#giving up on formating because tumblr fucked it up like 3 times already im going to kms 😭😭😭😭

[icantspellthings]

Esquire Singapore (2019)

[rulerzreachf4n7]

(If you're just trying to find some cute ship art for like lumity or huntlow and you find this I'm sorry I just want this to get some recognition cause I'm new to the Tumblr community 😭😭)

Hello there and welcome to me rating different TOH ships!

It'll be in a format like a iceberg chart, the more well known ships at the top and more unknown and obscure ships in the middle and below

Also know this is my opinion and I have given reasons why I don't like and ship the ones I'm going to list, don't get mad at me cause I don't ship whatever the fuck you like

And with that let's go!

The surface

1. Lumity 9/10

Actually a really good ship, I don't know why people keep on saying it's a toxic/unhealthy ship, the only reasons they say is that they lie to each other,Amity somehow "hurts" Luz and never gives her a proper apology...? Im sorry but it's fucking stupid, there's other reasons but I don't remember them, I gave it a 9/10 because it's okay, nothing astonishing or amazing, just good wlw rep and that's all that matters

2. Huntlow 100000/10

WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE HOW MUCH I FUCKING LOVE THIS SHIP OMG!!!! I wish it could have gotten confirmed or more hints throughout the show (I personally think it would have been a cool idea that after kings tide Hunter and Willow started dating and it would be shown in TTT) it's just a really cute ship to me and I love everything about it >_<!!!

3. Raeda 10/10

It's a really cool ship, but I was confused on the whole is Eda bisexual or pansexual thing cause she's confirmed bisexual but Raines non binary...and now supposedly bisexual people can be attracted to non binary people??? It's just hella confusing to me, but that's a topic on it's own for a different time, I really like how they developed and definitely TTBK was and is one of my favorite episodes

4. Veesha 8/10

It's actually canon that Vee has a crush on Masha and thats all I need to know...GAHHH IT'S SUCH A CUTE SHIP!! Really cool thing how Dana is adding some much non binary characters in the show (NOT including the collector cause he's demiboy NOT non binary, there's a huge ass difference) wish there could have been some development/hints in the WAD, sadly not, but that doesn't mean it won't be confirmed!

5. Gustholomule 8/10

By far one of my ships but sadly not on the top 3,yet again, needed more hints, especially in s2a cause Gus and Matty had more screen time and interactions together,and I love how the fandom just agreed Matty was gay, and not to mention the friendship with Matty and Amity

6. Belpaw 10000/10

this is a joke ship between Belos and springtrap/William Afton from fnaf but it's absolutely fucking hilarious to me and I love it

Now, time to go under the surface, here are some ships that some people know/ship but not much people do, and the further I go we'll get to the more...problematic ships, yet again, don't get mad at me for my opinions

1. Lunter -100/10

Please block this account immediately if you ship lunter I CANNOT STAND THIS SHIP!!! Sure, they had some pretty decent chemistry and interactions with each other, but it just won't work! There's no use in shipping a character with a canon love interest/already dating someone and just choosing to ignore it and ship them anyway, PLUS FOR THOSE SHIPPERS WHO ACTUALLY GOT FUCKING MAD CAUSE IT DIDN'T BECOME CANON I'M ACTUALLY SHITTING BRICKS ON HOW FUCKING STUPID THAT WAS 💀💀💀💀 plus Willows a canon love interest to Hunter, Zeno, HUNTERS VA, literally changed his name to Hunter noceda, and no it's not wlw erasure, but if you acknowledge the fact that lumity is canon, if you acknowledge the fact Dana put her hardwork and effort trying to get a same sex couple in a kid's show which literally got it CANCELLED, and still ship it, disrespectfully shut the fuck up, lunter would be canon if FUCKING NETFLIX MADE TOH 😭😭😭

2. Huntric/Huntmira -100000/10

I. Hate. This. Ship. I put them together cause I didn't want to make seperate sections for it, now you're gonna read me rant on how much I fucking despise this ship, number one, EDRIC IS FUCKING DATING SOMEONE, no interactions (only one with Edric but none with Emira) the mfs literally degraded him in labyrinth runners, no chemistry whatsoever, its overall just not worth your time, and I'm not a toxic huntlow stan, no I won't force the ship on you, however I will block you because I don't want that shit on my feed, same goes for lunter and the other ships I'm gonna mention

3. Luz x Willow, Amity, or all of them together 5/10

Ngl, it's not that bad of a ship, actually really cute, but I couldn't see it happening in the show given that lumity is already canon, plus we should normalize healthy friendships between two girls, not everyone needs to be shipped and the toh community has a huge fucking problem with that, plus this also goes for Amity x Willow as well

4. Camila x Eda (i dunno the official ship name 😭😭😭) 5/10

It's mid, I SAID IT I SAID IT!!! *hides in bed* I'm sorry the ship is mid, raeda is canon already and they didn't have any dialogue, interactions,chemistry together only other than people want Camila to date/marry someone,and the only part when they actually meet is in WAD and that one picture of Eda showing Camila the Apple blood, other than that it's meh, eh, mid

5. Boscha x literally anyone -1000/10

Disrespectfully shut the fuck up if you ship boschlow, boschmity, or boschluz, THESE ARE EXTREMELY TOXIC SHIPS AND YOU'VE PROBABLY NEVER EVEN WATCHED WING IT LIKE WITCHES OR THE ENTIRE FIRST SEASON OF TOH, YOU MUST HAVE SEVERE BRAIN DAMAGE IF YOU THOUGHT THIS WAS OKAY, Boscha is literally their bully, IT'S NOT THE ENEMIES TO LOVERS STORY YOU WANT POOKIE, the only one that isn't as severe is boschmity, that one, unlike the other ships isn't as bad cause boscha genuinely likes Amity and if you watched FTF you'd know why, plus boscha must had have the fattest crush on Amity, but the only boscha ship good is Boschbria (Boscha x Bria)

6. Veenter 10-/10

No...why must I have come to this...NOOO!!! okay, first off, ima just put this in the most direct, black and white, simple way, it fucking sucks, no interactions that support the ship, no chemistry, like I said, I'm a raging Huntlow stan, this ship is unacceptable, plus I like found...a potential r34 comic of them BUT WE DON'T NEED TO KNOW THAT HAHAH....oh fucking god...

The pit, here lays all the problematic ships, also uhm TW maybe??? I am gonna use words like p3dph1l1a, @buse, Child @buse,and pr0sh1p alot, so if it makes you uncomfy just a warning, and with that, lets go...

1. Camphip -infinity/10

I HAVE A RAGING HATE FOR THIS SHIP OH MY FUCKING TITAN, okay, I know Camila is an adult and belos is...well he's an old fucking geezer,but the age gap gives me the ick, but let's just start, it's @busive, Camila literally said she wanted to beat him up in the beginning of FTF, AND I DUNNO, DO YOU THINK A 400+ GENOCIDAL EMPEROR WHO @BUSED 50+ GRIMWALKERS WHO COULD HAVE POSSIBLY BE KIDS (and by kids they'd be at least 11/12-16, still pretty younge though)MANIPULATED MILLIONS OF WITCHES AND DEMONS, AND KILLED HIS BROTHER IS A GOOD HUSBAND/BOYFRIEND MATERIAL? disrespectfully shut the fuck up, given the fact of think Luz, Vee, and Hunter are all Camila's children (or at least that's what I headcanon) DO YOU THINK THEY'D BE HAPPY TO KNOW THAT THEIR MOTHER IS DATING THE PERSON WHO CAUSED THEM SO MUCH FUCKING PAIN AND ABUSE????ESPECIALLY HUNTER, BELOS FUCKING SAID HE DIDN'T EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT HUNTER IN HOLLOW MIND, CLOUDS ABOVE THE HORIZON,AND IN THANKS TO THEM, HE LITERALLY TRIED TO K1LL HIM, THIS SHIP WOULD ONLY BE FINE IF IT WAS IN A GOOD BELOS AU, THE ONLY WAY, I will immediately block you if you ship Belos x Camila, I hate it HATE IT AND I'M DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS

2. Amity x Gus or Hunter -infinity/10

You're lesbianphobic, go fuck yourself if you ship Amity with any male characters

3. Empgold/Huntlos -infinity/10

It's pr0ship, p3d0philia, and @buse, Hunter is 16 and Belos is 400+ years old, you can't ship a character with someone's who dead so it wouldn't matter if you ship them after the time skip when Hunters 20, Belos @bused Hunter, the scar on his cheek and the whole fucking possession scene in TTT might give you a hint, Belos never cared for Hunter and only saw him as a tool, he tried to k1ll him in Hollow Mind, and in Thanks to them, if you ship them, I am blocking you, and I say this proudly

4. Guster -infinity/10

I. Hate. This. Ship, AND FUCK YOU GUSTER BUBBLE BATH YOU FUCKING MADE ME HATE IT EVEN MORE (please don't question what the guster bubble bath is, DO NOT SEARCH IT UP IT IS AN R34 COMIC...unless you wanna get traumatized, but it's cool baby girl) I hate this ship, there's plenty of interactions, but they give off a more sibling energy,and that's a reason why I don't ship it, I see them as siblings, I get they could somehow date cause of cosmic frontier but it's more of a similarity than a romantic aspect just like with Amity and Luz with the good witch Azura,its also uhm *COUGH COUGH* p3d0philia if you ship their time skip versions (Hunter is 20 and Gus is 16), the reason why I put it so low is because I feel like it's not as well know but not as obscure (plus I did this all rushed so I had no fucking time)

And ladies, bros, non binary folks, that's the end! You've endured all my criticism so take a damn break, you deserve it

And special credits to ships I didn't include!

Luz x Anne/Marcy (Amphibia)

Hunter x Sasha (Amphibia)

Gus x Willow

Gus x Bria

Luz x Marco (svtfoe)

Gus x Vee

Luz x viney

Edric x Emira

Eda x Belos

Eda x Darius

Amity x Marcy (amphibia)

Belos x Luz

The Collector x King, any member of the hexsquad

Amity x Odalia

Eda x Dana

Darius x Raine

Belos x Kikimora

Kikimora x Puss in boots (oh god yes that's exists)

Aaand....

Lilith x Belos/Hooty/Steve/Eda!!!

I hope someone at least read this cause I made this in a damn hurry!!!

[verycharismaticdragon]

Hey what if I did, like, a lets play of On Air Island but! an interactive one where we collectively choose the next option (via a poll) would anyone play with me

Um yeah to expound on that thought

What's On Air Island?

On Air Island is a game I'm currently brainrotting about.

The genre is stated as horror/thriller but even if you're not a fan of these genres id say still check it out because im not a fan either and Yet

This is perhaps because the game has a strong mystery element and encourages multiple replays/going back to try out different options (theres a really comfortable to use mechanic for that too!) so theres this drive to uncover more of the story. Which is why I'm still playing despite having finished all 40 endings already (yes, thats forty endings)

Quick plot blurb: the plot follows the cast and crew of a survival show called 'Never Stop Watching!' set up on a remote island. The show's unique setting is that every cast member streams their experience, and the winner is determined by the number of donations they receive on their stream. However, the island is not as simple as it appears, and soon enough the rankings will be the least of the cast's problems! (Que horror/thriller elements)

Why interactive Let's Play?

The thing I found the most refreshing about OAI is that you, the player, do not play as the protagonist, but rather as one of the viewers on the protagonist's stream. When the absence of 'i would not fucking say/do that' experience hits lol. Because of such setting, aside from the main cast, the presence of Observers - the fellow viewers - is strongly felt throughout the story as well. EzraHanse girlies in the chat you will always be famous. And... sometimes other Observers have completely different ideas about what's good for blorbo from your streams!

Then, since I run a poll aggregator blog and see like hundreds of polls a day, the vision of in-game choices and tumblr polls overlapped in my brain...

...and I thought, hey, wouldn't it be extremely atmospheric and true to in-game experience to have a bunch of people chipping in to determine the advice and tasks the protagonist receives from his viewers? Thus, the idea of doing an interactive lets play was born.

What are the pros of participating in the Let's Play, instead of just playing the game?

Well, first of all, this is absolutely my dastardly plan to make y'all play the game, make no mistake!

That said, if you aren't sure you are interested in playing it, you can experience the story in bite-sized chunks (i just vidded the prologue up to the first choice, and its less than 2 minutes!) on a semi-daily basis, with a little dopamine hit of clickin' the button at the end <3

Another thing is that making 'a donation' - ie, a choice in game - requires in-game currency. There are various ways to farm currency and there are almost always cheaper choices available, however! Since I already played and replayed multiple times, I have many choices unlocked, and it'll be easy for me to farm for the remaining ones. Especially now that I got all the endings and the desire to find the best one no longer plagues me so. So - you can experience the game while avoiding the grind!

And, ofc, as I've mentioned before, having many viewers/Observers would be very true to the atmosphere of the game. Ideally, I would hope for some discussion in the comments too, to parallel the in-game chat! This is also why I hope people who already played the game will participate too 👉👈 The more Observers we have the better, right? ;3

What if I don't vibe with watching videos / miss something / etc?

I'm planning to have a transcript available for each video, and something like a story-so-far post that you can check out to get up to date at any point. I also figure I'll be adjusting the format along the way, if we can get this party started at all, so feel free to suggest improvements to me at any time!

[m0e-ru]

👀👀 also i just want to say thank you! i really got into P4 this year and finding your work only amplified my love for it. mim became like my 2nd favorite character all because of you also the stage play it really lives in my head rent free. i love your art and writings, your work has turned a special interest into an even more special one.

hi yeah I read this morning I was tearing up a bit sorrry for being an emotional baby I dont get love letters often maybe thats why im full of love . in exchange. thank yo thankyou for all the nice words it means a lot. here’s A LOT in return. with commentary because it um. was too much for the tags

okay this one was one of the drafts for my 3/20 art this year there was like. four drafts till i settled on this one then went SIKE 🏌️🏌️🏌️ you're doing the dual type ones ( the magazine ones i ended up posting )

MIDNIGHT TV STATION REAL !??? anyway here’s just shadow yukiko and iznmi interaction it’s not finished since there’s no backgrounds yet I swear there are. I did this alll the way back in feb I think and just kept polishing it bit by bit throuhgout the year and it’s STILL not done yet. the horrors came in I couldnt work on bigger pieces anymore since they wouldnt even get FINISHED anyway 💥💥💥 there’s also a s.kanji one but those are a bunch of blobs and text in shorthand mim is such a jokester asking questions n shit to twist people’s heads but yukiko’s just so sweet she really means what she says yknow like this is supposed to be the start of mim remembering what humanity is besides the mindless and selfish desires that technically gave birth to them after tearing them apart from the whole they once were. the LAST few TV stations these women were asking shit like ohhh can we hang a noose here ohhhhhhhh I want it to smell like liquor and rust and this girl was like can I have a castle !!!! can I wear a big pink frilly dress and hold a mic to push my human self’s buttons I think it could work

yeah these are my plans for the m.inaba arc for gsaslau and FUCK IM SO MAD I WAS WRITING ON THE TUMBLR EDITOR BUT IT FUCKED UP THE FORMATTING AND A WHOLE CHUNK OF TEXT IS GONE sorry this post is gonna be a lot longer than it should be okay ! gsaslau Magatsu Inaba arc. Adachi’s besties with the attendant but Mim decides they’re done with the attendant facade and erases everyone’s memories of the guy. They did a bad job at it though so Adachi’s stuck with the awareness that he has a hole in his life that could’ve been avoided if someone did a better job at cleaning up everything that reminds him of memories he’s going insane over thinking they exist when they DON’T to literally everyone else. He makes a deal with the fog to be god’s prohpet and usher in the New World as its Fool so it gives him the answer to whether or not his memories are real and worth bringing back a guy he thinks is dead. Souji tries to stop him and as much as Adachi’s trying to hide his true intentions under the guise he’s justifying himself as a bad guy this whole time, he kinda snaps under pressure that a bunch of kids are being able to stop him despite the help of a god and a world he can manipulate. Mim’s plan was to wait for his Shadow to take over so his body’s properties would be enough for him to become a vessel to manifest Ame-no-Sagiri. But THAT doesn’t happen so they did plan B: go force the power of Persona and wear it like a costume enough to hide their face to stop further awakening more memories that could throw the whole deal off. Souji recognizes that it isn’t the power of Persona so he demands god to stop using their powers through a human just to hide from something, it’s putting the guy in enough pain already. Mim agrees to leave and Adachi’s Shadow finally takes over anddd and yeah I could make a separate post about my writing I wish I had more time and energy for things

okay this one looks simple it’s likeee a manga that was supposed to be a companion piece to some writing that also didn’t get finished. so. I could share that but they’re non proofread discord messages but I promise the draft is there the context is that they’re in Okina and they try out the gacha machines. Mim’s genuinely having fun but they pull a teru teru bozu which um. remind them they’re supposed to dutiful god. like they look like a teru teru bozu. and that they’re supposed to treat this as an experiment to see humans’ true desires so they just shove it to Adachi who harmlessly relates it to them because it honestly looks stupid annd the whole tension dissipates.

here's also a bit of writing alll the way back in feb. i guess the context would be episode 13 and 14 where nanako leaves her loveline umbrella with the fox except this time she doesnt get wet since she had a pit stop at the gas station yaayy :mimyay:

The little girl left her umbrella by the torii with the fox as a gesture of her kind heart. Then she hugged the plastic bag in her arms and began to run straight home.

The rain was pouring hard! The summer wasn't as kind as her, nor would the crashing showers that would come after days of blazing heat.

Every step she took quickly became squickly and soggy as her shoes and socks were already soaked through. Her pigtails were getting heavy and her bangs almost covered her eyes. Just then, she heard a voice in the rain. But before she could look, she slipped forward.

"Ah!" Nanako gasped as she let go of the bag and braced for impact, but heard another "ah-h!" as she was quickly hoisted up with an arm wrapped around her chest, picking her up and felt another arm underneath support her. Her chin now on broad red shoulders that smelled faintly of car exhaust and gas amidst the rain.

The splashing of shoes on the wet pavement along with the crinkling sounds of a plastic bag was heard. Nanako was more worried of whose perfectly dry clothes she drenched with her sopping wet ones.

"You okay, little kiddo?" a familiar voice asked as she was gently set down on dry concrete away from the rain.

"I'm okay," she said, wiping her bangs and looking straight at the stranger in front of her.

It was Moel's gas station attendant, the one Souji works with. "Ah, you're big bro's big b--" she quickly shook her head, "I-I mean, big bro's senpai."

"Heh," the crouched man laughed weakly, it even seemed like he forced that smirk. "I work here too, y'know? Little customer."

"Oh, I'm sorry. And thank you, mister attendant."

"You're welcome, and don't worry about it. 'S not like I'm too mad about it."

An awkward air accompanied the scents of lingering exhaust from the last car and the petrichor from the rain. Although Nanako didn't feel any of this, just to say. It's always been like this with big bro’s senpai, at least how it's been with just Nanako herself. Like right now.

The man continued to crouch and adjust his hat. "Well, you're a silly girl. Why's someone with flowers all over her papers running around in the rain?"

Dunno how long, but I hope you haven't been running around like this for too long. I know you live nearby but your big bro's gonna have to take care of you if you get sick!--I mean, he'll always take care of you. He's a good kid.

If you were out long, I'm impressed how much of this you kept dry! …Just hoped you could've done the same for yourself, hehe.

Ah, but knowledge's different than wisdom, or whatever mister detective said. Hm, he even said I had neither! Maybe that's why I didn't know?

Uh…well….the fox by the shrine…. it was getting wet, so I…

Hm…

Heh, 'can see how you and that kiddo really are alike, little kiddo.

and SURPRISE !!! i found this lying around i thoughtt id add it here because youre so nice and it's so lovely to see you in my notifs all the time THIS IS A JUMPSCARE FOR EVERYONE ELSE sorrryyyy sorry

[dameferre]

Hello miss dameferre on tumblr dot com I just wanted u to know that I read wooing the water tribe recently and it's literally one of my favorite fics ever now so thank you sm for writing that masterpiece. That said I also consistently think about an au of it in which zuko thinks sokka is dating azula for some reason and has the mother of all breakdowns bc I think it's peak comedy

y’know it’s really inconsiderate of people on this site to consistently have better ideas re: my fics than me

though okay tbf i think that fic would be like. 10 times more angsty than wtwt and i really don’t take my own writing seriously enough to write angst but oh my GOD what a fucking concept.

so. what i’m imagining. the fire nation is hosting one of those post-war ‘sorry we committed genocide’ reparation celebrations, but sort of like the olympics? there are bending tournaments, and physical sport tournaments and archery and swordfighting and shit, but there’s also a tournament for like. strategy shit like pai-sho and other nameless intellectual competitions

and the gaang are all helping organise these events and eventually competing in them, but azula is forbidden from using her bending (still relatively soon post-redemption) so she throws herself into organising the strategy competitions, with sokka. and these two like. lose their Minds trying to out-think and out-strategise each other. and no one else can come close; sokka’s out-of-the-box, fucking ridiculous genius shit the only thing that could challenge azula’s ruthless genius shit.

so azula and sokka are just going back and forth with each other, making puzzles and logic problems and all kinds of ridiculous shit, constantly challenging and one-upping each other and meanwhile. Meanwhile. zuko’s trying to organise the firebending tournaments on his own and technically, sokka’s meant to be helping him with the swordfighting tournaments (it’s not an elle zukka fic without a sparring scene!) and was really looking forward to having all this time to spend with him, but sokka’s always off trying to be smarter than azula. and one day sokka shows him this like. 3-d puzzle maze he made or something and is like ‘oh, azula’s gonna love this’ and zuko’s like- wait just one fucking second

anyway, cue zuko being like. what the fuck sokka. azula, really?!?!? but he’s trying to be a supportive best friend bc that’s what sokka and zuko do, and then of course (probably with toph’s help) zuko realises the reason he’s so upset sokka’s in love with azula is because he’s in love with sokka, because that’s the fic format and im sticking with it! so this is obviously where it gets angsty because zuko’s spent his entire life fighting to measure up to azula, for whom things come naturally, and then of course the guy he’s in love with has chosen her, and im sad just thinking about it

meanwhile tho sokka’s bricking it trying to figure out how to ask out zuko (because im sorry but the ‘i thought we were already dating?’ without any kissing or formal dates only works if it’s zuko thinking it) and asking azula for advice, and azula, obviously, exclusively gives terrible advice because she thinks it’s funny. so we have zuko trying to be happy for sokka and distance himself from him, and sokka trying to woo him in the worst ways possible thanks to azula (i’m not saying sokka surprises zuko with an elegant meal, the main course of which is the popular upper-class delicacy of fried turtleduck, i’m just. thinking it loudly)

hilarity ensues, yada yada, then at the end when they’ve finally confessed their undying love for each other, sokka’s like ‘how the good fuck did you not know your sister’s a lesbian and already in a committed relationship with a woman’ and zuko’s like ‘she’s a what’ because zuko has never once in his life understood or picked up on social cues from a human woman.

roll credits

[survivor-mesopotamia]

Ep. #1 - “hail santa that is all.” (Chrissa)

Nothing much really so far. We got into tribes so far everyone seems cool ans all so can't wait to see what happens from here.

Opening thoughts: I'm very much downplaying my knowledge, making it seem like I care most about challenges, know nothing about how online Survivor works (I played and hosted one) and not a massive amount about the actual show either, asking a lot of questions. Trying to find people with the most similar personalities and let others propose any alliances.

boy am i overwhelmed

Day 1; So I'm sitting here, eating dinner, a salad with garlic bread and a mike's hard pineapple strawberry lemonade, and I decide to do a confessional! Lets talk about my tribe, first and foremost. We're the "Second Chances" tribe. Fitting, we're all FLOPS. Imma do this in the order we were REVEALED to the world. Because that's cute, right? We're basically the beauty tribe bc everyone is lowkey real scrumptious lookin. Eric; Before this game, Eric and I bonded in the Ahkmim VL about how we never get cast for tumblr survivor, and how we're waiting for redemption, and I'd feel bad leaving him as the first boot. So hopefully he'd also feel bad, and wanna talk to me. I don't think the two of us have much in common yet, he's into anime, and reading, which is like, two things I'm not really down for, but I'm definitely gonna give Spirited Away a try sometime soon so I can talk to him about it. I kinda wanna ask if the red in his hair is naturally like.. blood red. But maybe that's the lighting in the room, or maybe he died it even MORE ginger, because I often hear to him referred to as GINGER Eric, but also i don't wanna have an awkward "No, this is just like.. normal ginger" conversation. Megan; Ohhhh Megan.. my girl Megan. We've had a rocky road in our friendship, and I wish I was just talking about ice cream. Something about her though just makes me have infinite patience for the things the two of us deal with, I can't help but just want to be with her all the time. I scouted her out from FaceBook to play my Whodunnit, and we've been extremely close ever since, our game relationship has been rocky enough for me to worry slightly about her, but all I can do is trust her, and build good enough relationships with other people that if she tried to fuck me over, I would know, and strike first. Its still unclear to this day whether she had a hand in my elimination in a Big Brother game we played, 1984. What is crystal clear, is that we cried together while she cast her vote to evict me. I love her, won't never stop lovin her. I'm hoping this can be OUR season to dominate, because I feel like we're almost evenly matched when it comes to a jury vote. Will; "Whoop-de-do" iconic king of not getting his haircut. Uhh.. idk what all to say, because before the game, I knew nothing of this man. However, Monty said something about him being alive and on Skype, and my mind immediately goes to "Is he hot?" and I check his profile, and publicly announce that he's hot. Which isn't FALSE, but then we both get revealed for the game, and put on the same tribe. So now we're vibing, and relating on the fact that tumblr players hate us, and we've deemed each other, "Heather". He's currently petitioning to call our tribe "The Heathers" instead of Enlil. We get on really well, and he's pretty damn cute. Also, he goes to bed SO early, I hope we get enough time to talk and get close on this tribe. Julian; Well. This is a lot to unpack, but I found out he was playing about 3 days before the game, and since that point. He's gotten unnecessarily aggressive with me, and a couple others over non-tumblr related matters. Julian and I have a rocky history, between me being recruited, and auto-casted for his ORG, Trinity Survivor, his ex-co-host/current-best friend berating me, and deleting messages to make me look bad. To Julian throwing passive aggressive low-blows about my social ineptitude in my face if I'm angry about something, to us making final 3 together in minis. Overall, I'm constantly at odds about how I perceive our relationship, I want to be able to assume the best of him, and say that I'm good in his book, no matter what happens. I think a lot of the time, our friend group isn't the most mature, and it is really difficult to have an adult conversation with someone from within that friend group, without someone else having an opinion to share on it, so I've heard things that he's said about me, that I'm not necessarily sure if its true or not, but I try my best to hold a strong, level head and smile whenever I see him, but sometimes its difficult wanting to approach a conversation with someone head on, but knowing that you can't do that with him is definitely a struggle of mine. We have very different communication styles, and its difficult to see past it sometimes. For now, I'm going to be working with him, but I'm not sure how long that can last, as he admits it himself, he can only handle my personality for short periods of time. Jack; Well, Jack hasn't said a single word for the last three hours, since the game has begun. I don't WANT to have to stay up till 5-6 in the morning to try to have a conversation with him, but if that's what I gotta do, then that's what I gotta do. Chrissa; Chrissa, Todd. My LOVE. Chrissa is someone that I owe something to, she's amazing, beautiful, talented, show stopping, never before seen, etc. Our game relationship is not great, because I organized her first boot in Ascendance Season 4; Back to the Future. However, it was because she was attached to someone that kept accusing me of having powers behind my back. So, hopefully Chrissa forgives me, and gives me another chance, because I'd love to work with her. I feel like Chrissa is someone who is extremely intelligent, and loyal, and that's someone I want on my side. I love my tribe, lets win every challenge until the merge!!

Well... I’m back again... not going inactive this time! Let’s just do a quick roundup for now: JJ seems to think we’re in a showmance already which is either great or bad for my game, Megan’s a sweetheart and I could see us aligning, Eric is definitely a gamer and I have a feeling he’ll be a loyal, jack and Julian are both pretty straightforward and seem on the quieter side, and Chrissa straight up vanished already so we’ll see how that goes! Basically somebody thinks I’m their husband but I don’t know if I ever signed the prenup, but if it means JJ is gonna spill on how he feels about everyone then that’s some good insight. Nobody really wants to talk game yet but that’ll change soon!! Kk bye for now

Night 1/Morning 2: Everyone on my tribe seems extremely cool and I'm loving the way the tribes are divided. The only name I recognized on the cast was Monty's and he's on my tribe! I don't know him personally but I think he first played around when I was hosting a season. I have hit it off with Johnny the best so far I think, and definitely Isabelle as well. I seem to have a lot in common with both of them on a personal level. Strategically, I haven't locked anything down yet. I don't want to come right out and blurt "ALLIANCE?" with anyone; for right now I'm just trying to play it cool, get to know people as well as I can, and be a likeable presence in the tribe so people just wanna have me around.

I just asked Collin to talk to Adam about forming a four person alliance, which Collin will "bring" me into while Adam suggests someone. This might secure me in a four person alliance which would be ideal, but if it backfires, it will backfire on Collin, not on me. I'm trying to get myself into a majority while insulating myself from being seen as the strategic threat

First confessional before first IC

I was thrust on a good tribe we have JJ and Eric and hopefully this group of people won't make us last in competitions atleast lol maybe if we lose though hopefully i can argue why jack needs to go with his timezone but hopefully i don't have too. 

im ngl idk why i decided to play tumblr survivor again and the instant paranoia of just caring about my PLACEMENT is going to keep me up at night *shivers*

It's been a day in and so far I really like our tribe! I'm vibing with a few of them and it looks like there's been alliance formed between myself, Julian and JJ. JJ has said that he owes it to Chrissa not to vote her out if we lose, and I think he has something with Megan on the side based off what Julian has told me. That leaves Will and Jack, and I've talked with Will a ton. Tomorrow I'm gonna try and see if he wants to work with me too because I feel like to win this season, you will need to keep all your options open. 

Day 2: I got to talk to Jack last night, he was talkin about how he did some funky fresh survivor statistics on how tribe swaps affect tribe line loyalties, which I found super interesting. Then I decided to share a statistics thingy I did on how the Final 3 format doesn't produce an even ratio of male / female winners, but the Final 2 format does, and how potentially something about the final 3 format in survivor could be a factor in why we haven't had enough female winners in the last few generations of survivor. But he didn't even believe there was a female bias in survivor.. which kinda threw me off. Oh well, we ended the conversation on a good note before I went to bed. Well, the tribe seems to be getting along well, I tried to get a tribe call going, but it ended up just being me and Megan helping Chrissa with strategies to get higher scores in the challenge. She can't seem to break 100, and I feel really bad for her, I hope the rest of us can carry this competition, because I would feel like the worst human being in the world if I gave someone first boot twice in a row. Not to mention I'd consider Chrissa a friend of mine. Maybe I'm playing this game a bit too emotionally, before we even have our first tribal. What a concept.. Will and I are only getting closer and closer, we continuously refer to each other, affectionately, as "Heather". But he really lied to me today, pretty hard core. He said he was gonna order his weight in mexican food when he got off work... but he ate Thai instead...? How dare he ??? Rude. Anyways, if he's lying about that, what else could he lie to me about? Smh. Fuckboys amirite? I think that if we lose this challenge, Jack would be an easy vote off. He's in a different timezone, and his age unfortunately would make it really difficult to have a decent social game. If we lose more than once, there's one of two things that could happen.. 1.) There's a standoff between Julian, Megan and I, trying to maneuver this tribe to remove each other. Which is exactly why a friendship / showmance / whatever with Will is so important. Will would likely be the swing vote they try to get, I don't see Chrissa voting me out if I prove my loyalty at the first tribal our tribe faces. 2.) The three of us dominate the premerge portion of the game, and it becomes an impossible to maneuver situation for me at the merge, because all the connections I have outside of my own tribe, both Julian or Megan also have a hand in, with the exception of Jay, who I don't find myself falling that closely to. I feel like I might be thinking too much, too fast. I guess I just can't show the rest of my tribe that. I'm hoping my reads on the tribe are at least somewhat correct this time around. :/

Collin never ended up messaging Adam, and I was worried about falling behind the 8-ball, so I took alliance building measures into my own hands. I messaged Zach about joining up by stating that Collin had told me he also had a good conversation with Zach, and I made sure Zach didn't just feel "brought in" by asking him which person he would want to be 4 in our alliance. He suggested Cameron, which is fine by me. He hasn't officially reached out to Cameron yet, but our plan is to bring Cameron in if we end up losing, and I will probably want to vote Kyle or Grace in that scenario. Hope we don't lose though!

I don't really (or at least usually) stress about challenges and definitely not this early in the game, but some of these people are so stressed and panicky. Will (who I talked to about aligning earlier today like I had said I would in my last confessional) is stressed about not being able to beat his current high score of 199 and feels like he's on the lower end and might be eliminated. I was telling him though that this isn't necessarily about your score, but your ranking. You can get 209 or 189 and still get the same ranking. Chrissa on the other hand is totally panicking. She has an admittedly low score of 89 which she forgot to screenshot which is really rough. She same flash games aren't her thing (and I believe her) but when I tried to calm her down and say there's lots of time to improve and that we can win this, she continued to panic. There's not much I can do for her. I'm not aligned with her right now and she's just really scared to get first boot, which I don't even think will happen. JJ feels obliged not to make her first boot should the scenario present itself, and I'm aligned with him and Julian. If anyone's going home right now, it's probably Jack unless he has connections I am unaware of. I would really like to win though because I love our beauty tribe xoxo 

I managed to find the idol clue, and in telling my formed trio of Collin and Zach, Zach accidentally revealed that he had found it too. I don't think he intended to tell me, so now I am not sure if I fully trust him. I'll work with him for now, but he is going to be a big move player and I'll have to watch out for that

Forgive me father for i have sinned it's been a day since my last confession I've made some progress me and grace knowing each other well pregame means i have an instant ally coming in to help not be first.....or second out and me and Collin seem to be kinda working together I guess?? I hope not fully sure but I feel confident I'm not going if we go to tribal.

hiiii so glad to be back in the game!!!! So thankful I have the opportunity to redeem myself after my huge flop in 94, but lowkey worried about being on the An tribe? Only because it is filled with people who have done well in the past I’m not sure how to measure where I fall within them, but everyone has been very nice and seems to get along with me so far! Also it seems like there is no suspicion from them about Zach and I being siblings which is STELLAR. From looking at the cast I think the only person who knows for sure is JJ, and perhaps Megan? But thankfully they aren’t on a tribe with either of us so that might work in our favor. I’m a little nervous about this first challenge but I have one of the highest scores on my tribe atm, so I feel like if we go to tribal it might be okay. Fingers crossed hehe ;))

FUCK entanglement! FUCK IT IT IS THE WORK OF THE DEVIL hail santa that is all.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBoZlL8ZWzY

Zach is playing super hard out in the open. That is good for me, he can make connections to help our alliance, and if there is ever a moment where our alliance gets exposed, he will probably be out in the forefront as a target. The flip side of that is that I might not be able to go to the end with him if he could be perceived as the leader of my alliance, so I'll need to see how the game develops

We came in second in the immunity challenge by ONE POINT. Thank the lord because our group seems very cohesive at the moment, and going to tribal would have put everyone into scramble mode. I've been bonding the closest over the first 4 days with Isabelle, and I am hoping it can lead to a strong game relationship. Right now, we seem to be very social with one another and we have gone as far as to say we wouldn't vote for one another, but I'm still sort of waiting for that defining confirmation (as much as you can get that in Survivor). After that, I'd say I've been pretty chatty with Johnny and Monty equally (but I think I have a slightly tighter personal bond so far with Johnny). Abrielle I talked to more so over the first couple of days but I would say between her, Jay and Madison those are the ones I've made the least connection with. They all seem like good people, just haven't had as much traction chatting with them. I don't want us to go to tribal for as long as we can help it, because for me the best case scenario heading into a swap would be if our tribe had the numbers advantage and some sort of tribe-wide unity going into it. I feel like that way I could be in a good spot but also not in the forefront of the tribe alliance (I'd hope that would sort of fall on Monty or Johnny maybe because of their Tumblr Survivor experience). For now though, just continuing to get to know everyone as best I can and try and make sure people want me around, and have me in their plans moving forward.

https://youtu.be/2ix-llpzUOQ

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https://youtu.be/bwCjV8my_Zc ok my mom walked in so i didn't get to finish my thought, but i guess the full thought is just: what the fuck? like i'm really gonna be watching this vid on repeat while y'all are just trolling us. this will end up in my nightmares. know that. also my paranoia is once again setting in. as i mentioned in previous confessional, i feel like ben and i have bonded the most, and we've both pointed it out to each other, but now i feel like he's pointing it out... almost too much? he's basically comparing our convos to his with the rest of the tribe and that they're much better (which i lowkey agree), but something feels fishy because again IM PARANOID. AM I BEING PLAYED?? like literally the scenario in my mind is that everyone's aligned except me and ben has been chosen as the bug to make me feel comfortable. okay yes im crazy. and it's only day 2 whew! im going to bed goodnight.

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ok now ive found a video about spectograms the channel has liked. this hunt is getting me anxious bc slowly but surely the amount of views on the immunity idol vid is increasing. AHHHH

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ok i found the spectogram and it literally spells out "SINK." (also this shit is scary so again, my nightmare comment holds.) so there are 5 other followers, which makes me know for sure that at least 5 other ppl have found this vid. also i have no idea what to do with the word. i assume that it'll come in handy eventually (maybe a password? send in a chat? comment on the vid? something?) and i really really hope im the only person to find this. i know that's unlikely tho.

---

oh my god. oh my fucking god. the clue is at survivor-mesopotamia.tumblr.com/sink . im screaming. proud of myself. BUT of course it says... "clue Though you have found it, No clue has emerged. UNDER CONSTRUCTION, Come back when you’ve merged." i- i have to wait until i've merged. HA. we'll see if bitches get that far. and im bitches. anyways sorry for the spam, now back to your regularly scheduled programming

Day 3: I almost forgot to do this confessional. But here I am, in bed, watching Avatar, and drinking butterscotch milk with Irish cream, which is surprisingly good? Anyways, here we go! First, you’re telling me that we LOST the challenge.. what the hell :( I thought I did so well having 188, but apparently even 256 wasn’t going to cut it. The fact that if Jack could improve his score by 30 points, means we’d be safe from tribal, it annoys me that it felt like he didn’t try as hard as Chrissa in the flash game? Julian, he says we can beast through this game and make final three. This is something I’d really love to be able to trust that he has in mind, but I just am unsure at this moment. He gave me information towards the idol search that I appreciate, and probably wouldn’t have figured it out myself. That felt good, but I feel like he wasn’t giving me everything he knew, just enough to make me feel comfortable. I’ll have to continue to keep my eye on him.. Next, Heather, or Will, my potential showmance. We’ve finally got the opportunity to call each other, we talked about the idol search, and our potential moves in the future. He told me he likes the idea of not playing with Julian, but right after he told me this, Julian asked if we were good? Which was kinda sketch. But I’ll do my best to trust Will, and call it a weird coincidence. Megan hasn’t talked to me much today, but she was a room moderator for sequester, and was visiting a friend today, so I can’t blame her. Chrissa is hopefully safe, I can’t give her first boot in back to back games together, I refuse to be that heartless. She’s so good I can’t do it. Eric hasn’t talked to me much either. For someone who should probably know that his name is on the block, I’m surprised Jack isn’t talking too much to me? Maybe it’s because I’m on the chopping block and I don’t know it. I’d be really heartbroken if I were the first boot.

So we lost the challenge by ONE FREAKING POINT, which sucks ass. But not me doing the best in my tribe on the challenge. We stan improvement. Anyway, it looks like the discussion for the vote is between Jack and Chrissa, namely Jack. Though Chrissa performed worse in the challenge, she's done a better job connecting with the rest of us than Jack has. As of now, that's what the general concensus is. I talked to Julian and he agreed, and we are aligned with JJ. Chrissa would vote our way to make sure it isn't her. Another thing that's happening is the idol search. The video made literally no freaking sense, but when the channel liked this video about spectograms, Julian put the video into it and it spelled sink. It turned out that by putting the word sink into the blog link, it says a clue will be there but at the merge. I guess this means for now there will be no idols, so as long as the people im with are truthful, the person who is planned to go home at tribal will go home without a shadow of a doubt.

https://youtu.be/ury1fLaZQec

Right now everyone on the tribe is at peace and getting along, but we all know that’s gonna change when we go to tribal council.

I'm sad we lost the first challenge. I came back to do better than i did the first time, so the idea of being the first boot would suck. I'm not that close with Chrissa so 100% she's my vote. She has played more seasons than all of us & the second chancers deserve their time. Also, Chrissa did the worst out of us in the challenge so it makes it easier to convince everyone to vote for her, but i also dont want to be the one who targets her first because that could come back round to me, and i would hate that as i've waited over a year for a 2nd shot at this. At the moment i'm closest with JJ & Will F, they are 100% my final 3 right now. I like Megan & Eric as well. I've only had 1 comversation with Julian and we did get on well but we havent talked about anything since then. I've tried to talk to Chrissa but she's never really tried to talk to me.

Hi!! Megan for my first confessional!! Yall are gonna have to remind me throughout my time in this game to do these because I'm SO bad at remembering to do confessionals lmaooo. So this first round there's been a lot going on. There are three tribes- newbies, flops, and a tribe of vets who have played well. Clearly I am on the flop tribe, because I was a SAD pre-merge boot in Svalbard. I was feeling really excited about my tribe and definitely thought we could do well and at least not lose the first challenge - we don't want to be flops again!! But alas, after a long day of doing that stupid entanglement flash game, we have proven our labels and FLOPPED yet again, getting last. SO. now we have to go to tribal council tonight. I am out of town this weekend so I haven't been able to talk to many people but I hope I can make it through this first vote. All I've heard so far is that people want to keep the tribe strong so we don't lose another challenge, and based on the first challenge scores, the two bottom challenge players would be Chrissa and Jack. So far I have heard that people want to do Jack instead of Chrissa, which I am fine with. I haven't talked to him that much and I think the time zone difference unfortunately puts him at a disadvantage, so honestly, we should probably vote him out first. I am nervous of course though because people have been fairly quiet and that's never a good thing, but I am hoping and praying that nothing crazy happens and Jack is the first boot and all is good and fine with that. Okay now I'll talk a little about the players on the tribe and how I feel about them- Okay so obviously I know JJ and Julian fairly well from previous games & also being in various group chats together. So far we are planning on working together as a trio and I am GOOD with that so far. Chrissa I have played with once before but she's not very social or talkative, and tbh, I haven't had a DM with her in this game yet, but she seems sweet. Eric I like a lot, he is funny and outgoing and a little chaotic and I love that in him. I think I know him from something previously but quite honestly I don't remember him, but he remembers me LOL. I hope they're good memories. Jack, again, I haven't talked to him much because of the time difference I think. Also isn't he like a minor? Oof that's weird. Anyway onto the final member of my tribe - the king, the legend, the literal love of my life - WILL!!!! I had never met Will before this game but we vibed IMMEDIATELY. We get along so well and we have a lot of things in common and we like the same kinda things. We've had a lot of really good conversations already and I feel the closest to him in this game by far, even though I have known other people on my tribe longer. I adore Will and I will do everything in my power to make sure we both get as far in this game as we can. Okay I think that's enough for a first confessional, bye!!!

Things have been pleasant and slow so far. Everyone on the tribe seems nice and at this point I’m still just hoping that we’ll all get as far in the game as possible at the expense of the more experienced players. I’m a little concerned because I haven’t really been party to any strategy talk yet; I think that’s just because no one has thought it necessary while we don’t have to go to tribal, but I’m still worried I might just be on the outs and not know it.

hiiii so glad to be back in the game!!!! So thankful I have the opportunity to redeem myself after my huge flop in 94, but lowkey worried about being on the An tribe? Only because it is filled with people who have done well in the past I’m not sure how to measure where I fall within them, but everyone has been very nice and seems to get along with me so far! Also it seems like there is no suspicion from them about Zach and I being siblings which is STELLAR. From looking at the cast I think the only person who knows for sure is JJ, and perhaps Megan? But thankfully they aren’t on a tribe with either of us so that might work in our favor. I’m a little nervous about this first challenge but I have one of the highest scores on my tribe atm, so I feel like if we go to tribal it might be okay. Fingers crossed hehe ;))

I’m SCARED I’ve been out of the loop for TOO LONG. 

from what I've heard i am safe i won't be comfortable until i heard the votes not being all me. 

https://youtu.be/oX4-_QPoqNk

https://youtu.be/YviOufmjmps

My brand is having 4 minute confessionals

from episode 1 https://youtu.be/VqDkCGLTARU

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from episode 1 also https://youtu.be/mklfEHtGp04

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9UqNr3fbiE

Jack voted out 6-1

[ngame989]

I'm new to writing fanfic, and always work solo, so when I saw you have a whole team at your disposal, it blew my mind. I've got a list of questions about that: 1. How did you guys find each other and get started? 2. How does your work flow look for a story vs. a page/chapter of the comic? 3. How much do you love having an editor? 4. How does your work change from draft to final? 5. The quality of your prose is very consistent, is that just you as a writer, or is it your team keeping you good?

1. Seddm, EA, and Dino were all good friends of mine from the fandom from before or during Season 3 (I started watching the show between 2B and BFM). Toxic started watching the show sometime in late 2018 and messaged me on Tumblr for some sort of formatting help, or tips and tricks for getting posts more noticed in the fandom or something? I don’t remember and Tumblr DMs are awful to navigate, but we quickly bonded over what really matters most.

Lawchan had been a longtime follower of the show and fanfic author who inspired me to get into it back after 3A and we started talking and became friends at some point in the last year or so. BMC popped into my askbox when I opened it up to headcanon suggestions and ended up sending me over 100 in a span of 3 days that were all wonderful and creative so we started talking more. This really is a “team” in a loose sense, I just have a ton of awesome and creative and supportive friends willing to help out with this.

Oddly enough, this project started less than a day after (and was inspired by) Lake House Fever. I had already been thinking about getting back into fanfiction writing after S4 ended and we were pissed and salty and just needed good Starco thoughts so I hit him up and we started chatting and thought “huh wait a Star and Marco section of a family photo album would be a cool concept for some sort of series” and it evolved from there. We’d planned out a lot of the basics for the comic before the show ended and were waiting on the canon resolution before going any further, and Cleaved shook a lot up for what the postcanon status quo would be, so my whole aforementioned group all sat in a Discord channel on and off for literally 8+ hours the day after Cleaved and roundtable’d the entire backbone of the Earthni timeline for almost every major character (so if there’s people in the credits for TGG that haven’t shown up directly in any works yet, that’s where they contributed).

2.  Overall I’m the project lead and head writer so the majority of specific ideas, what should this page have or where is the story going, etc, come from me although anything we do gets signed off on by at LEAST me, Toxic, and Seddm first.  For comics, I usually plan the concept (Star goes here, these people are talking to each other, happy or sad, etc) and then let Toxic do his thing - he’s great already but is SUUUUUUUUPER amazingly wonderful at reading my mind and making visuals that represent my thoughts even better than the visuals in my head for them. He’ll do a rough page layout and sketch, we workshop that, then he does line-art, we look for any issues or revisions there, then he colors as I make the dialogue.  Usually takes a few days of back and forth.

Honestly my workflow for writing fics is absolute ass and you should not learn from us (ESPECIALLY me) if you’re getting into the game, hahahaha. Every day that I say I’m gonna write something, I usually end up dicking around at my computer until 1 AM and THEN decide to write a little bit and lose sleep over it. A lot of Glow was written between 2 and 6 AM on a Saturday night. I’m ridiculously nitpicky of my own work and half the time before I even finish typing a sentence I’m already erasing it because I decided it was dumb or did something wrong, which makes drafts take F O R E V E R, but the silver lining is that my first draft is already very polished by the time it’s done.

Overall, we play to our strengths - Seddm and I are general idea guys, “wouldn’t it be funny/cool if X” or “we should tell a story about Y” etc, and Toxic is especially wonderful at coming up with fantastic visual designs or gags or whatever else. So there’s plenty of times where I’ll give him the rough outline for a comic page and he’ll slip in some goofy background thing that makes it so much better, or I’ll give him a joke idea and it’ll work amazingly. I also like to call Seddm my “internal debate moderator”. When I’m struggling to figure out what to do for something, I’m often torn between a few ideas. Getting outside advice on it can obviously be really helpful, but there are times that it leaves me even more confused about what to do. But because my and Seddm’s understandings of the characters and senses of design and humor are so damn similar, he can basically serve as both a neutral voice and still part of my own thought process at the same time, which really helps me get my own personal ideas in order before running them by others.

3. Editors are great and wonderful and perfect and I love my friends to death for graciously helping week in and week out with this when I ping them with “hey guys shat this out, sun has been up for an hour so im gonna go fucking die now bye”. As stated earlier, perhaps my need for one isn’t AS high because I self-edit so compulsively as I go, but it’s soooooooo easy to get caught up in your own head and intentions and not spot obvious issues with your own writing that outside voices help a ton.

4. Whoops I guess I answered already. Very little.

5. Given that edits don’t change much about the structure of my writing, I guess it’s me - thanks! But my team is great about keeping me in line with my own vision in editing and hitting any lines that just seem out of place. There was one particular cut line in Glow that I won’t post here that was easily a full standard deviation of naughty greater than the rest of the fic’s tone (unintentional, it was very late -_-) and that got caught and shot down real quick lmfao.

[borderline-off-fangame]

Birb answers random questions you probably thought about asking!

Might as well do this. *shrug emoji* 

Q: When did you start working on Borderline?

A: September 18th, 2015 is when I sort of started working on Borderline? beforehand I actually wrote a fanfic.. it was terrible.. then again, the first few updates even more terrible. It’s been 3 years since I started working on it, and I’ve made quite a lot of progress over the course of a year. 

Q: What do you use to make assets? 

A: Sai to draw, and gimp and paint.net to save them in 8-bit format (if it has textures, use gimp. paint.net just.. fucks it up even if you lower transparency on that bitch). For voices and edits, I use audacity, and my laptop mic to record my voice.. not sure what wolf uses to make their music, you might have to ask them, as for chii, she doesn’t use sai, i know she uses medibang now??? again, ask them!!

Q: What got you to write the story in the first place? 

A: uuuuu.. too much fangames inspired me to make my own thing. It wasn’t as much solid as it was, but the premise was still the same: Max has to deliver food to the Guardians. Of course, I had to make several changes to the story, because the first variation, you already knew what you had to do. In the current version, Max has no idea why Puppeteer is there, and what their intention is, other than to help you with your job. There might be more changes to the story in the future, probably minor changes and shit like that, but the main premise still stays the same!

Q: You accept cameos in your game?

A: YES, ABSOLUTELY, GIVE ME YOUR CHILDREN RIGHT NOW AND I WILL EMBED THEIR CHARACTER FILES INTO MY GAME FOREVER!! ... yes, yes I do actually! From time to time, I do accept cameo appearances in my game, but these cameo appearances don’t like.. uuuh.. how to put this. usually cameo appearances are done where like the character simply exists and doesn’t contribute anything other than just.. existing. In Borderline however, each cameo has it’s own purpose in the game, as I want the cameos to DO SOMETHING other than just stand idly and exist, so of course, each cameo is given a purpose. So when you give me your character, I make sure to do them a lot of justice!

Q: Can we use your assets? 

A: I’d rather you ask first, but chances are that I would say no, and instead would offer to make assets for you. Even with school, I have lots of time on my hands and always need some kind of excuse to get out of my comfort zone and do stuff. I also make free assets from time to time, so you’re allowed to use those as long as you provide credit. In short, if you want some assets, don’t hesitate to ask me to make you some assets. Again, it gives me an excuse to do stuff.

Q: Are you in need of aid or suggestions maybe?

A: ... always! I’m just either too anxious to ask for help, or I’m unsure of how to organize myself and tell people what I am in need.. The most important thing I am ALWAYS in need of are beta-testers, and of course, the more the merrier! Not everyone might point out the same bugs as everyone else when they play my game, and most of the time I beta-test the game.. every. single. time I set up an event to MAKE SURE it works the way I want it!! ...But sometimes I happen to miss a couple.. or maybe a little bit more. (and I burned myself out doing that oops.) But even if you decide to offer your help, I’d be utmost grateful! 

Q: Is your game crossover friendly?

A: The fuck you saying, Borderline is the biggest crossover you’ll ever get to play! ...Yes my game is crossover friendly dun worry! ;w; Not sure why I’d answer that question but if you’re curious, refer to two questions above (the cameo one).

Q: Where do we report bugs?

A: You can use the submit box to report any bugs you find. If possible, provide a screenshot and submit it there. You can also personally IM me if you feel comfortable ;w; Just please.. be specific when you’re reporting a bug. I really can’t fathom at all, as I’m but a slow dunce and might not understand what you’re saying at first... I’msosorry!!!

Q: What program are you using to make the game?

A: Rpgmaker 2003. It’s only 20 bucks both on steam and on the official site (doe I did buy it from the official site cuz steam is hecc.. and my laptop can only handle so much. :’3) 

Q: I am stuck somewhere, and I need help!

A: There is a solution folder which can be found within the game, not only does it contain images, but it also contains videos as well.. Remind me to uh.. fix a couple of dem.. puzzles.. yes.. 

Q: Is it okay to make fanart/ask/rp blogs of your characters? 

A: Why yes, it’s actually okay! I really appreciate the gesture! For art, because the tagging system (on tumblr) can’t get any more wonkier than it is, so if I don’t see something that you drew for me, please don’t feel bad! It’s just tumblr is fucking garbo. :’3333 Instead, you can use the submit box or IM me. If it’s of lewd nature, I ask of you to NOT DRAW THE FOLLOWING CHARACTERS IN LEWD IMAGERY (and I am copying this from the main blog): Basically the protagons of the game (Max is ace who shames people for fun, doesn’t care about sex at all, Sam is a fucking child, Seneca is not even my own character, Puff is also ace and very sex repulsed, and Aleyes is.. he’s not a tentacle monster that’s for sure.), Asriel (He might be his own character, but.. please don’t fuck the goat!! He’s supposed to be innocent!!!!), Baka (not even mine), Pipscrap (not even mine)., Now.. Regarding ask/rp blogs however, I am okay with it, but do consult with me about it (hey, those are my children, I wanna interact with my own children!!) Plus, I can provide you with a bit of an in-depth detail regarding the characters so you know what’s up.. Which brings another question to light.

Q: Can we ship <insert character here> with <insert character here>???

A: I’m a thotticus for shippings, but I’m a huge ass sucker for chemistry(tm) and relationship development between two or more people! I really wanna see what y’all can come up with really so go crazy!! But, keep in mind..

There are... restrictions however.. mostly with Max and Puff who are in a canonical relationship; this should also apply for AU’s as well, please pleaaaaaase don’t ship them with any other characters other than each other! Not only because I can’t see those two being shipped outside their pairing, but also because their relationship is very critical to the lore itself! So.. please be respectful of my decision! ;; There are other restrictions, but I won’t list them here, because we’d be here for an eternity. ;; Just don’t do illegal shit that can get you called out or worse.. please do ask for restrictions.. ;; 

Q: Is it okay to add Easter Eggs/references regarding your game or your characters in our work? 

A: I’d cry? I’d appreciate you ask me about it first so we can consult and shit, but I’d be hella fine with that!!

Q: You inspired me to start my own game!

A: I know it’s not a question, but I can’t just shrug this one off, please excuse me while I go and scream into the void! *sniffs* I am glad that my work actually inspired you to make your own game, and I cry?? Like I literally feel the feels?? <333333

[cynicalseven]

thank you @jessefandomunited for tagging me!!!! (& giving me the opportunity to overshare haha oops)

Name: Dave!

Birthday: August 27th (im 17!)

Zodiac: virgo but man ive absolutely never related to virgo astrology in my life

Height: im like 5′3 but im the same height as a friend who says hes 5′4 so wheres the lie 👀

Sexual orientation: gay mostly id say??

Favourite colour: green!!!! all the green shades & i like muted tones a lot too

Favourite book: Toby Alone, hands down, although i did read it in french so I can’t guarantee the english translation is as good but i highly recommend it

Favourite (book) series: Toby Alone is technically a two book series but im gonna go with Harry Potter

Favorite artist: *stare into the camera like im in the office* im assuming this means visual artist and atm i dont have a personal influence cause art school messes your MIND

Favourite band: my playlist is currently such a huge fucking mess of different artists so im gonna dodge this question and say ive been especially listening to video game soundtracks lately (journey & professor layton specifically)

Last movie I watched: The Eagle Huntress for my international cinema class? (it’s a really good documentary about a mongolian tradition i really suggest it if you like mountains and nordic landscapes it’s very beautiful!!!)

Hogwarts house: Slytherin!! 🐍 (one of the soft ones)

Random fact about me: i love learning and i enjoy school and really try my hardest but im spectacularly bad at it tbh but i got a job at a nearby circus school and i’m coaching kids as well as part of a show so!!! some hope there.

Random fact in general: lithography and chromatography were the preferred techniques to make posters during the golden age of magic!!

When did you create your blog: according to tumblr this blog has existed since  the beginning of February but i’ve been on tumblr since late 2013 (i am. shocked)

Do you have any other blogs: haha oh boy here we go 

@lizrdscales is my main blog (currently fixing the desktop theme) thats where I follow from

i have the url @grxvityboy cause thats my old username if you click on it theres a pretty redirect page

@rosefoxandprince is my aesthetic blog but i desperately need to fix the theme

i have a few other url saved that i plan on using a little later 👀

What made you decide to get a tumblr: uhhh it was a LONG time ago i believe it was because i saw a bunch of screenshots from it on facebook and the format intrigued be so i joined? i made this specific blog cause i wanted a platform to interact with the (very.... small) nysm fandom and not have to bother them with my other millions of interests

Why did you choose your URL:  its a funny story actually i was in psychology class and the teacher was pissing me off by how not lightly she was talking about severe issues and i was being very cynical, which my friend pointed out and joked i should make that my new url so i just added “seven” because of danny’s card trick in the first movie!!

i think literally everyone i know from this fandom has been tagged already so ima just tag @wilderofhearts in case she wakes up from her hibernation 👀 but thank you for tagging me!!!

[arituzz]

nineteen firsts and one last

-SNOWBAZ-

Summary: It’s Simon’s nineteenth birthday. He’s not expecting anything unusual, just some messages from his tumblr friends. But Baz has different plans.

Word count: 3.7k

Rating: T

Tags: tumblr au, friends to lovers, distant relationship, first meeting

Ari: This is just an edit from last year’s fic, because I didn’t like the format. Happy 20th birthday, Simon ♡

SIMON

I wake up to the doorbell ringing. I look at the clock. 5:59 am. Fuck. Who could it be at this unholy hour? Probably my father, coming back home drunk after a night of partying. Damn, why didn’t he stay in the hotel, as usual?

The doorbell rings again. “I’m fucking coming, dad!” I yell.

I put on some clothes and go to the door. I open it, ready to scowl at my father but, instead, there’s a delivery girl looking at me through her pointy glasses.

“Good morning,” she says. “A packet for Simon Snow.”

“Uhm… that’s me,” I tell her, a little bewildered.

She gives me the packet and makes me sign a paper. I tell her thanks and make to go back inside. “Wait,” I shout before she leaves. “Next time, could you come, I don’t know, in the afternoon? When I’m not sleeping?”

“Sorry, the sender wrote specific instructions to deliver this on 21st June at precisely 5:59 am. He even paid an extra and called the company to make sure we followed the instructions. Sounded rather bitter. I wouldn’t risk my job,” she explains. Ha. Like dying her hair blue wouldn’t risk it. Though, I have to say it looks awesome on her dark skin.

“Oh, in that case… Thanks. Have a nice day,” I wish her.

“See you later!”

I close the door and go to the living room, to open the packet. It’s a basket full of fresh-baked cherry scones and some blocks of butter. There’s a card with a note. It reads:

Some like it hot (page 38)

5:59 am - First breakfast to your door

I’d bring it to your bed if I were there

Baz

(Gampire Chaz to my Craigon Rain)

Oh my God. Baz. Right, it’s my birthday. It’s nice of him that he remembered. Baz is my best friend on tumblr. Well, he is my best friend, period. Although I’ve never met him in person, I feel like we’ve known each other for years. And to think that we used to be at each other’s throats!

When I first read the book A Charmed Life, I became hugely obsessed with its characters—i.e. the protagonist, a half-dragon named Craigon Rain—so I created a tumblr blog to obsess about them. At that time, there were very few people in the fandom: gampire-chaz-loves-craigon-rain (Baz), rainchaz61 (Penny), tape-exists-and-im-glad-for-it (Agatha), trixiethelesbianpixie (Trixie), gampirhys (Rhys), so-noted-rainchaz (Niall), and craigonsnowrain (me). And we were like a little family.

But I hated Baz. And he hated me. We would make stupid competitions to see who had the most notes on their posts. I finally gave up because the fucker draws the most brilliant fanart. So I decided to befriend him and make some projects together.

A smile draws in my face as I eat the delicious over-buttered cherry scones. Just the way I like them.

I grab my cellphone to send a thank you message to Baz.

When I’m done with breakfast, I scroll down my dash on tumblr. No happy birthday message. Well, it’s still early. Not for Baz, though, he lives in England, so it must be the afternoon already.

I decide to watch TV for a while—I have nothing planned for today. The fact is that I don’t really have any friends in real life. I don’t know many people here in Nebraska, and the ones I know are complete idiots. So my plan is to stay in all day and read a freaking lot of Rainchaz fanfiction.

After a while, I turn off the TV and go to tumblr on my laptop. Oh, one notification: gampire-chaz-loves-craigon-rain mentioned you in a post.

I open the link and it’s a beautiful doodle of me and Baz, fighting a chimera—as in one of the book’s scenes. I’ve posted some pics of me before, so he has references. The post says:

“Do it. Fucking unleash. Now.” (page 5)

First doodle of you (and me)

Baz

I hit reblog and add:

“I can’t. It doesn’t work like that.”

BTW it’s fucking WONDERFUL!! tysm <3

I’m reading a smutty Rainchaz fic when the doorbell rings again. It’s not that I’m gay, I just love the characters so much. And the smut is great, I love it. The authors in this fandom are just brilliant.

I look at the clock. 7:59 am. It’s still too early for dad to come and I’m not expecting anyone. (Ever.)

I open the door and the same delivery girl brings another packet, this time smaller.

She smiles at me and says, “You know the procedure.” I sign the paper and she leaves with a “See you later!”

“Later,” I reply.

I go back into the apartment and open the packet. It’s a book. The book. A Charmed Life. I go to the first page and, holy shit, it’s signed by the author! It’s so difficult to get a signed copy, I’ve been trying for months, but the author is not very sociable. She wrote:

To Simon Snow,

May you fight your own battles and forge your own wings.

Cather Avery

Wow. It’s perfect.

There is also a card with a note that reads:

“It’s the good things that’ll drive you mad with missing them.” (page 11)

First signed copy of your favourite book.

(I miss you even though I’ve never met you)

Baz

Jesus Christ. This is the best birthday present of my life. I take a picture of it to post it on tumblr and add: @gampire-chaz-loves-craigon-rain I wish you were here so I could hug you into oblivion! Thank you, best b-day present ever <3

I grab my old copy of A Charmed Life—don’t want to ruin this one—and start running through its pages. With all these gifts I feel like re-reading it. Again. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve read it.

It’s a Young Adult fantasy novel about a very special chosen one. A chosen who doesn’t want to be chosen. Craigon Rain is the last half-human, half-dragon alive. He’s never met his mother—that’s where he got the dragon part. His father wants him to take part in a battle that’s not his own. A battle against the vampires. At first Craigon—the half-dragon—obeys his father’s orders until he meets Gampire Chaz, a teenage vampire who finds himself in the same situation as Craigon, but on opposite ends. The two boys fall in love, defying everything that’s been established by their families and it’s precisely their love the thing that saves them all.

I identify myself quite a lot with Craigon Rain—my name is Simon Snow, see the irony. I never met my mother either and I also think my father is the responsible of everything bad that happens in my life.

Baz identifies himself with the antagonist, Gampire Chaz—only because he’s got brown skin like him, and their middle names rhyme. The moron.

My phones buzzes and I leave the book on the table. Another tumblr notification: gampire-chaz-loves-craigon-rain mentioned you in a post.

I open the link. It’s an aesthetic with six pictures of us—separately, duh—and three pictures with vampires and dragons. It’s beautiful. Under the post, Baz has written:

“Strong. Graceful. Fucking ruthless.” (Page 14)

(You are)

8:59 am - First aesthetic of us!

Baz

I hit reblog and add: This is too much Baz. I can’t even!! tysm <3

I can’t believe any of my tumblr friends—we call ourselves raindrops—has wished me a happy birthday yet. Except Baz, sort of. I mean, he hasn’t said it explicitly. Penny lives in India and Agatha in France, I think they should have posted something by now… Now that I think of it I have no clue where Rhys, Niall and Trixie live… Well, Niall is clearly asian but that doesn’t mean that he lives in Asia. I don’t know.

I’m hungry. Thinking too much makes me hungry. Thinking makes me hungry. I go the kitchen to see if there’s anything to eat.

Nothing. Fuck. I’m gonna have to go buy something.

I go to the closest supermarket and buy some popcorn and a peanut butter cup ice cream. Perfect combination for fanfiction reading.

As I climb the steps to my apartment, I bump into the delivery girl from before.

“Hey, watch out,” she scowls and extends me yet another package.

I sign the paper and tell her, “later?”

“Later,” she answers, with a smile.

Once I’m inside, I open the packet—the third one today, and it’s only 9:59 am.

There are some papers inside the packet, a photo of a star, I think?

I read the note that Baz has left:

“Twinkle, twinkle little star!” (page 260)

9:59 am - First star

(These are official documents that prove that this star is named after you and is now yours.)

(Sorry I couldn’t give you the Universe, but this is a star-t.)

(Yes, I knew you wouldn’t understand shit of what the papers say.)

Baz

I’m at a loss of words. What the fuck. It must have cost him a fortune. Well, it must have cost his father a fortune. I guess they can afford it.

I send him a message on tumblr: got the star. what the actual fuck? speechless.

And then I add: why arent u replying to any of my posts? u ok?

Right after reading the first fic, halfway through my ice-cream, the doorbell rings again. 10:59 am. I’m guessing it’s not dad, just yet.

I open the door, and a familiar blond haired girl with the most beautiful brown eyes I’ve ever seen is standing there, looking bored.

“Agatha!” I scream.

“Happy birthday, Simon,” she smiles at me and kisses my cheek. “I’ve come to bring you your next gift.” She shows me what seems like a tattooer box.

I know what Agatha looks like and that she’s a professional tattooer. She’s posted several pics on raindrops faces day. And the rest, too. All except Penny. (She says she can’t be bothered to take a selfie.)

“Agatha!” I shout again. I still can’t believe it. “Come in,” I add.

We sit on the sofa and she gives me the next note. It reads:

“Flames and Blazes—The Art of Burning.” (page 203)

10:59 am - First tattoo

(This is a combined gift from Wellbelove and me)

(I made the design and she’s going to tattoo you)

(You actually asked for it, so it’s no surprise)

Agatha shows me the design. It’s a constellation. And there’s fire surrounding it.

“Simon,” she says. “This is going to hurt.”

“It’s wonderful, Agatha,” I say when it’s finished, looking at my back through the mirror. “You could’ve been gentler, though.”

“I was gentle, Simon, believe me,” she replies.

The doorbell rings again. I think that it has rung more in one day than in nineteen years.

“Lunch,” Agatha says, and goes for the door. She opens it. “Hi, Penny,” she says to the delivery girl.

What?

“Penny?” I ask, stupidly.

“Sorry, Simon, it was too fun seeing you all clueless,” she apologizes.

“I am still clueless,” I retort.

She takes me into her arms and gives me a tight hug. “Happy birthday Simon! Let’s have lunch. Where’s the dining room?”

“Uhm, here, in the living room. I eat in the living room.”

“Oh, your note,” Penelope says as she gives me the card.

“Because roast beef and Yorkshire pudding are fucking real as Rain.” (page 84)

11:59 - First roast beef and Yorkshire pudding from Watford

(Because you haven’t eaten real roast beef if it’s not from England)

(And Watford Restaurant serves the best one)

(Enjoy your meal)

Baz

We sit on the sofa and start eating our lunch. I’m so happy. It’s like we do this everyday. But I miss Baz. I miss him so much. Where the fuck is he?

We finish eating and Penny looks at her watch. “It’s 12:59,” she says. “Dessert is here,” she smiles wickedly.

“Open the door, Simon,” Agatha says.

I go for the door and open it.

Baz.

Baz is here. With a cake in his hands.

Baz is here. And I can’t hug him.

“Baz!” I say, grinning widely.

“Hey, Snow, happy birthday,” he says, and hands the cake to me. There’s a card on it, too.

“But he just stood there for as long as he could stand it. I don’t know how he resisted the pull; I felt like my intestines were going to burst out and wrap around him.” (page 167)

12:59 - First meeting

(I’m here.)

Baz

Baz looks like he’s trying to hide the huge smile that’s drawing in his face. But I can see it.

“Fuck, Snow,” he says, finally giving into the smile. “I wanted this to happen at 1:59 pm, but here you go.”

“What?” I ask

He takes out another card from the back pocket of his jeans and reads it.

“Trying not to crack a smile. Page 517.”

Then, he looks at his watch and adds, “ 1:01 pm, first smile. First real life smile from me to you.”

“The presents are getting better,” I say, trying not to smile from ear to ear.

We eat the cake on the sofa. Baz tried to oppose to it, but I don’t really have a table with nice chairs to sit down and chat while drinking tea. I’ve never had anyone come over.

We talk about our lives. Well, they talk about their lives and I listen. And look at Baz. His eyes are prettier than I had imagined. And oh my God, his skin. It reminds me of toffee. It has such an appetizing color it makes me want to taste it.

After a while, Baz leads us downstairs and into a cab that’s parked in front of my building.

The taxi drives for around twenty minutes before it comes to a stop. “We’ve arrived,” the driver anounces.

Baz tips him and gestures us to follow him. We enter a place called The Wavering Wood Cafe.

“Happy birthday!” Rhys, Niall, Trixie and other fellow raindrops I identify from tumblr say at the same time as I go through the door.

“Jesus,” I say. I’m stupefied. A surprise party. For me.

Baz hands me another card and our fingertips brush. He cracks an undecipherable smile and looks away.

I read the note.

“It feels like a party.” (page 40)

2:59 pm - First birthday party

(First of many to come)

Baz

I’m having a great time. It’s so fun talking to all my tumblr friends in real life. I finally got to meet Keris, Trixie’s girlfriend. She always posts pics of them together. (Penny finds it gross.) (But that’s personal. She doesn’t like Trixie.)

I keep giving glances towards Baz’s direction. I don’t know why I can’t stop staring at him.

Suddenly, my phone buzzes. It’s a tumblr post from Baz.

I open the link. It’s a fic. It’s called Snowbaz. Not Rainchaz. I read the summary:

“Because I’m disturbed.” (page 205)

“Ask anyone,”I think out loud, smiling. And then continue reading the summary:

3:59 pm - First fanfiction about us

Baz

I start reading the fic. It’s all fluff and love until the last part. Smut. I read it all. And love every word. Fuck.

I look at Baz. He’s already staring at me. I step towards him.

“Hey, Snow,” he says. “Ever tried a flaming shot?”

“I’m underaged, you know.”

“Not in my country,” he smirks.

“Okay, fine, give me a shot.”

“A flaming shot, Snow,” Baz says. “Here.”

He hands me a small glass of liquor and sets it on fire with a lighter. He does the same with his glass.

“To us,” he says.

“To us,” I reply.

He blows out the fire and drinks all the liquor. I mimic him. Ugh. I grimace.

“Sharing a room with the person you want most is like sharing a room with an open fire,” Baz starts saying, looking directly into my eyes. “He’s constantly drawing you in. And you’re constantly stepping too close. And you know it’s not good—that there is no good—that there’s absolutely nothing that can ever come of it. But you do it anyway. And then…”

“Then you burn,” I finish. God, his eyes are fire.

“Page 177. 4:59 pm, first flaming drink.”

“First drink,” I correct.

He laughs and orders a couple more.

We have a couple more shots and talk about our favorite AUs. We talk more than we drink.

Suddenly Baz looks at his watch, and then back at me. With the same blazing eyes from before. He stays silent, just looking at me, for a moment. He looks hesitant.

I think he’s going to kiss me.

But he doesn’t. He keeps staring. Some minutes pass. I stare at my watch. 6:10 pm. Where’s my 5:59 pm gift?

“Simon…” Baz starts, flaming shot in his hand.

And then I kiss him.

We kiss for a long time. Then I let go and make him reach for me. And we kiss again.

After a while, we break the kiss and smile at each other. I’m grinning. I can’t help it.

“I was going to say You were the sun, and I was crashing into you,” Baz says. “But I guess the best quote for this is And then HE kisses ME.” He can’t hide his grin, either.

“Page 342,” I say. “6:10 pm, first kiss.”

“Shite, what time is it?” He asks, already looking at his watch.

“6:50 pm,” I answer, moronically.

“Let’s go have dinner, Simon. You and me, only.”

“Okay,” I say. And I follow him to the next room.

There’s a small table for two with two candles. It’s always fire with Baz.

We sit down and he takes out another card.

“You smell like something I’d gladly eat, page 421,” he says, staring at my eyes. “6:59 pm, first romantic dinner.”

I blush.

After dinner, we all go to a pub. It’s called The World of Mages.

It’s great and I’m so happy to be surrounded by friends and the person I like. Baz. That’s new. Liking boys. No, not boys. Only Baz. Wanting to kiss him over and over again.

He takes my hand and says, “Want to dance?”

I nod and smile at him. I’m crap at dancing but I don’t care.

Baz puts his hands on my waist and leads me through the song. Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody.

“I should have known that this is what it would be like to dance with Craigon Rain. Fighting in place. Mutual surrender,” Baz whispers into my ear. “Page 508. 7:59 pm, first dance.”

I place both my arms around his neck and slump into him.

We’re still at the pub. Dancing. Well, at least I’m trying.

“What are we going to do?” I ask him. “You’re going to leave back to England.”

���I know,” he answers with a crack in his voice. “We’ll figure it out, little puff.”

“Baz,” I say. “What’s the next gift? I think I have a better idea.”

“Huh? I was going to take you for a drive…”

“I want to be your boyfriend. Your terrible boyfriend,” I say. “Page 390.”

Baz looks surprised. He places both his hands on my face and kisses me, tenderly. “Of course,” he says. And kisses me again.

“8:59 pm,” I say. “First boyfriend.”

And I kiss him again.

After the pub, we say goodbye to our fellow raindrops. There’s a lot of hugging and kisses on the cheek. God, I’m gonna miss them.

“We have to do this more often,” I say. Even though I’m broke. But I’ll find the money somehow.

They all agree.

Once they’re gone, it’s just me and Baz.

“Let’s go back to my apartment,” I tell him.

“What if your father is there?”

“At this time? Not likely. He must be out, drinking again.”

“Okay,” he says.

We go to my apartment and settle in my room. It’s full of constellations on the walls. Because I love astrology. Hence the tattoo.

“Baz, you haven’t seen it,” I say.

“Seen what?”

“The tattoo, idiot!”

I take my shirt off and show it to him. He places his fingertips on my back and starts tracing it. The touch sends shivers down my spine.

“So beautiful…” Baz says.

I turn around and look at him. I reach for his shirt and take it off. Eyes locked on his. I close the distance and kiss him. And then my hands go down. I can’t stop myself. I kiss every spot of his dark olive skin. And I want more. And I can see that he wants, too.

So I take more. I take it all. And I give it all. To him. To Baz.

“Because we match,” I say after a while. My head is resting on Baz’s chest. Our fingers laced. “Page 420.” I look at my watch. “10:58 pm, first time.”

“When did you start giving yourself birthday presents?” Baz asks.

“I think it was when I did this,” I answer. And I kiss him.

“God, I love you, Simon Snow.”

“I love you, Baz.”

“Fell in love, didn’t you?” He smiles.

“10:59 pm, first I love you,” I say.

I go with Baz to the airport. I’m sad that he has to go. But I’m happy that he came. And he’s going to move to the States with his aunt, Fiona, next year. So I just have to wait for a year. And I’m going to visit him soon. Maybe for his birthday.

He looks at me with watery eyes. He holds my hand so hard it hurts a little.

“I’ll come to England, in a couple of months,” I reassure him. “And then you’ll come back. We’ll be seeing each other a lot. You won’t get rid of me that easily.”

“When I come to live in America with Fiona, I’m going to haunt your door day and night.”

There’s a shout for all the passengers of the flight to Southampton Airport.

Baz kisses me, before letting go.

“Goodbye, Simon,” he says. “This is a first and a last goodbye. Because the next time I see you, I won’t let you go for anything in the world.”

“Go on, then,” I say. “Carry on, Baz.”

-FIN-

[leoxirae-archive]

Selective Semi-Hiatus

So, some thing’s have been going on (Relationship stuff, my trial ending, school be back soon, pERSONA 5!!!!1!!!) and I have been getting more and more well sad about this blog. So here how it goes. I will write the hiatus terms in bold and put a read more for a little thought dump under it. So for all who are here for the notice, just don’t click the read more, guys...

I will be on Selective Semi Hiatus for a period of time. Maybe a week maybe a day, right now there is no set date when I will return. This means that I will ocassionally come in and look if people replied or if there is anything in my asbox and otherwise just stay away from tumblr. IM me if you want my discord or any other kind of contact from me.

And now for the thought dump

I have now made some posts about how sad I am on this blog. Some I have deleted, some are just burried under posts and posts. It’s just that even though people rp with me and I seem to have 500 threads going I feel lonely and kind of... Not a part of the team. Like I have maybe 3 individuals that are always up for interacting with me, but I am slowly losing my drive to be on here because it feels like I am screaming at a big big wall. I know I have quite some followers, and I know I have started several threads, but the thing is that I feel like this doesn’t matter, because nobody cares, which makes active rping hard for me. Dashboard shinenigans usually pass by, when I reblog inbox memes they go unnoticed or ignored. Hell I had anon hate until I just said fuck it and deactivated Anon for good. At least then someone payed me attention even if it was hate, but someone acknolwedged my existance?

Maybe it’s because my Red seems so incredibly off. Maybe a lot of people just dislike my Red. Maybe they really don’t care and just follow for follow back. I don’t really know and at this point I couldn’t give any more fucks about it.

I am no quality blog. My red isn’t the quality people seek for. I am not a great writer, nor am I posting aestetic stuff or have a nice theme. I hardly format and use a bunch of premade icons just so I can have some for Red. I get it. I am not exactly a person people tend to care about. I am not funny nor lovely or in any case special, but  try. I do as much as I can and just try my best to survive in this tumblr world where cliques and drama reign the dashboard.

I am greatful for all the people that stick with me and don’t mind me, but I know it’s just a warm buisness relation. But I am still happy about it.

I usually feel already incredibly insecure and like I have no place in life, so anyone who gives me the slightest attention and validation to my existance really makes me happy. But at this point I just really don’t know anymore.

Being on this blog, daily, minute for minute, hour after hour, nothing really happens. Maybe timezones, maybe I am just being ignored, oh who knows, everyone has their life. And I can’t throw mine away to be here sitting in front of a screen waiting like an idiot for the slightest notification. I need to live myself.

So I want to step away from this blog and tumblr in general for a bit. I want to concentrate on myself, my friends and my school slash career. I don’t give up on tumblr but I will definitely minimize my activity on here, just because I know and am used to not having anythign to do here.

So yes, for now, see ya guys when I come around. I really doubt people will miss me much but oh well. As already said feel free to ask for discord or skype or even line. I am always happy to have new and more friends. I love all of you. But I can’t force people to see me, so it’s up to you.

For now: Hasta la later, peeps

[indi-flying-with-dragons]

1, 2, 15, 16, and 18 XD

HEY MAN XD How ya doing? :3 *HUGGLES* Sorry for getting to this late. xD Around this time of night things calm down enough and I finished going through my feed usually so I tend to have more of a breather for things like this. XD

Let me see here. >.>~~~

1: What is the most useless fact you know?

Oh shit let me think? XD You’d have to define “useless” there man because I don’t really categorize things into things like this. e.O O.e I mean I have “disgusting” or “weird” or “shocking” or “little-known” or “freaky” or “could be useful but isn’t yet” along with “useful” and “cool” and “awesome” and “funny” categories. Not “useless.” O.o

….-^- I shall do one from the “random” category and shake them around and see what I pick from a hat! *nod nod* -^-

*fails when most of the things he draws out are actually cool or helpful or important*. … -///- Nrrr. I not do this good eh?

… SCREW THIS. >^^

Did you know that blue feathers are a structural color? :D Come from the structure of the feather itself and not any pigments? (Unless you’re a parrot because they can make rare color pigments naturally like blue, red, yellow, and green!) Purple is another structural color, same with iridescence. :3 You don’t see it so well unless there’s sunlight. :D

Red, yellow, orange, shades of brown, shades of grey and black, are all pigment-based colors. :D Red, yellow, orange are all from one’s diet (unless you’re a parrot!), with green being a combination of the yellow pigment the blue structural color. :3

White is a structural color and complete absence of pigment at all. :D So it wears down more easily than black which has a lot of pigment reinforcing the feather structure from wear and tear. Which is why most bird species that fly a lot usually have a darker color band along the edges of their flight feathers, to stop that wear and tear, if their wings aren’t already a darker color. :3

2: What was your most awkward “hahaha…oh wait you’re serious” moment?

Geeze have to have one come to my mind. Hrm. I KNOW I’ve some. Or rather… I know I’ve done a FUCK-TON of “You’re totally serious …wait you’re actually joking? oops.” which is the exact opposite I’d say. *grins*

…Fuck it’s not actually coming to me. I just keep getting plenty of “you’re serious… oh wait you were joking the whole time? Ahahah… *belated laugh*” instead. O.e

I don’t have the memory for things like this. T^T (And you overthink things a lot!) Shush! (NEVAH -^-) -.-;;; …Fuck this I’m gonna do what comes to my mind instead. -^-;;;My dad was leading into a pun with me totally unknowing. He was telling a pretty serious-sounding story, and I was focusing more on his lips to lip-read him, and not noticing the little glint of mischief in his eyes. Then he ended with a very VERY bad pun about a pig somehow. (Don’t fully remember it, thankfully!) I got confused for several long beats… then deadpanned when I finally got it. I told him it was P.U. two-thirds of a pun and so bad.

He laughed a lot and then proceeded to keep getting my mind to fill in his puns for him, even ending up at the end drawing out something and my mind filled in the joke FOR him without him having to say a word. He cracked up so hard, I was laughing yet complaining about him doing that.

Then I said (My mom was also in the room btw): “MOM! Make my dad stop using my mind against meeeeee!”

Then we all took in how that SOUNDED, especially out of context, and just erupted into total laughter for many long minutes. xD One of the hardest we’ve laughed as a group that I can think of. XD I was proud of that bit. XD Even if I didn’t like the PUNishment my dad subjected me to beforehand. -x-;;

15: How would you describe Tumblr to a friend who has never heard of it?

A site full of social justice stuff, discourse, random memes, cool stuff, and really weird things you never heard before, all stuffed into one thing. The IM function kinda sucks. The tag system is tricky to figure out. But I really love reblogging things to have on my blog as some sort of whacked up collector fetish.

…What? Why are you giving me that look?

Wait. WAIT

COME BAHCK

16: What is the single most liberating thought that you’ve ever had?

Well there’s one that recently comes to mind. To realize that there isn’t much of a separation between me in this lifetime and me in my spirit. That, while I had almost idolized my spirit self because I KNEW what to expect then and was laid back and calm and not the frazzled nervous wreck I feel myself to be in this lifetime… there really isn’t that much difference at all. In this lifetime, I’m acting exactly as how my spirit self would act… because I AM my spirit self.

I just don’t have the information I am used to having back at home, which frazzles me quite a bit. But all the good things I saw in my spirit self, I have in abundance here as well. And all the things I don’t like about this physical life self, I’ve done and encountered plenty of times back at home. I just didn’t really pay attention to those as much. No matter where I am, no matter how much or little I remember, I AM the same exact person here in this life as I am back at home. I’m just responding to a different situation, with some limitations on hand that makes it more tricky for me than I’m usually used to handling.

That really helped me a fuck ton that revelation. :) I was finally ready to believe it and integrate that into my perception of the world around me. :) Finally. X>X~

18: What’s the worst case of “spoiled rotten” that you’ve seen?Let’s see…

I’m not going off in person because I can’t overhear that well IRL due to being hard-of-hearing even WITH my cochlear implants. I’m going off what I saw online since I can more consistently actually know what the fuck people are saying in that format.

There was someone who was taking a photo of them in their car, a teenager, with a literal wad of cash in their purse, simultaneously complaining about not getting something better, as well as bragging about what they already had. Then I heard some agency went in and busted their parents up over the incriminating wad of cash in the purse, since that was pretty good evidence their parents had been doing some illicit activities. And this person saw fit to complain and throw a fit over it, and jump on the government agency as being the “bad guys” and themself and their parents being “poor victims of a crime” no matter how many people tried to explain to them on social media why they, that person themselves, had actually fucked up.

[what-the-water-gaveme]

1-112

hey, anon. thanks for giving me another reason to procrastinate lol*also my apologies bc it won’t let me fix the format on this 1 - Who was the last person you texted?my sister 
2 - When is your birthday?november 11th3 - Who do you want to be with right now?
a person i really like at the moment 4 - What sports do you play?lol none. i have like 0 hand/eye coordination 
5 - Who is the first person in your contacts?alex6 - What is your favorite song as of the moment?i'm really obsessed with the entire how tobe a human being album by glass animals
7 - If you were stranded on an island, who do you wish to be with?someone who would keep both of our asses alive lol
8 - What do you feel right now?kinda lonely 
9 - What chocolate is your favorite?dark chocolate 
10 - How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have?one girlfriend and kinda-ish one boyfriend 
11 - Why did you create a Tumblr account?my friend kristyn told me to lol
12 - Who is your favorite blogger?i dunno actually
13 - Where do you want to be right now?home or with the person i care about a whole 
14 - What do you want to be in the future?fuck if i know lol
15 - When was the last time you cried? Why?uhhh yesterday because college is really stressing me tf out
16 - Are you happy?ehhhhhh lol
17 - Who do you miss?someone i haven’t really talked to that much lately 18 - If you were given a chance, would you like to have a different life?probably
19 - What was the best thing you were given?probably a bracelet that says "i love you" in my grandmas handwriting 
20 - Who was the last person who called you?my sister
21 - What is your favorite dish?im a slut for anything mexican lol
22 - Who is your bestfriend?my sister 
23 - What is your biggest regret?i let someone take advantage of me and i ended up getting really hurt when they dropped me like i meant nothing.
24 - Have you ever cheated on your partner?no
25 - Who do you spend crazy moments with?ive had some pretty wild times with my sister, my friends, and my roommate 
26 - Name someone pretty.my roommate is super pretty and all my friends and just random people i see ugh everyone is so pretty !!!!!!!!
27 - Who was the last person you hugged?my mom
28 - What kind of music do you listen to?mostly alternative
29 - Are you over your past?not really 
30 - Who is the last person in your contacts?zaria. a girl from one of my classes last semester
31 - What kind of person do you want to date?someone kind and someone who understands me. someone who i wouldn't mind being around a lot. 
32 - Do you have troubles sleeping at night?yes, sometimes.
33 - From whom was the last text message you received?my sister 
34 - What do you prefer, jeans or skirt?probably a skirt bc fuck pants 
35 - How’s your heart?it’s somehow managing to keep me alive which is kinda cool i guess lol 
36 - Did you ever have a girlfriend/boyfriend whose name starts with a “J”?nope
37 - Do you like someone as of the moment?i do. very much 38- What would you want to say to your latest ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend?probably “fuck you for treating me the way you did”
39 - Do you have any phobias?i;m afraid of water, frogs, and failure 
40 - Did you try to change for a person?yeah
41 - What’s the nicest thing have you given to someone?i gave one of my exes a teddy bear from my childhood which i guess was a pretty heartfelt gift 
42 - Would you go back to your previous relationship?nope
43 - Are you in a good or bad mood?i;m just in an eh mood
44 - Name someone you can’t live without.my mom 
45 - Describe your dream date.any date would be a good date at this point lol
46 - Describe your dream wedding.i don;t think i necessarily want to get married 
47 - How many roses did you receive last Valentine’s?lmao 
48 - Have you ever been kissed?yeah lol
49 - How long is your longest relationship?uh i think like a year or something like that 
50 - Do you regret your past?sometimes 
51 - Can you do something stupid for someone else?depends on the person and how much alcohol is involved lol
52 - Have you ever cried over someone?yes
53 - Do you have a grudge against anyone?against my dad
54 - Are you a crybaby?i can be sometimes i guess 
55 - Do people praise you for your looks?lmao 
56 - Did you fall for someone you shouldn’t?i probably shouldn’t;t have fallen for the person i have feelings for now. it’s a messy situation 
57 - Have you ever done something bad but you don’t regret?yes
58 - Do you like getting hurt?not really 
59 - Does anyone hate you?probably one of my exes 
60 - Did you slap anyone whose name starts with an “R”?lol yeah 
61 - What hair color do you prefer?i will forever be swooning over redheads
62 - If you can change anything about yourself, what is it?probably the way i look lol
63 - Do you love someone as of the moment?i think i could possibly 
64 - Have you ever thought of killing yourself?yeah; i went through some pretty tough times in high school 
65 - Do you have issues with somebody in your school?no one gives a fuck in college lol
66 - Can you live without internet?it would definitely take some getting used to
67 - What’s the song that remind you of your special someone?scenes from an italian restaurant by billy joel 
68 - Are you good at holding back your tears? nooo
69 - Are you a crybaby?i think this question is already on here lol
70 - Have you ever experienced being hysterical?yeah quite a bit 
71 - Are you a KPOP fan?a little! my friend holly got me into it
72 - Do you study hard?i did last semester but i seemed to have lost all motivation this semester 
73 - Have you ever sacrificed something important to you for someone you love?not that i can think of74 - Did you ever had a kiss under the moonlight?yes
75 - Have you ever ridden a boat?yes
76 - Did you have an accident last year?
no77 - What kind of person are you?i’m still trying to figure that out
78 - Have you ever thought of killing someone?not seriously 
79 - Have you ever been jealous?yeah all the time lol
80 - How can you prove your love to someone?just by being there for them, i think 
81 - What are you thinking right now?that i should be doing homework lol
82 - Who is the 6th person in your contacts?anna. she;s a friend from high school 
83 - Do you have any memories you want to erase?yes. 
84 - Have you been hurt so bad that you can’t find words to explain how you feel?yes. 
85 - Did you ever badmouth someone?l ...yeah lol84- have you ever had an argument with someone?yeah 
87 - Do you have trust issues?yeah; one of my exes lied to me A LOT. 
88 - Are you broken-hearted?a little
89 - Who’s the person who first comes to your mind when someone mentions “love”?i think of my family 
90 - Do you think all the pain is worth it?in the end, i think so 
91 - Do you believe in the phrase “If it’s meant to be, it will be”?it’s always nice to believe in something 
92 - Who do you want to marry?i’m not sure if i ever want to get married
93 - Do you believe in destiny?i’m not sure what i believe in
94 - Have you ever thought “I already found my soulmate”?yes
95 - How do you look right now?like a mess 
96 - Do you believe that first true love never dies?maybe
97 - Have you found your true love?maybe 
98 - What should you be doing right now?homework 
99 - Name one of your ex-boyfriends/ex-girlfriends.sean
100 - What is your sexual orientation?bisexual 
101 - Did you ever feel like you’re not good enough? all the time 
102 - How old are you?19
103 - What age do you get mistaken for?25ish 
104 - Who is your celebrity crush?mindy kaling
105 - What is your OTP?clexa lol 
106 - What is your favorite book/series?the great gatsby 
107 - Who is your favoroite author?marina keegan (she’s my favorite poet)
108 - What is your favorite band?the head and the heart
109 - What is your favorite TV show?the mindy project
110 - What is your favorite movie?when harry met sally 
111- Post a picture of yourself.i don’t think it will let me post in an ask 🤔
112 - Post an old picture of yourselfsame goes for this question