#fine art insurance companies

[firstclassinsurance]

Artistic Treasures Secured: Fine Art Insurance Options in Florida

In the realm of art, every stroke, every curve, every piece holds a story, a sentiment, and an intrinsic value that transcends mere monetary worth. For collectors, artists, and admirers alike, these artistic treasures stand as testaments to human creativity, culture, and history. However, safeguarding these treasures isn't just about protecting their physical form; it's about preserving their essence, their significance. This is where fine art insurance steps in, offering a shield against the unforeseen and the unpredictable, ensuring that these treasures remain protected and cherished for generations to come.

In the vibrant state of Florida, renowned for its artistic dynamism and cultural richness, the need for comprehensive fine art insurance solutions is paramount. Enter FirstClassIns.com, a beacon of reliability and expertise in the realm of insurance, offering tailored and robust insurance options specifically designed for the fine art insurance florida.

Understanding the Value of Fine Art Insurance

Fine art insurance isn't just another financial safeguard; it's a meticulous craft that takes into account the nuances of art valuation, preservation, and risk management. For collectors, artists, galleries, museums, and even emerging art enthusiasts, having the right insurance coverage means more than just financial reimbursement; it means the assurance that their passion, investment, and legacy are safeguarded.

FirstClassIns.com recognizes the unique needs of the Florida art community, understanding that the diverse range of artworks, from contemporary masterpieces to classical artifacts, requires specialized insurance solutions. With a deep understanding of the intricacies of the art world, they offer comprehensive coverage that extends beyond standard insurance policies.

Tailored Solutions for Florida's Artistic Landscape

Florida's artistic landscape is as diverse as its population, encompassing a wide spectrum of art forms, from fine art and sculpture to avant-garde installations and culturally significant artifacts. FirstClassIns.com recognizes this diversity and offers specialized insurance plans that cater to these distinct genres and forms of art.

1. Customized Coverage for Various Art Forms

Whether it's protecting a valuable collection of paintings, sculptures, photography, or rare artifacts, First Class provides tailored insurance solutions that consider the uniqueness of each piece. Their policies are designed to encompass the specific risks associated with different art forms, ensuring comprehensive protection against damage, theft, transit risks, and more.

2. Expert Risk Assessment and Valuation

Valuing art is an intricate process that requires expertise and finesse. It collaborates with seasoned art appraisers and experts who understand the nuances of art valuation. Their in-depth knowledge ensures accurate assessment and valuation of artworks, providing clients with the confidence that their pieces are appropriately insured based on their true value.

3. Specialized Coverage for Exhibitions and Events

Art exhibitions and events are integral to Florida's vibrant art scene. It also offers specialized coverage for these occasions, providing comprehensive insurance solutions that safeguard artworks on display, during transit, and throughout the duration of the event, mitigating risks associated with public showcases.

Why Choose FirstClassIns.com?

First Class Ins isn't just an insurance provider; it's a trusted partner dedicated to preserving the essence and significance of artistic treasures. Their commitment to understanding the specific needs of the Florida art community sets them apart:

Expertise: With a team well-versed in art insurance intricacies, they offer unparalleled expertise and guidance.

Tailored Solutions: Their bespoke insurance plans cater to the diverse range of art forms prevalent in Florida.

Client-Centric Approach: Understanding the unique requirements of each client, they craft personalized insurance solutions that prioritize individual needs.

In conclusion, the realm of fine art demands more than just conventional insurance coverage. It requires a nuanced understanding of art's value, significance, and the associated risks. FirstClassIns.com stands as a stalwart guardian, ensuring that Florida's artistic treasures remain secured, cherished, and celebrated for generations to come. With their specialized expertise and tailored solutions, they embody the essence of safeguarding artistic legacies, making them the premier choice for fine art insurance in Florida.

[jodipickens]

We under value and take for granted artists as a society. I’m talking all artists…writers, actors, musicians, dancers, designers, painters, sculptors…the list is endless.

The commonality is that they all have either spent their time honing their skills through practice, lessons, education or all of the above. Artists dedicate their time and often their lives to their craft.

We are failing our artists. Symphony orchestras are failing across the US. Writers and actors are on strike. People involved in the fine arts are turning to independent sales. We need to shift our expectations.

We need creatives as a part of our society. What we don’t need is the expectation that artists should work for free or for a paltry income. Simply because an artist enjoys performing or creating doesn’t mean they should have to do so for nothing.

We also no longer live in an era where it is standard that the extremely wealthy build museums or libraries or fund performing arts groups. We live in an era of amassing extreme wealth for the minority of the population.

I get that profitability is important, but at what cost? Are we ok that artists can’t afford health insurance? Are we ok that artists are leaving our communities for other opportunities? Are we ok that companies are ready to use AI over humans for creative processes and performance?

I’m not ready for any of this. We will lose a significant part of our humanity by eliminating and discouraging the ability to thrive for artists. Change can be hard but change is what is needed.

We are experiencing the beginning of a labor revolution and it will not stop with our writers, actors, UPS drivers or Starbucks baristas. The peasants are fed up and the nobility needs to pay attention.

Support your local artists. Support independent artists. Support the striking unions and organizations. We can all play a part in creating a long lasting effective change.

#WGAstrong #SAGAFTRAstrong #Unionstrong #BeLoud

[galaxygolfergirl]

Watcher's Expenses

I didn't major in accounting: I took three classes and it grinded my brain to a fine powder. However, after graduating with a business admin degree, being a former eager fan of their videos, and from a cursory glance over their socials, there's a lot to consider in their spending behavior that really could start racking up costs. Some of these things we've already noticed, but there are other things I'd like to highlight, and I'll try to break it down into the different categories of accounting expenses (if I get something wrong, let me know. I was more concentrated in marketing 🤷‍♀️). I'm not going to hypothesize numbers either, as that would take out more time than I'm willing to afford-- you can assume how much everything costs. Anyways, here's my attempt at being a layman forensic accountant:

Note: All of this is assuming they're operating above board and not engaging in any illegal practices such as money laundering, tax evasion, not paying rent, etc.

Operating Expenses

Payroll: 25+ staff salaries and insurance

Overhead Expenses

CEO/founder salaries

Office space leasing or rent (In L.A, one of the most expensive cities in the US)

Utilities (water, electricity, heating, sanitation, etc.)

Insurance

Advertising Costs

Telephone & Internet service

Cloud Storage or mainframe

Office equipment (furniture, computers, printers, etc.)

Office supplies (paper, pens, printer ink, etc.)

Marketing costs (Social media marketing on Instagram, Youtube, SEO for search engines, Twitter, etc. Designing merchandise and posters, art, etc. )

Human Resources (not sure how equipped they are)

Accounting fees

Property taxes

Legal fees

Licensing fees

Website maintenance (For Watchertv.com, Watcherstuff.com, & Watcherentertainment.com)

Expenses regarding merchandising (whoever they contract or outsource for that)

Inventory costs

Potentially maintenance of company vehicles

Subsequent gas mileage for road trips

Depreciation (pertains to tangible assets like buildings and equipment)

Amortization (intangible assets such as patents and trademarks)

Overhead Travel and Entertainment Costs (I think one of the biggest culprits, evident in their videos and posts)

The travel expenses (flights, train trips, rental cars, etc. For main team and scouts)

Hotel expenses for 7-8 people at least, or potentially more

Breakfasts, lunches and dinners with the crew (whether that's fully on their dime or not, I don't know; Ryan stated they like to cover that for the most part)

Recreational activities (vacation destinations, amusement parks, sporting activities etc.)

The location fees

Extraneous Overhead costs (not sure exactly where these fall under, but another culprit, evident in videos and posts)

Paying for guest appearances

Expensive filming & recording equipment (Cameras, sound equipment, editing software subscriptions, etc.)

The overelaborate sets for Ghost files, Mystery Files, Puppet History, Podcasts etc. (Set dressing: Vintage memorabilia, antiquated tech, vintage furniture, props, etc.)

Kitchen & Cooking supplies/equipment

Office food supply; expensive food and drink purchases for videos

Novelty items or miscellaneous purchases (ex. Ghost hunting equipment, outfits, toys, etc.)

Non-Operating Expenses

These are those expenses that cannot be linked back to operating revenue. One of the most common examples of non-operating expenses is interest expense. This is because while interest is the cost of borrowing money from a creditor or a bank, they are not generating any operating income. This makes interest payments a part of non-operating expenses.

Financial Expenses

Potential loan payments, borrowing from creditors or lenders, bank loans, etc.

Variable Expenses

Hiring a large amount of freelancers, overtime expenditure, commissions, etc.

PR consultations (Not sure if they had this before the scandal)

Extraordinary Expenses

Expenses incurred outside your company’s regular business activities and during a large one-time event or transactions. For example, selling land, disposal of a significant asset, laying off of your employees, unexpected machine repairing or replacement, etc.

Accrued Expenses

When your business has incurred an expense but not yet paid for it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(If there's anything else I'm missing, please feel free to add or correct things)

To a novice or a young entrepreneur, this can be very intimidating if you don't have the education or the support to manage it properly. I know it intimidates the hell out of me and I'm still having to fill in the gaps (again, if I've mislabeled or gotten anything wrong here, please let me know). For the artistic or creative entrepreneur, it can be even harder to reconcile the extent of your creative passions with your ability to operate and scale your business at a sustainable rate. That can lead to irresponsible, selfish, and impulsive decisions that could irreparably harm your brand, which is a whole other beast of its own.

My guess at this point is that their overhead and operation expenses are woefully mismanaged; they've made way too many extraneous purchases, and that they had too much confidence in their audience of formerly 2.93 million to make up for the expenses they failed to cover.

It almost seems as if their internal logic was, "If we make more money, we can keep living the expensive lifestyle that we want and make whatever we want without anyone telling us we can't, and we want to do it NOW, sooner rather than later because we don't want wait and compromise our vision." But as you can see, the reality of fulfilling those ambitions is already compromised by the responsibility of running a business.

And I wrote this in another post here, but I'll state it again: Running a business means you need to be educated on how a business can successfully and efficiently operate. Accounting, marketing, social media marketing, public relations, production, etc; these resources and internet of things is available and at your disposal. If they had invested more time in educating themselves on those aspects and not made this decision based on artistic passion (and/or greed), they would have not gotten the response they got.

Being a graphic designer, I know the creative/passionate side of things but I also got a degree/got educated in business because I wanted to understand how to start a company and run it successfully. If they’re having trouble handling the responsibility of doing that, managing production costs, managing overhead expenses, and especially with compensating their 25+ employees, then they should hire professionals that are sympathetic to their creative interests, but have the education and experience to reign in bad decisions like these.

Anyways, thanks for coming to my TedTalk. What a shitshow this has been.

[southeastasianists]

When the Manila Metropolitan Theater (abbreviated as MET) was formally opened on December 10, 1931, it was considered the country’s first national theater. In 1973, it was inscribed as a National Historic Landmark. The National Museum of the Philippines declared it a National Culture Treasure in 2010 because it’s a unique, well-preserved Art Deco building of an outstanding size in Asia.

It hasn't been always been in the limelight since its opening. Before it re-acquired its stature as the "Grand Dame of Manila," the building has suffered. The MET was damaged during the 1945 Battle of Manila and was used for various purposes in the following years—as a boxing gym, a seedy motel, a gay bar, a basketball court, a garage, and a warehouse. It was restored under the auspices of Imelda Marcos in 1978 and then shuttered again in 1996 due to conflicts of ownership between the City of Manila and the government insurance company that sponsored its restoration. 

A government arm, the National Commission for Culture and the Arts (NCCA) bought the theater from the the government insurance company in 2015 and started restoration work in February 2017. After its most extensive public restoration efforts, the MET reopened on December 10, 2021—90 years after its inauguration

The building was designed by a Filipino architect Juan M. Arrelano, who had to undertake additional studies in the United States to learn theater design, as he had previously specialized in Neoclassical buildings. His earlier works include the nearby National Museum of Fine Arts, Manila Post Office, and Jones Bridge.

The MET is known for its Art Deco design, but Arrelano made sure that Filipino decorative elements were incorporated throughout the building: batik patterns of the southern Mindanaon regions, capiz lamps, and banana leaf pillars. It gets better when you look up at the ceiling of the main theater, which is embellished with mangoes, bananas, and tropical leaves.

[fromtenthousandfeet]

KPJMs Let Nothing Slide

Hooray! An exhibition for Jimin is coming soon to Seoul! It's nice to see Jimin getting a little bit of what Jungkook gets. That said, what the heck is up with that poster?????

The minute the announcement was made, Korean Jimin fans were all over X/Twitter complaining about the poster. There's lots of frustration about how small Jimin's name is. One person likened it to the fine print on an insurance policy. That gave me a laugh.

And can we talk branding? Why make an exhibition announcement that visually has nothing to do with the content? No picture of Jimin, but also no references to the branding of either album. Not the same color story, not the same typeface, truly nothing. What's with the random Art Deco theme? Can we all agree it's just bad? They did it for Jungkook, so why not for Jimin?

Truth be told, I don't like the cover(s) of MUSE, either. It screams cheap to me (only one color ink used for the text and image), but I'll keep that to myself.

Does BigHit call on the janitor to do Jimin's graphic design work?

The good news is, Jimin's talented fandom is already doing the company's work for them. This effort needs its own hashtag, btw.

P.S. Listen to Serendipity and Lie today in honor of their recent 8 and 7 year anniversaries. Both songs are just so amazing.

[inqorporeal]

You know what sucks?

Back in the 90s I asked my parents what a reasonable "adult" wage was for supporting oneself. They said $75k a year.

In 1998.

It's 2024 and I can't find a single entry level position that offers better than $38k. And it would have to be an entry level position because while I have degrees, I have no experience.

$38k doesn't pay the bills and I'm lucky to have a roommate I like and get along well with, because living solo, the expenses are even higher.

If I'm not being ghosted, I'm being sent form rejections from no-reply emails. It's getting to the point where I'm debating picking up bar or stagehand work and covering the difference with art commissions, but a lack of consistent schedule is not great for my ADHD brain, and if I can't get health insurance, the cost of my meds quadruples or more.

I hate this place. Every time I start to think it would be perfect if we could just get them to pay us fairly, they go and engage in shady business that makes me wonder how this company hasn't been sued or investigated by a federal bureau. I've been talking to the IWW but this is a right to work state, and upper management, I'm sure, would be fine with replacing us for asking for a raise.

Maybe we can lean on Harris and Walz about a UBI initiative. Like, if tyour company wants to pay its staff below the living wage of where they're expected to work (my company is in the suburbs but my shop is in central Chicago, so it would be gauged on the shop location and not the company), you owe extra taxes for UBI support. Something like that. IDFK.

[len-yx]

Headcanons from the racer hoyofair art lol

Navia’s car/she’s the racer. Aether is part of her pit crew and Lumine is a race engineer. Paimon is “emotional support” and Charlotte is still a reporter

The car is Diluc’s but him and Ningguang usually both take part in races they just have the same sponsor(s) and their pit crews will sometimes have the same people in them. Keqing is Ningguang’s race engineer and bennette is (mainly) a part of Diluc’s pit crew.

The car is Dehya’s and Nilou is her race engineer. Shenhe is pretty clearly part of the pit crew. Yelan isn’t clearly doing anything so I’ve decided that the company she’s part of is Denhya’s current sponsor.

The car here is Venti’s but Albedo is also racers and Tighnari is a reserve driver (emergency sub) (don’t ask me for who I don’t think that much) and Kaveh would clearly be part of some kind of pit crew. Probably for whoever Tighnari’s a reserve driver for since the crews seem to have atleast one person from the same nation as another member.

Lynette is obviously a driver but the car in the back doenst suit her so I’ve decided it’s Ei’s and it was just the closest car for press photo’s. Kirara obviously the starter. I think Yae would be an announcer. I have NO idea what Clorinde would do, I would think she’d be a racer but she isn’t dressed right for it… maybe she’s part of Lynette’s crew idk.

The race was super hectic, there was more than just 8 racers but I’m too lazy to make up others.

Lynette wipes out badly on her second lap, her car was like totally fucked, so was her arm. I’m talking like, bone sticking out of elbow, nerves completely messed up. She has health insurance tho so it’s fine 👍👍 Freminet ran from the stands to check on her and Lyney was already there since he’s her race engineer. But besides her arm she just had cuts and bruises and the crash was off the track so the race continued.

The placing was something like:

1st place Venti, 2nd place Ningguang, 3rd place Dehya, 4th place Diluc, 5th place Navia, 6th place Albedo, everyone else, and then Lynette

Oh wait I said Ei was a racer uhhhhhhh she placed between Dehya and Diluc. Sure.

[ibroughtyoumybullets]

very funny how i continue to go on the internet and expect to see well though, reasonable responses like some kind of fool. do i think watcher jumping to SVOD at this moment in time is a good idea? no, not really. i don’t think they quite have the streaming numbers or appropriate primary age demographic for it to work out. i also don’t think they put out enough content at the moment for it to be worth it (forgive the pun) for most people. i think they could have pivoted more slowly, outlined their plan further out from its implementation, and considered other non-youtube options instead of doing this.

i also think it’s really silly how people will bitch and moan about google’s monopoly on video hosting and the increasing nanny-state sanitization of the internet in an effort to appeal to advertisers who want every single piece of media to be palatable for people ages 03-99+, and then when a company does attempt to get around that because they have some basic artistic integrity people become furious that they aren’t being spoon fed content for free and on demand.

i have seen a good amount of responses that boil down to “oh i can’t afford that. that sucks. good luck guys!” and that’s a perfectly normal way to react. like you can be sad about not being able to afford content you enjoy. i would feel the same way and don’t see anything wrong with that.

but it’s so laughably out of touch to act like a company pivoting their revenue source so they can free themselves from under advertisers thumbs is … a scam? scummy? somehow #problematic? it doesn’t even make sense. not everything you don’t like that inconveniences you is cancellable. join the real world.

ultimately with what little knowledge i have i get the feeling they expanded too much too fast and are now trying to fix that without having to do lay offs / cancel future plans. i have, honestly, wondered why they have so many people on staff? it certainly must make everybody’s lives easier within the company but i don’t know if i think that, or their (admittedly very very cool) offices and super fancy sets, were necessary from the get go. i think they were used to a certain standard of production coming from buzzfeed, sought to recreate that in their own company, and came to realize they just straight up can’t afford to maintain that within their current business model. and that sucks. i and a lot of other people are definitely fine with, or even prefer in some ways, a less polished standard of production but it’s clear that they Don’t and the art they want to make goes beyond dudes in a car with blue and yellow text on a screen. they are all adults with established careers - that’s perfectly logical.

ultimately i don’t even know if i’ll sub. i’ll probably test run it. they’ve made a lot of content i enjoy over the years and would like to give them a chance. do i think it will work out in the long run? no. but it definitely won’t work if people act like wanting to pay their bills and give their employees health insurance is a crime and strike them from the public record of Perfect and Awesome Creators Who Will Never Fail Us On Pain Of Death.

but also maybe i need to stop looking for level headed nuance on tunglr dot come

[uwmspeccoll]

Publishers' Binding Thursday

This fine Thursday, I'm sharing a little love! This book is Persuasions to Joy: An Anthology of Elizabethan Love Lyrics, edited by British-born insurance agent and resident of Green Bay, WI Earl E. Fisk and decorated by British army officer, illustrator, and art critic Haldane Macfall. It was printed for George H. Doran Company in 1927.

This book is comprised of a group of Elizabethan love poems and some sweet illustrations, some of which include birds! It also includes an inscription from Fisk to Austin Lutter, whose name you may remember from our posts on the Limited Editions Club editions of Shakespeare's plays, since he is the one who donated them (and this book, and many others) to our collection. It reads: "For Austin Lutter who is not only a good insurance man but a lover of good books, this little book of love. Earl E. Fisk, January 5th, 1928."

The cover is covered in printed paper with a green cloth spine. The paper is printed with a rose and cross/spindle/wheel design in green and black. The cover appears to have also been decorated by Macfall.

View more Publishers' Binding Thursday posts.

-- Alice, Special Collections Department Manager

[firstclassinsurance]

Jewelry Business Insurance - arts insurance

In the vibrant realm of artistic expression, your jewelry creations are more than mere products; they are works of art. Jewelry business insurance recognizes and safeguards the artistic and financial value of your pieces, offering protection against a range of potential risks. Whether you operate a boutique studio, a retail store, or an online platform, this insurance provides a safety net that extends from the crafting bench to the display case.

Coverage typically includes protection against theft, damage, or loss of your valuable inventory, ensuring that your artistic investments are shielded from unforeseen circumstances. Additionally, liability coverage is designed to protect your business from potential legal claims related to your products or operations. As a jewelry artisan, you understand the meticulous craftsmanship that goes into each piece, and jewelry business insurance is there to preserve the passion and dedication you've invested.

Moreover, in a world where artisans engage with customers both in-person and online, this insurance provides peace of mind by covering potential risks associated with sales, exhibitions, and shipping. Whether your creations are on display at an art fair, in a gallery, or being shipped to a satisfied customer, you can focus on your craft knowing that your business is protected.

Choosing the right jewelry business insurance is an investment in the longevity and prosperity of your artistic venture. It's a testament to the recognition of the unique challenges faced by jewelry artisans, ensuring that your passion for creating beautiful and meaningful pieces is safeguarded against the unpredictable nature of the art and business world.

[oc-aita]

AITA for becoming my ex-best friend’s nemesis after he ditched me to join a superhero team with my bullies?

Some context. I (16F) have been best friends with this guy Gale (16M) since…forever. Our moms were in the same pregnancy support group and we went to the same kindergarten and we’ve basically been inseparable our entire lives. We’ve always been there for each other when times were tough- my dad died in a freak accident at work when I was 5 and his family really helped me and my mom, and we offered similar support when his older brother died a few years later.

I don’t want to minimise Gale’s issues but he’s lived a much more comfortable life than me. His dad is the CEO of a construction company and they have a normal sized house in a nice area (difficult to get in our city). Meanwhile my mom works 3 minimum wage jobs and barely affords the rent in our run-down apartment in the most dangerous part of town. He’s super sociable and gets along with everyone, while I’ve been bullied since the day I stepped on the playground. We’re both equally smart but teachers see him as charming while I’m the disruptor. The only real “advantage” I have is athletically. Gale was never interested in doing extracurriculars, but the 2 neighbours on our floor teach martial arts and REALLY like my mom’s cooking so I’ve been getting free Jujustu and Capoeira lessons since Elementary school. But I never really made friends in those classes so it’s always just been me and him.

Anyway a couple days after Gale’s 16th birthday he started acting wierd. He was spending less time with me, hanging out with other people and dodging the issue anytime I asked him about it. He was still friendly during school but anytime I wanted to hang out he’d say he couldn’t. I wasn’t angry, just concerned, especially since he’d been getting closer with a select few classmates who’d been especially ruthless when bullying me and often picked on him too. Eventually he relented and told me that his dad had volunteered to be the coach for the “Lacrosse team” and signed him up for practice every day after school and he had no say in it. I said it was fine and he didn’t need to hide that from me but he said he felt bad bc he couldn’t hang out as much.

I spoke with my mom about it and she said I should ask about joining the lacrosse team too if I really wanted to keep spending time with him, so I did. And it turns out the Lacrosse team was a LIE. Well it did exist, but they were using it as a cover. Turns out Gale’s dad was our city’s superhero (his name is “Tempest” and he has weather powers) and he’s been acting as his sidekick and leading some kind of young justice-esque teen supersquad with my 3 bullies. Btw, I only learned this AFTER I showed up to Lacrosse practice where I was ridiculed by them and Gale cut off our friendship entirely. Initially I was going to forgive him bc he kept giving me guilty looks at school and I figured he probably ditched me for my own safety. But then he told the bullies ABOUT MY DEAD DAD, apparently in an effort to get them to sympathise with me and leave me alone. This obviously didn’t work and now the entire school knows about my home situation and I’ve been the butt of so many hurtful jokes.

Anyway the only reason I found out Gale’s secret was because I was one of the civilians caught in the crossfire between their squad and his dad’s nemesis, some supervillain named “The Underking.” This Underking guy saved me from falling debris at some point, and I followed him back to his headquarters out of morbid curiosity. Initially he was furious and tried to get rid of me but then I learned that not only was this guy BEST FRIENDS WITH MY DAD, HE WAS THERE WHEN HE DIED AND IT WASNT AN ACCIDENT. Apparently the factory they worked at was destroyed by a supervillain, and when he went after him he learned that the guy was being paid so the building owner could commit insurance fraud. All the villains currently attacking the city were getting similar payments, and the Underking was masquerading as a bad guy to try and get in good with them and uncover who was behind it.

I begged him to let me help find out who killed my dad, and while he didn’t want to at first, I told him that I knew the secret identities of everyone in the hero squad that just defeated him and what their weaknesses were. He gave me this suit that gives me invisibility powers and now I’m an “intern” at city council because it turned out this guy was THE MAYOR.

I started this whole out of spite but working for him has actually been really nice? He’s become like a surrogate father to me; he tells me stories about my dad, his lackeys help me with my homework, and he’s been paying my mom’s rent. He’s encouraged me to put more effort into my martial arts classes; I actually started making friends with the other people there and now my mom has more money I can afford to go out and do nice things with them.

Gale, his dad, and my bullies all know I’m the Underking’s new sidekick causing mayhem around the city. I tried to hide it but I got tag-teamed a couple fights ago and they ripped my mask off. The Underking lost that fight but I sure didn’t! Seeing the fear in my bullies eyes when they realised the girl they’d been throwing in dumpsters can roundhouse kick with near-professional precision was the highlight of my week ngl. They’ve FINALLY stopped harassing me at school because of it.

Part of me still feels bad though, Gale told me that he never wanted to work with my bullies and wanted me on the team instead but his dad said no. Whenever we fight in the field it feels super personal, and he always looks super betrayed. A couple times he’s even begged me not to fight. I just can’t help but feel like he decided that being a superhero was more important to him than being my friend. But when I put it that way I feel selfish. AITA?

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

Lately, I've been enjoying a little documentary called ROTTEN: BEHIND THE FOODFIGHT.

Put together by Ziggy Cashmere, who cobbled together the great book DRAWING FOR NOTHING, it's an hour-long and wild look at the making of an infamous animated travesty. A troubled production of epic proportions...

Strangely, this thing is like the anti-THIEF AND THE COBBLER. Their basic production storylines have a very similar turning point, which is all kinds of wild. They also took forever to come out in some form.

The stark difference is, of course, the sheer prowess of THIEF AND THE COBBLER director Richard Williams and the utter incompetence of FOODFIGHT! director Larry Kasanoff.

Richard Williams initially got onboard a doomed animated adaptation of Arabian Nights folklore in the late 1960s, the stories of a particular character named Nasruddin. When that all fell out in the early 1970s, Williams took the characters he came up with for that picture - such as the titular thief - and started his own Arabian Nights-inspired dream tale... And self-funded this passion project throughout the 1970s and into the mid 1980s, directing so many commercials and the occasional bigger project in-between. It was his impressive, comprehensive reel and his direction on WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT's animation that landed him a Warner Bros. gig, who were at the time trying to get more committed to making feature animation in the wake of Disney's newfound success and the rise of Don Bluth.

Williams, unfortunately, missed the deadline for completing THE THIEF AND THE COBBLER. Williams had a history of not completing films on time, such as his Oscar-winning A CHRISTMAS CAROL adaptation and the 1977 film RAGGEDY ANN AND ANDY: A MUSICAL ADVENTURE, and with THIEF, he was very deep into it. He also, unusually, didn't do any storyboards for the film. A method that he was said to have found "too controlling". When it came time to show a rough cut of the film, they had to force him to get storyboards done and fill in the 15 minutes of gaps. Another story details how he liked a particular scene, and had the crew extend it, and extend it again, regardless of runtime and pace. Williams himself likened his process to working away at a painting or a pot, like an old master craftsman. Laboriously making fine art, but as a film... which isn't the most conducive way of doing things when your animated film - with promotional deals and marketing in place - is expected to be completed within a deadline. It did, however, make for such incomprehensibly amazing visuals that continue to *floor* me to this day.

By contrast, Kasanoff didn't know anything about making animated features, and couldn't be bothered with storyboards. He thought you could just go about it as if it were a live-action film... If FOODFIGHT! was conceived this decade and was being "made" right now? Larry would absolutely have tried using AI to do it. That's more or less the attitude he had when he shifted the production to being a motion-capture film, after a few slow years of it being a CG film with Looney Tunes-esque slapstick, with squash-and-stretch movements.

Both films were made at studios founded/owned by their directors. Richard Williams Animation Ltd., and Threshold Animation... and both films were seized by insurance companies, companies in the movie industry that are meant to step in when a film misses its deadline.

In THIEF's case, it was... The Completion Bond Company. They took the film from Williams and most of his crew in May 1992 after a disastrous screening of the workprint, and with the looming release of Disney's very similar ALADDIN later that year. Handing it to TV animation veteran Fred Calvert, the company's mandate was to have the film finished quickly and cheaply... Ironically, it took Calvert til September 1993 to "finish" the film. After a year and a half of re-imagining most of it, cutting a lot of stuff, giving mute character Tack a voice, adding musical numbers, and animating a bunch of new stuff...

That version of THIEF was damaged goods, and few wanted to release it. It didn't help that ALADDIN had been out for a while at that point. It got out, as THE PRINCESS AND THE COBBLER, in Australia and South Africa. A Philippines release around this time kept the original title... Miramax, owned by Disney, acquired U.S. distribution rights at the end of 1994 and Harvey Scissorhands butchered it even further, and that was released theatrically as ARABIAN KNIGHT in summer 1995... And then on video as THE THIEF AND THE COBBLER...

It's quite something how PRINCESS AND THE COBBLER and ARABIAN KNIGHT flopped and sunk into obscurity, while the original Williams film - in its incomplete form - became beloved over time. I also heard somewhere that Williams, prior to his passing, made peace with the film being incomplete. The unfinished film had garnered a fitting subtitle: A MOMENT IN TIME...

FOODFIGHT! was wrenched out of Threshold's hands by The Fireman's Fund Insurance Company after several missed release dates sometime in early 2008, and it was handed to a venue that took what was - quite frankly - a very crappy skeleton of a film with the most unpolished mo-cap and visuals... and... I guess, did what they "could" with it, as cheaply as possible. It was finished in late 2008, got an MPAA rating sometime thereafter... And sat... The Fireman's Fund even tried to auction it in late 2011, but... Nothing. Until a very limited UK theatrical (!) release in summer 2012, in addition to releases in Russia and UAE. It was a direct-to-video title here in the U.S. in early 2013... Eventually, some bottom-of-the-barrel distributor picks it up, eh?

Much like FOODFIGHT!, THIEF also has a comprehensive documentary covering its lengthy production and what had happened to it, in the form of Kevin Schreck's PERSISTENCE OF VISION, an absolute must-watch.

Sometimes I think of what would've happened had both films been finished, and in FOODFIGHT!'s case, was at least competent-looking.

THE THIEF AND THE COBBLER - when it was still under Warner Bros. - was apparently aiming for theatrical release in late 1991. This would've put it up against Disney's BEAUTY AND THE BEAST, and also Amblimation's AN AMERICAN TAIL sequel FIEVEL GOES WEST. Maybe it would've vacated late 1991 and got out in early 1992, much in the same way FERNGULLY and ROCK-A-DOODLE did in the states. Any place away from a big Disney movie, at least...

How would it have done circa 1991/early 1992? That remains to be a million dollar question. THE THIEF AND THE COBBLER in its unfinished state is a work of art, a narratively outre picture, in addition to being a little more "adult" in its presentation. Small little things, like the maiden from Mombasa, some war violence, and a flagpole sticking right through a warrior's chest. Probably wouldn't have gotten a G rating, for sure. Its story quality is sometimes debated amongst animation fans, usually in such a boring binary manner, from my perspective. It's a film that defies the "conventions" of good animated feature storytelling that were somehow cemented in place by the early 1990s by the Disney Renaissance favorites, thus I feel it tends to have that "well, the story meanders and it wasn't very good" nonsense slapped at it... when it's a picture operating on a dream-like, lyrical plane that puts it more in line with early Disney works than BEAUTY AND THE BEAST and ALADDIN. It's not an inferior nor superior form of storytelling, it's just not what American audiences have been used to over the last 35 years.

I think it would've gotten praise for its lovely animation, but mixed reviews for its idiosyncratic storytelling... And audiences probably would've been bored out of their minds watching, say, long and hazy stretches of the thief getting smacked about by polo players or trying to get up the minaret. Warner would've probably mishandled the release anyway, as they had flop after flop during that period. NUTCRACKER PRINCE, ROVER DANGERFIELD, THUMBELINA, etc. A film that absolutely, without fail would've garnered a cult following once it hit video.

FOODFIGHT!, had it been given to someone who actually **knew** how to direct an animated feature, but was still based off of the same script by Larry Kasanoff, Josh Wexler, and co.... Let's just say that it's the version from the late 1990s when protagonist Dex was still a human detective, and it was more PG-13 like it supposedly was aiming to be early on... And released in like 2001/2002... That probably would've also had trouble, I think.

Big-time Western PG-13 animated movies had it hard throughout the '90s and into the early 2000s, films such as BEBE'S KIDS and COOL WORLD. They were a rare breed, at that. Still are, even. One of the only exceptions was, well, a movie based on a very popular animated TV series: BEAVIS AND BUTT-HEAD DO AMERICA. For a more original picture, no, it wasn't easy... And I'm not sure CGI would've helped this version of FOODFIGHT! much, either. It could've done okay in that regard, maybe quite a few notches below a JIMMY NEUTRON gross... It would have to depend on how the visuals looked, too. Then again, look at how HOODWINKED! did in early 2006... Reviews probably would've questioned how FOODFIGHT!'s world works and they likely would've found fault with equating a store-band takeover of a supermarket to freakin' Nazi Germany, so I'd imagine it wouldn't have gotten SHREK or MONSTERS, INC. reception. Another movie that would've probably came and went, and then went on to be a cult DVD rotation for many kids growing up in the 2000s.

THE THIEF AND THE COBBLER and FOODFIGHT! both remain fascinating for these particular reasons, even if the results are a country kilometer from one another...

[therobertfrasergang]

Robert Fraser in the Evening Standard, June 8 1967

Modern art: The currency between the financier and his son

This article appeared in the Evening Standard on June 8, 1967. It was part of a series on fathers and sons. Part 4 profiled the Fraser family, focusing on Lionel Fraser and Robert Fraser.

The entire article is transcribed below the cut.

A Name to Live Up To, by Tom Pocock

Modern art: The currency between the financier and his son

The rebel son being so essential a stock figure in family lore it would seem that Robert Fraser has all the qualifications of a particularly fine specimen. Seldom can the worlds of father and son have been in such stunning contrast and seldom can father and son have seemed, to outsiders, such opposites.

Robert Fraser is the son of the later Lionel Fraser.

At 29, Robert Fraser is founder and proprietor of the Robert Fraser Gallery in Mayfair, the most avant garde, far-out art gallery in London.

Currently, he is awaiting an exhibition by Mr. Andy Warhol, the American experimental artist, which, it can safely be forecast, will be unlike anything yet seen in an art gallery, or, possibly, anywhere else.

Mr. Fraser has suffered a lot of publicity recently having been fined £20 under the Vagrancy Act of 1838 for exhibiting “obscene” drawings and collages by the American artist Jim Dine, whose work is represented at the Tate.

Mr. Fraser was duly credited in Time magazine’s memorable discovery of swinging London. Mr. Fraser’s scene is one to make British squares close their ranks. His father, who died two years ago, was a man for whom the inescapable adjective was “distinguished.” Tycoon was too vulgar a word for Lionel Fraser. A financier, who made money-making seem like high diplomacy, he ranked high among the City’s royalty.

A self-made man (his father was butler to Gordon Selfridge, the department store emperor) Lionel Fraser carried himself as if born to wealth and position.

His influence in banking, investment trusts, insurance and industry came primarily through Helbert Wagg, the merchant bankers, Thomas Tilling, the industrial holding company and Babcock and Wilcox, the engineers, but his photograph—a dignified face, white hair and an immaculate bow tie—often appeared on City pages in connection with anything from publishing to cars, take-overs to mergers.

Tragedy

The Fraser family was, and is, conventional in a prosperous and intelligent way. Living In Belgravia and, like a surprising number of their like, Christian Scientists, the Frasers lived a contented life until touched by tragedy.

Ten years ago the only daughter, Janet, a beautiful, vivid girl, who, at the age of 21, had been secretary to Sir William Haley, then editor of The Times, was killed with her fiancé in a road accident. Then at 69, Lionel Fraser died.

Robert Fraser's mother and his brother, a stockbroker, continue to lead the lives to which they were accustomed. But not Robert Fraser.

Robert Fraser's quick, delicate person is so different from his father’s stately presence; his accent, Anglo-American; his conversation, stream-of-consciousness.

“Did I rebel? I never thought of that. I just do what I like doing. That's what everyone tries to do. I try to avoid doing things that I don’t like. Did my father influence me? I don't think that parents do have influences—the best parents don’t have influences. I might be influenced by ideas but not by parents. I never thought heredity plays a great part except that you react against it. It’s environment that matters.”

Robert Fraser was first sent to a Christian Science school but “could not get attuned to it. I feel religious but not interested in religion.”

Then to Eton, “which is better than anywhere else because it is eccentric. But English boarding schools are insane. Education is teaching but you are not taught. In 15 years learning Latin I never heard anyone stop and say: ‘This is a beautiful poem.’ I'm glad I was educated, but it would have been nice to have been taught."

But, by what Robert Fraser would put down as environment, his father did influence him. Lionel Fraser was a patron of modern art and, as a trustee of the Tate Gallery did, in his son’s view “much to improve that stale atmosphere. Many American cities have better collections and Americans who hear about the Tate go there and ask: ‘What’s it all about?’

The dust

“My father wanted the Tate to shake off the dust and tried to align it with the present. But this is not so much an indictment of the Tate as of England. In England it takes time to change things.”

After Eton, Robert Fraser went to New York and joined the art scene. Five years ago, he returned to London and, with his father's encouragement, opened the gallery in Duke Street. Then, says Robert Fraser: “London was very boring. Suddenly, around 1964, it was all happening. An eruption, you know. A social revolution.

“What the Beatles call The Beautiful People. These people—these young artists, writers and musicians—these people are the privileged class now. They used to have no voice. Now they are blowing off the dust.

“All this youth paraphernalia came from here. These people are original. These ideas are mainly coming from England. New York is sterile, uncreative, l mean, you go to the States— they have a fantastic industry for everything: machine-guns, cosmetics, Lichtenstein paintings. It’s an industrial thing. The English give them the idea and they make a thing of it.”

Robert Fraser thinks that his father would have understood and enjoyed 1967 scene. “He was a Victorian but the best of the Victorians were like really important business people today: they had imagination. My father's mixed with some very conventional people but he never belonged to them. He would never do things because they had been done before. The Victorians were like that before the calcification began. My father was one of the few people in this country who liked new things. Most people distrust new things.”

Balance

The obvious differences between father and son seemed less important. And as Robert Fraser talked he sounded less like an arbiter of the arts but more like an adventurous tycoon. “Art dealing the way l do it needs a fine balance of judgement. Most dealers buy something because they know they can sell it at a profit. I back my own taste. I show what I like.”

Robert Fraser refuses to have what he likes labelled “because people love to be able to pigeonhole things. I like to keep people on edge. Anything new is uncomfortable. I like people coming into the gallery to feel uneasy. A picture that makes you happy now may have made people acutely uncomfortable when it was first painted.'” Currently he is thinking of forms of art-dealing outside the gallery, something that he cannot yet define but obviously something of which Mr. Warhol would approve.

“As art widens its scope,” he says, “so must galleries.” The next move is the Warhol exhibition. After that, perhaps films. The Fraser imaginatlon roams farther and farther out.

The son of the discreet financier then reveals another of his father’s traits. “Some people who meet me say that they didn't know there was a person called Robert Fraser. But they still came to the Robert Fraser Gallery because they knew they'd find a certain kind of thing. I liked that.”

I suspect Lionel Fraser would have liked that, too. It is called reputation.

[unicyclehippo]

This is anon from earlier. I didn't mention Laudna's role because you already had, and I interpreted Imogen as the only one inviting my unhinged input. I simply believed your big beautiful brain had tomes already covering the subject so I stepped back. In fact, Laudna is my #1 favorite CR charcter of all time to the point that talking about her makes me shy?? so even focusing on Imogen that much was probably a good exercise for me. I'm looking at a Dark Crystal art book on my shelf as we speak. The puppeteer concept owns my ass.

yeah that makes sense 👍 talk abt her more! shyness is not being sure if what u say is good or beautiful or funny enough or attention seeking whatever i tell u fuck it up!!!!! yell scream holler!!! this is not just abt laudna it’s midnight for me n im fucking pissed talk loud talk shit make weird art make crude jokes im sick of POLITE im sick of SOFT im sick of every weird thing being apologised for or hidden away loud n proud baby make weird art make weird characters try smth new be messy be in the moment try your best do it loud

anyway i hope i didn’t sound too rude before i was being a little bitch abt ppl not giving laudna enough attention but it wasn’t abt u specifically. here’s a snippet i wrote when i should have been working:

The show is going to be a fucking disaster.

Imogen hasn’t said those exact words out loud yet because if the actors hear her they’ll go into hysterics; she’s considering it still, despite that, because at the moment it feels like she either tells them they’re fucking stupid or she personally strangles someone. No one has learned their fucking lines, or their blocking—despite Orym diligently taping it out for them; FCG keeps trying to find a way to get the flamethrower into the show; the leading man and his understudy got into a fistfight—and Imogen still can’t figure out what the fight was about (except that Fearne was involved, of course), if Fearne encouraged it, and whether she needs to fire these guys or just give them a stern talking to—and as if all that weren’t enough, the set is falling to pieces. That wasn’t the troupe’s fault. Or Imogen’s. The moving company fucked it up on the move from storage when the theatre was getting repaired and after a very, very, very long back and forth, the theatre is going to get some kind reimbursement from the insurance but she doubts very much that the cash will make it to them in time for everything to be fixed by opening night. Basically, they’re fucked.

‘Why don’t we take five?’ Orym suggests, very quietly over his walkie. ‘I can hear you grinding your teeth from here,’ he jokes.

Imogen hopes it’s a joke. She tries to look for him but gives it up as impossible—most likely, he’s backstage or at Props and she can’t see him from her place in the third row. She relaxes her jaw. Rubs her temples for a second before fumbling for her walkie talkie.

‘Might as well. We could take twenty and it wouldn’t fix shit.’ Movement on the stage. Imogen looks over—and locks eyes with big, bright, hopeful eyes. She jams her finger onto the talk button of her walkie. ‘If FCG comes a step closer to me, I’ll kill ���em.’

‘Roger that. I’ll send Ash to distract.’

Imogen drops heavily into the back of her seat. Scowls as she takes in the stage. She doesn’t notice actors throwing themselves bodily out of her line of sight.

Truth is, it’s going to be fine. There’s two weeks until dress rehearsal, and three until opening night, and—as it has with every show Imogen’s directed—it will come together. The actors will figure it out, maybe fumble a line or two. FCG can be handled, flamethrower drastically underpowered (or denied entirely, as is Imogen’s preference). Fearne…is Fearne. Still more talent than trouble, barely—which was really saying something, since she was maybe the most talented actor Imogen had ever met.

It’s the set that’s the real problem, the real reason Imogen hasn’t been able to sleep at night. Whenever she looks at it, her heart feels like it’s going to crack open. And every bright idea and directing cue she adds to make up for it is just a band-aid barely holding it together. It’s ridiculous to be so upset about it but…

Every year. Every year, the Bertrand Bell’s House of Entertainment, Leisure, and Luxury (most just call it the Bell Theatre) puts on Matilda & Delilah. It’s an old play and a crowd favourite for a reason—performers come and go, costumes change, sometimes a bold director changes the setting to something more modern, but it’s the set that keeps people coming back to see it, year after year. The tree. It’s the heart of the entire play. For Imogen, it’s the heart of the entire theatre. There wouldn’t be a Bell Theatre without it; there wouldn’t be an Imogen without it.

The tree is old and gnarled. One big piece that looms in the back of the stage—when the lights fall on it, just right, it is impossibly huge in the tiny little theatre. The shadow it casts stretches across the back curtain, branches twisting and grasping like crooked fingers, and every year Imogen lives for that moment when the lights shut off—all but the one behind the tree, and those same branches crawl out over the crowd. Menacing them. Trapping them. It’s dark and, when it’s done right, genuinely frightening.

But it’s broken. Half the branches snapped off, and the mechanism to wheel it up and down the stage busted. The cage doors won’t open either, and the colour has bleached in odd places. Imogen half-suspects the moving company hadn’t stored it at all. This wasn’t her tree at all, just some shoddy replica.

[mychemicalroadworkahead]

Info idfk

Hi hello, I’m Frank and your best bet is to not refer to me but in the case that you must he/they will work just fine

More extensive list of pronouns, names, and all that shtuff can be found here

Linktree is here

HRT GoFundMe is here (why do insurance companies fucking suck????????)

I am a minor, don’t be weird

Free Palestine

Life on the Murder Scene triggers list

If you’re not into gore, gays, or pop punk bands, you should probably see yourself out

Please send asks, I need more enrichment in my enclosure

Feel free to send me things to draw, I run out of ideas so fast :)

Tags for original posts:

Art: frank does art

Text post: frank writes words

Tangents/rants: frank screams words

Polls: frank asks questions

Comic shenanigans: Rachmaninov way

Current Obsession (changes frequently): 9-1-1: Lone Star (show), TK from Lone Star, Judd from Lone Star, Carlos from Lone Star, 9-1-1 (show), Buck from 9-1-1, House (show), YAYA (song), Beyoncé, boba (food)

Most recent original post: https://www.tumblr.com/mychemicalroadworkahead/768274254756265984/hot-chocolate-made-with-coffee-you-agree

Most recent art: https://www.tumblr.com/mychemicalroadworkahead/767720755743129600/this-took-5-fucking-hours-anyway-time-to-go-grab

Most recent edit: https://www.tumblr.com/mychemicalroadworkahead/760632919447470080/126-x-static-jukebox-the-ghost

Current favorite post on this website: https://www.tumblr.com/cordspaghetti/756482793517842432/i-have-once-again-been-compelled-to-draw

Ao3 story I’m working on is here

[kevin--of-desert-bluffs]

WTNV quick rundown - 95 - Zookeeper

Check my tags or this link for the other episodes etc that I've done!

Featuring the voice of Felicia Day as Joanna Rey.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a cursed talisman must be in want of a hex reversal. Welcome to Night Vale.

Cecil is visited by head zookeeper Joanna Rey who has brought in several animals for Cecil to see.

Joanna has brought in a chicken, which apparently somewhat resembles a raccoon. Cecil always assumed chickens were mythical because he'd never seen one. They have bright orange and yellow wings, dozens of spiny legs, antennae and are considered exotic animals (at least by Cecil).

She also brings brown tarantulas, which aren't as exciting to Cecil due to being 'common' but she says she has brought them because they are horribly undereducated as a species. The zoo has taught these ones to be sentient and to read and they are named Samantha, Jordy, Nash, Carmelo, Patrice, Garfield and Helen. Despite being able to read they are not able to communicate what they have learned.

Joanna also brings in piglets. Cecil names one Wobbles and another The Professor. There is also a steer (which has wings).

Joanna than transforms into a panther and consumes every animals she brought in except the tarantulas (who go and get jobs in human resources). She states that she is a shapeshifter and always takes the form of a big cat to eat because people are disturbed when she eats her meals in the form of a human.

Joanna has apparently also dated a dragon called Donna who had at least one gold and one green head and dumped her only after trying to ghost her for a good while.

Weather: "Coffee" by Sylvan Esso

Many citizens are complaining about all the five-headed dragons. Marjory Vallejo, manager of the Dollar Cinema says they take up a dozen seats each and obscure the view for others. Teddy Williams has cancelled league night because of the scratches in the lanes. Bob Sturm, vice president of the NV Auto Insurance Company says there has been an uptake in dragon related incidents and they will no longer be covering anyone who owns a car. Cecil suggests that everyone try their best to be friendly which involves pointing at the dragons and shouting "interloper!" and following them home asking invasive questions.

Old Woman Josie apparently has childern. One of which, her daughter Alondra, has returned to NV from ??? to take care of Josie due to Josie's aforementioned broken hip. Josie doesn't speak about her children very much likely because she is bitter they left her to live outside of the desert. She insists that she's fine because she lives with the angels but Alondra is keen to stay and take care of her mother. Cecil and Intern Kareem have a small disagreement about Cecil refusing to acknowledge the existence of angels and Cecil not believing how stubborn Kareem is about angels yet he wouldn't believe Cecil about Huntokar.

Josie also mentions that the StrexCorp Foundation supports not only the new old Opera House but her, several local arts groups, a library destruction fund and the charity 'Cars for Kids'.

According to Cecil, microphones are smarter than dolphins.

Many if not all roads are completely transparent today which is causing a lot of chaos.

Cecil states that his usual work outfit is a cummberbund and capri pants which apparently helps people understand that he is a journalist. However, he's dressed up a bit currently because it's Plastic Pancho Wednesday.

Stay tuned next, Night Vale, for the sound of scrubbing, followed by the sound of gagging, followed by the sound of liquid dribbling into a metal pan. And as always, good night, Night Vale. Good night.

Proverb: Wanna feel old? People born in 2014 have already graduated college, don't know what a trombone is, & are all named after gourds.