#for the people who have never read my oc babbles before
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if-loki-was-a-fox · 3 months ago
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The differences in cultures and behaviors between different fandoms is so fascinating to me, I love just musing on the various differences
Back in my Warrior Cats phase on scratch there was barely an single fanart of canon characters, everything was original characters and original clans.
During my time in the Genshin Impact fandom people would play with the various canon character elements to make new characters but there wasn't quite the level of wholly divorced from canon stories there.
There was shipping tho! An absolutely unhinged amount of shipping. Every single character who wasn't a literal child had at least one, maybe two default/mainstream ship partners that most people shipped them with, then a handful of rarer ships as well
Then I moved to Dream SMP 'cus I heard that it had a lot of platonic relationships that were so popular that they made it into the top 100 ao3 ships multiple years in a row, and I was getting pretty romanced out by Genshin at that point so it seemed like a perfect choice.
And it was! Dream SMP had the best platonic relationship representation of any fandom I've been in before or since. But it has the dark flipside to it, where the reason was partially because the fans were freaking off the rails toxic and hostile to the mere suggestion that any character might ever be attracted to another
The Hermitcraft and Life Series are better with platonic relationships than Genshin Impact, but nowhere near as good as DSMP, with the return of a handful of mainstream ships, but not the pressure to have a ship for every single character
Then there's the fascinating ways MCYT fandoms had every characters' designs and even species up in the air and it's common place to just make any random guy part any random animal, which is incredible fun
But then OCs in the MCYT fandom are a whole other thing, as they tend to come most in the Warriors style where they come out of fanmade servers and tend to be fairly divorced from canon most of the time, only generally inspired by the setting
And now in the Magnus Archives fandom we've got the canon ships, with one specific one vastly dominating the whole fandom to even more extremes than any singular Genshin ship ever reached, which I've gathered is a pretty common experience in other fandoms but this has been my first time actually experiencing it first hand
And TMA has a similar thing with Warrior Cats where it works really well as a set of world building that can be shoved upon other fictional characters for some fun AUs, which was never really a thing with MCYT (though I think it kinda was with Genshin Impact, to a degree, where people would draw other characters in Genshin splash art style and assign them Visions and all that.)
Warriors is by far the most extreme of these, up with My Little Pony in terms of how you're almost guaranteed to see at least one fanart of the characters in any fandom drawn as warrior cats/ponies
And then there's the popular AU types! Genshin Impact was chock full of highschool AUs. Dream SMP had Foster Family AUs and Superhero AUs galore (especially with SBI), but it also had a smaller Humans Are Space Orcs / Alien AUs phenomen that I've not been able to find again in my other fandoms since. I never read enough Life Series and Hermitcraft fanfic to get a good grasp on their popular AUs, but various flavour of Modern AU with the characters assigned random jobs seemed common, and they had a lot of Superhero AUs spawned by HoTGuY. TMA is mostly everyone is happy AUs, like No Paranormal Nonsense AUs and Happily Ever After Post Canon AUs, but also a whole heckin' lot of Time Travel (usually fix-it fic) AUs, which is something I never really saw in the other fandoms
I don't have a good ending to this post as there's no real point to it, it's just me babbling about fandoms
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lunalit-river · 8 months ago
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[Random Babbling] To match L's "slightly evil", so does OCs
Often times when reading self-inserts I could feel somehow the L was a bit too perfect. The perfect introvert lover. In self-inserts fics, it's good, I think, which matches people's tastes.
When writing my own OC and reading other people's OC, the thing that I really wanted to see is the author acknowledging L's flaws. Not the ones that "they're flaws, but they're cute"- no, I mean, real flaws, the flaws that would make you "Hmm. That's...not okay. That is not a person that I would love personally."
I often think that if L is a person in real life, he is definitely not the guy that girls would find attractive or anyone would want to come close to. judging from the first impression, there is no incentive for a normal person to get close to him. Unless you are an extrovert and you could befriend anyone in your classroom, including that weird guy who never wears shoes and chews on his thumb like a baby, sits in the corner of the classroom, and always litters candy wraps. ALL THE TIME.
Acknowledge that L is weird and quirky. Acknowledge that an OC to love such a person is no normal person. Aside from Mary Sue, write an OC with some sort of flaw that matches L's flaws, and then it comes together that they should be together because it's reasonable for a person not that normal to be with L. Give the OC a slightly evil trait. It does not have to be huge, but enough for you to feel, "Okay now that's not really okay, but it...it makes sense"
View L realistically. It's like knowing him in person and a friend of mine when I write him. One of my friends in real life is compassionate, gentle, and caring, but I also admit that she nags, she is depressed, she overanalyze things, and maybe a bit too into politics. It doesn't stop me from liking her and being her friend. I know her flaws realistically, and she may not do a good job in some positions unless a drastic change in life shapes her personality.
As for L, he is a great detective, perhaps a nice lover, but you have to admit that he would choose work before his lover but still maintain to protect him/her. He definitely is not a husband that would cook for you or help you with housework, unless you teach him hand in hand. More often times, he knows how, but he is just not interested. He won't budge. And that drives people crazy. As a father? No, BIG no, the child would hardly see him around and only know that daddy is busy all the time, and therefore he would be closer to mom, and L wouldn't really care if his child is close with him or not.
Acknowledge these.
Or maybe it's me making L more neglectful and more realistically ugly and giving him a reasonable plot to change, learn, develop, slowly become human, and grow.
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hobbitwrangler · 3 months ago
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⭐️ everything you write draws me in immediately
💡 your ideas are always fresh and surprising
I could have picked so many, but I feel like these two compliments go very smoothly together for all of your stories, which are unfailingly so original and unexpected in the absolute best sense. Whether that’s character pairings I’d never think of or fully developed textual ghosts and OCs or trips to parts of the Middle Earth map that most people skip over, you’re always bringing something so amazingly unique and striking and inherently compelling! I can’t help but be hooked right away because you’re dishing out something that I just can’t get anywhere else and you’re doing it with incredible style — dialogue and characters and imagery and more!
This is such a sweet ask, oh my!🥹💚
I do kind of feel that with a lot of my fics I'm grabbing readers by the hand with manic eyes and being like 'okay, hear me out' before babbling for 5k words about characters who barely appear/do not exist/are dead in canon but I'm always pleasantly surprised by how down for it you all are! (And I am so privileged to have you read my fics which are outside your main area of focus as well.) One of the things I love about Tolkien's universe is that there are SO MANY locations and peoples and characters to explore and give your own interpretations of and I so enjoy attempting to fill those blanks and flesh out those minor characters and textual ghosts so I'm glad that other people enjoy the results. And as an aficionado of minor characters, your praise in this regard is very appreciated :)
(also I have received and will respond to the rest of these asks I have been sent. this week has hit me like a truck and they are like little rays of light shining in my inbox. stay safe you lovely things you💛)
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chthonicgodling · 1 year ago
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10 for chal and 18 for pho and icy ?
Ty!!! again questions from here w ocs from here - aaaand again behind a cut cause LONG Lmfao aaughhhh
10- If they have a love interest how much of their character is tailored to be compatible to that person? (Re: Chal)
FENIXE AND I DIDNT PLAN CHAL AND BEL GETTING TOGETHER AT AAAAALLLL just like everything we’ve ever done it just sort of happened! So Chal was pretty solidly the way she was since before Bel, BUT certain traits of hers did definitely end up becoming emphasized just by nature of putting the two of them next to each other especially one specific thing like
The thing about Bel is that, as a mindreader and also as a split god linked to his own twin sibling, Bel’s not…. good at…….. communicating his own thoughts and feelings? Like Bel’s always been used to Ty just knowing everything about him all the time cause the two of them are ALWAYS in each others heads they can’t turn it off. That’s not to say Bel isn’t extremely well spoken and emotionally intelligent he just uh. Forgets to Do That On The Outside.
‘Cause then you put him next to someone like Chal who is not only incredibly imperceptive of how other people are feeling (she has gotten so much better with this but lmao still!!) but also NOT in tune with her OWN thoughts and emotions, and so all of that “Chal-ness” about Chal just jumped way more intensely to the forefront. Bel’s always poker faced and never reveals what he’s feeling - Chal, his partner, is frantically babbling every single thing she’s thinking and experiencing the second anything pops into her head. Bel himself summed up pretty concisely a while ago (yes I went back to 2017 to find tbis exact quote lol) - “I think the way we love each other is different.  You're more intense, I'm more subtle.”
so was that on PURPOSE okay no like I said Chal was never designed with Bel specifically in mind but. Is this something about Chal that’s become more pronounced as she developed alongside Bel! yyeeessss. So to foil alongside Bel Chal has gotten LOUDER and BABBLIER
fun fact re all of this though that idk if I’ve ever shared - they have had MANY conversations about their extreme communication differences cause it has caused problems due to Chal not!! being able to read minds and Bel!! forgetting that not everyone can read minds!!!!! They have a rule set up between them that Chal can ask at any time “what are you thinking” and Bel will always answer honestly no exceptions 💞 Chal asks this 40 times a day and it’s become so second nature to them that she’s even occasionally slipped up and done it to like, Tory, Gany, lol
18- What is the most recent thing you’ve discovered about your OC? (Re: Icy & Pho)
the way these are both Chal related cause the last time they were really around in canon doing anything was around her lmfao—
For Icy: I’ve yet to formally do anything about this in canon but Icy’s still on and off crushing on Chal solely because I think it’s really funny so i’m stalling as long as possible since Neo and Icy are forever endgame anyway. HOWEVER I have discovered in my daydream planning that the way Icy will finally and definitively stop fawning over her is gonna be the moment he finally has an actual in depth conversation with Chal in order to discover that Chal, just like Icy, is an anxious wreck disaster - maybe even more so - and the shock of looking in a metaphorical mirror will be enough to knock some sense back into him. No way can Icy be the put together confident one in a relationship they can’t BOTH be falling apart aahhhh. Icy’s gonna realise that he can only date an opposite! HMM WHO’S ICY’S POLAR OPPOSITE AND CONVENIENTLY HIS BEST FRIEND AT HIS SIDE —
For Pho: this came to light for me the moment Pho and Chal actually met each other in canon cause I hadn’t realized how Pho was going to behave until he was behaving as such (I said, as the person responsible for writing and controlling all of these characters — shhhhhhhh) — is the discovery that Pho REALLY can’t stand Chal and it’s NOT for any of the reasons anyone else has hated her lmfao?! Literally nothing to do with Thanatos?!?!!
Pho and his dayglo glitter projection self has always existed outside of “time” in the sense that since like, physical age 4 onwards Pho has never actually ACTED his age, babbling in competent paragraphs due to his powers as a brain-mental(dream) god advancing him well beyond typical development. Kid-not-really-a-kid. Who else in the palace was merely kid-shaped but actually mentally existing well beyond their physical age???
Why, mindreading mindgods Ty and Bel of course, who froze themselves deliberately in the shape of children at age 7ish to be 7 forever with their big sister Meli, despite their powers advancing them outside the confines of age and space and time. they’re mind gods - they’re every mind!
and that’s a lonely life to live forever but not when you have a glittery buddy who’s also masquerading the same way to hang out with :-) besties! Except of course then Bel and Ty moved to Chal’s house— and dropped the facade, for Chal’s sake, to actually appear as the adults they were. For Chal’s sake! happily ever after for Chal!
…well. then. Pho was quite dismayed to discover that his besties weren’t kids to hang out with anymore. they didn’t even tell him fffdkfkff whoops??? like they just showed up at the palace again all different and Pho hanging out there with Icy was like what the FUCK??? so when Pho finally met Chal the discovery - suddenly became very clear to me that he harbors QUITE a bit of jealous resentment against her for “taking Bel and Ty away” and uhhh. will this be a grudge Pho holds forever?! maybe lmao! everyone’s oblivious no one can read Pho’s mind cause it’s all glitter sooooo……….. hm…….. keeping that one in the back of my mind……
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abeltownshipslittlebitch · 1 year ago
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So true, the 5/Simon dynamic is just *chef's kiss*!
Can I ask what your 5's relationship with Simon was like pre-betrayl? What kind of things did they do together and we're they just friends or was there maybe something there that could have been, in a different life?
Also (because I have to sneak in a question about my other fav ship), what was your 5's relationship like with Peter pre-reveal? And did your 5 see it coming or was she completely blindsided?
Sorry if you've answered/talked about this before. Feel free to just link the posts if you have. 💛
I really haven’t talked much about my specific five so thanks for asking! It’s kind of long so I have a read more.
Pre-Betray my Five, Callista, and Simon were besties. They loved going on runs together and Callista cared about Simon quite a bit and vice versa. Callista didn’t have any attraction to Simon romantically or vice versa during early seasons, although their friendship was strong in a way that made them almost seem like platonic soulmates. During the time Callista couldn’t speak, she taught him sign language (she’s American but she knows British sign language) although it didn’t help much because I say that Simon would always grab her wrist while they ran together. It made running a bit awkward and uncomfortable, but it became a habit and it kept Simon from having to worry about Callista being the little crow she was from running off to collect a new trinket and nearly giving him a heart attack when he turns around to see her gone.
They hung out a lot, but usually with some OCs I made just for my world that were people Callista cared about. Callista loved reading as an escape so she babbled to Simon about books a lot, and she is a pretty good cook so cue her dragging Simon into the kitchen to help her with a recipe. And since she is American and lived in the southern region she cooked those kinds of foods which Simon always was skeptical about but tried anyway because she looked so happy to be reminded of home again.
Speaking of her being American, when she regained the ability to talk, it became pretty common for the two of them to make fun of each other’s accent. They teased each other a lot but it was always in good fun.
Basically in those early seasons my Five and Simon were best friends who loved each other platonically but much more than most friends did.
In the seasons with Peter pre-reveal, Callista did feel drawn to him and she trusted him way quicker than she normally would. It confused her, honestly. But it felt nice to be close to someone again in that platonic way, although this time there were romantic notes in there that was the start of an a extremely slow burn… because neither of them actually believe they have feelings for each other until much later. Peter didn’t realize he had romantic feelings for Callista until near the end S7 and Callista didn’t realize she had feelings for him until the gap between S8 and 9, and neither of them even admit it to each other until about 1/3 way through S9, and things are complicated because of other failing relationships they were both in but not sure if they should let them go.
Back to pre-reveal though, Callista has smart and stupid moments. She’s an amazing runner and is quick in coming up with plans and spotting things but she always did not see the reveal coming for two reasons:
1. She can be really fucking stupid and oblivious when it comes to these things.
2. After Simon “died” in S3 finale she refused to believe there was a chance he might be alive because if she gave herself that hope and then never saw him again and he was actually dead it would destroy her. (She was so devastated by Simon’s “death” in S3 she actually stopped talking and only spoke via sign language, which she hadn’t done since she regained her ability to speak in early S2. She was mute during the entire time skip between S3 and 4 and only spoke again because her sister came to Abel and she was so angry because she and her younger sister have major beef that she started speaking just to curse her out.)
Back to the point, there were obvious signs, but Callista was oblivious and in denial so she never saw it coming. Peter even did the same habit of grabbing her wrist while on runs and she would just awkwardly pull away and tell him only one person had that privilege (but Peter still did it out of habit and Callista eventually just let him). Callista tries not to think too much about it.
When Peter admits that he’s Simon, Callista’s brain short-circuited and she nearly had to be dragged to safety from the zombies around them because she just froze. There was an argument later because Callista wasn’t sure how to process all of this, but it ended in tears with Callista’s much shorter frame hugging Peter right enough to hurt as she sobbed “I missed you,” over and over again.
I hope that answered your question! And thank you for the ask about my Five!
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Angst #14– for any Ship/Character/OC. Up to you.
“If I were to have a real daughter, I imagine she would look a lot like you.” Renona's mother, Casca, said with a voice that echoed through her dreamscape. Her voice was strong, powerful, not something anyone would expect from the four foot halfling abomination. But to Renona is was also soothing.
It had to be a dream.
Renona knew that Casca had died long ago. But when she opened her eyes, there her mother sat, very much alive. Her eyes cold, gray, and filled with mischief that followed every move with that criticizing stare. Her skin soft, pale, and flawless without the wrinkles that usually plagued others her age. Her own blonde hair held no hint of gray as she let the shoulder length strands fall freely to her shoulders. Yes, this was Casca. Her mother, the creator of all of them.
“My beautiful Renona, you look so real.” Her small hand reached out, ushering Renona to her. “So little like your brothers and sisters. So much like our child should look like.”
“Mother?” Renona whispered. She let herself slowly descend to the floor so she could sit in front of her mother. “I don't understand. Why have you created me like this?”
“You need to blend in.” Renona flinched feeling those nimble fingers run through her dirty blonde hair. “I need you to be human enough to help bring about your father's reign. I know I won't live to see the day, but he shall rule the world once more. I need you, my wonderful Renona, fight in my stead and win for us. Make us proud.”
Those words. They were the ones that Casca used to say to her when she was younger. The more Renona thought about it, the less dreamlike this was. It was a memory she wished she could bury.
Renona shivered. That's right, she wasn't really their daughter. She was nothing more than a machine to help bring about the end of the world. Her life wasn't real. Nothing she did was by choice. It was all encrypted programming. Commands that her mother entered into her long before she was actually Renona, dictating every aspect of her life.
“You're so much more that just a bunch of bolts and wires.”
The dream shifted, but Renona knew the voice. Those words that had changed everything.
The Traitor, Artemis as she called herself, reminded her of that. On the green hill of the guardians, that overlooked the world, the Brown haired vampire had reminded her.
“So what if you were made for evil. That doesn't make you evil.”
Renona didn't want to believe her at first. But… if everything she did was truly programmed into her, Artemis would already be dead. But she stopped her spell, midcast, to listen. Her mother hadn't programmed her for that. She lived to kill everyone who got in the way of setting her father free from the hell he had been imprisoned in for the last three hundred years. But she still stopped for no reason.
Artemis was the first one to tell her, maybe not in so many words, that her life was her own.  And for that, she would change everything she was meant to be. She would become a traitor to her own as well, dedicating her life to the person who saved her. She didn't need to know the brunette's goal. It was clear enough what she was trying to do.
This time the words she wanted to hear, the same ones that her mother had told her were left unspoken.
‘Figh for me. Win for me.’
So I don't usually do an  A/N on prompts but this one is special. Originally I had no idea what to do with this. I was going to do a TDP ficlet but I don't know if you are in the fandom. So I decided on this. This is not how the story ends. I am wary about using the Ocs of others after many issues but know that it isn't Renona x Artie. There is only one person for Renona.
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jadenvargen · 3 years ago
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your kiraodo melted through my brain like acid and feels like someone smooching my heart directly!!! but also jay what odo childhood novel (and is it good and should I read it)
ACH i’m glad I really love ’em… omg I have so much to say about the novels I feel like I’m gonna ramble for a hundred years but TLDR; they’re the terok nor trilogy and they’re called night of the wolves, dawn of the eagles, day of the vipers, and are about the occupation of Bajor from the cardassian DS9. the ones concerning baby odo’s upbringing are dawn of the eagles and night of the wolves:)
honestly i skimmed them a lot for character parts because the writing and OCs didn’t really have me hooked personally, but oh man those parts were stellar. It skips a lot since it follows a lot of chsracters but we get Odo learning to talk, babbling like a baby and being a creepy little slime baby not knowing how to make a real body :) Just adored it! Also his basic education, confusion about gender(yayyy), confusion about identity, and very downplayed but still present mora brand parental abuse. more details and rambles about the novels and details under readmore LOL
Also, Odo’s first years outside. We also get his days as an officer. One ”oh huh” thing is that Mora says it’ll be at least 10 years til he’s can think and function like an adult when he starts working, (which I find particularly interesting as he remarks to Laas he first gained sentience 30 years ago in season 7— making him 23 at the start if the show, and the youngest core crew member any way you slice it.) (extra extra funny that In the beginning script Odo was pitched as a ”middle aged clint eastwood type”— gee, that changed quick!)
We also get Kira’s resistance days which I think tend to be written in a kind of corny YA fashion but it might be fun for some people! And also get a Quark Odo meeting much like in — and we also get Odo’s first-first time seeing Kira when she breaks into his lab, which I think is extra gender fun because he thinks she’s a boy before he’s like wait… she has a different vibe…. bit corny but fun:) Odo also helps out with Bajoran resistance fighting as he gains further understanding, and in fact it’s Kira who recommends him for the job of security chief at DS9 so Ok. Interesting.
Some Odo exerpts I think are very. Good! :]
All in all I’m kindof a snob when it comes to published writing and also I hate most DS9 novels they’re all well, tv tie-in novels but also theu’re either boring as hell, misogynist, racist, or like everyone is an evil sex pervert. The Terok Nor ones are fine, buuuut I would honestly skim if you’re not a diehard for lukewarm space politics, I don’t think the conflict or OCs are especially interwsting and the first book is just about Dukat and Doesn’t explore him in any way I personally find interesting. Dawn of the eagles can be found on internet archive but the others aren’t hard to find Somewhere if you catch my drift.
Also if by any chance you’re interested in any other DS9 pockets my two cents are the only ones that are fun are:
-the tempest
-vengeance
-devil in the sky
-saratoga but only the subplot where odo has to impersonate quark for a ferengi deal the sisko plotline is hell on earth😔
and a stitch in time is widely recommended but I’d skip tbh… or like the parts on ds9 with julian are good, but i cannot say i care at all for the cardassian maze runner divergent ghoul school, nor the way any of the women are written lmao and i read classic french lit for a hobby so u kno its bad if i cant stand it it’s literally the she breasted boobily down the stairs meme😂 i never read the 34th rule because i found its concept extremely tasteless. like really… anyway sorry for the ramble I just get really excited talking about star trek tie-in novels.
TLDR theyre kinda boring but have fun parts and are avaliable free online so i mean why not?
++Odo’s first words and some other Le Swag Baby Odo scenes:)
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thevikingwoman · 3 years ago
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This story about my wayfarer Illia is set in the years after graduation, prior to the fall of the spire. I wanted to explore her past relationship, and fill in some details about her, including how she got her scar.
Fandom: Wayfarer IF | Words: 2890 | Read on AO3
Illia Strand x OC | post prologue, after graduation | angst Rating: Teen. Romance, feelings, angst, injury mention, blood mention, non-graphic violence, love,
Now Is A Bad Time // Touch
Illia barely dodges the ball of fire hurled right at her. Usually, a magical fireball would not be a problem, but these fuckers, they’ve figured it out. The fire might be magically ignited, and the projectile hurled across the road with magic, but her opponents have been lighting some sort of combustible material on fire, and the result is not magic at all. The excruciating pain in her shoulder is the proof.
She dodges another, and how much worse can it get?
However clever they think they are, Alessar steel is Alessar steel, and the fire needs to catch the kindling to hurt her. Illia rushes, Wavebreaker in her hand. She leaps, thrusts and slices. The fire mage crumbles before her. A useless ball of paper and wood hits her face, the magical thrust breaking as it hits her face. Illia yanks Wavebreaker free of the body and pivots, it’s watered edge red with blood.
“Please, please…” the other mage cowers before her. She snarls. Her head is ringing, her shoulder burns and smoke chokes the air.
“It was their idea, I’d never have done it, I’m sorry –” the man keeps babbling.
He was just as culpable as his partner in their crimes, and enough innocents has suffered.
Illia exhales. She promised to bring them both in, and leave them at the hands of whatever justice will be handed out. She’ll probably be sent off without payment if she manages to kill them both. It’s time wrap up.
Later, every time the cart hits a bump in the road, her shoulder screams in agony. It had been a shit job, but now it was done. The body of the dead mage is at the bottom of the cart, his whimpering friend trussed up next to them. They’d hadn’t expected their time as highway robbers to end and quickly and brutally, she supposes. Nothing like a wayfarer to remind mages they aren’t invincible.
Finally, Illia halts the cart in front of the guard house, and jumps off the seat. She flinches when pain flares in her shoulder, but grits her teeth. Just hold it together a little longer. She leaves the mage with his dead companion, and walks to the young guard by the door.
“Where’s Captain Zoran?”
The door flings open, and the captain steps out, shrugging on his coat.
“I got your mages. One of them’s dead.”
“Greetings to you too, Strand.” Zoran frowns. “There were to be apprehended, not executed without a trial, Wayfarer.”
“You can do that with the other. If they wanted a chance to speak their case, maybe they should have surrendered.”
The captain ignores her, and orders his people around, dragging the dead body off the cart and the live mage inside the guard station.
“My payment?” Illia grits.
“I’ll have to lower it since of them is dead, subtract the use of the cart, the delay of apprehension.” He’s ticking off items on his fingers.
“Today, Captain Zoran.”
The man grunts and turns, walking inside. Illia follows.
“I’m going to lower the payment more if you break our wards.”
Inside, he counts out a small pile of money, swipes them into a bag and tosses them to her. The pain in her shoulder is a rising agony now, but she manages to catch the bag and stuff it in her pouch. Zoran clearly wants her gone, but her medicine kit is probably not going to be enough. Some of her shirt looks like it’s melted into her flesh. Maybe they used some nefarious sort of alchemy too. No matter how unfriendly Zoran is, she has to swallow her pride.
“Do you know of a healer who can help me with this?” Illia says, and gestures to her shoulder.
“Not one who can help the likes of you, Strand,” he sneers. “There’s your payment. Now get out.”
She had might have hoped for a little more friendliness, given that the two mages have been terrorizing anyone leaving on the South road for weeks, but she really shouldn’t have been surprised. Maybe she can ask around at the market by the docks. She should have done so before hunting mages, but it wasn’t meant to turn into such a shitshow.
She’s halfway down the street when someone calls after her: “Try Rani up at Gull Street, I’ve heard she knows lots of stuff.”
“Thanks,” she calls back.
Lots of stuff. That’s not a shining endorsement, but she will take it.
She staggers down the street, where the fuck is Gull? There’s Birch, Alder, is she even heading in the right direction? The pain is searing and there’s Albatross, closer. She turns up Gull, and wonders how she’s supposed to find a healer, but halfway down the street there’s a green door, vines climbing up the walls and pots on wooden shelfs with plants she recognizes; the small blue ones Torvar had in her garden.
Illia knocks on the door, her other arm, the one where her shoulder isn’t burning. Thankfully, it opens soon after, to a woman with deep brown skin, golden eyes, and dark blue hair in ringlets crowning her head.
“Can I help you?”
“I – “
Illia collapses forward into her arms.
---
When Illia wakes, she’s in a soft bed, the smell of herbs and lavender in her nose. She’s on her front, head buried in the pillows. She tenses. Where’s her sword?
“Don’t move.” The voice is low and calm. “You’ll pull the bandages if you move on your own.”
Illia slowly turns her head, and source of the voice is sitting at a table, a woman working something in the light of conjured spheres hovering about her. Behind her a window shows the night sky.
How long was she out?
“Did I pass out?”
“In my arms,” she says, her golden eyes sparkling. “You’re lucky, Wayfarer. It’s not always I have the supplies I need at hand.” She’s beautiful, and Illia flushes. She remembers now, staggering down the street, knocking on the door.
“Thank you.”
“I’m Rani Kaxes,” she says.
“Illia Strand. I’d get up to greet you, but you just told me to stay put.”
“I do appreciate when someone is being a good patient.” Kaxes puts her tools down, and walks to the bed. “Here, let me help you. It shouldn’t be an issue sitting up, I only want the bandage to stay where it is supposed to be.”
Illia nods as best she can, and Kaxes reaches for her, and keeping one hand on the bandage, she grips Illia’s arm with the other, pulling her to a sitting position. Illia grimaces against the pain. It’s duller now, but still there.
“I’m afraid it will leave a scar. There is only so much I can do without my magic.”
“That’s expected.” Scarring is a fact of life for any magianis. Moreso for Wayfarers. It is not a peaceful profession.
Properly seated, Illia offers her hand. After a slight hesitation Kaxes takes it. Her hand is soft against Illia’s calloused one.
“Thank you, Kaxes. I’m sorry I bothered you. I can pay.”
“I expected as much, given the coin rattling in your pack. I do tend to help people who faint on my doorstep, though.”
She tilts her head against the small pile of Illia’s belongings stacked against the wall. She draws breath of relief when she sees Wavebreaker, safe in its scabbard.
“I will get going, then.”
A wave of pain and nausea hits her when she stands and she closes her eyes briefly against it, gritting her teeth. She tells herself she’s dealt with worse before.
“Sit back down, Strand.” Illia does, relief flooding her simply not having to keep herself upright. “All you’re going to do is make it harder for me in the long run. I’m not sure how you got burned like that, but it’s not a simple thing. You’ll need to take it slow.”
“I can do that,” Illia grins.
She stays, and Kaxes shares her dinner, bread and cheese and honey. Illia tells how she managed to get injured, and Kaxes seems happy with the rogue mages gone rather than offput by what Illia can do. Later, at the healer’s insistence, she sleeps in the bed, the fighting and the pain making her limbs tired.
The next morning, Rani fixes a new bandage on the wound, her calm hands brushing across Illia’s skin. She’s careful and precise, and very close. Illia looks away.
With a promise of no sudden movements and to come back the next day, Illia leaves, seeking out the inn she was staying at. She makes sure to pay for the next week, so doesn’t want to find another place while she rests.  The innkeep frowns but accepts her crowns readily enough.
---
Illia returns to Rani Kaxes the next day, the pain in her shoulder much diminished. She’s at her door, talking with a short human man carrying a babe at his hip, another child holding his hand.
“It’s nothing, Tearn. Just a small bump. I’m happy to help.”
“My husband will be by with some bread later, Rani. It’s the least we can do.”
Kaxes smiles, and ruffles the child’s hair as Tearn leaves, softness in her eyes.
“Strand,” she says, calling out as she notices Illia, and the softness doesn’t leave her eyes. “Come inside.”
Inside, Illia sits at the table while Rani works at the bandage. She gives a pleased little hum.
“Much better today. I still want the cleansing salve on for another day. Can you stay a little?”
“I’ve got nothing else to do.” Illia sits and remembers the bag in her hand. “Do you like cherries?” Illia asks when she’s done. “I passed by the market, and they looked very ripe. I got a bag.”
Rani nods and smiles and puts them in a small bowl. “Thank you, Strand.”
“Call me Illia,” she says on impulse. “Please.”
“Of course, Illia. And everyone here calls me Rani anyway. We’re not much for formalities here.”
She gets a sense of this as she visits Rani a few more times. There’s a community here, the people who live nearby, those who know and uses her services. They stop by with gossip or fresh jam or other goods. Children come by to show her pretty rocks and get a salve for a scratch that needs no healing other than love. Sometimes coins pass hands, but it’s informal and just enough for Rani to live comfortably in her small house.
She’s powerful though, one day an Aeda woman bursts through the door, a screaming child in her arms, their right leg bent in an impossible angle. Rani had first set it, as Illia would have done on a fellow wayfarer, and then used her magic to heal it. The child had been running and jumping before the night fell.
Rani acts different than Illia would have thought any magic user with her skill would. She’s generous with her magic and her healing, and very knowledgeable too. Illia thinks she could have joined the guild maybe, or set up a clinic for the rich and powerful.
Instead she’s here, in her small house with pots of healing plants, with a small kitchen and a rickety table, sharing a sweet wine with Soris, an elderly fisherman with a bad knee that can’t be fixed with magic, but soothed with a warm compress. Illia has cleansed and deboned the fish they brought with them. She knows how to cook fish, and rifles through the cabinets, looking for the spices Mother’s favorite cook used. There’s a quiet feeling, almost like she belongs with these people, like she’s back at the Spire with other Wayfarers. Like she’s home.
Later, after Soris left, after they’ve eaten the roasted fish and drunk a little more of the wine, Rani feels like home when Illia kisses her.
---
Illia no longer needs the excuse of her fully healed shoulder to visit by now. Her and Rani spend mornings in bed and evenings with walks by the piers. They share dinners and kisses by the hearth.
Wayfarers don’t settle down. You travel, you go where you’re needed. But there’s always a bit of work, and it’s not so bad to be gone a week to clear out a nest of Snarls. The small creatures are not dangerous to Illia, but their puffs of toxic magic are troublesome for most people.
Rani welcomes her back in her house and her bed, smiles and kisses and laughter and soft hands.
It becomes a routine, of sorts. Illia has long since stopped pretending she needs a room at the inn, instead coming back from every outing to Rani’s house. Sometimes she has to be gone for a while, but Rani is always understanding, encouraging.
Illia is relishing the small and grounding feeling of love and belonging that grows in her breast.
---
It’s been a few months like this, and this time, Illia has been gone for more than two weeks. She can’t wait to be back again. It wasn’t that the trip was difficult, but there’s longer and longer between the people who wants to hire her. It’s worth it though, coming back. She smiles as she turns up Gull Street, and knocks on her favorite door.
Rani opens it slowly, and Illia’s smile fades when Rani stays in the doorway, her face carefully neutral.
“I’m sorry, Illia.” The low light behind her reflects her blue hair in deep shadows across her dark skin. “Now isn’t a good time.”
“I just — I thought — “
Illia reaches for Rani, but she steps back, flinching away from her. With Rani no longer blocking the door, it’s clear someone else is in the room behind her, a glimpse of pink skin against the blankets.
“Please don’t, Illia.” Rani looks away, her shoulders hunched. “When you touch me, it feels like you’re draining a little of my life away. I can’t do that. I’m sorry. I can’t live like that.”
Illia’s hand drops to her side, powerless. She looks away, away from the room, away from the person who doesn’t seem to steal Rani’s magic from her. Away from Rani and she has nowhere to look except at her feet.
“I didn’t want to tell you like this, Lia,” Rani continues gently, “I’d tried to let you know that it was better if you left, if you went somewhere else. Went wherever your next task takes you.”
Illia nods, and look back up at Rani. She wishes the other woman would hate her, or look disgusted, or bored. All she sees is compassion and it makes everything worse.
“I’m sorry, I misunderstood, I —" she burns with embarrassment, her cheeks hot. She hasn’t felt this close to anyone, not in years. She can’t help what she is, though, and she forgot it’s not really something people want. “I’ll leave then. I’m not going to waste more of your time.”  
“It was good, Illia. I just – I just can’t.”
“I see.”
She doesn’t, she’s too numb for that. Too surprised.
“Goodbye, Illia. Be safe.”
“You too, Rani. Farewell.”
Illia is seven steps away before Rani’s door slams close behind her. The green door, the small house with herbs and vines and shared laughs and shared bodies. Illia hurries away, not caring where her feet take her. Wavebreaker is a steady presence at her hip. Fuck it. It’s not like she can settle down anyway. Her eyes are only watering from the wind.
Her feet take her down the streets, through the market and to the docks. On their own accord, they seek the sea, even after all these years. She scans the harbor for the ships, the flag she knows. The port is very small, more for fishing vessels than trading ships, so there is nothing she recognizes. Surely; it’s relief in her chest. She does not need to be reminded of one rejection by another.
For now she walks to the end of a half empty pier – the fishers are still out today – and drops her pack with a thud and herself with it, her feet dangling over the water.
She opens the paper bag with fried sugar pastries she picked up on the way. She might as well eat both of them, while they’re still hot.
She thinks about the shared laughs, and the feel of Rani’s skin under her fingertips. Of the cues she must have missed, every time she found some work further and further away, of the reassurances of take your time, and you should go help. Not reassurances all, but hints she missed. She thinks of the slight hesitation whenever Rani reached for her. The moments she ignored, they both ignored, to enjoy each other. She thinks of the scented oil at the bottom of her pack, a small bottle she picked up at Rethos on her way back, scented with lavender and sage, lightweight and perfect for hair, but not hair like her own. She wants to fling it into the ocean, but that would be a waste. She should sell it, really.
The stars come out, winking across the sky. There are no Southern Lights here.
She’s heard trouble is brewing in Vestra. There will be work to be found. People who needs her help.
She’ll look for ship in the morning. --- edit: picrew of Rani :)
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waitimcomingtoo · 5 years ago
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Imaginary Friends
Pairing: Dad!Tom Holland x Reader
Request submitted by @karaannejones
Synopsis: Tom thinks you’re his sons imaginary friend until he meets you or as I like to call it  FBI OPEN UP...ur heart lol
Masterlist
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“FBI! OPEN UP!” Spencer softly kicked the door to Tom’s room with his little fingers in the shape of a gun.
“I didn’t do it! I’m innocent!” Tom held up his hands as he son pointed his finger gun at him. He got out of his chair and tumbled on the ground to get away from Spencer.
“Pew pew! Pew pew!” Spencer followed him and chased him out of the room. Spencer grabbed an FBI hat that was way too big for him and put it on his head before tackling Tom. Tom pretended to fall to the ground and threw Spencer in the air a few times until he noticed his hat.
“Where did you get that?” Tom asked as he held his son above his face.
“The pretty lady next door.” Spencer answer as his hat fell into his eyes. Tom set him down on the ground and fixed the hat to sit better on his sons head.
“The pretty lady next door?” Tom furrowed his brows. “I’ve never seen anyone in or out of that house.”
“Because she’s a secret agent, duh.” Spencer giggled as his hat fell down again. “No one can see her unless she wants to be seen.”
“What does this lady look like?” Tom played along, thinking Spencer just had an imaginary friend.
“She’s beautiful.” Spencer gushed. “She wears all black like a ninja and has a shiny badge. She lets me hold it sometimes.”
“Wow.” Tom pretended to be impressed. “What’s her name?”
“I can’t tell you. It’ll blow her cover.” Spencer said like it was obvious. He began to roll around and pretend to shoot things with his finger guns
“Right.” Tom chuckled. “She sounds really cool, buddy.”
“She is. She fights bad guys.” Spencer did a karate pose. “And sometimes, it’s bad girls.”
“Like Doc Oc and Venom? Daddy fights those guys too.” Tom humored him.
“Like kidnappers.” Spencer replied to Tom’s surprise.
“Kidnappers?” Tom questioned. “Where did you see that?”
“The pretty lady next door told me.” Spencer said. “She also told me to keep the doors and windows locked at night.”
“How long have you been talking to this lady?” Tom wondered. Spencer’s imaginary friend was pretty detailed for never having been mentioned before.
“A few months. She’s away a lot for cases.” Spencer explained as he began to play with some toys scattered on the carpet.
“Okay, buddy.” Tom laughed in content. “Maybe you can introduce her to me sometime.”
“Okay daddy.” Spencer smiled happily as Tom came over to play with him.
~
A few weeks later, Tom walked past Spencer’s room and heard him talking to his toys.
“You can never talk to strangers. Don’t let them buy you any candy or ice cream, even if it’s a fudge pop. You can only talk to adults that you know.” Spencer explained you his toys. Tom smiled to himself as he listened to his son babbling. He walked into his room and took a seat across from Spencer.
“Who told you all of that, buddy?” He laughed curiously.
“The special agent next door.” Spencer repeated. “She said we need a code word in case a stranger tries to pick me up from school.”
“A code word?”
“If they don’t know the code word, I won’t go with them.” Spencer explained and Tom realized he was right.
“That’s a good idea, buddy. What do you want the word to be?” He asked his son.
“Y/n.” Spencer said immediately.
“Y/n? Why that?” Tom wondered. They didn’t know anyone with that name, to Tom’s knowledge. He had no idea where his son would learn that name.
“That’s the name of the lady next door. She said I could tell you since you also fight bad guys. Can that be our word, daddy?” Spencer asked as he ran a toy car over Toms leg.
“Sure.” Tom agreed. “That can be our word.”
~
“Look daddy! I got a gold star on my report.” Spencer ran into the house, waving a piece of paper around in the air.
Tom greeted his son with a smile and scooped him off the ground, giving him a big kiss on the cheek before taking the paper.
“Who I Want to be when I grow up by Spencer Holland. Aw, buddy. Good job.” Tom praised as he read the title of the paper.
“I’m gonna go play.” Spencer told him and ran to his room.
Tom sat down at the kitchen table to read his sons paper.
“When I grow up, I want to be like the lady next door. She’s a secret agent for the FBI and brings home lost children. Her job is very dangerous because she fights bad guys. I think she is very smart and brave and that is why I want to be like her.” Tom read. He wasn’t disappointed that it wasn’t about him, just concerned. It was one thing for Spencer to have imaginary friends, it was another thing to write about them at school. Spencer could talk about the lady next door all he wanted at home, but that’s where it should stay. Tom was raising him all on his own, and he didn’t know if six year olds should be talking about their imaginary friends to other people. He decided to talk to Spencer about it as he made his way to his room.
“Hey, buddy, can we talk?” Tom asked as he knocked lightly on Spencer’s doorframe.
“Okay daddy.” Spencer smiled at him from his bed.
“I see you wrote your report on the lady next door.” Tom began.
“I did. I’m going to give it to her when she comes home next week.” Spencer bounced your and down in excitement as he brushed the hair on his police Barbie. Tom laid the report on his bed and sighed.
“Spencer, I had imaginary friends at your age too. It’s perfectly normal.” Tom began. “You just can’t write about her at school like she’s real.”
“She is real!” Spencer protested. “She lets me work on cases with her and let’s me hold her briefcase.”
“Do you think maybe you saw her on TV and got confused?” Tom asked gently. “Nobody lives next door, buddy.”
“Yes she does.” Spencer whined. “I’ll prove it to you.”
“You don’t have to prove anything to me.” Tom assured him. “She can be real at home, but it’s different at school.”
Spencer was about to say something when he heard a car door slam outside. He looked out his window and broke into a huge smile.
“She’s home!” Spencer cheered and ran out of the room. He ran all the way outside and tackled you in hug. Tom watched this from the window with a shocked expression. His son was hugging a woman he had never seen before, and he looked completely comfortable with her. Tom was about to go outside when he noticed a gun strapped to your hip.
Could Spencer had been telling the truth?
“Spence!” You hugged Spencer tightly before setting him down. “How are you doing, buddy?”
“I missed you.” He smiled wildly. “Do you have any cuts from the bad guys?”
“Nope.” You said proudly. “We took him down and ended the case a week earlier than we thought. Thanks for helping me work the case.” You cupped his chin fondly and dug in your pocket. “If you’re gonna keep helping me with this, you’re gonna need a badge of your own.”
You handed Spencer a tiny badge that said FBI on it and his eyes lit up with joy.
“Wow!” He beamed. Thank you! Now I can be just like you. I even wrote about you in my report.”
“You did? Can I see?” You asked him and he handed you the paper.
“Here. I was just showing my daddy.”
You took the report from Spencer’s hands and gave him a grateful smile. You read the paper a few times, almost teared up from how much it meant to you. He grinned proudly at you as you rubbed your thumb over the gold star.
“I love this. Can I keep it for when you’re a famous FBI agent?” You asked him as you pinned the badge to his chest.
“Okay.” Spencer nodded eagerly. You took your eyes off him for a moment when you heard his front door open. Tom came running out of the house and bent down next to his son.
“Spencer, what did I say about talking to strangers?” He scolded before looking up at you. You gave him a kind smile and his heart nearly stopped. Spencer really knew what he was talking about when he called you a pretty lady. Tom flushed in embarrassment and gave you a shy smile back.
“She’s not a stranger. She’s a secret agent.” Spencer insisted and you chuckled. You and Tom stood up and you held out your hand.
“Hi, I’m Special Agent L/N.” You introduced yourself and shook his hand. “You can call me Y/n.”
Tom opened his mouth to speak but found himself star struck. You were exactly as Spencer described in your all black outfit and pretty face. He couldn’t believe he had lived next to you for so long and had never seen you.
“See, daddy? She’s not a stranger.” Spencer said as he tugged on Toms hand. “She fights the bad guys like you do.”
“Oh, are you in law enforcement as well?” You asked Tom and he immediately forgot what he did for a living. Spencer tugged on his hand again and Tom snapped out of it.
“My character is.” He answered. “I’m an actor.”
“Have you been in anything I would’ve seen?”
“Depends.” Tom said. “Are you into natural disasters or superhero’s?”
“I can’t say I am.” You laughed the most beautiful laugh Tom had ever heard. “You mean like Marvel?”
“Yeah. I play Spider-man.” He answered, beginning to feel more confident when your eyes widened in amazement.
“No way.” You gasped. “I didn’t know I was living next door to a superhero.”
“Neither did I.” He laughed softly. You looked at each other for a moment and smiled.
“What do people call you when you’re not playing Spiderman?” You realized your never caught his name.
“Sorry, I’m Tom. I’m Spencer’s dad.” He looked down at his son and noticed the badge on his chest. “What’s that?”
“It’s a badge. Y/n said secret gents need a badge.” Spencer said proudly as he tapped on his badge.
“It’s true. Now you’re official.” You nodded at Spencer. Tom looked between the two of you with a pleasantly surprised smile. Seeing you be so kind to his son warmed his heart. Spencer didn’t have the easiest type making friends in school because he was shy, but he seemed extremely comfortable with you.
“Cool.” Spencer wiggled with excitement. “I’m gonna catch an unsub.”
“I bet you are.” You winked at him before he ran off.
“So how do you guys know each other?” Tom wondered once Spencer had run off.
“Oh, Spence is the smartest guy I’ve ever worked with.” You laughed and folded your arms. “He helps me with cases all the time. He’s loves reading the case files.” You shrugged and Tom smiled at you fondly.
“He talks about you all the time. You’ve taught him a lot.” Tom said in appreciation. It was nice to have someone else looking out for his since he was raising him all alone.
“I’m sorry if I overstepped.” You said suddenly. “The badge is something they sell for agents with kids. He always asks to see mine so I thought I’d get him his own.”
“No, it’s fine. I really appreciate it, actually.” Tom assured you. “This whole time, I thought you were his imaginary friend.”
“Really? That’s so funny.” You smiled in delight. “I usually see him in the yard and ask him for help with the case I’m working on. Don’t worry, I’ve never shown him anything graphic or violent. He actually helped me crack a case the other week when he suggested that the unsub could be a woman.”
“Unsub?” Tom questioned.
“Sorry. Work talk.” You laughed shyly. “Unidentified subject.”
“And he helped you find the person?” Tom asked in amazement. He couldn’t imagine how his 6 year old helped the FBI.
“Absolutely.” You insisted. “My team was only looking at male offenders until Spence said it could be a woman. He’s actually really good at this stuff. He told me he wants to be an agent when he grows up. I hope you don’t mind, I gave him one of my hats.”
“I don’t mind at all. He thinks you’re a secret agent, though. Like a spy.” He chuckled and you shook your head with a smile.
“I told him I was a special agent. He must’ve thought I meant secret.” You explained. “It’s okay. He still understands what I do.”
“I know. I hear him teaching his toys about safety all the time.” Tom said and you put a hand over your heart.
“Does he? That’s so cute.” You pouted. “I just taught him a few safety precautions he should always take.”
“Thank you. I appreciate that.” Tom said sincerely. He couldn’t help thinking about how motherly you already acted towards Spencer. Tom didn’t date because of the thought of having to introduce Spencer to random women scared him, but you had already formed a bond with him. Tom couldn’t help the butterflies he was feeling from being around you. Everything about you, from your independence to your bravery, was drawing Tom in.
“Of course. It’s my job to keep people safe.” You nodded. “I also just like talking to him. You have a really great kid.”
“Yeah, I know.” Tom smiled proudly as he looked over his shoulder at Spencer.
“You and your wife did a great job with him.” You said quietly as you looked down at your boots.
“Yeah, uh, no wife.” Tom scratched the back of his head and you tried to hide your smile. “It’s just him and I. And apparently, you.”
“I see a lot of horrible things on the job. Your sons smiling face makes me remember why I do what I do. It’s all for the kids.” You said sincerely.
“What do you do, exactly?” Tom wondered.
“I work for the FBI and I specialize in child abductions.” You told him and he looked impressed as it all made sense.
“Oh. So that’s where he’s getting all his information from.” He realized. “I think you taught my son more than I ever did.”
“He was always happy to learn.” You smiled brightly. “You’re lucky you don’t have a daughter. I would have a lot more safety precautions to teach her.”
“I’m sorry. Your job can’t be easy.” Tom frowned. You had to spend all day looking for missing children, and he was sure you didn’t always find them. That couldn’t be easy, yet you still faced the world with a smile on your face and kindness in your heart.
That only made Tom like you more.
“It’s not.” You agreed. “But every time I get to reunite a child with their parents, I remember that it’s worth it.”
Tom opened his mouth to speak and closed it. He had never been so star struck around a girl before.
“Sorry, I’m just a little speechless right now.” He laughed shyly and scratched his head again. “You’re just kind of the most amazing person I’ve ever met. I, um, wow.” He shook his head to regain focus as you laughed.
“Thank you, Tom.” You smiled. “I’m really glad I got to meet the man who raised my favorite kid.”
“Do you think we could maybe continue this meeting over dinner?” He made a bold move to keep you on the line.
“Are you asking me out, Spiderman?” You cocked your head and squinted your eyes at him.
“I’m trying to. I’m not very good at this.” He said sheepishly. You took a step forward and straightened out the collar of his shirt as he watched you with wide eyes.
“Well I think you’re doing a great job.” You but your bottom lip and looked him in the eyes. “How does 7 work for you?”
“7 is good.” He squeaked and you smirked.
“I’ll leave my gun at home. Unless you’re planning on getting fresh. Then I’ll have to arrest you.” You said seriously.
“I-“
“I’m teasing.” You cut him off with a laugh. “I’ll see you at 7.”
Spencer ran back up to you and Tom and Tom picked him up.
“See, daddy? I told you there was a pretty lady next door.” Spencer insisted. “I wanna be just like her.”
“Aw. You’re gonna be the greatest FBI agent the world has ever seen.” You pinched his cheek. “I hope you’ll invite me to your induction ceremony.”
“Maybe you can come as my date.” Tom shrugged and you shot him a smile.
“Yeah. Maybe I can.”
Tag List 🏷
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wiypt-writes · 4 years ago
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Stark Spangled Rebirth
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Chapter 3: You Look Taller
Summary: Steve is transformed into the world’s first Super Soldier, but after a bomb is detonated in the SSR lab, he is soon putting his new found strength to the test.
Warnings: Bad Language words.
Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark
Word Count- 7.5k ish
A/N:  I might have taken a few liberties here with the way things worked in the Army in the 40s but, let’s face it, no more than the MCU did! Any mistakes are my own. I’ll probably spot them once posted but, whatever!
This series is my contribution of sorts to the CATF 10 Year Anniversary Challenge.
Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.
SSR Masterlist // Main Masterlist
Chapter 2
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Steve didn’t sleep a wink that night. His mind was in overdrive, his body spiking with just about as many contrasting emotions one could possibly feel all at once. Excitement, fear, pride, concern, uncertainty, determination…and then there were his thoughts about Katie and what they’d done last night. He was conflicted about that as well. On the one hand it had been so wrong, to have rubbed one another to release through their clothes, without even courting so to speak. It went against everything his Ma had taught him about treating a dame with respect, instead he’d gone head and behaved just like Bucky normally did when he paraded around in his uniform, using it to pick up any woman he could.
But on the other, nothing had ever felt so damned right to him before in his life.
He still couldn’t quite believe it, although the evidence it had happened was plain to see in his pants which he’d hastily changed and hidden in the bottom of his trunk. What he was having trouble processing was why. Why a dame like that had picked a guy like him. He still wasn’t completely convinced she wasn’t acting out of pity. Pity that he was about to undergo some transformation and had never been touched that way before.
But then she’d admitted that she hadn’t either. “What was it you said about waiting for the right partner?”
Maybe she did actually feel something for him. And whilst it hadn’t been the most conventional beginning, perhaps it might morph into something else?
 With a groan he shook his head, who was he kidding? It was June, 1943 and they were in the middle of a war. He was about to be injected with some kind of serum that was either going to turn him into a soldier with enhanced capabilities or…well, he didn’t want to think about the 'or'. Either way, he knew what should be at the forefront of his mind, and a relationship with Katie Stark was not it.
He went about his morning routine as normal. Thanks to the SSR’s programme being covert, most people on the base completely ignored him as usual, which suited him fine. The last thing he wanted was people asking him questions about how he was feeling, because he simply didn’t know. This time, once he was dressed he ensured all his belongings were packed ready to be taken to his new barracks, wherever they were going to be and no sooner had he done that the door opened and he snapped to attention, saluting the soldier that had arrived along with Agent Carter.
“Hello Steve," she smiled at him.
“Good morning, Ma’am.” He said, his hand, dropping to his side and he relaxed as she instructed him to be at ease.
“Are you ready?” She asked.
“As I’ll ever be.”
“Good, follow me then.”
Grabbing his hat he headed after her, walking in silence through the camp, his eyes focussed directly ahead. Eventually he was led around to the main office buildings, outside of which a car was waiting. Peggy walked around one side where the driver opened the door for her and Steve snapped himself out of his thoughts and climbed into the other side, shutting the door behind him.
 The two or so hour drive from New Jersey to their destination was quiet. Agent Carter made a little small talk, but for the most she was silent or conversing with the driver. That said, it seemed to fly by in comparison to when he had taken the trip the other way a little under a week ago. As he glanced at the buildings passing them by, one by one they started to get familiar.
“I know this neighborhood," Steve said absentmindedly as he looked out of the window. “I got beat up in that alley.” He continued watching his finger pointing out of the window, his eyebrows raised as he spotted another familiar landmark, “and that parking lot.” Another pause as his head dropped slightly, eyes on his hands which were clasped on his lap, “and behind that diner.”
“Did you have something against running away?” Peggy asked and Steve took a deep breath, shaking his head as he remembered his Ma’s words to him.
“You start running they’ll never let you stop.” He explained, once more glancing out of the window, “You stand up, push back. Can’t say no forever, right?” He gave a shrug and once more his eyes fell to his hands. He stared at them, and the longer he stared the more he thought back. 
Hands that had last night traced the soft curves of Agent Stark’s hips, breasts. The vision coming in so clear, nearly like a picture show and it caused him to swallow a little, his throat and mouth feeling dry and he couldn’t help but wish that it was Katie in the car with him, not Agent Carter. Whilst the pretty, British woman sat on the seat beside him had always been pleasant enough to him, there was something about Katie that just kept him grounded if there ever were a word to describe the way she made him feel. He never once felt jittery in her presence yet now, as he sat there being quizzed on something that was actually quite personal, he was starting to feel a little angsty.
 “I know a little of what that’s like. To have every door shut in your face.” Peggy spoke gently as she looked at him and Steve met her gaze for a second before she looked forward once more, and his mind strayed back to something Katie had said last night.
“Yeah, I guess so.” He looked down at his hands. “Katie…I mean Agent Stark told me about how people weren’t exactly open to the pair of you joining the SSR or the Army.”
“She did?” Agent Carter looked at him, her brown drawing ever so slightly into a frown.
 Steve nodded, “last night.” And no sooner had the words left his mouth his eyes widened as he realised he’d outed the fact Katie had come to his barracks. Peggy looked at him, an immaculately shaped brow arched slightly, rouged lips curling up into a smirk at one side as Steve began to babble out an excuse. “She came to check on me, along with Dr Erskine. I mean, well, just as he was leaving that is. There was…we just…”
 “You don’t need to explain. What you and Agent Stark do is nothing to do with me,” Peggy shook her head, the corner of her lips twitching as Steve hastily looked away, out of the window, his cheeks burning. “I do know one thing though...."
 “What’s that?” Steve’s head whipped round to look at her.
“She’s soft on you.” Peggy replied simply “That’s why she’s been torn ever since you got picked to be our candidate.”
“Torn?”
“In case it goes wrong.” Peggy shrugged, "Or you change in more ways than physically which means you’re no longer the man she…” Peggy trailed off, licking her lips taking a deep breath before she continued “…the man she clearly cares for.”
Steve met her eyes for a second before he looked away, his stomach now twisting in knots that had nothing to do with the procedure he was about to undergo. But the warmth and excitement he had initially felt at what Peggy had said died all too fast because of course it would be just his luck to finally meet a gal that enjoyed his company, liked him for who he was, a gal who he felt comfortable with and attracted to, just as he was about to undergo whatever the hell this procedure entailed before he shipped off to goodness knows where.
Fate was a cruel mistress sometimes.
The rest of the journey passed in silence, and it wasn’t long before the car pulled up at the side of a fairly busy street and Steve frowned, following Agent Carter’s lead, climbing out of the vehicle. He took a quick look around. There were plenty of people on the sidewalks in the summer sun, going about their everyday business, none paying him any attention.
“This way.” Agent Carter spoke and he spun to follow her, taking a look up at the fairly non-descript shop called ‘Brooklyn Antiques’ which she was leading him towards.
“What are we doing here?” he asked.
“Follow me.” Peggy completely ignored his question and instead walked into the shop, Steve behind her, placing his hat on his head.  The bell above the door rang as Peggy pushed it open, Steve pausing to shut it behind him as Agent Carter strolled into the dimly lit, crowded shop. It smelt of old leather, wax and furniture polish and was crammed full of all sorts of intriguing items that Steve would normally have found fascinating.
 But as it stood he was just plain confused.
Peggy stopped still as an old woman with grey hair, clad in a floaty dress and a pink cardigan emerged through a set of heavy drapes and stopped, smiling at them both. “Wonderful Weather this morning, aint it?” she spoke.
 “Yes, but I always carry an umbrella.” Peggy replied.
 At her words the woman gave an almost in perceptible nod and moved to the desk which held the cash register. Steve heard a faint buzz and then Peggy gently gestured once more for him to follow her. He did so as she walked through the drapes the woman had emerged from into a crowded store room of sorts which held photos, heavy gilded frames, basically everything his Ma would have labelled junk. He stopped besides Peggy as she looked at a huge book shelf which covered nearly the entire back wall and then to his absolute astonishment the book shelf simply opened towards him revealing that it was actually a set of solid steel doors.
 Steve’s mouth dropped open as he was now facing a huge corridor which was in use by a number of military and medical staff walking by. Agent Carter stepped in and he did the same, following her down, glancing every so often to his side at the Military Police Officers and soldiers, trying to figure out how the hell all of this was hidden from public sight on the outside. Eventually they reached a set of double doors which were pulled open and Steve found himself on the mezzanine balcony of a huge circular room filled with machinery, some kind of pod in the middle of the chamber he was looking over. It was full of doctors and technicians, all dressed in white lab coats and the entire room fell silent as everyone looked up at him. He immediately spotted Katie, stood by Dr Erskine. His eyes locked onto hers and even from the distance he was away he could see they were shining in the light of the lab.
 Agent Carter took a deep breath and tuned to her right, Steve hastily following her down the metal steps to the lower part of the chamber. He strode over to where Dr Erskine was waiting, file in hand besides Katie who smiled at him. 
“Hi.” She said gently and he smiled back at her, swallowing a little as his attention turned to Dr Erskine as the doctor spoke.
“Good morning.” He smiled, shaking Steve’s hand when suddenly a camera flashed as a photographer who Steve hadn’t noticed snapped a shot, causing Steve to blink a little. “Please, not now.” Erskine protested and the photographer made a hasty retreat, ushered away by Peggy as she followed him from the chamber, directing him away from the equipment and up the stairs to the side.
Steve turned to his right, looking at the pod, his eyes roving all the dials and the various components, his chest expanding as he took a deep breath.
 “Are you ready?” Katie asked softly and Steve nodded his head, turning back to her.
 “Good.” Erskine spoke. “Take off your shirt, your tie and your hat.”
“Maybe the hat first.” Katie quipped, pointing out the order Erskine had said the clothing items in was a little awry and Erskine looked at her, sarcastically. She met his stare with an equally sassy one of her own, a cheeky grin on her face as she shrugged.
 Steve did as he was told, handing his items of clothing off to a nurse who smiled, taking it away before Erskine directed Steve up the steps to the left of the pod. He climbed up, shuffled around slightly as Katie watched him lay down, his head on the leather headrest at the top.
“Comfortable?” Katie asked him.
“It’s a little big.” Steve joked, smiling and she gave a soft chuckle, reaching out to touch his arm. Her hand was surprisingly warm and she left it there for just long enough before she pulled back as Erskine appeared by her side, smiling. “You save me any of that schnapps?” Steve looked at him.
“Not as much as I should have.” Erskine almost grimaced, “sorry. Next time” at that he stepped back. “Mr. Stark, how are your levels?”
Steve glanced to his left and for the first time caught a glimpse of Katie’s brother up close as he strode towards them, clad in a smart pair of slacks, white shirt, tie and waistcoat.
“Levels at 100%.” Howard replied as he stopped besides his sister, taking a look at Steve. Now they were side by side, the resemblance between the two was clear to see. Same nose, cheekbones, but Katie’s hair was a lighter shade, her eyes a warm, striking green where Howard’s were a deep brown.
 “Good.” Erskine turned away as Howards eyes roved over Steve a little.
 “We may dim half the lights in Brooklyn, but we are ready,” Howard smiled, “as we’ll ever be.”
“He’s not a damned fish in a bowl, Howie.” Katie nudged her brother as he was still staring at Steve. Howard turned to face her, his eyebrow arched, before he gave Steve one last look and headed off towards some kind of machine in the far corner of the room.
 “Ass.” Katie shook her head before she glanced at Steve. “Are you sure you wanna do this?” She dropped her voice, “If you’re having any…” “I’m not.” Steve shook his head.
 “Okay.” She took a deep breath, and for a second looked as though she was going to say something else but she was interrupted by Erskine.
 “Agent Stark? Don’t you think you would be more comfortable in the booth?”
“Oh, erm, yeah, of course. Sorry.” She nodded and turned once more to look back at Steve. Again, she made to say something, but clearly decided against it. Instead she reached out, gave his hand a soft squeeze before she walked away. Steve watched her go and, as she approached the stairs, she stopped and looked back at him, her face softening once more into an almost shy little smile before she turned away again. 
Steve’s head rolled back round, his eyes fixed on the ceiling. His heart was racing now, and he wasn’t quite sure whether that was all down to the procedure or the fact that her hand on his had jolted another memory of their time together the previous night. Luckily, before he had time to dwell on it too much, there was a loud booming noise as Erskine loudly tapped a microphone.
“Do you hear me? Is this on?” Satisfied that it was, the doctor turned and looked up at the small group gathered to watch in the glass walled room on the level above the atrium. “Ladies and gentlemen, today we take not another step towards annihilation, but the first step on the path to peace.”
As Erskine spoke two nurses pulled down the large rectangular shaped pads at either side of the chamber, laying them flush to Steve’s chest.
“We begin with a series of micro injections into the subjects major muscle groups. The serum infusion will cause immediate cellular change.” Erskine continued as the nurses retrieved the vials of blue coloured liquid, slotting them into the appropriate receptacles along the side of the chamber by Steve’s hips. “And then to stimulate growth, the subject will be saturated with Vita-Rays.”
 Erskine walked back to Steve’s side as a nurse approached him with a syringe. She inserted it into Steve’s shoulder and he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as she pulled the needle out of his skin.
“That wasn’t so bad.” Steve spoke, pleasantly surprised at how easy that had been. He wasn’t a huge fan of needles, having spent most of his childhood one way or another being stabbed by them for his various ailments, but he’d learned to cope with them.
However, his relief was short lived.
“That was penicillin.” Erskine looked at him and Steve felt not only apprehension creeping back into his system, but a deep embarrassment at being so dumb as to think it would be that simple.
Erskine then cleared his throat and spoke once more to the others in the room. “Serum infusion beginning in five, four…” at that two further pads like the one on his chest lowered, cuffing his arms a little “…three, two…” Erskine gently patted Steve’s shoulder “…one.”
 Steve felt the sharp cone-like spikes of the pads attached to his body piercing his skin and he could actually feel the serum as it flowed into his body. It was cold, like he’d dipped each limb into an icy lake, and the shock of it forced his eyes wide open.
“Now, Mr. Stark,” he heard Erskine say and, after a second or two he felt the pod move into an upright positions, the sides and top parts enclosing him inside. He gave a snort as he realised that the glass screen at the front, designed for whoever was in here to be able to see out of was a good 6 inches too high.
 Steve took a deep breath and then there was a little knock on the outside of the capsule.
 “Steven, can you hear me?” Erskine asked.
“It’s probably too late to go to the bathroom, right?” Steve joked, making light of what was happening, the sweat already beading on his brow. And, if he was honest, he probably could have happily peed right then, more out of nerves than anything else.
“We will proceed.” Steve heard Erskine say and then a few seconds later the capsule he was in was flooded with a warm light, as the Vita Rays were turned on.
  “That’s ten percent.” Steve could hear Howard’s voice. “Twenty percent. Thirty…that’s forty percent.”
As the count increased so did the intensity of the light and heat. What started off feeling like a pleasant dose of summer sun was rapidly becoming unbearable. Even the brightest sunlight he’d ever been in on Coney Island during the summer was nothing compared to this. He skin felt like it was on fire.
“That’s fifty percent. Sixty. Seventy.”
Despite his best attempts, the burning was simply too much and Steve couldn’t keep the yell of pain from bursting out of his mouth any longer as the vita rays washed over him. He was hot, hotter than he had ever been before. His skin was bubbling almost as if his blood was boiling similar to a kettle of water. He was vaguely aware of voices outside the chamber and herd Katie’s loud yell as it rang around the air.
“Shut it down.”
Erskine’s voice hit his ears as the doctor banged on the chamber he was in “Steven!”
“You heard her, shut it down!” Agent Carter’s voice was clear and then he heard Erskine once more as the Doctor frantically shouted. 
“Kill the reactor, Mr. Stark! Turn it off! Kill it! Kill the reactor!”
“No, don’t!” Steve yelled back, finally finding his voice. There was no way he was quitting, not after he’d come this far. He could take this. Pain was nothing, he felt it every day of his damned life. “I can do this!”
Famous last words. The heat increased, the pain increased, it was too much. Every muscle in his body was searing in agony and it felt like someone was lancing him with red hot needles over and over again…
But then suddenly it went dark. The pain was gone, the heat was gone and all Steve could feel now was an overwhelming sense of calm and tiredness even, like he’d just been on another one of those damned runs with the unit. His chest was heaving as he gulped in air, his head falling to the side as panted, waiting for his body to recover. After waiting, for what seemed like forever but was in reality mere seconds, he heard Erskine call out to Howard again and then the doors to the pod opened, the cool air hitting Steve’s perspiring skin.
He stumbled out of the pod supported by two people, he had no idea who, as his eyes were screwed shut, his head bowed as he took deep gulps of air. His legs felt heavy and he was a little unbalanced, as if his centre of gravity had changed somewhat, but as he took a shaky step forward he noticed how clear his chest was. His breathing wasn’t wheezy in the slightest and with every breath he took he felt stronger, less lightheaded. All in all, despite feeling completely overwhelmed he felt good.
“I did it.” He panted a little, his eyes still closed as he took a shaky step forward.
“Yeah, yeah. I think we did it.” Erskine’s voice came from his right, followed by Howard’s from his left which was laced with pride.
“We actually did it.”
“How do you feel?” Another familiar voice spoke and with a deep breath he straightened up and looked down at Katie before he glanced around the chamber and realised that for the first time in his life he was looking down at people.
“Taller.” He answered a little facetiously, glancing at Katie as she reached out to touch his chest, swallowing a little as she hastily withdrew her hand.
“You look taller.” She handed him a T-shirt she took off another member of the nursing staff. Steve took it with a thanks and moved to pull it over his head, his breathing finally evening out and he turned to face a doctor who approached him a little nervously.
“Mr. Rogers, we just need to-“
But whatever it was that they needed Steve never found out as at that point there was a loud explosion from the room over the atrium, showering them in glass. Instinctively, Steve pulled Katie towards him, curling his body around hers to shield her from the debris before he stood up tall as he heard Erskine yelling.
“Stop him!”
Then there was a gun shot and, as he wheeled round, he saw Erksine drop to the floor. Katie pushed past Steve whipping a gun from her hip taking aim as the culprit ran up the stairs with the two female agents in persuit.
Steve knelt beside Erskine, his eyes locking onto the doctor's as he struggled for air. Erskine opened his mouth, but shut it again, and Steve realised from the blood that was pooling around the doctors body, there was nothing he could do. Erskine raised his right hand, and simply prodded Steve’s chest gently, right above his heart, similar to the way he’d pointed at him the night before.
“Not a perfect soldier, but a good man…”
The words echoed in Steve’s brain as he watched Erskine’s eyes close as his head rolled to the right, his breathing stopped. Steve took a deep breath of his own and felt another heat radiating through his body, this one out and out anger as he raised his head slowly to look at the stairs the suspect had run up mere moments ago. His jaw clenching he sprang to his feet and ran off, taking the steps two at a time. 
As he sprinted through the facility he could hear gunshots and explosions from the street and as he emerged into the street he saw the woman from earlier led on the floor, not moving, a wound to her chest. Vaulting over her he saw Katie to his left tending to someone who was down on the sidewalk, whilst Agent Carter was stood in the road, un-moving, arm raised as she shot at a Yellow Taxi which was driving straight for them. He threw himself at Peggy, taking her out of the path of danger as the car sped past
“I had him!”  Agent Carter said with an air of annoyance as they both climbed to their feet.
“Sorry!” Steve yelled as he started to run after the car, surprised momentarily at the way his legs just seemed to move with little or no effort, covering far more ground than he was used to. He picked up the pace, tracking the car as he went, taking a short cut down a road to his left. But he was going too fast and, as he rounded a corner, he lost control over his new power and crashed straight through the window of a Bridal Wear store, taking out the display. He jumped back up, straight onto the street, tossing another apology over his shoulder as he cut down a narrow alleyway with a chainmail fence at the bottom.
The fence was ten feet tall, easily, and Steve picked up speed a little more with the aim of jumping as high up it as he could get before scrambling over the top, but as he took off from the floor he realised that he was going to clear it. He was going to clear a ten foot fucking fence.
Tucking his legs up, he landed easily and ran out onto a street full of cars, his hands held up, protests of “woah, whoa, whoa” slipping form his mouth automatically as they all skidded to a stop trying to avoid him. He spun to his left, spotted the cab and continued his chase as it weaved itself in and out of the traffic.
He was gaining on it now and he dug a little deeper, realising he had a lot more energy in his tank, his bare feet slapping the wet concrete of the ground. As he drew closer to the car he knew that the only way to get the vehicle to stop was by getting inside it, and to do that he needed to physically get hold of it first of all. An idea suddenly came to him as he saw a car in front of him and he approached he hopped up onto the trunk then the roof, and then to the car in front before jumping onto the back of a truck. With a final leap he flung himself at the yellow taxi landing flat on the roof, his hands gripping either side of the sills above the doors as it began to sharply weave side to side. It took a sharp turn to the left, then right, then left again, forcing Steve to adjust his hold as it tore down a narrow street before emerging on the road which led to the pier. This gave Steve a little time to steady himself and he rose tentatively onto his hands and knees before there was a loud bang and a bullet shot through the roof of the car. Another few shots came, Steve dodging them all as he slid down the side of the car, wrenching the passenger door open. But before he could climb in, the man shot at him, meaning Steve had to let go with his right arm to avoid taking the bullet straight in the chest, but by shooting at him, his target had taken his eyes off the road, meaning he hadn’t noticed the two trucks emerging in front of him. The taxi crashed straight into them and flipped over sideways, beginning to roll and Steve let go, tumbling forward onto the floor before he came to a stop.
Steve rose to his feet and headed forwards as his target crawled from the car. He watched as the man stood, pointing his gun towards Steve and shot, missing him, the various people screaming as the gun went off. Steve picked up the door of the car which was lying in the road and held it in front of him as the man shot twice, the second bullet coming through the door and grazing the left hand side of Steve’s abdomen. As he peered round the side of the door he noticed that the man had now taken a young boy hostage, his arm pinned around his chest as he dragged him backwards, the boy’s mother screaming and begging for him to stop. Steve tossed the door to the side, following him, his right hand clutching at the wound to his left.
“Get back!” The man warned with the boy dangling in his arms as he backed away. Steve dodged another bullet, flattening himself against the wall. The man ran off towards the dockside and Steve followed using a large iron buoy as shield from another incoming shot. He hastily followed, keeping his back to the damp brick of the shipping company building, and as he peered round the arch he saw the man raise his gun and press the barrel to the boys head.
Steve’s blood ran cold, “wait, don’t! Don’t!” He protested, approaching with his arms up. At that the man pointed the gun at Steve and pulled the trigger, Steve automatically flinching as he awaited the shot that never came because the gun was empty. As he had nothing else to do, the hostile dragged the boy towards the side of the docks and Steve realised what he was intending to do.
“No! Don’t!”, but it was too late. With a shove the kid went flying into the water and the man turned, sprinting away. Steve ran to the edge to see the kid treading water, looking up at him.
“Go get him! I can swim!”
Decision made, Steve sprinted after his target who had disappeared, but as he ran he noticed to the right in the water some kind of sleek, black submarine pulling away. With a spring off the edge Steve dove into the icy, cold water, swimming in the vessel's slipstream. Whether the sub wasn’t going that fast, or if it was his ability to simply swim faster, Steve had no idea, but he caught it easily, punching straight through into the cockpit, flooding it with water. He then wrenched the canopy open and pulled the man sharply upwards sending him flying straight out of the surface and onto the cold stone of the dockside where he landed with a thud.
Steve followed quickly, climbing a set of steps out of the water and as the man got up, Steve saw the flash of a blade in his hand. With a reflex that was purely automatic, he dodged out of the way aiming a kick to the man’s chin which sent him sprawling backwards. The knife flew from his hand, but so did a familiar vial which Steve suddenly realised was full of Erskine’s serum. It shattered on the floor, the blue liquid pooling on the damp cobbles as Steve gripped the lapels of the man’s jacket, pulling him harshly forwards.
“Who the hell are you?” He demanded.
 “The first of many," the man spoke in a thick accent. “Cut off one head-” at that he popped a tooth loose and swallowed it, looking at Steve, his jaw set, “-two more shall take its place.”
 Steve frowned, perplexed as none of that made any sense, until he spoke again, through the foam that had now started to bubble from his mouth.
“Hail HYDRA!”
With that the man gave a little grunt, his pupils completely dilated as he grew heavy and limp in Steve’s grip. Steve let go, the body falling to the ground as he straightened up, his chest heaving as he stared at the dead man on the floor.
Steve couldn’t help the disappointment flooding his system at the fact he hadn’t managed to capture him alive. But that said, whilst he hadn’t managed to find out who he was exactly,  he now knew who he was working for and at least they’d managed to stop the serum from falling into the wrong hands.
The serum.
At that Steve glanced down at his hands, which were both significantly larger, then to his forearms where the muscles flexed as he opened and closed his fists. With everything that had happened he hadn’t had chance to appreciate the extent to which the procedure had actually enhanced him. He’d run with a speed he had never thought possible, his lungs had stretched to a capacity that now, he thought about it, stunned him, his ability to swim the way he had, leap, the pure athleticism he had displayed in that short ten minute chase was astonishing.
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His hands flew to his stomach to find a hard set of abs, his fingers tracing the definition of the planes of muscle under the wet t-shirt which clung to his body. His hands moved upwards almost tentatively, reaching the hard curve of his pecs and it was at that point a voiced broke through his stunned thoughts.
“Steve!”
He looked up to see Agent Stark running towards him. Behind her, Agent Carter and a few other soldiers and police officers were working to keep the now assembled crowd on the pier back. “Are you okay?  You’re bleeding.”
Steve glanced down at his shirt and noticed for the first time the blood on the white material. He shook his head.
“He shot me but it's just a graze, I’m fine.” He jerked his head towards the guy on the ground by his feet. “More than can be said for him…”
She glanced down at the body on the floor, blinking as if she was seeing the dead man for the first time before she dropped to her knees, her fingers pressing into his neck checking for a pulse.
“Did he drown?”
“No.” Steve said, and he quickly explained about the submarine and pulling the man from the water. As he explained about the vial of serum, he saw Katie’s eyes flick to the broken glass on the floor before her face darted back to Steve as he told her about the man having loosened his tooth and bit something. “I’m not sure what it was but…”
“He bit something?” Katie’s entire face changed into a look of shock, her eyes darting side to side as she wrenched the guys mouth open, her fingers jamming straight inside.
 Steve grimaced. “What…”
“Son of a bitch.” she pulled her hand back and knelt back on her heels, wiping her hands very ungracefully on the side of her skirt.
“I’m not…”
“Cyanide capsule.” She sighed, “a lot of the intelligence organisations provide them to their undercover agents and they keep them hidden in a false tooth. If you’re caught, you can effectively kill yourself before you’re taken and, well…”
“Tortured?” Steve finished for her. Katie took a deep breath and shrugged.
“Questioned was the word I was going to use but…” she shrugged, looking around. “He was clearly a Nazi Spy.”
Steve looked at her, nodding. “He was HYDRA.”
“HYDRA?”
“Heil HYDRA.” Steve looked down at the dead man, “last thing he said before he died.”
 Katie bit her lip, “fuck,” she mumbled, before she looked up at Steve. “Sorry, just, well Erskine warned Phillips not to be complacent about Schmidt but Phillips was adamant that Hitler was the big threat.” She bowed her head a little, her shoulders slumping and Steve took a deep breath as he realised that the Doctor was no longer with them having died in his arms little over ten minutes ago. It left him feeling hollow, sick even and from the looks of it Katie was feeling just as bad.
But now wasn’t the time.
“I err…” Steve cleared his throat a little, composing himself. “I’m not following? Why did Erskine differentiate? I mean, I thought HYDRA were Hitler’s deep science organisation?”
Katie glanced down once more before she turned her pretty face back to Steve, “Yes, they are. But Erskine always said Schmidt had ambitions beyond Hitler’s. Something Peggy backed up from her time undercover.”
 At that point she made to stand and automatically Steve offered her his hand. She took it and he made to pull her up, but with his new strength he was far more forceful than he had meant to be and she gave a little yelp of surprise as she was jerked straight into his chest.
“Easy Soldier.” She gasped, her hands falling to his biceps as she steadied herself.
“Sorry," he hastily apologised, his own hands settling gently on either side of her ribcage, the rough tweed of her uniform jacket prickly under the pads of his fingers. “I’m not used to…” He trailed off as he realised that not only was he looking down at her now, but his new large frame completely dwarfed hers.
“Don’t worry about it.” Her voice was equally breathy as his, her eyes still on his face and she gave him a little smile before she moved one hand upwards, gently cupping his cheek, almost as if she was checking something, which to be fair, she might have been. Steve had no idea what he looked like, he hadn’t seen a mirror yet. The only parts of him he’d managed to get a glimpse at so far were his arms and legs.
What he did know was that her touch was blazing on his skin, more than it had been the night before. He could hear her breathing too, and he could see every single detail on her face and her eyes. Not only were they green, but they were the most gorgeous shade of green he had ever seen in his life. He could see the dots of brown speckled throughout and the slight ring of amber surrounding her irises, reminding him of the sun. Full of warmth and power….
“Hey, you okay?” Katie frowned. 
“Yeah, erm, I just, I can see better.” Steve replied simply, as her hand gently curled in on itself as she dropped it to her side. “Has it…” he began to ask and Katie smiled, shaking her head.
“Still handsome.” She smiled, and Steve felt his neck flush with heat again before a voice cut through their moment.
“Did you get it?” Colonel Phillips was striding towards them. Katie moved back from Steve, turning towards her Superior, steeling her composure. 
“No,” she shook her head, before gesturing to the shattered vial on the floor. 
“Shit.” Phillips exclaimed with a groan.
“But neither did they.” Katie looked at him, before she turned to look at Steve once more, “And there is one upside to all this…”
“Don’t you dare tell me to look on the Brightside, Stark.” Phillips glared at her as she took a deep breath, realising her head, chin jutting defiantly towards him.
 “At least we know it works," she said simply.
 Phillips looked at her, then to Steve, before he gave a snort. “One isn’t enough.”
 Steve inhaled deeply, his frustration mounting but it was Agent Stark that spoke next.
 “Well, one is all you’ve got. I suggest you start treating him with a little more respect seeing as he just chased down a damned HYDRA operative through twelve blocks of Brooklyn, pulled him out of some underwater craft and took a bullet for his troubles.”
 Phillips’ jaw twitched at the way he was being spoken to and Steve grimaced slightly in anticipation of the incoming dressing down Katie was going to get, but it never arrived.
 “HYDRA?” Phillips blinked and Kate nodded.
“Yes, Sir.”
 The man took a deep breath and then turned to Steve, his eyes travelling up and down his body “Rogers, you hurt?”
“No, Sir.”
Philips inhaled again and then turned to Peggy “Agent Carter, I want a recovery unit down here for this so called underwater craft. You two…” he spun back to face Steve and Katie, “back to the lab so the Medical Team can assess you. If you are truly the only super soldier I’m getting, then the last thing I want is you to drop dead of complications.”
 “That means he cares," Katie looked up at Steve who glanced at her as he saw a smile tug at her lips.
 “You’re gettin’ on my nerves,” Phillips pointed at her, before he gave her a filthy look and turned to leave.
 “Is it authority in general you got a problem with or just him?” Steve asked after a moment or two and Katie let out a little chuckle.
 “Believe it or not I actually like Chester.” She smiled, “I just enjoy irritating him more. Come on, we’re attracting a bit of a crowd so…” She gently squeezed his hand before she began walking the same way Colonel Philips had done a few moments before, Steve following, pausing slightly as he felt a tug on the side of his T-shirt. He stopped and turned to find the kid who he’d last seen bobbing up and down in the muggy water of the docks grinning up at him.
 “That was swell!” The kid laughed and Steve raised his eyebrows.
 “That’s not exactly the word I would use…”
 “No, but the way you ran and jumped in and then threw him outta the water like BAM!” The kid smirked and Steve felt his neck growing warm at the praise, raising a hand to rub at the back of his neck. “What’s your name, Mister?”
 “Err Steve.”
“Marty!” A voiced called and the boy turned, Steve following his gaze to see a woman who had been stood talking to a police officer, hastily making her way over. “Come on.”
 “Ma’am.” Steve greeted her as she stopped in front of him, taking a breath.
 “You saved him.” She said, her voice cracking.
“Oh, no, I…”
“Thank you,” she stood on her toes and kissed Steve’s cheek before she dropped an arm round her son’s shoulders and turned him away, gently talking to him.
 Steve stood stock still for a moment, swallowing, before he turned to see Katie watching him, her eyebrow arched a little, smile spread across her pretty face.
 “A regular superhero,” she teased and Steve rolled his eyes at her as he fell into step besides her.
 “Hardly.” He scoffed, “I’m just a kid from Brooklyn.”
Katie stopped and turned to face him, shaking her head, “you still don’t get it do you?”
“Get what?” He frowned as she began to walk again.
 “How many other kids from Brooklyn do you know that would have just done what you did?”
“Well its hardly a fair comparison is it?” Steve pointed out as they walked down the side of the building, Katie nodding to Agent Carter as they passed “How many others do you know that just got converted into…well, a Super Soldier or whatever the hell they’re calling me?”
“You had no idea what that serum had done, other than make you taller,” Katie shot back as they moved back towards the entrance of the pier. “But you took off after that guy, without so much as a second thought for your safety.”
 “I just did what anyone would have done.” He sighed, a little uncomfortable at her praise.
 She stopped at the side of a black car and turned to face him, her face soft, “no, you did what that kid from Brooklyn would have done.” Her eyes remained locked onto his before they were interrupted by an Army official who handed Steve a blanket. He took it with a thanks, wrapping it around his shoulders, despite the fact that he didn’t feel cold in the slightest, in fact he felt a pretty strong sense of warmth.
 And as he watched Katie climb into the car he was pretty sure that wasn’t solely attributable to Erskine’s serum which was now coursing through his veins. 
**** Chapter 4
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mint-yooxgi · 3 years ago
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Hi! I just had to say I absolutely LOVE your y!Yuta x chubby reader story. As a chubby person myself I'm thankfull that there are romance stories of us as the mc. There should be more though since then we (chubby people) would realize we dont have to be 'skinny' in order to be loved we are just as loveable as anybody else and we dont have to 'work' on ourselves before getting into a relationship (The same could also be said about disabilities- we dont see much of a romance novels/stories esp. fanfictions with a disabled mc. Or at least I haven't). Well, actually i think this 'you have to look certain way in order to be loved" is something everybody has been told and the media enforces it (explains pick me's peraphes?). That problem should def be fixed.
Also I love that you showed us her inner thoughts and that she had a couple of very supportive around her (i would never be brave enough to talk about my struggles with my friends, they are great friends actually i just don't like to talk about my feelings lol).
Another thing I loved was how your characthers always ask for consent (in other drabbles too). I feel it's sooooo important to have it in (esp. yandere) stories like that. Though consent should be asked all the time even if they already have been togheter for years. And the ending where Yuta say: "Now, it's time for mine." sounds more like a demand than asking for consent. Something like: "Can I now have mine?" should work better. Of course unless it's the point that they never consider yn's feelings or thoughts since they are at the end of the day yandere and they 'know' what's best for their lover.
Oh no, I'm sorry i babbled so much but overall I really liked your drabble and I cant wait for more! Best of luck!
Hello there! Thanks so much for reading and enjoying my fic!!
I agree, there should always be more stories that are inclusive to everyone!! The media definitely plays a strong role in society and culture by enforcing beauty standards and ableist notions. Again, I agree, it should change and be more inclusive for everyone.
And oof, take it from one who has done the exact same thing as you before by not sharing my feelings. Don't do that. In the end, you're telling yourself that your emotions, boundaries, thoughts, and feelings don't matter by pushing them aside like that. Especially if they're negative, all of those feelings are just going to keep building and by keeping them bottled up, they might just one day overflow and become so much more than one can handle. I would recommend getting in contact with a therapist or a counsellor at least so you can have a healthy outlet for those feelings if you feel as if you cannot talk to your friends about them!
Again, thank you! I agree, I think consent is very important not only in stories, but just in general! Though, I'm going to have to agree to disagree on you comment about the last line of my fic. I can 1000% understand how it could be interpreted that way. However, given everything else in that fic that Yuta does and says, he would never, not in a million years, ever do anything like that without the OC's consent. If the OC immediately goes 'no' or 'stop' or even so much as grimaces or hesitates, he would not go forward with what he was about to do.
The reason it ends with that line is due to a few reason.
Pacing of the fic - The line at the end is meant for impact, ending on a high note. The flow of the story is always important to me, and it felt right to end it as I did, as I had always planned.
Yuta's character - as mentioned previously, throughout the fic, the OC's comfort and personal preference are Yuta's number one priority. During the smut scene, he even explicitly states so, and as soon as the OC expressed hesitation or discomfort, he immediately asked if they wanted to stop. During this scene, Jiyeon calls and takes the OC's attention away from him, and Ayato was brought up again, so his jealousy is simmering beneath the surface. I wrote him with great undertones of possessiveness, so this comment also stems from this.
Like I say in my disclaimer right at the beginning, I wrote this fic explicitly for me. At the end of the day, I'm going to write what I want to see, and I enjoy that line, honestly. The way I interpret it is that now that Yuta finally has the OC, so to speak, he is overcome by his desire for them, and finally he gets to act on it. To me, knowing someone is desperate and wanting me like that is quite attractive, and given how I wrote Yuta's character (and all my other characters in general) I know that he would never force himself onto the OC like that. Maybe that wasn't clear enough in the fic, though.
I do really appreciate this feedback, though, and I'll try to keep it in mind for next time! I'm always very conscientious of consent in my fics, especially my yandere ones, so I hope to continue to write them like I have been.
Thanks again for reading my fic, I'm glad you enjoyed it!
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morganas-pendragons · 4 years ago
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My Heart (It’s Impenetrable) | Crosshair
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this is my first time writing for the bad batch that didn’t involve skip, please be gentle.
this might be kind of OC but i added another prompt i thought of to this after drafting the beginning, but i hope you enjoy anyway!
***
There’s something odd that stirs in his chest when you’re around. Crosshair is renowned for his ability to detach himself from feeling things. He doesn’t care enough to acknowledge his own feelings. Not them, not his trauma, not much of anything at this point. There is his vode and the mission. 
The times he allows himself to feel things is when he’s nestled against the curve of a hill, sniper rifle poised on his shoulder, completely in his element with his weapon and the enemy in his line of sight. He’s renowned in the GAR for being able to take out targets at hundreds of feet that most of the natborn snipers would dream of being able to do. 
Crosshair doesn’t particularly care about them, or the regs, or the opinions of others in general. There’s his vode - The Bad Batch - and that’s it. They are the ones who hold his attention and his concern, when warranted.
The regs think he doesn’t have a heart.
He doesn’t really realize he does until you show up. Well, when you do.. the renowned sniper has a startling realization. That heart of his? It’s not nearly as impenetrable as he believed it to be. 
It doesn’t matter. Clones are bred with the thought of not feeling. He mastered that as a cadet. Prides himself on it.
  “Hello Crosshair.”
He’s pretty sure your tiny, bright self that shines like a beacon wherever you go is going to make him contemplate breaking that pride. 
*** 
The first time it happens, he’s angry. Feigns anger. You’re this little slip of a medic - he takes to calling you Slip which makes his brothers laugh - assigned to be with The Bad Batch by the GAR. They’re not particularly fond of GAR officers in general, but you were assigned to them due to their dire lack of a medic and the fact that they encounter some of the most dangerous missions out of all the clone battalions that serve on the front lines of a war. 
He’s exiting The Havoc Marauder when you sprint past him, hopping up onto the tips of your toes - he sees a flash of black, probably your medical wear you’d donned when tending to Hunter in the med bay - before pressing the ghost of a kiss against his cheek and laughing brightly as you ran away.
Crosshair is too stunned to move. Tech knows his brother, knows how he’s been told that feeling is a weakness, how he used to get harassed by the regs during their cadet years for it. 
He also knows how starved of contact they all are. How badly they crave people. You don’t take crap from anyone - much less them, despite how tiny you are you are also assertive and firm - if you don’t agree, they will know it. If you think they’re being reckless and careless with how much their lives matter to you, they will know it. 
  “Cross?” Tech knows better then to lay a tentative hand on his shoulder, but Crosshair shakes himself out of his reverie to face his younger brother. “C’mon. Our weapons need to be modified and cleaned.” 
The barrels of his sniper rifle are caked in dust. 
He tries not to think of you as he disassembles and reassembles that rifle until his fingers hurt and his eyes are crossing and the pieces are gleaming with how hard he’s scrubbed them, but he’s-kriff. 
Kriff. 
***
The second time, he actually snaps and you’re on the receiving end of it. It’s not intentional, but when you do it in the aftermath of a mission that nearly took his head from a small group of commandos he nearly missed, he’s seething with his failure and you’re just trying to help, he knows that. 
He’s still mad. 
  “Cross-” Your eyes betray your fear as his skin still burns from your kiss, and the Sniper glowers as he pins you against the wall of the Marauder. The brothers have left the premises to resupply in the marketplace over the hill, and the two of you had offered to remain behind to watch the ship and your bounty. “Crosshair, put me down. Now.” 
It’s not often you use that tone of voice with him. Maybe he did step over the line. 
  “Slip.” He snaps. “I need you to-” 
  “What? Need me to what?” 
You’re angry too. He hasn’t been able to read your intentions since you joined their merry band of misfits, but Crosshair has always been the most perceptive - beside Hunter - and so he sees you. Everything you do. The gentle way you approach The Batch as the humans they are, not just the clones, and how you always know what’s wrong before you even tend to them. The way you never talk down to Wrecker. The way you listen to Tech babble on incoherently about something you don’t particularly care about. When Hunter needs a second pair of eyes and it’s 3 AM, you’re so bone tired you could sleep for years, but you drag yourself out of bed just to help him. 
Remarkable. 
  “I need you to stop making me feel things.” He harshly releases you from his grasps and begins pacing the ground in front of where you stand. “This thing you keep doing, have been doing since we met you, I-I need it to end. It’s driving me insane!” 
Your frown makes his head spin. He’s thought long and hard about this, about how you somehow wormed your way into his head and remained there, and the last thing he wants to do is hurt you. 
 “Crosshair.” You reply calmly. “In case you are blind, did you ever consider that I might like you?”
His first question, almost immediately: why? What the kriff is there to like about him? 
  “Well, uh.. no.” 
  “Secondly-” 
  “Where was the firstly?” 
You glare daggers at him to shut him up. His lips quirk upward in the barest hint of a smile. He doesn’t really smile.. not the way you probably want him to. “Cross, you’re remarkable. Really. I talked with Hunter about this when we met because there’s just something about you that’s so alluring..” You move forward and tilt your head upward to meet his gaze. “I can’t figure out what it is. Is it the saltiness? The armor? The way you can just take out people without so much as a breadth of hesitation?” 
  “Slip, did you just call me salty?” 
  “Yes. What are you going to do about it?” 
You are totally caught off guard when he looks back and forth, glances down, and then kisses you on the cheek.
  “That.” 
Hunter asks you upon their return from the market if your cheeks have been burned by the sun because they’re so red. Meanwhile, Cross sits inside of the Havoc Marauder and smirks as he peers down the sight of his sniper rifle and begins to disassemble it. 
If a kiss was all it took to shut you up, he would’ve gotten over his impenetrable heart - the same heart you wormed your way into and made a home there - and done it a long time ago. 
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shadowling-guistical · 4 years ago
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rubberband heartbreak
"What kind of— What kind of person says that?! What kind of monster is grateful for their soulbond snapping?“ Roman says, wondering.
And all Janus could hear was his baby brother’s desperate, unhinged laugh as he clawed at his own skin.
And all he could see was red. Angry, smoldering red.
(Janus didn’t think the overdramatic prick even saw the fist coming.
***
Virgil had a soulmate, once. What a beautiful, awful, painful thing. (READ ON AO3 HERE) SHIPS: Established LMP, Established Demus, Past Virgil/OC, eventual LAMP, Eventual Remile
WARNINGS: Minor Character Death, Domestic Violence, Angst
--- It would have been roast chicken again that night. It was in the oven, sitting on a bed of potatoes and carrots that perfumed their little house with a smell that was honestly heavenly. No matter how many times he had that exact meal, he thought he could eat that meal for the rest of his life. He’s pretty sure he will. It was the only thing his soulmate knew how to cook without requiring an emergency call to the firestation, after all. He wouldn’t trade it for anything. 
A bottle of semi-fancy wine was cooling in a bucket of ice on the counter, just waiting to be opened. It was the exact type that they had drunk when they made their courtship official, and the nostalgia and memories only made the taste that much sweeter. 
Fresh flowers sat prettily in a vase on the kitchen table in a bunch. Violets, his favorite. His soulmate had bought home earlier while all twitterpated. 
It was the perfect set up for a date night-- Simple. Elegant. Romantic. Everything someone could ask for in a night in with their soulmate.
And despite all that, all Janus Sanders wanted to do was vomit. Or maybe find a seat. No, a fainting couch. Yeah, he might need a fainting couch.
He briefly wondered if those are still a thing. It should be. God it should be. if the lightheadedness that began lapsing at the edge of his brain were any indication, he really needs it right about now. He nervously tapped a finger on whatever surface it met with, which turned out to be the countertop of their kitchen island. At the back of his head, he registered his knees slightly shaking, and his heart trying to pound out of his ribs. He really should have sat down before he answered the call.
“Yes…” He spoke into the phone that had been glued to his ears ever since the call came, just minutes before the start of his date night with Remus. He spoke without really registering what he was saying. The buzzing in his brain prevented him from catching anything other than bits and pieces of gentle concern and medical jargon. However, icicles are still icicles. And no matter how hard the person at the end of the line tried to soften the blow, each one still dug into his chest. It pierced so harshly and the coldness spread downwards to his stomach.
Urgent.
Emergency treatment.
He needed his family.
He needed them.
With just a phone call, Janus’ whole evening grinded to a halt, “I see. Thank-- right. Of course. We’ll-- We’ll come down. Yes. Thank you. He-- I understand. Goodbye,” Before Janus could even recover, before he could even process the fact that--
“Janus?”
Janus blinked. His hand fell limp by his side, and he didn’t even realize that he was still gripping the phone. Oh-- oh, Remus . He didn’t realize that his boyfriend had even come downstairs. How long was he--? “Jan, are you okay?” Remus’ sharp, bright eyes darted at his form, knowing that the answer is obviously a big fat no, “What’s going on snakey? Is it Remy?”
The icicle twisted, and for a moment Janus thought it must have melted out of his eyes. Oh god-- oh god, Remy . How will he explain this to Remy?--
It would wreck him. Absolutely destroy him when he finds out.
Because he was--
He was…
Janus’ breath came out shaking. His hands even more so. His composure took the worst of it.
They were supposed to protect him. They were supposed to be there for him and annoy him and beat up anyone that dared look at him the wrong way. Because they were his-- They were his-- “I--” He swallowed around the weight lodged in his throat. He must looked as dazed as he felt, because Remus’ expression turned from cautious curiosity into grim concern, “I don’t--”
Janus never babbled before. He was never at a loss for words. He always know what to say-- He should know what to say-- Because he needed to call Remy-- He needed to explain--
The thought was squeezed out of him when Remus took him into his arms. The hug that Remus suddenly enveloped him in shouldn’t feel as relieving as it did. He shouldn’t have felt that small, that unsure nor that scared. But Janus felt everything buzzing in his brain melt away as he felt his soulmate squeeze him.
“Hey...Hey...Shh...It’s cool. It’s okay,” He felt Remus’ breath against his ear and this time, he didn’t shiver out of fear,  “Breathe...That’s it. I won’t have you asphyxiating anywhere else other than in bed, you hear me?” Involuntarily, like Remus always somehow does, he dragged the smile out to Janus’ lips. And in return, he grinned as well. Remus dragged a thumb across Janus’ cheekbones, “There’s that pretty smile. Can you tell me? Or do you want me to--?”
Janus felt a shudder ripple through his chest, and he shook his head. He didn’t need to. He didn’t need to rely on their soulbond for this. He didn’t want to submit Remus to the knot of thoughts and panic that were all tangled up in his brain right now. “That’s okay. Okay Jan,” He felt his large hands rub his back, up and down. But Janus shook his head. “It’s--everything’s not okay, Remus. Far from it--” He brought up a hand, gripping the fabric of Remus’ shirt, “My brother’s-- Virgil’s in the hospital. His-- His soulbond broke,”
---
Remy had come to their home a little over an hour later, looking very much similar to Janus did. Remus noticed the pinched, spooked look on the eldest Sanders’ face, now that his sunglasses were perched up on the crown of his head. He had smiled wanly, and offered a reassuring hand on Janus’ shoulder. But it was brittle and unsure. Both of them reeling from what Remus assumed was shock.
Janus however, then stepped closer. He nearly folded into his brother, who immediately inhaled as if he was punched. Immediately, Remy wrapped his arms and squeezed. Remus, for all the times he would say something at the most inopportune moments, had let him. And Janus couldn’t have thanked him enough. No judgement. No comments. Just someone who wanted-- needed, his big brother right now.
“You know, I can come with? Take turns driving,” Remus offered, once Janus slowly let himself unlatch from Remy. He cleared his throat and shook his head, starting to put on his composure like a mask.. The effect was instantaneous. Janus' back straightened, and the perfect picture of calmness rippled through him like waves on water.  Remus felt his heart twitch in his chest when Janus did. Did his soulmate really want that now? He barely allowed himself room to breathe
“No. It’s okay. We’ll manage. It’s...It’s a family matter, Remus. I’m not sure-- I’m not sure if it’s the best time, right now,” “We’ll call whenever we can,” Remy promised, as Remus helped haul Janus’ duffle bag into the trunk of Remy’s car. He didn’t need to, really, it was only filled with some spare change of clothes and toiletries but...It was still a nice gesture. Before they were set to leave, Janus hugged Remus one last time. The hug that Remus tugged him into nearly made Janus melt and his composure shift. His soulmate was all gangly limbs, bony and sharp. But in this warm skeleton cage, Janus never felt more safe. Remus was like that, Janus had realized. Unlike his twin, his gestures of romance were...A lot more subtle. A lot more tame, actually, compared to the larger than life person that Remus always was. And on the verge of entering a storm, Janus couldn’t help but revel in the stability that Remus unwittingly always provides.
“You’re stuck with me,” Remus smiled, easy and teasing as he nudged Janus’ chin with his knuckle.
The rattling inside his chest petered out, as if Remus was sapping away his worries about Virgil with just a touch. For the first time, each second doesn’t feel like it’s one moment closer to losing Virgil anymore. There was a storm on the horizon, but it hadn’t rained yet. The clouds will part, and the sun will shine again.
Something deep inside him loosened, a knot of tension slowly unravelling.
It’ll be okay.
It’ll be okay.
Virgil will be okay.
“Not going to get off me that easily, Squid,” Janus replied with a lot more warmth than he’d ever let anyone else hear. He’d keel over and perish before anyone else at his firm knew that he’s a sap. He has a reputation, for god’s sake.
“If you start making out, I’m leaving without you!” Remy called, already slipping into the driver’s seat. A hand reached for the coffee he grabbed on the way there, taking a blasé sip. Janus sighed and finally parted from his soulmate. Once he was secured, Remy handed him the coffee and smiled, looking a lot more fragile than Janus had ever seen him. Even more than the time…
“Let’s go get our little brother, shall we?”
Despite the circumstances, something in his heart swelled.
Little brother. They were getting their little brother back.
---
“He’s probably going to be okay, right?”
The hospital loomed, large and daunting. It was a behemoth of a building, stark white against the sky, which was a gunmetal grey from the threat of an approaching storm. Janus felt like he was 20 again, young and viper-tongued. But instead of angry and bristling, he’s...desperate. Out of his depth. Hurting and worried and strung out. Maybe it was the long drive talking. Maybe it was the prospect of seeing Virgil again, years later after their messy goodbye.
The only thing preventing Janus from nervously cracking his knuckles right now, just meters away from the entrance, was the musical notes playing right at the back of his head. It was faint, and he could still just ignore it over the din of people. The chords were familiar, the lyrics faint. But it settled in his bones and stopped it from rattling. Remus must have been listening to a lot of music today, he faintly thought. His soulmate’s playlist had looped back from Vocaloid, to the Hamilton Polka, and back to Video game OSTs for the third time now. Despite the questionable choice of a playlist, Janus appreciated it just the same. That feeling of having one person that was always thinking of you, connected through musical notes and voice and thoughts.
“I don’t know…” Remy admitted. Janus didn’t point out his habit of absentmindedly rubbing his bicep. He didn’t need to judge someone for trying to leech some comfort from a soulmate he hadn’t had the pleasure to meet yet. “I think we just need to be prepared,
---
They said that Virgil laughed.
He had laughed as he did it. Agony must have ripped through him top to bottom. It would have fizzed and flared back up again- leaving him a writhing mess on the floor of his own home. It burnt through him and made him suffer. Yet, he had laughed .
Virgil laughed.
He was still laughing when they got to him , the nurse had said.
Janus clutched his nephew as he slept, his own heartbeat beating in time with his pounding head. He remembers Virgil’s laugh. The cackle, a pleased, borderline mischievous sound.
Now, he wishes he could wipe his head clean from it.
Thomas suddenly whimpered, and Janus fussed over him again. No matter what lullaby he sang, or any reassurance he whispered to the toddler, nothing had erased the sudden cold dread that had washed over him after they knew. Nothing could stop the child from crying out and demanding for the comfort of his father. Nothing could bleach Janus’ brain from the sight of those awful, black cracks spreading out on Virgil’s skin like Lichtenberg scars.
After they found out what that bastard --
That absolute beast of a conniving, cowardly, sniveling bastard--
Janus pulled in a raspy gasp, trying hard not to let a single sob go through his composure. Not when it took this much effort to make sure he was calm enough to take care of Thomas. His nephew had spent the time with medical personnel since they were both brought in, and Janus wanted to make sure that wouldn’t happen again. The boy needed to be with family.
His family.
Their family. Because Thomas is his nephew. His only nephew--
… Oh stars, he had a nephew.
They came in expecting their brother, only to meet their nephew. Janus didn't feel ready for this. He needed to-- He need to be--
Janus squashed the pained noise in his throat. Ready? What a thought. he would laugh if he wasn't so haunted by Virgil's. He isn't ready. His baby brother’s soul had snapped in two, frayed into anguish and Virgil had laughed.
And there was absolutely nothing-- nothing that could prepare them for this.
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lov3nerdstuff · 4 years ago
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Voluptas Noctis Aeternae {Part 7.25}
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*Severus Snape x OC*
Summary: It is the year 1983 when the ordinary life of Robin Mitchell takes a drastic turn: she is accepted into Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Despite the struggles of being a muggle-born in Slytherin, she soon discovers her passion for Potions, and even manages the impossible: gaining the favor of Severus Snape. Throughout the years, Robin finds that the not quite so ordinary Potions Professor goes from being a brooding stranger to being more than she had ever deemed possible. An ally, a mentor, a friend... and eventually, the person she loves the most. Through adventure, prophecies and the little struggles of daily life in a castle full of mysteries, Robin chooses a path for herself, an unlikely friendship blossoms into something more, and two people abandoned by the world can finally find a home.
General warnings: professor x student, blood, violence, trauma, neglectful families, bullying, cursing
Words: 5.2k
Read Part 1.1 here! All Parts can be found on the Masterlist!
______________________________
Two minutes after the elaborate goodnight wishes, the five girls were finally on their way down to the dungeons. Cas was babbling away as always, entertaining both Melissa and Lisa to the fullest, while Jorien and Robin merely listened and observed as they followed behind. The three girls up front barely made it down the spiral staircase, giggling as they were, but not even the gloomy darkness of the dungeon hallways could bring the calm and quiet of the night into their conversation as they happily chatted on and on about the many highlights of the dance. Thus it wasn't surprising when a minute later nobody took notice of Robin's quiet yelp as she was whisked away from the group in a crossing of one gloomy hallway with an even darker one.
The adrenaline in Robin's blood skyrocketed immediately, the yelp dying on her lips in a broken moment of initial surprise. Then the familiar arm around her waist and the comforting scent of home quenched every spark of fear or panic in her mind.
She found herself pressed against the cold stone wall a second later, kept in place by the weight of his body while his soft lips on her own demanded a fire she gladly returned, and every last cell in her body lit up in roaring flames as an immediate response. Her heart was bursting, drumming furiously against her ribcage while its echoes pulsed through her entire body in sheer blissful heat. Oh bloody fucking hell, this was magnificent… breathtaking, in every sense of the word. And it still was terribly dangerous, even here now in the dark. That, perhaps, was the only flaw of the moment, their one and only honest mistake.
"Are you aware that you are way too good at this?" Snape finally asked, ragged breaths brushing against Robin's skin as he leaned his forehead against hers. Upon this she smiled, but her eyes stayed closed as she found herself too overwhelmed to open them. She didn't need to; she could feel him, his presence, his warmth, his entire being…
"Really?" She finally let out a humoured and incredulous huff in reply. How could she be any good at this if she had never kissed anyone before? Was her lack of experience really not all that noticeable?
"Without a doubt. I would never allow myself to get this carried away in a school hallway of all places if you didn't enchant me beyond any measure. Beyond any reason."
"Sev-..." She was cut off by his lips, both in word and thought and she lost every string of reason that had just started to gather back together. Oh screw experience, they were way too good at this to even think of that. She must be doing something very right if he couldn't stop this madness either, couldn't resist the growing addiction.
It once again was the noise of people crossing by in a hallway close by that broke them apart, and only then Robin noticed for the first time how much it hurt to stand on one's tiptoes for an extended amount of time. For a kiss like that, she still would do it again and again any time.
"I should apologise for seizing you like that without your permission." He finally said when the retiring students' laughter and chattering had faded in the distance, then he took a step backwards to give Robin her space as well. "Who knew I could act like a dunderhead myself, given the chance."
"Oh, I knew." Robin couldn't help grinning as she stepped away from the wall, which earned her a small glare and a not-smirk. "And as much as I understand and appreciate your point, you do have my permission. Besides, where would be the point in suddenly pressing me against a wall and kissing me senseless if it came with a warning?"
Snape didn't look at her, but the corners of his lips were twitching and she could tell with utmost certainty that he was amused even though being rather flustered at the same time. It was surprisingly adorable, really, and made her wonder if he had never been in such a situation before. Well, not exactly the same situation, obviously, but still…
"I have wanted to do that for a long time now." He replied to her surprise, and his eyes were back on hers, dark and intense and every last idea of adorable was gone. Instead, his gaze made Robin shiver in delighted excitement. "But never would I have thought that it would be better than anything I was even vaguely able to imagine."
"You imagined kissing me?"
"More often than I should admit to, if I want to keep some last scraps of dignity at least."
"I've seen you lying in a muddy river before, as well as being stuck in a giant cobweb. And if that's not enough, we were just snogging in the hallways like the hormonal teenagers we scold for doing the very same. I think it's a bit too late to worry about your dignity with me." Robin chuckled, louder even when Snape rolled his eyes exaggeratedly, but her heart soared when he smiled again after all. "We really should get out of the hallways though, I'm tired of fearing people might run into us. I really don't see how the danger of getting caught can be appealing to someone, for me it's just nerve-wracking."
"I could not agree more."
After taking two seconds to straighten out their appearances just in case, they made their way through the gloomy darkness side by side like they had done so often by now, with the small but significant change that the accidental touches, the brushing of hands and bumping of arms were more intentional than not this time, and both knew it to be their fullest intention as well. Robin couldn't keep the grin off her face, but she bit her bottom lip to tone it down as much as possible. She hadn't felt so much giddy excitement in one night since… well, ever really. And when they walked right past the office, then past the lab as well, a liquid lightning ran from the top of her head down her spine to her very core and every cell beyond. These new rushes were only an additional layer to the bottomless adoration and affection that had been there for years now, to the deeply rooted love she held for him, but it was a heavenly addition nonetheless. It certainly gave the term 'allconsuming' an entirely new meaning, an inevitably deeper one.
It was only when Snape stopped in the crossing of hallways that on one end led to the common room and to his rooms on the other that Robin's smile faltered. With a confused frown she didn't bother to hide she came to a halt as well, looking up at him with the question clear as night in her eyes so she wouldn't have to say the words. It was safer than admitting to being as boldly assuming as she had been… somehow she hadn't doubted that they would at least have a coffee. Like always. Or… did he need space now, with everything that had happened? After all the days and nights they had spent together, he didn't really strike Robin as the kind of person who would need space, not from her. From others, yes, always if possible, but he hadn't sent her away in years, rather on the contrary really. So-...
"I don't know if this could be considered a good idea by any means." He said in a calm tone, reluctant almost while yet he reached out for Robin's hand and pulled her closer to himself. Always the contradiction, that man…
"And why wouldn't it be a good idea?" She asked in return, calm encouragement colouring her voice now that she knew the reason for his hesitation wasn't a sudden wish for distance. Indeed, as if to prove that point, he interlaced their fingers and drew her closer the last bit in a single move of gentle elegance.
"Because if you come with me right now, I won't let you leave again until we are late for breakfast." He replied quietly and yet in that intense sincerity that had Robin's heart skipping beats while her eyes were glued to his. Gods, he really did mean it… excitement struck her like lightning, her heartbeat posed the thunder.
"I can live with that." She managed to say in a breath, her lips curving up into a smile upon the repetition of his earlier words. Then they formed a smirk as she went on. "Bold of you to assume that I'll want to leave for breakfast though."
"Oh, I've never been partial to having three meals per day anyway."
His reply made Robin laugh, then smile up at him brightly and with just a hint of tease. "It's not such a bad idea after all, huh?"
"That would depend entirely on who you ask." He quirked an eyebrow at her with a not-smirk, then walked on down the hallway with a start while keeping hold of Robin's hand. She didn't need to be not-told twice to follow, and was again walking by his side when he spoke on. "I for my part cannot complain, and I honestly don't care about any other opinion but yours beyond that."
"Complaining wouldn't help you at this point anyway, because I have recently discovered the perfect way to bribe you."
"Is that so?"
"Open the door and I'll show you." Robin replied easily but with a teasing smirk no less once they reached his rooms in the bow of the hallway.
"Don't tempt me."
"Isn't that what a temptation is supposed to do?" She quipped while her smirk broadened. "Tempt?"
"You are insufferable."
"Or perhaps tease? Allure? Seduce? Ens-..." She didn't get further when she was pulled through the now open door and into the darkness behind it, barely catching how it was thrown shut again before she found herself tightly trapped against it from the inside. The grin that wanted to form on her lips died a broken second later when she got exactly what she wanted, and yet, as always, so much more.
His lips moved against hers in hunger, returning every bit of passion she gave, and yet there wasn't a hint of roughness in the kiss, no blunt strength which would taint the blissful sensuality. In a spark of boldness or bravery, Robin traced the tip of her tongue over his bottom lip, only for him to gasp against her lips in return. When she wrapped her arms around his neck and did the same thing again, the gasp turned into a silent moan and he pulled her with him away from the door, staggering through the darkness with a baffling certainty until one unfortunate movement of his hand over the hurting spot on Robin's back made her first hiss in pain, then flinch at the intensity of it. He let go of her immediately in return, and Robin's first fathomable thought was a silent curse directed at Morgan for being the cause of what had broken apart this moment. The stupid pain in her back.
"What did I do this time?" Snape asked in honest concern as well as subtle remorse, and a second later the fireplace lit up from a wordless spell, illuminating the remainder of the room in a gentle orange golden glow. They had almost reached the sofa by now, obviously having made their way there before the pain had put a stop to their plans.
"You did absolutely nothing wrong, I promise." Robin immediately gave him a small but reassuring smile, and held onto him so he wouldn't even think about moving away. "It's just that spot on my back that's still hurting ever since Morgan touched it, it really doesn't matter. Don't worry."
"Your back simply started hurting out of nowhere upon his touch during the dance? And he didn't speak a word?" Snape still inquired further, in lingering concern but quite obviously more at ease now that he knew it wasn't his doing that had hurt her at least. Robin had to smile at his sheer inability not to worry about her; it made her heart soar in warmth and adoration all the more. And seeing as he wouldn't stop asking, now that she had brought the mysterious pain to his attention, they might just have to deal with it right now.
"Not a word that was a spell, at least… and yes, he just traced his fingers over my back and that caused a strong stinging and burning that faded a moment later though. Now it hurts whenever someone even comes close to touching it. That's why I flinched so stupidly." She shrugged with a half smile. "Sorry for that."
"Don't apologise for what clearly isn't your fault. I should curse Morgan into oblivion for hurting you right in this instant… but I would rather take your pain away if I can." Snape sighed, then paused for a moment, lost in thought, before he finally spoke up again. "Did it hurt when your back hit the wall? Or the door? Or is it just a hand's touch that hurts?"
The question made Robin frown to herself; she hadn't considered that. The answer she came up with for herself then rendered her frown even deeper. "I believe it's just an actual human touch that causes me pain. It didn't hurt at all when I leaned against whatever surface, and neither does the dress make it sore or anything like that… But you and the girls could hurt me quite a bit by just touching any spot on my back. What does that mean?"
"I have a vague idea." He grumbled to himself at the thought of it, and Robin understood the sentiment only too well in this regard. "Can you touch it without pain?"
"I can try…" She mused and did just that, but even though she only barely could reach the spot with the back of her fingers when she twisted her arm enough, there should have been at least a little sting. But no, nothing, no pain at all. She frowned to herself again. "That's weird. I can't even precisely tell you where it is when it doesn't hurt… and I can touch it without pain. Perhaps it's nothing."
"Magical wounds should not be taken lightly, especially if inflicted by someone as irresponsible as Morgan. We should take you to the hospital wing."
"Or you could look at it here." Robin suggested easily, shrugging with one shoulder as she observed his reluctant but not averse expression. "You know more about the situation with Morgan, about what happened tonight and about me than anyone in the infirmary. I really don't mean to doubt their abilities at all, but I think if it's a magical thing of more or less unknown origin, it falls more into the dark arts anyway, which precisely is the point where I would prefer you to look at it. Who knows, maybe it really is nothing and we're through with it in two minutes… we could save ourselves the time of way. I have other plans for tonight than sitting around the infirmary with a bunch of punch-drunk students."
"Do you?" He couldn't help the smirk on his lips upon that, even though it was clear that he was trying to fight the short lived amusement due to the otherwise serious situation. At least it wasn't serious enough to warrant the complete absence of humour on his end, so that was a relief at least.
"Yeah, actually. I was hoping for a drink and the continuation of where we were interrupted, but I'm still open for further suggestions." She smiled up at him and he rolled his eyes, but the amusement stayed nonetheless, which sufficed to give Robin some more courage. They'd be through with this in no time, they always had been when she'd been injured. "Do you happen to know a spell to undo a million tiny buttons? I haven't found one yet, but if anyone knows such a thing, it would have to be you."
He let out an amused huff, then quirked an eyebrow at Robin. "I believe if there was such a spell, I would have discovered it by now. Every time I tried to invent one myself however, it led to the destruction of the garment rather than the desired result. Therefore I unfortunately have to disappoint you. Why do you ask?"
"Because it would have spared you work." She chuckled, somewhere between humour and embarrassment, the latter of which however she strongly tried to reason against. He'd seen her in various stages of undress over time, and it had never been a big deal. Or had it? Would he think differently of it now than he had over summer? Gods, why was she nervous now?! It wasn't even the kind of situation where she should be nervous, they were just trying to make sure that her back was alright, for heaven's sake! And she still stood with her point that she would rather have Snape looking at her injuries than anyone else, even in complete disregard to the most recent developments between them. This had nothing to do with that, it was just a coincidence. An oddly fitting one, going by the line of events.
Robin resisted the temptation to roll her eyes at herself and her antics and merely turned around so that her back was right in front of him, making an obvious point of what she wanted him to do. This wasn't a movie; plots didn't just fall into place like that. Two things could happen without any obvious correlation between them. She sighed, then focused on the task at hand. "Perhaps I should've worn a dress with a zipper like everyone else, huh? Then again, I wasn't really expecting anyone having to undress me tonight."
She didn't need to look at him to know that he was hesitating, and if she was honest, she couldn't really blame him. Truth was that things were different now, or could be different now, and it was uncharted territory for both of them. Either of them was uncertain what to make of it, afraid to make a wrong move. At least it brought some peace and relief to her mind that he obviously was just as insecure as she was in this new and yet so very familiar moment of innocent intimacy. Even though things like this had happened in the plenty over summer already.
"We're just looking at my back for the damage Morgan did yet again… Just like the times he dislocated my shoulder, or cut open my hand, or-... well, you know what I mean. You've seen me torn up and bloody before, and we've always taken care of it. And I know for a fact that your hands aren't cold, so there really is nothing to worry about, right?" She said in a calm, almost soothing voice, both to him and herself, and contrary to what she had thought, it actually caused an overwhelming wave of ease and comfort to wash over her when he finally started with the first button in the back of her neck. When his fingers brushed against her skin however, her breathing hitched nonetheless while goosebumps covered her skin within a broken second. Perhaps this wasn't entirely like it had been over summer… But comfort and excitement were what it caused yet again, and that really seemed to be a reoccurring theme with them. Their own perfect ambivalence. Home and adventure at once.
It didn't take long at all until the buttons were open down to her waist, just far enough so she could slip the spiky and stiff shoulder parts off her arms, which left her to clutch the front of her dress to her chest quite a bit more tightly than necessary. Robin blamed the neckline of her dress for making her forsake any kind of bralette… It left her upper body entirely bare now, and that in return was the reason why she was clutching the front of the dress to her chest. But then again, she didn't really mind it too much if she was being honest with herself. Having an excuse to show some skin… forcing her to be bolder than she was… it really was terribly exciting for some stupid reason. A lucky coincidence, even if a bit poorly timed. Most of all however, Robin liked the reaction she was getting from the man behind her, judged by the fact that his heartbeat had doubled in speed by the time her back was exposed to him almost entirely. There it was again, that overwhelming excitement that came with the power she seemed to have over him… the knowledge that her mere being did such things to him. But they were just looking at her back for the spellwork done on her, and she gave herself a mental slap to stop pondering how they could go on from there. Unrelated situations, and all that…
"So… how does it look?" She finally asked in a surprising calmness, considering that her every sense was heightened to the extreme. Gods, she wanted him to touch her skin again, even if it would hurt… No, bad thought, bad Robin! There was work to do, and she was getting distracted!
"Like three hand-length cuts that seem to have scarred. Did you ever notice those before? They look far older than just a few hours." He mused in return, then carefully pulled Robin closer to the fireplace by her elbow. She didn't resist and merely walked backwards blindly until she was in the direct light of the fire, and thereby also in the reach of its warmth. He stopped her there, and for a moment she wondered if he needed the light or if he had just noticed the goosebumps on her skin. Duh, obviously he had… they were hard to miss, even if they weren't at all caused by the cold. Either way, his hand lingered on her arm, and that was even more welcome than the fire's warmth.
"Actual scars? I don't think I've had them before, no. And truth be told, you probably would've seen them before if they had been there for longer." She finally remembered to reply, then frowned to herself. "And in addition to that, I can't remember ever getting severely injured on the back. Other than the thing with the bludger in fifth year, that is… I never really knew exactly how badly I hurt myself there, and I never dared to ask."
"Badly enough to have me terrified of your impending death."
"Oops…" She breathed rather lamely, then chuckled to herself almost apologetically. "I guess passing out in the infirmary right in front of your eyes didn't help much with that."
"No. Neither did it prepare me for the instance last summer where you actually came close to death when you passed out on my doorstep." He said in a sigh, then the hand on Robin's arm vanished as he spoke on. "Let us ensure that it won't happen again and find out what that pest of a man did to you this time. Tell me when the pain becomes noticeable, yes?"
Robin only hummed in agreement, and jumped a second later when he placed a hand on her shoulder this time, in a gentle touch that had her melting right on the spot. Slowly and with just enough pressure to be noticeable at all, his fingers danced across her skin, down to her shoulder blade and over her spine, tracing three lines at last with a bit more pressure. Robin had to bite her lip to keep in both a sigh of bliss and a whimper of pain. For some odd reason these two were currently very hard to tell apart in that they both caused an echo of his touch, a heat pulsing through her in the rhythm of her heartbeat.
"Didn't that hurt at all?" He asked with a frown practically ingrained in his tone, as well as confusion in the plenty, and Robin had to call defeat to circumstance.
"Oh. Yes, it did. Sorry, I really should have said something." She admitted in a quiet voice, then got a grasp of herself and continued on a little louder. "But I didn't want you to stop, so I kind of… forgot speech over the overwhelming feeling of having your touch on my back at all."
"You do make it very difficult for me to focus on the problem at hand when you say things like that."
His words brought a smile to Robin's face as it suddenly eradicated the nervousness, and she was only glad that he couldn't see it. "I'm sorry."
"You're not."
"True, I'm not." She couldn't help chuckling at her own half-hearted attempt to fool him, and even more at his trenchant ability to see right through her. "But I'll try to focus on the problem now instead of how amazing your hands feel on my skin."
"Robin…" He warned her quietly, but she could still hear the smirk in his voice, and that's when she couldn't help laughing.
"It's really not my fault!" She protested, and almost would've dropped her arms in a grand gesture if she hadn't remembered just why she was holding her dress in place in the very last second. This entire situation was as ridiculous as it was dangerous as it was wonderful. "You try focusing on anything beyond the tingles when your entire body is a goddamn wildfire!"
"I am trying right now, and you're not making it any easier. The sight of you alone is distracting enough."
"Just that little bit of skin is supposedly doing to you what your touch does to me? Sorry, but I sincerely doubt it."
"You shouldn't." He replied entirely seriously now, and the mere tone of his voice was enough to make Robin shiver again. "It does not take naked skin or fancy gowns for me to think of you as far more than simply ‘delectable’. You are nothing short of the most breathtaking creature I have ever been blessed to see, to stay with the trivial matter of physical appearance for once. But indeed, while I could not care less for others' looks and garments, you never fail to enchant me entirely with any of yours, and seeing as I have previously not had the opportunity to see quite so much of your skin, it does affect me quite strongly now at long last."
Robin's heart skipped a beat, then set into a steady gallop that made it delightfully hard to breathe. But for some reason, the words on her lips did not care for that at all. "You make it very difficult for me to focus on the problem at hand when you say things like that." She mirrored his statement, smiling to herself at the thought. "But do you actually mean it or are you just trying to get revenge on me by equal terms?"
"Both, obviously, but the latter is rather a lucky side effect of the former. And since we are discussing it already, you can call me blind if you will, but I do actually find your hair very attractive on any day, especially because it is a perfect mess." He answered easily, while his fingers continued to trace irregular patterns over the injured part of her back that seemed to hurt more and more by the minute. "Even though I very much appreciate the recent absence of the pineapple scent."
Robin found that she didn't mind the pain, especially not when his reference to her words from earlier this evening as well as the dreaded pineapple made her laugh, and the knowledge that he did, in fact, mean all of those things he'd said made her skin tingle pleasantly. He never made shallow compliments; when he deliberately said something nice for once, one could be sure that he meant it to the fullest.
"I think that might be among the loveliest things you have ever said to me." She smiled after a moment, when her soaring heart would let her speak up through the haze of emotions. "Directly said to me, that is. You say a lot of nice things when you don't mean to."
"Don't get used to it. What a crazy world would we be living in if I started saying nice things regularly now… It would entirely destroy the efficiency and purpose of my compliments." He scoffed in obvious sarcasm and tease, while placing his second hand on her shoulder to keep her in place for whatever he was doing.
"You're an idiot, Sev-..." Robin's words and laughter were cut off with a start when Snape placed his other hand directly on the hurting spot on her back, with quite a bit more pressure than before. It caused a pain far too strong for any measure to ripple through her every sense, and a well of tears to spring to her eyes in return. "Ouch! God damn and bloody hell…"
"I might be an idiot, but an idiot who can focus far better when we banter as usual. That seems to have become somewhat of a precondition for me to be able to work efficiently." He returned, then removed his hands from her entirely before he spoke on in a much more tainted tone. "I apologise for having to hurt you, but in order to undo the spell before it became even more dangerous, that unfortunately was inevitable. Now however, the pain should be gone once and for all in just a moment."
"Wait, you… you know what Morgan did to me and just… undid it like that?" Robin turned around to face him with a deep frown creasing her brows in an instant. "Is that what you were doing while we talked?"
"Yes."
"And you didn't bother telling me?! At least a little warning, perhaps?"
"I had the choice between distracting you by making you laugh and thereby forget about the pain I was unfortunately causing in the process, or to further said pain even more by talking about Morgan and his vile doings." He replied so easily that it made perfect sense now, that it appeared to be the most obvious solution ever. "As you see, it wasn't even a choice to be made."
"Thank you. That… was a really clever thing to do, actually." Robin sighed and gave him a soft smile, then took a moment to appreciate how the shadows of the flames danced across his skin before she spoke on. "So… no more pain for now?"
"Not as far as I can tell, at least."
"Let's find out for sure then, shall we?"
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gumnut-logic · 4 years ago
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Thunderfam Appreciation Post
I’m giving this a new post to prevent scroll city, but the original and several reblogs can be found by clicking the above link. Also, it’s an excuse to post a piccy of Virg cos any excuse, really :D
Many thanks to @willow-salix for writing this question list :D
Before I start, I just want to say that I value every member of this fandom. I’m often hopeless at communicating in group settings so I don’t speak to many peeps, but that is my failing, not anyone else’s. You are an amazing group and you have supported me and each other just brilliantly over the last nearly three years that I have been hanging with you guys. Thank you ever so much for all your wonderful support and encouragement. I’ve had so much fun and created so much stuff…you guys are amazing. Thunderfam rock!
Please note that my memory is pathetic and I will fail to mention everyone. Please do not take any offence if you aren’t listed below. That does not mean I don’t value you, I do, it just means I have swiss cheese between my ears.
-o-o-o-
Your favourite writer of your favourite boy.
@i-am-chidorixblossom  You are a whumper and comforter after my soul. You speak the Virg :D @vegetacide I adore your turn of phrase and your description is to die for.
The person who's stories you will always read.
I try to read most fics that come across my dash, but there are a few that have me jumping up and down. @i-am-chidorixblossom , @vegetacide , @tsarinatorment , @scribbles97 , @the-lady-razorsharp , @janetm74 Of course, I regularly fail at this as some of you write a huge amount of fic and I am often playing catch up, but fic!
Who wrote the first fic you read in this fandom.
I landed on FF.net back in May 2018. I immediately ran into @the-lady-razorsharp who I knew from another fandom ten years prior and she was absolutely wonderful, drawing me in and introducing me around. I gobbled up several of her fics in the process.
Person you can talk to for the longest without a break.
I am hard to get started, persistence is required, but once started, it is usually hard to shut me up. @scribbles97 @vegetacide and @tsarinatorment have all discovered that. Dangle a Virg, a plotline and stand back.
Person you can't be trusted to be left alone with.
Um, @vegetacide and I have plotted out the entirety of Warm Rain together…poor Virg. Add @the-lady-razorsharp into the equation and Virgil ends up with a beard, dressed in leather and riding a Harley – that was a hilarious evening.  Between @tsarinatorment and @janetm74 Virgil gets grey hairs and has to go rescue Scott – because Scott inevitably ends up in the story :D  @scribbles97 gets the blame for Gentle Rain – expand your horizons she said ::headdesk:: But then there was the time I left one random line about Eos visiting Virgil in the shower and went to bed. I woke up to hilarity and chaos as Thunderfam took the idea and ran with it! Love you guys :D
Person whose fic made you cry the most.
I know there were at least two fics that made me cry, but for the life of me I can’t identify them. I did cry writing my own fic – Flannel – and don’t tend to reread it for that reason. Purupuss traumatised me with A Quiet Day to the point I had to put it down and walk away for a bit ::wails::
Person whose fic made you laugh the most.
I have no idea. I know there are fic out there and I know I’ve read it, but without a complete list of everything I’ve read, I don’t have a clue.
Person whose fic made you think the most.
Aaaargh, I don’t have a master list so can’t remember everything. Staring at my paltry favourites list on FF.net (which was mostly gathered three years ago and never maintained), Purupuss’ ‘Brothers in Arms’ and her whole Quiet series has me wanting to write a Scott-Virgil telepathic fic (and she has given me permission to run with the idea, I just haven’t actioned it yet). Counterpoint by Swallow and Amazon is amazing and likely contributed to Sotto Voce.
Person you have laughed with the most.
I’m really not liking this ultimate one person idea. I’ve laughed with a lot of people in this fandom. I’ve candy cannoned a bunch of you as well :P There has been mad plot cackling, evil conspiring, fic written to stir pots and delight on purpose. Hell, I’ve even written fic that was purposefully a giant virtual hug because I’m so far away that even if half the world wasn’t in isolation, I couldn’t hug most of you. Sure, I talk with some of you more than others, and there is laughter in those chats…oh, god, so much cackling, poor, poor Tracy boys. But then there are also so many smiles both vocalised and not. Thunderfam is one of my happy places. Bring on the belly laughs :D
Your comfort fic that you'll go back and read again on a bad day.
I will often resort to my own fic when I’m really down simply because it helps me get to sleep :D and it is kinda tailored to me ::grins::  (and my memory is that bad I often forget what I wrote anyway – yes, it is that bad) But there are also a few on my FF.net favourites list. Mostly hurt/comfort in a Virg flavour. Cheesycheese, nhsweetcherry, A Small Rescue by Nalina, Breathe Easy and Under the Weather by @loopstagirl – several of hers, in fact – the Virg ones :D Pretty much anything that has Virg fainting and being looked after apparently :D Chiddi and Veggie fic, of course.
Favourite piece of fan art.
I have never been so honoured by artists before. This fandom has some amazing skills and I have been gifted some beautiful works. You guys are amazing (I keep saying it like a broken record, but you are).
Again, I’m stuck on having to list one and I can’t. I think Fanart Appreciation Month in January pretty much summed up my opinion.
Who have you known the longest in the fandom.
@the-lady-razorsharp followed by @vegetacide both wonderful peeps. I can’t miss out on @weirdburketeer either for her amazing support almost from day one.
Favourite OC.
I have to say that I really enjoy reading about Ray from @i-am-chidorixblossom ‘s fics :D He is so gentle and kind and just ::sigh:: Virg likes him lots :D Selene by @willow-salix is, of course, a major presence in the fandom and amazingly written. @hedwigstalons ‘ Claire is lovely.
Person who supports your work the most.
The Thunderfam? There have been some wonderful people who support all the time. @hedwigstalons  @cg29 @janetm74 @weirdburketeer in particular have been amazing support liking and commenting on just about everything I write. I honestly don’t know how they do it. Plus several peeps over on FF.net and Ao3 who support me over there.
And then there are the poor souls who put up with me in chat and listen to my wibblies and whining and character checks and field random chunks of writing that get thrown their way. @scribbles97 @vegetacide @the-lady-razorsharp  @tsarinatorment @i-am-chidorixblossom @onereyofstarlight @godsliltippy  @willow-salix @janetm74 all have had random passages thrown at them at all times of the day and night by a crazy me begging for feedback. Does this work? Is this in character? Am I insane? What the hell is Scott doing? Is this John??? I give up, tell me what to do? Virgil is driving me insane! So, um, yeah
Person who's progress you are the most proud of.
I love those peeps who appear in fandom who start off poking around commenting and generally being lovely and then all of a sudden get out their own pens and start writing and they are frickin’ amazing! Both @janetm74 and @hedwigstalons come to mind in this department. Like holy cow – ‘here is my first fic and I’m not sure’ ::reads it:: Omigod! Where did you come from? That was amazing. Sit down here now, keep doing that writing thing, bloody hell! I think being brave enough to pick up a pen and join in is a major thing :D
Person who's story you think is underrated and should be read by more people.
If I find fic I like, I reblog it and shout about it. What I like is definitely skewed in a Virgil direction and this dictates often what I’m going to read first. I can’t reblog what I haven’t read. So, this equation will always be skewed by ‘reasons I haven’t read a fic’ which mostly involves either Virgil or the fact I’m juggling RL. So, my answer to this is if I think a fic needs to be shouted about, I shout about it.
Something you think people would say about you.
She’s nutty.
Silliest 'thing' you do with someone.
I’ve been known to write fic on the fly directly into chat windows to try and distract peeps going through shitty times.
Favourite pairing you now Stan because of someone's fic.
Virgil/Kayo because of @vegetacide for reasons I have blamed her for multiple times. @the-lady-razorsharp and @weirdburketeer were accessories to the fact.
Favourite headcanon from someone's fic.
Um, Virgil and coffee? I got that from somewhere and it has infiltrated my fic…a lot.
Ultimately, though, I feel most people I interact with contribute to my fic and how I’m feeling. This has been a wonderful experience. I try to return the support as much as I can, but sometimes it is a juggle between writing more, my stupid fluctuating mood, the demands of RL and my own creative drive. I hope I’ve helped a few peeps, because you guys have certainly helped me ::major group hug::
And yes, I hug a lot, because to be honest, I have no other descriptor to communicate how I feel, so you get buckets of hugs :D
Tagging the Thunderfam. Feel free to grab these questions and run with them. You’re all part of the gang whether you write, read, art, gif, screenshot, chat, babble, stare at Virgil all day...I know I do a lot of staring.
Nutty
(Thunderfam rocks!)
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k-laconia-bug1 · 3 years ago
Text
Siblings Reunited
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Things to know before reading this! 1. Luz is the same age as hunter (16) so her and Lance year apart 2. Luz and Lance are Altean 3. Luz went to the garrison but was asleep during shiro rescue therfore was not there for voltron 4. Luz and Lance eyes are the same blue as Allura 5. Allura is Lance and Luz older sister 6. Lance & Luz were adopted and has younger siblings 7. Hunter hangs out regularly at the owl house and gives them information on Belos 8. The demon realm is a planet 9. I used Google translate for Spanish 10. I didn't go to the wiki to see all of lances family's names or how big it is so all names mention is made up, also sorry if there oc haven't binged watched the shows for awhile
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Voltron had just landed in a clearing near the owl house to get more supplies when Lance and Hunk heared a voice they recognized. Hunk turned to look at Lance who had teary eyes, started to run towards her voice leaving other members of Voltron confused and started to run after Lance, everyone but Hunk yelled "Lance wait!"
------------Owl house------------
Luz was teaching hunter Glyphs when she heard people yelling everyone hanging out at the owl house turned toward the sound When suddenly someone she recognized the person that was the reason for being a witch to find them. Twin bright blue eyes froze when met it was like time had stopped Eda confused with a quirked eyebrows her hand on her hip and a finger pointed towards Lance and the member of voltron "So uh you recognize those guys Luz they look human ears are round and everything"
After Eda broke the silence both Lance and Luz ran towards each other crying
"Hermano mayor!" "Hermanita" Lance picked up Luz in a hug twirling her around after a few moments he set her down "Hermanita What are you doing on this planet? Luz wiping her tears away glared at Lance weakly punching his chest "Learning Magic to find you ya big Jerk! Where were you! You know how devastated I was!"
"I know I know.. and I'm sorry Estrella fugaz" he paused for a moment before his eyes harden
"wait how did you get here?" Lance questions
Luz laughs nervously "wellll...I may or may not have gone through a magic door to get my book and..umm ... I decided to learn magic to help me find you.. I also may or may not have destroyed my only way home to save Eda...." King looks around and speaks up "So your Luz Brother?" Luz looking over and blushed embarrassed realizing it wasn't just her brother and Eda infront of the owl house looking at the many confused and curious faces "yeah king his my older brother and big guy in yellow is Hunk and I believe the guy in red is Keith?" Luz pauses thinks for moment. Wanting to take a little sibling revenge on Lance for making her worry and leaving without her that night takes the moment to embarrass her big bro "yeah I'm pretty sure that's Keith Lance wouldn't shut up about how pretty his eyes were or about his stupid mullet!" Both Keith and Lance's face turn to a brilliant shade of red, redder then Eda dress or Keith's lion. "What the hongos taki was that for! LUZ!" Lance screamed embarrassed Luz smiling a bright devilish smile "well that was for worrying me so much" Pidge looked over at Keith who was a frozen in place blushing red still shared look with Hunk a sole promise to tell Luz about the 'Bonding moment' that Lance swears up and down didn't happen and make her a member of the Klance shippers club they already had alot of memebers through out the galaxy not to mention everyone in Voltron Shipped it.
Meanwhile Eda shared a look at the owl house gang that says they just gained memebers of Lunter shippers club.
▪︎▪︎▪︎●●●▪︎▪︎le time skip▪︎▪︎●●●▪︎▪︎▪︎
Everyone at a campfire and trading stories about there the siblings childhood or what happen while they were gone and finished teasing each other Lance gained a serious look "Luz I have something to tell you.. you might get upser but you deserve to know" the owlhouse memebers gained a look of concern and Luz a look or worry with hunter rubbing encouraging circles on her back "soo what is it?" Lance nervous looks down breaths in looks up and rips the metaphorical bandaid off "were not human we were born Altean we're Princess Alluras little siblings our escape pods were lost in space for some time before it crash landed near mom an dad's old house due to natural instinct were shifted to a more human form" Lance who had shifted to his Altean form now sported Snow white Hair and Blue Altean Marks and eyes were a shade brighter and ears shifted to look like a witches ears but somewhat longer watching and freckles to take on a little glimmer to them. Lance Shifting caused her Natural ability to shift to trigger as well by the end of Lance sentence now looked similar to her brother hers ears now look exactly like her brothers Eyes gained the same shade as her brother's just turned to freckles glimmered a bit brighter then her brothers and Altean Marks were Pink not blue and Hair turned the same snow white as her brothers but hers grew down a little and Hair turned a more fluffy
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All things considered was taking it quite well although not realizing she shifted and everyone looking at her amazed at just how much she looked like her brother Hunter who was still next to her was blushing bright red and couldn't help but think she look so much more beautiful in her Natural form not that he didn't think she wasn't beautiful before she just seem to look more comfortable and shine.
Luz who was looking down looked back up " I knew we were adopted but.. I didn't think we were... alien" Lance who was smiling fondly at his sisters Shifting into her Natural form without her noticing he noticed she already looked more comfortable his Mama would always comment how they never completely relaxed she would always try to get them to relax too spa days, movie nights the works it wasn't just they're Mama either it was the whole family that would try smiling at the thought if Mama and His Siblings were to see how they look now the twins Hugo and Hannah would probably grab onto there ears there older sister Cana would ruffle there hair jealous and amazed at how fluffy and soft it is his second oldest sister Marie would absolutely be inlove with how shiny there freckles are marveled at how they look like constellation in the sky like the astrologist she is there older brother Coco or Cole Much like Cana ruffle our hair and demand that we grow it out like his was Bonnie wouldn't care at all just demand they teach her stuff about space and the possible sea creatures they saw she was always giddy to learn new things from her older brothers and sisters Connie the youngest of all his siblings was just a baby probably out of the baby babble stage Hinata should be in his first year of High school he would just cling to us demand that we play a few rounds of volleyball with him on the beach I wonder if he made his high-school tean? I also wonder if the other set of twins in the family Derek and Danna got Captin and Co captain in there schools swim team or if there cousin they were closest too Marinette finally got her name in the fashion industry "your thinking about them aren't you?" Luz spoke with sense of knowing and understanding "yeah I was thinking on how they would react to our charming~ good looks!" Everyone smiles at that sentence "we should get to bed soon though I know how cranky you get Luz" Luz deadpan and looks at him "your the same exact way how many times did Coco get bruised by a pillow from you throwing it?" Lance's eye twitched "well I'm not the one that gave Marie the black eye with the soft dog toy" Hunter speakes up "How do you do that!?" Lance and Luz both look over at Hunter and talks in unison "each don't really know we always been a bit stronger then normal maybe it was from helping Auntie Sabine and Uncle Tom around the Bakery?"
With that the Siblings that could pass for twins went back to arguing ... few days later Both Hunter and Keith got Shovel talks by their crushes younger/older sibling
Luz had met Allura and loved just as much as she does the rest of her family while also demanding to know Altean Anatomy she doesn't want some kind of nasty surprise
▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎
Hermano mayor—Big/Eldest brother
Hermanita— Sister
Estrella fugaz—Shooting Star
hongos taki—Taki Mushrooms
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