#funniest bitch in the ward

[theklaapologist]

[lostreverb]

DAD!RALPH BOHNER HEADCANONS

a/n: if we're gonna call him a dilf might as well write about it! also he gives girl dad vibes so we're going with that! AND SORRY ABOUT THE ANGST I'M LIKE ADDICTED TO WRITING IT

warning: mentions of PTSD, swearing

--

• you and your four year old daughter were coincidentally on a trip to visit family when the hex happened, your husband ralph couldn't get out of work but insisted you go without him

• after everything, ralph's mental state was so poor he had to quit his job, so instead of having a nanny, ralph becomes a stay at home dad while you work

• you were reasonably uncertain if ralph was mentally stable enough to take care of a child as well as himself but he insisted he's capable

• loves you and his daughter more than anything in the world

• calls her "bub, hon, sweetpea, babygirl, little gremlin, kiddo"

• is very protective of his family (especially after the hex)

• he buys everyone evil eye necklaces and makes you wear them to keep you safe

• doesn't sleep much anymore unless he's napping with his daughter

• it's quite literally the only time he gets any kind of peaceful sleep

• you had definitely spent an entire year trying to get her sleep on her own but that's out the window now and she'll only sleep in your bed

• on the occasions he does try to get a full night's rest, ralph still gets nightmares. but when he wakes up in a sweat, seeing "his girls" cuddled up with him calms him down, sometimes enough to where he can go back to sleep

• your daughter adores her dad's grown out curls, and often raves about how they look just like hers (compared to the cropped hair he had before) and mindlessly plays with his beard when they're sat on the couch watching TV

• does funny voices when he reads stories to her

• lives for hearing + making her laugh with corny jokes (btw she thinks he's the funniest person in the world)

• practices his one man show for her and the reason you know is because she'll try and recite certain plot points to you as if that's something that happened to her

• ralph forgets to eat but when he does, it's often just whatever your daughter doesn't finish of her food or he raids the fridge at 3 am

• generally his diet consists of celsius and half eaten dino nuggets

• sends her to preschool with totems he makes for show n' tell

• you got a call at work once because she did the black magic warding chants ralph taught her with an animal skull totem and it scared some kids and made them cry

• according to your daughter it was only "like 2 people" who cried and assured you that everything was fine b/c the rest of the class thought she was "the awesomest"

• you have to tell her to stop going around telling people her dad is an expert in "getting rid of witches" b/c they think she means "bitches"

• whenever you come home to seeing your daughter sat in ralph's lap at his computer, he tells you he's just working on his one man show but he's really on reddit and other forums teaching her how to protect herself from witches

• has learned well how to dress his daughter but b/c of his sketchy appearance sometimes ppl think she's been kidnapped, especially if she starts to throw a tantrum in public and you're not around

• cared very much for billy and tommy b/c they reminded him of his daughter

• there's been times where he's particularly struggling with his PTSD and accidentally scares her and it breaks his heart

• despite this, she'll come over and try to cheer him up with one of her stuffed animals and hug him or do one of the chants he taught her because that's what her idea of protection and safety is

-----------

ANGST DRABBLE

ralph sits with his head in his hands, distraught. he had another episode, this time in front of his young daughter. seeing the look of shock and fear on her face broke his heart.

those damn witches had hell to pay for what they've done.

"daddy?" he hears a small voice say. ralph's head shoots up. his daughter, holding her favorite teddy bear (which she renamed "papa bear" after noticing how closely his new look resembles the stuffed animal) walked up to him. her eyes are still a bit glossy, but she's smiling regardless.

"hey hon..." ralph speaks softly, reaching out to stroke her hair. "what have you got there?"

she puts the teddy into his arms, searching his face for a reaction.

"is.. this for me?"

she nods and ralph gasps holding it tight.

"oh wow, thank you babygirl- c'mere-"

he pulls her in for a deep embrace, kissing her head and whispering that he's sorry and that he loves her so much. a tear falls down his cheek as he holds her small body against his, hearing her say "i love you more, daddy!" in that sweet tone of hers.

it takes everything in his power not to completely break down.

------------

FLUFF DRABBLE

after finishing dinner, you walk up the stairs, hearing the sound of chanting coming from the bedroom.

"close! remember kiddo you've got to do it twice for it to really work so let's go again- OUMMMM-"

"mommy!" at the sight of you, your daughter jumps off ralph's lap and throws her little arms around your legs.

"hi!" you respond enthusiastically, hugging her back. "just wanted to let you both know dinner was ready. what are you guys... up to?"

ralph avoids your eyes by pretending to look around the room. your daughter smiles up at you, bursting with excitement.

"daddy was teaching me-"

ralph interrupts. "dinner's ready? oh, you have perfect timing babe we're starving- uh kiddo? why don't you go wash your hands?"

"ooookayyyy!!" your daughter skips out of the room, curly ponytail swinging back and forth in time with her steps.

"again? ralph we talked about this-"

"i know, sorry..." he sighs. you notice his eyes linger on your chest.

"like what you see?" you tease, wiggling your eyebrows.

"no-! i mean- yes, of course but- you're not wearing the necklace..." he pouts.

you roll your eyes and reach into your shirt to pull the chain out.

"oh- my bad"

"yeah- now mr. bohnerrific69, could you please tell my husband that dinner's ready and he needs to actually eat tonight? because a whole pack of oreo's is not a sufficient meal."

"who told you i-?!"

ralph's gaze moves to your daughter, who's peeking past the door frame giggling.

"snitch!" ralph gasps dramatically and stands up from his desk, starting to playfully chase her down the hall. "thought you could rat me out huh? we had a deal!"

--

tags (ask to be added or removed anytime!): @fear-is-truth @juliamaximoff @jazz-berry @violetsghosts @quickreider @tiffysdeath @honeymoon8 @wcnderlnds @lacucarachapisser @xrag-dollx

[mjonthetrack]

Before anyone could take another breath, she spun around and shoved her oversized designer purse into Roman’s broad chest with a thud that made him grunt.

“Aight, Fabio, go get my shit out the trunk,” she said, barely looking at him. “And don’t be nosey ‘bout that gas can and them ropes—I brought that in case this shit was twisted. Gotta stay ready.”

Roman looked down at the bag like it had just bit him. “Who the hell is Fabio?”

She was already stomping toward Josh, ignoring him.

Josh, still holding the baby, raised a brow but said nothing as the little girl reached her arms out—clearly vibing with her auntie’s chaos like it was a lullaby.

“There go my fat-necked princess,” she cooed, snatching the baby from his arms like she’d been waiting her whole life for that moment. “Yeah, you love this crazy ass auntie energy, huh? Imani been tryna make you soft.”

Baby girl let out a wild, wheezy laugh and clapped her hands, one chubby fist smacking her auntie in the cheek.

Josh stood there blinking, caught between being offended and impressed.

That’s when the boys all reacted at once.

Solo leaned in to Jimmy, whispering low but loud enough, “Yo, who the hell is that?”

Jimmy just whistled and said, “I don’t know, but she scares me.”

Jacob was doubled over already, laughing like it was the funniest thing he’d seen since cable went out. “She said gas and ropes. Bro. What kind of welcome home package is that?!”

Roman still hadn’t moved. He just stood there, purse in hand, muttering under his breath, “What in the hell just walked into my house?”

Tasha came out the screen door, spotted her homegirl, and lit up. “Ayyyye—bitch, you made it!”

“Damn right I did,” she hollered back, bouncing the baby on her hip, completely in her element. “I had to. My baby cousin out here in the damn woods raising a family like she ain’t from Memphis. She talkin’ ‘bout she found love—I said lemme make sure he still breathin’.”

Josh smirked, arms crossed now, watching her hold his daughter like she’d been there since day one.

Imani sighed, rubbing her temples with one hand and pointing at the house with the other. “Y’all go get her room ready. This gon’ be a long-ass week.”

——

Ebony was leaned back at the kitchen table like she paid rent and set rules. Long acrylics tapping against a cold glass of sweet tea, a baby on her lap chewing on one of her knuckles, unbothered by the chaos of introductions that had come before. She had her hair in those glossy, razor-sharp finger waves, and her lashes were damn near brushing her cheekbones every time she blinked.

Tasha sat across from her, peeled fruit in a bowl between them, peeling back the years like they hadn’t missed a beat.

“So how’s Compton been?” Tasha asked, cocking her head while passing the baby a banana slice. “And how’s life been since you got out, you know… the vacation?”

Ebony cracked up. “Girl, lemme tell you. Compton still Compton, but it’s watered down. These lil’ ones don’t got no code no more. Running they mouths online and dry snitching in music videos. That ain’t how we used to do it.”

Tasha laughed, “Right! Back in the day, you had to earn a name, now they just get beat up on live.”

“And don’t get me started.” Ebony kissed the baby’s temple before casually letting it drop: “Life since I got out? Quiet, for the most part. After that five bid for manslaughter and aggravated assault, I been chillin’. On parole. Still got the ankle monitor tan line.”

Tasha choked on her water. “Girl—not the tan line!”

Meanwhile, in the living room, the guys sat on couches and armrests, beers in hand, trying not to make eye contact as the words five bid, manslaughter, and parole drifted through the house like secondhand smoke.

Imani was pacing with her hands up like she was trying to ward off spirits.

“Okay—before y’all say anything—yes, she’s… a lot.”

“A lot?!” Roman said with wide eyes, arms stretched across the back of the couch. “She came in like a deleted scene from Menace II Society. Told me to get her purse and warned me about rope and gas cans.”

“She said she brought it just in case,” Solo added, serious. “Just in case what?! The apocalypse?!”

Jacob shook his head, snickering. “Nah, I like her. She thuggin’. And baby girl love her already.”

Josh hadn’t said a word, just sitting in the armchair, arms folded tight. His jaw twitched.

Imani finally exhaled and sat next to him. “That’s my older cousin, y’all. Mama’s side. Her name Ebony. She raised hell so I ain’t have to.”

Josh squinted at her. “That’s the cousin who flipped a table at a funeral?”

“Yes,” she sighed. “Yes, it is.”

They all turned their heads when Ebony’s voice rang out from the kitchen, loud and clear:

“AND I’D DO IT AGAIN! Don’t speak on nobody while they in the damn casket if you wasn’t sayin’ it while they was alive!”

Tasha: “And that’s on everything.”

———

Solo was leaned low in his seat, beer halfway to his mouth, brows scrunched in quiet confusion as Ebony’s voice carried from the kitchen—sharp, unfiltered, and full of lived experience.

He muttered under his breath, just loud enough for the room, “She don’t even look like the prison type…”

Imani, sitting on the edge of the armrest beside Josh, gave him a quick side-eye and tried to quietly explain before her cousin caught wind. “She wasn’t raised with me in Memphis, that’s Mama’s side. Ebony grew up in Compton. Like... real Compton. Her life was different. Had to be different.”

But it was too late.

Ebony’s laugh rang out from the kitchen, a sharp “Ha!” that cut through the house like a knife dipped in hot sauce. Her acrylics clicked against the glass as she stood up with baby girl still in her arms.

“Don’t look like the prison type? Boy, lemme help you understand,” she said, stepping into the archway between the kitchen and the living room, hips swinging, baby on her hip like a prop in a hood goddess origin story.

“I caught them charges ‘cause I did exactly what I said I was gon’ do. Didn’t stutter in court, neither. Somebody put hands on my best friend—a man, mind you—so I put him through three walls and a windshield. Self-defense didn’t stick ‘cause I meant it.”

She kissed baby girl’s cheek and smiled like she’d just shared a casserole recipe.

“Aggravated assault, manslaughter. Five years. Ain’t no shame in my time—just know, I did what needed doing.”

The room went dead silent. Roman blinked like he had to reboot. Jacob mouthed damn to himself. Josh… tried to keep a straight face but failed, a smirk creeping in.

Imani groaned and dragged a hand over her face. “Ebony, can you—not lead with trauma today?”

Ebony smirked. “Ain’t trauma if I’m at peace with it, sugar. Now where y’all keep the tequila? Mama needs a pour before she puts this one down for a nap.”

Josh finally let out a laugh, standing to follow her to the kitchen. “You tryna drink before 3PM?”

Ebony smirked without missing a beat. “Boy I just met you and you already asking the right questions.”

———

The sliding glass door creaked open just enough for Ebony’s voice to slip through like smoke before she even lit up.

“Imani. Outside. Now. And bring ya damn self, not that church-lady smile you keep puttin’ on for these boys.”

The whole living room turned their heads as Imani sighed, knowing exactly what time it was. She muttered under her breath, “Lord, here she go…” but she didn’t hesitate. Tasha grabbed her own glass and followed, grinning like she already knew the vibe.

They stepped onto the front porch just as the late afternoon light settled over the compound like a slow blessing. Ebony was already posted in one of the worn rocking chairs, one thigh propped up, lighter flicked, and that good good curling up in the air before Imani even got the door fully closed.

The scent hit the inside like a wave—not what the house was used to—and back in the living room you could hear Jacob chuckling, “Ain’t no way she brought Cali air with her.”

Josh peeked out the blinds but thought better of stepping into that conversation. Solo whispered, “Somebody better go get the baby before she get a contact high,” and Roman just shook his head with a grin, “Nah, let ‘em talk. That’s kin workin’ out history.”

On the porch, Ebony exhaled slow and leaned back, her gaze sharp but soft around the edges as she looked at Imani.

“Alright. Talk to me. What’s really good, baby girl?”

Imani tried to front—arms folded, eyes on the horizon—but Ebony saw through it.

“You pregnant, engaged, living out here in damn near Wakanda woods, and I still ain’t heard how you been really. Don’t play with me.”

Tasha sipped slow, staying quiet but present.

Imani finally exhaled. “I been… tryna figure it out. Been holding it down out here. Shit wasn’t always easy, you know that. But I got my feet under me now. Got somebody who see me for real. Got family.”

Ebony nodded slow, puffing again. “Mmhmm. And you happy?”

Imani looked at her, eyes glinting with something that was both soft and steel. “I’m finally learning how to be.”

Ebony leaned forward, tapped ash off the porch rail, and looked her dead in the eye. “Then I’m proud of you, Imani Love. You made it out of what we came from, and you didn’t fold. That’s more than most. Don’t let nobody make you feel like you gotta apologize for finding peace.”

Imani didn’t say anything, but her eyes shimmered. Tasha quietly reached out and squeezed her hand.

Ebony leaned back, smirking as she took another drag. “Now go back in there and tell them boys they better treat you like royalty or they gon’ have a real Compton problem on they hands.”

————

The porch was slow-swaying, low-talking, and thick with the scent of Ebony’s rolled-up “West Coast wellness”, as she called it. Freddie Gibbs played low from her phone sitting in the cupholder of her chair—grimy, soul-sample looped, pure Compton grit. The kind of music that made the truth easier to say out loud.

She passed the blunt to Tasha without even looking, knowing full well the nurse would take it like she always did when the kids were in bed and the stars came out. They sat there like old heads in young bodies, legs crossed and comfortable, shoulders loose from the weight they both usually carried tight.

“Yo, Tash,” Ebony said, dragging slow, “real talk… this what peace feel like? 'Cause I done forgot.”

Tasha took her hit and let it out with a laugh that curled up with the smoke. “Might be. Or maybe it’s just the trees and the breeze and your baby-ass cousin finally having a man who don’t need directions to love her right.”

Ebony smirked, tapping her long nails on the arm of her chair. “Mmhmm. ‘Bout time, too. I was gon’ start sending applications out on her behalf.”

Tasha cackled, shaking her head. “You would.”

Inside the house, Imani held her daughter close, peeking out the window for a second before heading toward the kitchen. Jacob was half-listening to the porch convo through the screen, laughing under his breath.

“Yo,” he whispered to Roman, “Ebony really out there turning the porch into the set of Friday.”

Roman grinned, “Let her cook. That’s family healing.”

Out front, Ebony kicked her feet up on the rail, letting her body sink into the old wood like she belonged there.

“Y’all got somethin’ good here,” she said more quietly. “Don’t let it rot from the inside out. Keep the love loud. Keep the loyalty louder.”

Tasha looked over, surprised at the softness in Ebony’s tone. “You alright, girl?”

Ebony took one last hit before stubbing out what was left in a little glass jar. “I’m better than I been in years.”

And from the door, Josh stepped out, holding a plate stacked with late-night snacks—fruit, leftover mac, and two juice boxes on the side.

“Figured y’all might want somethin’ to hold you over,” he said, lifting the tray.

Ebony grinned wide, “Look at fiancé over here tryna keep his future aunt-in-law from burning down his porch. I see you, Playa.”

Josh chuckled, placing the plate down and easing into the porch swing.

“Long as you see I love her for real,” he said, soft but firm.

Ebony looked him dead in the eye. “I do. Now keep it that way.”

And for the first time since she’d pulled up on full Compton timing, there was silence—peaceful, earned.

[beevosmeower]

Juno harassing the public

Aka how I think she’d meet my mutuals pcs

Juno would meet Angel ( @ladyofalabyrinth ) at school school and immediately become the biggest pain in the ass. In my head they met during a quiz and she’s looking around after turning hers in unreasonably early and god forbid she locks eyes onto Angel’s quiz and is like “????” She almost gets a warning not to cheat until they see 1. It’s Juno, and 2. It’s Angel. She wouldn’t be sexual or pushy, she’s just peppy and friendly while not being an innocent damsel in distress. Tbh the only thing that would make them get to friends level in my head is Juno’s noncon ward. Yeah shes not the type of person Angel attaches to quickly, but also being around her isn’t annoying because people in town aren’t sexually harassing them when she’s around. Do I think Angel would consciously piece it together that people actively do not try to sexually harass her when Juno’s around? Probably like, a good chunk into the future when she’s already committed to being friends. No escape stage

Helena on the other hand. I fear after Helena gets in her sights Juno is passively testing grounding techniques on her that she wouldn’t notice. Silently reality pilling her with treats (funding the coquette dreams with a growing list of trinkets and “impulse buys that don’t fit whoopsies”)

Outsideeee of school however

@doldulce and Juno’s meeting is already posted but I do think it’s funny that her initial response is “Oh Brother, this guys a total freak.” Their second meeting being in an alleyway and had her slamming a guys head into a wall def doesn’t help the allegations but also they both lack any and all self preservation in the face of curiosity.

Juno and Andrea ( @ibarawr ) met at the shopping center cause she noticed her outfit and was like ooo good taste! Queue Juno somehow toeing the line between normal compliment and way too specific but flattering compliment.

Juno would see Lucian ( @lovekylarforever ) getting stalked by Kylar and be like “…? Um do you know ur being stalked? By the uh… sweaty dark haired kid. Oh you know him? Swag” Nosey asf but supportive of everyone’s thing. If you want that freakussy that’s ur prerogative!! She’s supporting it!! Lucian feels like bro would be the top subscriber to the PCverse Kylar Tracking App but instead of using it to avoid the mf, Lucian is using it to GUN for him. 

A Fish ( @deadfish-dol ) Juno interaction would be so interesting cause they both have the effect as a character to just be appearing everywhere in uncanny but vaguely helpful ways. They give the Cheshire in Alice Mare, always there, questionably helpful psychedelic cunty gothic horror jrpg NPC. Juno took one look at Fish and went “yeah ur coming with me. You’re mine now” Introvert Distribution System.

Crackles knuckles, onto @dendrofiles pcs. Callie and Juno would have the funniest dynamic cause it would mimic class of 09 “bitch gimme a fry” “is that how you ASK?” “Bitch can I PLEASE have a fry?” Those two prove that there IS room to romanticize crashing out and partying out of control in Highschool. You can pray they’ll peak in Highschool but they’re gonna peak again in college and then again afterwards.

I feel like Juno and Niko would def know each other since yk covering up stuff legally is kinda her dads thing. Niko/Wren Juno would be in a vague friendship of she’s mildly fascinated with him and low key getting her into shit would be it’ll be WAY less easy to kill people out here. Smh the unfairness

As for Angelo ( @hysterical-luxury ) .. man good luck. Juno would lock onto them ESPPPP as a new student? Bros NOT getting away 😭 … She’d be like Oo new person! Hang on for an emotional roller coaster but hey you have a friend and ally for life. Juno is absolutely forcing meetings with him though, it’s the same vein as Angel where she’s very intentionally showing up in their path constantly. “Funny seeing you again!” (She knows damn well you were gonna be in this area). As for Faline…. Um.. Juno has to be kept from Faline or else she’d live up to her emotional carpet bomb title. (I love Faline but all my pcs would break the vague warped mental Nirvana he has.) Cherry and Juno would meet through her dol introduction of dragging Juno into an alleyway, girl will 100% agree to sex if propositioned cause ell o ell why not? Spinning around a breeding comment in my head at the end of their encounter cause girliepop was def told before being released onto the public to not get pregnant, so if Cherry wants her to try and get her pregnant she is DOWN to defy science!! Also rapidly spinning around Princess in my head too. I feel like Cherry and Princess would be pretty regular friends with Juno since they all have pretty parallel demeanors. Princess and her would have a horrible first meeting though since Avery approaches Juno a lot considering how much he works with her father with the sheer amount of hit and runs he has to deal with from Avery… I have another post cooking on it but the man would shamelessly approach his “honorary niece” despite having his sugar baby with him smh.

[milf--adjacent]

It's really funny watching these self-proclaimed free-thinking, reasonable, informed people dog pile me for calling someone who was needlessly rude to me a bitch with the same force people did when ratliker got found out for race posing (among other things) without even looking at the context. Dogpile and racist/transphobe-jacket a trans woman over an argument that literally wasn't even an argument! That's how we end transmisogyny!

"I'm a Marxist!" is probably the funniest thing they keep repeating, as if it is a ward against evil, a reason for behaving like junior high bullies.

[gastlives]

HELP

wow cool to know ure one of the peoples who Watched that happen

it needs to be done...

thatd be.. Something

a PREDATOR>… also girl bye

bitch go away

Thats the funniest way to put ppl u hate also its good that u dont care abt her anymore… SHES the one obsessed w U

hold on was the red haired kid clockblocker… thatd be funny

wooow

thatd be really awesome if there werent ppl around

yea ure just being annoying now when a lot of ppl jjust went thru shit as well

its sooo funny when ure a Villain and the Random Bully at school thinks shes higher than u in terms of worthiness

this is great

ha

oh man and sophia was a whole another shit, at least emma wasnt a ward

still crazy taht shes telling her like hey MAYBE if u werent a VICTIM u couldve been my FRIEND Still

oh shes going OOOFF

?

oh cmon ive SEEN how her dad is he isnt thinking of that the thing is is that Taylor is the one that went out, not her dad, he didnt become distant, she did because of VILLAIN shit

woooow

violence huh?

lol why on earth would she go

bye emmaaa

help its funny shes like huh this never happened to me before is this a trap? nah

god thatd be insane

yea see

stupid AND dangerous bc self defense

OH SHIT

LMAO HORRIBLE TIMING FOR U

nah…

this is so funny

gotta be pragmatic abt this

and practical

DAMMMN

um

omg…?

[oceanautismrosenberg]

Decided I wanted to participate in this !!

Favourite production? : If there was a 2015 Chicago slime tutorial I'm sure it would be that one, because every time I see content of them I go NUTS and I love their Ricky, another thing I love from the Chicago production is how special it was for RTC History in theater itself, since it was the first american production ever. I also love 2016 production (who doesn't? /genq), Stone Production and South Playhouse Production. Stone Production has a really special place in my heart since I discovered RTC because of them :) It makes me so happy! I also really love 2009 production because heheh play to win and lala love <3

Favourite character? : OCEAN!!! I'm literally obsessed guys I can't. I giggle and kick my feet every time I see content of her!!!!! Second place is taken by Ricky and third it's fighted between Mischa and Connie. It truly depends of my mood.

Least favourite character? : Hope I don't get jumped but Noel . . . I'M NOT EVEN SURE WHY!!! I just can't care a lot about him :( This DOESN'T mean I don't love him at all, because I love EVERY SINGLE of the characters, but I just... I dunno, he's not so special in my heart I guess. AGAIN, I LOVE HIM A LOT BUT STILL

Favourite song? : Space Age Bachelor Man. I just. I just don't understand how EVERY single version of SABM is absolutely PERFECT. Such a vibe.

Least favourite song? : I would say The New Birthday Song; when I listen to it when I'm watching the show I shred tears sure but I wouldn't really listen to it (? If that makes any sense.

How would you rank the opening songs? : Okay this is really difficult but for me it is Fall Fair Suite (2015 then 2016) -> Tragic Fact -> Waiting For The Drop -> Uranium Suite (2019 and above) -> U-R-A-N-I-U-M

Favourite cut song? : My demons are fighting because I can't decide between "Play to Win" or "LaLa Love". They are both bangers okay leave me alone. (2025 EDIT: ok fuck it none of them i love small things become big things)

Favourite cut character? : HANK, TOTALLY HANK!! I also have a thing for Trishna and I'm not even sure why because we don't really have a lot of information about her but my heart flutters when I see that one screenshot of her singing on Play To Win (EDIT 2025: I now happen to have a Trishna hyperfixation so strong I had an episode over her. Interesting. Still love Hank tho)

Unpopular opinion? Or if you don't have any, a popular opinion you agree with? : Ocean IS a bad person, but not a fricking monster like a lot of people represent her on fanfiction or fanmedia. She IS wrong about a lot of things but she isn't insensitive about what she says; if we are talking about WTWN, let's remember Ocean thought that Karnak was the one voting, so she had to give him reasons about why she should be voted. She was a bitch when doing it? TOTALLY because why the fuck would you be like that to Ricky and Connie tf but a lot of people make her look like the worst person ever living on earth if that makes sense (even if she is the worst person in the play ofc)

Favourite ship? : Perfectcloud, I'm obsessed with them. Second place is taken by Spacerap and third by Perfectdolls. I also really like platonic Spacedolls, they are besties fr trust

Least favourite ship/ship that you don't understand the hype for? : I would say NestingDolls. Sorry guys I just don't get it.

Favourite RTC actor(s)? : Tiffany Tatreau (<3), Adam Standley, Addy Ward and Ella Culbreath.

Favourite representation of [insert ship]? : Stone Productions blackrose makes me cry I swear to god. Really.

Favourite interpretation of [insert character]? : Adam's representation of Mischa is the funniest thing ever I'm in love with it. Like he's so good doing the accent I swear

Favourite take on [insert song]? : Danny Bó's and Alex Wyse's space age bachelor man. Alex's high note it's the best thing ever and Danny's acting is hilarious I really like it. I also like Benjamin Michael Hall's take on Noel's Lament since it's really different about what we are all used to on NL's performances. Honorific mention of Adam Standley's TSIA because it's bad on purpose and really gives the Youtube 2009 rapper vibe.

Favourite costumes/set design? : 2016 Space Age Bachelor Man. The giant wig. Just. Just the giant wig makes it absolutely awesome.

Favourite vocal performance? : Tiffany Tatreau's and Gus Halper's. They are AMAZING. Never forget Emily Rhom's tho, because I'll always be impressed of it.

What are your headcanons for [insert character]? : Autistic hyperverbal Ocean. That's it that's the hc. (I'm autistic myself and I really see Ocean as one too because I noticed a lot of traits of hers)

Do you have any theories? : Jane Doe was Penny Lamb BEFORE dying :3

Favourite RTC fanfic/fic author/fic recs in general? : kermitkc (Take The Plunge (SORRY I KNOW IT IS A SMUTFIC BUT IT LITERALLY MADE ME CRY I HAD TO MENTION IT), The Perfect Date and Maybe the Real Cookies Were the Friends We Made Along the Way), waitinginthemilkweed (Carnations), StarClanlight (Can We Kiss? and Don't Touch Me, Please), Maven_O ("Something about the way he moves, attracts me like no other lover,") and junoharu (equinox)

Favourite RTC fanart/fanartist/any fanart you love? : enter-the-rickyverse and Chair Parasites/Ranella Chair !!

Do you have any OCs? If so what are they like? : . . . No :( but I'm planning on doing one!

What would your catchphrase be and/or what 'The ___ in Town' would you be called? : "Wait, wait, wait . . . Wait a minute or I'll go on short-circuit... You know- BZSBBSZBSZBZSB *computer noises*" - The Weirdest/Nerdiest girl In Town. I just know I'm a nerd I have to accept it *cries in computer nerd*

Favourite line of dialogue? : "Romeo and Juliet, teen sex kills!", "I lay my masculinity, to the altar of your maidenhood . . .", "Live and let live! Love at let love! For love is the closest you can come to another person, because its the closest you can come to being another person.", "I urge you to make the responsible choice here, for the betterment of humanity."

Something you haven't seen in a production that you want to? : Ocean with a fan, haven't seen it since the american productions.

Any underrated productions you love? : Stone Productions, AGAIN!!! I just can't understand how people almost never talk about them.

How many productions have you watched? Which ones? : I think I watched 5 of them: 2016 American NYC, Stone Production, Stagecraft Production, Station Theater and listened to South Playhouse's.

Have you ever been to see a RTC production? : No :( In argentina we just had one and it was on Buenos Aires, where I don't live.

If you were in a production of RTC, who would you play? : RICKY POTTS. I WOULD *KILL* TO PLAY RICKY POTTS.

Overall favourite part of RTC and/or the fandom? : Its actual meaning. Ride The Cyclone was invented for the mere purpose of giving theater a twist, and it completely made it! A lot of people can interpret this show in their own special way, and that's what probably makes it so special. Ride The Cyclone is the best way to portray a lot of topics at the same time, spreading taboo topics as normal (death and sex specially.) They make the characters AND the audience explore themselves, without being ashamed because "that was it"; they already died and they had this opportunity of express their individuality and THEY KILLED IT WHEN DOING SO! I just really admire Jacob Richmond for his job when creating this play, and the whole team that it involved.

Ride The Cyclone Ask Game!!!

Just some fun little questions!! Please do rant as much as you want with any and all of your answers :D

Favourite production?

Favourite character?

Least favourite character?

Favourite song?

Least favourite song?

How would you rank the opening songs?

Favourite cut song?

Favourite cut character?

Unpopular opinion? Or if you don't have any, a popular opinion you agree with?

Favourite ship?

Least favourite ship/ship that you don't understand the hype for?

Favourite RTC actor(s)?

Favourite representation of [insert ship]?

Favourite interpretation of [insert character]?

Favourite take on [insert song]?

Favourite costumes/set design?

Favourite vocal performance?

What are your headcanons for [insert character]?

Do you have any theories?

Favourite RTC fanfic/fic author/fic recs in general?

Favourite RTC fanart/fanartist/any fanart you love?

Do you have any OCs? If so what are they like?

What would your catchphrase be and/or what 'The ___ in Town' would you be called?

Favourite line of dialogue?

Something you haven't seen in a production that you want to?

Any underrated productions you love?

How many productions have you watched? Which ones?

Have you ever been to see a RTC production?

If you were in a production of RTC, who would you play?

Overall favourite part of RTC and/or the fandom?

[theklaapologist]

Virus and Trip

[bananathebookworm]

TLOVM Season 2 Eps 4-6 Ramblings

EP. 4

- More baby twins. I love getting to see these flashbacks of things that were only briefly mentioned during the campaign.

- Trinket origin story! Baby trinket is so adorable.

- Ugh... and right back into this absolutely brutal moment. The first of several moments that are going to be absolutely gut wrenching to see animated.

- Trinket defending his mama. 

- “Take me instead you Raven bitch.” Love that they keep these iconic lines from the campaign.

- “Holy shit, I’m amazing.” Humble as ever Kash.

- Love Vex laughing in response to them telling her she died. Because sometimes it’s the only way to process things.

- Vax getting Death Walker’s Ward. And thus the decision that seals Vax’s fate in the end.

- Zahra is so cool. I love her.

- Vax’s flashbacks to the Calamity... I really hope we get a Calamity film at some point.

- And a passing of the torch from Purvan to Vax. Going from Vax getting the shit beat out of him, to him then accepting his fate and coming back and saving everyone. I love it so much.

- The tensions between Percy and Vax beginning... 

- The necklace for Trinket!

- Was not expecting that little jumpscare at all... though I really like them adding these Calamity flashbacks as part of becoming the new Champion of the Matron of Ravens.

- Westruun in flames...

EP. 5

- BABY KEYLETH! 

- “Pass through fire” reference. I’m a little sad that the context has changed so much, but I appreciate that the sentiment still exists in this world. I guess this also means we won’t be seeing Kerrek at all. (Which makes sense given Lyra and Thorbir were also cut.)

- Grog and Kraven Edge. Simultaneously the funniest and most terrifying relationship in the show. Also love that they included the Grog and Scanlan convo.

- Pike and Grog singing together! I love it.

- And the secrets of the broom unlocked!

- Was Vax this much of an asshole during this part of the campaign? I don’t remember him being this much of a dick towards Keyleth...

- KIMA AND ALLURA! HELL YES!

- “You know what you fight fire with?” “Fire?” “Me.” Never change Grog.

- “We can certainly try.” Fucking incredible. I love it so much.

- I love any time Percy loses his cool. 

- ALLURA. FUCKING. VYSOREN.

- I have very little recollection of Keyleth and her dad together in campaign, so I love getting to see them together here.

- I wonder if between the Vox Machina and the Mighty Nein series we’ll get to see Keyleth and her mother reunite.

- Keyleth is the best member of the team. I will not be taking any questions or criticisms.

- Seeing Keyleth’s new look, my brain immediately goes to getting the red tunic to resist fire in Ocarina of Time...

- Plane shifting beginnings.

EP. 6

- And now getting into Grog’s backstory a little more. I love that season one was them solidifying them as a team, and now season two is letting us see more into their individual backstories.

- Oh Percy...

- My recollection is that Scanlan never let anyone manhandle him in the campaign. He always insisted that everyone else heal themselves first and refused to be picked up most of the time. (With the occasional exception during battle like the fast-ball special.)

- Kraven Edge is terrifying

- Sphinxes are so cool

- Arcane Piano. This is ridiculous and amazing all at once.

- During the campaign I never stopped to consider what it actually looks like when Scanlan stop to sing in the middle of battle.

- Scanlan bonding with the Sphinx was not what I expected from this trial. But I love it.

- MYTHCARVER! Time to slay a Pit Fiend.

- Not as brutal as ending on Liam/Vax’s sobs last week, but that was still awful. 

- I'm interested to see where this goes because so far Pike is their only healer, unlike the campaign where Vex, Scanlan, and Keyleth were also able to heal when needed.

[professeurm]

i agree so much.

i feel like we can compare house and will, in sense that they're both fantastic at their job because of their special ability (the power of austim😂). both do their job better then anyone who is employ in their position. both cuddy and jack, despite seeing that these two arent well and need serious help, keep them on the job even when ppl ask "why are they're here". they (still talking about cuddy and jack) both show that they are worry for them, checking up on them and what not.

they both pop pills non-stop, if im correct its painkillers for will too. they both end up in jail and in psych ward. they keep to themselves, isolate from everyone who cares. they're both crazy and accepts that the only good life they will ever have is with their doctor friend. they both look like a hot mess

wilson and hannibal can be compare in the sense that they mask who they really are. they're both social butterfly, brilliant doctors and can pull bitches if they want 😂. both are enablers and want the best for their patients. they're also troublemakers who gets away with literally anything because why the hell would a cute, brilliant man do anything like that? obv both house and will seeing through their bullshit

they both focus heavily on their hygiene and looks, making sure they look presentable. they took interested in their friend (house and will) because hanging out with them has been so much fun, the funniest they ever have. both end up in jail (obv different jails for big reasons). they're surprisingly calm unless push to their limit then they'll snap

they're pretty close with cuddy and jack. they both mess around with house and will. they both have drugged them. there only friend is a nutjob but they love them anyway. and if i recall i think both, wilson and hannibal, has done what they believe is right for them (house and will) many times despite it not being right at all.

i feel like hannigram was more of these two are bond in body and mind while hilson was more of these two are bond in soul. if that makes sense

There’s something so similar about Hannigram and Hilson. They’re so tragic, their love language is abuse. Yet they’re the most profound relationships of their respective shows and both of the shows come to end with focus on these relationships. But there’s also like a clear difference with the relationships and how they were handled, that I’m not sure I know how to describe. I honestly wouldn’t even say it’s that Hilson wasn’t canon queer, cuz it kinda was.

Hannigram was purposefully canonically queer and Hilson was accidentally canonically queer.

[asexual-juliet]

i love making fun of the oc pilot as much as the next person but it’s actually so fucking iconic?? ryan has literally never looked cuter than he did in that white v-neck, grey sweatshirt, leather jacket and choker. luke ward gave us the funniest fucking line of the entire series when he said “welcome to the oc, bitch!!” yes i can’t watch the “who are you?” “whoever you want me to be” scene without losing my shit but they both looked cute as fuck while it was happening!! they went off with “where I'm from, having a dream doesn't make you smart. knowing it won't come true? that does.” “hey, do you want to play grand theft auto? it’s pretty cool. you can, like, steal cars and… not that that's cool… or uncool. I don't know” makes me smile every time. “oh, hey…cocaine. that’s awesome” makes me lose my shit. sandy teaching ryan how to tie a tie... ryan knowing seth for like eight hours and essentially saying “well i guess i’m ride or die for this dumbass now”... seth hugging ryan when he says he has to leave... the scene where sandy is driving ryan back to chino and they pull out of the driveway and see marissa waiting in her own driveway, haloed by sunlight like a fucking goddess... as a society, are we ready to admit that the oc pilot is actually Good Shit???

[spindash]

everybody so mean to judith ward like she isnt the funniest bitch ever

[haganez]

one of the funniest moments at the worst times is when i was getting checked out of the psych ward and my mom was acting like a bitch as usual and the guy at the desk looks at me and is like "is she why youre here" and i just nod my head solemnly

[il3x]

I know she gets [REDACTED] in Ward but I also know she has an epilogue, so she probably survives or gets reanimated. Reanimation is the funniest option though. you've been fatalistic for years but the world keeps showing you up against all odds to the point that some faerie bitch hauls you back to life by the scruff of your spiritual neck. can you IMAGINE

tfw you're resigned to your death and then the world ends and you're still fucking there. how many knife-edge misses, now? you're starting to believe it won't ever take you. death is cheating you. are you stuck in this limbo forever? you're sick of waiting. you're sick of just fucking waiting.

you're starting to believe it won't ever take you.

and you're left in a world scoured raw, in this blank space of a body that's just there to carry your scars.

oh well. the waves won't ever stop coming, so you have work to do.

[scary-lasagna]

ThanksKilling [Pt. IIII]

___ The creeps finally have a nice meal together ___

An hour later, and the dining hall was filled with scents of pumpkin, turkey, ham, roasted chicken, and lively lighting from the warm chandelier, it gave a sense of security to those peacefully chattering over their feast. A miracle was deemed that no one has killed each other yet, and everyone seemed to decently be getting along. Conversations overlapped each other, and there wasn't a singular conversation through the 30+ dining seats; Everyone seemed to be in their own ombre groups, talking over the table and calling down the lines of seats to their friends. 

"I still can't believe that Slender and Zalgo had a baby."

"We didn't conceive a child, Ben. Rake was made with pure magic and wishful thinking." Slender spoke over the chatter of the dining hall, and has been popping in and out of guest's conversations regularly. The being in question was weaving in and out of chairs, picking up table scrapes and nearly nicking fingers who dared to share their food despite the specially ordered cherries they beloved.

Words faded in and out as creeps exchanged bonds, well-wishes, and fond inside jokes everyone seemed to know of.

"Aw!~ Cmon, Jackie, no one's gonna judge you! Everyone eats rare steak now and then." Nina cooed with an encouraging shoulder pat, and the poor eyeless demon responded with a sigh and a poke at the raw meat on his blood-stained plate with upturned brows. Nina was encouraging, but maybe...he'll just save it for later. 

"And then he said 'I'm pickle rick'...funniest shit I ever saw." Silver merely stared politely at the blue jester, and wished BEN would drag him out of the god-forsaken conversation.

In the seats across from Silver and Candypop, BEN has reached his own dilemma, "Jeff, my hand's stuck in the turkey."

"You're a ghost, bro."

"Oh, yeah, haha." Ben popped his wrist-deep hand out of the turkey, offering a handful of stuffing to Jeff's plate.

"So," Kagekao hummed, smirking under his mask, "Who wants to talk about politics?"

A chorus of no's and 'fuck off's' erupted, excluding the agreement from Zalgo and Laughing Jack, who purely came to stir chaos among the creeps.

"You know Slender, I have to admit I extremely underestimated how this night would go." Zalgo set his utensil down, and wiped the blood off of his lips with a neatly folded napkin.

"Well, just let this be a lesson when trying to-"

"Please do me a favor and never invite me over again, this is incredibly boring and I have not seen a single death tonight."

"Would you like to experience one? Because I'll kick this turkey leg so far up your-"

"Mother! Oh, have I ever told you how much I love you?!" Splendor chimed in at the perfect time, and pressed a cheek to his mother's temple.

"Yeah, keep kissing ass for Christmas, Splen." Offender took a seat next to Jane, "Hello my favorite lesbian!"

"Don't ever refer to me like that again."

"What's wrong with lesbians?!" Jeff exclaimed, "They just like other girls, there's nothing wrong with that." The raven-haired man shrugged with sass, and took a bite of marshmallow-topped yam. It caught some attention, and even a disinterested Helen looked up from his chived-mashed potatoes.

"Jeffery, you dumb soulless bitch, I'm a lesbian." Jane placed a manicured hand over her heart.

"Well, congratulations, Jane, you're not as much of an asshole as I thought you were."

Jane paused for a moment and finally exhaled, dropping the conversation to return to her knife talk with Tim. 

"TiiiIIMM!! Can I have the 'tates please?" Toby reached across the table, teetering one of the candle holders in the process.

"Yeah, just don't set the table runner on fire." The brunette grumbled and handed over the glass bull of onion and chive flavored mash potatoes. The table runner would be better set on fire. It was far from returning to a smooth velvet, and the messy housemates have all left their lasting decorations on the poor piece of fabric. 

After the feast, the creeps retreated to their own circles to rest and digest the wide arrange of food that was presented to them. Some slept on each other, and some we're forced onto the floor by their friends after some calming gaming, art, or whatever those silly creeps like to do in their downtime.

Zalgo and Slender departed with a not-so-friendly handshake, although the king was extremely appreciative of the invite, even if he expressed mixed signals.

Toby had a peaceful sleep, wrapped up in a pile of jackets and blankets to ward away any brewing nightmares. And Jane decided to be kind enough and return Jeff's broken dog tag that fell off in a fit of laughter.

The Rake? Well, they snuggled close to Clockwork that night.

What matters is that they spent their well-meant time together, and no one had to do the dishes that night.

[nebulations]

[ID: An excerpt from the transcript of episode 22: Ingratitude from I Am In Eskew. It reads:

I scoop my daughter up, lifting her back into bed and settling the covers around her, and I address her with comforting words that seem to settle the issue of the objective non-existence of monsters while glossing over the trickier nuances of what constitutes a monster and whether we can ever truly trust the evidence of our own eyes.

I don't look up at the ceiling, of course. I'm not stupid. End ID]