#fun???? just to watch her suffer??????
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needed this scene in video version bc gifs just could not do it justice esp jung mo eum's laughter which added 10 years to my lifespan
#love next door#moon talks#she's just there to beat his ass and enjoy watching him suffer#she's just like me fr#the way she paused made sure she took her shot perfectly#then dropped seok ryu's name like a bomb and watched as seung hyo exploded in front of her eyes#she's so fun!!!! she's so funny i aM IN LOVE
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much ado about pleasure
#bonk.png#undescribed#i was a teenage exocolonist#iwatec#iwatex#exocolonist#iwatex spoilers#iwatec spoilers#<- very vaguely in the art#hi i havent drawn stuff for exocolonist in a year n played it in two but been thinking about sol again v-v#lyrics from n obviously a redraw of real end of hatsune miku#sym was a fucking nightmare to drawn bc of how simplistic my style is while tammy was a lot easier bc she has more traits i draw normally#fun detail is that i basically drew sym n tammy's mouth n eyes the same way of like erasing a bit to make them look fuller/softer#anyway thoughts drew this bc whenever i personally think n play around with sol its almost exclusively when theyve been in the loop for so#long that they fundamentally cant separate themself from it or their other lives but the suffering caused by it has looped around#so theyre basically a normal functioning person outside of stuff directly related to the loop n a few things#n then like. they gotta be fucking weird about tammy n sym right? like sym for more obviously reasons cosmically linked whatever#but commonalities are 1. the only characters you cant lose affection with/2. always love sol no matter what#3. generally very positive sweethearts n 4. You Have To Watch Them Die At Least Once#so i think sol would be fucking weird about both of them like hating urself bc u unintentionally caused the deaths of everyone you care abou#t? dw! these two pink bitches (i know sym is purple) love you no matter what!!#very intentional that tammy is her child design her but sol's their teen design just bc thats my fav look of theirs#one last thing its more visible here but the way i draw sol's eyes is that their irises go over their lower lid i do this bc it looks weird
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Go play pretend on your own (Patreon)
#Doodles#Helix#Dexter Favin#Coraline#The Beldam#The other side of this coin <3 Call him out but this time make it unfriendly hehe#I talked last time about the daring rescue!! I do love the daring rescue in Coraline AUs ah same thing with the Camp Camp Coraline AU haha#Burst in through the door! Those poor hinges!#It is a bit funny imagining him crawling through the tunnel in a hurry and kicking the doors open all winded haha <3#It's all very serious of course Max needs help! Stuck behind the mirror from disobeying perhaps?#I was pretty hard on him last time that he'd just Immediately give up his soul for cheap tricks but like - would he?#Yes he's reckless and foolish but he's also stubborn and prideful and hates being told what to do so there's that lol#Which does he want more! The high or his freedom to refuse? I could see it going either way#And for Dex's sake I would hope he'd refuse! As if he hasn't suffered enough eye trauma (eventually)#Ough the thought of him starting to say yes and getting one button eye in and then rescinding his yes ouch#Doomed to have one eye no matter where he goes ah 💔#Anyway - Dex!!! Watch I'll make another one with the ideas mentioned here and then talk about more ideas in those tags pft#Since agreeing with him didn't work how about shaming? ''Go away you're no better''#She really is going hard on him like ''What's your angle? You get him back and then what? Will that actually fix anything?''#Very much pulling from Dexter's meetings with Max at the Institute there hhhhhh as if I needed more feelings about it#Eco_Mono did such a beautiful job playing Dex - so much to consider hehe - but there was one question that I can't stop thinking about#''Why would you want him back?'' and Dexter didn't really have much of an answer - he was barely more than a concept at the time!#Having had the opportunity to see his character grow into himself has given me Such brainworms about that question ♥♪♫#Very want to explore it <3#In the meanwhile it's fun to pit these two against each other haha what an odd matchup ♪#I've only barely drawn the Beldam before now that I think of it! And I think only in her final metal-spidery form never in her mid form here#She's fun :D And so tall! Dexter finally feeling small for a change haha#Her having to fight adult selfishness would be quite interesting I think - something tinged with but not quite the same as loyalty#She can relate to the possessiveness at least hehe I'm sure he'd appreciate the comparison
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i have officially returned. ask me anything.
#random thoughts#i'll probably answer it tomorrow because i'm tired. i don't know why.#ciel if you see this i've been nicer to myself these past few days following your birthday. taking care of myself in general aspects.#which i sort of hate myself for but it's okay because. uh. i won't be like this forever. i'll be better at what i'm trying to do i promise.#new year's resolution is not fucking with me.........#oh also!! i've been sort of feeling like a dead person at times. and also like a cockroach. i have had to repeatedly tell myself that#i'm not dead i'm not dead!!!!#because i'm not. obviously. and i know i'm not. my brain is just silly. it likes to tell me i am things i am not like book characters.#and recently my mother got me my own rosary and we've been practicing praying together with my brother.#can you imagine how bad it must be for me to turn to christianity as a coping mechanism? not even when i was terrorized with death thoughts#not even in august for fuck's sake.#but it's actually not that bad. though i think i like the idea of organized religion more than i like being a part of it.#also i feel like my being catholic (mostly non-practicing) is betraying the queer community somehow. like. queer people have suffered#so much because of the christian church in general. so it's like. being christian is weird when i'm also queer.#but also then i feel weird when i try to do things in relation to christianity. like. put saint in my artist name.#that feels blasphemous i don't know. is it?????? it's not that serious either way but. augh.#i am going to write a song about this. also fellow christians is it okay to use the lyric 'uselessly clutching her rosary' or is that bad?#because i mean. technically. the she i'm referring to sort of is. because god isn't solving any of our problems.#he's just fucking. watching. if he's even real.#(and no my disappearance isn't related to the catholicism thing it's something else. as in the one thing i haven't told anyone else but cie#and an irl friend. if you are ciel then i am completely open to talking about said thing.#otherwise i will continue to drop cryptic little notes on my blog because I AM SILLY. {: )#going to play roblox now and maybe say hello to you fuckers on discord for a bit of fun. goodbye.
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*violently trembling* i need…. to find twilight princess for the wii… *gets shot by the ‘but you said you would finally play this one game!’ gun*
#bw2 is important bc it is new. but also like#over the summer i kinda wanna play something on the big screen that would interest my lil sister#she loves botw and totk but i doubt would have any interest in the rest of the zelda series#she’s very much a gamer who loves to screw around and fight enemies in an open world#i mean she does love cool plot stuff but like. she doesn’t get SO invested that she’d suffer gameplay she didn’t like just for it like me#but like in terms of that i think twilight princess for her would be the best gateway drug#i mean even if she never wanted to play she could at least watch me and have fun hanging out#here’s the main problem. that game is literally like 18 years old HDHDBXJDBSNNSNDSHSJD where am i gonna find a functional disc for sale#when i played two years ago i borrowed it. wonder if my older sister is still in contact w that person… probably not#peach rambles
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Friends, my time has come.
I mean, it's a shame there's no option for "you sold me a computer infested with demons and basically your idea of tech support is 'Wow, sucks to be you'" but I made do with what I had. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#georgette#computer issues#computer problems#ohhh dell you did not want to give me a survey about how happy i am with my ~*~dell experience~*~#i told it like it is#ooo but maybe i'll win the laptop!!!!!#maybe it'll you know explode in my face or something super fun like that????? 🤞😖🤞😂#aislynn's cause of death: dell computer#i would not be surprised#i'm more shocked i haven't had an actual literal health crisis over this past half a year of hell#of course i'm also constantly sick these days so maybe that's speaking too soon I DUNNO#ironically though georgette is doing a little better right now but that can change if i breathe her way you know?#but i still gave them my opinion straight to the face#i have truly suffered with this#as melodramatic as that sounds to say#my computer is my way to access the world#not just for entertainment but to help my elderly family members#i'm extremely hampered without it and not being able to know if it was going to crash in the middle of paying a bill or something#has been super stressful#i don't know if i'll ever be able to vid or make GIFs again#i don't know if she'll ever tolerate vegas#it's just a shame because on paper she should be an absolute beast#and instead she can crash with one tab open watching a youtube video#ageless aislynn
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Things that aren’t red flags but are flags nonetheless
#Chakotay & T'Pel: Why Are We Here....? Just To Suffer.....???#My jaw DROPPED when Janeway called her dad 'daddy' in that episode ...ilaughedso hard....#more power to ppl who call their dads daddy into adulthood - I'm a no dad haver so I cannot imagine#sorry Tuvok this drawing is really a prime example of 'buddy system responsible for additional death'#mutually assured destruction: If Janeway brings up that Tuvok calls his mom that he's gonna bring up that Janeway calls her dad that#Chakotay calls his parents 'mom & dad' while T'Pel calls her parents 'ma & pa' <- vulcan version of this#something I notice about watching voyager is everyone calls their parents 'mother & father' which is incorrect - sorry v_v#anyway this made me laugh todraw....hope you enjoy#bea art tag#Chakotay#T'Pel#Janeway#Tuvok#st voyager#st voyager art#DON'T @me if Janeways dad wasn't an admiral#Chakotay wants to make fun of them so fucking bad especially Janeway but he KNOWS she'll get mad HHEHEHE
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two hrs until arle animated trailer save me
#WHO IS THAT GIRL#ramblings!#if she turns out to be a normal human and actually arles sad over her death and its just oh no sob story backstory#then i will not know how to feel#tbh that's also kind of scara's backstory and his ends in anger and fire so maybe there's hope#i also NEED someone else other than ashi.kai to start making arle theories god. i dont want to keep watching and not liking her vids#also besides all of this i know everyone's like boohoo other x.iao ships are suffering but i just find it extremely funny that x/traveler i#becoming ''''more'''''' canon by the day. his birthday mail this year is so egregious#waiting patiently for my dream solvent bc apep is giving me Shit Drops for neuv#also the desc for dream solvents is like. dreams used to have material form. if u wake up clutching a flower after dreaming of heaven#the flower was made from the dream. and then x fucking sends us a dream solvent?#my guy. what are you trying to say.#anyways. highly entertaining i think it's fun. will not stop me from shipping other ships but this casual slowburn is fun
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someohow even after all this time it feels like people are still managing to come out of the woodwork day and night to reveal that they don't give half a shit about human life, justice, mercy, dignity, equality....kidnlt old men i follow on fucking youtube will unmask themselves as violent racists who want palestinian children dead. my family is either to cowardly and self-absorbed to be informed about anything or they're slobbering for an easy answer so they can go back to tuning things out and pretending everything is or ever was fine. even my mom wants to desperately cling to kamala being Somehow Different. even supposedly/historically left media is just trying to fucking manifest it. we promise she's different guys we promise based on nothing because we want her to be different and in that we're revealing that our best case scenario is for a liberal one step left of center will say genocide is bad and then go back to imperial business as usual and we can all go back to playing american econimic socialist because i guess all of our morals and everything we stood for was just play pretend the entire fucking time.
#weeks ago i was watching to fucking majority report because i hate myself#and i just hear emma vigeland echoing in my head because someone called her on this spineless bullshit. calls her on kamala being no#different. same old genocide support but with more frowning and empty insulting hand waves towards the suffering of the palestinian people#and she says if they think there's no substantive difference they “just don't want to vote for a democrat.” and i want to rip my skin off#no you just want to vote for one. desperately. you want to feel like everything will be okay. you want to stop thinking about this so badly#that you will happily blind yourself and say lets go mamala and jump back on american fucking patriotism and try to drag you base along too#all of these ghouls just want the good old days where they can make fun of conservatives in peace and allude vaguely to thinking past#atrocities were bad. and i literally can't fucking stand it anymore
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I would also be cool if Barry and Iris just like... pulled their children out of the timeline like Wally did for his kids.
If that happened then they'd be the same age as Irey and Jai.
There is no doubt in my mind that the tornado twins will either be the same age as the west twins or the same age as Wally's new baby.
They're setting up a cousin/childhood friends situation with the younger Wests and Allens. And they're paralleling Wally and Barry.
#i actually like this one better tbh#put the twins at 8 yo with Irey and Jai#combine the twins#they are now the quadruplets. rogues beware#i think itd be fun if you just have this pack of chaos children. bonded in blood. unmoored from time. forged in lightning. late for dinner#just peak hijinks material#and im all about the hijinks#look i know barry never met his kids before he (and they) died. and i know Iris raised them solo before she had to watch them die as well#im just saying why make her birth twins twice#hasn't she suffered enough?#Bart's unmoored from time. if they take the twins from the timeline to raise them together then Bart will be fine#he won't marty mcfly. hes immune. hes good#so anyway let Iris fuck with the timeline and get her kids back#dc#dc comics#the flash#barry allen#wally west#kid flash#tornado twins#iris west#iris west allen#irey west#jai west
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convinced some fic writers hate betty or something bc why are there so many fics that undo the cartagena arc and then have her reject the presidency and then have her insist that armando have it? i know ive complained about this before but im doing it again.
#ppl say its hard to watch him suffer as if it was easy to watch betty read that damn letter#the source material is bounds more feminist than any fic ive come across#and im not even trying to find like girlboss fics--just want some angst and character exploration#starting to think fic writers just like the naive betty and not the mature one who trying to heal#post cartagena betty is actually more fun bc she talks back to daniel and marcela#idk why thats not explored more#theres only like 1 fic that sees betty as a mature woman and that writer never updated again#miss her all the time
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i dislike sacrifice characters
#like. idk what else to call them#but characters who are solely there to be horribly tortured and then die#like for example. rapunzel in the original into the woods#she was abused and isolated for years by the witch and then when finally given an escape#she's left alone with two children and eventually just goes crazy from the constant torment#and as soon as she snaps she's crushed to death.#she just gets tortured goes mad and then dies and nobody really cares except her (abusive!!!!) witch mother#and watching other media i see them pop up a lot#a character who just suffers and never gets to heal#or maybe they only suffer and the only moment they find peace is Literally on their fucking deathbed#they're just there to be beat up#watching some story analyses of different games I've wanted to get into#and the amount of characters in this one who are just horribly tortured solely to die at the end#like nobody gets a break in this story except for the actually horrible people#like wow nobody even wants to put in the FICTIONAL work to help traumatized people. i get it. cool. fun. awesome.#this is my fucking fate i guess. just a plot device to make the people around me feel bad for a bit before moving on.
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snw uhura is quickly becoming one of my favorite star trek characters EVER
#snw#uhura#i just relate to her SO hard#like i remember watching that one comet episode last year when I was. in a Bad place in terms of my job#and i swear it healed me#and the last couple episodes with her this year are also so.#just relatable#i KNOW THAT'S CRINGE TO SAY I DON'T CARE#like her admitting to mariner that she's only 22#and the amount of responsibility she has is ridiculous and she's just trying not to drown and figure everything out#and how it's so tough cause everyone around her is like 'it's you! you're smart and amazing and you got this'#and if u hear that over and over and over and over it's just. it's very sweet but also so much fucking pressure#like babygirl i know ur not real but do u understand that i'm right there with u hand in lovable hand suffering under the weight#of all these fucking Expectations#this is exactly why i gave up in high school lol#and ALSO#mariner going back in time and being like ??? she's so serious what the fuck?#and trying to teach the girl how to have fun#people recently keep coming up to me and being like lighten the FUCK up#as if it's that Easy#and like yes there's a whole team backing her up but there's also some stuff that's Solely On Her#and it's just#ahhh#i love her i want to give her a big hug and take her to an arcade and teach her that it's ok to take breaks#and do the same with myself i think#maybe i will go have that drink with andrew#if i don't DIE from this STUPID COLD
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my grandparents had to put our dog down this morning. i don't know what to do with myself
#and of course it happened when we were on holiday#there was nothing that could be done but still#it hurts#and she won't be there to greet us#i'm just so sad rn#she was 14 and had a very happy life#and my grandad was with her when they put her down#and she got to enjoy her last few days with them#and she didn’t suffer for long#I’ll miss her. She was the best dog#open for fun films or shows to watch to give my body a break for a while
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one thing about me is that if there is a Vulcan I WILL be obsessed with them. Even if I have not seen the series they are in.
#watching voyager is going to probably be suffering bcuz it seems a lot of tuvok's story lines are just him being tormented by neelix#but then again it seems like a lot of EVERYONE'S storylines in voyager seem to be tormented by neelix#i predict one of my voyager takeaways is going to be 'i want to kill neelix with hammers'#i got distracted the point of this post was supposed to be 'Vulcans Sexy'#dial p for post#edited the pronouns bcuz originally i was thinking of Spock & Tuvok from The Gay Perspective but then#i was thinking about the Vulcan arms dealer who went on a date with Quark in DS9- she was FUN i want to see her again!!
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:|
#i am not gods strongest soldier#she'll talk to someone who will say stuff like you're useless to her and take it fine but. she won't even stand to be in the same room w me#what difference is it to be being in your room playing games with the same people all the time vs. like idk.#aren't you just transferring who you're dependent on. is the difference just the level of commitment. you feel like you can leave whenever#nothing's changed really somehow. you're still doing the same things you did while back then. just that you also avoid me.#and god i don't know. i tell myself I'll care less I'll get over it it is what it is and i try so hard to be busy and not think abt it#but i can't sleep w/o watching something these days or else it's on my mind and that's been shit for my sleep quality#it's the first thing that pops up in my mind when i wake up. i get distracted in class sometimes by it. it's not like i can control it#it's just like the more you try to not think abt sth the more it comes up type of deal.#and I'm trying so hard but i think this is legitimately. gonna make me spiral and I'm trying my best to have a grip and not go there#i have things I'm looking forward to and I'm supposed to b having fun but it's hard when. There's that looming in the back of your head.#ugh ok rational choice let's go. i don't try to talk to her: we don't talk. she doesn't try to talk to me. i suffer in silence.#maybe I'll get over it find something new that feels like a safehouse but that's a big if. and idk how long i can hold on for#i try to talk to her: maybe it could go well? but maybe she'll just get more avoidant#i don't really get it it's like she can respond and laugh to stuff i say when in a group setting but she gets so guarded when it's just me#like subconsciously you know I'm not a threat you can allow yourself to have fun around me.#but you're consciously putting a guard up around me and reinforcing the negative feelings when it's just me#god. i don't. but. at least it sounds like she's happy for now so. that's all i ask for. if she doesn't want to see me i don't show up#i want to see her but. i mean. There's really no compromise or middle ground here.#they say time heals everything but it's already been so long. i don't even know why I'm still attached. she's like a different person.#the person i loved appears every now and then just never in front of me and I'm trying my best but I've never been good with loss#how do you come to terms with something being dead and alive at the same time. how do you make up the mind to drive the nail in the casket.#i can't make myself put it into the dirt when i catch a glimpse of the person i once knew. that hasn't changed for anyone else. just me.#vent#delete later
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