#found this in my drafts and feel like this is more relevant than ever

[orange-punch]

you're bisexual

i'm bisexual

we're not the same

[atlabeth]

mine forever

request from @nghtwngs

pairing: nikolai lantsov x fem!tidemaker reader

a/n: SO sorry for posting this early and having to delete 💀 i was formatting and didnt realize i was not saving it as a draft lmao. but thank you for sending this in love!!! and PLEASEE send in as much nikolai as you want i miss writing for him so much

wc: 1.4k

warning(s): hurt/comfort. reader is insecure, nikolai is the sweetest as usual

join in on my 3k celebration!!

“You’re avoiding me.” 

Your eyes didn’t move away from the horizon when you heard Nikolai’s voice, though you felt your muscles tense. 

“Clearly not well enough,” you remarked. “Seeing as you found me.” 

“You know I’ll always find you,” Nikolai murmured. “But that means little if you will not talk to me.” 

Of course you were not talking to him. You did not know how to talk to him—not when you so clearly didn’t understand the issue plaguing you. 

All you’d ever known was the life of a Grisha. You were tested when you were young, revealed to be a Tidemaker, and whisked away to the Little Palace, where you’d been honing your abilities ever since. You rebelled against the one thing you knew, joined the side of the Sun Summoner, and now you were in the midst of a war for the very survival of your people. 

There were so few Tidemakers left after the Darkling’s massacre, which meant Alina and Nikolai were counting on you more than ever in their fight to reclaim Ravka. 

But when you needed your powers most, they disappeared. 

You— you just didn’t understand, because it didn’t make sense. You’d spent years studying the Small Science and how to wield it, how to manipulate the water around you no matter how miniscule. 

This was not merzost. You had never tampered with the way of the world, never attempted to bastardize the abilities you’d been granted.

Like called to like. There was a part of you that connected to the water, that allowed you the affinity for all of this.  

You had just… lost it. For no apparent reason. 

“There is nothing to talk about,” you stated simply. The cold of the railing shocked your fingers as you set your hand down, but you welcomed any sort of feeling. 

“Do not be ridiculous,” Nikolai said wryly. He came out onto the balcony and stopped beside you. You could see him looking at you through your peripherals, could feel his intent gaze. “Nobody avoids me unless they have a reason.”

You huffed a bitter laugh. “I certainly have a reason, moi tsarevich.”

“So we’ve gone back to titles?” Nikolai’s lips quirked up. “Shall I start referring to you as Grisha? Tidemaker, even?”

You scoffed. “That would be inaccurate.”

“Ah,” he nodded. “We’ve reached the root of the problem.”

“We hardly did anything,” you said. “Do you talk just to hear the sound of your own voice?”

“I do, as a matter of fact,” Nikolai said. “But you should know your scornful words have no effect when I’m aware of your true feelings.”

“If you are aware of my true feelings, you should know I would like to be left alone.” 

“You want to be left alone because you feel useless without your power,” he said. “Any man worth their salt would not fall to that, and fortunately, I’m worth quite a lot.” 

You finally turned to look at Nikolai, though you could not muster the full force of your anger when you did. He had that slight smile still, the glint in his eyes, and all you could think was that you didn't even deserve this kindness. 

“Because I am,” you said. 

He shook his head. “You are not. Far from useless, actually.” 

“You served in the First Army, didn’t you?” 

“I hardly see how that’s relevant—” 

“Just answer my question.” 

“...Yes,” he said. “I was infantry. The 22nd Regiment.” 

“And if you had lost the ability to shoot a gun, would you be allowed to stay on the front lines?” 

Nikolai shook his head. “I will not participate in hypotheticals to help you feel worse.” 

“Because you know it’s true.” You looked back out at the horizon—the sun was steadily setting. “I have no place here anymore.” 

He said your name with a slight huff. “That is not true.” 

“I’m not Grisha anymore!” you exclaimed as you whirled back to face him. “The only reason I have ever gotten anywhere— the only reason I am here, the only reason I ever met you in the first place— it is all because of my power.” You pulled your jacket tighter around yourself in the wake of a cold wind. The material was noticeably thinner than your kefta, but you could not bring yourself to wear it anymore. “I’m useless now. To— to Ravka, to the Second Army— to you.” 

His brows furrowed. “You are not useless to Ravka— and you could never be useless to me.” You averted your eyes, unable to meet the full weight of his softened gaze, and his frown deepened. “That’s what this is about then? 

“Don’t act like it’s so ridiculous,” you muttered. 

Nikolai had the nerve to laugh, and you glared at him. He held up his hands in defense, but he could not fully bite back his smile. 

“I apologize, lapushka, but I did not even consider that as an option for why you were so upset.” 

Nikolai took your hands in his, hands that had been the key to your power the entire life, that were failing you, and he held them like nothing else in the world mattered. “Do you know how absurd the thought of me not loving you is?” 

You glanced away, but Nikolai gently cupped your chin with a few fingers and tilted you back to meet his eyes. 

“Because it is,” he continued, letting his hand fall back down to grasp yours. “I love you with everything in me. I love you because you are you—not because of your powers. Not because you are Grisha.” 

“Who am I if I am not Grisha?” Your voice came out as little more than a whisper, near a desperate plea. You’d never felt weaker, never felt smaller. The only thing you’d known all your life had been ripped away from you, and you felt as if you’d been shoved into an endless void. 

Nikolai said your name softly as he squeezed your hands. “You are a soldier of great renown. A revolutionary on the right side of history. The most loyal friend someone can have. And lest you somehow manage to forget it, you are the woman I love.”

“You deserve better than—” you swallowed the lump in your throat. “—than some broken, failed Grisha.”

“You are not broken,” Nikolai murmured, and he never looked away from your eyes as he lifted your hand to press a kiss to the back of it. “We are merely on… a different path.” 

“A different path,” you repeated, and you could not help your wry laugh. 

“Yes,” he nodded. “And we will go down every step of it together. Do you understand that?” 

Nikolai fought for everything he had, despite his standing as a Lantsov. He was a soldier on the front lines, he rose through the ranks on the sea under a pseudonym, and now he was clawing his way through useless formalities in order to take back the throne that he deserved. 

And here you were—someone who was given everything because of some power inside you. And now you didn’t even have that. 

It just did not seem right. It did not make sense. For a man as powerful as Nikolai to stick by your side despite such a misgiving. 

“If you don’t, that is alright.” Nikolai shrugged. “I will just have to spend extra time showing you how much I revere your very being.” 

“Nikolai,” you murmured, and his grip on your hands tightened. 

“I cannot pretend to understand what you are going through,” he said. “I cannot lose what you have lost because I’ve never had it in the first place. But I can promise you wholeheartedly that we will figure out what is wrong. Together.” 

“And what if we don’t?” you asked. You couldn’t help it. 

“Then nothing will change,” Nikolai vowed. “Milaya, nothing can tear me away from you, whether you are Grisha or not. Do you understand that?” 

A part of you still could not. Who were you if you were not of use? 

But when you met Nikolai’s eyes, those beautiful hazel eyes that seemed to glow with the sunset, full of softness and admiration and love, you found that you could start to.

You may not have believed in yourself, but Nikolai did. And that had to mean something.  

“I’m beginning to,” you murmured. 

“Good,” he said, and his lips quirked into a smile. “But fear not, milaya. I hold enough love for you inside of me for the both of us in the meantime.” 

[5am-mist]

oh my beautiful favorite bella writer, I have come back for more tee hee. would you possibly be open to write something were reader is an interviewer who is interviewing bella, flirting ensues >:33 (also take ur time bby ur work is the best <33)

Interviews

°pairing°> bella ramsey x reader

°summary°> you finally get the chance to interview the bella ramsey (who you may or may not have a huge crush on) but when they start flirting with you, you can't help but flirt back

°requested?°> yuppp!

°cw°> some small use of y/n just thought i would mention that!

~°A/N°~

OMG IM LITERALLY GIGGLING, BLUSHING AND KICKING MY FEET RN YOU'RE TOO GOOD TO ME <33 Thank you for the request and for being so patient with me i really hope this turned out how you wanted also i used she/her pronouns for bella hope thats ok! And im also just gonna apologize cause i know absolutely nothing about flirting and sorry if this isn't that good i haven't been feeling well at all lmaoo. i also made up a network you interview under so i hope thats ok! love youu <33

You were quite a well known interviewer and had developed quite the following. You'd interviewed countless celebrities at this point in your career, some more famous than others (not that it mattered to you all that much) but most of them very sweet.

The interview game was quite competitive or atleast more competitive than most would think. It was always a race to interview the most relevant celebrities. You had never been all that phased though, you enjoyed your job and yes as much as it was important for you to stay relevant you found that it was just as important that you interviewed celebrities you liked.

So that's what you did, but there was one celebrty on your mental list that you haven't interviewed. Bella Ramsey. Bella was with no doubt the celebrty you wanted to interview most, it wasn't that she didn't want to do the interview or that she was to busy no you just hadn't actually reached out to her manager yet.

You thought it was silly honestly. This was something you had wanted to do for ages but everytime you began typing the email you'd overthink and immediately stop yourself all because of the stupid crush you had on Bella.

It wasn't that stupid of a crush, it was totally justified in your mind because i mean who didn't have a crush on her? It made you so fustrated, you wanted to interview her more than anything in the world, why couldn't you just do it?

Here you were sitting infront of your laptop staring at the email you drafted to send to Bella's manager. You must've read it 1000 times, you checked every word for spelling mistakes and made sure your sentances were structured proffenssionly but it still didn't seem right. You were arguing with yourself, half of you saying this was perfect the other saying that it felt like a stranger wrote it.

You ended up scrapping it but this time you were going to do it properly. It was short and sweet and you made sure that it actually sounded like it came from you, even though you weren't 100% happy with it, you decided to send it.

The next morning when you woke up the first thing you did was check your emails and to your surprise, you already recieved a response. Bella wanted to do the interview with you!From there you and her manager discussed the time and date and you also gave her the studios address.

...

The day had finally arrived and you were ecstatic. You were going to finally get to interview the Bella Ramsey. It truly was a dream come true. The morning dragged on far longer than you'd liked but eventually the time came for you to head to the studio.

You were talking with the camera man making sure all was set and ready to go when Bella and her manager walked in. You stood there for far to long trying process that it was actually happening before snapping back to reality and going over to greet them.

Bella was nicer then you could have ever imagined. She was kind and gentle but most importantly she seemed just as happy to be here as you which gave you a sense of comfort. After telling Bella's manager that she could sit just off camera, you two decided to get started.

You waited for the camera man's signal and then began. "Hello welcome back to Zee Network I'm y/n and today im here with Bella Ramsey." you said with a smile on your face. "Hello!" they gave a quick wave and smile to the camera.

"Thank you for joing us today Bella, may i ask what has your experience been with the media lately? With release of the last of us series, you have gotten alot more recognition what is that like?" you were fiddling with the mic in your hands, another thing that you were known for was not reading from a script which normally was fine but today it really wasn't any help.

"I would say I've had a bit of a mixed experience lately. I have received many new fans and loads of support but i have also recieved a significant amount of hate. I try not to let it affect me but every now and again i will read a comment that really cuts deep. I appreciate the recognition i have gained and sometimes we just have to take the good with the bad." she told you, she seemed torn between loooking at the camera or at you but ended up deciding to look at you.

The interview continued on for a few minutes before Bella finally spoke up, "Do i make you nervous?," she had very clearly seen you fidgeting with the mic, you looked at her extremely confused what to say next. Was Bella Ramsey flirting with you? No, you were sure that you were just jumping to crazy conclusions.

"A little bit, I've wanted to do this interview for a while i guess im just a bit nervous to mess things up," you tried laughing it off. "I've also wanted to do this interview for a while, I've seen your work and you seemed like such a cool person now i know i was right,"

She absolutely was flirting with you. Now the way you saw it was you cluld continue the interview like normal and stay 100% professional or you could flirt back. You chose the latter.

You tried to do be smooth about it (trying to avoid the camera man noticing so that you wouldn't get yelled at) but still obvious enough for Bella to notice.

When the interview was over you walked over to the concessions table to grab some water but were called over by the camera man. He scolded you lightly for your behavior this interview but said he'd let it slide one time.

After being scolded by her manager Bella made her way over to you, she said she wanted to apologize but you told her it really wasn't a big deal.

"I meant what i said though, you seem cool and i'd really like to hang out sometime," now it was her turn to be nervous. "like a date?" it was an incredibly bold move but you were willing to take your chances. " yea, like a date." she flashed you a hopeful smile and of course you said yes.

Bella then handed you a small white paper with their number and a small 'can't wait to talk to you' scribbled on with black ink before scurrying off with her manager to the car that was currently waiting for them.

[se7ens-oc-heaven]

Fun tip from your local oc hoarder: if you have old ocs or concepts that never went anywhere, didn't quite grab you, just didn't quite work - re-insert them into the world as the npcs. The background character. The side cast.

And here's why, in a nutshell - it'll help your world feel more cohesive, to you and to anyone seeing it.

Yeah, sure, you can hastily slap together a bland shopkeep during a shopping scene, or slip in generic fan designs at a concert. But if you have someone Established, specific, someone who doesn't Have to reoccur, buuuuut... maybe the main characters always go into the store during so-and-so's friday shifts, or maybe you have concert scenes frequently enough that you'd start picking out the same fans who always attend for their favorite band... Adds to how natural it all feels, you know?

Does it have to be an old oc? Can't it be someone made to fit, I hear you ask? Well, sure! And obviously if you only have one or two ocs that aren't active, you'll have to anyways. But it's a two birds with one stone exercise - because now you've streamlined your process for having an established npc. You already have an idea of how that old oc looks, or talks, or acts. You may already know what setting they'd likely frequent, or even miscellany like what music they like or hobbies they have. Your generic npc doesn't have to have speaking lines or relevance - but if they needed to or you wanted them to, now they can. They'll have substance that keeps things from feeling too flat.

And idk, obviously some people don't pay much attention to things like that - but I've found that it makes a huge difference to me even when I hadn't realized it. It adds some extra depth to the world in small ways, that you may or may not ever use, but that way it's already built in. No scrambling or extra work to project traits onto some faceless character who talks to your protag about musicians for one scene.

This is also helpful for subverting "kill your darlings" a bit, for those who struggle a lot with that concept in their writing and worldbuilding - because for me, my problem tends to be that it's not that the darling is Entirely Pointless, it's just that they aren't a good fit. Killing a really good idea and banishing it to the drafts forever can suck. But learning how to Recycle the darling helps keep it in relevance, but by plugging it in to a better purpose than the original draft. That makes it easier to cut ideas out of my writing - because I can rest easy knowing I have it in reserve for its time to shine elsewhere.

I'd imagine this won't work for everyone, but I've found as I work on my hero story that it's added a lot of joy. Characters who fell to the sidelines or into obscurity simply because they weren't cut out for hero business now have time to shine in other small ways.

I have a girl who realistically will end up just being a background jogger. But she's also on a track team, and likes handmaking pottery in her spare time. I have a guy with weather powers, but he's focused pursuing being a talented violinist, with minimal active involvement in the hero business beyond happening to have heroes who are fans of his work.

Heck, one of my favorite characters is a duo of guys sharing a body that are just waiters at the local diner. One of them can reverse gravity or even practically rewind time with the snap of his finger if he so chose. These are powers that he studies endlessly for so he can hone and refine them better. But all he cares about is protecting his family and friends, so all you typically see him use his powers for is preventing glasses from being broken or saving his crush from tripping.

It makes me happy to see my kids just going about their day, filling a role in the background. Will they be more relevant? It's possible! But even if they aren't, there will always be glimpses - of the redhead jogging down the street, of someone in the middle of listening to a track from a classical violinist, of a waiter effortlessly stopping plates from being dropped in the middle of taking an order - all in the backdrop of whatever panel or scene or what have you that comes up.

It helps it all feel more like a world everyone belongs in, rather than a staged play. You know? And it's a very fulfilling feeling for me, both as author and as reader.

So yeah. Don't be afraid to recycle those old ocs. Tweak or streamline them if you need, but if you hold them even a little dear to your heart and can get them to click, I promise you won't regret it.

[yellowhollyhock]

Appearing in the middle of the night to ask questions? Couldn't be me.

11) what’s something neat you’ve learned while doing research for something you were writing? also, how much do you worry about doing research in general?

12) do you ever have trouble focusing on writing? how do you get around that?

16) where is your favorite place to write?

76) what is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain? 

yayay friend! Hope you got some sleep akfjakajag

11) research

In general,, I don't very much. I used to much more when I was a kid. College and certain events surrounding it linked up a lot of the research and revision process with memories that often cause my brain to shut down. Holy cow that seems a lot more serious when I write it out.

Anyway! Slowly I am getting back into it. Thinking back I think the best discovery I made while researching was actually a song, because I was looking for an extremely specific type of song for a character to reference, and found Strength and Doubt by Son Volt. Liked it enough that I looked more into the group and I dig their vibe

12) do you ever have trouble focusing

lolllll yes. How do I get around it? uhhh

usually just keysmash my way out. idk how relevant that is to anyone else but, if part of a story is difficult to focus on I just jsjaofjaosbwi to the next part. Especially early on when I was getting back into writing, all my drafts were pretty much an entire lot of keysmashes with some words or phrases here and there to let me know generally what I was thinking (or sometimes to completely fail to let me know what on earth that meant XD)

oh music also can be a big help! that one's tricky because it can also very easily become distracting or overstimulating but when it's good it's great

16) where is your favorite place to write?

hmm, I don't know that I notice my setting all that much. Bedroom is nice, if nothing else because it's quiet

76) what is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain?

uhhh. Realizing that I don't write villains often lol

well I would say, even more so than with all characters, it helps to keep their goals front and center

Jasper Barlow, for example. He has all kinds of stated goals, what he wants to accomplish scientifically blah blah blah. But when I'm writing him I'm really only focused on one goal: push further than anyone else will. He considers himself indisposable specifically because he isn't squeamish. And the more inadequate he feels the more he tries to think up ways to get at the info he needs that would shock and horrify other scientists. He specifically wants to scare people or gross them out because it makes him feel superior

[msmargaretmurry]

ooh becky msmargaretmurry i have to ask about your rnh thoughts here because while i have never been in the oiler trenches and do not (Do Not!!!) intend to start now, i have been watching on the sidelines since the hall and eberle days and i LOVE to hear your opinions

oh thank you for asking anon!! for context i started watching the oilers on purpose in like 2010ish (i had a friend who was super into hall/eberle and i was NOT immune to that) — i do not claim to be an expert on any of this at all, this is just based on my own experiences and thoughts and ponderings. also for the record i think rnh is great. he is an oiler i am extremely fond of, and i'm glad he seems to have found a solid role there that he's content with and has found success in.

so to me the ryan nugent-hopkins of it all goes something like this:

when the oilers drafted taylor hall first overall in 2010, HE was supposed to be the savior of the franchise. the oilers had lost in the scf in 2006 and then immediately not made the playoffs for four straight years and no one was happy. they drafted taylor, hyped him up SO hard — this era was kind of the the advent of current Online Content era and they were making little videos of him arriving in edmonton, showing him around, fans recognizing him on the street. i feel like nowadays thall's stock as a player is like "good but not GREAT" but you must understand that when he was drafted first overall they were expecting him to be GREAT. him, plus hot young swedes linus omark and magnus pääjärvi, plus canadian world juniors hero jordan eberle had the oilers faithful (and the oilers front office) CONVINCED they were going to be turning things around. people were making t-shirts that said

HALL Omark Paajarvi Eberle

— HOPE, you see???

anyway obviously that season did not actually go that great. they finished last in the league. i think they won something like 25 games all season. and they wound up with another first overall pick, which was our boy, the nuge.

and the thing is, ryan was expected to be very good, but he was NOT expected to be the savior of the franchise. that was already taylor hall's job. there was a lot of concern his rookie season about him being too skinny and not strong enough to really make an impact at the nhl level yet (and to be fair, he DID look like a baby deer out there). the people and the powers that be were very much like, we're glad to have him, we think he'll be a great piece of this rebuild, but there was much more willingness to be like, okay well he might need a few years to finish baking.

rnh's rookie season was better than the season before, but it was still not good. they did not come close to making the playoffs. they were still very bad. the blue jackets were also very bad, and a friend and i drove to columbus and got seats on the glass for oilers/jackets for like $50. extremely funny experience, 10/10, do recommend.

(not relevant to this narrative but a very fun fact imo is that despite the oilers but godawful that season, 2011–12 had two of my favorite oilers games i ever watched: sam gagner's 8-point night against chicago, and a 9-2 win ALSO against chicago, who was one of the best teams in the league at the time. as a bl*ckhawks hater then and now, watching this clown car oilers team run roughshod over chicago brought me immeasurable joy.)

however, the only one of the young stars who was REALLY living up to expectations at this point was jordan eberle? iirc he lead the team in goals AND assists that year. the masses were starting to get impatient with the performances of the other young stars, especially first overall franchise savior taylor hall.

and the oilers won another draft lottery. (you can imagine at this point the rest of the league was already pretty sick of the oilers winning draft lotteries.) they drafted nail yakupov first overall. i am not going to dive deeply into the yakupov saga, because we would be here all night, but suffice to say that, no, he did not live up to first overall expectations, but also, yes, he was very much punished for Being Russian In Edmonton, and those two things cannot be untangled from each other. however, in the context of the nuge of it all, this leaves rnh in an interesting and particular spot: he is still not expected to be taylor hall, and wow he looks like such a nice pick compared to yakupov. rnh is playing pretty well! not all-star numbers or anything, but again, he's not the cornerstone of the franchise rebuild. he is an important brick, but not the foundation.

not like the rebuild is working anyway. with their arsenal of three straight first overall draft picks (and canadian world juniors hero jordan eberle), edmonton misses the playoffs for the seventh straight season. and then they miss them again. and then they miss them again. and it's not even like assigned franchise savior taylor hall is playing poorly — other than one slump of a season he is consistently putting up 50+ point seasons, including one 80 point season! but the oilers as a team are still a laughingstock in the league. it's not just that they're missing the playoffs. they are consistently near the bottom of the league.

to be clear, i don't think this was the fault of the players. i think the oilers were (are) pretty shit at management and were (are) pretty shit at prospect development. i think that when you have a team with that many decent-to-good players and you can't get out of the basement that the problem is systemic. but god forbid the front office take a good long look inward to diagnose the problem within themselves. no, the problem was that assigned franchise savior taylor hall was not doing his job (saving the franchise).

not that there wasn't any frustration toward other players, including rnh. there was frustration toward the team as a whole, but hall often bore the brunt of it. omark and pääjärvi were gone by around 2014. eberle was still well-liked but it was kind of accepted that he wasn't going to change the fate of the organization. the idea that the oilers needed to ship hall out becaue HE was the problem was in the air before the 2015 draft lottery.

and then the oilers won the 2015 draft lottery, and with it, connor mcdavid. people were not happy. (please click on this link it's so funny.) the oilers were so bad at this point that it was just generally accepted that connor going to the oilers meant the prime of his generational-talent career would be wasted by an incompetent team. honestly not really feeling like we've been proven wrong at this exact point in time!

however: connor mcdavid? brand new savior! way better savior than taylor hall ever would have been! the last five years of rebuild weren't REALLY a rebuild, the real rebuild was going to start with mcdavid!

and where is the nuge in all this? he has been pretty quietly plugging away, turning into a very good and reliable nhl player. a consistent 40–50 ish point player, not bad! fast forward a few seasons into the mcdavid era and he's putting up 80 points, 100 points! he's the longest-tenured oiler. the edmonton people and powers that be seem to really value him! which is really awesome.

this is not to say that there was never any "nuge should be better" discourse or any frustration with him when the team was doing so badly, because there was absolutely frustration with the whole team, including him. i do distinctly remember hearing the phrase "the oilers need more from ryan nugent-hopkins" more than once on the broadcasts. nuge finding his role on the team and the notable success he's had in more recent seasons has been a process, even though he hasn't ever been ~bad at the nhl level. however, imo, his positioning between noted disappointments hall and yakupov and also assigned saviors hall and mcdavid did put him in a unique position where people had a little more patience with him and blamed him less for the team's struggles than his fellow first overalls.

i do still miss the kid line sometimes though.

[joys-of-everyday]

Attachment

I have been away for a while, during which I have finished a degree (whoo!) and lost all of my drafts (sad!). I had a fancy website for organisation and I closed the tab and 6 months passed and I simply cannot remember where they have gone. So, back to word documents and I’m never putting my faith in a website again, at least not without bookmarking it. Any threads I was working on are gone. Adios! Probably for the better, since I’ve lost my momentum on them.

I’ve sufficiently curated my feed such that fandom discourse mostly doesn’t reach me unless I actively go out and search for it, and who has time for fandom discourse when you’re crying over exams, but inevitably SY vs SJ drama peaks in sometimes and… isn’t discourse so fascinating? Don’t you want to overanalyse it like you have nothing better to do in your life?

I love discourse, truly. It gives me so much joy.

You know, back in the ancient days (2020), I got into cpop. Cringe. Why is the idol fandom like this? Why am I like this? Anyway, I discovered an idol whose words… touched me. Deeply. Utterly transcendent. Relatable af. My gawd my blorbo understands me like nobody else etc. etc. I literally wrote down quotes and stuck them to my wall, that was how far it got (and I didn’t even have the excuse of being a teenager).

Now, unsurprising to those with any awareness of how the internet operates, as quickly as discovering the parasocial love of my life, I ran into the fans and the antis. ... .... *sigh*. There’s a lot to say about the dynamic of these groups, but what strikes me about that time is a vivid memory of obsessively reading anti content and feeling… well, hurt. More than hurt. Personally attacked. It was like everything I found relatable in this idol was being publicly criticised by the faceless masses, and all my worst fears about how people hated me were right there on the screen. I had to remove myself from idol news because it was really starting to get to me.

And as much as it was distressing, it was fascinating for me experiencing it, because I was a sensible adult (questionable) by this time! I knew the difference between reality and fiction! (and idols, as a brand, are basically fiction) But in relating to a figure on screen, in attaching a metaphorical part of myself to that figure, I’d opened myself up to a strange kind of vulnerability. Through this proxy, I’d put myself out into the world, and was automatically interpreting any negativity, regardless of whether it specifically applied to me or not, as an attack on me.

This, of course, is stupid. They weren’t attacking me. They didn’t even know of my existence. Even if, yes, the things being criticised were sometimes related to me and my experiences, 1) they were not criticising me and 2) online criticism tends to be… a teensy bit exaggerated.

To bring this back slightly, fictional characters can be an extremely powerful way to work through feelings that are a little bit too ugly to confront with directly. Maybe I’m weird, but I do this intensely. Most of my emotional processing involves sobbing over made-up situations involving fictional characters at inconvenient times of the day. The flip side to this is that what should be not-that-deep discussions on fictional characters are quick to turn personal, and are completely blown out of proportion in my mind.

I don’t really have a point here. This is mostly a self-conceited ramble about some experiences I’ve had. But some advice, which you are welcome to ignore if it’s not relevant: you are not a character on a screen. Any judgement of characters on screens are not a judgement of you as a person. And if it ever feels like it’s getting to you, go touch grass. Or open a window. Or - as my algebraic topology lecturer liked to say - drink a vat of gin. Whatever works for you.

[jacqcrisis]

This has been on my mind for months, I have to know please?

Does Caleb ever try it with a dude other than Zeke?

At the beginning I would've bet that he will have a phase where he mistakes his attraction to Zeke for just a passing curiosity for cock and try it with a random dude to, you know, "get it out of his system". Also, you have hinted so many times his gym buddies might having a thing for him, I wonder if he ever had / will ever have a drink too many at a party and hook up with one of them?

(feel free to ignore if the answer would be too much of a spoiler)

Okay, I've waited forever to answer this, thank you for your patience but it's finally relevant. Literally had this in my drafts for months and the reason is that it was supposed to be a bigger thing. So, spoilers from here on out if you haven't read chapter 17 I guess.

The plan from the beginning was that in this most recent chapter, we were going to go into detail on Caleb finally hooking up with random dudes who aren't Zeke. Initially, he deems experimenting with Zeke as safe in the fact that Zeke is so unconnected from his primary social circle that his toe dip into men would never get out to anyone who matters, so he hooks up with Zeke to satisfy that curiosity. And then by the time Caleb could've fucked other dudes, there wasn't much of a point. He likes Zeke, he likes sleeping with Zeke, and Zeke never turns him down (and he's got a big old crush on him, despite not admitting that), so why sleep with anyone else when the guy is right here and available to rock his shit whenever he wants?

Well, now sleeping with Zeke has caused a big ole problem, so we gotta stop that, but he still wants to sleep with men. Since he's finally in a place where he feels secure enough in his bisexuality and desperate enough to sleep with someone who isn't deemed as 'safe' that was going to be a thing we explored. There was going to be a whole ass half of a chapter where he and Viktor talk about their various foibles, Viktor reveals he's gay and he's a lot more resigned to the very thing that's giving Caleb all this trouble having already found a woman to marry, and Caleb was going to come out to him about be bi and then they were going to hook up.

But, I couldn't get it to work. The amount of time spent on that specifically felt unnecessary so now it's just a short opener and a few sentences later about how he did sleep with three random dudes and his friend. And I was going to initially wait till the chapter was out to answer this with a silly 'tee hee hee' since there was most of a chapter dedicated to its very premise literally what should have been a month away from when I received it yet here I stand, months later, a whole farm's worth of egg on my face.

So I want to apologize for how long I sat on this and also thank you for the ask!

[quicktimeeventfull]

💫🎈🤍!

hello isa!! thank you!!

💫 what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

i answered this here but i will provide a new fun answer also. i love when people let me know a fic has functioned on a practical level? like if they tell me it was easy to parse or that it made them think of xyz element in the source material or whatnot. i like this because it lets me know the fic actually did what it was meant to do -- it feels like having someone inform me i made a really airy meringue or something.

OFTEN i have found people leave these comments in a way that indicates they think i just stumbled onto the relevant effect by accident, which i often think is kind of funny but also enjoy bc i try very hard to make it look like getting a story to operate correctly was effortless. like ideally people shouldn't be able to see the work i put in for the same reason you don't want viewers thinking about the stage wires in a theatre production u know. 🎈describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? does it change? i feel i have a number of different styles i operate within. i am REALLY influenced by american modernism and french salon fairytales & i generally combine the two to varying degrees. re: french salon fairytales in particular -- i am specifically aiming for work that looks like it was dashed off without any particular thought, but it is INCREDIBLY hard to do hgjlfgh. i find it extremely rewarding but i've never written a story in this style that took less than three drafts. usually they take way more. i do not think it is always obvious when i'm going for this mode. like i think most people picked up on this in the things you tame but bridesmaid was also written almost entirely in this style and so are large portions of animal games. also just in general i do feel i have a somewhat older style of writing in terms of fic, which is my preference. i think it's fun! i like vintage fic. 🤍 what's one fic of yours you think people didn't "get"? sometimes it is not a bad thing when people don't "get" something and to this end i will say everyone seems to have a different interpretation of puppy dog and no one is correct. i really, really enjoy the interpretations that people have left comments about, though -- i think they all apprehend what was being conveyed, just not the extremely specific thing it was literally about. imo this is a good thing. i am choosing to be a little obscure about what the story is actually about but basically yes i am honestly really touched and happy with the various ways people are reading it. it is possibly the most personal piece i have written literally ever.

also i will provide an additional answer over on my 18+ blog ghjlhg (which is here for anyone interested)

[experi-sketches]

This or That Tag

I’ve had this sitting around for a little while, meant to get to it much sooner but you know how it goes 😅 I was tagged by @starlit-hopes-and-dreams​, thank you!!

(I may cheat on a few of these and pick both? Whoops!)

Historical or Futuristic

I couldn’t possibly choose. Right now I’m writing fantasy/historical, but this is my first long-format project with that setting. Typically I’ve always written stuff set in modern day or in the future. For reading, though, I tend to prefer historical settings!

Opening or Closing Chapter

So much easier to write the start of something than the end of something, imho lol. Especially if it’s a long project. The pressure to wrap everything up nicely and make it all feel like it went somewhere & meant something? That’s tough

Light and Fluffy or Dark and Gritty

Give me grit. Give me drama! I just can’t help it. I need characters who struggle, I need characters with tragic backstories, I need to make my protags walk through fire so that they come out stronger (and a little damaged??) on the other side! Light and fluffy has its place, but overall? Give me that grit. (I’ve always preferred dramas to comedies lol)

Animal Companion or Found Family

Found family. 100%. Found family is one of my absolute favorite themes in any media/art, so of course I love it in my own writing, too 😂

Horror or Romance

I’m not really a big fan of horror as a genre, I just don’t gravitate towards it. I typically don’t do romance as a genre, either, but I love a good romance happening alongside the main plot. (For writing or reading.) Mmm.

Hard Magic System or Soft Magic System

This one is too hard to pick. It really depends on the story, I think? I love writing & reading both, so long as it’s done well for the story it’s in.

Stand-alone or Series

Series, all the way. I think I’m physically incapable of writing short-format things, it always ends up ballooning into a larger project. The same goes for reading - I really enjoy getting to know characters, and one novel just isn’t enough!

One Project at a Time or Always Juggling 2+

Again, I think I’m physically incapable of dividing my attention between multiple projects. I get so obsessed with whatever I’m working on that I can’t move on to something else until it’s done. To those of you out there who juggle multiple stories, I applaud you. I have no idea how you do it 😭

One Award Winner or One Best Seller

At the end of the day, I think the reason most of us share what we write is so that other people can appreciate it. I’m not out here trying to write a masterpiece. I just write what I like to write because I enjoy it, and I want (hope) other folks enjoy it too.

Fantasy or Sci-Fi

This one is very similar to the historical/futuristic one above - I’m currently writing fantasy and I love it, but overall? I love both and couldn’t possibly choose one over the other.

Character Description or Setting Description

So I feel like this one is calling me out a little bit lol. I tend to go ham on describing a setting (I know, I’m working on it, okay? 😅) but I often keep character descriptions basic. I only tell the reader the most relevant/necessary details of a character’s appearance. I feel that 9 times out of 10 a reader gets a few details & then constructs their own mental image of the character anyways, and then it’s quite jarring to have that image disrupted/altered. Besides, I just enjoy describing places 😂

First Draft or Final Draft

Oh gosh, I would never post a first draft anywhere on the internet. Mine are always a disaster. Although to be fair I’m not sure I’ve ever posted a “final draft” either - I can always go back and do more revision lol

Leaving no-pressure tags for @burntcoffeewhump​ @pierrotwrites-hc​ @dont-touch-my-soup​ @i-can-even-burn-salad​ & also leaving as an open tag!

[good-realtor-bad-realtor-dynamic]

I finally caught up with Succession over the course of this week. In fact, I literally finished S3E9 a few hours ago and I'm still completely thunderstruck.

I actually started season one a few weeks ago but struggled getting past the first few episodes. I reckon it took the writers a few episodes to settle on the tone of the show, to hone in on the correct balance between comedy and drama, and to identify the strengths of their cast so they could write them into the characters.

Once I made it to S1E6 though, I was hooked, and by season two, I was laughing, sobbing, seething and getting my heart broken, all in equal measure, because somehow showrunner Jesse Armstrong had managed to elevate the stories, the dialogue and the characters, and somehow Jeremy Strong had found new and interesting ways to complicate his portrayal of Ken, the only financebro sonofabillionaire loser on tv to have ever broken me, before his brother Rome joined the club, by reaching heretofore undiscovered depths in Pathetic Failure acting...

I was so ready for season three to fall short of the standards set by its predecessor, but it didn't. It may have been slow going in the middle for a bit there, but by the end, all I can think is what a ride. I don't know how it matched them, perhaps even exceeded them, but it did. At the beginning of this season, "Relevant Donuts" planted the idea that what we really want is to see the siblings together on the same side, taking down their father. So when the season finale finally pays that off, and we start to feel hopeful even a little proud of our trio for overcoming their father's machinations, only to have the rug pulled out from under us all in that Godfather betrayal — I'm still reeling. It was not shocking that Tom would do that, given everything he'd been put through, but I'm still shocked. And that is some brilliant writing.

I fully understand now why Charlie and Glenn were so in awe of Matthew Macfadyen's acting range and his seemless transitions from the most ridiculous comedy to most affecting drama (in a conversation from one of those early video episodes of the Sunny podcast). I've only known him from his fantastic performance as Mr Darcy in the 2005 Pride and Prejudice film, and Tom Wambsgans couldn't be further away from that role.

I have so many thoughts about how charming yet sneaky and two-faced Greg the Egg was all along, how that social climbing nature was developed, and how fascinating his dynamic with Tom is, especially as a parallel to the Tom/Shiv marriage. I despise everything that people like Shiv and Roman stand for and yet I can't help feeling so sorry for them as they stand before their father, looking for his love and approval, only to be ruthlessly dismissed, used and humiliated. I don't remember the last time I hated a character more than I do Logan Roy for his manipulative behaviour and the cruel ways he makes his children compete for his affection while claiming to act from a place of paternal benevolence. I can't say enough about Kendall, Siobhan, Roman, Tom, Greg, Logan, Gerri, Frank, Marcia, Hugo and just the whole bloody cast of characters and actors on this show.

As always, the "Jesse Armstrong and Armando Iannucci Uncomfortable Satirical Comedy Universe" of shows and films about fucked-up people, usually in positions of power, does not miss. I'm going to try not to be very annoying about this on my Sunny blog, but hey, it's my blog, so I might actually, at least in the near future since season four is nearly upon us. But I'm also a lazy bastard who hates hitting Post on their drafts. So who knows.

Anyway, I'm likely going to be the obnoxious friend who quotes this show like I do with Sunny and The Sopranos with my mates all the time now. It's already begun irl and I don't think I'll be able to stop anytime soon.

Excuse me while I go down a rabbit-hole of videos featuring the writers and cast of this show now. Maybe Jesse Armstrong will somewhere explain his brain to me.

[made-nondescript]

the thing that always draws me right back in is the ambiguity of what the song is even specifically ABOUT. like in particular, why does the narrator leave Simon?

while talking to Simon he gives the reason that:

I don't know but I sure don't believe in this life I mean it's perfect, but it isn't real

Prior to that, we get the lead in to this interaction where the narrator tells Simon he's leaving:

Well, we got away Boy we got away You know our lives will change At least for us life was changed But one year is gone But one year is gone

(INFO: Most lyric sites will say the last lyric is "But no one is gone," but this neither makes sense nor is it what it sounds like they're saying. Sadly there are no official lyrics on Bandcamp or elsewhere)

Why is it important that one year was gone? And what had they fled? My immediate thought is always dodging some sort of draft or war, hence why, "at least for us life was changed." But there's not really anything else resembling war imagery prior to this especially given that the narrator and Simon were apparently globe trotting prior to settling down. A war is also not mentioned as a reason to leave home; rather, it sounds like Simon just wanted to leave his mom, see the world, and he dragged the narrator with him.

And here we hit on another thing so important to this song about me: it's so queer.

Simon and our narrator travel the world together, moving until they "find [a place] worth staying" to "fashion [their] own little home." Simon and the narrator clearly care for each other deeply, both extremely reluctant to leave each other. Simon "cries" that the narrator will "change his mind" should he leave, and the narrator feels that if he lingers too long, he will change his mind and come right on back.

Perhaps what they were leaving behind, and what they found where ever they settled down, was a place more accepting of their relationship. The phrasing Simon says to tell his mom why he's leaving is even about how "the world is full of arms dying to receive [him]" and she cries that she can "change."

Was it internalized shame that drove the narrator to leave? Was what he had with Simon too indulgent, too perfect, and too unlike the "real" relationships he was meant to pursue?

It's such a compelling scene. The narrator stood with his back to Simon, his hand in his pocket rubbing anxiously away at the ink on his plane ticket. Just thirty feet behind is the man he loves, sitting at what was their table, coffee half drunk. Eyes boring into him. The narrator walking away, then running because if he doesn't run he knows he'll turn right back around. His mind will change. But it can't.

Though compelling, this is almost certainly not the intent (though, who cares about that). But it also just kind of leaves something to be desired for the narrator's motivation. It feels like it can't be so simple. Some other factor, or something...

Which brings us to one additional thing I find really interesting:

The uhh. I don't know music words, but sort of like the lyrical through line of the song is sung three times: once when Simon's mother is begging him to stay, once when Simon is begging the narrator to stay, and one final time at the song's conclusion when the narrator is trying to steel himself to not turn right back around. In every instance, it is Simon causing or urging someone else to change.

Also the song beginning with Simon leaving his mother, and than the narrator leaving Simon... Was Simon difficult to love too? This line feels especially relevant:

This is exactly what you knew you'd have to deal with So keep walking or better yet run

It's definitely not a smoking gun. Just, I dunno. I feel deeply that Simon is not entirely guiltless, though I don't have textual evidence to support me on this one. Just... Feeling it in my heart here

in summary i am so normal about the blasting company come closer

I am once again a little bit insane about the Petrojvic Blasting Company's "Simon Was" . oopsie

[tittyblade]

tumblr etiquette 101

a list that is nowhere near exhaustive, from yours truly.

First off, welcome! Whether you’re a twitter veteran looking for anything but whatever twitter is, or a new user just done signing up, glad to see you in our ranks beloveds! Welcome home. Refer to this quick tour to make sure your fandom experience (or tumblr experience in general) is a positive one!

Disclaimer: I know it’s long, but please try to read or skim through til the end if you’re new here! This is by no means meant to be a rule book (for the most part lol), only a guide to help you get settled easier!

1) Your blog

This is where people will see and interact with you, so put some effort into it!

Try to choose a name (url) that’s simple. You can see it as your brand, it’s how people will perceive you and remember you. If you’d like to interact with other users here (and not use the site just for the content) it’s better to have something short and sweet, preferably without spaces. (Of course, these are only suggestions.) Rest assured, you can change it literally any time you want.

Have a theme. Utilize the tool that lets you edit your blog’s color or the font of your bio! You can make it match your profile picture, or your blog if it has a theme of its own. Make it feel homey :]

Fill in your bio. People will be checking out your profile probably more often than you think. Don’t leave it empty! Put in any information you’re comfortable with sharing and isn’t too personal (like your age if you’re a minor, or other TMI that can be found on other people’s carrds). It’s always better to add a name/nickname people can use to refer to you by, but feel free to use your blog description to shitpost still.

You can have an intro post. More often than not, you’ll see a blog have a pinned post, a post permanently appearing at the top of a blog until you pin another post or unpin it. You can make one of those, if you’d like to introduce yourself in more length, link any other socials or a carrd, and show others visiting your blog how you tag things so it’ll be easy for them to navigate. Not an obligation.

Keep your anonymity and your safety. It should go without saying, but there’s no harm in repeating it just in case. Your comfort, privacy and safety has the utmost importance. Don’t share any information you don’t want to. Don’t share your age if you’re a minor, or any other incredibly personal info. I’d encourage you to go by a nickname that’s not your real name, (blog name, your brand, remember?) since there’s safety in anonymity, and that’s lowkey one of the big deals of tumblr, but that’s up to you still.

Choose what you want to be visible. Your liked posts and who you follow are all things you can set to keep to yourself and hide from the publics eye, how handy! You should go through all the setting while you’re at it, set it to your comfort.

Side blogs are a thing. You can have multiple blogs that you can use for different things (see: different fandoms, art blog, etc) to keep them organized or away from your followers. Just remember that the replies and off-anon asks you send will be from your main blog, as well as where you follow other blogs from.

2) Interacting with others

You’ve set up your account, now comes the fun part!

Follow to your heart’s desire. If you care about others seeing who you follow, fear not! In tumblr, usually only two types of blogs keep their following visible to others: newbies, and big blogs using it to point people on other good blogs’ direction. Just turn it off, and go ham following people.

Customize your dashboard. Gonna mention just two things here: this is another reason why it’s really important that you follow blogs without sparing, your dash will collect dust otherwise; and you should turn off “best stuff first” in your dashboard settings, to have a better community here and all.

Follow tags. You can set it in your settings that posts with your followed tags appear on your dashboard.

You can check the og post for edits and context. When you see a reblogged post you don’t understand the context of (or don’t recognize the character in case of fanarts), click on the profile so it will take you to the original post. From there you can check the original poster’s tags to get the context, or see if there have been any edits made to the post, since when you edit a post it doesn’t update any past reblogs.

Send people asks... This is how you make mutuals, people! Do it off-anon if you’d like them to know your blog, or anon if you’d rather not! (You can still end your messages with a signature to show you’re the same person, -[name] is one example.) Send them nice messages, ask their opinion on something, discuss things, or just straight up shitpost lol. Go wild. The sky’s your limit and it’s definitely more than 280 characters.

...and let them ask you! You can set your preference in the settings, do it on desktop tumblr to access more settings tho! What you can customize on mobile is limited (like letting people ask you things anonymously, that’s only on desktop settings). In my personal opinion, it’s always better to tag their username (or a nickname you give them, if they’re a friend) on that post, since you wouldn’t want your interactions with your friends to get buried in your blog forever.

Comment on posts. If you have something to say but don’t want the post to appear on your blog you can add a comment. The owner of the post will get a notif for it, but for anyone else you need to tag them.

For the love of god, reblog. People will only see your liked posts if you have it visible to public and they specifically go on your blog to look at them. You like something? You reblog. It’s already hard for posts to circulate properly, if you don’t reblog them literally no one will see them. If not for anything do it for the artists. Just hold and drag on mobile to fast rb.

3) Your Posts

Finally here! Don’t be a lurker, post and engage!

Make use of “read more”. If your post is long, add it. That’s what you clicked on earlier to expand this post. On desktop leave an empty line and you’ll see three dots appear, and on mobile type :readmore: on that empty line.

Draft a post to come back to it later. Pretty self explanatory.

Queue your post. Whether it’s your own post or you’re reblogging, make use of the queue feature to a) not spam reblog and fill up the dashboard of people following you and b) keep your blog active while you’re gone. Mess around in the settings, it’s fairly easy to set up.

Schedule your post. Same as queueing, the only difference is you get to choose the exact time your post will go up. Handy if you want to schedule a post for certain dates like april fools, or 5 years in the future for some reason. 

Format your texts. You can do all kinds of fancy stuff here (that’s a link, try pressing on it). Twitter doesn’t have this, make use of it. Changes depending on whether you’re on mobile or desktop. (Desktop has less features.)

Check your stats. If you’re trying to understand the algorithm better or want to look at some pretty graphs you can get your data on that on desktop tumblr.

@ people in comments. You’ll get all the notifs when people comment on your posts but they won’t see your reply unless you tag them in your message.

4) Tags, and tagging a post

This is where my earlier statement “this isn’t a rule book” stops being applicable. It’s not a war crime to go against these, I won’t come chasing you (don’t take my word for this) but you’ll work up a bad rep. Just saying lol.

Do NOT crosstag posts. It’s really tempting to add unrelated tags to increase your posts’ interaction, I know, but that’s not what tumblr is about. Don’t be a dick and make other communities’ experience worse for them.

Always tag your posts with “crit/critical/discourse/etc” if it calls for it. There’s no exceptions to it. This is the reason you see people migrating to tumblr. Let people enjoy things.

Don’t main tag a critical/negative post. If your crit post is about “Thing”, you add the “Thing critical” tag, but not the “Thing” tag. People block crit tags if they don’t want to see it, don’t shove it in their faces by main tagging it. 

If you don’t want to see something, just block it. Another reason why people are able to survive on tumblr. You don’t start discourse, you don’t make call-outs, you block. You can find something for every community you can think of if you go looking for it. The worst of the worst probably won’t ever appear on your dash, but if you’re worried or feel the need for it, you know where the block button is.

Feel free to shitpost or ramble. More often than not you’ll see people rb a post with a comment, and their elaboration will be in the tags. The tags are only visible on your profile and the notifications of the owner of the og blog. Just a thing people do.

Reblog artists’ posts with nice comments in the tags! Commenting on a drawing is usually done through the tags (Not an obligation, again, just a thing people do. Feel free to add your comment on the rb itself if you’d want other people to see it tho!) and leave nice messages for the artists! It’s a win-win for everyone involved. 

If you have more than a single follower, always use the common tw warning tags. You don’t need to tw everything, but tw’ing some common things is the bare minimum human decency. Keep it safe for others. 

Tag a post “long post” if it’s really long. Pretty self explanatory. Don’t make people scroll through all that please lol. 

You can use them to organize your blog. This is more of a pro tip, if you’d like to not miss a post in your blog, cause they will start pilin’ up soon enough.

#Liveblogging is pretty fun. If you’d like to talk to people during streams, don’t forget to add the relevant tags still! Again, you won’t show up on people’s dash otherwise.

Whew! That got out of hand. Hopefully I didn’t bore you too much. Check out blogs like @heritageposts and @hellsite-hall-of-fame to honor our past o7. @mcytblr-hall-of-fame too maybe :eyes:. Anyways, don’t forget the most important rule of them all:

Enjoy your stay! You’re meant to have fun on here while also making friends (if that’s your thing). Just be kind and respectful of others, you’ll get the hang of the rest! <3

[dailyadventureprompts]

Hi Dapper, This is more of a game mechanics advice question, if you have any thoughts... You’ve suggested a few naval themed, or at least travel themed adventures. How do you run Ship based campaigns (either naval ships or air ships)? I guess, focusing on combat or encounters, rather than just travelling.

I know there are various official and unofficial rule sets, but none of these feel “right” to me. I think because, in all other respects, 5e is so individual-character focused. Most ship rules tend to remove “the character” and focus on the ship or crew as a single mass. Players aren’t rolling for their character anymore, and in some rule sets, the “captain” is singularly rolling for everyone.

I understand ships are big, and historical naval combat involves hundreds of sailors spread over hours, but this runs counter to the general vibe of the game (most rpgs, actually) that focus on a handful of PC heroes as “stars of the show.” As a result, jumping over to these more anonymising rules always feels awkward to me.

How have you navigated this discrepancy, and what things have you found to work (or to avoid)?

Drafting the Adventure: Naval Combat & Encounter Design

SUCH a good question, so thanks for writing in!

I think the discrepancy you've pointed out actually underlies a lot of what's wrong with 5e combat, in that the simple mechanical systems we are given tend to be boring when they're left to their own devices. The thing that the developers really should impress on everyone learning to run 5e gams is that these systems AREN'T supposed to be left on their own, they're supposed to be a simple framework over which you place challenges of batshit bravery/ skill and epic setpieces, which is apparently a thing we need to all learn on our own through trial and error, sacrificing the fun of our sessions in the process.

First, a note on encounter design:

Think of a default "at sea" naval encounter like a fight in a generic 20x20ft dungeon room: yes the party gets to show off their abilities, but once you've gone through one of these sorts of combats, every other "vanilla" encounter is going to seem almost rote, an exercise in tedium. Likewise, if you throw your party's vessel against another vessel in a generic void of sea/sky/aetherspace, you're going to run into the same problem: relying on a less than stellar mechanical system until it breaks under the pressure of trying to maintain the fun at the table all on its own.

It all comes down to encounter design, you as the DM picturing what you think would be a fun/cool/exciting action sequence, and then setting up the narrative stakes, mechanics, and enemies to facilitate that. I'd say that there's a lost art to encounter design, but it's not so much lost as untaught: when the prevailing wisdom is that the party should be having 5-7 encounters PER DAY, then gives us little in the way of rules or ideas about making those encounters spicy, its no wonder we end up churning out a bunch of boring filler content.

Think of it like a movie production team, be it a writer, director, actor, or props department: anyone would struggle making 5-7 unique action scenes, when that energy could all be focused on making one scene 5-7 times as good. Translating that back into DM relevant information, focus on making fewer, more interesting encounters rather than trying to cram in as many as possible, you only have so much time and creative juice to utilize between sessions so make sure it goes where its most needed. These encounters don't need to be biggest, most epic things ever, they just need to be unique and push the story along regardless of whether your party wins or loses.

My thoughts on building those unique encounters and how to really Jazz up ship to ship combat under the cut.

How to choose the right encounters:

The first thing to do is throw out every notion given to you by the DMG about how many encounters an adventure needs to have, and anything regarding rolling for random encounters while traveling. Random encounters are an artifact of grindheavy JRPGs and the earlier editions where fights were simple, deadly, and over in a few dice throws. 5e breaks if played like that, so you shouldn't attempt to do so. Instead, have an encounter whenever it's right for there to be an encounter, when you think you've prepped a good one that fits with the rhythm of the story, something that feels like it will challenge them, and something that will have a bearing on the plot regardless of what the final outcome is.

Next, when plotting your encounters you need to consider the different goals involved in the narrative you’re spinning:  what are your party attempting to do and how does this encounter impede them? Sure you can have a generic “pirates/seamonsters attack because we haven’t had a fight in a while” sort of encounter, but those are just as boring narratively as the fight in the 20x20ft room is mechanically. Such generic battle should only be the setup for other, more interesting mechanical scenarios, such as the pirates having a strange artifact in their hold, or the seamonster’s venom poisoning somebody and potentially forcing the party to divert course in favor of seeking aid. 

Variety is your friend here so consider implementing chases, stealth runs, standoffs, and navigation challenges to frame your usual combats. These can be spaced out with social encounters to provide exposition and tension, or vignettes of how the crew is managing. I’ve actually been fond of using a “captian’s log” style framing device to breeze over repetitive maritime travel, highlighting scenes and detailing their aftermath without having to repeatedly describe the routine process of working on a ship. 

Improving Naval Combat

You’re completely accurate in that most tabletop systems are very bad at portraying naval combat, but mostly because they tend to try to run ship-actions in the same way they’d run a multi-character skirmish.  Instead, do away with your traditional initiative system and have both (or all) side stake their turns simultaneously in the following rhythm: Planning, execution, resolution. Which make the early rounds of naval combat work out sorta like a game of rock paper scissors, all chance and intuition

Planning: During the planning phase, have your party talk freely about what they should do, representing your crew feeding information back n forth and adapting to the situation at hand. At the end of the planning phase, they agree (or the captain decides) what to do, which is executed during the next phase.  Simultaneously, you as the DM determine what the opposing vessels are going to do during their execution phase, without any foreknowledge of what the party might be about to attempt. 

Execution: the ships move, and the actions chosen by their crew trigger. This prevents all the weirdness brought about by trying to run constantly moving vehicles in turn order. 

Resolution: Damage is tallied, the results of skillchecks are meted out, and the party gets an ongoing report of what the hell is happening. 

I call this system “ the Approach” and it represents the actions of the vessels involved in a more zoomed out time frame and scale that allows for actual positioning, or navigation around reefs, atolls, or inlets, as any good fight should have a proportionally interesting backdrop, if only for variety’s sake. 

Once one vessel has closed with another in a step I call “The Engagement”, you can use the d&d naval rules, with characters either acting as their role on the crew or their player character. rolling initiative and carrying out the fight as normal. Here’re a few tricks I’ve learned for making these closing segments interesting: 

Keeping things interesting during a naval fight is a matter of juggling the fight between the ships themselves and what’s happening on the party’s vessel. A LOT can go wrong on a ship, and its up to those characters without primary ship roles to deal with things like fires breaking out, holes punched in the hull, vital equipment like cannons malfunctioning, crew being injured and needing to be escorted to the infirmary. Throw at least one of these complications at the party each time they have a close engagement, and you’ll give ‘em more than enough to chew on every time they have a fight on the high seas. 

Just about every ship battle outside of a seamonster attack or massive military engagement is going to involve a boarding action, which can transition the fight from one of positioning and potshots with cannons to an impromptu siege. 

Again, its important to consider motivation: Loot hungry pirates may send a secondary looting force into the ship’s cargo hold while keeping the defenders busy on topdeck, forcing the party to divide their attention. Privateers or slavers may focus on attacks that prevent the enemy ships from escaping, encouraging the party to run around putting out (sometimes literal) fires.  When enemies are working in groups, their initial goal may only be to slow the party down while waiting for reinforcements to arrive in a separate boarding ship, overwhelming them with numbers. 

Just like with every other encounter, its important to consider what happens to your party when things go badly. Stress that Surrender is an option, but consider that happens to your party and their crew when that happens: are they imprisoned? marooned? left with no cargo and just enough supplies to get to the next port?  What are their patron/creditors going to say when they come back with an empty hold and excuses? Perhaps the most dramatic thing you could do is have them shipwrecked, killing off the majority of their crew and leaving them stranded somewhere to figure it all out. This should be saved for the turning point of a campaign, as it kicks them back do zero and may sour them on ever venturing out onto the seas again. 

[oreoambitions]

Previous Draft // Ao3

The courthouse doors open with a bang, and the sound of conversation tumbles out of the atrium and onto the courthouse steps. Security flanks Lena on either side, two uniformed bodies ahead to break the crowd, two behind to keep it from closing in around her. Lena keeps her head up, confident in the knowledge that she will appear to take this all in stride. In truth, she crosses the atrium in a sort of daze.

There are moments in a person’s life when time sticks and stutters, moments that linger beyond their natural boundaries, that creep and haunt and niggle at the mind. As she steps out through the courthouse doors, she understands that this is one of them. Time hesitates for her even as she passes into the chaos of lights and cameras outside, towards the waiting crowd of journalists shouting over one another in a fashion not conducive to anyone’s questions ever actually getting answered.

For an instant she’s back on the witness stand: the defense is demanding Supergirl’s name, and the judge is not intervening; the words I plead the fifth are heavy on her lips. That moment has passed, and it hasn’t. There will be ripples. All Lena can do about it now is try to keep those ripples to a minimum, for Kara’s sake; she must say nothing to anyone until they’ve had a chance to talk alone.

“Ms. Luthor.” 

The officer at her side encourages her forward, not quite touching her back with one hovering hand. Lena realizes with a start that she’s paused halfway down the courthouse steps. At the bottom, Supergirl drops out of the sky in a dramatic, press pleasing fashion. That soft warm smile is another echo of the courtroom, and Lena is reminded that Kara intentionally slipped out of the courthouse another way and circled back for the cameras. Lena has, rather uncharacteristically, committed a critical error in a critical moment, and now Kara is covering for her with theatrics.

It’s working. The cameras turn on Kara as Lena makes it down the last few steps and into her waiting embrace.

“I’m sorry,” she begins, half stumbling as Kara pulls her close, closer than usual, one hand hot at the back of her neck.

Kara turns her shoulder to shield Lena from the bulk of the cameras. “Not here,” she murmurs, so low that Lena is almost not certain she’s heard it. And then Kara pulls back, not quite far enough, and Lena is acutely and self-consciously aware of the sound of camera shutters snapping all around them, the closeness of Kara’s body, the gut wrenching feeling that the eyes of the nation are on them and the stage lights are all lit up and she doesn’t know her lines.

The judge should have intervened. Her mind keeps catching on that point, on the heavy pause in the courtroom, Kara’s expressionless face, the pounding of her own heart, the irrelevance of the question. It feels as though if she stays in that moment long enough, pictures it clearly enough, the judge will step in and this story will play out another way.

Time, of course, does not work like that. It stutters and sticks only in her mind, while in the real world the press clamors and Kara’s cape flutters in the quickening wind. 

“I’m so proud of you,” Kara is saying, her voice pitched so that the waiting journalists might catch words that, God willing, sound hollow to Lena’s ears only. “You were amazing in there.”

Lena is thinking about what the headlines are going to say tomorrow. Luthor and Super: Partners in More Than Crimefighting. Or perhaps, Luthor Makes False Marriage Claim on Witness Stand, Investigation to Follow.

Kara cups Lena’s face with one hand, and she snaps back to reality. She has about half a breath to catch up with what’s happening before Kara is closing the distance between them, and she hates to be a walking cliche, but oh. This is not how she has imagined their first kiss might go - not that she’s ready to admit to anyone except maybe Sam that she’s imagined their first kiss at all - and for a sickening second she feels nothing but regret. But then Kara’s lips are on hers, softer than her imagination has ever accounted for, and Lena is melting into her, kissing her back just at the edge of what might be considered chaste.

It’s an act, of course. If Lena’s heart flutters where she knows perfectly well Kara can hear it, can feel it, that’s just the nerves of the whole situation. Kara is, after all, kissing her on the mouth right there in front of God and everybody, shutters clicking all around them, reporters laughing and cheering in the background. It’s not unreasonable to feel a little something; her secret is still safe.

When Kara breaks the kiss, Lena chases after her mouth, and not for show. There’s that soft smile again, lipstick a little smudged, and perhaps she’s imagining things but Kara’s eyes seem warmer than they did before. 

Kara drops a second kiss onto Lena’s forehead. “Can I take you home?” she asks, her voice still pitched for the journalists on the steps.

“Please,” Lena replies. 

She tucks herself back into Kara’s chest as strong arms close around her. If anyone asks, it’s for the cameras. There’s a car waiting for her, and a driver who will have to be well compensated for the waste of his time, but it’s better if the press sees that she and Supergirl are leaving together, isn’t it? And nothing could be more memorable, more pressworthy, than flight.

And, Lena thinks, it’s better because, selfishly, she wants to prolong this moment of closeness. She wants to soak it all in: Kara’s smell, the brush of her hair across Lena’s cheek, the preparatory breath before takeoff. This is the moment Lena wishes would slow down for her, just this last moment when she can imagine to herself that what happened in the courtroom was a bad dream of little consequence, and that nothing between her and Kara will ever have to change.

///

Kara does not take Lena home. They fly instead over the wide arc of National City’s suburbs and into the foothills, and from there a little further still until they’ve reached the mountains above the city. Kara deposits them in a valley on the leeward side of a low peak dotted half with shrubbery and half with scraggled conifers, the names of which Lena has to admit she does not know. She rubs feeling and warmth back into her arms and resists the urge to ask where they are while Kara paces, the agitation and anxiety in the lines of her body a clear departure from the soft warmth on display outside the courthouse. When she rounds on Lena, it feels like the inevitable fruition of Lena’s mistakes.

“You told them we were married? Lena!”

“Technically I didn’t use those words.”

“Oh okay, so between my wife and my priest, which role did you think the court was going to assume you were alluding to?”

“What was I supposed to say? They had me backed into a corner.”

“It wasn’t relevant to the case! This was about Lilian. It had nothing to do-”

“It doesn’t matter that it wasn’t relevant, because the judge wasn’t intervening. I just- I panicked. I had to say something. I wasn’t going to lie under oath, and even if I were willing, what could I have said? Should I have thrown out some other name, thrown someone else under the bus? And what then, when it became obvious to the nation that I’d lied-”

“Oh, and you thought this was better? What are you going to say when they want proof? There’s no documentation. There was no wedding to document. Supergirl doesn’t exist as a legal entity, you can’t just-”

“Kara, I-”

“It’s just not like you not to think things through.”

They stand there staring at one another, Kara’s jaw clenched, Lena’s arms crossed tight across her chest. The sun is going to go down soon; Lena is already shivering a little in the shadow of the mountain. This is a mess, and it’s a mess of her own making, and she doesn’t know how to unmake it out here in the gathering dark.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I could have - I should have refused to answer. But then they’d have held me in contempt and thrown me in prison. And I’m willing to go to prison for you, Kara, believe me, but then you’d have broken me out because you’re a beautiful idiot, and where would that leave us?”

Kara’s mouth twitches up a little at the corners, and then she laughs outright. “I would have,” she admits. “What a mess that would be.”

“I know I messed up,” Lena offers.

“You were trying to protect me.” Kara scuffs one boot in the dirt. “They’ll try to hit you with perjury charges; you know they will. You might wind up in prison at the end of this anyway.”

Lena nods. She does know this. Some part of her knew it the moment the words I plead the fifth left her mouth, and yet, everything she’s protested to Kara is true. Those words were the only road open to her so long as that judge remained silent.

“Well,” Lena says, “You don’t grow up in the Luthor household without learning a thing or two about the loopholes of the legal system. Burden of proof lies with the prosecution; it would be very difficult to prove that a wedding didn’t happen.”

Kara tsks and turns on her heel to stare out over the valley. “Supergirl isn’t a legal entity. They could challenge you on the grounds that you can’t be legally married to someone who doesn’t legally exist. And if they found a judge more sympathetic to Lex than to you….”

“Not a difficult thing to find,” Lena admits. She stands in the fear and the evening chill for a long moment “I meant what I said, Kara. If I go to prison over this, so be it. Anything to protect you.” Anything for the woman I love, she wants to say, but Kara isn’t ready for that. Might never be ready for that. And neither, truthfully, is Lena.

Kara’s fingers have found the edge of her cape, and now she’s worrying at it in the fading light. She doesn’t look back at Lena for what feels like a long time, and when she does her expression is guarded. “I want you to promise me you’re going to hear me out before you say anything.”

“Okay….” Lena says. She tries to wrestle down her questions, her curiosities, her reservations. Anything for Kara, after all.

Kara takes a deep breath, looking for all the world like she’s readying herself to make a national address. “I have a terrible idea.”

[thehiddenbaroness]

Baroness' General Writing Tips, Part I

I decided to finally start compiling little (and big) things I've learnt over the 20+ years I've been compulsively recreationally putting one word in front of the other; I hope it's helpful or at least reassuring!

While much of this is slanted toward fiction, a lot of it applies to nonfiction as well. I've also gone for more general tips this go round. You're welcome to pick my brain about specific topics and I'll do my best to answer.

The key thing to remember is that this is what I have personally found helpful; they may have more or less degrees of usefulness or relevance to you personally, but they can still serve as starting points. Part II

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(1) Your method is your method...

This goes for whether you plan ahead or just roll with it, but also things like when/where you write.

(2) ...but discipline and practice will help you do the heavy lifting.

At some point the difference in your personal skill plateaus is down to how often you write regardless of your mood, knowledge of where it's going, or perceived skill. Persistence will be your strongest ally during the inevitable droughts and valleys of self-doubt.

(3) Reading is good and helpful...

Read widely, read deep. Learn from the successes and mistakes of others. Learn what you want to emulate and what you want to avoid. Broaden your perspective, take note of different techniques, build your knowledge base. Train your discernment. Likewise, back-reading your own material to see where you left off can be useful if you struggle with consistency / sticking to the point. (4) ...but don't let it distract or saturate. Sometimes, back-reading your own work can scratch the itch you had to work on something and you end up not writing new material. This can happen with others' work in a related genre/field -- it scratches the itch you had for that type of content, or conversely you begin unhelpful comparisons between their work and yours.

Most of all, you will need to learn the difference between being inspired by something and mimicking it to the point of plagiarism.

(5) Learn to take a break, not to quit. If you feel a piece truly isn't working, don't let your first response be to give up on it. Put it away for a while and come back to it, then maybe try, for example, a different angle or point of view. (6) Light immersion in related media helps with burnout while still being useful. Sometimes writing isn't going to be the most helpful thing to do. You will always need to replenish your creative batteries, but sometimes this can feel like avoidance or laziness -- it isn't. Browse concept art. Sketch. Work on some worldbuilding that'll never make it in. Visit a museum. Listen to an audiobook in your genre. Watch a documentary on the same topic.

(7) Your first draft is just that -- a draft. Be open-minded and forgiving, and embrace the process. The most important thing in this stage is to get content on the page, because you can't do anything without it. Trust your gut and let the words flow how they want.

(8) There is immense opportunity in the editing process... Often the best breakthroughs come through asking questions during your editing. The answers can forge new links or callbacks, or open up new avenues for plot, or enrich what's already there. Editing isn't pass/fail -- it's a conversation. (9) ...but don't be a forever-editor. Perfectionism is the enemy. Nothing will ever be perfect to you -- accept that sooner rather than later -- but it will be perfect to someone out there. Yet they'll never see it if you don't let the project out into the world. (10) Read it aloud. No matter your experience, this will inevitably catch clunky sentences, weak pacing, and even sub-par semantics. It's very important to do this with dialogue so that it sounds natural.

(11) Accept you belong in the writerly ecosystem just as you are.

There's three aspects to this: first, that everyone feels like an imposter at some point and probably will in the future, regardless of their experience or how much they have published. Second, that there are no new ideas, but your telling will always be new. And third, that you remain a writer if you haven't written for years or struggle to jot down a sentence a week just as much as if you churn out a book a year. Don't let these things hold you back.