#foaming at the mouth just thinking about it come ON
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thinking about how the first time peter sees rose again is most likely also the first time he’s heard his real name in months, and how rose subsequently spends the rest of the season reminding him of his humanity and who he really is, only for peter to throw away his career and convictions without hesitation in exchange for her safety
thinking about how rose struggled with ptsd and worked so hard to get back to a good place mentally, yet she jumped headfirst into danger as soon as she heard that peter was in trouble and put her career and safety at risk to help him because she knew he needed her, only to realize in the end that the life she wanted was incompatible with the path peter had chosen
thinking about how, even after 10 months apart with no contact, they both immediately fell back into their old patterns with rose watching the surveillance feed while peter slept, and peter picking up dinner, and rose having a dangerous and not-entirely-legal plan that peter had no choice but to go along with, and the banter and the joking, and the way they worked so well together and supported and protected each other
as much as i loved their immediate connection in season 1, the angst and tension in their relationship in season 2 was just immaculate – it’s about the yearning and the understanding and the hurt and the mutual sacrifice and the fact that they’re better together and they want to be together but can’t for reasons outside of their control
it’s the fact that peter is aware of how much better his life is with rose in it, both personally and professionally, and his absolute certainty that he can protect her even as much as it worries him to know that she’s in danger
it’s the fact that peter comes to the realization this season that he himself is the cause of that danger, that she will never be safe as long as she’s associated with him, that just because he can protect her doesn’t mean that she wants to live the kind of life where she constantly needs protection
it’s the fact that things are different this time around, because she’s more than just a witness he needs to protect, because he knows her now, because he cares about her, because he will never be able to live with himself if something happens to her
it’s the fact that peter gave up his life for hers, he became a traitor in exchange for her safety, and he'll take that secret to the grave so she can move on with her life and forget about him
it’s the fact that rose sees peter slowly losing himself to desperation and suspicion, falling further and further into that dark place she herself once inhabited, so she chooses to stay with him, to support him and protect him in her own way, to make sure he never forgets who he really is
it’s the fact that rose has never felt more like her old self than when she’s working the case with peter, and she feels more alive than she has in a long time that night after the party, until she sees the worry and panic on peter’s face when he realizes she didn’t keep her promise
it’s the fact that she understands the guilt he feels from each loss, and the fact that she could never put him in a position where he might have to mourn her too
it’s the fact rose likes peter, likes the two of them together, but she doesn’t know how they could ever have a normal life together, but she could never forget about him either
it’s the fact that they both sacrificed so much for the other but it still wasn’t enough to keep them together in the end
i am foaming at the mouth, i am rattling the bars of my enclosure, i am impatiently waiting for season 3
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i can't get over how mc is Caleb's everything and he's so dependent on her and so afraid to lose her and is so scared she'll never want him anymore and throw him out so he's left alone but it's not like that in the slightest, like mc wants him and NEEDS him just as much as he wants and NEEDS her, the myth proves it!! the story proves it, NOTHING will ever make her turn away from him, no matter what he does to her!! i can't wait till more of his cards come out so we can learn more abt them and see their relationship develop
exactly it makes me feel like a wet dog shaking in the cold when i think about it. he can be so self-depricating when it comes to her in such a specific and punishing way and yet the myth just outright reveals how deeply important they are to each other. like mc is so vulnerable with caleb. and i honestly think if caleb saw how mc acted with other people and esp other guys like it might actually dawn on him but that wont happen bc the storylines are seperated etc etc but . GODDDD
i literally will crumble and foam at the mouth when we get a caleb horny card u just know it will be INSANEEEEE
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no because he actually doesn't understand how much we are actually all begging for older jim kirk
#foaming at the mouth just thinking about it come ON#i'm begging on my knees#star trek#Chris pine#jim kirk#james t kirk#star trek 4#aos
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Red and Green
Gil is glowering. He's been glowering almost since they arrived. He's happy to help, of course. Jack is in the winter play, and since Sersi is also teaching at his school, they've all come to help out with last minute decorating and such. He's baked five sheet pans worth of goodies for the bake sale taking place before and after the play.
Thena is on stage, helping Jack and a few other kids with putting fake snow everywhere. She's not exactly taking part but she's good at keeping them from throwing it on each other or anywhere unnecessary.
That's not the problem. The teacher talking to her is the problem.
Gil doesn't know who he is. Ben says he thinks he's the gym teacher or something. Seems a little young--aren't gym teachers always old dudes who don't actually play sports? This guy is their age, visibly handsome, even from a distance.
"You're a natural with them," the tall, blonde stranger insists.
Thena shakes her head, "I couldn't disagree more. I am here for Jack and no one else. The little hellions can fend for themselves."
She says, and then still decisively stops two boys close to the stairs from seeing what the fake snow tastes like.
"Well, I think you're a natural." Who does this guy think he is? He was moving some larger stuff around with Ikaris all afternoon. Apparently until Thena caught his eye and lured him away.
Gil rolls his eyes as Mister Blondie pulls off the fleece he's been wearing. His t-shirt gets pulled up a little with it, just enough for the stage lighting to really emphasize the full, washboard eight pack of abs he's got.
Phastos clears his throat loudly in Ben's ear. "Ahe-hem, Mister Stoss."
"Habibi, please," Ben attempts to lean away from his husband. "It is not a sin to have eyes, my love."
Gil sneers to himself. Thena has eyes. And while she wasn't openly admiring like Ben had - no matter how briefly - he knows she's seen them. He just...knows it.
"Gil?" Ikaris walks over to him, tugging at his own t-shirt now that boxes are moved or sets are arranged, or whatever they've been doing. "Wanna give us a hand?"
"Who is that guy?" Gil points blatantly at the man still chatting Thena up while she's trying to keep an eye on Jack and his friends.
Ikaris looks and shrugs. "Teacher."
Gil shakes his head at him. If Ikaris weren't both Thena's brother and Sersi's husband, sometimes he really wonders how they would have become friends. "Thanks, helpful--I meant how did he and Thena get to talking. She doesn't usually talk...with people."
It's not his most subtle tactic. But Ikaris doesn't seem to pick up on his greenish aura. "I heard him ask her a little about what she used to play. Guess they're talkin' about college sports?"
Gil's discomfort only increases, though. Thena did play sports when they were younger. He didn't. And he knows that she misses how she used to play soccer in high school and even in the first year of college.
His eyes are glued to them as Thena smiles and even laughs faintly as she talks to Whats-His-Face.
"What?" Ikaris asks him outright (no tact at all).
Gil huffs, deciding he's done just watching things unfold. "I don't think you'd like it if he was chatting up your wife."
Ikaris makes a face. "I guess not. But he's not. And Thena's not your wife."
Gil doesn't have a defense to that. He storms off so Ikaris can't announce to all the auditorium volunteers how flushed he is. Instead, he hurries up the little stairs onto the stage. "Uh, hey."
Thena stops dead in her conversation to smile at him, "hey."
He has to give it to him, if Mister Golden is bothered at all by the interruption, he doesn't let it show. "Hey, thanks again for helping out. The school doesn't have much to offer for things like these. Volunteering really goes a long way for the kids."
Gil tries not to scoff at Mister Perfect's magnanimous speech. He offers a stiff smile and hovers closer to Thena. "Yeah--I need Thena's help with the bake sale stuff, if you'll excuse us."
Thena lets him grasp her hand and all but pull her away. She only lingers enough to point over her shoulder, "Jack is in charge."
The other kids whine, but he's still riding the high of having all his 'cool' aunts and uncles help.
"Oh," Mister Friendly laughs faintly with a bright smile (and perfect teeth). "Well, it's already snowing out. You should stay warm inside."
Gil bristles as Mister Flirtatious' hand comes dangerously close to touching Thena's shoulder. He pulls her closer to him.
"I can give you a hand," he offers.
Gil is now borderline tugging Thena with him. "Thanks, but I need to, uh, ask her opinion on some things."
He wants to get right in the guy's face and tell him that of course he knows it's already snowing. He's not going to let Thena get cold! He rushes off the stage with her and makes sure to grab her coat off the back of one of the chairs. Maybe it's a bit obvious, but he loudly shakes it out and holds it up for her to slide her arms into the sleeves.
Mister Sunshine just smiles and waves before going back to watching the kids.
Gil sniffs. "He's friendly."
"Quite." It doesn't tell him what he wants it to. Usually Thena isn't warm to people just coming up and talking to her.
"What were you guys talking about?" he asks, realizing it's too late for him to be asking in a fake-casual way. He shoves his hands in his pockets as they walk out of the auditorium and head outside.
"He introduced himself as the physical education teacher," she states factually, which at least isn't the smitten fondness he was dreading hearing from her after their interaction. "He told me Jack is doing exceedingly well in his activities."
Of course that was his in; Thena is a sucker for talking about Jack, in any way, shape or form.
"Phastos is insistent Jack learn American football, but my practices with him have been paying off," she states with her nose all the way in the air with pride.
Gil laughs. Thena is determined to get Jack so hooked on it that he calls it football instead of the American 'soccer'. "It is a little less physical than football."
They get outside and Gil shoves his hands deeper in his pockets. Maybe it was dumb for him to get Thena's coat for her and not go looking for his own.
"Gil, aren't you cold?" she asks outright.
"It's okay, I just need a hand with a few of the trays," he excuses with a smile, unlocking his car from where they stand.
"What did you need my opinion on?"
Oh, right, the blatant and bold faced lie he told in order to soothe his own jealousy. What was he thinking? Ikaris was right, Thena isn't his wife--she's not even his girlfriend. But that never really bothered him so much as when he saw Mister Model up there chatting her up...showing off his abs to her.
"Gil?"
"Uh, well," he hesitates to get out as they step out from the school doors' cover and into the light evening snow. "I guess...do you think what I made will sell well?"
It's lame--it's super lame, and embarrassing. It's a bit late, isn't it? He's made a full dozen of five different desserts. Wouldn't he have asked this before he got so far into the process? And she and Jack were there when he baked them at Ben and Phastos'!
"Of course they will," she answers honestly, though. He likes the blunt and earnest realism on her more than Ikaris. "Your baking is always amazing. I'm sure the school will make back the cost of the play and then some."
"If they make the 'then some' I think I should get to keep the profit," he mutters. Thena laughs at his joke, but butter is expensive, and he's made three dozen different shortbreads! "Here."
He hands Thena a tray of the frosted cookies, which have to be separate from the rest to keep their design integrity pristine. He carries the other three trays himself and closes his trunk.
"It's nice that Jack is excited about it."
Gil smiles, some of his earlier agitation melting away. Thena, for all her insistence that she didn't like anything to do with children, lives for Jack. She loves coming to his school events, helping with parent stuff. He knows she's lied at her job so she can attend every single soccer game he has, even when they're at 4 in the afternoon on a tuesday.
"I didn't expect him to be so happy to have all of us here."
"Well sure," Gil chuckles, breathing a little easier now that it's just them. "Jack thinks you're the coolest aunt in the world. He's bragging to his friends right now about how you were a pro soccer player and know how to use swords."
Thena rolls her eyes modestly. "I keep telling him it's an amateur fencing class."
Calling it amateur is a disservice; Gil has witnessed a little of it giving her a ride once, and she dominates in it.
"I hope he never gets tired of having us around for things like this," she admits to him quietly, maybe even sheepishly. "Even when he's a teenager."
Gil smiles even wider, because Thena is just so sweet and loving under her calm and placid exterior. "I'm sure he won't. At least not you--maybe Uncle Ikaris."
Thena laughs, and it shows off her teeth in a cute way.
Gil shifts his load to open the door for her. He really didn't need help with anything, but he doesn't need to confront what it means that he was so desperate to get her out here with him just yet.
"There you two are, people are starting to arrive!"
"Sorry, just had to keep 'em nice and cold y'know," Gil murmurs as Sersi rushes forward to take Thena's tray for her. He sighs but Ikaris has some decency and extends his hands. Gil lets him take the top tray from him. "Are you sure I'm supposed to have this much real estate?"
Sersi waves a hand. "I've run this bake sale the last three years. I am not exaggerating when I tell you two parents at most will actually bring enough. Everyone else just brings a store bought cookie platter and lets it suffice. They don't sell well and they just take it home with them after the play."
"Gil will put them all to shame."
He blushes at the confidence Thena has in him. "If it's to help the kids put this play on again next year, then fine."
Ben has his phone out, snapping pictures. "They're gonna knock people's socks off, Gil."
"Thanks guys," he sighs as he unwraps his trays upon trays.
"They certainly look great!"
Gil's blood pressure spikes again. He turns and someone has let the golden retriever with a whistle around his neck out of the auditorium. "Thanks."
"Jack's been bragging about how his uncle is the best cook on the planet. I hope I can snag one for myself before the play!"
He's just being friendly, but Gil can feel his veins tightening under his skin with every word out of this guy's mouth. He looks at Ben, who's all excited and bouncing with his phone up. "What?"
Ben points.
Gil looks up, as does Thena. There's a pretty half-assed sprig of mistletoe hanging from the decorative archway put up over the table. He looks around; none of the other ones have this. He's ready to tell Ben to stop messing around. But then the presence of Mister Smiley and the memory of him flirting with Thena resurfaces in Gil's mind.
Thena's eyes go wide but she doesn't move as he pulls her closer. He slides his hand up her cheek, letting his palm angle and hide where their faces make contact, and not too briefly. Her eyes flutter closed.
Everyone's jaws drop (except Ben's).
Gil pulls away. He's kissed her close enough to her mouth that it will look the part, but not actually on her lips. But far away from her cheek that it can't be misconstrued from her view. He smiles as her eyes open again and she blinks at him.
He's never seen Thena blush before.
"You know I wouldn't kiss you without asking," he whispers before pulling himself away from her. "But, uh, come find me after the play is done?"
"H-Hm," she squeaks out, taking a few stiff steps away, her heels clicking like a fawn's hooves as it learns to walk.
Gil goes back to setting up his bake sale spread, some renewed vigour swirling in his chest. He peeks up from the table. Mister Perky seems to have gotten the hint and has started directing parents with trays to take the other (smaller) tables. Gil is satisfied.
Ben loudly snaps a picture, practically giggling. "Habibti, you're as red as the tinsel."
"Stop it! And delete that!"
Gil chuckles to himself as Thena rushes back into the auditorium and away from the commotion he's just caused. He does hope she comes find him after, and not just because he's her ride home.
Ikaris gives him a strange look but Sersi rushes him inside too. She leans back into Gil's view to give him an enthusiastic thumbs up. He blushes, but if Sersi thinks it was the right move then maybe he's onto something.
Gil takes a seat, ready to start selling. He has to admit that maybe he owes it to Mister Chatty to save him a brownie or something. But only if he gets to kiss Thena again later.
#Thenamesh AU#happy winter everyone!!!#I hope you're all taking some time to relax and be kind to yourselves#for those still reading thank you for all your continued to support#it still makes me happy to write Thenamesh so...I'm gonna keep doing it#Gil gets positively foaming at the mouth jealous#watching this tall blonde and handsome stranger chat up HIS Thena#Ikaris is thick as a brick being like I don't get it she's not his girlfriend#Sersi: how did we ever get married?#Ben noticed right away that Mister Golden Retriever was interested in Thena#and also noticed that the second he was close enough to speak with her Gil forgot what he was doing immediately#we see protective Gil plenty#but this is well and truly jealous#Thean thinks nothing of it#also she doesn't care about abs#she's more about arms iykyk#Gil sells out before the play even starts everything looks so good#he sneaks into the theatre just in time for the play to start#he tries to get a peek at Thena but she's at the other end of all their friends and it's dark#really she's just feeling shy#but she does sneak out the second the play is done to come and find him#she asks him how things sold#because she's nervous#he gets right to business and asks if he can kiss her for real this time#without all their friends watching and taking pitcures#not that he doesn't ask Ben to send him the pictures from before anyway#they kiss for so long that eventually their friends come find them again anyway#Jack is confused what the big deal is because he has always thought Uncle Gil and Aunt Thena were married#Ben: actually they're not sweetie#Jack: they're kissing obviously they are
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"But why would Sonic still be friends with them why wouldn’t he denounce them or treat them like the villains they are? Why won't he realize they're just evil?"
First of all, has it perhaps occured to you that Sonic loves/cares for them no matter what they do and doesn't want to hurt them if he doesn't have to? Has it perhaps occurred to you that he doesn't see them like irredeemable villains and it's not because he's a dumb dumb idiot?
Second of all, haha keep talking and I'm gonna unroll my character analysis essay. "They're just evil" yeah that's rich. Bet you thought the ending of the series was about "redeeming" them too, huh?
#sondread#sonine#sonic prime#sonic the hedgehog#knuckles the dread#nine the fox#I'm gonna be a prime sonic defender forever at this rate#Anyways I channeled the me from between seasons 2 and 3 who was frustrated at seeing the stuff people were saying about my favs#Prime Sonic somehow seems to compel people to start foam at the mouth as they call him stupid and deride him for being hopeful and seeing#the good and people#and then somehow the people who are willing to be okay about Prime Sonic's tendency to try to save everyone and towards self sacrifice#can only believe it as long as sonic stupidly and naively believes his beloved friends are good people as these 'friends' so skillfully#manipulate him#Then when Sonic sees them at their worst canonically those people start foaming at the mouth when he doesn't instantly denounce or try to#imprison/kill these characters#It makes me less frustrated when it comes to Dread because I can get what people are seeing and unfortunately whatever talk transpired#between Sonic leaving the yoke in s3 and everyone else coming to fight Nine happened offscreen#You do have to dig at least slightly beyond surface level interpretation to get the reading that Dread is more than just an evil guy who was#pretending to not be#(although I would have thought how he originally tried to save his crew from experiencing him at his worst by keeping himself away from his#obsession would mean something but I digress)#With Nine to believe that he's always just been evil and manipulative to Sonic so he could backstab him you quite literally have to ignore#everything we see across the whole series and the feelings that come through in the final episodes of seasons 2 and 3#and ONLY believe that what Renegade and Shadow say about Nine (and the chaos council in s3) is canon#And yes I do think that if you thought S3 was about redeeming certain characters so the ending could be happy go lucky then you are missing#the point of what Sonic Prime tried to say and of Sonic’s own philosophy#I daresay you missed the point of some of these characters as well if you think their arcs are about how they end with them redeeming#themselves so they can become good people and therefore deserve life and a home#fandom wank#i just be ramblin
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chat is this real 🙁
#my art#adventure time fionna and cake spoilers#adventure time spoilers#petrigrof#wow#i think ive said the word wow out loud like 10 times in the past 20 minutes because im still fucking reeling in sheer disbelief#like. obvi im pulling a ep9&10 (as in i am oversimplifying nuanced and complicated thoughts) but wow#in the big picture it wasnt even like. Horrible it was just badly mediocre#how does a tv14 cartoon get even more dumbed down and babytalk than a y7 one#i was really really worried about this like. like only a few days into waiting for the finale i was less nervous like foaming at the mouth k#inda excited nd more scared they were just gonna. abandon it. nd they did#nd this is such a pattern that i hope there isnt a season two#and something in me almost hopes that this is like. the end because i dont know how they could come back from this or give any more closure#if the biggest idea (or one of) of at is that everything changes i think the other is everything ends and ive felt this since atdl ep 4 but#theyre drinking from a dry creek atp#i hope people continue to love this show as the beautiful complicated thing it is and pretend that that didnt exist#what didnt exist#where am i#(in the same tone of voice as ice king from the beyond the grotto ep)#ill still be drawing at stuff tho i still love it beyond words#tumblr needs to let me add paragraph breaks in tags jfc if i was me reading this i would literally not even read it
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"KAGEHINA clips for edits" youtube video and you DON'T include season 1 episode 4 "nobody was there/i'm here" ???????? disliked unsubbed reported blocked on twitter ip banned WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU MADE A KAGEHINA CLIPS VIDEO AND DID NOT INCLUDE S1 EP4 ARE YOU INSANE??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#all the clips are just them talking to each other or standing next to each other#I WISH I WAS KIDDING#literally not One freak quick attack im going to paint your entire bedroom neon orange and install brightness forever lights in your ceilin#i NEEEEED more people to start being crazy about s1 ep4 THAT EPISODE WAS CRAZY#also i need the jackals/adler's match to be animated#like i think i need that more than anything#that way it doesn't fucking matter what clips get thrown into a compilation that entire match was a kagehina compilation#“somebody even better will come find you” 30000 CASUALTIES#every time i open up haikyuu manga volume 44 and 45 i start foaming at the mouth screaming and crying WHYA RE THEY LIKE THAT#i hate kageyama and hinata they are the worst hcaracters ever i hate them i hate them and their stupid gay ass relationship i hate them#volleyball guys#also like no hate whatsoever to the person who uploaded the original compilation vid i literally do not care#i just forgot to move the clips from my old laptop onto my new one and now i want to edit but i can'tttttt because i don't have the clipsss
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I am staring DIRECTLY at Film Reroll Luke Skywalker watching and anticipating his next move
#film reroll#the film reroll#Tim Nolan you played him so well!!!!#I don’t think this will happen but this version of Luke is one I can kinda see turning to the dark side??#like think about it. your aunt and uncle are killed. Ben Kenobi tells you it’ll be alright though and that you have the force in you#you can come with him and train to be a Jedi just like your father was#you leave planet and on the way have to put up with this asshole smuggler and even free a serial killer just to get to the rebels#but it’s fine! because once you’re with the rebels you’ll then be able to train with Ben like he’s promised#except you get there and there are two other Jedi candidates. each seemingly better options than you#one is a child who already has pretty good control of the force without anyone telling her how to wield it.#she’s also young and thus full of so much more potential than you#and the other is a woman older than you. but she has so much more life experience. she’s proven herself worthy both to the rebels#and to the force itself. she is strong and basically everything you’re not#but that’s alright too because Ben knows you. of course he’s going to pick to train you!! but then they say your name Skywalker with horror#and you are told about who your father is and how if you are trained and given everything you want you will become just like him#you are evil and violent by nature even though you feel as if you are anything but… except maybe they’re right#because when confronted with this fact your first instinct was to attack an injured man on death’s door#and if Kenobi has his time taken up by training either kahki or Jyn/planning the destruction of the Death Star#Luke is potentially left in a very vulnerable state to stew#I just am foaming at the mouth thinking about it!!!!#(I do feel like Andy will ultimately take Luke in a more redemption/I am not my father by ‘righteous’ sacrifice’ route though#which also has a lot of potential to be delicious)
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im foaming at the mouth ur tags oh my god. i need to read the letters and then pass out maybe
^me after reading all 80 something pages of letters plus folder 2… godspeed i wish you the best and i absolutely think you should.
i wasn’t gonna put him on blast like this because he’s not here to defend himself so i put it under a cut but this is possibly the funniest description my friend could ever have used and when i finally read the letters i did have to sit down and go damn. he was right.
#me 🤝 you 🤝 foaming at the mouth!!!! except mine is also a little bit 💕🦋🫧🥰🥺 because you liked my tags akdhskdjaks. so thank you 💕💕💕💕 anyway#PLEASE DOOOOO AND THEN COME TALK TO MEEEEEE i have rec’d them to everyone i know. come talk to me about this epistolary romance#i need to listen to the podcast so bad so i have more historical context (the last article i mentioned was really sad but good for that)#except for the fact that i think i might start climbing up walls and chewing up insulation#line!! after!!! line!!!!#liv in the replies#i am really feeling the read mores tonight 😇 no idk why either but we’re doing it#also re: the texts please bear in mind i don’t think this man knows what omegaverse is he just. chose those words in that order on his own.#love him to death. my favorite local defenseman#swifty-fox
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Basira and Georgie have an interesting parallel in season 4 as the "partners" to people in metaphorical addiction recovery
Specifically they both get to be involved once their person has already been through the hardest part (often involving Jon purposefully putting himself in harms way) and then afterwards want to believe that it happened because the person wanted to be better and then Was Better through sheer force of will
Georgie's involvement with Melanie is less clear but based on her later conversation with Martin she doesn't seem to be aware of Melanie's more violent actions or the fact that Melanie was only able to get where she was through the actions of other people in a similar position.
And I think with the powers as a partial addiction metaphor this fits very neatly with the narrative that you just need to Want to get better and people who fall through the cracks simply didnt
Daisy and Melanie's recovery arcs were reliant on the support of others, but in various scenes people who care for them use them as examples of the Good Addict or the Good, Redeemed Person to tell Jon, another person still in the giant hole in the ground, that he just needs to be Better to deserve a place in their lives. And while Basira and Georgie are allowed to create spaces where they and the ones they care about are secure, they do it by drawing a stark line between people who were strong enough to escape and people who weren't
it makes them feel more secure in both their esteem of the person they care about and their belief that if this other person, Jon, hasn't made the choice to escape it's by simple lack of will
but daisy was forcefully separated from the hunt by the coffin and then dragged to the surface by Jon (using the Eye). melanie was sedated and cut into against her will (with the help of the Eye). their "getting better" was not a matter of personal will from the start and couldn't get started until other people intervened in ways that are extremely uncomfortable and traumatic
and it's much easier to look at an addict or a mentally ill person and say "see? they got better because they tried"
#tma#the magnus archives#im saying this as someone who thinks georgie is a better character for it!#she literally admits later that she just didnt want to look at what was going on because it was easier for her!#i also just. get the feeling that melanie didnt tell georgie Everything#the way georgie talks about melanies recovery just doesnt point to an understanding of melanies road to escaping#and with the relative newness of their relationship i cant see melanie letting it all out#when all she wants is to get on with her life with a person who hasnt had the chance to rob her of agency and safety#listen when the convo comes up with georgie and martin i foam at the mouth
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Haven’t been sleeping well because, and this is the stupidest reason, I’m so full of damnable longing. All I do is yearn and pine and want.
#I hate it!#I just want to fall in love!#not long distance. not through an app. I want to meet someone and be awkward and flirt and be messy and work for it.#I’m 35 now and I feel like I’m too old for that#which yeah I know sounds ridiculous. life goes on. I’ve got time. blah blah blah.#but I do wish I’d done the standard meeting and falling for someone in school and marrying young and having kids#all that milquetoast basic stuff#BUT IT’S NOT BASIC! I want that! I want that security and young love that just grows and grows!#can you imagine building that kind of connection with someone?#I know there’s plenty of valid criticisms towards marrying your high school sweetheart but come on… lemme dream a little#I don’t want to fill out applications online and trawl dating sites for someone!#I want the friends to awkward more than friends to maybe more to yes! please why did we wait I know you. I’ve known you. I accept you.#I want someone to know me and want me for who I am#aaaaaaaaaa I’m fucking foaming at the mouth#I can’t stop thinking about it and it makes my chest ache so much#and I feel like I’m too old for that! I have no social life! I’m not in school around other people! how could this even happen for me?#stupid!#😮💨… okay… calm down Ian… it’s cool. we’re cool.#I don’t want to sleep. I just want to lay in bed and imagine being in love all night.#gross. gross gross gross.#you can ignore this#goodbye forever#text
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please know anytime i get an ask like this im EATING IT UP even if my thoughts are messy and all over the place. would take some while to make up something fully cohesive and of quality so yknow i hope even my on the spot ideas are interesting to you all :D
#though i feel like i should re read some canon stuff again#getting the feeling im getting out of touch a little bit....#i will soon since im no longer stressing about irl stuff rn#but ill see if i get to it#ive been having severe motivation issues - and even if tt is still my main hyperfix#if my brain wants to play different games or talk about other stuff#i WILL do that instead .if i force myself to toontown i will burn myself out even more. but believe me i still go autism on the wiki n such#just no motivation to play.... i still feel bad for being a big disengaged with the og media but#then again i played toontown and ONLY toontown DAILY for several months straight i think its valid i need to chill a bit#and only use the info i got on my mind#still feel bad for not pulling out saved dialogue or ingo or go re read the wiki or cogs ink i could be more accurate i feel#but then again i dont demand this accuracy from others myself. its okay if i take it a bit easy i dont have to force myself. my autismening#can come antyime it wants and needs to. i just feel bad bc this is my main hyperfix.#okay sorry about that i just needed to mention all this as its been kinda killing me for months.#but anyways despite all of this i LOVE thinkin abt toontown and what stories and changes could be made and told!!!!#pleaaase do keep sending me these types of asks even if its about ocs and stuff i encourage you#IS FOAMING AT THE MOUTH#rambles
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you ever get so mad about how incorrect someone is about your hyperfixation that you literally start crying and screaming
#me and my brother got into a bioshock related argument and he literally didn’t even know that andrew ryan is based on ayn rand#he tried to say that our man andy ryan was a communist and that booker was in the right against the vox populi#i was foaming at the mouth fr#80% OF THE CHARACTERS ARE NAMED AFTER AYN RAND AND HER NOVELS#THEY DONT TRY TO HIDE IT EITHER ATLAS AND FONTAINE IS LITERALLY JUST THE TITLES ATLAS SHRUGGED AND THE FOUTAIN HEAD BRO COME ON#(new york accent) awhtism#i wouldn’t be that mad about all of this if he didn’t try to tell me i was wrong like my guy I KNOW MORE THAN YOU ABOUT THIS#ITS ONE OF TWO THINGS I HAVE KNOWLEGE ABOUT DO NOT TEST ME#my ass said like two days ago that i don’t really have meltdowns 🧍🏼i am a liar and a fool#i didn’t even adress the vox populi thing that hard but i think i’ll explode if i start talking about that one#that just boils down to barley disguised racism and anti radicalism that some people are just rockin with for some reason#infinite bad other two good blah blah you know the vibe#rant?? i suppose#shut up emma
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the stereotype of rwingers becoming trans and then trying to become leftists shouldnt be a "ewww you're morally impure and havent been a perfect progressive since you were a fetus like I have" type of thing, if anything it should open up a broader conversation on how a lot of people amab are basically from day one being indoctrinated into the right thus making it harder for people to accept themselves and thats very concerning and we need to do something to stop this.
#and no amount of shouting 'men bad' will fix this btw. not that some of you care. you just want to shout....#and then ur like 'im just venting !!!!' on a post that's clearly made to get attention and reblogs.............#if ur just venting why are u providing links and wanting to spread this information#i just hate when ppl have a lot of shit to say but never any solutions. its like. great thanks i already know that. now what.#now what do we do to make things better? and if it required you to change in any way would you be willing to do so?#and some ppl dont wanna answer those questions bc they just want to rant but for some reason cant do that w/o trying to make it#a political post to get reblogs on tumblr..? if its a vent post turn off reblogs. like.???????#bc you providing links n shit and making it seem like you want the info spread but no one can critique you on how you provide#0 solutions or ideas in any capacity on how to fix things and just only ever demonize men- is giving heavy propaganda vibes#like i dont think ur doing it intentionally as propaganda i think ur just defensive but thats how its coming off#you're basically saying 'men bad' and thats it. like thats the only substance to what you're saying. theres never a solution.#theres never a light at the end of the tunnel. just. men bad. forever and ever. and that feels propaganda-y to me.#like as if you're a rwinger trying to convince me black ppl are all violent by only ever showing me stuff of black ppl being violent#and not even ever providing solutions to a fake problem so the natural conclusion i the viewer am to come to is 'black people violent.#always violent. should avoid' bc thats how racist propaganda works...... and... well.... *eyes your blog up and down*... yeah...#and thats not me saying 'men r oppressed like black people' thats me making an analogy that's similar. idk why acting that way#would suddenly be okay behavior if its about men instead........ like........... tf. doing this about anything is weird and sus as fuck lik#what possible reason would you have to antagonize and demonize something that much#its like. that subreddit of people who hate dogs. like they cant ever see dogs in a positive light ever and its just like weirdly cruel#for no real reason...? idk... and even if they have valid trauma about dogs like... maybe this level of vitriol to where you are quite#literally foaming at the mouth isnt good for you and you need to like look into why that's your reaction and why you think its ok to act#like that#and i dont mean that in a 'lol ur foaming at the mouth' i mean it in a 'im genuinely concerned about how upset you are' kind of way
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thinking about hooni
#like hes literally me#like ACTUALLY me. like i am THE hooni.#like thats my story and life right there#his personality? me#just. everything#he plays overwatch too and rages at it like i doooo#he gets into questionable situations.... erm like me#unlucky in literally every way. everything that could go wrong does. i get it#weird social media phase? yeah. tell me about it#like i love him so much like. i cannot even put it into words#i draw [redacted] of him. i DONT CARE#i think about him. every day#truly my blorbo#hes so sad and gives me injured animal vibes. also me#im very autistic about him and i do NOT apologize about it#i have a photo album dedicated to him#i name myself hooni online#i draw him. all the time. and i stare at my drawings of him#will i regret this post? maybe#but for now#thog dont caare#no doubles#fuck u fuck ur cartoon hotdog husband fuck his stupid sunglasses and fuck the ketchup kids and fuck their sunglasses#IM HIM.#like even in my natural state. i am him. no cosplay comes close#barking and foaming at the mouth etc
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toji realizes he’s in love with you when he lets you shave his face for the first time,
he’s got the biggest grump of a scowl plastered on his naturally crooked lips. as he’s glowering, he’s also trying to prevent himself from smiling because you looked so cute. your touch with him was gentle—like it always was. after you wiped his face with a dampened face towel, you rub your hands against the lower part of his jaw. “soooo,” you utter, breaking the dead silence as he’s just peering down at you. “tell me ‘bout your day, toji.”
with the palms of your hands tenderly caressing against his chiseled jawline—you smear every part of his chin and cheekbones with shaving cream. even the secluded areas underneath his nose. as you do so, toji tchs. “day was fine, baby. ‘n i told ya i can shave myself.”
“i know i know,” you hum, creating a circular motion with your hands before gently making sure every sector near the lower part of his face was lathered with nice frothy amounts of shaving cream. “wowww, you’ve got such soft skin. skin routine when?”
“ugh, y’er insufferable,” he rolls his eyes. although, his skin was surprisingly clear. toji only had a bit of a stubble, hardly any facial hair but it was growing the more he aged. you took it upon yourself to ask to help him shave and he said yes, not realizing how much he’d soon grow to like it. the feeling of your delicate, warm hands rubbing against his face was somewhat . . soothing. with a deep, heaving sigh, toji’s hooded jade eyes meet yours. he spots your pout and his shoulders lower. “alright fine, i’ll teach you one day. only if ya stop poutin'..”
with a cheeky grin, your little pout falters and you smile. “okay,” and you wait for about a good three minutes to allow the spumous cream to souse everywhere on his pores. it takes a while—and as you wait, you take a moment to stare at his features. toji was definitely easy on the eyes up close. naturally long black lashes of his flicker as he returns your loving gaze, and he avoids eye contact for a moment. perhaps you were making him a bit . . nervous. darkened eyebrows of his arch into an almost sheepish raise while he watches your adorable curious simper stretch further. “don’t be so stiff, what are you, nervous?”
“not nervous. jus’ don’t want ya to cut my face off.” he grumbles in a hoarse tone, ogling intently at you opening the bathroom cabinet for his razor. “you know what y’er doin’ right? i’d like ‘ta keep my face.”
“oh, don’t be dramatic,” and now it’s your turn to roll your eyes. toji’s got a growing smirk tugging against his lips as he gawks you carefully start to shave in the exact sectors of where his facial hair resides. you did lots and lots of research—he knew this because he caught you reading various wikiHow articles on how to shave a guy’s face correctly. toji would never in a million years tell you, but he found that fact entirely adorable. you made sure you knew how to avoid burns and razor bumps. as you’re fixated on his chin, you mumble, “you’ll keep your pretty face, don’t cry.”
“aw, think ‘m pretty?” toji says, and you see the playful glint in his eyes. he’s easing up a bit, and he acknowledges that you were right. right about his stiffness, he was a bit tense. shoulders raised and all, but now—as of late, he’s starting to calm down a bit the more you talk to him. “i’d prefer the term 'handsome' but that works too, i guess.”
you deadpan, continuing your trail against his face—the razor sings out a shrieking tiiiing the more you gingerly shave with soft, gentle strokes.
it’s somewhat relaxing with the way the edges of the instrument adapts to the chiseled contours on his face. the foam starts to come off within each downward stroke and you’re very slow and precise. “okay, don’t be cocky,” you titter, and he feels his heart flutter a bit at how you’re just so dedicated. you’re so focused that your tongue briefly sticks out of your mouth, trying to make sure you do it perfectly. you tried your hardest not to cut him—you were so careful and that simple detail alone could have been enough for him to propose. “you should let me do this more. ‘s kinda fun.”
“eh. maybe,” toji shrugs, his voice coming out in a rough rasp. he doesn’t even realize it but his expressions significantly soften. he was only this way around you. to him, the thought of that was kind of scary. after you start to edge with the precision trimmer and reach underneath his nose and chin, you wrap it up. successfully discarding all of the foamy cream from his face, spotting his now clean jawline, you break away to rinse off the now grubby blades in the sink. “all done?”
“wait— don’t look yet,” you gasp, preventing him from gazing at himself in the mirror. “i still have to do the uh . . what’s it called again?”
toji snickers. “aftershave, baby.”
“aftershave,” you repeat. “right right,” and you’re so cute, kneeling down towards the wooden cabinet directly underneath the sink. you take out the mini bottle, pouring a nice goopy amount into your palm. you let toji wash his face with cold water first, patting it dry, and then you start to bedaub the facial balm in all the sensitive areas against his skin. he adores the mushy texture of your hands making contact with his face as each second passes. toji’s eyeing you, an almost grunt leaving his lips as a thumb of yours gently tickles against his infamous scar. the scar that slants itself near the right side of his lip. “thereee we go,” you give him a soft smile, the aromatic scent of tea tree oil setting against your nostrils. up close, his pores were now all so clear and you stare in awe for a bit at just how charming he was. the moisture that lays against his skin feels a lot more smooth. you grow silent for a moment before your own face softens. “okayyy, ‘m done.”
toji finally glances into the mirror, seeing his freshly new spotless face and he sees your proud toothy grin in the mirror’s reflection behind him. he cranes his neck to the side, feeling the once rough texture of his jawline now soft. he then lets off a tiny exhale. “looks good. y’er a natural,” and he turns to face you, he’s pondering on what to say. oh, your eyes sparkled with such admiration from his praise that it was just adorable. “thank you, sweetheart. for y’know . . takin’ care of me. y’er really . . sweet.”
and with that, his lips inch down to press a warm kiss against the crown of your head. your heart immediately swarms up with a frantic school of butterflies and so does his. toji prepares speak again and it’s an almost inaudible mumble. you could barely even register what he said at first because it was so hushed, but toji gruffs in a low tone. “i … love you..”
“h- huh?”
scoffing, he hides the burning embarrassed flush against his face by pulling you into his broad chest. you giggle at how he just abruptly snatches you close into his warm body before he slings a beefy arm around you. “i said, let’s uh.. do our skin care together later t’night.”
“awww i love you too toj—”
“oh my god, s-shut up..”
#★vegasbaby.#toji x reader#toji fluff#toji fushiguro x reader#toji x you#toji x y/n#jjk fluff#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk drabbles#jjk fic#jjk imagines
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