#fic is sad and angsty what else is new

[jamminvroomvroom]

congrats on 5k queen! you’re writing is so brilliant beyond belief and you deserve all the love and support this site has to offer. can i request lando+angsty smut (the best combo)…prompts along the lines of “i don’t think im ever going to love anyone the way i love you”//“i don’t think i want to love anyone else”

how did it end?

ln x famous fem!reader

in which it ends, until…

i love this fic with my whole heart. thank u sm for this request, anon, and for being so absolutely for gorgeous and kind <3 kicking off the 5k celebration with a big, sad, sexy bang! lemme know what you think, hugs n kisses

songs to set the mood: how did it end? by taylor swift

warnings: 18+!! minors dni!! smut, angst angst angst, fluff, happy ending! exes to lovers, just. a lot going on. sad!lando, sad!everyone, so many feels, r is a big deal model, alcohol consumption, mentions of smoking

4.1k words

one gasp, and then…

“how did it end?” the woman strokes your arm, soothing, tentative.

you don’t know her all that well, she’s signed to the same agency as you, you see her in the halls sometimes and sit next to her in makeup chairs.

you stare blankly at her, registering. news travels fast apparently.

you smile, small, fake, tilting your head to the side. you mumble something about different schedules, timezones, right person, wrong time. she watches your face intently, with sympathy. you want to throttle her. she’s being kind and you despise her for it right now.

“i won’t tell anyone.” she affirms, her fingers still smoothing over the skin of your arm.

yes you will, you think. all of her friends, the rest of the building will know exactly what you’ve told her by the time you get to your meeting. you don’t begrudge her, though, that’s the nature of the industry.

“well, it was good to see you.” you nod, even go in for a quick hug, and then you speed away, beelining for the elevator. the ride is short, your managers office somewhere on the third floor and you shuffle down the corridor, ready to be informed of what your life will look like for the next three months.

fittings, shoots, paris trip.

mhm.

swimwear season, charlotte tilbury, meeting with the vogue journalist.

cool.

week off, few days in london, monaco grand prix.

no.

“what? no.” you splutter. out of habit, you reach for a necklace, frown when you realise it’s no longer there.

“what do you mean, no?” she narrows her eyes at you.

“i can’t go to the race. no.”

“girl, i love you, but did i ask?”

“you know i can’t-“

“you won’t have to see him.” she reasons.

“but what if i do? he’s obviously gonna be there, and the events before and after- no. no.”

“lando norris is not gonna be the end of you.”

you stifle a laugh, one that sounds more like a strangled cry.

what if he already was?

-

look who we ran into at the shops,

walking in circles like he was lost

lando stares at the shampoo.

specifically, the one you use. used. he can’t be too sure anymore, he supposes.

he’d popped out for a loaf of bread, about an hour ago. he didn’t want to acknowledge how long he’d been staring at the women’s toiletries section.

you seemed to live on, everywhere. lando could see you in his apartment, the passenger seat of his car, the back of the garage. even the fucking supermarket wasn’t safe. you were very much alive, moving on with life, and yet you haunted him like he’d killed you himself.

perhaps he had, in a way.

the basket grazes the outside of his leg.

that’s the shower gel he’d buy for you, the one you only used when you stayed with him in monaco.

there’s the tampons you asked him to buy, crying back at home on your- his bed.

oh, and there’s the shampoo that you made him buy, the one that you told him made his curls feel extra fluffy when he was between your legs-

“lando?” a voice calls, drawing lando out of the mist.

“oh, alex. hey.” lando croaks. he hasn’t noticed the lump in his throat until now. he clears his throat, running a hand through his hair.

“what you doing, mate?” alex asks, eyebrows furrowed. he scans lando’s face, puffy eyes, watery.

“shopping.”

“for women’s shampoo?”

“no, no, just… looking.” lando stutters.

“when was the last time you slept?” alex’s voice is laced with concern, apprehensive. he doesn’t know what to say to his heartbroken friend.

lando smiles weakly.

“i’ve been sleeping.”

alex sighs.

“okay, when was the last time you slept properly, then?”

lando’s shoulders visibly sag.

“about a month ago.”

-

we hereby conduct this post-mortem

“we can’t do this anymore.”

the words fall from your lips in a whisper, but they reach him like you’ve screamed them at him. he sits opposite you, in the arm chair, so far away, only a metre or so.

“i know.” lando breathes shakily.

“i don’t want this but…”

“yeah.”

it’s been such a good year. you’re in love. it’s not enough. there’s too much distance, too many outsider opinions, too much longing for someone who’s on the other side of the world.

he’ll be in london. you’ll be in brazil.

he’ll be in australia. you’ll be in amsterdam.

it’s too much.

“i love you, though.” you remind him meekly.

“don’t know how to not love you.” he sniffles.

your heart shatters, the pieces flying over the room, spilling across the floor. they mix with the splinters of his, painting the room red. all you feel is blue.

you cry in his arms when he takes you to bed, his own tears spilling over your collar bone when he buries his head in your neck, licks over the marks he’s left there. to remember me by, he’d muttered dryly.

when you’re both finished, he lays there for a moment, still on top of you. damp with sweat and tears, the taste of one another still lingering on your tongues.

“how is it possible that i miss you already?” he pants, lips grazing just below your ear.

“i get it, lan. i’ve been missing you for a while.”

you’re gone when he wakes up.

and so, a touch that was my birthright became foreign

-

come one, come all

it’s happening again

the empathetic hunger descends

there are about six cameras pointed at you when he asks the dreaded question.

you’re in new york, sat on a talk show hosts sofa, lit by stage lights and his inquisitive eyes. two hundred people sit in the audience, on the edge of their seats waiting for you to spill your secrets.

“so, what happened there, with lando?”

you plaster on the fakest smile to date, crossing your legs anxiously.

“we’re both just so busy, you know? he’s doing amazing things in f1 and i’m all over the place with work.”

“we love both of you over here, it was sad to hear.” he sympathises, adjusting his tie and leaning back in his chair. his fingers drum over the wood of his desk, waiting for more.

vultures. everyone is a vulture.

“and we still have a lot of love for each other. he’s a wonderful person.”

there are tears in your eyes and bile rising rapidly in your throat when you shake hands with the crew, the host, and retreat to your dressing room. you stumble into the en-suite and throw up. then, you fall onto the sofa and cry. you fix your makeup at godspeed and reply to the text from your team, inviting you to drinks at some rooftop bar, promising to meet them there. you punctuate the text with one too many exclamation marks, feigning excitement.

“we still have a lot of love for each other.”

translation: i can’t understand: how did it end?

-

lando watches your interview. of course he does. he watches everything that you do, watches the way you set the world on fire.

he can’t help himself where you’re concerned, like an addict craving the next hit. you look so pretty on tv, glowing. you look fine.

god, why do you look fine?

he hates himself for hating just how fine you look. he is not fine.

“he’s a wonderful person.”

your words ring in his ears. they anger him, because if he’s oh-so-wonderful, why aren’t you here? why isn’t he there with you, waiting backstage? why can’t you just hate him? why can’t he just hate you? maybe you will, if he shows you just how not wonderful he can be.

he gets drunk that night. forces max to hit the clubs with him. sticks his tongue down a pliant woman’s throat. doesn’t ask her name. let’s her invite him back to her place. it has to be her place, he can’t fuck someone else in your bed, the one you used to share. he leaves minutes after he’s pulled out. he’s sure she’s lovely, too good for him and his bitter fucking heart. he feels utterly disgusting.

lando goes home, scrubs his skin red, and then does it again. he doesn’t go to sleep, watches from his balcony as the sun begins to rise over the sea. he hikes to the highest point he can reach in monaco, where it’s quiet and there’s no one to judge him, or worse, sympathise with him.

he stands at the edge of the cliff. screams once, twice. he sits on a rock, and lets himself cry.

the deflation of our dreaming

leaving me bereft and reeling

my beloved ghost and me

sitting in a tree

d-y-i-n-g

-

your stylist is plying you with options.

you can wear the denim with the cream OR you could do the red and white? or we can go full glam! or! or! or! we could-

you drown her out. you don’t give a fuck. not a single one.

what you wear to the monaco grand prix is quite literally the least of the your problems. your biggest problem, of course, is that you have to go to the fucking thing.

visibility is important, get people talking! the words of your manager ring in your ears until you have a dull migraine brewing behind your ears.

you leave the fitting not entirely sure what you’re wearing, but your stylist will be sending the clothes over so you can pack.

when you land in all too familiar nice, there are cameras. when you get to the hotel in monaco, you and lando are already trending on twitter. well, at least he knows you’re coming. when you’re getting your makeup done before your first event, you get a text.

i’ll try and keep my distance.

try.

try is such an interesting word. the fact that he has to try to stay away makes your belly flutter with embarrassing, self loathing butterflies. don’t try too hard, you want to respond. you don’t.

should’ve told you i’d be here you shoot back.

you think i didn’t already know?

of course he knew. he’d probably asked god knows how many brands to invite you. you try and feign an illness but your team drag you kicking and screaming to the event.

-

there are no two ways about it: you’re drunk, on a tuesday night, somewhere in the principality. a few cocktails with a jewellery brand turned into a night on the town, bar hopping with people you hardly knew and barely recognised.

you’re shaking your ass in jimmy’z, pretending to have fun when you see him.

lando stands at the bar, watching you, jaw tensed, eyes solemn. you exit the club faster that his car down a back straight, stumbling into the smoking area. you bum a cigarette from a guy who tries really hard to convince you that he’s the son of a british lord, and sink into the corner, ignoring the people recording you.

depressed model shame smokes outside monaco club because she is fucking pathetic, the headlines will read.

“thought you quit that shit.” his voice washes over your body like you’ve been set on fire, smooth tone, ambiguous accent making you ache.

“i did but then i got forced to come to monaco, so.” you shrug.

“forced?”

“‘m here for work.” you sigh.

“i guess i am too.” he mumbles. you raise an eyebrow.

“you live here, lan.” you tease. lan rolls off of your tongue too sweetly.

“doesn’t feel like it anymore.”

how can it, without you? he wants to scream at you. he can’t, you don’t deserve it.

“how are you?”

you want to touch him.

“shit.”

he needs a taste.

“yeah.”

you put your cigarette out. it tastes like shit, half smoked.

you stand there, stare at each other.

take me home, you want to beg.

come home, he clenches his fists, trying not to grab you and remind you how you’ll always be his, right here, up against the side of the club.

“good luck, if i don’t see you.” you whisper. you linger, praying that he’ll beg you to stay so that you can crumble into his arms, without having to make the first move.

lando ponders his options. his head and his heart wage a war.

logic wins, unfortunately.

“thank you.”

you take that as your queue to get the fuck out of there, and disappear into the night.

-

it’s raining on sunday. the dreary weather seems to perfectly sum up what has been the worst week of your life.

you’ve seen your ex boyfriend more times than you can count, ended up with about four hangovers as a result, and with a pounding head, you have to sit in the paddock club and wait for the sound of engines to split your head in half. it was your own doing, so you’d suck it up, recognising that you were a disgustingly privileged bitch, and there are people who would sell their kidneys to do what you’re complaining about.

you never complain, not usually. but your heart hurts and your body hearts and your mind hurts and it’s just not fair. lando is gorgeous, and you miss him so badly, and your shoes are digging in. who the fuck thinks it’s a good idea to wear heels to an f1 race?

you see him before the race, mouth good luck from afar. he winks. it’s something you used to do before every race. old habits die screaming.

the rain falls harder, the track slick. you say a prayer and take your seat.

“norris has this in the bag, he’s bloody good in the wet.” you hear some old guy say behind you. you are cursed with the knowledge of just how good in the wet he is, and you end up flushed.

he wins. his second one in three races. you pray that no one notices the way you weep. everyone notices.

you make a mistake and rush for the podium, your pass giving you access. he graces the top step and you sob, grinning like a fool, soaked through with rain. the anthem plays, the champagne pops. he finds your eyes in the crowd. your hair falls, stringy and curled, mascara smudged. you are the most breathtaking sight. he stands still, washed with an onslaught of champagne, watching you like he’s scared to take his eyes off of you. his boyish grin and hopeful eyes render you weak - you’re there for him, after all - and he can’t help but bask in that little fact.

dangerous territory. you break, and disappear.

-

say it once again with feeling…

the photographers barely get a second to snap a picture of the top three, because lando is gone. he takes the stairs two at a time, descending from the podium and throwing his pirelli cap and a shaky apology at his pr rep. the adrenaline spike makes his blood rush; he needs to find you and stop you and tell you that he will never be able to stop loving you.

the exit is the natural assumption, and he nearly slips a thousand times as he sprints through the paddock. the ground is wet, but he figures that if his car made it, so can he. the gates are in sight, and so are you, your clothes sticking to your shivering frame.

he calls your name, thunderously travelling towards you, his voice hitting your ears like a sonic boom. you freeze, turn slowly until your facing him. the rain splashes around you, not letting up.

you’re within his reach, and he pulls you in, hugging you tight. you melt into him, clinging like he’s a life force. he inhales you, your scent that he’s missed so horrifically. you crumble, and so does he, pieced back together as one.

“i can’t do this, i can’t.” he kisses the words into the cold skin of your neck.

“no, neither can i.” you choke wetly with emotion.

“miss you too much. it’s too hard, it’s stupid, it’s-“

“wrong. it’s wrong. ‘m sorry.” your breath fans his face, breathing life into him, life that he’d lost four months ago.

he grabs your shoulders, lowering so that his eyes are level with yours. his curls fall over his eyes, sodden from the rain.

“i don’t think, no, i know: i’m never gonna love anyone the way i love you.” lando speaks slow, convincing. your chest is tight.

“i don’t want to love anyone else.” you croak, the lump in your throat making it hard to breathe.

“come back to me.” he mutters, pleading.

“don’t think i ever left.” you breathe, hushed.

your lips slot over his easily, it’s like breathing. the kiss is messy, helpless, and he engulfs you whole, his body wrapping around yours like a blanket. you latch onto his race-suit, drawing him in, and then you both seem to remember where you are.

lando norris caught kissing ex like horny teenager in monaco paddock!

you pull away with breathless chuckle. the air is fresh, and you feel alive. he steals another peck.

“wait for me at home. i’ll be quick.” his hand finds you ass, just for a second and you scold him playfully.

home.

yeah, home.

“don’t make me wait.” you grin.

his brain short circuits.

“do you still have your key?” he splutters, refocusing.

you scoff. “never took it off the chain.”

-

you pace the apartment, taking in the space. it hasn’t changed, but it’s messier, a visual representation of lando since you left. the pit of your belly swirls with anxiety, anticipation. he’ll be back soon, and he’ll kiss you, make love to you, remind you that you’re home and that it’d be stupid to leave again.

you’re still damp from the rain, shedding layers until you’re left in your vest and jeans, ridiculous heels kicked off by the door, your jacket airing over the back of a chair.

he hasn’t taken down the pictures of you together. he hasn’t moved your ugly collection of magnets from the fridge. he hasn’t changed the blinds that you chose, but he didn’t really like. your candles sit on the bookshelf half burned, the teddy he’d won you at a fair sits neatly on the sofa. the L pendant and it’s chain is strewn over the coffee table, right where you left it the morning after it ended. your breathing is heavy.

the front door opens behind you.

you don’t move, your eyes still fixed on the silver chain, overwhelmed by how empty your neck feels all of the sudden. he comes up behind you, his head resting on your shoulder, arms finding home around your waist. you often used to find yourselves in this exact position; while you brushed your teeth, made coffee. the room is deathly silent, breathing and the distant buzz of post race festivities the only thing you can hear. lando follows your gaze.

“kept it. knew that one day, you’d come back for it.”

“i came back for you.”

“and that necklace will stay with you when i can’t be there.”

you nod. he kisses your neck.

“missed you so bad.” you gasp. he licks your skin, bites down softly.

you spin in his arms, his hands pawing at your hips and everything blurs when he kisses you.

-

shaky fingers work over zippers, buttons, clasps, and then you’re both bare. you sink into the mattress that you missed so much, his body moulded with yours when you both tumble into the sheets. this is messy and frantic, utterly lovestruck. the lightning strike of his touch has you keening, sweating beneath him already.

“missed you. missed this.”

“do something, lan.” you cry, quiet against his shoulder.

“missed my perfect girl.” he grunts, lips working your chest while his fingers leave a trail of goosebumps over your inner thigh.

“please.” you sigh when his fingers dip between your folds, sliding over your wet flesh. his lip catches between his teeth, eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of you.

he thumbs at your clit, stroking over you in slow, firm swipes, and then he’s sinking a digit into you, slow and steady. your toes curl, tears pricking your eyes at the intrusion, but you don’t have much of a chance to adjust, a second finger joining the first. he fucks you full, the stretch of just two fingers making you whine, one hand threading into the sheets while the other slams over your mouth. you want to hide, the pleasure rendering you a mess across the pale grey linen.

“no, let me look at you.” lando rasps, spare hand tugging at your wrist. you whine, writhing when he curls his fingers. “why are you hiding?”

you can’t hold back the choked cry that sounds from the back of your throat, his palm bumping your clit as he grinds his fingers deep.

“gone shy on me, baby? where’s my good girl gone?” lando coos, moving so that he’s leaning over you. the angle change sends your legs flying, kicking out at the sweet torture. “‘s because you haven’t been fucked right in so long, hm? can’t remember how to behave?” he’s smirking down at you, scanning the changing lines of your face.

“need it, need-“ you stutter, the words dying on your tongue.

“words, pretty girl, words.” lando encourages, false sympathy dripping from his tongue.

“need to cum, want you to make me…” you trail off.

“was that so hard?” he tuts, and everything speeds up.

the sound of him working you so sweetly makes you shake, your thighs clenching tight around his hand. the wet squelch hits your ears and you blush, cheeks coloured deep with embarrassment, awe, desperation.

your mouth drops open, screaming silently when it hits, your thighs slick. you drip down his wrist, his hand covered in your release.

“there’s my girl.” lando sighs, diving down to kiss you hard.

you can feel the damp press of his fingers as they dig into your thighs and you squirm beneath him, finding your way into his mouth.

“fuck me.” you slur, teeth knocking with his. he swallows you whole, groaning into your mouth.

“not so shy now, hm? been dreaming of hearing you beg for it.” lando shudders, shifting between your legs.

you can feel the press of him, thick against your cunt and you wiggle your hips, pushing to meet him halfway. the stretch burns deliciously, and you grab at his shoulders, dragging him in.

“fuck, baby.” he breathes, sinking into you slowly. “feel like heaven.” disbelief coats his voice, like he can’t reconcile that this is real; you’re back here, his, in the bed you were always supposed to share.

“it’s so good. feel so good for me, lan.” you whisper, lacing your fingers through his hair.

“love you so much.” he kisses you like he means it, rocking into you with purpose.

“can’t believe i lived without this.”

“can’t believe you’re all mine.”

the release builds, every thrust reminding you of what you could have lost for good. there was no lack of love, in fact you were starting to wonder if you had loved each other too much before.

“never losing you again. can’t live without you. my beautiful girl.”

your tummy grows tight, and he finds your clit when he feels you clamp down on him. he pulls you through the pleasure, guides you to your orgasm and you blindly follow him. you’d follow him anywhere, you decide.

you tell him you love him when you let go, spilling all around him, warm. he’s panting, kisses your forehead gently. he rolls off of you, and you feel the slow drip instantly, but you curl into his side and he wraps around you.

home.

“promise me something.” he whispers. you feel the way he shakily inhales.

“hm?”

“don’t leave again. you belong here, too. with me.”

your eyes are watery.

“i’m staying. ‘m yours.”

“about that…”

lando springs from the bed, naked, disappearing from the room. you watch, confused, cold all of the sudden.

you can hear his footsteps padding through the hallway, and then he’s back, his figure in the hallway. he runs, jumps, lands gracelessly next to you. endeared, you laugh softly.

“sit up.”

you do, leaning up to sit next to him. his fingers skim your shoulder, pushing your hair out of the way. cool metal dances over your skin.

“back where it belongs.” lando smiles at you, eyes wide and stunning.

you toy with the L. something heals in your chest, right around where your heart is.

“the sweetest boy.” you shake your head in disbelief, grin up at him like a fool.

“bath?”

“you know me so well, noz.”

come one, come all

it’s happening again

-

oh, my heart. there is something deeply wrong with me

-

taglist

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last updated: 08/08/2024

yandere / mafia / bad boy

romantic dreams - ( @kooktrash ) yandere!jungkook, tattoo artist jk, boxer!jk, UGHH ITS GOODDD, he´s so toxic frfr, namjoon is sick of his ass lmao, totally obsessed with reader, jealous and possesive af, he´s crazy sdlfjs but i´m into it

toxic noona - ( @aajjks ) yandere!noona, toxic controling relationship, jk is a victim, he´d rather die than leave, reader likes to make him cry, manipulation

crafting new memories - ( @peachypinkygloss ) yandere!jk FR, stockholm syndrome, jk kiddnaped reader and fucks her while making her watch herself on the news,,,her own missing sign

yours insanely - ( @smileyoongle ) yandere!jk, serial killer jk, detective!reader, he kills women who look like you, so interesting to read

darknet - ( @darkestcorners ) yandere!jk, the internet is scary, human trafficking, jk is scary dangerous, it´s a LOT, just wow

who is in control? - ( @ctrlsht ) yandere-ish, lawyer!jk, posessive jk, obsessive jk, toxic relationship, stalking, manipulation, secret relationship, he´s cray-cray

hybrid au / soulmate au / super hero au / alien au

bunnytalk - ( @woncon ) bunny hybrid jk, owner reader, jk is a sad bunny bc reader won´t return his feelings but it´s all just a misunderstanding

night vision - ( @bonny-kookoo  ) e.r, alien!jk, suggestive, lowkey smut, bunny hybrid reader, jk has tentacles ,,,,,nothing else to say, flirty fluffy jk, this is dIFFERENTTTT i love it

closer - ( @blublublujk ) smut, step siblings au, noona reader, yandere!jk, jk is obsessed with him older step sister, WHEWWW this is intense, very detailed, loved it

slice of life / university au / idol

you make him go crazy - ( @onlyswan ) fluff, idol!jk, slight angst, multiple scenarios, reader is constantly making him go nuts, he is STRESSED lmao, it´s cute anyways, reader is kind of a careless brat but jk wouldn´t have it any other way

you wear his clothes - ( @nochukoo97 ) fluff, thing is...HE gives you his clothes, he´s so boyfriendd

call me soon - ( @peachypinkygloss ) summer break up, strangers to fwb to lovers, obsessed jk

screw up; over wine - ( @koocycle ) finance major jk x model!reader, first date drabble, he is really into reader so he takes her to a fancy pricey wine and dine but guess wHAT.. he is broke lmao so he straight up PANICS, lowkey highkey secondhand embarrasment but it´s jk so it ends in a cute way

kiss me better - ( @jaykaysthicthighs ) angst, jerk jk, mean jk, misunderstanding, manhandling, he is crying bc he assumed she was cheating but he was sooo wrong, now he is begging, crying, throwing up,,, they make up anyways, its angsty in a satisfying way

you´re sleepy but you promised you´d go grocery shopping with him - ( @thvhoe ) e.r, its cuteeeee

couple questions with vogue - ( @kjdkive ) fluff, e.r, idol!jk, supermodel!reader, I LOVE THISSSS, he is the best boyfriend/fiancé soon to be hubby EVER UGHHHH its so cute

devoted to trouble - ( @jeonsweetpea ) fluff, lil angst, smut, comedy, spiderman!jk au inspired by seven??? a masterpiecE. the world finds out he is spiderman but he dgaf bc he only cares about you, #pininggg, reader playing hard to get, man i love tHIS

show you what devotion is - ( @thvhoe ) boxer!jk, ballerina!reader, fluff, angst. you´re like his safe place, it´s giving exes to wannabe lovers, they deff like each other and jk wants to eat her uP but he´s wants it to be romantic and stuff, idk idk I liked itttt

you surprise him for his birthday - ( @nochukoo97 ) he´s so boyfriendddddd, this is so wholesome and cute

he can´t sleep bc he loves you so much - ( @onlyswan ) now THIS makes me want to drink bleach and die bc of how cute it is, THEY ARE SO IN LOVEEEE, there´s a lot of giggling, a lot of praising, a lot of disgustingly sweet loving talk after sex :´)))))) its such a good read i promise

fighting heart - ( @kooktrash ) boxer!jk, fluff, angst, he´s so stressed sldfkj, reader gets in a small accident and jk went crazy when a nurse answered your phone

make a wish - ( @euaphoric ) fluff, little smut, best friends to lovers, reader is so sweet, birthday surprise, jk shoots his shot, he only wants to spend his birthday with you

daft pretty boy - ( @jeonqkooks ) basketball cap!jk, classmates to lovers ig, see he´s smart but when he´s with you he gets nervous and forgets how to exist, he lowkey confesses and he´s sraightforward with itt, he´s got a hUGE crush on you lmao

ride - ( @ohjeon ) strangers to lovers, fluff, angst, jk is a fucc boy on campus, reader has tattoos and rides the coolest bike, jk has an instant crush, love at firts sight i would say, got him blushing and sweating lmao, this is an on going series but I KNOW it´ll be gREAT, I love it already

in your arms - ( @kookslastbutton ) e.r, fluff, smut, morning secs, waking up by his side for the first time after moving in

encore - ( @jjungxkook ) game designer!jk, he is cool af, has a fat crush on reader, this is just the teaser of the fic but I really like it

crave you - ( @7deadlysinsfics ) idol!jk, crack, smut, fluff, hispanic choreographer reader, texting, taejikook, jk is HORNY but he´s a softie too, he´s got a big big fat crush, strenght kink bc we all know he can throw her around like a ragdoll

pretty girl - ( @bts-trash-blog ) smut, tattoo artist!jk, chubby reader, THIS IS ITTTTT, he´s tall, dark and handsome, flirty af too, "pretty girl" stFUUUU, they both want to fuck so he shoots his shot at the tattoo appointment

easy - ( @itsamejin ) angsty, fuckboy jk, bet!trope, jk plays you so he can get his rent paid, i read this one a lawwngg time ago and decided i was an angst loving hoe

Inevitable - ( @ahundredtimesover ) angst, fluff, smut, lovers to exes to lovers, baseball player!jk, dad!jk, parents au, you break up with jk years ago after you got pregnant bc you wanted him to follow his dreams and now he´s back home just to find out there´s a boy who looks just like him.. this is a masterpiece, honestly one of THEE best jk series out there, it has it all fr, the angst is angsty and the fluff is FLUFFY, i love it sm i´ve read it 3 times and never get tired of it

finish line - ( @bonny-kookoo ) fluff, nerdy!jk, racer!jki loooooveee itttttt, so cute, so fluffy, this blurb uGHHHHH, just read the whole thing pls

ungodly hour - ( @explicit-tae ) crack, smut, fluff, college au, broke college student!reader, lowkey slutty!reader, jk is thirsstttyyyyy, simping atp, "who´s dick do i have to suck for a hulu account?" this series is honestly so funny ksjakskjs

disney + and bust - ( @1kook ) angst, fluff, smut. yall already know i love to see man crying and begging for forgiveness :p, so kook is ur succesfull "app developer" bf and he says some very hurtfull things to you out of anger

rattled - ( @gukslut ) complete series, single dad au, angst, smut. honestly? one of the best fics out there. I read this a long time ago and i´m still in awe. The way this is written makes you feel every word. also, the plot is so so unique. i love it.

ceo au / sugardaddy au / rich bf au / coworker au

Over The Odds | The Confession - ( @jungk0oksthighs ) ceo jk, sugardaddy jk, jealous bf jk, sugar baby reader, he gets mad and yells bc he is lowkey insecure of her ex but reader is equaly in love. this is a series

wrong time - ( @spideyjimin ) smut, angst, dilf!jk, ceo!jk, exes to lovers, workaholic as a scape mechanism, the one that got away type of stuff but she broke things up first for valid reasons, big big heartache but she´s still the love of his life

don´t blame me - ( @ctrlsht ) sugar daddy!jk, ceo!jk, soft yan!jk, obsessive!jk, student!reader, unhealthy behavior on his part, manipulative behavior on her part, jealousy on both parts, he goes a lil too far but reader is bitchy and annoying, he lit gives her everythinggg she asks for, the man is..creazy about her in a very unhealthy way and she takes advantage of that, toxicc

failed quickie - ( @vminizzle ) cowerker jk, suggestive, they´re about to fucc on an elevator but it didn´t work, he likes his hair pulled!!1!

someone older - ( @bonny-kookoo ) smut, ceo jk, divorced jk, 30 something yo jk, taehyung has a kid, younger oc, its a nice read, would do it again

break up au / cheating au / fuckboy au

night after night - ( @brown-bi-beautiful ) smut, angst, crack, fluff, semi-retired fuckboy jk, red flag jk, stalker jk, break up au, lovers to exes to lovers, he fucked around and found out so he is FREAKING ouT, also he is beggING okk.. we love that, he also has a Harley bc he is bad boy™, they make up anyways bc he is pussy whipped.. or in love, whatevs you wanna call it

seven plus one - ( @jvngkoos ) smut, angst, they break up for like a week and that shit got him SIMPING fr, standing under the rain begging and stuff, the man is obsessed, we love it

pwp / fwb

you good?? - ( @mono-moonchilds ) drabble, smut, "what if you gave jungkook head?" is righT bc i´ve been thinking about it for a min!!! he is mean ok yall know he is a brat buT, the head is too good to do all that, the man was shaKINg for godssakeee, so good he had to answer with a thumbs up bc reader drained him fr, left him so brain dead he couldn´t even speak

afterglow - ( @elitekook ) smut, fwb!jk, slight possessive!jungkook, dirty talking, degrading nicknames, but he cares ok, he´s trying to get out of the friend zone

come sit on my lap - ( @euphoricfilter ) pwp, lots of praisingg, they way this is written is good yall, "use me" , “so polite” shUT UPPPP im literally blushing, AND he is also cute at the end?? i hate it heREEE :´)

he has a lot of cum - ( @euphoricfilter ) boyfriend!jk, the title I- , he DOES have a lot of cum, lots of stamina, lots of everYTHING, and on toP of those small details, wdym he wants to see how many times he can cum in you before it´s too full and it starts to spill????? somebody stop this man

riding jungkook´s nose - ( @euphoricfilter ) we´ve ALLL thought about this, and if you haven´t you´re lying, periodt. pRAISINGGG, he´s in a pussy-drunk frenezy, he likes feeling used, he likes getting his hair pulled, he likes getting his face wET, it´s sickenINGGGG goreaditplease

fucking in the gym - ( @euphoricfilter ) this was inspired by that one pic of him and jimin with their back out, I SEE THE VISION, fucking with ceiling mirrors

wicked - ( @noteguk ) smut, incubus!jk, big big corruption kink, lots of dirty ploting and dirty talk, yupppp this is a good one, so detailed, love me a fic that lit makes me see what i´m reading

[hannieehaee]

Idk if you're taking requests but I would give it a short and it would mean so much if you actually wrote smthg bout it.

An angsty fic/drabble where woozi and reader are in a long term established relationship and the reader gets their absolute dream job opportunity but it's far from Korea and she tells it to woozi but they get conflicted since woozi cannot transfer between his work and seventeen and reader does not want to give up this once in a life time opportunity. At the same time they are sceptical about a long distance relationship since reader had already been fed up of how less they get to see and stay with woozi with him travelling and working constantly.

You don't have to write it if it's too complex but I'd love to see cuz I really like the way you write!

content: idol!woozi x nonidol!reader, established relationship, light angst, fluff, long distance relationship, etc.

wc: 716

a/n: thank u so much!! im so sorry for how long i took to get this out!!

masterlist

it'd been a week since you told jihoon about your new work opportunity. a week since the air in your apartment became just a little bit colder and the future slightly more grim.

jihoon had been supportive immediately, congratulating you and insisting on you accepting the position. he'd been as supportive a boyfriend as he'd been in the past two years of your relationship. it filled you with warmth and hope for the future of your relationship.

it wasn't until you'd let him know of the location of said job that things became more sad than hopeful.

although he still maintained his supportiveness, there was now a clear air of worry in his voice any time it'd get brought up.

you'd tried to ignore it, pushing it aside until you found the courage in you to actually accept the position. it was your dream job. a once in a lifetime opportunity. except it was an entire country away from the love of your life. and you only had three more days to accept the offer letter they'd sent to you.

the thought of doing long distance would have been fine had you been anyone else. but you barely got to see your boyfriend as it was. living with him was really the only way for you to spend time together. his busy idol schedule had him going all over the world, and when he was at home he was usually ever at the company or in your shared apartment.

if you left, you'd give up on ever getting to see him.

"babe."

the voice took you away from your train of thought. the same train of thought distracting you for the past week.

you looked away from the tv that had been playing in front of you. you hadn't even been watching it, but the background noise helped.

jihoon was at the entrance of the living room, two mugs in hand as he walked over to you and took his usual seat, silently handing you your mug with a tight smile.

not even a single sip from your drink was taken before the subject filled the room once more.

"you need to take this job."

"jihoon ..."

"no, listen," he turned his body to face you, "you and i, we're a forever thing, okay? i don't care if we have to be away for a while. i'm already living my dream, it's unfair that you don't get to do the same," he argued with conviction in his eyes.

"but, jihoon ... it won't be like when you're touring. we'll never be in the same country at the same time, i-"

his hands went to take your mug, placing it on the coffee table before taking your hands into his own.

"i don't care!", his voice raised without meaning to, "so we'll have a year or two in which we can't be as close as we've always been, so what? it won't matter in the grand scheme of things. we'll be together for forty- no fifty years. a few years of uncertainty won't matter a few years from now. babe, please."

his voice pleaded at you.

he was afraid you'd end it all instead of at least trying.

what made it worse that he refused to consider a possibility in which you didn't go and follow your dream. it was a done deal to him. he loved you that much.

that was all you needed to make a decision.

"i'll take the job," you said decisively.

jihoon released a sigh of relief right away, hand squeezing your own in encouragement.

"i-i'll rent a place big enough for the two of us over there. i'll ask for a week off every six months. i'll have it written into my contract so i can go visit you. and- and we'll keep this place here for any time you have time off. we'll call every night, no matter what. even if it's just for two minutes, we'll- we'll make it work."

all you could do was smile at him.

how could you ever worry about change when he was willing to work so hard to move along with it all?

you kissed him then, shutting him up with no words.

and he understood, kissing you back with just as much unspoken love.

[wingedhallows]

fic recs; my absolute favorite works

hi there, i decided to put together a list of my absolute favorite fanfics, please check out the writers and their other works! & the list is in no order of liking

to the writers: thank you so much for writing these, i enjoyed each and every one of your fanfics, pls write more, love michelle &lt;3

navigation

angelic by @xreaderbooks (pls, my heart <3)

everything black by @firsttimewriter92 (came back to this one at least twice, girl- so good!!)

i see you by @hermioneshandbag (girl, girl- this was so good)

teaching a moderately old dog new tricks by @spxllcxstxr (got me blushing <3)

cherry bomb by @evanpeterswhoresblog ( chefs kiss, love love loved it <3)

dream guy by @themissingweasley26 (cute, loved it <3)

marrón by @amortentiainmyfirewhiskey (got me feeling like the baddest bitch)

i am half-agony, half hope...i have loved none but you by @sunnami (GIRL girl girl- this- i swear to god, it has me in a chokehold. your brilliant mind <3)

poly!marauders x reader - drunk james & reader by @moonstruckme (there's no title but, this was so cute)

i'll love you 'til the grass around my gravestone is deceased by @mybutcheredtongue (so cute, i love post azkaban sirius, your brilliant mind, god i love this!)

identation in the shape of you by @whorediaries-09 (i love post azkaban sirius & this comforted me so so much, i loved it <3)

i can't lose when i'm with you by @neytirisheaven (so good, i came back several times for this, loved it sooo much <3)

coward by @luv4freddie (girl- so good, i love love loved it <3)

foreign fancy by @princessconsuela120 (got me kicking my feet and smiling, girl-<3)

the american by @justagirlwholikesadam (i love this different take, so good that i came back to it several times, i loooved it <3)

pretty boy by @cloudybarnes (harry fics have a special place in my heart & i looooved this one <3)

revenge is a dish best served cold by @wonderlandwalker (so good, had me on my toes, i looooved it <3)

forget me, not by @folklvrsworld (girl- if u want a good cryin' sesh, read it, it was soo gooood, girl-<3)

come back, be here by @ellecdc (girl, girl, stop what u're doin' & read this, i loved every single word <3)

i am yours by @annabelinlove (i love poly!marauders fics & this one is a pretty good one, read it. now! loved it <3)

sad beginnings by @finelinevogue (wolfstar fics got me feeling some type of way, this is sooo goood <3)

just ours by @0x81 (wolfstar, what else should i say, read it, like yesterday, got me blushing and shit-)

the stash by @thebestofoneshots (if someone knows how to write smut than it's this writer, like how do u write like this- i'm speechless, flabbergasted <3)

divorcing orion black by @kquil (i've never quite read something like this, it's so so so good. pls more<3)

azkaban prison by @justsomerandomfanfic (i'd die for sirius black & this one in particular, more more more pls <3)

heroes in tattoos by @kquil (i'd die to read this for the first time again, like-I'm coming back to this whenever i have a rough day and i love it still, so goood <3)

new romantics by @pretty-little-mind33 (i love me a good james potter fic & this one has my feet kickin' & smilin' like an idiot <3)

injured (hip) by @hollowdeath (i love enimies to lovers & harry so- pls read it, it's great <3)

the one with the blouse by @super-clearlysaltybouquet (oh, how i love angst. i love love love angsty shit & this one was pure gold <3)

love potion and unspoken desires by @cyripticchronicler (amortentia stories are one of my favorites, this was absolutely great, read. it. now!)

[foreverisntenough]

You’re Mine

Summary: While you daydreamed about his face an ocean apart, he had no idea what yours was about to do to him. With a twist of fate and the heat of summer, a new relationship would completely ransack his heart - Everyday heavy with the thought of one another, neither of you were going to let the unexpected love of your life go. You were going to be his, you were his, and you were going to stay his.

Index:

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 |Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 26 | Chapter 27 | Chapter 28 | Chapter 29 | Chapter 30 - Complete ✨

Warnings: This series contains fluff, suggestion, smut (unprotected sex,) pregnancy, mention of the word ‘daddy,’ love bombing, occasionally sad, kind of angsty, alcohol consumption - not sure what else really… if i miss anything please lmk!

Note: I was planning on keeping this just locked in my head so please be nice. I hope you like it! The final chapter is out now! Go read ‘Ours,’ the sequel of this fic! It will chronical what happens in Trent and Y/N’s lives after the final part!

[yourstru1y4ever]

Day 2 - "Why? Why do you love me?"

Pairing: Satoru Gojo x Reader Word Count: 481 Content: Angst. . . whoops, hurt/comfort? I think?? Tuna-Tober 2024 Masterlist <- check out the other fics posted this month!

A/N: I had such a hard time debating which prompt to choose for this day because I liked all three options. I wanted to make this prompt happy and fluffy. . . I don't know what possessed me to make it angsty though. I also wrote this in 20 minutes so I apologize if it's not perfect.

The question lingers in the air, you turn around and see Gojo looking directly at you. His sunglasses are partially falling down his nose so you can see all of him, just as he can see all of you.

“Why? Why do you love me?”

He’s never asked a question like this so directly before, he always dances around questions like this. It’s caught you off guard, your mouth hanging agape at his bluntness. Why would he ask-?

He takes your silence as the answer as he drops your hand he was holding. Wait-

“Nevermind,” He adjusts his glasses so they cover his eyes and his stance becomes careless. You open your mouth, willing any sound to come out but nothing will. You feel your throat start to close up from anxiety and you can’t even breathe. Why would he-?

“I heard that there was a new cafe opening up nearby Jujutsu High, hopefully they’ll have better sweets than the one cafe I’ve been going to. It’s been such a pain to warp back and forth from the school to Shinjuku~” He puts his hands behind his head and starts walking forward, acting like he didn’t just ask-

“Because I just do!” You yell at him. He stops moving and turns to you, “What?”

“I love you because you’re so annoying it hurts. I love you because you push me out of my comfort zone and you get me to experience things I would have never tried before. I love you because if I didn’t then my world would come crashing down. I love you because there’s no one else I would rather love.” You step closer and closer to him, trying to get him to understand.

You reach up and gently put your hands on his face, cradling it. You bring his face down to meet yours, just inches apart from each other. You let go and remove his sunglasses, placing them on top of his head.

“Love takes work, and I’m willing to put that work in for you. I love you just because I do.” You caress his face and he leans into your touch hesitantly.

“I don’t want to lose you,” His voice cracks, “You won’t.” You reply quickly. A sad smile appears on his face.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep sweetheart.”

“Just because I’m not the strongest, doesn’t mean I won’t fight like hell to be with you,” You smile at him, “Try to have a little faith in me.”

He tilts his head to meet yours, your foreheads touching each other. You close your eyes and just feel. He wraps his arms around you and holds onto possessively, unwilling to let you go, as if he can wrap his infinity around you to keep you safe.

But he can’t, not forever at least. But for now holding onto each other will have to do.

[inuyashaluver]

happy new year angel!!!!! im sure u have heaps of request so no pressure this idea just popped into my head for niamhy (need more fics for her)!!!

so reader and niamh are lionesses but they aren’t v close/don’t interact because they both have crushes on each other but reader gets too shy/awkward about it so niamh thinks reader doesnt like her. but everyone notices the pining and awkward moments between them. anyway readers been playing in spain for their club team but isnt being treated well and gets an offer from chelsea which is perfect because its back home and an amazing team. the only thing reader is nervous about is being around niamh 24/7 and niamh is nervous about the same thing. anyway reader joins and quickly takes notice of how close niamh and jessie are and gets in her head about thinking of course niamh is taken, she’s so great. reader isnt jealous per say but definitely sad n insecure about it and then idk something happens, there’s some angst, niamh makes a move, they kiss, everyones happy!!!

misunderstanding - niamh charles

niamh charles x reader

description: in which you and your long time crush have a huge misunderstanding, maybe it was just what you needed?

warnings: swearing, a little angsty but not much, suggestive, a little long!

a/n: ITS NIAMHY BABY!! happy new year, my love! you’re so right, we need more niamh content! please enjoy and thank you for the request!! ❤️ i really don’t know how to feel about this one, i can’t think about it too much 😭

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you and niamh had a very..complicated relationship to say the least. you weren’t really sure where you stood with each other. you’d grown up together, working up the ranks in the lioness youth teams together as teammates, nothing else. but both of you wanted something more that the other had no idea about.

in your case, you had a form of infatuation for a certain brunette that you couldn’t even admit to yourself. you were pretty shy, finding comfort in familiarity where you wouldn’t step outside your comfort zone. the thought of you liking your teammate had you panicking.

your best friends ella and alessia had an inkling about your little crush, the way your eyes would linger on niamh at any point through the day, the way you would tense up and avoid eye contact as niamh would talk to the three of you were all telltale points that you were crushing. hard.

for niamh, she always found you earth shatteringly beautiful, not only physically but as a person. the way you carried yourself, the way you were so calm and collected, and how you were so kind, it made her heart flutter.

to say she had a little crush on you was an understatement, she tried everything she could to get you to even look her in the eye but you never would.

niamh was pretty sure you didn’t like her, you’d always go awkward, quiet when she approached you. that’s why it made things so hard for her, she desperately wanted you to like her back.

she never knew of the internal battle with yourself, how you were working up the courage just to have a full conversation with niamh but you could never get past the small talk.

—

“hey, (y/n)” niamh smiles as you walk into the change room, your eyes widen a little, swallowing the lump in your throat before you mutter up a small smile in return, feeling your cheeks burning.

“hi, niamh, you alright?” you breathe out, quickly walking to your cubby and busying yourself with changing. “yeah, i’m good, how are you?” niamh grins, happy you’re even talking with her. “fine” you smile a little dismissively, tugging on your training kit.

niamh’s eyebrows furrowed a little, looking at lotte next to her who just shrugged her shoulders, a little hint of a smile evident on lotte’s face as she watched you fan yourself to calm down your flustered face. looks like someone else knew about your crush.

when alessia came in shortly after, she gave a hearty laugh to a bashful, 16 year old you sitting in your cubby clearly panicking. niamh watched as alessia approached you, unable to hear your conversation.

“what did niamh do?” alessia teased with a whisper, “stop it, lessi” you whisper shout back, praying your cheeks weren’t flamed right now.

“so shy” alessia teased, you cover your face with your hands, recounting the tiny interaction with niamh and internally cursing yourself for not talking to her more.

“do you think i’m being obvious?” you whisper, alessia gives you a sympathetic smile, “painfully” you sigh loudly, covering your face with your hands while alessia assured you everything was okay.

niamh feels a little weird seeing the interaction, a funny feeling bubbling in her stomach as she watches you eventually smile when alessia makes you giggle at a joke. she wishes it could’ve been her in the situation, the one making you giggle.

—

it really only got worse from there, the more your affection for niamh grew the more it became obvious to anyone around you.

niamh didn’t notice it however, you weren’t outwardly flirting or anything, but she did take note of how she would catch your eye staring at her occasionally.

a little smirk would play at her lips at the thought of you liking her back. until you’d converse, and it would throw her for a loop again thinking you didn’t like her.

“so, (y/n), I heard you got a contract lined up in spain, that’s amazing, congratulations!” niamh smiles proudly, making an effort to sit in the empty chair next to you at the hotel breakfast before your boarded the bus for the under 20 team.

“yeah, um, i got a bit sick of the cold i guess” you joke, taking a little sip of water to ease your nerves, niamh smiles amusingly, you weren’t really one to joke with her.

“hm, pretty good idea, maybe i should play in spain, i’m made for the sun” niamh teases, you choke on your water slightly, coughing while niamh gently pat your back.

“shit, you okay?” niamh’s eyes widen, you nod vigorously, recovering with a sheepish expression plastered on your features.

ella and alessia burst out into laughter when you sat there insisting you were fine to niamh, muttering something about needing to change.

“don’t laugh at her, she just choked” niamh scolds as she watches you walk hurriedly out of the room, “oh, niamhy, that’s not what we’re laughing about” ella giggles, winking at niamh and promptly confusing her.

—

niamh signed a contract to chelsea and was truly flourishing, getting played and getting along with her teammates, it was what she wanted.

you on the other hand, were struggling.

it was hard being so far from home, you barely got any play time, but when you did, you played exceptionally and everyone said so. that’s why it was so confusing when you only got played occasionally.

your teammates didn’t really hang out with you outside of training because you didn’t speak spanish very well.

niamh kept tabs on you, she was concerned you weren’t getting played, how you barely posted on social media anymore.

it truly upset her, so much so she would frequently call ella and alessia just to see if you were alright but even they couldn’t get anything out of you.

you felt alone, trapped almost, so when the contract to chelsea arrived in 2021, you accepted without a second thought. being closer to home, family, friends, it’s all you wanted at that point.

when the news came of your transfer, excitement overtook niamh, she was ecstatic knowing she’d be able to be around you, rather than just nationally.

you were slightly terrified at the thought of being around niamh all the time, scared of how obvious you could be.

—

“hello, stranger!” an excited millie exclaims as you get out of your car, “hi, millie” you smile brightly, letting her hoist you up in a big hug, laughing as she swings you around.

“we’ve missed you, welcome home” she pats the top of your head, slinging an arm over your shoulder and showing you around.

“i’ve missed you too” you smile, getting introduced to a couple of girls in the change room until millie dragged you to the gym.

that’s when you see her, niamh talking to jessie in the corner of the room, looking as beautiful as ever. niamh and you obviously saw each other on national duty but after all that time of not seeing her, you fell in love all over again.

your heart panged a little when you saw jessie’s hand lingering on her arm but you dismissed it when millie called out to niamh. she turns and visibly brightens when she sees you.

“(y/n/n)!” niamh cheers, bolting over to you and pulling you into a tight embrace. one of her hands on your back while the other cradles you head.

“you’re home” she breathes out relieved, you’ve never hugged niamh for more than a second, it shocked you at how quick you melted into her embrace, finally getting that feeling of home you’ve been craving.

your own arms wound around her back while she held you close. “hi, niamhy” you breathe out with a little laugh, her heart fluttered at the nickname, sure she gets called that by everyone but you’re not everyone. you’re you, niamh’s.

she gave you one last squeeze before she pulled away, smiling at you shyly with pink cheeks as you made eye contact.

“i’ve been worried about you,” niamh squeezes your bicep gently as you looked up at her, relishing in the fact that you’re making eye contact. “i missed you, you know?” she grins,

your cheeks burn at that, the thought of niamh thinking about you, “me too” you say sheepishly. “if you ever want to talk about anything, ever, i’m here for you” niamh says earnestly,

your eyes grow a little watery, “thank you” you smile, unable to stop yourself from pulling her into another little hug, surprised by your own confidence.

niamh smiles in your embrace, moving back to look at you properly. you were as beautiful as ever, seemingly getting more gorgeous by the second.

“welcome home” she grins, pinching your cheek softly and squeezing your cheek teasingly, feeling accomplished when it spurred a little giggle from your lips.

jessie smiled as she watched the interaction, knowing all about niamh’s feelings towards you after her drunken confessions one too many times at a team bonding session.

“your girls finally here” jessie teases, niamh looks at you with a smile, watching as you talk to the new teammates around you. you seemed lighter, almost softer at this time, still shy but somewhat more confident.

“yeah, she is” niamh nods, turning back to jessie and immediately slapping her arm when she sees the teasing smile she was giving her.

you feel better about everything, getting along with everyone, playing better than ever that emma even complimented you on it, you were relieved. but the one person you wanted to impress was niamh, and impressed she was.

“god, i told you i needed to go to spain, superstar! i can’t keep up with you!” niamh laughs as she marks you, you laugh brightly,

“you were never one for the cold, were you niamhy?” you tease.

—

as the weeks went by, you and niamh got closer, you were able to talk to her without feeling like you needed back up.

“good morning, beautiful” niamh grins when you walk into training, “morning, charlesy” you giggle, moving to talk with her and jessie before the session started.

niamh was so excited about your blossoming relationship, flirting a little openly to test the waters and pleasantly surprised you would return in occasionally before catching yourself.

you got to training one day and again, like usual saw jessie and niamh, laughing loudly and joking around with each other in the change rooms. something about it had you feeling a little weird.

you liked jessie, a lot, she was one of the people that made you feel most comfortable, and of course you liked niamh, you liked them both, so why did it break your heart seeing them together?

jessie on the other hand had been giving you obvious signs that her and niamh were strictly platonic but you got in your head.

you couldn’t help but pull away from niamh, finding other people to talk with, to train with, niamh felt like you were both at square one. 16 year olds in love without knowing it of course, avoiding each other in fear of rejection.

when niamh noticed you pulling away from her again, it scared her. you were finally opening up, talking about spain and more, and now you just said hello to her.

she wracked her brain and truly couldn’t figure out why you didn’t want anything to do with her.

you felt awful about yourself, of course niamh had someone love and of course it wasn’t you. jessie was perfect and you understood that. you felt that the more you talked to niamh, the worse you felt, feeling like you were betraying jessie.

all you could think in the best case scenario was, why would niamh want anything to do with you? unaware of how much niamh truly loved you.

your eyes would linger on the two of them interacting, a clear hint of jealousy and disappointment written all over your face.

“hey, do you wanna train together?” niamh walks up to you sitting in your cubby, lacing up your boots. you pause and look up at her,

“shouldn’t you be training with jessie?” you question, almost like it’s obvious. niamh’s eyebrows furrow a little, “what do you mean?” niamh laughs a little.

you huff out a breath, finishing up with your boots and moving past her, “go with jessie, i’ll train with jess today” you dismiss, niamh got really confused there, watching as you walked away from her. she needed to pull out the big guns.

—

“hey, less” niamh breathed out on the phone, “niamhy! long time no talk since your little lovebird turned blue” alessia teased, niamh shakes her head with a sigh, she wasn’t lying.

“yeah yeah, that’s who i’m calling about” niamh admits, fiddling with the ends of her hoodie as alessia giggled on the phone.

“i thought so, what’s up?” alessia smiled, feeling like she was about to be asked for relationship advice with you. “okay, well, we’ve been talking more, she’s finally looking me in the eye but she just stopped and started pulling away from me again.” niamh rambles, alessia thinks and hums for a second,

“hm, that’s weird, something must be going on with her” alessia admits, they continue talking and rule out that niamh needed to confront you about it. and so, the next day, niamh made her move.

—

“hey, can i talk to you for a minute?” niamh knocks on your car window, you’d just pulled up to the training grounds.

you nod at her confused, unlocking the door and letting her slip in the passenger seat as you both sat in an awkward silence.

“so” you breathe out, “so” niamh parrots, clearing her throat and moving to face you. “are you okay?” niamh says simply, you look up at her, angling your body so you could face her,

“i’m fine, why?” you cock your head, niamh shakes her own, “no, (y/n), you’re not okay” niamh sighs frustratingly, “niamhy-” you start,

“no, you’re not okay, you’re pulling away” niamh argues, your eyes widen a little at the volume. “pulling away from what?” you scoff, “from me!” she exclaims, running a hand over her face.

“niamh, i’m not trying to pull away from you” you sigh, niamh looks over at you with a quirked brow, “it’s just” you choke out, “i don’t want to cross any lines with you” you shrug, niamh looks perplexed in that moment, “what do you mean?”

“niamh, you have a girlfriend, i don’t want to cross a boundary with you and fuck up your relationship” you mutter,

niamh’s eyes widen, stuttering while trying to conjure up an answer, “(y/n), i do not have a girlfriend” niamh asserts, watching as your face goes a little relieved.

“but jessie-” you start, niamh is quick to cut you off, “jessie fleming is my best friend and most definitely not my girlfriend” she looks you right in the eye, you go a little red under her gaze.

“what, you were scared i was taken? something you’re not telling me?” niamh teases, you roll your eyes fondly, smiling at the brunette in front of you.

“hm, i don’t know, charles, what do you think?” mocking her tone, she smiles at that, moving her body over a little more so she could really face you.

“sounds like you like me?” she grins, you shrug with a little smile, “and if i did?” you tease, niamh chuckles amusingly, looking down at your lips quickly before looking back in your eyes.

“well, i’d like to do something about it” she grins, “i’m not opposed” you tease, “what happened to my shy girl, huh?” niamh whispers, getting closer to you over the centre console.

“spain” you shrug, niamh chuckles at that, her hand moving to cradle your cheek. “gonna kiss me, charles?” you smirk, niamh shakes her head amusingly, loving how forward you were being.

you were honestly bubbling with anxiety, but in a good way. niamh grins before moving forward to pull you into a breathless kiss.

when she pulled away, you can’t help but go a little pink, “there she is, my shy girl” niamh teases, kissing you fondly a couple of times, making your head foggy and somehow ending up straddling her lap in the passenger seat of the car.

“i love you” you whisper softly, kissing niamh quickly before pulling away to look at her, drinking in her pink cheeks and blown out pupils, almost looking in a mirror to you.

“i love you” niamh says without missing a beat, smiling at you sweetly before breaking out into little fits of giggles.

you stayed in that position for a while, laughing and recounting all the points where your were flirting without realising, all the obvious moments you were in love.

—

you and niamh had been dating from that day till now, about two years of absolute bliss for the two of you.

you moved in together and when everyone found out the two of you were dating, no one would shut up about how it was a long time coming.

you were both on camp for the lionesses and when you and niamh walked hand in hand and cheesy grinned, the teasing doubled.

sure everyone knew you were together, witnessing the whole relationship but that didn’t mean they wouldn’t tease the two of you as much as they could.

“i feel bad for who has the room next to theirs” millie teases at breakfast, you instantly groan, moving closer to niamh while the team whistled and giggled at how red you got. “fuck yeah, get it niamhy” ella laughs

you hide your face in niamh’s chest as she tucks you into her side, “fuck off” niamh chuckles, her arm grabbing your legs and draping them over her thighs.

“you are quite loud, baby” niamh whispers in your ear, your eyes widen and you slap her on the chest, “says you!” you scoff, taking your legs off hers and crossing your arms over your chest.

“babe, come on” she pleads with a smile, “don’t be grumpy” she chuckles, kissing your cheek, dragging you closer.

“stop it, niamh” you grumble, “oo, you got first named” alessia teased, ella instantly laughs and joins in on the teasing, niamh flips them both off and they attempt to contain their giggles.

“baby girl” niamh kisses you cheek again, lifting you from your seat, causing you to yelp when she perches you up on her lap.

“don’t be mad, gorgeous, i love how loud you are” she whispers in your ear again, “you’re one to talk” you whisper back, niamh nods sympathetically, “i know, baby” she pouts, you laugh a little in her embrace.

“you’re cheeky” you sigh, niamh smiles brightly at you, kissing the underside of your jaw, giggling a little when you squirm.

“only for you” she whispers, playfully nipping your jaw as you melted into her on instinct. niamh moves to kiss your cheek repeatedly, making you giggle, your hand moving to cradle her cheek. she chuckles against your skin, you had each other wrapped around your fingers.

“i rest my case” millie laughs when you place a sweet kiss on niamh’s lips, “aren’t you in the room next to us, mills, we can arrange it if you want?” you tease, niamh laughs loudly, her arms around your waist giving you a little squeeze.

millie’s smile drops, “you know what, ever since you started dating charles, you’re too bold, you used to be so shy” millie scolds, you shrug and kiss niamh again teasingly, making everyone laugh around you.

niamh smiles amusingly against you when you slip your tongue into her mouth quickly, pulling away with a satisfied smile and wiping her bottom lip with the pad of your thumb, making her kiss it when it lingered for a second too long.

“hm, she’s a bad influence” you address millie, only looking at niamh when she playfully bites your thumb, looking down at her with an affectionate smile.

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you know the drill - just pretend it’s you! ily tooney x

liked by ellatoone and 44,232 others

niamhcharles17: apparently i’m a bad influence

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yourname: you are.

↳ niamhcharles17: okay, baby xxx

mbrighty04: i don’t appreciate your bad influence, you’ve wrecked our little shy girl

↳ niamhcharles17: she’s not shy at all

↳ yourname: thin ice, charles. thin.

alessia: they’re in lovvveeeeee

↳ ellatoone: love birds

[ryker-writes]

Your angst fic had made me go into angst creative mood. Twisted wonderland Character/s of your choosing of younger sibling that have chronic illness but hide it from their family. Often when to the toilet to cough out blood to avoid suspicious. Even went as far as asking the dr to keep it a secret because they don't want to burden their family and wanted them to enjoy their life because they already suffer so much and the distance actually help. Until sibling collapse and went into coma and the Dr had to break the news that they don't have much time left.

If it not to much- I'm feeling very angsty-

Oh my the heavy angst. This is so sad tho but I love it. These actually ended up longer than I thought they would be. I just had too many thoughts and it hurt my soul to write this because it's so sad but I enjoyed it

sorry not sorry if anyone cries <3

Characters: Leona, Idia, and Malleus

warnings: Mentions of blood, implied reader death, angst, no happy ending

Request rules and Masterlists

Leona:

you knew you should tell Leona about your condition

he was your older brother and he should know

but Leona was pretty protective and would drive himself mad demanding that somebody find something to help you

and he would spend all of his time worrying and fussing over you

so you didn't tell him

you wanted him to enjoy things and be happy

he's already struggled so much growing up and you don't want to burden him more

also you wanted to peacefully enjoy the time you had with everyone without a lingering sadness in the air

so you pleaded with the doctor to keep it a secret

and thankfully they did

all you had to do was hide the blood that you may cough out

so your bathroom trips became more frequent

Leona even joked that you should see the doctor about how much you have to go to the bathroom

but he didn't know the truth, and he was happy

that's all you wanted

until one day you woke up feeling weaker

you tried to fight it and carry on as you normally would

but for some reason you just couldn't

it was when you were walking in botanical garden towards Leona

black spots started to cloud your vision and you felt like you lost control of your body

the last thing you heard was Leona shouting

Leona was very worried when he saw you collapse

and you weren't responding to him either

he rushed you to the infirmary as quickly as he could and demanded that the doctor sees you immediately

when the doctor tells him that you're in a coma and don't have much time left, he's angry

how could you not tell him about your illness

he would've tried to help you if you just told him

Leona will spend most of his time by your side, waiting for you to wake up

he's not going to waste a moment somewhere else

he doesn't know what to do with himself

he's so angry with himself for not knowing sooner and not being able to do anything

you have to wake up, you just have to

Idia:

the Shroud family was a strange one

most of the family were shut-in's that were pretty isolated and lonely

your big brother Idia was a prime example of this

he spent most of his time behind the screens and barely interacted with other people

and he didn't really have friends either

both you and Ortho wanted him to be happy

and that's why you didn't tell him about your illness

if he knew he would isolate himself further and bury himself in trying to help

he would sacrifice his own health for the sake of you

and you couldn't let that happen

though you did hope that somehow he would be able to be happy and have a friend before your illness took over

it was difficult to keep it hidden

Ortho regularly does scans on you and Idia's health so he knows if something is wrong

so he knew, but you had to convince him not to tell Idia

it was a long process and filled with tears but he gave in eventually

and so when you would spend time with Idia, Ortho would be a little sad but hide it well

when you made and excuse of going to the bathroom Ortho knew what was happening and would make up some excuse to Idia about you drinking a lot of water or something

but then one day you were walking through the school halls with Ortho and Idia's tablet

it hit you so suddenly that you didn't even have time to react

as you coughed you could feel the blood sputter out and onto your chin

this coughing fit seemed worse than the rest and you couldn't stop

it hurt and even brought you down to the ground, and after a bit you passed out

Ortho was quick to help stabilize your condition and take you to the infirmary

all that came from the tablet was panicked noises and frantic questions

once the doctor checked up on your condition, he gave them the bad news

you had been sick for a long time and it's led you to a coma

with the way your condition was progressing, you didn't have much time left

Idia was so confused

how could both he and Ortho not notice especially when Ortho did health scans

but Ortho didn't answer and Idia could just tell that Ortho already knew

Night Raven College was buzzing with gossip that day

some were saying they saw Idia Shroud himself quickly walking through the halls and others denied that it couldn't be true

the notorious shut-in would never even leave his room or go outside Ignihyde

but the rumors were true

Idia Shroud had left his room and walked through the halls to the infirmary

and he stayed there all day constantly checking up on every little change in your condition

and when he wasn't checking on your condition he would sit there quietly and think

why did this have to happen?

why did it have to be you?

it wasn't fair

Idia was making the stressful trek through the halls every day so he could stay by your side in case you woke up

as he sat there he would play some of his video games and tell you all about it like he normally would, but this time you weren't able to respond

Malleus:

Malleus didn't have a lot of people he treasured in his life

those in Diasomnia were like his family, but you were actually his family so he treasured you dearly

he was always looking out for you and doing everything he could to make sure you were happy, and you wanted the same for him

so when the doctor had informed you of your illness and what would happen, you didn't want to tell him

Malleus would be crushed at the news

He had always been someone who was lonely

and you were like the one person he had that wasn't required to be around him

if he were to learn that you would soon be taken away from him, he wouldn't be able to cope

and you wanted to see him happy as long as you would be here

you couldn't tell him and instead kept it hidden from everyone

Malleus never questioned it much when you ran off to the bathroom

he would just ask if you were alright and once you said you were, he wouldn't ask past that

and so many days and even weeks past as you spent time with Malleus

he seemed happy and you were happy to see him like that

but it was when you were going on one of his gargoyle walks when the world started to spin

you wanted to ignore it and act natural before Malleus could notice, but it was all to much

your legs seemed more tired than usual and you fell to the ground

you could hear Malleus ask you repeatedly what was wrong but you couldn't answer

then the world faded to black

The great Malleus Draconia was terrified

you weren't responding to him and he didn't know what was wrong

his healing magic was amazing, but he couldn't heal injuries he didn't know about

so he picked you up and teleported the two of you to the infirmary

the doctor had to stop whatever they were already doing when the fae prince himself demanded his assistance

and the doctor checks up on you and tells Malleus everything

you were sick, now in a coma, and you were running out of time

the room was quiet for a minute as Malleus processed what the doctor said

and then, thunder

the worst thunderstorm Night Raven College has ever seen has been summoned

lightning was striking all around the campus and many students were taking shelter while terrified

but the infirmary was the safest place from the storm

Malleus sat by your side quietly pondering his thoughts

he was angry

not at you but at your illness for doing this to you, life for cursing you this way, and mostly at himself

he should've been able to see the signs before it got to this point

he should've been there for you

he should've helped you

how ironic it is that one of the most powerful mages was so helpless to save the one person they treasured most of all

Lilia, Silver, and Sebek came to find him after the storm started

and when they did, they didn't even say anything, but felt the heavy atmosphere

Lilia tried providing some comfort, but Malleus just stayed silent

for days after that, his three guards stood outside the infirmary and prevented anyone from disturbing the two of you

the storm persisted and Malleus never left your side

he would sit there for hours silently wishing for you to wake and be okay

even though he knew that was unlikely

but he wouldn't leave and possibly miss you waking up

that was simply one event he wouldn't miss

Malleus was never good at noticing how quickly time passed

but as he sat by your side, he was painfully aware of every passing second that you lie there

[oh-koenig-my-koenig]

merrily we fall out of line

(over-)protective!bestfriend!könig x reader (gn!pronouns) sfw MDNI slight age gap (reader mid to end 20s, könig early to mid 30s), grumpy x sunshine, (best) friends, mutual pining, (thus a bit) angsty; mentions of cheating (not between them), non-descriptive violence (dito) a/n: my first 'you'-reader fic (instead of the usual POVs i do), be gentle :')

You like König, he’s an old friend of yours, gone for months at a time, but when he is back home, you meet up, talking – well, you are talking more than him, the giant listening to you stoically – just spending time together. As friends, and that’s fine. It’s fine, really.

He has never shown the same interest in you, you’re always friendly with each other, but it is toned-down. Platonic.

So you get together with someone else. You tell König all about it – your new partner and how you met them – when he returns from his latest mission and his reaction tells you that you were right. He doesn’t really say anything, stoic and calm like always. Asking you some more questions. If you are happy in the relationship. Nothing less, but also nothing more.

König even meets the s/o and he’s trying to keep it together, because – obviously you would have never gone for him, he's too intimidating, too old, too closed off for you. At least that’s what he’s telling himself.

But still. The hot raging jealousy he feels as he watches you being touched by your new partner makes him almost see red. It's his own goddamn fault, he should have said something, anything, in all those years, all those moments you spent together, but he never did. Now he only has himself to blame.

He excuses himself from the situation, not able to stay any long, not able to watch the two of you any longer. Leaving, not without whispering a threat to the partner ("be good to them or else") while shaking their hand, and not without squeezing your arm softly one last time, because to get over you he has to stay away.

But König isn’t really able to stay away, still obsessed with you, still keeping an eye out for you, like he did so far. You on the other hand see much less of him, even when he's on leave, as he tries to respect your boundaries.

Can't say the same for your new partner, who rubbed him the wrong way when they first met. And when he follows them one day and catches them cheating on you... on you! The nerve.

He barely can hold himself back as he confronts them, but he remembers you, and he wouldn't want you to see him as a monster, so he stops himself from beating the shit out of them. He seethes: “Leave them or I will take them from you.”

And your partner ruefully breaks up with you, telling you everything except that they were caught by König. It hasn’t been a long relationship, but still, this feels shitty, obviously, tears streaming down your cheeks and sobs shaking you as you call the one person you trust most.

And of course, König comes over, he’s there to pick up the pieces, still convinced that you don't see him the same way he sees you.

He spends the whole evening with you, watching sappy romance movies and eating ice cream, the grumpy big man on the edge of the couch, trying to hide his bruised knuckles. Trying not to come too close and give you your space, but the furniture isn’t big enough for the two of you. Well, for him anyways.

He’s staying because you said you didn't wanna be alone. Honestly, he is a little unsure what to do because you just can't seem to stop crying and he hates to see you like that.

And then he makes an off-hand comment about one of the protagonists of the romance movie you're currently watching, and a sobbing laugh breaks through your sad grimace.

After that all he tries is to make you laugh until you shake with laughter, begging him to stop, your hands holding your tummy, because your stomach hurts.

“Please, I can’t.”, you roar, hiding your face on his shoulder, your tears staining the shirt he's wearing. Wiping the ones away that still wet your cheeks, looking up at him and giving him the first real smile this whole evening.

And he smiles back, a rare occasion.

But then he tells you that he has to go. You ignore the pit in your stomach, the corners of your mouth turning down, before he quips: "If you ever need a shoulder to laugh on, just call me." which makes you laugh again.

"Thank you.", you tell him and before you can think too hard about it, you stretch up and press a small, chaste peck to his cheek.

Only in this moment he turns to you, so it doesn't land on his cheek, but rather on his lips.

His whole world topples upside down when you kiss him, your mouths touching for just a moment, and he rears back, in total shock and awe, not sure what to do now. The one part of him is screaming at him to kiss you back, to grab you, to finally make you his, all the reasons why he shouldn't forgotten about. The other part is trying to be reasonable, especially now after your break-up, just needing a friend, and not.... him.

"I- I'm sorry.", you say when he just sits there, looking at you all dumbfounded. He would have been less surprised if you smacked him across the face.

He shakes his head. "No, don't apologize. I-", he stammers, his words breaking off, and your hand landing on his thigh pulls him from his thoughts.

“König-“

He shoots up, standing up straight, his tall stature towering over you. "I have to go.”, he says, heading to the door and you can feel disappointment seep into you.

"You don't have to go.", you say, following him. It almost seems like he’s running away from this.

He shakes his head again, and when he looks at you, you can't decipher the emotions in his eyes. "I do.", he says, and then he's out the door.

You just stand there in your shitty oversized shirt that you only ever wear at home when nobody else is here, your face swollen from all the crying. All alone again, the apartment silent except for the soft noises and the romantic music from the tv.

Stupid, stupid thinking that he might like you, stupid wasting the first kiss between you two like that, but... it also wasn't intentional. It was an accident. You didn’t mean to kiss him like that. But his lips felt so soft… Their softness and the softness of his gaze in contrast to his tall, muscled stature, his stern features and stoic nature.

You sigh, traipsing back to the couch, letting yourself fall into the cushions, feeling tears prick in the corners of your eyes, burying yourself in the plush. Being left is hard, and being rejected by the man you just can't stop thinking about.... the same day. Fuck.

You groan, hiding your face in a cushion, when there is a knock on your door. Heavy and impatient. You raise your head, your hands wiping away the wetness on your cheeks.

Knock-knock.

The knocking again. You get up from the couch, taking a few hesitant steps towards the door. It must be him. Opening it, and König’s figure fills the whole frame. Looking down at you while you look up at him.

He sees your teary eyes and curses. Something in Austrian German that you don’t understand. The words sound funny, not matching the expression on his face. The frown pulling the sides of his mouth down, the brows furrowed.

“Wanna come in again?”, you ask him, your voice steadier than you feel right now, gesturing into the flat. He does, and you take a step back to let him pass, closing the door behind him.

He makes one full circle across your carpet before he just stands there, swaying from one foot to the other. Seeming anxious, something that happens to him, albeit not so often with you, so you just give him a moment.

“I’m just…” He sighs, deeply. His gaze panning up from the floor to you, and suddenly you irrationally wish you put on some other clothes, before he speaks again.

“That was my first kiss, okay?”, he admits, and your jaw drops. His… first… kiss? But… That can’t be! Not at his age. I mean, you never saw him with anybody, but surely, he must’ve – must have – had his share of partners. At least one?

“Don’t look at me like that.”, he says, a heavy blush colouring his cheeks.

You avert your eyes for just a moment, but they find their way back to his. “I’m sorry, I just can’t believe that you never, uh…”, you try to find the right words.

The muscle in his jaw jumps, a sign that he’s tense. “I did stuff with people before, I’m not a-” He hesitates for a second. “Not a virgin or anything. I just never kissed anybody.”, he swallows. “Before.”

“Oh, I see.”, you say, unsure what else to say. Completely floored by this information.

“I just…”, he starts again. “Most other people only see me with the mask, I… almost never take it off, also during… that, and kissing through the mask would be weird, so yeah.” He rushes through the last sentence like he just had to get the words out.

Moments of silence passing by as you try to collect your thoughts. “I didn’t mean to, you know. Kiss you, on the lips.”, you finally say, your voice sounding a little hoarse. “Didn’t want to take that moment from you. That first time.” You clear your throat, tangling your fingers with each other, fidgeting. “Sorry.”

His eyes widen, slight shock spreading on his face. “No, no, I didn’t mean it like-“

Fuck, this isn’t going how he wanted it to. Maybe he shouldn’t have come back, just let you be. But the look on your face, your gentle plead as he basically ran away, the need to explain this situation, made him turn around again as soon as he stood outside your apartment building.

He takes a step in your direction, his hands shooting out in your direction, almost touching you, before they drop to his sides again. His body is so close to yours, you can feel the warmth radiating off him, just like before when you were sitting on the couch.

You look up at him, tilting your head back. Meeting his eyes, the familiarity of them calming you. And there it is again. That look on your face that makes him wanna grab you, hold you and never let go.

“I imagined for so long what it would be like to kiss somebody.”, he says, quietly. “I imagined what it would be like to kiss you. I just wasn’t… prepared.”

He… what? Tingles erupt in your stomach, making you feel lighter, your mouth dropping open, soundlessly gasping for air, at his confession.

“I didn’t wanna make you cry or anything, but I didn’t wanna, you know, with the whole… break-up and…” He looks down to his feet, sighing. Not saying the thing about ‘Him being him’.

“I thought it’d just be better.” He sighs again. “Better if I go.”

The stupid, stupid feeling of hope fills you at his words which makes you put it all on one card.

“You wanna try it again? The kissing?”, you whisper, taking a step forward, coming a bit closer.

His eyes jump to yours, the brows pulled up in surprise. After a moment, he nods. “Yes.” But he is not moving an inch. The tall man, frozen in place. Looking at you, hesitating, wanting to kiss you so badly, just the tiniest bit afraid to do it wrong.

You lean in, craning your neck. Your hand landing on his chest, firm and warm underneath your fingertips, steadying yourself and getting on your tiptoes.

His breath hits your face a moment before your lips press against his. Pulling him from his frozen state. He leans down, meeting your touch, his arms are closing around you, holding you closer to his body. A soft hum rising up his throat as he answers the kiss.

The gentle brush of his mouth against yours getting a little needier with every passing second, exploring you. So much softer than he had expected. The short peck you accidentally gave him before not coming close to this feeling now.

You stretch up, your arms coming around the nape of his neck. Needing him closer, pulling him down to you. Sighing into the kiss, your mouth dropping open a little bit.

His tongue brushes against yours, his hand gently holding the side of your face, his thumb brushing your cheek. You’re leaning into his palm, tilting your head, opening up to deepen the kiss until the two of you are making out.

Bittersweet, warm. Tasting just like you imagined him to. And a hint of the icecream you shared.

If he didn’t just tell you that he never kissed anyone before, you would have never guessed. Taking his time, slowly, oh so slowly. Maybe a little bit hesitant, but the way his lips brush against yours, the way his tongue is stroking against yours...

A pang of need is spreading down your body, the tingle remaining low in your belly, and he swallows up the sounds you make, not stopping to explore you, and you answer every single one of his touches. Both of you not coming up for air, breathing each other in.

He lifts you up, and you don’t still break the kiss as he carries you over to the couch. Lying down on the furniture, your front against his as you prop yourself up, not willing to leave the kiss. Pressing your lips against his, over and over again, wondering how you could ever stop doing that. Wondering how you never did that before.

“I’m glad we accidentally kissed.”, you say, mumbling the words against his lips.

He laughs a little, a light sound. “Me too.”, he simply says, cradling your face, deepening the kiss again. Something that makes you feel restless in the best way possible.

It feels so new and yet familiar, the way your smaller frame fits against his. He always thought that you are so tiny compared to him, when in reality you are not tiny at all, he is just that big, filling up the whole couch, so the only space for you is on top of him. He doesn't mind at all and you don't either.

Quite the contrary as you lay your head on his chest. Hearing his heartbeat, feeling it against your cheek, still a little faster than it should be. Because kissing you did that to him.

You’re melting into his body, the warmth of his embrace as his big arms hug you. Yawning a little bit, which makes him chuckle.

“Tired?”, he asks.

“Just a little.” Another yawn.

“That’s okay.”, he says, stroking over your hair. Kissing you on the forehead, a small, sweet peck. “Just sleep, Schatz.”

His cheek against the top of your head, his proximity, his familiar scent and the knowledge that you had been wrong – he did indeed like you just the way you like him – makes you forget about all the other shit that happened today as you drift off to sleep, his steady and calm breathing and the soft voices on the tv lulling you to sleep.

Masterlist for all my könig fics <3

[once-upon-an-imagine]

You Keep Me Hangin' On - Steve Harrington

A/N: sooo, apparently it worked 😂😂😂 thank you to everyone who voted, I might keep this up since it helps me focus on a specific story😊 I mixed three different requests here so I really hope it makes sense, this one is mostly angsty but I am planning on a part two, so let me know what you think  

Requests - dawninparis​ asked: is this how you request something? i don’t know i’m a bit new to all this 😳 anyway i saw you were accepting st request so i was thinking maybe steve and reader are in an established relationship but with all the stuff happening in s4 and reader not being aware of all the supernatural stuff she gets jealous of all the time he spends with nancy and the fact he is hiding everything from you just to protect you and just basically a lot of angst (bc i like to suffer) and ending however u like even tho my heart is easily broken with sad endings 

- Anonymous asked: I would like to request a Steve story that takes place in season 4 where him and reader are dating already. Reader has noticed how awkward he has been around Nancy and vice versa. How they’ve been talking a lot more (good thing Eddie was there to keep them company😉). [full request here]  

- Anonymous asked: Hello babes, I'm not sure if you want to write this but may I request for a Steve Harrington angst to fluff fic? Haha! I just want to torture myself again with all these angsty stories. Somewhere around, reader is pining for steve and thought that she have a chance with steve but the latter thought that maybe he's still not over nancy. Reader felt hurt / embarassed by this and decided to date someone else, when she did steve realizes that she's the one that his heart has been longing for the whole time and not nancy. Thanks

Warnings: pretty angsty and Steve is kind of an asshole but also a jealous asshole xD and Jason (he deserves his own warning) let me know if I missed anything 

Disclaimer: I don’t own Stranger Things :) gif isn’t mine :D  

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

You Keep Me Hangin’ On

Set me free why don't you, babe Get out my life why don't you, babe 'Cause you don't really love me You just keep me hangin' on

You had known for a long time now. You had just, for some reason, held on to a stupid little hope that kept you hanging to this stupid little crush. Although it wasn't that little. And that voice in your head that kept you hanging sounded an awful lot like Robin insisting that Steve felt the same way you did.

You tried to believe her. You really did. Steve was very caring and affectionate towards you. You remembered the first time you drove him home, drunk, and he asked you to stay with him. And you did. And he said it felt nice to not wake up alone. And then, it became a natural thing between the two of you. He would call you whenever he needed you. And you would call him whenever you needed him. And he showed up. He always showed up. Which made you believe Robin when she said he felt the same way you did. But neither of you spoke about it. You hugged. You kissed. You did more than kiss. You couldn't imagine your life without him. But you weren't entirely sure if he could do the same. You feared that he could. He could live without you.

And right now, it was more evident than ever. You instantly dove into the water when he was pulled back into the lake. You pulled the bats off him and fought them with whatever you could find before Nancy, Robin, and Eddie also appeared to help. You were about to help him stop the bleeding right before Nancy ripped off the bottom of her blouse and started patching him up. And you saw it. You saw the way Steve looked at her.

"You're bleeding" you were snapped out of your thoughts when you heard Eddie by your side.

"Huh?" you asked, confused.

"Your arm" he pointed out. "It's bleeding" he repeated and you looked down to see that he was right. You hadn't even noticed. You were bleeding. Badly.

"Holy shit!" you panicked a little, not really knowing what to do.

"Here" he said, gently grabbing your hand and taking the black bandana out of his back pocket.

"Oh, I don't want to stain your bandana. I know that's your favorite one" you told him, not really noticing the smile that appeared on his face when you did.

"Don't be ridiculous, princess. It's just a piece of fabric" he insisted, grabbing your hand and cleaning your wound gently. You lifted your head from your arm to watch Eddie as he worked on tightening his bandana around you. You found yourself smiling a little at how careful he was being. He did not seem like the loud, careless guy you always saw in school. "How's that? Is it too tight?" he asked, worriedly.

"N-no. That's perfect" you smiled. "Thank you, Eddie" you told him.

"You know, it was pretty badass, w-what you did" he chuckled.

"It was?" you asked, feeling a little nervous for some reason. You never really thought of yourself as badass enough to get that credit from Eddie Munson, who you considered to be one of the most badass people you knew.

"Yeah, I mean, jumping in the lake and fighting those bats. That was metal, princess" he smirked.

"You also jumped in the lake and fought those bats, Eddie" you reminded him.

"Yeah, but after all of you ladies did" he insisted.

"Well, you still did" you told him. "And that says a lot" you smiled.

"So, uh" Eddie cleared his throat, pulling away from you a little. "This place is like Hawkins, but with monsters and nasty shit?"

"Yeah, pretty much" you nodded.

"Wait, watch out for the vines" Nancy said as Robin started walking around. "It's all a hive mind" she explained.

"It's all a what?" Robin asked.

"All the creepy crawlies around here" you told her. "They're, like, one or something" you told her. "Step on a vine, you're stepping on a bat" you instructed. "You're stepping on Vecna" you finished.

"Shit" Eddie said, next to you.

"But everything from our world is still here, right? Except people?" Robin asked.

"As far as I understand it, yeah" Steve said.

"So, theoretically, we could go to the police station and steal guns and grenades and whatever we need to blow up those bat things that are guarding the gate" Robin suggested.

"I highly doubt the Hawkins PD has grenades, Robin" you told her. "But guns, yeah, sure."

"Well, we don't have to go all the way downtown for guns" Nancy added and everyone looked at her. "I have guns in my bedroom" she shrugged.

"You, Nancy Wheeler" Eddie started. "...have guns, plural, in your bedroom?"

"Full of surprises, isn't she?" Robin asked, excitedly.

"A Russian Makarov and a revolver" Nancy explained.

"Yeah, you almost shot me with that one" Steve said.

"You almost deserved it" Nancy smirked back at him.

You tried to hide your upset expression but Eddie seemed to notice before he threw his jean vest at Steve and he glared back at him a little.

"For your modesty, dude" he said, making Steve roll his eyes before putting it on.

"Hey, are you okay?" Steve asked, walking closer to you.

"I'm fine" you said with a firm smile.

"Did you hurt yourself?" he questioned, looking at your arm.

"Yeah, but don't worry. Eddie fixed it" you told him.

"Oh" Steve said, not entirely loving that part. "O-okay" he sighed.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just a scratch" he said, trying to make you laugh.

You barely smiled before you followed Eddie and Robin who were climbing on trees and rocks, careful not to step on the vines. When Robin accidentally stepped on a vine, the five of you felt the Earth moving under you when an earthquake happened. Your instinct almost made you run to Steve, but you saw he quickly grabbed Nancy, who was closer to him, and he pulled her to his side. You couldn't even register the whole thing before you felt two arms grabbing you and making you fall to the ground with him as you felt Eddie's arms tighten around you.

"Holy shit!" you heard Robin, not so far from you.

"So guns seem like a pretty good idea to me" Eddie said.

"Yeah, me too" you said, feeling your cheeks burn a little at how close you were to the metalhead and not noticing a pair of eyes glaring your way. "Uh- um" you cleared your throat. "Thanks" you smiled shyly.

"Don't mention it, princess" he said, helping you up.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

As the five of you walked to the Wheeler's house, Steve could barely register what Nancy was telling him. His eyes were glued to Robin, you, and Eddie walking ahead of them. Specifically between you and Eddie Munson. He noticed he was trying to make you laugh because he could see the worried look on your face. And the worst part was that he was succeeding. He didn't like the feeling he got whenever you laughed at something Eddie Munson said. He didn't like that you had his bandana on your arm. He didn't like that he was walking a little too close to you and the worst part was when he saw his hand trying to reach for yours.

"Uh, yeah, Nance, hold on a second" he said, not even trying to understand what she was talking about as he ran over to the trio in front of him.

"Hey, Eddie" Steve said, catching up with you. "Uh, could I... talk to you?" he asked, making Eddie look at you a little confused. You simply shrugged and Robin pulled you away to go join Nancy instead, leaving the two boys behind.

"What's up, Harrington?"

"Hey, man. Uh... Listen, I just, uh... I just want to say thanks. For saving my ass back there" he smiled.

"Shit. You saved your own ass, man" Eddie told him. "I mean, that was a real Ozzy move you pulled back there!"

"Ozzy?"

"When you took a bite out of that bat. Ozzy Osbourne? Black Sabbath? He bit a bat's head off onstage" he explained as Steve looked at him confused.

"I don't-"

"You know? Doesn't matter" he shrugged. "It's very metal, what you did. That's all I'm saying" he told him.

"Thanks" Steve smiled.

"Henderson told me you were a badass. Insisted on the matter, in fact" he explained.

"Henderson said that?"

"Oh yeah" Eddie nodded.

"Shit!"

"Kid worships you, dude. Like, you have no idea. It's kinda annoying, to be honest" he mocked Steve. "I don't even know why I care what that little shrimp thinks, but, uh, guess I got a little jealous, Steve" he smirked. "I guess I couldn't accept the fact that Steve Harrington was actually a good dude. Rich parents, popular, chicks love him. Not a douche? No way, man. No way" he chuckled. "That, like, flies in the face of all the laws in the universe and my own personal Munson doctrine" he explained, making Steve laugh and roll his eyes a little. "Still super jealous as hell, by the way. Which is why I would never have jumped in that lake to save your ass. Not under any, uh... normal circumstances. Nope. Outside of D&D, I am no hero. I see danger and I just turn heel and run. Or at least that's what I've learned about myself this week" he muttered the last part.

"Give yourself a break, man" Steve insisted.

"See? The only reason I came in here was 'cause those ladies came in straight after you. Now, I was too ashamed to be the one who stayed behind" he explained. "But, your girl, right there" Eddie said, pointing at you, walking ahead of them. "She didn't waste a second. Not one second. She just dove right in" he told Steve as they stopped walking for a moment and Steve looked at you while you walked with Robin. "Now, I don't know what's going on or what happened between you two, but if I were you, I would not take her for granted, man. 'Cause that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen" he told her. "And if you let her go, someone else might not be so stupid" he informed him.

"Are you talking about... someone in specific?" Steve asked, glaring a little at him.

"Maybe" Eddie shrugged, patting his back. "I'm just saying, Harrington. Don't be the douche I always thought you were" he said before he walked away from Steve.

As soon as you all got to Nancy's place, she, Robin, and Eddie started making their way upstairs. You were about to follow them when Steve gently pulled you back.

"Hey" Steve said, smiling nervously at you, a few steps down. "Uh- I just... um, I wanted to ask if uh-" he said, running a hand through his hair as he always did when he was nervous. "If w-we're okay? I mean, are you- uh are you feeling okay?"

"Are you?" you asked, a little confused.

"No- yeah, uh I'm fine" he sighed. "I just wanted to check if you were also... fine?"

"I'm fine" you said with a firm smile before you turned around and you tried going upstairs but Steve stopped you again.

"It's just um... you got hurt" he said, stroking the back of your hand with his thumb as he looked at the bandana wrapped around your arm.

"So did you" you told him. "And I think yours is... much worse" you said, looking at Nancy's blouse wrapped around him.

"No, it's fine" he insisted.

"Great. So, you're fine. I'm fine. We're both..." you sighed. "Just fine" you said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked, frowning.

"Uh- nothing" you quickly said. "We should... get up there-"

"No, what did you mean by that?"

"Steve, this isn't the time or the place-"

"But you're upset!"

"No, I'm not, I just told you, everything is fine!" you insisted.

"Really? So, if everything is fine, why are you spending so much time with Munson?" Steve asked, accusingly.

"Ohh, you noticed that? I figured you'd be too busy with Nancy to even pay attention to anyone else!" you replied.

"Wait, is that what this is about?"

"No! I didn't mean to ugh-! Just... forget about it, okay? We have bigger things to-"

"Shhh!" he shushed you, holding up his finger.

"Um, excuse me?"

"Did you hear that?" he asked, looking the other way and walking away from you.

"Hear what?"

"Henderson!" he said, walking around the empty room.

"Well, it finally happened. He snapped" you muttered under your breath.

"HENDERSON!"

"What's going on?" Nancy asked, walking over to you with Robin, and Eddie.

"I don't know. He thinks he can hear Dustin-"

"I don't think! I can hear him! HENDERSON!"

And then, you heard it.

"Oh, my God! DUSTIN!"

"There has to be a way for them to hear us!" Eddie insisted as the five of you tried to look around the room.

"Wasn't there a way that Will communicated with Joyce when he was here?" Steve asked you, pointing his flashlight at the light in the middle of the living room.

"THE LIGHTS!"

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"You sure you're okay?"

"Yes, Robin, for the fifteenth time, I'm okay" you replied as you two tried to grab anything you could use at the War Zone.

"It's just that you and Steve have barely spoken since-"

"Since he decided to stay back at the UpsideDown because Nancy was cursed by Vecna and he now refuses to leave her side?" you snapped a little. "Sorry" you sighed. "There's just... a lot going on right now" you told her.

"I know that, but... well, you and Eddie on the other hand-"

"What?" you asked, confused.

"Come on, you can't tell me that there's nothing there-" she chuckled.

"There's literally nothing there" you laughed. "I don't think Eddie likes me that way" you rolled your eyes.

"Do you like him that way?" she asked, curiously.

"N-no" you said, nervously. "I don't know. Like I said, there's too much going on right now. And Eddie has been nice to me. He's always nice to me and... I don't know this isn't the time to focus on stupid guys, okay?"

"Love, it's never the time to focus on stupid boys" she laughed, making you laugh a little too but she quickly stopped when she spotted Vickie on the other side of the War Zone with her boyfriend.

"Rob" you said, feeling sorry and placing your hand on her arm.

"Have you ever felt like someone just ripped out your heart?" she asked, looking back at you.

You smiled sadly at her and then looked past her. "Yeah, I... have an idea" you said silently and she followed your stare to see Steve laughing with Nancy at something she had said. "Aw, well that's fun for me" you smiled, sarcastically. "I'm gonna go over there, okay?" you quickly said, walking away from Robin as she rolled her eyes and walked over to Steve, punching his arm.

"Ouch! What the hell, Buckley?!"

"Well, I wouldn't expect to find you here" you turned around hearing that dreadful voice.

"J-Jason" you said, nervously. "Yeah, well, it's just... scary times" you smiled. "Uh- I'm... sorry about Chrissy" you told him.

"Want my advice?" he asked, getting closer to you. "Shotguns are not good for much of anything past killing small birds" he said. "I mean, they got power, sure, but not much range" he said, as you stepped backwards, creating space between the two of you but he got even closer. "And that's just gonna force you into close-range combat, then someone can just grab that barrel like this..." he said, grabbing the weapon from you. "...and redirect it" he said, smiling, making you feel uneasy. "Well, you look nervous" he chuckled.

"Uh -like I said" you tried to smile. "Scary times" you told him. "Could you let go, please?"

"Sorry?"

"She said 'let go'" you heard Steve behind you and you let out a sigh of relief.

"Harrington" he said, letting go of the gun. "Didn't see you there" he said, stepping away.

"Well, now you do so..." Steve said, nodding his head so he would take the hint.

"Lovely seeing you" Jason said, before turning to look back at you.

"Hey, you okay-?"

"We need to go, now" you said, grabbing his hand.

"But-"

"But nothing" you said, pulling him with you. "Eddie's outside" you whispered.

"Right" Steve muttered a bit upset. Munson.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"Hey" you were snapped out of your thoughts when Eddie sat down on the grass, next to you.

"Hi" you smiled.

"So... I guess this is a dumb question but... how are you feeling?"

"Funny, I was just going to ask you the same thing" you smiled.

"Me? I'm having the time of my life, princess. Are you kidding me? We're about to go to the UpsideDown and fight for our lives, really... it's where I pictured my life at this point, he chuckled, making you laugh a little.

"You know, you don't have to do this, Eddie" you insisted.

"Are you trying to rob me of my hero arc, princess?" he said, making you laugh, which you didn't know how was possible with how anxious you were feeling. "I was just going to tell you the same thing" he told you.

"It's just... you've been through a lot in like... what, 48 hours?"

"Yeah, it's been intense but... well, you being here kinda makes it better" he admitted.

"It does?" you asked, feeling your cheeks burn.

"Yeah" he insisted. "I mean, if... it were up to me, I wouldn't want the situation of us hanging out to be in a creepy world fighting this... monster but... I guess it's pretty badass" he chuckled.

"Well, if it involves you I would assume it would have to be badass" you smiled, making him blush a little. "So... if it were up to you... what would the situation be? U-us hanging out?"

"Well- uh-"

"Hey, Munson!" Steve said, suddenly appearing and interrupting the two of you. "Um... Henderson's asking for you" he said.

"Um- sure" Eddie said, looking back at you. "Sorry, princess. Raincheck?"

"Sure" you smiled as he got up and he helped you up too. "See you in a bit" you told him before Steve replaced his place.

"What was that?"

"What was what?" you asked, confused.

"You and Munson?"

"We were just talking" you shrugged.

"Is there something going on between the two of you?"

"What? What are you talking about, Steve?"

"I just find it interesting that every time I look at you he just happens to be there" he said, glaring at you a little.

"Well, maybe we were just talking about our part of the plan, since you made me stay back with him and Dustin!"

"I knew you were upset about that! Nancy and I just decided this was the best way to make the teams!"

"Oh, what a lovely coincidence that you get to go with Nancy!"

"And Robin!" he added. "Why does that make you so upset? Because you don't get to come and physically kill Vecna with us? I need you to stay back with Eddie and Dustin!"

"Why? Because you don't trust me as much as Nancy!? You don't-" you stopped yourself before you could say 'You don't love me as much as you love Nancy'.

"Nancy knows what she's doing!"

"Oh, and I don't? We were all down there, Steve! And in case you didn't notice, I was the first one to jump when you were dragged back into that lake! Not Nancy! I am just as capable as she is-!"

"I didn't say you weren't but I just..." he sighed, running a hand through his hair, frustrated. "I need you to stay back with Dustin and Eddie okay?"

"Fine!" you said, reluctantly. "I can't do this anymore Steve" you sighed.

"Sweetheart, I know it'll be hard, but we have this plan and-"

"No, not that! This!" you said pointing at him and yourself. "I am tired of just being your option when Nancy is not around!"

"That's not true and this isn't the time to-"

"Right... it's never the time" you sighed.

"Well, not when we're about to go face Vecna in the fucking UpsideDown!"

"You're going to face Vecna with Nancy and Robin! I'm staying back with Eddie and Dustin!"

"That's not how it is!"

"Yes, it is! That's the plan that you two came up with! Together!"

"Look, what do you want from me? It made more sense this way!"

"Just admit that you still have feelings for Nancy and be done with it so I can just... I don't know, move on!"

"M-move on? From us?"

"There is no us, Steve! Is there?"

"Why would you say that?"

"I don't know, Steve! I'm tired! I'm tired and I can't do this anymore! It's not fair!"

"Ugh! I'm not trying to make you feel like this on purpose! I don't have feelings for Nancy, okay? Why does everyone think that I still have feelings for Nancy?"

"Oh, really? Everyone thinks so? So, I'm not the only one then!" you said, feeling your heart starting to break.

"No! I didn't mean it like that! Nancy is my friend! Okay! That is it! I care about her and I don't want her to die!"

"Nobody wants her to die, Steve! But you keep following her around like a lost puppy-!"

"How would you even know since you decided to stay with Munson every chance you get?! I can't believe you're being this dramatic over Nancy. SHE'S MY FRIEND!" he snapped. "Look, I don't want to fight with you, we are all on edge, and... I just... I need to do this, and I need you to stay with Dustin and Munson!"

"I don't want to fight with you either, Steve, and I know this is probably the worst possible time, I just-"

"Hey, guys!" Dustin shouted, interrupting you. "Time to go!"

Steve sighed, tiredly and looked back at you, not really knowing what else to say, so you did.

"You know what? You're right, we have more important things to deal with right now" you smiled with tears in your eyes and you placed your hand on his arm. You were about to follow Dustin but Steve pulled you back, pulling your hand.

"Listen, I care about Nancy, yes. Of course, I do. But, I swear, she's just my friend" he told you. "And I care about you too. I do, a lot" he said, nervously. But something wasn't letting you believe him anymore.

"As a friend?" you asked, with your voice breaking a little.

"It's... complicated" he said, making your heart break into little pieces. "And I swear we'll talk about it, after this, I just-" he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

Something was telling you that he would never love you as he did Nancy. That little voice was becoming louder than Robin's telling you he loved you just as you loved him. And you felt your eyes watering. And you knew he could see it, but he didn't say anything. Because you knew time was running out and you had to follow Dustin. So you just smiled sadly at Steve and cupped his cheek with your hand.

"I love you, Steve" you whispered, having the strangest feeling in your heart that this may be the only chance you would get to tell him this, so you kissed his cheek. Like you always did and you gave him the saddest smile Steve had ever seen on someone. "And I really hope you get her back someday."

To Be Continued

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

[Part 2] 

A/N: sooo, I am definitely not evil enough to just leave it there :D this is definitely going to have a part two... so let me know what you think xD (and also, who you think she should stay with) 

[aziraphales-library]

Hello :D ! love the work that's being done here! could yall recommend some angsty touch-starved aziraphale fics? happy ending though, i cant bear to have him be sad at the end 😔

Hi! We have a #touch starved tag, so make sure to check that. Here are some angsty touch-starved Aziraphale fics to add...

Our Touch Through Time by oddityofstars (G)

Over the years, Aziraphale started to notice how lovely Crowley was, and how much he longed for him to be his. - Or, a realization over time through touch and small moments, Good Omens style.

and instructions for dancing by astrhae (M)

Aziraphale stood from his seat. He stood, abrupt, and there, in the small, stained aisle of the bus, he knelt. Knee, against dented metal. Knee, against rusted hope. And he reached out, until his hand found Crowley’s – until they both flinched at the open cut of touch. ----------- “And they aren’t talking.” ----------- Or, three car rides in silence, and one bus ride in hope. (Featuring an elevator, the Bentley, a train, and making out in a bus. Sort of. That's not the point. The point was: The elevator jerked to a stop. Crowley jolted forward, and instinct – carved deeper than light – forced Aziraphale forward to catch him. Hand, against elbow. Hand, against open wound.)

A Hug a Day by EdosianOrchids901 (T)

Crawley doesn’t really like to be touched. But when he realizes that Aziraphale needs physical contact, he does his best to oblige. Can they find a balance between too much touch and too little?

The Place You Don’t Belong (you do) by MagpieWords (G)

After the apocalypse doesn't happen again, Aziraphale tries and fails and tries again to repair things with Crowley. The human words for emotions are confusing and complicated, but so worthwhile. Inspired by Almost Heaven by Jeremiah Lloyd Harmon.

Touch my Tears with Your Lips by IneffableDoll (T)

In Heaven, there was nothing to touch. Aziraphale re-tied the knot of his bowtie again and again and again. He was alone, and nothing was real, and he was alone, and nothing was real. * The emptiness of Heaven is punishment itself, a torture for a very Earthly angel. He has no power. The Metatron lied to him. Crowley is somewhere else. Aziraphale is alone. When he eventually escapes back to Earth – where he belongs – Aziraphale and Crowley have a lot to work through, even after averting the Second Coming, a renewed attempt at taking away all they hold dear. They need to be gentle with each other’s fragile, fractured hearts and together, figure out how to love one another the way they’ve long wished to. A story of trauma, healing, and love. So, so much love.

There's a Special Place on Earth for Beings Like You by Kipje (T)

Set two years after Aziraphale leaves to become Supreme Archangel. It’s the Second Coming. Aziraphale is tasked with finding parents for the new Christ and returns to earth. He needs Crowley’s help, but the two haven’t spoken since the break-up. Crowley doesn’t want to forgive the angel, nor does he want to help out with the baby, but he finds it incredibly hard not to get involved. OR Aziraphale and Crowley raise the new Christ together; a girl named Eden. While they try to sort out their feelings and avert the apocalypse. Excerpt: Crowley had always assumed Aziraphale would want to run away with him in order to be together. He had never bothered to ask if there was a version where they would be an ‘us’ on earth. What was Aziraphale supposed to do once they arrived in the Alpha Centauri system. How would that even work with his book collection? Sure, Aziraphale had fallen in love with the demon – and it had taken him a while to be able to admit that – but he had also fallen in love with humanity, with earth. He had never planned on leaving. He knew earth would be no fun without his favourite wily serpent, but that did not mean he would be fine anywhere as long as Crowley was there. He had standards.

- Mod D

[serverusslaype]

Special

just a random short angsty, sort of fluffy one-shot, Severus Snape x professor!reader

i just wrote this right now because im in an angsty sort of mood, and i wanted to post something. i miss you guys, and i am now currently writing part 14 to shameless!! woo!! that break did my brain well. i feel refreshed hehe. <3 thank you for giving me some tips on how to get rid of that godforsaken writer's block, good lord. i hated it. but i'm free now, until next time ;)

this is a drabble/one-shot so it's sort of vague-ish, so yeah, if there's any mistakes or anything i'm sorry. ;(

(i also didn't put the taglist since it isn't part of the shameless fic! just in case you wondered!)

warnings: mentions of cheating

"If it makes you stop crying," Snape began hesitantly as he stared at your tear-stained face, frowning with a scrunched nose of what seemed like disgust. "We can go back to my office, and I'll make you some tea." He said, shoulders rising and falling slowly as he sighed. Watching you be so sad and cry wasn't something Snape was fond of, and it was effecting him - more than he wanted to admit. He just hoped you'd accept his request of making you some tea, then perhaps he could figure out what was making you so upset, and punish the culprits. Snape had always had a little soft-spot for you ever since you'd joined Hogwarts as a professor a year or so ago. Usually he didn't feel such a way towards younger, new professors, however, your kind and sweet aura had him unexpectedly mesmerised the moment you'd introduced yourself to him. The Potions Master wasn't exactly sure why he felt this way towards you so soon, but he knew it couldn't be good - the last time he felt something like this was back when he was a child.

You looked up, still sobbing quietly, managing to slip a confused frown upon your face. "Tea?" You repeated quietly with a sniffle, pausing for a moment to ponder on Snape's offer. "...Tea would be nice."

You hadn't expected to bump into your usually gloomy, rude colleague whilst having what you thought was going to be a private breakdown after learning that your partner had cheated on you with your best friend. Almost two years down the drain, just like that. Snape had accidentally walked in on you hunched over your desk, crying hopelessly. He was about to walk away when you'd heard a deep sigh, startling you. And here you were. Being offered tea by him.

"Let's go then." Snape said with a flat tone, looking away from your sad eyes, unable to withstand the pain that was gathering in his chest.

You were at least two or three cups of tea down when you'd finally explained everything to Snape. From the start of your relationship to the unexpected demise. It dug up old, painful memories, and you were crying again.

"What's wrong with me?" You sobbed, taking another sip of the tea that Snape had made you; hot tears soaking your cheeks and dripping into the cup. Another deep, frustrated sigh slipped from Snape again as he watched you from his desk with a sad frown upon his pale features. "I don't get it," you sniffled, gripping the handle of the tea cup with white knuckles, "did I do something wrong?"

No, you couldn't do anything wrong, Snape wanted to say. He wanted to tell you how wrong you were, and how perfectly good you truly were. But he knew you wouldn't listen, and so he kept quiet, only muttering in disagreement.

"I doubt that, Y/N." Snape mumbled, though you didn't give him much time to say anything else before you stumbled into a self-deprecating rant.

"Maybe I wasn't worth it, I mean, it's not like I'm anything... special," you laughed dryly, avoiding Snape's cold eyes, "maybe I'm just the girl that everyone dates before they find their true love. I'm the girl that they use to find the one, I don't have any good qualities, I'm a pushover, and-"

Snape inhaled sharply, "Stop it, Y/N!" He bellowed, slamming a hand down on the desk that the two of you were sat at. Instantly, you went silent, your mouth hanging open in shock as your heartbeat suddenly sped into an incredibly fast pace. You glanced up at Snape with wet and wide eyes, startled by his unusual outburst.

"Severus-"

"No, Y/N," he held up a hand, silencing you, "you're wrong about yourself. You are special." Snape sighed, moving his hand to massage his temples. You couldn't believe what was coming out of this man's mouth. "You're more than enough. Your ex was clearly a fool to do such a thing to you. In fact, I can't fathom why they would choose your friend over you." Snape said with a stern tone, clearly distressed. Your mouth still hung open as you stared at him, flabbergasted. "You're kind, sweet, considerate, and your heart is twice the size than it should be."

"I..." You uttered quietly, staring at Snape, evidently speechless. He shut his eyes momentarily, suddenly realising what he'd just said. Yet another deep sigh slipped from his heaving chest, rendering you silent.

"You..." Snape stumbled, avoiding your eyes. There was no way he could look at you right now. He'd just opened the floodgates on what he truly thought of you. He probably looks like a right blithering idiot.

The room went quiet, and the two of you sat there in what felt like a somewhat-comfortable silence, taking the moment to acknowledge what had just happened.

You stared at the man opposite you, a sudden and unusual warmth blooming in your chest. For the first time since you'd met him, you took the opportunity to truly look at him. Snape's black eyes glittered in the low, soft amber light from his candles as he reluctantly glanced up at you, pressing his lips into an awkward thin and flat line. His shoulders rose a tad, tensing as he inhaled, and he shifted his gaze to the desk again. Clearly, he was unsure on how to navigate this current moment.

A tiny smile picked at the corners of your lips as you looked at him. "Thank you." You whispered, glancing down at his splayed out hands. Taking a chance, you reached out your own hand and placed it atop of one of his, feeling it flinch. Snape's eyes darted up to yours, and he returned your smile, though it seemed a little awkward.

Snape didn't say anything to you, he only nodded gently before pulling his hand back to himself after a few long moments, clearing his throat.

"Well, since you've stopped crying," he began, sitting up straight in his chair, "we can assume I've done a good job." A little chuckle escaped you, and it caused a loose, genuine smile to erupt on Snape's face. You noticed it, but chose not to say anything, instead silently admiring how well it suited him.

"Now I know who to come to when I'm sad." You joked lightly, and as quickly as the smile had arrived on his lips, it disappeared. You laughed, feeling a tad lighter. Though the awful situation still sat within you like a dead weight, waiting to be dealt with, it felt good to smile and laugh, especially with a man you thought to be devoid of such emotions.

"I don't think-"

"Thanks, Severus." You cut him off with a bright smile, making his heart flutter. Perhaps he would wander past your classroom a little more often than before.

Masterpost

[smehur]

Some Harry/Draco Fic Recs

There is so much great fic in this fandom, I'm struggling to keep track of everything I read and like. I already mentioned some of my early favorites here, but I have since found several more.

In no particular order:

Hermione Granger's Hogwarts Crammer for Delinquents on the Run by waspabi

In which Harry did not go to Hogwarts, but is instead found by a group of seventh year students led by Hermione, and recruited for the war at the ripe age of 17.

I'm not usually a fan of AUs, but this charmed me within the first few paragraphs with irresistible characterization. Harry is a little different than how I imagine him, but the premise allows for it. And the Harry/Draco romance is possibly the sweetest, softest I've seen so far. 10/10 would read again.

In Pieces by dysonrules

Harry returns to Hogwarts as the new DADA instructor, only to find his teaching efforts thwarted by a very familiar ghost.

When I got this rec myself, I wasn't sure I would like it, because, well, the summary spells it out, doesn't it? But I ended up loving it. It's incredibly sweet and tender and sad and hot. I couldn't put it down.

An Emerald In The Sky by corvuscrowned

The hardest part about shagging an Unspeakable is that they’re not allowed to speak of anything. All Draco knows is that Harry works in Time. Harry works in Time, and while he’s out there in all of that time, it is as unforgiving to him as it is to anyone. Somewhere along the way, Draco realizes he's been thinking in lines, when he should have been thinking in circles.

This story moved me like few others. It's a masterpiece of 'show, don't tell' in that elusive way I have never been able to tap in my own writing. It speaks in images, and the images capture incredibly specific, perfectly chosen details that paint years and decades of slowly fading hope. Just the thing for one who considers their own aging and mortality increasingly often.

Take You Home by lq_traintracks (lumosed_quill)

Everybody’s a little fucked up after the war, Draco especially. What starts as hate sex after a night out, eventually turns into something else, something more like comfort. And even though his friends all tell Harry he’s just being used, all Harry’s doing is making sure Draco gets home in one piece. He’s not falling helplessly in love.

From the author of one of my early favorites (Right Hand Red), a hugely enjoyable read that makes love to a post-war Draco (and his long hair in a man-bun that he fastens with his wand). I gulped this down in one sitting.

Hey, Potter by SunseticMonster

Harry returns to Hogwarts for his 8th year, determined not to let Malfoy get to him. But when the snarky teasing starts up again, Harry finds that returning the jibes with compliments has a far more interesting outcome.

I am in love with this premise. It works so well? While I wished for a bit more shipping and a bit less collateral, I still enjoyed this story immensely and went on to read almost everything the author wrote for the pairing.

An Issue of Consequence by Faith Wood

Draco has woken up in an alternate universe. Or he has woken up utterly insane. Nothing else can possibly explain why Harry Potter suddenly seems to think he's Draco's boyfriend.

The light-hearted summary belies the gravity of the plot of yet another favorite tale from the pen of my favorite author. The POV immersion is so deep that I absolutely did not see the resolution of the mystery until it was revealed, and then I was just as shocked as Draco. Fabulous stuff.

A Doll's Tale by Faith Wood

Harry/Draco, as observed by Draco's childhood doll. Please note, this doll is very self-absorbed.

This... broke me a little, lol. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing (too) heavy, angsty or dark about this story. It's as innocent as they get? But it just clicked so well with the idea I've been brewing in my own (yet to be published) writings, of Draco as this... sensitive boy hiding under the guise of confidence and cruelty. And the plot-twist, Merlin. Was it obvious? Maybe, but not to me! It struck me like a (fluffy toy) train and days later, I'm still recovering. I want to take this fic and hug it when I go to sleep.

Actually, I'm in a bit of a pickle, as my instinct is to list pretty much every single thing written by Faith Wood that I've read so far. But that would be silly, so I'll list only one more, as a treat.

Beholden by Faith Wood

Draco Malfoy might not be a killer, but it turns out he's an effective painkiller. If stopping pain was all Draco's touch did, things might not be so complicated, but either way Harry can't afford to be choosy.

I already mentioned this one in that inaugural post I linked at the very top, but: 1) it's now completed and can be safely binged on; and 2) the only thing I said about it back then is that it deals with chronic pain, which was particularly relevant at the time because I was at the peak of sciatica and could relate to poor Harry all too well. But that's just one of the many merits of this incredible story. Now that I'm feeling better, I'd praise it first and foremost for the patient exploration of the characters' inner worlds and the gradual, methodical and inexorable buildup of their feelings and convictions that eventually leads to falling in love. A masterpiece of slow burn. I plan not only to read this again, but to study it in the hopes of improving my own craft.

Tagging the authors I found on here: @dysonrules @faith2wood @corvuscrowned @lqtraintracks and also my friend @kuraiummei who helped me find some of these gems.

Thank you for enriching my life. ❤️

[foreverisntenough]

- YOU’RE MINE -

Summary: While you daydreamed about his face an ocean apart, he had no idea what yours was about to do to him. With a twist of fate and the heat of summer, a new relationship would completely ransack his heart - Everyday heavy with the thought of one another, neither of you were going to let the unexpected love of your life go. You were going to be his, you were his, and you were going to stay his.

Warnings: This series contains fluff, suggestion, smut (unprotected sex,) pregnancy, love bombing, occasionally sad, kind of angsty, alcohol consumption - not sure what else really… if i miss anything please lmk!

Note: I hope you like it! THE FINAL CHAPTER 🥺 Start reading ‘Ours’ the sequel of this fic! It will chronical what happens in Trent and Y/N’s lives after this part!

INDEX

Chapter 30 - ‘You’re Mine’

The sun bathed your room in morning light. You yawned and opened your eyes slowly pulling Trent’s pillow over for you to hug. It was early but you had a plan to run to the shops before he got home. You felt absolutely exhausted yet again despite copious amounts of sleep so you hopped in the shower to help yourself wake up. Even just picking up products made your arms ache. Your limbs barely moved so you ended the shower with 30 seconds of cold water. Jesus, did that wake you up. You stared at yourself naked in the mirror before wrapping yourself in a towel. As you looked at your slender frame you couldn’t help but wonder what was going to change. How much would change? You tucked the towel moving on from your introspective questions and washed your face. You started your skincare moving slow through serums and onto a moisturizer, product after product. It felt good to take a moment to take care of yourself. You felt like you had to look good today so this was a good start. Trent probably preferred you with no makeup but makeup made you feel more confident so you did some, applying blush, mascara, all the things that made you feel just the best version of yourself. You moisturized your whole body before spraying a Le Labo perfume you had been loving recently and made your way to the walk in wardrobe. You didn’t know what to wear though so you made a mess pulling everything out, trying to figure it out. You combed through piles of clothes and rack more it felt endless but you were getting tired again. You landed on a light pink sweat set. It wasn’t exactly groundbreaking but it was cute.You didn’t want to be in real clothes and you didn’t really want to be anything close to sexy so this worked. You meticulously cleaned your closet back up, putting each item exactly where it belonged. You grabbed a pair of Louis Vuitton sneakers to throw on before you left the house but needed to pick up the bedroom a little before you headed downstairs. Once you did you slipped on your sneakers and grabbed your car keys to exit out through the garage. You jumped into one of the big blacked out cars in there and made your way into town. To get started on your long list of errands to do to prepare for Trent’s arrival you began at a stationary store then off to the bakery, and into a few more shops. The more things you pulled together the more excited you got. For the first time since you found out you actually were excited to tell him. Although, you wanted to keep the way you told him simple. That was your vibe, calm, easy, so you grabbed a little something you were planning to place the pregnancy test in and some cardstock for a note. You went and got food to eat in hopes for after he took the news well and you snuck off to some more luxury stores for something fun you’d give him a little later but that would be a surprise all depending on what his response was. It felt like your car was full by the time you were heading back home. Trent let you know he was coming home around noon so around 11:30 your anxiety really began to hit. You felt like you were shaking as you held a pen over the nice piece of cardstock you got. You wrote a simple note and left it on the kitchen island for him to find when he came in.

‘Come upstairs, daddy xx’

It was humorous and ultimately would be cute once he found out why you said that. In retrospect, the word was really what kickstarted the whole conversation about the possibility of a baby. It was around 12:15 when you finally heard the front door open. You heard his bags drop by the front door the way that drove you crazy but you pushed it aside for the moment unable to focus on anything but listening to his footsteps deducing where he was in the house. Your heart began to race, your mind shifting into overdrive.

“Babyyy?!” Trent called out loud from downstairs but you didn’t respond. You let him find his way. He eventually went to the kitchen and saw the note. He knew you were home, your car was there, you said you would be so he picked up the card you had left and smirked. In Trent’s mind this was a cheeky welcome home. He read the card as an invitation to go upstairs to have some incredible sex after he had been gone. A sort of congratulations he scored a great goal. It wouldn’t have been the first time you’d done something like this but boy was he wrong. He didn’t even click that the word ‘daddy’ wasn’t even remotely there sexually. He jogged up the stairs eagerly chuckling to himself excited for what was going to happen. His mind was jumping around trying to imagine what you’d be wearing, what he’d ideally want you to be wearing. He felt greedy like a little kid in a candy store imagining all the different bits of lingerie you’d worn over the years. He pulled himself together a little bit trying to act cool and suave before he opened the door. God, he hoped it was that pink one but his hunger was dulled. Everything slowed as he looked into your bedroom. The room was warmly lit, all the lights on, it was clean and organized, cream and white colors that made the space comfy and homey, the bed was made perfectly and to further his confusion there he saw you sat crossed legged on the boucle bench at the end of your bed. You had stayed in your light pink sweats and the soft light almost managed to illuminate you. You picked your head up and thought your heart could fall out of your chest. You gave him a soft but very nervous smile. You couldn’t shake your anxiety but there was a part of you that also couldn’t help but feel a little excited seeing him. Just him being back home was enough to make you giddy but this was a new emotion you didn’t know and it was overwhelming you. You stared up at him trying to fight back tears you could feel building. You almost forgot how beautiful he was, you could only dream your baby looked just like him. That face started to make you nervous about what it would fall to because you were about to change his life. Contrary to what he thought, Trent wasn’t even disappointed you weren’t in some lingerie on the bed to be honest. You looked absolutely ethereal sitting there. His angel. Your one hand hiding a little white box behind your back, the other anxiously pulling at the bottom of some strands of hair. “What’s going on…” he hesitantly asked, stepping into the room. You gestured your head to the side signaling for him to come over to you and so he did. Albeit, incredibly slowly. He stood in front of you looking down. You remained quiet. You thought if you spoke you’d start crying immediately so in an effort to not do that you pulled the box from behind you and handed it up to him. He took it and inspected the blankness of it and then looked back at you inquisitively with a smile. He held the sturdy but small white box wrapped with a white ribbon having no idea what was inside of it.

“Go on…” you managed to quiver out in a whisper. At that moment, you were pretty sure the world stopped turning. He pulled the ribbon untying the bow, holding onto it while he lifted the lid off agonizingly unhurried. You felt your leg start to bounce with nerves awaiting his reaction. You watched his face intently for any sign of emotion. His mouth was agape a little, his eyes batted trying to make sure he was actually seeing what he thought he was. He looked into the box completely unexpressive. Inside the little white box laid a comforting bed of thin white and metallic shredded paper with the positive pregnancy test resting a top of it. In slow motion you watched the box fall from his now shaking hands onto the floor. The neat and carefully filled box now scattered on your carpet.

“Are you serious?” He said sternly with no emotion on his face. You thought you might pass out starting to think he didn’t want this anymore now that it was real but you nodded anyway telling him that this was in fact happening. This was very real.

“There are two more positive ones in there.” You pointed to the bathroom sheepishly. Trent dropped to the floor falling into a crouching position. He squatted leaning back on his heels. With his head in his hands you could hear him start to sniffle and his breath start to deepen. “T… I.. I’m” you tried to talk but honestly you were petrified and had no clue what to say. Should you apologize? But before you could come up with something he picked his head up to look at you. His eyes all wet, he gave you the sappiest closed mouth smile that almost had the look of a pout to it.

“Oh my fucking god, Y/N… Y/N” He whined with the deepest set puppy dog eyes that broke your heart. You could see tears roll down his face, he got on his knees and crawled over to you wrapping his arms around your waist dropping his head into your lap. “Sorry, Jesus” he laughed a little, shaking his head, nuzzling into you. “I just didn’t… oh my god, baby… is this for real?” He whimpered out kissing your covered stomach. You were taking his physical actions as a positive but had to know for sure, his words weren’t exactly concretely assured.

“You wanted this right? Like me pregnant? Like we are having a baby” You cooed, giggling a little. It was the first time you had said that. ‘We are having a baby.’ You felt a few tears roll down your own cheeks as you stroked your hand over his hair comforting him as he clung to you.

“You have no idea baby.” He muffled into your sweatshirt top before raising it some. He beamed looking at you. He kissed the warm bare skin of your stomach. “Holy shit, I’ve never been so happy in my entire life.” He continued kissing you. “This is fucking insane.”

“Yeah?” You kept giggling. He pulled off your stomach and looked into your eyes. He held your hands and squeezed them tightly .

“C’mere” he whispered. You watched his perfect lips you were praying your baby inherited from him move closer to you. His lips pressed into yours. They were warm and soft. Warmth blossomed in your chest. Your lips brushed over one anothers. The smell of him, the smell of home was dizzying. You leaned further into the kiss as his lips felt somehow even impossibly softer than before against your own. You both started laughing in delirium though having to pull away. You let go of his hands and cupped his cheeks holding his face some distance from yours to really look at him. His big brown eyes had fallen into deep pools. You wiped your thumbs underneath them, wiping away the tears that had fallen. He looked at you like no one else in the world existed. Trent stared into your eyes and felt that no one else existed in the world, in fact you were his entire world and he was most definitely yours.

“Gonna take care of you forever. This is unreal. We’re having a baby. Jesus, You're perfect, beautiful.” Trent just kept yapping away stunned and so you let him ramble on and on as his hands caressed all over your body. He picked you up and sat you up on the edge of the bed before he came and crawled over you. You laid back with a big childish smile. He looked down at your face and exposed stomach and his heart faltered. His hands pressed into the mattress next to you letting his arms prop him up over you. He dropped his head to come in for another kiss. And another kiss. His lips feeling absolutely addicting. You started to makeout and his body pressed down onto yours. He didn’t know when he got so hard but you weren’t going to call him out. Things started to heat up but he got nervous. “Can I do this?” He said pulling away from you a little sliding his hands under your sweatshirt over your stomach and up towards your boobs. You nodded with a little giggle. “I promise I’ll be so gentle with you, baby.” He whispered. You could only laugh.

“T... it’s okay, we can.” You looked at him ferociously innocently. He never felt more in love with you. He almost felt lightheaded. He was so happy with the news and then now the fact that you were carrying his child, god, he was so turned on.

“Okay… still gonna be gentle with you though. Precious cargo, no?” You both giggled before you pulled him down to you. The space between you vanished. He pressed his lips to yours. His one hand cupped your cheek, gently as promised. He moved you up the bed and sat back taking his shirt off. Your eyes gazed over every inch of him. He was heavenly looking. His body was just drool worthy but you snapped out of your lust when you caught the soft smile on his face looking down at you.

“Help, baby.” You cooed cutely pulling at your top. You sat up some and he helped you take the sweatshirt and your shirt with it off over your head. You laid back and lifted your hips up some for him to then pull your joggers off. He left you in your bra and panties, which okay, this morning you made a conscious effort to pick a particular good set that you knew he liked. Trent couldn’t help his eyes from racking over you greedily. He couldn’t even count the amount of times he had seen your naked body. It was infinite but this felt like the very first time. It was nothing like the time years ago in New York though, this was different, this was love in its very purest form. He absolutely worshiped your body. It did so much for him before, his brain was confused how you possibly were able to do more I.e. carry his child now but also how it was physically possible for him to be any more attracted to you, and yet here he was. His pupils dilated looking down at you. He pulled his sweats off leaving you with the perfect view of his hardened cock’s bulge in his boxers. Both of your heart rates speeding up. He got on top of you again as you began to kiss more and more, hotter and heavier. He dragged his fingers over your body while he moved away from your kiss to come whisper in your ear. His hands gently slipped into your panties and in no time he was slowly pumping his fingers in and out of you purposely rubbing his palm against your clit rhythmically.

“Oh god T… Trent fuck, baby. T…” You moaned trying to push yourself up into him for more friction, for him to go deeper.

“Keep saying my name, baby. Such a good girl f’me, gonna make you feel so good like you deserve.” His warm breath hit your ear sending a shiver down your spine. And, boy, was he determined to make you feel good. He kissed down from your ear all the way down to your core. He pulled your soaked panties off as he continued with his fingers. His name still falling from your mouth. He worked quickly and buried his face into your wet pussy. His tongue toyed with your clit as his fingers diligently worked in and out of you. You were a mess. You couldn’t think straight but it was all so smooth, so caring, so soft, so intentional. It definitely was intentional, he knew exactly what he was doing when you felt the tight knot in your stomach snap pulsating around his fingers. “Did so good.” He muttered into your pussy. The vibration causing you to flinch at the overstimulation. He pulled his face covered in your slick away kissing the inside of your thighs letting you come down for a moment. It wasn’t long before he was fucking into you nice and slow. He filled you up and you felt every single inch of him sliding in and out of you.

“Baby… I’m so full. Oh my god. I love your cock so much.” You moaned beautifully and he smirked. Your words were starting to almost slur from the amount of pleasure you were in as his hand reached down to rub small circles on your already sensitive clit. Your pussy dripping onto the sheets below you as he continued to carefully roll his hips up into you. Trent affectionately yapped away, continuing to spill out how much he loved you, how good you were doing, how beautiful you were all falling from his lips nonstop as he enjoyed the feeling of you. “I want you to fuck me like this forever.” You babled back words muffled by moans and kisses. Your hands came and gripped onto his muscular arms. Your hands pressed back into the pillows feeling fuzzy, blanking out everything but the feeling of him inside you. “I’m gonna cum, T” you cried out “I’m so close.” You felt the know in your stomach tighten again. Your breathing getting heavier. You moved your hands up to his face pulling him into a passionate kiss and then letting your manicured fingers gripping onto his hair, enough to make him whisper at the sensation.

“Cum for me, baby” he cooed between kisses as his hard cock pulsating inside of you. “I love you so much, baby. Keep fucking me. Doing so good.” Your sweet moaning of his name pushed him closer and closer to his own edge. “You sound so pretty, baby” Trent smiled down at your face. You looked up at him mouth agape, watery eyes and were taken aback by how beautiful he looked above you. God, he really was perfect. He kissed you again. The drag of his cock in and out of you made you each for anything to hold on to. Switching between the sheets, his hair, then to his muscular back. His hand found its way to your tits. he caressed it, playing with your nipple while fucking you.

“Ah T… you feel so good. Too much.” You whined feeling him pressed deeper and deeper inside of you. Slow and languid you said it but you didn't want him to stop at all. He knew that too.

“You’re doing so good. Such a good girl” he praised, starting to feel overwhelmed by the pleasure from your pussy. He was close now. To be fair, he had been close to cumming since he ate you out. Watching you orgasm with his tongue on your clit was just the perfect sight. “Cum with me, baby, yeah?” His movements were getting sloppy compared to the perfect pace he had kept at as his abs tensed. His lips parted in deep breaths as his eyes rolled back.White hot pleasure flashed behind your eyes and Trent’s lips pushed against yours as he fucked you through your high. His hips finally stuttered and he paused letting him cum fill you, making sure every drop of him was inside of you, where it belonged. He quickly resumed pushing his hips into you though with a groan of your name. His cock twitched inside you, spent. It was intoxicating, everything was, the way your arms were wrapped tight around his shoulders. Pulling him close, running soothingly along his skin as he collapsed onto you with a final, fucked-out thrust. He traced his fingers lazily along your side, neither of you having enough strength to bother moving. All is quiet in your little haven, and you could almost fall asleep. You laid stuck to each other's bodies for ages. Trent’s hands continuing to slowly caress your body as you cuddled up to him. Your head rested onto his shoulder. He looked down at you and smiled.

“How did you get so perfect, hmm?” He cooed with his hand coming to rest over your stomach. You giggled and looked back at him. His smile made your heart beat a little faster than it already was. “Just so pretty all the time, it’s insane.” He kept talking while he squeezed your waist. “Going to be the most beautiful mummy.”

“Stop…T” You feigned embarrassment. “Well, you can say goodbye to all this now I guess though.” You drudged out waving your hand over your naked body pressed into his. It kind of stung thinking about how much your body was about to change. You had a lot of issues with your image from the jump so to imagine things changing and potentially getting worse than they were now freaked you out.

“Baby, baby, baby… don’t do that. This is so fucking amazing. You’re going to be beautiful before, during, and after, you’re so fucking beautiful.” He cooed again, dropping his hand sliding down to palm your ass. “Trust me, if anything you’re only about to get even sexier.” He squeezed your ass cheek saying that.

“Yeah, yeah you say that now.” You groaned. “You’re just excited for when my tits inevitably get bigger.”

“I’m not just saying it! I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little excited for that, you're right….But baby, it’s not about all that. It’s the fact that you’re beautiful for carrying our child, you know how insane that is?” You nuzzled your face into his body hiding feeling a little shy. You laid there while he ranted on and on about how beautiful you were and you listened patiently until he asked you a question. “So what do we do now?” He started to chuckle anxiously thinking about what was next.

“I don’t know, I’ve never been pregnant before.” You joked equally as nervous.

“Same.” He cooed with a straight face. You couldn’t not laugh looking at him. He always managed to be unintentionally funny and simultaneously very cute in serious moments.

“Okay, well seeing that neither of us have been.” You kept giggling and poked at him. “I made an appointment for tomorrow but if you can’t make it, I…” Trent cut you off before you could finish your sentence.

“I can. Baby, I am here for this whole thing. I will be there. I will never not be there. This is the most important thing to me, you are the most important thing to me… this baby is the most important thing to me.” His face kind of dropped saying his last sentence. It was all becoming very real.

“Oh my god like this is mad…” you looked up at him with a scared expression on your face..

“I’m here for you. You’re mine, right baby? Gonna take such good care of you both.” He cooed and your heart shattered at how sweet he was. It was unbelievable you were about to start a family.

“Yeah.. I know” you sheepishly retorted. He held up his pinky towards you and your heart skipped a beat. He was so fucking cute. “Oh so you really mean it, huh?” You teased him.

“Absolutely. You’re mine forever.” You locked your finger around his and he used the moment to pull your arm and subsequently your body to fall into his into a sweet kiss.

“Do anything for you, beautiful.” You pursed your lips and hummed thinking of all the things he already did for you. What more could you possibly want

“Can you hold me closer, T.” You cooed, batting your eyes at him.

“Yeah, he laughed. “I got you.”

The next day you woke up to a large Trent cuddled up so closely on top of you, you could barely breathe and you liked it this way. You had an inkling this was the way this would go. He was going to be so attached to you the second he found out you were pregnant. You slid up to sit against the headboard. He hummed as you moved, clinging to your stomach tighter, pressing sleepy kisses against your bare skin.

“I can’t believe we’re going to be parents… I feel like I’m 18 most days.” You spoke into the quiet room stroking over his hair guiding your hand down to his back to scratch it gently. He purred feeling your nails. He turned his head on your stomach to look up at you. The feeling of his stubble rubbing and tickling you.

“I guess we gotta grow up.” He cooed with a smile.

“Maybe.. we’ll still be cool parents though right, T?” You giggled as your other hand came to pinch at his cheek.

“Yeah, baby. The coolest. Just adding a new baby best friend to the fam, that's all.” He cooed imagining the two of you, the dogs and the new little baby.

“That’s really cute, T.” You pouted thinking about how adorable the sentiment was. The fact that you were really going to have this baby was sinking in moment by moment. He hummed acknowledging you but returning to his task of kissing your stomach.

Your appointment at the OBGYN was later that afternoon so you and Trent got dressed and were ready to head out. He held your hand walking to your cars but looked at you confused when you let go and walked to the drivers side of yours instead of the passengers side of his.

“You can’t drive…” he looked at you and you started to genuinely laugh.

“What? Why?” Shocked, you asked muddied in a laugh. His face didn’t move. “T… I am pregnant, not like unwell.” You tried to reason with him. He just stepped towards you, slipping his hands around your waist. He tucked his head into the nape of your neck, pressing his lips to you.

“Baby… I need you to be safe, can you just come with me? I want to take care of you.” He whispered. He puckered out his bottom lip, giving you his devastating puppy dog eyes. He was committed to convincing you and it almost worked but you were not caving this time. You held your ground against their allure.

“You always take care of me. I am safe. Also, T, be realistic, we can’t be seen driving together going there right now. I want this to be our moment. Hmm?” you cooed. Your hand came to caress his cheek trying to assure him you were okay but also remind him that your pregnancy getting out to any news source or the general public getting wind would be a nightmare and would destroy any opportunity to have privacy for the next 9 months. He finally agreed and you made your way there.

“You’re only about 6 weeks along.” The nurse spoke softly, looking between you and Trent. “If you and your husband want, we can go ahead and schedule the follow up when you’re at 12 weeks. By then we should be able to find out the gender as well.”

“He’s not my husband.” You patted Trent’s thigh.Your words kind of stung him so he placed his much bigger hand over yours pinning it down. Prompting him to lean over and whisper in your ear.

“Not yet, baby.” He cheekily said and it raised goosebumps all over you. Eventually, you looked back to the nurse and so did he. You could see Trent’s brow furrow a little in your peripheral. He was trying to do the math. “Right so she’ll be 12 weeks that’s…” he paused thinking.

“3 months, baby.” You giggled teasing him squeezing your hand above his knee.

“When is it usually most safe to tell people?” Trent asked inquisitively. This was going to be like everything else, he was going to need to know absolutely everything he could. It was incredibly cute and it was incredibly Trent.

“The fetus is typically fully formed after 12 weeks, that tends to be when people feel comfortable but it is up to your personal preference, your discretion what you’d want to do.” The nurse cooed back.

“So in a month and a half, T.” You giggled again looking at his face continue to struggle.

“I’ll get there, I’m gonna like read or I don’t know, will figure it all out.” He babbled nervously. You smiled sweetly at him squeezing your hand again to reassure him just happy he was with you. He didn’t need to be nervous or do any more. He was doing great. He was amazing already. You left the offices and you clung to Trent in the car park. You swayed back and forth in his arms pressing little kisses to his lips. This was scary and new but at least you had him. You finally said your goodbyes; he went to training and you went home. He went the whole day beaming. Everyone at AXA was so confused by his outwardly cheery disposition but he couldn’t not smile anymore now that he knew he was going to have a baby with you. Later that night, Trent came home when you were in the kitchen beginning to make dinner.

“Nah, nah, nah, I was going to make dinner for you, baby.” Trent's voice almost made you jump. You turned around to see him coming down the hallway holding a big bouquet of pink flowers. You rolled your lip at him and ran over to him giving him a tight hug, abandoning the boiling pot of water on the stove. He wrapped you in his arms and kept you there, even as you cooked. When you were finally done cooking you sat with Trent on the couch eating bowls of pasta sitting unnecessarily close. Your legs draped over his lap. His one hand rubbing up your back.

“I think we should keep this relatively quiet for a little, don’t you? I want to make sure the baby is healthy and I want to share some of this time with just you until we let everyone else know.” You babled stabbing your fork mindlessly into some noodles.

“I understand, agree with you, beautiful. I just want you and the baby healthy so we’ll take it slow. Will keep you two close with me. Make sure everything is okay” He cooed, pressing a kiss to your cheek, squeezing your side. The plan to keep it quiet was great except for the fact that you had to continue on with everyday life carrying a massive secret. It was only mere days later when you had to face the task head on. You sat anxiously at an away game down in London next to Dianne and Tyler. They couldn’t possibly have known but you felt like they somehow did know. It was stressing you out the whole game. You didn’t hide much from his family so this felt wrong. As the final whistle blew you milled about and mingled until Trent was able to come out and meet you after. He beelined directly through a group of people to you, wasting no time with niceties to anyone else in the room. He grabbed you by the waist and his thumbs stroked over your stomach in a coy effort to be subtle. He smiled silently and you couldn’t control the way your heart lurched. You’d think over time his charm would lose its effect or wear down but somehow it only seemed to grow. Him being so sweet about the pregnancy was making it continue that way at a rapid pace.

“We’re so proud of you, daddy.” You cheekily whispered, pulling him into a tight hug. You draped your arms over his shoulders. Trent's heart faltered hearing your words. The word ‘daddy’ had carried way too much weight in your relationship lately. Hell, it got you to this very point but it was a little fun to throw it around now.

“This is the best secret I’ve ever had to keep.” He cooed equally as quiet into your ear. “Love you both so much.” You only giggled in return, beginning to quickly look around the room to make sure no one had heard either of you.

After the game, you all went out to dinner in London. You stood waiting at the bar for your table. Everyone ordered drinks. When the bartender came to Trent, he ordered his quick off the cuff before he turned and looked at you for what you wanted. You gave him a knowing look. He raised his eyebrows at you realizing you couldn’t drink. He leaned over the bar and he spoke quietly to the bartender. He returned and handed you a club soda with a lime. Clever, no one would know it wasn’t your usual tequila soda if they didn’t ask. You smiled cheekily and threw him a wink. You started to talk to Tyler as Trent was talking with his mum. His eyes glued to you. You unintentionally turned your back to him continuing your conversation stirring the little straw around in your soda. Trent watched you over his mum's shoulder. Dianne laughed as she tried to hold his attention. He loved how close you were with his family, how you integrated so quickly. He loved how you were with Tyler and Marcel. It was so important to him that you cared about what he cared about.

“She makes you happy, huh, Trenty?” Dianne cooed watching his gaze soften fixed on you. He shifted in his stance not responding to her. The smile on his face was telling her the answer. He moved around his mum slow squeezing her arm to not totally disregard her and started on his way over to you. You felt his hand come from behind and push your hair off your shoulder. You shuttered under his touch. The feeling of his fingers glide over your neck sending a shiver down your spine. You tilted your head to one side to try to look back at him knowing it was Trent. You watched Trent’s lips turn upwards. His eyebrows rising in smug satisfaction at the hearts that filled your eyes. You turned back with a cheeky grin into him. He pulled you to him and leaned into your ear. He started whispering all sorts of filthy things to you. You shut your eyes and licked over your lips. You pulled away looking at him. You weren’t drinking but you were certainly drunk on love, completely smitten and certain he was the man of your dreams.

"Behave yourself” you giggled, slapping at his chest praying no one could’ve overheard him. Tyler ignored you two immediately the second Trent’s hands were on you resorting to return to Dianne. You sat at dinner bashful and happy. It was such a happy couple of days. It was stressful to have to hide this secret but in general, you and Trent were so happy about the win but ultimately the baby. He was already so touchy with you to begin with but the pregnancy was bringing the affection to a new level. You let him have his way, keeping his hands on you the entire meal. You didn’t mind. You liked it. It made you feel safe. Trent was so protective of you. He kept you close to him instinctively but now, he held you closer with a watchful eye on your stomach. It made you melt and gradually over the night, really horny. When you got home personal space wasn't a thing for you anymore. You hugged his arm, squeezing his bicep, walking back into your house. You were all over Trent. Batting your eyelashes up to him, pressing your boobs against his side as you made your way to the living room.

“You’re not subtle…” he laughed as you tried to convince him to fuck you. You didn’t have to do much, in fact you really didn’t have to do anything at all.

“What do you mean, T?” You giggled feigning innocence climbing on top of him as he sat down on your living room couch. Your boobs subsequently teasingly pressed in his face.

“Alright, I’ll bite, baby.” He laughed. His hands started to caress your body and then swiftly to massage your tits. “You’re very convincing.” He teased you but you just gave him a ‘come on’ look because you knew you were. “Did you know you’re very very hot?” He cooed with a cheeky grin. You sat down on his lap and poorly attempted to reign in the horniness that was washing over you. “Like so fucking sexy.” His words didn’t help that effort. His hands kneading your tits brushing his thumbs over your hardening nipples. The more his hands were on you, the more you thought about your body, the way it was aching for him, and then suddenly, rapidly, you felt yourself tense.

“Hey… you okay?” Trent’s hands slowed in you. You felt emotion rush to your eyes. All at once, your feelings of fear about your body about to change massively came over you. One of the things Trent loved about you was your body and it was about to be gone.

“I’m just scared.” You sugarcoated your emotions for him. His hands fell from your boobs and ghosted down your sides before they settled onto your hips.

“C’mere please” he pulled at you and engulfed you in his arms. “Does it make you feel any better if I tell you I’m scared too?” He said muffled into your neck. His hands rubbed up and down your back comforting you when you least felt it. His honesty did make you feel better.

“Really?” You sheepishly asked. He laughed, pulling you off him to really look at your face. He stared into your eyes. You could feel your heart thumping in your chest.

“Baby… this is massive but you know what else?” He cooed, bringing his hand to caress your cheek. You shook your head softly giving him a ‘no.’ “We have each other in this. We’re doing it together. Hmm? You have me forever, sweet girl. I’m not going anywhere.” He spoke, brushing his thumb over your skin. Your heart warmed. He managed to settle your fears for the moment. He was so reassuring that he would never leave you. You could see it in his eyes, you could feel it under his touch. You cuddled into him. He held you close.

“I love you, T.” You gently spoke, squeezing him a little before resting your head on his chest. You stayed there for a while. The feeling of his heart beat started to lull you to sleep. You tried your hardest to keep your eyes open, to stay awake and in the moment but his loving hold making it incredibly difficult. He pressed a kiss into your hair.

"Go to sleep, baby. I’m gonna be right here forever.” He whispered and you nuzzled further into him. The feeling of being in his arms putting you ever at ease. The vibrations of his voice only pushing you closer to falling asleep. Finally your eyes falling closed. When you woke up the next day you were neatly tucked upstairs in your bed. He always took such good care of you, you never had to ask for anything. You shifted your body only to find that you were alone in the big bed. Your legs moving under the covers some before they bumped into something on the bed.

“T…?” You sleepily whispered out. Rubbing your hands over your eyes. You tried to clear your blurry vision to see where he could’ve been. To no avail, your eyes fixed on the foot of the bed seeing what you presumed to be a gift from Trent.

“Oh you’re up! Morning, pretty girl.” Trent muttered out in a hushed tone, his voice cutting into the room as he rushed over to you. He sat on the edge of the bed and handed you a cup of tea. You raised your eyebrows surprised with a tired smile. You scooted up the bed to lean against the headboard.

“Wow… good morning to you. What’s all this, baby?” You chuckled. You reached out and rubbed your hand up and down the arm he had outstretched on the bed to rest on. He shuffled on the bed though to come sit next to you. He grabbed four boxes and pulled them into his lap. He wrapped his free arm around you, smushing a kiss to your cheek. He pulled you a little closer to him before plopping the first box over on your lap. It was an ambiguously wrapped box so you gave him a curious look.

“One for you.” He cooed and you giggled.

“What’s this for?” You asked pausing before opening the gift: he shot a stern glare back at you so you continued on. You peeled off the paper and saw a familiar orange box you knew well. You opened it slow. It was a pair of Hermes Finesse diamond earrings. You bopped your head back and forth with a big cheesy smile on your face staring at them.

“So pretty, T.” Grabbing his face for a quick peck. You placed the box down onto your comforter after inspecting them for a little while. He plopped the next box in your lap. You rolled your eyes at his childish rough nature so early.

“One for the baby…” he said softly rubbing his hand over your stomach. It was a much larger box than the last. You opened it slow again to find another orange box. You smiled lifting the lid to see an adorable Hermes teddy bear. You pouted your lips at him. You felt like you were gonna cry before he plopped the next one on you, stopping your flooding emotions. “Keep moving along, baby. Have more to open.” He laughed, waving his hand to continue. “For you.”

“You know the baby seems to be getting bigger presents than me, is that how things are going to be?” You teased squeezing his arm. It was his turn to roll his eyes at you. You opened a third orange box. You unlatched a jewelry box to see three stackable rings.

“One for each person in our family now.” He looked into your eyes. You melted thinking of him picking out something so thoughtful. You slid them on and held up your hand to look at the three rings wrapped around your slender finger.

“I love them… I love you.” You collapsed your head onto his shoulder wrapping your arms around his waist.

“You like them, baby?” He spoke before pressing a kiss into your hair. You nodded as he slid the last box over to you. You peeled the paper again slowly to reveal the final orange box. “One more for them” you opened the lid taking your time and your heart slowed. You felt the room close in. You stared down at a cashmere Avalon blanket. You took it out of the box to get a closer look at the detailed lettering embroidered ‘Baby Alexander-Arnold’ That was the tipping point for you. The tears started pouring out. “Oh. C’mon shhh.” Trent pulled you into him. He squeezed you so tight.

“I love you.” You sniffled out. He hummed. You stayed like that for a while. “Wait, wait, actually I got you something too! I didn’t know when to give them to you but now seems good.” You scrambled out of bed messily. Trent laughed at your sleepy body moving without the grace you usually carried.

“Baby, didn’t have to get me anything.” He said as you ran into the wardrobe hearing his voice fade getting further from him. You came out with three bags giddily and jumped on the bed playfully. You took his hands in yours after placing the bags in between you. He gave you a disapproving look for buying him anything.

“Just open it! Please!” You begged childishly pulling on his arm. You shoved one bag over closer to him. He reluctantly grabbed one bag. “Hold on! This one first!” You swapped the bags and he shook his head. He ruffled through the bag and pulled out a baby Liverpool kit.

“Nah… honestly.” He held up the top and turned it around to see ‘daddy’ written across the back with a 66. He looked at you with a sappy smile. Trent felt like this was the first time he really felt like a dad, like this was not only just a baby but his kid. You pecked his lips unannounced. You couldn’t look at the tiny jersey the put getting excited. The idea of bringing your baby to their daddy play was a dream and you knew Trent felt the same. You pushed the next bag at him. He fumbled through the bag again and pulled out a pretty chic, in your opinion, black Prada baby bag. “It’s actually really good.” He laughed unexpectedly, pretty impressed with it. You felt a little relieved he wasn't freaked out by the baby-centric gifts. You picked up the final bag and placed it in his lap. He pulled out a matte all black Prada football. His eyes widened and a big grin pulled across his face.

“Cool dad, no?” You giggled as he threw the designer football up and down. You stopped him when you pulled his face to yours with his cheeks in your hands. His laugh breaking out mid kiss halting it.

“Massively. Thank you, baby.” He cooed muddied in giggles, pressing a kiss to your lips. You hummed. You sat in your bed surrounded by spontaneous baby gifts. You stroked your hand over his high cheekbones. There was nowhere else you should’ve been. This is where you belonged; with your Trent; and that’s just what he was… yours. Trent’s words cut off your moment of reverie. “Not just for these. Thank you for giving me our child.” He spoke softly, rubbing his hands up your sides.

“Ours” you whispered sealed with a kiss.

•

Thank you for reading! Please like, comment, or message what you thought of the chapter / series … 🤍 This was so fun to write and I really hope you enjoyed it.

Go read the first chapter of the sequel series ‘Ours’ xx

[keisgirl]

hii! can I please request a fic? before that are you okay writing a poly one I'm supposed to request a ot7 enha in a angsty soulmate au where y/n and enha are childhood friends back then they didn't know they were soulmates but one day a girl befriend them and they start to get really close to her eventually making them distance with y/n that's when she know her soulmate are her friends, prompt #21 . but if your not comfortable writing them then maybe heeseung instead in prompt #12 thank you very much in advance ❤

OML HELLO ANON! im of course comfortable with writing a poly angst soulmate fic ft. enha but its going to take me some time sorry... i can tag you on the fic when its out! heres the heeseung angst you requested~ hope you liked it!

halfway heart; enhypen heeseung

prompt; #12 "you didnt sound this distant when you promised i was the only one you needed."

pairing; idol!heeseung x reader

wc; 0.8k

pls reblog and like if you liked the drabble!

looking for moots <3

cheers,, hannah

kpop drabble masterlist | prompt list #1

it starts with the silences.

those quiet spaces between texts that grow longer. where you used to get a reply within minutes, now it’s hours. sometimes, it’s a day. your phone screen stays cold in your hand, and you can’t help but wonder if he’s even seen your message at all, or if he’s too busy—too distracted—to care.

you tell yourself he’s working, that things must be hectic. you know his schedule is packed, filled with rehearsals, meetings, performances. but that excuse starts to wear thin when you see the updates, the new posts, the smiles that don’t quite reach his eyes.

you keep scrolling past the photos, forcing yourself not to overthink the likes, the comments from strangers calling him theirs. you know better than to assume. you know he chose you. but that doesn’t stop the bubbling ache in your chest from growing every time you see a post from him with someone else, laughing, looking effortlessly close.

the next time you finally talk, it’s over the phone. it’s been weeks since you’ve seen him, and the distance is something you can no longer ignore.

“hee..i miss you,” you say quietly, the words hanging in the air.

there’s a pause. too long. too much space between what you say and what you need to hear.

“i miss you too,” he replies, but the words are hollow, like he’s saying them because he has to, not because he feels them.

and that’s what breaks you.

“you didn’t sound this distant when you promised i was the only one you needed,” you murmur, the frustration and sadness bubbling to the surface, breaking through the cracks that have been forming for too long.

there’s another pause, and you know he’s searching for the right words. something to reassure you. but this time, you’re not sure if he can fix it.

“i’m still here,” he says, but even as he speaks, you can feel him slipping away. “it’s just… it’s hard right now. there’s so much going on, and i don’t know how to balance everything.”

“so where does that leave me?” you ask, voice trembling.

he doesn’t answer right away. the silence that follows is heavy, suffocating. the kind that leaves no room for hope, only a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach.

“i’m trying,” he says eventually. “but maybe… maybe that’s not enough.”

those words sting more than anything else he’s said.

you don’t respond right away. the weight of everything you’ve been holding in presses down, making it hard to breathe. you thought love would be enough. that no matter what obstacles came your way, you’d face them together. but now, standing on opposite sides of this growing distance, you’re not sure if you can hold on any longer.

“do you still want this?” you ask, voice barely above a whisper. “do you still want us?”

he hesitates, and that hesitation says more than any answer he could’ve given.

your heart sinks, a painful realization settling in. it’s not that he doesn’t love you—it’s that he’s choosing other things over you. his dreams, his career, the expectations placed on his shoulders. maybe he didn’t mean to hurt you, but in the end, his choices speak louder than his words.

“i don’t know,” he finally admits, and it’s like the ground falls out from under you.

“i see,” you say, voice shaky, trying to hold back the tears threatening to spill. you don’t want him to hear how broken you feel, how much this is tearing you apart.

“i never wanted to hurt you,” he says, voice softer now, filled with guilt. “i just—i didn’t know it would be this hard.”

you swallow the lump in your throat. “i know,” you reply, and it’s the truth. you knew this wouldn’t be easy. you knew the risks, the challenges of being with someone whose life was constantly in the spotlight, who had to balance so much more than just you.

but that doesn’t make it any less painful.

“i think…” you start, taking a shaky breath. “i think maybe we need some space.”

the words taste bitter on your tongue, but you know it’s the only way to protect yourself. if you keep holding on, if you keep waiting for him to come back, you’ll only end up hurting more.

there’s a long silence on the other end of the line.

“yeah,” he finally says, voice barely audible. “maybe we do.”

you bite your lip, trying to keep it together. “take care of yourself, okay?”

“you too.”

and with that, the call ends. you stare at your phone for a long moment, the weight of everything crashing down on you all at once.

it’s over, you realize. not in an explosive, dramatic way. but in the quiet fading of what once was, leaving behind nothing but the ache of what could have been.

just message me if you want to be on the taglist for the enha fic!

[willalove75]

Alcina's New Maid Pt. 6 Lady Dimitrescu x Reader

Summary: Lady Dimitrescu brings you in as one of her maids, at least, that's what you thought she brought you to the castle for.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI

Tags: flirty, fluff, slow burn, smut, angst.

Notes: Part 6! The angst, SO MUCH ANGST. I think this is the least amount of dialogue I've ever had in a fic so I hope you all like it💕 Do I want to stay up all night and write chapter 7 right now? Yes. Holy shit yes. But I have stupid 'sponserbilities and adulting to do so part 7 will have to wait until next week. Until then, please enjoy this angsty as fuck chapter💕💕

Click here for the rest of the series

It struck you as odd that Alcina said you were to be by her side at all times, yet you barely saw her over the last few days. You were either in your room or with the girls; a couple of times you felt like Zina was tasked with babysitting you while you followed her around the castle, helping her with some of her duties. You haven't even been into your Mistresses chambers or her study since you got the concussion. Every time you did see Alcina, she didn't act like she normally does when she's around you, she seemed colder, more distant. That was apparent when you went to the dining hall the night of the incident and instead of being seated next to Alcina like you usually were, your chair was at the opposite end of the long dining table. Alcina barely looked at you, you thought maybe she just had a rough day and you tried to not think too much into it; but every time you've had a meal with them since, your chair was placed as far away from her as possible.

It was impossible for the thoughts to not flood your mind, wondering if you did something wrong, if maybe she was finally bored with you, if you just weren't living up to her expectations? She hasn't relieved you of your duties and she hasn't brought any other maids into her chambers, at least that you're aware of. The thought of her bringing another maid into her bed made your stomach twist with jealousy, but not rage. It was mostly just sadness, disappointment, heartbreak even. You hoped she wasn't, but truth be told you really had no idea and the thought haunted you a little.

The girls noticed a difference in their mother too, but they didn't dare talk to you about it, and you respected that. That didn't stop you from overhearing them mention that Alcina has been more agitated and easily angered lately. She damn near took a maids head off when the maid tripped in front of her. The maid was fine, traumatized for sure when Alcina whipped out her claws and threatened the poor girl with them, but physically unharmed.

Alcina's week has been anything but relaxing, she's done everything she possibly could to avoid you minus locking you away in your room. She tried her hardest to avoid looking at you during meals, seating you on the opposite end of the table. Being directly across from her made trying not to look at you difficult but she managed to ignore you for the most part. There were definitely a few stolen glances, but every time she caught herself looking at you she pried her eyes away and tried to distract herself with something else.

She noticed the look in your eyes during the last few meals, a look of sadness, confusion, uncertainty. Alcina brushed it off and did her best to keep the guilt from eating away at her. Her vices were her crutch during these trying times, she's been smoking nearly twice as much and drinking at least a bottle of her wine a day, sometimes two. The only vice she hasn't been able to satisfy was the sexual frustration that's been pent up inside of her. At this point she might as well be avoiding you because the minute she talks to you, she might just throw you onto her bed and ravage you, the complete opposite of what she feels like she has to do. She's been horny, but hasn't been able to bring herself to take another maid into her chambers. Instead her pent up frustrations have been released in bursts of unbridled anger.

It's not that Alcina really wants to avoid you, to shut you out, to put every feeling she has towards you into a box and never touch it again; she feels like she has to. Not only to protect you, but more for her own protection. She hasn't let herself get close to anyone since she was human, years before she was infected with the cadou and was mutated. The walls she built only got bigger and stronger once she was turned into what she is today, only letting her daughters in once they came to her. You managed to climb over and break down so many of her walls so effortlessly it terrified her, but the companionship was nice and she enjoyed caring for someone other than the girls, plus, she genuinely began to like you.

As soon as she realized how attached she was becoming, she bolted. Between Stefana and Mother Miranda, especially Mother Miranda, coming after you, wanting to cause you harm, she couldn't bear the thought of it. It was as if someone threatened to rip her heart out of her chest, a feeling she was not only completely not used to, but something that made her feel more vulnerable than she's ever experienced before. Every day since she began avoiding you she's had to convince herself that what she's doing is for the best.

After lunch you asked the girls to take you into the library, which Daniela happily agreed to, the other two followed out of obligation to their mother's orders. Daniela enjoyed the same kind of books as you, romance novels for the most part, some fantasy. She also enjoyed thrillers, but after one night of terrible nightmares that were brought on by reading her "It", you both decided it was best if she read those by herself. You began piling a few books you and Daniela picked out on one of the tables while the girls bickered as usual. Once you were satisfied with your selections you went to find the girls to head back to your room.

"Daniela? Bela? Cass?" You call out for them as you walk around the library. "Are you guys still here?"

After walking around for a minute and unable to hear them arguing, or even the buzzing of flies, you call out for them again; searching between the bookshelves in case they were just playing a game.

In one of the chaise lounges near the window you see Alcina laying across it, her head resting on her hand, invested in the book she's reading. Her eyes shift up to you as you come around the shelf.

"Oh, hi, sorry. I didn't know you were here." You nervously say. "I was looking for the girls."

Her gorgeous gold eyes stare into yours for a few moments, you try and see if you can gauge any kind of reaction in them but they're like stone. They shift back down to her book and she continues to read, as if you already walked away, or as if you were never there to begin with.

You feel a pain in your chest when she acts like you don't exist. It's taking all of the self restraint in your body to not break down and grab her face and ask her what you did wrong, begging for forgiveness for something that might not even exist. Instead you settle for asking if she needs anything, anything to make her speak to you.

"Is there anything you need me to do?"

Her eyes leave the page and snap up to yours, an intensity in them that hasn't been directed at you in a while. She closes the book in her hand and stands, you crane your neck and follow her eyes up, desperate for something, anything. Even if she just screamed at you, at least she'll have spoken to you. A lump in your throat grows as she turns and walks away without saying a word.

Closing your eyes in defeat, you stand there for a minute, gathering the strength to keep the tears you feel building at bay. You go back to your search for the girls, a swarm eventually showing up in the middle of the library.

"I'm so sorry!" Daniela cries and wraps her arms around you.

"What? What happened?"

"We left you!"

"It's okay," you laugh "I'm fine, I had a feeling one of you were gonna show up eventually."

Daniela looks at you, she has a small smile on her face but guilt in her eyes.

"Hey, it's okay kiddo, I'm not upset or mad, we're good, no worries." The guilt in her eyes fade and her smile grows. "Want to go read one of these?" You ask, picking up the stack.

"YES!" She squeals.

In a flash there's a swarm of flies surrounding you and lifting you off of the ground.

"Oh my god!" You yell as you laugh.

Daniela flies the both of you to your room at lightening speed, you're surprised and grateful you managed to hold onto the stack of books the whole way there. She sets you down onto your feet and emerges next to you from the swarm.

She picks out one of the books and you read to her until dinner. When the dinner bell rings Daniela whines, not wanting you to put the book down. Reluctantly, she gets up and swarms out and you follow her to the dining room.

The girls appear in their seats in the dining room as you walk in, you see your chair at the opposite end of the table, the same place its been for the last week, and you take your seat.

The maids bring out your meals, you quietly thank the maid who puts your meal down in front of you and you stare at it for a moment. What's the point of having every meal with them every day if she's just going to ignore you? There's a part of you that wants to get up and go back into your room, but you fight against the urge.

The clinking of silverware against the plates pulls you out of your thoughts and you quietly eat, although your hunger is suddenly gone.

"How was your day girls?" Alcina says. You look up and see her looking at her daughters, not even acknowledging your existence.

"Our hunt this morning was a lot of fun!" Bela says.

"Yeah, I killed so many lycans, I even got a deer!"

"Hey! I helped!" Daniela says.

"Yeah, barely."

They begin to argue over the subject and Alcina clears her throat and gives them both a look and they immediately drop it.

"Y/n started reading this really good book to me!" Daniela says with excitement in her voice.

You notice Alcina's face drop a little when she hears your name, you feel your heart drop as you watch. She gently smiles at Daniela, hiding her reaction.

"That's wonderful draga."

Your heart feels like it's in your stomach, you've barely touched your food and Bela notices.

"Do you not like it y/n?" She asks.

"Oh, no" you say, snapping out of your trance. "No it's delicious, I'm just not very hungry."

Your eyes meet Alcinas for a second and she looks away, crushing you even more.

After dinner you head to your room and read for a little while. Your stomach begins to growl and you get up and open your door, hoping to find a maid or one of the girls. Luckily you see a maid walking through the hall with cleaning supplies in her hand.

"Hey, can you do me a favor? Can you get one of the girls for me?" It's well known that you're not allowed to go anywhere by yourself now so the maid nods her head and walks off.

A few minutes later a swarm appears in your room.

"You rang?" You hear Bela say as she emerges from the swarm.

"Yeah, sorry, want to come down to the kitchen with me? I'm starting to get hungry."

"What is with you lately? You seem, weird. You and mom seem weird."

"I'm fine, just an off week I guess." You shrug.

"Okay," she says, unconvinced. "Lets go."

The two of you go into the kitchen and you whip up a quick sandwich and eat it as you both head back to your room. Once you get up the stairs Bela turns to you.

"Do I need to walk the extra 50 feet with you or can you manage not getting killed?" She teases.

"I'll be fine, thanks Bela."

She heads off in the opposite direction as you head towards your room.

As you walk past Alcina's door it opens and you see one of the new maids walk out. Her face is flush, her hair is messy, her legs are shaking and she looks mortified when she sees you. Your heart sinks into the bottom of your stomach, you know what caused the maids disheveled look, you know what just took place in Alcina's chambers. Looking up you see Alcina, who's surprised to see you as she wasn't expecting you to be outside of her door; you think you see shame in her eyes but your vision starts to become blurry as tears filled your eyes. You run into your room and shut the door without saying a word to either of them.

Hot tears flow into your pillow as you curl up in bed and sob. You're heartbroken and mad, mad at Alcina for providing such a false sense of security, mad at yourself for not listening and for getting attached. Zina was right, about everything. She'll make you feel special, but she really doesn't care about you, you're replaceable, disposable to her, just a plaything. A toy to use for her own enjoyment until she gets bored and wants something new to play with.

Unlike Stefana, you're not mad at the maid, you know it's not her fault, you don't even feel the urge to lash out at her. You're more upset at Alcina, not just for making you feel special and ripping it all away from you, but for not even giving you the curtesy of telling you. No warning, nothing. One day she's protecting you, from two different people and nursing you back to health, and the very next day its like you never existed.

Heartbroken, you cry into your pillow until you tire yourself out and finally fall asleep.

With some rare free time, Alcina decides to go to the library and find a new book to read. She picks up a book that peaked her interest and begins to read the first few pages. Immediately drawn in, she abandons her plans to read in her chambers and sits down on the closest thing to her, a chaise lounge in the corner by the window. Noises fill the library, but her attention is glued to the book so she pays them no mind. Her attention wasn't drawn away from her book until she sees something moving in front of her over the edge of her book, she looks up and sees you.

Surprised, she masks her emotions as she looks into your eyes. The knot in her stomach grows, she hears you speak but doesn't respond. Hoping you'll just leave, she turns her attention back to her book, although she can't focus at all with you standing in front of her.

"Is there anything you need me to do?"

Her eyes snap up into yours when she hears your shaking voice, she anticipates seeing fear in your eyes, she's a little taken back when she sees desperation, a deep sadness instead. An internal battle in her mind wages on, part of her just wants to wrap you in her arms and hold you, the other part just wants to pretend you don't exist. Realizing she's staring for too long she closes her book and stands up, there's a small second where she almost gives in to her desire, but she stays steadfast with her plan; she says nothing and walks away.

The look in your eyes haunts her as she makes her way back to her chambers. She tosses the book on her bed and walks up to her vanity and grabs the edge, lowering her head she pushes everything she's feeling back into its box. With her frustration and tension at an all time high she decides to try and provide some relief for herself.

She removes her hat and gloves and makes herself comfortable in her bed. With her eyes closed she pulls up her dress and slides her hand between her legs. After a few minutes of finding absolutely no relief, she gets up and goes into her wardrobe and grabs her favorite toy. This one always seems to do the trick and she's desperately hoping it doesn't fail her. She works the toy in and out of her and her anger only grows; she might as well not be touching herself because that would give her just about the same amount of pleasure that she's getting right now.

More frustrated than ever, she chucks the toy against the wall and lays back down, staring at the ceiling. In her head she goes over a list of maids she can bring into her chambers, every time she tries to picture one in bed with her, they always turn into you. Her frustration reaches its peak and she hears the dinner bell ring. A low growl rumbles in her chest and she gets up, places her hat back on her head, slides her gloves back on and makes her way down to the dining room.

She manages to avoid looking at you for the majority of the meal, focusing her attention on her plate and her girls. It wasn't until Daniela mentioned your name when she felt a sinking feeling in her heart. In an instant she pushes the feeling away, hoping you didn't witness her moment of weakness. Bela mentions that you barely touched your food and she quickly glances at your plate. It hasn't been touched except for one or two bites, you've just been pushing the rest around mindlessly.

Once dinner ends Alcina quickly makes her way back to her chambers. As she's walking through the halls she spots one of her newer maids. A cute, sweet looking girl, she can't be more than 20. Alcina doesn't know her name, and truth be told she doesn't really care to. All she knows is that the girl is quiet and does a decent job on the tasks she's assigned.

Usually when she talks to a maid about coming into her chambers she's flirtatious, mysterious, she likes to toy with the girls for a little bit, but tonight, Alcina doesn't have the patience.

Alcina walks up to the girl, who immediately looks terrified. Bending down to come off as less intimidating, Alcina speaks softly to the girl, but her demeanor doesn't change. If anything, she's more afraid now that the Lady is nearly eye-level with her. If she wasn't so pent up with frustrations Alcina would make a mental note to try and come off as less intimidating, but she's too focused on finding any kind of relief to even think about anything else.

With the girl finally in her chambers, Alcina lays with her on the bed and softly kisses her. It annoys her that the girl doesn't soften up at all, she's stiff as a board with fear, even after Alcina repeatedly tried to ease her fears, it was no use, so she continues anyway. It's not that the maiden was unwilling, Alcina told her she can tell her to stop at any time and she would, whether or not the maid believed her, or was too terrified to speak up was another story. Although if the maids drenched panties were any indication, Alcina had a feeling she was fine with it, probably just terrified that she was going to kill her. The girls soft cries as she came almost made Alcina finish without even being touched. She's never been this desperate before.

Alcina laid next to the maiden on her bed and pulled up her dress and removed her panties and ordered the girl between her legs. Nervous at first, the girl seem scattered, but after some praising and reassuring moans she found her rhythm and within minutes Alcina was cumming all over her face and hand. At the height of her orgasm she thought of you, she almost called out your name but bit down hard on her lip to stop it from slipping out. As she was recovering she looked down at the maiden between her legs and for a fleeting second, was disappointed it wasn't you. It was getting harder and harder to get you out of her head and she wasn't sure if she would be able to take much more of it. She felt as if trying to ignore you so much just made you more irresistible to her, it frustrated her to no end.

The maiden cleaned herself up and Alcina led her to the door for her to leave. Alcina opened the door and froze, there you were, standing right in front of her, walking back to your room. The look in your eyes when you saw the maiden, the way you immediately knew what had just happened almost broke Alcina. She's never felt shame like this before in her life and the guilt practically swallowed her whole. Alcina wasn't even able to hide the look of shame on her face when you looked up at her, the feeling only got worse when she saw the tears building up in your eyes.

She would have been grateful that you ran off if it didn't cause her so much physical pain in her chest seeing you that way. Knowing that she was the cause of your pain, she couldn't even think about it. The maiden stood there frozen, unsure of what to do. Alcina bent down and put her lips to her ear.

"Thank you sweetling." She said, petting her head.

The maiden took that as her cue to leave which Alcina was grateful for because she didn't have the patience or the constitution to keep herself together for much longer.

With the maiden on her way Alcina closed the door and stood there for a moment with her hand against it. She could hear your heartbeat in the room next door, she could hear you quiet sobs as you cried into your pillow. Out of all of the horrific screams and sounds she's heard in her life, hearing you crying, because of what she did to you, was once of the worst sounds she's ever heard. Alcina somberly got herself ready for bed and laid down, pulling the duvet over her. She listened to you cry until your heartbeat finally settled, letting her know that you finally fell asleep.

Alcina can't remember the last time she cried, but for the first time in years, tears escaped from her gold eyes and plummeted onto her pillow.