#genuinely. i just like writing darker stuff or whatever

[scamera-writes]

Eating Your Love

Contains heavier topics (content warnings in the tags)

I’ve never loved something with half my heart I only love fully, whole-heartedly if you will

I love like jumping off a cliff and not knowing if there is water below. I love like a gun with two barrels and one bullet and laying it in your hands with my eyes closed. I love like sipping at poisoned wine and knowing you have the antidote under your tongue. I love like a knife to my sternum and trusting you to wrap your hands around it.

I will stare into your irises and give you my heart Still warm with love and blood The shades of red mix on our palms And I will leave fingerprints on your cheek

A gift of my undying willingness and trust A sign of my hopefulness and passion A desperate ask for you to place your heart in my hands A wish for a returning love to cradle to my face

We can place them on the table And sit and eat together Sipping at glasses of blood While our hearts pump in synchrony Staining the porcelain red

Your teeth will chip the chalice And I cut my tongue in your mouth. Your lips will spill smoke And I will let my lungs fill with gray ash.

I will leave my chest seeping with blood A gaping hole to my missing organ Sticky and raw flesh, red in my love for you Torn bones cutting your fingers when you touch me

So that when you drop my hand and my heart I can place it back in my rib cage Stitch the wound closed with kisses And wait for another to pour my love out onto

-Eating Your Love (By me)

[azurlily]

Guess whose not dead?!

(This is an actual post with a character, just scroll down to the pink bow if you don't want to read this.)

I was in and out of the hospital for a long time. I'm sorry I haven't been writing, but I'm doing so much better. I've closed requests so I can catch up on the ones I currently need to do.

I also wanted to mention some of the newer works(that AREN'T being requested) that I plan to make will probably be either smut or darker stuff. It's a way for me to cope and I enjoy writing altogether.

Yandere!CEO x Fem!Reader

Morena(yan!ceo) x fem!reader

Synopsis: You're a young woman working in the tech industry, you know people(mostly men) don't take you seriously. Due to the constant stress of needing to be better (just to be considered good) you are constantly anxious and jittery, you've also developed a depressive mindset and you consistently struggle with taking your medication.

You just got a new job by a large, female owned, tech company! You thought you'd feel better and you wouldn't have to deal with a toxic environment. You were dead wrong; your boss is a bitch and expects constant perfection and no less. You were just barely able to make it under her radar, until she starts going through files- and you find yourself in her office with a deal you just aren't allowed to refuse.

Not like you can refuse a demon after all?

TW: Non-consensual kissing and physical touch, somewhat mentions future kidnapping.

The reader is kissed(while under a spell that takes away will-power from their body) and is forced to sign a contract against their wishes.

You stand quietly, with your hands in front of you- clasped together so tightly you'd think you were about to get in your knees and pray. But no, instead you were ready to beg to not be fired.

That's what this was right? You were getting fired and your horrible, asshole, bitch-faced boss wanted to say it to your face. You could cry, you almost did on the way here.

Yet as much as you wish you weren't in this situation, as much as you wish you could repent for whatever you did; you genuinely have no idea why you've been called here. You've never gotten a write up, all your reports are clean and bug free, and you work well with seemingly everyone.

You stand face forward, staring at the woman who decides wether you get to eat for the next month. The same woman who while you hate her, you can't -no you won't- deny her beauty. You-

"Hello?! Do you hear me or are you too busy pissing yourself to pay attention?"

You look down, wondering if you genuinely did pee yourself, only to see dry pants and floor. You look back up at her and she gives you the look of someone who both wants to laugh and yell(not in the good way).

You wondered if there was something who had tried to sue her for how rude she was. I'm sure there could be some sort of case, as long as there was proof. Hell, even witnesses would do.

"Sorry, ma'am. What exactly is it you called me for? Has my team done something wrong, did we miss some meeting, or did-"

She stands up, slamming her hand on the desk so loudly it echoes. You nearly jump out of your skin- was she going to hit you?!

"Be quiet. I can't handle you prattling on like a cow. I'm not firing you, nor am I firing anyone on your team. In fact, it's quite the opposite. Oh and please- call me Miss Morena. Thank you."

Oh she is definitely a condescending bitch.

You thought for a moment, 'quite the opposite'. So you aren't getting fired, hell you may be getting a raise! Maybe Morena wasn't so bad of a boss. Maybe she just likes hard workers.

"Thank you, ma- Miss Morena. If I may ask: does this mean I'm getting a promotion?"

Morena smiles, not the smile you give someone when they're right about something. The smile you give when you're a fox, and you've just cornered the bunny you've been trying to catch.

"Yes, a promotion of sorts. I actually have a contract for you, but I can give you the gist and read the rest to you later."

Morena pulls an inch thick stack of papers from the desk. She sets them aside with a pen and slowly steps out from the desk. Morena signals you to come closer, but you only take a few steps forward. You could practically feel how badly this situation was going to go.

As Morena got closer, you began to feel more compelled to make eye contact with her. Like someone was whispering into the back of you mind, telling you to look up. To look into the beautiful blue eyes that Miss Morena holds. To never look away; keep your eyes on hers.

Don't look away from me. I always get what I want and that isn't changing anytime soon, little rabbit.

"Well I've been looking over employee information and I noticed you moved from very, very many jobs before you got to this one. Never staying in one place. I never really liked people like that, and from what I've seen, people like that have done the same with my company. Now I hope -very strong word here- that someone with skills like yours wouldn't do something to this company. I hope that you'd stay, willingly of course. You would stay willingly, right?"

Of course you would, you never had any interest in leaving. You planned to stay past the one year mark, past the time where everyone would get raises in order to ensure you were getting a that this place was a good opportunity. You loved it here, you loved you teammates, your boss, you loved the office building itself.

"Of course I'm staying, Miss Morena. I would never leave."

The words coming out of your mouth felt robotic, they felt like you were lying to yourself and others. Like you were in your body, but you weren't the one speaking.

"Good girl, now go over to my desk and sign you name on all of those papers. Don't read them, you don't need to. You can put all your trust in me."

You did exactly as you were told, you signed every paper with you signature. You didn't even think, your body was moving like second nature. You had this warm feeling in your gut, this safe and controlled feeling. You like feeling like this- don't you?

You hear some shuffling behind you and yet you can't turn around to see what's going on. You only hear a voice.

"You know while your under I guess I can explain. You can't really yell at me or try to run away, so I can speak my peace. You're going to be the newest human I suck the life out of! But hey, for the next few months you'll get to live lavishly and without fear of anything. Other than me of course!"

Your brain registered what she was saying, but you couldn't respond. What were you doing to do? What could you do?

"Come here bunny."

You turn around and walk straight into Morena's arms. She gently grabs your face, you just noticed three of her fingers on her left hand have been filed down. Meanwhile the nails on her right hand, as well as her pinky and thumb on her left, are long and colorful.

Morena pulls you closer to her, her lips ghosting over your mouth. You feel her press her lips to yours and you get an overwhelming feeling of disgust wash over you. You feel nothing but utterly dirty as she kisses you, you feel like someone's just stabbed you and is trying to clean the wound to make themselves feel better about the act.

Your eyes are wide open the entire time, so you watch Morena go from kissing you deeply to pulling back in what looks to be shock. Her pupils dilate slowly, her eyes relaxing and you see nothing but black take over.

"Oh...oh you're much too sweet to kill."

Morena gently moves you head to the side pressing her tounge against your neck. You feel her shiver and watch as she pulls back with a dark smile on her face.

"I take back what I said about you enjoying these next couple of months. . . You'll get to enjoy such pleasures for the rest of your life. With me."

You let your body process her words this time, you don't know how to react. Instead you feel your eyes wet themselves, your expression hadn't even changed. And yet, you were crying. Morena notices almost immediately and you watch her face distort itself into a disdainful look of annoyance, until it twists into one of sadistic pity.

"Oh, shh, bunny. Hush now, stop those tears. I'll take the spell down once were home, in my home you wont be able to run away. So you can have a tantrum all you want there. I know you don't like me right now, you maybe even hate me, but give it some time. You'll realise you need someone, and I'm the best you'll be getting for the rest of your pathetic human life."

Everything goes black after that.

[starless-nightz]

I love your stuff girl and I’ve been on a sbg obsession again and I’m wondering if you could write an Ashlyn with an s/o who dyes their hair differently often (def not self projecting) either way I’ll be back to annoy you with other stuff love your stuff <3

Ashlyn with her S/O who dyes their hair often

note -> I'm glad you like my stuff!

warnings -> none.

content includes -> fluff, she loves your hair, helps you color it.

Every time you come around with a different shade, Ashlyn catches herself staring a little longer than she means to. She's interested in your choice of color and what that might mean, but she'd never ask outright—she'd much rather hear you ramble about it on your own time.

She'll offer to help dye your hair, even if she's not particularly good at it on the first tries, she'll take it seriously and try. You might end up with a few colorful streaks where they shouldn't be, but she'd laugh it off sheepishly and apologize. Plus, it's a good excuse for her to spend more time with you.

Ashlyn gets used to spotting you in a crowd by your hair, whether it's neon pink, rich navy blue, or even more subdued like pastl lavender. It is almost a game when a glimpse of whatever the new color happens to be makes her smile—just a little, because she knows it is you.

She's sentimentally in love with your hair dye choices. Every time you change it to some other color, Ashlyn likes to imagine that it is a mirror of how you feel or what you have gone through. And although it was just because that colour looked awesome, she finds herself wanting to remember every shade, like tiny chapters in your story together.

Ashlyn loves seeing you in bright colors. It contrastingly makes her darker, more reserved style pop, and she loves how you bring a little vibrancy with you wherever you go. Even on days when things feel tight or bleak, just the sight of your brightly dyed hair can make her feel like there's some semblance of hope.

She will take some of the extra hair dye bottles after you're done with them and store them in her room, like little mementos. She would never admit it, but she likes those little reminders of time that you have spent together, even if it's just a discarded bottle of pink dye.

When you try on bold colors, Ashlyn is your greatest admirer. She wouldn't show excitement, but she would give you a very genuine compliment that means so much if coming from her.

She likes running her fingers through your hair when it's freshly dyed. It has become one of those unconscious habits when the two of you are alone that her hand will find its way into your hair and softly twirl a lock around her finger. She likes it soft from a fresh dye, even when she acts as if it doesn't matter.

She is tactful in not making jokes about the color of your hair dye if you're sensitive about it. Even when you are all put together with your style, Ashlyn can find her way to be considerate of what is important to you. She respects that this is a form of expression for you, and she would never do anything on purpose to hurt your feelings with a comment like that.

Anytime you're talking about changing your hair again, she'll tell you colors that she thinks would look good on you, although she'd never come straight out and say it.

Ashlyn has been keeping pictures of all your hair colors. She keeps it to herself, but every picture holds a moment unique-your smile right after dyeing it electric blue, how the sunset hit it when you used that fire red, or going with a darker tone looking like you had stepped directly out of a dream.

[rogue-durin-16]

LUCKY LUZ

Request: omg you are my favourite writer, and I read your bob stuff weekly again and again ! If you feel like it, I was thinking prompt 7? With George Luz ? I’m a sucker for angst so like anything angsty with my boo George Luz.

Summary: Bastogne took a serious toll on Easy Company. At the loss of so many friends, George Luz started to tamper with his luck a bit too much for a certain medic's liking.

Prompt/s:

"We have a problem." "No— you have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps getting in trouble."

Pairing: George Luz x medic!Reader

Genre: angst

Tags:

Band Of Brothers: @fernando-jpg @chubbypotatoepie @tvserie-s-world @clumsy-wonderland @lordndsaviorwinters

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @comfort-reads

Warnings: mentions of death, survivor's guilt, self-destructive behavior, depressed George Luz (YES THIS IS A WARNING I'M GENUINELY SORRY)

A/N: you asked for angst? I'll give you angst. Also, it's been SOOO long idek if I'm gonna write the BoB boys right/as I used to, so bear with me while I try to get the hang of this again. Enjoy this request and remember they're open so feel free to send ideas <3.

Band of Brothers masterlist

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

In war, much like in any aspect of life, there would always be recklessness.

Little did it matter whether it was on the XO's, the Privates' or the civilians'. There would always be recklessness causing avoc amongst the carefully detailed strategies. It wasn't an excuse for whatever the outcome was, but it was expected and one could somewhat prepare to counteract it— to balance it out.

George Luz's behavior during our last days in the Bois Jaques was not recklessness.

No, it wasn't something as simple, so easily justified by inexperience, pride or short-temper. It was darker, more complicated, and way much worrying than recklessness.

'you think he's tryna kill himself?'

Spina's question, the one he had whispered to me in our foxhole a few nights prior, echoed in the back of my mind every day since then.

'Don't say that.' I had responded at the time.

Now George Luz laid before me, unconscious, with bandages under his winter uniform and I asked myself the same damn question.

Twenty Hours Earlier

"INCOMING!"

Lip's shouts were barely audible, muffled under the thunderous shelling of our position.

We had just managed to advance further into the Bois Jaques and towards the town of Foy, which seemed more and more unreachable each passing day, when that dreadful whistling hovered over us.

Foxholes barely dug and low morale after the loses we had endured the past couple of days, made it harder than usual to react on time.

Thankfully, German artillery hadn't zeroed us yet, so most of us managed to take cover.

If most of us managed, why was George still standing out in the open?

"LUZ! GET DOWN!" Someone yelled, but it didn't reach him.

"GEORGE!! DOWN!!" Lipton's throat sounded sore, but it did the trick and soon the Technician was crouching, yards away from me, helmet secured with one hand and his rifle up on the other.

Lucky Luz, an ominous, abrupt silence followed his delayed reaction as the shelling seemed to come to a halt.

"Woah," as if everything was fine, he snapped back into his carefree demeanor with a breathy laugh. "That was a close one, huh, Y/n?"

My immediate, impulse-driven reaction was to yell at him, although not even I could hear it.

Another deafening whistle.

Another explosion.

Maybe Luz was lucky himself, or maybe, just maybe, he was lucky we were willing to risk our lives for him.

Maybe he was just lucky I jumped out of my foxhole to pull him into it.

Maybe he was just lucky I wrapped him in a tight embrace to shield him from possible shrapnel the best I could.

Maybe, just maybe, he was lucky enough for me to feel his yelp despite not hearing him due to the explosions— lucky enough to have been dragged on his back instead of his tummy.

Lucky enough to be in a medic's foxhole.

The shelling stopped, this time for good. I halfheartedly let go of Luz, my gloves now crimson-stained.

My heart skipped a beat.

" 'M hit—"

"Christ— I got it." My covered palms instinctively found the left side of his ribcage, but failed to reach his wounded upper thigh.

"—fuck-" he hissed, jolting his head up in pain and consequently bumping it on my shoulder.

"LIP!" Before I could yell anything else, our Sergeant slid into the foxhole.

"WE NEED A JEEP OVER HERE! PERCONTE!" He shouted, pulling George towards him so I could move aside and properly fix him up. "It's alright, George, you're okay— right Y/n?"

Luz was not okay. We knew it.

But I couldn't exactly say that, specially just after he had been hit.

"Right, Y/n?" Lipton insisted intently, holding George in place while I ripped his jacket to have an easier access to the main wound. "Y/n?"

"Yeah- yeah, right." I mumbled, dusting the sulfa powder where he had been hit. "Sarge, I need that jeep."

Lipton sighed and looked over his shoulder. "Perco?!"

"They're comin', Lip!"

George was awfully quiet as he tried not to recoil due to the pressure put over his open wounds.

"It's alright." Lipton repeated, more to himself than to Luz.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

GEORGE'S P. O. V.

"You're awake." She stated even before I could open my eyelids to see her standing by me, arms crossed and a frown on her face.

"How'd you know?" I question, squinting and blinking a few times before propping myself up in the poor excuse of a bed in which I had been laid to recover.

" 'Cause I know you."

"Where are we?"

"You got hit."

"I know."

"Then why on earth did you ask—"

"Dunno, I was hoping we'd be in heaven." I winked at her before completing my sentence. "Since you're my own personal angel."

Silence.

"You think it's funny?" I opened my mouth in agape, not knowing which was the right answer to that —because there was always a right answer with her— but I had no time to choose. "You think it's funny that I had to put myself in harm's way to drag your ass to safety?"

I furrowed my brows with a puzzled half smile and a sort of anger I couldn't describe brewing inside me. "You're kiddin' right?" A single breathy laugh escaped my throat. "C'mon Y/n/n, I thought you knew what you were signing up for when you volunteered to be a medic."

"Excuse me?"

"I mean if you don't know you have to 'put yourself in harm's way'," I mimicked her voice, which left her stunned. "Then, we have a problem."

"No. You have a problem." oh, she was mad. "I have an idiot who keeps getting in trouble." The medic was quite obviously trying not to yell at me.

"Okay, if you say so." I shrugged, trying not to let the turmoil of emotions the conversation was triggering inside me show through my careless facade.

"What are you trying to do here, George?"

"Nothin'?"

"Why are you trying to get under my skin?"

"It's just what I do best, sweetheart."

And it was true. For two years, I had been an awfully insufferable piece of shit.

How could I not? When that was the only way to get her attention back in Toccoa; the only way to stand up in the eyes of the prettiest woman I had ever seen amongst an entire Battalion of men.

Not that it took me anywhere per se, but at least we had forged a friendship based on sweet bickering, muffled laughs and knowing glances.

She used to laugh all the time.

Maybe I was no longer funny. Had I lost the one thing I was useful for?

Or maybe she was tired of me.

She did seem tired then, staring at me with a saddened, wornout visage.

"You're not okay." She nearly whispered. "I'm done letting you pretend you are."

"I'm not pretending—"

"You think I don't know what means being medic?" Her tone told me I had crossed the line. "You think I don't know I gotta get out there if someone cries for help, no matter how scared am I or how slim my chances of survival are?" Y/n tried to stay gentle, but she had had enough, which somehow scared me. "But no one screamed 'medic', George. You weren't down. But I still got out there to get you. It was not my job, do you understand?"

Shut up shut up shut up.

"Well if you're gonna complain this much then you should've left me there—"

"To die?"

Despite the crazing chaos that surrounded our little corner in the aid station, I somehow heard nothing but a deafening silence and the pounding of my heart.

"Do you wanna die, George?" I went livid, trying to look for a reply that wouldn't make me crack. "Is that what you're trying to do? Kill yourself?"

"Are you nuts?"

"Answer my question."

"I-" Scoff. "what d'you even—"

"Luz."

"I'm tired! I'm just tired and didn't react on time, okay? Is that what you wanna hear?"

"What I wanna hear is a good reason not to get you pulled off the line!" She shouted, stomping on the cold ground beneath us.

Oh, now people were staring.

She used to become so self-conscious about that; people giving her looks for raising her tone.

As she stood straight by my side, towering over my bed, there was not a single ounce of self-consciousness in her frame.

She was mad. Mad and hurt.

Hurt because I wasn't being honest with her. Hurt because she had been sticking up for me for an entire week because I just wasn't there; because I was, like she had just said, I was an idiot getting in trouble.

"So? Go on, then." The medic spurred me, gradually lowering her voice again. "Give me a good reason."

"You can't get the XO'S to pull me off the line, Y/n." I chose to respond, almost daring the girl.

She was holding back. I didn't quite know from what exactly but I knew she was holding back, and a part of me wanted Y/n to lash out.

I'm sure a part of her wanted, too.

Tension could be cut with a knife, and deep down I wanted to give her an answer but the truth was I couldn't find it, and if I was damn good at something, it was dodging the bullet.

"Listen if you don't have anythin' else to say," I shrugged with my brows raised. "Guess it's better for you to head out."

"Y'know what? I still have something to say." She spat through gritted teeth, yanking a stool that stood alone by a blooded stretcher. With a deep breath, she sat down beside me, which was the last thing I expected her to do. "You're a fuckin' moron. You've always been. But you've never been an asshole." She spoke intently, trying to get her point across despite me not being in the best place to listen. "You're not an asshole, George."

No matter how angry or frustrated she was, there was always an inherent sweetness in her tone whenever she talked to me, one that shook me to the core because how could someone be so lovely in such horrific setting? How could she be so lovely to me?

"And you're not gonna convince me otherwise." She firmly stated, staring straight into my soul to make herself clear.

'I see through your bullshit'.

"So quit it."

She remained expectant, waiting for me to say something —anything.

I couldn't.

She knew it.

With a defeated sigh, she reached out for my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before getting up and out of the tent. It was her way to apologize because she had to leave. I knew that gesture too well.

Aldbourne, Early September

Laughter and soft music kept the good spirits high inside the crowded pub in Aldbourne; our small safe haven. The only place where I had seen Y/n loosen up completely.

She lit up the place, dancing with Penkala, telling stories with Guarnere, cracking jokes with Martin —her dry humor matched his perfectly.

It was, I think, while she held onto my arm, throwing her head back in a fit of laughter due to something Babe had said, that I knew I loved her.

Even with her head on my shoulder and my arm lazily wrapped around her waist, she remembered to check her watch. Ever the dutiful one.

"Jesus! Would you look at that?" She pulled away from me, her fingers gently clasping my forearm before giving me an apologetic smile. "Gotta head out already, boys."

"Oh, c'mon Y/n" Buck complained, but she repeated the gesture with him and he knew no amount of convincing would get her to stay.

"But we're just getting started!" Babe complained.

"Sorry, Heffron. I really gotta head out." She squeezed his bicep briefly when she walked past him. "You better not be late, Compton!" She yelled as a form of goodbye before waving at the boys filling the English bar, now a bit less merry. At least for me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

READER'S P. O. V.

"M'kay what else do we need?" I asked Gene, my trusted pencil in hand to write down the supplies needed on the back of a photograph.

"What d'you have so far?"

"Uhm... Morphine," I listed, raising a finger. "bandages, three pairs of scissors,"

"Sulfa powder." He added, going through the boxes we had left.

"Sulfa... powder..." I muttered with knitted eyebrows while I noted the words. "Anything else?"

"Let me check—" The medic stood up in his foxhole, his attention caught on a particular voice coming from our left. "Ain't that—"

"Yes it is. Fuck." I handed Eugene the photograph and climbed out the dug out patch on the frozen ground. A part of us expected to be wrong, but of course not. What had initially been tentative steps turned into fast stalking. "Are you kidding me?"

George's laugh died down and a wave of 'shit's came out of the group of veterans surrounding him, who quickly spread out.

"Missed me much?" The attempted playfulness was charged with masked fear. He let out a yelp when I grasped his forearm and dragged him away from curious ears. "What's that for?"

"Don't you dare act stupid." I hissed with a menacing index finger up at his face.

"Okay, Y/n, listen—"

"You went AWOL in this state. I'm not listening to any bullshit."

"Oh, c'mon" the dismissive eye roll only made me fume even more. "We've all done that."

"It's not the same."

"How."

"You're. Not. Okay. George."

"Oh and you are?!" I sushed him when he inevitably rose his tone at me, clearly forgetting we didn't know exactly how close we were to the Germans. "Breaking news, Y/n/n!" The belligerent tone in which my nickname had come out sounded so unnatural. "no one's okay!"

"Winters is expecting my final advice."

"On what?"

"On whether to pull you back or not." His mouth opened in agape, betrayal reflected all over him. "I wasn't bluffing when I said I'd get you out." There was a finality in my words, one that neither of us liked.

Since the current situation seemed to be leading to the one which had place in the aid station a couple of days prior, I turned heel and attempted to leave.

"Y/n wait—" George's digits yanked back the sleeve of my coat. "I don't want out!" His throat suffered from the rasping.

"Then why does it look like you do?"

I should have stopped pushing.

"YOU DIDN'T SEE IT!" He exchanged the whisper-shouts for a loud cry filled with anger and frustration and something that made his chocolate brown irises water.

"SHHHH!"

"DON'T SHUSH ME!" He was losing it. It wasn't the yelling that gave it away, but the push on my shoulder.

I shouldn't have, but I myself didn't have much patience left in me. Against better judgement, My gloves found the lapels of his coat and shoved him back against a nearby tree. "I don't wanna get shot, George, so tone it down." The softness in my pitch came out as a hard contrast to my actions.

It did the trick, though. After a gulp and a deep breath, George's tone lowered. "You didn't see it? Okay? No one saw— I- They- " My hands abandoned him in order to offer some space, hoping that would help him articulate his thoughts better. "There was noth- nothing left!"

"What's-" I tilted my head to the side, trying to make sense out of the unfinished sentences. "What d'you mean w—"

"And I was right there!" He pushed himself off the tree, an index pointing at his chest violently. "I had to see it! Right in front of me!"

"George, you need to slow down-" my palms raised in surrender, ready to grab the technician if necessary.

The tension he was building up made both of our hearts pound faster each passing second for more than one reason.

"First Toye and... And then that happened and I-I had to dig out the fuckin'- the goddamn cross! I was- There were... Parts of 'em—"

Oh.

"It was... I was looking for it all over and... it was all mushy and I don't know if it was... Dirt or... Jesus..." The man took a step back, consciously or not and his legs seemed to falter ever so slightly.

"Okay, I got you." clasping his forearms with all my might, I helped him hold himself upright, not without some staggering. "I need you to breathe, okay?" My eyes searched for his, unwilling to meet mines. So that was what had been happening.

"I don't want out." He stated with a shake of his head, making a single strand of hair wobble over his forehead. "I don't get to leave."

Sigh.

"Muck and Penkala," he flinched at the mention of their names. "They'd want you to leave."

"You don't know that." It was a murmur, much less intended to be said out loud than the question that followed it. "Do you want me to leave?"

No.

"I just don't want you dead."

"That wasn't the question."

I don't want you to leave me here. Alone.

"For god's sake George—"

"Why do you want me away so badly?" There was a sort of plea in the question, one that was breaking my heart. "Did you get tired of me?"

I love you.

"That's not—"

"If you're done with my bullshit I can just ask to switch platoons."

I love you.

"George I'm telling you—" I groaned, letting go of him. "it's not about that."

"Well whatever it is, I can just switch to second,"

"George."

I love you.

"they're short on people anyway."

I love you.

"I don't need you to switch platoons."

"Then what the hell do you need?"

I love you.

"I need you to be careful!" Now it was me who needed to be sushed. "You're gonna get yourself killed. And you're gonna get me killed!"

That hit a nerve.

With regained strength, George shortened the distance I had just put between us in order to try and breathe, a task that seemed to become more difficult each passing second.

"Then stop sticking out for me!"

I love you.

"It's not that simple!"

"Why not?"

"I love you! You idiot." Lucky me, Luz was way too perplexed to tease me about the red tinge bringing life to my cheeks. "I can't just... look away if you're doing something stupid."

Maybe I would have preferred the teasing over his unresponsive behavior. Yeah, I would have rather had a cheeky grin lighting up his face, instead of the lividness washing him out.

"I don't need you moved to another platoon," I attempted to redirect the conversation to a less pathetic outcome, and George didn't seem to oppose. "I just need you to be careful and take care of yourself." Still no response; my heart sunk deeper if that was even possible. "I've lost too many friends already. Can't lose another one."

"How long?"

"What'd you mean?"

"How long have you known?"

"I don't know." I folded my arms and recoiled from the man in front of me, actively avoiding to meet his gaze. "I think... Maybe Normandy. When we regrouped."

Normandy, D-Day plus 3

"Look who decided to show up, Floyd!" Luz and Liebgott went straight to the Sergeant walking a few steps ahead of me and Shifty, ready to compare their trophies and souvenirs.

It wasn't until Talbert folded his newly acquired poncho that the boys became aware of us.

"Well, would you look at that." Lieb smacked George's shoulder with the back of his hand before nodding in my direction.

"Sorry fellas," Floyd feigned an apology. "But I figured I just couldn't show up without our medic. Right, Luz?"

If there was a situation in which George would not match the banter thrown at him, that was the one. Instead, he stood still with widened eyes.

"What? Cat's got your tongue?" I questioned, approaching the group with the sniper trailing after me.

"Oh, she bites now." Lieb snickered. "That's fun."

Still no response from Luz, apart from the shocked expression. I was about to taunt him again when he shoved Tab aside and engulfed me in a hug, one that took me a hot second to reciprocate.

"Where the hell have you been?" He limited himself to ask, breath fanning on the crook of my neck.

"Missed the DZ by four miles." My explanation sounded restrained due to the tight embrace. "Took a while to walk 'em."

"Thought you didn't make it." He murmured, this time only for me to hear. "If you scare me like that again I'll kill ya."

Peeking over his shoulder, I caught the knowing eyes of our comrades. Either Luz was unaware or didn't care enough. I myself had other things to focus on, such as the butterflies in my tummy or the scary feeling swelling up my heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why didn't you tell me?" His question hid something I couldn't quite decipher, although the gleam in his eyes could be worked out as a clue.

I shrugged, trying to play off the conversation I had been avoiding for months due to fear. "Why would I?"

He shrugged too, and, after opening his mouth a couple of times without getting a word out, I assume he was at a loss for words.

"I feel like we went off the topic here." I stated, once more trying to redirect the conversation, and once more failing to do so.

"Did you mean it?"

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I inhaled deeply. George Luz really had a gift for driving me mad. "Can we move on from that? 'Cause at this point we're dragging the conversation and I'm-"

"You should've told me earlier."

I finally met his eyes with an exasperated look.

"Would that change anything?"

"I could've done something about it."

"Like what?"

He hesitated for a moment, darting a quick glance at my lips I nearly didn't catch before closing the space between us, his hands cupping my cheeks with a featherlight touch.

Just like in Normandy, it took me a moment to react; only that this time I wasn't fast enough and George slipped away from my grasp and took a step back.

"Where d'you think you're going?" I snapped, once again clutching his coat, this time for a very different purpose than minutes ago.

As my mouth found his again, deepening the kiss with my fingers entangled in his unusually long locks and the sides of my coat bunched up in his fists, I wondered if I had really found out I loved him in Normandy.

All from sudden, the feeling that I had known it from the very first corny pick-up line he had thrown at me back in Toccoa washed over me.

Either by the long awaited kiss or by the overwhelming emotions, it was my turn to pull away in order to catch my breath.

"Could've saved me a lot of teasing, y'know?" He mumbled, letting his forehead rest on mine for an instant. "Having everyone and their mother poking fun at me was pretty embarrassing."

"You really are an idiot."

That tore a quiet laugh out of him. A genuine one. It seemed to be so long since that had happened.

"I love you too, by the way."

"Oh, I think I got the memo."

Another laugh. His stupid grin. His cheeky demeanor. All of it made him lit up a little bit. My thumb caressed his face, and it occurred to me that maybe what George Luz really needed was to feel loved.

Lucky him, I wouldn't be going anywhere any time soon.

[olderthannetfic]

I find it really sad when proshippers partake in "cringe culture" so to speak. you can't build your platform on anti-harassment and then make fun of people for being into something you deem stupid/trash/etc.

Like, I know in my mind that proshipping is more about anti-censorship and being pro "darker" stuff so to speak, and that it's not REALLY built on "we shouldn't make fun of people for reading/watching Stupid Stuff" but shouldn't the two be connected? I'd honestly argue that the latter argument is a stepping stool to the former?

Because how can you reblog "all ships are good ships" "ship and let ship" and then make fun of someone for being for an adult who still ships Steven Universe characters? How can you post "RPF is fine" but then make fun of that person on stan twitter who's a bit too into kpop rpf?

just makes me sad. The people who have made fun of me for the most for my MCU hyperfixation are my fellow proshippers. I've unfollowed people for posting book-tok screenshots that are clearly just mocking the OP for the fact that they read Colleen Hoover or whatever.

And I'm not talking about privately shittalking something, or just hating something in general; I'm not not even really talking about laughing at the *media/media creator itself* and criticizing it. I mean, I myself still laugh at the "read another book" Harry Potter meme (which, if i really need to add a disclaimer, i am DEFINITELY not talking about people who think it's weird and fucked up af that some people still like JKR as a person because. . .how can you at this point?). Moreso I mean people who claim to be SOOOO anti harassment and SOOOO pro-all-forms-of-art-even-'bad'-art (whether the art be bad in a moral way or in a creative way, whatever "art" "bad" "moral" and "creative" even MEAN because it changes with everyone.)

Obviously no one is going to like every single piece of art ever, and it's, imho, really human to be a "hater" to some degree! I just have a problem when someone genuinely makes fun of the FANS of something or thinks that someone is less intellectual just because the someone in general likes Disney/Twilight/Taylor Swift/Hamilton/whatever. No one gives af if you think a certain writing or acting style is cringe, but if you think the fans are cringe, that says more about you than it does about the fandom.

(also as a send off -- all the 'yous' i said here were general, def not directed at anyone on this blog. I'm just venting and this seems like the best place to do so where people will agree with my words.)

--

[rist-ix]

This might be weird but bare with me: i saw some fanart of valtor and his mamma bears (I'm sorry), he was freshly made and a child still for some reason (idk if it's canon at this point that he was made in adult form or not buuuut) and so it's shown how they don't like him but at the next panel he wants their makeup so tharma and lysliss give him a makeover and at the end belladonna says i think we'll find a use for that pretty face. What i started thinking was if it's possible they used him as a pr0stitute at some point besides all the torture they put him through. My brain today is fixated on how much trauma or ptsd he could possibly have. Now that i write it i sense how weird this is but what do you think?

My friend my dude my brother in fandom, I am but a humble bacteria and u have given me the juiciest slimiest tastiest agar plate imaginable. Let’s get INTO THIS!

(For the record, this is purely fanon. I think I’ve alluded to this headcanon of mine in fics but I am well aware that I have little to no evidence from canon for these assumptions.)

ABSOLUTELY I think that Valtor was used for getting into royal's beds. Though I do think it would have been more complicated than simply “his moms are whoring him out cause they hate him and they want stuff from people” — and I think there are some FASCINATING implications that has for both Valtor's personality as a whole, and his relationship to sexuality and his own body.

First of all, the reason why I think you are correct is simple: he seems to be universally regarded as attractive in-universe, to the point of having even the Trix fawning over him, and he is consistently seen using charm and flattery to get others to do what he wants. If you wanted to expand on this in a darker and more mature setting, the logical conclusion would be that he'd use his body the same way. And I do think he would do that entirely of his own will by the way, no coercion necessary! Though there most certainly was coercion.

That ties a little bit into my view on the Ancient Coven's relationship to each other in general. While we do see Valtor and the Ancestresses at odds with each other in the finale (culminating in the Witches ‘disinheriting’ him and reverting him to his monster form), the fact that they seem to have worked successfully together for AT LEAST a good few decades implies they could be cordial when necessary. Plus, Valtor somewhat wistfully recalls working under them with Griffin, smirking and content in the flashback, makes me personally believe they were genuinely GOOD at cooperating too, instead of the Witches relying solely on tyranny. Don’t get me wrong: there is no way they were a happy family. I'm thinking more along the lines of them playacting as a very harmonious coven, doting creators and loyal creation, like a game that every one of them is in on — a performance, just for funsies, and because none of them want the outside world to see them as anything but perfectly aligned and ruthlessly efficient. All that while also having a sort of spiteful, vengeful arms race going on internally, with Valtor not-so-secretly trying to find ways to overthrow them, and them waiting for him to lean out of cover too far so they can gleefully, brutally remind him who's in charge.

There's a deep, deep, deeply rooted resentment Valtor seems to have for them, but they are also objectively the same: They both want power, they both want to control the Dimension, they both would do anything to accomplish that goal. So if there was a situation in which having someone charming on the inside would help them, I think both Valtor and the Witches would come to the conclusion that Valtor could do whatever necessary to accomplish that. Be it charm someone, poison someone, or sleep with someone in the hopes they might spill some secrets. I consider all four of them to be pretty pragmatic, I don’t think there would be any conflict or hesitation here — not at first.

Because while Valtor would certainly agree that that’s the best approach, and probably be more than willing to get out of their sight for a while and live it up in some palace or another, I do think it would chafe at him eventually. Whether he's using his body to fight people or seduce them is not all that different, both happens at their behest. He's always painfully aware that he is their tool — but I imagine it does get more pronounced with the latter. Especially over time. Your taste in people or attraction does not matter in combat, but certainly plays a role in sex. While Valtor certainly seems to enjoy putting on a show in combat, that is a power play, whereas having to play a long con, with himself so heavily involved no less, can start to feel humiliating, tiring, more like a loss of agency than a game of wits. I don’t think it’s the seduction itself that would bother him, but the clear knowledge that he's just following his creator's plans here, puppeteered even in this aspect of his life.

The result of that in the present day of the s3 era wouldn’t be sexual trauma per se, I would headcanon. Not in the ptsd sense at least. (Though I bet a good fic could convince me otherwise :D) I remain a firm believer that his trauma is purely about his lack of control over his physical form, and a revulsion towards his original body that borders on dysphoria. The sexual aspect of his utility to them would ADD to that, don’t get me wrong, but it wouldn’t be the main source.

It DOES influence him though.

I'm thinking mainly about Valtor's interactions with the Trix here. On multiple occasions he secretly witnesses how they argue or straight up brawl over who gets to have him. None of them even thinks about who he might have shown the most interest in, they treat this solely as a contest of strength, winner takes all. (I don’t think that’s them being rapey btw just to be clear. I see it speaks more to them being juvenile and deeply unserious about romantic relationships, like dogs chasing cars. They don’t care enough about people beyond the three of them to have any actual experience with romance: Darcy's fling with Riven was discarded INSTANTLY once the three had something better to entertain them — like world domination. If one of them had “won” only to get ignored or rejected, the other two would have laughed her out of the room and then they would have done it all over again the next day.) im getting distracted. What I meant to get to is that Valtor sees them acting like he's a prize to be won… and he does not react at all. The first time he finds it mildly entertaining, the next few times the bit seems to get old for him already. That’s it. He encourages their possessiveness of course! He clearly enjoys being feared, admired, or simply the center of attention, but being treated without regard for his own desires doesn’t really register as an insult to him. AND he's shown to be pretty unperturbed with Darcy getting into his space, and flirting rather aggressively with him.

And while that may seem anticlimactic after all that, I find that FASCINATING. (Not just because Winx Club consistently writes men — powerful men! — the way female characters would be treated in another show. An essay of its own!) A non-reaction is still a reaction, and Valtor's lack of irritation says a lot in my opinion. I think he has little to no real boundaries, at least outside of combat or with people that are allies/useful to him. By that I don’t mean he would reject someone's advances if he didn’t welcome them, but that he wouldn’t really remember that this is a point where people usually DECIDE whether they welcome the advances or not, u know what I mean? I think his entire sense of self is pretty nebulous to himself, and that his own body seems to him more like a commodity than, well, him. Which makes sense, doesn’t it? He is created as one thing, for one purpose, and then given another body, for another purpose. He prefers to be human, reviles the monstrous form, but has no control over which one he is at any given moment — the people who do could change their minds on a whim. It would make sense for him to feel somewhat alienated from his physical form, and therefore have little care for what happens to it. It would take him far longer to know his own reactions, and to realize whether he enjoys something or not.

I feel like I’ve only managed to put like, half of what's in my head into words here. The dysphoria thing alone feels like something that should be dissected on its own, but I’m dead tired and this post is already pretty long. I will say that I’m not 100% consistent in this headcanon, and depending on the fic I use some of this and some of that, but I do think it’s one of my most favorite reads on Valtor as a character. Thank you so much for this ask!!! I hope the answer is close to what you hoped for lol

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

...Can you tell I really like Invader Zim and Hollow Knight?

Anyways uh- REFERENCES FOR ALL OF MY Z-O-M-B-I-E-S MONSTER HEADCANNONS WOOOOOOO FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!! These are all rlly self indulgent tbh, especially all the alien headcannons, but in mY DEFENSE! I can do whatever the fuck I want lmfao. Which means pointless patches of darker skin in very specific places on the zombies, references to raccoon Wyatt and alien lore that you have to do olympic level mental gymnastics to fit into the plot of the movies WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

The ref sheet for the Armistian's true form is kinda old(and I've actually posted it on here before lmao), but I haven't actually changed anything about their designs besides like, a couple minor alterations to the colors, and I genuinely think the art holds up to my current standards, so I decided to just reuse those refs instead of redrawing them entirely. Also for the record I have a LOT more headcannons about the aliens, the werewolves and some rewrites to zombie lore to make zombieism more akin to a chronic illness then a race thing, I just don't feel like putting them in these ref sheets. Because that would take a lot more effort then I am willing to put in rn. Feel free to send me asks abt them tho!!! I love infodumping abt my Z-O-M-B-I-E-S headcannons and rewrites :D

My least favorite parts of drawing refs and stuff are one; I have to draw the characters in their underwear half the time so I fully understand where different markings and shit are supposed to go, which makes me feel weeeeird, and two; I never have the energy to give the characters unique poses and shit cuz I have to draw and write so much shit that they all end up just fuckin. Staring blankly at the camera. It makes me uncomfyyyyyy-

Also the "very strong bones" bit on Addison & Bucky's refs is a TFB reference. Because I am insane.

Ignore the fact that I'm literally posting this in the middle of the night I had a really hard time finishing Bucky's ref okay-

@imjustavenuxwithaboomerang

[mantequillamcwhoremick]

Is there a both option? I mean the question is how far would Cartman go and risk alienating Kenny and I think the answer is quite a lot and the track record really shows that he can get away with basically anything and not get disavowed from the friend group 🤔 so there isn’t really a disincentive to not try to break them up, especially if he thinks they will eventually get over it and return to status quo.

Though on the other hand I do think it could go the route where depending on what lengths he goes to…while it might not permanently sour any relationship Cartman has with the two boy separately, but I couldn’t say the same with complete confidence for the Kenny and Butters connection. I think if any dysfunction starts interfering with Cartman’s schemes, he might get fed up and try to fix it somewhat 🤔 Although somewhat as a side note though he already spews vitriolic hate speech and slurs, I would have a hard time believing he wouldn’t find some way to take advantage of the Bunny relationship and be more embolden to start saying even darker more heinous stuff because he believes he would receive less push back as *insert sound bite “How can I be homophobic my b*tch is gay🎶” *

(In reference to this poll)

True, Cartman would definitely take advantage of his friends being in a gay relationship to get out of any accusations of homophobia just to spew even more homophobic crap, but while Kenny is arguably closest to him out of the main 4, I kinda feel like he doesn't need KENNY to be the friend he takes advantage of bc of this. He would just as much say this about Stan and Kyle (even if they aren't even together lmao) and he is pretty much canonically 1000% on board with THEM being in a gay relationship (see "Cupid Me" and "Guitar Queero").

Some people reblogged the poll with some interesting takes, and I gotta say what convinced me the most is the fact that Cartman just kinda has it out for Butters at all times lmao. I'm convinced he would think that Kenny can do better, and especially if Kenny started calling Cartman out on how he treats Butters, he'd think Butters is "corrupting" Kenny and trying to ruin his and Kenny's BFF-ship.

The way he reacted in concern about Kenny's girlfriend being a slut who would just "throw his heart in his face" in the episode "The Ring" has me convinced, that Cartman somewhat weirdly cares about Kenny's relationships, and not just in a self-serving way. This isn't in an attempt to alienate Kenny, but rather alienate the potential partner, and we've seen a LOT of instances in which Cartman does not have any qualms about painting Butters as the bad guy and/or someone to be made fun of.

As much as I'd love to advocate for some kind of compassion Cartman could express for Butters, their friendship is just not built on that. Butters and Cartman get along well enough, but only as long as Butters goes along with everything Cartman says. Once he goes against it, Cartman either goes LIVID or completely dismisses/invalidates his concerns. Some good episode where you can conclude this, are "Let Them Eat Goo", "The Death of Eric Cartman", "DikinBaus Hotdogs", "Poor and Stupid", "The Magic Bush", "Tegridy Farms", "Super Fun Time" and about a hundred more, but when I think of Butters & Cartman's friendship these are the ones that first come to mind.

The only instances where he kind of seems to care about Butters' distress in small ways are in "The Magic Bush" and briefly in "Super Fun Time", but it's not significant enough to qualify for the genuine respect I see him show Kenny (or even Stan). I can write a whole essay about the nuance of Cartman and Butters' friendship, but that's for some other time. In short: Cartman really likes having Butters do whatever he says, and Butters doesn't even need to do anything particularly defiant for Cartman to start putting him down (ex. the ending of the "The Death of Eric Cartman" episode.) If Kenny, who is Cartman's weird soft spot, started going against Cartman in favor of Butters, whose established dynamic with Cartman completely benefits him, I can imagine that this would rub Cartman the wrong way.

I could be convinced though, that once Cartman realizes how sad it made Kenny, if (thanks to one of Cartman's schemes) his and Butters' relationship were to not work out, Cartman would begrudgingly take some kind of pity on Kenny (and maybe even Butters) and recognize that being together is what makes them both happy. He then would do another scheme that gets them back together, and "Smug Alert"-esque not want them to know that it's thanks to him hahahh

So yeah, it could be kind of "both", but, in my humble opinion, only AFTER Cartman damages their relationship almost beyond repair in an attempt to keep them apart. Which is why I, personally, would still go for the "manipulative-anti-matchmaker" option. But I purposely didn't add a "both" option bc most people would go for that without thinking it over too much lmao

Thank you so much for the ask anon, sorry for taking so long to respond but you truly made me think about this a lot ahaha this kinda turned into an analysis of the trio more than an answer to your ask, I hope you don't mind. You made my braincells fire off

[teardrop-scales]

Matchup for @babulejka

I match you with...

Macaque!

I think you two would be a genuinely healthy and good couple.

Macaque could definitely use someone like you. Your kindness, cheerfulness and politeness as well your energy and optimistic outlook would contrast well with his more quiet, snarky, sassy and brooding nature. You two give me a "miss sunshine and mr grumpypants" kinda vibe, and that's good honestly! It's one of my favorite ship dynamics XD

You said you have an elegant and lady-like kinda vibe as well, and these vibes also seem like something Macaque would be into for some reason.

Considering both your styles and your looks compared with Macaque's style, I think you two would be an aesthetically pleasing to look at couple. I can't really put into words why, but I think your clothing styles would fit Macaque's general vibe.

Macaque is very attentive and observant, so he'd give you some rings, earrings or brooches that he thinks you would like, or just ones that reminded him of you. You wouldn't even have to say at any point to him that you like that kind of stuff, he would notice on his own because he actually pays a lot of attention to you.

Generally I feel like Macaque is the type of person who quietly notices and notes down in his mind what kind of things you like, so he knows what kind of gifts would make you the happiest.

Macaque admires you for having so many interesting hobbies and passions.

He is a theater kid for sure, with his love for dramaticness and shadow plays, and you have a few hobbies that kinda match that.

He is amazed when he learns that you do ballet. You better believe that he will be at your every show if you participate in that sort of thing, in exchange that you come to his shadow plays as well, of course.

I mean, you literally said you organize puppet theaters! And Macaque is into shadow plays, which is also a form of theatre! I'm sure that's only one of the many topics you could talk to each other and bond about. If that doesn't prove that you two would be perfect for each other, I don't know what will lol.

He'll try to get into some of your hobbies. They are so creative and interesting, like I said, Macaque admires that very much as a theatre kid himself.

I headcannon that Macaque, like you, can also play a few instruments and sing quite well. And considering his storytelling during that one shadow play episode, maybe he would be good at composing songs too and writing poems. So I can see the two of you having music sessions, just playing your instruments and singing together. Macaque would also definitely offer to help you in writing songs and such.

Macaque is a demon and a celestial monkey; he's pretty strong and has a good stamina, so he'd gladly try to get into your hobbies such as fencing or archery and practice with you.

But he wouldn't try horse riding. Just... No.

Like you, Macaque also wouldn't probably limit to just one or two love languages and instead would try to show his love in different ways. Although he may be a little shy and distrustful of physical contact especially when you're the one initiating it, since how much trauma this guy has and what he's been through... So you'd have to be a little gentle and patient with that, but he'll come around and understand that you won't hurt him after some time.

Your love for nature and fascination with the world around you was probably one of the many things that made Macaque fall in love with you. He would gladly take you for walks around Flower Fruit Mountain and introduce you to the little monkeys.

And he has his shadow portals! Which means, he can take you all around the world basically. Wherever you want to go, whatever you want to see or experience, just say the word. Your wish is his command.

If you start talking to him about space or oceans or just any topic that you're interested in, he'll listen to you while staring at you with a soft smile.

Surprisingly or not, I think he would like your darker sense of humour. I feel like it could match his snarkiness and his brooding nature.

He knows you're stubborn, but he wouldn't let you overwork yourself. He has a silver tongue when he wants to, so he definitely would try to coax you into taking a break, and preferably spending some free time with him. If that doesn't work, well... He's much stronger than you, so he'd probably just take you into his arms forcefully and drag you away from your work lmao.

Oh, and he'd definitely eat anything you bake or cook. If you bake cookies or something similar he'd probably try to steal some before they're even ready, just to mess with you. He'd use his shadow portals and do it when you're not looking. We all know he's pretty sneaky.

A.N: I know I haven't mentioned all your info and your hobbies, sorry for that, but girl, you have SO MANY of those, if I mentioned every thing this would be too long I think XD. Hope you're satisfied.

[writermask-0807-backupblog]

A/N: for @nunezs-stuff who requested this! I sincerely hope that I’ve done your request justice, and apologies for the delay. There might a few mistakes since this is my first time writing yandere. And I also sort of may not have met your OC’s personality quirks, but hey, I tried. Hope you enjoy! 

Warnings: probs super Cringe cus it’s my first writing yandere, definitely ooc Genya (ngl he sounds like Bakugou 😭), possessiveness, kidnapping, yandere behavior, different forms manipulation, mentions of being locked inside a house, chained, etc etc, you know the gist. 

When he first meets you at the selection exams, Genya finds you insignificant, another hopeful face in a sea of others- an obstacle in his path. 

Then that indifference to your existence turns into annoyance because you’re like a mosquito he can’t crush, constantly on his heels and by his side, chattering on and on about one whimsical thing or the other, and although he’s made it sure that you know he “doesn’t want your stupid friendship goddamnit!” you just smile gently in response, undeterred by his anger. 

Still, for some reason, you stick by his side through thick and thin despite his insults and his unwarranted anger and his rough edges, and slowly, the annoyance turns into expectation.

As slow as it is, Genya begins to expect your constant  presence by his side, he begins to expect the shape of your mouth curving into a smile just for him, and he, begrudgingly, begins to accept it. 

Then the acceptance begins to swell into something more, something like attachment and something else he can’t yet discern. 

You begin to make him feel… different.

You with that soft voice and meek eyes, you with that gentle touch and saccharine sweet smile that makes his heart wrench for someone reason, and the first thing Genya wonders is, is he sick? 

The answer is yes, yes he is. Lovesick for you, that is. 

Genya doesn’t accept it, at first, doesn’t want to ruin what he already has with you, but he knows that these feelings won’t go away either. 

So he shows his love for you in subtle ways. 

Whenever Genya sees something you’d deem cute, you’d find it by your bedside table by the next morning, and you know it’s him, judging by the furious red dusting his cheeks and ears when you next see him, and you wisely decide not to poke him about it, so instead you just grin, brighter than before. 

He’ll share his food with you if he knows you skipped a meal, and whenever you’re feeling down, he’ll try his best to cheer you up, so “quit sulkin` around!” 

And although he looks disinterested to any outsiders, Genya makes sure to hang onto your every word as you talk, even though it’s probably about cute, pink things you like or some other airy topic he probably won’t understand much. 

And then the lovesickness bleeds into something unhealthily darker. 

Genya genuinely believes you’re not something he deserves, but he’s selfish, and he wants to keep you for himself, because he knows good things in his life are fickle, and never last long. 

So when he sees you chatting with Tanjiro, with that same soft, tender smile that’s meant only for him, Genya decides that while he’s not worthy of you, nobody really is. 

Nobody but him are allowed to see you. To touch you. Nobody but him are allowed to see the way you smile, or hear the sound of your laughter. 

You are his, and his alone, so he wards off anyone else who wants to talk you, all bared teeth and jagged scars and growling voice. 

See, since it’s not an if when you’ll get into fights about his possessiveness, and rather a when, he’ll weasel his way out of it by manipulating you in whatever way he can. 

He will lie, guilt-trip, gaslight you and victimize himself, and since Genya is quite insecure- in himself, in your relationship, half of it is not even a lie. 

He’ll also probably use his guilt about the whole Sanemi incident to convince you be with him. 

And that’s not even the worst of it. 

Since you’re both demon slayers, and your soft-spoken demeanor makes him think you’re a little bit weaker than the average slayer, he’ll try to get you to quit. 

And when that doesn’t work, and you get injured in a mission, Genya takes it upon himself to, in his mind, protect you. 

(He knows you won’t willingly quit the corps so he’ll knock you out if he has to, and keeps you in a house he’s made his own, just for this reason only.)

You’re granted the freedom to do whatever you want to  inside the house. 

Since he doesn’t have any estates like the Hashiras, he will take you outside with him by his side so you won’t be able to escape, his hand resting on your lower back or on your arm, a reminder that you’ll never be able to escape, not with him around. 

And, well, if he finds anyone else trying to help you escape…

He’ll make sure they’re not around to help you out a second time. 

Overall, you have no chance to escape, because he’s barred the windows, made sure to lock all the doors in locks strong and heavy enough for you to not be able to break. 

Hell, he’s even chained you inside your room, just for an extra measure. 

This is all to ensure that, you’ll be by Genya’s side forever. 

“I love you, I love you, I love you, goddamnit! Why can’t you understand that?! This is all for you. This is all for you, so why are you looking at me like that?!” 

FIN-

[twistedastrology]

Outer Planets & Affliction: What destroys a man.

----------------------------------------------------------

gonna talk abt a much darker topic today bc i feel like it and it's absolutely fascinating to me from a very morbid perspective (which happens a lot 4 me)

im gonna start this off by saying this is mostly focusing on extreme cases/what Could happen due to outer planet affliction, none of this is definite if u have afflicted outer planets bc it depends on the severity of their affliction and how many good counter aspects u have to them that help u heal!! :)

to start, the outer planets to me are Saturn to Pluto, so let me give u a quick rundown of what I think these planets are responsible for when they're heavily afflicted:

Saturn - Destruction of the will, the snuffing of one's inner, driving fire.

Uranus - Destruction of the mind, losing your cognitive function, going insane.

Neptune - Destruction of the spirit, loss or lack of intuition, feeling lost within your own life.

Pluto - Destruction of the body, the vessel decays and lacks the strength to repair itself.

i wanna say as well that all of this essentially came to me in a vision from god, i genuinely had no basis in my head initially, i was just rambling to myself in my head and all of this clicked and then it genuinely made sense and i even had evidence to back it up, so i wanted to post abt it because i love dark stuff like this (my blog name isn't twisted astrology for no reason- i mean like the reason was bc it was a play on twist and twisted transistor by korn But yknow it gains reasons as i go on-)

let's go over why each planet destroys what they do:

Saturn destroys the will because it rules over time and persistance- Capricorns are more often than not very driven people, Saturn grounds them and gives them the stability and willpower to see things through. A strong Saturn is often manifested as a very powerful driving force, as the planet often acts an incredibly crucial pillar, if not the foundation in a person's chart.

Uranus destroys the mind because it's the higher octave of Mercury. It rules over innovation and change, even higher thought. A strong Uranus is often an indicator of a genius in whatever area of life the planet is placed into. Thus, when afflicted, it completely shatters and even lacks this potential altogether.

Neptune destroys the spirit because it's known as the planet of spirituality. It's the planet of our higher self and our shadow self, it's our connection to the planes of existence beyond our own. A strong Neptune is often indicative of enhanced intuition, and can even mean the person has a heightened level of awareness of their place in the world and where they're meant to be in life. So naturally, an afflicted Neptune means a complete lack of perspective and the loss/lack of the ability to realize there is more than the self, making one feel lonely, inadequate, and lost.

Pluto destroys the body because it rules over death, transformation and rebirth. It even rules over destruction itself, and its connection to death gives it an inherent connection to the physical body as well. A strong Pluto can manifest as a strong will, but also as a higher pain tolerance because of that. Therefore when it's afflicted, the soul's vessel lacks the ability to transform and regenerate itself effectively, and ultimately will crumble to pieces throughout the course of life.

OK- lemme write normally now instead of all fancy n shit 😮‍💨 But what's my evidence to prove all this-

well someone i know has very heavily afflicted outer planets, mainly saturn, uranus and pluto, but neptune was kinda roped into the affliction as well- and all of this checks out.

saturn especially hits him hard, which also makes it all karmic so idk wtf bro did in a past life but it had to've been Bad bc he's got some SERIOUSLY afflicted outer planets like jesus fucking christ- and like i dont wanna talk too much shit on here but he's insufferable to say the least and, probably bc of the afflicted saturn, will not do the work to fix it.

would genuinely hate to be him on his death bed like 🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

ANYWAY-

like i said initially tho this does not mean if u have a kinda afflicted uranus, ur gonna go insane!!! no sir!!! it's just abt the extremes n stuff and what i have literally seen happen with my own eyes- i think most people have enough soft aspects to get them into the process of healing, maybe not even soft aspects maybe just solid placements- it's all subjective, rly-

but this is also a really good way to talk abt the Power that these planets have- they are NOT to be fucked with bc when afflicted, they can obliterate you and your entire life tbh- i dont think they Want to unless you somehow have beef with them but overall they are just incredibly powerful planets and i truly think when reading someone's astrology chart, you GOTTA look at the outer planets bc otherwise you're missing out on SOOOOO much crucial information.

i always say that i think outer planets, whether in transit or in a natal chart, have the absolute MOST impact on a person despite being so far away.

far away ≠ lack of impact.

i hope this was interesting to read or at least thought provoking bc i absolutely LOVE dark topics like these, probably my moon/neptune in my 8th house tbh- i mean im genuinely fucking petrified of tornadoes like lilapsophobia type shit but i still put that image here because i unfortunately think they are really fucking cool at the same time (ive had multiple nightmares where tornadoes have killed me. but like........ they're kinda cool......and i hate them........)

anyway!!!!! thank u for reading this far into my yapping session 🙏🙏

[blazehedgehog]

How DID FNAF get so popular in 2014? (God, that was 9 years ago.) Was it just a right place, right time thing?

A bit, yeah.

I think it's pretty clear from the popularity of Halloween that kids like to be scared (and to scare each other). There was a whole market that a lot of studios either forgot about or never tapped into.

Because, like, when you think about "horror for kids," you think about, like... Grabbed by the Ghoulies, or Luigi's Mansion, or even that one Haunted Mansion game Disney put out.

Games that are absolutely more silly than scary.

But we were in the era of the "creepypasta," which was undoubtedly dominated by kids between the ages of 13 and 18 writing about how their Sega Genesis was oozing blood or they had summoned Jeff the Killer by calling his number at 3am or whatever.

And this was after years of top Youtube Let's Players cutting their teeth on games like Amnesia and Cry of Fear. Kids were now intimately familiar with actual horror. They were hungry for sterner stuff than the typical idea of what kids could tolerate. Googly-eyed skeletons and technicolor sheet ghosts weren't cutting it anymore.

Five Nights at Freddy's was laser focused at this demographic: characters and a premise even adults find scary (uncanny animatronics turned killers) married with extremely simple gameplay that's all about building up to what is effectively somebody going "Boo!"

I currently live with my brother and his family, and he has twin sons. They're six years old. When it's time for bed, they give hugs to everyone. And when it comes time for my hug, every night for the last year, they try to sneak into my bedroom so they can jump out and shout "Boo!"

And when they do manage to surprise me (either because I play along or because they genuinely come in so quiet and secretly that I do not notice), it is one of the greatest things for them. They'll go bouncing out of my room and one will proclaim to the other "I GOT UNCLE RYAN!"

Even six year olds like the "Boo!" It's universal. The ultimate, most primal form of prank.

And despite trading in dark themes (dead children and a conspiracy to hide their deaths), there's no blood in FNAF. The violence is, at most, implied. And since the lore was deliberately obfuscated, its darker themes are gated by how deep you're willing to dive. Younger kids who might not be keen enough to figure out the easter eggs and hidden story elements are spared, whereas older kids can devour theory crafting videos until their eyes cross.

I don't necessarily think Scott Cawthon did everything deliberately. He's on the record saying FNAF was kind of a last ditch effort for him to be successful at game development, after all his other (Christian/Educational) projects were non-starters. I think certain parts of FNAF were probably more a happy accident. But he did land in the right place, at the right time, with the right game for what an audience of 13-18 year olds was most likely to connect with at the time.

And in the bigger picture, it was like the popularity of characters like The Crypt Keeper, Jason Vorhees and Freddy Kreuger finally came home to roost. Those were characters of the late 80's and early 90's that found surprising popularity with kids of the era. Growing up I was both amused and terrified of the myriad of Freddy Kreuger merchandise, and they straight up made a Tales from the Crypt saturday morning cartoon. From something that aired on HBO at 10pm and routinely had nudity and quite a bit of gore.

Even if their parents never liked it, kids have been getting scared by adult horror for decades.

Now, with FNAF, it was literally Good Christian Fun™ with enough of an edge to it that kids didn't feel like they were being talked down to.

[shaanks]

CHOOSING VIOLENCE uhhhhhhhhh there are so many I want to ask for you uhhhhhhhhh ALL OF THEM no uhhhhhh 13, 14, 19, 23

beloved I have been so miserable I am sorry this has taken so long, but here we go!!!

13. worst blorboficiation

okay so as always blanket statement this is just me talking, not yucking anyone's yum, but like. Vergo??? of all people??? is this hugely popular? no. but it's not uncommon, either, and I genuinely cannot get my head around that one. venn diagram of people who liked the blond marine who was mean to the little girl in fan letter is a perfect circle probably.

Also, and this is just a pet peeve bc he annoys me, but like. Bellamy lmfao. that dude JUST took the first step of not being the shittiest type of dude ever in Dressrosa, and we haven't seen him again since. It's not like big hunky tattooed dudes are thin on the ground in this universe, I simply don't see the appeal.

14. that one thing you see in fics all the time

oh oh easy, people who write Nami mean as fuck but like. Derogatory. In general people who write characters OOC and unlikable and shitty to "get them out of the way" of whatever the ship is they're writing. Like at that point why are you including them. This isn't specific to OP fandom this is just a widespread problem in communities that write fic for fandom.

tbc taking characters into uglier or darker characterizations than their canon counterparts isn't always bad, in fact it's frequently fun and really interesting, I'm specifically talking about shallow mischaracterization to get Pesky Wimmin away from m/m ships. A widespread epidemic which plagues us all.

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

nothing! i've spent a lot of time making active strides to not feel ashamed of things that bring me enjoyment, we're banishing catholic damage in this household lmfao.

that being said I have accidentally sort of backed myself into awareness of being into things that I wasn't previously AWARE I liked, and that has come with its little moments "oh no..." clarity.

but in terms of like tropes or types of fic or things of that nature I don't feel bad about any of it lmfao, abo, dc, kink stuff, slice of life, schmoopy romance (as all will have noticed by now lmfao), there's stuff I like in a lot of places.

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to

I don't really have anything that I initially hated that I like now, tbh, but I do have this like, waffley love-hate relationship with doflacroc lmfao.

I go back and forth between like. thinking it's hot, thinking its awful, thinking they're well matched, thinking I don't want that awful bird anywhere near Crocodile, thinking it's really funny, like.

They're like THE situationship to me as the purest definition of that word, like there's clearly a link there, but I have never settled on whether I genuinely like it or not lmfao.

Thank you again for waiting for this bby and for sending me questions, ily!!!

[finchinmoria]

So I got an idea for an Adar fic featuring an original male character that just would not let go, so I started writing it down. I’ve now outlined 11 chapters and have written a considerable bit of the first three chapters. I’ve only ever written fic for myself or shared it only with a few friends, but I think Adar has the power to take my AO3 posting virginity. At least, at this point, I’ve decided I really want to finish the fic and post it.

I’ve had tremendous health issues the past year that have interfered with my creative life, and I almost didn’t start writing this story down, but oh, am I glad I did. I have not experienced such joy creating in quite a long time, and it is such a salve to all the stressful things in my life right now.

I have to say though, in writing for Adar the most embarrassing thing to admit is that it’s a cozy romance. Extreme fluff. We’re talking like, a scene in a pumpkin patch level of fluff. Don’t get me wrong, I have been licking up every bit of Adar smut in the AO3 tags but it’s just not the story I want to write atm. Besides, fluff is kind of its own smut if you know what I mean. (Fluff girlies [gn] unite.)

All this to say I don’t know when I’ll start posting the story. I go in for surgery in two days. I’ll be in the hospital around 4 weeks recovering and doing IV treatments then another 3-ish weeks of at home recovery and rehab. I know I’ll have bad days but I will also be getting better and have good days, too. Plus the extended medical leave from my Day Job will give me time to focus on stuff I actually want to do. (Like write tooth rottingly sweet Adar m/m fanfic, thanks much.)

Whatever happens I’m looking forward to writing this fic and in a genuinely not overdramatic way, the next chapter of my life. This is the healing power of stories and characters. Life doesn’t stop and fandoms don’t exist in little snow globes separate from real life. They hold our hands on too-short work breaks and early morning rushes, in waiting rooms and even hospital beds.

I’m not deep into fandom but I’ve been having so much fun seeing post from the Adar brigade and many have given me such a warm welcome. I’m so glad to be here, with all the smutty, fluffy, tender, after dark moments that our favorite character has brought us. I just wanted to write something to show my appreciation, and encourage future me on the darker days.

[thorniest-rose]

hello 🖤 out of curiosity what kind of stuff do you consider dark? because i want to write dark stuff for steddie but don’t want backlash. i wonder if what I consider dark is too much, but to know there was an audience for certain things would really help me to go for it. ( for example i love age gaps and want to do 30-40 year old Eddie with teen Steve: dad/babysitter, rockstar/groupie, motorcycle daddy/runaway, teacher/student [dare i say stepfather/stepson sksksk] etc. but have received crit for like, 2 year difference ) and i wonder if it’s the content itself or how it’s handled? because when people write age difference/incest without highlighting how creepy the older one feels it doesn’t *feel* dark if that makes sense. (your eddie is clearly aware of what he is so there’s dark energy to it) but maybe im wrong. i would genuinely love to hear your thoughts. 🖤🖤

hi there!! oh this is such an interesting question, thank you so much.

So what do I consider dark? It's difficult in a way because everyone has different thresholds and comfort levels when it comes to fic, I have a very high threshold and not many triggers. For me, dark fic that I'm interested in reading and writing includes dysfunctional, destructive relationships where there's obsession, jealousy, codependency and control at play, but where both people like it, and don't want to change or have a healthier dynamic or set firmer boundaries. Sometimes I like reading fic about relationships that are abusive and I enjoy reading and writing fic where there's dubious consent (or even non-con) and BDSM relationships where there isn't good etiquette and where there aren't standard things like safewords. Like I love when the sub belongs to the Dom and the Dom calls all the shots and says they know what their sub needs. It's not how relationships should be irl of course, but it's all fantasy.

I love age difference fics too! I would love to write a fic with teen Steve where Eddie's in his 30s, I think that would be so wrong and hot. Like I love all the things and dynamics you've mentioned in your ask! And I think it's such a shame that people feel too frightened to write dark fic a lot of the time, or that they've been made to feel gross and weird for wanting to explore dark and more complex dynamics. Or even just enjoy things without feeling judged for it. So I'm sorry that you want to write fics like this but feel like you can't because of potential backlash. And I wish I could advise more on what things could cause backlash and what won't, because in the past I've had so much hate and abuse for things I've written but in this fandom I've had hardly any abuse at all, so it's really hard to quantify.

I would say this, completely genuinely, that I think you should write whatever you want because you shouldn't have to censor yourself or repress what you want to write. I can guarantee there will always be an audience for it, and people who will be so excited to read darker fic and dynamics. It might be a smaller audience, but it'll be very enthusiastic, and that'll make it completely worth it. If you want to be cautious too, you could have an ao3 account that's separate to your main account to post dark fic, or you could moderate comments. And if you do get shitty people, ignore them and delete any abuse you get. I've found in the past that it's when I give people air and try to engage with them that they get worse. But when I completely ignore them, they get starved of oxygen and give up. And usually if people say anything, it's just a small group of nasty people too, it'll never be as many people as you fear it could be.

There's also the chance that no one will say anything mean and people will love your fics! And if you feel passionately about your ideas, you should go for it! I'm on the cusp of posting a fic that's pretty dark, where intoxicated Steve is being used by multiple men for sex at a party, and the fic I'm writing with Azriel is probably the darkest fic in this fandom, it explores so many uncomfortable topics and will be so dead dove. And because of that we except it to have a smaller readership than a lot of other fics, but we also know the small group of people who do read it will love it, and that makes it so worth it. Plus it's so freeing to finally write a dark fic without feeling like I have to restrain myself, so you should feel free to do it too.

So please, I hope this has helped and encouraged you, even a little. And if you do write any of these fic ideas, let me know because I'd love to read them!!! <3

[witchcraftandburialdirt]

🔥 give me two , one about shipping , one about following / unfollowing — all good if you don't have an ' unpopular ' opinion per se ! just happy to hear your thoughts

✧ ━━ 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐃 "🔥" 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐀𝐍 𝐔𝐍𝐏𝐎𝐏𝐔𝐋𝐀𝐑 𝐎𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝙼𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙰𝚈 𝙿𝚁𝙾𝙼𝙿𝚃𝚂

I'm really glad you said that the opinion doesn't actually have to be unpopular because I have no idea what's considered a popular opinion or not (☛ ´∀｀*)☛ I know I'm always writing on here but I genuinely know nothing about anything on tumblr outside of the circle that I'm in, and I don't really take part of fandom except at cons. So I'll just list a few things I guess and we'll go from there ━

I don't like the idea of characters "deserving each other". I think what matters most is that the feelings are mutual and not one-sided. Not only that but sometimes people use this as a way to justify horrible things happening to said ship or between them? I dont know I'm just not a fan of the connotation.

Shipping real people feels ... icky to me, and like an invasion of privacy. I know a lot of idol/ k-pop companies push it, though. I'm not talking about "oh they look so cute!" I mean like ... 20+ minute analysis videos. If someone made one about me I'd be horrified so ━ I can't really support it being done to somebody else, even if it is innocent at heart, the feeling behind it is just ... not good.

I genuinely can't stand it when a ship that's going to inevitably be complicated and rather fucked up gets turned into a purely fluffy relationship. Granted I enjoy fluff as much as the next person, and anyone can show tenderness towards those they love, but my goodness please let the characters continue to be messed up.

Thaaat being said I can’t see any enjoyment in watching or reading two characters mercilessly abuse one another in a nonconsensual or purely hateful way. Play fighting, both being equally weird and mirroring eachother or general bickering doesn't count - obvs - but if a ship becomes abusive I'll step back from it. I know I know! But Egg you JUST said "keep the relationship and characters fucked up"! Yes! I did, and that doesn't mean that that messed up relationship is abusive or horrible for those characters specifically because its something they both enjoy/willingly take part in. Continuing about this because this is for my own tastes: Its okay to enjoy darker ships and toxic ships! This doesn't mean the person who is enjoying the content believes abuse is alright.

I find that stories that only revolve around romance tend to be extremely dull to me a lot of the time. There should be an idea of where the story is going without romance included, and if the ship comes along then it does. I think those are the ships that tend to feel the most natural since the characters interact without a specific romantic end goal in mind, which makes it all the more sweet when they do come to recognize their feelings as its come from them and not the destined plot ━ I just like it that way though and people can like whatever, y'know?

Possessiveness in ships is like ... very hit or miss for me in how it's portrayed. There's certain instances where its fun but others where it makes me wanna die. Mutual possessiveness/obsession though? Ohooho that is fun to play with, so long as it doesn't become abusive or unbalanced/unwanted by one of the parties. Man - tsk - idk anymore I feel like my opinion is so all over the place but like this all spins back to the toxic abusive relationships being a no no for me like as long as the insanity is consensual between two adults that both like it ? Yeah - that's fine. Does that make sense? I could probably go into stuff about Vladibin with this ( me and borb were talkin about it ) but I won't because I will go on forever and this is already WAYYY longer than I originally intended.

As for unfollowing it's ... whatever to me? There's obviously mutuals that if I lost I'd be really confused/wondering what happened + sad about it but I would still keep my distance; but for the most part I'm unaffected by it ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ I used to care a lot but I grew out of that within like ... 4 months. I know people grow out of their likes and what they want to view, or that they assumed my blog was something else and upon it not being what they wanted, unfollowed - which again, is valid! I don't know I just don't think unfollowing is anything personal ( like, 95% of the time ofc there's always the small percentage that is ). Don't harass people who block you or try to get around the block, things we've heard a thousand times. ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭ ̀ˋ I think though, that if you have been mutuals/friends with someone for a while and plan to unfollow - I think it would be most polite to message said friend to briefly explain why; especially since so many of us have anxiety sometimes it seems like an unfollow means the other party hates the other. It's just nice if you have a history with someone, not necessary, just polite (ง ื▿ ื)ว