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starrynighttime · 5 years ago

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Chat Blanc: Scarlet Lady AU Part 1

AU by @zoe-oneesama

Big thanks to @minimalist-dreamer for helping me write this!

Part 2

Marinette was having a pretty good day, and she was sure it was only going to get better. First, she had finished all her homework early, then she completed some sketches that she was quite proud of, and now she had a meeting with Adrien at the café with patrol right after! She pushed open the door with a pep in her step. Not even Scarlet Lady could ruin today!

Adrien squirmed in his seat. Plagg had told him over and over that there was nothing to worry about, and he was probably right, but Adrien was still nervous. What if he said the wrong thing? What if he spilled coffee all over himself? What if- Adrien stopped himself before he could assume the worst. It was just going to be him and Marinette, two friends at a coffee shop talking about fashion and other things.

Before long, he heard the bells by the door chime and Marinette walked in. She smiled when she saw him.

“Hey, Adrien! Were you waiting for very long?” she asked, sitting across from him. Adrien shook his head.

“Not at all!” he said, pulling himself out of a trance. They ordered their coffees and caught up a little bit until they arrived. Then Marinette pulled out her sketchbook.

“So, what do you think of these for the upcoming fashion contest?” she asked, sliding it towards him. Adrien flipped through the book curiously and quickly got blown away.

“Wow” was all he could bring himself to say. “T-these are amazing, Marinette.” Marinette smiled shyly.

“Thanks, Adrien. I’m just a bit nervous. I mean, it’s not every day your dad announces a design contest like this. I’m jittery just thinking about it.” she murmured, sipping her coffee. Adrien smiled.

“Well, with designs like these-”

“Well, well, well!” a familiar, haughty voice called from behind them. Marinette and Adrien grimaced in unison as Chloe walked over to their table. “Adrikins, what are you doing here with Dupain-Cheng? You do realize that hanging around with low-lives will turn you into one, right?”

“Is that why he stopped hanging out with you?” Marinette grumbled under her breath. Chloe shot her a dirty look.

“Well, Maritrash-”

“Her name is Marinette.” Adrien interrupted. “And we’re here together because she wanted me to give her some advice on her designs, not that she needed it, though. Her designs are impeccable.” Chloe’s eyes narrowed. Then, she grinned evilly.

“Are they really? I’ll just take a look and--Oopsy!” Chloe poured her coffee onto Marinette’s open sketchbook. “Looks like your designs are ruined.” Adrien’s face contorted with rage.

“Chloe! What the f-”

“Adrien, it’s okay.” Marinette murmured, her voice impossibly calm.

“It’s okay?! But-”

“This is my laminated sketchbook.”

“What?”

“WHAT?!”

Marinette smiled and wiped the coffee off of her designs with her napkin. Sure enough, the laminated pages protected the designs effectively. Marinette smiled innocently at Chloe, who had an expression of pure rage on her face. With a mighty hmph, the Mayor’s daughter stormed out of the café.

Marinette took a sip of coffee and checked her watch. 5:15. “I should probably get going. I have to get up early tomorrow.” Adrien nodded, still frazzled from what had just happened.

“I-yeah, me too. It was great hanging out with you, Marinette.” the baker’s daughter blushed slightly and smiled.

“We should do this again sometime, just us two.” Now it was Adrien’s turn to blush.

“I’d like that.”

———————

Marinette ducked into an alleyway and Pollen flew out of her purse, smiling knowingly.

“Has my queen found her prince?” the kwami teased. Marinette blushed.

“H-he’s just a friend.”

“A very handsome friend.”

“I-I just... Buzz on!” Marinette transformed and threw out her spinning top. She had a patrol to get to.

Adrien stared in shock as Marigold flew out of the alleyway that Marinette was just in.

“What?” He murmured.

Marigold hopped across the rooftops, slightly red in the face. She was so caught up in her thoughts that she nearly ran into Bunnix, who was walking out of her burrow.

“Woah, there, Mini-gold! Slow down before you break an ankle!” Marigold blinked.

“Bunnix? What are you-”

“-Listen carefully.” Bunnix interrupted, placing her hands on Marigold’s shoulders. “Something happened today that caused a major disaster in the future, but I’m not sure what it was or when it happened exactly. Anything unusual to report on your side?”

Surprised, Marigold shook her head. Bunnix chewed on her lip.

“Okay, in my Burrow, now!” Before Marigold could protest, Bunnix grabbed her arm and pulled her through the time portal.

Bunnix put a bowl on Marigold’s head as soon as she was inside.

“Wait, what? Why is-”

“Wanna know what you’re getting for your next birthday?”

“Of course not.”

“Exactly!”

A little while later, Bunnix pushed Marigold through a different portal and removed the bowl from her head. Marigold’s eyes widened.

“What happened here?”

“The less you know about the future, the better. Just capture the Akuma in your weapon and bring it back to me. Then the train will be back on track.”

“You’re not staying?”

“I gotta stand ready to jump back into time and try something else, in case you fail. Mwah!”

Bunnix blew a kiss and walked back into her Burrow. She placed a hand on a nearby portal to watch the events that led up to this moment.

———————

Marigold plopped down next to Cat Noir, who smiled.

“Heya, Goldie. What’s up?”

“Everything, Cat Noir. Today was the perfect day. Not even Scarlet Lady can ruin today!”

“Wow. That good, huh?”

Marigold nodded and looked out at the sunset. Cat Noir snuck a glance at her. How did he not figure it out sooner? Their kindness, their determination, their laugh, even their smiles were the same.

After the patrol, Adrien detransformed in an alleyway.

“I can’t believe it, Plagg,” he said as the kwami appeared in front of him. “The two most amazing girls I know are the same girl!” Plagg gulped.

“Are you entirely sure that Marigold and Marinette are the same people?” Adrien grinned.

“Well, you just confirmed it! I never said either of their names before you did!”

“Son of a fish.”

“But this is so amazing! I mean, I was holding back because I didn’t want to endanger Marinette and I was quickly falling for my superhero partner. Not to mention being Scarlet Lady’s ‘partner’ is exhausting and time-consuming so I wouldn’t be able to devote my time properly to either of them anyway. But now, I know they’re the same girl AND Marinette can protect herself just fine AND she’s freed me from the burden of having to work with Scarlet. That’s... the biggest three-way win I can think of.”

Plagg couldn’t help but let a little smile slip through. His kitten was just so happy. And he had to admit, he really couldn’t do much better than Marinette/Marigold. Even before she got the bee miraculous, she was a hero. Plagg shook off the warm and fuzzy feelings.

“Alright kid. I get it. Love and happiness and whatnot. Can we go home now? I need some cheese.” Adrien smiled.

“Plagg, never change.”

“Never will.”

Adrien walked out of the alleyway, not noticing his yellow-clad superheroine partner, frozen on the roof with shock. She didn’t hear what he was saying to his kwami, but she had just seen him detransform.

“What?” Marigold murmured, her eyes wide.

———————

Later, Marinette flopped onto her bed and screamed into a pillow. Pollen buzzed worriedly above her. “Marinette, are you alright?”

“No! I’m not alright! Everything is just so frickin perfect!” Marinette exclaimed. Pollen frowned, confused.

“Wait, is everything not alright or is everything perfect? Humans can be so confusing.” Pollen muttered. Marinette took a deep breath.

“It’s just... Adrien is Cat Noir. The two kindest and most amazing guys I know are the same guy! I mean, I was holding myself back because I was torn between them and they were both equally stressed and overworked. Now, I know they’re the same guy AND I know WHY he was stressed AND I can lessen his burden. It’s like... the biggest three way win I can think of.”

Pollen smiled at her holder, then frowned at her sad expression.

“But then... why are you so upset?” Marinette sat up and hugged a pillow to her chest.

“Well, because I’ve been denying my feeling for both of these guys for who knows how long. Just because I’ve found out my feelings for him doesn’t mean that he has them for me. And I don’t want to ruin the amazing friendship I already have because of my feelings.” Pollen smiled and buzzed next to her.

“I think you should tell him. If he does reject your feelings, that’s okay. Just keep on being friends with him. It sounds like you two have an amazing relationship, anyway. Just because he doesn’t share the same romantic feelings back doesn’t mean you should stop being friends.” Marinette smiled.

“Thanks, Pollen. That makes me feel better.”

“Anytime, Marinette.”

(A/n: monologues come from this post)

———————

Adrien blushed.

“W-what?”

“I-I’m in love with you, Adrien. And I’ve been denying it for years and I literally just found out last week and now I have no idea what to do and now I’m rambling and-”

“-I’m in love with you too.” Adrien interrupted. Marinette’s eyes widened.

“Really?” Adrien nodded and took her hand.

“Yeah.”

They smiled at each other and leaned in slightly...

“And then what happened?!” Alya exclaimed. Marinette grinned.

“You want to go get some lunch? I’m starving.” she said, walking ahead in the direction of the bakery. Alya gasped.

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng, don’t you dare walk away from me! I must know what happened!” she shrieked, chasing her grinning friend. Eventually, she grabbed Marinette’s hand.

“C’mon, Marinette! What happened?!” Marinette smiled and looked up at the sky longingly.

“Well, then he kissed me.” she murmured, her cheeks coloring slightly as she remembered. Alya couldn’t help herself. She let out a squeal of excitement and hugged her best friend. “Alya...”

“I’m so happy! My two best friends are together and they’re in love and they’re going to be together forever!”

———————

“Dude! That’s amazing!” Nino exclaimed, clapping his best friend on the back.

“Yeah, I almost can’t believe it actually happened.” Adrien said, grinning shyly. Nino spun around and grabbed onto Adrien’s shoulders.

“Dude. Is it really that unbelievable? You two have had feelings for each other for a very long time and you are going to be together forever.” Adrien blushed.

“Do you really think so?”

“I know so. Trust me.”

———————

Marigold swung across Paris in the direction of the Eiffel Tower to meet Cat Noir. Three million thoughts ran through her head. Should I tell him I know who he is? Should I tell him who I am? Should I tell him we’re together in our civilian forms? What if he thinks I’m only with him because he’s Cat Noir? What if he doesn’t want to be with me when he finds out who I am? What if-

Marigold slammed into the side of the tower, interrupting her train of thought.

“Woah there, Goldie!” a familiar voice called. She turned to see Cat Noir with a concerned expression on his face. “Are you okay? That was a pretty hard hit.” Marigold nodded.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just have a lot on my mind.” She answered, landing on the cool metal beam next to her partner. “Is Scar going to show up?” Cat Noir shrugged.

“Probably not, but I don’t care.” Marigold chuckled.

“So, anyway, what’s been going on with you?” she asked noncholantly. Cat Noir hesitated, then blushed.

“Well, I have a girlfriend now.” he admitted, finally. “Honestly, I feel lucky she even likes me. She’s talented, kind, and determined... I fell in love instantly.” Marigold blinked in surprise.

“Did you really?” Cat Noir nodded.

“Of course. I would have been insane not to.” Marigold fought to hide her blush. This was Adrien, her boyfriend, talking about her. “Anyway, what about you?” Cat Noir asked, interrupting her thoughts. “Anything going on in your life?” Marigold hesitated. How much should she reveal?

“Well...” she began “I actually have a boyfriend now. I can’t belive how long it took for me to realize my feelings for him. He is handsome, kind, and helpful. Oh, and he’s also a huge dork. You should see how excited he gets whenever we watch Tangled together. He just...” Marigold sighed. “I love that dork so much, it’s not even funny.” Her partner sniffled beside her. “Cat Noir... are you crying?”

“What? No! I just... have something in my eye.” He coughed into his elbow. Marigold raised an eyebrow, but decided to let it go.

“Hey.” She raised a fist for him to bump. “No matter what, we’ll always have each other, right?” Cat Noir hesitated, then bumped her fist with a smile.

“Of course.” He said. “Always and forever.”

———————

“It’s heartbreak for all the girls in Paris as supermodel Adrien Agreste has a girlfriend, classmate Marinette Dupain-Cheng.”

Marinette learned how to evade paparazzi pretty quickly. After all, her boyfriend was an expert.

———————

“Miss Dupain-Cheng, your relationship with my son is detrimental to the Gabriel Agreste brand. I demand that you stop seeing him at once.”

“What? But... I didn’t do anything.”

“If you refuse, I will remove Adrien from school and he will never see his friends again.”

Marinette gasped and dropped the tray of macarons she was holding.

“A-Adrien doesn’t deserve this!” she cried.

“Then make the right choice.”

Tears slid down Marinette’s face. Without warning, she turned on her heel and ran upstairs and into her room, locking the trapdoor behind her. She threw herself onto her bed and sobbed. The clouds darkened overhead, reflecting her mood. Pollen tried to comfort her, but there was nothing she could do.

A little while later, Marinette walked downstairs. Her hair was a mess, her face was blotchy, and her eyes were bloodshot. She didn’t say anything. She just grabbed an umbrella and walked out the door, ignoring her parents’ looks of concern.

———————

She promised herself that she wouldn’t cry, but she knew deep down that it was impossible. She hated doing it. She hated that she was making herself do this. She hated seeing his heart break in half as she forced the words out of her mouth. She hated that there was no other way.

The rain poured around her as she sat on the steps of the Metro and sobbed, hiding under her umbrella. She was sure he hated her now. What kind of girlfriend breaks up with her partner with no explanation? What kind of person just ends it like that?

A familiar voice jarred her from her thoughts.

“Marinette! Move!”

“A-Adrien?”

She turned to see Adrien running towards her, an unnaturally determined look on his face.

“Plagg, claws out!”

Marinette watched in shock as Cat Noir summoned his cataclysm and closed his hand over the purple butterfly that was inches from her face.

“Adrien!” She gasped. He smiled sadly at her.

“You were about to be akumatized, I didn’t have a choice, My Flower.”

Marinette stood there in shock. Then, with tears in her eyes, she dropped her umbrella and hugged her partner.

“Everything will be okay. I promise.” He whispered, sadness in his voice as he wrapped his arms around her.

They sat there for a long time. Cat Noir’s transformation faded out, but they kept holding onto each other as the rain poured around them.

“So... you knew?” she murmured. Adrien nodded.

“So did you.” he replied. Marinette bit her lip and hugged him tighter.

“I’m so sorry, I should have told you...” she sniffled, her tears leaking onto his shirt.

“Shhh... it’s okay. Everything will be fine, Marinette.”

“No, no... don’t say that, it’s only going to get worse from here...” she whispered.

“How?”

“W-what?”

“How is it going to get worse?” Marinette chewed her lip and and disentangled herself from his embrace. He let her, but still held onto her hand. “Marinette, please...”

“I-I can’t.” she said, finally, her voice shakey. Marinette let her hand slip out from his and she walked down the steps and into the Metro as Adrien watched, tears streaming down his face.

She didn’t even pick up her umbrella.

———————

(A/n okay, wow! I actually wrote this... okay. I have a second part in the works, but I don’t know if it’ll be finished anytime soon. So... thanks for reading and let me know if you have feedback!)

———————

(Edit: Part 2 is done! Read it here)

#this is the longest fanfic i've ever written #i had to take some creative liberties lol #mainly because canon DIDNT GIVE ME MANY SCENES TO WORK WITH #i love cat blanc but it really should have been a 2 parter #just sayin #i added more scenes because i want you to feel PAIN #also big thanks to my friend minimalist-dreamer for helping me!#check out their blog if you haven't already #chat blanc #cat blank #chat blank #cat blanc #scarlet lady au #sl au #marigold au

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darlinvandijk · 5 years ago

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Always been you

Concept: request where “Can you do an imagine where y/n and ruel are older and she decides she wants to go to college in LA ; they try the long distance relationship but it doesn’t work out bc she’s too busy with her studies meanwhile he becomes more popular and travels more often, but after 4 years she goes to one of his concerts and they reunite?”. Shoutout to my friend for giving me an idea to start this! Dm me and whatnot for a request!(really fucking long btw) Hope you enjoy :)

I sit by my phone frowning as I watch the FaceTime screen ring for a bit, before showing me that the call wasn’t answered. Looks like Ruel is busy, yet again. It’s not that I’m mad at him for not picking up, he has a job to do that takes up countless hours of his time, and I’m proud of the dedication he has when it comes to his career. I’m just upset that lately it seems like we never talk, he calls when I’m asleep or working, or I call when he’s asleep or working. It just seems like nothing is working for us, but I can’t not be with him, he’s my whole world. I finally clear my thoughts and stand up from my bed, making my way to my bathroom so I can have a relaxing shower, and hopefully come out to see a message from Ruel.

I make my way out of the bathroom in my favorite hoodie that I took from Ruel, jumping onto my bed to check my phone notifs, feeling my heart flutter at the text from “bubs <3”. I immediately click it, typing down a response as fast as I can, hoping he’s not busy or asleep yet. Luck is finally on my side when I get a response, mere seconds after I had sent mine.

Baby I’m so sorry, I would’ve answered but I was on stage

It’s okay bubs, how was the concert? I know how much you love Amsterdam :)

It was amazing! They were so into everything and I swear they knew lyrics to unreleased songs which was kinda wild.. wish u were here tho

I’m happy for you baby!! You know how your fans are, they find everything out lmao

Are you okay? You kinda ignored the last thing I said

I’m okay, sorry I just didn’t want to reply to it and get all emotional on you lol

I let out a shaky breath when I hit send, already feeling my built up emotions get ready to spill over, I just miss him so much. I see him typing for a couple of seconds, before the little bubble disappears, instantly replaced by my screen lighting up with an incoming FaceTime call. I hesitantly answer, making sure the hood on Ruels hoodie is covering my face a little, knowing it’s already getting splotchy from being so emotional. I watch as the screen lights up, with my beautiful boyfriend laying on his bed in the back of the bus, staring at me silently.

“Hey love, wanna remove that hood for me? I want to see that beautiful face of yours-” he quietly whispers out, not wanting to overwhelm me. He can read me like a book, which is how he can always tell when something’s wrong. I let out a quiet sigh, pulling the hood back, looking away from the phone so that I don’t have to see the look on his face. I hear him sigh out once he takes in my under eye bags, splotchy red face, and shiny eyes. He takes in a deep breath before asking the question he didn’t want to ask, “is this because of me?” He whispers out, his voice breaking with emotion. I stare at him with wide eyes, shocked by the question, and also unsure on how to reply to it.

“No! You didn’t do anything wrong, I’m just a little touchy today.” I instantly blurt out, not wanting him to feel bad, because I already know he’s thinking about all the missed calls we’ve had. More than we could count just this week. He watches me, giving me an unconvinced look, running a hand roughly through his hair. We’re both silent for a little bit, trying to figure out what was so different about this phone call compared to others, because this tension floating through the air has never happened before, I’m more unnerved than I’ve ever been with him.

“I know that’s not true. I know it’s getting to you, all the missed calls and late replies. It’s getting to me too. I just don’t know how to fix it baby, but trust me when I say I’m trying to.” He whimpers out, causing my eyes to water even more at his obvious distress. I send him a watery smile and place a kiss to my promise ring, watching as he sends me a small smile while placing a kiss to the necklace he wears for me. It’s a silver pendant with my first initial, he got it the same time he gave me this ring, which was over a year ago on our second anniversary together.

“I love you, even if things have been a little difficult lately. School has just been taking up so much of my time lately and it’s hard to find times to talk when you’re in a whole other country. It’s not your fault and it’s not mine, life just has a crazy way of handling things I guess” I mumble out, watching him nod his head, reaching a hand up to wipe his eyes of the unwanted tears. I wipe my eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie, only to look back at the screen, seeing him with a completely shattered expression. I freeze and practically stop breathing, scared of what he was about to say to me. A choked sob escapes him, tears making their way down his face as he holds onto the pendant dangling in front of his chest.

“You know I love you, right? You’re my whole world, my soulmate, my everything. I wouldn’t do anything if I didn’t think it’d benefit you.” He chokes out, his eyes blurry with tears as I stare at him with my own tears pouring down my face. I’m instantly filled with fear when I see the way he’s acting, because he’s never like this, which means whatever it about to happen is going to hurt me the same way it’s hurting him. I breathe in shakily, spinning the promise ring around my finger, giving him a small nod before getting the courage to talk.

“I know you do, I love you too. We’ve always been soulmates and always will be. You’re it for me, there will never be anyone else.” I cry out, feeling like I’m saying a goodbye rather than reassuring him. He nods his head frantically, showing me that he agrees with my statement completely. I watch him open his mouth to speak, before another cry rips out from his throat, one that sounds completely and utterly heartbroken. I immediately wince upon hearing it, feeling my heart spike as I realize what he was leading up to, as I realize the what he’s about to do for the both of us. I’m unable to open my mouth to talk, completely losing my mind as I sob and shake my head no, hoping it’s enough to stop him before he says it. It didn’t work.

“I love you. I love you so much that I’m doing this for you, I’m doing it for the both of us. I’m breaking up with you, I’m so sorry baby.” He sobs out, feeling like he lost the one thing that ever truly mattered to him. The one thing that he’d give his career up for. I sit there completely frozen, unable to comprehend the words that just came out of his mouth, before my body shakes with the sobs I let out. I feel my chest physically ache like someone tried to rip my heart out, instantly reaching my hands up to hold my chest in hopes of easing the pain. I knew that heartbreak sucked, I just never knew how much it’d actually hurt.

“Please.. please don’t do this. I love you Ruel. I need you.” I cry out, my voice sounding so unattached from me, that I barely even register the words coming out. He watches me as tears and sobs shake his body, taking in everything about me for what he knows will be the last time for awhile. I watch the way his red rimmed green eyes flit over me through the screen, drinking me in with all that he can. Not even realizing my eyes are doing the same through their teary filled gaze.

“I love you baby, I love you with all I’ve got. I’m doing this for you, you need to focus on school and working for everything you’ve ever dreamed of. I don’t want you to miss out on living your life over there just because I can’t be with you. I’m only getting in the way of that, which means I need to let you go.” He whispers out, our tears having finally been drained from our bodies, leaving us in a broken silence. I don’t reply for a second, only hearing the shaky breathing we’re both releasing, before I come to terms with the fact that he won’t change his mind about this.

“I love you too. Promise you won’t forget about me? No matter what happens, you can’t forget about me-“ I whisper out, watching the pained look on his face when my voice cracks. He gives me a shaky smile, his eyes filled with disbelief at my question. He opens his mouth to respond, but I beat him to it, not fully done with my requests. “and I’ll always be your best friend right? Like you’ll like all my insta posts still and you’ll always tell me happy birthday?” I whimper out, knowing that the requests might sound dumb, but he’ll understand what I mean. He gives me the same boyish grin I fell in love with, a few stray tears making their way down his puffy face.

“Baby I could never forget about you, you’re my whole world. You’ll be my best friend till the day I die, I’ll like all your posts as soon as you post them, since I have notifs for you, and I’ll tell you happy birthday at 12 like I do every time. I promise with everything inside of me.” He states, trying to make his voice as strong as possible, but still not being able to fully hide the tremors that shake his voice. I give him a smile, knowing how terrible I must look right now, but not caring as I gaze at the beautiful boy who will always hold my heart in his hands.

“One last thing... promise you’ll love me forever?” I choke out, feeling the way the call was on its way towards ending, wanting to hold on to any last bit of him for as long as I could. He lets out a exasperated scoff at my question, not even knowing where to start with it.

“I’ll love you till the day I die and even after that. Our love is eternal sweetheart, no matter what we’ll always make our way back to each other. I promise.” He states with so much conviction, leaving no room to even question him. I nod my head and watch him, feeling my heart break all over again as I realize it’s time to say goodbye. It’s time to say goodbye to the love of my life. To my best friend. We spend a few minutes staring at each other, not wanting to deal with the inevitable outcome of ending this call.

“This isn’t a goodbye, it’s just a see you later, okay? We’ll be together again, but not till the times right for us. I’m not giving up on you. I love you.” He breathily lets out, staring into my eyes with nothing but pure love in his eyes. I whimper as he finishes his sentence, feeling my heart officially tear into two, knowing this was it. I wipe my eyes hastily, not wanting to miss the last seconds I have with him, wanting to look at him one last time before we end this call.

“I won’t give up on you either, I’ll see you later. I love you.” I whisper out, watching the way he looks me over one final time. We send each other heartbroken smiles as I kiss my ring and he kisses his necklace, neither of us knowing when we’ll be together again. He gives me a small wave while blowing a tiny kiss to the screen before the call disconnects, leaving me completely shattered.

———

Days seemed to pass by slower than ever, all filled with endless calls from the Van Dijk family, excluding the one person I wanted to call me the most. The breakup hurt their family almost as much as it hurt me, endless amounts of tears over FaceTime calls as the girls and Kate called me, not believing that we would ever break up. The moment they saw my puffy eyes and tear streaked face I could almost hear their hearts break, but slowly time seemed to heal my wounds. I wouldn’t say fully healed even if it’s been 2 years, but healed enough to where I can look at pictures of us without it ripping my heart out. This morning when I woke up, I saw that he had sent me a birthday message at 12, just like he always does and promised to continue doing so, leaving me a teary eyed mess from missing him.

Today I was meeting up with Coco and Sylvie for my birthday brunch, since the two flew down to Los Angeles to spend some time with me during my college holiday break. I stood in front of my mirror, putting on my final touches of makeup, and adjusting my clothes. Once I felt ready to leave, I walk out of my apartment and head down the street, to the small pastry shop the girls wanted to meet at.

As I walk in, I feel my stomach fill with excitement, ready to see the two girls who I love more than myself. Before I can even spot them, I hear Coco shriek, immediately running to pull me into a bone crushing hug. As soon as she lets me go so that I can breathe, I end up pulled into another tight hug, watching her laugh as Sylvie practically strangled me. Sylvie pulls away and drags me to the table they have, having already ordered for all of us since they know my order by heart after being so close all these years. They cheer out their happy birthdays to me once we sit down, handing me the gifts they bought me before they both look at me from across the table, with matching grins but what appears to be a slight hesitant look in their eyes.

“Spill the tea, I can tell by the looks on your faces you have something to say” I laugh out, watching as Coco roll her eyes. I give them a reassuring smile, hoping to ease their nerves on whatever they have to say, but feeling a pit form in my stomach since I know it probably has to do with the person I still haven’t moved on from. Sylvie takes in a deep breathe, reaching out to grab my hand that’s on the table, giving it a light squeeze. I’m immediately on edge at her actions, my mind instantly jumping to the worst conclusions, the first one being that he got a new girlfriend. Let’s just say I was completely wrong with my assumptions.

“Have you moved on?” Sylvie blurts out, completely throwing me off, because they would be the first two to know if I ever did. I stare at them with wide eyes, not sure on how to reply to the question, because there’s obviously a reason they’d have brought that up. I open and close my mouth a few times as I try to come up with something to say. The looks on their faces become more uneased at my lack of a response, causing me to blurt our the last thing I’d want to say.

“How can I move on when I check your brothers insta at least once every hour?-” I spill out, watching their faces instantly switch to those of amusement. I let out a groan at my embarrassing confession, covering my face as it heats up, praying that the ground will just swallow me whole. I uncover my face so that I can try and salvage what’s left of my dignity, “what I meant was that I haven’t moved on to anyone else, like the first thing I did when I woke up was check to see if he sent me a message. Why would you think I did?” I question them. I watch as both sets of eyes travel to the neckline of shirt, before they slowly trail back to my eyes, both with perplexed expressions.

“It’s just that your necklace is off, like you haven’t taken that necklace off ever, but all of a sudden it’s not on you?” Coco slowly states, immediately causing my hand to fly up to my neck, feeling my shirt rather than the promise ring, meaning that my necklace was indeed missing from my body. I let out a groan as I realize I had left it in my bathroom, having had taken it off before my shower earlier, and not putting it back on when I left. The necklace only ever leaves my body when I shower, meaning that it’s permanent residence is right against my chest, the same place the promise ring has layer ever since our breakup.

“Fuck, I never put it back on after my shower. It’s on the counter of the bathroom, I must’ve forgot it since I was so excited about seeing you guys” I mumble out, feeling like I was missing part of me without the ring, especially on a day like today. The girls give me sympathetic looks, knowing how much it means to me, especially since it’s the only thing I have that really connects me to Ruel. The girls swiftly change the conversation and talk about some of the gossip going around, before deciding we should just head back to my place.

Once we get back to my place we all sit down on my couch, their eyes wandering around and checking out some of the new things I’ve added since the last time they visited, softly smiling as they see I still have pictures of Ruel and I around. Coco grabs a frame and sends me a sad smile, her eyes looking over the photo fondly, what just so happened to be my favorite picture of us. The picture is one of my fondest memories of when Ruel and I were still together, we were all hanging out together on the beach, and Sylvie had snapped a pic when we weren’t paying attention. Our skin was glowing in the orange light from the sunset while he looked down at me with a lovestruck grin and I was laughing at something Kate had said, as I lay sprawled across his lap. I don’t think I’d ever been happier than I was at that moment.

“I miss you guys being together, but I know you’ll find your ways back to each other. You have to” Coco whispers out, with teary eyes as she thinks about the pain Ruel and I had gone through with the breakup, and the pain she knows we’re still feeling without each other. Sylvie nods her head while humming in agreement with her sister, silently praying that things work out soon, knowing her brother hasn’t been the same since everything happened between us. I give them a small shrug, my own eyes tearing up, knowing what they want won’t happen anytime soon, and I was right.

———

“You have got to be fucking with me?” I groan out, having just listened to the plans Coco just dragged me into. I hear her let out a sigh of frustration, annoyed that her plan wasn’t working out the way she had hoped, and knowing she was silently cursing me in her head. I hear Sylvie mumbling something to her in the background, before hearing Kate and Michelle make noises of agreement. I instantly tense up once she starts talking again, knowing that there was no way out of these plans she had set up.

“You promised you’d see us all tonight since it’s been a few months, you can’t break a promise. Please I promise it’ll be fun, please?” She states out, her tone becoming slightly pleading towards the end. I let out a sigh, running a hand down my face as I think about what would happen if I went. Like she has to understand why I don’t want to go, this isn’t going to just affect only me. I hear silence on the other line, knowing they’re crowded around the phone, waiting for me to answer, I take a deep breath before speaking up.

“Guys this isn’t only going to affect me. We were supposed to all see each other, you never said it would be at a concert. Let alone at fucking Ruels concert. I don’t think I can” I mutter out, feeling my heart constrict at the thought of him. It might’ve been 4 years since the breakup, but that doesn’t mean my heart doesn’t still hurt when I think of him. We’ve talked since the breakup, but it’s only ever been for birthdays, some holidays, and random messages here and there to say we hope the other is doing well. All in all, we’ve basically not legitimately interacted since the breakup, because I don’t think either of us could ever be just friends with each other. Trying to be friends would only hurt us.

“Please, I wouldn’t have you go if I knew it would hurt him. I love you both too much to do something that could harm either of you, please just trust me on this. He’d want you there.” She softly states, knowing how sensitive this topic was becoming the more I thought of him. I let out a quiet groan, before quietly agreeing to go with them. I hear them let out cheers, all of them ecstatic at the fact that they were able to get me to agree to go. Completely oblivious to the plan they had made, the plan that I set into action by agreeing to go.

“Yes! See you soon babes, love you” Coco shrieks, barely letting me reply before hanging up. I sigh as I stare at my blank screen, fiddling with my ring as it lays against my chest, before heading to my room to get ready for the events taking place in a little bit. I start doing my hair, thinking about all the possibilities tonight holds, like the thought of being face to face with him seems unreal, I can only hope he doesn’t feel uncomfortable with me being there.

I hum along to my playlist as I move on to my makeup, before freezing as a familiar tune starts playing. I listen as the beginning of painkiller fills my room, the memories from when this song was first written coming to the front of my mind. He had been nervously watching me as I lay across his bed, before hesitantly speaking up to tell me he wrote me a song, and of course I eagerly told him to sing it. I remember when he first started, I was completely enamored by him, feeling my eyes well up as I listened to the lyrics. That day was the first time we had said I love you to each other, when we both truly realized how much we meant to each other. That song means more to me than anything else in the world, it’s not just the song that’s important to me, but the day that means everything to me.

I clear my throat, dabbing at my eyes to get rid of any unwanted moisture, as I finally come back to my senses when the song finishes. I let out a sigh, continuing on with my makeup, before finally finishing up. I check my phone and see that Coco will be getting me in 20 minutes to head out, instantly causing me to rush around to find an outfit. While he probably feels nothing for me after so much time, I still want to at least look decent when we cross paths again. I get my clothes on and look at myself in the mirror, before deciding it’s good enough. I head out of my apartment and walk out, instantly spotting Coco standing outside a car waiting for me. I run over to her, instantly embracing her in a tight hug, having missed her more than anything the past couple months it’s been since I saw her last.

“Ready for tonight?” She questions with a look in her eyes that I can’t decipher, but immediately puts me on edge. I narrow my eyes as I look at her, trying to gauge her emotions, because Coco isn’t Coco without some sort of insane plan. She stares at me with doe eyes, appearing completely innocent, while she waits for me to reply to her.

“I don’t know, it’s been 4 years Co. Like that’s a long time and I don’t want to burden him you know” I whisper out, glancing out the window while feeling insecure at the thought of him possibly not wanting to even see me. Coco rolls her eyes at the back of my head, knowing that Ruel is still just as in love with me as he was when we were still together. She puts her hand on my knee and lets me think for the remainder of the car ride, while she tries to hide the smirk on her face, knowing the plan she had was going to work out perfectly on the unsuspecting pair.

We pull into the venue, getting escorted through the back entrance by security guards so that the fans couldn’t see either of us. I’m thankful the fans couldn’t see us because of the fact that they’d recognize me immediately, and start rumors on social media, even though there have been plenty of them since we broke up. Especially since he still likes all my insta posts and comments on them every now and then, fueling the fans to believe that the breakup wasn’t real. The real fans know it was though, they could sense the instant change and shift in us, no matter how hard we tried to act happy and fine on our socials for them. Little did I know, Coco was happy the fans couldn’t see me since it would fuck up her plan, because Ruel would basically be instantly notified of my presence.

We walk through hallways backstage before Coco leads me into a small room, where I’m instantly pulled into hug by Kate. She rocks us side to side, holding me as tight as she can, while the girls stand around with teary eyes watching the interaction. We finally pull away from the hug, Kate putting her hand on my face as she watches me with a look of pure motherly adoration, instantly making my eyes water with emotion.

“My other baby is finally back” Kate whispers out, the grin never leaving her face, feeling complete that all her girls and her son were finally in one place again. Kate has always called me one of her baby’s or her daughter, because she said I was destined to be her daughter in-law so why not just start early. I let out a small laugh at the way Coco and Sylvie have their phones out to record, before walking over to give Sylvie a hug. We pull away and she compliments my outfit, before pushing me into the arms of Michelle. I let out a laugh as Michelle whispers that if I ever disappear for 4 years again, she’d kill Ruel and I for doing that to everyone again. We pull away from the hug and stand around conversing with each other about anything and everything, before the door opens and someone walks in.

“Oh you little fucking shit-” He laughs out as I turn my head, just to be pulled into a bone crushing hug by Nate. I laugh as he squeezes me, before letting me go to give me a stern look, causing me to smirk at him knowing he’s about to lecture me. I watch as he takes a deep breathe, getting mentally prepared for whatever he’s about to say, “you don’t understand the hell I had to deal with the past four years, I’ve almost strangled him a good couple of times. Does he know you’re here?” He groans out at first, before ending with an intrigued look. I shake my head at his question, causing him to look at the girls in surprise, completely unaware of the mission they were on. I see Michelle give him a look, causing him to smile and give her a slight nod, leaving me perpelexed on what everyone seemed to be planning.

“Well he’s doing soundcheck right now, so I got to go check on him, because I don’t trust him. Like I don’t care if he’s 21, he’s still not trustworthy enough to be alone without me” Nate groans with an eye roll, causing us all to laugh at the mischief Ruel causes, my heart clenching since it was one of the things I fell in love with about him. Nate sends me one last smile before heading out, leaving us in the room together yet again. I watch as Coco sends Kate a look, before turning to me with a blinding grin on her face. I instantly tense up knowing she has to be up to something, there’s no other reason she’d have a smile on her face like that.

“So Kate and Michelle have to go see Ruel to just to check in on him, Sylvie wants to go find a vending machine for something to drink, and I need to find a bathroom to fix my makeup in” she explains, watching the way my eyes wander over her flawless face, seeing no reason for her to fix the makeup. Before I can question her, I’m already being pulled out of the room, and down a series of hallways. She stops outside of a light brown door, throwing it open and pushing me inside with her. I try to look around to see what room we’re in, but Coco immediately starts talking, completely distracting me from even trying to look around.

“Can you help me fix my lipstick, I feel like it’s getting on my teeth, and check the lining of it please” she practically begs, causing me to nod my head with a laugh. She hands me a q-tip from the table next to her and I instantly get to work, completely transfixed on the task at hand. I wipe around the inner lining of her lips, making sure it’s still perfect but not too far back to get on her teeth, because who wants red stained teeth. Next I move on to the outline of her lips, lightly trying to straighten certain areas, praying I won’t drag it onto her foundation. As I’m fixing her lipstick, her phone buzzes, causing her to pull away from me abruptly. I let out a surprised gasp, instantly narrowing my eyes at the look on her face, since she seemed ready to combust.

“Wait right here, I have to go grab my lip liner, I forgot to put some on, and don’t want my lipstick to just disappear over the duration of tonight. Don’t move, I’ll be right back” she all but shrieks out, jogging out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her. I stand there watching the door, perplexed on what everyone seemed to be planning for me, before deciding to take a look around the room. I walk over to the desk, looking over some of the trinkets laying there, before the door is thrown open and someone’s shouting.

“Why are you shoving me in here? Coco don’t make me bite you lil bitch, Nate stop groping me for fucks sake” I hear an overly familiar Australian voice yell, watching the scuffling take place, before he finally gets shoved in and the door slams shut. I stand there frozen, comeplety in shock by the boy in front of me, my heart feeling like it might burst out of my chest. I stay silent as he bangs on the door, before spinning around with an eye roll when he realizes the doors blocked, only to freeze upon seeing me. We stay silent, both of us just staring at each other, taking in all the changes from growing up, and taking in all the familiar things we fell in love with about each other.

“It’s been a while, yeah?” He mumbles out, playing with his fingers anxiously. I lightly scuff my shoe on the ground, too nervous to make eye contact with him right now, especially when I know my feelings for him never went away. I nod my head and continue to stare at my shoes, before looking up when he moves to stand in front of me. We make direct eye contact when I look up, his green eyes filled with an emotion I couldn’t quite decipher, but felt oddly familiar.

“It’s been four really fucking long years, which means we got some catching up to do after this concert, but uh only if you want to. I would love it if you did” he questions, giving me a anxious smile, it slowly dropping when I hesitate to answer. As soon as I see his smile drop and his eyes dim, I immediately reach out and place my hand on his arm, watching the way his eyes widen at the contact.

“Yeah, I would really like that.” I softly state, watching him give me a boyish grin, instantly causing my face to heat up as I look away. Upon noticing my head turn away, he smirks at my blush and takes the opportunity to look at my outfit, his eyes instantly locking on the neckline of my top. I turn my head back to him to ask him a question, when I notice his eyes locked on my top, before I can ask what he’s looking at, he reaches a hand out. I freeze as his hand grabs on to my chain, sliding his fingers along it until the promise ring he gave me lands in his fingers. He twirls it around, completely entranced by it, and completely oblivious to how close we’d gotten to each other. I open my mouth to come up with an excuse as to why I’m wearing it, only to be left shocked when he gives me a teary grin, reaching underneath his own shirt, pulling out the pendant. I let out a quiet sob when I see the little silver pendant, only to be pulled straight into the arms of the boy I’ve loved my whole life. He holds me and rocks us back and forth, one hand pressed to the back of my head, the other wrapped around my shoulders.

“I kept all my promises. Told you I wasn’t going to give up on you.” He whispers in my ear as I hold him as tight as I can, never wanting to let him go. He pulls away from me and cups my cheek with his hand, before leaning down and pressing a light kiss to my forehead. He rests his forehead against mine for a few seconds, just taking in the moment while it lasts, before we’re both startled by the door flinging open. He immediately pushes me behind him, but the two had already seen all they needed to see.

“I KNEW IT WOULD WORK” Coco screeches, causing Nate to flinch as he stands with her, having came to collect Ruel since it was time to go on stage. Ruel rolls his eyes, but still has a lovesick smile on his face, before instinctively grabbing my hand and pulling me with him out the door. We walk hand in hand to where the stage is, hearing the thousands of fans out there screaming and chanting for him to come out, before coming to a stop next to the stairs for the stage. He looks at our hands before blushing and dropping them, leaving me there with a confused and slightly hurt expression. Upon seeing my face he instantly panics and starts rushing to explain himself.

“It’s not that I don’t want to hold your hand, I just don’t want to rush straight into things after a four year break. Trust me, it’s taking everything inside of me to not just jump back into how we used to be” he groans out, I laugh and grab his hand, really noticing how his hand still fits in mine perfectly. I get a little lost in thought, but come back when Ruel gives my hand a squeeze, just like what he would do back in the day.

“I get it, I want to rebuild everything too... I really missed you, like I never moved on from you.” I whisper out, before Ruel pulls me in, holding me tight against him. He places a light kiss on top of my head, before holding me for a little longer. Nate comes over and tells him he has about a minute until he needs to go up, causing him to groan, not wanting to leave me when he just got me back. I laugh and pull myself out of his arms, tilting my head up to look straight into his eyes.

“I never moved on from you either, I couldn’t. I told you we’d find the way when the time was right” he smirks out, causing me to roll my eyes, trust him to make a sweet situation cocky. He laughs at my attitude, before giving me one last squeeze, and holding his hand out. I look at it before sending him a giant smile, already knowing what he wanted to do. Neither of us noticed, but Michelle and everyone came to stand and watch, as Ruel and I did our pre-concert ritual. It was a handshake we had made as children, but kept adding on to the older we got. We finish it off, with the usual pinky promise, both of us kissing the opposite end, before he quickly kisses my cheek and bounds up the stairs. I stand there in shock, holding my blushing cheek, before turning my head to the girls who all hold knowing smirks.

“Looks like he added another thing to the ritual” Coco laughs out, causing me to roll my eyes, turning to watch Ruel from the side stage. He welcomes the crowd and starts to sing, the fans instantly singing every word, and watching him like he put the stars in the sky. After the first song, he turns to the band and asks them to pause really fast, making all of us confused, since this was not a planned break.

“I’m sorry if I’m a little jumpy today, or if I’m just a complete mess. I just got to reunite with the girl I’ve been in love with since I was a kid after four years apart, so yeah I am a mess-” he starts off, looking over to me with a large smile. I instantly blush and grin back at him, overwhelmed that he still feels the same way about me after all this time. The crowd starts screaming my name and chanting out the ship name they created for us way before we even got together, causing everyone to start laughing. Ruel glances over at me again as he starts talking, “I told you it wasn’t a goodbye, it was just a see you later. Even the fans knew I was never going to get over you, I honestly didn’t even want anyone else. It’s always been you.” He mumbles out. The fans instantly screaming as loud as they can, while I stand there in awe, tears streaming down my face. He jogs over and gives me a hug, before promising to spend all his time on catching up with me after the concert, leaving me there to sing my heart out to the songs that were written by the boy I love.

That night, I rekindled a love that was never lost, but rather put on hold. I know we said we’d take it a little slow, but that night I slept in the arms of the love of my life, feeling like I was whole again for the first time in years. I felt the overwhelming love I have for him completely fill me to the brim, because he’s not only my best friend, but he’s my soulmate. It’s always been him.

#ruelvincentvandijk #ruel van dijk #one ruel #ruel #ruel imagines #ruel imagine #ruel one shot #imagines #imagine #one shot #x reader #free time ep #ruel fanfic

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shaekingshitup · 4 years ago

Text

Shae’s First Date

For anyone who is bored: the most brief (that I can recap because ya girl is a lengthy heaux) summary of my first date goes as follows:

EDIT: THIS SHIT AIN'T BRIEF. SORRY NOT SORRY 🤷🏿‍♀️🤷🏿‍♀️ But I put a TLDR at the end.

I matched with a guy on Bumble who had some cool hobbies and some of which overlapped with mine. We talked daily for almost 2 weeks before we met up in person and the guy was a very big charmer/woo-er. Like if I was messaging this kid I was constantly laughing and smiling

Tbh this was a lil bit of a red flag to me becauae I'm like: "no one is this charming. Something has gotta be up" & I legit came up with a few different scenarios. But I chose to shelf them because people do that to me all the time.

Like I'm just a really loving person and I will gas people up or go out of my way to make them happy if I can and people always want to try me like that can't truly be how/who I am or if I'm doing it it's because I'm trying to get at that person and they are always wrong. All the way from best friends to new acquaintances I really just like when people are happy. I mean the world's shitty already, if I can make your day easier or put smile on your face I'm game!

So we're on the phone one night (stayed up to 3 am sacrificing my sleep talking to this dude 🙄) talking more about who we are as people, what we're looking for in an ideal partner, etc. I told him straight up both via call and via message that honesty is really important to me. I value honesty with myself and also with others.

So also in this late night call things got a lil spicy 🌶 🌶 I was honest and told him that I'm pretty much a blank slate. Never fucked/sucked, etc or had anything like that done to me. He was taken aback like everyone I share this with is. Apparently I'm some sort of unicorn 🦄 out here in these streets to all y'all hoes. He makes a comment about stealing a kiss from me the next night and I said "I might allow it."

But the point is. I told him what it was. I was honest. That's my truth.

I didn't tell him that I'd never been on a date/kissed anyone because he didn't ask. Maybe if I would've said something, things would've been different. But I can't "what if" what's already happened y'all!

SO, day of. We messagin and snapping. I'm allll ready. We're going to a drive in and I'd never been to one before so I'm excited. I'm also just committed to making this a good time because I easily get distracted and often don't stop to take my experiences in to experience them fully. So I said not today!!

I got snacks. All of his favs and some of mine. I brought drinks and a blanket. I looked good.

Like I said in my pre-date post: I didn't have any lofty ideas about this dude being my soul mate or anything but I anticipated a good time.

He picked me up at our designated location. My sister met him and got his license plate; because apparently I had enough sense to realize I didn't know this nigga but not enough sense to later realize I didn't know this nigga.

It wasn't gonna take as long to get to the drive in as originally anticipated. So we went to a local park and sat in the car and talked because the park was PACKED and ya know RONA!

It was somewhat awkward because it was our first time talking face to face. But we found a groove and I'm extroverted af y'all. So, I can get people to have a conversation.

Topics range from our days, music and conspiracy theories which he's really into. What kind? Like: Shakespeare wrote the Bible is one. A lot of people that we know from media aren't really the original ones that we were introduced to is another. Ya know like that Beyoncé is not the real Beyoncé. There's two Trumps. There's two Hilary Clintons etc.

So at this point sensible me is like: this can be the point where you go home girl. You're 5 minutes away from your place. You can just say this ain't workin and cut it short.

OPTIMISTIC/BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT GIVIN/NAIVE SILLY ME IS LIKE: well, I 100% don't agree with anything you're saying just because you're saying it. But ya know, I don't know everything and I'm not in the business of judging people-especially since we just met and I don't want this human to feel uncomfortable. So, okay. I don't agree. But I won't judge. Let's just continue on.

If you haven't guessed by now which me I listened to, you may be just as silly as I am 🙃🙃🙃

But obviously I continued on and that's what I call mistake #1

So we're driving to the drive in. I'm realizing we're kind of different in ways. Most notable is that dude was raised Jehovah's Witnesses and celebrates 0 holidays & I'm in love with Halloween and at least birthdays.

We miss the drive in entrance due to my poor navi skills & he decides to smoke before we pull in. He offers it to me and I accept. This is mistake #2

Ya girl hasn't smoked in 6 years. I tried edibles recently. But that shit ain't the same. I really just feel like I said I wanted to be present and then I smoked and I was tired and everything was kind of dull?

So I'm high and sleepy but still a lil excited because it's my first drive in!! We get there and park and the drive in is really just a giant protection screen we all park in front of. Lmao. 😅 Idk what I was expectin but not that. But it was still cool. It's 10 and this movie still hasn't started because the last one is still showin credits.

Dude says he wants to chill in the back but he's going to the bathroom. I AM SLEEPY. THAT IS WHAT WEED DOES TO ME. Plus I was on the phone til 3 AM. So I'm like imma close my eyes before this thing starts since it's already late.

So while he goes to the bathroom I legit laid down in the back on a pillow because ya girl is a sleepy heaux 😴

He comes back and pits the pillow in his lap and is talking to me because this movie ain't started yet. My eyes are closed but I'm listening and everything and he's massaging my shoulders and whatnot. Eventually advertisements about common courtesy come on and what not. But that's not important and I don't move.

Soo he says something I'M ASSUMING IT WAS ABOUT THE KISS (I don't remember y'all. I'm about to skimp on some of these details because that high was really kickin in and I was feelin foggy.) But, I said "I would allow it." And he kissed me.

It honestly felt anticlimactic as fuck. Yeah my mind is kind of foggy because of the weed so I feel like I wasn't as fully cognizant as I would have been if I was sober minded. But also, it just happened

I'm in my head af. I've never done this and I'm sure I'm shit at it but I'm trying not to be ya know? Dude's tongue is in my mouth. His hand is under my romper.

So, I'm a roll with the punches kind of human and the rest of the film we pretty much are making out (lowkey meh), groping (I hate this word) & watching Deadpool ( for people who needed that detail)

As previously stated, all of this shit is new to me. But, I'm also not a "prude". I chose not to kiss/fuck anyone prior to this because it was what I wanted for a period of time. I couldn't do much in the date department because I was just not approached often or by people I wanted to entertain. But the opportunities for all that physical shit were presented and I chose not to just like I chose to engage in those activities on this date. I'm real big on not judging nor regretting those choices because those were what I wanted at one point and that's it. Soo if you got opinions about what I was out here doin, keep em to yaself.

We ended up making out and I feel like it was cool.. but just not great. We did other shit minus actual fucking. But it all just felt pretty muted to me. Not bad. Not uncomfortable. Just not great and I think in hindsight it was because I a) really didn't know and have an established connection with this dude and b) I was high.

He really wanted me to suck his dick and I was really hesitant to do that. Not even that much because I was checking off a lot of "firsts' or anything like that but because I swore I was gonna be shit at it due to 0 experience and that was what I told him. Like, I wanna be good at shit and also I would like if the person I was hooking up with was actually enjoying being with me ya know? Is that not a thing? Y'all just be out here tryna get ya nut and say fuck it to whomever you with? Lemme be a unicorn then. 🦄

But anyways, I did this and he says like nothing. I'm in my head af trying to recall upon all of my BP smut I've read and trying not to suck at sucking (SO THANKS TO ALL OF Y'ALL WHO BE WRITING SMUT!!). After a few minutes the car turns off and Ryan Reynold's ain't talking anymore. Sooo I take this as a sign that I should stop and tell him as much.

He turns the car back on so we can still hear the movie & I'm pretty much like half watching the movie and talking to him like: "Soooo. I did that and I feel like I was right." To which he responds, "I've had worse," which is like ya know the compliment of the century and the most reassuring feedback you can give someone who is insecure about shit they've never done.

We still ended up making out and I gave him a handjob and finished the movie. I can't recall if it was at this point or when he drove me home but he basically implied that I was a liar and that is the shit that literally makes me wanna go back in time and tell former me to never say yes to a date with this nigga.

He drove me home and I was pretty quiet listening to Ari Lennox (💕) and thinking/processing. He gets to my place and we're talking now that we're parked and tells me that he thought I probably wasn't right about never having sex before. He told me I probably just had sex like 3 years ago and it had been so long that's why I said that and that's why my pussy is so tight.

So, I'm real life hurt. I like to consider myself to be someone who has a good character and I am really big on honesty.

So I asked him why he said that if I told him from jump what it was. He told me that his ex lied a lot and that he just couldn't believe me..

And I know for certain that his assumption was independent of any of my actions. He literally just told me so. He projected his insecurities onto me. But I'm a sensitive ass heaux and that shit still shook me. PBS raised me right. I don't be out here lyin & I don't like when people try to tell me who tf I am.

We pretty much just ended up arguing about the night and he was doing it on purpose because he thinks it's sexy when women are mad. But when I get mad, I get done. If I let enough shit slide and you have the audacity to try and flip my script, I will fucking write you out of it.

Then I looked up at the time and realized I was sitting in this car arguing with nigga for at least 25 minutes. So I was just like: bitch, why are you still here?

I told him straight up that when I got out of that car he could forget about talking to me altogether and he was like: "I'll let you know when I make it home."

I told him he need not bother because apparently I'd finally gained some damn sense. I exited the car. He left. He hit me up when he made it home but I just deleted the app and removed him off of snap because I meant that shit.

TLDR; Went on my first date with a conspiracy theorist I matched with on Bumble and he told me I lied about my lack of sexual history.

#bumble #first date #drive in #story time #short stime #i need my mutuals to pray for me #because lordt #deadpool #ryan reynolds #ari lennox #personal #mine #big time sigh #im sorry I can't add the keep reading tab on mobile tk!

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formalmess · 5 years ago

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For Your Entertainment ~ Chapter One

Summary: Luigi receives a mysterious letter.

Warnings: N/A

A/N: Welcome to the show! This is a dark little horror-esque story I wrote and finished up last year, and since it’s the month of spookiness, what better time than now to post it here? It may be a bit familiar to some people since I’ve published it elsewhere before, but I have changed and polished up some things since it’s publication last year. To the newcomers, welcome! Fair warning in advance though, this story will get darker. Keep an eye out for warnings in the future. But until then and without further ado, enjoy!

“Mail call!” Parakarry’s voice eagerly called out through the morning air.

He flapped his wings before landing, stretching out his arms and wings before reaching into his mailbag. He opened the mailbox outside the manor before him, whistling as he dug through his bag for the mail meant for this house.

He craned his neck, turning up to look at the green manor situated just up a small hill, a stone path leading to the front door. The quaint manor was certainly not the most extravagant of living spaces, but it was suitable. There was a well maintained garden gracing the front lawn, flowers of all colors, shapes, and sizes displayed upon the path.

Parakarry wiped the sweat off his brow, readying himself to fly off again when a voice called out.

“Good morning, Parakarry!”

Parakarry stopped, turning.

The owner of the manor appeared, rushing down the stone path to greet the Paratroopa with a smile on his face. The brunette’s hair was messy, his mustache uncombed as visible dark circles became apparent under his bright blue eyes. He had most likely just crawled out of bed.

“Ah, Luigi! Good to see you’re chipper today.” Parakarry grinned, watching as Luigi rushed up to the fence lining the yard, leaning against it.

“How’re you doing today, Parakarry?”

“I’m doing quite well. A bit frazzled, but quite well.”

“A lot of stuff to deliver today, huh?”

“That’s not even the half of it.” Parakarry chuckled. “The post office has been chaos since this morning. Postmaster said there was this little toad girl running around the office asking the rest of the employees about something. She’d been there since we opened. Totally threw him for a loop.”

“Do you know who she was?”

“No idea. The Postmaster thinks she was handing out fliers for something, I don’t know. He was already ordering me to get my tail out here, I didn’t have time to ask.”

“Oh, well, you’re right on schedule, I’d say.” Luigi laughed.

“I’d like to think I’m getting much better at delivering the mail on time.” Parakarry chuckled, slightly embarrassed. “If you happen to find anything in your mail is missing, that’s probably my fault… But, I’ll be sure to drop anything I missed off later, once I finish my route for today.”

“Well, don’t work too hard. Can I get you anything before you head off, Parakarry? I could get you a drink or something…”

“Oh, no. I’m in fine shape. Just have a long day ahead of me. There’s been a lot more letters coming in recently, which I hypothesize has something to do with that get-together the princess has been planning.”

“It’s only a meeting, Parakarry. I don’t think it’s that exciting.” Luigi smiled. “No one’s gonna be sending letters out to their grandparents about some king or prince coming to the Mushroom Kingdom to discuss economics with the princess.”

“Well, Toad Town gets excited over the littlest things, you know. Whether that be royalty figures getting together for, say… a ball, or a meeting, or a conference, or even for... tea time, really!”

“They’re just gonna be talking about trade negotiations and stuff like that. It’s all boring.”

“Oh, right, I’m sorry. I forgot you knew so much about the princess’s business ever since you and that prince got hitched… Your Highness.” Parakarry sneered, bowing playfully. “You’re going to be at the meeting anyway, don’t even know why I brought it up.”

“I’m not really royalty, Parakarry.” Luigi crossed his arms, a faint blush on his face as he turned, exhaling. “I’m just the prince consort.”

“Sureee… whatever you say.” Parakarry shrugged. “Just don’t come crying to me if you ever get kidnapped by Bowser or anything. If his knack for capturing royalty keeps up, that is.”

Luigi chuckled. “Then you’ll have to team up with Mario again to rescue me, I suppose.”

“I guess so.” Parakarry flapped his wings, turning away from Luigi with a hearty laugh. “I really should be on my way, though, friend. I still have so many letters to deliver, and there are so many impatient homeowners out there. A postman’s job is never done, after all!”

“I understand.” Luigi stepped back, smiling. “Be safe out there.”

“Of course!”

And with that, Parakarry flew off. Luigi waved goodbye to him, watching the postman until he disappeared from view into the cloudy sky in the distance.

Luigi stretched before pushing open the fence's wooden gate, retrieving his mail and sifting through it. He yawned, trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes as the sun continued to creep up over the hillside.

The mail mostly consisted of bills and scam letters from Waluigi, but a postcard from Mario made him smile, a warm feeling now in his chest. It was nice to think that his brother still had time to send him things, despite how busy he must be, traveling the world with his newfound cap companion and whatnot.

Luigi walked back into his manor groggily, dropping off the mail on the kitchen counter before walking to the bathroom to freshen up.

His pet, Polterpup, followed him curiously, leaping up against his owner’s legs to try and get his attention. Luigi smiled, laughing and promising the ghostly pup playtime later. He still had something to do today, after all.

Luigi did just enough to appear suitable before heading back out the door, walking down the path towards Toad Town. He had been up since early morning only because he wanted to get to Tayce T.’s kitchen before it got too crowded, and morning was his best bet. He didn’t exactly like being out alone at night, and Grambi forbid some poor soul try to go to the bakery in the afternoon. Luigi cringed at the thought.

All he needed was to pick up some ingredients for a few recipes he'd gotten as gifts from Peach for his birthday. While he was relatively good at cooking, he didn’t know a whole lot about making pastries. That was the princess’s specialty, not his. Luigi usually stuck to making various spaghetti dishes. But, most of the recipes given to him were for cakes, muffins, cupcakes, and the like, so he’d have to get a few ingredients from Tayce T. if he hoped on ever finishing even one of the recipes.

Not that he minded waking up early anyway. Early morning walks were always so beautiful. The creatures were starting to stir, and the sun was just starting to rise. He breathed slowly, taking in all the sights until he made his way into Toad Town.

Toads were congregating outside, walking in and out of stores and talking amongst themselves. Luigi’s presence didn’t faze them, not like if Mario was there. But, Luigi was fine with that. He didn’t like being randomly talked to and swarmed anyway. The toads still waved and said hello as he passed though, Luigi politely greeting them in return.

He eventually made it into Tayce T.’s kitchen, the little cook glancing up at Luigi as he entered. A faint smile graced her face as he walked in. She was already moving to reach into a cupboard to retrieve his items before he could even request anything of her.

”Ah, Luigi, welcome in! I’ve been preparing what you ordered. Just allow me to clarify…” She hummed, putting a bag out on the counter. “You just wanted the cake mix and a honey shroom, right?”

Luigi nodded, handing over the sufficient amount of coins for her as he smiled. “Grazie.”

She took the payment hesitantly, exhaling. “It's always so nice to see such a happy face, Luigi. I take it your morning has been lovely?”

”Yep! Actually, I was planning on making something sweet tonight for my hus-” Luigi paused upon noticing Tayce T.’s sunken features. Her gaze wasn’t focused on Luigi, instead staring forward with dull eyes. She looked… sad. “A-Are you alright, Ms. Tayce?”

”W-What? Oh, yes. My apologies!” Tayce T. flinched and held her hands together, nodding. “I’ve just been thinking about… oh, there was this incident this morning and… I don’t know. I'm sure it'll be alright. I'm fine." She offered a weak smile.

Luigi ventured further. “You’re… sure?”

”Most certainly, Luigi.”

"Do you want to talk-"

”Hey!” Another toad’s voice cut in, Luigi flipping around to make eye contact with a very agitated customer, who was tapping their foot impatiently on the floor. “Some of us also want to buy stuff!”

”O-Oh, I’m sorry, I-”

Tayce T. reached at Luigi’s hand, handing him his bag of ingredients. She smiled. ”Take care, Luigi. I trust I’ll see you again soon?”

"Oh, y-yeah!” Luigi attempted before being curtly shoved aside by the other toad.

Tayce T. looked at the customer disapprovingly before softening her expression, Luigi looking back at her. She glanced away before waving goodbye as Luigi made his way out the door.

Luigi sighed, cradling the bag of ingredients in his arms as he started back toward home. The walk back was peaceful, the young brunette catching small bits of conversation as the toads spoke to one another, talking about the day ahead.

”-and you haven’t seen him at all?”

The fragments of a conversation caught his attention.

He turned a corner, noticing a bright pink figure with her back turned to him, talking to a green-capped, mustached toad with glasses on his face. He was looking over a piece of paper, rubbing at his chin.

”...Nope. Can’t say I have. I wish you the best of luck in finding ‘im though.”

The pink figure stared down at the ground defeatedly as the green toad walked away, only perking her head up when she heard her name called.

”Toadette!”

”Luigi…?”

Luigi approached with a smile on his face, but froze, his breath hitching as Toadette turned to face him. Her expression was pale and positively mortified, clutching staggering amounts of paper in her arms like a vice.

”Toadette, a-are you okay?”

”Have you seen Toad?!”

The question caught him off guard.

”N-No… I haven’t. What’s wrong?”

Toadette wiped at the tears forming in her eyes, whimpering as she tried to compose herself. "T-Toad… Toad, he… I don’t know where he is, Luigi!”

Luigi felt his chest stiffen. “What?”

”A-About a week ago, I went out of the house to go hang out with Birdetta, and I left Toad home alone. When I got back later that night, he wasn’t there. And I-I don’t know where he would’ve gone, because I was only out for a few hours and-d he didn’t tell me he was going anywhere, and he would’ve told me if he did, and he didn’t leave a note or an-anything a-and I-!”

”Hey, hey…” Luigi, despite his own growing anxiety, tried to comfort Toadette. “Slow down.”

”I tried to j-just wait it out to see if he’d come home, but he still isn’t back! I wanted to take matters into my own hands, because I don’t know if h-he ran away, or if he got lost, or worse, but I-I couldn’t stand to just sit there while my brother was still missing, so I-I made these...”

She paused, sniffling and reaching towards the bundle of papers in her arms. She handed one over to Luigi, Luigi’s face noticeably paling as he examined the page.

It was a missing poster, the words alarmingly bolded with a photograph of Toad plastered on it, information lining the bottom.

”I tried getting these hung up all over town, the post office, the club, the boardwalk, the kitchen… b-but… no one has seen h-him so far, and I-I…” Toadette released a sob, nearly falling into Luigi’s arms.

”Toadette…” Luigi tried to reach a hand out to comfort her, but she shrunk back.

“I-I guess I’m probably just o-overreacting… he… he’s old enough to do what he wants… I-I just,” she hiccuped between sobs. “I wish he would’ve told me where he was going! I-I just want him to be okay. B-But, if he doesn’t want to be f-found, then…” She shook her head. ”If he doesn’t turn up s-soon, I’m going to go out and find him myself…! I-I have to know if my brother is okay!”

”Th-That sounds dangerous.” Luigi squeaked out. “I-I can look with you, and I’m sure Peasley wouldn’t object to joining us… You shouldn’t go alone.”

”Hopefully it won’t come to that.” Toadette concluded with a sigh, turning away as she rubbed at her eyes. “Just… keep an eye out for him, please. If you hear from him, let me know.”

”R-Right. Of course.”

Luigi didn’t have time to say anything else before Toadette promptly rushed off, approaching another couple of toads, handing them each the posters. Luigi turned to continue back home, despite now feeling a heavy sensation swelling deep within his chest.

An ominous feeling of dread loomed over him as he walked back to the manor.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Luigi’s walk back was mostly silent, aside from the occasional heavy sigh or nervous hum.

The thoughts of worry produced by the single haunting image of one of his friends on a missing poster made his stomach twist. He tried to steady his breathing and think rationally as he approached his house, sighing. As he passed the fence gate outside the manor and approached the door up the stone path, however, he paused.

There was an envelope placed on the doorknob, delicately balanced atop it.

Confused, he shifted his holding on the bag of ingredients and picked up the note, flipping it over to see if there was any information on it. All that was printed on the envelope was a picture of a star, colored in a violet ink.

Perhaps Parakarry had left one of his letters in the post office after all.

He pushed open the door, putting the cake mix and honey shroom away before carefully tearing open the mysterious envelope. With cautious fingers, he removed a sheet of paper from within and began to read what was neatly printed upon it.

‘Hello, Luigi.

It’s been awhile, hasn’t it? Far too long, I’d say. How long has it been? It was quite hard to keep track of time down there, I’m afraid.

I’ve been really busy, you see. It’s taken me ever so long to send you this letter.

They tried their hardest, their very hardest, to contain me. And I admire their amusing attempts. But, I’m quite the persistent person, like a spider weaving its web over and over on a rainy day.

To think, life works in mysterious ways. It’s quite funny, really, how our pasts catch up to us.

You and I have plenty in common. You may hate to admit it, but it’s true. You and I are much closer than you’d like to think. Haven’t you felt lonesome without me? I’m apart of you, after all.

May I indulge you in a secret?

You ruined me, Luigi.

Your weakness brought about my downfall. It led me to a horrific afterlife of endless torment. I endured so much suffering. Loneliness and eternal solitude consumed my days.

But, now, I’ve escaped from that treacherous prison known as death. And, as I had plenty of time to ponder, I know exactly what I want now.

I want to see you suffer, just as I had.

I’m going to make your life a living nightmare. All who you know and love, will be guaranteed a long and painful demise at my hands.

You ruined my chance at happiness and I’m only returning the favor.

I want nothing more than to see you break as you are forced to watch your life crumble apart.

I’ve spent so much time preparing for this, you see.

I shan’t spoil the surprise. Not yet. Nor will I reveal my identity. I want you to experience every moment of this spectacle for yourself.

It will be quite a show.

I’ll see you again soon, Luigi. I’m much closer than you’d like to think.

~ ✦ ~’

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everyday-effing-therapy · 5 years ago

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21/07/2020

Hello,

Again, it’s been quite a long time since I last posted. I’ve been keeping myself busy, trying to get things done when it comes to me moving to a different country, which is probably going to happen in about five weeks.

I am incredibly pumped, so thankful for the opportunity and just overall happy, but I know that it’s going to be one hell of a stressful experience. I will be on my own, not just in a way of living alone, but generally I don’t know anyone who lives there.

Now, I can be incredibly sociable and outgoing, but I need to meet some people first and I usually have a bit of a problem with reaching out. That’s why I do hope that I’m going to come across some people that will reach out to me first and then, based on that positive experience, I hope to be able to make some friends on my own.

I try not to be too stressed out as I did the same thing when I was going to junior high. I knew absolutely nobody from my class, I was terrified and yet, I managed to make lots of friends on my first day, exactly because I felt I needed to make some.

When I went to high school, I attended with a lot of friends from junior high and ended up not really making any new friendships in the first couple of days, cause I just didn’t feel the need to.

All in all, I’m trying to remain positive. Lots of things are not in my power and I’m just waiting and hoping that everything will go smoothly.

When it comes to my life here, tomorrow I am travelling for a little picnic with my friend. Said friend is a really interesting girl, that was much closer to me at some point, especially around a year and a half ago, there was a time when we kissed and very recently, some things happened that might indicate some interest.

I am describing it in a very clinical way, because that’s just how I deal with things when I am not totally sure how I should be handling them.

And, I guess, a lot of things in life are the ones you don’t know how to handle correctly.

I was thinking about my relationship with that girl a couple of nights ago in bed. It’s been one of those nights when you are overly emotional, can’t go to sleep for shit and just spend hours thinking. I thought about her, about how I feel about her, about the fact that despite liking her and even wanting something more in terms of body, I don’t have a crush on her and how that’s so weird, because I never feel things like that. Like, it’s always a crush at first and then comes the sexuality. Here, it’s different. And I guess I like it, it’s just that I really don’t know what to do with it, how to behave, when to let my guard down and when not. It’s precisely the reason why I don’t do open relationships or any “friends-with-benefits” sort of situations.

Still, I hope that tomorrow will be fun. We are probably going to spend a couple of hours together, not more than 7 though, cause I need to be home by 7 pm to eat supper with my parents, as we do everyday. It’s a family bonding exercise, in a way, we get to talk about the things that were cool, interesting or bothered us during the day. Also, if there is anything we need to discuss, it’s also happening then.

I have a new computer and setting up all of that was problematic. I’ve never had a one like that before, but I needed to change my old one, because it didn’t meet the requirements for my university lectures.

When it comes to that, I don’t hate the new one, it’s alright, but I preferred the old one more. Still, I can’t do anything about it, so there’s that.

My dad’s been crazy about selling stuff too. Because we either don’t need something or need to get something new, he got to sell lots of things. I guess it’s making him happy, cause it’s always satisfying that you can give things a new life, or at least another one. It’s a very good way of getting some cashback as well.

Still, I think that out of all the things that he was supposed to sell, he managed to sell the vast majority of the products, so it’s all right.

All of that is giving me a major headache, all the stress is building up in my body and I can’t do much to relieve it. I exercise every single day, try to eat healthier, lots of fruits and vegetables and I cut down on all the fizzy drinks and whatnot. I do yoga, take afternoon naps, drink herbs that are healthy for you, take vitamins, read books, listen to music, watch Naruto - I am slowly but surely reaching the end of the main plot and it’s been amazing, but somehow, I can’t escape the stress of the unknown.

Only hope can save us and I do hope we will remain hopeful and grateful. Even if things don’t necessarily go according to the plan, I still do believe that everything happens for a reason and it will be okay. We will all be okay.

The sad thing is that my therapist hadn’t reached out to me and, since I finished high school, I feel like I got removed from the system, so until I move abroad, I will not have a therapist. There, I will be able to attend counseling for free, which is super nice, but still - a new therapist in a new country will be another stressful experience.

Su had her birthday today and I wrote her some birthday wishes. My birthday is soon as well, but both Su and V will be out of the country, so I guess I’ll need to find somebody else to spend it with, apart from my parents, of course. I might just ask the girl I’m seeing tomorrow and who knows, maybe something cool will come out of it.

I have to admit, writing posts on this new laptop is way more comfortable and pleasant, because the keyboard has such nice clicks, I feel satisfied <3

I wish you all as much satisfaction and happiness as it is possible.

Sweet dreams.

Love,

#23:54 #21/07 #night post #still 11 pm #journal #journal entry #diary #life #c posts #friends #tv shows #c is so frickin' lost #girls girls girls #my bisexuality is quaking

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oldxsoulsx · 6 years ago

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Always Yours - Kryoz OneShot

oooof. Sorry this was so long guys! It took maybe an hour for me to write, but it felt like 10. I’m at work now, which is where I write most of the time (my client goes to bed at like 7:30, I gotta stay up until midnight so what else should I do lol)

But here ya go. A super long, super fluffy, probably not as good as I think it is Kryoz OneShot!

When you saw him, you knew you were fucked.

Disheveled bleached hair, with brown roots growing out. Rings on almost all 10 fingers, nails painted different colors. Vape in his right hand, phone in his left.

Is this the person that Jaren had wanted you to meet?

You sighed, making your way over to the stranger, and your best friend of 10 years. When Jaren saw you, a smile stretched on his face.

“(Y/N)!” he called, jumping up when you reached the two to give you a hug. You smiled softly, the comfort of your best friends arms giving you courage. “I’d like you to meet my friend, John. He’s in Canada for a week or two, we have to catch up on making videos together.”

You smiled at the other boy, raising a hand in a somewhat half wave. He stood up, stretching his arms out.

“Come on, (Y/N), any friend of Jarens is a friend of mine,” he says, pulling you into a hug. Your face flushed a bright red, and the smell of his cologne captured your senses.

“Best friend actually. Ten years and counting. Don’t de-rank me,” you say, pulling away. The confidence that came out of your mouth shocked you, but John just laughed.

“Damn, Smitt. She’s feisty. Where have you been keeping her all these years?!”

“For the time that I’ve known you? The guest room of my house. You’re sleeping on the couch this time, bud,” Jaren said, patting Johns back. John pretended to wipe a tear away from his cheek, and you giggled.

“I couldn’t let you sleep on the couch. That shit sucks. I’ll move some of my stuff out and into Jaren’s room for the time being, no biggie,” You say, and Jaren scoffs. You knew he was about to complain, but you shot him a look that quieted him down in a second.

“I can cut the tension with a knife,” John laughs nervously. “You two like… a thing?”

“No!” you say quickly. Everyone thought you two were dating, or at least on the road to dating. You were sick of it, Jaren was more of a family to you than your actual family. And you couldn’t ever imagine dating him. No bueno.

“Ouch, (Y/N). Way to hurt my feelings,” Jaren said , and you sighed.

“So, now that I’ve walked my happy butt to you guys, what’re you planning for the day?” You asked, changing the subject. John laughed, taking a hit of his vape. You reach your hand out, asking for a hit “I promise I don’t have any type of disease. Just the itch for nicotine is killing me and I don’t have any more Juul pods left,” you explain.

John hands you his vape, impressed with the cloud you blew out afterwards.

“I was thinking grab some food, and then just take a walk. You two can get to know each other and whatnot,” Jaren explains, and you nod, handing the vape back to John. He probably didn’t feel it, but when your fingers brushed against his, it was almost like electricity shot through your arm.

“Yeah sure… let’s go,” you say awkwardly, clearing your throat and walking ahead of the boys. You already knew exactly where you were going. When Jaren invites one of his gaming friends to visit, he always wanted to go to his favorite restaurant. You absolutely hate it, and you think that half of the reason he invites his friends is because it gives him an excuse to go. You never go with him anymore, other than his birthday.

“Please tell me we’re not going back to that crappy place you took me last time. I mean, come on. The shrimp wasn’t even cooked the whole way through!” You heat from behind you, and you slow your pace a bit to hear the conversation.

“I told you not to get the shrimp. That’s (Y/N)’s favorite meal and every time she orders, she expects a different outcome. It’s always the same. Jesus, you two should just get married already, same taste in food and shit,” Jaren huffs, but then mumbles under his breath about going to your favorite restaurant. You smile, walking towards him and linking your arm with his.

“Thanks, J,” you say, and he nods.

Once the little restaurant was in view, you three made your way inside. The warmth of the kitchen seeped into the dining area, delicious smells circling throughout the building. You felt at peace.

The waitress seated you, handing you guys your menus. You sat alone, John and Jaren opposite you. Giving your drink orders to the waitress, you scanned the menu. You already knew what you were going to get, so this was just to see what new items were added since the last time you came. You looked up, seeing the boys whispering to each other and laughing, probably making obscene and rude jokes and comments. You smile a bit, glad that today turned out much better than expected.

_______________

“I’m hungry,” John whined, and you rolled your eyes.

“We just ate two hours ago?” You said, and he nodded.

“Yeah, but I’m American. We eat all the time.” He jokes, and you smile. “Ice cream?” he asks, pointing at the store front next to you. You nod, making your way into the shop.

“Jaren’s going to be so pissed, this is his all time favorite ice cream place,” you said, giving your order to the teen behind the counter.

“Yeah, well he’s probably getting some good good right now, if ya know what I mean,” John winked, nudging you. You suppressed a laugh, knowing that that assumption was probably true. After lunch, Jaren had checked his phone and told you two that his girlfriend had an emergency and he had to go help. His face was beat red.

“Make it two, please,” John said to the teen, and passed him some cash.

“I can pay for my own ice cream, John,” you argue, and he nods

“Yeah, but now we can count this as our first official date,” he says, handing the freshly made cone to you.

Your eyes widen, and you don’t even know what to reply, so instead you start licking the ice cream, trying to avoid confrontation.

“I mean… that was very forward of me. I’m sorry. I just think you’re absolutely gorgeous and I want to get to know you better,” John said, face tinged pink. You sit down at one of the two tables in the shop, looking at him.

The last time one of Jaren’s friends liked you, it ended bad. Like, Jaren beating the shit out of him bad. You bit your lip, knowing that you want to get to know John more as well. You were nervous, knowing that John and Jaren had this amazing friendship, you didn’t want to be the one to ruin it or get in the way of anything.

You sigh, looking at the table. “I want to get to know you better as well, John,” you say, placing your hand on top of his, “But do you think that’s a good idea? I mean, we live in complete different countries. And if something does happen between you and I, I don’t want Jaren in the middle of it. He can be…. very overprotective,”

“Yeah, I know. The first time he ever posted a picture of you two on Instagram, I immediately got jealous. Of him. I thought you two were in a relationship. When I asked him about it, he basically laughed in my face. Then gave me the rundown about how if I were to show you any interest, and if I were to hurt you, he’d kill me,” he chuckled “I wish I was joking but the tone he had made me realize he was serious. That was three years ago, (Y/N). I’ve been begging him for your number since. He never would give it to me, deciding that if I wanted it, I’d have to get it from you myself. That’s when I booked the first flight here,” he explained, face still pink.

“But I was visiting my parents in Washington,” You mumbled, smiling softly. He nodded.

“We were probably in the airport at the same damn time, and we had no idea. After that trip, I was broke. As soon as I had enough money for a flight, I had to come back. That sounds creepy now that I say it out loud,” he laughs, a bit nervous. You giggle, nodding.

“Creepy, indeed,” You say, but grab his hand, intertwining your fingers. “But hey, cheers to our first date,” you say, both of you soon becoming a blushing mess.

_________________

Three Years Later

“I’m so happy you’re here,” John said, wrapping his arms around you from behind. It took maybe 3 months after your first date for John to officially ask you to be his girlfriend. He had flown back to Washington, and you two had talked non stop. He bought a plane ticket for you, after weeks of consistent begging.

When you had shown up at his apartment, Kugo had opened the door, looking at you quizzically. Before he had a chance to ask, John had moved him out of the way, wrapping you in a hug and placing a passionate kiss to your mouth. You heard Jay and Kugo in the back, wolf-whistling and clapping.

The first year flew by in a blur. At least once a month, one of you were on a plane flying to see the other. It totally fucked up your sleeping schedule, and you had to quit your job because you weren’t able to continue to keep taking time off. Jaren helped you start a YouTube channel, letting you borrow his gaming setup until you could afford your own.

Year two, John had asked you to come visit him for longer. He just moved into an apartment by himself, and would get lonely most of the time. You’d stay for a month at least, two tops. It was getting harder for you to afford rent in Canada, while continuing to buy plane tickets to and from your apartment. Jaren’s girlfriend, Chloe, had eventually moved in. You loved her, and were happy for them, but every time you were home, you felt an empty hole in your heart as you heard them giggling about something or other. It wasn’t fair, your person was all the way in another country, on the other side of it nonetheless.

You had ended up venting to John about it, and two days later he showed up at your door, on one knee, asking you to marry him.

Of course you said yes, how could you not? You finally had a ring on your ring finger, and that was the only one John had kept void of any jewelry. It was like you two were puzzle pieces, fitting together. At the end of his trip, he brought up the thought of you moving in with him.

It scared you. Of course you thought about moving in with him. But for some reason, it seemed so soon. Even after the continuous months you’ve spent with each other.

But you agreed anyways, and as soon as he left you began packing. Jaren was in on John’s idea of you two living together, so it didn’t surprise him when you had asked to talk to him about it. You were nervous, afraid that your best friend would be mad you were leaving. He was ecstatic. He knew that as soon as you two had laid eyes on each other, the ship had sailed.

The moving process took a good couple months. Getting your Visa, switching your address, and mailing the items to John’s house was a lot. But once you had settled in, and made sure everything was arranged just how you liked it (especially in your office), you were content.

That first night, John and you had laid on the couch, lounging in sweats while you cuddled close. He was playing with the ring on your finger, kissing your temple every few minutes.

“I am the luckiest guy in the world, (Y/N),” John said, breaking the silence. You smiled, kissing his cheek softly. “I can’t wait to marry you, for you to be mine forever. To have little kiddos running around, God I hope they have your nose.”

You got teary, and pulled his face to yours, kissing him full of passion and love. That didn’t stop, it followed you two into your shared bedroom, where the love turned to lust.

Both sweaty, cuddled up next to each other, you kissed his shoulder softly.

“I’m all yours, John. I always was, and always will be.”

#kryoz #kryozgaming #smii7y #gbg #gay baby gang #misfits #the misfits podcast #zuckles #swaggersouls #goodguyfitz #tobyonthetele #mccreamy #inotorious

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trashinaglass-archive · 6 years ago

Text

Twinsies

Y/n and Charlotte share the same birthday

Request: Hi! I just realized Charlotte (Harrison’ sister) and I have the same birthday! Maybe you could write something about? thanks ❤️

A/n: This was hell trying to write. But we got it done. I feel so accomplished.

“Hey, girl!” You said as you answered the phone. You were currently in your car driving home from the grocery store.

“Hey!” Charlotte said. She was the sister of your boyfriend, Harrison, who you had been dating for four years now. You two were super close, even to the point where you shared the same birthday.

“I was thinking about what I wanted to do this year for my birthday, and I thought, since we share the same birthday, we should have a party for both of us?” she suggested.

“That’s actually a great idea, why haven’t we done that already?” You asked her. In the past years, you both had to schedule around each other so you were able to attend the others but also have something for yourself. Doing a joint party was genius idea.

“I don’t know, it would’ve saved so much time and stress.”

“Tell me about it,” you told her with a laugh.

“Well, I was looking at some stuff- themes and decorations and whatnot. I’ll send what I liked to you right now,” Charlotte informed you.

“Sounds good, I’ll let you know what I think when I get home,” you told her before saying your goodbyes and ending the call. You pulled into your driveway a short while later, grabbing your groceries and heading into the house to see Harrison sat on your couch.

“Do you ever see the inside of your own place?” You asked him jokingly. He jumped up hearing your voice and stood up from the couch, following you into the kitchen.

“What’s that suppose to mean?” He asked you as he began to help you put the groceries away.

“You’re here when I wake up, you’re here when I fall asleep, you’re here when I go to work. You’re here now,” you began to list off for him with a teasing smile on your face. You didn’t mind him being around- you just thought it was funny just how much time he spent at your place.

“Well if you’d like me to be around less,” Harrison started to say.

“No, it’s not a bad thing,” you told him. You wrapped your arms around him as you looked up to him. “I just feel bad you have to pay rent for a place you don’t even see half the time.”

“Maybe we could move in together and fix that little problem,” he suggested, his hands rubbing up and down your arms.

“Maybe we could,” you said as you bit your lip, Harrison bending down to kiss you. “Charlotte called earlier and suggested we have a joint birthday party.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’m excited. It’ll be really fun,” you told him. “Speaking of, I told her I’d look at some of the ideas she had for it.” You released Harrison from your grip and walked toward your phone, looking at the messages from Charlotte.

One of the ideas she had was to rent out the patio of a nice restaurant in London for a dinner party. You liked that one the most- it was simple and personal but still fun. You text Charlotte back immediately telling her you liked that one. You began to talk about different decorations and ideas you had for the night.

. . .

A few weeks later and it was the night of your and Charlotte’s dinner party. Like you had discussed, you rented out the patio and invited your family and closest friends to celebrate with you. You enjoyed a delicious dinner before you and Charlotte were ushered to the head of the table.

The waiters came out holding a cake for each you. Everyone sang happy birthday and you each blew out your candles. You quickly posed together for a picture with your cakes before your moms began to cut them, handing pieces to your guests.

You were sat in your seat, looking down at your phone as you edited the photo of you and Charlotte, posting it to Instagram.

“(Your age) and 16 never looked so hot”

You were reading the comments as they rolled in, Harrison pressing his mouth to your temple as he walked up behind you.

“Happy birthday, gorgeous,” he whispered in your ear. You looked up at him as he moved to sit in the chair beside you.

“I bet you say that to all the birthday girls today,” you joked as you watched him eat his piece of cake.

“All two of you,” He joked back.

“I still can’t get over how crazy it is that we have the same birthday.”

“Works out great for me- I won’t be forgetting either of your birthdays ever again.”

“Harrison,” you said with a light laugh as you softly smacked his thigh, causing him to laugh at you.

“I’m just kidding. I think it’s really cool you two have the same birthday. Like you were destined to be best friends- you do act a lot alike.”

“Yeah, I’m glad if I had to have a twin, it was someone like her and not a total weirdo.”

So if my math’s correct, Charlotte is 16?? I could’ve sworn I thought I saw Harrison post saying they were a few months apart, but turns out he actually said they’re seven years apart. I wish I looked as hot as she does when I was 16.

#harrison osterfield one shot #harrison osterfield blurb #harrison osterfield x reader #harrison osterfeild imagine #harrison osterfield

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youknowmymethods · 6 years ago

Text

Content Creator Interview #2

In this week’s interview, fandom friends @lilsherlockian1975 and @mrsmcrieff talk about whether they found Sherlock hot or not at first sight, how publicly sharing their work changed their writing, and the hardest thing about writing smutfic (pun fully intended).

And for those who don’t know, today is Lillian’s Birthday, so m’dear, Many Happy Returns!!!!

Hey, so Lilsherlockian1975 and myself, MrsMCrieff, have decided to interview each other for Aine’s challenge. We’re going to try to answer each other’s questions but there is always the danger of us going massively off piste. Our conversations in the past have been eclectic and very wide-ranging not to mention M rated.

Anyway, I thought we could start by saying how we came into the fandom and more than that writing in the fandom. Lil, do you want to start?

Lil: All right, my sister on another continent, here’s how it went: As I’ve explained about finding The Full House on Pinterest, let’s explore what came before that moment, then just after... I was working third shift at a hotel (I had to as Mr Lil and I didn’t really have any childcare options at the time, so we just worked opposite shifts). The hotel was in a very small town - we were never busy, some nights we sold maybe 2 rooms - I usually spent my time watching Netflix. After making my way through Doctor Who, Star Trek Next Gen, Voyager then (God help me) DS9, Farscape and Firefly, I’d finally run out of anything to watch. You’d be surprised how quickly you can burn through a series binge watching for 8 hours at a time (and getting paid for it!).

Then… then I found Sherlock. Well, that changed things… a bit.

“Good Lord, who is the Cumberstud chap and why won’t he have all the sex with me!?” was my first thought, my second was, “Maybe I have a chance with the dishy DI?” and third? “Oh… what fresh hell is this ‘Mycroft’? Yummy!” Then finally, “Ahh, did the casting director somehow read my diary? Creepy but… all right.” To my defense, it was late and I usually worked on very little sleep. Also, I’m a kinky bitch.

I’d never been involved in a ‘fandom proper’, I suppose. That’s not to say that I wasn’t a fangirl. I am and always have been. I was hugely into the Kevin Smith movies, going as far as visiting the Quick Stop and RST Video in Lenardo, NJ, respectively, as well as The Secret Stash, in Red Bank. I was a comic book geek in my youth, Marvel mostly, but some DC as well.

After reading The Full House, I desperately needed MORE Sherlock and luckily enough, there was more to be found.

At first I was just reading, then I wrote and posted a couple of (horrible) fics and met this fellow writer named MrsMCrieff (I might have had a little ‘writing crush’ on you, Mrs!). We chatted on FF.net and struck up a friendship.

So, for me, writing came before fandom. Mrs was doing some betaing for me, but I didn’t ask for help often; I hated bothering her all the time for the multitude of stories I was turning out. At some point around here, I got an elusive invite to AO3 from sherlockian87, bless her soul, because I kept trying to join and couldn’t get a blessed invitation. Also around this time, I had written a prompt and got a PM from MizJoely asking if she could fix some of my mistakes (she was very sweet about it, even though I totally flipped - half fangirling, half losing my shit because ‘Crap, I screwed up so bad, here was The MizJoely asking if she could edit out my mistakes!’) but she wasn’t being critical at all, of course, just helpful as I soon found out. Shortly after, now having formed a friendship with MIz, she suggested that I start a Tumblr blog. And that’s how it all started.

Yes, sorry… I, um, tend to be a tad loquacious. Writing out my answers doesn’t help one little bit.

Okay, Mrs, right back atcha!

Mrs: OK, shall I try to be more concise? I’ll probably fail as I’m terrible as writing short fics they always seem to end up spread over multiple chapters.

I’m another one who had always been a fangirl, Doctor Who, Buffy, Twilight, vampire Diaries (yeah, I love my vampires) but I’d also been a Sherlock Holmes fan. I’d read all the books in my teens, watched the Basil Rathbone and Jeremy Brett adaptations and even stayed at the Sherlock Holmes hotel on Baker St so when a new series was advertised it was an easy sale.

I was late to the cumberobsession though. I have to admit watching the first two series as they came out and I remember thinking I like them but it’s a shame Sherlock isn’t that hot. I know, I know, I’m embarrassed even as I write that.

It all changed after watching season 3 and I blame the Sherlolly kiss 100%. I watched the series, DELETED the records!! And then realised I was spending a lot of time thinking about Sherlock and Benedict...that turned into looking him up online and from there it was a short step to reading Sherlolly fics on fanfic (I was already reading fics for other shipping obsessions). Anyway, it didn’t take long before Sherlolly took over all my other ships and Benedict was my number one hottie.

As for writing, I hadn’t written anything fiction based since school and school was a long time ago...almost thirty years. But one day I was looking for a specific fic, I wanted to read about Sherlock and Molly having to share body heat and I just couldn’t find anything that satisfied me. I’m not sure why but in that moment I decided to write it myself and in half an hour I’d written Frozen...my first ever fic. It took another couple of hours to pluck up the courage to post it and I clearly remember feeling a bit sick and my hand shaking as I pressed the final button to post.

Thankfully, I almost immediately started to receive positive reviews and feedback and it wasn’t long before I started to write more...the rest as they say is history. Lil got in touch soon after and it was fun chatting to another writer just starting out. We soon found we were not dissimilar in age and both had two sons and the friendship started there.

We’ve been through quite a lot over the last few years Lil and written some fab stories. Wouldn’t you agree?

(I should let on that we are now faffing about trying to find the original list of questions...we are trying to be professional).

Ok Lil, so I’ve looked at Aine’s questions and they look really hard. Any preferences on which ones you want to answer :).

Lil: I think a great follow up to that first one is this: How did posting your first story change your process of writing? So I’m shooting it back to you, Mrs, and you can send me that one or select a new one for me. Tag, you’re it!

Mrs: I can tell you quite simply how it changed my process of writing...given that it was my first piece of writing in 30 years I was starting from scratch when it came to any process. One thing that I started with that’s held true for me ever since is that my stories are fully mapped out and written before I even start posting the first chapter. I will edit and make refinements but the bones of the story are there.

I know lots of people post a chapter and then write the next chapter but that would put me under too much pressure. The downside is that if someone gives me a prompt they could be waiting months before they see it posted. The upside is if I’ve started posting a fic you will get the end of it as it’s already been written.

There have only been two exceptions to this method: Sherlock Holmes, Vampire which I worked on over a year or so posting four chapters every so often as I wrote them...it was stressful. And the other is Never Have I Ever which was/is more of a collection of one shots woven together into a fic.

How about you Lil? How did it change for you?

Lil: So, I’d been writing little stories and whatnot for years and years but, having no idea that there was such a thing as ff.net or AO3, I had no place to put them. Writing was always a very, very distant dream of mine. I have loads of notebooks filled with stories, story ideas and my own personal ramblings (unfortunately, my Tumblr followers now have to read the ‘ramblings business’). I stopped for many years after my roommate/best friend since childhood found some of my writing in college that I’d carefully hidden under my bed. I came home to find her in my room, sat on the floor, on the phone with our Art History professor (whom she was sleeping with), as she read him my story and laughed hysterically at its awfulness.

I was devastated and vowed never to write again.

But that changed, of course. Those first maybe ten stories were just me letting my mind go and getting out what I wanted to say (aided by liberal amounts of wine). Since then, however, my ‘process’ has changed drastically. I don’t always write an outline (never for one shots, which I write often) but I generally do for long fics. If not, it’s easy for me to get lost and miss critical points. My writing has become more about ‘layering’ for lack of a better word.

I found after those first few posted fics, that in going back and re-reading them I wanted to make changes. I didn’t re-edit them (because I’m lazy), but it made me realize that my writing required more time and proofing before posting; that first draft is just the start for me - a thin layer of primer paint on a canvas, if you will. I then read over it and add more details and more and more until I get the desired effect. Again, much like oil painting, I have to build things up, layer by layer. This works for me; I have no idea if it’s a proper method of writing. So, posting my first fic(s) helped me learn that I shouldn’t be so trigger happy about posting if the story wasn’t ready.

Okay, Mrs, this one is geared specifically towards you. I don’t think anyone would argue with me about your supernatural ability to write ‘case fics’, so let me ask: Which do you prefer writing, case fics or fluffy smut-filled romps? And why?

Mrs: Oh God, ask me something easy why don’t you. Both, I like writing both. I love the depth of a case fic, the idea, the research, plotting it out and working out the characters and detail but it’s so time consuming and I often write a bit, leave it, come back to it etc. etc. so a detailed case fic can take six months.

Fluff on the other hand is less satisfying but quicker (my minds already in the gutter with an analogy).

Woohoo I kept is fairly short for once. So, here’s one that’s good for you. I’m endlessly envious of how easily you make friends and how you know so many people in the fandom whereas I’m the introverted hermit. Which other authors are you friends with, and how have they help you become a better writer?

Lil: Goodness! You make me sound like a social butterfly (Mr Lil calls me that all the time!). I like people, plain and simple. Other than you, I am close to MizJoely and Darnedchild, that’s no secret, so I’ll talk about them first (you included, because you’ve made me a better writer, I’m sure of it - have actual proof!)

I cannot count the ways Miz has helped me improve my writing. She figuratively took me by the ear and said “okay, you don’t suck but do you even know what a comma is used for?” No, not those actual words, she was much kinder about it, but I got the hidden meaning and I needed it, trust me. She also challenges me and is not afraid to be honest with me when I’ve written something that isn’t good or perhaps doesn’t fit. I know I’ve improved since she started betaing for me, like a 1000%. And Child… When I volunteered to beta for the Big Bang Challenge, I had no idea what I was getting into, but man… she’d written and enormous fic. Good, amazing really, but it was longer than anything I’d ever worked on before. It scared the shit out of me but I really think it was exactly what I needed. Betaing someone else’s work can really make you see your own mistakes from a new perspective. I feel like I jumped ahead after working on the BBC with Child. As for you, MrsMCrieff, just the other day I had The Best compliment… someone actually thought I was British! Yes, that happened. I can only attribute that little feat to you, my friend. You’ve taught me when to add a ‘u’, when not to zed and about many different terms like pavement, taps, hob, loo, trousers (we really don’t say that here!). Not to mention the fact that most European men aren’t circumcised. Who knew?! It’s pretty common in the US.

But that’s just a few. I cannot count the number of fandom friends who have helped me and all the ways that they’ve done so. That doesn’t mean I won’t try…

There’s likingthistoomuch who always listens to my ideas and encouraged me to post my first Harry Potter fic. OhAine has been a true friend from the very beginning, always insightful and supportive. Mellovesall who is just too sweet for words and always helps with edits, no matter what’s going on in her life. Kendrapendragon who let me bounce ideas for my Mirror Has Two Faces AU off of her for like a whole day! the-sapphiresky who has helped me with this historical AU that may or may not ever see the light of day. Allthebellsinvenice who answered about a dozen questions (over two years!) for Dig Down Deep when I’d panic about some D/s situation I’d written myself into. o0katiekins0o who backs me up when I’m in the middle of a sensitive subject. I can always depend on her to help me when I’m afraid I’m crossing a line. Broomclosetkink, Lord help me! She’s pinch hit for me when I’ve written a fic for Miz or if I just need a good laugh. She’s the best. Sweets… it’s very hard to talk about sweet-sweet-escape. I still cannot even bring myself read her stories or the ones I wrote for her without breaking down, but no one was more supportive or kind to me than Sweets. I miss her so much.

Then there’s all the love and support I received from everyone during The Fic That Shall Not Be Named debacle. That’s when I knew how much this fandom (well, this ship, really) had my back! I will never forget how much love and support I received. Bless you all!

I’m forgetting people and I hate that. But I really do love all my fandom friends as if I see them and hang out with them every day. I mean that.

Okay, Mrs, here’s one for you (I’m going back to the list for this one because I like it and I think it’s interesting): What’s the most difficult thing about writing characters of the opposite sex?

Mrs: See, see I said you knew loads of people!

As for your question that’s easy to answer...knowing what it feels like when they get aroused and orgasm. I’m more than happy being female but it would be kind of interesting just to be a guy for one day. It would improve my writing no end.

On a wider note when it comes to writing characters I don’t think any of us made it easy on ourselves when we decided to try to write being a high functioning sociopathic genius. I think I can speak for most of us when I say he’s not the easiest person to try to write authentically. I just wish I had half his knowledge then I wouldn’t feel like such an idiot when I’m writing him.

I gave my youngest son the option of any number between 1 and 40. He chose 7 so does writing energise or exhaust you?

Lil: It absolutely energises me! I do get frustrated trying to find time to write, but actually writing does amazing things for my mental and physical self. I find that I’m much more productive around the house when I’m in the middle of a writing jag. I’ll sit and write for a while, then get up and pound out some chores (usually more quickly as to get back to my computer). Somehow, this works for me. Frankly, it’s probably got to do with my ADHD. I’m the kind of person who needs to do multiple things at once. I’m the same at work; I cannot just stand behind the registrar for 8 hours. I practically beg my managers for extra work, which they’re happy to give me.

I have an original question for you, love: How does a bad review affect you?

Mrs: I’ll be honest I don’t react well to a bad review but it does depend on whether I think it’s valid or not. You probably know each and every time I’ve had one because I will probably have sent you a screen shot and asked your opinion. Thankfully they have been few and far between, occasionally they have made me think...especially if I’m being accused of using a tired old trope and I’ve made the effort to up my game in future fics but often they are just being nasty for the sake of it.

Writing is such a personal thing though, we give a piece of ourselves in each and every fic so it’s hard to not take criticism very personally.

Same question to you Lil.

Lil: Oh, I’m a giant baby about a bad review and have been known to take it very personally. At first I brood… like really hard, thinking on the entire thing much longer than necessary. I suppose it depends on the nature and tone, for the most part though. If it’s attacking and spiteful, I’ll attack right back but if it’s coming from a ‘goodish’ place, I do try to look at my writing a bit more objectively (I don’t always succeed). Anonymous bad reviews get to me the most. The fact that I cannot reply drives me up the wall!

Okay, we’re wrapping this up (else we could go on forever!) Thanks so much and a big thanks to Aine for organizing this as well!

Mrs & Lil

Next Week:

Posting on Friday 01 March it’s @ohaine ‘s turn (eek!) to interview @ashockinglackofsatin

#content creator interviews #lilsherlockian1975 #mrsmcrieff #sherlolly #sherlock #mentions of lemony goodness

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izukillme-moved · 6 years ago

Note

*cracks knuckles before typing* Here we go: Fic/Drabble anything that you are comfortable with. 1. First of all, Jelray (because Jelray): “It doesn't matter if we can't describe it–we both feel this way.” (taken from a Tumblr prompt) 2. Gratsu: “And that is why I come to you over everyone else. That is why you are my boyfriend.” I can and WILL give more since I am bubbling up with ideas and at the same time can't save myself by writing them since I'll probably ruin it.

Okay, so here it is! I’ll edit and post the Gratsu later because I really wanna post this aah!!

The first time Gray sees Jellal Fernandes, he knows he isdone for.

He meets Jellal through Lyon. Jellal works at the library Lyonfrequents every so often when he feels he’s thumbed through his book collectiontoo many to pick up one from it. When Gray’s local library closes down, as atired college student (read tired corpse), he is obligated to go to this‘amazing library’ that Lyon describes as having a really good selection ofnovels, research books, magazines and whatnot.

The instant Gray lays eyes upon Jellal, he knows exactlywhat that evil glint in Lyon’s eyes was.

Damn it all! hecurses the silver-haired devil that is his older sibling.

For once, for once,he thought his brother would be nice and kind and show him to a library wherethere are no stunningly hot boys to distract Gray, he thought he could ignorethe look on Lyon’s face, passing it off as his usual smug smirk, but no. Lyon’s not that nice, and Grayshould know that by now.

Jellal is tall, half an inch taller than even Gray himself. He’sgot natural blue hair – now Gray wouldbe sceptical, but one of his ex-boyfriends and current best friend has naturalbright pink hair, so yeah - and a strange red tattoo working its way down theright side of his face. Oh, and did Gray mention that Jellal has the mostbeautiful, kindest brown eyes that seem to hold the entire universe in them,constellations, asteroids and all? His smile is like the sun, and it lights up Gray’sworld every time Jellal so much as looks at him.

In short, this boy is perfect, and Gray does not knowwhether to kill or thank Lyon for this gift from the heavens.

He decides to hold off on both, preferring to maintain thathe is in no way interested in how pretty Jellal is, or how his brown eyessparkle just so when the light hits them.

–

“Ugh!” Gray grunts as he searches through the racks for a book;he knows he saw it here yesterday. itcan’t have gone, there aren’t many people who even know who Stephen Hawking or RichardFeynman or Michael Faraday are, let alone like their –

“Are you looking for TheDreams That Stuff Is Made Of?” a kind voice comes from behind him.

Gray turns around, almost losing his balance, and issurprised to see Jellal, a small blush on his cheeks, holding in his hands the verybook Gray has been wanting for so, so long.

“Yes, oh my god,” he says in surprise, reaching out to takeit. “How did you-”

“Not many people like this book, it’s been checked out exactlythree times,” says Jellal, hand scratching his neck. He gives a small chuckle,and Gray knows that he would pay good money to just listen to that one sound forthe rest of his life. “I love physics, and I thought I would try it,”

Gray’s jaw drops. “Me too,” he says. “It’s so interesting!”

“You really think so?” Jellal’s pretty eyes widen, and hesmiles. “That’s awesome. We should talk sometime. I guess you know my namebecause it’s on my card,” here he laughs a little, and it sounds like the pealof bells in heaven, “but I never caught yours,”

“Gray,” Gray says, breathless. “I’m Gray Fullbuster.”

Jellal smiles in amazement. “no way. Ultear’s littlebrother?”

“You know Ul?” Gray questions in surprise.

“Yeah. She’s my best friend’s girlfriend,” grins Jellal.

“Wait, what?!” Gray leaps up. “You’re Erza Scarlet’s best friend? You’re that Jellal? The one she just won’t shut up about, the guy who tookcare of her till her real family located her? I should have known, Jellal isn’ta common name,”

“Yup,” Jellal says with a proud smile. “Erza’s mentioned youa couple of times to me. There was a lot of winking and suggestive smilinginvolved,” he says thoughtfully. “She has a tendency to act really weird attimes.”

Gray blushes to the tips of his ears and looks away. Heknows exactly what Erza means whenshe looks like that.

“Anyway, I should be getting back to work.” Jellal says witha little smile, handing the book out to Gray. “It was nice meeting you, GrayFullbuster!” And he runs off.

Gray stares after Jellal’s retreating back, the spot wherehis fingers brushed against Jellal’s burning oddly.

Damn it all, he curseshimself. Damn you, Jellal Fernandes.

–

It has been exactly three months, sixteen days, ten hoursand forty-five seconds since Gray met Jellal.

Not like he’s counting, of course. Certainly not.

Not like he wheedled out Jellal’s birthday (Jellal did thesame, he might add) and wrote it into his phone calendar – it’s the fourteenthof November – so he can wish the guy a happy birthday.

Not like he likes him.No, not at all.

Jellal now regularly makes it a point to say a hello to Grayand ask him how he’s doing every time he drops by.

(Which is becoming more and more frequent. Of course, Grayrefuses to admit that it’s for Jellal – he stubbornly maintains that it’s becausethe books at his own local library aren’t enough for him anymore, but even he struggles to believe that nowadays.)

Gray makes it a point to blush a little and stammer out, “Thanks.I’m doing okay, how about you?”

And then Jellal will inevitably launch into a story aboutErza’s friend Millianna and her cats – “terrible, nasty creatures,”, Jellal rants– a story Gray would have heard from Erza not an hour before, but he findshimself listening avidly, hanging off of every word that comes out of Jellal’s mouth.

“And then – and then the stupid thing nearly ripped apart asweater I’d been working on for almost a month,”Jellal yells exasperatedly, clutching fistfuls of his pretty blue hair. “I’m makingit for someone really special, see, and I can’t afford any more expensive yarn!”

“I didn’t know you knitted,” says Gray. He really didn’t –but it isn’t that surprising. Jellal is the kind of guy who seems like he likesknitting, and baking cookies, and all that sort of grandmotherly thing.

What is surprising is that Jellal is poor. His polite, cultureddemeanour and excellent grooming wouldn’t tell you that. But, well, it shouldn’tbe so surprising – Gray himself comes from a large business family, and is currentlystudying to be its next head, but you can’t tell by looking at the scruffy messhe is. Gray almost offers to buy Jellal some more yarn just in case, but biteshis tongue. It might come across as very rude.

“Not many people do,” Jellal says with a little smile. “Ifeel like I can tell you anything, though.”

Gray’s breath hitches.

“Y – yeah,” he says nervously. “Yeah, sure.”

–

It’s ten am on the fourteenth of November, and Gray standsoutside the library, chewing his lip, holding the little wrapped gift in hishand.

Should he be doing this?

Probably not.

Is it a thing that friends do for each other?

Are he and Jellal even friends?

Shut up, me.

Gray takes a breath in and pushes the doors open. It’s toolate now – he can’t turn back, and he won’t.

I’m going to do this.

He walks in and sees none other than Jellal, lifting a cupcaketo his mouth to take a bite. Gray can tell it’s strawberry on instinct, knowingwhat kind of cake Erza likes to give her friends on their birthdays. It has alittle number twenty on it, and Gray smiles a bit – that’s cute of her. He knowsshe baked it herself.

“Hey,” Gray greets.

“Gray?” Jellal sets his cake down. “Hi! How are you doingtoday?”

Gray shoves the gift at him and attempts to smile. “Happybirthday.”

Jellal gasps. “You remembered?”

Gray shifts in place. “Well, yeah? Is that a question?”

“No, but-” he pulls the wrapper open, long fingers carefulnot to tear it. It’s cute how he is so meticulous about it.

Friends can be thought of as cute. They can, Gray insists to himself.

He is brought out of his thoughts as Jellal gasps, eyes flyingwide open. He stares disbelievingly at the brand-new (second-generation, butGray feared buying the new fourth-generation one would be going overboard) iPodTouch in his palm.

“Gray – I can’t accept this-” he begins, pushing it backtowards him. “It must have cost you a fortune, how even-”

Gray cuts him off with a slight blush. “It’s not a problem. Youmentioned you like Linkin Park. It has all their albums except The Hunting Partybecause you don’t like that one. What are friends for, stupid? Just accept thegift.”

Jellal looks in awe at the iPod. “Thank you, Gray, but-” Heputs it back in Gray’s hands.

“Jellal, take it. It’s really not a problem. Trust me.” Graysays firmly, closing Jellal’s fingers around the touchscreen device. “Theearphones are in the case, too,” he adds, pointing at the neat little pile ofwrapper on the desk. “Try it out – I hear the sound quality is amazing.”

Jellal stares at him unsurely. “Gray-”

Gray grabs the box with a roll of his eyes, pulls out theearphones, plugs them into the iPod and shoves one into Jellal’s ear.

“Pick a song,” he whispers, putting the other one into hisown ear.

Jellal hesitates, but turns the iPod on, shuffling throughthe song list. He stops and smiles at one name, then presses the ‘start’ button.

Gray’s eyes widen as the first bars of his favourite songbegin to play in his ears.

“Castle of Glass,” he realises.

“’Cause I’m only a crackin this castle of glass,” Jellal sings along. He has the voice of an angelas well.

They spend some time listening to all Jellal’s favouritesongs – which happen to be Gray’s as well. Iridescentis a particular hit with the both of them.

“So let it go, let it go,” hums Jellal.

(If he’s being completely honest, Gray is more listening to Jellalsing along in bliss than anything.)

And they stay like that for a long while, until Gray realiseshe has to meet Lucy for their English project. They’re assigned partners, andshe’ll kill him if he’s late.

“Jellal, I have to go. I’m meeting a friend for a project, I’mreally sorry!” he says with a bow of apology.

Jellal’s eyes widen. “Don’t you dare apologise, you’ve givenme the best gift you could,” he says vehemently. “I – I can’t thank you enough.”

Gray smiles a little awkwardly and runs out of the librarywith a “You’re welcome!”.

Jellal Fernandes has himso screwed.

–

Fast forward to the twenty-fifth of December, Christmas.

And also, Gray’s nineteenth birthday.

Gray grins as his cousin Juvia whirls him around one last timebefore going off to dance with her girlfriends, Levy and Mirajane. “See you!”he calls after her, and she turns back to shoot him a smirk.

“Waiting on someone?” Erza asks, sidling up next to him witha suggestive smile. “Someone by the name of Jellal Fernandes?”

“No,” Gray says. “And that wasn’t subtle at all, Erza.”

“Mm, I know.” Erza grins. “But dense idiots like the two ofyou don’t get subtlety, so…”

“I invited him, but he said he might be a bit busy.” Graysays hastily. “Said not to wait on him. So that’s exactly what I’m not doing.”

“Would be a shame,” says a familiar voice from behind him.

Gray turns in shock to see Jellal, holding a lumpy wrappedpresent in his arms. The wrapping has flying reindeer and a little Santa on it –it must be old Christmas paper, but it’s the effort that counts, and Gray can’tstop a small smile from painting itself onto his face. He’s excited, he realises, something he hasn’tbeen all night – happy, yes, for his closest family is here, but not excited.

“You came,” Gray breathes. Erza has slipped off to god knowswhere, but Gray is glad she isn’t here, to be honest.

Jellal laughs. “Took me a while. Nice place you got here. I seenow why the iPod wasn’t a problem.”

And the way he says it, so light-hearted and friendly unlikea lot of others, warms Gray’s heart.

“Yeah,” he says quietly.

Jellal looks a little ashamed of himself, handing the giftto Gray. “It’s not cool, like anything you’re probably used to,” he says uncomfortably.“But, well, this is the most I could do. Sorry.”

Gray rolls his eyes and takes the gift. “It’s fine – it’sreally nice of you to even get me a gift, Jellal,” he says.

Gray holds the lumpy package tentatively. It is soft and pillow-like,and he can almost guess what’s inside. He takes his time to unwrap it,unwinding each piece of cheap Sellotape slowly and carefully.

Once he is done, a beautiful cream sweater spills into hisarms. Gray kneels and puts the wrapper on the floor, holding up the lovelyknitted article of clothing. It has an exquisitely detailed snowflake, in varyingshades of blue – is that silk – in thecentre, and two simple bands of the same blue silk near the wrists andneckline. It’s knitted even better than most of the luxury brands you’d see instores, and Gray clutches the fabric to his chest. It must be custom-made – it’s absolutely beautiful, and Gray wants toput it on immediately.

“This must have cost you so much-” he says in shock. “It’sgot to be custom-made, you wouldn’t see anything so amazing in a store-”

Jellal shakes his head with a smile. “I knit, remember?”

Gray’s jaw drops, and he recalls a certain conversationbetween himself and Jellal.

“And then – and then the stupid thing nearly ripped apart asweater I’d been working on for almost a month,”he’d ranted, and then explained why it was so important.

“I’m making it for someone really special, see,”

That special someone…

Was him.

Gray shakes his head.

“You went to all that trouble, spent money on real, actualsilk – for me?!” he says in utterdisbelief.

Jellal rubs his head. “It wasn’t that much trouble,” he answers.“Really, Gray, it’s not much at all,”

“Shut up,” Graysays, staring at the masterpiece in his hands. “I’m wearing this right now.”

And to prove his point, he shucks off the suit jacket he’sbeen wearing all night and slips into the cosy comfort of the sweater instead. Itfeels even more amazing than it looks, and Gray lets out a sigh of pleasure.

Jellal stares at him, and Gray cannot fathom why until –

“God, I can’t take this anymore,” he breathes, and suddenlyhis hands are on Gray’s hips, pulling him closer, and then he smashes his mouthinto Gray’s.

Gray makes an ‘Mmph!’noise at first, startled by the sudden kiss, but soon melts into it, kissingback with equal vigour. Jellal’s hands trace Gray’s hips, coming up to rest inhis hair, and Gray’s hands draw patterns on his back, pulling him closer,closer, closer till there is no room between them anymore.

The kiss is soft and sweet and loving and fiery andpassionate all at the same time. Gray’s insides are on fire, and his heart isburning with something he cannot place.Sure, he’s been kissed, has kissed others before, but not like this. Never likethis.

“Shit,” he gasps when they finally break apart for air.

Jellal’s cheeks are red. His eyes are wide. His tattoo isalmost invisible with how much he’s blushing.

“I’m sorry – I shouldn’t have done that. I crossed a line. Ihave to go. I better go.” he gabbles and runs off.

“Jellal – wait!” Gray shouts, trying to chase after him,hand outstretched. But Jellal has melted into the huge crowds, and Gray cannot spothim anymore.

He sinks onto the floor, clutching fistfuls of his newsweater.

–

The next day, Gray marches into the library to see Jellal lookingsadly into a book – the same physics book, TheDreams That Stuff Is Made Of.

He walks straight up to the older boy and grabs his collar.

Jellal looks up in surprise. “Gray-” he begins.

“No,” Gray half-shouts. “I’m not letting you run away. It doesn’tmatter if you can’t describe it – we both feel this way. I’ve liked you fromthe minute I saw you. Your cuteness and your personality didn’t help matters.”

“I – what?” Jellal looks absolutely furious. “There is noway someone like you deserves someone like me. I’m not good enough. I bet youhated that kiss.”

“I don’t know how it felt – it was too short for me to tell.”Gray says. “Kiss me again and I’ll tell you exactly what I think.”

And he doesn’t wait for an answer, pulling Jellal’s body towardshis. Melding their lips.

The kiss is eternity itself to Gray, and when they finally resurfaceto breathe, he says in a daze, “That was the best kiss I’ve ever had.”

“What-”

“Go out with me, Jellal.” Gray’s daze is gone now. He leanshis elbows on the desk and stares into Jellal’s eyes. “Go out with me.”

“Okay.” Jellal mutters.

–

“And that is the story of how Gray and Jellal ended up gettingmarried like the idiots they are,” Erza announces proudly, lifting her glass. “Tothe grooms!”

They all drink, and the newlyweds share a shy glance.

Jellal places his palm over Gray’s.

He smiles, and Gray smiles back.

Meeting you was thebest thing that ever happened to me.

Hope you liked it!! I will be editing and adding the Gratsu soon enough, hopefully that doesn’t turn into a 3k thing like this did xD@tardisthroughthefandoms, you’d asked me to @you, so I did haha

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mythmica · 7 years ago

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Ezra’s Day

Surprise! So this is my @rebelsgiftexchange submission for @redrikki! (Sorry it took a bit, irl stuff got in the way and I wanted to make sure it was perfect (especially since this is the first fic I’ve done lol) before posting. Hope you like it!

A/N: So for this fic I thought it’d be interesting to see how another “Empire Day” later down the storyline would have turned out. This is set around season 3.

Word Count: 1746

"Ezra."

The boy looked up at his father, who knelt down and placed a hand on his shoulder.

The man lowered his voice. "We have to stand up for people in need. Especially those in trouble with the Empire." he gestured towards the stormtroopers in the distance, and then at the frightened faces of the crowd. "Remember, if we don't stand up, who will?"

Ezra tightened his grip on his father's hand before looking away. He blinked. Suddenly, the sky was overcast, and the plaza was empty.

"I'm proud of you, son." he turned back to his father and gasped. His face, previously youthful, had suddenly aged, and streaks of grey marked his hair.

Ezra tugged his hand away and stepped back, trembling. "Dad?"

He smiled sadly. "Remember, son. No matter what, stay strong…” Ezra's vision began to darken.

"And have hope.”

Ezra woke up with a start, sitting up to check his surroundings.

He was still on his bunk. It was dark and the room was quiet, save for Zeb's light snores below him. He exhaled and lay back down.

It had been a while since he had a dream about his parents. Not since he found out that they were gone for good. He rubbed at the tears in his eyes before closing them.

Figures, considering what today is, he thought bitterly.

Empire day. His birthday. No matter how old he got, no matter how much he tried to forgot the so called "holiday", each year the day was a painful reminder to what he'd lost. And a couple of years ago, he'd probably still be on the streets, hungry, alone, and afraid, under the empire's tight fist in capitol city.

But things had changed. He'd found a new family, and new hope as they inspired and taught him to fight back against the Empire's tyranny.

He wasn't a loth rat who only looked out for himself anymore. He was a rebel. And thanks to Kanan, he was a jedi.

Ezra smiled for a moment before frowning. His recent birthdays hadn't gone too well. He had just turned fifteen on the day the crew got mixed up in a mission to get Tseebo off Lothal. On his sixteenth the crew had split up for separate missions.

Today he turned seventeen, and he couldn't help but hope for today to be mission-free, or for Hera to at least have a simple one planned.

After trying (and failing) to go back to sleep, he slowly made his way off his bunk and trudged to the kitchen, where he poured himself some water and sat at the table. Hopefully Chopper wasn't lurking around- he wasn't in the mood to deal with the grumpy droid, and he didn't want to risk having him alert the rest of the crew that he was up this early.

Yawning, he propped his head up the table and debated brewing some caf. Might as well, since he didn’t want to risk another dream like that. He finished the water and began rummaging in the cabinets.

“Bit early to be making breakfast, isn’t it?”

Ezra jumped, and then grinned sheepishly as Kanan walked in. "I was just planning on making some caf. Sorry if I woke you."

"You didn't." he answered. "At least, not because you were making noise."

Guilt tugged at him. Kanan could always tell when something was up, and Ezra had been so distracted by the dream that'd he had forgotten to shield himself through the force- which means his fear and stress was what alerted him to his padawan's status.

"The caf can wait. It's not a good idea this early anyway." he strode past him to take a seat at the table. “So, what’s bothering you?”

Ezra sighed and poured two glasses of water before walking over to the table. He offered the glass to Kanan, who accepted it, before sitting across from him.

“Bad dream.”

“Because of today?”

“Yeah. Long live the Empire, huh?” Ezra picked at the table. “With how long it’s been it’s sure starting to feel like it will live forever.”

Kanan frowned. “Kid. I know today’s hard for you.” He sighed. “It is for all of us. But you know what helps me?” He set the glass down. “Looking at how much things have changed. Sure, the Empire’s still around. But so is the Rebellion. And we’re part of something much bigger now than it was a couple of years ago.” He grinned. “So things will change, ok? Just gotta have hope.”

Ezra smiled. “You’re right. But...it’s still just-“

“-Hard. I know. And it’s ok to feel down about it. Especially since it’s your birthday, and I know you’re probably thinking about your parents right?” he said softly. “Is that what the dream was about?”

Kanan felt a spike of sadness from his padawan and continued. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, alright? Just know that I’m here for you. We all are.”

There was a pause. “Even Chopper?”

The man laughed. “Even Chopper. Well, most of the time.”

Ezra chuckled before swallowing the lump in his throat. “Thanks, Kanan. For everything. It means a lot.”

“Anytime. And thank you too, ok?”

His brows furrowed. “What for?’

Kanan downed the glass of water before continuing. “For how you’ve changed and helped me as well, along with the rest of the crew. No matter what feelings today brings, just remember that we’re glad to have met you. Ok?”

Ezra reached up to rub at his eyes. “Ok.”

Kanan stood up and put both empty glasses away before returning and patting the boy’s shoulder. “Now try get some rest. It’ll help.”

Ezra nodded and stood up, turning to leave before stopping. “Kanan?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you know if Hera has anything major planned for today? Not that that would be a problem!” he stammered, “I just want to know how busy today will be.

Kanan paused to think. “I don’t think so. I mean, no missions that I know of. I’ll check with her later.”

Ezra exhaled. “Ok. Good night- er, Good morning.”

He chuckled. “Good night, Ezra.”

Kanan waited until he left before speaking up again. “You can come out now.”

Shuffling was heard before Hera appeared in the doorway, yawning. “Everything ok?”

He nodded. “Yeah. He’ll be fine. Today’s always a bit hard for him. How much did you hear?”

“Only a bit at the end. Thought it’d better to let you handle it. And to answer his question, we’ve got a free day, shockingly enough. No missions and all the errands and chores are done. So we’ve got all day to carry out Sabine’s plan.” she smiled.

Kanan smiled back. While the crew couldn’t change the bad memories today brought for Ezra, they could at least help him make some good ones.

Later that day the Ghost crew began preparing for Sabine’s plan in the common area.

Zeb groaned loudly. “Argh, when’s that kid gonna wake up? The day’ll probably be over by the time we get done waiting.”

“Keep it down, will you?” Sabine shushed him. “It’s not that late yet anyways.”

Kanan tapped the table. “He didn’t get that much sleep last night, Zeb. Give him a break.”

Chopper grumbled loudly.

“No Chopper, you’re not going to wake him up.” Hera rolled her eyes. “Knowing you you’d probably shock him.”

“You’re definitely right about that.” Ezra called out from the hall before walking in the room. “Although the chatter woke me-“ he stopped as he took in the room.

“Surprise!” the group shouted.

Ezra blinked as he looked around. There was a banner decorated in blue paint that spelled out “Happy Birthday Ezra!”, surrounded in little drawings. Probably Sabine’s handiwork. The table was covered in food, including some treats and fruits Ezra recognized from Lothal. There were also some boxes stacked up in the seat across from Kanan.

Ezra took a bit to absorb everything before speaking. “Guys… what-”

Hera walked up and put an arm around his shoulders. “We thought we’d surprise you with a little party today. I know your birthdays haven’t always been very happy, but we wanted to at least help cheer you up,” she nodded at Sabine. “It was Sabine’s idea.”

Ezra turned to look at her and she grinned.

“Sabine, I-“ he swallowed the lump in his throat and smiled. “Thank you. All of you.”

“Don’t thank us yet, kid, wait till we finish all this grub!” Zeb yelled reaching for the table.

The rest of the day was spent eating, laughing, talking. There were even stories, Hera recalling how she met Kanan, Zeb boasting about his achievements from when he was in the Honor Guard.

Then came the gifts. Ezra couldn’t remember the last time he’d celebrated a birthday, much least received a birthday gift.

A new helmet from Zeb.

A necklace with a stone pendent from Hera.

A couple of credits from Chopper. (He suspected they were probably from Hera.)

A painting of the entire Ghost crew from Sabine.

And a journal from Kanan. It was half empty, the first half being full of messages written by each of the team along with drawings, jokes, and other things. “For when you’re feeling down or we’re all separated on missions and whatnot.” he explained. “Figured it might help.”

Ezra set the journal down next to the other gifts and brushed his eyes before looking up. “I- I don’t know what to say.” he laughed.

Sabine put a hand on his shoulder. “It’s ok. We just wanted to help make today a bit brighter. Did it work?”

Ezra grinned. “Yeah. It really did. Thank you.”

Soon enough they all left to get ready for bed, each wishing Ezra happy birthday again before they left. Now it was just him and Kanan once again.

But before Ezra turned to head back to his cabin after saying goodnight, Kanan spoke up again. “Ezra.”

He turned back. “Yeah?”

“I’m proud of you. We all are. You’ve grown so much as a rebel, as a jedi , and as a good person. Your parents would be proud.

Ezra was unable to stop from letting his tears spill this time, and hugged his master after stammering out his thanks.

He wouldn’t remember today as a painful reminder of what he had lost. Instead he would remember what he had now. A new family, a new sense of strength, and a new hope.

#rebelsfourthexchange #rebelsgiftexchange #star wars rebels #swr #star wars rebels fanfiction #long post

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working-on-becoming-a-better-me · 4 years ago

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Day 253—Mar. 23, 2021

Okay, so the numbers for my previous consecutive posts were off by a day (like a day ahead) and February 7′s math was way off, but I googled this! so from here on out, we will be accurate! let’s go bois!

BIG UPDATE BOIS! Essentially? I’VE GOTTEN BETTER! Mental health is better, habits are better, outlook on life is better, productivity... isn’t as high as it was when I first started the blog, but it’s doing MUCH better than November and even January.

coping with minecraft:

So, I’m still addicted to the dream smp minecraft fandom. my friend got me a dream hoodie, bucket hat, and a georgenotfound hoodie for my birthday. but! I’m coping better. I’m behind on streams, and am now catching up during Spring Break. For a while, I was pushing back school work to watch and catch up on streams. I promised myself that during free periods I would work since I was catching up on streams at home, and then... yeah. ANYWAY! I’ve gotten a lot better at that recently by noticing that even fanart accounts (accounts dedicated to mcyt-ers) were talking about how they didn’t watch a phasmaphobia stream because they weren’t interested in it, or talking about how they were behind on streams... it really helped me accept the fact that I can be a real fan and not watch every single stream.

cultural convention:

My international school does events with other international schools but because of covid, we can’t travel. I act and made varsity drama (we call it a different name, but yeah!) and we had virtual conferences. I was incredibly friendly and loud and there were tons of zoom calls. Our schools kinda known for being... uh, stuck up? and kinda elitist. Not like I was being fake, but I was making an effort to talk during calls and be active on group chats made. I joke-flirt a lot and focused my attention on one person. A whole thing ensued, but some of the other actors in my school (there were only 11 of us) were joking abut sending me to “horny jail” and one girl kept apologizing for me. During “lounge sessions” I would interject with what I thought were funny comments and she’d say “again, I’d like to apologize for her behavior” and... uh... I cried at school. Cuz I’ve heard way too many times from too many different people about how I’m embarrassing... BUT.

What really helped was the fact that there were late night zoom calls and I was one of only three kids from my school the first night on a call with around 25 people. Other people said I helped give them a really good first impression of our school, especially considering all the things they’d heard previously. The guy I joke-flirted with (I previously dmed him asking if he was okay with it and he said he was) said on a call that I was one of the funniest people he’d met in a while. It was a huge confidence booster in knowing that the efforts I was making were paying off :)

confidence:

Since starting this blog, I’ve been trying to be nicer to myself. I’ve been practicing more positive self speak and have recently realized the difference between the way I speak about and to myself and how some other people do. Being nicer to myself out loud has helped a lot in feeling better and more comfortable.

I wanted to try wearing black masks, but my mom bought the wrong kind. They had patterns and I was really nervous because I didn’t really want to stand out. I used to not care, but... I dunno. Teenagehood and whatnot. We wear uniforms too, so the only differences are in accessories, hair, etc. I’m not sure why, but I was really nervous to wear the new mask patterns to school. But I told myself it was an experiment, to force me to be more confident. I actually forgot I was wearing it until I saw myself. And since I’d posted on my private story saying I was doing this to try and be more comfortable, some of my friends came up to me and told me it was actually cute. Shows that I really had nothing to stress for. Not that it was really self-expression, but for me, and anyone else who needs to hear this, no one cares. Maybe they even wish they had the courage to wear different things as well.

mcyt mantra:

I have a mantra now! adapted from something drunk Wilbur Soot said during Quackity’s livestream, I think. I repeat it when I’m happy and when I’m nervous or scared and I guess... I dunno, I’m like classically conditioning myself? Except not really since I’m doing it out of order. But yeah! get yourself a mantra!!!

character day:

more with confidence! spirit week is just an excuse for kids to not wear their uniforms, but I put a lot of effort into an Ace Ventura outfit I put together. I only saw around two or three other people actually dressed up as characters, but I had so much fun and thought I looked amazing. I was proud that I wasn’t a normie ;]

Also... it’s so humid in this country and the rubber bottoms of my boots actually stuck to the pavement and fell off. I spent the day without the bottoms of my shoes and it was so funny. Even my mom laughed after (she laughed for so long, it was adorable) and she said only I could pull it off and that the friend I walk to school with everyday is lucky to have me as a friend. My mom was telling me about how she never had a friend like me growing up, just so weird and goofy. And it made me happy to think that I can bring so much... zaniness to people’s lives

ao3:

been writing a lot more recently! haven’t been posting on my writing blog since it’s all fanfiction, but it’s helping me write! I update one of my stories every two weeks. When I feel like I’m not doing enough, it’s a nice reminder that I actually can be consistent. I may be getting better... who knows :)

nehs:

been editing lots of papers even though I don’t need to anymore since I made vp of my school’s nehs chapter. but it’s helping me learn too! I’m very instinctual when writing, but obviously when I’m editing I can’t just ask them to change something because “it doesn’t sound right”. So I google explanations and then tell the people who’s papers I’m editing. It helps both them and me!

ipad/drawing:

got a new ipad for my birthday. been messing around with procreate. been doodling in class (only dream team characters so far lol). might be getting better... hopefully I am!

also have a sticky notes app on my ipad and been creating to-do lists! yay!

teaching:

been teaching students in cambodia! last year I had a teaching partner who guided lessons mostly. this year I’m the leading teacher. It’s helping with my fear of leadership and responsibility.

social:

still not the most social, but more active on snapchat now with keeping in contact with some of the cultural convention kids. covids made it harder to keep in contact, and I’ve been trying to reach out more to my closest friend who I’ve not hung out with in a while. not that we don’t see each other at lunch every other day, but I walk to school with, share a class and after school study hall with another friend. so comparably, I’ve spent less time with my closest friend.

recently had a spa day with my small neighborhood gang! my friend painted my other guy friend’s nails! yes! we used face masks as well :)

general update:

- went to the pool the other day and now I’m hecka burnt

- yesterday I wrote letters for honor society points, caught up on math hw, wrote a reflection and plan for a class, reviewed chinese with my mom, met up with my “mentor” for a class

- have been helping a lot of people! am currently a part of two people’s pieces for their theater class and I have a rehearsal later today!

- was doing a lot of work as an officer of thespian honor society—I’m likely going to be on the officer team again next year and, until a few weeks ago, I hadn’t felt like I’d been doing much and was feeling unworthy. but then I was proactive about something and updated our sponser (school’s drama director) on what we as officers decided. felt... prettyyy goooodddd :)

- !!! yesterday I went on a walk and brought money and my student ID, ready to buy bubble tea, but then... I mustered up what little willpower I had and then didn’t buy it. Instead, I bought surprise lilies for my mom (and some groceries she asked me to get) - been trying to cut out unnecessary sugars and foods. if I’m not hungry, I shouldn’t eat, but also... I listen to my body and if I’m feeling really snacky, I’ll indulge - recently been craving ice cream, but not the flavors in my fridge so instead I’m just not eating ice cream at all and ate an apple once as a substitute :D

- not sure if I’ve been sleeping more, but it kinda feels like I have been?

- started taking pictures of the world when I think it’s pretty one sunny afternoon when I was laughing lots with a friend... especially right after cul con, I was taking a lot more pictures...

- just been more active (not physically... though occasionally, when bored, I’ll stretch some... but I should try and get more active (I mean... the walk yesterday?))... creatively speaking (ao3, with art), socially online (cul con kids), in person (making plans over spring break!)...

- I just feel like I’ve been putting more effort into life

of course, there are the down bits, like for one project based class where the end product is due in May-ish and it focuses on the “process”... I’m just... not... process-ing. I chose a writing project (why). I’m focusing a lot on my side projects, but not my class writing one :/ as well as that, when assignments pick up, I do too, but when I get down time I feel like I deserve it (which I do!) but I don’t work ahead. I’ve been really busy though. Teaching got cancelled because the school in Cambodia shut down unfortunately due to covid. But before spring break, I was teaching, editing papers, writing my own for lang, doing cul con and then catching up on work I missed because of cul con, studying for tests, attending rehearsals... there’s a lot going on and I need to recognize that I am doing so well, especially compared with a few months prior when I was in a much darker place.

mostly stress has been my plague, but yeah! also in the span of one week, two classes bumped up a grade (or half a grade... we have letters and + system (no -)) so my previously low gpa became slightly less low! It gave me confidence that I can end the semester strong!

procrastination: another plague. I keep delaying setting up college counseling meetings and have delayed this update for a while now... and the project-class...

also have babysitting jobs again so we gon get some monnaayyyyy! (job is not from people we met at the pool, but we did meet people at the pool and their kids liked me so much they asked me mom to get me to babysit them... another boost to confidence! yay :) I’m a likeable person :] )

thanks for sticking around! I’m glad I’m getting this update in because I’m doing... really well :D hope you guys are also doing well or that it gets better!

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so-caffeinated · 7 years ago

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Okay, SO... I think this is probably the best way to reply to my spoilery asks. Responses are below the cut. There are spoilers for all currently posted chapters including the unscheduled one posted today.

There will also be some minor spoilers in answers for future chapters.

Sound good? Here we go!

###TEMPEST SPOILERS BELOW###

(1) Hi!! Long time lurker, first time commenter and I just have to say how much I love your stories!! Two guesses on the Jules/husband spoiler. 1) You mentioned the fact that Jules' husband is good at dancing, and an anon asked if she and her husband met through dancing. You replied no, which makes me lean towards Alex being her husband since Jules and Jackson's first meeting is when he's photographing her while she's dancing

(2) Also in the same ask, you talked about Jules dancing by herself at a BBQ to get her husband's attention, which is something I can picture happening at a Will's house with the other firemen. 2) You said in response to a different ask that Jules is a better cook than the other kids because she bonds with her mother-in-law over it. You also characterized their relationship as having the "potential to be very rocky."

(3) Because Alex's dad died in the Undertaking, I feel like Jules' status as a Queen could potentially make for an awkward conversation at Thanksgiving. :) Hope these make sense!! Thank you for sharing your work and characters with us!!!

FFS, Anon. You should have seen my eyes bug out when I read these. Wow. You’re awfully close to spot-on here. The ‘Jules dancing by herself at a BBQ to get her husband’s attention which is something I can picture happening at Will’s house with the other firemen’ is ABSURD. It’s Alex’s house, not Will’s, but otherwise... basically, yeah. Chapter after next, Anon. Chapter after next... and WHEW, it’s a scene.

She will - though not during Tempest - bond with her mother-in-law largely over cooking. When Jules is committed, she gives her whole self and her whole heart. By the time she falls in love with Alex, she loves all of him. That means his heritage and culture, too. So she learns Spanish and she tries more Mexican foods and she learns to cook some of it, amongst other things. That said... winning over Mama Castillo is not gonna be easy. She liked Alex’s on-again/off-again ex-girlfriend. And... Jules is ten years younger than Alex, she’s not Catholic, she’s not Mexican-American, and she’s a Queen. Alex is her only child and Jules is far from the woman she’d pictured for her little boy.

So I think I know who Jules husband might be. I previous asks you said that if her husband hadn't met Jules, in the other timeline, he would probably have had a daughter with his on again off again girlfriend and I think you said before that Alex(?) had an on again off again girlfriend ( or it was in a chapter)? So I think her husband is Alex.

This is one of those types of spoilers that I forget that I’ve said, but yes. In the other universe he’d have had a daughter with Marisol, his on-again/off-again ex-girlfriend. Having a baby fixes nothing in a relationship, though, and they would have ultimately ended things for good. But Alex never finds something in that universe like what he has with Jules here. There’s nothing even close. Excellent catch, Anon.

I know you can’t respond to this yet but OMG JACKSON NOO POOR JULES IM CRYING IT WAS SO GOOOOOD

ANON! Thank you. Also? I wrote that scene on my birthday. It’d been in my head forever, so it was good to finally get it out, but oh lord... it wasn’t easy. I love Jackson. I really, really do. Killing him was rough.

I am at work reading Tempest and OH MY GOD! This is AMAZING. Your writing is just incredible. I mean, it always has been but this is just beyond. That death. I wasn't expecting it and I had no idea I was so attached to that character! I'm sobbing! And I was already invested in Jules but now I feel 10x more invested in her and her story. I'm so excited to see where all this goes. THANK YOU! This is truly a gift.

Thank you, Anon! That death scene is one of the few things I’ve written that felt like they came out exactly as I pictured. And it’s been in my head a long time. I’m so, so glad you’re invested in this story because it’s entirely hijacked my life. It well and truly has. And being able to share it with people who appreciate it genuinely means the world.

Omg I love tempest. I was majorly shocked with Jacksons death though ...you definitely made me tear up being the amazing writer you are. Can you confirm that it's Alex now as her husband ? I don't know how I will survive waiting till next week!!!!!

Clearly, I couldn’t wait til next week either. THANK YOU! And yes, yes I can confirm now that Alex is her eventual husband. Julex rises, my friend!

Ok did Jackson fake his own death to protect her please say yes is he Sentinel and they will find each other again cause I’m just really heartbroken I know it’s for a reason but I really loved Jackson like a lot and now I’m so sad but thanks for the story I kind of wanted the whole thing out so I could read it all I know that’s a bit selfish but when I read I can’t put it down .

Oh, Anon... He did not. I’m sorry. I love Jackson a lot, too, and killing him was hard, but it was absolutely necessary. I wouldn’t have done it otherwise. I’m glad you’re enjoying the story! I can understand wanting to read it all at once. You can, eventually? If that’s an consolation? But I’m glad you’re loving it even weekly (or slightly more than weekly when I get impulsive).

I just read the prologue and the first chapter and if you want me I’ll be sitting in the corner crying my heart out. literal tears are pouring out of my eyes. This is gonna be so painful. and when he calls her Julie I feel my heart breaking into pieces WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME JANIS? I DIDNOT ASK FOR THESE EMOTIONS!!!

I am mean and horrible and honestly how do you not know that by now? Sorry. I’m kidding. Maybe I shouldn’t be. SO... is it painful? Yes. But more than that it’s hopeful. At it’s core, this is a story about learning to live with loss instead of just surviving it. I think there’s a lot of joy and optimism in it, too. And I’m pretty sure you’ll agree with me there in time. There are ups and downs, progression and regression... Coping with something like this, getting to a place where you’re more than just okay, isn’t the kind of thing that happens in a straight line. But how Jules learns and copes and changes her viewpoint is really the heart of the story. And there are a lot of emotions ahead. Buy wine, chocolate and tissues.

OH MY GOD JANIS!!! You're killing me today! First with your amazing new story and then I went to your pinterest page and... Sylvia Castillo??? I'm dead now!!!

You were the first one to catch this, Anon! The Pinterest page has undergone more changes since you sent me this, too. But... YES... Sylvia Castillo. Genuinely one of the sweetest children to ever exist fictionally or otherwise.

Yay!!! I knew hubby was Alex!!!!! So happy to be right! Love this story so much. Jules is my fave

Thank you, Anon! I’m happy you’re right, too, because Julex is my ship. (Okay I have lots of ships, but Julex is... whew). Glad you’re enjoying it, Anon. Thank you!

Alex marries Jules omg I knew it I had a sliver of hope for my bud Jackson but then you know he’s dead and all break my heart a little bit but at least Alex’s is cool are we at the point where you can confirm this lol cause Pinterest just gave stuff away so you know just wondering please say yes;)

LOL, yes, anon, I will confirm. And thank you! I do adore Jackson (and hey there are infinite universes so he’s out there... somewhere... right?), but it’s Julex for me. Alex is an awesome guy and I can’t wait for you guys to see more of him. I love him like crazy. And you guys are way more active on my Pinterest page than I’d realized!

I love Tempest so far and I'm excited to read more about Jules' journey ! Your writing makes me look forward to Monday mornings and starting the week ( even though some chapters are more heart breaking than others lol) Poor Jackson and Jules, I thought that they might break up because of Jules keeping team Arrow a secret but I didn't want to believe that Jackson would die because he was so sweet and made Jules happy. I'm excited to read more about Jules, thank you for writing ! <3

Thank you, Anon! Jackson was sweet and he did make Jules happy. He would never have left her... not for anything, really. He loved her so much. You will get to see some of that still, even though he’s gone. Both through Jules and other sources. But her journey is mostly about learning to live with having lost him and how to cope with that in a better way. There is a lot of heartbreak in this story, but I also think there’s a lot of love and joy, too. For sure, we are not done with the tears. But we’ve barely scratched the surface on the good stuff. Promise. ;-)

After Jackson's death (soonish after and later on) does Jules have any sort of relationship with Jackson's family( mom, dad, sister) since you said they liked Jules ? Or would it have been too painful for all of them ? Would they have visited Jackson's dog ?

This is a great question. I actually had originally planned a scene between Jules and Jackson’s mom but never wound up writing it. They were both going to be visiting his grave. Jules does still keep in touch with them. They don’t live locally or anything, but she and Bokeh are a connection to Jackson still. I think more than anything else, she and Jackson’s mom and sister e-mail each other. She probably sends them invitations to the occasional art exhibit or whatnot. They aren’t fantastically close, but there’s still affection and a link between them.

You probably can't answer this (yet?) because it's too spoilery but with Jules eventual husband ... does their relationship start the traditional way (asked out on dates, she tells family/friends etc) or is it more of a secret/affair that they try to hide for a while? (I ask this because my theory is Alex is her husband and as one of Will's friends/coworkers, and Jules currently only looking for sex and not emotions, things start more hidden, if that makes sense)

You’re close, Anon. I’m gonna say you’re half right. Watch for the fifth full chapter (after the prologue so AO3 will call it chapter 6). You’ll get this fully answered there.

OMG!!!! IT'S ALEX!!! I WAS RIGHT!!!! I AM SO HAPPY!!! I have been firm in this suspicion ever since the ameliam babysitting sylvia chapter! I completely missed the name hint and I speak Spanish and Castillo is the last name of some of my extended family lol. Anyways this is awesome!!! Now I'm curious about Will's reaction to his friend dating his little sister.

Thank you!!! Will’s reaction... is something that probably depends on what exactly he knows and how he knows it, don’t you think? You’ll get to see that... though it’s a bit further down the line.

sooo, is working with two of his siblings-in-law ever weird for Will, or... ? --- (I know you can't talk about that, I just can't wait until you finally can!!!)

You’re assuming some things about Ellie and Sara here, Anon! But with Will and Alex, once Jules and Alex are really firmly together and later married, I think it takes a lot of adjusting. For one thing, they can’t have quite the same conversations they did before, can they? Alex is not discussing his love life with Will anymore, you know? But they trust and love each other as family as it is. They’ve had each other’s backs for a very long time. And that’s not something that’s going to change.

OH MY WORD. OH MY WORD. WE'RE ONLY TWO CHAPTERS IN & WORDS CANNOT ACCURATELY EXPRESS MY LOVE OF THIS STORY. ALSO I AM BEYOND UPSET THAT I DIDNT NOTICE THAT CONNECTION. A Castle for a Queen....I'M SOBBING. I've had a theory for a long time that Jackson would die, Will would be severely injured in a fire, & Jules would meet Alex as Will is being loaded into the ambulance/taken into surgery. You said a while back that when Jules & Alex meet something else is demanding her attention so... ;).

NO ONE caught that I was giving a Queen a Castle. NO ONE. Not even people who knew who she wound up with. I pat myself on the back a lot. I felt very JKR-like for that. You got awfully close with your theory there, Anon! Very, very close. Great guess!

Hi so I'd planned on my next message being far more eloquent but NOPE SORRY I HAVE ZERO CHILL IM SHRIEKING OH MY WORD. THIS CHAPTER WAS INCREDIBLE. ALL THE HEART EYES 😍😍😍😍😍😍😉😍😍AND AMELIAM. OMW AMELIA. AND THE PREGNANCY SCARE. AND ELARA. ALSO ITS HAPPENING. CHAPTER FOUR. THE BBQ. JULES DANCING. ALEX COMBUSTING. I HAVE LESS THAN ZERO CHILL. AND HIS "JULIANNA." I LOVE THAT HES THE ONLY ONE THAT CALLS HER THAT. I SHIP IT LIKE FREAKING FED-EX. 🏰♥️👸🏻

I love this so much? LOL. Ameliam... Yeah... my ‘damn it Amelia’ tag is earned. You’ll find out more about that later. Also about the pregnancy scare. Chapter four is actually more plotty than anything else, but chapter five is the BBQ and chapter six is... you’ll like chapter six. Alex always calls her Julianna. Never Jules or Julie or anything else except some nicknames.... which you’ll get to in a bit. He has a few. I AM SO GLAD YOU SHIP IT! I love Julex so much! Thank you!

Oh man I know Tempest is going to be soooo good! Today's chapter has to be one of my favorites with everything going on! Finally Jules and Alex are in the open and I adore them so much and am so excited to see more from them. Also ever since I first found out about them I have been wanting to see Will's reaction to it and if it is anything like with Javi it is going to be very interesting and really entertaining to see. Also wow, Amelia did get married and Will thought he was going to be a dad😱

Thank you! I loved this chapter. And Julex... oh Julex... they have so much more to see. I am beyond excited to share more! You’ll get Will’s reaction, too, but that’s a bit further on in the story. Amelia... did get married. She did. Not the best choice she ever made, let’s leave it at that for now. Will - very briefly - did think he might be going to be a dad. I think his own reaction to that surprised him, especially given the circumstances, and I reeeeeeeeeeeally wanna write that. Like right now. It’s a Big Moment with some major parallels.

OH. MY. GOD! THANK YOU for posting Chapter 3 early. I'm SO obsessed with this story! Questions because of course ... How old is Alex? At this point in the story, does Sara know how Ellie feels about her? Without getting too spoilery, does Sara know how she feels about Ellie at this point (platonic or otherwise)? Also ... Amelia got married????!!!!

Alex is 34 and Jules is 24 in this story. She’s not-quite-ten-years younger than him. Sara does know how Ellie feels about her and Sara also knows how she feels about Ellie. It’s not exactly as simple as that, though. Which you’ll get to later. And Amelia did get married and I AM SORRY but she did. She did. It wasn’t her best choice ever, but there we go. There will be more on that later, but not in Tempest. Thank you!!

FiCoN just keeps getting better and better and I'm really looking forward to everything that is left! P.S. I think it really is a testament to your writing ability how even though I already knew Alex was Jules husband and was really excited for that relationship and we only met Jackson a few times, I felt gutted by his death. I know there is so much more story to tell with everyone's lives and I absolutely can't wait to read everything you have to share!

Thank you! Getting better is absolutely the ultimate goal. I always want to be better than my last story and Tempest feels like a big step forward to me. I’m glad it still impacted you even knowing about both Alex and Jackson. That means a ton! And there is so much story left to tell. If I stepped back and looked at it all at once, it might be daunting. lol

THANK YOU FOR THE EARLY CHAPTER!!! OMG Jules and Alex are HOT!!! They are even better than I imagined!!! Honestly I probably looked like a crazy person while reading with all the smiling and squealing i was doing. And that Amelia reveal!! I always feared that would happen. Poor Will but I'm excited to eventually see what happens there. Also super curious about the QI girl. Anyways Julex is amazing I am officially in love w/ them!!!

Thank you! Jules and Alex are... possibly the steamiest stuff I’ve written yet. They smolder. Their sex scenes are insane. And when @dust2dust34 edits them they’re a million times better. She’s gotten through two so far and it’s absolutely bonkers how hot they are oh my god. With Amelia... yeah... so there’ll be more on that later. Also about Will because I’m dying to write about him and ‘the girl from QI’ so much oh my god. It’s gonna be a great scene. SHIP JULEX! Definitely ship Julex. Julex is OTP. <3

#FiCoN #Tempest Spoiler #ask away #anon response #Tempest #jules queen #DAMN IT AMELIA #will queen #jackson salvati #ellie queen #sara diggle #Elara #ameliam #amelia prescott #Alex Castillo #julex #julson

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