#finances never stop aching ; ;
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kagedbird · 4 months ago
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OKAY. Got a bit to yap about.
This month is looking rough all ready for funds. Two weeks in and I haven't even gotten a third of what I need for rent. I'm at 240$ out of 1,130$. That's REALLY bad. Work has been too light for peak season.
Just as well, I FINALLY found someone who's not a dick bag and offering a car for a decent sum of money and is getting it serviced to fix its problems and is willing to let me know how that servicing comes out to be.
They need to fix a motor in the window (driver side I think) and were very kind when chatting with me. That's about 3,350$. I have nothing saved for that and only have until mid November to get someone to drive me out there to them so I can pick up the car.
IN SHORT, I DESPERATELY NEED CASH. I know I am always begging for cash, and I am so sorry for that, I get it if you're tired of me begging, but I am too. Having this car would mean I could stop paying so much for Uber / Lyfts, food delivery, could work longer hours (should my body actually hold), and if worse comes to worse, live in it. I could even BECOME an Uber / Lyft driver, should I have the need to.
Now, just as a reminder, the 3,350$ is ONLY for purchasing the car. That's not including DMV visits, taxes, gas, and anything else I might need on top of that— as well as getting an actual ID / license for this state since I wasn't able to do that before elections. If we could shoot for 4,500$ that could probably cover a lot.
The car is a Jeep Liberty 2003, Sport Utility 4D.
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Very good size with a large enough trunk (hopefully) for all my shit if worse comes to worse.
I'm very scared and don't like making fundraiser posts like this, but I'm going to be working on actually finishing the comms I've had sitting for a hot minute so I can reopen them and get some money that way too.
If you'd like to wait for that in order to get something for your money, perfectly fine! Otherwise, I have two options:
Car dono link:
Airbnb dono link:
You can also use my KOFI here if Paypal isn't to your taste!
And if you can't, reblogging to get the word out is just as well. Thank you, and I hope your financial situations are far kinder than mine!
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yandere-romanticaa · 8 months ago
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Marriage was often used as a tool of convenience - be it to upgrade one's own social status, get some much needed silver and gold, or to just get one leg up over your enemies, it really did not matter in the end.
Like it or not, you were tied to that person till death did you part.
That was a chant that has been sung to you ever since you came out of your weeping mother's womb. As the daughter of the household, it was natural for you to wed one day. However, the family was one of average standing, it had no special titles tacked onto it nor did it have any grotesque reputation which could sully it to the darkness and back. In its own way, it was oddly blissful, being invisible like that. No one expected you to act like a stuck up lady who would be locked away deep in a tower and you were also safe from becoming a measley wench who would be forced to spend the rest of her miserable days stuck rolling around in the mud, selling her body to all sorts of horrific strangers just in order to eat for a day.
You had the privilege of being born into a happy life. Perhaps a slightly dull one sometimes but regardless, a good one at that. You were content with everything which was given to you, perhaps even happy.
However, all things come to an end, and your end came in the form of a man riding on horseback.
He was strong, capable, handsome... But you kept that thought to yourself as you helped the wounded stranger get back on his feet, his midnight black steed happily trotting away somewhere as it accidentally shook the rider off its back once it locked eyes on you, a stranger in the woods.
"And who might you be?" asked the dark haired man, his curly hair framing his pale face so wonderfully that it took the breath from your lungs away.
You held onto him tightly and pressed him close to your body, the odor of blood and sweat covering him from top to bottom but you couldn't be bothered to care. He wore simple clothing which made you think that he was in a similar position like yourself in terms of finance, which gave you a slight glimmer of hope.
It was embarrassing how much you were swooning over the stranger.
Taking him back to your hut took longer than expected but all was well in the end. The handsome stranger had a name, Robb he said it was, and you couldn't hide the adoration in your voice whenever he would speak to you. The night flew by like a summer breeze - too fast and too sweet. Come first daylight he had to leave, which you understood.
That didn't stop you from feeling a little blue.
He mounted his horse like a knight in shining armor, its mane tussling proudly in the bitter north wind as Robb looked down at you, his warm blue eyes desperate to tell you many stories and secrets, but time was cruel and scarce.
He would come back to you, he promised.
And you gave him a smile sweeter than any juicy fruit, telling him that you would gladly wait for him.
He rode away all the while looking back at you, sending you a heart stopping smile which could make anyone weak in the knees. The horse left large hoofprints in the snow and you focused your attention on that, rather than the bitter stabs of pain in your heart.
There would never be a day when you'd see Robb ever again.
You were due to leave for the South in a few weeks time, in order to finally be wed off. The fantasy of Robb was saccharine and enchanting, many hours of sleep were lost due to him. Even if you barely knew him, the matters of the heart were reckless and stupid.
The heart wants what it wants and your heart ached for Robb.
All the while, you hadn't a clue of him and his plans. The men in Winterfell grew tired of his constant ramblings of this lovely woman he met, this sweet little thing which made his heart sing like no one else. He would walk in the corridors with a pep in his step as he thought of all the ways he could take you back to his home and give you the life you deserved.
His candied tirade quickly came to an abrupt halt once his mother had informed him of the grave news, that you had been promised to another man.
Robb was furious.
Who was this man?! Who did he think he is?! Ever the meticulous man, he got to work immediately. In less than a few days he had managed to gather all the information he could on this mystery fiance of yours, all the papers sprawled across his massive table. The candles in his chambers glimmered gently, the shimmering light a stark contrast to the raging flames in his heart.
If he could have his way, he'd be out for blood. Robb was too much of a jealous man for his own good but he needed to think, he needed to prepare if he wanted to do this right.
In less than a day, he had everything set up. If the man wasn't willing to take the gold he was offering him, he was not above using any scare tactics. His anger ended up getting the better of him though, so a bizarre combination of both was used.
The way in which your fiance left you made your heart sink. How were you going to break the news to your parents? Whatever could you have done so wrong to earn the ire of this lord whom you haven't even met yet...
You weep in your room, staining the mattress with your salty tears, completely oblivious to the small cavalry with House Stark banners raging on your front door.
Robb Stark had come for his bride. And she had no idea what sort of future awaited her...
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ratherchili · 1 month ago
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đ–č­ cw: angst, briefly explicit, cheating implied, mdni
Kento Nanami is a good husband. You know, because he was good to you once, years ago. The memories come flooding back when you first lay eyes on him again in Tokyo. It seems like fate when he takes a job in the office you work in. Did he remember? Was it on purpose?
The ring on his finger answers your question. Of course he's married. What did you expect after all this time? It doesn't stop the flood of memories, though. He walks by your desk, and the scent of his cologne transports you back to when he wrapped you in his arms after a mission. His strong body closed around yours like a vice, like he could never let you go.
Your eyes meet from across the room and the image of him buried between your legs, looking up at you through blonde lashes, drinking in every little sound and expression you make for him. You shiver. Does he remember? Does he remember lying next to you, pretending to ignore you for his book while you whined and pawed at him? You remember. You remember the way he smiled and pulled you on top of him, the hardness of him pressed into your belly.
If he remembers, he doesn't show it. Aside from pressing your small hand into his large one when he meets you again, your interactions are minimal. Aside from saying that he's glad to see you well, your conversations are professional. A fresh ache settles into your heart. You never wanted things to end the way they did. After one too many sleepless nights wondering if he'd make it home at all, you'd hoped he'd follow you when you took the finance job in Tokyo. It hurt when he didn't, but not as much as losing him forever might have.
You try to be happy for him when his pretty little wife brings his forgotten lunch to the office. The way he smiles at her shouldn't make your guts churn with jealousy the way it does, but you're only human. She stops by more and more often. Everybody whispers about how she eyes up the dark-haired guy from security.
Still, the first time you see Nanami without his ring, you think it must be a fluke. Maybe he was running late, left it on the sink at home. But his finger is bare the next day, and the one after that. His chin is stubbled and his eyes are drawn and tired. "Are you okay?" You ask, resting a comforting hand on his shoulder. He says he's fine and thanks you. "I'm here if you need me," you offer, and he turns to look at you. When your eyes meet, you say. "I miss you." You don't mean to say it. It just slips out.
"I-" he begins. He shakes his head. Sighs. Looks away. "I can't."
Kento Nanami is a good husband. Just not yours. He turns you down because he's decent. But maybe not because it's what he truly wants.
The next day, the ring is back on his finger. Soon, the pretty little wife is stopping by, too often, with coffee or lunch. He even brings her to the annual company party. She looks devastating in red. Red like the wine you realize you're probably having too much of.
She doesn't even attempt to be discreet when she slips out of a side door with that dark-haired guy from security. You see it. Everyone does, even Nanami, who is frowning over the tops of the heads of the crowd on the dance floor. You are moving toward him, hand reaching out for him when he locks eyes with you. Then you are pulled against his chest again, and his nose is in your hair, and he's saying, "I missed you, too." The music is slow, the world narrowed to the lack of space between you. Time seems to stop.
It is nice, while it lasts, but then he says her name and he's gone. You're alone with the pulse of the music and the whisper of the crowd like a collection of cruel ghosts.
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spiritualitygeek · 1 month ago
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PAC: Their Sexual Fantasies About You (Fs channeled reading)
Disclaimer: This content is intended for adults aged 18 and over. Minors are strictly advised not to engage. This reading is for entertainment purposes only and should not be used as the basis for any major life decisions, particularly regarding health, finances, or legal matters. Viewer discretion is strongly advised.
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1->2
3->4
5->6
Pile 1
Your future spouse is deeply sensual, the kind of lover who worships through touch. Their love language is physical, and they crave intimacy in the slowest, most tantalizing ways—drawing out every sensation, every breath, until you’re trembling under them.
They have a vivid imagination, and one of their favorite fantasies involves you, them, and a hot, steamy shower. They picture dim lighting, scented candles flickering, the air thick with heat as water cascades down your bodies. They imagine pressing you against the cold tile, the contrast against your warm, flushed skin sending a shiver through you. Their hands would be everywhere, lathering soap over your curves, massaging, exploring—taking their time to savor the feeling of your body beneath their touch.
They want to watch the way the water clings to your skin, how droplets race down your neck, your shoulders, your back. They fantasize about kneeling before you, kissing and biting their way up your thighs, their tongue tracing the path of the water. Or maybe they imagine pulling you into the bathtub instead, submerging you both in warmth, your bodies tangled together, slick with heat and desire.
But it doesn’t end there. No, in their mind, it always leads to something deeper, something raw. They picture you bent over beneath the rushing water, your back arched as they grip your hips, taking you in slow, deep thrusts that drive you insane. The sound of water splashing, heavy breaths mingling with the steam, the way your fingers claw at the fogged-up glass—every detail is burned into their thoughts.
For them, it’s not just about sex. It’s about immersion, about touch, about feeling every inch of you and making sure you feel every inch of them. They want to consume you, to make you melt under their hands, to hear your breath hitch as they claim you again and again—until the water runs cold and you’re both too exhausted to move.
Pile 2
Your future spouse sees sex as something deeply spiritual—an act of pure, soul-deep connection. They don’t just crave physical intimacy; they long to merge with you in a way that transcends the body, where every touch, every breath, every movement pulls you both into something sacred, something beyond the limits of flesh. They’ve already had you in every way imaginable—in their mind, in their fantasies, in the realm where energy speaks louder than words. If you've ever woken up from a heated dream, your body aching for someone whose face you can't quite remember, that was them, reaching for you across the unseen.
They're shy, reserved in the real world, not the type to sleep around or waste themselves on meaningless encounters. Sex, to them, isn't just pleasure—it's devotion, it's surrender, it's a universe unfolding between two souls meant for each other. Maybe they’ve been with others before, maybe they tried, but it never touched them the way it was supposed to. It was empty, disappointing, just flesh meeting flesh with nothing deeper beneath it. That’s why they stopped, why they decided to wait, to keep themselves for something real. For you.
But don’t mistake their restraint for innocence. They’re intensely sexual, their desire coiled tight, waiting to be unraveled by you. They might not have let themselves fully indulge before, but when they do—when it’s with you—they won’t hold back. They'll give you everything, let you break them apart and put them back together, let you push them to limits they didn’t know existed. There will be no shame, no hesitation—just raw, soul-consuming passion.
Maybe this is a twin flame connection, something written in the stars long before you even met in this life. They already feel you in their energy, in their dreams, in the silent moments where desire turns into longing. And when you finally come together in the flesh, it won’t just be sex—it’ll be a fucking revelation.
Pile 3
Your future spouse has a filthy mind—there’s no other way to put it. They’re into role-play, but not the tame kind. No, they love pushing boundaries, testing limits, watching the way your face shifts between shock and curiosity when they whisper their dirtiest thoughts in your ear. They’re the type to drop a fantasy so unfiltered, so downright filthy, that you'd pause mid-movement just to process if you heard them right. And they’ll revel in that moment, in the way your breath hitches, in the way your body betrays your innocence, betrays how much you want to hear more.
They've been a player for most of their life—cocky, experienced, and damn good at what they do. Not just because they’ve had practice, but because they know how to read a woman’s body like a language only they can translate. And with you? You’re their masterpiece. They love that you’re soft, untouched in ways that matter. It makes it all the more thrilling to corrupt you, to drag you into the depths of their desire and show you just how much you can take. Maybe they never thought of themselves as having a corruption kink before, but with you? With the way you shiver under their touch, the way you hesitate yet secretly crave everything they offer—they can’t get enough.
And they have one particular fantasy that won’t leave their mind: recording you. Not just for the act itself, but for the aftermath. For the teasing. For the way you’d turn red when they play it back, when they make you watch yourself unravel, your voice desperate, your body wrecked from the way they take you—hard, fast, relentless. You, who looks so innocent, so untouched, but when they have you? When they ruin you? You beg for more, again and again. And nothing turns them on more than knowing they’re the only one who gets to see you like that.
Pile 4
Your future spouse has a deep-seated desire for validation, stemming from unresolved Mommy/Daddy issues that they want to explore in the most intimate ways. They are drawn to the idea of submission, of kneeling at your feet—not out of weakness, but out of a need to worship and adore you. In their fantasies, they’re not just a lover—they’re completely surrendered to you, craving every bit of your power and control.
They get off on being claimed, on feeling as though you own them, body and soul. This goes beyond mere submission—it’s about giving you total dominion over them. They want you to take charge, to dominate them in ways that leave them breathless and wanting more. The thought of you being possessive, even a little toxic, thrills them—it stirs something deep inside them, something raw and primal. They want to feel like they are your property, your plaything, and they’ll do anything to make you feel in control.
Their kink for degradation comes alive when you punish them for their disobedience. They’ll test your limits, push your buttons, and look for ways to provoke you—just to see how far you’ll go. They want to see you angry, demanding, asserting your authority over them. And when you punish them, when you make them kneel and beg for your forgiveness, that’s when they truly feel seen, truly feel alive. It’s a heady mix of pain and pleasure, where each punishment brings them closer to the ecstasy of submission.
And then there’s the element of possession. They love the feeling of being owned, of having you claim them in ways that leave no doubt about who’s in charge. They don’t just want to be your lover—they want to belong to you completely, to feel your mark on them, to know that no one else will ever have them the way you do. The idea of you stepping on them, of taking them to their limits and beyond, excites them in ways they can’t even fully explain. They want to be taken, molded, shaped by you into whatever you desire, and they’ll gladly fall to their knees—physically, emotionally, spiritually—to prove their devotion.
Pile 5
Your future spouse has a taste for the unconventional, likely stemming from their exposure to erotic content that has shaped their sexual fantasies and desires. They don't just want to experience sex—they want to explore it in all its forms, including the thrill of multiple partners. This might involve both men and women, a dynamic where you’re not just with them, but also with others. It excites them to think about having you with someone else, to share you, to see you pleasure and be pleasured by someone else, while they do the same with another partner.
They fantasize about a foursome, an experience where the two of you are deeply immersed in a shared sexual encounter with others—whether it's watching you with someone else while they're engaged with someone else, or the two of you getting intertwined with others in a mix of bodies, moans, and pleasure. For them, it’s about pushing boundaries, about the heat of watching and being watched. They want to see you with others, to witness the way you move, the way you moan and respond to someone else’s touch, all while they’re lost in someone else’s body. It's a heady, erotic experience—orgasms building in waves as you all share the same space, bodies colliding in sync.
But here's the key—they are not about pushing you into anything you’re uncomfortable with. They’re fully aware of boundaries and are respectful of your desires. If you're into it, they'll embrace that side of themselves and be ecstatic to share that kind of sexual experience with you. If you're not into it, they won’t pressure you—they understand that everyone has different needs and desires, and they won't cross a line you’re not willing to go past. Ultimately, their fantasy revolves around the idea of sexual freedom and exploration, but always with mutual consent and respect.
Pile 6
Your future spouse is the ultimate exhibitionist, someone who thrives on the thrill of being watched, especially when it involves showing you off. They love the idea of making you theirs in the most public, daring, and provocative ways. It's not just about getting off—they want to see how you respond when the stakes are high, when there’s a risk of being caught, of others seeing your intimate connection. They’re addicted to the power dynamic that comes with being bold and brazen in public spaces, and they can’t wait to put that into practice with you.
One of their wildest fantasies is fucking you naked against the glass windows of your master bedroom, letting the world outside see how much they desire you, how passionately they can claim you. They fantasize about bending you over the balcony, the cool night air brushing against your heated skin, while they pound into you from behind. It’s not just sex—it’s a display, a way to show off just how sexy and dominant your connection is, how they can make you come undone in ways no one else could ever imagine.
They aren’t just limited to the privacy of your home. This extends to public places, like a secluded spot at the beach, where they can take you from behind, the waves crashing against the shore, your bodies moving together under the cover of the rocks, but still within reach of anyone who might happen to pass by. They love the danger, the excitement of possibly being caught, of teasing the world with the idea of what’s happening just out of sight.
They're the type to sneak off to the restroom during a packed party or club, pulling you into a stall for a quickie, not caring in the slightest that someone could walk in on you. The thought of being interrupted, of someone hearing the sounds of your bodies together, makes them harder, faster, hungrier. They crave the audacity of it all, of fucking you in a dark movie theater, with people sitting just a few feet away, completely unaware of the wild, dirty act unfolding between the two of you.
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It was my first time channeling sexual messages. I hope I did it justice and it resonated.
For more pac content or free personal readings, follow me and stay updated.
- Love, Snow <3
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blueicequeen19 · 2 years ago
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Control
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Warnings: public cock warming, public unprotected sex, degrading, praise, Frat Boy Rafe đŸ”„
I didn’t object to Rafe pulling me onto his lap, trapping me between him and the table. I didn’t object when his hand started to trace circles along my inner thigh under my plaid skirt as he continued to read his book with his free hand. I didn’t even object when he began to palm my aching bare pussy. He’d made me take my panties off before we came and tuck them in his pocket. You didn’t complain when you were dating Rafe Cameron. He did what he wanted, when he wanted. And if he wanted to fuck you in the silent library, surrounded by his college peers then you let him.
I tried to be a good girl and not shift too much on his lap but it was hard with the way his skilled fingers kept stroking my clit until my pussy and thighs were absolutely soaked.
“Rafe.” I whispered, my head against his shoulder.
“Don’t move.” Rafe instructed in a whisper, never looking up from his book. I glanced around but no one was looking up or noticed. Everyone had their nose in a book, deep in concentration. The only way they could see what was happening was if they looked under the table. But I still had to remain quiet.
I took a deep breath, willing myself to calm down even as he reached lower and buried two fingers inside me. I clamped my mouth shut, turning my head and attempting to plead with him with my eyes but he didn’t even look up from his book. A minute passed and his fingers didn’t move. I was starting to become delirious with need. I was about to start begging in front of all these people when his thumb pressed against my clit. My body jerked against the table but no one looked up, my heart beating erratically in my chest.
“I told you not to move.” Rafe finally spoke again in my ear, his voice low in warning.
“Rafe, please, let’s go somewhere.” I hissed back, my hands gripping the table to keep myself from grinding against his fingers.
“No, I have to study.” Rafe said, turning back to his book. I was going to die. I was going to cum in front of his peers and die of humiliation and maybe even a heart attack. I couldn’t catch my breath.
“Reach behind you and undo my pants.” Rafe murmurs softly in my ear. Oh god.
My hands shake as I do as instructed, his cock springing free the moment his button releases. He wasn’t wearing boxers. I try to bring my hands back around but Rafe curls his fingers inside me, making me gasp and jerk against him. Still, no one looks up or pays us any mind.
“Stand up and take a drink of your water then sit back down on my cock.” Rafe instructs, his low voice like a caress down my spine. He removes his fingers from inside me as I plant my feet on the floor and push myself up to reach for my water bottle. I take a small sip as I feel him guide his cock between my legs and to my soaked entrance.
“Rafe?” I startle, looking to one of his friends across the table who’s trying to get his attention. I’m afraid to move but Rafe’s fingers nudge my thigh, telling me to sit down.
“Yea?” Rafe asks, like I’m not about to sit down on his cock in front of all his peers. Rafe sits his book down to grab my thigh under the table and forces me to sit. The hardest thing I’d ever encountered was resisting the urge to let my eyes roll into the back of my head as he filled me. His cock was so thick and hard that I couldn’t think.
I could barely lean forward enough to grab my book but it only made him reach a different angle and I stopped abruptly, my inner walls spasming and my bottom lip quivers. The pleasure was so intense I felt like I was going to cry.
“Did you get the finance worksheet done?” Rafe’s friend asks. Rafe’s arm wraps around my waist, pulling me firmly against his chest as he picks up his book again. I raise my own book to hide my face. They engage in conversation about homework in low voices so not to draw negative attention from the librarian all while I’m on the verge of unraveling. I could feel his cock pulsing inside me. Just as ravenous as I was.
Finally, Rafe relaxes into his seat and widens his legs, only driving his cock deeper. I let the book rest against my forehead to keep from moaning. I could feel sweat running down my back and on the back of my neck. I reach down to slide my hand under my skirt to take the edge off, to hell with these people, when Rafe’s hand suddenly snatches my wrist, holding it firmly against my side.
“Behave and I’ll let you finish.” Rafe murmurs into my ear, his breath on my skin giving me goosebumps and making me clench around him. The teasing was driving me mad. I needed to move. I needed to rock back and forth between bounces on his cock. I needed him to slap my pussy as I chased my release. I needed..
“Easy. You’re tightening around me. Wouldn’t want me to get mine without yours, would you?” Rafe taunts in my ear. My nostrils flare and I debate standing. To hell with this.
Just then a book slams shut and one of his friends announces it’s time to get something to eat. The rest follow suit except one girl who looks between us, her murderous glare landing on me before she follows the rest of them. I suddenly felt privileged to be sitting on Rafe’s cock out in the open if it brought the jealous bitch some misery.
Now that we’re alone, Rafe sits his book down and wraps his free arm around my waist. My heart rate kicks into high gear as he positions my legs on either side of his, opening me obscenely wide while immobilizing me.
“R-Rafe—.” I start, my body beginning to tremble.
“Take your panties from my pocket and put them in your mouth. I know you’re a desperate little bitch but I need you to be quiet.” Rafe murmurs, his hand sliding between my legs to stroke my clit. I buck and whimper as I reach back with a shaky hand and dig my panties from his jacket pocket. This was so degrading but I didn’t care. His cock was so hard inside me and rubbing against places that threatened to send me to another dimension. If he wanted me to put my own panties in my mouth, I would.
“Good girl.” Rafe purred, lightly slapping his hand against my pussy. My body seized and I gripped the table for dear life. Anyone could walk around the corner and catch us. We could be expelled.
All thoughts left me as Rafe begin to move, slowly pumping his cock in and out of me like his soul purpose in life was to see me lose control.
“Fuck yes.” Rafe breathed, pumping his hips harder and faster. The sound of my arousal was obvious with every push and pull of his thick cock. The thought of being caught only made me more wet. I was right there. Right. There.
“Put your feet on the floor and grab the table.” Rafe suddenly says, helping me maneuver my shaking legs over his to reach the floor. My body tightened around his again as I brought my legs together, tears filling my eyes as I did as I was told.
“Lift up just a little and hold it. Don’t move.” Rafe rasps, his voice thick with need too. Good. I wanted this to drive him just as crazy.
The moment I used the table to lift myself up, he started to fuck me hard and fast, his pelvis slamming against my ass where he yanked my skirt up. I buried my face against my arm to keep from making any noises even with my own panties in my mouth as he pistoned into me, using his hands on my hips to pull me back into every thrust. All while he stayed sitting down.
“Cum you little slut. Let me feel it drip down to my fucking balls.” I didn’t have to be told twice. My eyes rolled into the back of my head, my body seizing and convulsing as he ripped the most intense orgasm of my life from my body. I knew I’d made a mess. I faintly heard a small gasp that I knew hadn’t came from me so I lifted my eyes to find the mean girl from earlier watching us with wide eyes and her hand over her mouth. I smiled at her just as Rafe huffed a breath and spilled inside me, flooding my insides with his warmth.
“Goddamn.” Rafe breathed, pulling me back against him as the evidence of what we’d just done drips from me. The girl turns and flees and that makes me happier.
“How about you get underneath this table and clean up our mess then we’ll go get dinner?” Rafe whispers in my ear, his hand sliding between us to cup where we’re still connected. I turn my head to face him and he pulls my panties from my mouth and kisses me hard. I begin to rock my hips again, my cares from earlier completely forgotten about as I chase another high. Rafe pulls back from the kiss to smirk at me, his hand sliding lower to force two fingers inside me along with his cock. I wince. The stretch too much but too good to stop.
“Greedy fucking slut. One more then you’re going to lap up this mess.” Rafe breathes, kissing me again to silence me as I fall apart again.
If he wanted me to crawl naked on broken glass just to taste him.. I would.
You didn’t tell Rafe Cameron no.
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oracle-of-dream · 9 months ago
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(switch ceo!jay request!) (sub/bttm leaning) ceo!jay who was being escorted out of an event after drunk man jumped on stage while giving his speech, almost successfully attacking jay if not for the reader stopping him in time. heading home, jay felt tired and took a shower, after getting out he sees the reader on the couch and decides to sit beside him, while doing so he finds a bruise on his forearm, feeling guilty he offers to nurse it himself, the readwr refuses but after a bit of back and forth he managed to get the reader to sit sitll while he gets an icepack. and while they're sitting there, they just casually have a conversation, making intense eye contact, the readers staring at jay's lips which he notices. one thing leads to another, and suddenly they're making out.
u can decide how the smut part will go 😭 i'm not very good at it, but ik and can trust in ur abilities! pls take ur time, have a wonderful day and i hope ur not feeling pressured w all the requests coming in! :]
CEO's Bodyguard
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Summary: It's your job to keep Jay safe. It's another large-scale meeting with many guests–more like potential hazards. Keep him safe, and bring him home. That's all you're concerned about.
Warnings: Male Reader, CEO!Jay, Bodyguard!Reader, Slight Violence, Blowjob (Jay Rec.), Cum swallowing, Forced Deepthroat, Begging, Control Switching/Power dynamics, Hair Pulling, Spanking, Breeding
Wordcount: 3.59k
"Welcome, and thank you all for coming," Jay said. The room gave applause to receive him. He raised his hand to silence the room. Jay led into his speech, which he'd practiced multiple times while you drove him from place to place. You'd heard it what felt like a hundred times. Your knees and back ached from standing for so long. It was necessary for Jay's safety, you're number one priority. Most of your duties were more like being Jay's secretary, even as his bodyguard he always gave you tasks to take it easy on you.
You've worked for Jay over the last year and a half. Jay's father became unable to lead his company anymore, forcing Jay to take over. As a young CEO, more than a few people were willing to try and take advantage of him. Jay's nature, or his hate for people attempting to manipulate him, has made him enemies who would rather see him removed from power. Jay started hiring bodyguards a while ago but ended up firing each after a few weeks. The interview process was invasive and dismissive; a one-on-one meeting with Jay. Alone. He probed you with strange and meticulous questions; ranging from your family and friends to your finances. Jay always seemed to know more about everything than everyone else. He was extremely well-informed and investigated you for your interview. But the last question was the one that stuck out to you.
"Finally, y/n. This is your last question. If our lives get entangled, closer than originally anticipated, would you still be able to do your job?" Jay asked.
You tilted your head. "Entangled how?"
"...If you were to, seek a deeper relationship with me."
You straightened up rigidly. "O-Oh! I'd never dream of it, sir! I must protect you."
"But, if it were to happen, will it impede your work."
"Never! I'd protect you, in whatever situation!" You were a little desperate for a job, and more than willing to say whatever you needed to. You didn't think twice about it when you said it, but afterward, you couldn't stop thinking about the response you'd given. Or, why would he ask a question like that?
You were so lost in thought, you didn't realize someone was approaching the stage! A man, clearly drunk, stumbled as he made his way up the stairs behind the stage. Jay was so focused on his speech that he wasn't aware, not that it was his responsibility to be... There was no time to rush backstage and run after the man, you'd have to approach from the front!
You rushed the stage. Jay's eyes snapped to you, he maintained his cool but you could sense his concern. You jumped on stage, rolling cleanly, and you stood between Jay and the man.
"You don't deserve that spot!" He shouted as he swung at Jay.
You blocked the man's swing. He grabbed your other arm and twisted it, making you grit your teeth as you connected a blow to the man's head and his head slammed into your chin. The man fell to the ground and you caught him. You kept the man from hitting his head and dragged him away. Jay cracked a joke about the man having too much to drink and carried on with his speech, this time with you standing at a distance behind him on stage. As he concluded his speech, you directed him offstage.
His eyebrows furrowed as he looked at the unconscious man. "What was that about?"
"Just someone who had a bit too much to drink. Let's get home, for now, sir. You've got an early morning tomorrow."
Jay sighed. "Of course I do..." You guided him to the exit, and your employer said their goodbyes to his business partners. He was always so good at keeping a smile, even when he was more than a bit exhausted. You'd seen him run on no sleep for almost two days, having back-to-back meetings all day, and still kept his face up. The night sky was empty, the stars hidden behind the skyscrapers. Jay looked up at the sky, searching, as you had a valet bring the car forward.
Jay spoke without looking back to the ground. "Do you ever think about what it would be like to see a star up close, y/n?"
"I don't think I have, sir."
"I think... It would be the most beautiful thing ever." You didn't know how to respond, especially when he got into moods like this. It didn't happen often in front of you, but maybe it was a sign that he was getting comfortable around you. Sometimes he'd ask you philosophical questions throughout an entire car ride, most rhetorical as he knew you didn't know what to say.
The two of you stood in silence until the car arrived. Following protocol, you scanned the inside and outside for anything suspicious. Once you confirmed its safety, you opened the door for Jay and allowed him into the car. In the driver's seat, the car was programmed to navigate you back to Jay's penthouse. You drove without a word, but the pain in your jaw kept flaring every few minutes... That bastard might've bruised your jaw or even broken a tooth. Another thing to take care of now...
"You okay?"
Jay's voice snapped you out of the autopilot you were in. "Sorry, I wasn't listening. What did you need?"
"You keep touching your chin and rolling your jaw. Are you okay?"
You could see Jay staring at you in the mirror. "It's nothing to worry about. I think I just scratched myself earlier."
Jay's eyebrows furrowed but he turned and looked out the window. "I can't have my bodyguard getting banged up. If you're not able to take care of yourself, who will protect me?"
"If I remember correctly. When you hired me, you told me you didn't need me."
Jay scoffed. "Well, at the time I didn't. But things changed, and now I do. Is that an issue?"
"No, sir."
"That's what I thought." Jay crossed his arms. "If you've got an issue with our arrangement, then speak and we can have it amended." You chuckled softly. He was the cutest when getting protective over you, but also somehow defensive when you called him out on it.
The rest of the drive was quiet. Jay drifted off to sleep, softly snoring in the back seat. His soft caramel skin and slicked-back dark hair shined in the streetlights that passed. His cold expression melted away to reveal the man you knew. This was when he was the most authentic, silently sleeping. No cameras, phone calls, meetings, or clients, just Jay being alone with himself–and you, of course. Originally you thought it was weird to sleep in the same house as Jay, insisting that he'd be safe in his home alone but when he offered double your salary to move in you couldn't refuse.
As you pulled into the driveway, putting the car in park, Jay stirred from his sleep. He stretched and wiped the sleep from his eyes, acting like he'd been awake the whole time. "Jesus, that felt like forever, I'm glad to finally be back home."
You nodded as you opened his door from him. "Of course sir, I apologize about how long it took to get you back home safely."
He looked at you, reaching out but hesitating. "It's not your fault. It's just traffic." He yawned. "Let's just go." You tried to hold it in, but couldn't stop your body's reaction to also yawn. As your jaw stretched open and you breathed deeply, you winced softly as your jaw faltered in pain. Jay's eyes widened. "I knew you were just trying to be tough. He did end up hurting you..." His face moved to a pained expression as his eyes scrolled over you, looking for more injuries.
"Sir, it's nothing. Just some soreness."
He held up his hand, silencing you. "You'll let me take care of that. Now. I won't have you complaining about it tomorrow." When Jay was insistent there was no turning him around from what he wanted, even as you protested. He led you inside, upstairs to his bedroom. "Sit on the bed, I have medicine in my bathroom."
As he drifted off into the bathroom, you moved near the bed obediently but awkwardly sat next to it. You knew Jay was a clean person, he would be bothered if your dirty clothes messed up his sheets. Jay's bedroom was one of the biggest rooms in the house. It was painted a dark gray with a monochrome color scheme. all of the artwork he'd made was on his walls, matching the darkly colored motif of the room. Even though it was all so dark, there was so much emotion poured into it, you couldn't help but smile slightly.
After a few minutes, Jay emerged from the bathroom in different clothes with a first aid kit. He wore a large dress shirt and flowy pajama pants, and his hair was slightly damp from rinsing out the product in it. He sat on the bed. "What are you doing on the floor?"
"My clothes are dirty."
"Then I'll come down."
"The floor isn't clean. You'll get your pajamas dirty, you can apply the medicine up there. I'll sit tall." You sat on your knees, back straight, looking up at Jay as you waited for him to begin applying medicine.
He rolled his eyes as he opened the medicine box. He started applying medicine to your jaw with his left hand while his right gently held your face in place. "You really should be more careful." He experimentally dragged his finger along your jaw until he hit the spot, making you wince away from him. "I... care about you."
"That's very kind, sir."
Jay gritted his teeth. "Y/n. The rules."
"Sorry... Jay." It was a part of the house rules that while you lived there, at home specifically. You weren't allowed to call him sir or mister. You were required to refer to him as Jay.
"It's okay. And I'm glad you're doing your job, but it's not often I see you getting injured."
"I was just a little distracted today. It won't happen again."
He raised an eyebrow. "You, distracted? By what?"
You looked Jay in his eyes. "Your speech. It was really captivating. I couldn't stop listening."
Jay's mouth parted softly as he looked away, focusing on your jaw. "Well, I'm glad you liked it."
"You're really persuasive. And your speaking voice is always so clear, it's hard not to listen closely."
"Y/n..."
You continued. "Even the way you were styled today really brought you to the centerpiece of the whole event."
"Y/n. Stop talking. That's an order." Your mouth was filled with cement, unable to speak–even breathing was difficult. "You know I'm not very good with compliments..." Jay tucked his hair behind his ear. "It makes me shy."
You blinked slowly, watching Jay's careful expression.
Jay avoided your eyes, leaning in to look closer at your chin–leaving only a few inches between you. "Is there anywhere else it hurts?"
You shook your head.
"Honest?"
You nodded.
Jay scratched his ear. "I don't believe you... I just want to–" Jay hesitated at touching your collar. "C-Can I... unbutton your shirt a little? Just to see." You reply by sitting up taller, raising your chest out to Jay. His hands slightly shook as he undid the first few buttons at the top of your shirt, sliding your tie off too. He opened it, revealing your bare chest to him. His fingertips ghosted over your skin before pulling away. "Y/n, I think I'm close to making a decision that I don't know how to make. What should I do?"
"What decision, Jay?"
"I think I..." Jay hesitated biting his lip. "I think I want to be closer to you."
"Closer to me? Like how?"
Jay rolled his eyes as his cheeks turned a soft pink. "Jesus Christ, y/n! You really need me to spell it out!?" Jay took your hands and guided them to the buttons on his shirt. "Undo them," He commanded.
"Jay–"
"Please don't make me say it twice." You focused on unbuttoning Jay's shirt, as you slid it down past his shoulders and revealed his bare torso. His hips rolled up slightly, pointing out the hard cock that throbbed inside his pants. "You've got one chance to back out. If you don't want to go further, say it and we'll pretend like this never happened," Jay muttered as his eyes dropped to the floor.
"I'm so honored you'd consider me, sir. I don't think I'm worthy of you... But if you want to have me tonight, then I am more than willing."
Jay's eyes locked with yours before his gaze dropped to your lips. "Don't call me sir," He mumbled before leaning in for a kiss.
Jay's lips were plush pillows that bounced off your lips. He placed his hands on your shoulders, fingers tensing and gripping your skin as you deepened the kiss. Your hands threaded into Jay's hair, still slightly wet, which earned a moan from your boss. He pulled away from the kiss, wide-eyed and pink-faced.
"I-I didn't– That wasn't me!"
"Then who was it?" You chuckled.
"I don't know!" Jay hit your shoulder. "Just hurry up and do the next part." Jay laid on his back with his eyes closed.
"The next part?"
Jay lifted himself on his elbows. "Aren't you going to stick it in me?"
"You wanted me to fuck you?!"
"You're getting that now!?" Jay facepalmed. "I'm not very experienced with a man, so I don't know how to do this... So, help me please." His pupils dilated as he begged for you. Jay had never been so vulnerable with you before, and you couldn't lie that it was turning you on more than you thought it would. You'd imagined having sex with Jay but imagined him as more of a dominant top, or even a power bottom. but to see him so... submissive. It was the hottest thing you'd ever seen.
"Did you prepare yourself at all? I don't want to just 'stick it in' and hurt you."
Jay covered his face. "Yes... That's what I was doing in the bathroom."
He was so cute. "Oh, so you planned on seducing me tonight then?"
"Y/n, I swear, if you don't hurry up and fuck me. I'll fire you right now."
You smiled. "Oh? Jay, I thought the rules of the house were that we're equal here. Aren't we supposed to treat each other nicely?" He grunted. "Then how about some foreplay or something?"
"You can suck my dick with your foreplay," Jay spat. You smiled as you slipped his pants off in one motion, making your boss yelp as he covered himself. He was commando under his pants, and his cock was already leaking.
"I think I'll take you up on that offer." You smiled as you moved his hands from his crotch to your neck. His cock twitched in the air as you pulled Jay to a comfortable part of the edge of the bed, his legs hanging over the side. You slotted yourself in between his legs and kissed his tip. His knees twitched at your touch, brushing against your head. You kissed his tip a few more times, his pre-cum sticking to your lips.
"Hurry up already," He grunted. "In your mouth!" He pulled on your hair, pulling you down as you slowly took him into your mouth. "Ahh fuck, you're so warm!" His head fell back as he guided you to bob your head, pulling and pushing you as he liked. "Your mouth–it's warm! So wet, and tight too!" When his tip hit the back of your throat, you tensed as you felt the urge to gag which made your throat clamp down onto Jay's shape. "Oh fuck! That! Again, do that," Jay moaned as he forced your head down, forcing you to gag and gurgle on his cock. "I'll–I'm gonna cum! Please, swallow!" He grunted. You leaned forward, ready, as he spilled his load into your mouth. "Take it, swallow, drink it all!" Jay's voice got raspy and desperate as his eyes rolled back from the explosion in his head.
"I didn't think you'd finish that fast..." You wiped the spit from your mouth.
"Well, you didn't have to suck it. And you asked for foreplay..."
"I'm not complaining. Just, remember, I plan on cumming tonight too." You smirked at him. "You had your fun, but now I'll be in charge, okay?" Jay frowned but you weren't asking. Before you could give him the chance to ask any questions, you flipped him onto his stomach and slipped a finger inside him.
"Oh~ you could've given me a warning!" Jay moaned as he ground against your finger.
"You didn't need a warning. And, don't you think you should be grateful? I'm stretching you a little extra, just in case."
Jay scoffed. "Why? I said I did it, didn't I?"
A crack rang out as you spanked him. "Jay, where did your manners go?" Jay's jaw hung open, still reeling from being spanked. He'd never been spanked before, but his cock twitched from the pain.
"Again."
"Again, what?"
Jay groaned into the sheet. "Spank me again, please."
"What a nice boy," You cooed as you spanked him again, harder than before. "You're a good boy, aren't you? You just forgot your manners a bit." You spanked him again. "Beg for it."
Jay turned to look at you. "Are you loving this? Hitting and bossing me around? I'm not begging for shit." His hair was a mess, his skin glistened with sweat, and his ass was turning red.
"Jay~ don't misbehave. I'll have to punish you a bit." You reached forward and pulled Jay's hair, making him wince.
"W-Wait!"
"Manners."
"P-Please. Don't pull on it..." Jay begged softly.
You released his hair, kissing his neck as an apology. "Much better. Now, can you beg for cock? I want to hear you say it."
Jay remained silent. You gave him another smack for encouragement. "Fine! Y/n, please fuck me with your big cock!" You said nothing and rubbed Jay's ass softly. You didn't think he'd say it... "Oh fuck you! You wanted me to say it."
"Language," You warned. "If you wanted my cock so badly, that's all you needed to say." You pushed your tip into Jay's waiting hole.
"Oh, holy fuck, you're huge. It's so much..."
"Jay. That's just my tip."
Jay arched his back, waiting for you. "I know that! Your tip is just big!"
You pushed until you hilted Jay, burying your cock completely inside him. "You're squeezing like crazy, Jay."
Jay was a moaning mess under you. Even as he twitched around you, he made himself moan. "Oh, my–fuck me!" He shouted as you slid out before slamming back into him. Over and over, you pounded into him.
"Don't make me do all the work, Jay," You grunted as you pushed him forward. He held his breath as he moved himself on your cock, fucking himself into the mattress. "Can you try harder?" You pushed down on his back, making him hit that spot, making him scream louder. As soon as you found his spot, you took back cover as you fucked into it. "Wanna cum, Jay?" Jay let out a series of moans and groans, forming a semi-approving answer. "Ask for it then," You smirked as you pulled out completely, letting your cock rest on his ass.
"Y-Y/n! You can't–Please! Please! Let me cum on it, I'll cum from your cock so much. I'll even let you finish in me, just let me cum!"
"You said it, so I'll take that. Go ahead and cum then." You slammed back into Jay completely as his hole welcomed your cock with a tight squeeze. Jay's moans went high-pitched as his back arched more and his eyes rolled. He was drooling on the sheet as he came all over the edge of the bed. You didn't take much more after him, this orgasm squeezing you for everything. "I'm gonna cum in you. I'll fucking breed you into being my husband!" Your hips stuttered as your climax washed over you, your cum spilling into Jay as he moaned again. "Every drop, keep squeezing it," You ordered.
When you both came down from your highs, you took Jay into his bathroom and started a warm bath for him. Jay occasionally twitched from the sensation of you helping him wash the cum out of him, he was too embarrassed to ask you to do it but you could tell he didn't know what to do.
Your boss stroked your jaw. "How's it doing?"
"It's a little sore from sucking cock but–" Jay punched you. "It's much better. Thank you, Jay."
Jay rolled his eyes. "If I'm going to be your husband, you're going to need to call me something else."
Your mind rolled back to what you'd said earlier in the heat of the moment. "Jay, I didn't mean it like that–"
"You think you can just hit it and leave? You're stuck with me. And I'm not letting you go. So, your husband is demanding that you call him that." Jay held his head high as his eyes gleamed.
"Okay... Husband." You chuckled as you kissed his forehead.
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redroomreflections · 10 months ago
Text
Not Easily Broken Chapter 6
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Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader
Summary: Natasha and Reader go through a tragic divorce
Masterlist | General Masterlist
6/10
Note: Yes,i know the picture has a watermark. it's 2 am.
W/c: 4.2k (less painful to edit!)
Rating: M (Minors DNI; angst, fluff, smut, heartbreak, heart fix? the best ending for them coming soon)
You don’t know how long you’ve stared at the blank paper. Its thin blue lines taunted you. The questions on the tiny notebook assigned to you were intimidating. You’re sitting here, at the kitchen counter, nursing a mug of tea and looking down at the paper. This is the first part of the assignment. Once you’re going to fail. There are several steps Cheryl gave to get things going for both of you. Answer the questions. Find something both of you like to do. Discuss them together. That should be easy, right? Wrong. It’s been four days and counting and you have yet to write anything. Not that there’s nothing to write. No. You have a lot to say. It just can’t be on paper. Neither of you has been good at expressing your thoughts. You’re worse. You come from a family where conflict was solved with abandonment and passive aggressiveness. Two things you do quite well. This venture into vulnerability is foreign. You’re afraid of being the bad guy again. You don’t want to address the unknown. What if even after all of this you and Natasha don’t work out?
You’ve been doing a lot of self-reflecting the past week. There’s always something in the back of your mind that says you’re ruining her life again. You’re ruining your children’s lives. Everything you worked for you ruined. This time would be different. You’re coming into this with a clear head and a fresh perspective. You want your life back. You want your wife back. You want your family. It’s not like you cheated. You didn’t step out of your relationship. You sometimes wish it were so easy. Maybe then your actions can be excused. That’s not the correct way to say it. Cheating is never excusable. You guess it would have been another way to avoid accountability. You blame yourself every day for what happened. Even then guilt is not enough. 
You sigh. Back to the questions. You hold the pencil in your hand—first question. 
“You lead separate lives despite living in the same household.” You read aloud. Wow. Okay. That’s a tough one right off the bat. It’s relevant. It makes sense considering the context. You write yes. You move on to the second question. “You mostly speak about finances or household chores. Question three you have sex less than once weekly.” You stop your reading right there. You’re three for three. If this is how this is going you’re going to be in therapy for a while. 
Were things really that bad? You wonder if Natasha is thinking the same things. 
Across town, Natasha is indeed wondering the same things. She’s just finished up her run for the morning, having gotten the kids out of the door and off to school, and now she has the morning to herself. She’s sitting on the couch, her feet propped up on the coffee table, as the notebook rests in her lap. She pushes her glasses further up her nose. 
“Sex less than once weekly?” She reads. ‘Sex never’. She writes. It’s true. Besides the phone sex last week she doesn’t remember the last time you two were so intimate. Well, she can. Emma’s fifth birthday party. She would hardly count that as something to brag about. While you’re skilled in the bedroom, she felt dirty afterward. She felt used in a way she wasn’t all that willing to share with you. Sex with you has always meant so much more to her. She hopes it’s the same for you. She doesn’t think about it for too long. She can’t dwell on the fact that her body aches for you. Natasha Romanoff knows her worth. She is aware she could go out and find anyone to fuck. She doesn’t have to go far truthfully. She doesn’t want that. It’s kind of pathetic and she would never admit it to anyone. 
Natasha is about to answer another question for the checklist when the doorbell rings. She glances at it, hoping that whoever it is will go away when the ringing becomes more insistent. Natasha rolls her eyes, slamming the book down against the coffee table, to go and answer the door. She swings it open, ready to give whomever it is a piece of her mind when she stops. She crosses her arms and glowers at her visitor suspiciously. 
“Romanoff,” Richard grins at her. “Don’t you look swell?” He admires her messy hair, tank top, and running shorts. He waves a file in his hand. “I have work.” He offers her one of the coffees in his and she takes it. 
“I thought we were meeting at the tower,” Natasha drops her hands from the door. She walks away without offering him a second glance. He would follow. What she doesn’t see is him checking out her ass as he steps inside. He closes the door behind with and walks with her toward the living room. 
“I thought this was much better,” Richard shrugs. “I was in the neighborhood.”
“I’m sure you were,” Natasha rolls her eyes. “Okay, give me a minute to change and I’ll be right back down. I have a couple of notes over there.” She waves her hand somewhere in the room. Though Richard is an asshole she knows he won’t do anything to put her in danger. She leaves him to his own devices to change out of her workout gear. Not that her new outfit would be much better. 
Richard stands, walks over to the couch to sit, and places the file on the coffee table. He spots the notebook she’s been writing in. It’s safe to assume it’s the one she permitted him to read. It’s not. 
“Healthy relationship checklist,” He reads to himself. “No sex?” He whistles. Wow. That’s disappointing. 
“I’m going to have to ban you from my house soon,” Natasha calls down the stairs. He quickly places the notebook back where he found it. Natasha comes into the living room in a simple blue blouse and slacks. She glances at the notebook, noting that it’s moved a few inches, and tsking. “Richard, seriously, you’re my partner. One I didn’t want. At least have the decency of giving me privacy.”
“I’m sorry I was curious,” He raises his hands in surrender. “If it makes you feel any better I haven’t done it in a while either.”
“No, it doesn’t make me feel any better,” Natasha shakes her head. “And I don’t believe you. You’re looking at a sexual harassment complaint and a broken nose if we keep talking about this.”
“Fine,” He shakes his head. “I just think you deserve better.” At Natasha’s warning look he clamps his mouth shut. “I need a consult. Fury wants the entire team on this case but we need your expertise.”
“Why would you need my expertise?” Natasha sits across from him. She takes the file, flipping through the pages before she shakes her head. “What is this?” 
“A recruitment center,” Richard describes. “Someone is recruiting young girls to be assassins. Training them to go out and do their bidding. We want to know the best way to, uh, get in there and get out.” He gestures. 
Natasha frowns. They could have very well asked Melina Yelena or anyone but her. She’s not an expert on brainwashed children. She only knows so much. Even then she provides him with an answer.
“You’re going to need to get someone on the inside obviously,” She says. “Preferably someone young. Wanda Maximoff could pass. She gets in. Find out who knows what. You protect her with your life. Make sure she feels safe at all times. Know that if it’s as bad as this film reads some of them will die.”
“That’s dark,” Richard comments.
“Well, it’s not all sunshine and roses,” Natasha mumbles. She sets the file back down. “Is that all you needed from me?” 
“Well, yeah,” Richard nods. 
“Well, I’d like to be alone in my home now,” Natasha says none too politely. She passes him the large envelope. They both stand. She walks him to the door and to both their surprises you’re on the other side. You’re a bit off-put by Richard being there. 
“I’m sorry,” You shake your head. “I stopped by to..” You trail off. 
“Y/n, so good to see you,” Richard offers you a fake smile that you don’t return. 
“He’s leaving,” Natasha makes a face at him. She wasn’t really in the mood for this nonexistent love triangle thing that goes on every time you’re all in the same space. Not that it matters to her. Richard would never be someone that is on her romantic radar. Not when she only has eyes for you. 
“Right, leaving,” Richard nods. He’s about to make a joke when Natasha punches him before he can even open his mouth. He holds his sore arm, offering her an “ow!” Before he shakes his head. He walks down the stairs and to his car without another word. 
Natasha’s gaze returns to you and the brown paper bag you have in your hands. 
“Is that for me?” She asks and you nod silently. Seeing her with Richard does things to you. You follow her into the house where she closes and locks the door. She takes the bag from your hands to set it on the hallway table. You’re not sure who makes the first move but Natasha is in your arms, kissing you, feeling you, and walking backward toward the couch. Your hands are everywhere on her body. You feel the skin under her shirt, down her sides, and her hips, as you push her gently to lie down on the couch. Your kiss is hungry and rough and full of passion. She moans at the feel of your weight atop her. She kisses you back. When your hand slides up her shirt, pinching her nipple through the sports bra she’s wearing, she rips her lips from yours to moan. Her cries go straight to your core. You’re lying here between her legs, kissing her neck now, and holding her right where you want her. Natasha enjoys your touch. It excites her. It makes her feel wanted. She raises her hand to place it over yours. 
“Y/n,” Natasha begs. She doesn’t know exactly what for. She imagines it would be so easy to allow you to take her right here. Right now. The kids aren’t home. There’s no one here to stop her. Even so, she can’t help the nagging feeling at the back of her mind. “Y/n.” The tone of her voice stops you in your tracks. You lift to look into her concerned eyes. 
“What’s wrong?” You ask. You take in her kiss-swollen lips, her mussed hair, and her flushed skin. She looks so damn sexy. 
“You did this last time,” Natasha points out. Her voice is small and barely there. You can tell she’s trying to keep the conflict at a minimum. You give her a confused look. What was she talking about? “It’s
 it’s stupid.” She shakes her head. “I can't help but notice. Every time Richard comes around you feel the need to stake your claim in some way.”
“I don’t do that,” You scoff. She gestures to the spot on her neck that’s formed into a slight purple bruise. When did you do that? You deflate, sitting up, removing yourself from her embrace. You take deep breaths. Were you doing that to her? 
“I didn’t want to bring it up to upset you,” Natasha instantly misses your touch. She fixes her shirt, adjusts her bra, and moves to sit closer to you. “I don’t want you to want me because someone else does.”
“Do you seriously think that?” You question. “Nat, baby,” You breathe. “I want you because I missed you. I want you because I find you attractive. I want you because you’re everything.” You take her hand in yours. “I don’t want you to think I’m doing it to show ownership over you. That’s not something I want.”
“I want to be yours,” Natasha confesses quietly. “Just not like that.”
“I understand,” You nod. Natasha kisses your pouting lips. You smile. The notebook on the coffee table catches your eye. “So you’ve been doing the assignment.”
“I have,” Natasha glances at the paper. 
“It’s pretty eye-opening,” You say and she nods in agreement. “I didn’t think things were that bad for us. I mean, I know, we got a divorce. I just
it puts things into perspective.” 
“It does,” Natasha runs a hand through her hair. 
“I want this to work for us,” You admit. “I’m sorry. I am. I want us to work.”
“Me too,” Natasha kisses your lips again. “Did you bring your book? We could go over some of the questions now.”
“I did,” You say as you reach over her legs to the bags you brought. You pull out the book, cracking it open to the page you’ve written on, while Natasha opens hers. “So, I’ve realized a lot of these are things we’ve done at the beginning of our relationship. We seemed to enjoy each other then. Pre-kids I guess.”
“Hmm,” Natasha hums. 
“Okay, this question,” You go to one you haven’t answered yet. “Please be truthful. Don’t hold back because you think it’s going to hurt my feelings.” Natasha nods. She could do that. “Do you feel comfortable being yourself around your partner?”
Natasha bites her lip. “I have always felt I could be myself with you. There were times I didn’t think I could. That maybe I needed to play a part to, um, make you happy.”
“I felt the same way,” You mumble. “Nat, I’m -”
“You’re sorry that’s understandable,” She shakes her head. “It’s something we have to work on. I love you for you. I’ve always loved you for you.”
“I’ve always been attracted to everything about you,” You begin. “I’ve always loved your personality. Your tenacity. Your humor. Your ability to be vulnerable.” Natasha blushes under your intense gaze. She takes her pen to write a few things before moving on to the next question. 
“You rarely hug, hold hands, or touch each other in a non-sexual way,” She reads aloud. There’s a silence that neither of you breaks. “The butt rubs stopped.” She points out. 
“What?” You look at her in surprise. “I guess they have. Was that the first indicator that something was wrong with you?”
“It was one,” Natasha shrugs. “I just thought you needed space and it’s not always a sexual thing but we stopped touching each other. It wasn’t only you. I stopped too.”
“Damn,” You curse under your breath. “We could try it now? I mean, one of our exercises was extended cuddling time. Now would be the perfect opportunity.” You offer and Natasha likes that idea. She takes both notebooks to sets them down on the table. You lie down first and she crawls on top of you. Her head rests on your chest, your arms wrap around her waist, and you simply hold each other. Your shared breathing and warmth lull you to a place of comfort. Natasha wriggles her butt, silently asking for your hands on her, and you oblige. You reach down, and your right hand travels over the slope of her soft, supple behind, before you rub. It’s tentative touches at first. Just a simple swipe of your hand before your rubs turn into kneading. You massage the covered flesh in your hands and Natasha hums. 
“I missed this,” She mutters into your chest. She peeks her head up at you. Her eyes travel from your eyes to your lips. She follows through with whatever thought she’s having and she kisses you. Her kiss is gentle and reassuring. She lingers, her lips brushing against yours before she opens her eyes again. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” You kiss her again. “So much, Natasha.” She smiles widely. She can’t describe how happy she feels right now. She’s here with you, in your arms, and there’s no other place she’d rather be. Her happiness surges to something else entirely. Suddenly all she wants is you. She kisses you again, deeper, harder, this time it’s all teeth and tongue. She sucks her bottom lips into your mouth, eliciting a moan from deep inside you and your grip on her ass loosens. 
“We shouldn’t,” She breathes between kisses. 
“You’re right,” You nod in agreement. “Though she did say we could.”
“It’s not like we need permission,” Natasha smirks. “We’ve done this before.”
You shrug. She may be right. 
“Which means I know how to get creative,” You flip the both of you over in one swift move. You adjust Natasha against the pillows, her hair fanning out under her, as you lie beside her legs. “Interesting choice of attire today.”
“It was either this or the workout gear,” She laughs. 
“It’s okay, makes it more fun,” You take nimble fingers to the buttons of her blouse. Natasha watches as you unbutton to reveal her smooth skin. “Tell me to stop.” You say but she doesn’t say a word. 
“What if I don’t want you to stop?” She challenges. You slide your fingers under her bra cap, feeling her nipple harden under your palm, and she shivers. 
“I’ve always liked you,” You joke and she nips at your chin. “I love you.” You correct and she hums. Much better. You twist her nipple, bordering on harsh, and Natasha practically jumps out of her skin. God, she’s missed this. You lean your head down, pushing the cup to the side, to suck her rosy nipple into your mouth. You swirl your tongue, alternating between licking and sucking and Natasha drops her head against the pillows again. You make sloppy sucking noises, only proving to turn her on further, as she rests a hand over your head to keep you there. “I want to make you cum.” You release her nipple with a pop. 
Natasha is a grown woman. She likes sex. She enjoys sex. She’s about to throw away all of her reservations and tell you to do whatever. You offer an alternative. You button her slacks, zipping them down far enough for your hands to reach inside and you slide in. Your fingers ghost over the lips of her panties, pushing to feel the wetness seeping through, and Natasha preens. 
“Like this then?” You say and she nods. That makes it more fun. You rake your nails over Natasha's pussy, finding the small nub peeking through the fabric, and you pay the most attention to that. Natasha arches her back and forces you to press against her deeper. “You like that baby?” You ask. “Is this what you wanted?” You ask as you work your magic through the cotton of her panties. Natasha nods her head, mouth open, eyes closed in complete pleasure. 
“Ngh,” She moans her words caught in her throat, as she rocks her hips into your fingers. It feels so damn good. This entire act may seem a bit immature but she doesn’t care. Your fingers are on her, practically inside of her, and even with the thin barrier of her underwear she feels everything. You are firm in your movements. You’re purposeful with every circling of your fingers. Your movements go from small tight circles to wide and rough as Natasha moans louder. “Yes,” She hisses between her teeth. “Yes.”She whines and you know she’s close. 
“Chase it, baby,” You encourage. “You’re so pretty like this. At my mercy.” You continue. “The perfect doll. So open and wet for me.” You kiss her bare shoulder, her neck, her chest. Anywhere you can reach. It feels so dirty here. The smell of her sex reaching your nose. The sound of shuffling and moving against the cushions is the only thing heard in the entire house. You want to give Natasha this. You need to give it to her. “My pretty girl. I want to make you my pretty wife again.” You find yourself saying and it’s the right thing. Natasha stiffens, and her left hand comes to grip your right arm as her hips thrust against your fingers. Even through her panties, you can feel the sudden gush of wetness from her. Natasha whimpers pitifully as you talk her through it. “That’s it, baby. I know. Your pussy feels so good.” You whisper closer to her ear. When she finally comes down, Natasha falls limp against the cushions and you catch her. You remove your fingers from her pants, resting them by her side, as you watch the rise and fall of her chest. Natasha opens her eyes a moment later, a bit startled by the fact that you’re watching her, and she shakes her head. You kiss her swollen lips. 
“You did so well for me,” You praise and delight in her skin turning into an even redder shade. “I liked seeing you cum.”
“Stop,” Natasha groans. You chuckle. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me for your orgasm,” You deny her. “I had fun doing it. I’d like to do it again soon. Maybe with that strap, you’ve been asking for.”
“I’d like that.” Natasha nods. 
“This didn’t change things for you right?” You question and she tilts her head. “I mean to say that I meant what I said about making you my wife. It wasn’t just something I was saying to get you off.”
“It worked either way,” She quips. “I want that too. With you. Someday.”
“Good,” You smile. You trade kisses with Natasha, noting her sudden fatigue until you fall asleep in each other’s arms. You weren’t exactly intending to but you know you both need it. 
************
A few hours later you’re awakened by the sound of the front door unlocking. The kids are home. You awaken first, tapping Natasha awake, and she only nuzzles into your body further. She’s not ready to move away. 
“Unbelievable,” Yelena Belova’s voice interrupts your bliss. You both pop up to see the blonde standing over the two of you with a look of disgust on her face. “I can’t believe it.” Yelena shakes her head. 
“Mommy!” Emma and Ryan chorus. Natasha makes quick work of buttoning up her shirt and pants without them seeing. It’s Yelena who notices and shakes her head. 
“Is this why you wanted me to pick them up?” Yelena asks but then she drops Emma’s backpack onto the ground. “You know what, I’m leaving, I don’t even care.” She heads for the front door. You watch in trepidation as Natasha races after her. 
“Yelena,” Natasha calls after her younger sister. “Yelena, you’re acting like a child.”
“And you’re being stupid,” The woman insults. She turns back to Natasha with a disappointed look on her face. “You can’t think one quick fuck is going to make her stay. She left you. She left your kids. I can’t fucking believe this.”
“Yelena, that’s enough,” Natasha speaks firmly. “You don’t know what’s going on.”
“Well I have eyes,” Yelena argues back. “ I think I can see.”
“She’s my wife,” Natasha pleads with her sister to understand. 
“No,” Yelena rants. “She’s your ex-wife that broke your heart.”
“And she’s trying to make things better,”
“And just like that, you believe her? You’re smarter than that, Natasha.” Yelena scolds her sister. Natasha doesn’t speak. “Don’t call me when she decides she doesn’t want to play house anymore.” Yelena walks away after that. 
Natasha watches as her sister gets into her car and drives down the street. How was she supposed to respond to that? She turns back toward the house to see you standing on the steps waiting for her. 
“That was intense,” You comment. Natasha nods. You hold out your arms for her to step into them. She hides her face in your neck. 
“Am I being stupid?” She mumbles into your neck and you almost miss it. 
“No, Natasha,” You assure her. 
“Don’t make me look stupid,” She pleads. “I won’t survive it this time.” 
“Me either,” You hold her. 
You wouldn’t give this up again. You understand that Natasha’s family has a right to be cautious. They have a right to hate you. You could only hope that they see that you’re trying.
---> next part
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llamagoddessofficial · 2 years ago
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What about the noble trio from the pride and prejudice au falling for a servant girl at one of the parties they attend. Among all the noble women in their fancy gowns, there is a hardworking lady in uniform making sure everyone is tended to and everything is going well
😳 Anon how did you know that this dynamic is my weakness
Sans: A servant/maid Mc would have a much more favourable view of Sans than an Mc who was of his class. He might even be her favourite out of the skeleton trio. Despite his frosty nature with people in his own social standing, he's very genial and kind with servants, going out of his way to call them all (even those not of his household) by name- that kindness has made him very popular with the local servant population, Mc included. When he sees her, he doesn't dismiss her, he invites her to talk with him... if he ever sees her in town, he stops to politely chat with her as if they're the same standing. She enjoys his company greatly. If she's working for someone else he regularly compliments her work ethic, politeness, tidiness, etc. She's realistic, but... her favourite daydream is the one where Sans gets down on one knee.
If she worked for him, she'd be directly promoted to position more akin to a personal assistant than a maid. She helps him manage his finances, oversee his household- he wants her close by, and he openly expresses to her that she's the only one he trusts to help him with the things important to him.
Red: Though Red definitely has a reputation that makes some want to avoid working for him, his servants also tend to have the most fun. Unlike other noblemen, his servants have a lot of time off, and he openly allows gambling and drinking. He hires people who have a hard time getting other jobs, like the elderly or socially outcast- his reputation is wild anyway, he can afford to hire whoever he wants. Nobody is surprised.
She has the best rapport with Red. He breaks down the walls she built up from a lifetime of fearing the retribution of the upper class, he can make her laugh until her sides ache. He actively encourages her to speak her mind with him; she'll yell at him for beating her at cards and rather than losing her livelihood, she gets raucous laughter from him. After years of silent servitude it feels so good to speak freely with someone.
... She wouldn't work for him, though, unless he was her only option. Does she like him? Yes, so much. But his track record of wooing servants and nobles alike makes her unwilling to risk it... especially when he's so clearly fond of her, and she can't honestly say she doesn't like him too.
Skull: Skull is beloved by his household. Staff only have one rule; don't go into his room when he's in there. He never throws big parties, so no need for massive preparations, he's quiet and gentle in temper around humans, his only regular guest is the ever-popular Red. His staff are immensely defensive of him, and won't hear a word against him despite his unusual reputation.
She'd probably end up working for Skull, one way or another. One look at her, and he'd throw an obscene amount of money at whoever was employing her, he can't bare the thought of her not being his. She arrives to his household expecting the backbreaking work that tends to come with being the maid of a higher class family, and yet finds herself... not really working at all? Her only 'jobs' are what come with being the only person allowed into Skull's room. He keeps giving her nice clothes, rather than a uniform. Why are all the other servants so nice to her? Why do they keep manufacturing reasons for her to be alone with Skull? Why do they all smile like they know a joke she's not in on?
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howling-medic · 1 month ago
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All Duty Requires Purpose
Summary: Boromir has far better places to be than a meeting hall and far better things to do than listen to inane debate
A/N: @rivendell-poet talked about Boromir cuddling the other day, and then I couldn't stop thinking about it. Now this exists.
Warnings: Nothing at all...for literally the second time ever I think
Word Count: 1.6K
Rating: Gen
Pairings: Boromir x Reader
All Duty Requires Purpose
Meetings drained soldiers more than any battle ever could. Trading words, remaining still, when there was work to be done chafed against their nature. Today’s meetings dragged on into the night. Boromir sent for food because quarterly reports necessitated resolutions before anyone exited the meeting hall. His ornate, and well cushioned, oak chair with its finely carved wings had never caused his back to ache this much before, but he also had never sat in it this long. His mind began to wander to his wingback couch in your quarters where you undoubtedly were sitting. Without fail he could count on finding you tucked into one corner with your feet tucked under you and a book in your hand. Perhaps by now it had fallen from your grasp, and your arms were pillowing your head. 
He cleared his throat and dragged his focus back to the meeting. “We simply cannot afford to purchase fifty more horses! Not war horses anyways, and there’s no war to justify such an expense even if we could afford it!” Boromir reached the end of his patience. The Minister of War and Minister of Finance stood no chance of coming to any agreement.
“Gentlemen!” The room fell silent. “I believe I may have a solution to settle this, so we can all go home. We have no urgent need for war ready horses, as has been noted several times; however, we have soldiers who need cavalry training.” Neither minister looked pleased at Boromir’s interruption, nor at the opening of Boromir’s proposal. It mattered little. As Steward, he passed the reports and proposals for Aragorn to finalize, not the ministers. “What if we train our new recruits on the horses we currently possess? Not each man needs his own mount in a time of peace. We can begin negotiations with Rohan to establish an agreement for the purchase of horses with each breeding season. We can slowly grow our string of war horses at a lower cost than purchasing fully trained horses while also strengthening our ties with Rohan.” He fixed the two squabbling ministers with an icy gaze. “Do any take issue with this proposal?”
The room fell silent. Tension rippled through the assembled councillors,each waiting to see if the others would challenge Boromir. When none did, whether because they had no objections or they refused to be the first to try, Boromir rose. “Excellent. On that note, let us each retire. A draft of the Quarterly Report will arrive by sundown tomorrow all else remaining equal. As per usual, should you take issue with the notes pertaining to your position, send word to me.” The scraping of chairs and hushed murmurs interrupted by the groans of men idle too long stretching aching joints filled the room. Boromir took a moment to collect his thoughts while he sorted through his notes and tucked them into his leather folio. His hand itched to pull out a fresh scrap of parchment out and scribble down a list of all he needed to do before he could finally truly retire for the night. The day’s scribe handed him the veritable stack of the meeting minutes. Despite inwardly groaning at all the information he needed to review, he thanked the man - Damril? He really ought to remember, but it ranked low in priority compared to all the information vying for his limited attention tonight.
At least two advisors called out to him, but Boromir pretended not to hear, opting to make a beeline to the Steward’s House. He truly intended to go directly to his study and begin assembling a complete set of notes on the day’s meeting, if not a rough draft of the Quarterly Report itself, for Aragorn. Truly, that was his intent. The sound of a crackling fire and soft snores coming from the parlor stopped him in his tracks. With a sigh, he set the folio full of notes on a side table in the hall, stepped out of his boots, and laid his cloak on top of the folio.
Even with his boots off, the sound of his footfalls roused you. Boromir had never mastered the art of moving silently like Faramir had. Even Aragorn, two inches taller, could move more quietly than he could. You lifted your head nearly imperceptiblty. He thought you called his name in a questioning greeting, but all that was even vaguely intelligible was “Mir?” and even that was muffled by the pillow. You were just where he expected to find you, however. Your face was pressed into a pillow, and you had managed to curl yourself into as tight a ball as possible pressed to the far end of the couch. Your book lay open on the floor. Apparently you had fallen asleep before you had the chance to properly set it aside. 
The folio drew his gaze one last time, but there was no folio to see. Just his cloak. Boromir sat beside you on the couch and draped one arm lazily over the backrest. “I’m home.” The words washed over you and brought as much warmth as the blanket he pulled up over your shoulders. “I apologize for working this late,” he began, but a shake of your head cuts him off.
“You are forgiven, my love.” The words are mumbled and just as muffled by the pillow as your greeting. You opened your eyes, and found Boromir smiling down at you. His arm no longer rested upon the back of the couch. It migrated down to wrap around your shoulders. You couldn’t pinpoint when he moved it, though. Possibly when he covered you with the blanket. “Aragorn came to collect the notes from you - said he would write up the draft himself. He was
displeased
 you let the meeting drag on into the night. He threatened to go break up the meeting himself, but I told him you would die of apoplexy if you should fail to reach reach resolutions on every matter to be included in this quarter’s report. I think he left a note somewhere, but I cannot remember where. My book was good, and I was tired.” You gestured vaguely away from where you sat.  
Boromir laughed. A full and rich sound that drew you to him like a moth to a flame. You shifted to rest your head on his arm. “Of course he did.That is horribly like him, I’m afraid. His note, however, can wait until later. Right now, I am quite content to stay where I am at.”
“It is terribly like him, and it would have been right for him to do it - would you not have worried yourself sick about all that was left undone.” His arm wrapped further around you, drawing you further into his hold. 
“I may have welcomed the intervention this time. That infernal new Minister of War may well drive me out of my mind. Did you know he wants us to buy fifty, fifty, fully trained war horses? The Minister of Finance - you remember Celebdür? - nearly lost his mind. Poor man; I truly would not have blamed him for throttling him. The two of them bickered for ages. I eventually had to cut them off. I think I have a solution that will leave them both acceptably mollified.” Boromir broke off midway through his building rant and let out a deep breath. “That’s more than enough work. It took all of the evening; I will not let it take any more of our time.” 
You let out a small hum of acknowledgement. “You know I will always listen to you talk about work, but I agree it has occupied more than enough of your day - and night.” Boromir watched as you stretched and rolled so you could face him in full, which left you pressed into his chest. His arms tightened around you; his face pressed into your neck.
“Truly more than enough. By the time I cut those two off, More of my mind was back here with you than in that room.” His breath ruffled your hair, which tickled his nose. Your scent enveloped him, and the last of the day’s stress gave way. He could feel more than hear your answering giggle. 
When you tucked yourself fully into his hold, your position became a mirror image of when he lay his cloak over his folio - but with all your weight against him. You let out a contented sigh, he chuckled and pressed a kiss to the crown of your head, savoring the warmth of you against him. Boromir pulled you tighter against him and settled in to keep you right here in his arms for as long as you wanted to stay before the fire. 
Whenever anyone asked him about the long hours he keeps, the years he had given to this city and this realm, the blood, the sweat, the tears, he would answer it was his duty. It was undoubtedly that, but that was far from the full truth. Duty bound him to his service, yes, but this right here - holding you in his arms - gave that duty purpose. He savored every single second. It was only when he began to struggle to keep his eyes open, that he conceded defeat and carried you to bed.
The folio stayed beneath the cloak until the morning light broke through the bedroom window. Then he slipped out of bed, careful to not disturb you, and retrieved the packet of pages and his writing box. Just as he has done on many mornings, settles in with his work and pulls you back to his side to steal a few more minutes of peace before he has to surrender himself to the day ahead.
A/N: A writing box is basically a lap desk. I was obsessed with the mental image of Boromir working away while you were still snuggled into his side. A quick Google search said that apparently lap desks in various forms have existed since about the 1600s, so I decided that was close enough. Fun facts courtesy of Hannah.
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myteavsricochet · 10 months ago
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Latest fanfics read, part 6
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(Part. 1) (Part. 2) (Part. 3) (Part. 4) (Part 5)
I Keep My Mouth Shut Tight (Cause I Don't Want To Lose What's Not Even Mine)
"Being affectionate, he has always used certain pet names with me. He’s called me sweetheart since we met, and I have used several in turn. That night he used a new one... I realised that he had woken me, saying it was time to take another dose of medicine. It was the way he said it, though: “Baby, I need you to wake up for me...” I am only slightly ashamed to admit that I whined pathetically at him calling me that, but he seemed to take it as protest that I didn’t want to wake, and not for what it really was—me absolutely losing my mind over that word coming out of his mouth and being directed at me. The cherry on top of it all was when he kissed me on the forehead and my brain promptly stopped working completely."
OR: At hit wits end, Henry decides to turn to reddit to ask the internet if his roommate likes him back, or if he's going insane. Then Nora intervenes.
Additional tags: Social Media, Ask reddit, Cute, Short & Sweet, Silly, Sharing a bad, Didn't know they were dating, Cuddling & Snuggling
It's Not a Secret
Henry is a boring person.
This is an objective fact. It’s been such a constant in his life that it hardly bothers him. He prefers the mundane. Thrives under routine. Tolerates many things poorly: surprise parties, capsaicin, loud noises.
Another objective fact: Henry loves Alex. Alex is not boring at all.
Unfortunately, everyone else in Henry’s life seems to think that a bore like him is incapable of a relationship like theirs— and, more distressingly, that this must mean that Alex simply doesn’t exist.
Or: Five times that no one believed that Henry and Alex were an item, and one time that they all did.
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Director of Finance Henry Fox, tattoo artist alex claremont-diaz, Opposites Attract, Not actually a secret relationship, Misunderstandings, Developing Relationship, Sexual Content
in sickness and in health
Henry has a rather nasty cold, but June had her appendix removed, which means she wins. Because of her victory in the unwell olympics, Henry will stay in Texas while Alex flies to New York to visit his sister and the rest of their chosen family, something Henry desperately tries not to resent.
Additional tags: Slice of life, Sickfic, Married life
The Room Where It Happens
caged, Alex who he had never thought would be his, making himself at home, in a place Henry hasn’t thought of as home since his father died. It was simply a place he lived. His home was now sitting on the edge of the bed and pulling off his socks.
----
Or, a trio of firsts.
Additional Tags: Canon Compliant, Post-Canon, Pre-Canon, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, First Time Bottoming, Angst, But not like Alex/Henry angst, Lonely Henry angst, Praise Kink
the way it is suddenly there, total and complete
As Alex falls in love with David, Henry falls even more impossibly in love with him, and their little family.
Or: Over the first year of their new life together, Alex fully commits to being a dog dad. Henry is his captive audience.
When I Get Going
“On a scale of one to ten,” Henry says softly, stepping closer to him and lowering his voice in a way that has Alex’s pulse jumping in his throat, his entire body aching to respond, “how far gone are you right now? One being ‘I could easily hold a conversation with the Queen’ and ten being ‘I’m genuinely surprised nobody’s noticed yet’.” Alex grits his teeth, but even the reminder of Henry’s nefarious grandmother can’t quell the arousal burning hotly in his stomach.
“Six,” he hisses, embarrassed and turned on, every molecule of him straining to reach out and pull Henry into something that will start off as a kiss, and end as anything but.
“Let me know when you get to eight,” Henry says firmly, then he just-
Additional Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, PWP, Underwear, Coming In Pants, Orgasm Delay/Denial, delayed gratification, Control, Light Dom/sub, Dom/sub Undertones, Begging, Praise Kink, Henry is a fucking tease
crushed velvet
"In this brief moment of reprieve, Henry pants for breath, digging his fingers into the red material of the sofa to remind himself that this is, in fact, somehow real."
Or, movieverse couch blowjob missing scene.
Additional Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Ficlet, Missing Scene, Blow Jobs, Skull Fucking, Simultaneous Orgasm, Coming In Pants
Comfort in the Backlight
For the prompt: "rainy day in the brownstone, fluff?"
Maybe sneakers weren’t the best choice of shoe for the day, Alex realizes as he shuts the front door behind him and grimaces at the quick puddle forming beneath him.
you are my medicine (when you're close to me)
After one last peck, Henry finally pulls away, leaving a sore spot of hollowness where his touch had filled it before. Alex forces his face to stay even– he doesn’t want his boyfriend to feel guilty for doing what he needs to do, doesn’t want to feed into the assumption that Alex is helpless without him.
Doesn’t want to be another obligation in Henry’s life that will one day grow to be too much to shoulder.
When the door falls shut, leaving Alex alone with a house that is much too empty and silent without his family there, there’s a lump in his throat that he can’t quite swallow. He thinks of Nora, making jokes that Henry is a saint for putting up with him during exam season; he thinks of June who uprooted her entire life to take care of him during college– and finally, he thinks of Henry, gentle and perfect Henry, that has had to worry about others way too much in his life– and a stinging sense of dread settles over him.
-
Or, Alex's no good horrible very bad two weeks without Henry.
Additional Tags: Alex Claremont-Diaz Has ADHD, Alex Claremont-Diaz Has Abandonment Issues, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Panic Attacks, Alex Claremont-Diaz Needs a Hug, Long-Distance Relationship, Mental Health Issues, Established Relationship
Smile, You're on Camera
"Baby," Alex manages, and Henry groans in response, grazing his earlobe with his teeth. Alex bites his lip his stifle his own whimper. "H, hang on."
Henry pulls away from his assault on his neck, face flushed, chest heaving. "What's — what's wrong?"
"Nothing, sweetheart, nothing," Alex soothes, placing both hands on Henry's shoulders. "I just — do you wanna do it? Now?"
Henry blinks owlishly. Alex watches as the realization slowly dawns on him, and he turns his head to look at the camera. He stares for a moment, then looks back at Alex and says, "Can you bring it closer?"
Or, Alex and Henry film a sex tape.
Additional Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sex Tapes, Explicit Sexual Content, Blow Jobs, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Crying During Sex, in a sexy way not a sad way, Switching, Sub Top Alex
no bunny compares to you
Henry is a lot of things as a person and while much of his personality transfers over to his bunny form, his physical attributes do not. Most notably, his size.
Where Alex’s boyfriend stands tall and regal, his furry counterpart is small and fluffy, unable to summit even the most minor of obstacles.
Take their sofa, for one. Alex is watching TV and minding his own business, when he hears a steady thump from just below him. Peering over the edge of the dark cushion, he spots his boyfriend angrily pounding his back foot against the carpet.
“Ha! Is my little bun too tiny to get up here on his own?” Alex teases. He’s promptly rewarded with a whisker twitch followed by a nose scrunch. Henry is pouting and it’s the most adorable thing he’s ever witnessed.
--
or, five times Henry shapeshifts for himself and one time he does it for Alex
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Magical Realism, 5+1 Things, Bunny Henry, Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Shapeshifting, Idiots in Love, Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor Needs a Hug, Protective Alex Claremont-Diaz, Soft Boys, Henry Has Bad Days
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flexfactory · 5 months ago
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WAGING THE WAR ON AGING: Fitness Over 40
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For most of us over 40, the inevitable and unavoidable realities of aging have already begun to make themselves known in a variety of ways. Random aches and pains, the formation of wrinkles here and there, those weird, super-long eyebrow hairs that seemingly sprout out of nowhere, all part of the “I’m Getting Older” starter pack. For many, these changes symbolize the end of an old era as it transitions into a newer, scarier era. An era where the realities of life and one’s own mortality begin to become more prominent thoughts in our everyday lives. An era where it becomes increasingly more evident that every decision we make as it pertains to our health, finances, romantic lives, and family, will inevitably affect our future lives, either in a beneficial or adverse way. Suddenly, the freedom of being able to “throw caution to the wind” no longer has a place in our important decision making. The “Over 40” crowd have a lot of changes to deal with, but it doesn’t have to be a super complicated process.
Though there is nothing wrong with utilizing fitness to achieve a fit and healthy body for the sake of vanity (looking good is one of the many perks of being in great shape), fitness over 40 can be used as a veritable anti-aging tool. With the right balance of healthy exercise and mindful eye on nutrition, one can extend their quality of life and comfortable physical existence well into their later years.
“Am I too old for any positive changes to make a difference? How old is too old?” Legitimate questions, indeed.
The reality, is that the hands of time never stop ticking. After 30, we begin to lose 3% to 8% of our muscle mass per decade (the most inactive people tend to lose more muscle than active folk). Once we reach 60, the rate of muscle loss naturally increases and generally happens at a much faster pace. This is a condition called sarcopenia, the age-related progressive loss of muscle mass and strength. While we can’t stop Father Time in his tracks, exercise is certainly a way of grabbing the old man by the beard and slowing him down significantly. There’s no such thing as TOO old to begin a fitness journey, but because we’ll never be younger again than we are today, it would be advantageous to get started on a path towards a healthy, fit life sooner than later.
No matter our age in earthly years, whether it be 40 or 140, exercise can change overall health and longevity in miraculous ways. Being just a little more active today than you were yesterday and doing that consistently can have a profound effect on the trajectory of your future health.
Let’s take a look at some of the key components to being fit over 40:
STRENGTH TRAINING
Strength training helps counteract the effects of sarcopenia and significantly slows progressive muscle loss associated with the condition. Incorporating weight lifting, resistance band training, and bodyweight exercises can be tremendously beneficial.
CARDIOVASCULAR EXERCISE
Cardiovascular health is crucial for reducing the risk of heart disease, which becomes more prevalent with age. Activities such as brisk walking, jogging, cycling, and swimming can vastly improve heart health and endurance.
FLEXIBILITY AND BALANCE
Flexibility and balance exercises help to prevent injuries and overall health. Yoga, Pilates, and stretching routines are excellent for ensuring we remain flexible and mobile.
CONSISTENCY AND MODERATION
Consistency is the key to any fitness regimen. It’s important to find a routine that fits into your lifestyle and can be maintained long-term. Moderation is also crucial to avoid overtraining and injuries.
Though the notion that you “have to change the way you train when you get older” is often repeated, this is absolutely not the case, you do not have to change the way you train as you age. The principals of resistance training remain exactly the same no matter how old you are. The thing that does change while training in your later years is that you must be more conscientious when mitigating risks while lifting. You can’t get away with overloading the bar and swinging weight around recklessly like you did when you were 20. The risk of injury does increase with age, so proper form and loading is paramount for lifting. That said, your training doesn’t have to be overhauled just because you’ve hit middle age or older.
So, we know that there isn’t an age limit or expiry date on being fit and healthy, and we know some of the main components for utilizing fitness to add health and longevity to your life, but what are some the benefits to getting fit and staying fit after 40?
Let’s go through a few:
IMPROVED PHYSICAL HEALTH
Regular exercise reduces the risk of chronic issues like hypertension, high blood pressure, and diabetes, and reduces the risk of osteoporosis by improving bone density.
MENTAL WELL-BEING
Exercise has been shown to improve mood, enhance cognitive function, and reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety. Staying active can lead to a better quality of life and increased longevity.
ENHANCE MOBILITY AND INDEPENDENCE
Maintaining strength, balance, and flexibility helps older adults stay mobile and independent, reducing the risk of falls and other related injuries.
The list of positive benefits that come from being fit after 40 is obviously much larger than the handful that were listed, and to top it off, the downsides are few. One doesn’t have to LIVE in the gym to be fit and healthy. As little as 150 minutes of moderate exercise per week is enough to make notable changes in your life. For those that are about to say “I just don’t have the time”, that’s only 1.5 hours out of a 168 hour week! Almost anyone can find an hour and a half per week to spare, and for that little amount of time, the reward outweighs the sacrifice by a metric ton.
Everyone deserves a long, comfortable, and happy life, and your loved ones deserve to have you around for as long as possible. We all want to win the war on aging, so It is our responsibility to ensure that, as we get older, we start living life more “strategically”, and there is no better strategy than focusing on your fitness and health.
Lift hard, lift often, eat well, and enjoy life!
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forget-you-morelike-fuck-you · 2 years ago
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Heartwork- E.M. Pt. 1
Hi everyone! Let me start by saying that I am sorry for not being around in a while. Life and stuff, you know? I won't bore you with the details, but long story short, I've found some inspiration again and wanted to finish this fic I was requested. I really hope it's been worth the wait!
2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - Epilogue
Masterlist
You and Eddie meet again after several years apart.
TW- cursing, brief mentions nudity, drinking, mentions of smoking (lmk if I missed anything!)
Pairings- Eddie x Reader
Word Count- 1,779
(Gif not mine, credit to owner!)
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You always liked Eddie. Not in the googly-eyed, heart-racing, butterflies-in-the-stomach way, but you used to be really great friends, especially when you hung out with him and your best friend pretty much every day in high school when they were together. You remember all the times the three of you sat on Eddie’s couch in the middle of the night, laughing and smoking together while a movie played in the background, just mood music for the three of you to talk about anything and everything until you fell asleep. 
You honestly loved seeing Eddie and your bestie being all lovey-dovey to each other. You’d always give a little smile when you caught them in a tender moment, kissing each other sweetly, holding hands, brushing a piece of hair from each other’s faces
 You envied her. You didn’t want Eddie, necessarily, but you did hope you’d find someone that treated you the way he treated her. 
You stopped talking to them a while after you left for college. Not out of malice or any sort of fall-out among the three of you, but things just got busy. You were working on a degree, after all, and that takes a lot of focus.  
You let your bags fall next to you as you walk into your new apartment in the heart of Hawkins. You never knew if you’d come back after you graduated, but in all honesty, after a lot of looking and a lot of thought, you realized you wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. So, you found a well-paying job at the bank as a junior finance advisor and tried to settle back into the place you’d always called home. 
You decide to go out and celebrate at the Hideout, and you smile gently as you walk in for the first time in years, remembering that Eddie’s band used to play here. Maybe they still do. You find a seat at the bar and order some food and a stiff drink, thankful that the bar’s within walking distance of your apartment. You thank the bartender as she sets your drink down in front of you and take a sip, letting yourself look around.  
It hasn’t changed a bit. Faded red-painted walls stained with cigarette smoke, a rickety oak stage, heavy velvet curtains flanking each side. So many nights spent here dancing with your best friend, whooping and cheering for Eddie and his band, black sharpie Xs on the back of your hands. You smile at the memory, lost in it as you suddenly ache for that friendship again, when you hear your name being called. 
“Y/N?” You recognize that voice. You turn your head to the door to spot a tall man, shaggy mess of curls still intact, sporting a jean vest and a tattered band shirt. You set your drink down and stand, smiling ear to ear. 
“Eddie?!” You both laugh as you approach each other and pull each other in, you squeezing his middle as his arms wrap around your shoulders. You part and sigh happily, taking him in. “You look exactly the same!” He laughs. 
“And you look
 completely different! What are you doing here? I thought you were in Chicago at that fancy school?” He places his hands on his hips, his smile intoxicating, like it always was.  
You shrug, hands going to your pockets. “I just graduated a couple months ago. I thought about staying there, but it’s not home, ya know?”  
“Yeah, I get it. Wasn’t the same without you, though.” You wave a hand dismissively.  
“I bet you didn’t even realize I was gone, what with you and Y/BFF/N too busy ogling at each other every second. How is she, by the way?” You watch as his eyes go from joy to something darker, sadder, and you regret asking. 
“Eh, it didn’t work out. She actually moved not long ago. Down south, near the river, I think.” You shuffle your feet, eyes flicking down. 
“Oh. I’m sorry, Eds, I didn’t—” Eddie waves a hand, his smile returning. 
“Don’t worry about it. It was a long time ago now.” It goes quiet, and tension builds. Then, the bartender sets your plate of loaded potato skins down next to your drink, and you try to smile again. 
“Wanna sit? I got some food, if you wanna share,” You offer. Eddie’s smile returns too as he nods, and you and he sit, trying to get the momentum going again as Eddie orders a drink.  
“So, you still play with the band?” You gesture to the stage. Eddie chuckles, shaking his head. 
“No, not anymore. We all got jobs and shit now. Assimilating into society, as it were. Gareth’s engaged, that’s fucking weird.” You both laugh at that, “I don’t know, it’s just crazy to think about. We used to be freaks. Remember when people called us Satanists and stuff? Thought Hellfire was a cult? Now we’re just average fucking chumps with Social Security accounts and shit.” You raise your eyebrows, nodding at the insanity of it all.  
“Seems just yesterday we were running around the park after dark, passing around a joint and pushing each other on the swings.”  
“Yeah! I remember that. Good times
” He flicks his eyes up, remembering. “I remember once, we were in Y/BBF/N’s pool, and you forgot your swimsuit
” He laughs, and you suddenly remember, and your hands fly to your face, embarrassed laughs spilling out of your mouth. 
“Stop! I don’t need to relive that!” You grimace at the memory. Your best friend’s swimsuit didn’t fit, so you opted to just swim in your underwear. What’s the difference, really, anyway? Well, turns out swimsuits are easier to keep on underwater, and your panties slipped down your ass as you climbed the ladder. You’re lucky it was just the two of them, but both Eddie and your best friend called you “Full-Moon” for a month! 
“No, no! You looked good! Flaunt what you got and all.” You feel heat rush to your cheeks as you both laugh uncomfortably.  
“Yeah, just like that time your pants split right down the middle, and somebody was going commando that day!” You retort.  
“Oh, fuck! I completely forgot about that! What were we doing?” Eddie laughs, his brows furrowed in thought as he takes a bite of potato. 
“Um,” You rack your brain. “Oh, we were
 We were at the apple orchard! You tried to lift Y/BFF/N on your shoulders so she could pick the one she wanted!” Recognition streaks across his face as he laughs. 
“Yeah, that’s right! God, and I had to waddle back to the van with both of your jackets around my waist so no one would see!”  
“Right! God, that was a great day
” You muse, the laughter subsiding.  
You continue reminiscing all through the night, not parting until the bar closes at 1 A.M. You wrap Eddie in a tight hug as the bartender closes the door behind you, locking it and turning the light off. When you pull away, you sigh. “I’m so glad I ran into you, Ed.” Your cheeks burn from smiling so much. You don’t remember the last time you smiled this much, but you bet it was the last time you were here with him. He nods, his hands going to his pockets.  
“Yeah, me too. But hey, now that you’re back permanently, we can hang out again. Just like old times.”  
“I’d like that. Um, here’s my new number
” You rummage through your purse to find your new business cards you just had made and hand him one. “My personal number is on there, so just give me a shout whenever.” He raises his eyebrows at the card, handling it like it’s a precious photo he doesn’t want smudged. 
“Wow! Impressive! Was this whole night just a ploy for me to
” He reads the card, squinting in the darkness. “Seek financial advice?” You both laugh. 
“Obviously! I just need to reel in new clients so I’m stalking old friends. You caught me!” You raise your hands up as your face feigns guilt. 
“Well, I don’t make enough money to have any left over for warranting advice, but you’ll be the first to know if I do!” He promises. You nod gratefully. “Well, anyway, where’s your car? I’ll walk you.” You thumb in the direction behind you toward your apartment building. 
“I actually walked. I just live a couple blocks away.”  
“I can give you a ride. I’m parked right there.” He points to a black sedan, definitely an upgrade from the van he drove when you were all in high school. You smile lightly and nod.  
“I’d appreciate that, thanks.”  
You walk to his car and get in, looking around a bit as Eddie hops in the driver's side. On the dashboard you see a picture, yellowed with time. You pick it up, holding the edges gently, though one side is torn, and see you and Eddie smiling in front of a stage, the Hideout stage, actually. It’s a photo from Corroded Coffin’s first gig there. The ripped edge is right where your best friend’s arm is linked with Eddie’s. You let out a little gasp. 
“You still have this? I think I lost most of my photos when I moved to college. Though, they might be boxed up somewhere in my parents’ attic.” Eddie looks down with a tentative smile as he starts the ignition. 
“Yeah
 after things ended with Y/BFF/N, I got rid of a lot of stuff with her in it, but I couldn’t bring myself to get rid of this one. So, I just modified it a bit.” You feel sad bringing Y/BFF/N up, but you can’t help but ask. 
“Was it bad?” Eddie scoffs, flicking his eyes to the window. 
“Yeah.” That’s all he has to say, and so you leave it there, not wanting to push him. You direct Eddie to your building and lean over the center console to hug him before getting out.  
“Thanks for the ride, Ed.” 
“No problem. I’ll call you soon, okay? Now that you’re back, I’m not letting you go again, got it?” You feel your heart jump unexpectedly at that, but you nod. 
“Got it. I’ll talk to you soon. Goodnight!” 
“Goodnight, Y/N.” You close the door behind you and wave as he drives away before turning and walking into the building and up to your apartment. As you close the door, you smile, remembering everything, and you realize that this is the happiest you’ve felt in a long time. As you get ready for bed, you can’t help but hope that Eddie will call sooner rather than later. 
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farmerbebop · 8 months ago
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No one asked for an update on my holiday but here we go.
1. I dreamed of having a drink with Nina Simone (it’s more like she gave me one actually).
2. Mom insisted that she had to pluck out some of my white hair and I told her there’s absolutely no use because they will grow back and she said the new ones will be different than these so that can’t stop her from dealing with these first. So I accepted my fate because you can’t possibly win against a South East Asian mom who knows exactly how much white hair you had the last time you saw her.
3. I was lamenting my hair loss in silence when mom started talking every night about the miseries of every working class woman she has ever known including herself. If last holiday I heard someone was borrowing money to live then this holiday I’m told she also has to borrow money for her father’s funeral. Only one thing never changes: My mom’s lament on how the retirement age only gets higher and her body is only going to ache more. Now I think all my white hair has grown back tenfold.
4. Dad admitted to eating a lot of ice cream lately and A WHOLE JACKFRUIT the other day. He was trying to explain his blood test result (high blood sugar it says). And just a few months ago he told me that my stepmom didn’t let him eat ice cream because he had too much sugar already. He got his heels operated lately (there are still a lot of things on his arms and legs that need to be operated) and is too scared to look at the wounds but still joked “I will walk just like a ballet dancer.” Apparently, I take after him but without the humor.
5. It turns out warm climate and kind people aren’t the only things we have in common with Southern Europeans. They also pick babies up and kiss them on their bare bellies. Grandmas also put grandchildren’s photos under glass table tops and sit outside their house looking at people. One grandma told me the bus was coming in 10 minutes without using English. She was correct. She probably knew I can’t find that information in their bus app co-financed by the EU. Or maybe I just looked very confused at the bus stop because beside the lack of time schedule, the bus app also says “(NO RETURN)” for the bus I was trying to take. Spoiler: I managed to return somehow on the same bus despite the bus stops not being on google maps and finding my way back has never been my biggest strength.
6. The frustration about politics is universal. The tour guide complained about three generations of politicians who went to the same elite schools and never listened to a normal person in their lives, the financial crisis, the Euro (the people weren’t even asked if they wanted it), the Americans (who wanted to build cable car to the holiest church on the mountain, where generations of pilgrims have slept in the yard under a million of stars, praying for miracles), the five stars hotel (they charge over 200 Euro for a seat on the beach since the hotel was built, the local people used to swim from that beach to the small church nearby, now hotel security can catch them for trespassing on the beach).
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faith-in-democracy · 3 months ago
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Corporations Don’t Bleed, But They’re Stealing Your Voice
A corporation will never cry at a funeral. It will never bleed, breathe, or ache for justice. Yet, thanks to a broken system, corporations have more rights than you do. And they’re using them to drown out your voice.
When the Supreme Court decided that corporations are people, it handed the richest entities in the world a megaphone. While you get one vote, a billionaire CEO gets thousands by pumping millions of dollars into political campaigns. That’s not democracy. That’s auctioning power to the highest bidder.
The result? Politicians don’t answer to you—they answer to corporations. Laws are written for oil companies, not the planet. Tax breaks favor tech giants, not small businesses. Healthcare? Education? Worker rights? They’re sacrificed on the altar of corporate profit.
Here’s the truth: this isn’t some accident. It’s a carefully crafted system designed to keep the wealthy in charge. And unless we stop it, it will get worse.
But you can fight back.
First, demand better laws. Push for constitutional amendments that say money is not speech and corporations are not people. It’s a heavy lift, but movements like Move to Amend are already leading the charge. Support them.
Second, vote smarter. Research candidates who reject corporate donations. Back grassroots campaigns. Support public financing of elections. You can’t outspend billionaires, but you can outnumber them.
Finally, stay loud. Write to your representatives. Organize locally. Talk about this with your friends and neighbors. Power grows when people care enough to act.
Corporations don’t bleed. They don’t vote. They don’t dream about a better future. But you do. And it’s time to take your voice back.
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wvffles · 22 days ago
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ohhhhhhhhh goshhh đŸ˜© the anticipation continuessss
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“And I had an angel standing over me,” he added, his eyes growing heavy. Guilty. “A bona fide angel. She’d stitched me up, she told me. She also told me I was lucky to be alive. The doc wanted to toe tag me and be done with it, but she thought I still had some fight left in me.” “She was my anchor,” he said. “After it was all said and done, she followed me here, held my feet down to the ground. Sometimes she had to hammer me down, ya know.”
the fact that this is how he sees their story, yet he's still chosen to be a dirty lying no good scoundrel really grinds my gears. like he needed to forget his name? I could smack him with a frying pan rapunzel style for the same effect lol
“I’m the guy who can’t die,” he muttered.
my immediate thought was well try harder 😭 and i did feel bad for a second, then I finished the chapter
i stand by my statement 😅
You marveled that you could smile at all, but it was only thanks to Dean Winchester.
so real lmaoo
her inner conflict tugged at my heartstrings, i'm just glad she's giving herself some grace at least <3 it’s a difficult situation all around
the flowers!!! đŸ˜© oh dean :( and michael is truly a classic douche like sir you cannot just magically make it better with some flowers and dinner đŸ™‚â€â†”ïžđŸ€šđŸœ
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Each position captured was more compromising than the next between Michael and Dolores Daye. Apparently, he was paying most of her bills as well with your combined household funds. So part of your own money was financing his exploits.
i would get so violent are you kiddingg meeeee
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it’s bad enough he’s sleeping with a floozy on the regular but to take his wife’s money as well to fund that is actually beyond ballsy and insane. i hate them, justice for my girl fr đŸ«¶đŸœ:(
Dean nodded, taking a deep breath. “That’s good
but, I need to head home for a little while.”
ngl I had to put my phone down for a moment and yell into a pillow because dean, what the hell man đŸ˜©
“Really. When did you figure that one out, in the whole week you’ve known me?” he asked. It was harsher than he meant to be, but he couldn’t help the words that were spilling out of his mouth. “Didn’t that get you in trouble the first time? I’d a thought you would’ve learned your lesson by now.”
oh dean, getting stabbed would’ve probably hurt less
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He pulled you back into him, but you looked away from his imploring gaze. Your breaths grew shallow while you tried in vain to stop yourself from crying. It damn well broke his heart.
mine’s breaking too dean 😔 i’m just glad he’s trying to ‘fix it’ somewhat immediately instead of just letting her leave like that.
Except that you realized
this was goodbye. So you took advantage of every second of it.
yeah my heart is definitely broken đŸ„ș i’m glad they didn’t end things off with hostility and got to have that bittersweet moment at least 😔
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Sam stared back at him, still with that frown. His guilt and reluctance to see Dean go was reflected in his eyes; those sad puppy dog eyes that used to get him out of almost any punishment with their parents when the boys were young. Before.
oh they’d work on me for sure 😭
Before Dean could get into the cab, Sam stopped him. Their gazes met, but in that moment, no words were needed.
They pulled one another into a firm hug.


Afterwards, Sam watched the yellow cab take his brother away to the train station, feeling a weight in his heart that wouldn’t subside.
He would never know that Dean felt exactly the same way. Except that impossible weight felt a lot like your hand, gently laid over his heart.
my heart aches, this chapter was so sad đŸ˜© (not in a bad way!!đŸ«¶đŸœ) I feel for all three of them đŸ˜”đŸ€
“I just took a closer look at Milligan’s finances,” he said. “Before you go, there’s something you might want to know.”
ahhhhhh the cliffhanger! i’m guessing he found something illegal and/or dangerous đŸ€” the preview is making me anxiousss, he better not hurt her! đŸ˜©
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this was a wonderful chapter, very excited to see the drama unfold!!💗💗
BETWEEN THE CITY & THE STARS - Part 4
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Summary: In the fall of 1945, Dean is having a difficult time assimilating back into civilian life after the War. He’s visiting his brother Sam in New York City, where he’s beginning to build up his law firm. At two minutes to closing time, you interrupt their evening to solicit a solicitor. Your request? You need help in order to divorce your husband.
AN: Now we get into the aftermath of the night before, with all the insecurity and heartbreak to go along with it. 💙
Jacklesverse Bingo24 Prompt: Historical Epic
Song Inspo: “Danke Shoen” by Wayne Newton
Word Count: 4K
Tags/Warnings: Mentions of cheating, angsty angst, trauma/PTSD, and a cliffhanger

✹ Series Masterlist
đŸŽ”Â YouTube Playlist || Spotify Playlist
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Part 4: Complicit
Sam would give Michael one thing. The guy damn well knew how to drink.
He didn’t stop all night, throwing back whiskey like it was cheap beer. His words began to slur, his movements sloppy, but he was still coherent. When he got up to visit the men’s restroom, Sam got up as well. Maybe he could get Michael talking.
Sam stopped the other man from tripping into the urinal. The two laughed it off, with Michael thanking him before he unzipped to finish his business. Sam did the same.
After washing their hands, Sam looked over and noticed Michael’s gaze lingering on his own reflection in the mirror. It was becoming a rough sight—his blonde hair no longer neatly coiffed, purplish rings under his eyes, the stench of alcohol clinging to his skin and clothing.
“You all right there, Milligan?” Sam asked.
Michael ran a hand over his face, sighing when it didn’t get any better.
“Fine,” he replied. “So, Winchester. What did you say you do for work again? Something about your own business?”
Sam nodded. “I started up a law firm.”
That much, he had to be honest about. It was all too easy for someone to look up his name in the directory.
“Sounds like a good outfit,” Michael said, with an incline of his head. “Every lawyer I know wears a Rolex.”
Sam chuckled, glancing down at his father’s watch. “Well, I’m not quite there yet.”
“Someday soon, I’m sure,” said Michael. He bumped Sam conspiringly on the shoulder.
“And you?” Sam asked. “What’s keeping the lights on at your place?”
Michael raised a hand to sort through his unruly hair, a dirtier blonde in this unflattering light.
“Well, you could say I’ve inherited a business of my own,” he said. “I run a meat packing plant down in the district.”
Sam’s attention piqued. There had been a meat rationing during the war, even some rumors and propaganda about “meatleggers,” black market operators.
“How’s it been with the rations?” Sam asked. “Been hard to even find a good carton of eggs lately.”
Michael gave him a slight smile. “Been on the turnaround, actually. I’ve been able to make some connections with vendors outside the city. A little grease on the palms makes a little go a long way, if you catch my drift.”
Sam slowly smiled and nodded. A little grease on the palms, huh?
“Do what you gotta do in the times, ‘s what I say,” Sam agreed.
Michael snorted. “Now you’re talkin’. That’s all we can do, you know. Try to make a thing work, with whatever scraps we get. Try to stay afloat.”
“Try to stay alive,” Sam rejoined.
Michael made a low sound of approval. He became more contemplative, crossing his arms as he once again glanced at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. Sam’s gaze on the other man was perceptive, gaining ever closer to what seemed to be eating at the very core of him. Whether Sam actually believed what he was saying or not, each of his words was a test, a subtle nudge.
“You know,” Michael said. “I was shot down in France.”
Sam sobered further. Leaning against the counter, he retrieved two cigarettes and a lighter. He didn’t often smoke, but he thought it might keep the other man talking. He handed one over to Michael, and he took it gratefully. They lit up together and coiled musky tobacco smoke into the air.
“Where?” Sam asked.
Michael snorted, huffing a bit of smoke. “Lord knows. But when I woke up, I had stitches from here to here.”
He gestured to the back of his head, all the way to above his brow. It explained a small, but noticeable scar near his temple.
“And I had an angel standing over me,” he added, his eyes growing heavy. Guilty. “A bona fide angel. She’d stitched me up, she told me. She also told me I was lucky to be alive. The doc wanted to toe tag me and be done with it, but she thought I still had some fight left in me.”
Michael shook his head. “The next chance I got, I married her.”
Sam’s brows rose. He knew you had been a nurse, but he hadn’t known this part of your story.
“A wartime romance, huh?” he said. Michael quirked a smile.
“She was my anchor,” he said. “After it was all said and done, she followed me here, held my feet down to the ground. Sometimes she had to hammer me down, ya know.”
He hesitated, his eyes somewhat glazing over. He stared over Sam’s shoulder at something only he could see.
“But sometimes
sometimes an anchor just feels suffocating,” he said. “Sometimes, you need to forget your own damn name. Forget that your entire life and mortgage is in a warehouse that might as well be a freezer full a’ dead cow meat. And still, it smells a hell of a lot better than lying on a dirty cot—where the last guy who had your spot probably got his leg sawed off.” 
Michael considers the cigarette in his hand for a long while before he takes another puff.
Sam exhales smoke as well. He spent the last three years behind a desk, but he sees the same shaken core in Michael Milligan that he too often sees in his older brother.
“You know, Winchester, there’s two kinds of men,” Michael said, just a hint of a slur in his voice. “The ones who pray to live
and the ones who beg for it to be over.”
“And what kind of man are you now?” Sam asked. His tone was loose, but his gaze was sharp.
Michael snorted. He dabbed the butt of his cigarette on the inside of the sink before he threw it away.
“I’m the guy who can’t die,” he muttered.
He rolled his shoulders, as if to let the weight of his words and everything that came along with them to roll off his back. Then he pushed his way out of the bathroom, leaving Sam considering more than just half a cigarette.
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That night after Dean left, you slept in the guest room instead of your bed. You couldn’t even bring yourself to sleep next to Michael when he stumbled in at four in the morning, especially now that you had seen his game with your own eyes. 
However, you also felt complicit yourself the next morning. You felt
ashamed. You took your vows seriously. You had never in your life thought you would be someone so brazen. You never thought you would dishonor your husband as well as yourself.
And yet. All while you got ready for work, hearing Michael’s snores from the other room, your mind was filled with warmth and memory—of Dean. His smile, his voice, his eyes, his lips, and of course, his hands. You couldn’t decide which of them was your favorite, but his hands were high on the list. 
You shouldn’t have let him in, you reminded yourself. You nibbled on your lower lip while you prepped the coffee maker. You should have told him goodnight at the door and saw him off. You should very well not have invited him up to the apartment, let alone drank with him, or let him touch you

You paused while the sound of percolation and the smell of fresh coffee filled the kitchen. You looked up at yourself in the small mirror that hung on the wall. The woman looking back at you was conflicted at best.
Yes, you felt guilty. But at the same time, you didn’t. Was it really betraying your marriage if your husband had been doing far worse, and for God knew how long?
No. This wasn’t a marriage. This was a sham. A mockery of the very thing.
You frowned angrily and almost slammed the carafe on the counter when the coffee was done. Forcing yourself to take a few steadying breaths, you allowed that hate and anger to slowly drain out of you, and you smiled.
You marveled that you could smile at all, but it was only thanks to Dean Winchester.
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What the hell am I doing?
Dean stared at the two bouquets of flowers. One was a bound bunch of red roses, the other was wildflowers and other colorful ones he didn’t know the names of. He was having a hard time deciding, namely because he didn’t know what kind of flowers you liked.
Because after all, he barely knew you.
He sighed down at the roses. They were pretty, but expensive. He could imagine your surprise, followed by your smile—the one that actually lit up your eyes and changed your whole face, made you sweeter, almost shy.
I’m buying flowers for a married woman.
The thought managed to make him pause, with a rough exhale of breath. The truth was, he’d crossed the line with you. More than once.
The hard part about it was, he didn’t really care. He did wonder if you cared.
He wondered if you’d be embarrassed to see him again. He wondered if you wanted to keep last night a memory, and nothing more. He wondered if he was better off booking his train home now, and leaving some kind of note for you with Sam. Dean didn’t think he wanted to see that look of mortification on your face, the whiskey finally cleared from your mind to see what he really was: a man with no job, no commitments, and very little prospects on the horizon.
“Ah, ‘scuse me,” a young man said from Dean’s left side.
“Oh, sorry,” Dean said, making way for the guy. He wasn’t quite as tall as Dean, lithe, blonde, and blue-eyed. He grabbed an arrangement of blue and yellow iris flowers from the case and took it up to the front. The florist seemed to recognize him.
“Oh, Michael! Been a while since I’ve seen you,” he said.
When the florist asked about you as well, the mention of your name rang between Dean’s ears. A feeling like inky claws raked through his chest; he raised his head from the roses and finally recognized Michael Milligan. He was the same man Dean had spotted in your wedding pictures hanging on the wall last night, right in the foyer.
“She’s all right,” Michael chuckled. “Truth be told, I’ve been working late this week. Hoping to surprise her tonight, take her out to dinner. Somewhere nice, you know.” 
“Oh, really? Why don’t you take her to that nice steakhouse off of Broadway
” the florist twittered on as he continued to ring up Michael’s order.
Anger and disgust prickled under Dean’s skin, his fists clenched at his sides. More than anything, he wanted to turn around and lay your husband out flat. If he thought one little bouquet and a Salisbury steak was going to wash him clean, then he was an idiot as well as a selfish bastard.
But Dean knew, deep down, that Michael would be just as justified to throw a swing right back at him.
So Dean left the flowers, the flower shop, and the entire busy street and all its blaring sounds behind.
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During your lunch break, you quickly made the trek over to Sam’s office. He’d called you this morning with a story that only confirmed everything you’d inherently felt, and yet, some of it still managed to shock you. 
You didn’t even have the patience to wait until after work, but when you got there, he reassured you. It had taken him a few rounds of poker and discreetly following Michael and Dolores after they exited through the back of the club
but Sam had gotten the evidence not long after. They weren’t exactly discreet in the alley. Or in the nearby motel.
You had the envelope in hand filled with the pictures he’d developed from his camera.  
“You don’t have to look,” he advised. “I wouldn’t recommend it.”
“No, I want to see it,” you said. You took the pictures out, and your expression didn’t change as you look through them all. Each position captured was more compromising than the next between Michael and Dolores Daye. Apparently, he was paying most of her bills as well with your combined household funds. So part of your own money was financing his exploits.
“I’m sorry,” Sam said. He was sincere, with those hazel eyes of his.
You nodded and gave him back the envelope. “What’s next?”
“I went ahead and filed the petition. I’ll take this right to the clerk’s office myself.”
“How long will it take to be over?”
“As long as Michael plays along, should be quick. A few months at most, after he’s served the divorce papers and signs them,” Sam assured.
A few months? That wasn’t quick enough in your book, but you agreed with a nod. You got up from the chair opposite his desk. You hesitated there.
“Oh, I meant to ask
how’s your brother?” you said.
Sam began to smile, but he tempered it. “He just called before you came in. He let me know he was stepping out for a walk.”
“Oh, really? Did he happen to say where?”
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You not only found Dean in Central Park, but close to the very same bench you two had sat on yesterday and talked the night away. He was surprised, but he smiled when he saw you. Your pace quickened, until you were hastening over to him. He welcomed you into his arms. He bent his head towards yours, stopping just shy of kissing you. Instead, he pressed his forehead to yours for a moment.
“Well, look who’s here?” he teased. “How’d you find me?”
“I stopped by Sam’s office,” you said, holding onto the lapels of his coat. A cold November wind pushed at you both, ruffling your clothes. “The paperwork is on its way. Soon enough, I won’t be a married woman anymore.”
He tucked a wild strand of hair behind your ear and smiled, but it didn’t altogether reach his eyes.
“How soon is soon?” he asked.
“A few months, according to your brother.”
Dean nodded, taking a deep breath. “That’s good
but, I need to head home for a little while.”
That made you pause, tilting your head in confusion. Though you supposed it made sense. He was only here visiting his brother. He was planning on going home eventually.
But surely, that was before we
 You lowered your gaze.
“Back to Lawrence?” you asked. Again, he nodded.
“I need to take care of some things, figure out my next move,” he said.
You pulled away from him to brace yourself, and not just against the cold. “Well, when will you be back?” 
He stayed quiet, worrying you even more. There was a deep pit forming in your stomach, churning with unease.  
“Dean?” you prodded.
He stepped back in to grasp your arms gently.
“Sweetheart
the truth is, I don’t have much to offer you,” he said. “I don’t have a business to inherit from my folks. I don’t even have a job. I’m a man who was about as useful as a jackhammer, until the war ended.”
You frowned, resting a hand against his chest. “Dean Winchester, that’s not all there is to you.”
“Really. When did you figure that one out, in the whole week you’ve known me?” he asked. It was harsher than he meant to be, but he couldn’t help the words that were spilling out of his mouth. “Didn’t that get you in trouble the first time? I’d a thought you would’ve learned your lesson by now.”
You snatched your hand back, hurt filling your eyes. You turned to walk away before he saw your tears. You should have known. You should have known a man like him would never be serious. Not about you. 
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As soon as he let the words go, Dean realized what he was doing. Yeah, he was frustrated, but it wasn’t aimed at you. It couldn’t be aimed at you.
God knew he didn’t want to hurt you, or for you to hate him. He really couldn’t stomach either thought, so he relented and reached out to grab at your hand, before you could get too far. 
“Wait,” he said, managing to pull you back to him. “I’m sorry.”
You tugged your hand to try and free yourself from his grasp. 
“You know what, maybe you’re right,” you said, your voice wobbling with anger, dismay, and tears. “Maybe I ought to stop letting a man get even an inch into my heart. At this point, it’s my own fault.”
“Stop,” Dean demanded. “No, it’s not.” 
He pulled you back into him, but you looked away from his imploring gaze. Your breaths grew shallow while you tried in vain to stop yourself from crying. It damn well broke his heart.
“It’s not your fault. I’m just an idiot,” He cupped your cheeks and wiped your tears as they fell. “But you
you deserve to be happy. With a man that can take care of you, protect you. A man who has a little more of his life figured out.”
“You’re just saying that so you have an excuse for toying with me. So you can keep chasing skirts,” you said, pushing at his chest. “Yes, your brother told me about all your little exploits.”
Dean took the blow, both proverbial and physical, with a raise of his brows. He guessed he couldn’t blame you for that one. Still, the disdain behind your words stung. He allowed you to break free of him.
You stepped back and straightened your clothes. You took in a deep breath that did nothing to calm you, and you uttered a humorless laugh.
“I suppose it makes sense. Why would you want anything to do with me?” You gestured down at yourself with a dismissive hand. “A-a walking mess. Even when I am divorced, that’s how people will see me. Damaged goods. I don’t even know how I’m gonna tell my parents.”
You covered your face against Dean and the rest of the world, and after weeks and months, you finally allowed yourself the one thing you hadn’t since your first inkling that your husband was being unfaithful. You finally allowed yourself to break.
The first sob shuddered through your body, followed by hot tears. You squeezed your eyes against them and wiped at your face in vain.
Dean broke too, in his own way. He gathered you into his arms, where he shushed you gently and pressed a kiss to your forehead. 
“I wasn’t giving you an excuse,” he said.
Despite how much you wanted to push him away, the deep, steady timbre of his voice pierced you and soothed you at the same time.
“I meant every word I said. I may not be the right guy for you, but don’t you dare take a scrap of what anyone else might say, you hear me?” he said firmly. “You’re beautiful. You don’t suffer fools like me, and you’re better than that sad sack excuse of a man deserves.”
You looked up at him with watery eyes.
“You’re a lot of things, Dean Winchester, but you’re not a fool.”
He shook his head, not wanting to argue with you anymore. He just kissed you, deeply, thoroughly, the way you always imagined a kiss should be.
Except that you realized
this was goodbye. So you took advantage of every second of it.
You met him with as much as he gave and reached up to touch his cheek. It felt a little rough under your fingers, just like you remembered. You would probably always remember that feeling, long after you left the park.
That evening, you packed as many bags as you could. You put together the savings you’d been collecting for a few months. It had been at your coworker Jess’s advice, ever since you started feeling the inkling that something wasn’t right in your marriage.
After you were all packed, you took one last, long look at the space you had tried to make your home. With one last tear trailing your cheek, you stepped out of the apartment. You took the bus uptown, where you later checked into a hotel. 
When your husband finally got home from work, he would find a one-page letter written in your own hand. 
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For once, Sam was actually home in his apartment. He was helping Dean take his suitcase to the front door after calling a taxi to come shortly. Sam wasn’t happy about it though.
“You don’t have to go so soon, Dean,” said Sam.
Dean gave a humorless laugh. He grabbed his coat from the rack and threw it on.
“I’ve gotta get back to the house. It’s already been empty too long,” he said. Three years too long. “Fact is, I’m just getting in your way here.”
He couldn’t quite meet Sam’s eyes as he went to the door, but Sam stopped him with a pressing hand on his arm, tugging him back.
“Hey,” Sam said, his brows furrowed. “That’s not true. Where’d you get that idea?”
Dean raised his brows. “You mean the way you’ve haven’t been home more than a few hours a night? The way the only time I see you is if I go find you at that office. You should open up a Bed n’ Breakfast there. You’d make a double killing in this town.”
Sam wilted. “Dean, we opened the firm barely a month ago. I’m just trying to—”
Dean laid a hand on his shoulder, relenting.
“Hey, look. I’m not judging you, Sammy. I’m not,” he said. “You’re building something. I know that. I just need to go figure out how to do the same, whatever that means for me.”
Sam stared back at him, still with that frown. His guilt and reluctance to see Dean go was reflected in his eyes; those sad puppy dog eyes that used to get him out of almost any punishment with their parents when the boys were young. Before.
The corner of Dean’s mouth kicked up into a smirk.
“Don’t worry. I’ll see you again soon,” he said.
“How soon is soon?” Sam asked. It was something their mother used to say to John whenever he called late, promising he’d come home after long days in town buying supplies for the farm.
“The divorce papers will be served to Michael Milligan,” Sam added, pointedly raising his brows. “She
could use your support.”
Dean’s smile faded at the mention of you. His hand slipped from Sam’s shoulder.
“She’s got a strong head on her shoulders. She’ll be all right,” he said. He heard the honk of the taxi outside. He grabbed up his hat, set it on his head, and took up his bags. He turned back to Sam at the last moment. “I’m sure you’ll look out for her.”
It was somehow both a question, and an imploring charge. Sam sighed, but he nodded in agreement. His brother could be so very stubborn. Once he got an idea of what he thought he needed to do, there was almost no talking him out of it.
Sam opened the door for him and walked him out to the car, helping him with his bags. Before Dean could get into the cab, Sam stopped him. Their gazes met, but in that moment, no words were needed.
They pulled one another into a firm hug.
I’m sorry. I should’ve been there more for you.
Don’t worry about it. It’s already forgotten.
Dean released him first with a smile, and a heavy pat of Sam’s shoulder. He turned and climbed into the cab’s backseat. Afterwards, Sam watched the yellow cab take his brother away to the train station, feeling a weight in his heart that wouldn’t subside.
He would never know that Dean felt exactly the same way. Except that impossible weight felt a lot like your hand, gently laid over his heart.
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Dean took up his suitcase as the train pulled into the station. He stepped up onto the platform and retrieved the ticket from his pocket, but he paused, hearing a familiar voice shouting his name.
He turned his head and saw Sam rushing to meet him at the platform.
“What’s the matter? What’re you doing here?” Dean asked in surprise. He didn’t like the wary apprehension written across Sam’s face.
“I just took a closer look at Milligan’s finances,” he said. “Before you go, there’s something you might want to know.”
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AN: Come on, we needed at least one cliffhanger in this series! 😘 What do you think Sam rushed over to tell Dean? What did you think about their "goodbye," as well as her and Dean's goodbye? ...And are you ready for all the drama that's about to go down? lol 
Next Time:
Except the loud, insistent knock on the door broke you out of your thoughts. Straightening up with a frown, you set down your glass and went over to the door. Maybe it was Housekeeping coming up to bring you the fresh towels you asked for. The ones that had been laid out in the bathroom smelled musty.
You opened the door to a tall frame taking up room in the doorway. It was Michael, standing there both disheveled and steaming mad. He held your letter crumpled in his left hand. 
“Michael, what—what’re you doing here?” you gasped and stepped back. He followed you inside the room and slammed it shut. He looked around at your open suitcases in disbelief, then finally at you.
“What’s this supposed to mean, huh?” he demanded to know. He shook the flimsy piece of paper at you.
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siegecoffeemug · 10 months ago
Text
I wrote this on May 15th, still trying to understand and put my million questions into words.
They are still swirling throughout my mind.
Did i not communicate enough? I absolutely know i could have done better, and especially after trusting me enough to let me know some of the darker moments of your life. It meant a lot that you would share this all with me and i know that at some point you appreciated my understanding. Should i have asked you to share more? I didnt want to pry but in retrospect i wish id had at least let you know that you could if you ever wanted to. Im trying to think if i have ever betrayed your trust as surely that could be the reason that everything we built had to come apart. And i honestly dont believe that I ever did, given the importance I held in regards to what you had shared with me.
I always wanted to be better at small talk, but you made me comfortable enough with you, and told me you felt the same, to make me enjoy our times in silence in front of the telly so much, but we'd never just sit with any interaction would we?
Was i too comfortable with the level of love we'd achieved? I know i was broke, and still am, but I'd always rush to take you out at every opportunity but i truly loved the times when finances dictated we were limited to the flat and just enjoy each others company. You made me laugh and smile so fucking much.
Had we gone stale or something? I fucking hope not as my love for you grew and grew into the level it is today, one that I'm not sure I'll ever be able to extinguish. I definitely know the start to our year was slow but i didnt think it was anything to worry about, and typically enough that monday we finished, i was going to speak about our plans for the year, sheffield, LA, summer. I couldn't wait to get my mitts on you to fulfil that side of our relationship either. It aches so much to think that we only met like a quarter of our potential in that department too.
I wanted to watch you draw, paint, do calligraphy, do some zine stuff. I wanted to get you on one of my records somehow. I was so excited to learn and grow alongside you.
You were, and are, everything i think about, and my whole existence had developed into building myself into a man with a life you would be happy to share with, to be a partner who would love, trust, adore and care for you before all others. And this is why its so hard to accept. This is why its so hard to understand. And this is why it feels so impossible to stop loving you. As i had no notice or expectation that we'd even hit a difficult spot, never mind that we had passed the point of no return, my heart still beats for you and you alone, and i dont know if this will ever stop.
I had admired you from afar for years. I knew that you were beautiful . I knew you had the coolest fucking interests and tastes. I knew that as long as you were at least a nice person, that i quite possibly had found the love of my life.
And you were, and i know that this will never change.
I love you so much x
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