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chronicallylatetotheparty · 4 years ago

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Watching (the Adventures of) Merlin season one on Netflix

Episode One: The Dragon's Call

. . . I feel like going to the capital of the kingdom indiscriminately slaughtering magic users wasn't the best idea.

Why? Well, that guy did just get executed.

And now his mom is mad. You tell that sorry excuse for a king, witch lady.

I don't like Uther, in case it was unclear.

Wait... if you could teleport why not just grab your son and ditch before he loses his head? Literally.

Oh, wow. Arthur is a dick.

Morgana. We have no choice but to stan tbh.

Dragon, you're really rubbing me the wrong way.

That's right Merlin! We need more than Because Destiny Says So!

Where did the spiderwebs come from? That sleeping spell gives me Sleeping Beauty vibes.

Ah, yes. The old drop-the- chandelier-on-the-villain trick. :(

If she went after Uther instead of Arthur I would have no complaints.

Manservant? You call that a reward for saving your son?

Episode Two: Valiant

Snake!Shield

Oh, he's gonna- Yup, dead. That's what happens when you deal with knights who cheat.

Where did that guy even get a magic shield in the first place?

Is there a thriving magic black market or something?

I love Guin.

. . . I feel like Sir Valiant didn't think this through. If bite marks are visible.

Ugh, you're the worst Uther.

It's only the second episode! Did you forget who saved your son already?

Stop being a jerk Arthur.

Lol. Merlin bringing a dog statue to life in order to practice for the Snake!Shield.

Bye Valiant!

Episode Three: The Mark of Nimueh

Whatcha up to with that egg, new witch lady?

You gonna poison the water of all of Camelot? Seems like a jerk move.

Dang that's a lot of dead bodies...

No, I like Guin's dad!

Yes! Cure him Merlin!

No! Stop arresting Guin, Uther!

You tell him, Morgana!

That plague monster that hatched from witch lady's egg is creepy.

Dead monster!

Arthur is kinda oblivious to Merlin's magic ngl.

Yay! Guin's free!

What do you know about witch lady Nimueh, Uther? Hmm? Why she want you dead? Besides the obvious reasons.

Episode Four: The Poisoned Chalice

Wow, Nimueh really doesn't like Merlin saving the day.

Wow, Nimueh really orchestrated an entire diplomatic incident in order to kill Merlin while also ensuring Camelot is destroyed by its neighbor. Impressive.

I really like Merlin and Guin's friendship.

Dang. Merlin really drank poison in order to save Arthur.

Merlin saved Arthur's life, Uther! Let him return the favor!

Oh, wow. Arthur really disobeyed his father in order to save Merlin's life.

I didn't know Merlin could cast spells while deathly delirious. And several miles away from him too.

Uther you b****! The antidote is right there! Let Arthur save his friend!

Putting your own son in a cell is such a jerk move.

At least Arthur and Guin manage to sneak the antidote to Merlin.

Quick aside: Internet spoilers say Uther needs to die for Arthur to complete his himbofication- I mean character development. So, if you could get on with that? Thanks!

Episode Five: Lancelot

Wow, that's a very CGI griffin.

Lancelot is so precious- Uh, I mean effective! Saving Merlin and all.

I know, Guin. I know.

Always thought it was a stupid rule to only let nobles be knights.

You're really going to commit magical forgery for someone you just met, Merlin?

I mean, Lancelot is earnest, hardworking, modest, kind despite his tragic backstory and it's his childhood dream to be a knight...

Yeah, I'd commit magical forgery too.

Lol, knocked you on your ass didn't he Arthur? (The second time at least)

I don't remember griffins being man-eaters!

Uther stop arresting people! Ugh, you're such a classist.

Let Lancelot help fight the griffin, Arthur! You need all the help you can get!

Well okay letting him go was nice of you.

Lancelot-Merlin tag team!

Wow. Lancelot really strode in with Camelot's singular braincell by figuring out Merlin has magic.

(The bar is low, okay.)

No, don't take away the braincell! Stay! The griffin was a team effort!

Okay, Lancelot's lawful good tendencies are a little annoying but, hey, nobody's perfect.

Episode Six: A Remedy to Cure All Ills

Edwin, no. Leave Morgana alone.

Oh, beetles! Curse beetles! That's not creepy at all.

Gaius how do you know Edwin?

What diabolical plot are you hatching Edwin? Oh, you're replacing Gaius in the royal court. That's kinda rude.

Merlin's so happy meeting another magic user that isn't trying to kill him (yet).

Le gasp! Uther's purge killed Edwin's parents? WhO cOuLd HaVe fOreSeEn tHis!?

But seriously. No wonder Edwin wants Uther dead.

I know Edwin blackmailed Gaius with exposing Merlin but he also wants to kill Uther!

That gives him a pass in my book.

Gaius no. Let Uther die.

Edwin stop trying to kill Gaius! You're going to-

Yup, here comes Merlin and-

Edwin's dead :(

Well he was trying to overthrow the kingdom. That's... bad... I guess.

Episode Seven: The Gates of Avalon

That title is misleading. It's more of a natural portal/magic lake type thing.

Arthur saves a father and daughter from bandits (Which they hired but shhh)

And they immediately try to put a love spell on Arthur

For human sacrifice purposes of course

Idk why the Sidhe want a human prince's soul -look at him, you don't know where he's been- but that's the price for readmission

I wonder how the dad killed one of his own kind? Was it an accident or...?

Exiling the daughter too makes me suspicious of Avalon's justice system

Evil laugh is a bit out of place for someone who is trying to restore his daughter's immortality

(They are so whiny about being mortal. Hey, we put up with it all the time!)

The fairy-like Sidhe moving in accelerated time so they just look like tiny orbs of light was an interesting touch. The blue faces and razor sharp teeth is not a good look for them, lol

They make Arthur ask to be married ('cause it takes a while for the love spell to go into full blown mind control or something)

Prompting Uther to threaten to kill both of them

(I feel like they didn't think this through)

Morgana admonishes Uther for being the worst

He replies that first love rarely lasts and that Arthur is inexperienced in such things. Plus that Arthur only met the girl yesterday

... I can't believe Uther is the voice of reason this episode

He doesn't get any points though. Due to the whole "threatening to execution his son's 'crush' " thing

The daughter is having second thoughts about using Arthur as a human sacrifice

Dear old dad puts those to rest and they try drowning Arthur in the lake that is/is the portal to, Avalon

Merlin's really leaning into the whole "Cool motive. Still murder.", thing huh?

Like, he did NOT hesitate to blow up both of them

Episode Eight: The Beginning of the End

Why do magic users keep going to Camelot!? The king is trying to KILL YOU!

Wow, this grown ass man is threatened by a literal child... I hate Uther so much

Morgana is the MVP of this episode. I love her

Protect that druid kid!

I feel like you're being paranoid Uther

You tell him Morgana!

Dragon, no. Stop prophesying death and destruction.

Wow, this grown ass dragon is threatened by a literal child...

Aaaand Morgana got caught sneaking the kid out of the city :(

Uther she is your adopted daughter! Stop putting people in cells!

Arthur is gonna sneak him out now?

While Morgana distracts the king?

Yes, excellent. What could possibly-

Merlin stop listening to that destiny dragon! Hearing his voice in your head is no basis for trust!

Cutting it close... Yay! They made it!

Mordred!? MORDRED!?

THAT little boy is Mordred!?

... Okay, I'm more inclined to believe the destiny dragon now

Still think letting him die would be a dick move

Episode Nine: Excalibur

What're you up to with that tomb Nimueh?

Oh! It's some kind of undead knight. Yes.

Throwing down the gauntlet. Pfft! Always thought that was a stupid idea.

Also: that Black Knight literally crashed your party!

Ugh, knights.

Nimueh if you can just teleport into the heart of Camelot while Uther is alone why don't you just stab him? Grab one of those pointy things he likes so much and stab him in the back. Easy peasy!

Stealing this joke but Don't do evil magic kids. It fries your brain cells.

Wait, the Black Knight is Uther's brother-in-law!?

Arthur's mother died in childbirth!?

Uther asked Nimueh to use her magic so he could have Arthur!?

Equivalent Exchange!?

Uther went on a genocidal rampage because he didn't bother with the instruction manual of ancient and powerful magic!?

Actually, that last one is not surprising at all.

I can't believe they're using the Wife in the Fridge trope. That appliance hasn't even been invented yet!

Ooh, Merlin's going to use his magic to destroy the Black Knight so Arthur doesn't have to fight him

As he's killed two knights already

Aaaaand, yup, he's still there. His cloak didn't even catch fire...

Arthur stop being a bastard. It doesn't suit you

Dragon forged sword! DRAGON FORGED SWORD!

Only Arthur can wield it. Yup, got it. How could this possibly go wrong?

Uther drugged Arthur and took his place in the fight... I have mixed feelings about this.

Wait, the dragon was very specific about only Arthur using that super special sword! Oh, snap.

Well at least the Black Knight is dead. Again.

Oh, dragon is not happy.

I know the dragon said "where no mortal soul could find it" but are you sure you wanna throw it into Avalon, Merlin?

Those people were gonna suck Arthur's soul out of his body

Episode Ten: The Moment of Truth

The way this episode title just lies to your face like that...

Oh, you're Merlin's mother! Thought we had an anime protagonists type thing going on

I... would like to say Uther is being unreasonable when he decides not to cross borders to get rid of some bandits. But I can totally see everyone hating him so that's a no go.

Lady, you were in a whole different kingdom. Why for the love of Merlin did you send him to Camelot!?

We're off to save the village! Morgana and Guin are coming too!

A wild Arthur appears!

Morgana better at swordplay than Arthur confirmed!

Merlin! I didn't know you had friends!

Granted he's a bit rough around the edges but

Okay. If it were literally anyone else besides Arthur. I'd say he was right about lords and knights being useless snobs.

Actually. He's right about lords and knights being useless snobs. Ah, that felt great.

Wow, the homosexual subtext is strong with this one.

The girls can tell Arthur came for Merlin.

But get your foot out of his face! I don't care how royal it is!

Look at Guin over here calling out Arthur for being a dick

And talking him into letting the women fight. She's on a roll

Aw, Merlin's friend died. :(

And he took credit for Merlin's tornado (so Arthur wouldn't find out about Merlin's magic)

Episode Eleven: The Labyrinth of Gedref

Lol, that unicorn could use a haircut.

No, Arthur. I said a haircut not an arrow to the chest!

Bad things? What kind of bad things Gaius?

Uther what's the point of having an expert in magical lore if you're not going to listen to him!

And all the crops are dead. Fantastic.

I know it's a magic thing but stating outright that the blight only targets edible plants is still really unsettling.

And the water's turned to sand. Great.

Who're you and how come Merlin is the only magic user that can't teleport?

What kind of tests mister Keeper of the Unicorns, sir?

Arthur I know you don't want to believe it's your fault... But it's totally your fault.

Uther no. People are starving.

You tell him Arthur.

Oh, the "theif" was a test!

Aaaaand he failed the second one. :(

Merlin's got a lot of faith in Arthur.

It's interesting how the Keeper can only direct the curse caused by the unicorn's death. Or rather the trials surrounding the curse, but can't break it himself.

Unicorns have some powerful magic.

The Labyrinth was barely on screen for five minutes! Surely something with Unicorn in the title would be more appropriate?

Arthur drinking a poisoned cup so Merlin could live?

That's some strong parallels right there.

The Keeper of the Unicorns is such a troll! Sleeping potion, hah!

The day is saved, Arthur lies to Uther's face about killing the Keeper and the unicorn resurrects itself.

Still needs a haircut though.

Episode Twelve: To Kill the King

Whatcha up to Guin's dad?

Oh that guy isn't suspicious at all.

You didn't think it was shady when he asked to meet in the middle of the night!?

Philosopher's Stone!?

Wow, the guards found him quickly.

What- No! Don't arrest Guin's dad!

Uther, he's a blacksmith! Stop being paranoid!

Will you stop executing people!? That inn keeper didn't know that guy was a dangerous sorcerer!

No, nononononono! He surrendered! Why did you do that!? Guin's father was important to Morgana!

That's why she gave him the key!

Dragon has his priorities straight.

Shut up, Merlin. You literally blew up a father and daughter for trying to kill one(1) person. (No really, you could see their hands flying off.)

Morgana deserves a little murder. As a treat.

Yes! Get him! Kill the bastard!

No! Why would you make GUIN say that!? Who are you and what have you done with Guin!?🔪🔪

UGH, he literally committed genocide!

The "that would make me as bad as he is" DOES NOT APPLY!

What- Oh, he still has the fairy's staff.

No. Stop it! Let Uther die!

Oh, God, Uther is such an abusive piece of GARBAGE!

Stop! Don't fall for it Morgana!

*sees dagger being pushed closer to Uther's "heart"* Yes! Yes! YES!

*Morgana saves him* NO!

NO!

NOOOOOO!

*inarticulate ranting in the background*

Episode Thirteen:

Okay, the cgi might be getting a little better 'cause the Questing Beast is freaky

Old religion? What is that? And how come it's conveniently absent from the previous episodes?

Dang, they really here just casually gaslighting Morgana like that 😡

Merlin you know Morgana has visions! You couldn't have been a little more careful? She warned you. Now look at Arthur, he's got the heroic death disease

Granted that thing does seem like a handful

Why do you only act like a father when it's a matter of life and death? Why can't you be a father literally any other time!?

"The old religion is the magic of the Earth itself."

Well that sounds fascinating, dragon. Are you going to elaborate? No? Later then?

Soooooo, is the old religion actually a religion or is it a magic? It's really unclear...

"You will be a better king than your father could ever hope to be." Guin, you're back!

I expected a place called the Isle of the Blessed to be less... creepy

Nimueh! Whatcha up to girl? Plotting the demise of a kingdom? Not today it seems

Oh there some Equivalent Exchange type nonsense going on is there?

Arthur you were supposed to be in a coma not listening to Guin!

Oh. Oh, no.

Merlin saying goodbye as he prepares to trade his life for his mother's is 😢😭

Wow, that dragon really knew Nimueh would give Merlin's mother the curse and didn't say anything. The little b*****!

No wonder Merlin's mad at him. Stop breathing fire at him! It's your own fault!

Gaius, no! Not the dead mentor trope!

"You stood by and watched as our friends died." Damn, Nimueh isn't pulling her punches.

Merlin vs Nimueh! Ready? Fight!

Anime protagonist power up! Dang, Nimueh's dead... I feel like that wasn't supposed to happen.

At least no one else is dying. Since Nimueh's death appeased the Equivalent Exchange laws of the old religion.

#bbc merlin #bbc arthur #bbc uther #bbc morgana #bbc's merlin

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harghoes · 4 years ago

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Your Memory is Killing Me.

Pairing: Wolffe x f!reader

Word count: 1854

Warnings: alcohol, grief, not taking care of one’s self, it’s really sad.

a/n: I had this idea stuck in my head after hearing my favorite song. (More Than a Memory by Garth Brooks obvi). It hurt me to think about but I realized it would be a good chance for me to get back into writing things I like! tagging @morganas-pendragons 💓 Enjoy, it’s sad. :)

—-

everyone tells him it’s all in his head. that the image of her isn’t anything but an apparition. he’ll over come it eventually, of course he will, he’s Commander Wolffe of the 104th. he’s the strongest of them all. except, he isn’t that strong. he’s barely holding on by a thread and the only comfort he gets is “it’ll take time, but you’ll forget, everyone forgets.” that’s the opposite of what he wants to hear. in fact, he never wants to hear those words in that arrangement ever again, not when it deals with her. the girl of his dreams. gone, like she was never there, and like no one even knows who she is. that’s who Commander Wolffe, of the 104th, is so tragically missing.

Wolffe tries to talk to his vod. the only words offered are a “c’mon Commander. move on. we all have to get on with our life.” and Wolffe knows this is true. in war, you lose things you never thought you would, but you also gain things too. Wolffe knew from the moment he met her that his life would change. he wasn’t just another clone in this fight anymore, he had a purpose, a home. he would’ve done anything to keep her safe. anything at all.

the thing with his vod telling him to move on is that he doesn’t think they understand what it means to him. they don’t realize the pain and trauma he gained with her loss. he can’t look at things and see them the same. he can’t hear certain words without thinking about her. he can’t do anything without her being with him. it was a blessing but now it’s a curse.

Commander Wolffe, as of right now, is on leave. his Jedi General saw it fit for him to take a break. General Plo is good at keeping his men healthy, but even now he can tell there’s something deeper going on. Wolffe, while stoic and not one to get emotional, had been near his breaking point for weeks now. General Plo could tell.

that leads back to Wolffe. he’s laying in bed, staring at the ceiling, feeling empty. his quarters once held light and hope and now it feels cluttered and small. Wolffe decides he needs to do something to clear his head and that’s what has him reaching for his comlink. he starts dialing her number before realizing he can’t. he hangs up immediately, afraid someone else will pick up, and that he wouldn’t have an explanation. Wolffe has to clear his mind somehow.

he ends up at 79’s eventually. he can’t remember how he got here but all he knows is he needs a drink. Wolffe heads to the bar immediately and sits down. he orders a glass of whiskey and bows his head. he’s never been much of a drinker but he needs to get her image out of his mind. he needs to get her smile out of his mind. the whiskey is set down in front of him and he downs it right away. the bartender watches with curiosity but goes about her business. Wolffe just wanted time to dwell on his mistakes and to feel his grief.

a pretty Twi’lek woman walks towards him and leans against the counter. Wolffe doesn’t pay her any mind until she sets her hand on his.

“what’s a handsome man like you doing alone? whoever has you sure is lucky.” her voice is sweet but nothing like hers.

“i’m not looking for anything tonight, i just want to be left alone.” Wolffe registers the look on her face as concern before adding, “please.”

thankfully, she understands. she sets a friendly hand on his shoulder and leaves with a ‘good luck, soldier.’

Wolffe gives her a nod in response before flagging the bartender over. he’s going to need a lot more to drink to deal with this.

————

Wolffe is drunk off his ass. the bartender had to get a taxi for him to even make it near the barracks. Wolffe is stumbling his way through the hallways when he sees the familiar hair. it’s only a flash before it’s gone, but it was there. he knows it.

Wolffe is intent on following the shadow until he spots his vod. Boost and Sinker are heading his way. he doesn’t want them to see their Commander like this. by the time he’s figured out he needs to move, they’ve caught up to him and are now helping him to his quarters.

“Maker, Commander, what’s gotten into you? you have never acted like this before. is it because of... her?” Sinker questions on the walk.

Wolffe can only let out a grunt and the rest of the walk is quiet. once inside his room, Wolffe collapses. he’s sitting on his knees with his face upturned. he takes two deep breaths before getting up to reach under his bed. he grabs his lockbox that holds millions of memories and starts pulling out things she wrote him, photos she took, anything that had her presence. Wolffe was a grieving man and the best way to grieve? destruction.

he leaves his quarters for the second time that night on a mission. he heads for an empty room and finds an ashtray. once finding the ashtray, he looks for matches and sets the photos and letters on the tray. he finds the matches, lights one up, and looks at the top photo. the two are smiling brightly, their faces smushed together, and you can see the happiness in Wolffe’s face. he’s never been happier than in that moment. Wolffe grabs that photo off the top before setting the match on the rest. there’s no way he could get rid of her entirely.

——

by the time Wolffe gets back to his quarters, he’s exhausted. he lays on his bed and hopes to get a quick nap in. he hasn’t been sleeping properly since she’s been gone. it’s like she was his one and only comfort. Wolffe stares at the ceiling and recounts their time together. eventually, he does fall asleep.

it doesn’t last long though. within a few hours, he’s waking up in a cold sweat. there wasn’t anything he could do but the guilt is still there. he reached for his comlink again and stops himself from dialing the wrong line. instead, he calls someone he can trust.

Cody.

Cody answers after a few rings and he grumbles out a greeting.

“Cody, i don’t know what’s happening to me. i’m scared and i’m tired and i just can’t stop thinking about her. it’s been weeks and i still see her. Cody, she’s haunting me. she’s more than a memory, i’m telling you.”

Wolffe pours his heart out to his vod and Cody takes a minute to respond. finally, he sighs and begins to talk.

“Wolffe, do you know what time it is? it’s the middle of the night. i’m not angry at you, i’m sorry you’re going through this, but i’ve got a campaign in a few days. i need to sleep.” Cody let’s out another sigh before he ends the conversation with, “it’s going to be alright, Wolffe. i know it is.”

the comlink beeps signifying the end of the call. this is going to be a long leave.

———

when Wolffe gets a call from General Plo to check in, he goes immediately. he’s barreling his way down the halls to meet with his General, and when he finally reaches the room, he clears his throat.

Plo turns around, expecting to see a clean-shaven, sober Wolffe. what he sees in front of him is a broken man. Wolffe is swaying slightly, he has dark circles around his eyes, and he looks like he hasn’t shaved in years.

Plo is taken aback by Wolffe’s appearance and takes in a breath. Wolffe shakily raises his arm in a salute. Plo walks towards Wolffe and sets his arm down. he sets his hands on his shoulders and looks at his son. Plo had heard Wolffe’s situation had gotten worse. he knew about his excessive drinking, his bar fights, his erratic sleep schedule. Wolffe wasn’t taking care of himself and it was affecting everyone.

“Wolffe, you need to sleep. please, son, stop the drinking. you need to take care of yourself and your brothers.”

he’s been hearing the same message just worded differently from everyone. he’s at his breaking point now. Wolffe starts shaking with anger and Plo just watches. Wolffe’s fists clench at his sides before they loosen. he falls to his knees and looks at his General.

“please, General. please. i can’t do this anymore. Maker, please! i need her! Maker, this is a worthless life without her.”

Wolffe bows his head and, though never religious, starts to pray to anything out there that she’ll return to him. he needs to see her again. Wolffe is a strong man but even strong men need someone. she was his someone.

Plo drops to his knees besides Wolffe and brings him into a hug. he sets a hand on his back and one cradling the side of his face. Wolffe starts sobbing and screams until his voice is hoarse. he screams for anything and everything in hopes that she’s listening.

Plo just sits there, cradling his son, and sending reassurance through the Force. this is a time for Wolffe to get everything out.

a while later, Wolffe is finally calmed down enough to where Plo can talk to him.

“i’m sorry you dealt with this alone for so long. i’m sorry you lost her. i’m just sorry, Wolffe. you’re a good man, you deserved to be happy with her.”

Wolffe takes in a shaky breath and leans back. his back ends up against the nearest wall and his legs are outstretched.

“i‘ve tried everything, General. i’ve tried every coping mechanism available. nothing helps. i’ve left her old comlink messages saying i love her, i’ve walked by her old room, i’ve called my vod in the middle of the night and none of them can relate or help me.”

there’s a pregnant silence between the two. Plo is about to speak again before Wolffe finally explains.

“i’ve let myself go because i don’t see a reason to be put together. there isn’t a reason to look decent without her. i’ve tried to drown out her laugh with alcohol and it doesn’t work. the more i drink, the louder her laugh rings through my head.”

Wolffe takes in three deep breaths before telling Plo the main problem.

“the reason i’m not sleeping is because i know she’s waiting for me. i find things to do because i know she’s waiting in my dreams. and i don’t think i could handle seeing her without being able to touch her.”

Plo gives Wolffe’s shoulder a firm pat before bringing him into another hug.

with his head resting on Plo’s shoulder, Wolffe breaths out a soft murmur.

“people say she’s only in my head. it’s killing me.”

and the two sit there sharing the grief together.

#Commander Wolffe #commander wolffe x reader #commander wolffe imagine #Clone Wars #clone wars imagine #The Clone Wars

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omgrachwrites · 4 years ago

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Tell a Tale of You and Me - Chapter Sixteen

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Summary: You knew that making a bet with Sirius Black was like making a deal with the devil but you just couldn’t help yourself. You had never been a heavenly woman.

Warnings: a little bit of fluff, more angst!

Words: 2257

Disclaimer: This gif doesn’t belong to me!

A/N: There is so much angst in this part but I hope you guys enjoy it! Please let me know what you think and let me know if you would like to be tagged! I love you all! xxx

Chapter Sixteen

It had been a fool proof prank, a safe but fun one and the marauders certainly didn’t imagine that they would get caught. The marauders were given some sort of respect from the other Hogwarts houses – even the Slytherins – everybody knew to just let the marauders get on with their pranks. Everybody knew that it was fruitless to try and stop them.

It had only meant to be a harmless prank, they had been dropping Dungbombs in the Slytherin corridor, and they made sure not to drop them too close to the Slytherin common room, because they didn’t want to start a full house war. They also made sure to keep themselves hidden, or so they thought. James’ invisibility cloak must have slipped off them without them noticing because when the four boys were on their way back to the common room, they were cornered by McGonagall and were frog marched right into detention.

Sirius bitterly thought that it must have been a swotty first year that had seen them and told on them. The thought made him grind his teeth together angrily, he could have been spending time with Y/N, and now he was wasting time by being in detention. James and Peter would be having detention with McGonagall while Sirius and Remus were going to be having detention with Slughorn. Sirius did feel bad for Remus though, he knew that Remus hadn’t wanted to go through with their prank.

Slughorn had them sorting out rotten Flubberworms which made Sirius gag and he forced back the urge to vomit all over the table. He glanced over at Remus who had an intense look of annoyance on his face. Sirius bit into his bottom lip and he knew that he had to say something.

“I’m sorry Remus, I know that you didn’t want to go through with the prank, its cutting into time that you could have been spending time with Morgana,” he sighed, “how are things going between the two of you?”

Remus licked his bottom lip nervously as he wiped his hands on his pants, “well um, she thinks that she’s no good for me which is complete bollocks by the way because she’s amazing. I don’t know why she thinks that she’s no good for me. She,” he hesitated as he bounced his leg nervously, “she tells me that she wants to be with me but she can’t because there are things that I don’t know about her. But, I won’t stop fighting for her, not when I’ve got secrets of my own and her secret can’t be worse than mine,” he nodded, suddenly looking determined.

Sirius smiled serenely, his best friend was the best person he knew and he was certain that Remus deserved the world. He hoped that everything would work itself out soon, “I’m sorry that things aren’t great right now, truly I am. But, you should never stop fighting for the people you care about,” Sirius only wished that he could take his own advice.

Remus grinned thankfully at Sirius and they both got back to work, the heavy awkward silence that had once filled the dungeons quickly evaporated. Sirius held his breath to try and ward off the rotten stench of the Flobberworms and after what felt like a hundred years, Slughorn finally let the two boys go.

As Remus and Sirius walked back to the common room, they chatted and chuckled about what the Quidditch team would be like the following year. They both knew that there was no way it would be as good as it was this year. Remus trailed off as they both noticed that Regulus was walking towards them, the short curls on his head bounced as he strode over to them with purpose.

“I need to talk with you brother,” his eyes flashed with anger and for one startling moment, Regulus looked so much like their mother.

Remus warily looked at Sirius with his hazel eyes wide, “I’ll meet you back at the common room.”

Sirius nodded and as Remus walked away, he turned to look at his little brother, “what do you want to talk about Reg?” Sirius asked as he casually slouched against the stone wall, narrowing his eyes.

“I presume that Y/N has told you the news has she?”

Sirius’ eyes quickly flashed with hurt before he adopted a teasing smirk, “yes, I know all about Y/N having to marry you. Poor Y/N,” joking about it made Sirius feel a lot better.

Regulus sighed in frustration as he raked a hand through his curls, “you need to stop it Sirius, as my brother, you just need to stop. I know that you have feelings for Y/N,” when Sirius scoffed, Regulus continued, “I see the way you look at her when you think that no one else can see you. You look at her like she’s all you’ve ever wanted.”

For once, Sirius just listened to his brother, Regulus was in fact telling the truth about how Sirius felt but Regulus could never know that, “I don’t have feelings for Y/N,” Sirius lied, “but even if I did, what does it matter to you? You’re in an arranged marriage with her Reg; it’s hardly the most romantic thing in the world.”

“It’s not just an arranged marriage to me, I have feelings for her. Real feelings.”

“Reg,” Sirius breathed, his brother’s words knocked the wind out of him and he fought hard to keep his composure. Suddenly, Regulus’ eyes filled up with tears and Sirus was immediately reminded of a little boy who would crawl into his older brother’s bed when he had had a nightmare. Sirius wanted to hug his brother tightly but he knew that it would give him away. All Sirius could do was regard him warily.

“Look, Sirius, you can get any damned girl that you want. Why does it have to be the girl I love?” Please, just let me love her and let her love me.”

This time Sirius couldn’t stop the tears so he had to look away from his brother, “you love Y/N, do you?” he fought to keep the tears out of his voice.

“Yes I do. Please let her be, I’m begging you.”

Sirius shook his head, “you don’t have to worry about me Reg.”

“I hope not,” he sighed, “I just wanted you to know how I felt,” Sirius felt a gentle hand on his shoulder and he heard footsteps retreating.

When he heard his brother’s footsteps fade he finally let the hot tears escape his eyes and slip down his cheeks. He quickly slapped a hand over his mouth the muffle his sobs as he sank to the floor, shaking as sobs wracked his body, he never wanted it to hurt this much. He was at a crossroads; he was always supposed to look out for his baby brother. Though, how could he when Regulus got to live out the rest of his days with Y/N? Sirius spent a lot of time weighing up the pros and cons of his decision and by the time he returned to the common room he knew what he was going to do.

As the portrait hole swung open, Y/N looked up from where she was doing homework with Lily. She smiled beautifully, though it faltered slightly when she looked at him and Sirius could only imagine how he must have looked. It must have been obvious that he’d been crying.

Y/N pulled him into a hug, kissing his cheek as she did so before whispering into his ear, “is everything alright beautiful?”

Sirius wanted to tell her everything but he knew that it wasn’t fair on her so he settled for a lie, he pulled away from her and smiled, “I’m fine.”

Y/N nodded though she didn’t look convinced as she pulled him over to sit with their friends. As Sirius sat down next to Remus, Remus smiled at him sympathetically and offered him a piece of chocolate. Sirius chuckled lightly – chocolate was Remus’ solution to everything – and he smiled gratefully as he popped the chocolate into his mouth.

“So,” James started as he threw an arm around Lily’s shoulders, “what are the plans for the next Hogsmeade trip?”

Lily laughed, “well, I don’t know what you guys are doing but we’re having a girly day,” she threw Y/N a meaningful look, “Morgana is welcome too Remus, we want to get to know her better.”

“Thanks Lily, I’ll mention it to her. I’m sure that she’ll appreciate it,” Remus smiled and Sirius glanced over at Y/N.

She was smiling at Lily but the smile didn’t reach her eyes and they weren’t sparkling like they usually did. It was obvious that she was feeling less than enthusiastic about the girly day. He wanted to hold her hand and tell her that everything was going to be okay.

-----------------------------------

The ivory silk flowed down your body like rippling water, it was so soft and it made you feel like a princess, it made you feel so beautiful. You turned to the side and looked back at your reflection in the mirror, the train was about an inch long and the wedding veil fell to your feet. The only things that you weren’t crazy about were the colour and it had some bone button fastenings in the back, you’d prefer a corseted bodice.

“Are you ready Y/N?” you heard Alice call from the other side of the curtain.

You nodded and then realised that your friends couldn’t see you, “I’m coming out now,” you took a deep shaky breath as you stood down from the step and quickly opened up the curtain. As you stood in front of your friends, Lily gasped as she teared up and sobbed into the tissues she’d brought with her, she had told you that she was going to cry. Alice rubbed Lily’s back as she beamed brightly at you.

It was only Morgana who said anything, she’d been a great help through all this wedding dress shopping, “you look beautiful Y/N, that dress looks like it was made for you,” she smiled.

“Thank you Morgana, I shouldn’t say this too soon but I think that this is the one. It only needs a few minor adjustments,” you giggled as you performed a little twirl for your friends. Lily sniffled as she gave you a tight hug, you laughed as you hugged her back.

When she pulled away, you glanced out of the window and you saw Sirius walking with the rest of the marauders. He too glanced up from outside and he froze in place, his mouth dropping open slightly as he looked you up and down. You smiled and gave him a shy little wave, but instead of waving back he guiltily shifted his gaze back to his friends and they carried on walking up the high street.

Lily who had been watching this whole exchange merely sighed, “come on, why don’t you get changed? Then we can go to The Three Broomsticks.”

The weather was finally getting a little bit warmer so you could sit outside, the warm Butterbeer warming your insides as the buds on the cherry blossom tree overhead grew. Sirius had been acting funny – you were pretty used to it by now – he wouldn’t look at you for more than a couple of seconds. He also kept on shifting his gaze like he was guilty and hiding something. What was so bad that he couldn’t tell you? He knew that you were always going to be there for him, no matter what it cost you. It had been his round and he hadn’t come out of the pub for a little while and you were kind of worried so you wanted to check on him.

“I’m going to see if Sirius needs help with the drinks,” you smiled casually as you began to rise from your seat and your friends smiled at you. James’ smile looked the most forced by far. You walked inside the warm pub, it wasn’t bustling as it usually was and you could see Sirius standing at the bar with the full round of drinks, “come on now, you don’t want the Butterbeer to get cold do you?” you joked.

Sirius glanced up at you, his lips twitching into a small smile, “I’m sorry,” he looked back down at the tray of drinks.

“Hey, I was joking. Butterbeer is nice hot or cold!” you smiled as you placed a hand on his shoulder.

Sirius sighed as he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, “I’m not talking about the drinks. You looked so beautiful in that wedding dress and I’m sorry,” he mumbled as he picked up the tray and began to walk away.

“What are you sorry for Sirius? What do you possibly have to be sorry about?” you followed him, nervously squeezing between two vampires.

Sirius whirled around to stare at you and you marvelled at how he managed not to slosh the drinks, it looked like he was going to give you a proper answer. Though, he only shrugged and gave you one of his usual dazzling smiles, “never mind sweetheart. It’s not important.”

Though you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong, it was like when he had come back to the common room about three weeks ago and he had red around his eyes, it looked like he’d been crying. What was he enduring and why couldn’t he tell you about it?

-----------------------------------

@approved-by-dentists @thefuturelawyer @a-miserable-hufflepunk @firelordmillie @seriouslysiriuss @sleep-i-ness @play-morezeppelin @pregnant-piggy @sleepingalaska @smiithys @blisfvll @rexorangecouny @findzelda @wangmangagavroche @the-moon-and-the-book @hxrgreeves @ghostofstudentspast @they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon @my-unique-mind @im-an-angel-of-the-lord-you-ass @acciovisio @obsessedwithrandomthings @kashishwrites @fific7 @blackbirddaredevil23 @siriusblackspam @mads-bri @lilulo-12fanfiction @mrspadfoot4 @tinymalscoffee

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iconsumeheadcanons · 5 years ago

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persona characters autism headcanons!

hi im autistic and i started my day with sun so now im !!!!!!!!! some of these headcanons are from elsewhere on tumbr, but i dont know where :((( so i am hoping someone out there knows that n that everybody knows that i love them <3

(also go check out mollypaup and i think hypeswap if you havent already! they post some good stuff autism+adhd hc too!!! i think.. oh! and thieves-in-the-palace!!!)

Joker

there was some artwork from someone on tublr..where they pointed out that he doesnt really talk outside the metaverse so--hes hyperverbal as joker and just near nonverbal as akiren

he stims ALL THE TIME. that phone thing, the pencil thing, the little tappy tap of his foot, pulling at his bangs when hes embarrassed/smug. someone get him a fidget spinner. he’ll prob learn to do tricks with it

he probably sucks at focusing in class, like i know its just the game design but hes always surprised out of his daily “star out the window at the nearby office building” when his teachers ask him questions

mona mentions when the pt is at Wilton for the first time (after they run into shido) that joker eats like shit, and that could have multiple causes at the start of the story of course, but when i first played i thought that joker was a picky eater and that the variety (and amount of food) at the buffet would be an Ordeal...

tho mona makes that comment bc joker looked pale after having a little ptsd moment from shidos voice, but i didnt know that the first time i played

maybe when joker makes a face at ryuji putting so much ginger in his gyudon? joker probably does not like pickled ginger lol

his favortive foods are all spicy, which is why the curry he makes for his friends is always ‘overly spicy’, and why kasumi makes him a curry bento and joker kept going “...?” .... “....?!”

overly reflective glasses have been a great plus for him bc now he never has to make real eye contact every again!

mona Soft. play with Ann hair. maybe Braid. nice

puns (Gorou the Goroumet)

he has so many options to be straight up rude sometimes in game. he probably no clue on his own, which is why he defaults to Not Talking. people probably mention his constant scary face, which is just him being nonexpressive, squinting at all the fucking bright lights, and Tired

executive function who? we do everything last minute folks

high pain tolerance, which is why he was the kid that was always climbing trees in elementary school to get basketballs unstuck from the branches

his sixth sense lets him see treasure and possible places to climb/crawl bc 1. Shiny? Steal it. Steal it Now. and 2. Could i fit in that? Time to Find Out

probalby a bit of a klepto too oops. he’ll return it tho!! but he has to do it dramatically or he’ll die

cant sit properly to save his life

smells and touch are Great, they can keep him grounded when his brain goes off to police or dead rivals or guilt or

if a friend hung out with him and gave him total reigns of the agenda, he would choose to nap on the floor while his friend does something off to the side quietly

hyperfocuses on handy tasks (i.e. lockpicks, coffee brewing, cleaning, his part time jobs) and some things like movies and books. everything else is a tossup

his (normal) navigation app is his most used app bc he still doesnt know where hes going, even though he only goes to the same few places in the city

hates being sweaty, literally cannot stand it. probably double exhausted during the summer

but Needs Compression so hes often Struggling

Futaba

paraphrase from p5d “i have no motor skills so i cant play rhythm games :(” need i say more? (i will regardless)

echolalia all the time, from anime, memes, the PT

those headphones she wears all the time? noise cancelling ear protectors babey

only talks about her interests, “normal” talking is Not Easy, but she is still communicative w others despite her worries. shes not “hard to understand” at all but she feels the anxiety nonetheless

only talks informally, cannot talk ‘politely’ with out imitating someone around her

shes had meltdowns and anxiety attacks in game :( i relate so hard

Technology. thats it

def had an egypt phase that pops up every few months. probably came from yu-gi-oh

has Immune to Bright Lights buff. joker is very jealous

��Time to make like a tree and leave!” and 30 other iterations

video game metaphors are the only ones that makes sense to her

probably relates hard to robot characters in anime for their general androgyny and confusion about human emotions and connections

probably gets told that shes “too smart to be on the spectrum” by teachers >:( she fails their classes on purpose

wakaba’s autistic too that just how it is

the Connection that she establishes with Joker is so Warm. my life goals include adopting an older brother like futaba has lsdkfjslkfj

also eater of 5 foods only, i mean, she brings cup ramen to the beach. i just really admire her...

hides in small spaces for comfort

doesnt she have like uhhhhh hyperthymesia or something like that?

Yusuke

art

his entire social link is learning how humans work, which i relate

talks seriously all the time

“sarcasm? who is that? are you saying I was sarcastic?...how?”

cant remember to take care of his body, and madarame did not help with that either

lot of uncomfortable staring, hes overdoing the eye contact thingy

infodumps all the time, doesnt know hes doing it

needs a lot of support even if he doesnt think he deserves it. no one ever complains about helping him out tho

visual stims my friends

he didnt know that you could look up pictures on the internet but he does know you can stream live videos of waterfalls and fluffy animales!!

I am certainly in the mood

for something salty today.

he and joker are scared of math. numbers do not interact

Yusuke, futaba, and akiren are a trio and i know this bc their first day of non-thievery interacts is Akiren clearing Futabas room w/o permission, futaba hyperfocusing on destroying medjed, and yusuke rearranging futabas figurines so they are more visually appealing

morgana is a support friend for all of them bc igor knows they need it

Souji/Yu

yes, he mostly wears gray semi formal clothes bc parents tell him to, no, he will not changes this

Schedule or Death

“sorry, could you repeat that?” “huh? oh yeah, i was saying that--” “yeah that’d be cool.”

cats, fishing, he just likes to be quiet. you can literally spend a day at the beach just to think if you want, and that is what yu want

has a lot of scripts for things (of which he shares with nanako!) but if he runs out he just stops talking..

inaba is a godsend bc its so fucking quiet and warm

he Yearns to hold his friends hands, but he shies away from a lot of touch (excepting yosuke, teddie, and nanako)

Cooking and Cleaning makes the world better. he and joker vibe together with this

unlike akiren, he strong arms any executive dysfunction into Be Productive or Else. his punishment is feeling the pure anxiety of having to make up for ‘lost time’. (another symptom of his workaholic parents)

writes everything down, notes are very neat, has pages dedicated for bad doodles when hes not feeling his usual Super Classroom Focus

Cannot handle secondhand embarrassment (most often caused by yosuke) and will quietly slip away to random cats or origami folding

hungry, crunch crunch folks. probably needs chewelry bc he used to chew on his shirt collars when he was younger.

cleans up after everyone in the food court, constantly worries about them accidently hurting themselves. likely spends half of group conversations watching peoples hands

he canonically eats expired food, nanako plz help your brother

really clumsy, but people only notice after they decide that he is a cool person

video games are too chaotic for him

exhausted every night from the pure amount of masking he does, if a friend spends the night (or is like yosuke) they will know his more comfortable weirdo self (tho everyone knows hes a weirdo eventually)

hyperempathetic, sometimes just understands animals and children better than peeople his age or older

Yukiko

her jokes

she and souji get in ‘trouble’ together, she and joker commit crimes together

she and chie have to coordinate outfits, its important

actually understands metaphors, but does not understand people

like me, had no clue that creepy kid was flirting with her

she is very angry when she has meltdowns that might involve slamming doors and shouting. her parents call these ‘tantrums’ and ‘unfitting for a polite daughter’ but really thats because her meltdowns tend to be caused by arguments w her family after a long day of school and TV world traipsing

the metronome meme, except hers goes between Loudest Person in the Room to Quietest Pin Drop in the Planet. she is completely unaware of this

her atmosphere brightens when chie appears. that is not only the lesbian energy within her, but also because chie is like her Favorite Person

Cannot wear Pants. No (tho she wants to try it! but she puts them on and her soul instantly squashes)

happy flappy lesbian! watch out!

Naoto

the pouty face. all the time lskdfjlasdkf

hes really snappy sometimes and i love that for him. he and akechi should fight just to see what would happen (please read Bang Bang Shoot Shoot on AO3)

“do not touch me or my hat, thank you”

no one has ever seen him shutdown and no one ever will (except for his grandpa)(and kanji)(and rise)

probably likes certain food textures and will stand for nothing less, probably feels embarrassed about his preferences with friends

constantly jumps between ‘everybody hates me so i should act like them so they dont hate me’ to ‘i refuse to be anything but very comfortable as myself, and i dont care that im making you upset sir’

he and souji are the king and queen of subtle stims, but for unhappy reasons :(

does not make jokes. cannot joke around. understand? yes, do? no.

loose clothes are the only good clothes, but all tags and obtrusive seams will be obliterated by kanji tatsumi

not very empathetic so he probably comes off as an asshole to strangers (like when he throws away his classmates confession letters without reading them) but he tries so hard to sound comforting when his buds are struggling.

his understanding of others emotions/reactions come from his learning as a detective, which seems cold+clinical to others, especially compared to souji, whos completely unexpressive but very introverted people person

Hamuko/Minako/Kotone

big personality!! very people-oriented!! koromaru and her are buddies!! when shes having a real bad time, shes very quiet and expressions turn off

interrupts herself in the middle of conversations all the time. no one knows where shes coming from. her brains is thousands of km ahead of her body

bouncey legs, swingin arms, twirlly skirt, little somersaults! when will she stop? never!

very obvious music stims with her hands and arms! people are like “oh there she goes! happy as usual!” shes listening to minatos heavy metal playlist

switches from exhausted to excited within milliseconds. no one can predict, not even her

SEES has to ask her for context all the time cuz she’ll just continue shit from 2 weeks ago without warning

professionals will assume shes very childish bc of how chipper she is, but she is beyond mature for her age and only feels comfortable enough to have serious conversations if a person has proved themself able to handle it

collects every little thing. her room is a mess and she has to get rid of most of it every time she moves :(

hates cleaning! smells bad, feels bad hhhhhgggg

dont let mitsuru-senpai see her bedroom

gets lost in the middle of conversations with others bc shes thinking about a story connected to one(1) word that was said earlier

no sense of time and place, she just sees her friends and goes “ah, this is the right place, then” but junpei and akihiko are also lost so now theyre all screwed

Minato/Makoto/Sakuya

no talkies, no walkies

his story in the movies is him literally learning how to function around people he cares for

doesnt get jokes, expressions, body language, empathy, subtlety, metaphors, physical contact, or eye contact. aigis is probably the only person he truly understands right away

he is still nice to people because he doesnt see a reason not to be, but also he has very limited energy so only his senpai and old people get his most polite-kindnesses

cannot describe feelings for the life of him. the team wont know hes injured or sick until hes passed out

everything is too loud, time to drown it out with my loud ass music

rocking and chewing stims, ryoji is the first person to point him out for these subtle stims (not accusingly of course, just general pure curiosity and love for the uniqueness of humanity)

likes to cover his face with whatever is available, lives like a bat in a dark dry cave

will wear anything that has pockets and his blue/gray/black palette

sleepy at all times bc he never has much energy

when he was younger he probably needed a lot of support, especially after his parents died, because he wouldnt communicate like a neurotypical and would shutdown for hours in the middle of school without warning. probably missed a lot of lessons and field trips out of pure overstimulation

eating at all times. no preference, just whatevers closest

his meltdowns probalby include humming whining noises and curling up in a ball, which makes people want to touch him, but that is the LAST thing he wants. put a blanket on him! play some music! do not talk and do not expect him to speak

aigis is the only person who can touch him normally bc her hands are cold and he likes cold

never nude, feels mmmmmmmmm without clothes and probalby wears a full robe in the hotsprings

will not do things that take more than one step w/o someone else walking him thru it, which Same

#my writing #p3 #p4 #p5 #persona 3 #persona 4 #persona 5 #ren #futaba #souji #hamuko #minato #vibes straight thru the sun #i sincerely hope the read more works #im so srry for grammar problems #i literally cant read rn

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bellamyblakru · 4 years ago

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HEYYYYYYY i’m so excited to respond to ur ask it made me so happy to see u in my notifs and i’m so excited for u for ur milestone! anyways i kinda want all of them but i decided to cut down to 🥺 :)))) 👀 pls rant i will read it all and ☕️ for morgwen andddd manon from the tog books. <3 <3 :*

HEY AMY!!! i hope you had a lovely day today🥺thank you for the ask💞

🥺- for my mutuals, ill talk about why i follow you and why everyone should be as well

omg im pretty sure i met and started following you like the day of that bellamy scene™️ because i remember thinking how fucking horrendous that episode ended, and, at the same time, how amazing that night on tumblr was aksnakaaj. so that night, tumblr was a fucking disaster and chaotic and funny asf. i remember texting @tkstrrand the entire ep (bc she couldn’t watch it for some reason) like how boring it was/how she wasn’t missing much blahblah and then when the death scene happened at the last fucking second, i sent her about a thousand separate incoherent texts in the span of like two minutes LOL tumblr was in shambles and i made a few posts about how fucking dumb the show was—one post i made i told my few new followers to fuck the 100 and just watch merlin and you texted me about it!! we have literally so much in common (with merlin, atla, the 100, tog!!!) that when you texted me about how you felt about that scene compared to merlin’s ending, my thought was like “this blog is so kind and we feel the same way and i need to follow asap.”

you are literally so sweet and lovely to talk to🥺that night™️ may had been disastrous, but i can look on it with a lighter heart because we met because of it!! every time we talk i always smile so much (and dw, i know i still have to get clone wars for our boy anakin👀👀)

dude, everyone should be following you because your blog is incredible, your tags are superb, and you are literally one of the sweetest people i’ve met on here😭💞 i adore you.

👀 - and ill tell you a parallel from merlin or the 100 that still fucks me up

this post for merthur still FUCKS ME UP by @camelotsheart

THE EYES. THE GIFSET’S BEAUTIFUL COLORING. THE EYES. EYES. I CANT. THIS GIFSET HAUNTS ME. parallels, man, i fucking love them.

☕️ + send me a ship/character/movie/book and ill give you my opinions on it

my opinions on morgwen:

I LOVE IT SO MUCH. I SHIP IT WITH MY WHOLE ASS SOUL. dude, their potential as a ship is incredible😭i fucking love them together. i wrote them as a side pairing in my first multi-chapter merthur fic and i adored writing their interactions and dynamic sm. if morgana was going to be with anyone, my first choice will always be gwen. i also read them as a pairing in fics all the time because the pure power-couple potential is insane.

hot ☕️ here™️: i think if someone was to bring morgana back from the brink of hatred, it should have been gwen (not merlin). so, like, i could definitely see merlin telling her about his magic and whatnot and maybe that would have stopped her from going dark side...but...i didn’t think merlin should have (ekk probably an unpopular opinion).

see, i love merlin with my entire heart..and tbh telling uther fucking pendragon’s ward that he had magic was just too much of a gamble—especially with arthur’s life on the line, which literally became merlin’s sole purpose in life (another matter for a different essay™️). i understand his need to keep it a secret from her even more when the large reptile repeatedly got into merlin’s head that she was bad news from the jump (also another matter for a different essay™️).

SO. that leaves two options for our miserable magical gal: arthur or gwen. now, i honestly believe arthur wouldn’t have hurt her if he was told. and i even think he may have became more sympathetic to the magical community because of it—especially when he saved mordred wayyyy early on that cemented the fact that arthur was not uther. but i can also understand why morgana wouldn’t tell arthur, and it’s pretty much the same reason merlin didn’t tell her about his magic: the risk was too big and she didn’t want to gamble her life with an unknown reaction.

now we get to the main point: gwen would have been the best option for her. whether it is platonic or not, gwen was always there for morgana. gwen is such a kind, loving soul, and she deeply respected and adored morgana—you can tell by the way she smiled around her in the beginning seasons, how she would get her flowers, how she would worry about morgana’s wellbeing. even though gwen was morgana’s servant, she cared for her in more ways than were required and it showed. they were best friends. the entire incident with gwen’s father, which was horrendous, might be the reason gwen would be rightfully upset about the subject of magic; however. she knew her father wasn’t magical, she knew uther was a tyrant, and she knew morgana’s heart. someone is gonna tell me that if morgana had explained to gwen what happened, how her magic was innate, how morgana would never fucking choose to have magic anywhere near her shithead guardian (who probably would have killed her imo if he knew bc you know the whole “fire will purify” bullshit), that gwen would hate her??? I MEAN LITERALLY WATCH THE LAST EPISODES AGAIN. when QUEEN GWEN realizes that the whole time it was merlin saving everyone’s asses, and she connected all the dots, her face showed nothing but pure understanding and acceptance.

gwen was such an underused character. her fucking potential arcs could have been phenomenal (again, LOL, another matter for a different essay™️), and the way canon made morgana use gwen was fucking gross and im not a fan🙃 but fuck canon. i ship them and i love them to pieces ✌🏻thank you for coming to my talk✌🏻

my opinions on manon mf blackbeak:

oh boy, where do i start? i would die for her...is that too extreme for the starting place? i fucking LOVE manon blackbeak dude. oh my god, so, remember when her and aelin fought for the first time in QoS? i remember jumping up from my lounging position with my hand over my smiling mouth because i love both of these badass hardcore women with everything i am. i mean, aelin owns my ass (she is probably my favorite character of all time rn) but manon hits differently. her storyline at the beginning was so bleh, but, man, did it escalate fast to “holy shit” to “i fucking love her” to “oh fuck im sobbing.”

the only thing i will complain about with her character in canon was the fact that my girl was straight???? excuse me?? she has been alive for fucking forever and she is straight? no. i cant accept that. tbh i ship manon and elide🥺 (i also ship dorain and chaol oops). but her character development was everything and i cant think too long on what happens because i will start crying tbh sksjsmakks

okay wow im so sorry for, uh, spilling every thought i had into this. it legit took me like a day to respond 😔

i appreciate you so much. thank you🥺💞

#ashley answers #ashleycelebrates #mutuals💞#IM SORRY FOR ANOTHER RANT HOLY SHIT #this post will be fucking long im so sorry lmfaooo #long post #the 100 #merlin parallels #morgwen #manon blackbeak #merlin meta #kinda again?#i go into morgwen tbh and how much more incredible the show could’ve been tbh #morgana pendragon #bbc gwen #also lol if anyone feels differently sorry😔this is just how ya girl thinks #ashley rants #okay im exhausted gn everyone see ya tomorrow

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amasdoodles · 3 months ago

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sketchy doodle of carmilla and morgana (our game's female victor)

#ama doodles #curse of strahd #cos: tcc #carmilla (oc)#victor vallakovich #for tagging purposes only sorry morgana #i have to make myself comfortable with drawing ship art for every ship i have lol #slowly but surely

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vanyahargreaves · 5 years ago

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Sorry to bother but just wondering if you know of any good alluther fanfic? Most everyone is so hostile towards them I can't find anything

Thank you for sending an ask and you’re not a bother at all! Tbh, I haven’t read much alluther fics (shame on me I know). I’ve read some fics where it is a side ship, but clearly there should be more alluther-centric fics !

For the purpose of this ask, I checked the ao3 tags for alluther fics and here are some good ones that I’ve found! This list is sorted alphabetically and ratings are included:

Begin Again by Electra_XT (Teen And Up Audiences) (1/1) Summary: “It’s been a while,” Luther said, standing in the doorway. Allison swallowed. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20121961

between the sheets by littlesliveroftime (Explicit) (8/?) Summary: Growing up was hard for the hargreeves' children, especially in puberty’s clutches isolated from the outside world. Because of this, they learned to sneak around in the middle of the night after reginald shuts the monitors off for the night. Most of the time, they found themselves in each other's rooms.  Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19055323/chapters/45428638 Note: This fic includes various harcest pairings, but chapter 3 is dedicated to alluther!

fata morgana by thefudge (Mature) (1/1) Summary: He grips her to him, unwilling to let her go even after they have both screamed out the beast. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18268331

Miss Mindfuck by sarkywoman (Teen And Up Audiences) (1/1) Summary: Vanya’s attack had felt like reinforcement of the idea that her Rumour is just plain bad news. 5 times Allison Rumoured someone and one time she didn't. Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20533685

There’s prolly a lot more that I’ve missed and that’s because I used the search operator otp: true (which means works tagged with only one relationship). So there could still be a lot of Alluther fics with other pairings, that I might have missed. Feel free to recommend alluther fics to me because I need to read more!

#answered #maywemeetagaincommandr #alluther #fanfic #text post

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darrelodin · 4 years ago

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Name: DarrelOdin/Darrel378/goodygoody19

Fandoms: I lurk in a lot of 'em, but I've only written a fic for Undertale, and a couple of Persona 5 fics. I have plenty of *ideas* for others, like Pokemon or Final Fantasy just... Not the time lol.

Most popular oneshot: I only have one, Regrets, so it wins by virtue of that haha. I always sucked at short stories...

Most popular multichapter: Sorting by kudos, The Phantom Thieves In: You Have Got to be Kitten Me. Which definitely gets a 'I'm glad y'all enjoy this!' and 'I'm so sorry I'm so slow updating.'

Fics Nervous to post: I have no shame. I mean, I wrote a bodyswap fic for the sole purpose of giving Morgana more screentime haha.

Coming Soon:

One day I will update Kitten Me... One day...

I'm focusing on some original works stuff atm, so hard to say what else would come. I had a couple of long-fic ideas for Persona 5, and if I ever get around to it, some other fandoms but *shrug*

Favorite things to write: Honestly, anything comfort, and definitely anything involving characters standing up for each other (emotionally/physically/etc). Just pals being pals c:

Actual worst part of writing: "I can't focus on this scene, time to write something that doesn't happen for an entire chapter I guess."

How you choose your titles: I throw things at a wall and run them by a couple of friends and see what gets a thumbs-up/laugh.

Do you outline: Not really, I am a very 'pantser' writer. I do often have a few key scenes already conceived in my head at the time of starting though, so I'll try and connect dots to achieve those moments ahead of time.

That *did* fail me for Kitten Me, however. I had this big idea for a scene where Ann completely shuts down Morgana in an attempt at flirting at her photoshoot, but by the time the scene was supposed to come around... the conflict wouldn't actually occur.

In the end, I go with what feels right. Especially with fanfic, it's easy to see what a character might do, because they're already established - I'm just adding my own flair.

Ideas I probably won’t get around to, but wouldn’t it be nice?

Post-Vanilla ending, Morgana has a teenager body, and all the hijinks that ensue due to that.

A *massive* fic approaching if Morgana had been created by Yaldy, and how that would affect his mentality/the ending - and how it would affect Royal's circumstances. I have random scenes written, but its just so big...

A sequal-esq fic to Vanilla P5 that basically would be an entire new game in and of itself but BOY that ain't happening and Strikers totally stole my core conceit anyway

An rewrite of the plot of Final Fantasy Tactics Advance

Callouts @ Me: Not everyone sounds the same/like how I talk GOSH

Spicy Tangential Opinion: P5 has a great story but also GOD it fails to deliver on some many points. Love it to death, but there are serious criticisms to be made on it - This goes for any form of media btw. It's okay to love something and point out its flaws.

tagging: @onadacora, @chronicdelusionist, @juneluxray (No need to if you don't want! Just wanna point people to great writers :D)

#questionnaire #thanks raaj!

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sillyfudgemonkeys · 3 years ago

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You know... I just found a youtube video praising Akechi's dancing in P5D... "Persona 5 Dancing In Starlight: Akechi Breakdown (Ft. CrystAAHHL) - Designing For Purpose"

IDK I tihnk you need to add more P5 praises in your book XD :p

Also I believe is a banger.

P5 will get praise from me when it rips it from my cold dead corpse.

Jk. Half Jk. (Edit: Sorry I’m just jumping all around atm, cause I’m getting ready for bed. I’ll def check out the video and thanks for sending it to me!)

I don't mind Goro's dance (I think he's one of the better ones tbh).

For P5D dancers I like: MC, Anne, Haru, and Goro. (Mona gets a free pass like costume!Teddie) And I at least have fun with the silly videos I do (even if I don't like the songs in the game, sometimes the dances line up well with something else)

I think P5D's issues is 1) songs aren't....exactly danceable, 2) the music doesn't exactly match....the dance style (or character's personality, or both but it's usually one or the other). (bonus 3) they're obviously going for a hip hop/rock/punk rock/rap vibe with their outfits and style like how P3D is kinda going for Techno, BUT P5D.....doesn't really have those.....types of songs...... which is a shame cause a lot of those song genres would fit the P5 kids' dancing, see the first four vids on this tag, esp Ryu).

Like I always go into a dissociative state when Haru's dancing, cause I just can't comprehend the music playing. Tbh that's pretty much most of the cast. Anne needs more pop or hip hop queen songs, Haru needs more artsy soft songs, Ryuji needs more rap or punk rock songs, Makoto....needs.....something to crunk to so club or hip hop I guess (even tho I feel like that doesn't really match her as a character per se we're going for what fits her dances). Yusuke and Futaba I tend to block out so I dunno. Morgana is trying his best so he gets a pass (the only time he gets a pass from me). MC is fine. I always forget what Goro's song sounds like but iirc I don't like it (I think I categorize it with Ryuji's songs, I don't think they should be danced to), his dance is fine and it's funny, it's just Adachi 2.0 tbh (same as Goro, I never cared for Adachi's song either but I like his dance nevertheless).

#i also found P5D (maybe even P3D) they tend to just stop....dancing....and it bothers me #that's number 4 on my issues with P5D #silly asks #silly answers

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worryinglyinnocent · 8 years ago

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Star Force: A Guide To Rumplurians - Part Two of... Who Knows!

Part One, exploring the Rumplurian religion, can be found here

BEFORE WE BEGIN:

====

Rumplurians are a fictional race of aliens found in a fictional TV show, Star Force, as mentioned in my rumbelle fic Friendships and Fandoms, an AU in which the various Once Upon A Time characters were the cast and crew of this fictional TV show. Gold played the Rumplurian chief medical officer, Dr Stiltskin, and Belle was his make-up artist (and also stood in as Stiltskin’s human wife, Lacey, when the actress due to play her had to pull out).

Friendships and Fandoms can be read here and @licieoic and I also wrote a few Star Force screenplays which can be read here.

====

You can all blame @woodelf68 and @ripperblackstaff for this. Thanks to them, I spent a ridiculous amount of time thinking about alien anatomy and reproduction and now, well, this happened.

I need to thank @hedwighood and licieoic for some of the headcanons herein. Licie, I dunno, this might be useful for future Star Force episodes?

Anyway...

Are you all excited to learn more about scaly alien dicks?

I’m gonna take that as a solid yes! Without further ado let’s begin our second lesson in Rumplurians... anatomy and reproduction! As you’ve probably guessed, this post is not safe for work!

Disclaimer: Before we begin I’d like to remind you that this is all completely made up. No similarity to any actual aliens (or any aliens from other franchises like Star Trek etc) is intended.

I’d really love to illustrate this essay with some naked Rumplurians but

a) I’m bad at drawing

b) I’m even worse at drawing scaly alien dicks

c) I don’t have a scanner to upload said terrible pictures of scaly alien dicks

So you’re going to have to settle for some suggestive gifs and using your imaginations.

*puts on David Attenborough documentary style voice*

To all intents and purposes, the Rumplurian doesn’t look all that different to the human, with the exception of the scales. When you look a little bit closer however...

(I’m sorry I’m having way too much fun with this.)

Rumplurians are scaled all over. Yes, all over. They have no body hair, apart from that on their heads. (And eyebrows, because no eyebrows just looks... weird. We’re not quite sure where the eyebrows and head hair came from, but we think it’s the result of intermarriage with hairy races earlier on in the evolution chain.)

Their scales are not the same texture all over. The scales are generally smooth but will give a slightly rougher texture if rubbed in the wrong direction, with much smoother scales on the palms and soles (necessary for grip) and genitalia (necessary for enjoyable sexual encounters).

Like a lot of scaled creatures, Rumplurians do shed, generally once a year. They don’t shed their skin all at once like snakes, that would just be creepy.

[Sheesh, I now have visions of Stiltskin shedding his skin on board Aurora while they were stranded and hiding it somewhere for Hook to find and freak out. Onwards because that’s just gross!]

The scales flake off individually, usually a good scrub in the shower with a loofah will get them all off. Their scales get greyer when they’re about to shed and are very itchy, so most Rumplurians like to slough off the shedding scales as quickly as possible. The new scales beneath are very sensitive for the first day after shedding. On the Rumplurian homeworld, it was perfectly acceptable to take sick days when shedding.

Lacey particularly enjoys having fun with Stiltskin when he’s shedding. Many a happy shower has been shared.

Rumplurian skin is tougher than human skin and it takes slightly more force to puncture it; they tend to heal from scrapes and abrasions slightly quicker. Likewise, Rumplurian finger and toenails are much harder and more claw like. They’re fast-growing and naturally grow into points, and need regular filing, but they don’t like paring them right down like humans do their fingernails because the claws are a part of them and due to the way the nerves work, it can be painful to cut them too short. Mostly they file the tips to make sure they’re not sharp.

(As has been mentioned in previous Star Force smut fics, Stiltskin keeps his index and middle claws clipped short. This is both for practicality and hygiene when performing complex operations and for Lacey, whose soft human insidey bits would not enjoy being accidentally scratched, and whose soft human insidey bits he likes putting his fingers into...)

(No, Rumplurian women do not have scaly vaginas but their inner walls are a lot tougher.)

(I cannot believe I just wrote the phrase ‘scaly vaginas’. Twice.)

Ahem. Onwards!

Since we’ve already veered into incredibly not safe for work territory, let’s stay here in the gutter!

Rumplurians have long tongues (not like, chameleon long and prehensile, but longer than a human’s and more dexterous) and are very enthusiastic givers and receivers of oral sex.

They aren’t cold blooded, they don’t need to sit under heat lamps of a morning to get them going, but their internal thermostat is set lower than a human’s and they come from a very warm planet. If they get too cold, they get sluggish. Which is the opposite of most humans, who get lethargic when it’s too warm.

Lower core body temperature means... Yes, Licie, Stiltskin has internal balls. Rumplurian testes are kept in a kind of pouch inside the body, nice and protected from being kicked by... anything that might want to kick a Rumplurian dude in the nackers. However, the balls do drop down out of the pouch and hang down beneath the scaly alien dick in a human-like fashion (although they tend to be smaller than humans’ balls) when said Rumplurian is sufficiently aroused. The balls think “aha! time to make baby Rumplurians! let’s get to work, fellas!” and are very eager to get in on the action. So if you really want to successfully kick a Rumplurian in the nackers, wait till he has an erection first.

*Worry has to go and take a break before she dies of either embarrassment and laughter.*

YES! ONWARDS! LET’S GET TO THE END OF THIS ESSAY BEFORE I DIE OF SHAME!

Since we’ve got the lowdown on the downstairs bits, let’s move on to the act itself. Good grief, what am I writing here? *Worry takes a moment to question her life choices.*

Ahem.

As you all know from my Star Force smutty fics (they’re on my masterlist somewhere), Rumplurian Baby Making is not all that different to Human Baby Making. Don’t worry, we’ll get onto the actual babies in a minute. Woodelf mentioned refactory periods and I spent way too much time thinking about them, so I’m going to talk about them. If a Rumplurian guy keeps receiving stimuli after having an orgasm he can be ready to go again fairly quickly - quicker than a human. However, if there’s kissing and cuddling and getting breath back time afterwards and his balls draw back up inside, then it will take him longer to get ready to go again - longer than a human. Rumplurian balls need time to recharge, dammit!

And now for the Baby Making.

Rumplurian ladies don’t ovulate anywhere near as frequently as human women, generally only about twice or three times a year. They get super horny around this time because they don’t have as much opportunity for conception, but they don’t go mad, like animals in heat do.

They also don’t menstruate because their womb is constructed differently. If conception is successful, then they’ll start to build up a shell like substance around the baby that grows with it. A full-blood Rumplurian pregnancy lasts five months, the babies are much smaller than human babies when born. When it’s time for birth, the shell shatters and the baby is born in a pretty much human way, although covered in pieces of shell. The rest of the broken shell is delivered as afterbirth, like a human placenta.

Stiltskin can’t tell when Lacey ovulates, possibly because she doesn’t get as super horny as a Rumplurian lady would. He was amazed to find out that she does it once a month and to be frank he’s incredibly grateful for birth control methods.

Half-Rumplurian babies are different and depend on DNA, each case is different. They follow gestation and pregnancy patterns of the mother carrying them, so Stiltskin and Lacey’s babies grew and were delivered in a human way, but a Rumplurian lady carrying a baby sired by a human father would have a five month shell pregnancy.

Rumplurian ladies do breastfeed but their milk is very different to human breastmilk which can cause problems in mixed-race babies. Stiltskin and Lacey’s son Bae was fine with Lacey’s breast milk and it’s generally accepted that the human DNA in him is dominant. Their daughter Nim, however, rejected Lacey’s milk and also rejected Rumplurian formula. They tried a compromise whereby Lacey would express her milk and mix it with formula to create a mashup, but again that didn’t take and poor Lacey was frantic.

Their Rumplurian friend, Dr Morgana, came up with the solution of giving Lacey some Rumplurian hormone supplements, which did the trick, giving her milk just enough Rumplurian hormones for Nim to be happy with, and my word, once she was happy with it, she was a greedy little girl. Lacey was so relieved!

The supplements made Lacey’s skin very dry and itchy as a side effect (since they’re designed for people with scales), but it was worth it for Nim, and Stiltskin helped by rubbing cream in all over...

Right, I think I’ve exhausted my knowledge of Rumplurian Bits and Rumplurian Babies. If you have any questions, fire away! If you want to add your own headcanons, go ahead! If you want to write fic based on Star Force, feel free (just tag me in it because I wanna read it)!

If you think I should go away and think very hard about my life choices, don’t worry, I agree!

*Worry hits post and shakes her head*

#Star Force #woodelf68 #ripperblackstaff #Friendships and Fandoms #Alien Anatomy lessons #what the hell am I doing with my life?

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so-not-that-cool · 8 years ago

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Jesus Was a Cross Maker

Summary: Seventh year AU where Baz and Simon (and Company) start working together to take on the Humdrum, help Simon get a handle on his magic, and have werewolf adventures.

Word Count: 61,100 (part two of And You’ll Never Walk Alone. Part one is Happy People Shine Brighter, but I recap the relevant info in this one in case you don’t want to go back and see their first kiss i mean what is wrong with you.)

Rating : T

Tags: SnowBaz, get ready for a slow burn, angst, so much fluff when you get there you won’t be able to handle it, fight scenes, plot, our boys falling in love

Find on AO3 ➡️ Chapter 1

BAZ

There’s no one else on the railway platform. Just me, and the grey morning light. All the parents will come in on the next train, and all the students will leave with them later this afternoon. Tomorrow, if they’re eighth years. They’ll want to stay for Leaver’s Ball tonight. But for now, it’s just me. I’m sitting on my trunk, head in my hands, trying to think about anything but last night. But I can’t.

Last night confirmed everything I’ve always known. Snow’s a bloody hero, and I never will be. No matter what I do, I’ll always be a monster in his eyes. Dark creature. I carried him out of there, and he still turned away. I could see the disgust on his face. I try to tell myself I don’t care. Of course I care. Even more so after last night. After he sacrificed himself. For me. Courageous fuck.

He was brilliant. But he doesn’t want me.

At least it happened now. I have the whole summer away. I can forget about him. Maybe this will do the trick. One final rejection. One final confirmation of what I've been telling myself for years. I try to think about something else. Anything else.

Crowley.

Even now I can’t let go. I can’t forget how he told me to protect myself. Can’t forget him calling my name, calling for me... Can’t forget his hands on my shirt. Or the smell of smoke as he slept in my bed. How am I ever going to sleep in that bed and not feel him there? The way his back pressed into my chest each time he took a breath. And how I couldn’t relax until he took the next one.

I’m utterly spent. I fed before the fight, but then I used more magic in a few hours than I would normally do in weeks. And then I couldn’t sleep. And I couldn’t stay.

Part of me regrets leaving. If Bunce hadn’t been there, maybe we could have talked… maybe…

No. This is exactly why I had to go. I can’t keep up this stupid dream anymore. It’s sick. To want something you know you can’t have. To obsess about it. The only sane thing is to move on.

But I can’t.

SIMON

I don’t think about Watford when I’m in care. I don’t let myself. I don’t think about the food or my room or Penny or Agatha or the Mage. It hurts too much to be tormented with all the good things you can’t touch. But thinking about Baz has always been the exception. He never was a good thing, never a thing I thought I’d miss, so he wasn’t off limits. I’d spend all summer wondering what he was up to, what he was plotting for me… Like last summer, I grew three inches and I kept wondering if I’d finally be taller than him. Kept imagining what it would be like to look down on him, finally. But I got back and he was still taller than me. And I think he’s grown since then, too.

Only, I don’t think I mind so much now. I kind of like it. Actually, the more I think about it, I like a lot of things about Baz. I always thought I was dead jealous; of how strong he is, and graceful, and good at sports, and magic, and languages. But now I just admire it. It’s just… cool. I dunno. I mean, don't get me wrong. There's still so many things about him that drive me mad. He's so smug and posh and even when we're not fighting, he still doesn't let his guard down. I still never know what he's thinking. But...

But I keep thinking about how nice it’s going to be to go back and not worry about fighting him anymore. To be like it was back in March when I could ask him about homework, and just talk... I know I shouldn’t, but I think about what it would be like to have his help fighting the Humdrum. Between Penny and him, they’d have it sorted by Christmas I bet. I’m getting ahead of myself. I don’t even know if he’d be willing to do that. I mean, Penny says he can’t be a complete villain, not if he’s fighting werewolves. (Will he still do that, now that he’s been Turned? Again?)

“I don’t think you’d have feelings for anyone truly evil.” she said before we left Watford. "And no one truly evil could be interested in you."

I hope she’s right. I know he hates the Humdrum as much as the next magician. I know he does nice things for people he cares about. I know he cares if I live or die. And I know he’s a blinding good kisser. That’s not really proof of anything, just nice to remember. I spend whole days remembering that. It fills up half of June.

Then there’s the other half. The other thing I can’t stop thinking about that’s not quite about Watford and therefore not off limits. I killed a person.

Penny told me the werewolf was Dr Lang. I remember him. He took an interest in me in our third year, and I liked his class. I’ve always done better in science than Elocution or Magic Words or any of the bloody languages at Watford. He even thought I might do well in a career in science, which was nice of him to say considering we all know I really only have one future. I was sad when he left, and used to ask his daughter how he was doing when I'd see her. And now I’ve killed him. I don’t even know if she knows.

Penny says he was bit in our third year. That was my fault, too. If I’d have only taken the were dogs out sooner, none of this would have happened. I relive the night of the full moon over and over, sometimes even in my dreams. I scare the other kids in care when I scream myself awake. I must have said something in my sleep, because I’ve heard them whisper that I’m a killer. And they’re right.

If only I hadn’t gone off… But I had to. Penny says the harness was what helped Dr Lang keep control of the beast inside him, and I’d already destroyed that. If I hadn’t destroyed the harness… But that was an accident, and I only did it because he was going after Baz. If Baz hadn’t been there… But I probably would have gone off just the same, that’s what the doctor wanted… I go around like this in circles, but it does nothing but make the black hole in my chest bigger. I can’t undo it. Nothing makes it ok.

I guess Dr Lang told Penny he knew he was going to die. That it was all part of his plan. He didn’t tell her why, though. Then someone destroyed all of his notes, so we never will know what the hell it was all for. It’s all so miserably pointless.

I get angry with him sometimes. That he put me in that position. That he purposely pushed me to that point. And I don’t even know why. That his daughter won’t even know what happened to him, why he’s gone. I’ll have to face her in the autumn. I’ll have to tell her. If my parents were dead, I’d want someone to tell me.

Anyway, when I get really low— like, lower than low, sub-basement level low, I think of Baz. I remember that in that moment, I thought it was the beast or Baz. And I made the only choice I could make. That is, if Penny’s right and Baz isn’t evil.

Thank Merlin, Penny is usually right.

PENELOPE

Agatha and I have hung out alone three times this summer. Three times I've tried to tell her about Baz and Simon, and three times I've donked it up. It's probably hard for any girl to hear that her ex has moved on, even if she is over him already. Is it going to be even harder to hear he's moved on for a bloke? I keep thinking, she has to understand. I mean, she’ll get it, right? Since she had a crush on Baz, too. But maybe that only makes it worse. Like being rejected twice over, by Baz and Simon. I mean, it's not her fault or anything. Like, literally nothing she could have done would have made them want her. (Wait, maybe that makes it worse.)

I have to do it today. We’re painting our nails, and I’m sure there’s a better way to do this with magic. Some way to make the polish go on and dry instantly. That way you don’t ruin it when you inevitably have to pee as soon as you’re done applying it. Agatha is getting bored. She’s probably going to leave soon, and I have no idea how to bring up the fact that Simon and Baz kissed. (Maybe because I have to pinch myself every time I think it.)

“I wonder what Simon’s up to this summer.” I try to sound like I’m just thinking aloud. (It’s the best I can manage.)

Agatha shrugs. Great. Good job, Penny.

“Are you two still not talking?” I try again.

She shrugs again. Morgana. “We’re not not talking,” she finally says. “I mean, we said goodbye at the gate.”

“Do you think you’ll come back to sit at our table in the fall?” I’m asking for myself as well. I do miss Agatha.

“Well, yeah, sure. Sometimes.” I frown. She shrugs and looks away. Is she going to be sitting with Dev, now? Wait, is Baz going to be sitting with us? “Sometimes I’ll probably sit with Trixie and Keris.”

I nearly knock over the bottle of Vicious Trollop I was using. “Why?”

"Because I'm their friend? You know, just because you don't like them doesn't mean they're not good people."

"Good people? Good people would have the common decency not to make out three feet from my head when I'm trying to sleep!"

She shakes her head at me."Sometimes I think you're a little homophobic, Penny."

"Pardon?" I say, mocking politeness. I'm this close to telling her. This close to blowing her clueless little mind.

(Or maybe not.)

I just tell her I would think it's was gross no matter who Trixie snogged if it was three feet from my face.

"Well, outside of that, they're actually pretty nice. Really into girly stuff, unlike some people." Agatha sighs and starts packing up her nail polishes. Penelope, why do you put your foot in your mouth so much? And doubly so with Agatha?

"Hey, I'm sorry." I say quickly. "I think it's cool you're hanging out with them. I don't have to get it."

"Thanks, Penny. I think that was almost nice," she says. She lets me squirm for a second, then laughs. "I never thought you'd be thrilled about it. But can you not..." she closes one eye and scrunches up her face, "can you not make me feel like a prat about it? 'Cause I really don't want to spend the last two years at Watford only hanging around guys who've chucked me. Or who I've chucked."

Oh. Maybe I won't tell her then. In fact, I think Simon should tell her, if anyone. Maybe no one will have to. Maybe the whole thing will fall apart and she won't even have to know. Except, that would be awful. Merry Morgana. What if it doesn't work out?

"Pen? I really do have to go." I didn't notice Agatha has stood up and is waiting for me to walk her out. "I'm meeting Keris and Minty to go shopping. You... you could come?"

I know she's only offering to be polite. The places those girls shop don't even carry clothes in my size.

"No, that's fine. Micah and I have a Skype date." It's not a lie. We do. Tomorrow.

Actually, I spend the whole rest of the afternoon looking up spells to cure heartbreak on my laptop, just in case. Simon’s always been obsessed with Baz; I’m afraid that won’t change even if his feelings for him have. If it doesn’t work out… I don’t think wallowing will cut it this time.

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