#fuck you tumblr for not letting me add multiple tags that just say ‘shoulder’ it’s IMPORTANT

[polychromeedge]

step on me mommy or whatever the kids are saying these days

[springalwayscomes]

Closer: Too Close (II)

Closer Closer: Too Close (Teaser) Before this comes: Closer: Too Close Masterlist Taglist

Plot: To have each other close is something that you both always wanted, in a way or another. It’s just that… closer may be too close for you to handle.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Domestic, Humor, Friends to Lovers

Wordcount: 47.5k

Content Warning: Dirty talk, swearing, pining, mentions of masturbation, masturbation, praise, cunnilingus, cum eating, unprotected sex, mentions of blowjob, squirting, public sex, fingering, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, love making, creampie

Author’s Note: Hello, here it is!! Honestly I didn’t think I would write a second part to Closer, I felt like the end of that was the best I could give to these two, but it received so much love and when I read it again I couldn’t hold myself back. Still, I consider the first part the main one, you can read that without having to read this. I would add though, that these two here just make me want to scream for the bond they have. I didn’t say the time I would publish it to feel a little more relaxed with the editing but you asked me before and I thought I’d make it on time for 1 am KST so sorry if I kept you waiting! I hope you’ll like this, and happy birthday Jungkook! Take this as a little gift💜

P.s I hate tumblr, I had to split the story in different parts because it was too slow and apparently every post has a limit of 1000 blocks, so here you’ll be able to find the beginning of your reading:

Closer: Too Close, it’s all part of the same story!

If you want to be tagged in my taglist to get notified when my other works will come out let me know here, under this post, with a message or an ask. Feel free to talk to me for whatever, I always appreciate your messages!🫶🏻💜

Jungkook is standing not too far, eyes on the ground and hands deep in the pockets of his skinny jeans he munches on his lips nervously and you see already that he’s trying to take in deep breaths, his chest is swelling.

«Koo» you call out as you get closer. He turns immediately, eyes meeting yours without any efforts.

«What happened?» 

He shakes his head, looks over at the building in front of him. You take his side, attach your back to the wall of the restaurant.

«What is it?» you ask. 

«Talk to me,» your hand strokes his back «please?»

Silence fills the space between you, the space outside, every road near to you for a second. Time goes by slow as you wait for him to say anything, the way his breath comes out shaky makes you munch on your lips. A clacson echoes from afar and Jungkook finally opens his lips, but just to close them again for a few seconds.

«I- We’re still the same» he blurts out. 

«We’re still best friends and you’re still my friend» he doesn’t even look at you as he speaks.

«What- what does that mean? Of course, we’re still-»

«You’re still my best friend and it’s fucking killing me, Y/n» he finally faces you. What you read in his expression is scary, it makes you lower your shoulders and double check for any signs of teasing, but there’s isn’t any.

«What- I’m not following you» 

«I can’t-» he shakes his head «I can’t do this. I love you so fucking much it’s freaking killing me and you’re here putting Taehyung’s perilla leaves in his rice when I can’t even hug you in public» 

«What-»

«What what?» he exclaims, gesturing with hands «You’re still my best friend! Nothing changed and I-»

«Everything changed, Jungkook!» you can’t believe what he’s saying.

«I love you! What do you mean nothing changed?»

«It doesn’t matter- not- it matters, fuck it matters, but it doesn’t matter cause I can’t show you!» his tone raises. 

You feel the need to wrap your arms around him suddenly. You’re blowing smoke through your ears but the need to make him calm down takes over and all you end up doing is take him in your hold and squeeze him tight. Jungkook stays limp with his head hanging onto your shoulder, eyes watering as your hands stroke his back. It remembers him of when he was shaking and crying before he blurted his feelings out, the fear of losing you and the need of having you but not as close as he wants look kind of similar now. He knows, fuck he knows it deep inside him that your love is enough, more than enough actually, more than he ever could ask for, but having to restrain himself from showing it it’s so fucking hard that it’s killing him. Especially when he sees you do those little gestures for the others, while he keeps repeating himself that he should be careful. You’re not even the same as before, it’s all blurred just like his vision right now.

«Talk to me?» you whisper. He lets out a deep breath, shaky and frail, totally vulnerable now that he has you wrapped around him. He digs his nose into your skin, nuzzles in the crook of your neck just for the sake of it. He has you, he repeats to himself. He has you.

«I feel like-» he gulps «like I have you only when we’re alone. Like- you belong to me only when we’re together»

His fingers entangle with the cloth of your dress as you stroke his neck slowly. You wait for him to add more, but there’s only the raise of his chest against yours following.

«Why did you have to do that?» he whines high pitched.

«What did I do?» you hum. His digits dig into your back.

«The perilla leaf» he whines again. It hits you just now and Jungkook feels his cheek burn at his words cause he knows that it may sound childish, but it’s just- annoying. 

«You’re- the perilla leaf? You’re jealous?» you can’t believe it.

«Cause I peeled off his perilla leaf?»

«Yes!» he nuzzles his nose deeper into you, almost as if by doing so his mind could hide from the outwardly flimsy problem.

«You should do that to me! It’s intimate, too sweet to do with him!»

«Jungkook, I was helping Taehyung out, he’s my friend» 

«You helped him with your chopsticks, that you put into your mouth and eat from, and it’s- why didn’t you do it with me?» he mewls. You seriously don’t think you should be laughing right now, cause he’s serious and it’s something important for him yet you can’t help but find the situation amusing.

«You were fine on your own!» you blurt.

«And I would’ve done the same if-»

«No you wouldn’t, cause you don’t want them to know that there’s more between us» he squeezes you tighter but levels his face to yours, blinking as he takes in your closeness.

«We’re barely speaking when we’re all together. You’re so into not showing what we are that you’re barely acting like you’re my best friend, it wasn’t like this before»

«That’s not true! I-»

«The other time, you didn’t greet me,» he reminds you of what happened at Eunji’s place «yesterday when I came in you didn’t say anything»

«Cause they were there» you huff back, but he just raises his eyebrows and nods.

«Yes, but it wasn’t like this before. You- didn’t even say hi. Earlier too, all you do is… getting far. I can’t even put my arm around you anymore that- you feel the need to part, at Taehyung’s place too, why do we have to wait?» he keens at the last sentence.

«You’re far, too far and I- I can’t… I don’t like this. I feel like we’re not- like we’re back at having each other but not wholly. I want- shit, I want you. I want to have you, in front of everyone,» he blubbers as he stares down at you «I don’t want to care if they see us being too sweet or clingy and just being a couple» 

Jungkook isn’t filtering his words anymore. His chest feels heavy and now he realises that- it was this that was making him annoyed. Getting to you for a second but feeling distant the second later, this continuous game of seesaw where you’re on the same board, apparently on the same page but still so far and out of reach, you balance yourself on the same point only for just a second, and then you’re back to where you were.

His breath fans your face and your hair tickle your skin, he lays his forehead on yours: «I can’t hold it back, I’ve been holding myself back for so much time that… I don’t want to. And I know that you need time and you’re doing this to get used to us and it’s going to happen soon anyway but- I just wish I could show you. I want to do the same that Jin does with Hana and Yoongi with Hyunjoo and even Jimin with Eunji, I-» he stops himself to let out a deep breath and tries to regain his lucidity. 

He knows, he knows that you’re doing this to love him in the right way for you but… he just can’t hold it back anymore. Too much time, too many years, too many moments in which he wished he could just be more for you, too many feelings never told or shared. Your love is enough to keep him through all of this, to make him keep going without asking a second time to where you’re heading, but when you seem out of reach its just-

«It’s scary» he realises.

Silence fills the air up again and for a moment Jungkook feels as far as he’s ever been even though he’s in your arms in front of you, just an inch away.

«I’m scared» he breathes out. His eyes previously lost in thought now look at you with more focus.

«It reminds me of when we were friends and all I could do was wonder how it could be and have you only when we had sex. When I made love to you that time, I-» he shakes his head «I felt like it was going to be the most I could get of you, and I needed to cherish it and live it as much as possible cause I knew that you didn’t want more from me and that that was all I could get. Like I had to get enough from it, cause it was the closest I could have you and in the deepest way possible. That time, it felt consuming and I cried so much when you left my bed cause I knew- I knew that it was it, just that»

«Even though I had you in the deepest way possible you- you weren’t mine. And I know that it’s different now cause we talked about it and we’re trying but- I don’t want to feel this,» his fingers cradle the shirt on his chest «I don’t want to get just enough of you» 

He munches on his lips for a few seconds, eyes low on his shoes as he tries to understand the right words to say, they just get mixed up and all he can do is hoping for you to realise what he’s meaning.

«I want to love you. I wanna be sweet and gentle and I want to see your eyes shine when you look at me cause you’re in love with me as much as I’m in love with you. I don’t want to always wish for us to be alone to be able to have you in this way, and I know that you’re doing this to get used to us and feel more comfortable but it’s making me lose my mind. Taehyung is always hugging you and doing all kinds of stuff and I’m- I’m your boyfriend» it sounds more like a question than an affirmation «and I can’t even hug you as I used to cause you think they would understand. I can do it, but know just- it’s killing me»

His rant comes to an end. He just shuts his mouth, regains his breath as he looks at your face, he desperately tries to understand what you’re thinking and feeling, his heart thumps in his throat and he’s sweating even though it’s almost about to rain and there’s a soft wind blowing. Truth is, his words leave you thoughtless. You don’t know what to think, what to say, what’s the right answer. Because inside you, you’re the one who wants him wholly. You want him, crave for his love, need his lips, yearn for his comfort and words, breathe for his presence. But outside, when you’re met with the world, all you can do is face the way you are and understand what you should be doing to make this relationship solid and strong. Maybe you’ve been wrong all along and should’ve just lost your senses to him from the very beginning. You should’ve told to everyone what happened between you and should’ve just took it as it was, but something inside you doesn’t fit well with it because you just don’t feel ready enough. You love him, you love him so much you’d be ready to do everything he asks you to, but this somehow makes you quiver. 

«I’m scared too,» you breathe «cause what if- like, what if we do this and it doesn’t work? What if we’re not ready, if I can’t love you right? I know Jungkook my friend and how to love you in that way, I don’t- it’s sounds stupid, but what if the way I love you isn’t what you were seeking for me all this time and I just- let you down? If I’m not enough and everyone knows, what will we do then, these are the thoughts that stop me. Not for our friends or in general, but for us too, how will we act? I’m scared because- fuck, the thought of losing you makes me freeze in fear, Jungkook. I’m trying, I’m really trying to getting used to this but before- before it was… it didn’t feel like a thin line between us. Like, I knew that you were there even if we screamed and yelled at each other, you were just there. If we break up, our friendship… what will happen to that? What-»

«It’s not happening» he cuts you off. You shake your head.

«You say that now, but-»

«No, I say it cause it’s not happening, in any near vision of the future I have or the rarest ones» his nostrils flatter as he speaks and his tone is firm and still as a mountain on the ground, roots deep and strong in his soil.

«I loved you for six years. I went through hell just to get to this, I loved you for every second of the day and all I did was be beside you,» he clenches his jaw «it’s simply not happening. For me, at least. I know what I feel, and I know that the only reason I kept staying beside you was because of you, simply. I love you» his eyes are watering.

«I love you so much that I don’t picture myself without you. I don’t see a future where you’re not in it, and even though I know I could live without you, I just don’t want that» he shakes his head with vigour, his eyes glued to yours make you gulp harshly.

 «Even when we fight, even now. It’s still the same as before, you can yell at me and tell me that you hate me, that I’m annoying, I’m a jerk or whatever the hell you want but- I’m grounded. I don’t move, I don’t care. If there’s a scenario in which you won’t love me anymore then-» he cuts himself off, his right eye spilling out a tear that marks his cheek «all I could do would be to accept it. But that won’t happen for me. I know it, it won’t. I’ll be waiting with my arms open like I told you last time and the time before, even in this kind of relationship. You’re still my best friend, other than my partner and- I won’t waver. I promise you, and I’m so sorry if in some way I made you think that you couldn’t love me in the way I want you to cause- no» he scoffs as his eyes fill up more with tears.

«Hell, no. There’s no one that could love me in a better way, I- your love is just- it consumes me. It makes me feel in all kinds of way and I can’t get enough of it. I want it, all the time and in every situation because of that» he sniffles and licks his lips, the salty taste of tears makes him look down once more to the ground.

«I don’t want to pressure you. I don’t want to do anything that might scare you off and I’m as scared as you now cause- what if you’re saying this cause you’re- you’re giving up? You don’t want… I can’t even say it»

«Jungkook, no» something inside you makes you grab him by his shoulders. His lips are reddish and his cheeks wet make your eyes tingle. Shit, no.

«What if I scared you off with everything I said? You might say no now but if you’re not ready to tell them, it means you’re insecure about us, right?» his lips tremble slightly and god, your heart clenches. 

«You don’t know if there’s a future for us, what I see isn’t there for you» his voice is so thin that you feel you’re about to break. And as if it wasn’t enough, it starts to rain almost as if someone from the clouds was listening ready to answer to all of his negative thoughts with a sign. His eyes stay on yours though, a shadow of fear lights them up just to hide between his pupils a second later. Jungkook munches the inside of his upper lip.

«You know I don’t move fast and I like things to take their time, right? It was just what I feel but it doesn’t have to be what you feel now, but I love you. For real baby, it doesn’t matter if for now you don’t see us together in the future, just-»

«I see that, Jungkook» you stop his words with a caress of your hand on his wet cheek, nodding. You could- you couldn’t bare the thought of him having such worries in his mind, not when your soul is so intertwined with his that you can’t see anymore where yours starts and ends.

«I see it, but it feels scary cause we’ve never been on this path before. It’s different, but I see us in that way. I’m just scared that my fantasy might not become reality, that’s- that’s why I wanted to get used to this first but now- I can’t» you shake your head. You see his face go from relieved to understanding to scared again, hands grabbing your sides at the fear of you walking away and out of his reach for the last part of your statement. He tells himself to breathe, to just wait for you to speak and relax but all he can do is hold his breath until he’s running out of air.

«I can’t do this if it hurts you. I don’t want to, so- what… what do you think we should do? Do you want to tell them? Do you-»

«I didn’t tell you all of that to convince you to tell them. It was just becoming too much and I couldn’t hold it anymore in, you don’t have to- I mean, maybe I hoped you would’ve, but you don’t have to» he pulls you closer to nuzzle his face against your neck once more. His tears wet your skin and you feel his hot breath fanning you when he realises a sigh at the contact, your body still close and your arms wrapping around him once more just as you did at the beginning of your talk. It’s reassuring, familiar. It makes him relax a bit and melt into you.

«To have you like this it’s not enough because I wish I could show you and give you more than what I can give when we’re only by ourselves, but if that’s what you want and need now…»

«Let’s tell them» you blurt. Your hand caresses his hair, eyes staring at the wall in front of you. Jungkook hums with a cute astonished tone that makes you scoff and tell yourself that it will be okay, his face raises to yours to study your features. You gulp down your insecurities for as much as you can and nod at him.

«Let’s tell them. I don’t want to hurt you by keep doing this. I think that-» you breathe in deeply, pondering on what his words made you realise just a second ago «my doubts are still going to be here for as long as I don’t get comfortable enough with this, like with myself not being scared. If it will take long, we’ll have to act like this for too much time? And I guess that if my fears are going to become real it will happen anyway even if they don’t know»

«What do you mean it will take long?» he smacks your asscheek lightly, a endearing smile appears on his lips. It makes you smile too.

«It will take long to get used to me loving you?» he scoffs loudly, eyes moving to the side for a second and then getting back to yours.

You giggle at him, squeeze him tighter «You know what I mean» you huff. 

«And yes, I’m still not used to you loving me in this way too» 

«I will help you get used to it,» he pecks your cheek «just please do what you feel more comfortable to. Don’t feel pressured or forced, I don’t wanna do that. Whatever way, baby. I’m willing to accept whatever you can give me»

«Let’s not do that anymore,» you let out a shaky breath «maybe I need to feel a bit of pressure to do this, so please pressure me? Let’s go inside and just tell them? Pressure me, please» 

Jungkook doesn’t mean to, but he laughs at your words. He laughs and throws his head back, hair a bit damp and laughter crystal clear and high pitched. Only when he comes back with his eyes on you the corners of his lips lower and set themselves on a little, sweet and reassuring smile that makes your heart fuller.

«Y/n, I can really wait. But just reassure me from time to time cause I’ve been holding back for so much and sometimes-»

«Can you reassure me too, now? And push me over the edge a little? It’s- bad to say it but I think I really needed for you to break out like this to make me gather the courage to face what really scared me. I think that it will help me to have you like this, in other situations too? Maybe it will feel more like before and my mind will stop drawing the line between friendship and- this, and realise that it’s just the same as before» 

You really believe it, or at least have faith in it. Maybe feeling him the way you used to feel him before, without having to worry of getting yourselves away from the eyes of your friends or the others in general will make you feel more comfortable, more familiar with what you’re sharing without the fear of losing it, because it’s just the same as before. Jungkook is still your best friend, will always be. You want him to tease you when your hair are both grey and to kiss you when your energies won’t be as high as now, bring some comfort and sense of youthful to your older days. To be honest, you always had that image in your mind. Even when you didn’t know what you were feeling… Jungkook was always there, in your farthest visions of future, teasing and annoying the hell out of you with his ways but still there after all the time. It’s just the same as before with this too, you guess.

«And this? What’s this?» he pinches your hip teasingly, making you hiss at him.

«Aish, Jungkook!» you keen at the muffled pain and he beams lightly, covering the injured zone with his hand. 

«Sorry,» he pouts, eyes big «does it sting?»

«A little, I felt better before» you scoff.

«This what?» you echo, he clicks his tongue.

«You said friendship and this. What’s this?» he’s smiling even as he speaks, cheekbones high. And with his eyes so deep and profound that shine even under the light drops of the rain you can see it from a mile away that he just wants to hear you say it out loud. 

«This,» you peck his petals sweetly, his bottom lip sticks out a little to maintain the contact just a millisecond more as you part, eyes dreamy «relationship?» 

He stretches out a hum: «So I’m you’re boyfriend now?» he scoffs.

You raise your eyebrows. 

«You said that before. I was just following»

«Keep following then, I like it» he titters, doing his labelled nose scrunch that makes your insides twist and turn.

«We’re in a relationship» he hums again, all smiley and lovey-dovey. You shake your head.

«Are you a teen or what?» you laugh. His chuckles make the sound of the rain become faint until it’s just indistinct silence.

«Yah, stop teasing me! We never said that out loud» 

«Just this once» you let go, slapping his asscheek.

«I think you have a problem with my butt,» he clicks his tongue «you like it a little too much, why do you slap it all the time?» he giggles.

«Aish, stop that. We should go back in» you shrug, Jungkook squeezes you just once more.

«That was- I was trying to push you over the edge?» he doesn’t even know what he’s saying.

«Guess that didn’t work» he scoffs. You can’t hold it, you kiss his lips and god yes, this works definitely. He totally wasn’t expecting it, not when you’re outside and your friends just meters away and could come out in any second, not in this way at least. So deeply and loving and needy that he moans in your mouth and his knees feel like jelly, your tongue moves in slow motions and takes all of his love from his chest just to make it yours cause it was yours already in the first place.

«Try something else?» you coo when you part. Jungkook breathes in deep, trying to regain what’s left of his sanity after your attempt at killing him with your sweet ways. 

«Are you sure, you really want it?» his tone is serious, thoughtful as he looks for any signs of quiver on your face. Having you like this it’s too much too handle but the thought of forcing you into doing something that may make you uncomfortable feels worse. When you nod sure though, all he can do is promise to try to melt your insecurities more everyday with every part of him and love you in the most honest, vulnerable and deepest way he can. He knows it from the way you’re looking at him that you’re not going to change your mind, you’re just looking for his affirmation, you just need to be encouraged.

«If you really want to, let’s tell them,» he pecks your forehead «just, not today? I feel like they have to tell us something important and I don’t want to shift the spotlight on us»

«What something?» you wonder.

«Don’t know, but it’s weird that they invited just to celebrate officially. We all already knew they were expecting» he caresses your hip as he speaks, after all it makes sense, you guess. It’s been a while since they announced Hyunjoo was pregnant, why celebrate now? They would’ve done it sooner, maybe.

«Okay» you nod. It’s weird how you feel your body lighter, you weren’t realising it before but now you do notice the difference, and it feels- less burdensome. You needed this to let go of what was holding you down and to face your fears, to make your roots stronger in the soil. You just wish for the day you’ll tell them to come soon, because you suppose that the sooner it will be the easiest too to just let go wholly.

«Do you remember what I texted you when you went away?» he lays his chin on your head, speaks as you bend your arms to place your hands on his shoulders. You nod slightly from under him, fingers dipping into his skin as his words flash in your mind.

«It will always be like that,» he mumbles. 

«even when you’re not beside me I’ll always keep my arms empty for you, even when things are fine. I’ll keep them open. Even if we fight and scream and hate each other in the moment» 

You kiss his neck, when you blink against him your eyelashes tickle him, Jungkook shivers and he’s not sure if it’s because he’s feeling ticklish or because you do things to him that he can’t explain.

«I love you» you murmur, eyes looking up at him. The rain has wetted you hair a bit, thankfully it isn’t too much and it’s already stopping, but even like this you look like you were painted by the gods themselves to him. He holds his breath, smiles first with his eyes.

«I love you too, love»

When you came in your friends were cheerfully talking about Yoongi and Hyunjoo, when you strolled to the table your eyes met yours to check how you were doing. The smile that Jungkook flashed seemed enough to reassure them, making them go back to their conversation, Namjoon peeking over to double check Jungkook’s features. 

He takes his sit, hands resting on his lap before he looks at the dish still full in front of him. The rice has cooled but he’s hungry and so are you, you hear Jimin ask meat to Jin and Yoongi, Hoseok scolds him and Taehyung laughs at his request, Eunji shakes her head. You eat your perilla leaf with the rice and linger in the slightly minty flavour, humming in contentment at the taste. Taehyung’s dish is empty and you feel his gaze pierce right through you as he peeks at Jungkook from time to time, obviously trying to understand his mood and what happened. You wonder if he knows at least a bit, if the others know too. Maybe Jungkook told them when he had feelings for you? 

Eunji kicks her foot on your knee, eyes big and full of questions and you just shrug at her, making her click her tongue in annoyance. She must be thinking that you’re back to sleeping with Jungkook. You decide not to care for now, bringing another bite of food in your mouth, you will tell her soon. The evening goes on cheerfully just like most of the times; Jin talks about the restaurant, Hoseok tells you stories about his new class of dancers, Namjoon talks about the book he read recently and how it made him think about what Yoongi and Hyunjoo have.

«Yah, geumanhae» Yoongi moves his hands in front of his face, his cheeks red but he’s smiling.

«Hyung, for real!» you can say that Namjoon is enjoying making him flustered.

«It really made me think»

Hyunjoo smiles, tapping her hand on her boyfriend’s shoulder.

«What are you so shy about?»

«I’m not shy, I’m flustered»

«That’s the same thing!»

«It isn’t!» he raises her eyebrows at her. Namjoon shakes his head. Jimin’s laughter suddenly fills the table, loud and giggly he covers his mouth with his fist as he bends over the table. 

«Sorry, but-» he laughs again «I just remembered when Yoongi hyung came home after meeting you for the first time» he points at Hyunjoo, eyes narrowed as he keeps giggling. Jungkook and you break out too, suddenly remembering the scene.

«Aish, hajima!» He whines again and throws his head back, but the scene was just so hilarious that it would be a waste not to share it.

«She has to know this» Jimin shrugs.

«What happened?»

«I was-» he keeps on laughing «I was cooking with Y/n and Jungkook was sitting on the couch. He came in staring at his phone and didn’t even see him» 

Jungkook nods: «Actually, I was laying on the couch» he snorts

«Aigoo» she already pictures where this is going.

«He sat on him-»

«He didn’t just sit! He threw himself on the couch!» Jungkook cuts him off, face contracted in a scowl of pain.

«Me and Y/n-» he laughs pointing at you, full teeth on display.

«We just heard them from the kitchen but it was hilarious. Turns out he was staring at your pictures on Instagram» you explain.

«I never thought Yoongi hyung could wait so much,» Jungkook chuckles, hands rubbing his thighs «his weight, aish he isn’t even that big but I was sleeping and suddenly- bang!» the sound effect he makes at the end sends you rolling on the floor with laughter, Yoongi’s shocked sounds still echoing in your ears.

He covers his face with his hands, Hyunjoo laughs beside him as the others do the same. She pulls him to him, the man shakes his head and hides in in her neck, hair falling over to hide him from the embarrassment. You see her whisper something to him but don’t know what she’s saying, Yoongi nods slightly and sits back straight, a big smile on his face.

«After you’re done with making fun of me, we have something to announce» he clears his throat. Hyunjoo stands up from her chair, her hand reaching his shoulder again while she looks down at you all and Yoongi takes his place beside her with a big beam, his hand cupping her belly lovingly. Jungkook’s eyes shot wide open, lips contracted in a “o”. The table fills with silence, everyone is waiting for them to speak and you can feel the excitement bubble up for the news.

«We’re expecting-» she gets cut off by the dumbass beside you.

«A girl! I can feel it» you smack your best friend’s shoulder.

«Shut up» you scold. Hyunjoo laughs, her eyes on you two.

«Yoongi» she calls. The man beside her nods.

«A princess» he scoffs looking at Jungkook, annoyed and amused at the same time.

«It’s a girl!» he literally screams. After that it’s just smiles and happiness, everyone is clapping and the restaurant gets filled with hugs and pats and words of encouragement.

Jungkook grins widely, his teeth exposed and eyebrows raised he claps his hands and gets up to hug his friend, just after Jin. Your beam is contagious and it only makes Jungkook smile more, when you look at him his eyes sparkle. Promises to be the best aunts and uncles for the soon to come baby are shared, Yoongi is already talking about some names that they thought about, Hyunjoo has her eyes wet. 

You can’t wait, nobody can’t. Seeing Yoongi get to know Hyunjoo and fall in love was one of the experiences that you feel lucky to have witnessed. You saw him madly in love, watched him when he thought that she wasn’t the type of person to go well with him because of their different personalities, saw them fall in love and fight more than a bunch of times and do it all over again. You remember when he told you he couldn’t live anymore without her, relive the time he cried with you and Jimin cause he was missing her when they had a bad fight and she needed to spend some time on her own, see them happy now after trying for a year. Their story brings tears to your eyes almost every time you think about it, it’s one of those that you would love to read about. You love both of them so much that you couldn’t wish for anything better, cause they already are the best of the best for each other, and all you can do is start to count the days until you’ll meet the result of their incredible love.

Your house is silent and the atmosphere cozy, Jungkook’s fingers are softly stroking your hair on the couch and your mind is full of him and him only. How he talked to you today, the words he said, the safeness and reassurance they brought to your uneasy mind, the love in his eyes and the salty tears on his cheeks. It fills you up until you feel an odd sense of belonging and yearning come together and take every living fibre of your body. You snuggle your nose into the side of his neck, his hand runs down your side to engulfs you into him, back against his chest and one of his legs crossing yours laid on the pillows. Jungkook’s chest is firm under you but incredibly comfortable and you find it so big that you feel the need to turn around and hide your face into it just to feel him closer. 

Jungkook lets out a airy breath, the softness of your hair makes his fingertips oversensitive just to take in every single detail of you, your body soft and totally limp on top of him to adore, to squeeze and nuzzle into. He wishes he could freeze this moment and make it last for more than he could ever ask for, remember the sensation of it all and keep it locked inside him for when he feels low-spirited or weary. 

«Have to shower» you mumble not really inclined to leave his embrace. Jungkook pecks your head sweetly, nods under you but squeezes you tighter.

«I have to shower too. Do you wanna cuddle afterwards or are you going to bed?» his cute lisp makes you smile. 

«Wanna cuddle» you munch on your lips, you wish you could see his face when you add «in the shower»

«Hmm?» his hum is one of those that slip out when he’s excited, slightly high pitched and not sure if he heard your words right.

«Let’s shower» you nod sitting up and turning your head to him. Laid on the pillows, his mouth is open and his eyebrows raised.

«Do you want to?»

«Do- do y-you mean together?» he stutters a bit, totally taken aback. His eyes are sparkling with hope and his enthusiasm is given out when he as soon as he speaks, the cute stutter habit he’s always had when he’s enthusiastic. You nod slightly and Jungkook snaps up with his eyes wide.

«Rea- really?»

«Yes,» you smile amused«if you want to?»

«Oh-aish, yes!» he nods eagerly but stops before he passes the point of not return.

«But- are you sure? We don’t ha-»

«I’m sure,» your eyes stay firm into his «I was scared of this too, I guess» 

He gulps down, hands coming back to your sides as he rests his chin on your shoulder.

«Open up to me?» his request is low, as if he doesn’t want it to sound like an obligation but more like an invitation, soft and muffled and honey-coated. When he kisses your cheek lovingly you dive deeper against him, the firmness of his chest behind you and the cage of his arms around you make you feel safe in a way that you could never describe. You feel the most frail when you’re in his arms and the most intrepid you’ve ever been at the same time, it makes your chest swell up with a feeling that is bittersweet and so deep that you feel like drowning. 

«I guess- I didn’t want us to get too sexual?» you shake your head.

«I thought that it would end up with us fucking, every time you asked me to shower together. It’s probably just the same as sleeping in the same bed, I guess»

Jungkook munches on his lips, slightly nodding.

«You don’t want that?» he’s not asking because he wants that to happen but to understand you fully. 

«I don’t know,» you huff «I didn’t, I think. But now I don’t know, like- I was scared that by being too sexual we- kind of lost sense? And I wanted things to move at their pace, not to rush. We’re living together already and it’s like we kind of skipped the part of the beginning of the relationship, the part where you get to know each other»

«I don��t think we’re in that part,» he lets out, hands rubbing your hips «we’ve been in that part already, I think? We know each other- deeply too»

«I know, but like- know each other in a relationship like the one we have now» you explain. He nods again.

«I got what you mean. But I think it’s- we love each other» he brushes his nose against the column of your neck just to tickle you «if we’re already there, how can we go back to getting to know each other? Like- I know what you mean, but I think that only comes with time? Wether you start from something that’s different from what we already had or from our starting point- I just know that I love you. And by that I mean that I want you in whatever way you’re able to have me and be. I don’t care if I find something that I might find annoying or- I love you. I just- want you»

«I realise it now» you squeeze his cheeks between your thumb and the rest of your fingers, his lips puffy and shutting up. Jungkook frowns, hums annoyed but let’s you do your thing, booping his nose and kissing the soft flesh of his cheek. When you let go, his act of displease shatters in pieces and a big beam replaces it on full display.

«I didn’t before» 

His arms squeeze you more, he shuts his lips for a while. The feelings in his chest get so mixed up that it’s hard to discern them, he just wishes that you could read through them all to see how transparent they are in fact.

«I love you» he hums, tone childish. It’s so out of the blue that you find yourself giggling and shaking your head, eyes rolling at the way he squeezes you to him. He bites your shoulder lightly as he nuzzles his nose into your skin.

«And what do you mean by losing sense?» he suddenly stops, voice muffled. 

«Losing sense, like- only getting sexual? Doing things just to get there, I don’t want that»

«I don’t want that neither, baby» he breathes and rests his chin on you again, hydrates his lips with his tongue.

«I love when we have sex. I love it, it’s like- some type of magic and it’s so intimate and vulnerable that it makes me overwhelmed every time, but- I don’t want you to think that it has to end like that» he shakes his head.

«If it ends like that it’s good, but it doesn’t have to. I love doing things with you just for the sake of it, cause you- you’re the person I want to share myself with» 

Your head rests on his shoulder as you let his words engulf you, tone lovely and calm.

«And it- we don’t lose sense if we feel like being sexual too. It’s beautiful, it means that we’re comfortable with each other that much»

«I know but when I think about it, it scares me» you let out a heavy breath.

«Eunji… do you remember how it ended up with that guy?»

«Eunji, what- what guy? The security guard?» he frowns totally out of place. You smack him on his thigh lightly, a scoff coming out of your lips. 

«No, Koo. Hyun?»

«Hyun?» his mind is totally blank.

«Hyun, the lawyer. The guy that she was friend with for a little and-»

«Oh! Yes, I remember him» he nods eagerly. 

«What does it have to do with us?»

«I don’t know, but- when I talked to her about us and we weren’t together yet she remembered me of what happened with him. I guess that thought blocked me too»

«Eunji knows?» he turns his face, eyes big and lips open.

«She doesn’t, she knows that we used to sleep together though»

He scrunches his nose, goes back to caress your hair.

«What happened with him was- it’s not us. They didn’t have anything. We- we love each other. We’ve been friends for a long time, we saw each other in every way» he puffs out a breath.

«And even if there are times when we’ll get too sexual, that doesn’t mean that we’re just looking for sex. There’s more, there’s trust, there’s-» he stops his rant because you peck his nose «stop that, I’m trying to be serious» 

«Oh, sorry» you face in front of you and Jungkook scoffs, giving up just to peck your cheek.

«Baby, for real» he whispers.

«I think it’s normal that in a relationship there are times or periods when there is a high sex drive but that doesn’t mean that we’re looking just for sex or love each other any less» 

«I know,» you nod «I’m just scared to get too caught up into it and lose what I have around me- like, lose you»

«It won’t happen,» he clicks his tongue «it won’t cause even if we get too caught up with it, it’s not- just sex» he digs his chin deeper into your shoulder.

«It’s more, I’m not fucking you just because you’re sexy or I find you attractive- it’s a whole different thing. It’s-» his fingers turn your face to make your eyes meet him.

«I’m making love to you. Even if we fuck each others brains out or have sex in Taehyung’s bathroom, there’s always more. There are always emotions and feelings and how much I love you. Every time, every single time. Even- if it’s not romantic at all and it’s just rough and needy, I- love you»

«And to know that you could trust me that much- to make me have that part of you, to allow me to live you in that way too makes me feel so fucking good and happy. How- how could that make us senseless or pointless? It’s love, I’m always making love to you»

«Fuck, stop. You’re gonna make me cry» you don’t think you can hold his words for much longer. Hearing him say things like this makes your brain melt and your insides twist with warmth and safeness and you wish you could just hide from the world and cry your eyes out for how much and how deeply you love him. 

He huffs a giggle, kisses your nose, stares at your wet eyes. Jungkook wants to give you everything you never had, everything he can give and more than both you and him could ever imagine. He wants to shower you with all the love he has inside him and with every little spark of it that colors the world. If he could take the light from the sun just to add a drop of love and appreciation to your world, he would do it right the fuck now. You make him want to lose himself and never find it again, live in the melody of your laughter and only see the sight of your smile. If his senses could be commanded he’d feel only when his fingers trace your curves and every part of you, from head to toe, he’d smell only your perfume and taste only your kisses and your salty tears, hear only your laughter and your voice when you sing and see only your eyes and how your shoulders swell when you laugh. 

«I’m- I’m here for whatever you’re willing to give and I’ll wait for the things that you don’t feel comfortable with yet» he whispers. 

You smile, and fuck, the love he has for you. An incredible amount that he never thought was possible, so much that it makes him crazy and desperate to give it in every way possible. His lips peck yours softly, so lovingly and so feather-like that he feels you shiver against him, back pressed into his chest and his arms wrapped so tight that a world outside doesn’t exist anymore. His lips are soft and they make you addicted with the feelings they bring, your eyes stay shut even when you part. He keeps you close and rests his forehead on yours, smiles at your expression as lost as his.

«I love you,» his thumb strokes your cheek «so freaking much I can’t put it into words»

«I know,» you push yourself more into his hand «it’s the same for me. I just- love you» 

When you open your eyes, you’re not sure where the hell you’ve been for all your life. Because to lose this sight- for god’s sake, it’s almost laughable how anyone wouldn’t stop to just stare at him. Yours, he’s yours and he’s always been and for all this time, all these worries and all your insecurities- they can’t outbalance this. Nothing can, nothing when he makes you feel this way, this loved and cherished. 

«Let’s shower,» you puff out «let’s shower» 

As if it wasn’t clear enough for him the first time. Jungkook nods and his lips peck you once more, when he looks in your eyes to check if you’re certain about what you’re doing they don’t shift, don’t budge for a nanosecond. They stay firm, staring into his pupils and spurring him on more to leave the couch and take care of you and show you how deep his love is. And fuck, it’s so deep that there’s no end to him anymore. 

There’s no end to the affection his arms carry with your body between them, holding you close to him even when he’s standing and you’re smacking his ass lightly and making him giggle, no such depth was ever measured in the world. The intimacy between your souls could never be described, it’s so emotional and compelling that you both feel it in your bones, in every nerve, every fibre of your bodies. You’re addicted to it, in love with it and with him with every living piece of you. 

You stroll to the bathroom, Jungkook engulfs you in his arms, he stomps his feet against the floor making the both of you stumble twice, giggles filling the air as you enter the room. He opens the water of his shower, checks the temperature before taking off his clothes and laying them on the counter beside the sink, eyes meeting yours when he sees you standing still and eyeing him. Totally naked, you can’t tear you eyes off of him. It’s like his body was painted by Botticelli, Da Vinci maybe. Lines perfect, every ridge and curve sweet but incredibly excruciating, agonisingly beautiful so. Skin yellowish and fair, lips reddish and full, long slender fingers beckoning you to him to hold you close, closer. Close is never enough with you. His cock is half hard but Jungkook doesn’t want to do anything about it, he just wants to feel you like this, have you in this way, linger in the trust you have in him. 

You let him hug you, let him kiss you drunk. 

Your fingers on his skin feel so good that he doesn’t think he will ever get used to them, they stroke his back as his hands reach the hem of your dress to help you out of it. 

«I love you so much» he lays a smooch on your cheek. 

«We say it so much» you mumble as you hide your face in his neck. He kisses your shoulder, lets his hand dance on your back in lovingly motions.

«Cause we love so much» he breathes.

His words leave you spinning, your mind is empty but your heart is full and swollen, your eyes travel back on his face to flash a smile at him. 

«Undress me» you nod. 

He beams devilishly, «Uh? We’re getting confident»

«Oh, shut up,» you shake your head «gonna do it myself-»

«No, no. Let me» he holds you still. His fingers lower back to the edge of your dress, as he grabs the cloth to make it slide on your skin he keeps his sight on your face and feels his lungs losing air when your cheeks color of a faint shade of red, the dress halfway over your hips. His soft lips caress your nose, your forehead and a second later he slides the material off of your arms in the air and over your head- no, he leaves it on your face.

«Jungkook!» your irritated tone makes him  erupt in a laugh and finally he takes it off. Your lips are contracted in a pout, a scowl on your face.

«You’re so annoying» you whine. 

«I like annoying you,» he pulls you closer to him «you’re cute when you pout»

«I’m always cute» you nod jokingly.

«Aish, too much is too much,» he shakes his head, his right hand smacking your asscheek lightly «should I shut you up?»

«That’s rude» your eyes widen.

«Why? With kisses?» he clicks his tongue. 

«Kisses? Oh-» 

«You thought I meant-» he stops to laugh, high pitched and melodious «rude?»

«The way you said it was rude, not the- wait, don’t laugh! So annoying, I hate you» 

«Aish, such a crybaby» he fondles you into his arms, his nose nuzzles into the crook of your neck and you let the blood that rushed to your cheeks get back to its usual path by hiding your face on his chest. 

«It’s not the right moment for that,» he breathes «now I just want to take care of you and shower you with kisses» 

«Your cock is hard» you hum sternly, making him scoff.

«Let it be,» he puffs out «we don’t have to do anything about it. I just wanna have you like this,» he kisses your shoulder blade «close and intimate» 

His fingers tickle your thighs, they slide perfectly over the cloth of your stockings and he hums on your skin when he hooks his fingers over the band, parting enough to take them off. When he’s done, you finally build up the courage to look down, and god- you wish you didn’t. He’s on his knees, starry night eyes looking up at you, deep and love drunk, totally lost. He look ethereal and so fucking pretty that your knees buckle and you have to close your eyes for a second, only to regain what’s left of yourself. 

Jungkook’s fingers travel all the way up from your ankles to your calves, to your knees and your thighs, until they reach your hips and he cups them softly. He kisses under your belly button, makes you look back down at him and a second later he’s lowering your panties and you feel so exposed that you want to cover your eyes. It’s stupid, you know it well but to have him like this, looking at you with his nose almost against your pelvis and his eyes drawing stars in your sky, it’s different than having him in bed. You were making love all the times you were naked in front of each other, and even though you were so exposed that you felt your soul burn with his touch, having him like this hits in a different way, the same intensity, the same love for each other, the same feeling in your chests but just with a different meaning to it. 

You lift your feet one at a time to help him get the garment fully off, balancing on one leg and steading yourself with your hand on his shoulder, but when he takes them off he doesn’t get up. You see his cock twitch but his eyes never leave yours, not even when he gets closer and lays the sweetest and consuming kiss on your mound, so chaste but loving and addicting that your heart stops beating. He pushes on the ball of his feet and stands up to tower again over you, a little smile takes over his features and his eyes narrow a little, drunk by the feeling of having you like this.

Your hands move on their own, grabbing his fingers and guiding them behind your back. Jungkook smiles more, pecks your neck and your cheek, the tip of your nose and your shoulder as he fumbles with the clasp of your bra, pushes the straps down your shoulders and lets the garment slide off when he parts from you, a shiver of coldness making his way on your skin at the loss of the warmth that his body provided. He can’t wrap his head around you, how beautiful you are. Every inch of skin makes his fingers itch because he’s just that desperate to feel you, even wantonly.

«You’re breathtaking» his words comes out frail, totally vulnerable and overwhelmed.

«I love you,» he shakes his head, feeling dumb for not being able to find a word that represents his feelings more «I love having this part of you- so exposed, just for me» his shoulders fall, and it seems to you that he’s almost surrendering to the hold you have on him; in fact, he is.

«I promise you, baby, there’s always more. It’s not just when we’re having sex, it’s whatever we do. Whatever I do, there’s always more. You’re- you’re love. You’re the meaning of love- for me. Everything I do, even when I annoy you or just make dinner for you or even when we fight or- it’s because I love you so much it fucking overwhelms me. Whatever we do together, don’t ever think that it’s for the sake of it cause- fuck, I love you all the time, everything I do» he breathes. 

The distance between you doesn’t get along to the feeling of warmth you’re craving for, especially when he’s opening himself so much that his chest is looking for air and his voice is full of tenderness. You take a step closer and hold him in your embrace, Jungkook breaths out heavily, his hair tickle your skin.

«So don’t ever think that it’s just about being sexual. It’s not- it’s not like that at all. Every time you- every time you look at me, I could combust just by that. Like this too, having you like this now too makes me feel like I’m- don’t know, can’t even explain it» his voice gets more feeble as he speaks until all there’s left is his whisper in your ears and the thumbing sound of your heart echoing in the bathroom. 

Jungkook is- fucking hell, he’s your world. The colours you perceive, the air you breathe, the softness of your sheets, the warmth of the fire in full winter, your favorite dish, the feeling you get when a long and tiring day is finally over. He’s everything and anything all at once and it makes you want to let go of yourself and find yourself at the same time, love deeper than what you could’ve ever imagined. 

«I won’t,» you hug him tightly «I won’t do it anymore. Thank you, for- loving me as much as I love you» 

Your words have a strange hold on him, he smiles so fucking big but his eyes tingle and he has to bite down on his lips to keep himself rational, cause fuck- he’s still not used to this either. To finally feel you his, under his fingers, in his hold, to have your heart. All the love he had to held back sometimes slaps him in the face and when he faces the reality now it just makes him dizzy. 

«Don’t- thank me for that,» he nuzzles his face into you more «I don’t think I could ever stop» 

You feel something wet on your skin, just slightly. Jungkook sniffles, and then you get it. Your hands fumble with his hair as you kiss his skin, your fingertips dig into his back.

«Did I- did I make you-»

«No,-» he gulps down, raises his head to look at your eyes «I’m- just- fuck, I’m sorry I cry a lot lately» he scoffs to himself.

«No! No baby, just- let it out» you peck his nose. He scrunches it cutely, takes in a staggered breath.

«It’s nothing, I just- sometimes it still doesn’t feel real. To hear you say that- made me emotional, I guess» 

You smile at him. It’s sweet and home-like and a second later you’re squeezing him tighter to you and Jungkook decides to let go. He lays his chin back on your shoulder, closes his eyes, lets your motions lull him and your touch relax him. His cock is tight between you and with your movements you make it a little uncomfortable for him not to focus on the way it throbs and perceives every slight touch as pleasure, but he just lets it be. Having you close like this, so intimately and intoxicatingly bare for him makes him pine to find new ways of loving you, new ways of worshipping every invisible part of you, even the littles ones that no one else ever noticed, not even yourself. 

«Are we going in?» you puff out on his skin. He nods his head but doesn’t part yet, strokes your hair just once more. 

«I wanna lather you all up» he giggles airily and backs away, beckons you with his head to walk in the shower. Your cheeks are flushed when you take a step towards it with his eyes on you and your body, totally love drunk. He doesn’t look at you with mischief, with something that screams for more though, Jungkook just feels grateful to have this part of you. And when he comes in too you feel your heart beat louder because when you look up at him you see it truly, without even having to try; he loves and burns and drowns and breathes just to do it all over again, with you taking over every part of him. It makes you defenceless, more than you could ever handle. It makes you give up, let your hands fall and just open up to him in every way possible cause the safeness you feel with him, in this little space, right against each other, totally exposed and vulnerable, couldn’t reach you even if you were covered and tucked in the warmest blanket. 

You don’t even realise you’re drenched under the water until his hair stick to his face and he pushes them back to regain his sight, totally entranced when he hugs you under the jet. It’s warm, cozy and it feels like the sweetest place in the world when his fingers dig slightly into your skin and he nuzzles against you. He does it a lot, a habit that he doesn’t think he could ever get tired of. It makes him feel closer even if it’s just for a second, it’s intimate and he likes the feeling of you so much that not doing it almost feels like squandering. 

«Thank you» it’s muffled by the sound of the water and his lips on your skin but it’s enough to reach your ears.

«For what?» you hug him back. Jungkook hums lightly.

«For letting me have this part of you,» he whispers «for trusting me this much»

«You know you’re the person I probably trust the most»

«I know,» his lips lay a mushy kiss on your shoulder «thank you» 

You smile and try to move slightly but with his body towering over yours it’s kind of mocking how you don’t manage to move of an inch.

«Soap,» you call out «come to me!»

And Jungkook is back with his giggles, crystal clear even under the water dropping down and filling up the space. 

«What? Why are you like this?» he snickers.

«You won’t make me move!» you laugh.

«I told you I’ll do it,» he clicks his tongue, still giggly «if you call it do you think it’ll come over?»

«Maybe?» you snort «Who knows?»

«Aish, jinjja» he shakes his head incredulous, his nose scrunching when he parts to look at you.

«Don’t scrunch your nose at me» you point your finger on his chest.

«What- why?» 

«Too cute,» your fingertip taps on his pec for twice or thrice «can’t stay focused»

«Too bad that now I know it?» he beams, pushes a strand of your hair away from your face.

«Aish- don’t use it against me,» you warn «are you gonna lather me or not?»

«Did I told you you’re annoying today?» he scrunches his nose, once more.

«You did,» you nod «I’m used to it»

«Unbelievable» his hand lays with a snack on your asscheek.

«Yah, and you say I’m the one who always slaps you»

«I still didn’t get the chance to kiss it» he munches on his lips, obviously teasing you with the conversation you had while making love for the first time. 

«First you should focus on the bodywash»

He scoffs, gets the bottle from the shelf behind you.

«Okay, now do I get to kiss it?»

«Jungkook!» you literally shriek and he laughs so loud that it becomes all you can hear. You watch his eyes narrow and his head fall back, his shoulders raise and fall and all you want to do is make your annoying best friend shut up and stop being so pestiferous with his teasing but you end up laughing too. Jungkook holds you against him and god, you don’t want to live another life if it doesn’t include this too. 

«I’ll stop-» he laughs «I’m just teasing you»

«I know,» you nod «you do it a lot»

He gains back his composure, closes the jet and squashes the bottle to get the right amount of soap on his hand, putting it down just behind you afterwards. He rubs his hands together a bit, just enough to get some lather. He kneels down. Looks up at you. Smiles. His hands grace over your left thigh, just above your knee.

«Does it bother you?» he coos. You take a deep breath to gather your mental strength.

«Not really» 

«It comes so naturally with you,» he smiles, his hands start to caress your skin with just the right amount of pressure as he rubs the soap in «we’ve always been like this»

«You more than me,» you shrug «it’s normal»

«It is,» he kisses your hip and you feel like you’re going to die for how much you love him «it’s my love language, I guess»

«I think it’s just your language» you scoff. Your hand moves fast and a second later he’s squeezing his eyes and hissing in surprise at your mischief actions, soaked under the jet while you giggle. You close it just a second later, glancing at the way he bites on his lips.

«Its yours too, apparently» he squeezes your thigh, lowers his hands on your calf. 

«Sometimes I wonder if it’s my fault that you’re like this»

«Like this what?» you help yourself on his shoulder, Jungkook beams at you lovingly but his teasing goes on.

«So annoying» he moves on on lathering your foot, the tickly feeling of his fingers makes you wince.

«Oh, yes» you nod.

«I had to survive one way or the other» 

«Kiss?» he puckers his lips.

«Hhm?»

«Kiss, give me a kiss?» he coos all smiley. It makes you scoff, how he can move from one thing to another so quickly. Jungkook lets go of your leg as he’s done with his ministrations and you bend to lower yourself to him, his lips still wrinkled and waiting. It’s wet and just a peck but it makes you see the stars and the ocean all at once, the closeness of it. 

He lathers your other thigh, your knee, your calf, your foot, gets back up to tell you how pretty and beautiful you are, teases you some more. And then he‘s kneeling again and squashing the bottle of the intimate soap, you didn’t even notice him grabbing it from the shelf behind you, with his eyes focused on the task as he rubs his hands together. 

He kisses your hips one at a time, chaste and full affection, his eyes meet yours and when he smiles at you, you know he means something more: «I got you» he blows. 

His arm comes around you, his hand on the lower part of your back and the other one cups your pelvis, soft fingers laying just slightly on your lips. You hold your breath as Jungkook lets his fingers slide against you, they part your lips, move forwards and backwards to soap you up properly, rubbing against your most intimate part with such care and such platonically innocence that you feel your soul dance and smile. You feel loved all over, all inside. And when you smile back at him, gosh, it could sound stupid but he thinks this is one of the moments he’ll live again when he sleeps. When he dreams about you, heart pounding and exploding even with his eyes closed and his light snores breaking the silence of the night.

«You’re so pretty» the fingers on your back tap against your skin, his cheeks are full and his eyes starry. He lays a kiss on your mound just like he did before outside of the shower, all smiley and dovey and you want to squeeze him so hard until he bursts out in nothing but pink stars and dreamy clouds.

«Come back up here» you pat his shoulder. Jungkook nods, but only does so in his own way. He kisses slightly upper above your mound, upper again, again and again and more upwards until he passes your navel and still keeps going, he lays a path that divides you in two parts, split open all the way to the valley between your breasts and then up to the meeting point of your clavicles, to your throat and your chin. It’s intoxicating, you feel totally inebriated.

Your lips were made for him to kiss them, sure as hell they were. So soft, pillowy, consuming, breathtakingly so. It makes him desperate, he can’t help it, helpless and so fucking in love every second more. 

«You make me-» you take in a deep breath before he pecks your lips «feel like…»

«Like what?» he huffs against them, nuzzling his nose to yours.

«Don’t know. Like giving up» you puff. Jungkook snorts, scrunching his nose.

«Giving up?» he hums.

«To… everything,» it’s hard to put it into words «to your… love. Feel so overwhelmed everytime»

«If you do that…» he doesn’t finish his sentence, air running out with you so close.

«If I do that…» you smile. Jungkook breathes in through his mouth.

«I’d look after you,» he pecks your lower lip «please, give up» his tone is low, a little whiny, floaty. 

«Just for once,» his hand cups your cheek, his thumb moves upwards and downwards with the most saccharine motions «I love you so much»

«I’m doing it already,» you scoff to yourself «I do it every time. I forged up all of that because I don’t have defences around you. I’m always giving up, you’re too-» you gag on your air silently, shaking your head and trying to regain what’s left of you «inebriating»

«Let it consume you then,» he kisses your forehead «cause I can’t stop. Can’t fucking stop, it’s too much. I love you too much, I want you to feel it,» he pushes you closer to him until his chest is tight against you and his eyes still fixed into yours «cause I feel it from you. And it takes over me. You love me so good, in every possible way»

He reaches your hand and his slender fingers interlock with yours to guide your palm on his chest, just a few inches on the left from the middle. He leaves your hold just to push your palm on his skin; his heart beats under you, loud but melodious, steady and proud.

«That’s what you do to me,» he keeps his touch on your hand, fingers stroking your wrist «that’s what you’ve been doing for all these years. Not a second- there was not a second that it didn’t beat for you»

Your world spins. Even as he kisses the crown of your head sweetly and hugs you for a minute more, even when he goes back to lather the rest of you up, your hair, your word spins. You want him forever. You want him in every way, every day. You want him after a long day and on a relaxing one, on a beach somewhere lost in the world and welcoming you home, you just- can’t control it. It’s so powerful and so deep and so incredibly real and intimate that you feel grounded to earth but high flying in the sky. This is what love is. Love is Jungkook. 

He opens the jet again after lathering himself up, his hair are covered in bubbles and his cheeks full make him look like the happiest he’s ever been, eyes glittering with shining stars. He lets his hands caress you to help the water wash away the soap, lays love over every part of your body with the touch of his palm and his fingertips, kisses you when you smile and it’s too much to control himself, nuzzles his nose on you, the water spraying over your bodies and his arms caging you in. For the first time, you feel it more real, even more than before; how somewhere in a different universe you’re holding each other in the same way, older and with even more memories than what you have now. Wrinkles on his skin and hair grey but your love is still the same, still consuming and taking over the both of you. 

«Koo» you hide in his neck. 

«Love» he hums. He feels your smile on his skin.

«I want…» you curl your fingers to stroke his hips. Jungkook levels your sight with his, two of his fingers push your chin up.

«I know that we said- this isn’t heading to anything else but… I want you to make love to me» 

«Now?»

«Now,» you nod «but…»

«What?» his hand strokes your back, your cheeks flushed make him hug you tighter to show you how comfortable you can be with him. 

«Rough,» you scoff at yourself, making him giggle and raise his palm to the back of your head to stroke your nape «fuck this, I’m not good with words»

«You’re doing amazing, sweetie» he shakes his head amused «talk to me?»

You shoulders raise, chest swells as you breath in: «I want you to… the stuff you said before, do that»

Jungkook laughs at your ways, keeps your figure safe in the cage of his arms as he scrunches his nose.

«You want me to fuck you?» 

«Don’t laugh» you scold.

«I’m sorry,» he smiles «it’s just- you’re so endearing when you’re shy» 

«Koo» you whine. He kisses your neck, nods.

«You want that?» he asks, his attention totally on your face. He takes in your expression, sees universes in your eyes.

«Yes,» you pause «show me that there’s more even though I know it already» 

Clear and straight to the point. Fuck, he may explode from a second to another. 

«Rough?» he breathes. Your heart is pounding in your ears so much that the thrill makes your knees feel like jelly. 

«Rough,» you repeat «however you want it. I- want to just…» your sentence ends in silence, closing your eyes to the caresses of his fingers.

«Are you sure?» 

«I am» 

«Turn around,» he kisses your lips with tenderness but his tone is firm and your body feels so light you don’t even feel it as you do as he asks «bend down a little and put your hands against the wall»

Shit. It’s all you can think about as your chest lays on the marble. The coldness of the material makes you shiver as your hands follow, taking half a step backwards to bend for him. Jungkook stays still, totally entranced by you. Fuck, you make him crazy. Totally whipped. His head is whirling, his eyes are lost on the side view of your face and how beautiful you are with your skin glowing under the light of the bathroom, drops of water running down every inch of your body, the curve of your hips, the tenderness of your skin. God’s sake, you’re the end of him. 

«Koo» you call. He shakes his head, takes a step forward. 

«Sorry, got a little distracted» he hums against your ear, kissing your earlobe. 

«You’re so beautiful» his breath hits your neck and the air makes you shiver, he feels you moving just the slightest, your face disconnecting from the wall. 

«What are you going to do?» your tone makes him smile, curious but frail. 

His lips reach the side of your neck and they disclose a wet kiss and then another one, one more. His chest adheres to your back, the underside of his cock brushing against your asscheek makes you writhe in your spot, he’s been so hard for so long and feeling him like this makes you hold your breath, but Jungkook doesn’t lose his calm. He keeps his sight on your face, his focus on you. His arms come around you, hands cupping your stomach and fingers opening to feel your skin, they stroke and caress you just right, his touch his light but secure and it is rewarded by you squirms and shivers, he makes you want to beg for more. He travels from your navel to between your breasts, then down again. One of his hands steadies on your left hip, the digits of his other one tickle you until he stops on your mound and your breath gets cut. 

«Keep your hands on the wall» he whispers. You don’t even have time to realise what he’s saying because his fingers lower and they slide between your lips and you’re laying your head forward against the wall just at his touch. 

«I want you to let go,» he kisses your skin, licks a patch of it from just right under your head to your shoulder «and just feel good» 

His index finds your core, already wet for him. His cock twitches on you, you feel it move against your back as he gathers your wetness and moves on your clit, feather-like touch that makes you eager and yearn. 

«Can you do that for me?» he huffs. 

Your trembling breath is his answer. His finger moves on the pearl and your legs instantly squeeze around his hand at the sudden pleasure brought, his petals gifting sweet pecks on your shoulder. They make you relax your muscles and open your thighs again, his movement slow and just where you like it the most.

It lasts just for a bunch of seconds though, the air feels cold again when he parts and you close your eyes when you catch him kneeling down on the floor of the shower.

«Oh, fuck» you hiss in advance.

«You’re- I’m gonna die» your words make him laugh.

«Please don’t,» he giggles looking up at you, hands grasping the back of your thighs «just tell me if it’s too much?»

«Too much what?» 

«Anything» he kisses the lower part of your back, eyes glued to your face. His nose brushes against your skin as he lowers himself and his hands move upwards, they burn your skin even when it’s still wet, he parts your asscheeks for his sight only.

Shit, Jungkook is about to lose his mind. Too pretty. 

«Bend forwards just a little more for me?» he coos. When you do as he says, he’s able to get a better view of your pussy too and for god’s sake, he’s salivating just like she is. So wet, so freaking wet he wants to bury himself between your thighs and never face the world again. 

«Fuck, baby. Did I do that?» he hisses through his teeth, lowering his hand to part your lips better with his fingers.

«Do I make you this wet?»

«Kook…» you let out a deep breath, on the edge of your calm.

«Tell me» he moves his finger on your clit, looking back up at you. The way your mouth opens makes him move it again in the same manner, your eyebrows furrowing. 

«Tell me» he echoes. You lay your forehead against the marble.

«You do,» you whine «you make it so fucking wet, Jungkook»

«Fuck, I love when you talk to me» 

You think you’re already on the edge because fucking freaking hell, his tongue suddenly pokes your clit and your legs shake and shit- it feels incredible. He moves his head to accompany his motions, mouth open as he flicks the muscles on your clit, the perfect pressure to make you see stars. He moans against you, face buried in your pussy and his nose poking at your entrance, hands splayed on the underside of your asscheeks to help himself keeping you open for him. 

«My god- Jungkook»

«You like it?» he groans against your core, gathering your wetness on his tongue. It’s so sweet, so addicting.

«Fuck, yes» you nod.

«I love it,» he moves back on your clit, moans on it with his mouth full of your juices, too in love with your little pearl and how good it can make you feel «it’s perfect»

And he’s back at licking it again with the tip of his tongue, focused on the spot you like the most and then from time to time putting pressure with more of the muscle, setting on fire every nerve of the zone. You hold your breath, your chest is swelling in pleasure and your legs are already trembling. 

«Wanna do something» his lips brush on your pussy as he speaks, he doesn’t even dare to part from it.

«What?» you don’t know if you can take whatever it is that it’s running through his mind.

«Not yet,» he kisses your clit, making you whine for him «just relax for now»

«Shit, how am I supposed to- fucking hell, Jungkook» you moan out loud, his tongue sliding through your entrance feels so good. So wet and soft but firm, straight and pointed to push all your buttons right. 

«I love you» he can’t help himself. After all, he guesses that this is what you wanted him to do, show you how much he loves you even while he has his tongue deep inside your pussy.

«Love your pussy too, so much baby» he parts a little to take a look at the mess he’s reduced you to, dripping wet all over and glistening. A finger strokes your clit as he gets back to your hole, tongue sliding inside you so easily, he bobs his head up and down to fuck it inside you, his pace getting faster. You just keep your eyes shut, feeling the way his fingers dig into your flesh and his breath hits your skin every time he moves, the pleasure consuming. 

«Kook, I think I’m- going to cum» it’s already approaching you, it’s been since the moment his tongue poked at your clit and you don’t know how much you will be able to hold yourself back. Your body feels oversensitive, every touch and lick makes your nerves jump.

«You can,» he breathes against you, your legs tightening «wanna make you cum again afterwards» 

Fuck, it’s too much. His words are too much, so fucking hot. 

«Oh- god» you whine and Jungkook loves it. He loves it so much, he loves you so much. To have you like this makes him yearn for more and more, he wants it all. He wants you to give yourself to him and let him take care of you in the sweetest and sexiest way possible, fuck you rough and tell you how much he loves you at the same time, make love to you in every possible way. 

«You don’t know- shit, I don’t think you know the hold you have on me» he groans, speaks as he thrusts inside you, his words are muffled as the sound of your wetness takes over the bathroom. His finger works on your clit and you know that you’re too close to resist more.

«Tell me» you don’t even know what it is that makes you speak, your mouth moves on its own. Jungkook circles his tongue inside you, he curls it just a bit more and you squeeze your eyes as his moan in your pussy echoes in the bathroom. Fuck, you love it so much, so freaking much.

He slides the muscle out while sucking at the entrance of your hole, drinking your juices and growling against you in the sexiest way possible. Two of his fingers enter you, filling you up and replacing his tongue they fuck you so good that you don’t even know how to breathe anymore.

«You make me desperate,» he hisses, rubbing his digit on your clit and adding a bit more pressure «in every way possible. Want you every fucking day, every second cause I’m addicted. Sexually or not, baby»

«Koo, I…»

«I know,» he kisses your skin «cum for me»

«No- I- I love you» your voice breaks, too weary. Jungkook’s heart throbs in his chest, he wishes he could see your features now but to make you turn now would be too mischievous, so he just focuses on making you cum. His lips kiss your back, he raises himself up while he still moves inside you, leaving a path of wet kisses on every inch of skin he manages to reach.

«I love you too, angel» 

He nuzzles his nose on your back, the gesture totally far away from his next words: «Soak my fingers, wanna lick your juices»

Fuck, the room spins, you feel like levitating. Your high hits you so hard that you don’t feel your legs anymore, they tremble and you shiver and Jungkook parts his finger from your clit to wrap his arm around your front, digits digging in your flesh to keep you balanced as he still fucks into you to prolong your orgasm. He kisses your back, breathes you in, loves you more than a second ago if it’s even possible.

The feelings in your chest are long lasting, more than your climax. They fill you up even more when you come down and you notice his uneven breath against you as he holds you steady, safe from anything else that isn’t him. Jungkook kisses your skin endlessly, writes love with his lips until you’re even more drenched than you were under the jet, so much that you feel it deep inside every single bone of your body.

«Come here» he coos, looking up at you even when you still have your head against the marble. You breathe in, turn around to face him. Knees still on the floor, hair wet and lips glistening with your juices, a bit of them on his nose, eyes sweet and starry just like always. You want to laugh because how the hell are you supposed to sit on the floor of the shower when there’s him already, but the way he’s looking at you makes it hard to breathe and a second later you’re kneeling down and trying your best to sit, however his hand on your hips pushes you slightly to make you turn again. Jungkook opens his legs and bends them at your sides to save just a bit more space, you sit in front of him  and he guides your back on his chest. His cock pushes against your skin but the touch of his fingers on your cheek make your attention shift to his face, close and so beautiful it looks unreal. 

His lips connect with yours, soft and pillowy, and your mind fills up with a pinkish haze that seems to escape just to surround you with intimacy and coziness, his arm coming around you to feel just a bit more of your skin.

«What was it that you wanted to do?» you mumble against him, keeping your face turned to face him. Jungkook clicks his tongue, smiling with mischief.

«Later,» he pecks you again «if you want to»

«I want to,» you huff faking annoyance «I told you to fuck me but-»

«Aish, so greedy. Can’t I spoil you a little?» he shakes his head, bringing the fingers of the arm that’s wrapped around you in front of his face. They’re still wet with your juices, you expect him to lick them but what he does makes your breath stop and your pussy starts throbbing again. They stroke your lips and his eyes stay focused on his motions as he makes them glisten like a lipgloss, a cheeky smile taking over his features when he notices the way you’re looking at him.

«Wanna taste them from your lips» he murmurs. You let out a staggered breath, totally lost in him and the way he makes your mind go blank. Jungkook kisses you again, pecks your lips more than once, licks the bottom one to get every drop of your sweetness. You hate him for being like this because your pussy is soaked again and you don’t even know why the hell you find it so hot but it’s just- Jungkook. And fuck, he makes you weak. 

«I think I want to find out that thing» you breathe when he parts, his giggles resonate in the room as he cages you with his other arm too, stroking your stomach as you let your head fall on his shoulder. 

«Please?»

He taps his fingers on your navel, kissing your cheek.

«Aish, so cute,» he giggles happily «you’re exactly my type, you know that?»

«What does that even mean?» you laugh at his childish tone, shaking your head as you watch him munch on his lips.

«You have a type?»

«What? You! You’re-» he points his forefinger on your chest «you are»

«Why?» you coo teasingly, grabbing his finger in your hold and pushing his other arm down at your side. Jungkook watches you get up, turning around to look down at him. The view makes him gulp, his heart flutters at your beauty when you reach your hand out to him to make him stand. He takes it just for the sake of holding it, getting up on his own by pushing on the ball of his feet and his hand on the floor. When he towers over you his eyes are shining again and his bunny teeth on display as he beams brightly.

«Cause I love you,» he murmurs «you-» he snorts through his mouth, pushing the air out and making a nasal noise just like you would do when describing the sound of something exploding «ah, forget it»

You’re coming out of the shower, pushing the door open and he stands there totally entranced. If you didn’t know better, you’d think he was probably just enjoying the view. But Jungkook is… totally lost. When you face him you know it well, that look in his eyes. 

«I want to know» you push your words, getting closer to where he stands but without going in again. 

«I don’t have a type, I guess» he scrunches his nose, it makes you want to laugh, totally meaningless «cause you’re- you are the type. Like- aish, what am I even saying?»

Your laughter fills up his ears and your arms wrap around his torso, you let your head fall on his chest. His fingers come to stroke your hair, eyes half lidded as he giggles in that sweet way that makes your stomach twist and turn.

«I’m the type» you laugh.

«Don’t make fun of me, it’s just- you know what I mean. It’s not about just one thing, it’s like- everything»

«Okay, baby,» you shake your head «now come out» 

You grab two towels each, wrapping yourself up and your hair too, Jungkook does the same with his towel but just rubs his hair with the other one. 

«Do you remember when we went to Disneyland?» he suddenly stops his motions, leaving the wet cloth on the sink as you wear your slippers. You nod at him through the reflection of the mirror, Jungkook clicking his tongue on the roof of his mouth.

«Wanna go again»

«So suddenly?» you smile. 

He nods: «Can we go another time?»

«Next weekend?» you raise your eyebrows at him, thrilled by the thought. Jungkook’s mouth opens wide, stuck in place as he watches you point at his slippers. 

«What- next weekend?» he echoes, the shadow of a smile taking over his feature as he does as he’s told. You grab his hand and walk towards the door. 

«Hhm, we could? If you want to»

Disneyland sounds beautiful, indeed. You visited three years ago, spent three days laughing like two idiots and going on rollercoasters. You guess it couldn’t hurt at all to visit again. Jungkook feels drunk from the feeling already, having you all to himself for a weekend in a way that he never thought was possible years ago.

«Let’s go next weekend»

He stops in place, eyes wide and lips open.

«Really?»

«Why not?» you shrug.

«Are we getting the tickets now?»

«We’re really going?» he’s beaming so bright that the sun seems like a distant glow in comparison.

«Yes, we’re going. We could leave on Friday night?» you nod.

«Why- you’re sure? I was afraid to ask, I thought you’d say no» he’s totally surprised. Your hand pulls him as you start walking again towards his bedroom, Jungkook watches your eyebrows raise in question when you end your walk in front of his bed. 

«Why?» 

«I- thought you wouldn’t feel comfortable with it yet- since-»

«I told you,» you smile sweetly at him «I don’t want to restrain myself anymore. There’s no point in it, we know what we have, it’s not too soon cause I already-» you scoff, «I love you. And… I want to go» 

His expression makes your heart pound louder. Cheeks full, dark doe, big eyes glittery with thrill and love, pinkish lips open in a smile and bunny teeth showing, totally thrilled.

«Woah, this-» he bounces a little in place, totally excited «we need to get the tickets» 

«You wanna buy them now?» you giggle at his cuteness, pecking his cheek. Jungkook shakes his head, wraps his arms around you.

«Do you want to buy them now?» he gives you smooches on your forehead. You let one of your hands wrap around his neck and the other one lock around him, just under his shoulder your fingers tickle his skin as you look up at him.

«Later,» your hum has mischief in it «now I want what I asked for earlier» 

«What was it?» god, how he likes to tease you, and the way he licks his lips with a smirk that only makes you churn.

«You know what it was» you huff. Jungkook shakes his head slowly.

«Say it?» he breathes low against you.

«Wanna hear you ask for it» 

«Want you to fuck me,» you let all your inhibitions fall to the ground «rough and sweet at the same time»

«Fuck, get on the bed» his cock is already throbbing and twitching against the cloth, too hard and too weary to hold back from before and hearing your pleads just made it hungrier. 

«You make me lose it,» he watches you as you let your wet hair fall over your shoulders, the towel gets thrown on the floor and a second later you’re naked and sitting on the edge and his mind doesn’t function when you look at him like this «you want it rough? Want me to fuck you while a sweet talk you? Is that what you want?»

Shit, holy shit, yes. Totally. You can’t even answer him, too entranced by the view of him taking the fabric off and letting it fall on the ground, his eyes burning with fire and ready to devour you. 

«Lay down,» he wraps a hand around his shaft, pumping it a few times and making your pussy pulsate around nothing «slide back, get comfortable on the pillows»

You do as he says, body running only with the thrill in your veins. Your eyes lower back on his cock, red and hard, standing eager on his stomach it makes you salivate and wish to wrap your lips around it but Jungkook doesn’t have the same thought in mind. He knees on the bed, looks at your face.

«Open your legs,» he orders, tone firm «open your fucking legs» 

You don’t know if you’re ready for what’s to come. Your thighs open, feet digging into the soft mattress, his eyes ravenous. He licks his lips and strokes the head of his cock with his thumb, lets out a low groan; «That’s it»

You don’t even have time to realise what he’s doing, because a second later he’s already laying down and sucking on your clit and your eyes roll back in your head for how good it feels. The sound of him stroking his cock sends you spiralling, his soft mouth sucking and wrapping around your pearl sends every nerve on fire. 

«Fucking good pussy,» he breathes letting go of your clit, licking a strap over it «wanna make it squirt»

«Fuck, Jungkook» his words are pure sin, and your body wants it all.

«You like that? Like hearing that?» he kisses the bead so softly that you feel your breath getting stuck.

«I love her so much,» he sucks it again, hard and totally merciless «wanna make her cum so hard, baby. Want you to feel so good» his voice is muffled, he speaks when he lets go of you but doesn’t part enough for your clit not to perceive the brush of his lips as pleasure.

He lets go of his cock to push his finger inside you, filling you up and making you squirm on the bed. Jungkook clicks his tongue and kisses your clit again.

«Can she do that?» he arches his finger inside you, hitting your g-spot perfectly as he flicks his tongue over your clit. The pace is fast, it makes your pussy throb with sensitivity and your juices drip out of your hole, his knuckles are totally wet with them. Jungkook’s cock is throbbing, twitching in desperation, precum leaking out in need.

«Can you do that for me, love?» the last word makes your insides burn, his eyes travelling to your face just in time to see your lips open in a silent moan.

«Don’t- know» you let out, fisting the sheets. Jungkook blows on your clit and he feels your walls contract around his finger, so fucking soft and tight that he wants to bury his cock inside you and never come out. 

He pushes a second finger in, fucking inside you and watching your expression totally lost as he sucks your clit again, his lips tight around it. He moans on it, watches your thighs tremble at his sides and lets go again, consuming you and your mind, taking over totally. The way he clicks the underside of his tongue on your pearl makes you moan loud and he licks all the way down from it to your core, opens his lips as much as he can to take every part of you in his mouth, his teeth lightly brush against you and your hips raise involuntarily on the bed, pushing against his face. He moans on you, balls hard and cock oversensitive even with the smallest change of air, slurps at your juices as he sucks them through your entrance and lingers in the sweetness of them, so fucking saccharine and creamy. He wants you to explode, let go. 

«Never enough,» he licks back up from your pussy to your clit, flicking his tongue on the spot that makes you lose your mind, fingers pushing buttons inside of you that make your vision blurry «love you so much baby, push your pussy on my face» 

«Koo, I…»

«Push it all over me,» he growls on your clit, curls his fingers inside you «want your juices all over me, I love them so much»

You don’t hold yourself back anymore, do as he says. Your hips push up again, your hand goes to his hair and Jungkook sucks your clit again and again and again and you think you’re about to break cause it’s too fucking much. 

«Wanna make you cum» he moans as he dives as deep as he can into you, both with his fingers and with his tongue on your clit. The pressure added makes your head dig in the pillow, a breathy moan escaping your lips.

«Again and again, and again. Until you can’t take anymore cause it’s too much. Wanna fuck you and tell you how fucking much I love you and see you cum all over my fucking cock. Shit, you make me desperate»   

It’s sudden and it tears you apart and it stings a little but feels so fucking good that your body shakes and you don’t breathe anymore, because he bites your clit just enough and you can’t help it. You tremble and shiver, eyes shut and lips wide open, your hair wetting the pillow and your mind blank as the pleasure becomes too much and you let go. Jungkook licks your juices, slurps on them, dries your pussy of every drop, gulps them down as if it was the sweetest syrup in the world, his eyes on your face admiring how fucking beautiful you are when you cum, all for him and him only. His tongue on you feels so soft, his lips kiss and brush against every inch of your center and Jungkook can’t help but push the tip of his wet muscle inside you, making you shiver.

«Koo» you whine. He smiles against you, pushing it deeper and you writhe on the bed, too sensitive and overwhelmed. His fingers push on your hips, keeping you in place and against his lips.

«Is she sensitive?» he pecks your inner thigh, looking up at you. You nod out of breath, eyes locking with his.

«Wanna make you cum again,» he huffs «can she take it for me?»

«Jungkook, I- sensitive» you whine as he pecks your mound, lowering on your clit with a lick of his tongue on your skin. He blows on it, watching you squirm once more and whine.

«Poor baby» he kisses the pearl decadently.

«Oh, fuck» your hand fists his hair, tugging at the roots, Jungkook kisses it again, he opens his mouth slightly and lets the inner wet part of his lower lip add pressure as he slowly moves up to slide his lips on you. 

«You like it when I kiss your clit?» his hand travels up to your abdomen, it passes your hips and your tummy, fingers sprayed as he grasps your left breast and squeezes it slightly.

You nod at him, your pussy is pulsating and it’s so wet and sensitive that you can’t speak properly. He kisses it again, loud and sultry, again and again and again until you lose count and your walls are crumping up again, the pleasure too much to handle. 

«Look at me,» he coos tenderly «let me see your pretty face»

You open your eyes, look down at him from the pillow that it’s soaked with the water in your hair. Jungkook’s thumb strokes your nipple, slow and gentle it makes your leg open for him even more and he has to hold back from reaching down to stroke his cock again. 

«Can you cum again for me, baby? Wanna give you so much more,» he flicks his tongue over your clit, making you hiss «wanna fuck you so good, want you to feel me for the whole day tomorrow»

His words make your pussy clench around nothing and all you can do is let go and feel the pleasure build up, picturing his cock inside you and thrilled to have him fuck you in the same way he’s been doing with his lips. The thought is too alluring and when he kisses your clit again your mind goes blank and all you can feel it’s your pearl pulsating desperate and his slurpy kisses sending you in a haze. They’re endless, Jungkook kisses your pussy and your legs are trembling again, weary and too sensitive to last any longer. You moan silently, dig your head in the pillows, feel his lips all over you even as you cum again. His hand caresses your tummy, providing comfort as your body goes limp on the bed, lips pecking your inner thighs and your mound, your knees, your tummy, his hand locking around yours. The way you look, shit, it’s ethereal. He doesn’t think he ever witnessed such a beautiful masterpiece, you should be worshipped and represented in every frame, hung in museums, have buildings built with your name. There has to be somewhere, a distant, alternative universe maybe, where you’re a princess of a flourishing land or the goddess of the universe, there has to be. 

«I love you so much,» he’s helpless, eyes fixated on you «I wanna keep you in my pocket and cuddle you every night. Wanna shelter you from the world»

«Come here, please» you squeeze his hand,  Jungkook lays down on you without having you to ask twice. His cock is rock hard, poking at your tummy and leaking precum from the tip but he’s so fucking in love with you that all he can do is snuggle his face in the crook of your neck and wrap one of his arms around you, the other helping him up not to weight down on you.

«I think you broke me» you groan tired, eyes shut as you feel him giggle and hide more into you.

«You asked for it» he mumbles.

«I didn’t ask for three orgasms» you scoff at him, arms wrapping around him. His chest is firm against you, his back broad and your fingers can’t help but wander and caress it up and down, he shivers on top of you.

«You- you’re so annoying» he groans.

«Aish, here we go again,» you laugh at him, stroking his wet hair with your other hand

«thank you for making me cum three times» you kiss his neck. Jungkook smiles against you, he closes his eyes and takes in your sweet scent.

«That’s better,» he kisses your skin «was it too much? Maybe I shouldn’t ha-»

«I loved it,» you shake your head eagerly, slightly tugging at the strands to make him look at you «every single one of it»

He scrunches his nose, a bright beam taking over his face.

«I’m just teasing you,» you stroke his back «I love when you make me cum with your lips» it comes out low and almost like a whisper and he can see your cheeks reddening, but his heart flutters and all he wants to do is kiss you until the world explodes.

«Yeah?» he coos sweetly, hushed and airy. You nod, eyes lowering on his lips.

«Yes,» you smile «that thing you did- when you bit me…»

He licks his lips and boops his nose to yours. 

«Did it feel good?» he asks under his breath. The way he checks in with you every time makes you feel so cherished and it’s like he’s embracing you in a tight warm blanket, totally safe and cared for.

«A lot,» you nod «felt so good, love»

«I wanted to try that» his lips brush against yours when he speaks. You smile at him, pushing your face up just enough to make your lips lock together, his moan is sweet as your tongue enters his mouth. His fingers caress your hip, your shoulder, his hand cups your head as you lay back down and he lowers himself to keep contact, your soft petals and the way you give yourself to him makes his chest swell with happiness and vulnerability every time, how you smile against him, kiss him some more. His cock twitches and you giggle under his lips, Jungkook pecking your lower one with all the love he has inside him.

«Wanna make you cum» you whisper when he parts a little, lashes fluttering at the sound of your voice.

«Wanna cum inside you,» he lets out, hand cupping your cheek «but I can just-»

«I want you inside me,» you cut him off, already knowing where his brain is taking him «don’t care if I’m sensitive. Wanna feel you»

He munches on his lips, cheeks a little swollen as he mulls it over: «Are you sure?»

«I’m sure, Koo. Please, fuck me?» you huff looking up at him, his eyebrows raise at your unceremonious words. You peck his lips and lift your hips up knowing well that he’s still not sure about it. His cock jerks and Jungkook lets out a strangled moan, closing his eyes shut. 

«Fuck, can’t say no when you tease me like this» he breathes through his mouth. You grin, his eyes open to look straight down at you.

«Good, cause I’ve waited quite a while» you tease. He scoffs on your face, his hand moves away from your skin just so he can slap your thigh but it only makes you grin more.

«Open your legs» he smiles at your attitude, shaking his head slightly in disdain but his pupils are sparkling and he’s so cute right now that you want to kiss him dumb. However, you do as he says, your movements are quick and your pussy is still throbbing from your last orgasm. 

Jungkook parts just a little, he grabs the length of his cock and strokes it once or twice, it cuts your breath off just to look down at his motions; his big and slender hand, beautiful fingers, the girth of his cock and the precum leaking from its head, red and needy.

«I wanna try something sometime» you let out totally entranced, he guides his cock to your pussy, sliding it into your folds. The sensation makes him bite on his lips with his eyes squeezed shut, a needy whine escaping his lips. 

«Ngh- what?» he looks down at you.

«Gonna tell you when you’re inside me» you tease him, making him scoff. He lifts his hips slightly, takes his cock away from your lips. 

«You’re such a brat» his hand lays on you clit, slapping it just enough to make you moan out loud. Your eyes widen in shock, he grins and kisses your cheek and you don’t know if you should be dripping with arousal or dig a hole into the ground and giggle for his cuteness and the way he makes you heart flutter with just a loving peck. 

Jungkook lowers himself back again, he wraps his hand around his shaft to guide it back to where it was and slides it between your folds, it’s so wet that the underside of his cock is soaked with your juices and all he wants to do is feel them on his tongue again. Your clit is oversensitive and the weight of his cock on you only makes it worse, your hand is already gripping the sheets.

He slides his length up and down as he admires the way your eyelashes flutter and the red shade of your lips, your pretty nose, the shape of your eyes. He loves you so much, so freaking much it’s hard to handle it, it’s thought to even just breathe through it. 

«Love, look at me?» he coos. Just a word and you’re melting in a puddle, breath staggered. He’s so beautiful, so ethereal. He slides his cock down to your entrance, pokes at it with the head. 

«I love you» you whisper. Jungkook smiles, his cock pushes inside you and even though he halts his hips to get you used to the feeling your hands come down on his ass and you push him deeper, making him groan under his breath and close his eyes at the feeling. Tight, close, so fucking wet that his cock is already soaked, so soft. His lips are open, eyebrows furrowed and you don’t know if you want him to go rough on you anymore cause your arms are dying to feel him close and your heart is pounding and throbbing for his love and his affection. He’s so beautiful, so beautiful it tears you apart in the most saccharine way, you love him so much. 

«Say it back, please» you breathe. 

Jungkook lays his head on your chest, the movement is slow and his breath is staggered, he looks up at you. Some strands of his hair come in the way of his eyes, a drop of water dripping down from one of them and caressing his cheekbone as it travels down. Your eyes are sparkling, lost in a haze, lips open just slightly.

«I love you,» he kisses your clavicle «I’m- don’t even know if that’s enough cause- it doesn’t hold half of the meaning of what I feel for you» his nose brushes against your neck as he hovers over you.

«But I love you, so much. So freaking much, baby»

«Please, move» you breath low.

«Wanna feel you» 

«Like this?» he brings his hips back, his cock slides against your walls perfectly, it rubs over every nerve, and then he pushes back in, slow and maddening he stretches you out in the best way possible as your legs move around his hips to cage him into you, his low moan resonating in your ear. 

«Shit, yes» you nod. Jungkook kisses your neck, his hand reaches yours and locks around it, thumb caressing the back as he pulls back out just to hit your spot again. 

«You’re perfect,» he licks his lips looking down at you «so perfect. Tell me you’re mine»

«I’m yours,» the way he groans at your words makes your pussy clench around him and he throws his head down on your chest at the sensation «only yours, all yours»

«Fuck, say it again» he rests there with his hand pushing yours down on the bed as he moves inside you, his pace fastening.

«Yours, Jungkook. All- every part of me» you moan. He feels so good, so perfect. His cock makes you helpless, he makes you helpless. Just a look, a blink of his eyes and you would do the worst, the absolute worst for him even though you know that he would never ask. You can’t help it, you’re so fucking in love with him that you can’t see straight and the world finally makes sense cause he’s in it and all over you. 

«Fuck, yes,» he kisses your chest, hovers over your face again «want a whole life with you»

God, your heart is bursting. He makes you want to stay all day in his arms and only live by his warmth, look at the stars in the sky just to compare them to the ones sparkling in his dark eyes. 

«Please, yes» you whine as he hits your g-spot, eyes deep in his «want you every day, Kook. Wanna wake up to your face every fucking day»

«Yeah?» he’s losing his mind, and you can see it clearly. Trying to hold himself back, licking his lips as he stares down at yours and your eyes, fucking himself so deep into you that it’s driving him insane. The sounds that come from your wetness make your cheeks red, all the orgasms you had before and still you’re still hungry for more, for him.

«Yes» you nod eager. He moans out loud, you feel his cock throb inside you and leak precum that mixes with your juices. It’s absolute filth but it feels so intimate that it makes your head spin and your heart clench. 

«Can do that,» he kisses your lips «I absolutely can do that. Please don’t change your mind» he sounds like begging and you can’t help but wrap tighter around him.

«Not gonna» you huff. The moment he smiles at you, shit you know you can’t go back anymore. It feels so good, so sweet but so consuming and he’s yours, his smile is. The way his eyes sparkle when he looks at you, the sound of his breath too overwhelmed by you, his hand  squeezing yours, all yours. 

Jungkook can’t get used to this, he doesn’t think he ever could. Every time he makes love to you, every time you give yourself to him his body lights up, his soul grows a size more just to get as much of you as it can. Seeing you under him in his bed, with your hair wetting the sheets, your body naked for him, your vulnerability in his hands that promise to worship every inch of it and comfort it with everything he can, your cheeks red, lips swollen, eyes starry and almost shut for the pleasure he’s making you feel… he knows he will never get used to this. Not even in another life, at the last one of them all.

«Wish I could take a picture of you right now,» he fans over your lips «so pretty. So beautiful, I love it. Love you, love your pussy, love how you give yourself to me»

«Shit, feels so good» your hands cups his head, bringing him for a sloppy kiss, passionate and lost as his hips keep meeting yours. Jungkook doesn’t know how long he will be able to hold himself back, cause his cock is twitching and his balls are already tight. He was having a hard time even when he was making you cum, every time felt like a torture to his throbbing and heavy dick on his stomach.

«Shit, baby I’m sorry- I don’t know if I can give you what you want- nngh, it feels too good to have you like this» he whines in your ear, kisses your neck endlessly. His hand leaves yours to cup your breast, fingers sprayed and digging into your skin, your pussy clenching. The thought seems far away now, you can’t let go of having him like this, ruining you slowly.

«It’s okay, like this is perfect» you puff out a breath, Jungkook pushes a little harder inside you and suddenly your body is on the edge, eyes squeezed shut. 

«You’re going to cum?» he hides himself deeper into you, keeps hitting your spot faster but doesn’t dare to pull out cause seeing you like this sends his mind in a haze. For god’s sake, he’d spend all night long like this. Making you cum undone, over and over again until you soak his sheets with your juices and your lips are so swollen that they hurt. His cock rubs against you perfectly, hips moving faster and faster as his groans fill the room, he just pulls himself back enough to meet your spot again without losing it, giving your sensitive pussy what she’s been begging for by engulfing his length so deliciously.

«Gonna cum» you nod. Jungkook bites his lips, teeth digging into the red flash, pupils fixated on your face as you let out a moan.

«Love watching you cum,» his hand strokes your cheek «let go, love. Do it for me, baby»

Your mind goes blank once more, your lungs are on fire as you try to breathe properly but can’t, pussy pulsating desperately and extremely sensitive. He pecks your lips and shit, the gesture has your heart clenching and it makes you cry out loud because it’s too much freaking pleasure and sweetness and you just- it overwhelms you. Totally and wholly, your legs shake in spasms, you hear Jungkook swear and moan but it’s too far away and your ears are not working well, you can’t feel your body anymore, it’s like you don’t have control over it. Jungkook watches you entranced, he digs his head in the crook of your neck and stops his motions even though he was about to cum just to hold your shaking body and provide comfort with his hold, kisses every inch of skin he finds. Your breath in his ear is heavy, your eyes closed and lips apart, and he feels himself growing desperate, not to cum but to reassure you in the gentlest way possible and provide comfort to every part of you. He kisses your cheek more than a few times  loudly and silently, lays his forehead against yours and pecks the tip on your nose, snuggles against it with his, he keeps his arms wrapped around you and his cock still buried in your pulsating core.

«Fuck- Jungkook» you let out a low whine with your eyes closed. Jungkook giggles and lays a smooch on your cheek again.

«You- you don’t know how fucking sexy that was» you open your eyes, your vision is a little blurry.

«I- you made me cum so hard» you hug him back but feel him still rock hard inside you and filling you up totally.

«You… why did you stop? You didn’t cum»

He raises his eyebrows and pecks your temple. His thumb strokes your cheek: «Didn’t wanna overstimulate you more,» he squeezes you tighter «you squirted all over me»

«I- what?» your eyes widen as your lips hang down. Jungkook smiles and nods looking down at you.

«Did you ever do that?» he coos gentle, voice low almost like a whisper. 

You shake your head: «Never, are you sure I- really?»

He giggles at your tone, parts by pushing on his arms with his length still inside you. The whole expanse of his abdomen gets shown, muscles rippling and his brownish nipples standing, the v line that guide to his cock… wet.

«Oh, fuck,» you pull him down by pushing him from behind his back «I didn’t think I could do that. Shit, it’s so embarrassing but-»

«It was sexy as hell, baby,» he shakes his head to make your brain stop overthinking it «just to think about it makes- thinking that you felt so good that you couldn’t hold it back- ngh, makes me wanna make you do it again» 

«Don’t get used to it,» you huff on his lips, shaking your head but smiling shyly «it never happened» 

He pecks your lips.

«I promise I won’t,» he beams «how do you feel?»

The smile that takes over your features makes his heart throb. You couldn’t wrap your head around it if you knew how much he loves you. Asking you how you’re feeling after making you cum so hard when he’s still rock hard and needy inside you, just this makes your chest hurt.

«Good, baby. I feel good,» you bring your hand on his face to caress his cheek and travel your finger on his temple, they push a strand of hair away from his sight «wanna make you cum» you squeeze your walls around him even though you’re still pulsating and too sensitive. Jungkook whines at your ways, let’s his head fall into your neck again.

«Baby- don’t. Shit- feels so good. Don’t wanna- hurt you» he whimpers when you do it again, his eyes are shut and his cock is twitching but it’s caged in your tight hold and it makes him crazy.

«Please, wanna feel you cum,» you kiss the soft skin of his neck, warm and fair, leave your lips on it as you speak «please, love»

«Baby, for real I-» his voice trembles as he tries to restrain himself.

«Please,» you pout even though he can’t see you, you move your hand slowly down his back until you find his asscheek «cum for me? Want you to paint my pussy with your cum» 

God, he can’t think straight when you whisper filth like this in his ear and make it sound like the sweet prayer of an angel, honey coated.

You squeeze his asscheek slightly, push your hand down on his flash to make him sink deeper into you, your juices wet and soaking his balls. 

«Fuck, tell me if it hurts» he whines knowing well that you won’t give up. His arm pulls you to him more until your hard nipples are tight against his chest and his cock throbbing inside you. He pulls out slowly, driving himself crazy with the sounds of your pussy and how good you engulf him, dives deep inside you at the same pace. His cockhead is oversensitive, when it touches your walls it leaks so much precum that you bite your lips and Jungkook moans loud and breathy, tight to you. He open his lips on your skin, breathes in your sweet scent and kisses your flash endlessly as he pulls back his hips again just to push back inside slowly. 

«So wet,» he whimpers «so freaking wet, baby. Drives me insane» 

«Wanna see your face when you cum,» you tug at the roots of his hair a bit and Jungkook’s hand reaches yours as he raises his head to look at you, bringing it on the bed and interlocking his fingers «love when you cum for me»

He’s desperate, out of breath, whiny, high pitched as he fucks himself slowly into your heaven, so freaking juicy and wet that he’s afraid he’d slip out if his strokes were any longer or faster. The thought pushes him closer, having your pussy so wet for him and your arms all around him, your face looking at him as he hovers over you, features ethereal and full of love and admiration for his pleasure, whispers in his ear.

«Love you,» when you peck his nose he whines even more «love you so much. Can’t get enough of you»

«My- baby,» his breath is staggered «you’re- my baby»

Your hands make him crazy, they brush against his back and help him fuck himself into you by pushing on his ass, caress his hair, dig into the muscles of his shoulders, write stories on his skin that you didn’t live together yet. Jungkook feels overwhelmed, totally defeated. You bring him close to you, kiss him sloppy and dumb and make him the happiest man alive and suddenly, he’s whimpering and moaning and his movements come to an halt. 

«Fucking- fuck, shit» he cries into your mouth with his eyes closed and squeezed, eyebrows furrowed, voice not even able to speak properly. His cum bursts inside you, it paints your walls and fills you up totally, hot and wet it mixes with your juices and your pussy clenches around him at the feeling, a breathy whimper coming out of his lips. 

«Can’t- can’t take so much love» he crashes in the space between your head and your shoulder. His body is trembling and his cock throbs inside you. Your breath gets cut as you wrap him up in the best way that you can. You stroke his hair with your fingers, your legs cage him into you again, one of your arms keeps his chest close to yours, so tight that you feel his heart pound and your lips kiss every inch of skin that you manage to reach. 

Jungkook lays there with his mind blank and his heart bursting, hiding himself in his safe place in your neck and trying to steady his breath. 

«Did- did it hurt?» he gulps as he speaks, voice weary and frail. You kiss his earlobe, play with the strands of his hair.

«It didn’t,» you hum «don’t worry about it»

«I’m sorry baby, I- it was too much, couldn’t do what you wanted»

«Changed my mind when we started,» you chuckle as he turns his head, your side profile makes him want to caress your nose with his finger «we can do that another time»

He hums a little, a sweet kiss on your neck.

«I promise it’s gonna be good,» he nods «you make love to me so sweet. Tears me apart» his voice is a bit high pitched, but it comes out as a whisper, so vulnerable. 

You flash a smile, moving slightly under him. Jungkook takes a deep breath and pushes on his arms to kiss your lips and then look down between you. His cock is still inside you and he snuggles himself into your skin as he grabs the base of it, the sensitivity of his length makes him moan as he slides it out of you, drenched in both of your cum and his and still half hard. You pat the bed beside you, turn on your side as he lays down. 

«Closer,» you pout «closer baby»

He fights with the sheets making you giggle as he gets closer, until he lays his head down on the pillow just an inch away from you, body so close you feel the heat radiating from his skin as his arm comes around you and pushes you to him, chest tight. He brushes your back with his fingertips and you shiver when they stroke up your spine, slow and ticklish until they reach the back of your neck and he cups your cheek. 

«Do you want to go for real?» he asks low. You nod your head, a little smile on your lips.

«Wanna go,» you push a strand of humid hair out of his face «for real»

His smile makes your heart clench, that little nose scrunch that you love so much and his cheeks full, eyes full of stars.

«Aish, I’m so happy,» he stretches his leg over yours «we should get the tickets after we shower»

«Let’s do that,» you squeeze his cheek «let’s go shower?»

«Just a little,» he whines and pushes himself tighter against your body «let’s wait a little? Love cuddling after we make love» 

Shit, you can’t help it. You love him so much, he squeezes your heart in his hand every time he looks at you, when he talks with his tone sugar coated, frail and totally helpless and shows himself begging for your love with his eyes, so vulnerable that you just fill full. You want to make him happy. Want to see him smile, giggle and titter, laugh out loud until he has tears in his eyes, colour his world of the same pink shade he paints yours in. You want to make him breathe and feel the same feeling you have in your chest, cause it’s too much to bare on your own and it makes you lose your mind to see him drunk in it. You want to have in wholly, every day and fill your time with memories and experiences, learn as much as you can, the little secrets that he told you and the ones you don’t know yet, find out about his pet peeves when he’ll be older and have arguments just to make up and hug each other so tight that something inside you either breaks and he’ll have to kiss its wound or fixes. Hold him so tight that he can’t breathe, shower him with love and hug him tight when you both cry cause you love each other too much, kiss his insecurities away and give him a shielded place to hide himself in and to heal, cause you will always have your arms empty for him, whenever he needs a safe space you will be here, as you’ve always done with each other. You want him to remember this, and to sleep well, cause you will be here taking care of him just the same as he does with you.

«Love» he coos. You hum in question, a big beam on your face.

«You didn’t tell me»

«What?»

«What you wanted to try» he whispers, eyes big and full of curiosity. You scoff at him and shake your head.

«Next time, I’ll tell you» 

«I want to know,» he pouts «please, tell me?»

You sigh: «you’re still half hard, Koo»

«Don’t care, not in the mood for something freaky now, anyway» he mulls. You roll your eyes at him.

«Who told you it’s something freaky?» you slap his shoulder and Jungkook giggles.

«Then tell me,» he brushes his lips against yours «what is it?»

You cheeks colour of a red shade, his eyes look at them as he munches on his lips, his thumb caresses your cheek.

«Wanna watch while you touch yourself,» you whisper shyly «you don’t have to if-»

«Oh, shit-» he gulps down on his spit «could you do the same while I do that?»

Your eyes widen, you want to laugh for whatever is going on because you came four times and somehow your pussy is getting wet again, it’s ridiculous.

«I- if you want me to» you smile. Jungkook nods and nuzzles his face to you.

«Hell yes if I want that» he chirps. You chuckle at his excitement, hide your face into the pillow. His lips are so stretched that his cheeks hurt.

«Just, let’s take one step at a time,» he strokes your back «I don’t want you to feel pressured into anything. I want to do things right, in the right way for you» he goes to stroke your hair and you raise your face from the pillow.

«I don’t, I told you»

«I know,» he nods and kisses your lips softly, feather like «whenever you want to do anything, when it’s the right time for you, you know I’m always here» 

«I know,» your heart clenches «I love you»

He pushes his face closer to yours until he’s breathing over your lips and his brush on you as he speaks: «I love you too,» he smiles «loved you for so much, will love you always»

You you can read the first part here: Closer: Too Close

Read more about Closer here: Closer

Taglist: @p-i-e-d-p-i-p-e-r, @kaitlynlovesbm, @bytheinaya, @jub-jub, @taolucha, @mianyas1998, @seoulrenebae-blog, @ppeachyttae, @gluk97, @jk97bam, @diorh0seokie, @gwsjungkookie, @moonlikemeh, @skzthinker, @jungkookieeee97, @eysloveskoosomuch, @sleepy-sae, @jjkw-7, @singularityjes, @spookybirstarfish, @vvicadiction, @kimchijeonjk, @suciedad-divina, @katarinamae

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

This is totally cool, lol! That's why I tagged you, I like different perspectives 🥰 and I adore lesbian Jenny

I've been thinking a lot about Jenny's character and sexuality lately since I'm in the middle of rewatching the show. I totally agree that she's attracted to women and most times she pursues guys it's mainly to increase social status and not because of genuine interest. Nate always felt different to me, though. Like, the two times she really pursues him is in season 2, when she's being homeschooled and trying to make it as a designer, and the end of season 3, which is after the whole Damien drama and she's just looking for someone who cares about her and respects her (I know you said once that it doesn't even feel romantic here, which I also agree with, poor girl just needs a connection). I do really see how it can be interrupted as comphet, though. Like she feels like she's supposed to be attracted to Nate because who wouldn't be?

I think the reason why I lean the other way is probably just projection. Jenny's been my favourite GG character since I first watched the show when I was 12, partly because I relate a lot to her, and since I'm bisexual... Add that plus the fact that I totally have had a crush on Nate and of course I'm gonna ship them. I've been relating to Jenny even more this time around cause I dropped out of school this year, so her season 2 arc really hit close to me. So this made my jenate feelings come back tenfold and also made me that much madder at Rufus, lol. I just wanted to go through the screen and shake his shoulders like "There are other paths than the one you want your daughter to have, not everyone has to go through life like society expects you to let your daughter carve out her own unconventional path you fucking idiot!" Luckily my parents have been way more supportive.

Mainly I just see Jenny as bi with a strong lean towards women, but I like to think about lesbian Jenny, too. It wouldn't exactly be the first time I had contradicting headcanons.

I don't know I just think it's really cool that different people can have such different interpretations of the same character. I think that's what's so interesting about fiction, to see how we view things differently depending on how we view and relate to things based on our own experiences. Tumblr can be so focused on hating people who disagree with you, but I like following people with different opinions, it helps me understand people better.

Yeah, I'm glad you tagged me!! back in November, some anons were mean to me about shipping Jenate (me??? who literally does not even - anyway) and ever since then I've been trying extra to ensure that Jenate shippers feel welcome on my blog - you may already know this, because I've brought it up before, but I'm saying it here to let you know that every time you tag me in your Jenate edits I get so happy that you're sharing something you're so passionate about with me!! I'm also a big believer of like........ making the content you want to see (a big part of why I even learnt to gif is because nobody was giffing Dan & Nate, and I was like...... that's the content I need, so if it's not already existing, I'm gonna make it happen!) so regardless of my feelings it's always so cool to see the way you conceptualise JN + their feelings re: each other, and your choice of scenes + lyrics (??? I'm not actually familiar with where you got the words for your edits, they're likely songs I haven't heard, haha) is just so interesting & good!

OH my full Jenny & Nate feelings are a lot more complicated than just comphet on Jenny's part. I feel like..... neither of them was romantically/sexually into each other? and that is kind of the appeal to me? I've always interpreted Nate's interest in Jenny during the s2 arc as sort of like - everything in his life is so unstable and undetermined, and here is Jenny who is so clear on who she is and what she wants, and he admires and respects that, and he wants to be there for her and support her, so when she kisses him he just sort of lets her take their dynamic wherever she wants to? that is very much the vibe I got. You already know how I feel about lesbian Jenny, I mean, you quoted my meta right back at me :'))

but I DO agree with you that Nate is different from the other guys to Jenny. JN have this really specific kind of honesty to them - well, when Jenny wasn't spiralling and trying to get power and acting out, and when the writers actually cared? I still think that NJ had the potential to be a SOLID dynamic but the writers made it sorta unhealthy on the show :(( - but I've spoken abt moments like in seventeen candles and the empire strikes jack before, where they're both able to be emotionally vulnerable around each other in ways we don't see them be with anyone else. I've even compared that to what I like about Derena, whom everyone knows I ship in every possible way, haha. But there's something about characters who trust each other and allow themselves to be honest with each other in ways that they wouldn't otherwise EVER be - especially with characters like Jenny & Nate who have spent so long trying to seem fine and okay even when they're really not.

I honestly really like the idea of queerplatonic Jenate - they're life partners, they're each other's rock, they're each other's person - but it's not romantic OR sexual - and for Nate & Jenny, whose adolescence has involved navigating other people sexualising them so much + not having the best track record with romantic relationships - for them, I feel being qpps gets REALLY interesting, because you get all the perks of a relationship without the romantic/sexual obligations? (obligations isn't the best word, but i don't know what else to use here? LOL) and that's something i love to explore.

I feel like book Jenny was bi! The way she gushed about Nate, whom she canonically had a crush on, and the way she gushed about Serena were EXACTLY the same. Also YES I love multiple headcanons always, it's a lot of fun seeing people explore that!!! I know people who have aroace readings of Jenny, or aro lesbian / ace lesbian readings of her, and I find that really cool, too!

I also definitely get you about relating to Jenny a lot, and feeling that kind of connection. It's similar to how I feel about Dan, and .... explains a lot of my contradicting dair views, actually. A few years ago I had a seriously intense crush on a girl who was... a lot like Blair, in many ways. I spent a ridiculous amount of time writing poetry about her, etc etc, but I never actually acted on it. If she'd fabricated schemes that involved us kissing, though..... I don't know. I don't think I would've denied it if I'd felt like I actually had a chance. I think we just had a case of bad timing, & I like to think in another universe, maybe we were actually together for a bit. I'm glad that your parents are supportive of you and better than Rufus! <3

I think that's what's so interesting about fiction, to see how we view things differently depending on how we view and relate to things based on our own experiences <- THIS exactly! this is a big part of why that "proship" is in my bio. like this is exactly what it means to me and how I conceptualise & understand it!!! Like you, I also like engaging with people who have different understandings and opinions of the characters -> it definitely helps you make new friends you would otherwise not meet by staying in your bubble, & from a fandom point of view, it also helps you develop a more nuanced understanding of a character. Some of the best written Jenny Humphrey I've read was in Jenate fics - and I've had people who don't even ship Blenny tell me they liked the way I wrote Jenny in my post canon blennyfic, so... idk. it's loving Jenny hours - each and every single iteration of Jenny!!!

[lovethestars1966]

STEREK FBI/FALSELY ACCUSED FIC

Chapter three is up from unforgettable!! The one where the Sheriff arrests and charges Derek with multiple murders.  Also I have a competition going on the person who can guess the murderer first!! First and second prize. It’s to pay for some ART by a very talented Tumblr artist who we all know and love. Just a bit of fun. Give it a go if you're interested and who knows. Maybe you’ll be the winner. Can’t hurt.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31853854/chapters/79642657#workskin

Excerpt: (Big one today...)

“So you guys work with Stiles?” Isaac asked conversationally as he led Allison and Jackson along the track to where the body had been discovered.

“For a few years now,” Allison answered, assuming she would be the only helpful person for Isaac today. Jackson was forthcoming but anything he had to say seemed less than useful. “You knew him from school?” She asked.

“Yeah, but if you’re from Beacon Hills you pretty much know everyone from school.”

Jackson speaks up, “was he just as annoying back then?”

“Probably more.” Isaac laughs genuinely and it causes Allison to giggle alongside him. “Didn’t stop me from being madly in love with him though.” he admits sadly.

Allison isn’t afraid to admit she stumbled then. Freezing right alongside Jackson at the sudden bombshell Isaac had just dropped. Isaac himself didn’t notice he was walking alone for a few moments but when he did he looked back to find them both standing there gobsmacked.

“Guess Stiles doesn’t talk about me much huh?” he asked just a little bit embarrassed. Allison made a small choking noise while Jackson threw his hands skyward in disbelief.

“Seriously, how did that little weasel get two guys to fall in love with him?” He asked but Isaac skilfully ignored him in favour of Allison.

“Did he know?” She queried.

“Whole town knew.” the deputy answered, shrugging his shoulders and continuing towards their intended destination, “Although I would hope Stiles knew anyway since we dated.”

Allison had just started walking again.

“What the fuck is happening?” Jackson whispered, mostly to himself.

“Wait,” Allison threw a hand out to stop Isaac once more. “I thought Derek was the first and only person Stiles ever dated.” Isaac nodded and hurried them along once more.

“Well yes and no,” He relented to her enquiring eyebrow, “Derek was certainly the first person he dated and I assume he thinks he’ll be Stiles last. Stiles and myself dated for a few months when he and Derek broke up.”

“Stiles and Derek never broke up.” The conflicted agent to Isaac’s right argued which caused the young cop himself to huff quietly with laughter.

“Guess Stiles doesn’t talk about anything from his past much.” he states, “I gotta tell you, that does make me feel a bit better.”

“I’m starting to feel like none of us really know Stiles.” Allison muttered.

“Yeah, well I just learnt two people have actually seen Stiles naked and enjoyed it so now I’m questioning everything I know.” Jackson countered inciting another round of laughter from Isaac.

“Now that I can’t claim,” he admitted, “me and Stiles never had sex, though not from a lack of trying on my part.”

“Surprisingly that didn’t help.” Jackson grumbled and then wheezed out an annoyed breath after having a hand thrown across his chest. “Problem?”

“Not at all, we've just arrived.”

It was like flicking a switch. Allison and Jackson went from confused, and a little sickened in Jackson case, to professional in the blink of an eye. From the corner of her eye she saw Isaac looking mildly impressed.

“You got the file?” Jackson asked Allison who was already nose deep in said paperwork.

“Looks like she was found underneath that tree over there,” she pointed towards a large imposing trunk, and after a quick inspection they discovered specks of remaining blood confirming the assumption.

“wide space,” Jackson noted out loud, “no clear trails, lots of obstacles.”

“What does that mean?” Isaac asked genuinely interested.

“Means whoever did it has to be an experienced hiker.” Allison answered as Jackson wondered off a little. “Probably have an intimate knowledge of the area.”

“A local?”

“Not necessarily, could be anyone who travels here often enough to learn the terrain. Although statistically speaking a local is more likely.” She mumbled examining a photograph.

“Any tire tracks?” Jackson yelled, still out of view, startling the young deputy.

“None that our technicians could find.” He answered anyway as the male agent came stumbling back into the clearing.

“How wide were your search parameters?” he questioned further.

“Had a team of about six go about two miles in all directions.”

“Only two miles?” Allison asked shocked at the same time Jackson screwed up his face.

“Only six people?”

“We’re a small town,” Isaac huffed a little offended, “that’s actually a lot for us,”

Allison had the moral conscience to at least look sheepish while Jackson merely shook his head in judgement.

“Two miles is still pretty far to drag a body.” Isaac moved on smoothly. “At least it is for any normal  human being.”

“Well you’re not wrong there, Kolchak.” Jackson retorted unforgivingly. “Maybe she was flown here on a magic carpet.” Isaac was becoming increasingly more put out the longer Jackson was allowed to talk and showed so in the narrowing of his eyes.  Allison was going to have to watch that. Her best friends fiancé had a way of pissing people off that was unmatched by others.

“Obscure references to seventies si-fi-crime shows aside,” the deputy forged on, “the point still remains, this guy must be ripped… if it is a guy? Do we know that?” He directed the last part towards her.

“I highly doubt it’s a woman.” She responded, and Isaac looked extremely grateful. “the facts don't add up.”

“Meaning?”

“Statistics show that ninety two percent of all female serial killers know their victims personally. While it is extremely likely, almost definite even, that the unsub in this case knew at least one or two of their victims, considering the fact that they were spread across three states and share extremely similar aesthetics, knowing all thirteen on a personal level is virtually impossible.” Allison explained calmly only for Jackson to tag on the end.

“Pair that with the fact that most female motives are to do with money, and that we just ruled out magic carpet to the dumpsite, seems a bit ridiculous to suggest women doesn't it?” he asked with no small amount of mockery.

“Boy are you going to be sorry if it does turn out to be a woman.” Isaac replied shaking his head in judgment. Jackson’s only response was to roll his eyes.

“Okay,” Allison spoke up completely ignoring the boys little competition, “So if he didn’t drive here, and he didn’t carry her here then how did she get here?” she pondered aloud. Jackson furrowed his own forehead in concentration.

“Maybe she was killed here?” Isaac offered only to receive a scoff from his favourite agent.

“She died from blood loss Deputy,” Allison stepped in before Jackson could mock, “There was nowhere near enough blood near here for it to have been the kill site.”

“I know how she died, I saw her,” Isaac began then paused, looking like he regretted his short tone. He tired again. “Look Doc Deaton told us she had ligature marks around her ankles.”

“she was hung upside down.” Allison confirmed.

“Yeah but I watched this documentary on like war zones and militant extremist and stuff. It said that sometimes they have to take their victims to remote places to, you know, ‘question them’. Often  they do it by cutting them and letting them bleed to death slowly hung upside down. To avoid attracting animals with the sent of blood they like, dig a hole, or place them over a bucket or something.”

By the time Isaac had finished he looked a little embarrassed, at his suggestion, but obviously couldn’t bring himself to tame the smirk he sent Jacksons way. Jackson however was just looking back with a seemingly bewildered look on his face.

“You are an idiot.” he stated and Isaac deflated a little. “You think this guy just so happened to watch the same documentary you did? You realise the chances of this are like five million to o-“

“Shut up Jackson!” Allison interrupted suddenly.

“What?”

“Shush, I think Isaac might be right,” she waved off his distress distractedly and Isaacs smile grew back tenfold. “Think about it. This guy is meticulous, methodical, dedicated. All things that can be easily explained with a military background.” She grinned back at the young officer before heading over to the tree and squatting down. She pulled out a glove from her pocket and began fitting it over her hand while continuing her thoughts aloud.

“What if he served overseas. He could have learnt everything he needed from the locals and simply applied it to some of his victims.”

She placed her covered hand to the ground where the body had been discovered and started to dig.

“Now considering he would’ve had to walk her here, tie her to the tree, kill her, get her down, and get the hell out of dodge, I doubt he had time to bring several buckets along with him and then carry them all the way back to wherever he came from without dropping any. No he is way to organised for that. However digging a hole would only require a small shovel. Military grade ones can be attached to a belt, which leaves only his faith that the local sheriffs department would never think to dig…”

Suddenly she stopped pulling up the dirt when she was almost elbow deep. The two boys froze in anticipation as she slowly lifted her gloved hand into view. There was dirt, soft and wet from the damp ground as well as small bits of leaf and bark but in-between all of soil, saturating the no longer white glove was deep red blood.

“To bad he didn’t know we would have a deputy as quick as you hey Isaac,” she spoke smugly looking over to him with an approving nod.

Isaac totally preened.

Jackson merely growled at being proven wrong.

“‘Pretend inferiority and encourage his arrogance’.” Isaac quotes smugly. She wasn’t sure is he was talking about Jackson or the unsub. Probably both. Either way it sounded familiar.

Allison scrunches her nose up. “What is that? Shakespeare?” She asks curiously. Isaac goes to answer but is cut off by Jackson.

“Call a CSI team already,” he spat before turning around and muttering, “If this backwater town even has one.”

[sandersidess]

Partners in Crime

Guess who did this in like twenty minutes?! Hi hi!!!! So I did go a bit tiny overboard, but I am proud of this and if you guys want to add on, then go ahead! I would love to see your own input and any like future decisions. So this is Royality! Oh and I wrote this on mobile.

A/N: This was supposed to be up about three hours ago, but tumblr fucked me up as always

TW: Murder (multiple), A lot of blood, mention of gun and knife, bombs, mutilated bodies, Dark Roman and Patton, ASK TO TAG

tag: @smarterthaneveryoneelse @scarletsaphire @sanderssides-corner @peri-shns-brght @fandoms-are-a-gift-of-chuck @howtobetrash-org @internetwhy @cjcipher234

-

-

-

Roman looks at Patton and holds his hand, kissing his wedding ring. Patton looks over and smiles softly, humming and squeezed his hand gently. They both stare at each other, kissing each other and Roman made sure it was a passionate kiss.

“I love you,” Patton whispers once they break the kiss, holding the dagger in one hand.

“I love you too,” Roman smiles softly, holding his custom pistol, and leans his forehead against him, “Don’t die on me. Got it?”

“Shut up, Prince,” Patton giggles and puts on his mask after giving a final kiss.

“The couple being called the modern Natural Born Killers have hit the town of Mesa, Arizona! They have killed the owner of a jewelry shop and then killed a well renowned family. The suspects who have only been identified by the last name Prince and Love are at large and police urge citizens to stay safe! Lock your doors, install alarms and do not engage if you see them! Here are what we suspect how they look like, so I repeat, do not engage this duo! They are highly dangerous and will kill! Back to you Steve-“

Patton hums happily and stares up into Roman’s eyes as they dance to the piano music playing in the house. Roman gives him his ever charming smile, keeping a hand on his lower back. He kisses the bloody hand he’s holding, both ignoring the ringing of the victims phone.

“Where else should we go for our honeymoon?” Roman asks him with a soft tone.

“How bout New York? The city that never sleeps,” Patton responds and giggles as Roman twirls him and pulls him close.

“They’ll see our work of art,” Roman nods and chuckles, “We’ll make it into the museum, baby!”

“That’s always been your dream, ever since we were little kids,” Patton nods eagerly, “Roman! We’re going to be famous!”

“Let’s get a move on!” Roman says happily, Patton leading the way out, stepping on the bodies, as they both still holding hands.

“The duo we are calling the Royal Killers have struck five homes and five stores in Topeka, Kansas-“ “They robbed a shop in Philadelphia-“ “Rhode Island couple have lost their life to the Royal Killers-“ “The FBI are working tirelessly to find this couple-“ “We warn you, be cautious, and we will release more information once made public! Once again, be cautious.”

Patton blows out the smoke and hands the blunt to Roman, who kisses Patton quick and takes a hit. They stare up at the starry night, holding hands as they lay in the hammock. Patton looks at Roman and sighs happily.

“You’re the best, Roman. I can’t ever imagine losing you.”

“Neither can I. We will die of old age,” Roman looks at him and strokes his cheek, “We will die together, holding hands and staring at the horizon from our house in Venice Beach.”

“Come here,” Patron grabs him and pulls him into a kiss and Roman chuckles and pulls him on top of him. He drops the blunt on the person beneath them, which fell in a pool of their blood.

“The FBI day they are closer and have released the identities of the Royal Killers! The names are Roman Prince and Patton Love, but they may go behind the alias of Creativity and Morality, Alexander and Samuel, or Ricky and Patrick. Here are their mugshots from years back when they were captured as young adults after robbing an elderly. They both have their own distinctive features. Roman has a scar near his left eye, along with a distinctive mark under his right eye. Patton has a birthmark on his neck, resembling the shape of a heart. They both have tattoos on their shoulder of an armor and heart. If you see them, call the number on screen, the police or FBI. They are considered highly dangerous, their signature weapon being a nine millimeter pistol that is red and gold, along with an eight inch dagger, the end being jagged. Once again, do not engage. They are highly dangerous murderers.”

Roman watches as his husband laughs happily as he ran into the beach, sighing happily and took a video of him. Patton turns around, the sun hitting him just right and made him look angelic in his black tank top and blue shorts. Patton squeals happily as a small wave hit him, falling down on the wet sand. He turns to Roman and waves at him, Roman going towards him and set the phone down to record them. He runs to him and picks him up, spinning him around. Patton laughs and wraps his arms and legs around him. Roman took him more into the water, where it reached up to Roman’s abs.

“I wish I could marry you once more,” Roman says, stroking back Patton’s wet hair, his curls falling over his eyes.

“You looked so good in that red suit,” Patton hums and leans his forehead against him, “You looked like a movie star.”

“You looked so dashing in that dress. White with red fits you so well,” Roman whispers and sets him down, “Absolutely angelic.”

“PUT YOUR HANDS UP NOW!”

Roman and Patton then around, seeing they were surrounded by cops and a SWAT team. Patton held onto Roman’s hand tightly, Roman bringing him close. They were shouting demands, and it was terrifying Patton. Roman hid his face in his chest, both still ignoring demands.

“PUT YOUR HANDS UP AND SURRENDER PEACEFULLY!”

“Don’t worry dear, they won’t hurt you,” Roman whispers to Patton and kisses his head.

“They’re scaring me. I don’t want to be away from you,” Patton whimpers, tears welling up, shaking his head, “They can’t separate us!”

“GET READY TO FIRE! AIM-“

“And they won’t. After all, the world has to see our work of art, sunshine,” Roman grins and pulled a small remote out of his pocket and pressed a button.

At that moment, Roman pulls Patton down underwater as homemade explosives started going off. There were shouts and screams, the officers trying to scramble away but the area was littered with bombs. Only Roman knew where he put them from two days ago.

After what seemed like forever, but only two minutes, they rose up enough to where their noses were above water. They scanned the area and stood up slowly, panting hard. It was the one time they were glad they could hold their breaths for a long time.

“Are they gone?” Patton asks, his voice scared and still clinging onto Roman.

“They should be. All I see are bodies,” Roman says, “Get on my back. I’ll take us to the car and we’re leaving this country. They’re waiting for us.”

Patton nods and does as he says, Roman not being bothered that he stepped over mangled body parts and bodies. He avoided the bombs he planted, and reached the car. He had Patton get in and Roman starts the car, both still holding hands.

“They’ll never separate us, sunshine. Remember that,” Roman reassures Patton, who nods and shoots at the officer who stood up weakly.

With that, Roman sped off the beach and set off the last of the bombs as they both drove off to the cruise ship waiting for them.

“The FBI and all of the departments have no idea where this serial killer duo have disappeared! They are working with other countries to find them, but it is a tragic event! They have killed over forty officers and over thirty of the best from the SWAT team. All that was found was the cellphone of Roman Prince, which seemed to record their final moments on the beach before officers came into scene. It is a sad day, but the country is hoping they are brought to justice so-“

“You two sure cause trouble.”

Roman turns to his friend, having tucked in his husband. He stared at the trio, Logan stepping up.

“It’s called having fun, eyepatch. You should try it,” Roman smirks and snaps his fingers, “Want to come with us?”

“No, because you two are retiring,” Logan says and Virgil hands over the passports, “You two are lucky you’ve grown and changed from that mugshot. No one will recognize you.”

“Ah! That is a name I do love!” Roman laughs and shakes his head, “Romeo. Not too much different from mine.”

“Patton is now Pedro. It works that you two know some Spanish,” Dolos shrugs and hands over their documents, “Don’t kill anymore. It was hard to get these documents.”

“I worked hard to make those passports,” Virgil scoffs, the scar on his cheek catching Roman’s attention.

“We won’t disappoint you guys! Besides, I did promise Patton a beach honeymoon,” Roman chuckles and looks at the captain from the cruise, pointing the gun at him as he picked up a phone, the trio pointing their own at the other cruise workers, “and I’m not letting anyone ruin his vacation.”

[idorkish]

Fly Away - Chapter 2

If you want to search for this book of the series, the main tag will be “fly away munson”

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Since the day Susan had shown up unexpectedly at the clubhouse, things hadn't been easy. Angel was constantly on guard and the feeling of being followed had reappeared. There had been one or two times over the past few months that Angel felt someone was following her, especially when she had one of the children with her. Just like the last time, Angel refused to tell anyone in the club. She figured it was her paranoia since Susan had reappeared in her life. Angel told Edward and he had suggested she tell her dad, but she just waved him off. It would do no good at this point in time.

Since Susan’s reappearance, Bobby seemed to become more overprotective and demanding to know where Angel was going and who she was going to be with. Angel tried her best not to lie to her father but she knew if she actually told him who she was seeing, he’d want to meet him. Then all the guys would want to meet him and they’d run Edward off. Angel wanted to keep this part of her life for herself. Angel realized that when she was with David, she shared that part of her life too much with her family and tried to force David into that. It was one of the reasons for the breakup after all. No, Angel would keep her life with Edward for herself. It had been almost a year since they started and she had managed to keep his identity secret so far.

Edward would be leaving soon for the military and Angel would no longer have to continue lying to everyone. Thankfully she had been able to get Jessica and Donna to help cover for her. Jessica and Edward lived close to one another so Angel was always “hanging out at Jessica’s”.  Donna was always trying her best to distract the guys from the fact that Angel was sneaking around.

---------------- --------------- -------------

Angel arrived at the clubhouse with her arms full of bags of food for the mechanics and Gemma. She knew she had been distant lately as she spent more time with Edward and this was her way of making up for it. As she set the food down on the picnic tables, she caught the sight of Bambi storming into Gemma’s office and slamming the door. Bambi was 14 and very much a mixture of Happy and Tig, personality wise. She was more like Tig in regards to her emotions, she was guided by her feelings but she was smart about not letting them overwhelm her. Angel looked around the lot and toward the clubhouse. She knew she needed to check with Bambi before anything.

“Hey guys! I brought lunch. Help yourselves and don’t forget to clean up!” Angel shouted and waved at all the mechanics, who cheered as they walked over to the food.

“Thank ya lass. What’s the occasion?” Chibs was the first to the table and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Angel just smiled and shrugged before returning the hug. “Just missed you guys. Now eat up! I’m going to take some to Gemma.”

Angel grabbed enough food for Gemma and Bambi before making her way over to the office. She stood outside the door briefly and heard sniffling. Giving a small knock, Angel waited until the door was opened. “Hey you two, brought some food.”

Gemma stepped back and let Angel in the door before closing and locking it once more. Taking the food from Angel, she set it on her desk and went back to sitting with Bambi.

“What’s going on? Bambs, what’s wrong sweetie?” Angel knelt down in front of her sister and started to wipe the tears away. Bambi looked at Angel and clenched her jaw, “T-t-they’re fighting again and won’t stop screaming!”

“Who’s fighting, Bambi?”

“Uncle Kozzy! Dad! They just keep yelling and they won’t stop. I ask what’s wrong and I’m told it’s none of my business! And now Uncle Kozzy is…” Bambi stopped mid sentence and took a deep breath. “He’s leaving! He’s transferring charters and he’s leaving!”

Angel sat back on her heels and stared at Bambi. Kozik and Tig were best friends and rarely argued. “I’ll figure out what’s going on ok? Stay here, eat some food. I baked you and Gemma some cupcakes, just for you two. I’ll see what I can find out.”

Gemma leaned against the desk with her arms crossed over her chest as she watched the two interact. Over the past few years Gemma had felt Angel slipping away from them. She had watched as the girl she considered her daughter was no longer wanting to associate with the SAMRCO family and, although Gemma refused to admit it, knowing Angel was pulling away hurt. She had felt that pull even more when David was around Angel. She had caught multiple conversations about getting out of Charming together and getting far from the club.

Gemma eyed Angel carefully. “So what’s your plan then?”

Angel looked up at Gemma and shrugged. “I’m just going to see what I can find out. Or at least get one of them to calm down enough to tell me.”

---------------- --------------- -------------

Angel made her way over to the clubhouse, where she could hear the yelling once she opened the door. She closed the door quietly behind her and stood there with her arms crossed. Tig and Kozik were yelling at each other in the middle of the room with others trying to keep them apart.

“What the hell guys!” Angel stood with her hands on her hips as she glared at the two. “Either of you care to explain why my little sister is pissed off at you two and hiding in Gemma’s office? Or why she says Koz is leavin?”

Tig held out his hand to silence Angel and shook his head. “Not your issue. This is between us. You ain’t part of this club. Go outside until this is over.”

Angel narrowed her eyes at Tig but stood her ground. “It’'s my issue when my little sis-"

“She is not your sister and I said this doesn't concern you, Angel! She is my daughter and I will deal with her later! Now get out!”

Angel stood shocked. Never had Tig spoken to her like that. The others stood in silence as Kozik took a step in front of Angel and pointed jabbed his finger in Tig’s chest.

“Don’t fucking raise your voice to her prick! Just because you’re incapable of seeing shit for how it is...at least SHE IS worried about Bambi. There ain’t nothing else we need to talk about here.”

Kozik put his hand on Angel’s shoulder and guided her out of the clubhouse. “Want to take a ride with me? I need to get away from here for a bit?” Kozik didn’t give Angel a real chance to respond as he continued to guide her toward his bike and handed over his helmet. Angel knew that if she wanted answers that she would just have to go with him. Quickly she pulled on the helmet and climbed on the back of his bike.

Angel held on tightly to Kozik as he drove out of Charming. The feeling of being on the back of the bike was something Angel missed. As they drove, she closed her eyes and thought back to all the times she had been on the back of her father’s bike. Since Bobby’s last release from prison, Angel realized they had not taken a drive together. The last time Angel was on the back of a bike was the day Clay had taken her for a drive.

Angel wasn’t sure how long they had really ridden for and she refused to complain. It was comforting to be on the back of the bike. Soon Kozik stopped driving and tapped her hands with a chuckle. Angel mumbled an apology and let go. She hadn’t realized she had wrapped her arms so tightly around him.

“Hey thanks for coming out here with me. I’m sorry he was such an ass.”

Angel got off the bike and waved her hand dismissively. “Meh, it was bound to happen one day. Wasn’t the first time I’ve been yelled at to stay out “club business”, won’t be the last. Want to tell me what all the fighting was about though?”

Kozik smiled and threw an arm around her shoulder and guided her away from the bike. Angel finally took in the area and smiled. They were at a park that sat right off the water. “Nice try kiddo. Look, I’m gonna be leaving soon. I’m transferring up to Tacoma.  I want you to stay safe down here. Things with the club are...strained right now. Take care of Bambi too.”

The two sat in silence for a while before Angel finally spoke up. “Hey, remember how a while back there was that incident...the one where I thought I was being followed?”

“Yeah...Angel, how long?”

“About 6 months now, maybe longer. Since the double-mint-devils appeared in my life again.”

“Shit. Why haven’t you told anyone?”

“I”m telling you now.” She grinned at him.

Kozik laughed and shook his head before throwing his arm around her again and pulling her close. He pressed his lips to the side of her head, “You’re such a little shit, I hope you know that.”

---------------- --------------- -------------

Sitting at the dining room table, Angel stared at the different packets in front of her. She and Edward had talked about her going off to school and he actively encouraged her to start looking at wherever SHE wanted to go. “Why go where people want you to? Go where you want! You want to go to Alaska, fuckin go to school in Alaska! You want to stay close to home, stay close to home. It’s your choice babe, it’s your life and your choices.” In front of here were four different schools she had been accepted to. She could stay closer to home and go to school in San Francisco, as that wasn’t too far from home. Then there were schools in Arizona like she and David had planned. Then Washington and finally, Colorado.

Angel finally settled and knew where she would be going, now all she needed was to talk to Bobby and Precious about her decision. She knew that Precious would support her no matter what she decided. She was currently the only other person that knew Angel was looking to go to college.

“Tacoma? Seriously? What the hell do you want to school there for? Who the fuck talked you into this?”

“Dad, cmon. I need to do something with my life! The past year all I did was work and try to get over David! This is for ME, no one else. I have enough saved up to pay for most of it myself. It's either this or Arizona. And I know you haven't been ok with me going near those charters since our last visit when you punched a guy in the face for grabbing my ass.”

Bobby got up and pushed his chair roughly away before leaving the room. “Go wherever the hell you want,” he mumbled on the way out.

Angel remained seated in the chair. She gripped the acceptance letters and bit at her lip, trying not to let tears spill. She had prepared herself for him having a bad reaction but she did not expect him to walk away from her.

Precious stood up and walked around the table, wrapping her arms around Angel. “It’s ok baby girl. Ignore mr. grumpy. This is for you to better yourself. You want to go to Tacoma, Tiki and I will drive you up there ourselves. I am so proud of you Angel, you worked hard and you are going to be the first Munson to go to college! Hell you’re gonna be the first Samcro baby to go to college!”

Angel wrapped her arms around Precious’s middle and sniffled. “Why is he such an ass lately? I thought he would actually be proud of me for this.”

“Like I said, ignore him. Now that you’ve decided on where you’re going. We need to find you a place of your own. Your dad will come around and you know he’ll want you near the club as much as you can be. We have some time before school starts. Let’s not worry about his attitude and just enjoy getting you ready for your new adventure.”

---------------- --------------- -------------

Angel curled on the sofa next to Edward. A random horror movie was playing but Angel paid very little attention to it. Kozik had been gone over a month and things at the club hadn't felt right. Bambi glared at Tig more often than not and Angel knew there was something else going on. When she had announced her plans to go to college out of state, all but Piney, Opie, Chibs, and Jax walked away from her. Even Gemma seemed more distant. Luanne had been sad at first but she was nothing but supportive for Angel getting out of Charming.

“Hey you ok babe?” Edward kissed at her shoulder and wrapped his arms around her tighter. Angel glanced up at him and snuggled into his arms more, giving him a small nod. “Yea just thinking about things. I told my family about wanting to go to school. They haven’t taken it so well. The only people who are even a bit supportive of me are you, my mom, and my brothers. I Don’t know if I can go through with this. And then there’s us, ya know...There’s just a lot on my mind right now”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, I have no idea what we are. We’ve spent a lot of time together this past year and I like being around you. But I’m not sure what we really are or what is going to come of us.” Angel played with the hem of her shirt and refused to meet his eyes.  She wasn't sure why she had brought this up,  they were supposed to be enjoying the little while they had left together.

“Hey now, you have become one of my greatest friends and I do like you a lot Angel. I’m not sure what we are and I know we’ll be going different ways soon. I can say that you are the only one I’ve been with since we started whatev...well whatever it is that we have.” Edward leaned back on the couch and pulled Angel to straddle his lap,  “I’ve only wanted you.  C'mon,  we've been inseparable for a year,  I love you in so many ways.  Until we go our separate ways, I will do anything you ask of me, babe.”

Angel wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed against his body. “I like and love you a lot too Eddie. I’m going to miss you when you leave.”

“I’m going to miss you too. But we’re gonna write to each other and when if I'm in your neck of the woods,  well I'm staying at your place and eating your food.  You ain’t getting rid of me that easy babe. I’ll be back before you know it. And I’m sure you’ll find some lucky bastard to call your own while I’m away. Let’s just enjoy our time together.”

Eddie pulled her completely onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her middle. He pulled at the collar of her top and attached his lips to the side of her neck. Angel gripped the back of his shirt and bit her lip, trying to hold in a moan. “No teasing tonight Eddie,” she whimpered as he began to grind herself against his lap.

Eddie chuckled against her skin and continued to nibble and scrape his teeth against her sensitive skin. “But that’s where all the fun starts.”

---------------- --------------- -------------

Angel sat in her bedroom, surrounded by half filled boxes and her luggage with clothes just thrown in. It was a week before she would be leaving off to Tacoma and she wasn’t prepared. Despite the arguing and trying to convince Angel to stay close, Bobby had relented and actually took Angel up to find her own place near the college. They had managed to find her a studio apartment that was near the campus but close enough to the SAMTAC clubhouse. Angel knew she would be spending a lot of time there when she wasn’t studying and Bobby had promised to bring Precious and Robbie up to visit as much as possible.

Angel was glad that Edward had left before her. She couldn’t deal with leaving to Washington before him and not being able to see him off. Edward has left for basic two weeks ago. He gave Angel the information as to where she could write to him and she promised to send him a letter as soon as she was moved into her new apartment. Angel continued to pack her belongs and let her mind wander between what she needed and resisting the urge to cry when she thought of Eddie. She grabbed at a shirt and smiled. It was one that Eddie had given her. Angel had been wearing it to bed for some time now.

Precious leaned against the door and watched Angel move around the room. She watched her for a while with a fond smile on her face. They had come a long way in the past years and had grown closer. Despite her and Bobby slowly growing apart, Precious knew that Angel would always have a place in her heart. “Knock. Knock. How’s the packing going? Need anything?”

Angel looked up and smiled, setting the shirt in the nearest box. “Hey, I’m good. Just trying to figure out what I need. I mean, do I take everything, most things? Is this even the right thing for me to do?”

Precious made her way over and sat on the bed next to Angel. “This is 100% the right thing for you to do. Do not let yourself be stifled and held down because you’re not sure the men could live without you here. You’re only going to be in Tacoma. They go up there so often that their excuses for being angry are bullshit. This is your life. Not mine, not your father’s. As for what you take, that’s up to you. This is your apartment. Whatever you need once we’re there, well we’ll go out and get it for you.”

Angel smiled and wrapped her arms around the woman, squeezing her tightly. “Thank you Mom.”

---------------- --------------- -------------

Angel sat backward on the chair, her chest pressed against the cushion back. Bobby sat in front of her and stroked the back of her hands. Angel took a deep, shuddering breath when she heard the machine turn on. “It's ok baby. Happy is gonna be as gentle as possible. Deep, even breaths. Don't think of it.” her father's voice was reassuring.

“I got ya little girl. This won't take too long, let your pop know if it's too much and I'll stop.”

Angel could hear the words of encouragement from her brothers and uncles. Angel tensed as the needle hit first broke the skin. There was no going back after this. Angel kept her eyes closed and squeezed at her father's hands again. She could hear Clay's deep chuckle close by. This was probably a sight to see. Angel had her hair pushed over her face to expose her neck, she was clutching bobby's hands tightly, she had a stuffed animal between herself and the chair and was large enough that she could reach and bite it,  oh and she was in her lime green pajamas and  surrounded by men in biker vests in the middle of the clubhouse, getting her first tattoo.

It didn't take long for Angel to get used to the needles pricking her skin.  It still hurt but she did what she could to not make much noise or move.  Happy could sense when Angel wanted to flinch and removed the gun to give her a chance to move.   It didn’t take much longer for Happy to finish. Angel stayed seated in her chair and waited for everyone to come over and look at the fresh ink on her skin. Bambi was the last over and looked over the tattoo critically. The young girl pressed the surrounding skin and smirked when Angel jumped.

“Damnit Bambi!” Angel spun her head to glare at her little sister and cringed at the pain. Bambi stood there with a smirk on her face and gave a nod of approval. “Looks good.”

---------------- --------------- -------------

It was finally time. The cars were packed and the house was packed with people coming to see Angel off to Tacoma. Donna held Angel tight, whispering how she would do her best to bring Ellie up often to see her before letting go and wiping her tears away. Everybody wrapped their arms around Angel and bid her farewell. The last two were Gemma and Luanne.

Luann quickly and wrapped Angel in her arms. “I’m going to miss you, baby. You stay safe, you hear me? You need anything, I’m one call away and I will be up there for whatever you need. I love you, my sweet girl”

Angel held onto her aunt tightly and sniffled back her tears. “I love you too. I promise to keep in touch. I’m going to miss you so much.”

Gemma cleared her throat and shooed away Luanne before opening her arms. Angel reluctantly let go of Luanne and made her way into Gemma’s arms. Gemma held her tightly and rocked her back and forth. “Shit, my little girl is all grown up and flying away from the nest. I wasn’t ready for this day.”

Angel chuckled and relaxed into the embrace. “Don’t worry Ma, it won’t be for long. I’ll be back before you know it. And it’s only Tacoma. You know they’ll look after me. If not, I’ll kick their asses.”

“Gemma chuckled and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “That’s my girl. You keep those men in line. Don’t let them give you shit. You are as important to the club as Opie and Jax. They better treat you right.”

Once everyone had bid Angel a goodbye and the cars were packed, the Munson family was on the road. Angel and Precious each drove their own car as Bobby followed behind on his bike. They reached Tacoma before the end of the day and settled into the clubhouse for the night. Angel had snagged little Robbie and they went to share a room for the night. He was one of the people that Angel would miss the most. Angel snuggled her baby brother close and, despite the loud music and noise coming from outside the room, the two passed out quickly.

By early morning, everyone was awake and the Munsons were on the way to Angel’s new apartment. It didn’t take long for them to unload everything that Angel had packed. Precious had insisted on buying most of her apartment stuff in Charming, “so she has things from home!” and there was little that they needed to actually get for her.

Precious, Bobby, and Robbie spent the rest of the week with Angel as she settled into her new home. By the end of their time together, Angel had already checked into school, had orientation, bought all her books, signed up for some clubs, and was ready for her parents to leave and enjoy her new freedom. Bobby was reluctant to leave his only daughter. He knew things had been rough between the two, but he knew that this was something she was determined to do and he needed to support her. With promises that she would call weekly and that Bobby would come up to visit once in a while, Angel was finally free to enjoy her new apartment.

---------------- --------------- -------------

The semester seemed to go by quickly for Angel. In the short time she was in Tacoma, she had already found a part time job at one of the local cafes working the register and had signed up for various clubs. She had met many other students who lived in the same complex as her and they all met up weekly to hang out and work on any school projects. Then there was Johnny, who was becoming one of Angel’s closet friend.

The two met through mutual acquaintances and realized they had a few classes together. Angel was glad to be in Tacoma, where her last name didn’t bring the realization that she was a daughter of a Son. In Tacoma, she was just Angel - the girl who spent way too much time carrying her guitar around and with crumbs in her sweater. Angel and Johnny spent a lot of time together once they realized how close they lived to one another and that they both played instruments. Along with two other friends, the four thought it would be fun to start their own “band”.

Angel had kept her promise and called Precious and Bobby weekly. Angel had even found the time to call Gemma and Luanne, keeping them updated on what was going on in her life. Angel didn’t mind having to make the phone calls so much. It was her reminder to check her mail box, always with high hopes that she would have a letter.

The campus and surrounding areas was abuzz with student activity. Homecoming weekend was here and everyone celebrating. Nothing official was scheduled until the following day but that didn’t stop every bar, club, and business from opening their doors to the visitors. Angel pulled the mail from her box and laughed as Johnny twirled and danced behind her. The two had just got back from a small party at a local club and Johnny was hyped up from all the music. “Come on Angel! I need to MOVE! Ahh, that band was amazing! We should do that ya know. I think with some more work, our band could totally do that shit!”

Grabbing at his jacket, Angel leaned against Johnny with a large smile on her face. “He wrote back,” she waved the letter and squealed before jumping around happily.

“He? Ohhh lover boy has finally written his fair maiden?  Come on, open it!”

“Let’s get inside first, idiot. It’s cold and I am not in cold-fighting apparel!”

As the two curled on her bed, Angel slowly opened the letter and read it out.

HELLO BEAUTIFUL!

So I finally got the letter you sent. Glad you’re all settled in nicely. Things here are...well they are what they are. I’ve had my ass behind handed to me more times than I can count. Thanks for the picture of us. I’m keeping that close to my heart. Mostly because these idiots don’t believe I have a smokin hot babe back home. Well not so much home anymore, are you?

How’s the school life treating you? Exploring your options yet? I hope no one is giving you a hard time. I know your dad was being a shit about you leaving for school but I’m proud of you! You’re off on your own, making new memories, new friends...just don’t replace me!

Ok I warned you I was horrible at writing these type of things. There’s not much happening here. Lots of getting yelled at, horrible food, and being up at ungodly times. The lack of privacy here is frustrating. Shit, What I wouldn’t give to be in bed with you by my side again. Ok, nope! Won’t go down that path. It won’t be too long before we see each other again. Maybe I’ll be able to come visit your new place.

Holding the letter to her chest, Angel couldn’t help but smile wide. Johnny laughed at her antics and snuggled close to her. “So think lover boy will come visit you? You gonna tell him that you have replaced him with a devilishly tall and handsome brunette? He may have your love in bed but I have your love in music!”

Johnny and Angel laughed he rambled on. The two were becoming quickly inseparable and it was something Angel thoroughly enjoyed. She finally had a friend who would do whatever she wanted and didn’t expect anything but her company in return. “Yea, I’ll tell him all about you the next time I write him. Now go to sleep jerkface! And don’t hog my blankets! Tomorrow is…”

“HOMECOMING!” The two laughed together as they heard shouts from their neighbors to quiet down.

[unleashthemidnight]

SPN goes NSP: Guess Who’s Back (Just In Time For The Christmas) pt 2

Christmas Calendar: Masterlist SPN goes NSP: GWB part 1, part 2, part 3 Chapter name: Dinosaur Laser Fight People: Reader (x Gabriel), Winchesters, Danny Sexbang Synopsis: You were doing preparations for the Christmas celebration with Sam and Dean in the bunker when the party invitation threw you in the loop. Will you learn something new? Word count: 1100+ Warnings: Crack, language, song lyrics usage, The Frying Pan™ Notes: This is second part of the GWB and also part of the Christmas Calendar. NSP is amazing band called NinjaSexParty, whose songs, covers and music videos I have used. Songs are listed at the end of the fic. I would like to thank @serendiptious-esparza for helping me do some references by answering my questions; thank you darling <3 Here we go again, hope you all enjoy! This is still the shit that no one asked for. Reblogs and comments are loved Do not repost

It had been years since you were in school. Your hunting days happened shortly after graduation so you basically had more typical childhood and teen years compared to Winchesters. Sometimes you wondered how life would have been if you hadn't choose the hunter life. Would it have been even possible to just not do it? Would you have managed to avoid it all? You would probably have job from your field and somesort of apartment somewhere, maybe a significant other to go on your days and roam different stores and cities with. Someone who would hold your hand and whose hugs would tell you that everything would be okay. Someone who you would kiss in the rain. The things that you had with Gabriel. It would have meant that you wouldn't have met him. It would have meant that you wouldn't have met the Winchesters. You wouldn't have met Castiel. Sure you wouldn't have got yourself hurt multiple times and suffered from the pain unimaginable to most people, but thinking about your loved ones and not meeting them, the thought of that... You didn't regret any of that.

The hunter life wasn't easy, it never is. As much as you had have horror and pain in your life that you couldn't talk about to the most of the population, you didn't want to change a thing. You loved your memories. They made you the person who you were today. And you loved your brothers. They might have not been your real brothers, but family didn’t end with blood. And there you were now, back at the school, waking up at the familiar school desk near the windows in the backrow. Whiteboard, maps on the wall, cheap shelf for the books about different things. The technology was advanced since you had been in school but this classroom still used ever so familiar older school technology, the ones you could always seen in tumblr posts. The teacher’s desk was a mess; unfinished papers, tests to have, pens everywhere else than in the holder. Under one tipped over paper pile you could see handle of the… frying pan? What the... Your eyes soon found Sam and Dean next to you at the same row. ”Where are we?” you asked. ”Uh, school?” Sam answered shrugging his shoulders. ”Oh, are we now.” Sam received annoyed blank stare and sigh from you as you channeled your inner assistant district attorney from Manhattan. ”I just really - Wh- Why I can't move?” The boys didn't know and couldn't move either. As you tried to free yourself from the invisible force, other people, students by the looks of them, started to come in and found their own desks. You quickly decided to see where everything would go while Sam was more interested in what he would learn. The teacher walked in. You, Dean and Sam looked at each other not sure of what you were actually seeing. ”Hello class. I'm sorry but your normal professor couldn't be here today. So I'm your substitude teacher, Danny Sexbang, and this ninja science lesson's gonna rock your world. Are you ready to learn?! Alright, don't care, let's hit it!” Danny welcomed everyone. The substitude teacher was the same man as the host in the garage party. This time he had proper clothes on, a suit that would actually fit for the teaching job. 10 points to Gryffindor, you mentally noted. Only two things had remained the same with your jumping in different places: Danny Sexbang and the frying pan. By the process of elimination you made determinations on who just might be behind of the party invitation and knew more than wanted to tell. It has to be the frying pan. Everytime you tried to ask about something about the party invitation or the world shifting from your “teacher”, most peculiar things happened that either stopped you from asking things or you couldn't understand the response so you basically gave up with that. Maybe when class would be over, you could actually move and ask questions from other people. You didn't pay any attention to the teaching, Dean slept and Sam was naturally making notes on the papers that he had borrowed from another student. Sam said that he might as well make use of the situation when you couldn't leave. Danny walked over to your desk. ”Am I in trouble Mr. Sexbang?” you looked at him while playing your innocent card that was very familiar from your actual school days. Maybe you should have become an actor. Maybe you would have ended up getting a role as Marla McGowan on Broadway or the role of the doctor in The Normal Heart. ”Uh-huh,” Danny's voice got your attention again, ”But as much as I like to gaze into your beautiful starry eyes, I need you to close them and travel back in time with me for the next history lesson,” Danny answered to your question and whispered to your ear, ”It's gonna blow your mind.” Something in that made you shiver but still trust him. You closed your eyes. ”It was very ordinary day, day like this one at Dinosaur High, when stegosaurus raised his hand and called for high-fives. Tyrannosaurus saw this and got pissed because his tiny wrists caused his high-five to miss and he was like ”Fuck this!” Oh yeah, oh Hells yeah, it was classic old school futuristic prehistoric throwdown known as Dinosaur Laser Fight! But it was quiet because in space there's no sound. Did I mention that this took place in space? It did. Also, there were robots and sharks. It was a goddamn, balls out Dinosaur Laser Fight in space, with sharks - -” ”Doctor Sexbang, did this really happen?” one of the other students asked interrupting the monologue. The question made you open your eyes. You really wanted to see Danny's reaction. ”Uh, yeah. It's fucking science. Just ask Albert Einstein, he invented space. So shut your face,” Danny answered hurt from the question that interrupted his historically accurate storytelling, and then continued, ”- - and then bunch of fuckin' aliens from Mars showed up all ripping solos on V-neck quitars. The dinos, the sharks and the robots saw that the aliens came in peace so THEY KILLED THEM WITH LASERS. HOLY SHIT, CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT!?” The yelling managed to wake Dean up. ”And then they had a giant laser party. A Dinosaur Laser Party. The end. The assigment is to write 10 page analysis of one of the aspect of the aftermath of this fight. Mostly about the party. Make sure to add pictures so I don't fall asleep while reading those.” ”What did I miss?” Dean asked still half-asleep from you two. ”Just a punch of non-sense really,” Sam sighed disappointed. ”Mister Winchester, are you saying that my teachings don't meet your standards? This might not be Stanford but it doesn't mean you could be disrespectful,” Danny spoke to Sam making all of you tense up. Seeing your faces made Danny chuckle. Oh, he would have fun with this if the circumstances were different. ”Well then, I take that you won't do that again. Class dismissed.” For the third time, the world shifted making the classroom and everyone around you to disappear.

Christmas Calendar tag: @sumara62, @authoressskr, @be-fantastic, @pizzamanteachings Gabe tag: @nobodys-baby-now, @dlb1999 Hit me with ask or message if you would like to join!

NinjaSexParty's songs used in this fic, not in order

Dinosaur Laser Fight x

The Decision x

Ninja Brian was so Ninja that you couldn't see him in the locker that was in the hallway. The place where you never went.

[pixelsandpins]

I just spent this afternoon and early morning writing the most self-indulgent 2495 words I’ve ever written because I was stressed as hell. 

It’s also on Ao3, but heck to tumblr and their links not showing in tags apparently. Here it is, under the cut. 

A Year Later: Hugo

(A @dreamdaddygame ficlet)

Dadsona/Hugo (Obvs)

Teen, Fluff (mild cursing and slight innuendo)"And this one's called a camel clutch."

The entirety of Hugo's weight is on my lumbar, and his hands are threaded under my chin, pulling my head back.

It's awful.

When we were still on leg locks, it was sexy. Now it's just a literal pain in my ass...and neck...and back. But it makes him happy, and I'm only a little sorer than usual the next day.

"How's that feel? Do you like that stretch, honey?"

Oh my god, he's getting a sick kick out of this, isn't he?

"Ew. Really?"

When I look up, Ernest is standing in the doorway of the office looking down at us with a very particular shade of contempt. Hugo drops my chin and immediately moves off of me.

"It's not what it looks like. We were just wrest-"

"Wrestling. I know. Gross."

Ernest starts walking off.

"Wait!" Hugo calls out, and Ernest leans back lazily to appear in the doorframe again. "How was your weekend with Mike?"

"Fine. We went to the water park, and he bought me some games."

"That's great. So you had fun?"

"Yeah sure." Ernest shrugs and stomps off down the hall. We can hear the door to his room slam.

Hugo hops onto his feet, then pulls me up, being sure to give me a quick peck on the lips along the way. I could definitely stand for something a little heavier, but we both know we need to get dinner started.

The thing I had underestimated most when Amanda left for college was my willingness to actually cook a meal for one. I had been living on nachos and salami sandwiches for a solid six weeks until Hugo had soundly chastised me into eating dinner with him and Ernest as much as I wanted. This certainly made it easier when Amanda told me she'd gotten an internship that would be keeping her there for the summer.

I like to think that in the year Hugo and I've been together, Ernest has come to at least tolerate my presence, but it's so hard to tell with that kid.

When I help with dinner, my duties generally consist of leaning back against the sink and looking pretty. Maybe occasionally passing Hugo a spice or two. This time's no different, but there seems to be an extra bit of tension in Hugo's shoulders as he lifts a pot out of the cabinet and fills it with water.

"Something's bugging you. What is it?"

"Just...the usual," Hugo sighs. "I get...frustrated. I don't mind Mike taking him out to do fun things, but I just wish he'd leave something for me. It undermines my authority when he can just go to his other dad's and get the things that he has to earn from me." Hugo places the pot down hard on the stove and sets it to boiling. "And you know I've talked to him about it."

I did know this. Intimately. I had heard half of multiple heated conversations about it.

"I wish there was something I could do to help."

Hugo moves away from the stove and comes to stand in front of me at the sink. His fingertips find the counter top on either side of my hips, his chest pressing against mine. He leans in and gives me a quick peck that turns into the something more that I was pretty keen on before. He pulls away and rests his forehead on my shoulder.

"It's enough that I have someone to bitch about it to." He kisses me under the bottom edge of my jaw. Then my neck. Then the edge my collarbone under my shirt.

"EWWWWWW. IN THE KITCHEN? REALLY? I'd rather you go back to wrestling." Ernest is standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Hugo makes a clear point of not backing away from me this time.

"Spaghetti will be ready in about twenty minutes, so don't get too into one of your games or anything."

Ernest rolls his eyes and goes back to his room, again.

 When I get out of the shower later, Hugo is sitting in the middle of the bed staring down in irritation at his phone. He's only put his boxers back on which is just excellent, really, but anger doesn't look good on him.

"Boop." I press a finger to the space between his crinkled brows. "What's goin' on, teach? Someone about to get detention?" Hugo tosses the phone onto the bed and rubs his eyes under his glasses.

"One of the games that Ernest brought home. It was one I specifically told Mike not to get him, so I texted him, and he says 'oh, I'm sorry, it was a gift that my boyfriend got him.' And I just….we had an agreement. We had an agreement that if either of us brought new people around, we'd get to meet them first before Ernest. And he's been good about it before, you know? I know he's dated people. But it's like...as Ernest gets older, Mike thinks he can just let up on the rules, and now is the WORST time for that. We need to be able to show solidarity if Ernest is going to get his act together."

"Well, I mean….to be fair, I've never met Mike after all this time." I sit down on the bed next to him, careful to arrange my towel to not get the sheets wet. Hugo leans on my shoulder.

"That's different. You already knew Ernest because we were friends and neighbors. And I told Mike when we started dating for real. I even invited him to come meet you, and he could never find the time. Because he's a dick." Hugo lets out a huge exhale that rattles his whole body.

"From what I've heard, Mike's always been kind of a dick, right? Is this some advanced tier dickage we're dealing with?"

Hugo chuckles a little.

"No. I think...I think this time, it's possible, that I might be the dick."

"Whatchu mean?"

He sighs one of those impossible sighs again.

"Nothing. You staying over?"

"Why do you always ask that? Because you know I am."

"I know. I just like hearing you say it."

He bites my ear a little then runs his tongue along the inside of the outer ridge.

"Hugo. I don't have another round in me, and if you keep doing that…"

And he keeps doing that. And I'm already apologizing to my future self for how sore I'm going to be in the morning.

 I'm waist deep in a marathon of Doomsday Wedding Planner when there's a knock on the door. Hugo's got meetings after school, so I know it's not him. It's rare he comes here, anyway; I'm the one who goes to his place. When I go to answer, then, I'm not sure who to expect. And yet, still, I didn't expect Ernest to be standing there, bored looking with his school bag hanging off his elbows.

"Uh...hey," he drawls. Then he just stands there. Waiting for…something...I guess.

"Did you want to come in?"

Ernest shrugs and pushes past me into the living room, flopping down into the recliner. He still doesn't say anything until I sit down on the couch catty corner to him.

"I heard you and Hugo talking last night," he says with pretty much no pre-anticipation.

Oh, he heard us talking. Oh god, then he probably heard everything. OH GOD, THEN HE'S PROBABLY HEARD EVERYTHING THIS WHOLE TIME.

A year's worth of mortification sets in as one lump sum.

"Is he mad at Mike about his new boyfriend?" Ernest asks, staring at the now muted TV as it flashes through a montage of the chicest wedding chapels/bomb shelters on the east coast.

"No, kid. It's just...grown up stuff. Why are you asking me, though? Should really be talking to your dad about it."

"Because he'll say what you just did. That it's grown up stuff. Does he think I can't handle it? It's really fucking annoying, honestly." He rests his head on his hand.

Well, shit. I have to do some unexpected dadding, and I'm not even wearing my dad pants. Frankly, Ernest should be glad I'm wearing pants at all considering my usual lounge attire. Amanda was usually pretty easy with this sort of thing. I almost shared too much with her, though, I guess.

"Okay. Well, I'm not one of your dads, so will a man to man talk work?"

He looks as me for the first time, dropping his arm onto the armrest and raising his eyebrows. I guess that means I should keep going.

"Being a parent is...hard…"

Wow. Elegant.

"Luckily, you've got a partner. You're a team. You can work together. You argue, yeah, and disagree on how things should be done, but, generally, you've got each other's backs. When you're a single parent, though, it's even harder. You're doing a job meant to be a team as one person. It's...well...it's fuckin' rough, dude. Seriously."

I can't believe I'm swearing in front of my boyfriend's son. Whatever. It's not the worst he's ever heard from me, apparently. OH GOD I'M REMEMBERING, AGAIN.

"And the trick is that we're not supposed to let you guys know any of this is happening. We're supposed to sort of just keep everything under control without you ever knowing that we're all really just playing it by ear. Anyway, your dads pretty much have the worst of both worlds in a lot of ways. They've got all the bickering over how to raise you, but they're both trying to do it alone." When I started I had no idea where this was going, but hell if this isn't some damn fine fathering I'm doing. "So, I guess what I'm trying to get at is that there's some stuff that parents and grown ups have to deal with, but we don't want to worry our kids with it. And we don't tell you not because we don't think you can't handle it. We just don'twant you to have to handle it. It's not your job. It's ours. Am I-uh-making sense?" He's in his default bored face, so I can't tell if he's actually listening.

"So Hugo's not mad at Mike?" Earnest says flatly. I pinch the bridge of my nose.

"Hugo's got some…concerns related to Mike, but no, he's not, necessarily, mad. And he's certainly not mad about Mike's new boyfriend. So just...let dad take care of this one, okay? You don't need to worry about it. That's what we're here for."

Ernest stares off and away, thinking…maybe? It seems like a slightly different shade of apathetic, at least.

"But, you know, you can always talk to Hugo. He'll listen. Or...me...you know...maybe...if it's weird talking to him…" I add hastily, just a little worried about the door I'm leaving open.

"Okay." He's says it short and sweet, gets up out of the chair, and robots his way to the door, avoiding eye contact the entire time. "See you later tonight, I guess." The door half-slams behind him when he leaves.

 It's a week later when, instead of retreating to his room with his plate, Ernest sits with us at dinner. Hugo and I stop playing footsie under the table immediately to look at him.

"I haven't actually met Mike's boyfriend, yet. I know you were mad about that, but you shouldn't be. But Mike's got a bunch of pictures of him, though, and he told me about him and stuff. And he said that if it was okay with you, he wants me to, like, meet him." Ernest goes silent after having his say.

"Well, okay. I'm fine with that. I'll e-mail him later." Hugo darts a few quick glances at me, unsure. Ernest pushes his food around his plate a bit.

"I think we should all, like, get together. You guys and Mike. Just...together. Everyone." He pushes his outstretched fingers together to make them interlock a few times. "Because...I don't like it when you and Mike fight. You guys get pissy with each other and you think I don't know, but I do. Like, I'm not stupid. So I just thought...Well, I mean, we're supposed to all be a team right? We're supposed to work together...and stuff...or...something."

It's apparent Ernest is struggling to properly convey big thoughts with small words and growing a little frustrated with himself that he can't properly.

"Ernest," Hugo says softly. He reaches out across the table and places his hand in top of his son's. He looks like he wants to pull away but doesn't. "If that's what you want I'm more than happy to oblige. I'll talk to him tonight."

"Cool," Ernest replies. He pulls his hand away, picks up his plate, then vanishes like a ghost into the back of the house. The door closes quietly.

"You did something," Hugo accuses.

"Why the very idea. I'm offended you would even suggest such a thing." I flick my fork at him in defiance.

Hugo smiles at me.

"Did you father my son in my absence?"

"Again, I'm utterly shocked you would think so little of me."

He puts his hand on my thigh.

"Whatever it was, thank you. Really." He leans in and kisses me on the cheek.

"I didn't really do anything," I admit. "He just asked some questions and we just sort of...talked."

"And he listened, so you must be some kind of teenage boy whisperer."

"I'm just not his dad, is all. You remember what it was like to be that age. There are just some things you feel weird talking to your parents about, and I'm not his parent. I'm just some guy."

"Hm. Well, you're a little closer than you realize, I think." He waggles his eyebrows at me a bit.

"I don't-uh-what do you mean?"

"He included you in that 'us' earlier. And he came to you, didn't he? And he certainly sees you more than his other dad, nowadays." Hugo flashes half a grin at me.

"You know I was just getting used to not having to parent, anymore. No one told me I was going to have to put in a few extra years. And with a boy, of all things."

"If he starts calling you 'dad' before me, I'm going to lose it."

"Hey, if you need someone to call you 'daddy,' I can help you out."

Hugo stares me down over the top of his glasses.

"Oh? Really?" His lips meet mine then pull away slightly. "We can always give it a test run." When he kisses me again, the tip of his tongue touches my teeth. Then I remember and push him away just a little.

"I think you might need to consider some possible sound proofing options."

[thotragnar0k]

i’ve been occasionally vague in my tags recently (don’t know if anyone actually reads them when i do add them but anyway) and I figured i should probably explain myself.

this past month of august has been really hard for all the good things that have happened in it. i’ve been feeling really upset about my body, my eating habits and my lifestyle, and while i thought being at home wasn’t helping, i was wrong (for reasons that will be explained in this super long post - i am so sorry people who don’t care about me).

i’ve never been happy with my weight. friends of mine have probably noticed that i put myself down a lot - saying self-deprecating things like I’m ugly and one such thing today i’m nowhere near pretty enough to a) marry rich and b) have a sugar daddy (you don’t need context here) - and it’s a problem i am subconsciously trying to fix. 

but as i was saying, my body and i have never been on good terms. i think that my curves are in all the wrong places, and i feel like i’m in that gross in-between where no clothes look good on me, and I don’t have the right proportions for my tall (5′7-5′8) body.

i celebrated my 20th birthday this year, twice technically. Once a few days before with my friends and another the weekend of with my family. Firstly the night out with my friends. Sidenote: I’m not a ‘night out’ kind of girl. I don’t really like to get hammered. I will, I just won’t drink so much that I’ll throw up - mostly because I’m lazy and down want to have to clean. But as we were all at home, I figured fuck it, lets go out-out. Sometimes you just need to go out and get drunk with some friends. 

three things happened that night that made me hate myself. three things, I don’t think I’ve actually told my friends (both of which are on tumblr and may see this if i don’t mass reblog other things immediately after it), or if i have I’ve played it off. 

the first thing: my choice of outfit. again body issues. and lack of night out clothing. i don’t own any jeans that actually sit on my waist. i have high waisted jeans but unfortunately they always slip down to my hips (under my muffin top). my friends looked gorgeous. i felt like i stood out, but in a really bad way. sure the dress i wore was nice, but it wasn’t anything like the outfits they were wearing; jeans and a fancy top. 

the second thing: dancing on a bar in coyote ugly. i did it because, you only dance on a bar once and they were doing it. i can’t dance. i have zero rhythm in this body. dancing on a bar did nothing to help my self confidence. i felt like everybody was watching me and judging me and it made me want to disappear into my bed and never leave it again. 

and the third thing, also happening in coyote ugly; riding a rodeo bull. sure i’d love to say that i was too drunk to care. but i wasn’t. i was tipsy sure, but not too drunk. the thing that made me hate myself during this section of the night out - i couldn’t even get on the bull. my thick ass thighs kept sticking to the seat of the bull and my weak arms couldn’t pull my fat ass up. Sure I got up eventually, but the embarrassment of not being able to get on a rodeo bull was enough to completely slam dunk my self esteem into a trash can and into a bottomless pit. so that was fantastic. 

concerning the weekend with my family; i found myself crying in the bathroom silently before we went to cardiff because i wanted to dress up nice because we were going to a nice steakhouse, but my problems with my body just made me want to hide under a big baggy jumper. 

and i did. i found my biggest, baggiest jumper and i hid in it, because I couldn’t stand to see my disgusting body in something vaguely form fitting. no one commented on it, no one cared, but i did. and to be honest, i think it ruined my birthday.

and thats so sad, that such a small insignificant thing could ruin a while day. but it did. and to me it didn’t feel like a small, insignificant thing. it felt like a huge weight on my shoulder, drowning me completely. it also impacted my relationship with my boyfriend. he noticed that i haven’t been texting him as much as i usually do (not that im crazy, i just like to know how his day is going) and when we were conversing I was barely responding and being quite distant. and i hate it that that’s a thing i do; isolating myself to deal with my problems. i’m better now. i talk to him as much as i used to do, if not slightly less because i have nothing to do at the moment and there’s no point texting him for a cuddle because i’m not anywhere near each other for that instant gratification.

there have been many a night this summer where i have depersonalised (link here for those who want to know more) because of these issues, and its so hard to pull myself out of that floaty feeling. I’m better at it now than I used to be, but it’s still so hard. 

i’ve had so many things i need to do in preparation for third year of uni but these episodes of depersonalisation have really stood in the way of actually doing that. i’ve got photos of a mutual that i need to retouch and send back to her but i can’t pick up the energy to sit at my laptop and do that work because i feel disconnected to part of my body. 

and knowing she’ll read this, she’ll say just send them over to me un-edited; but the nit-picky, perfectionist part of my brain refuses to let me do that. i can’t send them to you because these aren’t perfect. they aren’t right. i can’t send them because this stray hair is out of place or this photo isn’t quite correctly exposed and sure, it seems trivial but it isn’t to me. 

i went to a convention this past weekend; asylum steampunk in lincoln. i was helping my mum sell her books, occasionally assisting a photographer and his team, and running around taking photos. it was an odd convention; i felt as though i’d both done a lot and nothing at the same time. usually i feel so tired after a multiple day convention that i need a four day nap to catch up. but i was actually okay. 

i learned a lot about myself at that convention. firstly, i oddly like talking to people and selling books. sure it’s hella tiring for just sitting behind a stall and occasionally selling a product. but chatting to people was actually really nice. my family tend to stick to ourselves. for welsh people (y’know that stereotype that welsh people never shut up) we don’t tend to socialise much, and networking is not our strongest asset. 

the other thing i, well i guess i re-learned; photographing people at conventions for fun is actually fun. For the past three or four conventions i’ve been to - comic, gaming and steampunk - i’ve always been thinking about how i can use the photos as a series for university. but this time; i wasn’t thinking about that. i wasn’t caring if the background was any good, or if the lighting was perfect. i was just taking the photos. and it was so relaxing and fun. it wasn’t work.

for three of the four days we were at that convention, i got into the spirit and i dressed up for it. One of the outfits, that was sort of like a steampunk-y mechanic was a wide-full leg jumpsuit that my mum and i made together a few weeks before. i tracked half of my journey of that on twitter, (the bits i did, the cutting the fabric etc - my mum actually sewed the whole thing together- though i did give her a shoutout on twitter for all her hardwork). I actually really enjoyed wearing that outfit (mostly because the pockets were s o b i g), for the other two days i went slightly more piratey, wearing striped brown and black l=pants and a flowey striped white shirt one day and a light lace skirt and off the shoulder top on the other. that skirt, i don’t know why i don’t wear it more often (aside from the fact it doesn’t fit any outfits i have and i’ll look like an idiot wearing it anywhere other than a convention) because i think i look so good in it (baring in mind the lack of body positivity i have, this is a big deal).

the other thing that i’ve been doing this summer is i’ve been getting into make-up and even fashion i guess, trying to learn how to do that stuff (man it’s hard, why didn’t i start earlier). make-ups not so much of a problem in what i’m about to talk about, but watching fashion videos on youtube is rather annoying when you’re an average to slightly above average weight. I’ve not found (until today, the videos i’m watching right now as i write this) any youtubers that are fashion related that are anywhere near the shape/weight that i am. They’re either super skinny waifs who can fit into anything they want (and like that one i saw, saying that a size fourteen is a great size for oversized clothing - bitch please, stop) or plus size and self confident with those curves in the right places and much bigger than i can relate to. not that there’s a problem with either, there’s just not as much representation for the ‘average’ person. there probably is and i just haven’t found it (currently watching lucy wood) and i need to look better into it. i can guarantee that is definitely the case. but still i’d love youtube to recommend those youtubers to me please.

something that i did realise from the steampunk weekend was that i was so busy ‘working’ if you can call it that, that i forgot to eat the crap that i usually eat during the day, and i guess i forgot to drink water (which is not a good thing, drink water kids). but the main thing is not eating crap all day, paired with the amount of walking i did that weekend (almost 30,000 steps over four days) has actually made me lose half a stone since the last time i weighed myself at the end of july. (so i’m very pleased about this) 

so sure, while third year is going to be so, so stressful, i’m making steps towards feeling better about myself and making sure i do 5-10 thousand steps a day and not eat as much crap as i usually do, but most importantly; learning to love myself and my body. 

oh my god this post is so long. i’m so sorry anyone who reads all this. 

tl,dr: the month of august has been depressing, body issues galore and i’m probably being ridiculous but i’m trying to get better.