#glurk

[bloodstainedtomes]

Goretober 2023 days 1 - 5

[jaune-submissive-and-breedable]

He was dying, there was no other way to explain everything that kept happening to him. Every morning he woke up and felt like shit, his arms and legs felt as though they had been stretched in various ways, his pelvis was always sore, and some mornings it hurt to sit down because his ass was sore. Not to mention he was always super dehydrated. He tried asking his teammates but they didn’t know what was up, if anything Jaune thought they all looked far to relaxed every morning. The only thing he could think of was the healthy smoothies Ren made him every night.

Jaune groaned as he slumped into a chair at the cafetaria table, hissing loudly as he did. Across and beside him, his teammates looked on with worried expressions.

"Are you feeling alright, Jaune?" Pyrrha asked, placing a hand on his back.

"Yeah Jaune-Jaune, You look like you've caught the plague" Nora chirped, taking a big bite of her pancake.

"ARrrggghhhhh.....I think I'm Dying" he asnwered, garnering stunned faces from his team.

"Oh MY OUM, YOU DO HAVE THE PLAGUE! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Nora screeched, immediately jumping from the table and making a cross with her index fingers.

"Nora, Jaune's not dying" Lian said calmly "probably just a bad dream"

Pyrrha smiled and rubbed his back "I agree with Lian. You aren't dying, but you do look like you've had a bad dream. Was it?"

The boy in question only let his head rest in his hand, eyes closed and a frown on his face. Grumbling some incoherent sentences before turning to his team.

"I....don't know.....All I know is I wake up with my mouth dry and salty, skin all crusty, my pelvis sore, and...I can barely sit down some times"

He looked at his teammates, all trying to surpress laughs and smiles. "You guys hear anything last night?"

"No sorry"

"Nope!"

"Unfortunately not"

He groaned once more and let his head fall on the table. He raised an eyebrow as he noticed they appeared quite chirping and refreshed every morning. It threw him for a loop, but he just chalked it up to them somehow getting a good night's sleep unlike him. Suddenly a thought popped into his head as he thought about his teammates. Lian's healthy smoothies she made for everyone before bed.

"I think I found the culprit behind my lack of sleep" he stated, unaware of his teammates looking at each other with worry "Lian......I think your healthy smoothies are giving me nightmares.."

The girl in question appeared shocked and apologized "I'm sorry, Jaune. I'll try to adjust them accordingly"

The three girls waited with bated breath for his response, each exchanging quick glances at the other.

"Fine......" they heard him say. Each released a collective sigh of relief that when unnoticed by the arc.

"Also try to make them taste better" Nora piped up, her other teammates agreeing with her statement, much to Lian's dismay.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later that night:

PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP

GLURK GLURK GLURK GLURK

From Jaune's bed, two feminine figures held his body in between them their sweat-drenched bodies. The two in question were Lian, at the head, and Nora at his rear. Both panting and grunting as they ground and thrust his sleeping form. Lian grinds her drooling pussy into his mouth, nearly going cross-eyed from the pleasures. Meanwhile, Nora frantically thrusted into his asshole with a pink ursine strap-on toy. To the sides, Pyrrha could be seen rubbing her clit as she watched her teammates violate her crush's body.

Unbeknownst to jaune, his teammates had grown affectionate for him. They would drop little hits for him like purposely forgetting to lock the bathroom door while showering

"FUCK! His ass is getting fatter every day!" Nora grunted as she roughly slapped the surprisingly plump and firm behind of her team leader. "Your training works wonders Rha-rha"

Lian moaned and leaned forward, using his chest for support, rolling her hips against his mouth. Spreading her juices around his face.

"Easy, Nora" she whispered harshly, "You shouldn't leave marks. He's bound to get suspicious if he finds marks on him"

Lian leaned forward a bit more til Jaune's cock was direct in front of her. The phallic organ still leaking cum from previous ejaculations. She took a long drag of cum from the tip, letting the unique flavor envelope her tongue before she pulled it back in her mouth. Gulping it down greedily.

"but.....I think he's becoming immune to the knock drug...It took longer for him to fall asleep today" Lian pushed herself off his chest and face, taking up behind the blonde's head. "What do we do if he wakes up one day? It'll be kinda hard to explain"

Pyrrha laughed at her teammate's concern, not worried about the possibility presented. Ceasing the stimulation of her clitoris, she rose up and made her way over the Jaune's bunk, discarding her nightgown to the side as she did. Seeing her approach, Nora pulled her toy out of Jaune's ass and back away, a knowing smile on her face.

"It's simple Lian" she purred as she positioned herself between his legs. Grabbing hold of his ankles, she lifted his legs high in the air, and in one swift motion, she pushed his sensitive cock inside her hungry snatch, aiming to take him Amazon style. Smiling contently as she felt him burst just from insertion.

"We convince him it's all a nghtmare~"

[touyaism]

content: giving dabi head during a meeting

tw: accidental voyeurism, public

wc: 1143

Nobody even noticed that you’d left the meeting.

But that was okay, because you hadn’t, not really.

Dabi��s hand gripped the back of your head, pulling you in and between his open legs. And not caring about your pride all that much, he smashed your face into his jeans. You made some kind of muffled grunt, but you couldn’t be too loud. Not when you were beneath a table filled with Japan’s most powerful villains. Dabi knew that too, so he smashed you in again harder, forcing you to feel the stiffness that was his cock.

So you opened your mouth and obeyed, drooling all over his pants and panting with need.

The thrill of taking Dabi’s cock right beside his coworkers, the most wanted men in Japan, was exhilarating. You liked the danger, liked the threat of being caught. And with the way you could see Dabi smirking above you, you guessed he did too.

“What so funny,” someone asked him. He shrugged them off and gripped you harder, guiding you upwards by your hair and prompting you to just pull his pants down already.

Your hands tugged at the waistband, and you were glad he chose not to wear a belt today. They slipped down with enough ease, and pulling his stiff cock from his briefs was no tough chore, not when his cock was that fucking big .

You took him in your hands and felt him shiver. Cute .

You dragged your thumb along his slit, teasing the precome and rubbing it in, just to feel him do it again.

His grip on your hair tightened, and when you looked up, he was looking right at you - expression unreadable, but focused. He quickly averted his attention when Shigaraki asked him a question about their current mission.

“Yeah,” he said, casual as ever. “I’ll have that evidence in by tomorrow.”

It was insulting, just how calm he could be. You wanted to see him break - wanted to be the reason for it.

The others continued speaking, so you dragged your tongue along his length, one long stride starting from the base. You took your time on each piercing on the way up, toying with the cool metal between your tongue and coating it with your saliva.

He squirmed, just a little, but that wasn’t enough.

You circled your tongue around the head of his cock, painfully slow, taking your time and teasing more precome from him, licking it up like it was the best thing you’d ever tasted.

Your speed irritated him, you could feel it in the way he held you, pushed you closer as if he was trying to pass on a message. You smiled against him - a challenge, one he gladly took on.

You hardly got a moment to breathe before his fingers were diving into your mouth, gripping your jaw and forcing your lips open. The hand in your hair guided you, and he forced your mouth onto his dick.

You had no choice but to obey, and when you gasped for just one breath of air, he took the opportunity to force more of himself inside of you. You heard him sigh above you, something that would go unnoticed by his coworkers, but certainly not by you. He breathed in through his nose and shifted a little, trying to contain his obvious pleasure.

The head took up your entire tongue, and you tried your best not to whimper, but when he rolled his hips against your mouth, pushing most of his length into your throat, you couldn’t stop the muffled gagging noises. He was too fucking big for you not to gag. He groaned at the sound, evidently pleased by your struggling, a sound that again, went unnoticed by his coworkers, passed off as a simple sound of boredom.

Dabi picked up his speed, properly throat fucking you beneath the desk. Your hands desperately grabbed at his legs for support, digging into the fabric as you held back the lewd sounds of your gagging. He angled your head in a way that only made the sounds louder.

The wet glurk sounds coming from your throat only encouraged him further, he pushed your head down deep enough for it to restrict your breathing. He loved it, loved the way it made your little throat tighten around him. He loved the way he could feel you holding back your sounds, and he loved the way he was too big for you to contain them.

You felt lightheaded, but allowed him to use you as he pleased - letting him fuck any kind of rational thought away, until all you knew was his his cock in your throat.

“Dabi,” Shigaraki chimed in again, this time, his tone was stern. “The hell’s wrong with you. Open your fucking eyes.”

“Ah,” he groaned, a bit too suspiciously. “I’m close… to falling asleep.”

“Like hell you are, wake up.”

Dabi stretched, using the action as an opportunity to thrust one last time into your little fucked-out mouth. You gagged harder than before, only to be greeted with the sensation of hot cum leaking into the very back of your throat, the warmth sinking down and threatening to make you choke. Dabi held you there, despite feeling your need to cough. He ensured not a drop was lost.

When he finally pulled out, you felt your throat already beginning to ache. But he closed your mouth shut, forcing you to swallow every drop of his load before you were even allowed to think about coughing.

You obeyed, and when you looked back up at him, you opened your mouth, just to show him the end result. He smirked before turning back to someone else at the table, muttering some kind of nonsense about the new nomu’s that you didn’t really understand.

You tried to hold back your coughing, really, but it was too late. Your body reacted without your permission, and you coughed loudly beneath the desk.

The group went silent.

“Did you find it?” Dabi broke it, looking down at you with a puzzled expression on his face. “I’m sure it was down there somewhere, right?” You caught the way he smirked at you, a look that only the two of you knew what meant.

“Yeah,” another cough, “It’s here.” You picked up a broken pen, just beside the table leg, and pulled yourself up to face the group.

“Sorry,” you caught your breath, head already spinning from rising so quickly. But you took your seat, as professional as ever, right beside Dabi.

You just hoped nobody noticed how disarrayed your hair was, how your mascara had melted beneath your eyes, and how your lips were swollen and pink.

But judging by the cocky grin on Dabi’s face, it was safe to say he didn’t give a shit.

[eowyn7023]

Oh, goodness! It looks like someone strung up some mistletoe! What three couples (or throuples!) got stuck together underneath and how’d they react?

ADAR'S THOUGHTS: Forget the knife, Galadriel. Look at the mistletoe!

GALADRIEL'S THOUGHTS: Kiss, kill, or marry?

....

.... ADAR: Have you forgotten your Rúmil? Always kiss under the mistletoe.

ELROND: Glurk!

.....

..... SAURON'S THOUGHTS: I bet Adar hung mistletoe again this year. He is such a sappy romantic.

ADAR'S THOUGHTS: Death to tyrants!

[superiorsturgeon]

The Quickest Way to a Man’s Heart

Pyrrha: *calling home from Beacon* Mom, do you have any recipes you can send from Mistral? My teammates always do the cooking and I want to make something for them!

Mama Nikos: Of course, dear! I’ll send you some Mistrali favorites!

Later that day…

Pyrrha: *wearing a spear-patterned apron, sets down a platter of food in front of her teammates* Here you go! A Mistrali special, with a couple Nikos adjustments for fun! 😉

Nora: *whispers* I don’t want to hurt Pyrrha’s feelings, but does this even look edible to you?

Ren: *shudders* Not even a little!

Pyrrha: *watching her team not touching their food* 😥

Jaune: *notices his partner’s distress and takes a deep breath, then digs into the questionable Nikos food* 🍴😫

Jaune: *glurk!* ���

Jaune: *struggling to avoid throwing up or visibly wincing* T-this is d-delicious, Pyrrha! Ren, Nora, can…can I have yours if you’re not hungry?

Ren/Nora: *staring in horror* Oh gods, he actually swallowed it!!! 😱

Pyrrha: You really liked it, Jaune? 😃 🥰

Jaune: 😰*through gritted teeth, trying to hold back vomit* 🥲 Of course! *hurp!* Thanks, Pyrrha! Can we *ourp* have this again later?

Pyrrha: Of course! Since you like it so much, every Tuesday from here on will be Mistrali dinner night, special for Jaune! 😊

Jaune: *inside* 😨 I’m going to die! I’ve seen the face of death and it has a cute red ponytail and an apron!

Jaune: *out loud* That sounds awesome! I can’t wait!

———————————————————————

About a year later…

Jaune: *eating Mistrali food again because it’s Tuesday* Thanks again for cooking Pyrrha!

Pyrrha: 😊 *practically glowing* He likes my cooking!

Pyrrha: Of course! Now eat up! I made it with extra protein since we’re doing strength training this week!

Pyrrha: *practically skips back to the kitchen to clean up* 🥰

Jaune: *eating happily* Isn’t it weird how much Pyrrha’s improved her cooking since last year?

Nora: *not touching her plate* Jaune-Jaune, you know I love you, but are you on drugs right now?

Ren: If anything, Pyrrha’s cooking skills have actually gotten WORSE, if that’s even possible…

Jaune: What? Come on, there’s nothing wrong with this food! It just needs a little salt, at most! I think Pyrrha’s cooking is great!

Nora: That’s because you got together-together with Pyrrha last year and love has made you stupid! 😑

Ren: I knew love was blind, but apparently it has no sense of taste either…😒

Jaune: *taking both their plates and adding it to his own* You guys have no appreciation for fine Mistrali cuisine!

———————————————————————

Another year down the road…

Nora: We finally made it to Mistral!

Pyrrha: *excitedly pulling Jaune by the hand* I can’t wait to show you around! I missed being back home so much! Let’s go eat lunch at a local restaurant I know! Oh, I hope the menu hasn’t changed too much…!

JNPR: *all line up and place their orders*

Pyrrha: Oh, I’m so excited for my team to try the food I grew up with! I’ve done my best to make it for you every Tuesday!

Nora: *immediately chowing down* Mmmh! This is GREAT!

Ren: I must say, Mistrali food is delicious!

Pyrrha: *happily enjoying the food she missed from her childhood* Mmmm…! So much better than I can make it…! ☺️

Jaune: *carefully chewing*

Pyrrha: What do you think of it, Jaune?

Jaune: …

Jaune: …Pyrrha, I’m sorry, but I don’t think I like this…

Pyrrha: What…?

Nora: Seriously? This stuff is AWESOME!!!

Ren: I agree! This might be the best meal I’ve had in weeks.

Jaune: I’m sorry! It’s just…well…

Pyrrha: *deflating* Just what, Jaune?

Jaune: It’s just that Pyrrha makes it so much better!

_NPR: …

Ren/Nora: W H A T…?

Jaune: I mean, I don’t want to be a rude tourist, but I guess I just assumed Mistrali food was all as good as Pyrrha’s cooking, you know?

Jaune: I guess this stuff is okay, but…Pyrrha, would you mind making dinner later? I think I like it better the way you do it.

Ren: Jaune, you do realize that this restaurant is literally world-renowned for making incredible Mistrali food?

Jaune: Well…yeah, I guess, but I still think Pyrrha’s version is better!

Pyrrha: *at a loss for words* …I… 😳

Pyrrha: *sniffles* 🥹 …of course, Jaune. I’ll make as much as you want!

Nora: I’ve drank syrup straight from the bottle that was less sweet than this! Kiss him already!

[juanarc-thethird]

Don't leave your MILFs unattended. Part #3

Kali: I'm done cleaning the clothes. Now it's time to go and collect rent from Jaune.

Blake: Mom, I can't believe you're charging my friend so he can stay here.

Kali: Hey, he insisted. If it were up to me he could stay in the guest room for free.

Blake: *sighs* Whatever. I'll go to the bookstore for a moment to pick up my order. See ya *Leaves*

Kali: Have fun....

Kali: Time to get that rent~💕

Kali walks to the guest room and knocks on the door. The door opens and Jaune appears on the other side, dressed in sportswear.

Jaune: Oh hi ma'am. Good morning.

Kali: Oh Jaune, I told you to call my Kali when we are alone.

Jaune: Sorry, what can I do for you, Kali?

Kali: It's the end of the month, I came for the rent.

Jaune: Sure. *Gives her the money*

Kali: *Counts it * Looks like you are short again this month. You got the rest on you or are we gonna have to... "figure it out" again?... and again and again...~

Moments later

Kali: *Choking on that fat dick* *GUAWK!* *GLURK!* *GLURK!* *SLURP!* *SHORP!*

Jaune: Oh fuck! Kali, I'm about to cum!~

Kali: *POP!* *Stops* Not so fast handsome, I want you to deposit your payment deep inside me~💕

--------------

Jaune: *On top of Kali, fucking like a rabbit in heat* *PLAP!* *PLAP!* *PLAP!*

Kali: *Hugs him tightly* Fuck, you're so good baby...! While we are it, why don't we "get off" a couple more months of rent, yeah?!

Jaune: Oh shit, Kali!!~ *He slams his hips against her, filling her with all his cum*

Kali: Oh FuCKk!~💕

Later that day

Blake: I'm back.

Kali: *Glowing bright, and holding a tray of cookies* Welcome Home.

Jaune: *Almost dead* Hi...

Blake: What happen?

Kali: I put Jaune to work to pay what he was missing in rent, nothing big. Do you want a cookie?

Blake: Sure...

[fastfur07]

"What? Eat them? Eat my dear friend? No, *lick*, I could never! Why would - *nibble* - you even suggest something so *ahmpf* cruel? Eating a person! What do you take me for, *om*, some kind of cannibal? *Glurk*, what quirk of thought in your mind led, *shlurpf*, mm, led you to accuse me of such a thing? Well, let me allay your fears, *glorp*, friend. I swear on my life that I would never *monch, nomf* so much as lick, or nibble, or bite - *OLMP* - any of my friends, no matter how *shluuurp* delicious they may seem! Never in a million *glp* years! *urp* Excuse me, I have to go look for my friend, they seem to have run off somewhere."

[dapurinthos]

master caudle: now it's important that you read through all six double-sided pages of this patient information sheet before you give your small child these prescribed stimulants. sifo-dyas: got it. sifo-dyas: wow this is a lot of bullshit. caudle: yeah they think they need to be virtuous about the fact that they're making speed for kids that they're making huge profits from, instead of providing a needed substance for people with differently-wired brains. sifo-dyas: i think it would be really hilarious if i made ari listen to me recite all six double-sided pages. narrator: things did not go as he expected.

Master Si arranges it so that when he presents the acid green pill bottle to me, it's directly under the sofa-side lamp, illuminated like a holy object in a shrine. “Your legally-acquired, medical-grade stimulants.”

I grab at it, but he moves it back out of my reach, and holds up his other hand, blocking me.

“I have instructions,” he warns. That's as far as he gets.

I leap up and across the sofa in a move that would make an Ataru master sit up and demand where that sort of energy was when I was in their class. In the moment before I land on him, Master Si’s eyes go the widest I've ever seen them.

The idea that he may have just made a mistake is plainly visible on his face. He scrambles back, hits the arm of the sofa, then fumbles his way off of it and out of my way. He Force-pushes at the air and it forces me into a gentler stop than I had planned.

“Rules!”

I eye the new distance between us. “Give.”

“I’m supposed to keep them.”

“Give!”

“Locked up, out of reach.” He backs up as unobtrusively as he can, shuffling more than stepping toward the door. “Doctor’s orders.”

I jump to tackle him again. This time, I feel the fabric of his robes slip through my fingers on the way down and manage to somersault off some of the momentum before I can brain myself on the floor, and only end up with a bit of shoulder pain from the impact. I scramble up and follow him out the door, into the hallway, bemoaning my fate like a Tsis tomb zombie looking for Force-sensitives to snack on.

“My focus!”

“I’m not sure you should have these if you're acting like this at the sight of them.”

“Master!”

“They're a controlled substance.”

“Master!”

“I’m very concerned.”

I give up bleating a third repetition at him and shift my choice of battlefield, reaching out in the Force like I’m patting the floor around me to pick up a pair of glasses. The carpet is wool. His slippers are wool. They may not be from the same place but they’re still the same material. The slippers will be easier. They're felted. That’s just fluff pounded together until it forms a sheet of material.

I let him feel virtuous and victorious as he goes through the instructions the healers gave him. Like all drugs for children, there's a long list. Most of it's for his edification, not mine.

“Got it?” Sifo-Dyas finishes.

I blink at him, removing my focus from felt. It’s like coming out of a cloud. The soles of his slippers are now connected to the carpet, the wool very agreeable to the whole process of de-felting, unwinding, and then joining together so I could squish them together with the Force. Some people sculpt things. I modify fibres. Double-sided fabric wishes it were this interconnected.

“Got it?” He has the nerve to bring my pill bottle back out and give it a rattle.

“Got it,” I say.

Sifo-Dyas narrows his eyes. He shifts his weight in this Mandalorian stand-off we’ve created between us. I narrow my eyes right back and, deliberately slowly, raise one foot.

He flinches back as I lunge again.

His slippers do not follow.

He makes a sort of ‘glurk!’ sound and trips over his own feet.

I move with grace and decorum, practically gliding down the hall to fetch the bottle of my rightful stimulants. Sifo-Dyas swipes at me without much conviction and uses the momentum to roll onto his back.

“No convincing textiles that they’re hook and loop tape,” he says to the ceiling.

“All it to the list,” I inform him, settling down on the floor to examine my prize.

“Okay, now undo it.”

“I haven't gotten that far yet.”

“Padawan,” he groans.

I imitate his tone. “Master!”

[marcmarcmomarc]

Return to Gravity Falls

Jason Ritter

Kristen Schaal

Alex Hirsch

J.K. Simmons

Linda Cardellini

Dee Bradley Baker

Carl Faruolo

Niki Yang

Justin Rupple

Jackie Buscarino

Thurop Van Orman

Jillian Bell

Michael Rianda

Jessica DiCicco

John DiMaggio

Jennifer Coolidge

Stephen Root

Kari Wahlgren

Nathan Fillion

Kevin Michael Richardson

Keith Ferguson

Gregg Turkington

Will Forte

Matt Chapman

Alfred Molina

Cast:

Brad Abrell as Agent Trigger

Dee Bradley Baker as Waddles

Cecil Baldwin as Tad Strange

Jonathan Banks as Filbrick Pines

Lance Bass as Sev’ral Timez

Harry Belden as Blendin Blandin

Jillian Bell as Melody

Kurt Braunohler as Greg Valentino

Jackie Buscarino as Pacifica Northwest

Frank Caliendo as Sergei

Bobby Cannavale as Shermie Pines

Linda Cardellini as Wendy Corduroy

Matt Chapman as Abuelita Dolores Ramirez, Marius von Fundshauser, Mermando, Sev’ral Timez, & French Lilliputians

Greg Cipes as Craz

Jennifer Coolidge as Lazy Susan Wentworth

Jim Cummings as Pirate Lilliputtian

Grey DeLisle as Mrs. Gleeful, Clerk, Gourney, & Carla McCorkle

Jessica DiCicco as Tambry

John DiMaggio as Manly Dan Corduroy

Carl Faruolo as Grenda Grendinator

Keith Ferguson as Deputy Edwin Durland & Testosteraur

Nathan Fillion as Preston Northwest

Will Forte as Mayor Tyler Cutebiker

Alex Hirsch as Stanley Pines, Soos Ramirez, Fiddleford McGucket, Nate, the Gnomes, Sev’ral Timez, Wendy’s Brothers, Sir Lord Quentin Trembley III, Biker, Farmer Sprott, Mayor Beffufflefumpter, & Bill Cipher

Ariel Hirsch as Pacifica’s Friend 2

Larry King as Wax Larry King

Kyle MacLachlan as Bus Driver

Sam Marin as Celestabellebethabelle

Alfred Molina as Multi-Bear

Kimberly Mooney as Janice Valentino

Nick Offerman as Agent Powers

John O’Hurley as Knight Liliputtian

Patton Oswalt as Franz

Annie Potts as Mrs. Pines

Chris Pratt as Mr. Pines

Michael Rianda as Thompson, Lee, & Mr. Poolcheck

Kevin Michael Richardson as Sheriff Daryl Blubs, Ghost Eyes, Chutzpar, Leaderar, & Tats

Jason Ritter as Dipper Pines

John Roberts as Xyler

Stephen Root as Bud Gleeful

Justin Rupple as Robbie Valentino

Kristen Schaal as Mabel Pines

Peter Serafinowicz as Blind Ivan

J.K. Simmons as Stanford Pines

Fred Tatasciore as Pituitor & Glurk

Gregg Turkington as Bodacious T

Thurop Van Orman as Gideon Gleeful

Kari Wahlgren as Shandra Jimenez, Priscilla Northwest, Pacifica’s Friend 1, Polly, & Caryn Pines

Frank Welker as Gompers

Dave Wittenberg as Time Baby

Niki Yang as Candy Chiu

[bloodstainedtomes]

Elsen ocs as furries - ref pics pt 2

[wellabridgemeprincess]

“Please, I need to….-GLURK!”

[dailysabinasmuts]

Oopsie, did ĚŮ just accidentally ruin your orgasm? Oh no, all that dirty pervert cum is just leaking everywhere now, you poor thing! Maybe next time ĚŪ will be nice enough to let you jizz properly... oh you want her to clean you off, well make her! 😈

"Hey!- GLURK GLURK GLURK"

[wrencatte]

"I'm probably not going to do any of this year's whumptober," she says after she finishes a second fill.

I wrote this on my phone during a conference call so apologies for formatting and any weird misspellings.

Whumptober no 1. "How many fingers am I holding up?" feat! Robin!Jason and Disowing!Dick (that's not obvious though)

"How many fingers am I holding up?"

Jason groans, doesn't open his eyes to silently reply with one particular finger. Dick grins and huffs out a laugh. At least his personality is intact. The amusement fades quickly, though as Jason stays prone on the ground, his breaths slow and deliberate to keep nausea down. Blood soaks his hair and streaks across his forehead. He lost consciousness for half a minute, which is half a minute too long.

"C'mon," he grunts as he slides a hand under the base of Jason's skull, keeping it steady as he hauls the kid up. Jason makes an awful noise and keeps going, folding over to the side to retch. He lets out a soft sob, clumsily reaching for his head. Dick knocks his hand away. "Nope. Don't touch it."

"Glurk," Jason half groans, half gags.

"Very eloquent." Dick rubs circles between his shoulder blades as he retches again. Jason shivers, eyes squeezing shut tighter, arms tucked around himself. He takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, muscles untensing as the nausea lessens. "You back with me?"

"No," Jason says in the tiniest voice he's ever heard. He squints up at Dick. Even in the dim light, his pupils are very obviously not the same size. "Wha 'appened?"

"Bomb."

"...oh. Cool."

"Yep, super cool," Dick says, his own voice airy and light, not giving away the panic that is threatening to overtake take him.

Jason slumps against him, and he uses the opportunity to finally dig out a gauze pad from his depleted supply. He presses it to the wound on the back of his head. Doesn't ease him into it, just presses it down hard enough he can feel blood squelch. Jason cries out and shoves himself harder against Dick in an attempt to get away from the pain. Dick wraps an arm around his back to keep him place.

Head wounds bleed a lot, he reminds himself as the sick warmth seeps through his suit gloves. It's too dark to see how bad it is. The fact that Jason's awake and semi-coherent is a miracle and a half and makes him feel a little better about the severity of it.

"Stop," Jason slurs out, hiding his face against Dick's shoulder. "Hurts."

"I know, buddy. But I've got to stop the bleeding," Dick says as soothingly as possible. Jason whines.

He's only fourteen. Gods, it's like a punch in the gut. It's stupid to be so horrified by it, Dick was doing a lot more at fourteen than visiting his almost-but-not-quite-brother in his city, but it's all about perspective isn't it? Guess he now has a reason behind all of Bruce's outbursts from when he was Robin.

...

Oh shit. Is that why?

"I'm going to pick you up," he warns before his thoughts start going in the wrong direction. Focus on the here and now, Jason needs him to. "Try not to puke on me."

"...no promises," Jason mumbles.

Concussions, the gift that keeps on giving.

That's okay. Well, it's not because it's gross, but it's not the first time someone's puked on him. He carefully stands, holding Jason like he's a toddler instead of a teenager so he can keep pressure on his head -- he's so painfully light even after two years of eating Alfred's food. Jason swallows thickly but manages to hold everything down.

It's not until they're halfway to one of Dick's safe houses (not apartment, they're a little too bloody to risk his apartment, but a safe house? That's fine.) that Jason makes a small noise.

"'m sorry."

Dick doesn't reply right away, trying to puzzle out how they're going to get to the other side of the street without being noticed. He finally makes it over and tucks Jason's cape a little tighter around him.

"'Bout what?"

"Should've moved faster."

He closes his eyes briefly. The scene flashes behind his lids -- him shouting bomb! and Robin turning too slowly. Him grabbing his arm and trying to shove the kid in front of him as they try to run for it, and Dick moving too slow this time because the bomb goes off with Jason taking the shockwave too close and he goes flying.

Dick unknowingly echoes Jason's small sound, something that's close guilt and regret and pain. "Yeah," he agrees. "But I should've moved faster too. Not going to lie, Robin. This wasn't our best showing."

Jason snorts then groans. He goes quiet, and Dick can practically hear the cogs whirring.

"We're not on comms," Jason whispers a block from the safe house. Dick makes a questioning noise. "You called me Robin, and we're not on comms. You never do that."

Why did he have to pick now to go from semi-coherent to fully? Dick climbs the fire escape, his steps heavier than normal with the extra weight.

He's not wrong. Which is the worst part. Dick had been doing it purposefully, and then it became a habit. Only on comms would he call him Robin. Face to face, even in the suit, he was kid or Jason, ignoring every sharp "names" reprimand that came from Bruce.

"I messed up," Jason continues, "but you still called me Robin."

Dick slides his window open and contorts his way in, his back groaning about it. He puts Jason on the couch. The kid clings to him initially before letting go, slumping back even with Dick's hand cradling his head still. He blinks dazedly up at Dick, frowing and grimacing.

"You didn't mess up," Dick murmurs as he kneels to his level. It makes his shoulder ache from the angle of keeping the soaked gauze in place, but Jason sort of follows the incline so that helps. "You didn't mess up tonight. You didn't mess up about this. I did. I shouldn't have taken my anger at Bruce out on you. That wasn't fair."

"I took Robin from you."

Dick exhales slowly. "You didn't know. Bruce didn't have the right to tell you or let you be Robin, but that's on him. Not you."

Jason blinks slowly, in the dim streetlamp. Dick sees a glimmer of tears. Whether that's from pain or something else, he doesn't know, and chooses not to know to give Jason some privacy.

"Let's get you patched up."

"Are you gonna send me home?"

He should. He absolutely one-hundred percent should send him home, solely because of the injury. But, they still have two days of his three day weekend to get through. If the head injury isn't as bad as he's expecting, there's still a ton of civilian brotherly stuff they can do.

Dick leans Jason forward so he's not resting his head on the back of the couch and takes his hand away. The gauze sticks to his palm, drenched with blood, but the very edges are still white. Good sign.

"Nah. There's still a crap ton of things in Blud I want to show you. Can't do that if you're all the way in Gotham."

The smile Jason gives him is brilliant and bright, chasing away the paleness of pain. Dick can't help but smile back, charmed without meaning to be.

Now that's a grade-A Robin smile right there.

[conkreetmonkey]

(As you open your door, you see a small demon peering back at you gleefully )

(It appears they have been teleporting to different places to enjoy the festives of hallows eve, not caring for who or what they encounter next)

Conky peers out from behind the door. A demon? Materializing out of thin air with a puff of red smoke? This does not strike him as odd. He's just excited to have company. The door swings open.

Conky is cradling a large pumpkin in one arm and messily eating the guts with the other, as one does. The stringy orange innards contrast against his blue skin, and slimy gobbets of the stuff cling to his pink arm hairs. The splatter of festive autumnal gore extends up to a bit past his elbow, and covers his mouth and shirt. Evidently, he's been going to town.

"Oh, hey there li-" Conky starts through a chipmunk-cheeked mouthful of raw vegetable flesh, before remembering his manners and gulping it down before finishing his sentence. *glurk!* "-li'l guy! Aren't you just the cutest little thing!" He reaches out and pinches the small demon boy(?)'s cheek, smudging it with sticky vegan viscera. "Aww, all dressed up with you're little cape and- ooooh!" he coos, the apparent cuteness of his visitor only now fading in and having an effect on him. He was probably too lost in a pleasure-haze of pumpkin violence to think clearly, but with his mouth now empty, he sees now that the little monster at his doorstep is absolutely adowwable.

He still doesn't seem to mind the whole demon angle, even though there's a big neon red pentagram on the floor that seems to be leaking wispy tendrils of evil red gas into his poorly ventilated home.

"Oooh, I just gotta get you something special! Wait here, I know just the thing!" he says, eagerly rushing into the darkness behind him... hey, why are his lights off? No time to question that, he's back, now pumpkinless, and he's brought... a gun?? Yeah, that is just a straight-up gun.

"I got this thing a bit ago... some mean guys in the woods shot me a few times with it, then screamed and threw it at me and ran off... I don't really know guns, but I don't think there's any bullets in it, and I don't want it, so you can have it!"

Conky tosses the gun at the small demon, who must scramble to get a hold of it before it falls to the ground. The thing has clearly seen better days, the wood being worn and the metal being rusted... how long has he had this thing? Just how long ago is "a bit ago" in this scenario? Wait, did he say he was shot with it?

Before any of these questions can be pondered too deeply, Conky yells "Happy Hallowe-en!~" with a silly little singsong lilt to it, and his giant horrible door clangs shut, leaving the small demon alone in a dank, smelly stairwell.

[demdozeguys]

the glurk

[himbofication]

who up glurking and plapping their raw chicken