#get him a barber

[oz-moth]

The internet will never understand the absolute grip BrightGoats version of the Addisons has on me.

The pink fuckass one especially he seems like a pathetic little thing ngl

Also they made casino cups? What drug are they snorting to make them so talented?

Who's Ur plug.

[lord-squiggletits]

One of my favorite parts of phase 2 (and indeed one of the few moments I resonated with IDW Prowl) was when the neutrals were coming back to Cybertron and Prowl said that he refused to let Autobots be pushed aside and overruled after they were the ones who fought for freedom for 4 million years (the exact wording escapes me atm).

And I mean, that resentment still holds true even once the colonists come on bc like. As much as it's true that Cybertron's culture is fucked up, and as funny as it can be to paint Cybertronians as a bunch of weirdos who consider trying to kill someone as a common greeting not important enough to hold a grudge over.... The colonists POV kind of pissed me off a lot of times, as did the narrative tone/implications that Cybertronians are forever warlike and doomed to die by their own hands bc it just strikes me as an extremely judgemental and unsympathetic way to deal with a huge group of people with massive war PTSD and political/social tensions that were rampant even before the war?

Like, imagine living in a society rife with bigotry and discrimination where you get locked into certain occupations and social strata based on how you were born. The political tension is so bad there's a string of assassinations of politicians and leaders. The whole planet erupts into an outright war that leads (even unintentionally) to famine and chemical/biological warfare that destroys your planet. Both sides of the war are so entrenched in their pre-war sides and resentment for each other that this war lasts 4 million years and you don't even have a home planet any more. Then your home planet gets restored and a bunch of sheltered fucks come home and go "ewww why are you so violent?? You're a bunch of freaks just go live in the wilderness so that our home can belong to The Pure People Who Weren't Stupid And Evil Enough To Be Trapped In War" and then a bunch of colonists from places that know nothing about your history go "lol you people are so weird?? 🤣🤣 I don't get why y'all are fighting can't you just like, stop??? Oh okay you people are just fucked up and evil and stupid then" ((their planets are based on colonialism where their Primes wiped out the native populations btw whereas the Autobots and OP in particular fought to save organics. But that never gets brought up as a point in their favor)) as if the damage of a lifetime of war and a society that was broken even before the war can just magically go away now that the war is over.

Prowl fucking sucks but he was basically the only person that pointed out the injustice of that.

And then from then on out most of the characters from other colonies like Caminus and wherever else are going "i fucking hate you and your conflicts" w/ people like literal-nobody Slide and various Camiens getting to just sit there lecturing Optimus about how Cybertronians are too violent for their own good and how their conflicts are stupid, with only brief sympathetic moments where the Cybertronians get to be recognized as their own ppl who deserve sympathy before going right back to being lambasted.

Like I literally struggled to enjoy the story at multiple points because there was only so much I could take of the characters I knew and loved being raked over coals constantly while barely getting to defend themselves or be defended by the narrative so like. It was just fucking depressing and a little infuriating to read exRID/OP

[dynamitekansai]

[boggysbitch]

dan didn’t even ask to get elias laid he literally just wanted cold pillows and a haircut

[lovelybunnigum]

so happy the curly red hair with facial hair lucifer agenda is spreading, I haven't made a full actual design yet but have like an idea of it, he's basically that and I'm not alone LES GOOO also he's fat also idk how him being big would work cause like I was asking around hazbin discord servers (totally reliable source I know), asking people if he could change his body shape and if there was a limit to how long he could stay in other forms, and 2-3 people assumed he can stay in another body shape for as long as he wants, so based off that um I'm guessing if luci ever were to feel insecure about his weight gain hed just simply make himself skinny again so now I'm sad cus I probably cant make him thick MANNNN whatEVER ill make it so there's limits on how long he can stay in other forms I need to push the fat lucifer propaganda (this might change in the future but like as of right now I'm pretty adamant on having him be a big guy ((still short)))

ignore alastor i was having brainrot also i forgot lucifers red cheeks this is like the only thing I have of him that's presentable rn

[feyres-divorce-lawyer]

can you get mha fans to start a petition that will get this guy a goddamn barber

yea he nees a haircut doesn’t he😭

[mintaikk]

Alastor's Barber after seeing the most straighten, damaged hair ever known to man and demonkind

[firemenenthusiast]

THANK YOU ARCHIE FANGIRL GOD ‼️ I OWE YOU BIG TIME YOU’RE OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR IN TIMES OF DROUGHT AND DEPRIVATION 🙏🏻

[rainbowpufflez]

Fun fact gays I also have ocs that I need to draw more things for, here are the main 3 tho

First is Atlas, second is Polly, and third is Phil

They’re all demons and nothing bad happens to them at all, they’re so fine and normal (I’m lying)

These pieces are heavily based off of this song

[the-unconquered-queen]

You know how the artists went and updated Aerin's sprite for b2? Not just the clothes, but his actual features? Well, I think it would've been neat if they'd also updated his nose to be crooked or have a bump where MC broke it, but then I guess that possibly didn't happen in every playthrough, and in any case I fully support them prioritizing the poor little meow meow pout

[lord-squiggletits]

The thing about Prowl is I don't really think canon was ever trying to frame him as a "necessary evil" or anything along the lines of "he's a shitty person but his work was necessary" like mmm.... That feels very much like something Prowl wants to believe about himself, not something that's actually factually true in reality.

I can't really make a good argument about it because I only remember like a handful of standout Prowl Moments in IDW1 but like... Prowl dropping a bomb on a neutral city and blaming it on the Decepticons is not "a necessary evil," that's a war crime. Prowl trying to destroy the space bridge to Caminus to keep Starscream from getting power over it, dooming the entire planet and its inhabitants to extinction by starvation, is not "a necessary evil," it's a fucking war crime. I feel like trying to frame such drastic measures as him "doing the dirty work of the Autobots" feels way too much like an excuse for actions that actually aren't justifiable. Especially since Prowl himself is far from being the 100% rational guy he thinks he is, considering how often he bases his decisions on things like his anti-Decepticon bias and his general refusal to follow any orders that contradict what he thinks is The Right Thing To Do (TM).

But also I think this is kind of the fault of the narrative of IDW1, since very few Autobots besides Prowl are given the chance to actually be morally gray even when the worldbuilding implicates them in some very morally gray things. Like, for example, JRO adding in the existence of MTOs which implies that the normally squeaky-clean leader Optimus was willing to approve the creation of new soldiers just to throw them into combat (and even the attempts to humanize the MTOs by giving them "an education" were eventually cut down to nothing but combat optimizations). And there's also the fact that Optimus knows about the Wreckers and has been known to call them on missions at least once (Stormbringer), meaning he's very much aware of the Wreckers and their tactics and is willing to call them in for fights when it's necessary.

I don't think you need to use Prowl as a crutch to make the Autobots morally gray. I think the Autobot leadership (or at least, Optimus, since few people besides him or Prowl seem to have major tactical command over the army as a whole) is plenty morally gray enough on its own, because the nature of war is inherently morally gray no matter how righteous your cause is. Reducing the lives of your own people into numbers on maps, harvesting resources, bringing MTOs to life just to die in a war they practically have no stake in, those things are enough.

And tbh it kind of bothers me when people try to saddle Prowl with the "dirty work of the Autobots", not just because it frames Prowl's blatantly evil actions as some sort of savior act taking the blame from the rest of the Autobots (which isn't even accurate, because the blame for war crimes falls on the entire army as an institution rather than one person), but because it downplays the moral grayness of the Autobots and pretends that no Autobot BESIDES Prowl ever participated in morally gray actions, which simply isn't true.

TLDR: Prowl isn't as much of a hero as he thinks he is because committing atrocities in the name of your cause doesn't change the fact that they're atrocities (and may not have even been justified). However, painting Prowl as the "token evil teammate" of sorts also places too much blame for the atrocities of war on him in particular, when in reality that's a burden shared by Optimus Prime and any other members of the Autobot military command structure.

[mars-ipan]

i have a kfc 2pc combo on the way i have a kfc 2pc combo on the way yayayayayayayaya

[irregularbillcipher]

i had been considering making one of gus’ stories be an homage to sweeney todd since it’s arguably the most well-known penny dreadful— well, string of pearls is, but tomato tomato— but i was like “i dunno how to translate todd being a barber to a flatland profession” without realizing that the real flaw in that idea is that i have purposefully avoided any discussion of animals and decided nobody in that dimension eats meat

[gallawitchxx]

🖤 barber!mickey & (not so) shaggy!ian 🖤

here's the 37th installment for this week's @galladrabbles prompt: spoiled by @very-sleepy-head

catch up/read in full HERE -- updates weekly! [ read scenes one & two in their entirety ON AO3 ]

- - - - -

“So, you, uh, like tacos?” Ian asks and immediately regrets.

Mickey’s head snaps up, his expression still largely unreadable. “Sure,” he says, licking his lips. “Wouldn’t trust a guy who doesn’t.”

He smirks, and the sea foaming within Ian catches fire.

They’re no longer touching, just standing awkwardly in the middle of the sidewalk, so Ian takes a tentative step forward, watching as Mickey mirrors his movements.

“What’s your go-to?”

“Steak. You?”

Ian thinks about it. “Al Pastor.”

Mickey makes a face like he’s smelled spoiled milk. “That shit with the pineapple? The fuck is wrong with you, Gallagher?”

[meowmeowmessi]

brainstorming possible reasons why messi keeps persisting with the atrocious uncut grass ass haircut (and beard); listing some below:

too autistic to say "no" to his terrorist barber

considers the haircut to be some sort of "lucky charm" since he won the world cup with it thus no longer plans to move on from it (dear god) (someone tell him he probably would've scored a double brace if he had a decent trim + shave)

secretly fears the onward march of time and is trying to cling on to the illusion of youth by sporting the kind of hairstyle a prepubescent boy would choose for himself (only to make himself look a billion years older in the process)

genuinely likes this trim (mental illness)

[viric-dreams]

30 & 31 for The Whole Gang?? 👀

30. Who do they most regret meeting?  

Oh boy. Ockham regrets particular circumstances for sure (see: the group of sailors that ambushed and impressed himherthem), but as for individuals... probably the Youthful Naturalist for roping himherthem into this extended scheme involving some of Ockham's all time least favourite activities (zailing, piracy, and drowning)

I'm giving this award to the Benthic professor that Roberts thought was inviting him back to his lab to negotiate a new Searing Enigma supply chain, but was actually trying to capture him so he and his colleagues could test out their new cure for Yearning and Burning. If and when he eventually remembers the encounter.

I don't think Nite has run into anyone he truly regrets meeting yet, but I am going to very tentatively hand this to Grace for inadvertently introducing incredible amounts of complications into his life via "hey aren't you that sequencer?"

Tamara doesn't strongly regret meeting anyone, but she highly regrets her brother ever meeting the Jewel-Turbaned Youth. He ruined both of their lives.

The Rubbery Barber Surgeon regrets meeting and cutting the hair of a particular pilgrim from the Tomb Colonies, because she went back to the Tomb Colonies and told all of her buddies who still have hair about him, and whilst he appreciates the extra business, he is so sick of cutting and styling tonsures. It's been a straight month of this. The monks just keep coming. Please make them stop.

31. Who are they the most glad to have met? 

Going with the Bewildering Procession of Companions, Lovers, Suitors, and Paramours for this one. Ockham doesn't have an incredibly strong relationship to any one of them, nor any sort of constant reliance on them, but they're a source of consistency and stability in a place that is anything but.

The Commodore gave Roberts' life a purpose and without him Roberts wouldn't be anywhere near the man he is today. This might not be a good thing for anyone who isn't Roberts or the Commodore.

Nite is grateful for some of the revolutionaries who stuck up for him and with whom he formed bonds in those early days, particularly Myfanwy, who helped him solve one of the major mysteries about his apparent early life.

At the moment, Tamara's most glad to have met Ockham. At least there's someone else in this strange place who is equally out of place and unimpressed with the city. It's just a shame that heshethey's utterly mirror-mad.

The Tentacular Surgeoness, of course! 💖💖💖