#fic: best friend's best friend
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in fics where luke gets plopped into the prequels i want every jedi within ten metres of him to think hes the weirdest jedi theyve ever seen. he has negative lightsaber form. he doesnt know what a kata is. he handstands when he meditates. his solution to sith is to try and have a chat. hes a political radical who keeps suggesting revolution. you ask him what the jedi code is and he says "kindness and compassion and helping those in need :) ". you ask how he used the force like that and he says some shit about how you are a luminous being limited only by your mind. the councils authority is just a suggestion. he is somehow the new favourite of both qui gon and yoda
#i think he Gets yoda in a way few do bc he knew him as a feral old man in a swamp and not Guy In Charge Of Everything#so he is yodas new best friend#and qui gon hears him talk for five mins and realises his ideal jedi is a real guy that exists#luke doesnt realise how much of a heretic he is okay he is a Luminous Being#luke skywalker#star wars prequels#stat wars original trilogy#sw originals#original trilogy#sw prequel trilogy#sw og trilogy#jedi order#star wars#sw#sw time travel fic#time travel au#the force#yoda#qui gon jinn#i think after a bit plo koon would also be a big fan#lee posts
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Brother's best friend! Simon who's always so smitten and sweet to you. Bringing along sweets and snacks whenever he comes over.
Brother's best friend! Simon who casually tucks your hair back, asking you bout' your day and listening and doting on every word.
Brother's best friend! Simon who takes you for a ride on his motorcycle, buying you ribbons and scarfs.
Brother's best friend! Simon who would fight with your brother if has to, to make your wishes come true.
Brother's best friend! Simon who agrees with you when you say, you can date whoever you want until it's Joe from class B, and he's beaten to pulp the very next day.
Brother's best friend! Simon whom you share your first smoke with, coughing and laughing as he bumps your nose.
Brother's best friend! Simon who expects a kiss on cheek too, after you say bye to your brother and absolutely goes pink when you place a chaste wet kiss on his face.
Brother's best friend! Simon who takes you on prom along so you don't feel left out, kissing you sweetly so you know how it feels.
Brother's best friend! Simon who gives you a summer job in his garage, watching you grow into a bigger person.
Brother's best friend! Simon who likes watching you in your summer dress hopping around and helping him like a good girl when he asks for some tool.
Brother's best friend! Simon who spreads your leg on his desk, lowering his mouth while your eyes connect with his, melting into a puddle when his tongue swipes along your clit, humming with your sweet juices.
Brother's best friend! Simon who has your legs in his lap as your brother and his fiance go on about their first meet while your friends are laughing.
Brother's best friend! Simon who goes crimson when you catch the flower bouquet your sister in law tossed, kissing your forehead so proudly.
Brother's best friend! Simon buying you a car when you graduate, watching you proudly when you drive up to your new shared home, going absolutely crazy when the wall is decorated with a huge poster, WILL YOU MARRY ME MRS.RILEY !
Brother's best friend! Simon hugging you as you melt in his big arms, âThat's not a question baby !â you half laughed and half sobbed, âI am gonna fire you if you say no.â he kissed your forehead delicately.
Brother's best friend! Simon who marries you with the twilight in his eyes, the same when you were sixteen, kissing you sweetly as fireworks go ablaze in your head.
Grim Reaper!Simon
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#call of duty x reader#call of duty#ghost cod x reader#cod simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost riley#simon ghost x you#simon riley x female reader#simon riley ghost#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#ghost x reader#ghost cod#cod x reader#cod#cod ghost#simon riley smut#simon riley fluff#simon ghost smut#call of duty smut#ghost call of duty#cod mwii#folkloregurl ficsđȘ©#simon riley#simon ghost fluff#ghost x you#x reader#brother's best friend
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Our Little Secret
Summary - Joel Miller deals with disgusting, intrusive thoughts about the girl next door who smells like vanilla and uses cherry chapstick.
Pairing - dbf!Joel Miller/Reader
Warnings - explicit sexual content MDNI, kinda perv!Joel, age gap, no cordyceps outbreak AU, reader's in high school but is eighteen, dom/sub undertones, seduction, underage drinking, body worship, unprotected sex, reader is called 'jailbaitâ by Tommy, oral sex, breeding kink if you squint, praise & degradation
WC: 11k
[crossposted to AO3]
Joel Miller told himself he wasnât a pervert. He just wasnât. Double glancing at a pretty, young girl didnât make him one of those guys â it just made him a man, right?
Never mind the fact that your father was one of his closest friends or the fact that you lived just next door, embodying half of the very typical scandalous, small-town affair. Never mind your eighteen year age difference. Never mind those obscene images that sometimes invaded his brain. Joel had heard the term once. He thinks Sarah might have told him about it from that science documentary she watchedâthose sordid images were called intrusive thoughts, right? Involuntary, unavoidable, unwanted.
It wasnât only him who stared in your direction a little longer than necessary, anyway. The very first time heâd seen you, Joel and Tommy had been in the driveway doing an oil change on the truck. You and your dad had just moved in, Joel had introduced himself the day prior and helped haul a bed frame through the front room. Your dad had mentioned he had a daughter, but Joel had expected to see a girl closer to Sarahâs age.Â
He hadnât expected to see you, wearing those tight blue jeans and that tiny tank top that left very little to the imagination. The straps were thin and the fabric billowy, and when you shifted the box beneath your arm from one hand to the other, the pretty pink fabric of your bra was out in the open for all eyes to see. Your hair had been pulled into a ponytail at the crown of your head, swishing back and forth with each step. It made Joel wonder about how soft the long strands were, how they would feel between his fingers, how they would look splayed out atop a pillowcase â intrusive thoughts.
Tommy was quick to abandon his tools and cross the front yard to greet your father, offering you what seemed like an innocent helping hand. Joel thinks his younger brother has no self control, but he leaves the truck too. Only to introduce himself, though. Definitely not to get a closer look.Â
Your voice is sweet, he thinks. It slides through him like a hot knife through butter. And when you laugh at Tommyâs awkward attempt at conversation, that sound stabs him in the chest because itâs so girlish. So young and youthful and airy. That pink lace is still poking out of the side of your shirt, even though Tommy now carries the box, and Joel strains himself trying to keep his eyes above your chin.Â
âAnd you must be Mr. Miller,â you say, sticking your tiny hand out to him.
He knows itâs a bad idea, but he doesnât want to be rude, so he takes your hand in his and shakes it gently. Your skin is soft, nails painted red and manicured and he wonders what other parts of you are this soft, wonders if red has always been his favorite color, wonders what it would look like wrapped around â âJust Joel,â he tells you, clearing those damn intrusive thoughts as quickly as they appear.Â
âJoel,â you repeat, tasting his name on your pink tongue and giving him a sweet smile. âThere's two more boxes. Wanna help me grab them?â
Heâs careful not to answer too fast, afraid of sounding too eager. But he agrees, and you lead him to the open truck bed, and as you bend over to grab the smaller box his hands flex at his sides. He thinks you must be doing this on purpose. Right? Torturing him, sticking your ass out, silently begging him to look. But he doesn't. Instead, Joel picks up the larger box and notices the scent of vanilla radiating off your skin. This is almost worse because his mouth begins to water.Â
âMy dad said you have a daughter,â you say.Â
âYeah. Sarah. Sheâs younger than you, though.â
âThatâs okay. Does she like cake? I have to bake one for my home ec final and could use a taste tester if sheâs not busy.â
It really puts things into perspective, and heâs glad for it. Finals. School. High school. âIâll ask her,â Joel says.Â
You lead everyone inside and direct all three men to take the boxes to the living room where you begin unpacking. You sit on the floor as you sift through the boxes, legs tucked underneath you, and Joel has to force a smile when you look up at him through your lashes. You say thank you, Joel from your knees and he feels something very, very wrong stir inside him.Â
Tommy follows him back outside, and on the way back to their truck his voice is high pitched in mockery as he says, âThank you, Joel! Youâre so handsome , Joel! Let me repay you with my body, Joel!â
He just laughs it off, but as he continues with the oil change beneath the hood an uncomfortable silence settles between him.Â
Eventually, Tommy shakes his head and snorts. âThat girl is nothing but fucking jailbait, man.â
He sees you quite a few times after that, because your dad works in construction, too. Joel drinks the same kind of beer, and your dad has a pool table in your garageâŠso, naturally, they become the best of friends and very quickly at that. Tommy joins the party too, and within months they become an inseparable trio.
Itâs during one of these nights when the three of them were standing in the garage with the door wide open, music playing from the speakers in your dadâs truck when those intrusive thoughts plague him again. Tommyâs losing at pool, drunk before the sunâs fully set, and your dad is laughing at something heâs saying.
Youâre walking home from practice and stop suddenly at the end of the driveway. Joel can see you, but he doesnât think Tommy or your dad can. The truck is in the way, but heâs in the perfect position. He stares a little too long, but he canât help it. Youâre wearing your cheer uniform, and your midriff is exposed, and your long legs are so fucking appetizing that his tongue sticks to the roof of his mouth. Your skirt is rolled up at the waist, making the fabric shorter than itâs supposed to be, making it sluttier than itâs supposed to be.
When you notice him staring, you shoot him a sinful little smile and raise your finger to your lips. A secret, Joel realizes. You want him to keep something a secret, and somehow it feels intimate, having something between the two of you. He watches you unroll the hem of your skirt and pull at the ends so it covers more of your legs. You turn in a semicircle, and he licks his lips, and when you look at him again you raise your hands in question.Â
He gives you a discreet thumbs up, and when you make your way up the driveway you give him the prettiest smile and say, âHey, Joel! Nice to see you!â
Tommy gives him shit for it later, but heâs too distracted at the sight of you in that uniform to even remember Joel exists.Â
âYouâre late,â your dad chastises. âPractice was over at five today. Itâs almost six.â
âTook the scenic route,â you reply easily, and Joel can hear the playful tone in your voice that lets everyone in the room know of your insincerity.Â
You walk past them, backpack slung over one arm, but before you disappear inside you wink at him over your shoulder.Â
âGet ready, Joel,â your dad tells him with an exasperated sigh. âTeenage girls are hell.â
And Joel is inclined to agree. Even more so when heâs laying in bed that night, wondering about all the things you couldâve been getting up to in that hour it took you to get home. The school was a short, ten minute walk from your house. And even if you truly did take the scenic route home, it wouldnât have taken you an entire hour to arrive.Â
So, what were you getting up to? Joel didnât think you had a boyfriend. At least, not one you ever brought home. But not having a boyfriend didnât mean anything. Not in this day and age. And Joel knew the mind of a teenage boy. He had been one, once upon a time, and knew without a doubt the lengths a boy your age would go to spend an hour alone with you. He thought about all of the things he was doing at eighteen, and his brain ran wild with those ideas.
After hours of laying there, unable to find sleep, Joel Miller took out his phone and opened a private search tab. It had been a long time since heâd done this, and heâd tried not to â truly, he had spent every minute since heâd closed his bedroom door trying to get the images out of his head. But it was like an itch he needed to scratch, becoming more and more irritating the longer he put it off. So, he typed cheerleader into the black and orange search bar and promised himself it was the one and only time heâd ever do this.Â
He just needed to get it out of his system. That was all.
(If he was honest, Joel knew as soon as the thought crossed his mind that it wasnât true. Even when he scrolled through the videos to find a girl who looked strikingly similar to you. Even when he turned his volume all the way down, and reached into his sweatpants with his free hand. Even when he squeezed his eyes shut and thought of that rolled up skirt and that pretty pink lace, pornographic images long forgotten in favor of the ones youâd supplied. Even when a few quick tugs was all it took to shoot thick ropes of cum across his belly. Even when he cleared his search history, cleaned himself up, and rolled over to sleepâŠeven then, he knew it would not be enough to get you out of his head.)
The next day, Joel saw you leaving for school and couldnât bear to look in your eyes. He couldnât stop thinking about what heâd done and feeling shameful, feeling like the very sordid man he knew himself not to be. He wasnât a pervert, but heâd certainly felt like one that day.
You waved your hand and beamed like you did every morning. But Joel didnât wave back. Oblivious to his atrocities, you played your hand at concern. âYou okay?â
âFine.â
âYou donâtâŠÂ seem fine. Is there anything I can do to help?â
Godâyour voice, full of kindness and sweet summery grace, was better than the audio in any porno heâd ever seen. âI said Iâm fine.â
Thankfully, you took the hint and scurried off, not dissimilar to a wounded animal. Guilt immediately choked him. But, pushing you away is what heâs supposed to do. So he doesnât change his mind.Â
At least, not at first.
He spends the entire summer going out of his way to avoid you. He offered to host guys nights at his house on the weekends instead of your dad's garage. He left for work five minutes earlier than normal to avoid having to hear you say good morning, Joel! and wave at him with those pretty red nails and smile at him with your pretty white teeth.
But once summer starts, you and Sarah begin spending way too much time together. And at first, it makes him nervous. You make him nervous. He doesnât want to make small talk. He doesn't want to see you in your uniform. He doesnât want to look at you at all, actually.
It works out in his favor though, Joel thinks, because you and Sarah have the same taste in movies, and she thinks you're the coolest thing thatâs ever existed, and so whenever Joel and Tommy are in your garage, youâre at Joelâs house with Sarah. So he doesnât have to be on edge, wondering if heâd turn the corner and youâd be standing there smelling like vanilla and wearing pink lace.Â
But then youâre hosting a high school graduation party a few short months after you move in. And your dad invites Joel and Tommy to the party in your backyard. In fact, he practically begs them to come and keep him company. And Joel canât say no, because what excuse would he have? Sarah would never let him skip it, anyway. And so his avoidance comes to an end, and he finds himself standing in your backyard with a glass bottle in his hands, watching people congratulate you and your accomplishments all day long. Straight Aâs in all those AP classes you took, your dad tells him proudly, clicking his tongs together over the grill. Joel knows youâre a smart girl, he doesnât need to know your grades to see that you have your head on straight, but he also knows youâre a far cry from the timid little girl your father believes you to be. Joel can see it in you.Â
Still, youâre far smarter than he is, because while Tommy drones on and on about a project heâs got going on at home, all Joel can notice is the pretty sundress youâre wearing. Itâs pink, like the lace that sometimes still haunts him. It clings to you at the top, molding sinfully against your chest, and flows out at the bottom, cutting off at your midthigh.
Itâs too short, Joel thinks. Way too short to be wearing around so many male classmates. Around your dadâs friends. Tommy likes younger girls, you know. And JoelâŠJoelâs turning away from you and swallowing whatâs left of his beer. He clinks the empty glass against Tommyâs and asks, âYou need another?â
Your dad is the one who answers. âHow about a shot of whiskey? The cabinet above the sink.â
Joel thinks it's a fantastic idea. He gets stopped by Mr. Adler on the way inside, who asks what the celebration is. He talks for far longer than heâd like, and by the time he gets to the kitchen, Joel really needs something stronger than beer.Â
Except, when he steps into the room, he freezes the moment he sees you standing there. Your head whips in his direction, eyes wide as if youâve been caught. Itâs only as he tears his attention away from you and notices the two red solo cups on the counter and the bottle of tequila in your hands, perched over them, that he realizes what heâd just walked in on.Â
Your cheeks are pink, the same hue as your dress, and you quickly try to explain it away. âJoel! Hey! This isnâtâŠIâm not likeâyou know, itâs just a celebration andâŠIâll be nineteen soon andâI mean, itâs just a little .â
He raises his eyebrows, unsure of how to navigate this terrain. On the one hand, he feels the need to discipline you somehow. To turn this into a lesson of sorts, to let you know how the age of legal alcohol consumption is twenty one for a reason, that being drunk in a social setting like this is dangerous, especially for a girl like you.
But on the other hand, Joel knows heâs not responsible for you. Heâs not your father, and heâs not going to be the one to give you the speech about underage drinking. Heâd been far younger than eighteen-almost-nineteen the first time heâd gotten drunk. And you were rightâŠthis was a celebration.Â
The war in his brain seemed to dim what little common sense he had because Joel found himself standing behind you with almost no room to spare. The sweet scent of vanilla filled the space. Youâd curled your hair, and the ends tickled the inside of his arm. Soft. So, so soft he could die. He puts his big hand on your bare shoulder, and reaches above you into the cabinet, finding the half empty bottle of whiskey. His fingers twitch with the urge to squeeze your supple flesh. Christ. Itâs just a fucking shoulder, Joel, he tells himself. âItâs your party,â he says. âI wonât tell.â
It feels wrong just to say it to you. I wonât tell. Perverted thing to say, Joel thinks. You spin around to face him, and suddenly your breasts are brushing his chest, and Joel canât breathe. âThank you,â you whisper, taking your bottom lip between your teeth and sending him into his fucking grave.Â
Itâs then, as he stares down at you and you stare up at him all sweet and innocent-like, that Joel finally admits to himself that avoidance has done absolutely fucking nothing to put out the fire you started. He clears his throat. âYeah, yeahâitâs, uhmâŠitâs no problem. Have fun.â
He turns to leave, but then your arms are around his neck and he canât smell anything but vanilla and he can feel your tits pressing into him, can feel you everywhere. But Joel isnât a mean man, so what can he do but hug you back? If someone walked in, theyâd think it was a fatherly embrace. Proud. Protective, even.Â
But they wouldnât know that all Joel could think about is the way your skin felt under his calloused hands. Or the way your soft hair tickled his cheek as he laid it against the top of your head. Or the way your hips were nestled right between his thighsâand you were so warm andâ
Intrusive thoughts.
âYouâre the best, Joel,â you say, eyes bright and cheery. Heâs relieved when you pull away, but also a little bit empty. He watches you pour a shot into each red solo cup. âYou know, Iâve never tried whiskey. It seems so, likeâŠÂ manly .â You giggle, and itâs music to his ears but Joel begins to wonder if maybe this isnât your first time stealing from the tequila bottle tonight.Â
âItâs definitely not the best tasting thing in the world,â he says. âGets the job done, though.â
To put the tequila away, you have to stand on the tips of your toes. It elongates your entire body as you stretch upwards, and he canât bring himself to stop staring at the curve of your hips. âYou have to be drunk to hang out with me or something?â
The question surprises him. Yes, he thinks. Yes, he does need to be inebriated to hang out with you because otherwise his sober mind never lets him forget the way you look all dolled up. But he doesnât say that. Instead, Joel laughs quietly and says, âIâm here for your old man. You think he wants to be the lone adult in this sea of kids?â
He says it as a joke and is thankful you find humor in it. âIâm not a kid, Joel,â you remind him. âIâm a woman now. Is my company really so bad?â You tilt your head, pushing your bottom lip into the tiniest little pout.Â
Joel needs to stop staring at your mouth. He knows it, because the urge rises in him to bite that lip, to surge forward and taste your tongue for remnants of tequila. The idea alone sends a bolt of white-hot desire straight to his dick. âNo, noâŠsânot like that,â he says. Heâs too focused on your face and the gleam in your pretty eyes to notice youâve unscrewed the top of the whiskey bottle.Â
You pour a shot into an empty solo cup and hold it up between the two of you. âIâm scared,â you admit sheepishly. âIs it gross?â
The wrinkle in your nose is the cutest thing heâs ever seen, and the sight forces his lips into a small smile. âI donât think so,â he says. âBut you might.â
âBecause Iâm a kid ?â You scoff, but shake your head and smile at him all the same. âWomen mature faster than men, you know. Which means when I make my decisions, I know what Iâm signing myself up for.âÂ
âOh, is that so?â He remembers being this cocky as a teenager. He thinks maybe youâve been spending too much time around Tommy and his defiant attitude is rubbing off on you. Joel offers a challengeâif youâre just so mature. âDrink up, then.â
He watches every microscopic movement as you lick your lips and lift the cup to your mouth. Itâs a beautiful sight, watching you tilt your head back and swallow the tiniest bit. And when you pass the remaining liquid to him, your expression is fashioned from steel. Nonchalant, blank.Â
But he sees it, sees the way your hands twitch at your sides, sees the way your jaw feathers as you clench your teeth. He canât help but chuckle at your persistence. Joel turns the cup in his hands and puts his mouth right where you did.Â
Itâs almost like kissing, he thinks. Having his mouth where yours was seconds ago feels good. Better than he thought it would. And he can taste cherry-flavored chapstick before he can taste the whiskey, and he wonders when the last time was when heâd had a shot because it goes straight to his head and makes him feel drunk. Or maybe itâs just the wide smile that stretches across your face.Â
âThatâs awful,â you confess. âIâll stick to tequila, I think.â
âTequilaâs worse,â he says with a shake of his head. Tequila makes Joel feel your age, makes him forget the word consequences, makes him buzz with energy.Â
âNo way,â you say. âThe taste isnât nearly as strong.â
While that may be true, it wasnât about the taste at all and he doesnât really know how to explain it. âTequila encourages people to make bad decisions.â
Your eyes widen in surprise. âBad decisions,â you echo contemplatively. âSounds like a great time.â You take both of your tequila filled cups in hand and press a kiss to his cheek. âThanks for always keeping my secrets,â you whisper.Â
Joel has to stand in the kitchen an extra few minutes after you leave because he still feels the ghost of your lips on his skin and doesnât know how to act. Eventually, though, he finds the courage to face his brother and your father. He stays for the remainder of the party and helps your dad clean up the yard after everyone filters out.Â
Itâs a relief when heâs finally in his own bed that night. He tries to resist thinking of you. Truly, he does â but itâs no use, and heâs alone in his bed, and this time he doesnât even reach for his phone when he touches himself.Â
And itâs good. So good that he tries to draw it out. He tries his damndest to make it last. But his efforts become futile in just minutes, because he can feel your soft lips, can taste cherry chapstick, and heâs right thereâright fucking thereâwhen his bedroom door creaks open.Â
âJoel?â
For a second, heâs convinced himself heâs gone crazy. Heâs well and truly lost it now, and his fantasies have grown into hallucinations at this point. Youâve driven him batshit insane. But his eyes focus in the dark, and he realizes his mind isnât playing tricks on him at all. âWhat are you doing here?â
You take it as an invitation, and he desperately wishes you wouldnât. He can still feel the buzz from the beer and whiskey, and his cock is hard beneath the sheets, and his brain is filled with images of you, and youâre in nothing but spandex shorts and a loose tank top, and when you sit on the side of his bed you lay your hand on his knee for balance and Joelâs hands shake.Â
âHow did you even get in?â
âI used the key under the mat,â you confess. âI need your help.â Your voice is so mousy and soft, and it pulls him back to his senses.Â
âWhatâs wrong?â
âYou were right,â you tell him. âI made a bad tequila decision and now Iâm sad.âÂ
Joel doesnât know what to say. You couldnât possibly still be tipsy, he thinks. Itâs been hours since he saw you in the kitchen, but he supposes you very well couldâve gone back after everyone left. Either way, youâd come to him to fix it, and even knowing the right thing would be to call your dad, he was still high on the second secret you two shared. So, Joel sighs and puts his hand on yours. âWhat did you do?â
âI snuck a boy into my room,â you say.
Joelâs jaw clenches. Anger rises in his chest, crawls up his throat, and chokes him. A million things cross his mindâfirst, what the hell did he do to you? Did he hurt you? Joel would find the boy and break his fucking jaw. Did he touch you? Maybe heâd break the boy's hands instead. Or, worse, did he touch you when you didnât want him to? The thought alone has his heart beating so fast he thinks he might die. Slowly, quietly, he asks, âWhat happened?â
âNothing,â you sigh. And it isnât one of those teenage girl nothings, itâs sincere. You climb over him to the other side of the mattress, and Joel thinks he should stop you but the sight of you in his bed is so fucking pretty that he canât bring himself to. âThatâs the problem. I wanted him to fuck me.â
The words give him pause. Everything freezes.Â
âBut he didnât want to,â you say. âEven though we were flirting all day.â You turn on your side, hands beneath your head. âI donât get it. Is it because Iâm not pretty?â
He canât stop the snort that leaves him at that. Joel canât believe youâd wonder about it for even a second.
âDo you think Iâm pretty, Joel?â
If thereâs anything in the world he hates, itâs this. He wonders a little if maybe youâre antagonizing him. Itâs a yes or no question, isnât it? So why does saying yes feel soâŠÂ heavy? Weighted? He decides it best to keep the conversation directed away from his personal opinion on the matter. âOf course youâre pretty, baby.â
Baby? God. Maybe he has lost his fucking mind.
But it seems to bring you so much joy he doesnât have it in him to regret it. You wrap your small hands around his bicep, and he can feel the heat in your touch, and itâs like heâs burning from the inside out. And when you turn a little more and bring your leg across his hips, Joel canât breathe.Â
He wonders if you can tell how hard he is, wonders how heâs supposed to push you away when you just keep withering away his resolve. If he hasnât lost his mind yet, heâs about to. âIs it okay if I sleep with you tonight?â
The words hit him like a freight train. But after a second, he realizes that you actually mean sleep âand he knows itâs a bad idea still because heâs having those intrusive thoughts once more. But he canât say no. So instead he says, âI donât think your dad would be comfortable with that.â
âIâll tell him I had a sleepover with Sarah,â you quickly supplied. âI donât want to be alone.â
He doesnât either. But Joel knows he should be. And if not alone, certainly not with you. And yet, he says nothing. Not yes or no, just nothing.Â
âCan I tell you a secret?â
âSure.â
âI think about you all the time,â you say. âI thought you were mad at me for a while. That made me sad, too.â
It made his chest ache to think he had caused you any harm. But it was for the best, wasnât it? You probably just saw him as someone to seek comfort in, and he saw you as something entirely different. He was no good. Definitely not for you.Â
A few minutes pass, and he thinks youâve fallen asleep, but then you kiss his cheek again in the same spot as this afternoon and say, âThank you, Joel.â And he feels so wrong. He feels awful, and selfish, and greedy, and desperate, and perverted.
He thinks thatâs the end of it. But then you kiss his jaw, and this time itâs an open mouthed kiss that leaves wetness on his skin. Joel shivers.Â
You kiss his neck, and his cock throbs inches from your thigh. He should stop this. He knows that. Joel isnât a stupid manâheâs just a bad man. He doesnât stop you when you climb into his lap. He doesnât stop you when your tongue darts out between your lips as you kiss his collarbone. He doesnât stop you when your kisses grow heated and heavy.
And when you kiss his lips, he doesnât stop himself from kissing you back. He doesnât stop himself from threading his fingers through your silky hair to pull you in deeper. He doesnât stop himself from biting that bottom lip and sucking off the cherry flavor. He doesnât stop himself from slipping his tongue into your mouth, or from lifting his hips just a little bit, pushing himself against you. The friction pulls a low groan from somewhere in the back of his throat, and Joel knows he won't be able to ever stop himself now.Â
You take the small movement as your cue to unleash yourself and roll your hips against his even harder. He can feel the wet heat radiating from you even through the spandex shorts, can feel his benevolence fading into the ether. You let out a breathless moan when you roll your hips again, and again, and again. And he curses, muscles tight, and feels a confession on the tip of his tongue. Joel wants you to say it, just once â wants to hear his name in your mouth shrouded in lust. Heâs imagined it so many times, but he wants to hear it.Â
But then you pull away abruptly. âJoel?â
You sound mousy again, and he feels suddenly ice cold. âYeah?â
âI think Iâm gonna be sick.â
He holds your hair away from your face for the remainder of the night as you vomit up the rest of the tequila in your stomach. You apologize over and over again and greedily drink up the water he brings you.Â
Normally, Joel would hate this. But itâs you, and something feels good about taking care of you. About making sure youâre safe, making sure you feel pretty even with sweat coating your pallid skin.
You fall asleep sometime in the middle of the night, and Joel carries you to his bed. He doesnât climb in next to you. He canât because he already feels bad enough for allowing a drunk eighteen year old girl into his bed. Itâs his turn to feel nauseous. Shame smothers him, and guilt, and mortificationâŠJoel knows he should feel regret, too. But he doesnât.Â
Sometime before sunrise, he nods off with his head resting against the bedside table. He doesnât hear you leave, but when he wakes an hour later youâve vacated the room.Â
He wonders if you remember how you ended up in his bed, if you remember how eager he was to taste your mouth, if you remember anything at all. He hopes not, because that would mean a conversation he was not equipped to handle.Â
When he trudges down to the kitchen, Joel stops upon the sight before him. Sarah sits at the kitchen table beside Tommy, whoâs sitting across from your dad. And then thereâs youâstanding in the kitchen with a spatula in your hand and two still-wet braids in your hair.
It isnât the fact that youâre in his kitchen, making pancakes for everyone, padding barefoot on the tile that makes him anxious. No one in the room can read his thoughts. They wouldnât know how much it pleases him to see it. They wouldnât know how he thinks he could get used to this, but knows he canât.
NoâŠno, itâs the fact that youâre wearing his flannel that makes him anxious. Your father wears flannels on occasionâŠbut this one is so plainly Joelâs that he wonders why your dad is sitting there laughing at something Sarah said instead of killing Joel with his bare hands. He swallows thickly and pours himself a cup of coffee.Â
âGood morning,â you say cheerily, as if last night hadnât happened. He thinks youâve forgotten, or maybe just decided not to ever mention it again.
It was only a lapse in judgment, after all, wasnât it? Just a split second where you and Joel both lost all sense. It didnât mean anything. It couldnât. âMorning,â he responds.Â
You ask him to help carry one of the heaping plates of fluffy pancakes to the table. When he reaches for the taller one, your hand brushes against his and Joel nearly jumps out of his skin at the contact. But then youâre holding your pinky out to him expectantly, and whisper, âOur little secret.âÂ
The vanilla scent is gone, Joel notices. You smell like irish spring instead. Realization dawns on him that you must have showered while he was asleepâ and used his body wash. Thereâs something about that little tidbit of information that sits with him. He likes it, he thinks. He likes smelling himself all over you, likes that something possessed you to use his things without asking. Something inside of him shifts, somethingâŠÂ intense.Â
He knows he shouldnât, but Joel winds his pinky finger around yours anyway. It feels so good to have yet another thing between the two of you. Something of yours that belongs only to him. It makes him feel giddy as if he wasnât running on a single sip of coffee and an hour of sleep.
The remainder of the summer goes on without incident. You donât end up in Joelâs bed again, though you never once leave his intrusive thoughts. He sees you sometimes, tanning in the backyard. He has a perfect view from his bedroom window, and he wonders if maybe you wear those tiny bikini tops for his benefit. But he never asks, even during the few moments you have alone, and is content to pine after you but not touch for the rest of his painfully sorry life.Â
He works. You taunt him. He plays pool in your garage. You come home late in too little clothes and smelling of vanilla scented tequila. Joel says nothing, though. He listens and agrees with your dad that since graduating youâve become a little wild . A littleâŠÂ defiant. They dance around the word bad, but Joel knows the truth. Knows that more than anything, you need a little bit of discipline.Â
Youâre not his to correct, though. So he doesnât. He certainly enjoys watching you, however. He watches you sneak out through your window one night when heâs sitting on the porch. You press your finger to your lips, creating another secret between the two of you. He walks into the kitchen one night to find you filling a vodka bottle with water. Joel says nothingâbut after grabbing another beer heâs got a smile on his lips he canât seem to shake.Â
Heâs mowing the grass in the backyard one sunny afternoon, and he catches a glimpse of something he shouldnât. Joel holds a lot of your secrets close these days, but this one isâŠdifferent.Â
Through your bedroom window, he can see you changing. The curtain is wide open, and youâre wearing nothing but that same pink bra he first saw you in, matching panties, and those knee high socks you used to wear with your cheer uniform. Heâs not sure if youâre getting out of your clothes or into ones more comfortable, but he knows he canât look away. His mouth is dry, and all the blood in his head rushes south. He thinks youâre beautiful. He wants to touch you so badly itâs overwhelming. The supple curves of your hips, the soft tendrils of your hair down your back, the swell of your breastsâ God, youâre the sexiest thing heâs ever seen.Â
And then you pick something up from the floor, and Joel realizes a second later that youâre putting on his flannel. The one you stole at the beginning of the summer. Do you wear it often? Do you always wear it alone, half naked in your bedroom? His lips part and his breath catches in his throat. Heâs not there. Heâs just standing in his backyard, ruining this patch of grassâŠbut a part of him is. Something of his is there, with you, touching you, and somehow it sets him on fire.Â
Especially when he watches you climb into bed. He wonât watch you sleep, he decides. He might have intrusive thoughts and secrets and uncontrollable fantasies, but heâs not a creep.Â
Except you donât go to sleep, so Joel continues to watch. He watches you run red painted fingers over your bare skin, between your breasts, over your belly, and back up. You do it again, slower this time, and Joelâs cock strains in his jeans. He watches you slip your hand beneath the band of your panties. He canât see any details from this far away, but his breathing synchronizes with the speed of your fingers.
Suddenly, he remembers youâre still in his flannel. Realizes that you put it on to touch yourself. Pressure builds in his cock, and he finally admits that yeahâ maybe heâs a little bit of a perv. But only for youâthereâs something about you that drives him fucking insane.Â
He stands there and watches you touch yourself until you finish. He revels in the small arch of your back, in the tremble of your legs, in the way your chest heaves with each ragged breath on the come down. He wants to clean you up with his fucking tongue.Â
Joel doesnât finish mowing the lawn that night.
When you go off to college, he canât deny what a massive relief it is. You move across Texas to some campus far away, and the distance makes him feel like he can breathe easily again. He stops having so many disgusting, intrusive thoughts. He stops feeling guilty every time he plays pool with your dad because those secrets he kept for you were ones that donât truly matter. Not when youâre nowhere to be found, anyway.Â
As the year stretches on, Joel realizes that heâd been wrong all along. He wasnât a pervert. You are a seductress. Even Tommy jokes about the obvious schoolgirl crush you had and admits one night when itâs just the two brothers that if you had thrown yourself at him, he wouldnât have been able to resist you so easily as Joel had.
Itâs not him thatâs in the wrong. Itâs you. You and your soft hair. You and your pretty smile. You and your red nails. You and your pink lace. You and your soft voice. You, you, you.Â
For several years, those intrusive thoughts haven't plagued him. Not until your junior year of college, when some problem with campus housing surfaces and youâre forced to stay at home for a few days. Your dad is excited about it and forces the four of you to go out to dinner together to catch up.Â
He sees you for the first time in so long, and you look so different but somehow even prettier. Youâre wearing a short white dress, and Sarah tells you you look like an angel, and Joel silently agrees. You have a tattoo on the inside of your wrist. Itâs the tiniest little image of two hands with their pinkies wrapped around one another, and he thinks itâs so fitting for a girl with so many secrets.Â
Every time you look at him during dinner, Joel shifts in his seat. He isnât very hungry. Not for food, anyway. Heâs a little floored when you proudly present your shiny, brand new ID to the waitress and order a fruity pink drink called a Paloma. You explain that it has tequila in it, and share a subtle glance across the table, and Joel feels his insides warm as if he was the one drinking a cocktail instead.Â
He drowns himself in work the entire week. He cannotâ cannot afford to find himself back in his old ways. Youâre a woman now. A fully grown woman, who no longer needs validation from older men. He knows you're not interested. He knows this time, this time, it really is Joel whoâs the problem. Avoidance, surprisingly, works.Â
Until you knock on the door one night with a DVD in your hand. âIs Sarah home? I found my old copy of Evil Dead. She said she missed having movie nights.â
Joel shakes his head. âNo, uhmâshe spent the night with a friend. Sorry.â
âOh,â you deflate. âThatâs okay, I get it. Sheâs older now. ItâsâŠâ
âWeird,â he finishes.Â
You laugh softly, and the sound brings a smile to his face. âYeah, really weird,â you agree. âI just hope sheâs nothing like me.â
âWhyâs that?â Your eyes darken, and Joel asks himself why heâs attempting to make conversation at all. Itâs dangerous. He knows this.Â
âYou know,â you say purposefully. âAll those secrets? There were definitely more.â
For a reason he canât pinpoint, it makes him a little annoyed. He knew it the whole timeâof course,  he knew there were more secrets than just the ones he was privy to. But a part of him wanted to know you better than anyone else. And maybe he did, for a second, but that second was long gone now. It was probably over moments after it began. âYeah, wellâŠthatâs different.â
âHow so? Sheâs only a little younger than I was when I met you.â
Itâs an accusation. Joel can feel it. He can feel the anger seeping through your fake sweetness, too. But he doesnât understand it. He didnât do anything wrong. âYouâre not my daughter. Thatâs whatâs different.â
You roll your eyes, and his hands twitch with the urge to grab you by the jaw. âGod, Joelâyouâre such a pussy. Do you know that?â
Your words startle him. A crease forms between his brows, and he takes another step out of the doorway. â Excuse me ?â
âJust say it! Say what you so desperately want to say. I can take it. Say it.â
The words come out slow and deadly, sounding far meaner than intended. âSay what?âÂ
âTell me itâs different because Iâm a slut. Itâs okay, Joel. Itâs just the two of us now. Go ahead. Admit it.â
His jaw ticks.Â
âWhat, you think Iâm dumb? You think I donât hear you laugh at Tommyâs jokes when I walk out of a room? You think I didnât know you guys called me jailbait for years?â You laugh cynically, arms crossed over your chest, and Joel thinks heâs never seen you so angry. So heated.Â
So hot.
He grabs your elbow and yanks you close. âHave you lost your fucking mind?â
Your face is inches from his, and he can smell vanilla and cherry and something happens. Something familiar and unique to you. Something disgusting. âAnd you know what the worst part of it all is?â
The worst part is that heâs twice your age. The worst part is that heâs known you since you were in high school. The worst part is that heâs friends with your father. The worst part is that youâre friends with his daughter. The worst part is that those perverted thoughts were never involuntary. They were never unavoidable. They were never unwanted. They were never intrusive.Â
âYou like it,â you say with a smirk. âYou like that I dress up in short skirts for you, and you like it when I climb in your bed when someone else leaves me unsatisfied. I almost finished that day, did you know?â
â Jesusâfuck âdonâtââ
âYou barely touched me but I was so close just sitting in your lap. You like that I put on your clothes and touch myself in front of my window, hoping youâll see. You like that Iâm a slut for you, Joel Miller. Admit it. Itâs okay. Itâll be our little secret .â
He pulls you into the house and slams the front door closed. His blood boils beneath his skin. He should have slammed it in your face, he thinks. But youâre here nowâtrapped inside with him. Or maybe heâs trapped inside with you.Â
The pleased smile on your face is his undoing. His breath comes fast, and he knows if he moves an inch there will never be any going back from this. So he doesnât move. His limbs are frozen and his eyes are fixed on yours.
After a couple of tense filled seconds, your smile falters. Joel sees it. He hears the slight change in your voice too, as you confess, âI want you to touch me so badly.â
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck âJoel holds your face in his hands and slams his mouth to yours. You taste just the same; cherry sweet and delicious. Itâs his favorite flavor, he thinks. Better than any forbidden fruit. Your tongue is so soft against his and impossibly more greedy. You invade his mouth, his soul, his heart.Â
It happens so fast, and so easily. Your arms loop around his neck and Joel pulls you flush against him and grips the back of your thighs. He lifts you up and you wrap your legs around his waist, hips already rolling against him like some feral thing inside of you is desperately clawing to get out. His cock has never been this hard, Joel knows. And he knowsâhe knows that he could cum just like this. Touching you, tasting you, feeling your softness. Itâs enough.Â
Still, he wants more. He wants to see you fall apart. He wants to reach inside your chest and make you feel what he feels, make you feel tortured the way heâs been for years.Â
Joel walks to the sofa and sits with his legs spread wide. Youâre still kissing him with everything you have, and itâs a clash of tongues and lips and teeth that he loves so much itâs an effort to thread his fingers into the hair at the nape of your neck and pull you away, but he does it. Youâre both panting, and you let out a whimper at the loss of contact. His cock is throbbing, straining behind his jeans. âPut your money where your mouth is, baby,â he says breathlessly. âYou wanna act like a slut for me, be a slut for me.â
He fists your dress in his hands and pulls it up and over your head, tossing it to the floor. And then itâs just you, sitting in Joelâs lap, wearing nothing but pink, lace panties and a pair of strappy white heels. Youâre so pretty, and heâs always known itâbut seeing you up close has him weak. He canât keep himself from touching you, from running his hands over your hips and living the fantasy heâs existed in for what feels like forever.Â
Once he starts, Joel canât stop. He runs his calloused palms over your belly, your ribs, allowing his thumbs to ghost across the underside of your breasts. He moves slowly, meticulously, enjoying every moment. And when you hook your thumbs in the band of your panties with the intention to remove them, he places his hands over yours. âHell no,â he says. âYou think you can tell me you almost finished in my lap that night and get away with it?âÂ
âBut, Iââ
âNuh-uh. Prove it.â
Hesitantly, you tilt your hips against his. He wishes he was in only sweatpants the way he was that night because his jeans are keeping the feeling of your wetness away from him this time. But he can see itâthe baby pink fabric is darker at the apex, and as you grind your hips against his Joel realizes youâre creating a mess on his clothes, too.Â
He understands. He really, really does. He feels it, too. Joel understands how desperate and needy you are. And because heâs just so understanding, he grants you a little reprieve. He leans forward and takes your nipple into his mouth. Heâs real sweet about it too, giving you the same tender treatment your mouth gave him that night in his room. He licks the hardened peak softly, swirling his tongue, and you let out the prettiest moan heâs ever heard. The pace of your hips picks up, rolling against the bulge in his jeans faster.Â
âOh, god,â you whimper. Your breath catches, and he can hear your heart beating rapidly behind your ribcage. He peppers kisses across your sternum and inhales deeply, sucking in a breath thatâs nothing but you and holding it in his lungs. He kisses your other nipple and pinches the one wet with his spit between his thumb and forefinger.Â
He sucks your nipple into his mouth and groans when you fist your hands in his hair. You sound so pretty, he thinksâand he leans back on the couch to admire just how pretty you look. He canât catch his breath, but he doesnât mind.
Your pace falters the slightest bit, and your chest is heaving a little slower now. He sinks lower into the couch and thrusts his hips up into youâonce, twice, and your legs are shaking. âAww,â he coos. âYouâre so sensitive, baby. Look at you.â
Too lost in your own bliss, Joel decides to help you, to teach you. He grabs your chin and forces it down, forces your attention to where your bodies are joined.
âI told you to look,â he repeats. Joel turns his fingers in the waistband of your panties and pulls them taught, creating even more pressure against your clit. The pink fabric immediately becomes darker, sopping up some of the mess youâve created on top of him, and Joel intends to make good on his wish to clean you up with his tongue. But not yetânot when you still have something to prove. âYou gonna cum just like that? Hm?â
You nod frantically, your attention flickering between his dark eyes and your panties clutched between his thick fingers. â Yes,â you tell him, legs trembling. Your pace is quick, and each roll of your hips becomes shorter and shorter. And with Joel moving underneath you it only takes seconds more before you combust. âOh, fuckâfuckâIâm coming, Iâm comingâ!â
âThatâs it,â he says, and you feel the deep timbre of his voice skitter across your skin like embers. âThere you go. Youâre being such a good slut for me, hm?â
When your orgasm finally fizzles out, you fall limply forward and Joel is there to catch you, like he always has been, like he silently vows he always will be. He rubs soothing circles against your spine and presses sweet kisses into your hair, waiting patiently as you try and regain what little composure you have left.Â
You lift your head from the crook of his neck, and your eyes are glossy and your bottom lip is swollen and your cheeks are flushed with a rosy hue, and Joel thinks youâve never been more beautiful. But then you slide from his lap to the floor in one fluid movement, and he realizes that this is the prettiest youâve ever been; on your knees before him, eyes bright with anticipation and excitement. You place your hands on top of his strong thighs, look up at him through your lashes and ask softly, âCan I suck your dick, Joel?â
He has to squeeze his eyes shut. He has to because his cock is so fucking hard and your voice is so sweet and filthy he canât handle it. He breathes in slowly through his nose and says, âOf course you can, baby.â
Without a moment's hesitation, you unbuckle his belt. The metal clinks in your fingers, and Joelâs heart is racing when you unbutton his jeans and hook your thumbs through the loops to tug them down. His cock snaps against his belly, and you lick your pink lips.
You take it in your hands, and Joel aches when you swipe your tongue over the tip, tasting the salty sweetness of his precum. He canât believe this is really happening, that youâre really here, running your sweet, sweet tongue over every inch of his cock. Youâre tasting him, savoring him, and Joel wonders if it pleases you to see him all bent out of shape like this.Â
He prides himself on his masculinity. Heâs always been a strong man, one who handles his shit on his own. Maybe itâs the Texas in him, but Joelâs always had traditional values. Heâs always been the provider, the protectorâheâs always been the one in charge. But when you wrap your lips around him and ease his cock into your hot, wet mouth, heâs at your complete mercy.Â
â Fuck,â he hisses, hands going to your hair. He tangles the silky strands between his fingers, and you hollow out our cheeks, creating a suction that has him groaning. He feels each pass of your lips down his spine, pressure forming low in his belly. âJust like that, pretty girl.â
You wrap your hand around the base and stroke the length you canât fit into your mouth, and his grip in your hair tightens. Your nails are painted redâand the look of them wrapped around his cock is far better than heâd ever been able to imagine in his head. Itâs so good that he doesnât want to stop, he wants to cum just like this. He wants to expend himself at the back of your throat and watch his cum leak out of your mouth.
But Joel doesnât get too far ahead of himself. There are other things, filthier things he wants to do to you than fill your mouth up. You let out a whiny groan as if sucking him off is somehow more pleasurable for you than it is for him. Itâs the sexiest thing heâs ever seen, and the vibrations nearly send him over the edge, but Joel rips your head back to prolong this precious time with you.Â
Your eyes are glassy, makeup smeared, lips swollen. You give him a beaming smile and Joel huffs a breath. âDid I do a good job?â
â Yes, baby,â he says. âYou did so well. Câmere, stand up.â You do as told, even though your legs are wobbly, and Joel lifts your foot into his lap. He unbuckles the straps of your heel, takes it off and sets it aside. He presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh and repeats the action with the other one, and then proceeds to pull your panties down your legs. He helps you out of the pink lace, and he knows he shouldnât but he just canât help himself and shoves them between the couch cushions, where he hopes youâll forget about them.
He presses his mouth to your hip bone, an open mouthed kiss that leaves goosebumps in its wake as he does the same to your other side. âThat feels so good,â you tell him.
Joel keeps peppering wet kisses across your belly, below your navel, over your pubic bone. Your thighs are pressed together, and youâre shifting on your feet in anticipation, and Joel can see the shiny wetness coating your pussy. He reaches between your legs and so gently slides his middle finger teasingly over your slit. It comes away sticky and wet, and he canât resist the urge to lick the digit clean. Itâs heady and sweet, and he feels drunker than whiskey or tequila has ever made him. âOh, sweetheart,â he says, forehead falling against your abdomen. âWhat are you doing to me?â
âItâs okay,â you tell him. âI want you so bad, Joel. Please touch me.â Your hands are in his hair, stroking the unruly curls and lightly pulling.
The word please in your mouth sounds so fucking cute, so needy and desperate. What is he supposed to do? How is he supposed to be a good man when you exist? He canât, Joel knows. So long as youâre nearâheâll never be a good man. Only a bad one. Only a perverse one. He hooks his arm around your leg and lifts it over his shoulder, keeping his other hand wrapped around your waist for balance, and lets himself taste you fully, to drink from the source.Â
And Jesus Christ, Joel loses it. He laps at your pussy, swallowing you up. He cleans up the mess you made in his lap, relishing in the decadence. He could do this for hours, he thinks. Could swirl his tongue around your swollen clit, could suck it between his lips, and kiss it softly for the rest of his life. He breathes in slowly, taking your scent deep into his lungs, and wonders why heâd ever want to come up for air. Your moans are music to his ears.
He dares a glance up at you to watch your expression when he reaches beneath you and slips a finger easily into your dripping pussy.Â
Your head falls back, your mouth falls open, and Joel falls in love.Â
The noises you make are obscene as you grind against his face, but not nearly as much as the sounds heâs making from between your legs. Heâs groaning with your clit in his mouth and youâre creating a puddle in his palm, and itâs so sloppy and disgusting and he fucking loves it.Â
Joel silently admits that you were right; that he loves your obscenities. He loves your secrets. He loves your defiance. He loves your depravity.Â
He loves that youâre such a fucking slut.Â
âOh, godâ Joelâ!â
He pulls away because if youâre going to moan out his name again itâs going to be because of his cock. He stands abruptly, keeping one hand at the small of your back, and holds your jaw. With your face tilted up towards him, he smirks as he watches tears form in your eyes. âWhatâs wrong, baby?â
âWhy did you stop?â Your voice is so whiny, so hopeless and frantic that it makes his cock twitch. âYou were about to make me cum,â you say.
He kisses you hard, and you moan into his mouth, and Joel runs out of patience. He lifts you up and lays your back flat against the couch. Heâs hovering over you, and his cock is just inches from the place itâs wept to be inside for so many years. Joel rolls it against you, gasping at the feel of your pussy on the underside of his cock. Youâre so wet, and he doesnât know how heâs supposed to last long enough for this to be good for you.Â
But heâs determined. â Joel,â you beg breathlessly, bucking your hips to try and find just the right angle where he slips inside.
âYeah, baby?â He tilts his head slightly, watching as your eyes flicker back and forth between his hips and his predatory grin.Â
âYouâre being mean,â you say. âStop teasing me. Just put it in, Joel, I need it so bad.â
He kisses your forehead. âSâthat right?â
âYes!â
Itâs impossible, he thinks, to hold back his laugh. âYouâre so fucking cute, baby,â he says. âSay please.â
â Please! Please, please pleâ!â
Joel lets out a ragged breath as he pushes into you. Finally, he thinks. Finally, finally, finally. âFuck.â
Itâs so much better than he ever imagined. He sinks in deep until your hips are flush, and even then he pushes your knee back to open you up and get impossibly deeper.Â
âOh my god,â you whimper, and Joel kisses you to swallow up the beautiful sound.Â
You take him like you were made for his cock. And maybe you were, because Joel had never known it could be this fucking good. He knows itâll never be this good again. âYouâre taking it like such a good slut, baby,â he whispers into your ear, tongue sliding up your neck. He pulls his hips back and snaps them forward, the sudden change in force ripping a cry from your throat. âShhh, itâs okay. You can take it.â
With your arms and legs wrapped around him, Joel fucks you slow. Real slow, real deepâheâs touching parts of you you didnât even know existed. You feel so full and pressure coils around your spine.Â
âFeels good, doesnât it?â
âYes, yes yesâ mmmâ!â
He sets a steady pace, hitting that soft spot inside of you every time. He reaches between your bodies and swipes this thumb over your clit. âSay thank you, baby.â
You look right into his eyes, warm and dark and full of devotion. You say, â Thank you, Joel,â and you suddenly remember the same memory he does of that first day.Â
He remembers how pretty you looked on your knees, and you remember how you spent that whole night in your bed touching yourself to him.Â
And now itâs happened, itâs finally happened, and his cock is buried deep inside of you and his thumb is pressing hard against your clit and before he realizes it, your pussy is squeezing him as you cum.Â
Tremors rock through your body, legs shaking and red painted fingernails clawing at his back. He keeps his same steady pace and says, âGive it to me, baby. Good fucking girl, being such a good little slut for me. Thatâs it. Give it to me. There you go.â
Even when your muscles loosen, you keep your limbs wound around him tight. Like even though youâve finished and heâs seconds away from following you there, you still want him as close as possible. It makes him feel tender. âI want you to cum inside me,â you say, and Joelâs cock spasms in your tight pussy. âCum in me, Joel, please âfill me up.â
He shouldnât, he really fucking shouldnât, but he already is, and stars blur his vision. Joel fights through the blindness though, and squeezes your cheeks in his hand. âLook at me,â he orders, and looking at your face makes him cum even harder. You take his thumb into your mouth, soft tongue circling it. And Joel bottoms out inside of you, has the best orgasm of his entire fucking life inside of a girl half his age, but cannot bring himself to regret a single second.
The weight of him over you is heavy but comforting. Itâs perfect, and helps you catch your breath. Joel is panting, and you smell like vanilla and irish spring and cherry chapstick and when his eyes close, he wonders if heâs died and gone to heaven.Â
Your fingers are stroking his spine lazily when the fear creeps in. Do you regret it? Now that itâs out of your system, do you wish youâd never have done it? Never have taunted him, never had let him keep all those secrets, never have come over tonight? The Evil Dead DVD sits on the floor by the front door, abandoned.Â
There couldnât have been much tequila in your mixed drink. You didnât taste like alcohol at all. But still, youâd had someâdo you feel like maybe he took advantage of you?Â
Joel is afraid to look at you. Heâs afraid to open his mouth, to ask if youâre alright, to apologize, to beg for your forgiveness.Â
But then you ask him softly, âIs it okay if I sleep with you tonight?â
He hears the echo of those words, and wonders if you do, too. You wince as he finally sits up and pulls himself out of you. He knows he should say no, but he canât. Instead, he asks, âWill you make pancakes in the morning?â
The sound of your girlish laughter greets him and calms his fears for now. âAnything you want.â
Joel stops at the bathroom on the way to his bed and cleans the sticky mess from between your legs. Itâs then as he realizes how many unhinged decisions heâd made tonight. He doesnât know if youâve slept with other people without protection, doesnât know if youâre on birth control, doesnât know if youâd be willing to take a contraceptive pill in the morning if youâre not, doesnât know anything. The distance, while easier, has taken so much of you from him. And the realization leaves Joel cold.Â
Youâre so young, and heâs so much older than youâŠif the worst happened, would it even be the worst? Do you even want kids?Â
A new fantasy emerges in his brain. The first one since admitting to himself that itâs a little more than just an intrusive thought. Youâre standing on the back porch with a beaming smile, hand over your eyes to block out the bright summer sun while he mows the lawn. Youâre in a pretty pink sundress, and your belly is swollen with Joelâs baby, and his knees buckle as he leads you to his bedroom.Â
You climb in beside him, and he holds you under the blankets a little tighter than you hold him. Emotion chokes him. Joel swallows it down. But then you ask, âWhatâs wrong?â
âI want to keep you,â he confesses. âI want to keep you forever.â
For a moment, itâs quiet. He wonders if maybe you think heâs going to say more, but he doesnât. He doesnât know what else to say. He doesnât have anything else to say.Â
âSo do it,â you whisper.Â
âBut I canât.â
âYou can,â you tell him with a sigh. âYou can, Joel. Thatâs the real secret.â
The words reverberate through him. They clang around in his brain and leave him with something akin to elation. You kiss his jaw, and Joel thinks maybe you might be right. Maybe he will keep you.Â
But for tonight, having you here pressed against him with the promise of pancakes in the morning is enough.
[PART TWO]
[masterlist]
divider by @thecutestgrotto <3
#ao3 fanfic#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller fanfic#joel miller smut#joel tlou#pearlessance#ao3 writer#no outbreak!joel miller#no outbreak au#joel the last of us#age difference#smut#dads best friend#dbf!joel#joel miller fic#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x you#joel miller imagine#our little secret
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Okay hear me out, a lot of Y/N x DCA fics has Y/N replacing Vanessa as the night guard; But what *if* I make them work besties instead? đ
full credits to @way2gosuperrstarr for the technician y/n & night guard vanny brainworms! (I'll be charging you rent later!! đ„đ„đ„ //affectionate)
#Also sun is extra clingy in this fic#He just can't wrap his mind around the fact that his bestest friend has other bestestest friends#Gasp the betrayal#âY/N LOREEEEEEEEEEE đđđâ - Sun in his best matpat impression probably#Oops! All Virus au#fnaf sb#fnaf security breach#fnaf dca#dca au#dca fandom#fnaf vanny#sunnydrop x reader#moondrop x reader#y/n#my art
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Honey love, dark eyes
⥠Chapter one âĄ
Summary: Joel Miller has been your best friend for four years, and your trust in him is as solid as ever. However, things go awry one night after a heated argument, and you find yourself in a position you never thought you'd be in: naked, underneath him, with his eyes devouring you like there's no tomorrow. And when you wake up the next morning, you know it right away, reality piercing your chest; things will never be the same again.
Word count: 9.4K
A/N: Okay, I was planning for the first chapter to be 4K words MAX, but my imagination went crazy with this lol I really hope you like it. I really enjoyed writing this <3 warning: ANGST! don't forget to leave feedback, tell me what you think!
If you want to be on the tag list, let me know too.
You met him on the night of your twenty-second birthday, at the small party Cassie had put together for you in her dimly lit apartment. You hadnât wanted much of a celebration, nothing bigger than a few close friends, and certainly not a group of strangers. But when Brianna swept in, holding hands with a man you didnât know, and introduced him as her boyfriend, you felt a vague flicker of annoyance, the kind that accompanies unmet expectations.
"I thought it was just going to be us," you mumbled to Cassie, catching her in the kitchen as she poured herself another glass of wine.
She looked at you, her cheeks already flushed, eyes bright. "They're a few of my friends, too; theyâre niceâyouâll like them if you give it a chance." She smiled, urging you to relax, as though she could tease you out of your mood. "Itâs your birthday; donât be so sullen."
"I didnât know Brianna was bringing her boyfriend," you said quietly, as Cassie started back to the living room.
She paused, giving you a half-smile over her shoulder. "Neither did I, actually," she admitted, lowering her voice. "Apparently, they've been together for about a month. Sheâs really into him."
And she was. Brianna clung to him all night, her laughter spilling out freely, unrestrained and buoyant from the wine. It wasnât long before someone suggested karaoke, and as voices rang out in the next room, you slipped quietly back into the kitchen, craving a moment of solitude. You were surprised to find Briannaâs boyfriend there, leaning against the counter, scrolling absently through his phone with a glass of water in hand.
He looked up, straightened, and offered you a tentative smile. âOh, hi. Happy birthday,â he said, his voice warm but reserved. âSorry, I didnât get a chance to say it earlierâŠâ
âNo worries,â you replied, your tone reassuring. âThanks.â
He hesitated, as though weighing what to say next. âAre you having a good time?â
You gave a slight shrug. âItâsâŠâ but before you could finish, he cut in with a knowing smile.
âItâs okay. I donât love my birthday either.â His eyes glinted in the soft kitchen light, and you felt a small smile tugging at your own lips.
You looked at him then, really looked at him, allowing yourself the indulgence. âI didnât want to admit it,â you said, feeling the faintest hint of heat rising to your cheeks. âWhat was your name again?â
âJoel,â he answered, his gaze drifting briefly back to his phone. âSorry, Iâm a little on edge tonight. Left my daughter with a new babysitter. I think sheâs having a rough time.â
Your eyebrows rose in mild surprise; you hadnât pegged him as a dad. You moved closer, pouring yourself a glass of orange juice and asked, âHow old is she?â
âFour. Her nameâs Sarah.â He ran a hand through his hair, and you could tell he was tense. âItâs only the second time sheâs been with this sitter, and apparently, sheâs been crying all evening.â
âOh, poor thing,â you murmured sympathetically. âSheâs little. Changes like that must be hard on her.â
He sighed, his gaze drifting to the side as he typed something quickly on his phone. âI should probably get going. Brianna wonât love that idea; weâd planned to stay outâŠâ He paused, eyes flicking up to meet yours, worry etched across his face. âYou think sheâll be too mad?â
âNo,â you assured him, though you knew Brianna wouldnât be pleased. âGo be with your daughter. Sheâs little; she needs you. Brianna will understand.â
A grateful smile spread across Joelâs face, and for the first time, you noticed the faint dimple on his cheek. For a fleeting second, you wanted to reach out, trace it with your thumb.
âThanks,â he murmured, his eyes lingering on you in a way that felt unintentional, yet steady. âI hope your night gets better once karaoke is over,â he added with a quiet laugh. "Wish me luck."
You chuckled, meeting his gaze. âGood luck, Joel.â
He left with that same soft smile, and you watched him go, his warm brown eyes leaving an odd impression, like an unclaimed memory. And, as expected, Brianna didnât understand. She spent the rest of the night sulking, casting sharp words at Joel through her bitterness.
âYou knew he had a daughter when you got with him, this was bound to happen at some point,â Cassie told her, fed up with the other's complaints.
You didn't hear the answer, as you were distracted by watching the colorful pictures someone had put on the television.
You heard nothing more from Joel for a couple of weeks, until Cassie blurted out the gossip one morning while you were having lunch at her house.
âHe broke up with her,â she began to tell you. âHe told her she wasn't being empathetic and that he couldn't drop everything to party with her as if they had no responsibilities.â
It was no surprise. Brianna was a woman who lived at night; she was twenty-three years old and enjoyed it with the freedom that was rightfully hers. You couldn't blame her for wanting to have fun with her boyfriend. But Joel lived a very different reality than she did; at twenty-eight, he had a daughter to take care of, routines to follow, and a lot of work to do.
Although you thought it would take her longer to get over him, it wasn't long before she met a guy at her gym and got into it with him, outgrowing Joel in a matter of days. But for some reason, Joelâs warm, steady gaze stayed with you, like a whisper that hadnât fully faded.
Years passed quietly, slipping through your fingers like sand until, suddenly, it was your twenty-sixth birthday. This time, the scene was different: youâd moved into your own place just two days earlier, and there was little thought of celebrating. Instead, the weekend found you alone, arranging your things and attempting to bring order to the chaos of a new home.
It was a crisp Saturday morning, and you stood in your front yard with a glass of fresh-squeezed orange juice in hand, humming along to some eighties tune drifting in from the living room. The songâone of those upbeat ones that made even housework feel lightâhad lifted your spirits, and you moved rhythmically as you pushed plastic flowers into the dirt along the front path, sending little puffs of air to make the petals flutter.
You were lost in your task when you heard soft footsteps behind you, instinctively making you turn.
âOh, hello,â you said, quickly masking the slight surprise the girlâs sudden appearance had given you.
She looked at you with wide, curious eyes, seemingly unfazed by her solo adventure.
âHi. Whatâs your name? Do you live here?â she asked, her gaze shifting from your face to the flowers in your hands.
Glancing around for any sign of her parents, you noted her relaxed stance, like sheâd been coming here all her life. Smiling, you nodded and gave her your name. âYep, I just moved in.â
She looked unimpressed. âThis house was empty for a while. I didnât like the kid who lived here before. He was a pain in the assââ
âSarah!â came a sharp voice from behind, making you jump slightly. Heavy footsteps approached, and you squinted against the sun to see a figure striding toward you, his features obscured by the bright morning light.
When he stepped closer, his face came into focus, and your breath caught. You knew him.
âSarah, you canât just leave the house like that,â he said sternly, a furrow in his brow, his tone more parental than reproachful.
He turned to you, and the scowl softened as recognition dawned.
âJoel,â you murmured, the name slipping out before you even meant to say it aloud.
His expression shifted into a surprised smile, and that was all it took to break the ice between you. You explained that youâd just moved in and were still settling. Joel offered to help with anything you needed, including taking a look around the house to ensure everything was in order. He formally introduced you to Sarah, now eight years old, who had nearly scared him to death by sneaking out. She had his same lively spark in her eyes, a brightness that seemed familiar.
That evening, Sarah invited you to dinner with them, leaving Joel with little choice but to agree. And one dinner became many, as evenings blurred into weekends, and you found Joelâs presence in your life weaving into something inseparable from your routine. He started popping by to help with small projects, fixing kitchen cabinets or adjusting the wobbly front steps, visits stretching into movie marathons or lazy conversations with cold beer in hand. Days flowed into evenings of chatting over the meals you cooked to share with Sarah, and sometimes her uncle Tommy. Though Joel claimed he was no cook, his barbecues were legendary, and you couldnât deny you looked forward to them most of all. And soon enough, he was there for everything, from driving you to doctorâs appointments to accompanying you on those grocery runs he pretended to hate. He even started showing up early on days he knew youâd need a ride. Over time, he became the best friend youâd ever had, a safe place, someone who felt like family. With everyone else scatteredâCassie overseas, old friends moved awayâJoel became your rock.
It wasnât something you dared to admit to yourself often, but you couldnât imagine your life without him. And maybe thatâs why you never allowed yourself to voice those little fleeting thoughts, the ones that flitted through your mind every now and then: how safe you felt whenever he threw his arm around your shoulders, or how good he looked reclining on his couch after a long day. Or how perfect it felt when the three of youâSarah dozing on his lap, you leaning into his shoulderâsat together in the warm silence of a Sunday afternoon. There was an ache, too, a quiet pang whenever he mentioned another woman. Thankfully, that was rare; Joel once told you, with a shrug, that he âwasnât really looking for that sort of thing.â
Sometimes, you watched him carefully as you talked about your own dates, hoping to catch a glimmer of jealousy in his gaze, some subtle cue that maybe he felt the same way. But there was never anything you wanted to see, and you always felt silly for looking. So, you buried it all. The risk of ruining things with Joel wasnât worth the confession.
One afternoon, however, your emotions almost escaped your eyes when, while preparing Joel's birthday cake, Sarah dropped a piece of news that caught you off guard. She told you, with her usual nonchalance, that Joel had gone out the night before with someone new.
âYeah, itâs like⊠the third time theyâve gone out,â Sarah mentioned while spreading cream on the sponge cake. âI donât know her name or anything, just that he met her in line at the bank,â a laugh choked in her throat, amused at imagining her father flirting with some woman in a public space.
You forced a smile, laughing along like it was funny.
"And who stayed with you last night?â you asked, trying to keep your tone casual.
Not that Sarah was necessarily a baby; she was already twelve and extremely independent. But Joel never left her alone if he went out for the night, he knew how much she loved spending time with you watching movies and eating junk food. Then, when he arrived, you would pester him with gossipy questions and he would pretend to get angry and then answer every one of them.
âUncle Tommy," she said, eyeing her work with satisfaction. âWe had fun, but I kinda wished youâd come too. Hey, what do you think?â she fingered the cream neatly arranged with the angled knife.
âIt's perfect,â you smiled at her, not waiting too long to ask the question you wanted so badly. âWhy didn't you call me then?â
Sarah started sprinkling colorful sprinkles on top of the cream and looked at you for a second when she noticed the tone in your voice at the last word. She didn't seem to think much of it.
âYou were busy, weren't you? Dad said you had something to do.â
Her answer hit you like a small weight to the chest. Joel had purposefully left you out. Heâd even made an excuse for Sarahâs benefit. So, there had been three datesâthree times heâd kept this woman a secret. A small knot formed in your stomach as you forced yourself to smile, still watching Sarah as she concentrated on the last of the sprinkles.
In the kitchen, you were running your hand through the steam from the beef stew on the stoveâJoelâs favoriteâwhen the door opened. His footsteps grew louder, approaching, and you nervously adjusted the dress youâd chosen, one you knew he liked, though heâd never said it. It was your favorite too, a cream-colored sundress with delicate shoulder ties.
Sarah sprang forward, covering his eyes. âDonât look, the tableâs not ready.â
You hurried to set the glasses in their places, your hands a little shaky as you moved, hoping he wouldnât notice the flush creeping up your cheeks.
âI donât need to see itâI can smell it, and it smells incredible,â Joel grinned beneath Sarahâs tiny hands, which sheâd plastered over his eyes, half to keep him from sneaking a glance, half just because she could.
âToo bad you donât smell incredible,â Sarah retorted with a smirk, wrinkling her nose. "Go take a shower!"
You laughed, catching Joelâs raised brow at her.
âYouâve got five minutes,â you said, placing the lid on the simmering pot.
Joel snorted, brushing Sarahâs hands away from his face.
âThatâs the smell of a hardworking man,â he replied, feigning offense as he turned for the stairs. âYâall oughtta know.â
*
Later, the three of you sat around the table, and Joel took his first bite of the stew, eyes widening, a kind of bliss washing over his face. He tossed his head back and groaned.
âSweet Glory,â he mumbled, closing his eyes. âThank you for this.â
âOh, come on,â you teased, though part of you couldnât help but feel a pang of something between irritation and flattery. âYou say that every time I cook for you.â
He shook his head, smiling as he chewed, then spoke softly, his gaze slipping downward.
âIâm not exaggeratingâI love everything you do.â A pause, and then a quick, awkward clarification. âI mean, everything you cook.â
The clarification was like a line drawn in the sand, a boundary etched by his voice alone.
You smiled weakly and inwardly thankful when Sarah spoke, telling you about something that had happened at her school that week and distracting you from the question that was spellbinding your tongue. You were dying to ask it, to look him in the eye and ask: who did you go out with last night? Why didn't you tell me? Is it someone I know? Is that it?... But you didn't, you stayed quiet and participated in the pleasant conversation, celebrating his birthday as he deserved. After all, no matter how much it angered you that he kept things from you, it was still his special day.
After dinner, Sarah forced Joel to sit in front of his cake, two lit number candles glowing in front of him. You turned out the lights, watching as the light from the flames reflected beautifully in your best friend's dark pupils.
Joel was wearing a black T-shirt and dark jeans, his hair was still barely damp from the shower he'd taken before, and his sun-kissed tan face looked smooth, decorated by the beard and mustache you loved so much. Behind him, his shadow vibrated and spread across the wall with grandeur.
âMake a wish!â Sarah cheered, bouncing with excitement as she placed her small hands on his shoulders.
Joel smiled, closed his eyes, and blew out the candles. In the dimness, you leaned in and kissed his cheek softly.
âHappy birthday, old man,â you whispered, your hand resting gently on his neck.
He reached for your hand, pressing a warm, lingering kiss into your palm. âIâm not that old,â he muttered with a mock frown.
Sarah giggled, holding a knife to cut the cake and licking a dab of frosting from her thumb. âYouâll be forty in four years,â she teased, catching your amused expression.
Joel scoffed, scratching his stomach as he stood back up, turning to you with a smile that made you forget, just for a moment, all the questions you were holding back. There was only Joel, his rumbling laugh, Sarahâs delighted giggles. It felt like home.
Sarah gave him his gift first: a copy of Curtis and Viper 2 with the deleted scenes and a mystery box. When he opened it, a smile formed on his lips.
He pulled out a weathered wristwatch, broken for months, now polished and repaired.
âI took it in to be fixed. Do you like it?â Sarah asked, eyes wide with anticipation.
Joel nodded, eyes softening as he extended his wrist for her to put it on. âItâs perfect, baby.â
âLet's watch the movie later,â Sarah said. âYou can't fall asleep.â
âLet's see which one of us falls asleep first,â you joked, and you were right. Joel had been working all afternoon and Sarah had been yawning for hours.
You turned and picked up the box resting beside your feet, handing it to him. When he opened it, Joel pulled out a black cloth garment and a paper envelope. He tugged at the cloth, revealing a thick, soft jacket. He read the label and a smile appeared on his lips.
âI saw it and thought of you,â you said, mimicking his gesture.
âHow much did you pay for this?â
âDon't worry about it, it had to be yours,â you noted as you stood up and took it from his hand. âHere, stand up. Let's see how it fits you.â
âAnd what if it doesn't fit? Do we have to travel to Rome to exchange it?â
You laughed, then helped him slide it over his shoulders, a comfortable, familiar movement.
âI know you by heart, I couldn't be wrong.â
âSo?â he asked, smiling coquettishly. Your stomach tingled and you decided to ignore it.
âLookinâ good, Dad,â Sarah chimed in, her innocent smile lighting up the moment. âBet someone special will love it, too.â
Joel smiled weakly, as if he was trying to tell her something with his eyes, and for a second you hated the thought of your gift being enjoyed by someone else. You imagined him getting ready to go out with her -whoever she was-, running his hand through his hair and perfuming his neck as he did from time to time whenever he went out with someone. You knew that perfume perfectly, you'd recognize it anywhere, though you were sure it wouldn't smell the same on anyone else. Joel added his own scent to it, and you loved it.
âOkay, now, open the envelope,â you urged, your voice unintentionally sharper than you meant.
Joel sat back down and opened the blue paper envelope. He read the note carefully and when he looked up, you and Sarah were looking at him excitedly.
âSunshine, did you pay for this?â he asked you, a soft disbelief in his tone.
Inside were three plane tickets. Sarah had helped you pick the destinationâsomewhere none of you had been but would love.
When you nodded, he let out a soft sigh. âLet me cover part of it.â
You groaned, rolling your eyes. âItâs my birthday gift to you, Joel. Itâs all settled. You need a vacation, and we certainly do too, don't we?â
âThat's right,â Sarah confirmed, smiling complicitly.
He sighed, shaking his head. âYouâre too good to me.â
But he smiled, tucking the tickets back into the envelope.
Time with Joel and Sarah was easy. When you were with them, hours slipped away, and the heaviness of everything else seemed to dissolve. You felt at home, and sometimes it left you wondering about Sarahâs mother, about how anyone could have left them. Didnât she see how extraordinary they were? Didnât she realize what sheâd lost?
You thought about this as you relaxed on the couch beside Joel, Sarah curled up with her head on your shoulder. Her breathing had slowed, and you smiled, realizing sheâd fallen asleep. Three glasses sat on the coffee table: the wine Joel had opened just before dinnerâa bottle youâd brought back from your last trip to Italyâand Sarahâs lemon soda. Joel snorted softly, glancing at his daughter with a smirk, then leaned over and pressed a kiss to her forehead.
âFallen soldier,â he whispered, smiling.
You laughed, brushing a hand over Sarahâs hair. âSheâs tired. She was up all afternoon making your cake, you know? Tried the cream three times before she got it right.â
Joel sighed, an apologetic note in his voice. âI know, sorry I was late. I know she wanted me here sooner.â
Curtis and Viper 2Â was halfway through on the TV, forgotten in the background. Joel straightened, signaling heâd take Sarah to bed, and you shifted to make room as he lifted her, carrying her toward the stairs. You watched him disappear down the hallway, and as the house fell into a quiet lull, that familiar disappointment stirred in your chest. Now, without Sarahâs chatter, youâd have to keep pretending that nothing was wrong.
You took a long sip of your wine, finishing off the glass just as Joel returned. He sat down heavily beside you, causing the cushions to sink as he let out a sigh, rubbing a hand over his eyes before giving you a grateful look.
âThanks for today, I had a great time. Sarah was very happy,â he said quietly, a warm smile appearing on his lips.
âI'm glad, hun. Although the credit goes to her, I just made dinner.â
âDoesnât matter. You helped her, and Iâm grateful. I mean that. For today, and for⊠all these years.â His voice softened, almost reverent.
âYou donât have to thank me,â you whispered, feeling your pulse pick up as he leaned closer, his brown eyes unreadable but soft. âYouâre my family, both of you. Really, Iâm the one who owes you thanks.â
He shook his head and leaned back, taking another sip of his wine.
âNot at all,â he replied, leaning back again.
You watched him for a moment, turning the weight of your question over in your mind. If you said something, heâd make an excuse. If you kept silent, the doubt would eat at you. You tried to fix your gaze on the TV, on anything other than his profile in the dim room. But the words slipped out of your mouth before you could stop yourself.
âSo, what did you do last night?â
He tensed beside you, so subtly that only you couldâve noticed. âWhat?â
You tried to keep your tone even, hoping you didnât sound like youâd spent all day thinking about it. âI just⊠didnât see your truck out there, thought maybe you were gone or something.â It was a lie; you had fallen asleep on your couch last night, you hadn't even noticed Joel was gone.
Joel seemed to measure his words carefully. âOh. Yeah⊠I just went out for a beer with Tommy,â he answered, his tone a little too casual.
Heat crept up your face, disbelief taking root. He really was holding out on you for some reason, wasn't he? The man was lying to you, and not very cleverly. Tommy had been with Sarah, what if you had seen him, hadn't he thought of that? Apparently not.Â
It took a moment before you could bring yourself to say anything, watching as he glanced at you with an uneasy smile, waiting for you to believe him.
âJoel,â you murmured, not quite able to keep the accusation out of your voice. âYouâre lying to me.â
He gave a nervous laugh, rubbing the back of his neck, but you didnât let him off so easily. Before he could say anything, you spoke again.
âTommy was with Sarah last night, here,â you pointed out, your voice firmer this time. His silence told you everything, his face drawn and uncertain as he realized youâd caught him.
After a long pause, he looked down, his voice unusually flat. âAlright, yeah. I know.â
The admission was so casual it took you by surprise, but you shook your head, feeling the ache of frustration and betrayal creep in.
âWhy would you lie to me?â you pressed. âWeâre friends. Why wouldnât you tell me youâre seeing someone?â
Joel sighed, avoiding your gaze, his eyes instead locked somewhere in the distance. âItâs⊠itâs nothing serious,â he mumbled. âJust getting to know her. Don't make such a fuss out of it.â
âWhat? what you're saying doesn't make sense. Youâve kept it hidden, avoided every chance to be honest about it. Why?â you asked, trying not to let the hurt seep into your voice.
âItâs not like that,â he insisted, but his voice sounded unsure.
âSo if I call Tommy right now, heâll tell me the truth? Or did you ask him to keep this from me too?â
Finally, he met your gaze, his eyes scanning your face, reading the frustration and hurt youâd tried to keep buried. You could see it in his eyes, that familiar tug of defiance, a flash of something deeper than guilt or secrecy.
âWhat if I did?â His voice was almost philosophical, his gaze intense and challenging. âThis is my private life. I donât have to explain myself to anyone, not even you. Do I?â
You drew in a sharp breath. His words struck like a slap, but you steadied yourself. âYouâre right, Joel. You donât owe me explanations. But you donât have to lie to me, either.â You looked down, feeling your voice start to waver. âYouâve never hidden your relationships from me before.â
He sighed, scrubbing his hands over his face and slumping back against the couch.
After a few seconds, he finally looked at you, a look of exasperation crossing his face.
âBecause of this.â He gestured between you, his tone gentle but firm. âThis reaction, right here, is exactly why I didnât tell you.â
What Joel was saying didnât make sense. Your frustration wasnât over him seeing someone else; it was something else entirely, something more fundamental.
âOh, just stop,â you snapped, voice sharp. âIâm not mad because youâre dating someone, Joel. Iâm mad that you lied to me. Theyâre two completely different things.â
He took a breath, settling back on the couch, and turned to face you, a guarded expression crossing his face. âNo, itâs always the same thing. Remember the last time I was seeing someone?â
And you did, briefly. A year ago, one of his friends had introduced him to his cousinâa woman who had just moved to town. She was polite enough, but her smiles had a brittle quality to them, and when she met Sarah, her warmth never extended beyond a single, dismissive greeting. The indifference was obvious, at least to you, and maybe youâd let that show a little too openly. Joel had caught on quickly, and after that, things with her fizzled out.
âThat was different,â you argued, exasperated. âShe wasnât nice, Joel. She had zero interest in Sarah.â
He gave a bitter, half-smile. âMaybe, but it wasnât your job to manage that. I can handle my own relationships. But you alwaysââ he paused, thumping his chest with a finger, âyou always step in. Always get defensive.â
âThatâs not true!â Your voice rose as anger crept in, heating your face. âYouâre just making excuses. Date whoever you want, Joel, I donât care. But donât lie to me, donât insult me with these flimsy excuses. Or if youâre going to lie, at least make it convincing.â
He clenched his jaw, his gaze hardening, something fierce sparking in his eyes. âAre you sure about that?â he asked, his voice low and measured, the words hanging between you like a dare.
âSure about what?â Your brow creased in confusion, the pulse in your chest picking up, a flurry of anger and⊠something else you couldnât place, mingling with the haze of the wine.
His eyes narrowed, holding yours, unflinching. âThat you donât care. Thatâs what this is about, isnât it? Because I know you, i know you to well to know youâre just jealous.â
Jealous. He thought you were jealous.
He had missed the point completely. Your feelings for him were complex, that much was true. But you had learned, or thought you had learned, to carry them quietly. Your friendship with him had come to feel like a sturdy house you could live inside without having to ask too much of it. Having him in your life was enough.
But now, you felt that house shift, cracks spreading through the walls. His inability to trust you hurt more deeply than youâd expected. The openness youâd once trusted was fracturing. You felt the sting of tears prick at your eyes, the words heâd thrown out so casually cutting to the quick.
âFuck you, Joel,â you muttered, standing abruptly, storming to the door and slamming it shut behind you. You barely heard him call your name as you left, fury driving you down the front steps, the cool night air biting at your cheeks.
Honestly, he could go fuck himself.
Just as your hand reached your front door, his footsteps closed in behind you, his strides fast enough to catch up. You tried to close the door before he could reach you, but his hand caught it just in time, his voice heavy with irritation.
âJust go away, Joel,â you said, barely glancing at him. âI donât want to see you again.â
âThatâs not true, and you know it.â His voice was calm, almost pleading.
You stepped back, reluctantly letting him into the foyer. Heâd have come in anyway.
âI mean it, God. Go home,â you insisted, your voice wavering, betraying the anger mixed with something else.
He shook his head, taking a few steps closer, his jaw tight. âCan we just talk?â
âTalk?â you repeated incredulously. âTalk about what? About how wrong you are?â
He didnât flinch, but his eyes darkened. âDonât act like what I said was crazy,â he said, voice steady but a little sharper now.
You scoffed, throwing your hands up. âOh, so now Iâm jealous, is that it? Then, by your logic, you mustâve been jealous too, right? Like last month, when Travis asked me out. Because if thatâs the case, then weâre having the same conversation, arenât we?â
Joel clicked his tongue, tilting his head with an exaggerated sigh. âNo, Travis is just a jerk. And I donât like him, plain and simple.â
Travis Dunn, your neighbor, had moved in a few months after you did. Handsome, tall, and friendly, everyone on the street adored himâeveryone except Joel. He couldnât seem to stand him, though Travis was always polite to him.
Last month, when Travis had asked you out, Joel had practically laughed in your face when you told him about it, muttering something dismissive as if the very idea was absurd. Youâd told Travis you were busy, though deep down you knew the real reason you hadnât accepted was because of Joelâs disapproval.
You shook your head, exasperated. âTravis isnât a jerk, Joel, you just donât like him. Heâs nice, honestly, much nicer than some people, if weâre being honest here. Everyone loves him; youâre the only one who has a problem with him.â
âThen everyoneâs as much of an idiot as he is, sunshine.â
âOh, really? Or maybe⊠youâre jealous of him?â Your tone was teasing, but you felt the shift as soon as you said it.
Joelâs mouth twitched in a half-smile, but the humor didnât reach his eyes. He ran his tongue over his lips, shaking his head slowly, twice.
âDonât turn this on me,â he said. âThis isnât about Travis or me.â
âNo?â you shot back, voice edged with challenge. âSo if I go tomorrow and say yes to him, that wouldnât bother you at all, right?â
He stepped closer to you, his eyes dark with something youâd never seen in him before. The air seemed to thicken, his presence so intense it felt as though it wrapped around you. He leaned in, his face close enough that his words brushed your skin.
âYou can do whatever you want, baby. Itâs your fucking life.â
âAnd you can do whatever you want too, Joel. Thatâs the fucking point!â you nearly shouted, hands pushing against his shoulders, shoving him away. âI donât care what you do! Itâs already clear you donât get it, you donât get anything, ANYTHING!â
Joel staggered back for a split second, but it wasnât long before he closed the distance again, though he didnât get as close this time.
His voice was lower, a thread of something hard in his tone. âIf youâre so insulted by the idea of being jealous, maybe thatâs something for you to think about. Ever thought of doing a little introspection?â
âAre you drunk, Joel?â you asked, eyes narrowed, softening your voice a fraction. The argument was exhausting you, and the anger left you feeling hollow.
He laughed, an odd, choked sound. âOh, c'mon, you know one bottle of wine ain't enough to get me drunk.â
âYeah, but youâre tired, and youâre not exactly young, Joel,â you said, brushing past him, his gaze glued to you the entire time. âAlcohol hits you differently now. Just go home, leave me alone.â
âFine. Iâll leave you alone, and maybe then you can run across the street and fuck Travis Dunn, if you want it so badly,â he shot back, impatience tinging his voice as he turned toward the still-open door.
The words hit you like a slap. You froze for a moment, the anger washing over you in a wave. Before you could think twice, you rushed up to him, gripping his arm tightly to force him to turn and look at you.
âWhat the hell did you just say, Joel?â you hissed, grabbing his shirt, fingers bunching in the fabric as you backed him up until his shoulders hit the wall by the door. âGo on, say it again!â
Your breaths came fast, chest rising and falling as the rush of anger pushed tears to your eyes. You couldnât believe heâd actually spoken to you like that, cutting right through to something raw and vulnerable. Heâd never spoken to you like that before. Maybe he was a little drunk, or maybe he was losing his mind.
But there was no softness in his gaze, no hint of the Joel you knew. His stare was sharp, almost wild with something simmering underneath, something you didnât understand. To you, this whole argument made no sense, at least not his reaction.
Joelâs grip on your wrist was firm, almost grounding, as he pulled you closer, pressing your palm against his chest. âI canât stand that asshole, but go ahead and fuck him if you want,â he spat, voice laced with frustration. âGo fuck the whole neighborhood while youâre at it. I really donât care anymore.â
His words were harsh, designed to cut, but they only drew a laugh from youâsharp and derisive. A tear slipped down your cheek, uninvited.
âWhat, did you ever care?â you asked, your voice trembling on the last syllable, thick with emotion.
But Joel didnât respond, and the silence ignited a fire in you, something that swirled beneath the surface, ready to boil over.
âDo you know why weâre friends, Joel?â Your pulse quickened, each beat like a drum in your ears. âBecause it just works between us. There are no ulterior motives. You know why? Because I donât like you like that. Youâre not even my type, and you never will be. And no, Iâm not jealous that youâre dating some woman youâll probably dump in less than a month, so get the fuck over it and leave me the fuck alone!â
You watched as his gaze flickered between your eyes, uncertainty warring with something darker. Suddenly, with an unexpected strength, Joel tightened his grip on your wrist and pushed you back hard against the wall. The impact knocked the breath from your lungs, leaving you gasping as your back hit the unforgiving surface.
His expression had transformed, those deep, dark eyes piercing you like arrows. His breath quickened, crashing against your face, and you could feel your lower lip tremble as he pressed even closer, pinning you against the wall.
âYou donât know how to lie,â he murmured, his lips almost brushing against your cheek.
The sensation was unbearable; his body pressed against yours, heat radiating off him and melting you inside. You could feel the edge of something primal, something that could tip either way. But suddenly, clarity surged through you. With a burst of strength, you pushed him away, breaking free from his grasp, forcing him to pull back just enough for you to gasp for air.
But the distance felt worse. In his eyes, you recognized something youâd never seen beforeâdesire, raw and unfiltered. It clawed at you, igniting an inexplicable need. A sigh escaped your lips, and like a match struck in a dark room, it was enough to set off an explosion. In an instant, Joel lunged at you, and you found yourself wrapped around him, mouths colliding in a desperate kiss filled with moans and the urgency of your racing hearts.
With a loud thud, Joel kicked the front door shut, his hands moving feverishly down your body, fingers skimming your thighs, slipping beneath your dress. He caressed your skin before squeezing your ass hard, drawing a moan from your lips that echoed in the small space between you. You clung to him tighter, his hands fitting around you as if they were made for this very moment.
He pulled back for a breath, the sound wet and chaotic against the walls of your home, and then his lips descended down your neck, unraveling what little sanity you had left. A moan rumbled in his throat as your hands tangled in his hair, tugging gently to tilt your head back, giving him better access to the tender spot just below your ear, your blood pulsing beneath his hungry mouth.
Joel seemed to want to devour you whole; his hands roamed erratically, trembling as his mouth kissed and bit your jaw, pressing your bodies together in a way that felt impossibly intimate. When you lifted your right leg and wrapped it around his side, he was quick to respond, hands securing your thighs, lifting you effortlessly onto his hips, burying his face against your chest.
Another moan escaped you, and he pulled you down just enough to find your lips again. âJoel,â you whispered, breathless as you parted from him, pressing your forehead against his, eyes searching his.
âTell me to stop and I will,â he said, his voice low, almost broken, each word laced with a vulnerability youâd never heard from him before. âDo you want me to stop?â
âNo,â you replied in a small, desperate cry, feeling the heat radiating from him, the thin fabric of your underwear igniting a fire deep within you.
You were dying of thirst, and he had just asked you if you would refuse a sip of water. Was he mad? You wanted to drink it all.Â
No sooner had you answered than Joel pulled you off the wall, striding toward the stairs with a confident grace. You lowered your legs cautiously, meeting his lips again in a frantic, wet kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth with urgency.
You walked to your room with the agility of one who knows where to step, and once inside, you grabbed the shirt you had angrily grabbed earlier and lifted it up his body in a desperate attempt to rip it off. Joel raised his arms, letting the fabric pass over both of you and then fall to the floor, and as quickly as your hands returned to his chest, he kissed your neck again, desperate, pressing his fingers into the tender flesh of your waist, seeking a physically impossible closeness.Â
His hands found your thighs once more, fingers gripping and kneading with a measured intensity that sent electric shivers through you. As he moved lower, his fingertips brushed the thin fabric of your underwear, inching closer to where you ached for him, squeezing you tighter as if to draw you in.
In a single, decisive motion, he grasped the hem of your dress and pulled it upward, the fabric sliding along your skin as he lifted it away, tossing it aside with a casual disregard that only heightened the tension in the air. He took a step back, his gaze roaming over you, from the soft curve of your face down to the tips of your toes, a look of hunger that felt almost consuming.
You weren't wearing a bra (your dress didn't require it) and your breasts fell beautifully in front of him, hard nipples and soft skin. Your chest flushed with warmth, a rosy hue creeping into your cheeks as you swallowed hard, feeling vulnerable yet exhilarated when he stepped closer.
âIâve always loved that dress,â he said, his voice trembling with an emotion that was both reverent and raw.
âI know,â you replied, a smile curling at the corners of your lips, the moment igniting an intimacy that made your heart race.
His eyes swept down your body again, glittering with an unmistakable lust, and when he closed the distance, standing right before you, your breath caught in your throat.
His hands slid around your waist, firm yet tender, pulling you into him with a deftness that sent a thrill coursing through you. In one seamless motion, he lifted you off the ground, your feet barely grazing the floor as you instinctively stood on your tiptoes, the world narrowing to just the two of you.
Joelâs eyes darkened with a hunger that left you breathless, and he leaned in, his lips finding one of your breasts with a soft kiss that felt both electrifying and reverent. The warmth of his mouth sent a rush of heat through your body, and before you could gather your thoughts, he nipped your nipple gently, a teasing bite that sent chills racing across your skin.
His teeth grazed you just enough to elicit a gasp, a shuddering reaction that echoed in the space between you. But he didnât linger on the sharpness of that moment; he quickly replaced the sensation with the soothing warmth of his lips, enveloping you entirely.
He sank to one knee, lowering himself until his lips brushed your stomach, the warm sensation sending ripples of desire coursing through you. His face lingered dangerously close to where you needed him most.
Joel placed his hands on your hips, fingers gripping the elastic of your underwear, his gaze locking onto yours for a moment that stretched into eternity before he slowly began to lower it, the fabric sliding down your legs and pooling at your feet. You felt his breath hitch at the sight of your now bare center, the anticipation thickening the air between you as he inched closer, finally brushing his lips against your mons pubis.
âPrecious,â he murmured, and the warmth of his breath washed over you like a caress, drawing a small, needy moan from your lips. His hands parted your legs slightly, his fingers digging into your thighs, holding you firmly in place.
You cupped his face gently, as if afraid you might break him, and then, without warning, Joel licked his lips and plunged forward, his mouth connecting with you in a surprise that made your eyes flutter shut. You tangled your fingers in his hair, tugging him closer as he devoured you, his tongue working its magic as he sucked and kissed you whole, with an urgency that left you breathless.
He growled into you, the sound reverberating through your body, and you felt weakness seep into your legs, trembling under the weight of his relentless attention. Joel was eating you like a hungry man, tasting you and soaking in your juices with a fervor that felt primal, kissing you as if his life depended on it.
âFuck,â you gasped, feeling every muscle in your body tighten as a building pressure coiled inside you.
He pulled away for just a moment, his eyes darkened with lust, a playful smile creeping onto his lips before he returned to you, closing his mouth around your clit, sucking and licking with a skill that made your head spin.
âAhâJoel, Iâm going toâIâm going toââ You struggled to articulate the intensity of what was building within you, your words stumbling over the tide of pleasure washing over you.
His voice vibrated through you, trailing off into a soft, âMhm.â
You pulled at his hair, tugging harder as a wrenching moan escaped your throat. The world around you faded as his movements grew more frantic, his tongue flicking at you with a desperate fervor. One of his hands released your thigh, and a low groan escaped his lips as his finger found your entrance, sliding inside with an ease that made you gasp.
âFuck me, youâre so wet,â he murmured, pausing for a moment to take in the sight of youâyour cheeks flushed, eyes sparkling with lust. A satisfied smile broke across his face, and you thought he had never looked so gorgeous.
From your point of view, he looked beautiful. His bright eyes worshipped you intently, his mouth and mustache glistened bathed in you, his hair tossed by your hands mingled in all directions. Joel Miller had never looked so good.
Another finger joined the first, and you closed your eyes, surrendering to the sensation as he curled them just right, hitting that sweet spot that made you gasp for air. You gripped his hair again, pulling him closer, and he let out a throaty laugh, clearly reveling in the sight of you completely undone.
You felt his mouth on you again, the warmth of his lips kissing and sucking with an insatiable hunger that left you breathless. The sound of it was utterly obscene, echoing around the room like a carnal symphony, and it drove you to the brink of madness, your mind spinning in a dizzying haze of pleasure.
His movements grew more intense, a rhythm building that sent waves of ecstasy rippling through your body. You felt yourself teetering on the edge, your hips moving in desperate undulations, surrendering to the climax that Joel savored with unrelenting focus. Your fingers clenched around him, digging in perhaps a bit too hard, but he welcomed it, desperate to drink in every last drop of what you were offering, to savor you whole.
With a low grunt, he squeezed your hips before pulling away, the wet sound of his departure from you hanging heavy in the air. You barely registered his rise from the floor, lost in the aftershocks of pleasure, your eyes still closed as the vibrations coursed through you. It wasnât until his hands gripped your waist that you finally blinked awake, lifting your eyelids to find him gazing down at you, his face mere inches from yours.
He leaned in, capturing your mouth again, a kiss that was both desperate and tender, igniting a fire deep within you. You could taste yourself on his tongue.
Your hands found their way around his neck, pulling him closer as you melted into the kiss. As the intensity built, you let your fingers drift down his chest, trailing lightly until they found the leather of his belt, the sensation sending shivers through you as you tugged him closer.
Joel vibrated against you, a low growl escaping as he nipped at your lower lip while you fumbled with his steel buckle, the sound of it being released becoming your new favorite melody. You unzipped his pants, your heart racing as you slipped your hand inside, finally touching him for the first time.
Your pulse quickened as you wrapped your fingers around him, feeling the heat radiating from his velvet soft skin; big, hot and throbbing in your palm. A rush of desire flooded you, and you pulled away from his lips, dropping to your knees before him, your eyes wide as you took in his form.Â
There he stood, beautiful and swollen with need, and your mouth watered at the sight. You cupped him gently, drawing him closer to your lips, placing a soft kiss on the tip. Joel closed his eyes at the sensation, surrendering to the moment completely, and you traced your tongue over him, tasting the salty sweetness of his pre cum that made your insides tighten with longing.
With a hint of effort, you attempted to take him fully into your mouth, but he was too large, stretching you in ways you hadnât expected. Joel lowered his gaze to you, his fingers caressing your jaw as you struggled to adjust.
âSlow, baby,â he urged, his voice silky yet strained, and it sent another rush of need through you. "I know you can do it."
You matched your hand to your mouth, stroking him where you couldnât quite reach, while your other hand gently caressed his balls, moving in a synchronized rhythm. Joel tensed beneath your touch, his fingers shifting from your face to tangle in your hair, guiding you as he reveled in the pleasure you were giving him.
The sounds in the room became a symphony of pleasure, every moan and gasp echoing off the walls, and you watched as Joel's pleasure climbed. The image was enough to drive him over the edge; your pink, swollen lips covered him and his cock glistened with your saliva, dripping from your chin with every move you made. Your teary eyes looked up at him desirously, and he could take no more; his gaze was filled with a primal hunger that threatened to unravel him. He finally withdrew from your mouth with great reluctance when he felt his stomach tighten, a low complaint escaping your throat in protest.
His breathing was heavy, and a flush colored his cheeks as he lifted you effortlessly, holding you at the waist, his lips finding yours in a heated kiss. In one swift motion, he laid you back onto the bed, the mattress dipping under his weight as he moved closer; Joel kneeling and settling between your legs which you instinctively opened for him.Â
You needed him, you needed him to fill you whole. You had never needed anything as much as you needed him at that moment. And as if he was reading your thoughts - or maybe he needed you as much as you needed him - he leaned in, taking your mouth with his once more, his moans blending with yours as he lost himself in you.
Your hands tangled in his hair, pulling him closer as he deepened the kiss, the taste of him igniting a fire in your veins. You felt him positioning himself at your entrance, his heat pulsing against you, and an intense sigh shot through your chest as Joel entered you in one thrust, burning and stretching you around him.Â
âOh God,â he groaned, burying his face into the crook of your neck, the warmth of his breath sending shivers down your spine. His right hand traveled to your left leg, lifting it and resting it high on his shoulder, while without hesitation, his other hand mirrored the movement with your right leg, bringing you into a position that felt both intimate and vulnerable. You were completely folded under him.
A cry escaped your lips as Joel began to move on top of you, his face hovering just inches above yours, the heat between you palpable. No one had ever penetrated you so deeply; it felt as though he was everywhere, filling you completely, every inch of you alive with sensation.
Joel's right hand gently squeezed your neck, seeking your mouth for a kiss as his movements took on a more urgent pace. The rhythmic collision of his hips against your buttocks created a beautiful sound that echoed off the walls, each thrust punctuated by the soft, desperate gasps that slipped from his mouth. Your own cries mingled with his as your body tightened again, your hands moving frantically up and down his back, your nails digging into his flesh, leaving little marks that he would surely wear like badges of pleasure.Â
A broken sound escaped from Joel, raw and primal, as he sank his face into the crook of your neck once more, increasing his thrusts with a fervor that felt animalistic, as if the world outside had fallen away and this moment was all that mattered. He fucked you into the mattress with an intensity that left you breathless, as though he were trying to ground you both in this fleeting reality, where nothing else existed except for the two of you entwined together.
You melted around him, your juices mixing with his as you enveloped him completely, and just when you thought you couldnât take any more, he lifted his head, your forehead resting against yours, his wide eyes locking into yours. You had never seen them so dark, so filled with intensity and strength.
And then it hit you:Â It was Joel, your Joel, the one who had been your best friend for four years, and here he was, fucking the life out of you like no one ever had before. What could possibly come after an experience like this?
âI thought you didn't like me,â he said, his voice choppy, strained with effort. A smirk played at the corners of his swollen lips. âSuch a bad liar, baby, look at you.â
You growled in response, fingers tangling in his hair, pulling him towards you with a mix of force and anger. Your lips found his in a kiss that was anything but patient, igniting a spark between you. You felt him tense above you, one of his hands quickly moving to your center, exerting immense pressure as he leaned his weight on his other arm, holding you captive beneath him.
His fingers found your clit, tracing gentle circles that made your back arch involuntarily, another wave of pleasure building inside you. Your mouth was still on his, consuming him completely, when your second orgasm crashed over you like a tidal wave. You felt your insides tighten around him, squeezing him with a ferocity that pulled him closer to his own climax.
Joel gasped into your mouth, and the intensity of it sent your vision spiraling into darkness for a brief moment, the sensation so strong it felt as if the world had collapsed around you. When your breathing finally steadied, you found his hot body pressed against yours, moving in tiny tremors, quickened breaths brushing against your jaw.
He stayed inside you for a few moments longer, savoring the closeness, your hands continuing to caress his back, each touch a silent promise. Then, slowly, he pulled out of you, leaving you feeling achingly empty, his cum trickling from your entrance.
He fell limply beside you, his body slick with sweat, and pulled you close to him, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. His breaths, still heaving, crashed against your damp skin, wrapping you in warmth. Unable to muster the energy to move, you let your eyes flutter closed, surrendering to a deep, exhausted sleep that you would not remember when you woke up...
No, you didn't remember any dream, Because when you opened your eyes the next morning, you stirred in place and your muscles ached pleasantly, reminding you of the night before. And as you stretched your arms across the bed, your fingers grazed the sheets, feeling an emptiness beside you.
When you looked to your sides, the realization hit you hard.
Joel was gone.
taglist: @orcasoul
#joel miller#joel miller fanfic#joel miller smut#joel miller x you#joel miller fic#tlou fic#tlou hbo#tlou joel#capuccinodoll#joel miller is your best friend#joel x reader#joel tlou#joel the last of us#pedro pascal fic#pedro pascal joel#dbf!joel
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game on 02 | jjk
pairing: jungkook x reader
word count: 2.9k
genre: footballer!jungkook, fake dating, f2l
rating: 18+
warnings: lots of smoochies !! đ€, their first kiss <3, umm mentions of jk's infamous threesome again đ, koo talks abt taking girls in missionary what can i say he is a man
summary: jungkook and you practice acting for the cameras. kissing him feels more right than you anticipated.
a/n: yayy chapter 2 is here!!!! <3 writing this was truly saur much fun n i hope u have fun reading too !!! đ
read chappie one here
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"Just kiss me."
"Hold on a second."
"We really need to practise this."
"I know, just give me a minute."
You scoot away from Jungkook on the couch. You were sitting so close, almost about to kiss him actually, but his intense, doe-eyed gaze made you pause, needing a grounding breath.
Youâve never been this close to his face, and somehow, you canât seem to cross the invisible line that keeps you from just pressing your mouth on his. Jungkookâs your friend, after all. Youâve known him since he was five and once saw him get his head stuck at school, so of course itâs weird.
You press your lips together in an attempt to focus, and lean in again, but once your eyes meet his, a smile urges on your mouth.
"Oh my god." Jungkookâs frustrated sigh cuts the air. "This canât already be doomed to failure because of a simple kiss."
"Itâs not! I just need to mentally prepare myself."
"I feel...offended? Kinda?" Jungkook weaves his fingers through his hair. "Iâve never had to convince someone to kiss me."
"Itâs not you. I promise!" you say, reaching for his knee. "Under any other circumstance, if we werenât friends, Iâd love to kiss you. Youâre hot and cute, but the situation weâre in makes me feel so stupid. Itâs absurd."
Jungkook cringes when you call him cute and removes your hand off his knee.
Yesterday, when Jungkook showed up unannounced, it took him full ten minutes to convince you he wasnât pulling a prank on you.
Who would believe their friend begging you to fake date them? Itâs ridiculous. Only happens in the fictional world.
But then Jungkook showed you the pap picture that was circulating online. The comments and gossip were nasty and you knew he was caught up in a deep mess.
In the photo, Jungkook was surrounded by two girls, his arms draped casually around their waists as they stumbled out of the club, a half-full drink lazily held in his hand. His hair was a tousled mess, likely from the girls running their fingers through it, and the first few buttons of his shirt were undone, revealing a small peek into his defined chest. It was bold, provocative â definitely not the ideal image of a responsible twenty-year-old football rookie.
Probably the worst pap pic youâve seen of him so far. And the worst timing too.
"You were wasted," you commented, staring at the article he was showing you on his phone.
"And I had so much fun last night." His voice was tinged with frustration, like a child whose favourite toy had just been snatched away. "But then I woke up to this picture, and a flood of missed calls and texts." He rubbed his hands over his face, exhaling sharply. "They just had to ruin it for me."
Noticing your raised eyebrow, Jungkook quickly backtracked. "No, I know itâs my fault too. I shouldnât have done this right before the World Cup, especially after what I promised. I just hate how everything turns into such a big deal, just because... well, just because Iâm me."
The idea of fake dating Jungkook had seemed absurd, something out of a rom-com rather than real life. But the more he explained the pressure he was under, the more you understood why he needed this.
Jungkook was your best friend, and if kissing him in public could save his career, why not help him?
While you got ready for meeting his manager, stepping out of your comfy, rotting-at-home clothes, which consisted of little shorts and an oversized t-shirt (you think itâs actually Jungkookâs, but youâre not quite sure since itâs been in your closet for years now), and slipping into a casual, more presentable outfit, Jungkook busied himself fixing your laundry machine.
Jungkookâs manager knows you well â his entire team does. You are known as Jungkookâs close friend and had been spotted with him on multiple occasions.
Taesung greeted you warmly, though surprise flickered across his face when Jungkook introduced you as the solution to the fake dating plan.
You felt Taesungâs gaze assessing you, weighing your suitability for the role. Jungkookâs PR agent mirrored his scepticism, tilting her head in doubt. They exchanged uncertain glances, which made you nervous, but Jungkook was determined. Jungkook wasnât Jungkook if he didnât get what he wanted. With a few persuasive words and his usual charm, he quickly won Taesung over, who sighed and leaned back in his chair, conceding defeat.
"We need to establish the narrative from the start," Taesung said seriously. "The media will dig into your background, and theyâll want to know if thereâs anyone else in the picture. So, to be clear, youâre officially single. No boyfriend, no complicated past relationships that could surface. We donât need any messy stories."
You assured them that there was none. Multiple times. No angry exes, no secret relationships â your personal life was as drama-free as it could get.
Taesung slid a document across the desk.
"This ensures that whatever happens, no details of this arrangement-"
Jungkookâs hand shot out, halting the paper. "No," he said firmly. "She doesnât need to sign anything."
"Jungkook, itâs just a formality," Jiwoo began, but Jungkook insisted.
"I trust ___. Sheâs not just anybody. Sheâs my best friend. If she says she wonât talk, she wonât talk. The NDA isnât necessary."
"Itâs okay," you assured him gently.
Jungkook shook his head. "No, this is ridiculous. Youâre not signing a stupid contract."
After more arguing, his manager eventually relented.
Jiwoo outlined the plan in more detail with Taesung â public appearances, social media posts, carefully orchestrated moments that would sell the story to the public. You felt a bit intimidated by the pressure, but youâd get used to it. After all, this arrangement is only for a few months â just until his management can announce that youâd mutually decided to break up on good terms.
But you both need to practise before stepping in front of the cameras.
Which leads you to this moment, a day later, sitting on your couch trying to practice how to act like a couple. And itâs not going well at all.
"Okay, letâs start from the basics then," Jungkook suggests. He rises to his feet, offering you his hand. "Hold my hand."
You gingerly accept his hand, standing up as well.
"See, donât we look cute?" Jungkook drags you to the mirror. "Or maybe â letâs intertwine our fingers. I think that would look better." He holds your interlaced hands up between the two of you, a satisfied grin plastered on his face. "So cute, right?"
A giggle bubbles in your throat. "You act like youâve never had a girlfriend."
"Well, it has been a while," he admits, the slightest sulk on his lips. "Iâm too busy for relationships." He swings your hands. "The only times I ever hold a girlâs hand is in missionary, above their head when-"
"Jungkook," you interrupt quickly before he can delve any deeper into the story. You give him a mock glare, but thereâs no hiding the amusement dancing in your eyes. "Didnât we both agree on only talking about your bed stories after Iâve had at least one bottle of soju â preferably two, so I can mentally brace myself?"
You love him, you really do, but you donât want to hear about his bed stories, unless youâre the slightest bit tipsy at first.
"Oh, yeah." He shakes his head apologetically. "Forgot about that."
"Wait, maybe thatâs what we should do!" you exclaim as an idea pops into your mind. Your hand slips out of his, and you take a step toward the kitchen. "I think there are a few bottles of soju in the fridge."
"Weâre not getting drunk to build up the courage to kiss," he insists. "We shouldnât need alcohol to pretend weâre into each other."
Jungkook pulls you closer to him, and you stumble slightly, but his hand instinctively moves to the small of your back, steadying you.
"Fine," you sigh dramatically, hand on his chest. "Was just an idea to make this easier for us." The fabric of his shirt is extremely soft and your fingers glide over it.
"I mean, itâs not like weâre complete strangers. And they know it too. Weâve been through enough to pull this off without breaking a sweat."
Heâs is right. The public knows youâre one of Jungkookâs closest friends. It wouldnât be totally unbelievable that you two might have fallen in love.
After all, youâve always been comfortable with each other âhugging, cuddling during movie nights, play-fight over silly things just to annoy each other. Youâve shared quiet moments, like when youâd fall asleep on his shoulder after a long day or when heâd run his fingers through your hair absentmindedly while you talked. There were times when Jungkook was exhausted and crashed at your place, your fingers gently scratching his head as he slept peacefully. Youâve kissed each otherâs cheeks in thanks without hesitation.
Jungkookâs touch isnât foreign to you.
And still, the thought of acting like youâre in love when youâre not feels strange. Sure, youâve always been physically close, but this was different. This time, every gesture would be for an audience, every touch would carry a different meaning. It wasnât just casual anymore.
"I guess," you reply, fiddling with the hem of his oversized t-shirt, avoiding his gaze for a moment. "I think itâs just weird to be this close for show."
Jungkook watches you for a moment, his eyes softening as he considers your words. "Yeah," he murmurs. "But itâs not like weâre faking the friendship part. The rest...weâll figure out." His fingers clasp your hip, the pads of his fingers gently digging into your flesh. "Donât think about it too much," he says. "When we have our first public appearance as a couple, pretend like the cameras arenât there, act nonchalant. Just... yâknow. You and me."
You pout, an involuntarily frustrated grumble leaving your lips as you drop your forehead on his chest.
"I hope Iâll do well under all the attention."
Youâve dealt with your fair share of noisy people trying to pry into your relationship with Jungkook, but so far, itâs been somewhat manageable.
"Just you and me," Jungkook repeats, his tone softer and more assured this time. "Nothing can happen to you when Iâm there."
You glance up at him, taking in the gentle lines of his face.
"Maybe you shouldâve hired a girl that can deal well with attention," you voice your thoughts.
"No." Jungkookâs immediate response rolls off harshly on his tongue. "You were my first thought. I wouldnât have done this with anyone else but you."
"I was your first choice?" Giddiness makes your face shine.
"Yeah. I donât think I wouldâve felt comfortable with anyone but you."
"Be honest, you just really wanna kiss me."
You stand on your tippy toes, a silly smile spreading across your face.
Jungkook cocks his head to the side, a teasing glint buried in his eyes.
"I think you do."
With a surge of confidence, you take a small step closer, your heart beating a little faster as you close the gap between you and Jungkook. Your lips meet in a gentle, fleeting touch. The contact only lasts for a moment before you pull back, your eyes searching his for a reaction.
"That was a smooch. Not a kiss."
You frown upon hearing him complain.
"What, you want to make out with me in public?"
Jungkook sniffs a laugh. "No, but maybe a little more than how fifth graders kiss."
"Youâre a kissing expert now?" you quip back, narrowing your eyes at him.
Jungkook leans in slightly. "I just know what I like."
The challenge in his voice sparks something in you. "Then show me how you like it."
His gaze drops to your lips, and a flutter of excitement spreads in your tummy. Itâs unexpected and thrilling and it catches you off guard.
Jungkookâs hand, which had been resting on your back, slowly glides up, his fingers curling around the side of your face, his thumb brushing delicately against your cheekbone.
Your breath hitches as he leans in. His lips meet yours again, but this time thereâs more weight behind the contact â still soft, but deeper, more intentional. His lips move slowly and thereâs a warmth to it, a tenderness that makes your heart race even as the kiss remains gentle. He tilts his head slightly, deepening the connection just enough to make you melt into him.
The teasing atmosphere lingers in the back of your mind, but for now, itâs pushed aside by the gentle pressure of his lips on yours.
Kissing Jungkook doesnât feel weird â which makes it a little weird.
When you both finally pull back, itâs gradual. You can feel his breath, warm and steady, mingling with your own.
"Like that," he whispers, his voice barely audible, yet it sends a shiver down your spine. "Youâre a good kisser."
You pull back completely. "Excuse me?" you say. "You were doubting my kissing abilities?"
"No, not at all!" Jungkook shakes his head, amusement crinkling his eyes as he gazes at your sulky face. "Youâre just a very good kisser. Like, super gentle and smooth."
Heat crawls up your cheeks. You ignore the flush of warmth and keep your composure. "Have you been using the lip balm I got you? Your lips are soft."
"I know, right? Not chapped at all anymore."
He traces two fingers along his bottom lip and your eyes follow the motion, finding yourself inexplicably drawn to his lips.
"Are we done practising?"
"Do you think we looked natural?" Jungkookâs hand slips into yours once more. While he is focused on the mirror, adjusting the way your bodies fit together â tugging you closer, alternating between holding your hand and interlacing your fingers â your mind is still replaying the memory of the tender press of his lips. "For me, it felt pretty natural. Not awkward at all. What do you think?"
Itâs the simplicity with which he says it that draws a short laugh out of you.
The sound grabs his attention. "What?"
"Youâre just...extremely serious about this. I donât think theyâll analyse the way we hold hands, Kook."
"But thatâs their favourite thing to do," Jungkook replies. "The gossip mills love analysing every step you take, where your eyes wander, who you smile at." A note of bitterness threads through his words.
Heâs been playing pro for just two years and has fallen victim to greedy people intruding on his life so many times already. Former friends who leaked private conversations, acquaintances who turned their brief interactions into tabloid fodder, even strangers who felt entitled to a piece of him just because he was in the public eye.
Jungkook searched for solace and silence at your place many times, trying to escape the madness. In the quiet of your dorm, breathing felt easier.
You never asked questions, never pried. In a world where everyone seemed out to get something from him, you just let him be, offering him the comfort of your presence without demanding anything in return.
"People were just criticising this dude â ah, who was it again?" Jungkook stares at the ceiling, raking through his thoughts. "I canât remember his name, but this guy was getting called out for choosing the booth seat while making his girlfriend sit in the aisle seat."
"The aisle seat? Come on, itâs an unwritten rule that-" You fall silent once you catch Jungkookâs pointed expression. "I mean, yeah. Itâs definitely wrong to make a big deal about it. Maybe she prefers sitting there," you shrug.
"But do you see what I mean?" he asks. "Whether you intend to or not, youâre always judging what others do. And that judgement only intensifies when it involves a celebrity."
"Ah, when did you become so famous Jeon Jungkook?" You sigh, looking down at your linked hands.
"I know, right? Two years ago, no one wouldâve cared if I had a threesome." He shakes his head in disbelief. "And now I am being punished for itâkicked off the national team, and my best friend has to save me by fake dating me."
"I feel like this would make a good movie," you giggle.
âWe have to practise hard, then," he says.
You pull your phone from your pocket. "What if we film ourselves kissing so we can monitor it better?" You set up your phone on a nearby shelf and position yourselves in front of the camera. "Donât engaged couples do this? I feel like weâre practising for our wedding kiss."
"Oh, butterflies."
"Huh?" You stare at the way he holds his hand against his tummy.
"You just told me you want to marry me. That gave me butterflies."
You slap his arm. "Stop being silly, we have a whole nation to fool that weâre in love."
~
Hang outs with Jungkook often end with the two of you lounging on the couch, snacks scattered everywhere, and a movie playing on the TV.
"Next one?" Jungkook asks from his spot beside you, inching closer with his pleading doe eyes.
You try to push him away by the, but he doesnât budge.
"I need to study. Like, for real." You had warned him before starting the movie, agreeing to watch only one, but he still tried his luck.
He holds up one finger. "Just one."
You push him off your body, and this time he allows it, his back slumping against the couch. The grumble of complaint in his throat gets muffled by his pursed lips.
"Youâre smart. The material is probably set in your brain anyway. No need to revise anything."
You scoff at his bratty words.
"So you wonât ever need to ditch hangouts for football practice because youâre already so good at it?"
"Well, no." He drags the word out, brows furrowed as he considers your question, trying to come up with a reasonable answer. "But I know you donât need to study as much as you do. Youâre just naturally smart."
"I wish, but I ace my exams because I study as much as I do."
"Aish," Jungkook mutters, standing up from the couch and stretching his limbs. His toned tummy peeks out from under his lifted shirt.
"Karina will be home soon anyway," you say. "And Iâm not ready to play pretend in front of her yet." The thought of confessing to your roommate that Jungkook is now your boyfriend makes you shudder.
It was one of the conditions that made you briefly reconsider if you could really pull this off or if Jungkook should find another girl. You didnât just have to act in front of the cameras â everyone had to believe that you and Jungkook are a couple, including your friends and family. You dread the day you have to tell your parents.
You know they once secretly hoped Jungkook would become your boyfriend when you were older, but as he became famous and the public started scrutinising his every move, your parents grew wary of his wild, reckless side.
You follow Jungkook to the door.
"You think sheâll believe us?"
"I dunno," you shrug. "Not sure if sheâll buy it. Sheâll probably be suspicious since Iâve never talked about you in that way when we gossip, but I think weâve practised enough to at least make it look like we love each other."
Jungkook nods and hugs you briefly. "Weâll figure it out." He steps out of your apartment, typing on his phone. "My manager sent me details about our first public appearance." He scans the text, but quickly looks up at you again with an annoyed frown. "Ah, so many words. Iâll just forward you the messages." With a sweet smile and a quick wave, he starts to leave, but you tug at the back of his shirt.
You cup his face, pulling him down to you, and plant a kiss on his lips.
"Youâre my boyfriend now. Act like it."
#jeon jungkook#jungkook#jungkook fanfic#jungkook fic#jungkook scenario#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jungkook angst#jungkook drabble#jungkook best friend#jungkook smut#jungkook imagine#jungkook scenarios#bts imagine#bts scenario#bts fic#bts x you#bts x reader#bts smut#bts scenarios#bts jungkook
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I feel like poly!marauders would have s very funny debate around group halloween costumes. Lots of Sirius being dramatic and James pouting. Only for reader to do a couples costume with Barty.
Love your writing!
hahaha aweee poor boys
poly!marauders x fem!reader who isn't matching with them on Halloween [576 words]
CW: ....none I don't think? the boys' theatrics? a prank? pouting?
âFor the last time, Sirius, no.â Remus groaned, earning him a disbelieving scoff from Sirius and a whine from James.
âBut why, Moons? Itâs perfect.âÂ
âItâs not perfect, itâs ridiculous.âÂ
âItâs whimsical.â James interjected.
âItâs embarrassing.âÂ
âHalloween costumes are supposed to be a little embarrassing!â Sirius argued, earning him a head tilt from James.
âWell, now, I donât think theyâre supposed to be embarrassing. MaybeâŠfunny? Quirky?â
âI donât care what theyâre supposed to be, we are not dressing up as the big bad wolf and the three little pigs.â Remus declared with an air of finality, causing Sirius to deflate rather spectacularly.Â
âWell what do you suggest we dress up as, then?â He muttered just as you entered their dorm.Â
âUh oh. Whyâs Sirius got his pouting face on?â You commented as you pulled off your school robes. Sirius turned his pout towards you and gave you his best puppy dog eyes.
âMoons is being sâmean to me.â
You made a sympathetic cooing sound that had Remus rolling his eyes before you took Siriusâ face between your hands and kissed his pouting lips.Â
As you pulled your lips away but not your face, you whispered to your grumpy boyfriend. âWas he being mean to you, or did he just say no?âÂ
Sirius balked at you as Remus let out an inelegant snort and Jamesâ laughter bounced off the stone walls of their shared dorm.Â
âYou know what? Fine, screw all of you. Iâm going to wear whatever the hell I want and you all will just have to figure out your own costumes.â Sirius huffed as he pretended to turn away from you, only for him to fold the second you started to walk away and pull you into his lap.Â
âWait, wait. You guys havenât figured out your costumes yet?â You asked in disbelief, clearly wondering how the three of them could put so much thought and planning into their pranks and mischief, yet completely fumble Halloween.Â
âWellâŠno?â Remus asked as James blurted âwhat do you mean you guys?âÂ
âGuys, Iâve had my costume planned for weeks!âÂ
âWeeks?â Remus parotted.Â
âWeeks.â You insisted.Â
âButâŠâ James started helplessly. âIâŠI thought we were going to match?âÂ
You looked somewhat sympathetic for him, but grimaced at your admission. âSomeone else asked first, bubs.â
âYouâre matching someone else?!â Sirius shrieked as he all but threw you off his lap so he could look at you.Â
âOh for Merlin- yes.âÂ
âWho?â The three boys chorused with varying levels of theatrics.Â
And the next night, one could find three pouting marauders sitting dejectedly in the Gryffindor common room dressed as the three blind mice under the suggestion of their girlfriend. Their girlfriend, who was currently wearing matching costumes with Barty Crouch Junior - a pirate and his Treasure.Â
Remus mightâve found it in him to be a little more miffed about it if you hadnât looked so sodding good in gold and bedazzled all to hell.Â
âNote to self,â James muttered defeatedly, âspend less time planning the Halloween prank and more time on the Halloween costume next year.âÂ
The end of his sentence was punctuated by screaming when the multiple 12 foot skeletons lining the room started walking on their own accord.Â
It was way less funny than they had imagined it would be when Barty threw âhis bootyâ over his shoulder and took off out of the portrait hole.Â
âDuly noted.â Sirius sighed as he took another swig of his drink.
#ask elle#marauders era#marauders au#marauders fanfiction#reader insert#self insert#sirius black#remus lupin#james potter#poly!marauders#poly!marauders x reader#poly!marauders x you#poly!marauders fluff#poly!marauders imagine#sirius black x reader#sirius black x you#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#james potter x reader#james potter x you#the marauders#marauders x reader#poly marauders x reader#poly marauders x you#marauders#ellecdc fics#best friend barty crouch jr#best friend!barty
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More of Stanley's sketchbook because he makes me sick /pos
(Just imagine he was looking in a mirror at the subway to draw this anshfhwj. The london bus ticket is unrelated, it's just a random knick knack he had lying around<3)
People weren't the only ones Stan met on the streets.
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+ this is an absolute fucking batshit WILD oneshot I initially wrote for these drawings that got WAY out of hand, if you feel like reading that.
The oneshot below is a stand-alone now, and in no way is related to the drawings above, but I just wanted to show you guys because Jesus Christ
------
Winter of 1981, at a subway station Stan doesn't remember the name of-
The sorry excuse of a transport system that this hellhole of a city called a functioning subway was hardly anyone's first choice of a warm place to stay the night. And yet, here Stanley was; standing like an idiot in the middle of a small bustling stairwell that led down to the full screeching chaos of a train stop on a Tuesday evening. A rowdy crowd of exhausted office workers streamed out like a tidal wave from the entrance of the station, the bustle of their footsteps all too eager to go home and relax after a long day of work.
The faint, stuffy stench of old piss and sweat followed the crowd to the surface from the deep depths of a less than sanitary and overcrowded train station. The pungent smell intermingled with the crisp stinging winter air in a cocktail of shitty city gloom often associated with this time of the year; when the holidays were too far away and the sun seemed to come and go with practically the same 9 to 5 schedule as the workers had, leaving them going to work in the pitch dark and coming back out in the inky black as well.
He might have looked like he belonged there, depending on how one would want to look at it. He stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the sea of prim, pressed suits and neart uniforms. His ratty old jacket and generally unwashed appearance certainly didnât help his case, but he also knew that stations like these also tended to shelter quite a number of homeless wanderers like him, especially during the winter. So, it wasn't exactly uncommon to see other sore thumbs seeking reprieve from the biting cold and the dangerous likelihood of frostbite from within the enclosed walls of the subway station.
Heck, if most of these underground kingdoms didn't also happen to be a breeding ground for several illicit activities, he might even have followed their lead. But, believe it or not, Stanley's already had enough experience with illegal activities to last him a last time, and he isn't looking for a new fill. He was satisfied with what meager shelter his trusty car offered him, as little a difference it might make in terms of safety.
Stanley's obstruction of the already narrow stairs with his loitering went unappreciated, as shoulders roughly shoved past him and swinging briefcases repeatedly bumped into his sides, usually coupled with a nasty glare and a snide comment or two. He paid them no mind, however. He wasn't here to start a fight with some random bum with a dead end job, as much as he thought it would probably do them both some good to duke their stresses out on one another.
The hours ticked by with wave after wave of new crowds being dropped off by a train and left to pour out of the station into the streets. By the time the streetlights turned on and the pale pink in the sky slowly faded to make way for the stark glittery black of the night sky, the tide of people had slowed to a trickle and rush hour was long since over. He was now the stairsâ sole occupier, with a few occasional stragglers stumbling up the steps and hurrying past him without a second glance.
Stanley did not move from his spot, however. He stood resolutely in the middle of the stairway, fervently rubbing his arms and stamping his feet in a futile attempt to try and regain feeling in his extremities as he waited. Rocking on his heels, he titled his head backwards to let his eyes roam the constellations that carpeted the endless expanse of the sky stretched out above his head, almost losing himself in the scintillating canvas of stars.
It reminded him of old times; of the sparkling beach sand twinkling in the dim moonlight, and the soft sound of lilting waves hovering in the background as he lay back on the cold wooden deck of his ship and watched the stars dance.
He still remembered every name his brother had once recited to him time and time again as he pointed out each star and galaxy from the night sky.
Then, like clockwork, he was broken out of his reveries by a telltale meow coming from below. The sound was a familiar blanket that immediately melted away the tension that had begun to build in his chest as he practically sagged with relief.
His body moved almost automatically as he leaned down to detach the frail tabby cat that was attempting to literally fuse with his legs, purring up a storm and rubbing her head against his pants as though her life depended on it. The cat gave a soft chirrup of dissatisfaction at being manhandled, which Stanley absentmindedly replied with a chiding click of his tongue as he lifted her up his chest and gently tucked her into his jacket in a practiced motion.
She thankfully remained blissfully limp in his grasp as he shifted around some more so that she was nestled comfortably inside the dark pocket of warmth inside his ratty jacket. The tiny warm lump that rumbled contently against his front radiated with heat, and his fingers finally began to feel like actual fingers rather than useless stiff frigid lumps of meat and bone attached to his palms.
A pointed cough startled him from his clumsy wriggling to get the cat to settle down. An oddly familiar security guard stood at the entrance of the station at the bottom of the stairs, leveling Stanley an unimpressed look with the metal gate in his grip already halfway closed, ready to seal the subway for the night. He must have been a comical sight; caught awkwardly bent over while trying to get his newly acquired cat to stop kneading biscuits on his stomach, with said cat peeking out from the gap between his collars.
Stanley faintly recognized the guard. He was a much older man, with a shock of thinning white hair neatly tucked underneath a dark blue cap and a strange depth in his eyes that reminded Stanley of the sea; with countless unspoken truths lurking far beneath the surface, but no less grand and knowing of all that the universe had to offer, as though he had already lived a thousand lives before this one.
He had seen the man around before, at another station, doing the opposite of his job by ushering stray buskers and homeless stragglers from the streets and into the (relatively) safe walls of the subway, instead of doing what any other law-abiding security guard would do and kick them out into the elements. He wasn't sure what the older man was doing here, of all places, since all the previous stations he'd seen the man at had been several states over, practically on the other side of the country.
A brief spark of panic shot through his spine at the thought that this man could be following him, but he quickly discarded the ridiculous notion as soon as it entered his mind. He had never even seen him before, and hardly ever even interacted with him; there was no reason for there to be any sort of bad blood between them. Unless he happened to be related to one of Stanley's many, many enemies, then perhaps his fear was a little warranted.
However, the old guard made no move to attack or do anything other than stare judgmentally, almost expectantly. For the first time in a long time, Stanley felt like a child being caught doing something he wasn't supposed to do. He tried his best to keep his uncomfortable squirming to a minimum under the unrelenting gaze, stubbornly returning the man's gaze with his own wary glare. His catâs muffled whining came from inside his jacket. The traitor, she was leaving him to deal with the old man on his own.
With an exasperated jerk of his head, the security guard gestured towards the inside of the station. For a moment, Stanley stared dumbly, uncomprehending of what the old man could possibly want from him. Rolling his eyes, this time the man gestured more insistently at the small gap that still remained between the metal gate and the entrance, his arm sweeping the air in a low arc as he dramatically urged Stanley inside. Suddenly, it clicked, and Stanley shook his head.
âI have a car,â he said plainly, his voice echoing loudly in the desolate silence of the winter night that surrounded the unlikely pair.
He wasn't sure why he was so nervous, it wasn't as though he was lying. He did have a car, his trusty Stanley-mobile was parked safely away in the corner of an unassuming alley that wasn't often frequented by anyone. There was no way he was reaching it tonight, though; it was practically on the other side of the city, much too far away for him to arrive at a reasonable time. His nightly excursions to meet his small friend unfortunately left him with no other choice than to leave his car behind, the hunk of metal far too unwieldy and noticeable to drive around openly on the streets. He never knew who could be watching, after all.
He had simply been hoping to find himself a dark corner to tuck himself into with his cat, just for the night, but it seemed as though the universe had other plans. Or rather, this strange old man had other plans.
Although, if Stanley thought about it, the subway wasn't such a bad suggestion. This was one of the safer stations in the city; and with the rich neighborhoods being so close by, no rogue criminal or dealers dared to come near this area unless they wanted to be slapped with a hefty fine or face a higher potential to be arrested. And of course, there was the obvious shelter from the unrelenting cold that now seemed to permeate his bones, even with the purring warmth that was nestled inside his jacket.
So, that was how he found himself hunkering down for the night inside a shabby old subway station, with a satisfied cat still rumbling away against his chest and a strange old security guard locking down the gates behind him. The man said nothing as he hooked his keys back onto his belt and gave a firm pat on Stanley's shoulders as he walked past him, pausing to scratch his cat behind her ears before moving away. His footsteps bounced off of the grimy tiled walls with an odd reverb as he turned a corner.
âYou'll be safe in here,â the man said, voice sage and gravelly. The words had a weight to them, and seemed to hang in the air with such a presence it was as though the old man had never even left his side.
The subway was empty, quiet. It was such a stark contrast to the loud rowdiness of the rush hour crowd these halls once held. Stanley hadn't yet registered the utter silence of the station as he aimlessly made his way down the winding, deserted halls of the ancient station. He mindlessly walked past the aged and peeling advertising posters plastered on the walls, his nose becoming accustomed to the stinging stench of the subway. The quiet seemed to swallow the sound of his steps as he explored the branching paths and endless tunnels. They were almost kaleidoscopic, dizzying, nonsensical. There were doors where there shouldn't be, and deadends where it didn't make sense.
The silence only began to truly settle in his bones the more he walked. He suddenly wished that he would head the telltale footsteps of the old security guard again, just to hear another sign of life in this underground hellscape other than himself. The ghostly memories of screeching trains and bustling crowds haunted the halls; now, only nothingness reigned supreme. He glanced down at his small feline companion, who slumbered away against his chest, blissfully unaware of his jackrabbiting heartbeat threatening to burst out of his ribs. The silence seemed to permeate every inch of space and crush the air out of his lungs. He couldn't breathe.
Stanleyâs steps grew faster, more frantic as the walls and ceilings seemed to close in on him. They grew smaller, tighter; squeezing, trapping. He hardly even registered his cat's complaints as she was jostled around in his grasp, breaking into a full out run. His breathing sounded loud, too loud, and the world was collapsing around him.
When he finally broke out into a large, open platform, he could finally breathe again. He had arrived at the tracks, the empty tunnel where the trains would pass an empty, gaping maw in the wall that seemed to swallow all light around it and beckon him closer. He felt his cat wriggle out from within his jacket and hop out with a displeasured yowl, scampering away and disappearing behind a corner much like the old man had. True silence pierced his ears and thrummed like a deafening pressure in his temples. He was alone.
Stanley was stuck in that subway station for years.
#i only have the Paris and Korean subways as frame reference so i have no idea what american subways look like#just imagine the paris subway system- i heavily used it as a reference to draw and write these since it's#the only subway that I know AND looks 1980-ish enough to pass#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#gravity falls fanfiction#gravity falls au#<-ig???#there are mirrors in subways right- I've seen a lot of curved wall length mirrors at subway stations#stanley pines#stan pines#grunkle stan#stanley's sketchbook#tw liminal space#tw horror#<- I mean eh- my horror writing skills is sub par at best#cats#tw scopophobia#tw staring#on the other hand- stanley being friends with street cats!! so cute <33#you can visibly SEE in the fic where I completely lost my grip on the story from 'sweet story about cats' to 'oh my god what the fuck'#my art
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jump then fall (into you) | part 1
banner by the talented @jimilterâ đ
pairing â jungkook x reader
genre â cruise AU, fake dating AU, best friends to lovers AU | fluff, angst, smut
word count â 52k (split into 3 parts | pt 1. 24k)
18+ | warnings â swearing, drinking, sexual content: foreplay, oral m. and f., nipple play, protected sex etc.
summary â bringing Jungkook along as your date to your exâs lavish cruise wedding seemed like a perfect idea at first â all of your family and close friends together, nothing can go wrong⊠then Jungkookâs ex shows up and all of a sudden youâre in a years long relationship with him. You donât mind though, really, how hard can sharing a cabin and pretending to be deeply in love with your best friend really be?
note. i'm backkkkk...?! with a disclaimer too:
Iâve been writing this on and off for pretty much two years so 1. it's not proofread bc i have not got the attention span to do that for 50k+ and I never got to read over what I previously wrote before working on it again so it might be a bit mismatchedâŠ? 2. I canât say Iâm hugely happy with this fic because it wasnât a continuous workflow, it just doesnât match the standards I have for myself but i tried and Iâll do better for the next ones which Iâm excited about ;)
please interact and tell me how you find it! <3 it's been forever and i've missed you all đ„ș
due to tumblr text post limitations, Iâve had to publish in three parts â links for part 2 + 3 can be found at the end.
 â  a part of the seven seas collab hosted by the wonderful yannie @ressjeon đđ„° two years late but I made it :â)
part 1
âGosh, Y/N, itâs a three week trip, youâre not going for a year!âÂ
The frustration in Jungkookâs voice has you whipping around, a pair of Valentinoâs in one hand, Manoloâs in the other. âItâs Alexâs wedding cruise, Jungkook. Everyone and their parents are going to be there, mine included!âÂ
âNot mine!â he huffs, putting the last of your swimsuits into the suitcase open in front of him. You donât blame him for being so frustrated, after all, he has been folding your clothes for the last hour while his single suitcase sits ready to go downstairs in the foyer.Â
âActually in case youâve forgotten,â you start, stepping carefully through the piles of clothes in your massive closet to go towards him, âmy mom has fed and even bathed you once after that time you wet yourself, so technically sheâs as good as yours too.â
âThat was one time, and I barely even remember it so it doesnât count.â
âI do,â you smile, coming to stop in front of him.Â
He sighs, looking down at the stilettos youâre holding. âWeâve been packing for hours already, you shouldâve done this nights ago if it was gonna take this long.â
Now itâs you whoâs sighing. âItâs been an hour not hours, besides weâre almost done now.â
Jungkook arches his brow, folding his arms in front of him. âThen whatâre all your clothes doing on the floor?â
âThey just need to go in one of the suitcases,â you smile. âSee, weâre almost done.â
Unconvinced, Jungkook looks around at the mess but eventually nods. âFine, but you can finish yourself, Iâm going to eatââ
âNo, wait, you canât leave me!â you exclaim, reaching for Jungkook as your eyes go wide as a doe.
Telltale traces of a smile on Jungkookâs features let you know he was expecting this. He looks down at you, a loose curl hanging over his forehead. There was once a time when you were the taller one, but that only lasted a few years before Jungkook got in a good few inches between you.Â
Both of you were just turning six when you first met although it always felt like Jungkook was a little younger to you in the first few years of your friendship, probably because of his naturally introverted nature which he more often steps out of when he feels comfortable to do so. But back then, he was just a wide eyed six year old who hid behind his mother as she came to work on her first day at the estate you call home.Â
Knowing Jungkook was the same age as you and from a single parent household, your mom suggested that he could stay with you instead of his mom needing to hire someone to look after him while she worked. That was probably one of the best things that ever happened to the both of you. Jungkook became a better friend to you than many of those at your private school full of elementary school kids who wished they were ten years older than they were, and as the years went on there was nothing you didnât do together.Â
Naturally, your family got to know Jungkook well and being the little smartass heâs always been, Jungkook impressed your father so much that he helped him to apply for a scholarship position as you moved into high school. Of course Jungkook got in, and though it was only a partial scholarship, your father insisted on paying the rest of his fees which his mother found hard to accept but Jungkook promised your father to pay him back in the future. Fast forward a little more than a decade and Jungkook has paid back all of the fees thanks to being CEO of an affluent software company developed from his love of gaming.Â
He struggles to fight his smile and you can see heâs contemplating going down or not, having to choose between food or you. âWhat do you even need me for?â he asks, taking the smallest step closer, so small you donât even notice.Â
âFashion advice?â you shrug, keeping an iron-like grip on his arms.Â
He narrows his eyes. âYou told me my fashion style is shit.â
âWas,â you correct, sliding your hands up his arms and down his chest with a satisfied smile. âNow is different though, Iâve rubbed off on you.â You glance down at his figure too, checking out his outfit.Â
Jungkook chuckles as he follows your gaze. âWhy would you need my help when you have yourself then, hm?â
Pouting at him, your arms slip around his waist and squeeze him in a hug. âYouâre Mr Muscle, who else is gonna help me carry all this stuff?â
He pouts back sarcastically. âIs princess gonna break a heel if she carries her own suitcase?â
As you shrug, your brows remain furrowed. âMaybe, or a nail,â you say, letting one hand off his waist to show off a fresh manicure. As you wiggle your fingers ahead of him, he breaks into a smile.Â
âYou know you have a bunch of dudes in suits downstairs, just waiting to help you with this stuff. Iâm pretty sure itâs their job.âÂ
âYes, but they donât give me fashion advice like you do,â you respond with a cheeky wink.
Jungkook takes the heels youâre holding off of you. âHereâs some advice â pack light.â He throws the heels behind him somewhere in your closet, earning a frown from you as your eyes follow where they land in the middle of your blown out closet.Â
âFine,â you sigh, looking back up at him. âIâll lose the heels if you promise youâll stay with me now.â
As a small smile grows on his lips, Jungkookâs arms find their way around your waist too. âOnly if you promise youâll make me a sandwich before we go?â His smile grows knowingly as he gives in to your charm â youâve always found itâs easy to encourage Jungkook to go along with whatever you want, he just canât seem to say no to you.Â
âPB and J?â you ask with a smile that matches his.
He nods once, eyes shimmering as he still gazes at you.Â
âOf all the foods you could ask for, itâs always PB and J,â you laugh.
He shrugs, letting go as you move to finish packing. âThereâs nothing else I want.â
Arching a brow, you throw a few pairs of linen pants towards one of the suitcases in your closet. âWe literally have a live-in chef, you know, Frederico, the guy you have a secret handshake with?â
âYes, what of him?â Jungkook says huffing.Â
âAnd you still want PB and J when he can make you anything?â
Jungkook steps towards your suitcase and picks up a pair of pants to roll. âI know that, but I just need some food in me and quick, so the simple option is best.â
Stepping forward, you take the pants off of him and roll them yourself. âIf you would be patient enough to wait a few more minutes then you could have a sandwich thatâll fill you up for longer than half an hour.â
âAnd if you didnât have more clothes than half the country combined then we would probably already be on our way to the airport,â Jungkook responds sassily, cocking his head.
âDonât get smart with me or I wonât make your sandwich,â you sass back.
âIâll just ask Freddie to make it for me and you donât get Mr Muscle.â
Grumbling, you shove the rolled pants back into his hands as he laughs, taking them to place in one of the open suitcases. Not long after, all of your suitcases are packed and in the car, ready to go.Â
The drive to the airport takes a little under an hour and upon arriving, the car takes you straight to the jet. Apparently you did take a little too long packing as your mom so pointedly lets you know after arriving, but luckily for you thereâs a few others missing from the families youâre taking the jet with. With time to kill, Jungkook and you have a few idle chats with the others, most of whom you went to school with so the conversation comes easily but eventually you settle into the seats opposite your parents.Â
âHow was your drive here, darling?â your mom asks while closing her bag after a little skin TLC.Â
âIt was fine,â you answer, pulling out your own bag full of the skincare you deemed necessary to carry for the plane trip.Â
âAnd how did you find it, Jungkook?âÂ
Jungkook shrugs. âIt was good.â
âLovely,â she smiles. âItâs going to be a wonderful trip.â
From beside her, your dad sighs, putting away his tablet. âDo we know how long the flight is to Marbella?â
âOh, honey,â your mom frowns disapprovingly. âDonât be such a grumpy lump before weâre even in the air.â
Jokingly, your father looks at Jungkook and you, and then gives your mom a side eye. âI just had a few important meetings that Chris accidentally scheduled for today so Iâm wondering if I could still make them online.â
Dismissively, your mom waves her hand. âNo work talk, weâre here to enjoy ourselves.â
âAlright, youâre right,â your dad concedes. âMaybe to start we could get a few drinks then, eh?â He raises his brow at Jungkook who approves with a big smile and both of them flag down a flight attendant.Â
Once thereâs a drink in everyoneâs hand, your parents settle into conversation with Jungkook and you.Â
âSo are you excited to see Alex, Y/N?â your father asks.Â
âAbsolutely,â you smile. âThough I think Iâm more excited to see Sophia and Alias, itâs been a long time since Iâve gotten to spend time with them.â
âOh, Jungkook, you must be excited to see Sophia too,â your mom says with a bit of a cheeky smile.
Jungkook chuckles nervously, glancing at you though youâre sporting the same smile as your mother. âI mean, yeah, weâre good friends.â
âWell if you werenât, things would be pretty awkward,â your dad laughs before helping himself to some food he ordered with the drinks.Â
âYeah,â Jungkook mutters, managing a small laugh.
âOh come on, guys,â you laugh, nudging him. âSheâs happy youâre coming too.â
He nods appreciatively before taking a sip of his drink. âItâs her parents Iâm more worried about.â
At this, your mom laughs too. âOh, Leon and Helena love you really, dear, itâs all just for a laugh.â She leans forwards and squeezes his hand with her usual tender smile. âThough if it really bothers you, we could have a word with them, without letting on itâs coming from you of course.â
Smiling, Jungkook shakes his head. âThanks, thatâs really sweet of you but itâs alright, I can take the daggers I get from them,â he chuckles. âAfter all, what I did was pretty awful.â
âYou were sixteen,â you say, patting on the last of your moisturiser.Â
He shrugs. âI know, but sheâs their little princess.â He looks across at you and then glances at your parents. âItâs like someone doing that to you, your parents would be mad.âÂ
At that, your father hums in agreement.
âHeck, Iâd be mad,â Jungkook adds.Â
Looking at him, he shrugs again and smiles. Before you can say anything, he carries on. âSixteen or not, I literally left Sophia on one of the most important nights of her life.â
âYeah, it was pretty awful at the time,â you sigh, remembering the night as clear as day.
Almost ten years ago now, the night of both yours and Sophiaâs entry into society, the debutante ball. For you, the night was a bit of a blur with it being the first night Alex and you made things official in your relationship, sealing it with a first kiss and many more that evening. It was a magical and whimsical night, and although Alex and you didnât last, your love for each other still remains as best friends and you couldnât be happier for him getting married to his dream girl now.Â
For Sophia, the night went a little differently... She'd had a crush on Jungkook for a while since, being Alexâs younger sister, sheâd seen him often with you. After he found out, he asked her to be her escort to the ball. She of course said yes and everything seemed to be going perfectly until the moment Jungkook was supposed to escort her down the stairs but he had completely disappeared. Sophia was left all alone and completely embarrassed, even after Alias, the ever caring older brother, stepped in and acted as her escort. Jungkook still hasnât told you the reason he left so abruptly that night. All you remember is not being able to reach him the whole weekend, even when you tried going to his house he was never home. When you finally saw him, he told you he didnât want to talk about it so you didnât.Â
Of course, everyone else forgot about the incident and even Sophia forgave him after he apologised profusely and endlessly, but Mr and Mrs Cirillo were less forgiving for a while, but after many years itâs just become a joke between them. The fact that heâs invited on the cruise just shows itâs all in the past now.Â
However that doesnât mean Mr and Mrs Cirillo ever pass up an opportunity to remind him of the pastâŠÂ
âItâs lovely to see you, Y/N, dear,â Mrs Cirillo says, bringing you in for a hug.Â
Mr Cirillo stands behind her, taking your hand as soon as his wife lets go. âHow was the flight here?â
âIt was good, I slept for most of it really.â Stepping away, you turn to look at Jungkook as he approaches them with a meek smile.
Mrs Cirillo smiles back, her words carrying a playful lilt. âThere he is, the heartbreaker.â
Jungkook lowers his head at that and you can see his nose scrunching a little. âThatâs me, unfortunately,â he says, stepping into Mrs Cirilloâs arms for a brief hug.Â
When he takes Mr Cirilloâs hand to shake, the older man shows the same playfulness as his wife. âNice to see you again, Jungkook. My favourite and least favourite man on board.âÂ
Jungkook chuckles and Mr Cirillo pulls him in for a hug. âStay out of trouble, yes?âÂ
âOf course,â Jungkook smiles, stepping away to stand next to you as your parents walk out onto the main deck.
Their eyes light up as the old friends all greet each other and you take Jungkookâs hand and slip away together before you get roped into a conversation.Â
âYou alright?â you ask casually as you scan the people all on the deck.
âGood, thanks,â he responds with a gentle squeeze of your hand. He knows that you know how he finds it a little tedious sometimes every time Sophiaâs parents mention the past, but he knows he messed up so he doesnât ever complain about it. In a way, it annoys you when the Cirilloâs always mention it but you know itâs not your place to say anything, especially if Jungkook hasnât said anything.Â
Looking around, you take in many of the familiar faces while scanning the crowds for Alex or one of his siblings. Thereâs no unfamiliar faces on this part of the deck, and seeing all the waiters walking around offering canapĂ©s and drinks, you realise the Cirilloâs mustâve rented out this part of the deck. The excited buzz amongst everyone extends to you as you turn to look out past the balcony towards the sea, stepping towards it and taking Jungkook with you.Â
Taking a deep breath of the fresh sea, enjoying the warmth glowing from the sun as a steady breeze blows. Exhaling, you turn around to Jungkook beaming.Â
It seems like he was already watching you, waiting as though he knows youâre gonna say something now. Seeing you smile, his corner of his lips turn too. âItâs pretty, isnât it?â
âVery,â you nod, turning around to look out again, lowering the sunglasses from your head to stop from squinting.Â
âY/N!â A familiar voice calls your name and you turn around, breaking into the biggest smile when you see Alex approaching, his arms outstretched. âJungkook!âÂ
You meet him halfway, excitedly skipping into his hug. He hugs you tight, releasing a sigh as he lets go and hugs Jungkook. âGosh, itâs been so bloody long, Iâve missed you guys.âÂ
âMissed you more, buddy,â Jungkook smiles, patting Alexâs back before he lets go. âCongrats on the wedding too, weâre well excited to be here for you.â
Alex laughs, flashing his perfect pearly smile. âHonestly, Iâm happier to have you guys here. Half of the people here havenât even spoken to me in years.â He glances around before adding, âyou know how it is.âÂ
âMhm,â you nod, squeezing his arm. âYouâve got us though, weâre here for you every step of the way.âÂ
âThanks,â he responds, taking two drinks from a passing waiter to give to you both. âYou were allowed plus ones though, when do I get to meet them?â He looks across at both of you expectantly, though you see a subtle raise of his brow matched with a small smile that seems to hint he already knows the answer.
âWell, we didnât really get the chance to ask anyone,â Jungkook answers, looking sideways at you. âSo we just thought weâd come with each other.â
âAh.â The smile on Alexâs lips grows. âWhy am I not surprised?â
âBecause you know how busy weâve both been,â you say, shrugging lightly before taking a long sip of your drink.
âHm, thatâs it,â Alex says quietly.Â
âBOO!â Large hands tap your shoulders before the man himself jumps in front of you.Â
âAlias,â you squeal excitedly, returning the hug heâs already given you. Slightly more wild albeit still as focused as his younger brother, Alias is the eldest of the Cirillo siblings and has become more of an older brother to you over the years.
âYou look like youâve grown,â he says, moving back and beaming as he pulls Jungkook in for a hug. âBoth of you.â
âWe literally saw you like a month ago,â Jungkook chuckles.Â
âReally?â Alias raises his brows in surprise. âDamn, you kids grow fast.âÂ
âI could say the same thing about that moustache of yours,â you say.Â
He smiles smugly. âLooks good right?â
Shrugging, you lean against the balcony. âI think you looked better without it.â
Alias frowns, hand coming up to stroke his moustache subconsciously. âReally?â he asks, looking at you in time to see you raising your glass to your lips to hide your smile.Â
âI knew you liked it,â he laughs. âApparently a lot of people do.â
âAh, Alias, no one wants to know,â Alex grimaces at his older brother.
Before Alias can defend himself, Jungkook says, âI do.â Alex and you both look at him and he shrugs. âMight grow mine out.â
Alias laughs, throwing his arm around Jungkookâs shoulder. âCâmon buddy, Iâll tell you all about it.â
As Alias pulls him away, Alex steps to stand next to you and both of you watch them walk away with Alias talking in a hushed tone as though no one else can find out.Â
As you watch them walk away with a fond smile on your face, Alex turns to you. âSo, how have you been?â
Still absentmindedly watching Jungkook and Alias, you hum. âGreat.â
âHowâs work?â
âMm, I actually just secured a deal with Park Motors last week.â
Glancing at Alex, you see his brows raise. âImpressive.â
âYeah, it was a pretty big win for the company and dad was proud of me.âÂ
Alex smiles. âAnd were you proud of yourself?â
As Jungkookâs head disappears from the crowd, you turn to face Alex too, taking another sip of your drink. âI know people think Iâm just riding off my parentâs success, which yeah, itâs true for the most part, but after doing this all myself I was pretty proud.â
âGood,â he grins. âYou should be. You may be one of the most princess-ed girls I know,â he adds with a teasing lilt, âbut youâre also one of the most hard working.â
Laughing, you nudge him lightly. âThanks, I appreciate it.â
âYouâre welcome.â He leans against the balcony too, pulling down his shades as he turns towards the sea where the sun shines down on the horizon. âWhat about things with Jungkook?â
Shrugging, you take a small sip. âHeâs good.â
Alex glances at you from the corner of his eye with the curve of his lips growing. âHm, anything else?â
Levelling his face, you break into a smile. âOh, Alex, youâre never gonna let this go are you?â
He smiles, shaking his head. âNot as long as I see itâs there.âÂ
Straightening your expression a little, you tilt your head. âBut thereâs nothing there.â
âY/N, thereâs everything there,â he says, matching your tone.Â
âAlex, come on,â you say quietly, traces of a smile returning.Â
He shrugs. âI make a perfectly valid point.â
Turning towards the deck again, you sigh. âI donât see it.â
âI do!â Alex almost exclaims excitedly. âAnd I have for the longest time.â Letting out a small laugh, he puts his arm around you and squeezes gently. âHis big doe eyes used to torture me all the time when I was dating you.â
You canât help but laugh at that. Jungkook does have doe eyes but you donât remember seeing them often while dating Alex.Â
âSeriously,â Alex says, fighting his case onwards. âI dated you for what, almost a year I think and Iâve never seen anyone sulk for that long.â
âHe wasnât sulking.â
âListen, Iâm almost a married man now, Y/N, and I can tell you all the looks of loveâŠâ
When you arch a brow quizzically, Alex sighs and continues. âThat boy was sulking for weeks because he hated seeing you with someone else.â
âOh come on, maybe he had a crush in the past but heâs a grown man now and has had plenty of his own romances.â
Now itâs Alex whoâs looking at you with his brow raised. âLike who?â
It takes you a moment to think of a name but a few still come to mind. âRemember Alia, the intern from my dad's company?â you ask rather smugly, although Alexâs reaction shows no surprise.Â
âThe girl who he went out with like five times.â
You shrug. âThat counts for something.
âIt really doesnât,â Alex says matter-of-factly. âAnyway, who else?â
âHmmm⊠ooh, Rachel, that super hot secretary!â
âY/N, that was a one night stand, it literally doesnât count.â
Sighing, you rack your memory for more, and then comes the answer. âValentina.â
Alex almost snorts, prompting you to frown at him.
âWhat?â you question. âThat was a real romance, there were feelings there.â
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Alex almost snorts again. âThe most real thing about that relationship was the Chopard watch Valentina tried to use to bribe Jungkook back to her.â
Wincing, you remember the finer details of that supposedly real romance. You turn back out to face the horizon, pulling your own shades down. âAlright, I guess I see your point.â
Gently pushing his point, Alex carries on. âNot to mention that I was your last serious relationship, which was how many years ago now?â
You simply shrug. âIâm not looking for anyone.â
Alex hums thoughtfully. âOr youâve already âfoundâ your someone.â This earns a glare from you but Alex ignores this. âHeâs practically your boyfriend already!âÂ
âIn what way?!â
âYou do almost everything together!â Alex exclaims back. âI wouldnât be surprised if youâve had sex already!âÂ
âAlex!â Something in your stomach curls unbidden at the thought. âWe havenât had sex!â you whisper hotly, glancing around to make sure no one heard.Â
âSorry,â Alex mumbles, looking over his shoulder too. Luckily thereâs no one nearby, everyone seems too busy engaging in their own excited conversations about the weeks to come.Â
Everything youâre hearing now isnât news to you, you know plenty of people have questioned the relationship between Jungkook and you, and you totally get why, but youâve been friends since such a young age and thatâs perfectly okay. Neither you nor Jungkook have made a move to take things further and maybe thatâs just how things are meant to stay, despite what Alex seems to think.Â
âAlso, what friend agrees to come on a 3 week long cruise for you, knowing full well my father doesnât miss a single opportunity to roast him.âÂ
âHereâs here for you, not me.â
âActually,â Alex raises a finger, âI invited him before you and he said he would meet us in Italy because things were busy with the company. I invited you after him, and the next thing I know is Jungkook is calling me telling me heâll be coming with you from the start.â
As your eyes narrow, you start to think of how that happened. After Alex invited you, you texted Jungkook straight away to ask if heâd come with you as a date to the wedding. As soon as he said yes, you started waffling on about how fun the trip was going to be and it mustâve been after that that Jungkook told Alex heâd come sooner than he previously planned.Â
âWell, any best friend would do that,â you say simply.Â
Alex pushes his lips out, brows raised. âIâm your best friend and I wouldnât do that for you.â
âHey!â You shove him hard but he barely moves.Â
âOh câmon, you wouldnât do it for me either.â Alex looks at you with a smile.Â
âYeah,â you relent. âI probably wouldnât unless you really needed me.â
Just then, you see Jungkook walking towards you, holding a platter of something. He simply beams when you frown at him in confusion.Â
From beside you, Alex raises his glass to his lips. âIâm telling you, the boy is whipped,â he says quietly before taking a sip.Â
Jungkook comes within ears width before you can say anything. âY/N, look,â he holds out the tray heâs holding, âthey have those little cracker things you like with capa, uh, capa-something.â He pushes it closer, gesturing for you to take one while looking pleased with himself.
Looking at the platter, your lips curl mindlessly into a smile. âCaponata,â you say, correcting him gently.Â
Itâs when Jungkook remembers the little things like this that his place in your heart grows and youâre grateful for having him as your best friend.Â
âYeah, thatâs the one,â he smiles. âHere, I got them for you.â
Your brows furrow together as you look down. âThe whole platter?â
âWell, yeah,â he says looking down too. âYou like them and Iâm sure thereâs more going around for everyone else.â
From beside you, Alex starts coughing and youâre more than certain you hear the word âwhippedâ coming out of his mouth. One glance at him proves youâre right as he raises his brows before looking away.Â
Jungkook, not having noticed the word Alex let slip, is eating one of the canapĂ©s before holding one out for you too. Smiling and thanking him, you take it.Â
âGood right?â Jungkook asks, his mouth full as you also eat one whole.Â
âSo good,â you mumble, brows furrowed as you keep eating.Â
Jungkook holds the tray towards Alex. âWant one?âÂ
âIâm good,â he smiles. âIâll leave you two to it though, Iâve still got some guests I need to greet.â His smile seems weary though you donât blame him, sometimes the supposed family friends in your circle donât seem very much like friends. After saying a temporary goodbye, he takes his leave, leaving Jungkook and you to continue devouring the canapĂ©s.Â
For a moment, youâre both quiet, save the sounds of pleasure from eating, then Jungkook speaks. âSophiaâs not coming with us by the way.â
Eyes wide, you turn to look at him. âWhat?!â you question, mouth half full.Â
Jungkook takes one glance at you and chuckles. His thumb comes up and wipes something close to your lips. âSheâs joining us later, from Nice.â
âOh.â Your lips turn into a pout. âWho am I gonna hang out with?âÂ
âYou-bo-me,â Jungkook says with his mouthful again. Â
âNo,â you sigh. âI donât got you. As soon as Alias is about, you and him turn into Tweedledum and Tweedledee.â
A small laugh escapes Jungkook's lips and you frown at him.
âIâm sorry,â he laughs again, placing the mostly empty tray down on a nearby table. âLook,â he takes your hands and squeezes them, âI promise Iâll stay with you, we can just hang out with Alias too.â
âYeah, I know,â you say looking up at him. âItâs fine though, you can hang out with whoever you want. You donât have to stay with me.â
Jungkook hides an amused smile. âIâll stay with you, we canât have our princess being alone,â he chuckles again, letting go of your hands to squeeze your cheeks.Â
âMm, my makeup,â you mumble, prying his fingers off your cheeks. âAnd you can stay with me if you really want to,â you shrug, hiding your smug expression.Â
Jungkook scoffs, laughing as you put your sunglasses back on. âI changed my mind.â
âHey!â you exclaim, and before you get another word out, Jungkook is laughing, wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you in.
âIâm joking, now letâs go say hi to the Morganâs, theyâve been looking this way since Alex was here.â
âTheyâre probably just judging us,â you grumble.Â
Jungkook smiles, turning you around and walking with you. âMore reason to say hello.â
Most of the first day is spent the same way, greeting some families who you like and some who you donât but at least you get to do it with a glass of champagne and Jungkook by your side. By the early evening, everyone is settling into their cabins and exploring the cruise ship which feels more like a palace.Â
Itâs well past midnight when Jungkook is walking you to your cabin which unfortunately is on another level to yours â Alex mentioned he couldnât get your cabins closer since Jungkook was supposed to be joining later.
âI am so ready to knockout,â you yawn, pulling out the keycard.
âMake sure you donât forget to take your makeup off,â Jungkook says as a gentle reminder.
Turning around at the threshold of your door, you look at him as he leans against the wall opposite. âI wonât, and you donât forget to shower, you still stink of chlorine.â
Jungkook chuckles quietly, careful not to disturb any of the neighbouring cabins who are most likely asleep. Alias and him decided it would be fun to cannonball into the deck pool during prohibited hours and subsequently ended up running away from some of the cruise crew and you just happened to be with them even though you refused to jump in because itâs breaking the rules.
âIâm making you join us next time,â he says.
âThatâs never gonna happen.â
Smiling slightly, Jungkook tilts his head. âThat sounds like a challenge.â
Laughing, you step out of your room towards him. âI wouldnât try, Jeon.â Raising your hand, you pinch his nose. âYouâll just fail.â
âOr,â Jungkook raises his brows, taking your hand into his, âit could be one of the best nights you spend here, plus running away is fun,â he grins.Â
âYou call that fun?â you laugh.Â
âTell me it wasn't.â
You shrug. âI have fun whenever I'm with you anyway.âÂ
Jungkook smiles, and so do you. Itâs not hard to be honest around him, it never has been. Thatâs probably why youâve been best friends for so long. âSo all the time?â he says.Â
âAll the time,â you repeat, laughing.Â
Lips still holding a gentle smile, Jungkook looks down at you and for a second you wait for him to say something but he doesn't say anything. Instead, he releases a small sigh and pulls you into a hug.Â
You feel your body relax in his embrace, the weariness of todayâs jet lag and socialising and cheeky antics slowly melting away as you breathe in the comforting smell of his cologne. Even though itâs tainted with chlorine, his arms around you seem to make it worth putting up with.Â
His hands slide up your back, patting you softly. âIâll see you in the morning, hm.â
âJust donât wake me up before noon,â you mumble.
He laughs, pulling away. âBreakfast ends at 11.â
Groaning, you step towards your door again. âI wish Freddie was with us.â
Chuckling quietly, he starts to make his way towards his cabin. âGood night, Y/N.â
âNight,â you wave, seeing him disappear from view as the door closes. You almost collapse onto your bed but manage to trudge to the bathroom to wash off your makeup and get into your pyjamas before finally sinking into bed and falling asleep.
Knock knock knock
Knock knock.
âY/N?"
Knock knock knock. âY/N!â
Grumbling, you pull your pillow over your head.
Thereâs a few more impatient knocks before you hear Jungkook. âCome on, or Iâm going down without you.â
âGo,â you groan, tossing in bed. âIâll eat later.â
Then you hear a series of whining outside the door. âIt's already almost 11, it's embarrassing going by myself you have to come with me, please.â
With one final groan, you force yourself out of bed and open the door. âI said not before noon, Koo.â
âPlease,â he says, lips forming an effortless pout. âIâm hungry.â
Well you canât say no now. Sighing, you step aside for him to come in. âGive me twenty minutes.â
Jungkook slumps onto your bed, already dressed casually in a white tee and black shorts. âYou have ten.â
With Jungkook rushing you, you meet halfway and manage to get ready in 15 minutes instead. It seems the Cirilloâs spared no expense and managed to keep an entire upper deck private for all of the meals served on sea days. Thereâs a breakfast buffet laid out inside but before you can even grab yourself a plate, you see your mom frowning at you from her seat outside. She raises her brows and points to her wrist, her not so subtle way of reminding you youâre late.
With a big smile, you mouth sorry and she just laughs to herself, shaking her head.Â
âY/N,â Jungkook calls your name. You look over at him and heâs already standing behind a few people up for seconds, waiting his turn. Walking over, you take a plate and glance down at the table ahead of you.Â
âThis looks good,â you think out loud.Â
âIt does, doesnât it?â Jungkook says, glancing around. He frowns at something, moving his head to get a better look.Â
âWhat? Whatâs wroâ?â
His eyes widen and suddenly heâs crouching enough to remove the inches difference between you, hands gripping your arms. âHide me.â
âWhat?âÂ
âHide me,â he repeats, the insistence in his voice clearer than before.Â
Putting your plate down, you push his shoulders lower. âI am,â you whisper harshly. âBut why?â you say, glancing around.Â
âNo, donât look,â Jungkook says, his tone becoming something like a whine. âSheâll come over if she sees you.â
âWho?â
Jungkook groans, eyes closing. âWhy is she here?â
Ignoring his request not to look, you turn around and scan the room, looking for any familiar faces while your mind goes through a mental list of names of people who could make Jungkook want to hide before a whole breakfast buffet. Just as your name arrives at a potential suspect, the woman herself comes into your view.
âOh.âÂ
Tall, glamorous and even graceful, Valentina Forero struts her preppy, perfect figure, dressed head to toe in designer and a handbag so small youâre sure not even her phone can fit in there.Â
Immediately, you look away from her and down at Jungkook. Heâs already looking up at you with a weary expression. Your lips form an apologetic smile and he sighs, a string of curse words coming out from his mouth in the form of a hushed whisper while he stays pressed against your side trying to hide himself from view.
Of all the things that could possibly go wrong, this has to be the single worst thing.
Valentina is Jungkookâs ex friend with benefits of almost a year. They met shortly after college at your grad party and they started off as casual and eventually there were some feelings involved but they never really bloomed.Â
When Jungkook tried to end things after some months, Valentina had a lot to say and for some reason just didnât want to let him go even though she wasnât looking for something real.Â
You donât blame her, Jungkook attracts people like a magnet, but their relationship was a little more on the toxic side with some jealousy and so many stupid arguments no doubt stemming from the feelings that budded but never grew. It was better for both of them to call it quits, so they never made things official but to call Valentina anything less than an ex would be an injustice to some of the things they went through.
Stealing a glance at her again, you watch for a few seconds as she makes her way through the families, greeting each one with a bright smile.
As she moves, Jungkook moves too, trying to stay hidden from her view behind you. His head presses against your arm, cheek almost against your left boob.
âUm, Jungkook,â you say, smiling. âI get youâre trying to hide but uh, I donât think this is a good lookâŠâ
âWhat?â he says, still distracted as he glances towards where Valentina is.
âWeâre standing at a breakfast bar on a family cruise and your face is pretty close to my boobs.â
He looks up at you, eyes widening when he realises. âOh, sorry.â He stands straight, turning to face the bar instead.Â
âItâs cool,â you answer, picking up your plate again and nudging him to move forward. ââIâm sure weâve given the Collins something to talk about for today.â Turning to your right at the eyes ogling you, you smile plastically at Mr and Mrs Collins.
âSorry,â Jungkook mutters again absentmindedly as he slowly fills his plate.
âJungkook,â you say, nudging him again as you fill your own. âItâs gonna be fine, thereâs so many people here Iâm sure you wonât see each other that much, and even if you do, you have me.â Youâre already beaming when he looks at you, and his own eyes crease in the corners and he smiles too. âThanks. I guess youâre right but please donât ever let me be alone with her.â
âI wonât,â you laugh. âAlthough once she knows youâre here, Iâm sure sheâll try to hookup with you at least once.â
âI hope not,â Jungkook sighs. âSheâs not a bad girl but I just donât wanna go back there, yâknow?â
âMhm, I know,â you say, turning towards the table your parents are seated at. âBut what I donât know is how weâre gonna get to sit without her seeing you.â You nod in the direction of your parents.
Jungkook glances around. âLetâs go sit with Alex and Thalia,â he says, nodding in the opposite direction.
Stealthily, the two of you make your way out onto the deck and approach Alex and his fiancee unseen.
âOh, Y/N,â Thalia beams, leaning in for a hug as soon as she sees you. âYou look beautiful.âÂ
You snort. âI woke up half an hour ago, I definitely look awful.â
âAbsolutely not,â Thalia says with a gracious wave of her hand before Jungkook gets up to greet her too. âYou both look lovely and I'm so happy youâre here!â
âOf course,â you say, smiling at both her and Alex. âWeâre even happier to be here and so excited for you.â
âThank you, angel,â she winks.
âJungkook, are you okay?â Alex asks quietly, frowning as he watches Jungkook carefully. Glancing to your right, you also notice Jungkook is hunched over his food.
âYouâre just drawing more attention to yourself like that,â you let him know before turning back to Alex. âValentina is here,â you say with a small raise of your brow and both Alex and Thalia immediately let out a little âahâ.
Thalia winces apologetically when she glances back at Jungkook. âI do believe that may be on me. My mother is in the same club as her mother so it seems an invitation was deemed non-negotiable, unfortunately,â she adds, placing subtle emphasis on the last word.
Jungkook shakes his head. âDonât worry about it, I was gonna end up seeing her again eventually at some point.â
Alex coughs, his expression changing. âI do believe that time is coming sooner than you want though.â
Jungkook frowns but you understand what Alex means, as does Thalia as you both look up just in time to see Valentina a few feet away, approaching your table.
With a smile thatâs far too innocent for her, she stands at the edge of the table closest to Jungkook. âWell, hello there.â
Alex, being the sweetheart he is, is the first to respond to her greeting, and without surprise, Thalia follows quickly. âThank you for coming,â Alex says as he gives her a quick hug.
âThank you for having me.â Valentina steps to the side to greet Thalia too. âAnd congratulations, Iâm so happy for both of you!â
âThank you,â Thalia says with a genuine smile. As she takes her seat, you get up to greet her too.Â
âItâs nice to see you again, Val,â you say as you meet her in a brief hug, although you canât say you mean it but you hold no animosity towards her.Â
âYou too, Y/N,â she winks.Â
Before she even releases you, Jungkook is getting up and already avoiding eye contact with her. âHey,â he says, just as she leans towards him too.Â
âHello, Jungkook.â When she gives him a hug, itâs a little longer than your own but Jungkook doesnât push away despite his expression looking like he wants to.Â
Alex, Thalia and you have to fight to keep your smiles contained.
âGosh, itâs been so long, hasnât it?â Valentina says as she steps back and takes a seat.Â
âI guess,â Jungkook says, showing little expression as he sits back down and resumes eating his breakfast.Â
âOh, come on, itâs been almost two years.â She gives him a knowing expression before flicking her hair behind her shoulder with a flamboyant flair thatâs signature for Valentina. âIâm sure you missed me.â She leans her elbows on the table. âI know Iâve missed you.â
Seeing Jungkookâs constipated expression, you step in to help him out. âWe all missed you, Valentina,â you smile. âItâs impossible not to.â Thatâs not a lie either, although she was a big personality to deal with sometimes, she still knew how to have fun and was great to talk to.Â
âThank you, Y/N,â she says, returning your smile before turning her attention back to Jungkook. âYou still look as good as you always have too, Kookie.â She leans forward and squeezes his bicep, maybe one too many times. âYouâre still going to the gym I see.â
Jungkook stiffens next to you, meanwhile, your eyes are fixated on her hand on his arm. In a gesture of support, you discreetly slip your hand behind his elbow.Â
Sitting across from you, your friends both notice this. Then, the cogs in the brilliant mind of Alexander Cirillo turn and he comes up with what can only be a genius idea. Perhaps it's all the romance heâs been experiencing recently with his own fiancee, but Alex is convinced that this can only have one outcome, the only possible outcome â the one thatâs been written in the stars since Jungkook and you met so many years ago, heâs sure of it.
Beaming, Alex looks at Valentina. âDonât they look so good together?â
She pauses then frowns. âTogether?â
Your own expression matches Valentinaâs as you glance at Alex too.Â
âYes, together,â he repeats as a fact, smiling at Jungkook and you before looking at Valentina.
âYouâve heard, no? Jungkook and Y/N are together.â
From next to you, Jungkook swallows hard and your hand subconsciously tightens around his arm. Both of you are staring at Alex and he just gives you a subtle raise of his brow.Â
âOh, my,â Valentina smiles, and although thereâs some kind of genuinity to it, thereâs more you can see but havenât got the mental capacity to try to decipher right now when youâre still trying to figure out what Alex is doing.
 âI shouldâve known this was gonna happen, you always were inseparable,â she says with somewhat of an eye roll.Â
Jungkook laughs awkwardly, but heâs not stupid and he knows Alex isnât either. This is one surefire way he can keep Valentina and any of her advances away from him for the next three weeks. All he has to do is pretend to be dating you⊠how hard can that be?
âYeah, I guess it was meant to be,â he says, sounding a little stilted.Â
Youâre still sitting a little dumbfounded but Thalia also gives you an expression that tells you to improvise better. The most you can manage is a meek smile.Â
Jungkook responds almost as awkwardly, putting his arm around you which makes Alex laugh.
âOh, donât be so coy,â he says, sneaking in a wink to you as Valentinaâs eyes remain locked on you both. âItâs been almost what? Eight months?â
âUh, yeah, almost,â you answer, suddenly feeling shy with the way Jungkookâs hand is gripping your waist.Â
Itâs not like heâs never had his hand on your waist before â his face was all up in your boobs only fifteen minutes ago â but the feeling remains. It makes your cheeks go warm, your heart races a little faster and your fingers go fuzzy.Â
Youâre sure itâs showing on your face but Valentina doesnât seem to notice, or if she does, she must think itâs down to you finding this awkward.Â
âWell, congratulations to you too then,â she says, wearing a smile that doesnât actually seem anything less than genuine, but youâre aware thereâs more to her words.
âThank you,â Jungkook and you say in unison.Â
Valentina nods, taking it as her cue to leave. âIâll see you all around, and except for the engaged couple who get a pass, letâs keep the pda to a minimum please,â she adds airily, words directed to Jungkook and you as she saunters off.Â
âCanât promise anything with these two,â Alex calls out after her.
When he looks back at you, heâs grinning like the Cheshire Cat. Thalia purses her lips in a smile that resembles a child trying not to laugh while theyâre getting told off.Â
Turning to them, you burst. âWhat the hell was that?â you say hotly, seeming more flustered than anything else.Â
Alex shrugs. âSorry, it was the best thing I could think of.âÂ
âIt could be worse,â Thalia adds with a smile thatâs supposed to be apologetic but the gleam in her eyes tells you sheâs finding this just as amusing as her fiancĂ©.Â
Then, Jungkook shifts from beside you and only now do you realise youâre still holding his arm. âWell,â he says, briefly glancing down as you let go, âI guess weâre dating now.â
With a small raise of your brows, you shrug lightly and try not to show any signs of how flustered youâre feeling. âI guess so.â
When you meet his gaze, for a second you go still and think of what it means, how might you be expected to act with Jungkook â but really, it doesnât seem that much different from how you already are now. Except of course, if you ever had to indulge in any public displays of affection, cheek kisses, lingering hugs, maybe even a peck on the lipsâŠÂ Â
The thought of it all sets loose a swirl of butterflies in your stomach and only then do you realise that your gaze is still locked on Jungkook, and he too, is still staring at you.Â
With those butterflies still swarming, you abruptly break away from his gaze and notice the tips of his ears are turning pink. You wonder if heâs thinking the same as you right now.Â
âSee, already believable.â
Alexâs voice interrupts your thoughts and when you turn to flare at him, heâs got a smug smirk on his face.Â
âYouâre supposed to be smart,â you say with a sigh, pushing down the butterflies that it almost seems like Alex knows all about. âCouldnât have come up with something smarter?â
âThis is smart,â Alex says with a hint of sass.
âHow?â you sass back.Â
Leaning back, he puts his arm around Thalia as his smirk grows into a smile. âYouâll see, just give it some time,â he sighs, punctuating his sentence with a wink.Â
The end of the first night in Cartagena is celebrated with a formal dinner at a private venue with the most beautiful view of the coast.Â
The Cirilloâs had a special menu created of authentic foods from the town and the dishes were nothing less than exquisite. So much so that Alias and you are both slumped on a hammock on the balcony with bellies full and happy. A few of the guests walk past and side eye you both, probably because Alias has ungraciously undone the top button of his suit pants but it doesnât bother either of you.Â
âProbably shouldnât have eaten so much,â you mumble, looking up at the night sky.
âWeâve still got dessert,â Alias sighs, patting his belly.Â
âWell sitting there isnât going to help,â Jungkookâs voice says from behind you.Â
Turning your head, you smile when you see Jungkook with two dessert plates in his hand. He comes and sits next to you, handing one to each of you.
Alias still manages to devour his serving in silence, but you take a little longer to eat, wondering if Valentina might be somewhere near now that Jungkook is here; youâre certain sheâll be keeping a closer eye on you both so you ought to be making a conscious effort to act more like a couple but youâre not really sure what else to do. Jungkook bringing you dessert seems couple-ish enough, even though itâs what you would do on a usual night anyway.
The three of you fall into a comfortable silence and you give Alias the rest of your dessert to finish as you collapse into the hammock again. As you do so, you feel Jungkookâs hand brush against yours and immediately you glance down at your hands, noticing how your arms and thighs are touching too. Again, itâs nothing unusual for you, but you start to wonder why it feels a little different now youâve noticed it.
âDonât look now,â he says, voice barely a murmur, âbut sheâs watching us.â
When you hum quietly in acknowledgement, his fingers brush the back of yours tentatively again and for some reason unrelated to the wind thatâs blowing, you feel your skin prickling. Releasing a small breath, Jungkook curls his hand, fingers slipping between yours. The pads of your fingers press against him and you return your focus to the night sky above rather than the weird way your heart is beating now.
From your other side, Alias lets out a satisfied sigh before sitting back beside you. âSo,â he says without missing a beat, âwhatâs up between you guys?â
âHm?â You look at him with a small frown.
âYou heard me,â he repeats with the signature boyish grin that he and his brother share. Itâs enough to let you know that he knows.
âWeâre, uh, together,â Jungkook answers.
Alias snorts. âYou gotta sound more convincing than that, Jungkook.â
âIâd like to see you pretend to date someone,â you say, nudging his side.
Shifting to face you, Alias raises a brow. âThatâs easy, watch and learn, lover boy.â He leans closer, arm moving across your chest to touch some hair behind your ears.
You get his point â Alias is close enough to lean in and kiss you if he wanted to, and the small action seems intimate enough since youâre almost laying down with him beside you.
His hand gently traces down your cheek and you giggle, finding it funny as he keeps glancing at Jungkook who shoves him back before he goes any further.
âAlright, I get it,â Jungkook says, somehow shifting even closer to you.
When you glance at him, you canât help but giggle at his expression. He looks a little annoyed, and although you donât think it, anyone else might think heâs crossed the fine line to jealous â Alias certainly does.Â
âAlright, I know, hands off your girlfriend,â he says, raising his hands in surrender.Â
Rolling his eyes, Jungkook mutters, âYeah, whatever.â
Alias just chuckles, leaning back and resting his palm behind his head but unlucky for him, his moment of rest is short lived.Â
âOh for goodness sake Alias!â The hushed whisper of Mrs Cirillo has all of your heads turning. She appears out of nowhere beside the hammock, a look of shock and horror on her face. âIs there a reason youâre basking in the sunset with your trousers half undone?âÂ
âActually,â Alias says unbothered, holding up a finger, âonly the zipper is undone, so by the length of the trousers, mother, theyâre nowhere near half undone.âÂ
Frustrated, she glances around. âPeople must be thinking all sorts.â She looks at Jungkook and you who smile awkwardly, sitting up straight as you hope not to get scolded.Â
Mrs Cirillo is no stranger when it comes to teaching etiquette and given the many years of friendship between your families, sheâs definitely not a stranger to teaching you a few things, and over the years, Jungkook too.Â
She sighs when she looks at you. âDarling, you look beautiful. Jungkook, you too, please teach my son a thing or two.â She sighs again impatiently and Alias grumbles next to you as he does up his zipper. âNow, when youâve made yourself decent, please come with me, your father wants you to meet someone,â she says, not waiting for a response.
Alias groans. âWho? I thought I had met them all.â
âNot this one,â Mrs Cirillo replies airily as sheâs still walking away. âHeâs just joined us tonight.â
Like the dutiful son he is, Alias gets up and follows his mother, though not without groaning about it some more.
Jungkook and you watch him go, but just like Alias, your moment of rest is short lived.
âUm, Y/NâŠâ Jungkookâs voice sounds apprehensive and when you look at him, his expression seems the same. Heâs stretching his neck and looking out towards the opposite direction of the balcony towards the main hall. âIs that⊠Valentina, with your parents?â
Standing up to get a better look, you realise that Jungkook is right. Valentina is mid-way greeting your parents, your mom leaning in to give her a hug.Â
Looking down at Jungkook, you both realise at the same time â your parents donât know about the two of you.Â
Jungkook doesnât wait for you to say anything and instead â with zero regard for the high heels on your feet â he grabs your hand and rushes you towards them.
âOw, wait, Jungkook, slow down!â
âCanât,â he says, although you feel his pace slow down a little. âSheâs gonna say something, of course she is.â
Jungkook isnât wrong and the look on your parents face as youâre less than a few feet away from them tells you that Valentina has just said it. Your dad looks confused and your mom is frowning, her head tilting in the way it does when sheâs not sure she believes something.
âMom!âÂ
She turns her head to the sound of your voice, as does Valentina and your father.
âDad,â you smile, catching your breath as Jungkook and you stop in front of them.Â
Jungkook chuckles awkwardly next to you and you feel his hand go around your waist. âSorry to, uh, interruptâŠâ he purposely avoids Valentinaâs gaze. âWe just, uh,â he glances at you, âwe had a question.âÂ
âWell, so do we,â your dad starts, looking at you with the same confused expression. âWhatââ
âThe dresses for the couple dance!â you blurt, knowing exactly what your father was about to ask. It would totally blow your cover if it seemed like your parents didnât know about Jungkook so you need to come up with something fast. âWe need to know the colours of the dresses for the coupleâs dance, for the wedding.â
If your dad looked confused before, he looks almost dumbfounded now. âA coupleâs dance?â
âY/N, what couple dance?â your mom asks somewhat impatiently and youâre certain she wants to ask the same question your dad was about to, which is most likely about Jungkook and you.
âThe one for the wedding,â Jungkook answers for you. âAll the couples are doing a dance after Alex and Thalia, you know? At the wedding.â He squeezes your waist gently and you chuckle.
âExactly,â you say, taking your mom's hand discreetly. âSince Jungkook and I are dancing together, well, he needs to know the colour of my dress and Iâve forgotten.â You say it with no hesitation but with the way youâre squeezing her hand repeatedly, your mom still seems confused.
She glances at Valentina who is now staring at Jungkookâs hand right around your waist, before glancing back at you.Â
Taking advantage of Valentinaâs momentary lapse in attention, you give her a subtle raise of your brow and hope that mother-daughter telepathy is a real thing.Â
âA coupleâs dance?â your father asks again. âHoney, I didnât know about this,â he says to your mom.Â
âWell, yes, I suppose I forgot to tell you,â she says, squeezing your hand back and you let out a grateful sigh of relief, as does Jungkook.Â
âY/N, your dress is periwinkle blue for the party,â she says to you before looking at Jungkook. You can see the apprehension in her expression though itâs only noticeable to you. âJungkook, sweetheart, Iâll make sure your suit is matching with Y/Nâs of course.â
âThank you,â he nods, lips pursed.Â
Together, you glance at Valentina who already seems bored.Â
âWell, Iâll come find you later, Mrs L/N,â she says, already turning to step away.Â
Your mom says a quick goodbye before Jungkook and you are left alone with her and your dad.Â
âIs there a reason I didnât know about this couple's dance?â
Letting out a small laugh, Jungkook pats your dad's shoulder. âSorry, we made that up, there isnât a coupleâs dance.â
âThere isnât?â
âNo, there isnât,â your mom answers, her brow raises as she looks between Jungkook and you. âBut what I would like to know is why we just had to lie and why on earth is Valentina congratulating your father and I about you two and your relationship?â
âItâs because of me,â Jungkook answers immediately which prompts a look of surprise from your parents. âI just wanted an easy way to keep away from Valentina and saying Iâm with Y/N was the best way for me to do it.â He lowers his head looking a bit ashamed.Â
âWell it was actually Alex who said it first,â you say, stepping forward. âHe pretty much roped us into it with Valentina right there, we were clueless.â You take Jungkookâs arm and smile at your parents. âItâs just a little white lie and honestly as long as Jungkook and I are okay with it, then itâs harmless.â
âAnd you are okay with it?â your dad asks.Â
âSure.â
Your mother frowns, the apprehension still not having left her expression. âAnd Jungkook⊠youâre okay with it too?â
Jungkook nods. âVery okay with it.â
âAlright then, but just be wary.â Your mom glances between you both. She opens her mouth as if to say more but shakes her head instead. âWho else knows?â
âAlex, Thalia, Alias, and now you both.â
âHm, if you want to keep it a secret then I would keep it to that. The more people who know the more likely it is to come out.â
âYes, I agree,â your dad says, frowning as he thinks. âAlthough I do think it would make sense to tell Leon and Helena.â
Your mom agrees with him. âI suppose it does but itâs up to you both.â
âAre you sure?â you ask, brows raising. Itâs not unusual for your parents to share something with the Cirilloâs, but when itâs something like this, a lie, you donât imagine your parents telling them.
Jungkook shuffles awkwardly. âUh, theyâre coming over now.â
Your mom looks up, smiling as they come over. âYes, Y/N, after all itâs not really such a big lie. Jungkook and you do everything together anyway, how much more different can this be?â
âRight,â you nod, confused by the sentiment those words make you feel â perhaps Alex isnât so wrong, maybe you do do everything with Jungkook. It must be giving the wrong idea to peopleâŠÂ
Though that doesnât matter now since you need to seem like youâre dating him.Â
âJust who I was looking for,â Mrs Cirillo beams as she approaches, but instead of looking at your mom, sheâs looking at you.
âMe?â you ask, surprised.Â
âYes.â She looks at Jungkook too. âAnd you.â
Jungkook shares the same expression as you. âMe?â
âOh, yes, and donât act so shy either of you.â Her smile seems rather cheeky, as does Mr Cirilloâs who stands beside her. âWhatâs this I hear about you two dating now, hm?â
âOh.â Smiling hesitantly, you prepare yourself to tell them the truth as well. This feels a bit different though because you can see the excitement in Mrs Cirilloâs face, even in Mr Cirillo.Â
âI mean itâs about time,â Mr Cirillo says with a deep chuckle, looking at your parents to agree.Â
Jungkook looks rather pained as he looks between them both. âWho told you?â
âAlias, of course,â Mrs Cirillo says. âHe said youâve been keeping it a secret for some time though I donât see why, this is wonderful news!âÂ
She waves her hand with the statement and with it, a part of you suddenly feels like youâre being let down by yourself. Itâs odd to see them so happy for Jungkook and you, only for it not to be real.Â
You donât blame them though â youâve only been pretending to date Jungkook for a day but youâre already starting to see Alexâs point a little bit more. Having Jungkook by your side just feels right.Â
Come to think of it, if anyone else asked you to pretend to be their girlfriend for a few weeks, youâd definitely say no. It would be hard to act so close with someone not only emotionally but physically, whereas thinking of the way Jungkook was so close to your side just a little while ago on the hammock, fingers curled around yours, you feel yourself coil at even the thought of being with anyone else.Â
Thatâs not unusual though, right? The only reason you canât imagine it with anyone else is because Jungkook is your best friend. Heâs the guy youâre most comfortable around and so you feel safe with him. Thoughts pausing, your gaze drifts to him as you briefly zone out from whatever joke Mrs Cirillo is making.Â
Jungkook still looks on hesitantly and the way his bottom lip moves, you can tell heâs waiting to say something. As soon as he sees his chance and quickly gets a word in. âOh, well, actually, Mrs Cirillo, itâs not really real.â
She looks towards him and frowns a little. âWhat do you mean?â Thereâs disappointment in her tone that you (for some unknown reason) can relate to.
âItâs more of a make believe relationship, if thatâs one way to put it,â your dad answers albeit looking confused himself.Â
Mr Cirillo appears to be on the same brainwave as your dad as he looks confused too. âThatâs absurd. I believe it very much.â
âYes, yes,â Mrs Cirillo says, nodding. âWho wouldnât?â
Pushing aside your own confused feelings, you help clear up this mess. âWhat weâre trying to say is that itâs not a real relationship.â You glance at Jungkook who looks at you and nods. âWeâre just pretending to date.â
âOh.â Their expressions fall, small frowns replacing the excitement in their eyes.Â
âWhy would you do that?â Mr Cirillo asks.Â
âMy ex is on the cruise,â Jungkook answers. âYou probably remember her, Valentina?âÂ
Thereâs a few seconds of quiet until Mr Cirillo finds the name familiar. âAh, yes, tall girl, Forero if Iâm not mistaken?â
Jungkook nods, lips pursed.Â
âSo sheâs the reason youâre doing this?â Mrs Cirillo gestures between Jungkook and you.Â
Jungkook nods again.Â
She sighs quietly. âHonestly, it all seems a bit fuddy duddy, Valentina is harmless. Thereâs better ways to keep someone away, Jungkook, wouldnât it be better to just ask her to stay away from you?â
âThat might come across as more rude than this,â you say with a shrug. âAlso, we ought to mention that this was all Alexâs idea.â
âAlex?!â Mrs Cirillo exclaims. âDid he even ask you first?â
âNope,â you shake your head with a smile having absolutely no qualms throwing your best friend under the bus.Â
âOh, why didnât you say so sooner?â Mrs Cirillo turns and reaches for her husband's hand. âLeon, I do believe that boy is getting almost as troublesome as his older brother.â
Mr Cirillo laughs. âOh, itâs just a little fun, besides, having Jungkook and Y/N pretending to play house canât be all that bad.â He turns to Jungkook and you and winks.
You return his cheek with a smile. âItâs actually easier than it looks.â
âIâm sure it is,â he quips with a quick raise of his brow. His smirk seems telling but you donât think anything of it at the moment as you feel Jungkookâs hand on your arm.
âJust donât tell anyone please,â he says, chuckling nervously.
âOf course not,â Mrs Cirillo says. âI think Alex may have been onto something anyway.â She glances towards your mom and they share a smile. âLetâs get something to drink, hm?â
Your mom laughs, taking her arm. âYes, please, I need one.â
Together, they walk off and to you it looks like theyâre high schoolers sharing secrets again â youâre sure theyâre going to have lots to talk about again today.Â
Mr Cirillo chuckles as they go off. âThree guesses what theyâre talking about,â he says quietly to your dad who shares a smile with his friend before they both turn to Jungkook and you.
âWell, I think Iâm going to go and look for more dessert,â you say, slowly taking a step back to excuse yourself and Jungkook.Â
âYeah, Iâm gonna do that too,â Jungkook says, nodding his head at your dad and Mr Cirillo.
âOf course, Iâll see you later on,â your dad smiles. His eyes fall to where Jungkookâs hand is holding your arm and his smile grows just a little wider but before you can think anything of it, Mr Cirillo makes a comment.
âThatâs a nice suit youâre wearing, Jungkook.â He nods, looking visibly impressed.
âThanks.â
Mr Cirillo continues. âI remember when you would wear your suits from those high street stores with the cheap labels but look at you now, kid.â
Pausing in your slow retreat, you blink. Youâve known Mr Cirillo all your life so you know that the comment really holds no ill intent, and also bearing in mind the fact that you know just how much he has come to admire Jungkook and cares for him as much as he does for you, but that doesnât mean itâs okay for Mr Cirillo to make a comment like that.
Jungkook only smiles, though he doesnât need to say anything for anyone to see that the backhanded compliment isnât appreciated. He continues to step away but now youâre rooted firmly in the spot.
âWell with a personality like his and far more brains than most people combined, Jungkook has never needed material to make him look good, wouldnât you agree, Mr Cirillo?â Your expression is friendly enough but your tone? Not so much.
He smiles awkwardly, immediately having understood his mistake. âDoes that mean the opposite for myself?â he asks lightly.
âOh, Iâve never thought so,â you say, smiling plastically. âThose words came from your own mouth.â
Mr Cirillo laughs. âYouâre a sharp one, Y/N. That's why I like you a lot.â
âLikewise, Leon,â you wink, reaching for Jungkookâs arm. âNow weâll be off.â
Mr Cirillo still chuckles and you catch your dad smiling at you as you walk away with Jungkook.
âDid you just call him ugly?â Jungkook asks with a small laugh once you're out of earshot.Â
âI didnât call him anything,â you shrug.
He laughs again, coming to a stop with you near the dessert table where you both browse the selection. âYou know I couldâve answered myself though,â he says after a moment.Â
Taking your pick, you turn to him with a small pout. Itâs not the first time someone has made a comment about Jungkook that has annoyed you more than him, and you know that Jungkook prefers to pick and choose his battles wisely, unlike you always feeling as though you have to say something.Â
âI know, sorry,â you wince a little. âForce of habit.â
âItâs okay,â he smiles, taking a bowl of Eton mess.Â
Together, you start walking towards the same hammock you were previously sitting at.
âI actually think itâs kinda cute,â he adds.
Your brows raise inquisitively. âHaving me as your knight in shining armour?â
He shrugs, taking a spoonful into his mouth as you both sit down. âMore like my princess with her many privileges.â His lips curl into a smile as he says it.
Laughing, you lean back comfortably into the hammock. âWell, of course, Mr Cirillo wouldnât dare say anything to me.â
âAnd no one else other than you would insult Mr Cirillo to his face.â
Holding up your fork, you laugh again. âI only implied, thereâs a difference.â
Jungkook hums, leaning back next to you. He takes a big spoonful into his mouth, eating this slowly while you steal some of his. Swallowing, he sits up a little beside you. âYou know, you donât have to do this if you donât want to.â
Looking up at him, you frown. âDo what?â
âPretend to date me.â
âWhy wouldnât I want to?â
He shrugs. âIf it makes you uncomfortable, or even if you just donât want to.â
âI donât mind,â you say, sitting up with him.
He doesnât say anything for a few seconds, watching your expression for any signs of a lie. âYou sure?â
âIâm sure,â you repeat.
With those words, Jungkook seems to relax. âOkay.â Faint traces of a smile appear on his face as he leans back.Â
âThe soap here smells amazing,â Thalia says, bringing her hands to her nose to sniff again a few times after drying them.Â
Tossing your used hand towel in the hamper, you take a sniff too. âMm, it does. I smell coconut.â
âAnd yuzu,â Thalia says, still inhaling the smell.Â
Laughing, you pull her hands away from her nose as you walk out of the washroom together.Â
The corridor is dimly lit as you walk back towards the restaurant but youâre very impressed by the interior, the burgundy and golden interior of this part of the venue complimenting each other well, especially with the many plants lining the corridors.Â
âWhereâs Alex?â you ask.
âSomewhere around here,â Thalia answers. âHonestly I lost him an hour ago after he went to check out the golf course here.â
âThereâs a golf course here?â you ask, surprised. Though really you donât know why youâre surprised, walking to the bathroom was a mission on its own, this place is huge.Â
âYeah they have everything, tennis courts, basketball, thereâs even a riding school.â
At that, your ears perk up. âAre the horses available to hire?â
Thalia turns to you with a smile. âYou wanna go for a canter?â
âCan we?â You ask, eyes lighting up too. âOh, itâs been so long since Iâve been riding.â
âWeâll have to ask but Iâm sure my dad could sort something out for us. Although we have booked a resort for when we get to Barcelona and later on in Malta too. Theyâre renowned for their riding instructors.â
Laughing, you walk around the next corner together. âHow have you booked resorts while weâre on a cruise? I bet Mrs Cirillo had something to do with it,â you add, knowing that she always has to have everything and the best of it for her kids.
Thalia nods with a smile. âMy mom and yeah, Helena. Theyâve been planning this for a year, of course thereâs going to be something for everyone.âÂ
âStrippers?â you ask, brows raising.
âExcept that.â
âHm, fair,â you say, frowning as you walk around another corner. âAnyway, I donât really care for the instructors but itâll have to be Barcelona. I just wanna ride, itâs been so long since I last went.â
Thalia agrees. âSure, Iâll ask my dad, Iâm pretty sure heâs already friends with the owner of the one in Barcelona so it should be easy.â
âGreat,â you smile, excited by the thought, though your smile turns into a frown as you realise youâre walking by the same door you just walked out of a little while ago.Â
At the same time, Thalia slows down. âAre we lost?â she asks.
Looking up at the womenâs washroom sign, your frown deepens. âYeah, I think weâve just gone in a circle.â You look up and down the corridor, taking a few steps in the opposite direction from which you just came to follow a different path. âMaybe we should try going left from here instead?â
âThere really should be a clearer exit,â Thalia huffs. âMy feet hurt.â
Laughing, you glance back at her. âI donât think anyone was taking into account the fact that people might be walking in 6-inch heels down these corridorsâ oh.â Mid-sentence, you bump into someone as youâre walking around the next corner. âSorry,â you say, looking up at the guy as you feel steady hands on your arms to stop you from stumbling.Â
âIâm so sorry,â he says at the same time, looking down.
Oh.Â
His brows knit together before a smile breaks out on his face. âY/N?â
âLawrence!â A smile appears on your face embarrassingly fast. âHi!â
He chuckles softly, taking a step back and taking his hands with him. You donât know whether to appreciate the sweetness or be sad theyâre gone.
Lawrence Goldman is one of the most beautiful men youâve ever laid eyes on with a personality to match, and he was your high school crush for years. He was everyoneâs crush to be honest, but even in uni, you never were able to stop swooning over him, but thatâs all itâs ever been, a crush. For some reason, you could never let yourself take it further despite him showing interest a few times.Â
âItâs been so long, my gosh, how are you?â he asks, eyes skimming your figure. âYou look absolutely amazing,â he adds without a second thought.
âHey again,â Thalia says, appearing beside you.
Lawrence gives her a smile, his attention quickly returning to you.
âIâm great,â you beam, âhow are you? Iâm surprised to see you, I thought you were working in Singapore?â
âI am,â he nods before looking at Thalia. âWell I was, but there was no way I was gonna miss this oneâs wedding.â
Thalia laughs, putting her arm around him briefly. âLove you for it, Goldie.â
Lawrence rolls his eyes at the nickname and you smile. Thalia and Lawrence attended the same prep school before reuniting in college, and itâs through Lawrence that Thalia was introduced to Alex and the rest of you â your world is apparently a very small world so Lawrence being here really shouldnât be a surprise to you, but with everything else going on, you may have forgotten about Lawrence.Â
âIâve only just joined because I had a meeting I couldnât miss yesterday,â he adds, eyes skimming down your figure once more while he thinks youâre still smiling at Thalia but you definitely donât miss it.Â
âAh, I see.â You canât help it when you mirror his actions, noting how the top two buttons of his shirt are undone, giving a peak of the chain heâs always worn since he Longbottom-ed â he clearly knows the effect it has. âSo youâre joining us for the rest of the cruise?â When your eyes meet his again, his lips curl into a smirk.Â
âYes,â he nods. âIâll be here.â
Noticing Thalia glancing between you both, you realise you ought to stop whatever weirdness is going on right now before she thinks thereâs something between you, not that she wonât ask you herself anyway.Â
âWell thatâs great,â you smile, taking a step closer to Thaliaâs side.
âMhm, Iâm looking forward to spending time with you,â he says.
Your response is on the top of your tongue â âso am Iâ â and you intend to say it with a flutter of your lashes, but before you can say anything, Thalia answers for you.Â
âWe all are,â she grins, hand winding around your waist where she squeezes with a light force when she says the next words. âIncluding Jungkook and Alex.â
For a second youâre confused but the mention of Jungkook sparks your memory and you remember everything thatâs happened in the past few days.
Jungkook and you are dating â you realise now why Thalia interjected and she was right to do so, otherwise you mightâve made a silly mess by opening yourself up to flirting with Lawrence.Â
âOh, yes,â you answer, perking up. âJungkook will definitely be happy to see you Iâm sure, itâs been a while since we all met last.â
âYeah?â Lawrence casually responds.Â
âOf course,â Thalia says with a wiggle of her brows. âY/N is his girlfriend, she would know of course.â
As you smile dutifully, you catch the confusion briefly show on Lawrenceâs face before he quickly disguises it as surprise. âYou and Jungkook?â he says, lips turning into a smile. Itâs the kind of smile that could mean many things.Â
âYep,â you nod, lips pursed in a smile.Â
Something resembling a sigh leaves him. âYou guys will have to catch me up on that for sure,â he says.
âThereâll be lots to catch you up on,â Thalia grins, âbut right now, can we figure out how to get out of here?â
Lawrence chuckles, stepping to the side. âOf course, I know the way.â He gestures towards the left, waiting for you and Thalia to pass.Â
As you fall into stride with Thalia on one side and Lawrence on the other side, you canât help but feel some kind of disappointment at Lawrenceâs reaction, though what did you expect?Â
Of course heâs not going to say or do anything differently, and as long as youâve agreed to be Jungkookâs girlfriend, you shouldnât want him to react any differently. Youâre lucky Thalia stepped in when she did or you mightâve completely forgotten youâre supposed to be in a relationship with someone else and wouldâve ended up blowing the story for Jungkook entirely.Â
âAh, here we are!â Thalia skips forward out into the late evening night.
The view on the balcony now is even more beautiful with fairy lights adorning the trees along its perimeter. Everyone you recognise seems to be congregating towards one area as itâs almost time to leave to board the cruise ship again.Â
âOh there you are.â Jungkook appears from the middle of the crowd, not seeming to have noticed Lawrence whoâs more closely following Thalia. âWeâre leaving soon, here.â He hands you your purse you left with him a while earlier.Â
âThanks,â you answer, taking it and checking you havenât left anything else. âSorry, we got a bit lost inside.â
âMhm, thatâs fine, I was just about to come look for you anyway,â Jungkook says, looking at Thalia and only then does he notice Lawrence. The lines expressing concern in his face deepen into confusion.
Seeing this change, Lawrence smiles. âHey mate.â
In a split second Jungkookâs confused frown changes to a smile. âLawrence!â Reaching forward, the two share a pleasant exchange.Â
âItâs been a while, howâve you been?â
âNot bad, yourself?â
Jungkook nods. âIâve been alright.â
âBetter than alright from what I hear,â Lawrence says, brow raising as he glances in your direction.Â
Jungkookâs gaze follows and you smile with a little shrug, subtly nodding at Jungkook.
âAh.â Jungkook chuckles, taking a step towards your side. âWell, yeah, better than alright,â he confirms with a very believable smile.Â
Lawrence laughs, looking between you. From behind him, you catch Thalia standing beside Alex as they watch the interaction play out.Â
âI think itâs amazing,â Lawrence says, patting Jungkookâs arm. âYou two are great together.â
âYouâve only just seen us again,â you say with a smile.Â
âHm, Iâve seen it for years,â Lawrence replies with a nod of his head and a small sigh as he looks at you. Heâs still smiling but when you look at him, the brightness in his eyes has faded. âTrust me,â he says quieter than before, âI was always watching.â
Pursing your lips, you smile but you still feel self conscious as his gaze on you doesnât budge. âThat sounds a little stalker-ish, Lawrence,â you chuckle.Â
Laughing, he shrugs. âMightâve been. I always was a bit of a recluse.â
âI wouldnât say you were a recluse.â
He arches his brow, lips morphing into a cocky smile. âThen what would you say I was?â
Mirroring his expression, you scoff. âWhat dâyou want me to say, huh? Tall, handsome and mysterious?â
âTook the words right from my mouth,â he says smugly.Â
âHa,â you laugh. Despite it being somewhat true, you respond to say otherwise. âYou wish.â
Lawrence smiles. âAh, I guess those words are reserved for this one, huh?â He nods towards Jungkook.Â
âHmâŠâ you look towards Jungkook who smiles with his lips pursed. Itâs not his usual full smile and behind it there seems to be a reservation that tells you heâs being more quiet than usual. Nudging him gently, you beam when he meets your eyes. âNah, Iâve got better words for this one.â
He nods and chuckles quietly but only briefly.Â
You wonder whatâs caused the shift in his mood since he seemed so bright only a moment ago when greeting Lawrence.Â
âOh, youâll have to tell me all about it, Iâm interested to hear how things happened between you,â Lawrence says.
Humming quietly, you nod as your attention remains on Jungkook. âSome other time, I think we need to get moving now,â you say, nodding towards the crowd of moving guests ahead of you.Â
âAh, yes,â he answers, turning to look behind him. âIâll see you around though, yeah?â He places his hand on your arm.Â
You donât pay much attention to it but feel Jungkook pull on your hand gently.Â
âYeah man, weâll see you around,â he says, reaching to pat Lawrenceâs arm.Â
Lawrence nods, throwing you a smile before he turns and joins the rest of your party.Â
As he walks away, Jungkook turns to you. âShall we go too?â
You nod, allowing him to lead the way, hand still in yours. Thereâs a hum of conversation around you as everyone makes their way back towards the cars to take you to the port, but youâre grateful no one interrupts the two of you as you walk alone, a little behind the rest.Â
âYou okay?â you ask after a quiet moment.Â
Jungkook answers almost right away. âYeah. You?â
âMhm.â You watch him as he kicks some of the sand beneath his feet with every step. âYou sure though?â
He turns to look at you, a smile on his lips though his brows furrow a little in the middle. âYeah, why?â
âJust,â you shrug. âI thought you seemed a bit quiet back there with Lawrence.â
Jungkook turns away and shrugs. âIâm all good, no reason not to be.âÂ
Itâs not exactly convincing to you, but you take his word for it. If itâs something he wants to tell you, heâll tell you in his own time if he wants to. Or, itâs actually just nothing and youâre overthinking this for no reason. After all, there is no explanation that you can think of for Jungkook to be upset with Lawrence, especially when he was so happy to see him just now. Yes, youâre just overthinking it.Â
âY/N, Jungkook, please be on time for breakfast tomorrow and not an hour late like last time,â your mother scolds airily as she waves her hand behind her.Â
âYes, mom,â you smile as she turns into her cabin.Â
âWill do,â Jungkook nods, raising a hand to say good night to your parents.Â
Once their door is closed, Jungkook continues to walk with you towards your cabin.Â
âYou better wake up earlier this time,â you yawn, pulling out your key card.Â
Jungkook scoffs, coming to a stop next to your door. âMe?!â He rests his hand against the door frame, leaning closer. âYouâre the one who was still sleeping when I came down.â
Smiling, you shake your head. âYou have no proof.â
He matches your smile, cocking his head. âAlright, Iâm recording you tomorrow morning, donât get mad at me when I get your bed head and dried dribble face on camera.â
âHey,â you pout, leaning against the door frame. âI donât dribble.â
Jungkook shrugs, smiling. âTomorrow Iâll have proof.â
You narrow your eyes at him, internally vowing to wake up early so you can be ready before he comes to you. âThereâs noââ
âOh, Jungkook, Y/N!âÂ
The sickeningly sweet cotton candy voice has your smile faltering. Jungkook winces, his face hidden from Valentina as she approaches from behind you.Â
Slowly, you turn around to face her.
âWell isnât this just perfect,â she beams, coming to stop beside you both. âWeâre neighbours here!âÂ
Chuckling, you nod your head. âThat really is perfect.âÂ
Valentine smiles again, glancing between the two of you before shrugging. âWell,â she sighs, opening her purse to look for her key card. âDonât mind me, I was just grabbing a few things. You two enjoy your night.â She waves airily but doesnât move.Â
âMhm, you too,â you nod.Â
As she pulls out her key card, sheâs just about to walk away before she pauses to focus on Jungkook and a delicate frown appears on her face.Â
Glancing at him, youâre not surprised to see sheâs frowning. Jungkook hasnât said a word and he looks rather pained right now.
âJungkook, are you okay?â She tilts her head. âYou look a littleâŠâ She steps closer, frown deepening as she moves until all of a sudden she stops. âOh.â Her eyes widen, an apologetic pout appearing on her face. âI see, was I interrupting something?â She asks, pointing between you both.Â
For a second youâre confused â yes, she interrupted your conversation with Jungkook and she knows that already â but then you remember that youâre supposed to be in a romantic relationship with Jungkook, and the expression on Valentina's face tells you she thinks sheâs interrupted something else.Â
Jungkook is obviously just as confused. âHuh?â
âYouâre both going to bed now, are you not?â
He frowns. âUh, yeahâŠâ
âYes, I thought so. Apologies thenâŠâ She glances down towards Jungkookâs crotch as the words that follow imply it â âoh, sorry, I mustâve put that fire out.â
A strangled noise escapes Jungkookâs throat and he looks relatively mortified. âWhat?â no!â He takes a step closer to your side while you somehow pull him closer to your side protectively in an attempt to hide him from her.Â
Valentina doesnât respond to the expressions on neither of your faces and only sighs disappointedly, flipping her hair behind her shoulder. âI remember there was a time when I was the one to ignite the fire in your loins.â
The same strangled noise comes from Jungkook and you have to stop from bursting out into laughter.Â
âVal,â Jungkook says, âwere you not going somewhere?â
âOh, yes.â She perks up, smiling brightly again. âWell you two lovebirds go ahead.âÂ
Just when you expect her to walk away, she doesnât. In fact she stands there waiting for Jungkook and you to go into what she thinks is your shared cabin.Â
âWe will,â Jungkook says with the fakest smile youâve seen on him.
Valentina only nods, still waiting.
Jungkook is about to say something again but you know thereâs no point. Unlocking your door, you pull him into your room with you. âBye, Val.â
âGood night,â you hear her respond as the door closes shut.Â
Turning around to face Jungkook, you look at him with an expression crossed between shock and amusement. âOh my God, how did you ever date her?!â
Jungkook groans, collapsing face down onto the end of your bed. âI swear she isnât that bad, sheâs doing it on purpose,â he says, muffled into the sheets.
Humming, you sit at the end of your bed beside him. âI guess so.â You lie down so youâre level with him.
Lying beside him, itâs quiet for a moment as you replay the exchange in your head. âSo, she mustâve really been something if she was igniting the fire in your loins.â You canât help but snort after saying it and Jungkook laughs beside you too, head still buried.Â
Now that Valentina isnât here, you allow yourself to laugh at it and youâre glad Jungkook does too. By the time youâre done laughing at it, youâre wiping away tears.
Lifting his head, he shakes his head. âThis isnât gonna be easy,â he says.Â
âYeah, she really doesnât make it easy,â you respond quietly.Â
Both of you fall silent for a moment again, listening carefully to see if you can hear her footsteps.Â
âI canât hear her anymore,â Jungkook says.
âMe neither.â You turn to look at him.Â
He props himself up on his elbows. âSo what now?â
âWell, we could wait till she goes away and then you sneak out,â you think aloud. âBut how are we gonna do that every night?â
Jungkook nods, understanding. âSo I should just stay?â
âIâm cool with it if you are,â you shrug.
For a moment, Jungkook doesnât say anything, then he looks at you with a soft frown creasing his forehead. âAre you sure?â
âTotally sure,â you nod, rolling onto your side to lean on your elbow. âBesides, itâs not like weâve made things easy for ourselves,â you add with a laugh.Â
The lines seem to have disappeared from Jungkookâs face but when your eyes search for some kind of clue to his feelings, you find something you canât decipher hiding behind the brown of his eyes.Â
He smiles, releasing a soft breath as he does so, and only now do you realise how close your face is to his.Â
âPromise me youâll tell me if you feel uncomfortable?â he says.Â
Nodding, you lift your pinky finger.Â
He raises his own hand and closes his own pinky finger around yours.Â
âI will,â you promise him.
His smile grows and oddly, you feel your heart do a little flutter in your chest as a warm feeling spreads through you. Youâre suddenly reminded of how you felt earlier on in the evening as you lay on the balcony with Jungkook⊠has he always made you feel this way? Before you can let yourself think about it, Jungkook is leaping off the bed and with him, the feeling disappears.Â
âSo, I donât plan on having your mum tell me off tomorrow morning so Iâm going to sleep.â He turns to look at you, placing his hand on his hips. âSlight problem though, my clothes are in my cabin.âÂ
âThen go get them, duh,â you answer.
âWhat if Valentina is still outside?â he says, pointing to the door. âItâs only been a few minutes, I wouldnât be surprised if sheâs trying to eavesdrop on us right now.â
âHmmâŠâ you canât deny he has a point. âWell I guess,â you say, dropping your voice to a whisper, âyou wonât know until you try.â
âAlright,â Jungkook sighs, grabbing his phone from the bed.Â
You follow him to the door and youâre actually almost surprised when he opens it to reveal no one is there. Jungkook turns to look at you sporting a similar expression on his face and shrugs before stepping out.Â
âI guess that makes things easier for usââ
Youâre interrupted mid-sentence as Jungkook immediately turns back into the room with a slightly panicked expression, barging into you.Â
âJungkook!â Losing your balance, you feel yourself falling backwards with Jungkook stumbling forward. Your ass hits the floor first and you just manage to bring your arms behind you in time but your head still hits the carpeted floor behind you, and Jungkook who seems to fall in slow motion with you, eventually lands on top of you.Â
âOh Iâm sorry,â he mumbles, pushing himself up onto his forearms.
âThat really hurt,â you groan, squirming on the floor. Youâre grateful the floor is carpeted but both your head and ass still hurt.Â
Jungkook looks down at you with concern replacing any previous features. âWhere?âÂ
Rubbing the back of your head, you frown at him. âEverywhere. Whyâd you turn back?â
âSheâs right there!â Jungkook suddenly whispers instead. âShe was practically having sex against the wall with some guy.â
Still recovering from your fall, you look at him confused. âWhat?â
Jungkook grimaces. âShe was outside her room with some guy.â
âBut we just saw her!â you respond in a hushed whisper.Â
âI know! He mustâve been close by and they were making out like their lives depended onââÂ
âWell, this is interesting.â
Rolling your eyes at the sound of her voice, you let your head drop back onto the floor while Jungkook scrambles to move off of you. Moving beside you, he reveals Valentina standing at the door, her lipstick smudged and her hair a bit messier than it was a little while earlier.
She narrows her eyes, placing her hands on her hips. âForeplay on the floor is new to me, and leaving the door openâŠâ She looks directly at Jungkook. âI didnât know you were into voyeurism.â
Jungkook visibly freaks out, getting up and pulling you with him. âNo, gosh, it was an accident.â
Valentina frowns. âI donât judge, Jungkook,â she says matter-of-factly.
âI wouldnât care if you did,â he replies almost exasperatedly. âBut this was just an accident, we fell over.â
âHm, okay,â she says with a shrug as she glances at the bed.Â
You know she doesnât believe him but really thereâs nothing else you can say to make her think otherwise. Besides, you donât really care what she thinks while your head still hurts.Â
âWell, anyway, Iâve got to go.â She looks back at you with a smirk. âHow about we both do our best to keep it down tonight, hm?â she winks before turning and fluttering her fingers. âTa-ta angels, see you in the morning!â
As soon as sheâs disappeared from view, you go shut the door behind her, leaning against the wood.Â
âOkay, she is so doing it on purpose.â
âI know,â Jungkook agrees almost immediately. âI donât get why though.â
âI know why,â you say, raising your brows. âShe probably still isnât over you.â
Jungkook shakes his head. âIf anything, sheâs just not used to people moving on from her. Her exes were always all over her when we were together.â
âSo she expects you to go crawling back to her?â
âPretty much,â he shrugs. âSheâs really not helping herself though. Maybe I should talk to her, tell her to just give me spaceâŠâ He looks at you, raising his brow in question.
âYou could, but I reckon sheâll just act innocent and pretend she has no clue what youâre talking about.â
âTrue,â Jungkook sighs.
âLook, itâs fine,â you say, walking over to the drawer. âItâs just Val, nothing we havenât dealt with before.â Throwing a set of satin pyjamas on the bed, you turn around to face him again. âBesides, Iâm tired now, my head hurts and Iâd like to sleep.â
The frown on Jungkookâs face doesnât disappear. âIt still hurts?â he asks, coming over to you.Â
âYeah, you knocked me over pretty hard, my ass hurts too,â you pout.
Jungkook chuckles, hands coming to rest on your shoulders and he squeezes gently. âWant me to massage it?â he jokes.
âOoh, good idea. Letâs leave the door open too,â you laugh.
Jungkook smiles, still giving you a shoulder massage and you feel yourself letting go slowly.Â
âMm,â you hum softly, head relaxing. Jungkook steps closer and you let your forehead rest against his chest.
You donât realise as Jungkookâs hands stop working and gently make their way around your waist, holding you up as you get lost in the warmth of his embrace.
âShould we go to bed before you fall asleep here?â Jungkook says after a moment.Â
Pulling away from him, you smile with tired eyes. âDibs on the bathroom first.â
Jungkook obliges and sits down on your bed while you go first. When itâs his turn, he goes quickly since he has the most minimal night time routine, one of which youâve always been envious of.Â
Youâre just finishing brushing your hair when heâs coming out.
âWhat time is it?â he asks, stepping out as he dries his face.Â
âAlmost two,â you respond, getting up to walk over to your pyjamas on the bed.Â
Jungkook turns around without being told, facing the opposite direction. âDâyou think I could go get my clothes from upstairs now?â
You pull on your pyjama bottoms. âProbably not. I donât think I have anything that would fit you either.â
âWhat do I do then?â Jungkook asks, his confused tone making you laugh.
âDonât act like you donât sleep naked half the time, Jeon.â
âWell when Iâm alone, yeah. I donât wanna make you uncomfortable,â he says.
âIâm not, donât worry.â You clamber into bed, pulling the sheets up to your shoulders as you get comfortable. âJust get into bed.â
Still facing away from you, Jungkook shrugs before pulling off his top. You donât realise youâre staring at him strip until he starts pulling down his pants.
Abruptly, you pull the covers up even higher so you canât see him. You hear him shuffling and then he stops but you canât feel him getting into bed.
âReally?â he says. âMy abs offend you that much?â
You canât help but laugh, still keeping your eyes closed as you move the sheets down but place your hand in front of your eyes instead. âActually, they make for pretty good eye candy.â
Jungkook gasps scandalously, still shuffling about the room. âHave you been checking me out, Y/N?â
Cocking your head, you smile. âNow what kind of best friend would I be if I didnât appreciate you and your God given looks, hm?â
âA terrible one.â
âExactly.â
âSo why are you covering your eyes?â he asks, his voice growing louder as you feel the covers move beside you.Â
âBecause thereâs another friend of yours that I donât think I should be seeing as your best friend,â you say, ignoring the way you feel your cheeks go warm when you say it, and especially the way Jungkookâs deep chuckle sounds as you notice the bed dip beside you.
âHeâs covered,â he says quietly.
âNot enough.â
Jungkook laughs again and this time you can feel his body beside yours. âThat friend is hidden safe and sound, Y/N. You can look now.â
Peeking your eyes open slowly, you see Jungkook right beside you in bed. Heâs sitting up, smiling down at you with his abs eye level to you. Youâve seen Jungkook topless before plenty of times, but being this close and being in bed with him is new to you. Youâre sure itâs the reason you feel your heart rate rising.Â
âGood,â you say, turning away. âNow hide the eye candy please. Itâs bedtime, Iâve brushed my teeth and Iâm not trying to get a cavity.â
Jungkook laughs, sliding down further into the bed to cover himself up to his shoulders.Â
âTheyâre that sweet, huh?â
âIâd be disappointed if they werenât, all that time in the gym would just be a waste.â
âNow thatâs true,â Jungkook says with a smile, shifting in the bed so heâs more comfortable.
You hum quietly, staying still as Jungkook moves. Only once heâs found his comfortable position, then you do the same, turning onto your belly facing him.Â
Jungkook happens to be facing you too and he smiles sleepily as his eyes close. âGood night, Y/N.â
Your eyes remain open for a few seconds as you look at him a little longer. âMhm, night Koo,â you whisper, smiling even though he canât see you.Â
He looks pretty when he sleeps. You take in every one of his features, unaware that there is still a smile on your face as you do so.
Catching you unaware, Jungkook winks an eye open. âWhatâre you looking at, hm?â he asks softly with a teasing lilt to his voice.Â
You feel flustered, eyes going wide. âThereâs something on your face,â you say quickly, brushing nothing off of his face. âEyelash or something,â you mutter, subconsciously shifting away from him a little since the close proximity definitely isnât helping.Â
âUh-huh,â he nods, hiding a smile.Â
Youâre not sure what it is about his smile that makes your heart skip a beat and your senses go fuzzy like theyâve done so more than once now because of Jungkook. Itâs odd, heâs not doing anything different, yet you feel different. Mentally, you officially dub this The Jungkook Effect.Â
Thereâs not much you can say to defend yourself so you press your eyes shut and fight back a smile yourself. âWell, anyway, good night.â
âYou sure you wanna sleep?â Jungkook teases.Â
âOh shut up,â you say with a laugh, you pull one of the pillows out from behind your head and place it in the small space between your torsos.Â
Jungkook lifts his own head off his pillow and looks down at it with an amused smile. âIs this really necessary?â
Lifting your own head and resting on your palm, you arch your brow at him. âIâve read enough books to know what happens when two people who arenât dating share a bed.â
Jungkook mirrors your expression and dares to move an inch closer. âAnd whatâs that?â
Smiling like the little know it all you are, you answer, âThey wake up in the morning with someoneâs cute ass, which would be mine in this case, conveniently pushed up against someoneâs dick.â
Jungkook clicks his tongue and the smirk on his lips is clear as day. âAh, which would be mine,â he says, briefly looking down. His lips look wet when he says it and for some reason you find yourself wanting this conversation to continue on the same wavelength it is right now⊠but itâs also at this moment you realise youâre lying in bed and practically flirting with your best friend.
âExactly,â you say, letting out a small breath as you fall back into your pillow, looking up to the ceiling.
Pursing his lips, Jungkook hides a smile. âWell I guess we definitely donât want that to happen.â
You stifle a laugh as you lightly whack him with the pillow between you before putting it back in its place. âShut it, Jeon.âÂ
He chuckles, falling back into his pillow. âJust kidding,â he murmurs, sliding further beneath the covers and getting comfortable. âGood night, Y/N.â
With a tired smile, you hum. âGood night, Koo.â
The stops at St Tropez and Nice both pass as quickly as the first few cities in Spain and before you know it, youâve visited all the cities scheduled for France too. The stop in Barcelona has been your favourite so far though â the resort the Diamindisâ booked for the families on the cruise most definitely did not disappoint and the riding you got to do was just a big bonus, especially watching Alias struggling with his mare.Â
The whole Jungkook situation has been pretty easy to navigate too. Now that the important people in your life know itâs not real, it makes it easier and Jungkook and you only need to behave as you normally do so youâre both happy. On top of that, youâve noted that you havenât had any more experiences with the Jungkook effect, though youâre not sure you can say that pleases you.Â
Itâs also been a while since youâve hung out with Lawrence. He seemed to stay close in the first few days but you figured it must be his parents encouraging him to socialise with some of the other families since heâs not at home much. This became true enough when you saw him stuck at a table in some fancy restaurant in Nice with the Maddisonâs.Â
Although you did hope to get to spend some more time with Lawrence, at least for old times sake, you canât say you care much, especially since Sophia has finally joined you.Â
âWhy donât we go to the pool?â you say, raising your brows at Sophia. Itâs almost midnight but youâre still lounging on a quieter deck with Jungkook and Alias. Since itâs a sea day tomorrow, you donât need to be up early and it seems like itâll be more fun than the last time now that Sophia is here too.
She perks up at that, turning towards you. âItâs closed right?â
âYep, but that just makes it better,â you smile, ignoring Jungkook and Alias scoffing at your change in opinion â last time you were adamant that you should be following the rules.Â
âOkay, letâs do it.â She looks at Jungkook and Alias. âYou guys joining us?â
âSure,â Alias hops up. âItâll be fun to see Y/N break the rules,â he grins at you.
Sassing him, you get up too. âThis time Iâm pushing you in.â
âIâd like to see you try.â Alias tenses, flexing his biceps. âIâm 73 kilos of this,â he nods.
Itâs no secret that Alias has an impressive figure, but unwilling to cave, you just roll your eyes and playfully swat his arm. âWhatever.â
âAlright, letâs meet at the top deck pool in ten minutes?â Jungkook says hopping up from the lounge.Â
âMake that fifteen,â Sophia says. âI donât know where I put all my swimsuits.â
Agreeing, you all head towards the upper decks, only splitting up to go towards your respective corridors to your cabins. Sophia and Alias go right towards the corridor where their family cabins are situated, while Jungkook and you still need to walk a little further to get back to your shared cabin.
Surprisingly, itâs been easy to share a cabin with Jungkook. Most days you come back from whatever activity you had that day and knock out easily since youâre so tired. On top of that, your pillow idea seems to be working perfectly and you havenât experienced any awkward or uncomfortable moments. There have, however, been a few times youâve mistaken the pillow for Jungkook and in the split second it takes you to realise itâs only the pillow, you can swear your heart skips a beat and your pulse races. The disappointment that follows is something you canât seem to explain to yourself.Â
âSo Sophia comes and all of a sudden youâre Little Miss Daredevil, huh?â Jungkook says, as you walk together.Â
You glance at him and note how handsome he looks today. After spending some time in the sea while in Nice, his dark locks are curled and framing his face perfectly. He walks with his hands in his short pockets and the linen material of his shirt blows in the evening air giving the occasional glimpse of his lean figure. It occurs to you that this is going to be coming off in a short while when you go to the poolâ
Oop. You pause your thoughts, realising that the little flutter you just felt down south was definitely due to picturing your best friend topless. A part of you feels guilty wondering if Jungkook would be embarrassed, but you also know that Jungkook knows what you think of his physique. You pretty much said it all the other night and heâs caught you looking plenty of times before that, even making jokes about it when you did.
âShe brings out that side of me,â you sigh, smiling as you descend the steps that lead towards your corridor.
âAlias and I arenât good enough for you, huh?â
âDonât take it personally,â you joke, and Jungkook just laughs quietly so he doesnât wake up anyone as you walk past some cabins.Â
Once back at your own, you quickly change into a bathing suit and throw on a hoodie and shorts so in case any staff see you, they donât suspect youâre planning on going to the pool.
Alias is already waiting at the top deck and you can also see heâs brought some drinks along with him. Heâs chosen not to cover up and is revealing his washboard abs for the whole world to see, and letâs not forget those killer thighs of his.Â
âBeat you here,â he says without even thinking.
âWho was counting?â Jungkook says, bumping shoulders with him on purpose.Â
âI was,â Alias responds, and quickly the two resort to their childish antics as Jungkook pulls him into a headlock. You choose to sit and watch, dipping your toes in the pool as you throw your hoodie to the side.Â
âGuys, shut up, we can hear you from a mile away,â you hear Sophiaâs voice from behind you as she climbs the steps to your deck.Â
Jungkook and Alias stop mid-wrestle and you get up to pull your shorts off.Â
âHuh?â Alias frowns, pulling himself free from Jungkook. âWe?â
Once Sophia is standing on the deck, you see someone else coming up behind her.Â
Lawrence.Â
Sophia steps to the side as he steps up. âYeah, we,â she repeats.Â
âHey guys,â Lawrence says with a harmless smile, glancing across at you all.
âHey,â you smile back.
âOh, hey man,â Alias waves.Â
Jungkook smiles too with a nod of his head.Â
âI saw Lawrence on the way so I thought Iâd ask him to join us,â Sophia explains as she too pulls off an oversized hoodie.Â
âI hope thatâs alright,â Lawrence chuckles awkwardly.
âThe more the merrier,â Alias says with a shrug. âSo,â he looks at you, âwho are we pushing in first?â
âYou,â you smile.Â
Alias spreads his arms, inviting you. âIâd love to see you try, babe.â
Glancing to his right, you subtly raise your brow at Jungkook who smiles back at you. In a split second, Alias is being lifted from the ground and tossed into the pool.Â
Sophia and you jump into the pool right after, surfacing close to Alias.
âI thought we were friends,â he laughs at Jungkook splashing water towards him. âGosh, I forgot how whipped you are.âÂ
Jungkook just laughs and shrugs. âSorry, man,â is all he says.
âYou getting in?â Sophia asks Lawrence as she joins you next to the pool, dipping your toes first.Â
He nods. âI guess.â He glances around looking at the empty surroundings. This top deck is pretty big considering itâs wholly private.
âWhat?â Alias holds out his arms. âWeâre not good enough for you?â he jokes.Â
âOf course you are,â Lawrence says before he shrugs, lips curving into a smile. âI just think with all this space, we could do something more.â
âOh.â Sophia raises her brows, intrigued. âLike what?â
She speaks for all of you as you all look at him.
âI risk sounding like a five year old,â he says with a small laugh, âbut how about hide and seek.â He looks around again. âWeâre on a ship, weâve got plenty of hiding spaces.â
The rest of you glance at each other and itâs clear that youâre all in agreement.
Alias jumps out of the pool. âAlright, but itâs hide and seek chase.â He grabs a towel and dries himself off. âIâm it first,â he adds with a devilish smile.
âEven better,â Lawrence says, pleased that everyone is on board. âAre we splitting up or staying together?â
âIâll go with Y/N,â Jungkook says, approaching your side as you get up from the side of the pool. The air is chilly to your wet skin but you quickly warm up as Jungkook helps you pat dry.
âIâll stay with Lawrence,â Sophia says, walking over to his side.
âAlright letâs stick to the top two decks when hiding, but if Iâm chasing you, we can go anywhere,â Alias says, pulling on a linen tee.
âWhereâs the base?â you ask, covering yourself up too.Â
âHere?â Sophia proposes.
âOr only inside the pool,â Jungkook adds to the suggestion with a shrug.
Lawrence nods in agreement, as do the rest of you.
âAlright,â Alias smirks. âReady?â He doesnât wait for an answer before starting to count down, âone hundred, ninety nine, ninety eightâŠâ
The rest of you bolt immediately knowing that 100 seconds with Alias will only be 50, if that.
Sophia doesnât even wait for Lawrenceâs confirmation before running in the direction she came from but he follows her anyway.
With a tight hold on your hand, Jungkook pulls you in the opposite direction, already running faster than you can keep up with.Â
âSlow down,â you laugh, squeezing his hand.
âCâmon,â he says without turning back and without slowing down. âWe gotta get away first, heâs only gonna count to ten.â
Just as you suspected, even with the distance thatâs been put between you already, you can hear Alias yell out for you all to hear.
âReady or not, here I come.â
Youâre just grateful thereâs no cabins near here.Â
It feels like youâre running for a mile, starting outside before Jungkook takes you through a door and down multiple corridors and even two smaller staircases you had no idea existed. Heâs slower now which comes and a relief to you, but youâre still panting from all the sprinting.
âKoo, where the hell are we going?â you ask, tugging on his hand to make him stop.minutes, you find yourself on a part of the ship youâve never been to before.
âYouâre lost, arenât you?â you say, not really caring about being lost because youâre just glad Jungkook stopped running.
âNo, Iâve been here before.â Judging by the way heâs walking, it does seem like he knows where heâs going. âWeâre near our cabin.âÂ
âReally?â You look around, frowning at your surroundings. âI donât recognise it.â
âYep,â Jungkook takes your hand as he taps his pass on a door to go down a corridor which you still donât recognise but from the smell, seems to be near the kitchen.Â
âWait, JungkookâŠâ you pause, looking back at a small sign above where Jungkook tapped his card. Staff only. âHow?â you ask in bewilderment.
Jungkook just pulls you forward with a smug look on his face âAlias gave it to me. He got one for himself and Alex too.â
Of course he did. âHeâs trying to get us kicked off, I swear.â
âItâs just for a little fun,â Jungkook grins. âBesides, this way, we can win the game.â
âYeah, except Alias can get in here too then.â
Coming to a split in the corridor, Jungkook stops. âOh yeah,â he mumbles. âWell,Â
âHey!â
Jungkook and you both turn on the spot to the sound of a voice from ahead of you. Itâs a member of staff, the same one from the night Alias and Jungkook jumped in the pool. He seemed pretty mad at the time and seeing his expression now as he starts walking towards you, he seems the same. You donât blame him, he was chasing you guys for the better part of ten minutes.
âRun?â Jungkook whispers, his fingers clasping yours tightly.
âRun,â you nod.
Before you know it, your legs are moving as Jungkook leads you down the closest corridor.
âHey! Stop!âÂ
You almost feel bad about running away, but at the same time, you know that the guy is only trying to stop you to feed whatever power trip heâs on, so you keep running as fast as you can to try to keep up with Jungkook.
âDo you know where youâre going?â you huff, looking over your shoulder.
The guy is right behind you.Â
âNo,â Jungkook laughs, slowing down as he sees a corridor to his right.Â
âKeep going,â you laugh too, pulling him down the corridor before the guy can catch up.Â
âOi, I said stop!â he yells.
âWhat dâyou think, Y/N?â Jungkook asks, though he shows no sign of stopping. âShould we listen to him?â
âNever,â you respond, glancing back again. He seems to be slowing down but you donât stop yet. This time, you take the lead and go down a smaller corridor which you realise leads to a staircase.
âUp,â Jungkook ushers you, letting you go first. Luckily it;s a short one and Jungkook comes up close behind you.
âLeft or right?â you ask, glancing down the corridor. The left leads to a door which heads outside, the right leads to a door which seems to hide a dimly lit corridor.
Jungkook takes your hand again, going left. As he pushes the door open, you hear the guy is still coming close behind you. âStop,â he yells.
Youâre honestly surprised heâs still chasing you but youâre also tired now and really just want to stop. âKoo, I think I have asthma,â you breathe out, feeling your steps slow down.
Jungkoook chuckles, looking back at you. âY/N, weâve been through this before, you donât have asthma.â
You would pout because you know heâs righ and you still want to stop but you also donât want that guy to catch up to you.Â
Still, Jungkook glances around while jogging as though heâs looking for something. âAh, there!â
Youâre too tired to ask what, only letting Jungkook lead you across the deck to a door which takes you back inside. As you enter, you see the staff still coming behind you. Gosh, heâs bothered. After only a few yards, Jungkook uses the staff pass to open a door on your right. Inside is a small room with a few shelves lining the walls and one big one in the middle; itâs full of rescue equipment.
âWhat the hell, Koo?â you laugh, letting him take you inside as he closes the door quickly.Â
He takes you to hide behind the biggest shelf in the middle of the room. With your back pressed against it, he stands close in front of you so he can still see the door.
When you look up at him, you see a massive grin on his face and that mischievous gleam in his eyes that you love.
âYouâre crazy,â you murmur, restraining a laugh.
âShh,â he whispers, placing his hand beside your head as he takes the smallest step closer, one thatâs enough for you to feel the warmth of his breathing as his chest rises and falls so close to you.Â
The sensation makes you fall quiet anyway and youâre sure that even if you did speak, no one from outside would be able to hear you, but youâre rather enjoying the feeling of having him this close to you. The smell of his perfume â your favourite â fills you with every heavy inhale as you catch your breath too, and suddenly, you find this feeling familiar.
That damned Jungkook effect.Â
Since youâre stuck here hiding for a few moments, you can do nothing but just embrace it as it comes. Apparently youâre embracing it a little too much as you donât realise your eyes close and your head slowly moves closer to his chest. It just feels so good being this close to him â feeling his warmth, smelling him⊠his body is so close to yours, you wonder what would happen if you just took another step forward andâ
âYou okay there?â Jungkookâs voice comes out low with a humorous lilt.
ââHm?â Your eyes go wide as you realise your head was resting on his chest. âSorry,â you mumble, suddenly feeling your cheeks go warm. âIâm tired, itâs late.â
âMhm, thatâs okay.â
Looking up, you see the mischievous gleam in his eyes has changed to something playful.Â
âYou can use me as a pillow anytime,â he adds with a wink.
Scoffing, you poke him in the chest. âWell I gotta put these pecs to use somehow.â
He laughs quietly before poking his head out to the side. âCome on, I think heâs gone and weâve got a game to get back to.â
You follow him to the door and find the corridor empty, thankfully. âAlias has probably already found the other guys.â
âThat would make us the winners.â
âMm, Iâm pretty sure weâre supposed to get back to base first.â
âOh, yeah.â Jungkook pauses, looking around. âWhere is the base from here?â
âUmâŠâ Stopping beside him, you look around too. Itâs hard to tell when itâs dark but thereâs some parts of the deck which look familiar to you. âI think we keep going forward.â
âActually, I think weâve passed the way up.â
âWhat?â you frown, looking up confused.Â
âWell the pool was at one of the top decks and thereâs one way up which we missed, no?â
âI donât think so.â
Jungkook looks down at you, his brows raised. âReally?â
âReally,â you say, taking his hand to tug him along, except he doesnât move. When you look back at him, you see heâs got his brows raised with a smile, one that only spells a challenge.Â
âOh, câmon, Koo,â you sigh.Â
He shrugs before swinging your hand. âLetâs see who gets there first then,â he says in a sing-songy voice.
âFine,â you shrug, already turning away from him. âJust be careful Alias doesnât get you on your way.â
âIâll be fine, just look out for yourself,â he responds as he already starts skipping back the other way.Â
Shaking your head, you turn back to look at your surroundings. Youâre sure thereâs a small staircase somewhere near here that youâre supposed to go up which should be close to the pool. Itâs when youâre glancing around now that you realise itâs actually quite scary being alone on an empty deck late at night with no company but the sea.
Taking a few steps back, you look down the way you came to see if Jungkook might still be there but of course heâs not â heâs probably running to make sure he gets back before you.
Sighing, you continue down the path that seems familiar to you, only to hear a small bang from somewhere in front of you. Immediately, youâre relieved to see Lawrence coming around the corner ahead of you.
He smiles when he sees you. âHey,â he says, voice hushed.Â
âHey,â you answer, looking behind him. âWas that bang you?â
He looks back, confused for a split second before he nods. âOh, yeah, I just jumped down the last few steps when I was coming down.â
âRight. Whereâs Alias and Sophia?â
âWell Alias tried to get me just a little while ago but I lost him,â he says, looking proud of himself before he frowns. âWhereâs Jungkook?â
âWe split up,â you answer with a smug smile. âHe thinks the base is back this way.â You point in the direction that he went in. âBut I know itâs this way.â You point in the opposite direction.
Lawrence chuckles, looking at you somewhat endearingly though it goes unnoticed by you. âUh, Y/N, itâs the other way.â
âHuh?â you frown, looking back. âReally?âÂ
âYep,â he nods, hiding an amused smile. âI can show you the way if you like?â
Sighing in defeat, you agree to go with him. âItâs not like I have any chances of beating him now.â
âAh,â Lawrence sighs as he falls into stride beside you. âStill got the competitive streak I see?â
âMe?â you laugh quietly, glancing at him.
âMhm, you,â he says matter-of-factly, still sporting a smile.
Looking at him now, you note how relaxed and care-free he seems. Youâre not sure whether itâs because his usually swept back hair is now falling freely, or if itâs because of the glow on his face from the light sheen of sweat from the humidity of the evening air. Itâs nice to see him like this, even the smile is a difference â growing up he always seemed so mysterious and quiet which no doubt had to do with the pressure he faced as an only child and a big family name to live up to.Â
âWell, itâs good you remember. I wonât be losing today either,â you say with a playful nudge.
âOh, donât worry,â he laughs. âIf we bump into Alias, Iâm ditching you fast.â
âI hope so, youâre dead weight to me.â
âHey!â He nudges you back as he still laughs, loosely running his hand through his hair.
âMm, remember when we were kids?â you say, suddenly reminiscing. âWe used to do this stuff all the time.â
Lawrence nods. âI do,â he says with a smile. âThere was one Christmas, we all went up to that chalet in⊠oh, where was it?â he frowns, looking at you. âCourchevel?â
âHmâŠâ You shake your head as it rings a bell. âI donât think so, there was only one year we celebrated Christmas abroad all together and it wasnât in France.â
âSwitzerland?â
âYes!â You say, pointing your finger at him as you suddenly remember the finer details of the trip. âAt St Moritz, we had that massive suite at Kempinski.â
âThat's the one,â Lawrence says with a smile matching yours. âDâyou remember those nights we would always want to go out but our parents never let us? So we used to run around hiding from them.â
âMhm,â you nod. âI remember Leon and Helena would get so mad, even I was scared of them but their own kids never even cared.â
âMy parents got mad too but we still did it every night,â Lawrence laughs, his walk slowing down as the two of you approach the bow. âI wonder how he were so brave,â he continues, âI bet it was Aliasâs idea, all the fun stuff was always his idea.â
âMm, actually, I think it was yours,â you say, tilting your head towards him.Â
âReally?â Lawrence questions, brow raised as he walks closer to the ledge overlooking the tranquil evening sea though you canât actually see much besides a distant glittering coastline.Â
âMhm, really,â you nod, coming to stand beside him.
Lawrence turns so heâs facing you, a thoughtful expression on his face but his lips are still curved in a smile as they have been this whole time. âIâm surprised you remember.â
You shrug. âI remember a lot of things.â
Lawrence opens his mouth as though to say something before closing it.Â
âWhat?â you ask, turning to face him too.Â
He shakes his head. âI was about to ask something but itâs probably gonna sound stupid.â
âStupid questions are my favourite to answer,â you say with a smile.Â
He arches a brow, his smile changing to something more timid. âDâyou remember a lot about me or just everything in general?â
You laugh, not having expected that. Lawrence isnât really the conceited type so you donât think itâs coming from a place of vanity, and the shy hesitancy he says it with almost makes him seem cute â like he wants you to say him.
âBoth I guess,â you answer honestly.Â
He laughs too, one that reminds you of the days you spent daydreaming about him. It feels almost nostalgic, certainly not the same. If this was a few years ago you mightâve gotten butterflies from just hearing that laugh but now you only feel happy to see him letting his guard down and smiling which is a rare occurrence with him.
âAre you surprised?â you ask.
âWell, yeah,â he says, still with a shyness. âI thought I just went unnoticed in school.â
âUnnoticed? You were without a doubt one of the most popular guys in school.â
He shrugs. âNever felt like it.â
You scoff in amusement. âYeah, because imagine being the one to receive almost 100 cards on Valentineâs Day every year, not to mention the endless notes in your lockers.â
âAh,â Lawrence laughs softly. âOkay I see your point.â He glances towards you. âNever got one from you though.â
âI was too shy,â you say, trying to hide the truth a little with a tone of sarcasm.Â
âProbably wouldâve said yes if it was from you,â he says with a playful smirk.
âThanks for telling me this late,â you laugh. âBut waitâŠâ You look at him in amusement, having just processed some of what heâs said. âSo youâre telling me you had no idea that I had a crush on you in school?!â
Confusion is the first and only emotion you manage to catch on Lawrenceâs face, the rest passing in a second. âI had no idea!â he says, half laughing while still in what can only be surprise. âYou liked me?â He looks at you and you notice a tinge of pink colouring his cheeks.
âFor a long time,â you laugh. âThough I donât know why, you never paid me much attention until college.â
Lawrence doesnât skip a beat when answering. âI had to! Iâm two years older than you, any attention I wanted to give you throughout school mightâve just caused problems and I didnât want that for you.â
âWell, how thoughtful of you to not want me to be the subject of stupid rumours, meanwhile I was left to pine over you,â you say somewhat sarcastically but still humourful. âIf only I knew that you were being so considerateâŠâ only now do you realise exactly what it is that Lawrence has just said⊠âHang on.â You pause, brows creasing as you turn to look at him. âYou what?â
Lawrence suddenly hesitates, timidly. âI had a thing for you,â he mumbles after a few seconds.
âYou did?â
âMhm, for a while. Itâs always been there⊠still is.â
Your head is reeling⊠you couldâve had Lawrence. You still could have Lawrence â heâs telling you as much â butâŠ
âWhy didnât you ever say anything?â you ask softly, still dumbfounded.
âI wanted to,â he admits with a small smile, just about managing to look at you now. âYour first year of college, but you seemed so carefree and I didnât wanna be the older guy tying you down. Even though itâs just one year, everyone has fun in first year so I wanted you to have that too.â He purses his lips before releasing a small breath as he looks away.Â
âI wouldnât have cared about that,â you say quietly with a laugh.Â
To your relief, Lawrence laughs too, albeit awkwardly. âReally?â
âYeah,â you shrug.
âWell, for what itâs worth, I tried again in my last year, your third.â He glances at you before shrugging. âI donât think you cared for it though.â
Itâs easy to remember what heâs talking about now â thereâs no way you wouldnât remember all the times Lawrence tried to shoot his shot with you, especially because you could never figure out why you denied it to him and yourself.
Lawrence continues in your moment of silence. âI always thought it was because of Jungkook.â
All the thoughts come to a standstill in your mindâŠÂ
âNow I know I was right,â Lawrence says with a wistful smile.Â
Is this your answer? The reason you never wanted to pursue Lawrence even after having a crush on him for so long â because of Jungkook?Â
Itâs even crazier to you that right now, it doesnât seem so bizarre.Â
Jungkook has always felt right. Maybe you do care about him in more ways than you realised, maybe everything Lawrence is saying is true, and maybe everything Alex has been saying for months now is true. Thereâs obviously a reason youâve started to feel differently around him, not to mention youâre always finding any and every excuse to be with him.
Lawrence continues, unaware of the thoughts unravelling in your head. âI just wish Iâd had the courage to say something sooner, but itâs my fault.â He takes a step closer and the feeling of his hand brushing yours draws you back into this moment.Â
Looking up, you meet his gaze to see soft eyes and furrowed brows.Â
âNow itâs all out there though,â he says in a voice quiet enough to be a whisper, âI have to knowâŠâÂ
His eyes search yours and he hesitates for a brief moment before you feel his fingers lace between yours. âIt is too late, right?â
note. please interact with all parts and share your thoughts with me! <3 part 2 here
#jjk#jungkook x reader#jungkook bts#jungkook fanfic#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jeon jungkook#bts fanfic#jungkook best friends to lovers#bts fic#jungkook x you#jungkook fluff#jungkook oneshot
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desperately needing best friend! ellie who is just so much better at handling horror than you are.
it starts with ellie slyly handing you a ticket to an upcoming horror fest; fright frenzy. youâre not one for actual horror attractionsâ it almost takes too much to get you to sit through an entire movie. so, as you the eye the ticket with worry, ellie interjects.
âweâre going,â she declares, leaving no room for argument. âdina and jesse, too. next friday.â
ânext friday?! itâs only september!â
itâs how you end up in line for a haunted house, your eyes lost in a daze as you try to put on a calm front.
see, ellie is someone who can appreciate a good scare. sheâs grown to think that most jumpscares are pretty cheap, save for the creative ones that actually get her to say, âthat was sick.â
sheâs someone who doesnât even flinch at elaborate costumes, usually complimenting the actors and asking for a selfie with the zombie with amazing sfx makeup.
sheâs someone, and probably the only one, who sees through your little front. with dina and jesse too caught up in their own conversation (behaving like those abysmal couples in line), she nudges your shoulder, pulling you out of your internal hype session.
âhey. you can hold my hand, if you want.â itâs soft, but with a hint of a knowing smile.
and once you get inside; oh, you take her offer and run with it. you end up pressed into her side, her arm wrapped around you. your eyes tucked away in the crevice of her shoulder as she dips down to talk you through it (sheesh!). her voice is low, and it would probably drive you crazy if it werenât for the guttural screams and sound effects erupting at every corner.
since ellie is handling herself just fine, she whispers to you as she sees the jumpscares ahead of time.
âclown coming up. god, he looks so corny.â
âhey, hey; youâre doing so good, itâs almost over.â
and when the lights flash a little too much, her hands come up to cover your eyes, her sweet words filtering into your ear. ugh, you could almost die.
and itâs the way that she bites back a smile when she drives you home. the way you try to subtly tell her, i donât wanna sleep alone tonight. the way she nonchalantly offers for you to stay over at hers, promising to keep a comedy movie on until you fall asleep.
you end up sleeping in ellieâs bed, your whole body trying to wrap around and snuggle into her arm as she looks down at you, her heart skipping curiously.
#ellie williams x reader#ellie x reader#tlou x reader#ellie fluff#thought of this while working on my longer best friend ellie fic⊠UGH!#need her in a way that is detrimental to my health#honestly
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Had this idea about Rafeâs best friend! Reader who hasnât been with anyone in like a year and is getting really worked up. Maybe she had a terrible week and there was a last straw and sheâs yelling and yanking on her hair and throwing things and Rafe is kind of realizing she just needs to be totally dominated and taken care of so he does
rafe x bsf!reader
a/n: i totally love that idea anon !! first time writing ever i just didnt want to let sweet nonnie down, so apologies if its not that good !
cw: smut, swearing, drool.
rafe knew you havenât had a hookup in ages. you would vaguely mention it, when it would be just the two of you in either oneâs rooms. if he was being honest, he pitied you. he even wanted to be the one to help youâŠ
you were pissed off the whole week. maybe it was your hormones, with the way you would get annoyed at everything.
whether it be traffic making you late to events, or people at the country club being rude, steam was coming out of your ears.
you were like a ticking time bomb waiting to explode anytime now. good thing your bestfriend kept you grounded whenever you were feeling overstimulated.
so there you were, in your room getting ready for dinner with your family and the camerons. rafe on your bed scrolling on his phone, patiently waiting for you.
you were quiet while doing your makeup on your vanity table, not your usual chatty self. normally you would go on and on about anything and everything under the sun, yapping for hours on end.
rafe knew something was up.
âsomething wrong bunny?â he asked, using the nickname he gave you referring to the time you dressed up as a bunny for halloween when you two were little.
âno,â you replied with a pout, voice barely above a whisper.
rafe knew better than to push you, so he just sighed and kept quiet.
a few moments have passed, and rafe hears a soft âoh fuckâ, a thud, and heavy breathing from your vanity. he looks up from his phone and sees your head down, soft sobs coming from the table.
when he got up to come closer, you shot up. screaming, crying, wailing even. rafe could see your problem now: you smudged your mascara. you started yanking out your hair curlers, figuring they were useless if your makeup was ruined anyway.
âwoah woah- hey bun!â he yelled, pulling you by your waist. he placed you on your bed, rubbing up and down your arms to soothe you.
rafe guided you gently so you were laying your head on your pillows. he was in between your legs, arms caging your frame.
âshh calm down baby,â he whispered, wiping your mascara stained eyes with his thumbs.
he petted your hair, large hands slowly making their way to your cheeks.
âiâm here, iâm here.â he cooed as your cries hushed, turning into soft hiccups.
in this position he could feel you wet through your bloomers. he looked at your eyes as if to ask for permission silently, before he cupped your mound through the frilly fabric.
âwhat dâyou need bunny?â
âneed you rafey,â you whined. he carefully pulled down your bloomers, a string of slick connecting your pussy to the fabric.
rafe grew hard at the sight, taking his thumb to run across your slit. his other thumb trailing to play with your nipples through your top.
you mewl at the simultaneous sensations, given you havenât experienced them in a long while. he took that as a sign to circle your clit, causing your eyes to shut and your legs to close, only to be blocked by rafeâs broad figure.
he then plunged two fingers in and out of you, thick digits stretching your tight hole. rafeâs hand that was previously playing with your tits find their way to your mouth, muffling your lewd moans.
âletâs be quiet bunny. your parents might be downstairsâ he shushed, deep voice making your pussy clamp down on his fingers.
fingers curling up to hit your sweet spot, rafe could feel you getting close.
âyou can cum baby, go âhead,â he signals, feeling you gush all over his hand. eyes rolling to the back of your head, you felt euphoria rush through you.
as you rode out your high, rafe removes his hand from your mouth, drool dripping from your mouth and his hand.
âsorry,â you squeaked. he didnât mind anyway, just happy you probably had your first orgasm not from your own fingers in months.
it never occured to you that this was an option, to be touched by your own bestfriend. this wouldnât be the last time it happens, you could tell.
âthank you rafey.â you smiled weakly at him, looking through your lashes. he didnât say anything, just kissed your forehead.
âare we late to dinner?â you asked, suddenly remembering why you were getting ready.
âi drive fast, weâll make it,â he smirks, grabbing your small hand to cup the bulge through his pants.
dinner could wait.
likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated !! love, scarlet.
#scarlet writes ౚà§#new tag !#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x reader#rafe x you#rafe x y/n#drew starkey#best friend!rafe#best friend!reader#kook reader#rafe cameron prompt#drew x reader#rafe cameron p links#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron thoughts#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron outer banks#obx#rafe obx#rafe one shot
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first and last
pairing: childhood best friend!steve rogers x female reader
summary: after more than a decade away from your home townâand your childhood best friendâyou return. everything is exactly the same, but also, entirely different.
warnings: 18+ content (minors dni!!!), fluff, angst, smut, drunken antics, some arguing, drunk masturbation (f) with an audience, semi-public, choking, dirty talk, praise kink, begging, boundaries, very light bdsm vibes, references to past sexual intimacy (piv sex, oral sex [f receiving]), nicknames (buttercup, baby), aftercare
word count: 8.8k
a/n: this is my entry in @the-slumberparty's Sundae Bar Challenge, and i've been working on it since june so i'm very excited to post it!!! i wanted to make a sundae i'd actually eat so i used the prompts Butterscotch (childhood friends) and Caramel (drunk/delirious/not in their right mind). it also might be a bit literal to have Steve working at an ice cream shop but whatever!!
i mentioned when i teased this fic that i'd thought about turning it into a much longer story/potentially saving it for a novel, but honestly i just don't know when or if i'll ever have time to do that. but these scenes don't necessarily follow right after each other, so if they feel disconnected, that's why. they're just the ones i wanted to write đ
The sidewalk of Brambleberry Cove was warm from a full day under the August sun, the concrete gritty with sand beneath your bare feet as you walked the rest of the short distance to Seaside Scoops from your rental house a few blocks away.Â
The sun dipped low on the western horizon, casting long shadows over the coastal town like stretching fingers reaching for the Atlantic Ocean. You could hear the steady sound of the crashing waves over the near distant sand dunes, their rhythm a background to your walk.Â
It couldâve been a peaceful momentâyou were back in your home town, surrounded by familiar sights and sounds and smells. But you were in a wretched mood, and all you could focus on was everything wrong with the world and your current place in it.
There was, of course, the throbbing pain in your big toe from when youâd stubbed it moments ago on the cursed, charming sidewalk, as well as the slight sting on the sides of your foot where your flip flop straps had torn. Your ruined shoes dangled from your fingers because Brambleberry Cove didnât have a trash can on every street corner like the city you were accustomed to living in.Â
In addition to those grievances, the straps of your bathing suitâwhich you hadnât worn in far too long and hadnât realized had become too smallâwere digging into your shoulders and hips uncomfortably. And, though youâd only been walking for five minutes from the little bungalow you were renting, your thighs were already beginning to chafe beneath the simple dress youâd thrown on.Â
All told, you were not in the mood to appreciate the simple beauty of Brambleberry Cove. Instead of admiring the sun-bleached cottages that gave way to the small coastal shops lining main street, and letting yourself sink into the comfort of being back in your tiny beachside home town, you were fixated on everything wrong in your lifeâboth in that moment and the larger scheme of things.
In your defense, though, there was a lot wrong in your life. Thereâd had to be to get you back to your home town after so long away.Â
There was the dream job youâd lost, the ex whoâd left you for someone else, and the friends whoâd all promised to be there for you, but then vanished when you actually needed help. The only people whoâd come through for you were your parents, whoâd had a friend willing to rent a little Brambleberry Cove bungalow to you for a fraction of its normal summer price since it was already August and they werenât going to make much more money anyway.Â
Youâd had to pack up and leave the city where youâd built your life for 15 years, and move back to your home town, which you hadnât seen in nearly that long since your parents had moved out west shortly after youâd graduated high school. Being back home made you feel like you werenât only taking a single step backward, but moving leaps and bounds in the wrong direction. It made you feel like a failure.Â
But you tried not to think about all that on your short walk to Seaside Scoops, instead focusing on the pain in your toe and the digging ache of your bathing suit.Â
By the time you saw the familiar neon sign for the ice cream shop, it felt like finding an oasis in the desert. You picked up your pace, ignoring the way your body protested, the soles of your feet no longer used to walking on the sandy sidewalk like youâd done countless times growing up in Brambleberry Cove.Â
You could see through the window that there was a short line in Seaside Scoops, and you hurriedly pushed through the door of the shop. Once inside, you breathed in the familiar scent of sugar and hot fudge and reveled in the feel of the air conditioner ghosting over your sun-warmed shoulders.Â
Surreptitiously, you shoved your ruined flip flops into the garbage just inside the door and got in line behind the couple with their two small children. You glanced around the shop, not really taking it in, and hoped whoever was working behind the counter was still lax on the âno shirt, no shoes, no serviceâ rule that had theoretically been in place since before you were bornâbut had never been enforced in practice.Â
Finally looking to the counter, wondering idly if youâd recognize who was working or if itâd be some local teen that had been a baby the last time youâd been to Brambleberry Cove, you were shocked to see who was working at Seaside Scoops. Your belly swooped like you were standing on a boat on the choppy sea, your heart racing when you recognized the man behind the counter. At one time, heâd been the boy youâd shared so much of your childhood with, so many of your summers with.Â
When you got a good look at him, you were almost surprised you recognized him so fast. He was no longer the scrawny teenager youâd left behind when youâd gone off to college and never looked back. He looked so different from the boy youâd known well enough you could recall his face in perfect detail, but, in so many ways, exactly the same.
On the whole, it was a shock to see the man Steve Rogers had become.Â
Sandy brown hair fell on either side of his handsome, suntanned face, swept back like he had a habit of running his hands through it countless times a day. A short, well-kept beard decorated his strong jaw, bracketing a set of soft pink lips that were curved in a devastating grin. His bright blue eyes sparkled beneath the fluorescent lights of the shop, and when he spoke to the family in front of you in line, his voice rumbled like the distant roar of the ocean.
Seeing Steve Rogers for the first time in over 15 years made something loosen in your chest, anxiety uncoiling from around your heart and shaking free for the first time in a long time. A sense of safety and comfort washed over you, and you had the sudden thought that this was how you were supposed to feel about coming home.Â
But you shoved that thought aside and continued your perusal of your childhood best friend, making note of all the ways heâd changed from the boy youâd known.
Thick, golden biceps were bare and bulging beneath the edge of his white t-shirt, and dense, brown hair covered corded forearms as Steve folded his arms on top of the ice cream case. He was tallâtall enough to lean over the case to talk to the kids with the couple in front of you, asking them about their favorite ice cream flavors and if theyâd like to try anything new.
The kids, a boy and a girl, both stared up at him with wide eyes, shyness and wonder clear in their twin expressions. They looked to their parents for permission before shyly revealing what flavors theyâd like to try. Steve gave a deep, hearty chuckle at their timidness, and complimented them on their choices, which seemed to make them both loosen up a bit.
Inexplicable heat flushed through your body at the sound of Steveâs deep laughter, and the easiness with which he interacted with the kids. Youâd never been particularly good with children, mainly because youâd never had much of a chance to interact with any, and youâd never felt any particular desire to be around them. But seeing Steve looking like he did talking to those kids made your belly swoop again and something inside you pulse with a need you didnât want to fully unpack.
Shoving those thoughts into a box in the back corner of your mind, you forced yourself to look away from your childhood friend and up at the menu that listed all the ice cream flavors. Youâd been to Seaside Scoops hundreds of times in your life, if not thousands, and, at one time, youâd had the list memorized.Â
Hopefully you still had that knowledge tucked away somewhere in your brain, because you werenât taking in anything you were reading as you not-so-patiently waited for Steve to finish up with the customers in front of you.
It felt like forever, and by the time the family took their cups and cones of ice cream toward the side door that opened up into an outdoor seating area, youâd already cycled through three rounds of the same argument with yourself about why you should leave Seaside Scoops without talking to Steve. You couldnât imagine your first conversation in 15 years going well.
But you couldnât leave without talking to him. Not when he was right there and it had been so long and you were dying to know everything that heâd done in the last 15 years since you saw him last.Â
Still, it took you a few extra seconds to gather the courage to lower your eyes from the menu board and finally look at your childhood friend. When you did, your gaze caught immediately on Steveâs, and your heart gave a little flip at the devastatingly charming smile on his impossibly handsome face.
âHey there, buttercup,â Steve rumbled, his tone as friendly and familiar as it had always been. All of a sudden, it felt like no time had passed at all.Â
âHi, Steve,â you said, trying for the same casualness heâd achieved, but your voice sounded faint and faraway in your ears. The corners of your mouth flickered in a tremulous smile.
You couldnât understand the surge of emotion filling your chest and rising in your throat, pricking at the backs of your eyes like you wanted to throw yourself into your oldest friendâs arms and sob about everything wrong in your life.Â
The same deluge of emotion had hit you when youâd stubbed your toe on your walk to Seaside Scoops and youâd had to stand there by yourself, sucking in deep breaths of salty Brambleberry Cove air, nails biting into the flesh of your palms to keep yourself from breaking down.Â
Just as youâd done then, you beat back the emotion, blinking your eyes rapidly to rid them of tears. Still, a thought needled you as you stood across the counter from Steveâthe knowledge that if you did let yourself break down and cry, he wouldnât hesitate to fold you into that broad chest of his, wrapping you up in his thick arms and holding you so securely, the world might not seem so grim anymore.Â
You chalked it up to nostalgia and the rough time you were having, forcing yourself to take a deep breath and paste on a bright smile. Casting your eyes around Seaside Scoops, you pretended to give the place a real look, though you didnât really notice much as you continued to blink back tears.Â
âYou work here now?â you asked lightly, looking at the new standee in the corner.
It was a cartoon shark holding up a sign advertising Seaside Scoops and their many ice cream flavors. But what caught your eye was that it looked a bit like the shark Steve had drawn for you when youâd gotten a bad grade sophomore year and wanted to cheer you up. It even had the same little sailor hat sitting perched on top of his headâwhich only made sense because sharks didnât have blowholes, heâd told you at the time.
Youâd smiled then, and you smiled again remembering it.
âUhh,â Steve started, and you turned tear-free eyes back on your old friend, your gaze drawn to the way his bicep bulged against the sleeve of his t-shirt as he scuffed the back of his neck. There was a little bit of a sheepish tinge to his smile. âI actually own Scoops now,â he said in a rush, like he was confessing to something, though you couldnât imagine what. âI bought it when Mr. Wallace retired down to Florida.â
âOh,â was all you could think to say, glancing around the ice cream shop with a keener eye.
The shark standee wasnât the only new thing in the place. Everything, from the tables and chairs to the menu board and counter, looked slightly newer than you remembered. Nothing was wildly different, which was why you hadnât noticed it when you first looked around. Everything just looked better than it should if it had aged a decade since youâd last stepped into the shop.
Something about it made you think Seaside Scoops looked exactly like your memory of itâbut the polished, perfect version in your head, instead of the place as it had been. Yellowed with age and a lack of upkeep. It was genuinely astounding what Steve had done with the place and it took you a few moments to find the right words, though they still felt pale in comparison to the bittersweet nostalgia in your heart.
âThe place looks great,â you said with a half smile as you turned back to Steve. A small thread of pride wormed through your heart at seeing what your oldest friend had accomplished and your smile widened when he brightened under your praise. âI like the shark,â you said, hooking a thumb over your shoulder at the standee.Â
A bit of pink tinted Steveâs cheeks above his beard, and he cleared his throat.Â
âIs a dipped twist still your favorite?â he asked, clearly trying to change the subject and your smile dimmed just a little. The Steve youâd known had been shy about showing his art to anyone but you, and it seemed that youâd been gone long enough to be lumped in with everyone else.Â
You swallowed back a lump in your throat and nodded. âYeah, thatâs still my favorite,â you answered, more than a little surprised Steve remembered your order.
Sure, youâd gone to Seaside Scoops together countless times as kids. It had been your hangout spot for most of your childhood, and even into your teen years. Youâd study together over a cup of cookie dough with sprinkles for Steve and a cone of vanilla and chocolate softserve dipped in chocolate sauce for you. But that was more than a decade ago.
Your heart gave a heavy squeeze when you remembered the night before youâd left Brambleberry Cove, the way Steve reminded you of the promise youâd made as childrenâthat youâd always be friends. Your stomach twisted into knots as you were confronted with the reality that you hadnât kept up your end of the deal. Youâd left, and youâd allowed your oldest friend to become a stranger.Â
You wondered if Steve remembered the promise youâd made, the reminder heâd given you as a parting gift, or if heâd forgotten. You wondered if heâd ever want to be friends again.
Steveâs back was to you, his wrist flicking expertly beneath the softserve machine as he filled up a sugar cone with the twist of chocolate and vanilla. You forced yourself to push aside the memories of the past, blinking back more tears before Steve could catch them in your eyes.Â
You and Steve werenât friends anymore, and you needed to accept that. It was unreasonable to hold him to a promise heâd made more than two decades ago, especially when you were the one whoâd left and had barely tried to stay in touch between college classes and exploring your new city.
With a great amount of effort, you kept your mind blissfully blank as you let your gaze trail idly over Steveâs broad back, unable to stop yourself from noticing just how wide his shoulders were, or the way they moved beneath the soft, worn cotton of his t-shirt. He really did fill out the shirt well, his sides tapering down to a thin waist. And his ass looked particularly good in the curve-hugging denim of his jeans.Â
As Steve turned around, you raised your eyes quickly and arranged your expression into one of innocence. Steve paused, giving you a shrewd look like he wouldâve done when you were teenagers and you were hiding something from him, but then he just shook his head and laughed under his breath, turning to the chocolate sauce where heâd dip your ice cream cone.Â
âSo, what brings you back to Brambleberry Cove, buttercup?â Steve asked, his gaze focusing on dipping your ice cream just right, a look of determination on his face that was endlessly endearing.Â
You grimaced at the exact moment he glanced up at you, and he chuckled at the face you made. The sound was smooth as warm caramel and sent a new wave of heat rolling down your spine.Â
âThat bad, huh?â he asked, genuine interest in his tone.
Although there was a point in your life when you couldâve told Steve anything, and the urge to do so still lingered deep in your bones, you knew your relationship was different. You couldnât dump all your problems on your childhood friend after not talking to him for 15 years. You didnât even know if you were still friends anymore.Â
Plus, there was a small crowd gathering behind you as the late dinner rush started to filter into Seaside Scoops. Even if youâd wanted to tell Steve everything that had happened to you in the 15 years since youâd last seen him, it wasnât the time.Â
So you just gave him a sad smile and accepted the ice cream cone from Steveâs hand, ignoring the butterflies and ticklish warmth that fluttered through your body at his touch. You gripped the sugar cone tightâbut not too tightâso you didnât fumble it.Â
âYeah,â you whispered in answer to his question, leaving it at that. There was an awkward beat, and your eyes dropped to the ice cream that was already beginning to melt despite the air conditioning in the shop. Thankfully, you had an easy way to move past Steveâs questions.Â
You pulled some cash from the wristlet where youâd also stashed your phone and I.D., asking, âWhat do I owe you?â because you figured it mustâve been more expensive than what you remembered. And you didnât want to risk looking up at the menu and catching Steveâs eye, not wanting any of the emotions or heat that seemed to flood you whenever you looked at him.
But a large, warm, golden hand closed over your fumbling fingers, startling you enough to look up into the sky blue eyes of your childhood friend. Your lips fell open in surprise as tingling warmth worked its way up your arm from your hand, wrapping around your heart and making it beat harder.Â
For a long moment, you simply stared at each other. Steve really had grown up and changed so much, the evidence in the weathered grooves of his forehead and the lines between his brows, but his eyes still looked the sameâsoft as clouds, warm as the summer sun.Â
âItâs on the house,â he murmured, his voice low and earnest, the thrum of some emotion you couldnât identify laced through his words. âIt was nice to see an old friend,â he said, giving your hand a squeeze before he pulled his away.
It wasnât until Steve straightened up to his full height that you realized heâd been leaning over the counter, and your faces had been very close together. Heat crept into your cheeks at the realization that Steve had been in your personal space, and all youâd thought about was his eyes.Â
Shoving all the money in your hand into the tip jar, you muttered, âThanks, Steve.â As you zipped up your wristlet, you noticed that some of your ice cream was in danger of dripping onto your hand.
Without thinking, you licked quickly around the edge of the sugar cone, a soft moan slipping free when the cool sweetness of the ice cream hit your brain.
Steve made a strangled sound that dragged your attention away from your treat, finding your childhood best friend looking away and coughing into his fist, a deeper pink flushing his cheeks. You quirked your eyebrow in confusion when he looked back at you, but his expression gave nothing away and you had to wonder if youâd imagined the noise. It had almost soundedâŠaroused.
Shaking that thought clear from your mind, you gave Steve a smile and began to step away from the counter so he could help the next customer.
Steveâs eyes lingered on you, and he offered you one last charming, friendly smile, raising his hand in a wave. âDonât be a stranger, buttercup,â he rumbled, his low words managing to reach your ears over the chatter in the shop. He gave you a long look, emotion swirling in those familiar eyes of his, and your breath caught in your throat.
The intensity of his gaze and the warmth in his parting words hit you straight in the gut, and you stood stunned in front of the register while Steve turned and walked to the other end of the ice cream case to help the next people in line.Â
For a long moment, you couldnât get over the way Steve had been able to read your mind, to pluck the thought that you were strangers to each other out of your brain and then tell you he didnât want that to be the case. Your mind raced with questions. Did he still think of you as friends? Did he remember the promise youâd made all those years ago to always be friends? How did he know the exact right thing to say?Â
But then the rational side of your brain resurfaced from wherever your heart had momentarily buried it, and you remembered his farewell was a normal thing for people to say to each other. Especially people who hadnât seen each other in a while and likely would again because they both lived in a very small town. Thatâs all it was, just a normal goodbye.Â
Not Steve Rogers somehow reading your mind because he knew you so well.Â
With those rationalities ringing in your head, you dashed out of Seaside Scoops and it wasnât until your feet had carried you to the next block that you remembered your broken shoes and stubbed toe and chafed thighs.Â
But those problems didnât seem quite so bad anymore. Not with the delicious ice cream cone in your hand, and the sunset casting Brambleberry Cove in gorgeous, golden lightâand especially not with Steveâs warm, honeyed voice ringing in your head, calling you buttercup.Â
It had felt so normal to hear the nickname roll off Steveâs tongue that you hadnât even thought about it, hadnât realized how long it had been since youâd last heard it. But, just as it had when you were younger, it filled your chest with a bright, golden warmth. You grinned to yourself as you strolled back to your little bungalow, licking up the melting ice cream as fast as you could.
Your mood was decidedly better, and you enjoyed the walk home, refusing to think too much about why exactly you felt lighter and happier and less miserable about being home in Brambleberry Cove than you had before going to Seaside Scoops. It was just the ice cream, obviously. There was no other reason.
âYouâre staring.â Steveâs voice was low, the undercurrent of laughter in it almost mixing with the sounds of the distant waves. You could hear them through the open windows of his truck as he eased the vehicle down the winding road leading away from the docks on the north side of Brambleberry Cove.Â
His comment dragged you out of your drunken haze, and you took a deep breath to get your bearings. Your lungs filled with the salty nighttime air of the sea and the earthy leather interior of your childhood best friendâs truck, a small smile curling the corners of your lips and your eyes sliding closed. When you forced them back open, you realized he was right.
Huh, you really were staring at Steve.Â
Your head was swiveled to the side, your cheek pressed to the brown leather of the seat back, your eyes fixed on the profile of his face that was highlighted in the glossy silver of the moon and warmed by the golden light of the townâs street lamps.Â
You couldnât find it in yourself to feel embarrassed or ashamed for staring at Steve, though. And it was at that moment you realized you were drunk.Â
It didnât surprise you. After all, you were the one whoâd thrown on some jean shorts and a cute top and then took yourself to Shantyâs, the only place in Brambleberry Cove to go if you were a local looking to avoid tourists.Â
Youâd been happy to see Bucky Barnes, your other oldest friend after Steve, manning the bar. But youâd been much less happy with him when heâd insisted on calling Steve to take you home after youâd downed more than your fair share of liquor.Â
It was probably for the best, though. You were drunk and horny and if you werenât careful, you wouldâve gone home with Brock Rumlow. Just thinking about it made you grimace at yourself and your poor almost-decisions.Â
Focusing back on Steve, you couldnât fault Bucky too much for calling your old friend to pick you upânot when it had ended with you able to watch his side profile while he kept his eyes on the road. It felt practically shameful to indulge yourself so much. That is, if youâd had any shame left, but youâd drowned it all in alcohol.
âYouâre still staring, buttercup,â Steve rumbled, the humor clearer in his tone. The edges of his mouth were flickering beneath the silvery golden light of Brambleberry Cove at night and you knew he was trying to suppress a smile. It was fascinating to watch, but then Steve rubbed his hand across his mouth, scrubbing through his beard, and it broke you free of your drunken trance.
âI just canât get over how different you look,â you huffed, raising your arms and flopping them back against the seat in your best approximation of a shrug. âAnd how exactly the same.âÂ
Steve barked a laugh, the sharp sound bringing a smile instantly to your face. Youâd never heard him laugh like that, and you couldnât help but love that you were still discovering new things about him, even after knowing him all your life.Â
He glanced over at you, his expression bemused like he was sure you were drunker than heâd thought. You probably were, but that didnât stop you from being right, and you tried to convey that in the brief moment he looked at you.Â
Steveâs gaze slid quickly down your body, not like he was checking you outâmore like he was checking to make sure your seatbelt was still buckled and you werenât in danger of doing anything ridiculous. You were only in danger of saying ridiculous things, at least, according to him apparently. He shook his head after heâd turned back to watching the road.
âYouâre gonna have to explain that one to me, buttercup,â Steve said, a little bit of gruffness in his tone. He cleared his throat before he went on. âUsually when someone we went to high school with comes back, they tell me they never woulda recognized me.âÂ
You gave an unladylike snort, drawing another surprised laugh out of Steve before he bit off the sound to let you speak.
âWell those people should have their eyes checked,â you muttered scornfully, pushing yourself up from where youâd been slumped against the warm leather seat. You twisted your body in your seat so you were facing Steve, your eyes tracing the lines of his face from across the cab. âYou still have the same eyes,â you pointed out vehemently, as if Steve was arguing with you, even though he wasnât. âAnd your nose still has that little bump in it, and your lips are still so soft and fullâŠâ
You trailed off, realizing far too late that you were saying your inside thoughts out loud. Sinking your teeth into your bottom lip, you watched Steve as he processed what youâd saidâthe way his fingers scratched a little nervously at his beard, those twin lines forming between his brows. Your gazed traced every curve and line and divot in his face, examining his expression, wanting to memorize it and save it for the rest of your life.Â
âI donât think any of those people noticed those things,â Steve murmured, his voice so quiet you almost didnât hear it over the slight breeze drifting through the windows while he drove through town.Â
Your heart lurched at the implication of Steveâs words, but you couldnât bring yourself to take them back, even if they were dangerously close to revealing something you hadnât even had the courage to admit to yourself yet.Â
Instead, you focused on your anger at the hypothetical people who werenât recognizing Steve just because heâd grown up, gotten tall, gotten buff, grown out his hair and his beard and looked altogether very different to the skinny teenager heâd been.
âIf they didnât see those things, they didnât really see you,â you muttered to yourself, indignant on Steveâs behalf, but trying to keep it to yourself. Apparently, you werenât good at moderating the volume of your voice, because Steve snorted at your remark.Â
âNo, no one ever saw me as well as you did, buttercup,â Steve said, his voice low and warm, and your heart promptly rioted in your chest.Â
There was something so dizzyingly wonderful about hearing Steve say such intimate words to you in that deep, caramel voice of his, genuine affection shining through his tone. It took your breath away for a moment, and your brain short-circuited.Â
It was on the tip of your tongue to tell himâŠsomething. The thing you hadnât admitted to yourself yet. But you were still you, and your brain tripped at the last moment, and instead you blurted, âDo you ever think about our first time?â
Steve choked on a snort, his eyes darting to you with honest surprise. You couldnât blame him. Youâd had no idea those words were gonna spill from your mouth until they were out, but you supposed they werenât as bad as what youâd almost confessed, so you didnât try to take them back or change the topic of conversation. You waited with bated breath for Steveâs response, and whether he remembered your night together when you were both 18.
When he saw you were anticipating his answer, he spluttered, âYou mean when I came three seconds after getting inside you?âÂ
You began to smile, because he remembered, but then Steve continued talking.
âYâknow, I told Bucky about that once,â he said, his eyes fixed so fully on the road that you got the impression he didnât want to meet your gaze and your stomach plummeted. âI was drunk, and didnât know if it really counted as sex. Bucky was no help, of courseâhe said he didnât know either since it was so quick.âÂ
Something new was swirling in your gut, and for long moments you could only sit there on the warm leather of the truck and stew in that hot, feral feeling. It mustâve showed on your face because, when Steve finally looked over at you after youâd been quiet for so long, the truck lurched forward, his foot pressing too hard to the gas.
âDonât worry,â he rushed to say, guessing at what was upsetting you and guessing wrong. âI didnât tell him it was with you.â
âDonât you dare,â you snarled, the words bursting out of you with a ferocity youâd never used in your life, let alone when talking to Steve. But you were furious all of a sudden, and it wasnât until the words were spilling from your mouth that you understood why you were so angry. âDonât you dare try to take this away from me, Steven Grant Rogers.â Your voice was seething and barely recognizable, but you couldnât stop. âYou were my first, and it was perfectâbecause it was you.âÂ
Steve glanced over at you, something like shock written across his face, but when he looked back at the road, his brows settled low over his eyes. The muscle in his jaw popped and you knew he was grinding his teeth together, taking his time to gather his thoughts before he spoke. It took him a long moment to respond.
âYou deserved better.â
The noise of your scoff was loud, even to your ears, and you strained against the seatbelt still buckling you into the passenger seat as you leaned toward your childhood friend.
âYou ate me out until I came three times, Steve!â you cried, holding up three fingers as if the adult man your friend had grown into somehow didnât know how many three was. âNo man has ever made me come so many times in one night as you did then.âÂ
When Steve still didnât look at you, just kept driving with his hands gripping the wheel and the muscle in his jaw popping, you huffed an exasperated sound and flopped back into your seat. Your back was to the leather as you crossed your arms over your chest and stared out at Brambleberry Cove through the open passenger side window.Â
The silence grew until it was suffocating, and you needed to break it. So you said the first thing that came to mind. Again.
âYouâre who I think about when I touch myself, Steve.â Your words drifted from your side of the truck to the other, carried on the light breeze floating through the cab. âI think about you and that night, and it gets me off every single time.â
Steve made a strangled kind of sound, like a growl that was torn free from his throat against his will. Then he was quiet, and he was quiet for so long, you thought that was the only reaction youâd get to admitting the truth. UntilâŠ
âI think about you, too, buttercup.â
The confession hung in the air between you, settling heavily onto the leather bench seat in Steveâs truck, the air rushing in through the open windows buffetting around it.Â
You didnât feel Steveâs admission sink into you. There was simply a before and an after. And in the after, you were moving. You were unbuckling your seatbelt and scooting across the seat toward Steve until your bare knee brushed against the denim of his jeans.Â
He shot a startled look in your directionâwhich, in a distant part of your brain, you registered as completely adorableâbefore quickly pulling over to the side of the road. He was just throwing the truck into park when you slid into his lap, straddling his thighs and pressing your chest to his.Â
âWe should do it again,â you purred, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and leaning close. When Steve didnât respond right away, just kept giving you that surprised look, you thought he might not have understood you, so you explained, âHave sex.â
Steve closed his eyes and a light tremor shuddered through his body as his hands settled respectfully on your waist, a few of his fingers brushing the skin where the edge of your tank top didnât quite meet the waist of your shorts. Then, it was your turn to shudder, the feeling of his warm, calloused hands against your bare skin making heat flood between your thighs, your core warming and your body melting into your old friendâs hands.
âPlease, Steve,â you whispered, tipping your head forward until your lips were a hairsbreadth from his, so close you could taste mint chocolate chip ice cream on his tongue and it took everything in you not to lick into his mouth desperately. Your voice was practically a whine as you went on, âLetâs see if we can do better this time.âÂ
Steveâs hands shifted to your hips, his fingers digging into your soft flesh hard enough to almost hurt, and you thought he was going to give in. But then he swallowed audibly, his adamâs apple bobbing in his throat, and he pushed you gently away, his head tilting back against the leather seat so your lips no longer teased him with an almost-kiss.
âYouâre drunk, buttercup.â
Steveâs voice was a delicious rasp, and you couldnât help but shiver at the sound of it even as the meaning of his words settled into your drunken mind. You pouted at your childhood friend, hoping the fact that he hadnât pushed you off his lap entirely meant he wasnât saying no.
âAnd horny,â you said, the words slipping from your lips on another whine. Of their own volition, your hips squirmed on your oldest friendâs lap, trying to get closer, trying to find some kind of friction to work against the aching heat pulsing between your thighs. But Steveâs firm grip held you in place. âStevie.â His name was nothing but a pathetic whimper.Â
A low growl rumbled in Steveâs chest, and then one of his hands was abandoning your hip to cup your face, tilting it up so he could loom over you. The lines of his face were hard, stubborn, and the look in his eyes left no room for argument.Â
âYou know I wonât touch you when youâre drunk,â he bit out, his voice soft, but as firm as his hold on your body.
A memory slammed into youâyou and Steve planning your first time together. Youâd made a deal at the start of high school that if neither of you lost your virginity through all four years, then before going off to college, youâd lose it together.Â
When the time came, youâd been a little nervous, even though it was Steve, and youâd joked that you could take some wine coolers to the beach and get it over with, just like all the other kids in your school. Even then, Steve had looked at you stubbornly, and said, without a shred of willingness to waver, that he wouldnât touch you if you were drunk.
Back then, it had sent a shiver down your spine, and it had much the same effect more than a decade later in his truck. Your body trembled with arousal, and you pushed feebly against Steveâs holdânot really trying to break it, just enjoying the feeling that came from realizing how strong he was. Those biceps and corded forearms of his werenât just for show.
âWhat about just the tip?â you murmured, the words tumbling past your lips before you could think better of them, knowing there was no use trying to argue with Steve when heâd made a decision. But you were clearly thinking with something other than your brain, because the words kept coming. âThatâs not sex, just the tipâplease, Steve.â You were begging shamelessly, but your shame and embarrassment were still nowhere to be found since you were still definitely drunk.
Steveâs jaw ticked so hard, you couldâve sworn you heard the muscle pop in the quiet of his truck as he ground his teeth together.Â
âButtercup,â he growled, a warning in his tone. âThatâs not happening.â
Your fists gathered in the front of Steveâs t-shirt and you yanked on it restlessly, not trying to do anything more than annoy him. âWhyyy,â you whined, drawing out the word until it was nearly a wail. Unslaked heat burned in your blood and, while you knew why he was refusing to have sex with you, in the moment, you couldnât understand why your oldest friend was torturing you.
Steveâs hand slid down from your cheek to wrap around the front of your throat, and you stilled immediately, something about the possessive, dominant gesture making you calm. That was new, Steve hadnât done anything like that when youâd first been together, but you liked it more than you wouldâve expected. Your lips were still parted, your panting breaths gusting out of them, your heart racing, and you were finally calm and quiet.
Your oldest friendâs eyes roamed over you, taking in your reaction. At first he seemed surprised, but then a glint of something youâd never seen before sparked to life in the depths of his blue eyes. You watched his gaze drop to your mouth, and nearly whimpered at the way the corner of his lips flickered in the ghost of a smirk. But then he fixed his gaze back on yours, pinning you in place with that stubborn look in his eye, though it was slightly dimmed in favor of that new, hungry glimmer.Â
âI wonât fuck you only to wake up tomorrow and find out you regret it,â Steve said, enunciating all his words clearly despite the fact that his teeth were grinding together âThat you only wanted it because you needed to scratch an itch.âÂ
Your lungs dragged in a soundless gasp and you finally understood his reticence, even if you couldnât imagine ever regretting doing anything with Steve. But when you opened your mouth to protest, Steveâs fingers squeezed the sides of your throat.Â
Your words died on your tongue, and your mouth went slack, your eyes going hazy with pleasure. You couldnât have been more obvious that you liked the way Steve choked you if you tried. And he read your enjoyment easily from the expression on your face, that look of hunger sparking brighter in Steveâs eyes before he went on.
âWhen I fuck you again,â he growled, his words a promise. âI donât want you drunk on anything but my cock.â
âStevie,â you whined his nickname again, the name only you were allowed to call him, your lips forming into a pout. It hadnât escaped your notice that heâd said âwhenâ, and not âifâ, about having sex with you again, but you didnât want to push your luck. And besides, unslaked need was still burning brightly through your body, consuming most of your focus. âI needâŠsomething, please.â You let out a little whimper and squirmed in his lap again, unable to stop yourself.
Steve huffed a laugh, his thumb stroking down the side of your neck, over your thrumming pulsepoint, while the fingers of his other hand slipped half an inch into the waist of your shorts, only far enough to dig harder into your soft curves. Â
âIâm not going to touch you more than this, buttercup,â Steve began, his voice a low, delicious rumble that you swore you could feel in the clenching of your core. âBut I didnât say anything about stopping you from touching yourself.â
Your eyes widened in excitement, and you wasted no time in acting on the implication in Steveâs words. Holding his gaze, one of your hands slipped free from his shirt and trailed down your body. When you reached between your thighs, the backs of your fingers brushed against a thick bulge in the front of Steveâs jeans.Â
It twitched against your soft touch, and you gasped in delight, loving the proof that Steveâs body recognized you just as much as his mind.
But when you twisted your hand, intent on giving Steveâs bulge a friendly squeeze, his hand darted down from your hips to your wrist, his fingers circling around you and stilling your hand. âButtercup,â he rumbled, another warning.Â
A shiver raced down your spine and you reveled in the way it made you feel to hear Steve say your nickname like that. It occurred to you that it was newâyouâd never heard him say it quite like that before, with frustration and arousal flooding his tone.Â
You wanted to hear every flavor of your nickname on Steveâs tongue. You wanted to hear him whisper it like a prayer, and groan it into your lips while he kissed you. You wanted to hear Steve shout your nickname while he came with you.Â
But the look in Steveâs eyes was stubborn again, and you knew youâd have to wait to hear all the ways he could say your nickname.Â
âOK, Steve, âm sorry,â you mumbled, twisting your hand in his hold and pressing the tips of your fingers to the seam of your shorts, your hips jerking forward to seek more of the friction you offered yourself.Â
Steveâs hold loosened, but he didnât let go of you entirely, like he didnât trust you just yet. But you didnât care, your fingers were pressing into your clit through the thin denim of your shorts, and you were rocking your hips to grind against them, your wetness soaking through your panties almost immediately.
The moment when your fingers found just the right spot, you sucked in a sharp breath, your spine arching and your hips pressing down hard against your hand. Your head tipped back, your eyes narrowing into slits as you held Steveâs gaze. You moaned while you rubbed tight circles against your clit through your shorts.
âIâm going to come embarrassingly fast,â you huffed in warning, your chest heaving already with labored breaths.Â
But Steve only smirked, a touch of smugness in the curve of his lips.
âDonât worry, buttercup, I remember exactly how sensitive your sweet little clit is,â he rumbled, and you moaned loudly. His fingers flexed against your throat, digging in enough to quiet your sounds and making your eyes widen as your hips lurched in their rhythm. He chuckled at your reaction before continuing on.
âI remember sucking on your puffy little pearl, your thighs squeezing my head, my fingers buried deep in your tight, warm hole,â Steve purred, seemingly knowing exactly what to say to drive your pleasure higher. âI remember the exact way your pussy gripped my fingers when you came, like you wanted me deeperâdeep enough that you could feel me in your belly.âÂ
âGod, Steve,â you groaned, your head falling back listlessly on your shoulders, too heavy to keep it up. But Steveâs fingers dug into the back of your neck, and you understood the wordless command immediately. You lifted your head and caught your oldest friendâs eye while you kept rubbing your clit, pushing yourself closer to coming apart in his lap.Â
âI remember how big your cock felt inside me,â you confessed, spurred on by Steveâs own filthy words. âI remember how long it took for you to sink your thick, fat cock into my tight pussy.â You paused only to take a quick, hitching breath. âI was already so close when you came, and I remember, I thought, maybe if you hadnât been wearing a condom, maybe I wouldâve come, too.âÂ
The lines of Steveâs face shifted, hardening, his jaw ticking wildly and his eyes going molten fierce, like the blue at the center a campfire that burns too hot to sit near.Â
âDonât fucking say that, buttercup,â Steve growled, his voice gravelly like he was chewing on seashells. âIf I hadnât been wearing a condom, I wouldâve come so much fasterâI never woulda made it all the way inside you. Woulda been coming with just my tip inside your warm, wet pussy, babyâwoulda been too risky, buttercup.âÂ
Your eyes wanted to fall closed as you moaned, but you didnât let them. You couldnât tear your gaze away from Steve, not with that furious and ferocious hunger in his eyes, his desire for you etched into every single line and curve of his face.Â
You were so close. You just needed a little more to push you over the edge.
âFuck, Steve, I know I shouldnât, but I love the thought of you coming inside me, filling me up, making me yours,â you confessed, the words bubbling up from the very depths of your soul. It was on the tip of your tongue again, that thing you hadnât admitted to yourself. Instead of letting it free, you moaned, long and loud, your fingers rubbing faster against your clit and your hips grinding against your hand.Â
âChrist, baby,â Steve gritted through tightly clenched teeth. His fingers were digging into your hip again, diving further beneath the waist of your shorts, nearly skimming the edge of your panties. His other hand tightened around your throat and dragged you into him, until your face was right in front of his and he could watch every twitch and change in your expression as you pleasured yourself.Â
âCome on, baby,â he said, his voice urgent with need. âCome before I do something weâll both regret.âÂ
The hand that wasnât wedged between your thighs pressed to the center of Steveâs chest, just above his heart, and a moment later, you felt his warm palm cover it. He was still holding your throat, his fingers digging into the sides hard enough that you knew he could feel your fluttering pulse beneath his touch. And you could feel his heart pounding beneath your palm, the rapid pace nearly matching the frantic one in your chest.
âCome, buttercup, come for me,â Steve commanded, his eyes holding yours. For a moment, it felt like he could see straight into your soul. It was a scorching intimacy you hadnât felt since that night youâd first been with Steve, and you were helpless to it.
âStevie,â you cried his name as your pleasure rose up and consumed you, sending you over the edge into a earth-quaking orgasm. Your body writhed in Steveâs lap, your hips grinding gracelessly against your hand as you collapsed forward, leaning into the grip of his hand around your throat. You sobbed your pleasure, the waves of your release wracking your body for long moments.
Eventually, the final swell ebbed and the last of your energy receded with it. Your damp forehead fell against Steveâs cool, dry one and you struggled to catch your breath. His hand slipped from the front of your throat around to the back of your neck and he smoothed it down your spine.Â
He held you close, whispering in your ear, âSuch a good girl, buttercup, you did so good.â
Once you finally settled, Steve shifted, his beard grazing your lips as he pressed a kiss to your cheek.Â
âCan I take you home now?â he asked.
You huffed a laugh and slumped against his chest, laying your head sleepily on his shoulder. âI donât think I can move yet,â you said, slurring your words with tiredness. And drunkenness.
Steve chuckled, but made no attempt to move you. You only felt him lifting his arms around you, though his hands didnât settle on your body.Â
âIf you see Sam while youâre back in town, donât tell him I did this,â Steve murmured in your ear. Then you felt the truck rumbling to life and getting back onto the road and you realized where your oldest friendâs hands were. He was driving you home, with you still sitting boneless in his lap.
When Steve arrived at your rental house, not too long after, he helped you down from his truck and looped an arm around your waist, getting you into the bungalow. Thankfully, you were sated from your release in his truck so you didnât try to proposition him again, just dutifully did as he said, changing into your pajamas in your bedroom while he waited outside the closed door.Â
Then he let you lean against his broad chest while you brushed your teeth and washed your face, before guiding you back to your room and tucking you into bed. Last, he pressed a sweet kiss to your forehead that was so comforting, and made you feel so safe, your eyes fluttered closed and a soft smile curled your lips.
Before he could leave, your hand darted out and grabbed Steveâs wrist with surprising precision given your state and the fact that your eyes were closed. You dragged them open again, blinking away the bleariness until your childhood friendâs face came into focus.Â
âI donât regret anything weâve done together, Stevie,â you mumbled, the side of your mouth hitching up in a lopsided smile. âIâm glad you were my first.â You lost the battle with your eyes and they fell closed. You also, apparently, lost the fight against biting back your feelings, murmuring sleepily, âI want you to be my last.â Â
For a long moment, Steve was quiet. He seemed to wait until you were just on the edge of sleep before responding to your drunken confession.Â
âTell me that again when youâre not drunk, and Iâll believe you, buttercup,â Steve murmured, ducking down to press a kiss to your hand, still wrapped loosely around his wrist, before carefully extricating himself.Â
You were snoring before Steve closed and locked the front door of your bungalow behind him. He walked down the short path to his truck, which sat at the curb, a subtle smile on his lips and a glimmer of hope in his eyes.
#steve rogers#steve rogers fanfiction#steve rogers smut#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x you#steve rogers fanfic#steve rogers fic#friends to lovers#steve rogers au#childhood best friend steve rogers#childhood best friend#chris evans#chris evans fanfiction#chris evans smut#chris evans characters#witchywithwhiskeywork
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Redamancy ['red-a-man-sE] noun ;a love returned in full
Part II out now!
{ Pairing } - idol!bangchan x staff!afab.reader (with a hint of bestfriend!jisung?)
{ Genre } - NSFW, the trifecta (s/a/f), frenimies to friends to lovers? idk but we'll get there in the end
{ Synopsis } - Han Jisung is your new bestie & technical colleague, of course you befriended the rest of his members. Group nights became a tradition, & tonight involves liquor and drinking games for the first time. Truth or drink?
{ WC } - 6.7k
{ Warnings & tags } - 18+ MDNI, NSFW, smut, angst, fluff, drinking, breath play (choking), swearing, dry humping, use of 'babygirl', mention of wet dream, talk of edging, talk of domming, talk of choking, talk of exhibitionism, all of ot8 is suggestive af when they drink, reader and jisung are PLATONIC I promise they're just touchy, they're all giggly drunks so overuse of laughing chuckling and giggling, chan is kinda dumb in this he just... is in denial land but we'll find out more about that later, unrealistic work scenarios, unrealistic dorm setup? idk lol
{ Disclaimer } - This work is in no way associated with the actual skz, and is a fictional piece. I DO NOT own Stray Kids, this fic is just influenced by them!
{ A/N } - Okay I know I took forever to post & this intro is hella long & I'm sorry! Once again, I will say this is my first skz fic. I come from the world of AO3 & dramione. I am out of my comfort zone lol. First time posting stories on tumblr too! So if I missed anything please let me know <3 there will be a part 2, I've already started writing it! The plot is weak af, but gimme a few more stories and I'll find my groove. Promise! Unbeta'd, be gentle with me âĄ
It was supposed to be a relatively chill Saturday night, so you were excited. You just got off work, and had arrived at Jisung's. He swung the door open smiling and pulled you inside, into an immediate hug. Everyone said their greetings, and then Jisung went immediately to whining.
"Finally, what kept you so late?"
You took your shoes, mask, sunglasses, and hat off, letting your curls fall down your back. Then you unzipped your sweatshirt, shrugging it off your shoulders and exposing your fitted white tee. You gave your jacket and bag to Ji so he could put them away. You always arrived in 'disguise', in baggy clothing so that no one suspected anything. Though you thought it was ridiculous. It doesn't matter how baggy the sweat pants or hoodie is, there's no hiding the curve of your ass.
You were a content editor at JYPE, and had become really good friends with Han Jisung. Friendships between idols and staff certainly aren't forbidden, in fact they're encouraged to an extent... as long as no lines are crossed. But it's pretty much an ignored rule. Anyways, you were a small 'behind-the-scenes' employee, not a manager or assistant or makeup artist. Not anyone directly involved with any idols. No one off the street knew who you were. Still, over the last almost year or so, you and him became besties. You frequently shared meals together at work, had sleepovers, you even went camping. You were basically glued to each other. It could easily be taken the wrong way by the media and fans. Hell, it gets taken the wrong way by co-workers, other idols, and even his group members. Although they've mostly accepted that's not the case. It's a given with the way you two act though.
Your relationship is definitely platonic, confirming pretty early on that neither of you felt anything more than friendly love for each other. But you both love teasing the other suggestively. You suppose that's partly why you two got so close so quickly. Your personalities are so similar, it's like you share the same singular brain cell sometimes.
"Editing, per usual." You finally reply with a sigh, "We had to cut A LOT out of nexz's new video. They're so high energy, they slip up a lot, especially with the swearing, but nothing we can't handle."
"Gotta love kids." Chan snorts while sipping a beer.
You smile awkwardly in response and look around the room. Everyone is here, all with their preferred beverages, and chatting away or scrolling.
Ji comes back with a drink for you, he knows you're partial to tequila and always keeps it on deck. Normally, you spend every weekend you can together, which sometimes is not as often as either of you would like. Sometimes you'd both head back to your place, and just have all nighters, binge watching anime and gorging yourselves on junk food. More recently, like tonight, you get invited over to hang with him and the rest of the boys.
It usually results in a few drinks and a movie, or talk about work. Sometimes you just play music and talk and vibe, or try to cook food together when you get the munchies... Which more than likely results in Minho taking over because he just can't help himself. However the nights play out, they're always fun, and you're gradually getting closer to the rest of the members too. Although no one can compare to the bond you have with your Jiji.
"I don't wanna watch a movie tonight, my eyes hurt too much." He starts complaining.
"Poor baby." You tease and run your fingers through his hair, laughing.
"When are you two just going to come out with the fact that you're in love?" Seungmin asks.
You roll your eyes, "When dwaekki's fly."
"I can easily make that happen." Changbin laughs.
"We could play a game?" Felix suggests, already looking flushed from the alcohol.
Jeongin gets excited, "Let's do a drinking game! It's been a while."
"I don't believe I've ever played a drinking game with y'all."
Hyunjin hums, "Mm, you haven't. Mostly because we get crazy, we've never brought up the idea."
This piqued your interest, "More crazy than I've already seen? I don't think that's possible."
Minho chimes in this time, "You forget we're a group of men sometimes, I swear. Mix alcohol and suggestive games, it definitely gets 'crazier' than you've seen, inappropriately crazy."
You level him with a smirk, "I'm down."
"That's my y/n!" Ji says, while pulling you to sit in his lap, "Fearless."
You giggle and lean into him while Minho just narrows his eyes at you and purses his lips. Something tells you he's up to something, but you're ready for any challenge.
"Fine. Then we'll play something easy, truth or drink. If someone refuses to answer, they drink. Whoever finishes their drink first loses." Minho says.
"What does the loser have to do?" You ask.
"Pay for everyone's lunch every day for a month!" Changbin says.
"Deal." You say.Â
You're an open book, Ji knows this. There's no question you won't answer.
Everyone is up now, getting new drinks & refills before the game starts. You can't help but notice that Chan didn't get up, he looks a little nervous for some reason. He was always the most worried about you being around so much. In the beginning it definitely came across like he didn't like you. Now you know that's not the case... you think. He tolerates you now to say the least. You couldn't blame him too much, he was just protective of his boys. You actually found it incredibly sweet, or maybe it's just that stupid soft spot you have for him.
He always tried to keep you at arms length from the group. Not wanting anyone to get too close to you. Until Jisung put him in his place, as best he could anyways.
You were in Ji's lap, watching Spirited Away. He was drawing imaginary lines and shapes on your back, while you rested your head on his shoulder, facing the tv. His head was resting on top of yours as well, and a blanket covered you both.
Chan walked in seeing this, and nearly had a stroke. He said we were being inappropriate. And specifically made it a point to tell you to be more professional as a member of the staff. Short version: know your fucking place, you're overstepping.Â
You scoffed at him, prepared to confront him about his growing disdain towards you. Let him know he's the one being inappropriate, downright childish. But Ji nudged you onto the couch and got to him first.
It was kind of cute watching him standing there, ears becoming red and getting in Chan's face. Cute in the way that it was like a maltese puppy trying to stand up to a doberman. Then he proceeded to yell at him about how he was way out of line. Saying he was being flat out disrespectful and that he was done with the ridiculous way he has been acting about you. The last thing he said was that he didn't know what got into him, and that he'd never seen this side of Chan before.Â
Chan was silent, looking intensely into Jisungs eyes. But he never backed down, so Chan poked his tongue to his cheek, then retreated to his room for the whole night. You had to scoop Ji off the floor right afterwards. He had let his knees buckle, and fell to the floor once Chan was gone. Citing that he wasn't sure he was going to live through the night to see the morning sun. Typical dramatic fashion for your best friend. But you soothed him, fluffing up his ego about 'defending your honor'. His words, not yours.
As that night went on though, the tiniest bit of worry coursed through you. Chan hadn't come back out. Not even when the other members came home, trying to knock on his door to greet him. Or when the food was ready to be served, you had even given knocking a try. Only after Hyunjin begged you to, because 'He already doesn't take care of himself. He needs to eat.' No, you didn't see him again that night until you had already walked out the front door. He slipped out behind you shortly after, grabbing you by the wrist and stopping you.Â
You thought he was going to continue the argument for a moment, but no, he was apologizing. Not much more was said afterwards, but his apology was genuine and heartfelt, so you accepted it. You two ended up hugging it out, and thank goodness no one saw that, because it was incredibly cringeworthy. He had no more major issues after that. But he was still unexplainably awkward around you, but it's not like you were any better. You two simply didn't know how to interact with each other for longer than 30 seconds. And that was pushing it. You suspected that might not ever go away. He likes to keep his walls high and strong, and you're stubborn at times.
But of course, despite that stubbornness. You developed some sort of feelings towards him. Feelings you refused to acknowledge, well tried to refuse. You would push those feelings down deep within your heart, put them in a little box, and tape it shut trying to forget it's there. There was no need to pine over the man, he had stay to do that for him, and who knows who else in his life. Somehow that box always ended up ripped open again.
There was never a reason to act on these feelings. Not to mention, you think you'd be breaking SO MANY rules. Putting your job, his job, hell everyone's job at risk. Or worse, making a fool of yourself when he would downright reject you.
You keep watching him, now he's shaking his leg up and down, seeming agitated. Maybe he just doesn't want everyone getting into a vulnerable state of mind while playing? Maybe he's worried somebody will say or do something wrong? That someone will cross a line, as he loves to say?
Trying to ease his negative feelings, and extend yet another olive branch. You toss a throw pillow at him, hitting him in the chest and pulling him out of his thoughts.
He looks at you, eyebrows wrinkled in confusion, and you just chuckle nervously at him saying, "Don't worry, it's like Vegas. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas."
"God how fuckin' corny was that?" Ji teases you, poking your side making you giggle more.
To your relief, Chan is laughing with you, and shaking his head, "I just want them to behave."
"Oh relax, we're all grown. We're all friends. So we'll get to know each other more intimately, big whoop." You shrug.
"Mmm..." He replied, before raising his voice so everyone could hear him, "Whatever is spoken about tonight, doesn't leave this room."
"I swear you're the one with anxiety sometimes, not me." Ji mumbles.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah... dad." Hyunjin says as he sits next to you and Ji.
"As if that announcement even had to be made, I swear, and you wonder why we call you old." Seungmin comments.
Once everyone is settled in with their drinks, Minho directs Chan to start the game.
"Jisung, when was the last time you cried?"
He laughed, "You're trying to embarrass me because you know it was this morning, but I am confident and secure in the fact that I am a sensitive man."
He said the last bit with his hand over his heart, and his eyes closed, effectively making everyone chuckle.
"My poor baby, why were you crying?" You question teasingly.
"Please don't bring it up, he'll start blubbering all over again. Stupid, sad, dog rescue videos." Seungmin mumbles.
"Minho!" Ji shouts, pointing at him dramatically, "This question is for you. If you had to kiss someone in this room on the cheek, who would it be?"
"Hyunjin." He said bluntly, making you and everyone else laugh while Hyune just rolled his eyes.
"Would you kiss me back?" He asked him, eyes full of hope and bottom lip jutted out and pouting, trying to act cute. And succeeding, honestly.
Hyunjin acted like he was pondering the question, but ultimately was the first to take a sip from his glass, "I decline to answer."
He looked to you next, a suggestive smirk on his face, making you the next victim, "Y/niiieee..."
"Oi, be respectful." Chan scolds immediately, not liking the look at all.
"All I was going to do was repeat the question!" He said defensively, "Y/n, if you had to choose, who would you kiss on the cheek?"
You tried hard to keep your eyes from trailing over to Chan, a tingly feeling spreading across your skin at the mere thought of innocently kissing his cheek. Instead you chose the easy answer, because it wasn't a lie. You'd also kiss your best friend on the cheek any time.
"My Jiji of course," And you took his face in one hand, squeezing his cheeks between your middle finger and thumb, and plant a loud smooch on each of them, "he probably only asked because he wanted one anyways."
He just chuckles, letting you baby him and Seungmin fake gags.
"Minnieee..." You pause trying to come up with a question, "when you dye your hair next, what color would you want?"
"Green, my entire head green."
"That would look interesting." You laugh.
You all go 'round in circles for a few rounds, completely forgetting about the rules of the game. Having now finished your glasses from casually sipping throughout the game, most of you have switched to occasional shots. You're starting to feel warm and tipsy. Of course the more you all drank, the more the questions started to get more... amorous. Which is exactly how you all assumed this game would go. No wonder Chan was so anxious.
However looking over to him now, he's definitely having a good time. Like every other person, he loosens up while drinking, but tonight he seems even more so.
"Y/n," Chan starts with a sly look making your skin buzz again. Among all of you, he is 100% the most inebriated right now, "when was your first kiss?"
"Yah! He tells us to be respectful, but look how he is after a few drinks!" Changbin yells laughing.
Chan loses it, "You're right Binnie, you don't have to answer or drink." He says in between fits of squeaky laughter.Â
You think you could listen to him laugh all day.
You shake your head and snort, "I've answered worse questions playing this game before. I was 13 when I had my first kiss."
Hyunjin nearly spits his drink out, because again, no one is drinking just as punishment anymore, "13?!"
"Well, yeah, it's a pretty normal age in America... I think..." you started to blush, "why, how old were you?" you ask Hyunjin.
He hesitates, but eventually he spoke, "I was 18."
The rest chime in saying they were also 18 or 19. With the exception of Felix who said he was 16.
Without even thinking you start to say, "Aaah, see I was 18 when I-" and you're abruptly stopped with Ji's hand slapping over your mouth.
Your eyes go wide, caught off guard, but understanding as you almost blurted out unnecessary information. Nothing that Ji hadn't known obviously, it's just that everyone else doesn't really know you on that level.Â
"Jagi, you only had to answer the one question, adding extra info, that's not how you play the gaaaaame." He says in a sing-song voice, "Hyunjin it's your turn to ask someone."
"No no no no! What was she going to say?" Chan chuckles.
When you looked at him, he winked at you, and you had to stop yourself from going limp in Ji's arms. He knew damn well what you were going to say. Why is he teasing, no torturing you like this?
You peel Ji's hand off your mouth to respond "It's not your turn, you'll have to wait to ask me that."
The group starts laughing and shouting, teasing Chan who is ignoring it all, just staring at you with curious eyes and his tongue in his cheek. Does he know how hot he looks doing that?
"Okay, so then I'll ask you. What were you going to say?" Hyunjin asks calmly, trying to fight the smile off his face.
You pour yet another shot, and knock it back thinking, what the hell, "I was going to say I was 18 when I first hooked up with a man."
Some members looked surprised, the game taking an obvious turn. However Hyunjin, Felix, and Chan started laughing again.
"I knew that's what you were going to say." Felix slurred.Â
"Yeah I was definitely teasing you on that, because I knew." Chan followed.
"Mmm, well judging from the shocked faces of everyone else, you two seem to be the only psychics." You try to joke, wanting the attention off of you suddenly.
"No, don't get us wrong, not all of us are as innocent as you think." Seungmin says defensively.
"Oh really now?" You respond, one brow quirking up.
Seungmin just turned red, and sat back in his seat. To which Chan started laughing, yet again. He's a giggly drunk, and you love it.
"Don't tease my puppy, babe." Ji slurred, trying to reach his arm to console Seungmin, but ultimately failing.
"I mean I was 18 too, with the same girl I first kissed." Hyunjin shrugged.
"But what do you mean 'to a man'?" Jeongin asked with a shit eating grin on his face.Â
You promptly turned into a tomato, and started choking on air.
"You're not that slow pabo, obviously it means she's been with women too." Ji says, rather loudly and speaking freely, all while patting your back.
You're quiet. It's not like it's a secret, you've never hidden your sexuality. But it never came up in conversation with anyone here, except Jisung.
Wanting to ease the tone, Felix speaks up, "Well I was 18 when I first hooked up with a dude."
"I was 21, but everyone already knows that story." Ji slurred.
The whole conversation triggers another group laughing fit. Except for Chan, who is looking at you with those dark eyes again. And... is he blushing? Or is that the alcohol? He eventually snaps out of whatever daze he was in, and slowly smiles at you reassuringly.
You mentally kick yourself for getting your hopes up, of course he couldn't ever think of you like that. You're imagining things.
"But then, how old were you when you first hooked up with a girl?" Jeongin asked again, genuinely curious.
"A lot younger than 18..." You trailed off laughing, "I'll just say in high school."
"The air is different outside of Korea." Changbin says suddenly, sounding thoughtful.
Hyunjin nearly collapsed laughing, slapping Minho on the knee repeatedly, despite the glare he was shooting him.
"Well I just answered a bunch of questions in a row so that means I get to ask two people a question. And the second person I ask gets the next turn." You say, making up new rules.Â
"So... Chan." He looks at you with his eyebrows raised and you just smirk, knowing you're trying to get back at him, "How old were YOU when you lost your virginity?"
He gulps and looks around at the group before answering, "I... was 18."
"Chan-hyung, you never answered us when we would ask you! Why answer her?" Jisung whines.
"I honestly don't know, maybe it's the liquor. None of you ever asked me drunk." He starts giggling.
"Okay so question 2... Binnie!" He gulps and looks at you with wide eyes, "Are you more of a boob guy?" You say grabbing your own, not even really thinking about it, "Or an ass guy?"
Changbin started laughing and answered, "Definitely ass, but I appreciate boobs too, equality."
"I am just learning so much about my fellow members lately." Seungmin whispers.
"Is that a bad thing?" You giggle.
"Not at all, it feels strangely comforting, letting loose like this." He replies and smiles softly at me, "It's been a while."
"It's freeing!" Jeongin yells abruptly, throwing his hands in the air.
"Aye, my question is for you then Min. Have you ever had a wet dream?" Changbin asks.
"... what guy hasn't? Don't all guys get them?" He asks looking around.
Then you chime in again frankly, "Girls can get them too you know."
Why does it feel like you've opened pandora's box on your sex life, in every single aspect?
Ji starts laughing, nodding his head vigorously and you know where this is about to go.
"Really now?" Felix says, mimicking your exact tone from earlier, "What was it about?"
"Mmmm... it's not your turn to ask," Then you turn to Seungmin, "And if you ask me, I will absolutely drink and not answer. No way I'm explaining a sex dream right now."
Seungmin just rolls his eyes and huffs out a laugh.
"But I wanna knooooooow," Jisung whines, "You looked so cute having one last weekend, you never told me what it was about."
Everyone was watching you two closely now, waiting to hear how he knew what you looked like in that situation.
You turned around and smacked his arm, "We weren't going to mention that ever again! Remember?!" You attempt to be angry, but you can't help it and end up smiling.
"Okay, well now I'm curious since you two are bringing this up." Minho says with a glint in his eye.
"Y/n may or may not have had one when I slept over, and I woke up to her moaning and hump--"
This time it was your turn to slap a hand over his mouth, "Jiji, Sungie, my love, my sweet sweet SWEET best friend. I don't want to kill you, but I will." You say in a dulcet tone.
He raised his hands, eyes wide and nodded his head. You couldn't help but laugh, apparently you're a giggly drunk too.
Out of the corner of your eye, you swore you saw Chan adjusting himself in his pants. But then you reminded yourself that it was just wishful thinking and an alcohol induced hallucination. Horny hallucination. God you needed to get over him and under someone else. This unrequited shit wasn't for you.
"I'm so never going to drop this you know, I wanna know what the hell happened." Minho smirked at you, to which you flipped him off jokingly.
It's Seungmin's turn next, and he's just staring at Jeongin with a blank face, "Have you ever had a one night stand?"
He pauses for a moment and then finally answers, "No, I haven't."
He looked at you now, asking his question, "You know what I have to ask now, right?"
"Go ahead." You challenge, fully prepared to choke down another shot and not answer his question, and he smiles.
"What's one of your kinks?"
You were unprepared for that question. And how could you know he would ask that, these men like to fuck around with your head.
"Relax, I just wanted to see your reaction." He says before chuckling.
You glared at him for a moment, halfheartedly. They think they can just retract questions when they get scared that they went too far. Screw that, you're answering.
"I guess the most simple one I have is edging." You shrug.
"The most simple one?!" Hyunjin asked.
"What are you a masochist? Edging is the worst, feels like torture to me." Ji says.
"But the build up is so delicious, and the end result is so worth it. It's so intense." Felix chimes in, "Choking too, that can be intense."Â
"Hm, breath play might actually be my favorite." You admit.
"Damn y/n." Ji says, eyeing you with a smile, "You're full of surprises, even to this day."Â
You shrug again, "Everyone has different kinks... What's one of yours?" You ask him.
He ponders for a moment, "I like being dommed sometimes."
"Big surprise." Minho says and you all laugh.
"Good one though," You nod, "That's one of mine too."
"I think I'm an exhibitionist, to an extent of course." Hyunjin says next.
"That's also not a surprise." Minho replies.
You can't help but let your eyes wander over to Chan again, while everyone else is sharing different things they're into in bed. The liquor has everyone speaking loosely. But Chan doesn't seem to care about it anymore.
You find him staring right back at you, that same look in his eyes from earlier, and you feel heat spread in your stomach, and wetness starts to pool in your panties. Maybe you weren't imagining things.
But you don't notice that Ji's observing both of you in his drunken haze. Not too faded to ignore you and Chan eye-fucking each other.
Your heart starts racing the longer you hold eye contact, and you start shifting uncomfortably on his lap, before looking away and deciding to get up.
"Alright... I need some bread to soak up this alcohol, and then I need to get home because it's already 2 in the morning." You say with a shaky breath.
"Yeah, I'm wasted right now," Jeongin says and stands, "Bed's a good idea. Goodnight everyone." And he leaves to his room.
Ji grabs your wrist, preventing you from moving, "You're not going anywhere. We're all drunk, you can't drive and no one can bring you back home."
"Fiiiiiiine," You say, "but I still want bread."
"You and your bread fixation whenever you drink." Minho mumbles, heading to the kitchen anyways to grab you some.
When he comes back he hands it to you and you start munching away happily, doing a little dance.
Meanwhile, Felix is trying to tug Chan's arms to make him stand up, but he's fighting him on it and whining. Clearly he exceeded his limit tonight drinking. He probably won't even remember the looks he was giving you, you think.
"I don't wanna go to bed." Chan whines.
Felix finally succeeds in pulling him up, "C'mon mate, you definitely need to sleep this off. You'll be miserable tomorrow. Let's get you some water too, hmm?"
Chan reluctantly holds his arm, and follows him down the hall, stumbling over his own two feet along the way. You can't help but laugh at the sight.
More of the boys say goodnight and head off to their rooms, but Ji and Minho stay with you in the living room, chatting a little longer before bed.
Ji starts going through his bags, determined that you left some pajamas here from when you slept over previously, and he kept them in a bag to give back to you. He pulls out the nightie, that you honestly forgot you brought here. But you see why you didn't ever wear it at the time. It's dark green, spaghetti straps and has lace along the bust line. It also has slits on each side of your thigh, and only covers you to the middle of your thighs. Your go to sleepware was always nighties or large tees, they're comfortable and sometimes you get hot at night. Mix in the fact that you were drinking tonight? You're already feeling overheated. But wearing this?
"Jiiiiiii, don't you have any t-shirts I can wear?" You whine.
He's already under the covers, fighting sleep, "Sorry babe... haven't done laundry... Nothing clean..."
You whine again before taking it and heading across the hall into one of the bathrooms. It was this or sleep in your sweats, and that idea sounded entirely too suffocating to you.
You slip the nightie on and brush your teeth with your designated toothbrush you had there. Jisungs idea, after you had too much tequila one night and he diligently held your hair back as you got sick.
You sigh as you're leaving, and make your way towards Ji's room. Before you reach the door though, Chan walks out of his room. He's in a black tank top, and red boxer briefs... your eyes immediately trail down and go wide. His outline clear as day. But you change your view quickly, hopefully before he notices.
It doesn't help though, now all you're doing is eyeing his arms, the muscles cut throughout them. The veins that trail all the way down to his hands. God, his hands... What wouldn't you let those hands do to you...
He scratches the back of his head, and the movement snaps you out of your gaze. You find him staring back at you for a second before answering, "Sorry, I'll just..."
You start to shake your head, "No, no. No reason to apologize." You chuckle and start shifting on your feet. You feel the skirt of your nightie swaying with you. It opened the slit wider, and Chan immediately looked down at your exposed thigh. He inhaled quietly, sucking in air through his nose.
Any other day, you'd be scrambling to cover yourself. Feeling insecure and too bare. You don't know if it was the liquor in you, but tonight? Being on display? It turned you on.
You clenched your thighs together, almost involuntarily, and Chan didn't miss that.
Time seemed to be moving too slow. He stepped towards you, nearly closing the gap between you. He's only inches away, and looking down on you. His eyes have that dark, smoldery look again. He raised his hand and brushed the curls off your face and behind your ear. When he rests his palm against your cheek, your eyes flutter shut and you lean into his touch. It's so warm, and comforting. As if it was always meant for you.
When you open your eyes, you can clearly see the lust in his is only growing. He's not holding it back anymore, biting his lip as he stares at you. You almost whimper in anticipation.
"This is your opportunity to walk away if you're not okay with me kissing you." He says lowly.
You closed your eyes, and his lips met yours. The first few seconds were sweet and soft. Almost too innocent for the heat of the moment, but then he deepened it. He was pulling you by the waist into him, running his hands down and resting them on your ass. You could easily feel how hard he was for you, even through the thin fabrics. This time you let the whimper out, and he swiped his tongue along your bottom lip before sucking it into his mouth. When you tried to do the same, he didn't give you the chance. Instead he slipped his tongue in. It was like he was lost in desire, and greedy for more. You couldn't help it when your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer.
He groaned and started backing you into the wall, his lips never leaving yours. He grabbed your thighs in each hand, and hoisted you up, slotting himself between them. Your legs naturally wrapped around him, and he started rocking his length against you. His pace was achingly slow, but still delicious.
You moaned and slipped a hand up to the nape of his neck, grabbing a fistful of hair. He breaks the kiss and throws his head back with his eyes closed. He half hisses, half groans, and you can't help but rock your hips against him harder, hoping to hear more. He grips your thigh tighter, and leans down to press a quick kiss to your neck, before licking and sucking on it. He's meeting each roll of your hips with rough thrusts. And even clothed, you feel how perfectly he's rubbing your clit.
Your head is so clouded with need. Need to be touched. Need to touch him. Need to feel him inside of you. You don't even think twice when he glides his hand up your stomach, and over your breasts. He gives one a light squeeze before moving up to wrap his fingers around your neck, and your brain loses all sense for a moment.
He's just resting his hand there, but you wish he'd do more. You're not sure if this man knows just how pliant you are for him right now.
Then he brings his lips to your ear and whispers, "Can I touch you?"
His warm breath gives you chills, and you nod your head as best as you can. But that doesn't suffice him, he stops his movements against you and his grip around your throat tightens. You think you could probably get off on it if he tightens his fingers just a bit more, but he doesn't, instead he says, "I'm going to need words, babygirl."
Your hips buck into him, and you breathe out a quiet "Yes. Please..."
With that, he yanks your face closer to his by your neck. He's squeezing ever so slightly tighter around your throat. He bites your lip and you groan. But he's quick to silence you with his tongue.
Letting go, he trailed his hand back down your body and to your core. Slowly he started to rub you through the thin lace. You were so sensitive, that when he found your clit and pressed a circle into it. You couldn't help but breathe out his name. He pushed your panties to the side, and when he felt you for the first time you felt him smile against your lips.
"Babygirl... fuck, you're so wet for me."Â
And as he whispered that, he slipped a finger in you. He set a steady pace, dragging against your walls with a curl. Each pump hitting your sweet spot, and the heel of his hand creating delightful friction against your swollen bud. His breathing was heavy in your ear, breaking through all your helpless whimpering. When he added a second finger, you couldn't hold back anymore.
"Chan..." You moaned louder this time, while simultaneously letting your head drop against the wall with a thud.
He pulled his lips off of you, eyes wide when he met yours. He started blinking as if he was coming back to reality. When he looked into your eyes again, he looked startled.
"What's wrong?" You pant, feeling hot and dizzy, wishing he would keep moving his hands.
Instead, he quickly slips his fingers out of you, and sets your feet on the floor. Then he backs away.
"I'm sorry, y/n... I don't know what came over me, that was incredibly inappropriate and out of character." Chan mumbled.
Your heart sinks, as you feel the sting of rejection. Tears threatened to well in your eyes, and you immediately felt the oncoming headache from holding them back. You shouldn't feel so emotional and upset. This was all spur of the moment. But you do, you feel devastated.
Regardless, you clear your throat, "I understand." You force an unsettling chuckle out, when a sob threatens to escape instead.
He puts on a blank face that feels so cold, and responds with "Don't forget to drink some water, stay hydrated... I'll be heading to bed now, you should too."
All you really want to say is don't leave, because you want to finish what was started. Because you've wanted this for so long. Because the box you kept away in the depths of your heart had ripped open once again. And all the languished emotions were here, front and center, aching to bear it all to him. To let him see. Confess. But that would be selfish, he's clearly uncomfortable with it all. He probably regrets it. An alcohol induced affair. In his eyes, a complete mistake.Â
So instead you say, "Okay."
Because that's all you can muster before the tears start to fall. You turn away, going back to facing Ji's door.Â
"Goodnight y/n... Sleep well." He says, and puts a tentative hand on your shoulder.
You shrug it off, and escape to Ji's bedroom. To your surprise he's sitting up in bed, and ushering you come to him with his arms open and bottom lip pouted out.
You run to him, a bit dramatically and fall a part in his arms. But you can't help it, you sealed these emotions away for too long. You were too hurt at the moment to even try pushing them back down.
Jisung is your life saver, he's comforting you, rubbing his fingers on your scalp and rocking you back and forth to try and calm you. He gives you time before you have to explain why exactly you're having a melt down.
"Chan's an idiot." He finally says.
And you lean back to look at him, confused on how quickly he's put two and two together.
"Well you weren't exactly quiet. Between your exaggerated moans and his animalistic grunting right outside my door, of course I heard it." He rolled his eyes jokingly and that earned a laugh from you.
You smacked him lightly, "I was lost in the moment... don't judge me."
"Jagi..." He says, and wipes the tears from your cheeks with his thumbs, "You've liked him for so much longer than a moment."
Your heart starts pounding faster again. How could he know that. It's the one thing you've kept from him, from everyone, hell you even denied it to yourself for as long as possible. Was it that obvious? Who else knows? You go to speak, fear written across your face.
"No. You were not obvious, in fact you're an amazing actor. I'm sure none of the other members noticed, and definitely no one else at work knew." He answers before you can even get words out.
You nod slowly, "So then, how'd you know?"
He smiled proudly, "I'm a people watcher, I see all."
You smack him again, a little harder this time.
"Alright, alright, but I really did see all the looks you'd give him when no one else was watching... I know what longing looks like, and..." he trailed off.
You knew that wasn't all, "And?"
"Aaaaand... maybe that night you had that wet dream. You were moaning his name while humping the pillow..."
"You never told me that!" You shoved your head into your hands, distraught.
"Well I didn't want to embarrass you! I honestly didn't think you looked at any of us that way until then. Like I said, a good actor. I figured you'd tell me when you were ready to."
You sighed, "I'm sorry. It's just a stupid crush, it'll pass."
"You're grown, you don't have to apologize to anyone for liking someone. But y/n," He cupped your cheek forcing you to look at him again, "this isn't just a simple crush, is it?"
With that question, you felt the tears spilling all over again. He pulled you to lay down with him, holding you tight against him and letting you cry it all out. Somewhere between his low humming, and your quiet weeping, you fell asleep.
When you blink the sleep away from your eyes the next morning, you're still entangled with Ji. He's literally wrapped around you like a koala.
You snort out a laugh and go to check the time on your phone. 7:30 am, entirely too early. You decide to try and fall back asleep, but last night's events rush back to you. Dread fills your chest, and your fight or flight kicks in. You're trying to gently escape Ji's hold, and not hyperventilate. The latter is more difficult but, since that man can sleep through anything, you were able to succeed.
You get changed back into your clothes, and leave a note for him saying that you're leaving and you'll text him when you get home. You can't bear to face Chan, let alone anyone else who might've heard you two last night. So you decide to skip out on the usual coffee and breakfast routine. You all have that tradition after a drunken night, but you know Ji will cover for you with everyone anyways.
You're rushing down the hall, wanting to grab your things and head for the door. Panic is starting to bubble over, and you're haphazardly covering yourself up to be unnoticeable. As you're slipping the mask over your face, a voice stops you.
"Morning... don't you want to stay for breakfast?"
You can't bring yourself to look at Chan, those words only setting the box of emotions in your heart on fire. You know he only means it in the way that it is an unbroken tradition. No matter how sick one of you gets, group breakfast is a must for recuperation. No one has skipped it in the months you've been doing it. We all take care of each other. But the idea makes your mouth bitter, because you wish it was just you two. Alone. Making breakfast the morning after earth shattering sex. And the fact he doesn't mean it in that way in the slightest makes tears prick back into your eyes.
Yes, you know you're being petty. You should stick it through for your friends. Take a page from Chan and act like nothing ever happened. You just can't find it inside you to care, you need to go home and lick your wounds before facing anyone here again. Call it childish, but you didn't care.
You're struggling to find words and just blurt out, "No thanks." And rush out the door, heading to the safety of your car.
You left Chan standing there. Unbeknownst to you, hurting just as much.
Special thank you to @jeonginsleftcheek who encouraged me through finishing this! I had finished it, and then accidentally deleted the entire ending. But in turn, that was a good thing I think... because now there'll be a part 2! If you'd like to be added to a taglist, let me know and I'll start one! Feedback is always cherished, but be gentle pleeeeeeeease âĄ
#bangchan x reader#bangchan x you#bangchan x y/n#bangchan x female reader#bangchan smut#bangchan angst#bang chan x reader#bang chan x you#bang chan x y/n#bang chan x female reader#bangchan fanfic#bang chan fanfic#bang chan smut#bang chan angst#skz x reader#skz fanfic#skz smut#skz angst#stray kids fanfic#stray kids smut#stray kids angst#smut#angst#fanfic#fan fiction#choking#hand fixation#bang chans hands#best friend!jisung#kaysungshine fics
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bsf!rafe who gives you cunt inspections whenever you come back from hanging with your girlfriends. doesnât matter if youâve told him that no guys are gonna be there, he needs to see it. he needs to pull apart your sticky folds and take a closer look at your pretty cunt to make sure no one else has defiled you. heâs protecting you, why canât you see that? of course you guys arenât together, youâre just best friends. but if rafe says he has to inspect you, his âbestest friend in the worldâ as coined by you, then surely itâs not wrong, right? heâs just making sure no one is taking advantage of you. rafeâs just being a good friend! majority of the time theyâre strictly inspections too. he doesnât play with you after, doesnât rub your clit once heâs sure youâre empty, doesnât trail kisses down to your clenching hole. just leaves you high and (not so) dry, pathetically desperate for more.
#bsf!rafe#best friend!rafe#rafe cameron#rafe#rafe x you#rafe fanfiction#rafe smut#rafe x reader#rafe imagine#rafe blurb#rafe prompt#rafe fic#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron prompt#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x reader#outer banks#outerbanks#outer banks blurb#outerbanks smut#outerbanks x reader#obx#obx blurb#obx smut#obx x reader#rafe obx#obx fic
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tenderly, tragically
Description: Silly, lifelong best-friendship leads to a lot of meaningless teasing. Though, sometimes teasing comes from a place of truth. Itâs just that sometimes, those getting teased are the last to know why.
Pairing: Best friend!James Potter x fem!Reader
Warnings: fluff, some angst, smut 18+ (p in v, praise kink, whiny james, size kink, first time for both), drinking, its really idiots to lovers
Word Count: 7.8k (just fluff): 9.4k (smut)
A/N: smut is at the end, and thereâs a warning before it starts since itâs kind of like an alternate ending/extra bit. if you JUST want fluff, it ends at a good point for that before the smut starts :) ALSO: as with all of my marauders fics, characters are aged up (19-20)
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âJamie,â I squeal a laugh, chasing after him.
He laughs, continuing to out-run me. The bastard.
âNot my fault youâre slow,â he calls back. âCatch up, love, or youâll get caught.â
I run harder, jumping on his back when I get close enough. We both knew heâd slowed down to let me get closer, but neither of us bothered to mention it. He laughed, holding onto my legs as they wrapped around his waist, slowing until he was walking.
âYouâre going to get us caught, you know that?â
I snort a laugh. âPlease. There wasnât even anybody there.â
He rolls his eyes playfully, finally dropping me from his back, and instead slinging an arm around my shoulders.
âThey could have, though.â
âBut they didnât,â I say pointedly. âBesides, Remus, Peter, and Sirius are still actually in the Slytherin dorms. Lousy look-outs we are because of you.â
He chuckles, walking us towards the stairs.
âTheyâll be fine,â he shrugs with a cocky smirk. âBesides, I doubt even most of the Slytherins would object to a little prank on Snivellus.â
I hum, nodding a little. âI guess. Still. Youâre a bad friend.â
âYou ran too,â he accused, his brow furrowing. âDonât go and pin all this on me.â
âYou told me to run!â
âYou didnât have to listen!â
I scoff, shaking my head. He gives me an irritated look, but pulls me a little closer under his arm. We get into the common room, and without even asking, he starts ushering me to their dorm room.
âWhy?â I ask, knowing he knows what Iâm asking.
âSue me for wanting to spend some time with my life-long friend,â he says, quirking a brow.
I push him away from me, but he doesnât really let me get far. He opens his door, pushing me in first. I immediately flop onto his bed face-first.
âNot complaining now, are you?â he asks, laying next to me.
âNot my fault your bed is so comfy,â I say, my voice muffled by the mattress.
I feel the mattress dip, and look up to see him also turned on his stomach, right next to me.
âIf you really wanted to get me alone this bad you couldâve asked,â I say with a wink.
He rolls his eyes, but a smile gives him away.
âPlease. I know youâre secretly hoping for it, but we both know thatâs never going to happen.â
âMe?â I laugh. âAs if. What would I do with a quidditch player?â
He scoffs, an offended look on his face.
âIâll have you know that I am very desirable, and half of that has to do with the fact Iâm the seeker, thank you.â
I roll my eyes. âUh huh. And whatâs the other half?â
âYou seen this face?â he asks, a cocky smirk on his lips.
âUnfortunately I have.â
âYouâre mean,â he says, a laugh breaking up his attempt to be offended.
He pushes me a bit, but I hardly budge. I laugh at his attempt, but apparently that was the wrong thing to do. He perks up, trying harder to fully push me off the bed, now.
âHey!â I say in protest, fighting back against him.
He laughs, both of us practically fighting as he keeps trying to push me off. I see an opportunity a moment later and take it: I grab onto one of his arms with both of mine.
âHa!â I say loudly. âCanât push me off now unless you also fall off.â
He pauses, then an evil smirk comes onto his face. My face drops as I realize what heâs about to do. He scoots over, dropping both of us onto the ground. I squeal as we fall, and I end up taking the brunt of the fall as he lands on top of me.
âYou should never threaten me with a good time. You know I canât resist,â he says, not bothering to alleviate the pressure of his body pinning me down.
I groan. âYou suck. I didnât think youâd actually push both of us off just to get me.â
âThen you donât know me very well,â he replies with a quirked brow.
âPlease. I know you better than anyone and you know it.â
He opens his mouth to snark back at me, but the door opens before he gets a chance.
âYou two are the worst,â Sirius says, clearly out of breath. Then, he scoffs as more footsteps follow behind him. âAnd look at this! They ran off on us to⊠Canoodle on the floor.â
I furrow my brow, pulling a face as I try to see him around James.
âCanoodle?â I repeat in disgust.
James finally starts getting off of me, kneeling on the ground next to me as I start pulling myself up. Remus and Peter give us a look.
âWeâre not⊠canoodling, and you can blame Prongs for us ditching. Heâs the one who took off running and told me I had to, too.â
Remus quirks a brow at that as Sirius goes to sit on his bed.
âYou didnât have to listen to him,â Peter pipes up.
âThatâs what I told her,â James says, giving me a self-satisfied look.
I make a sour face at him, pushing his arm a little. He pushes me back, and I straighten up. Though, Remus must notice that look on me.
âDonât you two start up again,â he says, pointedly looking between us. âIf I have to watch you two flirt any more I might throw up.â
âWeâre not flirting,â James grumbles. âSheâs just fun to mess with.â
âMm. And youâre just easy to win a fight against,â I add.
He looks at me quickly. âYou didnât win the last one.â
âBecause you pushed us both off the bed!â I exclaim.
âOh, shut it, you two,â Sirius says, his arm draped over his face. âWeâve been back for three days and youâre already acting up.â
I snort a laugh at Siriusâs annoyance, climbing back onto Jamesâs bed. I sigh with my face in the pillows, feeling him climb over me to get to the other side a second later.
âYou got us in trouble,â he whispers.
âYour fault, not mine,â I reply.
âYouâre the one who insulted my perfect face.â
âYouâre the one who pushed me first,â I argue back.
âOi!â Sirius calls out again, leaving us both laughing.
Our first few weeks of school go off without a hitch. The boys continue pulling their little pranks, occasionally dragging me along with them. I settle into my space this year, glad to still have Lily, Marlene, and Dorcas as my roommates. We always tended to get along quite well.
I start reading a new book one night, absolutely enraptured with the story, probably even more so considering itâs helping me to avoid the homework that I really should be doing. I get through the first couple chapters before I notice Lily staring at me.
âWhat is it, Lils?â
âCan I tell you something?â Lily asks suddenly.
She looks around the room, seemingly to make sure the other girls are really gone for whatever sheâs about to say.
I look at her over my book. âSure.â
âPromise not to tell anyone?â
I nod. âPromise.â
She sighs, sitting up a little straighter. âI think I have a thing for someone⊠Well, for James.â
My eyes widen. âReally? You wanted nothing to do with him a little while ago.â
âI know. I just⊠I donât know. Maybe Iâm just bored or something, but Iâve been thinking about telling him.â
I nod. âYeah. You should.â
âReally?â she asks, surprised.
âWhy not?â
She smiles to herself. âYeah. Why not? Do you think heâll say it back?â
I shrug. âI donât know. Maybe? He did have a crush on you before.â
She hums to herself. I laugh a little, shaking my head.
âI think Iâll do it tomorrow. Better to do it sooner than later, yeah?â
âYeah, I guess so,â I shrug noncommittally. I really just wanted to get back to my book.
âYou donât even care,â she groans after a moment.
âThis is a really good book, Lils,â I laugh.
âFine. Iâll stop bothering you.â
âThanks,â I smirk to myself.
She scoffs again, though I know she isnât really offended. I wish her good luck as we head off to our classes that day, knowing she was planning on telling James sometime in the morning.
I end up finding him later, though I try not to press for answers the second I do. We sit on the grass in the late afternoon, watching some first years play a little quidditch match for fun. Itâs uncharacteristically warm outside, and the sun shines down on us. After half an hour of watching the kids play, I glance at James.
âI wanna show you something,â I say suddenly, standing.
James looks up at me in confusion. âIâd prefer not to move.â
I roll my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest.
âItâs a nice day. Sunny and no clouds. Please, just follow me?â I ask, almost whining. âPromise youâll like it.â
He leans back on his hands. âHow do you know?â
âBecause I found a secret place in the woods, and youâll be the first person besides me to see it,â I offer.
He quirks a brow. âYeah?â
âYeah. Now get up.â
He grumbles to himself as he gets up, following me as we walk towards the woods. I start leading him through the trees towards the destination I had in mind.
âWhat were you even doing in here? Itâs dangerous,â he says quietly.
âI was fine. Just had a long day and wanted to explore. It was in the daytime anyway,â I say matter-of-factly.
He hums to himself, clearly dissatisfied that I went out here by myself. But as I finally lead him to our destination, his annoyance wears off.
âWhoa,â he says, his eyes a little wide.
I smile. âSee? Told you it would be worth your while.â
He looks on at the small clearing. Thereâs a little pond with clear water, the space in the trees allowing some sunlight to reflect on the water. It looks peaceful at least, and nearly-heavenly at best. I look at him expectantly.
âHowâd you find this?â he asks, squatting by the water. He dips his hand it. âWhoa. Itâs warm.â
I nod, still standing. âI found it when I was exploring, like I said. A few weeks ago. I charmed the water to stay warm, so Iâve been out here two or three times to swim. Thought Iâd show you before it gets too cold.â
He smiles, standing up. âYou want to go swimming? You didnât bring anyââ
His eyes widen as he finally looks at me. At this point, Iâve already started taking off my robes and my shirt.
âWhat?â I ask, brows furrowed. âYou act like youâve never been around me getting dressed. Weâve been friends since we were like six years old. Now, hurry up. Faster you get undressed, the faster we get to swim.â
He rolls his eyes at me, begrudgingly taking off his clothes, even though part of him still looks excited that Iâd found such a nice little place.
I start wading in once Iâm down to my underwear, the water feeling nice and warm in contrast to the slightly-cool air. I hear him come in after me in a moment, and turn to watch him.
âNice, isnât it?â
âCanât believe you were hiding this from me,â he says, hiding a smirk.
âOh, please,â I reply, floating on my back in the water. âYouâre lucky I showed you at all. Nobody else knows about this. You should feel honored.â
I hear him hum and splash around a little, though my eyes are closed. I bask in the warmth of the sunlight on my face.
âDid Lils talk to you today?â I ask after a few minutes of silence.
âYeah.â
I upright myself, looking at him as he aimlessly walks around in the water.
âAnd?â
He glances at me, giving a shrug. âI donât know.â
âYou donât know?â I press, furrowing my brow. âWhatâs that supposed to mean? What did you guys talk about?â
âI have a feeling you already know,â he snorts a laugh.
I roll my eyes, wading closer to him. âSo she told you?â
âYep.â
âWell, what happened? What did you say?â
He sighs dramatically. âDoes it matter?â
I splash him a little. âIâm gonna hear about it no matter what. Sheâs my roommate. Just wanted to know from you before I see Lily later.â
âTold her I wasnât interested,â he says quietly, splashing me back a little.
I pause. âWhy? You always had a massive crush on her.â
âNot in, like, a year,â he says.
âSo you just rejected her?â
âI didnât reject her,â he furrows his brows, looking away from me. âShe told me she liked me, and I just told her I wasnât into her like that. She didnât ask me a question, so it wasnât a rejection. Just being honest.â
I groan. âJamie, sheâs going to kill me. Iâm the one who encouraged her to tell you.â
His eyes widened. âWhy the hell would you do that?â
âI thought you liked her!â
He pauses for a moment, then splashes me again, this time fully soaking me. I scoff a laugh, in shock as the water hits me. I glare at him, then splash him back just as hard. He starts going on the attack, practically throwing the water at me repeatedly.
âYou absolute tosser,â I say, continuing to splash back, though I canât help but laugh.
I start backing up as we both continue, now laughing and barely able to see with how rapid-fire weâre going. Eventually, I turn and start running for the shore as much as I can while being chest-deep in water. I squeal as I hear him closing in on me.
âNo, no, no,â I laugh, getting closer and closer to safety.
âShouldâve thought about trying to run a little harder, love,â James says back, still giggling to himself.
He catches up to me when the water is finally below my hips, and grabs around the waist, pulling both of us backwards. The water goes over our heads for a moment, and I gasp out a laugh as we emerge again. He sits us up in the pond.
I turn in his arms, smacking him lightly on the chest. âYouâre awful!â
âYou love me,â he smiles brightly, still sitting on the ground in the shallow water. He pulls me in a little closer. âYouâre just mad that I won.â
âStill canât believe you said you didnât like her,â I say, brushing some of his wet curls away from his eyes.
âNot gonna lie to the girl,â he shrugs, swatting away my hand.
âStill. I thought for sure youâd be excited.â
âHm. I donât know. Maybe a couple years ago, but not anymore.â
âAt this point Iâm convinced youâre driving girls away on purpose. When was the last time you dated someone?â I laugh.
He looks at me, mockingly offended. âExcuse me?â
âWhat?â I exclaim, still laughing. âLast girl I remember seeing you with was some Ravenclaw a few quidditch wins ago, and even then, you were just sucking face because you were drunk.â
He finally pushes me away from him, trying to hide a smile. I chuckle, gaining my bearings, and finally landing comfortably on my knees in the water a foot away from him.
âYou wouldnât be so offended if I were wrong,â I tease.
âYeah? And whenâs the last time you dated somebody?â
I scoff. âYou scare off every boy who tries to ask me out.â
âCause theyâre all ridiculous,â he states, making a face. âAre you seriously telling me you wanted to go out with that Johnny kid from Hufflepuff?â
I smirk. âTouchĂ©. But still, itâs not my fault Iâm not dating anyone. You, on the other handâŠâ
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â he quirks a brow.
âYouâve got all kinds of girls chasing after you. Whatâs your excuse?â
He pauses for a moment, then smirks. âWho else would waste all their time with you if I were too busy with some girl? Youâd be all alone. Iâm doing you a service by staying single.â
âPlease. You and that ego, I swear,â I shake my head. âI have plenty of friends outside of you.â
âIâm the best one, though,â he says, a brow raised with a cocky smile.
I make a face, then splash him once more for good measure.
âThatâs it,â he mumbles, tackling me.
I yell a little with a laugh as his arm wraps around my back and drops me onto the bank where the water was scarce. I keep my head propped up as much as I can, though the rest of me is still covered in a little bit of water. It doesnât help that James is pressing me into the ground.
âAdmit it. I am the single greatest person youâve ever met.â
I laugh again. âIn your dreams.â
âNot letting you up until you admit it.â
âGuess weâre stuck here forever, then,â I argue back.
âGuess so,â he says plainly, dropping his full weight on me. I groan, my breath getting squeezed from me. âBest to make myself comfortable, then.â
âYouâre so heavy,â I whine.
He chuckles, just quietly observing me for a moment. I tilt my head in question as he doesnât snark back. He swallows, a small smile still on his face, but a little bit of color now in his cheeks. My eyes widen a little bit.
âJamieââ
He doesnât give me a chance to get anything else out, his lips pressing to mine softly. I freeze, in shock at the sudden change of circumstance. My best friend is kissing me. He stays there for a moment, and only pulls away when he realizes I wasnât kissing him back, his cheeks taking on a deeper shade.
âIâm sorry, I donâtâŠâ he shakes his head, looking at me with his lips still parted. âI shouldnât have done that. Iâm sorry.â
He gets off of me quickly, getting out of the pond and back to where we left our clothes. He casts a drying spell on himself and starts getting dressed. Meanwhile, Iâm still in the water, feeling like Iâm stuck. I swallow with a dry throat, turning to see him starting to pull on his pants. I finally get up, quickly moving towards him.
âJamieââ
âIâm sorry, I donât know why I did that,â he shakes his head, not looking at me.
I let out a frustrated groan. âWe have to talk about that, James.â
âNot right now. Just,â he sighs, looking at me quickly. He takes out his wand again, casting that same drying spell on me. âGet dressed. We donât want to miss dinner.â
I stare at him for a moment as he continues putting his clothes on, then finally move to get mine on. We finish getting dressed in an uncomfortable silence, that kiss playing on repeat in my mind. Why would he do that?
I look at him when Iâm done to see him staring at his shoes, his hands shoved in his pockets. I walk nearer to him, though he takes half a step back when he notices. I furrow my brow.
âDonât start that.â
âStart what?â he asks, his voice uncharacteristically quiet.
âPulling away from me,â I say, grabbing his arm and tugging him closer to me. âI donât know what just happened, but Iâm not going to lose you as a friend all because youââ
âIâm not pulling away from you,â he rolls his eyes. âI justâ I donât want to⊠Iâm embarrassed. I shouldnât have done that.â
âYou donât need to be embarrassed.â
He scoffs. âRight, because thereâs nothing embarrassing about trying to kiss your best friend while she looks at you like youâre crazy.â
I sigh. âI just didnât know what was happening. Youâve never done anything like that before.â
He looks away, chewing at his lip. âCan we just forget about it? I really donât⊠I didnât mean to.â
I fall quiet for a minute, trying to gather my thoughts, but theyâre all seeming to escape me. I let go of his arm, taking in a deep breath.
âYou know I love you, right?â I ask.
He nods. âYeah. I know.â
âOkay. Yeah, we can forget about it,â I nod. âYou want to go get dinner, then? I heard a rumor theyâll have those apple tarts you like.â
He looks at me, smiling a little bit. âYeah?â
I nod again, smiling back. âWould I lie?â
He chuckles a little, nodding towards the way we came into the woods. I start leading the way back out until we see the castle again. He catches up to me at that point.
âSorry again,â he says quietly.
âAbout what?â I ask, raising a brow. âAll I remember is us swimming around. Unless youâre apologizing for tackling me in the pond, in which case, youâre forgiven only if you get me some chocolate frogs next time weâre in Hogsmeade.â
He smiles a little. âYeah. Promise I will.â
âGood,â I say, knocking into his shoulder a little.
He nudges me back. Of course. I go a little harder the next time I knock into him, until weâre both practically pushing one another over as we head towards the castle. He gives me a particularly hard shove, barely catching me by the arm before I actually fall to the ground. Weâre out of breath from laughing when we finally get to the castle, feeling wonderfully back to normal by the time we reach the Great Hall.
We walk up to the marauders, taking our usual seat across from the three boys.
âHey,â I greet.
âWhere were you two for the past hour?â Sirius asks with a quirked brow.
I snort a laugh. âWouldnât you like to know?â
âI would, considering we saw you wander off into the forest,â he says, leaning forward on his arms with a smirk.
I roll my eyes. âNone of your business.â
âAlways so secretive,â Remus says, stabbing a few potatoes on his fork before looking between us.
I glance at James who laughs as soon as we make eye contact. Though, I also catch another pair of eyes when I turn towards him, and wince a little. Lily looks at me with her brows furrowed from a little ways down the table. I shrug at her, unsure why she looks upset with me. She rolls her eyes, going back to her conversation with Dorcas. I sigh.
âGreat. Now Lilyâs mad at me because you had to go and turn her down,â I say to James.
Peter laughs. âHe turned her down?â
âWhen did this happen?â Remus asks, looking much more curious now.
âYou need to learn how to shut it,â James says to me, his voice a little high as he shakes his head.
âThey wouldâve found out anyways,â I say, barely feeling sorry at all.
I hold back from chuckling as James is pelted with questions from the boys, focusing more on my food and trying to ignore the occasional sour glance I get from Lily.
Though, I couldnât escape her forever.
I walked into my room after a night of sitting around with the boys and Marlene in the common room. I thought I would be going to bed and falling asleep, but clearly it was wishful thinking. Lily stared at me from her bed as Marlene and I shut the door behind us.
I raised a brow. âHi?â
Marlene looked between us, excusing herself to take a shower. The traitor.
âWhat the hell?â Lily said, crossing her arms.
âYeah, what the hell? Why have you been giving me sour looks all day?â
She scoffed. âYou told me to tell him, and you know what he did? Oh. Wait, of course you know. Because of course he already told you. Because of courseââ
âOh my god, Lily,â I roll my eyes, going to sit on my bed next to hers. âIâm sorry that I was wrong about how heâd react, but I had no clue. I thought he still had a thing for you.â
She huffs a sigh. âI shouldâve known you were setting me up. What, do you like to see me embarrassed?â
âIf I did, I wouldâve gone along to watch it happen,â I say, annoyed at her attitude. âSorry I was wrong, but I didnât know. And you said you wanted to tell him, anyways.â
âYou donât seem to be that sorry considering you were back to hanging around him again all day.â
âHeâs my best friend, Lily. Iâm not going to ditch him because he didnât have feelings for you,â I say, shaking my head.
She stands up suddenly. âWell, maybe you should. Maybe if you werenât like⊠In love with him, youâd be a better friend to me.â
I stare at her in annoyance. âYou need to get a grip. I wouldnât have encouraged you to try telling him if I was âin loveâ with him. Weâre friends. Youâre being insane.â
âWell, clearly he at least has feelings for you!â
I furrow my brow. âExcuse me?â
âWhy else would he reject me?â
I laugh against my better judgement. âAre you serious? One boy doesnât like you, so it just has to be because heâs in love with someone else? Lily, I love you, but that is the most egotistical thing youâve ever said.â
âBut youâre not denying it.â
âJames isnât in love with me. Have you considered that he just doesnât like you anymore? It happens. People move on,â I say, sighing. âJust⊠Go to bed, Lily. This is a ridiculous and pointless argument.â
I lay back on my bed, closing my eyes while I wait to get into the bathroom. I hear Lily mutter something under her breath, but choose to ignore it. The more she got angry with me, the less I cared that she got her feelings hurt. I didnât want to be unsympathetic, but it was getting hard to be concerned when I was blamed for a boy not liking her. Obviously James didnât like me.
Obviously.
I think.
He did kiss me.
I open my eyes, staring at the ceiling for a moment. James didnât like me, did he? Heâd never shown interest in me before. That kiss probably just happened because he was confused. He wanted to forget about it, anyways, so clearly that had to mean he didnât mean it. And I didnât feel that way about him anyways, so it didnât matter.
Except, I did feel my heart pound a little differently when he looked at me before the kiss.
I didnât hate the way his lips felt.
Seeing him smile at me on the walk back did give me a few butterflies.
But, no. Thatâs nothing. Heâs my best friend, I wouldnât suddenly start feeling that way about him. I couldnât. Itâd be ridiculous.
Itâs not like Iâd spend the rest of the night thinking about him. Except that I did. A lot.
I woke up the next morning, feeling like I was going insane. Iâd never felt that way about him before. Of course, I always though he was attractive. How could anybody look at him and not think he was gorgeous? But there was never anything more besides friendship. So why could I not stop thinking about him?
My eyes feel heavy as I sit in my last class of the day, James trying repeatedly to mess with me throughout the class. With five minutes left, he leans in closer. Since when did he start smelling so good?
âHey,â he says quietly, drawing my attention. âWhatâs wrong? Youâre not getting mad at me.â
âJust tired, Jamie,â I shrug, staring at the notes on the chalkboard that I havenât copied down.
âThatâs a lie. I can tell.â
I sigh. âHave you ever⊠Has anyone ever told you something about yourself that you thought wasnât true, and then⊠And then you realize they might be right?â
He furrows his brows. âHow do you mean?â
âI donât know. Like, letâs say someone tells you that you like strawberries, when youâve never liked strawberries. But then you think about every time youâve had a strawberry, and you realize that you actually really did like strawberries. A lot more than you thought you did. Like⊠you realize strawberries are your favorite fruit.â
He stares with a confused look, tilting his head. He reaches up, pressing the back of his hand to my forehead.
âAre you feeling alright?â
I lean away from him, rolling my eyes. âCut it out.â
He smiles, nudging me slightly. âCanât say Iâve had that experience, no.â
I groan. âThis sucks.â
âWhy canât you just tell me what actually happened?â he asks. He pouts. âPlease?â
I smile at him, trying hard to be annoyed, but finding it difficult. God, Iâm in trouble.
âI just canât. Itâs⊠private.â
âYou never keep secrets from me.â
âI donât even know what secret Iâm keeping just yet,â I sigh, resting my chin in my hand. âI feel like Iâm going crazy.â
âAw,â he coos. âYou say that like you arenât already.â
I push him, laughing softly, though we both straighten up when the professor reprimands us. We give a quick apology, still smirking at each other the next time we catch one anotherâs eye.
The next days pass by in a blur as I come to terms with what Iâve been feeling. It doesnât help that I couldnât talk to anyone, especially since Lily was still mad at me. Now, though, I couldnât blame her as much. She somehow realized I was into him before I did.
âHey,â Remus says, coming up to me as I sit in the common room. âItâs late. Why are you still here?â
âWhy are you?â
He shrugs, sitting next to me. âCanât sleep. Moonâs coming in a couple days.â
I hum in acknowledgement. âGotcha.â
He settles into the couch, crossing his arms over his chest. He looks sideways at me as I stare into the fire.
âYou didnât answer my question.â
âCause I canât tell anybody.â
He scoffs. âThatâs ridiculous. Youâve been off for days. James keeps complaining about how youâre not spending time with him as much.â
I shake my head, not responding.
âYou need to talk to someone about this.â
âCanât.â
âBullshit.â
I look at him. âSeriously. I canât talk to Jamie about it, Lilyâs still mad at me, and Marls and Dorcas are too gossipy.â
âYou can talk to me,â he shrugs.
âYou wouldnât get it, though.â
âTry me.â
I let out a breath. âYou have to promise this stays a secret.â
He nods. âPromise.â
âOkay,â I say under my breath. âOkay. So, um, Lily got really mad at me the other day because of the wholeâŠ. Confession thing. And I didnât understand why, and she started accusing me of things, and obviously I disagreed⊠But then something she said kind of stuck with me.â
âSheâs just mad. Donât listen to her,â Remus says, shaking his head. âYou know how she gets when sheâs in one of those moods.â
âBut I think she was kind of right,â I sigh. âThatâs the problem. She thinks⊠She told me she thought I was into James. And not like friends, like really into him.â
Remusâs eyes widen a little. âAnd⊠are you?â
âIâve been thinking about it for the past week, and⊠I think I might be.â
âWhoa. I know we always tease you two for how close you are, but I never thought youâŠâ
âI know,â I groan, my face in my hands. âAnd I know I havenât been hanging out with him as much as usual because of it, but I donât know what to do. How do you tell your best friend that you suddenly realized youâre in love with him?â
He doesnât answer, just reaches over and gives me a hug. I accept it, sighing a little.
Our next week goes over just like that. I donât avoid James by any means, but I try not to always be alone with him. I do find more opportunities to talk with Remus about it all, though, and it helps. Just to have someone to listen to me as I complain about my feelings. I do the same for him when he has troubles, though mine seem silly in comparison. He always tells me not to compare, though.
Unfortunately, though, as much as those chats help me process my feelings, they donât help me get over those feelings at all. If anything, they only grow the more I think about James.
Itâs super annoying.
Even more annoying is Lilyâs smug look when I tell her about my feelings for James. I expected her to be mad at me, but she did something worse: she laughed at me.
âI knew it!â
âHow? I didnât know!â
âBecause you are so obvious,â she shakes her head.
I scoff. âIâm clearly not that obvious or else you wouldnât have told me you had a crush on him.â
âAlright. Fair enough,â she quirks a brow. âBut still.â
I roll my eyes, walking over to hug her.
âSorry about that. If I knew I had a crush on him I wouldnât have told you to go for him.â
âSorry back,â she says. âShouldnât have gotten mad at you that he told me no.â
âI agree,â I laugh.
She whacks me in the arm, laughing back.
I try to go about my life as usual over the next couple of weeks. Thereâs no sense in making myself miserable or drawing attention to my small shift in behavior. I find myself still doing most of the same things I always did. Just a bit more carefully.
I sit with the boys at dinner, laughing at their stupid jokes and the plans they have for pranks. I finish my food, pushing the plate away from me, and listening in on a conversation being had between Sirius, Remus, and Peter.
âYou know, those three plan on being out all night,â James says quietly, leaning close to me as he watches the three boys talk.
I raise a brow. âYeah? Doing what?â
âThey wanted to just be out of the castle for the night. Think Sirius and Remus are going to the shrieking shack, and Peter is sneaking out to go meet up with some other friends in Hogsmeade, I guess.â
âAnd you arenât running off?â
He shakes his head. âTold them Iâd stay behind. Thought me and you could have a sleepover. Like old times.â
I chuckle. âIt has been a while.â
âI think close to a year. Theyâre always in my space,â he says, feigning annoyance. âBut itâll just be us tonight, if you want.â
I push down whatever feeling rises in my chest at that and agree, despite my better judgement.
He pulls me into his room that night, immediately going to the foot of his bed, looking at me like heâs about to change my life.
âI brought something a little⊠fun,â he smiles, opening up his trunk to show me his secret stash of drinks. âThought we might finally crack it open.â
I laugh. âAnd you didnât think to tell me sooner?â
âHey, weâve had plenty at the Gryffindor events,â he smiles. âThis is just for us. Our secret.â
âYouâre ridiculous.â
âIâm the greatest.â
We find ourselves on his floor after a few drinks, feeling fuzzy and happy. We talk about nothing for hours, occasionally passing a bottle between us.
âMaybe we should do this more often,â he says, smiling up at the ceiling. âI miss spending time with you like this.â
âWeâre always together.â
âYou spend a lot of time with Moony lately. Not fair, I want you all to myself,â he chuckles, poking my side.
I laugh, poking him back. âIâm still all yours. Love Moony so much, but youâre still my favorite I think. Now, if Sirius decided to start hanging around me more, then youâd be in trouble.â
He giggles, his cheeks rosy. I watch him carefully, feeling warm in the face myself, but for a different reason.
âYou have a really cute laugh,â I say before I can think about it.
He looks at me with a smile, his tongue poking out between his teeth. âYeah?â
âYeah,â I nod.
âYouâve never told me that before.â
I shrug. âI shouldâve.â
He stares back at me for a moment, giving me a little silly smile. He leans over me, propping himself up with his forehead next to my head. He leans down, much like he did that day we went swimming. But this time I kiss him back. My hand finds his cheek, holding him gently as I let him work his lips against mine. I canât deny the warmth that spreads over me or the butterflies I feel this time.
This time it lasts for a few minutes, neither of us bothering to pull away. Whether thatâs because he actually likes it or because weâre both drunk and donât know any better, I donât know. I also donât care.
He finally pulls away after a little while, still giving me that smile as if he didnât just take all the air in my lungs away from me.
âWe can pretend that one didnât happen, either,â he says, voice barely above a whisper.
I nod, unsure what to say. I donât want to pretend it didnât happen, but I couldnât tell him that without outing myself. I settle for the way his hand mindlessly reaches for mine as we go back into conversation like nothing ever interrupted us in the first place. Eventually, we move to his bed, preferring the softness of the mattress and pillows over the hard ground.
âCan I ask why youâve been spending all your time with Remus?â he asks during a lull in the conversation, playing with my fingers as he does.
âJust became better friends recently, I guess,â I say, glancing at him. I admire his face for a moment before snapping out of it. âSome stuff I can talk to him about that I havenât been able to tell anyone else. Itâs been nice to have someone to listen.â
âI could do that for you. You didnât have to go to him.â
âNot this time, Jamie. Itâs⊠different.â
âHow?â
âIt just is,â I sigh. âIâve had too much to drink for us to be having this conversation, James.â
He whines. âPlease? I just want to know.â
âNo. Maybe Iâll tell you someday, but not now.â
He grumbles, turning over and resting his head on my chest. His arm rests over my stomach. I just hope and pray he doesnât feel how hard my heart starts beating when he does.
âPlay with my hair?â he asks, his voice a little muffled.
âOkay,â I reply softly, running my fingers through his messy hair. âThis okay?â
He nods a little. âMhm. Thanks.â
We donât wake up until the next morning, still stuck in that same position.
I find myself with Remus again the following night. I sit on a chair, and he lounges on the couch, trying not to judge me for putting myself in that situation. I donât tell him about the kiss, but he hears about everything else.
âYou canât keep doing this to yourself,â he says after a beat of silence when I finish explaining. âYou either need to tell him, or put some distance between you.â
âI tried that today.â
âI know,â he rolls his eyes. âItâs all James could talk about. Complaining the whole day that you werenât eating with us or not going to the library when we were.â
âSee? I feel like nothing I do is right in this situation,â I say, feeling defeated. âLike, how am I supposed to keep spending time with him like everythingâs normal when Iâm practically floating every time he so much as looks at me. Itâs pathetic. And I canât just ignore him, cause then he goes and bugs you all.â
âMaybe you just need toââ
âHey,â Jamesâs voice calls from behind us.
I look at him, noticing the annoyed look on his face. It doesnât seem like heâs overheard us, but I canât tell why he looks so irritated. Usually heâd be annoyed if I didnât bother with them all day, but he looks⊠mad. I quirk a brow.
âHey,â I say, confused.
He doesnât reply, looking a little upset and a little lost. I turn back to Remus after a moment of silence, our conversation effectively being cut short. I stand up quickly.
âIâll see you tomorrow,â I say to Remus, starting to walk past James in order to get to my room.
âWhatâs going on?â James asks, grabbing my upper arm.
I turn around quickly. âWhat?â
He clenches his jaw, then looks at Remus. âMoony, we need a minute.â
Remus goes to argue, but drops it quickly when he sees James looking more serious than he ever has. He gets up, giving me a sympathetic look before he heads towards the boysâ dorms. I glare at James as he hasnât let go of my arm yet.
âWhy did you do that?â
âWhy are you with him again?â
I scoff. âYou mean our friend? Did you ever think maybe we were talking?â
âThatâs the problem,â he says, dropping my arm.
âHow is that a problem? Iâm going through something and heâs just trying to helpââ
He sighs harshly, looking around like heâs lost. He looks back at me with his brows furrowed.
âI donât get it,â he says, practically whining. âYou never keep things from me, and now youâre telling Moony all of your secrets and ditching me for him and⊠And I donât understand it. Weâre supposed to be best friends.â
âWe are, Jamie, thereâs just some things that I canâtââ
âWhy not?â he swallows, tears starting to prick his eyes. âWhy canât you tell me? You never do this. We tell each other everything.â
I freeze for a moment, my mouth drying up as I look at him. I want to reach out for him and hold him and make him feel better. But I also want answers, because itâs his fault that everything got screwed up. He didnât have to reject Lily. He didnât have to kiss me when we were swimming. He didnât have to do it again on his bedroom floor. He didnât have to treat me like I was the most important person in his life.
âThen tell me why you kissed me,â I blurt out.
He shakes his head a little. âI donât know.â
âThen figure it out! You donât just get to kiss me and then act like you just did it for no reason.â
His chest heaved from his breathing, staring at me. His cheeks tinged pink again as he took a moment.
âIâI just wanted to. I donât know. You were there and you were looking at me like that and you justâŠâ he huffed a sigh. âI just wanted to kiss you.â
âWhy?â I asked, frustrated.
âBecause,â he said back, his tone matching mine. âBecause I always want to kiss you and I slipped up and did it one timeââ
âYou did it twice!â
âOkay! Two times,â he exclaims. âWe promised we would just forget about it.â
âAnd what exactly is that even supposed to mean?â
âYouâre so fucking oblivious,â he grumbles, rolling his eyes. âGod, what do I have to do to make you understand that Iâmââ
I wait as he stops talking. âThat youâre what?â
âIâm in love with you. I have been forever, and youâve never cared,â he says, letting out a shuddering breath. âAnd now youâre spending all of your time with Remus. And itâs so embarrassing that Iâm sat here hopelessly in love with my best friend of over ten years while sheâs running around with another one of our friends.â
âRunning around with him? We sit in the common room and talk because youâre fucking infuriating!â
âOh, so youâre gossiping about me?â he asks, voice raising as mine does once again.
âNot gossiping, justââ
âJust what?â
âIâm in love with you, too, you fucking tosser!â
He looks angry for a few moments, then it switches to confusion, then shock, and possibly the five stages of grief before he finally lands on raised brows and an open mouth.
âYou what?â he exclaims.
âYouâre so annoying,â I say, groaning. âYeah, Lily had to go and tell me I was in love with you, and she always has to be fucking right about everything, doesnât she?â
âAre you listening to yourself right now?â he asks incredulously, furrowing his brows. âYou just told me you loved me.â
âIâm aware, James,â I say, crossing my arms.
âWell⊠Did you mean it?â
âObviously,â I say, shaking my head at him like it was a dumb question.
âYouâre so dumb,â he says under his breath.
Before I can say anything else, heâs moving forward, his hands on my cheeks as he crashes his lips into mine. I melt into him, this kiss being way more passionate than the one we shared the night before. I hold onto his waist, letting him deepen the kiss, though it only lasts for a minute or two after that.
He pulls away. âYouâre infuriating. Why didnât you tell me before?â
âYou didnât tell me anything, either!â
âI kissed you twice!â
I roll my eyes. âThat doesnât count. You said we should forget about both times.â
âOnly cause I thought thatâs what youâd want,â he defends, making an annoyed face.
I try to be angry, but itâs a difficult task. I reach up, running a thumb over his furrowed eyebrows.
âSo grumpy,â I mutter. âJust told you I was in love with you. Youâd think youâd at least try to be happy.â
He scoffs a laugh, pulling me into a hug, his face buried in my neck.
âIâve never been happier.â
We hear footsteps coming down a few moments later.
âYou owe me ten galleons,â Siriusâs voice says.
I look over Jamesâs shoulder as he keeps holding onto me, not caring that our friends are right there.
âYou were betting on us?â I ask.
Sirius nods with a smirk. âAnd Peter just lost. He thought youâd take until the end of the year to get together. I said itâd be in this term.â
âI didnât bet,â Remus says from behind Sirius, holding his hands up in surrender with a small smile. âGlad you worked it out, though.â
I smile at them, shaking my head and turning my attention back on James again. He looks at me finally.
âIâm glad, too,â he says quietly. âThink I mightâve combusted if I had to keep pretending I didnât want you like that.â
âDidnât do a great job at covering for it, though. Still kissed me twice.â
âYou say like you didnât love it,â he smirks with a wink.
ââââ-> SMUT STARTS HERE. 18+ <-ââââ
James finally pulls away, taking my hand in his.
âGood, now that youâre all out the room, if youâll excuse usâŠâ he says, pulling me past the boys who all groan in disgust.
I giggle as he practically runs to his room with my hand in his, kissing me the second the door is shut and locked. I smile into the kiss, my arms around his neck. He starts kissing my cheek and jaw after a few minutes.
âHope youâve been feeling the tension as much as I have, cause I could probably cum in my pants right now if you asked me to,â he says casually, as if it wouldnât send a wave of arousal down my body.
âOh myâŠâ I trail off as he bites at my neck softly. âAre we gonnaâŠ?â
He pauses, his eyes wide. âOh. I probably shouldâve asked before I assumed, huh?â
He winces a little at his own excitement, cheeks tinged pink.
âSorry.â
I smile softly. âThatâs okay. Iâ I want to, I just didnât know if thatâs what the plan was.â
He smiles again brightly, kissing me once more. He giggled against my lips, then starts backing me towards the bed.
âI really do love you. Kind of embarrassing, really. I think I have forever,â he says softly, laying me down on the mattress and crawling over me.
I let out a soft breath. âEmbarrassing for me, I think. I didnât even realize until someone else told me I did.â
He laughs again, starting to kiss down my neck.
âI kind of always wanted you to be my first time, to be honest,â he says against my skin.
I pause, realizing whatâs really happening. âOh. Oh my god.â
âWhat?â he asks, leaning up to start unbuttoning my shirt.
âWait, have you never⊠You havenât done this either, have you?â
âNot all the way,â he shakes his head, then looks at me with wide eyes. âIs that okay?â
âThatâs okay. I havenât either. Just⊠You know. Iâve done some hand stuff but that was it.â
He looks at me again, then starts laughing a little. I find myself laughing right back as reality sets in for both of us.
âWeâre gonna take each others virginity,â I say, still laughing a little. âOh my god.â
He snorts a laugh. âDidnât wake up this morning thinking this would happen, thatâs for certain.â
I smile. âI love you.â
âI love you more,â he teases, dropping a kiss on the tip of my nose.
I watch as he finishes taking off my shirt, getting up just enough to help him pull it and my camisole off completely. He sits back on his knees, staring at me for a moment.
âYou alright, Jamie?â
He nods. âDoing great, love.â
He starts taking off his own shirt, then. As many times as Iâd seen his arms and chest, youâd think I wouldnât still feel amazed seeing him in just his trousers⊠But I couldnât stop staring, either. He leaned back in, kissing me again. I let my hands run over his arms and back, having free reign to do so and enjoying it. He nipped at my lip, a little noise leaving me and making him smile against my lips. I do the same to him, both of us ending up grinning at each other again.
âThis is nice,â I say quietly. âDoing this with you, itâs nice. I like that we donât feel like we have to act⊠sexy.â
âWell, that because itâs never an act for me, love,â he winks with a smirk.
I pull him back down with a giggle, though the smile is wiped from my face when he rolls his hips into mine. Feeling him hard for me for the first time leaves me a little breathless, especially when heâs grinding into me. I small groan leaves me when he does it again.
âLike it when you do that,â he says into my ear, doing it again just to get another reaction out of me. âI like those little sounds you make. So pretty.â
I find myself breathing heavily, my hands squeezing between our bodies to start unbuckling his belt. He gets the hint and sits up, pulling it off himself.
âGet out of those, yeah?â he says, nodding at my bottoms as he works himself out of his.
I comply immediately, shimmying out of my trousers and tossing them onto the ground. He gets back on top of me as soon as weâre both one layers closer to what we really want. I let my hand slide into his underwear as he stars kissing at my neck again, letting out a shuddering breath when I finally feel him. He whimpers into my neck as I start stroking him, rutting his hips into my hand.
âFeel so good, love,â he says, voice whiny and desperate.
I groan back, especially as one of his hands slides under the band of my panties to slip a finger into me. I feel myself growing hotter, kissing him and swallowing the moans he lets out as my hand keeps working him over.
âShit, Jamie,â I moan as he adds a second finger.
âGood for you?â he breathes out.
âYes,â I say breathlessly. âYes. Very.â
I whine as he gets me closer to the edge, his hips doing all the work as my hand stopped moving up and down his length. He adds pressure to my clit with his thumb, sending me careening over the edge with praises and his name on my lips.
He pulls his hand away from me suddenly.
âCanât wait any longer, love,â he says, voice wrecked.
He slides my panties off my legs as I take my bra off. Then, I watch with wide eyes as he pulls his underwear off, his cock bigger than I was expecting by far. I knew he felt big, but seeing him was entirely different.
âFuck,â I say, staring at him. âDonât know if I can take that, Jamie.â
âYeah, you can, love,â he nods, settling between my legs and kissing me softly. âYou can take it, baby.â
He pushes himself up just enough for both of us to see him rubbing his head through my slick before prodding at my entrance. He starts pushing in slowly. I let out a loud groan, my eyes shutting.
âShh, just relax, love,â he says, lips hovering over mine. âYouâre doing so good. Taking it so well, baby.â
He whimpers against my lips as he keeps pushing in slowly.
âSo big, Jamie,â I moan, watching him disappear inside of me.
âI know, baby,â he says, a few more little noises spilling from his mouth. âI know, but youâre being so good. My good girl.â
He bottoms out, both of us panting and holding onto each other as I adjust to the new feeling. It hurts a little, but not in a bad way. Especially when he starts moving. That bit of pain makes way for a lot of pleasure once he starts rocking into me at a steady pace, whining and moaning into my ear.
âSâgood, Jamie. You feel so good,â I say, trying to catch my breath.
âSo good for me, baby. Squeezing me nice,â he whines, pinning me down under the weight of his body. âGood girl. So proud of you taking me so well.â
âGonna cum again,â I say, feeling it building in my stomach again.
âMe too, baby. Just a little more,â he says, pressing his face into my neck again. âDonât want to be done so soon, but you feel so perfect. Youâre so good for me.â
I moan at his ramblings of praise, his words only causing me to get closer to that peak again. I hold onto him tightly, my body wrapped around his as he fucks into me like weâd done it a million times before. I speak his name over and over and over again as I crash down, my eyes rolling back from the intensity of the orgasm, and the fact that he doesnât stop fucking me through it.
Though, near the end of my peak, he moans out a hundred more praises, my name falling from his lips as I feel him fill me up with his cum. He whimpers again against my skin as he finishes, not stopping the movement of his hips until heâs visibility overstimulated.
We breathe heavily, holding onto one another tightly as we come down from our highs, his hair sticking to his forehead as he leans in to kiss me softly again.
âHoly shit,â he whispers. âYouâre perfect.â
I breathe out, a small smile on my face. âYou⊠Yeah. Oh my god. I thought the first time was supposed to be bad.â
âIt was perfect for me. But I barely lasted, it couldnât have been that great for you,â he says, looking a little disappointed that he might not have done a good job for me.
I shake my head. âYou still made me come harder than I ever have. You were incredible, Jamie. I mean it.â
He smiles softly. âIâm gonna have to kick them out of here more often. I might be addicted now.â
âAnd we have more things to try,â I add. âCanât let this happen only once a week or something. Too much to figure out, I think.â
He giggles again. âLike what?â
âIâd really like you in my mouth next time.â
His smile drops. He starts nodding quickly. âYes. Yeah, Iâll kick them out at two in the morning if you ask. Whatever you want.â
I laugh, pulling him into another kiss.
âNow, we have to figure out that contraceptive spell, or else we might be in some trouble,â I say with a smile.
âSorry about that,â he smirks, clearly not sorry. âIâm sure Sirius knows it.â
âPlease. As if he isnât fucking Remus whenever those two run off to the shrieking shack.â
Jamesâs eyes widen. âWhat?â
I snort a laugh.
âAnd you called me the oblivious one.â
#james potter#james potter x fem!reader#james potter x you#james potter x reader#james potter fluff#james potter smut#james potter fic#james potter fanfiction#best friend!james#bsf!james potter#marauders smut#marauders fluff#marauders fanfiction#marauders fic#marauders x reader#marauders#luna still hates jk#lunaâs james fics
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Battered by Baggage
poly!marauders x whimsical!reader who the boys cannot find [1k words]
prompt by @atlass8: "Reader has a suitcase like Newt Scamander and she probably busy doing something in there but our boys don't know about it and can't find her. barty being our bestie he knows where reader is but doesn't tell anyone cause he likes chaos. tho their reaction to the suitcase would be amazing" -> scenario by @unstablereader
CW: Crouch Sr reference but it's chill, fem!reader
âShe may have gotten lost, Pads.â Remus placated without raising his gaze from his book, though heâd be lying if he said he hadnât been staring at the same two passages as he fretted over your whereabouts as well.
âHow could she be lost, Moony? Weâre on a train, it has only two directions.â Sirius pressed.
âShe is always wandering offâŠâ James considered as he peered out the window, though he didnât seem particularly confident in his statement.Â
âWe always sit in this compartment.â Sirius insisted. âShe knows that, everyone knows that. Sheâs supposed to meet us here.â
âAnd she will, bubs.â James offered him, pulling the long-haired boy into his side and pressing his nose into his jaw. âShe keeps her promises.â
Remus hardly had a moment to smile at his boyfriends when the compartment door was flung open unceremoniously.Â
The three boys deflated significantly when the head that was poking into their train compartment was not that of their sweet albeit perhaps more than slightly whimsical girlfriend, but that of her very much maniacal best friend.Â
âNot one looker in the bunch.â Barty scoffed with a shake of his head.Â
âYeah, well the average of this compartment will greatly improve once you sod off.â Sirius muttered rather petulantly as he crossed his arms, taking a moment to remind himself how upset you would be if you found out he had hexed your friend.Â
âWhatever.â Barty sighed as if he was really quite bored of this conversation that he had started. âTell Treasure weâre looking for her.â
âYeah, thatâll be the first thing we say when we find her Junior.â Sirius scoffed sarcastically, earning him a very bemused expression from Barty before his eyes flit up to the overhead luggage.Â
âMerlin, you really wouldnât know what's right above you, would you?â He sighed in exasperation then, closing the door before anyone could respond and stalking off down the train.Â
âHeâs a weird bloke.â James let out with a breath, relaxing somewhat into his seat now that the unwelcome company had vacated.
âWhat did he mean that we wouldnât know whatâs sitting right above us?â Remus murmured to himself just as the train veered a corner and a few bags fell from the overhead compartment; one landing on Siriusâ head before landing on the ground with a thud.Â
âWhose bag is that?â James asked as he craned his neck to peer at it over Sirius.
âItâs gonna go out the bloody window.â Sirius muttered as glared at the offending bag and massaged his head.Â
Before Sirius could act on his revenge, the bag began to wiggle and shift before you came tiptoeing out of it with a yawn.
âThere you boys are!â you greeted excitedly as if they hadnât just spent the last however long worried you had missed the bloody train to Hogwarts.
âThere we are!? What- what the hells?â Sirius sputtered.Â
You seemed rather confused at Siriusâ theatrics and turned to look at Remus quizzically.Â
âWeâve been looking for you, baby dove.â he murmured as he pulled you down so you were tucked into his side on the bench beside him.Â
âOh,â you giggled, âwell I wasnât very far, Siri; I was only taking a nap.âÂ
The three boys stared at you; Remus who had decided long ago to stop trying to understand you and just appreciate your antics, James who looked like he was trying to decide between being elated at finally having you here and scolding you for worrying him so, and Sirius who was still clearly very caught up on the whole matter.Â
âA nap?â Sirius deadpanned.
âRight.â
âIn a bag.â
âMhm.â You hummed happily; smile beaming as you leaned further into Remusâ side. Merlin, he loved you.Â
James let out a nervous chuckle as he placed a reassuring hand on Siriusâ shoulder. âSweetheart, Iâm afraid weâre going to need more details.â
âDumbledore said I was allowed to keep the nifflers but they werenât allowed to roam the school; I guess they had stolen from Slughorn a few too many times.â You explained easily.
âYou have nifflers?â Remus asked you then, to which he was rewarded with you smiling shyly up at him.Â
âWell, they were Bartyâs first; his father is involved with poaching and trading beasts and creatures, so Barty stole them from him and brought them to school.â
âAnd Junior justâŠreleased them on the grounds?â Sirius asked.
âNo.â
âNo?â
âNo.â You repeated.
The three boys waited for you to explain more, but when it became clear that you werenât going to, Remus gave you a nudge.
âWhere did Junior release them?â He asked you sweetly.Â
âGryffindor tower.â
âThat son of a bitch.â Sirius muttered as he no doubt started considering the amount of accessories he had lost last term.Â
âSo, let me get this straight.â James started as he reached over and took your hand in his. âCrouch Senior poached and was trying to trade a pack of nifflers.â He paused for you to nod. âSo Junior stole them.â Another nod. âAnd brought them to school where they wreaked havoc and then Dumbledore moved to ban them from school property.â
âRight.â You agreed happily, squeezing Jamesâ hand in yours in praise of his correct deduction.
Remus watched as James melted slightly in his quasi-interrogation in order to smile at you before the bag vibrated again.Â
âAnd now they all justâŠlive in here?â He asked as he brought the bag over and pulled the two sides apart slightly in an attempt to peer inside.
âIâd be careful Jamie; Siriusâ earrings look quite expensive.â You suggested breezily, smiling at Sirius as if you hadnât just sort of threatened his belongings.
He couldnât be mad at you, though; not for his stress over your whereabouts, not for your slightly rude entrance, and certainly not for your caring nature which resulted in you toting around a bag of pilfering thieves.
And he certainly couldnât be mad at you when you looked so sodding sweet pressed up against Remusâ side as if that was simply where you were meant to be.Â
And he definitely wouldnât be mad if he could convince you to take care of the growing lump on his head as a ruse to get to cuddle you all by himself tonight.
Nope, Sirius really couldnât find it in him to be mad at all.
#marauders era#marauders au#marauders fanfiction#reader insert#self insert#remus lupin#james potter#sirius black#wolfstarbucks#poly!wolfstarbucks#poly!marauders#poly!marauders x reader#poly!marauders x you#poly!marauders fluff#poly!marauders imagine#poly!marauders fic#poly!marauders blurb#poly!marauders ficlet#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#james potter x reader#james potter x you#sirius black x reader#sirius black x you#whimsical!reader#best friend!barty#ellecdc fics
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