#gloria ftwd

[sombrashe]

[justinewt]

Meet Nikki Clark - FTWD REWRITE OC

[FEAR THE WALKING DEAD-MASTERLIST]

Do not use my character without my consent thanks <3

warning: arts and pictures you’ll see are not mine (I found them on pinterest) and the actress used to portray Nicole is Linda Cardellini, from Freaks & Geeks 1999-2000, Nicole is a character 100% created by me, Andrea but the style of the bio has been inspired by a bio found on a TWD Amino and bios made by director Guillermo Del Toro. Also the quote is from the song Heathens by Twenty One Pilots <3

And PLEASE, you are all very beautiful as you are, DO NOT feel bad about my character’s body/weight/height/measurements or anything, keep in mind that she’s fictional and living in quite extreme condition (it’s a post-apocalyptic setting, most wouldn’t be in good healt condition regarding their weight etc)!! And you are all beautiful humans <3 

AND Nikki has been through physical abuse so proceed with caution if this can trigger you, the abuse is not described in length but maybe some interactions or thoughts could trigger you, idk

Words: 3.3k (some flashbacks in the fic will refer to events mentioned in PERSONALITY and BACKGROUND but it's not big spoilers, unless you haven't seen the show)

NICOLE EMILY CLARK bio

INFORMATIONS

FULL NAME: Nicole Emily Clark (born Russel)

NICKAME: Nikki (she always wrote it this way everywhere, even when taking exams in school cause she liked it. She didn't like her name very much and with the outbreak, even less people actually called her Nicole. She liked to meet new people so she could tell them her name was Nikki.)

DATE OF BIRTH: 1991

AGE: 19 (Season 1-3//2010); 21 (Season 4//2012); 22 (Season 5//2013); 23 (Season 7//2014); 30 (Season 8//2021)

SEX: Female

ORIENTATION: Bi (but it's pretty irrelevant in the story)

NATIONALITY: American

ETHNICITY: Caucasian-American

ORIGINS: She’s of English, Scottish and Irish ancestry

OCCUPATION: Pre-Apocalypse: Former Student at Paul R. Williams High School; Volunteer Nurse; Former nursing school Alumni

Post-Apocalypse: Former Member of the Broke Jaw Ranch; //

FAMILY

PARENTS: Jean Russel and Harold Russel, deceased.

SIBLINGS: She has no biological sibling and was born an only child but she views Nick and Alicia as her siblings, tho she is closer to Nick.

RELATIVES: Unnamed relatives; Madison Clark (adoptive mother/legal guardian); The Clarks (adoptive family).

FRIENDS: Nick Clark, best friend (they knew each other since kindergarten and got into drugs together); Gloria (friends through Nick); Alicia Clark (good friends, not as close as she is with Nick tho)

PARTNERS: She never actually dated anyone before the outbreak (she was too busy dealing with her shit really)

PERSONALITY: In Nick's fashion, Nikki is a flawed teenager who suffered from heroin addiction. She suffered throughout her life and was made fearful, reserved and with an obsessive fear of abandonment by the two people who were supposed to care for her, until she was taken in by Madison. She and Nick were in their own bubble, one dealing with deep trauma and the other dealing with his father's distant anq rather neglectful behavior, which started to get worse after Nikki joined their family but Nick never blamed her. Their addiction often caused trouble for her newfound family, who suffered because of this, and their attempts to stop this further resulted in more failure and even though Nikki was the first to get cleaned, it bested her and she stole drugs before the outbreak, but this was the last time she ever took some, unlike Nick.

Unlike Nick, who can put his life on the line because of his addictive behavior, her more fearful persona led her to be more careful and quiet. She observes people and mentally assesses situation, making plans, or things like that, in her own head. She has trouble sharing her ideas with others, but she really doesn't speak much in general. She does things and moves around in silence, often taking people by surprise when they eventually notice her presence. She second guesses herself a lot and has very little trust in her own abilities which leads her to having a rather low self-esteem and confidence.

Like Nick, she is smart and the both of them are the first to understand that the infected aren't actually "infected" but rather dead. She is also, like him, quite selfless and always helps around. With her nurse training, she never thinks twice before offering medical help to people, no matter who they are; like at the military compound after Madison put a spoon in Troy's eye, leaving it bleeding and swollen. She treats him, though she, unsurprisingly, does so in silence, ignoring his stares and questions and barely talking to him. She wasn't afraid of him but rather felt somehow uncomfortable.

Something else she shares with Nick is that she can be impressionable and easily led by people with a stronger personality, such as Victor Strand, Celia Flores, Madison or even Nick himself, because if he led by someone else, she will most likely follow in his steps. As an example, after leaving Celia Flores' home, she is quite confused and lost and starts listening to Victor Strand. After they arrive at the Broke Jaw ranch, she starts disliking Jeremiah Otto because he reminds her of her father when he raises his voice. She gained a little in confidence at this time and since Madison wants to deal with Troy, she says he seems to like her and she will get close to him but really, though she didn't like him, she wasn't sure how to feel about him. With a dark charisma and a stronger and more unpredictable personality, Troy kept her on her toes. Maybe she, subconsciously, liked the instability of it all. She never knew if Troy was going to be normal or a total asshole.

After the dam incident, she almost drowned and it gave her PTSD. She became scared of having water up to her torso as well. The loss of Nick totally wrecked her and she felt as if she had lost her heart. She had a very hard time mourning the one she called her best friend and brother. She totally switched after that and became ruthless and cold towards most people and she would cry in private.

APPEARANCE: Nikki is a young woman of short height, standing at 5'3" (160 cm), an inch more with her shoes on, and has a quite petite figure, especially when she wears oversize clothes and her big khaki jacket that she's had since high school. Except in summer, she usually wears vintage looking sweaters with a t-shirt underneath and a pair of baggy jeans with black classic converse. In summer she switches her sweaters for a raglan shirt with black or red sleeves. She wears one as a pajama as well.

She experienced huge weight loss from her heroin addiction which landed her at the hospital as well as rehab, her face got sunken making her look a bit older than her age.

⚠WARNING - TONS OF SPOILERS AHEAD⚠

BACKGROUND: Nikki, of her full name Nicole Emily Russel was born in 1991, to Jean and Harold Russel in LA, California. Her family had been living in the States since the 60s and she was second generation to be born and raised there. She was born in a very pious and strict Christian household and had a complicated relationship with her parents growing up. Her father repeated learned behaviour from his own physically abusive father and would hit her quite often to “discipline” her, and her mother was very passive regarding those unjustified punishments, enabling him. In first year of primary school, Nikki met Nick Clark. The two got sat next to each other in class and almost immediately became friends. Because of that their mothers started talking as they would come to pick them up from school, joking about how similar their names were, Nicole and Nicholas, Nikki and Nick. Like they were two sides of the same coin. When her mother talked with Madison Clark, Nikki saw a completely different side of her, a façade really, that she put on to pretend that she was a nice, good person, and it gave her false hope that her mother was actually what she pretended but when they would get back home, the yelling and beatings would resume and her mother would sit by and do her thing, not caring about it.

For the longest time, Nikki thought she deserved all this and that it was a normal life. She had to keep it a secret because her father told her that if she told anyone, bad people would come and take her and lock her away forever. So, she spent years being terrified of being separated from her parents. It was her worst fear. She somehow managed to keep the various bruises on her body hidden because she would never go to the infirmary, and she would not take part in PE classes because her left leg had been fragilized after being broken. This time around, it had nothing to do with the abuse she was put through. There was a tree in the backyard of the house -which they had cut down after- and when she was around 6, the summer before she went back to school, she tried to climb it and fell. Because the year she met Nick, she had her leg in a cast, she needed assistance and the teacher had assigned him to help her around. That was the actual beginning of their friendship. He was the only one that she then allowed to get close to her because she was so shy and quiet around other people. She never spoke in class.

Her leg remained in a cast for two months and in October ’97, it was removed. During those past couple of months, her father barely laid a hand on her and she almost got used to it. She thought he had stopped being violent altogether because she was hurt and he cared for her but once it was taken off, he started hitting and spanking her again, only keeping himself from going too far because her mom told him they would have the social services on their ass if it got too obvious. At school, she was dispensed from physical activities as her leg was still healing but even 6 months later, in March ’98, she still had some troubles with her leg. Over time, the doctors saw that the leg remained fragilized though she was healing well and to prevent her bone from breaking again in the future, Nikki was told to avoid doing sports. Every time they did a sport that involved running, she couldn’t, the rest of the time, she carefully dressed to cover her body, even if she had no noticeable bruise. It became a reflex as she grew up. For the rest of their primary school years, no one never knew what she was going through. She only ever wore pants and long-sleeved t-shirt or jackets. Even Nick, for the longest time, never saw her arms or legs uncovered.

By the time they turned 14, Nick’s relationship got complicated with his father. That’s when Nikki started rebelling, when she was 13, and she ran away one night, she managed to make her way to Nick’s house and climbed to his window. She ran away that night specifically because in the evening prior, she got into a huge fight with her father, and he gave her a black eye and busted lip. At first, he didn’t realize she was hurt because she wasn’t saying anything and it was dark but when he turned on his light, he was appalled and shocked. She tried to play it off saying she was assaulted by some guy on the street and ran off, but he wouldn’t believe her. He kept trying to find out what happened and she wouldn't tell him, she would just ask him to help her, and he did, but she didn’t want his mom to know, saying that things would get more complicated. He tried to go get stuff to tend to her face, but he accidentally made some noise and Madison woke up. She saw her son with his hands full of compresses and other things and she came into his room but by then, Nikki had heard them talk and got scared. She climbed back out the window and ran off. She didn’t know where to go. She was completely lost and had no idea what to do. If she went back, Madison could help but she was terrified to be taken away from her parents, and if she went back to them instead, she was terrified of what might be done to her for running away and telling people about what was happening.

She was even more scared of staying on the streets and eventually went back to her parents, in hope that they didn’t realize she had run off in the first place. She found the window still up and when she got in, she saw the door was still locked. She couldn’t sleep that night, but she was so exhausted that she fell asleep without even realizing. She woke up when she heard a key turn inside her door’s lock and her mother came into the room, her phone in her hand. Nick and Madison had been trying to call her the whole night and asked her what this was about. Nikki pretended she had no idea and asked if she could get her phone back, but her mom refused, telling her that she was going away to Christian camp for the holidays, without her phone. That morning, Madison and Nick showed up at their house, asking about Nikki. Madison had understood something was off and she was careful with her tone and words but still, Jean didn't let them in, saying Nikki was still asleep, when in reality, she was simply locked up in her room. She eventually closed the door on them and they slowly walked back to their car when Nick casually went around the house and saw Nikki's silhouette behind a thin curtain at a window on the second floor. He could tell she saw him because she walked away to hide.

Nick went back to his mom and urged her to call the police. He told her what he saw and as he had already told her about the injuries she had last night, she dialed 911 and called for a wellness check on Nikki, saying they had suspicion of child abuse. She pressed them to come quickly and said she feared for the 13-year-old's life as she thought her parents might try to take her away today. She couldn't give them many information on the situation as she had no idea what really went down in that house but she knew for a fact it was bad. Nick was walking back and forth, worried sick for his best friend and he and his mom stayed in front of the house until the police came, in case the Russels tried to leave. After a few minutes, a car finally arrived and Nick instantly walked up to the two officers that got out. He was frantic and they told him to calm down as they walked up to the door and knocked. Jean opened. Her husband was actually not there because he was at work. They talked with her for a moment, asking about Nikki, telling her they needed to see her but Jean, with this warm smile assured everything was fine. They insisted but she argued back. At some point, Nick was so done waiting he abruptly slipped inside the house and ran up the stairs. Jean yelled at him but it gave the opportunity for the two officers to finally enter as Nick was upstairs, ramming Nikki's door after he found it locked.

He called for the officers who ran up to join him and they ordered Jean to unlock the door while Nick tried to talk to the girl inside but she was curled up in a corner of the room, frightened by all the noise and fearing her mother would get mad at her if she spoke. Jean eventually gave them the key, quite reluctant to do so and they opened. Nick went up to her and hugged her. She started crying and was then taken to the station where they called CPS on the Russels. Because of the black eye and busted lip, they radioed for a medic unit to come meet them at the station. They had to leave because Jean was being hysterical and demanding to take back her child, saying this was all nonsense. Madison and Nick insisted to come along to provide Nikki with support while things were being dealt with and the officers let them. They sat with her and Nick looked like he was glued to her, holding her against him the whole time. He felt as if he had failed her by letting this go on for so long. The medics arrived, took Nikki's vitals and tried to ask her a couple questions but her lips were sealed.

From Nick's statement, who was the first to see Nikki last night -Madison was told after, she didn't see her right away, it could only be considered hearsay-, she already had the injuries then but when Nikki was asked about it, she mumbled, bit her lips and didn't really say much. She was taken to the hospital to be checked by a doctor when she finally said her father had done this to her. Her claims were backed by the police report that the officers filed after conducting the wellness check and photographs were taken before treating her. When CPS finally responded to the report filed by the police, they spoke with them, as they were the ones who called and then interviewed everyone involved, starting with Nikki who they had to really put at ease for her to speak. Given the emergency of the situation, Nikki was not brought back to her house and as she had been already removed from her house, they sought a court order. With an emergency guardianship ruling, Madison was allowed to take Nikki with her while CPS conducted their investigations on the Russels. Madison almost immidietaly registered the Clarks as foster carers, to make sure she wouldn't be moved to another family. In the weeks and months that followed, there was a number of court audiences and Nikki's parents lost custody and their parental rights were terminated. Madison and her then husband were deemed the best to take care of her from now on and became her legal guardians, though Madison really embodied that role, her husband not so much.

There were regular visit from CPS workers assigned to the case to assess how the Clarks were adjusting to the changes and if Nikki was well. She was sharing Nick's room and his bed had been switched to a bunk one. They were long term best friends and had always been like siblings so they were really happy about the situation. Madison eventually started to think of adopting Nikki and she spoke to ther latter about becoming a Clark too. A court date was eventually set to finalize the adoption and within the year, Nicole Russel became Nicole Clark. By then, Nikki's parents had been sentenced to prison for child abuse. Her father, who struck her was sentenced to 6 years in prison and her mother, who let this happen and would lock her in her room, removing all means of communication with the outside world every night, was sentenced to 2 years in prison. They were also forbidden to go anywhere near their child.

After what happened, she had become even quieter. She was there for Nick as his relationship with his own father got difficult and they both eventually began hanging out at the abandoned church where they would shoot up, both falling into addiction, at just 13 years old. The next five years proved draining for everyone. When they were 14, Madison found out about Nick's addiction and he covered for Nikki and for a while, they only knew about his addiction but after he went to rehab for the first time, it became obvious that she suffered the same affliction and thought it best to send her to a different rehab facility than Nick. Nikki didn’t like it but unlike Nick, she didn’t complain about it. He was upset about it and criticized his mother for separating them, but she stood her grounds. To her, not being around each other for a time could only help them. Of course, when they would get out, they would genuinely try not to do drugs again, but the addiction would prove stronger than their willpower each time. From then on and for the rest of their high school years, they were in and out of rehab. They somehow managed to graduate despite everything, which led them to miss school quite often and she went to rehab for the umpteenth time. She was accepted to nursing school and by the time the first semester ended, she was expelled for stealing drugs from the infirmary. She had no prospect of any kind of a future so she found a job at a gas station and not long after, the outbreak happened. She was at work the day things went down.

[FEAR THE WALKING DEAD-MASTERLIST]

[themuselesswriter]

The Serpent and The Desert Shark

Characters: Original female character, Troy Otto, Jake otto, Jeremiah Otto, Nick Clark, Madison Clark, Alicia Clark, Coop, Mike Trimbol

Summary: Troy Otto is the well-known psychopath of Broke Jaw Ranch, only he truly isn't, and once a complete stranger arrives out of nowhere he begins to explore a whole side of himself, he has no idea how to process his feelings and to his own bad luck, the woman has more baggage than him.

Join the adventures of Troy Otto while he discovers what it's like to be crushing over someone, and May's crazy past that sounds more of a badly written fanfiction than a past.

Word count: 21076

Warnings: death, abuse, drugs addiction, usual apocalyptic problems

A/N: I had this sitting in my drafts for a while now so I decided to curse you with the curse of wasting ten minutes of your lives with another weird fic about a female Original character taking over a show plot and making it all about her, btw I suck at self-advertising so... I hope you guys enjoy it and let me know what you think! PS: This isn’t abandoned, more will be published soon!

Credits: viking - polarr filter by me, photos from Pinterest

————————————Teaser———————————

It was a normal day, as normal as an apocalyptic life can be in the Broke Jaw Ranch, everyone was busy running their errands, sustaining their sanctuary, earning their keeps, and Troy was no different, just because he was their leader's son doesn’t mean he lived like some sort of a high born, he wasn't his older brother, as the leader of the militia he had to set an example of how dedicated he was to their people, twice the work, twice the pressure and the responsibility.

Sweat dripping from his forehead as he knelt in front of the hole in the fence, a boar managed to make and destroy some of the crops, a work of art, Troy thought, it was fascinating how the animal only took what it needed, how it found out the weakest spot in their fence, hidden and fragile, if he didn’t trip in front of it by mistake yesterday he would’ve never found out and the animal would’ve continued the little mischief, ripping them of their rashes.

“Troy” a voice interrupted his peacefulness, he looked up at the familiar face, Coop, he squinted his eyes to shield them from the sun “what is it?” The other man seemed distressed and nervous, Troy noted however, Troy wasn't known of being a patient man “well, good thing we have all day” he said sarcastically, Coop took a breath “a woman just showed up out of nowhere at the gates” he said with a careful look, studying his leader’s expressions, Troy, unimpressed “a dead one?” The other shook his head “no, alive, bleeding but alive” he answered “my dad?”, “he thinks she’s a threat” he replied.

The blond groaned and stood up tall, placing his pieces of equipment aside, he took off his protective gloves and wiped the sweat away with the back of his hand “lead the way, let’s go see who that mystery woman is” Coop nodded and the two walked to the crowd, his father and brother were bickering while the woman glared at them from behind the gates, and as Troy walked closer the words became clearer to him.

“We can’t just leave her dad” jake fought, big Otto wasn’t a fan of his son's comment “she’s from the borders, I will not have a filthy Mexican in my lands!” Unphased, Troy decided to look at the woman instead, her brown hair lifted in a ponytail, her eyes green and angry, he’s never seen anyone that looked quite angry to be at the Ranch rather than happy or scared, her skin was milk and she was injured, she wasn’t older than he was, stabbed in her lower abdomen, he took a step closer to the gate “what’s your name, Ma’am?”

The woman looked at the youngest Otto, then back at the two arguing “May” she replied coldly “Okay miss May…?” He asked waiting for her to fill the blanks “it doesn’t matter” she replied, Troy, chuckled “I guess it doesn’t, my dad thinks you’re Mexican, are you?” He asked again as the two men continued their argument, their words are mere noises to Troy, he could care-less of what they had to say “I’m an American citizen, I was in Baha for a business deal”

Troy nodded understandingly then told the men to open the gates for her, his father cursed at him “she’s not Mexican and she’s injured, you’re the one who said we don’t leave women stranded” he explained, his father wasn’t happy about it at all “she stays in the cells until she recovers and Troy… she’s your responsibility” he then left the site “I’m sorry about my dad, he’s a survivalist, he thinks every stranger is a threat” Jake said when the coast was clear “he’s right” the woman replied, sending everyone to a state of silence.

“I’m jake and this is my brother Troy” the older introduced, but the woman just stared at them with zero interest “we should get you to the infirmary” the brunette said, desperately trying to kill the awkward silence “no need, just get me booze and bandages” she said firmly “your wound might get infected and you might die” the blond one replied “It won’t” she insisted.

The two boys shared a look as if they were communicating among themselves to figure out what to do with the woman “alright, I’ll take her to the cells, you get her the stuff, if she dies in the cells it’s on her” the one who’s named Troy said, already moving to grab the woman’s arm, she glared at him and pushed his hand away “I’ll walk myself” she hissed, the brothers shared a look again, Jake nodded at his brother then the blond started walking, the woman followed.

They remained quiet, no words were said, the brunette woman looked all around her, noticing the weird looks she was getting from the habitants, answering them with scowls, this place looked like heaven during the time of apocalypse, her old place was a huge storage unite, she’s never seen a farm that survived the dead for so long, those people were a bunch of lucky assholes.

“You know… most of the people would be thankful instead of being hostile” the blond man started, gaining a scoff “thankful? Your dad was going to leave me for dead just because I came from Baha” she replied, pressing her hand to the wound, part of her wondered for how long they’d have to walk, but another wasn’t going to show weakness, she needed them to fear her, those people were strangers, their intentions were unknown “well, we don’t get visitors very often, you see, this place is nirvana and many try to take it from us, we have to be careful”

He tried to explain but the woman said nothing, too focused on the pain in her abdomen, he stopped in front of a large building and talked to a guy in military clothing before a door was open, he motioned for her to follow him and so she did, he opened a cell gate for her and she walked in, immediately sitting on the bench, resting her legs “it would’ve been easier if you went to the infirmary first” the blond said as he closed the door, looking at her from behind the bars “I’m here to take what I need and leave” she replied “and what is it that you need?” she shrugged “a clean wound, a bed and few meals until I recover”

“What makes you think we’d provide that?” Troy said amused “I wouldn’t be here if you wanted me dead” the man smiled at her and nodded “you’re something” he shook his head in disbelief before he walked out, leaving the woman with her own thoughts.

Continue reading

[ivebeenmade]

Lexi Johnson saw babe’s funko mod of her! @nywythwndblws​

[roseguidedarc]

 @leftlimp​  DIDNT ASK , but is getting one anyways. 

     ❝  you’ve only heard his point of view.  you   𝐃𝐈𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐀𝐒𝐊   mine !  ❞

[ftwd-nicky]

Unbroken

Pairing: Nick Clark x Reader

Author: @ftwd-nicky

Words: 2394

Author’s Note: Ayooooo two updates in one day...kinda? Yes! You saw it here first! I got the feels of this fic while watching season 1 and yeah. I really hope you guys enjoy it! If you have any requests, feel free to send them to me through my ask box!

I stood outside, watching the soldiers guard the large gate that was placed around the small neighborhood, sighing to myself as I go over to Alicia’s house. I knocked on the front door, waiting for a few seconds before going around back, looking around for her.

 “I found this on the counter.” I heard Madison’s voice as I stood on my toes, looking over the fence, seeing her standing by the edge of their neighbors pool, talking to… Nick.

 I leaned my forehead against the wood of the fence, sighing quietly as memories of us flood through my mind. I haven’t really been the same since Nick broke up with me to be with Gloria and to do drugs.

 “Oh, yeah I guess I forgot.” Nick told his mother and my eyes fluttered shut, feeling the butterflies in my stomach. God, I still love the sound of his voice.

 “Oh you forgot?” She asked as I walked through the gate, standing behind Nick as he took off his sunglasses, looking up at his mother.

 “Yeah, I guess I did.” He muttered as my eyes connected with Maddie’s. She gave me a small smile as I returned it. I stood patiently as her attention was back on her addict son.

 “Well here it is.” Maddie mentioned and Nick placed his sunglasses in the little cup holder of the floaty, resting his hands on his chest.

 “Oh, no thanks. I’m good.” I rolled my eyes, shaking my head as I listened, staying quiet.

 “Nick,” she warned, sighing slightly as he flipped off his floaty. I swallowed thickly, my eyes staying on him as he swam towards his mom. “I don’t think that’s the best idea.”

 “Well I gotta kick it. That’s the whole point, right?” Nick asked before continuing, “look, just give it to Griselda. She needs it more than I do, you said so yourself.” His voice rasped out, rubbing his hand over his face, pushing some hair back.

 “I know what I said, but the point is to wean you off slowly. So, it just doesn’t happen again.” Maddie told him as she accentuated the word “slowly.”

 “I thought you’d be happy. I know Y/N would.” He trailed off and I frowned, crossing my arms over my chest. Her eyes met mine again as I glanced at the concrete, pressing my lips together.

 “I am happy. I just…” She was cut off by Nick splashing, moving away from the side of the pool. “Alright, well if you need it it’s right here.” Maddie muttered placing the pill on the side of the pool. She walked back to her house, leaving Nick and I alone, even though he has no idea I’m here.

 I stood there for another minute in silence, watching him swim on his back before I decided to speak up. “So, you’ve kicked it, huh?” I asked and he jumped, turning around.

 “Jesus, Y/N. How long have you been standing there?” He breathed, swimming towards me, leaning his arms against the edge of the pool.

 “Um, for about five minutes. I-I was looking for your sister.” I muttered, shuffling my feet a bit. Nick patted the spot in front of him, motioning for me to sit. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea, Nick.” I muttered, my heart breaking slightly as he gave me a look.

 “Come on. We haven’t seen each other in over a year, please.” He begged and I sighed, slipping my shoes off before sitting down next to him, slipping my feet into the cool water. “How have you been?” Nick asked and I shrugged, debating if I should tell him that I’ve been a complete mess.

 “I’ve been alright. Not believing this is actually happening and that I’m just dreaming.” I muttered, swinging my legs in the water, staring at the ripples I’m making.

 “I wish I could tell you this was a dream.” He whispered, his fingers tracing mine that are laid against the concrete. My heartbeat increased, my gaze moving to his fingers that are playing with mine. I pulled my hand away, resting it in my lap as I gave him a sad look.

 “I’m going to go find your sister. If you haven’t completely kicked it, please take the pill.” I whispered lowly, getting up before slipping my shoes on, heading back towards his house. Once I got inside, I leaned against the sliding door, letting out a huff of breath as my eyes fluttered shut. I’m not in love with you still. I’m not in love with you still…

 Tears slid down my cheeks as a sob escaped my throat, never realizing how hard it’d be to see him again. Someone placed a hand on my shoulder and I looked up, seeing Alicia standing in front of me.

 “Hey, what’s wrong?” She asked me and I shook my head, sniffling.

 “I-I saw Nick for the first time in over a year.” I whispered, looking back down at the floor. “I didn’t think it’d be this difficult.”

 “Of course it’s going to be difficult. You still love him, Y/N.” Alicia muttered, rubbing my back softly. I shook my head again, whispering to myself.

 “I’m not- I’m not in love with him. I-I don’t…” I trailed off, “I shouldn’t be. Not after what he did.” I sighed, rubbing my fingers through my hair.

 “I know, I know.” She softly smiled, rubbing my arm as we walked towards the kitchen sitting down at the table and I laid my head in my arms as Alicia rubbed my back softly. We sat there for about ten minutes, hearing the glass sliding door opening as I kept my head down, not wanting to interact with anyone.

 “Y/N?” I heard Nick’s voice and I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking my head.

 “Nick…” Alicia trailed off, hearing silence between them for a few seconds before hearing her speak up again. “Now’s not the greatest time.” She muttered.

 I picked my head up, looking up at Nick as his hair was all over the place, staring down at me. His expression saddened once he saw the tears streaming down my cheeks and I got up from the table, leaving their house. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, walking across the street towards mine.

 “Y/N! Wait!” I heard Nick yell and I picked up my pace, walking faster as I barged into my home, closing the door before Nick could get inside. “Y/N, please let me in.” He begged, wiggling the door handle as I locked the front door.

 “Nick just go home.” I muttered, leaning my forehead against the door.

 “No, not until I know you’re okay. Just because we aren’t dating anymore doesn’t mean I don’t care about you.” He told me, his voice muffled by the closed door between us.

 “Sure felt that like you didn’t when you picked Gloria over me.” I whispered, silence growing between us, wondering if he had heard me or not. I sighed, glancing through the small window not seeing him standing on the other side anymore.

 “That’s not fair.” His voice came from behind me, making me jump as I quickly turned around, my back pressed against the wooden door. Nick walked up to me as I felt my heart hammering against my chest.

 “It’s not fair? Of course it’s fair because it’s the truth, Nick!” I spat, narrowing my eyes at him as he sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

 “The drugs I was taking was a factor of me leaving.” He muttered and I scoffed, pushing past him.

 “Or maybe you realized that you could do better. That I wasn’t good enough for you.” I whispered, glancing up towards the ceiling as I tried to keep the tears in. “I was never good enough for you… was I? Why did you even go out with me?” I asked him, turning to face him as my arms were crossed over my chest.

 Nick walked towards me slowly, gazing down at me as a frown formed on his lips, shaking his head. “If anything you were too good for me, Y/N. I asked you out because I really liked you, I had for years. Every time you came over to hang out with Alicia I could barely keep my eyes off of you. I honestly didn’t think you’d stay with me once you found out I was an addict.”

 My eyes glanced up towards him as he stood inches from me, his fingers delicately touching my arm. He watched me with cautious eyes as I didn’t pull away, my gaze now on the floor. “I stayed because I thought I could help you and because I was already in too deep. I-I loved you, Nick.” I whispered, tears sliding down my cheeks.

 Nick’s hand touched my cheek, his thumb wiping the tear off of my face as his eyes stared into mine. My eyes fluttered shut, feeling the butterflies in my stomach as I could feel his breath hit my face.

 “Nick, you should go.” I muttered, frowning as he tensed up a bit. I glanced up at him as he removed his hand from my face, nodding his head a bit. I gave me a small wave before leaving the house, walking back over to his. I let out a breath of air, sitting down on my couch as my heart clenched in pain.

 I laid down on the couch, hugging myself as tears kept sliding down my face, staring at nothing in particular. My eyes drooped growing tired as I saw the sun beginning to set in the distance, falling asleep with Nick clouding my thoughts.

 I jolted awake upon hearing frantic knocks on my door, glancing at the clock that was hanging on the wall, noticing it was after nine at night. I rubbed my eye, getting off the couch as I walked over to my door, opening it slightly. “Alicia?” I questioned, seeing her standing on the other side as I opened it all the way. “What are you doing here?”

 “You have to help me. Nick… he locked himself in the bathroom and I can’t get him to open the door.” She breathed, running a hand over her luscious locks.

 I narrowed my eyebrows together in confusion. “W-Why do you need my help? Maybe he doesn’t want to talk to anyone.” I muttered, rubbing my arms.

 Alicia sighed, rubbing her hands over her face. “I-I just, he had a bruise on his face and I want to make sure he’s alright. I know he’d let you in. Please.” She pleaded and my lips parted. Did someone hit him? I nodded my head and she smiled, both of us walking back to her house.

 I stood in front of the bathroom door, staring at it as I composed myself. You can do this. I brought my hand up, knocking softly on the door.

 “Go away, Alicia.” Nick muffled voice rang out and I bit my lip softly.

 “Nick? It’s me.” I mumbled, listening closely as I heard the door unlock. I opened it slowly, seeing him standing by the sink, hugging his arm. I walked inside, closing the door behind me as I stood in front of him, faintly seeing a bruise near his eye. “Who did this?” I asked, reaching for it but he turned his face away, staying silent.

 “It’s nothing. What are you doing here?” He asked me, not keeping eye contact with me and I licked my lips, rubbing my cheek.

 “Um, Alicia told me someone hit you and I was worried…” I trailed off, intertwining my fingers together as I rocked on the balls of my feet. “You okay?” I asked and he shook his head.

 I frowned, stepping closer to him as I wrapped my arms around his neck, cooing into his ear. My eyes stung a bit as he cried into my shoulder, his arms laying against my waist, tightening his grip on me. My fingers ran through his hair, pressing my nose into his shoulder as my other hand rubbed his back.

 “I still love you.” Nick whispered, my heart skipping a beat as I closed my eyes, letting out a deep breath. “I’m so sorry for what I did, for what I’m doing.” He muttered and I stepped away from him.

 “What do you mean? What are you doing?” I asked, confused at first until realization hits me. “No… Nick y-you told me you kicked it.” I whispered, tears pooling in my eyes.

 “I-I know and I tired. I really did. It’s hard, you know that.” He muttered, staring down at me as I brought my hand up to his cheek, I softly run my fingers over the bruise feeling him flinch slightly under my touch. “My mom did it.” Nick whispered and my eyes widened, breath hitching in my throat as I stared at him.

 “W-Wha-” I started when Nick cut me off.

 “She found me over at the Ramirez’s house looking for, you know and she just…” He trailed off and I pulled him into a tight hug.

 “It’s okay.” I whispered and Nick’s hands rested on the back of my thighs, picking me up. I squealed, tightening my grip on him as he set me on the counter. My stomach churned, butterflies being released as his fingers softly ran over my cheekbone. “N-Nick…” I whispered quietly, my breathing becoming a little heavier as his face gravitated towards mine.

 “Could you ever forgive me?” He asked, his breath hitting my face as I nodded my head “yes” immediately.

 “Yes. I shouldn’t be after what you did, but I’m still in love with you.” I muttered, our foreheads resting against each other’s as he softly laughed, his thumb rubbing circles on my cheeks.

 “God, I love you so much.” Nick grinned, placing his lips on mine. I smiled lightly, kissing him back as he took my bottom lip between his lips. I placed both of my hands on his cheeks as his moved to my hips. He pulled away, rubbing his hand towards my lower back, smiling down at me. “I never realized how much I missed kissing you until now.” He whispered against my lips, a toothy grin on his gorgeous face.

 “I love you.”

[corruptedson]

//just gonna put this out there since the dead ( minor ftwd characters ) are rising: someone making a gloria blog

[lacallemojada]

Nick flashbacks in Grotesque s02e08

[walking-dead-icons]

Nick and Gloria in Fear the Walking Dead 1x01 “Pilot” and 2x08 “Grotesque”.

Gifs by: walking-dead-icons.

[cursedwatershq-blog]

i'll pay anyone to bring me a gloria from ftwd !!

. * ┆ ‘  YES PLEASE, bring us gloria from the walking dead !!