard. He’s falling to pieces, whine as he might, begging to sink his fingers into the swell of your hips, anything to hold on while you give him a taste of his own medicine. All he knows how to do is give, give, give. Tonight, you’re teaching Leon how to take.

Your soft palm envelops his cock. His chest burns where your mouth hovers. 

“Baby, please,” Leon lets out a shuddering breath when you squeeze up his length. 

You’ve been at this for a while, dangling yourself just out of his reach. He’d slipped off your body a baby blue lingerie set matching his eyes, a spoonful of sugar to make the medicine go down, right? You spin around the color wheel, blue to red, swirling your tongue over his flushed nipples. Leon has never not tasted sweet and this time is no exception.

“Please, what?”

“Do something,” he begs. “Can’t…hold off. Don’t wanna-” Leon interrupts himself with a gasp as you go hands-off at the mere suggestion. “Sweetheart, please!”

"Do you still just want to make me feel good?” you ask.

He nods feverishly. 

Wrong answer. 

You buck on his lap just shy of where he aches most, and he keens beautifully. “What do you really want, Leon?” 

Leon fights the arch building in his back. “Want to f-f- fuck, that feels…”

“Right track, baby,” you coo. 

You lean forward as a treat, let him kiss up your breasts how you know he likes. Gentle teeth bite your tender flesh; you hiss in pleasure. This exercise is as much a lesson in control for him as it is for you because you’re going a little hazy yourself. Try straddling the man who would gladly bring down the moon and stars if you so as much ask, and then denying him the single thing he wants most. You.

You’d give up everything for him. Just as he would for you. 

God, that’s where he gets it from, isn’t it? What is it about rules for thee but not for me?

Leon bucks when you loosen his metaphorical reins; smells petrichor that wasn’t there before your head went all stormy. He gazes up at you with cobalt eyes, and suddenly decides that he’s done with his learning curve.

“I want you to fuck me,” he blurts.

You kiss him, soft and sweet. “You’re gonna take what I give you?”

“Everything.”

“Why, baby?” 

Here’s the million dollar question, and Leon passes with flying colors. “‘Cause I…cause I want to feel good.”  

“Why should you? Hm?” You pray he doesn’t let the initial sting of your words get to him when you slip the weeping head of his cock along your slit. The pleasure is quick, fleeting. Not enough. Leon does more than enough and you need him to understand. You have to untie his hands, and they spring free; come home to your hips. Old habits die hard. Leon’s dipping two fingers inside your sopping wet cunt already.

Rephrasing might help. “Why should I make you cum?” you ask, swallowing hard to keep the shudder out of your voice when his knuckle digs into your clit. An opening. 

His eyes pinpoint to pricks.

“Because I fucking deserve it,” Leon growls. “So give it to me.”

The student becomes the master not a moment too soon. 

You urgently notch the head of his cock inside your starving cunt, nearly choking him at the snug fit. He’ll never get used to the feeling of you taking him in. You’re always free to swallow him however you please, but the way your insides wrap around him is unmatched to any mortal feeling he can liken to. Your pussy is poetry in practice.

“Teasing me for damn near hours and won’t even let me touch you.” Leon’s nails bite half-moons onto your thighs as you mount him. “You know what that does to me?”

“That’s how I feel when you don’t fucking take a break,” you bite back. “Leon, you’re gonna work yourself sick, you’re making me crazy!”

What if you’re going about this all wrong? 

“F-Feeling’s mutual. Ugh!” Leon bites off a shout at the molten welcome of your walls all along his length as he sinks home. “So good, so fucking good, baby. Needed to be in you so bad. Thought I was gonna die- oh,” he cuts off a moan when your hips roll hungrily over his, “just like that. Just like that, baby.”

You syncopate your rocking with his heaving breath. Run your palms down the ridges of his hard-earned abs. This is a tandem ride to the tilt that threatens to push you over the edge and you’re fighting it because you still need to get your point across. 

“I want you to - fuck! - take care of yourself,” you cry. “Let me do things for you. Like-” 

Electricity sings through your core through the traitorous press of a thumb weak to your tears.

“-this.” Leon finishes, smiling weakly.

“I loved it, I swear! Did you see me, like, at all?”  

“That’s not the point…” you muffle an embarrassed groan into Leon’s chest as he laughs to himself. Bastard. You’re in his arms keeping his spent cock warm inside you, secretly burning with shame. 

You wanted to do it right, fuck him within an inch of his life ‘cause it’s the first time he’s ever expressed wanting anything from you – and you’d gone and fucked it up. He’d made you cum first and then finished. Chivalry could suck it. 

“I get it.” Leon nods solemnly. “You just got tired of the usual.”

Your heart stops.

“Kidding, sweetheart.” 

Again, bastard. 

“Message received loud and clear,” he kisses the top of your head, and you finally settle down into the smiley afterglow that comes after sex with Leon. “I’ll share the load with you,” he promises, kissing your cheeks, “tell you what I need, take it easier on myself.”

“And why should you?” you ask.

Familiar question, right? You hope it rings bells.

Leon grins. “Cause I deserve it.”

It rings true.

psst, find more of my work here!

comments and reblogs are very much appreciated <3 take care and i love you!

[so-much-for-the-seashells]

The Fun Kind of Sparring Pt. 2

Soldier Boy (The Boys) x Reader

(Aka minors do NOT interact with this post)

A/N: Sooooooo… did ya miss me?? Heh. My down stairs brain has been exercised, that’s for sure. Took five but now I’m trying to change lives 💪

Anyways, as always, all interaction, especially commentary/tags, is extremely appreciated! It really makes my day to hear that people like what I’m putting out there.

Content Warning: 🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️🌶️ If you thought the last one was diddle-that-skittle-worthy, this one… I think I’m going to need to take a cold shower. I mean, my man doesn’t stop talking. I will say he’s really sweet to the reader. A few things he says sound more like him in canon, but overall he’s really sweet. Look, guys, life is lifing rn so I just needed a sweet hot old man to talk me through it 🤷‍♀️

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Previously on The Fun Kind of Sparring

"Good girl," he praises, and it's all I can do not to keen. I have to be soaked through my shorts by now, there's no way. "Well, what l'd do next... that's simple. I'd fuck her until she cried, and then I'd keep going. And I'd keep going until the only thing she can remember is my name, until she's gooey and clingy and a sweet little fucked out thing, all for me," he finishes, his grin from before returning back to his face. I'm losing it. I can't think straight. And yet- he's still waiting for me to make the first move. Son of a bitch.

"O-okay," I clear my throat, unable to find my senses. "And if that hypothetical girl was me?" We both know it's me, I just need to hear it.

"Well in that case I think l'd be the luckiest bastard who ever lived," he says sincerely, looking at me with a gaze that can only be described as pure adoration and lust. Yep. That's it for me. I lean up and kiss him with as much force as I can muster.

A strand of spit connects our lips when we part, and if I hadn’t heard him say all those dirty things I’d think it was the most erotic thing imaginable. It’s certainly a close second, though.

He crashes his lips back to mine once the strand breaks, demanding access that I could never be strong enough not to give. He explores my mouth with great fervor, silencing the small whimpers and whines trying to tear themselves from my throat. Once he’s sure I’m breathless he moves down, planting a row of kisses to my jaw before kissing down my neck, biting and sucking dark marks at the juncture of my neck and shoulder.

But through the lust induced haze that’s already clouding my brain I can only remember one thing.

“Uh, Ben?” my voice is unrecognizable, breathy and high.

“Yeah?” He says into my collarbone where he’s been leaving more love bites.

“What about you? Don’t you get to come in the story?”

“Oh, you’re sweet on me, huh, baby? Don’t you worry about me sweet girl, that’ll come later- no pun intended.”

“Oh, okay,” I mumble, tugging him up by the hair so I can kiss him again. “I could kiss you forever,” I say. And it sounds stupid, but his plush pink lips are just too good to be true.

“That can be arranged, sweetheart,” he smirks, leaning down to kiss me again. There’s just no feeling like it. I reach for the hem of his grey sweatpants, but he grunts, pulling away. I look at him, eyes wide with confusion.

“Sugar, as much as I’d love to give some sad sap the chance of walking in on this, I think it’s better we move this to my room.”

“Oh, okay,” I concede.

“Trust me,” he says, almost… shifty? Whatever. I’m too horny to decipher his gaze at the moment. I let him all but pick me up off the floor, and I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror embellished wall: my face is sweaty and splotchy, hair already a wreck, hickies everywhere on my neck and shoulders. Holy hell. I haven’t even gotten laid yet, and I look like I went nine rounds in a porno. Motherfucker. Me-fucker, in a minute. Good god.

“I think I’m an artist,” he says smugly from behind me, admiring the blues and purples on my neck and shoulders, and catching my gaze in the mirror. He presses his bulge to my ass, at which I gasp. He’s huge. I can already tell. How the fuck does he even-? I don’t even know how I’m going to finish that question.

“C’mon sweetheart, my room ain’t far.”

“Okay,” I mumble, stuck on the absent feeling of his bulge against me. “But the floor was so hot,” I pout.

“Don’t I know it, sweets,” he grins. “But I’ve got big plans for you, if you remember.”

I moan softly at the memory of his dirty words

“Attagirl.” The shit eating grin from before is right back on his face. “Now c’mon, sweets,” he tugs my hand in his, practically dragging me out of the gym. Before I know it I’m laying on my back in his soft bed, him over me. He somehow kisses me both soft and slow, and rough and fast, and it’s almost impossible to breath. Especially as he adds more to the canvas he’s made of my body.

“Can I?” he asks, tugging at the hem of my shirt. I nod, and pulls it up over my head, obviously enjoying what he finds under it.

“Of course my pretty girl has pretty tits too, I shouldn’t even be surprised, but”-he kisses the tops of each of my breasts-“damn, baby.”

I blush at his praise, unable to help myself. “Can I take off this cute little bra?” he asks.

“Mhm,” I say, hoping that he’ll just rip it off. But instead of being raucous he gently unclasps it from behind, teasing it off of me. He trails lower with his lips, lavishing my breasts in attention that leaves them perky and alert once he leaves them for my stomach.

I can’t help but start giggling at the feeling of his scratchy beard on my stomach as he continues his trek of kisses and such southward. “What’s funny?” he asks, obviously amused by my laughter. I can only giggle harder because he seems to catch on, now intentionally scratching at me with it. He starts kissing lower and lower, and eventually my giggles dissolve into moans as he nips at the juncture of my thigh and pelvis.

“So sweet,” he mumbles, tugging at the waist band of my shorts. He pulls both them and my underwear off in one go. “Oh, sweets,” he breathes. “You this wet all for me?”

I squeak, unable to respond to the dark, lust-filled look in his eyes as he asks. Thankfully the question is rhetorical, because my brain is already starting to get fuzzy.

He gingerly pulls off my shoes and socks, before pressing featherlight kisses to and massaging up my left leg. Just as he reaches my sopping heat does he stop, biting the squishy flesh of the inside of my thigh before returning back down on my right leg.

“Ben,” I whine impatiently, unsure of how much more of this teasing I can take before I just come without him doing anything.

He just tuts at me before continuing his ministrations. And good grief does he know what buttons to press, because my legs already feel like jello in his hands.

Finally he bites my other thigh, and I’m all but shaking with how eager I am for him to do something, anything to me. And he seems to be more than happy to comply.

“Listen, if you tell me to stop, I’ll stop,” he says roughly, sincerely, as his cheek rests against the inside of my thigh.

“O-okay?” I say, my tone far past breathy.

“That’s my girl,” he grins before diving in.

It’s like nothing I’ve felt before. It feels like he’s lit orgasmic fireworks, like far too much and not enough all at once, like… it’s fucking inexplainable. Especially while I’m physically squirming from how good it feels, while he only needs one big hand splayed over my stomach to keep me down. I couldn’t even tell you what I’m moaning between the incoherent mess of his one syllable name and the whines he’s pulling out of me.

It’s incredible. And he’s so methodical, so good at it. Eighty odd years of experience will do it to you I guess, but this is like, next level.

And before I know it my stomach is tightening in on itself, and I try to warn him. I really do. But he doesn’t even need me to warn him. Instead he takes his hand off my stomach and places both on either of my thighs, locking me in place around his head. And before I know it, his tongue thrusting in and out of me and his nose and facial hair rubbing on my clit have me coming with a loud cry of his name. I’m physically shaking by the end of it from how he continues to fuck me through it, lapping up every last drop.

The thing about Ben is that he does everything with great fervor. Passion, really, except he thinks that’s too feminine a word. There just has to be a certain exceptionality to the way he does things. When he snorts a line of coke, the line had better be four times longer than anyone else’s. When he performed back in the day, it had to be more grandiose than Queen, more ostentatious than Madonna. When he eats pussy, it has to be fucking leagues ahead of any other man or woman in the entire world.

And man oh man does he deliver. I think I come again, but it’s hard to tell from how intense the initial orgasm was and how fuzzy the overstimulation is making my brain. But he eventually pulls back, once again resting his stubbled cheek on the inside of my thigh, my come glistening on his jaw and mouth. It’s a sight of debauchery in its purest-or should I say filthiest- form. I’m panting, trying to ground myself as he smugly smirks at me, his greens eyes sparkling like cut emeralds.

“Y’like that, sweetheart?” he asks, knowing damn well I do. And yes, he’s cocky as fuck, but… he’s not wrong.

“Yes,” I mumble.

“Good girl,” and at that I clench around nothing. And he does not fail to notice.

“Aww, my sweet girl likes being a good girl,” he observes, languidly running a knuckle through my folds. I gasp, and he chuckles. “Easy.”

He surprises me by thrusting one finger in- and like he said, it wouldn’t do much with how wet I was. So he gives me a second, and I start to feel it, especially when he hits my g-spot on every languid thrust, eliciting tinny moans from me. The tinny moans get louder when he starts scissoring his fingers inside of me, opening me up as far as he sees fit. “Gotta get you ready for me,” he explains, spitting on his other hand before brining his thumb to my clit. I’m beyond fucked once the rough pad of his thumb meets my sensitive bud, gasping his name and arching my back.

“You’re taking ‘em so well, sweet girl. Gonna give you another,” he tells me before adding a third finger and rubbing on my clit even faster. I barely last three minutes of this before I come for the second-third?- time with a weak cry of his name, still ready for more. I’m flustered from how easy it was to make me come, and his words certainly don’t soothe my blush.

“Oh, look at this pretty pussy gushin’ f’me, she’s too good to me,” he groans, slowly thrusting his fingers in and out to prolong my bliss. “Aww sweet girl, why’re you embarrassed, huh? I think my new favorite color is pink cause of your sweet cheeks. My pretty girl, my perfect girl.”

My mind is so fuzzy. Ben- Soldier Boy- is literally praising me whereas he calls anyone else a disappointment or a whore. And he’s making me feel so good, not only because of the incredible sex but with the way he’s treating me.

He kisses me again before he stands up, and I can taste myself on him. I don’t mind though, because his lips, his tongue… I can hardly account for my senses, much less comprehend the taste of myself. He stares at me and finally takes the waistband of his sweatpants in his hands. I can’t help the way my jaw drops as he finally pulls them and his boxers down, and naturally he gives me his signature smirk.

The bottom line is that he’s even bigger than I had thought earlier. Like, this is a size I thought only dildos came in, not the real thing. It’s long, it’s thick, and it’s rock hard. His eyes are trained on mine, so naturally he catches me gaping and laughs. Jackass.

“You know that not all of that is going to fit, right?” I ask, a little nervous.

“We’ll see about that,” he says, cocksure. I can’t help but gulp involuntarily, but once he brings his lips back down to mine I’m right back into my whipped frenzy, pouting and following his lips like a puppy when he pulls away, rummaging in his bedside drawer but talking all the while.

“Don’t worry, m’gonna give you what you want, just gotta ease you into it, okay? Ain’t gonna treat you like a loosened whore, I could never. My sweet girl. Didn’t bring you in here for nothing, wanted this.” He holds up a small bottle, and that’s when I get it. He needed the damn lube. That’s why he wanted to come back here. Not a big connection, but for someone who’s ready to let him doin all sorts of unspeakable things to her and thank him for it, it’s a revolutionary revelation.

“Oh-oh,” I say, my voice breaking when I watch him fist himself a few times.

“Gonna make it feel so good for you,” he mumbles, rubbing a generous amount of lube up and down his length. As if it hasn’t already been beyond good. “Tell you what, baby, I want you to ride me, just to start. Y’can adjust on your own time, take it as slow as you need, okay sweet girl? ‘Cause if I’m on top… I don’t think I can make any promises.” At least he’s honest. The horny part of me wants him to just go ahead and rail me within an inch of my life, but the small, annoying, rational part of me recognizes how huge he is. He sits down next to me on the bed, comfortably resting against the pilos and the headboard. His legs are splayed, showing off the endearing curve to them.

It takes a lot out of my already fucked out self to move two inches and straddle him, but I do. He smiles, genuinely smiles, and I can’t help but smile back.

“Take it easy, sweet girl,” he tells me. “We’ve got all night. You just take all the time you need.” I’m so turned on by how sweet he is, I genuinely can’t even help it.

“Okay,” I mumble, reaching for his cock, feeling it in my hands. It’s just a little thicker than the grip of one of my hands- definitely thicker than anything I’ve ever had, but not as scary as I thought. I rub the leaking precum over his tip, because even though he’s already poured a more than generous amount of lube on himself I can’t be too sure. Not to mention the delicious gasps he’s making at every touch are enough to just do this for the next six hours.

But finally, finally I’m ready. I position myself over it, my arms encircling Ben’s wide, freckled shoulders.

And then I slowly, ever so slowly sink down on the tip. We both moan at the newfound sensation, and I physically have to stop for a second. He’s just so big. All of him is, from his ego to his overall stature, but inside me? He’s huge, and the stretch is beyond satiating.

“You okay, sweets?” he asks, recovering quicker than me.

“Yeah,” I whisper.

“Good girl,” he kisses me on the lips. The distraction of the kiss lets me move more comfortably down his length. I make it a little bit more before I have to stop again. “You’re squeezing me so good, this pussy was made for me,” he groans when I stop, and I hide my own noises into the crook of his shoulder.

“Ben?” I mumble.

“Yeah?”

“I need help,” I whine, keeping my face hidden to hide my embarrassment.

“Aww, sweetpea,” he lets out a small laugh despite himself, furthering my angry red blush. “C’mere, look at me,” I do as he says, my thighs sore from keeping me up as I do so.

“No need to be embarrassed with me, sugar,” he says softly, before bring my lips to his, a big hand cupping the side of my head. I barely notice his other hand on my hip until he slowly starts guiding me down on him, lifting me up and down where I’m and pushing me down further and further as he does so. He muffles my whimpers and whines into the kiss, kissing me so long that I forget what it’s like to breathe.

Once he’s bottomed out and I’m properly seated on his lap does he pull away, letting me moan as loud as I need to.

“How do you feel?” he asks, his own voice strained.

“Full,” I mumble, because it’s true. He’s so all consuming in this moment, all I can concentrate on is how he fills me to the brim.

He twitches inside of me at that, his brow furrowed.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“Nothin’ baby, you just can’t be throwing around words like that,” he groans.

“You asked,” I protest.

“I know,” he retorts, kissing me again. After a few moments of sitting there on his lap, I tell him I’m ready to move a little.

“You need help, sweets?” he asks, giving me a knowing look. And I want to say no, that much is probably written on my face. Want to show him that I’m capable of bouncing on his enormous cock, but I sincerely don’t think I am.

“Maybe,” I concede sheepishly.

“That’s okay, baby,” he smiles gently, grabbing me by the hips. He slowly lifts me up his length, and I can feel my walls trying to contract around him as he moves me up, clenching him like a vice. A soft groan leaves his lips whilst various whimpers leave mine.

He keeps this gentle pace, so slow that I can feel every single inch of him slide in and slip out. Slowly the burn from the initial stretch disipates into pure pleasure that leaves me whispering his name every time he bottoms out. But eventually it’s not enough, because the thoughts of his promises creep into my empty mind, his promises of fucking me. Until I cry, until I can only remember his name and nothing else.

“Ben,” I mumble, my head still resting in the crook of his neck as he eases me up and down. “I’m ready.”

“Ready for what, pretty girl?”

Jackass. He knows damn well what, I can hear it in his voice. “I don’t want to say it,” I whine. He pulls me back so we’re eye to eye, resting me on his lap.

“I think you’re gonna have to,” he’s grinning ear to ear.

I pout, my hands resting on his chest.

“C’mon baby,” he prods, thumbing my lower lip. I take his thumb into my mouth, sucking on it. It clearly takes a lot out of him to take his finger out of my mouth, he seems to be turned on by the action.

“Fine. I want you to fuck me,” I tell him, crossing my arms.

“You’re lucky I like you so much. If anyone else were acting this bratty with me I think I’d have to teach them a lesson,” he smirks, the cocky promise clear in his eyes. Before I can retort he slips out of me, and I whine at the emptiness. I don’t like it.

Thankfully I don’t have to wait long because he lays me down, resting over me in a plank just as he was when we were “sparring.”

“Y’trust me?” His thumb comes up to meet my pulse point, his other fingers grazing across the bitten flesh of the juncture of my neck and shoulder, creating the most delicious sting. I nod frantically. “Words, baby.”

“Yes,” I whisper. His presses down barely a fraction harder, and yet it’s already enough to set me off even while being empty.

“I need you to promise me something, gorgeous,” he says, making the most intense eye contact I’ve ever seen from him.

“Okay,” I whisper.

“If you need me to stop, you tell me, okay?” His eyes are slightly wide, indicating how important to him this is. It’s easy to say: “Okay,” he has all of my trust. I kiss him for good measure, and we’re back. Fireworks gone off again halfway through as I take initiative to deepen the kiss before he can. But it doesn’t matter, because he’s stronger and so all consuming, and before I know it my mind is blank again. Blank and wanting one thing: him.

He gets up and I whine, not wanting him away from him. “Miss me already? My clingy girl,” he says affectionately, grabbing a pillow and putting it under my hips, kissing my stomach.

Settling above me once again, he lifts my legs up so that my ankles are resting on his shoulders, nearly bending me in half. But I let him, I’ll be as malleable ad he needs me to be if it’ll help him deliver on those promises.

“You sure you want this, sweets? Last chance to back out,” he tells me. I can’t believe he has the audacity to let the thought of me wanting to back out cross his mind. I’ve never wanted anyone more than I want him.

“I’m so sure. Fuck me, please,” I tell him. This is the strongest my voice has been this far, and I think he gets the memo.

“As you wish,” he grins, before sheathing himself in me in one go. I scream his name, but the noise is cut off by all air leaving my body as he thrusts into me at a literal superhuman pace. The sounds are ungodly, with every thrust a broken moan and the occasional grunt from him. He finds my g-spot with ease, slamming into it with every thrust ad he pounds me into his mattress.

“You sounds so pretty, maybe we should look into making one of those Internet videos.” I moan at the idea. I didn’t think starring in a porno would be my thing until he and his transatlantic 1950s accent suggested it.

“Yeah, everyone would want a piece of this pussy. But she’s all mine,” those last three words are punctuated with particularly hard, possessive thrusts that leave me gasping his name.

He brings his hand up to my throat once more, and the moment his thumb grazes my pulse point as it did before I realize just how much I want to come. “You like that, huh. Such a good girl,” I clench around him as he presses light pressure to my throat, and even though he’s not even done anything with my clit and it’s been maybe two minutes I’m coming hard and all-consumingly. It washes over me in waves that match Ben’s pace, seemingly getting more intense as he keeps fucking me.

“Oh sweetheart, you look so gorgeous when you make a mess of my dick. I’m hopin’ to see that five more times before the end of the night,” he tells me, but I barely hear him, too engulfed in my pleasure. He somehow adjusts the pillow under me while continuing his incessant pace and his grip on my throat and the new angle has me crying from how good it is.

“Aww, what’s the matter sweets?” he coos, knowing damn well what the matter is. It’s just too good.

“You’re so deep,” I sob, unable to gain my bearings because of how full I feel.

“Don’t I know it,” he groans, going impossibly harder. Eventually he takes his hand from my throat, and I whine, until he brings it down to my clit.

“Make it a good one, beautiful,” he winks with a click of his tongue before skillfully rubbing circles into my sensitive bud.

“Ben, it’s too much-,” I protest, but all it takes is a few more circles and I’m coming undone around him again. I’m both hyperaware of my tears soaking my face and the burn from the position of my legs but also on the verge of unconsciousness with how good it all feels. My legs are quivering around him but he doesn’t seem to mind.

“You’re okay, sweet girl, taking it so well,” he mumbles against my lips, kissing away my tears. I’d never had a lay so good that the guy had to reassure me that I was okay because I was shaking and crying uncontrollably from just how good it was. But then again, prior to tonight, I’d never had a lay with Ben.

He quickly brings me to the edge again, his fingers fast on my clit and his thrusts deeper than ever. When I come I can’t say his name, I can’t say much of anything because my mind is blank. Fuzzy, syrupy, I feel almost soft while the only noises I can make are little whimpers as he just keeps going. And I fucking love it.

“‘m gonna come,” he warns, and I muster enough of my bearings to tell him ‘please.’ He gladly obliges, coming with a loud grunt of my name, bottoming out so far inside me that he may damn well be in my cervix. I can feel it leaking out of me, and even in my fucked out stupor I can remember to moan. It’s the hottest feeling I’ve ever felt. He slowly pulls out then, gently easing my legs down.

I look up at him with questioning eyes, wondering why he doesn’t go for another three like he was planning to.

“Don’t want to break you on the first night, sugar,” he says, sweetly cupping my face in his hands. “I know you don’t feel it right now but you’re gonna be real sore in a couple hours.”

I pout, unsure of how to react to that. My legs are still shaking and while I do feel tired I’m still turned on.

Okay, maybe there’s dull ache.

“Oh, don’t pout. There’s other nights, and I’m gonna take care of you,” he smiles softly.

“Okay,” I whisper, finally regaining enough sense to talk.

He leans down to kiss me, softly this time. I melt into the kiss, and that’s when I realize: I don’t just want Ben. I think the feelings might be deeper. Maybe I… love? him.

But hey. There’s other nights.

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As a bonus, cause I love y’all: if we can get 250 notes on this post by the end of the poll time then I will do a spicy soldier boy fic with whichever of these gets the most votes. If we can somehow get to 400 I’ll do the top two! No kink shaming, okay? 🥹🎀

In the meantime, if you want more Soldier Boy try Taming the Supe!! <3

For fans of Big Sky!Jensen, part two of 2SC (aka my favorite project thus far) should be coming out next!

And don’t forget, asks/requests/thoughts/thots are always open!!

[procyonloser]

Adam kicked a rock with one of his new hooves, hating how it felt against the hoof - dull, but still there. Kind of like him. A fucking cow demon. He sure as fuck didn't sign onto that shit, and he was pretty sure it was at least 95% Lucifer's fault that he looked like this. That he sounded like this, unable to speak besides...mooing.

Vaggie told him it suited him, to have lived a life only valuing what women could do for him, what women could give to him, to be turned into a cow.

Adam called her a stuck up dumb cunt with one stupid eye. It came out as a long angry moo, and she simply laughed in his face and walked away.

He had to get out of that fucking hotel as often as he could. It hurt his brain to be in there, to hear the songs, the little trust exercises, the crying, god Charlie cried so much. Adam had to get away, but Pentagram city was just as depressing as the rest of Hell. Violent criminals, weird sex shit, badly spelled billboards advertising hired assassins. Gross, Adam thought to himself, hopping over a puddle of... He didn't want to think about it too hard.

"Hey big boy, you want to be branded?" A demon leered at him, leaning against a car on the sidewalk. There was another demon inside it that blinked multiple eyes up at Adam, raking down his body. Adam was not into it, this wasn't adoring fans in Heaven talking about how awesome he was.

He felt like, well, a piece of meat.

"Hey, come on, I think you'd look great with a nose ring, maybe a little bell collar." The demon laughed, pushing away from the car and following Adam along the sidewalk. Adam's tail flicked him, trying to keep him away, his powers were mostly gone now, he had typical sinner strength, and he didn't want to get into a fight only being able to say moo.

"Excuse you, sir!" A voice boomed with pomp and circumstance, descending from on high. Lucifer floated down from the sky above, angelic wings flapping lightly as he landed, hands on his hips like a wanna be Superman.

"This cow, I mean sinner, is my friend Adam! I will not allow you to speak to him in such a manner." Lucifer said, and Adam wanted to throw him off of a window. Where was any of this care in the last fucking ten thousand years?

"... Who the shit are you?" The demon asked, blinking repeatedly. "Some weirdo with an angel kink?"

"No!" Lucifer snarled, eyes briefly turning gold before he smiled politely. "I am Lucifer Morningstar, your King."

The demon looked unimpressed. "Sure you are, anyway, I was just telling your cow he'd look better with a piercing, maybe a brand of my name on his fat ass. Or maybe, nipple rings, yeah? That'd be hot."

Lucifer's horns began to push out of his skull, and Adam looked curiously between him and the demon. He'd actually enjoy seeing Lucifer rip him to shreds.

"How dare you speak about him in such a way, do you not know to whom you are addressing - Adam, the son of Earth, the first man, you vile- wait did you say nipple rings?" Lucifers tone shifted from one that rocked the very ground itself to curiosity. Lucifer swiveled to stare at Adam, gaze stopping directly on his chest. "Mm... Hmm..."

Adam blinked, looking at the demon, who was also confused.

"Moo!" Adam huffed, stomping his hoof. Lucifer snapped out of it and obliterated the catcalling demon into dust with a snap, before blinking and wincing.

"Oopsiedoopsie, I told Charlie I wouldn't do that anymore. Uh, he'll reform I think. It's fine. Anyway, you want to go home? I was just out, flying to the store. I think we need some....milk...." Lucifers brain seemed to stop functioning again as he stared at Adam again.

".....Moo?!" Adam yelled.

This truly was hell.

[officialfoxsquadron]

Luke Skywalker NSFW Alphabet

Writing exercise complete! Here's some headcanons revolving around this NSFW alphabet meme. Just smutty, horny thoughts under the cut. Generally throughout the Original Trilogy with a gender neutral reader!

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

No matter the era, Luke is incredibly sweet after sex. He’s always happy to clean you up and prefers, if he can, spending lots of time kissing and cuddling afterwards. I honestly think the aftercare would be one of his favorite parts, just spending time with his loved one and falling asleep together.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite body part is his eyes. I think he’s not really prone to much vanity, but sometimes he does look at himself in the mirror and think “Huh. They really ARE blue.” And you KNOW once he gets the ESB arms he is like wow…wish my dad didn’t cut off my hand…because my arms look so damn good right now…the true tragedy.

I have posted about Luke being attracted to thighs, but I also am firmly in the “Luke is a tits/chest man” camp. It’s just true! Sorry!

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically)

First of all shout out to the community for canonizing for me that Luke cums an absurd amount b/c…yes. His preference would be to cum inside of you, but he also loves to cum on your stomach and just see how much of it there is. He’d also be really into cumming in your mouth and tasting it afterwards.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He is interested in exploring pain as pleasure, both giving and receiving. But he wouldn’t do it without a trusted partner and a lot of talk beforehand. Otherwise he’s pretty open about his fantasies.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

I mean, oh my god. I think this depends on the timeline. A New Hope Luke has very little experience beyond making out, I think. But he would be very eager to learn. ESB Luke? Has at least fucked a few times and is just generally more knowledgeable. ROTJ Luke and beyond? It does not matter whether or not he is experienced, the man can read your thoughts so he’ll probably do fine.

F = Favorite Position

He likes anything really intimate. He loves missionary, but also really loves spooning you and the access it gives him to your body. He also looooves you on top - he’s able to really look at you, feel you, even change it into a sitting position and make out.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Again, this depends. He definitely can be, and I think he’d be able to laugh about any awkwardness or silly mishaps. He’s also really playful, and would love play fights or tickling that turns into more. But, I also think he can get pretty intense at times, especially during the act and right before he cums.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He tries to keep things neat, but he’s not too concerned with it. His hair is a little darker, and he has a small happy trail from his belly button. 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Okay this is a big one. I think the intimacy of sex is the most important thing for him. Given his connection to the Force, sex is just as much of an intense mental experience as it is physical. So all this to say, he is very romantic, making sure his partner is happy, giving them as much pleasure as he can. He always, always, always would want to cum simultaneously or very close together.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

So I headcanon Luke as on the ace spectrum (demisexual), so this headcanon definitely relates to that.

I think he’d occasionally masturbate, but it’s not like he feels he NEEDS to. Especially in the Rebellion, if he ever gets a moment alone, I feel like he would just be thinking, “Oh, nice, I can jack off now! Great!” And then just...not think of it again for four more weeks because he’s so damn busy.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Man is never beating the praise kink allegations, sorry! He loves being told how amazing he’s doing and how well he’s pleasing you.

I think he’d be really into overstimulation? The idea of upping the intensity of pleasure, chasing multiple orgasms…yeah he’d love it. 

I also headcanon him as a switch, and he’d love taking control sometimes. But he’d also love you in control, making him beg–especially during ROTJ and beyond. He is so in control of his feelings and finally started to work out this whole Jedi thing-he’d love a partner who can ease him into losing control for once.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

A little boring, but given his history, he would be so excited to make love in a big, plush bed. He’s so used to sleeping in bunks, on the literal ground, or on his ship, so he thinks it’s the most romantic thing ever. Any time he is near a body of water or has a real shower, he also wants to take some time there together-even if it’s just to make out or cuddle (but lbrh, it always ends in sex.) Also, despite the logistical nightmare, you definitely fuck in his X-Wing at least once.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Adrenaline is a huge one! Anytime he’s working out or fighting, he’d get turned on easily. He’d like sparring or training with his sexual partner. And as much as he likes to tease his partner, he loves being teased in return. Especially if you’re newly dating, he would get flustered very, very easily by the minimum amount of flirting.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Definitely not into choking for obvious reasons, same with being called daddy. I also don’t think he’d do something involving non-consent.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Luke loves giving oral! He could spend hours pleasing his partner, drawing multiple orgasms out of them. He loves to receive too-loves wrapping his hands in his hair, and especially loves if you let him fuck your mouth.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He prefers to go slow and really take his time. Time is such a luxury to him, so pretty much any time he can draw things out he will. That being said, he doesn’t mind something more rough and passionate, especially if it’s been a while since he’s seen you.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He’d be down, especially if your schedules are busy and as a younger man, when his passion tends to run hot.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He definitely loves to experiment! He’s probably not super knowledgeable (personally I think Tatooine was pretty sexually conservative, as rural areas tend to be.) But as soon as he’s with someone he trusts, it’s like a flip switches.

Hmm. In terms of risks, I mean…this is the guy who took one look at the Death Star trench run and was like “oh this is easy.” So he’d definitely be down for a few risks (something semi-public or with the danger of getting caught) but I don’t think he’d go crazy.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

As a younger man, he can definitely go for a few rounds. During ANH/ESB he sometimes finishes a little faster than he intends (sorry Luke!) but eventually, his patience grows. ROTJ and beyond, though-it’s pretty much the exact opposite. He has a ton of patience that he uses to tease you. 

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

I think he’s willing to experiment! He might not immediately think of it but with a partner who’s interested, sure. I don’t think he owns any toys.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Luke is such a tease. He has so much fun drawing out the experience for his partner and getting them worked up. I have this headcanon of him just whispering the most insanely horny things to a partner in semi-public settings and..yeah he 100% would!

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Luke is also not beating the vocal heacanons, sorry! He will whine and beg, like he can get pathetic. But there’s also times where he’s surprisingly calm and quiet, just staring at you or panting softly, completely lost in the moment.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon)

LET’S TALK ABOUT INAPPROPRIATE USE OF THE FORCE.

Especially pre-Jedi Training, there will be some moments where he would accidentally use the Force during sex. It wouldn’t be conscious but like, let’s say he’s gripping a headboard and he’d accidentally grip it a little too hard? Or right after both of you finish, in the hazy afterglow, he’d reach for a towel and it would just..float into his hand.

ROTJ and beyond, he would be very very cool with using the Force for your pleasure, but only with explicit permission. (He’s a Consent King, what can I say.)

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

I still maintain Luke is packing, given some of the ahem EVIDENCE we have throughout Mark’s career. Also, he’s uncut. He’s long with some girth, but nothing disproportionate.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Hm. So I headcanon Luke as demisexual so I’d say it depends. If he doesn’t have a partner his sex drive is pretty low. But if he has a partner, oh LORD. I think he’d want to be having sex literally all the time. Especially if you just started sleeping together. You would need 3-5 business days of just fucking together before he’s satisfied. He’d be so excited to just explore with a new partner!

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) 

Especially after an intense session, he can fall asleep pretty quickly! But he at least wants to clean you up and make sure you’re alright before he knocks out for the night. He just feels really pleasantly sleepy afterwards.

[chokepoet]

Kittens & Perverts (PG-13)

GIF by @kitherondale

Summary | A month after Logan’s passing, Roman stumbles onto an abandoned kitten and seeks the help of his assistant in caring for it.

Genre | Angst, The Fluffiest Fluff

TW | animal sickness, mentions of death (no actual death), panic attacks, drug mentions, slight allusions to an eating disorder

Word Count | 3.9k

A/N | This is for all my soft hearted bitches that just need that doe eyed lil’ shit to feel held. Even if just by a hand.

I had just walked out my door when I received a call from a very frantic Roman.

“I found a kitten. What the fuck do I do? It’s like, fuckin’ shivering and oh god- I think it? Coughed? Do cats cough?” His voice gets slightly quieter as if pulled away from the receiver. “Did you just cough?”

After having me find, in his words, the Mayo Clinic of emergency vets, he sent a car after me to meet him there. The entire drive was spent trying to calm him through the phone. He kept sending me horrific screenshots of every worse case scenario he found on Google. When I entered the waiting room I found him pacing with wide eyes and fidgety hands. He’d wound himself onto the verge of a panic attack.

“It’s got fucking pneumonia. Hooked up to IV’s and all this shit. They’re like incubating it- I think? With this big ass oxygen tank. Did you know they did that for cats? Like iron lung ‘em?” His hand roughly drags back through his hair. “I dunno if some sick fuck just left it there ‘cause it was ugly as shit with lil green goo comin’ out its eyes- aw, man, you shoulda seen it. The poor little fucker was like- like straight outta Cronenberg’s wet dreams, just- oh man, fuckin’ nasty.” He laughs to himself but it’s more of a stuttering rush of mirthless air. “And I’m supposed to feed it with these like freaky fucking heroin needle things apparently? I don’t-“ Placing both of my palms on either side of his cheeks gently, I tried stilling him.

“Hey- hey look at me. Breathe with me, yeah? In through your nose for a count of 4, hold for 7, out through your mouth for 8. Just like your blowing out birthday candles.” Face bunched up, he shoves me away.

“Fuck off! Birthday candles? The fuck are you on about? I’m fine. You know whose not fine? The fucking cat! It’s so tiny and-“

“Roman! Just fucking breathe with me real quick, okay? Just for a sec-“

“What the actual fuck is wrong with you? I’m breathing fucking fine! Are you deranged?“

“No I’m not fucking deranged but I’m about to shove a vial of ketamine up your ass if you don’t just fucking trust me and breathe with me.”

Exacerbated, he finally follows me through the breathing exercise for three rounds. Albeit while rolling his eyes. The tension in his face had fallen slightly. Though, his shoulders remained tense as ever.

“Better?”

“Fuck you.” He shakes his head and refuses to meet my eyes. “Yes.” His reply reluctant and slightly cartoonish with annoyance. He’d been having bouts of anxiety and panic attacks ever since his father passed. He was always like this whenever I’d guide him through it. Embarrassed and frustrated. Depleted.

He sank into one of the seats lining the wall with a long sigh. Head falling back for a moment before pulling his knees up and anchoring his heel to the edge of the metal chair. Hugging himself. I take a seat next to him and criss-cross my legs beneath me.

“Is he gonna die?” His voice now small and hushed as he intently stared at a floor tile. I felt the ghost of Logan grip my heart and squeeze.

“Honestly?” His big brown eyes flicker up at me. Searching, scared. “I dunno, Roman.” He quickly stares back to the floor tile. “What I do know is you did the very best you could for the lil’ guy.” He scuffs.

“Yeah-well, my best has historically done fuck all so…” he mumbles and I gently nudge him with my elbow but he doesn’t look up.

“That’s not true and you know it.” He shoots me a look that tells me he does not in fact know it. “That kitten wouldn’t have had a chance without you. You gave it a fighting shot at life, Rome. That’s worth something.” Just then a vet walks through the waiting room doors. Roman quickly stumbles out of the chair to stand. I join him and cautiously press the palm of my hand to his back for support. He doesn’t brush me off.

“It’s a good thing you brought him in when you did. If it had been any later, I don’t think he would have made it.” I steal a glance at Roman, who swallows before clenching his jaw. “He seems to be responding well to the oxygen and antibiotics. You all should be able leave with him after he’s been stable for a little while longer. I’ll start filling the scripts for his medications here soon.”

The warmth of the vet’s reassuring smile was in stark contrast to the color draining from Roman’s face. He nods slowly and blinks as he processes the responsibility of this kitten’s health being placed onto him. As the doctor leaves, Roman climbs back into the cold metal chair like an anxious gargoyle. I pull the vet aside before he can walk back through the doors and ask him to go over care instructions with me. He offers me a packet instead. Flipping through it, I search out a supplies list.

I knew Roman was far too out of his depths to retain any of the information. Valid, considering he referred to a nursing syringe as a heroine needle. Upon walking back, I find he’s made the full transformation into human stress ball. Full moon be damned. He looked like one pull of an imaginary rubber band and he’d fall apart all over the floor.

“Hey, I’m going to run to the store and get everything we need. I’ll set it all up at your place so we’ll be ready when you come home.” I tried using we instead of you to let him know he wasn’t going to be tackling this alone. I don’t think he noticed.

“You’re leaving me here?” His eyes were wide and horrified. “I can’t- I don’t- what if-“

“You’ll be okay Roman. You’ve got thi-“

“Like hell I’ll be! I most certainly do not got this. What the fuck!” Sighing, I sit beside him as he continues to gape at me.

“The vet has everything under control. All you need to do is sit here, try to relax, and think about a name for the little guy, okay? You don’t wanna have to deal with shopping for all this shit once you have him.” The lines between his brows were deeply creased.

“Can’t you just send a-“

“Roman. Stop.” He does, though a silent plea remained etched in his features. “Just let me do this for you, alright?” His eyes shut as his head falls back against the wall. This was important and I didn’t really trust that anyone else would get everything needed. Having to deal with a forgotten item later tonight sounded like a hell I wished to avoid. “You’ll see me again at the apartment. My phone is at full volume. You know you can call me the second I leave this building and I’ll answer.” He grumbles, refusing to look at me. “And I promise to have that boba tea you refuse to admit you like waiting for you.” One eye opens and the corner of his mouth twitches.

“Sugar-free?” He didn’t need to know that the boba had been soaking in brown sugar before reaching his cup. Too elated that he felt some sense of joy in something food related and knowing full well he’d never touch it again if he knew. He still rarely allowed himself a cup of it as is, let alone finish it all. I didn’t have the heart to break it to him, so I never did.

“With extra boba.” His lips defy him as a small smile escapes. Groaning loudly and dramatically, he lifts his head.

“Fine.” He jerks his wallet out of his pocket and hands me his black card. “If that thing fucking croaks on me while you’re gone, I’m blaming you.”

As I walk out the doors I catch a quick glance back to find him, eyes closed, doing those breathing exercise.

Sure enough, the second I’m in the car my phone rings.

“The fuck all do you even have to get? Do pet stores sell heroine needles? Ask Kendall, I bet he’d fuckin’ know.” The entire shopping excursion was spent with the phone cradled between my ear and shoulder as I picked up supplies. As soon as one call would end, it wouldn’t be a few minutes later that it’d ring again. “Do I have a humidifier? I’ve got that fuckin’ facial steamer. Is that like the same thing? I feel like- no, you know what? Just pick one up while you’re out. Someone on Reddit said it helps with pneumonia.”

Upon arriving to his apartment, I open the fridge to sit the promised boba tea inside. Lonely amongst the near barren shelves of wilting lettuce and protein shakes. Trying not to think about it too much, I return to the task at hand. I had successfully gathered all needed supplies, plus a plush heated blanket that I hoped might warm both their spirits. He rarely left his room most days so I figured it’s the best place to set up everything. As I spread the blanket across his bed, my phone rang.

“In route with Jerry.”

“The fuck you doin’ with Gerri?”

“Check your texts.” Clicking the notification, I’m met with a photo of Roman and the kitten. It’s small form curled up under the palm of his hand, nuzzled into the crook of his neck.

“That’s the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.” His chuckle reverbs through the speaker.

“He is kinda cute, right?” You’re both kinda cute.

“The cutest. Please tell me you named him after the cartoon and not that Gerri?”

“Of course I named it after the fucking cartoon. Why would you even- yeah. I named a fuckin’ kitten after Waystar’s legal counsel.” His voice dripping with sarcasm even though he totally did do just that.

“You fucking would.” I can’t help but laugh. “And you say I’m deranged?”

“Yeah, yeah. Call my therapist.”

“Why? You’re already on the phone with ‘em.”

“Well you’re doing a shit job.”

“Clearly.” I began setting up Jerry’s bed. A nest of soft blankets over a heating pad in a small box. “Well shit’s hard with a sick fuck like Roman Roy as my client.”

“I can tell ya somethin’ else that’s hard.”

“I’m calling HR.”

“Ooo, three way?”

“Hanging up now.” His laughter reflects off his floor to ceiling windows as I cut the line.

While finishing filling the humidifier, now resting on his side table, I heard the front door open. Roman’s light footsteps click across the pristine hardwood floors.

“Aye! Lil’ man’s hungry, did you get the goods?” I’m soon enough greeted by a softly mewing Jerry in the same spot as he was photographed in nearly an hour prior.

“Yeah, your boba’s in the fridge.” Roman rolls his eyes before scrunching his nose up and sticking his tongue out at me.

“Hardy-har har. You’re hilarious.” Sticking my own tongue out at him, I give him a wink. “Seriously, did you get- the fuck that come from?” He waves a limp wrist towards the bed.

“It’s a heated blanket, I got it while I was out. Just thought you two could use it. And yes, the formulas in the kitchen.” Roman eyes the thick white blanket before waltzing over to run a hand over it. His lips threaten a smile but he fights it off.

“It’s… nice.” He clears his throat.

“You know, I haven’t gotten to officially meet Jerry yet.” Tilting my head, I gaze upon the little creature with a small smile. A tabby that reminded me of my first cat. I carefully reach out my pointer finger to stroke his head. My smile grows even wider. I was grateful Roman had found him and that he was okay. The fist of worry I kept hidden in the pit of my stomach began to unfurl. My cheeks warm as Roman’s gaze studied my face while I pet the kitten held against him.

“You can hold him.” Our eyes meet and there was something in his that made my chest flutter. He looks down quickly. “I mean-if you wanna or whatever.”

“Yeah? You sure? Y’all seem pretty cozy.” Roman rolls his eyes before carefully handing Jerry over to me. I cradle him over my heart while rubbing his side with my thumb. I can’t help but lean down to lay a soft kiss atop his head. “You are just the sweetest lil thing in the whole world, you know that?” I murmur into his fur before pulling back with a smile.

“Oh he fuckin’ knows it. He had all the nurses in a tizzy. Had to fight ‘em off with my humongous dick.”

“Oh Jesus, Roman. Do you ever just shut the fuck up?”

“Nope.” Roman smiles as he reaches to pet Jerry. His finger brushes my hand and our eyes fall to one another. The corner of his mouth twitches along with his finger. The air begins to fill with static as we stood falling into each other’s gaze. There was maybe half a foot of space between us. Out of nervous habit, I bite my bottom lip and Roman’s eyes immediately flicker to my mouth. Jerry mews against my chest.

“Should we go get the formula ready?” My voice comes out quieter than I intended, just above a whisper. He blinks a few times before meeting my eyes again.

“Huh? Y-yeah.” Clearing his throat, he quickly turns on his heels and heads out the bedroom door. I follow with a blush on my cheeks and a smile on my lips.

Atop Roman’s bed, he lay on his side with me mirrored beside him. Jerry was stretched out between us with a full belly pressed to the heated blanket, sleeping peacefully. Roman had one hand propping his head up and the other holding his boba tea. My arms were crossed under one another as I used them as a pillow. Both of us watching the rise and fall of Jerry’s breathing.

Feeding him earlier was an ordeal to say the least. Roman quickly became overwhelmed. Only confident in his abilities as a fuck up. He was twitchy, anxious, and swear-y as he made a mess of the kitchen. Glancing up to his face, I notice the circles under his eyes seemed darker. He looked utterly exhausted as he chewed on the straw of his drink with a furrowed brow.

“Hey, Rome?”

“Mm?” He hums addressing me but doesn’t look up from Jerry.

“Do you wanna try and get some sleep? I can stay up with Jer-Bear and make sure he’s okay.” Eyes finally meeting mine, his brows stay pulled together.

“Fuck no. I’m not tired.” He lied through his teeth; quickly and firmly. I had just seen him yawn not five minutes prior. My brows raise.

“Uh-huh…” I look him over. He was still dressed for the day, though without shoes. His tie, dusted in formula powder, hung loose around his neck. His sleeves were rolled to his elbow. Once gelled hair now flung in nearly every direction.

“Hey! Stop fuckin’-“ He waves the plastic cup around. “Checkin’ me out in front of the child, ya heathen.”

“The child?” I laugh quietly while propping my head up in one hand and stealing his drink from him with the other. He gasps dramatically with a hand to his chest. “Alright, cat daddy.” His brows raise as I take a sip.

“Cat daddy?” He smirks suggestively. “What are you then? Cat mommy?” Chewing on some boba pearls, I shrug with a smile.

“Seems fitting.” He goes to steal his cup back, causing his hand to fall over my own. He doesn’t remove it. Just stares at them clasped together. His touch feels electric. The familiar static returning to the air. Roman’s thumb slowly begins to brush my knuckles. Back and forth, almost shyly. I let out a shaky breath and his eyes suddenly meet mine, startled. He pulls the drink from me and I let my hand fall. The phantom of his thumb sending small shockwaves through to my bones.

Refusing to meet my eyes, he focuses them on Jerry instead. His fingers quickly and rhythmically tapping at the side of his cup. The hand once holding his head was now scratching at his jaw. A bundle of nerves before me. I yearned to soothe them and missed the warmth of his touch. The lonely ache blossoming throughout the skin of my palm made my head feel fuzzy. I then feel my last remaining brain cell sprout something akin to courage. Reaching out, I grasp the top of his drink and take it away to place on the side table behind me.

“What the fuck? I wasn’t finished…” He trails off as I look back to him. All furrow browed and handsome. Cautiously, I reach for his hand and lace my fingers with his. His eyes immediately drop to them interlocking with a sharp inhale. He falls tense. My stomach flips as I fight off the flaming arrows of nerves shooting down my arm. Just as tentatively as he had before, I start to gently rub my thumb against the side of his hand. He doesn’t respond; his hand feeling limp and dead beneath mine. Dread pools down the back of my throat.

“S-sorry.” Pulling back, I try to unthread myself from his hand. Suddenly his fingers come to life and clasp around mine. Gripping tightly as if his body was silently pleading with mine to not let go. Don’t leave. His eyes finally meet mine and his brows twitch. A wash of different emotions flash across his features. Behind those stormy brown eyes, I could see the waves of doubt and fear threaten to drown out the rest.

What we were doing could be considered small. Insignificant even, sure. We were simply holding hands. Yet it felt like something big for some reason. Maybe because neither one of us could recall the last time someone held us. Even if it was just our hands.

It felt intimate.

He didn’t want it to stop but he didn’t know what to do with the feelings it was bringing up either. I pull our hands towards my face and lean forward to meet them. Softly biting down on his middle knuckle then smiling up at him. His mouth twitches before slowly smiling back.

“You’re so fucking dumb.” He laughs softly, slightly bewildered.

“Watch it or I’ll bite it off.” His smile only grows.

“Do it, I fuckin’ dare ya.” I bite down onto his knuckle once again, harder this time. He drops my hand immediately, only to thread his own through my hair and pull me into a bruising kiss. Both of us smile against the other’s mouth. He nips at my bottom lip when I pull away with a laugh. I lightly shove his head playfully before throwing his words from earlier back at him.

“In front of the child?” The near constant and crushing weight of his stress seemed momentarily absent as we giggled in bed like schoolchildren. “Ya heathen.” Jerry had continued sleeping soundly between us. Careful not to wake him, Roman begins brushing a finger down Jerry’s back, ever so gently. “You can be really sweet when you wanna be, you know that?” His eyes meet mine in an attempt to look stern. Though, the smallest hint of a smile still lingered.

“You tell anyone about this and I’m chuckin’ ya into the Hudson with cement shoes.” With a wide grin, I return to my earlier positioning. Arms curled beneath me to lie atop. The day was finally catching up and my head felt heavy. “You realize there’s pillows directly above you, right?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’ve never seen a pillow a day in my life.” My eyes were struggling to stay open as I watch the rhythmic rise and fall of Jerry’s back with Roman’s finger stroking gently.

“Smartass.” The next thing I know, Roman’s hand has slid beneath my cheek to lift my head. A pillow is nestled into the space between soon after. I hum approvingly and he mumbles. “Thanks… for today.”

“Happy to help.” I rub my face into the pillow as if it could wipe off the sleep threatening to overtake me. In a weak attempt to stay awake, my mouth begins to ramble. “I got pneumonia a lot when I was a kid. I’d have to take these breathing treatments with an oxygen mask.” Letting out a soft chuckle, the memories flood back to me. Absentmindedly, my finger begins drawing circles against the blanket as I sleepily look to Jerry’s face. “But since I was a child, they tried to make it less scary so the mask was in the shape of a fish head. Whenever Jerry was in the hospital, I just pictured this tiny kitten wearing my little fish mask.” My eyes flicker up to Roman. He was wearing a small smile. “I dunno… it just made me feel better for some reason. I guess like he’d be okay because I was okay.” As the words tumbled out in a mumble, Roman’s eyes seemed softer. My cheeks started to warm with a blush so I shyly tuck my chin in and look back to Jerry.

“That’s really cute actually.” My eyes rise back to his. The tips of his own cheeks seem to turn almost pink under my gaze. “Corny as fuck, but… cute.” Clearing his throat, he looks back at the sleeping kitten before him. “I’m calling you fish face from now on.” The corner of my mouth tugs into a smile as my eyes fall heavy with sleep.

“You did good today, Rome.” If I had the energy to look back to him, I would have caught the pinks of his cheeks turning crimson. Saw his mouth twitch in a losing battle between a smile and his lips. The smile won.

The blinding light of morning had me waking with eyes squeezed tight. A steady electric hum met my ears and I tried to mentally deduce where it could be coming from before giving up. Fighting off the violently bright assault to my vision, my eyes finally part and focus. A cloud of steam billows through a sun ray to greet me. My gaze follows the plume towards it’s source. A soft electric hum. The humidifier.

The next sight to greet me fills my heart with something so sweet and so warm, it overflowed. The feeling overwhelmed my every being and threatened to burst through my chest and coat the very walls. Taking its disembodied hands to pull the corners of my lips upwards as a soft snore escapes the sleeping form beside me.

Roman looked even messier than he had the previous night. Lying on his back with one wrinkled sleeve pulled down. It appeared to have milk dampening the expensive fabric. The formula powder, once just on his tie, was now kissing across the scruff of his jaw. Somehow, it looked to be in his hair as well. His shirt lie halfway open, unbuttoned. A tiny ball of fur lay against the bare skin at the heart of his chest. There, Jerry slept underneath Roman’s cradling palm. The two of them warming the other peacefully.

My cheeks were aching but I couldn’t stop smiling. The humidifier’s buzz seemed to morph into a familiar high strung murmur inside my head.

You fucking love me, don’t you?Dumbass.

I haven’t written fan fiction in ages, let alone for Succession. I’m high-key fucking terrified of the response lol But this was so much fun to write and turned out extremely wholesome so I had to share. Please excuse any spelling/grammar/formatting fuck ups. I did all this in my notes app and haven’t shared any writing on here since like… 2018? I think?? Anyways, to whomever might be reading this, I really hope you enjoyed it. ♡˚ ✧ ༘ ｡ ˚ ⋆

[glitchtricks94]

Senseless

Inguro Obanai and Giyuu Tomioka Sometimes, your love gets carried away and makes you lose all coherent thought. However, after a hard day, it's the least they can do, taking out all your thoughts and replacing them with all their love. This request was made by my dear friend, @desi-the-blue-eyed-kakushi, I hope you enjoy your men! Obanai my beloved Anyways, kick back, relax, mind the banner rule, and enjoy~ -Glitchtricks

Giyuu always knew if something was wrong with you. His quiet nature made him more observant, especially regarding his beloved lotus blossom. Your shoulders were sagging when you drudged through the door, a detail barely perceived before you forced yourself to perk up as you spotted your love approaching you. He noticed the saddened sparkle in your eye, the same he carried for a long time. Forcing a smile, you greeted him, a sharp pain shooting through his heart seeing you try to force yourself to put on a façade to try and hide your pain from him. He didn't want that. He wanted you to trust him to see everything, know everything. It upset him seeing you try and pull yourself away like this. "My love." Giyuu spoke, his voice as soft as a babbling brook. "I can see the sadness in your eyes. Do you want to tell me what's wrong?" You let your mask fall, looking at the ground as you shook your head. He enveloped you in a warm embrace, you melted against him, the scent of irises and freshly washed linen enveloping your senses. Giyuu always loved to soothe you like this. Giyuu was more than willing to help you forget your pain, too. You ended up confiding that you honestly just wanted to forget the world and all that happened to you that day, your beloved nodding in understanding as he took your hand and led you to the bedroom. That felt like hours ago. You were currently laying on your back with Giyuu's cock buried snuggly inside your cunt, moans being dragged out from your parted lips. Giyuu was putting his everything into his movements, your hands pinned to either side of your head by his own, fingers intertwined. He loved this feeling of intimacy, being able to stare down at your face, your body. Seeing the two of you connected in such ways made him feel like he was flying, and it always did wonders for making you focus on him and him alone.

"G-Giyuu! O-oh, fuck, Giyuu- Ah!" You cried out, squealing as the water hashira continued to plunge his cock into you, his tip pressing against your sweet spot relentlessly. "M-my lily, y-you- Shit- You feel so good...S-squeezing ne so tight, s-sucking me back in-Ah! Oh, gods I can't get enough of you..." Giyuu panted, leaning down and pressing his lips to yours, a muffled groan leaving him as you came, the man above you still pressing forward, intending on fucking you until you could only feel the pleasure he gave you, feel the love he held so deeply for you. He needed you to know. Giyuu only wanted you to know of him and his cock for the night, nothing else should be in your pretty head. Not while he has you wrapped around him so deliciously. He flipped you over onto your stomach, pulling your hips up so you presented to him with your ass in the air, the hashira thrusting back into you, somehow reaching deeper than before, whines and cries of delight flooding from your lips. You felt your mind go blank, pleasure being all you could feel, all you could register.

Obanai considered his keen eyes and ability to read others one of his crown jewels of strengths. His protective nature tended to add an extra edge to his skill, and he often exercised it on either the newest weaklings to see if they even had potential, which to him, most do not, and on you, his beloved. You were the serpent of his heart, the thrum of a heartbeat in his very soul. You gifted him the ability to feel as if he was normal and not some monster born of tarnished flesh. He always felt so safe in your care, in your warmth, like a snake sunning itself on a stone. You were his sun, he was your moon. One can only imagine the fury he carried when he saw you arrive home with tear stains tainting your cheeks, eyes red and puffy from crying. "And just who did this to you now, my sun?" The serpent hashira asked, his voice low and dripping with pure malice. His heterochromatic eyes softened when you reached out to him, taking his wrist in your hand. Kaburamaru instantly slithered down from your lover's shoulder, moving to coil gently around your arm. It was his form of a hug. "N-no one, Obanai...I just...it's been a rough day, and I don't wanna talk about it...I'd rather just forget." You sighed softly, your lover humming for a moment, Kaburamaru taking the hint and returning to Obanai's shoulders as the raven haired man led you to your shared bedroom, making sure to place his beloved companion in his own terrarium like cage, the albino serpent swiftly getting comfortable and falling asleep. "So, just to clarify, you wanted to forget, correct?" Obanai spoke, his voice soft, and gaze softer as he looked at you. You nodded, the man before you reaching up to remove his bandages. "Are you willing to try something? I have a plan, but I need input on your end." "I trust you with my life, my moon. I'm willing to try anything you want." You replied, Obanai appearing pleased by this response. "Good. Wait for me on the futon. I recently acquired something I think you would enjoy." He ordered, you following without question as he got to his feet, disappearing from the room for a brief moment. When Obanai returned, his bandages were gone, his scars on display for you to see and a strip of silk cloth patterned with red spider lilies rested in his hands. "I thought we could try blindfolding you." He spoke softly, seemingly amused by how wide your eyes had gotten before he approached you, kneeling down before you. "Do you trust me?" You always did, you told him, your voice hushed yet filled with excitement as he carefully wrapped the silk strip over your face... Obanai's hands felt as if they were everywhere; your hips, your legs, your chest, your stomach, no inch of skin was left untouched by his delicate and calloused fingers. He relished in every soft whine and honey sweet moan you let out. It was all simply magical to him. "Yes, that's it, my sun, lose yourself in this pleasure." Obanai hummed, dragging his palm all the way down from the valley of your breasts to your pussy, which was simply dripping with your need. He knew what you wanted, and instead of making you beg, he'd give you mercy. "H-hah! Obanai!" You moaned out, feeling your lover circling his fingers over your clit, sending jolts of pleasure zipping up and down your spine. You squirmed beneath him, the serpent hashira grinning with sadistic delight at your struggles. "And how does this feel, dear serpent of my heart?" "L-like- Oh! Like- mmmnnn- L-like you're d-driving me crazy....Oh fuck, p-please don't stop, d-don't!" You whined, your lover soon sliding his middle and ring fingers down to your weeping entrance, pressing them in with ease. You felt your mind go blank from the sudden intrusion, instantly screaming as your orgasm snuck up on you when he curled his fingers inside you. "Oh, you've cum already." Obanai cooed, his eyes dancing across your flushed form. "I hope you aren't too tired, we're only just beginning."

[captain-mj]

Can you please make part 2 to why konig wears a hood...

What if he finds about horangi being aware of his past job👀

(NSFW)

They fuck in this one also König can have a little confidence as a treat

Also shout out to my friend Els for helping me with the German

König and Horangi had been captured. How... embarrassing.

Luckily, it was just by SpecGru and this was a game for training, but that only made it more embarrassing.

Horangi was listening to König and Alejandro talk about religion. How they got on the topic was beyond Horangi. And Rodolfo too if his expression was anything to go off of.

Alejandro and König had both grown up catholic apparently. Horangi had grown up nonreligious and outside of a couple of shows he watched, he barely knew anything about it.

Well. He knew quite a bit about the story of David. After he had found the first video, he had looked up the name to find more. At the time, he had completely discarded it to focus on find more videos of the porn star, he had completely ignored it so that he could continue.... anyway. He had returned to it later. That was the end of his knowledge on religion.

"What's your favorite story?" König asked Alejandro.

"The story of Isaac and Abraham. Or Samson."

"Isaac. That's a good one about trusting God."

"Yeah. I think about it a lot. The fear he must've felt while being taken up the mountain." Alejandro sighed.

König glanced at Horangi in distress but he got himself into the mess. He could get himself out of it.

"So what's yours?"

König frowned. "Uh... English... Um... The... König...."

"King David?" Horangi answered immediately. König looked at him to thank him but they locked eyes and he saw it. The dawning realization. Horangi had told him before he knew nothing about Christianity.

"Why do you know about that one?"

Well, why not. "Used to watch a..." he let the pause grow just a moment, to the other two, it probably looked like he was trying to find the English word, none of them were native speakers, it was a reasonable thought, but König knew better. "Content creator. He went by the name." Even with the mask on, Horangi knew he was bright red under there.

"Ah... I see... Yes. I like his stories..." König went rather quiet after that. Horangi noticed the way he fidgeted and maybe felt a tiny bit bad.

The training exercise ended and König almost fled from him. Horangi didn't mind. He stayed true to his name and stalked him silently. His prey was fast. Long legs making his strides a little hard to keep up with. But Horangi didn't mind.

Only when they were alone, did he reveal himself. "König."

König swung around so fast he worried he'd get whiplash.

"You can't tell anyone. No one can know."

Horangi stared at him for a moment longer.

"I only did it because I needed money in between deployments. My country is different so it was easy money and I only did it be-"

"König. I'm not going to tell anyone. I wouldn't do that to you."

König relaxed immediately, though he was still fidgeting his hands. "How did you find out?"

"I recognized you."

"How?"

Horangi did not think through us. "Uh... I..." His turn to get flustered.

"Did you... watch those videos?" König stared at him. "Watched me."

"Just saw the thumbnail."

"You recognized the name. You know nothing about the bible and you wouldn't know anything unless you looked it up." König stepped forward and Horangi recognized it from those videos. "When?"

"Before we met."

"Enjoy yourself?"

Horangi backed up, finding it a little hard to breath.

"Where did all your confidence go Morder Kätzchen?" His back hit the wall and he felt trapped.

"I did. Enjoy myself I mean. I watched a ton of your videos." All of them. He had watched all of them.

König hummed. "What did you think about? Did you want to be me in those videos?"

"No. I wanted to be the other men." König grabbed his chin and made him tilt his head back.

"Oh?"

Horangi flushed and tried to shy away. He was never like this! This stupid fucking man may be big and tall but Horangi was a confide-

König put his thighs between his legs and fit his hand around his throat exactly like he did in those videos and Horangi felt weak. He immediately rutted against his thighs.

"You wanted me to do this to you?"

Horangi panted softly against his chest. "Please... Want you to treat me like you did them." König's thigh pressed right against him through his pants.

"Ah." König leaned down, whispering something in German that had Horangi rutting against him. He laughed when he noticed but he started to pull away. Horangi hit his shoulder rather hard.

"König. Fuck. Me." He hissed it out like an order.

König glanced down at him before tugging his mask off. He then tugged Horangi's off too. "Gorgeous." He traced Horangi's scars.

Horangi flushed more, trying to escape his gaze while still raking his eyes over his face. König was incredibly handsome. A little older, but that was no problem for him. He had gained a few scars that Horangi wanted to memorize.

König picked him up and his legs wrapped around waist immediately. He peeled his gloves off to run them through König's hair. Their mouths met at some point and Horangi felt himself melt in his arms. His hands scrambled at his back, wanting more.

If only 19 year old him who just found these videos knew where he'd be now.

König dropped him onto his bed, thinking for a second. "I have lube but I don't have a condom. Do you want me to pull out?" He didn't touch him while he talked, clearly wanting Horangi to focus on the question.

"No." Horangi ignored the heat he felt as he flushed all over. "You can finish inside me." Shame filled his chest and he had to look away.

"Wie schüchtern." König purred and Horangi couldn't piece together what that meant. Then his hands were on him, undressing him gently. Horangi tried to help but he was pushed back down. "I got you. Just lay back."

Horangi flushed more, closing his eyes as cold air touched his skin. "Don't comment on my scars. No compliments, no insults, no "they're not that bad"s. Nothing."

"Understood." König mouthed against his throat and he immediately tugged at his hair. His hands grabbed his waist, his fingers brushing against each other from how big they were compared to him.

Horangi started to yank at König's clothes, wanting them off already. König got the hint and leaned back, shedding his clothing. He put himself firmly between Horangi's legs, grabbing him under his knee and pinning that leg to his chest while shoving his other leg to the side. It left him exposed to the fingers currently trying to push in to him. At some point, König had coated his fingers in lube and Horangi hadn't even noticed.

One of his fingers reached into him, the stretch making him tighten his grip.

"Ever?"

"Yes. Just... not in a while." Horangi hadn't had sex since he had been in Korea before he even joined the military. He'd blame his horny behavior on the drought he'd been having. "Come on, I can take it. Hurry up."

König tapped under his chin to make him tilt his head up so he could kiss him. Horangi could focus a lot better on this kiss, trying to pay attention to that and not the burn of his fingers. More lube was added and it wasn't quite as bad, though it was still not quite pleasant.

He must've noticed his discomfort because he pushed deeper, curling his fingers.

"ah, careful! Your hands ar-" Horangi shut up when König pressed right against his prostate.

"There." He kept pressing it as he worked him open. Horangi put his arm over his eyes to hide his face. He tried to be quiet but König twisted his fingers and he couldn't fight down the whimper. "Come on, tiger. Be as loud as you want. No one will hear you but me."

Horangi panted softly but tried to stay quiet still.

König pulled his hand away and pinned both his knees to his chest, Horangi's ankles ending up almost over König's shoulders. He grabbed Horangi's hands, pinning those down to so he couldn't cover his face.

Horangi ended up screaming, suddenly understanding why the other people in the videos did. The position made it a bit easier, but he was still very big and even with the prep it hurt. König stopped immediately, kissing along his jaw and gently rocking until he relaxed enough for him to push into him again.

Horangi squeezed his hands hard and clenched his eyes closed. He felt König start to pause. "Please don't stop."

König continued to kiss his face gently as he bottomed out. It felt like he was in his goddamn ribs. Horangi tilted his head so their lips would connect again, enjoying the soft sensation. Eventually, he felt more adjusted and mumbled against his mouth. "Keep going."

König nodded and rolled his hips gently, dragging a broken moan out of his chest. It felt so good. So intense but it was König and Horangi knew he wouldn't hurt him.

Horangi lost all coherent thought the moment König started to thrust into him. He knew the exact angles to drive him insane and despite trying his best, Horangi started to sob underneath him, overwhelmed with his legs shaking. Pleasure shot up his spine with every thrust and he held on to König.

König started to whisper to him in German. "meine Hure", "Ich liebe dich" and "meine mieze" were one of the few Horangi could really string together, even though he couldn't understand what it meant.

He started to respond in Korean. Things that were easier to admit if the person didn't know what you're saying. "I've admired you since we met", "I want to climb you like a tree" and "you're giving me special treatment, you dog".

They kept kissing and his orgasm was very much impending. The pressure building in his core.

"Du gehörst nur mir." König started to mutter to him and Horangi started to beg incoherently. He felt König lift up just a little and he looked down, seeing that even through all the muscle, his tummy still dented from König's size. "Look at you..." His hand fit perfectly around Horangi's throat as he thrust in hard. He grinned, tongue darting out to lick his lips.

Horangi came all over himself, eyes filling with tears. For a moment, he felt like he couldn't breath. A warm feeling coated his insides as König came, holding him to his chest. He mouthed against his throat and held on to him, legs wrapping back around him now that he was no longer being pinned.

They laid there for a minute before König shifted them. Horangi hadn't even noticed him balancing his weight on to the bed and not on top of him. He adjusted them so Horangi laid on top of him, safe on his chest.

"Everything you fantasized about?"

Horangi clenched at the raspy tone he used, hearing him groan a little. "Shut up."

"Never thought you'd be this shy in bed."

Horangi huffed at him before closing his eyes and getting comfy. It took a minute before it him. "You've thought of me in bed?"

"Quite a bit, yes." König played with Horangi's hair, running his fingers through it a few times.

"Ah... Is David your actual name?"

"No. It's Leon."

"I like that name." Horangi said sleepily. "Do you still like bondage?"

König turned red down to his chest. "I'll show you some time."

"Can't wait."

[youremyheaven]

https://www.tumblr.com/youremyheaven/757046870112681984/httpswwwtumblrcomyouremyheaven75703907683788?source=share 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭ohh my god really my college boys are so immature 😫😫 that's why they treat my freinds like this btw your 24 are you pursuing you master's or job really i am studying in college and intrested in vedic ans stuff but bruhh i hate my college boys they are just 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 we all need a responsible man just like him hope i find one can you tell what your experience in first relationship and firt time in ✨️it ( if you not comfortable don't tell just need some advice) AND FOR YOU I AM MANIFESTING THAT GUY AS YOUR HUSBAND

Cheek dapat dam dam chuu swaha ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️ heaven giel get this guy as husband with more greatness 👏

😭😭😭🥹🥹🥹🥺🥺🥺you're SOOOO SWEET, pura ka pura cutie pie <333

i graduated already and im just working at the moment. i dont really feel like studying further tbh lmao and im entering an industry where work exp matters more than degrees so✌🏻

and yes college boys will always be shitty, dont lose hope, after college you'll meet better guys!!! <3 and the thing is dudes under 25 are just little boys,, veryyyy few of them are mature and this guy is the rare exception

NSFW CONTENT MINORS DNI

my first time was when i was 16-17 and the guy was 18 and a major asshole and he forced me to "date" him and then he r*ped me 🤡🤡🤡so i technically lost my virginity to r*pe but i dont want to think about that or consider that as my first time

i had my first "real" boyfriend in 12th grade and on Farewell day (its like the Indian version of Prom for all of you non-desis) he took me to his house and no one was home so we banged hehe<3333 he had a huge dick and it hurt and im pretty sure the whole thing did not fit lmao

i feel like a lot of virgins dont understand this but (and this also depends on the guy's penis size) penises dont often go all the way in when you're having sex for the first time!! and it takes a while for your punani to stretch comfortably and "take" d*ck. ALWAYS USE LUBE, the more lubricated you are down there, the easier it will be to take him in. your partner should be understanding and considerate of the fact that penetration is a physically painful experience initially and they should do whatever they can to make it less so.

that said, penetration SHOULD NOT HURT after the first few times, it SHOULD feel good. you dont have to be waxed bare down there or anything, obviously its nice to be groomed but its okay to have a little hair (or a full bush, thats up to you but i feel like first impressions matter so i like to keep it trimmed hehe, ik a lot of feminists are going to be like 😠😠no i wont shave for a man😠😠 but honestly he's shaving his balls for me and id feel a bit awkward if he was veryyy hairy down there so i get it and dont mind grooming in return<33)

sex should be enjoyable for both parties??? and remember real life is not porn!! he's not going to last for 6 hours and neither do you want him to because being pounded into for more than like 10 mins is annoying tbh and you'd just wish he'd come asap ,,, remember that sex is like physical exercise so u get tired after a while,, the whole "fuck all night" stuff is rare and mostly happens in movies lmao,, as long as you have time with them, you can go multiple rounds but feeling tired is real asf

ALWAYS USE PROTECTION, they might try to pull the "my dick is too big for these local condoms/it doesnt feel good with condoms" etc excuses BUT TRUST ME THOSE ARE LIES,, just USE PROTECTION

in india, we have something called an "i-pill" (morning after pill for non desis) and its less than 100 bucks at the medical store. no one will ask you anything for getting it, they usually dont care so dont hesitate!!! its better if the guy can get it for you and if your guy wont even buy you an i-pill then should you even be having sex with him????

there are side effects to taking the i-pill, your period may be late/have heavy flow/irregular bleeding, or you can experience nausea/dizziness etc after taking it. thankfully i have no symptoms and it feels normal ish but exercise CAUTION!!!

put a pillow under your back when you have sex, it helps make it hurt less!! bc your back is supported.

always clean up after you have sex!! go take a shower, gargle your mouth, make sure you dont have any of his cum near your kitty because semen will find its way inside you in mysterious ways 💀💀

STAY SAFE, HAVE FUN <333

AYYYYY 😭😭😭idk about husband stuff yet but I do hope my future husband is just as attentive, caring, considerate, loving, warm and kind as him

but u are soooo sweet MWAH MWAH

love,

Heaven

[mylifeisjustafeverdream]

A Retelling of My Mind Whilst Reading Shadow Kissed-

Omg it's the Sixth Sense up in this bitch

Bitch when are you ever "just tired" when weird shit starts happening to you, I swear to fuck.

Rose is so me because I too would rather die than spend an extended amount of time with my best friends boyfriend.

Eddie Castile the man that you are.

From the bottom of my heart I hope Jesse gets his shit rocked.

Omg Rose girl do something, ANYTHING. YOU'RE EMBARRASSING US.

Least Favorite Trope: Entire plot would be resolved if this dumbass just like communicated the issues she is having OMFG.

If Rose Hathaway has no haters all her teachers must be dead because wtf is their issue???

Homegirl is unstable at best.

I feel like at this point she should probably go to where Mason the Friendly Ghost is pointing.

Girly-pop that's not a migraine....

I do not fucking trust that bitch Tatianna

*Viktor explains master plan* "Cool motive still murder"

*Law and Order sounds*

HE JUST SAID THAT SHIT IN OPEN COURT IT'S ON THE RECORD

How much of an asshole do you have to be that it's more believable that you're lying than a crime having actually happened lol

Lissa is so clueless it's kinda funny.

You know what I hope Rose fucks Adrienne and gets pregnant just to spite Tatianna.

She wants her nails done omg she's just a girl 🥺

*starts looking at my tarot book to see if this is accurate*

I love when Dimitri starts lore dropping to Rose

Well.... I think they know about the ghosts now.

That doctor is the only rational adult at the school cause literally why tf didn't she talk to a counselor.

Her therapist just clocked her so hard.

Well that's an unfortunate fact about Shadow Kissed Anna

Dimitri took part in that attack exercise specifically so she would hop on it lmao

Can't even celebrate for a moment before Lissa is off doing something dumb I swear to god

Lissa try not to get tortured challenge go

*New power unlocked*

YES ROSE BEAT HIS ASS GIRL......oh shit.....GIRL YOU GOT HIM IT'S GOOD.

She's like a feral cat.... Dimitri should use a spray bottle.

Oh my GOD IT'S HAPPENING EVERYONE REMAIN FUCKING CALM

Girl you gotta give me more details than that PLEASE

"My body ached" that'll happen when your first time is with a 6'7 Russian built like a tank

CAN WE NOT HAVE ONE GOD DAMN MOMENT OF PEACE

Girl I'm gonna throw up he's all alone out there.

CHRISTIAN OZERA THE MAN THAT YOU ARE

HE DIDN'T DIE THANK FUCK

Mason upstaging Dimitri even from the afterlife that's my man right there.

SECRET TUNNELS, SECRET TUNNELS THROUGH THE MOUNTAINS

The uncanny ability that 17 year old female herions have to radicalize societies is amazing

Do y'all think Dimitri came up with that life plan while he was fighting the strigoi?

"You're scared of my mother" um yea girl she's fs going to catch an attempted murder charge once she finds out.

*Clenched my jaw so tight during the cave fight it started to hurt*

Oh my God girl stop internal monologuing about how everything is going to work out THAT ALWAYS GOES POORLY

Oh God it's that blonde bitch from earlier this is going to be so much worse than him being dead.

Rose: *literally tries to throw herself back into a vicious attack just to save Dimitri's body*

Everyone Else: She just respected him as a teacher so much there's no other possible explanation.

Lissa clocking what was happening with Rose and Dimitri just now is like when someone steals the answer on Wheel of Fortune after the other contestant mispronounced the phrase

*Knows it's definitely going to happen* "Dimitri is a strigoi"*gasps*

I'm shocked they didn't grab like a single Guardian teacher to try and talk down Rose like why tf did they think Kirova would have any affect.

I know it's not malicious on Lissa's part but I'm glad Rose is finally speaking about how one sided this relationship is.

"Off to kill the man I love" oh this next book is going to fuck me up.

[theseeingfawn]

Summary:

The infamous Shadowsinger finally reveals himself to the new gang in town, sending shockwaves through the criminal undergrounf. Meanwhile, Elain struggles to come to terms with her growing desires. As tensions rise, Azriel and Elain embark on a charged first date, unable to resist giving in to their powerful mutual attraction.

Elain

Why is it the moment you know you can't have something that's suddenly all you can think about? Last night, after Azriel left, I spent the rest of the evening in a daze. I washed the tea set we had used so many times I ran out of soap. I decided to binge watch Peaky Blinder but had no idea what was happening. I tried to take a bath but the one thing the water couldn’t cleanse were the dirty words Azriel had said in his deep shadowy voice. Gods the way he looked at me, somehow touching me without using his hands. No matter what I tried, I couldn’t stop thinking of him. His words echoing in my mind, playing on repeat. No fucking. No fucking. No fucking.

My body felt like a live wire of restless energy with no outlet. It took me hours to fall asleep. HOURS. 

When I  finally managed to drift off, I dreamt of him. He was doing the very thing he said he wouldn't. 

Now it’s morning and I’m barely awake floating between dreamland and reality. My skin is flush, my clothes feeling too restrictive. A part of me thinks he planned it. He seems devious in that way. Like he’s playing some reverse sex mind games on me and godsdamn him it’s working. 

The sound of my phone going off reminds me that I have to return to the real world. It’s Cerridwen begging to let her in the shop. In my panicked daze I throw together an outfit that doesn't make me want to die from heat exhaustion. I rush down the stairs and let her in. She whistles, “damn girl, you're looking hot.” I squint my eyes at her, “Why is it so hot in here? Is my AC broken?” 

She looks at me with concern, “it's a normal temperature, what has gotten into you? Oh shit, do you have a fever?” She slaps her hand onto my forehead. “Nah, you feel fine. But maybe you are fighting something? Do you know anyone who's sick?” I nod and mutter, “Azriel.”

“What did you say?”

I don't bother responding, I just head straight into the walk-in freezer for some relief.

-----------------------------------

“I’m telling you, it's a crime wave.” I hear Pauline shouting all the way from the kitchen. It's the morning rush when the townsfolk come in for their coffee and pasties. My shop is the first business open on Main Street and everyone, and I mean everyone , comes here before the day gets started. That's why I am scrambling from one end of the kitchen to the other preparing and finishing up orders. Usually I work up front but I'm not feeling up to socializing, despite the three shots of espresso I've had. I'm grateful I opted for less clothing today, with the heat of the ovens and me running back and forth, I am liquid fire. 

Cerridwen pops her head in looking flustered, “are you finished with those orders? I'm dying out here.” Cerridwen and her twin sister Nuala are my best friends and coworkers. They help me run the bakery. Sometimes, they even run it without me so I can take time off here and there. They’re the only people I trust to take care of my baby. So, when one of them says they need help, I know all hell has broken loose. “Let me plate these quiches and I'll be right out.” I finish up my task and carefully balance five plates on my forearms and hands. When I step out of the kitchen, I see what Cerr meant. It's standing room only and there is barely any standing room.

“I'm telling you Lucien, first Gabriel was streaking and now Lainey’s got her tits and ass out.” I nearly drop my plates. Thankfully, Cerr is there to lighten my load and help me out. Lucien has his back to me and gently pats Pauline on the arm, “Now Pauline, I told you Azriel was just running. It's not unusual for a man to take his shirt off while exercising. Besides, that is why we have the citizens watch.” Pauline huffs, “that's what I'm trying to tell you Lucien, our citizen watch has a report on Lainey.” I sit my plates down at their respective tables and walk up to Pauline. 

“What the hell Pauline?” She gasps like we’re on a soap opera, “Lainey, don't you run that potty mouth around me. Look at you dressed like a harlot and cursing like a sailor, what is happening in Hewn Hills?” 

Lucien looks me over, utterly bored. I glare at him until he turns his head away. “It's called a mini skirt Pauline,” I deadpan. She scoffs, “Well, Lucien, what are you going to do about it?” I cross my arms and look at him, “Yeah Lucien, what are you going to do about it?” I'm in no mood to humor the citizens watch today. I'm cranky, hot and out of fucks to give. Azriel has given me  permission to be bad, and after my terrible night of sleep, I’m more than willing to embrace the dark side. Lucien sputters, “well I… you see… Look Pauline, Elain isn't dressed like a harlot. So, I don't see an issue here.” She narrows her eyes at him, “Not like a harlot? She's all sexed up!” I hear Cerr snickering in the distance. The whole bakery goes quiet and turns toward us. Lucien looks me over one more time, “I don't think there's anything sexy about it.” 

Pauline guffaws, “I see what's happening here. It's like a boiled frog situation. You are so used to Elain's naked body you don't recognize when she's barely clothed.”

I feel my whole body shake with rage. Enough is enough . “Pauline, Lucien has never seen me naked. We are not in a relationship!” There is an awkward pause before Bob, the hardware store owner, says, “Didn't you two just go on a date?” 

Oh for the love of… how is my every move tracked by the people in this town. Lucien just stands there silent, not saying a word. It dawns on me that his unwillingness to speak up and clarify things has hurt me just as much as the gossip. All he has to do is set the record straight, say that we aren’t dating or he hasn’t seen me naked. Or heaven forbid I’m not required to date him. That I don't belong to him like I'm some sort of broodmare, but he doesn't. He is content with the status quo because it isn’t hurting him the way it’s hurting me . That spark of confidence, or maybe rage I felt earlier returns. “Lucien and I aren't dating. I'm… I’m seeing someone else.” I'm not exaggerating when I say the shock that filled the room was like a thunder clap. 

Before the town can scrape their jaws off the floor, I walk back to the kitchen and hide in the freezer. Not that I can escape the torrent of messages currently flooding my inbox.

Feyre: You're not dating Lucien? *read*

Nesta: Who is the mystery man I need to kill?! *read*

Cassian: Get it gurl! 🍑💦🍆 *read*

Rhys: Elain, Please respond to your sister. *unopened*

Hewn Hills Hussies group chat: 

Nu Nu: 🍾 girls night stat

Cerr: we need the deetz

*read*

Mr. Naked: Got something you want to tell me?

Elain: I didn't name drop I swear! I just panicked.

BUZZ. BUZZ. BUZZ

“Well … well… well if it isn't Mrs. Naked.” I groan. He laughs. I bang my head against a 20 lb sack of flour. “It’s not funny, I panicked Azriel, I couldn't handle the whole town thinking Lucien’s seen the goods.” He hums, “yes, they are clearly concerned for you.” I let out a long suffering sigh. 

I hear loud music and talking in the background, “Where are you?” 

“A bar.” 

I laugh nervously, “Why are you at a bar at 8 am? Why is a bar even open at 8 am?” 

The echo of pool sticks clanging fills the air, “I'm at work.” What kind of job does this man have?  

The image of him smiling wickedly as he said “bad things done extremely well” pops into my head. He rendered me speechless with those words, so much so that I forgot to press further. If he thinks I'm going to drop it he's delusional. I'm nosy and love a good secret. Nothing will keep me from finding out. But he doesn't need to know that. I can play the long game. 

“Well, your job seems a lot cooler than mine and I'm in a freezer.” 

“Why are you in the freezer if you're barely clothed, Mrs. Naked?” 

I groan pathetically, “I'm not naked Azriel, I'm wearing a mini skirt and a crop top.”

“And no bra.” 

I gasp. “What!?” I nervously look around. Does he have spies everywhere? Maybe he is James Bond. “How do you know that?” 

I can almost hear his smug smile. “Did you know there is a town discord?” I shake my head, the horror of my reality hitting me at full force. I let out a pathetic little, “No.” 

“Well there is and according to slimjim46 you're not wearing a bra. Sadly no pictures though.” 

What in the hell is going on?  

“Ughhh, how do you know about the town discord but I don't? And my chest is no one's business.” 

“It's my job to know these things and some might say it's your boyfriend's business.” Before I can respond he asks almost tenderly, “Do you need to give them my name so you come out of the freezer?” 

My stomach does a little flip. He's willing to take on the insanity that is this town for me and gods know what with his job. “That's sweet of you to offer but I need to woman up and clean up my own messes. Besides, it's more fun to leave them guessing.” 

I can hear his grin through the phone, “it's also the bad thing to do.” I agree and whisper, “so bad.” I swear I hear a groan before he says, “tell me Elain, what's got you so hot and bothered?” 

I roll my eyes, “who says I'm hot or bothered?” 

His voice dry and straight to the point, “you're currently hiding in a freezer and your teeth aren't chattering. Seems like something or someone has gotten under your skin.” The arrogance of this man is unbelievable but my gods is it a turn on. 

“Elain, I told you we can't fool around.” 

I let out a very unconvincing, “pfft that's not what's going on here.”

I sense his damn smug smile again, “Good, then you are ready for our first lesson in being bad.” I swear he pauses for dramatic effect, leaving me waiting on bated breath.

“I’m busy the next few days but I can take you out on our first date on Thursday night, if that works for you?” 

I pretend to think about it, “Yeah, I'm free.” 

“I’ll send you instructions, and Elain be sure you’re dressed to ride.”

-----------------------------------

It took me several minutes to realize what he meant by ride. Hello gutter, have you met my mind the last twelve hours? He meant a ride on his motorcycle… obviously. The problem is I don’t have any cool clothes for riding a motorcycle, but I know someone who does. I spend the rest of the day dodging questions at the bakery and avoiding my growing list of unanswered text messages and voicemails with the exception of one person… Nesta. 

She usually avoids me and everyone else for that matter unless she needs something. Which is why she attends Inner Circle dinners, Rhys and Feyre are bankrolling her life. I take a deep breath and text her…

Elain: Can I come over after work?

Nesta: 🙄 fine but you better tell me about your boyfriend. 

I worry my lip with my teeth. There is no way I am telling her about Azriel but as long as I can get my foot in the door, I can sweet talk my way into what I want. 

I change out of my skirt and throw on a pair of cut off shorts. I am still feeling overheated and decided to ride my bike over to Nesta’s place just so I can feel the wind in my hair. Her studio apartment is located in a less desirable area of Hewn Hills, which doesn’t mean much since the whole town is beautiful. What makes the area rough is the slightly overgrown lawns and the occasional abandoned vehicle. I knock on the door and wait for Nesta to answer. I hear the sound of empty cans and bottles being kicked around before the door cracks open. The light from outside reveals a sliver of one of Nesta’s cold gray eyes looking at me. She slides the chain off the rail and opens the door wider. 

Her apartment is littered with empty alcohol containers. It smells of spilled beer and stale sweat. I take a steadying breath, trying to remind myself that she doesn’t want my help, no matter how many times I offer or down right beg. That doesn’t mean I don’t bring her food when I can or find excuses to bump into her. She turns away and slinks back to the ratty used couch she found near a dumpster. She plops down and covers herself in a throw blanket before she barks, “What do you want?” 

I take an uneasy step inside before I say, “I came to see if I could borrow some clothes.” She eyes me suspiciously and nods her head toward the rack of clothes near the bed. I start to comb through my options when she asks curtly, “so, the boyfriend. Who is he?” 

I close my eyes and brace myself for the interrogation before the fight, “No one you know.” I hear her stand from the couch and approach me, “where did you meet him?” I avoid looking at her, “I met him in Velaris, after my failed date with Lucien.” It was close to the truth, I did see Azriel after my date with Lucien. The best lies always hold some truth to them. 

“Does he have a name?” I exhale sharply, “Yes, but as I said you wouldn’t know him.” My hands catch on a pair of black leather pants. They are dark and sleek, they remind me of Azriel. Not my usual style but that's why I'm here, to step out of my comfort zone. To break out of the box I've been in my whole life. Maybe I'm not the kind of girl who wears leather pants but I'll never know unless I try. I pull them off the hanger and ask Nesta if I can borrow them. She raises a sharp eyebrow at me, like she can’t quite believe what I am asking. “You want to wear those?” she says incredulously. “Yup,” is all I can manage. 

She scoffs, “They're a bit sexy for you, don’t you think?”

Before I can answer, she barrels ahead, “Do you need to impress this new boyfriend? Is he not into prim flower girls?” 

I cut my eyes to her, “Why do you care?” 

“I don’t. It just seems rather sad that you have to pretend to be dating someone. When are you going to grow a spine and tell Lucien to fuck off?”

I sigh and take a calming breath before I reply, “Lucien knows I'm not interested and I assure you, he is not interested in me.”I hate the way she makes me feel, like I need to answer to her, that she is the arbiter of my life. I try to remind myself that she is in a vulnerable place right now. What she needs from me is patience. T his is what Nesta does, she lashes out before anyone can hurt her. And I always have to be the bigger person, the kinder sister, the one willing to bend so nothing else breaks.

I remind myself that deep down Nesta is sensitive, she loves fiercely and that’s why she behaves the way she does, she is frightened. She hasn’t been the same since our fathers death. Despite her claims she hated him, she was deeply hurt by his years of neglect. She hasn’t truly healed. I’ve learned the hard way that there is no helping Nesta unless she wants to help herself. 

I settle on avoiding a confrontation that will lead nowhere, “Can I please borrow the pants? I promise to return them.” 

She sighs, “Fine.” 

I mutter a thank you and head for the door.  “Good luck with your fake boyfriend Elain, don’t come crying to me when it blows up in your face.” I’m two steps outside her front door when a lonely tear falls down my cheek. I take the small bag of groceries from the basket on my bike and I place it on her doorstep. I pull away and wait for her to open the door and take the food before I go home.

Azriel

I end my call with Elain and look at the photo that’s now saved in a secret folder hidden among the apps of my phone. I lied, there was a picture of Elain on discord and she’s wearing a skimpy little outfit, so far from her typical attire I’m surprised she owns such a thing. I, of course, tracked down the user who posted it and got his IP address. The background check is in the works and I fully plan to ruin his life. I take one long look at the picture before I block her from my mind for the next few hours. 

The email Devlon sent me yesterday included a report of a bar fight where an unregistered handgun was seized. One of the suspects was reportedly wearing a leather vest with a gang emblem associated with The Attors, a broken crown with three drops of blood. Hybern’s crew has officially made their move and now I can make mine. After I left Elain’s, I spent most of the night staking out the bar from the safe house. No gang members were spotted until this morning. One of the peculiar things I’ve noticed about this bar is that it never closes. A sign the Attors’ are up to no good. Which is why I am now sitting at the bar first thing in the morning waiting to strike. The code phrase worked at getting me inside but if the weary looks of the patrons are any indication, my presence is both noted and unwelcomed. I suppose they are not used to seeing people this early in the morning who aren’t a part of the “business.” I feel more than see a figure come to stand behind me. 

“Are you new to this area, friend?” I refuse to turn and look at him, if he wants to talk he can look me in the eye. Sensing my unwillingness to bow to his display of intimidation the man steps forward and sits beside me. I note the hint of an accent and the vest he’s wearing. I fight back the smug grin threatening to reveal itself. It’s go time.  

“No, but you are.” I note the barely perceptible tick of his jaw as he glares daggers at me. Clearly not used to losing the upper hand. The nervous bartender comes forward and places a wobbling glass of whiskey next to the Attor. I use this opportunity to pull my hand out and place it on the bar. The bartender stumbles back and mutters a curse.  A wave of awareness sweeps through the bar. The faint whisperings of Shadowsinger sound like screams in the now quiet bar. The scars on the back of my hand have become something of a signature. A grim calling card that not only echoes my fathers cruelty by my own reputation. I can feel the confidence of the man next to me slip, suddenly unsure of the situation he now finds himself in. 

“You are in my town, friend .” The throat of the Attor bobs in apprehension. “Let’s get acquainted, shall we?” I let myself smile, one I reserve for men like him and unsheath the dagger at my side. 

-----------------------------------

It takes an hour to scrub the blood off of my body. I am barely dressed before Devlon calls and congratulates me on a job well done. My little show at Amarantha’s has already sent a shock wave through the criminal underground that the Shadwosinger is back in Windhaven. “Lucky for you that your father’s legacy hasn’t faded in all of these years.” I don't respond. The only legacy my father left is fear. The same legacy I’m leaving behind. Devlon takes my silence as an incentive to keep talking, too often silence only breeds more drabble. “The local police called to beg for our help already, you should be proud.” I snort. “The local sheriff told me that organized crime has been down over the last few decades, it’s a good thing you showed up when you did.” I grunt like a brute because that’s exactly how I feel after the little display of violence at the bar. 

“Why Devlon, that almost sounds like praise.” 

”Yeah well, don’t let it go to your head, your ego is already over inflated.” 

I should feel proud but instead I just stare at my hands and feel shame. This is why I need to keep my relationship with Elain superficial. She can’t get close, I can’t expose her to this side of me. I tell myself I do the things I do for work to help make the world a better place. But the truth is I enjoy it. I like taking power and exerting control over someone. I like the sound of them pleading. Whether it’s because I was once weak and fragile I don’t not know. What I do know is Elain deserves better. I close my eyes. Rhys was right to be worried. To warn me away. But, I am a selfish bastard and I can’t keep away. 

Elain

The next few days pass in a blur. The rumor mill about who I’m dating was in full swing and I noticed more than a few people keeping a close eye on the bakery. Feyre calls several times but I let them all go to voicemail. I’m grateful she’s too wrapped up in Velaris to give me the full weight of her attention. 

I join Cerridwen and Nuala for a girls night where I tell them about my new boyfriend. I don’t give them Azriel’s name but I share what I can about him. Including the sex embargo he’s imposed. They listen intently, they don’t tease me or pressure me to reveal more information than I am comfortable with. That’s one of the things I love most about them, they meet me where I am and never demand more than I am capable of giving.

“He sounds like Jason Bourne or maybe a mafia don.” I nod, “That’s what I’ve been thinking!” Cerridwen pours a generous helping of margarita before plopping down on my couch. “Have you Googled him to see if you can find anything?” offers Nuala. “Of course I Googled him but he’s off the grid. Not even a social media profile.” They give each other knowing looks, “definitely a spy then.” 

Nuala giggles, “Wait, is that why you were so flustered the other morning?” I feel my cheeks start to heat, “umm… yeah, that was after the whole no fucking talk.” 

She thinks for a minute, “Maybe penis is broken?” I choke on my drink,“No, I don’t think it’s that.” They both take a minute to think it over before Cerridwen adds, “Maybe he’s afraid of intimacy, those strong brooding types always are.” That makes more sense than the broken penis thing. 

Nuala gives me a devious smile, “You should test him!” I glance at her confused, “test him?” She nods and sits her glass down, “you know, see how committed he is to abstaining. If you are this hot and bothered there is no way he is unphased.” 

“I don’t know he seems like the type of man who is unflappable. Besides I get the feeling he won’t like being pushed. He’s been more than kind so far, I want to respect his boundaries.” 

Cerridwen rolls her eyes, “Uh huh, aren’t you supposed to be bad?” I smile at her, “baby steps.” 

Nuala claps her hands excitedly, “I know what you need!” She reaches for her phone, fingers flying as she types. Nuala looks at Cerridwen. They do that creepy twin thing where they communicate without speaking and then say in unison, “vibrator.” 

“I’m not sure that’s what I need.” They both wave their hands dismissively, “Come on Elain, you are dating a hot man who refuses to dick you down. And you're too nice to test him on it. How else are you going to survive?” I pause for a second and realize they have a point. Before I can answer Nu ominous replies, “it’s done.” 

-----------------------------------

The next day, date day, I find a manilla envelope under my door. Inside is a note from Azriel addressed to me:

Elain,Meet me at the townhouse at 6 PM. Don’t deviate from the plan. 

-Azriel

Inside is a map with detailed instructions on how to walk to the townhouse without being detected. There are handwritten notes in the margins explaining which position is better and why. There are timestamps and coordinates. I half expected the note to self-destruct after I finished reading it. One thing's for certain the man is thorough which begs an intriguing question of what it would be like to kiss him. Noooope I’m not letting myself go there. 

I put on the leather pants and stare in the mirror. I feel a little bit like Sandy in Grease when she goes through her bad girl makeover in an attempt to win over Danny Zuko. But mostly I feel like I'm on the cusp of a fundamental shift. Like I'm finally becoming who I've always wanted to be. Someone bold, adventurous and willing to be a little dangerous. I trace the curve of my hip and a thrill shoots down my spine. I'm about to jump off a cliff leaving the old Elain behind. I'm going to embrace the side of me I've hidden away. The part of me that's clawing to be let out. 

I look over at the pink package that was delivered this morning. The vibrator Nuala ordered taunts me like it knows exactly what I’m thinking. But I can’t go there, not now. 

Inhaling long and hard, I focus on the plan. I’m to meet Azriel inside the townhouse garage. He claims he will orchestrate a diversion so that we can pull out of the garage on his motorcycle undetected. Listen, this is high stakes stuff. Even Jack Ryan would be sweating if he were faced with the potential of Pauline’s discovery on one of his missions. I might as well go on Instagram Live with it because everyone from here to Velaris will know that Azriel is my secret boyfriend before I even have time to ride his motorcycle.

I snake my way through trees and hedges just as Azriel instructed, clinging to the shadows. I ignore the weeds in Josie’s flower bed that need to be pulled and the whining of Bob’s hound dog begging for pets. I slink my way around corners and alleyways as I make my way to the townhouse. I spot the side door of Feyre’s garage. It’s left cracked just as he said it would be. Here’s the tricky part. I have to sneak in undetected. There is just one neighbor with a clear shot of the door. Azriel said to wait until exactly 5:55 pm. That’s when Sam, the town’s only accountant, will leave his home office for the rest of the day. I peek up to see his window is cracked and he’s on a business call. My cell says it’s now 5:56 and I start to panic. I’ve followed his instructions perfectly at this point. Should I just run for it? Do I not care if Sam see’s me sneak into my sister’s house? Before I make a decision I hear Sam end his call and the sound of his footsteps fading. I rush for the door and slam it shut behind me. A thrill runs through me, I feel dangerous, my blood pounding and my chest heaving. I’ve never felt this way before and it’s intoxicating.

Azriel

I turn to see a panting Elain pressed against the side door, her eyes pressed closed and a small smile forming on her lips. I’m far too pleased to see that she followed my instructions. “Hi,” I say, looking her over and holy gods.“Hi yourself,” she says in a flirty tone. Her long golden hair is braided and draped gently over her delicate shoulder. She’s wearing skin tight leather pants that hug her supple curves. They look so good on her, like she’s destined for the dark side. My eyes trace up her form and snag on the sheer white t-shirt that reveals a hint of the baby pink bra underneath. The sunlight from the door window lights up her heart-shaped face. I swear the sunlight hits this woman differently than other people. The golden rays sink into her skin and make her glow. 

The urge to run my hands over those curves causes my fingers to twitch at my side. Desire punching me in the stomach. I can’t help it, I keep staring - and everything gets so much worse as Elain turns around to look out the window, making sure the coast is clear. My gaze sweeps over the dip of her waist to the swell of her perfect ass. My cock twitches.  

As hard as it is, I remind myself to focus and pull out the amethyst gift bag I’ve stashed away. “For the ride,” my voice is more husky than I anticipated.  

Her hand gently grazes mine as she takes the gift from me. A pulse of energy sends a shiver down my spine. I watch as she pulls out the black leather riding jacket I spent way too much money on. Her fingers sweep over the supple buttery material and dance over the delicate flowers embroidered down the forearms and along the collar. The pattern is a mix of bright red roses, plum colored violets, and pink begonias intricately stitched with verdant leaves. The letter E is elegantly sewn along the left lapel. It’s probably too much but it reminded me of Elain and I wanted her to have it. Even if all we get is this one ride together it's worth it. 

She tugs on the jacket an asks, “How do I look?” 

I swallow the lump forming in my throat, “Perfect.” More than perfect . Elain walks toward me, placing her warm hand on my arm as she stands on her toes and kisses my cheek. “Thank you.” The gesture takes me by surprise and nearly unravels me. All the brooding self deprecating thoughts from earlier this week melt away with that painfully sweet gesture. 

Clearing my throat, I turn my attention back to the point of our date and gesture Elain toward my motorcycle. We walk through the proper way to get on and off a bike. Noting to avoid the muffler pipe on the side that will get hot enough to burn. I explain that we’re going to ride to the base of Ramiel, a mountain in the Illyrian steppes. Her eyes sparkle with excitement as I pass her a helmet. I lean forward and gently tighten the strap under her chin. Unable to resist the opportunity to help her, to touch her, to do more. 

Swinging my leg over the bike, I turn to her and pat the spot behind me. Her soft thighs press into mine and a thrill runs through me knowing how intimate riding together will be. 

As we take off, I hear the explosive I put in the neighbors trash can go off, providing us with the perfect distraction to ride off and leave the world behind. 

“Hold tight and don’t make a sound.” 

-----------------------------------

I try to take in the sensations of riding but all I can think about is the feel of Elain’s soft body pressed against mine. The way her hands grip my waist. Despite all the layers of leather we still feel impossibly close. It takes awhile for my thoughts to clear long enough to feel the familiar rush of the wind as it moves past us. How the motorcycle hugs the curves of the road. I increase the speed, feeling the familiar rush of blood pounding in my ears as adrenaline takes over. I feel free. I feel alive. I hear Elain giggle in my ear. Like she can’t help the burst of joy that springs free as we fly down a steep hill. I laugh with her, unable to mask my own happiness. “Oh, I didn’t realize the helmets have mics.” Her shyness quickly fades as we round another curve. “This is amazing,” she shouts like she might burst with joy.

For the next half hour we make our way around the winding road that leads to Ramiel. I point out interesting parts of the terrain. I find myself sharing funny stories of my childhood with Rhys and Cass. It’s always easier to open up with Elain, even when I have every intention not to. When we’re not talking I relish the peaceful quiet moments. Content just to be here with her, where I don't have to share her with anyone else. 

The summer evening is fading into the golden glow of dusk. Ramiel looms ahead like a great mythical beast. “There is a small bar up ahead that we can stop and eat at. It's nothing fancy but it's one of the only places in Illyria I like.” I hope she doesn’t hear the subtext of my statement. Unlike Cassian, I loathe Illyria and my past here. But she doesn't push me.  As someone whose worst days constantly define her present, I think Elain sympathizes with my reluctance to share my darker memories. I try not to think about those now. Not while I'm with her. I don't want to tarnish this precious time I have with Elain for anything.

We pull up to a small building, aged and weather worn, there is a rustic sort of charm to it which is why I felt safe bringing her here. It’s not the type of spot tourists would visit but a hidden gem that only a local would love. The parking lot is gravel with a few motorcycles parked out front. The sign was faded but legible enough, ‘Siphon Station.’ We park the bike and get off. Turning to Elain. I gently unbuckle her helmet and offer her a scarred hand to help her down. I watch as she nervously messes with her braid, making sure it is suitable. 

I gently place a hand on her lower back and walk us through the front door. The place is smaller than I remember, there’s the familiar bar with eight stools, a few booths on the far side and a pool table in the back. Adjacent from the pool table is a dart board on the wall. Some of my favorite memories of Illyria are from this bar, getting drunk with my brothers and emptying their pockets when I beat them at every game we played. 

There are just a couple of other customers scattered around and a barman. They all stop and stare at us as we walk in and they quickly avert their eyes. I see Devon is right, my presence has already spread like wildfire . I lead us to a booth where Elain sits while I grab us something to drink. The barman pours us two whiskey shots while avoiding looking at me. Before I can pull out my wallet he mutters it’s on the house. I walk back to Elain, who is carefully taking in our surroundings. I hand her one of the glasses and sit across from her.

“Is this bar you called me from the other day?”

“No, that was a place in Windhaven.” 

She nods, “What kind of work required you to be at a bar so early in the morning?” There she is. No one else dares to ask me such direct questions, especially not about my work. I like that she isn’t afraid of me, that she feels safe asking but I can’t share that part of myself with her. So, I down my drink and stare into her eyes, “the kind I can't talk about.” 

I can see the urge to push me on it, to fight the rules I laid out. There is a quiet rebellion in Elain, one that tells me she doesn't like to do what she's told. Neither do I. That fact that we share that same defiant spark turns me on. I rub my hand through my hair, in an attempt to clear my head of my treacherous thoughts. 

“Have you checked out the town discord yet?”

She shrugs, “I'm afraid to look, why?”

“There's a poll on who your secret boyfriend is.”

“Oh gods,” she groans and puts her head on the table. “I'm half afraid to ask but, who are the contenders?”

I pull out my phone and show her. The options are Lucien, Graysen, Mr. Naked and lastly Elain is lying. Currently the last option is winning with Lucien not far behind. 

“Well, it looks like our secret is safe,” she says. Elain doesn't seem surprised by the results. She sighs heavily, “Nesta said I was making up a boyfriend too. I don't know which is worse, that they think my love life is their business or that they don't seem to know me at all.”

The barman places two plates on the table with sandwiches and pub chips. We eat quietly for a few moments before I ask, “Can I ask you something?” she nods. “Why don’t you tell them how you feel?” She looks at me confused, ”Who?” I give her a knowing look, “your sisters, the town, Lucien, you know… all of them.”

She mulls it over for a minute, “I don't want to hurt their feelings.” I shake my head, “You just walk around all day worrying about other people's feelings?” 

She gives me a bewildered look, “Yeah, don't you?’ 

“No.” Then more teasingly I ask, “Elain, how do you get anything done?” 

She gives me a small teasing smile, “It's really hard.”

I laugh. A deep belly shaking laugh. She is so funny when she’s not hiding herself away. 

“What would you do if you didn’t have to worry about what everyone else thought or expected?”

She takes a deep breath, like no one has ever asked her the question before and it makes me angry and sad for her. “Well, I’ve always wanted to travel. Anywhere really but if I had to choose where to start, I would want to see the tulip fields in the Netherlands first.” I listen, completely mesmerized by the quiet passion in her voice as she explains the cultivation process and the wide variety of bulbs used. She raves about how special the flowers are because they bloom for such a short period of time. 

Desperate for me I demand, “What else?” 

She looks at the rose on my hand and nods to it, “I’ve always wanted a tattoo.” I lean forward, feeling more than a little pleased.

“Why haven’t you?” 

She shrugs, “I don’t know. It would be too shocking. It would be out of character.” 

My eyes meet hers, “It seems to me, Elain, that you are waiting for someone to give you permission to be yourself.” 

She lets out a ragged breath, “That’s not true.” 

I click my tongue and run the pad of my thumb across her lips, “Did you know, you press your lips together right before you lie?” She closes her eyes, as if savoring the touch. She's so beautifully responsive. It makes me want to lay her out on the pool table and see how many little gasps and moans I can draw out of her. 

She says softly, a barely perceptible whisper, “I don’t know how to be anything else.” 

I release her face, “that’s not true, the hiding is the act, who you are is already there.”

She looks at my hand again, I see her fingers twitch as though she’s tempted to trace the ink there. She says shyly, “I’ve always admired the tattoo on your hand.” I look at my mottled hand and a wave of affection sweeps through me at the memory. 

“I actually designed this, I got it for my mother.” My heart squeezes a little. I wanted a reminder of the beauty in the world, a reminder of all the happy moments with her and I could think of no better place than my mutilated hand. My mother has always been the only person I could feel safe with, the only one who truly loves me no matter what. Before I realize it I start to speak.

“When I was a child, I rarely got to see her. I told you of how she taught me about flowers and told stories. Her favorite flower is a rose and she had these massive hedges of them in her backyard. Roses of every shade and variety. They were so beautiful. I would play there pretending in those hedges like they were part of my enchanted gardens. When it was time for my father to come and get me I would hide in those hedges. I knew he couldn’t reach in and grab me without cutting himself on the thorns. He didn’t know all the secret ways to slip in without getting scratched. I was safe there, tucked away in my mothers roses. Since then roses have reminded me of my mother, of the beauty she cultivated and the safety they provided.”

I notice her watching me closely and I know what she’s thinking. “Come on - don’t give me that look, please.” 

“Am I giving you a look?”

“Yes, a heavy one.” I bite the side of my cheek, “I’m fine now, it’s in the past.” Her eyes soften as she looks at me with concern.

Her soft finger grazes over my jaw, “If I press my lips together when I lie, then you bite the inside of your cheek when you do.” I turn away from her touch, stunned by how well she can see the truth behind the carefully constructed facade I hide behind. 

I turn my attention back to the topic at hand, “Let’s figure out what tattoo you should get.”

She gives me another look, like she might push me but to my relief she decides to drop it instead.

“Hmmm…  I don't know, maybe a slice of pie or a piece of cake here.” She points to the delicate skin on her wrist. “Or even here.” She turns and runs a hand along her ribs and underneath her breast. I let myself imagine it for a second and I run my tongue along the front of my teeth. “You should definitely get that it would be very sexy.”

“You think I would be sexy with a tattoo?”

I snort out a quick laugh. She must be joking. “No Elain. Don’t get it twisted. I already think you’re sexy without a tattoo. So I know you would be with one.”

She shifts uncomfortably, a look of anger and maybe even disappointment on her face. Something I said struck a nerve but before I can ask she quickly adjusts her expression. She smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes. It’s the smile I’ve seen her give Lucien a thousand times. Never once has it been directed at me. My hands clench and I want to demand for her to tell me what’s going on in that head of hers but she didn’t push me on my childhood and the least I can do is let this go. For now.

“Anything else?”

“I wasn’t lying when I said I was a fan of Sons of Anarchy. I’ve always wanted to ride a motorcycle. So, thank you.” I give her a mischievous smile, “You want to drive it?” She stares at me unsure if I’m sincere, but she nods emphatically. I stand up and reach out my hand, “then you'll have to earn it.”

I hold onto her hand and take her over to the dart board. “You'll have to beat me if you want to ride.” The tension from a moment ago is gone and is replaced with something else. 

She crosses her arms over her perky chest drawing my eyes to the lace peeking through the thin fabric. “and what do you get if I lose?” 

I grab a handful of darts and walk toward her, “if you lose, you'll have to get that tattoo.”

“But I've never played before.” Her doe eyes batting at me innocently. If she thinks I’m going to go easy on her because she’s beautiful shes got another thing coming. I have a reputation to uphold. That doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy myself though. I look her over and a plan is starting to form. If she wants me to teach her a lesson, I’ll be more than happy to. In fact, I'm going to see if my theory is correct, that she's been thinking about me as much as I've been thinking of her. 

I tug her in front of the dart board and sweep my hand down her arm, appreciating the trail of goosebumps I leave behind. I place a dart between her unmarred fingers and bring her hand in front of us. She smells divine like jasmine and honey and I fight the urge to press my face into her neck. 

“The trick to darts is in the wrist. Keep your elbow up at a ninety degree angle and use your wrist to propel it forward.” I let my hand skate back down to her elbow and grip her there adjusting her position. 

Pressing my lips to her ear I whisper,“There you go honey, show me what you've got.” 

I smile as I feel her shiver in my grasp. She’s clearly still worked up from earlier this week. I decide to be nice and step away from her so she can focus on taking her shot. 

Elain sends the dart  forward and it hits the far left side, narrowly missing the board. 

She turns to me disappointed. Swaggering up for my turn I give her a pat on the back for effort and then easily send a dart into the red circle in the center. 

“Now let’s try this again. Remember to flick your wrist like this,” I say as I take her hand into mine and move it back and forth. She bites her lip as she leans back into me. “And I keep my arm up like this, right?” My hand tightens on hers. I’m momentarily lost to the feel of her ass pressing into my cock and I imagine Cassian in the sauna to try and keep an erection from forming. Thankfully that does the trick. “Azriel?” Elain asks completely oblivious to where my mind has gone.

“Yes, just like that,” I manage to say. 

She steps out of my grasp and I watch as her shoulders relax and she loses the dart and it lands directly in the middle, a perfect bullseye. Almost too perfect. She turns to me with a satisfied smirk on her face. I narrow my eyes at her, “Elain.” 

Her smile drops ever so slightly, “beginner's luck?” she says innocently. 

“ Elain .” 

She steps toward me, “maybe, you're just that good of a teacher.” 

Her eyes meet mine, a twinkle of wicked delight is dancing there.

“ Elain .” I nearly moan. 

“What's the matter? Afraid you'll lose?” 

I know she’s bating me. I know she’s using my competitiveness against me. I’ve been played and I’m too turned on by her devious smile to be mad. I want to taste that smile. I want to pin her against the wall and see what other little games she’s like to play. But I also want to win.

I scoff, pressing forward, nearly nose to nose with her. I lean down to press my words into the hollow of her neck, “if you learn one thing about me honey, it’s that I never lose.” 

I reach down and pull the dart from her hand. I stalk toward the board, determined to get what I want. I always get what I want, one way or another. 

-----------------------------------

When we get back to the motorcycle, Elain has a faint pout on her lips. I would have never suspected her to be a sore loser, though she's too polite to admit it. Those brown eyes meet mine and I feel a little bit guilty. Normally I wouldn’t feel bad for winning so decisively but this is Elain. I never planned on denying her a chance to drive my bike. As if I could deny her anything. We get back on the motorcycle and I explain how there is an old dirt road at the base of Ramiel where she can safely practice driving. She whispers faintly through the mic, “Thank you, Azriel” and I smile to myself.

All around us are beautiful views. We’re elevated enough to see the rolling hills below but far enough down to see the peak of Ramiel standing proudly ahead. I bring us to a stop and help Elain off the bike. Then I slide backwards and pat the space in front of me. Placing my hands on her full hips, I gently guide her down until she is seated in front of me. I’m aware of her every move as I feel her lean back into my lap. My hands graze down the sides of her arms, placing her hands on the handle bars. I describe how to use the throttle and break, all the while I let my fingers hug hers as we practice gripping. 

“You think you got it?” She nods, I slide my hand down to her plump thigh and give her an encouraging pat, “‘whenever you’re ready.” 

Elain gently eases the throttle forward and we start moving, tentatively at first but with encouragement she becomes more confident in her ability. Her giggles of excitement fill my ears as she drives us down the road. I let my hands snake up to the middle of her waist, my hands nearly covering the entirety of her. The thought of it thrills me. I can’t resist the urge to pull her further into me. “There you go honey, you’re doing so well.” 

We near a curve and I bring my arm fully around her waist, pulling her tight, “lean into the curve with me,” enjoying the feeling of her ass pressing deeper into my lap. The route is quiet with nothing but views and the fading sun to keep us company. I focus on the road as best as I can. But I feel Elain everywhere. The sensation of her in front of me and the smell of her hair somehow getting through the face shield of my helmet. She presses her back into me and my grip on her tightens. Without realizing it, I find myself tracing circles on her lower belly. I need a space if I am going to maintain any sort of composure.

I direct Elain to pullover at a clearing up ahead. She awkwardly tries to break, failing to slow in a steady manner. I lean into her taking the handlebars to help. The change in the angle pushes her down beneath me and I swear I hear a faint whimper through the mic. She quickly takes off her helmet like she wants to avoid being heard. The last bit of the sun is falling behind the horizon. Dark blues and pinks paint the sky as the end of day nears. “Thank you for bringing me here, it’s beautiful.” Her expression is so open and trusting.

I changed my mind, the last thing I want is space. I wrap my arms around her and she leans back into my frame. “It’s one of my favorite spots in Illyria.” My head suddenly racing with how wrong it is to hold her like this, to want her when I shouldn’t. How she wouldn’t want my touch if she knew what my hands had done. Suddenly the image of the blood that coated them earlier this week flashes before me and I flinch.

She tilts her head back to look at me. My breath catches, my head suddenly quiet. I tenderly rub my knuckle across the apple of her cheek. For a moment, I think about kissing her but I remember the flare of hurt from earlier and can’t resist asking. “Elain, earlier when we talked you seemed to get upset with me. I'm sorry, if what I said bothered you.” 

“You have nothing to apologize for, Azriel.”

“I do though - I called you sexy and you seemed upset. I think I crossed a line and I want to apologize.”

“No, oh gods,” she buries her face in her hands, “I’m so embarrassed. Let’s just forget about it.”

“I’m sorry but I can't do that. What happened Elain? Are you upset I think you’re sexy? Are you afraid it’s going to change things between us?”

“No. I’m just upset because you’re teasing me!”

“Teasing you?”

“Yes, teasing me! I was finally opening up about the things that I want and you were mocking me. I felt silly because you are you and well I’m angel Elain. I forgot who I was supposed to be and you reminded me I’m nothing like the girl who gets tattoos, wears leather pants and seduces men in bars. It was just too much, it felt like a lie.” I press my hand against her lips to silence her.

“None of that was a lie Elain. I swear to you I’m not mocking you. I certainly don’t think you’re silly. And the part where I called you sexy is true you are unbelievably sexy. You weren’t even trying and you were seducing me.” And that’s when I notice the tears welling up in those honey colored eyes. I shift my hand from her mouth to her cheek and rub the tear rolling down her face. “Elain why does that make you cry?”

She turns her gaze from mine and shakes her head desperately like she’s hoping to shake her feelings away. “Because no one has ever said that to me before.” Those eyes open again and a burst of potent feelings hit me square in the chest. “They say it about Nesta and Feyre - but never me. I’m always praised for being sweet and kind and obedient. I’m the girl next door, the innocent one. I’m never viewed like that. Just the other day when I was at the bakery Lucien,” she trails off. 

“What did Lucien say?” I ask, feeling every muscle in my body go rigid. 

“Pauline was demanding he do something about my outfit and he said I wasn't sexy.”

“I’ll murder him.”

“Azriel,” she reprimands me with a surprised laugh. 

“I’m serious Elain. That guy doesn’t deserve to go on living for making you feel so shitty.” She laughs and I shift my hand around the back of her neck pulling her to face me completely. Not willing to let her go. “And he’s wrong about you. First, he was wrong about you being boring. You say you aren’t the type of girl that seduces men in bars but you had me eating out of the palm of your hand. Even when you think you’re doing something wrong you’re so godsdamn tempting that I wanted to lay you out and do things to you in the middle of the bar so filthy that they would have arrested us for public indecency. Second, how can you be boring when you light up every room you walk in with that perfect smile. My gods, you are drop dead gorgeous. So beautiful it’s hard to look at you and continue persuading myself that kissing you would be a mistake because of our agreement. And third, that ass.”

She gasps, “What about it?”

“Your ass is a masterpiece. Soft and curvy, it kills me. Your ass kills me Elain. And I need you to know if we weren’t just dating in the short term I would have already…” I let the sentence dangle as my eyes rake over her, implying everything I’ve dreamed of doing with Elain but not saying it out loud because I’ve already said too much as it is. In fact I think this is the longest I have talked in ages. What scares me the most is how much I enjoy talking to her. How I enjoy teasing her and coaxing out her reactions. I’m so good at playing games at seducing women. At strategically moving pieces around so that I can be seductive without having to actually give anyone a piece of myself. Without risking my feelings. But just now I was more honest than I’ve ever been in my life. 

I’m not playing games with Elain - I’m practically spilling my heart out to her. When our gazes lock again, her tears are gone. Instead her cheeks are rosy and she’s pressing a smile into the back of her hand. I gently angle her face closer to mine, “do you believe me?” She nods silently. And then her gaze drops to my lips. “You were wrong about something.”

“What’s that?”

“It wouldn’t be a mistake to kiss me.”

My heart pounds inside my chest. “It wouldn’t.”

“No. In fact, I think we should kiss because I could use the practice.”

“Elain, I told you we have to keep things PG.”

She smiles at me, “Kissing is PG according to the British Board of Film Classification.”

I fight back a smile. “Besides,” she adds, “I want to change the terms of our agreement.” She shifts until she is sitting facing me on the bike. “The whole thing started with me wanting to prove I’m not boring like Lucien said. That I can be bad… but the more time I spend with you, the more I feel myself coming to life. Something I can’t quite pinpoint but I don’t want to lose either. You make me feel different. I feel free when I’m with you. I feel adventurous and… curious.” A naughty twinkle sparks in her eyes and I feel my stomach clinch. I don’t respond, I have to know where this is going.

“So, I was wondering if you’d be someone to help me practice taking risks with, doing new things, and… maybe finding out who I am now?”

“Is that really what you want Elain?” I ask, dragging my thumb across her lower lip. 

“If it’s not too much to ask,” she says in a quiet whisper. 

“And tonight, you want to try kissing?”

Her chest rises with a heavy breath, “I haven’t kissed anyone in a couple of years. I need to shake off the cobwebs. See if I’m any good at it.”

That stuns me. 

I wrap my arms around her tugging her closer. I ask, “No one has kissed you in years Elain? How is that possible?” I’ve wanted to kiss her every second since I’ve met her. 

I feel her tremble against me. “Maybe there is something wrong with me. No one ever tries. I think my reputation makes men think I don’t like this stuff.”

“There’s nothing wrong with you.” I push back the hair that’s fallen loose from her braid and do what I’ve been fantasizing about since the day we met and sink my hands into her thick golden hair. I tug her head back and angle her face just the way I want it. I bend down to the corner of her mouth and whisper, “Nothing’s wrong with you honey.” 

“I might be bad at this,” she warns, eyes wide, watching me as I tease the edges of her lips. 

“I’m prepared.” And then just as I am about to close the gap, an idea hits me and I pull away. She looks disappointed, she thinks I’ve changed my mind.

“We still can’t fuck Elain, not unless you’re ready to fall in love with me.” She looks relieved that I still plan to kiss her. Those doe eyes are heavy lidded as if she’s intoxicated, “Good idea,” she adds and I smile. It’s not clear if she agrees with me that we can’t sleep together or if she thinks it's a good idea that we should. Either way,  I like the ambiguity of it. It will drive me crazy later wondering what she meant. The tension between us is cracking and I can tell she wants me to rush this and kiss her already, but the truth is, I love drawing it out. I love taking my time torturing us both. Truth be told there is no one I love torturing more than myself. 

Wrong - so wrong. It has never gone this far before.  But I don’t care. I need to know what the skin of her neck tastes like. What those perfect lips taste like. 

I sink my face down to her throat and lay one soft kiss there at the base. Her breath catches and I move to kiss under her jaw, opening my mouth to feel the warm press of her skin along my tongue. She shivers and I smile, moving up to kiss the corner of her mouth. The moment her warm, plush lips press into mine, my world spins. Any finesse or control I feel is destroyed, and I am suddenly at her mercy. 

She presses her body into mine and even though we aren’t doing more than pushing our lips together it already feels impossibly good. I force myself to keep it light even though I want nothing more than to have her bare and writhing beneath me. 

I only intended for it to be a quick luxurious kiss to get her blood warm. But damn . Her lips respond to mine as she rises to wrap her hands around my neck and my body thrums. My fingers curl into her hair and along the skin of her back. She’s so damn supple and as I slant my lips against hers I can’t help the slide of tongue into her mouth. 

Elain sighs the sweetest moan into my mouth as she parts her lips for me. Inviting me in to take more of her. She presses up and wraps her legs around my waist and our kiss quickly turns from chaste to devouring. I’m pulling her against me, my head swirling like I’ve had multiple rounds of whiskey. I savor every gasp and flick of her delicious tongue, every intentional press of her body into mine. And as I adjust myself back allowing her to climb even further into my lap the bike rocks unsteadily underneath us. What the hell am I doing? 

I want so much more than a kiss from her, and that’s why I pull away and slowly unwrap her arms from around me. “We should stop.” I say with a shaky voice. She doesn’t protest, seemingly agreeing with my thoughts. 

I rub the back of my neck. Get a grip Az it was just a kiss. 

“Was that okay?” Elain asks, self-consciously, and the very question is so absurd I nearly laugh. How she can doubt how sexy she is, how she unravels every ounce of my control. With my hand still on my neck I look at her knowing she can see how utterly wrecked I am by her. “Yes, honey, that kiss was more than okay.”

Elain turns away just a fraction and smiles to herself, and then does something so innocent, so honest it tears my cynical, terrified heart in half. She rests the tips of her fingers to her lips and smiles. 

As we pull into the garage later that night I have to ask, “Out of curiosity, what is your favorite flower?”

She drops her gaze to the flower on my hand and smiles. “Roses.”

[halfetirosie]

🥥🤤🍖 Damn it, now I'm hungry... 🍖🤤🥥

(Exercise 14 - 16 React-os!)

1) Ah, yes, a man a few words... 😅

I mean, to be fair, I assume Quincy has only ever participated in purely physical contests, so he might not know that he's supposed to elaborate?

---I'm not the only one that read that a "magikarp" for a second, right??

Rei must still be suffering from the Pokemon Curse--first I misread his real name as "Jolteon," and now this! 😅😅😅

2) EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!!!!! 🤢🤢🤢

YOOOOO WTF?!?!?! (⊙ ᗣ ⊙)

I assume that this must be similar to how people will eat octopus tentacles, which still move after death? BUT I WOULDN'T EAT THOSE EITHER!!!! Dead things should stay dead!!!!!----And I think my gag reflex would jump into overdrive if my food starting moving around in my mouth!!!!!!

Poor Eiden is fighting for his life here, stretching as far as he can to find something nice to say about this meal from HELL!!!!!

3) Vegetarian surprise!

(I thought the veggies would be a side-dish or a component of the meal, not the entire meal.)

At first I thought, "What do you mean by 'the limits of nutrition'? Is there such a thing as too much nutrition???"

But then I remembered that, YES, that is a very real thing! Consuming too much of a certain vitamin/mineral in a short time frame can actually be super dangerous to your health!

(I only remembered this because of a video essay I saw a while ago about a corrupt company in...I think South Korea??...whose upper executive would sometimes force employees to take huge amounts of vitamins, which made them get diarrhea/puke. It's fucked up.)

4) NEVER IN MY LIFE HAS THE EMOTIONAL_PIANO.MP3 BEEN SO TERRIFYING!!!!

Kuya continuing to reach new levels of evil; weaponizing Garu and Yaku's goodwill and cuteness against Eiden!!! 😈

Foxy Grandpa for sure put some of his weird-ass magic on the meal, like that tea that causes hiccups. 100%.

🤦‍♀️ Yup, it figures. That was a bit too obvious...

But fuck, Garu's sincerity here is too muchhhhh!!! How has he gotten this far and still trust Kuya's bullshit????

5) HELL YEAH, IT'S THE WORKAHOLIC DREAM TEAM!!!

I said it before but I'll say it again; these dudes are coordinated as fuck!!! They're giving such a damn professional presentation of their dish without missing a beat---like they rehearsed it!!! (Honestly, I bet they did.)

LOOK AT HIS SMUG GRIN!!!!

HE'S TOO GODDAMN CUTE!!!! ♡♡♡♡♡

6) Edmond, my love, I hate to break it to you, but...

....there is NO WAY IN HELL that anyone else will want to consume that "special honey sauce." ♡♡♡

....Scratch that---I don't think they'd even be capable of consuming that sauce at all!

If he can smell the sauce from a distance, then WHAT IN GOD'S NAME is in that sauce????

IS IT JUST HONEY WITH EVEN MORE SUGAR ADDED INTO IT???

....Don't answer that. I'm getting a cavity just think about it....

7) Awwww, look at them all pampering Garu!!!

Rei might deny it, but he really does live up to his nickname of "Big Bro Rei!" It's adorable!!!

⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

8) Peepaw Kuya back at it again with his sensitive palate! 😂😂😂

And Olivine is seriously too nice!!!

9) OH SHIT!!!!

🚨🚨🚨PEACEFUL YAKU/DANTE INTERACTION!!! 🚨🚨🚨

WHERE DANTE ISN'T ACCIDENTALLY MAKING YAKUMO GET STRESSED OR CRY!!!!

Is this the first chill interaction we've seen of these two so far, or am I not remembering a different one? Whatever---

All the Yaku/Dante shippers rejoice!!!! 🎉🎉🎉

Shoutout again to From the Earth, Necatar, which lives in my head rent-free!

10) Not gonna lie, I'm pretty disappointed that we didn't get to witness Quincy grill...

I guess Dante's too proud to give up his role as Grill Master; instead Quincy's in charge of "crackin open a cold one with the boys!"

....Unrelated, but I'm not the only one that expected Quincy to break open the coconuts with his bare hands, right?

11) HELL YEAH, MY BELOVED "PESKY LITTLE FIEND" WON THIS ROUND!!!!

I mean, I knew he would, but the confirmation feel nice. :D

12) !!! Oh??? 😮

Have we ever seen Karu's face look that scared before??? I feel like we haven't, or it's at least been a while!

13) Their bickering is as charming as ever---

It's a little hard to tell, since Danteis up to his Tsundere Bullshit™ and hell-bent on victory, but I'm pretty sure he's having the time of his life right now.

In fact, I think Dante's competitiveness is a sure-sign of that. Getting caught up in a silly contest is his way of having fun, you know?

It's like when he kept competing with Edmond at the festival games during Chase the Rainbow. He gets himself immersed/invested in something inconsequential, and has a good-ass time!!!

(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

14) Honestly, this part completely went over my head at first... 😅

I honestly don't know if Eiden's response was enough to confirm that he's secretly on Dante's team. Hell, I haven't even been theorizing about what Eiden's team might be or what his secret conditions are.

Usually I might've been trying to figure it out, but I feel like we've been given absolutely no clues in the story so far...Also, I have been hella busy lately---that's why my reaction posts have been slower lately---so I'm quite low on brain juice.

Idk man! This event is just so laid back, I don't feel the need to try so hard to figure it out. 🤷‍♀️

I'm just here to have a good time!

ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

🍖 End of report! 🍖

[randomly--accessed--memories]

Went through the RAM playlist and picked out all my favorite lines

I still don’t know who you are / I only know that I’m still lonely / That morbid sort where even company can’t cure me / And the more you reassure, the less I trust - Against the Kitchen Floor

All the king's horses and all the king's men / Couldn't put me back together again - All the King’s Horses

Make me pay for fucking up the rest of your life - AND I’M GONE

Take my identity / All the best parts of me / And mould them into what you want! - Another Tuesday Night

And it’s my problem if I have no friends and feel I want to die - Are You Satisfied?

A prison’s not always a dark place / With grey closed in walls and big loud chains / They can hide in the skin of a home - As Above So Below

Someday I will go back outside and see her, okay - Baby Hotline

Reborn / Reform / Twist my legs to one / And mind to none : Don’t leave me be / I’m a bathtub mermaid / I cannot swim but only sing - Bathtub Mermaid

I feel like / I never knew you / And I never wanna know you again - Better Off Gone

In this case, just won’t you go and please let it be / Because I still won’t be able to say sorry - Breaking Things Into Pieces

Tell me when to drink, tell me when to eat, tell me when to smile, tell me when to breathe / Tell me when I overreact / No, tell me again, please / I love being told what to do, but only when I'm told by you / At least, that's what I used to think, but nowadays, I'm on the brink - Cannibal

Take this pill, you'll feel much better / When you wake up numb and your brain's been severed - Careful What You Wish For

Take a good look this is me / This is what I’ve come to be - The Chattering Lack of Common Sense

They say they wanna help, but they always fucking leave - CODE MISTAKE

When did I become a man / Trapped inside a ghost? / If you could only see me now / I know I'd disappoint somehow - The Comfort of a Laugh Track

You'll be fine you honeycomb / Who could ever hurt you? Who could be so cold? - Community Gardens

I’ve become what you like / I am what you wanted, right? - Copycat

Stay asleep / And blame / Everyone for giving up - Cross

Oh, circumcise my love for you / It's far too vapid and aimless - Cupid

Under my skin, you're unwrapping / All that I am, I swear / I wanted to keep, I wanted to stay / Deep in your head forever / I wanna show you something / Melting through my brain / Every time you're around / You're assaulting me - D D D N N N A A A

Carved right into my head / Quick lobotomy / Then left me for dead - Dangerous

I don't think I know myself, without your help - A Dangerous Thing

Buried in the basement, cold cement / Dead comes talking, can’t put them to rest - The Dead Come Talking

So I’m taking your narrative, and I’m making it mine - The Dismemberment Song

I’m gonna be in love forever cause I’m gonna die tonight : Transformation complete, transformation complete / You are now, as you once were: beautiful - DOGMATICA

Well, who should I be then, if I'll never be the same? - Dr. Sunshine Is Dead

I’m black, then I’m white / No! Something isn’t right! / My enemy’s invisible, I don’t know how to fight - Echo

And so long to the person you begged me to be / He's down, he's dead / Now take a good long look at what you've done to me - Farewell Wanderlust

You hurt me / You hurt me / But it's all okay / Because I love you anyway : I have no clue what you’re saying / I’m gonna lose my mind! - Folie a Deux

I was shown my place, but I didn’t care for it - Gambler

I get to be dumb, you get to exercise control - GIRL HELL 1999

I’m not her / And I’ll never be / I’m just debris - Going Insane

You told me something along like / The lines of “It’s all my fault that you are the way you are” / That is right, it is all your fault / But I hope you just remember that it's not all there is to it - Heavenly You

A vivisection of me / Done by God for all to see - Honey I’m Home

Am I a toy to you, my love? / Just a thing to play and / Then throw away - A Human’s Touch

My love must be a kind of blind love / I can't see anyone but you - I Only Have Eyes For You

Me and the TV are enemies / Sickening static surrounds my mind - I’ll Sleep When I’m Dead

I've got you under my skin / I've got you deep in the heart of me / So deep in my heart that you're really a part of me - I've Got You Under My Skin

You say that I’m better / Why don’t I feel better? - Karma

Do I know who I pretend to be / Of whom am I a copy? - Language of the Lost

I only turned out to be just one more girl you slew - Let the Record Show

There’s an old voice in my head that’s holding me back / Well, tell her that I miss our little talks - Little Talks

You’re just a clown, just a pet / Whispering love yet again - Loveit?

Some moments last forever, but some flare out with love, love, love - Love Love Love

And now, even though you're mad, and these memories won't stay / That's okay / Cause now I get to meet you for the first time every single day - Marbles

Die once every three minutes - Marijuana’s a Working Woman

Doctor, I can’t tell if I’m not me - The Mind Electric

You want a taste of my brain / Okay, it’s yours anyway - Misery Meat

You were never my god - My Creator

The girl is like an architect / And I am just the new invention - New Invention

Please spare me indignity / And won't you please give me some decency? / And won't you please call it if our time is through? / Cause I know that we fall apart when nothing's new - Nothing’s New

I know exactly what’s best for you / I’ve don’t exactly what’s best for you - Novocaine

You're not a coward 'cause you cower / You're brave because they broke you / Yet broken still you breathe : Cause I'm not trapped, oh with you, you see / You're the one who's trapped with me / Cause you are in the earth of me / You are in the earth of me / My head's not yours, it's mine / And I'll take my fucking time / 'Cause I know, I know, I know - The Old Witch Sleep and the Good Man Grace

Novocaine, lobotomize me, teach me how to think - P3T

Safe from pain and truth and choice and other poison devils - Pet

What’s a pound of flesh between / Friends like me and you - Pound of Flesh

Folded puppets in a chest / Satin, static, lost in manic - Puppeteer

Close your mouth / And your eyes / And your heart / Your new eternity lies with us - Return to the Motherland

I get high to leave all these problems on the ground / Then to my surprise, they're right there when I come back down - Riptide

Look at me, look me in the eyes / Forget yourself, surrender your mind / Right now, you're mine / All mine / Give in, you're mine / All mine - Rule #34

Must be lonely loving someone / Try’na find their way out of a maze - Should’ve Been Me

There's something quite enjoyable when someone is destroyable - Sink or Swim

You hung me on your wall / Stabbed me with your push pins / In public, showed me off - The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

Now it sounds so good to me and it used to sound so good to me! / It doesn't sound so good to me, it never sounded good to me! - There’s Something Happening

This, this, this is not love / I don’t know what it is / But I know this / This is not love - This Is Not Love

You’d say that things have improved, right? - Those Who Carried On

I made you my temple, my mural, my sky / Now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life - tolerate it

I know / You belong to somebody new / But tonight you belong to me - Tonight You Belong to Me

So she dressed me up as the man she loved / Then threw me in a box when she had had enough / Now the light of day I no longer see / She stuck her voodoo pins where my eyes used to be / Accidentally tragic / Victim of her black magic / Had a boy once who loved me / Now he's so afraid of me - Toy Boy

The things I see are a dread I must withstand / On my own - Uncanny

I don’t think there’s anyone under your skin - Under My Skin

I wanted someone tall and firm to reassure that I'm doing this right / But it's starting to hurt when you hold me tight - Unreliable

When I'm too far gone / Dead in the eyes of my friends / Will you take me out of here - Watercolor

Stranger things than death can happen / To lab rat girls and pretty white rabbits - …well, better than the alternative

And when you scream, "I'm not alright" / And throw my picture at the wall / You were supposed to be my light / And keep me safe against them all / "How could you leave me here?" you'll scream / And louder, I'll scream back to you from that unknown / And say, "I know you're strong enough, I know you're strong enough / I know you're strong enough to do this on your own” - Welly Boots

Transformation / You've changed within / Some selfish mutation / A stranger I once called a friend - What Have You Become?

My head is spinning, I am beaten in the end - White Happy

Just take me as I am / A memory so vivid / And savor all the parts you can / Cause no one mourns the wicked - Wicked

You don't have to say you love me / Just be close at hand / You don't have to stay forever / I will understand - You Don't Have to Say You Love Me

[skatingbi]

HOW WILL SANJI AND ZORO BECOME BESTIES IN MY OP FIGHTER PILOT AU?? WELL IM GLAD U ASKED!!

It starts slow, but it definitely begins after their 1v1 dogfight training. TL;DR- Zoro gets humbled during the training exercise against Sanji.

Long answer:

In practical lessons the instructor (who I REALLY want to make Admiral Garp), at the request of Luffy, has Zoro and Sanji practice 1v1 dogfighting for the mission since only two aircraft will be available...And it goes about as well as you expect. Zoro has the upper hand until suddenly, Sanji pulls back and uses the abrupt change in speed to change directions easier and punches forward and upward to gain a height advantage. Eventually, after 2 thousand feet or so, it makes Zoro pull back enough for Sanji to maneuver the stick and crank the jet perpendicular to the surface to get right behind Zoro's aircraft and...bullseye. I'd have to rewrite this later since im still researching how to write dogfights and just general flight mechanics, but hopefully, it gets my point across for now.

Zoro is absolutely FLOORED and since then respects Sanji, but still picks fights with him.

He holds a newfound respect for Sanji and becomes more cooperative as a nav instead of complaining, which weirds Sanji out but like whatever, right?

In their bunks, Sanji is usually restless and hates sleeping (night terrors? PTSD? insomnia?? the world will never know), and Zoro wakes up one night and just goes, "Wanna spar?" and Sanji is confused because sparring for him was never fun, but Zoro looks like he's about to take back the offer, and so he says sure without even thinking.

That starts their semi regular training together other than top gun bullshit they have to do, and Sanji always goes to bed humbled since Zoro kicks his ass every time.

Zoro is a great guy and a great teacher in hand to hand combat. He learns that Zoro wasn't always a pilot, that he did get stationed in places like the north blue. He learns that Zoro has seen the more disturbing parts of war that pilots dont see every day. He also learns that Zoro isn't all just muscle and density (physically and mentally, Sanji thinks to himself), but he also despises sweets and thats why he never falls for the trick of candy in the MRE's that always have Luffy running laps every lunch despite it being a known rule.

Eventually, the arguing is more like playful bickering with camaraderie hidden behind it. Sanji picks fights for the hell of it, and Zoro rolls with it. Zoro knows that he would trust sanji with his life when shit hits the fan, and so would Sanji if the same happened to him.

Friendship for them is the same as they were before except theres respect and trust that they each earned, and Nami can finally breathe and is like "Thank god y'all got your shit together."

...

One night after their ritualistic sparring session when Sanji is asleep, he is suddenly woken up to Zoro gasping for breath and thrashing, and then the man throws himself off the bed and lands with a thud loud enough to wake up Luffy and Usopp. Usopp is confused as fuck and Luffy snorts awake and is half asleep until they both see Zoro suddenly stand up, extremely alert and sweating.

"Hey Zoro..? What's up, man?" Usopp asks tiredly with his question laced with concern. Whats weird, though, is that its like Zoro doesn't hear them. He's standing where he fell one second and suddenly making a sweep of their bunk the next. Sanji is watching from his top bunk, looking down at Zoro before looking straight at Luffy. It's almost like Luffy knows, and he nods and says, "Let him do his thing, i trust you to know what to do, Sanji," And so he does what Luffy says.

Everyone listens to the squad leader and quietly lets Zoro sweep the parameter, check the door, check around outside, the windows, the window locks, under the beds, until Zoro is standing in the center of the room with a look that gives away everything Sanji needs to know. Zoro isnt here, at least not mentally, so he slowly shuffles out of his top bunk, making note of how Zoro's gaze flicks to him suddenly and makes sure to telegraph his movements before they even happen.

After a few minutes, he's in front of Zoro, looking directly into his eyes and standing. Zoro's eyes almost seem distant, looking through him but into his soul at the same time.

"Hey, moss, what's going on in that head of yours?" Sanji whispers low enough, so it's barely heard by Luffy and Usopp, who watch in case anything happens. Sanji knows, though. He knows Zoro won't do anything, and if he does, then Sanji knows that Zoro trusts him enough to stop him.

Zoro is staring, and eventually, Sanji slowly moves his arm within his view, gently resting his palm on Zoro's chest and feeling the elevated heartbeat. "Mossy, you with me? You're in our barracks now. Not wherever your brain thinks you've ended up," and he can visibly see Zoro deflate, then a rough palm shakily holds onto his wrist like his life depends on it. Zoro is trembling, his shoulders shake with each breath now, and his eyebrows scrunch like he's fighting with himself. Maybe he is, Sanji thinks to himself.

After a while- maybe 5 minutes or 20. No one was keeping track of time - Zoro eventually has enough self-awareness to clear his throat and really look at Sanji, who is still there and looking right at Zoro. It's grounding, the hand on his chest, and blue and brown eyes looking at him. Luffy and Usopp are asleep again, and Zoro takes one deep breath and lets it out, closing his eyes and counting to ten, and instead of the horrors he saw again in his sleep, he sees Sanji.

"Thanks, cook." Zoro whispers. It strikes Sanji in his soul how vulnerable it sounds. How Zoro squeezes his wrist gently before letting go.

They dont talk about it, or the other times it happens, or the times Zoro does the same for Sanji but its him using deep pressure therapy in the form of a hug after Sanji wakes up with a yell and fight overtaking his system when flight ironically loses the battle.

Their friendship is odd, but it comforts both of them in a way nobody else ever has. They both know each other well enough now that they can work alongside each other while constantly making jabs at each other. Their lighthearted bickering reveals smiles that were previously hidden, and it lets them feel like they can be themselves a little bit more.

[szagaloree]

His wife….

Chapter 4

Contains: fluff/ptsd/sadness/bonding

I do lift ups, to try and take away my boredom, wasn’t helping but atleast getting exercise. “Heyyy spider how you holding up nephew?” Raven asks shaking his head like she always does “fine, bored,” he huffs sitting on the bunk bed, “I’m bored too, don’t feel like going anywhere though,” I said doing my lift ups, “mom… can you please tell me what happened last night?” He asks I sighed “spider what did I tell you,” I said sternly “I know I knowww, I really wanna know, Quaritch seemed out of it,” spider said “he’s always out of it,” Raven spoke passing by, I shake my head with a smirk “no seriously, like he’s sad, something hurt him,” he explains, “marines liek him don’t get sad he’s probably on his little man period,” Raven said I snorted “men have man periods?” Spider asks “nooo, don’t listen to that bitch, she’s just joking,” I laughed as I drop down, “okay look… I ended up telling Quaritch he’s your father,” Raven spins around “WHAT?!” She shouts.

“He ended up finding anyways but, fuck,” I huff “he’s my dad? Why..didn’t you tell me?” He asked, “I didn’t because I wanted to protect you, I don’t trust him that he’ll turn you into of them, I don’t want that for your spider,” I try to explain but spider shakes his head in disbelief “why would you just keep that from me?! I deserve to know who my father is,” he argued “spider I only did it-spider,” I called as he storms out I go to follow but Raven grabs my arm “let him cool down, Gwen.. but are you serious? Quaritch is his dad?” I nodded “we were married Raven,” her jaw dropped “I must’ve completely forgo-ohhhh shit! Ohhh shit! You’re right y’all were married! Oh my god! And you were pregnant with him!” She gasps in shock I sighed nodding.

I tear up feeling heartbroken and disappointed with myself, “Awww gwen,” she comforts me as I cried, “I just want him to be safe,” I said, “I know he’s only a kid, his mind doesn’t fully understand, you just gotta give him time,” she said, later on I was freaking out because I don’t know where spider was. He was gone almost all day, I spot him in the lab with Quaritch, I stopped in my tracks, as I watched them spider was smiling and talking and what surprised me was how Quaritch was smiling, I never seen that from him before except when I was pregnant that was the last time I have ever seen him be “human” I sighed turning around leaving but Quaritch already saw me.

I walk into my quarters “found spider?” Ellice asks.

“Mhm” I said laying in my bed, “where is he at?” Raven asks “where you think?” I cock a brow huffing, “that’s kid for ya as soon as they hear the truth about their other parents they run right to them like it’s nothin,” she said, shaking my head I put my hand over my eyes falling asleep. A few minutes later spider walks “hey kiddo,” Allen said “hey” he said with a sad tone, “your mom’s asleep,” Ellice tells him, we walks over sighing. “Your mother never wanted this for you, she wanted you out of this, it’s only a matter of time shit hits the fan,” Ellice said climbing on the top bunk, spider taps my shoulder “mom” he calls, I yawn waking up surprised to see spider sitting next to me.

“I need to talk to you,” he says.

“What is it?” I ask stretching my tired body, “can you come with me?” He asks I get up, I follow him out to a different room, “where are we going spider?” I ask, he walks inside and when I follow him my face dropped into a annoyed glare “surprise surprise” Quaritch says with a smirk, “really spider?” I look at him, he nervously smiled, “I want to make an..agreement with you,” he said “sounds like you were struggling to say deal,” I cock a brow while crossing my arms he huffs. “If it’s fine, I would like to coparent,” he said, my mouth hung open in shock, spider snickered, “coparent? You coparent?” I pointed “yes..a child needs both their parents and I guess we need to make up for the time that has been lost,” he says, I really couldn’t put together was this fool said, I was very surprised and confused. He acted like he didn’t want nothing to do with spider nor did he really care.

“Hmph” I look at spider “please?” Spider begs, “see even he wants too,” Quaritch says trying to convince me to say yes, I huff grunting in aggravation “I’m going to fucking regret this, fuck…. Fine” I huff, spider and Quaritch smirked at each other “don’t make me regret this, or I’ll shove your tail up your ass,” I said, “but you will not taking him anywhere outside of the forest which fucking means you will not be using him to track sully,” I said, “alright, that’s cool with me,” he said, I huff shaking my head. After the next few days things have been going pretty well, I’m ashamed to say it. Spider has been hanging out with his dad a lot, they would talk about his favorite things, he loves football and basketball. I yawn tiredly, as I walk into the lab to go and get spider, “how did you and mom meet?” He asks “welll.. we both met at a friends football watch party, he introduced me to her and I just couldn’t take my eyes off of her, she’s the most beautiful person I ever met, so I decided to talk to her and she was kind of shy and laid back, she didn’t bother anybody or really speak to people unless they come up to her,” he says with a faint smile as he begins to dream of the moment we first me. I cross my arms leaning on the wall with a soft smile “as we talked I decided to ask for her number and what not she surprisingly said yes so fast forward I asked her out on a date, took her to a very dance restaurant and we got to know each other,” he spoke, “you had feelings for her even when you first met?” Spider asks, “yea, and I never believed in love at first sight but it definitely was just that, I found she was in the military same was eye but she was two ranks above me and boy she was beast, she was thee boss, and that’s what I loved about her she never backed down from a fight and she shocked me so much by that, from somebody who was shy around me sure as hell was fierce with others,” he chuckles.

“Maybe because she liked you,” spider said, “mhm, she did she loved me like crazy, we got married both in the military till the rda came and offered us the job, we took that and here we landed on Pandora… fast forward throughout the time she seemed so intro he nature, the-the creatures and all that, I just couldn’t see that, I never understood why she cared to protect these people, but she told me one day she was pregnant and boy I was shocked I couldn’t believe it, I was hoping for a boy, she thought it was a girl, but during that time it out a strain on us because she wanted you safe she wanted to walk away from the rda and the military shit, because of the pregnancy and don’t get me wrong I wanted to as well but I couldn’t just.. Walk away and leave it’ll be to dangerous for her to go back and our world is already fucked up,” he sighed staring down at the ground, spider frowns “I was very fucked up back then, I wanted both my wife and my child safe but it just kept holding me back like a drug,” he swallows thickly as spider crawls over towards him, “do you..blame yourself?” He asks, “when I found out your mother died, I-I just went rogue I took my anger out even more, I do blame myself actually,” he said.

I walk in from behind the wall, Quaritch looks up “time to go kid, mama’s here,” he said, “aww I wanna hear the rest of it,” spider pouts, I guess a little story wouldn’t hurt,” I said crossing my arms, Quaritch raises a suspicious brow at me, “mom, did you really get tangled in the parachute when you landed?” Spider asks my eyes go wide “you told him that?!” Quaritch snickered I huff “no I didn’t.. it was the wind,” I huff.

Spider laughed “alright time to go to bed, let’s go,” I said he pouts but gets up huffing and puffing, “you remember everything?” I ask Quaritch, he sighed nodding “I uhh… I looked at more videos, ended up finding more and it, yea,” he stares down the ground, I sighed walking over to him “so, what are you thinking?” I ask, he huffs shaking his head, “come on tell me,” I sat down, “I was.. really fucked up, and selfish, I was so stuck on doing my job,” he tries to explain, “and you see why now? They’re treating you like a damn puppet, that’s y’all are only here for,” I said sighing, I stood up and he quickly follows grabbing my wrist to stop me, he turns me around “I never wanted it to be this way,” he said, “you make it hard for me to believe you, you’re after jake and his family! His kids! You tried to hurt his kids! And you expect somebody to fucking believe could change and do better,” I said, “and what if i do change, what benefits me?” He questions “a son, go after him if you want you will not see your son I will make you not see the light of day,” I threatened he sighed.

I begin to walk away “one chance” he said I stopped, “…just…one chance okay, it’s only a matter of time before Carmella shuts us all down,” he said, “I go by actions, not words,” I said then left.