#getting tired of her getting so much hate and no one seeing things from her point of view

[shitpostingsapphic]

"I hate Caitlyn because of the system she represents. I'm so tired of people acting like we can'thate her for that."

Let's have a long, hard talk.

This argument IS made in direct comparison to the oppressive systems we see in real life, so let's first talk about how Caitlyn compares to real world oppressive systems, her faults and the ways she fails the people she serves, and then let's talk about how you're just fucking wrong about her and how you hate the wrong character.

Caitlyn is an enforcer. Stating the obvious. She is a member of a larger system she chose to be a part of, because she wanted to serve the people. She was ignorant of the system's corruption as we see throughout season 1. Her initial intentions with becoming an enforcer are because she wants to fight injustice, defy the stuff politics of Piltover that she was raised under, and have her own identity.

At the end of season 1, several things happen to Caitlyn. She is abducted naked from her home, held hostage for at minimum 24 hours, during which time an array of things could have happened to her but of which we know for certain left her TERRIFIED of the young girl with blue hair she was abducted by. She watches that same girl fire an explosive that kills her mother. Preceding this, she has been witness to the ways Silco has harmed the people of the undercity and how he had the enforcers in his pocket in order to do it. Ekko explicitly tells her this. He tells her how Silco has ruined lives and how the enforcers were the manpower that let it happen.

Caitlyn walks away from season 1 changed in many ways. She is brokenhearted and traumatized, but still holds a strong desire to protect the innocent people of both cities. Because of who she has been up to this point, her belief is that she can rectify the wrongs by using the power of her position to do good instead of aid corruption. Her asking Vi to become an enforcer to do as much is in bad taste, yes. Which she later apologizes for and takes ownership for. That doesn't remove the good intention behind it. And it doesn't negate that Vi can later see the logic behind it. Being able to take control of a bad situation and use that power to do good instead of abusing that power to do bad, is an incredibly shaky but important position to be in. And the whole point of Caitlyn's character is how she navigates that--can she use her position to do good? As per GOOD WRITING, she's not going to get it perfect until she learns and grows.

We can acknowledge the moral ambiguity of using the grey, how it does harm, while also acknowledging the WAY it was used and for what purpose was both smart, economical, and GOOD. Doing bad things for good reasons. That's what the use of the grey was.

I'm not going to get into the memorial much, but all I will say for that, is it's an excellent example of people twisting Caitlyn's words and underselling the pain she's going through. If you can't acknowledge the right Caitlyn has to be upset at the people who just violently disrupted a memorial for mourning the loss of loved ones, I don't think you care to have a conversation about the humane treatment of others. And using Caitlyn's anger and grief as a "see?? She hates Zaunites!!" is so fucking stupid I'm not going to entertain an argument for that.

Caitlyn's setback is her trauma, her ignorance, and her heartbreak. She still isn't a fully realized character throughout most of season 2. She's learning and growing and unfortunately that is at the expense of the people she lords over while enforcing martial law. But if we acknowledge that, we also have to acknowledge the ways she changed the system so that needless suffering and punishment didn't happen. Confronting Ambessa when violence is used unlawfully. Improving the prison food and banning the use of the most inhumane cells in Stillwater. Bare minimum? Yes. But still ways she showed that she saw the Zaunites as humans and not as flesh covered problems the way Salo does. Not as problems to get rid of the way Ambessa does.

If the reason for your ire is because Caitlyn is a figure in a corrupt system, then your hatred is misdirected. The point of Caitlyn is to show the ways the system needs to change, and how the people within it who want to do good can often be misguided, but that doesn't mean they aren't good people or that they can't do good within their position.

If you fundamentally disagree with that, there isn't much of an argument to be had, but I will say that your ire is still misdirected.

I never see you guys discuss Salo or Ambessa.

Salo represents true bigotry in the system. It's a position he maintains all the way up to when his mind is commandeered by Viktor and the hexcore. Salo is the type of person who functions on confirmation bias--he already has a prejudiced view of Zaunites, and will use any opportunity to say "see? Told you so! We should put them down." Compared directly to how Caitlyn talks about them, asks Vi to help fix the system, fights against the system going too far, actively makes adjustments to change the way the system treats Zaunites, the claims that Caitlyn is a bigot don't hold up.

Ambessa IS the system. She IS the oppressive force that indiscriminately will take and take and take and sees violence as a tool and not a consequence to be avoided at all costs the way Caitlyn does. And for some fucking reason, no one who criticizes Caitlyn gives any weight to Ambessa's actions, ever. They don't discuss the way she manufactures the attack on the memorial to manipulate public opinion on Zaunites, as well as manipulate Caitlyn. They don't discuss how she sets Caitlyn up to be pressured to take the position of Commander and uses her grief, promises her justice, in order to warm Caitlyn to her and keep her as an ally, a pawn she can use. They don't discuss how she sent Maddie to be a spy, to be in Caitlyn's bed and to be as intimately close to her as possible, to make sure Caitlyn still was behaving the way she needed in order to see her plan through.

When discussing the manipulative, exploitative, and violent nature of oppressive systems, Caitlyn has become the scapegoat, when it is people like Salo and Ambessa who deserve your blame and your ire.

You wonder why people don't take your complaints about Caitlyn seriously? That's why. Because the show gave you very bold examples of oppressive individuals in control of the systems you hate, and you ignore both of them for the sake of hating on a beloved lesbian character, who is beloved because she is flawed and good natured and whose journey we enjoy because it's all about learning what to do when you're within a system that pulls you at every direction to do evil, and you still find a way to do good.

Do some more think pieces on Salo and Ambessa. Then maybe we can have nuanced discussions on Caitlyn.

[seokminfilm]

longing to long for him ♫ lee seokmin

♫ pairing, lee seokmin x reader ♫ warnings, non-idol au, ceo au, husband seokmin, reader and seokmin have a baby girl, angst, hurt/no comfort, one allusion to being nude ♫ synopsis, you hate the feeling of being so close yet so far away.

♫ author's note, trying out a new layout! let me know your thoughts on it 🤍 been listening to same dream, same night, same mind by svt and suddenly had this urge to write something angsty with seokmin so here you go!! hurt no comfort too?? am i going insane?? (yes)

♫ now playing, same dream, same night, same mind, seventeen

♫ word count, 1.8k | for @kstrucknet

"welcome home, seokmin." your voice feels empty as you speak, but you bypass it, allowing your husband to bring you into his chest for a equally-empty hug.

being married to lee seokmin came with its ups and downs.

as the hardworking ceo of his own corporation, passed down to him by his grandfather, he always had a full, busy schedule. when seokmin wasn't busy in his office at home, he was on the road, driving from one meeting to another from sunrise to sunset.

as the youngest couple in the midst of seokmin's business partner circle, you were used to the so-called "advice" the older, married ladies would share with you at company dinner parties, as if it made the reality of your situation any better.

"there's no more time for love or play, now that mr. lee is climbing the ranks. you might as well get used to loveless nights, overdramatic reactions, and distant conversations. it happens to the best of us." one lady had said while stroking your back as if you were a miserable cat, and your skin boiled with anger, hoping that the lady would just drop dead.

the night you and seokmin had said "i do", he had laid down in your untouched hotel bed beside you, face and body still warm from the wedding's festivities. the sparkles in his eyes still haunt your memory to this day, and you could remember his sentence word for word, the feeling of his soft hand on your cheek as he looked into your eyes.

"no matter what happens from now until eternity, you'll always be on my mind."

that sentence was simple, but complex enough to make you teary eyed as seokmin hugged you, body engulfing yours as the sheets seemed to protect you from the harsh cold─the harsh cold being life without lee seokmin in it.

now, all you could feel was that cold.

"how's mihan?" seokmin's voice was tired, layers of disappointments and annoyance seeping into his words. his eyes were tired too, gaze harsh as he stripped himself of his shoes.

his styled hair was still flawless from this morning, and the sharp point of his nose was highlighted by the light shining down on him as he looked at his sleeping baby girl in your arms. she had your eyes and his nose, resting peacefully in her swaddle as you sighed, giving a small smile if only for her.

"she's doing okay. she's been sleeping all day." you say, and seokmin nods, sighing as he leans against the countertop. he stares up at the light, eyes unflinching as he shuts them tightly seconds later. the sigh that leaves his lips is felt, and your heart falls a little bit more, watching him bypass you without another word and disappear into your shared bedroom.

it hurts to see him leave without another kiss or tight hug like he used to do. as much as you wanted to ignore the warnings given to you in the early stage of your marriage, they were like bright stage lights, illuminating the things even you wanted to deny.

love used to be such an integral part of you and seokmin's marriage, and now, no matter how hard you looked or tried to pretend, you couldn't see it anymore. you couldn't remember the last time you or seokmin had said the phrase 'i love you' without sounding tired or empty, and it made your heart ache.

tears pricked the corner of your eyes as you walked to your bedroom, and mihan stirred in your arms, lips turning into a small smile as her tiny fingers clung to your shirt─the faded smiski tee seokmin had let you have the first time you had come home with him.

even he didn't recognize the shirt now. that, or he just didn't care anymore.

sitting on the bed after putting mihan to bed in her crib just a few steps away from you, you wipe the now freely falling tears from your eyes, wedding ring glinting on your finger as you chew at your lip, falling silent as the shower turns off in the bathroom.

soft piano lullabies play from your phone to calm down both you and mihan, and you sigh, turning away from the door as it opens to reveal seokmin's fresh face and toned figure, sweatpants thrown on around his waist as he scrubs his face dry.

your eyes meet for a second, taking each other in, and for a moment, it feels like old times again─the shyness you feel rising up in your body is just like when you saw seokmin nude for the first time, and it makes you turn away again, holding back fresh tears.

seokmin cleans up his mess, throwing his suit in the clothes hamper as he combs his fingers through his wet hair. his dark brown eyes seem to have more shadow under them, and he slowly makes his way to the bedside, crashing onto the sheets without a second thought.

silence goes through the room like a blaring siren, suffocating in nature as you look over to your husband. he's already fighting sleep, letting the silence and drip of the showerhead lull him to dreamland. his face is relaxed now, eyes half-lidded as he meets your gaze.

something lingers behind his eyes, but you don't know what, and before you can work up the courage to speak, he falls asleep, leaving you to long for him even more.

how long would you be longing to have lee seokmin back?

[saebyeokbliss]

JUST MEET ME AT THE APT.— K. SAE-BYEOK

PROLOGUE

synopsis: managing a rising rock band is already chaotic enough, but when you're stuck touring with four reckless musicians, things get even messier. between late-night facetime calls, teasing that feels a little too knowing, and a certain guitarist who might just be your biggest problem, keeping things professional is getting harder by the second. but hey, no one said the music industry was easy.

warnings: mutual pining, intense eye contact, teasing that borders on flirting (or maybe it is flirting), friends who refuse to mind their business, late-night facetime calls, secondhand embarrassment, slow burn that burns, emotional whiplash

playlist: spotify

MIDDLE SCHOOL

You had always been the type of person everyone liked. Not in a popular way, necessarily—more like in a no one had a reason to hate you kind of way. You were nice. Sweet, even. You made friends easily, smiled at everyone, and knew how to navigate the complicated web of middle school social groups without making any real enemies.

The same couldn’t be said for them.

Hot Division wasn’t a band yet. They were just four girls who stuck together because no one else really wanted to deal with them. Kang Sae-Byeok, Kang No-Eul, Kim Ji-Yeong, and Han Se-Mi—the troublemakers, the misfits, the ones teachers sighed at when they walked into class. They weren’t bad kids, exactly, but they weren’t easy either.

Ji-Yeong talked too much, always had something snarky to say back to authority figures. Se-Mi was loud and restless, constantly pushing people’s buttons just to see how far she could go. No-Eul was quiet but terrifying in her own way, her deadpan expressions making it impossible to tell what she was thinking. And Sae-Byeok… well, she was the worst of them all. Not because she was mean, but because she was impossible to read. She was sharp, observant, and had a way of staring people down until they either walked away or decided they wanted to be her enemy.

You’d tried to be nice to them once. It didn’t go well.

“Why do you even talk to everyone?” Ji-Yeong had asked, narrowing her eyes suspiciously at you from across the lunch table. “It’s weird.”

“It’s not weird,” you had defended, frowning. “It’s just called being friendly.”

Sae-Byeok, sitting next to her, had scoffed. “It’s fake.”

That had stung more than you wanted to admit.

After that, you stopped trying. They didn’t want to be friends with you? Fine. You had plenty of other people to talk to.

At least, that was your plan—until you caught some of your so-called friends cornering them behind the school one afternoon.

It wasn’t an unusual sight—older kids messing with younger ones, especially kids like them. Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi were too mouthy for their own good, No-Eul never bothered to stand up for herself, and Sae-Byeok… well, she usually just glared until people got tired of trying.

But today was different.

Maybe it was the way one of the boys had grabbed Ji-Yeong’s backpack, holding it just out of reach as she jumped for it, face twisted in frustration. Maybe it was how Se-Mi’s usual teasing grin had disappeared, her fists clenched at her sides. Maybe it was No-Eul, standing stiff and silent, her expression unreadable but her knuckles white.

Or maybe it was Sae-Byeok, watching it all happen with that same emotionless stare—like she expected it, like she had already decided there was nothing she could do.

Something inside you snapped.

“Hey!” Your voice cut through the air like a whip, sharp enough that even the boys turned to look at you in surprise. You stormed forward, eyes blazing. “Are you serious right now?”

One of them—Joon, a guy you had known since elementary school—blinked at you. “What?”

“You’re really picking on them?” You gestured at the girls, your voice dripping with disbelief. “That’s pathetic. What, you don’t have anything better to do?”

Joon scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Relax, we’re just messing around.”

“Oh, messing around?” You let out a sharp, humorless laugh. “That’s funny, because from where I’m standing, it looks like you’re just being a bunch of insecure little shits who get off on bullying girls younger than you.”

A beat of silence.

Ji-Yeong made a strangled choking sound—either in shock or amusement, you weren’t sure. Se-Mi’s eyes were wide, No-Eul was watching you with something almost like curiosity, and Sae-Byeok… Sae-Byeok was staring at you like she had never seen you before.

Joon’s face darkened. “What’s your problem?”

“My problem,” you snapped, stepping closer, “is that I thought you were better than this. Guess I was wrong. And trust me, Joon—if you don’t back off right now, I’ll make sure everyone knows just how pathetic you are.”

That did it.

Joon hesitated, glancing at his friends. They shifted uncomfortably. You weren’t the type of person people expected to blow up like this. You were supposed to be nice. And the thing about being nice? People listened to you.

“Tch.” Joon clicked his tongue, shoving Ji-Yeong’s backpack back into her arms. “Whatever. Let’s go.”

And just like that, they left.

You let out a breath, your anger still simmering, before turning back to the girls.

Ji-Yeong was the first to break the silence. “Holy shit,” she breathed, eyes gleaming. “That was awesome.”

Se-Mi grinned, clapping you hard on the back. “Didn’t think you had it in you, sweetheart.”

You rolled your eyes, but your lips twitched slightly. “Yeah, well. Someone had to do it.”

No-Eul tilted her head. “You didn’t have to.”

You met her gaze evenly. “Yeah. I did.”

A pause.

Then, slowly, Sae-Byeok spoke for the first time since the whole thing started.

“…Maybe you’re not so fake after all.”

She didn’t say thank you. But you got the feeling that, in her own way, she just did.

And that was the start of everything.

HIGH SCHOOL

The Kang household was always a little chaotic.

Not in the way Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi were chaotic, with their constant teasing and impulsive antics—but in a quieter, lived-in way. Their apartment was small, cramped even, but it never felt suffocating. It was warm. Comfortable. A place you had come to know as well as your own home over the years.

And right now, it was a mess.

“Ji-Yeong, stop blowing that in my face,” you grumbled, waving a hand in front of your nose as she exhaled another cloud of smoke toward you on purpose.

She grinned, eyes already a little glassy as she passed the joint back to Se-Mi. “Relax, sweetheart. It’s secondhand at best.”

Se-Mi took a hit, exhaling toward the ceiling before stretching out on the floor. “You should try it sometime,” she drawled, grinning up at you. “Might help with all that stress you carry around.”

“I’m not stressed,” you muttered, flipping through your notes.

“You’re always stressed.”

No-Eul, sitting cross-legged on the couch beside you, barely looked up from her textbook. “She’s stressed because she actually does her homework.”

Se-Mi groaned dramatically. “God, you sound just like a responsible older sister.”

“I am a responsible older sister.”

“Debatable.”

You snorted, turning to Sae-Byeok, who was sitting beside No-Eul, her legs stretched out on the coffee table. “Are you really going to let them just slack off like this?”

She shrugged. “Not my problem.”

Ji-Yeong made a face at you. “See? Sae-Byeok gets it.”

You sighed, shaking your head fondly. “You guys are hopeless.”

Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi continued their lazy bickering, letting the music from Se-Mi’s old speaker fill the apartment. It was some rock song you didn’t recognize, the bass thrumming through your chest.

No-Eul, always the most responsible of the group, was actually getting work done, her pen scratching against her notebook. You admired that about her—quiet, steady, always moving forward.

Sae-Byeok, on the other hand, was watching you.

“You’re really not gonna try it?” she asked, nodding toward Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi.

You rolled your eyes. “Oh, come on. You don’t even smoke.”

She smirked slightly. “Doesn’t mean I don’t think it’d be funny to see you high.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you muttered, nudging her knee with yours.

She didn’t move away.

It was getting late when you all finally decided to move.

No-Eul glanced at the time, closing her textbook with a sigh. “We should go pick up Cheol.”

Sae-Byeok groaned but got up anyway, stretching her arms over her head. “Come on,” she said, grabbing her jacket. “You coming?”

You nodded, grabbing your own bag before nudging Ji-Yeong and Se-Mi with your foot. “You two staying here?”

Se-Mi waved a lazy hand. “We’ll catch up later.”

“Try not to get arrested,” Ji-Yeong added, smirking.

You rolled your eyes as you followed the Kang sisters out the door.

The walk to Cheol’s after-school program wasn’t far. The air was cool, the sky darkening into early evening. The three of you walked in comfortable silence for a while, the city sounds filling the spaces between your words.

“You’re over at our place a lot,” No-Eul commented after a moment, glancing at you.

You shrugged. “You guys make it easy to stick around.”

Sae-Byeok smirked. “That’s just because we’re more fun than your other friends.”

You gave her a look. “What other friends?”

She snorted. “Fair point.”

The conversation lapsed again, and then—

“…You really didn’t have to stand up for us back then, you know,” Sae-Byeok said suddenly, her voice quieter, more thoughtful.

You blinked, surprised by the shift in topic. “What?”

“In middle school,” she clarified. “With Joon and his friends.”

You frowned. “Of course I did.”

Sae-Byeok glanced at you, her expression unreadable. “Why?”

You hesitated, then shrugged. “Because you’re my friends.”

No-Eul hummed in agreement. “That’s just how she is.”

“That’s not how most people are,” Sae-Byeok muttered.

You nudged her gently with your shoulder. “Well, maybe you just had shitty people in your life before.”

She huffed a quiet laugh but didn’t argue.

By the time you reached the community center, Cheol was already waiting outside, his small backpack slung over his shoulders. His face lit up when he saw the three of you.

“Noona!” he said, running up to No-Eul and Sae-Byeok. Then, turning to you, he grinned. “And other Noona!”

You laughed, ruffling his hair. “Hey, kiddo. Ready to go?”

He nodded enthusiastically. “Did you bring snacks?”

Sae-Byeok rolled her eyes. “You think we’re made of money?”

Cheol pouted.

You reached into your bag, pulling out a candy bar you had grabbed earlier. “Here,” you said, handing it to him with a smile.

His face brightened. “You’re my favorite Noona.”

Sae-Byeok scoffed. “Unbelievable.”

No-Eul just shook her head fondly as the four of you started walking home, the city buzzing softly around you.

And for the first time in a long time, Sae-Byeok thought that maybe—just maybe—letting you into their lives had been the best decision they ever made.

taglist: @everly-summers-solace @knfthxv @madebysae @knfthxv @katieschry1 @imlackingsleep @lyzem @stellssxo @wiltingconquest @peelover25

[jackoshadows]

"... best you have a new face as well.” He cupped her chin, turned her head this way and that, nodded. “A pretty one this time, I think. As pretty as your own." - Arya, ADwD

A recap and a lesson for fandom newbies -

We have this CANON ACCURATE fanart of Arya Stark from the incredibly talented Tonyloom with the long face, brown hair and grey eyes dressed for feast time at Winterfell as the daughter of the Warden of the North.

A Sansa fan gets triggered by this Arya fanart because it's different from ones that Sansa stans usually like for their 'Stark sisters' fanart - where Arya is drawn dark skinned to highlight Sansa's fair complexion because Sansa is beautiful and Arya is ugly, where Arya is missing teeth, always a sword in hand, messy hair being braided by Sansa to conform to what Sansa likes etc. - and goes on an insane rant about how Arya fans don't want Arya to be ugly because of equating goodness to beauty....

So Arya fans respond to this attack on the fan artist and point to the book text where several characters call Arya pretty and beautiful and ask why they should consider the character ugly when she is not in the text of the books.

A BNF then jumps into the discourse and reblogs the 'Arya is ugly and Arya fans have internalized misogyny' post and pretends that Arya fans are the ones starting this whole discourse on Arya's looks.

BNF tags it as 'This is weird discourse, who cares if Arya is pretty'. Who cares if Arya is pretty? The weird, racist Sansa stan that you reblogged the post from, who got triggered by some Arya fan art and had to go on an entire rant, that's who. Who cares? Well you cared enough to reblog an 'Arya is ugly' post and point fingers at Arya fans, that's who.

And now the BNFs reblog spreads like wildfire amongst the casual fans and we have many who actually think that canon Arya is ugly and Arya fans just have internalized misogyny. This, children, is how the many wrong but popular fanon gets created.

Remember, this BNF had nothing to say about racist Arya fanart. Nothing to say about sexist posts where Arya is masculinized and her femininty stripped from her. Nothing to say about the many posts from Sansa stans/Jonsa shippers about how Jon is repulsed by Arya's ugliness and loves Sansa because she is so beautiful.

But they had to step in and make sure everyone knew that Arya is ugly and it's Arya fans who are the problem.

This is actually nothing new. The reason there is so much wrong misinformation about Arya and Daenerys, and the way this fandom has opinions about these two female characters, is because it's been crafted over decades of fandom BNF's spreading posts and meta like this through BNF blogs like Asoiafuniversity. Explained so well in this post here:

Villainizing Arya fans as 'bad fans' has long been a thing in fandom. Asoiafuniversity, which was the goto place for all things asoiaf in those days, had actual posts equating Arya fans to Walter White fans from Breaking bad who hated on his wife Skylar.

Keep in mind, this is an actual quote from a post on the most popular asoiaf blog when the fandom was very active:

The interesting thing about Arya is that unlike most of the male Bad Fan icons, she doesn’t have a wife to embody her Bad Fans’ frustrations and serve as an outlet for their ire – no Betty Draper, no Skyler White, no Carmela Soprano. Instead, she has a sister, Sansa, who winds up serving the same function. Much of Bad Fandom is a gendered phenomenon, pulling for he-man figures against shrewish wives who just don’t understand them. It’s fascinating to see how the phenomenon can alter itself to accommodate a female-female pairing while still targeting characteristics we typically gender female. The Bad Fan is nothing if not durable.

So much toxic sexism masquerading as feminism, where they equate Arya fans to the chuds who hate female characters and whose unfair target is Sansa because she is 'female'. And Arya is a 'he-man' figure....The mind boggles.

But this was the typical vile sexist garbage Bnfs were spewing about both Arya and Daenerys in the days when fandom was most active and this is where a majority of the sexist opinions about Arya and Dany comes from.

This is why these canonically wrong aspects of these characters are so widespread and entrenched in fandom thought that it doesn't matter if we use actual book quotes to show that it's the exact opposite.

[aleksa-sims]

RL Story

Time has come to say goodbye. I hate farewells! You might think it would be a routine for us, but it never felt easier than the times before. In addition, our little one has become accustomed to his Dad now. I think it’s because he was a few months older and because N. stayed with us at home, longer than usual. I noticed that the two have finally gotten closer. I have often left Nico alone with Lucas for several hours and our son has never cried, which was unusual. But, as it turns out, this had changed. I was very happy about it.

It wasn’t easy for me to leave the two alone at first. But if I don’t trust N., how should our son do it, or learn to trust his Dad? That’s why, I’ve retired and let Nico do. Since N. helped me with our Baby, I was not so tired anymore and and in general I was much better. The last three months were nice, perfect! I wish he could stay home. 😢

During our time together at home, I noticed some.... new things about Nico, that I honestly didn’t know before. Like... that he reads a lot. I’ve never seen Nico with a book before!! I talked to him about it. I think the last few months without soccer were pleasant for him. He is usually only busy with soccer. He practices for hours every day! There are certain goals he must achieve, and he is under enormous pressure to perform. Also this little time off he had now, will have a negative impact on his career. He knew that! That’s why he was so angry when they sent him home, because of his injuries. But that’s what happened! He can’t change it. He will now have to work twice as hard as usual just to catch up. Which also means I won’t see him for a long time. 😞😢Our son also not! He’ll forget him again. 😞

Things will change for me. My health started to get worse from that point on. Nevertheless, it will still be about a year, before I get this horrible diagnosis of leukemia. Shortly after that, Sandra will also.....well you know, what I mean.

Oh, and why Bianca called Daniel a drug dealer the other day was a misunderstanding. Philip mentioned something about Daniel that night in the club and Bianca heard it. He also told her the whole story about D., me, and him, weeks before. After that, I was mad at Philip.😒

Previous/Next

[ezrasxfics]

some theatrebunny angst perhaps? maybe gangle feeling as if nobody really cares much about her and jax has to convince her otherwise? :3

(also hi ezra hope your days goin good)

you gotta be kidding me, you have plenty of people who care.

-

ribbun/theatrebunny

-

gangle pov

just.. another day. another day of looking at those fake smiles, hearing those forced words of reassurance. i know that none of them actually like me, so why do they have to keep pretending like they do? i mean, i’d hate for them to hate me, but i also hate them having to lie to keep me happy. i don’t want to be a burden.

at least one person doesn’t have to lie.

i glance over at jax, who’s messing with ragatha, as usual. he messes with all of us. it must be lonely, living like he does, but at least people don’t lie and pretend to like him. i can’t deny i’m a little jealous sometimes - he can just.. get people’s true colours out, in a way. it’s actually really interesting to watch.

he catches my eye, and starts to head over here, causing a small panic to set in me. i like being a spectator, not a victim.. is that cruel? i mean, im a cruel person, so why am i questioning that?

“hey, crybaby, how the hell’re you so down with that freakin’ happy mask of yours on?” he questions, and despite the wording, there’s not even a hint of malice behind his tone, just curiosity. surely there’s an ulterior motive, how would someone like him ever be.. well, not nice, but bearable??

“i guess.. i’m just tired of feeling like a- a burden-“ i stammer, looking up at him with wide, worried eyes. “everyone’s always so nice to me.. and i think they feel forced to-“

“bullsh*t,” he interrupts bluntly, making me flinch. “what reason to those guys have to hate you? you’re a decent person. you’ve not really done anything wrong, have ya?”

“i mean.. no, but-“

“yeah, no. it’s a one word answer, babe, and you’ve just finished it. you said no. so, you’ve done nothing wrong, they have no reason t’ hate ya. no ifs or buts, got it?” he interrupts again, eyebrows furrowed in sheer confidence in what he’s saying. but.. why is he being so kind? is he trying to lie like everyone else-? no. what would he have to gain from lying to me.? he’s not gonna risk his whole reputation just for a joke, right?? but, he could-? NO!! no, gangle, for once you need to take things at face value. he’s being nice. accept it and move on. let yourself enjoy the moment, it might be the only time this ever happens.

“yeah.. thank you, jax. i appreciate it— i’m sorry for bothering you-“

“you apologise way too much. it’s kinda pathetic-“ he jokes, but i can see the lightheartedness in it, and actually find myself laughing along.

why am i feeling like this? i’m supposed to hate him.. he’s caused me nothing but suffering since i got here, and yet, here i am, finally getting along with him? hoping things will change, and maybe we’ll be friends..? or more..? okay, maybe i’m being a little delusional on that part.. but i love the enemies to lovers trope, maybe a little too much..! i’m projecting again..

oh well, i guess a girl can dream.

and you know what they say, make your dreams come true.

<3

-

hey!! i’m actually doing pretty good, thanks for checking in!! i hope you’re good too, and thanks for the request!!

reblogs appreciated!!

[princessmaeee]

Let Me Show You _ Sneak Peak

L e t. M e. S h o w. Y o u Working on some Valentin's day One Shot and I noticed a Lot of people seem to Love TOP/ Seung Hyun stories, so one of those One Shot will be about him and there's a little Sneak Peak of it. Nothing too wild, but YES It will contain S M U T in the full version.

The idea it's that Reader have a lot of presure on her Shoulders since she's the leader of her group and want everything to be perfect. Her and Seung Hyun didn't date since that long, aroud six months and she have some bad experience with her ex so she fear some situation, like intimacy. She's use to not be satisfed and she just hate that, so when her current boyfriend offer her to bring her somewhere for the week end, she definatly gonna freak out.

You were a rising star at YG since you debuted last year. At first, you were supposed to be a solo artist but you ended up being part of a girl group with Six Other girls. Your concept was about rainbow colors and  every girl had a Color assigned. You were the red and since it’s the first color of the rainbow, you were also the leader. You didn’t like any of that and it just put pressure on your shoulders. When your first vidéo came out, all the group wore an outfit with their assigned color for eyes, hair, makeup and accessories. It gave you magical girl energy and you liked it. 

As the leader of the group, you always made sure every girl ate enough or had enough sleep. You even helped every of them with every choreography until late at night if they needed it. You even wrote songs for the group and one of them was your third Music vidéo. The vidéo and song was a huge hit, making you and the other girls win an award for it.

Since your debut, you were alway on a rush and stressed, but you never showed it to anybody, cause you were the leader and no one had to see you in a desperate stage, except your boyfriend ; Seung Hyun. 

As much as you wished he never saw you like this, that’s how you first met. It was during your choreo training for your third music vidéo, you stayed until midnight at the studio to work on some moves that you missed or felt like you needed more practice and also because you needed to evacuate some feeling. You boyfriend, a guy from another group who debuted before you just dumped you this afternoon, by text. Since he’s a famous singer now, he didn’t have time for you, but you also know that the real reason it’s because he probably found someone else. You noticed how distant he was the last months and how less you talked in your day even if it was only messages. And when you were together, he was always on his phone and way less cuddly with you.

So that night, when you missed a step and fell on the ground you just exploded, letting go of your emotions as you cried alone in the studio.

That’s when he found you. He was on his way to leave to go back home but was anxious to hear someone cry. When you saw him in the studio, asking you if everything was okay, you wiped your tears and said it was fine, even if you were not. You didn’t recognize him at first, too tired to care anyway.

He invited you for a drink and you agreed. With a little bit of alcohol you explained what happened and he listened to you. He even drove you back home and paid for the drinks. 

The next morning, you were early at the studio, still tired and a little bit hungover from last night. The girls asked you about what happened for you to come back so late and you explained everything when you were on your training break. That’s when you met him again. He entered the studio and came to you under the eyes full of admiration of the other girls. He gave you a bottle of water and a Sandwich.

«-You seem to be like Ji Yong. A great Leader, really devoted to his work who keeps a lot of things inside and gives a lot of himself in everything, but he often forgets himself and his basic needs, like eating. So, please don’t forget it and get a good night of sleep. It’s for your own good. »

You were Speechless but thanked him. That’s when it hit. You recognize him, he was the rapper from the famous group of YG ; TOP from Big Bang. At first you felt Stupid to not have recognized him and embarrassed of how he saw you last night.

The next day, after a good night of sleep, you stopped by a coffee shop to bring him a little something and that’s how, slowly you started to develop feelings for each other. Seung Hyun was older than You but you didn’t care, he was a nice guy who truly cared about you and openly showed it and so you did. 

And that’s how you found yourself there. Valentine's Day was soon and Seung Hyun and you dated for  six months already. Everything felt like a dream even if you didn’t have a lot of time for the two of you. But this morning, when you received a text from him, everything felt different. 

‘’ - I have a surprise for you this weekend, gonna pick you up at 5 Pm. Get ready for three days and pack something cold. ‘’

This weekend, it's going to be Valentine's day and  Valentine's Day says couple activity and couple activity mean Romance and normally romance and couple activity lead to sex, which you didn’t want to. You never liked it, you only did it with you ex cause he didn’t give you a choice, mostly. It was more like we have to do it cause we are a couple and you feared he could cheat you. If You refused cause he already said it when he started to get famous. So as much as you want to have more time with Seung Hyun, it also freaks the shit out of you.

‘’ - Can We ? I’m not sure our managers will approve if we leave for that long.’’ ‘’ - No worries, I already setted up everything. And trust me, you definitely need those days off ‘’ ‘’ - Yeah, I Guess. I’m just worry for my group ‘’ ‘’ - Do you prefer to do something else ? I don’t want to force you to do anything, he just wanted to do something special for the weekend, but if you prefer something after work I can organize it. ‘’

You felt bad for a moment and got more anxious. 

‘’ - No it’s fine, I’m just… you know, I’m the leader after all, I have to make everything perfect.’’ ‘’ - And that’s why you need some days off, my love. Trust me on that, you will enjoy it.’’ ‘’ -Oh I Trust you, I’m sorry.’’ ‘’ - Don’t it’s fine ;) So, Friday at 5 Pm ? ‘’ ‘’ - Yeah, can’t wait ‘’

[lillaydee]

Naiveté - My Pompous Sister-Cousin Ruined My Life

Joel Miller (AU) / F Reader

Someone went online to rant about her bad luck.

Inspired by @jolapeno's epistolary dear-uary challenge.

WARNINGS: Angst, Joel is Bad at Feelings (The Last of Us), Joel is a Fucking Idiot. Joel is a Clueless Idiot

Divider by the fabulous @saradika

WORD COUNT: 3510

MASTER LIST

1. Dear Aunt Prue

*******************************************

Section: Rant

Posted by: ScornedSister1234

My Pompous Sister-Cousin Ruined My Life.

I need to get this out. I literally have no one to talk to about this. I have suffered in silence for 30 years. Well, no more. Strap in people, this will be a long one.

I (F35) grew up with my cousin L (F35). Her parents died and mine took her in. The day before they brought her home, my Mom sat me down and told me I needed to be nice to L. She has no one but us. Being 5, I was just excited to have a sister. She moved in, and we became best friends. Practically sisters. We even introduced ourselves as sisters. We did everything together. Literally inseparable.

School started, and as we grew older it became clearer L was nothing like me. She didn’t like to play or have fun. All she wanted to do was read and study. My friends made fun of her, called her all sorts of names, and when they found out we lived together, they made fun of me too. I had to bear the shame of having such a nerdy sister for so long. I tried to get her to join my friends and I, but she was never interested.

One good thing I’ll say about L is that she knows her place. She helped my Mom around the house and was very quick to offer her services whenever needed. I had no problems with this, until my Mom started saying I should be more helpful too, like L. I got in trouble just because I didn’t do the things she did. My Mom started a household chore chart, but I hated doing them. L didn’t want me to get in trouble, so she did them for me. She was found out, and I got in trouble anyway. You would be hard-pressed to believe she wasn’t the golden child.

I remember when I got my first make up set, we put some on each other’s faces for fun, but she quickly wiped it off hers. She said they made her face itchy. By dinnertime, her face had swollen up like a balloon and was red raw from her scratching. My parents panicked and took her to the hospital. The doctor kept asking her what she put on her face and she kept saying she didn’t put anything on it. They kept her in the hospital that night, doing tests on her, trying to find out what she was allergic to. When the results came out, I got in trouble for putting make-up on her. How was I supposed to know she was allergic? I was 12! And hello, she put some on my face too!

Every time there was a test, she would ace hers. I managed to scrape by, but whenever my parents saw her results they would hug her and treat her to something special. Of course, I didn’t get anything, but Miss Prissy Goody Two Shoes would always beg my parents to get something for me too. And my parents loved her for it. Golden hearted L. What a good girl. I should be more like her.

When she got a full scholarship to Harvard, my Dad acted like she was about to discover the cure for cancer or something. My Mom burst into tears and told her how much her parents would have been proud of her. God. It’s been years. Give it up already. They died years ago. Still dead, last I checked - no matter how many times you mention them. Newsflash Mom, dead people can’t be proud. They don’t feel anything! See? You don’t need to be a doctor to know that! It’s so frustrating! She was put on a pedestal. And I was sick and tired of it.

Do I say any of these things to her? No! Cause she’s an orphan, we mustn’t be mean to her. Cause she’s perfect, but poor her, she’s got no one. We should treat her nice. I did it all, even if my heart was screaming.

She went off to college and came home every few weeks – we lived an hour away. I have to say, I loved not having her around. I thought it was finally peaceful around the house. No perfect Miss L to show me up. But then, my parents made me get a job. I had to get the first job I could get, making pennies. My parents refused to help me buy anything anymore. I’m a grown up now, they told me. I had to find my own way.

When Nell came home for a break, she brought shiny new gadgets with her. She even had the latest iPhone, an iPad and even a MacBook. I was seething. How could my parents buy her those things and not me? Turns out, they didn’t.

It was then I found out. She had a generous trust fund. Her paternal Grandparents were very wealthy, and they set up a trust for her before they died. She never had to worry about starting her life once she graduated. She had money at the ready for a house, a car, tuition - which she did not need to use, living expenses, while I had to work 9 hours a day at a dead end job, scraping by, even while still living with my parents. Why don’t I have access to the same generous trust, you ask? Ah... we’re maternal cousins, and unfortunately, our shared Grandparents didn’t have two pennies to rub together.  

I tried to reason with my parents that she should give us some of the money, since they took her in. Apparently, the trust had been paying for her expenses since her parents passed. No wonder she had every opportunity at her feet. I could be where she is too if I had the money. My parents told me that the trust doesn’t give her the money, they get sent a receipt or something, I don’t really understand, and they reimburse her. You would think she would share the wealth, but no… she kept it all to herself, the self-important bitch. It would break the rules of the trust, my Mom said, and Prissy Miss L could never break the rule. Never mind that the person who had to give up her life as a single child was taking the bus to work and counting pennies every month.

It was humiliating. I was left alone, looking like a loser with no prospects, while she was flying high, well on her way to be a doctor. She was all everyone could talk about. My friends from high school, the very ones who used to make fun of her, began looking up to her. Suddenly this nerd they used to laugh at was an admirable person. People began telling their children to look to L. Be like L.

L, L, L, L, L.

But… she’s still my sister. So I kept it all bottled up inside. I had to accept the truth. She is the kindest, most sincere, most empathetic person I know. And despite my annoyance of her perfection, she is my best friend in the whole wide world, and I love her. She is perfect, even I had to admit that. In all areas, save for one.

Just because she’s smart and kind, doesn’t mean she’s very… socially aware. She seems to be very confused when it comes to men. She couldn’t seem to grasp that she, as a woman, is lacking. She’s too career oriented, too bookish, too proper.

Too boring.

The men she fell for has been, so far, way out of her league. Not to be mean, but she’s plain and dowdy. No way they would want her. I tried to warn her, get her to take better care of herself, so she would have a chance. But she never listens. Men after men after men. I tried to talk her up to these men, but they always ended up falling for me instead. It broke my heart to break it to her, but the heart wants what it wants, and before you guys go for me, let me tell you this - she always seemed to be okay with it.

How do I know she was okay with it? Because she introduced me to my husband, E (M38). He’s a heart surgeon at the hospital she works at. He’s very sweet, treated me well and took very good care of me. He proposed after only a year of dating, and we had an amazing marriage. He took me places I’d never even dreamed of, I finally got to go places, he bought me nice things, moved me into his amazing house, it was a dream. I didn’t even have to lift a finger. He hired someone to do it all, just so I could rest and be pampered the way I deserve. He called me his princess and showered me with gifts and basically gave me the world.

A few months ago, I decided to visit L. She’s a successful surgeon now, always working. I don’t get to see her as often as I’d like. When I arrived, her neighbour, J (M36), was fixing her faucet. He was a very good looking man. And I could tell immediately she’s into him. I can’t believe it. She’s doing it again. She’s going after a man who is way out of her league. This man is a man’s man… a manly man. He should be worshipped and treated like the king that he is. And L? She was far too busy and career-oriented to give him what he needed. I could only shake my head at her blindness. Poor L. Always wanting something she couldn’t have. But what could I do? She never learns.

A month later, I caught my husband kissing the widower next door. It was disgusting. I filed for divorce and immediately left the house. I had nowhere to go, so I went to L’s. She had the space, and it wasn’t as if she was always home anyway. We had moved a few hours flight away from our parents by then. She listened to me as I cried and told me I could stay for as long as I needed.

Because she was so busy, I spent a lot of time with J. He’s a good listener and was always willing to help. We fell for each other. It was inevitable. But my husband was delaying the divorce. He refused to even sign the papers. So J and I kept our love for each other quiet. Guys he’s the perfect man. He never hesitated to come lend a hand and ear, and most important of all, a shoulder to cry on. He’s so understanding, so empathetic, he’s just… perfect. I don’t think I have ever been in love like that before. I couldn’t wait to spend the rest of my life with J.  

About a month ago, after 2 months of being in denial and fighting the divorce, E finally signed the papers. I was so happy. It means J and I could make our relationship public. We could finally be a real couple. I saw him get some flowers delivered, I knew he was planning something for us that night. So I got all dressed up for a night out and just before we left for the date, J finally kissed me. It was the perfect kiss. I felt like I was soaring on cloud nine.

Here’s where everything went wrong. L saw the kiss and suddenly got all heartbroken about it. She went inside, packed a bag and left, and no one has heard from her since. And the sad thing? She was all dressed up! For some odd reason, she thought J was taking HER out! And then had the audacity to get all butthurt when she misunderstood?

It wouldn’t have been a problem – it’s not my fault she had deluded herself into an imaginary date with J. Except, J, the sweet, soft, kind-hearted soul that he is, felt sorry for her, and tried to coax her instead. He went into her house and followed her around as she packed her bag, telling her that we just fell in love. It just happened, that he didn’t do it to hurt her. L kept quiet and just left. He then told me he shouldn’t have kissed me in L’s presence, that he had always known that L had an unrequited crush on him, and that he needed time to figure out what to do about L, to let her down gently. He needed to, they live next door to each other. It would be weird for me to move in with him with her being all heartbroken next door. So we have put everything on pause since then, so that L could come to terms with reality better.

But ever since L left, J changed. To this day, he mopes around, waiting on his porch for her to come back, calling and texting her over and over. He went to all the neighbours asking if they had heard from her, even going so far as going to the hospital she works at and waited for her there in his free time, leaving me hanging.

And I don’t know how, but E and my parents found out about what happened, and shockingly, they took L’s side. I tried to explain that whatever they had heard were lies, but they hung up on me. They refused to take my calls, and J was a shell of the person that he was. He refused to pick up where we left off, too worried about what L would do if we did.

So now, I am still living at L’s, and I have nothing. E cut off any access I had to his accounts, and because of the prenup, I would be getting nothing in the divorce. My parents had blocked me, and I have no money to go home. My friends have deserted me, too worried about betraying E despite what he did. L has, so far, still granted me access to her delivery account, so I will at least be able to eat, but I don’t know how long I have before she cuts me off too.

I cannot believe she would do this to me. I cannot believe she would make this about her. I cannot believe she would paint herself as the victim, when it was her delusions that made her all heartbroken, taking everyone I care about with her. After 30 years living as sisters. My parents took her in when she had no one, and I was always nice to her. And this is how she repays me?

I don’t know where I will go from here, I don’t know how I am going to survive. I begged E to help me, but he kept blocking me everywhere. God knows how long I will have access to this phone, he might take my name out of his plan too. I don’t know what to do. I feel so alone.

-17,092 hearts

Top Comments:

User08356

Waah waah waah… me… me… me… God, do you even hear yourself woman?

DandyLion

Oh My God. I don’t have to meet this woman to know I don’t like her. She just happens to end up with all the guys L liked? And just happened to find her husband kissing the widower next door after meeting J? Sure, ScornedSister1234, the stupidest of us believe you.

KittyLady

I have never had the urge to hammer some common sense into someone’s head so much. Except the common sense might come in the shape of hot, molten lava.

User28574

Lady, go sell your stupid somewhere else. We’re all stocked up here.

UnmentionedDaughter

To all the commenters, listen up. I am J’s daughter. That’s right. J has a daughter. Did ScornedSister1234 forget to mention me? Oh, that’s right. She doesn’t even know my actual name, despite being told so many times. She claimed to be so in love with my Dad, who by the way, is not into her AT ALL, yet, forgot to mention that he has a teenage daughter. Also, she had not so subtly suggested for my Dad to send me to live on my uncle’s ranch so that he didn’t have to worry about taking care of me. Subtle, NELL. As if he would ever. He didn’t dump me when my egg-donor left, he would never do that now. He’s a father first, and if you had actually tried to get your vapid head out of your ass, you would realize that.

I was really going to keep quiet, but she smeared my favourite person apart from my Dad, uncle and aunt to the world. So I am not holding back.

FYI, you can listen to L’s version of the story here – skip to 32:44, the Dear Aunt Prue section.

This woman is straight up lying. My Dad is not into her. He’s just a kind man who doesn’t know how to say NO (I know, I gave him a hard time about it, don't worry). This man will help just about anyone, even a deranged woman like Nell. And that day he had flowers delivered? He was taking L out for dinner. It was her birthday. Not this deranged woman. L.

L is the woman my Dad is crazy about. He’s been in love with her ever since the day we moved in. And that kiss she mentioned? He didn’t kiss her. She attacked him – just surged and kissed him. He pushed her away immediately by the way, and I swear I could see him almost gag. How do I know this? Because my Dad was standing not even two steps in front of me, all ready to take L out, and this shameless woman came over all dressed up, asking my Dad to take her out to celebrate her divorce instead.

If you listen to L’s version, you will find out that Nell has been stealing men from under L all their lives (seriously, go listen to it). And reading this, I now know why. She’s just a bitter nobody who is angry the little girl her family took in, the one who supposedly had nothing and no one is doing so much better in life than she is. And here she is, badmouthing L (who is the loveliest, coolest person EVER by the way) while still LIVING IN HER HOUSE, feeding herself with L’s delivery account! Oh, and you’d think she’d be eating on the cheap, right? Nope. I saw a man deliver from a freaking steakhouse last night! Shameless much, Nell?

Oh, and if you’re worried about money, how about you come out of L’s house, live in the real world and get a job!

L, if you read this, please call Dad. He’s miserable without you. I miss you. Dad misses you. Please, L, come back. Give him a chance to explain. Please. I’m begging you.

Edit: Oh my God ladies! Stop asking for my Dad’s number! He wants L! No one else! Sheesh!

MrsDrJr

NELL, it’s me, your neighbour? Your ex-friend? I’m here to set things straight about E and the widower next door.

That widower is an 83 year old woman with dementia. She gets confused sometimes and thinks every kind man around her is her late husband. These men, most of whom are doctors, give her a small peck on the cheek sometimes when she gets confused to appease her, hold her hand and take her on walks around her garden every now and again. Nell knows this. Everyone knows this. So no, she didn’t leave her husband because he was cheating. After listening to the section at the link UnmentionedDaughter provided, coupled with the fact that she couldn’t stop yapping about her sister’s hot contractor neighbour since that day she visited, I am convinced she just left dear, kind, hardworking E for J just because she could see L liked him, and that it was reciprocated.

By the way, I also know L, I met her at some work/charity events a few times, as well as the hospital's Christmas parties. UnmentionedDaughter is right, L really is everything she mentioned and oh-so-badass. She’s the woman I want my daughters to grow up to be. She saved my daughter’s life, so I and all of my family and friends would go scorched earth to defend L. So yeah, stop with the lies, and lay on the bed you made, NELL.

User94587

Hey, I saw this post going viral, but there’s nothing here? Can someone tell me where I can get the content?

User17345

She deleted it. Got so much flak and hatred. Dumbo thought people would actually side with her. SMH.

User08966

God, I came back here to see if there’s an update. What a mess. Did UnmentionedDaughter ever update? Did J and L get together?

---

3. ?????

[badomenslullaby]

Chapter One

Paring: Noah x Fem reader Rating: 18+ Minors DNI Abstract: In a kingdom on the brink of upheaval, Princess Lilith is thrust into power far sooner than she ever imagined when her father suddenly falls gravely ill. With a sword in her hand and a mind sharper than any blade, she navigates treacherous waters: politics and royal expectations. Ensuring her kingdom's security, she is forced to go through a political marriage with the ruthless Lord Cassius; a union at an unbearable price. Yet in the shadows stands Noah, her devoted knight, and forbidden love. He is her unspoken promise, the man willing to sacrifice honor, life—everything—for her safety and happiness. As they fight against the chains of the lives the world has imposed upon them, they are faced with decisions about whether or not love will be able to bear the pressure of duty, deception, and the ever-present threats of those who

MasterList

“I will dispose of him for you,” Noah says, kneeling before her.

His hands are rough yet gentle as they clasp hers. He’s always gentle with her. 

“Your Highness, My love, please… it is of little consequence to me. I would rot in prison if you asked me to.”

Noah is not above begging, even though he knows he’s been reduced to this. He can’t bear the thought of her marrying that man. With her father's sudden illness, the Kingdom of Aeloria, now crowned by its young queen, had been thrown into turmoil. She deserved so much more than this fate. Noah, her knight, would give everything and anything to ensure she received nothing less than the best.

As her lover, he only wants her.

“That man will drag you down with him. He frequents brothels and has not an ounce of loyalty in him. He’d make you appear incompetent.” 

He has had this Lord Cassius followed around long enough to know all about his less-than-savory tendencies. A marriage to the son of the duchess with the largest territory in the empire would do her good. It would strengthen her claim and solidify her position on the throne. But Noah knows that, no matter how strategically advantageous such a union may be, a vile man is no match for her.

He's never been naive enough to dream that he himself would ever marry her. Noah, a former street urchin who was knighted, owes his position in life to the pity she showed him on that rainy day. But to her, he is nothing more than her loyal shadow, her secret, something hidden behind closed doors. He'll never be more.

She still needs to marry someone who will bend to her every whim, someone easy to manipulate and control. Why her parents, King Aldric, and Queen Seraphine, want her to marry that heathen, Cassius (whose name alone disgusts him) is beyond Noah. The extra allegiance may be useful, yes, but at what cost? Surely, she'd only look a fool marrying a man who openly consorts with other women. Noah can’t let that happen.

She must have so much on her mind, Noah thinks. Her younger brother, Prince Emyr, was sent to marry the tyrant of another empire, and now she’s being forced to take the throne far sooner than she ever expected. He wants nothing more than to lighten her burden. He would do anything, kill anyone, to make her life even a little bit easier.

Lilith gives him a sad smile. She hated to see him begging. She gently takes his fingers and kisses them. His face softens, though he looks no less determined as she does so.

“Your father…he should not have put you in this position,” he says bitterly, the words like bitter poison in his mouth.

It’s treason to speak ill against his king, and it could get him killed, yet Noah has to bite his tongue to stop himself from being even harsher with his words. It’s the only thing he can do if he must, to prevent his lover from being married off to someone she will despise. Despise him.

"Noah, I could never bear to see you in prison," she said, her voice quiet but unwavering. "I don’t know what I would do without you by my side."

His eyes close, and he lets out a tired breath. “You’d manage, Your Highness. Perhaps you’d find someone who suited your position better.”

The words hurt to say. His fingers caress her hand before he dips his head and presses his lips to the back of them. “I do not wish to decide for you, Lilith. I only wish to see you in an arrangement more suitable to you.”

That Cassius man is not worthy to be on his knees before Lilith, nor his lips upon her knuckles. Noah hates it.

She lets out a sad sigh, her gaze dropping for a moment. "You know how I feel… I hate the thought of marrying someone who isn’t you."

A spark of hope in the back of his mind makes his lips part, to say something, when he hears one of her guards coming up the hall. Quickly, he lets go of her hand, stands, and bows his head. The guard doesn’t spare him a glance. Lilith’s good reputation keeps her from having to deal with any unsavory gossip, despite Noah’s late-night visits. They’ve been so careful.

Once the guard has passed, Noah’s eyes meet hers, and her hands. “I understand, Your Highne—” He stops. “Lilith.”

She gives him a small smile and slightly chuckles. She always finds it cute when he catches himself calling her by title and not by name.

Your chambers?" he says, a small smile on his face. The expression is different from hers, a little darker.

He is already thinking of what he'll do to her once they're behind closed doors, how he'll lose himself in her and let everything else fade away. Just for a little while, he wants to forget.

Forget the impending threat of Cassius.

Lilith meets his gaze, her voice is soft. "Please… lead the way."

He gives her his arm and leads her to her chambers. The guards give him the same disinterested looks as they pass. Once inside he can’t help himself: her lips are too soft and too sweet. His arms go around her and he holds her in a firm embrace and kisses her.

She gently cups his face in her hands, her touch warm and steady. Then, without hesitation, she kisses him—deeply, desperately. It’s a kiss filled with sadness, anxiety, and love, all tangled together in a way only they could understand.

They move to the bed, and he gently lays her down, his touch both careful and certain. He stays beside her, his lips lingering just above hers before pulling away just enough to speak.

"Let me take care of everything," he murmurs, his voice low and full of promise. "I can make your situation more desirable."

Before she can respond, his mouth finds her jaw, then her neck, trailing slowly, reverent kisses as if he’s committing every inch of her to memory.

"He won’t be a problem much longer," he murmurs, his breath warm against her skin as his fingers work at the buttons of her dress. His kisses are slow and firm, each one laced with unspoken promises. He moves with practiced ease, half the buttons undone when a sudden, urgent knocking shatters the moment. Rapid and insistent.

In one swift, instinctive movement, Lilith and Noah pull away from each other. She hastily readjusts her dress, smoothing it out as she sits upright on the bed, her composure returned. Noah, sensing the shift, crosses the room and positions himself, standing guard with his back to the door.

"Come in," Lilith says, her voice calm yet carrying authority.

Two of Cassius' guards enter the room, but the Lord himself is noticeably absent, much to Noah's obvious annoyance. They bow low and Lilith gestures for them to rise.

"Excuse the interruption, Your Highness," one of them says, his voice respectful but with regret. "We have had to confine your betrothed to his quarters; he was found drunk with not one, but two women. We are at a loss with what to do about this situation, and I deeply apologize."

Lilith rubs her face, her fingers pressing against her forehead as if trying to push away the weight of the situation. She’s lost for words, a moment of stunned silence hanging in the air as she processes the news.

The guards exchange nervous glances, the weight of what they have to say hovering over them like a cloud. After a brief pause, the first one hesitates before speaking again, his voice even more strained.

"There is more, Your Highness," he says, his gaze lowered. "The women are with child. We know not what to do, especially in light of your engagement to Lord Cassius, set for two turns of the moon."

"With... his child?" Lilith’s voice trembles slightly, a mix of disbelief and rising anger. "Both of them?"

Both of them. Yes, Your Highness," the guard replies, his tone regretful. "We would not have believed it if not for the doctors and midwives who confirmed it. What would you have us do? The… ladies of the night… are adamant about being taken care of, and Lord Cassius was quite insistent on not doing that."

Noah stands in the background, his jaw clenched tight, his hands clamped down on the hilt of his sword. He's doing the best he can to not look too satisfied, though a flicker of something dark crosses his face.

Lilith takes a deep breath, her eyes steady as she processes the news. "For the ladies," she says calmly but firmly, "No woman should have to go without proper medical attention during these months. The situation may be regrettable, but the gift of life is always beautiful. I won't allow them to stay in the castle, but I still want to make sure they have a safe place. See to it, please."

The guards bow and exit, the door clicking shut behind them. As the silence settles, Noah lets out a low laugh, the sound rich with satisfaction. 

“Good,” he says, his voice tinged with amusement. “I was beginning to fear you’d have to marry him.”

Lilith's gaze narrows, eyes pinning to him. "You did this. How?" There is both curiosity and a hint of suspicion in her voice. He is standing too pleased for her taste.

Noah walks toward her, his steps measured, and kneels before her, taking her hands gently in his. He presses a soft kiss to her knuckles, his lips lingering for just a moment.

 "Nothing is ever for free," he says with a knowing smile. "But I can tell you one thing, my coin was well spent."

Lilith rolls her eyes, but she can’t hide the smile that tugs at her lips. She reaches out, her fingers brushing his cheek as she gently caresses his face, her thumb tracing soft circles.

 "You, Sir Knight," she says with a teasing tone, "are one tricky cat."

She giggles softly, her lips curving into a playful smile before she leans in and gives him a soft, sensual kiss, the warmth of the moment lingering between them.

He leans into her, gently pressing her down onto the bed as his hands work with urgency, starting to work her out of her dress. The feel of her warm skin and the intoxicating scent of lavender overwhelmed his senses. Every touch was a silent declaration, that he loved her, and was consumed by desire for her. The thought that she might one day marry another was a torment that made him ache with a fierce longing never to let her go.

Her soft sounds, the quiet moans escaping her lips, ignite something deep within him, a fire that burns brighter with every breath.

If only she weren’t forbidden fruit. Noah desires nothing more than to marry her, that they be on even ground in all aspects, and she doesn't have obligations and responsibilities that keep her beyond him. Maybe in another world, in another life…

"Lilith," he murmurs, lips grazing from hers down her jaw, down the side of her neck, farther down to heaving breasts.

"I live and breathe for you alone."

"I cannot ask you to live and breathe for me alone," she says softly, her voice filled with both love and sorrow. "You deserve to live for yourself. But know this; my heart beats with yours, and I will carry you with me in every step I take. Our love may be forbidden, but it will never be forgotten."

“I could live forever hearing those words from your lips,” he whispers, with each word being a vow. He will spend every moment of his life ensuring she gets the praise and affection she deserves.

His lips trail further down her chest, pressing soft, light kisses to her collarbones, her shoulders, and along her arms. He’s determined to kiss every inch of her body, every piece of her body that's his, if but to show how deeply he loves her. And he must.

Her heart races as she feels his soft kisses, the weight of his devotion sinking deep into her chest. She lays a hand on his face, guiding him to look up at her. 

"You are my protector, my knight," she whispers, her voice filled with tenderness. "But you must remember, your life is bound to me only by duty, not by choice. And yet, here you are, choosing me despite the consequences. I could not ask for more, and I can only hope that in this love we share, you will never lose yourself.”

Her words melt every fiber of his being, much as they had when he first swore himself to her the day they met, much as they did when they confessed their love. Noah can only stare at her, helpless, his lips parted in awe.

“My only duty is to you, always," he whispers, a devoted tone in his voice. He holds her face between both hands, pulling her close for another kiss. 

"I will worship you however you demand it," he purrs softly with reverence. "For you are my Goddess.”

Her heart swells at his words, but she feels the weight of the responsibility she carries. She cups his face gently, her fingers brushing his skin with a tenderness that combines affection and quiet strength.

“I do not ask to be worshiped Noah,” she whispers, her gaze delving into his. “I am a woman, flesh, and blood, bound by the same fears and longing as anyone else. But your loyalty Your heart. They are everything to me.” She presses a kiss to his forehead, her love for him evident. “And for you, I'd stand against heaven itself.”

Noah feels like his heart will burst in her grasp. She’s so beautiful, so kind, so perfect. His eyes shine with love and worship. He nuzzles into her hand, shutting his eyes in adoration.

He’s the luckiest man in the world to be able to love her; he wouldn't trade it for anything. His hands gently caress her legs as they lay there together, and in this moment, there's nothing he desires more than to please her.

“Please,” he whispers, his voice soft yet filled with longing. “Allow me to stay the night?”

She smiles at him, her eyes filled with warmth, before leaning in to kiss him gently.

"You may stay the night," she says softly, her voice barely above a whisper, filled with devoted affection.

[notacatdown]

yes and no. they definitely shouldve had one, but how things flow in the drama (i didnt read the novel so feel free to educate me!), between all that happens in ep 7 and ep 8, it almost felt like there was no time for that to happen. if anything, maybe instead of his percent going up from being jealous of seeing her with fuyi, they couldve done something there, but the version of ziqi theyre trying to portray is one who is already beginning to like her romantically, skipping over the friendship part and just wanting to Be Together. like a desperate lovesick puppy

I figure ep 9 is a better place to respond than your ep 4 rewatch because it's here that Miaomiao says Mu Sheng should go see a therapist. The drama keeps a lot of the novel's dialogue about how Mu Sheng sees himself (he's tired of his life, he thinks that his death is the ideal solution to everything, he believes that his only purpose in life is to protect Mu Yao, etc), but it doesn't go into detail. How does a person with such deep loathing for himself and suicidal tendencies behave?

In the novel, the moment when he realizes how much he wants her affection and her warmth, he instinctively wants to kill that desire for self-protection. He believes that he's a monster and only a saint like Mu Yao will care about him. He fears rejection and believes that it's inevitable, so he wants to get rid of her. But at the same time, he really wants her attention and gets upset when she ignores him. The more he likes her, the more he gets scared of what he thinks will happen. He doesn't have the sense of security to want to enter a romantic relationship yet.

(Whereas in ep 8, it seems as if Miaomiao had said she likes him instead of saying she cares about him because she's his disciple, he wouldn't try to send her away. His fear is that she will reveal his secret to Mu Yao.)

He hates himself, so he keep sabotaging his relationships. He has to believe he's deserving of love and friendship to stop pushing her away. And even then, healthy behavior isn't the absence of bad behavior. It's a completely new set of behavior that happy people learn from their interactions with parents as children. For a person like Mu Sheng, who didn't come from a happy family, he has to learn it as an adult from Miaomiao.

We can sort of see this in the drama too when Mu Sheng says he doesn't like to argue with Mu Yao in ep 4. 

I really like how you phrased his mindset in that moment "placating her and telling her he doesn't like arguing with her, that sister knows best, just because he can't deal with hearing her say these hurtful things anymore, and he cant handle it if his sister has such a negative view of him, all while hes trying to smile. its genuinely hurting him internally, as we see in a moment. "

In the novel scenes where he thinks/says those lines, he's innocent of what Mu Yao is accusing him of even though it looks incriminating. Mu Yao gives him time to explain, but he doesn't want to. He wants the conversation to end as fast as possible. As the readers, we can see that this sort of misunderstanding has happened so many times in the past and shaped Mu Yao's view of him, but she still asks him. She desperately wants him to be innocent, but he's so stuck in his negative emotions that he can't see this.

"if you think it was me, then it was me." This new line and his expression when he says this is so perfect for how Mu Sheng views himself in the novel. His self-esteem is a house of cards shakily propped up by how Mu Yao and Miaomiao view him. He places Mu Yao and Miaomiao on a pedestal, and I like how the novel shows this places an unfair burden on Mu Yao and Miaomiao. I don't think this aspect is shown in the drama.

Anyways, I like that we get to see a different take on their relationship in the drama. I just wish the drama spent more time on it, especially their relationship as fan/reader and author.

—

since mu sheng is xia ziqi's self-insert, who does that make yao (not that she has to be a specific someone, i just mean does she stem from somewhere)? 

I viewed it as this is how a teenage boy would write an empowered woman. Except for a few scenes closely adapted from the novel, she doesn't have emotional fragility. I love that scene where Mu Yao is the only one not affected by the water demon's deepest fear trap, so its not that I want her changed. More like, it would be interesting to see her change. For example, if she had rethought her view on what a hero should be like after meeting Guo Xiu.

On a side note, that Mu Sheng would say he's not a member of the Mu clan and only Mu Yao's brother would imply he was treated badly. Do Mu Yao and Mu Sheng ever talk about this in the drama?

In the novel, Fu Zhou is a female author, has no connection to Mu Sheng, and the story is not a dream. So, the characters that a teenage boy writes would be different from the characters that a woman would write. It would have been interesting to see the female protagonists that Fu Zhou writes as an adult. I'm curious how Fu Zhou would portray Mu Yao in his revised version. I think she would be more nuanced.

The drama removes three female characters (Lin Yu's aunt, Mu Yao's biological mother, and Mu Yao's father's legal wife) and adds four male characters and one female character (Cuicui, Guo Xiu, the marquis, Liu Fuyi's master, and Liu-niang). The novel's final mystery arc is female-centric. It can be viewed as a tale of four mothers, the sacrifices they've made, and how that shaped their children in a patriarchal society part 2. 

(Which sounds depressing, but it's being revealed during the happiest time in Mu Sheng and Mu Yao's lives. Their childhoods sucked, but they met people that love them and helped them walk out the shadows of their childhood, and their future will be so happy. I think this is why the author chose to reveal their parents' stories this way.)

Although I want to protest about screenwriters that change female-centric novels to focus on the male protagonist in xianxia drama adaptations, it wouldn't make sense that a teenage boy would write that type of story. He doesn't understand how women think or how motherhood changes and impacts women.

"again, i think miaomiao is disregarding that this is a parallel universe, since she just sees it as the book's world and everyone is pretend, so venting like this, especially to ziqi, is not something that she has to hesitate about. they dont understand, and they dont fully question her, so why not speak to them as if they arent real people? at this point in the series, thats still how she sees them."

When I rewatch the part where she's sharing her vulnerable thoughts to him, I wish we could have gotten a scene where they're themselves with their memories intact and continued this conversation. It would have been such a good resolution! We never get to see them on the same page. We find out that Catching Demons is like a love letter to Miaomiao, but Miaomiao doesn't know that. I feel like I went to a restaurant, patiently waited for the chef to cook, enjoyed tasting while waiting, and right after the splendid meal was about to be served, the restaurant closed and takeout wasn't allowed.

"i like that after 5 years of traveling together the name ziqi has not come up once."

Lol. Shows that Mu Sheng has no friends T.T Strangers would call him Mu-gongzi/Young Master Mu to be polite. Mu Yao and Liu Fuyi call him Ah'Sheng. His mom calls him Sheng'er. In the novel, Miaomiao is the only one that calls him by Mu Sheng or Ziqi. I like that the marquis refers to him as that Ziqi guy because that's how he hears Miaomiao's address for Mu Sheng. That was a nice detail.

and yes, miaomiao has clearly changed a lot in the story, yet with how she is supposed to escape, the system will still ensure that she gets through it similarly, since she HAS to defeat the resentful woman, so the story has to continue,

I keep forgetting the system gives her two goals in the drama. I think this is because we only see Miaomiao working on Mu Sheng's favorability % and Mu Yao and Liu Fuyi's relationship. Let me know if I'm wrong or if I miss something. In the novel, she works on finding out more about the final boss and increasing her fighting ability to prepare for the ending throughout the story.

—

When I was re-watching the drama, I noticed how the omission of very minor details changed how I view Miaomiao. For example, in the novel, when Mu Sheng sticks the immobilizing charm on her to snatch Liu Fuyi's sachet from her, MiaoMiao's first thought is on the charm, how cool and useful it is. She asks him for one. It shows that she cares more about the demon hunter world and planning for future dangers over Mu Sheng and his petty behavior.

but hes so annoyed LOL. using a control talisman because HE WANTS THAT DANG IT. no hesitation at ALL.

ahhhhhh looking at the sachet for a moment and then her as he goes to grab it. he wants to intimidate and tease her so badlyyyyyyy

Oh Mu Sheng, if only you kept this jealous behavior and ripped off the love bracelet. What was the point of testing the bracelet? He should have just yanked the bracelet off. It's like seeing people on fire and not wanting to get close to them to throw water over them because they're naked. In an emergency situation, there is an exemption for everyday politeness.

In a magical world where a single talisman can make someone execute a complicated action and one person has the power to alter the memories of an entire village for years on end, and there's no magical way to check, an experienced demon hunter like Mu Sheng should have basic safety protocols. If she isn't acting like herself, the first step should be to strip her down to make sure there's no hidden magical item and question her to pinpoint when their memory or behavior changed.

and how he looks surprised "its a sachet" / "doesnt it look like that?" my guy what skills do you possess besides being super hot? because idk i havent quite seen them

Lol. Is it clear in the drama that he's terrible because this is the first time he's made a protective sachet? In the novel, the first ones that he offers Miaomiao are three lumpy bags crammed with talismans. A protective sachet normally has ONE talisman. He stayed up after their 5-in-a-row games to make them. Gets rejected by Miaomiao. Later on, he forcefully gives her one that's just as nice as Liu Fuyi's. Presumably, he's been secretly working on perfecting his sachet making skills.

crossing his armmmmssss i LOVE how much he does that and how LITTLE fuyi does it. like absolute foils for each other. wait. are mu sheng and liu fuyi supposed to be two sides of ziqi? ive considered it but i dont know. blah, i dont want to talk about this right now, so many of you are much better at this than i am.

This would have been so interesting for the drama to explore! What does it mean that Fu Zhou had Mu Sheng marry Lin Yu (a woman that was in love with Liu Fuyi? Just a way to torture himself? I wish we got to see them interact more beyond that drinking their sorrows away scene.

Early on in the novel, Mu Sheng has a one-sided competition going on with Liu Fuyi. Liu Fuyi is oblivious to this. As he likes himself more, he does this less. By the final story arc, he doesn't react negatively when Liu Fuyi consoles him about something. He still gets jealous of Liu Fuyi, but he recognizes that it's his problem and that it isn't okay to act out his jealousy. Mu Sheng's precious character growth!

hes just so pretty, even blurred. AND SO IS YAO. mu siblings gorgeous genes even tho theyre not blood-related.

Pretty fan art of these three from xiaohongshu.

i find that on rewatch, i like cuicui less and less? i had no problem with him on my first watch, and he doesnt even do anything wrong. i think i just found it grating to go through his scenes again LOL. like goddammit just give me the romance and action!

My tipping point for Cuicui was ep 21. I wish we could have seen Miaomiao supporting Mu Sheng after he spits out blood during the battle scene instead of having to hold a 150-year old bamboo demon. It would make sense that CuiCui was stuck in his original form because of the pressure of the formation. His role is to help push them together, but he's always standing between them and literally keeping them apart. I can see why fans are so upset about his character on Weibo and Douban.

(Feel free to ignore this ranting. Got carried away. I get so annoyed whenever I think about this. 

Ep 23 was the final straw. I watch the drama at 2x speed in any scene he's in. In the novel, we have Miaomiao idly playing with Mu Sheng's hair and him getting super flustered. She handfeeds him her snacks or any food that she enjoys with him, but it has now become the exclusive-privilege of Cuicui.

In the last third of the novel, even when she's talking to someone else, she notices when Mu Sheng is sad. She has become as sensitive to him as he is to her. She reaches out to hold his hand when he sits down next to her. She half-hugs him and holds his hands to make dumplings. Just little moments.

Instead, we have this in the drama:

In ep 14, Mu Sheng walks away because he's upset and jealous. After a similar situation in the novel, MiaoMiao drank a bit to get courage and went to Mu Sheng's room to apologize for poking at his sore spot. She ends up drinking way too much. After she apologizes, she rambles on that she's worried about him. That he should like someone like her. That he would be happy with her. That she would pamper him. She kisses him on the cheek and then tries to wipe her rouge off his cheek. This is how Mu Sheng knows that Miaomiao likes him.

How did they go from this to needing a 10-year old child to progress their relationship? Cuicui spilling Miaomiao's crush to Mu Sheng even though she told him not to.)

Sorry, this got too long. I've never felt so frustrated by any drama character before. More than any other reason, Cuicui is the reason why I only re-watch up to ep 8. I was curious to read your thoughts on ep 9 because you've pointed out so many things I missed, so I continued. I can just scroll past the Cuicui parts.

THE STUNNED LOOK ON HIS FACE LMAO. hes like "what did i do? did i do something wrong?" but then hes thinking "she is way too upset about this. what is wrong with her?"

i think she also feels very, again, shy over this whole thing, because of the meaning of putting a ring on her finger in her world, and wants an excuse to get it off. which is why she asks for his demon staff. 

ziqi is so unserious. like not only does he not want to indulge in an emotional convo but he also has to pick on her and take personal offense.

miaomiao only taking fuyis hand. yeah thats on purpose.

say what youd like but i think he stares at her chest because he wants to confront her by looking at her face but cant, so he settles for that, then perhaps realizes that its inappropriate, so he looks back down. im just reading into things, thats what i do here.

Your observations are so fun to read! Would add a star to this drama's rating for it. Thank you for sharing!

lgief rewatch ep. 9

yay ep 9! lots of shy ziqi AND miaomiao moments~ thats basically most of what this episode is to me minus the few times miaomiao discusses her world/CD world and the novel storyline.

if youd like to discuss lgief, feel free to send me asks, chats, or reply to any of these posts.

ep 1 / ep 2 / ep 3 / ep 4 pre-festival / ep 4 festival / ep 5, 5 part 2 / ep 6 / ep 7 / ep 8 / ep 9

following up to the ending of ep 8, we see ziqi STILL HOLDING HER HAND after putting on the ring.

and when miaomiao rips her hand away, hes like "wtf?"

did they put rings on fingers back then for marriage (yes im too lazy to look it up, sue me)? regardless, this feels like, even if it is, ziqi is clueless regardless, because he has no romantic awareness.

he purses his lips because he feels like hes committed some faux pax, but he doesnt know what, so he has to ask. the way he asks is so gentle, he really wants to know ;_;

miaomiao doesnt wanna tell! i think she was truly feeling some attraction towards him in this moment, but shes shy, and if she tried to tell him, hed make fun of her, or he wouldnt get it.

THE STUNNED LOOK ON HIS FACE LMAO. hes like "what did i do? did i do something wrong?" but then hes thinking "she is way too upset about this. what is wrong with her?" and maybe he also, though this is just me making things up, felt some sort of jamais vu, perhaps.

cut to her feeling like shes just gotta drop it now because hes watching her and sent her here to practice.

he looks. so good.

LOL its so funny she says she doesnt think its as good as the ladle when it very clearly is. i think she just wanted to get out of training here.

the way that as SOON as she hears him take in a breath she says "dont call me stupid" and she can barely look him in the eye when she says that. hes so cute for obliging.

i think she also feels very, again, shy over this whole thing, because of the meaning of putting a ring on her finger in her world, and wants an excuse to get it off. which is why she asks for his demon staff. the way she shuffles over is so fucking funny. oh miaomiao, never change.

fully reblogged ver here

[cent-scratchnsniff]

reread tiphs dialog recently. i love them lots

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

very very tired of all the many many things :')

[mars-ipan]

god i cannot wait to be off these steroids…

[lazycrow12]

I have very many thoughts about epic!Calypso and her character and how she acts and why she acts that way and how her experience have shaped who she is

I also have thoughts about the ways she's treated in this fandom and how some of y'all attribute the actions of her book counter part and place them on her to justify hating her

I shall share these thoughts when I can. Hopefully soon

[sealeneee]

siiiiiiigh

[kavehayati]

I wish I could inject pasilyo into my brain so I can have permanent happiness