#focus on that instead of the pain.
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People keep on asking for more Baby Robin and Papadile so here is more Baby Robin and Papadile. Now never ask anything from me ever again
#My art#One Piece#Long post#Sir Crocodile#Nico Robin#Alternatively panel 5 would've been a close up of Crocodile's face from Robin's POV where he looks like he's giving her a death glare#Not intentionally he's just a big scary bastard with a Resting Murder Face and Robin is a small traumatized child#But I wanted to focus on the silliness of the moment so you get the goofy version instead#IDK man there's just something very funny to me about the idea of Robin just randomly info-dumping about a subject she's read about#And Crocodile being like ''?????????????????????? The fuck you talking about??''#Robin leaves the ship's kitchen and Crocodile just stares at the tomato like ''...It's a fruit? Forreal?''#(Meanwhile Robin is sweating bullets like ''I called his favorite vegetable a FRUIT right in his FACE he's going to KILL ME'')#Robin grew extra feet from the bottom of her feet to reach the counter and that actually isn't me trying to explain bad art away#In the original Papadile comic there was a panel of Robin doing the dishes with extra feet to reach the sink but I cut it out#(It was a stress relief comic I did not feel like drawing a complicated background in detail) (BUT YES I THOUGHT OF IT)#Nico Robin Age 11 is *more* than capable of cooking Crocodile just does not trust her with his food. At least not yet#She did start doing the dishes unprompted and continues to do so (mostly out of fear). Croc told her she didn't have to but allows it#IDK a lot of people seem to headcanon Crocodile as incapable of cooking and like. Surely Mr ''I don't trust people'' knows how to cook#Like he doesn't have to be a master chef or anything but and maybe he enjoys not HAVING to cook (pain in the ass with one hand + knife/hook#But surely he can cook decent enough. SURELY#Botanists don't @ me I know the ''tomato is a fruit'' thing isn't fully accurate this is just a silly little haha comic
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constantly thinking abt this exhange on the plane in dofp
#like. the expressions!!!!!!#the little head tilt charles does when erik first apologises as if for a moment he's wondering why#and the way he backs up and dismisses it before he can go on bc he doesnt want to talk abt it. not again#like you can see the clear pain in his eyes and the way he seems to almost want to say something but stops himself#and decides to focus on the chessboard instead#and the look on erik's face when it hits him just how much charles suffered those years after cuba. but he doesnt pester him abt it#just ahhhhh !!! expressions !!!! acting#i hate these stupid gay people#marvel#x men#x men movies#x men dofp#dofp#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#cherik
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El being *12 hours earlier* than the Cali timeline when she arrives at Nina. Will saying ‘it’s been 9 hrs’ in the scene following his monologue in the van.
We know that at some point their timelines merged when they arrived to save her…
But we don’t know when exactly those alignments took place when they were still apart… which just makes you wonder…
#byler#something something#el’s not stupid#she heard everything at rink o mania which included mike deflecting about not calling Will#she heard Dustin say mike was being annoying about Joyce’s telemarketing job#she got her powers back roughly around the time the van scene was happening we can presume…#why would she not check on Mike and Will after finding out about the Hawkins gang?#she was literally with them last and it would make sense for her to want to know where they are/what they are doing#and since the timeline is off with el at Nina… just makes you wonder#the sad painful looks el makes during Mike’s monologue…#if she heard anything from that van scene..#whether it be mike saying it wasn’t fate/destiny and was just simple dumb luck…#if she heard Will emotionally play off deep feelings he harbors as el’s#even writing off his painting as being commissioned by her…#oh and the heart??#if she heard that and heard will encourage mike with it before telling her he loved her#no wonder she looked miserable#and left dude on read at the end instead to focus on max#both after his monologue and at the cabin 😙#this line from s2 is so insane in the context of this too…#bc if she saw them in the van and saw Will’s speech…#she also saw mike’s reaction which was blurred for us…#Joyce: he’s not doing well…#El: I know. I saw.#Joyce: what else did you see?#El: 👀#delusional but free
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I don’t know if I think season 4 is as good as 1 and 2 so far, but it’s such a relief to have a season where Mabel doesn’t have a one-off love interest.
Like, by the time we got to Tobert it felt so obvious that both him and his relationship to Mabel wasn’t going to last more than one season, and since he had so little to do with the events of season 3 otherwise I stopped seeing the point in caring about his character. Just like Alice in season 2, and almost Oscar in season 1 who was set up to last so much longer only to be completely written out in the start of season 2. It’s not like romance is everything (certainly not in a crime comedy show) but since Mabel’s love life has had so much screen time it got to the point where I felt the whole show got weaker because of its half-assed portrayal of it. «Either invest properly in a love interest, make them the killer again or just go at least a season without one» is what I thought when I started the new season. 5 episodes in it seems like they’re doing the third and I’ve got to say I’m relieved.
#am I annoyed that they keep underutilizing important early season characters#like Will Putnam and Theo Dimas?#oh yes#is there possibly a theobel biased part of me that wishes they explored that dynamic for more than one episode a season? possibly#but it’s also just so nice to get to focus on Mabel’s growing pains#and seeing more of how much Sazz and Charles meant to each other#instead of setting up a love interest that they don’t bother to keep for more than one season#only murders in the building#omitb#the potato rants#omitb spoilers#omitb meta#omitb discourse
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x oc stories tagged as x reader my enemy
#“ik they have a name and/or face claim but it’s still x reader bcs…” ill literally kill myself in front of u (/j)#i’m mad because i’m in pain but i’m choosing to focus the anger on this instead :)#ad0rechuu — rambles 😧
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Nagi calling Reo アホちん (aho-chin) is actually pretty cute. could’ve said just アホ (idiot), but added the ちん at the end 🥺 dummy
#nagireo#blue lock spoilers#episode nagi#epng 17#we lived through another chapter pals#but at what cost#seeing Nagi pouting in bed while thinking of Reo was the highlight for me tbh#i'm choosing to focus on that instead of the pain they're going through
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sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:
thing that I already do
thing I have tried 10 times
thing I already do
thing that I don't have the money to do
thing I already do
thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail
thing that is impossible given my situation
thing that doesn't apply to me
thing that I already do
thing I have already tried
hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently
thing I have already done
#I think maybe productivity tips help less if the reason you're unproductive is partially like.. physcial health and other extenral things#out of your control. rather than just like having trouble paying attention or spending too much time on tiktok or whatever#all the strategic to do lists in the world are not going to somehow prevent me from waking up with a debilitating migraine or whatever#or having external stressors or lacking resources and connections or other Productivity Essentials etc.#especially many tips involve stuff like 'cut off from social media' since thats the modern day time waster for so many poeple#and it's like.. lol.. i can hardly even maintain a blog even thuogh i actively WANT TO DO SO. 'shut off your smart phone!' already#done babey i fucking hate smart phones i shall never use an app unless i am forced to. 'delete tiktok' yep. already covered. tiktok and#all of those thinsg are my enemies. 'save money by cancelling some of your services' cool. already ahead of you.#who the fuck is out here paying for like 10 different subscription services. pirated videos uploaded to google drive and youtube to mp3#my beloved. etc. etc. and so on. 'socialize less' .........LOL.. if only you knew.. mr.writer of the article. i can barely muster#talking to friends more than once a month and even less if I'm actively sick (often occurence) etc. etc. ... hewoo#I think maybe instead of generic productivity tips I need more like.. how to refocus and be productive anyway even if you have a headache#or are nauseous or etc. Not that those are always things to ignore. and of course you should let your body rest and etc. But plenty of peop#e have mild physical symptoms and just work through them. Ithink something about the way my body/mind is SOO hyper attuned to all#sensory information just makes it like... constantly 'GRR well I cant focus on WRITING right now because my lef#t ear feels weird and my socks are too itchy and my back has a strange pressure and I'm vaguely warm and my eye feels some ssort of#way it doesnt normally feel and I'm hyperaware of my breathing and also nauseous for no reason' and like half of those things I#think '''normal''' people wouldnt even notice or at least would be able to just live through. but for me it's like.. nealry impossible to i#gnore and soooo distracting always. like 'wahh.. nooo we can't draw or get anything done.. my legs feel slightly heavy or something!!'#like............. ok......... who cares. thats not even a PAIN sensation it's just something weird. but it's just like.. NO. constant#mental alerts about the 'heaviness' of your legs be upon ye. Though Imean like.. yes.. 70% of the time I am in genuine pain#or having some sort of actual ailment with trackable physical symptoms. but sometimes it's just like... we could totally be working right#now and ignoring this silly thing but my brain is fixated on it for no reason uncontrollably. etc. etc. I guess it's the same way that like#most people can go to a grocery store without the whole experience being so overwhelming and so much stuff going on at once#that they have to rest afterwards but like.. in my own HOME doing NOTHING i feel like I should be able to not get overwhelmed lol. ANYWAY#Rolling my bastard little rock up a dumbass hill and so on and so forth
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You think I'm weak, don't you?
#i am very against the idea that the way wwx reacts to certain situations is because he chooses to ignore his pain and focus on others#i think while he does do that he is also somebody who is very optimistic#he chooses to not dwell on painful things and instead move forward#of course he hides his pain from others i know he does that but i think reducing him to just that feels wrong#he just knows he has to keep going and he chooses to do it with optimism and hopefulness#biggest example is him saying jc losing his core was the end of him but him losing it would be ok because he would find a way to live w it#in the book him losing control and being so shocked hits me so hard because he never gave up he just couldnt control it anymore#and i think even in the show him breaking down is heartbreaking because that is something he always chooses not to do#but when jyl dies that's it for him#i love him very much#this gifset changed so much while i was making it i hope it's good#wei wuxian#the untamed#the untamed edit#cql#cql edit#my gifs
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Digitalised + coloured + redesigned version of my Suiren and Vaatu sketch from two days ago, as promised!!
Coming up with Suiren’s design was a very long process of trying and failing because after you’ve drawn 9+ different versions of one character, the creativity starts to run a little dry, but I’m actually really proud of this one, she looks absolutely adorable <3
(Also yeah I did mostly just scribble Vaatu’s pattern because who has the energy to draw the all out accurately. Not me, that’s who, I’m chronically tired. People who draw him on the regular have my utmost respect. He’s still a funky little guy though :D)
Bonus, Raava incessantly screaming inside Suiren (and being completely ignored because Suiren is tired of her) while all this is happening:
#and yeah I did say I’d do a fuckass background but all my energy went to figuring out Suiren’s design#plus I suck at backgrounds so.. woe. LoK screenshot be upon ye#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#avatar suiren au#original character#sotrl suiren#vaatu#I don’t really know what to say in these tags lmao#usually I reach the tag limit really really easily but between my previous post and answering that ask I’ve ran out of things to say#someone please indulge me in this au I have Way Too Many Thoughts about it#hmm…#you know. I think people often make different avatar aus because they dislike Korra or think she’s a bad avatar#I don’t. I love Korra. I would kill and die for her#(says the red lotus stan. yes I’m well aware. no need to call me out)#and I think she’s a good avatar who was dealt a shitty hand both in universe and by the show’s production team#I’m making this au BECAUSE I love Korra. if Suiren is the avatar Korra gets to be a normal SWT girl#she’ll get to grow up with her parents. not isolated and degraded all the time for not being perfect. maybe she’d have a sibling or two#and Suiren gets spared her sotrl trauma too. win win for everyone!!#(I return Suiren gets the weight of the world on her shoulders lmao. but it’s fine. 1. she isn’t alone in it. she has her family#2. three quarters of the LoK threats are basically automatically eliminated for her. the RL are her parents. she fuses with Vaatu#and all she has to do to defeat Kuvira is to take her dress off 😁 /hj. basically. she’ll be okay. better than in sotrl at least)#also look. I love Suiren. she’s my dear child who’s been with me since I was 12. of course I wanna make her the main character in everything#and dark avatar Korra AUs have been done countless times before me. Kat’s doing one right now!! I just wanna do something that’s my own#and also I wanna focus less on pain and trauma for once and more on the sheer hilarity of the shenanigans that will occur post-fusion#cause this isn’t Adumbration where Korra lets Raava go and fuses with Vaatu instead. here Suiren’s got both of them at the same time#and they have 10000 years’ worth of grievances to air out. it’s like living with your divorced parents#trust me I would know. except mine aren’t divorced. they’re Worse and everyone wishes they’d just separate#anyway. that aside. Suiren’s not getting any sleep any time soon while those two duke it out
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I'm waiting for the day when all these people who praise Nesta for being mean and hurt other people's feeling and call it a ✨bad bitch✨ behaviour
To cry about how Nesta is out of the character for not actively being a "bitch" to her family for no reason :)
#waiting for the day her fans calls her out for not having a backbone#shattering their imagination of how they see Nesta and pretend to know her#when they say “Nesta is hated for no reason so why she's called a bitch?”#Nesta hated HATED herself for acting that way#she got stuck in a loop of pushing people away and it got out of her hands#she hated herself for the pains she caused#but her fans completely ignore that#instead they focus on her being nasty to her sisters and her mate#she was suicidal for how she treated Feyre#and they have the audacity saying she never verbally abused her#instead they focus on how IC handled her even though she never hated them for it#the way she was thankful to Feyre and Rhysand#they don't even want to acknowledge these#because then that would ruin her “bad bitch” aesthetic...#can't wait for all of it#nesta archeron#I'm sorry you have fans who don't understand you</3
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🐰💬
#sooo now when the surgery is 3 days away im starting to get very nervous nd anxious T-T#i know it's like a minor surgery nd i mean im gonna get to go home the same day so it's not supposed to be super bad#and the recovery time isnt supposed to be that long either. so like i know this is an easier surgery#im still sooooo scared nd nervous omg. i've never even broken a bone so this is like crazy for me sksksk#but i try to think positively#and i try to focus on the positive: many ppl say that they 'get their life back' after gallbladder surgery#so i can hopefully start feeling better and more normal again. nd regain my physical health#i miss going for long walks everyday. i miss being able to eat. i miss not being scared of the pain nd feeling uncomfortable everyday#so yeah.. trying to focus on that instead of being scared of the surgery itself. but i cant help it im just an anxious person#i just rlly wanna live normally again. i wanna go to the gym. i wanna eat well nd also yummy nd healthy. i wanna go for walks.#i wanna not be depressed anymore nd start writing again nd reading more nd watch shows nd be able to work on functioning as a normal person.
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stewy in argestes was having the time of his fucking liiiiife ‘they have a $75 cobb salad here dude you should buy that’ ‘like some of the women who went on those cruises’ ‘its funny cuz its true’ emotionally that man was on a white sand beach sipping a cocktail he is on vacation baby
#i mean yeah he’s masking the pain of being in a girlfight with kendall but he’s opting instead to focus on how everything is so funny#succession#stewy hosseini#m
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2024 year of charlie gets a fucking break (hopefully. maybe. tbd.)
#ctxt#i'm on medication that's reduced my post-hysterectomy pain by about 70%#i have an intake appointment with a physical therapist in march & a referral to start trigger point injections#to hopefully finally recover as completely as possible from the nightmarish neuropathy that's plagued me since uuuhhhh#going on 2 years ago. holy shit. genuinely can't believe i've been surviving & functioning as well as i have for this long#while suffering a disabling & extremely painful surgical complication. fuck my original surgeon for brushing me off during that time#but the new provider i'm working with is so responsive & thorough in her approach & seems genuinely committed#to helping me finally get relief after all this time. she listens to my feedback & is flexible in her approach#and her assistant is a great communicator who's been handling most of the logistics of care coordination for me#and what a huge fucking relief that is. to not have to drag my doctors kicking & screaming towards maybe treating me eventually#i wanna cry. i finally feel like i'm being taken seriously and cared for. and i'm not BETTER yet (might never be the same as i was pre-op)#but i actually feel optimistic for the first time in over a year that i won't just have to deal with this agonizing pain on my own forever#i might actually see enough improvement that i can start to get back to living my life instead of just surviving it#money is tighter than it's been since i got laid off during early pandemic and that's stressing me out#but i promised myself that i would put my health first in 2024 and that means only working the bare minimum needed to pay my bills for now#genuinely i so fucking needed a break. i felt like i was trying to swim through a meat grinder last year#and it wasn't until i ended up in the ER about it that i finally was able to take my own pain seriously enough#to put my foot down & make some necessary changes that are now letting me focus on Getting Well With Myself at last#in hindsight it's like. really freaking me out how thoroughly i was able to compartmentalize & dissociate from how miserable i was#bc nobody who had the ability to help me would take me seriously & my shitty boss was like. extremely textbook emotionally abusive#and on one hand that was a survival mechanism that kept me on my feet during one of the worst times of my life. so props to myself there#but it was also very maladaptive how long & unnecessarily it went on before i snapped out of it & escalated things for my own safety#it was the same helpless frustration i often felt as a kid of like 'well nobody is on my side but me so i gotta suck it up & help myself'#and i think the family trauma shit that was going on last year definitely contributed to that. idk sense of doubling across time?#and things had to get Extremely Bad before they were bad enough for me to realize that although i felt like it#i am no longer an isolated & parentified island of a child who is beholden to the whims of ignorant & indifferent adults#i actually can and should take action to advocate for myself bc i am an adult and i CAN now change my circumstances as needed#instead of just enduring them as if i'm stuck there with no agency or chance to change things#and i have a really solid support system who helped me feel like it was possible to stand up for myself to get the help i desperately need#chronic blogging
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honestly. being able to be honest with my loved ones about when i am Mentally Unwell but also Dont Want To Talk About It has done wonders for my mental health
#its nice just being able to tell people “im not okay! please dont focus too much on me tho!” and have them respect it#instead of doing things that will trigger me bc they are uncomfortable w the fact that im not okay#i deeply appreciate others sitting in their discomfort/holding the discomfort with me instead of comforting me#and like i get that ppl who offer space or time or comforts are trying to care for me but tbh its not welcome most of the time#bc when I'm upset often times it triggers deep emotional pain that only i can really manage by taking time to sit and calm down and Feel#(bc if not it becomes a flashback instead of Feelings from being Triggered) and having my attention diverted is actually distressing for me#bc i have to be grounded in very specific ways also that i just dont usually have the energy to explain bc like... i know how to do it?#and like also. i can just be Not okay. it doesnt have to be a Thing for me to acknowledge it#iderk what the point of this tag ramble is#im just like. really glad ive found people who understand that im not Avoidant just bc i have different needs bc of how my nervous system i#also if its not clear: please do not offer comforts for this. i am handling my own feelings and issues i just kinda wanna talk about it#also reminding myself its okay to not want to be comforted and that doesnt mean im Wrong or Bad or Resistant or Harming myself#(also ngl having a therapist who understands that certain coping skills may never go away but can be modified to be more useful is LIFE#CHANGING. DO YOU KNOW HOW FREEING IT WAS TO HEAR SOMEONE WHO ISNT CRAZY SAY “i can see how [these things] can be distressing and if you wan#to stop doing them we can explore new coping skills - AND if the distress from these coping skills is shame related we can work through it#and see what happens and its okay if you come out the other side using the same coping skills with a better understanding of yourself “#when most of my life every coping skill ive ever engaged in has been moralized (esp by therapists) and attempted to be beaten out of me.)#also I'm saying “comfort me” thru this bc even tho it's not actually comforting TO me when ppl do this ik thats usually their intent
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Thinking about "I know my pain is such an imposition" and "How long could we be a sad song?" in relation to the bigger picture of how society sees mental health challenges, and like as part of that, how I dealt with my own in my 20s again.
#taylor swift#about me#'how much sad did you think I had in me?' also plays part of this conversation but yeah the dichotomy of the two lines and how#everybody wants a relatable (which unfortunately in this day and age often equates with sad/mentally ill) success story to look up to#while not wanting or otherwise negating the impact that comes from that person not being able to move past that is ... interesting#to say the least and I think if I had one piece of advice for my 20 year old self it'd be to not focus on the sad of it and build a new#story for myself because I feel like even in the moments where I tried to move on but felt I couldn't that was my narrative so I#leaned so far into it by predominately leaning into media like that to feel seen to the point I brewed in it and elongated its impact ngl#like I wonder if I would have reached where I am now if I did not try to be a success story where the pain was part of who I am and#instead of wearing it like a tattoo on my sleeve I simply rejected it and created something else. anyway I'm ranting now but yeah like#conversations about celebrities going through similar + being healed enough to not need therapy now has had me pondering ngl
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There are times when Kaeya does deliberately do or say things to genuinely aggravate someone he is sleeping with, all with the very intention of having them really put him through the ringer, particularly when he’s extremely upset about something or the ache in his body is beyond a tolerable level and he desperately wants something to distract him from it
#//Less than pleasant hc time; he we go#hc; kaeya#//In the latter case; it is v counter-productive#//Bc afterward he has to deal with the chronic pain AND then the sex injuries they’d inflicted upon him#//But in the moment; he’d be happy to get knocked around just to focus on the pain from that instead#//He rlly does try to avoid this with genuine partners of his; bc they don’t deserve to be taunted into hurting him like this#//Esp if they are the type to feel guilty abt it; to blame themself for the aftermath; even if he was the sole cause#//But there are times the bad habit rears its head; even with his best efforts to avoid it#//His acting flirty one moment then almost ornery and spiteful with the same inflection is a decent sign at it#//Its intent to stir up trouble; while making the person more & more aggravated & keeping an innocent front himself#//Goading them into being the angrier party; into acting rashly and lashing out in ways he KNOWS will hurt him#//Theres meaner things like taunting how good they are/that he’s feeling bored. Also mentioning sb else’s name during & doubling down if it#got him a particularly angry reaction he’d been ACHING to provoke out of them. And so much more. He’s terribly creative when this desperate#//Again; its not usually smth that usually happens with definite partners; he tries to internalize things more for them#//But yeah; sometimes things w contacts of his get Messy at the flip of his mood. & he RLLY ends up paying the price for it#//Emotionally; he tends to feel absolutely awful in the end; mired with guilt & esp the Drop from all the adrenaline spent before#//Physically; he does feel more relaxed—running so high on adrenaline among other things that. But then there’s also PAIN#//¬ the good comforting or pleasurable kind; just PAIN he’ll be tentative to even get treated at the church bc theyll ask Questions#//These provocations tend to actually be a secondary resort—he tends to ASK ppl to knock him around on purpose/no restraint beforehand#//If they cooperate; he’ll keep encouraging to the point of injury and then some; let them get too caught up to realize til too late#//If not; THEN he breaks out all this to provoke them into hurting him anyways#self harm mention tw#//Bc this is a v destructive behavior of his#//It is no longer such a worry if he and his partner have ample trust and communication tho#//Bc with sb like that; he can actually work through shit much more healthily#//And if they are still down to knock him around for physical needs fulfillment; rather than use grounding pressure or smth#//At least he will be much safer in their hands than in that of sb who doesn’t have his wellbeing at the forefront of their mind
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