#get a half hour lunch still
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As soon as I find another more suitable job, it's over for my current one
#hate the new change in management#really just one specific one#the other guy is ok#the first guy has my position come in at 8 now#and our day still ends at 5#so it's a 9 hour shift#get a half hour lunch still#and i have an hiur drive to and from work#i wake up at 6 am to get ready for work#and let's say it takes about an hour to really relax after i get home#that's 13 hours of my days dedicated mentally and physically to this job where i clean bathrooms and pick up trash#so i only get like. 3 hours of freetime before i have to go to bed (at 10. because i have to wake up at 6)#and I'm so tired of it#this is also partially the hurricanes fault because i had to move further away from both my jobs#the second job is done after today though so that'll free me up for job hunting
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i think my friends flaked on me
#we were going to go out for lunch together#but it’s been half and hour and they’re still not here…#i texted them and no answer#chat did i get too excited knowing this was probable#jex spam
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taking an extra half an amfexa before I leave work bc [redacted] (popular artist) is playing my city tn and I'll need it to cope with how awful the traffics gonna be when I'm on the bus 💀
#thinking of that post abt the customwr who tried to pay for smth with a piece of paper that said $40 voucher on it#and the guys coworkers being like how are u so calm? and the op is like i went to the break room and took an extra adderall#NOT TO MENTION PPL ACTUALLT GOING TO THE CONCERT ON MY BUS.....theyre gonna be soooo annoying 😭😭😭😭#but i wont care ill be listening to the katamari damacy ost and reading dorohedoro v10 peace and love on planet earth#i hope i get a seat at least#ALSO NINTENDO DIRECT WHEN I GET HOOOOME YAYY#.diaries#its fine cuz i didnt take a dose at lunch since i wasn't crashing anyway.. its only rly hitting me now#i didnt have anything to do at work this afternoon so didnt need to be able to focus.. someone from qc was using equipment i needed to#so i had to move it to another day. was nice tho i gave a coworker some of my leftover brownies n we took an extra half hour break >:)#and then went and complained abt [artist] to another coworker bc hes not a fan either LOL#very productive day 😇#im gonna need the focus to be able to call my mum tonight tho.. amfexa save me save me amfexa#and im gonna go to bed even earlier. i somehow got 7.5 hours last night which is a rarity for me but still felt knackered when i got up#maybe like 9:30 tn and hopefully it wont take longer than an hour for me to fall asleep and i can aim for 8hrs🤞
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Oh my poor little feet they hurt so much from standing all day I forgot how much I hate working retail and how much standing for a whole shift completely wrecks me orz
#bean babbles#I’m ln my lunch rn though so slay!#though I still have like two and a half hours before I get to go home#which is not slay
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the best thing about teaching toddlers is that the kids take a two hour nap in the middle of the day right after lunch and i get to spend most of that time doing nothing on my phone <3
#i spent part of it on my lunch hour today bc they went down while i was gone#and then i didnt have to do lunch time cleanup either#i just came back from my lunch hour a few minutes ago and they're literally going to be alseep for another hour and a half or two hours#and i just get sit sit here :)#usually there's some kinds of tasks to do during naptime but not today for me#but even when there's tasks its still basically an hour extra break after that#which is needed when working with kids tbh#anyway#i love getting paid to sit on the floor in the dark and scroll on my phone lol#so glad im done being horribly ill#if only this job paid better it would be the perfect job tbh#def going to start my own home daycare someday#its tiring but basically my job is to be fun and silly and make sure the kids are safe lol#also change diapers and wipe their noses all day long but its not that bad except for getting sick#i do change diapers when they start waking up from nap so i dont get the whole two hours off but still#its a very nice extra break
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Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 10: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression
(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)
Yesterday's poll decided that The Adventurer should join the travelers on the larger river boat for a short lunch ...
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"Before he even fully musters the courage to shout a 'hello', the large group on the boat initiates contact first, gleefully waving at him, whooping and shouting as they near his tiny raft in the water. Apparently, some of them were betting over whether they'd actually find any other travelers out on the river today.. He fumbles over his words a bit, as always, but somehow manages to successfully get himself invited onto their boat for a quick lunch..
After safely securing his raft to the side of the boat with some spare rope, he climbs aboard, stumbling into the excitement of some sort of celebration. A few of them explain that they're traveling for 'kahesallei', an old elven holiday recently re-popularized in some of the larger cities nearby. Whatever it's true meaning and origins used to be, the current significance (at least to those within the city walls) seems to just be mindless feasting, drinking, and gaudy decor. Most of the traveling group are strangers to each other, only brought together by catching a ride on the same tour/party boat, but the mood is light, quite friendly between them, and perhaps a bit drunk.
While the boat itself is relatively plain wood, it's been strewn with gold and orange banners, flags, shimmery tassels, beads, and bushels of dark green ivy braided with fresh herbs and wildflowers. There are flat round tables of food and drink, plenty of cushions to lounge on, and one random guy perched precariously on the edge railing of the boat, gently strumming a lute for background music..
The elderly ship captain hobbles over to The Adventurer, sternly explaining that, no matter what the 'silly' passengers say, he's only allowed to stay for an hour because he didn't pay for a boat ride ticket, and thus really shouldn't even be allowed on board. By the time The Adventurer has mentally processed this information, the captain has already returned to his little steering room, slamming the door shut with a displeased grunt.. It probably wouldn't be a good idea to confront him or question the rules...... But! Hey, at least he has one hour at the party.. How should he spend his time? "
~
Additional Information
the adventurer's current main goal: follow his map to reach the abandoned castle ruins and see the rare animal specialist about the mysterious egg he has
#paventure posting#polls#poll#choose your own adventure#LATE AGAIn I know.. I'm still in my weird unproductive spell. literally I've had the same 5 to do list items on my list#for 2 weeks now. I can't even do five simple things in 2 weeks lol. I did start some new supplements and change my diet since#my doctors are still trying to sort out what health issues are going on or etc. so maybe it's something with that#like accidentally on the new diet I'm not getting enough calories or not getting enough of some vitamin or something so it's made me oddly#brain foggy and just really tired and unable to focus well for the past few weeks or something..? ANYWYA. not really sure what#it is specifically but my functioning in terms of actually focusing on and completing tasks has been a lot worse . thus#chronically behind on things. which I am always chronically behind on things in some sense since I always have like 7000 projects#I'm working on at the same exact time and etc. lol. but like.. even more chronically behind than usual .. ToT#ANYWAY.. I'm suprised that the 'try to get a ride on the boat' option didn't get that many votes actually lol#Like.. treveling down a river in a tiny handmade raft is probably.. not extremely safe or efficient lol#But at least he gets to have lunch there. Just the hour that he's on the boat doing whatever will get him a lot further because the boat#is moving faster than his raft would be. It should still get him out of the river and back on track sooner. Because he still has a long way#to go to get to the abandoned castle. I know it's been a lot of days since I'm not keeping up well with actually doing these#daily or every other day - but technically in the story it's only been a little over a day since he left the Inn#The first day he just walked. the second day he saw there was a barrier in his path. then spent half the day building a boat. and now he'e#*he's where he is now. The trip is roughly 4 days and he's like.. a little over halfway through his second. Not counting any detours or#distractions he might run into. But at least at this pace he should be off the river before it starts to get dark#Thate the main thing. you want to get a good rest on solid ground. ideally. So long as nothing strange happens on the boat#but yeah! day 10.. of little elf man adventure... ALSO he is like early 20s I imagine. so he can drink hbhjbjh#I know the 'very quick simple ms paint style' is kind of chibi-ish so it makes people look young but he's not a boy#don't worry. I didnt want it to seem weird like some 10 year old kid walking into a party of drunk 30 year olds#like a toddler hanging out in a night club or whatever. It's safe and okay for him to be there. just for the record. lol#I mean maybe not SAFE safe. it's still a boat of like.. rowdy party goers who could easily fall over the edge into the water or whatever bu#but like.. safe in the sense that he's not a 6 year old being offered vodka by strangers at a party. etc.#despite his goofy nervous demeanor and chronic baby face syndrome he is indeed an actual adult somehow ghbj
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#I’m so happy gang I feel like I’m finally progressing vocally after my big scare last semester and it’s so good#I’m finally not stressed every hour of the day waiting for my voice to give out again and I feel like I’m on track in terms of memorizatiob#I finally have time to make a healthy dinner and lunch every day I’m finally getting enough sleep and I have time to do stuff outside schoo#also!! Faculty keep complimenting me and I know that it’s a low bar but still :))) I’ve put so much work into this role#and I was so excited/ scared to have a lead role because I have all the space to show people what I can actually do#and I half expected to fall totally flat or to have it like my first opera where I was too stressed to do it well or enjoy it#but I’m actually GOOD at this!! I have something I’m GOOD at!! And I get to do it!!#also I know the operas for next year finally yippee I won’t have another big role probably (tragic) but at least I can start preparing#and also I finally have some vague direction for my senior recital yippee so now I can focus on crafting a storyline w the rep#ALSO!!! Im probably gonna do study abroad!! And I feel good about my stage management stuff!!#go d I’m just so happy it feels like things are finally going well 😭😭😭 I’ve been throwing myself at this school for 3 years#and I’m finally getting something out of it hhh#portal of rambling
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I GOT MY MEDS YAYYY YIPPEE
#txt#gekkering#i got them yesterday but today i actually got to take them#bro i dony know how i lived like thet for so long#and im sure like 'withdrawls' make it worse but like i go to class and then i sleep for half an hour maybe an hour during my lunch break#and then after class i go to the student lounge and sleep for 2 more hours#and then i get home snd im still so exhausted. like its not normallllll#oh well i have them now
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oh my god am i so fucking tired
#work ended two hours ago but still just so so tired#to be fair it was my first shift back in two weeks after that GODFORSAKEN cold#tales from diana#i was very anxious to do this last night. i had a hard time falling asleep#didnt get as much sleep as i wanted but i still did sleep#i had a half-day kindergarten job originally but when i got there they switched me to full day fifth grade#and it sure was a full day of fifth grade#theyre doing this thing right now in the fifth grade where they switch classes and go to the different teachers#to prepare for middle school. i get it i get it it's a good system#but i did have to teach a one-hour writing class three times to like sixty kids in total#it's a lot. AND i had to do a lunch duty god forbid#tomorrow im subbing full-day for a different kindergarten teacher and since im goin there i doubt theyll send me anywhere else#unless i guess someone else abruptly calls out sick but like. uhhh i just wanna do this k class ive been w them like 4 times this month#theyre easy i know these kids they dont scare me#and in early childhood ed theres always like at least a para or two#in the older grades im lucky if theres one para but today there were none#all day. goooood im tired
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everyone in my household owes my friends and my ex girlfriend so fucking much.
#red rambles#'when i yelled at you over the spices earlier i actually meant thanks for making lunch' 'alright well im glad you got there eventually' 'yo#have a very abrasive manner of speaking' thank you! i am restraining myself from calling you a fucking asshole to your face. Thank me for#my fucking patience.#yeah man i spent an hour cooking for you and when you got off work you immediately lit into me for doing it wrong and then spent like a ful#fifteen minutes yelling at me over the counters being dirty (which YOU dirtied. for the record) because i had the audacity#to ask that next time i not have to hurt myself trying to get spices out of the disaster you yourself made of the spice rack#by moving ONE THING.#and then you want to wait until the next time i resurface from avoiding the sound of YOUR tv that you play super loud to remind me that#you're an ungrateful pos who doesn't give half a fuck how much work anyone else does for you?#thank me for not screaming in your face.#like it's insult on top of injury at this point. I don't give a shit. You don't have to fucking thank me i do not care. Don't fucking get#MAD AT ME for doing what YOU ASKED. DUMB ASSHOLE.#it's okay i have a handle on my fucking temper. but THEN. don't get on my case for being a little bit less gracious than i could've been#'you know you catch more flies with honey than vinegar' yes well i would like to shoo the flies out of my FUCKING HOME. have you considered#that.#oh well. i'll be out of this fucking place in like a month.#if you told me when i was 15 that i'd be begging for school to start again just so i could get out of the house i'd have asked you why we#hadn't just walked in front of a moving car yet. sometimes i still wonder.#pdl
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i had a very embarrassing meltdown earlier today while cleaning the house but then i went out alone to buy groceries and it was really cold and windy and i hadn’t taken a jacket so going through the motions of buying stuff calmed me down and then i got home and helped my cousin make lunch and then i portioned out the meat for the meals of the week to store in the freezer which settled me even more. i’m fine now other than feeling a little sad i guess
#x#im gonna eat now bc i have to go to work in a couple hours 👍#random aside but i feel like i’m going crazy over the amount of chicken portions i managed to get#i bought two whole kg and i was like oh surely this will be enough for like. the week. and then when i went to portion it i only got enough#for 3 meals????#and i was like surely not… maybe the pieces i chose to consider a ‘single serving’ we’re kinda big but idk that still feels like too little#😭😭😭😭 like for reference we make lunch/dinner for 5 people in the house… you’re telling me 2kg worth of chicken lasts 5 people barely half a#week… 🥲 i gotta be doing the maths wrong here somewhere#to be fair there’s usually leftovers but also those Usually get used up anyways bc we pack those leftovers for my mum and my dads lunches#the next day#idk. i was just very confused lol
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If the next 10 or so days go okay I'm gonna be so fucking high on the 20th. Not in a substance sense but in a "has two jobs now and just got the first paycheck for it" sense
#myposts#personal log#tbf I'm actually making less at the new job and i even gave up a couple shifts at the old job for it#but the consistency will justify it i think#to be able to expect 3+ shifts a week of REASONABLE hours... EVERY WEEK?#and in only sacrificing $1/hr and paid half hour lunch?#i'll fucking take it#i dont love sacrificing paid lunch but ive done it before. just means when im on break i feel good about telling calls to get fucked#AND!!! there are TWO close restaurants. and im only a few minutes drive from home. i'll make it work ❤️#i remember the month i worked at mcd#i was making quite a bit less and my hours kept getting cut and i STILL brought home decent checks
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it is sooooo crazy how my manager has wanted me to do everything else the past few weeks leading up to [redacted work event] but now that we're getting like. dangerously close to it happening, they're starting to freak out bc barely any of the prep is done.
like. oh? the prep? the things ive been wanting to start working on, but have been unable to, due to a myriad of less important + less time sensitive tasks that you were prioritizing for some reason? it's not done? woah
#ntm like five other things that are gonna take me an average of 3.5 hours to complete that are supposed to be done this week#and i think i can work a max of 19 more hours this week bc we arent even approved for OT#AND i can only work two more days this week bc of other scheduled things#so today i worked like. just short of 11 hours i think? + only took half of my lunch#and ive had like. very little help#its not worth explaining if im not actually going into details but it's just very frustrating bc i am trying and i have been trying#but im not going to kill myself to get this shit done /especially/ bc it could've been so easily avoided if they were better at planning#sorry im not done yet#it just gets me bc ive been in this position for a couple of months and ive literally wanted to do some of this since i got the position#but i literally have not had the time to bc there's always things that either they or their manager think are more important#and now it's crunch time and they suddenly care about it#but. there are still regular tasks that have to be completed. that they will also chastise me for not completing.#even though ive barely had any help. and probably will continue to not have much help.#😜 anyway i have one more text to send and then i dont have to care about any of this for another 36 hours#also sorry for starting another post with it is sooooo crazy. but like. it is truly sooooo crazy.
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I feel so guilty for immersing myself in calming things NDOEPWMSSM
#dora daily#ughhh I barely ate a thing today#my half eaten breakfast and my uneaten lunch#I just don’t know anymore#this exam season is so tame compared to how I usually am because I just completely wore myself thing#thin*#but it’s still so horrible I can’t sleep at all I just sleep five hours or maybe four idk and I keep waking up in the middle of the night#AAAAH#and I don’t eat and I literally look like a corpse#my mum says I look like a corpse a lot but I don’t think so but now even I think so#my room is usually dark so I look fine but when I open the lights i get jump scared#I’m in a horrifying state LOL
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they should make a work that doesnt leave me hungry exhausted + with a pending migraine :(
#i get so hungry by like half 10 in the morning but i have to wait until half 12 or later to eat....#and then im hungry again around 4pm.. my lunch break is only half an hour i physically cant eat more food than i already do in that time#i need to start taking snack breaks#at least when i start meds one of the main side effects is appetite suppression so maybe thatll cancel out lmaooo#im gonna have to start beefing up my breakfasts so i can make sure im still eating enough.. i rly dont wanna lose any weight#theyre putting me on concerta to start with btw 🫡 i probably wont get it until next weekend tho#maaan. i hope i sleep better tonight im so tired#.diaries
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#tag talk#my tendency to go from 0 to 100 really does stab me in the back sometimes#I straight up scheduled two lunch dates tomorrow without realizing that Tuesday is the same day as Tuesday#one is morning lunch and the other is afternoon lunch so it's totally chill and okay but like. whoops#understimulated or overstimulated. you can never be just whelmed.#anyway. making friends is cool and after chewing through like fifty people on this social app I finally found someone cool#also I can put in so much work on dating apps but my first good friends keep on being coworkers.#that's highkey one of the reasons I wanted to get a job sooner rather than later. automatic social interaction#growing up is just the journey of me realizing that being anxious and paranoid isn't the same as being introverted.#cause damn. I need so much people interaction. I love cashiering because I talk to so many people every day#and then I get home and still send paragraphs to like five close friends and then still hunt for people online#hmmm. I wonder if it's also partly that talking to people is not the same as talking With people.#I can send a huge paragraph to someone but it's only interaction if they respond.#being needy drives people away. which in turn creates more need. driving people away even harder#idk. I'm so tired of having so many friends I never talk to. we both agree we're friends but they're always so busy#I'm always willing to sacrifice to spend time with the people I love but it feels like others don't feel the same#“we should hang out. we haven't talked in forever. we should watch a movie together” MATE I AM FREE AND AVAILABLE#like. don't tell me we should hang out if you're not going to hold up your end of making it happen. “sorry I'm busy” well be less busy#I get it's not always an option to just be less busy. but you can't find half an hour to just walk the city park together?#idk. people make claims of intent and never follow up with action. and I get it. I have wildly high social need apparently#and I try to keep on top of it. I try and restrain myself because otherwise I'm exhausting to be around; further driving people away#but I hate being a nuclear core that I constantly have to dump coolant over. my heart locked in a concrete bunker#wait. I'm gonna draw that shit
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