#give this fan artist a job and all the moneys
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copperbora · 11 months ago
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Dear Primus there is so much that I absolutely adore about these designs!!! Like pleeeease someone big in Hasbro with power notice how awesome your designs are, it's almost impossible to even pick a favourite but but but!:
- I LOVE that Prowl is just a tiny, angry little shit.😂
- WHIRL!!!❤️
- Lookin' epic Jazzman!!!
- Tiny cute Perceptor!
- Mirage is so wonderfully fancy!!❤️
- Sides and Sunny look fragging SLICK like those beautiful scrapheaps are DANGEROUS. I loooove them!!! Also are racer frames digitigrade in your continuity?! Because I freaking love that, it makes so much freakin' SENSE! (Same with your seekers and Skyfire AAAAAAH!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️)
- EJECT AND REWIND people Blaster has two of his cassettes I might sob.😭❤️
- SKYFIRE IS HUGE AND I WANNA HUG HIM.
- Beachcomber is hilarious and I love him
- Arcee!!! Her butt and thighs! Lady is STRONG!!❤️
- Hound is so adorable I wanna hug him and be his best friend because I love nature too!!!
- Your style is just so cute and cuddly and comforting to look at, I fully adore it. 🥺❤️
Do you have a post like this for the Decepticons yet?!❤️ Does Starscream have his trine?!❤️
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the full lineup of the earth stranded autobots
posted some these before but now I added characters and updated most of the old designs so yee
also if you art intrested in the main human cast they can be found here
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because-its-eurovision · 1 year ago
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I fully get the anxiety of feeling like you don’t deserve to go to a show. It comes with the whole competetive fandom stuff.
Honestly, as someone who has performed on a lot of stages with varying kinds of crowds, the most important thing isn’t if you’re the biggest fan or if you know the lyrics or some choreography or bring gifts. The thing that is the most valuable is that you go to the show to have a good time. That’s all the artists are generally looking for. That people enjoy their music, enjoy the show, are excited to be there.
Some people may be disappointed that they don’t get a ticket, sure. But it’s not you taking that ticket away from them. Not everyone can have everything. Sometime people don’t get concert tickets. That is not your fault for buying. It is a thing that happens when everyone has the right to buy concert tickets instead of them being raffeled off or gifted. If the show was just for the biggest fans, tickets would be give out as competition prices, not to the person who buys them.
And there is no right way to enjoy the show. Some superfans never learn lyrics because they don’t particularly care. Some people buy tickets to go see random artists just for the experience. Some people just love to give gifts and find that to be the best way of interacting. Your way of doing it is just as valid as all that. You don’t have to earn any right to be there, that is what the tickets are for.
And honestly, you’d be surprised by the number of people who have never even heard of an artist or band who just show up for the show because they had a day off and it could be fun. It’s not about deserving to be there. It’s about wanting to go and getting the chance to actually do that.
I don’t know if this little pep talk eases your mind at all, but I hope it does. Learning to let go of the competetive mindset and attitude when it comes to regular life stuff is a chore and a half. I just want you to know that I would love for you to go to the show.
Thank you for reaching out. I really appreciate it ❤
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clamsjams · 1 year ago
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this might be an abnormal take but i consider youtubers tweeting about how they’re looking for people to work for them to be unprofessional at best and downright exploitative at worst
#tbh i’m even being a bit generous with giving the at best bit#bc i do wanna believe that these guys are good people and don’t want to exploit anyone#but it’s still shitty#bc who are the people who r going to see these tweets? their fans#and obviously there’s always going to be an imbalanced power dynamic between an employee and their boss#but if the employee is a fan then it tips that unbalanced dynamic even further#they’re almost definitely gonna let the youtuber get away with a lot of stuff bc they’re a fan#and like i’m not even talking about shit like grooming even tho that does set up a perfect environment for it#like i wanna believe that these youtubers have good intentions#but they may not understand stuff like how much money is reasonable to pay for these jobs and stuff like that#and get away with it#and the most common thing i see this for is like thumbnails and video art#so u could argue that they want someone familiar with their videos or something#but then they should mention that in the job description#or go out and find someone like look through fanart tags and find an artist to commission#which would definitely have its own set of problems but i think that would be better than a tweet at least#and like the problem here isn’t necessarily just tweeting about hiring ppl#like companies tweet that they’re hiring all the time and then the tweet has a link to like a linkedin page#or the job page on the company’s website#don’t get me wrong linkedin and indeed and other sites like them are shitty and annoying to use#but they do a lot to legitimize a job posting and set up a professional experience from the start#(looking at u quackity studios)#mcyt#minecraft youtube#discourse#qsmp#posts from the ocean#minecraft yt#youtube#tag rants
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literalgrill · 10 months ago
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Do NOT Support Hard Drive On Patreon
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You might see friends today suggesting you support Hard Drive on Patreon today. You know, the funny video games version of The Onion? As a journalist, I will firmly tell you DO NOT GIVE THEM A DIME.
The CEO has pushed out all former staff that have built the site up to its current greatness and has been pushing the use of AI. The staff begged to have a Patreon before basically all being pushed out, but the idea was refused until now, when it will only line the pockets of a single person instead of hard working writers.
I know they might have provided laughs before, but Hard Drive is a shell of what it was once. Let it die and support the people who actually made those moments of joy possible. Don't believe me? Check out what former employees are saying below:
Kevin Podas: Okay you know what, I would feel bad saying nothing about this, so here goes:🚨SAVE YOUR MONEY🚨
We passionately advocated for a Patreon at Hard Drive & were aggressively shot down. The talent & people who built the site were pushed out. To see this now is beyond upsetting. For the past few years or so I put a lot of myself into this website. I pitched a ton of jokes, got over 120 articles published, & met a lot of great people. I'm sure if you've been following me for some time you could easily see this.
However, there is a lot of misinformation. I was eventually promoted to Managing Editor of the site & was ecstatic. Grateful for the opportunity. Felt like all of my hard work in the comedy mines was finally paying off. But things took a turn for the worst, & each day there were new surprises that affected our livelihoods. These were all very avoidable surprises, mind you.
A patreon was going to be our hail mary, but alas, for some reason, the power that be did not want it. Causing us to leave a dream job behind. "At least we did all we could," we consoled ourselves afterwards. I put a lot of myself into this project. I pitched all sorts of ideas that could have helped-- we all did. Merch collaborations, Patreon-integrated YouTube content, so much more. And most of them were shot down out of sheer stubbornness and nothing more. To see lie after lie spread, and multiple big publications and YouTubers that I am a fan of promote this Patreon under these pretenses is incredibly upsetting. There are so many receipts.
Please share this and consider pulling out if you've already put money into this. On Hard Drive using AI, also from Kevin Podas: I can't personally confirm that part aside from some of the recent header images for articles on both Hard Drive and Hard Times are being made with AI. As far as writing, it's been mentioned in the past, but I personally do not know. Maybe others do, maybe not. MORE From Kevin Podas suggesting the owner denying a Patreon being set up earlier cost an artist a job that was replaced by AI: We had a social media person who was awesome! He made the images until this AI implementation. He had to leave because ad revenue was low and a Patreon was aggressively refused.
Luca Fisher: at the risk of burning some bridges, i have to back up kevin here. i've only been part-time, in-and-out of hard drive since i got in last year, but i can corroborate that management doubled and tripled down about not hosting a patreon/crowdfunding and that many other suggestions and ideas, including mine (and ones much smarter than mine!), were shot down in really long, apocalyptic threads of everyone left on deck desperately trying to come up with ways to keep the lights on. managerially it has been messy and sad
i've written for multiple publications that have long since died, ones that were in the process of dying, and ones that, in this case, are soon to be put in the ground. it is sad and sucks every time. i don't know what could have been done differently, but i do know that a lot of great writers and content creators were left shorthanded and unhappy by the way things have gone. and it is sort of puzzling to see the sudden championing of patreon after we were all told plenty of times that it couldn't work and we should move on also, just to add my own personal two cents here, i was really disappointed by the shuttering of many different article sections on the site over the past 6-8 months. i understand cutting corners in a deficit, and i know it had to be done. that said…
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all in all, i'm really sad to see this all happen. i don't fault anyone, if only because i don't really know enough about how this all can happen to make sense of it. games journalism is in a sad, sorry state, and will likely no longer be a thing in the next decade
VideoSealMan: I'm gonna say this because I think I deserve to. For months, MONTHS on end I was bugging Hard Drive management about a Patreon. Often I got ignored for a week+, but when I actually got a response I was encouraged to - of all things, write up a Google Doc pitching the concept I did it regardless. I wasn't the only one trying to sway management on a Patreon, but so fiercely was I fighting for it that last night, I was accused of making this comment directly by the CEO! With no evidence whatsoever! After I'd been gone for over a month.
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I vouched so hard for Patreon because I wanted all the writers and creatives working with Hard Drive including myself to get paid better. When I actually got a response, the idea was often shut down. Eventually due to the state of my company, my pay was cut for a second time I confronted management alongside a couple other important figureheads at the org and told them that if we couldn't do a Patreon - I could no longer financially justify staying there. The answer was still no, so I left. Baffled at the decision, but whatever.
It is unendingly frustrating to know that myself and many other people who put their soul into Hard Drive LEFT because of management's absolute refusal to compromise on a Patreon, to then see them launch one anyway a month later and get over 1000 people pledging money. I'm seeing a lot of things float around about greed and people being fired. No one was fired. Everyone who left, left because they were sick of management's decision-making. And honestly, management is a lot of things but I would not call them greedy. (From my experience.) They did genuinely make an effort to pay people as much as possible. I found the pay very fair for a while. I am not disputing that I was paid what I was owed - yet management frequently feels the need to remind critics of that. Lmao, yes. I was paid what I was owed. No one is disputing payment. You did the bare minimum a business owner should do and paid everyone their due, very well done. I make no allegations of greed, cheating or foul play. I make allegations of poor management and incompetence that has fucked over other people.
Basically the only people left at Hard Drive have been there for about 2 months. They will reap the rewards of this successful Patreon I and so many others passionately fought for for so long. We will not see a dime.
I do not know the new people at Hard Drive, But I feel bad for them. They were haphazardly thrust into Hard Drive's workplace with little to no explanation on how anything works, or given any context on the state of the place. Even now managements feeds them half-truths and misinformation about other people's grievances. I am broke and have been for a while. I had to move out of my flat in Reading and back with my family because of how little money I was making. This has basically doomed my flatmate to moving back in with abusive parents, which is something I feel guilty about every day. If we had gone with the Patreon I worked myself hoarse over back then, this could have been avoided. Some of my other good pals could also not have been fucked over.
It was a bad judgment call, but it's not a crime. It's just management getting it wrong.
So should you give to the Hard Drive Patreon? I don't know! I don't think any of the new people working there to patch up the holes left by the recent mass exodus have any bad intentions. Maybe they deserve it! But it is not the same site you knew a year ago, or even a month ago. Myself and many people who were there far longer than me and did far more for it than I did are all gone now because we could not deal with management's terrible decision-making and dogass communication any longer. That's what you should know, imo
I had an agreement in place with management that I would receive the next 8 months of revenue from the Hard Drive YT channel from my leaving in November. This was a deal I appreciated, and thought was very fair on management's behalf. So far, the deal has been honoured for 2 months. However as of last night I was removed from the Hard Drive Slack without warning, and as an editor for the YouTube channel. This means I no longer have any way of verifying how much I am owed, I just have to take their word for it. I'm sure management will make their own statements full of half-truths and weird language on the many cases being brought against them - I'd take everything they say with a pinch of salt if some of the screenshots I've seen of them talking about me are any indication lol
To management; I do not want to talk to you. I want you to DM me a screenshot of how much I'm owed every month and then send me the money per our agreement until June, then we can go our separate ways. Do that and admit to your mistakes, and maybe you can recover your reputation! That's it from me, lol. If they pull out of the deal and fuck me over I'll have more to say, but most of what I know is other people's stories of incompetence and poor decision-making, lol. I genuinely get no pleasure out of doing this; I do not think management is evil - I just think they're really bad at what they do and it's cost other, more talented people, lol. You should believe the writers imo
One last thing I wanna say btw, management did often stress that no one should try to make Hard Drive a full time thing. They were transparent about that, and that is fair. I was working on it because at a few points, I was lead to believe we actually were doing a Patreon. Many other ppl have similar stories of being strung along by management changing their minds and stop-starting shit every 2 weeks. We all made the fatal mistake of overestimating our manager - who would tell you one thing one day and something totally opposite the next week lol
Hunter R. Thompson:
I'm not your dad, but speaking as a Hard Drive writer, I don't know that funding Hard Drive on Patreon is worth it
The driving talent on the back end—behind the kickass site I joined in 2019—have peaced out over the years as the site's been (in our view) increasingly mismanaged. Mismanagement like, not setting up crowdfunding before the ship sank and all its best crew failed; or publishing a screenshot of Andy Ngo pedojacketing a trans writer, complete with her deadname; or a disgruntled ex-writer getting falsely accused of shit-talk, by actual staff. I'm grateful for the writing I've gotten to produce for HD (and will forever be kicking myself for not writing even more, in the four years I've had to do it!! i'm a dumbass!!!) but it is very much no longer the site I signed up for.
I don't want to resign as a contributor altogether, because I'm open to the idea of the site recovering and bad practices being retired as finances level out-- it would just be dishonest for potential backers to not be Aware Of The Circumstances, I think.
Jeremy Kaplowitz: i truly don't want to start shit, but feel compelled to say: i want to see Hard Drive succeed w/o resorting to throwing former writers & editors, myself included, under the bus. surely there's a way to save the site without building it over the corpses of those who left. my $0.02 i don't blame anyone who wants to sign up for the HD patreon and i support the website, but that includes those who worked on it for years, have complaints, and don't deserve to be treated like bitter assholes like this kind of stuff is just objectively true, meanwhile there's these new writers who joined the site after i left (meaning, in the last ~3 months) claiming people are liars. decide for yourself if you care, but this is what happened! [Quotes this Tweet]
Seth Finkelstein: Writing for Hard Drive has been a privilege the past few years, and it makes me so angry to see people I looked up to get jerked around behind the scenes. The amount of grenades the editors jumped on our behalf is immense, and I don't think the way they're being treated is right.
Other Bits On AI: We do know for sure however that AI art has been used by the site. Its fucking owner confirms it here:https://twitter.com/MattSaincome/status/1743040541603123622. Seems the owner pushed AI written articles as well! TayFabe: My vaguetweet is making the rounds & these made me apoplectic. - owner regularly lobbied using ai. Once he tested it & said ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. - ai images were used on the site & socials w/o consulting the team or disclosing it publicly I found the ai bit relevant to include bc 1) it illuminates a stark change in HD's current direction & leadership, 2) ai images have previously been used on the site and (since deleted) ig posts, 3) ai content fucking sucks, and repeatedly pushing to use it is a telling quality The "handful of writers who chose to leave" includes 2 editors-in-chief (both cofounders who wrote a combined total of >1,000 articles & defined the voice of HD), & at least 3 other editors. These guys put in WORK since 2017, so cool to be corrected by ppl who joined in Nov 2023 [Link to mentioned vague tweet from post.] More from TayFabe: owner continuously lobbied for using ai in every possible way. No one else wanted to do it, but he kept on, saying ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. Also, ai images were used on the site & socials without public disclosure or consulting the team.
The owner has responded now multiple times in a private discord... Thank you for people sharing screenshots! First Screenshot:
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Kevin's Response: He banned me from the server for speaking out, so no, I didn't see it. And he gave no indication of a timeline, it was just "we'll do one when *I* say so" and gave every inclination he was totally against it. It bred an environment that pushed our hands to have to leave. Screenshot Round Two:
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Kevin's Response: "Starting one in 3 months" is an absolute lie. He denied it, I have screenshots and others who can confirm. No timeline was given. Just "this is what it is now" and like, I couldn't live off of that. I wanted to do more but he was allergic to good ideas from others around him.
Matt, owner of Hard Drive, responds publicly on Twitter.
Matt: Kevin, the patreon launch was delayed because I didn't think it would work. Everyone is happy that it did work. Everyone who left the site because we didn't have money to pay for creative content which didn't revenue is welcome to return home. But unclear why the hostility.
Hard Drive paid out literally every dollar it had, then a bunch more, to creative people who worked on the site. When we ran out of money, we couldn't pay anymore. We did our best.
Kevin: Right, and my point of this thread was that it was completely and totally avoidable. This is reasonable to be upset about. How could I have been any more clear?
Matt: If we knew with 100% certainly that the community would have supported us via patreon, we would have done that. We didn't know. We had tried 4 years ago and got no support. We were wrong this time. We did our best to figure it out. We paid all the money we could.
Kevin: So you knew with 100% certainty this time? Or you took a leap of faith?
Matt: It was a last gasp panic effort after ad rates got cut in half on january 1st due to seasonal spending changes. We didn't know it would work. We were embarrassed to ask for support. We wanted to figure it out.
Kevin: Every site has a Patreon. Every YouTuber, comedy group, etc. But you insisted that nobody cared about Hard Drive. Which is wildly untrue. I know you see that now, but again, I think you can see why I and many others are pretty upset. A last ditch panic effort was long overdue. A couple more things from Matt:
It was about the size of the hole we needed plugged budget wise, the time I had left of personal resources, and the past data I had about us trying a patreon (which turned out to be a bad indicator). I didn't think the Patreon would help us fast enough. I made a bad estimation
aka "if we make $1000 more dollars a month via patreon, which would be 10x what we got last time, we will not solve any of our problems. If instead we try to plow down path B, we might make it out in time." That was the thinking. I chose the wrong path, but didn't mean to Kevin also retweeted this comment from the user Matt was responding to: So you're saying that you're bad at running the business, didn't listen to any of your employees until after they were forced to leave their jobs, and now you're going to get more of the money from the Patreon that was their idea in the first place? Matt's Response: Respectfully, I made a mistake delaying the patreon decision. But keeping a comedy site alive for 9 years is not easy, there are lots of potential ideas, and think overall we've done a good and honorable job. Will leave this thread in peace now to allow people their space.
Sorry for linking to Elon's hellsite (derogatory), but sources need links so...
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nyashykyunnie · 3 months ago
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˗ˏˋ Jinwoo x Isekaid! Artist! Reader ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡ ˎˊ˗
ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕘 𝕁𝕚𝕟𝕨𝕠𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ
・┆✦ Entry : 044 ✦ ┆・
[Tw: I think this fall under depictions of depression and panic attacks. Please, if you're not in the headspace, do not read this. ]
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╰┈➤ ❝ [ My Muse] ¡! ❞
Isekaing to Solo Leveling is one thing, but living in this world is just... Way too brutal for your poor heart.
Why is that? Anxiety is a major enemy.
What do you mean everyone else is living normally not having little paranoid moments that lead to panic attacks with overtaking at the possibility of a gate opening somewhere near you and monsters would come out?
Sung Jinah's school wasn't even safe. How are you gonna live?
Anyway.
You have a job to do.
Even though you just wanna spend all of your time crying in the corner of your room and praying to god to protect you when technically you aren't even religious.
But what are you to do?
It's not like Sung Jinwoo will swoop in and save you from misery.
...Hahah, if only.
You are one of his more delulu fans, like every other girl in this country— You are a big fan.
Well, except the fact that you know far more things about Jinwoo since you came from a world where he is fiction.
The flex you have is that you know how awfully adorable that petty bastard is when he was still an E-ranker. Those Jinwoo simps will never know the fact that Jinwoo has the fluffiest and softest looking cheeks ever.
Not to mention, you have all of his powers memorized to even the titles those powers have. You can name a lot of his shadows.
Of course the easiest to name are Beru, Igris, Bellion, Kaisel, Tank,.... And the easiest,... One, two, three, four.... Yeah, you get it.
But why are you being so smug? As if you 're not the same fool who secretly buys Jinwoo polaroids. Coming from this country full of fangirls is a haven for you since there is quite... The plethora of Jinwoo trinkets.
And you, being a lovestruck fool, went all in and took "Take all my money" to the next level even though the man you're obsessing over is 10x more richer than you.
But ah, this isn't the time to fawn over your Jinwoo merch paradise.
You have work.
Thankfully enough, this world has given you mercy. Despite it preying on your paranoid self, it gave you the blessing of living the life you've always wanted.
And that is to be a freelance artist.
Not doing your average 9-5, crying about the lack of fame you receive that hinders the pathway to making a successful art career, not having to listen to family members berating your love for art as low as a drug abuse.
In this world, no one is going off about your craft, no one is belittling your passion to something akin to a crime.
Like it's just a pathetic hobby and there's no meaning to all the hard work you put in the past years improving your skills, there's no value to being able to draw squares and circles more impressive than others, there's nothing note worthy of being able to pick and choose colours— There's none of that.
To be honest, there was even lots of moments where you wanted to give up, where you realized maybe they're right.
Even if you had starved yourself just to save up for your art materials, even if you work hard micro-analyzing your artstyle, even if you spent hours studying the algorithms, even if you shed blood sweat and tears just for the glimmer of hope that maybe you can turn your art into something more— It's all just delusions.
Like how you hope to be one of those big artists who inspire other people to create their own pieces. Like how you secretly hope that maybe your artworks can bring a smile to anyone's face if they come across it. Like how you silently pray to every single star that may your wish come true.
You wanted to keep hoping, for the slim chance of having a single magnus opus that will instantly put you in the limelight— You wanted to keep having your hand outstretched to that tiny light.
But everyday, with each piece, you start to realize that your dreams are all for nothing.
You had been so focused on art that it's the only thing you have that defines who you are as a person and as an individual.
Art is what made you human.
Slowly, your innocent dreams molded itself into a twisted and vile poison that ate you from the inside out. Your love for creating backfired and now it's a blur if your passion stems from adoration or you just ran with it because it's the only thing that made you feel relevant in this world.
Maybe you should give up.
Even if there is a drastic improvement in your art with each piece, what good is it if it can't guarantee that career you oh so desperately want? The big artists say that you should make art for yourself, well yeah, they're right. But what if even if you do that it doesn't work?
Colour theory, shape language, line language, composition— All of those improved out of sheer love to learn. You've seen other people around you get careers out of it so it will happen to you?
Right?...
Right?
You're not a problematic artist, you don't make trouble, you don't make enemies, you don't participate in drama, you stay humble and eloquent.
Surely it will work... Right?...
Hahah.
In that world?
No it didn't.
It did not.
You died in your deathbed after being involved in a hit and run.
And after a long period of slumber, you have awoken in this world where somehow you are a renowned artist.
It felt shallow, really.
Suddenly having all of that in a snap of a finger through death?
Hah.
It felt like it mirrors Jinwoo's life. Except he had rightfully earned the flory of his powers.
Truthfully, you love him because of that.
What was it?
Ah yes.
"Because I was rock bottom, I longed for the highest peak."
That was the line that made you love him.
As someone who had no future in your art career, it was that line that made your heart yearn for him.
Two unfortunate souls who struggle in the same thing in different dimensions, except one managed to create that dream into reality.
Sure, you have the glory now. And although it made you so happy, it still felt so shallow because you didn't achieve this through hardwork. You just had to die.
You had to be dead.
It took dying to be given the mercy of having your dreams be granted.
And that just made you feel so... So awful.
⋅ ˚ ₊ ‧ ଳ ‧ ₊ ˚ ⋅ ⋆ ౨ৎ ˚ ⟡ ˖ ࣪
With a canvas on one hand, your painting materials neatly arranged in a bag in the other hand— You take a deep breath and enter the party.
Brilliant golden lights twinkle above your head coming from the magnificent chandelier hanging above. Cameras flashing, the clinking of glasses as hunters and celebrities discussed amongst themselves dressed in luxurious outfits and blinging jewelry.
The sight made your stomach sink and a lump in your throat forming.
This is an entirely different world you knew from the lonely greys and blues.
You look around frantically, almost panicking at the overwhelming chatter and blinding lights.
"Ah, you're here" A voice snaps you out of it.
You turn to see your sponsor, Choi Jong-in flashing a polite and handsome smile. You bow your head politely.
"Please," Jong-in simply shakes his head, "No need to be so polite. I am pleased that you have arrived in time. Champagne?"
He extends a glass towards you and you shake your head, sheepishly saying "O-oh... I'm not really an alcohol enjoyer. I'm fine."
"Ah, I see" He nods apologetically before gesturing you to a clearer space.
Jong-in escorts you to a less crowded area of the ball, the lessened crowd and noise calming your accelerated heartbeat down.
"If there is anything you need, please feel free to call me or the waiters" He says kindly, "You are also free to eat food."
"Thank you, Mr. Choi" You bow politely.
Before he could even reply, Jong-in was called over by a beautiful blonde girl you knew all too well.
Cha Hae-in.
She's as lovely as she was in the manhwa panels, with that red dress and her neatly tied hair— She was a sight to behold.
But as soon as you see a tall man clad in black, you feel a distinct thump in your heart, a twisting kind of small pain that made you feel like it stopped beating along with the way your lungs stopped breathing— You knew who it was.
"A guest?..." He inquires, making your heart thump even harder at the sound of that deep voice you only heard through the speakers of your phone and laptop.
"Mr. Sung, I'm glad you could make it along with my vice master" Jong-in hums, "This is an artist I'm sponsoring, I thought it would be a good idea to commemorate this important event celebrating humanity's win against the gates"
"Ah, I see" Jinwoo's handsome grey eyes would sweep onto your anxious form who is fidgeting uncontrollably in her hands. "I'm Sung Jinwoo,"
He extends a hand, making you look up at him with an even nervous look. It took you a while to extend your hand, and the moment your palm touched his— You felt as of you're touching someone from a different species. Something too unreal and dovine.
You barely had even managed to speak your name out with how much of a nervous wreck you are. Shaking his hand didn't happen if it weren't for Jinwoo gently doing it and letting you pull your hand away.
Your palms may have been trembling, but now it's even more erratic as you step back, not meeting his gaze.
Thank gods Jong-in decided to start a conversation to pivot Jinwoo's attention away from you.
As you attempt to calm yourself with a persistent panic attack, you feel a soft tap on your hands.
"Thank you for coming, I-I hope you enjoy your time" Hae-in says in her hesitant voice.
And you, who cant mutter a single word after your very first encounter with Jinwoo— Only muster a polite nod at her as she turns away to join Jong-in and Jinwoo in their conversation.
You were on a trance for almost five minutes, before finally deciding to set up your easel and canvas. You took out two different mason jars and filling them up with water; the gouache paint you will be using as a medium; the ceramic palette you have been using for quite a while now; and finally gently arranging your brushes.
Jong-in didn't specify what you should be painting for this event. But decided to paint the stage. An hour into the event, Jinwoo would start giving his speech as he is the main hero of the war against the gates and monarchs—As well as the person this whole event is dedicated to.
You had to pause in your process of painting the canvas, just to give respect to Jinwoo.
Your idol.
Your role model.
The man of your dreams.
His words aren't even registering as you can't help but be lost in a trance as he continues with his speech. Unconsciously, your hand raised itself and started to paint carefully, your eyes fixated on the hunter as your hand moved with a mind on its own.
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Jong-in was extremely worried for the artist he had hired, he could tell from earlier she was having a panic attack with the hesitance. And when Jinwoo came into the picture, it seemed to frighten her all the more. He quietly called for his secretary to add at least 40% more of the initial payment that was planned to compensate for the unintentional distress he had put her onto.
While Jinwoo was giving his speech, he couldn't help but check on her by glancing from the distance.
In that canvas, he saw the stage, and in that stage was Jinwoo.
The artist was carefully painting Jinwoo.
Delicate strokes despite her eyes not on the cloth and brush. She was just mindlessly moving her hand as she looks at Jinwoo.
"Ah... I see it now."
Jong-in quietly smiles to himself.
It wasn't that she was frightened of Jinwoo's intimidating presence. No way does someone scared of a person have that same intense look with such dilated pupils.
With a determined hum, Jong-in knew exactly what to do.
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It had been three days since that event, and Jinwoo was attending to paperwork when he was informed of Jong-in's visit.
He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose with a bit of worry that his 'senior' might scold him for renting out gates in territory of Hunter's guild.
To his surprise, Jong-in entered carrying a rather large thing into his office.
"???" Jinwoo cocks up an eyebrow, silently inquiring Jong-in at what is the thing he brought in.
"Take a look, hunter Sung" Jong-in simply says and the hunter reluctantly stood up from his chair to approach the item his senior placed down.
When Jinwoo pulled off the protective cloth, he was met with a brilliant painting that felt like it was straight out of a renaissance era painting.
The red curtains were blood red and shaded softly. The wood is delicately painted, with even tiny specks that indicates the painter's exquisite attention to detail, but most importantly— His eyes were drawn to the middle, where a man stood center.
It was him.
His face was delicately painted, even his tousled black locks were intricately painted to imitate the way his strands behaved, his body language was painted in a relaxed but still managed to somehow translate the undertone of authority and power he held over the crowd that was purposely painted in a blurry manner to give more focus to him. Even the lighting of the stage was expertly imitated on the canvas.
The piece looked as if its goal was to put emphasis on his—the man who is standing in the golden limelight. As if it were trying to put him on a divine pedestal, to show him off as this some sort of god woth the painting.
"Who?..." Jinwoo finally manages to inquire.
"The artist chose you as her muse for the painting" Jong-in says, fixing his tie as he does so. "Quite the talent, no? Even us hunters who have quite the skill in the art of combat, are taken aback by such craft. It was as if she had magic on her very fingertips despite being just a civilian."
"Her muse," Jinwoo repeats, not knowing what to feel about it.
"It would be... Quite indecent of me to keep a portrait of a rival in my guild, no?" Jong-in coughs out, making Jinwoo awkwardly nod. "Consider it as a gift and a thank you for assisting my guild in jeju raid as well as your role in the war."
"I have quite the awards really, no need" He shakes his head.
"Yes," Jong-in glances back at the painting. "But I think that you, as the painter's muse, must see for yourself this piece created on your image."
"Mn...."
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Jinwoo quite frankly grew curious of the little painter he met and made him the centerpiece of her painting. He was honestly worried at first, she was so small compared to him and she was trembling at the sight of him. It didn't help that he noticed how she grew more shaken after they exchanged pleasantries.
Maybe he had gripped her hand a little too much.
Beru on the other hand, was visibly very pleased at the painting as well as the other shadows who wont shut up about it.
Throughout his monotonous days and hours, Jinwoo would often think of the painter.
It feels... Weird to be in someone's painting.
It's unreal even.
But ah... By chance, he met that pleasant little painter again.
She was in the bookstore, picking up several heavy books. When he approached her, she was flustered and nearly dropped the books she was purchasing if it weren't for him assisting her.
Just like their first meeting, she was clearly bashful and anxious. So Jinwoo made space between them and made small talk.
Somehow, their small talks would develop into long and meaningful ones with the days passing of them having frequent encounters.
There is this tiny, tiny warmth in Jinwoo's heart whenever he finds himself in the presence of his painter.
His heart whom he thought had lost its capability to harbor affection— Is beating fast whenever he crosses paths with her.
There is... Something about her.
Her little habits, her never ending curiosity, her childish habits and her love for everything beautiful. Somehow, everything in her eyes has the potential to be a piece of artwork.
Jinwoo was never a creative soul, he's only ever creative at insults maybe.
So to see someone so dedicated to her own craft, to see someone so full of love for something... It's like peering into a different world he never thought was there.
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Go Gunhee decided to visit Jinwoo, it was to thank the hunter again with coffee beans and two— Just to visit Jinwoo.
"Ah, hunter Sung," Gunhee smiles as the person he waited for appears. "I hope you don't mind, I just wanted to pop in"
"Not at all, director" Jinwoo smiles politely.
"That piece," The old man's gaze drifts to a painting hun by Jinwoo's side. "What a magnificent work of art. I heard Hunter Choi gifted it to you after the artist he hired decided to put you as the centerpiece. Truly such remarkable talent by a younger lady."
"Yes, hahah" Jinwoo awkwardly rubs his nape.as he serves Gunhee a cup of tea.
"My father told me that artists have a special kind of love" Gunhee hums, reminiscing. "He told me that having an artist love you is different. A writer glorifies you into pleasant words, a musician translates your beauty into compelling music and a painter immortalises all of you in a single painting. A blank canvas is a tool by painters that they use to communicate. All the ugliness of the world can be put into ink, and all the beauty into wonderful pops of pleasant colors"
He continues, "And through my years, this is one of the few most magnificent pieces I've ever seen that shows the painter's love for it's muse"
"Her muse," Jinwoo repeats it, "I've been told the same thing."
"A lovely feeling, no?" Gunhee chuckles, "To be loved by a person so full of love."
"...So that's what it means"
"..."
The old man's face wrinkles into a happier smile.
Young love, truly beautiful, isn't it?
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"That colour is really pretty" You mutter absentmindedly glance at the flowing water underneath, as if trying to ingrain the memory and behaviour of it.
"Thinking of a new artwork, again?" Jinwoo asks, glancing down at the direction you were staring at. "I can't wait to see what you'll make."
"Your pieces are always so beautiful"
It felt as if something struck an arrow at your heart, you glance at Jinwoo— Completely frozen in state.
When he noticed the heavy silence, his eyes would befall on you before his mouth going a little agape.
You're crying.
"Did... I say something wrong?..." Jinwoo asks and you panic, immediately tearing your gaze away.
"No, no, no" You shake your head, hiding your shameful tears from Jinwoo.
Compliments with your art were never really foreign, but you, being the insecure sad soppy excuse of a human being would always downplay it most of the time.
You were never truly satisfied with yourself and anything you ever made. Mostly because you came from a household where everything is never enough.
Ultimately, that system has been fully ingrained into your body that it became your personality.
Colors are muddy, the lines aren't steady or too thick or thin, the anatomy is off, the composition isn't fluid and the harmony is all over the place.
You were always, always, critical of yourself.
Nothing is ever enough.
Your works aren't beautiful enough, and you thought they never will be.
But when Jinwoo told you your art was beautiful, it caused something to crack inside and burst open.
Maybe it's because you loved him so much. Maybe it's because he is the person you admire the most in your sorry, lonely life.
It was always Jinwoo who was in your mind whenever you had those bad episodes of just having silent mental breakdowns.
It's his image that became your most beloved saviour.
Perhaps you're sobbing because you're finally able to hear the words you've imagined he would during the times you daydreamed about him.
Or maybe... Your body reacted because you knew deep down that Jinwoo was never a liar.
That he didn't say those words out of empty praise, that he said your crafts is beautiful because they simply are.
In your broken, shattered heart a heavy yet soft warmth swelled. Swelling so much that you felt so overwhelmed and couldn't control your emotions.
That kind of validation just felt like it washed away all the doubts that plagued you for years.
As you cried uncontrollably, Jinwoo would instinctively reach his hand out and pull you in for a searing kiss. His tongue gently nudges your lips before shoving itself into it.
One flick.
Two flicks
Three flicks,...
Until you yourself cant even count it anymore.
He pulls back slowly, but still not far enough for you not to feel his hot breath fanning over your cheeks.
"I only said your paintings are beautiful and yet you are crying like this, sarang?" He rubs his nose against yours, "Just what happened to you that you're this emotional, hm? Did you not think what you make is stunning? Did you never once think that your pieces are captivating? Why are you crying like this? How hurt have you been that it feels like you're crying out this kind of sorrow I can't seem to understand?"
"Why does your sobs feel like you've been dealing with such loneliness that a simple sincere compliment breaks you to this extend?"
"Everything about you is beautiful. All of you is beautiful." Jinwoo says in that ever so gentle voice of his, "Never doubt that for even a single second."
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꒰ 🪼 A/N: what started as another simple fluffy idea turned into something more... Personal :'DD. Sorry guys hahahahsheshdg. Idk when I will have the free time to make the second half of the cai bots yet but please look out for when I do. ꒱
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ʚ(੭´͈ ᐜ `͈)੭ .。✧・゚: ~♡ — All stories written by kyunnie; translations, reposts, plagiarism are strictly forbidden.
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queen-of-deans-booty · 28 days ago
Text
Never Give Up
Pairing: Rockstar!Jensen Ackles x Female!Reader
Word Count: ~2.5k
Warnings: complete fluff, getting blood drawn so needles and blood
Summary: Jensen is in town for his next concert and visit you for a check-up before performing. You two have known each other for your whole life since his sister is your best friend, and he never fails to ask you out every time he sees you. You’ve always said no. It’s his mission to get you to say yes.
Square Filled: rockstar!jensen (2022) for @spndeanbingo
Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3
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You grab another vial of blood and mark down in the system which patient of yours this belongs to. Afterward, you place it inside a medical plastic bag and set it off to the side for the lab to pick up later. Today has been non-stop tending to patients, drawing blood, and taking vitals. You’re only halfway through your shift and you feel like your head is going to explode.
“Did you see his post?” another nurse asks as she and her friend walk into the office. “God, he looks so hot. I can’t believe he’s single.”
“I bet he’s fucking random fans every show he does. I could be one of those fans if I got tickets. Can you believe even the nosebleeds are two hundred bucks?”
You don’t need to hear his name to know who they’re talking about. There is only one artist that is big enough in the news right now. He’s been on a steady incline to fame ever since he left Texas for California.
“Do you think he’s good in bed?”
You roll your eyes at that but don’t comment on it. You just want to do your job and go home. You can’t be sitting here thinking about your best friend’s brother and how much of an arrogant bastard he is who thinks the world revolves around him. It doesn’t help that he has a major crush on you, and he isn’t afraid to show it. Besides him telling you every time he calls you how much he likes you, he’ll always try to show you either with flowers, dinner, or other small presents that he has mailed to you.
There isn’t a time that goes by when he’s with you that he doesn’t try and ask you out on a date. If he was just your best friend’s brother, you would consider it. It’s the fact that he’s an up-and-coming rockstar who isn’t near his peak that has you on the edge. You know rockstars. You dated a few of them. All they care about is music, money, and sex. They’ll get it anywhere from any woman who is willing to spread her legs for them. You’re not saying Jensen is like that, but you don’t want to be a notch on his belt.
Still, that doesn’t stop you from using your vibrator and fantasizing about him.
A few days pass without incident when you’re inputting patients into the computer. The same two coworkers who were talking about Jensen before come strolling in with big smiles on their faces.
“What’s got you two looking like that?”
“Jensen is in town for his concert.”
“Did you two get tickets?”
“No, but I know of a way inside. I have someone working security.”
You’d rather not sit here and watch them fangirl over him so you decide to finish your paperwork later and check on the patients. Your best friend, Sabrina, pulls you to the side as soon as she sees you.
“I need you to take the patient in Room 15.”
“Why? That’s your section.”
“Please? I can’t do it.”
“Why?” you ask, your eyes narrowing.
“He’s my brother. They won’t let me work on him.”
Jensen is here. You think about what it might mean if he sees you entering the room and think it’s better than sending the fangirls in there with him.
“Fine. You owe me.” You start to walk away from her with the blood draw supplies and pause. “Don’t tell the other girls. They’ll cause a riot.”
You walk to Room 15 and knock twice before entering. Jensen is sitting on the small table with the paper lined for people’s safety even though half the time, it gets crumbled and tossed out of the way. He is scrolling through his phone but it’s not that that has you staring in awe. He is wearing a tight black shirt that really shows off his muscles and tattoos and dusty blue jeans that you know hug his ass so nicely, all with a backward hat on. His hair peeks out the back of his hat. It was shorter than the last time you saw him.
There’s a new image for your fantasies.
“Growing out your hair, huh?”
Jensen’s head snaps up at the sound of your voice, and he gives you a thousand-watt smile. He immediately puts his phone away so that he can give you all of his attention.
“I was hoping Sabrina would send you in here.”
“Oh, you’re lucky it’s me and not the two fangirls out there. I’m pretty sure one of them wants to have sex with you.”
“What about you? Do you want to have sex with me?”
You smile shyly and grab two latex gloves to start the blood-drawing process. “You wish.”
“Yeah, I do.”
You wrap a tourniquet around his upper arm before grabbing his arm and rubbing the area with an alcohol swab to sterilize the area. Don’t think about his big muscles. Focus, Y/N! You open a packet that contains a new needle and place it where you need to. Without counting down, you stick the needle into his vein and start to grab blood samples.
“So, come here often?” he flirts.
“I work here,” you giggle.
“I know. I just wanted to hear your giggle. So, when am I gonna take you out?”
“Hmm, how about never?” you tease.
“Don’t do that to me, sweetheart. Throw me a bone or something.”
“I’m not even going to comment,” you laugh.
You take out the first vial and shove a new one into the case for more blood.
“I’m serious. When are you gonna let me take you out to a nice dinner? I’ll pay.”
“Oh, you will? How generous of you,” you say sarcastically yet playfully.
“Does that mean yes?”
“No.”
“I’m not gonna stop asking you.”
“You’ll turn blue in the face if you continue that.”
“It’s okay,” he shrugs. “I look good in blue.” You roll your eyes and try to hide your smile knowing he sees it. You finish getting four blood samples before patching him up with a Hello Kitty bandaid. You were just treating two twin little girls and this is all you have. “Nice band-aid.”
“It’s all I have. I can get a different one if you want.”
“No, no, I happen to like Hello Kitty.” You trash your gloves and the needle packet before standing. “Come to my concert.”
“I have to work.”
“No, you don’t. It’s on Saturday and you don’t work the weekends.” You silently curse knowing he’s right. “How about this? I will have a VIP and all-access badge with your name on it. Come if you want. It starts at seven. Are we done here?”
“Yeah, but--”
“Give my love to Sabrina.”
He hops of the table and kisses your cheek as he leaves. The two fangirls see him and fawn over his good looks but when he looks back, it’s at you. He only has eyes for you. He winks and turns to the fangirls who are practically tripping over the other to get to him. He signs what they want to be signed and takes pictures with them before leaving.
Today is only Wednesday but you can’t stop thinking about Jensen and his offer the rest of the week. Saturday comes faster than you’d like, and you find yourself driving with Sabrina to the concert hours before it even starts. There are already people lining up to get to the front of the pit but you bypass the entire parking lot to head to the back where the service entrance is.
“I can’t believe I’m going to this,” you say.
“So, when are you and my brother going to fuck?”
“Sabrina!”
“What? If anyone should be with him, it’s you. That boy is in love with you.”
“No, he’s not. He thinks he is because I don’t want him.”
“Does telling yourself that help you sleep at night?”
“Sabrina… He’s a rockstar. He’s a famous rockstar. He doesn’t want some rundown nurse. He could have anyone.”
“Yeah, but he wants you.”
You’re torn because you do want Jensen. He’s every girl’s dream. Even if he wasn’t a rockstar or famous, you’ve known him since you two were kids. You grew up together. You know who the real Jensen is, the one he doesn’t show anyone else. Still, there is that nagging feeling that he'll dump you once he gets bored with you. 
All of your exes did.
You show security both your IDs and he hands you and Sabrina your access badges before directing you where to park. After you two get out, you follow security to the back where the band is hanging out. You’ve gotten to know Jensen’s band a little over the years. They’re nice guys.
“Bean!” Jensen turns and grins when he sees his sister. His drummer has a major crush on your friend and has called her Bean ever since she told him she hated it. They’re in the “will they, won’t they?” stage but everyone knows they’re gonna be endgame. “Where’ve you been?”
“I told you not to call me that,” she rolls her eyes and hugs her brother. 
“And I told you I don’t care. I like how you blush when I do,” he smirks.
Jensen’s gaze goes over to you and he visibly relaxes at the sight of you. He walks over to you and takes off his hat so that his hair falls over his face.
“Hi, Jensen.” He smiles but doesn’t answer you. “What, cat got your tongue? I know I’m breathtaking but come on.”
“He doesn’t speak before a show to preserve his voice. He has breathing exercises to do,” Josh, the drummer, says.
“What a blessing,” you joke.
Jensen pulls you in for a hug, and you allow this minute to really feel him. His arms have always felt so safe around you, and you find yourself relaxing into his body. He pulls away and takes out his phone to text you since he takes his voice exercises seriously. Your phone pings and you look at the message he sent.
I love that you’re here.
You blush under his gaze and try but fail to hide your smile.
“You know I would have come.”
You and Sabrina leave for the VIP tent on the floor while the band gets ready. The opener comes out and does her performance which gives you time to enjoy the music and get some food before Jensen comes on stage. Since you and Sabrina are on Jensen and Josh’s social media, you’re both easily recognizable. Fans come up to the tent to chat and take pictures with you two. You never had a desire for fame but it’s nice to know you’ve made someone’s day just by saying hi to them.
The entire stadium goes dark and the intro to the concert begins. Immediately, the entire crowd cheers for Jensen. He walks on stage in a different outfit than when you saw him earlier, and you have to admit he looks really good. He’s wearing a classic muscle shirt that definitely shows off how much he’s been working out and his tattoos. Gone is his hat so that his hair can flop around freely.
His eyes immediately find the VIP tent, and he smiles when he sees you. You’ve seen his concerts over TikTok Lives and other social media platforms but nothing beats the real thing. He sings each song with passion like he means every word he’s singing. There is a long catwalk where he walks, and all the girls fawn over him whenever he gives them two seconds of his attention.
By the time he’s at the halfway point of his concert, your feet are hurting from how much you’re dancing and your ears are ringing from how loud it is, but you love it. Jensen is in the middle of a song when he suddenly stops and takes out one of his earpieces.
“Wait, wait, wait,” he pants. The band stops playing and everyone quiets down in confusion, including you. He’s never done this at any of his other concerts. “I’ll get back to the music in a second. I just want to say this is a very special concert because there is someone very special here tonight.”
“Oh, my God,” Sabrina gasps.
“Her name is Y/N and she’s right over there in the VIP tent.” The camera pans over to your shocked face so that everyone in the stadium can see. Sabrina can’t stop smiling. “You see, we’ve been friends since we were kids and she doesn’t know this but I am absolutely crazy for her.”
Cheers erupt throughout the stadium, and you shake your head at Jensen with a smile.
“Now, I’ve asked her this many times but she’s always said no to me. I don’t think she’ll be able to say no in a room full of eighty thousand people. Someone get her a microphone. I want to hear her answer.” Jensen waits for someone to bring you a microphone. “Y/N, will you let me take you to a really nice dinner date?”
You wait for the crowd to quiet down a bit before giving your answer.
“No,” you smile sweetly. “You just won’t take no for an answer.”
“You’re right. I won’t.” He drags one of the barstools to the middle of the stage and sits on it. “That’s why we’re not continuing until you say yes.”
“You’re not serious.”
“Oh, I am, sweetheart. I won’t sing another song until you say yes. What do you say, Los Angeles? Should she say yes to me?” Almost every fan in the stadium including Sabrina cheers for you two. “See? Even they think you should.”
“Well if they think we should…”
“Is that a yes?”
“No,” you grin.
“Alright.” Jensen sits and drums his fingers on his legs patiently. “I wonder what I’m going to do next weekend. I think I should take up fishing. My dad always brought me but I never appreciated it before.”
“You’re seriously going to sit there and not continue your concert?” you ask.
“Put everyone out of their misery and just say yes to the date. Come on, everyone. Y/N! Y/N!”
Everyone starts chanting your name, and Sabrina tugs on your arm to grab your attention.
“Has any of your exes done this for you? What are you scared of?”
She’s right. None of your rockstar boyfriends have ever stopped a concert for you. None of them even mentioned you were there. Jensen doesn’t have to say it but he is in love with you and you’re in love with him.
“Fine. Fine. Yes, I’ll go on a date with you.”
“Yes!” Jensen cheers. You hand the microphone back to the stadium worker, and Jensen puts the earpiece back in. “This next song is for you, sweetheart.”
And he plays the song he wrote for you in high school.
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tinkerbelle05 · 1 year ago
Note
could you do like a bookworm kinda quiet reader with E42 Miles?????
I Always Got You, Got That?
Characters: E42!Miles Morales x Fem!reader
Genre: Fluff
Summary: Going on an impromptu bookstore shopping run. (Requested) Thanks for the request sweets 🖤
Warning: none :)
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While sipping your coffee, you continued to walk throughout the mall when you spotted the bookstore. It was practically calling your name but you didn’t have enough money and you already took too much from Miles.
You weren’t exactly sure about what his job actually is, but he made a lot of money from doing that. So realistically he wouldn’t have a problem with you asking but you didn’t wanna seem like some gold-digger. Your mama raised you better than that.
“You wanna go in there?” Miles asked you. He caught you eyeing the place but was confused as to why you didn’t go in.
“Oh, no. We don’t have to go on and it’s probably boring for you,” you answer and turn back around.
“Nah, nah.” He takes your hand and starts pulling you into the store. “If you wanna go in, then go in. And don't worry about the price, you know I always got you.”
“But you already spent a lot on me,” you argue. And he has. Last week, he took you on a date to a fancy restaurant and the week before that a concert to see your favorite artist. Both of those were extremely expensive and you felt guilty about it when you searched up the prices.
“Because as my girlfriend, you deserve to be spoiled. It’s how I show my love.” He gives you a playful pout and comes closer to you, “Are you gonna stop me from showing you how much I love you?”
“Of course not,” you're quick to say.
He gives you a smirk, “Good.” He drags you into the store, “Now shop to your heart’s desire, okay?”
You nod and go deeper into the store. You pick up some books that caught your eye and put them back because they didn’t interest you as much as the others. You weren’t that greedy.
Little did you know Miles was behind you and picking the books back up to buy them. He watched as you went around the store, going into different sections; YA, Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Romance, etc.
Miles loved seeing you smile as your fingers glided on the book spines, he loved the way your eyes lit up as they read the summary of the book. He loved how you talked so passionately about the books you’ve read and are planning to read. The ones you loved with all of your heart and the ones you hate with every fiber of your being.
You turned around to see Miles carrying a stack of books that pales in comparison to the ones you have in your hand. When you looked closer, it was every book that you liked but put back.
“Miles…” you narrow your eyes at him and walk back to meet up with him. “Why are you picking up these books? I didn’t take you for a fan of romance.”
“1, don’t put me into a box and 2, you can’t carry all these books so I’m carrying them for you. That’s why you put them back because they were getting heavy,” he explains and lies without any shame knowing damn well that’s not the reason.
“Now Miles.” You say and stare up at the ceiling to combat the incoming headache. He doesn’t have to keep spending all this money on you.
“Hey.” Miles called out to you and lifted your head by your chin to meet his eyes. “Listen I told you this before and I will tell this until you get it through that pretty little head of yours, hermosa. My money is yours, okay. You need something you got, you want something you got. I’ve always got you, got that?”
He was being so intense about this which was unusual for him since he’s probably the most nonchalant guy you knew. You suspected there was more to this issue, but you decided not to push it. With being a nonchalant, Miles is also not the most emotionally vulnerable person in the world.
You give him a smile, “Okay then, don’t come crying when I drain your bank account.” You turn to continue shopping, being more liberal in your choosing. And where do you put all the books you pick up? Right in Miles’ hand.
He chuckles at your response and carries the mounting books with ease, “Trust, you won’t hear a peep outta me.”
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Taglist & Masterlist & Reqs Info
Reqs are open!!
A/N: Thanks so much for 1K notes guys!! 😊😊
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writteninlunarlight-years · 4 months ago
Note
Hazbin men doing makeup with reader. Doing eachothers makeup !!!
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Lucifer
He loves it when you do his makeup. Your creativity is so impressive to him, and it's like he is your own little art canvas. This is something he prides himself on.
He would learn what you do step by step, but things relate poorly in his mind, so he calls everything the wrong terms. Nothing is funnier than him telling others that you beat his face, though.
He eventually picks up on things like skincare and primers, so he starts using those on his own, even if you aren't doing his makeup that day.
When you ask if he wants to take a stab at your makeup, he declines at first. He is terrified of messing up and you being mad at him.
As you offer and ask, he will slowly do one or two things. Start off small, like applying your foundation or primers. Then, move up to something more prominent, like lipstick and eyeliners.
He finds it an excellent bonding activity, like when you two preen his feathers.
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Alastor
He does not want your makeup touching his face; his one compact of blackish-red eyeshadow and eyeliner is plenty.
However, your pleading face is adorable and makes him weak, more than he cares to admit. So he will eventually cave in to let you do his routine with him.
Eventually, he will let you get away with sneaking in your own routines and items, like sunscreen, primers, and concealer. He must admit you do a swell job.
When you offer to let him do your face, he is apprehensive. Not only does he not want to mess up, but you have so many steps. He just does the two and is done.
He will learn for you, though, and personally really enjoys putting your mascara on. Gives him an excuse to look at your pretty eyes from up above.
He enjoys the domestication of it all, but please don't talk about it outside of your shared room or else.
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Angel Dust
He asked you to do his makeup in the first place. He loves the idea of you two getting dolled up together.
He even went out of his way to buy high-end makeup for you that the makeup artists at the studio use.
He wants you two to be stunning and ready to catch anyone's eyes, only to break hearts when they realize you are together.
He loves to do your makeup more, though, because you have such a cute face, and being up close and personal makes him really happy.
He teaches you how to cover dark circles and bruises; he hopes the only bruises you will ever get are from him marking you, but if that's not the case, he wants you to be prepared.
This is his favorite activity, especially if there is gossip or drama he wants to air with you.
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Husk
He isn't really a fan, but he will bend over backward to see you happy, so he will cave in eventually.
Expect complaints, but mostly, he will just be silently watching you do your best work. It always surprises him how you have such a keen eye for color and style.
He likes to make stinky comments like, 'This isn't gonna change this ugly mug doll,' you just need to swat those nasty comments away with your own sweet, lovely comments.
When you offer him to try on you, he is adamant that he will just mess it up and enjoys watching you do your makeup far more than when he is doing it.
If he ever does get brave enough to help you with your makeup, he will mostly do your lipstick; he likes coloring in your lips and kissing you to 'blot the excess love.'
He enjoys watching you do this; it's ASMR for him. However, don't expect him to be super giddy about himself being the canvas.
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Vox
Personally, I see Vox as the least okay with you doing makeup on him for a few reasons. He is mainly set in his ways from when he died, but he is also a screen and thinks it's a waste to put your hard-earned money on his face.
He will let you do it on rare occasions when you are really sad and need a pick-me-up, though. Yet he openly states he will buy you new makeup. It's wasted on him.
He uses you doing his makeup as an excuse for you to sit on his lap since he can hold you close.
If you ask him to do your makeup, he obliges just cause he knows it upsets you when he turns you down on doing makeup.
His favorite part is the foundation cause he likes that your beauty blenders come in many fun shapes and colors.
It's a few and far between passions, but when you can get him to commit to helping you with makeup, he is a trooper and does it all for you.
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Adam
He is the most secretive about how he really wants to do your makeup, and if that means you doing his fine, so be it.
He watches you like a cat does string when you are doing your entire face.
He thinks it is astonishing that you can be a million different people depending on how you do the makeup that day.
He will probably ask you to do silly makeup on him, like giving him fuller facial hair or using gold eyeshadow and nothing else.
He is so goofy about doing your makeup that he does not try to follow your guidelines at all. He just likes having fun. Sometimes, though, he does make a banger color combination.
This is a fun secret activity you two do in the privacy of his office or home, something to keep you two close and bonded even in uncertain times.
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thecuriousbeauty · 4 months ago
Text
Traitor-The Present
Chapter 1
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Synopsis:y/n is a hard working painter, trying to make the ends meet. She lives with and takes care of her sick Uncle, the only one she has for a family. She has dreams to make it big, and when the desperation for money strikes, she has to make a choice. Walk away after listening to an incredible deal that would fix all her problems, or take up the deal. A top secret, risky deal, which involves meeting Harry Styles.A man once rumored to be a dangerous secret weapon of a leading mafia. artist!y/n x mafia!harry (he's also a doctor)
Word Count: 3601
Author's note: This chapter is just a start to what I hope will be a very interesting thriller. This is my fan first fiction, but I've made sure that it's all planned out properly for you guys. Warnings will be mentioned at the beginning of every chapter. Please re blog to support me if you like it! Next chapter will be up very soon:)
Warnings: Talks about mafia, gold smuggling, accident.
___________________________________________
"Ms. y/l/n, this is the second time I'm calling you, I'm afraid I cannot wait longer. I may have to-"
y/n closes her eyes, bringing her index and thumb finger to squeeze at the skin of the bridge of her nose. "No, no! Mr. Timothy please give me some time, I promise I'll send everything I owe you, just give me some time."
She was due on her rent on the little place she and her uncle call as home.
"I can't give you any more time, Miss. By tomorrow 8 pm, or I'll have you evicted.", Mr. Timothy told her on the phone. 
"Yes, um thank you." y/n sighs as she keeps her phone on the table, and looks around at the mess of her living room. It was a small flat, with a decent living room, a comfortable couch, a TV where her uncle usually spends away the day when she's out working, and two bedrooms. 
Her phone beeped, with an alarm to make sure her uncle took her medicines, and she walked to his bedroom. He was resting on the bed, back supported by a pillow as he read a book. He loves books on underworld mysteries and mafias. She never gets it. 
"Uncle Luke, it's time for your meds.", she says. 
From the time she remembers, y/n was raised by her uncle. She doesn't remember having a father, or a mother, she only has her Uncle Luke to call as family. Whenever she asked him about her family, he would stroke her hair and tell her that no one realized how special she was.
She loved her uncle, he was her father figure. Uncle Luke got diagnosed with Alzheimer's a few months back, and he had to retire from his job as a librarian. Sometimes, he appears completely normal. y/n's heart breaks when she sees the painful expression on her uncle's face as he tries to remember something that shouldn't have been that difficult to remember.
"I took them.", her uncle smiles at her, lifting his eyes from the book. "Are you okay? You seem stressed."
She smiles for his sake, nodding. "Just tired. You need anything?"
Uncle Luke shakes his head, before taking her hand. "Is it money? I can help you out, go back to my job-"
"-No, Uncle Luke, I got it.", y/n squeezes his hand. "I just need you to rest up and be okay. I'm gonna try and squeeze in another job, I'll work something out. I've gotta go now."
Uncle Luke nods, gently ruffling her hair. "Off you go, y/n."
"See you in the evening!"
y/n rushes out the door, and takes the train to the cafe. She doesn't work as a barista, the cafe wanted someone to paint beautiful pictures on the canvas while their customers enjoyed their service. The Golden Cup cafe was a beautiful place. Covered with greenery, sweet smelling flowers and little tables around. 
y/n set up her canvas, paints and brushes. "Morning.", her best friend Sania nudges her elbow. Sania works as a server in the same cafe, and they have been best friends since the first day they met.
"Good morning. It's not good though, I hope yours was good.", y/n rambles, stressed about her desperate need for money.
"Woah, what happened?", Sania asks watching her mix a few colors onto her palate. y/n tells her about the rent problems, and Sania nods understandingly. She also had her debt issues, but recently, she was doing well. y/n thought her rough patch would also be over soon, but she had no hope now. 
"I can set you up an appointment with the people I was talking about.", Sania tells her, and it gains her attention. "They can help you."
"I don't want to do anything illegal Sania-"
"-No, it's not illegal. It's off charts, but you're gonna get money in exchange for a task they assign you. It's simple!"
"That task may involve illegal activities.", y/n shakes her head. Last thing she needed was to go to jail, leaving her uncle all alone.
"No, it won't. Come on y/n, they helped me.", Sania smiles at another coworker, and lowers her voice. "You don't even have to agree immediately, you can decide and get back to them. This job isn't going to be enough to make ends meet and you know that. Think about it."
"Sania take table 4 please!"
"Yes.", Sania nodded at y/n. "I have to get back to work."
y/n also had to get to work, she smiled at the customers before putting her brush to the canvas. She doesn't decide on what to paint. She just lets the inspiration take over. The customers watched in awe as her hand moved skillfully, without an effort. y/n didn't think about her problems when she painted. When she painted, she was in her own world where everything was alright. That was why her paintings all turned out extraordinary.
She talked to the customers who came up to her. During her break, she sat with her cold mint lemon tea and thought about everything Sania said. She was right, she needed the money. Just talking with them wouldn't hurt would it? 
She approached Sania later on that day. "I'll um, I'll talk to them."
"Good! I'll set you up a meeting tonight.", Sania smiled and gave her a side hug. "The choice will be yours babe, to take up the offer or not."
y/n looks around nervously as Sania leads her through an alleyway. It was a sketchy place. There were no people around. 
"Are you sure this is the right place?", y/n whispers.
"Yes.", Sania holds her hand. "They like to be discreet."
"Why? Because of their illegal businesses?"
"Stel. I don't know if they have illegal businesses or not, but they won't involve you in anything like that. There, that's the building. Third floor."
"You're not coming with me?", y/n asks as she stares up at the tall building. It looked musty and old. Much like a haunted house.
"No, but I'll wait for you in the car, okay?", Sania says and y/n sighs, wondering if this was a bad idea. "You'll be fine.", Sania assures.
y/n nods, and goes inside the building. She took the elevator, and waited until it got to the third floor. The building didn't look as bad inside.  
"y/n, y/l/n?", a man asks. He was tall, clad in a black shirt and black pants. He had an AirPod in his right ear, an expensive watch on his left arm. 
"Yes.", y/n answers and the man nods, before walking towards the end of the hallway. y/n assumed she was supposed to follow him so she did. They stopped at a room, and he opened it, stepping aside for her to enter. "Please."
The door closed behind her as she entered the room. She noticed the velvety purple couch in the middle of the room, where a bold looking woman sat. Neat white blouse tucked into dark red pants, along with red heels and red lipstick coating her lips made her look like the boss. She was the only one sitting, the other two men were leaning against a table, and the other was looking outside the window, not paying attention to her. They wore similar clothes to the man who brought her here.
The woman looks her down, her dark brown eyes trying to stare into her soul. Her short hair was sleeked back. 
"Miss y/l/n, please take a seat.", she gave her a smile, but y/n knew it wasn't a warm smile, it was more like a challenging smile. 
"Thanks." y/n sits on the chair in front of the woman. "I am Romania Pelt, nice to meet you.", the woman said, no shake of hands. 
"I guess you already know my name.", y/n replies nervously.
"Come on Hans, where are your manners? Ask our guest if she'd like something to drink.", Romania looks at the man leaning on the table and staring at y/n.
"Anything to drink?", he promptly asks.
"Um, mint lemon ice tea?", y/n blurts out nervously, and the man smirks in amusement, before turning around and fixing her a water. "Water will do too, thank you.", y/n takes a sip, and keeps the water on the table, before keeping her hands on her lap. 
"So Miss y/l/n, we know about the trouble you're in and we want to help you out.", Romania tells her.
"If you want to help me out, I have to do something for you. Let me tell you, I will not take part in anything involving illegal issues like drug dealing, or sexual favors for anyone.", y/n put it out.
"Okay.", Romania nods. "Anything else?"
"You know illegal includes dealing with unauthorized guns, stealing, trespassing-"
"We're aware what illegal covers.", Romania cuts her off, and the man chuckles like she was funny. "You're right about doing us a favor. Let me tell you about it."
y/n nods. "We have a big business, all around the world. We do a lot of things, which involves a lot of side operations.", Romania said in a way y/n wouldn't know what the things were. "But now we're at a little bit of a loss."
"I um can't help you with business.", y/n murmurs.
"I know. But you can help us bring back our main player."
y/n raises an eyebrow as Romania continued. "He was our leader. He was the best at everything. Masterplans, hacking, leading our opponents into traps. He was mainly in charge of the gold smuggling. One night when he was travelling with the gold along with his partner, something happened between them. All we know is that there was a blast, and his partner died. The gold was gone too."
"He didn't die?", y/n asked.
"No.", Romania smiled. "Harry Styles does not go down easily."
Harry Styles. y/n liked the story but she didn't like what she was going to hear. "In the blast, Harry suffered a severe head injury. He was in a coma for a while, but he came back. Unfortunately, he doesn't remember anything that happened.", Romania said. "He has forgotten everything about his past life. We know it must have scared him deeply, losing his partner. She was his lover. Reagan Jones. She was the only one in our unit who was just as good as Harry. They both were literally, a power couple."
y/n felt bad for the guy. "When Reagan died, Harry permanently lost a piece of him too. Not a small piece. A large part of his past life."
"W-What's he doing now?", y/n asks.
"He is a doctor.", Romania says. "Only we knew him as who he was. On the outside he maintained an image as our Doctor. He remembers about being a doctor, so that's how he's leading a living now. Everyone knew about Reagen and not to mess with her, but Harry was our secret weapon, and we need him back. We've given him enough time to sulk about Reagen. It was unfortunate, and we all hate that we lost her but we need Harry back in his bearings."
"What do you want me to do about that?", y/n asks confused.
"You need to befriend him.", Romania says. "Talk to him, get to know him. We heard from Sania that you love talking, and you're great with customers. So do your thing. Eventually, we need you to ask him about what happened that night, what really went wrong, where is the gold?"
"You just said he doesn't remember."
Romania and Hans smile, even the man who was looking outside the window up until now and ignoring y/n, now turns around. "You are going to make him remember.", he said in his gruff voice.
"I'm not a brain surgeon!", y/n scoffed out a laugh. Who do these people think she is?
"We think Harry remembers everything. But he is putting on a show, a mask, to hide whatever he knows. He knows something huge, that's why he does not want to come back to his old life. We need to crack his shell somehow. We've all tried y/n, but someone like you is who we need. Do whatever you need to do, but please, you have to make him remember." Romania had a desperation to her voice now. "Oliver, please."
The bearded gruff man Oliver, pulls out a wad of cash. "Thirty thousand dollars, you can take this now, if you accept our deal."
y/n's eyes widens at the cash. "It's not black, it's real money.", Romania assures. "And on completion of the task, we will give you the rest. Five hundred thousand dollars in total."
"W-Why would you pay me so much?"
"Because this is important to us. We need Harry back.", Oliver says slowly. "I need my best friend back."
Hans pats his arm like he was offering the man comfort. "You'll have to report to me weekly, and you get four weeks to make him remember.", Romania says.
"Four weeks?!", y/n was surprised. How can she make a man remember things he doesn't want to remember in four weeks?
"You can do it.", Romania tells her. "Let me show you his picture. Hans?"
Hans nodded and handed y/n a photo. "That's him. The most wanted man. By now, our opponents also know about Harry. They knew Reagan alone couldn't carry off what she did. So Harry has a lot of people wishing him dead. They don't want to risk him remembering and going back to the person he was."
y/n looked at the photo of the man as the thoughts ran in her mind. A man who lost his lover, and lost his memory. Now he's living without knowing that he is a live target for the big thugs. He was handsome, y/n thought. Luscious brown hair, styled neatly, a little and his green eyes were so deep, like they held a forest inside them. This was the person she was supposed to befriend.
"You can take your time to think about it, give me a call by tomorrow.", Romania slides her card over to y/n. "Nice talking to you, Miss y/l/n."
"I'll escort you outside.", Hans says, and y/n understand that they're done talking to her.
_____________________________________________________________
"Well he's a handsome man, Reagan must have been lucky.", Uncle Luke says as y/n shows him the photo of Harry and tells him the story. y/n shared everything with Uncle Luke. Sania was her best friend, but she still didn't share some things with her that she would with Uncle Luke. 
"Well she's dead.", y/n mumbles. "What do you think?"
"This man must be important.", Uncle Luke says, and y/n nods. "If they're willing to pay so much just in return for his memory."
"What if he doesn't want to remember Uncle Luke?", y/n asks softly. "Reagen died. That must have scarred him deeply. Maybe there's something more to it. Maybe someone attacked them and he couldn't save her. He must be in pain, that's why his mind is shutting it all off."
"Don't get personal, darling.", Uncle Luke advises. "We don't know what kind of a man Harry was, so don't feel for him. Your job is just to befriend him and make him remember."
"I'm too curious to let this go now.", y/n says. "I only read about mafias in novels! I told Sania they were real."
"Mafia?", Uncle Luke laughs. "You confirmed they're mafia?"
"Of course. Business, she said. So secretive! You had to see the building and all the men.", y/n laughs too. "You're right, I won't get personal. I just need the money. Maybe we can get out of this town sooner than we thought, Uncle Luke."
Her uncle smiles, patting her hand as he closes her eyes. "Reena said she'll come over for dinner."
y/n's smile freezes as she hears that. Reena was Uncle Luke's daughter, she had died in a fire. She hates when the disease does this. Uncle Luke had early onset Alzheimer's, so it wasn't as bad as him not being able to recognize her. But she still hated it. 
"I'll make her favorite pasta.", y/n whispers, fluffing his pillow. "You get some rest, Uncle Luke. I love you."
She had to get him the best care. He took care of her all her life. She took the card, and called Romania.
"Miss y/l/n, good to hear from you.", Romania's voice says.
"I'll do it.", y/n said before she could change her mind. "I'll bring his memories back."
___________________________________________
She decided to go with the classic method of meeting first. Go out for drinks. y/n wasn't a big drinker, most of the time. She wasn't going to drink too much today, she wanted to be sober enough to remember everything she got out of the man. 
Romania sent her the details of the hospital in which Harry worked, and told her that he goes to the bar down the street after his working hours sometimes. y/n hoped this would be one day like that, as she set out to the bar. y/n wore a chrome yellow fluffy, silky top along with her jeans and heels. She let her hair out. 
She looked around the bar as she entered, not spotting her target. She decided to wait.
"What would you like, ma'am? New here?", the bartender smiles at her. 
"Uh yes, first time here." She skims through the names of the drinks. 
"First drink on the house. I'll get you our special cocktail?", he asks.
"Okay!" 
Anything on the house sounded amazing.
"I'll be right back.", he winks at her and goes away. y/n turned on her chair to continue scanning the crowd. The bartender was cute, but she had stuff to do.
Her drink came faster than Harry, and she was disappointed he wouldn't come to the bar that night when she finally saw him.
The photo didn't do justice. Harry Styles stood tall, six feet two at least, she thought. His stubble had grown out, and his hair had curls peeking out. Sharp cheekbones that could slice through skin and strong shoulders that hid beneath his light blue shirt. 
He appeared stressed as he ran a hand through his hair, and sat on the empty chair a few seats away from her. "Usual.", he nodded at the bartender, who got to making his drink right away. y/n watched him roll his shirt sleeves back, and sit with his head on his hands. He must have had a rough day.
Then he lifted his head up suddenly and looked straight at her, like he knew she had been watching him. Their eyes connected for a second, before he looked away. 
y/n felt a shiver up her spine. 
That was close, y/n breathed as she sipped the concoction. 
She waited until he had drowned a drink, of what looked like whiskey, before she made her move. 
She gave him her best smile as she took the seat next to him. "Hi, rough day?"
He didn't spare her a look, but he grunted in reply.
Very polite.
"I had a rough day too.", y/n goes on. "Being an artist isn't easy. Sometimes it's hard to get into the creative head space. I had some decisions to make today, and that interfered with my work."
"Artist?", his voice was smooth and deep.
"Yes. I paint.", she answers. "What do you do?"
"ER Doctor.", he looks at her with those eyes looking like they were brimming a storm behind them. "I like art."
"You do? You should come to the cafe sometime, then.", y/n says, treading on careful steps. 
"I don't get time to take a stroll into a cafe.", Harry scoffs, taking a big gulp of his drink. 
"Your job is difficult.", y/n agrees. "Do you like being a doctor?"
Harry tilts his head to study her. "Yes."
y/n waited for him to say something more, but he didn't. Great. He does love talking.
"What do you like about art?", she asks. That, she could talk about.
"The colors.", he answers, looking away from her again. "They have a hidden meaning, most of the time. The artist might not even have an idea when they start, but it turns out beautiful when they're done. Like they gave life to it."
That was the most he had told her since they started talking, and Stella smiled at his description. "I have a small studio too, you should stop by when you have time, Doctor-"
"Turner.", he completes. "Harry Turner."
Either he changed his last name, or he doesn't remember. y/n offers her hand to shake. "y/n, y/l/n."
He nods, and she feels the rough callouses of his fingers as it brushes hers. His hand was warm, and she liked the feel of it on hers. It made her feel safe. Why did it make her feel like that? Why did she feel like it was a familiar hand?
Chapter Two
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cats-artbag · 7 months ago
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SwapOut/Webcomic/Twitch PSA!
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Hi everyone 👋🏻 Zk here >< or Cats, for older followers
So I've been getting back into doing SwapOut again, but I would like to appeal to everyone who reads and loves the comic. Much love to all of you who's still sticking around 🙏🏻💙 But something has also always been bothering me throughout this journey.
As many of us know, we artists do these comics for free (especially fan comics), starting them out of love and taking a LOT of time and energy out of our lives to continue making them.
And it's amazing how many of you come from translations or comic dubs on Youtube, which are also very well-done and take a lot of effort to make, much love to them too. There is a difference, however.
Monetization.
And I'm not asking for pity! I'm appealing for understanding.
Because some comic dubbers on Youtube are able to earn ad revenue from the videos they upload. From the beginning, we artists have given them the permission to dub our works. But we don't receive anything from it, nor do we usually charge them for using our art (against our better judgement).
We let them use our comic pages in their monetized videos for free. And occasionally these videos receive thousands and millions of views, which I imagine gives a decent amount of ad revenue, while the artists themselves don't usually earn anything from their own artwork, nor do we ever want to put it behind a paywall of any kind. (we like reading free comics too so don't worry x|)
... But doing full-colored comic pages for free eventually gets hard to sustain without any income from it, even more so when we need to give our time and energy to other jobs to earn money for a living instead. We legitimately keep going on our comics purely out of love. Truly, we would LOVE to do our own art for a living. There's things like Patreon but it's only feasible if we're also able to produce bonus content or show BTS, and only people willing to spend money for them can help us, and not readers who aren't able to.
And we understand that not everyone can afford to support us monetarily. And that's okay!
But if you love these comics and want to really help us to keep going, there ARE ways you can easily support us for free!
For example, affiliates on Twitch (like myself) are able to earn ad revenue very early on (they must have at least 50 followers, quite a requirement, but still easier to obtain than Youtube's 1000 subscribers).
(my Youtube, btw. not much rn but drop a subscribe?)
But simply put, if the vast majority of readers from the yt numbers visit and stay for ads on the artists' Twitch streams (remember to have adblocker disabled for the site, if any), they'll be making an actual, physical contribution to the artist themselves, at no cost whatsoever. We earn up to 55% from any ads that run on our stream, so the more viewers, the better!
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(this is my twitch on average 8 viewers, with a 3 hour stream. again, the more the better!)
(ofc you can also buy subs to watch ad-free and supports me directly, but i'm typing all this to share the free ways people can support their fave creators ✨)
And even if that doesn't work out, I'd be happy enough to see most of you there 🙏🏻💙 I've been treating my streams as work, so I'm striving not to break the streak.
So drop a follow on my Twitch, and catch the streams when you can! They're great if you need company or background noise, and also great for co-working~
Currently streaming WEEKLY, Mondays, Wednesdays (SwapOut) and Saturdays, 10.30AM EST
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(art by @cupcakepaints)
>> twitch.tv/zkcats <<
Anyway thanks for listening to my Ted talk, please share this around for others as well >< 🙏🏻 Artists, make this a reblog chain or something! Promo your stuff!
And apologies for the essay, I wasn't expecting to type this much sdghsgh this itself is not an ad for Twitch or whatev, I'm just a little frustrated with needing to juggle all this.
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I was also considering hosting SwapOut somewhere that could get ad revenue, but I wasn't sure where until I realized I can probably earn that from my Tapas now (i think?? sdfhgh up to 70% ad revenue there but i haven't seen any yet) So maybe I'll post there a day earlier than here or something? We'll see. Go subscribe there! Check it out! Reread it! Help ME help YOU!
... Much appreciated ><
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bekolxeram · 6 days ago
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I know there's been plenty of "Lou gets me in the divorce" posts already. Like this one by @peppermintquartz. But I want to write my own for maximum reach.
I don't really follow actors. If they do a good job on screen, I watch it, that's it. I don't dig through their social media to find out more stuff about their personal life. That actually makes me uncomfortable. I spent a good amount of my life dodging questions about my private life anyway.
Now, the Cameo thing. I don't know what shows you're all watching, but I've been a Star Trek fan for years. Plenty of old Star Trek actors do Cameo right now, because this hyper-capitalistic society doesn't reward artistic ventures accordingly. Hollywood is always about what makes the most money, not about what's the best story to tell. Cameo is a lifeline for many seriously talented actors who don't have the luck to become a breakout star. It's not just a fantasy making your Ken dolls kiss, there are real people doing their jobs for salary behind the scene.
You have to choose one between "Lou is a nepo baby who has his career mapped out for him" and "Lou is trying to cling onto relavency because he needs the money". Tell me you think a restaurant waiter being a sweetheart for extra tip is exploitative, then I'll know who you actually are. Most celebrities on Cameo don't even respond to the $5 messages, they don't make a lot from it after service fees, and it's not refundable anyway, but Lou did reply, because he's grateful for our support.
Then, I know people have been digging up posts from his past to frame him as this unforgivable bigot. Obviously I don't know him personally, but just by reading interview from the cast, he has the most "character growth" in and out of universe. People apologize all the time, out of obligation, due to backlash, but it's not always from a place of true understanding. Yeah, Lou has never apologized for the things he posted over a decade ago, before he was even a public figure, but he also expressed the struggle he experienced in the athletic world and under the influence of his father, how he came out of his trauma stronger and healthier mentally.
I still presume celebrities to be assholes, until proven otherwise. They're simply flying too high up from earth. In this whole fiasco though, Lou is the only one who's shown a shred of care.
I take people for who they are right now. That doesn't mean I absolve them of their past mistakes automatically. I just judge people as they come. If they're clearly not their past self anymore, if they speak of regret from the past, yeah, I'll give you some leeway. But if you tell me I should boohoo get over it, I'll take you for who you are right now. I'll believe you the first time around.
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rachelamberprice · 27 days ago
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i’m an amberprice before all, but chloe is one of my favorite characters of all time and i think the way they wrote the pricefield break up (and really the fact it exists at all, narratively) is ooc. chloe’s arc in lis1 shows she becomes very attached and fiercely loyal to her loved ones. to a degree most people just wouldn’t go. it would take military grade equipment to remove her from william, rachel, max and even joyce. the reason why she even offers to sacrifice herself also hinges upon that loyalty, hence how she brings up not wanting her mom to die. but she also knows the trauma max has gone through (that’s like life ruining trauma) to try and save her and she loves her for that in ways you couldn’t put into words
i agree with michel on this one
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but even he conceded that it shouldn’t have happened, narratively
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but anyway, to tack onto this, something about deck nine that really frustrates me is the way they sort of break life is strange down into these marketable “components”. you can see this both in the ads for the game and the game’s writing itself. they’re like “look, it’s a small town and a murder mystery! that’s what you want, right? look, some independent music! that’s the same thing, right?” and even their love interests feel phoned in/shallow that way. life is strange 1 (and even before the storm, which is theirs) didn’t have these marketable love interests that were commodified more or less. they just had organic characters that were organic to the story — max, chloe, rachel. none of them were there to be love interests specifically. they were there to tell the story that the creators had a lot of artistic passion/inspiration to tell. the indie music wasn’t chosen just to be novel and hipster, it was carefully chosen to tell the player even more things about the scene or its characters. “To All Of You” was commentary on how poorly female characters are written in american media and how they aren’t allowed their own complex emotions and portrayals because they’re dainty archetypes usually. the entire game flies in the face of that issue by showing us a cast of women who are more than just their traumas and the abuse they suffer to the men in the game. they’re allowed to be imperfect, angry, multi-faceted
then you have “Santa Monica Dream” which set the tone for what chloe had lost in her relationship with rachel. i mean, there’s so many examples
there was sooo much passion that went into crafting that game and none of it was like “oh, we’re checking boxes to please the publisher and market the game”. to be fair, the game was made first and then shopped to publishers. but even with LiS2, it had the same love and genuine care instead of just… marketable pieces forced in
and i don’t fault the devs for being forced to do some of this under square’s thumb and complying to do everything they can to keep the IP because they want to have jobs. how can i fault people just trying to feed their family and live? and even when corporate/capitalist shit has been ruining the lives of devs in the industry forever now, they’ve always asked us to keep buying and supporting games anyway because they don’t want to lose their livelihoods. they would suffer, not the higher ups at square. but the issue is complex. because at some point the product isn’t being made with a desire to make art anymore, and it’s also not being made with over 60% of the audience in mind… and a lot of us are poor or struggling too and don’t have the money to waste. so then we don’t support the game, fine. but it’s like… no one is winning here? the devs aren’t winning because they’re closer to losing the IP because fans are let down (and arguably kind of lied to in marketing), square is making less money as pre orders are canceled, fans are just getting these games without love/passion that are made under extreme stress because the workers are in awful conditions. no one is winning here. something has to give and if that means it’s voting with our wallets then…? i guess that’s what it comes to, right?
the game industry is less about art now and more about appeasing these rich people that are making demands and that sucks for everyone involved. it’s predatory on the devs and the fans. and this is without talking about the nazi the studio had employed. not even sure if he’s been let go yet. not that that’s the fault of the other people who are having to suffer working alongside him (and HR is usually corrupt in games anyway) but it’s still something to really consider when supporting a studio?
but anyway, my main point with this post was just to analyze the way deck nine’s LiS games have now turned into this “hit the check boxes, give them the murder mystery, manufactured love interest, music, etc” and to me that’s making the games worse than anything else. even the pricefield debacle aside
because at least before the storm felt like a story being told to tell the story and not like a “hey here’s a murder mystery with love interest 1 and 2”, which started happening with true colors
maybe this is like a melodramatic take though, idk. i mean, i love before the storm so it’s clear to me there’s people in D9 (or there were) that do care about the original story/world of LiS1 and want to make art. even if there are also some losers in the mix (the nazi… 😭) maybe there are some really redeemable things in double exposure that make it worth playing and also just worth more than the sum of its bad marketing and flaws. i didn’t like true colors much because it felt hollow a lot of the time (and rushed?) but yeah
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ender-girl-13 · 10 months ago
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Thoughts on Palworld
Leave it to the internet to miss the entire point of people disliking Palworld. It's not because they are taking money from Pokémon. It not because they think Pokémon but with guns is stupid. IT'S ABOUT ARTISTIC INTEGRITY AND ORIGINALITY! Some of the Pals are just blatant rip-off's/fusions of existing Pokémon. If people try to steal Pokémon's designs and actually sell that as a commercial product that may give the impression that it's ok to steal others art and encourage it! If all of the Pals they made were original I would love to play it!
P.S
Apparently the accusations of them ripping Pokémon models was false. (Sorry about that) But they did basically do the 3D modeling version of tracing which is still bad. Also I've watched more videos on this game and it is very POSSIBLE they have stolen fan Fakemon designs and changed them up a little which is still shitty of them.
Again I will reiterate I would love this game and it's success if it wasn't so creatively bankrupt and plagiarized.
Here are some alternative Pokémon-esce games to play!
Cassette Beasts - Try to find you way out of this land and transform into and fuse Beasts!
TemTem - Very cute art style and can play online with other people! Also has a Nuzlocke/Randomlocke Mode.
Ooblets - Have card dance battles with other Ooblets and have them help you on your farm. You can also run your own shop!
Coromon - You're a newly minted Battle Researcher and your job gets attacked on your first day of work! Track down the invaders and discover the rising threat around Velua! Has different difficultly modes and customization.
Monster Sanctuary - A Monster Taming Metroidvania Sidescroller
Here are some Pokémon fan games to try!
Reborn - Has decent difficulty/One of the most difficult fan games I've come across. Has new Pokémon Forms
Uranium - Original Region and Pokémon
Insurgence - Has an option for a slightly darker twist on the traditional Pokémon story. Has new Pokémon/Forms
Xenoverse - Haven't play or watched it but looks very promising. Originally in Spanish but has a English translation as well.
Phoenix Rising - Still in development and only has one episode. Has new Pokémon Forms and amazing art and visuals
Red Adventures - From what I've seen it seems to be a game version of The Pokémon Adventures Manga
Castaway - Your plane crashes and you are left to discover the secrets of a mysterious island.
Mewyou - A game where you play as Mew!
Axis - You are teleported from our world to the Pokémon world/You're still human
Ethereal Gates - Still only a Demo at the moment/Unsure if they are still making it
I will add more to this list if asked!
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pawnshopbleus · 9 months ago
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Miller's Girl - Part One
Professor!Joel Miller x Fem!College Student!Reader Very Loosely based off of the new movie, Miller's Girl, starring Jenna Ortega and Martin Freeman
Summary - Your landlord decides to raise the rent in your studio apartment the day you are fired from your job. In need of money, you sign up for a babysitting service your friend suggested. You didn’t expect to get an offer so quickly, and you also didn’t expect to come from your professor.
Series contains - cursing, mature language, teacher x student relationship, age gap, smut, fluff, angst, non beta read chapters and everything else I forgot to mention
College, no outbreak, and modern AU
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The record store in downtown Austin was filled to the brim with people excited to have their items signed by their favorite band. The crowd was a mix of teen girls with their dads and middle-aged men on their lonesome. The band in question was some underground band from the eighties that you had never heard of. 
Your co-worker, Emma, was in charge of keeping the crowd in check while you were manning the register. This wasn’t the first time you had done these signings. In the two years that you have worked here, hundreds of artists have come in and out of those doors. They attract their loyal fans to the store which can give it more publicity and customers. 
Your eyes scan the crowd. It was still pretty full, but the line had stopped trickling out of the doors and onto the sidewalk. You look over at Emma to see her standing with her weight on her left hip and her arms crossed. If you didn’t know her, you would have thought she looked like a bitch, but in all actuality, she is the nicest girl you know. 
The doors open and the bell above it rings. Your boss comes in and surveys the store. His bald head nods as he skims it. Nothing had been stolen and the customers looked happy. When his eyes land on you, your heart drops. You know that look. It was the same look he gave your other co-worker that look right before he fired him. You cross your fingers under the counter and plaster a fake smile on your face. 
Your entire world looks like it’s in slow motion. Your boss steps closer. Each step he takes makes your heart thump in your chest. The sound his thousand-dollar shoes make on the floor sounds like the bombs used on the battlefield. 
You don’t know if you either blacked out or passed out, but the next thing you knew, you were in the staff room gathering your things. This would be the last time you would ever step foot in this record store as an employee, but that should have been the least of your worries. You needed this job. Without it, you won’t be able to afford rent. Luckily, you were smart enough to get a full-ride scholarship for the university you attended, but there were still other expenses that needed to be paid. 
The hallway of your apartment building seemed colder than it usually is. The usual shushing of dogs who aren’t supposed to be in the apartment is replaced with static. The crickets weren’t even chirping. The sound of your breathing brought you out of your tiny rut. At least you were still alive.
The pink paper in front of your door made you stop in your tracks. You could read what it said from where you stood. ‘Rent will be increased to a thousand dollars a month’ was typed out in Times New Roman. Only pretentious bitches type in Times New Roman. 
You were sure that this was the work of the couple that bought the building six months ago. They promised the residents who lived there that the rent would stay the same, but the promise had just been broken. You were worried for yourself, sure, but you were also worried about the elderly people who couldn’t afford to go anywhere else. 
You wish nothing but the worst for the new landlords and make your way into your studio apartment. It’s a mess, just the way you left it this morning. Your cat, Bill, lays outstretched on your couch as if he were the one who just worked eight hours only to get fired at the end of it. 
You flop on your couch and sigh. For the first time in a while, you don’t know what to do. You just got fired and your rent got increased. If you can’t pay rent then you’ll become another homeless college student. Just another statistic to the state and a burden to the university. 
Your phone chimes and you almost cry with joy as you see your best friend’s caller ID flash across the screen. 
You pick up the phone and she begins talking immediately. She goes on and on about some boy she saw a the mall. He had icy blonde hair, but his roots were showing which meant that he wasn’t a natural blonde. This was a good distraction for about a few minutes until you realized that you wouldn’t be able to afford to go to the mall anymore. 
Your hot tears dribbled down your cheeks and fell onto your chest. 
“Are you okay?” 
“Cherry, I just got fired from my fucking job because my boss wants to buy more fucking shoes and my rent just got fucking increased because my landlords are fucking bastards!” You say through tears. “I think I just heard you say ‘fucking’ in that one sentence more times than I have heard you say it in your entire life,” Cherry laughs. 
“It’s not funny, Cherry. I'm going to be homeless!”
“Stop being dramatic. Sign up for flowers for one dot com. It’s a babysitting website where single parents find a babysitter for their children. My cousin did it for about a year and made more money than she does at her regular job.” 
For the first time in a very long time, Cherry gave you actual good advice. She gave you a solution to all of your problems. 
“Thanks, Cher, bye.” You hang up before Cherry has a chance to say goodbye. 
Your phone drops onto the couch and bounces off, falling on the floor. You suck in air through your teeth and grab your phone off the floor. You should be more gentle with it because you can’t afford to get a new one if it breaks. 
Flowers for one dot com was a simple website. It got straight to the point. No fancy explanation of ‘who are we’ or ‘why do we do this.’  You include the fact that you are certified by the Red Cross in CPR and that you are a senior at The University of Texas at Austin. You also add that you are majoring in architecture and the fact that you want to become an interior designer. 
Your profile is up and running in an hour. You look over it again and close your laptop. Your life is falling apart piece by piece, but maybe you should clean up a bit. 
The dirty clothes that were being neglected in the corner of your room are now in your hamper. You can see the hardwood floor that you’ll be paying a thousand dollars a month for. 
Your phone chimes once again, but this time it’s an email from the website. You almost drop your phone again as you read who it’s from. 
Joel Miller, Professor of Architectural Studies at The University of Texas at Austin.
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I'm the pretentious bitch that writes in Times New Roman 🙋🏿‍♀️
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mamsieur · 1 year ago
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Evil Twin | Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Floyd!Reader
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Summary : Who would have guessed that sweet and discreet Bob had a twin sister who was his opposite ? Not the Dagger Squad, that's for sure.
TW : mention of past abuse, mention of abusive relationship, mention of alcohol, mention of sex, angst and fluff, angst with happy ending
Length : 6980 words
AN : Bob is the sweetest and I'm sure he's an overprotective brother.
posted on AO3 July 22, 2023
You were the quintessential of the pop-rock star.  You had a lot of problems with the press, both concerning your love life and the setbacks of your ex-band.
The first problem was that you were often seen leaving hotels with different partners : the press loved that you didn't settle down and always made a big deal out of it. You didn't really care, you knew the tabloids always twisted the truth just to sell more garbage. What bothered you was that your mom kept calling you about it, wondering why you couldn't be discreet and serious, have a normal job like your twin; the perfect little Robby, pride and joy of the family. He was in the navy, serving the country, and your father liked to remind you that Robert was doing something useful, something great. Yet, you didn't care what the public and your family thought of you. You just wanted to play your songs, have fun on stage and in the studio. It was your cop-out after some traumatic experiences you went through in high school.
As for your problems with the band, it was a different kettle of fish. 
You were the lead vocalist and guitarist. You loved being on stage, it made you feel powerful, in control. You were backed by three talented but lazy guys about your age. It was your agent's idea to put you in charge of them. And what a great idea. At first it was fun, you had a good time. But as time went by, their excesses slowed down your rise in the charts. And they wasted all their time, energy and money on the wrong things. Every day, the press had a scoop about them doing something illegal or immoral. The last one on their list was being seen exiting a bar with underage fans.
Those recent events forced your label to give you a choice; either the whole group was fired or you could continue as a solo artist; your producer and staff knew that you weren't really a troublemaker, so it was a once in a lifetime opportunity for you.  You didn't even hesitate to sign your new contract ; and that led to a new scandal in the press, creating false drama between you and your ex mates. But as much as you were determined to make a name for yourself, you also needed a break from all the “scandal” that was going on. You made a deal with your producer and new agent: you had one month to come up with at least two singles, while you could go anywhere you wanted to find inspiration and relax.
And what could be more relaxing than the seaside ? The beach, the sun, the salty air, the feeling of being in an eternal summer ? It was perfect. You booked your flight to San Diego and rented a small beach house on Airbnb.  What could possibly go wrong? 
Well, maybe running into your twin brother at the local bar.
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The Hard Deck seemed like a pretty chill place and the owner, Penny, was really nice. You spent some evenings there, trying to come up with some lyrics over a Coke.  She was curious and you were happy to share what you were working on, even though you hadn't made any progress. She had that reassuring aura, and talking with her was like talking to an old friend that you knew all your life. She was genuinely interested in what you had to share, and gave you some advice when she could. She also was curious to hear your voice and tried a few times to get you at the piano. You refused politely each time, feeling strangely shy.
It took you a week and a half to work up the courage to go to that piano.
The bar was rather empty, which was unusual for a Saturday night but made it easier for you to convince yourself that it was okay. You discreetly started to warm up your voice and started a version of Your Song - Penny confessed to you it was one of her favorite songs.
In a corner of the bar, by the pool table, a group of pilots were surprised to hear the piano playing at this hour. "Looks like someone stole your seat, Bradshaw," a tall blond man sneered.  "Looks like it, Seresin." Bradley raised an eyebrow and leaned over to see who had taken his place at the piano. The others gently urged him to join them; after all, he was the musician among the squad. He pretended to be annoyed by their request and joined you for the last chorus.  You were surprised, but smiled quietly and finished your "performance" with him. You made room for him on the little bench, and with a look of approval, you moved on to another song of his choice: Ain't no mountain higher .  The patrons of the bar, who had become more numerous, were delighted to have a private mini-concert. Some of them started to dance, others joined in singing. It was a fun experience.
After the end of the song, you smiled and shook the hand of your partner of a moment and let him enjoy the piano by himself. You made your way back to your stool and asked Penny for a glass of water. You felt a presence next to you and turned a little to see who was there. You easily guessed it was a navy man ; the uniform - talk about obvious -, the perfectly styled hair. You grinned at the tall blond man in front of you.
“So, does that pretty voice have a name ?” asked Jake with a smirk. You rolled your eyes at his flirtatious tone and his pushed Texan accent.  “Well yes actually, I’m-” “Y/N ?” You frowned, immediately recognizing the voice that had spoken your name. You easily spotted his surprised face among the other navy people that were close to you and Jake. "Robert?" "Don't tell me you're his girlfriend..." "What? No!" you shouted at the same time, making a few of the others giggle. "Gross!" you pretended to vomit. "She's my sister, Hangman," Bob sighed. "Twin sister, to be exact," you precised.
You couldn't help but giggle at the shocked looks on the faces of who you assumed were his colleagues. He was suddenly flooded with questions, and you enjoyed watching him turn redder and redder. Then they focused on you. "You two don't look alike at all," Reuben said, scanning you in detail. You rolled your eyes and smiled, leaning against your brother as you poked his side. "Robert took the height and brains, I took the charm and talent." 
Your brother sighed and ran his hand over his neck, slightly embarrassed. His teammates were happy to meet you, especially happy to annoy Bob, and Natasha seemed to realize something. "Your voice sounds familiar... I've heard it somewhere before... in a band, right?" " Nemesis ," you smiled and nodded, mentioning your old band, "but I'm solo now. Kept the stage name though." "Quite a few scandals with that band..." your twin mumbled.  You decided not to pay attention to him. Like your parents, Robert had never understood your career choice, arguing that you were brilliant at school and could have done anything else. Of course you were pretty intelligent but you had fallen in love with music as an outlet for your pain. But your family didn’t seem to accept your way of coping with your traumas.
The rest of the evening went off without a hitch. You got to know your brother's second family. They all had their own personalities, but that's what made them so endearing. Jake invited you to join them the next day, since it was their day off and they wanted to relax at the beach. You gladly accepted.
Robert didn't say much to you, the atmosphere between you was cold and tense. Natasha noticed it, so she joined her WSO to chat. "What's wrong, Bob? Your sister seems nice and yet you're here, not saying anything to her." He sighed a little as he watched you chatting and having fun with the others. "I'm worried about her," he confessed, "she… she hides herself in that personna… that Nemesis …” “Aren't all artists ? I mean, they wouldn't take a stage name otherwise.” “I guess… but I’m scared she’s losing herself…” he said softly, glancing at you. He grumbled when he noticed that Jake was flirting with you; and you didn't seem to refuse his advances either. Natasha let out a soft “damn” when Jake slid his arm around you and Bob almost jumped off his seat, mumbling an irritated “that’s it”. 
You felt a strong hand gripping your wrist and you were drawn out of Jake’s embrace and out the bar. “The hell Robby ?” you scoffed once outside, “I was in the middle of a conversation !” “No you weren’t, you were flirting ! With one of my teammates !” “First off, he initiated it ! And second, in what world is that your business ? We’re grown ups, I can handle some flirting !” “Well, first off , you’re my sister and second , Hangman is… he’s not the type to settle down !” he tried to explain himself but you just rolled your eyes. “Oh my god, you sound just like dad ! Why should I settle down ? I’m having fun, I’m happy that way !” You pinched the bridge of your nose, annoyed. “Stop trying to father me, I’m doing fine since I left !” “Yeah, you seem real good in the local news,” he mumbles, putting his hands in his pockets. He didn't even look at you as he said those words. You hated it when he did that, always half-assing his thoughts. You couldn’t help but let out a nervous laugh, tilting your head back.  “And now you sound like mom. I can handle my life just fine Robert. I don’t need your concern, let alone your judgment ! I’ve never been better, ok ? Leave me the fuck alone !”
You were lying. You both knew that. He could read into you so easily, it made you sick. Call it ‘twin magic’ or ‘sibling intuition’, you still hated the way his blue eyes looked at you with worry and questions in them, knowing all too well that you were not fine. 
You passed him, going back to the bar to get your stuff and pay Penny. Out of spit - and mostly because you wanted to - you handed your number to Jake and left with a smirk. You could hear the squad gently hassle Hangman who proudly showed off the piece of paper you gave him. 
A little fun won’t kill you, would it ?
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The next day, you joined the Dagger squad on the beach, near the Hard Deck. 
They were playing a strange football game ; dogfight football , attack and defense at the same time, Natasha explained to you.  You watched their first round and second, it seemed fun. At least, Bob seemed to have fun. You remembered he was not a teamsport guy younger. He actually hated the fact that your dad made him go to the tryouts for the football team in high school. To his misfortune, he got in. You smiled and sighed remembering those days.  Sometimes, you missed the time you were close to your twin, when you could tell him everything, before it all fell apart in junior year. A cold shiver ran down your spine while you thought back about it. Your life changed so much at that time, you didn’t like to remember it.
Crouching in front of you, Jake snapped you out of your reverie. “Hey there darlin, care to join us ? We’ll be gentle, promise.” he said with a playful grin. You arched an eyebrow and sneered. “Oh please, don’t be, I can handle it.” He laughed and helped you up. You were put in his team against Natasha, Bob, Bradley and Reuben. You were - to your own surprise - pretty fast and efficient. Javy and Jake joked around saying that being stealth had to be running in the family. 
You really had fun, even laughing with your brother. You didn’t know who won but you scored the last point of the game, and Jake put you on his shoulders to celebrate before tossing you in the water. “You’re a dead man, Seresin !” you shouted, before laughing. Robert helped you out the water and gave you a towel without a word. You silently thanked him and you all took a water break while deciding what to eat.
Reuben and Mickey volunteered to go get the pizzas and while they did, Natasha proposed a volleyball match. She decided that Bob and you would be in her team and you smiled. Bob couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle ; the two of you loved that sport when you were kids. When you went to your grandma's house for the holidays, you used to play against your cousins. Of course, you kicked their ass. They called you the Evil Twins. Once your heads were in the game, you were unstoppable. And Bradley, Jake and Javy would soon understand why you and Bob were so happy to be on the same team. 
The two of you didn’t even need to talk to understand the next move of the other. Even Natasha didn’t really understand what was happening. You won the first, then second, then third match. You laughed at the exasperation of Jake and Javy, Bradley on the other hand was just tired of running around. He quit with Natasha, leaving Jake and Javy to find a strategy to strike Bob and you down. “Like the old times huh ?” your twin smiled, giving you a bottle of water. You returned the smile and nodded. “Let’s show them. Evil Twins ?” “Evil Twins.” He clapped his hands with yours with a grin. Oh, the other two weren't ready for the beating they were about to get.
Javy called it quits after the third set. They lost them all and he was getting tired. Jake was pouting while you jumped on your brother’s back. “Evil Twins for the win !” Natasha laughed. You giggled, while Robert ran around like a doofus, you on his back, taunting Jake.  "Don't tease him too much, you know he's a sore loser!" sneered Bradley. "Nonsense!" sulked Jake, "I always accept my defeats, except they never happen.” The rest of the team rolled their eyes, both annoyed and amused.
Reuben and Mickey returned with the pizzas, and the rest of the afternoon was less athletic. Some went for a swim, others played cards in the shade of an umbrella. You chatted peacefully with Natasha and Jake, Robert never too far away. Strangely enough, you were glad he stayed close. Sometimes he would join in the conversation, but he remained Bob, preferring to watch and listen rather than talk.  It was a nice afternoon, you felt like a teenager on holiday with a bunch of friends. Bradley and Javy started a water fight by grabbing Bob and throwing him in the water. You and Natasha ran at the boys to avenge him and one thing led to another and you all ended up in the water, friendly fighting each other.
The sun slowly got low, the afternoon ending peacefully. You stayed at the bar with the squad, learning more about each one, more about your brother’s ‘new’ life. They told you about their life on base and about the bird strike that Natasha and Bob had suffered from. You scolded your twin because he never told you about it. He defended himself by saying that it was not that big of a deal, but by the looks on the others' faces, you knew he lied.
Part of you was jealous of him. You both left home around the same time, and he seemed so happy now, away from your parents and their intrusive presence, away from your father's demoralizing, degrading and demotivating comments. You couldn't understand how he could be doing so well when you were struggling to find yourself, to be happy. This question echoed in your head and made you feel too much in the room. You excused yourself and went outside for some fresh air. You were pale and shaking, and anxiety was getting the better of you. You tried to ease your breathing and closed your eyes to focus on the sound of the waves in front of you. You could hear the laughter and indescribable conversations in the distance, mingled with the music and singing. It was somewhat peaceful and yet you couldn't calm the flood of painful memories that invaded your mind. Every laugh reminded you of your ex's, every burst of voice a little too loud made you cower. You didn't want to think about it anymore. You wanted to forget everything. You just wanted it to stop. It had to stop. You had to get away from it all. You had to-
“Y/N ? Are you ok ?”
Your brother's gentle voice made everything disappear. You felt yourself breathe again. But you knew it would only be temporary ; because seeing him worried would make you weak and anxious again.  You took a deep, shaky breath before turning to him. You tried to hide the tremble of your voice, and put on a fake smile. "It's okay... I... I have to go home. Thanks for today, it was fun!" You passed him in a hurry, still pale and scrapie.  
He sighed and bit his lip before summoning his courage. "What are you running from? You... you looked like you were fine, and then all of a sudden you're running away. " "Robby, please-" "What happened?" "Nothing, I-" "Did someone say something?" "No! I just-" "Did I say or do something wrong? Tell me!" "Then let me talk for god’s sake !" you clenched your fists then sighed. "You didn't do anything wrong, Robby. It's just that... I can't..." your voice cracked a little and you leaned your head back to hold back your tears. Bob's head tilted in concern and he stepped towards you. "Can't what? You can't do what?"
You didn't answer, shaking your head. You couldn't put into words the confusion you felt. You searched for words and began to pace back and forth. "Can't do what Y/N?" Robert insisted gently. "I... fuck... fuck." 
Your voice and your whole body were shaking. It was getting harder and harder to hold back the tears. How could you tell your brother that you envied him and hated that feeling ? How could you envy him for building his life, a life filled with healthy loved ones that were there for him? How could you hold a grudge when he was the one who got you out of your abusive relationship at the risk of his acceptance into the naval academy ?
He took another step towards you, reaching for your hand, but you stepped back. "Hey, come on, tell me-" "I can't get over it, okay?! I-I can't figure out how and why you managed to grow up and I'm stuck at 17! Why do I always feel like I'm in pieces, alone, like he 's still running my life, like he 's always there, over my shoulder, no matter what I do?" "Y/N... it wasn't your fault-"  "I know!!! I fucking know it wasn't my fault!!” you cut him, almost screaming, “I know he 's the one who did this to me, who pretended to love me, who beat the shit out of me and abused me every single day for months! I know all of that ! Then why am I still stuck there ? Why am I the one still struggling?! Why am I the one who feels like a complete failure ? Why can't I let it go?!" your bottom lip was trembling as tears rolled down your face. “Why can’t I just move on ? Why do I always hear dad saying ‘told you so’ or mom sighing every time I mess up ? Why don’t they ever want to talk about what happened but they urge me to just forget about it ?! Why don't they support me ? Why don’t you ?!” 
You gasped, trying to catch your breath, before you whimpered and cried like a baby. Bob stood still for a moment before pulling you into his arms and hugging you. He suspected that the events of your past were still haunting you, but not to this extent. And you felt that he didn't support you... he felt like shit. How could he neglect your feelings so much, how could he act the way he blamed your parents? He let you cry against him for a long moment, swallowing his discomfort. He was the one to blame, and he had to focus on you. "I... I'm sorry, Y/N. I... I didn't realize that my behavior was hurting you… I'm just worried, and I didn't show it the right way. I'm an idiot." "A big idiot," you mumbled, sniffling. "Yes, a big idiot. And I'd really like you to let me help you. We... We have contacts with some really good therapists for post-traumatic stress and stuff... I could give you their numbers?" You just nodded, your tears finally stopping.  "I'm sorry I yelled at you..." you mumbled. Bob smiled and pinched your side.  "Don't be, I deserved it. I’m sorry I tried to interfere between you and Hangman…" “He’s actually a sweet guy behind his smug facade, y'know ?” you smiled and chuckled to his falsely doubtful face and the little 'meh' he let out.
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As promised, Bob put you in touch with the therapists he'd told you about, and negotiated a longer return period with your agency. You had a full month and a half more. You started to really work on the singles, and your sessions with the therapist were helping. You knew you'd have to keep seeing one when you got home.  But going wasn’t something you wanted to think about. As the days went by, you didn't want to leave San Diego. Your brother and the Dagger Squad were stationed here permanently, and you needed him in your life.
Him and Jake.
You always thought that the two of you were just a fling, that you or he would get tired of it and move on. But neither of you did. You spent more and more time with him, he'd crash at your Airbnb - uninvited - every now and then with a movie or dinner.  The more time you spent with him, the more you fell for him and you didn't want it to end as a one-night stand, you knew that much. 
As you got to dig beneath his proud, cocky, arrogant facade, you discovered a gentle man full of insecurities. He talked about his father, who was not exactly the ideal role model and the fact that he didn’t have the best of relations with him. He talked about his mama, and with the look he had in his eyes, you knew he worshiped the woman ; based on what he shared, you figured Mrs Seresin was more than strong and dedicated to her children. He told you about his sisters, both of them a couple of years older than him, and his nieces and nephews. He loved the munchkins - his terms, not yours - and you saw in his eyes how much he meant it. They were his whole world, but he’d never admit it.
You tried to take your time with him but he had a strange effect on you ; you found yourself opening up to him, faster than you thought.  You'd never told anyone about your abusive relationship - except Robert. And Jake had listened to you without judgment or interruption. He sat there, ready to absorb any information you wanted and were able to share.
So you were torn between your desire to get back to the recording studio in New York, to get back to work, and your desire to stay in the peaceful everyday life you'd created in just a few weeks. You had to go back. You had obligations to keep. Maybe after you fulfilled your part of the contract, you could negotiate and come back to San Diego? This thought was the only thing that kept you working hard. You succeeded in writing three more singles than the agreed two. You were quite pleased with yourself.
And sooner than you realized, you had to go back to New York.
Natasha, with the help of the rest of the team, had organized a little surprise going-away party at the Hard Deck. Penny was in on the secret and had given them the bar to themselves. You loved the surprise and the evening was unforgettable. Bradley had insisted on karaoke, and you dragged your twin along. Robert rolled his eyes, but played along. You had the time of your life and enjoyed every second of this last night with your new friends. They made you promise to call them whenever you could, to think of them and to come back as soon as possible. They took you home and spent a few more hours with you before letting you rest. But just when you thought everyone was gone, you found Jake on the couch, waiting for you. You felt butterflies in your stomach as you saw him there, his eyes anchored in yours. You detailed his face, as if to remember it after you'd left; his slightly wavy blond hair, those beautiful green eyes, his perfect jawline, his cocky smile. That damn smile that made you weak in the knees like a teenager. God, you hated that smile as much as you loved it.
"Enjoying the view?"
You didn't realize that he had stood up and was now so close to you. A deep blush spread across your cheeks and yet you couldn't take your eyes off him, your gaze locked with his. You bit your lip and grinned. "So what if I am, big boy?" you teased. He huffed, amused, and his hand slowly reached for yours, your knuckles brushing. His other hand reached for your cheek, his thumb stroking it tenderly. You leaned into his touch, feeling yourself melt under his gaze. He said nothing, his eyes never leaving you. "What?" you whispered, your heart beating a little faster. "That's how I want to remember you." "Like what? Tipsy and tired?" you laughed a little. "Na. Happy... relaxed... you look beautiful." Jake whispered back, his cheeks taking on a rosy hue. Your stomach fluttered and you found the courage to interlock his fingers with yours. "Sounds like I have you under my siren's spell, Lieutenant..." you teased, biting your lip. "You certainly do, ma'am," he whispered again, the gap between the two of you only a few inches. You felt your confidence slip from your fingers, your eyes on his lips.
"Kiss me..."
It's an almost inaudible beg that escaped you, and you didn't even have time to be embarrassed that you felt him on your lips. The kiss was sweet, tender. You squeezed his hand into yours, and his free one slid around your waist, holding you close. You wanted the kiss to last forever. With amazing ease, Jake lifted you against him, his hands going under your thighs. You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. He carried you into the bedroom, his lips exploring yours, your jaw, your neck and your collarbone. Your fingers brushed through his soft hair and soon you felt your back against the mattress.  Your clothes ended up chaotically thrown around the room as you undressed and kissed each other. The moon gave you just enough light to never lose sight of him. His eyes devoured you before his hands discovered your body. He asked you if you were okay every step of the way, and you never thought being asked for consent could be so arousing.
That night was the best sex you've ever had. It was slow and tender at first, and when you were both comfortable enough, it got rougher, in a good way.  You fell asleep curled up against him, rocked by his heartbeat.
The next morning you woke up alone in bed. Jake left a note on the nightstand, saying he had to go to work early. "Call me when you can, have a safe flight. PS: Gonna miss you. PPS: If anything happens to you on the flight, I'll hunt the pilot." You chuckled and tucked the post-it into your notebook. You quickly got ready and Robert took you to the airport.
The ride was rather quiet, neither of you wanting to be separated again. He helped you with your luggage and waited with you until you finally had to go. You hugged him tightly and thanked him for the past weeks. "Call me when you get there, okay? And don't forget to hydrate. And eat. And..." "Ok Dad," you joked with a smile, "I'll call you, don't worry. Love you, Robby." "I love you too. Be safe."
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8 months.
You have been stuck in New York for 8 long months. You did a lot though. A new album, some concerts, some interviews and photo shoots. The 'scandals' in the press disappeared and the journalists finally focused more on your songs. You video called the Daggers as much as you could - almost every day - and texted a lot with your brother, reassuring him that you continued to see a therapist and that you were doing well under the stress. But the one you called and texted the most was Jake. Every day you had a sweet good morning text, and every night you had an equally sweet good night text.
You missed him.
You missed them all, of course. But Jake Seresin was under your skin. And as hard as it was to admit, you loved him. You couldn't wait to see him again. Of course, no one knew you were together. Natasha seemed to have doubts, and sometimes Bob was somewhat suspicious too but as long as they didn’t ask you didn’t say anything.
8 months of hard work and your agent agreed to let you go to San Diego as he made an arrangement between a recording studio and your label.  You told no one but Penny. You wanted to surprise the team. You had one last show to do in New York and then you would catch your flight to California. 
Before the concert, you called your brother, knowing that he would probably be at the Hard Deck with the others, since it was almost 7:00 p.m there. As soon as he answered, you could hear the team around him. "Wow, look at you Nemesis! You look great!" Natasha said, smiling broadly. You laughed and thanked her when you heard the other whistle and complimented you. "Not too stressed?" Bob asked as the others calmed down. "Well, it's the last show for at least six weeks. I’ll try to make it fun!" "Of course you will," said a voice you recognized immediately. "Hangman, you look good," you teased as you saw him appear on the screen. You noticed the slight blush on his cheeks as he spotted you in your dress and makeup. He didn't have time to reply that you had to go on stage.  "Ok bye guys, gotta go, love you!" you hung up and had time to see a text message on your phone : 'You better keep that dress'. You smiled. You may have fallen in love with Jake, but you also knew you had him wrapped around your finger.
The show went smoothly, and after a celebratory dinner with your team, you went back to your soon-to-be-outdated apartment. All your things were packed and ready to go. You couldn't wait to move to San Diego. Your flight was at 3 pm in New York and you were scheduled to land in California at 6 pm. Bless the time zone difference, if you were lucky, you could get to the Hard Deck before the team and wait for them.
But since nothing ever goes exactly according to plan, your flight was an hour late. That wasn't too bad, you could still surprise them, you just had to change the way. You contacted Penny and asked her if she could manage to distract them. She agreed and gave you permission to use the back door to be more discreet when you entered. Your excitement was through the roof, you felt like a child on Christmas Day.  By the time your cab reached the bar, your heart was pounding in your chest. You couldn't believe you were finally there, finally where you felt at home. But you had to be reunited with those you considered family to feel completely at home. You almost ran to the back door of the bar, re-reading the instructions Penny had sent you: she'd distract the Daggers by asking them to bring back some heavy beer packs and other beverages, and you could hide discreetly by the pool table.
The perfect plan.
You did as she said, a smile forming on your lips as you heard your friends in the distance. You were stressed, but not in an anxious way, you just couldn't wait. You picked up a pool cue to keep your hands busy. When you finally heard them coming, you bit the inside of your cheek to keep from screaming ‘surprise!’. The first person to spot you was Mickey. His eyes widened and he stopped dead in his tracks, almost tripping Reuben, Natasha and Javy. They didn't have time to grumble before Mickey pointed at you, speechless. A small laugh escaped you as they froze in front of you, one after the other. Only Jake, Bradley and Robert were missing. Bradley and your twin were chatting, a little bit behind, and you soon heard Robert's voice.
"Are you guys okay? You look like you've seen a ghost..." His voice became almost inaudible at the end of his sentence, as he realized they were all staring at you. You smiled at them and tilted your head. "Are we playing, or are you afraid of losing?" you asked with a bit of a laugh. Natasha couldn't hold back her laughter and almost ran to hug you. "It's good to see you again, Mini Floyd."
The others came right after to greet you, hugging you and sometimes lifting you off the ground. You laughed, happy to see them again. Your twin was still frozen, not believing his eyes. You scooted up to him and pinched his cheeks. "Good evening Robby, did you-" You didn't even have time to finish your sentence before he pulled you into his arms. You smiled and hugged him as tightly as you could, small tears of joy escaping from both of you.  "It's good to see you," he finally said, "Missed your stupid face.” "Oh I know you did, you can't live without me dearest brother !" you chuckled. You caught up with everyone, admitting that you were on a break, but not telling them that you were here for good. You wanted everyone to be here to make that announcement but someone was missing.
You paid for your round of beers - and sparkling water for Bob - and went looking for Jake. Why wasn't he here?  Penny grinned as she noticed the look on your face. "Don't worry Y/N, he's just on the phone with his sister. One of his nephews' birthdays, I think." "Thanks Pen- Wait, what are you-" "I know everything dear, he talks too much for his own good if you ask the good questions." "How did you find out?" you whispered, making sure no one was listening. "Well, it wasn't really hard. Some of your interviews or shows have been aired," she pointed at the old TV, "and the calls you made ; he just had that look in his eyes. I can tell when a man is head over heels. He certainly is."
You blinked and shook your head in disbelief. Of course she'd guessed; Penny knew the squadron like her own children. She chuckled and handed you another beer. “Go surprise him.” You smiled and nodded, heading to the front door. Your heart fluttered when you finally heard Jake’s voice. It was hushed but you could feel his smile through his soft laughter. You waited for him to end his call, still hidden by the door. You bit back a chuckle when you heard him saying goodbye to the kids with a baby voice. It was ridiculously adorable.
“Hello stranger, does that pretty voice have a name ? ” 
He was a bit startled and turned to you hastily, not believing his ears. A surprised expression appeared on his face, but a flirtatious smile quickly took its place. "That's my line, baby." "Oh really? Supposed I forgot," You grinned proudly and took a step towards him, "Did ya miss me, big boy?" He grinned and grabbed your waist, sending a sweet shiver down your spine. "Not as much as you missed me." You rolled your eyes in amusement and set the beer you had brought him aside. You took a moment to just drown in his green eyes, the light of the sunset making them look surreal. How could he be so handsome ? 
He was quite speechless to have you here, it made you smile. Jake was always so talkative, it was strange to have him so quiet around you. "Cat got your tongue, Seresin?" He chuckled and stroked your cheek. "Why don't you check?" You smiled and finally kissed him. You had waited 8 months for this feeling and it was just so good. His soft lips against yours, his strong hands on your waist, fingers digging lightly into your flesh. You put your hands on his neck, parted your lips to let his tongue reach for yours. One of his hands slid up to cup your cheek and you leaned into his touch as the kiss ended.  "I have to admit, I missed that," he whispered with a grin, his forehead pressed gently against yours. You huffed and rolled your eyes, "Told you I had you under my spell." He laughed and kissed the nape of your neck, holding you close. You smiled and stroked his hair before stepping back.  "Let's join the team before ‘Tasha gets suspicious."
You took his hand and headed inside, eager to tell your friends the big news.
You missed the atmosphere of the Hard Deck. The soft songs from the jukebox, the always nice patrons, your favorite people at the pool table or playing darts... everything was so comforting. Your smile widened when you reached the Daggers, dragging Jake with you. "Look who I found outside," you teased, "good old Hangman.” "Ah, you should have let him out," Bradley sneered, sipping his beer. “Real funny Bradshaw, I know you already missed me.”
You let the two men fight like two children and when you noticed Natasha's eyes on your hand in Jake's, you blushed a little. She grinned and whispered something to Reuben. You could read a little 'damn it !' on his lips as he frowned. "Okay guys, Javy and I won! The bet is over!" "What? No!" Bradley was outraged. He grumbled and handed Natasha a bill.  "Wait a minute, what bet?" your twin asked. "Well, my dear Bob, it seems that our little Jake and your sister... are together." You blushed and wanted to hide, not knowing how your brother would react. Jake was already arguing with Javy, telling him he was a traitor for betting on it, since he had confided in him on the subject.
"Oh, I've known for a while," Robert said simply with a smile. "What?!" you huffed, letting go of your boyfriend's hand to face your twin. "What do you mean you knew?" "Well, for starters, Jake stayed with you the night before you went back to New York. And you hid the hickey he left on your neck badly. Then I got suspicious when every time we ended our video calls, he got one in the next two minutes; and he's not the most discreet when he's on the phone. But I knew it when he bought that really nice necklace and asked me, of all people, for advice. A week later you were wearing it. So yeah, I knew," he shrugged with a smile, laughing a little at your expression. "What? I just thought that neither of you were ready to tell anyone? But you seem happy so it's okay."
You were surprised. You didn't think he'd take it so well, but you weren't going to complain.
So the evening began with a secret revealed. You didn't hesitate to stay close to Jake, even ending up on his lap when the bar was full. You listened to their adventures from the last few months - at least what they were allowed to share.  It was good to be with them again, to find that comfort.  After Mickey bought his round, he turned to you. "Well, let's ask the burning question: how long are you staying?" "To tell you the truth... I'm not leaving. I'm moving into my little house 10 minutes from here tomorrow," you smiled. "And you didn't tell me?!" said Jake and Bob at the same time, making them blush under the laughter of the others. "I wanted to surprise you! I've got a new deal with my label, so I can stay here." "Cheers to that! To the definitive return of Y/N Nemesis Floyd," Bradley decreed, raising his beer.
You all laughed and toasted each other, happy with the news.
All was finally well.
You had finally found your place, and you wouldn't change it for the world.
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going-fanfics17 · 4 months ago
Text
assumed ( Woozi * OC )
Summary= people can't see others succeed. They just have to drag everyone down along with them and try to tarnish reputations.
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The article released by bbc caused a huge stir among Carats, they were furious and rightfully so, their favourite producer had been targeted by brainless journalists who could care less about the truth and were just money hungry. Twisting his words, they accused Woozi of using AI for writing his song lyrics. Completely disregarding his creativity, his passion and his hardwork. It was devastating to see his credit being taken away. And even though the whole Carat fandom was backing him up and tearing down Pledis and BBC for such a ridiculous article, Woozi couldn't help but lock himself in the studio and throw around things in anger.
When Scoups and Jeonghan failed to get him to come out, they called his girlfriend to come to their rescue. She drove down to the studio in 10 minutes. The guys left her alone to give the couple privacy.
"Jihoon-ah, it's me. Please open the door," she said softly.
"No," his voice sounded rough and broken.
"Then I guess I will sit here till you agree to open the door," she said as she plopped down on the floor and took out a packet of chips.
It was silent for half an hour and Y/N could sometimes hear her boyfriend sniffle and sob quietly.
"Do you know how many people think of you as their role model?", she asked .
No answer.
"14 million Carats and other kpop idols as well," she answered.
"Do you know how many people are defending you?"
No answer.
"14 million"
"Jihoon-ah, you only had 1000 korean won and a dream to produce music because you wanted to showcase your creativity and passion to the world. Don't let some bully take away your confidence and discredit you. You have worked hard, spent nights in this studio, starved yourself, to write the best songs. And the boys, the fans and me, we couldn't be more proud. Don't let them take it all away. they have no idea how hard you have worked."
Woozi mumbled something from the other side of the door.
The door opened and he stood there with a tear stained face ,"And Wonwoo's Macbook."
Y/N got up from the floor and hugged him. "You are the best producer who has written and produced 157 songs all on your own without the help of AI. You have the greatest range I have ever seen. You express emotions in your songs, you write songs of all genres. You should be proud of yourself, my love."
"Thank you," he said as Y/N kissed his cheek.
"You know what? Speak up. Clear up things. The evil people need to hear that. They can't just go on twisting your words and assuming things," she said as she went to his desk and picked up his phone and handed it to him.
"You are right. I will stand up to them. They don't have the right to take away my credit," Woozi said determined to prove every hater wrong.
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Dear BBC ,
Learn how to interpret and not twist the words and accuse real hardworking artists of using AI. You are journalists, it's your job to report the truth and not throw around false accusations. Woozi from Seventeen had worked hard for years to reach where he is today and you guys discrediting him and writing a stupid article where you have deliberately twisted his words to defame him is ridiculous and downright evil.
This is what most artists are afraid of , their creativity and talent not being recognized. You did the exact same today by defaming and discrediting an artist. He has written 157 songs and not one song has been written by using AI. Hope this clears it up. Thank you .
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