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#first of all *intj stares at you*
mex-sickos · 1 year
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Honestly the worst part about the o movie (not putting any respect on his name) is that now my incredibly niche and batshit hatred of that little bitch is a topic people seriously want to debate me about
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justsomerandomfanfic · 6 months
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Hi! Can I get a Supernatural matchup?
- My Pronouns are she/her.
- Currently a university student majoring in clinical mental health (considering switching to art rn).
- I'm an artist, writer, and musician.
- I'm an INTJ and I'm a rather big fan of having my own personal time to decompress.
- I have a more detached social style so I'm considered "hard to get to know" sometimes because I'm not super social.
- I spend my time painting, playing piano, playing video games, or doing my own personal research.
- I enjoy going to literature events like poetry readings, and I also enjoy going to art shows.
- I go to oil painting seminars regularly and have my own personal collection of fine art and poetry.
- I'm an avid player of Dungeons and Dragons (I'm a massive Baldur's Gate fan) and my favorite thing about it is making up character backstories and doing art of my characters.
- I enjoy the aesthetic of tattoos and plan on getting a sword on my sternum.
- My love language is quality time/parallel play. I enjoy doing my own thing while someone else does their thing.
- I enjoy civil debates and going to theatre. I enjoy going to musicals and plays.
- My favorite musicians are Hozier, Type O Negative, Flora Cash, Florence and the Machine, Lord Huron, and Metallica.
- My favorite books are Crime and Punishment, Dracula, Pride and Prejudice, and The Strange Tale of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
- I'm a big fan of snacks and snacking and I keep a (large) bag of pretzels and a redbull in my tote bag.
- My family calls me a Renaissance reincarnation because of my varied interests.
(I have a preference for male/masculine presenting characters)
Hello! Here's your SPN matchup! I hope you like it! <333333
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(Romantic);
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Supernatural;
Castiel:
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🐝 Who knew that already being friends with Dean and Sam would lead you to meeting Castiel - you had known the boys for probably more than a year, and then you finally get to know the man behind all of the funny bee stories; though you are not too social with new people/people in general, Cas is the same, so you both go slow and slowly warm up to each other
🐝 Once you both get used to each other, it's not long until you become good friends - Cas sometimes get caught staring at you by Sam and Dean, and when he goes to them for help on these new feelings he's having, Sam gives him advice; near the end of the seven months of being friends, Cas gifts you the First Edition of Pride and Prejudice
🐝 Skipping to when you both are official, you and Cas spend some quality time together - when you're not in college studying or when you are not busy in general; you often bring Cas to the poetry readings or go to art shows - and when not out and about together, you both paint or just eat a ton of snacks while listening to music (my money says he likes Hozier too)
🐝 If you need time alone to decompress, Cas totally understands, he'll find something else to in the meantime, maybe go find some bees...
🐝 Cas loves learning more about you, your favorite snacks, hobbies, movies, and so on, he could spend hours just learning how to play D&D just so he could play with you or have a conversation with you about it; he loves how passionate you are in the things that you like, and how kind and understanding you are once he got to know you - he just massively adores you in general
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mbtiinteractions · 1 year
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How to win against two skilled opponents...
*ISTJ, INTJ and INTP found a three-man chess board and planned a little, friendly match.*
*five minutes before they start :*
INTP *thinking* : Hmm... it must be like 2 years since I last played chess... ISTJ practices every week at his chess club, and INTJ is always like 10 moves ahead... it seems I have no chance to win.
*INTP examines the rule book*
Rule : The match ends when a player is checkmated, and the player who checkmated wins the game : therefore, when a player A gets the better of a player B, it is more advantageous for the third player C to prevent player A from checkmating player B.
INTP : ...I have an idea !
*a bit later, the three of them got together to play*
ISTJ : So... none of us has ever played a three-man chess match, we should read the rules.
INTP *lying, with an innocent look* : Oh, I’ve read it but... sorry, I think I’ve lost the booklet...
INTJ *mumbles* : As usual...
INTP : But it’s no big deal, I remember all of them !
*explains the rules correctly, except for the last one :*
INTP : ... and finally, when a player is checkmated, the two others play against each other, like a normal chess match, until one of them wins.
ISTJ : OK, it doesn’t seem complicated.
INTJ *staring suspiciously at INTP* : Hmmm...I don’t know if I should believe you, but... OK, so let’s start.
*the match takes place : INTJ, as usual, plays both aggressively and cautiously, methodically gaining ground on the other two players – especially INTP, in whom he sees a chaotic adversary, capable of baffling his meticulous plans. ISTJ stays very careful, taking care not to lose too many major pieces and avoiding traps, taking absolutely no risks. INTP... somehow survives, focusing on attacking INTJ and defending against the rare initiatives taken by ISTJ.*
*after a while, ISTJ, who kept the most pieces (most of them still practically unused, since he almost only defended against INTJ), decides to help a very weakened INTP to get rid of the still very dangerous INTJ. With his last two major pieces, INTP manages to checkmate INTJ.*
ISTJ : So ! Now, we play one against the other, INTP !
INTP : Yup... but, oh, wait, what is this ?
*INTP pulls the rule booklet out of her pocket*
INTP : Oh, I made a mistake, the booklet says that the player who checkmated first wins the game ! Sooooo....
INTJ *with clenched teeth*: ... you won, you moron...
INTP *with a huge innocent smile* : Yup !
ISTJ : ... I’ll never play with you again...
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yomogi-mogi-mochi · 2 years
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Pygmalion (III)
Pairings: Rook/(Pygmalion) MC// Idia/MC (Platonic)
Summary: You were frequently told that your career as a renowned sculptor did not match your dull and less than colorful personality. With your cybernetic hands, you carve the lives and deaths of those long gone‒ producing pieces which have been held in both technical and emotional high regard, dubbing you with the title “Pygm.AI.lion” despite your human heart and brain. When you accidentally still the usually flamboyant archer into silence after he comes across you working in your atelier‒ you find that you’ve become a victim to one of his ceaseless stalkings. Though, you’ve been prey long enough to know how hunt the huntsman himself.
Notes: Sorry this took as long as it did lmao I was sleep deprived then I was in 2 separate 18 hour (what were supposed to be) naps lol. Ah the human body and its wonders.
Was revisiting Paradise Lost recently and I was like wait did I accidentally create Jesus and or Lucifer imagery????? Omg. I also posted a Lilia/Reader oneshot based on the myth of Dullahan (Beloved Thy Name) ao3 link is here / tumblr link.
A lot of philosophy stuff again because I am unfortunately an INTJ with a type 5w4 enneagram AND a Sagittarius (Rook, Idia, and I have the same sign lmao) so triple whammy I love intellectualizing everything. Another very very sweet ol slow burn but I swear romance is in the air
Enjoy! Comments, reblogs, and likes cherished as always (о´∀`о)
CW: Nothing much
AO3 Link Here.
Masterlist
Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 (Here) // Part 4 // Part 5 // Part 6
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Rook felt a bit feverish after that critique‒ his eyes swimming as they traced the image of your sculpture inside his mind, melting slowly into the painting of clarity he had been scrutinizing more of lately. Slowly, he gathered his camera and his picture‒ searching for the points you had brought up in your critique, before staggering to his locker in the art classroom, mindlessly sauntering into the hallways for his lunch period.
"You feel it, as it feels you." He couldn't help but to echo those words in your chest, with the clarity in your voice. That was what he had searched for more than anything‒ lucidity, precision, truth above all. And you had embodied its beauty in your sharp expression that gazed far beyond that clock, time, far far beyond anything‒ piercing those eyes through his picture, through his eyes with that arctic solidity. He felt so raw in your presence, even with the layers of fabricated kindness and dramatized passion that veiled his soul‒ protected it‒ you had managed to cut him open, seeing straight through his frantic, aimless fervor in an instant. It made him restless, he knew something inside him was urging with every fiber of its being, to chase and hunt it down‒ but that would mean bursting through, shattering the picture of clarity, of truth inside his mind that he loved dearly. No, it was something different than love, something greedy, the putrid scent of humanity.
He was so lost in thought, turning that clear picture in his mind over and over‒ seeing the blemishes that kept appearing with each interaction he encountered with you‒ that he smashed right into something solid.
"-You! Watch your‒ oh. Rook."
He tiredly gazed from the brim of his hat to see Vil’s face, twisted in slight concern. His lips quickly fashioned into a smile.
“Ah, roi de poison, apologies‒ I was lost in thought.” Vil continued to stare with narrowed eyes as Rook set down his lunch on the table, settling into his usual seat across from him.
"Did something happen today? This is…unlike you. It’s a bit unsettling." The dorm leader stabbed the colorful salad in front of him, bringing it to his lips. “If you need to retire early and skip the club meeting today, just tell me.”
“Non, non. Nothing to worry about kindest Vil. I was simply pondering how well the rehearsal was going to go today‒ are you not curious to how our cast will do on its first run through? I’ve been quivering with excitement to see the freshmen flourish!” With an excitable inflection cast onto his voice, Rook knew Vil would drop the question, sighing with feigned weariness, before engaging in friendly fire.
“There’s nothing to be excited about. It’s just some first year potatoes we have to whip into shape. Honestly, I’m getting tired thinking about it.” Vil said with that sigh Rook anticipated. The corner of his lips curled further, happy for moments of simplicity like this in the spiral of uncertainty you were pushing him into.
“That is what you have me for, roi de poison. And it’ll be fun to see the potential of these first years‒ I trust your instinct with these things.”
“Hm. It’s difficult to actualize the image I have in my head for them. These freshmen are too weak willed‒ but I’ll have to manage with what we’ve got.”
Rook hummed happily, glad that he could retreat into Le chasseur d’amour for just a while, carefully constructing his elation, and the smile on his face. Control, clarity‒ then truth came to him once more, shrouding him in an air of suffocating security.
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You felt your joints whirring a bit from how swiftly you had been walking from the art studio to the cafeteria. These old knees, you thought, choosing a box of pomegranate juice from the vending machine, they’re not what they used to be.
“(Name)! Over here!”
Spotting a flaming blue head, raising his hand to beckon you over‒ you drifted towards the table consisting of mostly Heartslabyul students.
“Hello Ortho.” You scuffed the fire on his head, drinking the tart juice from the box in your hands. “Looks good, did Idia install a digestion program in you?” You towered over his lunch tray, glancing at the steaming vegetables and tender meat. You did miss eating once in a while, but you found it to be rather a chore than anything else, disturbing your work flow whenever your stomach growled during the period of your life when you still had a human digestion system. Besides, Dr.Krios had deemed it unnecessary, instead pouring his efforts into your Orpheus protocol and transferring your soul without the demerits of your magic.
“Yeah! Human food is as good as I remember. I can have big brother install one for you if you’d like?”
You shrugged. “No need, like I said, I’m getting too old for big repairs or updates like that.” The creaking in your knees still remained. “Are these your friends, little flame?”
The two young Heartslabyul students stared at the two of you in curiosity, listening in on your conversation. “Oh, (Name), this is Ace and Deuce. They’re the same first years as me‒ and Ace, Deuce, this is (Name), a transfer at our very own Ignihyde dorm!”
“Nice to meet you! I’m Ace Trappola, the smarter and more handsome of us two.” The redhead reached his hand towards you with a crooked grin, while the first year next to him sent a questionable glare. You shook it, the metal inside your skin rattling a bit when you did. “Whoa! Are you a robot or something like Ortho?? You were talking about updates n’ stuff and your arm is so heavy!”
You released the grip on your arm, feeling the weight of your own arm‒ was it that heavy from your human one? The increased strength allowed by the automation made it difficult to tell. “I am not a robot. A cyborg.”
“Ace‒ stop being so rude! Sorry about him, I’m Deuce, it’s nice to meet you.” You took the hand of the other student with blue-black hair, quietly seeing if you could feel the heaviness of your hand in his shake. He had a surprisingly strong grip and steady arm however, so it proved useless.
“Nice to meet you two. Thank you for taking care of Ortho.”
“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s your relationship between the two of you? You seem like you knew each other before you even transferred‒ are you another Shroud sibling?” Ace asked with a fist under his chin in contemplation.
“Ah no‒“
“What’s this? Do I hear something about another Shroud sibling?” Another, taller redhead popped his head into your view, which you stared down in silence. “Wait‒ no way! Aren’t you Pygm.AI.lion? I follow you on Magicam!”
Ace snapped his fingers, pointing it at your face. “Ahh! I remember thanks to Carter now! I thought I’ve seen you somewhere!”
“…Magicam?” Must be another piece of modern technology you weren’t caught up with. So much was happening these days, you wanted to live your life simply without having to be caught up with every little thing on this planet.
“Huh? Yeah‒ see?” He shoved his phone in your face, scrolling through a page with the account name “Pygm.AI.lion”. You definitely don’t recognize this page, nor do you remember making a ‘“Magicam” account‒ so you suspected this was the doing of Jupiter Enterprises, another money hungry attempt, using you to gather the funds to pay for the research on your own body, to further blot research conducted by the desperate scientists at S.T.Y.X. You hoped Idia would take over too put an end to the ceaseless testing. “You should totally follow me back and be friends! Since we’re in the same grade and all~”
“Ah, I don’t actually own this account. Probably my manager or someone else at Jupiter Enterprises. But those are my works, and that is indeed me‒ I’m just not too acquainted with social media.” There were various pictures of you next to your sculptures, wearing the same dulled expression you always adorned during tiring galas and gallery events. Had you known they were taking pictures, you definitely would have deepened your frown just to spite them. But you figured with the tech they had been rapidly producing over the years, it wouldn’t be hard to implant a camera in corners you couldn’t see‒ just as small and precise as the ones implanted in your eyes.
“Oh that’s too bad. But we can still be friends, can’t we? I’m Carter Diamond, third year and official sweetheart of the Heartslabyul dorm!” Though he sung that sentence with a carefree lightness in his voice, you could feel his eyes shifting at your stony expression, searching for your response. Mood maker was right, you observed‒ the movement in his eyes reminded you of Rook a bit‒ except it seemed like he was using that wit to read the room rather than letting the hunger in his eyes consume him. You shook the thought of that feathered stalker from your mind, taking the hand Carter reached out to you.
“Nice to meet you too. I’m (Name), I just transferred.”
“Oh? Where did you transfer from RSA? I have a few friends there‒ maybe they know you?”
“Not from another school‒ a black carriage arrived at the S.T.Y.X lab one day, and I found myself here like the rest of the students. So I guess less of a transfer, but I’m not sure what else to call it.”
“Whoa S.T.Y.X? Aren’t they super secretive or something? Wait‒ S.T.Y.X is the one that made you then?”
“They did make my cybernetic enhancements. But I still have my human heart and brain, so depending on how you see it I suppose you could or couldn’t say they made me.”
“Wow I’m really getting the inside scoop here!” He laughed “They totally framed you as a robot‒ even in your Magicam profile! Oh‒“ He glanced at his phone. “I godda get going early to make up a test‒ I’m already on thin ice with Trein‒ nice to meet you Pygm.AI.lion!” Waving his hand, he dashed towards the double doors of the cafeteria.
You turned back to Ortho, taking the last sips of your Pomegranate juice. “That reminds me, Ortho. Are there any Art Clubs or Robotics Clubs here? Headmage said I had to join something by the end of the week.”
“Hm…I’m not finding either of those in the school’s database…But the science club is the “anything” club‒ you can join that! Or…” He tapped his chin. “Oh! You can come with me to the film studies club today! We’re actually in need of set designers and Vil would be grateful for a S-class sculptor like you, (Name)! And you can watch me perform today‒ it’s our first rehearsal!”
“Hm, that seems entertaining. It’s been centuries since I’ve seen a play in person. I look forward to your performance, Ortho.”
Ace and Deuce exchanged surprised looks, before the redhead spoke. “Uh..D-did we hear you correctly? Centuries..? How old are you exactly?”
Ah, right. The whole time thing. That thought left a distaste in your mouth, reminded of the clocks that had descended its image upon you today. All those around you were experiencing life at a different pace, all at different points in their path towards a blissful rest you would never know. The arms on your clock moved languidly, much too large to function “the correct way” that clocks ought to‒ in accordance to the beat of the human heart. Your body felt like that weary clock‒ much too tall, much too heavy for the way your heart would reach out to the pulse of other humans, and sink into the brilliant, cindering explosion that was a human’s lifespan. That blazing light you held at multiple points in your life was all too bright, too much, blistering against your brittle body that was weighed with eternity‒ so you took it into your hands, burning, imbuing it into hard marble. Even with your magic, that fire was too wonderful to be able to be ignited properly once more‒ dying out into a swift smoke when you craved that warmth again‒ leaving you cold, and dark. So you tried to let the turbulent waves of eternity wash over you, hoping it would eventually wear you down into nothing‒ a crude mimicry of a dazzling, human death.
“It..” You stopped, counting the centuries on your hands, but heaviness in your head made memories virtually irretrievable. “It’s been about six-hundred years, I think. I stopped counting a while ago, but I can give you a proper number with a history textbook. I was born exactly a hundred years before the City of Flowers was named.” You felt a little bad that you had stunned all those at the table to silence, quietly wishing Carter was here to pick up the mood.
“…You’re from the Shaftlands?” Deuce asked, breaking the awkward stillness.
You imagined your hometown, but you couldn't recall what it looked like, who your neighbors were, the smells, the dishes, the festivals. But your memory had not failed you when retrieving the memory of that night Dr.Krios found you, the smell of alcohol and bleach still stung your nose; the phantom sensation of broken marble embedded in your skin. After that night, there was nowhere for you to truly return to, reminisce with friends what flavors, smells, and experiences you tasted during your youth in that city‒ fuck. Your memory truly was failing you‒ you tried to remember your mother’s face, but all you could remember was a distant, muffled voice and nothing else. What did she look like‒ sound like again? What did you call her? Mama? Mother? Mom? You mentally shifted through multiple faces in your mind, aimlessly matching those words to them‒ but nothing. It almost brought you to tears, but you swallowed it with the tasteless, dryness in your mouth.
“I was, yes.” Was, everything always “was”. Nothing never “is” in the face of eternity.
You had been pushing it into a dark box inside your mind for a while‒ but you knew you would have to face this idea of eternity over and over again, like some Sisyphean bastard. It nestled in your heart as a part of it for a few centuries, growing as you attempted to replace the hole people would leave inside of it with anything‒ anger, apathy, madness, something you could grip and squeeze, searing your hand to preserve something of their fleeting existence. When their body and memories began to wilt however, so did that thing in your fist‒ allowing the hollowness of eternity to fester, eating away at the remnants of your heart. So for the last two centuries, you had retreated solely to the S.T.Y.X labs, severing almost any human connections to preserve the last fragments of yourself. But after six hundred years of repeated heartbreak‒ perhaps being alive was finally getting to you. You could feel the concerned gaze of the three first years, but your mind just drew complete darkness when searching for words to reassure them.
Suddenly, your mind suspended an image in your mind‒ a moment of clarity. You rolled the image in your mind, feeling out its shape with a delicate grip. You were surprised to reveal a picture of your own sculpture, however with the touches Rook made in his own photography. It was soft‒ like fresh laundry baking under the sun‒ green like a young spring sprout, pink like the color of a human heart. It mixed together in a muddled shade, swirling in a mess, a frenzy of colors. The humanity in that grotesque, fleshy shade made you look upwards again with clear eyes‒ reminded of your own sculpture from the first night he had made his way into your atelier. Rarely did you witness where the images in your head descended from��� but you could clearly trace those words that came from him which parted the fog of your mind.
“Magnifique….With my human eyes, that is all I can see.”
You squeezed that image of his crystalline eyes, and muddy picture in your head‒ feeling every curve, tasting every color, delicately burning that picture inside your inhuman flesh‒ hoping no protocol would overwrite the wound it made. The breath you didn't realize you were holding came out in a slight cloud once you released from your tense stomach. Were you overheating? Gods, you felt feverish, though the metal of your skeleton still moved coolly inside your blot-packed tissue.
“(-me)? (Name)?” Ortho swung a hand in front of your face, eyes swimming with concern. “Are you okay? Lunch is over soon.”
You traced the engraving that picture made in your mind. “I’m alright. Thank you Ortho." A small smile graced your lips. You looked forward to the next image that would descend upon you, itching at the tender wound stored closely to remaining human flesh. Perhaps you could look at that divine inspiration through those striking viridian eyes before you let it possess you, but it was difficult to say if there was room for more humanity inside your rusting vessel. Still, the novelty excited you.
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Ortho showed you around the parts of the school Rook hadn't had a chance to get to during your initial tour‒ giving you detailed explanations to each and every room before arriving at a door decorated with a white plastic plate, elegant black ink indicating it was reserved for the Film Studies Club. You swung the door open, allowing the younger Shroud brother to enter before you did.
“Ah, Monsieur Doll‒ oh! And Maître d’Ivoire, I didn’t know you were a fellow fan of the drama and beauty of theater! How wonderful‒ Vil will be thrilled.”
“Ortho suggested I join the stage set crew, but I’m only here to watch. I’m between the Science and the Film Research Club at the moment.”
“In that case I cannot possibly recommend only one! As a member of the Science Club it would be a joy for such an advanced cybernetic being like yourself to join our circle, however‒ as an assistant here at the Film Research Club, we could surely use your masterful skills in designing a truly spectacular set. Ah‒ I'm so torn‒ but the Science Club has so much potential for you, on the other hand ‒ “
“Rook! A word, please?”
“Ah‒ excuse me, mes amines, duty calls.”
You nodded mutely, unable to cram another word in the ceaseless string of sentences that flew out of his mouth. Bidding Ortho good luck with a pat on his head, you sat yourself in the auditorium, mumbling to yourself how you seemed to never be able to escape your feathered stalker.
"Alright‒ look bright first year potatoes‒ we've got a lot to work on! Rook! Where are those two third years that are supposed to be here for rehearsal today? I specifically asked him to come today for just a brief run through!" The inflection of his voice reminded you of an angry, chirping bird, one which Rook reflected with a mulled rumble.
"Désolé, Vil. It seems they're stuck in detention today…perhaps we can run the rehearsal without their parts?"
"No, no." The one you assumed was Vil shook his head. "These first years will be absolutely lost without the two leads for this scene‒ Rook, you'll stand in for Hyacinthus for this scene. And…" He threw his gaze right at you. "You. I don't know what you're doing lounging about‒ but be useful and play Apollo for today."
Briefly catching the smile quirked onto Rook's face, you sighed, pushing your body off of the seat, climbing the steps of the stage and taking the script pushed towards you from Vil's hands. You've never acted before, but it was like sculpting, right? Let life, let humanity, let death possess your cold body like a sublime ghost. Like your hands which carved that glory into glistening ivory, it was now your words which would shape a life out of the breath sucked into your lungs. You were quick to memorize the words on the page, embedding them in your throat as you took position by Vil's command.
"Lie, like this." He instructed. "Loosen your body Rook, lean against their body." Vil directed your bodies at the center of the stage, embracing each other under the dusty theater lights. Both you and Rook did as you were instructed, pressing warmth against warmth. You felt him squirm under your hardened fingertips that rested on his shoulder.
"I'm sorry if my cybernetics are uncomfortable. I could try to touch lighter, if you'd like."
His golden hair gleamed like ribbons in the light, swaying as he shook his head. "Non, you're quite soft." Despite being rocked by his deep breaths close to your own, those words felt distant‒ or perhaps a better word was "distancing", or something which attempted it. It didn't feel quite far, just muffled from your senses‒ still "soft" rang clearly in your mind like a bell, echoing the warmth it brought in your chest as many times as you allowed.
"You're comfortable, then?"
"Yes." His answer came like the wind, a quiet whisper, grazing lightly against your ears. You began, words at your throat bubbling, when Vil commanded action onto the scene. You let the image in your mind possess you.
"Your hair never quite lies flat, here." You touched the smoothed sheen of Rook's hair, plucking a golden strand out and feeling its silk between your fingers. "I don't think I've ever told you how I like it."
Rook pulled the script closer to his face. "You haven't."
“I should have." You let the strand go, seeing it fall gently into the bright curtain crowning his head. Its glow reminded you of gilded gold, glowing porcelain shining through from its age. "What about this? Have I told you what I think of this, just here." Reciting the script with your body, you tipped his head back, drifting your hands at the base of his throat, feeling the pulsing beat which echoed in its hollowness.
"No." He turned his body towards you, taking one slow step back to kneel below you. Sliding his script into another hand, he kept his gaze on it, before slinking his other hand into your gloves. The metal creaked inside your skin, and you thought to cringe at its harsh sound. But the tenderness of which he muffled that metallic squeal with his palms, wrapped lightly over your gloves, stopped you from hardening your face. "And have I spoken about this?" He lifts your hand above his eyes, you follow it, hoping to catch a glimpse of green pointed towards you. "Your hands calloused, from the divine poetry you pluck from your golden lyre." A pause. "Surely I haven't forgotten‒ tell me I did not, Apollo."
"You did not, my muse." You went to cup your hands around his, like the script instructed, but you found the paper to be in your hands‒ in the way. Without a second thought, you threw it out of your hands, somewhere out of your line of sight, its spine cracking harshly against the wooden theater floors. The words were engraved in your mind already. "And what of this‒ Hyacinthus‒ have I spoken of it?" You rested a knee to the ground like him, separating each of his fingers with your own.
“No.” His answer comes even quieter this time. You don't worry if his voice carries to others as it should during any rehearsal. The mountain in his throat bobbed, the muscles near his jaw shivering.
"There is this too." You reached a cold hand towards his face‒ still the anxiety of your harsh body instilled in your mind. The skin round your metal bones, to the organs sitting, packed in your torso were all made with the violence of human desire. You searched his eyes for that same hunger, again, but you found nothing this time. The space you held, hesitant, above the pink of his face softened into a solid touch. "I know I have told you of this."
He sucked in a shallow breath you could feel under the pulse of your palm. "Tell me again."
For a moment, you felt that divine image withdraw from you. It was petrifying‒ there was no instance in the six hundred years you had lived where that holy possession left you empty before you could carve it into the hardness of reality. But when you found yourself warmed not by its fleeting light, but the one that beamed from the flush of Rook's cheek‒ you let go of that chill, drinking in the heat that throbbed under your fingertips. Still as marble, you let yourself sink into the green of his eyes, this time, which were pointed directly at your whole with what could only be described as adoration.
"-Cut!" The brightness of the entire stage lighting up once more brought you back to reality. You shrunk your creaking hand from him, cringing at the scraping sound it made under your skin. "Zephyr‒ didn’t I just tell you that it was your cue right there?? You should already be on set by 'Tell me again'. Mark that on your paper so you don't forget, again.."
You chilled your face by feeling the metal under your skin, draining yourself of the remaining pieces of that image, that heat‒ moving smoothly before you reached a hand to Rook, still on the ground with the script in his hands. He looked up at you, seeing the shadow you created, staring blankly for a minute before shaking it off in favor of his usual fox-like grin. Even in the harsh darkness, you saw that shimmer pooling in his eyes.
"Merci, mon ami."
You stared mutely, watching him take your hand, the tip of his middle finger drew softly across your bare pulse, revealed by the pull of your glove by his grip. On instinct, you pulled away while he pulled in to lift his body off the ground‒ the tendons in your arms stretching, stretching, stretching until you felt them snap beside the metal bone. Anything but your hands‒ the curse which ineptly attempted to infuse your eternity into still flesh‒ much too quick‒ gone, gone, gone, you remembered.
Rook jerked backwards while the base of your arm tore into two‒ your body falling towards him to catch him with your other arm, stabilized with your light-fast knee lunging to him. Your in-tact hand easily caught his back, while you stared, wildly, into his widened eyes. Raising him to an upwards posture with a controlled straightening of your leg, you brought him back up to the soles of his feet‒ letting go as soon as he was balanced on top of them. You felt many eyes on you once more, concentrated at your shoulder where you uniform ripped, revealing the blot that bubbled from silvery metal under your ruptured skin.
Vil turned his head towards, you his stiff body following it. “You‒“
“I know.” That answer came sharply. You inhuman brute, immortal beast, machine‒ I know, I know. In the centuries you had lived, the eyes and whispers of many never bothered you much‒ but when you felt Rook graze against your cursed hands which spearheaded your parting with human flesh, after you two had held flesh against, what you thought was your flesh once more‒ it plunged you back into that hollow body, too large, too tall for your human heart. You felt words scorch your throat.
Play the part‒ let it possess you‒ empty the cup, fill it with an image not your own.
“I’ll be fine.” You raised a hand to cover the hideous healing of your arm, spurting and gushing with viscous black ink to forge your body back to its original form. It felt cold, writhing and twitching in the air‒ a heartless mockery of warm blood which fluttered delicately under human flesh‒ one you felt on Rook’s face just a few fleeting moments ago.
You saw Ortho appear from the curtains, floating towards you, examining your arm with worry. “(Name)- are you okay?? I think you should get that checked! Brother can take a look at it‒ just in case?” He pleaded.
Shifting your head downwards to examine the blot, you made the mistake of sweeping your eyes across Rook’s‒ his lips parted slightly, eyes widened into a crystalline solidity your wavering eyes did not possess. Too bright‒ burning. It welled a tightness in your throat.
Clenching your teeth, you answered Ortho. “I think I’ll do that. Excuse me.” Your legs leapt off the stairs of the stage, body swallowed by the darkness of the auditorium, back warmed by the light that radiated off of the stage. You heard Vil clap his hands, before the murmurs of first year students began once more as you slipped out of the room. Your body moved automatically, bringing toward the courtyard, where the shed was situated. Slumping your shoulder against it, you forced your way in, stumbling onto the wooden floors. Looking around, gliding your bleary eyes across the statues‒ you recognized no one.
Who’s memories did you hold? Who’s sadness was this‒ who’s hurt? Wounds felt too large, too feverish, too alive to feel like it belonged to your cold metal body. Who’s heart was this? Take it out, take it out. Your hands, your body, your life had been one filled with that action‒ stripped of anything you embraced. But just this once, you begged the sky where divine images descended from, to take just this one thing‒ everything, if you must‒ away from you. But it was fogged from your ragged, white breaths‒ and even without it, you weren’t sure if the gods above would gift you that clarity, the hope of a human‒ for, surely, you did not recognize humanity within you anymore. You tried to remember your own face from six hundred centuries ago, one which held the liveliness, the hunger, and the grotesque flush of a human’s. But no images descended upon you, so you shook that hollowness in your metal hand, hoping to crush it into a solid form with the pressure. No tears were shed, for such pleasures were only reserved for those of animal flesh. But you wept, voice rising from your chest, becoming foreign and uncanny when they reached the throat.
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Notes:
Rook’s character kind of reminds me of Oba Yozo from No Longer Human by Dazai Osamu‒ I think one of his biggest fears is someone seeing through the mask of his character because behind it, there’s fear, anxiety, an emptiness which he seeks to fill with even just the fabrication of passion (in that way he also reminds me of Confession of a Mask by Mishima). For him, I think he’s paralyzed with choice, so he kind of overplays his character of “hunter of love” to cover up the quiet anxiety he feels about all the possibilities that are stretched out before him. But in some ways that becomes security, truth, clarity for him to the extent that the straight forward/intuitive manner in which you speak and create kind of muddles that picture of clarity for him. So theres a reality in that "hunter of love" character but its also very fragile because it was originally meant to be a stand in for something more concrete. I saw a post on tumblr with a concept drawing for his character that said “表情がウソくさい“、meaning his expressions seem “made up”/played up, so I was like ah yes, I’m absolutely going to read too much into this. And now here we are lmao
Is mood maker a phrase in English?? Lol i don’t remember lmk if its wrong
When Mitski said “Yet Now I find I’ve grown into a tall child” I felt that‒ lesbian Jesus strikes again Mitski seems to find way into my writing every time but she’s also a hyperfixation of mine
Greece actually fell like 2100 years ago around 146 BC BUT i figured with the help of magic technology/culture would move more rapidly?? So I shrunk it down to like 600 years
The play part is pulled directly from Song of Achilles lol (except I changed it to Hyacinthus and Apollo), I knew if I were to write a bit in the play I'd get waaaay into it and the chapter would take forever so, you win some you lose some I guess
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Hi Lexi! It's so much fun that you're doing match-ups! 💜 If I may, I'd like to ask for one, please?
To answer a few of your questions,
I have no idea what an Enneagram type is. All I know is I'm an INTJ, a Scorpio, and a Slytherin. All of which makes me sound like a villain but I promise I'm actually ridiculously polite and friendly. Mama raised me right
My go-to way to fall asleep has been listening to ASMR for 7 years now. Back in college, my apartment was literally right next to the freeway and it was always so loud that I needed to listen to something else. Which is when I discovered and delved into it for the first time and have stuck around ever since.
I have so many different names I'd consider changing mine to but I really like Aurora "Rory"
My brand-new favorite Redacted audio is Avior's S1 finale. I've been waiting for so long. Hopefully that doesn't give away who I am lol. Other favorites include all of Elliott's happy ones, the Elemental boys non-canon confessions (Huxley's is my favorite of the three), and almost all of Caelum's playlist. My son
I don't really get the hype for Yanderes in general but Blake in particular, like, I got nothin'.
I could literally stand in front of you and quote The Incredibles front to back, doing Very Bad Impressions of all the character voices, and bad vocal renditions of the soundtrack. I watched it every day when I was like 8-9. I love that movie.
I would also like Cam and Caelum to be my best friends.
Fun fact: my go-to ramble is also space! I watched one (1) Bill Nye video on the sun when I was like 8 or 9 and I was hooked. Fast forward to college and I got a 97% overall in Honors Astronomy my freshman year and my honors program advisor looked at my transcript and went, "How did you get that high of an A in Honors Astronomy?" and I was like, "It wasn't hard???" And my advisor goes, "Yes it is! No one gets that high of an A in Honors Astronomy." And I'm sitting there like, "Well, uh... I did." Also, in said Honors Astronomy class, the professor put up two nearly-identical graphics (emission spectrum of hydrogen) and asked what the difference between the top and bottom ones were and I raised my hand and said, "The bottom one is red-shifted" (not knowing he was about to introduce the Doppler Effect but already knowing what that was) and my professor stares at me for a solid 10 seconds in stunned silence and said, "I've been teaching this course for 20 years and you're the first one to get that question right on the first try." So... yeah. Big space nerd. 🌟
One other thing that says a lot about me is that I adore that the Redacted d(a)emon aesthetic is music and stars. Music was the first thing I was taught to love by my musician family, and the stars were the first thing I loved for myself.
Also if I were an Empowered race, I'd definitely be a Freelancer, but one with a heavy emphasis in Dreamwalking, Psychokinesis, Fire Elemental Command, and Electro Command. I'm not cool enough to be a specialized race. Oh man I'm a rambler. I'll stop now.
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Don’t stop the rambling; I think it’s wonderful, and you know what? So would Lasko.
I think it’d be so cute to have a thoughtful and rambly partner for Lasko. Conversations are a push and pull, and I think Lasko is too often one or the other, trying so hard. Because of that, I imagine it would be so peaceful and quieting for him to not feel like he has to talk or contribute and to be able to just listen and be there for you.
Overall, Lasko is uniquely situated to uplift and care for you. INTJs (and Slytherins to an extent) are characterized as intelligent, ambitious, and virulently independent. Lasko, who strikes me somewhere on the brink of an ISFJ, would be a lovely partner for you in that his hardworking nature and ambition would not combat or stifle yours but would support it.
Song:
What's the hurry/ When you know that you've got me/ Don't you worry, I've nowhere to be/ Other than right next to you
I went looking specifically through my Lasko/OC playlist for this one, and I was not disappointed. Lasko is such a ride or die dude, you feel me? He’s so dedicated to the people he loves and the family he’s chosen, so once he chooses you, there’s nothing stopping him.
Runner-Ups:
Anton also strikes me as a wonderful listener; I can easily picture him tinkering with some machinery while nodding and humming and listening to you wax poetic about the music playing in his workshop. Vincent would also be a good listener, not by his own virtue but just by being a fuckin simp. He’s the type who’d have his chin perched on his hands, starry eyed and mooning as you infodump and trying his honest to god best to understand what you’re saying even if he has no clue.
Note: I don’t think you sound like a villain! I’m an INTJ, and my boyfriend is a Slytherin, so you’re in fantastic company in my opinion 💜
Want a match-up of your own? Read this post, and tell me about yourself!
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The Mastermind & the Teacher
How I get along with ENFJs as an INTJ
The people’s champion. It’s always a blast when I’m around you. You take it upon yourselves to ensure I’m enjoying my time. I’m more than happy of letting you take the reins of any situation when it comes to group activities — whether it’s a night out drinking bender or an all-night team project. I also love how basic you are. Like you guys own that #LiveLaughLove hashtag. Your Instagram is full of cheesy quotes and pictures with your dear BFFs. Your walls are plastered with Hallmarks cards and motivational posters.
But we both know there’s a lot more to you. Material possessions and Internet persona don’t wholly define you. They don’t do a good job showing how insightful, intelligent, and driven you are. With the ENFJs I know, we click fast and become close friends who can talk for hours about anything. We enjoy having intellectual conversations about this emotional mysterious rollercoaster that is life. You’re always the one who starts them. That’s where the real you thrives, the human behind the profile pic.
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Let’s stop with the smiles, candies, and balloons for a moment. With your Extraverted Feeling-Extraverted Sensing, you engage with the social enterprise around you. You are in other words a manager of human egos, not a people pleaser. I’ve heard you say ‘no’ way more often than ‘yes.’ Sometimes you may need to discipline and tell an asshole to fuck off. In fact, I think you wear that disapproving angry face better than that courtesy smiling one. You know what I mean — the one that makes people regret for disappointing you.
Being an emotions manager means you apply social lubrication and persuade egos to work together. You have the creativity and confidence to improve culture. But before you do that, it all first starts by becoming the living epitome of your beliefs. You are righteousness personified, a walking moral compass steamrolling your way to the Northstar. Being the shining example is the first step to connect with others. People gotta see your work paying off to start believing in your ideas. It’s a lot of pressure being a role model.
"Some people say, 'Give the customers what they want.' But that’s not my approach. Our job is to figure out what they’re going to want before they do. I think Henry Ford once said, 'If I’d asked customers what they wanted, they would have told me, ‘A faster horse!’' People don’t know what they want until you show it to them. That’s why I never rely on market research. Our task is to read things that are not yet on the page." - Steve Jobs
Despite the stereotypes of being fake (which is bullshit by the way), the best of you admit you have struggles. There are days when you’re defeated, when you relapse, when you just can’t. You’re human, that in itself is hard. You understand you can’t do it all alone. And you know how to find help by revealing your true selves, scarred and weathered, but stubbornly pushing because life’s worth believing in something. Sometimes a call to the ether via social media is all you need to channel in some positivity.
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You don’t have to be this charismatic leader. Being an Fe dominant doesn’t make you a social butterfly. The more reserved ENFJs don’t have any interest in being the center of attention. Many of you claim to be introverts. Doing the right thing doesn’t mean you have to be sociable or likeable. So if these are not ENFJ criteria, then what is? Let’s ask ourselves: Why are ENFJs the way they are? Why is there this need to set social harmony? What are they striving for? To answer these, allow me to present a butchered summary of Plato’s Allegory of the Cave.
The story starts with chained prisoners forced to stare at a wall inside the cave since birth. Their entire perceptions of reality are formed by the shadows on the wall. One day, a prisoner breaks free, turns around, and realizes the shadows were mere projections of their true forms casted by a fire. The freed prisoner manages to get outside of the cave, and is mesmerized discovering the world for what it really is. He then goes back into the cave to spread the truth about reality to the other prisoners. The story ends with the freed prisoner getting ridiculed. He was deemed delusional and dangerous.
“Leaders should never be satisfied. They must always strive to improve, and they must build that mind-set into the team. They must face the facts through a realistic, brutally honest assessment of themselves and their team’s performance. It starts with the individual and spreads to each of the team members until this becomes the culture, the new standard.” — Jocko Willink
Struggling out of the cave to be then blinded by the sunlight, the freed prisoner returned to his friends because what he learned outside was worth sharing. He experienced something that his friends couldn’t imagine. It was something truer than anything he knew. He couldn’t go back looking at life the old way. It was after his eyesights adjusted he realized how deprived the other prisoners were. “Life can be so much more meaningful, if only they could break their chains,” he must’ve thought.
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Another feature of TiNi is the innate imperative to understand the world and others. Blanketed by the outward charm and warmth, ENFJs are intelligent supercomputers building algorithms personalized for the people around them. You make me feel so seen! You’re studying me. You psychically predict my emotions and lay out my current state of mind. You pick up my body language and my tone of voice, dig my feelings out, and put them up for us to see.
Personally, the way you do that never felt intrusive. I’ve always felt like I was a plain covered book on a shelf for anyone interested in reading me. Having Introverted Intuition-Introverted Feeling, I always look over at how I’m feeling on a philosophical, idealistic, and existential level. This is why we get along. I’m not like the other skeptical prisoners. If you say there’s a bigger truth out there worth seeing, I’m curious. Together, we’ll claw ourselves out from the cave, and enjoy this promised beautiful world.
“The most successful people in life recognize, that in life they create their own love, they manufacture their own meaning, they generate their own motivation. For me, I am driven by two main philosophies, know more today about the world than I knew yesterday. And lessen the suffering of others. You’d be surprised how far that gets you.” — Neil deGrasse Tyson
This promised world… Honestly, I didn’t have an idea of what that actually was. Like what was it supposed to be exactly? All I knew was I had to get there. And that I’d be happy there. I imagined being free, living by my values without compromise, and doing whatever I please. I got rid of whatever didn’t give me joy, like changing jobs and cutting off toxic people. And in turn I spent more time with my loved ones, my passions, and doing things I believed in. Life was great. Just another day in paradise.
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To do such a vulnerable thing was too humiliating. I was too good for that. My emotional intelligence was too “high” for that. How ironic that I couldn’t bring myself to do a basic smile. Nobody was judging besides my own reflection. I wimped away from the self-inflicted awkwardness and indignation. I hated that about me. All of this time searching for a way out to freedom, I’ve been imprisoned deep in the cave by my own ego. I was stuck, fixated on an idea of a certain “me” that was nothing but a mere shadow on a wall.
True to the allegory, someone had to help me break my chains. It was a struggle at first to externalize my emotions. I didn’t know how to properly express them. I didn’t know if they were the right things to experience. I had zero idea how I came off. I needed to take baby steps. That’s when I understood all of those corny basic bitch things, those lame #LiveLaughLove’s, those selfies and emojis were exactly the baby steps I needed to take. You were my example.
“Commitment is a big part of what I am and what I believe. How committed are you to winning? How committed are you to being a good friend? To being trustworthy? To being successful? How committed are you to being a good father, a good teammate, a good role model? There’s that moment every morning when you look in the mirror: Are you committed, or are you not?” — LeBron James
You took notice of my progress. And you were always there supporting me, partaking on the shenanigans, and reflecting together on the more serious things. One time our convo was getting deep, and in that moment I saw how you briskly paused yourself to hear what I had to say. That’s when it all started to click. Whatever I was mulling over was always worth sharing. It didn’t matter how incomplete my thoughts were, they could be insightful for anyone hearing them.
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Finally, I got out of my cave and saw reality for what it truly is. Authenticity doesn’t mean to do what feels good. It means to have the strength to keep my heart open whenever I feel it close. I learned that keeping things to myself didn’t make me free. I’d never know what I actually am by avoiding social interactions. Connecting with others is what allowed me to explore that. I discovered that I’m a pretty funny guy and a kind calming soul. The truth is life is unsolvable. But just like how we strive for excellence and not perfection, let’s do our best to fulfill it. At best we get wisdom, not answers.
When I share my feelings and have heart-to-hearts with people, I found my freedom. The world began to feel more meaningful, more blissful, more intimate. I started to get genuinely excited for sunrises. I feel connected with people of different cultures, and even of other historical eras. The more I learn about nature and the stars above, the more I’m thankful for the life I’m given. Everyday became a chance to let my emotions play and to present the best me — the real me.
Now I look to help others in becoming their best selves too. I’d love for them to experience how I feel about life. We’re not that different after all. I’ve watched you show how you care for people. Inspired by your example, I learned how to better visibly show love to those close to me, and how to better show my true self to the world. You’ve taught me how to love myself and make myself be seen. I hope after reading this blog that, at least to some degree, I gave you that same feeling of being loved and seen.
Thank you for showing me the way.
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aletheapierce · 9 months
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{ NATASHA LIU BORDIZZO, 21, GENDER NONCONFORMING, SHE/THEY } Is that ALETHEA PIERCE? A SENIOR originally from SAVANNAH, GA, they decided to come to Ogden College to study DANCE. They’re THE DRAG-ALONG on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.
no one ever really likes me for more than just a couple weeks...
NAME: alethea ivy pierce NICKNAMES: none, thea to a select few BIRTHDAY: february 23, 2002 ZODIAC: pisces sun, scorpio rising, aquarius moon SEXUALITY: bisexual RELIGION: ceo methodist (christmas & easter only) THREE POSITIVE TRAITS: idealistic, hospitable, wholesome THREE NEGATIVE TRAITS: paranoid, indecisive, timid THREE SKILLS: fluent in french, calligraphy, detailed-oriented ENNEAGRAM: 9w1 MYERS-BRIGGS: intj EXTRACURRICULARS: ballet company, tri-del (member)
AESTHETIC: pink painted nails, tucking hair behind your ears, off-distant stares, shy smiles, hollowed looks, books in tote bags, quiet giggles, leaning in when intrigued, earbuds, furiously scribbling in journals, waking up with tears, monsters chasing you in dreams, warm tea and milk, a cookie crumbling in your hand, barefoot on hardwood floors, watching the sunset alone
CHARACTER INSPO: nina sayers (black swan), georgiana darcy (pride & prejudice), jaz sinclair (caos), betty cooper (riverdale). myrtha (giselle), daisy buchanan (the great gatsby), juliet capulet (romeo & juliet), lady edith crawley (downton abbey), betty elms (muholland drive), andy bernard (the office), harriet smith (emma)
LIKES: ballet, taylor swift, dresses, gin and tonics, daydreaming, sparkles, quietly reading, the wind through her hair DISLIKES: stares, having to answer questions, being alone, being in crowds, people yelling, being judged
FAVORITE MOVIES/TV: the eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, shrek, black swan, the secret life of walter mitty, gilmore girls, dance academy, big fish, all the boys love many lane, fleabag FAVORITE BOOKS: six of crows, the invisible life of addie larue, on earth we’re briefly gorgeous, pride and prejudice, the uglies series FAVORITE ARTISTS: halsey, taylor swift, lizzy mcalpine, nicholas britell, hans zimmer, chelsea cutler, phoebe bridgers FAVORITE BALLETS: giselle, firebird, la sylphide, carmen
FAMILY: mother - jennifer tiner pierce (katheryn winnick) father - carl sile pierce (daniel wu) younger brother - hu jacob pierce (kazuma mitchell)
pinterest here, playlist here.
WHEN ALL THE BRIDGES HAVE BEEN BURNED:
jennifer pierce expected the best of her children. she gave them the best so of course they had to return the favor. she had inherited her father’s business, and was excelling so much her husband took her last name. it wasn’t a feminist thing, but a money thing you see. alethea grew up without a want, but the truth of the matter is she never knew what she wanted. her mother made those decisions. from what she wore, to how she cut her hair, to who her friends were and what activities did. her entire life was planned to a t, and alethea never questioned a moment of it. how do you question something that you didn’t know was an option?
her brother jacob was doted on, and grew up with a grin and popularity. this was easy to him. this was painful for alethea. she smiled and waved, and the only matters of relief she found were in her ballet classes. going professional hadn’t been her mother’s first plan, but seeing the natural talent her daughter was, and just how feminine she was, allowed this small change in the over all path forward.
jennifer and carl met at ogden, and she knew that was where her children were to go. there was no exception, and jennifer would do whatever needed for her kids to follow her legacy. the major was flexible, but they would go to ogden, they would find suitable spouses, and they would carry on the family legacy. it was picture perfect, and she never heard a single word of complaint from either of her children. 
AND ALL THE TABLES HAVE BEEN TURNED BY ME:
growing up without decisions meant college was terrifying for alethea. she had to pick her classes, find friends that her mother couldn’t approve of, and suddenly had free time that wasn’t planned out for her? it was paralyzing. but during the second week of classes greer spotted alethea across the way and took her under her wing. she showed her what the world could be, and she still fit under that approval from jennifer pierce. greer wasn’t just her best friend, but she was a bit of a savior for her.
this whole time there has been a gnawing in her chest. a desire for freedom, a petition to let the real alethea out and run free. but who was she? alethea couldn’t answer that, not honestly. just who her mother had manufactured her to be. but this confusion, this shyness, this quietness played into a different picture of alethea. it allowed her to be whatever anyone wanted her to be, they could paint their own ideas of her. she could be mysterious, she could be all they ever wanted. and she could be a dream.
and it was through this exploration that alethea slowly stepped out of the pillars her mother had built for her. first came the time greer dared her to kiss another girl during spin the bottle, and alethea realized that she might have enjoyed it more than her mother would have liked. and then came the time greer put her in a suit instead of a dress, and she liked the way it looked on her. and that maybe she wasn’t a girl after all, but something that could be shed. and so they started to pick up new pieces of theirself, putting them together to form a whole new journey. was ballet even the career they wanted? did they even like ogden? who were these people that had been decided as their friends? the questions became overwhelming.
WHO WILL BE LEFT TO LEAVE? JUST ME:  
and now greer is gone. and it’s noticeable the change in alethea. it began before her disappearance of course, but could it somehow be correlated? alethea willingly goes out, sometimes alone, now. they are keeping greers friends, they are speaking up and out, they have a bite to them that hadn’t existed once upon a time. what does the future hold of alethea? are they becoming who they really are, or are they once again pretending, shedding the quiet role they had lived into for all their life for one that looks a little more like their now missing friend…
GREER:
during freshman year at ogden, alethea was absolutely lost and in-over her head. she had never been the rebellious type, her parents had been too strict to allow non-sense in their house, and so alethea was overwhelmed with the freedom college could allow, and she had no idea how to deal with it. her mother had always taught her to seek out the ‘right’ people to befriend, and it was just her luck that greer extended her own friendship to alethea. she brought them to the parties, encouraged her to flirt with whomever was necessary in order to go after who she wanted, and overall guided alethea through college. they doesn’t know if she would have been able to survive any of it without greer. there was little jealousy on alethea’s side at the beginning - she was just grateful for what greer could offer her through her friendship. and alethea was not a threat to greer. but as they’ve grown older there has been a tension living in the friendship, the reliance upon each other that might not be as necessary anymore. alethea was not anymore outgoing or less shy, but now her shyness was being interpreted as mystery, making them a bit more intriguing to others and perhaps sparking some jealousy on greer’s side.
THE DRAG-ALONG:  
you know that girl that was always a few steps behind greer and the fallen princess? the one with wide eyes and a quiet demeanor? they never seemed to talk much, but even in their silence never seemed to be entirely so observant that you had to watch what you were saying. really, she just seemed like a little pet to the best friends, a third they allowed to follow them around. 
and that person? that was alethea, taken under greer’s wing during the first weeks of school freshman year but never brought too close. it was the kind of relationship where alethea was sure to call greer one of her best friends, and greer might hesitate, only referring to them as a simple friend. but wherever the fallen princess and greer were, alethea was there. fingers picking at each other, posture both immaculate and slouched. each semester they seemed to get a bit bolder, inching their way up next to the other two, but still never find herself as an equal. 
extra:
previous tasks found here
they have their septum pierced that they flip up whenever they go home and hide from their mother
her room is usually incredibly clean 
often found walking around campus as if they are in their own world
junior year recap:
g told alethea to start a fight at greer's birthday party so she picked a fight with heni who pushed her in the pool
found polaroids with monty in their chalet during the winter ski retreat black-out
told heni about the polaroids (it was their chalet after all)
thought they saw greer in the hall of mirrors during the spring carnival
g set them up with lola in the library before the rave, did a poor job looking for g when tempted
suffered from smoke inhalation during the fire in the commons trying to escape out of the back
went mia for a bit over the summer
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enfinity · 2 years
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US AGAINST THE WORLD 🎸 OO. intro: the invitation (820 words.)
NOTE ; hey! so i've made a mistake on the last three photos. for the sake of the plot, reader's phone will be light mode, while jake's will be dark. please keep this in mind especially when they switch phones <3 other than that, enjoy!
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AGAINST ALL ODDS (IN THE HANDS OF HIS VACANCY), SUNGHOON’S COIN LANDED ON HEADS.
Jungwon groaned as the four of you made way towards the street of Jaehee’s house. “I have a swim meet tomorrow morning. And a lab exam. And a swim meet.” He spoke louder, making sure to emphasize the 'swim meet' with guilt-tripping intent. Suddenly, he frowned thinking. “Where even is Hyeongjun, anyway? How come he got out of this so easily?”
Hyeongjun? You knew better than to invite Han Hyeongjun (MBTI: INTJ. Major: Music Theory. Occupation: None. Because he wants to avoid any form of human contact as much as possible.) when he most likely put his phone face down on Do-Not-Disturb as soon as Hani texted the group about a massive party event of college socialites.
“Probably busy with some homework.” But you answered, anyway.
“Oh, and I had to come despite my first swim meet and lab exam of the fall semester?”
“Suck it up,” Sunghoon puffed out, his breath forming the shape of a cloud from the autumn fog as the corner of his lips pulled into a knowing smirk. “just like how I sucked y-”
“Sunghoon, if you mention my mom one more time.”
You and your best friend Hani were huddled together - arm in arm, hand in hand, and occasionally you'd step on one of the other's foot by how small the proximity of your legs were as they brushed together. You both share a glance before giggling at the boys’ quarrel, which earned a side-eye from Sunghoon himself.
The man raised his eyebrows at the sight of you both in amusement. (Is it really that cold? He probably wondered.) “Pussies.”
You scoff. “At least we get some.”
Somehow, it was easy for Sunghoon to get everyone in the same room to hate him at once.
By the time you and Sunghoon get down to arguing (followed by the meddlesome whining of Jungwon's in regard to the migraine he’s afflicted from you both, of course), the bright illuminance of the lampposts that stood tall before Jaehee's mansion grew more vivid by the second. Your friendly walk seemed to be coming to an end.
“Hey— did any of you come bearing gifts? ‘Cause I for sure didn’t bring anything.” Hani spoke up, ruining the heat of your guys’ debate, which was clearly not the utmost concern anymore. All three of you avert your gazes to the girl, all the more inflamed.
“You have got to be shitting us right now.”
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On the other side of the mansion - parked in front of the car garage - Sim Jaeyun and Park Jongseong felt as if their asses were glued to the seats of their car. 
Jake’s fingers tapped uneasily against the window’s edge of the car door as Jay switched off the engine before pulling the keys out of the ignition. The younger bandmate held his breath the moment he saw Jay glower at him from the corner of his eye.
“Don’t mess this up, Sim.” The leader sighed, though he knew he was only emitting the pressure off to someone else so that he could feel less at fault, too. Yet, neither of the boys were feeling any better. “We’re not supposed to be here in the first place.”
He handed Jake a feathery ballroom mask with a dark blue that admirably matched his suited attire as its black-jeweled engravement was complemented by a touch of gold. Surprised that it didn't look like it came from the nearest Party City, Jake stared at the mask for a moment, calloused fingers gently tracing its rich modern beauty.
“I was able to sneak into the props room.” Jay spoke up, his leader antics putting him a step ahead of the question left unspoken. “Let’s hope they won’t need it in the next hour or so.”
Jake hummed in attentive response but was shortly caught off-guard as he heard the shrill of young adults making way towards the family residence before them. Unknowingly, his grip onto the mask tightened and his soft touch was prevailed by an evil of green.
He missed being that free.
“We really aren’t supposed to be here.” Jake muttered, throwing Jay off-guard this time at the sound of his own bandmate agreeing to no dispute at all. “Do you think she’ll be happy to see me?”
He glanced over at his hyung, vulnerability slowly melting the guard of Jay’s headstrong disposition (to which he’s made sure to curse himself for— having a sentimental weakness for his members).
“Dude, it’s Jaehee.” Jay scoffed before slapping a hand onto Jake’s shoulder in frustration. “Of course she will.”
A sudden buzz from the pocket of Jay’s pants startled their conversation to a halt. He took out his phone and glanced at the screen before quickly grabbing onto the door handle. “It’s Gunil. Him and the band are here. You got your phone with you?” Jake nodded in reply, waving his black iPhone 11 in display. “Good,” Jay hummed.
“Don’t lose it.”
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M.LIST ✉︎ NEXT>
A JAKE SIM SMAU . . . exhausted from the masquerade you and your friends chanced upon last night, the only memory you recall was meeting a boy who matched the color of your mask, psyche, and phone a little too perfectly for him to be just a one-time stranger. ˚ ༘ ꩜‽
TAGLIST OPEN ; please leave an ask, pm, or comment to be added! @nctufh @sunbokie @sthinqsz @hobistigma @unipanda1006 @yougeans @jakemyluv @ddeonubaby @msxflower @studioreader @heelariously @emobeomgyu @iamnotgrootforiamthor @bigtittietoji @theskzvibe @vampsvngie @nyujjan @wonielover @missmadwoman @ilove-jake @lilactangerine @wonyofanclub @woneulz @sansluvr @viscoolreal @wonielover
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notanotherinfjblog · 2 years
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Bias ramblings
I think it’s fascinating how we all have biases for or against certain cognitive functions in other people that we are not even aware of. When I take a look at my bookshelves, about 80% of the books in there were written by ESTPs and ENTPs, while only two(!!) books in there were written by FPs. The rest were written by ESFJs, some TJs and INTPs, but the INTP stories always feel like there’s something missing. I love how I can always very quickly tell if a story was written by an FP just by the way that the characters interact because viewing them through the lens of Fi feels so foreign that the story might as well have been created by aliens. And it’s interesting how that correlates with the disconnect I experience between me and most FPs, especially ISFPs, in real life. It’s nothing personal, it’s not like we dislike each other. We are just aliens to one another. I love a lot of FP musicians, but the ones that can make me cry are the ESTP ones, when yet another one of them writes a song that is created from Se and Fe and they sing about how this life was meant to be experienced together and that we are all one and that whenever something’s wrong, we are all going to be there for you, you are always going to find a home in us. This is love, this is safety. I’m a sucker for the word “we”, I’m an FJ after all. And my ESFJ mother has this same bias. Every FP she meets, there’s going to be a clash. I remember a time, when we were in a group of an ESFJ, ISTP, INTJ, ENFP and me as an INFJ, but it didn’t feel like a group because ENFP kept pulling someone aside to talk to them privately, thus creating a boundary between her and the rest of us, making us all feel like individuals surrounded by people. And my ESFJ mother lost it, and the only ones who could understand it were ISTP and me, the two other Fe users. This same ISTP is one of the chillest people you can imagine, but whenever he meets a TJ, he wants nothing to do with them, preferably never see them again. But this is his personal bias. I also know an ISTP who is married to an ESTJ. Likewise, my ISFP stepmother has a great dislike against FJs, meanwhile my ISFP and ESFJ friends are the most perfect couple you could meet. So these biases are not the same for everyone sharing the same MBTI type. We form these biases on our own, though I don’t really know how. My bias against Fi makes no sense when you consider that my best and oldest friend is an ESFP and I’ve known her for as long as I can remember, though I do remember us mutually hating each other when we met when we were three. One of my other closest friends is an INFP, yet 90% of FPs I meet feel like aliens that drain my energy, while the other 10% (typically ENFPs) are the ones that decide to adopt me 0.5 seconds after meeting me. Why are we always drawn to the same group of MBTI types and why is it not always mutual? NFPs gravitate much more toward me than I to them. I’ve been asked out by a couple of ENTPs, but in the end they always tell me that we are too different people, even when I don’t think so. TJs like me and I like them, but a proper mutual fondness only develops with the NTJs. When I first met my ENTJ friend, we were in a group with an ESFP and an ISFP, and the only one that got on fine with each of us was ESFP, but it was ENTJ and I that stared at each other and both of us immediately went “oh! I choose this one, this one is friend-shaped.” A lot of ESTPs tend to be quite fond of me and I like them, but the fondness usually isn’t mutual. ESFJs and I are never a problem, but somehow we never end up being close friends, despite getting on very well. Which reminds me of my ESFP friend who is very attracted to Se in other people and frequently crushes on other SFPs, but it never amounts to anything more than one or two dates. There’s simply not enough of a difference between them. Being too similar to each other doesn’t work for relationships. Humans need diversity, which is why you will never find the same MBTI type within the same nuclear family, not even in identical twins. Literally all STJs I know absolutely hate meeting other STJs. It’s a blind hatred toward one another from the very beginning for absolutely no reason other than recognising a piece of them selves in the other. And even in movies, where a couple of (casting) directors artificially orchestrate family/friend/relationship dynamics, it’s incredibly rare to find a movie couple that’s played by two actors of the same type. But there are biases in casting choices, too. There are so many ENTP writers/showrunners/directors that will almost always cast ENTPs as their lead actors. Some tv shows are completely overrun by FJ actors or SP actors etc. that it simply cannot be a coincidence. Whenever there’s more than two intuitives on a cast, the project is usually run by an intuitive themselves. 
What I’m trying to say is: we are all biased in our relationships with other people in a very systematic way, and I personally believe that we tend to be drawn to those types and cognitive functions that provide a good balance to us. Why has my ESFJ mother married two Ti-doms? Because her own Ti is garbage and she needs someone to talk sense into her when she’s jumping to conclusions again. Why has my ESTJ friend befriended at least 8 intuitives that I know of (which is crazy)? Because she likes using Ne and they unlock the more fun part of her. Why does my ESTP friend have a whole collection of FJ friends? Because all these typical Fe behaviours, as she once said, make her feel warm and safe. Why do I get on so well with TJs? Because I’m an absolute loser at navigating the real world and don’t know how any of this works. It’s about balance. 
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ay-chuu · 2 years
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heyhey! is the matching event still opened? if so i would like a matchup for twisted wonderland
i go by they/she pronouns and i usually like to wear cutesy clothing with slight macabre themes (pills, syringes, bandages all that. look up yami kawaii for more stuffs) these can vary between pastel and somewhat gothic/scene. i am also 159 cm, if that accounts to anything.
my zodiac sign is aries and i am an intj with a 4w5 enneagram. as far as general personality type stuff goes, riamu yumemi and shin sato are pretty on the mark but i suppose i'm just not as open abt me being mentally ill than riamu is considering i just mask my emotions a lot of the time.
and my hobbies consist of astronomy, music compositions, and stag beetle terrariums!
as far as my pet peeves go, i hate sudden loud noises or constantly loud noises as the latter gives me a migraine after awhile. slimy food textures and foods that trigger my gag reflex as well is a massive ick for me too. i also despise slow-paced tasks since they easily make me bored and then i get distracted to do something else
my favorites are relatively spread out, i don't consume much television or movies so it's pretty much games and music for me. i like rhythm games such as project sekai, bandori, and idolmaster and i like games that fall into the rpg genre like pokemon, omori, earthbound, yume nikki, etc. with this, i do quite enjoy visual novels too. as far as music goes, i like a lot of punk rock but sometimes i'll consume other genres (fav english song is love me dead by ludo and atm my fav jp song is shoujo rei by mikitop)
as far as musical artists go, it can vary quite a lot. my most notable ones are probably pepoyo, shinra-bansho, akatsuki records, mcr, and green day.
i am so sorry that was longer than intended, i hope you have a good day and be sure to stay hydrated! ^^
Thanks for your good wished love and i really like your style! ヽ(o^▽^o)ノ
I match you with... (っ^▿^)💨
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VIL SCHOENHEIT
First of all, when we look at the zodiac and MBTI features, you are quite compatible. You're both Aries, so you two are stubbornly committed to your goals as possible. What I would say for INTJ and ENFJ is that you can help Vil when he has unnecessary emotional tantrums about himself and he gives you the long self-care conversations that you wish. Rather, you complement each other in terms of your needs, and that's something you both want and respect.
I see some "haters to lovers" among you, Because at first you thought Vil was needlessly selfish and different and he didn't like the way you stare at him even though you're beautiful and interesting JKLFGJKDFLGDF I think you respected him after the events of book 5 and you respected each other You started to know and love!
He likes your taste in clothes, I think he thinks it reflects the sweetness of your introverted personality. Apart from that, he likes that you care about himself, give importance to him and your commitment to life. He always feels so happy and proud when talking about your commitment to your goals together. But even if he doesn't admit it, his favorite feature about you is that you are understanding and more relaxed, making him feel at peace with himself no matter what <3
I think the problem with your relationship is that you sometimes stay away from long-term goals and he is sometimes overly obsessed. Because he wants the best for you, he wants his goals to be long-focused and you want him to relax and not be so hard on himself, which causes fights between you. But at the end of the day, because you realize that the things you fight for are the value you give yourself, you put your pride aside and make peace.
Some of the memories i imagine for you two: A long night spent together at the mall, secretly making funny faces and laughing together while choosing a meal, Renting an arcade saloon for you one night and playing arcade for you laughing together until the morning even though he normally cares about your and his sleep a lot, and "You're Slaying today too, my queen" words given to each other :D
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kazuwhora · 2 years
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MATCHUP COMMISSION — @gettingibbywithit
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As an ENFJ, Oikawa is technically speaking one of your best matches. INFJ and ENFJ share an intuitive balance between their thoughts and feelings, one that allows for a relationship based on strong idealistic expectations for one another that blossoms into a deeply rooted connection between you. While you can be social in the right settings, Oikawa takes the pressure off your back, encouraging you to only contribute what you WANT to contribute of your social battery while he takes the lead so you can feed off of him.
Further along into your relationship, and as is the case with any relationship in existence, problems are naturally going to occur. However, the nature of your relationship means plenty of open communication about your feelings, and serious fights seldom happen between you.
Further along into your relationship, and as is the case with any relationship in existence, problems are naturally going to occur. However, the nature of your relationship means plenty of open communication about your feelings, and serious fights seldom happen between you.
One thing Oikawa does that you never realize, is he observes you. He makes it feel natural— if you catch him staring from across the room, he’ll come and tuck a strand of your hair behind your ears and tell you it’s fallen. Mostly, he watches what you read, and he watches your reactions to what you’re reading. You wont notice it, but every time you put one of your romance novels away and head to shower before bed, Oikawa will sneak across the room, pick it up, and find exactly what is making you smile. He’ll then bank that information in the back of his mind, only to plan a recreation of whatever scene or moment made you blush. (Though you’ll have to expect a cocky and praise-driven demeanour once you react to his gesture— he loves to pretend it’s entirely his doing)
All in all, your relationship with Oikawa is one of harmony and balance. You each tend to each other’s needs with little to no thought— its automatic and driven by the deep understanding you both have for one another, and it’s effortless.
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On the complete opposite end of the spectrum is you and Tsukishima. Tskushima is the complete opposite of you, but as they say, opposites attract!
As an INTJ, Kei is seeking meaningful connections through a shared intellectual wavelength. For many feeler personality types, this might be difficult to reach, but for an INFJ who specializes in understanding the patterns and the desires of the people around them, this is no problem. What this ends up leading to however, is you filling the role in his life that allows him to open up and accept his feelings, or even understand them in the first place.
While you may not let feelings drive you into instability, you’re able to identify and cater to what Kei is experiencing without needing him to directly tell you or explain what’s going on inside his brain. This is a HUGE thing for him, seeing as how he’s very rarely had someone who sees past his cold shell and actually wants him to be open and vulnerable. Your relationship is based on this struggle— the “I can fix him” trope where instead of fixing him, you just want to help him and bring him to a place where he doesn’t have to force himself to be bitter all the time. He’s like a cup of slightly burnt coffee, and you’re the cream and sugar to lighten up the edge with some softness.
While both relationships are drastically different in dynamic, the one shared value is your love language. Both Oikawa and Kei appreciate quality time the most, and are happiest to provide that as well. Oikawa will take you to dinner, take you shopping, make dinner with you or sit beside you and talk while you take a bath after a long day at work, while Kei will ask to watch you crochet, and build a small army of all the tiny animals you’ve made that sits in the corner of his desk.
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Late happy birthday Chloe! 🎂
For the celebration: 🍪
About me: INTJ female, fluent in sarcasm and irony, a little harsh around the edges but generally kind and helpful. Perhaps a bit to reserved and impartial at times which makes me look uninterested in people. Always trying to keep my cool and with tendency to overanalyze everything. Perfect mix of a daydreamer and night thinker. Imagination and planning are my greatest assets. On the dark side, I can be passive and indifferent, and I'm very self conscious when it comes to my look. And I got my walls high.
Thank you so much for the bday wishes! <3 And thank you for requesting (adding the marvel and dc fandoms)! I had a lot of fun with this, I hope you enjoy the matchup! <3333
Marvel;
Bucky Barnes:
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🐺 You were part of the Avengers when Bucky joined (pretending Civil War never happened), a lot of the Avengers took a long time to warm up to Bucky, and it was the same for you too, but you grew to like him a bit, he was pretty handsome and all
🐺 You felt like Bucky was a bit like you in the regards of being a bit reserved and indifferent, you wanted Bucky to feel safe in the tower, so you gained the courage to talk to him; it took a while, after over-thinking a bit and even backing out a few times, you made you way over to him
🐺 Bucky was a bit defensive and wary of you, and it took him a while to actually reply to you when you awkwardly welcomed him to the team
🐺 The two of you didn't talk to each other at all after that, not even when passing by each other or making coffee in the kitchen; but slowly, very slowly, did both your walls come down when you realized that the other wasn't a threat
🐺 It started off pretty slow, making coffee for Bucky when he woke up or Bucky would save you a seat at the table during breakfast, lunch, or dinner
🐺 Before long, you began to grow feelings for Bucky, becoming a bit overwhelmed at the realization as you began to overthink everything again; what you didn't know was Bucky was feeling the same
🐺 Steve had noticed this, cause he is so in tuned with his best friend, and talked to Bucky about his feelings for you since they were obvious to ol' Stevie, in which Bucky first tried to ignore, until Steve really spoke to him about it, telling him to ask you out on a nice date or just confess his feelings to you already
🐺 Easier said than done, was all Bucky could say to himself, his own insecurities getting the best of him
🐺 When Bucky did confess to you, it was nerve-racking and anxiety-attack central, but when he did tell you, his voice quiet yet deep, you were overjoyed firstly; though you began to question why he would like you, Bucky helped you stop your worrying, taking your hands in his, telling you that he was in fact in love with you
🐺 You really couldn't be happier, being with the man of your dreams, someone you day dreamed about and thought about at night when you couldn't sleep, you were so happy he returned your feelings and you couldn't wait for the future
--
DC;
Richard Grayson:
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🐦 You were a pretty recent addition to the Teen Titans, having an amazing power that you had to join them, as Batman didn't really say, he was more serious about it, and he really didn't call your powers 'awesome' but you thought maybe he did like them enough to let you join the group
🐦 When you joined, it was pretty awkward, having no super friends and everyone just staring at you when you first started there, it was like being a transfer student in those terrible teen movies, having to stand in front of the class and tell everyone about yourself
🐦 Well, minus really talking about yourself, most of the team was a bit apprehensive of you, and you were the same with them, not fully really trusting them yet either; you knew it was going to take a while for you to warm up to them individually
🐦 And it did take a while, a good couple of months for each person, but that last person you befriended was Wonder Boy, also known as Dick Grayson; well, you didn't have the pleasure to call him Dick yet, still on Richard which was slightly odd when everyone else called him Dick
🐦 Dick was very dull and meh when he was around you, you being still sort of a new person and part of the team, he still didn't know what to make of you, and sort of didn't trust you, but if his dad, Bruce, thought you were good enough to join, and trustworthy enough, then you must be a good person
🐦 You thought Dick was pretty rude, especially to you during missions as the Teen Titans, which you didn't really care for, and you could only deal with for so long, it wasn't long until you broke and told him to stop being so mean; he was shocked nonetheless, and from then on, hadn't been so disrespectful to you and actually treated you as a member of the team
🐦 Over time, Dick began to grow fond of you, getting that giddy feeling he hadn't felt since Amy, which shocked him, making him sort of avoid you slightly; you noticed this and wanted to know what was up, but you didn't really say anything, but you did stay up thinking about Dick, realizing that you were doing that a lot lately, and slowly realizing yourself that you liked the bird vigilante (you even knew that he hated pineapple on pizza, you were in love)
🐦 It then took another long while until either of you fessed up, the rest of the team realizing something was up by all the awkward and shy glances the two of you were sharing often, so Starfire was going to do something about these untold feelings
🐦 She did her job and succeeded, making the two of you "meet her" at the roof of their headquarters, only for you and Dick to be there by yourselves, and to say it was awkward... It was awkward; it took some anxiety-filled small talk to get Dick to just blurt out that he likes you
🐦 You couldn't help but smile, staring down at the world below as you kicked your legs as they hung off the building, slowly, you confessed your feelings for the young man too, as slowly, slowly his fingers intertwined with yours
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zenki-soukokq · 2 years
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Hi!
I loved the match up you did for me with gorou, I couldn't stop smiling while reading it and it was so perfect
If its ok to ask for a second one, I'd like to request another romantic match-up for bungo stray dogs
Here's my Info again:
I’m non-binary and I use all pronouns, but most times i like to lean towards they/them. I'd like to be referred to as Mika.
I’m pansexual but I’d like to be matched up with a male since most of my favs are male
I'm afab and I'm 171 cm tall. I have pale skin and green eyes, and long eyelashes that I'm very proud of. I have really light brown and curly hair, and i had it cut short in a pixie cut, but its started to grow a bit at the back. I have an athletic body shape, and I prefer to wear a binder to appear more androgynous even though I have a small chest size. I'm considering getting top surgery though. My style is dark Akademiya and alt depending on how i feel.
My personality type is INTJ 5w6, I’m similar to Diluc and Scaramouche the most. I come off as cold and unwelcoming to most people at first and I'm very closed off, but I’m very warm and chaotic once you get to know me. I have a hard time talking to others because I’m very shy, but I’m loud, chaotic and teasing to people I’m comfortable with, more like Heizou and Childe. I also heavily relate to Dazai, Akutagawa and Atsushi. I value loyalty and comfort above all else, and I try my best to make sure the people I care about know this even though I have a hard time at expressing how I feel. I speak through actions rather than words. I also have some autistic traits.
I don’t really have a main aesthetic, but recently my style has been more dark Akademiya. I like to appear well-dressed in button-ups, turtlenecks, slacks and trench coats. I also really like flannel, my favourite colour is red although i own several in many colours.
I tend to have a saviour complex, I want to be a detective when I’m older and use my brain to help others.
As for hobbies, I’m an artist and musician. I’m very picky with my tools and prefer to work digitally with the best programs and brushes I can get my hands on. My work has no meaning, I just draw what I like and what appeals to me. I draw for my friends on their birthdays. I use art to show that I care, putting lots of work to draw a character my friends care about is how I show that I care, I want to take time and effort to show them that I care. I can play the guitar and sing and dance too. Sometimes i compose and write songs. I also love reading in my spare time, I’m a maladaptive daydreamer, and spend a lot of time immersing myself in fictional worlds.
For a romantic partner, I see the personality above all else. I have no preference for gender, as long as they’re someone gentle and loyal. I also love a good sense of humour
My love languages are quality time and physical touch (giving and receiving), since I’m very touch-starved, I like to be physically close to my loved ones. But i overthink a lot, so I also like to be reassured that my partner cares. I don’t have much experience in relationships, but I’m a hopeless romantic.
You have been matched up with...Atsushi Nakajima!
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"You've got the wrong idea. I'm not strong, and I'm not popular. In fact, my entire life has been cursed. I know full well how you feel, envying and hating everyone around you." — Atsushi to Lucy
How you two met:
A new case at the detective agency has been assigned to Atsushi, and he has been instructed to look out for "a sprouting new detective" on the scene. When Atsushi arrives, he can't help but curse Dazai for his horrible ability of describing people, until someone from behind taps him on the shoulder.
Atsushi was glancing around the area, searching for someone he had no idea how to identify
He didn't have to look for long, though, as he felt a couple of light taps on his shoulder
He turned himself around, and saw you, staring at him, almost dauntingly
He jumped back a little, in shock
You walked towards him, and asked him if he was ready to start the investigation
Albeit quite nervously, he said yes, and the two of you began to work together on the case
Two things had happened at this place- one stolen artifact, and one murdered person
Atsushi didn't really know where to start, but he was able to do two things- connect the murder to the stolen artifact
The person seemed to be wearing an outfit related to the facility, although it was hard to tell what part
The artifact stolen was an antique mirror, and the reasons behind the theft were also largely unknown
Both of you had very little to work with in terms of investigation and deduction, but you were able to notice some key details
There were small wooden shavings strewn around some spots of the room, and they seemed to fit the description of the type of wood used on the mirror
On the victim as well, there were a couple of small chipped pieces of wood
From this, you concluded that the mirror was definitely directly involved in the murder
You shared your deductions with Atsushi, and he recommended checking to see if there was any sort of path made by the wood, and there was
The two of you worked from there, and eventually came to the conclusion that the mirror was used as a weapon to physically impair the victim, and it eventually lead to his death due to a lack of immediate care
As for the culprit, that was for another day, as it had already gotten to be terribly late, and the two of you needed to head home
One night passed by, and Atsushi fell asleep with fairly pleasant thoughts. He had quite enjoyed working with you on the case so far, and looked forward to closing it off with you tomorrow. The next day came quicker than he could've thought, and he headed back to the site.
You were already hard at work, inspecting the area for any possible pointers on who the culprit could be
Atsushi had approached you, and greeted you with a quiet hello
You turned to him, and gave a light smile in response, before turning back to what you were inspecting
Atsushi felt quite happy with your response, and asked you what you were doing
As you pointed at the ground, you began to explain that there was a very light imprint on the carpet that didn't seem to match anyone's shoes, and that it was likely that these were the culprit's prints
He remembered seeing footprints elsewhere in the building, and went over to check if they were still there
Luckily for him, they led out to an exit in the building, and although there weren't any terribly obvious indicators of where the person went, he was still glad to have found another clue
A couple of hours had passed by, and more work was done, until you two were able to identify who had committed the crime
After the police were sent off to go find the person, he caught your attention before you began to leave
He approached you with a very light blush on his face, and with a visible nervousness to him
"This is definitely the worst place to tell you, but...I-I think I've fallen in love with you-! I know you might be weirded out by that, because we met yesterday and all, but please consider visiting me again, at least!"
Why you two are compatible:
"Suddenly, an idea came to me. A foolish idea that I can't get out of my mind. If I have any chance of saving them all, of returning them home safely, would that mean it's okay for me to keep on living?"
Your initially colder disposition might've put him off a bit, but as you two would spend more time together, he would really warm up to you a lot more
I don't know in what ways you relate to him, but I think he'd be very positively receptive of that, meaning that he would be very understanding about it
I think that his generally kind personality towards most people would pair well with your personality
His tendency to view people in absolutes is likely another reason that your relationship would work well
Atsushi would most likely see you in a morally righteous position, where he almost admires you for your want to save people
I think that with the way you would naturally warm up to him as the relationship progresses is probably another reason why the two of you would work well in a relationship together
I have a strong feeling that Atsushi's primary love language is also physical touch, primarily because of how he was raised
Although, I think he'd be receptive to any form of love
His personality as a whole generally seems like it would do well with yours
Relationship Headcanons:
Chances are, he's either trying to get you to join the Armed Detective Agency, or he's already succeeded in doing so
Working alongside you would probably make him quite happy
I think he might become a little dependent on you for a lot of things, but not in an unhealthy way
More so in a way where he now has someone he can almost completely latch onto without any worries
Whether or not you have an ability, he's probably still going to be incredibly fascinated by anything and everything that you do
Atsushi would definitely be interested in your artistic talents, and would constantly try to interact with/understand what you make
I believe that he fits very well into your ideal qualities in a partner
He'd most definitely be incredibly loyal to you, whether it be him willingly being nearby you at all times, protecting you, or something else
He'd be very gentle to, not only because it's in his nature, but also because he cares for you quite a bit
Atsushi seems like he would also be very appreciative of you, and would constantly be reassuring you, complimenting you, and generally just ensuring that you're comfortable
New Years Headcanons:
Atsushi was stuck at his desk, frustrated
He had been thinking things over for around a week now, and he still hadn't figured anything out for New Years
Sure, he had the basics, like some gifts and all that, but he couldn't think of anything special
Paired with that, is a stack of papers that he had to finish before he left work
He sighed, and began to slowly clear the papers, until he had an idea
He knew that he wouldn't be able to do anything terribly extravagant, but he knew that he could at least take you to see some attractions
Atsushi decided that once he was done with his work, he could take you out for dinner, and then he could work his way from there
With his newfound motivation, he cleared through the stack of papers, and went out on his way to take you to dinner
Once he had gotten to your home, he already had plans for what to do after
He would take you to get desserts, and then he would lead you off to a nice clearing where you could see the sky, completely undisturbed
Over dinner, he was excited, and cheerful
Afterwards, he took you to get crepes and various other sweets, and with boundless energy he took you across various parts of Yokohama
By the time he was finished, it was already quite late at night, with roughly an hour left until twelve
He took your hand, and grasped it tightly as he began to run towards the clearing
He stopped abruptly once he had arrived, and turned to you with a smile
"It looks like we arrived a bit early, but that's alright. We can spend more time together, because of that! Happy New Years, Mika- I really hope I made this day special for you."
Afterword:
I'm glad you enjoyed the Gorou matchup! I hope you enjoyed this one just as much! (Also, after reading this over, I just realized how it turned out a little long-)
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ORIGINAL CHARACTER         ⸻         ALISTER MARCUS SINCLAIR !
 /   ❝   INTRODUCTION   ─    
NAME:         alister marcus sinclair
⸻ ALISTER.          the name is of scottish origin and means "man's defender". this name was picked by his father because he wanted both his sons to have a name starting with the letter a. 
         • °. ─ PRONOUNCIATION /         al-ih-stare 
⸻ MARCUS.          the name is of latin origin and means "dedicated to mars". this name was given to him by his father and it is his father's name. 
        • °. ─ PRONOUNCIATION /         maa-kuhs
⸻ SINCLAIR.          the name is of latin origin and means "pure". this is the last name of his foster mother who adopted him when he was eleven. 
        • °. ─ PRONOUNCIATION /         sin-klair. 
NICKNAMES:
⸻ ACE.        his first foster family gave him him name ace which would later become a nickname. it was picked in relation to the deck of cards for number one and in relation to the song "one" by filter which his foster father was a fan of. the lyrics talk about how one is the loneliest number. this is cruel considering the paperwork mentioned how ace was a twin who was put up for adoption while his brother was kept by their parents. 
DATE OF BIRTH:       december 15th ( twenty five )
STAR SIGN:       sagittarius 
GENDER:        male ( he / him ) 
SEXUALITY:         closeted bisexual
BIRTHPLACE:         docklands, melbourne, australia 
LANGUAGES:         english & italian, latin 
( his mother is australian and his father is a mix of australian and italian. while he didn't learn itatlian till later in life, he taught himself italian and latin )
 /   ❝   PERSONA !   ─    
PERSONALITY:         
⸻ ace comes across as an asshole, wait no - he is an asshole. he is hard around the edges and tends to overstep quite often. someone who doesn't understand where the line between offence and joking is. the male is sarcastic, flirty, rude, and temperamental. his anger is like a light switch and it's almost deeply in natural due to suffering from trauma. he struggles with expressing his emotions into words - someone who can barely tell the people closest to them that he loves them but shows it in the acts of service that he does for them. the male has an iffy relationship with physical touch though. he can handle it if he was the one to touch them first but sudden touches out of nowhere from people trigger his fight response due to his childhood trauma. he is a hopeless romantic who notices the little things like what time of day, what you wore and the way you smelled the first time he kissed you but struggles to remember something like the exact moment he realized he loved them, because to him it all meshes together and its the little things that made him fall for a person. he has a bit of a need for approval and praise because he never heard it growing up and so he tends to attach himself to people who will tell him that he's doing an amazing job at something. he is complex but he is trying his best to be a good person, despite all the bad that has happened to him. it's an upwards battle but he wants to prove that he's better than the people who hurt him. 
MYERS BRIGGS:          intj - the architect 
⸻ STRENGTHS.        rational, informed, independent, determined, curious, original. 
⸻ WEAKNESSES.        arrogant, dismissive of emotions, overly critical, combative, socially clueless
LIKES:         cars. motorcycles, tattoos, latin, runes, boxing, spending time getting to know his twin. 
DISLIKES:        cooking, school, his photo being taken, his scars, his parents, people staring at him. 
HABITS:        tapping knee when he is annoyed or anxious, cracking his knuckles when it is nervous or angry. 
FEARS:        never being loved. enclosed spaces. 
ALLERGIES:        cat hair. 
MENTAL HEALTH:        depression, anxiety, anger issues, borderline personality disorder, rejection sensitivity dysphoria, post traumatic stress disorder.  
PHYSICAL HEALTH:        ace is perfectly healthy. 
OCCUPATION/CAREER:        alister works as a mechanic in the garage that he owns, though he went to college majoring in general surgery, he finished college and was accepted into medical school but decided to not go. he opened up his garage and has been working there fulltime since. 
 /   ❝   VISAGE   ─    
APPEARANCE:         alister was born with black hair that he tends to keep fairly short, slightly overgrown. his eyes are a deep medium brown shade. he has caucasian skin but it tans very easily due to his australian x italian heritage. he is considered fairly tall and has a muscular build. 
        • °. ─ FACECLAIM / matthew daddario 
        • °. ─ HEIGHT&WEIGHT / six foot three inches & eighty-nine kilos
MODE OF DRESS:         ace's style can be summed up as bad boy aesthetic. he prefers black clothing over everything but will sometimes spice it up with a flannel if he's feeling adventurous. 
BODY MODIFICATIONS:         he doesn't have any piercings but he has a lot of scars from years of abuse. when he turned eighteen, he began to get runes tattooed over the scars. 
GENERAL SCENT:         ace tends to smell like a mix of leather, musk, and mint. 
/   ❝   RELATIONS   ─   
FAMILY:         
⸻ MARCUS MERALDI.        father; the relationship between alister and his father isn't completely horrible but no where near healthy. he always regretted giving up alister for adoption but he stuck by his wife's side and so whenever it comes to ace, he just stays out of it which means that alister doesn't have a relationship with his father. 
⸻ ANNETTE MERALDI.        mother; the relationship between alister and his mother is non-existent. she gave alister up for adoption and wishes that he had stayed out of their lives. she is very cold towards alister and she refuses to accept him into her family. 
⸻ ADAM MERALDI/SINCLAIR.        twin brother; the relationship between alister and adam could of been iconic if their parents hadn't separated the two of them at birth. the two of them didn't meet till college and adam struggled for awhile to accept that he was not a only child while alister was eager to show that he could be a great brother. the two do end up becoming like best friends but it took a very long time. adam ends up pushing his parents aside and is actually taken in by andra to the point where adam feels comfortable changing his last name to hers as well. 
⸻ BLAIR CLARKE.        younger half-sister; the relationship between ace and blair was very strained at first due to ace feeling like suddenly he had another person to compete with for adam's attention but he slowly finds himself protective and soft towards his little sister. 
⸻ ANDRA SINCLAIR.        adopted mother; the relationship between alister and his adopted mother andra is extremely close. she came into his life when he was a broken down eleven year old and she helped him heal, letting him take his time. he is a massive mommy's boy, and he adores the woman. 
⸻ EVAH SINCLAIR.        adopted little sister; the relationship between alister and his sister evah is playful and protective. evah was only seven years old when ace was adopted, making her twenty one years old currently. he is very protective of her and she knows that she can come to him whenever. 
⸻ JAE SINCLAIR.        adopted little sister; the relationship between alister and his sister jae is extremely close. she was only two years old when ace was adopted, making her currently sixteen years old. she doesn't know a time when ace wasn't around. 
EXTENDED FAMILY:         
⸻ IMOGEN BENNETT.     cousin; the relationship between alister and imogen struggled to come into place at first because ace was extremely jealous of the close bond that imogen had with adam, he saw her as a threat but over time the two of them opened up towards each other and became pretty good friends. 
⸻ RAINE BENNETT.     cousin; the relationship between alister and raine never happened since she would die only a few years before he could meet her. she was imogen's twin. 
PETS:         
⸻ GUMDROP.     short haired grey cat ; despite being allergic to cat fur, ace grew up with a family cat that belonged to andra named gumdrop. she's a cuddly thing. she loves curling up on ace's lap and he often takes the allergy tablets whenever he goes to visit his mother and sisters. 
 /   ❝   BIOGRAPHY   ─ trigger warnings : abandonment, abuse ( physical & sexual ) identity theft
HOW THEIR PARENTS MET AND THE LEAD UP TO THEIR BIRTH:         
⸻ marcus and annette were both australian born and raised middle class people who came from hardworking families. the two of them would actually meet at work. the two of them both working in the blue collar jobs. his father was a truck driver while his mother was a cleaner. the two of them would meet at a bar one night after work while marcus was passing through melbourne on his way to sydney. the two of them spending all night chatting and talking having a pretty good connection. marcus would start stopping in melbourne more and more, for longer and longer during his drives. after about two years of this, he would end up moving to melbourne where the couple would rent a cheap house together. the two of them spoke about having children with the two of them agreeing that they wanted two or three children. so they began to try for a baby, it took them six months to concieve. they assumed that they were only having one baby which was preferred as they were unsure about how much work a baby would be. annette would go into labor at thirty nine weeks along. 
THEIR LIFE SO FAR:         
⸻  alister was born as the second born son of a pair of twins. the couple would be shocked by the arrival of alister as the ultrasounds never picked up on him hiding behind adam in the womb. they would debate it before giving up ace up adoptiion due to not being able to afford two kids. he would be in the foster care system for three years before being adopted by his first family. they were a couple that were visiting australia, so he would end up moving to america as a three year old. he would be abused in that household over the spam of the next eight years. they would beat him, burn him, starve him and one of the other boys that the couple had adopted for the paychecks would end up raping ace during the ages of eight to eleven. when he was eleven he would show up to school with a black eye and a teacher finally reported it to child protection services. during the home visit it was shown that he was severely underweight and a emotional mess, getting into fights and screaming whenever someone touched him. lashing out no matter who it was. he would be placed back into foster care but this time it didn't take long for him to be adopted again, this time by a woman named andrea sinclair who is a child psychologist. she noticed the signs of trauma and wanted to help him in a positive environment. when he was fourteen he would be helping tidy up andrea's office when he found his birth certificate where he would find out his full name. curiously, he would search up his brother's name only to find out that he had a identical twin brother. as if it was some sort of fate - adam and their parents had moved to america when the twins were ten years old. he would end up sneaking out of school early one day and travel to their house which was only four hours away. he wanted to reunite with his birth family having felt empty a lot growing up. but he was rejected at the front door by his mother. as a immature fourteen year old, he didn't think much of it but he began to pretend to be his twin brother whenever he knew that adam was out with friends or his girlfriend. he did it solely so that he could get attention from them. but it slowly took over his mind till he started to lose what little idea of his own identity that he had. he went on a mission to become the best son he could, throwing himself into his studies and sports - he hoped he could prove that he was someone they could be proud of but it seemed like nothing he did was good enough, constantly being rejected. when he was twenty four, he would finally reveal himself to adam. it didn't go to well at first when alister told him everything including how he had pretended to be adam from time to time but after hearing about how it was for a positive reason, adam slowly came around to the idea. alister has been working on his trauma for a long time trying to overcome the sense of rejection and pain of his childhood. he would start forming his own personality instead of copying adam's. he would drop out of medical school and open up a garage, as he had always loved breaking down cars and bikes before putting them back together. he would find out when he is twenty five, that he has another sibling. a girl named blair clarke who was a love-child from his father cheating on his mother about four months after ace and adam were born. she travels to america to meet her siblings after doing a 23andme test and matching with ace, stalking them on social media and then showing up to meet the brothers she was unaware of. 
/   ❝   MISC   ─    
EXTRA INFORMATION:         
⸻ ONE.      he has a IQ of 139 which is considered very gifted / advanced. one person out of 215 people have this IQ rating. 
⸻ TWO.       his foster mother andrea put him into piano lessons and he is quite talented at it but rarely plays in front of others. 
 ⸻ THREE.       he used to fight in an underground boxing association. 
PLAYLIST:        
⸻ "one" by filter".     
 " one is the loneliest number that you'll ever do"
⸻ "the monster" by eminem.       
" get along with the voice inside of my head. you're trying to save me, stop holding your breath"
⸻ "perfect" by simple plan.       
" i just want to make you proud i'm never gonna be good enough for you"
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ffsg0jo · 5 months
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Match ups?? Sign me up!
Id like to b matched up w a male character from jjk plz!!
My mbti is an INTP..or INTJ. That switches up from time to time, but the same 2 mbti! I like drawing, ANIMALS. EVERY ANIMAL. IDC., and i play the piano!! I dislike really loud environments, crowds, and being forced to open up!! Idk if needed, but i would do any activity/hobby/interests my s/o likes! And they say im a great listener and a very big yapper when it comes to my interests (my few close friends)
Id take any jjk male!! Teehee! Hope ya pick me ^^
-🗣
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Itadori:
Itadori 100% fell in love with you from the first moment he saw you. When you were first introduced to him, his face was as pink as his hair, and he turned into that one lego batman meme. He saw your future together and started thinking about a mortgage and everything. Safe to say, he was incredibly embarrassed after Megumi snapped him out of his stupor and finally spluttered out his name. The more he got to know you, the deeper he fell for you. He was careful not to push you, but he really enjoyed listening to you talk about animals. When he found out you played the piano, his heart stopped, and he knew he wanted to be with you for the rest of his life.
How he confesses to you:
He defo requires some encouragement from his peers, but eventually, he learns a simple little tune on the piano and writes you a (terrible) song confessing to you. It's more embarrassing, tbh but it's from the heart.
What it would be like dating Itadori:
Constantly stealing his hoodie and his sweatshirts because 1- they're so comfortable and 2- they always smell like him
He’s constantly finding new places and restaurants for you guys to go on dates and check out
He tries to learn to play the violin so you guys can be a cool little duet. He doesn’t get very far, but he can play hot cross buns pretty well!!
You’re both laying down on his bed, and he’s staring at you all starry and heart eyed, listening to you talk about all your interests. He has the cheesiest smile on his face.
Teaming up with Megumi whenever Itadori and Nobara get a little too annoying and loud in public and just leaving them to it.
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Inumaki:
Upon meeting Inumaki, he has never hated his cursed technique more. He wants to get to know you. He really really does, but there’s a whole language barrier to get over. You guys still talk and hang out a lot, but he wishes he could tell you how he feels properly. You don’t mind, and you’re so lovely towards him, which makes him fall for you even more. His heart melts at how understanding you are and how you’re always listening to him and paying attention to his cues. He knows Itadori likes you too, and part of him wants to back off. But no one’s ever made him feel this way before, and he so desperately wants to be yours.
How he confesses to you:
He writes you a handwritten letter containing all the thoughts and feelings he's never been able to verbalise and has yuuta help him sneak it into your dorm. You catch him in the act though, and he borderlines smacks the letter in your hands and legs it.
What it would be like dating Inumaki:
Cuddling every morning before you guys have to go and get ready for the day, just soaking in eachothers warmth.
Adopting a cute little doggo together and realising you can't have just one dog, so you adopt another one. And then you realise it would be really cool if you had a kitten too and next thing you know you guys have a mini farm.
Watching him play video games whilst sitting on his lap. He claims that you're his good luck charm, and he needs you next to him.
Matching outfits 100%. You guys are always complimenting each others outfits and you're so in sync sometimes it happens completely randomly and by accident.
He shares your dislike of loud environments and does his best to set up cute little dates at home, always catering to your needs.
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a/n: thank you so so much for sending a request in <33 lmk if you liked it and who you'd choose 😊
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The Mastermind & the Field Marshall
How I get along with ENTJs as an INTJ
As I met with Bobby for the first time in many years, “Hey how ya been?” I cautiously started. “Hi!! I’m good!” Bobby glowed out. “Awesome!” I matched. Driven for a more serious conversation, I added, “But listen. I wanna say I’m really sorry. I’ve been super busy.” “OK! Let’s go out and play!” Again I matched, “Great! Let’s do it then.” Still unsatisfied with our conversation, I furrowed my brows, “So how about playing for many days? It’s been a long time I haven’t seen you. I kinda know my way around outside. You’ll lead and I’ll guide yeah?” “YEAHH!!” It was no surprise for Bobby to be so readily receptive. While this would be the start of rekindling our relationship, I still felt guilty. I lowered my gaze and mustered, “I’m sorry.” “Huh?” “It’s complicated.” Scrounging for words for Bobby to understand, “Well I was afraid you’d get hurt. I thought it was best to keep you safe here. It’s just not a place for kids, ya know.” Detailing the complexities of reality was futile. Yet Bobby started to grasp what I was trying to say. “Was I bad?” He hesitated, “Does outside think I’m bad?” Bobby’s fainting glow was blanketed by a feeling I knew all too well. It’s the same feeling that used to rot my insides and scramble my thoughts. I thought I got rid of it until I realized I left it with Bobby. At that moment, we shared it.
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Cornered with nowhere to hide, I shriveled, “No… No, of course not. It-it’s my fault. I was trying to build a future for you. But I only built it for myself. They said we don’t get to be kids anymore. I thought I was doing the right thing, but I was wrong to — ” “ — Leave me here.” “Yeah. I thought I was protecting you but I left you,” I surrendered. “Growing up I couldn’t wait to be an adult. I never hated you. I was never ashamed of you. I was too scared.” Saying ‘scared’ out loud rendered me defenseless. I braced for any reaction Bobby would lash out. I couldn’t sink myself in anymore. Suddenly the guilt started to fade off. I started to feel… clear. And clearly, I had more to say. “Look, it’s different now. I don’t want to stay scared anymore. There’s some bad people, the world can be scary, and that’s OK. I love you and that’s all that matters. I know that now.” “Will they like me?” “Yes!” I reassured. “You’re my joy and I want to show the world why. I want them to know who you are.” Reaching the end of my spiel, I reiterated, “Who we are… Who we really are.” Wrapping my arms around him, I stared off into the distance at a future I’d never seen. A future for both me and myself. I was still scared. I worried about how I would be received. Savoring my warmth, Bobby looked up. “Hey.” “Yeah?” “I’m glad you’re here.” “Me too. I’m glad I’m here.”
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If you’re as old as I am at the ripe age of 37, you had this kind of conversation with yourself before. I’d even say you’ve visited your inner self more frequently and seriously than I have. Facts don’t care about my feelings. I find my place and be reasoned. It works the other way around for you, you have reasons. It’s your feelings that don’t care about facts.
If you don’t like how things are done, you as an Extraverted Thinking dominant will change them. Hence why you out of all the types are most sensitively aware how your actions reflect who you are as a person. So no, you’re not a sociopath. ENTJs thoroughly evaluate if their goals would truly make them happy before they set out to achieve them. You’re the living embodiment of “Be careful what you wish for.” You think through — not only logically but also — to ensure your heart is in the right place.
“In 1998, I lost my reputation and my dignity. I lost my sense of self. A marketplace has emerged where public humiliation is a commodity and shame is an industry. Anyone who is suffering from shame and public humiliation needs to know one thing: you can survive it. I know it’s hard. It may not be painless, quick or easy, but you can insist on a different ending to your story.” — Monica Lewinsky
There’s no doubt from you and anyone else when it is in that right place. Your emotions don’t need to be spoken, they’re felt by whoever pays attention. The ENTJs I know set their lives caring for their loved ones and do right by them. The best of you account for yourself and everybody else as a whole. Having “inferior” Introverted Feeling, you could overextend yourself for others to the point it’s self-sabotaging. Type descriptions fail to mention how you can genuinely be too unselfish. And that’s highly unfair.
While we’re at it, you’re not a commanding CEO of some mega-corporation. You take too much ownership of your life to depend on others. You’d rather work independently or lead a small posse, rolling up your sleeves getting shit done rather than preaching about synergy and company values. You don’t present detailed road maps nor devise contingency plans either. Introverted Intuition is a personal vision. It’s Plan A, the one and only plan. Company strategy around industry paradigm shifts is not part of Plan A. If anything, it’s in the way.
That’s all Ni is, a goal. It’s not some master plan where you know every step of the way for the next 20 years, for sure it’s not some crystal ball either. It feels more like a mortgage that you need to pay off in whatever way possible. It’s a chosen commitment of spending your days willing yourself to materialize your dreams. That journey of making periodic progress is what’s most fulfilling for ENTJs. It’s a pursuit of happiness.
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It’s a little different for me, Ni isn’t a vision that propels me to pursue whatever my heart desires. Introverted Intuition to me is an ocean. I’m floating on a watercraft that can shape shift into a cargo ship, a sailboat, or a surfboard. I forecast the weather to figure the best option to shape shift in order to better brace myself for the incoming storms. I like to stay afloat withstanding the changes in economic, social, and political climates.
Personally I’m a bit of a storm chaser sensing the winds, the clouds, the humidity, and all that sum up to form the storms. And what I’m looking for, more specifically, are the ones that make the best waves to surf. To be the best surfer I can be, I keep an eye on what the weather is doing and find those waves. The MBTI community thinks I have this mystical power to predict the future, I just understand enough about ocean storms and listen to what the weather indicators tell me. But you know who I think has superpowers? You.
“I think there’s something inside of you — and inside of all of us — when we see something and we think, ‘I think I can do it, I think I can do it. But I’m afraid to.’ Bridging that gap, doing what you’re afraid of, getting out of your comfort zone, taking risks like that — THAT is what life is. You might find out something about yourself that’s special. And if you’re not good, who cares? You tried something. Now you know something about yourself.” — Amy Poehler
You change the weather, split tectonic plates, and move mountains; doing whatever to create the waves you want. While I analyze forecasting outcomes, you bulldoze through making the outcomes happen. It’s fucking amazing. Who the hell decides they’re gonna control the weather?? When you want something bad enough, when you love something hard enough, you’ll go get it. Perhaps you feel your life could be better, perhaps the world could be better. Perhaps you feel other people deserve to enjoy surfing the waves too.
When I think about being industrious, I think about my parents who have tirelessly worked to give my brother and me a better future. Every morning, they prepared food and set tables for our restaurant. During off-business hours, they mopped the floors and restocked on groceries. They named me Robert because it works both in French, my native language, and English, for when we would set out for America. And we eventually did, as envisioned.
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Mom showed me articles about high achieving kids going to prestigious schools. She tried to inspire me by pointing out how aimless my eyes looked compared to theirs; that I should look more urgent. To be more like a boss, she used to say. She added if I wanted to be more like those kids, as well like Dad and herself, then I needed courage. I didn’t fully understand that until recently when I got to know some of you.
My life is a decision-making game of analyzing facts and managing risks. I’m pretty good at this game, but I don’t make the rules nor control the facts. What I can control are my emotions as I weigh my options based on their rewards and my confidence in them. Funny how that’s called making logical decisions when, really, I choose whichever I feel best about. That’s how I realized I trusted the facts more than I trusted myself. Not my brain, myself. Bobby hid behind the wall of logic.
“Chess isn’t always competitive. Chess can also be beautiful. It was the board I noticed first. It’s an entire world of just 64 squares. I feel safe in it. I can control it. I can dominate it. And it’s predictable, so if I get hurt, I only have myself to blame.” — Beth Harmon, from Queen’s Gambit
The world you build is an extension of who you are. People and things get affected, so what if it doesn’t turn out better? I was too perfectionist about what my world would be and shied away about what it is. I was afraid I wouldn’t like how it would turn out and how that would reflect back on who I am. Yet I hear you admitting how scared and afraid you are more times than I have. Maybe that’s part of the challenge for you. Whatever it is, watching you made me believe that I can do it too.
You showed me how to seize the day, round people up, and get shit done. I’ve watched you get better grades, earn more promotions, gain more respect, thrive in harsher conditions. All while also inspire others, party harder, have more fun, and even show more care for people. Why wait? Have courage and make it happen. Skills and talent not required.
We all have limited time here. We’re just trying to live an honest life being as good-hearted as we can. Live doing what you love and for who you love. I’ll build a whole island where the waves are better than I could’ve ever imagined. My future is to set Mom and Dad to enjoy their retirement years. I will take care of my family no matter what’s going on around the world. And for sure I will not let lack of courage be an excuse for my shortcomings.
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