At the end of my latest TLT reread and it’s been physically painful attempting to read the last 40+ pages of Nona. Like, the short shrift that Gideon/Kiriona gets given by the people in the story…the theoretical good guys who honestly only see her as a thing, as a means to an end with an inconvenient dead soul attached to it… It makes me want to rip my own heart out of my chest.
Nobody has cared about Gideon her whole life. Most people, in fact, if they remembered about her at all, went out of their way to tell her how much they wished she didn’t exist. In the final chapters of Gideon, she finally gets the thing she’s been desperate for her whole life: somebody telling her that they need her, they care that she exists, and they badly want her to go on doing it. This allows her to make peace with the prospect that at the ripe old age of 18, she needs to die so that that person can go on living and living and living, using the castrated remnants of her soul as fuel to do so. Not a great way to go, but at least Gideon would get to be useful to somebody, would get to be remembered for something.
And then she wakes up in the wrong body, and finds out that her sacrifice - her attempt to be useful in the most selfless way possible, in that her self will no longer exist - has been rejected. And not only that, but the person she tried to give herself to - the one who was supposed to care about her - went to extreme lengths to make completely sure that she no longer remembered about Gideon.
She literally cut Gideon out of her brain.
And now, drifting along in the worst sort of half life where she’s inhabiting her body but it’s no longer really hers, in very obvious fashion - there’s holes in it, her heart is missing, and it’s got her shitty father’s handprints all over it (not even touching how much of a violation that is), indelibly - she finally meets back up with the small group of people who could theoretically be relied upon to be glad to see her again.
But then the one who was supposed to care about her most tries to kiss her (massively OOC for Harrow), and turns out to not even be there - it’s some weird baby inhabiting her body, and doing a really shit job of it too. The rest of them won’t stop talking about how they need her to break into the Tomb - as if she was just another key, same as the ones they worked together to acquire in Canaan House, just bigger and more inconvenient - and/or how they both fucked and killed her mom, who also (surprise, surprise) wished that Gideon had never existed, but saw her as a thing that needed to be done for the good of the mission.
Ultimately, they all make it abundantly clear - Palamedes, Camilla, Pyrrha, and especially Nona, all these people who are supposed to be kind and good and right - that they would prefer she wasn’t there. That it just be her body, with no Gideon attached - at least not Gideon the way she is now, broken and rejected and miserable. They would all far have preferred that she not have her own inconvenient thoughts and feelings and desires and impulses - that she just be inanimate and let the important people, the grown ups, get things done.
They wish she didn’t exist. Same as everybody else in her life, save one, and now she’s left wondering whether Harrow really meant it at all. Because if she did, she wouldn’t have left Gideon to Kiriona’s fate.
And honestly? Really, truly? I know everybody in the fandom loves Pal and Cam and Nona and Pyrrha, but in the end I couldn’t give less of a shit about them. They are fucking side characters, and as intriguing as Nona has been from a worldbuilding standpoint, I ultimately resent having been forced to read 400+ pages of filler bullshit about fucking side characters. I am a butch, and I’m here for my sarcastic, loving, angry, vulnerable, forgiving, and yes, inconvenient sword butch. I’m here for Gideon. But Gideon has been fridged for the last two books of the series in which she is supposed to be a, if not the, main character.
And it feels like almost nobody else in the fandom feels the same way, which, fine. I’m used to that. I’m also used to being told I’m projecting; and I’m used to being told that I’m inconvenient too, in my thoughts and my opinions and the mere fact of my existence. I spent the first eighteen years of my life being told I was inconvenient. Yet another point of overidentification with Gideon.
But in case anybody still thinks that Nona proves that Gideon was an asshole all along, think about all of the above. Think about how it would make you feel to come back from not just death but from the erasure of your existence, something you chose in order to save the life of someone you loved, and be told that you’re inconvenient. Think about how you’d feel if you’d been told all your life that it would be better for everyone if you didn’t exist. And then tell me that Kiriona isn’t in the right and that I should give a rat’s ass what happens to literally anybody else.
It’s Kiriona Hours up in this House, butches. We’ve spent long enough caring about people who would prefer we weren’t around. For once in our entire lives we were told we were important; we were told we mattered; we were told we were the main character. We were going to, if not get the girl and save the world, at least get to do something real, something important, something like being the hero.
But that’s over now; we’re back to being wrong and bad and inconvenient thanks to the simple fact of our existence. So it’s time to embrace it. Let’s be a little shit. Let’s be kind of a dick. Let’s have our own agenda, let’s play our cards close to our heartless chest, let’s allow our circle of empathy to contract to ourselves and maybe one more person. That’s where I’m at right now. And I don’t see that changing anytime soon.
Your posts got me thinking about their dynamic then I wrote a fic that was supposed to be platonic but midway through I realized it could actually be interpreted as romantic too and now I'm just sad about how little time they'll have together
First of all, you have a lovely icon, second, I’m so honored… I finally read Not a bad way to go and it was soo so good like. My god!!! Pre-canon is underused and you did so many interesting things with it.
It sounded like a cruel joke, that the one who needed her concern the most was also the one least interested in it.
^^^ go read it go read it
Chilchuck was drunk enough that he needed to hold onto the walls not to fall, but apparently still sober enough to remember emotional vulnerability was his worst enemy, as he made sure to avert her eyes and said:
“Namari made me come talk to you ” to make it clear he wasn't being nice voluntarily.
Yeah.
“Of course I'm scared of dying.” He scoffed. Did she really think so little of him? “But if I could choose, I would want to die doing something I love, like drinking. Or maybe fucking,”
Maybe you wish you didn’t know but my new favorite HC because of this is that Chil dies yes prematurely not of liver failure though but during coitus. Especially if marchil, the thought of him busting a nut and his heart giving out makes me laugh so hard. My god. Lmao. Oh god. Lmfao. Worst day of her life
Marcille knew Chilchuck wasn't a kid, but she often struggled to take him seriously as an adult because he was just so adorable and small. In this moment, however, she saw them exactly for what they were, even if it was just a glimpse. A sheltered, naive little girl trying to tell a tired, much more experienced man how to live the rest of his life.
Standing ovation
She tried to find an explanation to give him, but she couldn't even find one for herself. Why would she miss him? He was just Chilchuck, her coworker, Chilchuck who was cold, aloof, sometimes crass, evasive, and even outright mean. He who was level headed, reliable, trustworthy, perceptive and clever. He who had the least time left, even in a best case scenario. “I guess that despite your best efforts, there's still a lot to like about you.”
This fic goes so hard, standing ovation pt 2
“I just think it's better if we don't get too close. Don't you agree?”
“I… maybe” she said, uncertain as he didn't know how to feel about that. Caring about people would only hurt her in the wrong run, she knew that, but unfortunately she couldn't help it.
I looove how they can be read to be similar on this aspect. My hand clenching around my phone as I rear up to rant about Marcille and the way she does keep people at an arm’s length subconsciously again my god my goood. Obsessed with this obsessed with this, underused for marchil. Terrified of loss through death vs rejection duo I love youuu
Brilliant ending I’m in shambles. I’m not gonna spoil it
You get marchil so much you truly do. The way they mesh, the way their views on mortality clash and both soothe & bruise… He doesn’t have much time left even in best case scenario (which Mr I won’t eat well I’ll drink and smoke a lot I’ll stress all day every day is determined to not make happen) which makes it all the more meaningful for Marcille’s arc when she learns from him to finally enjoy the present moments… It’ll only be a fraction of her life, but to him he’s giving her the rest of his life. What are some decades of love worth? Worth it, surely, if nothing else
i haven't played hsr since like. 1.1 and i have no idea what's going on in there so i just wanted to say how wild it is to me when i stumble upon feixiao thirsts AND SOME GUY IS JUST OUT THERE?? BEHIND THE DOOR?? bro is the listener???
that is moze and he is forever forced to listen to feixiao fuck absolutely nasty with her lover (me) 😔😔😔 his lore is that he’s her left hand man but also trying to kill her for Reasons i would recommend reading his character stories for because they’re written quite well so he’s always prowling. sneaking around. trying to find an opportunity to do what he thinks he wants to do. basically he is always in the vicinity and as a result has to listen to feixiao clap cheeks like nobody’s business i fear
Your Rook would love you unconditionally and go to all four corners of Twisted Wonderland and back for you to hunt whatever beast you wish on a whim. His presence like the sun, warm and always there— adding light into world with each step he takes.
My Rook would play me like a fiddle with his sweet words and lead me on, only to disappear and fawn over someone else once he’s bored 😍
Night at the Museum: Redesigning Characters 1/4(?)
Character profile: Frank "Noses" Capone
This character is based off of and takes inspiration from the historical Frank Capone.
Real Name: Salvatore "Frank" Capone
Nickname and Meaning: Noses - He got this nickname from being inquisitive and being unafraid to stick his nose into other people's business, even if it gets him into trouble.
Age: 28 (July 16, 1895)
Time Period: Frank is from America's Prohibition in the 1920s, to be exact, hes from April 1st, 1924 Chicago, just before he and a group of Mafioso's went to the polling station near the Western Electric Hawthorn plant.
Family: James "Jimmy" Vincenzo Capone, Raffaele "Ralph" James Capone, and Alphonse "Al" Gabriel Capone + Three younger brothers and one sister that wasn't brought back.
(Headcanons under the cut)
Based on/taken from History:
involved in the Five Points Gang with mobster John Torrio as a kid
Rumored to be queer because he never had an open interest in women/having sex with women like his brothers
Had a kid??? But then took it away from his fiancé??
Nickname was Noses?
Smartest of the eldest Capones
Killed when 70 plain clothes police officers arrived at W 22nd St & S Cicero Ave, Cicero, IL 60804 on April 1st, 1924. He didn’t have time to pull his gun out and was shot so many times, two other bystanders were killed/injured
described as mild-mannered, intelligent and immaculately-dressed
Thought to have ordered 500 deaths since joining the Chicago outfit (1919-1921 to 1924)
“you never get no talk back from a corpse”
+ Intelligent
+ Social
+ Hard-working
- Quick to anger
- Unstable moods
My own silly headcanons:
Can be level-headed, but usually his anger gets the best of him.
His presence calms Al down a lot. His brother really loves him and missed Frank. Frank reminds Al of simpler times when they’d run errands for their old boss Torrio… now Al’s boss.
Represented by clover/clubs. The club symbol represents the summer season and the earth element. The club suit in cards indicates youth, a phase when a person focuses on education, and recklessness.
Frank has matching pins with Al, Jimmy, and Ralph, each brother taking a playing card suit. The brothers made them together with old scrap metal they found in the Navy yard.
Sticks his nose where it doesn’t belong. He likes putting himself in the middle of gossip circles. When he’s not purposefully antagonizing Napoleon to get a reaction, they get along really well because of this.
Wiggles his nose when he thinks hard
Tallest of the Capone brothers (6’1)
Broken out of the museum in search of the closest liquor store out of pure boredom. They tried to pay with greyscale $50s and promptly got kicked out.
A little bit of a sadist.
Gets very violent when he’s upset and enjoys it. Frank doesn’t usually feel bad about his previous actions
Frank: My furby died in my arms when I was a child
Ivan: I’m sorry to hear that..?
Frank, grinning and joking slightly: Don’t be. I’ve never felt more like a god.
He’d be on Booktok
Like his brothers, Frank will flirt with anyone. Unlike his brothers, Frank is mostly doing it to tease and have fun.
Sucker for hallmark movies
Jerma vibes
His ears turn red when he lies (credit to @frombottlealleytotheharbor for this one)
Frank’s Tommy is a replica whereas his Smith & Wesson Model 10 is from a photo/cutout. His Tommy doesn’t work at all, but his handgun can- he just doesn’t have any bullets.
The Model 10 is named Peggy and the Tommy is Doll
….. don’t call him Frankie unless your family.
Jimmy Consentini belongs to @all-yn-oween. I had to draw him and Frank together because (I think) they both have two-piece suits.
Plain clothes Napoleon is inspired by this and something I have scheduled.
2 weeks at uni and I’ve already reached peak procrastination. I found masking tape and somehow decided that the best use of my time was to make a tiny Belphemon-sleep.
These are all lovely post-canon fics, ranging from just after the hypothetical end of the series, to far off into Byler’s adulthood.
No particular order to be had sorry lol
(if I've mistagged anyone please let me know! I'm sure some of the writers on here that I haven't tagged have tumblrs but i don't know/remember them sorry)
The Tweets of Mr. & Mr Byers - by @mrhalloween2ficpage
The Paladin's Promise - by @starsarefire824
i'll be your first, i'll be your last - by agustplz (shout_out_lou)
dance with me while everybody's watching - by @itsromeowrites
It Takes Two - by Turning_tides
i'd rather lie (tell you i'm in love with you.) - by genevievive
you felt enough - by delusionaltogether (Whyyyyy)
friday (i'm in love) - by fizzseed
it's such a feeling, my love I can't hide - by @strangeswift
cheer up, baby - by @perexcri
Bring Your Roommate(?) to Work Day - by sarah_tonin_on_the_rocks
i just haven't learned to be human as you are yet - by adankrivervalleynearyou
let our walls cave in - by @andiwriteordie and @kidovna