#fluffy-marshmallow-heart fanfic

[sunshiline-writes]

Chocolatería

I made a fluffy fanfic for Az @demondamage so he can feel better after surgery!! It includes Hot Chocolate and Az's Ocs! Warren and Aziphem. Its serious just comfort and fluff. Anyway! Hope this made Az feel better! __

The little demon was shaking next to the fire. As if the cold had bore into his very soul. Did.. people  (creatures?) like him have souls? Warren wrote in his notebook yet another question to ask Aziphem when he felt like talking. Would the question be answered? Probably not. Warren sighed, this was not something that he signed up for. But looking at Azzie sitting there by the fire, still shaking like a leaf, he couldn’t help but feel his heart wrench for him. It had taken him forever to just get him into the house, let alone accept a blanket or two from him. Warren wanted to give him at least a little bit of peace. Just a second where the demon felt safe. Genuinely safe. One thing at a time though. First things first, he had to get Azzie warm. The blankets and the fire wasn’t enough and the little thing was too damn stubborn to admit it. Warren thought for a moment before he thought of something. Then Warren was in the kitchen with a pot on the stove, pouring milk, pulling out a few packets of hot chocolate mix. Warren was smiling to himself, as he waited for the milk to heat up. 

“What are you doing, human?” Aziphems' voice rang out, quiet, a blanket curled over his shoulders, wrapping him up effectively. His dark eyes, even the third one on his forehead, watched him cautiously. There seemed to be a bit of fear in them, wariness. God what happened to him before Warren had found him broken outside in the forest. 

“I’m making you hot chocolate, to help you warm up,” Warren said slowly, he had planned for it to be a surprise but Aziphem had other plans. Aziphem stepped backwards, bearing his teeth at Warren. 

“I don’t need anything from you,” he said, growling. 

“I know that,” came the automatic, tired response. 

This seemed to be surprising to Aziphem, who frowned. Pursing his lips. “You.. You say you know, but then you continue giving me things,” he said, confused. “Remember our conversation about why I'm helping you? That I don’t have an ulterior motive? That I can’t take things from you because you’re so much stronger than me, and faster, and, you can totally rip me apart and-” 

Aziphem had a ghost of a smile on his face. 

“Ah you can smile. It’s cute,” he said, not really thinking about what he had said. 

There was a silence in the room as Warren blushed and turned back to the warm milk on the stove, throwing the mix into the pot and stirring it. He was so.. Stupid. Why did he just say that? 

“You’re blushing,” Aziphem helpfully pointed out, smirking. Warren rubbed his face with his hand, as if that would rub the blush from his skin. He sighed and grabbed two mugs from the cabinet. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Warren said, smiling at Azzi, trying to let him know that it was all in good fun. Gentle teasing. 

“Right, of course not,” Azzie played along, watching Warren tip the hot chocolate in the mugs, watching it steam. Azzie immediately went to snatch the mug and Warren stopped him with a whine. 

“Hold on Azzie! I haven’t even put in the best part!” Aziphem pouted and Warren smiled, going to look for the marshmallows. “I promise you’ll love it.” He cursed lightly in Spanish as he dug through the pantry. “I swear I have them.” Aziphem watched, slightly amused at the dumb human looking like he was going through an existential crisis about marshmallows. Then the man made an excited noise and raised his head, banging it on the top of the pantry with a low groan. “Ayyy,” he grumbled, one hand rubbing his head and the other clutching the marshmallows like his life depended on it. “Hey, hey! Don’t laugh, that hurt,” Warren said pouting. 

Azzie stayed quiet but there was still a smile on his face as he watched Warren grumpily make his way to the mugs, tearing open the bag and grabbing a handful. Placing that handful on the counter, then grabbing another handful of marshmallows splitting it in the chocolatey drink. Aziphem grabbed the handful of marshmallows and stuffed them in his mouth, chewing as Warren grabbed his own mug, leaning against the counter. 

He watched as Aziphem grabbed the other mug, holding it close to his chest as he peered into it. Whispering a quiet, “Thank you,” as he took a sip. 

How long had it been since he was shown kindness without expecting anything in return? The question burned in Warren's head as he took another sip of the hot chocolate. 

“There’s a word for this in Spanish you know,” Warren spoke, wanting for a second to fill the silence. Just for a moment. Aziphem looked up, eyes bright with the question. “It’s like when a group of people get together and have hot chocolate,” Warren paused and grinned, “Chocolatería.” 

“Choco..” Aziphem trailed off, the word hard on his tongue. 

“Latería,” Warren finished gently. 

“I’ll let you speak the Spanish here,” Aziphem said with a roll of his eyes, taking another sip of the chocolate. He had long ago stopped shaking. But he took the drink anyway. 

“Yeah, I think that’s best,” Warren said with a laugh. “Want to watch a movie?” “Sure.”

“Come on then Azzie.” 

They sat that night on the same couch, it was a step in the right direction. There was a stillness in the air that was comfortable and quiet. Warren couldn’t get Aziphems smile out of his head. He even went to bed thinking about it. Maybe he could help a little more than he thought. Little by little, step by step. 

Little by little, step by step. 

[drake-walker-appreciation]

Masterlist of Drake Creators

Not a complete list by any means. This is a work in progress. Feel free to rec writers in the comments.

Authors

alwaysmychoices

angelascribbles

angstymarshamallow

argylemnwrites

axwalker

burnsoslow

camillemontespan

drakeandkatherine

drakexwillow

dukedrakes

flowerpowelltales

fluffy-marshmallow-heart

harleybeaumont

karahalloway

kat-tia801

kd-ohd-fanfic

lilacsandwhiskey

@marshmallowsandfire

nestledonthaveone

petiteboheme

tornbetween2loves

twinkleallnight

sillydg

walkerismychoice

Art, Edits and Moodboards

mskaneko

[amalthiaph]

I don't ship Fennec Shand x Boba Fett (yet), but I kinda like the idea. Do you have any fanfics about them to recommend?

Okay, first of all, TYSM for the Ask! It makes my little heart happy.

I only ever read THIS. It's so fluffy, it can make a marshmallow run for its money.

I like Fennec x Boba because it's got this "Tough Ones Soft Only For One Another" vibe to it.

[fluffy-marshmallow-heart]

In The Deep

The Elementalist

Beckett x MC (Oriana)

words: 3390

warnings: NSFW

Complete Master List

I've had this sitting unfinished for quite awhile, ever since the mer-party chapter of TE2. This is my version of events from Beckett's POV (My version does indeed go off canon. This is what I wanted to have happen that chapter)

Hope you enjoy!

Beckett stood off to the side, watching Oriana’s every move. She looked stunning in a mermaid outfit, and even dyed her hair a rainbow of colors. She threw herself into this party 100%, and he kept catching her eyeing him. He wanted to pull her in, pull her close, tell her to stay with him all night, hell, his whole life. Right now, she was talking to Cyran, a merman, who was desperately flirting with her.

  “Beckett, man, come on! There’s someone juggling shells!”

“Not now Zeph.” He growled as Cyran pointed up, Oriana looking up with him. There was a strange orange plant hanging above them.

“You better make your move soon, Beckster. She’s not going to wait forever.”

Beckett pinched the bridge of his nose before facing Zephyr. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes you do. But suit yourself. Guess you don’t mind her making out with other people then?”

“WHAT??” Beckett whirled back around, just in time to see Cyran shoving his tongue down Oriana’s throat, and worse…Oriana was extremely into it, running her hands all along the guy’s body. His scales are shining brilliantly as a swirl of water brings them closer and closer together. Soon enough they’d be one.

Beckett went completely rigid, his hands curled into fists. How dare she? Am I nothing? She can’t even be decent enough to not make out with someone right in front of me??

“Unbelievable. Some people have no class. Right, Zeph?” He was met with silence. “Zeph?” Turning back around, Zeph is no longer in sight. Beckett sighed, running his fingers through his hair, turning back to where Oriana had been. She was talking to Cyran now, both still smiling giddily at each other.

I can’t believe she would do that. I thought we had something special.

Beckett glared at them until they finally swam over.

“Hey, Beck. Cyran’s going to show us a reef. You want to come?”

“Gee, Oriana, I don’t know. Think there’s enough room for me to tag along?” He snapped.

Oriana furrowed her eyebrows in confusion, but said nothing else, just swam and asked Shreya, Zeph, and Griffin, who all agreed to go readily. Beckett scowled as he trailed behind, noticing how Cyran used every excuse he could to touch Oriana.

What a jerk. He must know we’re together…right? She would have told him, I’m sure…right?

Cyran leads everyone through the water, far past the city to a beautiful reef. A school of pufferfish dart past and go swimming straight through a nearby whirlpool, while giant bubbles float up from the coral.

“Welcome to the Guppie Garden.” He announced.

Beckett looked around in awe, momentarily forgetting he was upset. “Cyran, is it true this is where merfolk children learn how to swim?”

Shreya elbows him in the side.  “Beckett, can you stop being a nerd for five seconds and just have some fun?”

Cyran laughs. “Actually, they’re born from the kelaktin here and they spend the first ten years as polyps inside of it.”

Beckett gapes and digs around his pockets for a pen. I must have a pen, I always have a pen, I can’t believe it, I had no idea! Why do no textbooks include this information??

Cyran laughs again, shaking his head. “Please don’t write that down. I’d never hear the end of it if a lie like that made it to the surface.”

A…lie? He made it up to fool me?”

“There’s so much going on here, I don’t even know where to start!” Oriana exclaimed. Beckett slid his eyes over to her, disappointed she was oblivious to what just happened.

She doesn’t even care he just made a fool of me. Unbelievable!

Zeph grinned. “Isn’t the answer obvious? I’m going to get thrown around by that whirlpool! I’ve heard merfolk whirls makes you see visions of the future!”

Griffin chuckled. “I think I’ll stick to bouncing on the Sand Bubbles. If you listen closely, you can supposedly hear voices from the past.”

“I want to befriend that school of fish! I bet they’ve seen every inch of this lake and have wonderful stories to tell!” Aster said excitedly.

Finally, someone makes sense around here. “I’ll join you Aster.” He swims with her, not glancing behind him.

Suddenly, he heard Oriana’s voice. “I want to talk with the fish too!” She swims over to Beckett and Aster, who are already examining a playful pufferfish.

Beckett couldn’t believe his luck in seeing this specific species. “These are Adoria Puffers. They live unnaturally long lives and have an unhealthy obsession with romance.”

I used to think all romance was unhealthy…

Aster clapped her hands together gleefully. “They told me about how my parents fell in love! My father grew my mother a garden on the other side of the lake, near the grove!”

The pufferfish fixes Oriana with a hard stare and lets out a long stream of bubbles.

Aster giggled. “He thinks you and Beckett are a good match. He wants you to make it official.”

What??

Oriana winks at Beckett. “Oh, is that so? Well, I’ll have to consult Beckett about that one.”

He scoffed in reply. “Oriana, please don’t tell me you’re going to take dating advice from a fish.”

She gave him a hard look, and he felt he might implode under her gaze. What is she thinking right now? God, she’s so gorgeous, look at those lips pouting at me.

But then she swims over to Cyran and he shows her a beautiful shell in his hands. Beckett stiffened.

He’s giving her a pearl. An actual pearl. One that’s at least a hundred years old.

“He’s got game Beckonator.” Zeph was at his side again. “And also, despite all of us saying it, a fish has now told you to make her your girlfriend. And still you disagree?”

“Well, I…”

But Zeph was gone again as everyone left the reef. Beckett kept an eye on Oriana, getting more and more angry at her flirtation with the merman.

Quite obviously, she doesn’t want to be my girlfriend. If she did, she wouldn’t be kissing a fish on the cheek.

As the friends are swimming playfully through a bed of lake weeds that rise high above them, Beckett lost sight of everyone, and managed to get himself trapped. Literally. He couldn’t move. A few minutes later, Oriana emerged in the thick canopy and swam straight into him.

She smirked, seeing how tangled up he was. “Fancy meeting you here, looks like you’ve got a bit of a situation going on.”

“Ah, good, Oriana. I’m afraid I’ve gotten rather tangled in these strands of lalip.”

She leans in and presses her lips to Beckett’s, nipping teasingly at his lower lip.

Oh god, not now…I can’t even kiss her back. “Oriana, as much as I appreciate the attention, I would prefer it if I could reciprocate.”

“I don’t know. I like having you all tied up and at my mercy.” She gives him another kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck to pull him closer before finally disentangling him from the lake weeds. He turns to her, his gaze soft.

“I was actually looking for you when the lalip caught me. I was thinking we could find someplace a bit more private…” He blushes and clears his throat. “Some merfolk informed me about a secretive cove not too far from here. It’s said to be quite beautiful to behold.”

He paused before smiling. “Although it will pale in comparison to how you look tonight.”

“I love it when you sweet talk me.” She teased.

He continued, ignoring her tone. “I was thinking we could disappear for a bit, and get some time alone. The party is nice, but I’d rather it just be the two of us.”

She tapped her chin thoughtfully. “That does sound like fun.”

Beckett’s eyes linger on her, but she glances through the weeds at each of their friends.

Wow. Maybe I misread our entire relationship.

Then she leans in close to whisper in his ear. “Getting some alone time with you sounds like just what I need.”

He felt himself getting hard in his pants. “Then let’s go before we get roped into this Whirl game.” He takes her hand and dives down through the water. They swim to a rocky wall with a circular opening at the bottom and go through it. They emerge from the cavern into a glowing grotto filled with crystal clear water, their heads bobbing up just above the water’s surface. Blue light sparkles and dances along the walls, casting them both in its soft glow.

“This is beautiful…” She gasped, looking around in wonder.

He nods appreciatively. “Ah, yes, this light is the result of the bioluminescent aquadeliphine. It’s a special type of algae cultivated by the merfolk. They use it for a number of their foods and medicines, but we don’t know much more about it, as it’s never been well studied.”

Oriana rolled her eyes. “Tell me you didn’t bring me here only to tell me about magickal algae.”

He smirked. “Not only…” He slides his arms around her waist as he leans forward and kisses her. When she reciprocates, he deepens the kiss and presses her up against the wall of the grotto, fully aware of the rough rock digging into her back.

A little pain perhaps, for making out with someone who wasn’t me.

“Someone’s eager.” She laughs.

You haven’t seen just how eager yet. “I just want to make every second we have together count.”

She surges forward to kiss him and his eyes go wide as the heat between them grows. She nips playfully at his lower lips, grazing the soft skin there as she takes it between her teeth. He gasps and his grip around her waist tightens, digging his fingers into her skin.

He looks at her radiant face. “How do you always do this to me, make it so you’re the only one in existence…”

“It’s a special talent.” She joked.

He meets her in a fiery kiss, his lips sliding roughly against hers, as they sink below the lake’s surface, completely submerged. He licks over her lower lip, urging her to surrender, until all she can do is give in.

“For the record, you make me feel the same way.” She breathed.

I…do? Then why…ah hell with it. I want her so bad.

Beckett trails kisses down her jaw to her neck, his teeth brushing over her skin and making her shiver. With his lips still pressed against her neck, he whispers, his words sending vibrations through the water… “Tell me what you want.”

“I want all of you.”

He inhaled sharply. “Well, I’m right here.”

She pops open his blazer and push it off his shoulders. She slowly undoes the buttons of his shirt, tracing a finger down the center of his chest and raising goosebumps on his skin. He shrugs out of his shirt, and she drops her hands down to help him out of his pants. She presses her hand against his erection, making him moan, and then pulls away teasingly.

He groaned. “Must you torture me so?”

“You know you love it.” She returned playfully.

“I love you.” He said, not even thinking. They both froze their movements as the reality of what he said sunk in.

“Um…” He cuts her off with his lips, not even wanting her to continue that sentence.

How many times must I embarrass myself today? This is terrible, she’s going to hate me for saying that. I need to keep her distracted, keep her turned on so she can’t think of it.

He begins to undress her, layer by layer, agonizingly slow, kissing her the entire time. She shivers as the last of her clothes drift down to join his on the rocky floor. His eyes sweep her revealed body, taking in every inch of it. “This is a view I could never get tired of…”

“Flatterer.” But her eyes were serious, as though she really wanted to say something, but Beckett wasn’t giving her a chance. With her clothing out of the way, he pulls her against him, the heat of her body a sharp contrast to the chilly water. She runs her hands down his chest, the lean muscle flexing beneath her palms.

“Let me…” He kisses down her neck to her chest, his lips sending sparks of pleasure through her body. He inches her underwear down to kiss the juncture of her hips. He nips at her skin and she gasps.

“Beckett!”

God I love the sound of my name on her lips.

He dips his hand into her underwear and brushes over her slit with a feather-light touch, making her hips quake. He pulls his hand away as he kisses her shoulder. “I actually had an idea…I know a spell that can dim the light in the cavern and heighten your senses, so you feel more. Would you be interested in trying it?”

Please say yes, I spent so much time researching this…

“Let’s turn off the lights.” She whispered.

“As you wish.” He gently touches two fingers to her temple and the light around them fades, leaving them in complete darkness. Beckett drifts away from her, extremely excited for what’s to come.

“Beckett?”

“Shhh, I’m right here.” He’s directly behind her now, his mouth right beside her ear. His chest presses against her back, enveloping her in his warmth. His fingers slip into her underwear again, and he slowly pulls them down, leaving her completely exposed.

“Ohh…”

He slides his hand between her legs, pressing against her as her hips jerk in response.

“Mmm that’s my girl…so wet…so tight…” He kisses her shoulder and bites down gently on it as his hand moves faster. She throws her head back and moans.

“Keep making those noises…” He threatened.

In the dark, he can feel everywhere the two of them are touching, each connection like a live wire of pleasure. Her breathing was becoming ragged, as he pumped his fingers in and out of her body.

“Beckett…” She trembled.

“Yes, love?”

“Oh god, Beck…”

She was writhing against his body, his dick pressed firmly against her back, making him want to take her so hard she’d never think of that Cyran guy again…

Cyran….

He stopped his hand, sliding it out of her, a whimper of disapproval escaping her. He scraped his teeth over the pulse point in her neck.

“Not so fast.” His voice was hoarse, his heart thundering. “Tell me, Oriana…why did you let Cyran kiss you?”

“W…what?” She tried to turn around to face him, but he held her in place tightly.

“I want to know why you made out with him.”

“Why not?” She gasped as he slipped a finger back inside her tightness.

“Did you know I saw it?” He murmured

She leaned her head back on his shoulder as he slipped another finger in, then tweaked her nipple with his other hand. She bucked into his touch, moaning. He paused all movement. “Did you?” He demanded.

“Why does it matter?” She challenged breathlessly. “It’s not like I’m yours.”

“Yes, you are. You are mine, Oriana, and I don’t like sharing my things. Especially with a merman whom you’ll never see again.”

“If I never see him again then what does it matter if I have a little fun first?”

What does it matter?? What does it matter??????????

“It matters because you’re also making out with me.” He growled. “You can’t do that.”

“Why not?” She shot back, clearly getting angry. “I’m not your girlfriend. Even a fucking fish said we should be official, and you know what you did? You blew it off. So in my opinion, you are I must just be having fun with each other, nothing serious, otherwise…”

“Otherwise…? He pressed.

She finally pushed him away and whirled on him, startling him so much that the blue lighting of the grotto came back.

“Otherwise, you would have asked me to be your girlfriend by now. Otherwise, you would have let me tell you that I love you too. But you didn’t ask, and you didn’t want to listen.”

Her chest was heaving, her eyes practically on fire.

“You…you love me?” He whispered, shocked.

“How is that not obvious?” She exclaimed. “Of course I do, and of course I knew you were watching. Why do you think I did it in the first place? Why on earth would I ever want to kiss someone who wasn’t you? Oh yeah, I know, because you only want to fuck me!!!”

“How can you say that?” He gasped, his face a shade of scarlet. “I try so hard for you! Everything I do is for you! You occupy all of my waking thoughts, and when I’m asleep, I see you again. You’re my dream, Oriana. It’s you, it’s always been you.”

“You have a funny way of showing it.” She muttered, diving down to retrieve her clothes.

Beckett dove down with her, grabbing her gently by the arm and crashing his lips to hers before she reached the bottom. “I love you, Ori, and I want you to be my girlfriend. I have a list of reasons why we should be together, I just didn’t think you were ready to hear them, but since you are, reason #1 is…”

“Beckett stop!” She laughs. “I don’t need a list of reasons why we should be together. If I love you, and you love me…isn’t it the natural course of action to make our relationship status official?”

“Well, I…yes, I suppose it is.” Beckett’s heart was thundering. To his horror, he began to ramble. “It’s just I’ve never been in this position, you see, I don’t know how these things work, and although I treasure you, I didn’t realize those feelings were returned just as strongly, and I…”

Oriana kissed him hard, leaving him breathless. “And you got jealous seeing someone else ‘treasure me’?”

He murmured in her ear. “I don’t think anyone can treasure you as greatly as I do, Ori.”

“I want you to show your girlfriend what you mean by that.”

My girlfriend……

He smirked, and a second later their world went dark again. He ghosted kisses along her body, turning up the heat again as he played with her clit, the friction causing moan and after moan, each one louder than the last, slip out of her. He gently re-positioned their bodies as he slowly slid his length deep inside her.

She gasped at how full he made her, as he felt her walls stretch to accommodate his size. “I will never tire of this.” He voice was hoarse as he pulled her earlobe with his teeth, his hot breath skimming across her ear.

“More…I need more…” She pleaded.

“Anything you want.” He moved her against the wall, her hands pressed up against it as he fucked harder, faster, thrusting deep inside her pussy as they both grunted at the feeling.

“Ori…call me your boyfriend.”

“You’re my boyfriend!!”

That is the hottest thing I’ve ever heard.

“I love you, Ori.”

“I love you too, Beck!!!” Oriana screamed as she came, shuddering hard around his cock, squeezing him so tight he exploded inside her, emptying his seed completely deep inside her belly.

Oriana turned back around, capturing his lips in a heated kiss. “You’re my everything, Beck.”

He blushed furiously, feeling it all over his body. “It’s a good thing you’re…you’re my girlfriend now.” He finished shyly.

Oriana bit down on her lip. It was one of his favorite things to witness. “So, I guess I shouldn’t kiss Cyran after the party?” She joked.

Beckett’s mouth fell open. “What? No! Of course, not!”

She giggled, and he lunged at her as she shrieked playfully. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” She laughed.

“Don’t make me punish you for that.” He growled.

She eyed him slyly. “I think I may already need some punishment, Beck. What ever did you have in mind?”

She’s a goddess. Oh, my lord she’s a complete goddess.

“Let me show you.” He said darkly, as their lips met again, the two lovers getting lost in each other in the confines of the hidden cove, having no concept of the time passing in the outside world.

    @feartheendlesssummer @elainew13 @the-soot-sprite @paisleylovergirl @dottie-minerva-mikas @emichelle @kendrasgue @pbmychoices @flyawayboo @divergentofhogwarts @sonsie0613 @brightpinkpeppercorn @symonde @emceesynonymroll @cordoniasmost @perriewinklenerdie

@annekebbphotography @gardeningourmet @zigortega4life @eileendannie @thequeenofcronuts @drakewalkerfantasy @friedherringclodthing @coffeebeandragon @drakewalker04 @jlpplays1 @desiree-0816

@alesana45 @mfackenthal

[drakewalkerfantasy]

Flames of yesterday: Chapter 9

Summary: 5 years ago they made a mistake. They were two broken men drinking away their love life issues, and one girl trying to help a friend. What the night leaves them with are two broken hearts and one nearly broken friendship. 5 years later, two are still broken and another one fixed. But what happens when they all meet again? Will it open old wounds and bring all the their insecurities rushing back?  Or will it mend the two hearts still looking for warmth, unable to find it after their parting?

Words: 3353

Authors notes: A crossover of Open Heart and the Elementalists, a collaboration series by @drakewalkerfantasy and @fluffy-marshmallow-heart

Ethan x OH MC (Diana)

Beckett x TE MC (Oriana)

**Warnings: no warnings needed**

Leaving the hospital Diana mindlessly walked along the streets trying to clear her head, not caring where she’s going. Ethan’s harsh words still thunder in her head, followed by his gentle ones, drowning out all other thoughts. In a worthless attempt she tried to forget all of it, tried to forget the hope she felt, and the warmth of his hands holding hers. Her hands still feeling the memory of their fingers brushing, sending a current of electricity through her body.

For a moment she thought that this was a dream, simply wishful thinking to distract her from the memories of the past. The protection mechanism her brain used to make the pain go away, but the bandage was the distant reminder that this time it was real… he was real. Distantly she remembered how close he was, how his eyes got stormy just for a second and it seemed that it took everything in him not to snap, kissing her senselessly in this supply closet. She sighed heavily, leaning on the handrail of a wooden bridge. Even not realising it, she came to her favourite place. The place her mother usually took her to when she was a child, when she wasn’t so terribly sick. To the place where she and Beckett came every year from the day her mother died to throw flowers in the river. Even five years ago when they fell apart, he still came standing by her side, not speaking, but quietly throwing soft flowers into the water.

She raised her face, letting the warm wind wash over her, standing there for a moment longer before finally heading home. When she got home it was already late and she slowly went through the darkness, enjoying the quietness and loneliness of the place. Her minds still heavy with a myriad of thought, but the pain became fainter as an echo of memory that will always be with her. Sitting on the bed she reached for her mobile for the first time since leaving the hospital hours ago. Her heart fluttering in anticipation and hope when she sees three missed phone calls and two new voicemails but falls a bit a second later seeing familiar numbers. She hesitated for a moment, her finger freezing for a second above Beckett’s number, then Oriana’s, debating if she could call them so late in the evening…

This is probably too late. She thought looking at the clock, watching them pass past ten o’clock. Ori is probably already asleep with how exhausting pregnancy is. And Beckett will kill me if I would wake her up. With a smile Diana removed her finger moving to her voicemail box. Her heart squeezing in hope to hear Ethan’s voice, her fingers trembling a little. She heard a familiar cheerful voice on the other end, a small smile reaching her lips as if a small part of the happiness of the caller reached her, making her heart lighter.

“Diiii, It’s Ori. Listen, Beckett told me what happened at the café, and then said you ran off towards the end of your shift. I know both of you have the day off tomorrow, so I’m really really hoping you’ll come over and help with our nursery? Beckett is insisting that I don’t do any painting, even though it’s totally fine, but you know him, such a worry-wort.”

The ring of her laughter made a full smile spread on Diana’s face. “So anyways, think about it, cuz he’s driving me nuts. Talk later!

Diana shook her head, still smiling, knowing full well how Oriana and Beckett’s conversation about her painting in a small room would have gone. She can practically picture how much eye-rolling Oriana did until she finally gave up, called Beckett impossible and how she was going to call Diana so she could agree with her. A chuckle escaped Diana’s lips, the thought of Beckett and Oriana always made her happy. The two of them just clicked and she was a bit envious of that. That’s what she wants, she wants a relationship like theirs.

Her smile faltered with the next thought coursing through her. Ethan Ramsey.

Why so brazenly ask for my number if he still doesn’t plan to call me? She thought to herself. Subconsciously still hoping to hear his voice, unsure if she should or shouldn’t. Her fingers trembled before moving to the next message, Beckett’s warning from the other day thundering in her head. But everything died the moment she heard the second voicemail, the one she hoped to receive. Her heart fluttered when the message began.

“Dr. Haynes? I mean, Diana… This is Dr. Ramsey… Ethan Ramsey…”

She heard him clearing his throat as though nervous and he cursed quietly under his breath, making Diana giggle softly.

“Tommy’s blood test results are ready; I was hoping to share them with you…there was nothing conclusive, so I wanted to get your thoughts…” He trailed off again, and Diana sighed, realizing he only wanted to talk business. Until he spoke again, his words rushing out.

“And also to make sure you’re okay. I’ll call tomorrow, it’s getting late. I shouldn’t have called so late, I apologize.”

There was a click and the automated voice sounded in her ear next, asking if she wanted to keep the message or delete it. Of course she’s keeping it. Despite telling herself not to, she listened to the message several times that night, butterflies erupting in her stomach every time she heard the last few rushed sentences. She noticed he didn’t leave his number, but she fell asleep with a smile on her face for the first time in ages, knowing that meant it was guaranteed he would call her again.

The following morning, Diana head over to Beckett and Oriana’s house, armed with coffee for him and tea for her. She rang the doorbell and a minute later, a disheveled and paint covered Beckett opened the door.

Diana raised her eyebrows. “You do know you’re supposed to paint the walls…right?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Oriana thought it would be funny to fling paint at me. She’s still mad about not helping. It made her laugh, so I guess I shouldn’t complain but…” He gestured to his now ruined clothing.

Diana stifled a laugh as she brushed past him and into their house. Oriana burst into the foyer. “Oh thank god you’re here! Beck doesn’t know how to paint. I mean, look at him.”

Diana looked between Oriana’s smirking face and Beckett’s glowering one. A slow smile spreading on her face as she spoke to Beckett. “Wow. That’s some painting you’re doing. Good thing you called in an expert before you completely confused yourself with the wall. I mean honestly, who does that?”

Beckett’s mouth fell open as Diana handed Oriana her freshly brewed tea. “And also, you’re supposed to wear old clothing that you don’t care if you get paint on. That’s basically painting 101.”

“You two are impossible.” He grumbled under his breath, grabbing his coffee. “I’ll be upstairs. Painting. The walls.” Throwing one last glare at the girls, he disappeared up the stairs, the sound of music floating down.

Oriana and Diana burst out laughing.

“He just makes it so easy!” Oriana gloated as their laughter died down.

“He really does.” Diana agreed, still chuckling. “My goodness, you had a lot of fun doing that, didn’t you?”

“I did.” Oriana grinned. “He had it coming. Honestly, he wouldn’t even let me into the room! I had to be quick about it!”

“I believe it. I’m impressed, actually. Now, how areyou feeling? You’re not lightheaded or anything?”

Oriana groaned. “Not you too.”

“Just worried about my bestie.” Diana slung her arm around Oriana’s shoulder as they went into the kitchen and sat on the stools at the island.

Oriana sighed. “Honestly? I’m always nauseous, this heartburn is killing me, I’m getting slower and bigger by the day, my feet are swelling…girl, pregnancy is hard. And all I want to do is put the nursery together, but he won’t let me paint, or put furniture together, or lift anything…he’s driving me nuts! I’m pregnant, not helpless.”

“He just cares.” Diana sympathized. “You know you and this baby are his world, and he worries so much about you. You should hear him every day, talking about how he can’t wait for his break so he can call you and make sure you’re not dead.”

“He does not say that!” Oriana gasped.

“Well, no, not those exact words. I’m just filling in the blanks. Besides, at least you have someone to fret over you. That’s more than some of us…” Diana trailed off, looking at her friend guiltily. “Oh god, I’m sorry, that came out wrong.”

“How are things going with Ethan?” Oriana asked blatantly.

Diana’s eyebrows shot up. One thing about Oriana, she never beat around the bush. “Ummm. Well…it’s complicated. I guess. I don’t know, really.” But at the mention of Ethan’s name, Diana found herself smiling again.

“Okay, well. Spill. What happened yesterday?”

Diana grimaced. “First, he completely berated me. I was humiliated. It was a hard case, and it just reminded me of my mom, so I wasn’t focused, and he noticed and ugh, he was such a dick.”

“But you just smiled.” Oriana pointed out.

Diana shrugged. “Well…I ran off and ran into the first dark room I could find. A supply closet, naturally. You’d be surprised how many there are in that place, it’s crazy. And I was crying and went into a panic attack and I didn’t notice when someone came in, but I figured it was Beckett.”

Oriana stiffened a bit at the mention of it but quickly regained her composure as Diana continued.

“It turned out to be Ethan that followed me in there. He calmed me down, and I swear, Ori, I thought he might kiss me. He didn’t but, god I wish he had. I really like him. I try to deny it, but I just can’t. The attraction is so hard to ignore. I don’t know what to do, really.”

“Ahem.” Beckett appeared in the doorway. “Weren’t you going to help me paint?”

Diana rolled her eyes. “Fine, fine, interrupt our girl talk.”

Beckett’s cheeks flushed. “I just…wanted to get this done so I can build the crib.”

Diana laughed. “Well when you put it that way…” She hopped off the bar stool and, throwing a wink at Oriana, disappeared upstairs. When she walked into the room that would become their child’s, Diana felt a surge of pride. Her two best friends were bringing life into the world, a product of their love for each other. Diana was thrilled for them and couldn’t wait to become an Auntie.

They’d picked out a beautiful shade of sea foam green for the bottom half of the walls, and a light blue for the top half. Diana planned on making a few small white clouds as well. They’d chosen not to find out if it’s a boy or girl, which drove Diana nuts but it’s what they wanted. When deciding what to do for the nursery, Beckett had read that exposure to the color green may increase reading ability, and Oriana liked the blue for the calming aspect, so this is what they decided in the end.

“So? I’m at your disposal, where do you want me to start?” chimed Diana reaching for a paintbrush, but before she could take it, Beckett also bent down to dip his own brush into the paint, instead painting Diana’s jeans making her jump up with squeal. “Hey!!!”

“Sorry I…” started Beckett, trying to suppress his laugh from the pay back, even if it wasn’t done intentionally. But one look at Diana’s smirking face was enough for him to frown uncomprehendingly. “Why are you not mad?”

“Beckett, as I said, you don’t wear your good clothes to paint,” she laughed, watching his frowning expression while bursting in a fit of laughter. “You should see yourself right now.” She giggled, dipping her brush into blue paint making another line on her jeans next to Beckett’s.

“What are you doing? You are ruining them…”

“Old clothes… remember?” Diana laughed, painting the tip of Beckett’s nose blue before quickly stepping aside, further from him. “And this is how it’s done.”

“Oh, you are so going down for that,” he growled, almost tripping over the paint can.

“You wouldn’t dare,” Diana gasped, her eyes widening. “You know that you may accidentally spill the paint and Ori never forgive us if we stain the carpet.”

“Shit…” cursed Beckett throwing daggers at Diana with his eyes before hearing Oriana’s footsteps on the stair. “Peace,” they quickly agreed as he darted to the door.

“Guys, is everything is okay in here?” Oriana asked, being stopped by Beckett before she could enter the nursery, his hands on her shoulders and backing her away from entrance.

“Everything is fine, why wouldn’t it be? Also, I thought we agreed that you wouldn’t come near the nursery until the room is painted and thoroughly dried. How many times do I need to repeat that paint fumes can be unhealthy for you and the baby.” Beckett scolded, watching Oriana roll her eyes, but obediently stepping back.

“No… It was you who agreed I will not get anywhere near our baby’s room while you’re painting. But there was nothing said about checking on you two…” Oriana trailed off, finally registering the paint on Beckett’s nose. She rose an eyebrow at him.

“She started it.” Beckett frowned defensively.

“Play nice.” Oriana murmured, kissing him on the cheek softly. “Also, do either of you want anything? I planned on ordering some food.”

“Anything you want.” He responded immediately.

“I will never say no to food.” Diana chimed in, peeking out of the room.

Oriana stared at her blue painted jeans. Diana just shrugged. “He started it.”

“You two are the kids I never needed. Behave or both of you will be kicked out and I’ll do everything myself.” Oriana retorted, shaking her head.

Beckett’s ears were turning red. “Sorry, love. Just painting, got it. You can count on us. We’ll be finished in no time.” Beckett lightly kissed Oriana’s forehead, gently brushing her bump with his hand before letting her go.

After Oriana left downstairs, Beckett and Diana set to work both starting on opposite walls. When Diana was occupied with drawing the contours for a small cloud on the wall, she heard her phone vibrating in her back pocket. She could feel how her heart made a flip and butterflies erupted in her stomach. She glanced at Beckett who was still busy painting his wall in firm concentration. After a moment she finally answered her phone, her heart fluttering and she could feel the heat rising in her cheeks.

“Dr. Ramsey?” she murmured quietly, when a familiar voice sounded through the speaker. She knew it was him, even though she didn’t know the number.

“Diana…” Ethan spoke, his voice rambling low. “I thought we agreed that you will call me Ethan.”

“Yes of course. I remember agreeing to this,” spoke Diana biting her lower lip trying to hide the smile from Beckett, who was wholeheartedly absorbed in the painting and didn’t seem to notice anything around him. “Also sorry for not returning your call yesterday. It was quite late when I listened to your voicemail. Also, you didn’t leave your number so…” her voice trailed off and she fell silent, her heart thundering loudly.

“You shouldn’t apologize, I really shouldn’t call you so late…,” Ethan sighed, thinking of all the things he shouldn’t be doing or shouldn’t be dreaming of doing with this incredible girl. Diana smiled, hearing how his voice trembled slightly, imagining him raking his hand through his hair nervously before speaking again. “I just felt like I should check on you and make sure you are okay.”

“I’m feeling much better. Thanks to you. I’m very sorry you saw me like that.”

“I’m really glad that you’re feeling better. I was….” His voice dropped an octave lower and the next words made her eyes widen from the confession. “I was worried about you.”

“Why?” She whispered hoarsely, her throat dried out.

“Because I…” Diana could hear how Ethan took a deep breath, feeling how her heart fluttered in anticipation, waiting for what he would say.

“Di, if you finished with your side of the wall. Can you draw clouds on this part and… do you think it’d be okay to also draw Staff of Asclepius where the baby’s crib will be?”

Ethan literally stopped breathing when he heard Beckett’s voice through the speaker. She’s pregnant???

“Ethan?” Diana called, breaking through his thoughts. She could see Beckett watching her, raising his eyebrow questioningly. The uncomfortable silence from the phone was practically deafening to Diana.

Finally, Ethan cleared his throat and his voice flowed through the speaker again. “I was simply worried because I’m your attendee and you are my intern. You need to be at the top of your game, always.”

Ethan was kicking himself for lying, but what else could he do? He shut his eyes briefly, hoping that she won’t hear the truth in his voice. His heart dropped to the pit of his stomach as he continued. “So, as I said yesterday, Tommy’s blood test results are ready. If you have time to go through them with me?” asked Ethan in a professional voice, absolutely no emotion evident in his tone.

“Okay.” Diana acknowledged.

“There was nothing conclusive. Everything that we tested him for came back as negative. He didn’t ingest anything, touch anything or contract a parasite… Nothing.” Ethan told her.

Diana thought a moment. “Hmmm… can it be that Tommy isn’t sick because of an external cause, but rather an internal one? Something that isn’t new, but perhaps he’s been carrying all along?”

Ethan furrowed his eyebrows. “What do you mean, a genetic thing? We tested several…”

“No, nothing like this. Remember Tommy’s mother said that two weeks ago he was hospitalized with bacterial pneumonia? And prescribed azithromycin? What if…”

Diana stopped, chewing on her lower lip thoughtfully before continuing. “What if the antibiotic did its job a little too well and attacked the good bacteria along the bad one?”

“And this is why he is so sick…Good bacteria started producing toxins as a defense, and that’s what poisoning Tommy.”

“So, once we kill the strain that started attacking him, his digestion will be fine again.” Diana finished.

“This is brilliant. You are brilliant…” Ethan exclaimed before he was able to stop himself. He inhaled sharply before speaking again. “Thank you, Dr. Haynes. I hope you will find your day enjoyable and I’ll see you tomorrow.” Not waiting for her to say anything, he ended the call.

Ethan sat back in his chair in his office, rubbing the back of his neck. She’s pregnant…how did I not know this? Why has she never said anything? She must not be far along if she’s drinking so much coffee on a daily basis. I’ll need to watch her caffeine intake…wait, no, that’s Beckett’s job…right?

Ethan couldn’t shake the thought that he was missing something. It didn’t make sense that she’d be expecting a child with Beckett, yet flirt with him, touch him every chance she got, look at him with such intensity as though begging him to kiss her.

I’ve got to be missing something…but what?

Back at Beckett and Oriana’s house, Diana frowned at her now dark phone.

“Was that Dr. Ramsey?” Beckett asked hesitantly.

“Yes.”

“I couldn’t help but notice you didn’t say goodbye? But congratulations on solving your case.”

Diana shrugged, trying to hide the hurt she was feeling as she placed her phone back in her pocket. “I guess that’s all he needed. And no. Do not paint any medical signs in here, your kid doesn’t need that yet. Or possibly ever.”

She turned her attention back to her fluffy white cloud, signalling she didn’t want to talk about it any further. Ethan Ramsey is nothing if not confusing.

Tags: @annekebbphotography​ @gardeningourmet​ @zigortega4life​ @eileendannie​ @alesana45​ @thequeenofcronuts​ @friedherringclodthing​ @mfackenthal​ @coffeebeandragon​ @drakewalker04​

@feartheendlesssummer @elainew13 @the-soot-sprite@brightpinkpeppercorn @paisleylovergirl @dottie-minerva-mikas@emichelle @symonde @kendrasgue @pbmychoices @flyawayboo

@elles-choices @lilyofchoices @boneandfur @queen-among-writers @walkerismychoice​ @hopelessromantic1352​ @confessionsofabrokegirl​ @msjpuddleduck​ @desiree-0816​ @lapisreviewsstuff​ @sonsie0613 @universallypizzataco @perriewinklenerdie

[wizkiddx]

supercluster

this is my entry for @hollandsrecs 'toms birthday fanfic fest' event - go check it out!!! I know its a early but im v bored so have it now. also im acc kinda really proud of this one, any feedback would be v appreciated 🤍

the prompt was: 'you and tom are best friends and you tell him that you love him on his birthday'

summary: its toms birthday but he has a few things to get off his chest and into the night sky, y/n joins in with a bit of a revelation too

best friends -> lovers

warnings: mentions of alcohol, bit angsty but promise ends all fluffy and a shit tonne of dialogue

wc: 3.5k ishhh

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Everything got a little too wild and stuffy in the living area, Haz and Harry screaming sweet caroline, whilst Greg (Tom’s stunt man) was pouring *another* round of shots. The sweatiness and clamminess of the room meant Y/n took a moment to escape, sliding out the double doors, and closing them softly behind her to ensure no one would notice her little escape. Something about the midnight air, the slightly dewy smell of the neighbouring fields, felt like it was refreshing Y/n from the inside out. When she turned around, back facing the fancy rented house, she was slightly shocked by Tom standing in the garden. It was his birthday party after all. In all honesty, Y/n felt a bit guilty she hadn’t noticed he wasn’t in the thick of it with his brothers and castmates.

His silhouette was set against the clear night sky, the stars extra prominent this evening and the moon casting a soft glow off the left side of his face, exaggerating the natural contours of his jawline and cheekbones. Clearly, he was enraptured by the sky, staring up at it with a thoughtful look on his face.

And Y/n recognised that look instantly; she knew what he was doing.

In fact, he had taught her to do precisely the same thing. As kids, the Hollands, Y/n’s family and another two families from the local area all went camping together. It was an annual event, ‘the Kingston collective camping adventure’ as Dom had named it. Y/n couldn’t remember a year when they hadn’t gone actually - it was that much of a tradition.

One year, though, when she and Tom were about 9, her mothers’ due date coincided with the camping dates. So, sensibly, the decision had been made that Y/n and her brother would just be looked after by the Hollands - whilst her mum and dad were safely tucked up in bed at home, awaiting the arrival of her littlest brother.

Y/n, her brother Alex, and Tom were all sharing a tent, and it must’ve been at least midnight that Tom was awoken by shuffling and zipping up of the tent. He’d realised she was gone through sleepy eyes and, without a second thought, went to go find her. Sure enough, she wasn’t far away, not even 50 metres from the tent, crouched on the grass. Immediately Tom’s presence had been noticed, making Y/m quickly snivel and wipe her face.

“Are you upset?”

“Go away Tom.” The comment didn’t do a lot, though; instead, 9-year-old Tom had planted himself down next to her - his pyjamas getting wet on the moist grass floor.

“Are you missing Auntie Sarah and Uncle Mike?” In the same way that Y/n called Nikki and Dom auntie and uncle, the Holland boys mirrored the nicknames for her parents. Y/n replied with a long sigh before hiccuping, failing to control the stream of tears. Yes, he was right - this was her first night away from her parents- but she wasn't about to spill her heart out to the 'stupid boy' who had stolen one of her marshmallows that evening. Tom’s little brown eyes swelled, looking slightly terrified and out of his depth, whilst with all his 9 years of wisdom, trying to come up with an answer.

“Do you want to play football to forget about it?”

Unsurprisingly Y/n shook her head violently. Tom cursed inwardly at himself for saying the wrong thing, apparently football wasn't the answer to everything. The two children went back to silence until Tom had the metaphorical light bulb moment. “My mum told me something for when I got to sleepovers? Look!” He grabbed Y/n’s little hand, extending it upwards towards the night sky.

“No matter where you are, you’re all looking at the same stars too, right?”

Tom jumped a little before looking over his shoulder and recognising Y/n with the softest smile that grew across his face. Y/n slowly walked to his side, arms crossed over her chest to try and keep the cold at bay, joining Tom in staring up at the starry expanse.

“How do you always know?” Tom spoke in a breathy chuckle, shaking his head slightly. It was true, she did always know - but his question was somewhat irrelevant. They'd spent most their childhood together, they were as easy to read as a children’s book to each other.

“Missing home?”

“Sort of, I got my own slice of home with the boys and-and you but… pads, mum dad yeh, feel like on your birthday your always supposed to see your family.”

Although Harry, Harrison, Sam and Y/n had managed to fly out to surprise Tom on his birthday- prior commitments meant his parents and youngest brother hadn’t been able to make it. They four arrived yesterday, greeted by a very shocked and pretty emotional Tom - who had clearly been missing the sense of home somewhat. He’d been away shooting a film, then straight away launching into press for the next spiderman movie. It had been a long while since he’d been in London - half a year in fact.

This time too, he’d been away without a single family member or friend - that was another truth he’d learnt about growing up. Your friends and family, they all get lives of their own. Tom used to be a trailblazer, the first to get a job, the one everyone was super proud of. They still were, of course, but didn’t dote on him in quite the same way - everyone had their own shit to deal with. It was yet another reason Tom wasn’t welcoming his birthday as much as he usually would.

“Your parents did always spoil you rotten.”

“They spoilt you worst and you’re not technically their kid.” Y/n rolled her eyes, even if it might slightly true - muttering a ‘touche’ at the brown-haired boy next to her. Their families had always been close; naturally the adults seemed to gravitate more to the kids that weren’t their own. The ones who you could ‘give back’ at the end of the day. It just so happened Nikki and Dom had always loved having Y/n around, maybe a bit more than anyone else.

“Have you had a good birthday then? You should be in there with Greg pouring that shitty vodka down your throat.” Y/n questioned, whilst shrugging back toward the house, the dull thump of Jacob's playlist just audible. Still, both stared upwards, standing close enough that their upper arms were both pressed up against each other. She expected a jovial answer, but even from his tone, it was evident there was something up. He sounded…weary?

“I’m bloody glad you all came...don’t get me wrong, I love Z and Jacob and everyone but….”

“Shitty week?”

“Shitty birthday week of promo and press.” Tom scathed, and Y/n nodded. Even if she couldn’t understand what was so bad about press, she knew that Tom hated it passionately. And in the same way, he loved all his castmates dearly, but they hadn’t known him his whole life. They didn’t understand why he did every little thing; their values lay just that bit apart. It just wasn’t the same as being surrounded with his family - you and Harrison adopted Hollands too.

“I just feel like I’ve spent all week trapped in a room answering the most stupid, irrelevant and inconsequential questions... Everything’s just so surface level and fake and, and I-“He cut himself off, for the first time meeting Y/n’s eyes. In all honesty, Tom got a bit caught up in the stars reflecting off her piercing y/e/c eyes before changing tack.

“Will you do me a favour?”

This wasn’t spoken with the normal Tom tone. It wasn’t joking or jovial; it wasn’t an ‘off the tongue’ thing. This was spoken with such seriousness and gravitas coming from his deep voice that Y/n replied equally truthfully.

“Always T, you know that.”

“Will you please ask me a personal and serious and deep question?”

She got where he was coming from too.

Clearly, even though the evening was supposed to be a light piss up in celebration, it had instead unearthed some darker thoughts that Tom had been harbouring away. Perhaps he never even realised he needed such seriousness, or perhaps with his castmates he hadn’t felt comfortable exposing himself like that. Either way, Y/n was going to respect him now. It was technically his birthday, too; the clocks had already struck 12 - it was now his day.

It wasn’t tricky to think of one; she’d often wondered the same question of him - never with the opportunity to ask. The question popped into her head again, almost as soon as Tom asked for one.

“Okay…. What’s your deepest regret that makes you feel guilty for feeling because in the grand scheme of things, it minor? Like such a 'first world problem'." What do you regret that’s just completely selfish?”

Tom immediately stiffened, his jaw tensing as he worked through his thoughts in his head. Scared she’d pushed it too far, Y/n averted her gaze back to the sky, chewing her bottom lip slightly. It took a moment, but then she saw Tom turn towards her, in the peripheries of her vision. With a tightly closed-lip smirk on his face he joked “If your gonna ask questions like that, we better sit down.”

And so they did, both sitting crossed legged on the ground, knees brushing against each other. Just on the grass lawn, almost mirroring themselves all those years ago as kids in that camping site. Y/n wondered if she should offer to play football instead - to cheer him up.

“Missing out. I miss out months at a time. Miss out on seeing mum and dad, miss out on the pub quizzes with the boys, miss out seeing you… I mean, I didn’t even know you had a new job until you mentioned it this morning. I miss out on time with nana Tess and all my grandparents, and that’s scary cos… well, every time I go, it could be the last time… I don’t know, I just… I get so much, get to travel, to see the world, but… sometimes it feels like I’m sacrificing the foundations. And without the foundations….”

“The walls come crumbling down.” Y/n finished off his sentence quietly, barely whispering the words - but from Tom’s nod of agreement, it seemed like she’d hit the nail on the head. There was silence for a beat till Y/n whispered to him.

“Well, happy birthday to you” Trying to bring the mood up a little, she bumped his shoulder, and Tom chuckled breathily.

“Seriously! This is helping me out. I-I just need to get everything out and start my 25th year fresh.”

“Hey, if that’s all you want, I’m getting a refund on my present- we can just get deep and interview each other.”

“I’m game, except I’m keeping the present too.”

“Just because it’s your birthday and I’m a bit tipsy, I’ll allow it.”

“Okay, well then, Y/n L/n”, He spoke formally, leaning in closer and making her giggle a little. “What’s your biggest regret?”

“Honestly?” Tom just repeated her in reply, but this time it was a statement.

"Honestly."

He really was going deep too. No holding back now. Y/n sucked on her cheek before replying. “Not travelling with you when we were 19… I was just so determined to get to uni and start grown-up life, but… well, grown-up life isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I should’ve tried to stay a kid longer, messing about on your film sets and pretending it was work. I think I would’ve learnt more from seeing the world with you.”

“Well, I am very knowledgable.”

“Shut up, you drop out- who didn't know what a drag race was.” She wasn’t wrong, and whilst yes, he had dropped out to be a film star - he was still a dropout. (with exceptionally poor knowledge of RuPaul) He scowled, then leaning back on his hands, so he was half reclined on the grass as Y/n thought of her next question.

“Whats your biggest worry?”

“Easy.” He chuffed, making Y/n furrow her brows at him. Clearly, he’d already thought of this. “That I finally settle down with the love of my life, and then the fans or press or paps ruin it.”

It made sense; every time Tom had gone public with a relationship, it had ended in a minor car crash. Typically it was also the girl who got hurt; she was the ‘victim’ in everything. Though Y/n had seen first hand the effect it had had on Tom - he never made it out damage-free.

“You make it sound like you’ve already got this dream girl queued and waiting.”

“I wish”, Tom sighed, as Y/n took the opportunity to completely lie down on the grass, staring up at the dark abyss. She’d always loved the stars and had become a bit of a geek on them as they’d grown up too- and maybe it was all down to Tom on that camping trip. Following suit, Tom copied her, his head resting on his hands that were crossed behind his head, taking in the moment of pure peace as they lay on the grass.

“You see that bright one there?” Pointing up, Y/n shimmied closer to him so that he definitely saw the same thing as her. “It’s actually not one. Look closer.” Humming, Tom shifted a bit closer, so her shoulder slotted under the side of his body just the teeniest bit. It meant he could follow her direction and squinted up at the little patch of the sky.

“ 5…maybe 6? What is it?”

“The pliedes supercluster…. basically a big group of stars that all were born from the same place- the same stellar nursery.”

“But they’re moving now?” She hummed in confirmation to his question, briefly glancing at the way his eyes were fixed on the sky. For the first time he seemed genuinely interested in hearing her stories of the stars. It usually was an eye roll and ‘you’re so lame’.

“They’re called the sibling stars… like everything in life, as they get older they drift apart but…. but to us down here? They’ll always be associated together because they have a gravitational effect on each other. They’ll always have their thing tying them together. Like an invisible string.”

“Sounds like you’re being metaphorical.” Tom chuckled, expecting a taunt back but receiving nothing except a gentle agreement.

“Theres also actually 7. The last one people can only sometimes see… it’s a pulsing star, so comes and goes.”

“They do that?”

“Yeh, and no matter what… if you can see it or not, it’s always there. Always having an impact on its family.”

Biting his lower lip slightly, Tom repositioned his head slightly, Y/n’s words taking time to be fully absorbed. He was sure she was making parallels to him. Barely there, appearing and disappearing, but always a part of the family.

“You are being metaphorical.”

“Maybe.” She whispered shortly. “Metaphors depend on who’s listening and if they draw parallels to their own life. It’s subjective. You can’t tell anyone what is and isn’t metaphor…. it takes the beauty out of it.”

“Right, sure... But if you were…. me, harry, Sam, pads, you, Haz, Tuwaine? That the 7?” Y/n held back the little smile at his words. Tom wasn’t as ‘head in the clouds’ as she was- he was literal. Also, he was bloody stubborn when he wanted to be.

“I wasn’t being metaphorical T.” He knew she was lying. She knew that he knew. But it still helped him, made him feel a bit better. That he was always, in some way, having some effect... lives always intertwined with the people he cared about the most.

“Tell me another story about another star.”

Time for the rest of the night kind of got lost. The two young adults just lay on the grass, entirely in their own little world, using each others body heat to keep themselves warm through the early hours. Neither felt remotely tired, Y/n whispering her little stories of both the myths and science of the old stars, pointing out each planet. Meanwhile, Tom listened in awe, for once not taking the mick out of her incredibly geeky hobby. Instead, he found himself getting fascinated by all the little intricacies Y/n was so passionate about.

It was only when the stars began to fade, as orangey-red hue started to seep up from the horizon the either noticed the time. It was now the morning of the next day, the house long since had turned silent behind them - presumably, everyone finally passing out shit faced.

As the stars’ light was overtaken by the rising sun, Y/n ran out of stories; the two settled into silence - neither quite ready to go to bed yet.

“It’s still my turn,” Tom spoke into the sky before pivoting his head to look Y/n in the eye, seeing the confusion in her furrowed brows. “It’s my question to ask. My turn.”

“Aren’t you sick of my voice yet?” There was absolutely no reason that they were both whispering. It wasn’t like anyone was trying to listen or that they’d disturb anyone else my talking normally. But it was nicer that way. It felt calming... intimate even.

“One more. And then you get one more… and then we really should probably go to bed.” He didn’t want the night to end; he was immensely enjoying this weird grey time between being 25 and 26. But it was cold, Tom could tell Y/n had started to feel it a little more. To be fair, she was only in a floral day dress, not much in the way of warmth. With a hum of agreement, Y/n smiled lightly at him, urging his question.

“Whats the biggest secret you’ve kept from me?”

With a bit of a scoff, Y/n sighed and closed her eyes, trying to draw some strength she wasn’t sure she had. It wasn’t like she needed to wrack her brains to come up with it - she knew instantly. Almost painfully too.

“Uhm, honestly?” Now even more intrigued, Tom nodded, using his foot for nudge hers - encouraging her to speak. “Probably how much you mean to me.”

“Oh” He couldn’t help it; the sound just slipped out his mouth without checking with his brain first. That answer had just been so unexpected. He had honestly been thinking that it would be something about how ‘fame had changed him’. After hearing that, Y/n turned her head up the sky again, feeling like her cheeks were on fire with embarrassed heat. Tom knew he had fucked up.

“No, I… I didn’t mean- just just ask me too.” With a sigh, Y/n waved off his stumbled answer as he tried to cover himself.

“This is stup-“

“Ask me!” For the first time in 5 hours, Tom spoke at an normal volume - but it felt painfully loud, like a shout.

“What’s the biggest secret you kept from me?” Her tone was defeated, but nevertheless, he answered.

“How upset I was when you didn’t come when we were 19. I got why, but it was still annoying. Felt like you were picking uni friends over me-“ At this point on any other evening, Y/n would have interjected and argued. None of this situation was normal, though, so she chose to hear him out. “- I know it’s stupid, but…. I guess that’s how much you meant an-and still mean to me too.”

There was silence for a couple minutes, waiting whilst the sun started to peep over the horizon, the lone witness to an otherwise very private conversation. That was until Y/n barely spoke, more like mouthed 2 simple words.

“I lied.” The intensity of the way Tom stared at her made Y/n wish that the sun hadn’t been so bright, that they were back in the darkness that hid her face more. “Biggest lie I’ve told you … that I’m not in love with you.”

Y/n didn’t see because she couldn’t face looking at him, but Tom’s face erupted into the most prominent, toothiest smile. Whilst Tom was enjoying the moment of being absolutely ecstatic, Y/n was waiting for a response- feeling her world come crashing in. That she'd just destroyed one of the most important friendships in her life too.

But then he said the opposite of what she thought he would.

“I lied too.”

That had her attention, whipping her head toward him as Tom rolled onto his side on the lawn, balancing with his head resting on one hand. “I lied that I’ve not been completely under your spell since we were kids at that campsite, and you were homesick.”

Y/n’s heart was literally in her mouth, brain overwhelmed but one overriding thought oh so bloody clear.

She’d lost control of everything, arching up to mirror Tom. Using one hand, she reached out to cup Tom’s jaw, to which he instinctively leant toward - until their lips were mere centimetres apart, hot breath fanning over each other.

Y/n no control as she whispered those 3 words against his lips. No control at how immediately after he pressed his to hers; no control as Tom guided her to roll on top of him, knees either side of his torso as his strong arms wrapped around her back.

Once again, time was lost between the two, only pulling apart when their lungs burned for oxygen.

“For the record, I love you too.” Grinning from ear to ear, Tom used one hand to gently stroke his thumb across her cheek, switching his focus from her left to right eye - in wonder at how the early morning sun reflected from her y/e/c irises. He’d always thought she was beyond beautiful, but when she was this close to him, with the sun rising behind her in such a way - she looked damn ethereal.

“Happy birthday T.” Nodding in agreement, Tom chuckled before finding her lips once again, whispering against them.

“Yeh, happy damn birthday to me.”

~~~~let me know what you think ;) ~~~~~

tagging: @hallecarey1 @hollandfanficlove @crossyourpeter

[femmescooter]

2020 Wrapped:

thanks to my darling @ghostnebula for tagging me in this!! honoury mention for meeting you and so many other wonderful fuckers this year

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5-8 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome work!

1. together, or not at all (we’re not meant to survive this)

this was my fic for @bimmyshrug’s very fun Labor Day prompt collection and I seriously want to say that when I started writing fanfic this year, it was exactly the type of story I wanted to write. to sum up: this is a spooky, supernatural, short fic where the losers are all younger girls running feral in the woods playing witches. if stephen gets to vaguely project his childhood trauma on his characters, than so do I and I made them all baby lesbians

2. only the meek get pinched (on the cheek)

my very first fanfic I ever posted!! this is a teenage reddie fic which is just as sweet and fluffy as a marshmallow. vaguely based on ferris bueller’s day off, richie and bev are a couple nearing the end of high school who convince eddie to skip school with them for a day and go to portland. a lot of emotions, revelations and some incredibly sappy scenes result. it’s definitely got a special place in my heart!

3. et vitam aeternam

I am so proud of this but a little freaked out about actually posting it!! it’s a lesbian vampire/nun reddie fic and also the first smut fic I’ve ever written. it’s somewhat gothic (??) very kinky and blasphemous as hell. if you read it PLEASE HEED THE TAGS

4. my reddie playlist

sooo as a quarantine project I sorted my nebulous collection of IT songs into 6 categories, 2-10 options in each category on an excel spreadsheet. as an output of that, I made a whole bunch of more specific playlists and my reddie one is my favourite

5. my IT essay outline

I went a bit feral and wrote out a sourced critical essay outline for what I think are the central themes of the novel and how that works with the films. you can dm me for the link if you want but I don’t even remember half of what I wrote

6. my yearning lesbian reddie playlist

I lied this ones my favourite

2020 was shit but I can honestly say that starting to write fanfic for the first time was a high point, as well as meeting some wonderful friends 💕 it’s been lovely to get so much support and love as I started writing! happy 2021, fuckers

@sunnygaybitch @thatmalu @ull-float-too plus whoever wants to do this!

[jowritesthingss]

Excuse Me Sir This Is My Emotional Support Eldritch Being

Fandom: The Magnus Archives

Pairing(s): n/a

Rating: Teen (for swearing)

Content Warning(s): rabbits, food/drink, mild(ish) swearing, not!Sasha, eldritch beings, spoilers through early s3-ish

Length: 2,190 words

Brief Summary: The archival team adopts a rabbit. (Part one of the Emotional Support Eldritch AU!)

AO3 link in reblogs bc Tumblr is a biatch!

*

“What is it?”

Jon levels a suspicious glare down at the fluffy blob comfortably stretched out in the middle of the overstuffed break room couch.

Tim blinks owlishly at him from behind his mug of tea. “A...rabbit?”

“Yes, but are you sure it’s a rabbit?” Jon asks insistently. “Not a—a spirit, or...an animated doll, or a clown in disguise or something?”

Sighing, Tim sets his tea down on the counter. “Look, I get the whole ‘suspicious of us being murderers’ thing—no I don’t, actually, but that’s beside the point—it. is. a rabbit.” For a good measure, he walks over to sit on one side of the rabbit, reaching a hand out to the little guy’s fluffy head. If a rabbit could smile, he suspects this one would be doing so as it leans up into his hand.

“No fleas or ticks...or worms, so it’s not some Jane Prentiss Pet Sematary crossover, I promise—” Tim rolls his eyes, “—the veterinarian confirmed as much when I brought the poor thing in. Out of the mud and the rain of the gutter,” he adds, not even attempting to hide the guilt-trip. He wishes Martin were here, with his ridiculously effective puppy-dog eyes.

Tim knows this is Jon he’s talking to, but surely even he can’t be that cold-hearted. He rather thinks that Jon will enjoy not being alone anymore down here during all his late nights. If he’d let himself, surely Jon would enjoy having company in the form of a teeny tiny creature that can’t and won’t harm him—which, uh, certainly is not why he’s lying about his current flat not permitting pets, no siree.

“...Fine. Whatever.” Jon points an accusing finger at him. “But we’re not keeping it,” he stresses. “The moment you find it a different home, it goes. The moment.”

“Sure thing, boss,” Tim chirps, although as he begins a staring contest with the rabbit’s curious red eyes, he has no intention of actually doing as Jon says.

Martin chooses this moment to walk through the door. His eyes light up. “Aw, is that a rabbit?”

“No, this does not mean you’re allowed to bring in more strays,” Jon snaps.

The light in Martin’s eyes fades. “Okay,” he says mournfully as he crouches to pet the rabbit, sulking.

-

“So what should we name him?” Tim asks Jon when the Head Archivist comes into the break room the next morning.

“Oh—my—” Jon startles where he stands by the counter, attempting to make himself some toast with the Archive’s horrible fifteen-year-old toaster—toast that now splatters across the floor. Somehow in his sleep-deprived stupor he must’ve missed Tim sitting on the couch with a white rabbit on his head. He never seems to really notice Tim, but at this point it’s fine enough; Tim has accepted that the guy has impossibly poor taste.

The rabbit clambers down from Tim’s shoulders, jumping off of the couch and padding over to investigate the new human(?) and the mess he made.

“How about Thumper?” Tim puzzles aloud, stretching leisurely and acting as if he doesn’t notice Jon frantically scrubbing up raspberry jam and trying to avoid the rabbit’s investigative snuffles all in one. “No, no...that’s too cliché.”

“I really don’t see the point in naming it when it shouldn’t be here more than a few weeks,” Jon comments, shooing the animal in question away before it can try to lick up any jam.

“Maybe Joe?” Tim continues loudly, as if he hadn’t heard the other. When the rabbit ambles back over to him, he scoops them up, pressing their noses together. “Ligma?” He shakes his head at the rabbit. “No, no. We need to have more sophistication as we go about this.”

“You could do with applying that sophistication to your work,” comes the grumbled retort.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Jon abruptly turns to burn another piece of bread in the toaster.

-

“How about Marshmallow?”

“What on Earth—” Jon shrieks, jumping in his desk chair, and a sheaf of papers is sent flying around the office.

“The rabbit. Should we call him ‘Marshmallow’?” Tim smiles as innocently as he can manage, standing out in the hall with his head peeping into his boss’ office. “Marshie for short?”

“I am in the middle of a statement!” Jon sputters. “Get out!”

“Okay, okay....” Tim fluidly shrugs his shoulders. “What about ‘Bob’?”

“Out!”

But Tim continues to pop into Jon’s office unannounced throughout the day, tossing out name suggestions. He even manages to rope Martin into doing it too, and notes with savage delight that between the two of them and his work, Jon doesn’t get much more than a moment to wallow rest for the remainder of the day.

Between the two of them Tim and Martin manage to compile a surprisingly long list of names:

Snowball,

Posy (Martin is partial to this one because he thinks it’s cute),

Bungen Leitner,

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt (“is that too American of a reference for a fanfic taking place in the UK?” “what?” “what?”),

the Bunholding,

Michael (Jon is especially averse to that one for some reason),

Cottonball,

Fluffy Bastard (Tim’s own favorite),

Bugs Bunny,

Eldritch Horror (Tim tosses that one in as a joke; no way the rabbit that eats his own shit is some kind of otherworldly being),

Big Bungus (“it’s a play off Big Chungus!” “d’you seriously think anyone else here even knows what memes are”), and

the Vampiric Count Sir Maximillianus-Who-Is-Also-A-Werebun

(Despite badgering Sasha multiple times in an attempt to get her thoughts on the matter, the only name she offers up is “Dinner”, which makes Martin cry, so that one is out.)

None of the names quite seem to fit the little white puffball that has now taken over the realm of their break room, however—so Tim and Martin find themselves going back to the drawing board. They reluctantly leave the Institute at the end of the day, still without having decided upon a name.

-

“JON JUNIOR!” Martin screeches excitedly the next morning as they’re congregating once more in the break room, zombie-like before their tea and mid-morning snack time (primary schools don’t get all the fun, okay).

Jon and Sasha startle, and for once even Tim himself jumps. The rabbit doesn’t seem to care much where he is, nibbling at some hay in his corner litter box.

“I—what?” Jon asks, flabbergasted, although he manages to not drop his toast this time. Character development.

“We should name him Jon Jr! After you!” Martin explains eagerly.

“Absolutely not,” Jon tries to say, but before he can finish, Tim is jumping in.

“I think that is an excellent idea,” he says, grinning broadly. “Thoughts, Sasha?”

“I’m not emotionally invested in this.” Sasha shrugs, uncaring. “I’m going back to my desk.” She takes her drink and walks out of the room, letting the door slam shut behind her.

“All right, since Sasha doesn’t care, I’ll decide her vote for her,” Tim says, carefully containing his glee. “So that’s three votes for and one against, then. Majority rules.”

“What? No!” John protests, but Tim is too busy looking at the rabbit for confirmation.

“What do you think, little guy?” He walks over, bends down, and lightly boops the rabbit’s nose. “Are you a Jon Jr?”

The rabbit twitches his nose in agreement and poops.

“Well then!” Tim stands, clapping his hands together. “That’s been decided upon.”

No, it hasn’t,” Jon insists, but Tim cares little for his boss’ objections. He’ll accept his fate as Jon Senior eventually.

-

To Tim’s utter surprise and fascination, it happens sooner than later.

Jon, Tim quickly realizes, is a lot like the one dad who says “no dog” and then ends up loving the dog more than he loves his own children.

Despite his initial objections, the daft fool ends up getting caught up in Jon Jr’s big, innocent, rabbit-y gaze (worse than even Martin’s puppy-dog eyes, they conclude gravely), and by the end of the day Friday Jon has announced that he supposes the rabbit can stay with him over weekends and holidays.

“We’re still not keeping him,” Jon reminds them all, even as the rabbit gathered in his arms, giving his nose kisses and knocking his glasses askew, says otherwise.

He gets caught trying to sneak the rabbit into his office on more than one occasion, but Martin raises a fuss about it.

(“He’s all of ours! Jon Jr is our department’s mascot now,” Martin protests defiantly. “You can’t take him away from the rest of us.”

“Yeah,” Tim adds, mostly just to stir up drama—he doesn’t particularly care one way or another. “You can’t just swoop him up and file him away like one of your statements.”

“Just don’t let it get out and chew at my electronics,” Sasha says, distractedly typing something on her phone, probably to that weird new boyfriend.)

To stave off the imminent coup, Jon Jr becomes an officially-declared resident of the break room. He slowly amasses chub around his middle and a cardboard kingdom of bunny toys, houses, blankets, and treats. A rabbit could want for nothing more.

And perhaps—perhaps a human could want for nothing more, too, Tim thinks as he looks down at the figure curled up on the sofa, rabbit nestled against his chest.

He doesn’t love the man, not by a long, long shot—doesn’t even particularly like him half the time—but Tim can’t deny that the scene is adorable. And, regardless of his very vocal protests, Jon Jr may very well be what Jon Sr needs to finally process things and move the hell on with life.

Tim smiles grimly. It’s about damn time.

He quietly closes the door to the room and heads back towards the Archives. He’ll leave Jon to wake himself up.

(And to discover for himself that Jon Jr has peed on his pants leg.)

-

Of course, this is the Archive we’re talking about, so naturally the peace is abruptly shattered, and everything goes horribly, horribly wrong.

Tim isn’t entirely certain what happens or why, but all of a sudden Sasha isn’t really Sasha, and he and Jon have gotten backed up and cornered in the tunnels as this not-really-Sasha stalks towards them, predictably with the intent to kill, just like the rest of the spooks they are so lucky to deal with.

Tim and Jon Sr slowly back away until they hit a dead end. Meanwhile, Jon Jr licks at Tim’s arm—he’d been scooped up as they ran into the tunnels, Tim doesn’t entirely know why—and despite the fact that they are most probably about to, y’know, die, the little kisses almost feel strangely reassuring.

The thing-that-is-not-Sasha cackles, her—their?—its?—voice distorted and echoing throughout the tunnels. It stalks towards them.

All of a sudden, Jon Jr wriggles loose and leaps smoothly down onto the ground. He scampers in front of Tim and Jon, heading towards bitch-give-me-my-Sasha-back.

“No! Get back here!” Tim hisses at the rabbit, even though he knows it’s pointless. He hates to admit it, but he’s becoming rather fond of Jon Jr, even if Tim mostly brought him in to piss off and totally not help Jon. Jon—who, speaking of, seems to be equally fond now, judging by the deflating tire of a terrified squeak he makes, and the adorable immature grabby arms he makes at the little bugger.

“Junior,” Jon calls out, sounding like a toddler who’d just been told Santa wasn’t real (he is, they have the statements to prove it, he is). And Tim wants to laugh, albeit hysterically. The first time he sees his brick wall of a superior cry and it’s over a rabbit, and he’s not even going to have time to gloat over it because they’re about to die. “No! You’re going to—”

Jon Jr stops and sits in front of wholly-absolutely-totally-not-Sasha-what-the-fuck, who looks down at him, bemused through its murderous bloodlust.

The rabbit lifts a dainty paw up to his mouth, and suddenly—suddenly it’s twisting and huge, towering up to the ceiling of the tunnel, its skin hairless and tinted a sickly, glowing gray, with five, six, seven...a whole lot more limbs than a rabbit is supposed to have.

The not-rabbit unhinges its now meters-long jaw and snaps up the creature.

Tim and Jon stare at each other, wide-eyed.

There is a loud gulping sound, then a deafening crack, and suddenly there is a very normal white rabbit sitting in front of them again, carefully cleaning one paw with a very normal pink tongue.

“Wh—” Tim chokes on his own words.

The holy-shit-it-really-is-an-eldritch-horror-after-all stretches, yawns, and flops over in a dead sleep.

“...We’re keeping the rabbit,” Jon says faintly.

“I—yeah.” Tim nods, light-headed. “We’re keeping the rabbit.”

-

Jon Jr the rabbit-slash-eldritch-abomination gets a very hearty dinner of romaine lettuce, tomatoes, and cucumber peels that night.

-

(Tune in next time* for the terrible, terrible realization—“Jon Jr is a girl?!” (Also why is there another dead body again, dammit, can’t we go one week))

Fin

First || Next

*

(There may or may not actually be a next time. It depends. )

Behold. What very well may be the stupidest thing I have ever written. Ahem. Did I say stupidest? I meant most brilliant. Clearly I meant it’s the most brilliant thing I have ever written. Obviously.

Let me know if you enjoyed this! I have a bunch of ideas to continue this ridiculously silly AU of sorts, but idk if I’m going to quite yet and am not certain that I’ll be continuing to write for TMA. atm I’m focused on a different fandom, and I’m only on s3, so the really big idea I had has to wait, anyway.

Want to chat or be added onto any of my taglists? Shoot me an ask or a message here or via my other social media!

[miss-smrxtiee]

Fanfic Update!!

Hi my beautiful people! I thought I’d give some insight as to what’s happening with my writing!

As some of you may know, I’m not posting at fanfics until early & mid December. I’m participating in some events such as @choicesholidaygiftgrab @choicesficwriterscreations ‘#cfwcwinterseason & @teappreciationweek !

Today I finished yet another fanfic for Open Heart, and I’m now working on a few more! Thank you all for being patient with me!

As for The Elementalists, I am working on a bunch of those! I can’t wait to have them out soon!

Here’s some tag peeps

OPH

@angela8754 @drariellevalentine @rookie-ramsey @aylaramseycarrera @ohchoices @bratzlahela @anotherbeingsworld @rookieoh @fayeswiftie @openheartthot @monsoonblooms12 @lillylavander20 @aestheticartsx @starrystarrytrouble

TE

@warblerlo @fluffy-marshmallow-heart @harrington-sinclaire @kinkypot @herarmoredheart @thesaltycrustacean ?

Perms!

@lifeaskim @choicesstan1 @peaceinmidstofchaos @arcticrivers @oxjenayxo @gryffindordaughterofathena @drariellevalentine

BB

@otherworldlypresents @lauren-raines-x

[axwalker]

Drake fanfics

Hi! I wrote this post because I wanted to share some of my favorite fanfic writers. Notice that I’m a suuuper Drake Stan (if it wasn’t clear with my account’s name, he!) and I only read TRR fanfic because I haven’t played other books. 

I wrote my favorite series for each account, but all of their drabbles, one shots an other series are great too, I actually had a hard time just choosing one for each. I hope this is useful for all the Drake stans out there :) And if someone has other suggestions, don’t hesitate to share! 

@drakewalkerrosenberg: Whiskey (completed)

@livingthroughchoices: The Marshmallow chronicles (ongoing)

@drakeandcamilleofvaltoria: The history of us (completed)

@fluffy-marshmallow-heart: New beginnings (completed)

@andy-loves-corgis: Once upon a disaster (completed)

@burnsoslow: Heavier things (ongoing)

@fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore: The American Romance (completed, but she regularly adds somme one shots from the same universe)

@msjr0119: Cordonian wags (ongoing)

@of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld: Heritage (ongoing)

@star-spangled-eyes: Always faithful (ongoing)

@i-bloody-love-drake-walker: A change of hearts (ongoing)

@pug-bitch: That’s not why I’m going (First part completed, Second part ongoing)

@the-everlasting-dream: The revelation (ongoing)

@speedyoperarascalparty: Used to know (ongoing), and her three part halloween miniseries: Lovers of Applewood (completed)

@iplaydrake: Full Circle (ongoing)

@confessionsofabrokegirl: The jukebox series (completed)

@ooo-barff-ooo: Just kids (ongoing)

@likethetailofacomet: Learning to love again (completed)

@larryssunflower: Non-royal romance (ongoing)

@butindeed: Nameless (completed)

@choicessa: Begin again (completed)

@silviasutton1989 Old stuff (ongoing)

@angstymarshmallow: Frozen (completed)

@drakewalkerisreal: Amour sans fin (ongoing)

@mrswalkerwritesagain Decisions (completed))

@thequeenchoices: If things were different (completed)

@jovialyouthmusic: Charlotte choice/Uneasy lies the head (completed)

@flowerpowell: Second chances (completed)

@onehandsomedevil-trr: One handsome devil (ongoing)

@mind-reader1: Home away from home (completed)

@moonlightgem7:Come away with me (completed)

@debramcg1106: Looking for trouble (ongoing)

@blackwidow2721​: Lost and found (completed)

@takingcourage​: The start of forever (completed)

@walkerduchess​: A game of hearts (ongoing, just started but it seems great)

@drakewalkerwhipped​: Supposed to be series (completed) 

[peteywillproceed]

Ice Cream

Author’s Note: Helllloooooooo everybody! I just want to say I so appreciate all the love over the past few days, you’re all incredibly sweet! This was actually originally part of a longer fanfic I wrote a really long time ago, which I started playing around with again yestereday. I’m thinking of turning that one into a series, but for now I thought I’d post this! I’m sorry if it’s totally crappy lol, enjoy x

Summary: After breaking up with your boyfriend, you’re feeling completely miserable until your best friend pops round with ice cream. (because this used to be a part of a bigger fanfic, I changed up the ending a little bit to make it more fluffy :) )

Word Count: 1,999 (lol)

It was warm in the living room, an old re-run of Friends echoing softly from the TV screen as you drifted in and out of a hazy sleep. Your eyelids felt heavy and ached to close, but the stress of the day kept them from getting what they wanted. Your heart was filled with a painful sadness, and no amount of blankets, hot chocolate, and flashes of Joey Tribbiani’s face could keep you from remembering your boyfriend’s face just hours earlier.

Sure, you’d only been with Aaron a couple of months, but hearing him try to tell you he thought you were better off seeing other people still hurt like a bitch. Even worse, you thought today was going to be good for once – he was taking you to the beach, a day of reading and relaxing whilst the rarely seen English sun warmed your shoulders. And then he’d just come out with it, right there in the car park, when you’d been only inches from paradise and you’d just gotten out of the car and walked away. He hadn’t even bothered coming after you.

Suddenly, the front door to the flat slammed, jolting you from the sofa in shock. Heavy feet pounded against the carpet, belonging to the person you were so used to traipsing through the place so regularly you’d given him his own key. Voice still thick with sleep, you called out into the hall.

“Tom? Is that you?”

“Yep, darling, where are you?” he called back. You so desperately wanted to laugh as he walked into your cabinet and cursed, but you couldn’t find the energy in your heart.

“Living room,” you called back miserably, flopping back into the sofa. “If you can find me under the piles of blankets.”

“Huh?” His voice was filled with confusion “Y/n did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed again?”

Under normal circumstances, you would have laughed and thrown the pillow at his stupid head. But the thought of any kind of happy sound leaving your lips seemed to far away, and instead you ignored your best friend’s half-hearted attempts at a joke.

Suddenly, his head popped round the door frame, a big smile splashed across his face no doubt caused by some good day on set. When his eyes found yours, it slid away, and you hated causing him worry, the two familiar grooves appearing in his forehead when he saw what state you were in.

“Darling?” he inched towards you “what’s wrong?”

“Aaron broke up wiv me,” you mumbled against the pillow, choking back sobs.

“He what?” Tom frowned, leaning closer.

“I said he broke up with me!” You snapped, instantly feeling bad.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, sorry I snapped. It’s just been a really shit day.”

“Mmm, I bet,” Tom fell to the floor and crossed his legs, perching in front of your squished face and peeling the blanket back slightly from your tacky skin. “I thought you said he was taking you to the beach?”

“He was, he broke up with me in the car.”

“Asshole!”

“It’s arse hole, Thomas,” you rolled your eyes and he scoffed.

“It’ll be whatever I fucking want it to be the guy’s a twat – why did he think the car was a good place to do it?”

“I don’t know,” you whimpered, feeling the tears come racing back “I honestly don’t want to talk about it.”

Tom sighed, stroking your hair. “Oh darling.”

That was when you lost it, fresh tears streaming down your face and soaking the already sopping pillow. Huge, ugly sobs erupted from deep within your chest as you struggled to control your breathing, mentally urging yourself to get a grip. Sure, Tom had seen you a lot worse than this, but you’d only been with Aaron a few months, and you felt stupid reacting like this, like your life was entirely over.

It was just - it hurt.

It hurt so god damn fucking bad and there wasn’t a thing you could do about it.

You’d really liked him, and even now with Tom’s strong arms wrapped around your body, rubbing soothing circles into your back, you could still picture his face as he broke up with you. It seemed like you’d meant nothing to him in that moment, just an annoyance saved into his phone contacts that could be deleted without worry. And maybe that was what hurt the most, finding out that you were just another girl, and not the one like he had promised.

“You know, it’s gonna hurt like shit but it’s not the end,” Tom murmured into your hair, gently kissing the top of your head.

“I know that Tom I’m not psycho!”

“I know, darling, but it’s easy to start feeling like you mean nothing to them, and you have to remember that isn’t true.”

“Stop reading my mind, creep,” you choked out, a half strangled laugh that Tom seemed pleased to have gotten out of you.

“See? You’re still laughing, you’re still breathing, it’ll all be okay.” His fingers gently slid down your arm, interlacing with your fingers. It was probably the cold, but goosebumps quickly rose to the surface and sent tingling sensations through your nerves.

You went quiet, the only sound the strangled cry of your ragged breathing. For a few moments, you just stared at your interlocked fingers, tracing the way Tom’s massive hands curled around yours. He seemed distant, staring at the wall of your flat with a glassy look in his eyes. “Tom?” you asked, and he snapped his head to look at you.

“Yeah?”

“What are you thinking about?”

“You mean other than the fact I’m going to kill the shit head next time I see him?” He shook his head, tightening his grip in yours. “I dunno, just that it kills me not being able to fix this.”

“I don’t think it needs fixing,” you sighed “if he’s this much of an arse hole it’s better I find out now than ten years down the line when I have kids with him.”

“You wanted kids with him?” Tom’s sharp intake of breath startled you, and you looked at him like he was crazy.

“No, idiot, I was only with him for like three months. I was just making an analogy.”

“Oh. Right.” Tom nodded, pursing his lips and lightly brushing his fingers over your cheek. “Sorry, I just assumed you’d been together longer.”

“Why?” you raised an eyebrow. It wasn’t like you’d flaunted your relationship, but Tom had been with you all those nights in the club when you’d be drunk off your arse and flirting with every guy in the vicinity. He’d always been the one to pull you away, he should know you’d been single then.

He shrugged, fiddling with his fingers. “Oh, it’s nothing, just something Haz said a long time ago.” You frowned deeper and he seemed to notice your confusion. “Honestly, Y/n, it’s nothing. He just put something in my head he shouldn’t have done.”

You nodded, still not feeling any clearer, but you had enough to deal with without worrying about your best friend’s misinterpretations. Drawing a shaky breath, you squeezed his hand tighter. “Want some ice cream?”

“Is that what’s going to make this better for you?” Tom chuckled.

“Absolutely.”

You moved to stand up, stopping as he reached to grab your arm and pulled you back down. For the first time, you noticed he had a bag at his feet, and he leant down to fish around in it, reappearing with one massive tub of Ben and Jerry’s and two equally large spoons.

“How did you know?” You laughed, gobsmacked as he opened the pot.

“Well we were going to spend the evening together anyway and I figured it would be a hundred times better with ice cream!”

“Wow,” you muttered, diving in head first and mumbling through your first mouthful “this is so good!”

“Yeah? It’s…Fish Food?” Tom read the name off the box and you giggled at his confused expression.

“Phish Food, actually Thomas, but I’ll let you off.”

He rolled his eyes, jabbing his spoon in your direction and coating your nose in gooey marshmallow. With mock outrage, you countered the attack, smearing caramel over his cheek, and then it descended into chaos as he tried to get you back. You only stopped your little fight when a loud bang echoed through the flat, and you looked down and groaned at the sight of ice cream all over your carpet.

“Shit, Y/n, I’m so sorry!” Tom leapt to his feet, but you could hardly contain your laughter.

“Oh don’t be, it’s probably the least shit thing that’s happened today!”

Tom sighed, scooping the fallen ice cream back into the pot as you watched from your seat on the sofa. He seemed tired, broad back hunched over and face taught with tension. Suddenly, you had the overwhelming urge to reach out and smooth away the frown lines covering his face, and his head snapped up at your actions.

“Sorry,” you murmured, dropping your hand, but his eyes never left yours. Deep pools of chocolate stared at you, and you couldn’t pinpoint what you saw in them because it seemed like a thousand thoughts swirled inside them. At last, he reached out for your nose with your thumb, and swiped away the last remaining fleck of ice cream.

“You had some ice cream on you,” he smirked, and you rolled your eyes, catching his wrist in your hand. With a yank, you pulled him forwards more harshly than you intended to, and he had to brace himself against the sofa to stop him collapsing into you.

“Oops,” you grinned, heart fluttering a little, sending a wave of shock through you. Brushing it off, you wiped away the huge slather of creamy caramel covering his cheek and winked. “You had some ice cream on you, too.”

Tom pursed his lips, and you felt the burning sensation of his gaze as he traced it across your face. Your body suddenly ached to be closer to him, and you barely had time to wonder how you’d gone from miserable to vaguely horny in a matter of minutes. Your heart pounded in your chest as his eyes dropped to your lips, and you realised what was happening.

He was moving towards you, eyes fluttering closed and lips parting and in a millisecond more thoughts ran through your mind than they had ever done at any other point in your life. Were you ready for this? He was your best friend, what the hell did this even mean? Would it change anything? Of course it would, but how did you feel about that? Initially, you balked at the idea of kissing the guy you’d know for almost twenty years. But as he was moving closer to you the heat from his body began to course through yours, and you wondered just what those lips felt like.

Soft. Soft was the answer. And as they crashed into yours, the doubts you’d had melted away, as Tom slowly gathered you into his arms and kissed you more gently than anyone else had done in your life. It sent tingles racing to the tips of your fingers and flutters to your toes, the sensations overwhelming and overstimulating all at once.

But as you lost yourself in the kiss, you barely noticed the darkening sky outside or the tissues littering the floor from a day spent crying. Here, with Tom, none of that existed; maybe you would face the consequences later, but for now you were just enjoying the weight of his chest and the scent of vanilla on his skin. The way his lips moving in sync with yours and the sounds of his light breaths against your ear.

And as you broke apart, both panting and surprised, you bit your lip and licked away the taste of ice cream on your tongue, feeling lighter than you’d ever done before.

Taglist

@zabdisamor @jinxfanfics

[giddleford]

Broken Walls

Graham is unable to sleep and so over a mug of hot chocolate he manages to deepen his friendship with the Doctor.

Word Count: 2,088

Rating: G

Notes: I wrote this by hand while I was not paying attention to some lectures during the span of one day, it was bugging me, a lot, so I had to have it done. It’s also my first published fanfic which is, well, scary. To those who are fortunate to know the references, you will love them, to those who don’t, I hope you just enjoy it.

Thank you to the amazing @not-mandip for being my beta tester and helping me come up with the title. I wouldn’t have written this if you hadn’t invited me to your cursed chat, so thank you for that as well.

The TARDIS was quiet, only the usual white-nose remained. Graham had been exhausted, there had been way too much running in the last adventure and he no longer had the stamina. He was doing pretty good for his age, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t tired. As he lay in bed of his longtime claimed bedroom his muscles relaxed, leaving parts of him painfully sore. He’d have to ask the Doc for a calm adventure, thought Graham, he didn’t think he’d be able to move tomorrow. He tucked himself tighter and let his body relax even further, now feeling as if he was floating. He reckoned he’d be falling asleep soon, he was in warm and soft plaid pajamas with a blanket with a fluffy underside over him but yet he couldn’t. He might have been laying down but his mind was still running. 

The Doc had been particularly reckless, as if she didn’t care about her life anymore. She was never careless with the fam though, always making sure they were alright, almost like a mother hen, but with herself, well, then it was different. Graham had a vague idea of regeneration, he knew that Doc was hard to kill, but he was still worried. He was so sure he had something to do with that man, oh what’s his name, yes, right, the Master. While the rest of the fam was trying to make out who he was, Graham had been looking for answers in her expression. He remembered quite clearly, even though it had been a while ago. She was standing still, shocked, as if she’d seen a ghost. He’d never seen the Doc like that. He knew she was furious as well, her anger tended to be very subdued, boiling beneath the surface but raw and potent. And yet he couldn’t exactly make out why she was angry, they hadn’t been left for dead in a crashing plane at that particular moment, and all the Master had done was reveal his true identity. He wanted to ask her so many questions, and he tried, he really tried but she had been so shut off, pretending as if nothing happened, as if everything was all right. He knew it wasn’t, he had been through too many hardships to know the face of grief and she wore it almost daily. He had to ask her, he wanted to help, to understand, to be supportive but only if she’d let him. 

Gosh, he’d worry his head off, no, he wouldn’t fall asleep if he worried so much, but he couldn’t help it.

He tried to think about things that made him happy, like watching The Chase on TV and beating the chaser from his sofa at home. Trivia, he was good at that. But no, that didn’t make him truly happy it was just a distraction. He knew who made him happy but thinking about her still hurt, it was bittersweet. Her smile, her mind, all of her still made him all dopey, but this time that ache he got when he looked at her was tinted with grief. He tried to focus on the positive, all the memories that they made, all the laughs that they shared, all those quiet afternoons and those rare mornings where it was sunny and she would brighten the day even more. At least he had Yaz and Ryan, they had been next to him, supportive as always, and so was the Doc, as alien as she was. Now he thought about it she had been incredibly understanding, always showing support. From small touches to meaningful looks, to small worlds when they were alone, she had been all too familiar with his grief, as she had been there. 

Darn it, this wouldn’t do, he was worrying again. It was as if he couldn’t control his thinking.

He had to clear his mind, perhaps a good mug of hot chocolate would help, like the ones Grace used to do on lazy nights. That paired with anything that could distract him would be greatly appreciated. He could watch TV, he’d meaning to finish The Hour but never got around to do so, too distracted by the evergoing travelling. Or maybe he could read a book, any of them classics. Definitely cozy, to be seated in a fluffy bed with a hot chocolate in hand and a book in the other. He shifted his in his bed, a bit reluctant to leave it’s heavenly comfort. As he stood up he located his slippers by the side of his bed, he then moved to reach for his matching fluffy robe. Perhaps he was out of bed, but he wasn’t going to sacrifice comfort. He headed towards the kitchen, or more specifically, he started walking around the halls expecting to eventually find the entrance. It didn’t take him long to find it, just like it didn’t take him long to prepare a warm mug of hot chocolate. He put marshmallows in the dark beverage, immediately feeling nostalgic for that was Grace’s favorite part. She had a sweet tooth, she would never admit it though. Graham chuckled under his breath, she could be quite stubborn sometimes. He missed her, even a simple hot chocolate made his heart ache, but right now he needed a distraction, a story to lull him to sleep. 

He wandered through the halls again looking for his room. He had decided he’d watch TV, perhaps something new, something he hadn’t watched before, like Broadchurch, he’d heard very good reviews. He was decided, but he couldn’t find his room. The halls of the TARDIS we’re like a labyrinth, yes, but he was so sure it was around that corner, instead of finding in the console room. He retraced his steps, incredibly confused, perhaps if he found his way to the kitchen he could walk back to his room, but all he found was dead ends and other rooms. Eventually he found a very particular dead end, it had a mug of hot chocolate identical to his own inside a little compartment. It seemed like the TARDIS wanted him to grab it. He did, and when he turned around there no longer was a dead end, just a simple turn. He kept walking, he shouldn’t have gotten out of bed, he thought, but at least he had gotten distracted. When he came back from his thoughts he was standing right in front of the entrance of the console room. He had the urge to come in, and so he did, having long lost the interest to rationalize the situation. 

He admired the room, sipping on one of his mugs when he spotted the open TARDIS doors. Sitting on the ledge with views to a gorgeous orange planet was the Doctor. Graham knew she didn’t sleep, or at least she didn’t sleep when they did but he didn’t expect her to be there. He thought she’d be tinkering with a gadget, constructing something, doing repairs but she was sitting there, still, and that terrified him because he knew something was wrong. He approached her with caution, making sure not to startle her as he sat down next to her. He mentally cursed, sore muscles. He recognized her tears, the pain behind her eyes and it hurt him. Wordlessly he offered her one of the mugs, internally making sure that it wasn’t the one he had drank from. Her eyes softened at the action and Graham knew that was her way of saying thank you. They both drank from their mugs admiring the gorgeous planet, emotions under both of their skins. Graham knew this planet was significant, he knew that she’d be allowed him to see something important even if he didn’t understand it, and he also knew that she was restraining herself, not letting him see her vulnerability.

“It’s gorgeous Doc,” whispered Graham, truly in awe of the sight. The Doctor looked down, instinctively hiding her face and then she looked back up readying herself to speak.

“I know.”

There was a brief moment when they shared eye contact, and that was the oldest Graham had ever seen her eyes look. So many lives were hidden behind those eyes, so much pain, so much regret and it struck Graham if her eyes had always looked like that when she was alone. Cautiously, he started wording his next sentence, he knew that he was meant to ask her, that this was the moment he had been waiting for. He was going to show his support, his worry.

“Hey Doc, I’ve been told I talk about my emotions too much. I’m a bit of an old sap you know, but I’m afraid you talk about them too little. Look, you don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to, but we are worried about you. I know you’re hurting Doc, don’t know exactly why, but I’m here, we are all here in case you need us. That’s what friends are for.“ 

At hearing those words, the Doctor broke down her barriers. She was also tired, the last adventure also had taken a lot from her, but she would never admit it. Small tears ran down her cheeks and a sad smile painted her lips. It was bittersweet, Graham thought, it was a conflict between good memories and bad ones, she was experiencing grief and in that moment Graham hated that he was right. He never liked seeing his friends in pain.

“That’s my home planet, Gallifrey. For a long time I thought it was gone, destroyed in the war.”

“But it’s not really gone, is it?”

“No, I brought it back”

Graham tried to understand. He failed.

“I used to be so sure that the only way to win the war was to destroy Gallifrey. At some point I found another way, and I brought it back but I forgot. They let me wallow in grief and guilt, so when I remembered I was furious. I had been so alone.”

“What happened then?”

“My childhood friend came back, after I thought he had died.”

Graham searched inside his brain, could that be? Yes, it must have been.

“The Master?”

“I thought he had changed, but suddenly all the work I had gone through crumbled. All those people I saved from myself were massacred. Thousands of people, my whole species. I didn’t feel alone anymore, but that was taken away from me.”

He couldn’t help but admire her, that despite so much pain being ever so present she still managed to smile, she managed to bounce around with shining eyes, she managed to keep hope and to save people from injustice.

“I know grief all too well Doc. My sister, my parents, my young love Jack, my true love Grace, I always felt alone afterwards. But know this Doc, there’s always people who love you but you won’t get to know that if you don’t talk to them. I know this is hard for you, to open up and talk about emotions, so thank you.”

The Doctor looked at Graham and smiled. It filled Graham with a familiar warmth, and so he smiled back, pouring as much love into the little gesture as he could. They finished drinking their hot chocolate in silence, just enjoying the presence of each other. At some point their mugs were empty and Graham felt himself close to yawning, so with a quiet grunt he stood up.

“Here, let me get that,” said Graham as he reached for the Doctors mug.“ You know Doc? I think we’re due a quiet day, we’re all sore from all the running, or at least I am. I’ll be heading back now, get some shut-eye. You should rest too Doc, don’t want you running ragged.”

Just as he was about to leave the Doctor called him.

“Thank you, Graham. For everything.”

“Anytime Doc, anytime,” responded Graham with a warm smile.

As he was going back to his room, he realized how content he was. A pleasant warmth filled his chest. His worries had dampened and now he knew that the Doc could count on him as much as he counted in her. That’s what he meant when he said he barely knew anything about her, and he still didn’t, he had just seen the surface, but now they had a little connection, and it was a start, a very meaningful at that. Perhaps after all this he could finally go to sleep, he was pretty tired after all.

[brightpinkpeppercorn]

Ride or Die Appreciation  Week Fanfic Masterlist

Thank you to everyone who participated in RoDAW! Here is the complete list of all fanfics and head canons submitted during both the appreciation week and the epilogue day. There were over 140 works posted! Please take a look at all the incredible contributions!

Fic ratings will not be listed here. Please refer to the ratings on the individual fic pages.

@angstymarshmallow - Ruin You

@blackcatkita - Second Chances: Chapter 1

@brightpinkpeppercorn - Logan x MC NSFW Alphabet A-L // A Ficus in Gramercy Park

@client-327 - Five Wits

@choicesarehard - Pebbles

@choicesbyjade - Her First

@choicesluna - The Boy with the Car: Part 1 // The Boy with the Car: Part 2

@coltsforeverdriver - Mistake // Her Honesty

@darley1101 - After the Storm // Logan x Aly (a birthday to remember)

@debramcg1106 - Just Breathe // Just Breathe: Part 2 // Just Breathe: Part 3

@domesticatedantelope - Star-Crossed // Early to Bed

@endlessflame - Lost and Found

@flynnomalleys - Slipping Away

@hellospunkiebrewster - Backfire // Post Finale HC // Open Road

@justdani14 and @jlpplays1 - When the FBI Comes

@ladykateofhousebeaumont - The Pink Shirt // A Rainbow Disaster

@leelee10898 - To Drive or Not to Drive

@lilyofchoices - Dance Lessons // Wedding Crashers

@lizeboredom - The House Where Nobody Lived

@lolablackwrites - Roots

@lovehugsandcandy - The Best Presents are the Ones You Give Yourself

@luxurylives - Missing Pieces // Missing Pieces: Part 2 // Missing Pieces: Part 3

@omgjasminesimone - The Hot Exchange Student: Part 2 // The Hot Exchange Student: Part 3 // The Hot Exchange Student: Part 5 // Swimming

@princessstellaris - Lance // The Only Exception

@riseandshinelittleblossom - Message in a Bottle // A Port in the Storm

@scgdoeswhat - Mulholland Drive // L.O.G. Drabble

@thefirstcourtesan - Can’t Let You Go

@universallypizzataco - Photograph

@walkerismychoice - When I Touch You Like That

@zaffrenotes - Mixtapes and Milkshakes A-02 // Mixtapes and Milkshakes A-03 // Tiny Dancer // Yay or Nay

@akrenich - Attract

@anxious-arliah - Limits

@brightpinkpeppercorn - Kitchen Repairs

@client-327 - Depravity // Communion

@coltsforeverdriver - Reflection

@domesticatedantelope - Slow Burn // Early to Rise // An Exercise in Faith // Fluency

@endlesscressdarnel - Perfectly Wrong

@flowerpowell - The Fourth Time's the Charm?

@fluffy-marshmallow-heart - Prom Night

@hellospunkiebrewster - Shiny

@hufflepvnk - Until Next Time

@lady-dianelewis - I Spy (Part 13) // I Spy (Epilogue)

@ladykateofhousebeaumont - Stolen Secrets // Better Than Him // Facing the Truth // Truth or Dare

@leelee10898 - Or In This Case A Pony // The Flame

@lilyofchoices - A Study in Differences // Impatient // Just a Bonus // Date Night

@lizeboredom - Burn

@lolablackwrites - Keep Quiet // Finding You // Take Me To Church

@lovehugsandcandy - A Queen Stands By Her King // A King Adores His Queen // I Want This Shit Forever // Criminal Activity

@matsuoclan - We’ll Find Paradise

@omgjasminesimone - Benihanas

@scgdoeswhat - COLT

@tinypenguincheesemachine - Freewheel Burning

@thirtydiamonds - Holy Red

@twin-skltns - Chasing California // Here Tonight

@universallypizzataco - Apartment Hunting HCs

@zaffrenotes - Smack // Thwack

@thefirstcourtesan - His Love

@zaffrenotes - Veritas

@client-327 - Sapient 

@coltsforeverdriver - Secrets

@choices-betch - Strangers

@choicesarehard - Mona HC - Recruiting Logan

@hellospunkiebrewster - Blue Blood

@justdani14 and @jlpplays1 - Fallen Angels

@ladykateofhousebeaumont - Going Shopping // Gullible

@lolablackwrites - Homecoming

@kamilahmademedoit - The Talk

@noeschoices  - Mona HCs

@omgjasminesimone - Model Prisoner

@queenkaneko - The Cost of Freedom

@riseandshinelittleblossom - Fastest Girl in Town

@rocket-scientist07 - Thinking of You

@scgdoeswhat - MONA

@tallulahshh - Baby // This Side of Paradise

@teja-desai - Chasing Red

@blackcatkit - Get to Know My MC

@hellospunkiebrewster - HC

@ladykateofhousebeaumont - Facing the Truth

@lolablackwrites - Fade

@lovehugsandcandy - Hit Like You Love: Fast, Hard, and With Maximum Scarring

@omgjasminesimone - Honestly

@zaffrenotes - Prologue: Part 1 // Prologue: Part 2

@bubblygothzombie - Picture Perfect

@chompersandkatherine - NSFW Alphabet - Ximena x MC

@client-327 - Intruder Alert

@hellospunkiebrewster - Passing Lane

@ladykateofhousebeaumont - Lighthearted Angst

@lolablackwrites - Goodbye, New York

@omgjasminesimone - Seattle Pride

@am-i-invisible777 - MPC Plays Monopoly (MPC)

@choiceslife - Fast Cars (Brent Vandermeer)

@cora-nova - Cherries on Top (Teppei Kaneko)

@hellospunkiebrewster - Falling Off The Cliff (Jason Shaw)

@lilyofchoices - All In (Jason Shaw)

@lolablackwrites - The Dragon and The Phoenix (Teppei Kaneko)

@lovehugsandcandy - The Times I Tried to Love You (Teppei Kaneko)

@omgjasminesimone - Love (Meghan Shaw)

@omgjasminesimone - Movie Night (MPC)

@queerchoicesblog - Family, Somehow (Mona, Ximena)

@zaffrenotes​  - A Fruitful Endeavor  (MPC)

[fluffy-marshmallow-heart]

A Twist of Fate ch.31 -In Plain Sight

The Elementalists au

Beckett x MC (Oriana)

Words: 2512

Warnings: NSFW

Series Master List

Complete Master List

This AU is set after everyone graduates Penderghast, and Beckett and Oriana were never friends. Fate, however, may have a different plan for them.

  Beckett was officially at the lowest point in his life. He had cried himself to sleep on his couch the previous night. He couldn’t bring himself to go into the bedroom he’d shared with Oriana. In fact, now that she was gone, all he wanted to do was move out. He didn’t want to be reminded every second of every day of what he lost. He knows what he lost, and he knows he’ll never have it with anyone else.

He didn’t move the entire day. He didn’t sleep more, he didn’t eat, he didn’t drink anything. He ignored his friends’ texts. He tried calling Oriana’s phone again, and this time he received an automated message that her number was no longer in service. He hated himself for not being able to stop her darkness. He hated himself for letting her go. And he hated himself for waiting until it was too late to use the locator spell. All he’d done was respect her wishes, but now he was alone, with no hope at all.

He stared blankly at the tv, which wasn’t even on because he couldn’t stop his thoughts. He didn’t even want to. They were soulmates, they were connected in ways that couldn’t be explained. He could feel her love for him, could feel the way she longed for him. But she won’t go to him. She’s too afraid of hurting him again. If only she’d believe him when he says he’s not afraid of her. All he wants to do is be with her, and he’d do anything to get that back. He kept waiting for sleep, waiting for his own world to go dark…but sleep never came.

It was the same the following day. He hadn’t moved except to use the bathroom. As Sunday night rolled around, he let out a deep sigh, realizing he was supposed to work tomorrow. He wasn’t sure if he was actually going to go, he didn’t want to face anyone. But just in case…

I’m at least going to shower. Everything is always better after getting clean. My life may be a mess, but damn it, this I can control.

Stepping into the warm shower, his mind moved to how many times he’d made love to her in here, how many times he lathered soap suds all over her body and shampoo in her hair. He felt a stray tear slip down his face, and he washed it away angrily.

How could she do this? How could she do this to me? To herself? To us?

Feeling angry now, he finished up and stepped out of the shower, quickly towel drying himself and getting a good look at himself in the mirror. He’d lost weight, there were dark circles under his red rimmed eyes…He looked exactly the way he felt. The only thing missing from view was the giant hole where his heart had been, and where it had been ripped out by the love of his life.

He shook his head. Pull yourself together. You’re Beckett Harrington. You can handle this. You’ve never taken a sick day in your life, and you’re not going to start now.

Finally entering his bedroom, he tried to ignore the overwhelming loneliness of the quiet house. Not bothering with any clothing, he crawled into his bed, immediately rolling to Oriana’s side and smushing his face into her pillow to breathe in what was left of her scent. What he got though, was something hard and pointy.

What the hell??

He pulled back and finally saw it. He saw the one thing of Oriana’s that she’d left behind. He gingerly picked up the sparkling engagement ring, his heart thundering.

How didn’t I see this before?

He thought back to when he’d been searching for Oriana’s things…he’d searched the closets, dressers, the laundry, and under the bed…but he’d never looked at the bed. The ring wasn’t in a box, it had just been sitting on the pillow, blending in with the silver satin sheets. He hadn’t turned the lights on, nor had he slept in this room.

I’m such an idiot! I can’t believe it!! My answer has been right here, in plain sight, this whole time!!!

He was kicking himself for not being more thorough. Any other man would be devastated if their fiancé left her engagement band behind…but not Beckett. This is how he’ll find her. The ring was made specifically for her, ever since he went into the jewelry store, it had always belonged to her. This was better than any of her clothing or other jewelry. This ring was something that should have connected them for the rest of their lives. And it still could. He quickly said the spell…and immediately saw flashes of scenery! He was both crying and laughing at the same time as he hurriedly threw on whatever clothes were closest to him, ran down the stairs, out the door, and into his car. He drove slowly as to allow himself to feel the directions the ring was pulling him in…and finally arrived at a plain looking hotel. His heart beating frantically, the ring led him straight to a door. Beckett took a deep breath…and knocked. A minute later, the door slowly opened.

Oriana stood in the doorway, gaping at the man in front of her. “Beckett? What are you doing here? How are you here?”

“Can I come in?” He asked, his heart pounding.

She hesitated, then gave a slight nod, opening the door for him to slip through. He looked around the small space. “This is where you’ve been this whole time?”

“Why are you here?” She repeated, her face giving nothing away.

He turned back to face the girl he loves more than life itself. “I’m here for you. I’d like to bring you home.”

She stared at him a moment. “No…”

“Oriana, I love you. I love you so much. You are my sun, my moon, my stars, my entire universe. I love you. I don’t want to live without you. We belong together, you know we do. Stop shutting me out.”

She swallowed, hard. “I hurt you. I’m a danger to you.” She whispered.

Beckett shook his head vehemently. “That’s not true. I understand you’re scared. I understand you think you don’t deserve anything good, but you’re wrong.”

He took a step closer to her. She didn’t move. “Ori…I think you need me as much as I need you. I think you love me as much as I love you.” He paused a moment, shutting his eyes a brief second before reopening them and smiling warmly at her.

“I don’t think. I know you feel this way. I know you love me. I know you want to be with me.” He took another step.

“I feel you.” He added. “You can’t tell me that doesn’t mean something. I thought you were gone forever until…” He showed her the engagement ring. “You left this behind. But it’s yours, it’s always been yours. The connection of this ring? It’s stronger than anything. It led me straight to you.”

He could see the tears welling in her eyes, watched her take a shuddery breath. “You weren’t supposed to use the locator spell.” She whispered.

He was about to speak again when he heard something. A fast bumping sound. He furrowed his eyebrows.

“What’s that noise?”

She looked at him in confusion. “What noise?”

“That thumping. You don’t hear that? It’s muffled, but it’s there.”

She shook her head slowly. “I don’t hear anything.”

He stood perfectly still a minute but didn’t hear anything more. Maybe he imagined it…but then a small wave of nausea rolled over him. Realization dawned on him. His widened eyes dropped to her stomach. “You haven’t been feeling well.”

“No, I have this weird stomach bug I can’t seem to shake. It’s really sucked all my energy out. I’ve never felt so…weak and tired.” She grimaced. “But you’ve been sick too, we probably both caught it at the same time.”

Beckett shook his head. “No…no, I’m…I’m not sick, Ori, but…neither are you. Wow, it never occurred to me that…” He swallowed hard.

“You’re not weak.” He murmured, closing the distance and placing one hand on her stomach and the other around her waist.

She frowned. “What, are you trying to cure me? I’m fine.”

He looked back into her eyes. She doesn’t even know. How can I tell if she can’t?

“Why are you looking at me like that?” She asked.

Beckett answered by kissing her, wrapping her fully in his arms. She stiffened at first…but then melted into it. Their lips and tongues danced, and he picked her up, carrying her to the bed. Setting her down, he quickly pulled off her shirt, noticing for the first time it was actually his shirt. She unzipped his maroon hoodie, pushing it off his shoulders before grabbing the hem of his grey t-shirt and pulling it off. His breath caught in his throat as she unbuckled his belt, sliding his jeans and briefs down over his hips, kissing him like she needed his kisses to survive.

He worked his pants off before removing hers as she pulled him on top of her. “I missed you.” He gasped, already completely breathless. Oriana didn’t say a word, just positioned him so his tip was pressing against her hole, giving a nod before he went any further, He pressed slowly inside her tightness, basking in the warm silkiness of her wrapped around his cock.

“Oh, god, Ori…you feel incredible. Oh god, I missed this so much.” He grunted as picked up the pace, thrusting inside her again and again, trailing kisses along her neck, jaw, and lips, watching her intently as she bucked her hips to meet his rhythm, the pressure building between them until they finally exploded together, her slick juices coating his cock as his hot seed spread in her abdomen. The biggest turn on of his life was knowing that at some point, he’d already impregnated her. She had his baby in her stomach, and he couldn’t wait to meet the newest addition to their family, even just by ultrasound. They panted, coming down from their joined high, Beckett planting more kisses on her lips, her cheeks, her nose, her forehead…then moved south, kissing her chest, her breasts, the space between her breasts, and she moaned quietly as he did. But he’d finally arrived at his destination…her stomach. His kissed her skin there so tenderly before pressing his cheek against it, wanting desperately to feel their child, but knowing it was far too soon. He had no idea how he’d heard that heartbeat for just that second…but a second was all it took.

“Beckett.” Oriana said softly. “You’re amazing, and I miss you, and this was incredible but…” She trailed off uncertainly.

He pulled himself back up, so he could meet her eyes again. “Ori, I didn’t come here to make love to you. I came here because I love you. And I’m not leaving unless you come with me. If you want to stay here, then I’m staying too. You don’t get to decide what’s best for me. Besides, you should know that you’re what’s best for me. I came here because I’m going to put your engagement ring back on your finger.”

She opened her mouth to speak, but he shook his head, cutting her off. “When you opened that door, I fell in love with you all over again, and as we talked I realized why you’ve been so sick.”

She gave him a strange look, and he bit his lip, trying to figure out how to word it that wouldn’t make her run.

“You really don’t know why?” He asked slowly, testing the waters.

“I assumed it was you.” She responded. “It comes and goes, I figured it was just the connection wavering at times…” She paused, thinking, before a small gasp escaped her. “Oh, my god. No, that…no that can’t be, I’m on birth control, there’s no way you could’ve…could you? Could I be…?”

Oriana’s hand flew to her mouth in shock, her other one moving to her belly.

“We’re pregnant.” Beckett whispered with a grin. He was hoping for a smile back, but instead she frowned, pushing him away and sitting up.

“You want me back because you think I’m pregnant.” She stated, her expression turning hard. “You would stay here because you think this child is yours and it will bring us together? It’s not because you love me. You love this…this thing inside me. If it’s even there! I’ve been under a lot of stress, Beckett, I’m sure I’m not actually pregnant. I made myself think I was pregnant before and it was the worst thing that ever happened to me!”

Beckett tried to cup her face in his hands, but she shook out of them angrily. “That’s why you wanted to find me. You think I’m pregnant.”

His eyes widened. “What? How can you even say that? First of all, I don’t think, I know. But I didn’t know until I was already here. It had never occurred to me that’s why I was feeling randomly ill!”

She rolled her eyes, turning away, but Beckett grabbed her hand and held it to his chest. “Oriana…you know that isn’t true. You can feel my love for you. This past week has been hell on earth, and this? My heart? It’s broken without you.”

He brought her hand back down, taking the other one in his other hand, turning them both lightly over and rubbing her wrists with his thumbs.

“You used to have scars here. They disappeared when I kissed them that night, the first night we made love. You said only pure and true love could do that, you made it that way because you thought no one ever loved you. You said I must have loved you a long time if I was able to do that.”

A tear trickled down her face as she looked away.

“So do you see Ori, why your accusation that I’m only here for the baby doesn’t quite make sense.” He gently wiped her tears away.

“I want you and I love you. But I want and love this child too. Our child. The child we made out of unconditional love. You’re going to be the best mother, and I’m honestly so excited to witness it.”

He could feel her resolve to be angry and distant break as Oriana sniffled and laughed lightly. “God, you’re such a sap.”

He grinned. “But I’m your sap.”

“Yes.” She nodded. “Yes, you are my sap.”

“Come home.” He urged.

Oriana took a shuddery breath. “On one condition. You put that ring back on my finger.”

Beckett grabbed the diamond ring from where he’d set it down, then sank to his knees in front of her. “Oriana Miller, will you still marry me?”

“We’re naked.”

“Ori!” He laughed.

She shrugged, her eyes watery, her face lit up and eyes golden. “Absolutely.”

  @annekebbphotography @gardeningourmet @zigortega4life @eileendannie @thequeenofcronuts @drakewalkerfantasy @friedherringclodthing @coffeebeandragon @drakewalker04 @jlpplays1 @desiree-0816 @alesana45 @mfackenthal

@xo-endlessmayhem-xo @endlessly-searching-for-you @rissah @damienswhore @giulia2372 @nerdynstoned @wickedgypsymoon @the-writerly-night-owl  

@aworldoffandoms @cordoniasmost @syltti78

@feartheendlesssummer @elainew13 @the-soot-sprite @paisleylovergirl @dottie-minerva-mikas @emichelle @kendrasgue @pbmychoices @flyawayboo @divergentofhogwarts @sonsie0613 @brightpinkpeppercorn @symonde

[drakewalkerfantasy]

Flames of yesterday: Chapter 8

Summary: 5 years ago they made a mistake. They were two broken men drinking away their love life issues, and one girl trying to help a friend. What the night leaves them with are two broken hearts and one nearly broken friendship. 5 years later, two are still broken and another one fixed. But what happens when they all meet again? Will it open old wounds and bring all the their insecurities rushing back?  Or will it mend the two hearts still looking for warmth, unable to find it after their parting?

Words: 3406

Authors notes: A crossover of Open Heart and the Elementalists, a collaboration series by @drakewalkerfantasy and @fluffy-marshmallow-heart

Ethan x OH MC (Diana)

Beckett x TE MC (Oriana)

**Warnings: mention of death, panic attack**

After finishing their coffee, Ethan, Beckett, and Diana headed back to the hospital in silence, ready to each go to their posts. Reaching their destination Ethan stopped for a moment at the entrance. His deep blue eyes meet Diana’s before shifting to Beckett nodding to him shortly.

“Thank you for the invitation. I know that I may not be the preferred company, but…” started Ethan making Beckett stifle a laugh before Diana poked him lightly in the ribs.

“It was our pleasure.” Diana spoke eagerly. “Also, if not for you I would never have discovered this new espresso drink. It was delicious.” She smiled.

“I’m glad you like it.” Ethan’s throat dried out and his eyes following the tip of Diana’s tongue on her lip making him gulp audibly. “I… I need to go,” He mumbled, feeling how the last restraints were leaving him when her teeth dig into her lower lip chewing on it. He rushed inside losing himself in the crowd.

“See you later, Beckett.” Diana turned to go inside, but Beckett stopped her.

“Di, do you have a minute?”

She rose an eyebrow. “You know that your surgery will start in about twenty minutes.”

“I know. I just wanted to make sure that you are okay.”

“Of course, I am.” Diana said in a small voice, smiling weakly before taking a deep breath and turning around toward the elevator again.

Beckett blocked her path. “I know that every time you’re reminded of your mother you are not okay. I just want you to know that I’m here for you. You know this, right?”

“I do. You’re like a brother to me.” She paused before adding, “And this is why I need your support with Ethan.”

“And I’m trying. I really am, Di”

“Thank you,” She said gratefully before heading toward elevator, leaving Beckett behind her, and wondering where Ethan made off to.

She didn’t see him for several hours, but it was just as well as she couldn’t concentrate one bit. Beckett was right, she wasn’t fine. Anytime anyone asks her why she wanted to be a doctor or anything about her family it dredged up nothing but sadness for her. She didn’t think people would care why she decided to go into medicine. In fact, she usually just told people that she wanted to solve mysteries, which, wasn’t technically a lie. The fact that Beckett came right out and told Ethan that someone close to them had died…she wanted to both slap him and hug him at the same time.

Late that afternoon, she was walking into her patient’s room, and to her surprise, Ethan was there.

“Where have you been” He snapped

“What are you doing here?” Diana’s eyes were wide, she had no idea Ethan was treating this patient.

“Are you both my doctors?” The little boy in the hospital bed asked in a small voice.

Diana immediately noticed how tired he looked, and how thin he was even under a heavy blanket. His mother looks exhausted.

“Yes, sweetie, let them take a look at you.”

“This is Tommy Liu. His mother Sharon brought him in.” Ethan informed.

Diana nodded. “I see here in the chart that Tommy had been hospitalized two weeks ago and was prescribed antibiotics.”

Sharon dug in her purse. “That’s right. I have the name of it here in my purse…Azithromycin. He had bacterial pneumonia. The antibiotics made him feel better for a while, but now everything’s so much worse.”

“Tell her about my angry tummy.” Tommy told her.

“Right. He’s been getting these stomach pains…and he keeps wanting to vomit, but then nothing comes up.”

As Sharon keeps speaking, Diana began chewing on her bottom lip. She’s completely lost in her head. Sharon looks so tired from worry…I remember feeling that tired. And Tommy is so fragile…my mom looked just like that. It’s like the roles were reversed. And here…we also don’t know how to fix what’s wrong with him.

“Doctor Haynes? What do you think?” The mother’s voice cut through her thoughts, and Diana snapped her head back up. Oh fuck, she was talking this whole time??

She debated internally on what to say, finally deciding to just go with the truth, or as close as she can get. “I’m sorry Mrs. Liu. I was distracted, thinking about my last patient.”

Or my mom. Fucking Beckett had to mention her. Why couldn’t he have just lied to Ethan in the café?

Ethan gaped at her. “Seriously?”

“But I promise you that Tommy has my full attention now. Would you please repeat that last part? I want to make sure I have all the information”

She could feel Ethan’s eyes boring into her, felt his anger at her. She bit her lip, hard, beginning to feel like she couldn’t breathe.

Sharon was frowning. “Oh, okay. Thank you for being honest I guess. I was saying that all of Tommy’s friends are in shorts and t-shirts, and he’s been shivering non-stop. I’ve had to put him in his winter clothes, no matter how warm it is.”

Diana took a deep breath, before smiling at the child. “Hey, Tommy, would you like to do a cool science experiment with me?”

“Yeah!” He said excitedly.

“First, we need to get a tiny bit of your blood.” Diana explained.

His mouth fell open. “My blood? Are you a vampire? That’s so cool!”

As she draws a sample from Tommy’s arm, his mother strokes his head softly. “Do you have any idea what’s wrong with him?”

Diana met her eyes. “Based on the symptoms, it’s most likely something he ate.”

“But we don’t know that.” Ethan interjected, almost snarling.

Diana turned to him with fury in her eyes. “I think it’s safe to say that something got into his system where it doesn’t belong and is wreaking havoc, wouldn’t you?”

“No. I think you’re making assumptions, doctor.” He returned.

“We’ll be back with the results.” Diana assured the mother, then her and Ethan walked out of the room with the sample.

Together they brought Tommy’s blood draw to the lab, and then as soon as they were out of earshot Ethan rounded on her.

“What was that, Rookie?”

She swallowed hard. “What do you mean?”

He narrowed his eyes. “I mean you weren’t even paying attention in there. Not to mention you were several minutes behind schedule. I thought caffeine was supposed to help so you wouldn’t keep dragging your feet. Did I waste my time grabbing a coffee with you?”

Diana felt the surge of emotion. “I…I didn’t mean to, it was just…”

“No excuses.” Ethan growled. “You’re supposed to be a doctor. Yet you can’t seem to follow a schedule, you aren’t listening to your patients. Do you even know what it means to be a doctor? It means putting your own drama away. It means you put yourself on the back-burner and to put care more for these patients than your own personal needs. Whatever happened after I left you and Dr. Harrington, you should have also left it at the door. No one has any time for your selfishness. That little boy could die because you assumedit’s food poisoning. It’s careless, selfish, and I should take you off the case. It’s an embarrassment to this hospital.”

He glared at her, knowing full well he’s out of line, but unable to stop himself from saying the harsh words. “Perhaps I was wrong about your capabilities here.”

Diana felt a lump form in her throat and she gulped back tears, her eyes meeting Ethan’s for a split second before averting them again, trying to hide the hurt she was feeling. She could swear that she saw a flash of worry in his eyes, but she pushed this thought away, not allowing herself to think about it; not letting the hope enter her system, that he actually did care about her.

Seeing her unable to even make eye contact, Ethan tried to reach for her hand, but she instantly jerked it away, still not looking at him, making his eyebrows furrow. He wasn’t used to her shutting him out like this, usually she was quite cheerful and was the one reaching for him. She’s not even one to back down from an argument…and she’s not even fighting me on this. Something’s terribly wrong, he can feel it, how the guilt of his words were already eating away at him, and he desperately wants to take them back.

“Dr. Ramsey, I apologize. I don’t know what got into me, but I promise this will never happen again. So, as you rightly noted I should go and do my work. Now if you’ll excuse me….” Diana said dully, feeling the need to get away from him, feeling how her pain was crashing toward her with the speed of lightning. The thoughts began roaring inside her mind, panic rising in her, and she helplessly tried to bring her walls back up, not letting him see her pain. She was furious with herself for letting them down around him in the first place. If she’d just kept them up, like Beckett had told her to, this wouldn’t be happening.

Sharply turning away from Ethan, Diana went down the corridor not allowing the tears that were forming in her eyes to run down her face. With her heart pounding she realized this was futile, and she found herself almost running toward the first door she could find. Closing the door behind her, she was left alone in the solitude of the dark space, barely registering where she was, finally letting the tears flow freely. Leaning against a wall she slides down to the floor, covering her face with her hands. Her quiet sobs were the only thing breaking the silence and the memories flooding her mind. She’d thought they were securely buried deep inside, far behind her walls. And now… now these walls cracked for that man, and all her feelings, all her memories rushed at her with a power of a wrecked train. Her heart was shrinking in pain as today brought too many bad memories, too many tormented feelings she needed to hide.

She stood alone near the grave, tears flowing down her face, clouding her vision. Everyone left a moment before, waiting for her to join them for a memorial service… But she couldn’t leave, feeling like everything she had and loved was ripped out from her. Five years…. Five years of not knowing what is wrong…  Five years from one hospital to another… Five years of misery and tears, until the day they finally found out what was wrong with her mother all this time… unfortunately too late to be treated… unfortunately too late to be saved. And now… her mother is laying here cold, with only her close friends and family standing by the grave till the end. The quiet sob left Diana’s throat and she covered it with her hand, trying to be strong. Trying not to let feelings of despair overtake her. She clenched her fists so strong that her knuckles turned white and her nails broke the soft skin on her palms making it to bleed. She failed to see or hear anything around her, too deep in her thoughts to notice… too deep in her grief to care…

Her memories were drowning her, surrounding her from all angles. She could feel how the panic started to crawl up, digging its claws into her. Her hands were clenching into fists, her nails go deep in her skin, breaking it as she’d done so many years prior. She’s vaguely aware of her breathing becoming shallow and difficult. She shut her eyes tightly, trying to calm down but failing miserably, failing to notice that someone entered the supply closet she chose for hiding. Like through a fog, she felt a pair of warm hands tentatively taking hers, feeling safer and calmer from the touch. Her memory bringing her once again to the last time she cried this hard and the last person who calmed her as simple as this. To the time when a promise between two friends was made, a promise that brought her to this moment.

She didn’t hear him approach, but she felt his presence near to her. His shoulder brushing hers and his hand slipping into hers. His quiet voice reaching into the deepest corners of her soul, calming her down. Seeing through all the walls she started to build, trying to hide behind them. Beckett wasn’t giving her a chance to shut him out. Both were looking straight in front of them to the grave, full of resolve to keep the promise they made to try and prevent someone else from losing someone who meant so much to them.

She could practically hear his voice calling for her… Breaking through the sea of memories, slowly bringing her to the present.

“Diana… Diana…” She could hear someone calling her name quietly, trying not to startle her. But it wasn’t the voice she was expecting. The voice was soft, the fingers gently brushing hers, releasing the tension in her hands, skimming along the fresh cuts in her palms.

“Open your eyes and breath…” The man murmured, watching as she reluctantly opened her eyes, but her gaze still downcast, still fuzzy around the edges, still struggling to breath.

“Diana, look at me… please… just look at me and copy my breathing.” He continued, his voice quiet and gentle, both calm and calming. She finally raised her puffy eyes to meet his ocean blue one’s, her breath catching once more, realizing it was Ethan and not Beckett in front of her. She gulped for air as he spoke again.

“In and out… in and out. Slowly, just like this,” he breathed, demonstrating a deep breath in his abdomen, counting to four before releasing. He tightened his grip on her hands, watching how her breath started to slow down, trying to match her breathing pattern to his, their eyes locked on each other.

“Ethan…?” she eventually breathed out, still feeling his hands on hers, the outside world muted for a while leaving just two of them in this moment.

Ethan was shocked when he opened the door to the room she’d gone in, he had a feeling she hadn’t even known where she was going when she fled from him. As soon as he opened the door he heard the cries, heard the laboured breathing, saw the shaking figure sitting on the floor.

His voice was laced with emotions when he started to speak. He felt awful, knowing he was part of why she was crying like this. His voice was soft and quiet, his eyes locked with hers.

“I’m sorry…You didn’t deserve that. I know there’s no excuse for what I said to you. I was completely out of line. I don’t know what got into me,” spoke Ethan, his hand cupping Diana’s cheek, his thumb brushing her tears away.

Another lie, he thought gloomily. The only thing that got into me was jealousy.

He was kicking himself for leaving her all those years ago. He knew they had something special, but he was too crushed to fully see it. By him leaving that hotel room, he basically gave her to Beckett.But sometimes…the way she looks at him, finds ways to touch him…it makes him want to crash his lips to hers and take her breath away, to kiss her so hard she forgets everything around her…including Beckett.

He inhaled sharply, abruptly stopping his train of thoughts, his voice ringing again in the quietness of the supply closet. “I know you care about your patients. This is one of the qualities that makes me believe you will become a great doctor… the best one. And this is why I admire you and chose you for this program. Because I saw it in your application…the passion, the determination, the love. And I see that every time you work with your patients, not brushing them off but trying to get to know them, really listening to them. This, among other qualities, make you the great doctor. I had no right to tell you otherwise and I’m sorry for this.”

Diana stared at him a moment, debating on what to say. “Then why did you say it? You said I don’t care about anyone other than myself. Why? If you supposedly know I’m such a caring person?”

He shook his head slightly. “I was being irrational. I can see something has caused you to have an off day. We all have them, even me.” He chuckled lightly, trying to lighten the mood, but again he was met with a blank stare. He cleared his throat.

“Please accept my apology.”

Diana shakily removed her hands from his, glancing down at the cuts and frowning. A moment later Ethan was bandaging them, his hands firm yet gentle. “Now I know why you like to hang out in supply closets.”

Despite herself, Diana cracked a small smile. “There’s a method to my madness.”

Ethan shook his head. “I don’t see any madness. I really do apologize, Di.”

She rose an eyebrow. “You almost never call me ‘Di.’”

He shrugged. “We spend enough time together, I think I can call you that. Is…that alright?”

She nodded slowly. “Thank you.” She said as he finished with the bandages, letting him help her to her feet.

“I think it best you take the remainder of the day off. Go home, get some rest.”

“But what about Tommy?”

“Give me your phone number, I’ll let you know what I discover.” Ethan froze at what he just said. Technically he could get her phone number from the directory…but instead he asked for it, like a school boy with a crush.

Diana blinked. “Oh…okay…”

Ethan took out the small notepad and pen that he always carried in the pocket of his white coat, holding them out to Diana. She took them tentatively, brushing her fingers against his, feeling the crackle of electricity between them. She hastily wrote down her phone number.

“We’ll speak later then, Dr. Ramsey.” She opened the door and slipped out before Ethan caught her arm and turned her back to him.

“Please. Call me Ethan.”

“Bye, Ethan.” Diana whispered, heading straight for the locker room to grab her things, having no idea what the hell happened today. But somehow she knows…there’s been a turning point in their relationship.

Ethan watched as Diana walked away from him again, except this time she wasn’t in a hurry, she didn’t have tears in her eyes, and she wasn’t angry. He eyes the way her hips sway as she walks, and he had the desire to go run after her, take her home, make all her worries go away. Instead he closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and walked the other direction, not noticing that someone staring in their direction.

Beckett had just gotten out of a long surgery and he was wiped…but also exhilarated. There’s no feeling like the one he gets when he’s in the sterile room with the bright lights. Everything makes sense in there. There’s procedures to follow. He glanced at the nurse’s station but instead his eyes found Diana and Ethan coming out of a supply closet. His eyebrows furrowed. What the hell were they doing in there?

He watched silently as Diana strode away from him, saw the way Ethan watched her leave. Beckett sighed warily as a minute later Ethan turned and went the opposite direction of his friend. He could see the worry lines creased on Ethan’s forehead as he rubbed the back of his neck and kept turning to glance in the direction Diana had gone. It was obvious to Beckett that he was debating going after her.

When he didn’t, Beckett headed after her. He went into the locker room, where he was sure she was…but all her stuff was gone. He frowned, realizing Ethan must have sent her home for some reason…and Beckett knew exactly what that reason was.

“I knew she wasn’t okay.” He muttered as he went back to the station. A minute later, Ethan came back into his view, and Beckett saw the worried expression was still on his face. He wonders how much Diana told him. He groaned inwardly as Oriana’s voice involuntarily sounded in his head.

“I told you so.”

Tags: @annekebbphotography​ @gardeningourmet​ @zigortega4life​ @eileendannie​ @alesana45​ @thequeenofcronuts​ @friedherringclodthing​ @mfackenthal​ @coffeebeandragon​ @drakewalker04​

@feartheendlesssummer @elainew13 @the-soot-sprite @brightpinkpeppercorn @paisleylovergirl @dottie-minerva-mikas @emichelle @symonde @kendrasgue @pbmychoices @flyawayboo

@elles-choices @lilyofchoices @boneandfur @queen-among-writers @walkerismychoice​ @hopelessromantic1352​ @confessionsofabrokegirl​ @msjpuddleduck​ @desiree-0816​ @lapisreviewsstuff​

[heartcravings]

do you have any fun fic recs? thanks

Hi anonie!! ❤I haven’t been reading a lot lately, but here my current on going fanfics:. Midnight Hours by @marshmallow-phd — it’s part of The Untamed series, the exo wolf au and this time it’s about Sehun finding a mate. I’m loving all the sass in it so so much! Pretty much all The Untamed series are a good mix of fluff and angst, with tons of quirky bits [i haven’t read all of her other works but i recommend them all: good writting, funny, fluffy, angsty, it’s got it all!]. Exo Customs a collaboration by @ninibears-erigom-fics @suhoerections @kimjongdaely @kyungseokie @kpop---scenarios @fairyyeols @yeoldontknow @mint-yooxgi and @baekwell--tart— basically exo is a sort of underground gang involved in illegal racing, drugs and all those dark alluring things. Each of these amazing writers tell us the story of one of the boys. I haven’t read the most recent updates, but all the stories seem really good so far! I’m super hooked on it! Jongin, Chanyeol, Yixing, Kyungsoo and Baekhyun’s stories are so deep and twisted, oof, i just couldn’t stop reading!! And then Jongdae’s is a mix of fluff with that what the f*ck is happening here!? Minseok and Junmyeon are more composed at least in the beginning but i’m sure the darkness is gonna come soon. Sehun’s story i think hasn’t premiered yet, but i can’t wait to be honest! [it’s got a lot of mature and violent content too; so make sure you read their warnings before diving in too it]

. Dichotomy by @kyungseokie — a love triangle between the reader, Beakhyun and Junmyeon. This has got heartbreak written all over it, but i still risked my poor heart. I will never be content with whatever y/n chooses because have you seen the other one? Dia is out to hurt us and we will let her i suppose. It’s angsty and fluffy and so so good! [it has smut but to be honest all that remains in my head is how well she describes the mind and heart of people! Really really good!]So, that’s about it. Here’s a link to another post i made recommending fics in case you want to check those out and my fanfic tag is: sam’s favourite fanfics (just search it on my blog in case i’m forgetting some ^^) love,sam