#fuck almighty

[banannabethchase]

Just read a book from my district's curriculum and OH FUCKIN BOY was that a trip for an Autistic adult who spent most of their life trying to force themself into the "normal" box.

The Music of Dolphins was beautiful and poignant and impactful. But I think the author, without knowing it, wrote almost an allegorical experience of many an Autistic child trying to squish their identities into a box made for neurotypicals.

And fuck did that hit hard.

[fereldanwench]

.

[vivitalks]

ned chicane is sooo character. he's a skilled burglar but he's broke, he's a sensationalist and a cryptozoologist, he's a pathological liar who's just as persuasive when he's telling the truth as not, he refuses to harm a fellow human being, he runs a terrible and weirdly popular late-night TV show, he constantly tries to protect a town that does not return the favor, he is canonically in possession of george clooney's oscar, he's a self-declared coward who will always put himself in harm's way if it means protecting his friends, he has multiple fake IDs and passports and no one knows his legal name, he's the smartest dumbass you've ever met, he takes a bullet for dani as penance because hurting aubrey was his greatest regret even before they knew each other and he can't hurt her again, he can't let anyone get hurt again, he will not let someone else die because of him. he will not.

[writingfreezer]

the day after a very big argument, right as the sun started to set, you arrived home. it was eerily quiet as no one was there to greet you, no open arms expecting you, and no lips to kiss fondly.

it had been like that ever since the morning. you were just getting ready when neuvillette finally glanced at you, giving you the the first and only type of contact he had ever given you since your heated dissagreement last night. it wasn’t a loving glance, or anything of the sorts, really. his eyes met yours, and for a moment, you saw him like everyone else saw him; cold and emotionless. except, that wasn’t a good thing. no, for you, it had became such a habit of seeing his eyes light up at just the sight of you that this felt… bad. really fucking bad.

you sighed as you plopped your bag down and started taking off your shoes to put them on the rack. did he really mean the things he said last night? you thought. that you were clingy and sometimes too unbearable to talk to?

a soft, almost too subtle to notice platter was heard from a window nearby. you looked out and saw that the sky had suddenly darkened. weird, you pondered, before continuing to remove your jacket. the forecast didn’t say anything abo-

wait. pause. let’s put on our thinking caps here. another, and another platter was heard. the soft platter turned into a heavy rain sooner than you could think, and you lit up like you just had an epiphany.

obviously, that light quickly dissappeared from your eyes as soon as you realized what this meant.

”shit. fuck,” you mumbled to youself as you stumbled next to the sofa and ran up the stairs faster than any track team could ever dream of. soon enough, you reached your shared bedroom and immediately slammed it open.

the sight greeting you was exactly what you were expecting, but still, it made your heart ache. your stomach twisted, threatening to break if you didn’t do anything about it.

there, on the neatly-folded bedsheets, lay neuvillette. his face was hidden from view as it was buried into his big, soft hands. hands that you have had the fortune of holding many times. hands that now haven’t even graced you for the last 24 hours.

hurriedly, you rushed to sit on the bedside. the bed dipped heavily as you effectively slammed yourself down, making neuvillette’s graceful body jump a little.

he quickly turned around, facing the other wall so that you couldn’t see anything but his back, clothed in nothing but a t-shirt. (probably some trousers too but.. you never know.)

”oh, dear..” was all you could mutter, the sight of it all making your words stuck in your throat. multiple sentences formed in your head, suggestions of what you could say. you ignored all of them and moved closer to him.

”dearest? could you look at me, at least?” you asked, concern lacing your tone. it probably showed up on your face too, because when he did finally turn around to greet you, he immediately turned back around.

”do not… archons.” neuvillette whimpered. whimpered. if you were in any other state of mind, you’d tease him about his tone, but the sight before you dismissed the thought entirely.

a soft sigh escaped your lips and you moved closer just to run your hand on his side. it wasn’t much, but it was just what he liked. soothing touches, relaxing shapes being drawn into his skin. it was what grounded him the most. thank gods for your years of marriage.

”i am-” he hiccuped, uncharacistically loudly. ”apologies… it’s hard to-”

”do not apologize for the state you’re in, please. we both know that there was no preventing this…” lightning struck a few hundres meters outside your house, and that was your cue to gently drag him to face you, making him unable to hide anymore. from you, and from his problems.

he blinked a couple times as soon as you lifted your hands from his face, probably blinded by the unromantic big light right above him. you quickly jumped off the bed and turned it off, practically sprinting back and landing right next to him on the bed after.

”hi.” you smiled as his eyes finally met yours, and although his face was flushed, wet, and expressing nothing but sadness, you still found your chest swell up in delight.

his bloodshot eyes fluttered down for a second before looking up again. a laugh escaped his lips, too quiet and contained to be something he actually wanted to express.

”i am- uh.. apologies. i am sure this is not the best way to be greeted after a long day..” he averted his gaze away to somewhere behind you. you looked around to see if anything of note was there, but there was nothing, so you looked back. right! he’s probably just zoning out. you gave yourself a mental slap to the cheek.

you climbed forward, moving your hands to softly hold his arms. ”hey, look at me. i’m here, and you’re here, and we’re safe. just you and me.”

his eyes quickly shaked and returned to look at you, having to tilt his head up a little now that you were practically sitting on him.

”hi.” you said, smiling.

”hello.” he reliped, also smiling now.

a chuckle erupted from the both of you, almost making you forget about the harsh words that were said yesterday. almost.

”so,” you started, moving closer to him to rub soothing circles on his biceps. ”do you have anything to say in particular, orrr…”

the man below you sighed and cleared his throat. he opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. his expression turned sour, and then he tried wiping his face as well before trying again.

”i am… deeply sorry about last night. i expressed some things that were not true, and for that i feel bad.” he pointed out the window with his nose. ”very bad.”

”the things i said were only crossing my mind because i have been quite stressed recently, and… i haven’t been able to tend to your needs, or mine, for that matter. quite frankly, i was so engrossed in my own mind and work that you didn’t even cross my mind, which is a very rare occasion.” he huffed out a smile at his own words.

”i will not let this happen again, but for now, i am sorry.”

you blinked a couple of times and smiled.

”wow. that was very.. elaborate. even for you.” a hand reached out to hold your own, and it was as soft and gentle as you remembered them. to think, that you had been missing the simple touch of a hand after being separated for only a day.

neuvillette wheezed softly, looking away politely. ”it was hardly anything. i’d be able to think clearer if i hadn’t been bestowed this awful curse of letting everyone in fontaine know when i am feeling down… not that anyone knows that it’s me.”

”i know it’s you.” you smiled, softly shifting to lay down next to him.

”of course you do,” he replied, turning around and wrapping his arms around your body protectively.

���|、

(˚ˎ 。7

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じしˍ,)ノ

[briarrolfe]

on your most recent post you said “ESPECIALLY when it outs a trans woman”. genuinely why is it so much more important that a trans woman is outed instead of any other kind of trans person?

Because I know my violence statistics! Trans community is the closest thing I have to a family. I love my sisters, I want to protect them, and I want them to be safe.

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[crinkly-spinkly]

TW: Second surgery mention??

Guess who's back from the (almost) dead 🫶

The multiple 1-3 cm gallstones tried

but I FUCKIN LIVED 🤌🤌

Seriously though, who knew that was what was causing like 80% of my chronic illness symptoms all this time... The pain was getting so unbearable I could barely sleep without my abdomen feeling like it was melting from the inside out. The surgery was on Tuesday, and I already feel more like myself again.

You know what that means...

[narr4dotmp3]

Hey chat, Pauling here.

[spooksier]

watched hazbin hotel with friends last weekend and oh my god guys i could feel it turning me into a reactionary conservative ive never gotten so pissed off at a piece of media before. free all those voice actors from their chains.

[banannabethchase]

Hey Tumblr olds...anybody else remember squidkittens from the Glee days?

[vaggieslefteye]

CHARLIE MAGNE from HAZBIN HOTEL (2019): Pilot - "That's Entertainment" ↳ "So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through... redemption?"

[agueforts]

💥💥💥💥💥💥

[arthursfuckinghat]

Dude I get it I get why Arthur spends so little time at camp like aside from how that man doesn't get a moments peace from anybody who bothers him about chores or money or arguing, when the camp IS actually quiet Dutch turns on his fucking gramophone to play the same THREE SONGS OVER AND OVER

[atthebell]

hey guys sunday is the anniversary of the eggs disappearing does anyone want to pretend that never happened and ignore it entirely smile

[homicidalbrunette]

Hey here's three minutes of Plane Jane and Katya vibing/flirting you're welcome

[ptieuca]