#fate was so so so cruel to Merlin
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There’s just something about how by the end for Arthur to play the role he needed to play , be the once and future king who would unite Albion and rule justly, he had to learn to be gentle to be softer and kinder and more compassionate .
And he had to learn it from Merlin . The person who in order to become Arthur’s protector had to learn to be Ruthless . He had to be cold blooded , merciless and vicious to keep Arthur safe .
#idk if fate intended this for Merlin#or if Merlin willingly chose so#because he always had that feral desperate kind of fierce protectiveness towards the things he loves#either way#i wanna cry#i’m in my FEELS#you don’t understand the irony#ig the two sides of the same coin always have to balanced#i just#fate was so so so cruel to Merlin#I’m crying#i feel like this needs to be a post of minimum 15 paragraphs when it’s my turn with the braincell#bbc merlin#merlin#arthur pendragon#merthur#screaming into the tumblr void#random thoughts#rewatching merlin
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A request for you!
Is just Remus helpin a newly werewolf infected reader learn how to deal with it (either back in school or as adults) and they have some heart eyes for each other (or are already together with some added anst that Remus feels responsible because she got targeted because of him or he infected her)
Go wild uwu
N/A This is perfection, kinda went the Angsty route, and by now, you know my pureblood obsession. This has become so much more then it originally planned to be LOL - Not proof read
Think like a Lupin
Iris The Goo Goo Dolls
Remus Lupin x Werewolf!Slytherin!Reader
Wc- 11536
Cw; Use of Y/N Sexual themes and actions, Cussing, themes of ptsd aligning with assault, arranged marriages, abusers doing abusing, continuity issues (mostly wolfbane during Remus's school years)
You always used to enjoy your walks. The one time you were allowed peace, away from your rancid family and their overbearing presence.
They were always simple, slow, and just a lap around your parents' garden. The {L/N} manor was huge, and the property was far bigger. The trail, however, was just around the fountained hedges and back. It was the only path you were allowed to walk without a chaperone, so you relished in it.
It was just around the garden.
It was safe.
It should have been safe.
It was foggy, cold, your limbs buzzing numb and your lips chapped. Your father had just came back from his week-long ministry endeavor, working to ban those infected with Lycanthropy from the more popularized highlands. He had no shame in his views on them, and for the longest time, you believed them too..
You had a lot of regrets like that.
Your father was furious, his bill wasn't passed and he, as usual, had taken it out on your mother the second he entered the threshold of the place you called home. The verbal attack that started was horrendous and you wanted no part in it. So here you were, as far away from home as you could get.
You wanted to walk for hours, but the trail was only about long enough to allow you to avoid your fathers fury, that was pushing it.
Once you were behind the hedges, and you knew no one was watching, you sat down. Looking up at the full moon you lifted your hand as if you could catch it.
You didn't feel the eyes on you.
You don't hear the rustling on the outer line of the property.
Maybe if you did, it would have been different. Maybe if you didn't go out alone, it would have been different.
Maybe if you didn't go out alone, the imprint of Greyback’s jaws wouldn't be permanently etched into your skin.
~~~
Being a pureblood had never been necessarily difficult when you were younger. Occasionally you weren't allowed to play certain games or be around certain people, but it remained plausible. As you got older, specifically when you got to Hogwarts, you suddenly had weekly letters informing you of their expectations. It was crushing, from your parents expecting updates from the professors, to them giving you a letter with a list of all of the approved students your parents allowed you to associate with. Merlin forbid you make friends with muggleborns and halfbloods. Living with that for six full years was destroying you.
You preferred that, however, when you heard news that after your seventh year you were to be married off. Your parents didn't even permit you to know who it was.
Being left with your thoughts was favorable, knowing once the year was over, you were to be married off and a child wasn't an option, more of an obligation. The idea of bringing a child into a world so cruel, to face the same fates, with the possibility of your inflection? It was keeping you up, despite how you tried to keep the thoughts away.
You were laying in the cott, as Madam Pomfrey tried to quiz you on how all of this happened. She didn't say it, but she had this horrible feeling that it was a certain boy she knew, and the guilt he would feel if he heard of it would destroy him.
You didn't answer, just kept denying it. The scars along your face and chest throbbed, your very skull ached from your first ever transformation. Your parents had made you promise to keep it quiet, not wanting to disgrace their name and ruin your betrothal. No one was to know, especially staff, so you kept your mouth shut. Pomfrey tutted and shook her head before she stood. Giving a startled breath when the doors crashed open.
Your eyes tightened in pain and you lifted your good hand over your eyes to try and drown out the raising sunlight.
You groaned and looked up at the doorway. You saw four boys, boys you unfortunately knew very well. The Marauders. If it was to be anyone coming into the hospital wing with no explanation, at this ungodly time of the morning, it would be them. You didn't notice Madam Pomfrey’s familiar and routine movements as she left your side and hurried the boys into the cott next to yours.
You closed your eyes and let out a low sigh as you tried to ignore them. Luckily, the tallest one, Remus, seemed just as over it as you by the way his friends hushed around him.
“I'm fine, guys, you can head off, it will be breakfast soon.”
Remus’s voice sounded strained. Not that you paid particular attention to it before now, you could even hear a bit of crackle in the base of it, clearly over used. You slowly peaked one of your eyes open and spotted Remus’s form sprawled out on the bed just a yard or two away from you. You wondered if she did it on purpose.
Now, your ideals didn't align with your parents, you had long since grown out of that phase. But that didn't mean you still didn't put up a front to anyone you weren't close to. The Marauders and you didn't really care to involve yourself with each other, the only one you knew vaguely was Sirius, but that was due to your relationship with Regulus. Both of them were dramatic shouts, but Regulus was at least charming about it. You couldn't say you knew Sirius well enough to know it.
Not that it mattered.
His name was nowhere on your parents list.
“Are you sure, moony? We can get you anything you need.” James fretted like the mother hen he was. You rolled your eyes and began to roll over, giving a low hiss of pain as the bandage that littered your skin rubbed against your raw flesh.
It was then that the boys noticed you. Your back was now to them, and it seemed they took that as a sign to go. You heard the three shuffling away with low whispers of something you couldn't quite catch.
You tried to steady your breathing, as your ears narrowed in on Remus’s breath. Ever since that night, while you were still in denial, you noticed how your eyesight increased tenfold, your hearing was beyond sensitive, and Merlin your nose seemed to find new and powerful scents everywhere. Taking long deep breaths through your nose wasn't helping.
That was, until you smelt something strong. It wasn't a smell you were able to place, but it was amazing. Calming and numbing, like you could fully unwind and let yourself take the backseat because something was here to protect you. Something was there to stand guard, you didn't have to anymore. You tried to hush this utterly annoying whining in your ears, telling you to go closer to the source, like there were claws wracking against your temple.
You curled up within yourself, holding your head, trying to block out every sound and smell, it was overwhelming. Your body ached, your head throbbed, your nose felt cold and raw with every breath. You wanted to forget tonight, figure out a glamour to cover up your damned scars, and go back to class. But that could all be done tomorrow. Now, you just wanted to sleep.
“Is it loud?” Remus called over to you in a low tone. Still, you flinched at the unwelcome and piercing intrusion it caused. Remus’s voice traveled down your spine and warmed your stomach. Whatever this was, you needed it to stop. You don't even notice the hesitance and slight pain in his voice.
“What?” You whispered back with narrowed eyes.
“The voice.” He challenged. Remus Lupin was smarter than most, not that it took too much thought to figure out what was happening. You looked a lot like him, when he was first nursed back to health by Pomfrey.
“I don't have a clue what you mean.” You snapped back before you carefully rolled over to look at him. You hid your wince and grimace perfectly, but you couldn't hold an angry expression with Remus. Especially when his eyes locked with yours. The voice got so much louder, demanding and begging she go to the boy infront of her. You did your best to ignore it, flinching hard, and covering your temple with a huff.
You don't get a chance to notice how Remus seemed to be going through the same. The second he walked through the door, your scent hit his nose and he knew. He knew what you were before he realized who you were. {Y/N} {L/N}. To him, the only thing notable about you outside of your pureblood bordering on royal status was the company you kept.
You were one of the many who couldn't stand Severus, but you hung around Regulus Black, Evan Rosier, and even Barty Crouch Jr. you seemed to only be friendly with purebloods, but you never went out of your way to pick on anyone else. It was like you lived in your own little world, as far away from ‘tainted blood’ as possible. He only remembered you as the girl who hexed Avery for calling Lily a Mudblood, then receiving a howler from your parents about it the very next day. You avoided anyone who wasn't a pureblood since.
The only exchange he had ever had with you was when Barty had cornered a few first years in the hall, Gryffindors with a loud mouth, having called out Regulus for Slytherin cheating during the game.
The marauders just so happened to be walking down the hall at the time, and before they could do anything about it, you walked in from the courtyard to the scene. It was almost scary, how you simply calling the boys names retracted them from whatever they planned to do. Well, Barty planned to do, Regulus held his usual look of indifference and likely didn't seem too interested in any outcome.
“Then, what are you in for?” Remus prodded with an amused look. You huffed as his voice became more soothing the more he spoke. You wanted to ignore him, you knew you should. That voice in your head did not like that idea, it seemed. Desperate for any bit of attention Remus would give you, and he seemed willing to hold a conversation. It latched onto that.
“I'm.. sick.” Okay, maybe you weren't a genius, but you certainly weren't that dumb. That damned voice speaking louder then any thought in your head.
“You're .. sick?” He prodded with a smirk and you bit your cheek.
“Uh huh.” Might as well stick to it.
There was a long pause between you two, you eventually gave a low groan and he smiled. “Well, I usually wouldn't suggest this for just sick girls.” He started and you peaked one of your eyes to glance at him. He was sitting up, back propped up by pillows. The second your eyes met your lungs suddenly refused to work properly, and he seemed to stutter for a moment.
“What?” You whispered.
“Calming drought. And a few drops of deflating drought. I take it before I get,” He gestured to his bandages, much less then yours. “Sick too.”
Your eyes widened at his remark. Eyes trailing down his form a bit, not noticing how it made him squirm. Your jaw went slack for a moment before you corrected yourself. He was a werewolf too? Who else knew? They allowed him at school? Regretting your own stupid excuse now. But you listened to his every word intently. You bit your bottom lip and slowly sighed. “Ah. Well, a little over kill isn't it?”
“Is it?” He chuckled and gestured to your current state. “I also do something to relieve stress, you know, before I get sick.”
You quirked your eyebrow at him and hummed. “Relieve stress?”
“Mhm.. I can give some suggestions, I can help you too, if you need.”
“You forget yourself, Lupin.”
Remus seemed baffled by your response before his jaw went slack. “W-woah, not like that.” He laughed and you couldn't help but smile at it. The crinkle of his tanned skin in the corner of his eyes made your heart throb helplessly against your ribcage. What had gotten into you?
“That's a real shame.” You continued to tease and Remus seemed thrown for a loop, before he quickly caught himself.
“Sorry, princess, I usually like at least one date before I go to such extremes.”
“How very proper of you, I wouldn't of expected it, considering the company you keep.” You smirked and he rolled his eyes playfully.
“I could say the same to you.” He tried to joke, but that remark made you pucker your lips a bit.
“Not exactly my choice.” You mumbled and he slowly frowned. The wolf in him whining helplessly as he seemed to upset you. He used to have it under control, but it seemed the company of other werewolves was weakening his resolve and strengthening Moony’s.
A silence followed, but it wasn't uncomfortable. He actually hadn't felt more at peace in months. You either.
“Wolfsbane.” He remarked and you looked up at him.
“What?” You whispered and he smiled at you.
“Wolfsbane. It's a potion to help with our sickness.” He muttered and you clicked your tongue.
“Have you ever used it?”
“Can't afford it.” He remarked quickly and you took a breath in, sharp. Forgetting to be conscious of your privilege.
“Ah… what does it do?” You asked carefully, and the conversation continued like that.
Your conversation faded into nothing but familiarities after a while, from your shared sickness to random facts. Almost like you were old friends catching up with each other, you learned of his parents, his friends, his childhood. It was simple and you were practically strangers, but by the time you had dozed off it felt like you understood a bit more about who Remus Lupin was.
You didn't share much about yourself, you hoped it didn't show just how desperate you were for his voice. You didn't even have time to think of blood status, how your parents would react to you making a friend of a halfblood.
It felt like you had an ally, someone you could lean on. It helped that his presence alone seemed to sooth the manic thoughts in your head.
~~~
It had been days since your encounter with him. You couldn't seem to get that stupid boy out of your head. So what was a good distraction when you couldn't get your thoughts straight? Studying, of course. The only reason you found yourself ducking into the library was Barty wouldn't be caught dead studying, less people think his brains were more than just a Merlin given gift. You found yourself smiling slightly at his utter ridiculous reasonings. Regulus could keep him entertained while you were away, you were sure of it.
You had to be careful with the two, Evan was easy to fool, too focused on trying to be on par with Barty, or too focused on making a name for himself, but the others? You didn't want them to narrow down what was happening to you. You didn't exactly know how they would handle it. Regulus was still young enough his mothers words meant the world to him, and Barty and Evan had expressed interest in more extremes then just arrogance. You chose to ignore those thoughts, because you loved the boys, no matter how foolish they were. You didn't claim to be the bastion of temperance. You didn't have all the answers for them, you certainly didn't have enough experience or evidence to the contrary, you just knew you cared deeply for them, and abandoning them for ideals imposed upon them was never an option in your book.
Walking into the library, the scent hit your nose like a ton of bricks. That familiar and soothing smell. It was intoxicating, having to catch yourself as your body moved closer without your consent. Your eyes locked with his almost instantly, as if he was looking for you too.
Remus Lupin was with his usual friends, though you noted Lily and Mary were with them as well. It wasn't anything big, as you knew Lily had started dating James Potter after years of embarrassing pining. Though, Mary was sitting awfully close to Remus. The voice in the back of your head did not like that. All of them took a full table for themselves, and as your body had started walking towards them, you suddenly realized you had stopped in the middle of the aisle staring at Remus. And he you.
It took an awkward cough from someone at the table and that seemed to break you and Remus’s staring contest. You looked over at where the noise came from and you saw Sirius Black, giving you the dirtiest look you had ever seen. You give a ‘hmph’ and look away from them, walking right past their table to one of the smaller ones near the window.
You didn't notice how Remus’s eyes trailed after you, nor did you notice when Sirius gave him a look of confusion, looking for an explanation. Remus, however, simply looked down at his parchment and waved him off.
“What was that about?” Sirius hissed at Remus, that was hard to ignore.
“Nothing.” Remus muttered. Even though his voice was lower than Sirius’s, you heard it more clearly than anyone else’s in the room.
They continued to talk among themselves, and being just a few tables down it was hard to ignore. It was mostly about whatever they were reviewing, it seemed Sirius gave up on trying to pry out Remus’s explanation. Eventually, it went quiet. You gave a sigh of relief, body unwinding. The voice in your head seemed to quiet down a bit, being in close proximity of Remus calmed it down.
This was a bad idea.
You tried to focus on your work, you truly did, but writing a 12 inch on the migrating patterns of horned slugs was as boring as it sounded. Could you even call moving from one side of a city to another migration? Sounded like a bit too much credit. Not that you could think of that for too long, soon enough, Remus was invading your mind again. The voice was becoming less and less content with the distance between you two. You rubbed your face and sighed. You have been at this for twenty minutes and you already wanted to go back to your dorm and forget this ever happened.
There was shuffling behind you, and you prayed Remus and his friends were leaving. When you heard books hit the desk next to you, you knew Merlin had a sick sense of humor.
You turned to look at whoever had the audacity to sit next to you, and your eyes locked with Remus’s.
“Hey.” He whispered to you and that voice shot down your spine like a bolt of lightning. You turned to look at his friends and saw that all of them seemed to be staring at you two, baffled. You quickly looked away, body stiff as you looked right back down at your parchment. You ignored him for a few moments, before you finally spoke up.
“Why are you here, Lupin?” You muttered, glancing over at him and noticing with a start that he had been staring at you already.
“To calm the voice.” He whispered, maintaining a stern and serious eye contact that almost strangled you. When did Remus Lupin get so confident?
You hadn't even noticed how the voice in the back of your head stopped, until it began to send pleasant rumbles threw your entire chest, like a purring cat. Oh, you were done for.
“Y-you forget yourself.” You whispered out in a stammer and he smiled bright at you, denting his cheek with his tongue. “You have that effect on me.”
You scoffed and looked away, covering your cheeks with your wrist and tried to pretend his words didn't rattle you. Cocky little-
“You can call me Remus.” He whispered to you and you closed your eyes and began to steady your breath.
“I will do no such thing.”
“Why not?”
“Have you forgotten who you're speaking to, halfblood?” You snapped back at him, turning to face him once more and you flinched at the surprised look on his face. The voice gave you a sharp bout of pain down your neck as if to punish you for hurting him.
There was a moment of quiet, before he turned to face you fully, both of you having forgotten your audience. He hung his arm around the back of your chair and that did nothing to calm your battering ram heart, as if it was trying to tear away from your chest to Remus. “You know.” He whispered, leaning closer as if he was telling you a secret.
You could have fainted right then and there.
“I don't think you really believe that, do you?” He whispered and you snapped you out of your thoughts. His smell. Please please please, whatever cruel gods were watching stop this torture already. “If you did, you wouldn't have hexed Avery. You wouldn't have talked to me in the hospital wing. And you would have long since hexed me for coming to you.”
“I'm still debating that, Lupin.”
“Remus.”
“Lupin.”
“Moony?” He offered and you looked over at him in utter stupefaction. You narrowed your eyes before one eyebrow arched in questioning.
“Moony?” You muttered, not noticing the shiver that went down his spine at that. “Moony.” He confirmed.
“Sounds ridiculous.” You huffed and he gave a brighter smile this time.
“Sounds amazing when you say it.” He whispered and before you could shoot something back, a voice called out behind you.
“Yo, {Y/N}! The bloody hell have you been!?”
You didn't know if that voice was a gift or an additional plague from the gods above. You pressed your thumb to your cheek and sighed. Preparing yourself for another shiver of discontent from your wolf, you leaned your head back to glance at Barty, and he was smiling, not for long, when he noticed Lupin with his arm practically around you, leaning into your space. His expression hardened.
“You! Get your damn hands off her!” He shouted to the entire library. You groaned and quickly stood up, Remus’s eyes still on you, as if he could care less about the scene to come. Barty was quick to make his way across the room and began to, and rather forcibly might you add, pack up your things for you.
“Is he bothering you?” He pried and inserted himself between you two, the growl from Remus was almost missed. You quickly shook your head as he put your book bag over your shoulder.
Barty huffed at your answer and put his hand around your lower back. “Bold halfblood.” He spat at him and began to escort you out of the library. You quickly paused, looking back at Remus as a realization hit you.
“Lupin.” You called over to him, and your breath got caught up for a moment, noticing he was watching you without ever moving from his seat.
“Remus.” He whispered back to you and it felt like he whispered that right against your earlobe. You took a sharp breath.
“Remus.” You whispered back and he sat up straighter. “I-I took your advice.” You whispered out, your hands gripping your book bag harder. You didn't think about why you said that. Maybe you were looking for praise? Merlin, what was wrong with you?
He just smiled at you and toyed with his lip, wetting them. “Good.” He nodded and you took a deep breath, about to say something further before Barty quickly hooked his arm more forcibly around your waist and pulled you away from the library. This would be a long year.
~~~
Weeks later, you were laying down on your bed and rubbing your temple. The green sheets that enveloped you were hardly soothing to your throbbing head. The voice, who you learned from Remus was indeed as you suspected, the wolf, had been furious with you. Between tests and studying, and not to mention Barty’s new found protectiveness over you, you weren't able to see Remus, outside of the stolen glances in the halls.
Barty refused to let you anywhere near the Gryffindor quartet, having told Regulus and Evan's that very night when he walked you all the way back to the Slytherin common rooms. Evan's was appalled, but Regulus seemed more disgusted then anything else.
It was like they formed a schedule to keep you away from any undesirables, every day, from potions to history of magic, they escorted you from class to class, and the voice was growing very impatient with their insistence. Even Regulus involved himself with the two’s foolish plans.
You loved the boys, but you didn't know how to explain that it physically pained you to be away from him. It was bizarre, you hardly even spared him a glance through the entire school year, he was just James Potter’s friend, someone to avoid. Just another person who didn't match your parents standards and thus, you needed nothing from. Now, it was like the very idea of going back to that was blasphemous. The wolf in the back of your mind howled out in displeasure at your own thoughts. What you would give for everything to be quiet.
As if to mock you, there was a firm knock on your door. You huffed and sat up, only for the door to be thrown open and Barty to let himself in. “Got something for ya! Looks like it's from your parents.” He announced as he plopped the package down, your bed dipped under its weight, and the sound of glass clinking filling the room. You huffed and stood up, arms crossing as you glared at him.
“Has waiting for me to open the door ever once crossed your mind?”
“It did, once, it scared me.”
You scoffed and tried to hide your smile. “I could of been changing!”
“Nothing I wouldn't like to see, dear.” He purred with a wink. You reached back and grabbed a pillow, pelting it at his face and he laughed, throwing his head back.
“Out! Out of my room!” You shouted, unable to help the giggles that left your lips. Despite the joy, you felt this familiar dread fill your chest. Your voice agreed with it, you didn't want to be alone with anyone. Not right now.
“And if I don't?” He smirked and held the pillow still. You bit your cheek, another horrible attempt to hide your laughter. Trying your best to ignore how a toad made its home in the back of your throat. You felt like you could cry, you didn't know why, Barty had never once made you feel unsafe, and despite his jokes, he respected you more then you figured to be normal considering how purebloods usually were. He was definitely your favorite RavenClaw.
“I'm calling your boyfriend.” You teased and he gave a dramatic gasp, his smile twitching a bit as he noticed your eyes growing glossy.
“Oh no, whatever will I do? It's not like he agrees with me or anything.” He attempted to continue the joke, but when tears actually began to shed, he stopped fighting, letting you shove him to the door. That comment alone seemed to effect you more then you let on. He paused, about to ask you something, before you groaned, managing to get him out the door.
“Begone!” You shouted and slammed the door in front of his face.
“Hey- Wait-” He called from the other side of the closed door, you could just barely make out Regulus call for Barty to leave you be from the common room.
You pressed your back to the door and tried to calm your breathing. Closing your eyes tight to dispel your tears and gather yourself. Breathing becoming heavier, and slowly sinking against the floor. What was happening? Why were you so panicked? Your wolf paced in the back of your mind, making your breathing harder to steady. You gave a gasp and curled up tighter. Your hands were shaking, your throat was scratchy, and you were sure you would pass out if your hiccups paired with the heavy gasps had anything to say about it.
You wanted to sleep, you wanted it to stop, but you had a feeling you knew exactly how to calm yourself.
~~~ Remus’s POV ~~~
It was like they were brandishing you like a trophy of some kind. He didn't want to think about it like that, like you were just some prize to be won, but it was getting harder. The looks Barty and Evan would shoot him in the halls while keeping you as far away from him as possible.
He was dying here, Moony wouldn't just shut up about you, and the boys kept harassing him about you too. Still not over the interaction he had in the library. It got worse when he admitted you were the one who laid next to him in the hospital wing.
“I mean, she's a pureblood, she acts like everyone else doesn't exist, you think she'd give Remus the time of day?” Sirius spoke up, ever the skeptic. He was laying on his back on the floor of the common room, tossing a pair of folded socks above his head. “{L/N}s would eat our poor moony alive.” Sirius smirked and tossed the sock pair at Remus who lifted his hand sharply and caught it without looking.
The taller boy was laying on the couch, sprawled out to try and ease the tension in every limb of his.
Sirius let out a low, impressed whistle. They had also found his new wound up Moony’s reflexes fascinating. Sirius especially.
“Have you seen the way they look at eachother? Like star crossed lovers.” James sighed fondly from where he sat in front of the loveseat, head resting in Lilys lap as she braided bits of his hair. Lily gave a fond eye roll, looking over to Remus.
“Starcross what now? Honestly, Remus, if you're shagging her you can just say that.” Sirius snickered but quickly his chuckle was caught in his throat when Remus sent him a deadly glare.
Sirius bit his cheek and slowly smirked. Interesting.
“He really does seem fond of her. Infatuation, maybe?” She teased and Remus groaned. “I am right here.” He grumbled and glared over, Lily giggled.
She was the only one he told about what had been happening, so she was surely just taunting him. He rolled his jaw and opened his mouth to speak before there was a soft knock on the portrait. The fat lady’s voice soon came, gasping and scolding whoever was trying to get in.
“Woah, after curfew?” James muttered, looking to Lily. “As heads, we should probably do some scolding, hm?” He prodded and Lily gave a dramatic hum of thought, pressing her finger to her cheek. “Hmmm…”
She glanced up at Remus and saw how his body stiffened and he sat up a bit. He was staring at the door like a patient and loyal dog. Her eyebrows raised in amusement before she shook her head.
“Nope.” She popped the ‘p.’ “We're off.” She cheeked and James gave a chuckle and leaned his head back against her plush thighs with a content hum.
“Sounds good.”
There was another, much less confident knock.
No one moved, Peter looked around the group from his homework before he groaned as all the eyes landed on him, safe for Remus. He stood up and walked over to it. He was gone for a few moments, before he walked back with an amused look, Remus was already getting up.
“Remus your…” Peter trailed off as he watched the taller boy quickly walk past him and out of view of his friends. Lily smirked and James tilted his head curiously at her.
“Remus is getting callers, soon enough, we'll have to set up a dowry.” She hummed in a serious tone, Sirius throwing his hands up.
“What? I always have callers! What's my dowry?”
“We have three chocolate frogs for whoever will settle down with you.” James remarked and Lily gave a startled laugh, covering her smile as James looked up at her like she was the one to gift him sight.
Sirius pouted.
~~~
You knocked, just once more. You didn't know why you expected them to be up, but the wolf in the back of your head was calming slowly, you had a feeling you knew why. When the door opened, the warm air seemed to pour from the common room, the very air wrapped around you in so much comfort. The smell came with it, and you could have fainted with how loud the voice became. Your hands found purchase on your skirt when you made eye contact with Peter Pettigrew. You both stared at each other bewildered. Right. It wasn't just Remus here.
Awkwardly, you cleared your throat and lifted the small paper bag in your hand, “I uhm,” You cleared your throat again. “Remus. Something for Remus.”
Peter slowly smirked before he nodded and hurried back into the room. You looked away and began debating with yourself. If you ran back to the dungeons, would he catch you before you got there? Your hands were still unsteady but your breath was finally growing even. What were you even planning? Give him the Wolfsbane and beg him to stay with you a little longer? Because him standing near you was calming? Merlin you should've thought this through. You sounded insane.
Your head snapped up when you heard the portrait open again. You locked eyes with Remus, both a bit too stunned to know what to say. You opened your mouth a few times and began to grow frustrated with yourself as you continued to try, and no sound left. You took an even breath and Remus gave you a small breathtaking smile. This bastard.
“A-actually, this was a mistake, I'll-” Your words were cut short when Remus reached out and grabbed your arm to keep you in place. His hand was much larger than you expected. You turned back to look at him and when your eyes met, your breath was once again snatched from your chest. You let out a whine that was so audible it was humiliating. “R-Remus…” You whispered out his name and that seemed to really ignite something in him.
He tugged softly at your arm to gesture you in. You toyed with your bottom lip before you obeyed him and followed. He lead you into the common room, and you met his friends look of utter bewilderment, and they matched your expression.
Remus ignored them, leading you right up the stairs to his dorm. You heard a wolf whistle from Sirius before the door closed behind you.
Everything else happened so quickly, but so carefully. He backed you into the door and you stammered out his name. You couldn't think clearly, with how intense your wolf was becoming. Like it was whimpering in excitement. You huffed as Remus gave you a look that sent danger signed flaring in every part of your body but your mind.
Your left brain was utterly useless around him, you decided.
He caged you in, and leaned his nose against your neck and took in a deep breath, savoring the smell of your shampoo and body wash. He seemed just as dazed as you did. You pressed your legs together, hard, and you squinted at the light above you, allowing him to take you in.
After what felt like hours, he pulled away. You felt so cold, you resisted the urge to pull him back. He leaned down over you, face just a few inches from yours.
His eyes glanced down at the paper bag in your hand and your mouth dried. “Got something, Princess?”
You closed your eyes tight and lifted the bag. He looked between you and it, not that you noticed. “For you.”
“For me?” He asked in a soft teasing voice. Taking it from your palm and opening the bag. His breath caught in his throat and he snatched it out, holding the blue grey sludge like potion in his hand. “Is.. is this?”
“I-I listened. Like I said, and my parents sent me far more then I would ever use in a school year so.. so I figured it would be a waste.” Your voice grew lower as he gave you a look you couldn't describe. Would you be honest? That you lied to your parents to request double knowing they wouldn't question it? To offer Remus just a bit of relief? Even if it wasn't much? You doubted it. But the way he was looking at you now, it felt like he knew. He set the bag down and stepped closer to you.
You reached for the door knob but he beat you to it. Leaning down as his lips hovered over yours, you held your breath, your fingers trembling. Slowly, moving to rest on his chest. He smiled, it was so small, so soft. You took a shaky breath and slid your hands from his chest to his shoulders. “Can I?” He whispered and you let out another ungodly sound.
“Yes.”
When his lips landed on yours, everything else went blank. You reached around him and gripped at the back of his uniform with desperate clawing motions. It was flashes filling your head. Flashes of Remus against your neck, then you on his bed.
You had no clue what was happening you just knew you'd didn't want it to stop. Ever. When he shifted on top of you, however, you noticed his hesitance.
You were both red, deep with rushing blood. His hands that were once around your waist were now to your wrists. He straddled your hips, but he didn't move beyond that. When did he take his shirt off? When did yours go?
It seemed to hit Remus, how foggy you truly were. He slowed down and let go of you. Carefully,he crawled off and sat down in front of you with a low groan. You slowly and carefully sat up. It was hard, with how little your core seemed to obey you. “R-Remus?” You muttered and he covered his face with his hands.
“This is a bad idea.” He mumbled and you pouted a bit.
“What?”
“You can't think straight. Neither can I.” He whispered. “I won't regret this. But I know you will.”
You paused for a moment and considered what he said. He was right. If he had continued, you surely would have gone far further then you were willing. You didn't know how many people would of been able to make that call.
You fall on your side on his bed and groaned. It smelt so much like him. Your eyes closed and you buried your face in the pillow. He slowly smirked.
Climbing up onto the bed and wrapping his arm around your middle. You leaned your body fully against his and he sighed. “Is this okay?” He whispered, nose to your neck and voice desperate. You nodded, rolling over to hide your face in his chest. Everything was calm again, for both of you. No voices. No howling or clawing, no thoughts of anyone but who was in front of you. He waved his wand and closed the canopy drapes for privacy.
You knew you'd feel safe with him.
~~~
You woke up feeling amazing. Too bad the other three were there to greet you two with teasing and vile innuendos you had never heard before. And you were friends with Barty Crouch. You couldn't deny how funny it was, so when Remus apologized you could only laugh.
You and Remus made a habit of it, meeting up together and finding comfort in the calm you brought each other. Only on weekends, as you weren't allowed to go to Hogsmeade on most occasions, so the boys didn't question you when you said you would be keeping yourself busy.
Busy you definitely kept, when they left in the mornings, you made your way to the empty Gryffindor common room, straight to Remus’s room. Thats were you were now. Laying in his bed and fiddling with his hair. He was laying between your bent knees and nuzzling his head into your stomach. You flinched a bit as he rubbed against the mostly healed bite mark. He lifted his head and gave you a concerned look. You bit your cheek and slowly lifted your shirt, showing off the large bit of mangled skin to him again. He had seen it before, several times by now. Usually due to him throwing a shirt of his at you the second you walked threw the door. It was kind of adorable.
His eyes fully took it in, running his thumb against your jagged and twisted skin, clearly confused. His wound healed when he was young, yours seemed to be getting worse. “My mother healed it the best she could.” You whispered and his face twisted in confusion, eyes meeting yours. You bit your cheek.
“My parents didn't want anyone to know so.. that meant no St Mongos.” You whispered and he seemed surprised, like a deer in headlights. You gave a reassuring smile.
“It's alright, pretty boy.” You cooed and ran your fingers threw his hair and tugged softly at the roots. He gave a low sigh and closed his eyes.
“There are rules for that, to keep the doctors quiet, you know.” He whispered and you slowly nodded, biting your bottom lip. He peaked one of his eyes open and tugged your lip from between your teeth. “I know.. my parents are pretty paranoid.” You mumbled.
He nodded and slowly got up to his knees, running his free hand along the scar, rolling you over onto your stomach, you obeyed easily. He leaned down and kissed the bottom half of the scar, making you smile into the pillow you were hugging. “Do you…” His voice trailed off and you hid a bit into your pillow. He frowned and crawled up further to kiss the back of your neck. As if to tell you he was there. You were safe. No one would hurt you while he was here.
“... My father was at the ministry. He uhm..” You felt pathetic, like what happened was something you deserved. You one agreed with your father, so what did that make you? You were just as bad as his mindless arrogance.
“He was voting on the bill, and donated a hefty share to get.. people like us banned from the highlands.” You whispered and you felt as his lips stilled against your lower neck. Before the kiss slowly deepened, almost bruising. “I-I guess there were people there that didn't like that. Fenrir Greyback followed my dad back home and- I guess it just so happened to be a full moon-”
Your words were getting caught in your throat. Suddenly it felt like you were being strangled. You quickly sat up and he moved off of you quickly. You turned to face him and gave him a sigh of relief. “S-sorry I- I couldn't see you, I just-”
“Shhh..” Remus tried to calm you. Leaning forward and rubbing your back carefully as he offers you his hand. You grabbed it and used it to yank him against you. You missed the security of being under him. He pressed his nose to your shoulder and you sniffled slightly.
That night was the closest you felt to Remus. It was a shock to learn his father also earned Greyback’s wrath, in much the same way.
You didn't want to leave the dorms that night, so, for the second time, you found yourself tangled up with Remus in a much more affectionate way, less intimate and more careful. That's not to say that his lazy open mouthed kisses against your skin were anything but love. And his deep thumb prints against your abdomen where he focused the frustration from your slow and careful kisses were anything but lust.
You both agreed not to label what you had. It was clear that most of what it was came from the shared experiences, the shared inflection, and of course, the terribly desperate wolves that would rather kill you both then be without the other.
It was getting harder, however. As the months went on, how you both would focus on each other after every full moon, how being tangled with each other was more gratifying than any prank Remus could ever pull, leaving his boys behind most nights, how you both couldn't seem to get enough of each other.
When Remus became a prefect, your meetings went from every weekend to every other night. You were falling for eachother, hard. You were sure you wouldn't recover from this, but instead of breaking your heart early, you simply caved to his every desire. Every question, every look, every touch was reciprocated. In turn, he caved to his obsession. Letting you consume what little sanity he had left.
Your friends noticed the change, the marks on your nape and throat, the bruised lips, the skipping breakfast and even dinner at times.
His friends noticed it too, Sirius seemed all for the idea of 'tainting a pureblood’ and James seemed happy Remus seemed to be love struck. He had spent all of his years at Hogwarts refusing love, but it seemed he fell into this one so fully and so helplessly, he had forgotten who you were.
You did too.
When summer finally came. It was like they were strangers again. You didn't even spare him a glance. Remus was desperate, it was like he was going mad without you. He knew you had called it off. He knew why you did too. He felt cheated, the one time he lets himself fall so fully and she belongs to someone else. You two had talked, you told him the last thing you needed was your parents finding out about you two. That after the last night, there was no ‘us,’ that you two never happened.
Remus was devastated, but kept it to himself. He knew by the look in your eyes that this wasn't the outcome you had hoped for. You both got too distracted with each other, with the fantasy of it all. You two never labeled what you had, so there was nothing to fight for. He wondered if you did that on purpose.
The next day after your conversation was the last night you snuck off to his dorm. It was mostly you watching him pack, the way his mother had taught him. He was telling you stories of his mother, how strong and resilient she was. How she taught him even the most mundane tasks were best done slowly. He said it in a tone that made you wonder, what exactly he could mean.
When he was finally done he crawled into bed with you. Once again, you fell asleep in eachothers arms. It was peaceful and content. It brought a smile to your face, trying to ignore the biting pain of knowing this was the last you'd have of Remus Lupin. A strange lecture and a night together.
He had changed so much of who you were, he had taught you so much more than you would've ever known alone. You were grateful life gave you him, even if it was just for a moment.
The morning would come too soon.
~~~
You loaded your things on the train, with no true attachments to anyone you were allowed to see, it was easy to just leave.
That's what you told yourself, anyway. When you sat down, next to Barty and across from Regulus, you fiddled with your book instead of reading it. Tears gathered in your eyes as Evan and Barty continued to debate who you had been seeing the past few months.
Regulus seemed not to be entertaining the conversation, focusing more on you as you sniffled. Quickly, you dismissed yourself to the bathroom. Leaving the compartment and ignoring their calls to you. Hurrying past students you didn't know with their varying looks of confusion and concern. You didn't even have time to think before your arm was grabbed.
Looking back and up you saw Remus. He was guiding you to a storage closet, you both said nothing.
He pulled you in and closed the door, and you came undone in his arms. You had kept strong about the separation, but it was tearing you apart inside. Remus had taught you to tame the voice in your head, so you knew now your reckless emotions were your own. You clung to him and sobbed, he held you close and you heard his own sniffles into your shoulder.
You were there for a while, eventually, he used his thumbs to dry your eyes, you looked at him and saw such terrifying love in his eyes. You bit your cheek and shook your head. It wasn't just love. It was desperation. Like he was begging you for an answer you surely couldn't give. You pulled away and his head hung down in defeat. You stared at him. Say it. You thought. Say it and I'm yours, Remus.
You both sat in silence for another minute or two before you sighed. Turning to open the door, still no words passed between you both.
As you walked out, your head down, you were greeted with a pair of polished black shoes. Your eyes slowly trailed up to meet the eyes of a shocked Regulus Black. His jaw tensed when he saw who was behind you. You hadn't known he followed you. Fuck.
“Regulus, it's-”
“Blood traitor.” He spat the vile insult and you felt like he slapped you. Your breath hitched and you reached forward towards him. He was young, he didn't understand. You knew the only experience he had with this was his cousin and brother both of whom, he confided in you, he felt abandoned him. You didn't know how to explain what had happened. You didn't know what to tell him. You don't know what to say. Your entire body was lit up like a live wire, and Remus spoke in a low tone.
“What was that?” He prickled and you quickly shushed him. Remus seemed startled but didn't say anything. Scoffing as Regulus marched off with another much lower repetition of the insult. You sighed and covered your eyes, feeling even more miserable now.
Remus reached out to you, wanting to comfort you again. Anything to keep you close to him. “I knew this was a bad idea.” You gave a heart broken whisper and Remus froze up, staring at you with wide eyes.
He didn't say a word as he walked to your side, moving some of your hair to behind your ear. Muttering a soft goodbye, one he figured would be his last, before he turned and walked away. Back to his compartment. He didn't want to cause any more damage.
You made it back to your compartment, Barty and Evan greeted you with concern and you waved it off. Your eyes on Regulus who was glaring at you. Luckily, the boys were distracted with their hundredth conversation of the night.
You turned to look down at your book once more. It was one Remus had given you, just to borrow, you wondered if he thought it would be an excuse. To see eachother again.
~~~
A week of being home, you were finally slipping back into routine. The first thing you knew you wanted to do was return Remus’s book. Once you did, he had lettered you back almost immediately. You knew you shouldn't, but it was hard when every part of your heart ached just to read his words. You exchanged letters with him several times over the week. With nothing else to do but write and wait for your betrothal announcement, there were days when three letters between you two simply wasn't enough.
Eventually, over the weekend, you convinced your mother to allow you to go to Hogsmeade. One hour of freedom to finally explore before your marriage, to your surprise, she agreed. You had finally gained ownership over your own vault so she allowed you to roam as long as you returned within the hour.
You did not go to Hogsmeade. You met with Remus, outside the Potters. You knew it was risky, there was a war brooding and you shouldn't be caught dead entertaining him, but you were weak. You would always be weak to him. It was just an hour, the worst mistake you had ever made. It just reinforced what you already knew. You and Remus were dangerous together. You found yourself not caring about who may have been watching. It was just a conversation and a few stray touches, but it ruined you.
Once you made it home, you watched the house elves scatter around, avoiding you. Your parents had sent you up to your room the moment you walked through the doors. They were in the living room with the Blacks, specifically Walburga and Orion.
You hadn't seen your father so furious before. Once you heard the door open, you watched through your window as the two devilish figures apparated away. You turned to your door as it slammed open. You straightened your back and avoided his eyes. “Father-”
“ ‘In the safety of our nights, I reveled in your presence. Knowing another werewolf was near brought a comforting embrace. And in your exquisite beauty, I found my heart forever captivated. You are captivating.’ “ He announced to the room and your blood ran cold. Your eyes snapped over to the drawer of your desk and realized it was open. Remus’s letters.
You looked to him and saw your mother avoiding your gaze, holding the small stack of parchment and your heart sunk to the floor.
“Father-”
“Where were you?” He demanded and you took a sharp startled breath.
“Hogsmeade, I asked mother-”
Before you could finish, he snapped his fingers and the parchment in his hand was lit ablaze. Ashes gathered at his feet and you couldn't help but let out a yelp. Covering your mouth and clenching your chest, watching as the last of Remus was burned in front of you.
“ ‘Each moment apart feels more arduous than I ever imagined. Could there be a chance, however slight, for our paths to intertwine once more?’ “ Your father spat Remus’s words back to your face and you flinched. “Where were you?” He demanded again.
“I-I went to the Potters. I went to the Potters to meet with Remus Lupin.” You sobbed out and your father gave a condescending laugh.
“You've involved yourself in filth. Do you understand that?!” He snapped at you, snatching the letters from your mother with so much force some of them flew around the room. “You have been a plight on this family since you were born! I should have sooner raised a son! I was this close to being rid of you, now the Blacks won't even take you for their disgrace of a fallen heir!”
You closed your eyes tight, bowing your head as your mother spoke up. “Where did we go wrong? You were such an obedient girl when you were younger! You used to be such a good girl, {Y/N}.”
“Don't lie to her! I will fix this. I will fix this problem. You want to entangle yourself with filth? I'll show you filth!” Your father boomed. With a wave of his hands every letter ignited. Shriveling them up to nothing but black spots on the carpet. You slowly fell to the floor and hugged yourself. Sobbing out in desperation, you wanted to go back. You wanted everything to stop throbbing and the pain to go away.
You wanted Remus.
~~~ Remus POV ~~~
Two months. Two months and none of his desperate letters got any reply. He wasn't ready for that hour to be his last goodbye. He wasn't ready to be without you yet. He wasn't ready to lose you.
He thought if he kept pushing it, kept going past the boundaries you set for yourself, you would eventually say you wanted him too. You wanted to be his and he wanted to be yours. Why was that so hard?
He spent those months moping around in his room. Bless Sirius’s soul for all he put up with. Remus would only get up to write, Sirius had to force the rest out of him. The black haired boy finally managed to drag Remus into the shower, then into the living room. Forcing him to spend time with them.
“There is a war waging! Stop worrying about that girl and drink for tonight at least.” Sirius shoved a wine glass in his hand and laughed as Remus curled up his nose in disgust. Lily walked over and pulled Remus over to the table, ready to play one of the many random muggle games she brought. Remus felt like he was going through the motions for the most part. Just doing as he was told.
There was a tap on the window, Remus ignored it. Long since learning his lesson about getting his hopes up. He focused on the cards in front of them as Lily dealt them. She had a sneaky hand, notorious for slipping them in her sleeve. His thoughts were only interrupted as Sirius muttered his name. Low and cautious.
He looked behind him and stared at Sirius who was holding up a parchment of paper, he recognized it instantly. {L/N}’s. It wasn't any normal letter. It was more of a card. “What is it?” Remus whispered, dread filling him. He knew what it was. He already knew what it was, but there was this small bit of hope that he was wrong.
Sirius looked to James who was reading it over his shoulder with a grimace. “Uh… are you sure you wanna know?” James asked cautiously, and Sirius winced.
Eventually Remus stood up and snatched the paper from them. His eyes widened and his heart stopped, slowly muttering the words to himself before Lily cautiously stood up. “What is it?”
“I don't think-” James began, and Sirius watched as Remus read it out, interrupting James.
“We, the noble and long standing house of {L/N} cordially invite you to the engagement party of..” Remus felt his words stop in his throat and Lily looked to James for an answer, he began to stutter out and over himself, before Sirius spoke up this time.
“{Y/N} {L/N} and Fenrir Greyback.” Sirius whispered and Remus crumbled the letter in his hand. No. This wasn't happening. Remus threw the invitation away and began to pace the living room, hands tangling in his hair as he clung to what little sanity he had left.
“Okay, well, let's figure this out.” James declared and Remus stopped his pacing and looked over at James with bewildered eyes.
“What?”
“Let's go crash a wedding. Well, a wedding party.” James mused and gestured to the four of them. “When is it?”
“It's tonight. Must of sent the invitation to me as a fuck you.” Remus muttered before he looked across his friends faces, slowly smiling. “You'll do this for me?” He asked softly and Sirius walked up to him, patting his shoulder. “Remus, I'll do anything to stop doing the dishes again.”
Remus gave him a glare as Sirius smiled cheekily up at him, before he turned to James who shrugged. “She makes you happy, man.” He offered before Lily leaned forward with a chime. “And no one deserves to marry Greyback.”
Remus slowly nodded and felt a rush of adrenaline. “Yeah. Yeah, let's do it.” He turned to the three, “What's the plan?”
~~~
“So let me get this straight.” Lily mused as she looked into the passenger hanging mirror, as they drove down the street like muggles. “Greyback turned this girl into a werewolf? And her parents are just going to.. marry her to him?” She scoffed and Remus nodded, clenching his jaw as he slipped his wand in his waistband.
“That's foul.” Sirius hissed with his head half out the window, smoking a cigarette. Remus once again muttered something in the affirmative.
James glanced back at Remus from where he was driving. “Okay Moony, you sure this will work? Just going to walk out with her?”
“If she'll have me.” Remus muttered and leaned back fully with a sigh. “Thanks for coming.” He mumbled.
Sirius nudged him and Remus looked at him from the corner of his eye. “Anything to ruin another pureblood legacy.”
“I'm starting to think this is more about that than helping me, Sirius.”
“Can't it be both?”
“Certainly not.”
“I'm sure it can.” Lily mused from the front seat.
“Certainly can.” James remarked and Remus groaned, followed by a fit of giggles.
“I can't believe she likes you guys.” Remus mumbled and Lily gave a startled gasp. “What? Awe, she likes us!?”
“Oh look, we’re here.” Remus interrupted her and she gasped. “Remus Lupin!”
“See ya.” He chuckled and climbed out.
The celebration was at the {L/N} manor. As Remus walked up, he was ushered in past the people getting their names checked. Not at all jarring, might you add.
His coat was taken by a house elf and another handed him a drink. He gave a small thank you and then winced when one looked at him with surprise and the other like he was dirt. His eyes scanned the full room, and they landed on the man of the hour.
He looked as slimy as he remembered. Like a sore thumb in a place like this, it just seemed to push how much of a punishment this must of been. He looked around the manor and noticed you were nowhere to be found. He remembered from your letters, your room was on the first floor. Well, time to go hunting.
~~~
You were in your room, sitting by your vanity and trying to push back the time as much as you could. Your debut was happening in thirty minutes. It was like the clock was taunting you. You sat in silence, with your mother putting the final touches on your makeup.
“You should have listened to me. You shouldn't have lied.” Your mother spoke in a cruel tone. Tutting out about your features as she did. “This wouldn't be happening. You could of been happy with that Black boy, he is friends with that Lupin kid too, you could of-”
“Could of lied to myself? Become an obedient housewife? Or sneak off with my husband's best friend behind his back?” You snarked in a calm tone and she scoffed. “If that's what you wanted, you could have had it. You are a {L/N}, yes, but you are my daughter. You should have known how to make this work for you. Without making us bring his kind into our family.”
“Ha! His kind? Mother, I think you've forgotten! I am his kind! And you're about to marry me off to the man who made me one!” You shouted, met with a firm slap across your cheek. You lifted your hand to touch the tender skin as your mother stood up and stomped to the door. “Finish up and be out here in 20 minutes, I will not wait longer than that.”
You were left in your room. It was quiet again. Your head leaned back to stop the tears that threatened to pour. You resisted the urge to cry, straightening up when you heard your door open. Taking a deep breath, figuring it to be your father. “I am still not ready.” You whispered.
“You look bloody magnificent, what else is there to do?”
That voice. Oh Merlin please.
You shot to your feet and turned to face him, startled. “R-Remus! What are you doing here?” You asked quickly, walking over to him to yank him fully into the room and close the door.
He instinctively wrapped his arms around your waist and smiled bright at you. “I've come to get you.” He whispered and you took a deep breath. “Remus, what are you talking about?” You whispered and he gave you a determined look.
“Do you trust me?”
“... yes?” You whispered and he lit up.
“Good enough, do you love me?”
“Remus-”
“Do you?” He pried and leaned closer. You took a deep breath and slowly nodded. “Yes.”
He gave a large and exaggerated sigh of relief, pulling a giggle from you. “Thank Merlin, I thought this was for nothing.” He whispered and pulled out a box from his coat pocket. Your jaw dropped and you looked around quickly before you rapidly shook your head. “Remus, don't be foolish.”
“The only thing foolish about me is not asking you to stay with me. I know this is fast, but I think I've known for a while.” He declared and opened the box. It was a modest ring, very unlike the large stone on your hand now.
“Remus-”
“Princess, I know. For once, stop thinking as a {L/N}. Think like a {Y/N}. Better, if I beg enough, would you think like a Lupin?” He begged and you gave a watery laugh. Covering your mouth with your gloved hand and shook your head, this time in amusement as he got down on one knee. He seemed to light up at your delight.
“You look like a fool.” You giggled out and he shook his head.
“Only thing that could possibly make me look like a fool now is if I brought back my mothers ring with no one attached to it, princess.” He implored and you gave another laugh. It sounded like heaven to him.
“Unless you want me on both knees? I can do that, darling, I can.” He declared and you shook your head. “Remus, get up and put the ring on my damn finger.”
He gave you the most dazzling smile as he stood. Taking your hand and throwing Greyback’s ring across the room. Giving you a goofy look as he slipped his mother’s ring on your finger. You gave him a bright smile and bit your lip. Before grabbing him by his lapels and yanking him down into a kiss. It lasted no longer than a moment before you both pulled away in a fit of giggles. “So, what's your plan to get us out of here?”
“Simple, really.” He mused and scooped up your hand and walked backwards to the door. “We run.”
Your jaw went slack and your eyes widened. “You're mad!”
“Think like a Lupin, darling.” He teased and yanked you out of the room. You have a startled yelp when you came face to face with your mother. Surely there to bring you to your debut. You looked at Remus who bit the corner of his lip and yanked you along.
In another fit of giggled and young foggy foolishness. You both ran. Ran past your mother, who made no move to stop you, past the ballroom, past several guests, when you were finally noticed you ran right past your shouting father and a rather angry looking Greyback.
You ran after Remus, eventually he stopped by a car, and you laughed. “You came in a muggle car!?” You exclaimed in delight and he smiled. “Get in, will ya!?”
You hurried in and bumped into Sirius, looking up at him with wide eyes as Remus closed the door behind them, “Drive!”
“Congratulations, pretty girl.” Sirius spoke up. “Lovely dress.”
“Thank you.”
You gave him a bright smile and looked to the front seat, James focusing on the road and Lily looking behind her seat and waving. “Hey! We met once before, nice to meet you officially!” She introduced herself with a calm that was certainly not matching the manic sounds outside the car. “My name is Lily! Lily Evans. Looks like we match.” She mused and flashed her ring. You couldn't stop smiling like an utter fool. “Nice to meet you!”
“This is Sirius Black.” She introduced, and Sirius leaned forward with a nod, you have a brief greeting, before she turned back to the front and put her hand on James’s arm. “This is James Potter, my lovely fiancé.” She chimed as your eyes locked with a stupid love sick looking Remus.
“Have I mentioned how I love your friends?” You whispered and he leaned forward and took your lips for his own.
Lily was curious when you didn't respond and glanced back, just in time for Sirius to complain. “Merlin, why am I stuck back here with the horny teens!?"
#harry potter#harry potter fanfiction#remus lupin x reader#remus x reader#james potter#james x lily#lily#lily evans#sirius black#peter pettigrew#mauraders#mauraders era#pureblood!reader#werewolf!reader#regulus black#barty crouch junior#barty crouch jr#barty x evan#evan rosier#rosekiller#mary macdonald#think like a lupin#remus lupin
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🫧 ᴛʜᴇᴏᴅᴏʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛᴛ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
🫧 ʙɢ ᴍᴜꜱɪᴄ: ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ!
🫧 ꜰʟᴜꜰꜰ
🫧 ᴀ/ɴ: ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴛʜᴀɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ꜰɪᴄ ꜰᴏʀ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴏɴ ᴍʏ ꜰɪʀꜱᴛ ᴏɴᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴅᴏʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢᴜʏꜱ’ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛꜱ ꜱᴏ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ʙᴇ ᴀꜰʀᴀɪᴅ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ᴏɴᴇ!
🫧 ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ꜰɪɴᴀʟʟʏ ᴜɴᴡɪɴᴅɪɴɢ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴀʟʟ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱᴛʀᴇꜱꜱ ᴏꜰ ꜱᴄʜᴏᴏʟ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀ ɢᴏʀɢᴇᴏᴜꜱ ᴠᴀᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ɪɴ ɪᴛᴀʟʏ. ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇɴ’ᴛ ᴀᴡᴀʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ’ᴅ ʀᴜɴ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴀɴᴇ ᴏꜰ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇxɪꜱᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ: ᴛʜᴇᴏᴅᴏʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛᴛ
Azure blue skies and endless summer breeze tails you through the rolling green countryside of San Gimignano, Italy. This was true, pure bliss. A flow of relaxation that you haven’t felt since…Merlin knows when. The stress of endless exams and finals, everlasting prefect duties, and bickering with your horrid nemesis really left a mark; as represented by your unrelenting dark circles and deep forehead lines.
But at least all of that was giving way to the Italian atmosphere and it left behind a happy girl that would donate a kidney to spend her entire summer here. Unfortunately you were only visiting for a week before school began once more; your final year. This brought a sense of dread to your heart as you would miss the enchanting castle. Your second home.
You pushed that aside as you zoomed through the countryside of this ravishing country on your cute little teal Vespa. Truth be told you’d never driven a muggle vehicle before, but there’s always a first time for everything.
And so your lack of experience with muggle vehicles was the cause of you not being aware that gas has to be filled. You thought the meter getting closer to 0 represented the dissipation of your happy mood as you were, per usual, plaguing yourself with paranoid and pessimistic thoughts. The sudden shuddering of the Vespa made you lose balance and you began veering off track, you and your precious vehicle zooming down a hill with the sheer force of gravity. You screamed for dear life, and, at last, landed in a shallow pond with an enormous splash.
You bobbed up, gasping for air, and scrambled out of the lake quite ungracefully, summer outfit ruined and soaking wet. And suddenly, you heard a scarily familiar, devilish chuckle that just so happened to find your tragic predicament amusing: your mood as drenched as your clothes.
As you slowly glanced up trembling, not knowing if your shaking was from the water, shock, pure rage, or all three, you made direct eye contact with a certain boy musing at your tragedy. His eyes were overflowing with humor as he was leaning against a tree, his tanned legs crossed over each other. He seemed to be reading a book which he put down as he had found something better worth his attention. He gracefully stands up, a complete contrast from how you scrambled out of the pond, much to your annoyance.
“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, angioletto mio?” He smirks.
“Nott,” you scoffed. “Small world…or cruel fate,” you stand there, dripping wet, arms spread out like a martyr.
Of course you knew the insufferable Theodore Nott was Italian and often visited family here, but you didn’t think you’d be subjected to his presence in such a big country, especially in the less populated countryside. It was truly just cruel fate that brought this spawn of satan before your eyes.
“I didn’t know you were that desperate to see me,” Theodore cocks his head to the side, quite enjoying this arrangement. “Risking your life on a muggle vehicle zooming to my town.”
You roll your eyes, and if you were in a cartoon universe, trust that there would be steam coming out of your ears.
“Trust me Nott. I had no intention to run into a walking headache on my vacation.”
The insufferable git kept smiling, moving closer now, standing right in front of you so you could smell the usual dizzying scent of sandalwood and pine. Summer edition Theo had a hint of citrus mingled in with his intoxicatingly annoying scent.
“I already got you soaking wet, now you just have to get naked,” he laughed with the most disgustingly smug look on his face that you almost slapped off.
“Are you done?” You glared at him, ready to storm off and free yourself from the torment of his presence.
He shrugged, looking you over.
“Need help drying off?”
“I need help out of this conversation.”
“Oh stop, y/n, you can do better than that,” he grinned
You sigh very well aware you had no other option. You hold out your arms and shut your eyes waiting for his casting of the Hot Air Charm. Since you had resolved to live the simple muggle life for this vacation, your wand was locked in a vault at your hotel room.
Theo laughs, “Are you waiting for a kiss, principessa?”
You open your eyes, confused. “No, I’m waiting for you to dry me off like you said, idiot.”
He laughs again shrugging and says, “I don’t carry my wand around my domain, there’s no need.”
“Then, pray do tell me, Nott, what was your plan in helping me?”
He gives you the most shit-eating grin and grabs your hand, scaring you a bit, then begins pulling you up another grassy, verdant hill: one that isn’t hiding a body of water behind it. You have the urge to resist, but just give in. The drop from your adrenaline-rush you’d been maintaining for the past 3 days had collapsed, causing you to come down with an attitude of resolve. He dragged you up the hill, your wet sandals making squelching sounds, each one demeaning you more and more. You hated this shift in power where the perfect git was overshadowing you. You hated it. You hated him. I think.
“So why were you in the countryside? Other than wanting to see me so badly, of course.” He looks behind him and shoots his watercolor poison into your soul as he makes that unblinking eye contact. Another thing on the meter-long list of things you despise about him.
“I was in a self-deprecating mood and decided to ruin my record streak of relaxation by finding you,” you deadpanned as you rolled your eyes for extra affect.
“Y/N relaxing? You must be lying.”
He chuckled a bit as you two stopped at the top of the vast hill, looking down to a meadow of wildflowers. They glowed like colorful jewels in the blinding, comforting summer sun.
“What’re you gonna do, push me off?” You smirked, half wishing he’d do so. Maybe this was all a nightmare. A beautiful, lush, tinged with the familiar scent of Theo nightmare.
What you didn’t expect, however, was him saying:
“Precisely.”
And with a surprisingly gentle tug, he pulled you down on the top of the hill, pushed you back in a laying position before you could protest, and quite literally pushed you down the hill. You screamed as you, for the second time that day, gave all free will up to gravity, rolling down the hill at a crazy speed. You knew Nott was your unproclaimed but painfully obvious nemesis but you never thought he’d attempt murder. You finally stopped and lay there, sprawled on your back, heaving from the rush. It was kind of…fun?
Theo rolled down right next to you, laughing, as he sat upright. There was grass in his curly, brunette hair that you couldn’t help but reach out to pluck. He looked away quite shyly. Did your eyes deceive you, or did he just blush? You must have heat stroke. Good thing you had your wet clothes to keep you cool: they were significantly drier now.
You stand up and Theo starts laughing in a way you’ve never heard him laugh before. It was almost…endearing?
You put your hands on your hips teasingly and ask, “What? Do I have something on my face?”
He chuckles affectionately. “Mio angioletto, you have something…everywhere.” He bursts into laughter again. “Beware grass woman rising from the Italian hills,” he gasps through his fits of laughter.
You couldn’t help but smile so wide; his happiness was almost as contagious as his teasing.
You look down and realize the grass was sticking all over your outfit, covering you in verdant greeness. There was an itching sensation bubbling to your skin, but you ignored it. You couldn’t help but join in with his laughter as you could imagine you looked like green Chewbacca.
“Is this your sick way of tar and feathering me, Nott?”
He recovers from his laughter and stands up with you, peeling a wet blade of grass from your cheek.
“Alas, you have uncovered my motives,” he teases, grinning.
“Well, your actual motives didn’t work. I’m still sopping wet.” You wringe out the side of your shirt for dramatic affect as it produces a downpour of water.
“There’s more to my motives, mio angioletto. If at first you don’t succeed, try try again.” He grasps your hand again with a beautiful look on his glowing face and pulls you up to do it all over again.
And again.
And again.
And again.
Until the sun is caressing the distant hills, getting ready for its nightly departure. The sky is painted shades of teal and purple; still bright but just so. The breeze is still gentle, and so is Theo’s hold on your hand, as he guides you back to his tree by the wretched pond.
Don’t ask yourself what you and him were at the moment. Don’t ask yourself how years of rivalry and pranks. Of stress related to the both of your never-relenting efforts to beat the other. Don’t ask how that all faded away, as you sat in the setting sun.
Unfortunately, it isn’t in your nature to just ignore logic. And Theo knew it. So he distanced himself from you in light of the passing moment of rolling down flower dotted hills, letting go of your hand. It was as if an igniting flame in your heart had been stifled. He sat across from you by the tree. A silence falling between you two.
The slight itching you had felt earlier had been slowly increasing, and as the fun fell away, it began grabbing your attention. The feeling was in your throat now…something wasn’t right. And that’s when you remembered something that Theo’s warm presence had melted away from your mind. As if your brain had tricked itself to forget about this important fact to permit you and Theo’s fun. You were allergic to wildflowers. If exposed to them for a long time? Horribly allergic.
You started coughing and then choking, pointing to your neck to alert Theo to the problem. His eyes widened as he realized what was happening…he had noticed your uncharacteristically red skin, but he had dismissed it by thinking it was the sun’s doing. How could he overlook this?
Your choking grew louder as you fell onto the grass, Theo scrambled around crazily not knowing what to do in his initial panic.
But then he remembered
He pulled out his wand and cast a healing spell which would diminish every affect of an allergic reaction. You started being able to breathe again and your throat cleared, along with your skin returning to its original color and texture. You were gasping in shock, slightly embarrassed that you had been in such pathetic situations in front of Theodore twice today. You were both holding each others’ arms and breathing deeply. You recovered slightly, attempting to lighten the tense mood.
“Well, if your true motive was to kill me, Nott, I’d say you almost succeeded.” You let out a weak, unconvincing laugh.
“I..I am so sorry, y/n, I genuinely didn’t know..” he looked crestfallen. More shaken than you in fact. Wait a minute…
“Hold on,” you raised an eyebrow, your shock of almost dying completely gone and replaced with a new shock. “I thought you said you didn’t have your wand?”
Theo’s eyes widened sheepishly and he grinned, looking as guilty as ever.
“Ok listen before you throw a fit-“
“I don’t throw fits, I diplomatically argue.”
“Before you throw a tantrum, let me explain.” Theo runs his fingers through his hair looking nervous, and, for the first time, failing to make eye contact.
“I just…I knew you’d leave if I just dried you off. You only stayed because you needed help and, well…” he sighs.
“Well?”
“Well, I’ve been thinking about you all summer, y/n. I lay awake all night and I day dream all day. I swear I even saw you in the stars..” he gives a nervous, strained laugh.
“You never leave my thoughts, but I was sure it was just because I had to prove myself. To beat you. But you didn’t even leave my brain after school ended. You haunt me every day. When I saw you I thought I was hallucinating, like, genuinely.” He runs his hand through his hair, looking the most vulnerable he’s ever looked.
You look at him, eyes blazing with emotions you had denied yourself. Emotions that fought to be seen but you always pushed them back. You couldn’t fight back anymore. What were you even fighting against? God, you had some serious issues.
“And so you lied to make me stay?”
Theo nodded, looking to the side, up at the darkening sky.
“Maybe it was the universe that brought me here, because what are the fucking odds?”
You both laughed at that, eyes shining despite the escaping light around you.
“Theo, in my last 3 days I’ve been in your beautiful home country, I’ve visited so many places. The Trevi Fountain, the Pantheon, the Uffizi Galleries. So many amazing places, and I’ve experienced the most inspiring ordeals. But today was, by far, my favorite day.”
Theo regains his composure after hearing that, playfully judging her with his shoulder .
“Because of me, hm?”
You roll your eyes, looking away.
“Say it, principessa..” he prompted, gently holding your face and focusing it towards him.
You dramatically sigh and admit, “Yes, Theodore Nott. Because of you.”
He smiled the most breathtaking smile. If only you could capture a picture of it, but unfortunately your camera went down with the Vespa. You lay your head on his shoulder and squeeze your eyes shut, so that his bright smile could be engraved into your mind. Definitely a core memory.
After many moments of comfortable silence, Theo perks up.
“Oh! By the way, dolcezza, I realized I said the pickup line wrong when you struggled out of the swamp.”
You rolled your eyes at his impertinence and said, “First of all, it’s a pond, Theo. And second of all I did NOT struggle. I emerged like Aphrodite in a shell.”
“Ok my little swamp monster,” he annoyingly nuzzled his nose into your hair as you fought to hold back a giggle.
“Okok let me say the line.”
“Go ahead, Theo.”
“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
You cocked an eyebrow at him.
“Because you have the face of un angelo.”
He grinned his shit-eating grin as you pretended to retch at the line. Jumping up with the fireflies around you, you tagged Theo, reigniting that competitive streak you both so closely shared. You both laughed like maniacs as you raced up the hill again, fireflies dancing around you in a waltz.
#theodore nott x you#theodore nott fluff#slytherin boys#theodore nott#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott one shot#theodore nott x reader
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Sebastian x Reader: i love you, it's ruining my life (One Shot)
Plot | Sebastian has the worst insomnia known to man and you are not dating him. Tags | none, fluff, slytherin!reader, bad english accent attempt by me, repressed feelings, unhealthy attachment, codependency, teenagers trying to process trauma together, mentions of nightmares, they are both 17 years old [A/N : FUCK JK ROWLING!!!!!!! Also I just needed to write something and somehow a depressed Slytherin boy was just the one to cure my insane writer's block. Enjoy!]
I am not dating Sebastian Sallow, is what you kept saying yet no one seems to ever believe you. Even Natty, bless her kind soul, gave you a look so incredulous as the words went out of your mouth that you couldn’t help but be confused yourself -- were you dating Sebastian?
“I’m not trying to be nosy, my friend. I’m just concerned.”
“About what?” This has been the third person this month with that same irritating expression on their face. Pity.
“I thought … you were always together that I just assumed there was … something.”
You blinked, trying not to let your face slip, afraid that your ever observant friend would read too much into each emotion.
“Well, there’s nothing. So you and the others can –”
“There are others?!”
You widened her eyes, telling Natty to drop it and she wisely did. “The rest of you can stop reporting his rendezvous to me. Understood?”
“There you are!”
Merlin, will the cruel gods of fate ever give you a break?
The deep voice from the door cut through half of the conversations in your table as Sebastian jogged towards you. “Morning, pet.”
He casually grabbed your head gently, pressing a kiss on top of it, before settling down by straddling the chair so he was facing you. “Hey Natty, got lost?”
It wasn’t unheard of for students to not stick to the assigned tables on their houses but it was still odd, especially for someone like Natty who much preferred the company of like-minded people. Always said that the quiet and whispers in the Slytherin table made her uneasy.
Natty looked from you, to him, to the arms that was hidden under the table but was no doubt placed on your waist, subtly but insistently pulling you closer. You silently pleaded for her to ignore it which she thankfully did with a sigh.
“Not at all, Sebastian. Just trying to keep our friend company before you undoubtedly steal her away for the day.”
He didn’t even pretend to be offended by the accusation, only chuckling good-heartedly. “You can be welcome to tag along just for today.”
“Wouldn’t want to intrude. And with the trouble the two of you get into I’d be grounded by my mother for the rest of my life.”
The three of them laughed at that. The conversation thankfully flowing easier and away from the initial topic. Once Ominis arrived and Poppy was called over it was like fifth-year again. The initial circle you had formed has always been a source of comfort, no longer having to have your guard up all the time especially as easy conversation flowed between each other.
“I got some new books for you, just got delivered an hour ago. We should read it tonight.”
You fed him a piece of bread in your hands, knowing that his growing appetite has not been satiated by the plate he made for himself but he would be too lazy to make a new one and would just rather take bits and pieces from your own. “Just for me, huh?”
He grabbed a tuft of grapes before feeding you one as well before he demolished the entire thing. You couldn’t help but giggle when he spat out a small branch that managed to sneak into his mouth.
“It’s that new muggle series you love, paid off one of Ominis’ servant to line for it so you wouldn’t have to sneak out of Hogwarts like I know you had planned to tonight.”
You could feel your face heating up at the fact that he knew you too damn well. “You know I don’t like you spending money on me, Sebastian.”
“Well, you’re gonna be reading it to me so technically I’m spending money for me.”
You gave him a look but he quickly evaded it by feeding you another pair of grapes.
Sebastian had been haunted by nightmares after last year’s events. Ones so bad that the nurse feared he would be a bit too dependent on sleeping potions at such a young age. Thankfully, the two of you had found a solution together, after a late night studying in the Undercroft reading your notes aloud hoping it would stick into your head a bit better – you had turned to find your companion snoring away beside you.
At first, the two of you thought it was the history lesson that put him right to slumber so you borrowed tons of history books in the library for him to read before he slept but an enchanted note later and you were dragging your sleepy self and a blanket out of your chambers as you read about the History of Magic in his bed.
It was that night that you had been eternally grateful that he had no other roommate but Ominis. Especially when you found out that Sebastian was apparently a horrible koala when asleep.
“That’s just –”
“What are you two whispering about?”
You actually jumped, pushing Sebastian away as if the soft voice behind them reminded you of how they had actually drifted closer than what was appropriate.
“Arieta,” Sebastian greeted her with a raised brow, seemingly confused why the Ravenclaw was this far off the room not even all that affected that his new girlfriend just caught him being a bit too comfortable with another girl.
“Sebby!” she shrieked prettily, quickly recovering and pulling on his arm. “We have History of Magic together, remember? You know I can’t survive that class without your shoulder to sleep on.”
She can hear Ominis choke on a laugh yet Arieta shot you a look like it was your fault.
“I, uh,” Sebastian turned to your table, now fully aware that everyone was staring at him with various expression on their faces. “Right, let’s go.”
Ever the gentleman, Sebastian was quick to grab the books in Arieta’s arm as she held on to his hand and dragged him towards the doors.
“Arieta, huh, wouldn’t have pegged her as territorial one,” Natty chuckled, you chucked a grape at her. “What? I am only speaking my mind. Might have to watch out for that one or she might just drag poor Sebastian away from –”
Just before she finished her sentence Sebastian came bounding down the path once again stopping just beside you, catching his breath. “Hey, you’re mine tonight, okay? No adventures.”
His wording left so much to be misinterpreted that even Poppy’s eyes nearly popped out of her head, damn near resembling those mooncalfs she loves so much.
"I stand corrected," Natty muttered.
“Sebby!” Arieta screamed at the end of the hallway.
Merlin’s beard.
“I’m coming!” He threw her an impatient look before holding on to your chin so you were looking at him and forcing you to nod. “No adventures.”
This time the embarrassment of the absolute mess that was unfolding before your unfinished breakfast have overwhelmed your brain that you could only nod with him.
“No adventures.”
Sebastian smiled, one of those real, bright ones that makes your body malfunction and your heart to stop beating. Pressing one last kiss on the top of your head and managing to wave to your shared friends he was off and gone through the double doors.
The entire table was left in silence and you had hoped they would let this go but Natty couldn’t give you that mercy as she cleared her throat.
“Well, now I got even more questions.”
You’re not dating Sebastian Sallow you just think about him a lot.
You weren’t as daft as the rest of them have probably assumed. You did think there was a lot more than friendship between Sebastian and you. But with all the things that the two of you had been through it was difficult to pinpoint what it exactly was aside from their unusually intense loyalty to each other.
Was it a trauma bond? Was it just their kindred spirits refusing to let the one soul who understood them go? Did everything that they went through, the secrets they keep, the curses they threw to protect each other become the bloody ribbon that held the unhealthy attachment they had to each other? It could be love. But it could be a whole lot more complicated than that.
That’s what they were. They were complicated.
After the nightmare that was your fifth year the two of you had kept to yourselves with Ominis in tow, trying to keep as low as profile as possible and give your poor professors a break. With your newfound infamy as the ‘Hero of Hogwarts’ (blergh) and the dark secret you three were desperately keeping for Sebastian, the best you could hope for was to blend in with the rest of the nameless students in Hogwarts.
That agreement got shot into hell when your dear friend Sebastian Sallow proved to be one of the best beaters in Hogwarts’ long, long history. It was a dare that exploded in your own face to try out and irritate Imelda but when he had accidentally proven to be a bit too good at it their mutual friend clutched at him with her demanding claws and put him through the ringer until he got spat out decent enough to be one of the soldiers to secure the honor of their noble house and win the Quidditch cup this year.
Piled on top of that development was his connection to the Gaunt family, the Hero of Hogwarts, and the rumor of his hefty trust fund waiting for him the moment he turns 18 – Sebastian Sallow, just as the gods intended, became the most eligible bachelor of his age.
And thus your hell begun.
The silent charm he always had with him grew with his stature. He clearly enjoyed the attention after having hid his pretty bloody face behind dangerous books all year last year that it was almost like he was compensating for the hearts he could’ve broken. Every moon it was a different girl looped around his arms and every month it was a different friend reporting to you that your presumed ‘boyfriend’ was found snogging a goddamn Gryffindor in the Three Broomsticks.
It was annoying, confusing, and you were getting sick of it.
“Over here.”
Before you could find the source of the voice you knew all too well, a door had already opened and you were quickly pulled into an empty room – well, room was being generous as it was more of a storage space than anything.
“Sebastian!”
“Shh,” you gawked when his opened palm muffled your voice as he firmly presses it on your mouth. The unmistakable sounds of footsteps and a softer call of his name echoed the hallway outside the door. When the footsteps faded and disappeared, he had the nerve to give you a lopsided grin that turned your face red in irritation. Definitely in irritation.
Nothing quite like being forced to face the boy who had been running around your head all day.
“Sorry bout that, pet,” he chuckled, leaning on the wall an arms-length way from you. “I’m not too good with break-ups, especially when they say no.”
“Must be horrifying,” you sniped shortly, also pressing your back on the nearest wall to give you as much space as possible – it would just be absolutely mortifying to faint because your heart was beating too fast it was like it was trying to escape. “Are you gonna explain why you’ve kidnapped me in this dingy room?”
“Come on now, don’t be short with me. I just wanted to hang out with you ‘s all.”
“You want to hang out with me …. Inside a closet?”
He shrugged, “I never see you anymore these days.”
Ah, the nightmares must be back. She tries to swallow down the bitter taste in her mouth.
“That’s not my fault, Sebastian.”
At least he looked guilty. And absolutely miserable.
In the few weeks you had taken your eyes off him it would seem he had another growth spurt. Do boys just not stop growing ever? Looking up at him was starting to get painful. Plus, all those drills they run to prepare for every game had done nothing but well for his physique. You couldn’t help but run your eyes to his broad chest and shoulders before you caught yourself and nearly screamed in horror.
“Hey, I’m sorry,” Rough hands grabbed one of yours. He bent his knees so he could look in your eyes as you now outright refuse to meet his, in anger for the absolute shit friend he had been the past months or in embarrassment that you so casually checked him out you’re not quite sure. “I … I got distracted but I missed you. You know I prefer your company over any other.”
Those damned brown eyes, not even the poor light in the windowless room could dull its effect on you. “Flattery will get you nowhere.”
Your harsh words did not match with the growing smile on your face you failed to suppress. He mirrored your grin, “Do you still have classes?”
You shook your head.
He damn near vibrated in glee. Merlin, you did miss him.
“Let me steal you away.”
In a flash, Sebastian grabbed a hold of your hand to survey the hall one last time before dragging you out of the room and into the nearest Floo. You barely caught the surprise and anger in his ex-girlfriend’s eyes as she gawked by the stairs before you got swallowed up by a green flash of powder.
“Boathouse.”
You’re not dating Sebastian Sallow because this is definitely not a date.
You wouldn’t think the Boathouse would be a romantic place but with the lack of students, the dimming sun and a gorgeous boy leading you in the inside of it for privacy – you couldn’t help but think that anyone who would pass by would be well within their right to think you had become another notch in Sebastian Sallow’s belt.
You’re not sure how you feel about that. A greater witch would’ve been offended but maybe you’re no better than the knots in his belt.
“Sit here.”
Sebastian spread out a worn-out black robe on the ground, patting on it expectantly. Before you could do it yourself, he was already kneeling beside you and removing your shoes and socks. The intimate act forced you to hold your breath, making sure you controlled your face so your jaw doesn’t fall to the floor as he slowly pulled on your socks, gently plopping them on the edge and letting the Black Lake’s water tickle your feet as they dangled.
When you were settled, he nonchalantly laid his head down on your lap. Gods, help you.
“Comfortable, aren’t you?”
He made a dramatic noise of satisfaction, even wiggling in your lap to show his assent. A giggle slipped out of your mouth at the absolute gall of him, your hands naturally falling in his soft, thick, brown hair to play with it.
“What had you been up to, pet?” he mumbles, eyes never leaving your face although you find yourself unable to do the same as you opted to look around the architecture of the Boathouse you rarely visit.
“Nothing much,” you shrugged. “Although I did find that swimming in the Forbidden Forest’s Lake was surprisingly relaxing.”
He hummed, not even surprised at your little antics when you leave his line of sight. The boy had definitely pulled you out of worse situations than roaming around the Forbidden Forest. “You should take me some time. Merlin knows relaxing is what I need.”
A scoff escaped your mouth as you rolled your eyes.
“Yeah, right after I duel your newest girlfriend for the honor of getting to take you out.”
He poked your side at that, “As entertaining that would be you know all you have to do is send me an owl and I’d trek up to Maurenweem for you.”
Your face clearly showed you didn't believe him and he frowned. Carefully, you ran a finger in-between his brows where a frown formed to relax it.
At this angle you could see the toll the sleepless nights he must’ve been having had on him. If the bags on his eyes was any indication it must’ve been a few nights now. You ran your hands on his hair earning you a satisfied hum as he dangled his hand on the edge of the ledge to play with the water below.
“When was the last time you slept?”
He popped one eye open but your gentle touch proved too much as he closed it again with an even longer hum. “A few hours last night.”
“You should’ve woken me up.”
He gently shook his head, grabbing your free hand so he can hold it by his stomach.
“I didn’t wanna bother you.”
“Oh please, Sebastian.”
He chuckled at that, gripping on your hand tightly as he let out a heavy breath. “The nightmares … I thought it’s been better. Barely had any a few months ago. But now it’s just gotten worse.”
The confession broke your heart. Sebastian was not a vulnerable person; despite his usually easy and cheerful demeanor he was quick to wall himself in at the first sign of trouble. You would bet galleons of gold he still feels horrible of all the things he put you through and it was truly in desperation when he had called you over to help him through his insomnia. Which was also why you had welcomed the responsibility with open arms.
“Care to tell? Is it still about Anne?”
His estranged twin has been forefront of most of his darkest nightmares but he shook his head again and for that you were thankful he was spared that at least. “Solomon? Ominis?”
He opened his eyes; it was full of overflowing guilt and fear. And when it seemed he could no longer keep it to himself he sighed, “It’s about you. That’s the reason why I couldn’t …”
The revelation had your blood freezing. “What?”
He sat up, now facing you and taking both of your hands. “I’m only telling you this because you are my best friend and to remind you that none of this is ever your fault. You haven’t done a thing wrong, in fact, I can’t think how I would’ve gotten past any of this if it wasn’t for you.”
You held on to his hands tighter. “Sebastian, you’re scaring me.”
He shook his head, pulling you closer as if to comfort. Why was he comforting you when it was him who had been terrorized by this dream version of you. It was irrational to be mad but how could you not be when apparently you had become one of his problems while you were simultaneously desperately trying to fix it.
A palm on your cheeks pulled you out of your self-loathing.
“All of my dreams … it was of the people I love leaving me. Anne never forgiving me for the rest of my life, Ominis turning me in …”
“Oh, Sebastian,” you buried a sob on the crook of his neck, your hand roping around his back so you can rub on his back comfortingly while he lets everything out.
“And … and every time it happens my brain drives itself insane thinking of plans of what I would do if those nightmares came true. That’s the reason why I couldn’t sleep.” You looked up at him through your lashes but never leaving your spot even as he brings your legs out of the water and over his until you were in his lap.
“But then … they turned to you.” His voice dropped so low you almost shivered. “And for the life of me I just couldn’t … see an out of that. If I lost you – If you gave up on me I … I think I’d turn myself in Azkaban myself.”
“Sebastian I would never –”
“I know that,” he whispered. “But I still can’t – I can’t let it go. I can’t let go of these doubts and fear.”
This time he rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. “That’s why I keep hanging out with all those girls.”
You raised your head in confusion, taking a better look at him.
“I thought if I loved you less, my nightmares would be kinder.”
The breath got caught in your throat. What is he – does he mean –
“But I couldn’t do that either,” He sighed, rubbing a hand on his face, clearly frustrated. “So I’ve decided. I’d rather go insane, let the nightmares do their worst because I am done pretending I don’t love you. I’m done avoiding you, I’m done pretending you aren’t the only light in my life. I’m done. And I love you.”
A fully grown crying Mandrake could drop from the sky and you don’t think you would’ve heard it over your own heart. You could barely comprehend anything but that his grip on your waist was so tight it was almost painful and that his pleading, terrified eyes was in the perfect angle that the late dying sun made it look like it was in a golden fire.
And that Sebastian Sallow … is in love with you. Just as madly as you were with him.
“I’m not forcing you into anything. I needed to let it out. If you want, I fully intend to formally court you until –”
“I love you.” You could no longer bear to put him in such misery. As long as you were alive, he would not question the adoration you’ve felt for him that just kept growing since the first day he had taken you to Hogsmeade. “I love you, Sebastian.”
Just for a moment there was quiet then he burst out laughing. “Thank you, darling." His body visibly shuddered as he sighed in relief, burying his face in your chest. "I’ve already planned to throw myself off the highest cliff in Hogwarts if this had gone south.”
You wrapped your hands around his neck, accepting the gentlest kisses on your neck. “Don’t say that. I plan to be your girlfriend for a very long time.”
His body shook from laughing, this time a kiss under your jaw, “Not that long I hope?”
You frowned, pulling away from him, though his unrelenting hold prevented much space to be in between the two of you. “What do you mean?”
“Well,” his thumbs rubbed circles on your thigh, now seemingly shy. “If all goes well, I had hoped to be engaged by the time we graduate. You won’t be just my girlfriend then.”
"You bastard," You gawked, laughing at his proclamation. The happiness was overflowing in your chest that you couldn’t help but just squeeze him into you hoping maybe that your souls would fuse with each other. “You haven’t even kissed me yet and you’re already pre-proposing?”
He licked his lips, his sleepless eyes now full of vigor. “Ah, we gotta fix that, don’t we, pet?”
“We’re dating.”
Natty sighed in relief.
Poppy clapped.
Garreth passed Imelda a silver coin.
"Excuse me," Ominis muttered, standing up. “I'm gonna request a room change to the Headmaster.”
#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x reader#sebastian sallow x mc#hogwarts legacy sebastian#sebastian x mc#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow fanfiction
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Everything & Nothing | D.M.
summary: The Universe might hate you and Draco with how many times you’ve run into each other in a span of your mutual breakup.
pairing: ex!draco malfoy x ex!fem!reader
includes: angst, slight fluff
a/n: uhhh, i don’t know why i wrote this but enjoy!
Fate seemed to have a cruel sense of humor; bringing you both into each other’s lives whenever possible. Whether it was a random run-in at an obscure café or an unexpected encounter during a night out with your quite separate group of friends, you kept finding yourselves crossing paths in the most unlikely places which was weird because you both were studying under the same wizarding university, you never ran into one another there.
Each accidental meeting sparked whirlwinds of emotions between the both of you — anger, hurt, nostalgia, and a flicker of something you both thought you had lost long ago.
Harry and Ron didn’t care, in fact, they were delighted you and Draco Malfoy broke it off when you graduated Hogwarts. Hermione couldn’t care less about the boy, but she knew you two were completely and irrevocably in love.
“So, how did last night go with… Remind me, what was the name of that prick?” Ron tapped his chin as you stared at him with the thought of casting a horrifying spell on him.
Hermione hesitated, reached a hand out to stop him before you could pull your wand out. “Ron—“
“Was it not Malfoy? I swear he looked exactly—“
You flicked your wand at him, murmuring only one word that wouldn’t cause him too much pain. “Rictumsempra.”
Ron burst out laughing, causing the muggles walking around you to stare at him incredulously. Harry laughed at him as you wore a proud look on your face, making Hermione sigh and reverse the spell. Well, after a few more seconds of torturous tickling.
“If this is how you all will behave this evening, I will send you all home, do you understand?” Hermione directed her attention to the three standing in front of her, most of her irritation directed toward her other half.
She received half-hearted words of understanding before her face completely softened to look over at you, watching your eyes become distant again. She sighed and separated you from the boys, pulling you in for a hug.
“Have you talked to him recently?” Hermione rubbed your arms softly, words quiet as you sniffled. “What’s wrong?” She was about to ask again, believing you didn’t hear her when you responded with a voice barely above a whisper.
“Is it bad that I miss him?” You wipe a stray tear quickly, wishing nothing but to cover up your embarrassment. “Merlin’s beard, I’m crying in a bookstore about a mutual break up.”
Hermione continued to soothe you as muggles continued to look at them with confusion. This happened at least once a month. You would try and move on from him, but it all came rushing back to you like it was just yesterday.
You sigh and rub your eyes with the heel of your palm, “Give me a second.”
“Take all the time you need, we just you got here so you’ll… be fine.” Hermione locked eyes with someone behind you, her eyes lighting up in surprise. “I’ll be back, I need to make sure Ron and Harry haven’t spend all their money on candies.”
You chuckle and wave her off before shifting your gaze to the bookshelves surrounding you. Did you need a new book? No. Do you want to get a new book even thought you have piles of them in your flat? Yes.
As you scanned the different books adorning the shelves, you found one that caught your eye, one that you’ve been wanting for months. Everywhere else was sold out, but apparently not this random bookstore Hermione brought you to.
Standing on your tippy toes, your fingers barely grazed the cloth material the book was bonded by. Just as you were about to clasp your hand around it, a figure behind you plucked it from the shelf, making you turn to glare at the person.
“Hey, I was—“ You cut yourself off as you faced the familiar man. Even after all these months, he still had the same face you fell in love with years ago, but of course he was maturing with his looks. You mumble out his name, making it sound more like a question than an observation. “Draco.”
He tensed at his name falling from your lips, blue eyes meeting yours. Every time he ran into you, neither of you would acknowledge the other, but this was completely different. He stared at you, hoping and praying that this wasn’t a dream. As he realized his face was in fact getting hotter by the second, he knew this wasn’t a figment of his imagination.
“Hi.” Draco breathed out, his resolve bending to your every will. He watched as you directed your attention to his hands, your hands spinning a ring he thought you threw out long ago. He blinked before clearing his throat and handing you the book, scratching the back of his neck. “Sorry, I was trying to be helpful.”
“It’s fine.” You mutter quietly, your fingers brushing against his, sending sparks down your body.
The room felt hot and heavy and you didn’t know what to do but stand there and bask in the awkwardness that came upon the both of you. You felt for the pages in the book before Draco pressed closer to you, apologies spilling out of his mouth the closer he got as an old woman struggled to get past behind him.
As she finally slipped through, Draco immediately removed himself from you; and from habit, tucked a loose piece of your hair behind your ear before realizing his mistake.
“I’m sorry— I didn’t mean to—“
You stop his rambling before he could go on for any longer, “It’s alright, Draco. No… No harm done at all.” You clasped your hand around the book, nails anxiously tapping against its hard cover. “Uh… It was nice to see you…”
Draco watched as you turned to leave before reached out for your shoulder, making you turn back to face him with a surprised look.
“Wait.”
You looked at the hand on your shoulder and followed his arm up to his face, feeling your own face heat up as his turned equally as red. He quickly removed his hand and tucked them into his pockets — you knew that meant he was nervous. And so were you.
“Can we talk?” He asked softly, slightly bouncing on the balls of his feet. You watch him with slight amusement before nodding, lips curling up to an even bigger smile when you noticed his eyes light up at your agreement. You allowed him to lead the way before looking down at the book.
As you watch him head for the door, you stop him briefly. “Give me a second, I have to pay for the book still.” Before you could even hear how much your total was from the bored cashier, Draco shoved his muggle money to the cashier in hopes to make the process faster.
You rolled your eyes with a small smile on your face, taking the paper bag from the counter and making your way to the front of the bookstore to wait for him. You shut your eyes briefly as the small snippets of conversations floated around the store, the random tales of their lives making small movies in your mind until a hand softly squeezed your shoulder.
“Mm, you done?” You murmur, eyes fluttering up to see a content Draco. Tilting your head over to the cashier, you saw her making goo-goo eyes toward him, specifically a place no one decent should be looking at in public. “You don’t mind if we could talk down by the cafe, yeah?”
“Lead the way.” He gestured the front of the door with his chin, eyes watching your calm facade turn into such a fast filled emotion of annoyance and jealousy.
Instead of the bookstore with an over-eager cashier who was ready to get into Draco’s pants, you lead him to a quiet cafe with no one but two old men playing chess at a round table. The smell of freshly baked pastries filled your senses, making you hum in content and sit at your own round table, Draco sitting right across from you.
After a few silent moments, you sighed and stopped spinning your ring, looking up at the blonde in front of you.
“What did you want to talk about?”
Draco gave you a tight-lipped smile, fingers wringing with each other. “Honestly? Everything. I want to talk about our lives — more specifically yours — and how you’ve been.”
You blinked at him. You didn’t know he was still interested in your life, but you did want to know if he ever…
“We don’t have to, but I would like that very much.” He spoke quietly when he caught your dazed look.
Nodding, you begin spinning your ring again. “What do you want to know?”
He smiled softly and began the mirage of questions, each one you happily answered. It was like no time had passed since Hogwarts. It was like nothing ever happened.
Like always, Draco watched you animatedly talk about a new book series you started, your hands flailing around in excitement. His smile never left, even when you would bounce your knee up and down or when you would snap your fingers when you remembered what you were going to say.
In his mind, you were everything he ever wanted. It was heartbreaking to see your face fall when he brought up a topic that you both wanted to know but didn’t want to say.
“I know you don’t want to hear it, especially coming from me, but you haven’t… Have you been going on dates with others or, you know, have a boyfriend?” Draco murmured.
It was almost laughable how the prince of Slytherin fumbled his words and looked almost embarrassed to ask questions such as these.
You pursed your lips and looked over at the bustling street full of muggles. Your voice was quiet when you spoke that Draco could barely hear it over the sound of the people.
“I have, but I didn’t uhm… I didn’t enjoy any of them.”
“Why not?”
The music of a muggle artist you’ve come to love started playing, making you sigh in slight annoyance. Not that you disliked the song, but because of how similar the song was to your current life.
“They didn’t meet my standards.” You meet his eyes with a distant look, his own eyes shining with interest. “It seemed like none of them could because every time I went on one — which wasn’t many — something always reels me back.”
He hummed, glancing down at your ring with slight curiosity. “And what are those standards?”
You bite your inner cheek as you look off to the side where a happy couple was walking around a fountain and pointing at the water spouts.
“I’m not sure… Just someone who I know would understand me. Someone who will willingly indulge in my interests without being rude or judgmental.” You tucked your hand to adjusted your wand poking into your side. “And preferably someone who’s already a wizard or witch. I don’t want to explain the whole thing to a muggle.”
Draco raised his eyes brows in surprise before a small smirk decorated his lips. You were still a Slytherin through and through. “Sounds like fun.”
You scoffed, “Okay, your turn. How has the dating pool been for you?”
“Actually I haven’t gone on any.” He sat back and crossed his arms across his chest, watching you flush red in embarrassment. “What’s with the face, princess?”
Stupid princess of Slytherin. You thought.
“I just thought you would’ve… Never mind.” You spin the ring again. Just before you could speak once more, Draco cut you off, surprise etching your face at the question.
“Why do you still wear that ring? I thought you would have burned it the second you could.” He tilted his head as your cheeks burned much hotter. “Or better yet, have thrown it in a rubbish heap.”
You glanced down at the Malfoy Signet adorning your ring finger. It wasn’t as big and bulky as Draco’s, but rather dainty with an emerald placed in its center. He said it was his mother’s and that she wished you would have it instead of her.
“It’s not mine to get rid of.” You slip the ring off and gently cradle it in your palm, the writing written on the inside practically a line you could recite any time if asked. “Besides, it’s too gorgeous for me to get rid of it.”
He hummed and plucked the ring from your palm, noticing your eyes following the movement carefully. “I gave it to you, so the true question is if it truly is yours or not.”
The clattering of plates and chatters from customers around you made you finally ask something that’s been itching to get out the second you agreed to talk to him.
“Why did you want to talk? And don’t say because you want to know everything that happened. And how come you never dated again? Was I that bad of a—“
Your eyes widened in surprise before pulling away, fingers coming up to touch your lips.
“I wanted to talk to you,” Draco started as he held the ring tightly in his fist, looking straight into your eyes. “Because I missed talking to you. I missed being around you without the tension between us. And I never dated anyone else because of you. You weren’t bad, you were… You were everything to me that I couldn’t replace. I couldn’t go on in life without you because I wouldn’t have anything. I would have nothing.”
Silence filled the space between the both of you as your heart began to pace faster and faster, fingers fiddling with one another.
“I swear, the universe either loves or hates us because I see you all the time and I couldn’t come up to you without you thinking it was weird.” Draco sighed and ran his slender fingers through his hair. “I know the break up was mutual for both our benefits, but I can’t help think about how our life’s could’ve been.”
You tentatively reach over his clenched hand and gently pry it open before lacing your hand with his, rubbing the soft of his hand to calm him down.
“I honestly am at a loss of words…” You began your own spiel but only stared at your joined hands. “I know that when we broke up it was going to be hard to move on. I… I really tried to but no one could ever top whatever we had.” You look up to his beautiful blue eyes that you swore could be mistaken for gray. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that… I think we should definitely try again. It’s not like we broke up to something horrible, but I guess we had different pathways for our futures.”
Draco took the ring from his palm and held it in front of you, murmuring words of distaste for a second. “Salazar Slytherin, I’m gonna sound like a fucking geek.”
You smile softly. You missed him so much. Even his stupid remarks.
“Do you promise we’ll try? Because even my worst nightmares couldn’t picture a life without you.” Draco matched your ever growing smile. “Because I have always loved you.”
Scrunching your nose, you leaned over the round table and kissed his lips softly before murmuring your own response. “That was really sentimental of you, you geek.”
He slipped the ring back on your ring finger before capturing your lips again, feeling you smile into it. “Well, I’m your geek, my love.”
read more about draco malfoy here!!
©lqveharrington - all rights reserved. do not copy, translate or share my work on other media platforms
#august’s works 🫧#draco malfoy imagine#draco x reader#draco malfoy angst#draco malfoy one shot#draco fanfiction#draco lucius malfoy#draco malfoy fanfiction#draco malfoy fic#drabble#draco malfoy x reader#draco malfoy smut#draco malfoy#draco malfoy x y/n#draco malfoy fluff#draco malfoy drabble#draco malfoy headcanon#draco malfoy x you#draco malfoy x female reader#draco malfoy x slytherin!reader#draco malfoy blurb#harry potter x reader#harry potter#harry potter characters#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry#hogwarts houses#slytherin
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⋯ ⋯ ﹒ 🎨 ’
in hogwarts legacy, a portrait of a deceased minister is in the hufflepuff's dorm, and that somewhat immortalizes him.
so personally, i think that theodore would have a slight anxiety about you and his son— theo would be damned if he'd ever let his little boy grow up without his mother, like he did.
even worst without the two of you.
i think that theodore would request a portrait to be painted of the two of you, during another trip to italy; the two of you are sat on a garden, together. that immortalizes one of the moments that he was the happiest— with you.
as sad as it is, theodore finds some assurance that even if he died, even if your son becomes an orphan, the two of you would have a way to see him grow up, or offer some words of comfort shall he need it.
( theo wishes that he had a portrait of his mother— the portrait wouldn't be able to hug him, sure— but at least, he wouldn't have forgotten her voice. )
theo would also request another painting of you, and you alone. he'd give his life for you, however, theodore knows better than to trust his luck to fate's cruel decisions.
and merlin, does he pray that he'll never have to seek solace on a portrait of you. ever.
imagine if there was another portrait of him alone !! you know how in harry potter they can go to other frames? imagine theodore's portrait sneaking to yours. ☹️ he could never be without his bella.
#theodore nott#silly drabble#theodore nott husband#headcanons#slytherin boys#hp fandom#theodore nott x reader#theo nott#fluff#angst
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the one
• pairing: theodore nott x riddle!reader
• now playing: hayloft by mother mother / you that i want by divine
• word count: 1.7k
• genre: angst, fluff, hint of smut
— short one that i kept thinking of.
Theo slumped in his chair, fatigue weighing heavily on him. The clock on the wall opposite him ticked relentlessly, unforgiving of his sleepless state. He had long abandoned any hope of finding any rest. He hadn’t been able to since that fateful night when everything felt right in his life.
His mind wouldn’t grant him solace. Each time his weary eyelids dared to meet from the pure exhaustion of the stress of OWLS, the ongoing war, his brain kept feeding him images of you. You, who kept haunting him from the very forefront of his mind.
The natural curve of your eyelashes. The way it fluttered against his cheeks as your lips made a blazing trail across his cheeks. Gentle whispers that drown him in sheer bliss still send shivers down his spine.
His tie lay abandoned, discarded beside him, next to the pile of papers swept aside in his frustration earlier. The long, emerald fabric had felt too suffocating amidst the overwhelming thoughts of you.
He couldn’t help but wonder if you would also be writhing in bed, unable to fall asleep as he does. Would your dreams torment you with the brief time his hands tangled onto your hair, wayward? Does your dormant body spin cruel variations of that time, telling him tantalising tales of what could’ve occurred if only your insufferable blonde companion hadn’t so abruptly interrupted?
He had never loved you.
Not in the way you wanted.
This desire to fill the emptiness in your heart, to have somebody give you the time and day has obscured that truth. A part of you knew, from the very beginning, but this desperation forced you to turn yourself blind.
Draco was there, a constant presence in your life, a perfect match to have by your side. Born only 24 hours apart, and 10 years of your childhood spent solely with him.
In truth, you both used the other, a fact that you ignored. He relied on you for protection and status as your partner, while you clung to him to feel the fleeting sense of warmth. But the perpetual storm of reality always wearing you both down and, you were rapidly losing the strength to keep yourself afloat.
Unspoken words hung heavy in the air between the both of you as the year progressed and the inevitable return of your father neared. At first, you had both kept your feelings at bay, not wanting this to jeopardise your friendship altogether. But as time went on, it became a routine. Venom spit from raised voices, threats of abandonment and indifference to each other, reconciliation accompanied by hollow promises and sex.
“Are you a bloody fool? She is my best friend and yet again, Draco ‘can’t-keep-his-boxers-on’ Malfoy decided that didn’t matter!” You screamed in frustration, but it didn’t seem to matter when he didn’t even so much as falter at the volume.
“We aren’t even together, so why should it?” He carelessly replies, an air of indifference surrounding him.
“We aren’t? You truly are an insufferable git, I spent two years committing myself to you, and you never thought to mention that little detail before?” You scoffed, incredulous at the idea. It was foolish and outrageous, and not at all like how the man you know would think. Despite your differences with one another, he would still treat you with at least the respect you give to a friend, but now…
“Oh please! Don’t act as if your mind has not been completely filled with that mindless buffoon.”
“For Merlin’s sake, do not dare turn this on me…” You challenged him.
“Or what? Threaten to have your father kill me? Well, surprise, darling, I’m no stranger to that already.” He humorlessly chuckles. “I’ve seen you. I’ve seen that god-awful lovesick look on your face at the mere sight of his back. I am not the complete bloody fool you think I am.”
It hurt, truly, despite the fact that this started as a hilarious excuse of a relationship. You cared for Draco and to see him constantly destroy everything and everyone in his path of destruction left you unable to conjure up any more excuses for him.
“I am done, Draco. We can stop whatever awful pretentious act we put ourselves to and live on our own as you seem to hardly care for even yourself anymore these days.” You laugh, defeat etched on your face.
He never gave you the love that you sought, the kind that Theo had laid bare in complete display for you in just under seven minutes in that tiny closet.
“You came back to me.” He whispers, close enough for his lips to touch the corner of your lips but there’s just a stutter of breath. It makes you want to instinctively kneel and look up to him and beg religiously for mercy, the way he speaks.
“I did.” You reply. Unmoving, but your patience wears thin.
“Look at you,” He mutters, his hand tugging at your head by your hair, exposing your neck to him, and your knees nearly buckle at his breath that burns against your jaw. “I haven’t even touched you properly yet and you’re almost like putty in my hands already.”
“Shut it, Nott.” You quickly remark a decision you notably regret when you are left standing in the middle of the room all by yourself. The cold air from the ajar window left your skin tingling with an uncomfortable feeling akin to when Draco touched you in the past weeks.
You scoff, the sound more as if you were nearly pleading. “What are you doing?”
“You know I hate it when you act like a brat.” He inclined his head, and the movement leaves chills running through your spine for the action is almost similar to someone sinister. But weirdly, it makes you want to tease him even more.
“Oh please, Theo. I’m not blind, as if you don’t dream of it.” You slowly approach him, your fingers make a motion of dragging along the ends of the poster beds. “The way I see your eyes tremble when I contradict every single thing you say. I know you are depraved when your thoughts are only of my mouth…”
You hear a sharp intake of breath when you come near. “The way you would just love it if you could shut me up by having my lips wrapped around you. I know you, Theo.”
His lips twitch into a mirthless smile, he reaches almost mindlessly for your collar. His thumb barely touches the skin of your neck. “Yes, you do.”
His eyes are intense as they dart to your mouth. Your tongue unconsciously makes a sweep against your dry lips.
“I suppose Draco will show me exactly how.”
Taking a page of this man’s book is terrifying but you are tired of this game of tug that you keep playing.
“That would be wise. ”
He’s still looking at your lips.
“I’ll go then.” You try again, unwilling to make the move.
“Go on, you won’t hear a sound of protest from me.” But you remain standing in front of him, the will to move weak against the desire to have him.
“Really?”
“No.”
Theo grabs the back of your head, tangled his fingers in your hair, and made a mess of your mouth. With his lips attached to yours, you grab him by his shirt and the both of you kiss as if you were third years again. Your teeth clashed into each other time and time again and you couldn’t find it in you to slow down.
The need to kiss him, to feel what you’ve been thinking of for several nights on end. You push back at him, desperate to feel the same hunger and need in him, as he kisses you deeper and more profound than you ever thought possible.
The soft, selfish hands that you wished so badly to wipe clean off the bodies of other women move up from the bottom of your back to move you impossibly closer until you are almost one. His voice is ragged when he pulls away, a thin thread of saliva still connecting you.
He says against your cheek, “I love you. I’d die for you. Nobody can ever give you what I could make the pain go away like I could, not even that dense fuck who has a deeper sense of self-preservation than his parents.”
You swallow, agonised by the sudden slow pace that he moves. Not an ounce of energy dared to waste to defend your ex. “I will love you anywhere.”
You shiver at the raw and pure intensity that laced the declaration. You almost want to ask, to hear how. But you don’t think your mind could properly comprehend the ability to piece together the right words to ask.
His heart is pounding from beneath your fingers as you feel the pulse on his neck, almost leaping it out as if all it wants is for you to finally claim it as yours. Encase it in a glass case and put it on display for all else to see.
“In a bookstore, by the water fountain, the sidewalk, in the flames of your home.” His hands come down to your hips, his fingers digging in so harshly that by morning sunlight, purple will be painted on your skin but it feels so heavenly that you don’t push them away.
“I love you, not for the protection you provide and for your substantial looks, but for all the small things you do that bear your soul to me.”
Your hands meet around the back of his neck as he carries you by your thighs towards his bed. Pulling at the fabric that keeps him away from you.
“I’ll love you even as you tell me you hate me. I love you enough that I will scour the face of this earth for a place where I can take you away from your nightmares.”
“I-“ He sighs into your lips, completely delighted by the intimacy that only his mind could conjure up in the lone nights. “I love you.”
You move for the buttons of his polo, while he moves to pull your shirt from you. A race that leaves you both fumbling when you feel his hand carving a path against your waist and up to your chest. You are left scalding, tiny bounces of light flickering in your eyes.
“I will be at your string’s end.”
masterlist
#harry potter#theodore nott#theo nott#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#theodore nott fluff#theodore nott angst#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott fanfic#theodore nott fanfiction#slytherin#theodore nott oneshot#theodore nott smut
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no story in our generation is as tragic as merthur like… imagine being merlin. you find out that you were mere pawns in another’s games, and whilst you believed everything you sacrificed was to keep the person you loved most safe, you now realise that your job wasn’t anything more than raising him to be a pig to be slaughtered at the right time. you spent a decade losing everything because the single goal of keeping him safe was more important to you than anything else - than your happiness and your freedom and your life - but not only did you fail, but you find out you were doomed to fail from the start. you kill yourself thinking about all the things you could have done differently to save him, but fate’s cruel joke was that nothing you could ever have done mattered. he had one foot in the grave since the day you met him. you are two sides of the same coin, so he was always supposed to die when he shouldn’t, and you’re doomed to live when he couldn’t.
you can love him, but you can’t keep him.
#fuck romeo and Juliet they are my tragic love story#my Roman Empire#merthur#merlin#bbc merlin#arthur pendragon
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Pt 3 - Always.
Theodore Nott x Reader
Pt 2 here
Summary: The one where the anticipated week long holiday between the friendship group turns into a certified nightmare. Alternatively: You accidentally end up rooming with Theodore.
A/N: WE’VE ENTERED THE HOLIDAY PART AND I CANT WAIT FOR WHERE THIS IS GOING TO GO WOOOOHHH
I promise the angst will eventually subside (eventually.)
REQUESTS ARE OPEN
Songs: I know you - Faye Webster
I wait for you - Alex G
By some miracle, you had all managed to get through the weeks leading up to the summer holidays and were due to travel to Pansy’s family home today. The monotony of pouring over books, frantically rummaging through essays you had written on scrolls of parchment looking for your notes had finally paid off, and exams were done. Pansy had been raving on and on about just how beautiful the quaint villa was (which seemed to be a bit of a juxtaposition) , and how they'd all have a great time. Whilst you did look forward to it, you were reminded of who would be there.
Theodore.
After that conversation in the library, things had gone from worse to even worse. In some cruel twist of fate, you seemed to see Theodore everywhere now, yet his increased presence seemed only to solidify just how much of a gap there was between the two of you.
Spending a week together both seemed terrifying and cruelly humorous. A kind of plot from a shitty rom-com, though you doubted it would turn out for the better.
The once lively (arguably messy) dorm room you shared with Pansy was now barren and bare, your belongings packed away as you waited for Pansy to finish…
Tapping the walls?
“Pans, what on earth are you doing?” You ask, and she continues knocking on random places on the wall, letting out a groan of frustration.
“I swear I had it hidden somewhere! I refuse to let some snotty little 6th-year find it.” She grumbles.
“What the fuck are you looking for? Maybe if you told me it would be a bit easier.” You respond exasperatedly, nearing your wits ends.
“My weed! I kept a stash hidden somewhere when we first came but I've been leeching off Enzo! Now I can't find it!” She huffs, throwing her arms up exasperatedly. You roll your eyes and resist the urge to slap her upside the back of her head.
“You idiot, I packed that away.” You snap, and she furrows her brows.
“What? When?” She says, and you begin to wonder whether you should even bother.
“Merlin Pansy, is your memory that bad? You asked me to take it.” You chide. Her look of confusion merges into a sheepish smile.
“Oh… Thanks!” She says, beaming as she slings her bag over her shoulder.
You resist the urge to roll your eyes for what feels like the umpteenth time as you lug your bags downstairs.
“Finally.” Draco proclaimed, ushering the attention of the group as they looked up to see you and Pansy descending. Blaise immediately goes over to take Pansy's suitcase, and she looks up at him with a bashful smile.
Woah.
What?
You raise a brow, a small smirk tugging at your lips. Lorenzo comes over to help you with your trunks, and he leans closer to you.
“You're seeing it too, right? Smitten with one another.” He whispers.
“Since when? She was flirting with Belby about a week or so ago.” you say, raising a brown.
“Exactly. Notice how Blaise wasn't there? He left for a reason.” Lorenzo gushes, as though you both were 12 and at a sleepover. You giggle lightly.
“Wanna bet on when they'll get together?” You offer, and Lorenzo nods.
“Easy. They're both too damn stubborn to confess so I bet it’ll be after the trip.” He says.
You let out a loud laugh, and they all turn to look at you and Lorenzo. Pansy raises a brow, but you're looking elsewhere. Theodore looks over at you, and how Lorenzo is leaning close to you. He has to tear his eyes away, and he swallows harshly.
It was incredible how one person could change your mood so quickly.
Stupid, really, just how much one person could affect you. You clear your throat and turn back to Lorenzo.
“I bet they'll get together during the trip. 5 Galleons?” You ask, holding out your hand. Lorenzo eyes you suspiciously, then shakes your hand.
“Deal.” He says, and a wicked grin graces your face.
“Great. That means I can do this then.” You say, walking over to Pansy and Blaise.
“Pans, can you be a dear for me? I want to room with Lorenzo, so can you room with Blaise instead please?” You plead.
Blaise raises a brow and Pansy looks at you with a pointed glare
You were helping her (and perhaps yourself).
“Isn’t Loren-” Blaise starts but you quickly cut him off.
“Please, pansy?” You say, your voice strained. You really wanted those 5 galleons. Pansy is nervous but somehow also, you can tell she’s excited. You're probing her onwards, and with a shy smile (Once again, so out of character for her), she accepts.
“Alright- only if you don't mind, Blaise?” She says, looking up at him.
He grins as he looks down at her and you watch the two with an amused look on your face.
Hopeless, really. You give it a day or two before they're together.
“Of course.” He agreed.
Damn, you were good. With a cheeky grin, you turn back to Lorenzo and wiggle your eyebrows. You had the win in the bag. You leave the two and walk back to Lorenzo, grinning as you approach him.
“Don't hate the player, hate the game” You brag, and Lorenzo has to suppress a smile.
“Good Job. You forgot one thing though, sweetheart. I’m sharing a room with Mattheo.” Lorenzo quips, and your expression drops.
“What? Pansy said-” You protest, and Lorenzo laughed.
“Yeah, originally I was sharing a room with Draco. But Draco demanded his own room because he refused to share and Mattheo ended up with me instead.” He continues.
It takes a second for the gears in your head to turn, and then you realise.
If there are 4 bedrooms, and Blaise and Pansy are in one, Mattheo and Lorenzo in the other, Draco on his own in the third, that leaves you and...
Theodore.
You were going to strangle the life out of the greasy blonde-haired git. Damn him and his scrawny little princess ass.
You suddenly feel very sick. Perhaps you should stay in Hogwarts. Summer with Snape sounds riveting now, doesn't it?
You take a deep breath, trying to hide your disappointment, but Lorenzo sees right through you and bursts into laughter.
"Looks like the game just got a whole lot more interesting, huh?" he teases, patting you on the back. You shoot him a mock glare, but inside, you're already plotting how you’ll get through this.
May the heavens above help you.
As you stood outside the, admittedly stunning villa, you began to wonder whether you could brave sleeping outdoors for a week. The old French villa stands gracefully amidst lush gardens and towering trees, exuding an air of timeless elegance. Its weathered façade is adorned with intricate wrought-iron balconies and climbing vines. A cobbled pathway leads to an arched entrance adorned with a rustic wooden door. The entrance is flanked by tall windows with faded shutters, each window framed by ornate carvings that add a touch of sophistication.
As you step inside, the foyer unfolds, grand and established. A winding staircase leads upwards, and you can't even begin to imagine how damn expensive this place was.
The rooms are filled with antique furniture and large windows adorned with heavy curtains that allow dappled sunlight to filter through, casting a warm glow on the Persian rugs that cover the floor.
Nevermind. You could tolerate it.
The group of you stand in the foyer, looking around.
“Well shit…” Mattheo murmurs under his breath, looking around. You agree with him. You couldn't even begin to comprehend how wealthy your friends were. It felt almost alienating, somehow. The rest of them seemed accustomed to such luxuries, it seemed only Mattheo and yourself weren't.
“Right. There are two en suites and two regular rooms. Blaise and I will have the first ensuite, and You and Theodore get the other. It's all the way on the top floor.” Pnays says, and you nod, insides churning at the reminder of having to share a room with Theodore. You don't even turn to look at him.
“How come you two get en suites?” Mattheo complains, and Pansy turns to him, rolling her eyes.
“Because you dimwit, we need privacy for changing. We can't exactly just strip naked in front of Blaise and Theodore.” Pansy pointed out, motioning between yourself and her.
You loved Pansy, you really did, but why did she have to word it like that? You groan internally, shaking your head.
“I'm sure they'll be doing it anyway..” Lorenzo mumbles to you, and you snicker as you look over at Blaise and Pansy. Agreeing to meet downstairs in an hour to order food, you all make your way up to your respective rooms.
You hurl your suitcase up the steps, hyper-aware of Theodore walking just behind you. You climb up the first set of stairs and look up. A solid three more sets to go.
What the hell? 4 floors and 4 bedrooms? What kind of architectural fuck up was this? It seemed now like you had bricks in your bag because the task of getting up those remaining three flights of stairs seemed near impossible.
You pulled out of your mini crisis embarrassingly quick as fingers brushed against yours. You spin around, spotting Theodore. He's reaching down for your bag, and he looks up, eyes meeting yours.
You hated him.
You loved him.
You loathed him.
You didn't know which one mattered more.
“Let me take it.” He offers, clearing his throat, and suddenly you've lost the ability to speak.
You nod in agreement, too caught off guard by the unexpected gesture to form coherent words. Theodore effortlessly lifts the suitcase as if it were weightless, and you watch the play of muscles beneath his shirt as he ascends the staircase with ease.
You berate yourself for being so shameless.
You follow him, trying to shake off the strange mix of emotions swirling within you. Your thoughts are a whirlwind as you reach the landing, now standing just outside the door of your shared room.
"Thanks," you manage to mumble, avoiding eye contact as Theodore sets your suitcase down inside the room. He nods in acknowledgement, his expression unreadable.
As you enter the room, you're greeted by a quaint and cosy little room. Luckily, there are two separate beds, though they are pushed together to form one larger one. You'll be sure to move them apart.
Theodore clears his throat, breaking the silence. "I guess this is our room for the trip," he remarks, a half-smile playing on his lips.
"Yeah," you reply, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt. The air between you two is charged with unspoken tension, and the weight of the realisation settles in. Fate, it seems, had a peculiar sense of humour.
"Listen, about earlier," Theodore starts, his gaze searching yours, but you cut him off swiftly.
“Don’t. There's nothing to talk about.” You say, brushing past him as you walk into the room. You have your back faced to him, face bright red as you begin unpacking, actions more forceful than you intended them to be.
Theodore remains silent for a moment, respecting your need for space. You can feel the weight of his gaze on you as you unpack, each movement deliberate and almost aggressive.
You hear Theodore take a deep breath behind you, and then he speaks, his voice breaking, tinged with an underlying vulnerability. "Please. Just, look at me." He pleads.
You clench your jaw, your hands gripping the edges of your suitcase. You turn around, meeting his gaze with a steely expression.
You swear your heart breaks. He’s frowning, and he looks on the verge of tears.
Stupid. This was so, so stupid.
“Look. Nothing is going on. Nothing happened, ok? I'm fine.” You say, though it's a blatant lie. You grab your sweater and book, considering pushing past him again on your way out as you speak.
You don't want to carry on like this. It hurt.
“Yeah, sure," Theodore replies, his voice now strained and forced into an artificial calm. "Nothing happened."
You want to believe it, to believe that you can bury the complicated mess of emotions that surged to the surface earlier. As you step into the hallway, you take a deep breath, plastering a fake smile on your face.
Theodore follows suit, and together you make your way downstairs to join the others. The air is thick with tension, but the group seems oblivious, immersed in arguments over food.
Pansy looks at you curiously, her keen eyes noting the shift in dynamics, but she chooses not to pry. Blaise seems absorbed in his thoughts, Lorenzo is engaged in animated conversation with Mattheo, and Draco appears indifferent to the subtle changes in the atmosphere.
No one notices anything, and you're very convinced it's because nothing really existed in the first place. You walk over to where Matteho is sitting on the sofa and take a seat next to him. He wraps an arm around you, drawing you in close as he continues speaking to Lorenzo.
“Hey, stimp.” Mattheo says, rubbing your arm as he looks down at you.
Sidenote: The nickname stimp originated from when Pansy had gone through a phase of calling everyone ‘stink’. You had no idea what she was saying and thought she was calling everyone stimp. You were relentlessly tormented by the group for thinking so, and it's stuck since then (courtesy of Mattheo.)
“Hey.” You mumble into his chest. He chuckles, fiddling with your hair lightly as he goes back to his conversation with Lorenzo.
Your mind (as it so often did) lingers back to Theodore. Your stomach aches because of it.
He's a tempest, a tempest that lingers in the recesses of your soul, tearing through the tranquillity with an unrelenting force.
You're weary, though these past few days with Theodore have made you constantly feel that way. You become tuned out from the conversations of your friends, feeling oddly like a spectator.
Your eyes grow heavy, and whether it's to your dismay or relief, you fall asleep with Theodore on your mind.
You could have sworn you fell asleep in the living room, curled into Mattheo. So when your eyes flicker open, and you're blinking wearily, sitting up in your bed, you're heavily disoriented.
A sleepy groan escapes your lips as you gingerly sit up, looking around. Theodore is lying in his bed, and you're very quickly aware of the fact that he separated them.
His eyes flicker over to yours at the sound of you stirring, a book loosely held in his hands.
Your eyes flicker down to the cover of the book and you're surprised at how quickly you feel sick again. It was getting rather tiring, really.
How long was he reading for? Was he thinking of you as he read? Did he read and look over at you?
“I saved some food for you.” He says after a beat. He looks at you, as though he wants to say more, and you see the conflict in his mind. He looks back down, and you feel slightly disappointed.
“Thanks.” You croak quietly, gingerly slipping out of bed. You sit on the edge for a second, back facing Theodore as you orient yourself for a bit before you slide on some slippers. You yawn and get up, tossing the covers back as you make your way downstairs. You blindly grope the walls as you warily descend the stairs in the pitch-black darkness, praying you didn't send yourself tumbling down.
Your fingers brush against a light switch and you let out a small sigh of relief as you flick the lights on.
God, how late was it?
You finally manage to stumble into the kitchen, the warm lights illuminating the otherwise barren place. The house is silent, and you assume it must be very late, judging by the way your friends (who almost exclusively lived between the hours of 11:00 - 02:00) were not awake. You shouldn't be eating at this time, especially because you planned to sleep right after, but you were starving and hadn't eaten prior.
You open what you assume to be the fridge (because god forbid rich people be like the rest of us and have normal-looking things), and see two small containers and a pizza box. You're impressed Draco (who though incredibly slender seemed to have the appetite of a growing giant) hadn't eaten it yet. You open the pizza box first and feel immediately better when you see the order. It's exactly what you like, there's garlic butter on the crust, and olives on every slice. There are tomatoes but it's on the side because you hate cooked tomatoes, and there's your favourite sauce as well (Blaise almost cried bloody murder when he saw you dipping your pizza in mayo a few years ago. You swore it was good.)
With a small smile on your face, you peer into the other two containers. One is full of strawberries, and your mouth waters.
You absolutely adored strawberries, and these looked plump and fresh, a far cry from the sad little things you'd get in Hogsmeade, on rare occasions. You can't resist biting into one and letting out a small groan of satisfaction as you do.
This had to be what heaven felt like, surely. You swore these alone could make you ascend. You pull out the container and snack on some, looking up as you hear the sound of footsteps approaching. Pansy yawns as she saunters into the kitchen, rubbing her eyes. She's evidently sleepy, reaching for a glass of water as she speaks.
“You're finally up.” She mumbles groggily, leaning against the counter.
You nod.
“Woke up a few minutes ago. Thank you for ordering some pizza for me. You got it spot on.” You say with a small smile, and Pansy dismisses you with a small flick of her hand, as she sets the glass down.
“Oh no no, it wasn't me. We all ordered some sushi because Blaise knew a place. Theodore went out and got all that for you. He disappeared for like three bloody hours and we thought he got kidnapped or something. Turns out it’s very hard to find a good pizza place here.” Pansy says.
You blink in surprise at Pansy’s revelation. You have to stop yourself from dropping your jaw because you couldn't deal with her question right now, especially because…
What the fuck?
Why? How?
Why?
You can barely comprehend Theodore could remember all those things about you. Little things that you yourself wouldn't even notice. By the looks of it even your closest friend, Pansy, didn't even know that.
He went out of his way to get that for you?
It's an odd mixture of emotions — appreciation, confusion, and a tinge of frustration. Frustration because he was being so damn confusing. Ignoring you but then knowing everything about you. Not talking to you and then confessing he's been searching for you in everything he does. Remaining distant but doing things that made your heart flutter and guilt flood your being.
Pansy is watching you intently, ever observant. She gives you a once over, eyebrows furrowing ever so lightly.
“Night then.” She says, turning back to go to her room.
Even Pansy, who was ever known for being careless and prying, knew right now that this was something that went so much further than her best friend having a silly crush on someone. She didn’t need to know the history between you and Theodore to know this was something serious, and her reserved and understanding behaviour only seemed to scare you more. You remain staring off for a second as she retreats before you close the container, slipping it back into the fridge
(You'd hex Draco's teeth onto his toes if he dared to touch them.)
You make your way back up to your room, and by the time you enter Theodore is no longer reading, rather he's asleep in his bed.
His bedside lamp is off, but yours is on. You look at him for a second, and you're grateful that he's asleep because you didn't know what to say, or how to face him. You quietly retreat into the bathroom, washing your face and brushing your teeth before slipping back into the bedroom. You slip under the covers of your bed, tugging the blanket over you as you sink into the infuriatingly comfy mattress (How you'd be able to find sleep again back at Hogwarts after this, you never knew. This made your dorm bed feel like you were sleeping on a slab of concrete. If this home isn't being used by Pansy and her family till the holiday, you seriously considered breaking in and living here in the meantime.)
You and Theo are sleeping on opposite sides of the room, backs facing away from one another. Your bed is facing the window, which you're glad about because you couldn't sleep otherwise. A small voice in your mind questions if that was Theodore’s doing as well.
The silence is broken as you speak, words you only dare to utter because Theodore is asleep.
“Thank you.” You whisper, quietly.
Silence follows, and you let out a small breath because, of course, there's silence, Theodore is asleep. You find your own eyes drifting shut very quickly, slipping away into sleep.
You feel as though you're sinking, and you can't tell if it's because you're tired or spiralling.
In the quiet darkness, you find yourself teetering on the cusp of sleep. You're in that nearly there phase, where you feel simultaneously weightless and heavy. You're half-conscious, dreams blurring the line of reality. You're drifting away, and you swear you hear a whisper, gentle and barely audible in a voice that sounds very similar to Theodore.
"Always."
@camille-1019
#harry potter#slytherin#slytherin boys#tom riddle#theo#theodore nott x you#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott angst#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott fic#lorenzo berkshire#slytherin boys fic#draco malfoy#mattheo riddle#pansy parkinson
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Hear me out before you start to throw stones, but with the past events in the Rise of Red having the Queen of Hearts and Cinderella as friends, there is a chance that the film might get people to ship Bridget and Ella. I'm just saying it now to get it out in the open, as well as having "Bridgella" as a place holder when coming up with a ship title. People have already considered shipping their daughters together. Along with comparing Bridget and Ella with Sophie and Agatha from The School for Good and Evil.
There are theories that Bridget's path to villainy started after something got her and Ella to end their friendship. I wouldn't put it past Uliana for breaking up their friendships for kicks. If you remember, Ella looked like she wanted to get back at Uliana for bullying her friend. So that is one possibly, with the trailer subjecting that Uliana is the reason Bridget goes bad, but there might be more to the story. Like Ella's step family possibly destroying her friendship with the Wonderland princess, we all saw how they reacted to her catching the eye of a prince. Who's to say that they didn't want to prevent Bridget coming to her friend's aid, like taking her away from her cruel step family and giving her better life in Wonderland.
Descendants has a similar theme to Ever After High, subjecting that some point during their time at Merlin Academy the two are told what their future paths are. Ella is to be a heroin known as Cinderella and Bridget is fated to be the villain who goes by the Queen of Hearts. If you recall how quick the Fairy Godmother was to say "No" when Uma mentions Wonderland, it subjects that she might know what happened between them. With Fairy Godmother's teenage self, Fay, also being a student at MA, and how both she and Ella were destined to be part of the same story. Even those who are seen as a good have done something bad in their past, like Fay possibly worrying or was told that Ella's friendship with Bridget might have led Ella a stray and prevent Fay from fulfilling in her future role.
But those are just my theories, as we have to wait for the film to come out to get our answers. Please be kind to this collage and ship, if you have nothing nice to say about it keep it you yourselves. After all, I have seen people ship Maleficent with Cinderella and Belle.
#collage#shipping#disney collage#descendants#disney descendants#descendants disney#the rise of red#descendants rise of red#disney cinderella#cinderella#descendants cinderella#queen of hearts#descendants queen of hearts#descendants ella#ella#bridget#descendants bridget#bridget x ella#ella x bridget#bridgella#descendants 4#rise of red#descendants collage#descendants the rise of red#femslash
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When Arthur was crowned the King of Camelot, and Merlin the royal consort immediately after, it was only normal for the servants to expect one of them to be assigned to the newly titled consort. After all, what is a royal without a servant?
However, months pass without a new assignment and switches in positions, and the entire castle is left more or less confused when Merlin can still be seen picking up tomatoes from the market, and sweeping up floors while humming a tune.
Because not only has the new royal consort not been assigned a servant, he is still acting as a servant.
When asked why he's still doing duties of a lowly servant, Merlin simply answers with how he likes doing the work.
But that obviously can't be true with his continuous grumbles about filling up the bath, or murmurs about how stupid clotpole should just learn how to shine his own bloody armour, so Camelot soon becomes ripe with theories.
Tragic tales of abandonment, sly murmurs of infidelity, and cruel narratives of betrayal and anger, all begin emerging.
Whispers begin to spread in the kitchens about the indignities that Merlin must have committed to be faced with such a fate as a royal. Young maids gossip about possible affairs Merlin is having with one of the knights, and rumours pass from stall to stall in the markets on how the king has already grown sick of the new consort, and has simply distanced himself by quietly assigning Merlin back to his previous duties.
After all, Merlin was the king's manservant before he was his consort. And kings are never serious with servants.
Time pass. Arthur never acknowledges the rumours, and Merlin simply answers with the same answer every time he is asked the question of why. And without fuel for the fire, the people and their whispers soon calm.
Then, on one fateful morning, as the king and the royal consort return from their hunting trip, the consort's boot falls off.
The crowd can only watch in shock as, seemingly by reflex, Arthur Pendragon—The King of Camelot, ruler of Albion—kneels at his consort's feet, and begin putting his boot back on.
He murmurs something about Merlin being careless and dimwitted, and yet still cradles the back of Merlin's ankle as he ties the laces of the boot. He then promptly gets up, and simply walks into the castle with Merlin behind him like nothing had happened.
The crowd explodes into noise.
In the king's chambers, the door is shut behind them before Merlin asks:
"What was that?"
"That, was so that they know I'm actually a great husband who doesn't mistreat you, and you're just a stubborn idiot who like complaining about things you asked to do."
A laugh echoes through the room.
"You love me."
".... Go away."
And with that, rumours about the king and his royal consort never appeared in Camelot again.
#hey look i can write happy stuff#all be it not very well#merlin#merlin bbc#merlin emrys#merlin x arthur#arthur x merlin#arthur pendragon#merthurweek2022#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin/arthur#arthur#oneshot#ficlet#my writing#my posts
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Headcanon: The fate had always been cruel to Merlin. The fate's main goal in creating Merlin was for him to make Albion great and to make Arthur ‘the once and future king’ with the power of magic.
So, the fate killed anyone who could have threatened Merlin's devotion or love for Arthur. Like Will, his attachment to his old life, Freya, the one he wished to ignore destiny for and run away with, or even Lancelot, whom he trusted the most, even more than Arthur at times. The fate cannot risk him loving anyone more than Authur, that would distract him from his duty. So it twisted his destiny, and made Arthur the only reason for Merlin to keep living.
But it backfired because Merlin grew to love Arthur more than Albion. The love prevented him from making the right decisions for Albion, because he always put Arthur first, even before his other duty, before Albion's greatness and the world. He denied his own magic or even his people, because he thought that was the best way to protect Arthur and to stay by his side. Because more than Emrys the Great who would lead Arthur to become the greatest king, he was just Merlin. Merlin who was stupidly loyal to Arthur and just wanted Arthur to be safe and happy, king or not.
In the end, the fate realised that Merlin would fail to unite Albion, and Camelot would eventually fall, partly because of his mistakes made by his twisted devotion and unbearable love for Arthur.
So, the fate took Arthur away from him as a punishment.
#merthur#murther#bbc merlin#merlin#rambling#merlin headcanons#arthur pendragon#mercelot#freya#bbc arthur#merlin bbc#the fate wanted Arthur to unite Albion#but other than that the fate did not care about Arthur#but merlin cared and that is why their plan fail because merlin love arthur as arthus not as once and future king#merlin fanfic idea#merlin angst#meta#merlin meta#my post
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Tessomancy at Madam Puddifoot's (Tea-Sons Greetings)
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Frankly, I was 'bit' disappointed with the "study" session with Cassandra in Madam Puddifoot's tea shop in the last update, so I decided to do something about it. So, this chapter is for those who feel the same way
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Winter had settled over Hogwarts that morning, casting the castle in an enchanting blanket of snow. As the chilly winds whispered through the halls, you and your classmates found yourselves in the Divination classroom that looked more like a cross between someone's attic and an old-fashioned tea shop. Everything was illuminated by a soft, crimson glow; the numerous lamps were covered in scarves of dark red, and the curtains were drawn at the windows. It was oppressively warm, and the fire behind the packed mantelpiece was heating a big copper kettle while emitting a thick, nauseating kind of incense.
Professor Trelawney, draped in flowing fabrics, looked around the room with her usual far-off gaze as she seated herself in a winged armchair in the center of the room.
"Now, my dear students," she began, her voice a melodic, misty murmur, "In the ethereal dance of destiny, we shall embark on a Tessomancy project. The patterns in the dregs of the tea leaves shall unveil secrets yet unknown to you as you gaze into the future! I have already divined the pairs through my Inner Eye, and it has whispered its choices to me."
The class listened intently as Trelawney listed the pairs, connecting students in mysterious ways only she understood, pairing students who are more than likely come to blows or heated duels before they could even have a sip of their tea to read their tea leaves. Case in point: Fischer being partnered up with Daniel (who already had his wand out, just in case), and Colby being partnered up with Ivy. Your other friends, Lottie, Kevin, and Robyn, were not safe from this either, with Robyn being paired up with a quidditch-hating, know-it-all attitude Ravenclaw, Kevin being paired up with a thrill-seeking and daredevil Gryffindor, and Lottie with a disinterested Slytherin.
For each partner she called, she instructed them to take a seat beside their partners
You, on the other hand, are desperately pleading, praying even, to Merlin and whatever wizarding gods you know to spare you from this fate.
"Cassandra Vole and (Y/N) (L/N)," Trelawney declared, her eyes glazing over as if peering into the mystical threads of fate.
Alas, fate is cruel and has some twisted sense of humor it seems.
You suddenly felt your jaw drop out of disbelief. Daniel, Robyn, Kevin, did the same, while Ivy and Lottie had their hands over their mouth. The rest of the class exchanged glances started murmuring amongst themselves, surprised by the seemingly unlikely pairing. Cassandra Vole, known for her sharp wit and vain attitude, and you, a student whose path (and wand) often crossed with hers. The air seemed to crackle with a blend of anticipation and uncertainty.
After quickly composing yourself, you hesitantly made your way to Cassandra's side, she offered no more than a subtle nod of acknowledgment, before turning away in a huff, leaving you rubbing your nape awkwardly as Trelawney began partnering up the rest of the class. The unspoken understanding was that this was merely an academic collaboration, a project to be completed, and nothing more. You knew this as Professor Trelawney began spending the entire lecture on giving instructions on what to do for the project, expecting a report on their findings before the end of the week.
Looks like you've got your work cut for you, it seems.
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In the few short hours that followed, whispers of the Tessomancy project spread throughout the castle like fiendfyre. Students discussed with their partners and speculated on the outcomes of their readings. Rumors circulated that Professor Trelawney's divination insights had paired students who, under normal circumstances, might never have worked together, thus they were all bound to fail. You and your friends were, of course, aware of this as you sat in the Great Hall for lunch to discuss the project.
Daniel, who sat beside you, sighed and shook his head, playing with his beans for lunch, his elbow against the table, his head propped up with his hand. "I don't know if Trelawney is trying to deliberately make us fail her class—"
"—or she's just being mental and loony as usual," Robyn interjected, her face flushing from anger after some sort of disagreement with her partner for the project, no doubt it's about the Ravenclaw talking Robyn's ear off for the project.
"Well, knowing Professor Trelawney, it's probably a bit of both." Lottie added as she joined the table, looking a bit disheveled. Looks she too had some disagreement with her partner regarding the project. "She thrives on making everything unnecessarily complicated."
"Complicated is an understatement." Kevin grumbled, "My partner won't stop talking about the alignment of the skies and how it correlates with the steam rising from her tea. I swear, I might need to invest in earplugs if this keeps going for the whole week."
Amused groans and laughs resonated across the table as they shared in the collective struggle that was the Tessomancy project. Amidst the banter, a curious expression crossed Daniel's face as he noticed you being silent throughout, completely immersed in your own thoughts, no doubt worried about your partnership with Slytherin's vain 'Princess'.
Truth to be told, you had harbored a small crush on Cassandra since your first day at Hogwarts, a crush that quickly waned as you witnessed her... less pleasant qualities. Still, you couldn't deny the charm she exudes—confident, clever, stylish, and powerful. And, of course, incredibly beautiful.
It wasn't that you despised her; you didn't hate anyone. You simply didn't appreciate how badly she treated your friends whenever the opportunity arose. Dealing with bullies had been challenging enough at your previous muggle school, and it was no easier at a magical school like Hogwarts. But you believed in standing up to bullies, no matter who they were.
"Speaking of which, how's your partnership with Cassandra going for you, (Y/N)?" he inquired, snapping you out of your stupor, his eyebrows raised in anticipation.
Robyn, who had been in a bad mood, suddenly perked up, her interest piqued. "Yeah, spill the tea—no pun intended. How's the dynamic between you two?"
While your friends giggled at Robyn's comedic wording, you merely sighed, running a hand through your hair. "Nothing. She just told me to wait for her owl to give me the specifics on when we'll start."
As if on cue, a loud screech from the ceiling caught your attention. You looked up, and a majestic snowy white owl suddenly swooped in, landing gracefully in front of you. Its beak carried a small, emerald-green envelope.
You regarded the owl with a mixture of surprise and apprehension. Taking a deep breath, you reached out, careful not to startle the elegant creature. It was evident whose owl this was, given its immaculate grooming. Cassandra's owl extended its head, presenting the emerald-green envelope, and the Slytherin crest embossed on the seal confirmed its sender. You gently nuzzled the owl and offered a meaty piece of your lunch before it gracefully took flight back to its owner.
"Well, open it!" Robyn exclaimed, her impatience matching the curious glances from your friends.
You examined the envelope, turning it over to see something written that said, "For YOUR eyes only."
Giving your friends a knowing look, they relented, granting you the privacy to explore the contents of the letter. After carefully breaking the wax seal and unfolding the parchment inside, Cassandra's elegant handwriting adorned the small page.
"(Y/N), Meet me at Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop at 3 in the afternoon. Don't be late. AND DON'T TELL ANYONE. -C.V."
The simplicity of the message struck you. No pleasantries, no unnecessary words. Just a direct command.
"Well? What did the letter say?" Ivy asked inquisitively, already finished with her lunch.
"Can't say, really," you replied, deciding to respect Cassandra's wishes regarding the letter.
Your friends raised their eyebrows at this, looking rather unconvinced, and seemed to assume more than they let on.
"Well, whatever it is," Robyn couldn't resist a teasing remark. "Looks like you've got a date with destiny, (Y/N)."
"More like a date with academic disaster," you mumbled, shaking your head.
The rest of your lunch passed with a mix of laughter and speculations about the mysterious rendezvous. As the appointed time approached, you couldn't help but wonder why Cassandra would pick Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop of all places to meet. The air was thick with anticipation, and you knew that whatever awaited you there would undoubtedly be intriguing, given the circumstances.
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The remainder of the afternoon crawled by, every hour marked by the anticipation of the looming meeting with Cassandra. You couldn't help but wonder about the purpose of this rendezvous. Was it solely for the Tessomancy project, or did Cassandra have something else in mind? The mystery surrounding her intentions hung in the air like an enchantment.
As the clock hands finally converged at 3 o'clock, you made your way to Hogsmeade and straight Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop, a place usually associated with romantic rendezvous. As such you made none of your friends followed you on the way.
Upon arriving, the village of Hogsmeade bustled with activity, students roaming the cobblestone streets, their laughter and chatter intermingling with the magical atmosphere. The quaint tea shop exuded a warm glow, its windows adorned with delicate pink lace curtains and stacked teacups.
Upon entering, the aroma of various teas wafted through the air, creating an atmosphere of coziness. The interior was adorned with pink floral patterns, and small, intricately decorated tables were scattered around the room. You spotted Cassandra at a corner table, her posture composed and her expression already reflecting her disdain for the environment.
"There you are. Took you long enough," Cassandra remarked, her tone cutting through the air. "Well, don't just stand there! Sit down so we can get this over with."
You complied, taking a seat across from her in the flowery and frilly atmosphere of the tea shop. Madam Puddifoot approached with a beaming smile, eager to serve her special Couple's Special tea.
"Welcome to Madam Puddifoot's, bringing people together one cuppa at a time. Can I interest you dears in our Couple's Special?" Madam Puddifoot offered, her eyes glinting with a spark of matchmaking enthusiasm.
"Err, that's okay. Two cups of Earl Grey would be fine," you replied, preemptively dispelling any misconceptions.
"Are you sure? Our strawberry rose tea is made with an infusion of hibiscus blossoms and rose petals. It's sweet, floral, and ever so romantic," Madam Puddifoot persisted.
"Let me make this very clear," Cassandra interjected sharply, "This is not a date. The only reason I'm here with (Y/N) is because Trelawney assigned us as partners on a Tessomancy project. And the tea the Hogwarts house-elves make is vile."
"Very well, two cups of Earl Grey coming right up." Madam Puddifoot, though a bit disappointed, nodded understandingly and left to prepare the ordered Earl Grey.
"Finally. Now let's hurry up and do this stupid reading before anyone we know sees me with you. I'll go first, naturally," Cassandra declared, her impatience palpable. "I'll take a drink and tell you what I see in my tea leaves. You interpret what I say and make a prediction."
As soon as Madam Puddifoot arrived with the tea, Cassandra wasted no time. She expertly took her cup, blowing on the piping hot liquid to cool it down, and sipped until only the dregs remained. Following the instructions provided by Professor Trelawney on scroll of parchment you had on you, Cassandra swills the dregs inside her cup three times with the left hand, then turns the cup upside down on its saucer, waiting for the last of the tea to drain away.
Meanwhile, you frantically rummaged through your satchel, realizing with a sinking feeling that you had forgotten your copy of Unfogging the Future—the key reference for the Tessomancy project. Cassandra, noticing your mild panic, merely rolls her eye at you as she decides to give you her copy, sliding it across the table to you, all the while chastising you for being forgetful.
As the last of the tea drained from Cassandra's cup, the two of you finally began the Tessomancy project in earnest.
"Right," said Cassandra as you opened her book at pages five and six. "So, this blob looks like... an acorn?"
"I think that means..." You consulted Unfogging the Future, tracing you finger on the printed words. "You can expect a windfall of riches in your future."
"Really? Not that I'm surprised. It is the natural outcome, after all, for one as gifted and intelligent as myself." Cassandra replied, a hint of smugness in her tone. "In fact, you'd better pour me another cup. My future's too full of potential for one to be sufficient."
"But—"
Before you could even protest, Cassandra had ordered another two cups of Earl Grey from Madam Puddifoot. The process repeated, with Cassandra going through the same swilling and draining ritual as before. You just sighed at this as you held the textbook reference you had in front of you as Cassandra began peering into her drained cup.
Now I see... a cat? " Cassandra's brow furrowed as she scrutinized her teacup, turning it around as if seeking a better angle to decipher the dregs. "No, a dog? No... both?"
"That's an easy one," you responded confidently, scanning the pages of Unfogging the Future. "You're going to... develop an unlikely relationship with a polar opposite. In, other words, someone you wouldn't expect to get along with. Well, what do you think? Ring any bells?"
Cassandra's gaze shifted from the teacup to you, her skepticism evident, before she finally, ever composed, merely raised an eyebrow.
"It seems the pink and frills have gone to your head," she remarked dryly. "Well, I've had quite enough of this for one day. You can go ahead and leave first."
"But what about my reading?" You interjected.
"I don't have to look at your tea leaves to know what the future has in store for you, do I?"
Intrigued, you prodded, "Oh, really? And what's that?"
Cassandra leaned back, a knowing glint in her eyes, her gloved hand raised near her mouth, stifling a giggle. "A failing grade in Divination."
"Oh, har har. Very Funny." You rolled your eyes at her, "And I'm not leaving my seat until you predict my future, Cassandra."
The air between you and Cassandra crackled with tension, a silent challenge passing between your eyes. The ambient sounds of the tea shop faded away as the world narrowed down to the space between the two of you.
The seconds stretched into moments, and the bustling sounds of the tea shop became distant echoes. It was a peculiar tableau, the two of you engaged in a duel of gazes, oblivious to the curious glances from other patrons.
Her gaze was like a storm, intense and unyielding. Dark emerald eyes bore into yours with a sharpness that cut through the awkward silence. It was a contest of wills, a battle communicated through the language of stares. You, on the other hand, maintained a composed exterior, though the undercurrent of nervousness rippled beneath the surface. The challenge was set, and neither of you seemed willing to be the first to look away.
Cassandra's raised eyebrow suggested amusement, as if she found the situation more entertaining than inconvenient. Finally, Cassandra's lips curled into a half-smile, a subtle acknowledgment of the unspoken exchange.
"You're stubborn, I'll give you that. But fine." She flicks her golden blonde hair over her shoulder and sits closely to the table. "Hand me that stupid book," she declared, her words carrying a blend of irritation and amusement, "so I can predict your stupid cup and be done with this!"
In response, you acquiesced silently, sliding Unfogging the Future in her direction. Cassandra seized it without hesitation, her deft gloved fingers flipping through its pages with practiced efficiency. The sound of parchment rustling punctuated the air as she reached the designated pages, her focus shifting from annoyance to analytical determination.
Fortunately, you already have your tea cup prepared so it was a matter of just discerning the dregs.
"So? What do you see?" Cassandra impatiently asked.
"I see..." Your eyes narrowed with effort as you scrutinized the dainty cup. "Some sort of... thin bird? No, wait. Those lines on the edge of the wings continue, forming into some sort of a.... heart? A perfect heart."
Cassandra felt her breath hitch in her throat, and her cheeks warmed slightly before she composed herself almost instantaneously.
She then sighed rather dramatically, pinching the bridge of her nose. "It really does look like the frills and pink went to your head this time, (Y/N)."
"Hey, I'm just telling you as I see it!"
"Well, you clearly need to get your Inner Eye checked," Cassandra rolled her eyes, clearly not amused. "Why don't you go and order us some food from Madam Puddifoot, while I try to make peace with your cup. This whole ordeal is making me famished."
Deciding not to irk the Slytherin girl any further, you gracefully made your way to Madam Puddifoot's to order more tea and some food this time. Meanwhile, Cassandra seized your cup, examining the tea dregs herself. Imagine her surprise when she found out the dregs truly did resemble a heart.
The only difference was you had described it as perfect, but in her 'Eye,' it appeared crooked and blemished. Confused, she consulted "Unfogging the Future" and leafed through its pages until she found what she was looking for.
There were two drawings of a heart, one crooked and one perfectly shaped. The descriptions read: The perfectly shaped heart appears only to the owner of the cup, symbolizing a love that is harmonious and destined to be in his future. When one discerns the heart in its blemished form, crooked in any way, it signifies the fickle love or admiration they hold for the owner of the cup.
Cassandra nearly dropped the cup from utter surprise after reading the last passage from the book. Her eyes widened, and she looked from the cup to the book, realization slowly dawning upon her. The revelation left her in a momentary state of contemplation before she glanced up, meeting your gaze with an unreadable expression.
Returning with the ordered tea and food, you noticed Cassandra's thoughtful demeanor.
"Everything okay?" you asked, unaware of the revelations unfolding in the tea leaves and the pages of the divination book.
Upon speculation, maybe it's because of the fact you had saved her life on different occasions, especially during your nightly excursions in the Forbidden Forest for rare potion ingredients for some project, or maybe because you were the only partner she'd choose during your dance club practices. In fact, Cassandra can’t remember a time in the past few years you and her haven’t been dance partners. And when you asked her about it, she merely responded by saying you were the only one that did not have two left feet.
Whereas other students would praise her and practically throw themselves at her feet begging for her attention, you were the only one who treated her as a fellow student, and she seemed to have grown to admire that in you. Something she'd never openly admit to anyone. Especially to you.
"Yes, everything's fine." Cassandra blinked, snapping out of her introspection.
Upon setting the tray down, you sat back down and helped yourself to another helping of Earl Grey Tea as well as a fresh macaron from the tray. As you observed her, you couldn't help but marvel at the way her usually composed exterior seemed to waver ever so slightly.
"So," you started, trying to break the silence that had settled over the table, "What did your Inner Eye see from my cup?"
"A load of soggy brown stuff," Cassandra replied with a rather unnerving and sickeningly sweet smile.
One you'd wish to never see again, nor ask Cassandra ever again regarding what she saw in your cup.
#hp magic awakened#cassandra vole#hpma mc#cassandra vole x reader#cassandra vole x mc#hpma cassandra#harry potter#hp fanfic#harry potter magic awakened#cassandra x mc
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A misconception about Adventures of Merlin (specifically, about Uther)
I had a epifany lately regarding Adventures of Merlin. Everyone is giving Uther a hard time for his treatment of magic, yet it struck me:
He isn't that BAD as it seems.
NO, NO, HEAR ME OUT
He is ruthless, cruel and hatefull classist, also hypocritical for seeking magics help when it was about someone from his family. What I get at, that's not what made him unique inside the world builded in the show. Let's call up some trivia facts.
Merlin knows better than to admit he has magic, even tho he lived all his live outside of Camelot's kingdom (he doesn't do a great job at it, but you get my point, he knew he can't show his magic). And it wasn't because of the execution he witnessed at his arrival. It shocked him, but didn't suprise him. He never question it later.
With-hunter doesn't live in Camelot. He came when Uther called for him. He must have doing his business elsewhere.
Headhunter that brought Freya to Camelot never specified where he caught her. He brought her to Camelot, because Uther payed.
No other kingdom used magic in the open. And it wasn't exacly because of Uther, he was respected, but Camelot wasn't an empire dicating rules for everyone else. It was one of many states present.
Uther was hella respected among other kings, one of the reasons being, he conquered Camelot which was ruled by magic before his rulership.
That shows us, when we look, Uther wasn't a source of hate towards magic. Camelot was known for it's ruthless laws against it, but we never hear about a kingdom, where sorcerors and sorceres are free to practice. Best we've seen were individuals allowed to practice magic as long as it served the kings business. Uther was just a representative of the believe, a leader of a nation that didn't want magic. There was a backstory to it, magic brought Arthur to life, but took Uther's wife. Except, that only made him hate magic more. If it had started the hate itself, Camelot would have to rule over everyone else in order to enforce no magic laws outside it's borders as other Kings wouldn't be so kean to stop magicians from healing people and bringing better harvests every year. Also kings would definitelly treat him very differently thruout the show, kissing his ring and bowing before him, not sit down with him to negotiate the fates of kingdoms.
Uther was bad, but the misconception is that, he is the unique villain inside Merlin's world, while he was just the best at doing what everyone else did as well. Opressing people with gift of magic.
I wrote it partly because it strucked me, but partly because I saw a post hating Uther. Don't get me wrong, he was usually despicable tyrant. But he wasn't always a villain. There were at least phew instances, when he showed he cared for other people, he was very generous for his people, he was a great and smart leader and for last, correct me if I'm wrong, a lot of magical trouble Merlin had to overcome was not tied to any revenge on Uther, just evil people using magic for their own benefit. And that's why he is one of my favourite characters to ever grace the screen. He was a really complex character that just so happened to be in the wrong more than in the right and had his flaws dominate his virtues.
I'm planning to pull a series of posts about hated characters, presenting new perspectives and examples of characters that aren't beloved by everyone, stick with me if you want to see more. Definitelly gonna touch on more magical characters.
#adventures of merlin#merlin emrys#bbc merlin#merlin rewatch#arthur pendragon#uther pendragon#merlin meta#camelot#just my ramblings#anthony head
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A Coward Kills With a Kiss
Cw: murder, incest, infidelity, trauma, blood, period accurate behaviors regarding marriage, infidelity and lower class people and Aemond being book!Aemond.
Rated M
This isn't done with any hate towards Alys or Alysmond, this is just me exploring the Aemond cheats trope in an dark and angsty way.
The war wasn’t kind to anyone, least of all to her.
Her brother had been murdered by her husband when his resentment and anger led Vhagar to attack Luke, Aemma had learned that no matter how her visions plague her no one fucking listens and worst of all, that you cannot expect people to give you the loyalty you give them in return.
Aemond had promised eternal love to her, wed her despite his mother’s intent to drive them apart and she’d given him a son hoping that blood would be enough to stay the swords that came flying out after his father’s death.
Aemond who was made for her as she was made for him, who loved her since they were small children and wed her with fire and blood so that if they die in the war they reincarnate as lovers in their next lifetime.
But it was not enough.
She was not enough.
Harwin’s bastard sister, Alys, had become his paramour, impregnated her and worse still, he treated her as if he loved her.
That night Aemma wished he’d die in his duel with Daemon as she cried into her pillow.
But he did not die.
Vhagar died from her wounds, but Aemond managed to get himself loose and toss Daemon off him as their dragons fell into the Gods’ Eye.
Silverwing was the last of the castle dragons unless you counted Rhaena’s hatchling, and the egg little Aemon had been given by his father before he was even born.
They marched to Kingslanding expecting a hero’s welcome, thinking she’d be foolish enough to allow him inside with his whore and his bastard in tow.
But he was wrong, everyone who believed her a foolish little girl would be proven wrong.
“Have Prince Aemond allowed inside the city, but not his whore.” Aemma ordered and eschewed Queen Alysanne’s crown in favor of the one Queen Visenya wore.
She had Aegon the Conqueror’s Crown, but it was not meant for her as was the one her mother and grandsire inherited from Jaehaerys.
This was a new dynasty, after all Aemma was born a Velaryon with dark eyes and dark skin of the Merlin King’s daughter, Melusine and the silvery hair of Raemond the Valyrian, the first King of Driftmark.
She was as much a dragon as she was a sea horse, something even her husband forgot.
Aemma supposed they were all long overdue a reminder.
While he has come to love Alys and owes his life to her, the sight of Kingslanding is enough to remind him where his priorities stand.
And when the orders came that Alys be forbidden to enter the city, Aemond didn’t hesitate to obey knowing his true family was the one inside the walls not outside of it.
The witch knew he would never marry her and the babe ---if it’s born at all given her age and history--- would be a bastard sent to the Wall, to the Faith or the Citadel where he wouldn’t be seen nor cause trouble. Alys would be provided for as long as she remembers his place and their affair over.
Aemma could order her death if she pleased as it was her legal right as his wife and queen.
There was no use to Alys now that the war was over and he was king consort, besides he would have many more children with Aemma who would be of the right blood anyways.
It was a cruel fate for Alys, but she was his lover not his wife and she knew how the world works.
The ruins of the Dragonpit loom over as a testament of the war’s cruelty as he rides through with no parade or anything to show who he was.
People had lost their fear of him even after he defeated Daemon because unlike his wife, he no longer had a dragon nor an army. People had lost their respect for him when they learned the rumors of Alys being true.
They sneered at him, pelted him with rotten food and called him every name under the sun.
Even his mother wasn’t spared in the smallfolk’s insults.
But Aemma was adored, seen as the beautiful princess who avenged her mother by killing his brother with her dragon as mother was forced to watch.
Seen as the rightful ruler, as the savior of the realms and their family.
Aemond supposed he deserved some of it, but really, they act as if he was the first man to take a whore during wartime.
No matter, after he swears fealty to his wife ---who will forgive him for sure--- and is instated in his rightful place by her side he will make them all pay for this disrespect.
“I promised you I wouldn’t die, my queen.” The prince cannot help but smile when he sees her on the Throne.
His beautiful wife with thick slivery ringlets and lilac eyes wearing the red and black of House Targaryen.
Aemond almost forgives her for having him presented to her court as Prince Aemond the Kinslayer.
“That was the one promise you kept, husband.” She replied with a steely look in her eyes.
So his infidelity had hurt more than he had assumed it would. Aemond cared deeply for his wife, but he had spent an entire year without her, and he wasn’t made of stone.
Alys had been there to fill in the blank and help him cheat the Stranger if he kept her as his paramour. He came to care for her too, but never as much as he did for the girl he wed twice.
“And for that I intend to apologize for till the end of my days, my love.”
Aemma had always been the one he would love until his last breath and the only person Aemond would grovel at her feet for her forgiveness.
“Shall I prove it to you by swearing my oath to you, my wife and queen?” he asked taking Dark Sister, the sword he had claimed the night he survived the God’s Eye.
His own sword, the one Aemma had her grandsire find in Essos, had been lost in the water along with Vhagar, but Visenya’s Blade was more than adequate to replace it.
“You may.” The queen does not appear to have been moved, her dragon’s blood had shone through and provided the armor that led her to survive all their family.
But underneath the steel lies the soft beating heart of the girl he loved; all he must do was crack its hardened shell.
For all her claims of being strong, Aemma feels herself pathetically weak.
He speaks as if nothing had changed, as if he didn’t break her heart a thousand times even before he took the whore for his lover.
She doesn’t want to forgive him, even if the remaining greens demand he remain her husband and consort as part of their surrender.
There are no feasts, no sign of celebration about his return to her.
They are to have a quiet reunion and he will see the babe on who’s life he had sworn on when he promised her he wouldn’t kill her little brother.
She hates him.
She loved the boy he was but hates the man who stands before her thinking she would forgive him.
It pains Aemma to know their love was never meant to be anything but a tragedy, even as Aemond holds his son in his arms and the sapphire eye cries just as it would if it had been a real one.
Their son sleeps in the cradle they shared as babes, and it is the fact that he looks and even sounds like the boy she wed that has her hand shaking.
It is a wonder his dagger has not fallen from her hands.
“I am sorry for waking him, Aemee, I just couldn’t resist holding him after so long.” He apologized as he had tried to do earlier before she left the room claiming to have a meeting with the new stewards.
But the truth is she left because she cannot forgive him.
His touch revolted her, his mouth had tasted of the blood he spilled and made her spill and the mere idea of having to live with the man who trampled everything she gave him under his foot had made her realize what she had to do.
She was never meant to rule with her true love beside her, she was never meant to be happy, and he was never meant to live while her brothers are dead.
“Kill him!” Luke’s voice hissed in her ears.
“Avenge me and yourself, sister!” the ghost was joined by others who died because Aemond wasn’t man enough to stand against his fucking mother.
She doesn’t know when she raised the knife, Aemma barely registered what she had done when she plunged it into Aemond’s back.
“Aemma, what are you doing?!” He is shocked and bleeding and yet not fast enough to stop her from plunging it a second time as he tries to stop her.
“Aemee, please, this isn’t you!” He tries as the blood comes out of his wounds and yet she manages to stab and slash his torso as he fought her.
He tries not to use force, fearing he might hurt her, and she gives into her hysteria as she takes advantage of his pain and injuries to kill him.
“Aemma, I’m sorry!” he cries out before she dealt the final blow.
Aemma sobs violently and finally lets the knife fall from her hands.
The guards find her cradling his bloody corpse as she cries like she has never done so before. Her baby son echoes her cries as bloody as his parents on the nursery's floor.
The queen only hears the guards send for her grandfather and the maesters as she grieves for herself and Aemond and all they could have been if it hadn’t been for the fucking war.
“I love you, I’m sorry!” she begs the corpse with his face frozen in horror at knowing what she did.
“I killed him, I killed him, I killed him!” she sobs violently as her grandfather tries to pry her off Aemond’s body.
“You didn’t, the whore did, she wanted to kill the three of you because he discarded her as all men do.” The Seasnake takes control as any Hand would do and before evening the nursery is spotlessly clean and Aemond’s body wrapped in linen atop a pyre.
As far as anyone knows, Alys Rivers had snuck into the nursery with her so called magic and murdered the prince consort when she couldn’t kill her.
As far as anyone knows the queen was his loving wife until the end and no one mourns him as much as she does as she pressed her lips to his one last time.
#aemma velaryon#aemond targaryen x velaryon!oc#someone will remember us fic#aemma x aemond#what souls are made of series
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Merlin's Song
Hidden and alone In a jail of stone, Hating the deceitful nymph I thought was all my own,
I dream but do not sleep, I mourn but cannot weep, While all along my supine form The dust is growing deep.
The final toll is pealed, My liege's doom is sealed: Without my arts to lend him aid He'll die on Camlann's field,
And Camelot will fall-- The throne, the Table, all. Sad Guinevere within her cell Will weave her love a pall.
My books of prophecy Proclaimed that this would be: A fool was I to challenge Fate And cruel Eternity.
So farewell, light of day. Like air I fade away-- Upon my cracked and mildewed lips, The name of Nimue.
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