#for research and the buddy system
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matching astral dive suits
#casper darling#Jesse faden#Jesse x darling#remedy control#darling showing off#this has issues but I can’t poke at it any longer#my art#one of my better dare I say decent Jesse’s#yes she takes him on missions#for research and the buddy system#shared resonance#because Hedron & Polaris
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need everyone to look at my pothos. look at him
#his name is midvalley and his hobbies include only growing leaves in the densest part of his foliage#i got him to do experiments w propagation + hydroculture with him. and then i got ridiculously attached to him#and now hes the most important thing in my life#hes my research buddy hes helping me finish my degree and i love him#hes an educated man he knows so much about the chicago school system and laws pertaining to sex workers
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I think that being autistic got me fucked up
#/pos#but also like vent ish#ok to rb#system babbles#my special interest rn is things that harm me. get out of here who let that sink in#like what do you want im fascinated by the degradation of my body in response to trauma#and the internal lashing out of an already neurospicy brain under incomprehensible suffering#all living things respons in insane overdone ways in panic response and we dont have the research to fully comprehend#even physically threatening immediate situations so how fucking interesting is it to consider abstract threats and the effect that has on a#autistic brain addicted to the internet in a cptsd way with osdd with schizo symptoms and all this other stuff#on TOP of addiction in the family chronic illness EDS (and its ties to autism) and just so so so many things im so so fascinated#but i take fucking psychic damage even considering this stuff or remembering anything so autistic hyperfixation sessions get painful as hel#and i can't even leave i have to let the interest brain pick over articles and info vida until it calms down and buddy its trembling#autism#neurodivergent#special interest#psychology#inthrum bickerman#btw im still in front day 42 fucking laughing my ASS OFF TAKE THAT
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designing bunny hutch :D
#been doing my research and i think we’re gonna get some 👍🏼 just two#my stepsister practically has a bunny mill going… that’s not what i want 👍🏼 i want little buddies#my fave thing i’ve learned about bunnies so far are their digestive systems are veryyyy similar to horses#small tummy huge large intestine (cecum)
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hi again been a bit... uhhh why'd I wanna make this again? oh right talking about random shit. I do wanna get back into some things I left off with some friends of mine, but due to being me and it being a very hard existence things didnt go as planned and I kinda dropped it and lost interest.... which really sucks cause I have so many ideas for where I wanted to take my story ( working on a kirby au of sorts havent sorted out through the entire thing cause my brain doesnt wanna work with me :/ ) that I wanted to actually bring into existence instead of it all just being in my head or a rough draft. maybe I can push myself into gaining interest again by actually working on it again. what I had orginally thought up is no longer what I wanna go with so new things are hard to come up with. off topic from that I have so many fucking games I need to get back to and the game list keeps getting bigger and bigger its gonna drown me at some point :( whyyyyy do I keep doing this to myself.... doom I'm dooming myself this is what I'm doing. and cause I'm me I'm def gonna be forgetting that I made this post in the first place! dont you love being this mess of a person? isnt this FUN?!
#astral.tx#check dni /srs#the answer is no#I hate this so much#every time I think about how my life is goddamn awful I'm just fucking thinking about all the fakers ik in my life#if they fucking saw me and lived this life they would kts#clearly dont understand how this disorder works LOL#you all just think its “mpd” and all fun and dandy dontcha#even the personal fakers ik dont understand how this disorder works either I just wanted to fucking scream at them#and tell them their “case” is not real and they're being fictitious that this is imitative d.i.d. you're doing this on purpose#no you are not a minor discovered “d.i.d. system” who is “fictive heavy” with an obsurd number of “alters / headmates” actually stfu die#I just wanna slap them with sources of researchers of actual fakers and show them make them look in the fucking mirror#THIS IS YOU DO YOU NOT SEE YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR ARE YOU NOT LOOKING AT YOURSELF CLEARLY?!#even if I did that they STILL wouldnt back down and claim to my fucking face that they “suffer” from “d.i.d.”#yeah sure you fucking do with your 80/90pk+ which most of them are “introject fictives” from either your “HF / SPIN” or new media#and you act like youre rp'ing as them whenever they're brought up in convo & self dx'es with “osdd-1b” 1st and said you've done “research"#clearly not good research if you didnt figure out that “osdd1b / osdd1a” are “community terms” and not actual dx'es also claimed self dx'ed#asd adhd ocd anxiety depression & ofc “did” the other 2 are even worse all 3 of them “discovered they were systems” when they were minors#12pk rn but that number kept changing said 51 now 39 30 -> 42 -> 13 -> 12 yeah no way this is fucking real are you fucking kidding me?#all of them but ONE was a non “introject alter” yeah get fucking real buddy not even in active med help and your “member” count went down?#fuck off and then the last one's number keeps rising and rising this is like the worst one thats actually just screaming fake to my face#wow omfg 138pk now it was not like that a couple days ago you have got to be actually kidding me are you seeing yourself like actually rn#and ofc all of them are “introjects” from fucking somewhere and from very recent media too cause ofc it is cant even pretend right can you?#I cant with these fucking people man do you really think you can bullshit me like this to my fucking face with this shit do you honestly#think ANYONE ACTUALLY BELIEVES YOU#ALL THREE OF YOU ARE THE WORST PEOPLE YOU ARE ALL FUCKING DEAD TO ME#ok thats enough ranting out of me I'm just fucking sick of you people#get off the fucking internet#| ✨💫
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had a momentary obsession that i shall ramble about in the tags
#doing research on this old abandoned bridge that my younger brother's airsoft team used to cross for their campaigns#just on the edge of a nearby town and literally falling apart#and anyway found out some really interesting things today!#there is only one resident remaining on the other side of the bridge; he actually fell through the thing about 5 years ago#he caught himself though so he didn't land in the VERY deep and COLD mountain creek below#he doesn't qualify for any kind of land/property/fire insurance because literally no one can reach his trailer from the other side#the bridge was built in 1917 and there were at least 10 other homes on the other side & a town dump further along the road#(i explored a little over there once with sky; i got the 'grand tour' with him & said sole resident [sky & co's friend])#the same town used to have at least five different train routes#the same town had TROLLEYS?!?#i knew they had a canal system (i've explored some of that before) and only half the train tracks are abandoned but like#TROLLEYs?!?!?#they were there as late as the tail end of the 1950s WHY did you GET RID of THEM?!#i found a lot of local history blogs and just-#it was all so pretty and there were more bridges across the three rivers i'm-#i'm so sad because we had all this beautiful public transit and it's just Gone now#anyway~#i got my answers as to WHY the bridge went into disrepair anyway: the town shut down the dump (not quite sure yet why)-#and put most of the land- and the connecting bridge- up for sale#sky's buddy mike did NOT sell his property but all others had either passed on or moved away#the lawyer who bought the parcel- one of those local families that thinks they're hot shit because they're wealthy- decided to neglect it#cue several really intense floods in the early-to mid 2000s and the base of the bridge is basically shambles#the trellises are still there but literally it barely supports any weight these days; mike had it patched up with ramshackle wood beams#and some plywood; i remember crossing it around... 2018-ish? and there were just whole patches where there was nothing at all between#you and the water. skyler led the way across; the airsoft team had spraypainted the spots where the wood was safest to cross#but yeah in case anyone's curious what ace did today during their downtime at work now you know#history shit#shut up ace
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𖦹 ׂ 𓈒 NOBODY ELSE // JJK

genre: fwb, fuck buddies😼
note: guys i just want jungkook.. this has been sitting in my drafts for way too long haha sorry for spelling mistakes or anything i got too lazy to proofread it lol! enjoy tho💕
word count: 4.3k
being invited by jungkook’s mother for a dinner was normal for you and your family. you and jungkook grew up being neighbors, attend to the same high school and college later on — which he dropped out of.
it wasn’t because he’s dumb, he’s nowhere near that. he got bored, tired. his mother didn’t like the news when he told her, but she didn’t have a choice, other than to support his dream. jungkook always wished to be a singer.
some of his closest friends joked about it and laughed at the idea of jungkook being a worldwide celebrity. we could say that affected him a lot, he felt zero support from both sides: family & friends. he would often spend his days in his house, sitting on a particular part of his couch.
maybe you know him too well, you know that when he’s writing a song he would get a glass of beer, place it carefully on his coffee table, get his black notebook with his pen that he would click continuously when he’s deep in thoughts.
you know he would knee on the soft mattress beneath him, sitting on his feet like a cutie, focus on the lyrics with his big doe eyes.
you also know he would obviously play with his lip piercing, licking it, turning his tongue around it and what not. oh what that tongue can do.
the amount of times he had eaten you out on his couch, — on that spot of the couch — you wouldn’t even be able to count on your ten fingers. your friendship with him was different.
different, because you support him and understand him in a way nobody else had yet. but different because he fucks you, like crazy. he had fucked you in every way possible. fast, rough, deep, gentle, slow, anal. the last one was just once, though.
it all started at your birthday party, when you turned 25. you got wasted, he got tipsy, he knew about his whereabouts unlike you. he knew what was going on when he fucked you first, but what was he supposed to do when a woman like you, was literally begging to fuck you.
he felt guilty, he felt like he took advantage of the alcohol in your system. but when you woke up in the morning, with jungkook next to you, cuddled up, you didn’t freak out. you knew what happened, and you didn’t regret it. nor did he.
you know it shouldn’t be right, that it shouldn’t feel that good to get fucked by your best friend but god, you can’t help it. he admitted it, he finds you attractive. you find him it too.
but you both talked it out, no feelings. he told you he’d never want anything else from you other than your friendship and pussy.
and now, you’re sitting at the dining table with jungkook in front of you, his mother next to him and his father at the end. your mother on the other end as your father is next to you.
it’s normal, the atmosphere was comfortable and funny. the adults discussing work related stuff, your and his mother had already gossiped about someone else too.
it was a perfect night, except that jungkook hasn’t taken his eyes off of you the entire dinner, except when he got asked a question. you scolded him, non verbally with your eyes.
he’s a jerk. he just fucked you the night before, not on his couch this time though. it was in his kitchen, where he got too turned on by seeing you cut a cucumber. yes, a dang cucumber.
“so ___, i heard you finished college.” his mother spoke to you, your gaze turned to her and you smiled. “oh yes, last week actually.”
“what major were you in?” his father joined in. “psychology.” your mother interrupted and reached over to rub your back, feeling extremely proud of her daughter. you smiled, “i’m thinking about going back, i’ve been researching a lot on nursing lately.”
your eyes stopped on jungkook once again. he’s leaned back in the chair, one arm resting on the back of his mother’s chair, the other resting on his thigh. his chin is slightly lifted, looking at you as he plays with his lip piercing. fuck.
the parents continued the conversation, telling different stories about nurses as that came up. jungkook leans back to the table, resting his chin with his hands, elbows on the table.
he stares at you, not uttering a single word. you give him a small frown, not too noticeable. his eyes drop to your neck, then your chest or atleast what only was visible, then back to your eyes. you chuckled and shook your head in disbelief, he’s seriously thinking of sex right now.
you’ve tried to keep your ‘let’s fuck’ relationship with jungkook private, not going around and telling every second person that ‘hey i fuck my best friend!’. the only person who might know that you and him slept together is one of your friends from college, she saw you and jungkook that one night. the first night.
she hasn’t asked about it though, thankfully. it’s not like it was her business, so she dropped it. you knew he wouldn’t try anything with you in public, especially not in front of your parents. so that’s why it caught you off guard when you felt his leg touch yours, slightly nudging it.
you cleared your throat as you jumped a little from the surprise, a smirk on his lips as he stared at your flustered form. you cussed him out in your head, ‘fuck you’ you mouthed and he just raised a brow at that.
you rolled your eyes as you realized he wouldn’t mind that, his eyes still devouring the sight of you, almost fucking you with his eyes at this point. you don’t even wanna know what he’s thinking about at the moment.
“jungkookie, have you found yourself a girlfriend?” your mother asked, catching his attention. he fixed his posture and shook his head, “no, i’m not looking for a relationship at the moment.”
“he’s such a liar!” his mother pointed at him, “i know he’s seeing someone.” she said and took a sip of her wine. “am i?” he raised his eyebrow, his voice laced with confusion. “deny it all you want, but i found a lipstick in your pocket when you came home.”
his expression changed, his eyes somewhat turned nervous, scared even. you stared at him with a small smirk, taking a sip of your soda. he glanced at you, “must’ve been ___’s.” he chuckled and shook his head.
“and why would her lipstick be in your pocket?” his mother asked, obviously she didn’t believe him. “we came here together, i believe she put it there so she could use it if her makeup gets smudged.” he shrugged.
he was right, that was in fact the reason you put it there. “oh yeah, it’s mine.” you said, a small smile appearing on your lips. his mother nodded and with that the conversation was over. thank god.
as everyone finished eating, your and his mother disappeared into the kitchen, your fathers went outside to have a beer while ‘man talking’ or however they called it. leaving you and jungkook alone.
“you wanna die?” you scolded him, your voice was quiet not to get caught. “i swear junkook, i’ll choke you.” he grinned and rested his head on his hands, smiling at you like a child. “what?” you asked.
“choke me? is that your new kink?” he teased, his foot finding yours again under the table. you clicked your tongue and crossed your arms, “do you ever stop thinking about sex?”
“nope. impossible when you’re around me, babe.” there he goes again, he always somehow finds a way to get you hot. he just knows what to say every time. “you’re unbelievable.” you can’t help but to smile with a shake of your head.
“what? you’re acting like you didn’t just strip me off with your eyes.” he teased and you gasped, “i did not-“ you stuttered, you got caught. “you’re the one to speak.” you argued back.
“i’m not denying it, i did wish to rip that pretty blouse off you.”
“i dare you, it was expensive. the only thing ripping will be your balls when i beat you up.” he scoffed at your words. “c’mon, you wouldn’t do that.”
“you think so?” you raised an eyebrow and he hummed in response. “how would i fuck you without balls?” again, he just knows what to say to drive you crazy.
“touché.” you mumbled and raised your glass to take a sip again.
✩•.𖣠°˙★
the evening came to an end as you both bid goodbye to your parents, you thanked his mother for the delicious meal. he offered to take you home and you agreed, assuming you’d end up at his place anyways. but your parents didn’t have to know about that.
and it happened just like that, the moment you stepped in his home you were pushed to the wall with force. you gasped, jungkook didn’t leave a single second for you to react as he attacked your lips, kissing you.
he held your face in place by your cheeks, your small reticule dropped from your hand as you hugged him close, kissing him back with just as much force and desperation as he did.
his right hand went to grab your ass, then holding your thigh as you lifted it up. he immediately pushed himself closer to you, grinding his growing erection against you.
not wanting to fuck you right at the front door, he dragged you to his living room, pushing you on the couch. he grinned at you and he dropped to his knees, the loud thud must have been hurtful, but he didn’t waste a single second.
he eagerly gripped the hem of your jeans, undoing it and pulling it off you, lifting your hips to help him. “hm, good.” he praised you for that small action of yours, his voice enough to create an ocean in your panties.
he touched your knees and thighs, caressing your skin while he leaned in to plant kisses on your inner thigh. he pulled you a little down, holding your legs tightly and he spread them. “don’t close.” he demanded, his voice hoarse and it sent you shivers down your spine.
you gasped once again when you felt him kiss you on your panties, he pulled away to take off his black turtleneck sweater but went right back in, pulling off your panties in a second.
the cold air hit your core immediately, but soon replaced by the heat coming from his body. he licked a stripe down your pussy, getting a hum out of you at the familiar feeling of his mouth working on you.
your mouth fell agape when he sucked on your clit, your hands finding their way to his black hair, getting a great hold of them. he groaned at your action, he knows you like to get a hold of his hair, so he hasn’t cut it in some months now.
he pulled away, you almost whined about him stopping but then he spread your folds with his fingers, spreading your wetness on his digits. he glanced up at you when he brought them to his lips, licking them.
he hummed, “love it.” he said, his voice a low growl. one of his hand rests on your thigh, gripping it softly. the other goes to your core again, inserting his finger in you. his head goes back down, disappearing between your legs once again as he starts sucking again, his finger pumping into you.
your back arched, unintentionally. “oh, fuck,” your breath hitched, he smirked against you. he added another of his long digits, curling them inside you, he pulled away as he stared into your eyes, then his gaze dropped to his hand working on you.
he groaned at the sight, he’s slept with girls before you, it was obvious he was experienced, but he could swear on his life your pussy was the prettiest he has ever seen in his whole life.
“so pretty,” his voice was teasing and you gasped his name, pulling his head up. “shut up,” your voice was a low murmur and he raised an eyebrow at your sass.
“what? can’t i call what’s mine pretty?” he chuckled and shook his head, secretly adding a third finger. “i don’t want your fingers,” you whined, your hips moving on their own. “i need to get you stretched, babe.” he grinned and he continued, his three fingers now going in a slower pace.
“no,” you stopped his hand, “i’m okay, just-“ you licked your lips, his gaze dropping to them. “shit, just fuck me already.” your voice was more like a whisper, full of need. “you’re tight, i don’t want to hurt you.” he argued back, but his fingers were already out of you as he wiped them in his jeans.
you sat up straight on the couch, closing your legs. “c’mon, you fucked me enough already. i can take you,” he couldn’t help but to let out a small laugh and he nodded, “love that you speak your mind.”
with that said, he got up from the floor and leaned down to kiss your forehead, “i’ll be back,” that one small action of his is why you trust him, how you know that he is the right guy to be fuck buddies with.
he can be rough during sex, there’s no doubt in that, but you had experienced gentle sex too with him. roughness isn’t always necessary to get rid of the sexual frustration, and maybe, maybeeeee, you like it more when he’s gentle with you.
you like it more when his body is pressed against yours, slowly moving with the rhythm of his deep thrusts, you love it when he goes to hold your hand, either above your head or next to you, it doesn’t matter. you love it when he stares in your eyes with every thrust. unlike during rough sex, when his eyes are either closed or focused on your tits.
soon he comes back, a pack of condom with him, some tissues and a towel. “what’s the towel for?” you ask, he never brought one before. he smiled at that and when he got to you, he plopped down on the couch. “just in case.” he shrugged but you felt suspicious, he was up to something.
he put everything aside and leaned in, crashing his lips on yours once again. “how do you want it?” he asked when he pulled away, but he still managed to give a soft peck on your nose.
you frowned because he usually wasn’t like this, wasn’t so affectionate. sure, in other ways he was, especially after sex. he always takes care of you, but he never just pecks you in random places and asks how you want it.
“however you want me.” you shrugged. “you’re up to something, you’re suspicious.” you narrowed your eyes at him and he grinned. “suspicious?” he asked as he started to unbutton your blouse. you hummed and leaned back, letting him do it.
“i’m not suspicious.” he said and kissed the skin just above your breasts, he pulled the clothing off your shoulders when he finished with all the buttons, leaving you in your bra.
“you’re very detailed tonight, aren’t you?” you sighed and reached behind, undoing your bra with a smooth move. “detailed?” he frowned and reached to his belt, unbuckling it.
you hummed and reached to unzip his jeans, with a lift of his hips you pulled it down, his dick begging to be freed from his white underwear. you could feel yourself throb by just the thought of having sex with him again, when in fact you just did it yesterday too.
“it don’t bite.” jungkook chuckled when he saw you were just staring, god, almost drooling at this point. you rolled your eyes, holding the hem of the underwear. you pulled it off, his dick sprang free.
you could let anyone call you stupid, you don’t care but for sure you know that jungkook’s dick is pretty. of course it would be, that whole man is a god. he sighed in pleasure when you wrapped your fingers around him, his head thrown back.
you started off slowly, stroking him with smooth, unrushed moves as you watched his face. his eyes closed, mouth open and eyebrows knitted together. soon you picked up your pace, earning low groans and sometimes even moans from him.
you started to kiss his neck, nibbling on his soft skin. he cursed, it was his favorite when you kissed his body. his breaths came in ragged gasps, his chest heaving with every breath he took.
“shit, ___.” he uttered a low groan, “don’t stop, oh- please..” you hummed at his begging, jerking him off as fast as you could. he was close, you know well enough to see when he has an orgasm.
you see the way his thighs occasionally stiff, his grip on the pillow that reached his hand first is tight. and then you see his eyes staring down at you, sometimes rolling back and closing, then opening them again. you see how his mouth is agape, his low groans turning into soft moans and cries, his brows crashed together on his forehead.
he was just straight up mesmerizing. sometimes you felt like the luckiest woman on earth that you could capture him in this state. which he was in because of you, nobody else.
“please plea-“ his voice cracked, ending it with a louder moan as he reached his orgasm, spilling his white juice on your hand. you didn’t stop there, you slowed down your pace, but you just couldn’t stop.
he hissed when he started to feel sensitive, bringing his head straight back up from the backrest to look at you. “___, don’t,” he whined. you cupped his chin, pressing a soft, feather-light kiss on his rosy lips.
he lazily responded to it, barely moving his lips. he brought his hand on yours, stopping you from jerking him. you pulled away, “just give me a second, babe,” his voice came out hoarse, your heart skipped a beat and your pussy throbbed by the nickname.
he licked his lips, clearing his voice. “you still with me?” you smiled, your hand reaching to his hair, gently pulling a few strands of them. he scoffed and fixed his posture, his hand grabbing your thigh.
“you gotta do more than just a handjob to lose me.”
“more? i can do more.” you mumbled, your face already in his neck, kissing his skin once again.
“i know you can,” his hand went from your thigh to your hip, helping you straddle his lap. you both moved naturally, riding him is definitely in your top 3 positions.
you quickly handed him a condom from the box which he put on in a second and just like every time, your arms went around his neck, grabbing onto his shoulder while he hugged your body close to his with one of his arms, the other hand holding his cock, he carefully entered, stretching you good like he always does.
he sighed in content, enjoying your warm walls clenching around him. you hummed, letting yourself down completely on him, only to go back up, then to smash back down.
his hands grabbed your ass while you did that, helping you keep the steady rhythm. his head was now thrown back once again, you watched his adam’s apple bob when he swallowed, his mouth fell open.
you kissed his neck again, wherever you could reach. for some reason, it was your favorite spot to kiss, under his jaw, behind and under his ear, just right above his collarbone, you loved it.
oh how much he loved it too, your kisses were always wet but never to the point to leave his skin covered in saliva. you were always so gentle with him, maybe that’s what he loved the most.
he had been with a few girls before who would stupidly and harshly just bite down on his skin, leaving ugly marks all over his neck and shoulders, but with you, never. it could be to just avoid any attention by giving him hickies, or it could be because you found it too intimate, too romantic.
whatever the reason was, he knew he sometimes wished, maybe even prayed that this time you would mark him, even if it’s the smallest spot on his skin. of course, he would never tell you to do that, though. marking really does feel too intimate, and he was afraid he would cross a line with you.
he realized what he was missing out on, so he held his head up, looking at you move. your breasts moved just enough to catch his eyes. his fingers dug in your asscheeks as your own hands explored his body, from caressing his chest, then slightly brushing your fingers over his nipples, down to his ribs, and to his abs.
he felt you slowing down, “s’okay, take a break,” he whispered and you did so, stopping your movements. your chest was rising rapidly, sweat forming on both of your foreheads.
he softly pecked your cheek, lifting you up by your ass just enough so he can start pushing upwards into you. he didn’t rush anything, going slowly at a comfortable pace. “you okay?” he asked, his eyes searching for yours.
you sighed, giving him a nod but he shook his head. “words,” he mumbled, leaning in to kiss your skin just above your breasts.
“i’m okay,”
he groaned when you clenched around him, he felt himself slowly slipping down on the couch with each thrust he made, so he held you tightly, switching positions.
he made you lay down on your back, your legs wrapped around his waist without slipping out of you. he picked up a slow pace at first, his hands roaming around your body, mostly your sides.
you held his hand, “stop,” you whined, your sides are hella ticklish. “hm? what? can’t handle a little caressing?” he teased, moving his hand so slightly over your skin you got goosebumps.
you tried to push his hand away but you failed, his touches made you giggle and he smiled, glad he could still have moments like this with you in the middle of literally fucking.
all of that stopped when he suddenly smashed himself deep into you, a little harder than he did before. you couldn’t help but to moan, he straightened his posture and he spread your legs, holding your knees.
just like when you were riding him, your breasts bounced again, drawing the attention on them. he picked up the speed of his thrusts, sweat dropping from his forehead, down to his chest where it slowly dripped down his body.
“so a nurse, huh?” he suddenly said, referring to the conversation you had at the dinner. “would love to fuck this pussy in a nursing costume.” a low moan left his mouth when you clenched around him, “ya like that?” he laughed. “you want it too, yeah?”
“shut up- oh my!” your mouth fell agape in pleasure when you felt a finger pressing down on your clit, moving in every way possible. up and down, side to side, making circles. he wasn’t too rough, he knew it was one of your most sensitive parts of your body.
the top of his thighs slapped against the back of yours with every thrust, the sound of skin slapping on each other got mixed with the noise of your wet folds taking his dick, the couch slightly creaking along with heavy breathing and occasional quiet moans, whines.
you felt yourself getting closer and closer, the familiar feeling already in your stomach. you felt like you were going to explode, your eyes shut tightly as you bite down on your lip, your body ready to let go.
after a few more of his thrusts you let go, but oh! turns out it wasn’t just your usual orgasm, no, you squirted under him. he pulled out, watching your body shake and then slowly relax. “fuck,” you breathed heavily, you could have sworn you saw stars.
“did i s-“
“yes. you squirted.” he said, like that was something casual. you thought it was over, that he was done but then he did the unexpected, he pushed back in. “just a little- longer,” his words came out in gasps, pounding into you to reach his own climax too.
you whined, you felt extremely sensitive and it was slowly turning to be the opposite of pleasure, “i know, just a little more,” his voice was soft, he knew it was too much but he needed that orgasm.
then, his thrusts suddenly stopped, staying still inside you as he filled the condom, a low groan leaving his lips. he licked them, feeling like his mouth just turned drier than a desert. he pulled out and leaned down to peck your lips, “you did good,” he whispered.
you hummed, your fingers already touching your core, the wetness surprising you. “dang..” you both chuckled, you sat up and looked down, feeling uncomfortable. there was a wet spot on the towel under you, “you bitch, that’s why you needed the towel.” you shook your head in disbelief, “scared i’ll stain your sofa?”
he smiled and tilted his head, resting his ass on his heels. “actually, yes. you know it was expensive.”
“then, maybe you shouldn’t fuck me on it?”
he chuckled, “maybe, but i don’t care. you’re worth it all.”
#bts#bts jungkook#bts x reader#jungkook#jungkook fanfic#bts fanfic#jungkook smut#jungkook x reader#jungkook x yn#bts smut
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This is me being 100% petty, but how does it feel knowing that Jikookers were actually right about almost everything we said regarding the military and the buddy system…. and based on publicly available, factual information at that?
I’m not sure how many people remember, but we spent months pushing back against misinformation being spread by the cult, solos, and Jikook antis… all because they couldn’t handle the fact that Jimin and Jungkook enlisted together. We were constantly fighting off twisted narratives about how the buddy system works, only to be dismissed and called delusional.
Remember when Jungkook confirmed he was a cook? A certain JJK account on Twitter made a post claiming that cooks slept in a separate area and only spent time with other cooks. Somehow, that got spun into the idea that Jungkook couldn’t stand being around Jimin and chose to become a cook just to get away from him. That narrative spread like wildfire, and the antis used it for months to drag Jikook all based on completely false assumptions.
We tried to clarify, we tried to explain that that’s not how the buddy system works, but no one wanted to hear it. We were delusional for even trying to push back with facts.
Now, looking back, it’s almost funny how everything they claimed turned out to be wrong, while Jikookers, the ones who actually took time to research and understand how the system works were right all along. And still, the fandom crucified us, accusing us of romanticizing involuntary military service just because we dared to celebrate the fact that our faves didn’t have to go through such a difficult time alone.
News Outlets: Jimin and Jungkook would be enlisting together.
🐑: “Don’t trust the media. Trust only Taekook. That is totally Hybe paying the media to say that to feed jokers.”
Bighit: Jimin and Jungkook would be enlisting together.
🐑( Jay Mina and minions) : “Don’t worry guys my friends from the 1million and one imaginary group chats I am in said they would be separated after 5 weeks. They are Koreans who have been through the process so they know. Don’t mind jokers, they will be slapped in the face after 5 weeks.”
5 weeks later:
Kmedia: Jimin and Jungkook have been deployed to the artillery battalion in the 5th division.
🐑 : “DON’T trust the media. They are lying. We only trust TAEKOOK”
Jimin writes letter mentioning him and Jungkook are doing fine
🐑: “Don’t mind the queer baiter. Jungkook is definitely not with him and Jokers will be slapped in the face soon. Just wait and see.”
Jungkook: “I cook in the military” ( paraphrasing)
🐑 (the cult and JJKs) : “Cooks sleep in a very different unit. Jungkook chose to become a cook because he couldn’t stand being around #that member LMAOOOOO!!! "
Jungkook: “Jimin and I sing together, shower together, spend time together……..”
🐑: (Ignore him) Those who don’t ignore him: “so what? They are in the same base so they probably see each other once in a while. They all shower together! It’s not a honey moon…… "
🐑: “They don’t room together”
Jimin: “Jungkook and I are in the same dorm.”
🐑: “He is lying. He is a liar just making things up to feed his cult! Jungkook is not around that p!g!”
Jikook: “We slept together, made plans together, Jungkook slept on my arm, Jimin always wasted time when I told him we should go shower……”
🐑: Egg in faces but act all cool
See Jimin at airport traveling.
🐑: “See? They get a vacation and Jungkook chases to spend it farthest from that member LMAOOO”
A few hours later: Jungkook at the airport travelling too💀
These are just a few examples that come to mind, but honestly? It’s frustrating. We were treated like irrational, delusional shippers when we were the only ones trying to speak from a place of reason and understanding. The disrespect and lies were loud. We have been vindicated but it’s crazy how these people just moved on like they didn’t spend 18 months spinning narratives that ended up blowing up in their faces.
#jikook#jikook antis#the cult#I cracked myself up writing this tbh!#no but seriously#those were some hard times
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Villain Creation System Chapter 4
Pairing/s: Invincible x Reader x Invincible Variants
CHAPTER 3: When In Doubt, Do Your Research Series Masterlist <<read the synopsis and trigger warnings first>>
In the Chinese webnovels you liked to read between classes and study sessions, male leads were given “sword-like eyebrows.” These fan-translated novels never came with pictures, and you were left wondering what they actually looked like. According to the netizens you asked, for brows to be “sword-like” meant they were handsome or ideal.
Handsome eyebrows.
Oh-kay ?
You didn’t get it, not until you got to examine Mark Grayson up close. He had thick, handsome, black eyebrows that tapered cleanly to the sides, as though done by a professional makeup artist, but the system told you that this was his face au naturel.
It was unfair.
Even his eyelashes were prettier than yours, downcast as he read something on his tablet. He’s been reading quietly since he arrived fifteen minutes ago, slid his pandesal and coffee on the empty space of your table, folded his leather jacket on the back of the chair, and took a seat without ceremony.
You tapped harder on the keyboard.
“You’re going to destroy your laptop if you don’t lighten up,” he said, not even sparing you a glance.
“I don’t remember inviting you over.”
“My roommate’s being a pain and I needed someplace quiet to study.”
“There’s a library.”
“It’s too quiet.”
“Then go sit somewhere else.”
“But I like doing things while being watched, makes the task more exciting .”
You stopped typing and gave him a look.
“C’mon, I’ve been a good study buddy, haven’t I? No scribbling, no rustling of paper or loud typing–no offense–”
You felt a vein thump at your temple.
“–and besides,” he purred, bending his elbow over the table and leaning into his palm, “weren’t you enjoying the view just now?”
Blood rushed to your cheeks and you reached for your frappe, taking small sips to cool down.
Were you really that obvious?
[Yes, you were.]
You ignored the system and replied to Mark, “I was glaring at an unwanted visitor.”
He said nothing but that arrogant smirk told you everything you needed to know.
Okay, so you were sneaking a few glimpses. Actually, now that you think about it, you were outright gawking for at least a minute.
You didn’t mean to. It was just that… how could you not look?
Sure, you’ve seen pictures, watched videos of various actors and singers in your reality. Teen heartthrobs and K-pop idols who were considered national treasures were objectively gorgeous men, but looking at a screen is a very different experience from sitting across a living, breathing organism.
Stray raven locks touched his sword-like brows and framed the chocolatest pair of eyes you’ve ever seen. High cheekbones and sharp jawline. His smirk showed off slightly crooked teeth and a fuller lower lip. He wore a navy blue Henley shirt that hugged him in all the right places–
[You’re staring again, Host.]
Oh, boy.
You cleared your throat and forced your gaze back to your monitor, ignoring Mark’s haughty grin, looking more amused than ever.
“Admit it, princess, you think I’m hot.”
“Objectively, you have ideal features.” You resumed typing, refusing to meet his eyes. “And don’t call me ‘princess.’”
“So you agree?”
“It would be pointless to say that I don’t.”
“Which part of me is ideal?”
You shrugged, focus wavering from the conversation as you slowly fell into the rhythm of work. Your embarrassment from getting caught vanishes with each tap on the keyboard. “Your face is symmetrical with good bone structure. That’s always been an important factor in determining attractiveness. You’re at a reasonable height with a good build, again, a ubiquitous criterion for determining the visual appeal of males. Surely, you’re familiar with the old cliche: ‘tall, dark and handsome’? You check all the boxes.”
When you noticed that he wasn’t talking, you finally raised your head.
He was looking at you, wide-eyed and slack-jawed.
“What now?”
He covered his mouth and turned to the window. “I didn’t expect you to actually answer me.”
“I obviously can’t get rid of you, I can barely focus with you right there. Might as well make small talk while I do less taxing work.”
“I thought you were the type who hates small talk.”
“It’s not something I particularly enjoy, but I can do it to be polite, even when someone can’t take a hint.”
He was silent again.
An jazz instrumental of Fly Me to the Moon drowned out the sound of your typing.
He then asked, “Do I really bother you?”
You arched an imperfect brow at him. “Right now you’re not exactly helping me, are you?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “I mean, do you really not like me?”
“I don’t hate you, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“That’s not what I mean.”
“... I know.”
“Look.” His hand went to the back of his neck. “I know I’ve been ass to you, but if you really don’t want me here, I’ll leave.”
His perpetual bedroom eyes suddenly looked like the eyes of a kicked dog. Geez, no wonder his exes still liked him.
You sighed. “It’s fine. You can stay here, just be quiet while I do my work.”
“Before you start, can I ask you something?”
“Not like I can stop you.”
“What exactly are you working on?”
“Annotating handouts,” you lied. “Planning out my weekly schedules, that kind of stuff.”
“Schedules? Like for arranging your dates?”
“I don’t date.”
“I figured.” He turned to his tablet, then back at you. “How come?”
“Never had the time.”
“And if you had the time?”
“I don’t, which renders your question and my answer moot.”
“Are you not into the whole romance stuff?”
You could tell he wanted to ask more than just romance. Regardless, you responded with a “No comment.”
He hummed and then finally returned to his reading.
[ Ding . Affection: 18%. Darkening: 3%.]
Seriously?
[It would seem that Mark Grayson is very fond of compliments.]
No kidding. He was popular, shouldn’t he be used to this type of stuff right now?
The system could only shrug.
This thing was capricious in what kind of information it was willing to share.
Deeming it useless once more, you switched tabs from the campus’ anonymous forums to Amber’s many, many posts. You skimmed her socials before, but with no news about Debbie, Nolan or Mark, she was your only lead. You knew very little about Invincible the animation, much less the comic book. You’ve seen promotional materials in passing. All you can remember is Mark and his dad, his mom (from your blurry recollection, she’s the most beloved character), that pink girl–
Wait.
You massaged your head, thinking.
Yes, a pink suit and long red hair.
Red hair.
You searched Amber’s photos. There was one taken during a party this semester. Amber was holding out a peace sign next to a young woman with carrot colored hair and jade green eyes. You missed the picture because Mark wasn’t in it.
The redhead was tagged Sam E. Wilkins.
[That’s Samantha Eve Wilkins, her superhero identity is Atom Eve. She is an enhanced human with the ability to manipulate matter.]
Judging from the name, I’m assuming she can manipulate matter at an atomic level?
[Subatomic level.]
That seems a bit OP.
[Is it?]
Come on, with that ability she can perform simultaneous transmutation, that’s mega OP. Why is she not the main character? Her power is more interesting than just flying and punching stuff.
[Host is so cute.]
The muscles in your jaw ticked.
[In this world, much like in yours, everything comes with a price.]
Enough with the riddles. What are you trying to tell me?
[This system is politely informing you not to deify the people here. Subatomic manipulation is something even a newborn system can do when given enough authorization.]
[<(˘ ˘ ˘)>]
Annoyed, you changed the topic.
What is her importance to the plot?
[She is a supporting character.]
To what degree?
[In the main timeline, she is Mark Grayson’s wife.]
You blinked once.
Twice.
WHAT?
To be honest you were surprised that the system gave you that information.
[I received authorization to share that tiny detail with you.]
“Tiny”? Tiny!
Your eye twitched as you scrutinized Samantha’s photo.
There’s nothing tiny about Mark Grayson having someone who was literally made for him. You even gave me that ridiculous affection meter, but what can I do against destiny?
[Host, the fact that you managed to even raise the meter is proof enough that you can do it.]
So what? Even if I get that to a 100%, that won’t stop him from falling for her eventually.
[Host–]
This is insane!
This was too much. Some part of you, deep inside your subconscious probably thought that this was just one nasty dream. One long, vivid, goofy dream. But one picture–one ridiculous line about soulmates broke through that part of you.
This was wrong.
This wasn’t fair.
You slammed your hands on the table, knocking your frappe to the floor.
Mark glanced up from his tablet. Concern flashed his face as his arm moved towards you–
[ Ding .]
You were floating. Mark, the cafe–everything was gone. You were submerged in neverending darkness. Not even the tiniest flicker of light was to be seen. You couldn’t hear anything, not until the system spoke to you directly.
[Host, have you calmed down yet?]
“What is this place?”
[This is Nothing. This is your fate if you fail to convert Mark Grayson. Perpetual nothingness. You can scream and cry and pray until you get bored of your own noise and still, no one will hear you. No one will come. You will be left in this Void all alone until the end of time.]
This was your future? This was your afterlife?
[I took you here to remind you of your goal. It matters not who or what is in your way, you must overcome them, use them to your benefit.]
“Why!? Why does it have to be me? Why couldn’t you just let me go to Heaven or reincarnate? I didn’t want this! I’m not cut out for this!”
[You may protest to your heart’s content, but there is no running away from this. You must continue forward regardless of the cost. There is no undoing what has been done. You agreed to our terms–
“You forced me!”
The system shut up.
“You forced me…” You repeated.
You wanted to cry but you couldn’t. You weren’t sure how you were talking because you had no mouth. You had nothing.
[Host, this system is here to assist you. Rest assured, I exist to ensure your victory. But first, calm down.]
You didn’t say anything.
[I told Host about Eve because I did not think that such information was so important.]
“They’re basically soulmates.”
The system let out a mechanical chuckle.
[There is a joke popular among my kind when it comes to soulmates: If God can split the Red Sea, then how about two lovers at the park?]
You replied with unimpressed silence.
[...ahem. Perhaps you would appreciate the words of a fellow human.]
That caught your attention. “Human?”
[You are my first Host and agent, but you are not the only contractor in history. An exceptional agent for the Secondary Character Grievance Delivery System once posed this question: “If the red string of fate were real, do you think it can be cut?”]
“I’m guessing the answer is yes.”
The system played out a bell sound, indicating that you were correct. [That host cut enough threads of fate to make a kimono. I’m sure my Host will become an even more amazing homewrecker!]
“Gee, thanks . But–” You didn’t appreciate being compared to a homewrecker, but you could tell it was doing its best to help you “–thanks.”
[˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶]
“Okay,” you said. “I think I’m ready.”
[Are you sure?]
“Yes. Send me back. Please.”
[All right. Preparing for transfer…rewinding–]
[ Ding .]
You were back at The Mug.
You glanced at the table. The frappe was still there, and Mark was still reading peacefully.
Your laptop was showing the anonymous discussion forum.
[I switched the tabs in case Host needed time to recover.]
You smiled.
You then clicked on Eve’s photo.
She could be useful.
[Maybe. It certainly will not hurt to have options.]
As you pondered over what to do next, Mark yawned.
You checked the time, it was barely past ten. “Tired this early in the morning?”
“I work late.”
“Modeling?”
He gave you a look.
“What?”
“Did you just make a joke?”
“Don’t make a big deal out of it.”
“I knew you thought I was sexy.”
“ Enough . We had this song and dance just twenty minutes ago.” You sipped on your frappe.
“What can I say, I like to boogie.”
You coughed out whipped cream. “I can’t believe you just said ‘boogie.’”
His grin deepened and he leaned forward. “What kind of music do you like to dance to?”
“Not much of a dancer.”
“Then what kind of music do you like?”
“Anything that’s good.”
He pouted.
“It’s the truth. As long as the beat is fun I don't care about the genre.”
His finger trails the screen of his tablet absentmindedly. “You listen to rock bands?”
“Sure.”
The finger stopped.
“I wouldn’t call myself an outright fan, I don’t go out of my way to attend concerts or anything.”
“You’ve never been to a concert?”
“No, I’ve been to one with some friends. I found the ride home more enjoyable.” Concerts were expensive. They were also loud, packed and too much trouble than they’re worth. The body odor clung to you for days. You shivered at the memory.
Mark snapped his fingers. “Just one? You’re basically a virgin.” He said the last part a little too loudly.
Your shoulders tensed. Several students turned their faces to look at your table.
Mark flinched under your glare.
“Don’t be crude,” you reprimanded.
“Sorry–but hey, if you’re interested, there’s this…” He trailed off.
“There’s this what?”
He grabbed his chin, thinking. Then he shook his head. “No, it’s nothing.”
“If you say so.”
You both did your own thing until Mark’s watch beeped.
He cringed as he read whatever message was sent to him.
You peered over your monitor. “Your girlfriend looking for you?”
He gave you a weak smile. “No, it’s my boss. I gotta go.”
“What kind of part-time job just calls you out of the blue?”
“A very sucky one.” He put his tablet back inside his bag and grabbed his jacket. “A sucky, sucky one who doesn’t believe in a work-life balance.”
“Sounds like a real buttmunch.”
He snorted. “Buttmunch?”
“You disagree?”
He shook his head, still smiling. “You’re right, he’s a gargantuan buttmunch.”
He started walking but stopped before he passed your seat. His arm slid over the back of your chair and he leaned close enough for you to see his collar bones peeking under his shirt. He smelled like soap.
“And by the way,” he whispered, “I don’t have a girlfriend.”
He held your stare with those umber eyes.
He smirked, pulled back and left.
You heard a ding from the system, followed by a congratulations, but you ignored it.
[Host, are you all right? Your temperature suddenly spiked, and why are you covering your mouth?]
“Just–” the hand on your mouth moved to your eyes “–just let me be for a moment.”
[Affection: 24%]
***
You finished today’s to-do list by saying goodbye to Amber after another tutoring session. She was so stressed for the upcoming exam that all the two of you talked about was academics, no gossip or unnecessary chatting. Normally, you would have preferred that type of interaction, but there was no window to ask about Eve.
Left with nothing else to do, you returned to your dorm and headed straight for the shower.
According to the system, the World Consciousness ensured that you wouldn’t get a roommate. A small boon in the grand scheme of things, but one you appreciated.
You starfished on your bed, the mild smell of soap enveloped you and you fell asleep.
You dreamt of relaxing in a swimming pool-sized mug, the hot coffee eased your joints. A giant flying pandesal hovered around you, calling you princess before diving in the middle of the mug.
[Host.]
You startled awake. “Huh?”
[Host, get up.]
You felt around the bed for your phone. Squinting, you checked the time: 23:22.
[Something is wrong. Get up.]
Before you could tell it to blow itself, it flashed you Mark’s corruption status.
[Darkening: 6%]
That got you up.
“What happened? I haven’t done anything.”
[I think it would be best if you saw for yourself.]
Your phone suddenly started playing the news, its volume set to maximum.
“Thousands of dollars worth of property damage, hundreds of civilians injured and dozens are presumed dead in the wake of Invincible’s fight against–”
You put on pants and an Upstate University sweatshirt. “Can you help me find him?”
The system presented a map with a blinking red dot. He was right here, within school grounds.
[He’s on the rooftop of the main building.]
The main building is off limits this time of night. He must’ve flown there. But how the heck were you supposed to get there?
[Leave it to this system, Host!]
***
Mark Grayson sat on the edge of the roof, reclined over his arms.
It was almost midnight so the usual hustle-bustle has calmed down.
His mind wandered over to a certain woman. Did you get home safely? Were you still with Amber?
He glanced over the campus and over the rest of the city. Everything was quiet here. Peaceful.
If he was this far away, he didn’t have to look at all those people he broke. Their homes were in shambles and they all blamed him–
Huwhahh
A monstrous sound from the stairway had him on his feet immediately. “Who’s there?!”
“Huhuuuuwahhhhuu”
You pushed against the rooftop door and crawled out of the stairs, wheezing.
Mark stopped himself from stepping forward and speedily threw his civilian clothes over his suit.
You were on your hands and knees, breathing like you’ve been running.
“Jesus, are you okay?” He called out your name.
“Hm?” Your head bobbed up. “Mark? Why’re you here?”
“Me? What are you doing? What’s wrong?”
“I–I–” Your nose almost hit the floor but he caught you.
“Is someone trying to hurt you?”
“No, no.” You closed your eyes and concentrated on breathing first. Once you were back to normal you looked at him properly. “Hi.”
“...hi.”
“I didn’t think anybody would be here.”
“For what, your dying goose roleplaying act?” He helped you sit. “Why’re you here?”
You mumbled something, refusing to make eye contact.
“What?”
“I said–” you appeared just about ready for the Earth to swallow you whole “–I wanted to see if there really is a White Lady here.”
“White Lady?”
Every school has a ghost story, especially universities. Wayne Technical Academy had the giant ghost bat, Metropolitan State had a headless librarian, and Upstate University had the White Lady haunting the main building.
Mark blinked. “Seriously?”
“Amber told me about it.”
“You believe in ghosts? You ?”
Your recovering cheeks heated up again. “I just wanted to see.”
“Ghosts aren’t real.”
“They’ve never been proven but they’ve not been disproven either–why am I explaining myself to you?”
“Why were you out of breath?”
“I was, uh–” You kept your eyes on the ground. “I was fine walking around the halls when I heard footsteps behind me and I–I bolted up the stairs.”
He blinked more slowly this time. Then his arms covered his stomach as he cackled.
“Mark!”
“C’mon, that’s hilarious!”
“It’s not that funny.” You lightly hit his shoulder and he raised his hands up.
“Sorry, sorry.”
“Now it’s your turn. Why are you here? This place is off-limits.”
He wiped a tear away. “I wanted to be alone, really alone.”
“Oh.”
“Not going to ask why?”
“No.” You looked over his shoulder and at the buildings. “I have days like that, too.”
Mark watched you for a while, then he sat beside you and you admired the lights together.
The speakers scattered across the campus played the sound of a bell, signaling midnight.
He got up, patted the dust off his rear and wiped his palms over his thighs. He gave you his hand. “Come on. I’ll walk you back.”
***
As expected, there were few people outside during this time. The trip back to your dorm was uneventful, but you appreciated that Mark didn’t try to engage in small talk.
“This is my building.”
“And?”
“Aaand thanks. You can go now.” That came out colder than you intended. “I’m sure you’re tired so thank you. Again.”
“Don’t you want me to check under your bed for any monsters?”
“There’s no need, I’m sure the demons in my closet scared them off.”
He laughed again. “All right, all right, I know when to take a hint.”
You cocked an eyebrow.
He grinned.
You rolled your eyes. “Good night, Mark.”
“Good night, princess.”
The door clicked behind you and you started walking towards the elevator.
[Excellent work, Host!]
Pink and black contrasted against each other as Mark Grayson’s current status floated in front of you.
[Affection: 28%. Darkening: 6%.]
“I can’t believe you made me take the stairs.”
[It worked in your favor, didn’t it? You’re a surprisingly good actor when push comes to shove.]
You couldn’t argue with that. It was a good thing you read about the school’s ghost stories from the forum. Otherwise, you didn’t know what lie you could have told him for suddenly appearing.
The system was too busy celebrating to notice your distress.
[The Host managed to get over a quarter of affection in less than a week. Huzzah!]
Fatigue set in your bones and you leaned against the cool metal wall of the elevator.
“I want something sweet,” you grumbled.
taglist: @weponxwrites @ratkidcalledallie @qxuanii @lilacoaks
Disclaimer: The images used in this post do not belong to writerclaire. They were lifted from the following sources:
Invincible flying
Alternate Invincibles
CHAPTER 5: This Boy is a Choking Hazard Series Masterlist
ദ്ദി(。•̀ ,<)~✩‧₊
MAIN MASTERLIST
Any questions for the author? Ask here.
#invincible#reader#y/n#mark grayson#mark grayson x reader#imagines#invincible x reader#invincible x y/n#angst#vcs#villain creation system#quick transmigration#system cheats#isekai#invincible variants#villain#read the tw in the masterlist before you read#qt#variant mark grayson x reader#media transmigration#au#multiverse
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So Loud, Yet so Hushed Pt. 2 (Thunderbolts x Mute!GN!Reader Headcanons)
Request: Need more mute reader and thunderbolts!! It's so good!! ❤️❤️ - Anonymous
Description: Headcanons on being the youngest member of the Thunderbolts and being mute, continued
a/n: i am very happy that people enjoyed the first set so much - it blew up and now y'all want more? perfect! as said before, research was conducted to make these as authentic as possible, Reader is a Thunderbolt, Reader is mute, except able to express themselves through making noises. Reader isn't a specific age, but we'll say they're between 18 - 21
Part 1
gif credit: @dailymarvelstudios, @abbydidnothingwrong
So we've talked about their support in the tower - but what about on a mission in the field?
As field missions become to get a bit more complicated, you and the group devise a form of buddy system if the group has to split - in terms of randomizing, each dynamic you my have with each Thunderbolt will determine the communication style and how you conduct yourself, given your limitations
When you're paired with Yelena, the communication is absolutely direct. She makes instructions clear to you and gives as much detail as possible to avoid any confusion on your part
She mostly handles the combat stuff whilst if anything computer-y happens, she leaves that to you
One occasion required the both of you to physically batter some guards, at some point you're hit and she immediately goes into defence mode - once the guards are down for the count, you sat up, a bit dizzy
"Are you okay...?" She asks.
All you answered with was "...hmph," with a mini smile on your face - that put her at some ease
When you're set up with Alexei and Bucky, they both are the types of people that don't necessarily find a common ground
Both of them grew up and flourished on different sides of history, mind you, so you sometimes have to play mediator to get them to stop bickering
Alexei is basically your tank, you're the brains, and Bucky leads - and with the hand signals like you and Bucky use, you teach Alexei a few so you guys communicate a bit better
*makes hand gesture* "Like this, yes?" Alexei verifies, earning a nod from you
Bucky smiles a little, not really saying anything, but just enjoying the moment
When you're set with Ava, there is a silent consensus with the two of you
Since you do not speak, it's sometimes difficult to get in contact with you effectively - so she has a little scheme
She often offers to give you a tracker that is linked to one she puts on herself, so you guys can find each other
"Don't take it the wrong way..." she emphasizes, "It's a precaution."
You smile a little, putting your hands on her arms and giving a firm nod before heading out
Ava adores you, she wouldn't be able to stand seeing you lost
And finally, when set with the wildcards Bob and John, it gets a bit quiet - not because they haven't got anything to say - but more out of respect for you
It was Bob's idea, John reluctantly went along
If you ever communicated in sign language, Bob saw it as an opportunity to gain a new skill and, in effect, find news ways to accommodate you
John even learns some of the important phrases simply to better himself and kind of redeem his past problems
"And this one means 'I love you'," Bob explains.
John scowls a bit, "...when am I gonna use that one?"
Until one afternoon, you sign 'I love you guys', and he has to silently cry in his room
These are little things in their eyes that they help you with, and you recognize all of them are genuinely trying
You're basically a member of the family, and all of it is from a special and loving place
Like, Comment and Reblog! Have any ideas? Drop them in my inbox!
#marvel#marvel x reader#thunderbolts#thunderbolts*#thunderbolts x reader#bucky barnes x reader#yelena belova x reader#ava starr x reader#john walker x reader#alexei shostakov x reader#bob reynolds x reader#bucky barnes#yelena belova#ava starr#john walker#alexei shostakov#bob reynolds
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XY
This story is a part of Occam's writing prompt challenge. I highly recommend y'all check out #occam2000 to read the other amazing entries by the other talented writers!!
LATEST REPORT ON RECENTLY DISCOVERED METAMORPHOSIS GENE
Few things in this world are as beautifully intricate as human reproduction. However, it is not a perfect system. Any number of things could go wrong during the conception and/or birth of a human being, one of which includes genetic mutations. The chances of gene mutation are never zero. While modern-day doctors and scientists continue to fight the good fight of keeping harmful genetic disorders at bay, there is one particularly potent mutation a tiny percentage of the human population carries.
How long this mutation has existed within our gene pool is currently unknown. What is known is that although this malignant gene usually remains dormant within the human body, it can potentially rearrange an individual’s genetic composition and expression when active. Unfortunately, this information was only recently discovered after it had already wreaked havoc in [redacted]. The mutation has been dubbed the Metamorphosis (MM) gene. The MM gene is linked to the Y chromosome in humans. Fortunately, a male’s X chromosome usually functions as a suppressor, thereby keeping the malignant gene dormant in afflicted individuals. However, it is still possible for the MM gene to rekindle if certain conditions are met.
First, an afflicted male must lack the appropriate allele(s) for their X chromosome to properly function as a suppressor against the MM gene. Second, the individual’s body must be in a state of heightened activity due to intense physical exertion. Lastly, on a neurological level, the individual must experience high levels of dopamine, oxytocin, and norepinephrine (or, in simpler terms— love). Should all these conditions be met, the door opens for the MM gene to potentially awaken within the subject.
As you may have already surmised, statistical probability works in our favor against the MM gene. Unfortunately, however, there remains a chance, regardless of how slight, that the proper conditions will align for this chaotic mutation to awaken and wreak havoc on both the carrier male as well as any surrounding, non-carrier parties. This was the case with one individual in the town of [redacted].
Numerous questions about how the MM gene operates and spreads among non-carriers despite being classified as a genetic disorder inundate microbiologists with, unfortunately, little to no answers at the time of this report. Further research into the matter remains a high priority.
END REPORT
***
It was supposed to be an ordinary day like any other when Geovanni R. Diaz stepped into the gym that afternoon. He drank his pre-workout in the front lobby while waiting for his friend/gym partner Evan Washington to arrive. The two men had met at the beginning of summer when they both started hitting the gym on the same day. They bonded over making fools of themselves as they misused several exercise machines. They became close friends and regular gym buddies since then.
Some 20 minutes had passed, and Evan was still nowhere in sight. Geo finished the last few sips of his pre-workout and decided to start without him. It was common for Evan to flake out, especially as of late. While Geo initially shared Evan's casual approach to the gym, he eventually decided he wasn’t satisfied with doing the bare minimum. He took on an intense 60-day workout regime to really challenge himself. Evan supported his friend’s endeavor, but the differences in their goals eventually showed themselves when Evan regularly skipped days while Geo kept at it. He didn’t take it personally; he had grown used to it, although he’d be lying if he said he didn’t miss having someone to joke around with between sets. Regardless, Geo claimed a chest fly machine, powered up his headphones, and then proceeded to get to work.

“Hey papi, mind if I work in with you?”
Geo heard a familiar voice behind him as he finished his warm-up set. He smiled as he turned and saw Evan leaning against the machine.
“Hey, handsome, I thought you weren’t coming today.” Geo stood up and embraced his close friend.
“Wasn’t planning on it if I’m being totally honest, but then I decided maybe I’ve been skipping too many days and forced myself out of bed to come here. Did you just start?”
“Yeah man! It’s chest and shoulder day today so I figured I’d start with my favorite machine,” Geo looked at Evan with a grin. “Care to join me?”
Evan only laughed in response. They both already knew the answer, but they enjoyed asking anyway as a joke. With that, they proceeded to go through Geo’s workout plan together. Naturally, Evan couldn’t keep up with Geo anymore and had to lower the weight after every set, but that didn’t stop them from enjoying their time together. By the end of the workout, they were both tired and sweaty in the locker room after hitting the weights hard.
“I have no idea how you manage to stay on track with this whole fitness challenge thing…” Evan huffed as he caught his breath. “I’d probably give up after the first day. You look good though! Your hard work is paying off and it really shows!”
“You think so?” Geo said as he wiped the sweat off his brow. “It’s hard to tell sometimes. I look in the mirror and I feel good, but then I stare at myself too long and I start worrying if I’m just lying to myself.”
“That’s just body dysmorphia talking, you look great!”
“Aw thank you Evan, you’re too kind.”
“Of course! Anytime you need reassurance, I’ll always be here.”
Evan flashed Geo a broad smile, and he smiled back. A few minutes passed before Evan started talking again.
“Hey, are you free tonight? I was thinking of making my world famous lasagna tonight, and I'd love to have you over for dinner.”
Geo stopped drying himself after he heard Evan say that. He turned slowly to Evan and saw him with a shy smile. The same smile formed on his face as he began to answer.
“I would love to have dinner with you, Evan. Of course I’ll come over tonight.”
Evan practically exploded with excitement. He ran to Geo for a hug, almost knocking him over due to the impact. Geo wrapped his arms around Evan and held him in a tight embrace. Their hugs always put Geo in a good mood. He was more than overjoyed to discover that Evan shared his feelings. He knew this hug would quickly become one of his top favorite memories. It was a tender moment between two men falling in love, which made it all the more noticeable when loud indigestion ended their sweet moment abruptly. Geo pulled away and held his stomach as he kneeled over in pain.
“What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Evan asked.
“Ugh… I’m fine. I think I just need a bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
Geo ran off while Evan stayed behind in the locker room. Evan finished packing up their things while he waited. Ten minutes passed, then twenty, then thirty. Growing worried, Evan walked to the bathroom stalls to check on his beloved friend. He heard heavy, labored breathing coming from the only closed stall.
“Hey, is everything okay?”
Evan knocked on the stall door and found that it was unlocked. He pushed it open slightly. His jaw dropped to the floor when he found Geo naked and drenched in sweat on the tile floor. His eyes were clenched closed, and his face was distorted due to unbearable abdominal pain. Evan ran to his side.
“What’s going on!? What’s wrong?” Evan asked with apparent urgency in his voice. Geo could barely get words out as he was too busy hyperventilating.
“So… Hot…”
Evan held a hand against Geo’s forehead and almost immediately recoiled from how hot it was. Geo was running an extremely high fever, unlike anything he had ever seen! Evan’s eyes darted around the bathroom as he desperately sought solutions but couldn’t think of anything due to his panic. He was desperate. He knew he needed to act fast before—
“Ohhhh it hurts!!”
Geo’s sudden shriek stopped Evan’s negative line of thinking. At that moment, time seemed to slow down to a crawl. Evan’s gaze shot back to Geo. His eyes nearly popped out of his head when he saw what was happening to his soon-to-be boyfriend. Unbeknownst to both of them, Geo was a carrier for the Metamorphosis gene, and all the right conditions were met for it to awaken. The gene was hard at work rearranging Geo’s DNA, and he began transforming right before their very eyes!
It began with his body hair. Like the other men from the paternal side of his family, Geo had never been able to grow much body hair, if any. However, he did have the genes needed for ample body hair, and thanks to the MM gene, it was finally able to express itself. Thick, black hair began sprouting out of his legs in spurts. With each hair follicle that grew in, Geo’s legs grew just a little bit thicker than before, causing Geo to moan obscenely loud as a result. The accelerated hair growth traveled up his legs and into his crotch area where his pubic hair grew in at an alarming rate until he had a jungle of bushy pubes covering his groin. His hairy balls hung lower than before after growing in size and his cock grew an inch thicker in width. Within a few minutes his entire lower half was transformed. His legs became as strong as tree trunks, and with a new, well-endowed package to boot— all covered in a thick layer of hair too!
The transformation wave continued to ripple throughout the rest of his body. Geo twisted and writhed on the floor as the rest of his body underwent rapid changes. A prominent happy trail formed on his lower abdomen, connecting his belly button and pubic region with a line of long, messy hair. His pecs grew more plump as hair ran up his ab line and onto the center of his chest where it spiraled outward until it formed little rings of hair around his nipples. His chest and abdominal areas were only covered with a slight dusting of body hair compared to his legs. The stubble on his face grew until a thick, connected beard replaced the short goatee Geo once sported.
His armpits were hit the hardest by the transformation. His pit hair grew and grew until it curled from its long length, leaving Geo with obscenely hairy underarms. Combined with the heavy sweat of an intense workout, Geo’s hairy pit smell began to fill the room. Evan recoiled from how unexpectedly strong Geo’s musky body odor had become, though he couldn’t resist helping himself to a couple of sniffs after he got a whiff of his powerful musk.
The MM gene had thoroughly scrambled Geo’s DNA sequences, leaving him as a completely unrecognizable, alternate version of himself!
“WHEW!! God I feel sooo much better now… Hey what’s wrong, babe? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”
“G… Geo? Is that you?” Evan stood in shock from disbelief. If he hadn’t witnessed it for himself, Evan would’ve never believed that the hairy, smelly jock lying in front of him, staring at him with a lustful smirk, was the same man he had just invited over for dinner.
“Of course it is, mi hermosito, who else would I be?” Geo winked as he threw his arms up, leaving his hairy underarms exposed. “By the way, I saw you sniffing the air earlier… How about you come and have a whiff right from the source?”
Evan chuckled nervously, but Geo wasn’t joking. His laughter died down as he realized just how dead-serious Geo was.
“No… You’re not seriously—”
“Oh but I am,” Geo interrupted. “Just a little taste won’t hurt anyone. Call it a preview for what’s to come later tonight.”
“But right here? In the public bathrooms?”
“Why not? It’s not like anyone else is around right now. We’ll just have to keep our voices down if someone comes in. So, what do you say? I know you want to…”
Geo got up from the ground and approached Evan. He stood close enough that his scent naturally filled Evan’s nose without him needing to sniff. Evan’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as his friend’s intoxicating musk left him in a state of deep arousal. Of course, Evan had some reservations about hooking up with Geo after he had just randomly transformed right in front of him, but between how close Geo’s pits already were to his face and the fact that it still seemed to be the same man he had come to know and love on the inside, Evan couldn’t bring himself to reject the offer. Before he could think about it properly, he was already leaning in without even realizing it.

Once Evan started, he couldn’t stop. He buried his face deep into Geo’s sweaty, rank underarms. Geo’s coarse black hair tickled Evan’s nostrils as he nuzzled against the crevices of his pits. Muffled groans filled with pleasure escaped Evan’s mouth as he indulged in the manly, sweaty scent, each sniff leaving him more satisfied than the last. Soon enough, both Geo and Evan grew rock hard from all the sensual physical touch. The tents in their gym shorts poked and rubbed against each other as they continued pressing their bodies together. For Geo, the thought of getting worshiped in a public place like a gym bathroom was the hottest thing ever while Evan was just happy he got to service a hairy, sweaty gym rat.
Evan briefly lifted his head out of Geo’s armpit for air. At that moment, Geo held his face and planted a firm kiss on his lips. Their tongues wrestled inside of Evan’s mouth as they locked lips. Once they had their fill of making out after a while, Geo began pushing Evan down onto his knees, to which Evan happily obliged. Geo’s cock stood at full mast, nearly poking one of Evan’s eyes out as he got into position. Evan was in awe as he held the heavy piece of uncut brown meat in his hands. He was drooling just from the sight of it! Not able to restrain himself anymore, Evan dove right in and guided the leaking tip into his mouth.
Arghh… Mmmmm…
Geo let out guttural moans as his friend went down on him. The sound of a man’s deep moans encouraged Evan to service him as best as he physically could. It was almost like he forgot he needed to breathe as he slurped Geo’s entire length up and down with his tongue until it hit the back of his throat. Geo squirmed and grunted obscenely loud as Evan wrapped his cock with his warm, moist mouth. He only lasted a few minutes until he couldn’t hold in his load anymore. Geo held Evan’s head down, his nose pressing against his unruly bush, and let out a loud groan from deep within his lungs as his load came rushing out. Evan whimpered with pleasure as he swallowed Geo’s heavy load, the salty taste of cum filling up his mouth. Once it was done, they both pulled away with a satisfied ahhh!
“Alright, get up. Your turn.”
Geo helped Evan up to his feet, then got down on his knees himself. Evan didn’t deny Geo’s advances, but he also didn’t help him get into position either. He had a blank expression as Geo proceeded to go down on him. Even as he swirled and sucked on his sensitive head, Evan didn’t react or say anything aside from an occasional soft moan. All he could focus on was a prominent cut on the inside of his cheek that he could feel with his tongue. Was that always there? Evan wasn’t sure, but regardless, it was already too late. The damage was done. He had contracted the MM gene from Geo.
Evan winced as he began to notice a pain growing in the pit of his stomach. It started as a slight ache, but it quickly became unbearable. Evan hunched over, letting a low groan as he held his hands against his side where it hurt the most. It felt like he was being stabbed from the inside out! The next thing he knew, his muscles rapidly stretched and constricted as the gene started rearranging his DNA.
Because Evan was a non-carrier and his immune system was not already accustomed to suppressing the malignant virus, the MM gene was able to activate without delay and transformed him much faster than Geo. He threw his head back and quietly moaned as the transformation happened. Geo was too busy giving him head to even notice. He just thought he was doing a good job.
The MM gene was hard at work bringing out Evan’s hidden genetic traits. Although he was only 12.5% Black from his mother’s side, that was more than enough for the virus to play around with. Various points around his skinny body began to inflate with muscle mass. His thin frame and scrawny chicken legs filled in with much-needed mass, giving him sturdy legs with sharp ab lines and impressive cannons for arms. His biceps swelled to the size of melons as his body flexed under the tension of rapid transformation. Evan himself was surprised with how heavy his new body was becoming.
His facial structure shifted and morphed. His nose widened while his jawline became stronger and sharper. A bushy goatee beard grew in where he once could only grow peach fuzz. The once wholly flat-chested Evan Washington now sported two massive slabs of meat resting on his torso. His pecs were firm, strong, and hung low from their own weight. Coupled with bright pink nips, it wouldn’t be a stretch to say he now possessed a perfect chest. Although his pale skin tone stayed the same, the MM gene brought his Black features out to the forefront, giving the once undeniably White young man a more visibly biracial appearance by the end of his transformation.

While Evan underwent a total identity change, Geo kept blowing him all the while. Although he did notice a sudden change in Evan’s girth and overall size, the taste of a nice, sweaty cock kept him focused on the task at hand. Geo simply took a breath through his nose and opened his mouth up even wider to keep deepthroating him. Evan’s body was still sensitive from having undergone rapid growth, which only made the pleasure of having his dick sucked sloppily increase tenfold. The veins in his thighs and cock twitched and throbbed as he climaxed and pumped out his thick load straight down Geo’s throat. Geo swallowed, sighed with deep satisfaction, and got up from the ground.
“Mmm! You know, yours tastes kinda tangy!” Geo gathered and licked up the few stray drops dripping from Evan’s tip.

Meanwhile, Evan was trembling, struggling to breathe after all the physical stimulation. Only after Geo finished cleaning up the spunky mess did he realize that the Evan standing before him no longer looked like the Evan he once knew.
“What the— Who are you!! Where’d Evan go?” Geo yelled. Evan turned to look at him, and Geo saw his pupils dilating unnaturally rapidly. “Dude, what’s wrong with your eyes!?”
Evan said nothing in response. The MM gene fried his mind with a heavy concentration of hormones, leaving him in a state of severe brain fog. Evan stumbled forward to the nearby mirror. His cock was still semi-erect. The sight of his own dick was enough to make Evan drool as he admired and flexed his arm muscles. Geo tried calling his attention but to no avail. Evan was unresponsive to his shouts. He had one thing and one thing only on his horny mind.
“More…” Evan muttered.
“More what?” Geo replied. Evan snapped his line of sight back at Geo. His dazed eyes wandered to Geo’s exposed junk, then narrowed as they met his eyes. He let out a low growl as his eyes suddenly had an intense look that caused Geo to take a few steps back. It was the same look a hungry lion gave a gazelle out in the wild. Geo swallowed his breath. He became acutely aware of the situation he was in.
“Dick! I want more dick!!”
Evan puckered his lips and lunged towards Geo, though Geo managed to sidestep him in time.
“Get away from me! Look man, you might be hot as hell but I’m not interested! I’m a taken man!!”
Geo quickly gathered his discarded clothes and hightailed it out of the bathroom. Naturally, being in the hyper state that he was, Evan wasn’t going to give up until he got what he craved. He stumbled out of the bathroom stall ass naked, where he was about to run into the perfect target.

“Man! Today is just not my day,” a bodybuilder mumbled as he walked into the locker room. Dylan was a muscle gay, and he came to the gym solely to go cruising that day.
However, despite his efforts, he struck out. He was getting sexually frustrated, which made him incredibly willing to hook up with some random stranger in the bathroom.
Dylan was as equally surprised as he was impressed when Evan stepped out of the stall with his cock out. The smell of sweat and cum hit his nose, arousing him. Dylan loved what he saw and decided to make his move on the muscle-bound hunk.
“Hey there, stud! Need a hand there?�� Dylan whistled at Evan, catching his attention.

Evan turned to him. He was still visibly sweaty and was breathing heavily. Dylan wasn’t sure what to make of him, but Evan didn’t give him a chance to reconsider.
Evan charged at him, planting his lips against his upon impact. Dylan was caught off guard but had no problem matching Evan’s energy. He kissed him back as their frisky hands began feeling up each other’s bodies. Although Dylan loved making out, Evan’s kissing style was quickly turning out to be way too rough for his tastes. Evan forced his tongue in, had an obscene amount of saliva, and even bit down on his bottom lip with enough force to draw blood.
“OWW! What the fuck man!?”
Dylan pushed Evan away and held his bleeding lip. He was glad that there wasn't a lot of blood, but was still rightfully pissed off. As ravenous as he was due to the MM gene, Evan was oblivious to what he had done. Instead, his attention shifted to another guy wearing only a towel near the showers. He ran off in that direction and left Dylan in the dust.
“Prick…”
With that, Dylan decided to just give up and get a quick workout in. He took out a rice bar and ate it as he returned to the main area. He did his stretches, picked up a couple of barbells, and claimed an open bench. But just as he was about to start his first set, a powerful hunger overcame him. He grabbed at his stomach and kneeled over in pain as the MM gene took effect.
All of Dylan’s hard-earned muscles melted away within a matter of minutes. He rapidly gained pounds upon pounds of body fat. What were once washboard abs complimented by chiseled biceps were replaced by flabby arms and a protruding, hairy gut. His pecs lost their firmness and began to sag as they became nothing but a pair of man boobs. All the while, the same overwhelming lust Evan had began growing within Dylan too.

A handful of nearby good samaritans came to Dylan’s aid after he collapsed. While they all tried to help Dylan, most stayed back after witnessing his sudden transformation firsthand. Nobody knew what was happening behind the scenes, leading to anxious rumors and worried whispers floating around the gym. While most people were too cautious to get near Dylan, one brave man decided to step forward and help Dylan. Unfortunately, as he tried to help Dylan get up to his feet, Dylan accidentally scratched him on the back. The young man recoiled and dropped Dylan to the ground as a result.
As other people began to help Dylan, the injured man stepped off to the side to tend to his wound. He felt unusually warm as he finished putting on a bandage. He didn’t think much of it and ignored it but soon found himself sweating bullets as he rejoined the group. It got to the point that he needed to take a seat to try to cool off, but it was no use. He soon joined Dylan on the floor, writhing in pain due to contracting the MM gene.
At this point, everyone in the gym had gathered around the two men. The crowd stood back as they bore witness to yet another transformation. They watched in bewilderment as the short man rapidly grew in height. He groaned and gasped in anguish as his limbs stretched out. His torso grew and widened until he had the body of a tall bear. He pawed at the growing tent in his sweats as he thrashed around the floor, massaging his manhood as hormones continued pumping throughout his body. Within minutes, the infected man had gone from a stout 5’4 to a big, burly 6’4.
Although the afflicted man already had a healthy spattering of trimmed body hair, the MM gene forced his hair to grow to what was genetically possible. His body hair grew out beyond what Geo experienced. From his chest and belly to his legs and arms, every hair follicle grew longer and thicker, leaving him a pelt of curly body hair. His facial hair, in particular, grew out the most. His mustache grew longer and longer until it practically covered his mouth! His beard became bushy and unruly with coarse black hair as it reached his chest. All the while, the hair on the top of his head fell out one by one until he had a shiny bald head. He became an unrecognizable version of himself thanks to the MM gene. Once his transformation was over, he sat up and let out a bellowing belch that echoed throughout the gym.
“Mrmph… Feels sooooo good…”


The crowd of witnesses backed away from the two transformed men. The two men turned to the crowd and smiled. A cold, ominous air filled the atmosphere. A few intuitive individuals saw the writing on the wall and left before shit hit the fan while the majority stayed behind, anxious and confused at what was going on. A few moments filled with tense silence passed, only for it to be broken when Evan came charging in from the men’s locker room and locked lips with the closest man. Almost as if on signal, Dylan and the burly bear joined Evan’s rampage and lashed out, too.
Pandemonium broke out as everyone made a mad dash for the exit. It was like a zombie attack as Evan and the other transformed men attacked every healthy man they could get their hands on. The unfortunate victims contracted the MM gene. Once infected, they, too, succumbed to genetic rearrangements. Some grew insanely muscular, and others became incredibly overweight. Hair was grown and lost; skin colors changed, and every physical feature rearranged until they were completely unrecognizable. All those transformed men wanted nothing more than to kiss, fuck, and spread their seed to as many people as possible until their hyped-up urges were satiated.
“Shit’s getting crazy out here…” Geo whispered to himself. He poked his head out of the locker room and saw the chaos he unwittingly caused. He wanted nothing to do with the madness and ran out of the gym as fast as he could, though the infected men paid him no attention as he was already one of them. Police were beginning to arrive on the scene as Geo drove away with only one thought: his dinner date with his best friend and crush, Evan.
Though unfortunately for him, the Evan he knew and loved was long gone. It would only be a matter of time before Geo forgot all about Evan, and his body gradually returned to its original state after the MM gene returned to a state of dormacy.
At least, until the next time Geo or some other carrier falls in love.

***
PUBLIC STATEMENT ISSUED BY THE SHERIFF’S OFFICE
Good evening.
As you may have already heard, a horrific incident has occurred at one of our local gyms. Dozens of men went on a rampage. It took several hours and almost all of our manpower, but our police department has successfully arrested all of the sexually rabid men and have placed them in custody.
Security camera footage shows that all of these men were physically transformed before attacking. After an initial investigation, medical experts suspect that a rare genetic disorder called the Metamorphosis gene is responsible. Unfortunately, while there were no casualties, some of our own brave policemen were affected by the viral outbreak and were transformed themselves.
Two big questions remain tonight: how did a genetic disorder manage to spread like a virus, and how did these men contract this previously unheard of disorder? The arrested men were questioned about the events that led to this mass riot. None have been able to provide any concrete information. None of them seem to recognize their former identities, citing amnesia and severe migraines as the cause.
Patient 0 has yet to be found. An active investigation continues as research efforts for a potential cure to the Metamorphosis gene’s effects continue.
END OF STATEMENT
#occam2000#male transformation#male tf#muscle tf#weight tf#hairy#hair growth#virus tf#permanent change#musk#pit tf#long fic#unintended consequences tf
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Your Hound and Trailbreaker fics are making me smile so much! It’s always a delight to see them! I wonder if any of the humans on the Ark have tried to make a break for it? Only to get into trouble out in the wilderness and have to be rescued for real 😂
Hound and Teeb’s humans are making an escape attempt

Too Tired To Wink Pt 3
Trailbreaker x Reader
• Is he sleeping? Do giant, alien robot monsters sleep? His visor had gone dim about an hour or so ago, cheek on his outstretched arm and mouth hanging open. Looks asleep. Back pressed to the wall, you creep along it. Most of his bulk is sprawled out on the floor where he’d trapped you under his berth and trying to coax you out. Moving slowly past his servos, you’re afraid to even breathe in case you wake him up. No real plan aside from reaching the vent set into the wall that’s low enough to be accessible. The slots in it big enough to squeeze through. Hopefully.
• Vents clearing noisily at a soft rustling, his head lifts and for a moment he can’t figure out why he’s lying on the floor of his habsuite. Then he does remember when he hears you break into a run. Because you’re not under the berth anymore, you’re sprinting like your life depends on it and he lunges after you. “Wait!” You don’t even look back, throwing yourself at the grate covering a vent and wiggling through the slots as his spark constricts. Trying to hook his servos against the edges and pry the thing loose as he hears you running deeper inside. “That’s dangerous!” And he yanks the grate loose and lays flat to see inside, but you’re out of sight already.
• Running headlong, you round a bend and shriek when the floor just slopes sharply and you fall to go sliding. Coming to a stop when you hit something that falls on you and yelps at the bottom. Frantically clawing to get away, because you can’t see anything and someone kicks you in the gut. And when you hear the terrified swearing, you start laughing. “Great minds think alike,” you manage as you struggle to fend off your idiot coworker before they try to punch you in the face in their panic.
• Venting tiredly, he mass shifts and still has to bend low to fit through the gap. Wishes he knew the layout of the ventilation system or had time to pull it up, but you’re likely to get yourself hurt while he’s researching. And he’s always been more of an action over planning type. Wonders how well humans can see in the dark as he hears an echoing shriek. Not very well, he bets. Plating scraping the top of the vent, he makes his way forward in an awkward shuffle.
• Finding out your work bestie has been in the vents wandering aimlessly for hours according to their estimate isn’t exactly reassuring. It’s pitch inside, though occasionally there’s a tiny amount of light from a grate and they linger long enough to try and check if anyone is around. Because if they can get out of the vents and into whatever alien central is, they can try to find an open door and run outside. Hopefully. You know that’s a long shot as you trail after your buddy and stop short at a faint cry. Your friend turning to urgently wave you over, a finger pressed to their lips as you join them in peering through the slots. Realizing this vent is much higher up than yours had been and there’s a smaller blue and red alien. And a human. And they’re-oh. Clapping a hand over your mouth as the bot groans, hips pumping and his human begins urging him on. And you can’t breathe as you fight the urge to just start cackling and give yourself away. Because what the hell? At least with yours he’s too big to have nabbed you for that. Though that person seems to be having a hell of a time from the sound of it.
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My Toxic Ex
Yandere Seola X Male Reader
Tags : Cheating Seola, Toxic Seola, Regrets, Yandere, Obsessive, Forceful Sex, Hatred, Manipulation, Pregnancy?
Words : 3,4509 Words
This Is a Commission Work for My friend @Pizza_anon on Ko-fi. I hope you like it Buddy.
"Seola..what the fuck". Y/n yelled, as He saw a terrible sight. His girlfriend of 2 years, have been sleeping with guys all around campus, as she giggles and moaned. Y/n was heartbroken, Seeing how seola clearly enjoyed it.
Seola his once pure and caring Girlfriend, was changed. She was no longer the cheerful, happy, and loving girlfriend once more. She became toxic, cruel, manipulative. Sometimes Y/n wondered what went wrong, What did he do wrong. As her habits grew more and more destructive, Y/n finally has enough.
After a ton of Cheating that she has done, Y/n was finally tired. He's tired hearing all of this news from his friends that Seola is with another guy, Seola slept with some guy, etc. He's done. And so, He simply left. He moved into a new College, far from Seola. He slowly composed himself, Getting his mentality into a better state. As he finally made new friends, and left the ties from his previous life.
Y/n met a beautiful girl. Eunji, was her name. She was cute, smart, and most importantly, Caring. It has been years, since Y/n felt loved, wanted. And it clearly shows, as after a few months of dating her, Y/n was committed to become his boyfriend. Eunji smiled, as she hugged him under the Apple tree. However, as Y/n may thinks this story would end on a happy ending. It was from happy, nor sad. It would be devastating.
Seola, Who all this time was busy having fun with guys all over the campus found herself stuck in a limbo. A sudden news, Her porn videos and naked pics were leaked all over the internet, and most importantly on her university. This made her popularity crumble into dust. As people began mocking her, slut shaming her, and what's even worse, the friends that she thought was there for her, turned out to be the monster that leaked all of her vids and pics.
They all laugh, as they sneered at her, mocking her. Seola was broken. The guys who she slept with, didn't bother to care for her. Instead they feel more proud than ever, as they still kept those videos and pictures all inside their phones. Seola trembles, as day by day, Her friends would leave her, and in the end, the were none left.
Seola suddenly remembered about Y/n. The man who truly cared for her. The man who actually cared for her. She suddenly cried, as She started to remember all of those good times she had with him. She remembered the time where the two got into a small fight, and even though it was unnecessary his fault, Y/n still decided to be the one who apologize first, which made Seola really happy and proud.
She imagined, if she still go back to him. Will he accept her apology. Will he still get back with her, after all of this time, and after all of this suffering that she gave him. Seola was stucked, didn't know what to do, what to act. But she thinks again and again, and not wanting to regrets her decision, she finally started to do some research on Y/n.
And to her surprise and shock, Y/n looked different. He seems happy. His smile, that once was shown to her, now shines brightly on the digital screen, He shares the world about his new girlfriend, Eunji. The two seems perfect, they lack any negativity, far beyond what Y/n and Seola used to have. At that moment, Seola cried. She had lost. She had truly made the biggest mistake in her life.
As she caresses the phone screen once more, a devious plan suddenly showed up. She could still win him over. She could still be with him. And even though this plan would hurt her and him, She didn't care. She only wanted Y/n to be with her again. And so, Any plans good or bad, suddenly become the pinnacle of the system. Seola laughed, as She opened a small wrinkled picture from her jacket. A photo of Y/n and Her. She knew, This wasn't going to be easy. But she knows, that whatever the outcome is, She'll have him back.
As Y/n and Eunji get up from their tiring slumber, He could see that today was a good day. The Sun was shining brightly, the clouds doesn't look cloudy. The evening air was crisp, the kind that made you want to pull your jacket tighter around yourself. Y/n walked home from Eunji’s apartment, his mind still buzzing with the warmth of her laugh and the softness of her touch. He couldn’t believe how different life felt now—how free he was. No more walking on eggshells, no more wondering if Seola would blow up over something trivial. For the first time in years, he felt like he could breathe.
But as he turned the corner onto his quiet street, a familiar silhouette caught his eye. His heart skipped a beat. No. It can’t be.
Seola stood under the flickering streetlamp, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. She looked... smaller somehow, less vibrant than the girl he remembered. Her once perfectly styled hair was slightly disheveled, and her makeup, though still striking, couldn’t hide the shadows under her eyes.
“Y/n,” she said softly, her voice trembling just enough to make him pause. “We need to talk.”
He clenched his jaw, stopping a few feet away from her. “Seola, I don’t think there’s anything left to say. We’re done.”
Her lips quivered, and for a moment, she looked like she might cry. But then, her expression hardened, and she took a step closer. “You think it’s that easy? You think you can just walk away from me and start over like nothing happened?”
“I didn’t walk away, Seola. You did. Every single time you chose someone else over me, you pushed me further away. And now... I’m done.”
She let out a bitter laugh, shaking her head. “You really believe that? That it was all my fault? Maybe if you had cared enough, if you had fought for me, things would’ve been different. But you didn’t. You just gave up.”
Y/n stared at her, incredulous. “Fought for you? Seola, you were sleeping with half the campus. What was I supposed to do? Beg you to stop?”
Her eyes burned with intensity, and she closed the distance between them in two quick strides. “You were supposed to fight for me!” she yelled, her voice cracking. “Because I needed you! I needed you to show me that I was worth something!”
The raw pain in her voice stopped him cold. For the first time, he saw past the bravado, the cruelty, the arrogance. All he saw was a girl who was broken, who had been hurting long before their relationship fell apart.
“Seola...” he started, his voice softening despite himself.
But she cut him off, placing a hand on his chest. “Don’t,” she whispered, her nails digging into his shirt. “Don’t pretend to care now. Not when you’ve already moved on. Not when you’re with her.”
He frowned, stepping back. “Eunji has nothing to do with this.”
“Doesn’t she?” Seola’s voice was low, dangerous. “You think I don’t know about her? How perfect she is? How kind and caring and loving? Tell me, Y/n, does she make you feel like I did? Does she make your heart race? Does she make you want her so badly it hurts?”
“Seola, stop—”
“No,” she hissed, grabbing the front of his jacket and pulling him close. “You don’t get to tell me what to do anymore. But you do owe me this. One last chance. One night. That’s all I’m asking.”
Her breath was hot against his skin, and despite everything, he felt his body respond. She was so close, too close, and the scent of her perfume—something sweet and floral—filled his senses. Memories flooded his mind: late nights tangled together, whispered promises, stolen kisses. But then, the darker memories followed: her cruel words, her betrayal, the way she always made him feel so small.
“I can’t,” he said firmly, trying to push her away. But she held on tighter, her fingers digging into his skin.
“Yes, you can,” she murmured, her lips brushing against his ear. “You miss me. I know you do. You miss the way I touched you, the way I made you feel. And deep down, you want me just as much as I want you.”
Her words sent a shiver down his spine, and he hated how right she was. Even now, after everything, a part of him still longed for her. But he couldn’t. He wouldn’t. Not after everything she’d put him through.
“Seola, this isn’t going to work,” he said, his voice strained. “I’m with Eunji now. I’m happy. Please, just let me go.”
For a moment, she was silent, her grip loosening slightly. Then, without warning, she pressed her lips to his. The kiss was desperate, hungry, full of years of pent-up longing and regret. Y/n froze, torn between pushing her away and giving in. Her tongue slid against his, coaxing his mouth open, and he felt himself responding despite his better judgment.
When she finally pulled away, she looked up at him with pleading eyes. “One night,” she whispered again. “That’s all I need. Let me remind you why we belonged together. And then... if you still want to leave, I’ll let you go. I promise.”
His chest heaved as he struggled to think clearly. This was wrong. So wrong. But the ache in his body told him otherwise. The way her hands roamed over his chest, the way her hips pressed against his... it was too much. And yet, not enough.
“Seola...” he breathed, barely able to form the words.
Her lips curved into a sly smile, and she leaned in close again. “Shh,” she whispered, tracing a finger along his jaw. “Just let me take care of you. Like I used to.”
Before he could protest, she dropped to her knees in front of him, her hands already working to unbuckle his belt. His mind screamed at him to stop her, to pull away, but his body betrayed him. He was hard, achingly so, and the sight of her looking up at him with those dark, possessive eyes only made it worse.
“Wait—” he started, but she silenced him with a sharp tug on his pants. They pooled around his ankles, leaving him exposed to the cool night air—and to her.
Seola didn’t waste any time. She wrapped her lips around him, taking him deep into her mouth with a practiced ease that made his knees buckle. Her tongue swirled around the tip, sending jolts of pleasure coursing through him. He gripped her shoulders, unsure whether to push her away or pull her closer.
“God, Seola...” he groaned, his voice thick with desire.
She pulled back slightly, looking up at him with a wicked grin. “Missed this, didn’t you?” she purred, before sinking down again, deeper this time. Her hands gripped his thighs, holding him in place as she worked him with relentless precision.
He was losing control, fast. The rational part of his brain screamed at him to stop, to end this before it went too far. But the rest of him was drowning in sensation, in the heat of her mouth and the way she moaned around him, as if she couldn’t get enough.
“Stop,” he managed to choke out, though his body betrayed him by thrusting forward. “Seola, we can’t...”
She pulled away again, panting slightly. “We can,” she insisted, standing up and pressing her body against his. “And we will. Because you’re mine, Y/n. You always have been.”
Her lips crashed against his again, silencing any protests. She guided his hands to her waist, encouraging him to touch her, to feel her. And despite everything, he couldn’t resist. His fingers found the hem of her skirt, sliding underneath to cup her ass. She moaned into his mouth, grinding against him.
“Take me upstairs,” she whispered, biting his lower lip. “Let me remind you what you’ve been missing.”
He hesitated, torn between the guilt of betraying Eunji and the undeniable pull of Seola’s body against his. But in the end, it wasn’t a choice. Not really. With a groan, he grabbed her hand and led her toward the building, his mind racing with what was about to happen.
As they stumbled into his apartment, Seola pushed him against the door, kissing him furiously. Her hands pulled at his shirt, while his fumbled with the zipper of her dress. Clothes fell to the floor in a haphazard pile, and soon they were both naked, pressed together in a tangle of limbs and desperate need.
She broke the kiss, stepping back slightly to admire him. “You’re still so beautiful,” she murmured, running a hand down his chest. “And you’re all mine.”
Then she turned around, bending over the couch and looking back at him over her shoulder. “Come on, Y/n,” she said, her voice dripping with temptation. “What are you waiting for?”
He hesitated for only a moment before stepping forward, his hands gripping her hips. She gasped as he entered her, her nails digging into the cushions beneath her.
“That’s it,” she moaned, arching her back to meet his thrusts. “Just like that. Fuck me, Y/n. Make me yours again.”
The sound of her voice, the feel of her tight around him... it was too much. He lost himself in the rhythm, in the way she whimpered and begged for more. But even as he moved inside her, a nagging thought crept into his mind. This is wrong. This is...
“Harder,” she demanded, cutting off his thoughts. “Don’t hold back. I can take it.”
And so, he gave in, letting the heat of the moment consume him. But as he glanced down at her, at the way her body writhed beneath his, he couldn’t shake the feeling that this was a mistake. A delicious, intoxicating, irresistible mistake.
“Seola...” he murmured, his voice rough.
She looked back at him, her eyes glazed with lust. “What is it? Don’t stop. Don’t you dare stop.”
And he didn’t. He couldn’t. Not until...
The morning light filtered through the blinds, casting streaks of gold across the rumpled sheets. Y/n stirred, his body heavy with exhaustion, his mind foggy from the night before. He blinked slowly, trying to piece together what had happened. Seola. Her name echoed in his head like a warning bell. He turned his head, expecting to see her gone, as she often was after their reckless encounters back in university. But this time, she was still there, curled up beside him, her hair splayed across the pillow like ink spilled on paper.
She looked so peaceful—soft, even. It made his chest ache. He shouldn’t have let this happen. He had Eunji now. Sweet, kind Eunji, who deserved better than this. He sat up, running a hand through his disheveled hair, trying to steady his breathing. His heart pounded, not from desire but from guilt. The weight of it pressed down on him, suffocating.
“Morning,” Seola’s voice broke the silence, smooth and melodic, yet laced with something he couldn’t quite place. She stretched languidly, her bare skin catching the sunlight, and propped herself up on one elbow to look at him. Her lips curved into a sly smile. “You look awful. Rough night?”
Y/n didn’t respond. He couldn’t. Words felt trapped in his throat, tangled with regret and confusion. He wanted to get up, to leave, to pretend this never happened. But his body refused to move.
Seola sighed dramatically, sitting up fully, letting the sheet pool around her waist. She leaned closer, her fingers tracing idle patterns on his arm. “You know,” she began, her tone casual, almost too casual, “there’s something I need to tell you.”
He tensed immediately, his instincts screaming that whatever she was about to say would only make things worse. “Don’t,” he said quickly, his voice hoarse. “Just… don’t.”
Her smile widened, and there was a glint in her eyes that made his stomach twist. “Oh, come on, Y/n. You’re going to want to hear this.” She paused, letting the tension build, savoring it. Then, softly, almost sweetly, she dropped the bomb. “I’m pregnant.”
The room seemed to tilt. Y/n stared at her, his mind struggling to process the words. Pregnant. The word hung in the air between them, heavy and unrelenting. He shook his head, disbelief coursing through him. “No. No, you’re lying.”
Seola laughed lightly, as if they were discussing the weather. “Why would I lie about something like this? It’s true. I found out last week.” She reached for his hand, placing it gently on her stomach. Her skin was warm beneath his palm, and for a moment, he felt frozen. “There’s a little piece of us growing right here. Isn’t that amazing?”
He jerked his hand away as if burned, scrambling to his feet. His chest heaved as he backed away from the bed, his mind racing. This couldn’t be happening. Not now. Not after everything. “You… you can’t be serious.”
Her expression shifted, her playful smirk fading into something sharper, more intense. “Dead serious,” she said, her voice low and steady. “And it’s yours. I haven’t been with anyone else since we…” She trailed off, letting the implication sink in. “You’re the father, Y/n.”
His knees threatened to buckle. He sank into a chair, his hands gripping the edge of the seat so tightly his knuckles turned white. Father. The word reverberated in his skull, each repetition louder than the last. He felt sick. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He had finally moved on, found someone who truly cared about him. And now… now this.
Seola watched him closely, her gaze calculating. She slid out of bed, standing naked before him without an ounce of shame. She knelt in front of him, her hands resting on his thighs, her touch both grounding and suffocating. “Isn’t this what you wanted?” she asked softly, her voice dripping with false innocence. “A family? A future together?”
He shook his head, his breath coming in shallow gasps. “No. Seola, no. That’s not… we’re not…”
She tilted her head, her lips curling into a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “But we could be,” she whispered, leaning in closer, her breath hot against his ear. “Think about it, Y/n. You could have me all to yourself. No more fighting. No more games. Just… us.”
Her words were like a poison, seeping into his veins, clouding his thoughts. He wanted to push her away, to scream that this wasn’t what he wanted. But the way she looked at him—like he was the center of her world—made something inside him waver. For years, he had loved her. Or at least, he thought he had. And despite everything she had done, some small, stupid part of him still craved the warmth she once offered.
As if sensing his hesitation, Seola pressed further. She kissed him, soft and slow, her lips moving against his with practiced ease. He tried to resist, but his body betrayed him, responding instinctively. When she pulled back, her eyes were dark with satisfaction. “See?” she murmured, trailing her fingers along his jaw. “You still want me. You always have.”
He opened his mouth to argue, but no words came out. How could he deny it when his body screamed otherwise? When every fiber of his being seemed drawn to her, despite the chaos she brought?
Seola stood then, pulling him to his feet. Her hands slid up his chest, her touch deliberate, possessive. “Let me remind you,” she whispered, her voice a dangerous purr. “Let me show you why you belong to me.”
Before he could protest, she kissed him again, harder this time, her teeth grazing his bottom lip. His hands hesitated at his sides before giving in, gripping her hips as if clinging to life itself. She smiled against his mouth, triumphant. “That’s it,” she coaxed, guiding him back toward the bed. “Let go, Y/n. Just let go.”
He was falling, spiraling deeper into her web. And as she lowered him onto the mattress, her hands roaming greedily over his body, he knew he was lost. The guilt, the doubt, the fear—it all melted away under her touch.
For now, at least, she had won.
#kpop#kpop x reader#kpop x y/n#x male reader#beautiful#kpop smut#yandere#yandere stories#seola#kim hyunjung#kim hyun joong#wjsn#wjsn black#wjsn seola#seola smut#dangerous romamce#dark#pregnancy#pregnant#yandere kpop#obsession
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CW: SAHSRAU. aka self-aware au.
i find it so funny about the duality of how two erudition emanators, dr primitive and THE herta would react after discovering that their universe was just only a game made by bunch of higher plane entities (a chinese multi-billion dollar company and its overworked employees).
while THE herta react like:
i knew it!! there's more out there than these boring aeons vs. mortals! she would attempt to pry open the system that holds together this so-called game and reach out to you, the player- as she doubts she could contact the entities responsible for creating the game. well! since she already got this far, would you mind telling her all about this snoozefest of a game she's been forced to live in? how does the combat system work? and how about that warp gacha thing? oh, you lost a lot? damn, that's rough buddy. (no need to feel offended, i lost 7 50/50s. edit: it's 10 now.)
she's a yapper. be grateful. it's a sign that you are indeed an interesting "person".
dr primitive probably like:
damn bro that's cool i guess. anyway do you want to volunteer yourself into degrading your humanity to its most primitive form in the name of knowledge? no? k.
since his universe already proven to be fictitious, might as well double down for a dramatic effect.
it all boils down to their field of research, herta is interested in how the universe and its laws work, especially the aeons, while the loser on the other side just really hates how modern humans are nowadays and determined to return them to their primordial form aka monke.
#𐔌 ✶ 𐦯 𓂃 𓂃 ✎ ֶֶָָ֢֢#sahsrau#self aware honkai star rail au#sahsrau herta#self aware au#sahsrau x reader#hsr x reader#self aware hsr#self aware herta#self aware x reader#herta#the herta#dr primitive#honkai star rail#hsr#does this really count as “x reader” ? i mean sure the herta part was quite obvious but the dr primitive one is kinda???#he just doesn't care abt u lmao#i am waiting for the 00:00 sorry if theres a grammar error or two
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the anti-psych convo is so tough to me because there is no denying the damage that the system does, especially to folks with schizophrenia/psychopathy or who are diagnosed on the personality disorder spectrum (a whole mess in itself), but at the same time i see folks on here suffering horribly with the burdens of depression, anxiety, OCD every day and explicitly saying there’s no hope because they don’t trust any type of therapeutic method and man… those are treatable conditions with solid treatments available in many cases, but they won’t even seek a solution, and it makes me sad because i know what that suffering is like
i would be in such a horrible state at this point in my life if i’d never sought help or been recommended DBT treatment, but i also recognize the privilege and straight up luck I had in receiving help and getting better. idk i was glad to see your nuanced response on it because there are SO MANY anti-psych messages that boil down to cutting people off from resources that could help them, like free DBT workbooks or OCD treatment programs online, but none of that can be considered because it’s “brainwashing yourself into feeling better”. it’s like a fundamental misunderstanding of how our minds work and how much value we should be putting into the destructive thoughts many of us develop due to trauma and poor childhood environments
idk i have no solutions here, i just appreciated the nuance because i usually see nothing but hardline stances on either side. it’s not just one path to healing, and even an imperfect system can bear fruit, but we also can’t discount the horrific amount of power psych practitioners wield to hurt people
Thank you, I appreciate all that you've said here. People are not political abstractions; we need to take the personal steps that will help us to get by in our lives, and that frequently means engaging within an unjust system or paradigm and getting what use we can out of it. A lot of therapy is awful, system-justifying stuff, but it also helps people a lot to have a dedicated, private talk buddy. Psychiatric drugs are used to immobilize and passify people, and they also make a lot of people feel better. Sometimes even a pretty subpar psychological or psychiatric treatment is what a person prefers over having to kill themselves or not be able to hold down a job, and while that's not a situation of unconstrainted choice, it still is their right to make that decision, in my view.
I think a lot of people online can be very politically dogmatic and puritanical, and also that a lot of heavy internet users are traumatize and in hopeless-feeling situations and have become quite compulsive about projecting that hopelessness outward at others and at every potential way to get better, because if there is no point in trying then they get to just rest and allow themselves to feel badly. Sometimes that's where a person is at! Fine. Wallow. It preserves energy. But a lot of people eventually have to develop agency for their own sake, and learn that even a moderate reduction in suffering is actually worth working at, and can eventually snowball in a positive direction. I hate anti-depressants; I think they are dangerous, poorly supported by research and over-recommended, but if someone is suicidal and some anti-depressants keep them kicking around long enough to stay housed, get some additional help, and then make choices that more materially improve their lives, what's the issue with them using them? Hell if someone just happens to like how those meds feel, do I think we should take them away? Absolutely not. I don't think anyone should have the authority to take those things away. And that includes psychiatrists!
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fic where kim develops shivers?
1. do we need this? 2. how badly do we need this? 3. i'm already writing it, please need this.
idea inspo from @zoetheduckling beautiful art: https://www.tumblr.com/bagmanunlucky/779845837859815424/zoetheduckling-my-liege-i-have-been-searching
i'm a writer & researcher, but it's my first fanfic for the characters running through my mind 24/7 since 2019. i flesh out the outline, themes, emotional arc, etc. constantly. focus is shivers, but also viewing skills through the lens of internal family systems (IFS) work. kim is so repressed, his parts need the help of a certain sorry cop to let his exiled parts surface and get in touch with his Self.
i have never been obsessed with something as much as de or kim kitsuragi. if you like a writing style that's been trying to emulate Kate Chopin, Rupi Kaur and Stephen King their whole life, stay tuned!
update for those interested:
i love all the people asking to be tagged when i eventually post it, but i fear i prematurely teased my fic because of how long my research and writing process is. i can't do wip because i don't write chronologically and also i don't wanna do wip cause that seems anxiety inducing. lol if anyone wants to be a fic writing accountability buddy please comment <3
#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#de#de skills#de fanfic#de harry du bois#de kim kitsuragi#de harry#de kim#de shivers#writers and poets#writers on tumblr#lgbtq fanfiction#lgbtq characters#lgbtq#lgbtqia#kimharry#harrykim#RCM#Revachol#supernatural#smutty smut smut#smutty#sorry cop#art cop#bagmanunlucky#rtrg42#ifs#parts work
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