#fun fact he's 4 meters tall :)
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
faceeeeee · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
-NEW CHALLENGER ENTERS THE SCENE-
This lovely fellow is another one of Evelyn's creations :) and the most recent too! He is deemed as the "golden child" of her catalogue of children. He follows her every command (he's not the brightest bulb in the shed) and sees her as his mother (she hates that nickname)
53 notes · View notes
scourgeofmyownbrain · 5 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Edit: I MADE AN UPDATED ONE GO LOOK AT THAT ONE IT'S BETTER I CITED MY SOURCES AND SHOWED MY WORK AND EVERYTHING
Ladies and Gentlemen, Bitches and Bastards, Witches and Wizards, Mothers and Fuckers. Esteemed robot enjoyers, I present to you a semi-accurate height comparison of Bumblebee across the multiverse (as of July 2024). This really helps visualize the truly staggering differences between universes, at least height-wise. Also, three of these characters are Canonically the Same Guy; guess which ones.
I spent way too much time on the chart in the back it's not even funny. I will probably make more height charts for more TF characters and universes in the future. Don't expect it soon though, because when I make these, I am fueled by pure I-Got-Bored-At-Work-And-I-Have-Decided-To-Fool-Around-With-Robot-PNGs, and that fuel supply is inconsistent at best.
Hey Fun Fact, Did you know that Generation 1 Optimus Prime is around 19 Feet Tall? Bet some of you already knew that. I have no ulterior motives for bringing this fact up, what are you talking about.
My height explanations are below the cut, because you couldn't shut me up if you tried.
In an order:
Gen 1 - ~10 feet (the wiki says greater than 3 meters so I rounded up to the first whole number because round)
Netflix Cybertron Trilogy - ~10 feet (He looks identical to Gen 1 so... the reason his photo looks weird is because I couldn't find a good full body photo with him standing straight up facing the camera so I put two images together to make the worst looking photoshop job you have ever seen)
Earth Spark - 10 feet (There is no confirmed height yet but using a screen shot of him standing in front of a barn door I was able to make a reasonable guess.)
Animated - 12 feet (I have no genuine source for this, I think this info is just someone's guesstimate, but it seems reasonable. He's a tiny two door mini car, how big could he be)
New Live Action - 15 feet (The wiki hath declared. Also do we have a name for this universe because we need one I don't want to keep saying like 6 words to differentiate this one from bayverse)
Bayverse V1 - 16 feet (This is like the first 3 movies minimum, I don't remember when he hits his growth spurt. also wiki my love)
Cyberverse - 18 feet (I'm gonna be honest, the only info we have is from a really shitty screen shot of a magazine. SO if any one has a copy of this book from the video below, a high quality scan would be greatly appreciated and I will kiss the ground you walk upon. Yes I found the video where the screen shot comes from leave me alone)
Bayverse V2 - 18 feet (movie 4-5 I can't remember which one, I'm not re-looking this up. I fucking love the bayverse tho, this is the only universe with concrete and consistent this-character-is-this-height info)
Aligned Cont. WF/FOC - 20 feet (video game info screens you god send, kiss me sweetly)
Aligned Cont. TFP/RID15 - 21 feet (I do not know exactly where these numbers were found, but I fully fucking believe them. Just by looking at these characters on the show I can verify these numbers in my mind. They made specifically this universe to be full of freakishly tall robots for some fucking reason.)
And for any one who doesn't know, the three tallest are the same guy. Like the 20 feet tall one and the 21 feet tall ones, same guy. The ones in three wildly different art styles and designs. Let that sink in...
I fucking hate the aligned continuity why is that one my favorite.
332 notes · View notes
archangelgenderenvy · 3 months ago
Text
Hey, Pressure Fun Fact (because I decided to do a little math)
Sebastian Solace is approx 10.69 times taller/larger than he was before the experiments. He'd be 62' feet 4" inches/19 meters in real life (compared to his Roblox model, which is 10 feet tall for budget), and he was 5' feet 10" inches before (all provided somewhere in here).
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
It's not exact because that wouldn't be possible without MORE math/a longer decimal, which would hurt my brain to remember. But 10.69 times, that's a lot of pain.
22 notes · View notes
ynkfva · 5 months ago
Text
im gonna answer this questions as my "dr self"
Tumblr media Tumblr media
ib to @55maddox !!
1. In what reality do you live:
Yuri!!! On ice. ive never saw anyone shifting to there and its really amazing
2. What is your name:
Yelena Dmitriyevna Nikiforova. big ass name i know. fun fact: thats where my username came from
3. How other people call you? What are your nicknames, if you have any:
My russian friends and family usually call me Alyona, and my international friends call me Lena. My fans use both, but the media started calling me the "Ace of Skating" 😭🫶
4. How old are you:
Im 15 in that reality. Its SOOOO good being back at 2016. I didnt know i missed those times sm. but i miss tiktok
5. How tall are you:
1,70m or 5'8 (ig not sure tho)
6. What is your skin color:
White
7. Your body type:
Uhhh idk??? pear or hourglass
8. Your sign/birthday:
im a gemini and i was born in may 28th, in both universes
9. How do you describe yourself and your personality:
Very autistic /hj. i chose to not change my personality, but i dont judge those who do so. im usually quite and i like to read and paint. As much as im a figure skater, i hate off ice training. YAKOV LEMME GO BACK TO THE ICE ALREADY I TOLD YOU IM FINE-
10. Do you have living parents/siblings?:
I do!! Both parents and a brother who annoys the shit out of me. but i love vitya. my parents not so much. i just dont process them cuz of their money
11. What is your gender/pronouns:
Im a female and use she/her pronouns!
12. What is the color of your eyes:
Blue. very blue. like the sky. im not poetic.
13. How do your hair looks like, is it long or short?:
VEEEEERY long straight white hair (or platinum according to vitya). more than one meter of hair. it keeps beating yura on the face when we are training. dont let him know i do it on purpose
14. Do you have any scars/unique visual traits?:
I think not? i do have a mole under my left eye but i dont think thats unique
15. Do you have tattoos or piercings?:
Not yet but i want to do it!! At least a few
16. Signature scent?:
Idk? but its sweet. im terrible with scents
17. Do you have any powers/species abilities?:
Not in this universe
18. Were do you live, how does it looks like?:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I live in Saint Petersburg!! i really like the city, its a city with sm history and knowing that such great people used to live in there in the past makes my heart warm
19. Is there other people living with you right now?:
Yesss i live with my brother viktor
20. What do you do for a living?:
Im a professional figure skater. very hard but artistic job
27. Is there magic in your reality?:
No :(
22. How much money do you have?:
...a lot.
23. Who are your friends/best friends:
YURI PLISETSKY :DDD hes my everything yknow idk what i would do without him. im also friends with mila
24. Are you older or younger than them?:
Im the youngest on the ice rink 😭😭 but im only one month younger than yura so that really doesnt count
25. Do you have a crush on someone?:
No! Im aromantic :)
26. How did you meet everyone for the first time?:
Okay so theres a lot of someones in this dr. most of the people i met was because of figure skating and viktor already being famous when i started skating but lets talk about specific ppl.
I met yura when he moved to spb and started ballet classes with lilia. he was so cute and determined and i HAD to be his friend. i was doing ballet w him btw
Did you think I would meet yuuri along with yura in sochi gpf? cuz i didnt. not in person at least. i already knew yuuri from name cause im curious and i wanted to know everyone who was competing in senior and his artistic skills were REALLY good (he kinda reminds me of adam siao in this reality). you also thought i would meet yuuri in the banquet. but i didnt. well i DID saw him DRUNK DANCING WITH MY BROTHER and giving him a LAP DANCE but i was too busy filming and taking photos of it to talk to him. i only officially met him when me and yura traveled to japan
i met chris in one of vityas competitions when i was little. im like 13 years younger than viktor remember that. and i. i was jealous of chris taking my brothers attention. and i. i spat on him. yeah.
27. What are your hobbies:
Ballet, reading and painting
28. What do you like to talk about with friends:
We talk a lot about music and ice skating ofc but we talk a lot about everything tbh 😭 we dont shut up
29. What is your favorite food and drink:
(yuras) dedushkas pirozhki 🤤🤤🤤 ONE CHANCE TOLYA ONE CH- *yura's interdimensional slap*
uhhh drink? whatever i have to drink ig some soda. i dont like vodka
30. Your favorite color:
PINKKKKKK
31. Your clothing style:
i dress whatever i feel in the moment. i can dress coquette or gothic it depends
32. Your favorite place to spend time on:
Ice rink :)
33. Favorite sport, if you have one:
Ice skating duh
34. Favorite weather:
Rainy cold gray days
35. Favorite time of the day:
dawn
36. Favorite season:
Winter. but russias winter is ROUGH
37. Your biggest fear:
This is too deep to post on tumblr lol i dont even know
38. What makes you very angry?:
When im almost done w the routine and i miss a jump and YAKOV MAKE ME DO IT ALL AGAIN-
39. What makes you very happy?:
Whenever all of my friends have time to spend together
40. Do you have any pet?:
Its vityas but shes also mine. makkachin <33 good girl
41. Do you consider yourself a good fighter?:
I do! I made sure to script that i know how to fight lol
42. Is there any people you dont like?:
I would say jj but he just annoys me. OH. SARAS BROTHER. THAT GUY GIVES ME THE ICK
43. Do you have a favorite song that describes yourself, or just a favorite song in general?:
Gladiator by jann. really one of my favorite songs and it describes perfectly my dr
44. Can you play any instrument or dance?:
I can play piano and cello. i know how to dance waltz but thats it
45. Do you like to take risks and make new friends, or you are more reserved?:
Im more reserved
46. What do you do when you get very bored?
Reread crime and punishment
47. Are you a great leader?
No autism goes brrrrr
48. How is your daily routine?
wake up. hygiene. eat breakfast while watching tv. ice rink. skate. lunch w whoever is at the rink. skate. skate. skate. home. shower. read. sleep.
49. Your favorite smell
That one chocolate chris gave me in 2014
50. A big secret you have/know
yuri on ice fans might want to know what happened to viktors hair. i know.
vitya was celebrating after the banquet with some other skaters, drunk after winning gold in the olympics for the second time. he black out. he then woke up in the next afternoon, after missing his flight back home, with four other figure skater and three hockey players, all of them in the ground, wearing only underwear. his hair was a mixture of vomit, alcohol and dirt from the floor. there were even a few gum stuck to it. he was not the only one.
so he had to cut it yeah
10 notes · View notes
fanaticsnail · 5 months ago
Note
Physics anon here. To the anon taking Physics I, then you should be fine. I hope you get in! Fingers crossed! 🤞🏻🤞🏻
To the math peeps, I am choosing to be Sanji for our duel, bcs even Sanji's flaming kicks are also physics based (/j). I love you all. Your love for math scares me but I also admire you guys because I had 2 breakdowns in my high school years over math (so fun). The only math I like is the "how much percentage in a tax is there" cus that has words and normal numbers. Get algebra away from me.
To the linguistics anon, I love you, be my best friend, I love humanities, I love linguistics, I love psychology, I love sociology, I can talk about them for days! I love humanities, in fact I would argue humanities and literature are sth I ADORE.
PLS GOD LINGUISTICS ANON TELL US SOME OF DOFFY'S LINES AND THE WAY HE SPEAKS, OH AND CROCODILE, TOO, AND ALL THE LITTLE PUNS ODA MAKES.
DO WE HAVE PSYCHOLOGY ANONS HERE BECAUSE EPISODE 723 DOFFY'S LAUGHING FIT I NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT I NEED TO STUDY IT FROM A PSYCHOLOGY POV like my brain is like needy for that like the ideas are there but I cannot put them into words. It sounded like an emotional breakdown and he sounded so sad but also angry so I was not sure whether he wanted a hug or not.
Also, Snail, I do not blame you for that nsfw thought of "how fucked would you be" bcs I had the same thought but was then "oh well 😏"
Okay, so G4 Luffy's speed calc? I'll try to find my notes but if anyone wants to play around it, here are the formulas you'll need & way of solving it all, it's really pretty simple, we are using Hooke's Law of elastic force to calculate Luffy's speed. We're gonna already give the spring constant cus it's easier and it's easier to show just how MUCH force Luffy needs for such speed.
Jet Speed of a commercial plane is 252 m/s. We'll go with this being G2 speed. Okay, easy. We will need a LOT of spring constant to counteract G4 Luffy's weight which is 300kg. Like, a LOT of spring constant. That means Luffy is also using a lot of elastic energy & kinetic force. And I mean above 10 million joules. Then again, joules represent a small amount of energy. It takes 100,000 joules to heat up water in standard conditions, so it isn't that much of a stretch. (Ha, rubber pun.)
Basic thing for this...
Elastic potential energy:
Ep = 1/2 • k • x²
k = spring constant (make it 40 million)
x = compression of the spring (make it 1 meter)
No need to calculate the Ep cus that isn't what we really need, though you can if you want to make the process quicker but this is so everyone understands.
Turn that into kinetic energy:
Ek= 1/2 • m • v²
m = mass of the object, G4 Luffy's weight, 300 kg since he is 4 meters tall in G4.
Equalize them:
1/2 kx²=1/2mv²
kx²=mv²
v²= kx²/m
v= √kx²/m (under the entire square root)
I got 365 m/s. That's 1314 km/h. That exceeds commercial jet-speed.
I can go into details in another post but this is the basics of it, unless you want to start from the actual scratch which I do not recommend bcs that means you have to put more big numbers to get the k that big. Better to already decide what the k is so we can get the big force and therefore big speed. We know the force needs to be big, as Doflamingo said it himself.
"Your punches lack heaviness." aka "Put a billion Newtons in it and then you'll have a shot against me."
To put it in irl perspective, billion joules is the equivalent of about 239 kilograms (527 pounds) of TNT blowing up.
Honestly I'm thinking the force of Luffy's final punch against Doflamingo was at least 8 billion Newtons. It's... A lot, but at this point, there are no limits. It's about 1.8 billion pounds force 👍🏻
Yeah. 😄
Cheers. Don't fight in Snail's inbox, you all from all fields are amazing ❤️
Tumblr media
Physics anon. Physics anon. Oh my gosh, I am simply blown away by this calculation. Oh my gosh, the work you've done. I can't wait til chef-husband comes home to share with him this amazing calculation, you have no idea. He's gonna go:
Tumblr media
The anon love for one another in my ask box lately is absolutely superb. I love the friendly fire and witty retorts you've all got. Always respect and humour, and I love you all.
The calculations of the hands Doffy caught from our short king of the pirates has me rolling. I'm legit howling.
Tumblr media
Keep your equations coming, I love them. Learning through the power of sums and passions of the anons. Superb work 🥰🖤
8 notes · View notes
ikuspace · 11 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
The Tiger
Hey there, fellow explorer! Welcome to Oslo, and you're in for a treat because I'm about to introduce you to one of our city's most beloved landmarks - the Tiger statue right outside Oslo Central Station. Trust me, you can't miss it!
This magnificent bronze beast has been guarding our main railway station since 1994, and it's become quite the celebrity. Standing proud at 4.5 meters tall, our tiger is a sight to behold. There's a whole story behind why we've got a tiger in a city that's, well, not exactly known for its wild feline characters!
The Tiger City: Oslo's Quirky Nickname
Well, it all goes back to a nickname our city picked up in the 1870s. Back then, a popular poet named Bjørnstjerne Bjørnson referred to Oslo (then called Christiania) as "Tigerstaden" or "The Tiger City." It wasn't a compliment, though - he was criticizing the city for being a cold, dangerous place.
But you know what? We Oslovians have a great sense of humor. Instead of getting offended, we embraced the nickname! Over time, "Tigerstaden" became a term of endearment, symbolizing Oslo's spirit - confident, proud, and a bit wild at heart.
The Tiger Statue: A Modern Icon
Fast forward to 1994, and our city decided to make this nickname concrete (or bronze, in this case). The tiger statue, created by Elena Engelsen, was placed right in front of the central station. It's become the perfect meeting spot and a fantastic photo stop for tourists and locals alike.
Fun Facts About Our Feline Friend
The tiger weighs a whopping 4.5 tons - that's like 4-5 cars!
It's hollow inside, which is why you might hear it "roar" on windy days as the air whistles through it.
Local kids love to climb on it (though we don't officially encourage this for safety reasons).
During holidays, you might spot the tiger wearing a scarf or a hat - we Oslovians love dressing it up!
Your Gateway to Oslo Adventures
Now, here's a pro tip from your friendly local: the tiger is more than just a cool statue. It's the perfect starting point for your Oslo adventure! From here, you can:
Hop on a guided tour of the city - many start right here.
Take a short walk to Karl Johans gate, our main shopping street.
Head to the nearby Opera House for some stunning architecture.
Explore the vibrant Grünerløkka neighborhood, just a tram ride away.
So, whether you're here for sightseeing, shopping, or just soaking in the Oslo vibe, make sure to say hi to our tiger. It's not just a statue - it's a symbol of Oslo's spirit, and now you're part of its story too! Enjoy your time in our Tiger City!
1 note · View note
dragoninahumancostume · 6 months ago
Text
I just measured Malefor on a picture from the show where Spyro is in front of him and since he's 14 Spyros counting Malefor's horns and apparently Spyro is like 130-140, then Malefor is about 18.2 - 19.6 meters tall (in four legs, counting the horns) and 16.9 - 18.2 if you take out the horns that are about 1.4 meters
So yeah. Just a random fun fact :3
(I was also not happy with the sources that said Malefor was about 10-15 feet tall because that sounds tall to me who uses meters but it's really just about 3-4 meters. My guy fits in my room if he lowers his head a bit. Spyro was shown to fit in his hand, so he's definitely at least 10m if you yk take average human anatomy to have a reference and say Spyro is 1.4 and Malefor's hand is 1.4 in length or so and his head must be around that too and so you go 1.4 * 8 bc a human is usually said to be 8 heads so 11.2 or so at least. But then again those are probably based of the Spyro games and I'm doing this based of the show)
3 notes · View notes
sirius-nightstream · 2 years ago
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Fuck it, lets get weird today
Eggman’s toes~ lets talk about it
1st: Tokyo Olympics 2nd: Sonic Forces 3rd: Shadow the Hedgehog 4th: Tokyo Olympics
(I should preface this by giving credit to all those who ripped these models and made them available on models resource and other places)
-1st and 4th show us that Eggman and Nega’s bare feet are actually a size 20.5 -2nd shows that their boots are a size 25 however -3rd uses Gerald as a secondary reference. Assuming he’s the same height as Eggman, he’s also a size 20.5. But Unlike Eggman, Gerald’s slippers are a perfect fit -Gerald also just has wider feet while Eggman’s are more slim -All Models measure Eggman/Nega/Gerald at their respective height in meters. So 1.85m
I mean, i guess this checks out. Eggman and Nega’s feet don’t take up all the space in the boots surely. Could also be a modeling error but considering Sonic X shows Eggman’s boots being more rounded at his toes instead of pointy, one could assume they are the full 25.
also Gerald really said:
Tumblr media
OH and while im still going, i may as well share the other weird shit i found
Tumblr media
Big is a size 36.5. Double confirmation by measuring the heroes model as well. Meanwhile, as of TSR, they’ve been shrunk to a size 32.
Keep in mind that Sonic is only a meter tall. 
That’s 39 inches, 
or 3′3, 
or half of Big’s height
Tumblr media
Fun Fact: Big is actually 6′6 when you count his ears
Tumblr media
This is what I meant earlier. Sonic is only barely taller than BIg’s feet alone. If sonic were laying down or something and big was strolling by, Big can literally STEP on sonic and not even see him.
I love comically profound proportions lol
Tumblr media
Sonic, or at least the Werehog, is a size 17
Tumblr media
Vector is a size 28 at 5′11 and strangely enough...
Tumblr media
Storm, who is 4′7, is a size 25.5? Tbh, this makes sense. With big arms like he has, not having big feet to compensate means that he’d be in a permanent state of imbalance.
Anyways, this has been a moment of sheer fuckery brought to you by me~
14 notes · View notes
hacked-by-jake · 3 years ago
Note
List 1:
4, 8, 13
Richy and Dan
Genre: something funny 😆
Viva Las Vegas
Summary: Thomas and Hannah get married for the second time. And two of the group somehow take the whole Las Vegas concept too seriously.
Pairing: Dan & Richy, GN!MC Genre: Humor // crack fic Prompts: "Let's kiss and see where it takes us." // "How do you become accidently married?" // "This is stupid. And kind of fun." Words: 3122 Warnings: Mention of too much alcohol, taking unconscious drugs, swearing, Injuries, mention of brawl. A/N: Okay, this is something I might call crack-fic, it’s really just for entertainment, and it’s maybe a little over-the-top. Please don’t take it so seriously. Of course, this story makes use of typical Las Vegas movie clichés. Dear Anon, I hope it’s okay that I put MC in. But if I didn’t, the story would have been much longer. I hope you will enjoy it and have fun. Thank you for sending a request! As always, please excuse mistakes etc.💚🌹🎭
Tumblr media
"Hey, Dan! I was looking for you" a few meters from Dan, who was standing at the bar and had just ordered a new round of whiskey, suddenly Richy’s head popped up between the people.
Dan cheered loudly to his friend when he saw him and raised his glass, "Richy rich, my old friend! We haven’t seen each other in a long time. Come over here and let me take you in my arms!"
The young mechanic had absolutely nothing against the idea of Dan, which is why he made his way through the crowd waiting for drinks with fast steps and without any regard everyone who stood in his immediate vicinity pushed to the side.
Insults came from all directions, people spilled their drink and were pushed close together thanks to the mechanic, but Richy didn’t care at all and his attention was only on his long-time friend.
When he nearly reached the bearded one, both of them spread their arms wide, ready to take each other into a hug. But Richy didn’t even think about taking Dan only in his arms.
He took a run-up, jumped off as well as possible from the sand floor of the "beach bar" in his drunken state and jumped less elegantly on the bearded man’s arm by wrapping his arms around Dan’s neck and his legs around his belly.
However, since Dan hadn’t seen this coming, Richy’s arm hit his arm so hard that the glass of whiskey Dan had protected like a baby flew into the air. But that didn’t matter to them either, and they didn’t really notice that they had apparently hitted someone with the glas.
Dan just laughed loudly while holding Richy close to himself. This one looked down in Dan’s eyes laughing from above, until the idea of the evening came to him, "Hey husband" he said, "Let’s kiss and see where it takes us!"
The mechanic already wanted to lean down to Dan, but it couldn’t get as far as a deep and really angry voice interrupted the two.
"Was that your fucking glass, asshole?"
Surprised, the long-haired one with Richy on his arm turns in the direction where the voice came from. "Huh?" he exclaimed as a sign that he had either not understood correctly, or simply found it ridiculous.
For the tall and muscular man, however, this all seemed quite important. He threw the glass in the sand in front of Dan’s feet and came a few steps closer. "If you threw me with your fucking glass, I asked!" the man repeated angrily.
A small circle had already formed around the two and now Dan’s drunken head seemed to realize that this was absolutely no joke and he urgently needed to reassure this situation.
However, the calming did not fit so well with the bearded one, who therefore did not work for an improvement, but for the fact that his slightly scratched ego stood in a good light, and proved to all that he didn't let that happen to himself.
"What if it were?" he asked with provocative tone back.
However, his opponent’s first glance went a little irritated to the one still clinging to Dan, Richy, who looked at the man with big eyes.
Dan understood immediately and dropped his friend on the floor, who immediately sought protection behind his stronger entourage. "Dan" he whispered, "Let's get outta here"
But Dan didn’t even think about it, instead he straightened up, straightened his shoulders and put on an evil look on his face. The slight sway, due to the whiskey and the drugs that he still had, he himself did not notice.
Now with more courage and self-confidence, he asked his opponent, "Don’t you know who I am?"
A amused laugh broke out from the man, "No? Why? Should I?"
Dan also noticed now that this was not a really wise statement, because even though the case around Hannah has become a little famous, it was nothing that everyone had noticed.
But he couldn’t lose face and decided to just keep playing, "I’m the one who put down Crowman! The idiot seriously thought I was actually in a wheelchair because of him, but that was a lie!" Dan nodded victoriously and over his shoulder Richy shouted in support, "Yeah! He beated Crowman! You better start running, you ruffian!"
"Ha Ha Ha! Exactly you- wait what the hell?" Dan turned his head back and looked without understanding to the cap wearing. Then he shook his head quickly, "Shut up," he hissed, "You’re making a fool of us!"
Richy understood and nodded in agreement, then he slapped Dan on the shoulders to give him courage and stepped back a few steps "For Duskwood!" he still shouted and raised his fist in the air.
Dan turned to the front again, but unfortunately it seemed to have been too much of a good thing for the man. Because before Dan could react, the man hit his shoulder so hard, actually only to get the attention of the bearded one again, that he, also thanks the alcohol, fell back and almost tore the mechanic with himself to the ground.
The large amount of alcohol, drugs, and adrenaline in Dan’s body, in accord with the fall, brought his circulation to the ground just like he himself had gone to the ground, and the last thing he heard before falling into unconsciousness was the voice, no, not the voice of God as he had first thought, but MC's voice, who worried called his name.
Then everything went peacefully dark.
-.-.-.-
As Dan slowly awoke from a dreamless sleep a few long hours later, his head boomed as if someone was working with a jackhammer on his forehead. The loud voice, which he was able to quickly assign to MC, did not exactly improve his headache, but he was definitely not ready to draw attention to himself yet.
His memories of last night seemed to be blurry, but that he once again lay in a hospital did not surprise him at all. At least his head hurt so much that it didn’t surprise him.
"We want to get married again, they said! In Las Vega, they said! THAT WILL BE FUNNY, THEY SAID!" enraged, MC ran up and down the room waving wildly with their hands in the air while they seemed to call with someone.
"Yes, thank you, I’ll see you later, I hope that dumb and dumber will wake up soon!" they hissed.
This seemed to be his cue to lift his left arm, as the right was in a sling to his astonishment, and to make himself felt with the words, "Dumb is awake."
MC’s gaze immediately raided at him and with the angry look he received, he would have liked to have twisted his eyes, but the headaches prevented him from doing so.
"Oh, look, dumber just woke up!" MC said to the person they was talking to on the phone and then said goodbye quickly.
"Well? Does the head hurt?" MC asked teasingly.
Dan growled in a bad mood as he grabbed the remote control of the bed and slowly raised the headboard.
Meanwhile, MC filled two glasses of water to give one to the bearded and the other to place on the small table next to Richy’s bed.
When Dan seemed to like the position of his bed, he stopped with the remote control and then pulled out the pillow under his head.
Before MC could ask him what he was doing, however, he had thrown the pillow at Richy and hit his face so perfectly that he was awake on the spot.
"Good morning, princess," Dan scoffed, leaning against the backrest.
"Shit, my head, what happened? Dan you idiot," Richy immediately yelled and pulled the blanket over his head to escape the brightness of the room.
Without comment, only with a sigh MC left the room to get a nurse and thus also both a pain reliever for the headaches.
-.-.-.-
In the meantime both men had survived the worst phase after waking up, had some food in their stomach and also the doctor had given the all-clear. He confirmed that, if the new blood sample before eating and before the medication, end with positive results, the two could go back to the hotel where the group stayed for Hannah and Thomas’s second wedding.
He had also informed Dan about his shoulder injury, which was dislocated by the punch and his impact on the ground.
The strong pain, coupled with the poisons of the subtances he had taken a few hours earlier, had then led to the bearded man losing consciousness. The doctor did not mention exactly which substances were involved, except alcohol.
This was thanks to MC, who had used all means to ensure that this remained an absolute secret in order to avoid the two of them a possible police report. With little money that had to be offered to the doctor, the topic was fortunately off the table. However, MC wouldn’t miss telling them about it. Finally, they owed them the bribe for the doctor now.
After he had finally left the room and the two could have breakfast, MC had both gone through with a devastating look punished and this had also shown effect.
Because even though both men didn’t really know what exactly happened anymore, it was obviously that it didn’t go so well.
But in order to keep the two in suspense, MC had waited until after eating to confront them.
"So where do we start? What do you still know?"
Richy and Dan cautiously turned to each other to see if the other could remember anything, but both could only shrug.
"The last thing I know is that we left the club where we went to celebrate the wedding with Hannah and Thomas and then everything is gone" Richy explained.
MC, who had sat on a chair between the two hospital beds, nodded slowly and crossed their arms in front of their chest.
"Then different: How do you become accidentally married?"
"WHAT?" it broke out of both men disturbed and synchronously they sat upright in bed.
MC shrugged their shoulders, "Well, thanks to Jake, who, after your sudden disappearance, followed your way through security cameras to find you after none of you picked up his cell phone, we found out that you got married by Elvis Presley in a fake church." While MC reported, they pulled a laptop out of the backpack hanging on their chair.
"Congratulations Mr. and Mr. Anderson or Mr. and Mr. Rogers, a divorce is incredibly expensive."
The laptop was opened and the Play Button was pressed with a quick handle. The video of a security camera in the church was shown.
-4 hours before-
"Dear Daniel Anderson, would you like to take Richard Rogers as your-" the cheap-looking Elvis Presley lowered his voice so that it was only a slight murmur, and incomprehensible to the two drunken men: "rightful," after that the man continued in normal voice: "husband? Will love him and such a stuff and always be at his side?"
"YES!" he shouted loudly and hit the mechanic against his upper arm. "Ouch" he hissed in indignation and held the sore spot. Dan, however, only laughed loudly while in the background a lot of strangers began to cheer, who either just got married before Dan and Richy, or were on their way to get married.
"And do you, Richard Rogers-" Dan rudely interrupted the man, "Yes, we know what you want to say, go faster!"
Elvis sighed annoyed: "Rogers, do you want to take Anderson to be your husband too?"
The mentioned nodded convincingly and smiled with sparkling eyes at his buddy. Dan then pulled the eyebrows together disgusted, "Don’t overdo it, understand? This is just a friendship thing! You know, bros before hoes."
However, Elvis had little desire to drag the whole thing out, which is why he reached into his pocket and after he announced "Then you are now: husband and husband!" threw up some flower blossoms above their heads which were to serve as confetti.
Fraternally, the two hugged each other while the people in the background cheered loudly again.
"I love you, man!" Richy shouted joyfully and much too exaggerated, kissing Dan on the cheek. "Oh shut up!" Dan hissed.
-.-.-.-
"Oh, and here’s your wedding certificate" MC pulled a piece of paper out of their jacket pocket and stood up to shake hands with the two, more than just shocked men, and give Dan the folded piece of paper.
"We’re not really married now, though, are we?" Richy’s voice sounded dry and he cleared his throat.
"Elvis, after our call to the police, was arrested for theft in several cases. So no, you two aren’t really married, of course not. Your watch, Richy, is with the police, by the way. Elvis hasn’t had time to sell it yet."
If this was possible at all, Richy’s eyes became even bigger now, "This is an heirloom! This lousy-"
"Wait. You really want to tell us that we were so drunk that we got married by a wannabe Elvis Presley and didn’t know about it anymore?" Dan snorted.
All MC could do was nod: "You just saw, but you weren’t just drunk. The word 'strip club' rings one of you?"
At the same time both men shook their heads again.
"Well, the gummy bears you ate there weren’t regular gummy bears, at least the recipe was a little different. Do you want to watch the surveillance video or should I briefly explain what happened?"
"Short version please" immediately shoots it out of Richy.
"Well, then you miss the best one though. After I kissed Jessy out of friendship, you two got annoyed, and drunk you went to another club. The first you found was a strip club, so you went in there together to keep drinking. That worked, too, and you sat down in a quieter corner and fought most of the time. Probably about Jessy, who, by the way, is incredibly mad at both of you, so have fun when you get back to the hotel. Anyway, there was a bowl of gummy bears on the table. The more you had eaten, the better you understood each other. Your blood results from last night have revealed a high value of LSD, this was, as you may think, in the gummy bears. I paid the doctor money so that we simply did not pay attention to this little detail in his report. You owe me the money now. At some point you came up with the idea that Richy could dance better than the people working there and shortly afterwards you were kicked out of the club by the security staff. Either because the stage is not meant for visitors, or because Richy can’t dance as well as the actual dancers."
With every word MC spoke, Richy’s face continued to warp until it looked painfully distorted. Even though the pain was probably more mental and the more he heard about it, it was getting worse and worse.
However, MC did not give them a break to process the events but immediately continued the course of the last hours.
"Well, after you had to leave the strip club, you set off to find the next bar. This time in a really good mood, with LSD and alcohol in the head. Unfortunately, we could not follow you on the cameras, but only found you shortly before the church. So how you managed to decide in this short time that you want to get married will forever remain a secret if none of you will remember it again. The fact is, LSD was probably partly to blame. And after your big wedding you found such a beach bar similar club where you really celebrated together. After all, it was also a big occasion, right? You Dan, lost around 60 dollar to the slot machines in the club. You two still owe the bar 30 dollar of drinks you have bought for yourself and everyone else around you. After the guy knocked you out, we didn’t have time to pay. So you have to do this before you get a report. The owner was as patient with you as Phil always is and gave you time to live again. Since we were able to follow you luckily, we came to the bar to pick you up, but then Dan has messed with the guy, this you can also still report, if you want. After Dan then passed out, of course, we called an ambulance, which then detected your dislocated shoulder and gave you a medication to keep you asleep until your shoulder is back in place. Before that, blood was taken from you and because they were worried that you could faint again by yourself through all the stuff in your body and the pain, they saw it as a better idea to let you asleep intending. Richy was still awake at the beginning, but he fell asleep a few times on the way to the hospital. After they found alcohol and drugs in Dan’s blood, they also took your blood and gave you a bed to keep an eye on you for the night. After the two of you were in the room, the others left and I stayed here to tell you all about it. The others are just as planned together in the restaurant right now. And with this, we are at the end of your most horrible night, which was probably your best at the same time."
The first moments it was absolutely quiet in the hospital room. Neither one of them moved, not even blinking.
Dan was the first to clear his throat loudly and then shake his head, "We don’t tell anyone, understand? No one outside the group! Never!"
Richy was now red like a tomato and his eyes glittered as if he had to start crying right away: "I took LSD?" he croaked, "Drugs?"
MC nodded cautiously for confirmation.
"Oh God" the mechanic gasped and then fell backwards onto the bed. He buried his face in his hands and shook his head: "This can’t be true."
"Well, unfortunately it is, and no one will ever know about the drugs, Richy, it’s not that bad. I’m just glad you’re okay and you didn’t do any more stupid things." MC tried to comfort him.
"Oh man! This is stupid!" Dan complained.
"Yeah, that’s it, that’s right, well, and kind of fun" replied MC. "At least for the rest of us. Well, what is it called? What happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas."
Tumblr media
Masterlist
21 notes · View notes
cheesyficwriter · 3 years ago
Text
Happy Saturday! Hope you enjoy some Dean/Seamus fluff mixed with some adventure! It was fun to write for this pairing. Written for IWSC Round 4.
Summary: Confused about his feelings for his best mate, Seamus agrees to go on a thrilling Muggle adventure despite some hesitation. Will he take the plunge?
Tumblr media
The First Move
Rushing water splashes against a cluster of rocks, drowning out the pounding in Seamus’s ears.
No. No. No.
All of the air exits his lungs as he steps closer to the ledge. Car after car zips by on the roadway behind him, and he reckons those Muggle passengers have the right idea. The purpose of this bridge is to provide passage over the water, not into it.
Instead, he spent the morning filling out a liability waiver, emptying his pockets of any loose galleons, and stepping into a safety harness that tugs in all the wrong places.
All because of Dean Thomas.
Dean, his brave and open-minded best mate, can convince Seamus to partake in the most mental activities without question. His eagerness to say ‘yes’ has nothing to do with Dean’s striking brown eyes, the tall, slender column of his neck, or the fact that his skin always seems so soft to touch—
No, absolutely bloody not.
Sure, they’ve completed class projects at the same double desk, attended the Quidditch World Cup, and even fought side by side during the Battle of Hogwarts. Dean has been with him through almost everything, and there’s no scenario in which Seamus would bungee jump with anyone else.
“Cheers, mate!” Dean appears beside him, and Seamus yelps as the platform shakes from the increased weight. “I'm not going to push us over the edge!"
The bridge is long, narrow, and creaks along with the slightest movement, not as sturdy as Seamus had hoped given how it’s the only structure holding him 100 meters above the water. Its only redeeming quality is being anchored to the ground—at least, Seamus hopes it is. He knows it's illogical, but how is this platform staying upright without magic? Surely, all this metal isn’t enough to suspend everything over the shallow river without the help of a sticking charm?
This is potentially the worst plan he’s ever agreed to, and there’s already a long list.
Although known for his reckless streak—and an affinity for pyrotechnics—he makes a choice that fills him with nothing but regret.
He looks down.
Seamus’s legs wobble and he grips the railing behind him even tighter until his knuckles turn white. A million thoughts race through his overactive mind as he struggles to swallow down a large gulp of saliva pooling in his mouth.
It’s decided. He won’t ever jump off this platform even if a wizard holds a wand to his head.
“Don't worry,” Dean shouts near his ear. “It’s practically safe!”
“Practically safe?” Seamus’s palms begin to sweat, and he hooks an elbow around the railing to stop himself from slipping. “How can it be practically safe? It either is or it’s not.”
And people do this for sport?
A crewman interrupts his protests by yanking on Seamus’s harness without warning to make a few small adjustments.
"You mean it wasn't a proper fit before?" Seamus squeaks. He spits out wisps of the man’s shaggy black hair that fall by Seamus’s mouth while he works, making his thoughts drift to Harry Potter—wait, it’s not him, is it? Potter would certainly push him off the edge just to be a prat.
But as the crewman gives him a short nod before moving on to Dean, Seamus’s gaze travels to the thin, charcoal-colored cord attached to his feet.
His life depends on a strap with the consistency of a rubber band.
Seamus’s stomach sinks as his eyes make contact with the choppy waves rolling through the water below. It’s the clearest aqua he’s ever seen, showcasing the pebbled rocks resting beneath the transparent liquid surface. Blimey, is there even enough water to dive into if their escapade goes south? Although Seamus has gone through various mishaps over the years, he doesn’t fancy bungee jumping being another one.
He imagines the small stretch of river hissing at him with the venomous strength of Nagini. A shiver slithers its way through his body as a blast of cold air hits his already burning face.
“Alright, Seamus?”
"I need a minute." Seamus climbs over the railing, heaving out a large sigh as his feet plant on the solid sidewalk. He closes his eyes and tries to remind himself to inhale and exhale through his nose.
A hand drops onto his shoulder and Dean’s deep voice tickles his ear. “Where’s your Gryffindor bravery?”
“I left it at the castle,” Seamus mumbles under his breath, still refusing to open his eyes. “All I can think about is us ricocheting off that water like a couple of bewitched bludgers.”
"You are rather clumsy," Dean teases.
Seamus’s head snaps to the side, and he fixes Dean with the same intimidating stare he practices in the mirror, right down to the scrunched eyebrows and pursed lips. "You cheeky git!"
Raucous laughter fills the air, and the sound eases a small amount of the tension in Seamus’s shoulders. He likes Dean’s laugh, even when he’s using the pleasant conversation to quell Seamus’s nerves.
“Just pretend you’re soaring on your broom…er, downwards.”
Seamus scoffs. That’s easy for Dean to say, speaking to the skills he developed as Chaser for the Gryffindor team—not that Seamus is bitter at all.
“Why couldn’t you have taken me to one of those Muggle football games you love so much?”
Dean tuts. “I go to those all the time. This is loads better.”
Seamus bites his lip, glancing behind him at the crewman observing the pair with raised eyebrows and crossed arms. The man checks the watch on his wrist. “We do have another couple coming after you two.”
“Oh, no, we’re not a—” Seamus fumbles over his words while the heat creeps up the back of his neck. He avoids Dean’s gaze as he attempts to convince himself to get back on the platform.
The bridge is massive. Seamus’s mouth goes dry as he retraces his movement to the ledge, not once letting go of the steel railing remaining as his only sense of stability. He’d rather not splatter against the ground like a Blast-Ended Skrewt.
The worker bends down and wraps a thicker cord around both sets of ankles lined next to each other on the platform. “Remember, you will be jumping in tandem. We’ve measured the amount of cord that will be let out during your jump based on your combined weight we calculated earlier today.”
Seamus’s head pivots in Dean’s direction. “You didn’t tell me that!”
“This was explained to us during the training, Shay. Were you even listening?” Dean asks with an exaggerated eye roll.
“Turn towards each other,” the crewman instructs.
The speed of Seamus’s heart picks up, his mind already shifting to the thought of being wrapped around his mate, pressed chest to chest, hands trailing over every ridge of Dean’s taut muscles—
But what if the cord snaps? The pit in his stomach grows larger as he considers Dean’s life being at risk, too. Here’s to hoping the cord works its magic to protect them from harm.
"Keep your wand handy." Dean pats the inside zipper pocket of his jacket, breaking Seamus out of his daydream. "I’ll levitate us back up if needed.”
“We can’t do that!" Seamus hisses, darting his eyes around to make sure the crewman isn’t listening. "We’re in the presence of—”
“Muggles. I know," Dean replies under his breath. "It was a joke.”
Seamus wipes a bead of sweat from his forehead, blinking up at the beaming ray of sun above their heads. Why is it so blasted hot outside today?
“I can’t wait to draw us making the freefall.” A wide grin splits onto Dean’s face. "The look on your face alone…”
“Oh, bugger off.”
“You know I’m good with a quill.”
Seamus almost falls over, a warmth spreading through his core. “Is that an innuendo?”
“If you want it to be.” Dean finishes his quip with a wink, sending a bout of Flobberworms through Seamus's belly.
Well, what the bloody hell does that mean?
He doesn’t have much time to dissect those puzzling words any further. It's clear Seamus has two choices: he could not jump and potentially miss out on a great adventure with the bravest bloke he knows, or he could go for it and take the leap. Dean says he's wanting to tick this experience off his bucket list, but this adventure definitely wasn't on Seamus's. Is Dean’s desire enough to fuel his own?
It's too late now, Seamus figures while standing up straighter. He's committed to this mission. Although he doesn't trust himself to make the jump, he believes in Dean.
There’s no other choice to make.
“Are you ready?” Dean asks, nodding his head towards the crewman standing with his hands on his hips. “I reckon he’ll kick us out if we don’t go soon.”
The notion makes Seamus chuckle, considering the internal battle he just went through in his head. "Do I really have a choice?"
"You do have a choice." Dean reaches out and gives his hand a tight, comforting squeeze. "You always have a choice."
"Not when it comes to you."
Dean’s bronze eyes grow cloudy, and he tilts his head, never once letting his heated gaze stray. He hitches in a strangled breath as Seamus shifts against him, allowing their fingertips to brush together at their sides. Sparks shoot up Seamus’s arm as if someone’s cast Verdimillious.
It’s official. Seamus is ready to throw himself off this bridge, and he’ll do it with Dean head-on.
The crewman lifts up a closed fist, giving the pair a signal to go.
"Forget the fear,” Dean’s hot breath whispers near his ear. “Just jump."
Seamus recites the instructions drilled into his mind. Bend your knees. Stretch your arms out.
Without taking another second to think about his decision, Seamus allows gravity to take command and dives headfirst, plummeting off the landmark with Dean into a freefall. His mind goes blank, unable to focus on anything beyond the wind rushing through his ears. A turbulent commotion stirs through his belly, and Seamus clenches his eyes shut to brace himself for the inevitable impact.
His entire body springs up into the air through a series of bounces when the cord reaches its maximum stretch. The tug back isn’t nearly as painful as Seamus had anticipated. Did they complete the jump in under five seconds?
Dean lets out a loud “whoop!” that echoes through the open air. "It's just like flying!"
"Yeah, to our death!" Seamus yells, still intent on keeping his eyes closed as they swing back and forth like a pendulum.
"We didn’t cock this up, yeah?" Dean chuckles.
Seamus allows his eyelids to flutter open, regaining control of his surroundings. Crisp salt air fills his nostrils, bringing awareness to his head dangling mere centimeters above the water level. The entire world rotates on its axis as they continue to spin, and too much blood is rushing to his head to think properly.
"I think I was screaming all the way down! It’s a bit blurry, I’ll say."
"I know." Dean’s voice is close, so close, and Seamus can taste the coffee on his breath from the caffeine break they had shortly before they made the jump.
A rush of adrenaline seeps through Seamus’s veins, and propels him to commit to an act he’s never had the courage to do before. He really should have bought a box of Toothflossing Stringmints on his last trip to Hogsmeade.
Ah, well.
Garnering every ounce of willpower, Seamus cranes his neck forward and crushes his mouth against Dean’s. To his pleasure, Dean responds in an instant, his large, calloused hands threading through Seamus’s hair and massaging his scalp. He can taste the sweat on Dean’s upper lip as he pulls it between his teeth, eliciting a loud moan from both of them.
A sensation washes over him, one Seamus can only describe as massive euphoria. Every single cell in his brain is firing, making him giggle like a lunatic as he pulls back a few centimeters. He just kissed Dean…Dean! Correction, he just snogged Dean. Upside down.
Judging by the toothy grin on Dean’s face, he quite enjoyed the moment too. Seamus doesn’t ever want to let go, even if someone utters Relashio.
All too soon a bright yellow rubber raft drifts towards them through the water, and a man instructs the pair to grab the pole lifted in their direction so the crew can untie their legs. Once back on the solid Earth, Seamus’s hand finds Dean’s straight away.
“That was a nasty shock!” Seamus seizes his last bit of mad energy, bouncing up and down on his toes. Although his legs are so numb he can barely stand straight on his feet, it’s like he’s conquered a Hungarian Horntail. It’s comical how the thought of leaping to an unknown fate was far more terrifying than actually taking the plunge.
"It was brilliant!" Dean gasps all in one breath. "You are brilliant.” He reaches out his free hand and ruffles Seamus’s untidy sandy-colored hair.
He never thought he’d be a land diver, nor did he believe he’d end the moment snogging Dean, but here he is, proving his courage.
Now he can remind Dean for the rest of their lives that he made the first move.
Seamus squints his eyes up towards the grand, arching bridge while puffing out his chest with newfound confidence.
"Can we try it from the top of the Astronomy Tower next?"
28 notes · View notes
knullanon · 3 years ago
Note
Ah, I see you write for the DC universe. I actually wanna request some headcanon’s with an any gender reader. Have you read the 1985’s Crisis On Infinite Earth’s? Oh I have a bad habit of beating around the bush, ya see cause I’m shy n stuff.
Oh jeez, I’m here to request yandere headcanon’s for the Anti-Monitor. I just gotta know what his deal is with consuming realities and all.
heheheh so I saw a video on him and uhhh this is what its gonna be but yes i love this mf and his stupid brothers
also im making perpetua exist just cuz i can, and i am sorry if i fuck up anything that's not true bc this shit is complicated
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
he doesn't remember how he found you all he knows is that he was pretty much like "why is there a kid out here"
he didn't know what to do for like the first 4 months so he just kinda sat on his home planet thinking "what the fuck"
when he's eating worlds n shit he just leaves you be, bc 1, outside you will probably die, 2, for the most part you get really anything you need.
also, lets assume he just took you from a positive-matter universe and just kinda ignored that fact and just placed you with his brothers. which they wouldn't know what to do either btw.
truly does not give a fuck about what you think on matters like "can I go visit so and so"
hes a literal god who eats universes like what???? who is so and so and why aren't they dead?
you nicknamed him anti-virus software for fun and he took it way too seriously, either getting all angry about it or taking it in pride and there's no in between on how he acts when you call him that (yes this was supported by that one youtube comment im making it real)
also, get ready for loneliness. there is going to be no one there for you. except for those thunder knights he has.
monitor would appear and be like "yo why is there a kid in your house" and he would just kinda tower over you all, "they're my kid"
also, since he's normally like 900 meters tall he sometimes just makes himself 12 feet tall so he can talk to you but also still be tall as hell.
sometimes offers you a taste of a universe while you just sit there like (ㆆ_ㆆ)
honestly tho, probably just turns you immortal and then uses the anti life equation to his favor. maybe he might even turn you into a warrior. maybe.
really a bitch about meeting the rest of those mfs. monitor would be the uncle whos really nice but gets shit talked behind his back, world forager is the guy who somehow gets past the walls to meet you, and anti-monitor doesn't wanna argue with perpetua bc c'mon. dude.
on a real note however, it does get extremely lonely whenever you're left by yourself, which is why its always fun when he grants you immortality or another godlike power, then asking one of your uncle or perpetua to send you to a positive matter universe and then fuck around there.
anti monitor seeing you hang with the teen titans in a different universe for the fifth time in a row:
Tumblr media
yeah that's all I got
27 notes · View notes
sisterofleatherfrog · 3 years ago
Text
Star Wars Kinktober day- 3
Prompt: Under-clothes bondage 
Fives x Sub! OC (AFAB)
Orla is another one of my OC’s that I sometimes play around with in my fandom daydreams. She’s very tall (think around 6’10), and her appearance is non-human (I’ll definitely have to elaborate on that in art form later), and she is Five’s big-titty goth gf. She has some self-confidence/worth issues, but Fives is literally so goddamn smitten. 
Some art as a sorry for missing day 4!
Tags: Bondage, collar, bf chooses gf’s clothes and dresses her, pre negotiated kink, safewords, cunnilingus, dirty talk, daddy kink
Words: 2440
🖤💜🖤
“Fives? Do- do you, could you help me?” Orla asked, a tremble present in her voice. They’d planned this outing the previous week, going out to a beer garden to have lunch and meet with a few of Five’s brothers and their significant others. She’d made friends with a few of the troopers and their partners and was definitely looking forward to having a few drinks with them. That wasn’t all though, after confirming the date and time Orla had got to thinking. They’d been playing around with a lot of things recently in the bedroom; the collection of ropes, binders, among other things in their special little place was a testament to that. They had yet to try and bring it out of the bedroom, but it had been teasing Orla’s mind all week, and maybe…
Footsteps came up to the ajar bedroom door and it swung as it opened, her lover’s head peaked in. “What’s the matter Meshla? The dress zipper stu-” Fives abruptly stopped as he saw her, kneeling nude in the middle of the bedroom with a several meter length of red rope before her. The door lightly knocked the wall as he came fully into the room and looked down at her from a few paces with no little interest in his eyes. “What’s all this then,?”
He didn’t sound like he was upset in any way and Orla felt confident in explaining: “Well, remember us speaking of trying more adventurous things?” Fives nodded, eyes shining with that impish edge she knew so well as they roved her lush body. She bit her lip, “I must confess I’ve been thinking more on it since these plans were made, and maybe… Could you tie me up, daddy? I want to be your good little slut wherever we go together.” She lowered her head, but still her eyes stayed on Fives where he looked down on her. 
For a moment he was quiet, seemingly stunned as everything, her nudity, the use of THAT word, and the begging all came together to short-circuit his mind. Before she could start to regret her decision though, he drew in a shaky breath and drew a hand down his face until the wide grin on his face was revealed to her. He shifted his weight, the movement catching her eye and bringing it down to his crotch where he was beginning to stir. “Shit meshla,” he breathed. “Do you mean it? Do you really want to do this with me?”
Orla nodded, a desperation that surprised her causing heat to lick throughout her abdomen and fill her head. Fives came and knelt before her, now looking up to her dark eyes, partially shadowed by her coal black hair. “I need your words Orla, I need to know you really want this and aren’t doing something just to please me. Maker, do I want you like this, but not at the expense of you being miserable.” The corner of his mouth lifted, revealing one perfect dimple. “I want this to be good for you too.” 
A different warmth suffused her, she knew he loved her, and the amount of care he always gave her made her feel like a princess. Leaning her head down into a keldabe with him, she smiled before moving her lips to brush over his tattoo and down to his ear. “I want this, daddy, I truly do. I want to be extra good for you.” Orla punctuated her words by sliding a hand over his thigh and up to cup the bulge at his crotch. Fives groaned and grabbed the both of her wrists to stop her hands from wandering any further.
“You win this one, and you’re the best girlfriend ever!” He punctuated his sentence with a quick smooch before dragging her to stand with him. “Turn around meshla and lift your hair, let's see about getting you into this.” He started by placing the rope around the back of her neck, making sure that even halves were on either side of her neck and going down her front. Coming around he gently but confidently gripped it, already knowing the alignment of loops and knots he had to do. Within the valley between her breasts he made one knot and left a kiss on her left breast, below he made another and gave her right breast the same treatment. Just above her belly button he made one more knot, then dropped to his knees and started to trail kisses down from there, taking a moment to dip his tongue into her belly button and making Orla giggle, before he went lower and transformed it into a gasp. Five’s tongue followed the curve of her lower abdomen, trailed along her upper thigh, before he pulled back, his right hand taking its place before moving in and parting her labia with two strong, skilled fingers. 
Fives looked into her intently, studying the configuration of sensitive flesh at her apex for a moment before coming forward to kiss her lips, making out with her slit as his tongue made love to her clit. She gasped down at him, hand coming to clutch at his shoulders and the top of his head, whatever she could reach to steady herself. He was- “Oh, Fives, right there love!” He moved deeper into her heat if that was even possible, both hands having moved to her ass cheeks to pull her closer. His lips were locked around her clit, alternating and simultaneously sucking and licking with that tongue of his, that said such alternatingly inflammatory and jesting words, skilled and silver now on her. Often he would move, delve into her, kiss along her thighs and tease, build her up to a wholly satisfying end. This was something else though, a hunger both desperate and wild, focused on one goal alone, tracing along that lone and narrow path with a single minded purpose. He went on, groaning into her and holding her still as she shivered writhed, her size making no difference in his ability to hold her right where he wanted with his strength. 
Orla’s breath was escaping her in gasps and high whines, keening her need to him and she was drawn further and further up that path by him, his desperation infecting her as well. Oh he wasn’t taking his time at all, but she was adoring this direct and needy side to him. Her legs were turning to rubber and Five’s hands slid into the curve below her ass to hold her even more firmly, surely leaving marks that would be seen there later. He kept licking and laving, latched on so firmly it was as if he was feeding from her all the while she fed off the pleasure she got from him, creating a self-sustaining organism in a perpetual state of bliss and ecstasy. She felt him tying a new knot and keened into the otherwise quiet air of the room, her head tilting back and chest arching as she felt it winding ever tighter within her womb. Tighter and tighter, lick by suck, she was on the edge and just had to stretch a little further-
With a wild cry she fell, the knot unwound with a blinding intensity and she shook as her cunt clenched over nothing again and again. Fives kept at her throughout her orgasm, firmly pressing his tongue to her as she danced against it in order to carry her down. When she was passing pleasure and entering into the territory of too much, Orla put a hand on his head and gently urged it away from her and he released with an obscene pop sound. He gazed up at her, eyebrows drawn down into an expression of yearning and his eyes shining as bright as her slick on his chin. The sight was enough to draw an honest whimper from her.
“There, there meshla, you’re alright,” he cooed, now rubbing her legs and sides in order to sooth her. “You did so well, coming for me like that all wet and sweet. I was so happy when you told me how much you wanted to try something public that I just couldn’t help myself. I love you so, so much my beautiful Orla. ‘Want you to always feel good.” He rambled against her lower stomach as he rested his forehead there, praise spilling out of him like water from a too full cup. They stayed like that for a little while until she felt like she had more control over her body, the shivering and shaking dying down with her leveling breath. Finally he lifted himself and stood, hands coming to rest against her lower back as he delicately pressed her to him. “Are you good? I didn’t mean to be too much, especially before we got somewhere to be.”
Orla smiled widely, “It wasn’t too much Fives, in fact it was very much appreciated.”
He smiled back, “Well that’s good, I’d hate to have to tell the boys we had to cancel because the pussy was just too good.”
She snorted, “Oh I’m sure you would, lover.” Suddenly feeling a little shy, she continued, “Now, can you please help me finish getting ready? I don’t think I can do all these knots and twists myself.”
He reached up to cup her cheek and draw her down for a quick kiss, “Oh meshla I’d be more than happy to assist. Though, after that, and this being your first time trying this, how about we put some panties on you so the rope won’t rub as much?” 
This man- “What pair should I wear then daddy?” always so considerate of her. 
His grin was downright feral as he looked at her before taking her hand and leading her over to her wardrobe and pulling out the proper drawer, said drawer full of a rainbow of lace, cotton, satin, and mesh. Orla loved fun panties and Fives took full advantage of that, loving whenever she would ask him to choose for her so that he could picture what lay under her clothes all day. She was partial to a few pairs, but he most always chose the pair he plucked from the bunch now, a royal and baby blue number dyed in a marble pattern with ‘Want some?’ written across the ass in aurebesh. He ducked down and she again steadied herself with his shoulders as he now lifted each of her legs to fit into the slip of fabric, before drawing them up to her hips and smoothing the hems.
Then, after checking with her once again, he returned to the previously forgotten rope and from the last left knot, drew the tailings down to her apex. Twisting the ropes together some so that they’d sit between her labia, he drew them between her spread legs and went to her back to draw it up to the initial loop at the back of her neck. Pulling so it was snug but not tight, he brought both halves to come out to her hands, “Hold onto these for me love.” She complied and he came back around the front of her, taking a moment to admire what he’d done already. “Oh, yeah, it’s all coming together.” Orla snorted and lightly slapped his chest, he raised an eyebrow, “Is that the sort of game you want to play right now?”
“Maybe later.” She teasingly promised and he grinned back at her, now looping the rope from under her arms and between the first and second knot, the rope turning back on each side to return behind her back the way it had come. He followed and looped each side around the lengths that ran up her spine before indicating she should hold the rope again. He did the same process between the second and third knot and around her back before bringing up what was left of the rope and tying it off on the third knot. He stepped back then, eyes roaming up and down the planes and curves of her body, now decorated with blue and tied off with red, like a present just for him. He looked for a long, long while.
“You know what to do if this gets to be too much and you want to stop, right?”
She nodded seriously, “Five taps to your thigh, or say ‘Zillo’.”
He smiled like the sun, “Now how are we going to cover all this up?”
“Oh I really don’t know daddy, maybe you could help me with that too?”
“Orla, I have no idea what I did to deserve you but I love you so much, and I mean that with my whole ass.” He confessed with all seriousness.
Laughing again, she pressed against him and leaned down to kiss his wonderful mouth. Breaking apart again they went to inspect her clothes hanging in the closet. He reached in and pulled out a black dress with a halter top and flowy skirt that would fall about halfway down her thighs. He grinned, “Feeling like being a little risky today as well by any chance?”
“Yes please my love!” Slipping it over her head, Fives did up the three clips that secured the neck. Leaving the last bit up to her, Orla found a top to layer over it to better obscure the bondage beneath, and finished it up with a traditional self-tying corset from her people, quickly done up by pulling the two cords to either side of her and tying them in front. Meanwhile, Fives had quickly gone to change his shirt and give his face a wipe, both having been soaked by her earlier. Returning in a casual purple button up with red stitching along the collar, he looked like a treasure to be found in her people’s queen's harem.
“Looking good lover.” She told him as she bent to pull on her boots, the three inch platforms bringing her height to a full foot above his own. 
“Quacta, stifling.” he simply responded. 
Walking towards the door he asked, “Are we all ready to go meshla?” he turned and she 
smiled shyly again, feeling a blush turning the purple shades in her skin darker.
“Maybe not quite?” she intoned, moving back to the closet she opened it and pushed aside a few of his shirts to reveal a certain rack of jewelry, consisting of leather collars, some with rings on them, others otherwise decorative. “Which one do you think I should wear out today, daddy?”
In the end, they were a little late getting to the beer gardens.
🖤💜🖤
Oh I really liked writing this one. I know so far all my works have been coming out early in the morning the day after they’re supposed to be posted but I am going to try and fix that! Like the Tup and Aurelie work on the 1st, I feel like this one may come back with a part 2 because I’m really vibing with these two (and I hope y’all are too just as much as I am). 
Kinktober works
Masterlist
11 notes · View notes
fizzydrink698 · 3 years ago
Note
That soap ask/the new hyunjin fic in progress inspired me to reread take me home (also because the first time I read it, I read it before instinct so I was missing a lot of context, whoops) and hyunjin getting super turned on by readers strength?? Looooved it
That moment + wooyoung (who I’m assuming is an omega?) asking if she could lift him without getting competitive about it made me wonder though - in this au, does the omega “submissive” nature override the male ego in omega males?
Idk if that makes sense but it was interesting to me because irl I’m 5’10, so quite tall for a lady/also taller than the average man, and it’s been a fascinating lifelong case study in how men deal with traits they are potentially both attracted to and intimidated by (lots of weird objectification, lots of men using me as a human meter stick to try to prove they are 1/4 inch taller than me, lots of shorter men trying to make me say I’m 6’0” because they are 5’10”)
I would think if this were still an issue with the omega males that it would just lead to constant tension since alpha female seem to be stronger/more dominant generally, but maybe the whole concept of “masculinity” is different for the omega males where being bigger/stronger doesn’t really matter for their self-image at all? Idk it just struck me that in neither of those cases did the guys try to one up her in any way. The abo stuff just adds a really interesting layer to the traditional gender-role dichotomy -🍁
ha! take me home is definitely a lot more fun with instinct context, yes 😂
very interesting question, as always 🥰 i ended up rambling so much on this, but that’s par for the course!
in this universe, it essentially boils down to universally-agreed perceptions. it is pretty much generally agreed that alphas are stronger than omegas. absolutely. if an omega cannot beat an alpha in an arm-wrestling contest, that makes sense. that’s what should happen, regardless of gender. an omega dude is pretty much expecting not to be as strong as an alpha woman - they just probably think it will be a closer call than against an alpha dude. there is no surprise in being weaker than an alpha lady, and therefore no wounded egos.
(but obviously, there are exceptions to every rule, and i’m sure douchey gymrat omega dudes exist in this universe and would absolutely try to outlift reader. douchebags gotta douchebag.)
but when it comes to omega dude vs omega lady? or alpha dude vs alpha lady? that’s when you get the closest to real-world dude egos.
as for masculinity for omega dudes, that’s a very interesting question. i think, generally, it’s more closely tied to sexuality (like, the sexiness kind, not the sexual orientation kind) than anything else. omega dudes aren’t expecting to outlift alpha ladies, but they are kinda expecting to seduce them right out of their big strong pants. and i imagine there’s been a strange stereotype for centuries of alpha dudes trying to settle down with omega ladies, but damn, that omega dude is hot and tempting him away from the family unit. i think you would have seen far more examples of omega men as “mistresses” (misters? masters? the male equivalent of that word) to famous rulers. bc can’t get pregnant so can’t mess with the whole heir/succession thing. so, therefore, far more common to associate omega dudes with harlotry n sinful sexytimes.
but in the specific case of wooyoung, he’s just…really fuckin attracted to strong ladies. real thirsty for those big strong muscles. he wants to get manhandled. thrown about. the dream.
(fun fact, my best female friend is also pretty tall! she’s about 5’9 😊 i am almost always in heels, so any time i drop back down to wearing flats, she’s always delighted to talk about how smol i am. i enjoy. i’m tiny and adorable, and everyone should know this.)
5 notes · View notes
boys-from-santacarla · 3 years ago
Note
Note; I deeply apologize seeing as this is going to end up being long. Onto the information; My name is Ghost(mainly go by this one), Acid, Killer(more of a nickname), or Gore(more of a nickname). I go by he/they/xe/its, and I'm a dude, MLM and poly so it really doesn't matter much who it is. Born March 31st, being an Aries I'm a very loud and energetic person. I'm also very impulsive and get myself into deep shit, even if I don't realize I'm doin' it. I get overly loud when the topic is about something I enjoy or is into, if I try flirting on purpose it's ass but when I do it without realizing I get called a huge flirt. Big music and art geek, I have sketchbooks upon sketchbooks filled just sitting around in my room. I listen to a lot of rock like Queen, Guns N Roses, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, ACDC, Nickelback, KISS, Slipknot, KoRn, and on and on. Although I listen to every genre of music minus country(although there are few songs I can deal with). Big tattoo/piercing person, if you have one visible I will point it out and geek out about it. Although literally don't ask me to name a few songs unless I've been rambling on about it because I have the shittiest memory. I dye my hair so often it's surprising my hair is still healthy. I have literally bleached my hair, dyed it red and let that fade for a week, then dyed it blue and have been touching up the blue ever since then. If it wasn't due to money problems and the fact it's hard to borrow in my town my hair would probably have my hair a different color every two weeks. I ramble quite a bit and have the shittiest focus and memory, so you may have to pull me to the side and tell me to calm down. Would definitely compliment on the boys looks, specially their outfits. I'm a coffee and monster addict at this point, you'll see one or the other in my hand, and the occasional water bottle because I try to keep myself health. My love language is through touch and insulting people. Ex, "I fucking love you dumbass" or flipping you off playfully as a way of saying "i love you bitch". Smoking doesn't bother me, grew up around it my entire life. I love riding on motorcycles, no matter the weather, is it cold asf, nice idgaf, is it raining, shit lets go. I have a bad(good in some people's eyes) of using petnames/nicknames for everyone. Everyone has a wholesome petname from me and then I'll call them a whore or some shit. I cuss too much for my own good, I literally don't have a filter in my entire body. I will impulsively say shit, sometimes that's a good thing and sometimes it's a bad thing. Due to my anxiety I try to stay away from large crowds, but if I'm in them (aka on the boardwalk) I will have music blaring in my ears and my ears glued into my current sketchbook. Although I currently don't have them, I'm going to add them anyways because I'm going to end up getting them when I have the money to go to a piercer or to get a kit. I want a shit ton of piercings. Such as snake bites(lip piercing), tongue, septum, all of the piercings finished on my ears, and bridge. I've stated once I'm a big tattoo geek, so I want a quite a bit of those. I'm definitely a big "oh let's do it myself" person, and I have tried giving myself a septum piercing. (it would've worked if it wasn't for the fact I did it too low to be able to flip it up to hide it) I love the adrenaline of fights, it doesn't matter if I win or loose, although I do prefer if I win. I literally get the most random urge to fight someone for the hell of it. Probably has something to do with impulsive thoughts and shit, but oh well. I'm a big respect person, I live by the motto "you respect me, I'll respect you". I have blackouts sometimes due to rage and anxiety, so I try to keep myself from having them. I have a bad habit of rambling and saying sorry too much. I tend to repeatedly say sorry whilst rambling as I tend to get overly excited and loud when I ramble. I'm a very talkive person if I know and trust you. If you're around me and you don't get your ear talked off or messed with, you're probably not liked or
you need to leave. It's one easy way you'll be able to tell if I get along with you or not. I kinda have a whatever/punk/alt style, a lot of time I just grab something decent and throw it on. Although you'll always see me wearing a belt and my platform shoes. I'm 5'0, so my obsession with platforms grew because of my need to be tall. I wear a lot of baggy clothing, I'm definitely more of a comfort over style person.
Ok, my dude, I'll definitely pair you with...
Marko and Paul
Oh, man, you three are gonna be some threesome (and not necessarily in the sexual way lol)
Just imagine THE MESS
The boys think you're adorable when you get into the romantic mood and try to flirt but end up saying bad pick-up lines, so they'll laugh, but will twirl their hair as whoerish as possible and follow the game. Or they would get on with their manly act and fight to see who will flirt back better.
Now, the chatting will be so goddamn long! You three will go on 4 hour-long conversations that'll get from a "look at this new t-shirt I got" to "so that's why Ronald Reagan was an alien". The worst part is left to the spectators like David or Dwayne since none of you three will be the sane individual and shut y'all up.
The blondes like your drawing, and ask you to draw them or random stuff and people CONSTANTLY, so you'll have many opportunities to improve your skills and try with different models. When they happen to find some of your sketchbooks, they try to impress you or simply give a small present by drawing you or something you like, or at least make the attempt since some of the "fine pieces" as they call them, they give you are like children's school projects.
And, man, about the hair, are you blessed to have the glam diva Paul by your side to give advice and constructive criticism to your hair. He will help you choose the color and will give it style from time to time if you accept. The process to dye it will be so much fun, and so chaotic; experimenting with the pigments ends up with wounds caused from the bleach and the currently used wardrobe disposed later.
A thing they love about you is that you can stand up for yourself if needed, but they rather you not to, because they know you handle yourself and the others well, maybe too well for your good. Paul tries to take care of you as much as he can so there is no need for you to possibly get hurt. It was enough trying to control Marko so he didn't get involved in some stupid street fight every night at the boardwalk to now have to worry daily about you too. Marko shares the passion for the adrenaline of this and will think it is hot as hell, but he protects you as much as Paul, maybe a bit softer than him about it tho, but if you're in the middle of a fight and it starts to get worse than expected, he dead ass will force you to back off. He'll finish the business himself, sweetheart.
As for your love language, don't worry, these dorks will accept you playful pushes with joy, and they'll give you some of them too. But if you accidentally flip and fall some meters before hitting ground, you know the rule: laugh first, help second.
Oh, and you better get prepared for the bullying. You're the smallest in the group, so that leads to a constant attack as a hobbit. Marko joins the quip, but I mean, he'll get humiliated along. Let's just say Paul gives you two a hard time about it. With all the love of course.
They love to get out with you and the others and go to the boardwalk, but they try to take you out on days it is not that crowded, or in hours where a small amount of souls are having a stroll. But, if you happen to go out on a crowded night, they will keep you focused on having a good time, but just mention your getting uncomfortable and you'll be back at the cave in less than a minute.
Paul and Marko really love your style, they think it looks badass and try to match tough outfits with you from time to time. Giving you cool shirts and leather jackets with some patches on them that they think are awesome. Don't ask why some of the clothes have strange-colored stains on them tho.
They go with you to get you ears or nose pierced from the moment you three decided doing it diy style was a bad idea cuz y'all ended up with a bleeding nose and an ear infection the first time of trying it, and because there's no voice of reason in the threesome, Star and Dwayne had to give you kids a very long lecture of not doing those things by yourself.
8 notes · View notes
opportunity-rover · 4 years ago
Text
y’all knew the second rover learned one (1) more piece of Ranboo lore I’d be on here doing some analysis so here we go folks (all under the cut bc it gets a little long <3)
for reference:
an enderman is 2.9 blocks tall normally and 3.25 when aggro, and since one block=1 meter (according to Ranboo), then an enderman is normally 9′5, and 10′7 aggro. 
this supports the ‘different states of being’ theory, that Ranboo is normally 6′7, but when aggro (or perhaps in his case, stressed out or panicking), he becomes 8′5. If this is the case, the the mob that makes up his other half (assuming it’s an in game mob and not something of his own creation) would have to be shorter, to round down to a lower height for both his normal and aggro height.
so either that is what ranboo was talking about by saying it gave something away, or that little bit about his height alluded to something about his other half. 
the heights of other mobs I’ve theorized him being:
iron golem (2.9)= 9′5
- probably wouldn’t round his height down much, as much as this is my favorite headcannon (based off some points I came up with in this post). Not as likely but still a contender. I don’t know why his height would be lower (6′7) if both his halves normal height is 9′5, but let me dream ok
skeleton (1.9)= 6′2
- would make sense for the rounding the height down theory, but I did watch him kill a skeleton in the same stream, which he has avoided for a while but makes me a little sus. 
ghast (4)= 13′1 
-holy cow probably not this one, as he’s denied it to death in canon as well as the fact that the height difference would significantly trend the average height upwards, not down. 
dog/wolf (.85)= 2′8
-while it would round down the height, it would be a significant one and I don’t really see too much evidence of this being a possibility other than his friendliness towards dogs and slightly the coloration.
snow golem (1.9)= 6′2
-again accounts for the down-trend in his height, fits with the colors of Ranboo’s other half, and makes sense with his whole ‘pumpkins sure are cool’ thing that he had going- plus the random pumpkin house he built. I think this one at first glance seems like a lame second half, but it’s kinda cool considered they’re one of the strats used to beat the end. I’ve used them before to keep the endearment off of me while I fight the dragon. Plus, Ranboo has been around themself Ince the beginning of the smp (the ice cream shop, decorating for the festival, etc) and seems pretty friendly towards them. He also seems to be fine in cold environments, like where he’s living now, and carries snowballs in his inventory frequently. Snow golems also don’t like water, but this doesn’t line up with all the nether references that Ranboo has been making.
zombified piglin (1.95)= 6′4
-would account for the height change, and the decomposing side of the Piglin (the exposed skeleton) would match with Raboo’s left side colors. Plus, it would explain his interest in the nether and his lack of fear for lava. However, he has killed a lot of these in the past. 
there are a couple more mobs I’ve considered (stray, vex, silverfish, shulker), but I don’t want to make this post any longer than it already is going to be lol so I’m cutting myself off there
and then my for fun theories:
there is a theory about him being a shapeshifter, which I don’t really buy into (he has two very distinct sides, we’ve never seen scenes of him changing entire forms) but just for shits and giggles if he was, I’d kinda theorize he was a blob that could shapeshift into different forms. Specifically, a blob like Dream. It would make sense for the color of his other half, and for the voice in his head, but I’m not entirely sold on the theory so I’m not fully sold on it.
there's a mob called the agent, which looks like this:
Tumblr media
It’s only available in Minecraft: Education Edition, and to my knowledge something that’s not common knowledge in the Minecraft community, so Ranboo probably wouldn’t look at something like this when considering his other half. However, it is one of my favorite (if not completely out there) theories. Not only does the colors match up, with he red in the center and the lighter color otherwise, but also there’s some cool possibilities here since the agent is connected to code. The agent is something that’s controlled, which would work with the whole ‘Dream controlling Ranboo and him not remembering it’ theme. However it’s not very likely hence why it’s just one of my wild guesses :)) 
if y’all have anything to add feel free, as you can see I find it incredibly interesting and Ranboo is probably going to reveal something completely different than anything I can think up so 👀 hit me up
35 notes · View notes
rosebush-hollow · 3 years ago
Text
My Crackpot Theory (Marvel/Star Wars)
Okay, so as a little preface, I don’t really believe this theory, but I do think that it’s really fun, and I spent way too much time on it to give up now, okay? Anyway, onto my thesis:
Spoiler Warning: What If? episodes 7 and 8
Loki (mcu loki) is a Chiss, or at least has some Chiss blood in him*. 
Now, that means he has a Chiss name, and bear with me on this, I’m only doing it for fun. In typical Chiss naming conventions, the middle part of every Chiss’ name is their ‘core’ name, and the first and last parts of their name are their family names. Mitth’raw’nuruodo becomes Thrawn, you get the idea. Obviously, Loki’s core name would be Loki. But that leaves the first and last parts of his name. I have decided that I’ll use this idea to create Loki’s Chiss name: I’ll use both Odinson and Laufeyson, with some edits of course so that the core names line up. 
So, what I’ve got is Laufeyl’ok’inson. I know that it’s very rough and very bad, as far as names go, but we can move on. Like I said, the whole naming bit was just for fun. 
Moving on! In What If? episode 7, i.e. the frat boy Thor episode, we see Loki in all of his Frost Giant glory. His appearance generally goes along the lines of dark hair, blue skin, and red eyes. What physical traits do all of the Chiss share in common? you guessed it: blue skin, red eyes, and dark hair. 
Frost Giant Loki is also very tall, and the average height for male Chiss is 1.85 meters, or 6.06 feet. Now, Frost Giant Loki is much taller that 6 feet, but 6 feet is just the average height. And according to the Frost Giant What If? wiki page, the average height for frost giants is 10 feet**.  I couldn’t find anything regarding Loki’s specific height, but assuming that he is a little taller or shorter than that average, 4 odd feet is not that big of a difference for such a far-strung theory. 
Also! Both Jotunheim and Csilla are very cold places, with Jotunheim literally being the home of the Frost Giants and Csilla being “a cold world of glaciers and snowy wastes”. This is going to be important for later, to keep your eye on that. 
Later, in Episode 8 of What If?, What If?... Ultron Won?, Ultron pushes the Watcher through many different universes, one of them being someplace that looks suspiciously like Mustafar, even featuring Darth Vader’s castle***. Assuming that this is actually Mustafar, that means that the MCU and Star Wars Cinematic Universe (the SWCU if you will) are connected, in some capacity. 
It wouldn’t be too much of stretch to say that Asgard could have potentially confused or connected Csilla an Jotunheim, and the Chiss with the Frost Giants. Considering that the Chiss isolated themselves from the rest of the galaxy, it might have been pretty hard to fact check who or what the Chiss actually were. [The Frost Giants’] gift for manipulating ice could probably be explained via some sort of biotech - Chiss technology was apparently difficult for outsiders to understand, and at one point it was rumored that Chiss hyperdrives were more advanced than the Republic, which would indicate a certain level of technological advancement, maybe even enough for biotech. 
Now for the conclusion. I am fully aware that this theory is a long shot, and all the evidence is highly circumstantial, but I thought that it was kind of fun to think about. I hope that this doesn’t sound super, super unrealistic, and again, it’s really just a crackpot theory that I wanted to share. 
*all information regarding the Chiss comes from this Wookieepedia article: https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Chiss/Legends#Society, as well as this article about Csilla https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Csilla/Legends. Please note that this information is largely from Star Wars Legends, so it is not canon in the larger Star Wars universe
**that article is linked here: https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Frost_Giants#What_If.3F_Thor_.28Earth-22260.29
***this easter egg was pointed out by a lovely individual on TikTok. Unfortunately, I failed to save the video, and I don’t remember their username. If anyone knows what video I’m talking about, or has another comparable source, please let me know.  
3 notes · View notes